kNDORA ..... .^ ^^ * SALZSCHEIDEFL AT LOS ANGELES ROBERT ERNEST COWAN . o i O t* PANDORA A NOVEL BY MRS. SALZSCHE1DER, SAN FRANCISCO THF, WH1TAKER & RAY COMl'ANY (INCORPORATED) 1901 CORYRIGHT, I9OI BY MRS. ALBERT SALZSCHEIDER. ***> L' i' J i* & * * j +,;t ? '' i '- /'' 1 ! 'f* J s, i - rj *;! >" '^ v "7'" "--., J ^ J? tt t* v " > ,*T ,*1 J '* '^ * ' " ' " ' CONTENTS. Chapter. Page. I. A Bird's-Eye View of the World 5 II. A Lesson in Love 17 III. Debits and Credits 27 IV. "Without Orange Blossoms 33 V. With Orange Blossoms 53 VI. "Stars and Stripes" 61 VII. An Affair of the Heart 69 VIII. An Affair Without Heart 75 IX. More "Stripes" 87 X. Northern Blasts 93 XI. "Love and War" 101 XII. The Glass Eailway 121 XIII. Favors versus Disfavors 135 XIV. Dreams 153 XV. Awakenings 171 XVI. Kesults 177 XVII. The Dim Future 193 (3) 286107 PANDORA CHAPTER I. A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW OF THE WORLD. "More beautiful than 'Pandora,' upon whom all the gods bestowed their gifts." The above quotation uttered, involuntarily, by the curate of our parish, upon first viewing my infantile charms, impressed a classical few of the congregation present with a sense of its incongruous, adaptability. They had come to see the minister's new baby, the little life which had cost him that of his wife, and to tender congratulatory sympathy to himself. But rind ing my father totally absorbed in his new sorrow and apparently oblivious of my existence, which seemed al so near a termination, they took upon themselves the responsibility of christening and calling me "PAN- DOEA" a circumstance I lived to regret, as this heathenish introdudtion into the sanctified atmosphere of his manse may have intensified a prejudice already (5) 6 PANDORA. formed of me, by the fact of my mother's death and my birth being synonymous, as he never suffered himself to call me, excepting to family prayers, making that ob servance one of moment, to me at least, if not of inter est. And lacking the parental attentions and supply of toys which fall to the lot of more fortunate children, either from force of habit or want of better amusement, I acquired the all too early, but not unfeminine, habit of admiring my features in a hand-glass, which Nurse Fetterly would produce when duty called her elsewhere. For hours I would lie upon my little back, gazing in silent wonder and admiration at the lovely reflection, and cooing approval until the mirror would fall from my grasp, when my only recourse would be an exami nation of each dimpled finger and toe. This weakness she soon discovered, and used as a sedative upon all oc casions, fostering it as I grew older, and, for the lack of interest others displayed,endeavored to compensate me by a generous administration of flattery, seasoned with bitter reflections. But I was not satisfied with being lovely. I wanted to be loved, and as the years crept over my young head I craved it from all with whom I came in contact. My sister Irene professed to love me, but my father held first place in her heart. This knowledge rankled with- A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW OF THE WORLD. 7 in me. The more so as he absorbed almost her entire attention, and I alone o! his three children was not admitted within the sacred precincts of his "study." I envied her in those days because she was so much to him, though her youth was an era of untiring self-de nial in his behalf of ceaseless sermon writing, parish visiting, and strenuous efforts to cover a loss which, from constant brooding, had changed his nature. Leo, my brother, and elder by three years, was also fond of me in his careless, school-boy fashion, and when he condescended to play with me I was happy; but when not attending school or rehearsing lessons with our parent, his inclinations more often led him away, while I, being a girl, must remain at home, and when the iron-latched gate of our high board fence clanged behind him, I don't believe the young chick, hatched out by mistake among a brood of ducklings and seeing them take to water for the first time, felt more desolate than I. My father's indifference was a source of great dis quietude to me, and many and varied were the plans concocted in my childish brain for gaining his approval; each one more fruitless than the last. Being charita bly disposed by nature, among other things I one day conceived the idea of ingratiating myself into his good- 8 PANDORA. will, as well as that of a sick parishioner, by unusual magnanimity. Something similar to the missions of love I had seen my sister perform, vary ing only in that I was ignorant of the laws of economy or equal distribution; therefore the pleasant surprise long planned, in which I was to be suddenly transformed from the realms of despair to a pinnacle of glory, fell far short of my ex pectations, and really seemed the turning point in my life. It consisted in confiscating our Sunday dinner from the kitchen during cook's temporary absence, and having escaped the vigilance of the others, with much difficulty conveyed the greasy, cumbersome substance half a mile, unaided, being unwilling to share the glory with any other, triumphantly depositing it, basket and all, upon the exterior of an old neighbor woman's stom ach who was suffering with cancer of that organ while she lay in bed. My intentions, as I explained before, were the best, but the enormity of the offense was made so palpable, I felt compelled to renounce all Good Samaritan proclivities, and turned elsewhere for diversion. Endowed with an active, ambitious nature, the mo notony and aimlessness of my existence seemed unbear able, intensifying with the seasons. My whole soul re belled against such isolation, and longed for a change. A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW OF THE WORLD. 9 Nurse Fetterly continually told me I was beautiful, and having nothing else to divert my mind I mused much over it, longing to hear it from others, and when my fourteenth birthday arrived I resolved, come what might, to go to my father, and apprising him of the fact, request equal privileges with Irene and Leo the privilege, at least, of an occasional walk in the village, unattended by Nurse Fetterly, and minus the unsightly sun-bonnet which screened my features from view. He was dictating a sermon to Irene as I entered, and, glancing nervously over his shoulder in my direction, half rose, as though to avoid the scene my unusual presence and determined face might indicate, but find ing the entrance obstructed, reseated himself, looking inquiringly at Irene, who appeared worried, while I felt relieved to see her there. "What is it, dear?" she said, a little impatiently, glid ing toward me, and endeavoring with one arm about my waist to lure me outside; but I maintained my ground regardless of her, firmly and doggedly stating my mission. He listened with the resignation of despair until I announced the momentous occasion of my birthday an niversary, which I had withheld to the last as a reserve force, when, starting up suddenly with white, accusing 10 PANDORA. face, he waved me from him. I watched Irene run, terror-stricken, to him with a glass od: water, and help him to a lounge, then, turning, fled. Disappointed, snubbed, angry, and feeling only sympathy with myself for being alive, I defiantly tore the obnoxious sun-bon net from my head, rending it into shreds. Experienc ing afterward the utmost satisfaction in surveying the wreck, and intensely relieved from the encumbrance, I raced desperately about the grounds with my brother, in mad pursuit of gaudy-winged butterflies, then, breathless and panting, flung myself down upon the unmowed grass to rest, each beautiful, quivering cap tive of the chase pinned securely and ruthlessly to my bib. My brother stood surveying me. A new light seemed to have dawned upon him, a new interest in me to have developed. "Pandora," he said, regarding me less condescend ingly than usual, through, for once, unbiased brotherly blue eyes, "you are the prettiest girl I ever saw, if you are my sister. Your eyes and hair are exactly the same color, and your skin I never knew it was so white. Ye gods! Would not the college boys be your slaves if they could see you now/' Leo's praise was as nectar to me, and when he had gone I gloated silently over his words, and running to A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW OF THE WORLD. H a pond near by, peered earnestly into its depths, to study the situation for myself. This is what I saw: An oval face with skin of almost dazzling whiteness. Long, sleepy, almond-shaped, hazel eyes, with lashes of inky blackness and unusual length; Grecian nose and perfectly shaped lips; the whole marred slightly by a shortness of chin, which I had somewhere heard indicated weakness. Instinctively I covered it with some of the heavy, overhanging loose curls. The effect was more pleasing; then, like Nar cissus I gazed long and rapturously, for, like Narcis sus, I was in love with my own image. As the captive-reared lion accidentally discovers his strength, so did I learn the power of my beauty. Nurse Fetterly from an upper window beheld the sun play havoc with my fair skin, protesting loudly, unheeded by me. I was reckless, and chafed under restraint. With longing eyes I regarded the