UNIVEESIT7

THE

WEST POINT SCRAP BOOR

A COLLECTION OF

Stories, Songs, and Legends

ITED STATES MILITARY ACADEMY,

WITH ORIGINAL ILLUSTRATIONS.

LIEUT. OLIVER E. WOOD, U. S. ARMY.

- ^^

NEW YORK :
VAN NOSTRAND, PUBLISHEB,

23 MCRRAY AND 27 WARRKX STREET.

1871.

Entered according to act of Congress, in the year 1871, by
D. VAN NOSTRAXD,

fy~L/0 6> D

in the Office of the Librarian of Congress at Washington.

TO THE

GEADUATES

OF THE

U. S. MILITARY ACADEMY,

THIS VOLUME

is
RESPECTFULLY DEDICATED,

THE AUTHOR.

PREFACE.

IN presenting this volume to the public, a few explan-
tory words will not be out of place.

The collection was made by the Author, at first, with-
ut any intention of having it published, but at the
rnest solicitation of many friends, most of them Grada-
tes, it now appears in print, and it is hoped will bring
p many pleasant reminiscences to those who have left
eir Alma Mater.

As many of the authors of contributed pieces have
desired that their names should be withheld from the
public, it has been considered advisable to refrain from
giving any names.

The Author desires to return his most sincere thanks
o Mr. Julian Scott, of Xew York, who has rendered
invaluable assistance in preparing some of the wood-cuts
for the press.

He also wishes to return his heartfelt thanks for the
any contributions he has received, and for the hearty
support and the warm interest that has been manifested

PREFACE.

by all those with whom he has been thrown in contact
during the time he has been engaged in the work.

0. E. W.

FOBT SULLIVAN, MAINE, September 1st, 1871.

CONTENTS.

PAGE

DESCRIPTION OF WEST POINT 13

REMINISCENCES OF OLDEN TIMES 29

THE ATTEMPT TO BOMBARD THE SUPERINTENDENT'S HOUSE 29

THE ATTEMPT TO BLOW UP THE OLD NORTH BARRACKS 30

ESPIONAGE OVER THE CADETS 31

MKSS HALL REMINISCENCES 34

OUR OLD COMMANDANT 35

THE BURIAL OF A CADET 39

DISAPPOINTMENT AND REFORM (A PLAT) 41

MAJOR BOB G 45

FURLOUGH SONG OF 1829 46

THE FOUR CLOCKS 48

FANNY ELLSLER'S PIROUETTE BY MOONLIGHT 49

BENNY HAVENS,' OH! 59

A FRAGMENT 64

WEST POINT EXPERIENCE 65

ARMY HYMN 67

A SONNET TO "ANALYTICAL" 67

REPLY TO WEST POINT EXPERIENCE 68

SLIGHT INVECTIVE AGAINST MECHANICS 71

\ I'ERSIGN 72

RADIATING CLASS SONG OF 1848 76

EST POINT LIFE 77

E CADET'S BABY 95

SHOULDER STRAPS 107

REM; BY AN OLD GRADUATE ios

IP FROM THE ' SECTION-ROOM" 116

RETURN OF THE FURLOUGH CLASS OF 1850 116

Y FIRST NIGHT ON POST 117

E RETURNED FURLOUGH-MAN 123

PARODY ON HOH EM. I NDEN 124

OLD CADET'S ADVICE 1-J3

URLOUGH SuNG oF 1859 12S

CITIZEN'S IDEA OF DRESS PARADE 129

THE ARMY BLUE t ou> VERSION) 132

ILLfc . . 133

8 CONTENTS.

PAGE

RECOLLECTIONS OF THE RIDING-HALL 134

ODE TO C. M. W 137

EXTRACT 138

" MERCOOK" 138

DREAMS OF THE DRAWING ACADEMY 139

DO NOT FILL A SOLDIER'S GRAVE 140

MOLECULES 142

DARKER HERE ! 142

"PHIL." 143

A SLIGHT TRANSPOSITION 143

AN EVENING'S REVERIE 144

ON THE SUBJECT OF "BREAKS" 148

THE YOUNG DRAGOON 150

POETRY OF CADET LIFE 151

DESCRIPTION OF A CADET HOP 153

THE GHOST OF "POLLY H." 156

AN IMITATION 159

BULLY FOR ALL 161

A CADET HASH 162

"GIRT SIMMER KOOK" 167

SCENE IN THE COMMANDANT'S'OFFICE 168

DOMESTIC CALCULUS 169

A SECOND MUNCHAUSEN 169

THE VERY SORROWFUL NARRATIVE OF FRANK DAVENPORT 171

THE GROCERY-MAN 181

POETICAL EFFUSION BY A PLEBE 182

THE ARMY BLUE (SONG OF 1865} 183

EPITAPH ON "OLD L " 184

MY EQUESTRIAN EXPERIENCE 184

A DIABOLICAL EXTRACT 191

CARMEN AD TERRY 192

MY PIPE AND 1 193

THE BILLY-GOAT 194

"DADEGAN'S HIVE" 197

MEDITATIONS BY ONE TURTLE 200

CAMP OF '66 200

TE ROGAMUS 201

MOTHER GOOSE, No. 2 204

A LAMENTABLE BALLAD 205

THE " RAVING " 207

THE FAMOUS BILLIARD-TABLE 209

WHERE HUDSON'S WAVE 214

"KEEN" FROM THE MESS 215

EXPERIMENTS 16

CONUNDRUM 216

" AITCH EM BEE" 117

PRIVATE THEATRICALS :217

CONTENTS.

PAGE

THE ALCHEMIST ......................................................................... :4

THE CADET'S SUNDAY .................................................................. 225

THE RI<; MENA<;ERIE ................................................................... 218

A GENUINE CADET " HASH " ........................................................... 231

DESCRIPTION OF CAM!' LOOKOUT ....................................................... 235

OUR ALMA MATER ...................................................................... 1^7

BE<;<;IN<; I-ARDON OF THE MOUNTED SERVICE, ETC ................................... 238

FOURTEENTH <>F APRIL, 1867 ........................................................... 239

ItoN VoYA<iE ............................................................................ 240

MY OLD "REVEILLES" ............................................................... 242

CONUNDRUM ............................................................................. 24:;

YE SPOONEY MAN'S" LAMENT ........................................................ 244

GRAXD ENTERTAINMENT ................................................................ 247

BUTTONS ON THE BRAIN ................................................................ 248

You AND 1 .............................................................................. 251

AND I,o: I HEARD A BUGLE, ETC ......................................................

SOME OF THOSE RRKJHT IMMORTAL SOI'LS ............................................ 2;>4

THE BEAUTIES oE THE DEMERIT SYSTEM.

THE DAILY ROUTINE

POME RECOLLECTIONS OF BEXXY'S

WEST POINT ............................................................................ 281

MY FI RS T HOP ........................................................................... 284

RECOLLECTIONS .......................................................................... 288

THE EXCISE NO//LE .................................................................... 301

RFVI i:\VINC THE CAMl'AK-N ............................................................ 30*3

OLLA PODRIDA ........................................ ................................. 309

LAST NK;HT IN BARRACKS ............................................................. 3-_>o

VOCABULAR V ... .......................................................... 337

Fron, ^Cadet Life at West Point."
the late General Strong

LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS.

2. CROW NEST. LOOKING; SOUTH

PACK 13

3. CADET MONUMENT

4 FORT PUTNAM

5. RUIXS OF FORT PUTNAM

6. WCM )I) 'S M< >N UMENT

7. VIEWS FR)M SIEGE BATTERY

8. GREAT CHAIN

9. C RO W N E S T

10. K< >SCI 1 S( V.Ki >\S MONUMENT

11. DADE-S MONUMENT ,

12. STEPS LEADING To KosciUSC/Ko'S GARDEN

13. THE THOMAS POWELL OFF STORM KING

14 THE NORTH BARRACKS

15. THE MESS HALL

1C THIRTEEN INCH MORTAR

IT. THE SOUTH BARRACKS

18. BENNY HAVENS

19. WEST POINT HOTKI

, 65

20. ROAD TO CO//ENS- DOCK

21. THE MILITARY ACADEMY HAND

22. THE RECEPTION OF A I'LEP.E

23. THE PLEBF/S TRIP FROM THE COMMISSARY

24. B A Yo X E T E X E RC I S E

25 HOBGOBLINS oX POST

26. SliUAD DKILI

J7. LEAVING CAMP

It STl'DYING IN BARRACKS

29. PLEBF.S FENCING

M. RECITATION IX "MATH."

31. SCENE IN THE Hop.RooM

NE IN THE RIDINGHALL.

33. GOING ox FURLOUGH

\E IN THE MKSSHALI

3/i. PoLICKING CAMP

36. THE LAST REVIEW...

12 LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS.

PAGE

37. GOING DOWN THE HUDSON 94

38. THE ENCAMPMENT 118

39. THE OLD ACADEMY 122

40. THE PARADE 130

41. VIEW FROM BATTERY ROCK 135

42. DREAM OF FURLOUGH 144

43. FOUR SCENES IN A CADET WALTZ 154

44. A CADET HASH 163

45. SCENE IN THE COMMANDANT'S OFFICE 168

46. HE IS CHALLENGED BY THE SUPT.'S "BUM." 173

47. THEY LAY YE PROSTRATE COURIER KINDLY ON A SHUTTER 174

48. AT THE GUARD-HOUSE DOOR 175

49. FRANK DAVENPORT AT HOME 175

50. IN STALKED THE MESSENGER OF WOE 176

51. THE BELL-BUTTON 179

52. THE LAST OF POOR FRANK 180

53. A CADET ON HORSEBACK 185

54. A DIABOLICAL SCENE 191

55. THE BILLY-GOAT 195

56. DADEGAN'S "HIVE" 198

57. HURDLE SCENE 200

58. VIEW FROM GARRISON'S 210

59. FORT PUTNAM 215

60. THE CHAPEL 225

61. COZZENS' 236

62. THE ACADEMIC BUILDING 238

63. OLD BENTZ THE BUGLER 253

64. BUTTERMILK FALLS 259

65. CHURCH OF THE HOLY INNOCENTS 281

66. MARTELAER'S ROCK 285

67. TROPHY GUNS 30f5

68. CADET'S MESS-HALL 310

69. THE LIBRARY 322

0? THE

'UKIVBRSIT1

WEST POINT.

As we passed the foot of Cro 7 Xest we caught pleasant
glimpses of West Point, and in a few moments the whole
outline of the promontory, and the grand ranges of hills

CROW NEST, LOOKING SOUTH.

around and beyond it, were in full view, We landed in
a sheltered cove, a little above Camp-town, the station of
United States troops, and climbed a very steep hill to the

14 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Cemetery upon its broad and level summit, more than a
hundred feet above the river.

It is a shaded, quiet, beautiful retreat, consecrated to
the repose of the dead, and during the summer season has
crowds of thoughtful visitors at all hours.

There, side by side, the dark green cedars cluster,
Like sentries watching by that camp of death;

There, like an army's tents, with snow-white lustre,
The grave-stones gleam beneath.

********

Few are the graves, for here no populous city
Feeds with its myriad lives the hungry Fate,

While homely funerals, led by grief and pity,
Crowd through the open gate.

Here sleep brave men, who, in the deadly quarrel,

Fought for their country, and their life-blood poured;

Above whose dust she carves the deathless laurel,
Wreathing the victor's sword.

.And here the young cadet, in manly beauty,

Borne from the tents which skirt those rocky banks,
Called from life's daily drills, and peerless duty,
To those unbroken ranks.

The most conspicuous object in the Cemetery is the
Cadets' Monument, situated in the eastern angle. It is a
short column of castle form, composed of light-brown
hewn stone, surmounted by military emblems, and a
foliated memorial urn, wrought from the same material.
It was erected in the autumn of 1818 to the memory of
Vincent M. Lowe, of Xew York, by his brother cadets.
He was accidentally killed by the discharge of a cannon
on the 1st of January, 1817.

'-BOOK.

ie names of several other officers and cadets are in-
scribed upon the monument, it having been adapted by
the members of the institution as " Sacred to the memory
of the deceased, whose names are here recorded.''

CADET MONUMENT.

From the brow of the hill, near the Cadets' Monument,
is a comprehensive view of the picturesque village of Cold
Spring, on the east side of the river, occupying a spacious
alluvial slope, bounded by rugged heights on the north,
and connected, behind a range of quite lofty mountains,
with the fertile valleys of Duchess and Putnam Counties.
Let us turn our eyes eastward, and from another point on
the margin of the Cemetery, where a lovely shaded walk
invites the strollers on warm afternoons, survey Camp-

1C WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

town at our feet, with West Point on the adjacent hills.
In this view we see the old landing place, the road up to
the plateau, the Laboratory buildings, the siege battery,
the hotel, and the remains of old Fort Clinton, upon the
highest ground of the plain ; the blue dome of the Library,
the turrets of the great mess-hall on the extreme right j
the cove, crossed by the Hudson River Railway, and the
range of hills on the eastern side of the river.

Following this walk to the entrance-gate, we traverse a
delightful winding road along the river bank, picturesque
at every turn, to the parting of the ways. One of these
leads to the Point, the other up to Mount Independence,
on whose summit repose the gray old ruins of Fort Put-
nam. We had ascended that winding mountain road
many times before, and listened to the echoes of the sweet
bugle, or the deeper voices of the morning and evening
gun at the Point ; now we were invited by a shady path,
and a desire of novelty, from the road between Forts
Webb and Putnam, into the deep, rocky gorge between
Mount Independence and the more lofty Redoubt Hill, to
the rear of the old fortress, where it wears the appearance
of a ruined castle upon a mountain crag.

The afternoon sun was falling full upon the mouldering
ruin and the chaotic mass of rocks beneath it, while the
clear blue sky, and white clouds, presented the whole
group, with accompanying evergreens, in the boldest relief.

Making our way back by another but more difficult
path, along the foot of the steep acclivity, we soon stood
upon the broken walls of Fort Putnam, five hundred feet
above the river, with a scene before us of unsurpassed

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

beauty and interest, viewed in the soft light of the evening
sun.

At our feet lay the promontory of West Point, with its
Military Academy, the quarters of the officers and the
cadets, and other buildings of the institution. To the L'ft
Constitution Island, from a point of which, where a
ted wall now stands, to the opposite shore of the river,

FORT PUTNAM.

massive iron chain was laid across floating timbers, by
he Americana, during the old war for independ.

yond the island, arose the smoke of the furnaces, the
and the roofs of Cold Springs. Towards the left
i up the -lofty Mount Taurus, vulgarly called "Bull
11," ut whose base, in the shadow of a towering wall of
ock, and in the midst of grand old trees, nestles " I'nder
Cliff, ' the home of Morris, the warbler, whose songs have
delighted thousands i;i both hemispheres. On the extreme
left arose old Cro' Xest. and over its right shoulder lay the

18 WEST POINT SCKAP-BCOK.

rugged range of Break Neck, dipping to the river suffi-
ciently to reveal the beautiful country beyond, on the bor-
ders of Newburgh bay.

This is one of the most attractive points of view on the
Hudson.

RUINS OF FORT PUTNAM.

Fort Putnam was erected by the Americans in 1778, for
the purpose of defending Fort Clinton on the plain below,
and to more thoroughly secure the river against the pas-
sage of hostile fleets. It was built under the direction of
Colonel Rufus Putnam, and chiefly by the men of his
Massachusetts regiment. It commanded the river above
and below the Point, and was almost impregnable, owing
to its position. In front, the mountain is quite steep for
many yards, and then slopes gently to the plain; while on
its western side a perpendicular wall of rock, fifty feet in
height, would have been presented to the enemy. Re-
doubts were also built upon other eminences in the vicin-
ity. These, being chiefly earthworks, have been almost

\VEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

)bliterated by the action of storms, and Fort Putnam was
)eedily disappearing under the hands of industrious
neighbors, who were carrying off the stone for building
purposes, when the work of demolition was arrested by
the Government. Its remains, consisting of only broken
walls, and two or three arched casemates, all overgrown
with vines and shrubbery, are now carefully preserved.

WOOD'S MONUMENT.

Kveu the cool spring that bubbles from the rocks in its

litre is kept clear of choking leaves, and we may reason-
ably hope that the ruins of Fort Putnam will remain an
object of interest to the passing traveller for more than a

jntury to come. The winding road from the fort to the
)lain is quite strep much of the way, but is so well

ought that carriages may safely traverse it, and the
tourist is led by it to one of the loveliest of river and

lountain views in the world. The road from the north

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

gate to the plain passes by the residences of the Professors ;
passing along this shaded walk, on the margin of a high
bank, a white marble obelisk is seen upon a grassy knoll
on the left, shooting up from a cluster of dark evergreen
trees. It was erected by Major- General Jacob Brown, of
the United States Army, in memory of his youthful and
well-beloved companion in arms, Lieutenant-Colonel E. D.
Wood, of the Corps of Engineers, who fell while leading a
charge at the sortie of Fort Erie, in Upper Canada, on the
17th of September, 1824. He had been a pupil of the
Military Academy at West Point. " He was/' says one of
the inscriptions, " exemplary as a Christian, and distin-
guished as a soldier.*' Passing a little further on, a grav-
elled walk diverges river- ward, and leads down to the
siege battery of six guns, erected by the cadets while in

VIEWS FROM SIEGE BATTERY.

the performance of their practical exercises in engineering.
The carmonwere housed, and no gunners were near, yet

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

the works appeared formidable. They were composed of
gabions covered with turf, soft and even as fine velvet.
The battery commands one of the most pleasing views from
the Point, comprising Constitution Island, Mount Taurus,
and Break Xeck on the right ; Cro 7 Nest and the Storm
King on the left ; and ten miles up the river, with Polop-
pel ? s Island, and the shores above Xewburgh, in the centre.
A similar view is obtained from the piazza of Roe's Hotel,
on the brow of the hill just above. A little westward of
tue siege battery, are the buildings of the Laboratory of
the institution, in which are deposited some interesting
relics of the old war for independence. One of the most

GREAT CHAIX.

ittractive groups among these relics is composed of sev-
al links of the great iron chain, already mentioned, that
anned the river, enclosing a large brass mortar taken
m the British at Stony Point by AVayne, and two

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

smaller ones that were among the spoils of victory at
Saratoga.

There are a dozen links of the chain, and two huge
clevises. The links are made of iron bars, two and a-half
inches square. Their average length is a little over two
feet, and their weight about fourteen pounds each. The
chain was stretched across the river at the narrowest
place, just above Gee's Point (the extreme rocky end of
West Point), and Constitution Island.

It was laid across a boom of heavy logs that floated
near together. They were sixteen feet long, and pointed
at each end, so as to offer little resistance to the tidal cur-
rents. The chain was fastened to these logs by staples,
and at each shore by huge blocks of wood and stone. This
chain and boom afforded an efficient barrier to the passage
of vessels ; bat their strength was never tested, as the keel
of an enemy's ship never ploughed the Hudson after the
fleet of Yaughan passed up and down in the autumn of
1777, and performed its destructive mission.

The views from Roe's Hotel, on the extreme northern
verge of the summit of the plain of West Point, are very
pleasing in almost every direction. The one northward,
similar to that from the siege battery, is the finest ; west-
ward, the eye takes in the Laboratory, Colonel Wood's
monument, a part of the shaded walk along the northern
margin of the plain, and Mount Independence, crowned
with the ruins of Fort Putnam. Southward, the view
comprehends the entire parade, and glimpses of the
Academy through the trees, the Chapel, Library, Mess-
hall, and Barracks, with some of the officers' and Professors'

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

residences on the extreme right. The earthworks of Fort
Clinton have recently been restored in the original form
and general proportions, exactly upon their ancient site,
and present, with the beautiful trees growing within their

green banks, a very pleasant object from any point of
view. The old fort was constructed in the sp:ing of 1778,
under the direction of the brave Polish soldier Thaddeus
Kosciusczko, who was then a Colonel in the Continental

nny and Chief of the Engineer Corps. The fort, when
completed, was six hundred yards around within the walls.
The embankments were twenty-one feet at the base and
fourteen feet in height.

Hit rrarks and huts sufficient to accommodate six hun-

ivd persons were erected within the fort. It stood upon

clill'on the margin of the plain, one hundred and eighty
eet above the river. Passing along the verge of the clilV,

ulhwurd from Kosciusczko's monument, erected by the

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Corps of Cadets in 1828, at a cost of five thousand dollars,
the visitor soon reaches another memorial stone. It is of
white marble, the chief portion being a fluted column,
entwined by a laurel wreath, held in the beak of an eagle
perched upon its top.

KOSCIUSCZKO'S MONUMENT.

The pedestal is of temple form, square, with a row of
encircling stars upon its entablature, and a cannon like
supporting column at each corner. It was erected to
commemorate a battle fought between a detachment of
United States troops, under Major Francis L. Dade, and
a party of Seminole Indians, in the everglades of Florida,
on the 28th of December, 1835.

iT POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The detachment consisted of one hundred and eight
men, all of whom, save three, were massacred by the sav-
ages on that occasion. The troops nobly defended them-
selves, and made no attempt to retreat.

Their remains repose near St. Augustine, in Florida.
This monument was erected by the three regiments, and
the Medical Staff, from which the detachment was selected.

DADE'S MONUMENT.

few feet from "Dade's Command" monument, a narrow
lli through a rocky passage, overhung with boughs and
shrubbery, leads down to a pleasant terrace in the steep
Lank of the river, which is called " Kosciusczko's Garden."
At the back of the terrace the rock rises perpendicularly
to the plain. This is said to have been Kosciusczko's

orite place of resort for reading and meditation while
was at \\Yst Point. He found a living spring bubbling
m the rocks in the middle of the terrace, and there he

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

constructed a pretty little fountain. Its ruins were dis-
covered in 1802, and repaired. The water now rises into
a marble basin ; seats have been provided for visitors ;
ornamental shrubs have been planted, and the whole place
wears an aspect of mingled romance and beauty. A deep
circular indentation in the rock, back of the fountain, was
made, tradition affirms, by a cannon-ball sent from a

STEPS LEADING TO KOSCIUSCZKO'S GARDEN.

British ship, while the Polish soldier was occupying his
accustomed loitering place, reading Yauban and regaled
by the perfumes of roses.

From this quiet, solitary retreat a pathway, appropri-
ately called " Flirtation Walk," leads up to the plain. A

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 27

hort distance from Kosciusczko's Garden, upon a higher
terrace, is Battery Knox, constructed by the cadets. It
commands a fine view of the eastern shore of the Hudson,
in the Highlands, and down the river to " Anthony's
Nose."

\-;ir by are seen the Cavalry Stables, and the Riding
Hall, belonging to the Military Academy, and below
there's seen the new landing. A little higher up on the
plain are the groups of spacious edifices used for the pur-
poses of the institution.

The road from the plain to the landing was cut from the
steep rocky banks of the river at a heavy expense to the
Government.

The wharf is spacious, and there a sentinel is continu-
rlly posted, with a slate and pencil to record the names of
all persons who arrive and depart. This is for the use of
the Superintendent, by which means he is informed daily
of the arrival of any persons to whom he might wish to
extend personal or professional courtesies.

West Point was indicated by Washington as early as
1783, as an eligible place for a Military Academy. In his
message to Congress in 1793, he recommended the estab-
lishment of one at AVest Point. The subject rested until

02, when Congress made provision by law for such an
stitution there. Very little progress was made in the
natter until 181-, when, by another Act of Congress, a
orps of Mutineers and Professors was organi/ed, and the

hool endowed with the most attractive features of a
terary institution, mingled with that of a military char-
ter. From that time to the present the Academy has

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

been increasing in importance as the nursery of efficient
Army officers and skilful practical engineers.

" The moon looks down on Old Cro' Nest,
She mellows the shade on his shaggy breast,
And seems his huge grey form to throw
In a silver cone on the wave below ;
His sides are broken by spots of shade,
By the walnut bough and the cedar made,
And thro' their clustering branches dark
Glimmers and dies the fire-fly's spark
Like starry twinkles that momently break
Through the rifts of the gathering tempest's rack."
" The Culprit Fay."

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

REMINISCENCES OF OLDEN TIMES.

THE ATTEMPT TO BOMBARD THE SUPERINTENDENT'S

HOUSE.

Under the flag-staff on the plain, during the whole time
I was at the Point, were two guns laid upon trestles, one
a 12-pounder and the other a 24-pounder.

The tradition accounting for the fact that they were
thus dismounted, ran as follows : Sometime previous to
1823, these guns were mounted on their carriages. Early
one morning the 24-pounder was discovered directly
opposite the door of the Superintendent's house, close to
the road, and pointed at the window just over the door.
Upon examination, the gun was found to be loaded with
a full cartridge, and double shotted, with a thick wad.
In the vent was found a long fuze, or slow match of the
kind then used to fire large guns. The fuze had been
lighted, and had burned nearly up to the vent, but the
previous night had been very stormy, and the wind and
rain had evidently extinguished the match. Had the gun
exploded, the front wall of the house would have been

itered down, and loss of life would have taken place.
In consequence of this murderous attempt, the guns were
afterwards dismounted.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

THE ATTEMPT TO BLOW UP THE OLD NOETH
BARRACKS.

The old North Barracks faced nearly east and west.
It was four stories high, the upper one of which went by
the name of "the cock-loft.' 7 Through each of the stories
ran an entry or hall the entire length of the building.
At each end of the lower hall was a door, only the south-
ern one of which was ever used, the north door being

THE NORTH BARRACKS.

kept closed. There was also a staircase at each end of
the hall, reaching to the cockloft. The north staircase
was very seldom used, though it was entirely unobstructed.
The lower story was used on each side of the hall exclu-
sively for section rooms, and the upper stories for cadets 7
rooms. It was very seldom that any person went up or
down the north staircase. A cadet now alive who
graduated in 1824, told me that, for no reason he could
think of, he once went down the north staircase late in
the evening, and as he reached the lower landing he saw

WKST TOIXT SCRAP-BOOK.

a flickering light, and heard a queer sputtering noise, like
tluit made by a half extinguished and wet candle.
Curiosity led him to investigate the cause. He saw, not
knowing what it was. a dark ball in the corner, from the
top of which proceeded the light. Without exactly
knowing what he did, he seized hold of that which was
burning, and easily took it from the ball, which he then
saw was a bomb-shell, and the burning substance a shell
fuze, which, being too small for the fuze-hole of the shell,
he easily drew out. The shell was found charged with
powder, and if accident, or rather Providence, had not
led him, contrary to his usual custom, to go down the
north staircase, or if, even then, he had been aware of his
clanger, the bomb-shell would have exploded, and pos-
sibly the side of the barrack blown out.

ESPIONAGE OVER THE CADETS.

There was a prevalent belief in my day that the Super-
intendent employed spies to report the misdeeds of
cadets ; certain it is that he knew many things done in
supposed secrecy, his knowledge of which was very un-
accountable. Many instances of this extraordinary knowl-
edge used to be related. The spies were supposed to be,
: niongst others, the postmaster and the fellows whose
wives were washerwomen, and one named " Lipsy " was
peculiarly obnoxious on this account. One instance of
this knowledge occurred to myself. In those days there
was no fatigue uniform a hat with the rim cut off,

32 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

except in front to represent a visor, and covered with an
oil-skin, did duty as a military cap. Any cadet who could
get one, wore in winter a fur cap. One was sent to me in
January, when the river was full of floating ice, and I
was notified that the cap was at Cold Spring waiting for
me to get it. I applied to the Superintendent for per-
mission to go to Cold Spring one Saturday afternoon, and
to draw a dollar from my pay for expenses, telling the
Superintendent the reason. This permission he gave.
Upon endeavoring to procure a conveyance across the
river, the boatmen all said they would carry me over for
nothing, but would charge five dollars to bring me back.
Though I had only one dollar in my pocket, boy-like, I
accepted the offer, and went over. I procured my fur
cap, but on attempting to re-cross, found that even five
dollars promised would induce no one to row me back, so
I had to stay all night. Early the next morning, the
river having frozen solid during the night, I walked back
on the ice in time for reveille. Nothing was said to me
about this adventure until the next time I had occasion to
call at the Superintendent's office. After transacting what
business I had, the Superintendent said to me : "You did
not return to the Point the day you went to Cold Spring,
as you promised, but you were excused because you
made all the effort you could to return ; you relied on the
promise of the boatman to bring you back/' He told me
all that I had done, how cold I was when I arrived, how I
refused to drink the liquor which I was offered, how hard
a walk it was across the river ; and, in short, all the cir-
cumstances as if he had been with me and he wound up

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 33

by saying that it was unjustifiably foolhardy to have gone
at nil. * * * * * * * * *

I once received a ten dollar bill through the post-office.
In less than a week my father wrote me word that he had
received a copy of the printed rules of the Academy, with
particular reference to the one forbidding money to be
sent to cadets. After graduating I found that the refer-
ence was in the Superintendent's handwriting *

While in the first class, I obtained permission to ride
over the mountains on horseback to !N"ewburgh. On reach-
ing the town my companion and myself were much
fatigued and so were the animals.

We went to the hotel and had our horses cared for. I
would not go into the building, but walked on the piazza ;
n iy companion, however, went in and refreshed himself
with what he could find. We returned quite late at night.
The next day my companion was placed in arrest, but I
was let off. The next time I went to the Superintendent's
ollice he told me that I had done well not to enter the
h<;tel at Xcwlmrgh, but to walk on the piazza.

It was impossible to discover who was the informant.
The cause of the arrest was alleged to be ''absence from
the post after tattoo ;" but as both were equally culpable
in this respect, and neither blameworthy, the cause was
(undoubtedly, ,^<>iiiLC into the hotel.

After a week's arrest the other was released, but he ha 1
ridden a very hard horse and was terribly chafed, and the
anvst. by relieving him of military duty, saved him from
the doctor.

There was no hospital in those days.

34 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

MESS-HALL KEMINISCENCES.

Tho fare of the cadets in those days was much grumbled
at, but I think never without reason.

It consisted almost exclusively of beef, boiled, roasted,
or baked for dinner ; cold, sliced, or smoked for breakfast
and supper ; beef soup twice a week, and bread pudding
with molasses on soup days.

The bread was excellent, and huge batches were baked
twice a week and stowed away in a great room.

THE MESS HALT*

The stale bread and the remnants it was believed were
made into puddings. Once the Captain of the Mess-hall
found in a pudding a nest of three or four mice. He
forthwith carried the great tin pan which contained the
pudding to the Superintendent, who dismissed him with
the information that it was an accident which might easily
happen. But immediately after that, for at least a month,
the corps were served with roast geese and turkej^s in
great abundance.

The story was that this fare was forced upon the stew-
ard as a punishment for the mice. It was more probably

WKST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 35

a free-will offering from Mr. Cozzens, who was always a
great friend to the cadets, and a universal favorite.
While carver of my squad I once found that the tea came
out of the great tea-pot less fluently than usual, and upon
seeking the cause, discovered a dish-cloth in the bottom
of the spout. Another time a carver fished out a fine-
tooth comb from the pudding, and this brought another
supply of geese and turkeys.

The only man I ever saw eat pork and molasses was a
Southerner. He would cut a slice of fat pork and cover it
with molasses and esteem it the greatest luxury of the
table. Yet it was always a standing jibe on the " Yankees 77
that they were "pork and molasses eaters. 77

Previous to 1820, the cadets on the fourth of July
were allowed liquors, and they always had a sumptuous
dinner. This was prohibited by the Superintendent in
MI the fourth of July of that year, Major - ,
the Commandant, spread a table in his own house and
invited the whole corps to partake ; wines, ices, and rich
provisions in abundance. The story circulated afterwards
that he and the Superintendent quarrelled in consequence
of the dinner, and it never was repeated.

OUR OLD COMMANDANT.

was always a source of joy when Major W

drilled the battalion ; his fine presence, military bearing,
and enthusiasm, ami his sonorous and musical voice, in-
fus.'d such spirit into the corps, that two hours' drill

36 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

under him was less fatiguing than an hour's drill under
any of the Instructors of Infantry, especially under Lieu-
tenant H , who would sometimes spend the whole

time in executing two manoeuvres. Of these, I remember
11 Close column on first company, right in front;" and then
"Into line faced to the rear/' following each other in
endless succession. The Major sometimes drilled the
battalion, mounted on an old charger that he had used
in the war a long-tailed sorrel said to have been
wounded when he was at the sortie of Fort Erie. On
such occasions our only regretf was that he finished the
drill too soon.

He was a great martinet, and, strange to say, he was
no favorite with the corps, who gave him the sobriquet
of " Old Haughty," but his haughtiness was only military
bearing. He was accessible always, and* kindly consider-
ate of every cadet's feelings.

I once carried him a "permit" written thus : "Cadet
has permission to be absent from 1 p. M. untiH even-
ing parade.' 1 He signed it, with this remark u One ' I'
sir ; one * I' to until ; two ' I's ' to till. Never bring me
a permit written so again. Remember, sir, spell until
with one ' 1.' I have had occasion to correct many such
errors."

Late one night he returned to West Point from New
York, having been absent several days. He always slept
in camp in a marquee, close to the river front, his house
being dismantled during the encampment. Of course he
did not know the countersign. Attempting to pass the
sentinel, he was immediately challenged " Who goes

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 37

there ?" " Commandant of the Post." " Advance, Com-
mandant of the Post, and give the countersign." The
Major advanced, threw open his cloak, and said: "I have
been absent several days, do not know the countersign ;

you recognize me, of course Major AV ," and he

attempted to pass. The sentinel flew at him, ordered
him to halt, upon penalty of being bayoneted, and called
for the Corporal of the Guard. There the Major had to
stand, in a drenching rain, until the Corporal of the
Guard came and released him. The next day the sentinel
who halted the Major was sent for, and instead of the
i\ primand he expected, was highly complimented for his
firmness and decision. * *

After the death of Adams and Jefferson, on the 4th of
July, 1826, I was Sergeant of the Guard, and, as such,
charged with the firing of a gun every fifteen minutes
one for each patriot. I was ordered to be very exact in
tl e time, so that the intervals might be precisely fifteen
minutes. The firing commenced at Reveille and was to
se at Retreat. Shortly after morning parade I was sent
for in great haste by the Commandant, to know why I
disobeyed the order as to time. I denied disobeying the
order, and insisted that the guns were discharged at the
proper intervals. To avoid any further trouble, I loaded
and touched them off myself, watch in hand. Again I
was sent for, and rated soundly for failure. "What it all
meant I could not understand, but the Major went with
me to the guard-tent, and just as I touched off the gun,
before its echoes died away, another report was heard.
The Major then saw that I was not at fault. The cause

38 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

was the blasting of rocks just under Fort Putnam, which
he had heard 7 but which I had not noted. Thereupon he
had the blasting discontinued, and apologized before the
whole guard for his unjust censure.

HS*********

Smoking was strictly prohibited after the first of Janu-
ary, 1824. I always disregarded the prohibition, and
suffered in consequence. The Major, however, would
never notice it unless compelled to do so. One morning,
after handing in my report as Officer of the Day, and
being about to retire, he beckoned me to approach him
again, and said, "The next time you come to ine officially,
change your coat, it is reeking with tobacco smoke !"

That time I escaped, but upon another occasion the
Chief Engineer went through the barracks upon a tour of
inspection, accompanied by the Major. My room was, as
usual, redolent with tobacco smoke, and on the next
Friday I heard read on parade, three reports one for
smoking, one for allowing smoking in my room, being
Orderly, and one for not keeping my room in good order.
The first two, for positive and wilful disobedience of
orders ; and the last for gross neglect of duty. * * *

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

THE BURIAL OF A CADET.

I stood beside him when the sun

"Was sinking in the west,
Pouring his fading beams upon

Banner and glittering crest.
Save from his cheek, no passer by

His boyhood could discern,
For martial fire was in his eye

His brow like manhood stern.

I stood beside him, and I drew

A veil of gauze away.
His eyes were glazed ; cold, clammy dew

"Upon his forehead lay.
Around his form I saw them twine

A shroud with many a fold ;
I touched his lifeless hand to mine,

'Twas cold 'twas icy cold.

I stood beside him, and helped bear

His body to the tomb ;
"Waving around the train, I saw

Banner and sable plume.
Onward they moved with voices dumb,

To music, sad and drear ;
vily rolled the muffled drum,

Heavily creaked the bier.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

I stood beside him, as they lowered

His coffin in the ground ;
I heard the grating of the cord,

The falling clods resound.
I saw his comrades near him stand,

The parting looks they gave ;
I heard the voice of low command,

The volley o'er the grave.

I stood above him as the sun.

Was sinking in the west,
I saw a stone engraved upon,

To mark his place of rest.
I saw the long grass waving high,

I heard the wind's deep moan.
A voice seemed whispering in a sigh,

" He sleeps he sleeps alone 1 "

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

DISAPPOINTMENT AND REFORM;

OB,

THE TRICKS OF AN OLD SOLDIER.

DRAMATIS PERSONS

A COLONEL.
A SURGEON.

AN ASSISTANT SURGEON.
HOSPITAL STEWARD.
CADET COBPOBAL TBIM.
" " CASEY.

CADET PRIVATE BOB. CARELESS.

BEN. GBOUKE.
" JOE DONE.
" " DAN. SHANNON.

" " HUGH MALCOLM.

ACT FIRST. SCENE IST.

(A room in the South Barracks ; two mattresses on the floor, on which are two
cadets sleeping. Time morning. Reveille is heard without.)

[BoB. CARELESS awakes and rubs his eyes.]
BOB. " Damn reveille*. " (Calls aloud. ) "Ben. Grouse, you sleepy head, wake

np."

[BEN. awakes with a start]

BEN. "Has reveille beat yet?"

BOB. "Yes, 'tis beating off; don't you hear it?''

[BEN. gets out of bed, and hurries on his clothes.]
BEN. "I shall be late/ 1

42 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

BOB. " So shall I; so I won't go. Why the devil don't they beat reveille' longer?"
(Yawns.)

BEN. "You had better get up, Bob., and 'bone' your Math., we've got those
three problems for review to-day." (Exit BEN. )

BOB. " Well, if the lesson is hard, I haven't time to learn it ; and if it is easy,
I'll get it after breakfast. At any rate, I can go to the Hospital and get excused ;
so I'll finish my nap." (Turns over, and goes to sleep.)

SCENE 2o.

(Dispensary in the Hospital. Phials on shelves around the room. On one side a
table and book. A bench in the back ground. )

[Enter HOSPITAL STEWARD.]

STEWARD. " Well, what shall I prepare for to-day? Soda and camphor powders,
and camphor and soda powders, for everything. Sore toe, sprained ankle, costive-
ness, headache, and nothing at all. The universal cure and prescription. Soda
and camphor powders ; salts and rhubarb. The Doctor didn't give rhubarb as
usual yesterday; so I guess he will give it to-day. How much is there? Plenty."

[Enter DOCTOR.]

DOCTOR. " Steward, did you give those soda and camphor powders to the cadet
upstairs ?"

STEWARD. "Yes, sir."
DOCTOR. " How did they operate?"
STEWARD. "I don't know, sir ; pretty well, I believe."

DOCTOR. "Humph ! He'll get well by and by. I believe I'll go and see him."
(Exit DOCTOR.)

[Enter Cadet Corporal TRIM, and two other Cadets, one of

whom is BOB. CARELESS.]
BOB. " Steward, have you any chalk?"
TRIM. " What do you want of chalk, Bob.?"

BOB. " Oh, nothing : carbonate of lime is said to be very good in the morning."
(Eats a piece. )

TRIM. (Smiling). " What is the matter with you, Bob ?"

BOB. "Why, I'll be hanged if I know. What would you tell him? If I say I
have cut my finger, I get a dose of salts ! If my head aches, then blue pills or
calomel powders !"

TRIM. "Tell him you feel a general debility."

[Enter another squad of Cadets, looking sorrowful, and making

wry faces. Not seeing the Doctor, they brighten up.]
CORPORAL CASEY. " Trim, hasn't ' Old Walter' or ' Gil Bias' come yet ?"
TRIM. " No, and I'll go if he don't come soon. It's a hard case that we have to
come here every morning, Casey !"

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 43

; Aye, Trim ; but every dog h.is his day."
JOE DONE. " You here again, Bob. ; what in the deuce is the matter with you?"
BOB. "Those three problems, Joe, made me sick. General debility, Joe!
liveness, Joe! Dose of salts, Joe! Better than zero. Old Tom would eer-
ily have me up to-day. What is the case with you to-day ?"
JOE DONE. " I sprained my ankle going down to Benny's last night, with Dan
mnon. "

D\N. "Yes, and you would have left me in the lurch, if you had tumbled off,
1 did not know where I was." ,

[Re-enter DOCTOR.]

(A general yawning ; faces are lengthened three inches.)

(Bob. tries to look pale ; Joe Done hobbles to a seat ; Dan ties a handkerchief
>und his head ; hoarse coughing and some sneezing, during which the Doctor
:s his seat.)

DOCTOR. "Steward, hem ! you may give the patient upstairs a dose of calomel,
he seems to be a little feverish ; then a little rhubarb, he is a little costive ; and
you must not give him anything to eat to-day but grueL Who comes first?'*
TI:IM. " The sick -book of the 2d Company."

DOCTOR. "Cadet Malcolm." (The first Cadet steps forward.) Well, Mr. Mal-
colm, what is the matter with you to-day ?"

MAiyCOLM. ' ' I don't know, Doctor. I feel very sick at my stomach, and I have
a swimming in my head when I get up from my chair."

DOCTOR. "Sick at your stomach, hey ? vertigo well, well, knock about, -
take exercise stir yourself, nothing better except a dose of salts ! Next."

[JoE DONE steps up. ]
DOCTOR. " How do you do to-d.iy V"

JOE DOSE. (Coughs) " Why, I have sprained my ankle, and my cold has not
gorjo yet (coughs); those pills did not operate yesterday." (Coughs again.)

DOCTOR. "Didn't operate, that's strange; let me feel of your pulse pretty
qui.-k; your tongue (cadet shows his tongue) yes, well, take three powders
to-morrow, and some salts to-day. I'll excuse you from duty."

JOE DONE. (Coughs) "Yes, sir;" (aside "but your powders will go where
the others went")

MAI.O.I.M. "Doctor, I don't care about being excused from parade, I think I
can attend to .''

DOCTOR. " Can't excuse you from anything to-day, Mr. Malcolm. Knock about !

k about ! and you'll gt-t well."

MALCOLM. " But Doctor, I've taken a dose of salts !"
DOCTOR. "Well, tlu-y will do you good."

(Malcolm retires, saying aside "that's a hard case, I swear.")
DOCTOR. "Next! Mr. Careless."

44 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

BOB CABELESS. "Oh ! Ah !'' (sighs bitterly and looks pale. ;

DOCTOB. "Well, Mr. Careless, what is the matter with you to-day?''

BOB. " Why, sir, I was sunstruck yesterday, and I feel a general debility ; my
head aches ; I'm costive, and I'm ."

DOCTOB. " Let's feel of your pulse yes ! well ! hem ! did you go to breakfast
this morning?"

BOB. " No ! Yes, sir ! I went there."

DOCTOR. ' ' How much did you eat ? Anything ?"

BOB. "Why, yes, sir, I ate three very small pieces of toast, a little meat, and
some coffee."

DOCTOE. " Good appetite, Mr. Careless (enter Assistant-Surgeon) very good
appetite, pulse pretty regular ; let me see your tongue." (Bob shows his tongue.)
Good Heavens ! fever ! high fever ! sunstruck ! this warm weather apt to produce
fever ! You say you have a good appetite ?"

BOB. "No, sir ; you said so ; my appetite is not very good, oh !"

DOCTOB. "Yes, sure sign of fever. DOCTOE (to Assistant-Surgeon) Cadet
Careless was sunstruck yesterday, which has put him in a high fever a new case
very difficult."

AssisTAKT-SuEGEON. " Yes, sir, coup de soleil ah, I've heard of dangerous
results from similar attacks. Ahem ! There was a^soldier once who ."

DOCTOR. ' ' Steward, give Mr. Careless some soda and camphor powders. Mr.
Careless, keep in the house to-day, and take care of yourself. I'll send you over
something."

BOB. (Retiring, says aside, " So much for chalk, but damn the powders.")

DOCTOB. "Cadet Shannon."

DAN. "Doctor, I've a bad headache, I did not sleep any last night, and I am
not at all able to do anything to-day."

DOCTOE. "Yes, yes ; give Mr. Shannon a dose of rhubarb."

(Steward grins ; Dan makes a wry face, and says to the Steward in an under-
tone, "Dam'me, old fellow, make it molasses." Steward to Dan "I can't, sir;
we have none." Dan takes the rhubarb, and remarks aside "It's the last time
you eaten me here.' ) [Exit all.]

ACT SECOND. SCENE IST.

(Superintendent s Quarters. )

(Enter SUPEEINTENDENT) " I must endeavour to prevent so. many applications
for the future, they are too absurd. O, ho ! he shall suffer for it ! I'll not submit

to it."

[Enter DOCTOB. ]

SUPEBINTENDENT. " Good morning, Doctor."

DOCTOR. " Colonel, good morning ; here is the morning sick report, sir. Cadet

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 45

Bhrmnon was absent from quarters last night I'm sure of it, sir, and have
reported him accordingly. "

SUPERINTENDENT. "That is not strange. I have heard of it before this morn-
ing ; but I have some private business with you ; but let's breakfast first."

DOCTOR. " Thank you, Colonel ; but I can't this morning. Good morning.
[Exit COLONEL and the DOCTOR.]

SCENE 2o.
(Guard room enter DAN SHANNON, who looks at the Sick Report.)

DAN. "Well, now, if that infernal Surgeon hasn't left me off the Sick Report.
What's this !' Absent from reveille' and from Academy.' I took a dose of that

confounded rhubarb. I've made a fool of myself. I'll be hanged if I ever ."

(Enter BOB CABKLESS.)

BOB (laughing.) "What the devil is the row, Dan? You look as if you had
beon drawn through a knot-hole."

DAN. ' ' Well, I ve a reason to look so ; that confounded Doctor hasn't put me on
the Sick Report, and I took a dose of that cursed rhubarb for nothing."

BOB. " Well, Dan, I'll tell you a secret ; never tell him that you have a head-
ache, or anything else that he can give you physic for, and be sure to chalk your
tongue well. '*

DAN. "No, may I be shot if you ever catch me playing the ' old soldier' again.
But I'll see the old codger."

(Exit in a rage.)

FINIS.

MAJOR BOB G .

AJB, " Widow Machree."

Now, my dear Commandant, 'tis no wonder you frown,

Och ! hone I Major Bob G. !
Popularity for you is fast going down,

Och ! hone ! Major Bob G. I
How altered we are in these dress hats we wear,
And you've cut off our hair which should be flowing free,
There's no longer a churl who can boast of a curl,
Och ! hone ! Major Bob G. I

46 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Oh ! my dear Commandant, you've reported us so,

Och! hone ! Major Bob G. !
How to prevent being " found " we really don't know,

Och ! hone ! Major Bob G. !
To offer an excuse is no manner of use,
If there's a word of abuse 'tis the first thing you see,
And unless "milk and water " 'tis all quite improper,
Och ! hone ! Major Bob G. !

Now, my dear Commandant, without telling a lie,

Och ! hone ! Major Bob G. !
I don't think it exactly is proper to spy,

Och ! hone ! Major Bob G. !
We are really afraid, when we go to parade,
As you stand in the shade, or behind some big tree,
That you'll " pink " half the corps, or perhaps a few more,
Och ! hone ! Major Bob G. !

Some words of advice, my dear Major Bob G.,

Och ! hone ! Major Bob G. !
From somebody else, indirectly through me,

Och ! hone ! Major Bob G. !
Let us be as before you came into the corps,
And don't drill us from four until time for tea,
don't watch like a ferret to give us demerit,

Och ! hone ! Major Bob G.

FURLOUGH SONG OF 1829.

Lady no cap is oij my head,

No visor o'er my brow,
I've lost my plume, and lost my heart,

I'm not a soldier now.'

'EST POINT SCRAP-B(

My uniform I've taken off,

My " cits " I've just put on,

And silk I've substituted for

The leather stock I've worn.

No more the sound of cannon grates

"Upon my ear, as when

It waked me up at break of day,

I was a soldier then.

But now without the reveille,

I've learned to ope' mine eyes,

And also can get up from tea,

Without the word to "rise."

I'm not at " rest " when I should talk,

Don't flourish when I bow,

Nor do I march when I should walk,

I'm not a soldier now.

I've changed to glancing at a dress,

My " dressing at a glance,"

And 'form the " prompt manoeuvres " when

Advancing up the dance.

Lady no cap is on my head,

No visor o'er my brow,

I've lost my plume, and lost my heart,

I'm not a soldier now.

I've torn my " differential " up,

The leaves Lord ! how they flew I

And " integrals," and algebra,

Are out the window too.

The only " curvatures " I find,

Are of a neck or brow.

I've made my arms my " asymptotes,' 1

My lips my " tangents " now.

48 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

And if of wine I wish to know

How much is in a cup,

I place it even to my mouth,

And " integrate " it up.

The only " spirals " that I form,

Are twined about one; how

Would " Archimedes " or " Sinon " look,

If they could see me now !

I've changed my " co-sines " all to " verse,"

So did the muse require.

To boots, my " logarithms " as

They raise me somewhat higher.

My "sextant" and " theodolite "

Are on the mountain's brow,

And they may get themselves its " height,"

I cannot take it now.

For all my " measures " now I tread,
I " sight " through ladies' eyes.
My " observations " are remarks,
'Mid fish my " angling " lies.
And I can move without command,
Can sit up after ten,
Oh ! how unlike my former days,
I was a soldier then !

THE FOUK O'CLOCKS.

'Tis four o'clock, the bugle blows,
And whether now it rains or snows,
Or fierce winds whistle all about,
Be sure the girls will all be out.
What is the strange mysterious power,
That thus attends this mystic hour ?

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK:.

Why does it cause the lasses all
(No matter whether great or small)
To pace the side-walk to and. fro ?
Is it that each one wants a beau ?
And eager for some dear cadet,
Defies the snow, the wind, the wet ?
It must be so, for ere that note
H:is on the echoes ceased to float,
They come in haste, a motley crew,
In pink, in red, in black, and blue,
And joining each a gallant "grey,"
Soon while a pleasant hour away.
Each day they come, unfailing come,
And stay until the signal-drum,
"Which all their fondest wishes mocks,
And scatters all the " four o'clocks."

FANNY ELLSLER'S PIROUETTE BY MOONLIGHT.

Among the flying birds of passage which a few sum-
mers since sojourned for a brief period at West Point,
vv;r< the celebrated " danseuse " Mademoiselle Fanny
Ellsler, accompanied by her male assistant, Monsieur
Sylvester.

Whether the temperature of August was unfavorable
to the continuation of the vaulting exercise, or whether,
in a spirit of benevolence, she thought proper to conceal
under a long skirt those " caoutchouc" extremities which
had turned the heads of the citizens of Baltimore, so it
, that for two days Ma'm'selle ravished with her pres-
ence the young hearts of the Corps of Cadets. Never
e they more neatly apparelled, never performed they

50 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

their military duties in a more soldierly manner, than
when conscious that the blue eyes of the " Maitresse du
Ballet were observing their motions. Even the celebrated
Ned Kendall, the leader of the band, was inspired by her
presence. Waltzes and mazurkas, especially those which
the charming "figurante '* honored in her dances, super-
seded the usual inspiring marches by which the battalion
was wont to muster, and as that war-accoutred body per-
formed its evolutions, you would have irresistibly fancied
that, instead of representing the combinations of a mimic
battle, it was endeavoring to perform the figures of some
gigantic dance, in which all the privates were "Sons of
Mars/' and the officers sworded prompters. In the earlier
and more sultry part of the afternoon, when the cadets
were free to don their fatigue jackets, roll down their bed-
ding, and nap it under the shelter of their tents, they
might have been heard kicking the wooden floors of their
11 linen arbors'* in the delirium of " double shuffle/' and the
ecstasy of the " pigeon-wing/' their tarantula recreations
barely permitting to be recognized the lively solos of ac-
companying flutes. After supper a universal " stag-dance''
of not less than fifty couples came off. This is a peculiar
kind of affair, in which the dancers arrange themselves in
two long lines, facing each other, inside of a lane of candles,
half buried in the ground, and above these, three muskets
forming a tripod, and each bayonet having a candle splut-
tering on its point.

Drums, fifes, and violins formed the orchestra. The
cadets started with a simultaneous bound, involving them-
selves inextricably, and it at last became <a mere competi-

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 51

tion who should work his legs and feet most excruciatingly.
The citizen spectators looked on with prodigious appro-
bation, but none on the present occasion with more
satisfaction than Ma'm'selle Fanny, for whose especial
entertainment the dance had been gotten up.

It was after the ''stag' 7 was over, and "taps" had
sounded (at 10 P. M., after which no one is permitted to
cross the sentinels' posts without the countersign), that
Ciidct Pierre Dubois found himself stationed on one of the
remote posts known as " No. 4," where the fortunate
sentinel is secure to walk or not to walk, to sit or stand,
or even to sleep, without much danger of being reported ;
but in case he is caught, he would incur either the severe
penalty of dismissal, or, what seems worse at the time, at
least twenty "extras."

