'&. / Maiden 6c Married Life OF MARY POWELL, Afterwards Mtftrefs Milton. THIRD EDITION. LONDON : Printed for ARTHUR HALL, VIRTUE, & Co. at 25, Pater nojler Row. THE Maiden and Married Life OF M.ARY POWELL, Afterwards Mtftrefs Milton. JOURNALL. For eft Hill, Oxon y May ist, 1643. * * * * SEVENTEENTH Birth- daye. A Gyplie Woman at the Gate woulde faine have tolde my Fortune; but Mother chafed her away, faying me had doubtleffe harboured in fome of the low Houfes in Oxford, and mighte bring us the Plague. Coulde have cried for Vexation ; me had promifed to tell me the Colour of B my 2066118 1643. 1 643- May and. Maiden & Married Life my Hufband's Eyes ; but Mother fays me believes I mall never have one, I am foe fillie. Father gave me a gold Piece. Dear Mother is chafed, methinks, touching this Debt of five hundred Pounds, which Father fays he knows not how to pay. Indeed, he fayd, overnighte, his whole perfonal Eftate amounts to but five hundred Pounds, his Timber and Wood to four hundred more, or thereabouts; and the Tithes and MefTuages of Whateley are no great Matter, being mortgaged for about as much more, and he hath lent Sights of Money to them that won't pay, fo 'tis hard to be thus preft. Poor Father ! 'twas good of him to give me this gold Piece. Coufin Rofe married to Mailer Roger Agnew. Prefent, Father, Mo- ther , and Brother of Rofe ; Father, Mother, of Mary Powell. Mother, Dick, Bob, Harry, and I ; Squire Paice and his Daughter Audrey ; an olde Aunt of M after Roger's, and one of his Couiins, a ftiffe-backed Man with large Eares, and fuch a long Nofe ! Coufin Rofe looked bewtifulle pitie fo faire a Girl mould marry fo olde a Man 'tis thoughte he wants not manie Years of fifty. New Misfortunes in the Poultrie Yarde. Poor Mother's Loyalty can- not ftand the Demands for her beft Chickens, Ducklings, &c., for the Ufe of his Majefty's Officers fince the King hath beene in Oxford. She accufeth my Father of having beene wonne over by a few faire Speeches to be more of a Royalift than his natural Temper inclineth him to ; which, of courfe, he will not admit. Whole 1643. 1643- May 8th. Maiden & Married Life Whole Day taken up in a Vifit to Rofe, now a Week married, and growne quite matronlie already. We reached Sheepfcote about an Hour be- fore Noone. A long, broade, ftrait Walke of green Turf, planted with Hollyoaks, Sunflowers, &c., and fome earlier Flowers alreadie in Bloom, led up to the rufticall Porch of a truly farm-like Houfe, with low gable Roofs, a long lattice Window on either Side the Doore, and three Cafements above. Such, and no more, is Rofe's Houfe ! But {he is happy, for me came running forthe, foe foone as me hearde Clover's Feet, and helped me from my Saddle all fmiling, tho' me had not expected to fee us. We had Curds and Creame ; and me wifhed it were the Time of Strawberries, for me fayd they had large Beds ; and then my Father and the Boys went of Mary Powell. went forthe to looke for Mafter Agnew. Then Rofe took me up to her Chamber, finging as me went; I and the long, low Room was fweet ! with Flowers. Sayd I, " Rofe, to " be Miftrefs of this pretty Cottage, " 'twere hardlie amirTe to marry a " Man as olde as Mafter Roger." " Olde ! " quoth me, " deare Moll, " you muft not deeme him olde ; " why, he is but forty-two ; and am " not I twenty-three ? " She lookt foe earnefte and hurte, that I coulde not but falle a laughing. Mother gone to Sandford. She hopes to get Uncle John to lend Father this Money. Father fays me may try. 'Tis harde to difcourage her with an ironicalle Smile, when me is doing alle me can, and more than manie Women woulde, to help Father in his Difficultie ; but fuche, me 1643. May 9th. 1643. Maiden & Married Life me fayth fomewhat bitterlie, is the Lot of our Sex. She bade Father mind that fhe had brought him three thoufand Pounds, and afkt what had come of them. Anfwered; helped to fille the Mouths of nine healthy Children, and flop the Mouth of an eafie Hufband; foe, with a Kifs, made it up. I have the Keys, and am left MiftrefTe of alle, to my greate Con- tentment ; but the Children clamour for Sweetmeats, and Father fayth, " Remember, Moll, Difcretion is the " better Part of Valour." After Mother had left, went into the Paddock, to feed the Colts with Bread ; and while they were putting their Nofes into Robin s Pockets, Dick brought out the two Ponies, and fet me on one of them, and we had a mad Scamper through the Meadows and down the Lanes ; I leading. Jufl at the Turne of Hoi- ford's of Mary Powell. ford's Clofe, came fliorte upon a Gen- tleman walking under the Hedge, clad in a fober, genteel Suit, and of moft beautifulle Countenance, with Hair like a Woman's, of a lovely pale brown, long and iilky, falling over his Shoulders. I nearlie went over him, for Clover s hard Forehead knocked agaynft his Cheft ; but he ftoode it like a Rock ; and lookinge firfte at me and then at Dick, he fmiled and fpoke to my Brother, who feemed to know him, and turned about and walked by us, fometimes flroaking Clover s maggy Mane. I felte a little afhamed ; for Dick had fett me on the Poney jufl as I was, my Gown fomewhat too fhorte for riding : however, I drewe up my Feet and let Clover nibble a little Grafle, and then got rounde to the neare Side, our new Companion ftille between us. He offered me fome 1643. 1643. Maiden & Married Life fome wild Flowers, and afkt me theire Names ; and when I tolde them, he fayd I knew more than he did, though he accounted him- felfe a prettie fayre Botanifte : and we went on thus, talking of the Herbs and Simples in the Hedges ; and I fayd how prettie fome of theire Names were, and that, methought, though Adam had named alle the Animals in Paradife, perhaps Eve had named alle the Flowers. He lookt earneftlie at me, on this, and muttered " prettie." Then Dick afkt of him News from London, and he fpoke, methought, refervedlie ; ever and anon turning his bright, thoughtfulle Eyes on me. At length, we parted at the Turn of the Lane. I afkt Dick who he was, and he told me he was one Mr. John Milton, the Party to whom Father owed five hundred Pounds. He was the Sonne of of Mary Powell. of a Buckinghamjhire Gentleman, he added, well connected, and very fcholaric, but affected towards the Parliament. His Grandfire, a zea- lous Papifte, formerly lived in Oxon, and disinherited the Father of this Gentleman for abjuring the Romifo Faith. When I found how faire a Gen- tleman was Father's Creditor, I be- came the more interefted in deare Mother's SuccerTe. Dick began to harpe on another Ride to Sheepfcote this Morning, and perfuaded Father to let him have the bay Mare, foe he and I ftarted at aboute Ten o' the Clock. Arrived at Matter Agnews Doore, found it open, no one in Parlour or Studdy; foe Dick tooke the Horfes rounde, and then we went ftraite thro' the Houfe, into the Garden behind, which 1643. May 1 3th. 10 Maiden & Married Life which is on a riling Ground, with pleached Alleys and turfen Walks, and a Peep of the Church through the Trees. A Lad tolde us his Miftrefs was with the Bees, foe we walked towards the Hives ; and, from an Arbour hard by, hearde a Murmur, though not of Bees, iffu- ing. In this rufticall Bowre, found Roger Agnew reading to Rofe and to Mr. Milton. Thereupon enfued manie cheerfulle Salutations, and Rofe propofed returning to the Houfe, but Mailer Agnew fayd it was pleafanter in the Bowre, where was Room for alle ; foe then Rofe offered to take me to her Chamber to lay afide my Hoode, and promifed to fend a Jun- kett into the Arbour; whereon Mr. Agnew fmiled at Mr. Milton, and fayd fomewhat of " neat-handed " PhilKs." As we went alonge, I tolde Rofe I of Mary Powell. I had feene her Gueft once before, and thought him a comely, pleafant Gentleman. She laught, and fayd, " Pleafant ? why, he is one of the " greateft Scholars of our Time, and " knows more Languages than you " or I ever hearde of." I made Anfwer, " That may be, and yet " might not enfure his being plea- " fant, but rather the contrary, for " I cannot reade Greeke and Latin, " Rofe, like you." Quoth Rofe, " but you can reade Engltfh, and he " hath writ fome of the lovelieft " ILngliJh Verfes you ever hearde, " and hath brought us a new Com- " pofure this Morning, which Roger, " being his olde College Friend, was " difcuffing with him, to my greate " Pleafure, when you came. After " we have eaten the Junkett, he " mall beginne it again." " By no " Means," faid I, "for I love Talking " more 1 1 1643. 12 1643. Maiden & Married Life " more than Reading." However, it was not foe to be, for Rqfe woulde not be foyled ; and as it woulde not have been good Manners to decline the Hearinge in Prefence of the Poet, I was conflrayned to fupprefTe a fecret Yawne, and feign Attention, though, Truth to fay, it foone wan- dered ; and, during the laft halfe Hour, I fat in a compleat Dreame, tho' not unpleafant one. Roger having made an End, 'twas diverting to heare him commending the Piece unto the Author, who as gravely accepted it; yet, with Nothing fulle- fome about the one, or mifproud about the other. Indeed, there was a fedate Sweetneffe in the Poet's Wordes as well as Lookes ; and mortlie, waiving the Difcuflion of his owne Compofures, he beganne to talke of thofe of other Men, as Shakfpeare, Spenfer, Cow ley , Ben Jori/bn, of Mary Powell. Jonfon, and of Taffo, and Taffo's Friend the Marquis of Villa, whome, it appeared, Mr. Milton had Know- ledge of in Italy. Then he afktme, woulde I not willingly have feene the Country of Romeo and Juliet, and preft to know whether I loved Poetry; but finding me loath to tell, fayd he doubted not I preferred Ro- mances, and that he had read manie, and loved them dearly too. I fayd, I loved Shakfpeares Plays better than Sidney's Arcadia; on which he cried " Righte," and drew nearer to me, and woulde have talked at greater length ; but, knowing from Rofe how learned he was, I feared to mew him I was a fillie Foole ; foe, like a fillie Foole, held my Tongue. Dinner ; Eggs, Bacon, roafl Ribs of Lamb, Spinach, Potatoes, fa- voury Pie, a Brentford Pudding, and Cheefecakes. What a pretty Houfewife 1643. 1643. Maiden & Married Life Houfewife Rofe is ! Roger's plain Hofpitalitie and fcholaric Difcourfe appeared to much Advantage. He aflct of News from Paris ; and Mr. Milton fpoke much of the Swedijh AmbaiTadour, Dutch by Birth; a Man renowned for his Learning, Magnanimity, and Misfortunes, of whome he had feene much. He tolde Rofe and me how this Mifter Van der Groote had beene unjuftlie cafte into Prifon by his Countrymen ; and how his good Wife had mared his Captivitie, and had tried to get his Sentence reverfed; failing which, ihe contrived his Efcape in a big Cheft, which me pretended to be full of heavie olde Bookes. Mr. Milton concluded with the Excla- mation, "Indeede, there never was "fuch a Woman;" on which, deare Roger, whome I beginne to love, quoth, " Oh yes, there are manie " fuch, of Mary Powell. (t fuch, we have two at Table " now." Whereat, Mr. Milton fmiled. At Leave-taking prefTed Mr. Ag- new and Rofe to come and fee us foone; and Dick afkt Mr. Milton to fee the Bowling Greene. Ride Home, delightfulle. Thought, when I woke this Morn- ing, I had been dreaminge of St. Paul let down the Wall in a Bafket; but founde, on more clofely examin- ing the Matter, 'twas Grotius carried down the Ladder in a Cheft; and methought I was his Wife, leaninge from the Window above, and crying to the Souldiers, "Have a Care, have a Care ! " 'Tis certayn I fhoulde have betraied him by an Over-anxietie. Refolved to give Father a Sheepf- cote Dinner, but Margery affirmed the Haunch woulde no longer keepe, fo 1643. Slay 14.1!). i6 1643. Maiden & Married Life fo was forced to have it dreft, though meaninge to have kept it for Com- panie. Little Kate, who had been out alle the Morning, came in with her Lap full of Butter-burs, the which I was glad to fee, as Mother efteemes them a fovereign Remedie 'gainft the Plague, which is like to be rife in Oxford this Summer, the Citie being fo overcrowded on ac- count of his MajefHe. While laying them out on the Stille-room Floor, in burfls Robin to fay Mr. Agne*w and Mr. Milton were with Father at the Bowling Greene, and woulde dine here. Soe was glad Margery had put down the Haunch. 'Twas paft One o' the Clock, however, be- fore it coulde be fett on Table ; and I had juft run up to pin on my Car- nation Knots, when I hearde them alle come in difcourfing merrilie. At Dinner Mr. Milton afkt Robin of of Mary Powell. 1 7 of his Studdies ; and I was in Payne for the deare Boy, knowing him to be better affected to his out-doore Recreations than to his Booke ; but he anfwered boldlie he was in Ovid, and I lookt in Mr. Milton s Face to gueffe was that goode Scholarfhip or no ; but he turned it towards my Father, and fayd he was trying an Experiment on two young Nephews of his owne, whether the reading thofe Authors that treate of phyfical Subjects mighte not advantage them more than the Poets ; whereat my Father jetted with him, he being himfelfe one of the Fraternitie he feemed to defpife. But he uphelde his Argumente fo bravelie, that Father liftened in earnefte Silence. Meantime, the Cloth being drawne, and I in Feare of remaining over long, was avifed to withdrawe my- felfe earlie, Robin following, and c begging i8 Maiden & Married Life i6 43 . begging me to goe downe to the Fifh-ponds. Afterwards alle the others joyned us, and we fate on the Steps till the Sun went down, when, the Horfes being broughte round, our Guefts tooke Leave without returning to the Houfe. Father walked thoughtfullie Home with me, leaning on my Shoulder, and fpake little. May 1 5th. After writing the above lafl Night, in my Chamber, went to Bed and had a moft heavenlie Dreame. Me- thoughte it was brighte, brighte Moonlighte, and I was walking with Mr. Milton on a Terrace, not our Terrace, but in fome outlandim Place ; and it had Flights and Flights of green marble Steps, defcending, I cannot tell how farre, with ftone Figures and Vafes on everie one. We went downe and downe thefe Steps, of Mary Powell. Steps, till we came to a faire Piece of Water, flill in the Moonlighte ; and then, methoughte, he woulde be taking Leave, and fayd much aboute Abfence and Sorrowe, as tho' we had knowne cache other fome Space ; and alle that he fayd was delightfulle to heare. Of a fuddain we hearde Cries, as of Dif- treffe, in a Wood that came quite down to the Water's Edge, and Mr. Milton fayd, " Hearken ! " and then, " There is fome one being flaine in " the Woode, I muft goe to refcue "him;" and foe, drewe his Sword and ran off. Meanwhile, the Cries continued, but I did not feeme to ' mind them much ; and, looking ftedfaftlie downe into the cleare Water, coulde fee to an immeafur- able Depth, and beheld, oh, rare ! Girls fitting on gliilening Rocks, far downe beneathe, combing and braiding 1643. 