THE LIBRARY 
 
 OF 
 
 THE UNIVERSITY 
 OF CALIFORNIA 
 
 PRESENTED BY 
 
 PRO F.CHARLES A. KOFOID AND 
 MRS. PRUDENCE W. KOFOID 
 
BRAINERD S MEMOIRS. 
 
DAVID 0RAINEED, 
 
 MISSIONARY TO THE INDIANS; 
 
 ABRIDGMENT 
 
 DIARY AND JOURNAL. 
 
 FHOM PRESIDENT IDWARD8. 
 
 BY JOHN STYLES, 
 
 Author of an Essay on the Stnge, &e. 
 
 Second American Edition, 
 
 BOSTOX: 
 
 PUBLISHED BY SAMUEL T. AKMSTIION, 
 AND CROCKER & BREWSTER, 
 No. 50, CoruhiU. 
 1821. 
 
PREFACE, 
 
 THE religious public are already acquainted 
 with a very copious Life of David Brainerd, 
 written by the late President Edwards, and 
 with an abridgment of that performance by 
 the founder of Methodism, the Rev. John 
 Wesley. It will therefore be expected that I 
 should give some account of the following 
 work, and assign the reasons which induced 
 me to undertake it. The life by Edwards 
 has been supposed to contain much unimpor 
 tant and exuberant matter, and a too frequent 
 recurrence of the same things: this arose, no 
 doubt, from the worthy author s not using suf- 
 iiciently the pruning knife, while preparing the 
 private diary of Mr. Brainerd for the press. 
 As the work is now becoming scarce, a re pub 
 lication was at first proposed. But a learned 
 and excellent friend, in whose judgment I have 
 implicit confidence, suggested, that to re- 
 
VI PREFACE, 
 
 write the life, and judiciously to select from 
 the original volume the most important and in 
 teresting portions of the diary and journal, 
 would be conferring upon the public a real 
 benefit^ as it would greatly reduce the book 
 both in size and price, without at all diminish 
 ing its intrinsic worth. This task I \vas re 
 quested to undertake, and I engaged in it the 
 more readily, as I hoped by cultivating a close 
 intimacy with the spirit of this exemplary mis 
 sionary I might greatly improve my own. At 
 this time I was not acquainted with Mr. Wes 
 ley s abridgment, which therefore I thought 
 it necessary to peruse, that I might avoid en 
 gaging in a needless labor. By this perusal I 
 was rather induced to proceed in my under 
 taking, than influenced to lay it aside: and 
 whatever imperfections may mark the present 
 volume, I can venture to declare, that it is a 
 FAITHFUL record of Brainerd s PRINCIPLES, con 
 duct, and experience as a Christian and a mis 
 sionary. 
 
 For the materials I am indebted to President 
 Edwards, and for the extracts in their abridged 
 form, after I had compared them with the 
 original, I have to express my obligations to 
 Mr. Wesley. Frequently I have indulged my- 
 
Til 
 
 self in reflection and remark; this perhaps may 
 relieve and enliven the uniformity of narrative. 
 I have taken pains to render the whole inter 
 esting and useful, and I trust that the volume 
 will prove an acceptable addition to the devo*- 
 tional library of younger Christians and stu 
 dents for the ministry. If any thing will 
 quicken diligence, animate zeal, and spiritual 
 ize the affections, the diary and journal of Mr. 
 Brainerd will not fail of success. His CM ! y 
 departure from the field of labor, is an after, tiijg 
 consideration, and may teach the ministers of 
 Christ the importance of doing immediately 
 whatsoever their hands find to do; we may 
 have but little time to live, and we have mu&fc 
 to perform. Souls are perishing; every mo 
 ment they are rushing in multitudes to that 
 world "where there is no reviving spirit, and 
 where the blood of Christ has no efficacy." 
 
 The remarks of President Edwards, at the 
 close of his narrative, form so valuable a por 
 tion of his work, that I could not persuade my 
 self to close this volume without subjoining 
 them, somewhat abridged, as an Appendix. 
 His observations on the "Witness of the Spirit," 
 should, in this age of antinojnian delusion, be 
 seriously read and deeply considered by Chris- 
 
PREFACE. 
 
 tians of all denominations: and that class in the 
 religious world, who think themselves at the 
 farthest possible remove from the immoral in 
 fluence of antinomian heresy, would do well to 
 examine how far their notions of distinct and 
 immediate testimony have the same tendency 
 with the principles of those whose spirit and 
 conduct they so justly abhor. The sentiments 
 of President Edwards, on this subject, are the 
 sentiments of all rational and consistent Calvin- 
 ists; and if ever the preachers of this denomi 
 nation in the Christian church, abandon these 
 views of the nature of Divine operations upon 
 the rnind, they will throw wide open the flood 
 gates of fanaticism and licentiousness. 
 
 j. a 
 
 West Cowes, Isle of Wight. 
 
CONTENTS. 
 
 CHAPTER fc 
 
 His birth. His early concern about religion. The 
 peculiar exercises of his mind. His desire to be 
 come a student for the ministry, -. 9 
 
 CHAPTER II. 
 
 His going to college; the state of the college at that 
 time. The revival there. Rtligioas zeal, The 
 danger of a zeal not according to knowledge. 
 Brainerd s case. The painful result. The rector 
 and superiors of Yale college. Dangerous to of 
 fend some men. An unforgiving spirit. The use 
 which a real Christian will make of persecution 
 a)d hatred, .......... 19 
 
X CONTENTS. 
 
 CHAPTER III. 
 
 His removal to Mr. Mills at Ripton. The prepara 
 tory steps to his becoming a preacher, and a mis 
 sionary, - - - - . . - 28 
 
 CHAPTER IV. 
 
 The state of his mind previous to entering upon 
 his great undertaking. Probable reasons of his 
 dejection and mental exercises. His destination as 
 a missionary. His visiting the Indians at Kaunau- 
 meek, -_.-.. 35 
 
 CHAPTER V. 
 
 The arduous nature of a missionary s word. Mr. 
 Brainerd s residence with the Indians. His method 
 of instructing them. The state of his mind. His 
 success. His ordination, 4 4 
 
 CHAPTER VI. 
 
 Mr. Brainerd s return to Delaware. Extracts from 
 his diary. His journies to different places. His 
 preaching and success, as related by himself, as far 
 as to the close of his first journey to Susquahannah 
 river; another journey to New England. Its ob 
 ject. A second journey to Susquahannah. His re 
 turn. His arrival at Crosweeksung, 74 
 
 CHAPTER VII. 
 
 Mr. Brainerd s reception at Crosweeksung. His 
 preaching. His journies. His amazing success. An 
 abridgment of his journal, and extracts from his 
 private diary. His illness, and return frem his last 
 journey to Susquahannah, ----- 
 
CONTENT*. 
 
 CHAPTER VJII. 
 
 His illness. The suspension of his labors. His jour 
 ney to New England. His death. Concluding re 
 flections, -------- 205 
 
 APPENDIX, 
 
 Containing some reflections and observations on the 
 memoirs of Mr. Brainerd, by President Edwards, 
 
THE 
 
 UDPE OF 
 
 CHAPTER I. 
 
 His birth. His early concern about religion. The 
 peculiar exercises of his mind. His desire to be 
 come a student for the ministry. 
 
 VARIOUS are the methods which wise and good 
 men have employed in defence of Christianity; the 
 infidel has been assailed by a body of evidence, 
 which nothing but determined hostility to the 
 Christian cause could enable him to resist. One 
 champion has chosen this weapon, another has pre 
 ferred that: each has been excellent of its kind, 
 and with respect to its particular object, has van 
 quished the ignorance of foolish men. But the vital 
 influence of Divine principles on the heart and life 
 of a real Christian* is with me an argument of 
 matchless power; which defends not a fact or indi 
 vidual circumstance only, but which is an adaman 
 tine shield to the entire system. It protects not 
 merely a single entrance, it renders, on every side, 
 the citadel secure. In this view, the life of David 
 Brainerd, the missionary of the Cross, has always 
 appeared to me to contain the most luminous proofs 
 of the divine reality, and incalculable worth of the 
 Gospel of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. 
 
 This distinguished man, an apostle in labors and 
 in "infirmities/ 7 was a descendant of pious and re- 
 
10 LIFE OT BRAINERD. 
 
 spectable parents: he was born at Haddam, (Con.) 
 April 20, 1718. From his earliest youth he was re 
 markably serious and thoughtful. His natural con 
 stitution was tinctured with melancholy, which, not 
 withstanding the power and influence of Christianity 
 in his heart, often embittered his life, and covered his 
 mind with a veil of doubt and gloom: against this 
 natural infirmity he had to struggle to his dying 
 day; and when this is considered, his abundant la 
 bors, indefatigable application, and ardent zeal, 
 are indeed surprising; they forcibly illustrate the 
 truth of the Divine promise "My strength is 
 made perfect in weakness." It does not appear 
 that this excellent man was, by his parents, design 
 ed for the work of the ministry. The pursuits of 
 husbandry occupied his attention, and he labored 
 with his hands for one year upon his own farm at 
 Durham. But the employment of a farmer was 
 not congenial with his disposition: his mind thirst 
 ed for intellectual improvement, and at the age of 
 twenty he commenced a life of study, attending at 
 the same time with the greatest punctuality to the 
 duties of religion, in the performance of which he 
 thought a minister, and a candidate for the ministe 
 rial office, should be remarkably strict; and it 
 were to be wished, that all who assume the sacred 
 character felt thus concerned to maintain its real 
 dignity. 
 
 Perhaps no person ever presented a more strik 
 ing instance of the subtlety and influence of a self- 
 righteous spirit, and the bondage and misery into 
 which it brings the soul, than David Brainerd: nu 
 merous and painful were his struggles with this 
 adversary; this was the canker-worm at the root 
 of all his religion; and long did he retain 1 A secret 
 latent hope of recommending himself to God by his 
 religious duties. It was no easy thing to sweep 
 away this refuge of lies; his heart clung to it till he 
 had been nearly involved in its ruins. Like a 
 drowning creature, yet disdaining to accept any offer 
 of assistance, he made every effort to reach the 
 
OF BRAINERD. ll 
 
 shore in his own strefigth; and it was not till he was 
 "wearied in the greatness of his way," till his own 
 weakness, and entire helplessness stared him in 
 the face, and pressed upon him on every side, that 
 he could say there is no hope, "Save, Lord, or I 
 perish. 
 
 The account which he has himself given of the 
 manner in which he was brought to acquiesce, with 
 all his heart, in the Gospel-method of salvation, and 
 the mental difliculties with which he struggled previ 
 ous to this, is striking and affecting. 
 
 "I was, I think, from my youth, something sober, 
 and inclined to melancholy, but do not remember 
 any conviction of sin, worthy of remark, until I 
 was seven or eight years of age, when I grew terri 
 fied at the thoughts of death and was driven to the 
 performance of duties; this religious concern was 
 short-lived. However, I sometimes attended secret 
 prayer; and thus lived at "ease in Zion, though 
 without God in the world," till I was above thir 
 teen years of age. But in the winter, 1732, I was 
 something roused by the prevailing of a mortal sick 
 ness in Haddam. I was frequent, constant, and 
 something fervent, in duties, and took delight in 
 reading, especially Mr. Janeway s "Token for Chil 
 dren;" I was sometimes much melted in duties, and 
 took great delight in the performance of them. The 
 Spirit of God at this time proceeded far with me; 
 I was remarkably dead to the world, and my 
 thoughts were almost wholly employed about my 
 soul s concerns; I may indeed say, "Almost I was 
 persuaded to be a Christian." I was also exceed 
 ingly distressed at the death of my mother, in March, 
 1732. But afterwards, my religious concern declin 
 ed, and I, by degrees, fell back into security, though 
 I still attended to secret prayer. 
 
 "About the 15th of April, 1733, I removed from 
 my father s house to East-Haddam, where 1 spent 
 four years* Here I went in a round of secret duty. 
 I was not much addicted to young company; but 
 when I did go into it, 1 never returned with so good 
 
12 lirE OF BRAIN-BED. 
 
 a conscience as I went; it always added new guilt to 
 me, arid made me afraid to come to the throne of 
 grace. 
 
 "About the latter end of April, 1737, being full 
 nineteen, 1 removed to Durham, and began to work 
 on my farm, and so continued till 1 was twenty 
 years old, though frequently longing .after a liberal 
 education. When I was about twenty, I applied my 
 self to study, and was engaged more than ever in the 
 duties of religion. 1 became very watchful over my 
 thoughts, words, and actions; and thought I must be 
 so, because I designed to devote myself to the minis 
 try. 
 
 "Some time in April, 1738, I went to Mr. Fiske s, 
 and lived with him during his life. And I remem 
 ber he advised me wholly to abandon young com 
 pany, and associate myself with grave elderly peo 
 ple: which counsel 1 followed; and my manner of 
 life was now exceeding regular. I read my Bible 
 more than twice through in less than a year. I 
 spent much time every day in secret prayer, and 
 other secret duties: 1 gave great attention to the 
 word preached, and endeavored, to my utmost, to 
 retain it. So much concerned was I about religion, 
 that I agreed with some young persons to meet pri 
 vately on Sabbath evenings for religious exercises; 
 and after our meeting was ended, I used to repeat the 
 discourses of the day to myself, and recollect that I 
 could, though sometimes it was late in the night. 
 Again on Monday mornings 1 used sometimes to 
 recollect the same sermons. And 1 had sometimes 
 considerable movings of affections in duties, and 
 much pleasure therein. 
 
 After Mr. Fiske s death, I proceeded in my learn 
 ing with my brother, and was still very constant in 
 religious duties. Thus I proceeded on a self-right 
 eous foundation, and should still, had not the mere 
 mercy of God prevented. 
 
 "Some time in the beginning of winter, 1738, it 
 pleased God, on one Sabbath-day morning, as 1 was 
 walking out for some secret duties, to give me on a 
 
LIFE OF BRA.IJHSRB. 13 
 
 sudden, such a sense of my danger, and the wrath of 
 God, that I stood amazed, and was much distressed 
 all that day, fearing the vengeance of God would 
 soon overtake me; 1 kept much alone, and sometimes 
 grudged the birds and beasts their happiness, because 
 they were not exposed to eternal misery, as I saw I was. 
 And thus I lived, from day to day, in great distress: 
 sometimes there appeared mountains before me, to ob 
 struct my hopes of mercy; but I used however to pray 
 and cry to God; and perform other duties with great 
 earnestness. 
 
 "Some time in February, 1738 9, I set apart a 
 day for secret fasting and prayer, and spent the day 
 in almost incessant cries to God for mercy, that he 
 would open my eyes to see the evil of sin, and the 
 wa^ of life by Jesus Christ. And God was pleased 
 that day to make considerable discoveries of iny 
 heart to me, and to make my endeavors a means 
 to show me my helplessness in some measure. I 
 constantly strove after whatever qualifications I 
 imagined others obtained before the reception of 
 Christ. Sometimes I felt the power of an hard heart, 
 and supposed it must be softened before Christ 
 would accept of me; and when 1 felt any meltings of 
 heart, 1 hoped now the work was almost done; and 
 hence, when my distress still remained, I was wont 
 to murmur at God s dealings with me: and thought, 
 when others felt their hearts softened, God showed 
 them meroj but my distress remained still. 
 
 "Sometimes I grew remiss and sluggish, without 
 any great convictions of sin, fora considerable time 
 together: but after such a season, convictions seized 
 me more violently. One night in particular, when 
 J was walking solitarily abroad, 1 had such a view of 
 my sin, that 1 feared the ground would cleave asun 
 der, and send my soul quick into hell. And though 
 I was forced to go to bed, lest my distress should be 
 discovered by others, which I much feared; yet i 
 scarce durst sleep at all, for I thought it would be a 
 great wonder, if I should be out of hell in the morning. 
 But though my distress was thus great, yet i dread- 
 
14 1IFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 ed the loss of convictions, and returning back to a 
 state of security, and to my former insensibility of 
 impending wrath; which made me exceedingly exact 
 in my behavior, lest I should stifle the motions of 
 God s Spirit. 
 
 "The many disappointments and distresses I met 
 \viih, put me into a most horrible frame of contesting 
 with the Almighty; with an inward vehemence, 
 finding fault with his ways of dealing with mankind. 
 I found great fault with the imputation of Adam s 
 sin to his posterity; and my wicked heart often 
 wished for some other way of salvation than by Je 
 sus Christ. 1 wished sometimes there was no God, 
 or that there were some other God that could control 
 him. These thoughts were frequently acted before 
 1 was aware; but when 1 considered this, it distress 
 ed me to think, that my heart -was so full of enmity 
 against God; and it made me tremble, lest God s 
 vengeance should suddenly fall upon me. 1 used 
 before to imagine my heart was not so bad as the 
 Scriptures represented. Sometimes I used to take 
 much pains to work it into an humble submissive dis 
 position; but, on a sudden, the thoughts of the strict 
 ness of the law, or the sovereignty of God, would 
 so irritate the corruptions of my heart, that it 
 would break over all bounds, and burst forth on all 
 sides, like floods of waters when they break down 
 their dam. 
 
 "While I W 7 as in this distressed state of mind, the 
 corruption of my heart was especially irritated with 
 these things following. 
 
 "1. The strictness of the Divine law. For I 
 found it was impossible for me (after my utmost 
 pains) to answer the demands of it. I often made 
 resolutions, and as often broke them. I imputed 
 the whole to want of being more watchful, and used 
 to call myself a fool for my negligence. But when 
 upon a stronger resolution, and greater endeavors, 
 fasting and prayer, I found all attempts fail, then I 
 Quarrelled with the law of God, as unreasonably 
 vigid. I thought, if it extended only to my outward 
 
!IFE OF BRAINERD. 15 
 
 actions, I could bear with it,- but I found it condem 
 ned me for the sins of my heart, which 1 could not 
 possibly prevent. 1 was extremely loath to give out 
 and own my own utter helplessness; but after repeat 
 ed disappointments, thought that, rather than perish, 
 I could do a little more still; especially if such and 
 such circumstances might but attend my endeavors; 
 1 hoped that i should strive more earnestly than ever: 
 and this hopeol future more favorable circumstances, 
 and of doing something hereafter, kepi me from utter 
 despair of myself, and from seeing myself fallen in 
 the hand of God, and dependant on nothing but 
 boundless grace. 
 
 ". Another thing was, tli&t faith alone was the 
 6ondilion% of salvation, and that God would not come 
 down to lower terms; that he would not promise life 
 and salvation upon my sincere prayers and endeav 
 ors. That word (Mark xvi, 16,) "He that be- 
 lieveth not shall be damned," cut off all hope there; 
 and 1 found faith was the gift of God; that I could 
 not get it of myself, and could not oblige God to 
 bestow it upon me, by any of my performances. 
 (Eph. ii, i, 8.) This, 1 was ready to say, *ls a 
 hard saying, who can bear it?" I could not bear that 
 all 1 had done should stand for mere nothing, who 
 had been very conscientious in duty, and had been 
 exceedingly religious a great while, and had, as I 
 thought, done much more than many others that had 
 obtained mercy. 1 confessed indeed the vileness of 
 my duties; but then, what made them at that time 
 seem vile, was my wandering thoughts in them; not 
 because I was all over defiled, and the principle cor 
 rupt from whence they flowed, so that I could not 
 possibly do any thing that was good. And there 
 fore 1 called what 1 did by the name of faithful en 
 deavors; and could not bear it, that God had made 
 no promises of salvation to them. 
 
 * The word condition is very alarming to the minds of some good 
 people, but all that Mr. Braincrd meant by it, and many others who 
 yse it is, that there is no salvation without faith. 
 
16 LIFE OP liUAINEUD. 
 
 "5. Another thing was, that I could not find out 
 how to come to Christ; I read the calls of Christ, 
 made to the weary and heavy -laden; but could find 
 no way that he directed them to come in. 1 thought 
 I would gladly come, if I knew how, though the 
 path of duty directed to was never so difficult. Mr. 
 Stoddard s Guide to Christ did not tell me any thing 
 I could do, that would bring me to Christ, but left 
 me, as it were, with a great gulf between me and 
 Christ, without any direction to get through. For I 
 was not yet experimentally taught, that there could 
 be no way prescribed, whereby a natural man could, 
 of his own strength, obtain that which is supernatural 
 and which the highest angel cannot give. 
 
 4< A11 this time the Spirit of God was powerfully at 
 work with me; and I was inwardly pressed to relin 
 quish all self-conjidence, all hopes of ever helping my 
 self by any means whatsoever; and the conviction of 
 my lost estate was sometimes so clear, that it was as 
 if it had been declared to me in so many words, **It 
 is done; it is for ever impossible to deliver yourself." 
 For about three or four days, my soul was thus dis 
 tressed, especially at some turns, when, for a few 
 moments, I seemed to myself lost and undone; but 
 then would shrink back immediately from the sight, 
 because I dared not venture myself into the hands of 
 God as wholly helpless. I dared not see that im 
 portant truth, that 1 was dead in trespasses and sins. 
 But when I had thrust away these views of myself at 
 any time, I was distressed to have the same discover 
 ies again; for I greatly feared being given over of 
 God to final stupidity. When I thought of putting 
 it off to a more convenient season, the conviction was 
 so powerful, with regard to the present time, that it 
 was the best time, arid probably the only time, that I 
 dared not to put it off. Yet my soul shrunk away 
 from it: I could see no safety in throwing myself in 
 to the hands of God, and that I could lay no claim* to 
 any thing better than damnation. 
 
 "But after a considerable time spent in such dis 
 tresses, one morning, while I was walking in a soli- 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 17 
 
 tary place as usual, I at once saw that all my con 
 trivances ta procure salvation for myself were utterly 
 in rain: I was brought quite to a stand, at finding 
 myself totally lost. I had thought many times, that 
 the difficulties were very great; but now I saw them 
 in a very different light, that it was for ever impos 
 sible for me to do any thing towards delivering my 
 self. I then thought of blaming myself, that I had 
 not done more while I had an opportunity (for it 
 seemed now as if the season of doing was for ever 
 over and gone;) but 1 instantly saw that let me 
 have done what I would, it would no more have 
 tended to my helping myself than what I had done; 
 that I had made all the pleas 1 ever could have made 
 to all eternity, and that all my pleas were vain. The 
 tumult that had been before in my mind was now 
 quieted; and I was something eased of that distress, 
 which I felt while struggling against a sight of my 
 self. I had the greatest certainty that my state was 
 forever miserable for all that 1 could do; and was 
 almost astonished that I had never been sensible of 
 it before, 
 
 "In the time while I remained in this state my 
 notions respecting my duties, were quite different 
 from what I had entertained in times past. Now I 
 saw there was no necessary connexion between my 
 prayers and the Divine mercy: that they laid not 
 the least obligation upon God to bestow his grace 
 upon me; and that there was no more goodness in 
 them than there would be in my paddling in the 
 water (which was the comparison I had then in my 
 mind:) and this because they were not performed 
 from any love to God. I saw that 1 had heaped up 
 my devotions before God, fasting, praying, &c. real 
 ly thinking 1 was aiming at the glory of God; where 
 as I never once truly intended it. 
 
 "I continued in this state of mind from Friday 
 morning till the Sabbath evening following, July 12, 
 1739, when I was walking again in the same solitary 
 place, and attempting to pray, but found no heart to 
 engage in that, or any other duty. Having been 
 
18 LIJFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 thus endeavoring to pray for near half an hour (and 
 by this time the sun was about half an hour high,) 
 as 1 was walking in a dark thick grove unspeakable 
 glory seemed to open to the view of my soul: 1 do 
 not mean any external brightness, nor any imagina 
 tion of a body of light, or any thing of that nature; 
 but it was a new inward apprehension, or view that 
 1 had of God, such as I never had before. I stood 
 still, and admired. I knew that 1 had never seen be 
 fore any thing comparable to it for excellency and 
 beauty; it was widely different from all the concep 
 tions that ever 1 had of God, or things divine. I had 
 no particular apprehension of any one person in the 
 Trinity, either the Father, the Son, or the Holy 
 Ghost; but it appeared to be divine glory that I then 
 beheld: and my soul rejoiced with joy unspeakable to 
 see such a glorious divine Being; and I was inward 
 ly pleased and satisfied that he should be God over all 
 for ever and ever. My soul was so captivated and 
 delighted with the excellency, loveliness, greatness, 
 and other perfections of God; that I was even swal 
 lowed up in him to that degree, that, ztjirst, I scarce 
 reflected there was such a creature as myself. 
 
 "Thus God, I trust, brought me to a hearty dis 
 position to exalt him and set him upon the throne, 
 arid ultimately to aim at his honor and glory as King 
 of the universe. 
 
 "1 continued in this state until near dark without 
 any sensible abatement, and then began to think 
 what I had seen, and was sweetly composed all the 
 evening following. I felt myself in a new world, 
 and every thing about me appeared with a different 
 aspect from what it was wont to do. 
 
 "At this time the ivay of salvation opened to me 
 with such infinite wisdom, suitableness, and excel 
 lency, that I wondered 1 should ever think of any 
 other way of salvation: was amazed that 1 had not 
 dropped my own contrivances, and complied with 
 this blessed and excellent way before. If f could 
 have been saved by my own duties, or any other way 
 that 1 had formerly contrived, my whole soul would 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 19 
 
 now have refused. I wondered that the whole world 
 did not see and comply with this way of salvation en 
 tirely hy the righteousness of Christ." 
 
 CHAPTER II. 
 
 is going to college. The state of the college at that 
 time* The revival there. Religious zeal. The 
 danger of a %eal not according to knowledge. 
 Brainerd 9 s case. The painful result. The rector 
 and superiors of Yale College. Dangerous to offend 
 some men. Jin unforgiving spirit. The use which 
 a real Christian will make of persecution and hatred. 
 
 THE most essential qualification for the ministerial 
 office is personal religion; and it is justly expected 
 from the man of God, that he should he eminently 
 holy. A graceless minister is the most shocking 
 character in the world: and a minister, whose re 
 ligion is doubtful, whose spirit and conduct demand 
 every allowance which the most liberal Christian 
 charity is disposed to make, will never be extensive 
 ly useful, or exceedingly happy. Those ministers 
 who have been "burning and shining lights" in the 
 world, have been men taught of God, who have seen 
 in their hearts, as in a glass, the dreadful depravity of 
 human nature: they have been led through the deep 
 waters, and their souls have been exercised with 
 severe spiritual trials* An attentive observer will 
 easily perceive in the preceding account, which Mr. 
 Brainerd has written, of the painful exercises of his 
 mind, and the manner in which he was led to em 
 brace the Savior, that the Lord was preparing him 
 for great usefulness; and that he was designated, by 
 the Head of the church, to preach the Gospel to the 
 poor; to heal the broken in heart; and to open the 
 prison to them that are bound. That this was to be 
 liis delightful employment he was himself convinced; 
 and in the beginning of September, 1739, when he 
 
20 XIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 was a little more than twenty-one years of age, he 
 entered himself as a graduate at Yale College, in 
 New Haven. Previous to this, as his diary just 
 quoted informs us, he had spent some time with Mr. 
 Fiske his pastor and friend; and after his death, 
 with his brother; and was thus, in some measure, 
 prepared for the studious employment of a college 
 life. But how different is the situation upon which 
 our young friend now entered, from that which he re 
 cently left. Yale i oliege, when it was honored with 
 Brainerd as a student, was certainly not very em 
 inent for the personal religion of its sons; indeed, 
 constituted as most colleges are, in which personal 
 experimental religion is not the "Sine qua non" of 
 admission, they must sometimes reckon among their 
 members the gay and the fashionable, the thoughtless 
 and the vain; and when there is not religious princi 
 ple to restrain from vice, the natural propensities of 
 the human heart w 7 ill, in spite of legal strictness and 
 discipline, sometimes be gratified; and the contagious 
 breath of iniquity sometimes inhaled. At his first 
 going to college, and during his residence there, the 
 righteous soul of Brainerd was grieved: and per 
 haps the folly he was daily witnessing around him 
 had no small share in depressing his animal spirits, 
 and feeding the melancholy which too often preyed 
 upon his mind. Surrounded as he was by these 
 temptations, however, he caught none of their influ 
 ence. In this unfavorable situation he was enabled 
 to maintain the life of religion in his own soul, and his 
 holy deportment had a tendency to suppress levity 
 and sin in his fellow students: happy the man who 
 thus lives and acts while at a university college, or a 
 dissenting academy; he prevents a thousand stings 
 of conscience, and his future ministry is not clogged, 
 nor his life embittered by the sigh of painful recol 
 lection. Let students in general compare their 
 college diary with Brainerd s and be humbled. 
 
 In January, 1739-40, the measles spread much in 
 college, and 1 having taken the distemper went 
 home to Haddam, But some days before I was 
 
LIFE OF BRAINEIU). 
 
 taken sick, my soul mourned the absence of Hie 
 Comforter: it seemed to me all comfort was gone; I 
 cried to God, yet found no relief. But a night or 
 two before I was taken ill, while I was walking 
 alone, and engaged in meditation and prayer, I en 
 joyed a jsweet refreshing visit from above, so that 
 my soul was raised far above the fear of death. O 
 how much more refreshing this one season was than 
 all the pleasures that earth can afford! After a day 
 or two, I was taken with the measles, and almost 
 despaired of life, but had no distressing fears of 
 death. However, 1 soon recovered; yet, by reason 
 of hard studies, I had little time for spiritual duties; 
 my soul often mourned for want of more time and 
 opportunity to be alone with God: in the spring and 
 summer following, I had better advantages for retire 
 ment, and enjoyed more comfort; though indeed my 
 ambition in my studies greatly wronged the vigor of 
 my spiritual life; yet, *in the multitude of my 
 thoughts within me, God s comforts delighted my 
 soul. 
 
 "One day in particular (in June, 1740,) I walked 
 in the fields alone, and found such unspeakable sweet 
 ness in God, that I thought, if 1 must continue still 
 in this evil world, I wanted always to be there to be 
 hold God s glory: my soul dearly loved all mankind, 
 and longed exceedingly that they should enjoy what 
 I enjoyed. Lt seemed to be a little resemblance of 
 heaven. 
 
 "In August following, I became so disordered, by 
 too close application to my studies, that I was ad 
 vised by my tutor to go home, arid disengage my 
 mind from study as much as I could, for I began to 
 spit blood. I took his advice, but being brought 
 very low, I looked death in the face more steadfastly; 
 the Lord was pleased to &ive me a sweet relish of 
 divine things, and my soul took delight in the bless 
 ed God. 
 
 "Saturday, October 18. In my morning devo 
 tions, my soul was exceedingly mejted for, and bit 
 terly mourned over, my exceeding sinfulness and 
 3 
 
22 LIFE 01 BRAINEHD. 
 
 vileuess. I never before felt so deep a sense of the 
 odious nature of sin. MY soul was then unusually 
 carried forth in love to God, and had a lively sense 
 of God s love tw me. And this love and hope cast 
 out fear. 
 
 "October 19. In the morning, I felt my soul 
 hungering and thirsting after righteousness. In the 
 forenoon, while I was looking on the sacramental 
 elements, and thinking that Jesus Christ would soon 
 be <Set forth crucified before me, my soul was filled 
 with light and love, so that I was almost in an ecsta 
 sy; my body was so weak I could hardly stand. I 
 felt at the same time an exceeding tenderness, and 
 most fervent love, towards all mankind; so that my 
 s ;ul, and all the powers of it, seemed^ as it were, to 
 melt into softness and sweetness. This love and 
 joy cast out fear, and my soul longed for perfect 
 grace and glory. 
 
 "Tuesday, October 21. I hsd likewise experience 
 of the goodness of God in shedding abroad his 
 Jove in my heart, and all the remaining part of the 
 week my soul was taken up with divine things. 1 
 now so longed after God, and to be freed from sin, 
 that, w hen I felt myself recovering, and thought I 
 must return to college again, which had proved so 
 hurtful to me the year past, 1 could not but be 
 grieved, and I thought 1 had much rather have died; 
 but before I went, I enjoyed several other sweet and 
 precious seasons of communion with God, wherein 
 my soul enjoyed unspeakable comfort. 
 
 "I returned to college about November 6, and 
 through the goodness of God felt the power of re 
 ligion almost daily. 
 
 "November 28. I enjoyed precious discoveries of 
 God, and was unspeakably refreshed with that pas 
 sage, Hcb. xii, 22, 23, 24, so that my soul longed to 
 wing away for the paradise of God; 1 longed to be 
 conformed to God in all things. 
 
 "Tuesday, December 9. God was pleased won 
 derfully to assist and .strengthen me, so that I 
 thought nothing should ever move me from the love 
 
1IFE OF BRAINERD. 23 
 
 of Got! in Christ Jesus my Lord. 0! one hour with 
 God infinitely exceeds all the pleasures of this lower 
 world." 
 
 Let it not be supposed, while this heavenly young 
 man was cherishing in his bosom the ardent llame of 
 divine love, that he was a negligent student of litera 
 ture and theology: no, while he was superior to all 
 in personal religion, he yielded to none in his ardor 
 after literary and valuable attainments: indeed he 
 mourns over "ambition in his studies as his most 
 easily besetting sin;" and this is never the sin of the 
 negligent, or the idle; it is the fault of an active 
 mind, which, from its natural temperature, indulges 
 to excess in a laudable pursuit; too strong an attach 
 ment, even to the sciences and literature, may prove 
 injurious to the growth of vital holiness: but the in 
 dolent and trifling are in no danger from tins quar 
 ter: yet if firainerd erred it was in this; for he com 
 plains that he grew more cold and dull in matters of 
 religion by means of this, which he calls his 4 <old 
 temptation." Thus it is evident, that, while his 
 religion was cultivated, the great business of his 
 studies was not neglected: it is a great blessing when 
 the "metron ariston," the golden mean, can be pre 
 served: but in every thing there is danger; "hold 
 thou me up, and I shall be safe," should be the 
 prayer of every Christian, and especially of every 
 minister. 
 
 About this period, the light which had shown with 
 so much brightness in the British churches, darted 
 its rays across the vast Atlantic, and gladdened with 
 its genial influence the American churches. WHITE- 
 FIELD, who was for no country, but a world, who 
 pitied the miserable of every clime, and felt divine 
 compassion for (he whole family of man; whose ca 
 pacious soul, filled with a Redeemer s love, traversed 
 in idea every region of the earth; and which actual 
 ly accomplished more than the most sanguine im 
 agination could suppose it was in the power of hu 
 manity to grasp. WIIITEFIELD, the glory of the 
 church in modern times, rushed with eagerness, im- 
 
54 11-FE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 pelled by celestial zeal, to disperse the gloom, and 
 moral darkness which covered America. The plain 
 tive call of misery "Come over and help us," thrill 
 ed through his heart: he obeyed the summons. 
 America, thou canst tell with what success. 
 
 With other places visited by this astonishing man, 
 Yale College, and !New Haven can witness the 
 amazing power and efficacy of the word of truth ut 
 tered by him. As an instrument in the divine hand, 
 he inspired new life into the students, who were 
 growing dull and lukewarm, and awakened and 
 roused others who never felt before. The labors of 
 this eminent servant of God, with those of another, 
 who had imbibed his spirit (Mr. Tennent,) carried 
 on, for it was before partially begun, what is called 
 in America to this day "the revival." A general 
 reformation, and deep seriousness, pervaded the 
 various ranks of society. Yale College now pre 
 sented a new and different scene, and there was an 
 almost universal inquiry among the heretofore care 
 less and indifferent, "What must we do to be saved?" 
 O with what delight, and with what earnestness did 
 Brainerd visit his fellow students; how sweetly and 
 solemnly did he help forward by conversation and 
 prayer the work of God. Dr. Hopkins who was at 
 college with him, has left a testimony of his zeal and 
 brotherly-kindness in the memoirs of his own life, 
 extracts from which were published in the Evangel 
 ical Magazine for May, 1806. "The persons who 
 thus distinguished themselves in zeal (that is, in 
 visiting the students for conversation and prayer) 
 were two of them my classmates, Buells and Youngs, 
 the other vvas David Brainerd." 
 
 We are now drawing near an important sera in 
 JJrainerd s history; and we are about to transcribe 
 a page upon which, in the course of his life, he fre 
 quently dropped the silent tear of sorrow and bitter 
 regret; but a page which his unfeeling persecutors 
 must have read with the blush of conscious shame. 
 It is the page which narrates his expulsion from col 
 lege, and the cause which produced it. 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 25 
 
 We must not be surprised, it on closely investigat 
 ing the best human, character, tiie delightful vision 
 be sometimes crossed with a cloud, or the finished 
 picture marred \vith a blemish. In a young man 
 let us not expect that knowledge of his own heart, 
 and of the world, which, if we have patience with 
 him, he may discover in maturcr years. That 
 Brainerd was eminently pious, and exceedingly 
 zealous, who will question? That his zeal some 
 times carried him beyond the bounds of prudence, 
 was his misfortune, and in a great measure proceed 
 ed from the circumstances in which he was placed. 
 It is exceedingly difficult, for young persons espec 
 ially, to distinguish ihe wildfire of the passions, from 
 the lambent flame of that holy zeal, which is lighted 
 at the altar of divine love; and it is not mifrequently 
 the case, that these two tilings, so different in their 
 nature, are blended in the same heart. We have 
 reason to suspect that our zeal is adulterated with 
 this corrupt mixture, if it border on uncharitable- 
 ness; if it incline us to make our frames and feelings 
 the standard of all true experimental religion. 
 There is more spiritual pride in this than we are at 
 first aware; we should ever remember, that the di 
 vine flame of zeal in this resembles the natural 
 flame, the higher it rises the more it trembles. In 
 the general revival of religion, of which we have 
 already spoken, some tares of a mistaken zeal grew 
 up with the wheat; and Brainerd was not wholly free 
 from their influence. The manner in which he dis 
 played his imprudent ardor, and its consequences, 
 are thus related by his biographer, Jonathan Ed 
 wards, whose praise is in all the churches. 
 
 "In the time of the awakening at college, several 
 students associated themselves, who were wont free 
 ly to open themselves one to another, Mr. Brainerd 
 was one of this company. And it once happened, 
 that he and two or three more of these his intimate 
 friends, were in the hall together, after Mr. Whittel- 
 sey, one of the tutors, had been to prayer there with 
 the scholars: no other person now remaining in the 
 
$6 LIFE OF BKA1NERD. 
 
 hall, but Mr. Braincrd and these his companions. 
 Mr. \Vhittelsey having been unusually pathetical in 
 his prayer, one of Mr. Brainerd s Mends asked him 
 what he thought of Mr. Whittelsey; he made an 
 swer, "He has no more grace than this chair." One 
 happening at that time to be near the hall overheard 
 those words, though he heard no name mentioned, 
 and knew not who the person was, which was thus 
 censured; he informed a certain woman, who went 
 and informed the rector, who sent for the man and 
 examined him; and he told the rector the words that 
 he heard Brainerd utter, and informed him who were 
 in the room with him at that time. Upon which the 
 rector sent for them; they were very backward to 
 inform against their friend, of that which they looked 
 upon as private conversation, yet the rector com 
 pelled them to declare what he said, and of whom 
 he said it. Brainerd thought, that what he said in 
 private, was injuriously extorted from his friends, 
 and that it was injuriously required of him to make 
 a public confession, before the whole college in the 
 hall, for what he said only in private conversation. 
 He not complying with this demand, and having gone 
 once to the separate meeting at New Haven, when 
 forbidden by the rector, and also having been ac 
 cused of saying concerning the rector, that he won 
 dered he did not expect to drop down dead for fine- 
 ing the scholars who followed Mr. Tennent to Mil- 
 ford, though there was no proof of it, (and Mr. 
 Brainerd ever professed that he did not remember 
 his saying any thing to that purpose;) he was expel 
 led the college." 
 
 The circumstances of this expulsion are peculiarly 
 disgraceful to the college, and exhibit the tutors in 
 no very favorable point of view$ a junior studen1,hav ing 
 acquired the infernal trick of tale-bearing, communi 
 cated what he had over heard in a private conversation: 
 and the tutors, as if on the alert to seize the victim, 
 instantly called together the gentlemen, the partic 
 ular friends of Hrainerd, and wrest from them by 
 hreats, the ill-fated sentence, with its application, 
 
ilFE OF BJIAINEIII). 27 
 
 and then proceed against its author, as against a 
 "thief and a robber." ! pity thti students who couid 
 be awed by the threats of such men, to disclose the 
 subject of a familiar conversation; above all 1 pity 
 the meanness of these "little governors/ which 
 involved them in the guilt of a transaction so dishon 
 orable and base. And on the above account, I would 
 only remark, that if the circumstances and exigen 
 cies of the college at that time, justified the severity 
 of the superiors, on what principles of Christian 
 charity and kindness are we to account for their sub 
 sequent and persevering hostility to a man, who sin 
 ned but once, and that in word only; and whose 
 whole life was so blameless, so holy, that the ene 
 mies of religion, as well as its friends, pronounce 
 him blessed. Some men are deadly in their hate, 
 and so marvellously wise, that they can decide on a 
 man s character from one or two words and actions; 
 and though the whole tenor of his general spirit and 
 conduct for ever gives the lie to their conclusion, 
 their decision is- like the law of the Mcdes and Per 
 sians, which attereth not: for such persons to forgive 
 an offending brother seven times, would be tor 
 ture little less than crucifixion, and as for the 
 "seventy times seven," it is one of the passages 
 they would willingly blot from the book of God. 
 My soul, come not thou into their secret, unto their 
 assembly mine honor be not thou united. Brainerd 
 had infinitely the ad vantage t)f these cruel governors; 
 from the eater he extracted honey, and from their 
 persevering opposition he learnt a lesson of prudence; 
 he was more weaned from the world, more en 
 tirely devoted to God, and his work as a missionary 
 of Jesus, And this is the improvement which every 
 good man will make of unfeeling persecution and 
 hostility. 
 