Running along the side of this post, and about twenty
feet from it, is a gravelled walk, where visitors may prome-
nade whenever they choose, generally without molestation
or reproof. This walk is a favorite resort, both durino*
tli ' day and until a late hour at night, thus giving to the
lo inly sentinel a glimpse of many a fair damsel and
enamored youth, in their moonlight rambles. It is
regarded as one of the advantages of that station, the
remaining live posts being monotonous enough, Heaven
knows! unk-ss we can conceive ideas novel and interest-
ing to oursi'l

Dubois. and those on guard with him, had been pre-
vented during the day from approaching near enough
to the fair " danseuse," to feast their eyes, as they
would have done. Imagine, then, with what pleasure

52 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Pierre saw her and Mons. Sylvester coming down the
gravelled walk towards him. He stopped walking and
gazed at the sprightly pair with tense optics, until they
stood opposite, when his mischievous geniu.3 suggested a
plot as original as it was pleasant.

" Who comes there ?" thundered he sternly. The twain
started slightly, surprised by the suddenness of the chal-
lenge, but, not dreaming that they were the persons ad-
dressed, they resumed their stroll. "Who comes there? 77
was again thundered in their ears, while the musket was
brought to a " charge" with such force that it sounded to
them as if a whole regiment were going through the man-
nual. They halted ; " Monsieur, you speak to us?" faltered
M. Sylvester. " Yes ! stop talking to the sentinel ! ad-
vance and give the countersign !" responded Dubois in a
terrible voice. M. Sylvester was so much frightened that
he took to his heels and ran as fast as he could to the
hotel, leaving the lady trembling, and strange to say of
one generally so active, incapable of moving a step.
''Advance and give the countersign! 77 replied Dubois, still
maintaining his threatening attitude, and betraying by the
ardor of his looks his admiration of the little form before
him, now tremulous as the aspen leaf. " De countersign/ 7
said Fanny, almost inarticulately, "vat you call dat ? 77
" The pass-word, la passe parole," exclaimed Pierre crustily.
" Hdas ! I have it not! I will send to de Commandant,
and my servant shall bring it you, demain, in the morn-
ing!" "What! madame ! have you presumed to pass
along my post without the countersign ?" exclaimed Pierre,
affecting the most unqualified astonishment. " Ah ! sare !

POIXT SCRAP-BOOK.

I (lid not know!" replied Fanny, as she prepared to
weep.

Here, the other sentinels, who, in the stillness of the
night, had overheard the dialogue, and knew that some
sport w^as brewing, first ascertained that everything was
quiet, and that there were no lights in the officers 7 tents,
di sorting their posts, came stalking one by one, and
silently arranged themselves by the side of Dubois. En-
veloped in their huge guard cloaks, which they found
necessary to muffle their mouths withal to suppress their
laughter, and, each supporting a formidable weapon, they
formed a tout ensemble that might have alarmed firmer
nerves than those which had been accustomed only to the
applause of the theatre, and were now, for the first time,
made acquainted with rough sounds. The moon shone
with ghastly radiance upon their burnished arms, and as
the light breeze, that gently swayed the neighboring
cedars, blew apart their long cloaks, belts, cartridge-
boxes, brass, and steel, glittering before the eyes of the
lone woman, caused her to shudder with trepidation.

The grave hooded figures moved up to Dubois, nudged
him with their elbows, and muttered sotto voce, " Say, old
boy, keep it up ! " " G-o it, old fellow ; don't let her off,
my ehirkeu ! " "Well done! Pierre, this is rich!"
" Carry it on some more, and I'll invite you to all my
'hashes' next winter!" " Stir her up again, Dubois,
and I'll stand ' the sundries ' tomorrow morning! " " Once
more, old horse-fly, and I'll treat to the liquor at Benny's!"

Could Dubois leel discouraged ?

''Madame," he harangued, "this is the place which

54 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Arnold would have betrayed ! the key of his country's
destinies ! The miserable agent he employed was captured
and ignobly hung ! See yonder house which the traitor
once occupied ! I glow with patriotic rage when I survey
the scene ! As for you, madame, you have committed an
offence, which admits of no excuse before a military
tribunal ! You have attempted wretched woman ! to
pass a sentinel's post without the countersign ! Madame,
you are standing in the footprints of Washington ! Pre-
pare to die ! ! ! " Fanny leaped convulsively from the
earth at these words, and the cadets could hardly suppress
their appreciation of this involuntary pas. " Spare ! oh !
spare rny life ! " implored she, clasping her hands, and
kneeling. " Temptress ! that would have me sully the
immaculate Stars and Stripes ! that would make me the
subject of another infamous page in the history of West
Point! that would have me in the morning summoned
before a drum-head court-martial, tried, condemned, and
by a battery of brazen cannon blown into atqms ! ! !

" Mais, sare, s'tt vous plait, you do not know me ! w

" After such an attempt," interrupted Dubois, with all
the hauteur of a soldier, "pardon my gallantry if I
decline an introduction ! "

" But, sare, chere kind sare, je suis Mdmsette Ellsler la
pauvre Fanny Ellskr\" "What! nay! nay! take any
shape but that, and my honor shall be .preserved ! "

Notwithstanding the inconvenience of his musket,
Pierre's attitude, on pronouncing these words, was decid-
edly dramatic. The attitudes also assumed by the "guard
cloaks " were half in imitation of Dubois, and half of

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Macbeth, when he was about to "clutch that dagger."
To be sure, Dubois all along had recognized the artiste ;
but it did not suit his purposes to let her perceive it.
She saw, however, that the announcement of her name was
to her advantage, and she repeated it. "Ouil Messieurs!
EVxler ! la jolie et qaueuse Fanny ! je vous assure !" added

*/ y J *J */

she, bursting into tear

" Mademoiselle, 7 ' resumed Dubois, after some moments
of profound reflection, " I have already presented before
you, with all the warmth of true patriotism, the dreadful
1 KM i aides I should entail upon mysalf and my country,
if I assented to your escape ; yet (a pause) there is
one condition, now that you have mentioned your name,
in the performance of which, you shall live." " deux!
vat is dat condition ? 77 cried Fanny, drying her tears, and
almost magnetizing Pierre, by the intensity of her gaze.

" I v. 'member what I sacrifice, MaWselle, the land of
rcy fathers ! in this spot, too ! fame ! and life !"

" J/<//x, de condition ! de condition, I will perform it! 77

"Say you so? then will I, and these, my comrades,
S','11 ourselves to the devil, to see you dance the craco-
ine."

AVliat ! She, who had displayed her agility to gaping
thousands! She, who had. as it were, snapped her toes
in the faces of the crowned heads of Europe ! whose
india-rubber limbs had stirred up the souls of the poli-
ticians of Washington, whom the motion for the dissolu-
tion of the Union could not arouse! She, to dance, at
night, and alone, for the amusement of an unknown squad
of cade

56 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

" Sacre ! Perte ! mon Dieuf c j ext simplement impos-
sible ! I cannot do it, " said Fanny, now thoroughly indig-
nant.

"Die! then! proud, insensible, and ungrateful wo-
man ! !" cried Pierre, in awful accents, preparing to raise
his piece. " Hold !" interrupted Fanny, who loved her
life more than her dignity, but who still hoped to evade
the disagreeable condition by a subterfuge. "I would
dance avec plaisir, mais, Messieurs, vare is dare orchestra,
^de trombone, de flute de feedle ? I cannot dance
widout de musique /"

The "guard cloaks' 7 consulted for a few moments.
" Oh !" at length said Dubois, " you shall be provided
with music, I'll whistle !"

The degradation was complete.

1 1 Nevare ! nevare ! jamais ! jamais ! ! Monsieur !" cried
Fanny convulsively.

The "guard cloaks " scowled, and clutched their mus-
kets. "That, or death ! !" croaked Pierre, making a final
effort, " and, remember, maWselle, our sacrifice !" Fan-
ny considered ; her resolution failed her ; " Ah me ! gen-
tils hommes. I will dance !"

The muskets were stacked, the guard cloaks reclined on
he grass. The moon shone with a serene and silvery
lustre upon the strange group. The dew-drops sparkled
in their splendor, and through the adjacent cedars, the
white monument of the "Polish chieftain" peered upon
the scene. It was with immense labor, and only after

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 57

duction of a whistle ; those appendages manifesting a
singular tendency to approach his ears.

At last, however, he mustered up courage to subdue
his laughing propensities sufficiently to whistle the craco-
vienne. after the manner of a softened solo upon the flute.

Mci/m'selle, with a very drooping, willow-like air, exe-
cuted the pirouette by moonlight ; the guard cloaks imita-
ting, as well as they could, the pit of a theatre. They
clapped their hands, threw up their caps, and shouted ;
(in whispers, so as not to awaken the officers) they encored
every feat, until Fanny 's feet were wearied out, and
Pierre's lungs entirely exhausted. Miss Ellsler now made
a motion to retire. " No, not yet!" objected Dubois,
breathing hard to refresh himself; " we must have la
cachuca; we could incur the fate of Andre to see that, and
besides, I whistle the air admirably." The remonstrances
of Fanny were overruled once more, the guard cloaks
changed their supporting elbows, Jupiter snuffed the
moon, and the white monument peered through the foliage
with more intense curiosity. Dubois contracted 4iis lips,
the melancholy Ellsler stood in the act to dance, one foot
raisrd like Xiobe, preparing to cut a "pigeon-wing"
when "Second Relief! turn out!" the Corporal of the
Guard cried out in the distant guard- tent, knocking the
floor with the butt of his musket to arouse the slumbering
guard. The two hours of our friends had expired. Ris-
ing hastily, and, grasping their muskets from the stack,
they fled hurriedlv to their deserted Dosts, alarmed bv the

58 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Fanny was bewildered by the sudden, and to her, unac-
countable movements of her tormentors, but she had
presence of mind enough to change the preliminary pas
of la cachuca into the first bound towards the hotel. On
her way there she encountered Monsieur Sylvester coming
to her relief at the head of a crowd of waiters and boot-
blacks, armed with brooms, pokers, and clubs, and crying
at the top of his voice, " Ellsler to the rescue! We will
storm the camp ! By Gar ! ! "

Perhaps Ma'm'selle was still offended with him for his
precipitate retreat earlier in the evening, or she might
have doubted his ability to perform all that he threatened ;
at least she muttered with some asperity in his ear that
they had rendered themselves sufficiently ridiculous, and
that he had better beat a retreat, as his skill in that line
was so great.

M. Sylvester obeyed, although he protested, sacred, and
boasted at a terrible rate about what he would have done
had Ma'm'selle but just given the word. The next morn-
ing it was ascertained that the danseuse with her com-
pany had left West Point before day. After the night-
guard had been relieved by a new detail, a crowd of
cadets were assembled in conversation, lamenting that
they could not witness her performances, then creating
such a sensation throughout the country.

Dubois here remarked very consequentially, that he,
with some others, had seen her the night before in the cra-
covienne, and in part of la cachuca.

He was answered by universal exclamations of incredu-
lity, when he related the foregoing story, and the six
others swore to its accuracy.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

BENNY HAVENS, OH!

Benny Havens was a seller of contraband liquors and
viands to the cadets. In course of time he was expelled
from the immediate vicinity of the Point, and then opened
a regular establishment a mile or two below, which until

KKXXY HAVENS.

a few years past was a favorite resort of the cadets on
convivial occasions, " sans permission."

The lamented O'Brien, formerly an Assistant Surgeon
in the army, was commissioned a Lieutenant in the 8th

60 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Infantry. Before joining his regiment he stopped at
West Point to visit an early friend, Major Ripley A.
Arnold, then a first-class man, residing in "No. 32 Rue
de Cockloft," in the old North Barracks. They made
many excursions to "Benny's. The song was composed
by O'Brien and others, and set to the tune of " Wearing of
the Green." It soon became popular, and from that time
to this, all those who have learned the way to " Benny's,"
consider it an old stand-by.

The verse relative to the death of O'Brien, and all the
others following it, were written afterwards by the differ-
ent classes.

BENNY HAVENS, OH!

Come, fill your glasses, fellows, and stand up in a row,
To singing sentimentally, we're going for to go ;
In the army there's sobriety, promotion's very slow,
So we'll sing our reminiscences of Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! oh ! Benny Havens, oh !
So we'll sing our reminiscences of Benny Havens, oh !

Now Hoe's Hotel's a perfect "fess," and Cozzens' all the go,
And officers as thick as hops infest " The Falls " below ;
But we'll slip them all so quietly, as once a week we go
To toast the lovely flower that blooms at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

Let us toast our foster father, the Kepublic, as you know,

Who in the paths of science taught us upward for to go ;

And the maidens of our native land, whose cheeks like roses glow,

They're oft remembered in our cups, at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh !

To the lac

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 61

J-C

o the ladies of the Empire State, whose hearts, and albums too,
Bear sad remembrance of the wrongs we stripling soldiers do,
e bid a fond adieu, my boys ; our hearts with sorrow flow ;
Our loves and rhymings had their source at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

And when in academic halls, to summer hops we go,
And tread the mazes of the dance on the light fantastic toe,
We look into those sunny eyes, where youth and pleasure glow,
And think ourselves within the walls of Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

Tot

'o the ladies of the orange clime, let all our bumpers flow,
Who dares gainsay their peerless charms must take a knightly blow.
"We'll throw the gauntlet in their cause and taunt the soulless foe
Who hesitates to drink to them at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

Of the lovely maids, with virgin lips, like roses dipped in dew,
Who are to be our better halves, we'd like to take a view.
But sufficient to the bridal day is the ill of it, you know,
So we'll cheer our hearts with chorusing at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

To the ladies of our army our cups shall ever flow,
Companions of our exile, and our shield 'gainst every woe ;
May they see their husbands Generals, with double pay also,
And join us in our choruses at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

'Tis said by commentators, when to other worlds we go,
We follow the same handicraft we did in this below ;
If this be true philosophy the sexton he says "no!"
WTiat days of song and dance we'll have at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

62 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Come, fill up to our Generals, God bless the brave heroes,
They're an honor to their country, and a terror to her foes;
May they long rest on their laurels and trouble never know,
But live to see a thousand years at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

Here's a health to General Taylor, whose "rough and ready" blow
Struck terror to the rancheros of braggart Mexico ;
May his country ne'er forget his deeds, and ne'er forget to show,
She holds him worthy of a place at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

To the " veni, vidi, vici " man, to Scott, the great hero,
Fill up the goblet to the brim, let no one shrinking go ;
May life's cares on his honored head fall light as flakes of snow,
And his fair fame be ever great at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

From the courts of death and danger, from Tampa's deadly shore,
There comes a wail of manly grief, "O'Brien is no more ;"
In the land of sun and flowers his head lies pillowed low,
No more he'll sing " Petite Coquette," or Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

To the Army's brave Commanders, let now our glasses flow,
We'll drink to Grant and Sherman, and to the " subs " also ;
To Thomas, Meade, and Sheridan (these come in apropos) ;
We'll toast them all with goblets full, at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

'Tis a proverb that " Republics to their veterans thankless
And a youth of service oft awards only an age of woe ;
But if a lowly station most honor doth bestow,
Give me the one now occupied by Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 63

To our regiments, now fellows, we all must shortly go,
And look as sage as parsons when they talk of what's below ;
We must cultivate the graces, do everything "just so,"
And never speak to ears polite of Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

Let us remember, comrades, when to our posts we go,
The ties that must be cut in twain, as o'er life's sea we row ;
Hearts that now throb in unison must moulder down below,
So let us take a parting cup at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

To our comrades who have fallen, one cup before we go,
They poured their life-blood freely out pro bono pablico ;
No marble points the stranger to where they rest below, /
They lie neglected far away from Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

You veterans on the " half -pay list " in quiet ease should go,
And suffer us subalterns up a grade or two to row,
Award each State a regiment of Regulars, you know,-
Their officers are chosen ones from Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

May we never lack a smile for friend, nor stern heart for a foe,

Ma\ all our paths be pleasantness wherever we may go,

^
May our " muster rolls" in after years report in statu quo,

And goodly samples ever bring from Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

May the Army be augmented, promotion be less slow,
May our country in her hour of need be ready for the foe,
May we find a soldier's resting-place beneath a soldier's blow,
"With space enough beside our graves for Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

64 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

When you and I, and Benny, and all the others, too,
Are called before tho " final board " our course of life to view,
May we never " fess " on any point, but straight be told to go,
And join the army of the Blest at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

Another star has faded, we miss its brilliant glow,
For the veteran Scott has ceased to be a soldier here below;
And the country which he honored now feels a heartfelt woe,
As we toast his name in reverence at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

To our kind old Alma Mater, our rock-bound Highland home,
"We'll cast back many a fond regret, as o'er life's sea we roam,
Until on our last battle-field the lights of Heaven shall glow,
We'll never fail to drink to her and Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

And if amid the battle shock, our banner e'er should trail,
And hearts that beat beneath its folds, shall faint, or basely fail,
Then may some son of Benny's, with quick avenging blow,
Lift up the flag we loved so well at Benny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc.

When this life's troubled sea is o'er, and our last battle through,
If God permits us mortals then his blessed domain to view ,
Then shall we see with glory crowned, in proud celestial row,
The friends we've known and loved so well at Bonny Havens, oh !

Oh ! Benny Havens, oh ! etc

A FRAGMENT.

If " churches " point the way to heaven,

As sign-posts do the road,
How many " January Plebes "

Have found that blest abode !

WEST POINT EXPERIENCE.

By a Lady.

r oung ladies, and misses, I pray you

To list to a tale, though not new,
It may give you a little instruction

About the " Grey" and the " Blue."
Your first year is devoted to Cadets,

And you vow to be loyal and true ;
You are sure that your love will remain,

When he changes the " grey " for the " blue."

WKST 1'OIXT HOTKL.

So " sets of ball buttons " for dresses,

Are exchanged for a lock of your hair ;
A\ cro barracks searched after encampment,
It would make up a Vanity Fair.

itli tears, and hearts nearly breaking,
You declare that your love naught shall try,
And truly detesting the creatures,

it Pointers have christened "shanghais."

66 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Next year, you find to your sorrow,

He's proved but a faithless Cadet,
And you go to a " blue-coat," the morrow,

And find you've some heart to give yet.
Then the " blue-coat " will grow sentimental,

Convince you he is deeply in love;
But "never by word of committal,

That you anywhere after could prove.
He'll preach the hard life of a soldier,

Though softened by some fair one's smile,
But is sure not to add "it is you, dear !"

Though this you expect all the while.
He'll give you a button or a locket,

And attach it, with heart-rending sighs,
To your chain; but add not " I've a pocket.

Kept for just such occasions supplied."
And the evening before your departure,

When in whispers so low he will say,
" I'll not believe you are going !

Oh ! defer your departure one day /"
When just as you think it is coming,

And you think he is safe in your coil,
With a sort of volcanic explosion

Called a sigh-: used by him as a foil ;
" Oh ! my destiny ! Fate has decreed !

My youth, it is saddened, and drear !
For I never will ask any woman

To live on eight hundred a year !"
Then he looks apparently wretched,

Bids adieu, as the boat leaves the dock,
But his sole consolation, and hope is,

That the " next boat " will bring a large flock.
So, learn, all you foolish young damsels,

My rule no exception can claim.
But take a West Pointer's motto

" It is here every day just the same."

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

ARMY HYMN.

He who wears the regimental suit,
Is oft as gay as a raw recruit ;

But what of that?

The girls will follow when they hear the drum,
To view the tassel, and the waving plume,

Which decks his hat.

CHORUS.

Off, off we go, and say that we're on duty,
Smoke our cigars, or flirt with some new beauty,
Vive, Vive 1'amour ! cigars and cogniac !
Hurrah ! hurrah ! hurrah, boys ! vive la bivouac !

"When we march into some country town,
Prudes may fly from us, and dames may frown ;

But that's absurd !

When we march away we leave behind
Prudes and dames who've been vastly kind ;

Pray take my word.

CHORUS.

Off, off we go, and say'that we're on duty,
Smoke our cigars, or flirt with some new beauty.
Vive, vive 1'amour ! cigars and cogniac !
Hurrah ! hurrah ! hurrah, boys ! vive la bivouac !

A SONNET TO "ANALYTICAL."

Of all the girls I ever knew,
The one I've most neglected,

Is called Miss " Anna Lytical,"
For her I've least respected.

68 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Oh ! Anna ! Anna Lytical
I'll never love you more,

For you, I fear, will cause my fall,
And make me leave the Corps.

And now, oh ! Anna Lytical !

I hope that " Albert K,"
Before the " Board," will not give out

A word of you to me.

For if he does, now Anna,
I tremble at the sound,

For my examination would
Result in being " found."

Oh ! cruel Anna Lytical !

"With truth I now can say,
I fear you'll never let me see

My " Graduating day."

A REPLY TO WEST POINT EXPERIENCE.

By One Interested.

Now, "West Point experience," fair ladies!

Is not all your own, let me say ;
For though an old bird at this writing,

I've been caught by " chaff " in my day.
If Cadets take walks only tending

To show off the view from " Cro' Nest,"
The intent of their gentle companions,

You, ladies, must surely know best.
How you sigh, and say " love in a cottage

With the man of your choice would be joy ! "

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

How you smile, and say "poverty's nothing! "
And so you take in the poor boy ;

How kindly a bright tress you give him,
And vow 'tis the first man's bereft,

When the truth is, you've cut it so often,
'Tis a wonder you have any left.

ROAD TO COZZENS' DOCK.

How you smile away sets of brass buttons,
AVliich you wear as your "trophies of war ; "

Then say, when you're asked where they came from,
" Oh, from ' stupid,' a terrible bore ! "

70 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

However, this fever's not lasting,

The " Grey " summer cloud fades away,
And the " Blue " receives some attention,

" Here's another poor victim ! " you say.
Then you fling off the traffic in ribbons.

Buttons fall in the market straightway,
And the once irresistible cadet,

Like the dog in the song, 's had his day.
There's one point of sameness, however :

In your speeches to the " Grey" and the "Blue,"
You dote on a life of adventure,

And rather like poverty too ;
As you wander 'long pleasant " Flirtation,"

If you feel at all pensive or sad,
You wonder how earth has such sorrow,

Or if joy can ever be had.
And your eyes, "blue," or "black," are so tearful,

And your voice is so mournful and low,
Your hand rests so near where his heart is,

That to press it 's quite natural you know ;
Then you kindly smile at the pressure,

You sigh like the summer wind's breath,
And as soldiers are always soft-hearted,

He vows he will love you till death !
But alas ! when the walk is all over

And the tears are all safe put away
For your use on a future occasion,

Then, says " Blue " " What the deuce did I say ?
Now eyes filled with tears are quite touching,

And sighs are correct, I suppose,
But I've only my small pay to live on;

As she most undoubtedly knows,
So if she wants to flirt, I'm quite willing,

As I've nothing at present to hinder."
So up springs a West Point flirtation,

And two hearts are reduced to a cinder.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

But new ones soon rise from the ashes

Like Phoenix, that famed bird of yore,
And experience teaching them nothing,

They change partners and try it once more.
All ! damsels ! if we soothe our sorrows

By hoping for " more by the boat,"
Don't you smile on the very first " cit "

That comes when you are fairly afloat ?

A SLIGHT INVECTIVE AGAINST MECHANICS.

Oh, "Phil!" oh, "Phil!"
Against my will,
I "bone "ye,
Your M V 2
Phenomena queer
Unknown rules,
And molecules,
Psi's and Sigma's,
Queer enigmas ;
Curves cycloidal
And 'lipsoidal ;
Fluids viscous,
Mixed promiscuous ;
Constrained motion,
[What a notion!]
Systems rigid,
[Fesses frigid!]
All kinds of centres,
[Max preventers!]
Brains fuddle,
Senses muddle.
Each Caballero
Getting zero ;
Curses ye ! !

72 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

THE COUNTERSIGN.

Lieutenant Thomas A. Wilton was ordered to the Acad-
emy as an Instructor in Infantry Tactics, early in the
encampment of 1855. The camp was then called " Camp
Calhoun." Lieutenant Wilton was a very large, portly
man, with rather a good-natured countenance, though not
indicative of much firmness.

He was " run on " pretty badly in the early part of his
instructorship, and, in consequence, determined, when he
entered barracks, to crush the corps with the iron heel of
severity. He was, accordingly, so unsparing in his re-
ports as to render himself universally unpopular. The
cadets, as a matter of course, employed every method of
retaliation. His room was broken into, his bed inverted,
all his prime cigars were smoked, and numerous other
atrocities were committed.

Names without number were contrived for him, such as
"Prize Baby, 7 ' " Mammoth Pig/ 7 and above all, "the
Fatted Calf. 77 In every place this "Fatted Calf 7 ' could
see his cognomen written, on every side he could hear of
its being repeated. He was even so designated by his
brother officers, and every one that came to the Point
heard of it.

A little incident will serve to show to what extent the
name spread. He called one day at the residence of a
lady in the Point, and during the conversation that en-
sued, a little girl, in an eager though reprehensible
search after knowledge, broke out, as little children will,

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 73

in this manner : " Ma ! what makes them call Mr. Wilton
the Fatted Calf?

"Hush! my child! 77 The child would not be hushed,
and repeated her inquiry in a more audible tone.

Lieutenant Wilton heard it, and blushed up to his eye-
brows ; crossed his legs to dispel his discomfiture. The
child saw the blush, and attributing it to another cause,
came forth with this stunner of an exclamation :

"You need not blush, Mr. Wilton, if you have got a
hole in your stocking ! "

Overwhelmed with confusion, and muttering deep curses
on all little children, he beat a hasty retreat.

Time rolled on and the whole year was a constant scene
of strife between Wilton and the cadets.

Every time a seasonable opportunity presented itself,
the "Fatted Calf" would roll up some unfortunate cadet's
amount of demerit by a "pink/ 7 and the cadets would
retaliate by every means in their power.

Thus passed the year, until the first class, who were
prime movers in the matter, had graduated, and then a

ming truce was declared. When the corps entered
camp, the " Fatted Calf 77 was remarkably docile, and
" pinked " but little ; he was evidently in favor of a lasting
peace. Passing over subsequent events, we come to the
incident which forfns the subject of these remarks, known
as the "countersign. 77 He was seated one evening, hold-
ing a conversation with several ladies on the hotel piaxxa.
The ladies expivssnl a strong desire to sec a real parole
and countersign. Lieutenant Wilton, proud of having
ladies ask him for information, called a small boy to his

74 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

side, and majestically commanded him to " run to the
Guard tents, and tell the Officer of the Guard to send him
the parole and countersign for the night." During his
short absence, Wilton endeavored to explain the use of
the cabalistic words, and added that a great deal of inge-
nuity was used in getting them up, and that frequently
the names of some of the ladies on the Point were taken
in the selection. Expectation ran high, each lady, of
course, hoping that her name was the one to be in many
mouths that evening. Meanwhile the juvenile emissary
was searching for the Officer of the Guard. Alighting, in
the course of his search, upon a cadet who was particularly
"up to snuff," he prayed for a little information concern-
ing the whereabouts of that functionary, adding the object
of his errand.

This cadet, seeing a fine chance for fun, told him to wait
an instant and he would procure the article for him. Then
hastily disappearing in a neighboring tent, and doing some
hurried scribbling, he soon reappeared with a small piece
of paper which he handed to the boy, assuring him that
Lieutenant Wilton would be pleased, wonderfully pleased
with it.

The boy ran with haste to the hotel and delivered the
object of so much care to the proper recipient of it.

W r ith all the nonchalance he could summon, Wilton
opened the note, and was about to read it aloud, when, to
the astonishment of his lady friends, he swore ! !

He paced to and fro on the piazza with more vigor than
he had ever been known to display, and finally seized his
hat, and went no one knew whither !

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 75

The ladies were unable to comprehend this sudden out-
burst from their usually calm, if not collected friend. As
they were canvassing the matter, they perceived the note
which Wilton, in his fury, had dashed to the floor. It
was picked up aii'l opened. The mystery was soon
explained. The gallant officer had not suddenly become
a maniac.

The paper was handed around, and there they saw
inscribed :

Parole Fatted.

Countersign Calf.

This called to the unfortunate's mind the hated sobri-
quet which he had so fondly, but vainly, hoped was forgot-
ten. It is needless to add that the ladies having witnesses
to this joke, it soon became known everywhere, and the
" Fatted Calf," unable to endure the accumulation of
misery, applied for orders, and was relieved from duty at
the Academy, thus turning his back upon the scene of so
much misery and woe.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

GKADUATING CLASS SONG OF 1848.

This world we may find an awful tough "grind,"

As we wander its mazes through,
But with right stout hearts we'll play our parts,

When we change the Grey for the Blue.

CHORUS.
Hurrah for the merry, bright, manly fame,

That opens a life so new,
"When we doff the Cadet and don the Brevet

And change the Grey for the Blue.

To the struggles of youth, to its pleasures forsooth,

To our sports and our follies, adieu,
"We are now for the strife, for the battle of life,

As we change the Grey for the Blue.

CHORUS.

As the grey of the morn is changed by the sun,

To the azure of heaven's bright hue,
So the morn of our time ripens fast to its prime,

When we change the Grey for the Blue.

CHORUS.

Some clouds may arise and o'ershadow our skies,
But the sunbeams will surely break through,

With crimson and gold thro' each silver fold,
When we change the Grey for the Blue.

CHORUS.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

WEST POINT LIFE.

(Read before the Dialectic Society, March 5, 1859.)

West Point life, I said, should be the subject of this strain ;
Thinking on the matter long, I strained my brain in vain.
I reflected, called on some accomodating muse,
Mused in vain, and found them all determined to refuse ;
Chose a noble patron then, and made another move,
Knew our worthy President would a Maecenas prove.
Do not criticise ; you see this sheet looks now aghast
At the array of beauty where to-night the " ' Di. ' is cast."

You're first, a " cit.," you sport a hat and standing collar,

Seek along the paths of peace the bright almighty dollar ;

Think you're free, but find you have a " governor " absurd ;

Though you are a citizen you're subject to his word.

Suddenly you feel a passion rising in your soul,

A military ardor which no one can control.

You hear of West Point School, where they turn great warriors out,

Still you stop and hesitate, on this jwint there's a doubt.

When you doze in bed that night, you mutter, prate, and prattle,

Think j-ou wear a uniform, see drums, and hear a battle ;

Dream of bullet buttons, plumes, of ladies' smiles and fun,

W;iking in the morning, you are off to Washington.

With nine hundred others on the President you charge ;

Seeing this vast number, they say you apply "at large."

Now you show you've many claims, and can't be called a meddler,

Prove your great-grandfather once, in England, whipped a peddler.

Your father lived to eighty-five, like many other men,

But having lost his parents, was a helpless orphan then.

Your great -great-great-grandfather died in battle, that's the truth ;

Your great-great-great-grandmother lived ten years without a tooth.

With many others back you come, with glory unanointed,

The President appoints but ten, the rest are (/^-appointed.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

You next go to your Congressman, who's honest, true, and just ;
He finds you'll pass, 'tis all he wants, you'll not disgrace his trust.
Thinking on your future life, you find your speculations
Interrupted by a list of unknown qualifications :
You get a pen to see if you remember how to write,
A splinter's in your thumb, you may not be pronounced all right;
You have some corns, and fear with these, rejection you may meet,
For many active soldiers have been " found " upon their feet.
How careful and how studious we find the young expectant,
For fear this rigid Board will find a true bill of ejectment ;
Yet soon you see kind sympathy is in their bosoms stored,
And find the proverb true, that " There's a soft side to a board"
"When landed on the Point, you ask a man where you'll report,
And ten to one, you'll get from him a withering retort;

He'll say, " Subordination, Plebe, of discipline's the root ;"

Now you've addressed an old Cadet, forgetting to " salute."

He sends you to a room, and says, "Keport and then come back;"

You enter, and discover there, none but the old shoe-black ;

Your father's with you all the time he here begins to croak

And, judging from his countenance, he doesn't like the joke.

You wander like Telemachus at last you find the place,

And see the dread Instructor ; Yes ! you meet him face to face ;

He cries, " Now stand, attention; put your hands close to your pants !

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 79

" And stand erect, hold up your head. There ! steady ! don't ad-
vance !

" Turn your toes still farther out, and look straight to the front,
" Draw in* your chin, throw out your chest. There ! steady ! don't

you grunt !"

You hold your head so high, that the Instructor's lost to view,
And looking at your father, there he "stands attention," too,
Says th' Instructor, " Where's my pen ? This old one does not suit

me."

" There it is, sir." " Hold your tongue ! you must not talk on duty,
I'm not surprised to see you quail, and flutter like a partridge,
But soldiers' mouths must open only when they tear a cartridge !"
He asks you if you've brought along the articles marked thus:(*)
And when he finds you havn't, raises quite a little fuss.
He wants to know all things you've brought, your clothes of every

kind;
You think the gentleman's endowed with an inquiring mind.

You get a broom, some matches, and a bed made up of patches,
Though little did you think such schools could ever have their

matches;

You know where "matches all are made," and give a knowing sneer;
From what you've seen, you think that place is very far from here.
A comforter you also get, the thing that most you need,
A comforter!! It's one of Job's; a sorry one indeed.

80 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

" On your return, report yourself," they earnestly exhort you.
Report yourself! ! ! when twenty men are eager to report you !
You're now assigned to quarters there deposit bed and broom,
And though in want of shelter, wish for you there was no room.
Are these the luxuries on which our Senators agree ?
You do not fancy this " hot-bed of aristocracy."

The drill-drum beats, so does your heart, and down the stairs you

scud,

You slip before you reach the ranks, fall full length in the mud.
Here you have met your first reverse, and give a ghastly grin,
You think your district now could say, " Our candidate's got in."
All over mud, you now demand a suit in your distress,
But find for all such slight mishaps they give you no re-dress.
How strange you think it, when next night, reported you have been,
In spite of all your efforts, for neglecting to " fall in."
The food you say is scanty, and you do not like the stuff,
Though there's a hen for each of you, you never get unceuf (enough).
A graduating man sees you, some side-long glances throws,
Thinks he would like to trade his mattress for your suit of clothes.
He says, when coming up to you, all buttoned to the throat,
" Has anyone said anything to you about your coat ?"
Mistaking him, you say, " Same old cadets, whose jokes are stale,
Cried after me when passing by, 'Just see that shanghai tail !' "
At last you get the mattress, and remove it with hard tugs;
Republicans are right who say that here you find big bugs.

While reading in your room, absorbed in prison discipline,
You suddenly hear some one knock jump up, and cry, " Come
You find your dread instructor is already in the door.
He sa>s, " Did you give that command to your superior ?"
You ask to be forgiven, say you'll never do so more,
You didn't yet know all the "rules and articles of war."

Next day they march you into camp. How pretty it does
That you may fare the better, you have brought a cookery-bool

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

You get in camp, an old cadet cries, " Come, put up this tent !"
And with the aid he renders you, you're very well content.
You thank him, take possession; when you find that all is done,
He coolly tells you, " Plebe, it's mine; go, get some other one;
" What you have done is only play; Plebes must make some mis-
takes."

Foul play, you think it is, in which you've put up all the stakes.
To hoist another for yourself, your efforts now are bent;
Oa studying the art of war, you find yourself intent.
You've brought some dozen suits of clothes, but give a solemn look,
To find the space assigned to them, is but a cubic foot.
Never mind, you'll soon be great take Cuba, end your trials,
Then, instead of cubic feet, you'll have some cubic miles.

Now come drills, those long squad drills, upon the scorching plain,

Like people in the desert wilds, your only hope is rain.

Sand gets in your shoes, and rubs and burns like lighted candles,

Wonder why the people in such soil do not wear sandul*.

Though drums disturb you every hour, you utter not a word,

But think how happy Sir John Moore, when "not a drum was

heard."

You probably are six feet high, some officer you dread,
Arrests you at the break of day for lying lony in bnl.
Your coat is made, you button it, give one spasmodic cough,
And do not draw another breath until you take it off.
You've heard of Senators who make a speech up in great haste,
And long for what they mention, the Cadet's small "w

waist."

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

How singular the conduct of these wisdom-bearing herds !

If waists are to be laughed at, it should be their waste of words.

July the Fourth at last arrives you think it rather hard
"When on this day of Liberty, the " Plebes " must go on guard.
You go on post, the night arrives, you scarcely are alive,
But still a lonely watch you're keeping down on "No. 5."
First you like this quiet post, the path's so nicely levelled;
Soon you share the fate of ham that is, you're nicely " devilled."
Bodies vast of men approach, and sound their rude alarms;
From divers punches you receive, you find they all have arms.

Baggage-wagons, ropes, and ghosts upon your post appear,
Teeth begin to chatter though of course, it's not through fear.

A spirit white you seize upon, and hold it on your post,
Until the corporal arrives, when you give up the ghost.
When in a one-wheeled cart you fall, that's moving up behind,
To rapidly desert your post you're forcibly inclined.

A. storm comes up, the rain comes down, and soaks your thin white

pants ;
You think they might find better work for "tender hot-house

plants."

Now if your pants were made of cloth, you wouldn't care a shilling,
But like your summer afternoons, they're all made up of drilling.

WEST POIXT SCRAP-BOOK.

Then you say you shall resign, the climate is too damp,
But once within the tented field, you find you can't decamp.
Resolving then to be content, there's no more hesitation,
You find more satisfaction in this kind of resignation ;
Spartan-like, you stay until encampment has an end,
In this period you find your times bogin to mend.

"When iu the art of soldiery you ve once become adepts,

You welcome with a joyous smile the coming of the " Seps ; "

Those that come before the time are pre-cepts for the rest,

Who wait outside till camp breaks up, and think the barracks best.

The first who come walk into camp with quite a lordly step,

For where is found more dignity than in an August " Sep ? "

The noted " Twenty-ninth " arrives, and crowds of folks attend,

For camp, like all things, save a hoop, you find must have an end.

Our honored General-in Chief is there to see the sights,

Whoso valiant arm so often won the victory in our fights.

Some drummers come, all armed with sticks, you know there'll be a

fray,

They've come to " beat the General," you plainly hear them say ;
Base cowards ! you think, thus to attack a man of such great fame ;
You'll go and warn him of their threat, immortalize your name.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Running through the crowd in breathless haste, at last you meet

him,

"Whisper " there's a mutiny, some men have come to beat him."
He thinks you joke. (Bad joke says you, that's given you such a

bother.)
Pats your head and says, " You'll be a man before your mother."

Camp's broken up, you're broken down, you've come to the belief
You'd like to always be on guard, for there is a relief.
Filled with joys of barrack life, a letter home you send,
Soon you find " of making many books there is no end."

T/V,

Much study, too, you must admit, when starting out afresh,
Although you call it" boning," is quite weary to

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

You meet new hardships every day, yourself you are beside,
You get a problem in Descriptive which you can't describe ;

You go to fencing, and we'd think, from punches, wounds, and scars,
That you could kill as many men as can the Erie cars.
That this will be no use to you, you often make complaint,
Save at examination, when you want to try a feint (faint),

>'///-'> / ( ^

#'< t

-v\V

*{ 7 J_ g*jj/

Or when you try to bugle it, he will not wait for Bentz.

You look at your instructor, and would like to take offence (a fence).

They put you in the nursery that is, in Company "B."

In January, many children, foundlings prove to be ;

86 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Those who leave, excuses make, and one will say, though smarter

Than half the fellows in his class, they did not make him " marker ;"

Others say the board's too high, take vessels in the offing,

Cruise in the Gulf, since men-of-war are boarded there for nothing.

You weather through the year and find that June's not very far,

Which finally arrives, and you a " Plebe " no longer are,

To leave your gloomy barrack-rooms you're summoned by the drum,

And many hearts beat high to think Third Class encampment's come,

When you find you all are men, and are no longer babies,

Think you must devote your whole attention to the ladies,

Go to hops, those charming hops, where all is so exciting,

Sashes red, and buttons bright, black eyes that shoot forth lightning.

As thus you pass your life away, of death you've not a fear,

Find hops will always make you look with favor on the bier,

You give a girl your buttons, lace, at last you throw your heart in,

You little think whatyfames will rise when first you go out sparkin,

An angel dressed in crinoline, you to her side, now becks,

As she must still remain " unknown," we'll have to call her " X."

She occupies one half the room, the space is more than fair,

If radius we call large K, the area's TT K 2 .

The rustle of her dress alone would charm ten thousand troops,

Much pleasanter the sound than that of wild Camanche whoops.

You blush whene'er " X " looks at you from out that mass of lace,

Which proves that " X " must enter the { ' expression " of your face.

The music starts, you gently take her in your arms. What bliss !

You now can say you have your " X " in a parenthesis.

" Faster still " she whispers, though you're giddy and half sick,

Your heart which once kept " common time," now moves at " double

quick."

Faster yet you're going round, ten " X's " now you see,
She hugs you with her sleeveless arms till you cry " Bare with me,''
To get yourself from her embrace you'd now give fifty farms !
Says she: " Since you're a soldier you shall have, sir, two bare a?

(to bear arms).

Your head's becoming dizzier, you stagger a good deal,
And what was started as a waltz is ending in a reel.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Sash comes down, she steps on it, to fall is now your doom,
And knock down nine Militia Generals standing in the room.
By deafening sounds of drums the hour of ten is intimated,
All rush madly from the room, " X" is now "eliminated."
To marry her you're half inclined, " Shall you not or shall you ?'
Half the night you lie awake discussing ' X's " value.

Text day you take a walk with her around the famed " Flirtation,"
Find her all false hair, false teeth, false smiles, and affectation.
That she may have an honest heart is still your honest prayer,
But soon you find the heart no better than the teeth and hair.
While swearing that you love her, and appreciate her oharms,
You tell her you're a soldier, she says "But a child in arms."
Others come, and better ones, who stop at the hotel,
Oh ! what a tale of broken hearts that old north stoop could tell !
Then come little presents of a kerchief, ribbons, gloves,
And what is prized above the rest, they often give their loves.
Some who sew on handkerchiefs, what shall we say of them ?
When questioned what they're working at will simply say " a-Ju-m."

Another " Twenty-ninth " arrives, the camp again is struck,
This time you go out quietly, and have much better luck.
To breaking up the scenes of camp you've serious objections,
For ladies, hops, " Flirtation " walks, give place to conic sections.

WEST POINT SCRAP-B-)OK.

Troubles do not leave you here, you must have some, of course ;
Strange as you may think it, you must learn to ride a horse.
You have read of bold dragoons that every danger scoff,
Stories do not speak, alas ! of troopers falling off.
Nothing on your feet but shoes, the horses bare-backed all,
How will ever you obey the Boots and Saddle call ?
Many books have you toiled through, all written by great sages,
Do not you deserve a pair, if spurs are won by pages ?
Now you "stand to horse," and say you'll not get in a fright,
Still you ask a soldier if he thinks your horse will bite.

Then you mount a thing that you before had never tried,
Make a mighty effort landing on the other side.
Finally you get your seat, the other troopers follow,
Horse's back's a catenary, you are in the hollow.
When seated in this valley the instructor's heard to say,
Like Joseph to his brethren " Do not fall out by the way."
Horses move, the riders too, and things look queer to you,
Seldom have you seen the world from such a point of view.
And when your horse begins to trot, you think he's not so tame,
You're not much of a rider, but a good boy in the mane.
Reaching back you make a grab, and clinch with every nail,
Think you'd be relieved to have the burden of his tail.
Speed increases, now you try to seize your reins. Don't falter !
Can't call this a bridle tour, you've only reached the (h) alter.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Your instructor sees you bounce until your cheeks look floppy,

Thinks you've ridden on the course, how nicely you can " jockey."

Looking round, you see your friends are now disposed to banter,

Think you'll get another horse, yours doesn't pace nor canter.

Suddenly he takes the gallop; horrors! ! ! what a motion !

Movement comes from front to rear like waves upon the ocean.

Soon you're told he gallops wrong; to make him change the step,

Teach him then as you've been taught by loudly crying " Hep 1 "

All your efforts are in vain, and forth your mutterings burst,

Still looking out for " No. 1," he " puts his best foot first,"

And by using gentle means his favor can't be courted,

Wonder why instead of you the horse is not reported.

Getting sea-sick now you roll from one side to the other,

How you wish you'd never left the fireside of your mother.

A whip is cracked, the horse's head goes down and you go up,

And from the rate of travel think that in the skies you'll sup.

Up you go till near the roof, but do not reach the skies,

Think you are an aeronaut, but surely air not Wise.

What goes up comes down again, and you, with looks not placid,

Are making crude experiments in testing tannic acid.

A spring some call this, some a/a//, and some a summer-set,

A seasonable joke is heard to come from each cadet.

Limping out, you start for home and think you've earned your salary,

Meet with sympathizing looks from ladies in ihe gallery.

With your lady friends up there you've fallen half in love,

All cadets have learned to set their hearts on " things above."

To take a gallop in the hall again you would not dare,

Although you would not hesitate to take a gal up there.

Some will say that riding's fun, such views you can't endorse,

Say you'll never ride again save on o hobby horse.

Now you think of other things, for home you soon will go,
That period of bliss to spend, that's called cadet furlough.
Furlough clothes you then get on, demerit you get off;
Donning thus a suit of blue, the grey you gladly doff.
When you've reached the city, and arrived at your hotel,

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Heedless of expenses, you are bound to " cut a swell."
See a classmate followed round by boys at least a score,
Say he shan't surpass you, so you hire twenty more.
If his train of little boys has each a dirty face,
Make your own roll in the mud, determined to keep pace.

Though you know your leave ia not to leave the States, you do,

Heedless of the consequences, Jersey you pass through.

Hurrying along as happy as a man can be,

Never do you stop until your cherished home you see.

Home ! the dear old place whence all your boyish pleasures came,

Who is there so base as not to bless the sacred name ?

"When at last you enter, and are by the family met,

With kisses, smiles, embraces, sobs, you're instantly beset.

How you first appreciate this serving Uncle Sam,
Urchins in the street all cry : " O ! there's a soger man."
Meeting some old fogy friends they say : " Why, how d'ye do
"Tell us how at Western P'int they put you fellows through."
" Well," you say " it is but right that of it I should speak,
Laboring both day and night, we eat but once a week.
Then the fare at mess is such that when we get our share,
Cattle could not eat it. you can scarcely call it fair.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 91

They load us in a cannon if in ranks we do but cough,
Saying when they light the match, ' This time we'll let y>u off:

linking you're from Utah, an old lady at you sings,
' Were you badly wounded at the fight at Eutaw Springs ? ' '
Ladies make large parties, each an invitation sends,
You're engaged to twenty-seven when the summer ends,
Just before you leave, the twenty-seven round you close,
Begging for a lock of hair, a button off your clothes.
What a fright ! ! ! you've yielded to the charming twenty-seven,
Buttonless your coat, no hair between your head and heaven.
Coat is ruined, buttons gone no matter, let it pass,
Never were there women seen with such supplies of brat*.*.
Furlough now is nearly gone, and back you lake your way,
Feeling that to melancholy you've become a prey.
Furlough time is soon forgot, that life of wild romance,
Though often do you feel for missing pockets in your pants.
Painting now you undertake, although in fifty cases
Your instructor asks you why you will paint female faces.
When you ask what paints to use, with countenance growing sadder,
Though he sees you now are mad, he tells you to get raac/'Ar.
You give your brush a dab in any color you can find,
Destroying both your piece of painting, and your peace of mind.
Now you find astronomy included in your course,
Though it's of the greatest use, of trouble it's the source.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Here you learn a thousand things unknown in the past,

Thought the Earth went slowly round, but now you find it's fast.

Though there 're mountains in the rnoon, of trees there's not a mark,

Save when dogs look at it, when we often notice bark.

Soon, alas ! you feel within you all your former dread,

"When you're told that with your sabre you must cut a head.

Others cut at those on posts, that fall without a groan,

You who scorn such artifice would rather cut your own.

Making once a mighty cut, you pay for it quite dear,

Horse and you both tumble down, though holding by his ear.

When you rise you find that this is rather a bad throw,
Limping from the hall to the hospital you must go.
Though such hospital-iiy you hate, you have to try it,
Saying you can't live it through, they tell you, you must diet.
Here you stay till muster day, with many others clustered,
Matrons, stewards, attendants, like your blisters, then are mustered
Soon you're out, for wounds like these cannot your ardor damp,
Then we find you entering the famous First Class Camp.
Last encampment ! what a sound ! there's magic in the word !
But you're now so dignified, rejoicing were absurd.
You've become a creature who must henceforth be a star,
Not approached by common men, but gazed at from afar.
Knowledge vast is in your brain, you know what " enfilade " is,
How to get ten " lates " a day, and and how to please the ladies.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

First Class Camp, that trying time ! you scarcely would believe it,
He's indeed a lucky man who unengaged can leave it.
Soon you're smitten with a face, for you now comes the rub,
How you wish a month before, you'd joined the " Bachelor Club."
Graceful form, coquettish smiles, she cannot help exposing,
Do not think I mean to joke by saying she's imposing.
She swears by all the gods of love she'll smile on none but you,
Says all this in innocence, which in-no-sense is true.
Soon she leaves; with tearful eyes, you see her to the carriage,
Looking in the Herald two weeks after, there's her marriage.
Finally the camp breaks up ; you say farewell to tents,
Leaving such a dwelling-house, no soldier e'er repents.

Barrack life again commenced, you exercise your skill,
In finding out the surest means your fellow men to kill.
Treat ;i f<>n humanely, you are told, though try to beat,
If to treat he should refuse, you never must re-treat.
"What a sight, from stooping over desks, you now present !
You, who once was so erect, are now on study />/*/.
Soon a longing for excitement in your bosom dwells,
Think you'd like to " run it," so you take a trip to " Spell's."
You suppose there's little danger, that the road is clear,
Till vou meet an officer ; there's then some cause for fear.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

He seizes you, you lose all power, and stand fixed to the ground,

He asks you what you're doing there, you tell him you're Spell-bound.

Home you go, for on this subject no more hints you need,

Punishment you know will follow closely on the deed.

Anxious thoughts are soon dispelled, and then you change your tune,

Thinking only of the fact " You'll graduate in June."

You get measured for your clothes, a bran new uniform,

Three times a day you try it on evening, noon, and morn.

You get a regulation hat, a sabre, too, and belt,

The hat you find is like the want of beauty in it -felt.

One regret you deeply feel, you still have no moustache,

Thoug'h on your upper lip you've used most every kind of trash.

Some friends pronounced tricopherous, the best they ever saw,

You seize upon it, like a drowning man upon a straw.

The last three months seem like a year, how slowly time does fly !
You find it only April, when it ought to be July.
June, at last, arrives, which is to end your labors here,
You're to get a " parchment," of all things to you most dear.

J *

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The Board will rise 'midst banners, flags, and your diplomas hand ye,
With " Hail Columbia," " Auld Lang Syne," and " Yankee Doodle

Dandy."

Joy intoxicates you, all your sorrows now have fled,
Scarcely do you know if you are on your heels or head.

e day arrives which has so often many happy made,
When you put on your " fixings," to attend your last parade.
How proud you feel when marching to the " Sergeant Dashing
White,"

turning on your " Winding Way," you're prouder still that night.
You say to all your friends from whom yourself you now must tear,
If of your home they come within two miles, they must stop there.
A parting word, a warm embrace you give to each classmate,
And bid the Point a long farewell a happy GRADUATE.

THE CADET'S BABY.

am a military man, not a private in the ranks, but
an officer these many years. I have seen service in
Florida, in Mexico, on the borders, and I bear of
"honorable scars' 7 a few.

I was just seventeen, a cadet at West Point, I
was on my way home for the first time within three
years.

Kurly in the morning I took my seat in the cars from
New York to Boston. I wore my uniform, and (I may
own up now) was not so unconscious or indifferent as I
seemed, to the many admiring glances young ladies be-
stowed upon it, and the embryonic Colonel or General
within. Toward the middle of the forenoon, an Irish-
woman got into the cars. They were crowded, and she,

96 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

not having the respect for the military which others had
shown, took what was almost the only unoccupied seat,
and by my side. I am, or was, a Democrat. The woman
was well clad and clean, so I kept my place. In her
arms she held a child a young baby of some six or eight
months. It was a plump, lovely, happy little thing. I
had a very unmanly and unselfish weakness for babies
and children, and it was so long since I had been so near
to either, that I petted and noticed this little creature con-
siderably. At noon the train stopped for fifteen minutes.
Most of the passengers got out. I meant to have the
novelty of a six o'clock dinner in Boston, so I did not stir
from my seat. Seeing that I did not, the woman begged
to know if I would hold her baby for a few moments
while she got out. I assented. She put the child in my
arms and vanished.

The minutes passed away ; one by one the passengers
returned ; presently, when the bell rung, a crowd came
with a rush to resume their places; the locomotive started;
we were off ; and where, oh ! horror of horrors ! where
was that woman ? My hair began to rise, and the sweat
to start from ever pore. Still I waited, hoping that the
woman would finally come to assume her responsibility.

A quarter of an hour elapsed, everybody was quietly
seated, and still I held that child. People began to stare;
young ladies to titter. I felt myself as red as a lobster.
The conductor passed through, I stopped him. With a
shaking finger, I pointed to the burden in my arms, and
stammered out something about the mother having been
left behind.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

'*' What the d !" he exclaimed, as his eye fell on
the child. " Well, you're in for it, and no mistake. I
saw that woman, after she got out, streaking it like mad
away from the depot, but I thought she had her young
one with her. YouVe nicely took in and done for, that's
a fact." "But what's to be done with the child?" I
asked. " Don't know, I am sure. How far are you
going?" "To Boston, to-night." "Then I guess you'll
have to carry it as far as there. Then you can take it to
one of the hospitals, or asylums, where they attend to this
sort of business, and leave it. Perhaps some of these
ladies will help you to take care of it till we get to
Boston ;" and the conductor passed on. As he went for-
ward, evidently he told the story, for heads began to
turn, and then men and boys came sauntering in from
the other cars to see the fellow that had the baby left
with him.