2o Maiden & Married Life 1643 braiding their brighte Hair, and talking and laughing, onlie I coulde not heare aboute what. And theire Kirtles were like fpun Glafs, and theire Bracelets Coral and Pearl; and I thought it the faireil Sight that Eyes coulde fee. But, alle at once, the Cries in the Wood af- frighted them, for they ftarted, looked upwards and alle aboute, and began fwimming thro' the cleare Water fo fail, that it became troubled and thick, and I coulde fee them noe more. Then I was aware that the Voices in the Wood were of Dick and Harry, calling for me ; and I foughte to anfwer, "Here!" but my Tongue was heavie. Then I commenced running towards them, through ever fo manie greene Paths, in the Wood ; but ilill, we coulde never meet ; and I began to fee grinning Faces, neither of Man nor Beafte of Mary Powell. Beafte, peeping at me through the Trees ; and one and another of them called me by Name ; and in greate Feare and Paine I awoke ! * * # * Strange Things are Dreames. Dear Mother thinks much of them, and fayth they oft portend coming Events. My Father holdeth the Opinion that they are rather made up of what hath alreadie come to pafTe ; but furelie naught like this Dreame of mine hath in anie Part befallen me hithertoe ? * * * * What ftrange Fable or Mafque were they reading that Day at Sheepfcote ? I mind not. Too much bufied of late to write, though much hath happened which I woulde fain remember. Dined at Shot over yefterday. Met Mother, who is coming Home in a Day or two, but helde fhort Speech with me 21 1643. May zoth. 22 1643. Maiden & Married Life me afide concerning Houfewifery. The Agnews there, of courfe : alfoe Mr. Milton, whom we have feene continuallie, lately ; and I know not how it fhoulde be, but he feemeth to like me. Father affects him much, but Mother loveth him not. She hath feene little of him : per- haps the lefs the better. Ralph Hewlett, as ufuall, forward in his rough Endeavours to pleafe ; but, though no Scholar, I have yet Senfe enough to prefer Mr. Milton s Dif- courfe to his. * * * * I wifh I were fonder of Studdy ; but, ilnce it can- not be, what need to vex ? Some are born of one Mind, fome of another. Rofe was alwaies for her Booke ; and, had Rofe beene no Scholar, ^Ar.Agnew woulde, may be, never have given her a fecond Thoughte : but alle are not of the fame Way of thinking. * * * * A few Lines received from of Mary Powell. from Mother s " fpoilt Boy," as Fa- ther hath called Brother Bill, ever lince he went a foldiering. Blurred and mis-fpelt as they are, me will prize them. Trulie, we are none of us grate Hands at the Pen ; 'tis well I make this my Copie-booke. * * * * Oh, ftrange Event! Can this be HappinefTe ? Why, then, am I foe feared, foe mazed, foe prone to Weeping ? I woulde that Mother were here. Lord have Mercie on me a iinfulle, fillie Girl, and guide my Steps arighte. # * * * Jt feemes like a Dreame, (I have done noughte but dreame of late, I think,) my going along the matted Paffage, and hearing Voices in my Father's Chamber, juft as my Hand was on the Latch; and my withdrawing my Hand, and going foftlie away, though I never paufed at 2 3 1643. May 22(1. l6 43- Maiden & Married Life at difturbing him before ; and, after I had beene a full Houre in the Stille Room, turning over ever foe manie Trays full of dried Herbs and Flower-leaves, hearing him come forthe and call, " Moll, deare Moll, "where are you?" with I know not what of flrange in the Tone of his Voice ; and my running to him haftilie, and his drawing me into his Chamber, and clofing the Doore. Then he takes me round the Waifte, and remains quite filent awhile ; I gazing on him fo ftrangelie ! and at length, he fays with a Kind of Sigh, " Thou art indeed but young yet ! " fcarce feventeen, and frefh, as " Mr. Milton fays, as the earlie May ; " too tender, forfooth, to leave us " yet, fweet Child ! But what wilt " fay, Moll, when I tell thee that a " well-efteemed Gentleman, whom " as yet indeed I know too little of, " hath of Mary Powell. " hath craved of me Accefs to the " Houfe as one that woulde win " your Favour ?" Thereupon, fuch a fuddain Faint- nefs of the Spiritts overtooke me, (a Thing I am noe way fubject to,) as that I fell down in a Swound at Father's Feet ; and when I came to myfelfe agayn, my Hands and Feet feemed full of Prickles, and there was a Humming as of Roje's Bees, in mine Ears. Lett ice and Margery were tending of me, and Father watching me full of Care ; but foe foone as he faw me open mine Eyes, he bade the Maids ftand alide, and fayd, ftooping over me, " Enough, " dear Moll ; we will talk noe more " of this at prefent." " Onlie ju'ft " te'll me," quoth I, in a Whifper, " who it is." " GuefTe," fayd he. " I cannot," I foftlie replied ; and, with the Lie, came fuch a Rum of Blood 2 5 1643. 26 Maiden & Married Life 1643. Blood to my Cheeks as betraied me. " I am fure you have though," fayd deare Father, gravelie, " and I neede " not fay it is Mr. Milton, of whome " I know little more than you doe, " and that is not enough. On the " other Hand, Roger Agnew fayth " that he is one of whome we " can never know too much, and " there is fomewhat about him " which inclines me to believe it." " What will Mother fay ? " inter- rupted I. Thereat Father s Coun- tenance changed ; and he haftllie anfwered, " Whatever me likes : I " have an Anfwer for her, and a " Queftion too ; " and abruptlie left me, bidding me keepe myfelfe quiet. But can I ? Oh, no ! Father hath fett a Stone rolling, unwitting of its Courfe. It hath proftrated me in the firft Inftance, and will, I mif- doubt, hurt my Mother. Father is bold of Mary Powell. bold enow in her Abfence, but when me comes back will leave me to face her Anger alone ; or elfe, make fuch a Stir to mew that he is not governed by a Woman, as wille make Things worfe. Meanwhile, how woulde I have them ? Am I moil pleafed or payned ? difmayed or flattered ? Indeed, I know not. * # * * i am f oe forry to have fwooned. Needed I have done it, merelie to heare there was one who foughte my Favour ? Aye, but one foe wife ! fo thoughtfulle ! fo unlike me ! Bedtime ; fame Daye. # * * * Who knoweth what a Daye will bring forth ? After writing the above, I fate like one ftupid, ruminating on I know not what, except on the Unlikelihood that one foe wife woulde trouble himfelfe to feeke for aught and yet fail to win. After 27 1643. 28 Maiden & Married Life 1643- After abiding a long Space in mine owne Chamber, alle below feeming ftill, I began to wonder moulde we dine alone or. not, and to have a hundred hot and cold Fitts of Hope and Feare. Thought I, if Mr. Milton comes, affuredlie I cannot goe down ; but yet I muft ; but yet I will not ; but yet the beft will be to conduct myfelfe as though Nothing had happened ; and, as he feems to have left the Houfe long ago, maybe he hath returned to Sheepfcote, or even to London. Oh that London ! Shall I indeede ever fee it ? and the rare Shops, and the Play-houfes, and Paul's, and the 'Towre ? But what and if that ever comes to pafs ? Muft I leave Home ? dear Foreft Hill? and Father and Mother, and the Boys ? more efpeciallie Robin ? Ah ! but Father will give me a long Time to think of it. He will, and muft. Then of Mary Powell. Then Dinner-time came ; and, with Dinner-time, Uncle Hewlett and Ralph, Squire Pake and Mr. Milton. We had a huge Sirloin, foe no Feare of fhort Commons. I was not ill pleafed to fee foe manie : it gave me an Excufe for holding my Peace, but I coulde have wifhed for another Woman. However, Father never thinks of that, and Mother will foone be Home. After Dinner the elder Men went to the Bowling-greene with Dick and Ralph; the Boys to the Fim-ponds ; and, or ever I was aware, Mr. Milton was walking with me on the Terrace. My Dreame came foe forcibly to Mind, that my Heart feemed to leap into my Mouth ; but he kept away from the Fim-ponds, and from Leave- taking, and from his morning Dif- courfe with my Father, at leaft for 29 30 Maiden & Married Life 1643- for awhile ; but fome Way he got round to it, and fayd foe much, and foe well, that, after alle my Father's bidding me keepe quiete and take my Time, and mine owne Refolu- tion to think much and long, he never refled till he had changed the whole Appearance of Things, and made me promife to be his, wholly and trulie. And oh ! I feare I have been too quickly wonne ! 230. May 23d. At leafte, fo fayeth the Calendar ; but with me it hath beene trulie an April Daye, alle Smiles and Teares. And now my Spiritts are foe perturbed and difmaid, as that I know not whether to weepe or no, for methinks crying would re- lieve me. At firft waking this Morning my Mind was elated at the Fallitie of my Mother's Notion, that no Man of Senfe woulde think me of Mary Powell. me worth the having ; and foe I got up too proude, I think, and came down too vain, for I had fpent an unufuall Time at the Glalfe. My Spiritts, alfoe, were foe unequall, that the Boys took Notice of it, and it feemed as though I coulde breathe nowhere but out of Doors ; fo the Children and I had a rare Game of Play in the Home-clofe ; but ever and anon I kept looking towards the Road and liftening for Horfes' Feet, till Robin fayd, " One would think " the King was coming : " but at laft came Mr. Milton, quite another Way, walking through the Fields with huge Strides. Kate faw him firfte, and tolde me ; and then fayd, What makes you look foe pale ? " ***** We fate a good Space under the Hawthorn Hedge on the Brow of the Hill, liftening to the Mower's Scythe, 3 1 1643. 3 2 Maiden & Married Life 1643- Scythe, and the Song of Birds, which feemed enough for him, without talking ; and as he fpake not, I helde my Peace, till, with the Sun in my Eyes, I was like to drop afleep ; which, as his own Face was from me, and towards the Landfkip, he noted not. I was juft aiming, for Mirthe's Sake, to fteale away, when he fuddainlie turned about and fell to fpeaking of rurall Life, Happi- nefTe, Heaven, and fuch like, in a Kind of Rapture ; then, with his Elbow half raifing him from the Grafs, lay looking at me ; then commenced humming or finging I know not what Strayn, but 'twas of ' begli Occhi ' and ' Chioma aurata ; ' and he kept fmiling the while he fang. After a Time we went In-doors ; and then came my firfle Pang : for Father founde out how I had pledged myfelfe ofMzry Powell. myfelfe overnighte; and for a Mo- ment looked foe grave, that my Heart mifgave me for having beene foe haftie. However, it foone paff- ed off; deare Father's Countenance cleared, and he even feemed merrie at Table; and foon after Dinner alle the Party difperfed fave Mr. Milton, who loitered with me on the Terrace. After a fhort Silence he exclaimed, " How good is our " God to us in alle his Gifts! For " Inftance, in this Gift of Love, " whereby had he withdrawn from " vifible Nature a thoufand of its " glorious Features and gay Colour- " ings, we fhoulde ftille pofftfs,from " within, the Means of throwing " over her clouded Face an entirelie " different Hue! while as it is, what " was pleafing before now pleafeth "more than ever! Is it not foe, " fweet Moll? May I exprefs thy D " Feelings 33 1643. 34 1643. Maiden & Married Life " Feelings as well as mine own, "unblamed? or am I too adven- " turous? You are filent; well, " then, let me believe that we think " alike, and that the Emotions of " the few lafle Hours have given " fuch an Impulfe to alle that is " high, and fweete, and deepe, and " pure, and holy in our innermofte " Hearts, as that we feeme now " onlie firfle to tafte the Life of " Life, and to perceive how much " nearer Earth is to Heaven than " we thought! Is it foe? Is it not "foe?" and I was conftrayned to fay, " Yes," at I fcarcelie knew what; grudginglie too, for I feared having once alreadie fayd " Yes" too foone. But he faw nought amiffe, for he was expecting nought amilTe; foe went on, moft like Truth and Love that Lookes could fpeake or Words founde : " Oh, I know "it, of Mary Powell. " it, I feel it: henceforthe there " is a Life referved for us in which " Angels may fympathize. For this " moft excellent Gift of Love mall " enable us to read together the " whole Booke of Sanctity and Vir- " tue, and emulate eache other in "carrying it into Practice; and as " the wife Magians kept theire Eyes " fteadfaftlie fixed on the Star, and " followed it righte on, through " rough and fmoothe, foe we, with " this bright Beacon, which indeed " is fet on Fire of Heaven, mall " pafs on through the peacefull " Studdies, furmounted Adverlities, " and viclorious Agonies of Life, " ever looking fleadfaftlie up!" Alle this, and much more, as tedious to heare as to write, did I liften to, firfte with flagging Atten- tion, next with concealed Weari- nelTe ; and as WearinerTe, if in- dulged, 35 1643. 1643. Maiden & Married Life dulged, never is long concealed, it foe chanced, by Ill-luck, that Mr. Milton, fuddainlie turning his Eyes from Heaven upon poor me,caughte, I can fcarcelie exprelTe how flighte, an Indication of Difcomforte in my Face ; and inftantlie a Cloud crofTed his owne, though as thin as that through which the Sun mines while it floats over him. Oh, 'twas not of a Moment ! and yet in that Moment we feemed cache to have feene the other, though but at a Glance, under new Circumftances : as though two Perfons at a Mafquerade had juft removed their Mafques and put them on agayn. This gave me my feconde Pang: I felt I had given him Payn; and though he made as though he forgot it directly, and I tooke Payns to make him forget it, I coulde never be quite fure whether he had. My Powell. Spiritts were foe darned by this, and by learning his Age to be foe much more than I had deemed it, (for he is thirty-five ! who coulde have thoughte it ?) that I had, thenceforthe, the Aire of being much more difcreete and pen- five than belongeth to my Nature; whereby he was, perhaps, well pleafed. As I became more grave he became more gay; foe that we met cache other, as it were, half- way, and became righte pleafant. If his Countenance were comely before, it is quite heavenlie now ; and yet I queftion whether my Love increafeth as rapidlie as my Feare. Surelie my Folly will prove as diftaftefull to him, as his over- much Wifdom to me. The Dread of it hath alarmed me alreadie. What has become, even now, of alle my gay Vifions of Marriage, and 37 1643. 1643- May 24th. Maiden & Married Life and London, and the Play-houfes, and the Towre? They have faded away thus earlie, and in their Place comes a Foreboding of I can fcarce fay what. I am as if a Child, receiving from fome olde Fairy the Gift of what feemed a fayre Doll's Houfe, moulde haflilie open the Doore thereof, and ftarte back at beholding nought within but a huge Cavern, deepe, high, and vafte; in parte glittering with glorious Chryf- tals, and the Reft hidden in obfcure DarkneiTe. Deare Rofe came this Morning. I flew forthe to welcome her, and as I drew near, me lookt upon me with fuch a Kind of Awe as that I could not forbeare laughing. Mr. Milton having flept at Sheepfcote, had made her privy to our Engage- ment; forindeede,he and Nlr.Agnew are , of Mary Powell. are fuch Friends, he will keep No- thing from him. Thus Rofe heares it before my owne Mother, which moulde not be. When we had entered my Chamber, me embraced me once and agayn, and feemed to think foe much of my uncommon Fortune, that I beganne to think more of it myfelfe. To heare her talke of Mr. Milton one would have fuppofed her more in Love with him than I. Like a Bookworm as me is, me fell to prayfing his Compofures. " Oh, the leafte I care for in him is "his Verting," quoth I; and from that Moment a Spiritt of Mifchief tooke PofTemon of me, to do a thoufand heedlefle, ridiculous Things throughoute the Day, to mew Rofe how little I fet by the Opinion of foe wife a Man. Once or twice Mr. Milton lookt earneftlie and queftion- inglie at me, but I heeded him not. Difcourfe 39 1643. Maiden & Married Life 1643. * * * * Difcourfe at Table graver and lefs pleafant, methoughte, than heretofore. Mr. Eujire having dropt in, was avifed to afk Mr. Milton why, having had an univerfity Education, he had not entered the Church. He replied, drylie enough, becaufe he woulde not fubfcribe himfelfe Slave to anie Formularies of Men's mak- ing. I faw Father bite his Lip; and Roger Agnew mildly obferved, he thought him wrong; for that it was not for an Individual to make Rules for another Individual, but yet that the generall Voice of the Wife and Good, removed from the pettie Prejudices of private Feeling, mighte pronounce authoritativelie wherein an Individual was righte or wrong, and frame Laws to keepe him in the righte Path. Mr. Milton replyed, that manie Fallibles could no more make up an Infallible than manie of Mary Powell. manie Finites could make an Infinite. Mr. Agnew rejoyned, that ne'erthe- leffe, an Individual who oppofed himfelfe agaynfl the generall Cur- rent of the Wife and Good, was, leafte of alle, likelie to be in the Right ; and that the Limitations of human Intellect which made the Judgment of manie wife Men liable to Qu.efr.ion, certainlie made the Judgment of anle wife Man, felf- dependent, more quefHonable frill. Mr. Milton fhortlie replied that there were Particulars in the required Oaths which made him unable to take them without Perjurie. And foe, an End : but 'twas worth a World to fee Rofe looking foe anxiouflie from the one Speaker to the other, defirous that cache mould be victorious ; and I was forry that it lafled not a little longer. As Rofe and I tooke our Way to the Maiden & Married Life I<5 43- the Summer-houfe, fhe put her Arm round me, faying, " How charming " is divine Philofophie ! " I coulde not helpe afking if me did not meane how charming was the Phi- lofophie of one particular Divine ? Soe then me difcourfed with me of Things more feemlie for Women than Philofophie or Divinitie either. Onlie, when Mr. Agnew and Mr. Milton joyned us, fhe woulde alke them to repeat one Piece of Poetry after another, beginning with Ca- rews " He 'who loves a rojle Cheeke, Or a coral Lip admires, " And crying at the End of eache, " Is not that lovely ? Is not that " divine ? " I franklie fayd I liked none of them foe much as fome Mr. Agnew had recited, concluding with " Mortals of Mary Powell. " Mortals that would follow me, Love Virtue : flie alone is free." Whereon Mr. Milton furprifed me with a fudden Kifs, to the immo- derate Mirthe of Ro/e, who fayd I coulde not have looked more dif- compofed had he pretended he was the Author of thofe Verfes. I after- wards found he was ; but I think me laught more than there was neede. We have ever been coniidered a fufficientlie religious Familie : that is, we goe regularly to Church on Sabbaths and Prayer-dayes, and keepe alle the Farts and Feftivalles. But Mr. Milton s Devotion hath at- tayned a Pitch I can neither imitate nor even comprehende. The fpi- rituall World feemeth to him not onlie reall, but I may almofle fay vifible. For Inftance, he tolde Rofe, it 43 1643. 