high board fence which surrounded our grounds and screened me from the outside world. Although forbidden to leave its gates unattended there was nothing to prevent my scaling the obstruction. Another moment and I was perched upon one of its posts, both shapely legs dang ling streetward, beaming felicitously with eyes un- 12 PANDORA. shielded by cotton sun-bonnet upon the scene below. The breeze played mad pranks wiith my lilac frock, and wafted the ends of my white pinafore backward like cherub's wings, but made no impression upon the heavy, overhanging, loose auburn curls which fell in rich pro fusion about my shoulders, forming a charming back ground for classic features, and an interesting picture to passers-by, who paused to comment, while I re mained unmoved, thinking it but my due. Presently, there came in sight, with a firm, elastic step and whistling some lively air, a youth who pos sessed more than passing interest for me. It was Rex Hilborne, only son of our member of parliament and college chum of my brothers. I knew him by a photo graph of him which hung in the latter's room. Noting his absorption 1 felt I would be unobserved unless something unusual happened to arrest his atten tion, and I wanted him to see me. In my hand I held a small volume of the life of Cleopatra, the Egyptian queen, which that morning I had slipped surreptitiously into my blouse, awaiting an opportunity to read it. I dropped this upon the pavement at his feet. Stopping suddenly he recovered it, then turned a laughing, ruddy face upwards, expecting to find my brother the culprit, but seeing me the smile died upon A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW OF THE WORLD. 13 his lips, and as though intoxicated by the unforeseen apparition he let the volume fall again, reddening visibly. Child though I was, I realized my influence, bring ing it immediately into play. 'Tick that up," I said, imperiously. Without a word he did so, standing submissively before me. "Now hand it to me," I commanded. He obeyed again in a dazed way, after glancing hurriedly at the title. "Why do you not go now?" I asked, for he stood hat in hand, irresolute. "I want you to promise me one thing first," hesitat ingly- "Well?" "Do not read that book." "Why not?" I asked, though knowing I had seen proper to conceal it, and secretly appreciating the in terest he displayed in me. "Because well I don't know, but," stammering, "if I had a sister I should not allow her to read it." "Pugh," I said, pursing my lips in mock disdain, "I don't believe I should like you for my brother, then. Leo lets me read anything I choose, and never tells on me, either. But but," kicking the boards of the 14 PANDORA. fence with one heel of iny shoe, and causing little flakes of dust to fall into his eyes, which he was compelled to rub vigorously in consequence, "he will not read them to me, and'' falteringly "I cannot always make out the big words. He says," with downcast eyes, while I pleated vigorously little tucks in my freshly laundered bib, "that there is no fun in wasting so much time on one's own sister." I peeped sideways at him. He was industriously tracing some letters on the earth sidewalk, which my quick eye detected to be PANDORA. "Do you ever read stories to other fellows' sisters ?" I asked, encour aged by the observation, and glancing down coquet- tishly at him from beneath my long eyelashes. By this time he had rubbed all the dust from his eyes, which beamed back radiantly into mine at the im plied suggestion, and without hesitation, answered, "Yes, if they ask me to." "Cleopatra?" I queried again in questioning surprise, not unmixed with chagrin, thinking he might have framed himself some other excuse for seeing me, as I had an inborn intuition of right and wrong, and this musty, worm-eaten volume which Nurse Fetterly had ferrited from her own belongings for my edification, with the injunction that 1 keep it out of sight of niy A BIRD'S-EYE VIEW OF THE WORLD. 15 father and Irene, was to me the outside limit of gor geous depravity. "Why not?" a little sheepishly, then in more persua sive tones as he turned to go. "May I not come to morrow? I like to read to other fellows' sisters." "Would you read it to rne if I were your own sister," I persisted, for something in his face angered me, but he turned laughingly away without replying, and I was un willing now that he should, and called to him, having become in a perfect fury by this time. "Come back, I have lost my slipper." Retracing his steps he recovered it, and was tenderly attempting its adjustment, I having placed my foot in a position indic ative of it, when, without warning, I shot that member out with marvelous dexterity, striking him full in the face. I saw him stagger, and blood spurt from his nose as a result ; then quickly righting himself as I swayed back ward having lost my balance in the effort he grasped me by one leg in time to avert a fall, which would un doubtedly have broken my neck. Then with some in dignation stamped upon his blood-stained but withal handsome countenance upturned to my downcast, un- regretful one, he reproached me. "You made a request of me and then went into a 16 PANDORA. rage because I agreed to it, when you know if I had not done so you would have felt snubbed, and been still more angry. I wonder you do not kick me again for preventing your fall in such an undignified manner. If I had stopped to think," continued this young philos opher, addressing no one in particular this time, appar ently, while he held a handkerchief pressed tightly to his face in desperate efforts to stop the flow, lingering with the hope that I might relent sufficiently to offer some apology or regret, "I might perhaps have saved myself many future kicks; but," shrugging his shoul ders and walking disgustedly away at sight of my unre lenting face, "a fellow always does make a fool of him self over a pretty girl." When I recounted the adventure to Nurse Fetterly my one confidante she laughed immoderately, and told me it was but a beginning to the mischief my eyes would work upon all who saw them, but clasped me closely to her heart upon hearing of my narrow escape from a horrible death. Afterward, noting the strug gling, pinioned victims upon my bib, she exclaimed: "Bless the child! whatever has come over her, any way. Not long since she would cry her pretty eyes out if any creature were in pain; now she takes pleasure in inflicting it, and every year she grows worse. Dear, dear, whatever will become of her ?" CHAPTEK II. A LESSON IN LOVE. "A little western flower, Before milk-white, now purple with love's wound; And maidens call it love-in-idleness." Notwithstanding my apparently discouraging intro duction to Rex Hilborne, as a result of the escapade a warmer friendship developed between he and Leo, with apparent advantage to myself, as the former frequently visited the manse, while I had risen many degrees in the estimation of the latter, both boys inviting my participation in their games, which were well named, as Bex would not defeat me in anything. My most exacting demands were law to him; his servitude a de lightful novelty to me. One of the greatest benefits he conferred upon me was to intercede with my father for my liberty outside; he finally consenting in order to retain his own within, and partly for a great partiality, he possessed for the petitioner, while I took "the goods the gods provided" and asked no questions, triumphantly joining them in (17) 18 PANDORA. all their excursions. But my gain proved Hex Hil- borne's loss, as I became associated with his friends, who vied with him in doing me homage. Then it was I learned some new phases in his character which would only assert themselves when crossed, taking every pos sible advantage of it to torment him, and experiencing no difficulty, as a pretty girl is a power to a college boy. My slightest favor was more to them than a medal; their flattery and attentions to me what bon bons were to another child. But to Hex Hilborne it proved vexatious. From a bright, ambitious boy, he was becoming morose, irritable, and indifferent to studies; to everything in fact excepting myself and my moods. His parents, whose whole hopes were centered in him, wondered at and lamented the change, while I reveled in it. Owing perhaps to unsympathetic home surroundings, it had grown part of my nature to believe myself totally incapable of the ability of inspiring love. Attributing every attention solely to exterior attractions, I experi enced in consequence few, if any, compunctions from the result of my coquetries. I knew regret only when the missile directed toward others would rebound upon my own head, as in the following instance. A LE880N IN LOVE. 19 The afternoon will always be vividly impressed upon my memory as one of the last of a series of halcyon days, which in the thoughtlessness of youth I had be gun to believe would last for all time. It being an unusually warm day in August, and, im pelled by a desire for shade and society I had sought shelter in the manse orchard, where Leo, carefully concealed from our parent's .ministerial eye behind a hedge of blackberry bushe?, lay smoking a cigarette. The college in our academic village had closed its gates for the summer to boarders, leaving me, with the