Plenty of jokes were cracked at my expense, for every
now and then I heard a regular guffaw, and some such
phrase as u Precious green, eh !" " Such a go !" " Looks
fatherly !" etc.

I was in a rage. My blood boiled furiously. One
minute I wanted to swear, the next to kiek every person
and thing in the car. I suppose in my passion I gave
the poor little thing in my arms a grip, for she uttered a
quick, little cry. She stopped in a moment, and I looked
at her. She lay in my arms, so innocent and helpless,
fair an<l white, and looked up at me with such complacent
placidity, that, somehow, I felt my anger dying out, in
of me, and my embarrassment too. "I may as

98 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

well be a man, as such a contemptible sneak," I thought.
" I was an ineffable greeny to get saddled in this way,
to be sure, but that's my fault, and not this poor little
pusseyX aD d I may as well brave it through. As for
these confounded fools, just let them laugh, that's all."

So I settled myself coolly to the care of my baby.
People after a while grew accustomed to see her in my
arms, and most of the afternoon she slept soundly. But,
oh ! how heavy she grew. I seemed to have a leaden
weight tugging heavier and heavier upon me. How on
earth do women lug about children, day after day, in the
way they, do ? For me, I'm certain I would rather mow,
though I never tried it. However, to my story. Toward
dark the baby waked, and waked fretful, and hungry, I
suppose. She began to cry a long, despairing, entirely
uncompromising cry. People began to look again, curi-
ous to see what master nurse would do. I tried every
possible means to pacify the child ; my watch, my eagle
buttons, held it up to the window, I dandled it. I nearly
turned it up side down ; no use. Baby properly despised
my miserable efforts to make it forget its needed, and
rightful consolation, and cried louder and louder, till at
last I seemed to hold nothing in my arms but an immense
squall. A man could stand it no longer, let alone a cadet,
and I rose desperately from my seat, determined to appeal
to some lady or woman for assistance. As I passed
through the car, some of the young ladies broke into their
senseless titters again, the older ones looked out of the
windows, and the men eyed me with a knowing sort of
leer, that, had not my arms been occupied, they would have

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

ha<l a hit straight out from the shoulder. One motherly
person, whom I approached hopingly, transfixed me with
a stony, virtuous sort of a glare, that made me shake ill
my shoes, as if I had committed the unpardonable offence.
I gave up iu despair, and was about to return to my seat,
when a gentleman at the extreme end of the car beckoned
me forward. It was a little family party the gentleman,
his wife, and a colored girl with them, who held their
babe in her arms. The gentleman and wife were both
young, and evidently Southerners. " We heard about
this baby from the conductor/' said the gentleman as I
i near. " My wife has been fidgeting ever since it
began to cry. Can we do anything for you ? " The lady
leaned past him. "Will you let me look at your baby,
sir, a moment! " she asked in, it seemed to me then, the
s\v<-etest tones I ever heard.

She held out her arms ; I laid the baby in them.
" Such a young child and so pretty, too ! How it cries !
What is the matter with it?" u I don't know, madam,
unless it is hungry," I answered. " It has had nothing to
eat since that woman got out this morning. I don't know
what to do with it ! " Poor little love ! " exclaimed the
lady, " what a shame no wonder it cries."

She hesitated, glanced at her own baby in her servant's

amis. and then at her husband. Then, blushing like any

. tin* sweet mother laid my baby on her bosom

beneath her shawl, and Inislie I its cries as if it had been

her own of her very ilesh a:id blood. Her husband

smiled, and leaning forward as if to protect her from the

v_> of others, made room for me on the seat with their

100 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

nurse. I explained the affair to him, told him my name,
and found that my family was not unknown to him. As
we talked I saw that his wife, listening, examined the
dress of the child on her lap, felt of its texture, and
finally unclasped some chains that held up its sleeves. A
little miniature was set in the clasp of each. She looked
at them, then she said :

' I am convinced, sir, that the woman who abandoned
this child to your care is not its mother. In the first
place, no mother could do such a thing ; then, this baby's
clothing is of the most exquisite make and quality, and
in these sleeve-chains are two miniatures. See, one a
gentleman with epaulets ; the other, a beautiful woman,
evidently a lady. Depend upon it, the child is a stolen
one, or came into her hands by some unfair means.
What can be done ? "

" Do not be troubled, madam, about the fate of this
child. After the possibility, or probability, you have sug-
gested, I shall not leave it in Boston. I will take it to
my mother, and advertise the case. If its parents are
found I shall be glad ; and if not, I think my mother will
care for the rest. " Only,' 7 I added, "I wish the meeting
were safely over. 77

The lady's eyes sparkled through tears. " I can't tell
you," she said, "how what you have done, and are doing,
seems to me ; but I think you too noble to dread any-
thing. I will answer for the mother who has such a

son!'

" Softly, softly, if you please,'' expostulated her laugh-
ing husband ; " don't be quite oblivious of the fact that I
exist."

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 101

14 She turned to him with a look that must have
silenced the veriest grumbler in the world. AVe reached
Boston, took a carriage together, and only at the hotel
entrance did my new friend bid me adieu.

" God bless you !' ? said the beautiful, noble woman, as
she gave me back my baby. I should have knelt, and
kissed the hand of such a princess, but my arms and I
were then so awkward at baby tending, that nothing
seemed a possible accomplishment at one and the same
time. The clerk glanced suspiciously at me and my
burden. u We are full, sir ; not a room to be had. 7 ' I
sent for the proprietor, and again my name vouched for
me. AVhat a blessing it is to have a family in the land!
"But where in the world, Mr. Edward/' he demanded,
"did you get that child?" I told the story. He shook
his head, but said nothing.

I sent for a chambermaid to come to my room. I
begged of her to take care of the child during the night.
At first she would listen to nothing. I put my hand in
my pocket ; I gave her a ridiculously large bribe, but I
was young and green. She took the child. " But shmv.
an' ye're not the young gentleman that 'ud be after
laving yer baby! Holy Vargin ! my character 'ud be
ruined intirely, intiivly."

I assured her of the rectitude of my intentions, and
-eut her oft'; but she was at my door in the morning
before 1 had left my bed, and nothing would induce her
to keep her charge another instant. I took the stage for
my country home. The driver recogni/,ed the lad he had
driven so often over the same road.. " How you've

102 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

grown, to be sure, Mr. Edward ! Your folks won't know
you, I'm thinking, 'specially with that baby in your arms.
Seems to me, you're getting to be a family man a little
too early."

I laughed, and took my seat ; but as we began to near
my home, I grew terribly nervous and cowardly. The
house stood back some distance from the road, and as 1
walked up from the gate, I saw the whole family gathered
on the piazza to welcome me. I think I should rather
have walked up to the cannon's mouth. My sister started
down the steps to meet me, then stopped. I stepped up
on the piazza. My mother, pale as death, sunk into her
chair. My pretty cousin Ella, on whom I had always,
from round-jacket days, been sweet in a sneaking sort of
a way, darted an annihilating glance at me, and ran to
support my mother. My father advanced : " What do
you dare to bring here, you shameless young rascal ? Is
this a place He broke down, so angry, that utter-

ance was absolutely impossible. At any other time I
should have shouted with laughter at the ludicrous spec-
tacle he presented ; now I only hastened to tell my story.
In a few moments my mother's arms were around me, my
sister and cousin were contesting a Taari for possession of
my baby, and my father recovered from his rage suffi-
ciently to welcome his only son, though I did hear him
growl through his white beard *' Confounded spoony!"

I advertised far and wide to no purpose. But my baby
grew so into the affections of all the household that I had
no other steps to take. We named her Perdida, and I
left her with my mother. When I returned two years

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 103

after, on graduating, I found her grown heavier and pret-
tier, and she manifested great affection for me, charmingly
legitimate, for was she not "my baby? 7 ' As such I cher-
ished her. She was six years old when at last I left W
Point for active service.

After that I led a wandering and adventurous life for
years, "by flood and field.' 7 "My baby " wrote meat
first often. Her first letters were curious specimens-
halt' written, half printed, and sometimes her meaning
eked out with rude drawings. In those days she was
charmingly personal. "I do so and so I think so and
so I love so and so. 77 But years changed her caligraphy,
and, alas, the feelings of her letters. Now, in her charm-
ing girlish characters, stood : l ' Your mother does so and
so,' 7 or "your sister thinks, and loves, 77 etc. My mother
wrote :

11 We can't call Perdida * your baby 7 any longer. She
does not permit the title, and you, were you to see her,
could scarcely imagine that our fair young queen was ever
a baby. I am too old to be enthusiastic, but our darling
is surely the loveliest vision these eyes have ever rested
on. She makes hearts ache, but as yet their pain is vain.
We tried to be so cautious, but she has somehow learned
about her finding, and it is bitter knowledge to the proud
little heart. It may be that that makes her melt only
toward us. Will you never come home to see us ? Will
you never come home to see us and her ? 77

It was in the spring of the year 1856. I was on my
way home to America. An elderly gentleman, who had
evidently been a soldier, occupied the state-room next to

104 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

mine. A similarity of taste and feeling brought us much
together during the voyage. He had been absent from
the country many years.

" When I left it," said he to me, " I meant never to
revisit the shores that had been accursed to me. I lost
there my wife and child under the cruelest circumstances,
and 1 could not remain. I thought, then, I could never
see again the spot that had been so fatal to me. And yet,
I return now, impelled by some feeling which I can neither
account for nor resist. I dream that I am going to see
my child ; sometimes, even in waking moments, I am fully
convinced that I shall find her."

"How?" I interrupted, in spite of myself. " Is not
your child dead ? "

"Alas! I do not know."

11 You do not know. Did she not die before you left
America ? "

No. Three months ago I should have said I wished
she had, rather than live lost to me, exposed to fates I
shudder to think of. Now, I am more hopeful more
trustful. It seems to me she has been kept pure, and
that I shall know her. And yet," and he sighed heavily,
" I haven't the shadow of a reason for such hope and
trust,"

I was excited I compared the remembrance of the
miniature on " my baby's " sleeve-chain with the figure
before me. I made him explain all. He told me of the
child's birth, the delicate health of his wife afterward', his
taking her to Cuba, leaving the child in, as he supposed,
trusty care, the death of his wife in Havana, and while he

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 105

was still in the first anguish of her loss, news from his
child's nurse of its death, and of her speedy return to
Ireland. He came to New York, too late to find her, and
left America at once, as he supposed for ever. In Europe,
years afterward, he had met a servant who had been with
him during his brief married life, and who declared to him
positively that his child was not dead at the date on which
the woman had written him ; but further than that he
could not say, as he had followed the fortunes of another
master.

The unhappy father sought vainly for the woman, and
now returned, as a last means, to America. He described
the child's nurse. It was the woman who had abandoned
her child in my arms, and the face before me was the
changed, aged one of Perdida's miniature. Not many
days thereafter I returned to my friend his so early lost
child, and gave up "my baby' 1 to her rightful father.
Without a pang ? Yes. Did I console myself with the
pretty cousin aforementioned ? She hadn't had patience
to wait, that I might do so ; a husband, and several olive
branches, precluded that. How, then ? I saw " my baby "
a stately, radiantly beautiful woman. She called me
Major - , she treated me in the most precise and
formal way the utmost favor she bestowed upon me, was
the .slightest possible touch of the fingers as she bade me
good-night, or good-morning, and I saw her hourly in her
idolizing father's arms, lavishing the tenderest caresses
upon him. Would I have it otherwise? No. There was
a dearer delight in the way she treated me ; the faintest
Hush that colored her cheek when I was near her, or

106 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

addressed her, had for me an inexpressible sweetness that
I wouldn't have bartered for aught on earth short of what
I eventually obtained. What ! you don't mean that you,
a scarred old veteran, of between thirty and forty,
dared? Didn't I! Hum! And this was the way of it.
In my military capacity I was invited to West Point. I
went, and my friend and his daughter accompanied me.

I sat beside her in the cars. The happy old gentleman,
at a little distance, reading diligently. I said :

14 Perdida, you have travelled this route before with
me ; do you recall the scenery at all ? " She blushed
scarlet, and looked at me beseechingly. I went on : " To
think what a heavy, hungry, unpacifiable baby I carried
on that day, and the way that poor cadet's humanity was
ridiculed ! "

The tears started, and the young lady at my side bowed
her haughty head. " And the worst feature in the case is,
that he has never had any suitable recompense A good
deed is its own reward, to a certain degree, of course ;
but in this case every feeling of my soul, every fibre of
my heart, demands something more. Perdida ! my dar-
ling, these seventeen years I have lost you to your father
but I cannot bear it. Be generous. Here, here where I
found ' my baby, 7 give, oh ! give her back to me !

She raised her head.

" If she were as much trouble now as then ! "

" My darling, 'don't trifle ! Am I to have you? "

My young lady answered not. Instead, she occu
herself with deliberately drawing off her glove. Then she
turned to me :

i sue

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

107

"Since you will be troubled/' and she laid her small
white hand in mine. Mine again.

Shortly after, we were married. I carried Perdida, dur-
ing our wedding tour, to the friends I had found for her and
myself in the cars seventeen years before ; and this time
right reverently I kissed the gracious hand that had then

sweetly tended what was now become my earthly all.

SHOULDER-STRAPS.

Pray tell me, mamma, what the shoulder-straps mean,
That on the blue-coats of our officers gleam,
You know they're so different, now why should it be,
That not even the uniform buttons agree ?
I've noticed, for instance, a blank, and a bar,
Two bars, leaves of silver, of gold, and a star,
Two stars, and an eagle, now what may it menn,
On scarlet, or orange, light blue, or dark green ? "

" Now, listen, my daughter, and pray take heed,
For the income and straps of a beau are agreed;
You may dance with a leaf, and flirt with a bar,
But reserve your best smile for the eagle and star,
And remember the fence with nothing within,
Is the field of the stripling, whose spurs are to win ;
A poor Secoml Lieutenant, perchance still in debt,
For the clothes he wore out as a West Point Cadet."

" And if on the field, a bar should appear,
Your prudence, my darling, should lead you to fear;
For if left a lone widow, the pension's so small,
Your gloves and fir at mourning would swallow it all.
And e'en with your Captain, who flourishes two,
Don't prefer the gay Line to the Staff's sober blue;

108 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

For the difference per month, in the matter of pay,
Not to mention the forage quite wiles one away.

" Next in order are leaves, but here you reverse
Each value metallic in prose and in verse;
For though gold be a Major, the silvery hue
Marks the Lieutenant-Colonel, on scarlet or blue.
Then, over the forest, and 'neath the bright stars,
Soars the eagle the lord of the leaves and the bars;
Besides, 'tis suggestive of eagles that fly,
When the wife of the Colonel her bonnets would buy.

" Above all, my darling, still honor the star,

Though it shines 'neath a silver-head, better by far
To catch some old General, than make him afraid,
And you won't be the first to command a brigade."
" I've heard you, dear mother, and thought it all o'er,
My heart's with the lover who went to the war;
You know the poor boy has not even a bar,
But I'd rather be his than the bride of a star! "

REMINISCENCES OF AN OLD GRADUATE.

NATURE S SENTINELS.

* * * Break-neck Hill, Bull Hill, Butler Hill, and
Cro 7 Nest brood in silent quaternion over the peaceful
Hudson, as if in some mnemonic reverie of those Titans
whose giant strength clave asunder their native union "in
the olden time before." During this dream of the ages, a
scanty investiture of scrub-trees has mellowed the shades
on their shaggy breasts, and the dark lichens in hardy
legions have encamped o'er the bald rocks, blackening

TVEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 109

their primal feldspathic blush into the similitude of rude,
unshaven monarchs.

cannot but feel an involuntary pity for
the new cadet, who is just landing at the old wharf, where
a sentinel is waiting to conduct him to the Adjutant's
office, there to record his entrance on he knows not
what small and great tribulations.

The poor fellow has just left the endearments of home,
and, by a rapid transition, has now become a stranger
among the mighty hills. But worst of all, instead of
receiving kindly hospitality, he becomes, for a time, one
of an inferior caste, towards whom, too often, the finger of
derision is pointed, and over whom the Fourth Class drill-
master flourishes, with too snobbish zeal, his new-born
authority. Once, too, he was deemed a fair subject for
all kinds of practical jokes, often coarse and witless, which
disgusting heathenism, Heaven be praised ! is passing away,
being more and more under ban, and is now, I believe,
laudably loathed as ungentlemanly by the cadets them-
selves.

Then, too. to be called a " conditional thing/' a "thing,"
and a " Plebe/' in slow promotion ; to be crowded five in
a room, with the floor and a blanket for abed ; to be twice
or thrice a day squad-drilled in " eyes right, " and "left
face/' in " forward march/' and in the intricate achievement
of" about face;'' to be drummed up, and drummed to meals,
and drummed to bed, all with arithmetic for chief diversion ;
this is, indeed, a severe ordeal for a young man who is not

110 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

blessed with good nature and good sense ; but with these
excellent endowments it soon and smoothly glides on into
a harmless memory. People are found who contest that
West Point is a hot-bed of aristocracy, where caste and
titles rule. It would be pleasing to exhibit to such an one
the ununiformed new class, presenting a line of about one
hundred young men of all types, at least in externals.
Side by side are seen the flabby Kentucky jean and the
substantial home-spun the ancient long-tailed, high-
collared coat of the farmer's boy, and the exquisite fit of
the fashionable Xew York tailor. The hands used to work
dangle in contact with the unsoiled fingers of a diplomat's
son, or of the petted scion of an " F. F. V."
* * * * We have known two Presidents' sons, two
proteges of G-eneral Jackson, several sons of Secretaries,
and other high functionaries, found deficient for the simple
reason that they were deficient; and we have known heads
of classes exalted ab aratro, simply for their superior merits.
Before us lies a little volume, by a Vermont farmer's son,
who successfully competed for the headship of his class
with a talented son of Henry Clay.

HE DONS THE CADET.

v,^

After three or four weeks of squad-drills, and
the safe passage of his preliminary examination, the
11 thing " becomes a full-pledged u Pie be," and assumes the
cadet uniform. Happy day ! on which he sheds the
motley badge of his rude probation, and when the last
black coat vanished from the daily marches of the grey
battalion that <; fiery mass of living valor, rolling on to

'-BOOK.

! " Cadet grey is a peculiar fabric, well known in the
realm of dry goods, and its color is such a felicitous aver-
ige of the be-sullying contingencies of real life, that it
icver shows dirt, even when threadbare. Excellent solu-
tion of a mighty problem ! Long may it remain untainted
>y innovating zeal, and may the bell-buttoned brevity of
the cadet's coat-tail never cast shorter shadows!

The calculus of variations has of late been freely applied
to the army uniform, Proteus acting as tailor-general.
Hence we say, with feeling and emphasis, " Esto perpetua !"
of cadet grey, bell-shaped buttons, black cord, white drill-
ing, and all. But, alas ! for head-gear, if genius has no
better inspiration in reserve ! For full-dress, the cadet
Qrst wore a cumbrous scale-decked, bell-crowned hat ; then
the leathern-top, fire-bucket hat, with woollen pompon.
For undress, the two-lobcd, leathern-bellows cap pre-
vailed ; then the leathern-top cap, with the duck-bill visor;
and then the present chasseur cap of cloth.

THE ENCAMPMENT.

Between the 20th and 25th of June comes
the annual marching into camp, this being pitched on the
north-eastern portion of the plain. The examination
being ended, the First Class having graduated, the old
Third Class having gone on furlough, and all the classes
having been duly promoted, then comes the flitting.
Orders are published at parade to pitch the tents, and
march into camp at a stated hour, vacating all the bar-
rack-rooms, which orders provoke such a stampede of
tables, buckets, chairs, trunks, mattresses, etc., to the

112 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

now vacant recitation-rooms, that a first of May in
Gotham is comparatively tame. In Congressional phrase,
the " wasp-waisted vampires " in committee of caryatides,
crown their heads with tables, and, sighing for unattain-
able wheelbarrows, work on with such vigor, that in two
or three hours the barracks contain only iron bedsteads,
and accoutrements hanging on the gun-racks. Before
breakfast, the camp-ground is laid out, and the tents
erected by the quickest diligence of their future occu-
pants. At the indicated hour, the signal sounds, the
companies are formed and marched into the parade-
ground, when the battalion, with the band playing, and
colors unfurled, marches to its new home. The encamp-
ment consists of eight rows of tents, two to each com-
pany, opening on four streets, or company grounds ; and
a broad avenue runs down the centre of the camp. The
tents of the Company Officers, and of the Instructors of
Tactics, are pitched opposite their respective companies,
and the Commandant's marquee is placed at the foot of
the broad avenue. The guard- tents, six in number, are
at the opposite end of the camp. A chain of six sentinels
surrounds the camp-ground, day and night. The guard
consists of three reliefs, which walk post in turn, through
the twenty-four hours, for which each guard is detailed.
This detail is drawn as equitably as possible from the four
companies, and guard duty recurs once in from two to
four days, making it really quite hard work for those not
inured to it. That direful sound of the Corporal, pound-
ing on the tent-floors with the butt of his musket, and
bawling " Turn out! Second relief !" tears most frightful

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

rents in the blessed garment of sleep, which settles down
so gently on the poor, weary Plebe, while he dreams of
home and mother. On waking to the hard reality, he
rubs his eyes, snatches his musket, adjusts his cartridge-
box, and quickly takes his place among the six martyrs.
When the relief is duly marshalled, it is marched by the
Corporal around the line of posts, each sentinel challeng-
ing the long-looked for delegation with a fierce " Who
comes there ?" as though he thought them horse-marines
at least. The Corporal responds, "Relief! 77 Once more
the martial sentinel cries, "Halt, relief! Advance Cor-
poral with the countersign !" which cabalistic word being
demanded, the Corporal advances, and whispers it over
the sentinel's bayonet-point ; whereupon he so rises in
the sentinel's estimation, that the latter quickly yields his
post, and falls in at the rear of the relief. This round
completed, the six patriots seek the solace of the tent-
floor, stoutly hoping that the officer-in-charge will keep
his distance, and not require a turn-out of the guard for
moonlight inspection. Walking post promotes medita-
tion. To pace " Xo. 5 " on a bright moonlight night,
when shadows mottle the distant mountain slopes, and
seem to sleep under the crumbling ruins of old Fort
Clinton, when steamboats are rippling the glowing
waters of the placid Hudson below, and locomotives arc
dashing wildly along the railroad across the river, when
the white tents glow softly, and the quiet stars shine
tremblingly ; there is in all this enough to stir up what-
ever tender memories, high purposes, ambitious longings,
and refined sensibilities may dwell in the sentinel's

114 WEST POINT SCHAP-BOOK.

deepest nature. Or when a sultry day has rounded to a
close, and the storm-spirit' has piled up his black cloud
fleeces in the highland gorge, and on the crest of Cro'
Nest, when the rush of battle comes, and the glowing
lightning fitfully reveals the snowy tents, wildly flapping
in tho rushing blast, as if terror-stricken at the deep roll-
ing thunders, and the quick alternations of vivid light
and solid darkness ; scarce can the soul of the sentry be
so dead as not then to be moved and awed before sub-
limity so transcendent.

To be roused by such storms from sleep under a tent ;
to see the very threads of canvas flash into view, when
the burning lightnings leap through the air above ; and
to fancy the electric arrow speeding to the bayonet points
of the muskets standing at his head ; this is among the
cadet's magnificent experiences, and quite compensates
for a wet blanket, or a deluged locker.

THE RETURN TO BARRACKS.

* * * About the 28th of August the encampment
is wont to be broken up, and the corps return to barracks.
An illumination of the camp usually takes place on the
evening before it is broken up, and the convolutions of the
11 stag-dance " are exhibited in the parade-ground with a
fervor and vivacity outdoing an Indian war-dance. This
curious cross between the shuffle and the quadrille is a
frequent evening diversion of the Cadet Camp. It is per-
formed by twenty or more cadets who gyrate among rows
of candles stuck along the ground, cadencing their move-

SCRAP-BOOK.

ents by the low, inutlled rattle of a drum, presenting a
cry pandemonium-like picture. In the olden time the
ractice was for the corps to leave West Point during the
miner season, and make long marches into the adjoin-
g States ; but this usage has long since been relin-
quished, .some say to save money, but others declare
that the cadets were too prone to make merry and run
riot during this periodical enlargement ; perhaps both are
right. The scene presented during the striking of tents
is quite lively and picturesque. In the early hours of the
day all private property of the cadets (their blankets,
clothing, etc.) is carried by them to the rooms assigned
them in the barracks, leaving in camp only their muskets
an< I full dress. At the fixed hour "the general beats,"
and all fly to their tents, awaiting three taps on the large
drum. At the first tap, all except the corner tent-cords
are cast loose, and the pegs withdrawn ; at the second,
the corner-cords and pegs are loosed, and the tent
gathered m to the tent-poles, which are hoisted out and
so steadied, that at the third tap, all the tents instantly go
down in concert; imd woe to any " unlucky Joe " who
fails to complete the prostration at the moment. The
lents arc folded and piled; the companies are formed,
and. taking their stacked arms, are marched to the parade ;
the Commandant then marches the battalion back to the
barracks, and the encampment is no more.

116 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

SCRAP FROM THE SECTION-ROOM.

Looking back among the section-room recollections, we
are fain to smile when we remember that' day when
" Smithers," who wasn't heavy in Law, was asked " when
the writ of ' habeas corpus ' was suspended in action ? " and
replied, convulsing the crowd, that "it was when the man
was dead ! !

RETURN OF THE FURLOUGH CLASS OF 1850.

There's a stir in " Camp Gaines ;" all observers may see

'Tis a moment of interest, a moment of glee,

Each cadet is awake, every tent is unmanned,

They pace to and fro, or they anxiously stand.

Some object thrice welcome they seem to await,

As all eyes turned eagerly to the " South Gate."

The forbidden " South Gate," where cadets are denied
The privilege of exit, when on the inside ;
In flaming black characters, always are seen,
The words " Shut the gate !" but none to " come in."
On the other, in ghastly white letters appear
The four horrid syllables " No smoking here !"
Oh ! answer, ye classes ! What may ye await ?
"What pleasure approaches thro' the " South Gate ?"

The " Furloughs " are coming, and now must be near,

There is dust, there is shouting, the " Furloughs " are here.

They are here ! What a cheer! as their comrades they hail;

At the sight, what delight, and affection prevail.

How rush they ! how yell they ! with arms intertwined,

To be pressed to each breast, that breast true and kind,

To be greeted by comrades, escorted in state,

Then haste ye' and gaze toward the distant " South Gate."

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 117

Te true men, alas ! Ye are " Furloughs " no more,
"\Vhcn that portal admits, but opes not to the corps,
And who deem this the happiest day of their lives;
"Alexander," "Wright," "Bonaparte," " Musical Ives,"
" Rose," "Casey," "Smith," "Sheridan," " Morgan," "VanVoast,"
Each now Second-class men, all hail to your post !
May your duties be followed with ardor as great,
As you felt when so gaily you passed the " South Gate."

We welcome you back to the camp, and the plain,

Where your favorite " Glitz" will drill you again;

Oh ! blessed among students, you now may renounce

All fears of being wasted by much "cherry bounce,"

Cigars, late hours, or unwholesome rich food,

While your minds shall with flesh be daily imbued;

May you ever be happy, at each turn of fate,

As when you "blithe Furloughmen" passed the "South Gate."

MY FIRST NIGHT ON POST.

y "Regular."

Tt was in the summer of 1850 that I entered " Camp
Gaines " with the Battalion of Cadets. Many, to whom
this kind of life was new, will remember how disagree-
able were the first two weeks of our encampment, when
the rain fell almost incessantly, rendering guard-duty
unusually fatiguing, while the had weather allowed tl,
off guard an immunity from the minor duties of the camp.

The " Plebes " having been in the battalion but a lew
days, were not well enough disciplined to be detailed for
guard, so that the burden of it fell upon the First and
Third ela-ses ; no wonder, then, that every expedient was

118

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

used to avoid it. I was a " Plebe " then, and having
exhibited a tolerable degree of proficiency in the " Manual/ 1 '
one of the First-class men, now an artillery officer , obtained
permission for me to walk in his place. One beautiful
morning, after donning my patron's uniform, which fitted
me more like a bag than a tight well-made suit, I took
my place in " C " Company's detail, and with a boyish
feeling of pride, at being the first plebe on guard, swelling

THE ENCAMPMENT

in iny bosom, was marched to the parade ground where
the guard was forming. After the guard was brought to a
"rear-open-order," the Adjutant commenced his inspec-
tion. By the time he came to me I was exceedingly ner-
vous, for all sorts of strange stories about severity exer-
cised towards new cadets, were making me curse memory
for bringing them up at such a time, to arouse unneces-
sary fears about my dress and accoutrements not being in
the most perfect order. But after inspecting my gun, and

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

finding it bright and clean, lie cast a glance at the uni-
form I wore, and pushing my chin-strap down lower, said
kindly, "Very well r sir," and passed on without a word
of censure. Then after the band had ''beaten oil'," *e
were inarched in review before the eyes of the fair ones,
who were thronging around the guard tents. I will pass
over the occurrences of the day, and come at once to the
evening's u entertainment,' 7 as my comrades call it. :

It was nearly eleven o'clock at night when I found
myself walking up and down a little patch near the tents,
better known as tl No. 6."

I had been walking during the day, and, wearied with
the heat, I almost welcomed a heavy shower of rain which
soon drove me to seek shelter in the " sentry-box,*'
whence I could c.itch glimpses of the scenery, as the fre-
(ju-nt flashes of lightning played 'over it. It was a bad
night for a " green hand " to be on guard, for the war of
the storm and the worse than total darkness made it
almost impossible to detect the approach of any one
who might feel disposed to ll devil me."

Whenever a transient (lash lit up the camp with spec-
tral light ; I would throw a hurried glance around me. and
then draw my cape over my face to keep out the rain,
whirl i beat full in my retreat. During a momentary lull
of the storm, footsteps were heard approaching my post,
from the camp. I challenged, "Who goes there V " \o
answer, but before I could call out again, a huire tjnt-
peg came rattling into the sentry-box. I rushed out,
disliking sueh tar^et-praetiee. and. running up the path,

icceeded in stopping one of the jokers just as he was

succeeded

120 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

crossing it ; but instead of retreating, he began to expos-
tulate with me, and wound up a lengthy harangue on the
impropriety of " Plebes " interfering with "old cadets/ 7
by attempting to seize my gun. I called out, 1 1 Corporal
of the Guard, No. 6!" and I could hear the words run
from post to post as the sentinels caught the cry. But it
was of no use, for my opponent yelled, " Never mind the
Corporal ! " and this, the blockheads' on the intermediate
posts repeated as lustily as the other. Succeeding in
getting away from my opponent, I was backing off to give
him the benefit of the cold steel, when I suddenly fell
backward into a wheelbarrow, which a jovial Third-class-
man pushed against me, and after running a rod or two
with me, he gave it a jerk, tumbling wheelbarrow, musket,
and myself into the mud together. That wheelbarrow
played a conspicuous part in that night's amusement, for
every few minutes it would 'come rattling down the path
towards me, in a very supernatural manner, apparently
without the aid of human hands. Here was a fix ! Full
a dozen men, regardless of the weather, were practically
" devilling " me.

The rain seemed to pour, more than anything else, and
my white pants clung damply, but affectionately, to my
limbs. The Corporal of the Guard was perfectly oblivious
of my situation ; and above all, there was an absolute
necessity for endurance until the relief should come.

I entreated the jokers, in the name of humanity, to let
me alone, and clear out. To add to my discomfiture, the
occupants of a neighboring tent, aroused by the noise,
raised their tent-walls, and lighting their pipes, coolly

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 121

njoyed the fun, occasionally throwing out a hint when-
ever the game seemed to lag. One moment my torment-
ors would assemble in a body, and marching up under the
I command of a " six-footer/ 7 would answer my challenge
as a " body of armed men."
Then, they would pretend to be the relief, and march-
ing up in perfect order, would be quite astonished (?)
when I charged them with the bayonet. As I was con-
tending with two cadets, who wished, as they said, to carry
a sick tent-mate across my post to the hospital, the sick
man showed surprising agility in attempting to lasso me
with a tent-cord. At last, one by one, they dropped off
to their warm beds, and left me perambulating in the mud,
all the time suspecting this to be a new ruse, in order to
play a new trick. As if to confirm my suspicions, a tall
fellow came suddenly upon my post;, as I was entering the
sentry-box ; I lowered my bayonet, and was about to run
him through, when his cool " steady ! " caused me to re-
cognize in him the officer of the day.

After giving the countersign, he asked me my orders,
and then praising me for being so vigilant, passed on,
leaving me once more alone with the storm. Before long,
the relief came around, and, posting another man in my
place, took me to the guard-tents for a little rest.

A little after three o'clock in the morning, the loud
"Turn out ! second relief! " aroused me from the blank
in which it seemed I had scarcely slept a moment.

AVith a sickening, overpowering sense of fatigue and
exhaustion, I "fell in" with the rest, and passed around
ciunp until I reached my post, where I was to walk two

122 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

hours more in the mud. Oh ! how slowly, time dragged
away ! It seemed as if morning would never come ! More
than once I was asleep while walking, and would bring up
suddenly against a tree or sentry-box. I remember one
time I was awakened by feeling on my face the wet can-
vas of a tent which I had run against during my sleep,
although several yards from my post.

It had ceased raining by this time, and heavy clouds
were passing swiftly over head, while between them the
rich moonlight poured down upon the white tents, the
ruined breast-works of Fort Clinton, and the silvery Hud-
son, seen between the waving cypress trees.

The hills forming the eastern bank stretched away to
the south, in a kind of silvery haze, darkened in places by
low, black clouds, whose bases seemed to touch the river,
and mingle with the rippling waves.

Soon the grey light of morning spread over the horizon,
and when the sun rose, the morning quite welcomed it,
and as the smoke rolled slowly leeward, reveille rang out
on the fresh air in sweet harmony with the beauty of the
glorious scene, which recompensed me for the troubles of
" my first night on post."

THE OLD ACADEMY.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

123

THE RETURNED FURLOUGHMAN.

iwake, until midnight the " Furloughman " lay,

While the "blues" in a host, beset his sad mind ;
And thoughts, busy thoughts from West Point flew away
To the home of the loved ones, he'd left far behind.

He thought of the many sweet joys he had tasted,

In the short summer months he had spent at his home,

"While memory blamed him for moments then wasted,
Till fast to his eyelids the scalding tears came.

"Weary nature at length yields herself to the sway
Of sweet sleep, and his cares are at last left behind,

As watch-worn and weary his grief fades away,
And visions of happiness dance o'er his mind.

He dreams that from studies and troubles away,

Again he hath gleefully started to roam,
While the bright sun of June warms his path with its ray,

And the voices of loved ones now welcome him home.

He hastens with rapture, to reach the bright spot,
Where often in life's sunny morn he hath^ported;

His eyes beam still brighter, beholding the cot
Of the maiden he truly and fondly hath courted.

Ho inwardly vows that he will never return

To West Point, that region of trouble and sorrow,

Where the " midnight oil" doth so frequently burn,
While "boning" the tasks that are set for the morrow.

He quickens his pace, as he nears the abode
Of the being who to his foiid heart is so dear;

He bounds o'er the lawn, ho so often hath trod,
When the pale silver moon in summer shone clear.

124 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

He approaclieth the threshold, and raiseth his hand,
A tap at the door, he gently hath given;

Oh ! what is that sound, booming deep o'er the land,
And loudly re-echoing back from the Heavens !

'Tis the reveille gun ! see, his sweet dreams have fled,
And duty, stern duty, now calls him away,

Saying: " Up, thou dull sleeper, and make up thy bed,
" And prepare for the arduous toils of the day ! "

Oh ! Furloughman, where are thy dreams of delight ?

The places the loved ones that thou wert so near?
"Where now are the scenes that gladdened thy sight ?

Oh ! where is the voice thou wert listening to hear ?

Alas ! they are there in that far Southern clime,
"Where thou wert on furlough so happy and free;

But, oh, look ahead, there will yet come a time,
When again the home of thy childhood thoul't see.

A PAKODY ON HOHENLINDEN.

At W 7 est Point, when the sun was low,
All spotless lay the untrodden snow,
And dark as winter was the flow

Of Hudson rolling rapidly.

But West Point saw another sight,
Loud groans were heard at dead of night,
And " Plebeians " howled with wild affright,

Whilst dreaming of Geometry.

'Twas morn, but on that luckless day
The morning brought no cheering ray
To pierce the mists of Algebra,

Or clear it of perplexity.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 125

In glittering armor, bright arrayed,
Each teacher drew liis battle blade,
And furious each Plebeian made,

To witness such pomposity.

Then shook the hills with thunder riven,
As each " Plebe " to the black-board driven,
Despairing of all hopes of Heaven,

In view of his deficiency.

And fainter still his hopes shall grow,
When he receives a " cold zero,"
His throbbing bosom rent with woe,

Big tears come rolling rapidly.

The section falters ! on ! ye brave !

"Who rush to glory or the grave.

Wave ! Plebeians ! all thy banners wave !

And charge with thy Geography.

The lesson's o'er the hovering cloud
Has burst in torrents, wild and loud,
And buried in one common shroud,

The essence of stupidity.

Many shall part, no more to meet,

For " Math " has been their winding sheet,

And every " hash " they now shall eat,

Brings curses to their memory.

AN OLD CADET'S ADVICE.

Come, fellows, and list to instruction,
Which hereafter may answer you well ;

Perhaps it may stay your destruction
By the dangerous arts of a belle.

126 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

> The ladies Heaven bless their fair faces I

Come here in summer time sweet,
Each one is loaded with graces,
And all have cadets at their feet.

They smile on the gallant young " grey,"

Accept all of his offers to walk,
And he, not knowing what to say,

Allows her to sustain all the talk.
Then it's " Oh ! I so love the Army,

With it's bugles, and drums beating loud,
And if one should ever ask for me,

As an officer's wife I'd be proud."

" I should like to partake of his honor,

For ever stay close by his knees,
And read him nice stories from ' Bonner,'

When he might lay sick with disease.
I should so love a life on the prairie,

If my husband should ever there go,
And would never complain to him nary

That such life was uncommonly slow."

" If we ever should become adjusted,

At a station where parties are rife,
I should never appear much disgusted,

Should he ask for a dance with his wife.
I would never once flirt with another,

Not once cause my husband to swear,
I would never once write to my mother,

That he was a brute, and a bear.

" But, alas ! there's no officer sought me,
I fear that I never shall wed;

For rather than have citizens 'round me,
I declare I would die an old maid."

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The cadet feels silent and moody,
His heart it is thumping with pain,

He thinks of the three years of study.
Before his commission he'll gain.

He thinks with despair of his fate,

His youth appears saddened and drear;
To ask such an angel to wait,

Fills his bosom with doubt and with fear.
She starts, and with tears in her eyes,

^Vhich causes his fond heart to ache,
She asks for a " button," and sighs,

" I'd prize it so much for your sake."

With a sob like a twenty-four pounder,

He tears one from over his heart,
And gives it with bows much profounder

Than a dancer could ever impart.
In fact, the poor fellow is captured,

His sleep is oft broken and short,
He dreams himself wholly enraptured,

"While the lady is only in sport.

"With others he's very retired,

But his love remains constant and true,
And he goes to bed pretty well tired,

"When his drills, and hers, are all through.
One evening, the moon shining brightly,

He calls on her at the hotel;
And then with his heart beating lightly,

Commences his story to telL

He tells her he knew but to love her,

And has dreamt of her often of late;

Perhaps she will say he may have her,

As he has only thw yarn to wait.

127

128 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

She hears him a moment, through pity,
And then hopes his heart he will mend;

She's engaged to a man in the city,
But she'll always remember her friend.

He leaves her with feelings of sorrow,

At being so foully deceived,
But he goes to the drill on the morrow,

With his feelings greatly relieved.
He takes no more walks on " Flirtation,"

His slumbers are broken no more,
He has found a divine consolation,

And is now a most staunch " Bachelor."

FURLOUGH SONG OF 1859.

Oh ! Furlough men have gone before,
For half a century or more,
But never went a class so fine,
As that which goes in '59.

Oh ! gay and bright, the sunbeams dance
Upon the vine-clad hills of France.
"Where blushing maidens make the wine
For Furlough men of '59.

Oh ! bright are stars, and midnight skies,
But brighter far are women's eyes,
And brighter, softer, yet they shine
On Furlough men of '59.

A large moustache we each will raise,
WV11 strike the " Cumes " with amaze,
They'll rub their beardless chins, you know,
And wonder why their hairs don't grow.

'-BOOK. 129

At home, we'll never think at all,
Of " reveille " or " Surgeon's call;"
At nine or ten o'clock about,
AVc'll call the boy to " pull us out."

We'll tell the " cits." some famous lies,
And make them stare in mute surprise;
If they our words in question call,
AVe'll swallow them, hot*, boots, and all.

Some winter's night, when wars the gale,
Shall children list their grandsire's tale,
And hear amazed, the deeds in fine,
Performed by us in '59.

A CITIZEN'S IDEA OF D.KESS PARADE.

Vrhaps the most pleasing sight at the "Point," is the
evening dress parade. It is five o'clock, and the sun is
gently sinking behind the blue Highlands, when the
drums at the barracks commence their evening call.
Xow from the sally-port, cadets attired in full military
panoply saunter forth, and lounge in the vicinity of their
respective companies ; now the drums 11am once more,
and almost coineidently a long row of " grey-coats " stand

latues still and motionless at "carry arms."
The spruce orderly calls the roll. Each man as he
answers ''Here," comes to an " order." They are then
formed in two ranks, and wait for the band to play them
to the parade. The band now, in obedience to the wave
of the baton of the Drum-Major, beats the 'Adjutant's
'all; "and that functionary, attended by his "markers,"

130 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOJt

and the Sergeant-Major, marches out to make the align-
ment.

Now the captains assume the command ; and while
from the band there comes a gush of music, the four
companies march to their destination. Each company in
its turn is aligned by its captain ; and the whole line is
dressed by the Adjutant. They thon come with a crash
to an " order ; ;; and the band, after three preliminary

THE PARADE.

strains, " beats off" down the front behind a gaudily
dressed gentleman with a muff on his head, and a red
pudding-bag hanging out of the top of it. In his hand
he carries a tasselled cane of a large size, which he wields
as easily as a child would a straw. On arriving at the
end of his journey he turns about, and boring a hole in
the centre of the band with his magical baton, he disap-
pears from view in the bowels thereof. Soon he emerges,

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

red and pompous as ever ; and the band, by some mys-
sterious movement known only to itself, apparently mix
up in inextricable confusion in endeavoring to follow their
leader. But now they come in as regular order as before,
and march back to their starting point. Arriving there,
they play a psalni tune, then give three strains more, and
at the final one the evening gun is fired, the Stars and
Stripes flutter to the ground, and the cadets are called to
" attention " by the Adjutant. The battalion is now
brought to a "rear open order % ; " the Adjutant walks
stiffly down the front, files to the right in a manner shock-
ingly abrupt, faces to the battalion, and sings out "Sent
harms ! " An instantaneous clash, and every cadet
private regards with speculative eyes his polished gun-
barrel. The Adjutant then faces about, and tells the
" Officer in Charge " that the battalion is now at his service.
This dignitary waves his hand ; and, as he draws forth
his trusty blade, the Adjutant, marches to the left and
rear of him. The " Officer in Charge " now braces his
sword close to his shoulder, grinds his heels together, and
vociferates "Crec hump!" and the cadets one more
" carry arms" ""with automaton-like precision. The
officer again yells "charge peanuts!" and every private
faces half to the right, and repels an imaginary
foe, " Cree hump!'' and they resume their former
position ; " Der hump! " and they come to an "ord

C3 " Officer in Charge " sheathes his sword, the
erlies report, and the Adjutant reads the orders
I/"/////' 'Gbdmy, 'S Point, 'en York. >/'///
nth, ''unl 6vVy-Fn.fi; .' ' SJtal 'lordcr* Dumber T\VO!!!"

132 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

etc. Finally the cadet officers march in a line to the
" Officer in Charge," shake their fists in his face, and cut
away with great precipitation, on his retaliating in a like
manner.

The companies, who thus far have been regarding the
above proceedings with stolid indifference, now "carry
arms," and are marched off at "double time" by the
orderly sergeants, the band disappears over the hill, and
the spectators withdraw, no doubt highly edified with
what they have seen, but especially with what they have
heard.

THE ABMY BLUE.

(Old Version.)

A few days more, a few days more

To toilsome study given,
A few days more we'll reach that shore

For which we long have striven.
"With pipe and song, we'll jog along,

Till these few days are through,
And all among our jovial throng

Have donned the Army Blue.

A few days more, a few days more

To " bone," parade, and drill,
And then we'll go our winding way,

Our duties to fulfil.
When " Mordecai" we've laid on high,

"Wayland," " Mahan," "Theroux,"
We'll turn our eyes to brighter skies,

And don the Army Blue.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

A fc\v days more, a few days more,

And Jordan will be passed,
We'll get o'er on another shore,

By striving hard and fast.
Then leaving here without a fear

Arising to our view,

give a cheer ! 'twere good to hear!

And don the Army Blue.

REVEILLE.

Hark ! the morning gun is sounding

Faintly on the drowsy ear,
O'er the plain the noise is bounding,

Reveille is drawing near.
Drum and fife awake the echoes,

Sounding far o'er hill and lea,
Nearer yet, and louder growing,

Awake! arise! 'Tis Reveille !

'Tis the hour of peaceful slumber,

Ere the morning sunlight beams,
of brightness, forms of beauty

Float through all the sleeper's dreams.
'Tis the hour when happy visions

Bring the days of Furlough near,
Voice of home, and friends seem calling

In melodious tones and clear.

" Don't you stop to dream of Furlough !

Tumble out on hand and knee !
Kick your bedding ! seize your clothing !

Rise ! and run ! 'Tis Reveille !

134 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Don't stop to wash ! Don't stop to button !

Do not swear or curse your fate !
Put it ! leg it ! dust it ! streak it !

Leave your shirt, or get a ' late ' ! "

Jumping, rushing down the stairway,

Tumbling headlong, down you go !
Rapidly the ranks are forming

In the area far below.
See your comrades far before you,

Through the entry door- way squeeze ;
Heavens and earth ! the drums are stopping,

Now the dying echoes cease.

RECOLLECTIONS OF THE RIDING HALL.

" If ye have tears, prepare to shed them now."

The greater part of last year, while my class were learn-
ing to ride, I was confined to the hospital by sickness, and
accordingly deprived of the advantages they were enjoy-
ing.

Still, having been occasionally on horseback, I thought
I should escape making any remarkable display of defi-
ciency in that branch of our profession.

When I commenced riding at West Point, it was a very
different matter from what goes by the same name else-
where.

Without stirrups, without often even a saddle, we were
mounted on ungainly brutes, and trotted around until life
was nearly extinct. W^hen I came back from tl Furlough,",
my class had ridden nearly a year, while I had ridden only
a week or two. Nothing daunted, however, and trusting

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

135

to fortune and my own powers, I buckled on a pair of
rusty spurs, found myself securely fastened to an enor-
mous sabre, with an iron scabbard, and sallied forth.

Dragoon brought me in a raw-boned, vicious-looking
animal, which, after some preliminary difficulties, I suc-
ceeded in mounting. " Trot! " Horse started ; so did I,
half off my saddle. ' I had never been taught to keep my
heels " well out;" accordingly my spurs "went in ; r horse

VIE\V FROM BATTERY KNOX.

went in, too! Peculiar motion! Began to suspect I was
losing my balance : sabre flew out, and hit the horse on
the head ; in plunged my spurs deep among his ribs ;
another jump ; sabre flew back and hit him on the flank ;
spurs worked convulsively among his bones ; jump !
thump ! spur.! horse reared; seized his mane ! Horse
ivaiv<l up, caught his ears, and saved myself. It began to
grow exciting. Finally, horse started off; such a race ! !
Pulling on his mane had no tendency to check his wild

136 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

career ; rather seemed to irritate him ; had a good hold
with the spurs, but did not consider myself safe. Sabre
flew up and hit me in the face; blind for a moment ; heard
something drop; looked up on the saddle, and found I
was not there ! Concluded that it must have been me
that dropped. Horse standing near, wagging his tail,
with a quiet twinkle in his eye, adding insult to injury !

All this time imagine the riding-master shouting :
" Where are you going ? " "Keep in ranks, sir ! " "Keep
your spurs out of your horse ! " " Mr. B ! for -'s
sake take your hands off his ears!" interlarding his re-
marks with an occasional expletive verging on the pro-
fane. Mounted once more, and, with the exception of the
throwing, the previous performance was repeated an incal-
culable number of times, until, at the expiration of the
hour, bruised, battered, and blinded, the ride was ended.

The next day I was reported for "spurring my horse
cruelly!'' "'Inattention'!" "Not keeping in ranks!"
" Not starting off' at the command ! " u Not holding reins
properly," etc., etc. For each of these reports I received
the appropriate number of "demerit," and corresponding
" extras." Went to my room and wrote an impassioned
eulogy on the pleasures of pedestrianism, headed with the
appropriate, motto, "Walk up hill, and foot it down ! "

Since that day I have fallen down three flights of stairs,
from stumbling over my sabre ; been kicked by my horse,
and incapacitated from performing military duty for six
weeks.

WEST POINT SCR.

137

ODE TO C. M. W.

Respectfully dedicated to Lieut. C. M. W., formerly of the U. S. Army, who was
in the Corps for the strange propensity of entering a cadet's room unex-
lly, by means of a pair of rubbers, and "hiving" thereby, in many cases,
contraband pipes, and other unauthorized articles.

AIR " They stole my child away."
I had a "meerschaum" in my drawer secreted,

A pipe I cherished with the fondest care ;
No other pipe in all the Corps could beat it,
It's gentle fragrance seemed to charm the air.

CHORUS.

f I hear the old rascal upon the stairs;
I In spite of his rubbers, I hear him there.
He stole ! he stole !
He stole my pipe away !

Oh ! how I cursed when anybody took it ;

I used to scrape and clean it every day.
One night when I took up my pipe to smoke it,

Old " Cadmus " came and " hived " my pipe away.

CHORUS (as before.)

A pack of cards, my sole remaining riches,

Since " Cadmus " " hived " my precious pipe away,

Lay hidden in the leg of my old breeches,
"\Vliich in the alcove hung from day to day.

CHORUS.

r hen evening's shadows gently closed around us,
We used to take the "papers" out to play;
Till " Cadmus" came one fatal night and "hived" us,
He " skinned " us all, and took our cards away.

CHORUS.

['ve nothing left since " Billy's " last inspection,
MY pip.- has gone, my cards have "followed suit,"

Ami long before their loss I ceased deploring,

He stole my " boots, and blacking-brush to boot! "

CHORUS.

138 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

EXTKACT.

* * * " O'er the battalion like a tent,
Cloudy-ribbed, the sunset bent,
Purple-curtained, fringed with gold,
Looped in many a wind-swung fold ;
While for music came the play
Of West Point's glorious orchestra."

" MERCOOK."

Written by a Cadet, who was "visiting without permission," and seeing the
Inspecting Officer approach, started to run, but when half way up stairs, slipped
and fell, and not rising soon enough, was ''hived," and punished by being made
to walk "aix extra tours of guard duty."

The shades of night were falling fast,
As 'long the portico there passed,
A heavy step that, echoing 'round,
Betokened by its heavy sound

" Mercook."

A rash cadet, too fond of friends,
Strains every nerve, each sinew bends,
To reach his room, if still he can,
Before that hated, dreaded man

"Mercook."

In happy rooms, he saw the light
Of fragrant pipes gleam warm and bright,
While from below there came a sound
Of some one falling, and " confound

Mercook ! "

He caught his toe within a crack,
That stretched him out upon his back;
And e're he had the time to rise,
There stood before his frightened eyes

" Mercook ! "

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

On Saturdays the poor youth walks,
And sadly to himself he talks,
Could you but hear him self addressing,
You'd know he's certainly not blessing

"Her cook."

139

DREAMS OF THE DRAWING ACADEMY.

Marched we to the Drawing-room,

In misery landed ;
Blessed we our several eyes,

Blessings left-handed.

Soon were we seated there,

Drawings before us ;
Saw we the form of " Bob,"

Hovering o'er us.

Slowly my pencil trace 1

Archway and column
Of an old monastery,

Cheerless and solemn.

Close by the portals dark,

Sat a monk hoary ;
Read of the works of God,

And of his glory.

But my fond fancy passed

New scenes before me,
Joy such as memory lends,

Softly stole o'er me.

Where the old convent stood,

Rose a church spire ;
Loud chimed the marriage bells,

Low sang the choir.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

"Where the old monk had read,

Knelt a fair maiden ;
Bent was her graceful head,

With beauty laden.

Sighed I, "Wilt thou be mine?

Ne'er more to sever ? "
Fondly she whispered' " Thine,

Thine, thine for ever ! "
* * *

Heard I the step of " Weir,"

Vanished the vision ;
Heard the gruff " darker here,"

Smiled in derision.

Felt I an icy calm,

Bound rny heart gather ;
Muttered I faintly, "damn ;"

Wished he was further.

Loudly the tower clock tolled,

Quickly I started ;
My eyes to heaven rolled ;

Sighed and departed.

"DO NOT FILL A SOLDIER'S GRAVE."

A poetaster, who appears to appreciate matters and things in the connubial
way, with classic zest, sends us the following :

Ever since the hour we met,

You've been mirrored in my heart ;
Oh ! my darling ! my cadet !