44 Maiden & Married Life i6 43- i it appears, that on Tuefday Nighte, | (that is the fame Evening I had promifed to be his,) as he went homewards to his Farm-lodging, he fancied the Angels whifperinge in his Eares, and linging over his Head, and that inftead of going to his Bed like a reafonable Being, he lay down on the Grafs, and gazed on the fweete, pale Moon till me fett, and then on the bright Starres till he feemed to fee them moving in a flowe, folemn Dance, to the Words, " How glorious is our God!" And alle about him, he faid, he knew, tho' he coulde not fee them, were fpirituall Beings repairing the Ravages of the Day on the Flowers, amonge the Trees, and Graffe, and Hedges ; and he believed 'twas onlie the Filme that originall Sin had fpread over his Eyes, that prevented his feeing them. 1 am thankful for this of Mary Powell. this fame Filme, I cannot abide Fairies, and Witches, and Ghofts ugh ! I fhudder even to write of them ; and were it onlie of the more harmlefle Sort, one woulde never have the Comforte of think- inge to be alone. I fearj& Church- yardes and dark Corners of alle Kinds ; more efpeciallie Spiritts ; and there is onlie one I would even wifh to fee at my braveft, when deepe Love cafteth out Feare ; and that is of Sifter Anne, whome I never aflbciate with the Worme and Winding 7 fheete. Oh no ! I think Jhe, at leafte, dwells amonge the Starres, having fprung ftraite up into Lighte and BlifTe the Moment me put off Mortalitie ; and if me, why not others? Are Adam and Abraham alle thefe Yeares in the unconfcious Tomb ? Theire Bodies, but furelie not their Spiritts ? elfe, why 45 1643. 4 6 1643. Maiden & Married Life why dothe Chriji fpeak of Lazarus lying in Abraham's Bofom, while the Brothers of Dives are yet riot- ouflie living ? Yet what becomes of the Daye of generall Judgment, if fome be thus pre-judged ? I muft afke Mr. Milton, yes, I thinke I can finde it in my Heart to afke him about this in fome folemn, ilille Hour, and perhaps he will fett at Reft manie Doubts and Mifgivings that at fundrie Times trouble me ; being foe wife a Man. Bedtime. * * * * Glad to fleale - away from the noifie Companie in the Supper-roome, (comprifing fome of Father's Fellow-magiftrates,) I went down with Robin and Kate to the Fim-ponds ; it was fcarce Sunfet : and there, while we threw Crumbs to the Fifh and watched them come to of Mary Powell. to the Surface, were followed, or ever we were aware, by Mr. Milton, who fate down on the ftone Seat, drew Robin between his Knees, flroked his Haire, and afkt what we were talking about. Robin fayd I had beene telling them a fairie Story ; and Mr. Milton obferved that was an infinite Improvement on the jangling, puzzle-headed Prating of Country Juftices, and wifhed I woulde tell it agayn. But I was afrayd. But Robin had no Feares; foe tolde the Tale roundlie ; onlie he forgot the End. Soe he found his Way backe to the Middle, and feemed likelie to make it laft alle Night; onlie Mr. Milton fayd he feemed to have got into the Laby- rinth of Crete, and he muft for Pitie's Sake give him the Clew. Soe he finimed Robin s Story, and then tolde another, a moft lovelie one, 47 1643. 4 8 1643. Maiden & Married Life one, of Ladies, and Princes, and Enchanters, and a brazen Horfe, and he fayd the End of that Tale had been cut off too, by Reafon the Writer had died before he finifhed it. But Robin cryed, " Oh ! finifh " this too," and hugged and kift him ; foe he did ; and methoughte the End was better than the Be- ginninge. Then he fayd, " Now, " fweet Moll, you have onlie fpoken " this Hour part, by your Eyes ; " and we muft heare your pleafant " Voice." " An Hour ? " cries Robin. " Where are all the red " Clouds gone, then ? " quoth Mr. Milton, " and what Bufinefs hathe " the Moon yonder ? " " Then we " muft go Indoors," quoth I. But they cried " No," and Robin helde me faft, and Mr. Milton fayd I might know even by the diftant Sounds of ill-governed Merriment that we were of Mary Powell. were winding up the Week's Ac- counts of Joy and Care more con- fiftentlie where we were than we coulde doe in the Houfe. And indeede juft then I hearde my Fa- f/ier'sVoice fwelling a noiiie Chorus ; and hoping Mr. Milton did not dif- tinguifh it, I afkt him if he loved Mufick. He anfwered, foe much that it was Miferie for him to hear anie that was not of the befle. I fecretlie refolved he mould never heare mine. He added, he was come of a muficalle Familie, and that his Father not onlie fang well, but played finely on the Viol and Organ. Then he fpake of the fweet Mufick in Italy, untill I longed to be there ; but I tolde him Nothing in its Way ever pleafed me more than to heare the Chorifters of Magdalen College ufher in May Day by chaunting a Hymn at the Top of the 49 50 Maiden & Married Life 1643. the Church Towre. Difcourfing of this and that, we thus fate a good While ere we returned to the Houfe. * * * * Coming out of Church, he woulde ihun the common Field, where the Villagery led up "theire Sports, faying, he deemed Quoit- playing and the like to be unfuitable Recreations on a Daye whereupon the Lord had reftricted us from fpeakinge our own Words, and thinking our own (that is, fecular) Thoughts : and that he believed the Law of God in this Particular woulde foone be the Law of the Land, for Parliament woulde mortlie put down Sunday Sports. I afkt, " What, the "King's Parliament at Oxford?' He anfwered, " No ; the Country's " Parliament at Weftminfter" I fayd, I was forrie, for manie poore hard- working Men had no other Holiday. He of Mary Powell. He fayd, another Holiday woulde be given them ; and that whether or no, we muft not connive at Evil, which we doe in permitting an holy Daye to fink into a Holiday. I fayd, but was it not the 'Jewijh Law which had made fuch Reftrictions ? He fayd, yes, but that Chrift came not to deftroy the moral Law, of which Sabbath-keeping was a Part, and that even its naturall FitnerTe for the bodily Welfare of Man and Beaft was fuch as no wife Legiflator would abolim or abufe it, even had he no Confideration for our fpiritual and immortal Part : and that 'twas a well-known Fact that Beafts of Bur- then, which had not one Daye of Reft in feven, did leffe Worke in the End. As for oure Soules, he fayd, they required theire fpiritual Meales as much as our Bodies re- quired theires ; and even poore, rufticall 1643. 5 2 Monday. Maiden & Married Life rufticall Clownes who coulde not reade, mighte nourifh their better Parts by an holie Paufe, and by looking within them, and around them, and above them. I felt in- clined to tell him that long Sermons alwaies feemed to make me love God lefs infteade of more, but woulde not, fearing he mighte take it that I meant he had been giving me one. Mother hath returned ! The Mo- ment I hearde her Voice I fell to trembling. At the fame Moment I hearde Robin cry, " Oh, Mother, I " have broken the greene Beaker ! " which betraied Apprehenfion in an- other Quarter. However, fhe quite mildlie replied, " Ah, I knew the " Handle was loofe," and then kifl me with foe great Affection that I felt quite ealie. She had beene withhelde by a troubleforne Cold from of Mary Powell. from returning at the appointed Time, and cared not to write. 'Twas juft Supper-time, and there were the Children to kifs and to give theire Bread and Milk, and Bill's Letter to reade; foe that Nothing particular was fayd till the younger Ones were gone to Bed, and Father and Mother were taking fome Wine and Toaft. Then fays Father, "Well, Wife, " have you got the five hundred " Pounds ? " " No," me anfwers, rather carelefflie. " I tolde you how " 'twoulde be," fays Father ; " you " mighte as well have flayed at " Home." " Really, Mr. Powell" fays Mother, " foe feldom as I ftir " from my owne Chimney-corner, " you neede not to grudge me, I " think, a few Dayes among our " mutuall Relatives." " I fhall goe " to Gaol," fays Father. " Non- " fenfe," fays Mother ; " to Gaol " indeed ! " 53 1643. 54 1643. Maiden & Married Life " indeed ! " " Well, then, who is " to keepe me from it ? " fays Fa- ther, laughing. " I will anfwer for " it, Mr. Milton will wait a little " longer for his Money," fays Mo- ther, " he is an honourable Man, " I fuppofe." " I wifh he may " thinke me one," fays Father ; " and as to a little longer, what is " the goode of waiting for what " is as unlikelie to come eventuallie " as now ? " " You muft anfwer " that for yourfelfe," fays Mother, looking wearie: '* I have done what I can, and can doe no more." Well, then, 'tis lucky Matters ftand as they do," fays Father. " Mr. Milton has been much here in your Abfence, my Dear, and has " taken a Liking to our Moll ; foe, believing him, as you fay, to be an honourable Man, I have pro- mifed he fhall have her." " Non- " fenfe," of Mary Powell. " fenfe," cries Mother, turning red and then pale. " Never farther " from Nonfenfe," fays Father, "for " 'tis to be, and by the Ende of the " Month too." " You are bantering 11 me, Mr. Powell," fays Mother. " How can you fuppofe foe, my " Deare ? " fays Father, " you doe "me Injuftice." "Why, Mo//!" cries Mother, turning fharplie to- wards me, as I fate mute and fear- fulle, "what is alle this, Child? " You cannot, you dare not think " of wedding this round-headed " Puritan." " Not round-headed," fayd I, trembling ; " his Haire is as " long and curled as mine." "Don't " bandy Words with me, Girl," fays Mother, paffionatelie, " fee how unfit " you are to have a Houfe of your " owne, who cannot be left in " Charge of your Father's for a Fortnighte, without falling into " Mifchiefe ! " 55 1643. 1643- Maiden & Married Life " Mifchiefe ! " "I won't have Moll " chidden in that Way," fays Father, " me has fallen into noe Mifchiefe, " and has beene a difcreete and "dutifull Child." "Then it has " beene alle your doing," fays Mo- ther, " and you have forced the " Child into this Match." " Noe " Forcing whatever," fays Father, " they like one another, and I am " very glad of it, for it happens to " be very convenient." " Conve- " nient, indeed," repeats Mother, and falls a-weeping. Thereon I| muft needs weepe too, but {he fays, " Begone to Bed; there is noe Neede " that you fhoulde fit by to heare " your owne Father confeffe what " a Fool he has beene." To my Bedroom I have come, but cannot yet feek my Bed; the more as I ftill heare theire Voices in Contention below. This of Mary Powell. This Morninge's Breakfafte was mofte uncomfortable, I feeling like a checkt Child, fcarce minding to looke up or to eat. Mother, with Eyes red and fwollen, fcarce fpeak- ing fave to the Children ; Father directing his Difcourfe chieflie to Dick, concerning Farm Matters and I the Rangerfhip of Shotover, tho' 'twas eafie to fee his Mind was not with them. Soe foone as alle had difperfed to theire cuftomed Tafkes, and I was loitering at the Window, Father calls aloud to me from his Studdy. Thither I go, and find him and Mother, me fitting with her Back to both. " Moll," fays Father, with great Determination, "you have ac- " cepted Mr. Milton to pleafe your- j " felf, you will marry him out of " Hand to pleafe me." "Spare me, " fpare me, Mr. Powell," interrupts Mother, " if the Engagement may "not 57 1643. Tuesday. 1643. Maiden & Married Life " not be broken off, at the leaft " precipitate it not with this in- " decent Hafte. Poftponeittill " Till when?"' fays Father. " Till " the Child is olde enough to know " her owne Mind." " That is, to " put off an honourable Man on " falfe Pretences," fays Father, "me " is olde enough to know it alreadie. " Speake, Moll, are you of your " Mother s Mind to give up Mr. " Milton altogether?" I trembled, but fayd, "No." "Then, as his " Time is precious, and he knows " not when he may leave his Home " agayn, I fave you the Trouble, " Child, of naming a Day, for it " mall be the Monday before Whit- "funtide" Thereat Mother gave a Kind of Groan; but as for me, I had like to have fallen on the Ground, for I had had noe Thought of fuche Hafte. " See what you are " doing, of Mary Powell. 59 " doing, Mr. Powell" fays Mother, | l643 . compaffionating me, and raifing me up, though fomewhat roughlie ; " I prophecie Evil of this Match." " Prophets of Evil are fure to find " Lifteners," fays Father, " but I am "not one of them;" and foe left the Room. Thereon my Mother, who ahvaies feares him when he has a Fit of Determination, loofed the Bounds of her Paffion, and chid me fo unkindlie, that, humbled and mortified, I was glad to feeke my Chamber. * * * # Entering the Dining- room, however, I uttered a Shriek on feeing Father fallen back in his Chair, as though in a Fit, like unto that which terrified us a Year ago; and Mother hearing me call out, ran in, loofed his Collar, and foone broughte him to himfelfe, tho' not without much Alarm to alle. He made 60 Maiden & Married Life l643 made light of it himfelfe, and fayd 'twas merelie a fuddain Rum of Blood to the Head, and woulde not be difluaded from going out; but Mother was playnly fmote at the Heart, and having lookt after him with fome Anxietie, exclaimed, " I " fhall neither meddle nor make "more in this BufinefTe: your Fa~ " therms fuddain Seizures mall never " be layd at my Doore ; " and foe left me, till we met at Dinner. After the Cloth was drawne, enters Mr. Milt on y who goes up to Mother, and with Gracefulneffe kifTes her Hand; but me withdrewe it pet- timly, and tooke up her Sewing, on the which he lookt at her wonder- ingly, and then at me; then at her agayne, as though he woulde reade her whole Character in her Face; which having feemed to doe, and to write the fame in fome private Page of ofMary Powell. of his Heart, he never troubled her or himfelf with further Comment, but tooke up Matters jufl where he had left them laft. Ere we parted we had fome private Conference touching our Marriage, for haften- ing which he had foe much to fay that I coulde not long contend with him, efpeciallie as I founde he had plainlie made out that Mother loved him not. Houfe full of Companie, leaving noe Time to write nor think. Mo- ther fayth, tho' me cannot forbode an happie Marriage, me will provide for a merrie Wedding, and hathe growne more than commonlie tender to me, and given me fome Trinkets, a Piece of fine Holland Cloth, and enoughe of green Sattin for a Gown, that will ftand on End with its owne RichnefTe. She hathe me conftantlie with 61 1643. Wednesday. 