28 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 CHAPTER III. 
 
 His removal to Mr. Mills 9 s 9 at Ripton. The prepara 
 tory steps to fits becoming apreacfier and a mission 
 ary. 
 
 THE life of a student, is not the field in which the 
 philosopher or the curious will range to collect ob- 
 servatioHs on the human character, or materials for 
 pleasure. From a general barrenness of incidents 
 to seize the attention and captivate the mind, it ap 
 pears insipid and destitute of interest. From the 
 month of April, 1742, to the July following, Mr. 
 Brainerd was a recluse; his examination and license 
 to preach, and his examination by the correspond 
 ents of the society for promoting Christian knowl 
 edge, and his appointment to be their missionary, 
 were the only active scenes in which he was en 
 gaged. These were certainly events of considera 
 ble importance to him; and he would consider the 
 year in which they occurred as a very memorable 
 period of his life. On his expulsion from college 
 lie became a resident with the Rev. Mr. Mills, of 
 Ripton; and under this gentleman pursued those 
 studies which, from his persecution, had suffered a 
 temporary interruption.- His diary, at this period, 
 discloses the heart of ^ missionary; and we here 
 discover the first ardent breathings of his soul for 
 the conversion of the heathen. From it we also 
 learn, that an unsuccessful effort was made by his 
 friends to restore him to college, and to reinstate 
 him in the enjoyment of its privileges. This dis 
 appointment he must have severely felt, as he was 
 soon to have taken his degree, and would have been 
 the first of a very numerous class. The spirit in 
 which he narrates this mortifying circumstance, and 
 the state of his mind in reference to the event of his 
 expulsion, exhibit him in a very interesting point of 
 view; and we cannot but pity the man 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 29 
 
 could suffer him to be the enemy of David Brainerd. 
 The following extracts must he interesting. 
 
 "Tuesday, April 6. I cried to God to wash my 
 soul, and cleanse me from my exceeding filthiness. 
 And I cuuld think of undergoing the greatest suffer 
 ings with pleasure; and found myself willing (if God 
 should so order) to suffer banishment from my na 
 tive land, among the heathen, that I might do some 
 thing for their salvation, in distresses and deaths of 
 any kind- Then God gave me to wrestle earnestly 
 for others, for the kingdom of Christ in the world, 
 and for my dear Christian friends. I felt myself 
 weaned from the world, and from my own reputa 
 tion, willing to be despised, and to be a gazing-stock 
 for the world. It is impossible for me to express 
 what I then felt: 1 had not much joy, but a sense of 
 the majesty of God, which made me tremble: I saw 
 myself mean and vile, which made me more willing 
 that God should do what he would with me; it was all 
 infinitely reasonable. 
 
 "Thursday, April 8. 1 had hopes respecting the 
 heathen. O that God would bring in numbers of 
 them to Christ! I cannot but hope I shall see that 
 glorious day. Every thing in this world seems ex 
 ceeding vile and little to me; I look so myself. 
 
 "Monday, April 12. This morning the Lord was 
 pleased to lift up the light of his countenance upon 
 me in secret prayer, and made the season very pre 
 cious to my soul. I felt myself exceeding calm, and 
 quite resigned to God respecting my future employ 
 ment, when and where he pleased": my faith lifted 
 me above the world, and removed all those moun 
 tains, that I could not look over of late: 1 wanted 
 not tiie favor of men to lean upon; for I knew 
 Christ s favor was infinitely better, and tiiat it was no 
 matter when and where nor how Christ should send 
 me, nor what trials he should exercise rne with, if I 
 might be prepared for his work and will. I now 
 found sweetly revived in my mind the wonderful dis 
 covery of infinite wisdom in all the dispensations of 
 God towards me, which I had a little before 1 met 
 
SO LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 with my great trial at college: every thing appear 
 ed full of the wisdom of God. 
 
 "Wednesday, April 14. My soul longed for com- 
 munion with Christ, and for the mortification of in 
 dwelling corruption, especially spiritual pride. O 
 there is a sweet day coming, wherein "the weary 
 will be at rest!" My soul has enjoyed much sweet 
 ness this day in the hopes of its speedy arrival. 
 
 "Thursday, April 15. My desires centered in 
 God, and I found a sensible attraction of soul after 
 him; I long for God, and a conformity to his will, in 
 inward holiness, ten thousand times more than for 
 any tiling here below. 
 
 "Lord s day, April 18. I retired early this morn 
 ing into the woods for prayer, and was enabled to 
 plead with fervency for the advancement of Christ s 
 kingdom. At night, I saw myself infinitely indebt 
 ed to God, and had a view of my short comings: it 
 seemed to me, that 1 had done nothing for God; and 
 that I had lived to him but a few hours of my life. 
 
 "Monday, April 19. Iset apart this day for fast 
 ing and prayer to God for his grace, to prepare rne 
 for the work of the ministry, and in his own time 
 to send me into his harvest. I felt a power of in 
 tercession for the advancement of the kingdom of 
 my dear Lord: and withal, a sweet resignation, and 
 even joy, in the thoughts of suffering hardships, 
 distresses, yea, death itself, in the promotion of it. 
 In the afternoon, "God was with me of a truth." 
 O, it was blessed company indeed! God enabled 
 me so to agonize in prayer, that I was quite wet 
 with sweat, though in the shade, and the wind cool. 
 My soul was drawn out very much for the world; I 
 grasped for multitudes of souls. I had more en 
 largement for sinners than for the children of God, 
 though I felt as if I could spend my life in cries for 
 both. I never felt such an entire weaned ness from 
 this world, and so much resigned to God in every 
 thing. O that I may always live to and upon my 
 blessed God. 
 
LIFE OF BRAINEUD. 
 
 "Tuesday, April 0. This day I am twenty-four 
 years of age. O how much mercy have I received 
 the year past! How often has God Caused his 
 goodness to pass before im ! And how poorly have 
 1 answered the vows I made this time twelve-month 
 to be wholly the Lord s; to be forever devoted to his 
 service! The Lord help me to live more to his 
 glory. This has been a sweet day to me blessed 
 be God. 1 think my soul was never so drawn out 
 in intercession for others. I had a fervent wrestle 
 with the Lord for my enemies; and I hardly ever so 
 longed to live to God, and to be altogether devoted to 
 him. 
 
 "Lord s-day, April 25. This morning spent 
 about two hours in secret, and was enabled, more 
 than ordinarily, to agonize for immortal souls: 
 though it was early in the morning, and the sun 
 scarcely shined at all, yet my body was quite wet 
 with sweat. Felt myself much pressed, frequently of 
 Jate, to plead for the meekness and calmness of the 
 Lamb of God. 0, it is a sweet disposition, heartily 
 to forgive all injuries, to wish our greatest enemies 
 as well as we do our own souls! Blessed Jesus, may 
 I daily be more and more conformed To thee! At 
 night was exceedingly melted with divine love, and 
 had a sense of the blessedness of the upper world. 
 Those words hung upon me with much sweetness, 
 Psal. Ixxxiv, 7. "They go from strength to strength, 
 every one of them in Zion appeareth before God." 
 O the near access that God sometimes gives us in our 
 addresses to him! This may well be termed appear 
 ing before Goa; it is so indeed, in the true spiritual 
 sense. 1 have not had such power of intercession 
 these many months, both for God s children, and for 
 dead sinners. I longed fftr the coming of my dear 
 Lord: I longed to join the angelic hosts in praises, 
 wholly free from imperfection. () the blessed mo 
 ment hastens! All f want is to be more hoiy, more 
 like m-y dear Lord. O for sancti h* cation ! My very 
 soul pants for the complete restoration of the blessed 
 image of my Savior; that I may be fit for the bless- 
 
32 1IFE OE BRAINERB. 
 
 ed enjoyments and employments of the heavenly 
 world. 
 
 "Wednesday, 28. I withdrew to my usual place of 
 retirement, in great peace and tranquillity, and spent 
 above two hours in secret. I seemed to hang 
 wholly on my dear Lord; wholly weaned from all 
 other dependencies. I knew not what to say to my 
 God, hut only lean on his bosom as it were, and 
 breathe out my desires after perfect conformity to 
 him in all things. Thirsting desires, and insatiable 
 longings, possessed my soul after perfect holiness; 
 God was so precious to my soul that the world, with 
 all its enjoyments, was infinitely vile; 1 had no more 
 value for the favor of men than for pebbles: the 
 Lord was my all; and he overruled all: which great 
 ly delighted me. 1 think my faith and dependance 
 on God scarce ever rose so high. I saw him such a 
 fountain of goodness: that it seemed impossible I 
 should distrust him again, or be any way anxious 
 about any thing that should happen to me. In the 
 evening my heart seemed sweetly to melt, and was 
 humbled for indwelling corruption, and 1 mourned 
 like a dove. I felt that all my unhappiness arose 
 rom my being a sinner; for, with resignation, I 
 could welcome all other trials; but sin hung heavy 
 upon me: for God discovered to me the corruption of 
 my heart; so that I went to bed with a heavy heart, 
 because I was a sinner: though I did not in the 
 least doubt of God s love. O that God would purge 
 away all my dross, and take away my tin. 
 
 "April 30 Nothing grieves me so much, as that 
 I cannot live constantly to God s glory. I could 
 bear any spiritual conflicts, if I had but my heart all 
 the while burning within me, with love to God. For 
 when I feel tltis 1 cannot Be dejected, hut only rejoice 
 in my Savior, who has delivered me from the reign 
 ing power, and will shortly deliver me from the in 
 dwelling of^in. 
 
 "June 12. Spent much time in prayer this morn 
 ing, and enjoyed much sweetness, felt insatiable 
 longings after God: 1 wondered how poor souls do te 
 
ilFE OF BRAINERB. 33 
 
 live, that have no God. The world, with all its enjoy 
 ments, quite vanished. 
 
 "18. Considering my great unfitness for the 
 ministry; and total inability to do any thing for the 
 glory of God that way, 1 set apart this day for 
 prayer to God, and found him graciously near: once 
 in particular, while I was pleading for more com 
 passion fur immortal souls, my heart seemed to be 
 opened at once, and I was enabled to cry with great 
 ardency. 1 was distressed to think that I should offer 
 such dead cold services to the living God! My soul 
 seemed to breathe after holiness, and a life of con 
 stant devotedness to God. But I am almost lost 
 sometimes in the pursuit of this blessedness, and 
 ready to sink, because 1 continually fall short. O 
 that the Lord would help me to hold out, yet a little 
 while, till the happy hour of deliverance comes!" 
 
 in July he was examined by an association of 
 ministers, respecting his piety and learning, and re 
 ceived from them a license to preach the Gospel of 
 Christ. From tin s period we take our leave of him 
 as a novitiate, and he now presents himself to us in 
 the amiable and interesting character of a minister. 
 Perhaps no man ever felt a deeper sense of the im 
 portance arid awful responsibility of this office than 
 did Brainerd: he was overwhelmed with a consider 
 ation of his own meanness and entire insufficiency, 
 and many a time with a soul awed and almost op 
 pressed by the greatness of his undertaking, he as 
 cended the pulpit with trembling steps, and a palpi 
 tating heart. There was as a minister, nothing 
 confident, nothing of arrogance, or self-gratu!ation, 
 from the display which he was enabled to make of 
 his talent.?, about David Brainerd. He seemed to 
 live hut fo;- one and a widely different object, the dis 
 play of the Divine sjlory in the conversion of immortal 
 souls; fcvery inferior consideration was absorbed in 
 this, tie possessed, in a very superior degree, the 
 talent of representing truth in a lively, affecting 
 manner, and his address was solemn and impressive. 
 This with an unabating ardor in the great pursuits 
 4 
 
34 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 for which he lived, rendered his preaching every 
 where highly acceptable and useful. 
 
 His remarkable devotedness to his work, his pa 
 tient perseverance through spiritual trials and diffi 
 culties of another kind, soon attracted the attention 
 of his brethren in the ministry; and all looked forward 
 with pleasing hope to the great benefits, which, if 
 spared, the church of God would derive from his 
 eminent services. The Rev. Mr. Pemberton, of 
 New York, fixed upon him, in his own mind, as a 
 suitable person to preach the Gospel to the Indians, 
 and accordingly wrote him a pressing invitation 
 "to visit New York, and consult about the Indian 
 affairs in those parts, and to meet certain gentlemen 
 there who were entrusted with the management of 
 those affairs." 
 
 The purport of this letter was quite in unison with 
 the feelings of his soul; he who had so often prayed 
 for the Heathen, and wept over their miserable state, 
 was a man of all others, the most likely to enter witji 
 all his heart into any plan, the object of which was 
 to assist and evangelize them. This was the case; 
 and after much prayer, and the serious advice of 
 Christian friends, he acceded to Mr. Pemberton s 
 proposal; he conferred not with flesh and blood, the 
 love of Christ constrained him. On his arrival at 
 New York, he was introduced to the correspondents 
 of the Society .for promoting the knowledge of Christ 
 in the highlands of Scotland, and in the Popish and 
 Infidel parta of the world. 
 
 This benevolent society, in a day when the subject 
 of missions was generally and awfully neglected, and 
 a missionary spirit was but little felt, stood unfriend 
 ed and alone. But its object was noble, its commis 
 sion divine: the poor heathens had, in this institution, 
 an active and a zealous friend. In the promotion 
 of the grand design of its association it was indefat 
 igable; pitying the state of the American Indians, 
 who were, indeed, without hope, and without God in 
 the world: they commissioned their correspondents 
 in America to look around them for a man of God* 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 35 
 
 who, with suitable qualifications, would be willing 
 to undertake the arduous work of a missionary to 
 wild Barbarians! The providence of God directed 
 them to Brainerd; and their first interview was 
 highly satisfactory to them, and encouraging to him: 
 armed with self-denial, and animated with a noble 
 zeal to propagate the Gospel of Jesus in those regions, 
 where its light had never shone: all who conversed 
 with him were fully persuaded that it was the will of 
 God that he should go far awa^ unto the Gentiles; 
 and with readiness, yet with the deepest self-abase 
 ment, the holy Brainerd gave himself up to the 
 glorious work, 
 
 CHAPTER IV. 
 
 The state of his mind previous to entering upon his 
 great undertaking. Probable reasons of his dejec 
 tion and mental exercises, His destination as a 
 missionary. His visiting the Indians at Kaunau- 
 meek. 
 
 THE period upon which we are now entering, was 
 to Brainerd a season of deep mental affliction. Like 
 his divine Master, he must be tempted before he 
 commences his public engagements. Brainerd was 
 about to honor God in a remarkable manner, and 
 satan is determined to assail him with all the artillery 
 of hell. It is truly affecting to turn over the pages 
 of his diary at this awful interval; the irreligious mind 
 may indeed consider them as the memorials of weak 
 ness, and may stigmatize religion as the cause of all 
 the melancholy and distressing feelings which they 
 record. But the man, who has any knowledge of 
 the human character, and who understands the 
 nature of true religion, will form a very different 
 opinion. 
 
 Mr. Brainerd having resolved on becoming a 
 missionary, immediately began to prepare himself 
 
86 TJFE OF BRAIXERD. 
 
 { or the arduous task; to settle his temporal affairs; to 
 examine his own heart; to look all the diifi( ulties he 
 should have to encounter in the face; and to take an 
 affectionate leave of his numerous and highly respect 
 ed friends. 
 
 At this time, he gave a most striking proof of the 
 disinterestedness of his motives, and of his entire de- 
 vo ted ness to the cause of God. Having a small estate, 
 bequeathed him by his father, he generously determin 
 ed (imagining that money would be no assistance to 
 him in his missionary undertaking,) to educate for the 
 ministry some young person of abilities and piety. 
 Such an one he found, whom he denominates a 
 "Dear friend," and as long as he lived, he liberally 
 supported him at college. This instance of gener 
 osity discloses a lovely feature of his character; 
 but his diary, at this season, exhibits him struggling 
 with the viieness of his nature, sinking under a 
 sense of his own unworthiness, and almost ready to 
 abandon a work for which he was ready to sacrifice 
 the dearest temporal interest on earth. Luther was 
 qualified for eminent usefulness by three invaluable 
 teachers: prayer, meditation, and temptation. And 
 in the school of these instructors, Brairierd acquired 
 a profound knowledge of his own heart; of the love 
 liness, excellence, suitableness, and glory of the 
 Redeemer; and of the subtilty, power, and malice of 
 bis worst enemy. It was this which, no doubt, en 
 abled him to speak to others with so much wisdom, 
 pathos, and faithfulness, and which qualified him to 
 be an affectionate adviser in all cases of conscience 
 and mental affliction. He was thus a scribe well in 
 structed, thoroughly furnished for every good word 
 and work. A few extracts from his diary, in which 
 he relates his painful conflicts, will illustrate the 
 truth of the above remarks. Not that he was al 
 ways thus dejected; he sometimes mentions spiritual 
 enjoyment and delight, but for the most part we find 
 him in the deep waters. Jonathan Edwards informs 
 us, that for twelve days he was extremely dejected, 
 discouraged, and distressed, and evidently very much 
 
OF BRAINERD. 37 
 
 under the power of melancholy, "and there are (says 
 he,) from day to day, most bitter complaints of ex 
 ceeding vileness, ignorance, corruption, and amazing 
 load of guilt, unworthiriess to creep on God s earth, 
 everlasting uselessness, fitness for nothing, &c. and 
 sometimes expressions, even of horror, at the 
 thoughts of ever preaching again." 
 
 "Jan. 14, 1742. My spiritual conflicts were un 
 speakably dreadful, heavier than the mountains and 
 overflowing floods; I seemed inclosed in hell itself; 
 I was deprived of all sense of God, even of his being; 
 and that was my misery. This was distress, the 
 nearest akin to the damned s torments that I ever 
 endured: their torment, I am sure, will consist 
 much in a privation of God, and consequently of all 
 good. This taught me the absolute dependence of a 
 creature upon the Creator, for every crumb of hap 
 piness it enjoys. Oh! I feel that if there is no God 
 though 1 might live forever here, and enjoy not only 
 this, but ail other worlds, I should be ten thousand 
 times more miserable than a toad. My soul was in 
 such anguish 1 could not eat, but felt, as I supposed 
 a poor wretch would, that is just going to the place 
 of execution. 1 was almost swallowed up with an 
 guish, when I saw the people gathering together to 
 hear me preach. However, 1 went to the house of 
 God, and found not much relief in the first prayer; 
 but afterwards God was pleased to give me freedom 
 ami enlargement, and 1 spent the evening comfort 
 ably. 
 
 "LordVday, Jan. 23. Scarce ever felt myself so 
 unfit to exist, as now: I saw I was not worthy of a 
 place among the Indians, where I am going; I 
 thought I should be ashamed to look them in the face, 
 and much more to have any respect shown me. In 
 deed I felt myself banished from the earth, as if all 
 places were too good for such a wretch as 1; I 
 thought I should be ashamed to go among the very 
 savages of Africa; 1 appeared to myself a creature 
 fit for nothing, neither heaven nor earth. None 
 knows, but those that feel it, what the soul endures 
 #4 
 
38 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 that is sensibly shut out from the presence of God, 
 alas! it is more hitter than death." 
 
 On Thursday, after a considerable time spent in 
 prayer and Christian conversation, he rode to Mew 
 London. 
 
 "28. Here I found some carried away with a 
 false zeal and bitterness. Oh, the want of a Gospel 
 temper is greatly to be lamented. 1 spent the even 
 ing in conversing with some about some points of 
 conduct in both ministers and private Christians; 
 but did not agree with them: God had not taught 
 them with briars and thorns, to be of a kind disposi 
 tion towards mankind. 
 
 "Feb. 2. I preached my farewell sermon, at the 
 house of an aged man, who had been unable- to at 
 tend on the public worship for some time; and this 
 morning spent the time in prayer almost wherever 
 I went. Having taken leave of my friends, I set 
 out on my journey towards the Indians, though by 
 ihe way I was to spend some time at Easthampton, 
 on Long Island, by the leave of the commissioners; 
 and being accompanied by a messenger from East 
 hampton, we travelled to Lyme. On the road I felt 
 an uncommon pressure of mind; I seemed to strug 
 gle hard for some pleasure here below, and was loth 
 to give up all; 1 saw r 1 was throwing myself into 
 many hardships; I thought it would be less difficult 
 to lie down in the grave; but yet 1 chose to go, rath 
 er than stay. I came to Lyme that night. 
 
 "LordVday, Feb. 13. I was under a great de 
 gree of discouragement; knew not how it was possi 
 ble for me to preach in the afternoon; was ready to 
 give up all forgone! but God was pleased to assist me. 
 In the evening, my heart was sweetly drawn out 
 after God and devoted to him. 
 
 "March 19. 1 was distressed under a sense of my 
 ignorance, darkness, and un worthiness; got al<ne, 
 and poured out fay complaint to God in the bitterness 
 f my soul. In the afternoon, rode to Newark, and 
 had some sweetness in conversation with Mr. Burr, 
 and in praying together. * 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 39 
 
 The various causes which produced this frequent 
 recurrence of gloom) dejec,ii;n and awful dark nes^, 
 may be traced, probably, to the influence of physical 
 organization on the mind remarkahle views of the 
 abominable nature of sin, and of his own native de 
 pravity and to some remains of a legal arminian 
 spirit. The mysterious and intimate union of soul 
 and body, is sometimes in the present state mutually 
 injurious to each, if disease assail the body, if the 
 nervous system receive a shock, it subjects the soul 
 to anxiety ani|Wistress And the mind having re 
 ceived this influence, always turns to the dark side 
 of every question; and according to the importance 
 of that question it feels disquietude. And as relig 
 ion is a subject of all others the most important, as 
 it involves an immortal interest; it is often the inno- 
 eew^Poccasion of internal misery to a soul infected 
 with melancholy.* 1 have no doubt, but the most 
 
 *It is possible that the above statement of physical organisation influ 
 encing the mind to indulge gloomy and almost despairing apprehen 
 sions on the su ject of religion, may by some readers be miscon 
 strued; and from sucli misconstruction the most fatal consequences 
 may follow. But to prevent the indulgence of error, on a question of 
 such importance, I beg leave to offer the following remarks: Some 
 persons, not at all subject to melancholy, may be inclined to resolve 
 the remorss of conscience, and the fears of eternal misery which 
 sometimes rack their minds, into the influence of this morbid affec 
 tion, and thus may awfully deceive themselves. But it may be ob 
 served, that this very propensity, to ascribe their wretchedness to such 
 a cause, is an undoubted proof that their judgment on this point is 
 most erroneous. Persons really under the influence of melancholy, 
 can scarcely ever be persuaded of it; instead of anxiously seeking re 
 lief from this, or any other cheering COT sideralion, they always pore 
 upon the dark side, they are the last to discover their own malady. 
 Another thing against which we should guard is, endeavoring to per 
 suade persons, to whose religious character we are strangers, and 
 who perhaps are laboring under deep convictions of sin, and who have 
 never really fltrd to the Savior for retuge, and who have therefore no 
 onsistent views of Divine truth, that their distress is the effect of mel 
 ancholy. By conversation, a skilful minister may soon ascertain the real 
 situation of a person s mind who applies to him for advice and instruc 
 tion; and to ascribe concern about religion, a sense of depravity, and 
 horror on account of it, to lowness of spirit, to dejection, &c. would be 
 to imitate those "blind guides," who declare that every thing like se 
 riousness of mind proceeds from such a source, and who send the 
 diseased individual, who presumes to think of heaven, hell, and 
 eternity, to the ball-room and the theatre for a cure. But this doctrine 
 of melancholy as the cause of misery, when religion is the object of at- 
 t entioo, is capable of another and a very dangerous abuse. A persoa 
 
40 LIFE OF JBRAINEttB. 
 
 afflictive hours in Brainerd s life are to be ascribed 
 to morbid affection, to the body of clay gaining an 
 ascendency over the ethereal spii it. The most cheer- 
 ful Christians under the influence of certain corjw- 
 real maladies, have unstrung their harps, and sus 
 pended them on the willows, while they have wept 
 in the bitterness of distress. But religion lost none 
 of its power to make them happy, it remained the 
 same, and their rock was as sate amidst the billows 
 as the calm; yet while the body w r as diseased they 
 could not think so. % 
 
 But far would 1 be from insinuating that this was 
 the only cause of Mr. Brainerd s affliction: on the 
 contrary, 1 am persuaded that the remarkable views 
 which he had of the dreadful nature of sin, and of 
 his own deep depravity, produced those sensations 
 of horror and self-loathing, the expressions of which 
 no pious mind can read without a kindred feeling. 
 Brainerd was all over imbued with a spirit of holi 
 ness; and he judged not of sin by any other standard 
 than divine rectitude, and immaculate purity. Of 
 these he had a more perfect idea than is commonly 
 possessed, even by the most eminent Christians. 
 Now how odious, how absolutely detestable, must 
 iniquity appear in the eyes of such a man. He had an 
 angeFs comprehension of the subject, but he had not 
 an angel s purity unhappily he was a sinner; and he 
 had cultivated intensely the study of his own heart, 
 
 may conclude, that if distress of soul on account of religion, may some- 
 limes proceed from bodily constitution, joy, and delight, on the same 
 account, may also he the effect of a different corporeal temperament. 
 It is very true that there is an unfounded joy, which may be mistak 
 en for genuine piety, as well as a groundless sorrow, which may be 
 unjustly ascribed to its influence. But "joy and peace in believing" 
 may soon be distinguished from the raptures of mere human passion, 
 and the fervors of un sanctified affections: and one striking distinction 
 between the Christian and the fanatic with respect to enjoyment is, 
 the former distrusts himself, and is humble and diffident in proportion 
 to his happiness, Avhile the latter imagines himself infallibly secure, is 
 proud and obtrusive, and bears upon him all the marks of antinomian 
 impiety. I recommend to my readers, who may desire satisfaction 
 on this very momentous point, a careful perusal of Mac Laurin s 
 Essay on the Scripture Doctrine of Divine Grace, published with his 
 most admirable sermons, and which may be had of the publis) or of 
 this volume, S. T. Armstrong, CornhiH, Boston. 
 
IiTFE OF BRAINERD. 41 
 
 therefore, he felt not only abhorrence against sin, as 
 angels feel; but this abhorrence was mingled with 
 the bitterest regret, vrith the deepest conviction 
 that his soul was blackened with crime; that he was 
 a wretch unworthy to live, much less to preach the 
 glorious Gospel, an honor for which even Gabriel 
 might forego the bliss and the glories of the celestial 
 state. In such a sorrow as this there is something 
 sacred it should be viewed with reverence; and if 
 we could discover the truth of ourselves, if we could 
 know all the sin fulness of our nature, and at the 
 same time possess a divine principle to abhor it, 
 we should cease to wonder at the strong language 
 in which Brainerd expresses the intcnseness of his 
 woe. It is but the feeble utterance of a grief unut 
 terable. 
 
 But it will be asked, was there no balm for this 
 wound? Yes, there was balm in Gilead, there was 
 a Physician who was able to bind up I he broken 
 heart. But Brainerd ssoul was not so oppressed with 
 a sense of the infinite sufficiency of the remedy, as 
 of the desperate nature of the disease. Remaining 
 unbelief, and a latent spirit of self-righteousness, 
 seemed to berloud the glories of the Gospel, and 
 denied him the comfortable assurance of a faith, 
 which believes in Christ as able and willing to save 
 to the very uttermost all that come unto God by 
 him. We dishonor the Savior, when we make our 
 depravity greater than his merit and sufficiency; 
 when we are more mortified at the discovery of un 
 expected sinful ness in our nature, than rejoiced at 
 the thought, that his precious blood cleanseth from 
 all sin. These observations I have here introduced, 
 because I think they are suggested by this part of 
 our narrative, and because I imagine they are of a 
 useful tendency. 
 
 Having presented my readers with the dark side 
 of the picture, I will now furnish them with a few 
 extracts of a more lively and happy cast, and which 
 will prove that Braim-rd, though often dejected, was 
 not always comfortless. 
 
42 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 "February 15. Early in the day I felt some coin- 
 fort; afterwards I walked into a neighboring grove, 
 and felt more as a stranger on earth than ever before; 
 dead to all the enjoyments of the world, as if I had 
 been dead in a natural sense. In the evening I had 
 sweetness in secret duty; God was then my portion, 
 and my soul rose above those deep waters into which 
 I have sunk so low of late. 
 
 "17. I preached at a little village belonging to 
 Easthampton; and God was pleased to give me his 
 gracious presence and assistance; so that I spoke 
 with freedom, boldness, and power. In the evening 
 I spent some time with a dear Christian friend: felt 
 as on the^brink of eternity: my soul enjoyed sweet 
 ness in livelyj apprehensions of standing before the 
 glorious God: prayed with my dear friend, and dis 
 coursed with the utmost solemnity. And truly it was 
 a little emblem of heaven itself. I find my soul is 
 more refined and weaned from a dependance on my 
 frames and spiritual feelings. 
 
 "18. Most of the day I found access to the throne 
 of grace. Blessed be the Lord for any intervals of 
 heavenly delight and composure, while I am engag 
 ed in the field of battle. O that I might be serious, 
 solemn, and always vigilant, while in an evil world. 
 
 "March 7. This morning when I arose, I found 
 my heart go forth after God in longing desires of 
 conformity to him: and in secret prayer found my 
 self sweetly quickened and drawn out in praises to 
 God for all he had done for me, and for all my in 
 ward trials and distresses: my heart ascribed glory, 
 glory, glory to the blessed God; and bid welcome to 
 all inward distress again, if God saw meet to exer 
 cise me with it. Time appeared but an inch long, and 
 eternity at hand: and I thought I could with patience 
 and cheerfulness bear any thing for the cause of God; 
 for I saw that a moment would bring me to a world 
 of peace and blessedness; and my soul by the strength 
 of the Lord, rose far above this lower world, and all 
 the vain amusements and disappointments of it. 
 
 "Lord s-day, March 13. At noon thought it im 
 possible for me to preach by reason of bodily weak- 
 
LIFE OF BRA1NERD. 43 
 
 ness and inward deadness: in the first prayer I was 
 so weak that I could hardly stand; but in sermon 
 God strengthened me so, that I spoke near an hour 
 and a half with freedom, clearness, and tender power, 
 from Gen. v, 24. "Enoch walked with God." 1 
 \vas enabled to insist on a close walk with God, and 
 to leave this as my parting advice to God s people 
 here, that they should walk with God. May the 
 God of all grace succeed my poor labors in this 
 place." 
 
 At the time to which the whole of the preceding 
 part of this chapter refers, Mr. Brainerd was chiefly 
 engaged in travelling from place to place, visiting 
 his friends; and bidding them adieu, previous to his 
 departure, as he imagined, to the forks of Delaware; 
 for this was intended to have been the first field of 
 his labors. But from information which the corres 
 pondents of the society for promoting Christian 
 knowledge had received of the unsettled state of the 
 Indians there, and also of the hopeful prospects of 
 success that a missionary might have among the In 
 dians of Kaunaumeek, it was resolved that this last 
 should be the place of Mr. Braitierd s destination. 
 
 J&aunaumeek is in the pftwince of New York, and 
 situated in the woods between Stockbridge and Al 
 bany; and thither, on Tuesday the 22d of March, 
 in the year 1743, and nearly at the age of twenty- 
 five, he directed his steps. On Thursday, the 31st 
 of March, he arrived at Mr. Sergeant s of Stock- 
 bridge. He was dejected and very disconsolate 
 through the greater part of his journey. His mind 
 was, no doubt, deeply impressed with a sense of the 
 greatness of his undertaking, and his body fatigued 
 by journeying, which in some degree accounts for 
 his gloom and melancholy. 
 
44 LIFE 03? BRAINERD. 
 
 CHAPTER V. 
 
 The arduous nature of a missionary s work. Mr. 
 Brainerd?s residence with the Indians. His method 
 of instructing them. The state of his mind. His 
 success. His ordination. 
 
 THE following observations of Mr. Robinson, on 
 the disinterested conduct of Saurin, in devoting his 
 talents and labors to his exiled countrymen at the 
 Hague, apply with considerable force to those who 
 become voluntary exiles in barbarous climes, that 
 they may pi-each among the heat hen the unsearch 
 able riches of Christ. <To dedicate oneself to the 
 ministry in a wealthy, flourishing church, where 
 rich benefices are every da} becoming vacant, re 
 quires very little virtue, arid sometimes only a strong 
 propensity to vice: but to choose to be a minister in 
 such a poor, banished, peraectrfed church as that of 
 the French proteslants, argues a noble contempt of 
 the world, and a supreme love to God, and to the 
 souls of men. These are the best testimonials, 
 however, of a young minister, whose profession is 
 not to enrich, but to save himself and them that hear 
 him." If there be a human creature who more 
 strikingly resembles his Savior than any other upon 
 earth, it is the faithful missionary, whom dangers 
 and hardships cannot intimidate, who can welcome 
 poverty, and incessant toil of body and mind, in the 
 noble cause of benevolence and heavenly charity. 
 Let the minister who is disposed to glory in the 
 abu; dance of his labors, behold the conduct of Brai- 
 nerd and be humble; let the discontented view his 
 sufferings and complain no more; let the idle and 
 careless contemplate his intense and unwearied ap 
 plication and be ashamed. 
 
 It will be more interesting if he is suffered to tell 
 his own tale; we shall, therefore, continue the nar 
 rative with a letter which, soon after his arrival at 
 Knunaumeek, he addressed to his brother John; and 
 also with extracts from his diary. 
 
IIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 LETTER. 
 
 Kaunaumeek) Aliril 30, 1740. 
 
 ."Dear Brother, 
 
 I should tell you, C I long to see you, but that my 
 
 own experience has taught me, there is no happi 
 
 ness to be enjoyed in earthly friends, though ever so 
 
 near and dear, or any other enjoyment that is not 
 
 God himself. Therefore, if the God of all grace 
 
 would be pleased graciously to afford us each his 
 
 presence and grace, that we may perform the work, 
 
 and endure the trials he calls us to, in a tiresome 
 
 wilderness, until we arrive at our journey s end; the 
 
 distance at which we are^held from each other at 
 
 present, is a matter of no great moment. But, alas! 
 
 the presence of God is what I want. I live in tlio 
 
 most lonely, melancholy desert, about eighteen miles 
 
 from Albany; I board with a poor Scotchman; his 
 
 wife can talk scarcely any English. My diet con 
 
 sists chiefly of hasty-pudding, boiled corn, and bread 
 
 baked in the ashes. My lodging is a little heap of 
 
 straw, laid upon some boards, a little way from the 
 
 ground; for it is a log-room, without any floor, that 
 
 I lodge in. My work is exceeding hard: I travel 
 
 on foot a mile and a half, the worst of the way, al 
 
 most daily, and back again; for I live so far from 
 
 my Indians. I have not seen an English person 
 
 this month. These and many other circumstances, 
 
 as uncomfortable, attenfl me; and yet my spiritual 
 
 conflicts and distresses so far exceed all these, that I 
 
 scarcely think of them. The Lord grant that 1 may 
 
 be enabled to endure hardness, as a good soldier of 
 
 Christ! As to my success here I cannot say much: 
 
 the Indians seem generally well disposed towards 
 
 me, and mostly very attentive to my instructions; 
 
 two or three are under some convictions; but there 
 
 seems to be little of the special workings of the di 
 
 vine Spirit among them yet, which gives me many 
 
 a heart-sinking hour. Sometimes, I hope, God has 
 
 abundant blessings in store for them and me; but at 
 
 other times, I am so overwhelmed v ith distress, that 
 
46 T,IFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 I cannot see how his dealings with me arc consistent 
 with covenant love and faithfulness, and I say, 
 Surely his tender mercies are clean gone for ever/ 
 But however, I see I needed all this chastisement 
 already; l lt is good for me, that I have endured 
 these trials. Do not he discouraged hy my distress 
 at Mr. Pomroy s, when I saw you last; hut God has 
 been with me of a truth 5 since that. But let us 
 always remember, that we must, through much trib 
 ulation, enter into God s eternal kingdom. The 
 righteous are scarcely saved: it is an infinite wonder 
 that we have hopes of being saved at all. For my 
 part, I feel the most vile of any creature living, and 
 1 am sure there is not such another existing on this 
 side hell. Now all you can do for me is to pray in 
 cessantly, that God would make me humble, holy, 
 resigned, and heavenly minded, by all my trials. 
 Be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his 
 might. Let us run, wrestle, and fight, that we 
 may obtain the prize, and that complete happiness, 
 to be <holy, as God is holy. So wishing and pray 
 ing that you may advance in learning and grace, and 
 be fit for special service for God, 1 remain 
 
 "Your affectionate brother, 
 
 BRAINEIID." 
 
 <l Friday, April 1, 1743, I rode to Kaunaumeek, 
 near twenty miles from Stockbridge, where the In 
 dians live, with whom I am concerned, and there 
 lodged on a little heap of straw: was greatly exer 
 cised with inward distresses all day; and in the 
 evening my heart was sunk, and 1 seemed to have 
 no God to go to. O that God would help me! 
 
 "The place as to its situation, was sufficiently 
 lonesome and unpleasant, being incompassed with 
 mountains and woods, twenty miles distant from 
 any English inhabitants; six or seven from any 
 Dutch; and more than two from a family that came 
 some time since from the Highlands of Scotland, 
 and had then lived about two years in this wilder 
 ness* In this family I lodged about the space of 
 
1IFE OF BRAINERD. 47 
 
 three months, the master of it being the only person 
 with whom I could readily converse in those parts, 
 except my interpreter; others understanding very 
 little English. 
 
 "April 7. I appeared to myself exceeding igno 
 rant, helpless, and unworthy, and altogether une 
 qual to my work. It seemed to me I should never 
 do any service, or have any success among the In 
 dians. I was weary of life, and longed for death 
 beyond measure. When 1 thought of any godly 
 soul departed, my soul was ready to envy him his 
 privilege, thinking, *O, when will my turn come! 
 must it be years first! But I know those desires 
 rose partly for want of resignation to God. Towards 
 night, I had faith in prayer, and some assistance in 
 writing. O that God would keep rnc near him! 
 
 "8. I was exceedingly pressed under a sense of 
 my party spirit, in times past, while 1 attempted to 
 promote the cause of God: its vile nature appeared 
 in such odious colors, that my very heart was pain 
 ed: I saw how poor souls stumbled over it into ever 
 lasting destruction, and was constrained to make 
 that prayer in the bitterness of my soul, 4 O Lord, 
 deliver me from blood-guiltiness. I saw my desert 
 of hell on this account. My soul was full of an 
 guish and shame before God, that 1 had spent so 
 much time in conversation, tending only to promote 
 a party spirit. I saw 1 had not suitably prized mor 
 tification, self-denial, resignation under all adversi 
 ties, meekness, love, candor, and holiness of heart 
 and life! and this day was almost wholly spent in 
 such soul-afflicting reflections on my past conduct. 
 Of late, I have thought much of having the king 
 dom of Christ advanced in the world; but now I saw 
 I had enough to do within myself. The Lord be 
 merciful to me a sinner, and wash my soul! 
 
 "10. I preached to the Indians, both forenoon and 
 afternoon. They behaved soberly in general: two 
 or three appeared under some religious concern; 
 with whom 1 discoursed privately; and one told me, 
 
48 LlEli OF BRAINERD. 
 
 her heart had cried ever since she heard me preach 
 first. 
 
 "13. My heart was overwhelmed within me: I 
 verily thought I \vas the meanest, vilest, most help 
 less, ignorant creature living. And yet 1 knew what 
 God had done for my soul: though sometimes I was 
 assaulted with doubts, whether it was possible for 
 such a wretch as 1 to be in a state of grace. 
 
 "20. I set apart this day for fasting and prayer, 
 to bow my soul before God for grace; especially 
 that all my inward distresses might be sanctified. I 
 endeavored also to remember the goodness of God 
 to me in the year past, this day being my birth-day, 
 j am now arrived at the age of twenty-five. My soul 
 was pained to think of my barrenness and deadness, 
 that 1 have lived so little to the glory of God. I 
 spent the day in the woods alone, and there poured 
 0ut my complaint to the Lord. that he would 
 enable me to live to his glory for the future! 
 
 "After several weeks I found my distance from 
 the Indians a very great disadvantage to my work 
 amongst them, and very burdensome to myself; as I 
 was obliged to travel forward and backward almost 
 daily on foot, having no pasture, in which I could 
 keep my Jiorse for that purpose. And after all my 
 pains I could not be with the Indians in the evening 
 and morning, which were usually the best hours to 
 find them at home, and when they could best attend 
 my instructions. 
 
 "I therefore resolved to remove, and live with, or 
 near the Indians, that I might watch all opportuni 
 ties when they were generally at home, and take the 
 advantage of such seasons for their instruction. 
 
 "Accordingly I removed soon after; and, for a 
 time, lived with them in one of their wigwams; and 
 not long after built me a small house, where I spent 
 the remainder of that year entirely alone; my inter 
 preter, who was an Indian, choosing rather to live in 
 a wigwam among his own countrymen. 
 
 "But although the difficulties of this solitary way 
 of living are not the least, yet I can truly say, the 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 49 
 
 burden I felt respecting my great work among the 
 poor Indians, the fear and concern that continually 
 hung upon my spirit, lest they should be prejudiced 
 against Christianity, hy means of the insinuations 
 of some who (although they are called Christians} 
 seem to have no concern for Christ s kingdom, hut 
 had rather the Indians should remain Heathens, that 
 they may, with more ease, cheat, and enrich them 
 selves hy them; the fear and concern I felt in these 
 respects were much more pressing to me than all the 
 difficulties that attended the circumstances of my 
 living. 
 