I from thee can never part.

SCRAP-BOOK.

Mirrored as the waving trees,
In the bright and placid stream,

On whose banks amidst the leaves,
Thinking, love, of thee, I dream.

Long we wandered by the river,
Grassy banks, huge rocks above,

Sylvan beauties to discover,
Dells propitious to our love.

Glimpses of the river's brightness,
Whilst we whispered murmuring vows,

Twinkled now with joyous lightness,
Then obscured by prudent boughs.

Little thought I, getting married

"Would a classic love impart;
But through hope of bliss miscarried,

I know " Horace ;> now by heart.

I found his soft and waving locks
"Were nothing but a new-made wig.

How could I sustain such shocks?
How be merry as a " Grigg ?"

I resolved at once to leave,

No more to meet can he and I;

Could the foolish nmii believe
I'd be nurse to his small "Fry ?"

Both pride and fortune I'll forget,
Pleased to be thy willing slave;

"With tender love thy vows are i
But oh ! don't fill a soldier's grave !

142 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

MOLECULES.

"Oh ! science, noble science !" sang the bard,

In days of yore, before " Bart's Phil." was known.
Alas ! poor fool ! he never knew how hard

" Bart's Molecules" are, or he'd have changed his tune ;
And " Molecules," cursed " Molecules," 'd have been his theme,

From day to night, from sunny morn to eve,
And direst curses then his lips would teem,

"I bone, I bone, but blamed if I believe."

"DAKKEK HEBE!"

My lights and shades were coming fast,
And the next touch would be the last,
"When o'er me bent that frosted head,
And loud those guttural accents said

" Darker here ! "

"Good Heavens ! " I cried, " 'tis dark as pitch ! "

I saw those iron muscles twitch,

And that mouth cavernous opened wide,

And those deep clarion tones replied

" Darker here !

"Well, I'll be hanged ! " 'twas all I said,
For echoed still that voice of dread,
And high above my mutterings rung,
The accents of that well-known tongue

" Darker here ! "

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

"PHIL."

Thus sung a Second Class man " Gay"
His sad and un impassioned lay,
As ho sat '' boning " hard one day

Early in the morn:
CHORUS.

This horrid stuff I ne'er can get,
I can but learn thee and forget,
Furlough! I love thee yet;

Would I were home.

And as he sat yet half in doubt,
He hoard a merry jovial shout,
That seemed like " Second Class, turn out ! "
Resounding through the hall.
CHORUS.
This horrid stuff, etc.

And as his book he threw away,

lit- smiled, and knew that he could say,

H would not "fess," at least that day,

And thus he gaily sung:
CHORUS.

This horrid stuff I ne'er can get,
I can but learn thee and forget,
Furlough! I love thee yet;

Would I were home !

" A SLIGHT TRANSPOSITION."

Pope $fl//x ;

' Nature and Nature's laws were lost in night;
1 said ' let Newton be,' and all was light."

A puz - in'in /v//w/-x :

iture jind Nature's laws were clear and bright;
Then came 'Bart's Phil,' and all again was night."

144

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

AN EVENING'S REVERIE.

The wintry winds moan solemnly through the mountain
gorge, singing their evening dirge. The earth is mantled
in its robe of white. The busy hum of toil and labor is
hushed, and nature seems to be moaning for the depart-
ing year.

DREAM OF FURLOUGH.

The trees, now bare and leafless, wail solemnly, as
shaken by the winds. The flocks which, but a few weeks
ago, were browsing on yon mountain slopes, have now

ne^

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

ed for refuge. The earth seems deserted and * * *
nuscript blurred) * * * But care we for winter's
sadness? Come, boys, let's haste to our rooms, and

oke and talk of our coming furlough. The rude winds
are piercing; but come, we'll defy them, and seek comfort
and pleasure in the rich fragrance of Virginia's weed.
Up, up, we go; now we are at last at the end of the jour-
icy. Open the door, and we are at home. Off with your

ercoats, for the register's more genial air renders them
unnecessary. Out with the beds, and sit down wherever
you can. Now the pipes are brought forth, and soon the
thick volumes of smoke form dense clouds above your

ad. The present and the past are forgotten, and we
think only of the future. Yes, of the future, with its
labors and toils, its joys and its pleasures, its sorrows

d its cares. But we look only for its pleasures, and

::ish from our minds all thoughts of its troubles and

res.

We think of furlough ! of furlough ; that oasis in the
lonely desert of cadet life, that comes to cheer us in our
weary journey, with its bright dreams of happiness,
ow we are silent, occupied each with his thoughts ; but
n the silence is broken, and we again are talking of our
homes. What a flush to the countenance does this word
bring ! How the eye sparkles, and the lips tremble at the
thoughts of the dear ones at home! How eager each to
express his hopes and joys at once more seeing them !
But amid this joyous and excited group there is a sad

Iimtenance. Look at him as he seems to be drinking in,
t almost unwilling to hear, our bright anticipations of

146 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

the future. Has the thought of home and friends no joy
for him ? Ah ! yes, they have, but there is a loved form,
now cold and silent, that will not cheer his return. Death,
in his desolating course, has left his sad footstep upon
their threshold.

A tear trickles down his cheek, and for a while we are
again silent.

Bright visions are flitting across our minds, mingled
perhaps with sadness, which mars their brightness, but
our exuberant spirits soon throw off such sad reflections,
and we tread together the mazy labyrinths of the future.
We think of the dear ones far away, who cheered us at
our departing, and remember some little token of our
earlier days. Oh ! how sweet are these recollections, and
though there are sad remembrances to affiliate themselves
with our bright ones, yet we strive to forget them in the
lovely prospect of the time to come.

But now the bugle blows, and each must away to his
quarters. One by one, they depart, leaving me alone
with my thoughts to dream of coming pleasures. My
room is filled with smoke, in whose fleecy clouds seem to
be pictured my dreams. In the distance is the dear old
homestead ; near me are seen father, mother, sister,
brother ; and, nearer still, a lovely face thrills the heart,
and mantles the cheek with a glow of pleasure. I am
with them once more, clasped to hearts kind, loving, and
true. Again at home, surrounded by friends, every desire
anticipated, every wish gratified. How tenderly are the
heart's chords wrung by these recollections !

The loving smile of a mother, the recollections of i;he

POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

old village schoolmaster, or of the companions of our
childhood ; of the care bestowed upon us by some faithful
Id servant ; or perhaps it is but of the old house-dog,
that barked at night in the fields, or of the nightingale
that returned every year to build its nest, and rear its
young, in the stately old oak, under whose huge branches
we were once wont to play; it is all a dream, but, oh !
how near the reality.

Hark ! there's a noise of footsteps upon the stairs ! It's
the inspecting officer ! Open the door ! down with the
window, for the room is full of smoke ; but before you
have time to move, there is a slight tap at the door, and
it immediately opens. A grim smile lights up his coun-
tenance, and you feel that all is lost.

Muttering that dread sentence, " Tobacco-smoke in your
uarters, sir," he closes the door, leaving you once more
o your reverie.

I am again dreaming ; the ghostly visions of three
aturday " Extras " ^talk before my enraptured sight, and
Math.," too, with spectral gaze, stares me full in the

Murmuring, u poco en el suelo, mucho en el cielo," I take
up my pipe to soothe my sorrows, but it is out, and I am
left alone to curse my luck, and dream of my misfortune.

148 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

ON THE SUBJECT OF BREAKS.

(In commemoration of the breaking of four Orderly Sergeants and a Sergeant-
Major, in January, 1859.)

Come all ye broken officers, and let us sing a song,
About the loss of chevrons which to us did belong;
A grand proceeding of the man who doth for glory pant,
It emanated from the mind of our brave Commandant.

By Mexican experience, obtained when stealing corn,

He thinks surrender needful for the best troops ever born.

Four mouths he let a class off guard, then thought it wouldn't do,

For " Floyd " would hear of it, and make him sure surrender, too.

The Secretary he might bribe; but he couldn't raise a "V,"
He'd spent all on the man who wrote his works of infantry.
He sent for half his sergeants, anger over his face stole,
Himself he then resolved into a " committee on the whole."

His four Instructors, when they met, all gave a quiet smile,

And thought that soldiers might engage in work somewhat less vile.

The Colonel being rather late, the four sat still and mum,

Sang " Willie, you are welcome," when at last they saw him come.

Running in, he puffed and blew like forty-five balloons,
Said he was late from dressing his (imaginary) wounds.
Dyspepsia, too, he mentioned; the best thing he ever saw,
Disease, so happy in results, it kept him from Utah.

He moved his hand, and took a seat, and winked his blood-shot

eyes,

Declared that we had failed to do our duty as his spies;
Said, each one of us he'd break, and make some one above him,
Feared from what he'd seen of late, we did no longer love him.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. HO

These facts disturbed him many nights, he tossed about in bed,

For he's a man of tender heart, and still more tender head.

"What he should do, he asked his mind; that great mind could'nt

tell;
s usual in such cases, he spoke then to old " Dell."

e started with his Orderly, with papers, pens, and books,
ttention stood in front of " Dell.", put on his sourest looks.

He told him what we'd done, and more some things the most
absurd,

But "Dell." knew already there's no reliance on his word.

He talked to " Dell," gesticulated, and struck the table blows,
The papers shoved 'twas no hard ivork beneath the General's nose.
He said he had, in confidence, his sergeant's own confessions,
Sure, he'd break them all, and used some other mild expressions.

He says, " Take this thing off my hands, I'll have to change my

tune,

There's not much time to boot-lick them from now till sixth of June.
I fear they'll call me to account; what horrid looks they gave me,
But I'll not dye my hair again, my grey hairs then will save me.

" If they had written an excuse, or called me ' General/
I should have passed the matter by; but now I never shall.
Promotions, titles, honors, they've o'erlooked, and made me mad,
Forgetting that I'm a Colonel, and thinking I'm a lad.

"I've been to France, and it was there I learned to ride so well;
I've been in Mexico, also, but that won't do to tell.
I've been in clothes bags, chimneys, too, that every one regrets,
But never have seen any men compare with these cadets."

On making all the chevrons fly, we found the " Supe. " was bent,
Sufficient crimes the Colonel gave to hang a regiment;
"Dell." thought that taking chevrons would incn -UM- the Col.'s gain,
The gold to be obtained from them might buy a set of brains.

150 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

But the unkindest cut of all was in the reprimand,

It separated classmates who once formed a friendly band;

Of knowledge vast we've robbed them, and they take it very hard,

They scarcely know the duties of a private of the guard.

We've thought of getting up a present for our brave Col. often,
And all agree the fittest thing for him would be a coffin;
Many think we ought to try him with a hempen cord,
To see if he'll give up the ghost as he gave up the sword.

All who have listened to the song, or if it heard a word,
Must slip up to the Commandant and tell him every word;
You thus can gain his confidence, he'll pat you on the head,
And promise you a monument to spread your praise when dead.

THE YOUNG DRAGOON.

(AiB Gay and Happy.}

Gay is the life of the young dragoon,
Naught on earth to fear has he,

On his horse, with sabre drawn,
Devil a single care has he.

CHORUS.

So let the Staff Corps bray as they will,
We are for the cavalry still;
For the cavalry, for the cavalry,
We are for the cavalry stilL

Sent out on the frontier border,

Far from home, and those most dear,

We will go, when comes the order,
Braving danger without fear.

CHORUS.
So let the Staff Corps, etc.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

" Draw ! " it goes from rank to rank,
" Gallop ! " then is the command,

"Charge! " then comes, and by the flank,
We're together sword in hand.

CHORUS.
So let the Staff Corps, etc.

Oh ! to hear the trumpet sounding,
Pealing forth its clarion tone,

And to feel our chargers bounding,
Such are joys for us alone.

CHORUS.
So let the Staff Corps, etc.

Oh ! the gallant " Fifth " forever,
Three cheers for its Colonel brave;

Fate alone our hearts can sever,
When we sink into the grave.

CHORUS.

So let the Staff Corps bray as they will,
We are for the cavalry still;
For the cavalry, for the cavalry,
We are for the cavalry still.

151

POETKY OF CADET LIFE.

(AiE Lazy Club.

At West Point there's a soldier's school,
"Where, never mind how great the fool,
His Jirst rear's " Math." fits him to rule
His cheek, in action keeps him cool.
He's left at home a father mother

152 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

One or two sisters, and a brother;
Perhaps there still may be another
To whom his leaving gave some bother.

CHOKUS.

"With calculus, or cannon ball,
In section room or riding hall,
There's not a joy we can recall,
Like that within old " Benny's " walL

He soon forgets such foolish ties,
He's never seen with tearful eyes,
Except when in them powder flies,
And then, I fear, he " d ns his eyes/'
He don't board well his fourth-class camp,
He takes his seat as suits his rank,
And there inverts a water-tank,
For which he ne'er receives a thank.

His nights are full of pain and travel,
He's seized before he can skedaddle,
He glides through mud, and over gravel,
Until his clothes do all unravel.
Whilst walking post, he sees the bliss
Of his tormentor, with some fair Miss;
Perhaps that e'en he hears a kiss,
As it's improper " don't mention this,"

A " reckless " yearling, as you say, rash,

In summer's girt with silken sash;

He improves his winters " making hash ; "

And o'er " spooney letters " his heart doth smash.

But when at last a Furlough-man,

He soon forgets he's tasted " tan,' 1

Of all spirits, he leads the van,

Dissolving views in every can.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Whether he won't, or whether he will,
He's bound at last to get his " Phil"
There's no one here will take it ill,
If I declare " it's a bitter pill."
His first-class camp's a season of rest,
He takes to hops with a better zest.
There's not a thing his spirits to test,
Unless it is some "close arrest."

Every alternate day he rides

Ancient beasts with rotary sides,

Who, like the plays, are full of " a-sides"

And backs just made for constant slides.

At length there comes that happy June,

That soon dispels all former gloom.

He gives his " Plebe " some advice and a broom,

Let's hope his tailor will hear from him soon.

" I beg to say that there's the place
To harden the hands and bronze the face,
To train one for this eartly place,
And in the next to lose all grace."

153

DESCRIPTION OF A CADET HOP.

(By a Survivor.)

'Round* the room, 'round the room,
'Round the room onward,
Like a tee-totum
Revolved the one hundred.

For all were in order,
And no one had blundered.
Onward the bright brigade!
"All around!" Palfn-v said;
So 'round and 'round the room
Spun the one hundred.

154

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

FOUR SCENES IX A CADET WALTZ.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

'Round then the bright brigade,
No one the least dismayed
None for the ladies said
They never blundered.
Not theirs to make reply,
Not theirs to seem too shy,
Their 's but fast 'round to fly.
So 'round and 'round the room
Whirled the one hundred.

Eose all their arms so bare,
Flew all their skirts in air,
Sweeping those sitting there,
Whirling and spinning, while
Lookers-on wondered.
Trod on and swept along.
Some looking quite forlorn,
Part of their drapery shorn,
Till they have reached their chairs,
Spun the one hundred.

Gas lights to right of them !
Gas lights to left of them !

lights above them !
By glass pendants sundered.
Laughing and blushing so,

tis .-ill rushing so;
11 rated and out of breath,
And from the figure there,
Now all have reached a chair,
Save that some few are left
Of the one hundred.

Oh, that enchanting spin !
"When will the next begin?

156 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

How old folks wondered;
How can they labor so ?
Is that true pleasure, oh,
Lovely one hundred ?

THE GHOST OF POLLY H.

Oh ! 'twas a night too terrible

For language to describe;

A night when howling fiends travel

Upon Nor-Easter's side;

And spell-bound sea-gods break the spell,

That binds them 'neath the tide,

And rising from the inky swell,

Spread terror far and wide.

When every gale that sweeps the " plain,"
From North, South, East, or West,
Brings not the balm of sleep but pain
From regions of unrest.

'Twas such a restless night as this,

That on my bed I lay;

One moment's sleep were priceless bliss,

Oh ! Worlds for break of day !

" Yes, worlds I'd freely give ! " I cried,

" To see to morrow's sun; "

It seemed as if old Time had died,

As if his sands were run.

I was not like the man of old,
Who " took no note of time;"
Each loitering moment's length I told,
From weary chime to chime.

TVEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

At last worn by relentless care,
O'er me began to creep,
As if in answer to my prayer,
Half-waking, fevered sleep.

"Tis often thus upon our bed,

"With troubled dreams, and aching head,

And weary limbs, we toss ;

The rich, the poor, the young, the old,

The hag, the belle from beauty's world,

Distinctions all are lost.

And often thus, when want and care,

Have spread the mantle of despair

O'er our pleasures fleeting;

It often, too, is brought about,

Just like dyspepsia or the gout,

By frequent over-eating.

I slept at last a fever-sleep,
And dreamed a fever-dream,
I saw what I ne'er saw before,
Nor since in dreams have seen.
I was the slave of fiends from Hell,
Of every shape, and hue;
But the worst of all my enemies
Was one in Army Blue.

He sought me out at early dawn,

"Whilst weary nature slept,

And " skinned " me for my " bedding down,"

Because "I had not swept,"

Because my "bowl was not upturned,"

For "dirt in fire-place;"

Then with his horny finger, on

My mantel tried to trace

157

158 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

His ugly name, and with a sneer

Said" dusty ! Mr. Case ! "

And then from out his pocket drew

His omnipresent pen,

And wrote me down a list of " skins,"

[I thought from eight to ten. J

[Demerit, twenty they would give,

Or more than that, perhaps;]

And then he started for the " mess,"

To take his morning " schnapps."

Said I, " at last I'm rid of him,"
And back to bed I crept;
But soon he sought me out again,
And " skinned " me while I slept.

And thus he always kept my path,

From early morn to night,

Until at last, I woke once more

To see the morning light.

Oh ! happy youth ! had I but seen

The morning light alone,

For there, beside the bed, I saw

A shapeless mass of bone ! !

"Which, as I gazed, took human shape,

And by my bed did stand

The grinning ghost of " Polly H ! "

Come from the spirit-land !

I knew him by the cynic smile,

And pencil in his hand.

He spoke no words his whining tones

Had vanished like a cloud;

His noble form was wrapt up in

A " cotton factory " shroud ;

His mantle, floating gracefully
Upon the morning air,

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Disclosed his hoofs divided hoofs,

And slender ancles bare.

I thought I would detain him there,

That he should get a "late ; "

[In his own coin, 'twould pay him off,]

And see him " skinned " by Fate.

So reaching forth, with sudden grasp,

I seized his flowing skirt,

I drew the ghost from off the chair,

And held * * * * my Furlough shirt I !

150

AN IMITATION.

Bone, bone, bone,

"NVhcn the world is merry and glad;
Bone, bone, bone,

"When the heart is weary and sad.
Laboring and toiling on,

AVinning the far reward,
Dreaming of ease in after-life,

AVith the wealth of a noble lord.

Bone, bone, bone,

Ere the purple light of morn
Vanishes night, and robes the hills

In her beautiful uniform.
Starting at reveille,

Hurrying down to the call,
Cursing the stairs that weary the limbs,

And the lightless lamps of the hall.

Guard, guard, guard,

In trimmings like glittering gold;
Guard, guard, guard,

Mounting 1 in morning's cold.

1GO WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Guarding a vacant place,
Against some fancied foe;

Walking post with a weary face,
With measured pace and slow.

Walk, walk, walk,

When the sun is glowing warm,
Walk, walk, walk,

Through wind, and rain, and storm.
Walk, walk, walk,

Ever bearing the gun ;
Wishing at noon for the shades of night,

At night, the morning sun.

Drill, drill, drill,

Over the dusty plain;
Drill, drill, drill,

Till the limbs are numb with pain.
"Pinked," if we glance to right or left,

" Pinked," if we look to the rear,
Wishing our surly Instructor in ;

Life at West Point, " ain't it queer ? "

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

"BULLY FOB ALL."

To sing a bully good song, I'll try,

Bully for me, bully for me.
Gay as they make 'em, here am I,

Bully for me, for me.
A big thing is an old cadet,

Bully for him, bully for him,
He's sure to be the ladies' pet,

Bully for him, for him.

CHORUS.
Bully, oh, bully, oh bully good song,

Bully for all, bully for all;
Join the chorus, and help us along,

Bully for all, for all."

A " Plebe " puts on his soldier's clothes,

Bully for him, bully for him,
Straightens his chin, and points his toes,

Bully for him, for him,
All day he's drilled, and marched, and flanked,

Bully for him, bully for him,
And then at night he gets well " yanked,"

Bully for him, for him.

The " Yearling " tries the reckless game,

Bully for him, bully for him,
He's fond of healing " same at same,"

Bully for him, for him.
Biit when the fatal " Sixth " comes 'round,

Bully for him, bully for him,
He's weighed in the balance, and wanting he's "found,"

Bully for him, for him

^3?

162 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The " Furlough-men," how jolly are they !

Bully for them, bully for them,
They throw their old grey clothes away,

Bully for them, for them.
If their furlough is short they take it ill,

Bully for them, bully for them,
But when they come back they have their " Phil."

Bully for them, for them.

Our "first class year," we soon pass through.

Bully for us, bully for us,
And then we don the Army Blue,

Bully for us, for us.
And when we've worn it just two years,

Bully for us, bully for us,
"We're Brigadier-Generals of Volunteers,

Bully for us, for us.

And now, cadets, my song is sung,

Bully for me, bully for me,
You know I'll fight before I run,

Bully for me, for me.
A very good health I wish to you,

Bully for me, bully for me,
If I wasn't on pledge, I'd drink it too,

Bully for me, for me.

A CADET "HASH."

On Saturday evening, a short time ago,
Three gallant cadets, both cautious and slow,
With eyes on the watch, went creeping around
A certain man's yard where chickens abound.

^RAP-BOOK.

163

They thoroughly searched through briar and brake ;
But " nary " a fowl, cock, gobbler, or drake,
Hen, gosling, or goose, except in the yard,
"Was seen by the three, which really was hard.

Especially so, as twenty or more,
Just inside the yard, and near to the door,
Were cackling aloud, and stalking around,
Or lying in heaps close by on the ground.

A CAPET HASH.

But " Grey Coats," you know, a beautiful stock

Of patient possess ; so down on a rock

They (partly sat, to wait for awhile ;

The murder would simplv Mid not "vile."

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Nor waited in vain, for just as the sun
Went down to his rest, all fiery and dun,
A gallant old cock, in majesty great,
With widely spread wings, new over the gate.

He cackled, and clucked, and crowed, with a voice
That made the cadets look up, and rejoice ;
As loudly his song rang over the plain,
To summon his wives together again.

Straight onward he came, as haughty and grand
As if he alone was ruling the land ;
Now spreading his tail, and clapping his wings,
And feeling no doubt as great as a king.

But woe unto him, that crow was his last,
For one of our friends most cruelly cast,
Direct at his crest, a ponderous stone,
And true to its aim the missile was thrown.

The laws of the art he had studied in "Phil.,"
He knew just exactly the manner to kill ;
Then wonder no more, my friends, when you hear
How fowls on the Point so oft disappear !

They rushed to the spot, and captured the prey,
And under a cape soon stowed him away ;
Then hurrying home, they thought with delight
Of the fun they'd have in barracks that night.

When night had approached, and all was now still,
They went to the woods just over the hill ;
And gathered some shavings, splinters, and sticks,
And took from the pile an armful of bricks.

The bricks were arranged in parallel rows,
The purpose is plain, of course, I suppose ;
For just in between them the fire was then made,
And over the fire the frying-pan laid.

'-BOOK.

All this you must know was done " after taps,"
When other cadets were taking their naps ;
While over the door, and window beside,
A couple of quilts securely were tied.

All over the floor, these careful adepts,
Some blankets had laid to muffle their steps ;
This having been done, as quick as they could
They struck up a fire, and kindled the. wood.

Then one of the three, who acted as cook,
Brought in an old bag, and from it he took
Some butter, and salt, black pepper, and bread,
And then the old cock, of which you have read.

How the cock was procured, you all have heard ;
The rest without leave, or license, or word,
They stole from the "mess,", or "hived," as they say,
In tumblers and cups at dinner that day.

They mixed, at once, in a general mass,
The comforts above, then hastened to pass
This butch from the wash-bowl into the pan,
And blew up the fire with " Phil." for a fan.

It simmered, and stewed, and frizzled, and fried,
Till cook had declared the boasting of pride
" T\v;is (loin: to a 'T,'" and giving a grin.
He vowed 'twas the best he ever had seen.

Ah ! there was a dream of revelry then,

>ver the "hash " these jovial men
Did stand to inhale its savory smell,
And all went smooth as a marriage bell.

But hark! there's a sound! a rap on the door!
That faintly arises from the first floor.
" Didn't you hear it ? " said one of the crew,
" Oh ! nary a hear/' said others" Did you ? "

165

166 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

" Why don't you listen ? -it is on the door ! "
And nearer this time, more loud than before !
The steps on the stair, all muffled, and slow,
Too plainly declare what's up down below.

Ah ! there was a deal of scampering then,

As rushing about, these fear-stricken men

Endeavored to hide the signs of the fry,

Or " hash" if you please from the Office* 's eye.

How vain the attempt ! for one in his fright
Knocked over the lamp, and put out the light;
And cook let the dish containing the hash,
Descend to the floor, with terrible crash.

As this had destroyed all hopes of their feast,
They thought they would save themselves at the least,
So those of the room slipped into their beds,
And gathered the covering over their heads.

The others who heard, with deepest despair,
The Officer's step, close by on the stair,
Endeavored to hide somewhere in the room,
Hoping to escape from him in the gloom.

Two, under the bed, most skilfully slid,
And fancied themselves most carefully hid,
And all of the rest, some five or six more,
Secreted themselves in rear of the door.

All this was done, much sooner the,n said,
For fearfully near, the Officer's tread
"Was heard in the hall, and all in the room,
Now still as the dead, awaited their doom.

Scarcely a moment had happened before

The Officer's hand laid open the door,

On gazing around, he saw what was wrong,

And searching the room, he " hived" the whole throng.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Nor must you suppose that this was the end,
For fellows thus "hivi-d," most commonly spend
Their Saturday nights on sentinel's post,
To pay for the fun, and " hash " they have lost.

167

" GIRT SIMMER KOOK."

A story of " Girt Simmer Kook " I will tell,

Avec son ventre si gros.
Among the fair ladies he cuts quite a swell,

Avec son ventre si gros.

Oh ! Heavens an<l Earth ! his heart, how it beats,

l>ans son ventre si gros.
When he says to the babes "kiss ''Kook' where he eats,"

Avec son ventre si gros.

>f all brave actions the noblest are his,
Avec son ventre si gros.
Ami his face, oli ! what a comical phiz !
Avoc son ventre si gros.

" Yearlings," take head ! when "Plebes" you pull out,

Sur li-nrs ventres si gros;
You'd biti-r lie low, when "Kook" is about,
son ventre si gros.

168

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

SCENE IN THE COMMANDANT'S OFFICE.

[Col. H seated at liis desk. Enter Cadet G in arrest.]

Col H. " Well, sir ! "

Cadet O. "I have been in close arrest now, sir, for over ten

days," and

Col. H. " I am not capable of considering your case, sir ! ''

Cadet G. " I didn't suppose you were, sir, I

Col- H. " Silence, sir ! Leave my office immediately ! "

Cadet G. " Certainly, sir, but- "

Col. H. " No more words, sir ! Begone ! "
[Exit G.]

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 169

DOMESTIC CALCULIia

I often think of happier days,

AYhilst sitting in my lonely room,
Of pleasant friends, with pleasant ways,

All " functions " of my early home.
"While " X," the great unknown, remained,

No change came o'er life's sunny dream;
But once the " increment " unchained,
And like Aurora, fades the scene.
" //" means, not only coming care,

But stands for happiness, you know,
And when it equals " 0," then

The "ratio's limit equals' WOE."

A SECOND MUNCHAUSEN.

(The following is a copy of a letter, written by a cadet while in the hospital, who
was Bull'crin^ from slight indisposition, and, not knowing what else to do, picked
up a catalogue of a " Female Seminary," and wrote to one of its fair inmates. He
has since "kicked the bucket'' in consequence of receiving no reply to his
efi'uions. )

CADETS' HOSPITAL,

WEST POINT, N. Y, Nov. 186-.

Miss D

You will no doubt be greatly surprised at receiving a letter from
an entire stranger, but under the truly extraordinary circumstances
which control me, I hope you will pardon such a breach of etiquette
on my part. You will see from the heading that I am at present an
inmate of the hospital, and my only regret is that I am not in a
" Lunatic Asylum," for there I could " while the fearfully weary hours
away," in watching the eccentric performances of individuals more

looney " than myself; but under the existing circumstances I have
been troubled with ennui to such an extent that I have been several

170 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

times tempted to " shuffle off this mortal coil," and thus bring my
glorious military career, with all its troubles and pains, to a speedy
termination.

As a last resort (and if this fails, the Lord pity me ! ) I thought I
would write to some one of Eve's fair daughters, and see if I could,
by some means or other, induce her to take pity on my forlorn con-
dition, and send me some words of sympathy and condolence in this
dark hour of trial and distress. ******

Some weeks ago I had the misfortune to be violently thrown from
my horse a fractious beast while endeavoring to jump a hurdle;
in which pleasant exercise we are drilled every day. The horse I
had that day was not the one I usually rode, and was one of the
most unmanageable and vicious creatures in the stables.

I was urging him on at the top of his speed, when suddenly, as he
neared the hurdle (which was eleven feet and four inches in height
by actual measurement), the brute stumbled, and pitched me over his
head with such velocity that I turned three complete somersaults in
the air, going " heftily " over the hurdle, and striking the ground with
such force that my feet were projected into the earth to the depth of
six inches, notwithstanding there had been a hard frost the night
previous.

I remained in that horrible situation for seven consecutive hours,
although my friends made the most violent efforts to pull me out.
Finding that I had become attached to the spot, instead of leaving
me alone in my last agonies, my comrades gathered around me, and
after smoking three fragrant Havanas, I mournfully whistled the
plaintive melody of " The Ratcatcher's Daughter," and bade my
brother cadets farewell. ********

Everything then became dark to me, and when I next recovered
my senses, I found myself stretched out on a hospital-bed, with the
nozzle of a pair of bellows in my mouth, and the handles in the
hands of my affectionate " chum," who had, as he afterwards told
me, been blowing away for twenty-three hours, to keep the breath
of life within me. ,1 feebly, but lovingly, winked my left eye the only
muscle I could control at him, to have him desist from his labor

POINT SCRAP-]

THE VERY SORROWFUL NARRATIVE OF FRANK
DAVENPORT.

HISTORY.

of love; but all to no purpose, and I was at last having gained
sufficient strength obliged to bite three inches off from the brass

end of the nozzle in order to attract his attention.

^
lie at last refrained, and, to my great wonder, I have been slowly,

but effectually, recovering, and I am now able to move slowly around
with a pair of crutches. Ah ! can you refuse to answer my letter
after all my troubles ! !

Smiling like a calm and placid oyster,

I am, ever of thee,

X. Y. Z.

THE T

This " poetical effusion ? was occasioned by the follow-
ing circumstances : * A cadet had answered one
of the many advertisements for correspondents that
appeared in the 11 '"''/^y, and had corresponded for some
time with the " fair one " under the nom de plume of
" Frank Davenport.''

One evening while the battalion were at supper, a tele-
gram wus received for the above-named cadet, notifying
of the demise of his u anonymous spooney."

The despatch was handed to the Commandant of the

ess-hall, who published an order to the effect that a de-
patch had been received for u Cadet Frank Davenport, <?
and it' there was any one in the corps who was corre-
sponding under this name he had better call and get it, as
i contained matters of importance. This subject created
r.o little amusement, and a cadet (who, it is needless to

J72 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

state, has since been found deficient in " Ethics ") has im-
mortalized the affair in the following lines. [The author
of the illustrations was summarily dismissed also on ac-
count of the utter lack of " lines of beauty" in the
sketches.]

As the feelings excited by this doleful tale are "mov-
ing " in the extreme, reader ! draw forth the snowy : ker-
chief ! and "if ye have tears prepare to shed them now !"

FRANK DAVENPORT.
"CANTO THE ONE TIME."

In which appears ye ''courier at '31.'"

'Twas eve. The dying sunlight threw
O'er roof and tower a sombre hue ;
And in this solemn, weird-like light
Flitted the spirits of the night.
The wind was sighing o'er the hill,
The river's surface broad was still ;
It glittered wild like naming glass,
As the old minstrel climbed the pass.

Ye courier picketh his way up from " Gee's Point"

As sore of limb, and stiff of j oint,
He wandered slowly up Gee's Point ;
His blood was curdled by the breeze
That blew chill through " Flirtation's " trees.

He cometh upon a watch-fire.

The cadet limits all are passed,
And breathes he freer now at last ;
But as the Library wall he turned,
A watch-fire close beside it burned.

WEST POINT

He is challenged by the Supt.'s " Bum."

Up sprang a warrior clad in steel,

From crown of head to tip of heel.

" Thy name ! bold ' Cit ! ' and hark ye ! stand !

"You're trespassing on Government land ! "

in / ma i<'(h himself on a brass band and singeth.

The stranger stopped, came to a " shun,"
And shivering like a guilty one,
He from his neck, where free it hung,
A brass band took, he played and sung.

THE SONG OF THE AGED MESSENGER OF WOE.
TUNE. Psalm of Life.

" Though I sing in plaintive numbers,
\\V:iry, wretched, though I seem,

Chilled, bereft of pleasant slumbers,
AVith ne'er a nap, or ne'er a dream."

He beareth sad ti<!

'Sir, you see in him before you,

T of tidings s;id;
ntury slips oVr you,
Tell me where I'll find ;i lad."

174 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

He ivisheth to find a youth.
" A young man unknown to me, sir,

Francis called, in gentle sport,
If among you lie shall be, sir,

His name is Frank Davenport."
The minstrel paused, his song was sung,

He sank upon the ground;
The brass band fell from where it hung,

The winds blew coldly 'round.

The bold "bum." pitieth ye minstrel courier.
The warrior stern, to pity moved,

Surveyed the prostrate form;
And said, as his pale face he viewed,

" He's worn out by the storm."

The " bum." bloiveth a hefty old blast.
From his broad, steel-encircled neck,

A whistle then he took,
And blew a blast so " heftily,"

The very building shook.

They lay ye prostrate courier kindly on a shutter

'Twas answered. Hurrying men appeared,
The prostrate form they bore,

On past the chapel, o'er the walk,
Up to the guard-house door.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Leave we the messenger of woe,
He's all right now, I think,

"Poetic license" will I claim,
To take a healthy drink.

175

"CANTO THE TWO TIME.

Cock-loft room Frank sitting at a table gazeth on a miniature, he
ruminateth.")

Y<- vriting in Sanscrit <f ye Student.
ATE Wild Flowers. Lucia de lam- em-wed.
"TO LADY."

" Dearest idol of my heart,

"\Vliat sweet dreams my vision fill !
Ah ! I only live for thee,

Fondly truly, love thee still."

176 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

" "When I close my weary eyes,

'Tis thy radiant form I see,
Oft in agony I weep,

Doubting, love, thy love for me.

" Wilt thou keep thy plighted troth,

Still thy love for me retain ?
Ah ! my loved one, we shall meet,

Ne'er on earth to part again."

(An inspection of the above lines will prove that had Byron lived to behold them
there had been an immediate "auto-da-fe" of the "spooney youth.")

A knock loud on the door was heard,
It opened shortly, wide;

In stalked the messenger of woe,
His brass band at his side.

N. B.-

CHANGE OF MEET-HEE.

AIR B'mgen on the Rhine.

There was looking at each other, there were floods of salty tears,

There was in the young man's mind, a host of hurrying fears.

"I'm from a distant State, from some loving friends of thine,

Who live in Indianny, near the old Kentucky line.

Your name, sir, it is Davenport, or I am much mistaken,

A message now I bear you, from the one you've ne'er forsaken:

WEST POIN'

.P-BOOK.

>n whose lonely grave the pitying moon does shine,
r uy down in Indiauny, near the old Kentucky line."

TEARS, WEEPING, WAILING, AND GNASHING OF TEETH.
\iR.Horatius at the Bridge.

The cadet's l>ro\v was sad, and the cadet's speech was low,

And darkly gazed the cadet on the area far below.

Step out, sir, with your message, I have now but little

A.s I haven't 'boned' my lesson, and that 'Phil.' it comes at 9."

THE MESSAGE OF WOE.
"Werry doloroae, accent grave."

I come from one who loved you in the happy days gone by,

A mild and radiant maiden with brightness in her eye;'
A voice with music's sweetness in its silvery loving tone,
Win- ;dly cherished the hope, she's thine alone.

.ngel now is smitten with the icy hand of death;

died me to her bedside with her feeble gasping breath,
And placed a packet for you in this aged hand of mine;
The maid's from Indiauny, near the old Kentucky line.

I charge you/ said the maiden, 'as you fear the hand of death,
-top thou for refreshment, nor stop thou to take breath,

thou to take liquor in that thirsty throat of thine,
Till thou dost this little service, this last request of mine;

I Tell him his Sally loved him till she filled an early grave;
Tell him t <,rly where Ohio's w r aters lave;

Tell him to find : replace; my thanks will e'er be thine,

Said the maid from Indiauny, near the old Kentucky line.
'Tell him, with loving hand, to bedeck my funeral mound
With those dear violets, loved of old; perchance I'll hover round,
And listen to his ln-irt sobs, as he weeps where I am laid.

I I'll pray in I [raven for him, e'er his own lov 1 H-osier maid.
Tell him I'll unseen guard him. and watch around his head,
As he marches into buttle with a firm and gallant tread.

178 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

For a moment let him linger at the little mound of mine,
Where I sleep in Indianny, near the old Kentucky line.' "

The speaker ceased, his tale was done,
But in his outstretched hand,
He held a little packet,
Tied with a silken band.

( The agitation of Francis can scasely be expressed. )
Poor Francis grasped the packet,
His breath came thick and slow,
As he oped the sad love token,
Of the days of long ago.
The contents of it simply were
A button and a ring.
If you'll believe me, gentlemen,
I've told you everything.

The ring was massive gold,
Wrought with a strange device,
One that often glittered
On a hand now cold as ice.

( The button was a bell button ! /)

The button was quite curious,
The kind that is called " bell ; "
Poor Francis sniffled over it,
For he knew it very well.

(He lamenteth her loss most emphatically.}

" The button was once bright," said he,

" And once I had a love ;

The button's tarnished now, and she

Has vamoosed up above.

Fra# token to remind me

Of the happy days I've spent

POINT sriiAi'-i;<

With Sal ! "--he clashed a tear away;
' Poor girl ! ! well, let her went ! .' "

CVNTO THE THREE TIME.

[SCENE. Frank's room, evening ; he sitteth on a chair weeping bitter tears.]

fui Music- " )> Raven."
was evening, sad and dreary ; Francis sat alone and weary,
Thinking how tin- " molecules " sported in the fable days of yore.
Suddenly there 'pping, un unearthly dismal rapping ;

Well he km ^ally rapping on the window or the door.

Well In.- knew th.v >ad call, sir,

Out , -d into the hall, sir ;

the room and alcove, careful, eager, o'er and o'er;
Suddenly he oped tin- casement, downward dived upon the basement,

Yes, upon the hard stone basement, all his brains were scati

Iow and sadly thence they bore him, cast a table cover o'er him,
Bore up him, up, sir, to his quarters, on the fourth or "cockloft"
floor.

Life in all bereft him ; on his bedding sir, they left him.

Left him breathless, cold, and icy, in this world to rise no more!

(ELI OB-ITIC M

Kind hands smoothed his place of

Within a llowery .u'lade :
Our country's banner wrapped hi>

On that his pipe was laid.

180 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The stranger wandering in the glen,

Where hushed is every sound,
"With curious eye may idly mark

The cadet's lonely mound.

If so, let silence rule the scene,

As o'er his grave you muse ;
Then bren the a prayer for him who sleeps

Beneath the lonely yews.

His epitaph was written as follows, by one who knew
and loved him, A monument was raised by " hydraulic
pressure " o'er his grave. The following was thereon en-
graved with a jack-knife by " Lan-Keys-Mith," who would
often wander to the grave of poor "Frank," smoke his
pipe, and ponder over the deep ingratitude of the Corps
of Cadets :

EPITAPH.

" Here lies a youth to fame unknown,

He never wasted time to ' bone ; '

And if in life he journeyed still,

Would by the " Board ' be 'found ' in Phil.' "

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

181

THE GROCERY MAN.

[Not original in the corps, but a great favorite during the camp of 1864.]

In Brooklyn city there used to dwell

A vi-all * unknown to fame ;
Her mother's name was Mary Ann,

And hers was Betsey Jane.
Every morning in the summer time

She crossed the briny " riv-i-ure,"
To a market where she sold fresh tripe,

And " sassengers," likewise liver.

There was a gallant grocery man,

McCloskey was his name ;
His lighting weight was seven stone ten,

And he loved sweet Betsey Jane.
He was different from most " mereh-i-ents,"

That lived in those days of "yo-i-ore,"
And provisions they were " plen-ti-ey "

In h.s little grocery store.

Now, this young man was as polite

As most young men-hunts are,
And his store was always ' crosvd-i-ed "

With damsels young and fair.
It happened that s\veet lietsey Jane,

In love fell sick and " so-o-ore "
With this gallant young grnrery man,

And his little groc' ry siore.

McOloakej in return loved her
With all his might and main,
I |WOre that none should separate him

me.

182 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

And Betsey Jane she also swore

She'd prove both kind and " true-wew-wew,"
And that no butcher's " clev-i-ure "

Should cut their love in two.

But McCloskey was weak " mindi-ed,"

And forgot the vows he made.
He deceived the poor young " darn-su-el,"

And left the grocery trade.
Then started off to " Jers-i-ey "

One day in the month of " Ju-u-une,"
And he hired a house in Erie street,

"Where he keeps a gin saloon.

When Betsey Jane she heard this news,

She soon gave up all hope,
And stabbed herself like a hero bold

With a bar of Windsor soap.
Now, all young maids, a moral take,

And as I've said " befo-o-ore,"
Never fall in love with a grocery man,

Nor his little grocery store.

POETICAL EFFUSION BY A PLEBE.

It is well known that many a class
Has passed this place of fame;

But the " Plebes of '63 " surpass
All others that ever came.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

183

THE ARMY BLUE.

(As sung by the Graduating Class of 1865.)

We've not much longer here to stay,

For in a week or two
We'll bid farewell to " Cadet grey,"

And don the " Army Blue."

CHORUS.

Army Blue, Army Blue,
We'll don the Army Blue,
We'll bid farewell to " Cadet grey,"
And don the "Army Blue."

With pipe and song we'll jog along,

Till this short time is through,
And ;dl among our jovial throng

Have donned the Army Blue.

CHOBUS.

To Ethics, Mineralogy,

And Engineering, too,
We'll bid good-bye without a sigh,

And don the Army Blue.

CHORUS.

To the ladies who come up in June,

We'll bid a fond adieu,
And hoping they'll be married soon,
We'll don the Army Blue.

CHORUS.

Now here's to the man who wins the " cup,"*
May he be kind and true,

ne. The allusion to the "cup" has reference to the "class baby-cup,'
which was to be presented t<> the parents of the first male child of the class.

184 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

And may he bring et our godson " up
To don the Army Blue.

CHORUS.

Now, fellows, we must say good-bye,
We've stuck our four years through,

Our future is a cloudless sky,
We'll don the Army Blue.

CHORUS.

Hip, slap, bang, hurrah ! !
Army Blue, Army Blue,
We'll don the Army Blue,
We'll bid farewell to Cadet grey,
And don the Army Blue.

EPITAPH ON " OLD L ."

'Tis said that when Dante, that wonderful man,

Made conical sections of hell,
He included both sinners and saints in his plan,

But omitted a place for old " L ."
So he fastened a hook to the vertex outside,

Holding on by his fingers and toes,
On which he decreed that old " L ," when he died,

Forever should hang by his nose.

MY EQUESTKIAN EXPERIENCE.

Just out of the hospital, and about the most used-up
man you ever saw. Been there three weeks from the
effects of taking too much violent exercise in the riding-
hall. Have had the most singular, and, at the same time,

3T POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

185

ie most terrible pounding that has ever occurred since
e commencement of the Christian era.
Although, during the past few weeks, I have suffered
like a martyr, 1 cannot help laughing when I think about

Our class commenced riding on the 1st of November,
864. It is divided into four platoons, two of them riding
one day, and the other two the next, and so on. There
out twenty men in each platoon, and we ride one
hour each alternate afternoon. Last Wednesday my
platoon went to the riding-hall, and all the scenes that
ere rnaeted there would be to* killing to relate. I had
n warned l.y several first -class men not to take certain
horses, as they were the worst in the stables; but, with
my usual luek. after looking around to find a sleepy-look-
ing horse, I succeeded in getting one of those same abom-
inable brutes I had tried to steer clear of. My feelings,
however, were spared for awhile, for " ignorance then was
bliss."

186 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

We all mounted in good style, and then the command
"Cross stirrups! " was given. Before going any farther,
I must explain a little. We had all understood that we
were to' ride simply with a blanket at first, but we found
that our Riding-master was going to make us ride with
saddles, and with crossed stirrups. That was something
no "third class " had ever attempted before; and it is my
opinion, soberly expressed, if you want a man's soul and
body to part company, just place him on a hard trotting
horse, with a "No. 3 McClellan saddle," with no stirrups,
and set him going ! If you find anything left of him when
he stops that is, if he does stop it will be little less than
a miracle. Well, we all mounted with the stirrups,' and
then, at the command, crossed our stirrups over the
horses' necks, just in front of the pommels of the saddles,
and started off. The brute (Reynolds) I was on, showed
a decided inclination to stand on his ears, and on the tip
end of his tail. He started off, however, at a walk quite
respectably, but at the command ' Trot! March ! " " Oh !
Then began the tempest to my soul !" (I never fully realized
the sense of that expression before.) To my intense disgust,
my horse was determined to get to the head of the platoon,
and accordingly started off on one of the most terrific, hard,
swift, long, stiff -legged trots that ever had fallen to my lot.

The saddle must be described. It was one of the same
kind I had used in the Volunteer Cavalry, but in size
plenty large enough for a man of "Daniel Lambert's''
dimensions. In addition to this, it had been worn so
confoundedly smooth and slippery by constant use, that it
was'just like glass.

,;:

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 187

Tin- bare idea that a person of my size could keep him-
If within hailing distance of siich a saddle, was perfectly
absurd. In riding without stirrups, we have to hold our-
Ives on, by the pressure of the knees and thighs. When
IK- old brute started oiV with such an infernal hard trot,
I felt my insides travel up and down at the rate of a mile
a minute, and I commenced striking the saddle like a
rubber ball, bounding in spite of all I could do, as if I had
; knocked on the head with a club, and struck the
saddle only to bound up again. In addition to this grace-
ful but eccentric movement, I rolled all over that abomin-
able saddle, sometimes riding Indian fashion, with one leg
the saddle, and the other within six inches of the
tun-bark. For a change, my head and his neck would
i in a most unexpected manner, and then I would
travel backwards with indescribable rapidity. In spite of
all the old beast could do, he did not get rue off until the
command " Gallop! ' was given ; but I was getting dread-
fully bruised all the time.

When the command ''Gallop'/' was given, I felt
relieved, for I Im^il that I could get the brute into a
gallop, but how cruelly was 1 deceived! for he immedi-
ately '//'/ out" with a gait that struck me dumb with
terror. His preceding movements were like the motion
of a cradle, compared with those I had yet to undergo.
The old hypocrite stalled oil' with three or tour steps of
E&Op, and just as I was getting accustomed to
6 motion, lie would suddenly put in live or six " //V/-.s "
f his hardest, stiil'est trot. The combination was too
ludicrous to be described, but oh! how I was sullering!

188 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

All this time I had not dared to raise my eyes, for my
"gallant steed' 7 occupied all my attention; but when,
unfortunately, I did look up, the sight fairly made me
roar with laughter, notwithstanding all my pain. There
were ten or twelve cadets in front of me, and six or eight
behind me, lumping, rolling, climbing around, all over their
saddles, in the most ludicrous manner possible. You know
<; Misery loves company," and when I saw those other
poor fellows jolted up and down like shuttlecocks, and
knew 4 they were catching it too, I laughed as I never
laughed before. Any body would have thought me crazy,
for I laughed and groaned, till the tears came into my
eyes. But the laughing proved disastrous, for it used up
what little strength I had left, and I felt that I could not
stick on much longer. I knew I should have to fall off,
but I did hate to be the first one thrown in our platoon.
Oh ! how I did wish that somebody would tumble off
before me, for I was determined not to be the first one
unhorsed. At last I saw one poor fellow tumble off, heels
over head into the tan-bark, and I immediately followed
suit. If my life had depended on it, I couldn't have held
on another second. I struck flat on my back in the tan-
bark, and the horse kept on with the rest. I did not get
injured in falling, but I was very weak, and I knew if I
ever got on again, I should not be able to keep in the
saddle. As I got slowly up out of the tan-bark, the Rid-
ing-master yelled out "Catch your horse, and mount,
sir ! " 1 stood still, and as the horses passed me. then at
a walk, I caught my charger, and climbed up into the
saddle.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 189

No sooner were my stirrups crossed than that horrible
"Trot! March!" was given, and at it we went. I did
not get once around the hull before I tumbled oft* again.

staggered up on my feet, and the Riding-master, seeing
[ was nearly used up, told me to rest a few minutes
ore re-mounting. When I was ready to mount, he
changed my horse, and gave me another which he prob-
ably thought would be easier for me, but this ugly brute
(' Pandora," the most vicious horse in the stables), in
addition to the eccentric qualities of the other horse, had
a peculiar knack of twisting her whole skin, which made
my head twirl like a top. While we were on a terrific
gallop, she actually threw me over her head, and I struck

I my hip against the boards that are placed as a protection
against the stone walls, and fell directly under her. I
was not totally insensible, but I hadn't the power to move
at first, it shocked me so dreadfully. The horse behind
me would have stepped on me, but his rider an excel-
lent hor>eman made him jump over me. As I lay
there, the horses, one after another, either jumped over

I me, or shied to one side, and I hope I may never again
experience such a terrible sensation. There seemed to be
a perfect halo of horses' heels around my head, and I ex-
pr.-trd every second that one of them would go crashing
through my skull. Pleasant thought, wasn't it? After
they had all passed, I crawled painfully up on my feet for
the third time, so completely knocked up that I could
scarcely speak, breathe, or move. The old wretch of a
Hiding-master was going to make me re-mount for the
third time, but I told him I had hurt my hip, and then he

190 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

let me go to the hospital. As soon as I went out of the
hall, I felt a sort of faintness come over me, and was finally
carried feet first to the hospital by two of the cadets.

I could not lie down with any comfort, neither could I
walk, nor sit down. The inside of my thighs, clear down
to my knees, was completely black and blue. Every
muscle and nerve in my body seemed twisted out of place,
and I only hope that no mortal will ever suffer as I did
during the next week. I was rubbed with liniment, and
by Saturday I felt much easier, and now I have entirely
recovered, except a little stiffness in my back and hips.
A little more exercise in the riding-hall to-morrow after-
noon will limber me up some, I expect. Seven cadets
were thrown in our platoon that day, and those who did
stick on, suffered dearly for it. There is scarcely a third-
classman who does not go walking around like an ani-
mated pair of dividers. It is one of the most cruel things
that can be thought of, to be obliged to ride without
stirrups for the first time on such perfect devils as some
of those horses are. There were upwards of thirty who
were thrown, and only three or four of them were injured
none severely. One had his foot stepped on in a play-
ful manner by one of the incarnate fiends, mashing his
big toe into a jelly ; but that was not of much conse-
quence, as it has now recovered. Many were severely
bruised, but in ninety-nine cases out of a hundred, it is
impossible for a cadet to get hurt badly by being thrown
in the riding-hall. The only way is to ride right through,
and take the pounding and bruises, and get used to it.
The remedy is a rough one, but the only one effectual.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

I used to think in my younger days it was fun to go to
a circus ; but there is no necessity for a circus ever to
come to West Point whenever the third-class commence
riding, for then we have one of our own, in which each
rider is clown, lofty tumbler, acrobat, and monkey, all
combined in one. Before my class graduated, one cadet
had his leg broken, and two others were rendered lame
for life, by some of those same satanic beasts.

A DIABOLICAL EXTRACT.

Cadet ! repent thee quickly of thy sins,

Ere yi't thy final punishment begins ;

Lest thou, alas ! too soon the power mayst know,

192 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Of " forces" not in " equilibrio."

Down to those depths which sun ne'er shone upon,

The " force of gravity " shall draw thee on,

And thou wilt find in sorrow and in pain,

That thy "inertia" will resist in vain.

" Sulphurous flames," anon, burst on thy view,

The "symbol," thou knowest well, is "S. 0. 2 "

And then with fear thy frightened eyes will see

Flames of that stuff we represent by "P."

But one sweet thought may thy sad spirit cheer,

In that bad place, they drink their whiskey dear ;

For strange although the statement seems to be,

There's no "HO" although so "HO-T."

CARMEN AD TERRY.

[The following was written at Bichmond, Virginia, during the Rebellion, and is
inserted in the collection by request. ]

Terry, leave us, sumus weary;
Jam nos taedet te videre,
Si vis nos with joy implore,
Terry, in hac terra tarry
Diem nary.

For thy domum long'st thou non-ne ?
Habes wife aut filios bonny
Socios Afris, magis ton-y ?
Haste then, Terry, military,
Pedem ferre.