exception of Leo and Rex, destitute of friends. I was sixteen, Leo nineteen an age when other boys' sisters become preferable to their own and Eex for some unaccountable reason, had evaded me lately. I missed him, and asked my brother for an explanation. In re ply, he puffed smoke at me, looked wise, and turning over on his back to avoid further questioning, mumbled something about "girls not knowing when they were well off." Before I could reply we saw Rex approaching, pale, and with a fixed, determined purpose in his face. The boys exchanged cordial but mysterious greetings. Leo made a speedy exit, and Rex, extending to me his hand, without other preliminaries said 20 PANDOKA. "Pandora, I am going away to-night that I may try and forget you. It is utter folly throwing my life away for one who does not care for me and probably never will. My parents know all now and it is either that or" he stopped short as though he had said too much. I was astonished as well as piqued, never having dreamed of such a contingency, but I w,as proud also, and would almost rather have stooped to anything than an admission of regard now. But when I looked back upon the dull vista of years before he came into my life, and thought what the future might be without him, I believed, at least, I could compromise some way without too much degredation. "Must you go?" I asked, almost appealingly, and sit ting upright in genuine alarm, while I laid one hand detainingly upon his arm. I was appalled at myself, then, for having exhibited such concern, and thinking him not sufficiently im pressed, sought to modify it. "You surely would not go away and leave me without a soul to amuse me?" I asked, assuming an air of coquettish anxiety, garn ished with just sufficient unseasoned irony to make it unpalatable, while I swallowed a rising lump in my throat by an enforced yawn. A LESSON IN LOVE. 21 "Amuse you?" he said, bitterly; and his face, which had brightened perceptibly at the beginning of my speech, darkened as perceptibly at its close. "Do you think I was put into the world for no higher purpose than to come at your beck and call, as the humor suits you, only to be spurned when another takes your fancy? Do you think my future is of so little consequence that I can afford to waste the best years of my life pursuing a shadow? No, Pandora, I have come to the conclu sion that there are others have my interest more at heart, and it is to my advantage to leave before I be come too much enslaved." "Then go," I sneered, deeply incensed at what I con sidered my scorned concessions. "Go," and with mock indifference, "Please remember to forget me, as I shall forget to remember you." He kneeled wearily against an apple tree, upon the gnarled trunk of which I sat, seeming to weaken at my artificial strength, and bending nearer said pleadingly: "Pandora, will you be kinder to me, and give me sufficient encouragement to pursue my studies if I re main?" Still burning from the supposed affront to my dig nity, indolently rising, I stood insolently before him 22 PANDORA. in all the fresh, lithe beauty of sixteen, and with cynical significance replied: "Kinder? Yes, I will give you a photograph of my self to put on your college desk. Will not that be suffi cient?" His face flushed angrily. "If that is your opinion of me," he said vindictively, "let me tell you that it is not to your credit that you should care to have me re main, even 'to amuse' you. Another thing you may abuse, you have abused me; you shall not sneer at me. Good-by; if the result of this interview prove disap pointing, blame yourself." He raised his hat, haugh tily, and without another word, or look, walked rapidly away, leaving me in a state of wondering trepidation, and possessed of an intense longing to recall him; but lacking the moral courage, endeavored to reassure my self with the thought that I would meet him soon again and matters would right themselves. For an hour I sat there after he had gone, forming new resolutions with regard to him, always hampered by the thought of humiliating myself unnecessarily, because of my disbelief in his possessing any deep re gard for me, deeming it nothing but a rivalry among boys for the chief consideration of the fairest in the village. A LESSON IN LOVE. 23 Not being in a humor to meet Leo, who was regard ing me curiously a little distance away, I meant to avoid him by reaching the house to the rear of the shrubbery, and upon emerging from its thickness came suddenly upon the Honorable Mr. Hilborne, the father of Rex, and my own parent in earnest conversation, which ceased abruptly as I approached, and was a pre lude to what followed when Irene, after dinner, calling me aside, timidly informed me that it had been de cided I was to be sent immediately to boarding-school. "You know, dear," she said, by way of explanation, "you are growing quite a young lady now, and, apart from father's requiring my attention more every day, I hardly feel myself competent to continue your studies unaided any longer." This was all; no allusion to Eex or his departure; yet I felt instinctively he would remain, and our late visitor was instrumental in my hurried exit. If he had so suggested it was sufficient. He was a pillar of the church I but a thorn in his side. Then they had given me no loophole for questioning. I must abide by this evasion of the truth, or commit myself ridicu lously. The idea of boarding-school, as they well knew, was repugnant to me, but not more so than an appeal for 24 PANDORA. consideration. Experience had taught me the hollow- ness of such things. What distressed me most, though, was the uncertainty as to how far Rex was concerned in it. One moment I would bite my lips in mortifica tion at even the half-hearted confession made, then again think the error lay in its incompleteness. Final ly, I left without bidding him adieu. Leo embraced me bashfully when I was ready to go, Nurse Fetterly hugged and cried over me alternately, while my father, who had risen early to prepare his nerves for the unavoidable ordeal of an adieu, awaited my coming with Irene and smelling salts in the back ground. I entered almost at the last moment, with Leo as second. A feeling of hungry desolation at heart, and with a lingering hope he would receive me kindly, half raised my lips to be kissed. He met me with a melancholy forced smile, accom panied by a sigh, fumbling vainly about in his vocabu lary for something to say. But there was no bond of sympathy between us, and with pitiable awkwardness he attempted to shorten the interview by extending to me in farewell one hand and a bunch of tracts. The other toyed impatiently, I thought, with the leaves of a Bible, an indication that its leaves would be under consideration the moment I made mv exit. A LESSON IN LOVE. 25 None of these details escaped my notice. Dropping the tracts and a mock courtesy, with Irene's reproach ful kiss upon my lips, and the unaired, musty smell of the "study" clinging to my nostrils, half blinded by efforts to conceal angry tears, and accompanied by Leo, I drove to the station he endeavoring to atone for parental short-comings by unusual attentions; I resent ing the officiousness by alternate paroxysms of ill- humor, and hysterical hilarity. CHAPTEE III. DEBITS AND CREDITS. "Love goes towards love, as schoolboys from their books; But love from love, towards school with heavy looks." Boarding-school, after two years of freedom, seemed insufferable, particularly as I had been unaccustomed to the society of girls, and did not understand them, nor they me. Consequently, I was unpopular. They did not attempt to disguise their admiration for my beauty, but resented what they termed hauteur in one of the shabby-genteel type, and stood aloof, leaving me, with an unquenchable desire to be one of them, and not even a Borrienne for consolation. Inasmuch as I was ignorant of my summary dismissal from home, I determined to hold communication with none of them; a resolution steadfastly adhered to until their letters finally ceased. Months passed, I hearing nothing, knowing nothing. Watching my schoolmates receive numerous- and affec tionate missives, I longed for an excuse to remove the barrier formed by myself: It came in the form of a let- (27) 28 PANDORA. ter from Hex. I apologized to myself for my eagerness in opening it by the fact of its opportune arrival. He had written, he said, at the request of my family. It was solicitous and interesting, but not affectionate. Enclosed was a line or two from Leo, extolling the for mer's good qualities, and enlarging upon the pleasure both boys were deriving from the smiles of a new beauty. I retired to my dormitory disappointed, resolving, after a fierce conflict between pride and passion, to leave the letter unanswered, being rewarded three weeks later by the receipt of another, so demonstrative in profes sions of love and fidelity, I wondered if he had not been imbibing too freely of the "cup that cheers" as well as inebriates; but at least he had furnished me with suffi cient excuse to reply, and when it seemed time enough had elapsed, I responded, in as formal a strain as I could command. The correspondence grew, and ripened, interspersed with occasional home letters. I watched anxiously for replies from Eex, even worrying when they were a day late, but always studiously avoiding any clew to my feel ings, and growing more incredulous as he became in tense. DEBITS AND CREDITS. 