62 1643. Maiden & Married Life with her in the Kitchen, Paflrie, and Store-room, telling me 'tis needfulle I fhoulde improve in Houfewiferie, feeing I mail foe foone have a Home of my owne. But I think Mother knows not, and I am afeard to tell her, that Mr. Milton hath no Houfe of his owne to carry me to, but onlie Lodgings, which have well fuited his Bachelor State, but may not, 'tis likelie, befeeme a Lady to live in. He deems fo himfelf, and fayeth ! we will look out for an hired Houfe i together, at our Leifure. Alle this he hath fayd to me in an Under- tone, in Mother's Prefence, me few- ing at the Table and we fitting in the Window ; and 'tis difficult to tell how much me hears, for me will afke no Queftions, and make noe Com- ments, onlie compreifes her Lips, which makes me think me knows. The c/'Mary Powell. The Children are in turbulent Spiritts; but Robin hath done nought but mope and make Moan fince he learnt he muft foe foone lofe me. A Thought hath ftruck me, Mr. Milton educates his Sifter's Sons ; two Lads of about Robin's Age. What if he woulde confent to take my Brother under his Charge? per- haps Father would be willing. Laft Vifitt to Sheepfcote, at leafte, as Mary Powell; but kind Rofe and Roger Agnew will give us the Ufe of it for a Week on our Marriage, and fpend the Time with dear Father and Mother, who will neede their Kindnefle. Rofe and I walked long aboute the Garden, her Arm round my Neck; and me was avifed to fay, " Cloth of Frieze, be not too bold, Tho* thou be matcht with Cloth of Gold," And 1643. Saturday. 1643. May zznd. Maiden & Married Life And then craved my Pardon for foe unmannerly a Rhyme, which in- deede, methoughte, needed an Ex- cufe, but expreft a Feare that I knew not (what me called) my high Deftiny, and prayed me not to trifle with Mr. Milton's Feelings nor in his Sighte, as I had done the Daye me dined at Foreft Hill. I laught, and fayd, he muft take me as he found me: he was going to marry Mary Powell, not the Wife Widow of Tekoab. Rofe lookt wiftfullie, but I bade her take Heart, for I doubted not we fhoulde content cache the other; and for the Reft, her Advice fhoulde not be forgotten. Thereat, me was pacyfied. Alle Buftle and Confufion, flay- ing of Poultrie, making of Paftrie, etc. People coming and going, preft to dine and to fup, and refufe, and then of Mary Powell. then ftay, the colde Meats and Wines ever on the Table ; and in the Even- ing, the Rebecks and Recorders fent for that we may dance in the Hall. My Spiritts have been moft un- equall ; and this Evening I was overtaken with a fuddain FaintnerTe, fuch as I never but once before ex- perienced. They would let me dance no more ; and I was quite tired enoughe to be glad to fit aparte with Mr. Milton neare the Doore, with the Moon mining on us ; untill at length he drew me out into the Garden. He fpake of HappinefTe and Home, and Hearts knit in Love, and of heavenlie Efpoufals, and of Man being the Head of the Woman, and of our Lord's Marriage with the Church, and of white Robes, and the Bridegroom coming in Clouds of Glory, and of the Voices of ringing Men and fmging Women, p. and 1643. 66 1643. May 23(1. Maiden & Married Life and eternall Spring, and eternall Blifle, and much that I cannot call to Mind, and other-much that I coulde not comprehende, but which was in mine Ears as the Song of Birds, or Falling of Waters. Rofe hath come, and hath kindlie offered to help pack the Trunks, (which are to be fent off by the Waggon to London?) that I may have the more Time to devote to Mr. Milton. Nay, but he will foon have all my Time devoted to him- felf, and I would as lief fpend what little remains in mine accuftomed Haunts, after mine accuftomed Fa- fhion. I had purpofed a Ride on Clover this Morning, with Robin ; but the poor Boy muft I trow be difappointed. And for what? Oh me! I have hearde fuch a long Sermon on of Mary Powell. on Marriage-duty and Service, that I am faine to fit down and weepe. But no, I rnuft not, for they are waiting for me in the Hall, and the Guefts are come and the Mufick is tuning, and my Lookes muft not betray me. And now farewell, Journall ; or Rofe, who firft bade me keepe you (little deeming after what Famion), will not pack you up, and I will not clofe you with a heavie Strayn. Robin is calling me beneath the Window, Father is fitting in the Shade, under the old Pear-tree, feemingly in gay Dif- courfe with Mr. Milton. To-morrow the Village-bells will ring for the Marriage of MARY POWELL. 1643. London, 68 1643. Maiden csf Married Life London, Mr. Ru/ell's, Taylor, Bride's Churchyard. Oh me ! is this my new Home ? my Heart finkes alreadie. After the fwete frefh Ayre of Sheepf- cote y and the Cleanlinefs, and the Quiet, and the pleafant Smells, Sightes, and Soundes, alle whereof Mr. Milton enjoyed to the Full as keenlie as I, faying they minded him of Paradife, how woulde Rofe pitie me, could me view me in this clofe Chamber, the Floor whereof of dark, uneven Boards, muft have beene layd, methinks, three hundred Years ago ; the oaken Pannells, utterlie destitute of Polifh, and with fundrie Chinks ; the Bed with dull brown Hangings, lined with as dull a greene, occupying Half the Space ; and of Mary Powell. and Half the Remainder being filled with duftie Books, whereof there are Store alfoe in every other Place. This Mirror, I mould thinke, be- longed to faire Rofamond. And this Arm-chair to King Lear. Over the Chimnie hangs a ruefull Por- trait, maybe of Grotius, but I moulde fooner deeme it of fome Worthie before the Flood. Onlie one Quarter of the Cafement will open, and that upon a Profpecl:, oh dolefulle ! of the Churchyarde ! Mr. Milton had need be as blythe as he was all the Time we were at Shtepfcote, or I mail be buried in that fame Churchyarde within the Twelvemonth. 'Tis well he has ftepped out to fee a Friend, that I may in his Abfence get ridd of this Fit of the Difmalls. I wifh it may be the lafl. What would Mother fay to his bringing me to fuch 1643. jo Maiden & Married Life 1643- fuch a Home as this ? I will not think. Soe this is London! How diverfe from the " towred Citie" of my Hufband's verfmg ! and of his Profe too ; for as he fpake, by the Way, of the Diforders of our Time, which extend even into cache domeftick Circle, he fayd that alle mufl, for a While, appear confufed to our imperfect View, juft as a mightie Citie unto a Stranger who fhoulde beholde around him huge, unfinished Fabrics, the Plan whereof he could but imperfecHie make out, amid the Builders' diforderlie Ap- paratus ; but that, from afar, we mighte perceive glorious Refults from party Contentions, Free- dom fpringing up from Oppreffion, Intelligence fucceeding Ignorance, Order following Diforder, juft as that fame Traveller looking at the Citie from a diilant Height, mould beholde of Mary Powell. 71 beholde Towres and Spires glitter- l6 43- ing with Gold and Marble, Streets ftretching in leflening Perfpectives, and Bridges flinging their white Arches over noble Rivers. But what of this faw we all along the Oxford Road ? Firftlie, there was noe commanding Height ; fecond, there was the Citie obfcured by a drizzling Rain ; the Ways were foul, the Faces of thofe we mett fpake lefs of Pleafure than Bulinefs, and Bells were tolling, but none ringing. Mr. Milton's Father, a grey-haired, kind old Man, was here to give us Welcome : and his firfte Words were, " Why, John, " thou haft ftolen a March on us. " Soe quickly, too, and foe fnug ! " but me is faire enoughe, Man, to " excufe thee, Royalift or noe." And foe, taking me in his Arms, kift me franklie. But I heare my 1643. Thursday. Maiden & Married Life my Hufband's Voice, and another with it. 'Twas a Mr. Lawrence whom my Hufband brought Home laft Nighte to fup ; and the Evening palTed righte pleafantlie, with News, Jeftes, and a little Muficke. Todaye hath been kindlie devoted by Mr. Milton to mewing me Sights: and oh! the ftrange, diverting Cries in the Streets, even from earlie Dawn ! " New Milk and Curds from the " Dairie ! " " Olde Shoes for fome " Brooms!" " Anie Kitchen-ftuffe, " have you, Maids ? " " Come buy " my greene Herbes !" and then in the Streets, here a Man preaching, there another juggling : here a Boy with an Ape, there a Show of Nineveh : next the News from the North ; and as for the China Shops and Drapers in the Strand, and the Cook's of Mary Powell. 73 Cook's Shops in Weftminfter, with 1643. the fmoking Ribs of Beef and frefh Salads fet out on Tables in the Street, and Men in white Aprons crying out, " Calf's Liver, Tripe, and hot " Sheep's Feet " -'twas enoughe to make One untimelie hungrie, or take One's Appetite away, as the Cafe might be. Mr. Milton mewed me the noble Minfter, with King Harry Seventh's Chapel adjoining ; and pointed out the old Houfe where Ben yonfon died. Neare the Broade Sanffuarie, we fell in with a flighte, dark-complexioned young Gentle- man of two or three and twenty, whome my Hufband efpying cryed, " What, Marae/fJ" the other comi- cally anfwering, "What Marvel?" and then, handfomlie faluting me and complimenting Mr. Milton, much lighte and pleafant Difcourfe enfued ; and finding we were aboute to take Boat, 74 1 643- Friday. Maiden & Married Life Boat, he volunteered to goe with us on the River. After manie Hours' Exercife, I have come Home fa- tigued, yet well pleafed. Mr. Mar- ve// fups with us. I wiih I could note down a Tithe of the pleafant Things that were fayd lafl Nighte. Firft, olde Mr. Milton having ftept out with his Son, I called in Rachael, the younger of Mr. RuJJelTs Serving-maids, (for we have none of our owne as yet, which tends to much Difcomfiture,) and, with her Aide, I dufted the Bookes and fett them up in half the Space they had occupied ; then cleared away three large Bafketfuls of the abfoluteft Rubbifh, torn Letters and the like, and fent out for Flowers, (which it feemeth ftrange enoughe to me to buy?) which gave the Chamber a gayer Aire, and foe my Hufhand of Mary Powell. 75 Hufband fayd when he came in, calling me the fayreft of them alle ; and then, fitting down with Gayety to the Organ, drew forthe from it heavenlie Sounds. Afterwards Mr. Mar veil came in, and they difcourfed about Italy, and Mr. Milton promifed his Friend fome Letters of Intro- duction to yacopo Gaddi, C lenient illo, and others. After Supper, they wrote Sen- tences, Definitions, and the like, after a Fafhion of Catherine de Me- dici, fome of which I have layd afide for Rofe. To-day we have feene St. Paul's faire Cathedral, and the School where Mr. Milton was a Scholar when a Boy ; thence, to the Fields of Fin/bury ; where are Trees and Windmills enow : a Place much frequented for prac- tifing 7 6 Maiden & Married Life 1643- tifmg Archery and other manlie Exercifes. Saturday. Tho' we rife betimes, olde Mr. Milton is earlier ftille ; and I always find him fitting at his Table befide the Window (by Reafon of the Chamber being foe dark,) forting I know not how manie Bundles of Papers tied with red Tape ; cache fo like the other that I marvel how he knows them aparte. This Morn- ing, I found the poore old Gentle- man in fad Diftrefs at mifling a Manufcript Song of Mr. Henry Lawes't the onlie Copy extant, which he perfuaded himfelfe that I muft have fent down to the Kitchen Fire Yeflerday. I am convinced I difmift not a fingle Paper that was not torne cache Way, as being ut- terlie ufeleffe ; but as the unluckie Song cannot be founde, he fighs and m of Mary Powell. and is certayn of my Delinquence, as is Hubert, his owne Man ; or, as he more frequentlie calls him, his " odd Man ; " and an odd Man indeede is Mr. Hubert, readie to addrefs his Mailer or Mafter's Sonne on the mereft Occafion, without waiting to be fpoken to ; tho' he expec~leth Others to treat them with far more Deference than he himfelf payeth. Dead tired, this Daye, with fo much Exercife ; but woulde not fay foe, becaufe my Hufband was thinking to pleafe me by mew- ing me foe much. Spiritts flagging however. Thefe London Streets wearie my Feet. We have been over the Houfe in Alderfgate Street, the Garden whereof difappointed me, having hearde foe much of it; but 'tis far better than none, and the Houfe is large enough for 77 1643. 1643. Sunday Even. Maiden & Married Life for Mr. Milton s Familie and my Father's to boote. Thought how pleafant 'twould be to have them alle aboute me next ChriftmaJ/e ; but that holie Time is noe longer kept with Joyfullneffe in London. Ventured, therefore, to exprefTe a Hope, we mighte fpend it at For eft Hill; but Mr. Milton fayd 'twas unlikelie he mould be able to leave Home ; and afkt, would I go alone? Conftrained, for Shame, to fay no ; but felt, in my Heart, I woulde jump to fee For eft Hill on anie Terms, I foe love alle that dwell there. Private and publick Prayer, Ser- mons, and Pfalm-finging from Morn until Nighte. The onlie Break hath been a Vifit to a quaint but pleafing Lady, by Name Catherine Thompfon, whome my Hufband holds in great Reverence. of Mary Powell. 79 Reverence. She faid manie Things l6 43- worthy to be remembered ; onlie as I remember them, I need not to write them down. Sorrie to be caughte napping by my Huf- band, in the Midft of the third long Sermon. This comes of over- walking, and of being unable to deep o' Nights ; for whether it be the London Ayre, or the Lon- don Methods of making the Beds, or the flrange Noifes in the Streets, I know not, but I have fcarce beene able to clofe my Eyes before Daybreak lince I came to Town. And now beginneth a new Life ; Monday. for my Hufband's Pupils, who were difmifl for a Time for my Sake, returne to theire Tafks this Daye, and olde Mr. Milton giveth Place to his two Grandfons, his widowed Daughter's 1643. Maiden & Married Life Daughter's Children, Edward and Jo/in Phillips, whom my Huflband led in to me juft now. Two plainer Boys I never fett Eyes on ; the one weak-eyed and puny, the other prim and puritanicall no more to be compared to our fweet Robin ! * * * After a few Words, they retired to theire Books ; and my Hufband, taking my Hand, fayd in his kind- Heft Manner, " And now I leave " my fweete Moll to the pleafant " Companie of her own goode and " innocent Thoughtes ; and, if me " needs more, here are both ftringed " and keyed Inftruments, and Books " both of the older and modern " Time, foe that me will not find " the Hours hang heavie." Me- thoughte how much more I mould like a Ride upon Clover than all the Books that ever were penned ; for the Door no fooner clofed upon Mr. of Mary Powell. Mr. Milton than it feemed as tho' he had taken alle the Sunmine with him ; and I fell to cleaning the Cafement that I mighte look out the better into the Churchyarde, and then altered Tables and Chairs, and then fate downe with my El- bows refting on the Window-feat, and my Chin on the Palms of my Hands, gazing on I knew not what, and feeling like a Butterflie under a Wine-glafs. I marvelled why it feemed foe long iince I was married, and won- dered what they were doing at Home, coulde fancy I hearde Mo- ther chiding, and faw Charlie Healing into the Dairie and dipping his Fin- ger in the Cream, and Kate feeding the Chickens, and Dick taking a Stone out of Whiteftar's Shoe. Methought how dull it was to be paffing the beft Part of the G Summer 81 1643. 82 1643. Maiden & Married Life Summer out of the Reache of frefli Ayre and greene Fields, and won- dered, woulde alle my future Sum- mers be foe fpent ? Thoughte how dull it was to live in Lodgings, where one could not even go into the Kitchen to make a Pudding ; and how dull to live in a Town, without fome young female Friend with whom one might have ventured into the Streets, and where one could not foe much as feed Colts in a Paddock; how dull to be without a Garden, unable foe much as to gather a Handfulle of ripe Cherries ; and how dull to looke into a Church- yarde, where there was a Man digging a Grave ! When I wearied of {taring at the Grave-digger, I gazed at an olde Gentleman and a young Lady flowlie walking along, yet fcarce as if of Mary Powell. if I noted them ; and was thinking moftlie of Forefl Hill, when I faw them flop at our Doore, and pre- fently they were fhewn in, by the Name of Doctor and Miftrefs Da- vies. I fent for my Hufband, and entertayned 'em bothe as well as I could, till he appeared, and they were polite and pleafant to me ; the young Lady tall and {lender, of a cleare brown Skin, and with Eyes that were fine enough ; onlie there was a fuppreft Smile on her Lips alle the Time, as tho' me had feen me looking out of the Window. She tried me on all Subjects, I think; for fhe ftarted them more adroitlie than I ; and taking up a Book on the Window-feat, which was the Amadigi of Bernardo Ta/o, printed alle in Italiques, me fayd, if I loved Poetry, which me was fure I muft, me knew me moulde love me. I did 1643. 