Forte Thaddeus may desire thee,
Sumner, et id om., admire thee,
Nuisance nobis (not to ire thee),
We can span thee, magne Terry,
Freely very.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Hear the Prex's proclamation,
Nos fideles to the nation.
Gone est nunc thy place et station,
Terrifier momentary,
Sine query.

Yes, thy doom est scriptum "Mene."
Longer ne nos naso tene,
Thou hast dogged us diu, bene;
Loose us, terrible bull Terrier,
We'll be merrier.

Bid thy dulces Afros vale
Pompey, Scipio, et Sally
Seek some back New Haven alley,
Terry, quit this territory,
Con amore.

193

verba tibi abituro;
Pay thy rent bills; et conjuro,
Tecum take thy precious Bureau;
Terry, Turner, Blue-coat hom'nes,

Ab hinc omnes !

MY PIPE AND I.

Now, my good pipe, I'll light thee;
And whilst the smoke-clouds rise,
I'll sit and dream, as slightly
Tlu-y curl before my eyes.

In varied forms around me,
The blue wreaths turn and twist,
Expanding till they've bound me
In sparkling wavy mist.

194 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Now Fancy^spreads her pinions,
And waves her magic wand,
And gladsome, life-like visions
Spring up beneath her hand.

Anon she calls on memory
For scenes of by-gone days;
Or opens wide futurity
To our expectant gaze.

'Neath every clime she takes us,
From polar ice and snows,
Where winter's chill e'er shakes us,
To where the simoon blows.

Dear pipe, to thee we owe this,
For thou dost Fancy aid ;
Yet, though ascetics know this,
Against thee they've inveighed.

Let those, then, who decry thee,
Themselves forbear thy use,
I siill will love and try thee,
Despite all their abuse.

THE BILLY GOAT.

Two ladies, young and fair,
And of cadets a pair,
"Were I'll not say where.

One day in winter,
Bound a bright fire they sat
Talking of this and that,
During their merry chat,

Thoughtless of danger.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Sud don, a noise they hear,
Slight it is true, but near,
As though some person were

With the door tampering.
Soon, wide it opes, to show,
With his face all aglow,
" Neil." with a goat in tow;

Then what a scampering ! !

195

io " cries-" Murder ! fire ! "

'.lie" screams louder, higher,

v misfortune dire
At the intruder.

196 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

No door nor window nigh,
No place to hide or fly;
What could they do, but cry
Louder and louder ?

Still the goat onward hies,

Spite of noise, screams, and cries,

Fire flashing from his eyes,

Straight to " Miss Nellie."
" Cadets ! " exclaims she no vV
" Do ye in trembling bow ?
"Will ye a goat allow,

Thus to tramp o'er me ? '*

No that would never do;.
Up to their feet they flew,
"Charley'' and "Dnnbar" too*

Facing the monster.
He, in turn, halts to see
Who the rash youths can be,
That would thus recklessly

Rush into danger.

Though goat in battle yet,
Cadet had never met,
In their lips firmly set,

Reads he their mettle.
Still he moves on again,
Butting with might and main,
Till he has cut in twain

Their line of battle.

Thinking the field now won,
Madly he dashes on ;
" Nellie's" last hope seems gone,
When the goat falters;

LYP-BOOK.

Strength is of no avail,
All his mad struggles fail,
" Dunbar " has seized his tail,
"Koe," his long whiskers.

Stopped thus in full career,
Held both in front and rear,
" No night nor Blucher near,"

Yields he to numbers.
All his bold projects marred,
Banished the hotel yard,
Under strict watch and guard,

" Goatie " now slumbers.

"DADEGAN'S HIVE."

A flute's mellow notes, and a guitar were heard,
As " Padi-gaii " inspected, December the third;
" Ha! ha! " cried he, as he pricked up his ears,
"A good chance for a 'hive,' for one of my years."

S> with slow cautious steps he sped o'er the ground,
Not caring a cent, though George Harris was "fount/;"
To the "Sixth Div." lie strode no reluctance he felt,
Though the music he heard would a savage heart mult.

The cadets stopped playing; "Dadegan," he stared,
Then doffing bis cloak, his broad sword he bared ;
With arm high up-lifted, and fire-flashing eye,
From " DadeganV broad bosoin came forth this loud cry

<4 Back to your beds " he cried;
Thru as the torrents glide
From Mount Elanc's shaggy side
To the valley's destruction,

198

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

So down his broad sword flew,
Cleaving the air in two,
While his mad actions grew
Beyond misconstruction.

" Begone varlets ! 'way from here,
Step out ! sirs ; don't you hear ?
This music '11 cost you dear,
In ' extras ' and leather;
For this you'll walk the plain
In wind, snow, sleet, and rain,
Till your limbs ache with pain ;
No matter what weather."

He ceased; and o'er his startled hearers fell
A clammy dew that nought could quell ;
While from the stairs, through the open door,
Might now be heard " Medorem's" snore.

Grouped in a circle, " Dadegan " round
They stood with eyes bent on the ground;
Pointing to one the finger of fate,
" Dadegan " said " your name, sir, state ! "

With form erect, with voice clear and bold,
This one replied it need not be told
That his face became a little paler
" My name, dear sir, is Charley Shaler."

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The next who caught " Dadegan's " eye,
Was a strapping young fellow and why
He's nick-named " Sedge," I declare that's
Too much for me; his true name's Pratt.

In his turn came unfortunate " Bricks,"
Fiddler's luck, less pennies than kicks
Fell to his lot; his last song's sung,
Hushed his voice, his guitar's unstrung.

No more he'll sing while free from quarters,
That sad lay, " Ratcatcher's Daughter ; "
No more, no more our hearts he'll cheer
With the sweet notes of " Gay Cavalier."

Thus through the band " Dadegan " ran,
He "hived" Wood and Wager; and Mahan
Has found ere this, or I'm mistaken,
That " 1 P. M." don't save his bacon.

199

The last he caught was " round-head " Moss,
To ptiint his sorrow I'm at loss,
With downcast face did trembling stand,
A " chunk of rosin " held in his hand.

And thus by the aid of Luna's pale light,
In one rank formed squad, faced to the right,
With a solemn tread, all wrapt in gloom,
They followed " Dadegan " to his room.

NOTE. -The above was written in consequence of the " Amateur Cadet Band's"
ing " hived " by the Inspecting Officer one night "after Taps," while they were
n muling in Ixirnicks without permission. As a natural result, the entire band
reported and punished, and had all their musical instruments confiscated.

200

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

MEDITATIONS BY ONE TURTLE.

To think of that day on the plain

Causes my blood to curdle,
The day I did my elbow sprain,

When " Burwell" baulked the hurdle.

CAMP OF '66.

(Class of 'Q>1.)

For three long years we've been struggling through,

Vive la compagnie !

Studies in plenty, and drills not a few,

Yive la compagnie !

And now to the Camp we're hurrying fast,

"Which, praised be the Lord ! is surely our last,

The time flying quickly, it soon will be past,

Vive la compagnie !

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 291

The ladies' sweet smiles will quicken the hours,

Vive la compagnie !

On cheeks richly decked with youth's fairest flowers,

Vive la compagnie !

A hand snowy white gently rests on your arm,

The rosy lips whisper like leaves 'fore a storm,

While the eyelashes droop, and the cheek flushes warm,

Vive la compagnie !

The lights shine softly on bosoms fair,

Vive la compagnie !
On fairy-like robes perfuming the air,

Vive la compagnie !

On taper waists clasped in the galop's wild sweep,
AVhile tiny feet hide, or now and then peep,
And bright eyes soften, and heart pulses leap,

Vive la compagnie I

As long as with hope and ladies we're blest,

Vive la '67!
ire we for drills, parades and the rest ?

Vive la '67 !

Tin- pleasures are many, the troubles are nix,

So then lot us all a brimming bowl mix,

Ami ilrink to the Camp of Sixty and Six,

Vive la '67 !

"TE ROGAMUS."

Dear General, since you have held
Your sway paternal o'er us,
Your care unceasing has expelled
Au^ht that might fret or bore us.

e built a Laundry for our use,
And put machinery in it,

202 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

"Which has withstood a year's abuse,
And stands intact this minute.
In vain do grumblers fume and fret,
And swear by all that's holy,
That for some things they're waiting yet,
That whole things come back Jiole-y.
Of shirts too, spoiled by rust, they speak,
And collars limp and mouldy;
To pass in silence, " skins " each week,
For " lists " not as they should be.
We should not speak of trifles such,
Of course we should not, should we ?
For wash-bills are not twice as much
As ere you built the Laundry.
The roads, the docks your skill has made,
'Tis not for us to mention;
Although in them you have displayed
Both talent and invention.
So we'll pass on to something which
Assumes more vast importance,
Than dock or bridge, than road or ditch,
Or any mere convenience.
'Tis known that woman since the day
"When simple father Adam
By mother Eve was led astray,
And ate the fruit denied 'em,
A pest to man has ever been,
Beguiling, by her beauty,
The priest from prayer, the saint to sin,
The soldier from his duty.
Against an enemy so fair,
"What could we fellows do,
But lavish buttons, hearts, and hair ?
At least we did, till you
By opposition, wisely stern,

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

203

To " permits," hops, flirtations,
The wily fair ones caused to mourn
O'er wasted fascinations.
After a benefit like this,
Conferred without our asking,
To ask for more must seem amiss ;
But still your kindness tasking,
Dear General, I must crave one
More mark of love and favor,
To crown what you've already done
And make us yours forever.
In former times you know we could
Have wafer " ad libitum,"
To bathe as often as we would,
And gas " ad infinitum;"
"Until you judged that lights should all
I'M- doused before eleven;
And that one bath a month in fall,
Would be sufficient often.
But as for near a fortnight now,
The bath-rooms have been shut up,
There soon will be a jolly row,
Tn less more water turns up;
For though we love not " dry-baths" less,
AY hen other things are equal,
Once in awhile we must confess,
A " water-liath '' seems needfuL
Now, General, if you'll permit,
AYe'll olV.-r ;i petition,
HopiDg the plan that we submit
AVill meet your quick decision;
To draw us from our present fix,
And render water handy,
The Officers need only mix
irad'r in their Brandy.

204 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

"MOTHER GOOSE, No. 2."

A stands for Almy, whose nick-name is "Jake,"

Whose soldierly longings his back they did break.
B stands for Bassel, or otherwise " Dad,"

A liking for fish-horns and nozzles he had.
C stands for Campbell, alias ole " Legs,"

Who is naught but a shadow from his nose to his pegs.
D stands for Davis, jocosely called "Jack,"

Who hasn't much hair, and that isn't black.
E stands forEckhart, though "Buck" 's his nickname,

Who can ride a slow horse with the aid of his mane.
F stands for Farragut jolly old " Bricks,"

Who sings little songs, and his guitar often picks.
G stands for Griffith, whose hair's made of wire,

Who can pick every lock, and yell at a fire.
H stands for Heintz, who at " Buttermilk Falls,"

For unlawful objects oft uselessly calls.
J stands for Horatio Ap Morgan Jones,

Who is famed in the Corps for " Division o' platoons."
Let L for Lomia, the foreigner stand,

Whose baritone voice your applause will command.
M stands for Mahan, who does nothing but toot,

Day in and day out on his confounded flute.
O stands for Osgood, who on furlough, when asked

If he'd had any " extras," said "he'd walked off his last."
P stands for Pitman familiarly "Pit,"

Who has a large nose, and thinks he's a wit.
B stands for Bogers, both "William" and " Bob,"

" Will " 's some on back hair, " Bob's " nose is a snub,
g stands for Schenck, who dances with grace,

With his eyes gently closed and a smile on his face.
T stands for Thornburgh, whose yarns are far-fetched;

In believing them all, one's conscience is stretched.
W for Wood, now brings up the rear,

Whose bass-viol's groans are awful to hear.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

205

A LAMENTABLE BALLAD.

Being ye true historie of what misfortunes befell one " Muss-Shed.'
(By his Widow.)

" Muss- shed '' was a gay young bummer,

Never will YOU find a rummer,

Though you search for many a summer.

In dreams I think I see him yet,
A handsome swallow-tailed cadet,
AY hose coat had e'er the neatest set.

AYhosc buttons many fair ones prized,
AY hose cruel arts caused many sighs,
And dimmed many a pair of eyes

AYith tears, whose jewelled lustre shone
On him unmoved, the while his tone
AYas carders of their hopes o'erthrown.

And often through the mazy dance,
Revolved this " Muss-shed's" striped pants
Like the rude rustic contrivance,

AYhose use we know, and that right well,
But which I don't intend to tell,
leather I'll force my thoughts to dwell

On " Muss-shed's" sad, unhappy fate.
Ah! woeful tale, do I relate!
All lonely is my widowed state!

Poor "Muss-shed " wouldn't "bone his Chim."

mysteries were dark to him,
And ho his chance was pretty slim.

200 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

" Low-Bain's " voice sounded in his ears,
His " hardly " filled his soul with fears,
While his dry tones were full of sneers.

And though he wrote reactions o'er
The black-board, thus to prove his lore,
And though he mentioned every ore

That e'er was dug from out the ground,
Or picked from off the Earth's fair round,
Misfortunes all his efforts crowned.

The Adjutant, with dreary shout,

" Muss-shed ! deficient ! " soon read out,

And " found " he was beyond a doubt.

The buoyant hopes of three long years,
The painful struggles, doubts, and fears,
Were ended then, when on his ears

That sentence fell. All joy was fled,
He wished himself among the dead,
This same unfortunate u Muss-shed."

With frenzied steps he sought the river,
And though the cold caused many a quiver,
It was not fear that made him shiver.

'Tis said, that while he pondered there,
He sighed a sigh, and breathed a prayer;
But unto this I will not swear.

But if he did (I wish I knew),
The sigh was for his love so true,
The prayer was for the trusting few

Who money unto him had lent.
How often had their bills been sent !
How few r of them will get a cent !

WEST POINT SCRAr-BOOK.

He paused not long upon the brink,
But plunged down boldly in the drink;
His gravity did make him sink.

There, 'midst the dank weeds, prone, he lies;
The light has vanished from his eyes,
And never more will he arise.

Although he's gone, my " Muss-shy " friend,

And whilst I mourn his awful end,

This thought shall peace and solace send,

And every present joy enhance ;

Next summer thro' the mazy dance,

I'll whirl in " Muss-shed's " " demmy" pants.

20'

THE BATING.

Once upon a morning dreary,
"Whilst I pondered sad and weary,
Over the remains of cooking,
And the grease upon my floor,
Suddenly there c;ime a tapping,
As of Kent or Piper rapping,
Jlapping on my chamber door;
Only this and nothing more.

AYhat 1 said T will not mention,
AYheu I heard a " Stand attention ! "
Coming from my chamber door.
Up I jumped, nor word did utter,
As with many a sn ill' and splutter,
Came the giant form of " Forest "

:ng on my greasy floor;
Lord l>e praised 'twas nothing more.

208 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

And behind him came a creature,
Human as to form and feature,
Whom I recognized as " Jay-Key,"
Gazing, too, upon my floor.
Then I heard this creature vicious,
Putting on a smile malicious,
Mutter " You've been having cooking!
That is what has greased your floor ! "
"Only this, and nothing more."

" Yes," said Forest, "I can smell it,

'Tis so plain that one can tell it

By the odor of the cooking,

And the grease upon the floor."

Then his spirit burned within him,

And he said to " Jay-Key " " Skin him !

Skin him for the smell of cooking !

Skin him for a greasy floor ! "

" Yes," said " Jay," and something more.

Then he looked around him brisker,

Came the horizontal whisker,

In the middle of my floor.

And he waved his right arm proudly,

And he said to me more loudly,

" Sir ! by what authority,

Did you cook and grease your floor !

Tell me ! Is there nothing more ? "

Then he said with look aggressive,
And with twist of head expressive,
" Put him on as Orderly,
Orderly for one week more ! "
"Yes," said "Jay-Key," " I will do it;
This young man shall surely rue it,
Hue the day that he had cooking,
Rue the time he greased his floor,
He shall serve for one week more !"

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Then they left me in my sadness,
Musing o'er the deed of madness,
Thinking of the smell of cooking,
And the grease upon my floor.
All my rights are turned to mourning,
Visions stern of " extras " dawning
On my tearful, blinded vision,
Cause me pain forever more.
That is all there's nothing more.

209

THE FAMOUS BILLIAKD-TABLE.

To any one who may be inclined to scoff at the idea
that there is an.y thing famous, or even extraordinary, in
the following sketch, I will merely say that any per-
son, who knows of the severe discipline of cadet life, und
the enormous penalties one has to pay for the breach of
any orders, or regulations, will appreciate the impudence
of the cadets who dured to violate orders in such an open
manner. Games of all kinds, cards, dice, billiards, etc.,
IM-'III - prohibited, the Tactical Officers were always on the
h okout for any violation of the order, and gloated with
anic glee whenever they could catch any unfortunate
delinquent

During the winter of 1805 and 'GG, certain members of
the Second Class coneeivud the brilliant idea of starting a
Billiard Club, and accordingly wrote on to " Griffiths." a
well-known billiard-table manufacturer in Xe\v York, and
had a nice carom-table, eight feet by live, made, paying
the sum of one hundred and fifty dollars for it.

210

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

It was accordingly sent up to Garrison's Station, address-
ed to one of the inhabitants to lull suspicion having the
appearance of a piano nicely boxed up. About 12 o'clock
on the night after its arrival at Garrison's some half a
dozen cadets "hived" Mr. Bratt's ox-sled, drew it down
the hill, over the river on the ice, and brought back the

VIEW FROM GARRISON'S.

billiard-table safely to Barracks. Some two weeks previ-
ous, we had bribed an old coal-heaver, who tended the
furnaces in the cellar under " C '"' Company's quarters in
the Barracks, not to know any thing which might occur
in one of the coal-rooms ; and accordingly had cleaned it
out nicely, put up a stove (the fuel was easily had),
boarded up the window, and filled it in with tan-bark to
deaden the sound of the balls, put in a card-table, some
half a dozen chairs, four kerosene-oil lamps with reflectors,
a supply of pictures on the walls, pipes and tobacco a
keg of cider, a barrel of crackers, and a whole cheese -m

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 211

all the surroundings of a " first-class " billiard-room,
I'pting spirituous liquors we being '' on pledge " at the
time. As I said before, the billiard-table arrived safely,
was taken down into the rooin, mounted on two carpen-
ter's li :iid levelled; and we started in full blast.
The ofiiivrs, in going down to the mess, frequently heard
the click of the balls, but could not account for it, until
three or four months after, when the check, which had
:ven to Mr. Griffiths in payment for the table, very
niy>ieriously came into the hands of the Treasurer of the

I Academy, and set them all to thinking.
They found out that the cadets had a billiard-table some-
re, but ivhcre they could not ascertain. so careful were
the - in going to and from the billiard-room. Many

an -arch did the officers make for that table,

i far as to search some houses in the vicinity
^it never dreaming that it could be in
the

The ladies at the Post heard of it, and teased and tor-
offioen unmercifully at their inability to catch

- e the table.

<let on j. lining the Hub paid a fee often dollars:
so our Club i <l in numbers and in wealth, though I

think i' ..filial to : ;b<mt thirty members.

Ma:.y a match-gii'sir of billiards did we have in the small
of the night, when we were supposed to be in our

: of " moleeules and eclips-

During tlu slimmer encampment of 1800, the table was
used, but during the fall, and the first part of the
itfl privileges on the sly, to the -great

212 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

detriment T>f our "Engineering/' and had no end of fun.
As all things temporal must have an end, so our billiard-
table was destined to be confiscated by the harpies in blue
uniform. One night in November two or three cadets left
their rooms in " undress uniform/ 7 consisting of drawers,
slippers, and dressing-gown, for the club-room, and, un-
fortunately, passed through the sally-port just ahead of two
officers who were returning from the "mess. The officers,
instead of halting the cadets at once, followed them with
cautious steps, thinking they might get a clue to the
detested billiard-table^ and " hive " them all red-handed.
Slowly and silently they followed the unconscious cadets
down into the basement under the " 6th Div.," and waited
in the dark at the entry, while the cadets went through
the hall and gave a mysterious knock on the door at the
other end. The door opened, a flood of light streamed
into the passage., the click of the balls sounded sweetly on
their ears, and sounds of many voices reached them. The
door closed, and the officers were in the dark again.

They held a whispered consultation as to whether they
should make the descent at once, or defer it until all the
officers could get together, and see the fun.

They finally decided to put it off until the following
night, get all the officers of the post, and make the descent
together. Little did those officers think that they, in their
turn, were followed by a solitary cadet, who suspected
something was up, and kept as close to their heels as he
could without being seen.

He had the benefit of their consultation, and as soon as
they left the basement and went home, he came to the club-

mWKST TOINT SCRAP-BOOK. 213

n and electrified us all by the account of our narrow
pe, and telling us also of the certainty of a descent the
following night.

KA meeting was called of all the members of the Club the
Rowing morning, and it was decided to make a virtue of
iiy, and yield in a handsome manner. So the room
as put in good order, the lamps cleaned and lighted
curly in the evening, a good fire started in the stove, the
balls spotted on the table, and a note addressed to the
u . Tactical Officers on duty at the Academy/' was folded
and laid on the table; the door was closed and locked, and

t; all withdrew in good order.
The note read as follows:
' We, the members of the Billiard Club of the First Class of the
rps of Cadets, desire to present this billiard -table, with all its
appurtenances, to the officers on duty at West Point, as a slight
token of our gratitude to them, for the generous courtesy displayed
by them towards us, in allowing us for so long a time to enjoy the
privilege of the Club. The table was manufactured in New York
early a year ;igo, and the room furnished at our own expense,
rom that time to the present we have freely indulged in this
amusement, and we cannot but feel most grateful to you for your
nerous forbearance. Hoping that you will be pleased to accept
is little token of regard, we are,

" Very respectfully yours,

" BY ORDER OF THE COMMITTEE."

earned afterwards, that shortly " after Tapa " on
;hat night, the officers assembled at the rooms of the
Officer-in-charge, and i>ro-vrdrd in a body to the I-
ment, all of them, no douht, chuckling at the idea of not
only confiscating the table, but also of "hiving" fifteen

214 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

or twenty cadets, and placing them in arrest. Several
knocks on the door meeting with no response, the door
was burst open, and they found themselves the recipients
of the very table that they had so long tried to confiscate !
One can imagine their mortification at being so completely
outwitted by the cadets.

Shortly afterwards the table was presented to the wife
of the Commandant of Cadets. The authorities could get
no clue as to who the cadets were, and the matter was
dropped ; but the officers for a long time were twitted by
the ladies at their grand failure in " hiving " the cadets.

WHERE HUDSON'S WAVE.

Where Hudson's wave o'er silvery sands,

Winds through the hills afar,
Old Cro' Nest like a monarch stands,

Crowned with a single star.
And there amidst the billowy swells

Of rock-ribbed, cloud-capped earth,
My fair and gentle Ida dwells,

A nymph of mountain birth.

The snow-flake that the cliff receives,

The diamonds of the shore,
Spring's tender blossoms, buds, and leaves,

The sisterhood of flowers,
Morn's early beam, eve's balmy breeze,

Her purity define;
But Ida's dearer far than these

To this fond heart of mine.
\

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

My heart is on the hills, the shades

Of night are on my brow ;
Ye pleasant haunts, and quiet glades,

My soul is with you now !
I bless the star-crowned highlands, where

My Ida's footsteps roam,
Oh ! for a falcon's wing to bear

Me onward to her Lome.

215

" KEEN " FROM THE MESS.

[SCENE. Officers Mess, Christmas Eve, '66. "Dad" and "Bobby" "taking a

smile."]

***********

Dad." Did you call for water, Bobby ? "

Bobby. "No; just the contrary. By the way, 'Dad/ do you
' savoir ' why Mr. Gifford is like necessity ? "

Dad. " Why ? Because because great Scott ! I could not guess
if I should try till till Mr. Swigert should grad-
uate."
>!/ " Well, because he knows no law ! "

[Col/apse of l Dad."]

216 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

"EXPERIMENTS."

AIB. " I wish I were a baby."

Oh ! Bartlett used to love us,

His lectures were so nice,
He gave them always once a week,

And sometimes had them twice.
Then when the morning bugle blew,

And clouds came o'er my brow,
He'd say " Let's have experiments ! f *

Why don't he do so now ?

CHORUS.
I'd rather be a laborer,

"Working by the hour,
Than " bone " these " old mechanics,"

That treat of " force and power."

He used to think so much of us,

He'd gather us around,
And show us all his queer machines,

With cords and wires round.
He'd talk and lecture to the class,

Explaining why and how,
While we dozed on without a care;

Why don't he do so now ?

CHORUS.
I'd rather be a laborer,

Working by the hour,
Than "bone" these "old mechanics,"

That treat of " force and power."

N. B. Apropos of the above

" What is the difference between an author and a Second Class-
man " boning his Mechanics ? "

ANSWER. "One fills his book, and the other books his 'Phil.' "

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 217

" AITCH EM BEE."

A new chemical compound discovered and analyzed by Cadet "ETONAY."

SYMBOL." Aitch Em Bee."
Has no equivalent.

Gaseous of a dark color, and very explosive.
Has a great affinity for alcohol, with which it combines in great
quantities.
Of great tenacity and importance.

(- Old Harry,
I Forrest,

Common names for it: 4

I The Black Prince,

[ The Horizontal Whisker.

Methods of detecting its presence.

1. Blow a fish-horn in the area of barracks.

2. Go through the manual at drill carelessly.

It abounds in large quantities at West Point, and was first found
> y Professor Church in a substance called Mathematics.

PRIVATE THEATRICALS.

has leen the custom at West Point for the past few
rears to have "Private Theatricals" once during each
winter. In years jnvvious this was more of a "minstrel
show ; " now, without intending to say anything at all
detrimental to the tastes of the Corps in those days, we
thought it would he rather more elevated and refined if
ild get up some theatricals ; so, long before Decem-
jr commenced, we wrote to a theatrical publisher, who
;nt us an innumerable lot of plays heavy tragedies and
[lilting farces ; and then we had great sport select-

218 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

ing the proper ones. A Committee was appointed to
read over all the plays, and endeavor to combine good
taste and sound judgment in choosing suitable ones.
After casting some aside because they were too " heavy,"
and others because of the great number of female char-
acters in them, they at last decided on the two following,
which are given with the " original cast 7? in the pro-
gramme below :

GIVEN BY THE

TJ. JS. OOIFtlRS OIF 1

AY W^ST P@OTT, HT. Y.,
IN THE FENCING ACADEMY,

SATURDAY ^VENING, PEC. 29x11, 1866.

(Positively the only Appearance of this Great Troop!!!

DOORS OPEN AT 7:30. ENTERTAINMENT TO COMMENCE WHEN WE GET READY.

Stage Manager and Director Cadet MAHAN.

Musical Conductor J. ELSON.

OVERTUBE ORCHESTRA.

Z.
THE MELANCHOLY DRAMA OF

LEOT ME FIVE SHILLIW&S.

(DURING THE PERFORMANCE OF WHICH NO LEVITT WILL BE
ALLOWED IN THE AUDIENCE.)

\ir r* r 1,4-1 f In whose pockets metalliferous deposits do not ob-\ /-, -i ,

Mr. Gohghtly. . { toin> a j nd wflo is spo j oney Ove / Mrs _ J/(7> . P , } Cadet SARTLE.

Captain Phobbs.. {*yf!f^^ EUFFNER.

Captain Spruce . .( Who "pines" for a majority in the V. R. C.). Cadet W. E. BOGEES.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

219

Moreland, a young Artist .

Sam (A ,,. ,i,l,,r,,,,,.< Mil,'si,,n. n-lii, kntiti'* what'* ir/tat) Cadet RODMAN.

i A'. // of the late lami-n/,;l M-ijor 1'., wko\

Mrs. Major Phobbs. ! ''/' >'>> rnt,,e,- a yneis* " , nil-'-} ti, /,/,/[ .Cadet O. E. WOOD.

( in tin 1 ti'ny of" ro< /,-.<' (an. -it ratified). . . )

Mrs. Captain Phobbs. J "'^ Z^L**" 1 "* Capt ' ] '""''''"' \ ....Cadet HODGSON.

Music ...................................................... ORCHESTRA.

II.
I. Quartette .......... Cadets HEATH, W. E. ROGERS, WAGER, 0. E. WOOD.

II. Fancy Dance ...................................... Cadet FARRAGUT.

IIL " Spirito Gentil" ...... (from Opera of La Favorita) ...... Cadet LOMIA.

IV. Fancy Dance ...................... Cadets S. R. JONES and FARRAGUT.

V. Quartette .......... Cadets HEATH, W. E. ROGERS, WAGER, O. E. WOOD.

VI. Flute Solo ........................................... Cadet MAHAN.

VII. Fancy Dance .................................... Cadet S. R. JONES.

VIII. " O ! Lisb< ma !" ____ (fnm Opera of Don Sebastian) ....... Ca set LOMIA.

Music ....................................................... ORCHESTRA.

III.

(A'O 7'/>/.A>7V.V7- INTENDED TO THE MASS. LEGISLATURE.)

Colonel Flutter. .. ( .| /,.,./. hut glightly apoplectic old gentleman) ____ Cadet CRANSTON.
Moiis Fripon ...... ,.i rr.,,,-h Ji<irl'r, in lure, with Mrs. Morton). . .Cadet FARRAGUT.

Jimmy Ducks, an Irishman. . {^%fin"-,\ hu ^ ..... Cftdet R **-

Mr^ Morton ................. (A ,,/.. ,/ lnil(tll , r ,,f twint) Cadet O. E. WOOD.

Fanny Nibbs ..... [ A ^ elnurs ^ (Ever;/ /"'/.'/ **oWAawj ..... Cftdefc HODGSON.

. . ORCHESTRA,

N. B. Those of the audience who wish to weep may draw handkerchiefs,
pmvidi-d they are out of debt. During the intermission between the Second
and Third Parts, officers will be allmvi-d to go down to the "Mess," provided
tin -y do not take any undue advantage of the permit Members of the Corps
not on plrd^r may partake of pea-nuts during this intermission. Persons not
able to procure seats, can have the privilege of bowling Ten-Pins in the
Gymnasium.

220 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The plays chosen, then the trouble commenced, assign-
ing the parts.

Smith couldn't take the part of " Moreland, the young
Artist/' because his hair didn't curl, and all young artists
were supposed to have curly hair. Brown couldn't take
the part of " Mrs. Major Phobbs," because his voice was
too deep, and then, you know, he didn't have enough
style. White couldn't act "Mrs. Captain Phobbs," be-
cause he was too infernally tall, and, then, his complexion
was too dark. Robinson was too painfully thin to
take the character of "Mrs. Morton," as the "mother
of twins." Short's nose was too long for a female, and,
besides, his hair was red. Long having been "found in
French " the previous year, couldn't be expected to act
11 Mons. Fripon," " the French barber."

Right here, let me give all amateurs a bit of advice if
you have a good, energetic Manager, you will be sure to
succeed. We had a good Manager, and consequently we
had the parts assigned at last without any ill-will. We
rehearsed nearly every afternoon after 4 o'clock, in one
of the Barrack-rooms, and by the middle of December we
knew our parts perfectly. About a week before the
Theatricals came off, we were all busily engaged in build-
ing a stage, fixing curtains, foot-lights, &c., in the
" Fencing Academy," using the little room where " Tony"
keeps his foils, gloves, and ponderous broadswords, for a
dressing-room. Here was where the abilities of our
Manager came into play. He built the stage constructed
it so that the front of it was a perfect ellipse ; he put up
the curtains, arranged the furniture, was here, there,

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 221

and everywhere. Without him we should have failed
most egregiously. Then, what a rummaging around the
Post for costumes, &c. ! We remember the cadet who
represented the character of ''Mrs. Morton/' "the mother
of twins," going down to the "Dutchman's" and vainly
endeavoring to borrow a couple of the " Frow's " babies,
knowing, with her numerous progeny, she would not have
missed them ; but she was afraid " dose caddets would
hurt dem," and very wisely refused to loan any of her off-
spring. He was consequently reduced to the necessity of
ncianufacturing two immense rag babies out of some old
a 'tillery pants, painting their faces on white cloth, in a

Kv artistic manner. Two cradles were hired of a junk-
ler in Highland Falls. (Strange to say, there was not
adle to be found at the Post, in consequence of all the
children having been brought up " in arms/') The squal-
ling of the brats was performed by two " Plebes ? ' behind
the scenes. The dresses of the female characters in the
first play were really excellent; "Mrs. Major Phobbs "
l"iiiL r n 'splendent in real diamond rings, massive gold
aceleta, chain-, etc., and a rich green satin dress with a
g train. " Mrs. Captain Phobbs's " low-necked dress
odly au fait. Japanese switches and chignons
re borrowed from some of the ladies of the Post, to
lorn the heads of these beautiful females. Carmine and
took the place of rouge and pearl powder. \\'.>
fain to smile when we think of the entertainment of
pivvi<m> year, when a cadet, who was acting the part
f a dashing young lady, felt that the waterfall which
as fastened to the back of his head by an elastic began

222 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

to slip, and when, in the course of the play, he was obliged
to faint gracefully away, great was his mortification, and
greater still was the uproar and laughter of the audience,
when the unlucky coiffure came down, and rolled slowly
off the stage among the orchestra.

"Mrs. Captain Phobbs " rendered herself so fascinating
that one of the officers, who, no doubt, had paid frequent
visits to the ' ' Mess " during the evening, expressed a
strong determination to go behind the curtain and kiss the
aforesaid "Phobbs," but was deterred by his companions
as being detrimental to the interests of the service. l k Mr.
Golightly " was admirable, as he always was in any part
he undertook. Our "French Barber" was capital; no
wonder that the "lone widow' 7 was fascinated by his
attentions, and his generous present of a bottle of " Bar's
grease." " Antony Snow," the "irrepressible contraband,"
was, without exception, the " star of the evening." All
the characters were admirably sustained. Having been a
participant myself, perhaps I may not be considered an
impartial critic, but the audience were very enthusiastic,
and their continued applause seemed to inspire us with
unwonted vigor, and we certainly did our "level best."
The songs and dances were inspiriting, and well executed.
The small dressing-room presented a motley appear-
ance ; here stood, before a 12-inch mirror, a figure, to all
appearance that of a beautiful young female, busily engaged
in putting on the complexion (an art only known to the
fair sex and ourselves); while close behind this fair form
stood an elderly and very adipose gentleman, who was
trying to make the hooks and eyes meet, now and then

POI]

AP-BOOK.

223

giving vent to an expression very like an oath, as a hook
or an eye would break ; there sat the " Captahi's charm-
ing wife," in white skirts, buttoning up her boots, while
the " French Barber " was holding her dress ready for her
to jump into. Another cadet was trying to edge in front
of the glass to see the effect of the burnt cork und the
woolly wig ; the " Irishman " painting his nose a cherry-
red, and giving a rakish tilt to his hat; the u Captain "
waxing a fierce moustache; " Mr. Golightly " putting on an
exquisite pair of kids, and so throughout, as our worthy
Professor would say. It was, indeed, a motley group a
crowd of at least twenty cadets in a room ten feet by
twelve. The cadet who enacted " Mrs. Morton " was
obliged to dress in such haste, after singing in a quartette
ia his cadet uniform, that he forgot the waterfall entirely;
but having on a bonnet it was not noticed, as he was espe-
cially careful to always present a front view.

The ladies of the post were all very kind, lending us
<-h articles of their wardrobes, household furniture, and
thcr worldly goods as we needed.

They do say that some of the cadets were privately in-
structed how to swing their dresses gracefully, and get the
proper bend in walking. Be this as it may, the whole
allair was a perfect success, and all of us look back to
tho>e days with pleasure.

224 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

THE ALCHEMIST.

There was a bold chemist, " Old Kat's Eye " the great,
For composing reactions he ne'er had his mate.
(HS) made him fat, and (HO) made him lean,
And this jolly old chemist could never keep clean

CHORUS.

With " Miller " and " Fowne," he would do you up brown,
And bundle you off to your own native town.

It is said that when " Kat's Eye " was once on a drunk,

He mildly remarked to a volatile skunk,

" Some people object, but my dear little baste,

I assure you the smelling is quite to my taste."

A cannibal dread was this alchemist gay,

He'd chew up four men at the black-board each day;

Another on questions he'd playfully tackle,

And grind the poor boy till his phosphates would crackle.

"With " Induction " he put you in very queer holes,
This " Gymnotus Electricus " with opposite poles;
With his negative head, and his positive tail,
He'd floor you " as cold " as a man with a flail.

An " azotized group " was this festive " Old Hats;"

He dissolved not in ethers, in oils, nor in fats.

He'll be glad when the time comes to slip this world's cable,

And pass into compounds a little more stable.

Down in that region which people call Hell,
They understand " Thermo-Electrics " quite well.
But the Devil will " fess," when " Rat's Eye " the sly,
Says "minus orpins, Mr. Devil? and why?"

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK,

225

THE CADET'S SUNDAY.

"When tlio last faint light of the sun sinks clown

In the grave of Saturday night,
And the outer world at the thought of rest,

Feels a measureless calm delight,
The weary cadet, with a burdened heart,

Falls to sleep oppressed with sorrow,
To think of the manifold cares that wake
the reveille gun on the morrow.

THE CHAPEL.

For him it brings but a greater train

Of evils than all the week,
And he sighs to think how oft in vain,

"\Vith a reckless waste of cheek,
He has sued at the Surgeon's stony heart,

"NVith a fearfully put-on dejection,
But never succeeded by craft or art,

In "wheatoning" the Sunday Inspection.

He thinks of his gun with its dirty breech,
Of his bayonet spotted with rust,

Of his belt-plate's dark and murky phi/,
And his cartridge-box covrivd with dust;

226 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Of the screw- driver lost, and tompion flown,

Of the beard on which he doted,
And he mutters aloud, with sorrowful tone

" To-raorrow I'll sure be reported."

He gazes around at the cob-webbed walls,

At the floor all covered with grease.
(It was done last week, one night u after Taps/'

When he had with some comrades a feast.)
He longs for the day when, a gay graduate,

His charming young sweetheart he'll marry;
With neither a musket nor room to keep neat,

Hell ne'er dread the frowns of " Old Harry/'

But these are all trifles; the heaviest blows

The depths of his misery search,
And the worst of them all is that long ordeal

Those endless two hours at the Church,
Where his soul, like a criminal, sits in the stocks,

And suffers a tiresome par- boiling,
While he lists to the organ's horrible tone,

And the Minister's lifeless drawling.

A Corporal sits at the end of your seat,

With his watchful prying eyes,
Who like a hyena does hungrily gaze

At his certain trembling prize.
Through all the " long prayer " he bows down his head,

O'er a prayer-book seeming to pore,
While he only seeks to " skin " the first man

Who makes the least sound of a snore.

The grey-coated victims all yawning, save one,

Who, seeming to be a good man,
Is trying to hide "The Illustrated News "

By a prayer-book held in his hand;

227

AVliile the musical fellows up in the choir,

All smile at the fruitless labor
Of a " Plebe " below, who is trying to wake

With a pin, his drowsy neighbor.

The spruce young officer there with his " spoons,"

The older one too, with his wife,
The dignified " Prof.," the quiet old maids,

All nodding as if for dear life.
But we must sit still, and be patiently stewed

Like a pot-full of " Mess-hall slumgudgeon,"
Because if one " cuts it," he's sure to be " hived,"

And the "Supt." gets into high dudgeon.

" Six days shalt thou labor, and do all thy work ! "

And I think that Moses did best,
AVhen he added below, by way of respite,

"From work on the Seventh thou shalt rest."
But the High Priest of old would open his eyes,

And consider it very poor jesting,
If he could be present and see us enjoy

The military manner of resting.

Now our Chaplain says and I'm not making fun,

Be sure that I mean not to scoff
" That in Heaven they follow the golden sun

From its rise to the setting thereof;
"With nothing but service in church every day,"

If it's true, with a thousand regrets,
I must candidly say in sorrowful truth,

That Heaven is no place for cadets.

228 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

THE BIG MENAGEKIE.

AIR. ".Forty Tears Ago."

Attention ! all you dismal " Plebes,"

While the story I relate,
Of how I chanced to fall into

My present lost estate.
A moment only dry your tears,

And listen unto me,
For I'll describe the way we live

In this big Menagerie.

Ah ! well can I recall the time

When once I was a " cit,"
And all the hours crept sweetly by,

I wish they did so yet;
But I panted then for martial fame,

And thought that it could be
Found nowhere else, unless I came

To this big Menagerie.

And so upon the First of June,

I reported, wild with joy,
To think that life would surely be

Henceforth without alloy;
For, a " stunner " in my native town,

I vowed I'd easily
Upon my muscle go right through

This big Menagerie.

But, oh ! my bold defiant pluck
Oozed quickly all away,

Before I had a soldier been
For more than one long day :

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

They put me through a course of sprouts,

From which I could not flee,
And made me view the darker side

Of this big Menagerie.

And when with " Prelim." safely passed,

They marched me out to camp,
On weary errands far and wide,

For old cadets I tramp.
With squad-drill nearly all the day,

And police constantly,
I wish I'd ne'er enlisted in

This big Menagerie.

The first time that I went on guard,

The night was dark as pitch,
They took my gun, and then threw me

1 light in Fort Clinton ditch;
" The Corporal ! " I called aloud,

But not a step came he,
And thus I learned another dodge

Of this big Menagerie.

All day I scrub, police and drill,

Till trouble makes me weep,
And when the day is o'er, I am

Denied the boon of sleep ;
But all the night lie tremblingly

From taps to reveille,

IM I know I will be "yanked"

In this big Menagerie.

MY ancient joy of "spoonying,"

Is Jill knocked into smash,
And pleasures all concentered are

In eating Mess-hall hash;

229

230 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

For should I meet a lady-fair,
I dare not speak, for she

Would know that I was but a " Plebe "
In this big Menagerie.

They call us " beasts " and " vile reptiles,"

And goodness only knows,
I'd rather be a kangaroo

In one of the Circus shows;
For all the real animals

Are happier far than we,
For they know not what " squad-drill " is

In their Menagerie.

The lions, tigers, bears, and wolves

Can never feel our woes,
For who e'er heard of an elephant

Depressing his great toes ?
And e'en the little monkeys are

All happy, light, and free,
And carry their heads just as they please

In their Menagerie.

But soon this Camp will end, and then

My troubles will be o'er,
I'll drop the " beast " from off my name,

And sing this song no more;
But where'er I roam in years to come

On land or on the sea,
I'll ne'er forget the time I served

In this big Menagerie.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 231

A GENUINE CADET HASH.

(By one who has been there.)

Never having seen an account of a " cadet hash 7 ' in
print, I think it is my duty to bring before the public a
true un-yreased statement of the manner in which the
hungry " yearlings " prepare their midnight banquets.

" To go back to first principles, 77 as Prof. Church would
say, let me first explain the term hash. Probably no other
word in the English language has such a world of mean-
ing as the simple word " hash. 7 ' It is a complete mystery !
AYebster defines hash to be "minced meat, or a dish of
meat and vegetables chopped into small pieces, and
mixed. 7 '

In boarding-house parlance, it means a mixture of cold
meat be it canine, feline, or "tender-line" and vegetables
warmed over for breakfast, being the refuse of yesterday 7 s
dinner. Now, to a cadet, when he gets a " bid 77 " to come
up to my house to a hash after Taps/ 7 the word hash means

supper of roast chicken, or an oyster stew, a dish of
flic-candy, or a cup of chocolate and toast, a lot of cakes
and pi.-s from the "Dutchman's," or a basket of grapes
d apples from " Kinsley's, 7 ' two or three dozen hard-
ilcd eggs, or a genuine meat and potato hash. As the
ineiple is the "same throughout" [vide French] I will
ribo the hitler. Generally a rainy Saturday is selected,
d all the fellows in the "cockloft" assemble in my room
mediately after the return of the Battalion from dinner,
disgorge.

232 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

From under the overcoat of one cadet, appear two
loaves of bread ; another opens the breast of his overcoat,
and takes out two tumblers full of butter, packed in and
covered with a piece of bread; a third brings to light three
or four tumblers packed full of pieces of roast or corned
beef; a fourth rolls out from between the lining and the
outside of his cape, at least half a peck of boiled potatoes
with the skins on ; a fifth produces pepper and salt in
abundance ; a sixth contributes a few extra plates and
forks, although we have already in a box stored up in the
chimney, at least a half dozen plates, knives, forks, spoons,
cups, saucers, and tumblers, that we kept constantly on
hand for such occasions.

All of these provisions the cadets had "hived" from the
mess hall, at dinner that day, and the crockery in my
chimney was only the debris of previous hashes.

These articles having been carefully deposited on the
floor, I empty all the dirty clothes out of my clothes-bag,
and place in the bag, very carefully, all the component
parts of our midnight hash, and hang the bag up again in
the alcove.

The dirty clothes I'll leave on the floor, as it is Saturday
afternoon, and I won't get "skinned" for room out of
order, and besides some of them will be handy in wiping
the dishes after they are washed for the night.

When " Taps " sounds off, my room-mate and myself
temporarily retire, boots and all, and when the Inspector
of the Sub. Div. comes around, we sing out vociferously,
"All in ! " but before he has had time to get fairly down
stairs, up we jump, let down the window from the top

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 233

sufficiently to catch a blanket over it, up it goes, and no
possible chance for a light to be seen in our quarters; over
the transom on the door, a table-cover folded is just the
thing.

We wait a few moments in the dark, until all the fel-
lows have come softly along the hall to our door, and
have been admitted, when we boldly light the gas and
proceed to business.

If you look carefully at the small ventilator in the
chimney you will see a piece of string protruding ; unfas-
ten the piece of string, and let it slide slowly through
your fingers, and down the chimney comes our pet cook-
ing-stove, which, with the box of crockery is kept up the
chimney, out of the way of the officers. Our cooking-
stove is especially made to be used with gas ; one end of
a long rubber tube fits snugly over the gas-burner, the
other end opening into a perforated iron plate, which
forms the bottom part of the stove. A match touched to
that, and a clear, blue flame extends over the whole sur-
face; over the frame-work sits the pan in which we pro-
pose to make a hash that would put " old Bratt " to
shame. The wash-bowl, having been carefully cleaned out,
is made the recipient of the pieces of meat and potatoes
that two cadets are busy in cutting up, seated on the floor,
with pipes in their mouths, while a third is engaged in
peeling the potatoes.

As the crowd in our room is larger than our cooking-
pan will accommodate, we shall have to make two im
of it.

One cadet is busy cutting the loaves of bread into slices,

234 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

which another spreads with butter, to save time, as it is
no joke to undertake it after the hash is cooked, as all are
too ravenous then to do it for any one but themselves.
My room-mate fills the cooking-pan from the wash-bowl,
places it over the gas on the stove, and it commences to
cook. Ye gods ! What a delicious aroma arises ! It is
incomparable !

Look at the business-like way the cook puts in the but-
ter and the seasoning! His having been "found" in
French is all that prevents him from being an excellent
French cook. A little more stirring, a trifle more of salt,
and the first mess is done.

It is taken off the stove, and, according to " Kepler" it
takes just two-thirds of a minute to transfer it all to the
plates of those cadets who have succeeded in crowding up
to the table, to the detriment of my pet corn.

A second, and a third panful is cooked. Is there noth-
ing that will satisfy these hungry devils ?

Just my luck ! There is one more man than I have
spoons and forks ; never mind 7 I'll give him my spoon,
and take the shoe-horn. I don't mind the associations,
and, besides, it is just the size of my mouth. There ! I
have cooked all the hash there is, and the bread and
butter is all gone.

Now, let's all take a good square smoke ! Everybody
has brought his pipe ; but, singular coincidence ! no one
thought of bringing any tobacco, but it is all right, there
is "dead-loads" of smoking tobacco in the clothes-press.
The Academy clock has just struck twelve, and still they
linger. ********

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 235

Just my luck ! There is " Kent's " step on the lower
stairs! I can hear his sword rattle! Good heavens 1
what a scattering! Out goes the light ! overgoes my
table, hash, crockery, and all, on the floor ! open goes
the door, and out go as many cadets as can squeeze
through at once ! Up comes the Officer-in-chcirge, two
steps at a jump ! bull's-eye lantern in hand, stalks into
my room, to find my room-mate and myself fast asleep (?)
in bed ! not a soul else in the room ! only a chaotic
mass of dishes and hash on the floor, and my name as
Orderly staring him full in the face. After ineffectual
attempts to awaken us [it is astonishing how soundly
cadets do sleep !] he stalks out of the room. The next
evening at parade, I hear my name read out for
" Cooking in quarters, after Taps ;" " Cooking utensils in
quarters;" and "Tobacco smoke in quarters, after Taps ;"
all of which combination results in my "walking extras"
for the next six weeks.

DESCRIPTION OF CAMP LOOK-OUT.

Corps of Cadets, under the command of Colonel H.
'. Black, pitched their tents near the edge of " Round
Pond " on the morning of August 12th, 18G9, after
maivhing from Camp McPherson in a heavy rain-storm.

During the encampment the members of the First Class
were instructed in practical engineering by Col. Michie
and Lieut. Sears, of the Corps of Engineers, making
oral mounted reconnaissances and surveys through the

236

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

country, at the same time establishing signal stations
on high peaks, and making a judicious application of
their knowledge in this department, by successfully
transmitting messages to and from Camp. They also
opened communication with the Point by telegraph,
sending and receiving messages during the entire en-
campment.

The Corps was instructed in target-practice and skir-
mish drill, so that, at times, the hills surrounding Camp
presented a girdle of fire that might have aroused
the admiration of a veteran, or the apprehension of a
recruit.

Fishing, boating, and bathing were the pleasures of the

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 237

Camp, not to mention the welcome society of the ladies,
whose presence lent a charm to an otherwise dreary pros-
pect. Ever grateful will be the remembrance of the
Corps of those who, with unequalled kindness, made the
recollections of "Camp Look-out" the dearest of the
Camps of '69. "Spoony Point' 7 records many scenes
other than those afforded from its crest, which were of
unsurpassed beauty.

"Long Pond," several hundred feet below, presented
to the enraptured gaze, its placid surface, environed by
lofty and rugged hills clothed with rich foliage, making
one of the loveliest views that can be found anywhere in
the country.

The Corps struck their tents, and returned to Camp
McPherson on the 23d of August.

OUR ALMA MATER.

"Where Hudson pours his silver flood

In chorus grand along,
And Cro' Nest's rocky-seamed sides

Re-echo e'er his song,
Dear Alma Mater's \valls arise
'Neath fairer than Italian skies,

And brighter scenes among.

Four years ! a little span of life,

A little space of time,
I lingered in her ancient halls,

Wooed by her scenes sublime.

238

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The brightest joys that youth can bless,

Or early manhood know,
Smiled on me in the dear old place,

In days of "Long Ago."

THE ACADEMIC BUILDING.

Dear Alma Mater, lovingly

On thy fame-lighted brow,
I lovingly my tribute leave,

And breathe a blessing low;
May glory gild thy honored age,

Thy sons e'er worthy be
To guard thy name with loving care,

And dying, honor thee !

BEGGING PAKDON OF THE MOUNTED SERVICE, ETC

Pork is the food of the young Dragoon,
Is easily carried can be cooked soon,

And once I saw

It eaten raw
By that " broth of a boy," the young Dragoon.

" J/fl//

>T POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 239

Pork is the food of the young Dragoon,
"Who, outside of fort and demi-luue,

As he carries no gun

Takes things " as they run "
Yes, easily kept is the young Dragoon.

He " raids " far and wide, the young Dragoon,
His spurs keep time as he hums this tune,

Conspires with " nigs."

To capture pigs,
To get pork for the food of the young Dragoon.

ng in mind the services of mounted troops in their foraging,

they ever save their bacon ! "

SELAH !

[The great unknown.~\

FOURTEENTH OF APBIL, 1867.

Two years ago this day,

Blind treason struck the blow,
Aimed at the noblest in the laud,

Laid Abram Lincoln low.
A hush went o'er the land;

AVe felt a gathering gloom,
Clouding the sunny day of Spring

We laid him in the tomb.

Time winged his ceaseless silent flight,

Full bitterly we thought it o'er,
That Spring would smile on us again,

But we should see his face no more;
The kindly face that never frowned

"NVhone'er his cause the poor man plead,
The quiet smile, the honest heart,

Are gone; his memory's dear instead.

240 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The Ship of State, whose helm he held

With firm and skilful guiding hand,
Now helpless floats 'midst angry waves,

And fails to reach the promised land,
"We miss our pilot dear old Abe,

How dear to us we never guessed,
Until this day two years ago,

We laid him in his place of rest.

Green be the grass that o'er him waves,

As green his memory ever be,
Until we meet him in the land

That smiles beyond the silent sea.
In the fair cycles yet to come,

His name shall shine on History's page,
All other glorious names among,

The grandest, brightest of the age !

BON VOYAGE.

[ To a lady travelling in Europe. ]

Well ! off at last, and so, mignonne

Your mind is set on travel.
No penitent to Rome you go,

Your gaiters free of gravel;
Huge trunks are packed, your mind is racked

And on the raging main
You sail until the " douaniers "

Shall catch you in the " Seine."

Don't leave a single thing unseen,
Or else friends will upbraid you

Then, dear ! come back and show the goods
Their milliners have made you.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

A Paris hat ! a dainty thing,

I'd set a premium on it,
If I could see your charming face

Within that self-same bonnet !