29 When I had been at boarding-school three years without vacation, a change came. Irene, who from my earliest recollection was the affianced of our curate, was finally prevailed upon by him to change her present thraldom for Hymen's fetters. She also won father's consent to my return home, that I might assume the role of bridesmaid at her wedding, and, when all was over., father's amanuensis in her place. Had the invitation come from him I should have felt flattered, and,, believing a change to have taken place in his feelings regarding me, would have been imbued with a new desire to please and quite as enthusiastic over the work as the wedding. But it was Irene who wrote, apparently solicitous of our parent's comfort and happiness only, leading me to wonder what extreme influence had been brought to bear in obtaining his toleration of the innovation and the deprivation of Irene. But I did not attempt to propound the riddle then, being only desirous of release from school, where home worries had occupied my mind to the detriment of study. Although Irene would be considered a pretty girl, her beauty was not to be compared to mine and I must apologize here for my apparent conceit regarding my self, which, being in the past tense, seems to me ex- 30 PANDORA. disable. In her white bridal robes, she was as. a sweet, modest violet; I, as some grand, imperial rose; and al though in planning our dresses everything had been done to avoid such a contingency, when I burst upon the parish for the first time, after an absence of three years, in my becoming maid-of -honor costume of cream chiffon, those present held their breath in astonish ment. Again, I had grown half a head taller than Irene, and the bread and butter and calisthenics of boarding-school had rounded and developed my figure to perfection, while she was small and unusually slight the contrast throwing my sister a little into insignificance. But they loved her and stood in awe of me. After the ceremony her friends rallied. She was surrounded, congratulated, and caressed, while, but for Eex, I should have been comparatively alone in my miserable glory. He had stood at the altar with me as groomsman, and when liberated rushed to my side, and devouring me with his eyes, deluged me with unconcealed com pliments. "To say you are beautiful," he exclaimed, "would be mild. You are ravishing; like a Greek goddess." He longed to be a sculptor to immortalize my classic fea- DEBITS AND CREDITS. 31 tures, or a painter, to transfer to canvas the Titian tints of my hair and eyes. Then he would wish I were less lovely I seemed so impossible. Thus began my second term of flattery, which upon this occasion I turned from petulantly, imagining it tinged with sympathy. For of all people I did not want Rex to pity my friendlessness. CHAPTER IV. WITHOUT ORANGE BLOSSOMS. "Perhaps I know thee better Than had I known thee longer, yet it seems That I have always known thee, and but now Have found thee. Ah! I have been waiting long." My new vocation of amanuensis to father, as might have heen expected, proved a failure. He endeavored to tolerate me and throw aside that restraint so diffi cult to overcome, once contracted between near rela tives, and which had hecome habitual in my presence. But my sprawly, school-girl hand and lack of interest in the work, which I felt was not appreciated, afforded him an opportunity of severing the apprenticeship, which had been little short of purgatory to both of us. With an intense sigh of relief I shook from my feet the dust of the "study," which had long since lost interest for me, fraught as it was with nothing but unpleasant memories, and wondering how Irene could have been mad enough to marry a curate and continue in the sermon-writing business for all time after having once escaped the martyrdom. 34 PANDORA. In despair, he sent for his new curate to continue my disconnected work, commissioning me to initiate him. As a result, he was horrified one Sunday morn ing on finding an ode to my eyelashes tangled up be tween the leaves of his sermon, and barely escaped reading it aloud to the congregation. The curate was dismissed, and a tired looking benedict with a wife and six children substituted. As far as I myself was concerned, there was no oc casion for alarm, as I was greatly interested in Eex. He haunted the manse. Morning, noon, and evening found him by my side when I was not otherwise oc cupied in undisputed possession, the village being again absolutely manless and little else to divert my attention. The two years had done much for Eex as well, both physically and mentally. He had grown exceptionally handsome that rich, dark, Southern type, which women so admire in the opposite sex, and no one knew better how to be entertaining or agreeable. He had recently been admitted to the bar, for which he was especially suited, being a fluent and persuasive talker. This new laurel, coupled with our long estrangement and separation, added new zest to the old friendship, until I marveled how I could ever have been dissat- WITHOUT ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 35 isfied with this one ardent admirer, whose persistent attentions had almost begun to convince me were gen uine. In my loneliness of spirit I clung to this hope, only awaiting a formal declaration of love, with the necessary accompaniment marriage as proof. There were moonlight strolls innumerable, with chaperones intolerable, and nights when the moon did not shine at all, and chaperones not of the cat spe cies' failed to see the contrasting black sleeve belt- like about my white dresses, or how unnecessarily long a time it took Eex to help me over a muddy crossing, or what a difficult matter it was to release my hand on parting, which would sometimes even be carried to his lips undiscovered, and of course I did not dare protest. Particular as father was, there was one diversion to which he never seemed to object. Perhaps he realized some license was necessary if he wished Eex to become his son-in-law, and I believe now it was one of the am bitions of his life, if he possessed any. The diversion in question was boating. Rex was the unhappy pos sessor of a bark canoe, only warranted to carry two. That in itself might have been considered an advantage to a man in love, but it was one of those peculiarly bal anced contrivances in which it is almost necessary to wear the hair parted in the center, and be certain to 36 PANDORA. smile equally upon both sides of the mouth in order to retain one's equilibrium and avoid being uncere moniously precipitated into the water, and as there is nothing so dampening to the affections, when arrayed for conquest in a freshly laundered shirt or summer dress, we had to be guarded upon these points, as well as many others, and I fear did not half appreciate fath er's confidence in us. At any rate Kex was thinking seriously of selling his canoe, and buying me a cano pied hammock upon a totally different scale. But all this, if not a digression, seems almost irrelevant as a forerunner to the accompanying scene, for an unfore seen calamity happened in the meanwhile. The mar ried curate had been foolish enough to fall a victim to what he was pleased to call my charms, and con fessing the awful truth to father, begged release from parish duties, that he might take himself far away from the witchery of my eyes, endeavoring as before to live in the affections of his wife and children. Almost distracted at this new revelation, and thoroughly disgusted with his unquiet life since my return, father sent for both Rex and myself, inform ing us of the casualty, and astounding us by the an nouncement, tremblingly but none the less firm, that Rex must marry me immediately, or he would dismiss WITHOUT ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 37 me forthwith to some feminine institution, where I could be educated as a teacher, remaining until a posi tion could be procured for me, as he could not have me at home to create a disturbance among the curates, and disgrace him in the eyes of the congregation. I was horrified and incensed, feeling neither of them had been given any encouragement; curates were not to my liking. My face burned with indignation and shame at the injustice of the outbreak, while Eex looked alarmed. It seemed to me a greater indignity could not have been perpetrated than this indecent thrusting of me at Rex by my own parent, were the former ever so willing and to my excited fancy he seemed anything but that just then. Eex was about to speak utter a protest, I supposed when I inter rupted. "Father," I said, stepping up to him almost threat eningly, voice and form trembling with outraged emo tion, "if I am such a hindrance and disgrace to you I shall go, but I will never marry Rex. Had such an idea ever existed with him, you have this afternoon put it entirely out of my power to comply. Another thing, you shall not choose for me my path in life. From infancy you have shown your entire lack of affection for me. This action is but one more stumbling-block 286107 38 PANDORA. in the way of good resolutions." I paused for want of breath, not