 "As to the state or temper of mind in which I 
 found these Indians at my first coming among them, 
 it was much more encouraging than what appears 
 among those who are altogether uncultivated. Their 
 jealousies and suspicions and their prejudices against 
 Christianity, were, in a great measure, removed by 
 the long continued labors of the Rev. Mr. Sergeant, 
 among a number of the same tribe, in a place more 
 than twenty miles distant; by which means these 
 were, in some good degree, prepared to entertain 
 the truths of Christianity, instead of objecting against 
 them, and appearing entirely untractable, as is com 
 mon with them at first, and as these appeared a few 
 years ago, some of them were well disposed toward 
 religion, and seemed much pleased with my coming 
 among them." 
 
 The following extract touches the heart, and we 
 cannot but sincerely wish that he had been blest 
 with a brother and companion in labors. When the 
 compassionate Redeemer sent forth his disciples, he 
 sent them two and two; he knew their frame, and 
 would not, unnecessarily, expose them to hardships 
 when they were surrounded with so many that were 
 unavoidable. 
 
 "May 18. My circumstances are such that I have 
 no comfort, of any kind, but what I have in God. 
 1 live in the most lonesome wilderness, have but one 
 single person to converse with that can speak Eng 
 lish. Most of the talk I hear is either Highland- 
 
50 1IFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 Scotch or Indian. I had no fellow-Christian to whom 
 I might unbosom myself, and lay open my spiritual 
 sorrows; and with whom I might take sweet counsel 
 in conversation about heavenly things, and join in 
 prayer. I live poorly with respect to the comforts 
 of life; most of them consist of boiled corn and hasty- 
 pudding. I lodge on a bundle of straw, my labor is 
 hard, and 1 have little appearance of success. The 
 Indians affairs are very difficult; having no land to 
 live on but what the Dutch threaten to drive them 
 from: they have no regard to the souls of the poor 
 Indians; and they hate me because I come to preach 
 to them. But that which makes all my difficulties 
 grievous to be borne is, that God hides his face from 
 ine." 
 
 Ever active in the cause of his Divine Master, it 
 struck him, that a young Indian, his interpreter, who 
 had been instructed in the Christian religion by Mr. 
 Serjeant, of Stockbridge, and also by Mr. Williams, 
 of Long Meadow, at the charge of Mr. HolJis, of 
 London, would greatly assist him in the capacity of 
 schoolmaster: and to get him appointed to this office, 
 on the 30th of May, though in a very weak state of 
 body, and miserably dejected in mind, he set out on 
 a journey to New Jersey, to consult the commission 
 ers on the subject. This journey he performed in 
 four days, accomplished his object, and spent a week 
 in different places with his friends. On the Monday 
 following, he rode about sixty miles to New Haven, 
 nnd attempted a reconciliation with his college in vain; 
 his trivial crime seemed, in the estimation of the 
 governors, to have upon it the "primal curse of 
 heaven," and for them he might be a wanderer and 
 a, vagabond. However, this failure did not deter 
 him soon after from making another attempt, he felt 
 That he had erred, and sought forgiveness with the 
 meekness of a Christian, and we blush to record 
 again without success. On the 30th of July hemov- 
 d into the house which he had erected, and though 
 it must have been a miserable hovel, thus he expres 
 sed his satisfaction with such an abode, and an ex- 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 51 
 
 tract or two will discover to us the state of his mind, 
 and will afford us some idea of the difficulties with 
 which he had continually to struggle. 
 
 "Saturday, July 30. Just at night I moved into 
 my own house, and lodged there that nighty found it 
 much better spending the time alone in my own 
 house, than in the wigwam, where I was before. 
 
 Lord s-day, July 31. Felt more comfortably 
 than some days past. Blessed be the Lord that has 
 now given me a place of retirement. O that I might 
 find God in it, and that he would dwell with me for 
 ever. 
 
 "August 3. Spent most of the day in writing,- 
 enjoyed sonae sense of religion. Through Divine 
 goodness I jfm now uninterruptedly alone; and find 
 my retirement comfortable. 
 
 "4. Was enabled to pray much through the whole 
 day; and through Divine goodness found some in- 
 tenseness of soul in the duty, as I used to do, and 
 some ability to persevere in my supplications; had 
 some apprehensions of Divine things that were en 
 gaging, and that gave me some courage and resolu 
 tion. It is good 1 find to persevere in attempts to 
 pray, if I cannot pray with perseverance, i. e. con 
 tinue long in my addresses to the Divine Being, t 
 have generally found that the more 1 do in secret 
 prayer, the more I have delighted to do, and have 
 enjoyed more of the spirit of prayer; and frequently 
 have found the contrary, when with journeying or 
 otherwise I have been much deprived of retirement. 
 A seasonable, steady performance of secret duties, 
 in their proper hours, and a careful improvement of 
 all time, filling up every hour with some profitable 
 labor, either of heart, head, or hands, are excellent 
 means of spiritual peace and boldness before God. 
 Christ," indeed, "is our peace, and by him we have 
 boldness of access to God;" but a good conscience, 
 void of offence, is an excellent preparative for an 
 approach into the Divine presence. There is a dif 
 ference between sdf-conjidence, and a self-righteous 
 pleasing ourselves (with our own duties, attainments, 
 
52 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 and spiritual enjoyments,) which godly persons 
 sometimes are guilty of, and that holy confidence, 
 arising from the testimony of a good conscience, 
 which Hezektah had, when he says, Remember, O 
 Lord, 1 beseech thee, how I have walked before tbee 
 in truth, and with a perfect heart. Then, says the 
 holy psalmist, shall 1 not be ashamed, when 1 have 
 respect to all thy commandments. 9 Filling up our 
 time with and for God is the way to rise up and lie 
 down in peace. 
 
 "In my weak state of body, I was not a little dis 
 tressed for want of suitable food. I had no bread, 
 nor could I get any. 1 am forced to go or send ten 
 or fifteen miles for all the bread I eat; ai^il sometimes 
 it is mouldy and sour before I eat it, if I get any con 
 siderable quantity: and then again 1 have none for 
 some days together, for want of an opportunity to 
 send for it. And this was the case noW: but through 
 Divine goodness 1 had some Indian meal of which I 
 made little cakes, and fried them. And I felt con 
 tented with my circumstances, and sweetly resigned 
 to God. In prayer I enjoyed great freedom; and 
 blessed God as much for my present circumstances, 
 as if 1 had been a king; and I never feel comforta 
 bly, but when I find my soul going forth after God: 
 if 1 cannot be holy, I must be miserable for ever. 
 
 "21. I fell down before the Lord, and groaned 
 under my own vilcness, barrenness, deadness, and 
 felt as if I was guilty of soul-murder, in speaking to 
 immortal souls in such a manner as I had done. I 
 was very ill and full of pain in the evening; and my 
 soul mourned that I had spent so much time to so 
 little profit. 
 
 22. 1 had intense and passionate breathings of 
 soul after holiness, and very clear manifestations of 
 my utter inability to procure, or work it in myself: 
 it is wholly owing to the power of God. O, with 
 what tenderness the love and desire of holiness fills 
 the soul! I wanted to wing out myself to God, or 
 rather to get a conformity to him: but, alas! I can 
 not add to my stature i grace one cubit. However, 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 53 
 
 my soul can never leave striving for it; or at least 
 groaning that it cannot obtain more purity of heart. 
 
 23. i poured out my soul for all the world, 
 friends, and enemies. My soul was concerned for 
 Christ s kingdom that it might appear, in the whole 
 earth. And I abhorred the very thought of a party 
 in religion! Let the truth of God appear, wherever 
 it is; and God shall have the glory for ever. 
 
 "25. I find it impossible to enjoy peace and tran 
 quillity of mind without a careful improvement of 
 time. This is really an imitation of God and Christ 
 Jesus: *My Father worketh hitherto, and I work/ 
 says our Lord. But still, if we would be like God, 
 we must see that we till up our time for him. I daily 
 long to dwell in perfect light and love. In the mean 
 time, my soul mourns that I make so little progress 
 in grace, and preparation for the world of blessed 
 ness: I see and know that I am a very barren tree in 
 God s vineyard, and that he might justly say, "Cut 
 it down." O that God would make me more lively 
 and vigorous in grace, for his own glory! 
 
 "28. I was much perplexed with some Dutchmen. 
 AH their discourse turned upon the things of the 
 world. Oh! what a hell it would be to spend an 
 eternity with such men! Well might David say, <I 
 beheld the transgressors and was grieved. But 
 adored be God, heaven is a place into which no un 
 clean thing enters. O, 1 long for the holiness of that 
 world! Lord prepare me for it," 
 
 About this time he undertook a journey to New 
 York, and in September, rode once more to New r 
 Haven, at the time of commencement, a time as we 
 have before observed, when many of his fellow stu 
 dents were to take their degree, and when, had he 
 not been cruelly expelled, he would not only have 
 shared in their honors, but appeared at the head 
 of his class. Thus he sweetly writes on the subject. 
 
 "Whereas I have said before several persons, con 
 cerning Mr. Whittelsey, one of the tutors of Yale 
 College, that 1 did not believe he had any more 
 grace than the chair I then leaned upon; I humbly 
 
54 LIFE OF BRAINERB. 
 
 confess, that herein I have sinned against God; and act 
 ed contrary to the rules of his word, and have injured 
 Mr. WhUtelsey. I had no right to make thus free 
 with his character; and had no just reason to say as 
 1 did concerning him. My fault herein was the 
 more aggravated, in that I said this concerning one 
 that was so much my superior, and one that 1 was 
 obliged to treat with special respect and honor, hy 
 reason of the relation 1 stood in to him in the college. 
 Such a manner of behavior, I confess, did not be 
 come a Christian; it was taking too much upon me, 
 and did not savor of that humble respect, that I ought 
 to have expressed towards Mr. \Vhittelsey. 1 have 
 long since been convinced of the falseness of those ap 
 prehensions, by which J then justified such a con 
 duct. 1 have often reflected on this act with grief; I 
 hope, on account of the sin of it: and am willing to 
 lie low, and be abased before God and man for it. 
 And humbly ask the forgiveness of the governors of 
 the college, and of the whole society; but of Mr. 
 "Whittelscy in particular. And whereas 1 have been 
 accused of saying concerning the rector of Yale 
 College, that I wondered he did not expect to drop 
 down dead for fining the scholars that followed Mr. 
 Tcnnent to Milford; I seriously profess, that I do 
 not remember my saying any thing to this purpose. 
 But if I did, I utterly condemn it, and detest all such 
 kind of behavior. And I now appear to judge and 
 condemn myself for going once to the separate meet 
 ing in New Haven, though the rector had refused to 
 give me leave. For this I humbly ask the rector s 
 forgiveness. And whether the governors of the 
 college shall ever see cause to remove the academical 
 censure 1 lie under, or no, yet I am willing to appear, 
 if they think fit, openly to own, and to humble my 
 self for those things 1 have herein confessed. 
 
 4 God has made me willing to do any thing, that I 
 can do, consistent with truth, for the sake of peace, 
 and that I might not be a stumbling-block and of 
 fence to others. For this reason 1 can cheerfully 
 give up what I verily believe, after the most irnpar- 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERB. 55 
 
 tial search, is my right. God has given me that dis 
 position, that it this were the case, that a man lias 
 done me an hundred injuries, and 1 (though ever so 
 much provoked to it) have done him one, 1 am 
 heartily willing humbly to confess my fault to him, 
 and on my knees to ask forgiveness of him; though 
 at the same time he should justify himself in all the 
 injuries he has done me, and should only make use of 
 my humble confession to blacken my character the 
 more, and represent me as the only person guilty; 
 yea, though he should as it were insult me, and say, 
 k He knew all this before, and that I was making 
 work for repentance. Though what I said concern 
 ing Mr. Whittelsey was only spoken in private, to 
 friend or two; and being partly overheard, was re 
 lated to the rector, and by him extorted from my 
 friends; yet, seeing it was divulged and made public 
 1 was willing to confess my fault therein publicly." 
 
 For this purpose he went to New Haven at the 
 time we have mentioned; and President Edwards 
 thus commends his spirit and conduct on this occa 
 sion: "I was witness to the very Christian spirit 
 Mr. Brainerd showed at that time, being then at New 
 Haven, and being one that he saw fit to consult on 
 that occasion. This was the first time that ever I 
 had an opportunity of personal acquaintance with 
 him. There appeared in him a great degree of calm 
 ness and humility, without the least appearance of 
 rising of spirit for any ill treatment he had suffered, 
 or the least backwardness to abase himself before 
 them whom he thought had wronged him. What he 
 did was without any objection or appearance of re 
 luctance, even in private to his friends. 
 
 During his short residence at Kaunaumcck, it is 
 astonishing how various and how constant his ex 
 ertions were. He was "in journeyings oft," and 
 his labors were "abundant." When with the In 
 dians, he discoursed to them on the most important 
 subjects of theology, and frequently catechised them. 
 And when we consider that he had a very slight ac 
 quaintance with their language, that he was obliged 
 
56 :LI*E OF BRAINERD. 
 
 to teach them by an interpreter, that he had to man- 
 age their temporal concerns, and often to arbitrate 
 between them in their petty disagreements; and when 
 added to this, we also recollect, that the objects of 
 his more than parental care were untutored savages 
 we must be filled with amazement at the difficulties 
 which he had to encounter, and at the patient per 
 severance by which he surmounted them; during the 
 whole of the term, it should also be remembered that 
 his health was very precarious, his constitution del 
 icate, and that he often struggled with very severe in 
 disposition. For a considerable part of the time, we 
 are informed, that amidst his other labors, he applied 
 himself closely to the study of the Indian language; 
 and that he might enjoy the advantage of a tutor, he 
 often rode, in the depth of winter, a distance of twen 
 ty miles backwards and forwards through the unin 
 habited woods between Stockbridge and Kaunau- 
 meek. 
 
 His inward conflicts, trials, and enjoyments, dur 
 ing his residence at Kaunaumeek, will appear from 
 the following extracts from his diary. 
 
 "October 4. This day 1 rode home to my own 
 house and people. The poor Indians appeared very 
 glad of my return. I presently fell on my knees, 
 and blessed God for my safe return. I have taken 
 many considerable journies since this time last year, 
 and yet God has never suffered one of my bones to be 
 broken, or any distressing calamity to befal me, 
 though 1 have been often exposed to cold and hungei 
 in the wilderness, where the comforts of life were 
 not to be had; have frequently been lost in the 
 woods; and sometimes obliged to ride much of the 
 night; and once lay out in the woods all night. 
 
 "16. I retired and poured out my soul to God witl 
 much freedom; and yet in anguish, to find myself sc 
 unspeakably sinful and unworthy before a holy God 
 I was now much resigned under God s dispensation* 
 towards me, though my trials had been very great 
 But thought whether 1 could be resigned, if Goe 
 should let the French Indians come upon me, and de 
 
LIFE OF BRAINER*, 57 
 
 prive me of my life, or carry me away captive 
 (though I knew of no special reason then to propose 
 this trial to myself,) and my soul seemed so far to 
 rest in God, that the sting and terror of these things 
 was gone. Presently after I received the following 
 letter by a messenger sent on purpose. 
 
 "Sir, Just now we received advices from Col. 
 Stoddard, that there is the utmost danger of a rup 
 ture with France. He lias received the same from 
 our governor, ordering him to give notice to all the 
 exposed places, thai tliev may secure themselves the 
 best they can against any sudden invasion. We 
 thought besi to send directly to Kaunaumeek, that 
 you may take the pi udentest measures for your safe 
 ty. J am, Sir, &c. 
 
 "I thought it came in a good season: for my heart 
 seemed h xed on God, therefore I was not surprised; 
 but this news only made me more serious, and taught 
 me that 1 must not please myself with any of the 
 comforts of life which 1 had been preparing. 
 
 "23. 1 had some freedom and warmth, both parts 
 of the day. And my people were very attentive. In 
 the evening, two or three came to me under concern 
 for their souls; to whom I was enabled to discourse 
 closely, and with some earnestness and desire. 
 
 "SI. My soul was so lifted up to God, that I 
 could pour out my desires to him, for more grace and 
 further degrees of sanctification, with abundant free 
 dom. I longed to be more abundantly prepared for 
 that blessedness, with which I was then in some 
 measure refreshed. 
 
 "Nov. 3. 1 spent this (lay in secret fasting and 
 prayer, from morning till night. Early in the morning, 
 I had some assistance in prayer. Afterwards 1 road 
 the story of Elijah the prophet. My soul was much 
 moved, observing the faith, zeal, and power of that 
 Loly man; and how he wrestled with God in prayer. 
 I then cried with Elisha, "Where is the Lord God of 
 Elijah! I longed for more faith! My soul breathed 
 after God, and pleaded with him, that a double por 
 tion of that spirit, which waa given to Elijah, might 
 
8 LUTE OF URAINERD. 
 
 rest on me, and I saw God is the same that he was 
 in the days of Elijah. I was enabled to wrestle with 
 God by prayer, in a more affectionate, humble, and 
 importunate manner, than 1 have for many months 
 past. Nothing seemed too hard for God to perform; 
 nothing too great for me to hope for from him. I 
 had for many months lost all hopes of doing any 
 special service for God in the world; it appeared im 
 possible, that one so vile should be thus employed 
 for God. But at this time God was pleased to re 
 vive this hope. Afterwards I read the third chapter 
 of Exodus, and on to the twentieth, and saw more of 
 the glory and majesty of God discovered in those 
 chapters, than ever I had seen before; frequently, in 
 the mean time, falling on my knees, and crying to 
 God for the faith of Moses, and for a manifestation 
 of the Divine glory. My soul was ardent in prayer, 
 and 1 was enabled to wrestle for myself, for my 
 friends, and for the church. . I felt more desire to 
 see the power of God in the conversion of souls, than 
 I have done for a long season. Blessed be God for 
 this season of fasting and prayer. May his goodness 
 always abide with me, and draw my soul to him. 
 
 "7. This morning my mind was solemn, fixed, 
 affectionate, and ardent in desires after holiness; and 
 felt full of tenderness and love. My affections seem 
 ed to be dissolved into kindness and softness. My 
 soul longed after God, and cried to him with filial 
 freedom, reverence, and boldness. O that 1 might 
 be entirely consecrated and devoted to God! 
 
 "Dec. 3. I rode home to my house and people. 
 Suffered much with extreme cold. I trust, I shall 
 ere long arrive, where my toils shall cease. 
 
 "5. J rode to Stockbridge, but was almost out 
 done, with the extreme cold. I had some refreshing 
 meditations by the way; but was barren and lifeless 
 much of the day. Thus my days roll away, with 
 but little done for God: and this is my burden. 
 
 *<6. I was perplexed to see the vanity and levity 
 if professed Christians: but I spent the evening 
 
LIFE OF BRA.INERD. 59 
 
 with a Christian friend, that was able to sympathize 
 with me in my spiritual conflicts. 
 
 U 8. My mind was lost with different affections. I 
 was looking round in the world, to see if there was 
 not some happiness to be derived from it. God, and 
 some objects in the world, seemed eacli to invite my 
 heart; and my soul was distracted between them, i 
 have not been so beset for a long time, with relation 
 to some objects, which I thought myself most dead 
 to. But while 1 was desiring to please myself with 
 any thing below, sorrow, and perplexity, attended 
 the first motions of desire. I found no peace, or de 
 liverance from this distraction till I found access to 
 the throne of grace; and as soon as I had any sense 
 of God, the allurements of the world vanished. But 
 my soul mourned over my folly, that I should desire 
 any pleasure, but in God. God forgive my spiritual 
 idolatry! 
 
 "26. I rode to Stockbridge, but was very much 
 fatigued with my journey, wherein 1 underwent 
 great hardship: being much exposed and very wet 
 by falling into a river. 1 spent the day and evening 
 without much sense of Divine things; but perplexed 
 with wandering thoughts. 
 
 "9. I spent the day mainly in conversing with 
 friends; yet enjoyed little satisfaction, because i could 
 find but few disposed to converse of heavenly things, 
 Alas, what are the things of this world, to afford 
 satisfaction to the soul! I blessed God for retire- 
 ment, and that 1 am not always exposed to company. 
 O that I could live in the secret of God s presence! 
 
 "Lord s-day, Jan. 1, 1743. Of a truth God has 
 been gracious to me the last year, though he has 
 caused me to pass through many sorrows; he has 
 provided for me bountifully, so that I have been en 
 abled, in about fifteen months past, to bestow to char 
 itable uses about an hundred pounds. Blessed be the 
 Lord, that he has so far used me as his steward) to 
 distribute a portion of his goods. May I al \Vays re 
 member, that all I have comes from God. BJessed 
 be the Lord that has carried me through all the toil*, 
 
Q LIFE OF BEAINERD. 
 
 fatigues, and hardships of the year past. that I 
 could begin this year with God, and spend the whole 
 of it to his glory, either in life or death! 
 
 "3. My time passes away so swiftly, that I am as 
 tonished when 1 reflect how little 1 do in it. My 
 state of solitude does not make the hours hang heavy 
 upon my hands. O what reason of thankfulness 
 have 1 on account of this retirement! 1 do not lead 
 a Christian life when I am abroad, and cannot spend 
 time in devotion, Christian conversation, and medi 
 tation. Those weeks that I am obliged to be from 
 home, in order to learn the Indian tongue, are mostly 
 spent in barrenness; and I feel myself a stranger to 
 the throne of grace. When I return home, and give 
 myself to meditation, prayer, and fasting, a new 
 scene opens, and my soul longs for mortification, 
 .self-denial, humility, and divorcement from all the 
 things of the world. 
 
 "4. Time appeared a moment, life a vapor, and all 
 its enjoyments as empty bubbles, and fleeting blasts of 
 wind. 
 
 "6. Feeling my extreme weakness, and want of 
 grace, 1 set apart this day for fasting and prayer. 
 My soul intensely longed, that the dreadful spots 
 and stains of my siiv may be washed away. My 
 mind was greatly fixed on Divine things; my reso 
 lution for a life of mortification, continual watchful 
 ness, self-denial, seriousness, and devotion to God, 
 were strong and fixed; my desires ardent and in- 1 
 tense: my conscience tender, and afraid of every ap 
 pearance of evil. My soul was grieved with the 
 reflection on rny past levity, and want of resolution 
 for God. I solemnly renewed my dedication of my 
 self to God, and longed for grace to enable me al 
 ways to keep covenant with him. 
 
 "Feb. 2. 1 spent this day in fasting and prayer, 
 seeking the presence and assistance of God, that he 
 would enable me to overcome all my corruptions and 
 spiritual enemies. 
 
 "7. I was much engaged in meditation on the pow 
 ers and affections of the godly soul in the pursuit of 
 
LIFE OF BRAINEilD. 6.1 
 
 their beloved object: wrote something of the native 
 language of spiritual sensation in its soft and tender 
 whispers; declaring that it now feels and tastes that 
 the Lord is gracious: that he is the supreme good, the 
 only satisfying happiness; that he is a complete, suffi 
 cient, and Almighty portion: saying, 
 
 " Whom have 1 in heaven hut thee, and there is 
 none upon earth that I desire besides thee. O, I fed 
 it is heaven to please him, and to he just what he 
 would have me to he! O that my soul were holy as 
 he is holy! O that it were pure, even as Christ is 
 pure: and perfect as my Father in heaven is perfect! 
 These, 1 feel, are the sweetest commands iti God s 
 hook, comprising all others. And shall 1 break 
 them! must 1 break them! am I under a necessity of 
 it as long as I live in the world! No. O my soul, 
 woe is me that 1 am a sinner, because I grieve and 
 offend this blessed God, who is infinite in goodness 
 and grace! Oh, inethinks if he would punish me for 
 my sins, it would not wound my heart so deep as 
 to offend him; but though 1 sin continually, yet he 
 continually repeats his kindness to me! I could bear 
 any suffering, but how can I bear to grieve and dis 
 honor this blessed God! How shall I yield ten thou 
 sand times more honor to him? What shall I do to 
 glorify this best of beings? O that I could conse 
 crate myself, soul and body, to his service for ever! 
 that I could give up myself to him, so as never 
 more to attempt to be my own, or to have any will 
 or affections that are not perfectly conformed to him! 
 O ye angels, do ye glorify him incessantly: and if 
 possible, prostrate yourselves lower before the bles 
 sed King of heaven!,* I long to bear a part with you; 
 and if it were possible, to help you. Oh, when we 
 have done all that we can, to ail eternity, we sbaU 
 not be able to offer the ten thousandth part of the 
 homage that the glorious God deserves! 
 
 "10. I was exceedingly oppressed with shame, 
 grief, and fear, under a ser.se of my past folly. 
 When God sets before me my misconduct, especially 
 any instances of misguided zeal, it sinks my soul into 
 
62 1IEE OF BRA1NERD. 
 
 shame and confusion. 1 have no confidence to hold 
 up my face, even before my fellow-worms; but only 
 when my soul confides in God, and I find the sweet 
 temper of Christ, the spirit of humility, solemnity, 
 and mortification, alive in my soul. 
 
 "Friday, March 2. I never felt so much love to 
 my enemies (though at that time I found such a dis 
 position, that I scarce knew how to think that any 
 such thing as enmity lodged in my soul; it seemed as 
 if all the world must needs be friends,) and never 
 prayed with more freedom and delight for myself, or 
 dearest friend, than I did now for them! 
 
 "Saturday, March 3. I spent an hour in prayer, 
 \vith great intenseness and freedom, and with the 
 most soft and tender affection towards mankind, I 
 longed that those, who I have reason to think owe 
 me ill-will, might be eternally happy: it seemed re 
 freshing to think of meeting them in heaven, how 
 much soever they had injured me on earth; I had no 
 disposition to insist upon any confession from them, 
 in order to reconciliation, and the exercise of love 
 and kindness to them. O it is an emblem of heaven 
 to love all the world with a love of kindness, foV- 
 giveness, and benevolence; to feel our souls sedate, 
 mild, and meek; to be void of all evil surmisings 
 and suspicions, and scarce able to think evit of any 
 man upon any occasion; to find our hearts simple, 
 open, and free, to those who look upon us with a 
 different eye. 
 
 "10. I felt exceeding dead to the world, and all 
 its enjoyments: I was ready to give up life, and all 
 its comforts, as soon as called to it; and yet Ihen 
 had as much comfort of life as almost ever 1 had* 
 Life itself appeared but an empty bubble; the riches, 
 honors, and enjoyments of it extremely tasteless. I 
 longed to be entirely crucified to all tilings here be 
 low. My soul was sweetly resigned to God s dis 
 posal of me; and I saw there had nothing happened 
 to me but what was best for me. 1 confided in God, 
 that he would never leave me, though I should walk 
 through the valley of the shadow of death. It was 
 
LIFE OF BRAI5ERB. 63 
 
 my meat and drink to be holy, to live to the Lord, 
 and die to the Lord. And 1 then enjoyed such an 
 heaven, as far exceeded the most sublime conceptions 
 of an unregenerate soul; and even unspeakably be 
 yond what 1 myself could conceive at another time. 
 1 did not wonder that Peter said, <Lord, it is good 
 to be here, 7 when thus refreshed with Divine glories. 
 My soul was full of love and tenderness in the duty 
 of intercession; especially of sweet affection to some 
 godly ministers. 1 prayed earnestly for those I have 
 reason to fear are my enemies; and could not have 
 spoken a word of bitterness, or entertained a bitter 
 thought against the vilest man living 1 had a sense 
 of my own great un worthiness. My soul seemed to 
 breathe forth love and praise to God afresh, when I 
 thought he would let his children love and receive me 
 as one of their brethren and fellow-citizens: and 
 when I thought of their treating me in that manner, 
 1 longed to lie at their feet; and could think of no 
 way to express the sincerity and simplicity of my 
 love and esteem of them, as being much better than 
 myself. J lunged to get on my knees, and ask for 
 giveness of every body that ever had seen any thing 
 amiss in my past conduct, especially in my religious 
 zeal. 
 
 "Lord s day, March 11. I preached from the par 
 able of the sower, had some freedom, affection, and 
 fervency, in addressing my poor people: longing that 
 God should take hold of their hearts, and make them 
 spiritually alive. And indeed I had so much to say 
 to them, that I knew not how to leave oft speaking." 
 
 The particular method which Mr. Brainerd pur 
 sued in conveying instruction to the Indians, will ap 
 pear from part of a letter which he addressed to Mr. 
 Pemberton: "In my labors with them, <to turn them 
 from darkness to light, 1 studied what was most 
 plain and easy, and best suited to their capacities; 
 and endeavored to set before them, from time to time 
 (as they were able to receive them,) the most impor 
 tant and necessary truths of Christianity: such as 
 most immediately concerned their speedy conversion 
 
64 J.IPE OF BRAINERl*. 
 
 to God, and such as I judged had the greatest ten 
 dency (as means) to effect that glorious change, in 
 them. But especially I made it the scope and drift 
 of all my lahors, to lead them into a thorough ac 
 quaintance with these two things: first, the sinfullifss 
 awl misery of the. estate they were naturally in; the 
 evil of their hearts, the pollution of their natures, 
 the heavy guilt they were under, and their exposed 
 ness to everlasting punishment; as also, their utter 
 inahility to save themselves, either from their sins, 
 or from those miseries which are the just punish 
 ment of them, and their unworthiness of any mercy 
 at the hand of God, on account of any thing they 
 themselves could do, to procure his favor, and, con 
 sequently, their extreme need of Christ to save them: 
 and, secondly, I frequently endeavored to open to 
 them thzf ulness, all-sufficiency , and freeness of that 
 redemption which the Son of God hath wrought 
 out, hy his ohedience and sufferings for perishing 
 sinners. How this provision he had made was suited 
 to all their wants; and how he called and invited 
 them to accept of everlasting life freely, notwith 
 standing all their sinfulness, inahility, unworthiness, 
 &c. After I had been with the Indians several 
 months, I composed sundry forms of prayer, adapt 
 ed to their circumstances and capacities, which with 
 the help of my interpreter, I translated into the In 
 dian language, and soon learned to pronounce their 
 words, so as to pray with them in their own tongue. 
 1 also translated sundry psalms into their language; 
 and soon after, we were able to sing in the worship 
 of God. 
 
 "When my people had gained some acquaintance 
 with many of the truths of Christianity, so that they 
 were capable of receiving and understanding many 
 others which, at first, could not be taught them, by 
 reason of their ignorance of those that were necessa 
 ry to be previously known, and upon which others 
 depended: I then gave them an historical account of 
 God s dealings with his ancient professing people 
 the Jews: some of the rights and ceremonies they 
 
I.IFE OF BRAIXEKD. 65 
 
 were obliged to observe; as their sacrifices, &c. and 
 what these were designed to represent to them: as 
 also some of the surprising miracles God wrought 
 for their salvation, while they trusted on him, and 
 the sore punishments he sometimes brought upon 
 them when they forsook and sinned against him. Af 
 terwards I proceeded to give them a relation of the 
 birth, life, miracles, sufferings, death, and resurrec 
 tion of Christ; as well as his ascension, and the 
 wonderful effusion of the Holy Spirit consequent 
 thereupon. 
 
 "And having thus endeavored to prepare the way 
 by such a general account of things, 1 next proceed 
 ed to read and expound to them the Gospel of Mat 
 thew (at least the substance of it) in course; wherein 
 they had a more distinct and particular view of what 
 they had before some general notion of. These 
 expositions I attended almost every evening, when 
 there was any considerable number of them at home; 
 except when I was obliged to be absent myself, in 
 order to learn the Indian language with the Rev. 
 Mr. Serjeant. Besides these means of instruction, 
 there was likewise an English school constantly 
 kept by my interpreter, among the Indians, which I 
 used frequently to visit, in order to give the children 
 and young prople some proper instructions, and seri 
 ous exhortations, suited to their age. The degree 
 of knowledge, to which some of them attained, was 
 considerable. Many of the truths of Christianity 
 seemed fixed in their minds (especially in some in 
 stances;) so that they could speak to me of them 
 selves, and ask such questions about them as were 
 necessary to render them more plain and clear to 
 their understandings. 
 
 "The children, also, and young people, who at 
 tended the school made considerable proficiency (at 
 least some of them) in their learning; so that, had 
 they understood the English language well, they 
 would have been able to read somewhat readily in a 
 psalter. But that which was most of all desirable, 
 and gave me the greatest encouragement, amidst 
 
66 LIFE Or BRAINERD. 
 
 many difficult and disconsolate hours, was, that the 
 truths of God ? s word seemed, at times, to be attended 
 with some power upon the hearts and consciences 
 of the Indians. And especially this appeared evi 
 dent in a few instances, who were awakened to some 
 sense of their miserable estate by nature, and ap 
 peared solicitous for deliverance from it. Several 
 of them came of their own accord to discourse with 
 me about their soul s concern; and some, with tears, 
 inquired, <What they should do to be saved! and 
 Whether the God that Christians served would be 
 merciful to those who had been frequently drunk? &c. 
 And although 1 cannot say I have satisfactory evi 
 dences of their being renewed in the spirit of their 
 minds, and savingly converted to God; yet the Spir 
 it of God did (L apprehend,) in such a manner, at 
 tend the means of grace, and so operate upon their 
 minds thereby, as might justly afford matter of en 
 couragement to hope that God designed good to 
 them, and that he was preparing his way into "their 
 souls. There likewise appeared a reformation in (he 
 lives and manners of the Indians. 
 
 "Their idolatrous sacrifices (of which there was but 
 one or two that I know of, after my coming among 
 them) were wholly laid aside; and their heathenish 
 custom of dancing, hallooing, &c. thus seemed, in a 
 considerable measure, broken off from. And 1 could 
 not but hoptf, that they were reformed, in some mea 
 sure, from the sin of drunkenness. They likewise 
 manifested a regard to the Lord s-day; and not only 
 behaved soberly themselves, but took care also to 
 keep their children in order. Yet, after all, I must 
 confess, that, as there were many hopeful appear 
 ances among them, so there were somethings more 
 discouraging; and while I rejoiced to observe any 
 seriousness and concern among them about the affairs 
 of their souls, still I was not without continual fear 
 and concern, lest such encouraging appearances 
 might prove, like the morning cloud that passeth 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. C7 
 
 Mr. Brainerd continued at Kaiinaumeck about a 
 year. And as the Indians there were few in number, 
 he persuaded them ft remove to Stockbridge, that 
 they might, enjoy the benefit of Mr. Serjeant s minis 
 trations: for himself he thought <*he might do more 
 service for Christ in a field where he should enjoy 
 full scope for his exertions." His account of his 
 first intimating his intention to his sable flock is 
 affecting. "1 informed them (says he) that I ex 
 pected to leave them in the spring then approaching, 
 and to be sent to another tribe of Indians at a great 
 distance from them. Upon hearing of which they 
 appeared very sorrowful; and some of them en 
 deavored to persuade me to continue with them, 
 urging that they had now heard so much about their 
 soul s concerns, that they could never more be willing 
 to live as they had done, without a minister, and 
 further instructions in the way to heaven. Where 
 upon I told them, they ought to be willing that oth 
 ers also should hear about their soul s concerns, 
 seeing those needed it as much as themselves. Yet 
 further to dissuade me from going, they added, that 
 those Indians to whom 1 had thought of going (as 
 they had heard) were not willing to become Chris 
 tians as they were, and therefore urged me to tarry 
 with them. I then told them, that they might receive 
 further instruction without me; but the Indians to 
 whom I expected to be sent could not, there being 
 no minister near to teach them." 
 
 In order to further this design, which he had thus 
 made known to his people, Mr. Brainerd determined 
 on another journey to New Jersey, that he might 
 state his views to the commissioners. They accor 
 dingly met him at Elizabethtown, and resolved, 
 "That he should forthwith leave Kaunaumeek and 
 go to Delaware;" and with this resolution he cheer 
 fully complied. His compliance on this occasion; 
 when all circumstances are considered, reflects 
 the highest honor upon his character. He did not 
 rush, like the inexperienced war-horse, into the bat 
 tle. He was not influenced by the fervor of youth, 
 
68 1IFE OF BRAIXERD. 
 
 which overlooks difficulties in the pursuit of a favor 
 ite object, which bestrews aiyuntrodden path with 
 flowers, while it forgets the mars and the thorns: 
 the novelty of the thing had also worn away. Brain- 
 erd knew, from experience, the nature of a mission 
 ary life: for a year he had been placed in the most 
 untoward circumstances; shut out from society; des> 
 tiiute of every earthly comfort; he had to struggle 
 with the ignorance and depravity of barbarians! 
 and in the work dear to his heart lie received also 
 very little encouragement: yet, notwithstanding all 
 this bitter experience, he was willing to encounter 
 the same and greater hardships: he drank into the 
 apostolic spirit; and the noble language of Paul 
 was the language of his conduct: ".None of these 
 things/ move mo; neither count 1 my life dear unto 
 myself, so that I may finish my course with joy." 
 Had he been disposed* he could have made the 
 retreat honorable; especially as at this period he 
 received two very pressing invitations to the pasto 
 ral office; and one was from Easthampton, the finest, 
 pleasantcst town in Long Island, and one of its 
 largest and most wealthy parishes. But the charms 
 of civilized society; the intercourse of Christian 
 friendship; the prospect of emolument and honor 
 among men, were all lost upon the devoted spirit of 
 Brainerd: to these he preferred a "wigwam" among 
 brutish savages; an exile from his native land; the 
 loneliness of a dreary solitude: the difficulties and 
 intense labors of an Indian mission. Having resolved 
 on the field of his subsequent labors, he returned to 
 Kaunaumeek, to prepare for his final departure; 
 and when he had settled his affairs, he commenced 
 a long and dreary journey to the forks of Delaware. 
 And extract from his diary, and from his lettrr to 
 Mr. Pemberton, before quoted, will describe all that 
 "occurred of importance !i: ;ug this journey, as well 
 as the manner in which IIP was received among the 
 Indians, to whom he was sent. 
 
 "May 1. Having receixed new orders to go to the 
 Indians on Delaware river, in Pennsylvania; and my 
 
!LIFE OF BRAINERD. 69 
 
 people here being mostly removed to Mr. Serjeant s, 
 I this day took ail my clothes, books, &c. and dis 
 posed of them, and set out tor Delaware river; but 
 made it in my way to return to Mr. Serjeant s, 
 \vhich I did this day, just at night, 1 rode several 
 hours in the rain through the howling wilderness, al 
 though 1 was so disordered in body, that little or. 
 nothing but blood came from me. 
 
 "Tuesday, May 8. I spent much of my time, 
 while riding, in prayer, that God would go with me 
 to Delaware. My heart sometimes was ready to sink 
 with the thoughts of my work, and going alone, in 
 the wilderness 1 knew not where: but still it was 
 comfortable to think, that others of God s children 
 had wandered about in caves and dens of the earth;* 
 and Abraham, when he was called to go forth, went 
 out, not knowing whither he went. 
 
 "On May 10, I met with a number of Indians in 
 a place called Minnissinks, about an hundred and 
 forty miles from Kaunaumeek, and directly in my 
 way to Delaware river. With these Indians I spent 
 some time, first addressing their king in a friendly 
 manner; and after some discourse, I told him I had 
 a desire to instruct them in Christianity: at which he 
 laughed, and turned his back upon me, and went 
 away. I then addressed another principal man in. 
 the same manner, who said he was willing to hear 
 me. After some time, 1 followed the king into his 
 house, and renewed my discourse to him; but he de 
 clined talking, and left the affair to another, who ap 
 peared to be a rational man. He talked very warm 
 ly, and inquired why I desired the Indians to become 
 Christians, seeing the Christians were so much worse 
 than the Indians. The Christians, he said, would 
 lie, steal, and drink, worse than the Indians. It was 
 they that first taught the Indians to be drunk; and 
 they stole from one another to that degree, that their 
 rulers were obliged to hang them for it, and that was 
 not sufficient to. deter others from the like practice. 
 But the Indians, he added, were none of them ever 
 hanged for stealing; and lie supposed that if the 
 7 
 
70 LIFE 01? BSA1NERD. 
 
 Indians should become Christians, they then would be 
 as bad as these. He added, that they Mould live as 
 their father s lived, and go to tlwir fathers when they 
 died. I then freely owned, lamented, and joined in 
 condemning the ill conduct of some who are called 
 Christians; told him, these were not Christians in 
 heart; that I hated such wicked practices, and did not 
 desire the Indians to become such as these. When 
 lie appeared calmer, 1 asked him if he was willing 
 that I should come and see them again: he replied 
 lie should be willing to see me again as & friend, if I 
 would not desire them to become Christians. 1 then 
 bid them farewell, and prosecuted my journey to 
 wards Delaware. May 13, I arrived at a place, 
 called by the Indians Sakhauwotung, within the 
 Forks of Delaware, in Pennsylvania. 
 
 "Here also, when I came to the Indians, I saluted 
 their king in a manner I thought most engaging; 
 and soon after, informed him of my desire to instruct 
 them in the Christian religion. After he had consult 
 ed a few minutes with two or three old men, he told 
 me he was willing to hear. I then preached to those 
 few that were present, who appeared very attentive. 
 And the king in particular seemed both to wonder, 
 and, at the same time, to be well pleased with what I 
 taught them, respecting the Divine Being. Arid 
 since that time he has ever show n himself friendly to 
 me, giving me free liberty to preach in his house 
 whenever I think fit. Here therefore I spent the 
 greater part of the summer, preaching usually in the 
 king s house. 
 
 "The number of Indians in this place is but small; 
 most of those that formerly belonged here are re 
 moved far bark into the country. There are not 
 more than ten houses hereabouts that continue to be 
 inhabited; and some of these are several miles distant 
 from others, which makes it difficult for the Indians 
 to meet together so frequently as could be desired. 
 
 "When I first began to preach liere^ the number of 
 hearers was very small: often not exceeding twenty, 
 pr twenty-five persons: but towards the latter part 
 
!TFE OF BBAINERD. 71 
 
 of the summer, their number increased, so that I have 
 frequently had forty persons, or more, at once: and 
 of the most of those belonging to those parts. 
 