I fear you'll climb the highest Alps,

Sweet one ! beware a tumble !
And when you peep in craters deep,

Lookout the brim don't crumble !
The Earth brings forth some loveliness,

But it could not repay
Our loss, if you were "fused " my dear,

In such a horrid way !

igh art, of course you will do up,

You like that sort of thing.
Go to " La Scala," nod applause

When fair Italians sing.
Bring pockets full of pebbles

From gentle Shakspeare's tomb,
And any other " little tricks,"

For which you may find room.

Of course, you'll be quite Gallic

In speech and accent too ;
Before you come to us again,

What lots of work we'll do !
We'll study French and learn the verbs,

So as to be " au fait ;"
To understand " quite a ravir,"

And when you're " dcsok-e !"

Beware the Counts and horrid Dukes !

The Chevaliers also !
Those " Blue Beards " of the Continent,

Oft steal our girls we know.

242 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

They marry some great man of rank,
And naught to us remains.

Come back ! and take a Cavalry man !
And go out on the Plains !

" Come back ! " like the Scotch chief of old,

"Who bawled across the water,
To that famed-erring-truant child,

" My daughter ! " " Oh ! my daughter ! "
We'll double on his offer make,

And with our hearts right merry,
We'll give an awful roll of bills

To bring you " o'er the Ferry *

You've ta'en the sunshine all away

From him who loves you best,
Forgetting that the dawn comes not

That way but to the West.
Bring smiles from sunny Italy,

And roses from the Rhine,
Come back and hear me pledge again,

The vow of old " Ich Dien."

MY OLD REVEILLES.

You may talk of your gaiters as much as you please,
Their beauty, their elegance, comfort and ease;
But of all the shoes that e'er shoemaker made,
Not a word that is better, of them can be said,
Than cadets will say, and they'll not say it to please,
But from pure honest love for their " old reveilles."

In long years ago they have seen their best day,
And tho' full of holes, I'll not throw them away,
But fondly will cherish, though the " uppers" wear out,

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

And the " soles" are all ready to " sail up the spout,"
For no shoes in the world can possess so much ease
For my poor tired feet as my " old reveilles."

Some people may scoff, and at sight of them jeer,
But I cling to them still for old memories dear;
They covered my feet when a Plebe in distress,
And into my "yearling year" helped me to press;
They've lasted me well, and if Fate decrees,
I'll wear them forever "my old reveilles."

And at last when " old Patrick" shall come in and say,
"I'll take all the rimnants that ye'ez thrown away."
And bear the old rubbish to the pile down below,
Along with the rest in the dust and the snow,
You'll see them there lying, those wonders of ease,
Sad, lonely, neglected, my " old reveilles."

Others and newer will take their old place,

And with plenteous blacking shine smiles in my face,

My feet may look smaller, feel better (perhaps),

But in the sweet slumbers that come " after Taps,"

Foremost and fairest of all visions that please,

Will be happy fore-shadowings of my " old reveilles."

CONUNDRUM.

(Perpetrated at the Private Theatricals, 1868.)

" Why is the Drawing Academy like a Christmas box ?"
. " Because you see ' Weir' [we're] always there.'

244 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

YE SPOONEY MAN'S LAMENT.

AIR. Fiying Trapeze.

Sung by Cadet "Bay Borgur" at the Theatrical Entertainment New Year's

Eve, '08.

CANTO I.
" In which he bewaileth the fickleness of his fair charmer."

Oh ! once I was spooney, as spooney could be,
Enslaving all hearts erst so happy and free,
But faithless the fair one who doted on me,

Enchained by a rival I hate.
She said she would die, her affection to prove,
I vowed everlasting, my love,
She called on the earth and the blue vault above

To witness her constancy great.

CHORUS.

" In which he enlargeth upon the attraction of chevrons, dancing, and the gift

of gab."

He'd glide through the dance with an air fill of grace,
His form tall and dapper, exquisite his face,
His glibness and chevrons of shining gold lace,
Have captured the heart of my " spoons."

CANTO II.

"In which, trade in bell-buttons and ribbons doth prosper."
Ah ! then to the Hops this vampire did come,
So sleek, and of hair-oil distilling perfume,
He gazed at my spoons, as she entered the room,

Her constancy fled like a dream.
Old gloves, fans, and roses, and bell-buttons too,
They'd trade, and they'd send billet-doux,
He'd flaunt at his button, a ribbon of blue,
Of impudence he was the cream.

CHORUS.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

CANTO III.

Which hints at ' foul play,' or the disappearance of fowls to that bourne whence
no fowls return also toucheth upon his feelings ou observing said disappear-
ance. "

She'd send to the Guard-tent, a jelly of fowl,
He'd gobble it up, and for more he would growl,
He looked like an angel, but ate like a ghoul,
He'd fill himself when he'd a chance.

I 'gan for the blood of my rival to crave,
To gain her I'd work like a slave,
Or desolate sink in an untimely grave,
And will to a Plebe my white pants.

CHORUS.

-I.*

CANTO IV.

which he reverteth to his feelings, on being cut at the Hop by his cruel
deceiver.

I went to the Hop, for I knew she'd be there,
I dressed in my best with the greatest of care,
She came; and sure never was being so fair,

She smiled as I joined in the dance.
Alas ! for the rest I remember too well
It harrows my feelings to tell,
Shame ! agony ! rage ! all my bosom did swell,

I ne'er shall forget her cold glance.

CHORUS.

CANTO V.

'The tragedy. He forgetteth that people sometimes have corns. Also niaketh
an original remark on the heat of the evening."

I trod on her dress, and destroyed yards of lace,
I said " A warm evening," she laughed in my face,
I tripped o'er her toes, and oh ! matchless disgrace !
I dragged h<-r along in my fall.

nnmered "An accident, will you forgive?"
She said " You are drunk, as I live !
You'd better go home, or t-lsr Irani to behave,

YOU'JV only disgracing us all! "

CHOEU&

246 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

CANTO VI.

" Desperation of the Cadet. Considereth he had better go to bed. He alloweth
another to stand in his shoes."

I rushed from the room, but looked back as I fled,

He was whispering soft, while she hung down her head,

I hurried to Camp and went straight to my bed,

I knew that she laughed in her sleeve.
In dreams I was racked by the pangs of despair,
With morning I banished all care ;
My Hop-shoes and gloves now another doth wear,

I-never have danced since that eve.

CHORUS.

MORAL.
[Xot sung.~\

With chevrons and brass, much your charms you'll enhance,
Don't go to the Hop-room unless you can dance,
If you cannot talk nonsense, Lord pity your chance,
They'll think you are drunk as a fool.

[A warning to all youths afflicted with the Divine afflatus, not to " run a light
after Taps " in order to write poetry. If you are discovered it will give "three
extras," as I can testify from experience, having been "hived" while writing
this]

Don't sit up too late, e'en a poem to write,
The gas is not good, and you'll damage your sight,
It may pay to compose, but it won't re-pay quite,
For " Extras for light after Taps."

-BOOK.

247

jj *

ffirand fatertainment,

TO KK GIVK.V AT THE

ACADEMIC BUILDING, WEST J D OINT, N. J.

PART I.

1. OPENING CHORUS" The Elephant now goes 'round" WHOLE BOARD.

2. BALLVD "Jerusalem, my happy home" MAUD DEKH.

3. BANJO SOLO" Hunkey, Dinkey, Darby Ram" PHRENSH.

4-. SPANISH DANCE DISH ANNOX.

5. SONG " Cruiskeen Lawn" PETE CHCB.

(Th PQard will now be divided.)

PART II.

CLOG DANCE " Jtiba" WE ERR.

(1'rof. Wrench will pat for the "julm.')

SONG" To make me a chemist, my purients did try" KENT RICKS.

SPARRING MATCH (Li^lit Wri^his) DEN KNEE and BAR TELLET.

SOLO" Whiskey punch is a very good thing" BLACQUE.

-'NG "Soluble" "hardly !" Low RAIN.

Prof. CHER. ERTCH will indulge in a " Demonstration" towards ANN YELL, who,

being ;i linguist, will give him a '"motion of translation."
WALK AROUND AND SET-TO. . . . . WHOLE BOARD.

248 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK

BUTTONS ON THE BRAIN.

By BonnybeL

'Twas night in the Highlands;

No sound could be heard,
But the sweet, drowsy twitter

Of some dreaming biid.
God had placed in the heavens

His glorious lamp,
And her rays in their beauty

Shone soft o'er the camp,

Where deep silence brooded,

Except for the sound
Of the sentinel's tread

On his wearisome round,
And his hourly call,

Which on our ears fell
"Number One ! two o'clock;

All's well! All is well!"

The echoes awakened,

Far over the hill,
Took up the sweet words,

And repeated them still;
For what could disturbance

So peacefully quell,
As that call in the midnight,

"All's well! All is well!"

But hark ! in the distance,
What sounds do we hear ?

Strange jingling and discord,
That grates on the ear;

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

"While fast o'er the plain,
"With a rush and a whirl,

That left us quite breathless,
There came a young girl.

Bell-buttons were strung

All over her dress,
Bell-buttons adorned

Each fair golden tress;
A string of them hung

From her round arms so white,
And encircled her neck

"With their glitter so bright.

She stood there before us

Like some elfin fay,
And we waited in silence

For what she would say;
While she jingled her buttons

In evident pain,
And they jingled in time

To her mournful refrain:

" Know, all you cadets

"Who heartlessly sleep,
"While I my lone vigils

Unceasingly keep,
I'm the sprite of your buttons,

That glitter so gay,
Big buttons have stolen

MY reason away.

" And when one is taken
With buttons on brain,

No earthly physician
Can restore them again.

249

250 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Now listen awhile,

As one after one,
My buttons all tell you

The mischief they've done."

She paused; and we listened

To each tale so sad,
That had ended in driving

This fair maiden mad.
Some on flirtation

Were given away,
While strolling along

In the twilight gray;

And some in the spoony room

Were tenderly given,
With glances and sighings

That made earth a heaven;
While the lights burn blue,

And our hearts all thrill,
At low-murmured words,

Though meaningless still.

Hand-claspings, low-whispered

Vows still to be true,
When the cadet shall have doffed

The grey for the blue;
And the moon looking in

Makes a holier day,
And illumines the room

With her silvery ray.

A sound of a cannon !

" Why ! is this a dream ? "
I looked wildly around me

No maid to be seen;

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

While musing repentant,

I vowed ne'er again
To be the sad cause

Of buttons on brain.

A voice broke the silence :

c Just -wait till I see
Where Cadet Blank is,

Or where he should be."
And round the tent corner

Of Company A,
' Shoo-fly " bolted in

With the dawn of the day.

NOTE.- "Shoo-fly" is a name given one of the officers; a universal favorite in
>ite of his cognomen.

YOU AND I.

We walked together down " Flirtation,"

You and I, that summer day;
The birds in the branches above us sung,
And our voices in merry laughter rung,

We were as joyous as they.

We talked together on " Flirtation,"

You and I, that summer day;
With mirth on our lips and gladness at heart,
The coming fate that would hold us apart

Casts no shadow in our way

We sat together on " Flirtation,"

You and I that summer clay;
While the south wind wooed the tall tree-tops,
And the river murmurtd by the rocks,

Were we less glad than they ?

252 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

We lingered together on " Flirtation,"

You and I that summer day,
Until the beautiful day was dead,
And the sunset glories amber and red

Paled to a sombre gray.

"We parted sadly on "Flirtation,"
You and I in the twilight gray,
Lips clung to lips in a mute farewell,
And I knew the light had faded as well
From my life as from the day.

The lesson I learned upon " Flirtation,"
Darling ! from you that summer day,
I've not forgotten this weary while,
And I still repeat, with a tearful smile,
The words you taught me to say:

" We will sit together on ' Flirtation/

Another, brighter summer day,
The river will always murmur its song,
And the soft wind whisper the boughs among,
And I will be true as they."

" So Jam waiting upon " Flirtation,"
For you to come some summer day,
The river does murmur the same sweet tune,
The trees are kissed by the breezes of June,
Will you be less true than they ?

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

253

OLD BENTZ THE BUGLER.

And lo! I heard a bugle sounding, ami behold! a sma]l
nmnhcr of men in gaudy raiment appeared, and straight-
w iv they turned their eyes eastward, and the angel
whisppivd - " Thrx- aiv they who are the Second Section,
and they go forth unto the ' fession/" and then the bugle
d. and tliev inarched on to the eastward, singing:

Oh! once we "fessed coldly" the whole hour through,
And "Old Snifty" raved, while Kensel looked blue,
Hut nary a problem could we go through,

Try it as much ;is we choose.
\V, ',r;ui for " Old Snifty " to cultivate hate,

And reckless in "Descriptive " we grew;

254 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

We cared not a curse for June and our fate,
Though he thought that we shook in our shoes.

CHORUS.

Oh ! we " fessed " through the stuff with the greatest of grace,
With its " lines," and " projections," and " points," on the trace,
"Broken" or " dotted," or "full" as you face,
They have made spider-webs of our brains.

SOME OF THOSE BRIGHT IMMORTAL SOULS THAT WERE
NOT BORN TO DIE.

AIR Captain Jinks.

The Supe am I, " Oughld Jenner Alpie"

With " extras " I am somewhat free,

" Confinements," too, I think to be

Good training for the Army.

When weighty matters do befall,

Do befall do befall,

Full well / think nor act at all,

'Tis a way we have in the Army.

My name's well known, 'tis Profmai Han,

Cadets I " find " whene'er I can,

I think it is the safest plan

To keep them from the Army.

Boorish Americans are they all,

Are they all are they all,

" They don't do so in France at all,

" They work for the good of the Army."

Old Barte Let, I, a wizard dread,
Full of " conundrums" strange, my head;
I cause an "Impact" when I tread,
And " culminations " charm me

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Your " tnppeny Math." I do despise,

Do despise do despise,

In " Azimuth " I roll my eyes,

I teach for the good of the Army.

Old Sniff Tea, I, and all in vain,

The cadets of my "Math." complain,

I'm short and pussy, cross, and fain

Would keep them from the Army.

Study they won't, and they'll all be " found,"

All be found all be found,

I'll see them safely homeward bound,

But they shan't get into the Army.

Old Hanks, my name, a chemist, I

Teach also of Geology ;

The cadets much my patience try,

Their answers wild alarm me.

" Ah ! very good /" we'll put them through,

Put them through put them through,

And if we chance to " find " a few,

*Tis all for the good of the Army.

I'm Pop Pea Phrensh, as you'll perceive,

Gothic, thouyh Sajron, I believe,

My " Goose-tracks" did the cadets grieve,

I'm Chaplain in the Army.

All the things that mundane are,

Mundane are mundane are,

Sprang at first from the " Stem Root Var,"

And this I impress on the Army.

286

I, Krrr Knell Jilwjw, command the Corps
I sometimes show cuoYts my door,
And bid them use it too, before
I oust them from the Army.

256 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

I drill them daily on the plain,
On the plain on the plain,
I'll turn them upside down again,
Before they get into the Army.

Old Dadigan, I, of Company " K,"

I " skin" in quite a playful way,

Your "cap-string" you must keep out of the way,

If you would gain the Army.

I chase cadets all through the hall,

Through the hall through the hall,

Be careful ! or I'll tell you all,

You'll never get into the Army.

I'm Jay Keekay of Company " E,"

Into your clothes-bag I will see,

There's nothing can be hid from me,

Because I'm in the Army.

I'm five feet high, but a huge- man I,

Huge man I huge man I,

I early took to the trade of spy,

When first I went into the Army.

I'm Sand Dee.see, a rider gay,

A handsome fellow, so they say,

I'm young and peevish in my way,

Too early in the Army.

The " yearlings" admire me when I ride,

When I ride when I ride,

I've loved my shadow by my side,

Since first I went into the Army.

I'm Jah Kee Aitch, of Company " G,"
A " spooney man," as you may see,
But thinking is too much for me,
Although I'm in the Army.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 25'

I sit in my teut, and smoke and rock,
Smoke and rock smoke and rock,
Of brains, I have but little stock,
For an officer in the Army.

Re-Act-Shuns is niy family name,

I thrive on " chlorine, smoke and flame,"

To be " insoluble" I claim,

N> noxious drug can harm me;

Strange creatures wait my beck and call,

Beck and call beck and call,

AVith " Hi-hHrter," chief and head of all,

My bidding to do for the Army.

I'm Jay Seead Dunis, Engineer,
The greatest man that teaches here,
I fill cadets with mortal fear,
I'm Captain in the Army.
Dignity high is enshrined in me,
Enshrined in me enshrined in me,
Caustic, my speech, as speech can be,
I'm wiser than all of the Army.

Honest Old Brawjhte, it is my name,
And swindling cadets is my game;
Redress for this they cannot claim,
They're not yet in the Army.
I feed them just the s ime as of yore,
Sann 1 aa <>t y>re same as of yore,
I'll raise their board ten dollars more,
Before they get into the Army.

MORAL.

Lives of great men all remind us,

We may make our lives sublime,
And departing, leave behind us,

t-prints on the sands of time.

258 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Foot-prints, that perhaps another
Sailing o'er life's solemn main,

A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,
Seeing, may take heart again.

THE BEAUTIES OF THE DEMERIT SYSTEM.

[Taken from " Cadet Life at West Point," a volume written by a late Officer of the

Regular Army ]

I will devote a few pages to whatever may suggest
itself on the subject of the Demerit system and my
experience thereunder.

The principal of the punishments to which cadets are
liable, are expulsion, suspension for one year, extra guard
duty, confinement to quarters, and to light or dark prison.
But the more immediate penalty is the demerit, a certain
number of which are entailed by each reported and unex-
plained violation of the regulations. In my day [1854]
two hundred was the limit for an entire year ; this limit
passed, the result was dismissal. A recent regulation
which makes the limit one hundred for six months, has
essentially changed and improved the former. The num-
ber registered against a cadet for any particular offence
depends upon the nature of the offence its grade. If,
for instance, it be disobedience of orders, mutinous con-
duct, sitting or lying down while on post as sentinel, these
being among the most serious of military offences, he
finds opposite the charge in the Black Book at the Adju-
tant's office, a registration of eight or ten demerit. For

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

259

trifling in ranks at panulo, or elsewhere, perhaps half that
iiumber ; while a single one is the penalty of a " late " or
an unbuttoned coat. The aggregate of these decides his
standing on the conduct-roll at the end of the year, or at
graduation, when the class rank is determined. As much
importance is given to this subject, in the determination

BUTTERMILK FALLS.

of the graduating rank, as to one of the most important
branches of study mathematics, natural and experi-
mental philosophy, or engineering.

Tin- various ollences, moral or military, committed each
day, whether noticed by the cadet officers whose duty for
the time being may compel them to report the offender,
or by officers of the armv, are all transcribed in the de-
linquency book (the most interesting object ever shown

260 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

to visitors at the Point), and published to the battalion,
after parade, on the evening of the following day. The
excuse for an offence, if the delinquent has any, and in
some cases when he has not, is presented, in writing, ac-
cording to a prescribed form, to the Commandant.
Should he deny its validity, an appeal lies to the Super-
intendent, and, in extreme cases, to the Secretary of War.
If the report is not removed, it is finally "registered,' 7
and the number of demerit corresponding to its grade is
placed opposite, as heretofore explained. Should the
importance of the offence seem to merit further punish-
ment, it is inflicted by order of the Superintendent.

I have preserved, and will produce from my diary, a
list of the delinquents, and their offences, published one
evening soon after we had gone into winter-quarters.
The visitor to West Point can hear this evening, and
every evening until the dissolution of the Union, the same
formula of delinquencies published with little variation.
But these same names, or most of them, have passed away,
and the Military Academy will know them, alas ! no more
forever. No more popular speaker ever addressed an
American audience than our Cadet Adjutant if the un-
divided attention of his listeners were any criterion
when enumerating our military faults. His clear, shrill
voice is still ringing in my ears, and two hundred and
twenty armed men were incorporeally suspended from his
lips as he said

"DELINQUENCIES FOR TH SEPTEMBER, 18 ."
Bender: Inattention at drill, P.M.
Same : Laughing in ranks at same.

WEST POIN'T SCRAP-BOOK.

201

down while on

ft : Highly unsoldier-like conduct, sitting

post as sentinel, 9.20 P.M.
Coat unbuttoned, and hat off at same.
S(imr Book in possession at same.

Orderly, allowing loud talking in quarters after Taps.
e: Ungeutlemanly conduct, throwing a piece of bread at

another cadet in mess-hall at supper.
r: Neglect of duty as file-closer; not reporting files for

talking in ranks at parade.
er: Bottle of liquor in possession, 11 and 12 P.M.

) light in quarters at inspection by sentinel, 7 P.M.
Collar not neatly put on, and belts dirty at inspection of

guard.
e : Shoes not properly blacked at same.

: Wash-bowl not inverted at morning inspection.
"]T : Cap out of uniform at parade of riding platoon.
('n< !<:- Absent from quarters without leave, and more than half

an hour, 7 and 8 P.M.

: Neglect of mathematical studies on 2d.
: The same in French on the 3d.
:- ( )ut of uniform, wearing a standing collar, 8 A.M.
If'tjijM'r: Losing step, and thereby creating confusion in ranks,

marching in from parade.
'ii/iii'-: -Pipe- in possession, 8J, A.M.

Liit'-r .--Not keeping dressed while marching in review at guard-
mounting.

W: Marching at double quick time, without command, re-
turning from Academy, ',} P.M.

Not keeping eyes to the front at breakfast roll-call.
'i/ur/ir .- Hair too long at inspection, A.M.
Not neatly shaved at same.

Talking in ranks while marching from dinner.
l">ing profane language in area of barracks, 7.-">0 A.M.
: Positive and wilful disobedience of orders, not taking
medicine prescribed by the surgeon.

262 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Ranlcanfile : Visiting, 11J A.M.

Same: Unsoldier-like conduct, concealing himself in the fire-
place to evade the officer of the day at same.

Tombey : Gross carelessness, dropping his musket at drill.

Trim : Corporal of the guard not answering promptly the call of
sentinel No. 4, while battalion was at dinner.

Westcott : Out of quarters with coat unbuttoned, 11 and 12 A.M.

Zerot : Neglect of French studies on 3d.

To review some of these offences, for which, or similar
ones, we were, some of us, every day reported, we perceive
that Cadet Bonnet is, indeed, in trouble, for there's evi-
dently no excuse for h}m.

The plea of sickness or exhaustion will be unavailing,
since, in that case, he could have called the corporal, been
relieved from duty, and gone to the hospital.

He will be favored with a liberal number of demerit for
each of the three reports, and will have a comfortable
time of it, if he has a taste for that kind of exercise, in
walking extra L ' Saturdays " for the next three months.
Mr. Knickotine will lose his splendid meerschaum, get
half a dozen demerit, and perhaps two "Sundays." Mr.
Congee, as he is a cadet-officer, will be punished, besides
receiving six or eight demerit, by having his chevrons
taken off. He will go into ranks again as a private, much
to the secret satisfaction perhaps of those, myself included,
toward whom he has heretofore done his military duty
rather too well. But we of the Fourth Class had been in
the habit of looking up to officers of the First Class with
that degree of awe and veneration, that we thought it
sacrilege to see him sent into ranks side by side with us.
and the sleeves of his coat as bare of gold lace as ours.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

263

It is to be hoped that Cadet Pillsbury will show in his
excuse some palliating circumstances; for, otherwise, it
wil! require stronger medicine than that lie threw away,
to save him. Physicians in civil life are not generally
over-indulgent under circumstances like these, and it is too
much to expect that an army surgeon, whose prescription
was back CM] by all the military power of the Government,
would write a favorable and relenting endorsement on
Pillsbury 's excuse, whatever it might be. This case, as
good luck would have it, turned out to be one not for a
military tribunal, but for casuists.

After P.. being interrogated, had confessed to the sur-
geon that he had not taken the medicine (a couple of
powders, nothing more nor less), and had been reported
for it. his room-mate quietly informed him of the mistake
he was laboring under, for he had unknowingly taken
them as the victim of a practical joke played by inform-
ant. The medicine was doing its duty on the digestive
organs of the accused, even though against his will, and,
under those circumstances, what was to be his punishment
for not taking it?

The Attorney-General has not yet decided, and P., in
the meantime, escaped unscathed, and has never suffered
:Voin the dyspepsia since.

Mr, Huttler -there's no hope for him. He was caught
just as he was creeping up-stairs on his return from
" Penny's." and was ordered in arrest on the spot. Ill-
will be tried by a court-martial, and as the proof is con-
clusive, and the regulations on this point very explicit and
otherwise similar to those of the Medes and Persians, will

264 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

be dismissed. The punishments of the others will be
lighter. These, my predictions, all proved correct, as the
archives of the institution will show, except in the case of
Cadet Buttler, where I was much too fast. It appeared
afterward that Buttler had entertained a hearty antipathy
against the officer who commanded that company, and
sought some method of annoying him ; which, by the way,
was rather an unequal game. He lived with a cadet-
officer, and they were permitted to have a light after
Taps.

It was between eleven and twelve o'clock on the night
in question, and they had not yet retired, when the still
night-inspection was faintly heard on the lower floor.
Buttler had a junk bottle full of oxalic acid that he used
for cleaning his cap trimmings. He immediately threw
on his overcoat and forage-cap, ran out into the hall and
made a slight noise on the stairs as of one stealthity and
hastily ascending, and then returned to the room and
seized the bottle. The officer's ready ear had detected the
noise, and he immediately passed by two of the rooms on
the second floor and ran up the next flight of stairs. When
he opened Buttler's door, the room-mate of the latter was
just in the act of setting two tumblers upon the table,
while Buttler himself was drawing the cork, being still in
cap and overcoat. Their apparent consternation at this
sudden interruption was perfect, and so too was the air of
triumphant severity with which the officer remarked that
Mr. Buttler might consider himself in arrest, and then
walked out taking along the bottle of acid. It so hap-
pened that the officer was to ; be absent during the entire

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

i 'lay. ;m<l as he now had but a short night, at best, for
p. IK.' went to bed without once thinking a lasting
monument to his sobriety to examine the contents of the
bottle. The next morning he sent in a report of what he
done to the Commandant, and departed; and it was not
until after his. return, on the following evening, when the
r-'port had been already published, that he tested the
value of his pri/e.

There was at the time of this seizure another cadet eon-
led in the room, audit finally turned out that Buttler's
sudden expedient was not, after all, an entirely extem-
poraneous affair, and that his dislike to the inspecting
< ITieer had not been his only motive. The occupant of
the room directly beneath had run the risk of paying his
fi-iends overhead a nocturnal visit, and they had just been
iissing the probabilities of an inspection when the foot-
steps were heard in the hall below. They had already,
though only half in earnest, mentioned the possibility of
diverting the officer's attention by stratagem, should he
have progressed so far in his inspection before being heard,
that the visitor could not safely return to his room ere the
inspector approached it.

The plan they had named worked charmingly. For- the
officer, now that he was on the third lloor, completed the
inspection of that, as well as the fourth, before he returned
to inspect the two rooms he had omitted on the second.
"When the way was all clear the delinquent crept back to
his quarters, and when the officer returned thither, was in
V>d and in a wonderfully profound slumber.

there La something in that list of delinquencies that

2G6 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

refers pointedly to the writer of this article (Rank an file),
lie was not a wholly disinterested listener to their publica-
tion. I was not taken at all by surprise when the first
report was read, but had not anticipated the second. For,
however remote from pride may have been my feelings
when detected in that hiding-place with my head up the
chimney, I did not imagine it would be deemed dishonor-
able to attempt the avoidance of the enemy by such dis-
cretion. My ears were regaled with the expression of the
Superintendent's opinion on this subject, when, at the end
of the following week the " list of cadets for punishment"
was published, and a handsome compliment was paid to
Cadet Rankanfile's trustworthy vigilance as a sentinel, he
being assigned to a much greater amount of guard duty
than fell to the lot of those cadets who were less reliable
in that important duty. At the time of the offence I had
stepped for a moment into another room on the same floor
with my own, and occupied by a class-mate, when I heard
the rattle of the officer of the day's sword as he ascended
the stairs. The standing fire-board, which was required
to lie flat on the hearth, and the evident confusion of my
friend, betrayed me. *

I will close this discus-
sion with a reference to the effect this subject of demerit
is made to have in the determination of the class-rank of
graduates.

The final arrangement of the graduating class in order
of general merit is determined by a careful and accurate
consideration of relative proficiency in all the studies of
the entire course as well as their deportment, both moral

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 267

and military, during their series of years. These studies
have a relative value in this computation; as. for instance,
engineering, philosophy, or mathematics, count three each
in the scale, wherein chemistry, ethics, or infantry tactics,
count one and a half, while French, drawing, geology, A<-..
count but one. But the point I am now aiming at is, that
the graduating merit in conduct is determined from the
demerit list as I have explained it, and is not only made
equal in value to the highest branch of study, but, as it
extends through the whole course, it is in reality worth
more to him who shows a good account therein than the
most important of them all. I shall not attempt to show
tnat there can be more than one opinion on the subject of
good conduct, as the expression is generally understood,
or that any excellence, however splendid, in scientific
attainments, can compensate for a blemish here. But
when we reflect that the moral deportment of a cadet
may be unexceptionable, and still, from a recurrence of
some of the most important reports I have enumerated,
his demerit list may be swelled beyond the limits of a
"good conduct" roll; when we reflect, I say, that such
tin one must make room, in the final assignment to duty,
for one who is much his inferior in natural capacity and
academic excellence, but who is more fortunate in the

tther particular, it seems that these things are susceptible
)f a change " without manifest injury to the service^
A late President of the United States once said, while
n oflice, that the fact of an unlucky spot being found on
lie white trousers of a cadet who has a good capacity.
vill hardly affect his efficiency in building a fortification,

268 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

testing a piece of ordnance, or charging the enemy in
battle. True, these offences, the spotted trousers, the
soiled gloves, the confused police of room, the levity
while on duty, can none of them be overlooked. Perfect
discipline and the formation of precise habits of order
require that they be punished; but must such delinquency
be necessarily charged to the account of the intellect ?

However, older men than I have, by indefatigable
industry, and under the authority of the War Depart-
ment, brought this whole system of instruction to its
present degree of perfection. It is for such rather than
for me to suggest the means of obviating this imperfec-
tion, should they acknowledge it to be such.

The present is said to be the most effectual method of
punishing carelessness and keeping the cadet's attention
fixed on the final object to be obtained by the long and
arduous course. I shall not advise, for it would embar-
rass me to think that the War Department or the
Military Academy were coming to these pages to seek
counsel, but will here record one of many suggestions
that have from time to time been made in connection
with this subject. It is to make some local and imme-
diate disadvantages the penalty of every ten or twenty
demerit received, and to fix the semi-annual limit at such
a number that, by a sufficiently strict attention to duty on
the part of the cadet, and a careful examination by the
authorities of each registered report, the limit need not
be passed. Let it be perfectly understood (perhaps such
is the case at present) in the corps that the penalty of
exceeding that number is expulsion without hope of favor

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

269

a prompt and irrevocable expulsion. The effect of
moral or military misconduct going no farther, in the day
of diploma presentation, genius would take its accustomed
seat. Thus would he whose attainments were greatest be
rewarded by an assignment to congenial duties where
close mental application is the business of the day, while
a lother less studiously inclined would be employed on
more active service.

THE DAILY ROUTINE.

To explain the daily routine we had now commenced,
VAV will start with a wild spring from a sound slumber, five
o'clock A.M., at the summons of the morning gun, and the
simultaneous tap of the drums, that calls us to the reveille
roll-call

About six minutes intervene between the time the
music begins and its ceasing, which latter is the signal for
the already-formed companies to be called to Attention,
when all must bo in ranks or at their posts. The roll-call
occupies but one or two minutes, as the orderly sergeant
of ea.-h company has committed to memory the list of
names, so as to be able thus quickly to run through it.
Practice has already accustomed him to notice, in the
meantime, all lates, absences, and every violation of mili-
tary decorum, and to observe whether the other non-com-
iniioned olliccrs in the line of file-closers behind the
company do their duty in reporting such delinquencies.
Adequate means are also employed to prevent the possi-
bility of one cadet answering to the name of another who
:nay be absent. The result is transmitted through the

270 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

four captains respectively, and the cadet-adjutant to the
officer of the day, who seeks the absentees, if there are
any such. (The latter officer, at the end of his twenty-four
hours' tour of duty, certifies in writing to the Commandant,
that he has faithfully discharged all the duties of his office,
as prescribed by the " Military Academy Regulations.")
At half-past five, the cadet captains and lieutenants make
an inspection of the rooms in their respective subdivisions.
The police of each room must then have been completed,
and everything in order. As the regulations prohibit any
cadet from having " a waiter, horse, or dog," they must
themselves perform all the sweeping, folding of bedding,
etc. Nothing now interrupts study until the drum for
breakfast roll-call at seven, except the surgeon's call,
beaten at half-past six, when those who are sick repair to
the hospital to receive their requisite medical attendance,
arid to be excused by the surgeon from the performance of
such academic or military duty as they are, by reason of
such sickness, incompetent to perform.

After the breakfast roll-call, the battalion is marched by
the senior cadet-captain, in column of platoons or com-
panies, to the mess-hall, whence it returns after the lapse
of about twenty-five minutes. Guard-mounting occupies
the time from half-past seven till eight o'clock, which is a
season of recreation to those who are neither tl marching
on " guard, nor "marching off." At eight, the bugle calls
to quarters, from which there is no " release " for five
hours. All those sections of every class that recite at this
hour now assemble at the class-parade, where the rolls are
called under the direction of the new officer of the day j

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

271

and they are marched to the recitation rooms by the sec-
tion marchers, who report to the Instructor, as they have
already have done to the officer of the day, the result of
tin* roll-call. At half-past nine the bugle recalls these,
and summons the other half of the entire corps to the
class-parade. These return at eleven, and then the reci-
tations in all the most important studies are finished for
the day. The signal for dinner roll-call is beaten at one
P.M., and an hour is allowed for dinner and recreation.
At two the recitations begin again, arid at four the acade-
mic building is deserted. The recitations from eleven to
one, and from two to four, being less important, only
occupy an hour each. There is now a long release from
c uarters ; a drill occupies about one and a-half hours, a
season of recreation ensues, and dress-parade takes place
at sun-down. Supper succeeds, which being followed by
thirty minutes of recreation, the bugle again calls to quar-
ters and study. Tattoo is beaten at half-past nine, and at
ten the taps, when the beds having been spread since
tattoo lights are extinguished and all cadets in bed,
<>pt the cadet officers who inspect the rooms to see that
this regulation has been promptly observed.

The guard, being of the same strength, and divided into
the same number of reliefs as when in camp, walk post
only while the battalion is absent at meals, drill, or
parade, and during the hours of evening study. Each
sentinel makes an inspection of all the rooms on his post,
and is held responsible for all noise and absence from
quarters of those who are under his temporary supervision.
This daily routine varies in no important particular during

272 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

the academic year, but the studies of each class as they
are successively finished are exchanged for others. Other
military exercises at certain seasons of the year take the
place of infantry drill, and during the winter there is no
drill at all except the cavalry exercise in the riding-hall
in study hours. The hour for retiring is, while in Bar-
racks, always the same; but reveille sounds at half-past five
during the months of March and October, and at six during
the winter months and November. The recitations in the
section-room are conducted with the same degree of for-
mality and precision that characterizes the other duties of
the day, but not to the prejudice of an unrestrained inter-
change of opinions between the Instructor and the cadet ,
on all the points of the subject under consideration. After
the report of the section-marcher, and when each has
taken the particular seat that belongs him, a number of
cadets, say four or five, are successively sent to the black-
board. Each, as he is called, takes his place in the centre
of the floor, faces the Instructor, assumes the position of
the soldier, receives the enunciation of his proposition,
and then, turning to the black-board, writes his name at
the top, and begins his work. While they are thus occu-
pied with the chalk, another is called upon the floor, and
questioned in the lesson of this or the previous day. This
one is, on the succeeding days, called on " demonstra-
tion," and not again on "questions," until every other
member has been, in like manner, questioned.

Each of those at the board, when ready, takes the
pointing-stick, faces about, and stands erect, holding the
pointer in the hand nearest the board. When called upon

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 273

o recite, he states what he is required to do, and pro-
ceeds to the demonstration, or declares his inability to
1 id-form it, in which latter case he is rewarded with a

' That's sufficient, sir," and makes room for another. The
merit of each recitation is registered in accordance with a
seale of marks ranging from zero, in the case of total fail-
ure, to three, which is the maximum.

So accurately is this record intended to be kept, that it
varies by single tenths with every shade of error. The
marks for each week are posted, on the following Monday,
in a conspicuous place where they can be seen by all con-
cerned.

It is from the average of these marks, combined with
his success at the examination, that the standing of each
cadet in January or June is determined.

SOME RECOLLECTIONS OF BENNY 8.

mny Haven's, Oh ! " has been so long an important
adjunct of the other important institutions of West Point,
that the memory of any young man runneth not to the
contrary. The proprietor of this Ikfle retreat, and after
whom it was named, was once established within the Gov-
ernment lines where fora longtime he dispensed his good
< heer of flip and buckwheat cakes in comparative secrecy.
But a relentless Abstraction drove him at last from the
public limits, and from what had been to the reckless and
the daring of the earlier cadets, classic ground : and with
heavy heart he left the ideal protection of the Stars and
Stripes behind him, and pitched his tent in the tame and un-

274 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

romantic security of a private domain. And there even unto
this day sits the old man under his humble roof down by
the water's edge and beneath a rugged cliff a mile below
the Point, mourning those days of chivalry when his
poetic name was the soul of song, and the toast of twenty
gallant knights that sat at his midnight board. But even
unto this day his hermitage is not a social desert, though
the barriers between it and the barrack-prison have been
made too strong, by more modern discipline, to be passed
by any save the most daring.

For from the councils of both war and State have come,
and are coming, back in frequent succession the bravest and
wisest, gray-haired veterans making a last pilgrimage to
Benny's sylvan shrine. He recognizes their every feature
and quotes from every page of their cadet history, and
decks the entertainment with the vintage of a century
gone.

It was a bitter cold night in the holidays that were clos-
ing the old year, and we sat around the fire that crackled
its merriest Christmas carol on Benny's hearth. It was
nearly eleven o'clock, and Nod (my room-mate) and I had
just arrived ; the other five of the party having preceded
us by a few minutes. We were confident of there being
no night inspection, and had left our rooms soon after the
" all in " at Taps. The flow of old and holiday wine, the
still more genial flow of Benny's paternal soul, and withal
the audible and welcoming somersaults of the buckwheats,
punctual to the hour, preparing in the next apartment,
bade avaunt to the hobgoblin of discipline.

WEST POIXT SCRAP-BOOK. 275

" Fill up," says Ned, " fill up and" (the signal for every voice)

" Stand up in a row,

" For sentimental drinking we're going for to go,
In the army there's sobriety, promotion 's very slow,
So we'll cheer our hearts with choruses at Benny Havens, Oh ! "
* * * * CHORUS * *

********

" There comes a voice from Florida, from Tampa's lonely shore,
It is the wail of gallant men, O'Brien is no more;
In the land of sun and flowers, his head lies pillowed low,
No more to sing petite coquille at Benny Havens, Oh ! "

This last verse was sung with due solemnity
and all uncovered. Our host, with that same pipe whose
stem was proportionally as short as himself, and one of
the invariable emblems of his identity, contracted that
horizontally expansive countenance, that always appeared
to have just made a treaty of peace with all mankind in
general, and all reckless cadets in particular, into a pre-
ponderance of vertical dimension, drawn downward by a
sincerely heavy heart, as he listened to this affecting tri-
bute to the memory of one whose virtues he knew so well.
\Ve pithered around him and listened to a new edition of
the stories of other days an ample store, to which the
events of each year have added a long supplement. Before
our little group had again relapsed into mirth under the
influence of wine, tradition, and song, the gravity of the
older offenders of the party, to our shame be it said, was
not imfrecjuently disturbed by the nervousness of Cadet
E fourth-daw man. who had never until to-night

even crossed the prescribed limit, and much less ventured
so far from duty as now. In spite of his assumed gayety,

276 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

what would poor E - not have given to have been even
now studying his mathematics in his own quiet room, as
he had never studied before. As he sat among us and
strove manfully to appear as much at ease as the rest, we
enjoyed not a little diversion in watching him as he
involuntarily started at every sound from the interior
apartment and every rustle without, imagining it the foot-
step of an officer.

After Benny had finished his half dozen cadet legends,
we resumed our song, the threescore stanzas of which,
when sung with a proper observance of the military
decorum which the sentiment and the place demanded,
always occupied an hour and a half more.

" May the Army be augmented, may promotion be less slow,
May our country in the hour of need be ready for the foe;
May we meet a soldier's resting-place beneath a soldier's blow,
And space enough beside our graves for "

"The devil and Tom Walker !" (if the reader would
know why Mr. Thomas Walker's name is so often lugged
into such uncomplimentary connection, I can only sym-
pathize in his curiosity without the ability of a satisfac-
tory explanation) cried a cadet of my own class, who, just
arriving, burst into the room, and without saying another
word, intimated by gestures alone that there was danger
brewing in our immediate vicinity.

" We are all dead men ! " cried the Plebe.

Benny, like an old veteran who had seen many years
of just such service as this, was as cool, lending a hand
here and there to " speed the parting guest/' as every old
soldier should be in the moment of hot action. My skates

WKST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

lay at my side, and I caught them up and ran to the ice.
And a truly military pair they were ; for every buckle
and strap, as if conscious of danger, flew to its place in a
moment, and almost before the sound of the first alarm
had died away, L was gliding, swift as the wind, up the
river 'alone. My room-mate, for the first time in his life,
was taken at a disadvantage ; for, as 1 learned afterwards,
his skates had been mislaid, and he was compelled to
follow without them.

The fourth-class man had not taken off his at all, think-
ing he would thus be better prepared for an emergency ;
but the ponderous articles struck some obstacle as he was
leaving the house, throwing him to the ground, and
before he could regain his feet he was recognized by the
two officers who had followed my class-mate down the
hill From ( ozzens'.

The others, except one, had come down by land, and,

ihe snow-crust was not strong enough to sustain one's
weiii-hl. they had followed the road, leaving it only at
such times as it seemed absolutely necessary. These left
bv path, and took to the woods in order to reach

the road by the shortest route and lose the least possible
time in reaching Barracks. For the first thought now
was, after eluding the vigilance of these officers, that the
latter would proceed immediately to the Point and state
the circumstances to those officers who were on duty at
the Barracks, when an inspection would reveal the
nteos.

When I arrived at Gee's Point, opposite the Barracks,
had occupied so little time in coming up. that should

278 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

our pursuers take horses at the Falls to forestall us by an
nspection, I was now in ample season to be in bed and
in safety. But I felt the greatest concern on account of
the others, and as it seemed to me that Ned (my room-
mate) would never be caught except by the inspection, I
tried a^ I ascended the hill to invent some expedient
whereby it might be delayed until hq and the others had
arrived.

There was a secret grotto, partly natural, partly arti-
ficial, near my path, known only to a few even of the
cadets, where contraband articles were sometimes de-
posited until a convenient opportunity was found of trans-
ferring them to Barracks. I lost now no time in visiting
it, and found a box which it proved had been placed
there by the t ' old pirate " for some cadet, but which one
I knew not. But I very readily concluded that this was
not the time to be over-punctilious in matters of etiquette,
since, whoever the owner might be, our interests were his
own ; so I knocked open the box, and removing all its
contents, laid them in a corner, with the exception of a
bottle, which I thought it necessary to sacrifice to the
public weal. After filling the box with rubbish, I nailed
it up again, and taking it, the bottle, and a piece of
candle from the cave, I started with all speed for the road
that skirted the crest of the hill and led to l ' the Falls
below.' 7

Selecting an eligible spot, I dropped my cap (after
tearing out my name from the lining) about two yards
from the road, and made tracks, as of one in haste, to the
shelter of a thicket and ledge of rocks near by. Having

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 279

lighted the candle and fixed it beyond the reach of the

I wind, and so that its light should be faintly but surely
discernible to anyone that might pass, and leaving near it
the box, marked in pencil " Cadet X Y //' I went a little
further and left the bottle of champagne on the snow.
Then, being unincurnbered, by means of trees and bare
rocks, I succeeded in getting back to the road without
making any return tracks in the snow.

How long this little ruse may have succeeded in delaying
the officers, I know not ; but every moment was precious,
ai id I had the consolation of finding out afterward that
they passed the guard about half an hour after I had stolen
by, bringing with them the cap and the bottle, and that a
servant was sent soon afterward for the box. I had hardly
reached my room when Ned arrived, covered with perspi-
ration in spite of the frost, and so breathless as for some
time to be unable to speak. We immediately detected
something wrong about the appearance of our room, for
my bed, as well as the floor, was covered with black spots,
apparently of ink. But we immediately retired, and lay
awake at least an hour awaiting the inspection.

Nothing was heard, however ; but at reveille, all our
companions of the previous night were placed in arrest,
and we expected that each succeeding moment would bring
with it an order to the same effect for us. The day wore
off, the evening publication of delinquencies took place,
and still our names did not appear, though the others
were reported for being absent from their quarters at
inspection after Taps ; and Cadet E , for being off
limits.

280 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

We had been told in the morning that inspections nad
been made in all the companies during the time we were
gone, and that the absence of all our companions had been
detected. Why not ours ? All were as much surprised
as ourselves at this miraculous escape. Our safety, how-
ever, was become a well-authenticated fact ; and the next
day but one, Ned, who was orderly of the room, having
been reported for having floor stained with ink, even wrote
an excuse, and successfully, stating that some time or
other, during the absence of us both, the ink had been
upset by an unknown^ person, and neither of us knew, or
could know anything about it. *

The reason that we were not " hived absent, 7 ' I did not
find out until two or three years afterward.

It seems that Tom (a class-mate and a very dear friend)
learned that there would be a night inspection, and know-
ing that we were both absent, deliberately made up his
mind to save us, even at the risk of being detected him-
self. So, after Taps, he went to our room, made a dummy,
which he put in Ned's bed, and was about to get into my
bed himself, when he reflected that his hair being very
light and mine being black, the officer would detect the
imposition, and on the spur of the moment, seized the ink-
stand and saturated his hair with the contents, which
acccounted for the ink stains on the floor. The ruse was
a success, and, fortunately, the inspecting officer went
through our division before he did Tom's, which gave him
time to clear out and reach his own room, wrap a towel
around his head, and retire before the officer came around.
Tom afterwards told me that he had a tough time of it,

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

the ink out of his hair, and for weeks after the
scrape, the cadets tormented him for using hair dye ; all of
r hich he bore good-naturedly without giving them any
satisfaction whatever.

WEST POINT.

Where proud and free the Hudson flows
Above the Highlands grand,

And in its placid bosom shows
The charms of Nature's hand

nil'RCH OF THE HOLY INNOC1

Enthroned upon the rugged breast
Of gently sloping hills,

IN >iiit, in re^il beauty dressed,
Smiles o'er the mountain rills.

Here, where the rippling, flowing tide
tlects the sunset's

282 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

And shadows on the mountain side

Weave oft a fairy dream ;
What mem'ries cluster 'round each hill,

" Gibraltar of our land ! "
Where " Cro ? Nest " and " Fort Putnam" still

In silent grandeur stand.

Historic spot ! made holy ground,

And consecrated land !
Where sacred records still abound,

Of Freedom's valiant band
Of heroes, freemen, soldiers brave,

Who, at their country's call
From tyrant's yoke of shame to save,

Gave freely life and all.

Where Washington ! and Lafayette,

Kosciuszko, Putnam, Howe,
With Knox, and Wayne, and Greene, have set

Their seal on honor's brow.

* * * * * . *

Where Arnold's treason filled mankind

With scorn for treachery ;
And Andre's fate to all his kind,

A warning e'er shall be.

How oft (as now) in by-gone years

Have youthful footsteps crossed
These well-worn paths while hopes and fears

Their souls in conflict tossed ;
How oft hath Love's divine control,

In sunny days of yore,
ThrilFd with a rapturous bliss some soul

That knew not love before.

Ambitious dreams, and yearning hope
Of honor and renown,

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

283

A future fair and bright could ope,
Uiidimmed by sorrow's frown.

*****

What recollections gather fast !

What visions wander by,
As down the vista of the past

We gaze with earnest eye.

Where now are all the forms so fair ?

The hearts that nurtured here,
Beneath their " Alina Mater's" care,

Passed out with hope or fear,
To share life's conflict, toil and pain,

To struggle in the race;
The moed of praise or fame to gain,

And fill a hero's place ?

Ah ! some have lain their armor down,

Their warfare quickly o*er;
Th3y wear, we trust, the victor's crown

Where strife can come no more.
Some on the dazzling mount of fame

Stand high, with record bright;
On honor's scroll engrave their name

In characters of light.

And some alas ! 'tis sad to think,
From honor turned away,

At treason's poisoned fount to drink;
And wandered far astray.

*****

Some scaling still the mountain high,

The golden prize to win ;
The conflict fierce, uml (lunger nigh,

But strength and hope within.

284 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Toil on, ye brave, with steady aim,

And bid all tempters flee;
With truth your guide, a noble fame

Your sure reward shall be.

And oft, as o'er some cherished place,

Fond mem'ry loves to dwell;
The scenes of youth and joy to trace

And weave her magic spell ;
Amid the purest, fairest dream

Of home and peace to thee,
The days at fair West Point shall seem

A blissful memory.

MBS. K , Nov. Ztih, 1870.

MY FIRST HOP.

By Cycloid.

On that fortunate evening which precedes the exodus
of the Corps of Cadets from Barracks into the long-antici-
pated and highly-colored camp, that happy evening when
one looks back upon the past or forward to the future
with equal complacency, I sat in my room by the window-
that old tower window enjoying the stimulo-sedative
fumes of an excellent cigar.

Watching the blue spirals as they rose and dissipated in
the air, 1 fell into an argumentative reverie, wherein I
put to myself the pro and con of a question, whicli at
that time I held to be of signal importance.

My cigar and reverie ended, as all cigars and reveries
must ; I felt convinced of the excellence of both.

I rose, cast the stump into the darkness, and said to

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

285

my faithful mirror, " This yearling camp I will be a
spooney man." AV.-.-ks iled away ; the Fourth of July
passed and the first hop, before I gathered nerve to make
my '/<'/W. \ wandered to the hop-room every night, and
still my courage fell as my color rose j yet in spite of un-
consciousness of qualification (for I was a handsome man)

MARTELAER'S ROCK.

I <-'>uld not get away from the crowd of bashful yearlings
around the door. My mortification was intense to se%
classmates walk with well-bred insou-dance upon a lady's
skirt, and disintegrate, without an awkward blush, a
damsel's fan, and whisper nonsense in her ear; while I,
].(-. -s>ing hands, feet, and tongue, could only cling to the
pillars with the first, denying myself the pleasure of exhibit-
ing the artificial smallness of the second, and the persuasive
powers of the third. After many days of unrest I un-
bosomed my soul to my friend and tent-mate Pensezamoi,

286 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

who was famous as a lady's man, and had often rallied
me on mes affaires ^imagination, This obliging indivi-
dual "would be delighted" to introduce an unsophisti-
cated, seized my hand and congratulated me on my wise
resolution, and promised to present me at the next hop
to Miss McDiamant, who was the belle of the Point.
This fair lady had several good points ; danced divinely,
and it had often been my occupation to watch her from
my post at the door, as her delicately* perfumed skirts
were spread in the whirl of the Redowa, or rested with
that grace dans repos which she alone had the secret
of. I had moreover listened in a first-classman's tent,
after taps, to the glowing spooney men as they talked of
the divine waltzes and galops, till finally I succeeded in
conquering my bashfulness and other insipidities which I
felt belonged only to a Plebe. The fatal night swung
around, and I prepared myself nearly irresistible. The
only blemish I was cursed with a charming pimple-
was neatly covered with court-plaster, and I was so
scented with musk, that I learned afterwards some of the
cadets were lifting up my tent-floor, and poking under it
with sticks until tattoo. I had also committed to memory
some scraps of poetry " a la Byron ;" but it is needless to
dwell on such trifles as these. I was presented to Miss
McDiamant by Pensezamoi, in the following ever- to-be-
remembered language : " Miss McDiamant, Mr. Cycloid-
Mr. Cycloid, Miss McDiamant."

Old conventionalist as I now am, I can never forget the
transcendent bliss of that moment ; that my heart was
where my tongue should be, I knew and the flattering

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 28"i

lush of her cheek, the quavering tremble of her tones.
and finally the quiet self-possession and subtle dexterity
with which she assumed the conversation, and turned it
upon an indifferent subject to relieve us both, was mis-
calculably enchanting.

The subject was the weather, but congenial spirits and
sympathetic intellects soon cross the conversational desert
and fall upon refreshing oases. So with a melting glance
which seemed to bring the peach-bloom to her cheek, she
said, u Oh, Mr. Cycloid, I nearly carried you off the other
night." This referred to an occasion when the aforemen-
tioned skirts, deploying all over the floor as usual, had
suddenly wound around my worse than useless legs, and
gyrated me like a top into society about a movable axis.
How the simple reminiscence affects me now ! My legs
still turn in the same place ; my inertia is again disturbed,
and I feel the thrill which that contact generated !
early/' said I. with a world of meaning in my tone
'entirely, rather, legs, heart, and soul!" "Ah!"
sighed she, " you are a real cadet ! "

At this my spirit nearly exhaled, for to be called a
" real cadet" is the height of a spooney man's ambition-
it is to call him Prince, Colonel, Commandant, or to a
Thanksgiving dinner. My feeling of success was now
assured, and it would have been a contradiction of Scrip-
ture had not my pride received a fall and alas ! I fell.
Pcnsezamoi, who was always making 1><>,t-mot$, came up
with one of his infernal puns, and said to Miss McDia-
mant : "I suppose so engaging a young lady as your
is already engaged?" While she was still blushing r

288 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

red, I, like a blundering idiot as I was, presumed that
wow was my time or never, for a "keen," but some
gibbering fiend must have been at my brain, when I said,
'* Yes, she has just come out of an engagement, don't you
see the shot-holes in her ? "

The scarlet that suffused her cheek, and the anger that
rose in her eyes at' this, terrified me ; but what was my
agony and despair when I perceived by the wrathful fire
iri her complexion, that she was slightly, very slightly,
marked with small-pox. I could only smite my hands
together and murmur, " Shot-holes ! oh ! I didn't mean

." When I opened my eyes she was gone.