words, and father had raised his arm as though to ward off the completion, while Rex laid his hand upon my arm, appealingly; but I had not finished, and drew away impatiently. "If I have not matured as you wished, you have only yourself to blame; I had no mother to guide me." Over my parent's face a greenish hue overspread it self, such as I had seen on previous occasions at men tion of my mother's name, only worse. He gave sev eral successive gasps, and pointing to a bottle, indi cated that Hex should bring it to him. During the absorption of this act I hurried away, without any set purpose in view, excepting to set as much space as possible between these two and myself. Passing through the gate I wandered aimlessly sev eral miles from home, until coming to a large tree in the suburbs of the village, where I sat down to rest and think over the situation, which, in my highly agi tated condition, seemed appalling. ^N"ear by, some men were at work, preparing the road for a new railway, but I was too much perturbed to notice the nature of the work, and had turned my back to avoid observation, when, without warning,! felt myself being suddenly lifted from the ground. An- WITHOUT ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 39 other moment and I was being rapidly and unceremo niously conveyed, without any pause, over several hun dred yards of ground by a pair of sturdy male legs, then quite as suddenly landed upon terra firma again by my strange kidnapper, who at its termination stood panting and exhausted from the exertion before me, too much out of breath to explain, even, and I had not regained my own scattered senses sufficiently to utter a protest, when a deafening crash, like a loud bolt of thunder, came from where the now safely lo cated men had been working. A grayish pallor for an instant overspread my com panion's face, then disappeared, and drawing a long breath of relief, with clasped hands and eyes upraised to heaven, he said fervently, as though communing with himself, "Heaven be praised, for we barely es caped it." "Escaped what?" I demanded angrily, and giving him an indignant look. "I would like to know the meaning of all this, and of what earthly use my legs are if I may not be permitted to use them." He regarded me meditatively a moment, then draw ing nearer said seriously, mopping the while great beads of perspiration from a brow which, now that the habitual color had returned to it, was not much less red: 40 PANDORA. "Little girl, we had no time for ceremony. I just happened to notice you at almost the last moment, and it is well I did, for," looking down upon me from his superior height, with crossed arms and an expres sion of reverent admiration upon his face, "had I not seen you when I did, I much fear your folks would not even have had the poor consolation of your burial." A shudder passed over him as he spoke. "Did you not know my men were blasting?" he asked, this time with the slightest shade of petulance in his tone, born of my indifference and the sneer upon my lips, which in turn had been called forth by his al lusion to my people. "If you doubt the danger you were in," he said im patiently when I shrugged my shoulders, "just look there," pointing to the spot from which he had car ried me. I looked, and in spite of myself also shuddered, for the huge tree had been literally torn up by its roots, leaving an immense hole in the ground beside which, all unconscious of impending danger, I had rested. "We both regarded the spot in awed silence for tfre space of a minute. I was the first to break it. "Would it have been a very painful death?" mus- WITHOUT ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 41 ingly, with my eyes bent now in half regretful interest upon the spot. Something in my tone and demeanor caused him to shift his gaze quickly to my face again. For a mo ment he studied me intently. "Painful?" he asked, as though not quite sure he had understood me, and then "Well," musingly, "perhaps not exactly that. Cer tainly not so much for you as for those who would suffer by your loss, for I don't believe you yourself would have known exactly what had happened to you; but," absently, "may I sit down beside you? That run has shortened my breath." I could not well refuse him a seat beside me upon the mound, after having saved my life, and although not in any humor for entertaining, acquiesced. "Well," I said, after he had placed himself beside me, "I suppose I ought to have been very grateful to you for having saved my life at the risk of your own, but," with a half passionate, and wholly miserable quaver in my voice, "if the pain as you say would have been little to myself, let me assure you you have after all accomplished little, for there is not a creature upon earth who would suffer by my sudden taking off." It was not usual for me to confide my affairs to 42 PANDORA. anyone, much less a stranger, but I had to say some thing to him, and even this slight inference relieved the strain upon me. His eyes, which had been fastened upon mine, seemed to have gathered from the intentness of the gaze, their mist. "Why, how is this, little girl?" he asked in perplex ity, and scrutinizing me even more closely. "You not cared -for? You not caring to live? It hardly seems possible," dubiously, and yet devoid of coquetry. He took one of my hands which hung listlessly by my side in his, stroked it once in a fatherly, reassur ing fashion, then laid it gently down again, afterward dropping his head meditatively in both palms. I did not answer, but moved petulantly a little away, and tapping my foot nervously upon the green sward, wished he would go. "Are your folks poor ?" he queried hesitatingly, and carefully studying me again from head to foot; but there was nothing in my appearance which would in dicate either poverty or affluence. From a highly educated person, I would have re sented such a pointedly, personal question, but he did not seem to come under that heading exactly, and the tone, and whole demeanor, were far from impudent, WITHOUT ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 43 besides I had to excuse much under the circumstances. "Poor and unappreciative," I answered, now that the "ice wias broken." He looked sympathetic, and after a still closer scru tiny of my features this time said, less insinuatingly than questioningly: ''Well, I should think there would be plenty of young men in your neighborhood glad to relieve them of such a burden." "It seems not, for I am still in the market," I an swered evasively, and a little amused, in spite of my self. The reply appeared to puzzle him considerably. For about five minutes he remained silent; during which time he seemed to be looking into my very soul. I was becoming annoyed and uneasy under the pres sure, when he suddenly asked in as ordinary a tone as though he were inquiring into my nationality: "Are you your parents 1 respectable ?" I laughed immoderately at this. It struck me in such a peculiar light; but he was strangely serious. And I had begun to think him quite as much of a curiosity as he evidently regarded me. Upon regain ing composure I set his mind at rest upon that point at least, by revealing my identity, adding cynically, 44 PANDORA. "If respectability is the principal requisite of a Chris tian father and minister, I am to be envied." He appeared much relieved at the information. He said he knew my father well from hearsay, intro ducing himself unostentatiously as Donald Macdonald, a railway contractor, and informed me he only in tended remaining in the village long enough to super intend the most intricate portions of the work, after which business called him to San Francisco, in Cali fornia. He enlarged upon his reluctance to go so far away from home, dwelling particularly and regretfully upon his prospective loneliness among strangers. Then relapsing once again into silence, took another long and careful survey of my face. Mr. Macdonald's name and history were quite fa miliar to me. The son of a humble farmer, not five hundred miles from where I lived, he had, through his own exertions, amassed quite a fortune. He was con sidered the most proficient man in his line in the coun try, and stood well in the community. Never before having seen him I returned the scrutiny with interest. He was a well-built man of between thirty and thir ty-five years; of generous dimensions, but clumsy movements; florid complexioned, and red bearded. He was arrayed in a conspicuous, ill-fitting suit of home- WITHOUT ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 45 spun plaid, while a tie of brilliant sky blue adorned his collarless neck. Long, red-topped boots and a huge straw hat completed the outfit. Having completed the examination to his evident satisfaction he moved a trifle nearer. I drew my hand away, fearing he would again take it in his, but he did not appear to notice the motive, being wholly absorbed in his own thoughts. "Miss Delaney," he began, a trifle nervously, and there was a worried look in his eyes. "I feel that you are in trouble of some sort. I have never been used to womenkind, apart from my mother, never even hav ing had a sister, and my efforts at sympathy may seem clumsy to you, but I mean to be kind. Is it some thing you can tell me? Perhaps