1643. Wednesday. Maiden & Married Life did not tell her whether or noe. Then we were both filent. Then Doctor Davies talked vehementlie to Mr. Milton agaynft the King; and Mr. Milton was not fo contrarie to him as I could have wifhed. Then Miftrefs Davies tooke the Word from her Father, and beganne to talke to Mr. Milton of Taffo, and Dante, and Boiardo, and Ariojlo; and then Doctor Davies and I were filent. Methoughte, they both talked well, tho' I knew fo little of their SubjecT:- matter ; onlie they complimented eache other too much. I mean not they were infincere, for eache feemed to think highlie of the other; onlie we neede not fay alle we feele. To conclude, we are to fup with them to-morrow. your nail, I have Nobodie now but you, to whome to tell my little Griefs ; of Mary Powell. Griefs ; indeede, before I married, 1643. I know not that I had anie ; and even now, they are very fmall, onlie they are foe new, that fometimes my Heart is like to burft. I know not whether 'tis fafe to put them alle on Paper, onlie it relieves for the Time, and it kills Time, and perhaps, a little While hence I may looke back and fee how fmall they were, and how they mighte have beene fhunned, or better borne. 'Tis worth the Triall. Yefterday Morn, for very Wea- rineffe, I looked alle over my Linen and Mr. Milton's, to fee could I finde anie Thing to mend ; but there was not a Stitch amifs. I woulde have played on the Spin- nette, but was afrayd he mould hear my indifferent Mufick. Then, as a laft Refource, I tooke a Book Paul Perrins Hiftorie of the Wal- denfes; 86 1643. Maiden & Married Life denfes ; and was, I believe, dozing a little, when I was aware of a continuall Whifpering and Crying. I thought 'twas fome Child in the Street ; and, having fome Comfits in my Pocket, I ftept foftlie out to the Houfe-door and lookt forth, but no Child could I fee. Coming back, the Door of my Hufband's Studdy being ajar, I was avifed to look in ; and faw him, with awfulle Brow, raifmg his Hand in the very Acl: to flrike the youngefl Phillips. I could never endure to fee a Child ftruck, foe haftilie cryed out, " Oh, don't!" whereon he rofe, and, as if not feeing me, gently clofed the Door, and, before I reached my Chamber, I hearde foe loud a Crying that I began to cry too. Soon, alle was quiet; and my Hufband, coming in, ftept gently up to me, and putting his Arm about my Neck, fayd, " My of Mary Powell. 87 " My deareft Life, never agayn, I I(5 43- " befeech you, interfere between " me and the Boys : 'tis as un- " feemlie as tho' I fhoulde interfere " between you and your Maids, " when you have any, and will " weaken my Hands, dear Moll, " more than you have anie Suf- " picion of." I replied, kiffing that fame of- fending Member as I fpoke, " Poor " "Jack would have beene glad, juft " now, if I had weakened them." " But that is not the Queflion," he returned, " for we mould alle be " glad to efcape neceiTary Punim- " ment ; whereas, it is the Power, " not the Penalty of our bad Habits, " that we fhoulde feek to be de- *' livered from." " There may," I fayd, " be neceflary, but need not " be corporal Punifhment." " That " is as may be," returned he, " and " hath 1643. Maiden & Married Life " hath alreadie been fettled by an " Authoritie to which I fubmit, and " hardlie think you will difpute, " and that is, the Word of God. " Pain of Body is in Realitie, or " ought to be, fooner over and more " fafelie borne than Pain of an in- " genuous Mind ; and, as to the " Shame, why, as Lorenzo de* Me- " did fayd to Soccini, ' The Shame " ' is in the Offence rather than in " ' the Punifhment.' " I replied, "Our Robin had never " beene beaten for his Studdies ; " to which he fayd with a Smile, that even I mufl admit Robin to be noe greate Scholar. And fo in good Humour left me ; but I was in no good Humour, and hoped Heaven might never make me the Mother of a Son, for if I mould fee Mr. Milton ftrike him, I fhould learn to hate the Father. Learning of Mary Powell. Learning there was like to be Companie at Doctor Dailies', I was avifed to put on my brave greene Satin Gown; and my Hufband fayd it became me well, and that I onlie needed fome Primrofes and Cowflips in my Lap, to look like May; and fornewhat he added about mine Eyes' " clear mining after Rain," which avifed me he had perceived I had beene crying in the Morning, which I had hoped he had not. Arriving at the Doctor's Houfe, we were fhewn into an emptie Chamber; at leaft, emptie of Com- panie, but full of every Thing elfe; for there were Books, and Globes, and flringed and wind Inftruments, and fluffed Birds and Beafts, and Things I know not foe much as the Names of, befides an Eafel with a Painting by Mrs. Mildred on it, which me meant to be feene, or fhe woulde i6 43 . 9 o 1643. Maiden & Married Life woulde have put it away. Sub- ject, " Brutus' s Judgment:" which I thought a ftrange, unfeeling one for a Woman ; and did not wim to be her Son. Soone (he came in, dreft with ftuddied and puritan- icall Plainnefle; in brown Taffeta, guarded with black Velvet, which became her well enough, but was fcarce fuited for the Seafon. She had much to fay about limning, in which my Hufband could follow her better than I; and then they went to the Globes, and Copernicus, and Galileo Galilei, whom fhe called a Martyr, but I do not. For, is a Martyr one who is unwillinglie im- prifoned, or who formally recants ? even tho' he affected afterwards to fay 'twas but a Form, and cries, " Eppure, Ji muove ? " The earlier Chriflians might have fayd 'twas but a Form to burn a Handfull of Incenfe 0/*Mary Powell. Incenfe before Jove's Statua ; Pliny woulde have let them goe. Afterwards, when the Do<5tor came in and engaged my Hufband in Difcourfe, Miftrefs Mildred de- voted herfelfe to me, and afkt what Progrefle I had made with Bernardo Taffo. I tolde her, none at alle, for I was equallie faultie at Italiques and Italian, and onlie knew his beft Work thro' Mr. Fairfax's Tranf- lation; whereat me fell laughing, and fayd ihe begged my Forgive- nefle, but I was confounding the Father with the Sonne; then laught agayn, but pretended 'twas not at me but at a Lady I minded her of, who never coulde remember to dif- tinguifh betwixt Lionardo da Vinci and Lorenzo dei Medici. That la ft Name brought up the Recollection of my Morning's Debate with my Hufband, which made me feel fad; and 9 1 1643. 9 2 i6 43 . Maiden & Married Life and then, Mrs. Mildred, feeminge anxious to make me forget her Unmannerlinefs, commenced, " Can " you paint?" " Can you fing?" " Can you play the Lute ? " and, at the laft, " What can you do ? " I mighte have fayd I coulde comb out my Curls fmoother than me coulde hers, but did not. Other Guefts came in, and talked fo much agaynft Prelacy and the Right divine of Kings that I woulde fain we had remained at Aflronomie and Poetry. For Supper there was little Meat, and noe flrong Drinks, onlie a thinnifh foreign Wine, with Cakes, Candies, Sweetmeats, Fruits, and Confections. Such, I fuppofe, is Town Fafhion. At the lafte, came Mufick ; Miftrefs Mildred fang and played; then preft me to do the like, but I was foe fearfulle, I coulde not; fo my Hufband fayd he of Mary Powell. he woulde play for me, and that woulde be alle one, and foe covered my Bafhfulleneffe handfomlie. Onlie this Morning, juft before going to his Studdy, he ftept back and fayd, " Sweet Moll y I know you " can both play and fing why will "you not praclife?" I reply ed, I loved it not much. He rejoyned, " But you know I love it, and is "not that a Motive?" I fayd, I feared to let him hear me, I played fo ill. He replyed, " Why, that is " the very Reafon you fhoulde feek " to play better, and I am fure you " have Plenty of Time. Perhaps, " in your whole future Life, you " will not have fuch a Seafon " of Leifure as you have now, " a golden Opportunity, which you " will furelie feize." Then added, " Sir 'Thomas Mores Wife learnt to " play the Lute, folely that me " mighte 93 1643. 94 1643. Maiden & Married Life " mighte pleafe her Hufband." I anfwered, " Nay, what Need to tell " me of Sir 'Thomas More 's Wife, or " of Hugh Grotiuss Wife, when I "was the Wife of John Milton?" He looked at me twice, and quick- lie, too, at this Saying; then laugh- ing, cried, " You cleaving Mifchief ! " I hardlie know whether to take " that Speech amifTe or well how- " ever, you mall have the Benefit of " the Doubt." And fo away laughing; and I, for very Shame, fat down to the Spinnette for two wearie Hours, till foe tired, I coulde cry; and when I deiifted, coulde hear Jack wailing over his Tafk. 'Tis raining fail, I cannot get out, nor mould I dare to go alone, nor where to go to if 'twere fine. I fancy ill Smells from the Churchyard 'tis long to Dinner-time, with noe Change, noe Exercife; of Mary Powell. 95 Exercife ; and oh, I figh for Forejl 1643- Hill. A dull Dinner with Mrs. Phil- lips, whom I like not much. Chrif- topher Milton there, who flared hard at me, and put me out of Coun- tenance with his ftrange Queftions. My Hufband checked him. He is a Lawyer, and has Wit enoughe. Mrs. Phillips fpeaking of fecond Marriages, I unawares hurt her by giving my Voice agaynft them. It feems me is thinking of contracting a fecond Marriage. At Supper, wiming to ingra- tiate myfelf with the Boys, talked to them of Countrie Sports, etc. : to which the youngeft liftened greedilie : and at length I was avifed to afk them woulde they not like to fee Forejl Hill? to which the elder replyed in his mofh methodicall Manner, 9 6 1643. Friday. Maiden & Married Life Manner, " If Mr. Powell has a good " Library." For this Piece of Hy- pocrifie, at which I heartilie laught, he was commended by his Uncle. Hypocrifie it was, for Mafter Ned cryeth over his Tafkes pretty nearlie as oft as the youngeft. To rewarde my zealous Practice to-day on the Spinnette, Mr. Milton produced a Collection of " Ay res, and " Dialogues, for one, two, and three " Voices" by his Friend, Mr. Harry Lawes, which he fayd I fhoulde find very pleafant Studdy; and then he told me alle about theire getting up the Mafque of Comus in Ludlonv Caftle, and how well the Lady's Song was fung by Mr. Lawes' Pupil, the Lady Alice, then a fweet, modeft Girl, onlie thirteen Years of Age, and he told me of the Singing of a faire Italian young Signora, named Leonora of Mary Powell. Leonora Barroni, with her Mother and Sifter, whome he had hearde at Rome y at the Concerts of Cardinal Earberini; and how fhe was " as ' gentle and modeft as fweet Moll^ yet not afrayd to open her Mouth, and pronounce everie Syllable dif- tinclilie, and with the proper Em- phafis and PafTion when fhe fang. And after this, to my greate Con- tentment, he tooke me to the Gray's Inn Walks y where, the Af- ternoon being fine, was much Com- panie. After Supper, \ propofed to the Boys that we fhoulde tell Stories; and Mr. Milton tolde one charm- \ inglie, but then went away to write a Latin Letter. Soe Ned's Turn came next; and \ muft, if I can, for very Mirthe's Sake, write it down in his exact Words, they were foe pragmaticall. H "On 97 1643. 1643. Maiden & Married Life " On a Daye, there was a certain " Child wandered forthe, that would " play. He met a Bee, and fayd, "< Bee, wilt thou play with me?' " The Bee fayd, ' No, I have my " Duties to perform, tho' you, it " woulde feeme, have none. I " muft away to make Honey.' " Then the Childe, abafht, went " to the Ant. He fayd, ' Will you " play with me, Ant ? ' The Ant " replied, ' Nay, I muft provide " againft the Winter.' In fhorte, " he found that everie Bird, Beafte, " and Infed: he accofted, had a clofer " Eye to the Purpofe of their Cre- " ation than .himfelfe. Then he " fayd, ' I will then back, and con " my Tafk.' Moral. The Moral " of the foregoing Fable, my deare " Aunt, is this We muft love Work " better than Play." With alle my Intereft for Chil- dren, of Mary Powell. dren, how is it pomble to take anie Intereft in foe formall a little Prigge? I have juft done fomewhat for Mafler Ned which he coulde not doe for himfelfe viz. tenderly bound up his Hand, which he had badly cut. Wiping away fome few na- turall Tears, he muft needs fay, " I am quite afhamed, Aunt, you " fhoulde fee me cry; but the worfl " of it is, that alle this Payne has " beene for noe Good ; whereas, " when my Uncle beateth me for " mifconftruing my Latin y tho' I " cry at the Time, -all the While " I know it is for my Advantage." If this Boy goes on preaching foe, I mall foon hate him. Mr. Milton having ftepped out before Supper, came back looking foe blythe, that I afkt if he had hearde 99 i6 43 . Saturday. IOO 1643. Maiden & Married Life icarde good News. He fayd, yes: that fome Friends had long beene Derfuading him, againft his Will, to make publick fome of his Latin Poems ; and that, having at length confented to theire Wifhes, he had beene with Mo/ley the Publisher in Paul's Churchyard, who agreed to print them. I fayd, I was forrie I fhoulde be unable to read them. He fayd he was forry too ; he muft tranflate them for me. I thanked him, but obferved that Trad unions were never foe good as Originalls. He rejoyned, " Nor am I even a " good Tranflater." I afkt, "Why " not write in your owne Tongue?' He fayd, "Latin is underflood al! " over the Worlde." I fayd, " But " there are manie in your owne " Country do not underftand it.' He was filent foe long upon that that I fuppofed he did not mean to of Mary Powell. to anfwer me ; but then cried, "You are right, fweet Moll Our " beft Writers have written their " beft Works in Englijh, and I will " hereafter doe the fame, for I feel " that my beft Work is ftill to come. " Poetry hath hitherto been with " me rather the Recreation of a " Mind confcious of its Health, " than the deliberate Tafk-work of " a Soule that muft hereafter give " an Account of its Talents. Yet " my Mind, in the free Circuit of " her Muling, has ranged over a " thoufand Themes that lie, like " the Marble in the Qu_arry, readie " for anie Shape that Fancy and " Skill may give. Neither Lazinefs " nor Caprice makes me difficult in " my Choice ; for, the longer I am " in felecting my Tree, and laying " my Axe to the Root, the founder " it will be and the riper for Ufe. "Nor 101 1643. IO2 1643- Sunday Even. Maiden & Married Life " Nor is an Undertaking that mall " be one of high Duty, to be en- " tered upon without Prayer and "Difcipline: it woulde be Pre- " fumption indeede, to commence " an Enterprife which I meant " fhoulde delighte and profit every " inftrudted and elevated Mind with- " out fo much Paynes-takinge as it " mould coft a poor Mountebank to " balance a Pole on his Chin." In the Clouds agayn. At Dinner, to-daye, Mr. Milton catechifed the Boys on the Morning's Sermon, the Heads of which, though amounting to a Dozen, Ned tolde off roundlie. Roguifh little Jack looked flylie at me, fays, " Aunt coulde not tell off "the Sermon." "Why not? "fays his Uncle. " Becaufe me was fleep- " ing," fays Jack. Provoked with the Child, I turned fcarlett, and haftilie of Mary Powell. haftilie fayd, " I was not.'* No- bodie fpoke ; but I repented the Fal/itie the Moment it had efcaped me; and there was Ned, a folding of his Hands, drawing down his Mouth, and clofing his Eyes My Hufband tooke me to tafke for it when we were alone, foe tenderlie that I wept. yack fayd this Morning, " I know " Something I know Aunt keeps " a Journall." " And a good Thing " if you kept one, too, *Jack" fayd his Uncle, " it would mew you how " little you doe." Jack was filenced ; but Ned, purling up his Mouth, fays, " I can't think what Aunt can " have to put in a Journall mould " not you like, 'Uncle, to fee ? " " No, Ned," fays his Uncle, " I am " upon Honour, and your dear Aunt's " Journall is as fafe, for me, as the " golden 103 Monday. 