 "The effects, which the truths of God s word have 
 had upon some of the Indians in this place, are some 
 what encouraging. Sundry of them are brought to 
 renounce idolatry, and to decline partaking of those 
 feasts which they used to offer in sacrifice to certain 
 supposed unknown powers. And some few instances 
 among them have for a considerable time manifested 
 a serious concern for their soul s eternal welfare, 
 and still continue to inquire the way to Zion with 
 such diligence, affection, and becoming solicitude, as 
 gives me reason to Impo, that God who, I trust, has 
 begun this work in them, will carry it on until it 
 shall issue in their saving conversion to himself. 
 These not only detest their old idolatrous notions, 
 but strive also to bring their friends off from them. 
 And as they are seeking salvation for their own 
 souls, so they seem desirous, and some of them take 
 pains, that others might be excited to do the like. 
 
 "Lord s-day, May 13. I rose very early; felt 
 very poorly after my long journey, and after being 
 wet and fatigued. I have scarce ever seen such a 
 gloomy morning in my life; there appeared to be no 
 Sabbath; the children were all at play! I a stranger 
 in the wilderness, and knew not where to go; and all 
 circumstances seemed to conspire to render my 
 affairs dark and discouraging. I mourned after the 
 presence of God, and seemed like a creature banish 
 ed from his sight. Yet he was pleased to support my 
 sinking soul, amidst all my sorrows; so that I never 
 entertained any thought of quitting my business 
 among the poor Indians: but was comforted to think 
 that death would ere long set me free from these dis 
 tresses. I rode about three miles to the Irish people, 
 where I found some that appeared sober and concern 
 ed about religion. My heart then began to be a little 
 encouraged: I preached first to the Irish and then to 
 the Indians; in the evening was a little comforted; 
 my soul seemed to rest on God, and take courage. 
 
7& LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 O that the I^ord would be my support and comforter 
 in an evil world! 
 
 "14. 1 felt myself loose from all the world; all ap 
 peared vanity and vexation of spirit. I seemed 
 lonesome, as it 1 was banished from all mankind, and 
 bereaved of all that is railed pleasurable in the world; 
 but appeared to myself so vile and unworthy it 
 seemed fitter for me to be here than any where else. 
 
 "17. 1 was greatly distressed with a sense of my 
 vilemss; appearing to myself too bad to walk on 
 God s earth. God WHS pleased to let me see my 
 inward pollution to such a degree, that I almost 
 despaired of being made holy. In the afternoon I 
 met with the Indians, and preached to them. My 
 soul seemed to confide in God; and had some en 
 largement in prayer: vital piety and holiness appear 
 ed sweet to me, and I longed for the perfection of it. 
 
 "May 20. 1 preached to the poor Indians, and 
 enjoyed some freedom in speaking. My soul longed 
 for assistance from above, all the while; for I saw I 
 had no strength for that \vork Afterwards 1 preach 
 ed to the Irish people; and several seemed much 
 concerned, with whom I discoursed afterwards with 
 freedom and power. Blessed be God for any assist 
 ance to an unworthy worm. 
 
 "27. I visited my Indians in the morning, and at 
 tended upon a funeral among them, -was affected to 
 see their heathenish practices. O that they might be 
 turned from darkness to light! Afterwards 1 got a 
 considerable number of them together, and preached to 
 them: and observed them very attentive. I then preach 
 ed to the white people, and several seemed much con 
 cerned, especially one who had been educated a 
 Roman catholic. Blessed be the Lord for any help." 
 
 In this situation Mr. Braincrd did not continue a 
 month before he was summoned to Newark, to meet 
 the presbytery, who were engaged solemnly to desig 
 nate him to his office, as missionary among the In 
 dians. The day of ordination is a memorable jera 
 in the life of a minister; it is a period to which he 
 usually looks forward with trembling apprehension, 
 
or BRAINEHB. 73 
 
 the approach of which leads him to the most serious 
 self-scrutiny, as to his motives, his qualifications, his 
 call to the work, and "the necessity that is laid upon 
 him;" and the review of which, after it is past, often 
 agitates him with the mixed sensations of shame and 
 gratitude; and every minister will sympathize with 
 him in the following disclosure of his feelings on this 
 occasion. 
 
 "June 11. This day the presbytery met at New 
 ark, in order to my ordination. I was very weak 
 and disordered in body; yet endeavored to repose my 
 confidence in God. 1 preached my probation ser 
 mon, from Acts xxvi, 17, 18, being a text given me 
 for that end. Afterwards I passed an examination 
 before the presbytery. My mind was burdened with 
 the greatness of that charge I was about to take up 
 on me: so that I could not sleep tiiis night, though 
 very weary and in great need of rest. 
 
 "12. I was this morning further examined re 
 specting my experimental acquaintance with Chris 
 tianity. At ten o clock my ordination was attended; 
 the sermon was preached by Mr. Pemberton. At 
 this time I was affected with a sense of the important 
 trust committed to me; yet was composed and solemn 
 without distraction: and I then (as many times before) 
 gave myself up to God, to be for him, and riot for anoth 
 er. O that I might always be engaged in the service of 
 God, and duly remember the solemn charge I have 
 received in the presence of God, angels, and men." 
 
 Few men, perhaps, ever passed through an ordina 
 tion service, with greater satisfaction to all parties, 
 than Brainerd. Mr. Pemberton, in a letter to the 
 honorable Society in Scotland, by whom he was em 
 ployed, paid him this just and warm tribute of affec 
 tion and respect. 
 
 "We can with pleasure say, that Mr. Brainerd 
 passed through his ordination trials to the universal 
 approbation of the presbytery, and appeared uncom 
 monly qualified for the work of the ministry, fie 
 seems to be armed with a great deal of self-denial, 
 and animated with a noble zeal to propagate the 
 
f4 XIFJE OF BllAIffEKD. 
 
 Gospel among those barbarous nations, who have 
 long dwelt in the darkness of heathenism." 
 
 CHAPTER VI. 
 
 Mh Braincrd s return to Delaware. Extracts from 
 his JJiary. His journies to dijjferent places. His 
 preaching and success* as related by himself, as Jar 
 as to the close of his Jirst journey to Susqnahannak 
 river. Another journey to J\c.rv England. Us ob 
 ject* A second journey to Susquahamwh. His re 
 turn. His arrival at Crosiveeksung. 
 
 IT was mentioned, in commendation of a generous 
 female in the Gospel, by her compassionate Redeem 
 er, < 4 Shc hath done what she could." It is a com 
 mendation which few deserve; arid happy is that 
 minister who on a review of his life can say, that his 
 Lours, his talents, and his whole soul, have been de 
 voted to the service of his God. The utmost we can 
 do is very little, and how hitler the reflection, that 
 even that little has not been accomplished: that we 
 have wasted that time on trifles which should have 
 been devoted to souls, and those energies in the airy 
 concerns of the world, which ought to have been ex 
 hausted in the pursuit of the substantial glories of 
 Messiah s kingdom. Alas, how few imbibe the spirit 
 of their Redeemer, who exclaimed, "My Father 
 worketh hitherto, and I woik." Yet in this, as in 
 every thing, allowing for human infirmity, David 
 .Brainerd followed his great exemplar. The abun 
 dance of his labors, the intenseness of his application, 
 and the constancy of his perseverance in forwarding 
 the great object of his mission, are truly astonishing. 
 And what Foster says of Howard as a philanthropist, 
 applies with equal force to Brainerd as a missionary. 
 And in turning to the passage (1 hope the author will 
 forgive me that it was not written on the tablet of my 
 memory) I find that Brainerd rose to his view when 
 
OF BRAIXEKB. 75 
 
 lie was penning his warm and divine eulogy on the 
 character of Howard. "The energy of his determi 
 nation was so great, that if, instead of being habitual, 
 it had been shown only for a short time on particular 
 occasions, it would have appeared a vehement impet 
 uosity; but by bcingunintermitted, it had an equability 
 of manner which scarcely appeared to exceed the 
 tone of a calm constancy: it was so total! v the reverse 
 of any thing like turbulence or agitation. It was 
 the calmness of an intensity, kept uniform b) the na 
 ture of the human mind forbidding it to be more, 
 and by the character of the individual forbidding it 
 to be less." His conduct -implied an inconceivable 
 severity of conviction, that he had one thing to do; and 
 that he v%ho would do some great thing in this snort 
 life, must apply himself to the work with such a con 
 centration of his forces, as to idle spectators, who 
 live only to amuse themselves, looks like insanity." 
 iirainerd, indeed, "displayed a memorable example 
 of this dedication of his whole being to his office, this 
 eternal abjuration of the quiescent feelings." 
 
 A few days after his ordination, Mr. Brainerd re 
 solved on returning home to his Indians at the Forks 
 of Delaware, but was detained by sickness till the 
 19tb of June. Every thing excited in his bosom 
 pious sensations; and of this painful detention from 
 his favorite employment he made the following sweet 
 improvement. "1 often Admired the goodness of 
 God that he did not suffer me to proceed on my 
 journey from this place (Elizabethtown) where I 
 was so tenderly used, ana to be sick by the way 
 among strangers. God is very gracious to me in 
 health and sickness, and intermingles much mercy 
 with all my afflictions and toils. Knjoyed some 
 sweetness in things divine, in the midst of my pain 
 aod weakness. Oh that I could praise the Lord/* 
 In three days he reached the place of his destination. 
 The following extracts \\ill be interesting to the 
 pious reader, and will teach us how to fee), and to 
 pray, for tiie missionaries of Jesus. 
 
76 I.IFE OF BRAIXERD. 
 
 "Lord s-day, June 24. I was scarce able to walk: 
 however, visited my Indians and look much pains to 
 instruct them. But my mind was burdened with the 
 weight of my work. My whole dependence was on 
 God; who alone could make them willing to receive 
 instruction. My heart was much engaged in send 
 ing up silent requests to God, even while I was 
 speaking to them. O that 1 could always go in the 
 strength of the Lord! 
 
 "25. To an eye of reason every thing that re 
 spects the conversion of the Heathen is as dark as 
 midnight, and yet I cannot but hope in God for the 
 accomplishment of something glorious among them. 
 My soul longed much for the advancement of the 
 Redeemer s kingdom on earth, and was very fearful, 
 lest I should admit some vain thought, and so lose 
 the sense 1 had of divine things. O for an abiding 
 heavenly temper! 
 
 "26. I was much discouraged with the extreme 
 difficulty of the work; yet God supported me; and 
 though the work of their conversion appeared impos 
 sible with man, yet with God I saw all things were 
 possible. My faith was much strengthened, by ob 
 serving the wonderful assistance God afforded Nelie- 
 miah and Ezra, in reforming his people, and re-es 
 tablishing his ancient church. I was much assisted 
 in prayer, especially for the poor Heathen and those 
 of my own charge: and hoped that God would bow 
 the heavens and come down for their salvation. It 
 seemed to me, there could be no impediment to ob 
 struct that glorious work, seeing the living God, as I 
 strongly hoped, was engaged for it. I continued 
 solemnly liftiag up my heart to God, that I might he 
 more mortified to this world, that my soul might be 
 taken up continually in the advancement of Christ s 
 kingdom; and longed that God would purge me 
 more, that I might be as a chosen vessel to bear his 
 name among the Heathen. 
 
 "27. In the afternoon I rode several miles to see 
 if I could procure any lands for the poor Indians, 
 that they might live together, and be under better ad- 
 
LIFE OF BRAIKERB. TT 
 
 vantages For instruction. I had a deep sense of the 
 difficulty of my work; and my soul relied wholly 
 upon God for succesg, ia the diligent and faithful use 
 of means. I saw with the greatest certainty, that 
 Hie arm of the Lord must be revealed, for the help of 
 these poor Heathens, if ever they were delivered 
 from the bondage of the powers of darkness. 
 
 28. Towards noon 1 rode to the Indians; and 
 while going, my heart went up to God in prayer for 
 them; I could freely tell God he knew the cause was 
 not mine, but his own, and it would be for his own 
 glory to convert the poor Indians: and blessed be 
 God, I felt no desire of honor from the world, as the 
 instrument of it. 
 
 "30, My soul was much solemnized in reading 
 God s word; especially the ninth chapter of Daniel. 
 I saw how God had called out, his servants to prayer, 
 and made them wrestle with him, when he designed 
 to bestow any great mercy on his church. And I 
 was ashamed of myself, to think of my dulness and 
 inactivity, when there seemed to be so much to do for 
 the upbuilding of Zion. Oh, how does Ziori lie 
 waste! I longed, that the church of God might be 
 enlarged: and was enabled to pray, in faith; my soul 
 sensibly confided in God, and was enabled to wres 
 tle with him. Afterwards, I went to a place of re 
 tirement, and enjoyed assistance in prayer again: 
 had a sense of my great need of Divine help, and 
 felt my soul sensibly depend on God. 
 
 ** Lord s- day j July 1. Alter I came to the In 
 dians, my mind was confused; and I felt nothing of 
 that sweet reliance on God, that my soul has been 
 comforted with in days past. In the afternoon I felt 
 still barren: when I began to preach, 1 seemed to 
 myself to know nothing, and to have nothing to say 
 to the Indians; but soon after, I found a spirit of 
 love, and warmth, and power, to address the poor 
 Indians; and God helped me to plead witii them, to 
 turn from all the vanities of the Heathen, to the liv 
 ing God. I am persuaded, the Lord touched their 
 consciences; for I never saw such attention in them 
 
78 LIFE OF BRAINEED. 
 
 before. When I came away, I spent the whole time 
 J was riding in prayer and praise to God. Alter 1 
 had rode two miles? it came into^fiy mind to dedicate 
 myself to God again; which I did with great solem 
 nity, and unspeakable satisfaction; especially giving 
 up myself to him anew in the work of the ministry. 
 And this I did without any exception or reserve; not 
 in the least shrinking hack from any difficulties, that 
 might attend this hlessed work. I was most free, 
 cheerful, ami full in this dedication of myself. My 
 whole soul cried, Lord, to thee I dedicate myself: O 
 accept of me, and let me he thine for ever. Lord, I 
 desire nothing more. O come, come Lord, accept a 
 poor worm. Whom have f in heaven but thee? and 
 there is none upon earth that I desire besides thee. 
 I was enabled to praise God with my whole soul, that 
 lie had enabled me to consecrate all my powers to 
 him in this solemn manner. I rejoiced in my par 
 ticular work as a missionary: rejoiced in my neces 
 sity of self-denial; and still continued to give up my 
 self to God; praying incessantly, every moment, 
 with sweet fervency. My nature being very weak 
 of late, was now considerably overcome: my fingers 
 grew very feeble, so that I could scarcely stretch 
 them out straight: and when lighted from my horse, 
 I could hardly walk; my joints seeming all to be 
 loosed. Rut I felt abundant strength of the inner 
 man. I preached to the white people, and God 
 helped me much. Sundry of my poor Indians were 
 so moved as to come to meeting also: and one 
 appeared much concerned. 
 
 "6. f am, of late, most of all concerned for min 
 isterial qualifications, and the conversion of the 
 Heathen: last year, I longed to be prepared for the 
 world of glory, and speedily to depart (tut of this 
 world; but of late my chief concern is for the con 
 version of the Heathen; and for that end I long to 
 live. But blessed he God, I have less desire to live 
 for any of the pleasures of the world, than ever ! 
 had: I long and love to be a pilgrim; and want graro 
 to imitate the life, labors, and sufferings of St. Pawl 
 
I.IFE OF BEAINERII. 79 
 
 among the Heathen. And when I long for holiness 
 now, it is chiefly, that thereby 1 may become an 
 able minister of the New Testament, especially to 
 the Heathen. I spent two hours this morning in 
 reading and prayer; and was in a watchful tender 
 frame, afraid of every thing that might cool my 
 affections, and draw away my heart from God. 
 
 "21. Towards night my burden respecting my 
 work among the Indians began to increase much; and 
 was aggravated by hearing sundry tilings that look 
 ed very discouraging, in particular,that they intended 
 to meet together the next day for an idolatrous feast 
 and dance. Then 1 began to be in anguish: I thought I 
 must in conscience go and endeavor to break them up; 
 and knew not how to attempt such a thing. How 
 ever, I withdrew to prayer, hoping for strength from 
 above. And in prayer 1 was exceedingly enlarged, 
 and my soul was much drawn out. 1 pleaded with 
 so much earnestness and importunity, that when I 
 rose from my knees, I could scarcely walk straight, 
 my joints were loosed, the sweat ran down my lace 
 and body, and nature seemed as if it would dissolve. 
 I knew they were met together to worship devils, and 
 not God, and this made me cry earnestly, that God 
 would appear and help me in my attempts to break 
 up this idolatrous meeting. My soul pleaded long; 
 and I thought God would go with me to vindicate his 
 own cause: and thus I spent the evening, praying 
 incessantly that I might not be self-dependent, but 
 have my whole dependence upon God. What I 
 passed through was inexpressible. All things here 
 below vanished; and there appeared to be nothing of 
 any importance to me, but holiness of heart arid life, 
 and the conversion of the Heathen to God. All my 
 eares, fears, and desires, which might be said to be 
 of a worldly nature disappeared: and were of little 
 more importance, than a puff of wind. I exceed 
 ingly longed, that God would get to himself a name 
 among the Heathen; and I appealed to him with the 
 greatest freedom, that he knew I preferred him 
 $bove my chief joy. Indeed I had no notion of joy 
 
80 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 from this world; I cared not where or how 1 lived, 
 or what hardships 1 went through, so that I could 
 but gain souls to Christ. 
 
 "Lord s -da^, 22. When I waked, my soul was 
 burdened with what seemed to he before me; 1 cried 
 to God, before I could get out of bed: as soon as I 
 was dressed, 1 withdrew into the woods, to pour out 
 my soul to him for assistance; and did with unspeak 
 able freedom give up myself afresh to God, for life 
 or death, for all hardships he should call me to 
 among the Heathen; and felt as if nothing could dis 
 courage my hope from this blessed work. I had a 
 strong hope, that God would bow the heavens and 
 come down, and do some marvellous work among 
 the Heathen. Arid when I was riding to the Indians, 
 my heart was. continually going up to God; and 
 hoping, that God would make this the day of his 
 power and grace amongst t5ie poor Indians. "When 
 I came to them, I found them engaged in their frolic; 
 but through Divine goodness, I got them to break up 
 and attend my preaching; yet still there appeared 
 nothing- of the special power of God among them. 
 I preached again to them in the afternoon: and ob 
 served they were more sober than before; but still 
 saw nothing special among them; from whence 
 satan took occasion to buffet me with cursed sugges 
 tions, there is no God, or if there be he is not able 
 to convert the Indians, before they have more knov/I- 
 edge.* I was very weak and weary, and rny soul 
 borne down with perplexity; but was determined 
 still to wait upon God." 
 
 His engagements about this time will appear from 
 the account which he wrote to Mr. Pemberton, which, 
 as it \\ill continue the narrative, I will here tran 
 scribe. 
 
 "In July last, I heard of a number of Indians re 
 siding at the place called Kauksesauchung, more 
 tiian thirty miles westward from the place where I 
 usually preach. I visited them, though in order to 
 reach them it was necessary to cross a hideous 
 mountain, found about thirty persons, and proposed 
 
OF BBAINERD. 81 
 
 my desire of preaching to them; they readily com 
 plied, and I preached to them only twice, they being 
 just then removing from this place, where they only 
 lived for the present, to Susquahannah river, where 
 they belonged. 
 
 "While I was preaching, they appeared sober and 
 attentive: and were somewhat surprised, having nev 
 er before heard of such things. There were two or 
 three who suspected, that I had some ill design upon 
 them; and urged that the white people had abused 
 them, and taken their lands from them, and there 
 fore they had no reason to think that they were now 
 concerned for their happiness: but on the contrary 
 that they designed to make them slaves, or get them 
 on board their vessels, and make them fight with the 
 people over the water, (as they expressed it,) mean 
 ing the French and Spaniards. However the most 
 of them appeared very friendly, and told me they 
 were then going directly home to Susquahannah, and 
 desired 1 would make them a visit there, and mani 
 fested a considerable desire of farther instruction. 
 This invitation gave me some encouragement in my 
 great work; and made me hope that God designed 
 to open an effectual door to me for spreading the 
 Gospel among the poor Heathen further westward. * 
 
 His diary, at this time, represents him as dejected 
 in mind, and afflicted in body, while he was with 
 these Indians, and actively engaged to promote their 
 eternal happiness; he complains, "I was weak and 
 felt something disconsolate: yet could have no free 
 dom in the thought of any other circumstances, or 
 business of life: all my desire was the conversion of 
 the Heathen, and all my hope was in God. God 
 does not suffer me to please or comfort myself with 
 hopes of seeing friends, returning to my dear ac 
 quaintance, and enjoying worldly comforts." On 
 Thursday he returned home exceedingly fatigued 
 and spent; still in the same frame of mortification 
 to the world, and solicitous for the advancement of 
 Christ s kingdom. The two remaining days of the 
 week, he was most seriously indisposed, and on the 
 8 
 
62 LIFE OF BRAINF.RD. 
 
 Sabbath he was confined to his cottage. He was ex 
 tremely ill for nearly a month, and then gradually 
 recovered. In his diary of the first and second 
 weeks, we meet with these affecting lines. 
 
 l think 1 never before endured such a season of 
 distressing weakness; my nature is so spent, that I 
 can neither stand, sit, nor lie with any quiet; 1 am 
 exercised with extreme faintness and sickness at my 
 stomach; and my mind is as much disordered as my 
 body, seeming to be stupid, and without all kind of 
 affections; and yet perplexed to think that I live for 
 nothing, that precious time rolls away, and 1 can do 
 nothing but trifle. 
 
 <*0n Lord s-day, August 5. Was still very poor 
 ly. But though very weak, I visited and preached 
 to the poor Indians twice, and was strengthened 
 vastly beyond rny expectations, And indeed, the 
 Lord gave me freedom and fervency in addressing 
 them; and though I had not strength enough to stand, 
 but was obliged to sit down the whole time. Towards 
 night I was extremely weak, faint, sick, and full of 
 pain. And I have continued much the same last 
 week, through the most of this, (it being now Fri 
 day,) unable to engage in any business; frequently 
 unable to pray in the family. I have neither strength 
 to read, meditate, nor pray: and this perplexes my 
 mind. I seem like a man that has all his estate em 
 barked in one small boat, unhappily going adrift 
 down a swift current. The poor owner stands on 
 shore and looks and laments his loss. But alas! 
 though all seems to be adrift, and J stand and see it, 
 1 dare not lament; for this sinks my spirits more, 
 and aggravates my bodily disorders. O that God 
 would pity my distressed state!" 
 
 Tuesday after his return he wrote the following 
 truly spiritual and affectionate letter to a special 
 friend. 
 
1IFE OF BRAINERD. 83 
 
 LETTER. 
 
 Forks of Delaware, July 31, 1744. 
 
 Certainly the greatest, the noblest pleasure of 
 intelligent creatures must result from their acquaint 
 ance with the blessed God, and with their own im 
 mortal souls. And oh, how divinely sweet is it, to 
 look into our own souls, when we can find all our 
 passions united and engaged in pursuit after God, 
 our whole souls passionately breathing after a con 
 formity to him, and the full enjoyment of him! Verily 
 there are no hours pass away with so much pleasure, 
 as t!y>se that are spent in communing with God, and 
 our own hearts. Oh, how sweet is a spirit of devo 
 tion, a spirit of seriousness and Divine solemnity, a 
 spirit of Gospel simplicity, love, tenderness! Oh, 
 how desirable, and how profitable to the Christian 
 life, is a spirit of holy watchfulness, and godly jeal 
 ousy over ourselves; when we are afraid of nothing 
 so much as that we shall grieve and offend the bless 
 ed God, whom we apprehend to be a father and 
 friend; whom we then love and long to please! 
 Surely this is a temper, worthy of the highest ambi 
 tion and closest pursuit of intelligent creatures. 
 Oh, how greatly superior is the peace, arid satisfac 
 tion derived from these Divine frames, to that which 
 we sometimes pursue in things impertinent and tri- 
 flirig ! Our own bitter experience teaches us, that 
 in the midst of such laughter the heart is sorrowful, 
 and there is no true satisfaction, but in God. But, 
 alas! how shall we obtain and retain this sweet 
 spirit of religion? Let us follow the apostle s direc 
 tion, Phil, ii, 12, and labor upon the encouragement 
 he there mentions, for it is God only can afford us 
 this favor; and he will be sought, and it is fit we 
 should wait upon him, for so rich a mercy. Oh, may 
 the God of all grace afford us the influences of his 
 Spirit: and help us that we may, from our hearts, 
 esteem it our greatest liberty and happiness, that 
 whether we live, we may live to the Lord, or wheth 
 er we die, we may die to the Lord; that in life and 
 
 in lip a tli. \vf mnv lio liie? 
 
84 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 I am in a very poor state of health: but through 
 Divine goodness, 1 am not discontented: 1 bless 
 God for this retirement! I never was more thank 
 ful for any thing, than I have been of late for the 
 necessity 1 am under of self-denial: I love to be a 
 pi grini and stranger in this wilderness; it seems 
 most fit for such a poor, ignorant, worthless creature 
 as I. I would not change my present mission for 
 any other business in the whole world. 1 may tell 
 you freely, that God has of late given me great free 
 dom and fervency in prayer, when 1 have been so 
 weak and feeble, that my nature seemed as if it 
 would speedily dissolve. I feel as if my all was lost 
 and I was undone, if the poor heathen be not con 
 verted. 1 feel different from what I did when I saw 
 you last, more crucified to all the enjoyments of life. 
 It would be very refreshing to me, to see you here 
 in this desert; especially in my most disconsolate 
 Lours; but 1 could be content never to see you or 
 any of my friends again in this world, if God would 
 bless my labors to the conversion of the poor In 
 dians. I have much that I could willingly commu 
 nicate to you, which I must omit, till Providence 
 gives us leave to see each other. In the mean time, 
 I rest, your obliged friend and servant, 
 
 D. BRAIKERD." 
 
 After this he went a journey into New England, 
 and was absent from the forks of Delaware about 
 Ihree weeks. On his return he inscribed this grate 
 ful record on a page of his diary. "What reason 
 have I to bless God, who has preserved me in riding 
 more than four hundred and twenty miles, and has 
 krpt all my bones that not one of them has been broken. 
 My health likewise is greatly recovered. O that I 
 coold dedicate my all to God; this is all the return 
 I can make to him." 
 
 On the Monday following, October I, he began to 
 prepare for his journey to Susquahannah; not that he 
 had temporal affairs to settle, or worldly business to 
 arrange, but he had the Divine blessing to implore 1 . 
 
LIFE OF BRAIKERD. 85 
 
 The welfare of the poor pagans he was about to 
 visit, was a concern too momentous not to interest 
 his pious feelings; and the sense of his own insuffi 
 ciency to save them from the wrath to corne, was too 
 powerful an impression not to lead him to a throne of 
 grace, in their and his own behalf, This journey 
 was not to be solitary as those which he had before 
 taken. In Mr. Byram, minister at a place called 
 Rockciticus, about forty miles from his own residence, 
 he found a profitable companion. 
 
 October 2. I set out (he observes in his diary) 
 on my journey, in company with my dear brother 
 JByram, and my interpreter, and two chief Indians, 
 from the forks of Delaware. We travelled about 
 twenty-five miles, and lodged in one of the last 
 houses on our road; after which there was nothing 
 but a hideous arid howling wilderness. 
 
 "3. We went on our way into the wilderness, and 
 found far the most difficult and dangerous travelling 
 that ever any of us had seen; we had scarce any 
 thing else but lofty mountains, deep valleys, and hid 
 eous rocks, to make our way through. However, I 
 felt sweetness in divine things, and had my mind 
 intensely engaged in meditation. Near night, my 
 beast that 1 rode upon, hung one of her legs in the 
 rocks, and fell down under me; but through Divine 
 goodness, I was not hurt. However she broke her 
 leg; and being near thirty miles from any house, I 
 saw nothing that could be done to preserve her life, 
 and so was obliged to kill her, and prosecute my 
 journey on foot. Just at dark, we kindled a fire, cut 
 up a few bushes, and made a shelter over our heads, 
 to save us from the frost, which was very hard; and 
 committing ourselves to God we lay down on the 
 ground, and slept quietly." 
 
 The next day they went forward on their journey, 
 and at night took up their lodging in the woods as 
 before, and on the day following they arrived at the 
 place of their destination. 
 
 "5. We arrived at Susquahannah river, /at a 
 place called Opeholhaupung; found there twelVe In. 
 
8.6 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 dian houses; after I had saluted the king in a 
 friendly manner, I told him my business, and that 
 my desire was to teach them Christianity. After 
 some consultation, the Indians gathered, and I 
 preached to them. And when I had done, I asked,, 
 if they would hear me again. They replied, they 
 would consider of it; and soon after sent me word, 
 that they would immediately attend, if I would 
 preach; which 1 did with much freedom. When I 
 asked them again, whether they would hear me fur 
 ther, they replied they would the next day. I was 
 exceeding sensible of the impossibility of doing any 
 thing for the poor heathen without special assistance; 
 and my soul rested on God, and left it to him, to do 
 as he pleased in his own cause. 
 
 "6. I preached again to the Indians: and in the 
 afternoon, visited them from house to house, and 
 invited them to come and hear me again the next day, 
 and put off their hunting design till Monday. This 
 night the Lord stood by me, to encourage and 
 strengthen my soul: I spent more than an hour in 
 secret retirement; and was enabled to pour out my 
 heart before God, for the increase of grace in my 
 soul, for ministerial endowments, and for success 
 among the poor Indians. 
 
 "October 8. I visited the Indians with a design 
 to take my leave, supposing they would go out a hunt 
 ing early; but beyond my expectation and hope, they 
 desired to hear me preach again. I gladly complied 
 with their request, and endeavored to answer their 
 objections against Christianity. Then they went 
 away; and we spent the afternoon in reading and 
 prayer, intending to go homeward early the next 
 day." 
 
 On his reception among these Indians, in his let 
 ter to Mr. Pemberton, he has the following remarks. 
 
 "The iwen, I think, universally (except one) at 
 tended my preaching. Only the women supposing 
 the affair we were upon to be of a public nature, be 
 longing only to the men, and not what every indi 
 vidual person should concern himself with, could not 
 
LIKE OJ? BRAINERD. 87 
 
 readily be persuaded to come and hear. But after 
 much pains used with them for that purpose, some 
 few ventured to come and stand at a distance. 
 
 "When I had preached to the Indians several 
 times, some of them very frankly proposed what they 
 had to object against Christianity; and so gave me a 
 fair opportunity for using my best endeavors to re 
 move from their minds those scruples and jealousies 
 they labored under; and when I had endeavored to an 
 swer their objections, some appeared much satisfied. 
 I then asked the king if he was willing 1 should visit 
 and preach to them again, if I should live to the 
 next spring: he replied, he should be heartily willing 
 for his own part, and added he wished the young 
 people vvould learn, &c. 1 then put the same ques 
 tion to the rest. Some answered they vvould be very 
 glad, and none manifested any dislike to it. There 
 were sundry other things in their behavior, with 
 a comfortable and encouraging aspect; that upon the 
 whole, I could not but rejoice 1 had taken that 
 journey among them, although it was attended with 
 many difficulties and hardships. The method I used 
 with them, and the instructions I gave them, 1 am 
 persuaded were means, in some measure to remove 
 their heathenish jealousies and prejudices against 
 Christianity; and I could not but hope the God of all 
 grace was preparing their minds to receive the 
 *truth as it is in Jesus. If this, may be the happy 
 consequence, I shall not only rejoice in my past labors 
 and fatigues; but shall I trust, also l be willing to 
 spend and be spent, if I may thereby be instrumen 
 tal to turn them from darkness to light, and from 
 the power of Satan to God. 
 
 On Tuesday, Oct. 9, Mr. Brainerd and his com 
 panion left Susquahannah, and encountering the 
 same hardships on their return, as in going, they at 
 length arrived safe at home, And in his diary, for 
 October 12, there is this memorandum. 
 
 "Friday 12. Rode home to rny lodgings; where 
 I poured out my soul to God, and endeavored to bless 
 him, for his abundant goodness to me in my late jouj^= 
 
88 LIFE OF BRUNERD. 
 
 ney. I scarce ever enjoyed more health; and God 
 marvellously, and almost miraculously supported me 
 under the fatigues of the way, and travelling on foot. 
 Blessed be ihe Lord, that preserves me in all my 
 ways." 
 
 The following are the most remarkable things in 
 his diary at this period. 
 
 "Lord s-day, 14. 1 was much confused and per 
 plexed in my thoughts; and almost discouraged, 
 thinking I should never be able to preach any more. 
 However, 1 went to the place of public worship, lift 
 ing up my heart, and God was gracious to me, and 
 helped me to plead with him for holiness, and to use 
 strong arguments with him, drawn from the sufferings 
 of Christ for this very end, that men might be made 
 holy. Afterwards I was much assisted in preaching. 
 1 know not that God ever helped me to preach in a 
 more close manner. Through the infinite goodness 
 of God, I felt what 1 spake; and God enabled me to 
 speak with uncommon clearness: and yet 1 was 
 deeply sensible of my defects in preaching; blessed 
 be the Lord for his mercy. In the evening I longed 
 to be entirely alone, to bless God for help in extrem 
 ity: and longed for greater degrees of holiness, that 
 I might show my gratitude to God. 
 
 "16. I felt a spirit of solemnity and watchful 
 ness; and was afraid I should not live to and upon 
 God; 1 longed for more intenseness and spirituality. 
 In the evening I enjoyed sweet assistance in prayer, 
 and thirsted and pleaded to be as holy as the blesse.d 
 angels. 
 
 "19. I had an abasing sense of my own imholi- 
 ness; and felt my soul melt and mourn, that I had 
 grieved a gracious God, who was still kind to me; 
 notwithstanding all my unworthiness. My soul en 
 joyed a sweet season of sorrow, that I had wronged 
 that blessed God, who W 7 as reconciled to me in his 
 dear Son. My soul was now tender, and devout, and 
 solemn; and I was afraid of nothing but sin; and 
 afraid of that in every action and thought. 
 
JLIFE OF BRAINERD. 89 
 
 "24. Near noon I rode to my people: spent some 
 time, and prayed with them; felt the frame of a pil 
 grim on earth; longed much to leave this gloomy 
 mansion; but yet found patience and resignation. As 
 1 returned home from the Indians, i spent the whole 
 time in lifting up my heart to God. 
 
 "In the evening, 1 enjoyed a blessed season in 
 prayer; was enabled to cry to God with a child-like 
 spirit; enjoyed a sweet freedom in supplicating for 
 myself, and for my dear friends, longed to be as 
 lively in God s service as the angels. 
 
 "26. In the morning, my soul was melted with a 
 sense of divine goodness to such a vile*lvorm: I 
 delighted to lean upon God and place my whole trust 
 in him: my soul was exceedingly grieved for sin, 
 and prized and longed after holiness; it wounded 
 my heart deeply, yet sweetly, to think how I had 
 abused a kind God. I longed to be perfectly holy, 
 that I might not grieve a gracious God: I longed 
 for holiness more for this end than for my happiness 
 sake; and yet this was my greatest happiness, never 
 more to dishonor, but always to glorify the blessed 
 God. 
 
 "Oct. St. I was sensible of my barrenness: my 
 soul failed when I remembered the fervency 1 had 
 enjoyed. Ob, I thought, if I could but be spiritual, 
 warm, heavenly-minded, and affectionately breathing 
 after God, this would be better than life to me! My 
 soul longed exceedingly for death, to be loosed from 
 this dulness, and made ever active in the service 
 of God. I seemed to live for nothing, and to do no 
 good: and oh, the burden of such a life! Oh death, 
 death, my kind friend, hasten and deliver me from 
 dull mortality, and make me spiritual, and vigorous 
 to eternity! 
 
 "Nov. 1. I felt life, and longings after God; I 
 longed to be always solemn, devout, and heavenly- 
 minded; and was afraid to leave off praying, lest I 
 should again lose a sense of the sweet things of God. 
 "2. 1 was exercised sorely with some things that 
 I thought myself most of all freed from. And thus 
 
90 I.IFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 I have ever found it, when I have thought the hattle 
 was over and the conquest was gained, and so let 
 down my watch, the enemy lias risen up, and done me 
 the greatest injury. " 
 
 In the beginning of November, Mr. Braincrd 
 wrote the letter to which ^e have several times al 
 luded, in which he relates to Mr. Pembcrton his va 
 rious journies and success, from the time of his he- 
 coming a missionary down to his return from Sus- 
 quahannah. And this is the most suitable place to 
 introduce the account which that letter contains of 
 the great difficulties, which are the powerful obsta 
 cles to tffe diffusion of divine truth among unciviliz 
 ed idolaters. 
 
 "In the first place, their minds are filled with 
 prejudices against Christianity, on account of the 
 vicious lives and unchristian behavior of some that 
 are called Christians. These not only set before 
 them the worst examples, but some of them take 
 pains, expressly in words, to dissuade them from be 
 coming Christians; foreseeing that if these should be 
 converted to God, <the hope of their unlawful gain 
 would be lost. 
 
 "Again these poor Heathens are extremely attach 
 ed to the customs, traditions, and fabulous notions 
 of their fathers: and this one seems to be the foun 
 dation of all their other motives, viz. that it was 
 not the same God made them who made the white 
 people, but another, who commanded them to live by 
 hunting, &c. and not conform to the customs of the 
 white people. Hence, when they are desired to be 
 come Christians, they frequently reply, that 4 they 
 will live as their fathers lived, and go to their fathers 
 when they die.- And if the miracles of Christ, and 
 his apostles, be mentioned, to prove the truth of 
 Christianity, they also mentioned sundry miracles 
 which their fathers have told (hem were anciently 
 wrought among the Indians, and which satan makes 
 them believe w 7 ere so. They are much attached to 
 idolatry; frequently making feasts, which they eat in 
 honor of some unknown beings, who, they suppose, 
 
LIFE OF BRAIXERD. <H 
 
 speak to them in dreams, promising them success in 
 hunting, and other affairs, in case they will sacri 
 fice to them. They oftentimes, also, offer their sa 
 crifices to the spirits of the dead, who, they suppose, 
 stand in need of favors from the living, and ) et are 
 in such a state as that they can well reward all the 
 offices of kindness that are shown them: and they 
 impute all their calamities to the neglect of these 
 sacrifices. Furthermore, they are much awed by 
 those among themselves who are called Powwows, 
 who are supposed to have a power of enchanting, or 
 poisoning them to death, or at least in a very dis 
 tressing manner; and they apprehend it would be 
 their sad fate to be thus enchanted in case they 
 should become Christians. 
 
 "Lastly, the manner of their living is likewise a 
 great disadvantage to the design of their being 
 Christianized. They are almost continually roving 
 from place to place; and it is but rare, that an op 
 portunity can be had with some of them for their 
 instruction. There is scarcely any time of the 
 year, wherein the men can be found generally at 
 home, except about six weeks before, and in the sea 
 son of planting their corn,- and about two months in 
 the latter part of summer, from the time they be 
 gin to roast their corn until it is fit to gather in. 
 
 "As to the hardships that necessarily attend a mis 
 sion among them; the fatigue of frequent journey 
 ing in the wilderness; the unpleasantness of a mean 
 and hard way of living; and the great difficulty of 
 addressing a people of a strange language; these I 
 shall at present pass over in silence, designing what 
 1 have already said of difficulties attending this 
 work, not for the discouragement of any, but rather 
 for the incitement of all, who love the appearing and 
 kingdom of Christ, to frequent the throne of grace 
 with constant supplications, that the heathen, who 
 were anciently promised to Christ for his inherit 
 ance, may now actually and speedily be brought into 
 his kingdom of grace, and made heirs of immortal 
 glory." 
 
02 LIFE OF BRAINEKD. 
 
 After writing this letter, Mr. Brainerd was called 
 to New York, to a meeting of the presbytery, and 
 was gone from home nearly a fortnight. His jour 
 ney was very fatiguing, and he was often exposed to 
 the severest cold. Through his hodily exertions, and 
 the unfavorable weather in which he travelled, his 
 constitution received a most serious shock; and on 
 his return, he was, for several days, detained by 
 illness at New Jersey. When he left Rockciticus, 
 for Delaware River, which was on Thursday, Nov. 
 23d he struggled with very great difficulties, an ac 
 count of which he thus relates: 
 
 "Nov. 22. 1 came on my way to Delaware river, 
 though much disordered with a cold and pain in my 
 headr About six at night I lost my way in the wil 
 derness, and wandered over rocks and mountains, 
 down hideous steeps, through swamps, and most 
 dreadful and dangerous places; and the night being 
 dark, I was greatly exposed: I was much pinched 
 with cold, and distressed with an extreme pain in my 
 head, attended with sickness at my stomach; so that 
 every step I took was distressing to me. I had little 
 hope but that I must lie in the woods all night. But 
 about nine o clock, I found a house, and was kindly 
 entertained. Thus I have frequently been exposed: 
 but God has hitherto preserved me blessed be his 
 name. Such fatigues and hardships serve to wean 
 me from earth, and will make heaven the sweeter. 
 Formerly, when I was thus exposed, 1 was ready to 
 please myself with the thoughts of a comfortable 
 house, a warm fire, and other outward comforts; but 
 now these have less place in my heart (through the 
 grace of God,) and my eye is more to God for com 
 fort. In this world I expect tribulation: and it does 
 not now appear strange to me; 1 do not, in seasons 
 of difficulty, flatter myself that it will be better here 
 after; but rather think how much worse it might be; 
 how much greater trials others of God s children 
 have endured; and how much greater are yet per 
 haps reserved for me Blessed be God, that he 
 makes the thoughts of my journey s end a great 
 
II FE OF BRAIN EBB. 93 
 
 comfort to me under my sharpest trials; and scarce 
 ever lets these thoughts be attended with terror, but 
 frequently with joy." 
 