there might be a way in which I could be of service to you, if you will but trust me." He looked appealingly down into my face with such a genuine kindly look of interest and sympathy for me, so totally different from anything I had ever before experienced, that my overwrought nerves yielded to the pressure brought to bear, forcing the unbidden tears to my eyes, and I barely escaped giving way com pletely. Noting my discomfiture and desperate efforts at com- 46 PANDORA. posure, he bent his eyes with forced intentness upon his boots, until I had succeeded in assuming a different attitude, then inquired solicitously if he might not see me safely to my father's roof, adding judiciously that the late shock had probably unnerved me, and that I would feel better once at home. I declined his offer, flushing guiltily, for I had enter tained no idea of returning, and his persistence forced me to confess it. "Will you not be friendly enough with me to con fide your plans then," he begged. I was becoming annoyed under the catechism. Then the afternoon was advancing and I wanted time to make them. "I have none," I answered doggedly. "Had you continued with your work and left me to my medita tions, matters might have adjusted themselves satis factorily." "Miss Delaney," he said, kindly, but firmly, "you are too young to talk in that way. I know not your trou ble, but if I am not much mistaken I do know it is nothing serious, and that the world still holds a great deal for you." He endeavored his utmost to persuade me to re turn, and there was something about his reasoning WITHOUT ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 47 which soothed and quieted me, so I found it almost a relief to confide in him as to my uncongenial home surroundings. Indeed, I was almost myself again in all but my determination not to return. But as I progressed, I noticed his face grew longer, his efforts lessened, then ceased. He finally rose to his feet, paced back and forth in front of me a minute or so in deep meditation, then abruptly took his seat beside me again. I wondered what was coming, for he looked much as a tender-hearted person would who Had found a maimed kitten and wanted to dispose of it to the best possible advantage to itself. I was not long in doubt. "Miss Delaney," he began again, without further preliminaries, "do you think you could be content to marry a big, awkward fellow like myself, and go with him to the Pacific Coast? You are not rich, and un happy, I know; while I at least have means, and can gratify your whims, which is something, I suppose, to a young girl. I am not a university graduate nor yet a society man, but I will do my utmost to make you happy. It is said, you know, that a good son will make a kind husband; and I think my folks will verify the former, if you can trust to the latter. I pledge 48 PANDORA. you my word I will do my duty by you." He again bent his eyes upon his boots. To say I was surprised would not begin to express my amazement. I was dumbfounded. Rendered in capable of speech for a minute. The dynamite ex plosion of a short space previous sank into insignifi cance beside it. Yet, and notwithstanding the de pressed condition of my mind, I could not help seeing the ridiculous side of the situation. To me there was something almost ludicrous in thisl great, rough fellow's business-like proposal of mar riage, without the slightest pretense of a declaration of love, and after the brief acquaintanceship of about three-quarters of an hour. But if he was business like, I had been rendered so through force of circum stances, and after indulging in a little laughter at the situation much to his disgust a reaction set dn. Re membering the threat before leaving my father and Rex, I realized the humiliation of my position should I return and consent to one or other of his terms. To permit Rex to sacrifice himself to me upon the altar of sympathy would be my life-long degradation, while earning my own Irving would be slow suicide. I was not of the new woman type, that could stand up like a man and battle with emergencies. Then what WITHOUT ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 49 should I do? Here was someone who had come to my rescue, and at a most opportune moment. Not to my liking Ah! no. I shuddered to think of him in the capacity of a husband; but able, and willing to keep me in affluence, and yes, that seemed a great deal to me, who had always longed for luxuries and admira tion. I chuckled to myself almost fiendishly at the thunderbolt it would be to my father, upon learning the astounding news of my unconventional courtship, and 'hasty marriage to a man without refinement, edu cation, or social position, knowing he had elevated ideas regarding these things. Then in my present humor, the thought of having opposed him lent new zest. "Miss Delaney," my companion said, in half chid ing, half pleading accents, and breaking in upon my apparently ill-timed mirth and accompanying reverie, "this is no subject for jest. If the proposition is dis tasteful to you, it will be no unkindness to say so now, but in 'heaven's name spare me the pain and humilia tion of learning it later, for if I once become fond of anyone, I love them to the death." I scarcely heard him, for by this time I had actu ally begun to think seriously of the proposal, since he was willing to make me his wife, not that he loved 50 PANDORA. me or would expect it in return, but because of my beauty, which, was something he could be proud of, and lavish his gold upon. A fine gem requires a fine setting. He would exult in my beauty I do it full justice with his gold. Finally, and to my own unbounded surprise, I ac quiesced, on condition he would marry me secretly and without delay. It seemed the best way out of my diffi culties, but I wanted the affair consummated before I had time to think, and leave immediately after the ceremony. He demurred; such undue haste did not coincide with his ideas of the proprieties. But the fever of unrest was upon me. The atmosphere of my na tive village seemed stifling. I could not breathe. I must spread my wings, somewhere, anywhere, only to be away. The suggestion suited my humor, and in fear of its rejection, so near consummation, I became like one deranged. Forgetful of the fact that my present trouble was due to a humiliation forced upon me by another, I plunged into a still deeper one myself. I begged him to make me his wife, and immediately. I firmly believe he wished himself well out of the WITHOUT ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 51 affair, but either through pity or some strange mag netic influence, he seemed powerless to resist. Accordingly it was arranged the ceremony should be performed forthwith, in a neighboring town, after which I was to leave alone for San Francisco, there to await my husband until he should have performed the arduous task of informing my people of our union, and business permitted his joining me. CHAPTEE V. WITH ORANGE BLOSSOMS. "Inconstant to the crowd Thro' which I pass, as to the skies above, The fleeting summer cloud But not to thee, oh, not to thee, dear love." After the puritanical existence of a cold Canadian village, life in the great metropolis of the Pacific Coast was to me like the transformation of a creeping cater pillar, long confined in a chrysalis state, into a soar ing butterfly. I had youth, beauty, and spent money with a lavish hand in the fashionable hotel where it had pleased my husband to secure apartments for me. They asked no other credentials, extending to me the utmost courtesy the men, in honor of my beauty; the women, for fear of it. I was feted, flattered, caressed, and sought after, until there was scarcely a moment I could call my own. This cosmopolitan city, with its peculiar climatic changes, and gaiety-loving people, and its near prox imity to various smaller towns, of semi-tropical beauty, (53) 54 PANDORA. profuse in fruit and flowers, from its very novelty, held a strange fascination for me, and as though moving in an elysium dream, I gave myself up to the intoxicating influence of the present, in maddened efforts to obliter ate a disappointed past. Picnics, parties, theaters, luncheons, balls; my days and nights were one ceaseless carnival, and at the end I would fling myself down exhausted upon my couch, only to renew the attack upon the following morning, with the fervor of one who has his race upon earth to run, and would accomplish it at the most rapid gait possible, without any thought of the goal, for, what is excitement, after all, but a wearying of the flesh, a straining of one's nerves to tfie highest tension, only to discover one's energies and self-respect upon a pre mature decline? Yet I thought I enjoyed my part in this new drama of life. It was gratifying to suddenly find myself a bright, particular star in this old com pany of actors, whose personalities or performances held little interest for me, excepting as a necessary ad junct to draw out my own attractions. The typical San Francisco woman affects lusterless, blonde hair, is pretty, wears her clothes well, pro nounces duty like "dooty," drives fast horses as well as her husband, and drinks wine of local vintage as WITH ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 55 other women do water. The latter habit may be ex plained by an inherited antipathy she possesses to "foreign matter," as is frequently evinced in the sup ply of the other quality from the "Spring Valley "Water Company." The former home product has the very "material" effect of an increased avoirdupois, which to the "Native Son," however, is "immaterial." Its in dulgence may also account for a peculiar faculty she possesses of being able to talk a great deal, without say ing anything. The Native Son is deficient in quantity, and western in quality; wears a soft felt, broad brimmed hat, and a business aspect upon all occasions. The former most noticeable in the close confines of an elevator in the presence of ladies; the latter, if one has the opportunity of meeting him at a social gathering, but he is genial and generous. They seemed happy and contented in each other's society, and believing myself lacking in proper appreciation, I endeavored to adapt myself to circumstances and be one with them. The result re called my efforts once when a lonely child to assume the poise and gambles of a litter of kittens, in order to put the feftne family at their ease with me, and I felt compelled to seek refuge again behind my own indi viduality. 