104 Maiden & Married Life 1643. " golden Bracelets that King Alfred " hung upon the High-way. I am " glad (he has fuch a Refource, and, " as we know fhe cannot have much " News to put in it, we may the " more fafely rely that it is a Trea- " fury of fweet, and high, and holy, " and profitable Thoughtes." Oh, how deeplie I blumt at this ill-deferved Prayfe! How forrie I was that I had ever regiftered aught that he woulde grieve to read ! I fecretly refolved that this Daye's Journalling mould be the laft, untill I had attained a better Frame of Mind. Saturday I have kept Silence, yea, even from good Words, but it has beene a Payn and Griefe unto me. Good Miftrefs Catherine Thompfon called on me a few Dayes back, and fpoke fo wifely and fo wholefomelie con- cerning of Mary Powell. cerning my Lot, and the Way to make it happy, (me is the firft that hath fpoken as if 'twere pomble it mighte not be foe alreadie,) that I felt for a Seafon quite heartened ; but it has alle faded away. Becaufe the Source of CheerfulnerTe is not in me, anie more than in a dull Land- fkip, which the Sun lighteneth for awhile, and when he has fet, its Beauty is gone. Oh me ! how merry I was at Home ! The Source of Cheerful- nefle feemed in me then, and why is it not now ? Partly becaufe alle that I was there taught to think right is here thought wrong ; becaufe much that I there thought harmleiTe is here thought finfulle ; becaufe I cannot get at anie of the Things that employed and interefted me there, and becaufe the Things within my Reach here do not intereft me. Then, 105 1643. io6 1643. Maiden & Married Life Then, 'tis no fmall Thing to be continuallie deemed ignorant and mifinformed, and to have one's Errors continuallie covered, however handfomelie, even before Children. To fay Nothing of the Weight upon the Spiritts at firfte, from Change of Ayre, and Diet, and Scene, and Lofs of habituall Exercife and Com- panie and houfeholde Cares. Thefe petty Griefs try me forelie ; and when Coulin Ralph came in unex- pectedlie this Morn, tho' I never much cared for him at Home, yet the Sighte of Rofe's Brother, frefh from Sheepfcote and Oxford and Fore/I Hill t foe upfet me that I fank into Tears. No Wonder that Mr. Milton, then coming in, moulde haftilie enquire if Ralph had brought ill Tidings from Home ; and, finding alle was well there, moulde look ftrangelie. He afkt Ralph y however, to of Mary Powell. to ftay to Dinner; and we had much Talk of Home ; but now, I regret having omitted to afk a thoufand Queftions. Mr. Milton in his Clofet and I in my Chamber. For the firft Time he feems this Evening to have founde out how diffimilar are our Minds. Meaning to pleafe him, I fayd, " I " kept awake bravelie, to-nighte, " through that long, long Sermon, " for your Sake." " And why not " for God's Sake ? " cried he, " why " not for your owne Sake ? Oh, " fweet Wife, I fear you have yet " much to learn of the Depth of " HappinefTe that is comprifed in " the Communion between a for- " given Soul and its Creator. It " hallows the moft fecular as well " as the mofl fpirituall Employ- " ments ; it gives Pleafure that has "no 107 1643. Sunday Even. Aug. 15. io8 1643. Maiden & Married Life " no after Bitternefle ; it gives Plea- " fure to God and oh ! thinke of " the Depth of Meaning in thofe " Words ! think what it is for us " to be capable of giving God Plea- "fure!" J Much more, in the fame Vein ! to which I could not, with equal Power, refpond ; foe, he away to his Studdy, to pray perhaps for my Change of Heart, and I to my Bed. Aug. i, Oh Heaven! can it be poffible ? am I agayn at Foreji Hill? How ftrange, how joyfulle an Event, tho' brought about with Teares ! Can it be, that it is onlie a Month fince I floode at this Toilette as a Bride ? and lay awake on that Bed, thinking of London? How long a Month! and oh ! this prefent one will be alle too fhort. It of Mary Powell. It feemeth that Ralph Hewlett, mocked at my Teares and the Alter- ation in my Looks, broughte back a difmall Report of me to deare Father and Mother, pronouncing me either ill or unhappie. Thereupon, Richard, with his ufuall Impe- tuofitie, prevayled on Father to let him and Ralph fetch me Home for a While, at leafte till after Michael- majfe. How furprifed was I to fee Dick enter ! My Arms were foe fafl about his Neck, and my Face preft foe clofe to his Shoulder, that I did not for a While perceive the grave Looke he had put on. At the laft, I was avifed to aik what broughte him foe unexpedledlie to London ; and then he hemmed and looked at Ralph, and Ralph looked at Dick, and then Dick fayd bluntly, he hoped Mr. Milton woulde fpare me to go Home 109 1643. I 10 1643. Maiden & Married Life Home till after Michaelmaffe, anc Father had fent him on Purpofe to fay foe. Mr. Milton lookt furprifec and hurte, and fayd, how could he be expected to part foe foone with me, a Month's Bride ? it mutt be fome other Time : he had intended to take me himfelfe to Foreft Hill the following Spring, but coulde not fpare Time now, nor liked me to goe without him, nor thought I mould like it myfelf. But my Eyes faid / Jhoulde, and then he gazed earneftlie at me and lookt hurt ; and there was a dead Silence. Then Dick, hefitating a little, fayd he was forrie to tell us my Father was ill ; on which I clafped my Hands and beganne to weepe ; and Mr. Milton, changing Countenance, fkt fundrie Queftions, which Dick anfwered well enough; and then aid he woulde not be foe cruel as to of Mary Powell. to keepe me from a Father I foe dearlie loved, if he were fick, though he liked not my travelling in fuch unfettled Times with fo young a Convoy. Ralph fayd they had brought Diggory with them, who was olde and fteddy enough, and had ridden my Mother's Mare for my Ufe ; and Dick was for our getting forward a Stage on our Journey the fame Evening, but Mr. Milton iniifhed on our abiding till the following Morn, and woulde not be overruled. And gave me leave to flay a Month, and gave me Money, and many kind Words, which I coulde mark little, being foe overtaken with Concern about dear Father, whofe Illnefs I feared to be worfe than Dick fayd, feeing he feemed foe clofe and dealt in dark Speeches and Parables. After Dinner, they went forth, they fayd, to in 1643. I 12 1643. Maiden & Married Life to look after the Horfes, but I think to fee London, and returned not till Supper. We got them Beds in a Houfe hard by, and darted at earlie Dawn. Mr. Milton kifled me moft ten- derlie agayn and agayn at parting, as though he feared to lofe me ; but it had feemed to me foe hard to brook the Delay of even a few Hours when Father, in his Sicknefle, was wanting me, that I took Leave of my Hufband with lefs Affection than I mighte have fhewn, and onlie began to find my Spiritts lighten when we were fairly quit of London, with its vile Sewers and Drains, and to breathe the fweete, pure Morning Ayre, as we rode fwiftlie along. Dick called London a vile Place, and fpake to Ralph concerning what they had feene of it overnighte, whence it appeared to me, that he had beene of Mary Powell. beene pleafure-feeking more than, in Father's State, he ought to have beene. But Dick was always a recklefs Lad ; and oh, what Joy, on reaching this deare Place, to find Father had onlie beene fufFering under one of his ufual Stomach Attacks, which have no Danger in them, and which Dick had exagger- ated, fearing Mr. Milton woulde not otherwife part with me ; I was a little mocked, and coulde not help fcolding him, though I was the Gainer; but he boldlie defended what he called his " Stratagem of " War," faying it was quite allow- able in dealing with a Puritan. As for Robin, he was wild with Joy when I arrived ; and hath never ceafed to hang about me. The other Children are riotous in their Mirth. Little Jofcelyn hath returned from his Fofter-mother's Farm, and is 1643. 1643. Monday. Maiden & Married Life is noe longer a puny Child 'tis thought he will thrive. I have him conftantly in my Arms or riding on my Shoulder ; and with Delight have revifited alle my olde Haunts, patted C/over, &c. Deare Mother is moft kind. The Maids as oft call me Mrs. Molly as Mrs. Milton, and then fmile, and beg Pardon. Rofe and Agnew have been here, and have made me promife to vifit Sheepfcote before I return to London. The whole Houfe feems full of Glee. It feemes quite ftrange to heare Dick and Harry imging loyal Songs and drinking the King's Health after foe recentlie hearing his M. foe continuallie fpoken agaynft. Alfo, to fee a Lad of Robin's Age, coming in and out at his Will, doing anie- thing or nothing ; inftead of being ever of Mary Powell. ever at his Tafkes, and looking at Meal-times as if he were repeating them to himfelfe. I know which I like heft. A moft kind Letter from Mr. Milton, hoping Father is better, and praying for News of him. How can I write to him without betraying Dick ? Robin and I rode, this Morning, to Sheepfcote. Thoughte Mr. Agnew received me with un- wonted Gravitie. He tolde me he had received a Letter from my Hufband, praying News of my Father, feeing I had fent him none, and that he had writ to him that Father was quite well, never had been better. Then he fayd to me he feared Mr. Milton was labouring under fome falfe Impreflion. I tolde him trulie, that Dick, to get me Home, had exaggerated a trifling Illnefs of Father s, but that I was guiltlefle 1643- u6 1643. Maiden & Married Life guiltlefle of it. He fayd Dick was inexcufable, and that noe good End coulde juftifie a Man of Honour in overcharging the Truth ; and that, fince I was innocent, I fhoulde write to my Hufband to clear myfelf. I faid briefly, I woulde ; and I mean to do foe, onlie not to-daye. Oh, fweet countrie Life ! I was made for you and none other. This riding and walking at one's owne free Will, in the frem pure Ayre, coming in to earlie, heartie, wholefome Meals, feafoned with harmlerTe Jefts, feeing frem Faces everie Daye come to the Houfe, knowing everie Face one meets out of Doores, fupping in the Garden, and remain- ing in the Ayre long after the Moon has rifen, talking, laughing, or per- haps dancing, if this be not Joy- fulnefle, what is ? For certain, I woulde that Mr. Milton of Mary Powell. Milton were here ; but he woulde call our Sports miftimed, and throw a Damp upon our Mirth by not joining in it. Soe I will enjoy my Holiday while it lafts, for it may be long ere I get another efpeciallie if his and Father s Opi- nions get wider afunder, as I think they are doing alreadie. My pro- mifed Spring Holiday may come to Nothing. My Hufband hath writ to me ftrangelie, chiding me mofl unkindlie for what was noe Fault of mine, to wit, Dick's Falfitie ; and wondering I can derive anie Pleafure from a Holiday fo obtayned, which he will not curtayl, but will on noe Pretence extend. Nay ! but methinks Mr. Milton prefumeth fomewhat too much on his marital Authoritie, writing in this Strayn. I am no mere 117 1643. Monday. n8 1643. Maiden & Married Life mere Child neither, nor a runaway Wife, nor in fuch bad Companie, in mine own Father's Houfe, where he firfte faw me ; and, was it anie Fault of mine, indeed, that Father was not ill ? or can I wim he had beene ? No, truly ! This Letter hath forelie vexed me. Dear Father, feeing me foe dulle, afkt me if I had had bad News. I fayd I had, for that Mr. Milton wanted me back at the Month's End. He fayd, lightlie, Oh, that muft not be, I muft at all Events flay over his Birthdaye, he could not fpare me fooner ; he woulde fettle all that. Let it be foe then I am content enoughe. To change the Current of my Thoughts, he hath renewed the Scheme for our Vifit to Lady Falk- land, which, Weather permitting, is to take Place to-morrow. 'Tis long of Mary Powell. i 19 long fince I have feene her, foe I 1643. am willing to goe ; but fhe is dearer to Rofe than to me, though I refpect her much. The whole of Yefterday occupyde Wednesday. with our Vifit. I love Lady Falk- land well, yet her religious Mellan- , chollie and Prefages of Evil have left a Weight upon my Spiritts. To-daye, we have a Family Dinner. The Agneiiis come not, but the Merediths doe: we mall have more Mirthe if lefs Wit. My Time now draweth foe fhort, I mufl crowd into it alle the Pleafure I can ; and in this, everie one confpires to help me, faying, " Poor Moll mufl foon " return to London" Never was Creature foe petted or fpoylt. How was it there was none of this before I married, when they might have me alwaies ? ah, therein lies the Secret. 120 1643. Sept. 21. Maiden & Married Life Secret. Now, we have mutuallie tafted our LofTe. Ralph Hewlett, going agayn to Town, was avifed to afk whether I had anie Commiffion wherewith to charge him. I bade him tell Mr. Milton that fince we mould meet foe foone, I need not write, but would keep alle my News for our Fire-fide. Robin added, " Say, " we cannot fpare her yet," and I Father echoed the fame. But I begin to feel now, that I muft not prolong my Stay. At the leafte, not beyond Father s Birthday. My Month is hafting to a Clofe. Battle at Newbury Lord Falk- land flayn . O h , fatal Lofs ! Father and Mother going off to my Lady : but I think me will not fee them. Aunt and Uncle Hewlett, who brought the News, can talk of Nothing elfe. Alle of Mary Powell. 121 Alle SadnefTe and Confternation. I am wearie of bad News, public and private, and feel lefs and lefs Love for the Puritans, yet am forced to feem more loyal than I really am, foe high runs party Feeling juft now at Home. My Month has parTed ! A moft difpleafed Letter from Sept. 28. my Hufband, minding me that my Leave of Abfence hath expired, and that he likes not the Meflages he received through Ralph, nor the unreafonable and hurtfulle Paf- times which he finds have beene making my quiet Home diftafte- fulle. Afking, are they fuitable, under Circumftances of nationall Confternation to my owne Party, or feemlie in foe young a Wife, apart from her Hufband ? To conclude, infifting, with more Authoritie than KindneiTe, 1 2 2 Maiden & Married Life l6 43- Kindnefle, on my immediate Re- turn. With Tears in my Eyes, I have beene to my Father. I have tolde him I muft goe. He fayth, Oh no, not yet. I perfifted, I muft, my Hufband was foe very angry. He rejoined, What, angry with my fweet Moll? and for fpending a few Days with her old Father ? Can it be ? hath it come to this alreadie ? I fayd, my Month had expired. He fayd, Nonfenfe, he had always afkt me to ftay over Michaelmaffe, till his Birthday; he knew Dick had named it to Mr. Milton. I fayd, Mr. Milton had taken no Notice thereof, but had onlie granted me a Month. He grew peevifh, and faid, " Pooh, " pooh ! " Thereat, after a Silence of a Minute or two, I fayd yet agayn, I muft goe. He took me by the two Wrifts and fayd, Doe you wim to of Mary Powell. to go ? I burft into Teares, but made noe Anfwer. He fayd, That is Anfwer enough, how doth this Puritan carry it with you, my Child? and fnatched his Letter. I fayd, Oh, don't read that, and would have drawn it back; but Father, when heated, is impoffible to controwl ; therefore, quite deaf to Entreaty, he would read the Letter, which was unfit for him in his chafed Mood ; then, holding it at Arm's Length, and fmiting it with his Fift, Ha ! and is it thus he dares addrefs a Daughter of mine ? (with Words added, I dare not write) but be quiet, Molly be at Peace, my Child, for he mall not have you back for awhile, even though he come to fetch you himfelf. The maddeft Thing I ever did was to give you to this Roundhead. He and Roger Agneiv talked me over with foe many fine 123 1643. 12 4 1643. Maiden & Married Life fine Words. What poflefled me, I know not. Your Mother always faid Evil woulde come of it. But as long as thy Father has a Roof over his Head, Child, thou haft a Home. As foone as he woulde hear me, I begged him not to take on foe, for that I was not an unhappy Wife ; but my Tears, he fayd, belied me ; and indeed, with Fear and Agitation, they flowed faft enough. But I fayd, I miift goe home, and wifhed I had gone fooner, and woulde he let Diggory take me ! No, he fayd, not a Man Jack on his Land fhoulde faddle a Horfe for me, nor would he lend me one, to carry me back to Mr. Milton ; at the leafte not for a While, till he had come to Reafon, and protefted he was forry for having writ to me foe harmly. " Soe be content, Moll, and make " not two Enemies, inftead of one. " Goe, of Mary Powell. " Goe, help thy Mother with her " clear- ftarching. Be happy whilfl " thou art here." But ah! more eafily faid than done. " Alle Joy is darkened; the " Mirthe of the Land is gone!" At Squire Pake's grand Dinner we have been counting on foe many Days; but it gave me not the Plea- fure expected. The Weather is foe foul that I am fure Mr. Milton woulde not like me to be on the Road, even would my Father let me goe. While writing the above, heard very angrie Voices in the Court- yard, my Father's efpeciallie, louder than common; and diftinguifhed the Words "Knave," and "Varlet," and " begone." Lookt from my Window and beheld a Man, booted and 125 1643. Michael- masse Day. Oct. 13. 