 From this time, November, 1744, he continued at 
 Delaware till the following month in the next year, 
 actively engaged in discharging the various duties 
 of his arduous employment; preaching frequently, 
 and visiting his Indians, from house to house, and 
 from day to day. 
 
 His exercises of mind, during this period, were 
 like those before recorded. Sometimes he was greatly 
 dejected; and at others, comforted in enjoying the 
 peace of God, which passeth understanding. The 
 most remarkable passages I shall here transcribe. 
 
 "Friday, November 23. Visited a sick man: dis 
 coursed and prayed with him. Then visited another 
 house, where one was dead and laid out: looked on 
 the corpse, and longed that my time might come to 
 depart, that I might be with Christ." 
 
 Within the next twelve days he spent much time 
 in hard labor, with others, to make for himself a lit 
 tle cottage, to live in by himself. 
 
 "Dec. 6. Having now a happy opportunity of be 
 ing retired in a house of my own, 1 set apart this 
 day for secret prayer and fasting, to implore the 
 blessing of God on myself, on my poor people, on my 
 friends, and on the church of God. And now God 
 was pleased to give me a discovery of the plague of 
 my own heart, more affecting than I have of late had. 
 Anirespecially 1 saw my sinfulness in this, that when 
 God had withdrawn himself, instead of living and 
 dying in pursuit of him, 1 have been disposed to one 
 of these two things, either to yield an unbecoming 
 respect to some earthly objects, as if happiness were 
 to be derived from them; or to be secretly froward 
 and impatient, and unsuitably desirous of death. 
 That which often drove me to this impatient desire 
 of death, was a despair of doing good in life. But 
 now God made me sensible of my sin, and enabled 
 me to cry to him for forgiveness, Yet this was not 
 all I wanted; for my soul appeared exceedingly po!- 
 9 
 
94 HIE 01? 
 
 luted; and I wanted to be purified <by the blood of 
 sprinkling that cleanseth from all sin. And this I 
 \vas enabled to pray for in faith. 1 enjoyed much 
 more intenseness, fervency, and spirituality, than I 
 expected: God was better to me than ray fears. I 
 was enabled to persevere in prayer till the evening: 
 I saw so much need of divine help, in every respect, 
 that I knew not how to leave oft", and had forgot that 
 1 needed food. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Dec. 9. I preached, both parts of the 
 day, at a place called Greenwich, about ten miles 
 from my own house. In the first discourse 1 had 
 scarce any warmth. In the intermission season I 
 got alone among the bushes, and cried to God. being 
 in great anguish, that I could riot address souls with 
 more compassion, and tender affection; which I saw 
 I could not get of myself, any more than I could 
 make a world, in the latter exercise, blessed be the 
 Lord, 1 had some fervency, both in prayer and 
 preaching; and in the application I was enabled to 
 address precious souls with affection, tenderness, and 
 importunity. The Spirit of God was there; the ef- 
 jfects were apparent, tears running down many cheeks. 
 
 "12. I was very weak; but assisted in secret pray 
 er, and enabled with sweetness to cry, Come, Lord 
 Jesus! come quickly. My soul longed for God, for 
 the living God. O how delightful it is to pray under 
 such influences! How much better than one s neces 
 sary food! I had at this time no disposition to eat 
 (though late in the morning;) for earthly food ap 
 peared wholly tasteless. I visited and preached to 
 the Indians in the afternoon, but under much dejec 
 tion. I found my interpreter under some concern for 
 his soul, which was some comfort to me. I longed 
 greatly for his conversion, poured out my soul to 
 God for him, and was enabled to leave all with God. 
 
 "13. I spent the day in fasting and prayer, to im 
 plore the Divine blessing, more especially on my 
 poor people; in particular for my interpreter, and 
 three or four more under some concern for their 
 souls: but in the evening it seemed as if I had need 
 
LIFE OF BR AOERD. 95 
 
 to pray for nothing so much as for the pardon of sins 
 committed in the day past. The sins I had most 
 sense of, were pride and wandering thoughts. Yet, 
 after all my sorrows, I trust this day, and the exer 
 cises of it, have been for my good, and taught me 
 more of my weakness without Christ than 1 knew 
 he fore. 
 
 "LordVday, Dec. 16. I was so overwhelmed 
 with dejection, that I knew not how to live: I longed 
 for death exceedingly; my soul was sunk into deep 
 waters,! and the floods were ready to droivn me: I was 
 so much oppressed, that my soul was in a kind of 
 horror: I had no distressing douht ahout my own 
 state, hut would have cheerfully ventured (as far as 
 1 could know) into eternity. While I was going to 
 preach to the Indians, my soul was in anguish; I 
 despaired of doing any good. But at last 1 insisted 
 on the evidences of Christianity from the miracles of 
 Christ: and God helped me to make a close applica 
 tion to those that refused to believe. 1 was encour 
 aged to find, that God enabled me to be faithful ones 
 more. Then I went and preached to another com 
 pany of them; but was very weary and faint. In 
 the evening I was something refreshed, and enabled 
 to pray and praise God with composure and affec 
 tion: I was now willing to live, and longed to do 
 more for God than my weak state of body would ad 
 mit of. *I can do all things through Christ that 
 strengthens me; and I am willing to spend and 62 
 spent in his service. 
 
 "18. I went to the Indians, and discoursed to 
 them near an hour; and at last God helped me to 
 speak with warmth. My interpreter also was amaz 
 ingly assisted; and I doubt not but the Spirit of 
 God was upon him. And presently most of the 
 grown persons were much affected, and the tears ran 
 down their cheeks; and one old man (I suppose an 
 hundred years old) was so affected, that he wept, 
 and seemed convinced of the importance of what I 
 taught them. I staid with them a considerable time, 
 exhorting theroj and came away, lifting up my heart 
 
96 XIFE OF ERAINERU. 
 
 to God, and encouraged my interpreter to strive to 
 enter in at the strait gate. 
 
 "Jan. 9, 1745. In the morning, God was pleased 
 to remove that gloom which has of late oppressed 
 my mind, and gave me freedom and sweetness in 
 prayer. I was encouraged to plead for grace for 
 myself, and mercy for my poor Indians; and was 
 sweetly assisted in my intercessions with God for 
 others. Those things that of late seemed almost 
 impossible, now appear not only possible, but easy. 
 My soul so much delighted to continue instant in 
 prayer, at this blessed season, that 1 had no desire 
 for my necessary food, I even dreaded leaving off 
 prating at all, lest 1 should lose this spirituality, and 
 this blessed thankfulness. I felt now quite willing 
 to live, and undergo all trials that might remain for 
 me in a world of sorrow; but still longed for heaven, 
 that 1 might glorify God in a perfect manner. 
 
 "14. I spent this day under a great degree of 
 bodily weakness and disorder. It pains me that I 
 live so much of my time for nothing. 1 long to do 
 much in little time, and if it might be the Lord s 
 will, to finish my work speedily in this tiresome 
 world. 1 am sure, 1 do not desire to live for any 
 thing in this tiresome world: and through grace I 
 am not afraid to look the king of terrors in the face; 
 I know 1 shall be afraid, if God leaves me; and 
 therefore I think it is always my duty to lay in for 
 that solemn hour. But for a considerable time, my 
 soul has rejoiced to think of death in its nearest ap 
 proaches; and even when I have been very weak 
 and seemed nearest eternity* *Not unto me, not unto 
 me, but to God be the glory. I feel tliat which 
 convinces me, that if God do not enable me to main 
 tain a holy dependence upon him, death will be a 
 terror, but at present I must say, <1 long to depart 
 and to be with Christ. When i am in a sweet re 
 signed frame of soul, I am willing to tarry in a 
 world of sorrow; 1 am willing to be from home as 
 long as God sees fit; but when J want the influence 
 of this temper, I then am apt to be impatient to be 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERB. %T 
 
 gone. Oli, when will the day appear, that I shall be 
 perfect in holiness! 
 
 "Feb. it. in the evening I was in the most sol 
 emn frame that I remember to have experienced: I 
 know not that ever death appeared more real to me$ 
 or that ever I saw myself in the condition of a dead 
 corpse laid out, and dressed for a lodging in the silent 
 grave so evidently as at this time: and yet 1 felt ex 
 ceedingly comfortable: my mind was composed and 
 calm, and death appeared without a sting. I never 
 felt such an universal mortification to all created ob 
 jects. Oh, how great and solemn a thing it appeared 
 to die! How it lays the greatest honor in the dust! 
 And how vain and trifling did the riches, honors, 
 and pleasures of the world appear! I could not, I 
 tlare not, so much as think of any of them: tor 
 death, death, (solemn, though not frightful) death, ap 
 peared at the door. I could not see myself laid out, 
 and inclosed in my coffin, and put down in the cold 
 grave, without terror! I spent the evening in convers 
 ing with a Christian friend; and it was a comforta 
 ble evening to us both. What are friends? What 
 are comforts? AVhat are sorrows? What are dis 
 tresses? The time is short, 4 it remains, that they 
 that weep be as though they wept not; and they 
 which rejoice, as though they rejoiced not: for the 
 fashion of this \vorld passeth away. O come, 
 Lord Jesus, come quickly! 
 
 "14 I spent the day in writing on a divine sub 
 ject: enjoyed health and freedom in my work: had 
 a solemn sense of death: as I have indeed every day 
 this week: what I felt on Monday last has been 
 abiding ever since. 
 
 "15. I had a sweet sense of the free grace of the 
 Gospel: my soul was encouraged, warmed, and 
 quickened; and my desires drawn out after God in 
 prayer: being afraid of losing so sweet a guest as I 
 then entertained. 1 longed "to proclaim the grace 
 I then meditated upon to the world of sinners. O 
 how quick and powerful is the word of the blessed 
 God! 
 
 *9 
 
$8 XIFE OF ERAINERD. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Feb. 17. I preached to the white 
 people (my interpreter being absent) in the wilder 
 ness; upon the sunny side of a hill: 1 had a consid 
 erable assembly, consisting of people that lived (at 
 least many of them) not less than thirty miles asun 
 der. 1 discoursed to them from John vii, 37; Jesus 
 stood arid cried, saying, if any man thirst, &c. In 
 the afternoon it pleased God to grant me great free 
 dom and fervency in my discourse; and I was ena 
 bled to imitate the example of Christ, who stood and 
 eried, I think I was scarce ever enabled to offer the 
 free grace of God to perishing sinners with more 
 freedom and plainness. O that I could for ever bless 
 God for the mercy of this day, who answered me in 
 the joy of my heart. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Feb. 24. My interpreter being ab 
 sent i knew not how to perform my work among the 
 Indians. However 1 rode to the Indians, and got a 
 Dutchman to interpret, though he was but poorly 
 qualified. Afterwards 1 came and preached to a 
 few white people, from John vi, 67. O the free 
 grace of Christ, that he seasonably minds his people 
 of their danger of backsliding, and invites them to 
 persevere in their adherence to himself! I saw that 
 backsliding souls might return and welcome to him 
 immediately without any thing to recommend them, 
 pot withstanding all their former backslid ings. And 
 I felt solemn and devout, resting on free grace for 
 assistance, acceptance, and peace of conscience." 
 
 During the three months in which he labored at 
 the Forks of Delaware, Mr. Brainerd received little 
 encouragement. No visible effects followed his min 
 istrations, and he seriously thought of quitting that 
 unfavorable station for a residence nearer the In 
 dians at Susquahannah river. This design he men 
 tioned to some friends, arid from them he received 
 flattering testimonies of their affection. This melt 
 ed his heart: it was surprising to his humble spirit, 
 that any human being could value a creature which 
 he thought to be so worthless. How sweet is the in 
 fluence of divine grace, and with what unaffected 
 
LFFE OF BKAINEHD. 59 
 
 simplicity does a real Christian manifest that he es 
 teems others better than himself. Humility, like the 
 violet, is a lovely flower; it grows low, has a dark 
 hue, but it diffuses the sweetest fragrance. Before 
 Mr. Brainerd executed his purpose, he resolved once 
 more to visit New England. He felt that his spirits 
 sunk under difficulties, to which no strength was 
 equal; and he imagined their weight would be imme 
 diately diminished could he obtain a companion who 
 would labor with him, who would aid his exertions, 
 mingle in his joys, and sympathize with him in his 
 sorrows. But he felt that thfe was one powerful 
 obstacle in the way, to prevent the gratification of 
 that which he so earnestly wished: that was, the 
 want of money: though powerful, he did not think 
 it insuperable, and he therefore prepared, on the 
 sixth of March, to undertake a journey for the pur 
 pose, as he expresses it, "of raising some money 
 among Christian friends, in order to support a col 
 league with me in the wilderness (I having now spent 
 two years in a very solitary manner,) that we might 
 be together, as Christ sent out his disciples, two 
 and two." For five weeks, he was indefatigably 
 employed in accomplishing this object. He first 
 went into various parts of New Jersey, then to New 
 York, from thence into New England, and then he 
 returned to New Jerse), arriving at home on April 
 13th. Scarcely had he been at the Forks of Dela 
 ware a week before he undertook another journey. 
 He went to Philadelphia, to engage the governor 
 thereto use his interest with the chief man of the six 
 nations(with whom he maintained a strict friendship,} 
 that he would give him leave to live at Susquahan- 
 nah, and instruct the Indians that are within their 
 territories.* On his return he entered in his diary 
 his experience. 
 
 * The Indians at Susquahannah are a mixed company of many na 
 tions, speaking various languages, and few of them properly of the 
 six nations. But yet, the country having formerl} been conquered by 
 the six nations, they claim the land; and the Susquahanuah Indians are 
 a kind of vassals to them. 
 
100 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 "Lord s-day, April 21. In the season of com- 
 munion I had comfortable apprehensions of the 
 blissful communion of God s people, when they shall 
 meet at their Father s tabta in his kingdom. In the 
 afternoon 1 preached abroad, from Rev, xiv, 4, 
 these are they that follow the Lamb/ &c. God was 
 pleased to give me great freedom an! clearness but 
 not so much warmth as before. However, there 
 was a most amazing attention in the whole assembly; 
 and, as I was informed afterwards, this was a sweet 
 season to many. 
 
 "25. I returned home to the Forks of Delaware; 
 enjoyed some sweet meditations on the road, and was 
 enabled to lift up my heart to God in prayer and 
 praise. 
 
 "26. I felt a spirit of mortification to the world 
 in a very great degree. Afterwards, I was enabled 
 to rely on God sweetly, for all things pertaining to 
 life and godliness. In the evening, I was visited by 
 a dear Christian friend, with whom I spent an hour 
 or two in conversation on the very soul of religion. 
 There are many with whom [ can talk about religion: 
 but alas! I find few with whom 1 can talk religion 
 itself: but, blessed be the Lord, there are some that 
 love to feed on the kernel, rather than the shell." 
 
 The next day he went to the Irish settlement, 
 about fifteen miles distant, where he spent the Sab 
 bath, and preached with some considerable assist 
 ance. On Monday he returned very weak to his 
 own lodgings. 
 
 "30. I was scarce able to walk about, and was 
 obliged to betake myself to the bed much of the 
 day, being neither able to read, meditate, nor pray, 
 and having none to converse with in this wilderness. 
 Oh, how heavily does time pass away when I can do 
 nothing to any good purpose? 
 
 "May 2. In the evening, being a little better in 
 health, I walked into the woods, and enjoyed a sweet 
 season of meditation and prayer. My thoughts 
 run upon Psalms xvii, 15, <l shall be satisfied when 
 I awake with thy likeness. And it was indeed a 
 
OF BRA1NERD. 101 
 
 precious text to me. I longed to preach to the 
 whole world; and it seemed to me they must needs 
 all he melted in hearing such precious truths as I had 
 then a view and relish of. Blessed he the Lord, 
 that, in my late and present weakness, my mind is 
 not gloomy as at some other times. 
 
 "7. I spent the day chiefly in making prepara 
 tion for a journey into the wilderness, i was still 
 weak, and concerned how I should pel-form so diffi 
 cult a journey. 1 spent some time in prayer for 
 the divine blessing; hut wanted bodily strength t9 
 spend the day in fasting and prayer." 
 
 Having made every necessary arrangement, lie 
 proceeded, on March the eighth, to glorify his Re 
 deemer, in carrying the Gospel to the outcast, and 
 those that were ready to perish, and began his sec 
 ond long and dismal journey to Susquahannab. 
 The hardships and dangers which his interpreter 
 and he encountered and escaped in the wilderness 
 are almost incredible. Once he was overtaken with 
 a north-easterly storm, and frequently he slept on the 
 cold ground without a covering: the consequence of 
 this was, an ague with extreme pains in the head and 
 bowels, and a great evacuation of blood. Wone but 
 such a spirit as Brairierd s could have persevered 
 amidst so many afflictions and trials, but he rose su 
 perior to them all. He preached wherever he had 
 an opportunity; no sense of danger could defer him 
 from discharging that which he felt to be an imperi 
 ous duty; and the performance of which was, in his 
 view, more than a compensation for all his discour 
 agements and distresses. On the thirtieth of May, 
 after having rode three hundred and forty miles, and 
 labored \\ith intense zeal, he came home weak and 
 emaciated, the mere shadow of a man. Yet, on the 
 seventh of the next month, he travelled another fifty 
 miles to assist at a sacramental occasion. As 
 soon as he returned, he began to meditate a visit to 
 a place called Croaweeksung, and on June the eigh 
 teenth he commenced his journey. Brainerd never 
 indulged his imagination with visionary schemes of 
 
LIFE OF BHAINEK1). 
 
 usefulness; never wasted his days in figuring to 
 himself what might be done, and what he w^ould ac 
 complish, at some future time: but his plans were al 
 ways formed to be executed, as soon as drawn they 
 were acted upon. When he began this journey, his 
 body was very feeble, his mind dark and harassed 
 with discouragement. He had preached and con 
 versed with a view to enlighten the poor savages, to 
 whom he de voted his labors almost every day, at 
 least he embraced every opportunity which presented 
 itself, without ever consulting his own ease or health; 
 and he had travelled on horseback, and on foot, some 
 thousands of miles, through the most dreary regions, 
 and in the most unfavorable weather, with scarcely 
 any prospect of success: yet he was not to be intim 
 idated; he was determined to labor while he had life; 
 to spend, and be spent, in his Master s work. He 
 knew nothing but Jesus Christ, and him crucified, 
 and when brought in competition with the excellency 
 of this knowledge, he counted all things but dung 
 and dross. What will not the love of Christ ac 
 complish! Animated by this heavenly principle, the 
 feeblest mortal will rise above mortality, and exhibit 
 miracles of fortitude, magnanimity, courage, and 
 perseverance. It is only this principle which can 
 reconcile the ministers and the missionaries of the 
 cross to incessant disappointment, and which will 
 lead them to derive from disappointment itself new 
 motives for unwearied and increased exertions. 
 The Savior well knew the difficulties which the 
 apostle Peter must encounter in fulfilling his apos 
 tolic mission; and before he sent him forth, he asked, 
 "Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me?" And unless 
 Brainerd could have answered this question aright, 
 tie would soon have abandoned a station, and an em 
 ployment, which promised him nothing but poverty, 
 hardships, and an untimely grave. But the love of 
 Christ constrained him; and notwithstanding he had, 
 for two years, almost labored in vain, compassion for 
 perishing souls, a portion of that divine affection 
 which led Jesus Christ to the accursed tree, and 
 
LIFE OF BRJLltfERD. 105 
 
 which would not suffer him to come down from the 
 cross, made him resolve, though standing on the shore 
 of a sea of dangers, "to go forward." 
 
 CHAPTER VII. 
 
 t,\Tr. Brainerd s reception at Croswecksung. His 
 preaching. His journies. His amazing success. 
 Jin abridgment of his journal, and extracts from 
 his private diary. His illuess 9 and return from 
 his last journey to Susquahannah. 
 
 IN the book of human life, there are generally a few 
 bright pages: and it is now the pleasing task of the 
 biographer of Brainerd, to record events the most 
 delightful and satisfactory. Hitlterto, we have seen 
 him the pious missionary, going forth weeping, 
 bearing precious seed. But now, the smile of joy 
 lightens up his countenance, the days of his mourn 
 ing are ended, and his reception and success at Cros- 
 weeksung, abundantly prove, that the conversion of 
 untutored, uncivilized men to Christianity, by the 
 simple means of preaching, is not an impossible, nor 
 a wild and imaginary thing. The Gospel, among 
 bond and free, the civilized and barbarous, when ac 
 companied with the Holy Ghost sent down from 
 heaven, is the power of God unto salvation. The 
 sons of worldly wisdom, who take only a superficial 
 glance of the subject, who judge of Christianity as a 
 mere human system, exclaim, "civilize, before you 
 attempt to evangelize." But from the success of 
 Brainerd among the American savages it appears, 
 that instruction in the Christian religion is the best 
 and most effectual means of civilization: and as to 
 the difficulties of teaching this religion to barbarians, 
 it was found equally difficult to teach it to polished 
 Athens, and learned Rome. Christ was crucified by 
 a civilized people, and so were his apostles and first 
 evangelists. Divine influence is, at all times, and in 
 
104 LIFE OF BRAIKERD. 
 
 all circumstances, absolutely necessary to render 
 the preaching of the Gospel successful in the conver 
 sion of souls; and if this be withheld, whether in 
 Britain, or in Africa, the carnal mind, savage or 
 civilized, will be enmity against God. Like Paul, 
 the missionaries and ministers of Christ "are debt 
 ors to the Greeks, and to the barbarians; both to the 
 wise and to the unwise." And while this command 
 and promise stand on record, "Go ye forth, and 
 preach the Gospel to every creature; and lo 1 am 
 with you always, even unto the end of the world; * 
 the outward circumstances of men can never abro 
 gate a law which provides against every discourage 
 ment. Duty is plain, and difficulties should not be 
 considered: they must smooth themselves away 
 before the agency of the Holy Spirit; and missiona 
 ries should not tremble at the prospect of w hat they 
 conceive to be insurmountable barriers, for 
 
 "He can add wings when he commands to fly." 
 
 The crying sin of Christians in ages that are past, 
 has been that they have conferred with flesh and 
 blood, and staggered at the promise of God through 
 unbelief; and it will be well if the blood of souls be 
 not required at our hands: "Deliver thy servants 
 from blood guiltiness, O Lord." 
 
 When Mr. Brainerd arrived at Crosweeksung, he 
 found but few persons, and perceived that the Indians 
 in those parts were very much scattered, there being 
 not more than two or three families in a place; and 
 these small settlements, six, ten. fifteen, twenty, and 
 thirty miles from the spot which he had chosen, on 
 which to commence his labors. To those few, how 
 ever, who were there at the time, he preached; they 
 appeared well disposed, and when he informed them 
 that he was willing to preach to them again the next 
 day; the women (for he had no male hearers,) like 
 the woman of Samaria, seemed desirous that others 
 might see the man that told them what they had done 
 in their lives past, and the misery that attended their 
 idolatrous ways; and they readily set out, and trav- 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 105 
 
 elled ten or fifteen miles, in order to give notice to 
 some of their Mends at that distance. It will be 
 interesting to furnish the reader, at one view, with 
 his private experience and public labors and success. 
 I shall, therefore, present them in connected rela 
 tion, blending the most important parts of his diary 
 and journal, and interspersing, now and then, a few 
 lines to give information respecting his removals 
 from place to place. 
 
 "June 20. Towards night, I preached to the In 
 dians again; and had more hearers than before. In 
 the evening 1 enjoyed peace and serenity of mind, 
 composure and comfort in prayer: and was enabled 
 to lift up my head, with joy, under an apprehension 
 that my redemption draws nigh. Oh, blessed be 
 God, that there remains a rest to his poor weary 
 people. 
 
 "21. I was refreshed in secret prayer; but saw 
 myself a poor worthless creature, without wisdom to 
 direct, or strength to help myself. Blessed be God, 
 that lays me under a happy necessity of living upon 
 himself! 
 
 "22. About noon, I rode to the Indians againj 
 and near night preached to about thirty of them. I 
 found my body much strengthened, and was enabled 
 to speak with abundant plainness and warmth. And 
 the power of God evidently attended the word; so 
 that sundry persons were brought under great con 
 cern for their souls, and made to shed many tears, 
 and to wish for Christ to save them. My soul was 
 much refreshed, and quickened in my work; and I 
 could not but spend much time with them, in order to 
 open both their misery and remedy. While riding, 
 before I came to the Indians, I was enabled to cry to 
 God almost incessantly. In the evening also I found 
 the consolations of God were not small: I was then 
 willing to live, and in some respects desirous of it, 
 that I might do something for the kingdom of Christ; 
 and yet death appeared pleasant: so that I was in a 
 strait between two. I am often weary of this world 
 10 
 
106 !LIFE 01? BRAINERB. 
 
 but it is desirable to be drawn, rather than driven out 
 ofit. 
 
 "Lord s-day, June 23. I preached to the Indians, 
 and spent the day with them. Their number still 
 increased; and all with one consent seemed to re 
 joice in my coming among them. JNot a word of op 
 position was heard from any, although in times past 
 they had been quite opposite to any thing of that na 
 ture. 
 
 24. I preached to the Indians at their desire, 
 and upon their own motion. To see poor Pagans 
 desirous of hearing the Gospel of Christ, animated 
 me to discourse with them, although 1 was very weak, 
 and my spirits much exhausted. They attended 
 with the greatest seriousness and diligence; and 
 there was some concern apparent among them. 
 
 27. I preached to the Indians again. Their 
 number now amounted to about/or^ persons. Their 
 solemnity and attention still continued: and a con 
 siderable concern for their souls became very appar 
 ent among sundry of them. 
 
 *28. The Indians being now gathered a consider 
 able number of them, from their several distant hab 
 itations^ requested me to preach twice a day to them, 
 being desirous to hear as much as they could while I 
 was with them. I cheerfully complied, and could not 
 but admire the goodness of God, who had inclined 
 them to inquire after the way of salvation. 
 
 "I preached twice to the Indians: arid could not 
 but wonder at their seriousness, and the strictness of 
 their attention. Blessed be God that he has inclined 
 their hearts to hear. And O how refreshing it is to 
 me, to see them attend with such uncommon diligence 
 and affection. 
 
 "I likewise saw the hand of God making provision 
 for their subsistence together,in order to their being 
 instructed. For this day and the day before, with 
 only walking a little way from the place of our daily 
 meeting, they killed three deer, which were a season 
 able supply for their wants, and without which they 
 
JLIFE OF BRAINEUD, 107 
 
 could not have subsisted together in order to attend 
 the means of grace. 
 
 "LordVday, June SO. I preached twice this day 
 also and observed more concern and affection among 
 the poor Heathens than ever; so that they even con 
 strained me to tarry longer vviih them; although my 
 constitution was exceedingly worn out, and my health 
 much impaired by the late fatigues and labors, 
 and especially by my late journey to Susquahannah. 
 
 "July 1. I preached twice to a very serious and 
 attentive assembly, who had now learned to attend 
 the worship of God with Christian decency. 
 
 "There were now between forty and fifty persons 
 of them present, old and young. 
 
 "i spent some lime in discoursing with them in 
 private, inquiring what they remembered of the 
 great truths that had been taught them. It was 
 amazing to see how they had received and retained 
 the instructions given them, and what a measure of 
 knowledge some of them had acquired in a few days. 
 
 "2. 1 was obliged to leave these Indians at Cros- 
 weeksung, thinking it my duty, as soon as health 
 would admit, to visit those at the Forks of Delaware.. 
 When 1 came to take leave of them, they all earnest 
 ly inquired when I would come again, and expressed 
 a great desire of being farther instructed: and of 
 their own accord agreed, that when 1 should come 
 again, they would all meet and live together during 
 my continuance with them; and that they would do 
 their utmost endeavors to gather all the other In 
 dians in those parts that were farther remote. And 
 when I parted, one told me, with many tears, l she 
 wish! God would change her heart: another that <she 
 wanted to find Christ: and anoldman ( thathadbeenono 
 of their chiefs, wept bitterly. 1 then promised them 
 to return as speedily as my health, and business else 
 where would admit, and felt not a little concerned at 
 parting, lest good impressions, then apparent upon 
 them, might wear off. 
 
 "Afterwards I rode to Brunswick, near forty 
 miles, and lodged there. I felt my heart drawn ont 
 
108 XIFE OF BRAINEKD. 
 
 after God in prayer, almost all the afternoon. Ami 
 in the evening, could not help crying to God for 
 these poor Indians; and after 1 went to bed, my 
 heart continued to go out to God for them, until I 
 dropped asleep." 
 
 He was now so worn out by constant preaching, 
 that he found it necessary to give himself some re 
 laxation. He spent therefore about a week in New 
 Jersey, visiting several ministers, and performing 
 some necessary business. And though he was very 
 weak in body, yet he seems to have heen strong in 
 spirit. On July 12, he arrived at his own house in 
 the Forks of Delaware; continuing still frue from 
 melancholy; and from day to day enjoyed freedom 
 and refreshment. 
 
 "Lord s-day, July 14. I discoursed to the Indians 
 twice, several of whom appeared convinced of their 
 sin and misery: so that they wept much the whole 
 time of divine service. Afterwards I discoursed to 
 a number of white people then present. 
 
 "18. 1 longed to spend the little inch of time I 
 have in the world for God. Felt a spirit of serious 
 ness, tenderness, and devotion; and wished to spend 
 the whole night in prayer and communion with God. 
 
 "19. In the evening I walked abroad for prayer 
 and meditation: and enjo)ed composure and freedom 
 in these sweet exercises; especially in meditation on 
 Rev. iii, 12, Him that overcome!!), will I make a pil 
 lar in the temple of my God, c. This was a de 
 lightful theme. Oh, when shall I go no more ont 
 from the service arid enjoyment of my dear Lord, 
 Lord, hasten the blessed day. 
 
 "Lord s day, 21. I preached to the Indians first 
 then to a number of white people, and in the after 
 noon to the Indians again. Divine truths seemed to 
 make very considerable impressions upon several o 
 them, and caused the tears to flow 7 freely. 
 
 "Afterwards I baptized my interpreter and his tvije, 
 who were the first 1 baptised among the Indians. 
 
 "They are both persons of some experimental 
 knowledge in religion; have both been awakened U> 
 
LIFE 01? BRAINEUD, 109 
 
 a solemn concern for their souls, and brought to a 
 sense of their misery and undoncness: and have both 
 been comforted with divine consolations. 
 
 "It may perhaps he satisfactory that I should give 
 some relation of iny interpreter s experience since he 
 lias been with me. 
 
 "When 1 first employed him in the beginning of 
 summer, 1744, he was well fitted for his work in re 
 gard of his acquaintance with the Indian and En 
 glish language; and in regard of his desire that the 
 Indians should conform to the customs and manners 
 of the English. But he seemed to have no impres 
 sion of religion, and in that respect was very uiifit 
 for his work, being incapable of understanding and 
 communicating to others many tilings of importance; 
 so that I labored under great disadvantages in ad 
 dressing the Indians, for want of his having an ex 
 perimental acquaintance with divine truths; and at 
 times I was much discouraged, when I observed that 
 divine truths made little or no impression upon him 
 for many weeks together. 
 
 Hc indeed behaved soberly (although before he 
 had been a hard drinker,} and seemed honestly en 
 gaged as far as he was capable in the performance 
 of his work, and especially he was very desirous that 
 the Indians should conform to the customs of the 
 Christian world. But still seemed to have no con 
 cern about his own soul. 
 
 "Near the latter end of July, 1744, 1 preached to 
 an assembly of white people, with freedom and fer 
 vency: at which time he was present, and somewhat 
 awakened; so that the next day he discoursed freely 
 with me about his spiritual concerns, and gave me an 
 opportunity to use farther endeavors to fasten the 
 impressions upon his mind; I could indeed plainly 
 perceive after this, that he addressed the Indians 
 with more concern and fervency. 
 
 "But these impressions seemed to decline, until iu 
 the fall of the year following he fell into a weak state 
 of body. At this season divine truth took hold of 
 him, and made deep impressions upon his mind. lie 
 
110 LIFE OF BRAINEBD. 
 
 was brought under great concern for his soul, and 
 was burdened from day to day. His trouble prevail 
 ed, until at length his sleep departed from him, and 
 he had little rest day or night; but walked about 
 under great pressure of mind, and appeared like 
 another man to his neighbors, who could not but ob 
 serve his behavior with wonder. 
 
 "After he had been sometime striving for mercy 
 he saye, there seemed to be an impassable mountain 
 before him. He was pressing towards heaven, but 
 his way was hedged up with thorns, that he could not 
 stir an inch farther. He looked this way and that 
 way, but could find no way at all. He felt, 4 It signi 
 fied just nothing at all to strive and struggle 
 any more. And here, he says, he gave over striving, 
 and felt that it was a gone case with him, as to his 
 own power, foul all his attempts were, and forever 
 would be, vain and fruitless. 
 
 "He knew, he said, he W 7 as not guilty of some 
 wicked actions as others were guilty of. He had 
 not been used to steal, quarrel, and murder; the lat 
 ter of which is common among the Indians. He like 
 wise knew that he had done many things that were 
 right. But still his cry was, that he had never done 
 one good thing* (meaning that he had never done 
 any thing from a right principle, arid with a right 
 view, though he had done many things that were 
 materially good.) And now I thought said he, that I 
 must sink down to hell, that there was no hope for 
 me, because I never could do any thing that was 
 good; and if God let me alone never so long, and I 
 should try never so much, still 1 should do nothing 
 but what is bad. 
 
 "There was one thing more in his view of things 
 that was very remarkable. He not only saw what a 
 miserable state he himself was in, but he saw the 
 world around him w r ere in the same perishing circum 
 stances. And this he saw clearly, <as if he now 
 awaked out of sleep, or had a cloud taken from before 
 his eyes. He saw that the life he had lived was the 
 way to eternal death, that he was now on the brink 
 
OF BRAIKEHB. Ill 
 
 ef endless misery: and when he looked around he 
 saw multitudes of others who had lived the same 
 life with himself, had no more goodness than he, and 
 yet dreamed that they were sate enough, as he had 
 formerly done. 
 
 "After he had been for some time in this condition, 
 sensible of the impossibility of helping himself; then 
 he says, it was borne in upon his mind as if it had 
 been audibly spoken, there is hope, there is hope. 
 Whereupon his soul seemed to rest arid be in some 
 measure satisfied, though he had no considerable joy: 
 neither can he remember distinctly any views he had 
 of Christ, or give any clear account of his accept 
 ance through him. 
 
 "But these exercises of soul were followed by a 
 great change, so that it might justly he said, he was 
 become another man. He was much altered, and 
 even the world could not but admire what had befal 
 len him to make so great a change in his temper, 
 discourse, and behavior. 
 
 "And especially there was a surprising alteration 
 in his public performances. He now addressed the 
 Indians with admirable fervency, and scarce knew 
 when to leave off: and sometimes when 1 had con 
 cluded my discourse, and was returning homeward, 
 he would tarry behind to repeat and inculcate what 
 had been spoken, 
 
 "His change is abiding, and his life unblemished to 
 this day, though it is now more titan six months since 
 he experienced it; in which space he has been as 
 much exposed to strong drink as possible, in divers 
 places; and yet has never discovered any desire 
 after it. 
 
 "He seems to have a very considerable experience 
 of spiritual exercise and discourses feelingly of the 
 conflicts and consolations of a real Christian. His 
 heart echoes to the soul humbling doctrines of grace, 
 and he never appears better pleased than when he 
 hears of the absolute sovereignty of God, and the 
 salvation of sinners JM a way of mere free grace. He 
 has likewise of late had more satisfaction respecting 
 
112 ilEE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 his own state, has been much enlivened and assisted 
 in his work, so that lie has heen a great comfort to 
 me. 
 
 "And upon strict observation of his Christian tem 
 per, and unblemished behavior for so considerable a 
 time, I think I have reason to hope that he is <cre- 
 ated anew in Christ Jesus to good works. 
 
 "His name is Moses Tinda Tautamy; he is about 
 fifty years of age, and pretty well acquainted witli 
 the notions and customs of his countrymen, and so 
 is the better able to expose them. He has already 
 been, and 1 trust will yet be a blessing to other In 
 dians. 
 
 "July 26. In the evening, God was pleased to help 
 me in prayer beyond what I have experienced for 
 some time; especially for the enlargement of Christ s 
 kingdom, and for the conversion of my poor people: 
 my soul relied on God for the accomplishment of 
 that great work. Oh, how sweet were the thoughts 
 of death to me at this time! How 1 longed to be 
 \vith Christ, to be employed in the glorious work of 
 angels, and with an angel s freedom, vigor, and de 
 light! And yet how willing was I to stay awhile on 
 earth, that 1 might do something, if the Lord pleased, 
 for his interest. My soul longed for the in-gathering 
 of the poor heathen: and I cried to God for them 
 most willingly and heartily. This was a sweet sea 
 son; 1 had a lively taste of heaven, and a temper 
 suited in some measure to the entertainments of it. 
 My soul was grieved to leave the place; but my body 
 was weak and worn out. I longed that the remain 
 ing part of my life might be filled up with more fer 
 vency and activity in the things of God. Oh the 
 inward peace, composure, and god- like serenity of 
 such a frame! Heaven must needs differ from this 
 only in degree, and not in kind. 
 
 "LordVday, July 28. 1 preached again, and per 
 ceived my people more thoughtful than ever. I was 
 told by some, that seeing my interpreter and Is vufe 
 baptized, made them more concerned than any thing 
 they had ever seen or heard. There was indeed a 
 
OF ERAIWERD. * 113 
 
 considerable appearance of divine power among them 
 at the time that ordinance was administered. 
 
 "July 30. I discoursed to a number of my people 
 and gave them particular advice and direction, being 
 now about to leave them for the present, in order to 
 renew my visit to the Indians at New Jersey. They 
 were very attentive, and earnestly desirous to know 
 when I designed to return." 
 
 On July 31, he set out on his return to Crosweek- 
 sung, and arrived there the next day. In his way 
 he had longing desires that he might come to the In 
 dians in the fulness of the blessing of the Gospel of 
 Christ; attended with a sense of his own great weak 
 ness, dependance, and worthlessness. 
 
 "August 2. In the evening 1 retired, and my soul 
 was drawn out in prayer to God; especially for my 
 poor people, to whom I had sent word to gather to 
 gether, that I might preach to them the next day. I 
 was much enlarged in praying for their conversion; 
 and scarce ever found my desires of any thing of 
 this nature so sensibly and clearly, and free from 
 selfish views. I had no desire to be the instrument 
 of so glories* Irork as I prayed for among the In 
 dians; if the blessed work might be accomplished to 
 the honor of God, and the enlargement of the (leap 
 Redeemer s kingdom, this was all my desire and 
 care; and for this merry I hoped, but with trembling. 
 My rising hopes, respecting the conversion of the 
 Indians, have been often dashed, that my spirit is as 
 it were broken, and I hardly dare hope. 
 
 "8. I now found them serious, and a number of 
 them under deep concern for an interest in Christ: 
 their convictions of their sinful and perishing state 
 having, in my absence, been much promoted by the 
 labors of the Rev. William Tennent, to whom I had 
 advised them to apply, and whose house they had 
 frequented much: I preached to them this day on 
 Rev. xxii, 17, And whosoever will, let him take the 
 water of life freely. 
 
 "I was enabled to set before them the Lord Jesus 
 Christ as a kind and compassionate Savior, inviting 
 
114- LIFE OF ERAINERD. 
 
 distressed and perishing sinners to accept everlast 
 ing mercy. A surprising concern soon appeared 
 among them. There were about twenty adult per 
 sons together (many of the Indians at remote places, 
 not having, as yet, had time to come since my re 
 turn,) and not above two that I could see with dry 
 eyes. Some discovered vehement longings after 
 Christ, to save them from the misery they felt and 
 feared. 
 
 "Lord s-day, August 4. Being invited by a neigh 
 boring minister to assist in the administration of the 
 Lord s supper, I complied with his request, and took 
 the Indians along with me; not only those that were 
 together the day before, but many more that were 
 coming to hear me: so that there were near fifty in 
 all. 
 
 "They attend the several discourses of the day; 
 some of them were much affected, and all seemed to 
 have their concern raised. 
 
 "Now a change in their manners began to appear. 
 In the evening, when they came to sup together, they 
 would not taste a morsel till they had sent to me to 
 come and ask a blessing on their foodj at which time 
 sundry of them wept, especially when I reminded 
 them how they had, in times past, eat their feasts in 
 honor to devils, and neglected to thank God for them. 
 
 "5. Alter a sermon had been preached by another 
 minister, I preached, and concluded the public work 
 of the solemnity, from John vii, 37. In my discourse 
 I addressed the Indians in particular, who eat by 
 themselves in a part of the house; at which time one 
 or two of them were struck with deep concern who 
 had been little affected before; others had their con 
 cern increased to a considerable degree. In the 
 evening I discoursed to them, and found them uni 
 versally engaged, inquiring, what they should do to 
 be saved? And all their conversation among them 
 selves turned upon religious matters, in which they 
 \\ere much assisted by my interpreter, who was \\ith 
 them day and night. 
 
TLIFE OF BRAIKERB. 115 
 
 "This day there was one woman that had been 
 much concerned ever since she heard me preach in 
 June, who obtained comfort, I trust, solid and well 
 grounded: she seemed to be filled with love to Christ: 
 at the same time she behaved humbly and tenderly, 
 and appeared afraid of nothing so much as grieving 
 him whom her soul loved. 
 
 6. In the morning I discoursed to the Indians at 
 the house where we lodged; many of them were then 
 much affected, so that a few words about their souls 
 would cause the tears to flow freely, and produce 
 many sobs and groans. 
 