56 PANDORA. Generous checks were frequently forwarded me by my husband, which I promptly cashed, but no word came either from home or himself, although nearly a month had passed since my departure. The silence perplexed and worried me, as I was intensely eager to learn how the news of my marriage had been received. I wanted Rex to understand my happiness did not de pend upon him, and my father to realize the error he had made in thus cheapening me; yet in contradiction to it all I was dreadfully homesick, and during my few hours of respite would find myself living over with Rex again the blissful last weeks passed in his society, before that rude awakening. At the thought of this latter I would feel grateful to Mr. Macdonald for having agreed to release me from the bondage of a single woman in Canada and giving me the liberty of a married woman in California, and I would plunge deeper Into a sea of amusement with the apparent enthusiasm of a debu tante, but in reality experiencing only the dry, flounder ing sensation of a whale in shallow water, surrounded by smaller specimens of the "finny" tribe, thoroughly immersed themselves, and contented because in their own element. * But one morning the same mail brought me two let ters one from Mr. Macdonald and, strange to say, the WITH ORANGE BLOSSOMS. 57 other in the familiar handwriting of Rex. My first impulse was to throw the latter into the grate-fire un opened, for what motive could have prompted him to write excepting to apologize for having raised my hopes? If he should have done that, I should loath both him and myself. I put it reluctantly away, and directed my attention stoically to opening the other, a huge, yellow envelope, with one large sheet of loosely written, ruled, paper. It began "Dear Wife." I could go no further. It brought back too vividly the cold reality of my position. I could not always live on undisturbed, in an enchanted palace, like Psyche. I had sold myself to the highest bidder. Oh! Why had he written by the same mail as Eex! I flung it impatiently away, where it fell into the waste basket, unnoticed and forgotten; then half unconsciously breaking the seal of the other, I read "Loved and Lost: "Although it suits me at this moment to address you so, I cannot realize, nor do I believe, the latter. Oh, Pandora! can it be possible you have gone out of my life, in this strange, inexplicable manner ? "My brain seems in a perfect whirl; my mind in such a state of chaos, I can hardly recall the incidents of that 58 PANDORA. dreadful day. I only know you are married, and your father but forgive my selfishness if I do not dwell up on that now, and of course he I cannot say your hus band has told you the details in full. I was too un nerved to write before, and even now the effort unmans me. I am only buoyed up with the knowledge that you love me, as I love you. Do not start, dear. I saw it in your eyes the day your father gave you to me, and had you not been so impetuous, I would have taken you in my arms, and asked his blessing, but I was dazed with my happiness, and detained from following you in your flight by that other calamity. How could I know, before the sun went down, you would be the wife of another? You, my proud, imperial queen, married, and to such a man ! "Pandora, it was no marriage. You were given to me. By all the laws of love, nature, and a just Heaven, you are mine. I am the Epimephius for whom you were fashioned, and I will never believe it otherwise. Like your namesake you held a casket; it contained all our happiness, all our ambitions; you allowed them to escape ; hope alone remains, and in that hope my very life. Oh, darling! I cannot live without you. Beneath the shelter of the 'Stars and Stripes' we can yet be one, and I will begin life anew. This is all that remains for WITH ORANGE BLOSSOMS. . 59 me. You cannot now doubt my love, for it means so much the loss of friends, relatives, home, inheritance, and country. "Without this I have nothing for which to live. "In feverish expectancy- "Yours, "REX." The letter slipped idly from my fingers into my lap, and, closing my eyes upon my present surroundings, I gave myself up to a delightful reverie, repeating over and over to myself the passionate passages I had read lingeringly, lovingly, like one parting with those dearest to him on the eve of their execution, for one more glimpse of my magnificent misery would be con vincing proof of the great gulf separating me from the one love of my life. Oh, why had this impossible food of Tantalus been placed within my reach! I could have borne hunger and thirst stoically to the end, feel ing I had in some way merited the displeasure of the gods, but to have it offered me and then Oh, Rex, why did you hold out this temptation to me? I could have worshiped you but for this. It was unworthy of you, and I did not deserve it. Was not my marriage legal? Then how dare he make such a proposition ? 60 PANDORA. In the intensity of my emotions I had risen, and was nervously pacing the floor, my steps growing more rapid as my excitement increased. Passing the mirror I caught a glimpse of my face. The habitual, statuesque paleness had left it; a bright, red spot burned in either cheek. I thought my eyes unusually bright, and wild. Surely I was insane, or another face was reflected in the mirror near my own, the sweet, sad one of Mrs. Neville, a fellow-boarder who dined at the same table with myself. CHAPTER VI. "STARS AND STRIPES." "The shade by which my life was crost, Which makes a desert in the mind, Has made me kindly with my kind, And like to him whose sight is lost" Immediately I was upon the defensive ; no one, not even Mrs. Neville, should guess my secret. When the letter arrived I had been making my toilette for break fast. Luxuriant masses of hair hung unconfined like a glistening mantle about my pale blue dressing-gown. I pinned them quickly into a Psyche knot, and turning, faced her in my own imperious manner, with a cold questioning look. She was a resident of ; a widow, all sup posed, as she invariably wore black, and seldom at tended places of amusement. Apart from that we knew nothing, excepting that she was universally beloved, and had gained the name of the "angel of peace/' from the enviable faculty she possessed of being able to smooth over any little diffi culties which might arise among the boarders. (61) 62 PANDORA. From the first moment of meeting I had been strangely drawn towards Mrs. Neville, and she appeared more than interested in me, but I had never felt quite at ease with her. Those dreamy blue eyes would follow me about, with a searching melancholy wistfulness in their depths, as though they would pierce into the innermost recesses of my heart's secret. "Pardon this intrusion, dear," she said. "I missed you from the dining-room, and came to make inquiries. You did not answer my knock, and fearing something was wrong I took the liberty of entering uninvited. Why, you are ill, child," taking my face between her hands in alarm. "You are feverish; let me help you back to bed, and have some breakfast sent to you. No ? Well, then, I shall help you to dress; no, don't object because I mean to assert my authority. What beauti ful hair you have. Sit down here and I shall dress it for you. What, you doubt my ability? We shall see." She went about it all so quietly, and with such grace ful tact, it seemed impossible to resist her, nor did I care to do so. Like a tired child I sank back into the divan she had placed for me, and gave myself up to the magic of her fingers, which, as they worked, seemed to exercise a soothing effect upon my brain and over wrought nerves. "STARS AND STRIPES." 