RECOLLECTIONS.

FOKT BOISEE, Dec. IZth, 1870.

According to my promise, I give some of my recollec-
tions of some old officers of the army whom I knew as
cadets, or in the service. All the pointed stories have
been repeated so often, that to try to renew them now
would be much like writing as original the " Old Joes " of
Harper's Magazine. But as a story does not always
require to end with an absurdity, or a joke, some few
anecdotes can yet be found, and as good as any one to
begin with will be this of Cadet ULYSSES S. GRANT, once
known as " Uncle Sam," and likely to continue in history
under that name.

He graduated about the 18th of June, 1843, in a rather
less than usual number of classmates, but containing
many who have been highly distinguished since.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 289

r e had heard of Grant's riding, and when the cl
was called to exercise before the Board of Visitors, the
riding-hall was crowded with spectators.

After some very fine exhibitions of horsemanship, our
riding-master, Herschberger, called out a dragoon who
stood erect, holding one end of a pole at arms' length
above his head, the other end against the wall, and the
pole horizontal, and then quietly signalled Cadet Grant to
ride over it. He started " York/' a famous jumper of
ihat class, galloped slowly around, and coming up very
deliberately, the horse poised on his haunches an instant,
forefeet in the air, and sprang like a cat. I never saw a
horse and man so high in the air before, but, in an instant,
he cleared the pole, coming down with a tremendous

' thud
His

is rider was fully equipped as a cavalry officer. One
such shock would have seemed enough for one man in one
day, but the ladies seemed so delighted, that presently a
" repeat " was called for, and the same thing was attempted
four times more. Once he carried the pole up on his
knees as he rose, but the other three leaps were as good
as the first. York was a magnificent chestnut-colored
horse, seventeen hands high, and the strongest quick horse
I ever saw.

lie would not tolerate an inferior rider, and sometimes
would drop such a one, and go through the rest of the
drill alone, never mistaking a movement nor misunder-
standing the word of command.

. R. HERSCHBERGER, our riding-master, was a superb
orsenian, and his command of a horse was remarkable.

290 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Every horse in the squadron knew and obeyed his com-
mands. Once, when I stopped to pick up little "Dr. 77
Edwards 7 cap for him, and so fell behind, as I started to
join the platoon, my horse ll Hunter 77 (a mate to " York 77 )
fancied it would be a good joke to run away with me.
He was carrying me, involuntarily, at a tremendous pace,
towards a precipice below the Hospital, when Hersch-
berger discovered my trouble, and in his stentorian tone
commanded "Halt! 77 "Hunter 77 obeyed the command
sooner than I could, for though I was leaning back to
pull, I nearly went over his head.

Herschberger married, shortly after I left the Point, a
lady who had, as he said, " twenty thousand a year, for
one year" and retiring from army life, lived, let us hope,
happily ever afterward.

The class of 7 43 were relieved from duty, and the usual
u Graduates 7 Stag 77 laid off* on the pavement from old
South Barracks to the mess-hall. The candles were all
stuck down and lighted, and everything going on well,
when " Selden 77 suddenly raised the question, " Where's
Uncle Sam ? 77

As he could not be found, a committee consisting of
"Wackford," "Tar River, 77 " Nancy Sykes, 77 and ''Mod-
die, 77 started for his room in North Barracks " No. 9,' 7
where Grant was found alone, in the dark, with his heels
on the mantel-piece, blowing a cloud.

" Come, Sam, 77 was the cry, "what the deuce are you
staying here for, when the stag-dance is going on ? 77

Puffing a volume, he deliberately replied : " Oh ! let me
alone, boys ! I have been hiding this old pipe ever since

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 291

k from furlough. It has been my secret and
confidential friend for two years, while it was forbidden ;
and now that the time has come when I can smoke it
without walking 'two extras,' it don't taste as good as I
expected."

I met Grant as a Second Lieutenant, about four years
afterwards, on the Plain of Perote ; when he invited me
to stop and dine with him at a little spring. I had
nothing, arid he had only one egg, which he divided
and gave me the big end.

I do not recall many peculiarities of SHERMAX, but one
thing has often recurred to me in connection with his
march from Atlanta.

In 1845, Lieutenant Sherman was stationed at Augusca
Arsenal, Georgia. He occupied a great deal of his leisure
time in travelling by stage between Augusta, Atlanta,
Milledgeville, Macon and Savannah, with the ostensible
object of examining the public lands of Georgia, which, it
may be remembered, were placed in market that year.

the has a wonderful memory, and good topographical
3, it is highly probable that the knowledge of the
country obtained at that time was of the greatest value to
him after wart Is in the famous march to the sea. A
charming young lady of Savannah described Lieutenant
Sherman to me at that time, much as follows : " He is so
uirly that he is positively handsome; ho can do anytln
paint pictures, write poetry, or talk politics, and every
word comes out like a brickbat, hard enou-h to knock y< MI
down." In 1840, Lieutenants Sherman, Ord. and llalleek
went in the transport " Lexington " to California. Now,

292 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

they are the only ones left in service of the six officers of
that expedition, and all are General officers. In 1849,
Lieutenant Sherman was on his way, mule-back, to Mon-
terey, California. . He met a party of seventeen men, who
had run away from Company " F," 3d Artillery, but did
not know that they were deserters. A few words to each
caused them to v turn; back and follow him to town, where
an old Spaniard asked him if.it did not occur to him that
so many deserters, all armed, might have easily shot him,
and made their escape. i; Upon my word 77 said he, " I
never thought of that ! But it makes no difference now. 77

Inl86$,.,ol met v the, lady w.ho, in 1846, had been so
much impressed with the handsome-ugly Lieutenant Sher-
man. She referred to him as " that frightful, destructive,
revengeful Attila of the North, who could not forgive the
Southerns , for chasing him out of Louisiana. 77 When I
asked her if they had just reasons for chasing him out,
she pouted' (she was still pretty on a pout, besides being
a widow), and said " of course we had. 77 So, if General
Sherman never knew why he left the South as a fugitive,
to return as a conqueror, he must ask the pretty widow.

One more about Sherman. While commanding Com-
pany " F, 77 3d Artillery, he ordered a garrison court-
martial upon an old fighter of his, to whom he had fre-
quently lent money. J He approved of the proceedings, and
was next day coolly informed that he had himself pre-
cluded the possibility of payment, by stopping one month's
pay. As Sherman at that time had expensive duty and
small pay, it is probable that his comments were forcible.

That same old soldier who was tried proved afterwards

a brave L

V.'IIST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 293

brave Indian fighter, and, continuing to seek danger,
enlisted in the Second Infantry. After several actions,
during which he counted " three," he swallowed too much
Colorado water, which acts like emery on the system, and
I buried him " with his boots on."

Continuing the story of the officers who rounded the

orn in 1840, brings HALLECK next. Without any inten-
tion of trespassing upon Dickens' phrase : il He is a very
remarkable man, sir." My first knowledge of him was in
the winter of 1845, when he was offered the sum of three
hundred dollars to deliver a set of lectures before the Lowell
Institute upon "Military. Subjects." The price was in
those days considered extraordinary. We waited for the
result, which appeared one year after in " Essaj-s upon
Military Art." The book satisfied everybody, although it
is said that the author has since tried to suppress it as
unequal to his best capacity. Undoubtedly that book
made him, years afterward, a Major-General It was for
many years borne upon the muster-rolls of companies,
and if rend now might almost amount to prophecy.

The subsequent attempts of Lieut. Halleck, as a poet,
were not successful, and he applied himself to the study
of law, in which he accumulated a large fortune.

His work on International Law has become renowned,
and is now considered as an authority.

It should be mentioned here that there was n large
engagement, with about equal forces, in Lower California,
at a time when success almost insured predominant
the Pacific coast. Halleck, as a volunteer, commanded
one company, and, at a critical moment, (Linked the

294 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

enemy, charged bravely, and drove the Mexicans, who
were hotly pressed in front, from the field. The victory
was complete. He was brevetted Captain for this fight.
Benton, now dead, always gave full credit to Halleck for
this affair. Success was necessary ; repulse was exter-
mination. * * * The stories about Captain ORD,
when I first knew him, made him almost as great a hero
as Robinson Crusoe. Personal anecdotes about him were
abundant, but when I met him I found that there was no
self-assertion about him. The story of his rescuing his
First Sergeant, who was shot through both hips, and bring-
ing him out safely through a fire of deadly marksmen,
had been told me, and the Sergeant (Lynch), who lived
to be a Lieutenant-Colonel, never missed his chance of
telling how his life was saved ; but I never saw the full
manhood of Ord until he passed through Benicia, on his
way to San Francisco.

Of course the wildest and least valuable man of Com-
pany u B," 3d Artillery, was drunk. Just before the
steamer came, this unfortunate staggered and plunged
overboard into an ebb-tide of six knots an hour. Hardly
had he struck the water, before Captain Ord plunged after
him. They emerged together, Ord holding the man by
the back, and grasping one of the piles of the wharf.
Confusion everywhere, and the right thing forgotten.

I ran back on the wharf and produced a ladder. It was
very cold, but Ord, whose teeth were chattering, would
not release his hold of the man until he had fastened a
rope around him.

Then he took hold of the ladder, and both were drawn

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 295

up. He went into the wharf-house, changed his clothes,
and then ordered the man to be confined in the guard-
house for being drunk.

In the close personal combats that the Xorthern Indian
wars of California produced, the cool courage of Ord
always resulted in success.

Probably no officer of the army has encountered greater
personal risk, for he has always forgotten danger ; yet he
was only severely wounded once.

Early in 1856, while the Kamiakin's war was raging in
Oregon and Washington Territories, Lieutenant PHIL. H.
SHERIDAN, 4th Infantry, distinguished himself by rescuing
the garrison at Cascades. It is too long a story to tell in
such a u sketchy /v paper as this, but the act showed so
many qualities of the educated soldier, especially quick-
ness in plan, and boldness in execution, that it gained him
the well-deserved plaudits of all the old soldiers of the
Pacific coast. His success was perfect, and tbe men who
owed their lives to his daring, afterwards helped to give
him that reputation which caused the President to make
the fortunate experiment of appointing him a Brigadier-
general of Volunteers.

The action at the Cascades was not his only trial, but it
was so well done that a pitched battle could not have
added much more to his reputation.

* * I am getting into the piv-
dicament of the Divinity student, who, during a vacation,
in a class meeting, being invited to "lead in ///w '-<//." did
so to a considerable extent, and finally had to confess that
he "did not know how to wind the darned thing up.'*

296 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

So I will just add a few old soldier anecdotes, some of
which came from my grandfather, who was an old " Revo-
lutionary," and some from my father, who was a " Parti-
san/' and believed in Jackson.

They were old stories when " my folks " heard them,
and if they have been " improved on " since, I would not
dispute the squatter title.

When '' our army " was operating in Flanders, con-
siderable amusement was caused by the requisition of a
young captain of pioneers, who asked for " sixty men,
thirty feet high, to lay a marsh-bridge across a quicksand
about twenty-five feet deep ! " he, having been promised
by his G-eneral any assistance that he considered necessary,
if he would only accomplish the work. [.From the G-entle-
man's Magazine. London, 1776.] This is sufficiently
shocking ! But what will you think, when I tell you that
the original proposition of "Captain Bobadil and his
twenty ' sworders, ? ;7 was seriously made as a method of
extirpating the Turks in Transylvania. This was about
the year 1620, and the proposition was made by an
Englishman named Smith, who proposed that each day
he and his twenty picked swordsmen should go out and
fight an equal number of Turks, until they were all exter-
minated ; Smith, and his twenty men, being such ex-
perienced fencers that they were always sure of victory.
You will feel relieved when I add that this ingenious
volunteer was not John, but, Thomas Walsingham Smith.
It has always been a source of gratification to reflect, that
had he lived in this time, he would have signed himself
T. Walsingham Smith. But he did not. Let us be duly
thankful! * * *

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 297

During the Peninsular war, one of Picton's men, a
hardy Irishman named Pat Geraghty (pronounced Grarr<-tij)
called on General Picton, after his famous u kick at the
shell"- (a story so often told the duplicate of which did
not fortunately occur on James' river), and asked for
three months leave to visit his wife. Picton replied :
" Why, Pat, I have not seen my wife for five years!"
(lie had buried her about five years before, although Pat.
did not know it.) Och ! yer honor," says Pat, " Biddy
and I is not one of them kind ! " He did not get his

m! * * *

I lost some valuable books in the South in 1862, and
therefore cannot give you names and dates for some old
stories that I have often laughed over. I think the fol-
lowing is in the " Peninsular Sketches/' but it may be in
11 Traits of Travel in Spain" no matter :

A wounded Highlander in a Portuguese hospital was
comforted by a Sister of Charity, who after u bathing his
bro\v," and refusing him a glass of Farintosh, tried to
read to him an English newspaper. The patient Scot
listened to a wonderful account of a great victory said to
have hern gained by Spanish troops over the French, and
then inquired, "Is that signed by General Cabrera'. 1 "
But this was hardly an original tale. Something like it
i< related in th ; first war of Charles XII.
One of Prince llupert's horsemen \viis called to account
for a soldier of his troop, who was accused of plundering.
He denied it, of course, eulogizing the general conduct of
his men. and calling one up at random, asked him,
" Have you stolen anything to-day, you rascal '.' "

298 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

" Nothing but this little pearl necklace, please your
Honor," was the reply. " There !" said the Captain of the
Troop, triumphantly, " My men may steal a trifle, but
they won't /ie No, Sir! They won't lie ! ! "

The Duke of Wellington's army, contrary to the gene-
ral historical representations, possessed -very little disci-
pline in the American sense, of obedience to orders,
waiting for officers to direct, patience under fire, submis-
sive endurance of loss in the beginning of battle, restraint
in victory, understanding of the meaning of a movement,
and working individually towards the accomplishment of
that understanding. The Peninsular army always plun-
dered both friend and foe always broke ranks, and
refused to form in mixed companies, to meet renewed
attacks, which luckily they seldom had to oppose.

I was about to tell a story illustrative of this want of
discipline, but a friend here calls my attention to the
remarkable contrast presented by Scott's army in Mexico ;
so let us delay, to recite the story of how Cerro Gordo
was won.

Santa Anna, the bravest and best of all Mexicans,
had posted about 14,000 good soldiers, of whom 11,000
were said to be regular troops, in a perfect and strong
position at Cerro G-ordo. The only defect of his position
was that if he succeeded, he could not pursue-, nor cut off
Scott's retreat. But I shall not discuss the battle, I only
wish to show how General Scott prepared for the fight.

He summoned every battalion commander to his head-
quarters, and explained every movement that he should
undertake, and the relative positions of all the regiments

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 299

the time of attack the time when he hoped the
enemy's line would be carried what the troops were to
do when their work was done what troops were to join
in pursuit and what the remainder were to do. 11 -
then gave general directions as to treatment, of prisoners,
depending upon how much provisions and tents might be
captured ; and dismissed those commanders, with per-
mission to make all arrangements for their own commands.

The battalion commanders immediately called in all
their commissioned officers, and gave them full instruc-
tions relative to the whole plan of battle.

Company officers freely informed their sergeants and
corporals, and the next day the battle was fought, every
man in the ranks knowing as much about it as the Gene-
ral had told the day before.

The result exceeded General Scott's calculations as to
time, but fulfilled his prophetic orders.

PNow, let's go back to the Peninsula. The passage of
the Douro was a good thing, but afterwards, although the
fight was so trifling, "The Duke" found half a dozen
sturdy soldiers sitting safely in an old brick-kiln.

He rode up, and somewhat anxiously asked them
My men, are you wounded ? "
Xo, your Honor," was the reply.

" No ! and by you don't intend to be, you

med scoundrels !" said he : "and he made them get up
airl go forward," says the matter of tact historian. * *
When Frederick the Great first invaded Silesia, his
orders were very strict that all private property should
be respected.

uc iv;oijv;

300 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

In the course of the campaign a woman came to one of
his Colonels with a complaint that his Orderly had seized
her chickens Of course the Orderly was called to
account, when he excused himself as follows:

"Colonel, there is no man in the army who respects
and obeys your orders better than I do ; but these are
Austrian chickens and do not sympathize with us. So I
first remonstrated with them, and then seized them." * *

But you will get tired of hearing the origin of the many
"original anecdotes" of the civil war. All had their
counterparts in the days of old. There are some things,
however, that were never printed, and this is one of
them :

" Extract from the minutes of Proceedings of the City
Council of Q bia, S. C., on the 27th of April, 1868.

"Resolved, That the 'Council learn with regret that
Lieut. Col. J. R. E., 8th Infantry, U. S. A., is relieved
from the position of commanding officer in the city ; that
his impartial administration, and his kind and conciliatory
manners, have justly gained the respect and goodwill of
this community, and that the City Clerk convey to him in
an appropriate letter, an expression of the kind feelings
which we entertain towards him."

The Appropriate Letter.

" LIEUT. COL. J. K E., U. S. A.

"DEAR SIR, It affords me great pleasure to be the medium o:
conveyance of a resolution (No. 167) which passed the City Council
last night. I also avail myself of this opportunity to enclose the
bill of the city against you for water from the city water-works up

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 301

to date, amounting to one dollar and twenty-five cents ($1.25),
which please remit, and oblige,

" Your obedient servant,

" JOHN P. McMAXx,

" City Clerk."

[ere's richness !
I would like to tell you. lots of stories, but writing them
is not like talking them. I never was good on a written
article, as is needless to remark, but as a spoken article, I
will say with eyes uplifted, across the continent

" Klar-hoy-um ! "

THE ENGINE NOZZLE.

Among the wildest men in my class was Cadet G .

His propensities for deviltry were unparalleled, as was
also his good luck in never getting caught in any scrape.
At the same time he was very studious, always in the
"first section" in everything, and when we graduated,
he received a commission in the Corps of Engineers.

While we were " Second Class-men," and nearly crazed
with "Azimuths" and " Lunar Culminations," no wonder
that we should have our "loony periods," and many a
night, " after taps," did we rout out the officer-in-charge
with our " disturbing forces."

After puzzling our brains during study hours in the
evening over our Phil, lesson, some dozen of us would
casually meet on the porch of the Barracks after taps and
en leaver calmly ta discuss some knotty point in the
lesson ; but all in vain, for G , backed by " Dad " and

302 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

three or four others, would suddenly send a tenpin ball
(taken from the bowling alley) bounding along the porch
amongst us, at the same time setting up a tremendous
yell. We could not do less than return the ball, and the
result would be a regular "Phil, riot" which was only
ended by the sudden appearance of the officer-in-charge.

Occasionally, for a change, we would fill " Old Patrick's"
iron buckets with coal, and then gently roll them down
the iron staircase ; making enough noise to awaken the
" seven-sleepers. 7 ' One night G - suggested that we
should all buckle on our sabres, letting them hang down,
and then, dividing up into parties of three or four, go
quietly up to the " cockloft" of the various divisions, and
come tearing down the iron staircases, our sabres clank-
ing, and all yelling at the top of our voices.

This succeeded beyond our wildest anticipations, for the
party of which I was one had just rounded the staircase
on the second flight in the " Fourth Div." when we ran
into, and almost knocked down, Col. K , who was
making a night inspection.

We four received our merited share of " demerit " and
"extras," but G , the prime mover of the affair, was
not caught.

We never yet failed to awaken the officer-in-charge,
and generally we were successful in not getting " hived. 1 "
I remember one night in October, 1865, there was a lunar
eclipse about eleven o'clock, and as we were all heavy on
lunar eclipses, we were in duty bound to see the thing
come off.

Full half of my class were out quietly looking at the

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK 303

, when suddenly from the top and sides of the " old
dial-stone," in the centre of the area, there appeared one
of the finest displays of fireworks I think I ever witnessed.
I am of the opinion that I should have enjoyed it more
had it not been for the frequent explosions, and the drop-
ping of bell-buttons amongst us. As usual, on all occa-
sions of ceremony, the officer-in-charge put in an appear-
ance, and I did not stay to see the result, but I learned
afterwards that the display was the combined efforts of
G , "Dad.," and "Tip.," who had made use of some
powder-cartridges that " Dad." had hived at artillery drill,
and had manufactured some diabolical compositions, using
a lot of bell-buttons filled with powder for shells. It was
a complete success, and no one was caught. But all this
has nothing to do with the engine nozzle. Yes, it has,
too, for these little pleasantries were merely avant-couriers
of the affair with the engine nozzle. For about a month
we had been engaged almost every night in some kind of
deviltry, and it seemed as though we had made use of
every expedient that it was possible to devise for the an-
noyance of the officer-in-charge. It was a critical moment !
One night, as usual, about twelve o'clock, we were " owl-

Iing " around in drawers, slippers, and dressing-gowns,
seriously meditating a night assault on the cadet ofnVrr of
the day, when G - suddenly suggested that we .should
break into the engine-house, back of the guard-room, and
"hive " one of the nozzles, and then blow the church-cull
in the sally-port.

G thought that it might possibly inspire some of the

Professors' families with the idea that the millennium had

304 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

come, and that the Angel G-abriel was blowing his last
trump. It wasn't long before we had picked the lock, and
found one of the nozzles belonging to the fire-engine.

We fastened the door again, and proceeded in a body
towards the sally-port. There was quite a little discus-
sion as to who knew the church-call best ; G , being a

minister's son, had the preference.

The nozzle was too heavy for one man to hold and
blow at the same time ; so one of us, I forget who, rested
the nozzle on his shoulder, and G - filled his lungs and
commenced.

Great heavens ! What a solemn sound ! and such an

echo ! It was simply grand ! G - tried it again. It
would have filled " Old Bentz " with envy, could he have
heard those mournful strains.

On the principle that " enough is as good as a feast,"
and furthermore with an eye to using our improvised
bugle again on the next propitious night, we refrained
from any further refrain, and slowly retired, hiding the
nozzle under a pile of coal in one of the cellars.

The next morning there was the tallest kind of a row.
The man who had charge of the engine-house reported
to the Commandant that the engine-room had been broken
into, and one of the nozzles stolen ! It was of no use to
ask questions, or to hunt for it. No one knew anything
about it ! We kept low for two or three nights, until the

row had blown over, when we went out, and G blew

the church-call again in the sally-port, calmly and de-
liberately.

Once was enough for that night ; we did not dare try

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 305

it again. The Commandant, the next morning, called up
some of the wildest of the " yearling class," and told them
he suspected they were at the bottom of it, and that if he
found out who it was that was engaged in it, the severest
punishment would be the result ; but they all honestly
and stoutly denied it.

It was very natural that the Commandant should have
thought the u yearling class " had perpetrated the joke, for
generally they are the most reckless class ; but in this case,
it was the dignified (?) second class, and he never once
dreamed that they were guilty of such a boyish freak.

Some few nights after this, G , with his usual audacity,

treated the residents of the post to another dose of
church-call at midnight, and cleared out in time to save
himself. This was too much !

The Commandant the next morning published an order,
that if he should find out who it was that blew that nozzle
in the sally-port, he would turn him over to the civil
authorities in Cold Spring, and have him tried for house-
breaking.

We all concluded that the last (h)air had broken the
camel's back, and that a repetition would certainly result
in capture and disgrace ; so, one night in the wee small
hours, two or three of us suspended the oilending noz/le by
a string to the Academic staircase, where, next morning,
it was found slowly vibrating in the wind, with a board
covered with white cloth nailed above it. and the aggra-
vating words " KI-YI-YI ! ! !" printed "on it in large blaek
letters.

All attempts to find out the p.Tprtrutors proved nna-

306 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

vailing, and we have often had a good laugh over this
scrape.

"KEVIEWING THE CAMPAIGN."

That love and war are strangely similar, no one, wear-
ing the scars of either, it is said, attempts to deny. Most
certainly, the soldier turns with strange readiness to the
campaign of love, but not always is it that victory crowns
honest effort. The shattered warrior shows " how fields
were won/ 7 but the story of defeat is seldom honestly told.
The facts may be admitted, but disastrous campaigns are
seldom given in detail. At times, however, the unsuc-
cessful warrior, with sad regret, recalls the time when
victory smiled delusive for awhile and then deserted his
beloved banner.

TROPHY GUNS.

To the baffled besieger of the fairy citadel of lovely
woman's affections, those introspective periods are fearful
ordeals.

The faithful pipe was my sole companion on one sum-

UNT SCRAP-BOOK.

307

mer night when I leaned out of my window in the
11 Eighth Div.," and gazed on the grand old stars that had
silently swept over that far land in the East where the
11 Little one " had journeyed. The quiet of the summer
night was broken only by the faint rustle of the forest,
and the singing river far below carried away my thoughts
on the silvery flood of memory far beyond the whitening
foam that marked the cruel reefs whereon Hope was
wrecked, and on the great gulf-stream of affection, were
drawn by some grand affinity to the storied land where
the little feet were resting for a brief time on the great
Highway of Life.

I went over a siege again in my mind, and a fair star
that I had often watched with her was low in the west,
and the skies beyond the sleeping hills in the east were
brightly hinting at daybreak before I had fallen asleep to
be haunted by a mocking dream that the fortress of her
heart was mine, and a firm, yet welcome, " military rule ''
was therein established.

Ah ! no, I never can forget

That May-day, with its dreamy splendor;
I fancied in her eyes I saw

A challenge from the fair defender.
I fear that nothing from the charge

Of slight deceit can really save her;
The promise of her brightening glance.

Was sure " a fair field and no favor."

The challenge answered quickly was,

For prudence whispered unavailing,
I saw that I had " broken ground,"

Thus "regular approach." entailing.

308 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The lovely garrison did then

" Reserve's " strong works man to defend her,
While on her sweet cheek blushes red

Hung out their flag of "no surrender."

I often parleyed with the foe,

And fun's brisk pickets were untiring,
While now and then, with heavy guns

Of sentiment, I opened firing.
'Twas Greek and Greek, the fight grew warm,

I saw that she would give "no quarter,"
I schooled my soul to gallant deeds

And "feats of arms," or nothing shorter.

The siege crept on; the fighting brisk;

It deepened into reckless dashes,
In "hand to hand encounters" we

Were wounded oft by wit's bright flashes;
And many were the shots that told,

They made me wince beneath my armor;
But, Hamlet-like, I had "a touch,"

I do confess I did not harm her.

I called a council dire of war,

There Passion, wild, " assault," was crying,
While "patient siege " cold Reason urged,

And " hot pursuit " on signs of flying.
When morning broke, my mind made up,

I rallied all my broken forces,
In grand review, inspected all,

And thought on many different courses.

At last, resolved on " night assault,"
I seized a chance that promised fairly;

The struggle followed, brief and sharp,
Then for a time I prospered rarely.

"WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The moonlight showed me on her cheek

The roses whiten into ashes,
The splendid eyes were turned away,

Tears trembled on the fringing lashes.

The hour was fraught with victory sweet,

Truce followed, brief, yet how Elysian 1
Siege ended, and the garrison

Surrendered with but one condition.
Allegiance future seemed secure,

" Parole d' honneur " was gi'en and granted,
Love's colors glowed in dimpling hues,

Where bright defiance first enchanted.

Ah me ! the time seems very long;

The peace that smiled was ruthless broken,
And scars that cover aching wounds,

Are now my victory's barren token.
A lone heart asks of her to-night,

Where peace and honor e'er attend her,
To wonder if she prides herself

On victory by "betrayed surrender."

309

X. Q. M.

OLLA PODRIDA.

There are various little incidents that come to my mind
on closing this volume that cannot well he placed under
any particular heading. Though unconnected scraps.
some of them may prove interesting to those who still
remember their Alma Mater.

I can never forget " old Patrick, " the kind-hearted old
Irishman, with his " good marnin', gintleniin ! " as he came
into my room in the morning to empty the buckets, and

310

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

occasionally making the remark : "Ye use a power o'
wather in th' cockloft, gintlemin ! "

Patrick is one of the janitors or policemen of the Cadet
Barracks.

There are three of them employed, and they police the
Barracks daily, scrub floors, and empty the slop-pails ;
they are worked harder and paid poorer than any of the
employees at the Academy. They are always ready to do

CADETS' MESS-HALL.

a cadet any kindness, and many a pleasant chat have I
had with them.

Patrick is now well advanced in years, having been em-
ployed there over thirty years. He has known nearly all
the graduates in the army, when they were cadets, and
you cannot mention an officer's name to him without his
replying: " Oh ! yes, sir ! I know'ed him well ; a fine gin-
tlemin he was, too ; he was short like, wid sandy hair ; a
fine gintlemin, he lint me foive dollars onst."

One morning while Patrick was clearing out the lower

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

311

in the " Eighth Div." he found a whiskey bottle behind
the staircase, on the floor, with a little whiskey still left
in it.

Let me say, right here, that Patrick had a way of talk-
ing and singing to himself while engaged in his work, ami
whether, on the morning in question, he soliloquized
from the force of habit, or because he thought some one
might be near him and overhear him, 1 cannot say.
Patrick looked all around to see if any one was observing
him, and then, taking up the bottle in a loving manner,
remarked in his droll way : " Phat is in the bottle I dun
no ! " Slowly he pulled out the cork, smelled of the con-
tents, and, looking around again to see that no one was
near, said to himself, with a tone of surprise, u Be the
powers, it's whishkey ; I'll t'row it out! " and then deliber-
ately placed it to his lips, and drained it dry, put the empty
bottle in his pocket, and went about his work, humming
a tune to himself with a virtuous air, as if he never had
seen a drop of whiskey in his life. It so happened that a
cadet on the next floor overheard Patrick's soliloquy, and
saw him " t'row it out." It wasn't long before every one.
in the corps heard of it, and quizzed old Patrick unmer-
cifully about the " whishkey."

# # # * * *

Bentz, the bugler, was one of the " characters " at the
Point, and, in addition, the finest bugler in the Sen;
He has blown all the bugle-calls there for over thirty-live
years. He has now delegated that position to his son,
who was taught at an early age the mysteries of the
" pugle." Old Bentz knows all the officers of the army

312 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

that have graduated since 1830, and no graduate ever

returns to West Point without having a chat with Bentz.

He was a regularly enlisted soldier, and every time he
re-enlisted he would generally celebrate the event by get-
ting a little " elevated." On those occasions the notes
from his bugle were not always clear. One of his re-enlist-
ments happened during my stay at the Academy, and his
endeavors to blow the u call to quarters/' in the evening,
w*ere very ludicrous. One of the cadets sung out, " Bentz,
what is the matter with your bugle ? "

He replied, with a very solemn face, " I dink some-
pody 'as put nails in my pugle, or dey 'av feel it mit
rocks ! " So, whenever the bugle-calls were not blown as

well as usual, we would say he had " nails in his pugle."
# # # # # #

There come to mind some ludicrous explanations that
were written and sent in to the Commandant's office by
cadets who were reported for various offences.

When we were " Plebes," Cadet R , of my class
who afterwards resigned was reported for " raising hand
in ranks at squad-drill."

It seems that R - had raised his hand to brush away
a wasp that was trying to effect an entrance into his ear,
and thought it very hard to be reported for such a natu-
ral motion. He had been frequently told to write all
explanations very briefly, and I think he hit the nail on
the head when he sent in the following :

" Offence Raising hand in ranKS at squad-drill.
" Explanation Bug in ear.

" Respectfully submitted."

I in
i

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 313

Cadet Y was once

reported for " not holding sword properly at guard
mounting;" the offence having been committed by Cad-t

- said nothing when he heard the report read out,
although he knew it was an error, but went quietly up to
his room and wrote the following :

Offence Xot holding sword properly at guard mount-
ing.

Explanation I am not used to holding swords ; hav-
ing been a cadet private during my entire stay at
the Academy, my only guide as regards the duties
of an officer, is, by watching the movements of the
First Class officers ; and their styles of holding
swords are so different as to leave me entirely in
the dark as to the proper manner. I have always
tried to hold my sword correctly, but concerning
the offence stated above, I cannot say positively,
as I was not there at the time, having marched off
guard two days before, and not having been on

since.

" Respectfully submitted."

'he onT'itil interview between Y- - and the Com-
mandant, shortly after, can be readily imagined by those
who have " gone through the mill/'

One more, and I am done with explanations :
Cadet B- was reported for being u absent from
breakfast roll-call/' and in his explanation stated that he
" was in the ; Acoustic Shadow ' at the time, and did not
tear the drum."

314 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

The Commandant sent for B ; and told him that he

would remove the report, but that "when he had any-
thing of the kind the matter with him again, he must go
to the hospital and get excused by the Surgeon".

Just before the January and June examinations come
off, the "Immortals" (i. e. the lowest section) of each
class, but more especially of the " Plebe class," feel con-
siderable anxiety as to the result of the coming examina-
tion, and doubting (very rightly] their inability to get
through. Many a poor fellow, who, during the year has
not been very studious, thinks if he only knew what sub-
ject he would have at the examination, he would be able
to pass the ordeal. At such times, the most daring of the
" Immortals " will spend most of their time, prying around
to discover the list of subjects that are to be given out.

Let me explain a little about the method of distribut-
ing subjects.

The Instructor of each section in a class, shortly before
the examination, places on separate bits of paper the most
important subjects of the course he has been teaching, and
shakes them up well in a hat ; then takes the list of his
section, and drawing out one of these papers at a time,
places opposite each name the subjects drawn, thus dis-
tributing the subjects impartially, without favor or affec-
tion.

Instructors who have been there any length of time
know the propensities of cadets to "hive their subjects,"
and, accordingly, take all necessary precautions to defeat
them. Once in awhile, however, they are overreached,
as I will show.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 315

uring the January examination in 18G5, before the
Immortals of the Plebe class " were called up, one of
eir number, Cadet R - (who left at the end of the
second year, and afterwards obtained a commission in the
Infantry), found out in some way that the Immortals' list

~ f subjects in Math, was kept in his Instructors desk in
e examination-room. All attempts to bribe the janitor
the Academic building failed utterly, he being a per-
fectly upright man.

One night, after having previously collected a huge
bunch of keys, and equipped with a dark-lantern, Cadet
R . with one or two others, made an assault on the
Academic building, and, finding a window that was not
fastened, they succeeded in getting into the building.
The examination-room was in the third story, and
ither they proceeded slowly and cautiously, not doubt-
g but that one of the keys would fit the lock of the door;
t not one of the twenty keys would answer. After a
ort consultation, they procured a rope, and ascended
to the garret, and succeeded in raising a trap-door, used
a ventilator in the ceiling of the room below.
R - was let down into the room, and, finding the riirht
esk, tried all his keys on the lock, but to no purpose.
What was the surprise of his friends above (who were
atehing his movements with a great deal of interest )
m deliberately turn the entire desk bottom upwards on
floor, and coolly go to work taking out the brads that
Id the bottom of the desk, and soon ho was liuulin.ir over
e papers that it contained. The list found, he copied it,
replaced all the papers as he had found them, righted the

316 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

desk, was drawn up, the trap secured, and they made their
escape to Barracks.

After the "Immortals" were examined, it was re-
marked, " How exceedingly well they all recited ! "

On the approach of the June examination in 7 65, the
Immortals all looked to R -to help them out. One day
while the battalion was at dinner, and most of the officers
had gone down to the mess, R thought it a good time
to inspect Lieutenant A -'s room on the third floor in
the angle, and hunt for subjects.

There are two staircases in the angle, leading to the

officers' rooms ; the front one being mostly used. R- ,

not being sure that Lieut. A - was out of his room,
went to the foot of the front staircase, and sung out :

"Oh! A !"

"Hallo ! 77 was the response.

" Have you been to dinner ? "

" No, not yet," yells A , not thinking it could be
any one but an officer.

" Well, hurry up, 7 ' replies R - ; "111 go on ahead ! "

"All right! 7 ' says A .

R - then retired, and as soon as Lieut. A came

down stairs the front way, he went up the back way, and his
search among papers and books resulted in the capture of
the list of subjects, and at that examination only one of
the Immortals was "found," and that was because the
victim, who had been at the foot of the class for a whole
year, and naturally stupid, could not remember his subject,
even after he had learned it.

Shortly before the January examination in 7 66 swung

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

'round, R . who was nearly "found on demerit," con-
cluded he would resign, and accordingly sent in his refi
nation, and was awaiting its acceptance during the examin-
ation.

Although R - was not interested in the coming ex-
amination, he volunteered to help his old friends " the
Immortals "out of their predicament. Col. W- - was
the Instructor of the Immortals of the yearling class at
that time, and a judicious investment of currency on the
Colonel's negro servant resulted in the servant's allowing
R - to take his place the following morning in making
the fire, blacking boots, etc., in the Colonel's room.

Reveille at that season of the year was at six o'clock,
and it was hardly light enough at that hour in the morn-
ing to distinguish a person's features at a short distance ;

, R , disguised as a negro, went up to the Colonel's

quarters, and proceeded to discharge the usual duties of a
servant, at the same time hunting around for the list of
subjects. He lighted the gas sufficiently to see around
the room, and taking the Colonel's boots, sat down near a
trunk (the only unexplored article in the room), to blacken
them. The Colonel was in bed fast asleep in an adjoining
room, with the door partly open, but happening to a\vak\
and seeing, as he supposed, his servant, he cried out in a
sleepy tone, "What time is it, Robert?" Without a

moment's hesitation, R responded in a disguised

voice, "Quarter past six. sir ! " and the Colonel, murmur-
ing "all right," was soon asleep again. R- then
went through" the trunk, and found his reward in the
ist of subjects all made out.

318 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

After copying it on a piece of paper, he replaced the
original in the trunk , put down the lid. did a little sweep-
ing, and then went out, returning to his room without
being seen.

Robert never revealed a word of the affair, and it
would never have been publicly known, had not R

himself, after his resignation, told Col. W the whole

story as a good joke.

The examination was all over then, and it was such a
daring deed, and so well contrived, that the Colonel for-
gave both R and his own servant, and never re-
ported it.

On an occasion, in the spring of the year, when the
cadets usually go out on the plain to practise their studies
in surveying, by taking the angles of the lines of the
Parade ground, etc., with the theodolite and compass, one
of ithe cadets in the "veritable Ben E well's ;J section,
" hooked off' 7 as the phrase then was and took a sur-
vey of the river for fish. Having caught several small
fish, he returned in time to be detected by the Instructor
of the section.

Seeing his dilemma, he approached the Instructor who
was very fond of a pun with his little string of fish.
The Instructor sharply demanded of him where he had
been ? The cadet answered : " I have been angling " and
holding up his fish, said, " You see, sir, it has all come
out in perches"

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 319

It seems that in the text-book on Geometry in the
theorem that " the two diagonals of a parallelogram
mutually bisect each other " (the author relying probably
for his justification of his tautology on the Declaration of
Independence), the word "bisect" was left out by the
printer. Cadet B , known in his cadet days as " Per-
fect B /' made up a demonstration to fit the dilapi-
dated annunciation of the text-book, and palmed it off on
another cadet notorious for his dulness.

Drawing the figure on the black-board, the cadet pro-
ceeded to make his demonstration :

' Let the line A B and C D be the diagonals of the
given parallelogram. Now since they are the diagonals
of a parallelogram, they must of course be parallel, and
moreover, two parallel lines having a common point (put-
ting his finger on the point of intersection , can never
meet ; for if they could, all angles being equal to two right
angles, it would be contrary to the hypothenuse, which is
absurd ! "

During the Florida war, and while General Clinch com-
manded in the Peninsula, the inn-rasing proportions of
the Indian troubles led to the President's calling out the
Florida militia with a certain General Call as tlit-ir k>a<k-r.

320 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

At the dinner-table one day in the mess-hall, those who
had not read the news discovered that there was some
excitement, which in those days was a rarity. The cadet,
who was known as " Pun - ," on being asked what was
the news, said that there had been a general clinch among
the Indians, and the President had made a general call on
the militia.

OUR LAST NIGHT IN BARRACKS.

(A Cadet Reminiscence. )

Damon and myself had long agreed that we would
spend our last night at the Academy in solemn watch, and
that a grand "war smoke" should make the occasion
memorable. Many times in the dull and dreary winter
which heralded in that happy spring, did we commune
touching this crowning festival of cadet-life. The altar of
Friendship was to be garnished for the affair, solemn
memories were to be invoked by the drowsy nicotean
incense of the cherished pipes. I shall never forget how
the symptoms of approaching graduation became more
and more alarming. The albums, the class-rings, the last
series of text-books well thumbed, heads crammed in all
possible nooks with various details of knowledge, the
"equations of interior space 7 ' of our respective crania
rudely violated, these were potent signs. Yet felt we,
with peculiar force, when " D " Company a moved out,"
that we would return no more to the dear old " 8th Div."

The slowly shifting scale of Time and cadet-rank had
lowered us from those bare and lofty apartments " au

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

321

qiiatrie-me," which first as Plebes we inhabited, until a
bright and sunny room, " stylish ami select " afl eudet
quarters could be, bore upon its door two neat car* Is. afl
follows :

I DAMON,

I INSP. Sou. Div. ;

PYTHIAS, :

CADET, LT. it Qu. MB. :

Here had we been happy ; here had the many vicis-
situdes of cadet-life found us together always heart and
hand. In friendly communion we had here exchanged
thoughts, feelings, and fancies. Here had we nightly
struggled with our " Phil.;'' here had we drawn those
singularly foolish-looking demilunes and outworks at-
tached to reliable-looking forts that bristled on the
" double elephant." Here had we slowly drawn from
grammar and lexicon, those faint hints of the Spanish
language alas ! as little Castilian as was our New Jersey
commissary soap. It (the soap) was Andalusian enough
in looks, an 'delusion was it in quality, for the alkalies of
America "raised our hide' 7 as Mark Twain would say;
and in this connection let me remark that our Spanish
did as much for our worthy Professor of that melodious
tongue. Here had occult culinary operations been carried
on in triumph, uninspected Christmas Boxes had been
gayly gobbled, and it was of this classic corner of Barn,*
that it had been happily said, "all noises could U- heard,
all occupations found going on, save those connected with
Science, Literature, and Art. "

This remark may be qualified if one will admit "the
manly art" to the charmed circle of "sciences;" call

322

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

Wilkes' Spirit " literature, 77 and give culinary operations
the dignity of "art." This hallowed region, the domain
of the intellectual Free Lances of the Corps, was very
dear to us, with all its potent faults. The " bad boy, Jim,' 7

THE CONSERVATORY AND LIBRARY.

flourished there in striking contrast to the "gcod boy ?
Sam/ 7 at t'other end of the Barracks, whose perfections
were nauseous to us of " D. 77 So it was an epoch of note,
this Hegira, the last of the "moves, 77 and we marked it as
a Red Letter day, for when we left "D 7 ' Company it was
only to leave the Corps. The temporary occupancy of that
Barrack wing by the expected " new cadets "-our Plebes
demanded certain renovations ; hence the move, and but
a brief period left to us of the wearing of that " grey 77 we
so loved and approved.

On sturdy shoulders bore we our poor belongings to
that pleasant domicil in the "First Div./ 7 which should be
our home till we turned away our eyes forever, and
should, with wandering feet, thread strange and unknown
ways ; for the "old familiar places 77 would truly u soon

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

323

know us no more;" we should outer into those ' via
diversce" some of which have even now led into the quiet
and dark valley, where man loseth for eternity his knowl-
edge of the uplands of life.

It was the season of Nature's awakening; sweet forces
were distributing that chill and frozen equilibrium which
locked us in the iron grasp of winter ; the birds, happy

bright-plum aged, were coming back to the eln
eaves were rustling tenderly in the fluttering breezes of
spring, and here and there delicate-eyed blossoms spoke
of a fruit-crowned harvest. Softly, silently, these occult
influences had gathered in beautiful array : Xatu:
inertia gave way before their gentle but earnest striving,
and this fairy result was expressed in a " change of state "
which could not have been other than satisfactory to our
dear old Professor of Philosophy, whom I have often fancied
sighing for a floral mathematics in which to express the
set formulae of spring, the charming "equations of con-
dition." giving us those lovely progressive states of the
great function Xatu re.

Ah! I have said to myself, it is almost a temptation to
man to wish for the advent of that time when this high
calculus of the eternal living force shall be made known to
us.

Why read we not more reverently the pages we may
fmd traced on the living green of the frest. carved upon
the everlasting rocks, and written with mighty pen on
the awful, ever-open book of the ocean ?

Mamon and I were happy in this temporary abode <f
ours; the days sped quickly away. Brisk preparations

324 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

for the examination kept our minds in trim, while the
smart afternoon drills and parades gave us the needful
exercise. I was an undeniably lazy man, but those May
mornings sweet and tender too glad was I to enjoy the
early walks, to note the growing foliage as it took warmer
tints day by day, and to see the delicate touches of beauty
stealing over the freshening face of the dear old Point.

Made she herself fairer than ever for us that year ? I
fondly thought so ! So we were happy, with a quiet,
tranquil sense of deeper joys to come.

In the warm evenings we sat under the shades of the
elms in front of Barracks ; time-honored songs were sung
in happy chorus, and later, with open windows, we lis-
tened to the brisk tattoo as the drum-corps marched
over the parade lawn. One more day would disappear
from our fantastic calendar, and day by day we found a
sense of unreality steal into our lives, for we felt like pup-
pets in a mighty play.

Four years of isolation from the world caused us to look
forward to the day of release as if we were " going out of
the house of bondage." Little did we think that we were
leaving healthful occupation without possibility of being
overtasked, honorable position without severe responsi-
bility, and that our local code, in its surface severity, was
kind and genial, as the great world's rules never are. I've
learned since to look back with tender regret on that last
month as the happiest period of my life. Now do I know
why those pleasant things "brightened;" it was that the}'
" took their leave'' to never come again.

In these times of preparations were we not towers of

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 325

pecuniary strength, and did we not pmvha-e many arti-
cles evidently used only by Chaplains. Brigadier-Generals,
and other people who serve their country in a strictly
ornamental way?

Damon and I are not ornamental in the above sen>e.
and those articles, in my trunk yet (duplicates pserd
by Damon), prove to me that there are things which
" abide always." We were " spoiled, 77 as the wise Hebr-
did the Egyptians in days of yore.

Study ended ; all our preparations were made ; tin- re
was little left that man might do in the way of lt boning,"
to meet the coming ordeal.

Time brought the first of June our June! the usual
salute announced the arrival of the Board of Visitor-,
members of which, with solemn faces and suspiciously
shiny hats, were to be seen wandering about arm in arm
with local dignitaries. Mem. "Did they oil those hate ?"
I cannot soon forget how my heart gave a big jump as the
mellow voice of the Officer of the Day sounded in the halls
turning out the "First Section, First Class, Engine. -ri:
But, one phase of the ordeal passed, we took courage ; our
i minat ion proceeded without special excitement. The
music in the evenings, as the notes of the serenading bands
would steal in at our open windows, was a sad distraction;
high dignitaries, military and civil, convulsed our little
world with the excitement of several large whales in one
narrow and restricted tub. Last, but by no means the
least distracting influence, was the saucy tluttej- of dimity
among the trees, the winsome -lances of briirh -iris

who Authored for the glories of our graduating hop.

326 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

There was a great deal of " hurrying to and fro ; " this
" to-and-fro " business relating to the hotel, which was for
the time a spacious casket of these lovely jewels. I shall
pass lightly over the defection of these aforesaid " shining
ones/ 7 when those jolly yet fascinating " Middies '' arrived
" all from the raging seas."

Did we not fraternize with those who undid us ? Was
it not cor unum, by a happy coincident phrase of our class
motto ?

They rivalled us in brilliant parades on the plain, and
mutual entertainment was the order of the day.

Their examinations were over, and they had naught to
do but enter whole-souled into this genial contest of the
Blue and the Grey. The gallant embryo Jack Tars, while
we were finishing our examinations, rolled nautically
ashore, jammed their respective helms hard-a-port, steered
for the hotel, where so many fascinating figure-heads
attracted the sailor's eye, laid violent sentimental grap-
plings on these lovely craft, the cut of whose jibs they so
heartily approved, and lurched heavily into their affections.
I know not if 'twere well done, but I can wager with great
moral serenity that 'twas done quickly. I'm not preach-
ing a sermon on that ancient text il souvent femme vaine."
I am chronicling facts ; let it go at that.

Finally, when, last of all the studies, Cavalry Tactics
was called up, I felt, as I laid down my pointer in the
examining-hall at the words, " That will do! sir," that
I was freed from the great burden of care and study at
last.

I returned to my room, put all my books in my pack-

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

ing-boxes, tilled my pipe, ami grinned horribly at I>amon,
who was just going to the hall. I was five ; turning on
the mental-escape valve, I allowed myself rest IVom all
thought. And it was delicious rest, well earned, honestly
enjoyed.

Elder and better soldiers, with more facile pens, have
described the Graduating Hop a dream oi' delight, a
moving picture, a lovely unreality it seemed to me.

The presentation of diplomas I felt as a great ceremony,
for was not the honored hand of the Great Captain who
struck treason its death-blow, extended to mo with my
hard-earned diploma as an offering? Better than that .
I felt, could I not glance at the row of visitors, and
the eyes of a mother and a sister glistening with tears of
pride and joy ?

These were the honors that touched our young hearts,
and in the silence of my room I felt they were great, and
that the rewards were ample.

The last serenade with its sweet farewell music, I can-
not speak of without emotion ; did not our heart- go fnrth
to each other that night, and were not small fends and
jealousies forgotten in the presence of the quiet stars and
the sweet harmonies ?

The boat-race, first of the Academy series, honestly
and lovallv rowed, was a triumph for us. A calm and
lovely afternoon, fitting preparations, and interested spec-
tators gave the scene -Teat attractions. We of the 1
Class Leathered together on one of the wharves, and when
our six-oar rowed by to take its place, they Game near US,
moved by a touch of that indefinable cravi -ympu-

328 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

thetic support as our representatives in the tough contest
about to ensue.

Did they not receive a hearty cheer, and when it was
whispered that " Colossus" in the middle of the boat was
afraid his wind wouldn't last him, did not some fortunate
idea impel some one to propose a cheer for the ' ' man
with the big arm ? "

Perhaps he didn't get a rouser, and from an intimate
knowledge, perhaps I didn't feel that our boat, weak at
no point, was certainly strong amidships !

The pistol was fired, away they leaped like hounds on
the chase, a short period hid those wasp-like shells, and
all we could see was the flashing oars. At last a boat
turned the stake buoy ! "Wild excitement reigned as they
were seen, black lines, broadening slowly. Didn't enthusi-
astic classmates loyally take every wager offered against
us ? Our eager eyes were strained to see the hue of the
head-handkerchiefs of the advancing six-oar which led
victoriously.

When we saw the " blue " ahead, there was one wild
burst of joy, and as those laboring oarsmen caught that
cheer, the boat seemed to take gigantic leaps, till in the
calm, smooth water over the line they rested on their
oars, wondering at the light of battle in each other's eyes.

Those blue colors they wore must have been dyed with
"forget-me-nots," for there's not a " '68 " man who can
ever lose that scene from memory.

After this did we not repair to the confectioners for ice-
cream ? of a verity, I ate mine from a gravy-boat with
a mustard-spoon, and I think Damon had his in the cover

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

of a soap-dish. That happy crowd, most of 11
fresco, on the lawn in front of the little shop will nev.-r
meet again! u Impossible " has its in unini:. sad and

I irrevocable enough !
The last parade, beautiful and solemn, passed like a
dream. I was Officer of the Day, but from choice did I
go to that parade, and march to the front with the
Colossus of our racing crew and Damon, for right and left
hand supporters. As we took our hats off in salute to
our honored Commandant, I felt a rending in my breast
as of some chord in my being snapping. I was no longer
a cadet, and after reveille of the morrow I would have no
place there as my own. I looked at the gold lace on my
arms. I knew who would wear those chevrons, and I felt
that there was a new order of things, earnestly destroying
day by day the romance of the old.

Let me pass to the evening to which we had so long
looked forward. The reveille would bring us our release.
We felt as we broke ranks that night from supper that we
should march no more in the grey battalion. It was like
being a u stranger in a strange land." After my evening
duties were ended, I repaired to my room. The Barracks
were almost deserted ; there was a ball on the vessels of
the Practice Fleet. All was quiet ; in my room, dear old
Damon awaited me he, who for years had made my cai
his own, and had heartily, generously, and warmly irhvn
me the best backing that man could wish for.

Did not the force of these obligations come to my mind,
as I saw him through the open door sitting with his head
upon his hand? Save Colossus, IK- \\a> my only true

330 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

friend. We three had fancifully called ourselves " the
triangle/ 7 and I do not know that any of us have lost in
distant spheres of duties a jot of the old feeling. I have
been with Damon much since that time, and thank Grod !
the great bond of friendship between us is firmer knit
year by year. I know him now as of old by the heart
brevets of comrade and brother. Friend and associate of
my labors, he went hand in hand with me when the way
was dark. It is only his unquestioning devotion that
proves to me, man may unselfishly love and serve his
brother man. He has been with me since, when anxieties,
doubts, and troubles made the couch on the ground an
uneasy one, and his manly honesty and generous kindness
hold me captive yet, as in those days when he made me,
a raw boy, his debtor for life.