 "In the afternoon they being returned to the place 
 where I have usually preached among them,! again 
 discoursed to them there. There were about fifty- 
 five persons in all, about forty that were capable of 
 attending divine service with understanding: I insist 
 ed upon 1 John iv, 10, Herein is love. &c. They 
 seemed eager of hearing; but there appeared nothing 
 very remarkable till near the close of my discourse, 
 and then divine truths were attended with a surpris 
 ing influence. There was scarce three in forty that 
 Gould refrain from tears and bitter cries. They all 
 as one seemed in an agony of soul to obtain an in 
 terest in Christ; and the more I discoursed of the 
 love and compassion of God, in sending his Son to 
 suffer for the sins of men; and the more 1 invited 
 them to come and partake of his love, the more their 
 distress was aggravated. 
 
 "It was surprising to see how their hearts were 
 pierced with the tender invitations of the Gospel 
 when there was not a word of terror spoken to them. 
 
 "There was this day two persons that obtained 
 comfort, which (when 1 came to discourse with them) 
 appeared solid, rational, and scriptural. After I had 
 inquired into the grounds of their comfort, I asked 
 what they wanted God to do further for them? They 
 replied, they wanted Christ should wipe their hearts 
 quite clean. 
 
 "7. I preached to the Indians from Isaiah liii, 3, 
 10. There was a remarkable influence attending 
 
116 !LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 the word. Most were much affected, and many in 
 great distress; and some could neither go nor stand, 
 but lay flat on the ground, as if pierced at heart, cry 
 ing incessantly for mercy; several were newly 
 awakened, and it was remarkable, that as fast as they 
 came from remote places round about, the Spirit of 
 God seemed to seize them. 
 
 "After public service I found two persons more 
 that had newly met with comfort, of whom I had 
 good hopes; and a third that I could not but enter 
 tain some hopes of, so that here were now six in all, 
 that had got some relief from their spiritual distres 
 ses, and live whose experience appeared clear and 
 satisfactory. 
 
 "8. in the afternoon I preached to the Indians, 
 their number was now about sixty-five persons, men, 
 women, and children, i discoursed from Luke xiv, 
 16 23, and was favored with uncommon freedom. 
 
 "There was much concern among them while I 
 was discoursing publicly; but afterwards, when I 
 spoke to one and another more particularly, whom I 
 perceived under concern, the power of God seemed 
 to descend upon the assembly, "-Like a rushing 
 mighty wind, and with an astonishing energy bore 
 down all before it. 
 
 "I stood amazed at the influence that seized the 
 audience almost universally, and could compare it to 
 nothing more aptly than a mighty torrent, that bears 
 down and sweeps before it whatever is in its way. 
 Almost all persons of all ages, were bowed down, 
 together, and scarce one w; s able to withstand the 
 shock of this surprising operation. Old men and 
 women, who had been drunken wretches for many 
 years, and some little children, not more than six or 
 seven years of age, appeared in distress for their 
 souls, as well as persons of middle age. Arid it was 
 apparent these children were not merely frighted with 
 seeing the general concern, but were made sensible 
 of their danger, the badness of their hearts, and their 
 misery without Christ. The most stubborn hearts 
 were now obliged to bow. A principal man among 
 
LIFE OF BKAINERD. ll? 
 
 the Indians, who before thought his state good, be" 
 cause he knew more than the generality of Indians, 
 and who with great confidence the day before, told me, 
 he had been a Christian more than ten years, was 
 now brought under solemn concern for his soul, and 
 wept bitterly. Another man, considerable in years, 
 who had been a murderer, a pawtvaiv, and a notori 
 ous drunkard^ was likewise brought now to cry for 
 mercy with many tears, and to complain much that 
 he could be no more concerned when he saw his dan 
 ger so great. 
 
 "There were almost universally praying and cry 
 ing for mercy in every part of the house, and many 
 out of doors, and numbers could neither go nor stand; 
 their concern was so great, each for himself, that 
 none seemed to take any notice of those about them, 
 but each prayed for themselves; and were, to their 
 own apprehension, as much retired as if every one 
 had been by himself in a desert, or, rather, they 
 thought nothing about any but themselves, and so 
 were every one praying apart, although all together. 
 
 "It seemed to me there was an exact fulfilment of 
 that prophecy, Zech. xii,10, 1 1, 12, for there was now 
 <a great mourning, like the mourning of Hadadrirn- 
 mon; and each seemed to mourn apart. Me- 
 thought this had a near resemblance to the day of 
 God s power, mentioned Josh, x, 14, for I must say, I 
 never saw any day like it in all respects; it was a day 
 wherein the Lord did much destroy the kingdom of 
 darkness among this people. 
 
 "This concern was most rational and just: those 
 who had been awakened any considerable time, com 
 plained especially of the badness of their hearts; 
 those newly awakened, of the badness of their lives 
 .and actions; and all were afraid of the anger of God; 
 arid of everlasting misery as the desert of their sins. 
 
 "Some of the white people, who came out of curi 
 osity to hear what this babbler would say, to the 
 poor ignorant Indians, were much awakened, and 
 appeared to be wounded with a view of their perish 
 ing state. 
 
 11 
 
118 LIFE OF URAINERD. 
 
 "Those who had lately obtained relief, were filled 
 with comfort; they appeared calm, and rejoiced in 
 Christ Jesus; and some of them took their distressed 
 friends by the hand, telling them of the goodness of 
 Christ, and the comfort that is to be enjoyed in him, 
 and invited them to come and give up their hearts to 
 him. And I could observe some of them, in the most 
 unaffected manner, lifting up their eyes, to heaven, 
 as if crying for mercy, while they saw the distress of 
 the poor souls around them. 
 
 "There was one remarkable instance this day, 
 that I cannot but take particular notice of. A young 
 Indian woman, who I believe, never knew before she 
 had a soul, hearing that there was something strange 
 among the Indians, came to see what was the matter. 
 I had not proceeded far in my discourse, before she 
 felt effectually that she had a soul; and before I had 
 concluded, was so convinced of her sin and misery, 
 and so distressed with concern for her soul, that she 
 seemed like one pierced through with a dart, and 
 cried out incessantly. She could neither go nor stand, 
 nor sit on her seat without being held up. After 
 public service was over, she lay flat on the ground 
 praying earnestly, and would take no notice of, nor 
 give any answer to any one -that spoke to her. I 
 hearkened to hear what she said, and perceived the 
 burden of her prayer to be guttummaukalummeh we- 
 chaumeh kmelch Ndah i. e. have mercy on me, 
 and help me to give you my heart. And thus she 
 continued praying incessantly for many hours. 
 
 "August 9. 1 spent almost the whole day with 
 the Indians, the former part of it in discoursing with 
 them privately, especially, some who lately received 
 comfort, and endeavoring to inquire into the grounds 
 of it, as well as to give them some proper instruc 
 tions, cautions, and directions. 
 
 "in the afternoon I discoursed to them publicly. 
 There were now present about seventy persons. I 
 opened and applied the parable of the sower, and was 
 enabled to discourse with much plainness. There 
 wore many tears among them while I was discours- 
 
LIFE OF BIIAINERD. 119 
 
 ing, but no considerable cry: yet some were much 
 affected with a few words spoken from Matt, xi, 28, 
 with which I concluded. But while I was discours 
 ing near night to two or three of the awakened per 
 sons, a divine influence seemed to attend what was 
 spoken, which caused the persons to cry out in an 
 guish of soul, although i spoke not a word of terror: 
 but, on the contrary, set before them the fulness of 
 Christ s merits, and his willingness to save all that 
 came to him. 
 
 "The cry of these was beard by others, who, 
 though scattered before, immediately gathered round. 
 I then proceeded in the same strain of gospel invi 
 tation, till they were all melted into tears and cries, 
 except two or three; and seemed in the greatest dis 
 tress to find and secure an interest in the great Re 
 deemer. Some who had but little more than a ruffle 
 made in their passions the day before, seemed now to 
 be deeply affected, and the concern in general ap 
 peared near as prevalent as the day before. There 
 was indeed a very great mourning among them, and 
 yet every one seemed to mourn apart. For so great 
 was their concern, that almost every one was praying 
 and crying for himself, as if none had been near. 
 Gnttummankalummeh, guttuinmaukalumineh 9 i. e. 
 Have mercy upon me, have mercy upon me; was 
 the common cry. 
 
 "It was very affecting to sec the poor Indians, who 
 the other day were yelling in their idolatrous feasts, 
 isow crying to God with such importunity, for an 
 interest in his dear Sou! 
 
 U I found two or three who, I hope, bad taken 
 comfort upon good grounds since the evening before: 
 and these with others that had obtained comfort 
 were together, and seemed to rejoice much that God 
 was carrying on his work with such power upon 
 others. 
 
 "August 10. I began to discourse privately with 
 those who .had obtained comfort; endeavoring to 
 instruct, direct, caution, and comfort them. But 
 others being eager of hearing every word that relat- 
 
]0 EIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 ed to spiritual concerns, soon came together one after 
 another: and when I had discoursed to the young con 
 verts more than halt an hour, they seemed much 
 melted with divine things, and earnestly desirous to 
 be with Christ. 
 
 "When I had spent some time with these, I turned 
 to the other Indians, and spoke to them from Luke 
 xix, 10. I had not discoursed long hefore their 
 concern rose to a great degree, and the house was 
 filled with cries and groans. And when 1 insisted on 
 the compassion and care of the Lord Jesus Christ 
 for those that "were lost and could find no way of es 
 cape, this melted them down the more, and aggra 
 vated their distress, that they could not come to so 
 kind a Savior. 
 
 "Sundry persons, who before had been but slightly 
 awakened, were now deeply wounded. And one 
 man in particular, W ho was never before awakened, 
 was now made to feel that the word of the Lord was 
 quick and powerful, sharper than any two edged 
 sword. He seemed to be pierced to the heart and 
 said, all the wickedness of his past life was brought 
 fresh to his remembrance, and he saw all the vile ac 
 tions be bad done formerly, as if done but yesterday. 
 
 44 1 found one that had newly received comfort, 
 after pressing distress from day to day. I could not 
 but admire the divine goodness. There seemed to he 
 some good done by every discourse; some newly 
 awakened every day, and some comforted. 
 
 "Lord s-day, August 11. 1 discoursed in the fore 
 noon from the parable of the prodigal son. 
 
 In the afternoon I discoursed upon part of St. 
 Peter s sermon, Acts ii, and at the close of my dis 
 course to the Indians, made an address to the while 
 people, and divine truths seemed to be attended with 
 power both to the English and Indians. Several of 
 the white heathen were awakened, and could no 
 longer be idle spectators, but found they had souls to 
 save as well as the Indians, and a great concern 
 spread through the whole assembly, so that this also 
 appeared to be a day of God s power. 
 
XIPE OF BBA1NE11D. 121 
 
 Tlic number of Indians, old and young, was now 
 upwards of seventy, and one or two were newly 
 awakened this day, who never appeared to be moved 
 before. 
 
 "Those that had obtained comfort, and had given 
 evidences of a saving change, appeared humble and 
 devout, and behaved in an agreeable and Christian 
 manner. I was refreshed to see the tenderness of 
 conscience manifest in some of them. Perceiving 
 one of them very sorrowful in the morning, 1 in 
 quired into the cause of her sorrow, and found she 
 had been angry with her child the evening before, and 
 was in fear lest her anger had been inordinate, which 
 so grieved her, that she awaked and began to sob 
 before day-light, and continued weeping for several 
 hours together. 
 
 "August 14. I spent the day with the Indians. 
 There Xvas one of them who had some time since put 
 away his wife (as is common among them,) and 
 taken another woman, and being now brought under 
 some serious impressions, was earnestly desirous to 
 know what God would have him to do. When the 
 law of God respecting marriage had been opened to 
 them, and the cause of his leaving his wife inquired 
 into; and when it appeared she hud given him no 
 just occasion by unchastity to desert her, and that 
 she was willing to forgive his past misconduct, he 
 was then told that it was his indispensable duty to 
 renounce the woman he had last taken, and receive 
 the other who was his proper wife, with which he 
 cheerfully complied, and thereupon publicly rc-n Min 
 ced the woman he had last taken, and publicly 
 promised to live with his wife during life. Ami 
 there appeared a clear demonstration of the power 
 of God s word upon their hearts. A. few weeks be 
 fore, the whole world could not have persuaded him 
 to a compliance with Christian rules in this affair. 
 
 "August 15. I preached from Luke iv, 16. The 
 word was attended with power upon the hearts of the 
 hearers. There was much concern, many tears, and 
 affecting cries among them, and some were deeply 
 
LIFE OF BRAINE11D. 
 
 wounded and distressed. There were some newly 
 awakened, who came but this week, and convictions 
 seemed to be promoted in others. Those that had 
 received comfort, were likewise refreshed and 
 strengthened, and the work of grace appeared to ad 
 vance in all respects. 
 
 "16. I spent a considerable time in conversing 
 privately with sundry of the Indians. 1 found one 
 that had got comfort, after pressing concern, and 
 could not but hope, when I discoursed with her that 
 her comfort was of the right kind. 
 
 "In the afternoon I preached from John vi, 26, 
 34. Toward the close of my discourse, divine 
 truths were attended with considerable power upon 
 the audience, and more especially after public ser 
 vice was over, when I particularly addressed the dis 
 tressed persons. 
 
 "There was a great concern for their souls spread 
 generally among them; but especially there were 
 two persons newly awakened to a sense of their sin, 
 and misery, one of whom was lately come, and the 
 other had all along been very attentive, and desirous 
 of being awakened, but could never before have any 
 !ively view of her perishing state. But now her 
 spiritual distress was such, that I had never seen any 
 more pressing. Sundry old men were also in dis 
 tress for their souls; so that they could not refrain 
 from weeping and crying out aloud; and their bitter 
 groans were the most convincing, as well as affecting 
 evidence of the depth of their inward anguish. God 
 is powerfully ar work among them: true and genuine 
 convictions of sin are daily promoted in many in 
 stances, and some are newly awakened from time to 
 time. 
 
 "17. T spent much time in private conference 
 with the Indians. I found one who had newly ob 
 tained comfort, after a long season of spiritual dis 
 tress, he having been one of my hearers in tiie Forks 
 of Delaware for more than a year, and now followed 
 me hither under deep concern: and 1 had abundant 
 reason to hope that his comfort was well grounded. 
 
I/IFB OF BRAINEKD. 123 
 
 < { August 19. I rode to Freehold, and preached to 
 a considerable assembly, from Matt, v, 3. It pleased 
 God to leave me dry and barren; but he has made 
 my soul acquiesce in his will. It is contrary to flesh 
 and blood, to be cut off from all freedom in a large 
 auditory, where their expectations are much raised; 
 but so it was with me; and God helped me to say; 
 <Good is the will of the Lord. 
 
 "23. 1 spent some time with the Indians in pri 
 vate discourse; afterwards preached to them from 
 John v u 44 50. There was a gs-eat attention and 
 some affection among them. Several appeared 
 deeply concerned for their souls, and could not but 
 express their inward anguish by tears and cries. 
 But the amazing influence that has been so power 
 fully among them, seems, at present, in some degree 
 abated. 
 
 "24. I spent the forenoon in discoursing to some 
 of the Indians, in order to their receiving the ordi 
 nance of baptism. When I had opened the nature of 
 the ordinance, the obligations attending it, the duty 
 of devoting ourselves to God in it, arid the privilege 
 of being in covenant with him, sundry of them seem 
 ed to be filled with love to God, and delighted with 
 the thoughts of giving up themselves to him in that 
 solemn and public manner. 
 
 "Afterwards I discoursed publicly from 1 Thcss. 
 iv, 1317. There was a solemn attention and visi 
 ble concern in the time of public service, which was 
 afterwards increased by some further exhortation 
 given them to come to Christ and give up their hearts 
 to him, that they might be fit f e<l to ascend up and 
 meet him in the air, when he shall descend with a 
 shout, and the voice of the archangel. 
 
 "There were several Indians newly come, who 
 thought their state good, because they had lived with 
 the white people under gospel light, although they 
 were altogether unacquainted with the power of re 
 ligion. 
 
 "With those I discoursed particularly after public 
 worship, and was surprised to see their self-righteous 
 
124 LIFE OF BRAISTERIJ. 
 
 disposition, their strong attachment to the covenant 
 of works, and the higi, value they put upon their sup 
 posed attainments. Yet after much discourse, one 
 appeared convinced, that c by the deeds of the law no 
 flesh living should be justified, 9 and wept bitterly, in 
 quiring, what he mu.vt do to be saved?* 
 
 "LordVday, August 25. J preached in the fore 
 noon from Luke xv, 3 7. There being a multitude 
 of white people present, I made an address to them 
 at the close of my discourse: but could not so much 
 as keep them orderly; for scores of them kept walk 
 ing and gazing about, and behaved more indecently 
 than any Indians I ever addressed, 
 
 "Afterwards 1 baptized twenty-five persons of the 
 Indians, fifteen adults, and ten children. Most of 
 the adults I have reason to hope are renewed per 
 sons: only the case of two or three appeared more 
 doubtful. 
 
 "After the crowd of spectators was gone, I called 
 the baptized persons together, and discoursed to them 
 in particular, minded them of the solemn obligations, 
 they were under to live to God, and encouraged them 
 to watchfulness and devotion, by setting before them 
 the comfort and happy conclusion of a religious life. 
 This was a sweet season indeed! Their hearts were 
 engaged and cheerful in duty, and they rejoiced that 
 they had in a public and solemn manner dedicated 
 themselves to God. Love seemed to reign among 
 them. They took each other by the hand with ten 
 derness and affection, as if their hearts were knit 
 together, while I was discoursing to them; and all 
 their deportment towards each other, was such that 
 a serious spectator might justly be excited to cry out 
 with admiration, Behold how they love one anoth 
 er! 9 Sundry of the other Indians at seeing and 
 hearing these tilings were much affected arid wept 
 bitterly, longing to be partakers of the same joy and 
 comfort that these discovered by their countenances 
 as well as conduct. 
 
 <26. I preached to my people from John vi, 51, 
 55. After I had discoursed some time, I addressed 
 
LIFE OF BRAIffERD. 125 
 
 those in particular who entertained hopes that they 
 were passed from death to life/ I opened to them 
 the persevering nature of those consolations Christ 
 gives his people, showed them that such have already 
 the beginnings of eternal life, (ver. 54.) and that 
 their heaven shall he speedily completed. 
 
 "I no sooner began to discourse, but the Christians 
 in the congregation began to be melted with affec 
 tion to, and desire of the enjoyment of Christ, and 
 of a state of perfect purity. They wept affection 
 ately and yet joyfully, and their tears and sobs dis 
 covered brokenness of heart, and yet were attended 
 with comfort and sweetness; so that this was a ten 
 der, affectionate, humble, delightful melting, and ap 
 peared to be the genuine effect of the Spirit of adop 
 tion, and very far from the spirit of bondage that 
 they before labored under. The influence spread 
 from these through the whole assembly, and there 
 quickly appeared a wonderful concern among them. 
 Many, who had not yet found Christ, were surpris 
 ingly engaged in seeking after him. Their number 
 was now about ninety-five persons, and almost all 
 affected either with joy in Christ, or with the utmost 
 concern to obtain an interest in him. 
 
 "Being convinced it was now my duty to take a 
 journey tar back to the Indians on Susquahannah 
 river, after having spent some hours in public and 
 private discourses with my people, 1 told them that 
 I must leave them for the present, and go to their 
 brethren far remote, and preach to them, that I 
 wanted the Spirit of God should go with me, with 
 out whom nothing could be done to any good pur 
 pose, as they themselves had an opportunity to see: 
 and asked them, if they would not spend the remain 
 der of the day in prayer for me, that God would go 
 with me, and succeed my endeavors; they cheerfully 
 complied with the motion, and soon after I left them, 
 (the sun being then about one hour and a half high,) 
 they began and continued praying all night until 
 break of day, never mistrusting (they told rne) until 
 
126 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 they went out and saw the morning star a consider 
 able height, that it was later than common bed time. 
 
 There were, I trusr, this day two distressed souls 
 brought to the enjoyment of solid comfort. 
 
 "Likewise this day an old Indian, who has all his 
 days been an obstinate idolater, was brought to give 
 lip his rattles (which they use for music in their 
 idolatrous feasts and dances) to the other Indians, 
 who quickly destroyed them: and this without any 
 attempt of mine in the affair, 1 having said nothing 
 to him about it; so that it was the power of God s 
 word, without any particular application to this sin, 
 that produced this effect. Thus God has begun, 
 thus he has hitherto carried on a work of grace 
 amongst these Indians. May the glory be ascribed 
 to him who is the oJe author of it.* 
 
 The next day f^c set out on a journey towards the 
 Forks of Delaware, designing to go from hence to 
 Susquahannah, before he returned to Crosweeksung; 
 it was five days from his departure from Crosweek- 
 sung, before he reached the Forks, going round by 
 the way of Philadelphia, and waiting on the gover 
 nor of Pennsylvania, to get a recommendation from 
 him to the chiefs of the Indians. 
 
 FORKS OF DELAWARE. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Sept. 1. I preached to the Indians 
 here, from Luke xiv, 16 23. Afterwards 1 preach 
 ed to a number of white people, and observed many 
 of them in tears, and some who had been formerly 
 as careless and unconcerned about religion as the 
 Indians. 
 
 "Towards night I discoursed to the Indians again, 
 and perceived a great attention, and more visible 
 concern among them, than has been usual in these 
 parts. 
 
 "3. I preached to the Indians from Isaiah liii, 
 3 6. The divine presence was in the midst of the 
 assembly, and a considerable concern spread among 
 
LIFE OF ERAINERD. 127 
 
 them. Sundry persons were awakened, among 
 whom were two stupid creatures, that 1 could scarce 
 ever before keep awake while 1* was discoursing to 
 them. 
 
 "4. I rode 15 miles to an Irish settlement, and 
 preached there, from Luke xiv, 22, "And yet there 
 is room." God was pleased to afford me some ten 
 derness and enlargement in the first prayer, and 
 much freedom, 4 as well as warmth, in the sermon. 
 There were maiiy tears in the assembly: the people 
 of God seemed to melt, and others to be in some 
 measure awakened. Blessed be the Lord y that lets 
 me see his work going on in one place and another. 
 
 5. I discoursed to the Indians from the parable 
 of the sower, arid afterwards conversed with sundry 
 persons, which occasioned them to weep, and even 
 to cry out in an affecting manner, and seized others 
 with surprise and concern. Several of these had 
 been with me to I rosweeksung, and some of them 
 felt the power of God s word. I asked one of them 
 why he now cried; he replied, **When he thought 
 how Christ was slain like a lamb, and spilt his blood 
 for sinners, he could not help crying;" and thereup 
 on burst out into tears and cries ap;ain. I then ask 
 ed his wife, who likewise had been abundantly com 
 forted, wherefore she cried? She answered, <She 
 was grieved that the Indians here would not come 
 to Christ, as well as those at Croswceksung, I 
 asked her if she found a heart to pray for them, and 
 whether Christ had been near to her of late in prayer, 
 as in time past? (which is my usual method of ex 
 pressing a sense of the divine presence.) She replied, 
 4 Yes, he had been near to her; and that at some 
 times when she had been praying alone, her heart 
 loved to pray so, that she could not bear to leave the 
 place, but wanted, to stay and pray longer. 
 
 "Lord s-day, 8. I discoursed to the Indians in the 
 forenoon from John xii, 44 50; in the afternoon 
 from Acts ii, 36 39. The word of God seemed to 
 fall with weight and influence upon them. Most of 
 them were in tears, and cried out uader distressing 
 
128 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 oncern for their souls. One man was awakened, 
 \vho never before discovered any concern for his soul. 
 There appeared a remarkable work of the Spirit 
 among them, not unlike what has been of late at 
 Crosweeksung. It seemed as if (he Divine influence 
 had spread from thence to this place. 
 
 "Sundry of the careless white people now present, 
 were startled, seeing the power of God so prevalent 
 among the Indians. I then made a particular address 
 to them, which seemed to make some impression upon 
 them. 
 
 "In the evening God was pleased to enlarge me in 
 prayer, and gave me freedom at the throne of grace: 
 I cried to God for the enlargement of his kingdom 
 in the world, and particularly among my dear peo 
 ple: and was enabled to pray for many dear minis 
 ters of my acquaintance, both in these parts, and in 
 New England. My soul was so engaged in that 
 sweet exercise, that 1 knew not how to leave the mer 
 cy-seat. I saw God was both able and willing to 
 do all that I desired, for myself and friends, and his 
 church in general. And afterwards, when I was 
 just going to bed, God helped me to renew my peti 
 tions with ardency and freedom. 
 
 "Sept. 9. I left the Indians in the Forks of Dela 
 ware, and set out on a journey towards Susquahan- 
 nah river, directing my course towards the Indian 
 town more than 120 miles westward from the Forks. 
 
 "13. After having lodged out three nights, I ar 
 rived at the Indian town on Susquahannah, called 
 Shaumoking, (one of the places I visited in May last,) 
 and was kindly received by the Indians; but had lit 
 tle satisfaction by reason of the heathenish dance 
 they then held in the house where I was obliged to 
 lodge, which I could not suppress, though I often in- 
 treated them to desist, for the sake of one of their 
 own friends who was sick in the house. 
 
 "This town lies partly on the east side of the 
 river, partly on the west, and partly on a large island 
 in it, and contains upwards of fifty houses, and near 
 three hundred persons: but of three different tribes 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 of Indians, speaking three languages wholly unintel 
 ligible to each other. About one half of its inhabit 
 ants are Delawares, the others called Senekas, and 
 Tutelas. The Indians of this place are counted the 
 most drunken, mischievous, and ruffianly fellows of 
 any in these parts; and saian seems to have his seat 
 in this town in an eminent manner. 
 
 "Sept. 14. I visited the Delaware king, (who was 
 supposed to be at the point of death when I was here 
 in May last; hut was now recovered,) and discoursed 
 with him and others respecting Christianity, and 
 spent the afternoon with them and had more encour 
 agement than 1 expected. The king appeared kindly 
 disposed, and willing to he instructed; this gave me 
 some encouragement that God would open an effect 
 ual door for my preaching the Gospel here. This 
 was a refreshment to me in the wilderness, and ren 
 dered my solitary circumstances comfortable and 
 pleasant. 
 
 In the evening my soul was enlarged in prayer, 
 especially, that God would set up his kingdom, in 
 this place, where the devil now reigns. My soul cri 
 ed, <Lord, set up thy kingdom, for thine own glory. 
 Glorify thyself: and I shall rejoice. Get honor to 
 thy blessed name; and this is all I desire. Do with 
 me just what thou wilt. Blessed be thy name for 
 ever, that thou art God, and that thou wilt glorify 
 thyself. O that the whole world might glorify thee! 
 O let these poor people be brought to know thee, and 
 love thee, for the glory of thy ever-blessed name! 
 
 "Lord s-day, Sept. 15. I visited the chief of the 
 Delawares again; and discoursed to the Indians in 
 the afternoon. I hoped that God would open their 
 hearts to receive the Gospel, though many of them in 
 the place were so drunk from day to day, that I could 
 get no opportunity to speak to them. 
 
 "Sept. 16. I spent the forenoon with the Indians, 
 endeavoring to instruct them from house to house, 
 and to engage them to be friendly to Christianity. 
 
ISO XIFE OF BRAINEKD. 
 
 "Towards night I went to a part of the town 
 where they were sober, and got together near fifty 
 persons, There was a surprising attention among 
 them, and they manifested a desire of being further 
 instructed. There was also one or two that seemed 
 to be touched, who appeared pleased with some con 
 versation in private, after I had concluded my pub 
 lic discourse. 
 
 "My spirit was much refreshed, and I could not 
 but return with my interpreter, (having no other 
 companion in this journey,) to my poor hard lodg 
 ings, rejoicing in hopes that God designed to set up 
 his kingdom here, and found uncommon freedom in 
 addressing the throne of grace for the accomplish 
 ment of so glorious work. 
 
 "17. I spent the forenoon in discoursing to the In 
 dians. About noon t left Shaumoking, (most of the 
 Indians going out this day to hunt,) and travelled 
 down the river south-westward. 
 
 "19. I visited an Indian town called Juneautn, sit 
 uated on an island in Susquahannah. I was much 
 discouraged with the behavior of the Indians here, 
 although they appeared friendly when I was with 
 them last spring; yet they now seemed resolved to 
 retain their pagan notions, and persist in their idol 
 atrous practices. 
 
 "20. I visited the Indians again at Juneauta isl 
 and, and found them busy in making preparations 
 for a great sacrifice and dance. So I had no oppor 
 tunity to get them together in order to discourse with 
 them about Christianity. My spirits were much 
 sunk, especially as I had now no interpreter but a 
 pagan, who was as much attached to idolatry as any 
 of them: so that I was under the greatest disadvan 
 tages imaginable. However, I attempted to discourse 
 privately with some of them but without any appear 
 ance of success. 
 
 "In the evening they met together, near an hun 
 dred of them, and danced around a large fire, hav 
 ing prepared ten fat deer for the sacrifice. The fat of 
 whose inwards they burnt in the fire while they were 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 131 
 
 dancing, and at some times raised the flame to a pro 
 digious height, at the same time yelling and shout 
 ing in such a manner that they might have heen 
 heard two miles or more. They continued their sa 
 cred dance all night; after which they eat tlwjlesh of 
 the sacrifice, and retired each to his lodging. 
 
 "I enjoyed little satisfaction this night, being en 
 tirely alone on the island, (as to any Christian com 
 pany,) and in the midst of this idolatrous revel; and 
 having walked to and fro till body and mind were 
 much oppressed, 1 at length crept into a little crib 
 made for corn, and there slept on the poles. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Sept. 21. 1 spent the day with the 
 Indians on the island. As soon as they were up in 
 the morning, I attempted to instruct them, and la 
 bored to get them together, but quickly found they 
 had something else to do; for they gathered together 
 all their powwows (or conjurers,) and set about half 
 a dozen of them to playing their tricks, and acting 
 their frantic postures, in order to find out why 
 they were so sickly, numbers of them being at that 
 time disordered with a fever, and bloody flux. Jn 
 this they were engaged for several hours, making all 
 the wild distracted motions imaginable; sometimes 
 singing; sometimes howling; sometimes extending 
 their hands to the utmost stretch, spreading all their 
 fingers, and seemed to push with them, as if they 
 designed to fright something away, or at least keep 
 it off at arms end; sometimes stroking their faces 
 with their hands, then spurting water as fine as mist; 
 sometimes sitting flat on the earth, then bowing down 
 their faces to the ground: wringing their sides, as if 
 in pain and anguish: twisting their faces, turning up 
 their eyes, grunting, or puffing. 
 
 "Their monstrous actions seemed to have some- 
 tiling in them peculiarly suited to raise the devil, if 
 he could be raised by any thing odd arid frightful. 
 Some of them were much more fervent in the busi 
 ness than others, and seemed to chant, peep, and 
 mutter with a great degree of warmth and vigor; I 
 sat about thirty feet from them (though undiscover- 
 
j 32 XIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 e<!) with my Bible in my ham!, resolving, if possible, 
 to spoil their sport, and prevent their receiving any 
 answers from the infernal world. They continued 
 their hideous charms for more than three hours, un 
 til they had all wearied themselves out, although 
 they had taken sundry intervals of rest, and at 
 length broke up, I apprehend, without receiving any 
 answer. 
 
 "After they had done powwowing, I attempted to 
 discourse with them about Christianity; hut they 
 soon scattered, and gave no opportunity. A view of 
 these things, while 1 was entirely alone in the wil 
 derness, destitute of the society of any one that so 
 much as named the name of Christ, greatly sunk 
 my spirits, so that I had no heart nor power to make 
 any further attempts among them. 
 
 "The Indians of this island many of them under 
 stand the English language, having formerly lived 
 in Maryland near the white people, hut are very 
 Yicious, drunken, and profane, although not so sav 
 age as those who have less acquaintance with the 
 .English. Their method of charming or conjuring 
 over the sick, seems somewhat different from that of 
 other Indians; and the whole of it perhaps is an in 
 timation of what seems, by Naaman s expression, 2 
 lungs v, 11, to have been the custom of the ancient 
 heathens. For it chiefly consists in their striking 
 their hands over the diseased, repeatedly stroking 
 of them, <and calling upon their gods, excepting 
 their spurting of water, and some other frantic cer 
 emonies common to the other conjurations. 
 
 "When I was in these parts in May last, I had an 
 opportunity of learning many of the customs of the 
 Indians: 1 then travelling ISO miles upon the river 
 above the English settlements: and had in that jour- 
 no, v a view of persons of seven or eight distinct 
 tribes; speaking so many different languages. But 
 of all the sights 1 ever saw among them, none ap 
 peared so near a-kin to what is usually imagined of 
 infernal powers, as the appearance of one who was 
 a devout and zealous reformer or rather restorer, ol 
 
JLIFE OF BRAINBRD. 133 
 
 what he supposed was the ancient religion of the In 
 dians. He made his appearance in his pontifical 
 garb, which was a coat of bear-skins, dressed with 
 the hair on, and hanging down to his toes, a pair of 
 bear-skin stockings, and a great wooden face, paint- 
 ed the one half black, and the other tawny, about 
 the color of an Indian s skin, with an extravagant 
 mouth, cut very much awry: the face fastened to a 
 bear-skin cap, which was drawn over his head. He 
 advanced toward me with the instrument in his 
 hand that he used for music in his idolatrous worship, 
 which was a dry tortoise-shell, with some corn in il 9 
 and the neck of it drawn on a piece of wood, which 
 made a very convenient handle. As he came for 
 ward, he beat his tune with the rattle, and danced 
 with all his might, but did not suffer any part of his 
 body, not so much as his fingers, to be seen; and no 
 man would have guessed by his appearance, that he 
 could have been a human creature. When he came 
 near me, I could not but shrink away from him, al 
 though it was then noon-day, and 1 knew who it was v 
 his appearance and gestures were so frightful. He 
 had a house consecrated to religious uses; with di 
 vers images cut out upon the several parts of it: I 
 went in, and found the ground beat almost as hard 
 as a rock with their frequent dancing. 1 discoursed 
 with him about Christianity; and some of my dis* 
 course he seemed to like, but some of it he disliked 
 entirely. He told me, that God had taught him his 
 religion, and that he never would turn from it, but 
 wanted to find some that would join heartily with 
 him in it; for the Indians, he said, were grown very 
 degenerate. He had thoughts of leaving all his 
 friends, and travelling abroad in order to find some 
 that would join with him; for he believed God had 
 some good people somewhere, that felt as he did. He 
 had not always, he said, felt as he now did, but had 
 formerly been like the rest of the Indians, until four 
 or five years ago; then, he said, his heart was very 
 much distressed, so that he could not live among the 
 Indians, but got away into the woods, and lived 
 #12 
 
134 ilFE OF BRAINEUB, 
 
 alone for some months. At length, he says, God 
 showed him what he should do: and since that time 
 lie has known G-od, and tried to serve him; and 
 loved all men, he the} who they would, so as he 
 never did before. He treated me with uncommon 
 courtesy, and seemed to b< hearty in it. 1 was told 
 by the Indians, that he opposed their drinking strong 
 liquors \vith all his power; and if at any time he 
 could not persuade them from it, he would leave 
 them and go crying into the woods. It was manifest 
 he had a set of religious notions that he had looked 
 into/or himself, and not taken for granted upon hare 
 tradition; and he relished or disrelished whatever 
 was spoken of a religious nature, according as it 
 either agreed, or disagreed with his standard. While 
 I was discoursing, he would sometimes say, Now, 
 that I like: so God has taught me. And some of 
 his sentiments seemed Very just. Yet he utterly 
 denied the being of a devil, and declared there was 
 no such a creature known among the Indians of old 
 times. He likewise told me, that departed souls all 
 went southward; and that the difference between the 
 good and bad was this; that the former were ad 
 mitted into a beautiful town with spiritual walls, or 
 walls agreeable to the nature of souls; and that the 
 latter would for ever hover round those walls, and 
 in vain attempt to get in. He seemed to be sincere, 
 honest, and conscientious in his own way, which was 
 more than ever 1 saw in any other pagan: and 1 per 
 ceived he was looked upon, and derided amongst 
 most of the Indians as a precise zealot. I must say, 
 there was something in his temper that looked more 
 like true religion than any thing I ever observed 
 among other heathen. 
 
 "Sept. S2. I made some further attempts to in 
 struct the Indians on this island, but all to no pur 
 pose. They live so near the white people, that they 
 are always in the way of strong liquor, as well as the 
 ill examples of nominal Christians, which renders it 
 unspeakably difficult to treat with them about Chris 
 tianity." 
 
MFE OF BRAINEIID. 135 
 
 Next day he left the Indians, in order to his re 
 turn to the Forks of Delaware, in a very weak state 
 of body, and under dejection of mind, which continu 
 ed the two first days of his journey. 
 
 "Sept. 26. 1 was still mud) disorder^ in body 
 and able to ride but slowly, i continued my journey 
 however. Near night I arrived at the Irish settle 
 ment, about fifteen miles from my own house. I 
 was much exercised With a sense of my barrenness, 
 and verify thought there was no creature that had 
 any true grace, but what was more spiritual and 
 fruitful irnui i: I could not think that any of God s 
 chiiureii made so poor a hand of living to God as 1. * 
 
 FOEKS OF DELAWARE. 
 
 "October 1. J discoursed to the Indians here 
 and afterwards invited them to accompany, or to 
 follow me, down to Crosweeksung, as soon as their 
 conveniency would admit; which invitation sundry 
 of them cheerfully accepted. 
 
 "5. I preached to my people at Crosweeksung, 
 from John xiv, l 6. The divine presence seemed 
 to be in the assembly. Numbers were affected, and 
 some comforted. 
 
 "O what a difference is there between these and 
 the Indians upon Susquahannah! To be with those 
 seemed like being banished from God, and all his 
 people; to be with these, like being admitted into his 
 family, and to the enjoyment of his presence! How 
 great is the change lately made upon these Indians, 
 who, not many months ago, were as thoughtless and 
 averse to Christianity, as those upon Susquahannah! 
 
 "Lord s-day, Oct. 6. I preached in the forenoon, 
 from John x, 7 11. There was a considerable 
 melting among my people; the young Christians 
 were comforted and strengthened, and one or two 
 persons newly awakened. 
 
 "In the afternoon, 1 discoursed on the story of the 
 jailor, Acts xvi; and in the evening, expounded Acts 
 xx, 1 12. There was, at this time a melting 
 
136 1IFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 through the whole assembly. There was scarce a. 
 dry eye to he seen among them, and nothing but 
 what tended to encourage and excite a, Christian ar 
 dor and sj irit of devotion. 
 
 * 4 Attct public service 1 withdrew, and the Indians 
 continued praying among themselves for near two 
 hours together; which exercises appeaivd to be at 
 tended with a blessed influence from on high. 
 
 i could not but earnestly wish that numbers of 
 God s people had been present at this season to see 
 and hear these things, which 1 am sure must refresh 
 the heart of every true lover of Zion. To sec those, 
 who very lately were savage Pagans, and idolaters, 
 having no hope, and without God in the/world, now 
 filled with a sense of divine love and grace, and 
 worshipping the Father in spirit and in truth, was 
 not a liitle affecting; and especially to see them so 
 tender and humble, as well as lively, fervent, and de 
 vout. 
 
 <4 7. Being called by the church and people of 
 East Hampton, on Long Island, as a member of a 
 council, to assist and advise in affairs of difficulty in 
 that church, 1 sat out on my journey this morning, 
 before it was well light, and travelled to Elizabeth- 
 town/ 
 
 He prosecuted his journey with the other minis 
 ters that were sent for, and did not return till Octo- 
 ber 24. 
 
 "24. I discoursed from John iv, 13, 14. There 
 was a great attention, and an unaffected melting in 
 the assembly. It is surprising to see how eager 
 they are of hearing the word of God. I have often 
 thought they would cheerfully attend divine worship 
 twenty-four hours together. 
 
 "25. 1 discoursed to my people on the resurrec 
 tion, from Luke xx, 27 36. And when I came to 
 mention the blessedness the good shall enjoy at that 
 season; their final freedom from death and sorrow; 
 their equality to the angels, in regard of their near 
 ness to, and enjoyment of Christ; and their being 
 the children of God, openly acknowledged by him as 
 
LIFE 0^ BRAINERD. 157 
 
 such: 1 say when I mentioned these things, numbers 
 of them were much affected and melted with a view 
 of this blessed state. 
 
 "26. Being called to assist in the administration 
 of the Lord s supper, in a neighboring congregation. 
 1 invited my people to go with me, who embraced 
 the opportunity cheerfully, and attended the dis 
 courses of that solemnity with diligence and affection, 
 most of them now understanding something of the 
 English language. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Oct. 27. While 1 was preaching to 
 a vast assembly of people abroad, who appeared gen 
 erally easy and secure enough; there was one Indian 
 woman a stranger, who never heard me preach be 
 fore, nor ever regarded any thingaboutreligion (being 
 now persuaded by some of her friends to come though 
 much against her will,) was seized with a pressing con 
 cern for her soul, and soon after expressed a great de 
 sire of going home (more than forty miles distant,) to 
 call her husband, that he also might have a concern 
 for his soul. Some other of the Indians also appear 
 ed to be affected with divine truths this day. 
 
 The pious people of the English (numbers of 
 whom 1 had an opportunity to converse with) seemed 
 refreshed with seeing the Indians worship God in 
 that devout and solemn manner, anil could not but 
 glorify God, saying, Then hath fcod also to the 
 Gentiles granted repentance unto life. 
 