63 "How did you learn such an artistic touch ?" I asked, carried away with admiration of her skillful white fingers. Without intending it I had awakened bitter memories. Sighing she said "Ah, dear, that is part of my life history which I have never unfolded to anyone; the others in the house are such a happy, careless party, they could not appre ciate it, but I will tell you, for, although you are too young to have suffered much, I feel there is a bond of sympathy between us. Well," she began, going more slowly to work, "I was at one time maid to my hus band's sister. He was not my husband then, of course, but we met often, and became infatuated with each other. I felt myself quite his equal socially, for I was well born, though poor, and highly educated; so when he asked me to become his wife, I had no thought of objecting, because his parents might, and we married, gaining the enmity of his whole family. Outhbert was threatened with disinheritance if he did not imme diately consent to have the marriage annulled upon the plea of undue influence having been brought to bear to coerce him into the union. He laughed them to scorn, for it was a pure love match. I cared nothing for their money, and he seemed perfectly willing and glad to work for me. 64 PANDORA. "Two lovely children were born to us a boy and a girl and all went well, until one day a letter came to us here in San Francisco, where we were living, from his old home. 'His father was dying; would he bring the children, and be reconciled?' "Having perfect confidence in my husband, and not wishing to appear vindictive to his parents, I urged him to go, helping my darlings pack. "We clasped each other in a long embrace, and they reluctantly left. I have never seen them since. A few weeks later he issued divorce proceedings against me for incompati bility of temper incompatibility of temper, when a cross word had never passed between us. "They had weaned him from me. I had no money to contest the case; there was nothing left me but to abide by the decision of the courts, which went against me by default. I was even deprived of the custody of the children, but was awarded alimony voluntarily as a balm. I accepted it, for I was very strictly brought up as regards the marital tie, although an American, and consider htm still my husband. Were he in reality otherwise, I should scorn to accept it. If he married again, I should be justified in getting a divorce myself, but not till then. None but those who have passed through such experiences can realize the intensity of "STARS AND STRIPES." 65 my grief, for I was a devoted wife and mother. I could not live in our beautiful little home, where everything reminded me of my loss, so I sold all and moved here, choosing this hotel, because one day a strange thing happened. An odd little letter came from my boy in . 'It was not papa's fault/ he wrote; 'when grandpapa died they would all come back/ That was two years ago and grandpapa still lives; so do I live on and wait, and hope they will yet return, for I still believe Cuthbert loves me. "There," she said, giving a finishing touch to her work, and trying to be cheerful. "I have wound my tale of woe into the coils of your hair. I hope it won't make you unhappy, child," noting my serious face. "Unhappy!" It did not seem possible I could be more so than I was; and yet in a measure, her greater grief had diminished mine. It was my first practical experience of the unstable- ness of the marriage ceremony in "Uncle Sam's" do main, and made a profound impression upon me. It would have been an intense relief to have thrown my self into her arms and wept for both our woes, as I realized how much we could be to each other, but I could not even find words of comfort for her. 66 PANDORA. "Then you do not belie vein this severing of the mari tal tie upon every pretext?" I asked, with an eagerness which must have shown itself upon my countenance, for I had a great regard for her judgment. "No, indeed I do not," she replied with earnestness, leaving no doubt in my mind as to her opinion. Then after a slight pause she said: "As I said before, I am an American, and a loyal one, and for that very reason regret the more the terrible blot these divorce laws, with their attendant miseries, make upon the escut cheon of our fair country." As she spoke she slipped a breakfast shawl I had selected over my head, care fully adjusting its folds about my figure. "Do you believe any man could respect a woman who would divorce herself from a husband, and consent to marrying him because of a greater preference?" I queried, turning my back to her, presumably to ar range the lace about my throat, ostensibly to conceal my features from her solicitous gaze. "I do not see how he could." she said, "and believe in the Bible, where we are strictly enjoined against such things. One may excuse one's self behind the American laws, but only at the sacrifice of G-od's." My first question surprised her; the second seemed to "STARS AND STRIPES." 67 throw a new light upon her regarding me. She made a sudden move as though to draw me towards her, then, as if chilled by my unresponsive exterior, withdrew in perplexity. CHAPTER VII. AN AFFAIR OF THE HEART. "Oh, we're sunk enough here, God knows! But not half so sunk that moments, Sure, tho' seldom, are denied us When the spirit's true endowments Stand out plainly from its false ones, And apprise it of pursuing Or the wrong way or the right way To its triumph or undoing." After breakfast I went in search of a Bible, and turning to the alphabetical index searched, and took note of the following texts: Matthew, v Chap., xxxii verse. Matthew, xix Chap., ix verse. Luke, xvi Chap., xviii verse. I Corinth., vii Chap., x verse. Mark, x Chap., xi and xii. Then transferring them clearly to a sheet of paper, I signed my name, "Pandora Macdonald," and, by way of postscript, wrote with cruel decision 1 (C I am not the heathen my baptismal name would imply, or you would have me think." (69) 70 PANDORA. This I mailed to Kex, and when it had gone I en deavored to solve the problem, what should I do with my life? My days and nights were full, but of nothing but emptiness. As the physician's prescription fails to have the desired effect when oft repeated without an in crease of the dose, so might I find alloyed amusement insufficient to drown a chronic grief. Something was needed to take me entirely out of myself. A faint fragrance of cigarette smoke reached my nostrils, followed simultaneously by a familiar tattoo upon the door, and, without waiting for a summons, Mrs. Beverly Smart, another of the boarders, entered. She patronized me a great deal of late for reasons be yond my comprehension, as it was generally under stood she was no favorite of mine, but at this moment I was glad of any diversion. Dropping unceremoniously into the nearest chair, with a lighted cigarette poised expertly between the second and third fingers of her right hand, she made known her mission. "We are going to have a Bacchante supper to-night," she said, "and some of the men have deputed me to invite you." She flipped an ash from her extinguished cigarette, and striking a match in the orthodox manner continued, between puffs, and with the air of one who AN AFFAIR OF THE HEART. 71 expected and would prefer a negative reply. "Of course you know they are conducted upon the 'go as you please' order, and might shock an overscrupulous person, but/' in an apologetic tone, "they are the best thing in the world to cure the 'blue devils/ and Beverly has been becoming so horribly suspicious lately over nothing, and watching me so closely, I don't believe anything short of champagne or benedictine would bring me to a proper frame of mind. How do you feel about it?" she asked, throwing both legs over an arm of the chair in the utter abandon of one whose position is assured, but born more of a desire to shock me to the utmost limit; then coolly surveying me she awaited the effect of it all. At that time it seemed Mrs. Beverly Smart could not have appeared in a more disparaging light; a bold antithesis to Mrs. Neville, with whom I had lately parted, but I felt piqued at the latter, because, like all I loved, she had misunderstood me. I was at the stage when it would be a relief to smash a window or do harm to something or somebody, and in a humor to be ex asperated at Mrs. Beverly Smart's anticipation of my rejection. Perhaps the same impulse which prompted me to torture the fleet-winged, once-treasured butter flies, when a wild, rebellious child, made me accept with 72 PANDORA. avidity now this invitation to the Bacchante revel, which I knew would be displeasing to both Mrs. Neville and Mrs. Smart, though from different points of view. "What do I think?" I echoed, changing my recum bent position among a nest of pillows, for the first time since her entrance, and looking her defiantly in the face. "I think I shall go; I need a complete change." Mrs. Beverly Smart was a woman of motives; there was a firm purpose in each step she took, a fixed re solve in every action. I saw her plans had been upset; it was my turn to await results. For an instant she looked discomfited, but quickly rallied her forces. "Do you really mean it?" she said, giving me a fur tive glance out of her piercing black eyes, and throwing her cigarette away in order to bend all her energies to the point at issue. "Well," compressing her lips tightly, "I always thought you were a fool not to take more advantage of your opportunities. With all the men in love with you, and no one to interfere, you ought to be happy." I winced at this latter reminder. 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