126 Maiden & Married Life 1643- and cloaked, with two Horfes, at the Gate, parleying with my Father, who flood in an offeniive Attitude, and woulde not let him in. I could catch fuch Fragments as, "But, "Sir?" "What! in fuch Weather " as this?" " Nay, it had not over- " cart when I ftarted." "'Tis foul "enough now, then." "Let me " but have fpeech of my Miflrefs." " You crofTe not my Threfhold." " Nay, Sir, if but to give her this "Letter:" and turning his Head, I was avifed of its being Hubert, old Mr. Milton s Man; doubtlefs fent by my Hufband to fetch me. Seeing my Father raife his Hand in angrie Action (his Riding-whip being in it), I hafled down as fail as I coulde, to prevent Mifchiefe, as well as to get my Letter; but, unhappilie, not foe fleetlie as to fee more than Hubert's flying Skirts as he gallopped from of Mary Powell. from the Gate, with the led Horfe by the Bridle; while my Father, flinging downe the torne Letter, walked paffionatelie away. I clafped my Hands, and flood mazed for a While, was then avifed to piece the Letter, but could not; onlie making out fuch Words as "Sweet " Moll" in my Hufband's Writing. Rofe came this Morning, through Rain and Mire, at fome Rifk as well as much Inconvenience, to intreat of me, even with Teares, not to vex Mr. Milton by anie farther Delays, but to return to him as foon as pof- lible. Kind Soule, her Affection toucht me, and I allured her the more readilie I intended to return Home as foone as I coulde, which was not yet, my Father having taken the Matter into his own Hands, and permitting me noe Efcort ; 127 1643. Oct. 14, 128 1643. Oct. 23. Maiden & Married Life Efcort; but that I queftioned not, Mr. Milton was onlie awaiting the Weather to fettle, to fetch me him- felf. That he will doe fo, is my firm Perfuafion. Meanwhile, I make it my Duty to joyn with fome Attempt at CheerfullenelTe in the Amufements of others, to make my Father's Confinement to the Houfe lefs irkfome ; and have in fome Meafure fucceeded. Noe Sighte nor Tidings of Mr. Milton. I am uneaiie, frighted at myfelf, and wifh I had never left him, yet hurte at the Neglect. Hubert, being a crabbed Temper, made Mifchief on his Return, I fancy. Father is vexed, methinks, at his owne Paffion, and hath never, direcllie, fpoken, in my Hear- inge, of what pafTed; but rayleth continuallie agaynft Rebels and Roundheads. of Mary Powell. Roundheads. As to Mother, ah me! Thro' dank and miry Lanes and Bye-roads with Robin, to Sheepfcote. Waiting for Rofe in Mr. Agnews fmall Studdy, where me moftlie fitteth with him, oft acting as his Amanuenfis, was avifed to take up a printed Sheet of Paper that lay on the Table; but finding it to be of Latin Verfing, was about to laye it downe agayn, when Rofe came in. She changed Colour, and in a falter- ing Voice fayd, "Ah, Coujin, do "you know what that is? One of " your Hufband's Proofe Sheets. I " woulde that it coulde intereft you " in like Manner as it hath me." Made her noe Anfwer, laying it afide unconcernedlie, but fecretlie felt, as I have oft done before, how ftupid it is not to know Latin, and refolved v: tO 129 1643. Oct. 24. 130 1643. Oct. 28. Oct. 31. Maiden & Married Life to get Robin to teach me. He is no greate Scholar himfelfe, foe will not fhame me. I am wearie of hearing of War and Politicks ; foe will try Studdy for a While, and fee if 'twill cure this dull Payn at my Heart. Robin and I have fhut ourfelves up for three Hours dailie, in the fmall Book-room, and have made fay re Progreffe. He liketh his Office of Tutor mightilie. My Leflbns are more crabbed, or I am more dull and inattentive, for I cannot fix my Minde on my Book, and am fecretlie wearie. Robin wearies too. But I will not give up as yet ; the more foe as in this quiete Studdy I am out of Sighte and Hearinge of fundrie young Officers Dick is continuallie bringing over from Oxford, who fpend manie Hours of Mary Powell. Hours with him in Countrie Sports, and then come into the Houfe, hun- gry, thirftie, noifie, and idle. I know Mr. Milton woulde not like them. Surelie he will come foone ? I fayd to Father laft Night, I wanted to hear from Home. He fayd, "Home! Don: call yon Taylor's " Shop your Home ? " foe ironicalle that I was mamed to fay more. Woulde that I had never married ! then coulde I enjoy my Child- hoode's Home. Yet I knew not its Value before I quitted it, and had even a ftupid Pleafure in anticipating another. Ah me! had I loved Mr. Milton more, perhaps I might better have endured the Taylor's Shop. Sheepfcote, Nov. 20. Annoyed by Dick's Companions, I prayed Father to let me flay awhile with Rofe ; and gaining his Confent, came 1643. Nov. 20. 1643. Maiden & Married Life came over here Yefter-morn, with- out thinking it needfulle to fend Notice, which was perhaps incon- fiderate. But fhe received me with Kiffes and Words of Tenderneffe, though lefs Smiling than ufualle, and eagerlie accepted mine offered Vifitt. Then fhe ran off to find Roger, and I heard them talking earneftlie in a low Voice before they came in. His Face was grave, even ftern, when he entred, but he held out his Hand, and fayd, " Miftrefs " Milton, you are welcome ! how is " it with you ? and how was Mr. " Milton when he wrote to you "laft?" I anfwered brieflie, he was well: then came a Silence, and then Rofe took me to my Chamber, which was fweet with Lavender, and its Hangings of the whiteft. It reminded me too much of my firft Week of Marriage, foe I refolved to think not of Mary Powell. not at all left I fhoulde be bad Companie, but cheer up and be gay. Soe I afkt Rofe a thoufand Queftions about her Dairie and Bees, laught much at Dinner, and told Mr. Agnevo fundrie of the merrie Sayings of Dick and his Oxford Friends. And, for my Reward, when we were afterwards apart, I heard him tell Rofe (by Reafon of the Walls being thin) that however me might regard me for old Affection's Sake, he thought he had never knowne foe unpromifing a Character. This made me dulle enoughe all the reft of the Evening, and repent having come to Sheepjcote: however, he liked me the better for being quiete : and Rofe, being equallie chekt, we fewed in Silence while he read to us the firft Divifion of Spencer's Legend of HolineJJe, about Una and the Knight, and how they got fun- dered 1643. '34 1643. Maiden & Married Life dered. This led to much ferious, yet not unpleafing, Difcourfe, which lafted till Supper. For the firft Time at Sheepfcote, I coulde not eat, which Mr. Agnew obferving, preft me to take Wine, and Rofe woulde ftart up to fetch fome of her Pre- ferves; but I chekt her with a Motion, not being quite able to fpeak; for their being foe kind made the Teares ready to flarte, I knew not wly. Family Prayers, after Supper, rather too long; yet though I coulde not keep up my Attention, they feemed to fpread a Calm and a Peace alle about, that extended even to me; and though, after I had undreffed, I fat a long While in a Maze, and bethought me how pi- teous a Creature I was, yet, once layed down, I never fank into deeper, more compofing Sleep. This of Mary Powell. This Morning, Rofe exclaimed, "Dear Roger! onlie think! Moll " has begun to learn Latin fince me " returned to Foreft Hill, thinking " to furprife Mr. Milton when they " meet/' " She will not onlie fur- " prife, but pleafe him," returned dear Roger, taking my Hand very kindlie; "I can onlie fay, I hope " they will meet long before me " can read his Poemata, unlefs me " learnes much fafter than moil " People." I replied, I learned very flowly, and wearied Robin's Patience; on which Rofe, kiffing me, cried, " You will never wearie mine; foe, if you pleafe, deare Moll, we will goe to our Leilbns here everie Morning, and it may " be that I mail get you through the Grammar fatter than Robin can. If we come to anie Diffi- " cultie we mail refer it to Roger." Now, 1643. Nov. 21. 136 1643- Maiden & Married Life Now, Mr. Agnew's Looks expreft fuch Pleafure with both, that it were difficult to tell which felt the moft elated; foe calling me deare Moll (he hath hitherto Miftrefs Miltoned me ever fince I fett Foot in his Houfe), he fayed he would not interrupt our Studdies, though he mould be within Call, and foe left us. I had not felt foe happy fince Father's Birthday ; and, though Rofe kept me clofe to my Book for two Hours, I found her a far lefs irkfome Tutor than deare Robin. Then me went away, finging, to make Roger's favourite Dim, and afterwards we tooke a brifk Walke, and came Home hungrie enoughe to Dinner. There is a daily Beauty in Rofe's Life, that I not onlie admire, but am readie to envy. Oh! if Milton lived but in the pooreft Houfe in the of Mary Powell. 137 the Countrie, methinks I coulde be 1643. very happy with him. Chancing to make the above Bedtime. Remark to Rofe, me cried, " And " why not be happy with him in " Alderfgate Street?" I briefly re- plied that he muil get the Houfe firft, before it were poffible to tell whether I coulde be happy there or not. Rofe flared, and exclaimed, " Why, where do you fuppofe him "to be now?" "Where but at " the Taylor's in Bride's Church- "yard?" I replied. She clafpt her Hands with a Look I mail never forget, and exclaimed in a Sort of vehement Paffion, " Oh, Coufin, " Coujin, how you throw your own " HappinefTe away ! How awfulle " a Paufe muft have taken place in " your Intercourfe with the Man " whom you promifed to abide by " till 138 Maiden & Married Life 1643. " till Death, iince you know not " that he has long fince taken Pof- " feffion of his new Home ; that he " ftrove to have it ready for you at " Michaelma/e!" Doubtleffe I lookt noe lefs fur- prifed than I felt ; a fuddain Prick at the Heart prevented Speech ; but it mot acrofle my Heart that I had made out the Words " Alderf- " gafe" and "new Home," in the Fragments of the Letter my Father had torn. Rofe, mifjudging my Silence, burft forth anew with, " Oh, " Coufin! Coujin! coulde anie Home, " however dull and noifefome, drive "me from Roger Agnewf Onlie " think of what you are doing, of " what you are leaving undone ! " of what you are preparing againft "yourfelf! To put the Wicked- " neffe of a felfifh Courfe out of the " Account, onlie think of its Mellan- " cholie, of Mary Powell. " cholie, its Miferie, defKtute of " alle the fweet, bright, freih Well- " fprings of HappinerTe ; unbleft "by God!" Here Rofe wept paffionatelie, and clafpt her Arms about me ; but, when I began to fpeak, and to tell her of much that had made me miferable, me hearkened in motion- leffe Silence, till I told her that Father had torn the Letter and beaten the MelTenger. Then me cried, " Oh, I fee now what may and mall " be done ! Roger mall be Peace- " maker," and ran off with Joyful- nefle ; I not withholding her. But I can never be joyfulle more he cannot be Day's-man betwixt us now 'tis alle too late ! Now that I am at Fore/I Hill agayn, I will eflay to continue my Journalling. Mr. 1643. Nov. 28. 140 1643. Maiden & Married Life Mr. Agnew was out ; and though a keene wintry Wind was blowing, and Rofe was fuffering from Colde, yet me went out to liften for his Horfe's Feet at the Gate, with onlie her Apron cart over her Head. Shortlie, he returned ; and I heard him fay in a troubled Voice, " Alle " are in Arms at For eft Hill" I felt foe greatlie mocked as to neede to fit downe inftead of running forthe to learn the News. I fuppofed the parliamentarian Soldiers had ad- vanced, unexpectedlie, upon Oxford. His next Words were, " Dick is " coming for her at Noone poor " Soul, I know not what fhe will " doe her Father will truft her " noe longer with you and me." Then I faw them both paife the Window, flowlie pacing together, and battened forth to joyn them ; but they had turned into the pleached Alley, of Mary Powell. 141 Alley, their Backs towards me; and 1643. both in fuch earneft and apparentlie private Communication, that I dared not interrupt them till they turned aboute, which was not for fome While ; for they flood for fome Time at the Head of the Alley, ftill with theire Backs to me, Rofes Hair blowing in the cold Wind ; and once or twice me feemed to put her Kerchief to her Eyes. Now, while I flood mazed and uncertain, I hearde a diflant Clatter of Horfe's Feet, on the hard Road a good Way off, and could defcrie Dick coming towards Sheepfcote. Rofe faw him too, and commenced running towards me; Mr. Agnew following with long Strides. Rofe drew me back into the Houfe, and fayd, kiffing me, " Dearefl Moll, I " am foe forry ; Roger hath feen " your Father this Morn, and he " will 142 Maiden & Married Life i6 43 . " will on no Account fpare you to " us anie longer ; and Dick is coming " to fetch you even now." I fayd, " Is Father ill?" "Oh no," replied "Mr.jUgnew; then coming up, "He " is not ill, but he is perturbed at " fome thing which has occurred; " and, in Truth, foe am I. But " remember, Miflrefs Milton, re- " member, dear Coujin y that when " you married, your Father s Guar- " dianfhip of you palTed into the " Hands of your Hufband your " Hufband's Houfe was thenceforthe "your Home; and in quitting it " you committed a Fault you may " yet repaire, though this ofFenfive " AcT: has made the Difficultie much "greater." "Oh, what has hap- "pened?" I impatientlie cried. Juft then, Dick comes in with his ufual blunt Salutations, and then cries, "Well, Moll, are you ready "to of Mary Powell. "to goe back?' 5 "Why fhould I "be?" I fayd, "when I am foe "happy here? unlefs Father is ill, " or Mr. Agnew and Rofe are tired " of me." They both interrupted, there was Nothing they foe much delired, at this prefent, as that I fhoulde prolong my Stay. And you know, Dick t I added, that Foreft Hill is not foe pleafant to me juft now as it hath commonlie beene, by Reafon of your Oxford Companions. He brieflie fayd, I neede not mind that, they were coming no more to the Houfe, Father had decreed it. And you know well enough, Mo//, that what Father decrees, muft be, and he hath decreed that you muft come Home now; foe no more Ado, I pray you, but fetch your Cloak and Hood, and the Horfes mail come round, for 'twill be late ere we reach Home, " Nay, you "muft 1643. 1 44 Maiden & Married Life 1643. " muft dine here at all Events," fayd Rofe ; "I know, Dick, you love " roaft Pork." Soe Dick relented. Soe Rofe, turning to me, prayed me to bid Cicely haften Dinner; the which I did, tho' thinking it ftrange Rofe mould not goe herfelf. But, as I returned, I hearde her fay, Not a Word of it, dear Dick, at the leaft, till after Dinner, left you fpoil her Appetite. Soe Dick fayd he fhoulde goe and look after the Horfes. I fayd then, brifklie, I fee fomewhat is the Matter pray tell me what it is. But Rofe looked quite dull, and walked to the Window. Then Mr. Agnew fayd, " You feem as difTa- " tisfied to leave us, Coujin, as we "are to lofe you; and yet you are " going back to Foreji Hill to that " Home in which you will doubt- " leffe be happy to live all your "Dayes." "At Foreji Hill?'' I fayd, of Mary Powell. fayd, "Oh no! I hope not." " And " why ? " fayd he quicklie. I hung my Head, and muttered, " I hope, " fome Daye, to goe back to Mr. " Milton." " And why not at " once?" fayd he. I fayd, " Father " would not let me." " Nay, that " is Childifh," he anfwered, " your " Father could not hinder you if " you wanted not the Mind to goe " it was your firft feeming foe " loth to return, that made him " think you unhappie and refufe to "part with you." I fayd, "And " what if I were unhappie?" He paufed; and knew not at the Moment what Anfwer to make, but fhortlie replyed by another Queftion, " What " Caufe had you to be foe?" I fayd, " That was more eaiily afkt than " anfwered, even if there were anie " Neede I fhoulde anfwer it, or he " had anie Right to afk it." He cried in H5 1643. 