 "28. 1 discoursed from- Matt, xxii, 1 13, I was 
 enabled to adapt my discourse to the capacities of my 
 people, I now not how, in a plain, easy, and familiar 
 manner, beyond all that I could have dune by the ut 
 most study; and this with, as much freedom as if 1 
 had been addressing a common audience, who had 
 been instructed in Christianity ail their days. 
 
 "The word of God, at this time, seemed to fall up 
 on the assembly with a Divine power, especially to 
 ward the close of my discourse: there was both a 
 sweet melting and bitter mourning in the audience. 
 The Christians were refreshed and comforted, con 
 victions revived in others* and sundry persons newly 
 
138 1IFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 awakened, who had never been with us before; and 
 so much of the Divine presence appeared in the as 
 sembly, that it seemed <this was no other than the 
 gale of heaven. 7 All that had any relish of Divine 
 things were even constrained to say, l Lord, it is good 
 for us to be here! if ever there was among my peo 
 ple an appearance of the New Jerusalem, *as a bride 
 adorned for her husband/ there was at this time. 
 And so agreeable was the entertainment, that I could 
 scarcely tell how to leave the place. 
 
 "LordVday, Nov. 3. 1 baptized fourteen Indians^ 
 six adults and eight children: one of these was near 
 fourscore years of age, and I have reason to hope, 
 God has brought her home to himself: two of the 
 others \\ere men of filty years old, who had been 
 singular even among the Indians, for their wicked 
 ness: one of them had been a murderer, and both 
 notorious drunkards, as well as excessive quarrel 
 some: but now 1 cannot but hope both are really 
 changed. 1 deferred their baptism for many weeks, 
 that 1 might have more opportunities to observe the 
 fruits of those impressions they had been under. In 
 deed there was riot one of the adults but had given 
 me grounds to hope that God had wrought a good 
 work in their hearts. 
 
 "4.. There were sundry of the persons lately 
 come from remoter places, that were now brought un 
 der deep concern for their souls; particularly one, 
 who, not long since, came half drunk, and railed on 
 us, and attempted to disturb us while engaged in 
 Divine worship, was so distressed, that she seemed 
 unable to get any ease without an interest in Christ. 
 There were many tears, and affectionate groans in 
 the assembly in general; some weeping for them 
 selves, others for their friends. And though persons 
 are doubtless much easier affected now than they 
 were in the beginning, to this religious concern, 
 when tears and cries tor their souls were things un 
 heard of among them; yet their affection in general 
 appeared genuine and unfeigned, and especially in 
 those newly awakened. 
 
iLIFE OF BRAINERD. 139 
 
 "I baptized a child this day, and perceived several 
 of the baptized persons affected, as being, thereby 
 reminded of their own solemn engagements. 
 
 "I have now baptized forty seven persons of the 
 Indians, twenty-three adults, and twenty -four chil 
 dren; thirty-five of them belonging to these parts, 
 and the rest to the Forks of Delaware: they have 
 none of them, as yet, been a disgrace to their pro 
 fession by any unbecoming behavior. 
 
 "Before 1 proceed, 1 would make a few remarks. 
 
 "And, first, [t is remarkable that God began this 
 work among the Indians at a timf when 1 had the 
 least prospect of seeing a work of grace among 
 them. My bodily strength being then much wasted 
 by a tedious journey to Susquahannah, my mind ex 
 ceedingly depressed with a view of the unseasona- 
 bleness of my labors, had little reason to hope that 
 God lusd made me instrumental of the saving con 
 version of any of the Indians, win nee I was ready 
 to look upon myself as a burden to the society that 
 employed me in this business. I began to entertain 
 serious thoughts of giving up my mission, and 
 almost resolved I would do so at the conclusion of 
 the present year, if I had then no better prospect in 
 my work than I had hitherto had. 
 
 "Jn this frame of mind I first visited these In 
 dians at Crosweeksung, apprehending it was my 
 duty to make some attempts for their Conversion, 
 though I cannot say 1 had any hopes of success, my 
 spirits were now so extremely sunk. 
 
 "And yet this was the very season that God saw 
 lit to begin this glorious work in! And thus he or 
 dained strength out of weakness/ by making bare his 
 almighty arm at a time when all hopes and human 
 probabilities most evidently failed. Whence I learn 
 that it is good to follow the path of duty, though in 
 the midst of darkness and discouragement. 
 
 "Secondly, It is remarkable how God, in a man 
 ner almost unaccountable, called these Indians to 
 gether to be instructed, and how he seized their 
 .minds with the most solemn concern as fast as they 
 
140 LIFE BIIAIXERD. 
 
 came to the place where his word was preached. 
 When i first came to these parts, 1 found not one 
 man at the place i visited* but only four women and 
 a lew children: but before i had been here many 
 days, they gathered from all quarters, some from 
 more than twenty miles distant: and when 1 made 
 them a scco-nd visit, some came more than forty 
 miles to hear me. 
 
 <*And many came without any intelligence of 
 what was going on here, and consequently without 
 any design, so much as to gratify their curiosity; so 
 that it seemed as if God had summoned them togeth 
 er from all quarters to deliver his message to them. 
 "Nor is it less surprising that they were, one 
 after another affected with a solemn concern for 
 their souls almost as soon as they came upon the 
 spot where divine truths were taught them. 1 could 
 not but think their coming to this place was like 
 Saul and his messengers coming among the proph 
 ets; and they no sooner came but they prophesied: 
 and these were almost as soon affected with a sense 
 of their sin and misery, and with an earnest concern 
 for deliverance, as they made their appearance in 
 our assembly. After this work of grace began with 
 power among them, it w r as common for strangers of 
 the Indians, before they had been with us one day, 
 to be deeply convinced of their sin and misery, and 
 to inquire with great solicitude, What they should do 
 to be saved? 
 
 "Thirdly: It is likewise remarkable how God 
 preserved these poor ignorant Indians from being 
 prejudiced against me, and the truths I taught them. 
 There were many attempts made by some of the 
 while people to prejudice them against, or fright them 
 from Christianity. They sometimes told them, the 
 Indians were well enough already: that there was no 
 need of all this noise about Christianity: that if they 
 wore Christians, they would be in no better, no safer, 
 or happier state than they were already. 
 
 < Sometimes they told them that I was a knave, a 
 deceiver; that I daily taught them lies, and had no 
 other design but to impose upon them. 
 
1IFE OF BRAINERD. 14 1 
 
 "And when none of these suggestions would 
 avail, they told the Indians, <my design was to 
 gather together as large a body of them as I possi 
 bly could, and then sell them to England for slaves.* 
 Nothing could be more likely to terrify the Indians, 
 they being naturally of a jealous disposition, and 
 the most averse to a state of servitude perhaps of 
 any people living. 
 
 "But all these insinuations (through divine good 
 ness) constantly turned against the authors of them, 
 and only served to engage the affections of the In 
 dians more firmly to me; for they could not but ob 
 serve, that the persons who endeavored to imbitter 
 their minds against me, were altogether unconcerned 
 about their own souls; and not only so, but vicious 
 and profane; and thence could not but argue, that if 
 they had no concern for their own, it was not likely 
 they should have for the souls of others. 
 
 "It seems yet the more wonderful, that the Indians 
 were preserved from once hearkening to these sug 
 gestions, as I was an utter stranger among them, 
 and could give them no assurance of my sincere 
 affection, by any thing that was past: while the per 
 sons that insinuated these things were their old ac 
 quaintance, who had had frequent opportunities of 
 gratifying them with strong drink, and consequently 
 had the greatest interest in their affections. 
 
 "Fourthly: Nor is it less wonderful how God was 
 pleased to provide a remedy for my want of skill in 
 the Indian language, by remarkably fitting my in 
 terpreter for, and assisting him in the performance 
 of his work. It might be supposed I must labor un 
 der a vast disadvantage in addressing the Indians by 
 an interpreter, and that divine truths would unavoid 
 ably lose much of their energy, by coming to the au 
 dience from a second hand. But although this has 
 often been the case in times past, when my interpret 
 er had little sense of divine things, yet now it is 
 quite otherwise. I cannot think my addresses to 
 the Indians ordinarily since the beginning of this sea- 
 Son of grace, have lost any thing of the power with 
 13 
 
- LIFE OF JJRAIXEKI). 
 
 which they were made, unless it were sometimes for 
 want of pertinent expressions in the Indian s lan 
 guage; which difficulty could not have been much re 
 dressed by rny personal acquaintance with it. My 
 interpreter had before gained some good degree of 
 doctrinal knowledge, vherebv he was capable of un 
 derstanding and communicating the meaning of n>y 
 discourses, and that \\if-hoiit being obliged to inter 
 pret word for void. He had likewise an experi 
 mental acquaintance with divine things; and it 
 pleased God at this season to inspire his mind with 
 longing desires for the conversion of the Indians, 
 and to give him admirable zeal and fervency in ac - 
 dressing them. And it is remarkable, that when I 
 was favored with any special assistance, and enabled 
 to speak with more than common freedom, ftriency, 
 and;;otrer, he was usually affected in the same man 
 ner almost instantly, and seemed at once quickened 
 arid enabled to speak in the same pathetic language, 
 and under the same influence that 1 did. And a 
 surprising energy often accompanied the word at 
 such seasons; so that the face ot the whole assembly 
 would be apparently changed almost in an instant, 
 and tears and sobs became common among them. 
 
 "He likewise took pains, day and night, to repeat 
 and inculcate upon the minds of the Indians the 
 truths I taught them daily; and this not from spirit 
 ual pride, but from a spirit of faithfulness, and an 
 honest concern for their souls. 
 
 "And thus God has manifested, that without be 
 stowing on me the gift of tongues, he could find a 
 way, wherein I might be effectually enabled to convey 
 the truths of his glorious Gospel to the minds of these 
 poor benighted Pagans. 
 
 "Lastly: The effects of this work have been very 
 remarkable. J doubt not but that many of these 
 people have gained more knowledge of divine truths 
 since June last, than could have been instilled into 
 their minds by the most diligent use of proper means 
 for whole years together, without such a divine influ 
 ence. Their Pagan notions, and idolatrous practices, 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 143 
 
 seem to be entirely abandoned. They are regularly 
 disposed in the affairs of marriage: an instance 
 vhcreof I have given in my journal of August 14. 
 They seem generally divorced from drunkenness, 
 their darling vice, and tiie <sin that easily besets 
 them, so that I do not know of more than two or 
 three who have been my steady hearers, that have 
 drank to excess since 1 first visited them, although 
 before it was common for some or other of them to 
 be drunk almost every day; and some of them seem 
 now to lear this sin in particular more than death 
 itself. A principle of honesty and justice appears 
 in many of them; and they seem concerned to dis- 
 eharge ilieir old debts, which they have neglected, 
 and perhaps scarce thought of for years past. Their 
 manner of living is much more decent and comfort 
 able than formerly. Love reigns among them, es 
 pecially those who have experienced a real change: 
 and [ never saw any appearance of bitterness or cen- 
 soriousness, nor any disposition to <esteem themselves 
 better than others. 
 
 "As their sorrows under conviction have been great 
 and pressing, so many of them have since appeared 
 to <reji)ice with joy unspeakable. And yet their con 
 solations do not incline them to lightness, but are at 
 tended with solemnity and with tears, and broken- 
 ness of heart. And in this respect, some of them 
 have been surprised at themselves, and have with 
 concern observed to me, that when their hearts have 
 been glad, they could not help crying for all. 
 
 "Upon the whole, here are all the evidences of a 
 remarkable work of grace that can reasonably be 
 looked for. May the great Author maintain and 
 promote the same here, and propagate it every 
 where till the whole earth be filled with his glory! 
 
 *[ have now rode more than three thousand miles 
 since the beginning of March last, and almost the 
 whfle of it has been in my own business as a mis 
 sionary, upon the design of propagating Christian 
 knowledge among the Indians. I have taken pains 
 to look out for a colleague, or companion, to travel 
 
144 LIFE OF BRA13VERD. 
 
 \\ith me; but have not as yet found an^ person 
 qualified and disposed for this good work. 
 
 "As these poor pagans stood in need of having 
 *line upon line, and precept upon precept, in order 
 to their being grounded in the principles of Chris 
 tianity; so i preached publicly, and taught from 
 house to house, almost every day, for whole weeks 
 together, and my public discourses did not then make 
 up the one half of my work, while there were so many 
 constantly coming to me with that important inquiry, 
 what must we do to be saved? And yet i can say, 
 to the praise of God, that the success with which my 
 labors were crowned, unspeakably more than com 
 pensated for the labor itself, and was likewise a great 
 means of carrying me through the business and fa 
 tigues which my nature would have sunk under, 
 without such an encouraging prospect. But although 
 this success has afforded matter of support, comfort, 
 and thankfulness; yet in this season 1 have found 
 great need of assistance in my work of one to bear a 
 part of my labors and hardships. 4 May the Lord of 
 the harvest send forth other laborers into this part 
 of his harvest, that those who sit iw darkness may 
 see great light, and that the whole earth may be 
 tilled with the knowledge of himself! " 
 
 Nov. 5. He left the Indians, and spent the re 
 maining part of this week in travelling to various 
 parts of New jersey, in order to make a collection for 
 the use of the Indians, and to obtain a schoolmaster to 
 instruct them. 
 
 Lord s-day, Nov. 10. (At Elizabethtown) I 
 preached in the forenoon from 2 Cor. v, 20: God 
 was pleased to give me freedom and fervency; and 
 the presence of God seemed to be in the assembly; 
 numbers was , affected, and there were many tears 
 among them. In the afternoon, I preached from 
 Luke xiv, 32, Yet there is room! J was favored 
 with divine assistance in the first prayer, and poured 
 out my soul to God with a filial temper: the living 
 God assisted me in the sermon. 
 
LIFE OF BRAINEKD. 145 
 
 "15. I could not cross the ferry by reason of the 
 violence of the wind; nor could I enjoy any place of 
 retirement at the ferry house. Yet God gave me 
 some satisfaction, in meditation and lifting up my 
 heart to him in the midst of company. And although 
 some were drinking and talking profanely, yet my 
 mind was calm and composed. And 1 could not hut 
 bless God, that I was not like to spend an eternity in 
 such company. 
 
 "16. I crossed the ferry about ten o clock; ar 
 rived at Elizabethtown, near night. 1 was in a 
 composed frame of mind, and felt an entire resigna 
 tion with respect to a loss 1 had lately sustained, in 
 having my horse stolen from me the last Wednesday 
 night. 
 
 22. I rode to Mr. Tennent s, and from thence 
 to Ooswecksung, Oh that I could fill up all my 
 time, whether in the house, or by the way, for God! 
 1 was enabled this day to give up my soul to God, 
 and to put all my concerns into his hands; and found 
 real consolation in the thought of being entirely at 
 his disposal, having no will or interest of my ow r n. 
 I have received my all from God: Oh that 1 could 
 return my all to him! Surely God is worthy of my 
 highest affection, and most devout adoration: he is 
 infinitely worthy that 1 should make him my last 
 end, and live for ever to him: Oh that I might never 
 more, in any one instance, live to myself! 
 
 "Lord s-day, Nov. 4. 1 preached from the story 
 of Zaccheus. When I insisted upon the salvation that 
 comes to the sinner, upon his becoming a true believer, 
 the word seemed to be attended with divine power. 
 Numbers were much affected; former convictions 
 were revived; one or two persons newly awakened; 
 and a most affectionate engagement in divine ser 
 vice appeared among them universally. 
 
 "26. 1 was favored \\itli freedom and fervency 
 in my discourse. Many wept and sobbed affection 
 ately, and scarce any appeared unconcerned in the 
 whole assembly. The influence that seized the audU 
 cn.ce appeared gentle, and yet deeply affected the 
 
146 .LIFE OIT BKALSERD. 
 
 heart. It excited in the persons under convictions 
 of their lost state, heavy groans and tears; and in 
 others, who had obtained comfort, a sweet and hum 
 ble melting. It seemed like the gentle but steady 
 showers that effectually water the earth. 
 
 "The persons lately awakened were deeply dis 
 tressed and appeared earnestly solicitous to obtain 
 an interest in Christ: and some of them, in anguish 
 of spirit, said, They knew not w hat to do, nor how 
 to get their wicked hearts changed. 
 
 "28. After public service was over, I asked one 
 of the Indians, who wept most affectionately, what 
 she now wanted? she replied, Oh to be with Christ; 
 she did not know how to stay. This was a blessed 
 refreshing season to the religious people in general. 
 The Lord Jesus Christ seemed to manifest his divine 
 glory to them, as when transfigured before his disci 
 ples. And they were ready, universally, to say, 
 *Lord, it is good for us to be here. 
 
 "The influence of God s word was not confined to 
 those who had given evidences of being truly gra 
 cious, though I calculated iny discourse for, and 
 directed it chiefly to such: but it appeared to be a 
 season of divine power in the whole assembly: so 
 that most were in some measure, affected. And one 
 aged man in particular,, lately awakened, was now 
 brought under deep and pressing concern, and was 
 earnestly inquisitive how he might find Jesus Christ. 
 God seems still to vouchsafe the influence of his 
 blessed Spirit, in all our meetings for divine worship. 
 
 "30. 1 explained the story of the rich man and 
 Lazarus, Luke xvi, 19. The word made powerful 
 impressions upon many, especially while 1 discoursed 
 of the blessedness of Lazarus in Abraham s bosom. 
 This, I could perceive affected them much more than 
 what I spoke of the rich man s torments. And thus it 
 has been usually with them. They have appeared 
 much more affected with the comfortable than the 
 dreadful truths of God s word. And that which has 
 distressed many of them under convictions is, that 
 they wanted, and could not obtain, the happiness of 
 
01? JJRAINEKO. 147 
 
 the godly: they have often appeared to be more af- 
 t ected with tkis 9 than with the terrors of hell. But 
 whatever he the means of their awakening, it is plain 
 numbers are made deeply sensible of their sin and 
 misery; the wickedness of their own hearts; their 
 utter inability to help themselves, or come to Christ 
 for help, without divine assistance. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Dec. 1. I gave them particular 
 cautions and directions relating to their conduct in 
 divers respects. And pressed them to watchfulness 
 in all their deportment, seeing they were encom 
 passed with those that waited for ihdr halting, and 
 who stood ready to draw them into temptations of 
 every kind, and then to expose religion on their ac 
 count. 
 
 "9. I spent most of the day in procuring provis 
 ions, in order to my setting up house-keeping among 
 the Indians. 
 
 "10. 1 was engaged in the same business as yester 
 day. Towards night I got into my own house.-* 
 
 "12. I preached from the parable of the ten vir 
 gins. The divine power seemed to attend this dis 
 course, in which I was favored with uncommon free 
 dom and plainness of address, and enabled to open 
 divine truths in a manner beyond myself. 
 
 "There appeared in many an affectionate concern 
 for their souls; and it was refreshing to see them 
 melted into tears; some with a sense of divine love, 
 and some for want of it. 
 
 "Lord s-day, 15. I preached to the Indians from 
 Luke xiii, 24, 28. Divine truths fell with weight 
 upon the audience. Mear night I discoursed to 
 them again from Matt, xxv, 31 46. At which 
 season also the word appeared to be accompanied 
 with divine influence, and made powerful impres 
 sions upon the assembly in general, as well as upon 
 divers persons in a very particular manner. This 
 
 This is the third house that he built to dwell in by himself among 
 the Indians: the first at Kaunaumeek, in the county of \lbany, the 
 second at the forks of Delaware, iu Pennsylvania, and now this at 
 ros\veeksung, in New Jersey. 
 
148 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 was an amazing season of grace! The word of the 
 Lord 4 \vas quick and powerful, sharper than any 
 two-edged sword. The assembly was deeply 
 wrought upon; and the impressions made by the 
 word of God appeared solid and rational, worthy of 
 the solemn truths by means of which Ihey were pro 
 duced. 
 
 "Oli how did the hearts of the hearers seem to bow 
 under the weight of divine truth! And how evident 
 did it now appear that they received and felt them; 
 <not as the word of man; but as the word of God! 
 
 "16. There was much affection and concern in 
 the assembly; especially one woman appeared in 
 great distress. She was brought to such an agony 
 in seeking after Christ, that the sweat ran off her 
 face for a considerable time, although the evening 
 was very cold; and her bitter cries were the most 
 affecting indication of the inward anguish of her 
 heart. 
 
 "31. My people having now attained to a consid 
 erable degree of knowledge in the principles of 
 Christianity, I thought it proper to set up a catechet 
 ical lecture; and this evening attempted something 
 in that form; proposing questions to them, receiving 
 their answers, and then explaining as appeared 
 proper upon each question. After \\hich, 1 endeav 
 ored to make some practical improvement of the 
 whole. They were able, readily and rationally to 
 answer many important questions: so that I found 
 their knowledge to exceed my expectations. In the 
 improvement of my discourse, when 1 came to open 
 the blessedness of those who have so great and glori 
 ous a God, as had been spoken of, for their ever 
 lasting friend and portion, sundry were much affect 
 ed; and especially when I exhorted them to be re 
 conciled to God, through his dear Son, and thus to 
 secure an interest in his everlasting favor. 
 
 "Lord s-day, 22. 1 discoursed upon the story of 
 the young man in the Gospel, Matt, ix, 16. God 
 made it a seasonable word to some souls. After my 
 labors with the India r s, I spent some time in writing, 
 
LIFE OF BRAIXERD. 149 
 
 and was much wearied with the labors of the day. 
 1 am conscious that my labors arc as great and con 
 stant as my nature will bear, and that ordinarily I 
 go the extent of my strength; so that 1 do all 1 can; 
 but the misery is, 1 do not labor with that heavenly 
 temper, that single eye to the glory of God, that 1 
 long for. 
 
 "There were sundry persons of the Indians newly 
 come here, who had frequently lived among quakers, 
 and being more civilized than the generality of the 
 Indians, they had imbibed some of the quakers 
 principles, especially this; that if men would but 
 live according to the dictates of their own consciences 
 (or the light witldnj there is no doubt of their salva 
 tion. These persons I found much worse to deal \vhh 
 than those who are wholly under Pagan darkness, 
 who make no pretences to knowledge in Christianity, 
 nor have any self-righteous foundation to stand upon. 
 However, they all, except one, appeared now con 
 vinced, that this was not sufficient to salvation, since 
 Christ himself had declared it so in the case of the 
 young man. And seemed in some measure, con 
 cerned to obtain that change of heart which I had 
 been laboring to show them the necessity of. 
 
 "This was likewise a season of comfort to some 
 souls, and in particular to one, who never before ob 
 tained any settled comfort. When I came to in 
 quire of her how she got relief from the distresses 
 she had lately been under, she answered in broken 
 English,-* <me try, me try, save myself, last my 
 strength be all gone (meaning her ability to save 
 herself,) could not me stir bit further. Den last me 
 forced let Jesus Christ alone, send me hell if he 
 please. I said but you was not willing to go to hell 
 was you? She replied,f < Could not me help it. My 
 heart he would be wicked for all. Could not me 
 
 * In proper English thus, 1 tried and tried to save myself, till at 
 last my strength was all gone, and I could not stir any further. Then 
 at last I was forced to let Jesus Christ alone to send me to hell if he 
 pleased 
 
 j In plain English thus, I could not help it. My heart would be 
 wicked for all 1 could do. I could not make it good. 
 
150 TLIFE OF BRAIXERT), 
 
 make him good: I asked her, How she got out o,f 
 this case? bhc answered stiJl in the same broken 
 language;* By, by, my heart he glad desperately. 
 1 asked lier why her heart was glad? She replied, 
 Glad us y heart Jesus Christ do what you please \\ith 
 me. Den me tink, glad my heart Jesus Christ send 
 me to hell. Did not me tare where he put me, me 
 Jove him for all. 
 
 "And she could not readily he convinced hut that 
 she was willing to go to hell," if Christ was pleased 
 to send her there. Though the truth evidently uas, 
 her will was so swallowed up in the divine will: that 
 she could not frame any hell in her imagination that 
 would be dreadful, provided it was the will of God 
 to send her to it. 
 
 "5. The Indians having been used, upon 
 Christmas-days, to drink and revel among the white 
 people, I thought proper to call them together, and 
 discourse to them upon divine tilings; which I ac 
 cordingly did from the parable of the barren fig- 
 tree, Luke xiii, 6. The power of God appeared in 
 the assembly, by awakening several stupid creatures 
 that were scarce ever moved with any concern be 
 fore. The impressions made upon the assembly in 
 general seemed not superficial, but deep and heart- 
 affecting. how ready did they appear to comply 
 with every thing they were convinced was their 
 duty! God \\as in the midst of us of a truth, bowing 
 and melting stubborn hearts! How many tears and 
 sobs were then to be seen and heard among us! 
 What liveliness and strict attention! What eager 
 ness and intenseness of mind! They seemed to 
 watch and wait for the dropping of God s word, as 
 the thirsty earth for the former and latter rain. 
 
 "26. This evening I was visited by a person un 
 der great spiritual exercise. She was a woman of 
 
 * By and by my heart was exceeding glad. My heart was glad 
 that Jesus Christ would do with me what he pleased. "Then I thought 
 my heart would be glad although Christ should send me to hell. I did 
 not care where he put we, I skould love him for all (i. e,) de what he 
 would with iae. 
 
LIFE OF B-RAIJVERD. 15 
 
 more than four-score years old, and appeared to be 
 much broken and very childish through age, so that 
 it seemed impossible for man to instil into her mind 
 any notions of divine things. She was led by the 
 hand into my house, and appeared in extreme an 
 guish. I asked, what ailed her? She answered 
 lhat her heart was distressed, and she feared she 
 should never find Christ. I asked, when she began 
 to be concerned? She answered to this effect that 
 she had heard me preach many times, but never 
 felt in her heart till the last Sabbath; and then it 
 came, she said, all one as if a needle had been 
 tli rust into her heart: since which time she had no 
 rest day or night. She added, that on the evening 
 before Christmas, a number of Indians being to 
 gether at the house where she was. and discoursing 
 about Christ, their talk pricked her heart, so that she 
 could not sit up, but fell down on her bed; at which 
 time she went away (as she expressed it,) and fdfc 
 as if she dreamed, and yet is confident she did not 
 dream. When she was thus gone, she saw two 
 paths; one appeared very broad and crooked, and 
 that turned to the left hand; the other appeared 
 straight and very narrow, and that went up the hill 
 to the right hand. She travelled, she said, for somtf 
 time up the narrow right hand path, till at length, 
 something seemed to obstruct her journey. She 
 sometimes called it darkness, and sometimes seemed 
 to compare it to a block or bar. She then remem 
 bered, she says, what she h.id heard me say about 
 striving to enter in at the strait gate (although she 
 took little notice of it at the time,) and thought she 
 would climb over this bar. But just as she was 
 thinking of this, she came back again, as she termed 
 it, meaning that she came to herself; whereupon her 
 soul was extremely distressed, apprehending she had 
 now turned back and forsaken Christ, and that 
 there was therefore no hope of mercy for her. 
 
 1 then proposed to her the provision made in the 
 Gospel for the salvation of sinners, and the ability 
 aud willingness of Christ <to save to th uttermost 
 
152 1IFE OF URAINERD. 
 
 all (old as well as young) that come to him.* 
 To which she seemed to give a hearty assent. But 
 instantly replied, <Ay, hut 1 cannot come; my wick 
 ed heart will not come to Christ; I do not know how 
 to come/ And this she spoke in anguish of spirit, 
 striking her breast, with tears in her eyes, and with 
 such earnestness in her looks as was indeed affecting. 
 
 "She seemed to be really convinced of her sin 
 and misery, and her need of a change of heart; and 
 her concern is abiding and constant. So that noth 
 ing appears hut that this exercise may have a sav 
 ing issue. And indeed there is ground to hope for 
 it, seeing she is solicitous to obtain an interest in 
 Christ, that her heart (as she expresses it) prays 
 day and night. 
 
 "Dec. 28. I discoursed to my people in the 
 catechetical method I lately entered upon. And in 
 the improvement of my discourse, wherein I was 
 comparing man s present with his primitive state; 
 and pressing sinners to take a vie\v of their deplor 
 able circumstances without Chri*t$ as also to strive 
 that they may obtain an interest in hint; the Lord 
 granted a remarkable influence of his blessed Spirit, 
 and there was a great concern in the assembly: many 
 were melted into tears, and the impressions made 
 upon them seemed deep and heart affecting. And in 
 particular, there were two or three persons who ap 
 peared to be reduced almost to extremity; being 
 convinced of the impossibility of helping themselves, 
 or mending their own hearis; and upon the point 
 of giving up all hope in themselves* and venturing 
 upon Christ as naked, helpless, and undone. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Dec. 29 1 preached from John iii, 
 15. A number of white people were present, as 
 is usual on the Sabbath. The discourse seemed to 
 have a silent, but deep and piercing influence upon 
 the audience. Many wept and sobbed affrctioiiately. 
 And there were some tears among the white people, 
 as well as the Indians. Some could nor rf frwin from 
 crying out. But the impressions mad upon their 
 hearts, appeared chiefly by the extraordinary earn- 
 
LIFE OF BRAIKERD. 15S 
 
 estness of their attention, and their heavy sighs and 
 tears. 
 
 "After public service was over, I went to my 
 house, proposing to preach again after a short inter 
 mission. But they soon came in one after another, 
 with tears in their eyes, to know What they should 
 do to be saved. And the dh ine Spirit in such a 
 manner set home upon their hearts what I spoke to 
 them, that the house was soon filled with cries and 
 groans. They all flocked together upon this occa 
 sion, and those whom 1 had reason to think in a 
 Christless state, were almost universally seized with 
 concern for their souls. 
 
 "It was an amazing season of power among them, 
 and seemed as if God had bowed the heavens* and 
 come down. So astonishingly prevalent was the 
 operation upon old as well as young, that it seemed 
 as if God was about to convert all the world. And I 
 was ready to think then, that 1 should never again 
 despair of the conversion of any man or woman liv 
 ing. 
 
 "It is impossible to give a just description of the 
 appearance of things at this season. A number 
 were rejoicing that God had not taken away the in 
 fluence of his blessed Spirit. Refreshed to see so 
 many striving to enter in at the strait gate; and 
 animated with such concern for them, that they 
 wanted to push them forward, as some of them ex 
 pressed it. At the same time numbers, both of 
 men and women, old and young, might be seen in 
 tears, and some in anguish of spirit, appearing in 
 their countenances, like condemned malefactors, go 
 ing towards the place of execution, so that there 
 seemed a lively emblem of the solemn day of ac 
 counts; a mixture of heaven and hell, of joy un 
 speakable, and anguish inexpressible. 
 
 "The concern was such, that I could not pretend 
 to have any formal religious exercises among them; 
 but spent the time in discoursing to one and another, 
 sometimes all together, and concluded with prayer. 
 Such were their circumstances, that I could scarce 
 14 
 
154 LIFE OP BRAINERD. 
 
 liave half an hour s rest from speaking, from about 
 half an hour before twelve o clock, (at which time 
 1 began public worship) until past seven at night. 
 
 "Dec. 30. ) was visited by four or five young 
 persons under concern for their souls, most of whom 
 were very lately awakened. They wept much while 
 I discoursed to them, and endeavored to press upon 
 them the necessity ofjlying to Christ, without delay, 
 for salvation. 
 
 "31. 1 spent some hours this day in visiting my 
 people from house to house: and scarce left a house 
 without leaving some or other of its inhabitants in 
 tears, solicitously engaged to obtain an interest in 
 Christ. 
 
 "The Indians are now gathered together from 
 all quarters to this place, and have built them little 
 cottages so that more than twenty families live with 
 in a quarter of a mile of me. A very convenient 
 situation in regard of both public and private in 
 struction. 
 
 "January 1, 1745. I am this day beginning a 
 new year: and God has carried me through numer 
 ous trials and labors in the past. He has amazingly 
 supported my feeble frame; for having obtained 
 help of God, I continue to this day. O that I might 
 live nearer to God, this year than I did the last! 
 The business that I have been enabled to go through 
 1 know has been as great as nature could bear up 
 under, and what would have sunk me quite, without 
 special support But alas! though I have done the 
 labors, and endured the trials, with what spirit have 
 I done the one, and borne the other? How cold has 
 my heart often been! and how little have I eyed the 
 glory of Godl I have found, that I could have no 
 peace without filling up all my time with labors: 
 and thus necessity has been laid upon me; yea, 
 in that respect, I have loved to labor: but I could 
 not sensibly labor for God, as I would have done. 
 May 1 for the future be enabled more sensibly to 
 make the glory of God my all. 
 
LIFE OF BUAINERD. 155 
 
 "This day I spent some considerable time in visit 
 ing my people again, and found scarce one but what 
 was under some serious impressions. 
 
 "2. I visited some persons newly come among 
 us, who had scarce ever heard any thing of Chris 
 tianity (but the name.) I endeavored to instruct 
 them in the first principles of religion, in the most 
 easy and familiar manner I could. 
 
 There are strangers almost continually dropping 
 in, so that I have occasion repeatedly to open and 
 inculcate the first principles of Christianity. 
 
 "Near night I proposed to have proceeded in my 
 usual method of catechising. But while we were 
 engaged in the first prayer, the power of God came 
 upon the assembly in so remarkable a manner and 
 so many appeared under present concern, that I 
 thought it much more expedient to insist upon the 
 plentiful provision made for the redemption of per 
 ishing sinners, arid to press them to a speedy accept 
 ance of the great salvation, than to ask them ques 
 tions about doctrinal points. 
 
 "I baptized two persons this day; one adult and 
 one child. 
 
 "The woman has discovered an heavenly frame of 
 mind, from her first reception of comfort. Ono 
 morning in particular she came to see me, discover 
 ing an unusual joy in her countenance; and when I 
 inquired the reason of it, she replied, <that God had 
 made her feel that it was right for him to do as he 
 pleased with all things. She moreover inquired 
 whether I was not sent to preach to the Indians, by 
 some good people a great way off. I replied, <Yes, 
 by the good people in Scotland. She answered, 
 that her heart loved those good people so, the even 
 ing before, that she could scarce help praying for 
 them all night, her heart would go to God for 
 them. 
 
 "Jan. 8. My heart was drawn out after God; 
 my soul was refreshed and quickened: 1 had great 
 hopes of the ingathering of precious souls to Christ; 
 not only among my own people but others also. I 
 
156 LIFE OF BRAINJERD. 
 
 was sweetly resigned and composed under my bodily 
 weakness; and was willing to live or die; and desir 
 ous to labor for God to the utmost of my strength. 
 
 **Jan. 10. My soul was in a calm, composed 
 frame, and filled with love to all the world: Chris 
 tian simplicity and tenderness seemed to prevail and 
 reign \\ith me. Near night, 1 visited a serious 
 baptist minister, and had some agreeable conversa 
 tion with him. 
 
 U 13. I was visited by divers persons under 
 deep concern: one of whom was newly awakened. 
 It is a most agreeable work to treat with souls who 
 are solicitously inquiring What they should do to be 
 saved. And as we are never to be weary in well 
 doing, so the obligation is peculiarly strong when 
 the work is so lively. And yet my health is so much 
 impaired, and my spirits so wasted with my labors, 
 and solitary manner of living, (there being no hu 
 man creature in the house with me,) that their re 
 peated and almost incessant applications to me for 
 help and direction, are sometimes exceedingly bur 
 densome. And what contributes much toward this 
 difficulty is, that I am obliged to spend much time 
 in communicating a little matter to them; there 
 being often many things necessary to be premised, 
 before 1 can speak directly to what I principally 
 aimed atf which things would readily be taken for 
 granted, where there was a competency of knowl 
 edge. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Jan. 19. I catechised in my ordina 
 ry method. Numbers were much affected. Convic 
 tions powerfully revived. Divers of the Christians 
 refreshed and strengthened. And one weary heavy- 
 laden soul, I have reason to hope was brought to 
 true rest and solid comfort in Christ. 
 
 * l He told me, he had often heard me say, that 
 persons must see and feel themselves helpless and 
 undone; that they must give up all hope of saving 
 themselves by their own doings, in order to their 
 coming to Christ for salvation. And he had long 
 been striving after this; supposing this would be an 
 
OF BIUiNERD. 157 
 
 excellent frame of mind: that God would have re 
 spect to this frame, and bestow eternal life upon 
 him. But when he came to feel himself in this 
 helpless undone condition, he found it quite contrary 
 to all his thoughts: so that it was not the same, nor 
 indeed any thing like the frame he had been seeking 
 after. Instead of its being & good frame of mind, he 
 now found nothing but badness in himself, and saw 
 it was for ever impossible for him to make himself 
 any better. He was amazed he had never before 
 seen that it was utterly impossible for him, by all his 
 contrivances and endeavors, to do any thing that way. 
 Instead of imagining that God would be pleased 
 with him for the sake of this frame of mind, he saw 
 clearly it would be just with God to send him to 
 eternal misery; and that there was no goodness in 
 what he then felt; for he could not help seeing, that 
 he was naked, sinful, and miserable, and there was 
 nothing in such a sight to deserve God s love or pity. 
 
 "In this frame of mind he came to public worship 
 this evening, and while I was inviting sinners to 
 come to Christ naked and empty, without any good 
 ness of their own to recommend them to his accept 
 ance; he thought, that he had often tried to come and 
 give up his heart to Christy and he used to hope, 
 that some time or other he should be able to do so. 
 JBut now he was convinced he conld not, and it seem 
 ed utterly vain for him ever to try any more: nor did 
 he now hope for a better opportunity hereafter, as 
 he had formerly done, because he saw, and was full/ 
 convinced, his own strength would for ever fail. 
 
 "While he was musing in this manner, he saw, he 
 said, with his heart, (which is a common phrase 
 among them) something that was unspeakably good 
 and lovely, and what he had never seen before; and 
 this stole away his heart whether he would or no. 
 lie did not, he said, know what it was he saw. He 
 did not say, this is Jesus Christ; but it was such 
 glory and beauty as he never saw before. He did 
 not now give away his heart so as he had formerly 
 attempted to do, but it went away of itself after that 
 
158 LIFE OF BBAINEKIf, 
 
 glory he then discovered. He used to try to make a 
 bargain with Christ, to give up his heart to him, that 
 he might have eternal life for it. But now he 
 thought nothing about himself, but his mind was 
 wholly taken up with the unspeakable excellency of 
 what he then beheld. 
 
 * After some time he was wonderfully pleased 
 with the way of salvation by Christ; so that it 
 seemed unspeakably better to be saved altogether by 
 the mere free grace of God in Christ, than to have 
 any hand in saving himself. And the consequence 
 is, that he appears to retain a relish of divine things, 
 and to maintain a life of true religion. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Jan. 6. After public worship, I 
 was in a sweet and solemn frame of mind, thankful 
 to God that he had made me in some measure faith 
 ful in addressing precious souls, but grieved that i 
 liad been no more fervent in my work; and tenderly 
 affected towards all the world, longing that every 
 sinner might be saved; and could not have entertain 
 ed any bitterness towards the worst enemy living. 
 In the evening, I rode to Elizabethtown: while riding 
 1 was almost constantly engaged in lifting up my 
 heart to God, lest I should lose that sweet heavenly 
 solemnity and composure of soul I enjoyed. After 
 wards, 1 was pleased to think, that God reigneth: 
 and thought, I could never be uneasy with any of his 
 dispensations; but must be entirely satisfied what 
 ever trials lie should cause me or his church to en 
 counter. I never felt more divine serenity and com 
 posure of mind: I could freely have left the dearest 
 earthly friend, for the society of angels and spirits 
 of just men made perfect: my affections soared 
 aloft to the blessed Author of every dear enjoyment; 
 I viewed the emptiness and unsatisfactory nature 
 of the most desirable earthly objects, any further 
 than God has seen in them: and longed for a life of 
 spirituality and inward purity; without which I saw 
 there could be no true pleasure. 
 
 "28. The Indians in these parts having in times 
 past run themselves in debt by their excessive drink- 
 
LIFE OF BRALtfERD. 159 
 
 ing; and some having taken the advantages of them 
 and arrested sundry of them, whereby it was sup 
 posed their hunting lands might speedily he taken 
 from them; I being sensible that they could not 
 subsist together in these parts, if these Jands should 
 drop out of their hands, thought it my duty to use 
 my utmost endeavors to prevent it. And having ac 
 quainted the gentlemen concerned in this mission 
 with the affair, they thought it proper to expend the 
 money they had been collecting for the religious in 
 terest of the Indians (at least a part of it,) for the 
 discharging of their debts, and securing these lands. 
 And having received orders from them, I answered, 
 in behalf of the Indians, eighty-two pounds five 
 shillings, New Jersey currency. 
 
 "31. This day the person 1 had engaged for a 
 schoolmaster among the Indians, arrived among us, 
 and was heartily welcomed by my people. Where 
 upon 1 distributed several dozen of primers, among 
 the children and young people. 
 
 "February 1. My schoolmaster entered upon his 
 business among the Indians. lie has generally 
 about thirty children and young persons in his 
 school in the day time, and about fifteen married 
 people in his evening-school. The number of the 
 latter sort of persons being less than it would be, if 
 they could be more constant at home. 
 
 "In the evening I catechised in my usual method. 
 Towards the close of my discourse, a surprising 
 power seemed to attend the word. One man consid 
 erably in years, who had been a remarkable drunk 
 ard, a conjurer and murderer, that was awakened 
 some months before, was now brought to great ex 
 tremity, so that he trembled for hours together, and 
 apprehended himself just dropping into hell, without 
 any power to rescue or relieve himself. Divers 
 others appeared under great concern, as well as he, 
 and solicitous to obtain a saving change." 
 
 Feb. 10. He set out on a journey to the Forks 
 of Delaware, to visit the Indians there, lie per 
 formed the journey under great weakness, and some- 
 
160 XIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 times was exorcised with much pain: he arrived at 
 his own house at the Forks, on Friday. 
 
 l baptized three persons, two adults, and one 
 child. There was a considerable melting in the as 
 sembly, while 1 was administering the ordinance. 
 