I cannot tell him these things perhaps, but the words
may meet his eyes and he must plead guilty to this indict-
ment.

I went into the disordered room, littered with trunks
and boxes, took off my equipments, and sat down to
report myself for the solemn introspective festival !

A well-filled tobacco jar was the magazine of these
visions, dreams, and memories, in which we were to revel.
The light of years reflected from the glass of experience
was to form smoke pictures for us, fanciful yet true.
Long did we talk of many a friend, hour, and scene.

It was late when we betook ourselves to contemplation,
silent and earnest. I wandered through cloud-land till
memory, earnest-eyed and wistful, took me by the hand
and led me backward over the winding life-path of the

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK. 331

four years. I saw many things in the silence of that
night. I felt again the eager joy with which I tore opt-n
an ominous-looking envelope marked " War Dep V and
found therein my conditional appointment.

The earnest family consultations that followed, the
parting day, the sinking of the heart with which I looked
at the dear group on the porch of my pleasant country
home by the far Pacific, the waving handkerchiefs as I
looked back, and my swelling heart coming into my
throat as a bend in the road shut the familiar landscape
from sight all these things came back as sharp and clear
as the lines of an antique bronze.

Slowly my mind recalled the incidents of a tedious sea-
voyage, the hurry and bustle of the great Gothamite
wilderness, and I felt again the heat and burden of that
August day when I toiled up the winding road from West
Point landing.

I refilled my pipe with an exquisite sense of triumph
and comfort, as I thought of the stern mandate of that
Hotel clerk who told me to report at once after dining ;
a brief interview at the Adjutant's office, then entered I
into that hot and dusty camp, whose sights and sounds
unfamiliar by day seemed unearthly by night. The awful
ordeal of preliminary examination over, camp was broken
up, we occupied Barracks ; and a bare room in 4 he angle,
elegantly furnished with an iron bed and table, togrthrr
with Davies' Bourdon, and French's Grammar, re<-< -ivi-d
me

My uniform I donned with pride, and I could feel on
that last night a dim reflection of the glories of the ii

332 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

parade. Time crawled away. The genial Sioux, who
sportively slew the mail driver on the distant plains, and
tore up the letters of iny family that Fall, taught me the
virtue of self-reliance, for it was months before I even
received the vague encouragement of friends unfamiliar
with the hard and bitter trials of cadet life.

January came with its examination ; one day we were
solemnly "sworn in" to the service, by an officer, whose
face, familiar to me since, was then one of supernatural
gravity; he seemed the embodiment of a military penalty.

These, and many more incidents I remembered ; the
annual egg day, the extremely slow festivals of the place ;
I suffered again the cheerful pangs of " walking extras "
with soleless shoes, because I was in debt on check-book.
All these thoughts crowded on my mind as I sat looking
at Damon, who had a very far-off look in his eyes.

Shadows chased one another. I saw myself as an am-
bitious "yearling/' with the brilliant gold stripes of a
corporal. I have thought often of the remark of Marshal
Vaillant, who, passing consecutively through all the grades
of the French service, from Cadet to Field-Marshal, replied
promptly, being asked what grade pleased him most,
" Corporal at the Ecole Poly technique ! " I can under-
stand the corporal business, I think, though I have not yet
experienced the temptations of very lofty rank. Shall I
ever forget that pleasant summer day when our Com-
mandant remarked, on calling me away from my squad of
three Plebes, remarkable for uniformity and angular nob-
biness, that there " were different degrees of voice used in
drilling troops a man might have a brigade, a regiment,

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

333

battalion, company, platoon, or small squad, and that it
hardly necessary to shout at three men as if they
were a brigade ! "

It was gravel where I was this accounts for my not
disappearing under the surface. I touched my hat in a
distant manner, and whispered solemnly to those Plebes,
whose grins attested the fact of their sharp hearing. I
lost the thread of my musings ; it seemed, for a strange
panorama glided before me, camp and Barracks, old cadet
feelings, furlough and u Phil." all these things were there
with touches of a serious nature. My dawning friendship
with Damon, many exciting scenes, exercises, and
periences the passing of that funeral train with its precious
freight of the body of a martyred President, Abraham
Lincoln, the hero of the war ; the death and funeral of the
grand old warrior, Scott ; the flying visits, from the Hold.
of great Generals ; all these things were seen as in a g!
darkly, and the chequered record of the cadet life unrolled
its length before me.

I lived over again the hours of despair, when tired of
work, and striving against bitter inclemency of \veath<T.
1 almost gave up everything; in short, I tasted the pi.
uivs of the past again, and bore the burden of its not un-
{VeMjUent sorrows.

A sad story shaped itself into a picture I can never for-
get in its vivid colors and intensity of outlii

It was the old story of a love : the ivinomhramv of it
brought that quiet night, the hush of its emotion* to my
heart, and its sorrows, claimed me once more. Th< story
was my own, and began in this wise, that "it came to

334 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

pass " (would it had passed, and never come) that an un-
kind fate brought us together.

In my dreamland I lived over again the May-time in
which I met her, that fair time when her sweet eyes
claimed the empire of my thoughts. I knew her only as
the " Little One." I felt she was the priestess of my des-
tiny. To be near her, to be with her, became the object
of my life. From careless boyhood I passed with a bound
into earnest striving manhood, in feeling at least. Foolish
boy-heart, it was to delude itself with fair ideas of honest
ambition forcing me onward and upward to a place from
which I could reach the lovely prize. The story is not
new, but it has always had, and, perhaps, will ever retain,
a personal interest for me of a high order.

The stars have looked down on me in many a night-
watch since that time they have not yet whispered me the
secret of forgetfulness.

I have not lost from memory, nor can I ever, that time
we sat together, where we could hear the singing river far
below murmur in a sweet minor key. To the friendly
accompaniment of that gentle music, the current of my
heart broke out in speech honest, tender, and, need I say,
as the world goes, foolish ?

But I saw in my dream once more the beautiful eyes,
happy with good tidings, as they told me the story that
needs not words. It was but a brief space, this happiness
of mine.

Afterward I sat for the better part of an academic year,
three times a week, where I could note the exact spot
where she stood that night, when we strayed away from

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

335

:
r

the dancers, and she looked into my eyes with -lances I
felt were honest and true reflections of her soul, and told

e to strive and struggle for her. The music of that
night echoes strangely sometimes, and I have seen in many
dreams, as on that last night in Barracks, a fair young
girl, whose sweet face and golden hair were stra:
lovely in the light of a wandering moonbeam that sought
her out as if it loved her ; those eyes, burning, yet tender,
will never look as frankly into mine again as on that night.
If I met her I think they would be turned away ; I think
I should know why !

Time took to himself cruel wings, and she passed from
me, a dream of loveliness. Her picture, once I had; 1 have
it not now, save in my heart, where it is drawn in colors
fadeless and enduring. She passed over the seas, and it
were better had she gone before. She might not then
have taken with her a richness from the sunlight it lias
never had since. Many of my heart-friends went with her;
Hope and Faith, hand in hand, went out across the world
with those little feet, and they came not back again. She
was far from me, and I learned, alter months of intense
toil, that change and silence could divide us by a distance
great in comparison with the great circle arcs of our poor
sphere. I thought in my musings of the many winter
nights, when my light burned into the midnight hours,
and, when tired and exhausted. I would look out of my
window at the silent, gloomy buildings, and watch the
gival white stars sweep on in their circles, asking them
questions which were answered not. It was well ; the
Stars were kind and silent! Ah! how tb

336 WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

months dragged away ! The quiet hours of the last night
in Barracks impressed me ; I thought of the wide world
with its infinity of pathetic tragedies of every-day life,
beside which the tinselled unrealities of the drama are
poor and mean. I was soon to take an active part in the
affairs of that world beyond the hills that had imprisoned
me so long. Memory, looking at the path whence went
away from me that beloved and never returning wanderer,
told me I should be in the arena of life, alone and without
aid.

Surely , my musings tended only to bring out the dark
shades of sorrow and trouble. Sad-eyed memory went
from my side. I heard the silver voice of Friendship,
clear and strong, as the song of the morning lark, " Look
up ! " I did so ; my eyes rested on Damon. " Alone ! "
said I "never! while I have his hearty honest love."
Then his thoughts strangely tending toward me as mine
to him ? we quietly clasped hands, and looking towards the
eastern sky, where the morning star burned serenely, we
saw the promise of a brighter day the future in every
way lighted up by friendly kindness and mutual faith. A
silence, deep and abiding, soon reigned in our room, for I
had whispered to my pillow, for the last time, the beloved
name that had haunted my slumber so long - . And
the sunlight brought us our freedom.

A VOCABULARY

OF THE

EXPRESSIONS AND PHRASES

USED IN TUB

CORPS OF CADETS,

NIMAL. A name given to new Cadets on their arrival.

BEAST. A name also applied to new Cadets.

BONE. To "bone" to study to imitate.

BONING ADJUTANT. Being excessively military.

BONING MUSCLE. Exercising in the Gymnasium.

BOMNU CORPORAL. A Plebe afraid of being reported.

BONING DEMERIT. Keeping from being reported.

To BUGLE IT. To keep from reciting until the bugle blows.

BABE. Name given to the youngest man in the class.

To BONE STANDING. To study hard for a class position.

COCKLOFT. The upper story in the Barracks.

CONFINKMF.NT. A punishment given to Cadets, keeping them in
quarters Saturdays.

DAD. Name given to the oldest man in the class.

To DEVIL A PLEBE. To abuse, impose upon, or torment him.

KXTUA. Walking sentinel's post on extra tour of guard-duty, on
Saturday, or Sunday, as a punishment.

FEM. A woman girl young lady.

Fri;r.ouGH-MEN. Those Cadets just going off on furlough, or just
returning.

FAST ANIMAL. A Plebe who puts on airs.

To FESS. To make a poor recitation.

WEST POINT SCRAP-BOOK.

To FESS PERFECTLY FRIGID. To know nothing about a lesson.

To FESS ON A CLEAN BOARD. Same as the above.

To FIZZLE. To do middling well rather poorly.

FOUND ON MATH. Found deficient in mathematics.

FOUND ON DEMERIT. Having more than the limit (100).

GURTSEY. Name given to the fattest man in the class.

GRAVE-ORCHARD. The mouth.

HIVED PERFECTLY FRIGID. Caught without a chance of escape.

HEFTY SKIN. A severe report.

HASH. Supper cooked in room after taps.

HUNKEY. Magnificent superb.

HUNKEY BOY WITH A TIN EAR. A lucky fellow.

JUDGE. The most popular man.

KEEN. A joke a witty saying.

MATCHES. A tall, thin person.

PERFECTLY DEMMY. Very stylish well-dressed.

PERFECTLY REGARDLESS. Regardless of expense.

PLEBE. A new Cadet a fourth-class man.

PINK. A report for some offence.

A REPTILE. A name applied to new Cadets.

A RABID BEAST. An impertinent Plebe.

RECKLESS. Reckless careless daring.

RICOCHET. Gay splendid.

SEP. A Cadet who comes in September.

SKIN. A report same as Pink.

SPOONS. Lady-love sweetheart.

SPOONEY MAN. A ladies' man.

SPOONEY LETTER. A love-letter.

To SPOONEY. To make love.

To GET EXCESSIVELY SPOONEY. To fall deeply in love.

STAG-DANCE. A comical dance by Cadets in camp.

To GET OFF A KEEN. To make a witty remark.

To GET PINKED. To get reported.

To GET SKINNED. Same as the above.

To CABBAGE. To take a thing without permission.

W!>T POINT h'CRAP-BOOK.

To HIVE. To appropriate same as the above.

To GET HIVED. To get caught in a scrape.

To WHEATON IT. To get excused from duty l>y tin- Surgeon. The
expression first came into vogue, at the time a Dr. Wheuton \\;ts
Surgeon at the Academy, who was very lenient to the Cad. ta.

To CUT ROLL-CALL. To be absent from roll-call, purposely.

To MAX IT. To make a perfect recitation.

To MAKE A COLD MAX. Same as the above.

To RAG OUT. To recite perfectly; also, to dress well.

To HAVE A COLD THING. To be perfectly sure of something.

To FREEZE TO A THING. To secure to hold fast.

To RUN IT. To go off Cadet limits without permission

YEARLING. A third-class man.

A DEMMY CIT. A stylish, well-dressed citizen.

LEGS. A tall, spare, angular man.

BEAUTY. Generally the homeliest man.

BALDY. A name given to a man who has very little hair on his
head.

TUBS. Name given to a very fat man.

CHIN-MUSIC. Talk.

A GULF-SPIN. A worthless fellow.

MILITARY BOOKS.

ILITARY AND POLITICAL LIFE OF THE EMPEROR
NAPOLEON. By BARON JOMINI, General-in-Chief and Aid-de-
Camp to the Emperor of Russia. Translated from the French, with
notes, by H. W. HALLECK, LL. D., Major-General U. S. Army. 4
vols., royal 8vo. With an Atlas of 60 Maps and Plans. Cloth,
$25; Half-Calf or Morocco, $35; Half-Russia, $37.50.

" The Atlas attached to this version of JOMINI'S Napoleon adds very materially to its value, ft
contains sixty Maps, illustrative of Napoleon's extraordinary military career, beginning with the
Immortal Italian campaigns of 1796, and closing with the decisive Campaign of Flanders, in 1815,
the last map showing the battle of Wavre. These maps take the reader to Italy, Egypt, Pales-
tine, Germany, Moravia, Russia, Spain, Portugal, and Flanders ; and their number and variety,
and the vast and various theatres of action which they indicate, testify to the immense extent
of Napoleon's operations, and to the gigantic character of his power. They are admirably pre-
pared, being as remarkable for the beauty of their execution as for their strict fidelity as illus-
trations of some of the greatest deeds in the annals of human warfare. They are worthy of the
work to which they belong, which has been most excellently presented typographically, and de-
serving of the place which it has taken in Mr. Van Nostrand's noble and extensive library of
military publications." Boston Daily Evening Traveller.

" It is needless to say anything in praise of JOMINI as a writer on the science of war.

44 General HALLECK has laid the professional soldier and the student of military history und<*
equal obligations by the service he has done to the cause of military literature in the preparation
of this work for the press. His rare qualifications for the task thus undertaken will te ac
krowledged by all.

* The notes with which the text is illustrated by General HALLECK are not among the least ot
the merits of the publication, which, in this respect, has a value not possessed by the original
work." National Intelligencer.

" The narrative is so brief and clear, and the style so simple and perspicuous, that it will b
found as interesting to unprofessional readers as it is valuable to military officers and student* "
N-ew York Times.

%* This is the only English translation of this important strategical life of the great Napoleom.

HE POLITICAL AND MILITARY HISTORY OF THE
CAMPAIGN OF WATERLOO. Translated from the French
of General BARON DE JOMINI. By Col. S. V. BENET, U. S. Ord
nance, i vol., I2mo, cloth. Third edition. $1.25.

Books. 3

RF ATFS-R OX GRAND MILITARY OPERATIONS. Illustrated
by a Critical and Military History of the Wars of Frederick the
Great. With a summary of the most important principles of the Art
of War. I-'v BARON DE JOMIXI. Illustrated by Maps and Plans.
Translated from the French by Col. S. B. HOLABIRD, A. D. C., U. S.
Army. In 2 vols., Svo, and Atlas. Cloth, $15; Half-Calf or Half-
Morocco, $21 ; Half-Russia, $22.50

" It is uii'versally agreed that no art or science is more difficult than that of war ; yet by an
nnaccountable contradiction of the human mind, those who embrace this profession take little
or no pains' to study it. They see-in to think that the knowledge of a few insignificant and use-
less trilK's ronptitute a preat officer. This art, like all others, is founded on certain and *xed
principle?, which are by their nature invariable ; t/te application of them only can be varied."

In this work tli-se principles will he found very fully developed and illustrated by immediate
application to the most interesting campaigns of a great master. The theoretical and mechani-
cal part of war m;iy be acquired by any one who has the application to study, powers of reflec-
tion, and a sound, clear common sense.

Frederick the (iivat i:as the credit of having done much for tactics. He introduced the close
column by division and deployments therefrom. He brought his army to a higher decree ol
ekill than any other in mamenvring before the enemy to menace his wings or threaten his flanks.

SCOTT'S MILITARY DICTIONARY. Comprising Technical
Definitions ; Information on Raising and Keeping Troops ; Ac-
tual service, including makeshifts and improved materiel, and Law,
Government, Regulation, and Administration relating to Land
Forces. By Colonel H. L. SCOTT, Inspector-General U. S. A. I
vol., large Svo, fully illustrated. Half-Morocco, 86 ; Half-Russia,
; Full-Morocco, $10.

44 It is a complete Encyclopedia of Military Science, and fully explains everything discovered
In the art of war up to the present time." Phikulelphia Evening Bulletin.
" It should be made a text-book for the study of every volunteer." Harper's Magazine.

CAVALRY ; ITS HISTORY, MANAGEMENT, AND USES
IN WAR. By ]. ROEMER, LL.D., late an Officer of Cavalry in
the Service of the Netherlands. Elegantly illustrated, with one hun-
dred and twenty-seven fine wood-engravings. In one large octavo
volume, beautifully printed on tinted paper. Cloth, $6 ; Half-calf,
$7.50.

SUMMARY OF CONTENTS. Cavalry in European Armies; Proportion of
ilry to Infantry; What kind of Cavalry desirable ; Cavalry indis-
j.<:n<i'i)le in War; Strategv and Tactics; Organization of an Army;
Route Marches ; Rifled Fire-Anas ; The Charge ; The Attack ; Cav-
alry versus Cavalry ; Cavalry versus Infantry ; Cavalry versus Artillery ;
; Service; Different Objects of Cavalry; Historical Sketches of
Cavalry among the early Greeks, the Romans, the Middle Ages ; Dif-
ferent kinds of Modern Cavalry ; Soldiers and Officers ; Various sys-
tems of Training of Cavalry Horses ; Remounting; Shoeing; Veter-
inary Surgeons, Saddlery, etc., etc.

WHAT GENFRAL M'CLEI.LAN SATS OF IT.

* I an exceedingly pleased with it. and regard it M a very valnab?e addition to our militftr* 1

hterali re. It will certainly hi- re-anli-d as a >tsnd:in! work. :md I know of none so valuable tf

our cavalry otlicers. Its usefulness, however, is nut confined to ortldT* of cavalry alone, blK J

contains a -re it deal of _-en-ral information valuable to the officer* of the other arm* of tcrv,

.ill* those of the Stall'.''

4 D. ~[ r an Nbstrand j s Publications.

NOLAN'S SYSTEM FOR TRAINING CAVALRY HORSES
By KENNER GARRARD, Captain Fifth Cavalry, Bvt. Brig. -Gen.
U. S. A. i vol., I2mo, cloth. 24 lithographed plates. $2.

C COKE'S CAVALRY TACTICS ; or, Regulations for the Instruc-
tion, Formations, and Movements of the Cavalry of the Army and
Volunteers of the United States. 100 illustrations, 12010. Cloth, $i.

PATTEN'S CAVALRY DRILL. Containing Instructions on Fool ;
Instruction on Horseback ; Basis of Instruction ; School of the
Squadron, and Sabre Exercise. 93 Engravings. 12 mo, paper.
50 cents.

ELEMENTS OF MILITARY ART AND HISTORY. By EDWARD
DE LA BARRE DUPARCQ, Chef de Bataillon of Engineers in the Army
of France, and Professor of the Military Art in the Imperial School
of St. Cyr. Translated by Brigadier-General GEO. W. CULLUM, U.
S. A., Chief of the Staff of Major-General H. W. HALLECK, General-
in-Chief U. S. Army. I vol., 8vo, cloth. $5.

" I read the original a few years since, and considered it the very best -ork I nad seen upoj
Ihe subject. General Cullum's ability and familiarity with the technical , -ejuage of French mil-
itary writers, are a sufficient guarantee of the correctness of hi? translation

" H. W. HALLECK, Major-general U. S. A."

" I have read the book with great interest, and trust that it will have a large circulation. I*
cannot fail to do good by spreading that very knowledge, the want of which among our new, in
"rperienced, and untaught soldiers, has cost us so many lives, and so much toil and treasure.

"M. C. MEIGS, Quartermaster-General U. S. A."

HPHE CIVIL AND MILITARY ENGINEERS OF AMERICA.
* By Gcn'l CHARLES B. STUART, Author of "Naval Dry Docks of the

United States," &c., &c. Embellished with several finefy executed
portraits on steel of eminent engineers, and illustrated by engravings
of some of the most important and original works constructed in
America. 8vo. Cloth. $5.

WEST POINT SCRAP BOOK. Being a Collection of Legends,
Stories, Songs, &c. By Lieut. O. E. WOOD, U. S. A. Profusely
illustrated. Beautifully printed on tinted paper. 8vo. Cloth. 5.

THE PRINCIPLES OF STRATEGY AND GRAND TACTICS.
Translated from the French of General G. H. DLJFOUR. By
WILLIAM P. CRAIGHILL, Captain of Engineers U. S. Army, and
Assistant Professor of Engineering, U. S. Military Academy, West
Point. From the last French edition. Illustrated. In I vol.,
I2mo, cloth. $3.

*' General Dufour is a distinguished civil and military engineer and a practical soldier, and ia
Europe one of the recognized authorities on military matters. He holds the office of Chief cl
the General Staff of the Army of Switzerland." Evening Post.

44 Tula work upon the principles of strategy, the application of which we have sorely stood la
eed of in all our campaigns, comes from an acknowledged authority. It was General Dufonf
ho successfully arrayed the Federal Army of Switzerland against secession, and 'su'xlued
the rebellious Cantons.' 1 Bos ton Journal.

Military

RMY OFFICERS' POCKET COMPANION. Principally de-
signed for Staff Officers in the Field. Partly translated from the
French of M. DE ROUVRE, Lieutenant-Colonel of the French Staff
Corps, with Additions from standard American, French, and English
authorities. By WM. P. CRAIGHILL, First-Lieutenant U. S. Coipa
of Engineers, Assistant Professor of Engineering at the U. S. Mili-
tary Academy, West Point, i vol., iSmo, full roan. $2.

I have carefnlly examined Captain Craighill's Pocket Companion. I find it ore of the very
best work? of the kind I have ever seen. Any army or volunteer officer who will make himscll
acquainted with the contents of this little book will seldom be ignorant of his duties in camp ol
field. "II. W. HALLECK. Major-General U. S. A."

" I have carefully examined the ' Manna! for Staff Officers in the Field.' It is a moat invalua-
ble work, admirable in arrangement, perspicuously written, abounding in most useful matters,
and such a book as should be the constant pocket-companion of every army officer, Regular and
Volunteer. "G. W. CULLUM, Bri-adier-General U. S. A.,

"Chief of General Halleck's Staff, Chief Engineer Department Mississippi."

AXIMS AND INSTRUCTIONS ON THE ART OF WAR.
A Practical Military Guide for the use of Soldiers of all Arms
and of all Countries. Translated from the French by Captain LENDY,
Director of the Practical Military College, late of the French Staff,
etc., etc. i vol., iSmo, cloth. 75 cents.

ISTORY OF WEST POINT, and its Military Importance during
the American Revolution ; and the Origin and Prcgress of the
United States Military Academy. By Bvt.-Maj. EDWARD C. BOYXION,
A. M., Adjutant of the Military Academy. Second Edition, with
numerous Maps and Engravings, i vol., octavo. Cloth, $3.50.

"Aside from its value as an historical record, the volume nnder notice is an entertaining
guide-book to the Military Academy and its nurronndings. We have full details of Cad ft life
from the day of entrance to that of graduation, together with descriptions of the bui. dings,
grounds, and monuments. To the multitude of those who have enjoyed at West Point the com-
bined attractions, this book will give, in its descriptive and illustrated portion, especial plea*
are. 1 ' New York Evening Post.

"The second part of the book gives the history of the Military Academy from its foundation
in 1^-J. a description of the academic buildings, and the appearance to-day of this always bean-
tiful spot, with the manner of appointment of the cadets, course of study, pay, time of service,
and much other information yearly becoming of greater value, for West Point has uot yet
reached its palmiest days." Daily Advertiser.

WEST POINT LIFE. A poem read before the Dialectic Society
of the United States Military Academy. Illustrated with
twenty-two full-page Pen and Ink Sketches. By a CADET. To
which is added, the song, "Benny Havens, Oh 1" Oblong 8vo.,
cloth, bevelled boards, $2.50.

GUIDE TO WEST POINT AND THE U. S. MILITARY ACAEV
EMY. With Maps and Engravings. iSmo., cloth, $i.

ti D. Van No sir and 1 s Publications.

BENTON'S ORDNANCE AND GUNNERY. A Course of In.
struction in Ordnance and Gunnery ; compiled for the use of
the Cadets of the United States Military Academy, by Col. J. G.
BENTON, Major Ordnance Department, late Instructor of Ordnance
and Gunnery, Military Academy, West Point. Third Edition, re-
vised and enlarged, i vol., 8vo, cloth, cuts, $5.

" A GREAT MILITARY WORK. We have before us a bound volume of nearly six hundred

puses, which is a compete and exhaustive ' Course of Instruction in Ordnance and Gunnery,'
s its title states, and goes into every department of the science, including gunpowder, pro-
jectiles, cannon, carriages, machines, and implements, small-arms, pyrotechny, science of gun-
nery, loading, pointing, and discharging firearms, different kinds of fires, effects of projectiles
and employment of artillery. These severally form chapter heads, and give thorough informa-
tion on the subjects on which they treat. The most valuable and interesting information
on all the above topics, including the history, manufactu' 1 ^, and use of small-arms, is here con-
centrated in compact and convenient form, making a work of rare merit and standard excel-
.ence. The work is abundantly and clearly illustrated." Boston Traveller.

ELECTRO-BALLISTIC MACHINES, AND THE SCHULTZ CHRONO-
' SCOPE. By Lt.-Col. S. V. BENET. i vol., 4to, illustrated, cloth,
$3-

A TREATISE ON ORDNANCE AND ARMOR. Embracing De-
scriptions, Discussions, and Professional Opinions concerning the
Material, Fabrication, Requirements, Capabilities, and Endurance
of European and American Guns for Naval, Sea-Coast, and Iron-
Clad Warfare, and their Rifling, Projectiles, and Breech-Loading ;
also, Res.'ilts of Experiments against Armor, from Official Records.
With an Appendix, referring to Gun-Cotton, Hooped Guns, etc.,
etc. By ALEXANDER L. HOLLEY, B. P. With 493 Illustrations.
i vol. Svo, 948 pages. Half roan, $10. Half Russia, $12.

" The special feature of this comprehensive volume is its ample record of facts relating to the
Bub.iects of which it treats, that have not before been distinctly presented to the attention of the
public. It contains a more complete account than, as far as we are aware, can be found else-
where, of the construction and effects of modern standard ordnance, including the improve-
ments of Armstrong, Whitworth, Blakeley, Parrott. Brooks, Rodman, and Dahlgren; the wrought-
Iroa and steel uns; and the latest system of rifling projectiles and breech-loading.

HP HE ARTILLERIST'S MANUAL. Compiled from various;
J- Sources, and adapted to the Service of the United States. Pro-
fusely illustrated with woodcuts and engravings on stone. Second
edition, revised and corrected, with valuable additions. By Gen.
JOHN GIBBON, U. S. Army, i vol., Svo, half roan, $6.

This book is now considered the standard authority for that particular branch
of the Service in the United States Army. The War Department, at Wash-
ington, has exhibited its thorough appreciation of the merits cf this volume, the
waiit of which has been hitherto much felt in the service, by subscribing for
700 copies.

" It is with great pleasure that we welcome the appearance of a new work on this subject,
entitled k The Artillerist's Manual,' by Capt. John Gibbon, a highly scientific and meritorious
officer of artillury in our regular service. The work, an octavo volume of 500 pages, in large,
c)<iar type, appears to be well adapted to supply just what has been heretofore needed to fill the
gap between the simple manual and the more abstruse demonstrations of the science of gunnery.
The whole work is profusely illustrated with woodcuts and engravings on stone, tending to give
a more complete and exact idea of the various matters described in me text The book may
well be considered as a valuable and important addition to the military science of the country."
New York Herald.

Military Books.

AND-BOOK OF ARTILLERY. For the Service of the United
States Army and Militia. Ninth edition, revised and greatly en-
larged. By Col. JOSEPH ROBERTS, U. S. A. i vol., iSmo, cloth,
$1.25-

The following is an extract from a report made by the committee appointed
at a mooting of the staff of the Artillery School at Fort Monroe, Va., to whom
the commanding officer of the School had referred this work :

* * * "In the opinion of your Committee, the arrangement of the subjects and the selection
of the several questions and answers have been judicious. The work is one which may b
advantageously used for reference by the officers, and ia admirably adapted to the instruction
of non-commissioned officers and privates of artillery.

44 Your Committee do, therefore, recommend that it be snbstitnted as a text-book."
(Signed,) I. VOGDES, Capt. 1st ArtUlery.

(Siirned,) E. O. C. ORD, Capt.. M Artillery.

(Signed,) J. A. IIASK1N, Xvt. Maj. and Capt. 1st Artillery.

NSTRUCTIONS FOR FIELD ARTILLERY. Prepared by a
Board of Artillery Officers. To which is added the "Evolutions
of Batteries," translated from the French, by Brig. -Gen. R. ANDER-
SON, U. S. A. i vol., 1 2 mo, 122 plates. Cloth, $3.

" WAU DEPARTMENT, \

" WASHINGTON, D. C., March 1. 1863. f
' This system of Instruction fr Field Artillery, prepared under direction of the War Depart-
ment, having been approved by the President, is adopted for the instruction of troops when
acting as field artillery.

44 Accordingly, instruction in the same will be given after the method pointed out therein;
und all additions to or departures from the exercise and manoeuvres laid down in the system, are

positively forbidden.

" EDWIN M. ST ANTON,

" Secretary of War."

pATTEN'S ARTILLERY DRILL.

i vol., I2mo, paper, 50 cents.

HEAVY ARTILLERY TACTICS. 1863. Instruction for Heavy
Artillery ; prepared by a Board of Officers, for the use of the
Army of the United States. With service of a gun mounted on an
iron carriage. In i vol., I2mo, with numerous illustrations. Cloth,

$2.50.

"WAR DEPARTMENT.

"WASHINGTON. ]). C.. Oct. 20, 1802. f

"This eystem of Heavy Artillery Tactics, prepared under direction of the- War Department,
having been approved by the President, ia adopted for the instruction of troops when acting ai

"EDWIN M. ST ANTON.

"Secretary of War."

'VOLUTIONS OF FIELD BATTERIES OF ARTILLERY.
* Translated from the French, and arranged for the Army and Mi-
litia of the United States. By Gen. ROBFKT ANDKKSOX, U. S. A.
Published by order of the War Department, i vol., cloth, 32
piates. $i.

3 D. Van Nostrand^s Publications.

GTLLMORE'S FORT SUMTER. Official Report of Operations
against the Defences of Charleston Harbor, 1863. Comprising
the descent upon Morris Island, the demolition of Fort Sumter, and
the siege and reduction of Forts Wagner and Gregg. By Maj.-Gen.
Q. A. GILLMORE, U. S. Volunteers, and Major U. S. Corps of Engi-
neers. With 76 lithographic plates, views, maps, etc. J vol., 8vo.
Cloth, $10 ; Half-Russia, $12.

" General Gillraore has enjoyed and improved some very unusual opportunities for adding to
the literature of military science, and for making a permanent record of his own professional
achievements. It has fallen to his lot to conduct some of the most striking operations of the
war, and to make trial of interesting experiments in engineering and artillery which were both
calculated to throw light upon some of the great points of current discussion in military art, and
also to fix the attention of spectators in no ordinary degree.

" His report of the siege of Fort Pulaski thus almost took the form of a popular scientific
treatise ; and we now have his report of his operations against Forts Wagner and Sumter, given
to the public in a volume which promises to be even more attractive at bottom, both to the
scientific and the general reader, than its predecessor.

"The volume is illustrated by seventy-six plates and views, which are admirably executed,
and by a few excellent maps ; and indeed the whole style of publication is such as to reflect
the highest credit upon the publishers." Boston, Daily Advertiser.

SUPPLEMENTARY REPORT to the Engineer and Artillery Opera*
v3 tions against the Defences of Charleston Harbor in 1863. By

Major-General Q. A. GILLMORE, U. S. Volunteers, and Major U. S.

Corps of Engineers. With Seven Lithographed Maps and Views.

i vol., 8vo. Cloth. $5.

SIEGE AND REDUCTION OF FORT PULASKI, GEORGIA.
Papers on Practical Engineering. No. .8. Official Report to the
U. S. Engineer Department of the Siege and Reduction of Fort Pu-
laski, Ga., February, March, and April, 1862. By Brig. -Gen. Q.
A. GILLMORE, U. S. A. Illustrated by maps and views, i vol.,
8vo, cloth. $2,50.

PRACTICAL TREATISE ON LIMES, HYDRAULIC CE-
MENTS, AND MORTARS. Papers on Practical Engineering,
U. S. Engineer Department, No. 9, containing Reports of numerous
experiments conducted in New York City, during the years 1858 to
1 86 1 inclusive. By Major-General Q. A. GILLMORE, U. S. Volun-
teers, and Major U. S. Corps of Engineers. With numerous illus-
trations. One volume, octavo. Cloth. $4.

SYSTEMS OF MILITARY BRIDGES, in Use by the United States
Army ; those adopted by the Great European Powers ; and such
as are employed in British India. With Directions for the Preserva-
tion, Destruction, and Re-establishment of Bridges. By Maj.-Gen.
GEORGE W. CULLUM, Lieut. -Col. Corps of Engineers, United States
Army, i vol. octavo. With numerous illustrations. Cloth. $3.50.

Military Books.

ILTTARY BRIDGES : For the Passage of Infantry, Artillery,
and Baggage-Trains ; with suggestions of many new expedients
and construciions for crossing streams and chasms ; designed to
utilize the resources ordinarily at command and reduce the amount
and cost of army transportation. Including also designs for Trestle
and Truss-Bridges for Military Railroads, adapted especially to the
wants of the Service of the United States. By HERMAN HAUPT,
Brig. -Gen. in charge of the construction and operation of the U. S.
Military Railways, Author of "General Theory of Bridge Construc-
tion, &c." Illustrated by sixty-nine lithographic engravings. Oc-
tavo, cloth. $6.50.

"This elaborate and carefully prepared, though thoroughly practical and simple work, n
peculiarly adapted to the military service of the United States. Mr. llaupt hai added very much
to the ordinary facilities for crossing streams and chasms, by the instructions afforded in thia
work." Boston, Courier.

MILITARY LAW. A Treatise on Military Law and the
Practice of Courts-Martial. By Col. S. V. BEXET, Ordnance De-
partment, U. S. A., late Assistant Professor of Ethics, Law, Ac.,
Military Academy, West Point. I vol., 8vo, sixth edition, revised
and enlarged. Law sheep. $4. 50.

"Captain Bene"t present? the army with a complete compilation of the precedents and decisions
of rare value which have accumulated since tlie creation of the office of Judge-Advocate,
thoroughly digested and judiciously arranged, with an index of the most minute accuracy.
Military Law and Courts-Martial are treated from the composition of the latter to the Finding
and Sentence, with the Revision and Execution of the same. all set forth in a clear, exhaustive
style that is a cardinal excellence in every work of lei^al reference. That portion of the work
devoted to Evidence is especially good. In fact, the whole performance entitles the author to
the thanks of the entire army, not a leading officer of which should fail to supply himself at once
with so serviceable a guide to the intricacies of legal military government. 1 '^. Y. Times.

JUDGE-ADVOCATE GENERAL'S OFFICE, }
October 13, ISW. f

* * * So far as I have been enabled to examine this volume, it seems to me carefully and
accurately prepared, and I am satisfied that you have rendered an acceptable service to thejrmy
and the country by its publication at this moment. In consequence of the gigantic proportions
so suddenly assumed by the military operations of the Government, there have been u xce^arily
called into the field, from civil life, a vast number of officers, unacquainted, from their previous
(Indies and pursuits, both with the principles of military law and with the course of judicial
ni?s under it. To all such, this treatise will prove an easily accessible etOiehor.se of
kno\vlril_'e. which it is equally the duty of the soldier in command to acquire, as il is to draw
hi- f-word a-ainst the common enemy. The military spirit of our people now being *horon^hly
ar..u<ed.add.-l to a -rowim: conviction that in future we may have to depend quite aa 'nucb upon
the bayonet as upon the ballot-box for the preservation of our institutions, cannot fail to secure
to this work an extended and earnest appreciation. In bringing the results of let^slatioD and
- ; ii! upon the questions down to so recent a period, the author has added ^really U> the
Interest and usefulness of the volume. Very respectfully,

Your obedient servant, J. HOLT.

ALLECK'S INTERNATIONAL LAW ; or, Rules Regulating the
Intercourse of States in Peace and War. By Maj.-Gen. H. W
1 1. \LLECK, Commanding the Army. I vol., Svo. Law sheep
$6.

10 I). Van Nostrand's Publications.

REPORT OF THE ENGINEER AND ARTILLERY OPERA-
TIONS OF THE ARMY OF THE POTOMAC, from its Or-
ganization to the Close of the Peninsular Campaign. By Maj. -Gen.
J. G. BARNARD, and other Engineer Officers, and Maj. -Gen. W. F.
BARRY, Chief of Artillery. Illustrated by numerous Maps, Plans,
&c. Octavo. Cloth. $4.

"The title of this work sufficiently indicates its importance and value as a contribution to th
History of the great rebellion. Gen. Barnard's report is a narrative of the engineer operations
of the Army of the Potomac from the time of its organization to the date it was withdrawn
from the James River. Tims a record is given of an important part in the great work which
the nation found before it when it was first confronted with the necessity of war, and perhaps
on no other point in the amials of the rebellion will future generations look with a deeper or
more admiring interest." uj<zlo Courier.

THE "C. S. A.," AND THE BATTLE OF BULL RUN. (A
Letter to an English friend), by Major J. G. BARNARD, Colonel
of Engineers, U. S. A., Major-General and Chief Engineer, Army
of the Potomac. With five maps. I vol., 8vo. Cloth. $2.

HE PENINSULAR CAMPAIGN AND ITS ANTECEDENTS,
as developed by the Report of Major-General GEO. B. MCCLELLAN,
and other published Documents. By J. G. BARNARD, Colonel of
Engineers and Brevet Major-General Volunteers, and Chief En-
gineer in the Army of the Potomac from its organization to the close
of the Peninsular Campaign. I vol., izmo. Paper. 30 cents.

OTES ON SEA-COAST DEFENCE : Consisting of Sea-Coast
Fortification ; the Fifteen-Inch Gun ; and Casemate Embrasure.
By Major-General J. G. BARNARD, Col. of Corps of Engineers,
U. S. A. i vol., 8vo. Cloth. Plates. $2.

ANUAL FOR ENGINEER TROOPS : Consisting of Part I.
Ponton Drill ; II. Practical Operations of a Siege ; III. School
of the Sap ; IV. Military Mining ; V. Construction of Batteries.
By General J. C. DUANE, Corps of Engineers, U. S. Army, i vol.,
I2mo. Half morocco. With plates. $2.50.

"I have carefully examined Capt. J. C. Duane's 'Manual for Engineer Troops,' and do not
Hesitate to pronounce it the very best work on the subject of which it treats.

"H. W. HALLECK, Major-General U. S. A."

"A work of this kind has been much needed in our military literature. For the Army's
Bake, I hope the book will have a wide circulation among its officers.

" G. B. McCLELLAN, Major-General U. S. A."

TREATISE ON MILITARY SURVEYING. Theoretical and
Practical, including a description of Surveying Instruments. B
G. H. MENDELL, Major of Engineers, i vol., I2mo. With nu-
merous illustrations. Cloth. $2.

"The author is a Captain of Engineers, and has for his chief authorities Salneuve, Lalobre,
and Simms. He has presented the subject in a simple form, and has liberally illustrated it with
diagrams, that it may be readily comprehended by every one who is liable to be- called i f> on to
furnish a military sketch of a poriiou of country." JV. Y. Evening Post.

Wd< try Books 1 1

ABBOT (IT. L.) Siege Artillery in the Campaign against Richmond,
with Notes on the 1 5-inch Gun, including an Algebraic Analysis
of the Trajectory of a Shot in its ricochet upon smooth Water. Il-
lustrated with detailed drawings of the U. S. and Confederate rifled
projectiles. By HKXKY L. ABBOT, Major of Engineers, and Brevet
Mnjor-General U. S. Volunteers, commanding Siege Artillery, Armies
before Richmond. Paper No. 14, Professional Papers, Corps of
Engineers. I vol., 8vo. Cloth. $3.50.

A UTHORTZED U. S. INFANTRY TACTICS. For the Instruc-
** tion, Exercise, and Manoeuvres of the Soldier, a Company, Line
of Skirmishers, Battalion, Brigade, or Corps d'Armee. By Brig.-
Gen. SILAS CASEY, U. S. A. 3 vols. , 241110. Vol. I. School of
the Soldier ; School of the Company ; Instruction for Skirmishers.
Vol. II. School of the Battalion. Vol. III. Evolutions of a Bri-
gade ; Evolutions of a Corps d'Armee. Cloth, lithographed plates.
$2.50.

MORRIS'S INFANTRY TACTICS. Comprising the School of
the Soldier, School of the Company, Instruction for Skirmishers,
School of the Battalion, Evolutions of the Brigade, and Directions
for Manoeuvring the Division and the Corps d'Armee. By Brig.-
Gen. WILLIAM H. MORRIS, U. S. Vols., and late U. S. Second In-
fantry. 2 vols., 241110. Cloth. $2.

US. TACTICS FOR COLORED TROOPS. U. S. Infantry Tac-
tics, for the Instruction, Exercise, and Manoeuvres of the Soldier,
a Company, Line of Skirmishers, and Battalion, for the use of the
COLORED TROOPS of the United States Infantry. Prepared under the
direction of the War Department, i vol., 241110. Plates. Cloth.
$1.50.

"WAR DEPARTMENT, WASHINGTON. March J), 1868.

"This system of United States Infantry Tactics, prepared under the direction of the War
Department, for the use of the colored troops of the United States Infantry, having been
approved by the President, is adopted for the instruction of such troops.

" EDWIN M. STANTON, Secretary of War."

FIELD TACTICS FOR INFANTRY. Comprising the Battalion
movements, and Brigade evolutions, useful in the Field, on the
March, and in the presence of the Enemy. The tabular form is
1 to distinguish the commands of the General, and the com-
mands of the Colonel. By Brig. -Gen. WM. H. MORRIS, U. S. Vols.,
late Second U. S. Infantry. i8mo. Illustrated. 75 cents.

IGHT INFANTRY COMPANY AND SKIRMISH DRILL.
The Company Drill of the Infantry of the Line, together with the
Skirmish Drill of the Company and Battalion, after the method of
General LE LOUTEREL. Bayonet Fencing; with a Supplement on
the Handling and Service of Light Infantry. By J. MONROE, Col.
22d Regiment, N. G., N. Y. S. ML, formerly Captain U. S. Infantry.

i vol., 32mo. 75 cents.

SCHOOL OF THE GUIDES. Designed for the use of the Militia
of the United States. Flexible cloth. 60 cents.

12 D. Van Nostrand's Publications.

STANDING ORDERS OF THE SEVENTH REGIMENT,
NATIONAL GUARD. For the Regulation and Government of
the Regiment in the Field or in Quarters. By A. DURYEA, Colonel.
New Edition. Flexible cloth. 50 cents.

HETH'S SYSTEM OF TARGET PRACTICE : For the use of
Troops when armed with the Musket, Rifle-Musket, Rifle, or Car-
bine. Prepared, principally from the French, by Captain HENRY
HETH, loth Infantry, U. S. A. i8mo. Cloth. 75 cents.

WORD-PLAY. The Militiaman's Manual and Sword-Play without
a Master. Rapier and Broad-Sword Exercises, copiously Explained
and Illustrated ; Small-Arm Light Infantry Drill of the United States
Army ; Infantry Manual of Percussion Muskets ; Company Drill of
the United States Cavalry. By Major M. W. BERRIMAN, engaged
for the last thirty years in the practical instruction of Military Slu-
dents. Fourth edition, i vol., I2mo. Red cloth. $i.

PATTEN'S INFANTRY TACTICS. Containing Nomenclature of
the Musket ; School of the Soldier ; Manual of Arms for the
Rifle Musket ; Instructions for Recruits, without regard to Arms ;
School of the Company ; Skirmishers, or Light Infantry and Rifle
Company Movements ; the Bayonet Exercise ; the Small-Sword Ex-
ercise ; Manual of the Sword or Sabre. I2mo. 92 Engravings.
Paper. 50 cents.

PATTEN'S INFANTRY TACTICS. Contains Nomenclature of the
Musket; School of the Company; Skirmishers, or Light Infantry
and Rifle Company Movements ; School of the Battalion ; Bayonet
Exercise ; Small-Sword Exercise ; Manual of the Sword or Sabre.
1 2 mo. 100 Engravings. Paper. Revised edition. 75 cents.

NEW BAYONET EXERCISE. A New Manual of the Bayonet,
for the Army and Militia of the United States. By General J.
C. KELTON, U. S. A. With Forty beautifully-engraved Plates.
Fifth edition, revised. Red cloth. $2.

This Manual was prepared for the use of the Corps of Cadets, and has been
introduced at the Military Academy with satisfactory results. It is simply the
theory of the attack and defence of the sword applied to the bayonet, on the
authority of men skilled in the use of arms.

The Manual contains practical lessons in Fencing, and prescribes the defence
against Cavalry, and the manner of conducting a contest with a swordsman.

" This work merits a favorable reception al the hands of all military men. It contains all the
Instruction necessary to enable an officer to drill his men in the use of this weapon. The
Introduction of the Sabre Bayonet in our army renders a knowledge of the exercise more im-
perative." New York Times.

RHYMED TACTICS, BY "GOV." i vol., iSmo. Paper. With
portraits. 25 cents.

HINTS TO COMPANY OFFICERS ON THEIR MILITARY
DUTIES. By Gen. C. C. ANDREWS, Third Regt. Minnesota
Vols. i vol., i8mo. Cloth. 60 cents.

"This is a hand-book of good practical advice, which officers of all ranks may study with

Military Books. 17

LIPPITT. A Treatise on the Tactical Use of the Three Arms:
Infantry, Artillery, and Cavalry. By FRANCIS J. LIPPITT, Ex-
Colonel Second Infantry, California Volunteers, &.c. , &c. 12 mo.
Cloth. $1.25.

"The formation, the manner of use, and the general handling are very practically presented,
End we are f;lad to see that, while many of the illustrative examples are taken from the
Napoleonic wars, our own war ha 1 * not been neglected. We recommend this book for use as a
limple, accur*^, and brief manual in military institutions, and for instruction in militia
organizations."- -United States Service Magazine.

LIPPITT. A Treatise on Intrenchments. By FRANCIS J. LIPPITT,
Ex-Colonel Second Infantry, California Volunteers, &c., &c.
Illustrated by 41 engravings. I2mo. Cloth. $1.50.

"It is a brief but comprehensive statement of all that needs to be known upon the subject by
tny except professional engineers. All the principles of the art of field fortification are clearly
explained, with copioas illustrations, drawn from military history, especially from the opera-
tions of our late war, the whole made plain by diagrams. 1 ' Arny and Navy Journal.

LIPPITT. The Special Operations of War : comprising the Foicing
and Defence of Defiles ; the Forcing and Defence of Rivers, and
the Passage of Rivers in Retreat ; the Attack and Defence of Open
Towns and Villages ; the Conduct of Detachments for Special Pur-
poses, and Notes on Practical Operations in Sieges. By FRANCIS J.
LIPPITT, Ex-Colonel Second California Infantry, &c., &c. With
illustrative cuts. izmo. Cloth. $1.25.

" In the illustration of the principles set forth by the writer, he makes frequent and impor-
t&nt use of the movements in the late war of the Rebellion, as well as of operations in the warsol
Napoleon, and other European campaigns. The work thus assumes, in some sense, the charac-
ter of a historical commentary on celebrated military actions, and becomes of interest to th
general reader, as well as to the student of the art of war." New York Tribune.

LIPPITT. Field Service in War : comprising Marches, Camps, and
Cantonments, Outposts, Convoys, Reconnaissances, Foraging,
and Notes on Logistics. By FRANCIS J. LIPPITT, Ex-Colonel Second
California Infantry, &c., &c. i vol., I2mo. Cloth. $1.25.

HEAD. A New System of Fortifications. By GEORGE E. HEAD,
A. M., Capt. 29th Infantry, and Bvt Major U. S. Army.
4to. Illustrated. Paper $1.00.

SERVICE MANUAL for the Instruction of newly appointed Com-
missioned Officers, and the Rank and File of the Army, ns com-
piled from Army Regulations, The Articles of War, and the Customs
of Service. By HENRY D WALLEN, Bvt. Brigadier-General U. S.
Army. I2mo. Clo. $1.50.

In my estimation, Gen. Wallen's Service Manual is a book of great ralue. It contains not only ex-
tracts from tho roguhuion*, but %?so iacl id"9, in i co.ii-ise form, tho customs of service at vroil-regu-
lated Posts, as well .i-Jiita, tte un'joritt".n ln, whkh ti!c--? so 1 m^ to k-in, an I which ii

osoon forg,>ttcn<>r overlook,) 1. 1 co:i i l>>r it i v-^y is -Cut c unoealium for J;ini>r OlHcors, and a
good book lor tho instruct! > \ of X >;i-C >m:nissi >rv 1 O.Q -ors in thoir duti ;s. 1 h.-iv p.-o3c.'iboil tint it
bo taught ill my regimout an 1 at tho Tost waere 1 command.

J. VOGF H-:,

Colonel 1st Artillo-y, r.vt.-Bii.; Geul. U. S. A.,
Fort Ilamiltuu, New fork Harbor.

18 D. Van Nbstrand's Publications.

REBELLION RECORD. ^ A Diary of American Events. 1860-
1864. Edited by FRANK MOORE. Complete in 12 Volumes.
Illustrated with 158 finely engraved steel portraits of distinguished
Generals and Prominent Men, together with numerous Maps and
Plans. The work can now be supplied complete in 12 volumes al
the following prices, viz. : Green cloth, $60.00 ; library sheep,
$72.00; half calf, antique, $78.00; half morocco, $78.00; half
Russia, $84.00.

Kris -rvork is a compendium of information, made up of special correspondence, officia. r*
ports, and gleanings from the newspapers of both sections of the United States and of Europe.
Of these latter, over five hundred are used in its preparation.

The REBELLION RECORD has now become so firmly established as the standard authority ol
the war that individuals in all departments of the Army, Navy, and Government are constantly
referring to it, for narratives of important events, and official reports unpublished elsewhere.

In addition to this, most of the speeches, narratives, &c., elsewhere published, have been re-
vised by their authors, specially for the RECORD.

The editor has aimed at completeness, accuracy, and impartiality. Completeness has been
secured by the fullest possible sources of information. Accuracy has been attained by deferring
publication of all matter long enough after events for the accounts of them to be sifted. Im-
partiality has been a special object. Every authority from the Southern side has been sought
for without regard to labor or expense, and all statements and documents have been inserted as
originally found, without editorial comment of any kind.

The REBELLION RECORD is already the main source of history of the war. Most of the histo-
ries of the war yet published have been, in a great measure, compiled from the REBELLIOH
RECORD. This is proved by the fact that documents cited in those works are quoted in thephra-
geology of the copies revised by their authors specially for the Record, and published nowhere, else

This work is of special value to statesmen, inasmuch as the course and policy of all prominent
men are fully traced in it.

It is indispensable to lawyers. A large and increasing amount of litigation is arising on sub-
jects connected with the war, and the REBELLION RECORD is the only complete repository of
evidence and authority. All important Laws and leading Decisions arising out of the war are
reported in it ; and it has already been received as authentic evidence in trial for Piracy and
Treason in the United States Courts of Philadelphia, New York, Boston, and San Francisco.

The Philadelphia Press, of October 26, 1861, thus speaks of it :

" During the trial, which terminated yesterday, for piracy, of one of the crew of the Jeff
Davis, a great deal of evidence was oft'ered by the counsel for defence taken from FRANK
MOORE'S REBELLION RECORD, and received by Judges Grier and Cadwallader, who presided.
This is a remarkable compliment to the work in question ; but not higher than it merits, from
the fulness and fairness of its various information respecting the rebellion. It is the first time
In legal and literary history that a book not yet completed has been so stamped with authen-
ticity as to be admitted as evidence in a court of law, and on a trial for a capital offence."

" We presume that there can be no question that there never was so complete a body of me-
moires pour servir published as this, and at least that it is destined to be the resort of all those
who wish to study, from a political, social, or military poiut of view, the events of the years
1860-65. That no libraries fit to be called such, whether public or private, can dispense with it
is certain. The portraits of prominent officers and politicians which have generally accompa-
nied each monthly part, have been of a high order of excellence, and add materially to the value
and attractiveness of the RECORD." The Nation.

NIVERSITY

THIS BOOK

THE PENALTY \
-roN THE FOURTH

THE UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA LIBRARY