146 1643. Maiden & Married Life in an Accent of TendernefTe that ftill wrings my Heart to remember, " Oh, queftion not the Right ! I " only wim to make you happy. " Were you not happy with Mr. " Milton during the Week you fpent *' together here at Sheepfcote?" Thereat I coulde not refrayn from burfting into Tears. Rofe now fprang forward ; but Mr. Agnew fayd, " Let her weep, let her weep, " it will do her good." Then, alle at once it occurred to me that my Hufband was awaiting me at Home, and I cried, " Oh, is Mr. Milton at " Forejl Hi/I?" and felt my Heart full of Gladnefs. Mr. Agnew an- fwered, "Not foe, not foe, poor "^Mo//:" and, looking up at him, I faw him wiping his Brow, though the Daye was foe chill. " As well " tell her now," fayd he to Rofe; and then taking my Hand, " Oh, " Mrs. of Mary Powell. " Mrs. Milton, can you wonder that " your Hufband mould be angry ? " How can you wonder at anie Evil " that may refult from the Provoca- " tion you have given him? What " Marvell, that lince you caft him " off, all the fweet Fountains of " his Affections would be embittered, " and that he mould retaliate by " feeking a Separation, and even a "Divorce?" There I ftopt him with an Outcry of "Divorce?" " Even foe," he moft mournfully replyd, " and I feeke not to excufe " him, fince two Wrongs make not " a Right." " But," I cried, paf- fionately weeping, " I have given " him noe Caufe ; my Heart has " never for a Moment ftrayed to " another, nor does he, I am fure, " exped: it." " Ne'erthelefTe," en- joyned Mr. Agneiv, " he is foe " aggrieved and chafed, that he has " followed 1643. 148 1643. Maiden & Married Life " followed up what he confiders " your Breach of the Marriage " Contrail by writing and publiming " a Book on Divorce; the Tenor " of which coming to your Father's " Ears, has violently incenfed him. " And now, dear Coujin, having, by " your Waywardnefs, kindled this " Flame, what remains for you but " to nay, hear me, hear me, Moll, " for Dick is coming in, and I may " not let him hear me urge you to " the onlie Courfe that can regayn " your Peace Mr. Milton is ftill "your Hufband; cache of you have " now Something to forgive; do "you be the firfte; nay, feeke his " Forgivenefle, and you mail be " happier than you have been yet." But I was weeping without Controule; and Dick coming in, and with Dick the Dinner, I afkt to be excufed, and foe foughte my Chamber, of Mary Powell. 149 Chamber, to weep there without Reftraynt or Witneffe. Poor Rofe came up, as foone as me coulde leave the Table, and told me me had eaten as little as I, and woulde not even preffe me to eat. But me careft me and comforted me, and urged in her owne tender Way alle that had beene fayd by Mr. Agnew; even protefting that if me were in my Place, me woulde not goe back to Foreji Hill, but flraight to London, to entreat with Mr. Milton for his Mercy. But I told her I could not do that, even had I the Means for the Journey; for that my Heart was turned againfl the Man who coulde, for the venial Offence of a young Wife, in abiding too long with her old Father, not onlie cafl her off from his Love, but hold her up to the World's Blame and Scorn, I by making their domeflic Quarrel the 1643. 150 1643. Maiden G? Married Life the Matter for a printed Attack. Rofe fayd, " I admit he is wrong, " but indeed, indeed, Moll, you are " wrong too, and you were wrong " firji:" and me fayd this foe often, that at length we came to crofter Words; when Dick, calling to me from below, would have me make hafte, which I was glad to doe, and left Sheepfcote lefs regrettfullie than I had expected. Rofe kifl me with her gravefl Face. Mr. Agnew put me on my Horfe, and fayd, as he gave me the Rein, "Now think! "now think! even yet! "and then, as I lilently rode off, " God blefs " you." I held down my Head; but, at the Turn of the Road, lookt back, and faw him and Rofe watching us from the Porch. Dick cried, " I am righte glad we are off at laft, " for Father is downright crazie "aboute of Mary Powell. " aboute this BufinerTe, and miftruft- fulle of Agnews Influence over you," and would have gone on railing, but I bade him for Pitie's Sake be quiete. The Effects of my owne Follie, the LolTe of Home, Hufband, Name, the Opinion of the Agnews, the Opinion of the Worlde, rofe up agaynft me, and almoft drove me mad. And, juft as I was thinking I had better lived out my Dayes and dyed earlie in Bride's Churchyarde than that alle this mould have come about, the fuddain Recollection of what Rofe had that Morning tolde me, which foe manie other Thoughts had driven out of my Head, viz. that Mr. Milton had, in his Defire to pleafe me, while I was onlie bent on pleafing myfelf, been fecretly ftrivingto make readie the Alderfgate Street Houfe agaynft my Return, foe 1643. I 5 2 1643. 1644. March 25. Maiden & Married Life foe overcame me, that I wept as I rode along. Nay, at the Corner of a branch Road, had a Mind to beg Dick to let me goe to London; but a Glance at his dogged Countenance fufficed to forefhow my Anfwer. Half dead with Fatigue and Griefe when I reached Home, the tender Embraces of my Father and Mother completed the Overthrowe of my Spiritts. I tooke to my Bed ; and this is the firft Daye I have left it; nor will they let me fend for Rofe, nor even tell her I am ill. The new Year opens drearilie, on Affairs both publick and private. The Loaf parted at Breakfaft this Morning, which, as the Saying goes, is a Sign of Separation ; but Mother onlie fayd 'twas becaufe it was badly kneaded, and chid Margery. She hath beene telling me, but now, how of Mary Powell. how I mighte have 'leaped all my Troubles, and feene as much as I woulde of her and Father, and yet have contented Mr. Milton and beene counted a good Wife. Noe Advice foe ill to bear as that which comes too late. I am fick of this journalling, foe mall onlie put downe the Date of Robin s leaving Home. Lord have Mercy on him, and keepe him in Safetie. This is a fhorte Prayer; therefore, eaiier to be often re- peated. When he kiffed me, he whifpered, " Moll, pray for me." Father does not feeme to mifs Robin much, tho' he dailie drinks his Health after that of the King. Perhaps he did not mifs me anie more when I was in London, though it was true and naturall enough he mould '53 1644. 29th. '54 1644. Maiden & Married Life mould like to fee me agayn. We fhould have beene ufed to our Sepa- ration by this Time ; there would have beene Nothing corroding in it I pray for Robin everie Night. Since he went, the Houfe has lofl its Sunmine. When I was foe anxious to return to Foreft Hill, I never counted on his leaving it. Oh me, what would I give to fee the Skirts of Mr. Milton's Garments agayn ! My Heart is lick unto Death. I have been reading fome of my Journal!, and tearing out much childifh Nonfenfe at the Beginning ; but coulde not deftroy the painfulle Records of the laft Year. How unhappy a Creature am I ! wearie, wearie of my Life, yet no Ways inclined for Death. Lord, have Mercy upon me. I of Mary Powell. I fpend much of my Time, now, in the Book-room, and, though I effay not to purfue the Latin, I read much Englijh, at the leaft, more than ever I did in my Life before ; but often I fancy I am reading when I am onlie dreaming. Oxford is far too gay a Place for me now ever to goe neare it, but my Brothers are much there, and Father in his Farm, and Mother in her Kitchen ; and the Neighbours, when they call, look on me ftrangelie, fo that I have noe Love for them. How different is Rofe's holy, fecluded, yet cheerefulle Life at Sheepfcote! She hath a Nurferie now, foe cannot come to me, and Father likes not I mould goe to her. They fay their Majeftyes' Parting at Abingdon was very forrowfulle and tender. The Lord fend them better 1644. April 3. S th. I 5 6 1644. April 10. Maiden & Married Life better Times! The Queen is to my Mind a moil charming Lady, and well worthy of his Majefty's Affe&ion; yet it feems to me amifle, that thro' her Influence, laft Sum- mer, the Opportunitie of Pacifica- tion was loft. But me was elated, and naturallie enoughe, at her per- fonall Succeffes from the Time of her landing. To me, there feems Nothing foe good as Peace. I know, indeede, Mr. Milton holds that there may be fuch Things as a holy War and a curfed Peace. Father, having a Hoarfenefs, hath deputed me, of late, to read the Morning and Evening Prayers. How beautifulle is our Liturgie ! I grudge at the Puritans for having abolifhed it; and though I felt not its comprehenfive Fullnefle before I married, nor indeed till now, yet I of Mary Powell. I wearied to Death in London at the puritanicall Ordinances and Confcience-meetings and extempore Prayers, wherein it was foe oft the Speaker's Care to mow Men how godly he was. Nay, I think Mr. Milton altogether wrong in the View he takes of praying to God in other Men's Words; for doth he not doe foe, everie Time he followeth the Senfe of another Man's extempore Prayer, wherein he is more at his Mercy and Caprice than when he hath a printed Form fet down, wherein he fees what is coming? Walking in the Home-clofe this Morning, it occurred to me that Mr. Milton intended bringing me to Forefl Hill about this Time ; and that if I had abided patientlie with him through the Winter, we might now have beene both here happily together; 1644. June 8. , 5 8 1644. June 23. Maiden & Married Life together ; untroubled by that Sting which nowpoifons everie Enjoyment of mine, and perhaps of his. Lord, be merciful to me a Sinner. Juft after writing the above, I was in the Garden, gathering a few Coronation Flowers and Sops-in- Wine, and thinking they were of deeper Crimfon at Sheepfcote, and wondering what Rofe was juft then about, and whether had I beene born in her Place, I fhoulde have beene as goode and happy as me, when Harry came up, looking fome- what grave. I fayd, " What is "the Matter?" He gave Anfwer, " Rofe hath loft her Child." Oh ! - that we mould live but a two Hours' Journey apart, and that me coulde lofe a Child three Months olde whom I had never feene ? I ran to Father, and never left off praying of Mary Powell. praying him to let me goe to her till he confented. What, and if I had begged as hard, at the firfte, to goe back to Mr. Milton? might he not have confented then? . . . Soe Harry took me ; and as we drew neare Sheepfcote, I was avifed to think how grave, how barely friendlie had beene our lafl Parting ; and to ponder, would Rofe make me welcome now ? The Infant, Harry tolde me, had beene dead fome Dayes ; and, as we came in Sight of the little grey old Church, we faw a Knot of People coming out of the Churchyard, and guefTed the Baby had juft beene buried. Soe it proved Mr. Agnew's Houfe- door flood ajar; and when we tapped foftlie and Cicely admitted us, we could fee him ftanding by Rofe, who was fitting on the Ground and 1644. i6o 1644. Maiden & Married Life and crying as if me would not be comforted. When me hearde my Voice, me ftarted up, flung her Arms about me, crying more bitterlie than before, and I cried too ; and Mr. Agnew went away with Harry. Then Rofe fayd to me, " You muft " not leave me agayn." . . . .... In the Cool of the Evening, when Harry had left us, me took me into the Churchyarde, and fcat- tered the little Grave with Flowers; and then continued fitting belide it on the GrafTe, quiete, but not com- fortleile. I am avifed to think me prayed. Then Mr. Agnew came forthe and fate on a flat Tombftone hard by ; and without one Word of Introduction took out his Pfalter, and commenced reading the Pfalms for that Evening's Service ; to wit, the 41 ft, the 42d, the 43de ; in a low folemne Voice ; and methoughte I of Mary Powell. I never in my Life hearde aniething to equall it in the Way of Confola- tion. Rofe's heavie Eyes graduallie lookt up from the Ground into her Hufband's Face, and thence up to Heaven. After this, he read, or rather repeated, the Collect at the end of the Buriall Service, putting this Expreffion, " As our Hope is, " this our deare Infant doth." Then he went on to fay in a foothing Tone, " There hath noe Misfortune " happened to us, but fuch as is " common to the Lot of alle Men. " We are alle Sinners, even to the " youngeft, fayreft, and feeminglie " purer! among us ; and Death " entered the World by Sin, and, " conftituted as we are, we would " not, even if we could, difpenfe " with Death. For, where doth it " convey us ? From this burthen- " fome, miferable World, into the " generall M 161 1644. l62 1644. Maiden Gf Married Life generall AfTemblie of Chrift's Firft- born, to be united with the Spiritts of the Juft made perfect, to par- take of everie Enjoyment which in this World is unconnected with Sin, together with others that are unknowne and unfpeakable. And there, we mall agayn have Bodies as well as Soules ; Eyes to fee, but not to fhed Tears; Voices to fpeak and fing, not to utter La- mentations ; Hands, to doe God's Work ; Feet, and it may be, Wings, to carry us on his Errands. Such will be the Bleflednefs of his glorified Saints ; even of thofe who, having been Servants of Satan till the eleventh Hour, laboured penitentlie and diligentlie for their heavenlie Mailer one Hour before Sunfet; but as for thofe who, dying in mere Infancie, never committed actuall Sin, they " follow of Mary Powell. 163 " follow the Lamb whitherfoever ! 1644. " he goeth ! ' Oh, think of this, " dear Rofe, and forrow not as thofe " without Hope ; for be aflured, " your Child hath more reall Reafon " to be grieved for you, than you " for him: " With this, and like Difcourfe, that diftilled like the Dew, or the fmall Rain on the tender GraiTe, did Roger Agneiv comfort his Wife, untill the Moon had rifen. Likewife he fpake to us of thofe who lay buried arounde, how one had died of a broken Heart, another of fud- dain Joy, another had let Patience have her perfect Work through Years of lingering Difeafe. Then we walked flowlie and compofedlie Home, and ate our Supper peace- fullie, Rofe not refufing to eat, though me took but little. Since that Evening, me hath, at 164 1644. Maiden & Married Life at Mr. Agnews Wifh, gone much among the Poor, reading to one, working for another, carrying Food and Medicine to another ; and in this I have borne her Companie. I like it well. Methinks how pleafant and feemlie are the Duties of a country Minister's Wife ! a God-fearing Woman, that is, who confidereth the Poor and Needy, infleade of aiming to be frounced and purfled like her richer! Neigh- bours. Mr. Agnew was reading to us, lafl Night, of Bernard Gilpin he of whom the Lord Burleigb fayd, " Who can blame that Man for not " accepting a Bimopric ? " How charmed were we with the Defcrip- tion of the Simplicitie and Hofpital- itie of his Method of living at Houghton ! There is another Place of nearlie the fame Name, in Buckingham/hire not Houghton, but Horton, of Mary Powell. Horton, .... where one Mr. John Milton fpent five of the beft Years of his Life, and where methinks his Wife could have been happier with him than in Bride's Church- yarde. But it profits not to wifh and to will. What was to be, had Need to be, foe there's an End. Mr. Agnew fayd to me this Morn- ing, fomewhat gravelie, " I obferve, " Coujin, you feem to confider your- " felfe the Victim of Circumstances." " And am I not ? " I replied. " No," he anfwered, " Circumflance is a " falfe God, unrecognifed by the " Chriftian, who contemns him, and " makes him though a Stubborn " yet a profitable Servant." " That " may be alle very grand for a Man " to doe," I fayd. " Very grand, " but very feafible, for a Woman as " well as a Man," rejoined Mr. 1644. Aug. i. i66 1644. Maiden & Married Life " and we mall be driven to " the Wall alle our Lives, unlefs we " have this victorious Struggle with " Circumftances. I feldorn allude, " Coufin, to yours, which are almofte " too delicate for me to meddle " with ; and yet I hardlie feele "juftified in letting foe many Op- " portunities efcape. Do I offend ? " or may I go on ? Onlie think, " then, how voluntarilie you have " placed yourfelf in your prefent " uncomfortable Situation. The " Tree cannot refifl the graduall " Growth of the Mofs upon it ; " but you might, anie Day, anie " Hour, have freed yourfelf from " the equallie graduall Formation " of the Net that has enclofed you " at laft. You entered too haftilie "into your firfte nay, let that " pafs, you gave too fhorte a " Triall of your new Home before " you of Mary Powell. " you became difgufted with it. " Admit it to have beene dull, even " unhealthfulle, were you juftified " in forfaking it at a Month's " End ? But your Hufband gave " you Leave of Abfence, though " obtayned on falfe Pretences. " When you found them to be falfe, while the Doctor and I walked on. I could not help re- flecting how odd it was, that I, whom Nature had endowed with fuch a very ordinarie Capacitie, and fcarce anie Tafte for Letters, ihoulde continuallie be thrown into the Companie of the clevereft of Men, firfl, Mr. Milton ; then Mr. Agne