 "God has been pleased 1<> own and bless the ad 
 ministration of this, as well as of his other ordinan 
 ces, among the Indians. There are some here that 
 have been powerfully awakened at seeing others bap 
 tized. And some that have obtained relief and com 
 fort, just in the season when this ordinance has been 
 administered. 
 
 "Towards night I catechised. God made this a 
 powerful season. There were many affected. For 
 mer convictions were powerfully revived. There 
 was likewise one, who had been a vile drunkard, re 
 markably awakened-. He appeared to be in great 
 anguish of soul, wept and trembled, and continued so 
 to do till near midnight. There was also a poor 
 heavy-laden soul, who had been long under spiritual 
 distress, that was now brought to a comfortable 
 calm, and told me, she now saw and felt it was right 
 God should do with her as he pleased. And added, 
 that the heavy burden she had laid under, was now 
 removed: that she felt she never could do any thing 
 to save herself, but must perish for ever if Christ 
 did not do all for her. But Christ could save her, 
 though she could do nothing to save herself. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Feb. 16. Knowing that divers of the 
 Indians in those parts were obstinately set against 
 Christianity, I thought it proper to have some of my 
 people from Croswecksung with me, in order to con 
 verse with them: hoping it might be a means to con 
 vince them of the truth, to hear and see some of 
 their own nation discoursing of divine things, and 
 manifesting earnest desires that others might be 
 brought out of heathenish darkness, as themselves 
 were. 
 
 "And having taken half a dozen of the most serious 
 and knowing persons, 1 this day met with them and 
 the Indians of this place (sundry of whom could riot 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 161 
 
 have been prevailed upon to attend the meeting, had 
 it not been tor these Indians that accompanied me) 
 and preached to them. Some of them \vlio had, in 
 times past, been extremely averse to Christianity, 
 now behaved soberly; though others laughed and 
 mocked. However the word of God i eii with such 
 weight and power that several seemed to be stunned, 
 and expressed a willingness to hear me again of 
 these matters. 
 
 "After public worship I spent some time to con 
 vince those that mocked, of the truth and importance 
 of what 1 had been insisting upon: and 1 had reason 
 to think, that my endeavors took effect upon one of 
 the worst of them. 
 
 "Those few Indians then present, who used to be 
 my hearers in these parts (some having removed from 
 thence to Crosweeksung,) seemed glad to see me 
 again, although they had been so much attacked by 
 some of the opposing Pagans, that they were almost 
 afraid to manifest their friendship. 
 
 "In the evening I was in a composed frame of 
 mind. It was exceedingly refreshing to think, that 
 God had been with me, affording me some good meas 
 ure of assistance. I found freedom in prayer for 
 my dear friends and acquaintance. Blessed be the 
 name of the Lord that ever I am enabled to do any 
 thing for his interest and kingdom. Blessed be 
 God who enables me to be faithful. 1 enjoyed more 
 resolution for God, and more refreshment of spirit, 
 than 1 have been favored with for many weeks 
 past. 
 
 "Feb. 17. I discoursed from Acts viii, 5 8, A 
 divine influence seemed to attend the word. Sundry 
 of the Indiana here appeared to be somewhat awaken 
 ed, and manifested a concern by their earnest atten 
 tion, tears, and sobs. My people from Crosweek 
 sung, continued with them day and night, repeating 
 and inculcating the truths 1 had taught them: and 
 sometimes prayed and sung psalms among them; 
 discoursing with each other, in their hearing, of the 
 great things God had done for them, and for the In- 
 
162 LlFfi OE BRAINERJ. 
 
 liians from whence they came: which seemed to take 
 more effect upon them, than when they directed their 
 discourses immediately to them. 
 
 1 *18. I preached to an assembly of Irish people, 
 near fifteen miles distant from the Indians. 
 
 "19. 1 preached to the Indians again, after hav 
 ing spent a considerable time in conversing with 
 them privately. There appeared a great solemnity, 
 and some concern and affection among the Indians 
 belonging to these parts, as well as a sweet melting 
 among those who came with me. Divers of the In 
 dians here seemed to have their prejudices removed, 
 and appeared well disposed to hear the word of God. 
 
 "20. 1 preached to a small assembly of High Dutch 
 people, who had seldom heard the Gospel, and were 
 (some of them at least) very ignorant; but divers of 
 them have lately been put upon an inquiry after the 
 way of salvation. They gave wonderful attention, and 
 some of them were much affected, and afterwards 
 said (as 1 was informed) that they never had been 
 so much enlightened about the way of salvation in 
 their whole lives before. They requested me to tar 
 ry with them, or come again and preach to them. 
 And it grieved me that I could not comply with their 
 request, for I could not but be affected with their cir 
 cumstances; they being as <sheep not having a shep 
 herd. 
 
 "21. I preached to a number of people, many of 
 them Low Dutch. Sundry of the forementioried 
 High Dutch attended the sermon though eight or ten 
 miles distant from their houses Divers of the In 
 dians also belonging to these parts, came of their own 
 accord (with my people from Crosw r eeksung) to the 
 meeting: two in particular, who on the last Sabbath 
 opposed and ridiculed Christianity. 
 
 "22. I preached to the Indians. They seemed 
 more free from prejudice, and more cordial to 
 Christianity than before, arid some appeared much 
 affected. 
 
 "My spirits were supported, though my bodily 
 strength was much wasted. O that God would be 
 gracious to the souls of these poor Indians. 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 1G3 
 
 < God has been very gracious to me this week: he 
 has enabled me to preach every day: and has given 
 me some assistance, and an encouraging prospect of 
 success in almost every sermon. Hlessed be his 
 name. Divers of the white people have been awak 
 ened this week; sundry of the Indians much cured of 
 the prejudices and jealousies they had conceived 
 against Christianity, and some seemed to be really 
 awakened " 
 
 The next day he left the Forks of Delaware, to 
 return to Croswceksung; and preached by the way 
 every day, excepting one; and was several times 
 greatly assisted; he had much inward comfort, and 
 earnest longings to fill up his time with the service 
 of God. 
 
 "Lord s-day, March 2. Some of my people \\ ho 
 went up to the Forks of Delaware with me, being 
 now returned, were accompanied by two of the In 
 dians belonging to the Forks, who had promised me 
 a speedy visit. They can scarce go into a house 
 now, but they will meet with Christian conver 
 sation, whereby they may be both instructed and 
 awakened, 
 
 <*i know of no assembly of Christians, where 
 there seems to be so much of the presence of God, 
 where brotherly love so much prevails, as in my own 
 congregation: although not more than nine months 
 ago they were worshipping devils and dumb idols, 
 under the power of Pagan darkness and superstition. 
 Amazing change! effected by nothing less than di 
 vine power and grace! 
 
 "Their present situation is so compact and com 
 modious, that they are quickly called together with 
 only the sound of a conk-shell, (a sht-11 like that of a 
 periwinkle) so that they have frequent opportunities 
 of attending religious exercises publicly: which 
 seems to be a great means, under God, of keeping 
 alive their impressions of divine things. 
 
 "March 6. I walked alone in the evening, and 
 enjoyed comfort in prayer, beyond what I have of 
 late enjoyed: my soul rejoiced in my pilgrimage state. 
 
164 LIFE OF BRAIXERD. 
 
 I was delighted with the thought of laboring and en 
 during hardness fur God: and confided in God that he 
 never would leave me nor forsake me, to the end of 
 my race. Oh, may I obtain mercy of God to be faith 
 ful, to my dying moment! 
 
 *3. 1 catechised in the evening. My people an 
 swered the questions proposed to them well. I can 
 perceive their knowledge in religion increases daily. 
 And what is still more desirable, the divine influence 
 among them, appears still to continue. The divine 
 presence seemed to be in the assembly this evening. 
 Some who were Christians indeed, were melted with 
 a sense of the divine goodness, and their own barren 
 ness and ingratitude. Convictions also appeared to 
 revive in several; so it might justly be called an 
 evening of power. 
 
 "LordVday, March 9. I preached from Luke x, 
 58 42. The word of God was attended with ener 
 gy. Numbers were affected and concerned to ob 
 tain the one thing needful. Several that have given 
 good evidences of being truly gracious, were much 
 affected with a sense of their want of spirituality; 
 and saw the need they stood in of growing in grace. 
 And most that had had any impression of divine 
 things in times past, now felt those impressions re 
 vived 
 
 "In the afternoon. I proposed to have catechised 
 in my usual method. But while we were engaged in 
 the first prayer, in the Indian language, (as usual) a 
 great part of the assembly was so much moved, that 
 1 thought it proper to omit the questions, and insist 
 upon the most practical truths. 
 
 "There appeared to be a powerful influence in the con - 
 gregatiori. Those, truly pious, were so deeply affected 
 with a sense of their own barrenness and their own un 
 worthy treatment of their blessed Redeemer, that they 
 looked On him as pierced by themselves, and mourned, 
 yea, some of them were inbittcrness as for a first -born. 
 Some poor awakened sinners also appeared to be in 
 anguish of soul to obtain an interest in Christ. So 
 that there was a great mourning in the assembly: 
 
I/IFE OF BRAINERD. 165 
 
 many heavy groans and tears! and one or two per 
 sons newly come among us, were considerably 
 awakened. 
 
 After public worship many came to my house, 
 where we sung and discoursed; and the presence of 
 God sec;iied here also to be in the midst of us. 
 
 "While we were singing, there was one (the wo 
 man mentioned in my journal of February 9.) who I 
 may venture to STIV, was filled with joy unspeakable 
 and full of glory, and could not but burst forth in 
 prayer and praises to G<>d before us all, with many 
 tears, crying sometimes in English, and sometimes 
 in Indian, *O blessed Lord, do come, do come! O do 
 take me away, do let me die and go to Jesus Chris!! 
 J am afraid if 1 live I shall sin again! O do let me die 
 now! O dear Jesus, do come! I cannot stay, I cannot 
 stay! how can I live in this world! let me never 
 sin any more! In this cxtasy she continued some 
 time, uttering these and such like expressions inces 
 santly. 
 
 "When she had a little recovered, I asked her, if 
 Christ was now sweet to her soul? Whereupon, turn 
 ing to me with tears in her eyes, and with all the to 
 kens of deep humility, she said, l l have many times 
 heard you speak of the goodness and the sweetness 
 of Christ, that he was better than all the world. But 
 O! 1 knew nothing what you meant, I never believed 
 you! I never believed you! But now I know it is 
 true! I answered, and do you see enough in Christ 
 for the greatest of sinners? She replied, 4 enough, 
 enough! for all the sinners in the world, if they would 
 but come. And when I asked her, if she could not 
 tell them of the goodness of Christ: turning herself 
 about to some poor Christless souls who stood by, 
 and were much affected, she said, there is enough 
 in Christ for you, if you would but come! strive, 
 strive to give up your hearts to him! And upon 
 hearing something of the glory of heaven mentioned, 
 she again fell into the same cxtasy, repeating her 
 former expressions, <0 dear Lord, do let me go] 
 15 
 
11FE OF BRAIXERD. 
 
 V;hat shall I do, what shall 1 do; I want to go to 
 Christ! I cannot live! O do let me die! 
 
 "She continued in this sweet frame for more than 
 two hours, before she was well able to get home. 
 
 "I am sensible there may be great joys, where 
 there is no substantial evidence of there being well 
 grounded. But in the present case there seemed to 
 be no evidence wanting, in order to prove this joy to 
 be divine, either in regard of its preparatives, attend 
 ants, or consequents. 
 
 "Of all the persons I have seen, I scarce ever saw 
 cue more bowed and broken under convictions of sin 
 than this woman. Nor scarce any who seemed to 
 have a greater acquaintance with her own heart 
 than she had. She would frequently cumplnin to me 
 of the hardness and rebellion of her heart. That her 
 heart was riot willing to come to Christ for salvation, 
 but tried every where else for help. 
 
 "And as she was remarkably sensible of her stub 
 bornness under conviction, so she appeared to be no 
 less remarkably reconciled to divine grace, before 
 she obtained any relief. Since which she has con 
 stantly breathed the spirit and temper of a new 
 creature; crying after Christ, not through fear of 
 hell as before, but with strong desires after him as 
 her only satisfying portion: and as many times wept 
 bitterly, because she could not love him. When 1 
 have sometimes asked her, why she appeared so sor 
 rowful, and whether it was because she was afraid of 
 hell? She would answer, no I be not distressed about 
 that; but my heart is so wicked I cannot love Christ 
 and thereupon burst out into tears. But although 
 this has been the habitual frame of her mind for 
 several weeks, yet she never had any remarkable 
 comfort till this evening. 
 
 "The attendants of this comfort, were such as 
 abundantly discovered that it was truly joy in the 
 Holy Ghost. JV<m>, she viewed divine truths as 
 living realities; and could say <I know these things 
 are so, I feel they are true! now her soul was re 
 signed to the divine will in the most tender points,- so 
 
LIFE OF BUA1NERD. 167 
 
 that when I said to her, what if God should take 
 away your husband from you (who was then sick,) 
 how do you think you could bear that? She replied, 
 *He belongs to God, and not to me: he may do with 
 him just what ho pleases. Now she had the most 
 tender sense of the evil of sin, and discovered the 
 utmost aversion to it. Now she could freely trust 
 her all with God for time and eternity. An 1 when 
 1 queried with her, how she could be willing to die, 
 and leave her little infant, and whnt she thought 
 would become of it in case she should: She answered, 
 God will take care of it. It belongs to him, he will 
 take care of it. Now she appeared to have the most 
 humbling sense of her own un worthiness and inability 
 to preserve herself from sin, and to persevere in ho 
 liness. And 1 thought 1 had never seen such an ap 
 pearance of extasy and humility meeting in any one 
 person. 
 
 "The consequents of this joy are no less desirable 
 than its attendants. She since appears to be a most 
 tender, broken-hearted, affectionate, devout, and 
 humble Christian, as exemplary in life and conver 
 sation as any person in my congregation. 
 
 "March 10. Towards night the Indians met to 
 gether of their own accord, and sang, prayed, and 
 discoursed of divine things. At this time there was 
 much affection among them. Some appeared to be 
 molted with divine things, and some others seemed 
 much concerned for their souls. 
 
 "I baptized the woman mentioned in my journal 
 oflust Lord s-day; who appeared to be in a devout, 
 hu;rible, and excellent frame of mind. 
 
 u My house being thronged with people in the 
 evening, I spent the time with them, till my nature 
 was almost spent. They are so unwearied in relig 
 ious exercises, and insatiable in their thirstings after 
 Christian knowledge, that I can sometimes scarce 
 avoid laboring so, as greatly to exhaust my strength 
 and spirits. 
 
 "19. Some of the persons that went with me to 
 the Forks of Delaware, having been detained there 
 by the dangerous illness of one of their company 
 
168 LIFE OF ERAINEliD. 
 
 returned home this day. Whereupon my people met 
 together of their own accord, to give thanks to God 
 for his preserving goodness to those uho had been 
 absent from them (or several v\eeks, and recovering 
 mercy to him that had been sick. 
 
 Lord s-day, March 23. There being about 
 fifteen strangers, adult persons, come among us in 
 the week past; divers of whom had never been in any 
 religious meeting till now, I thought it proper to 
 discourse this day in a manner peculiarly suiled to 
 their circumstances, and accordingly attempted it from 
 llos. xiii, 9, in the forenoon, opening in the plainest 
 manner 1 could, man s apostacy and ruined state, 
 Sifter having spoken some things respecting the 
 being and perfections of God, and his creation of 
 man in a state of uprightness and happiness. In the 
 afternoon, I endeavored to open the glorious provis 
 ion God has made for the redemption of apostate 
 creatures. 
 
 "Near sun-set I felt an uncommon concern upon 
 my mind, e:*>pecially for the poor strangers, 1 visited 
 sundry houses, and discoursed with them severally, 
 but without much appearance of success, till 1 came 
 to a house where divers of the strangers were, and 
 there the word took effect, first upon some children; 
 then upon divers adult persons, that had been some 
 what awakened before, and afterwards upon several 
 of the pagan strangers. 
 
 "I continued my discourse till almost every one 
 in the house was mehed into tears, and divers v\ept 
 aloud, arid appeared earnestly conncerncd to obtain 
 an interest in Christ. Upon this numbers soon gath 
 ered from all the houses round about, and so thronged 
 the place, that w e were obliged to remov e to the house 
 where we usually meet for public worship. And the 
 congregation gathered immediately, and many ap 
 pearing remarkably affected, 1 discoursed some time 
 from Luke xix, 10, endeavoring to open the mercy, 
 compassion, and concern of Christ for lost, helpless, 
 and undone sinners. 
 
OF BRAINERD. 169 
 
 "There was much visible concern in the assembly; 
 and I doubt not but a divine influence accompanied 
 what was spoken to the hearts of many. There 
 Mere live or six of the strangers (men and women) 
 who appeared to be considerably awakened. And 
 in particular one very rugged young man, who 
 seemed as if nothing would move him, was now 
 brought to tremble like the jailor, and weep for a 
 long time. 
 
 The pagans that were awakened seemed at once 
 to put off their savage roughness, and became socia 
 ble, orderly, and humane. When they first came, 
 I exhorted my people to take pains with them (as 
 they had done with other strangers from time to time) 
 to instruct them in Christianity. But when some of 
 them attempted it, the strangers would soon rise up 
 and walk to other houses. Whereupon some of the 
 serious persons agreed to disperse themselves into 
 the several parts of the settlement. So that wherev 
 er the strangers went, they met with warm addresses 
 respecting their soul s concern. But now there was 
 no need of using policy in order to get an opportu 
 nity of conversing with them; for they were so 
 touched with a sense of their perishing state, as 
 tamely to yield to the closest addresses, respecting 
 their sin and misery, and their need of an acquaint 
 ance with the great Redeemer. 
 
 "24. I numbered the Indians, to see how many 
 souls God had gathered together here, since my 
 coming: and found there was now about an hundred 
 and thirty persons, old and young. And sundry of 
 those that are my stated hearers, perhaps fifteen or 
 twenty, were absent at this season. Whereas few 
 were together at my first coming into these parts, 
 the whole number not amounting to ten persons. 
 
 <<My people going out this day to clear some of 
 their lands, about fifteen miles distant, in order to 
 their settling there together, where they might attend 
 the public worship of God, have their children 
 schooled, and at the same time have a conveniency 
 for planting; I thought it proper to call them toeetfN 
 #15 
 
170 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 er, and show them the duty of laboring with faithful 
 ness and industry; and that they must not now *be 
 slothful in business, as they had ever been in their 
 pagan state. And having given them directions for 
 their work, and recommended them to God, 1 dis 
 missed them to their business. 
 
 "In the evening I read and expounded the sub 
 stance of the third chapter of the Acts. Numbers 
 seemed to melt under the word. When I asked them 
 afterwards, whether they did not now feel that their 
 hearts were wicked? One replied, *yfs, she felt it 
 now.* Although before she came here, she had 
 said, her heart was not wicked, and she never had 
 done anything that was bad in her life. And this 
 indeed seems to be the case with them universally, in 
 the pagan state. 
 
 "They seem to have no consciousness of sin and 
 guilt unless they can charge themselves with some 
 gross acts of sin. 
 
 "25. After the Indians were gone to their work, 
 1 got alone and poured out my soul to God, that he 
 would smile upon these feeble beginnings, and that 
 he w ? ou)d settle an Indian town that might be the 
 mountain of holiness; and found my soul much re 
 freshed and much enlarged in Zion s interest, and 
 lor numbers of dear friends in particular. My sink 
 ing spirits were revived, and I felt animated in the 
 service God has called me to. This was the dearest 
 hour 1 have enjoyed for many days, if not weeks. I 
 found an encouraging hope that something would be 
 done for God, and that God would use and help me 
 in his work. And oh, how sweet were the thoughts 
 of laboring for God when 1 had any hope that ever I 
 should be successful!" 
 
 The next day, his schoolmaster was taken skk 
 with a pleurisy; and he spent great part of the re 
 mainder of this week in attending to him: which 
 in his weak state was almost too much for him: he 
 being obliged constantly to wait upon him, all day, 
 from day to day, and to lie on the floor at night. His 
 
WFJB Or UHAINERD. 171 
 
 spirits sunk in a considerable degree, with his bodily 
 strength, under this burden. 
 
 "29. In the evening I catechised as usual. 
 Treating upon the benefits which believers receive 
 from Christ s death. The questions were answered 
 with great readiness and propriety. And those who 
 1 have reason to think, are the people of God, were 
 sweetly melted in general. There appeared such a 
 liveliness and vigor in their attendance upon the word 
 of God, and such eagerness to be made partakers of 
 the benefits then mentioned, that they seemed to be 
 not only looking for, but hastening to the coming 
 of the day of God. Divine truths seemed to dis 
 til upon the audience with a gentle, but melting effi 
 cacy, as the refreshing showers upon the new mown 
 grass. The assembly in general, as well as those 
 who appear to be truly religious, were affected with 
 an account of the blessedness of the godly at 
 death; and most then discovered an affectionate in 
 clination to cry, let me die the death of the righteous. 
 
 3l. 1 called my people together, as I had done 
 the Monday morning before, and discoursed to them 
 again on the necessity of their laboring industri 
 ously, in order to their living together and enjoying 
 the means of grace. And having engaged in solemn 
 prayer to God among them, I dismissed them to their 
 work. 
 
 "Numbers of them (both men and women) offered 
 themselves willingly to this service: and some 
 appeared affectionately concerned that, God might 
 go with them, and begin their little town for them; 
 that by his blessing it might be a place comfortable 
 for them, and theirs, in regard both of procuring the 
 necessaries of life, and of attending the worship of 
 God. 
 
 "April 2. I was exercised with a spiritless frame 
 of mind. Alas! my days pass away as the chaff ! it 
 is but little 1 do, or can do, that turns to any account; 
 and it is my constant misery and burden, that I am 
 so fruitless in the vineyard of the Lord. Oh that I 
 were spirit, that 1 might be active for God. This 
 
172 MFE OF BRAINEEB. 
 
 more than any thing else, makes me long, that this 
 corruptible might put on incorruption, and this mor 
 tal put on immortality. God deliver me from clogs, 
 fetters, and a body of death, that impede my service 
 for him. 
 
 "5. After public worship a number of my dear 
 Christian Indians came to my house; with whom 1 
 felt a sweet union in soul; my heart was knit to 
 them; and I cannot say, I have felt such a sweet and 
 fervent love to the brethren, for some time past: and 
 I saw in them appearances of the same love; this gave 
 me something of a view of the heavenly state; and 
 particularly that part of the happiness of heaven, 
 which consists in the communion of saints. 
 
 "Lord s-day, 6. I preached from Matt, vii, 21 
 23. There were considerable effects of the word 
 visible in the audience: and earnest attention, a great 
 solemnity, many tears and sighs. Divers were put 
 upon serious and close examination of their spiritual 
 state by hearing that not every one that saith to 
 Christ, Lord, Lord, shall enter into his kingdom. 
 And some of them expressed fears lest they had de 
 ceived themselves, and taken up a false hope, because 
 they had done so little of the will of his Father who 
 is in heaven. 
 
 "There was also one man brought under pressing 
 concern for his soul; which appeared more especially 
 after his retirement from public worship. And that 
 which, he says, gave him the greatest uneasiness, 
 was, not so much any particular sin, as that he had 
 never done the will of God at all, and so had no 
 claim to the kingdom of heaven. 
 
 "In the afternoon I opened to them the discipline 
 of Christ in his church, and the method in which 
 offenders are to be dealt with. At which time relig 
 ious people were much affected, especially when they 
 heard, that the offender continuing obstinate, must 
 finally be esteemed as an heathen man, that has no 
 part nor lot among God s visible people. This they 
 seemed to have the most awful apprehensions of: a 
 
LIFE OF BEAINERD. 173 
 
 state of heathenism, out of which they were so lately 
 brought, appearing very dreadful to them. 
 
 After public worship 1 visited sundry houses to 
 see how they spent the remainder of the sabbath, 
 and to treat with them solemnly on the great concerns 
 of their souls; and the Lord seemed to smile upon 
 my endeavors, and to make these particular addres 
 ses more effectual than my public discourses. 
 
 4t 7. 1 discoursed to my people from 1 Cor. xi, 
 23 26, and endeavored to open to them the institu 
 tion, nature, and ends of the Lord s supper, as well 
 as the qualifications and preparations necessary to 
 the right participation of that ordinance. Sundry 
 persons appeared much affected with the love of 
 Christ manifested in his making this provision for 
 the comfort of his people, at a season when himself 
 was just entering upon his sharpest sufferings." 
 
 On Tuesday, he went to a meeting of the 1 resby- 
 tery appointed at JElizabcthtown. In his way thither, 
 he enjoyed some sweet meditations; but after became 
 there, he was, as he expresses it, under an awful 
 gloom, that oppressed his mind. And this continued 
 till Saturday evening, when he began to have some 
 relief. lie spent the Sabbath at Staten island; where 
 he preached to an assembly of Dutch and English, 
 and enjoyed considerable refreshment and comfort, 
 both in public and private. In the evening he re 
 turned to Elizabethtown. 
 
 "14. My spirits were raised and refreshed, and 
 my mind composed, so that I was in a comfortable 
 frame of soul most of the day. in the evening my 
 head was clear, my mind serene; I enjoyed sweet 
 ness in secret prayer and meditation. O, how free, 
 how comfortable, cheerful and yet solemn, do I feel 
 when I am in a good measure freed from those damps 
 and melancholy glooms, that 1 often labor under! 
 
 "15. My soul longed for more spirituality: and it 
 was my burden, that 1 could do no more for God. 
 Oh, my barrenness is my daily affliction! Oh how 
 precious is time, and how it pains me, to see it slide 
 away, while I do so very little to any good purpose! 
 
174 LIFE OF BKAINEED. 
 
 Oh that God would make ine more fruitful and spir 
 itual, 
 
 "17. I enjoyed some comfort in prayer, some 
 freedom in meditation, and composure in my studies. 
 1 spent sometime in writing, in the forenoon, and in 
 the afternoon in conversation with several dear min 
 isters. In the evening 1 preached from i sai. Jxxiii, 
 28, <But it is good for me to draw near to God. God 
 helped me to feel the truth of my text, both in the 
 first prayer arid in sermon. I was enahled to pour 
 out my soul to God with great freedom, fervency, 
 and affection, and to speak with tenderness, and yet 
 with faithfulness: and divine truths seemed to fall 
 with weight and influence upon the hearers. My 
 heart was melted for the dear assembly, and 1 loved 
 every body in it; and scarce ever felt more love to 
 immortal souls in my life; my soul cried, 4 0h that 
 the j-dear creatures might be saved! that God 
 would have mercy on them! 
 
 "Lord s-day, 20.^ I enjoyed some freedom, and 
 exercise of faith and prayer, in the morning; espe 
 cially when I came to pray for Zion. I was free 
 from that gloomy discouragement, that so often op 
 presses my mind; and my soul rejoiced in the hopes 
 of Zion s prosperity, and the enlargement of the 
 dear kingdom of the great Redeemer. 
 
 "21. I was composed and comfortable most of 
 the day; free from those gloomy damps that I am 
 frequently exercised with: had freedom and comfort 
 in prayer, several times; especially for Zion s en 
 largement and prosperity. And oh, how refreshing 
 were these hopes to my soul! oh that the kingdom of 
 the dear Lord might come. 
 
 "April 22. My mind was remarkably free from 
 melancholy damps, and animated in my work. 1 
 found such fresh vigor and resolution in the service 
 of God, that the mountains seemed to become a plain 
 before me. Oh, blessed be God for an interval of 
 refreshment, and fervent resolution in my Lord s 
 
 " This day he entered into the twenty-ninth year of his ag. 
 
LIFE Or BRAINERD. 175 
 
 work! In the evening, my soul was refreshed in se 
 cret prayer, and my heart drawn out for divine bles 
 sings; especially for the church of God, and his in 
 terest among my own people, and for dear friends 
 in remote places. Oh that Zion might prosper, and 
 precious souls be brought home to God! 
 
 "April 25. Having appointed the next Lord s-day 
 for the administration of the Lord s supper, this day 
 was set apart for solemn fasting and prayer, to im 
 plore the blessing of God upon our design of nenew- 
 ing our covenant with him, and with one another; 
 and to intreat that his divine presence might be with 
 us in our designed approach to his table. 
 
 "The solemnity was observed, not only by those 
 who proposed to communicate, but by the whole con 
 gregation. In the former part of the day, I endeav 
 ored to open to my people the nature of a fast, and 
 to instruct them in the duties of such a solemnity. 
 In the afternoon, I insisted upon the special reasons 
 there were for our now engaging in these solemn 
 exercises; both in regard of the need we stood in 
 of divine assistance, in order to a due preparation 
 for the sacred ordinance: and in respect of the man 
 ifest decline of God s work here, as to the effectual 
 conviction and conversion of sinners, there having 
 been few of late deeply awakened out of a state of 
 security. 
 
 "The worship of God was attended with great 
 solemnity and reverence, with much tenderness and 
 many tears, by the truly religious; and there was 
 some appearance of divine power upon those who 
 had been awakened some time before. 
 
 "After repeated prayer and attendance upon the 
 word of God, I led them to a solemn renewal of their 
 baptismal covenant, wherein they had explicitly and 
 jpublicly given up themselves to God, Father, Son, 
 and Holy Ghost, avouching him to be their God; and 
 at the same time renouncing their heathenish van 
 ities, their idolatrous and superstitious practices, 
 and solemnly engaging to take the word of God for 
 4he rule of their lives, promising to walk together in 
 
176 LIFE OF BRAINETID. 
 
 love, to watch over themselves, and one another; to 
 lead lives of seriousness ami devotion, and to dis 
 charge the relative duties incumbent upon them. 
 
 This solemn transaction was attended with much 
 seriousness; and at the same time with the utirost 
 readiness and cheerfulness; and an union and har 
 mony of soul seemed to crown the whole. 
 
 "In the evening I catechised those that were de 
 signed to partake of the Lord s supper the next day, 
 upon the institution, nature, and end of that ordi 
 nance, and had abundant satisfaction respecting their 
 knowledge. They likewise appeared, in general, to 
 have an affecting sense of the solemnity of this sa 
 cred ordinance, and to be humbled under a sense of 
 their own unworthiness to approach to God in it; 
 and earnestly concerned that they may be duly pre- 
 parvd for an attendance upon it. Their hearts were 
 full of love one toward another; and that was the 
 frame of mind they seemed much concerned to main 
 tain, and bring to the Lord s table with them. 
 
 <*i administered the sacrament of the Lord s sup 
 per to twenty-three persons of the Indians (the num 
 ber of men and women being nearly equal;) divers 
 others, to the number of five or six, being now ab 
 sent at the Forks of Delaware. 
 
 "The ordinance was attended with great solem 
 nity, and with a most desirable tenderness and affec 
 tion. And it was remarkable, that in the perform 
 ance of the sacramental actions, especially in the 
 distribution of the bread, they seemed to be affected 
 in a most lively manner, as if, 4 Christ had been re 
 ally crucified before them. And the words of the 
 institution, when repeated and enlarged upon, sccrn- 
 ed to be entertainod with the same full and firm be 
 lief, and affectionate engagement of soul, as if the 
 Lord Jesus Christ himself had personally spoken to 
 them. 
 
 "Having rested some time after the administration 
 of the sacrament, 1 walked from house to house, and 
 conversed particularly with most of the communi 
 cants, and found they had been almost universally 
 
LIFE OF BRAINEKD. 1T7 
 
 refreshed at the Lord s table <as with new wine. 
 And never did I see such an appearance of Christian 
 love among any people in all my life. It was so re 
 markable, that one might well have cried, with an 
 agreeable surprise, ^Behold, how they love one 
 another! 
 
 "Toward night I discoursed on Titus ii, 14, and 
 insisted on the immediate design of Christ s death, 
 viz. <That he might redeem his people from all ini 
 quity. 
 
 "This appeared to be a season of divine power. 
 The religious people were much refreshed, and seem 
 ed remarkably tender and affectionate, full of love, 
 joy, peace, and desires of being completely Adeemed 
 from all iniquity; so that some of them afterwards 
 told me Hhvy had never felt the like before. Con 
 victions also appeared to be revived in many instan 
 ces; and divers persons were awakened whom I had 
 never observed under any religious impressions 
 before. 
 
 "Such was the influence that attended our assem 
 bly, that it seemed grievous to conclude the public 
 worship. And the congregation, when dismissed, 
 although it was then almost dark, appeared loth to 
 leave the place that had been rendered so dear to 
 them by the benefits enjoyed, while that quickening 
 influence distilled upon them. 
 
 "28. I concluded the solemnity with a discourse 
 upon John xi v, 1 5, * If ye love me, keep my command 
 ments. At which time there appeared great tender 
 ness in the audience in. general, but especially in the 
 communicants. O how free, how engaged and affec 
 tionate did these appear in the service of God! They 
 seemed willing to have their ears bored to the door 
 posts of God s house, and to be his servants for 
 ever. 
 
 "Observing numbers in this excellent frame, I 
 thought it proper to improve this advantageous sea 
 son, as Hezekiah did his great passover (2 Chron. 
 xxxi,) in order to promote the blessed reformation 
 begun among them, and accordingly proposed to them 
 16 
 
3 7% XIFE OF BRAINERB. 
 
 that they should renewedly enter into covenant be 
 fore God, that they would watch over themselves, 
 and one another. And especially that they would 
 watch against the sin of drunkenness (the sin that 
 easily besets them.) They cheerfully complied with 
 the proposal, and explicitly joined in that covenant: 
 whereupon 1 proceeded, in the most solemn manner, 
 to call God to witness their sacred engagement, 
 minded them of the greatness of the guilt they would 
 contract in the violation of it, and that God would be 
 a terrible witness against those who should presume 
 to do so in the great and notable day of the Lord. 
 
 "It was a season of amazing solemnity, and a di 
 vine awe appeared upon the face of the whole assembly ! 
 Affectionate sighs and tears were frequent in the au 
 dience: and 1 doubt not but many silent cries were 
 sent up to the fountain of grace, for grace sufficient 
 to these solemn engagements." 
 
 On Tuesday he went to Elizabethtown to attend 
 the meeting of the presbytery, and spent the time, 
 while t.bsen from this people, in a free and comfort 
 able state of mind* 
 
 "May 3. 1 rode from Elizabethtown home to my 
 people at Cranberry; whither they are now removed, 
 and where I hope God will settle them as a Chris 
 tian congregation. I was refreshed in lifting up my 
 Iieart to God while riding, and enjoyed a thankful 
 frame of spirit. 
 
 6 <4. My people having now removed to their 
 lands, 1 this day visited them, and preached to them 
 from Mark iv, 5. Endeavoring to show the reason 
 there was to fear, lest many hopeful beginnings in 
 religion might prove abortive, like the<seed dropped 
 upon stony places. 5 
 
 "5. I visited them again, and took care of their 
 worldly concerns, giving them directions relating to 
 their business. 
 
 "I daily discover more and more of what import 
 ance it is to their religious interests that they be 
 come industrious, acquainted with the affairs of hus 
 bandry, and able, in a good measure, to raise the 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 necessaries of life within themselves, for their pres 
 ent method of living greatly exposes them to tempta 
 tions of various kinds. 
 
 "7. I spent most of the day in writing, as usual, 
 and enjoyed some freedom in my work. 1 was favor 
 ed with some comfortable meditations this day; and 
 in the evening, was in a sweet composed frame of 
 mind: pleased and delighted to leave all with God, 
 respecting myself, for time and eternity, and respect 
 ing the people of my charge and dear friends: I had 
 no doubt but that God would take care of me, and 
 of his own interest among my people: and was en 
 abled to use freedom in prayer, as a child with a 
 tender father. 
 
 "8. In the evening I was refreshed and enjoyed a 
 tender nicking frame in secret prayer, wherein my 
 soul was drawn out for the interest of /ion, and com 
 forted with the lively hope of the appearing of the 
 kingdom of the great Redeemer. These were sweet 
 moments: I felt almost lotii to go to bed, and grieved 
 that sleep was necessary. However, F lay down 
 with a tender reverential fear of God, sensible that 
 his favor is life, and his smiles better than all 
 that earth can boast of, infinitely better than life it 
 self. 
 
 "9. J preached from John v, 40, in the open wil 
 derness; the Indians having as yet no house for pub 
 lic worship in this place, nor scarce any shelter for 
 themselves. Divine truth made considerable impres 
 sions upon the audience, and it was a season of solem 
 nity, tenderness, and affection. 
 
 **i baptized one man this day (the conjurer and 
 murderer mentioned before.) who appears to be 
 such a remarkable instance of divine grace, that I 
 cannot omit some brief account of him. 
 
 "He lived near, and sometimes attended me in the 
 Forks of Delaware for more than a year together: 
 but was extremely attached to strong drink, and 
 seemed to be no ways reformed by the means I used 
 with him. In this time he likewise murdered a young 
 Indian, which threw him into a kind of horror and 
 
1IFE OF BRAIKERB. 
 
 desperation; so that he kept at a distance from 
 and refused to hear me preach for several months 
 together, till 1 had an opportunity of conversing free 
 ly with him, and giving him encouragement, that 
 his sin might be forgiven for. Christ s sake. 
 
 "But that which was the worst, was his conjura 
 tions. He was one of them who are called powwows 
 among the Indians: and notwithstanding his fre 
 quent attendance upon my preaching, he still follow 
 ed his old charms, giving out that he himself was 
 some great one, and to him they gave heed, suppos 
 ing him to be possessed of a great power. So that 
 when I have instructed them respecting the miracles 
 wrought by Christ, and mentioned them as evidences 
 of his divine mission, they have quickly observed 
 the wonders of that kind which this man had per 
 formed by his magic charms; whence they had a 
 high opinion of him, which seemed to be a fatal ob 
 struction to their receiving the gospel. And 1 often 
 thought it would be a great favor to the Indians if 
 God would take that wretch out of the world: but 
 God only, whose thoughts are not as man s thoughts, 5 
 lias been pleased to take a much more desirable 
 method; a method agreeable to his own merciful na 
 ture, and 1 trust advantageous to his own interest 
 among the Indians, as well as to the poor soul him 
 self. 
 
 "The first genuine concern for his soul that ever 
 appeared in him was excited hy seeing my interpre 
 ter and his wife baptized at the Forks of Delaware, 
 July 21, 1745. Which so prevailed upon him that 
 he followed me down to Crosweeksung, in the begin- 
 ing of August, in order to hear me preach, and there 
 continued for several weeks, in the season of the 
 most powerful awakenings among the Indians, at 
 which time lie was more effectually awakened: and 
 then, upon this feeling the word of God in his heart 
 (as he expresses it,) his spirit of conjuration left him 
 entirely; that he has had no more power of that na 
 ture since than any other man. And he declares, 
 that he dues not so much as know how he used to charm 
 
OF BRAItfEKD. 181 
 
 and conjure; and that he could not do any thing of 
 that nature if he was ever so desirous. 
 
 "He continued under convictions all the fall and 
 former part of the winter past, but was not so deeply 
 exercised till January; and then the word of God took 
 such hold upon him, lhat he knew not what to do, 
 nor whereto turn, lie told me, that when he used 
 to hear me preach, from time to time, in the fall of 
 the year, my preaching pricked his heart, but did not 
 bring him to so great distress, because he still 
 hoped he could do something for his own relief: but 
 now, he said, 1 drove him up into such a sharp cor 
 ner that he had no way to turn. 
 
 "He continued constantly under the heavy burden 
 of a wounded spirit, till at length he was brought in 
 to the utmost agony of soul. 
 
 "After tiiis he was brought to a kind of calmness; 
 his heavy burden was removed, and he appeared per 
 fectly sedate, although he had no sure hope of salva 
 tion. I observed him to appear remarkably compos 
 ed, and thereupon asked him how he did? He replied, 
 ( \t is done, it is done, it is all done now. I asked 
 him what he meant? He answered, <l can never do 
 any more to save myself; it is all done fop ever, I 
 can do no more. L queried with him, whether he 
 could not do a little more rather than go to hell? 
 He replied, *my heart is dead, I can never help my 
 self. 1 asked him what he thought would become of 
 him then? He answered, l must go to hell. I asked 
 him, if he thought it was right that God should send 
 him to hell? He replied, it is right The devil 
 has been in me ever since I was born. I asked him, if 
 he felt this when lie was in such great distress the eve 
 ning before? He answered, *HO, I did not then think 
 it was right. 1 thought God would send me to hell, 
 and that I was then dropping into it; but my heart 
 quarrelled with God, and would not say it was right, 
 he should send rne (here. But now 1 know it is right 
 for T have always served the. devil, and my heart has 
 no goodness in it now, but it is as bad as ever it was.* 
 1 thought 1 had scarce ever seen any person more 
 #16 
 
182 :LIFE or BRAINERD. 
 
 effectually brought off from a dependence upon bis 
 own endeavors tor salvation. 
 
 "In this frame of mind be continued for several 
 days, passing sentence of condemnation upon himself* 
 and constantly owning, that it would be right lie 
 should be damned, and that he expected this would be 
 his portion. And yet it was plain he had a secret hope 
 of mercy, which kept him not only from despair, but 
 from pressing distress; so that, instead of being sad 
 and dejected, bis very countenance appeared pleasant 
 and agreeable. 
 
 4<i lt was remarkable in this season that he seemed 
 to have a great love to the people of God, and 
 nothing affected him so much as the thoughts of be 
 ing separated from them. This seemed to be a very 
 dreadful part of the hell bethought himself doomed 
 to. It was likewise remarkable, that in this season 
 he was most diligent in the use of all the means 
 for his soul s salvation, although he had the clearest 
 view of the insufficiency of means to afford him help. 
 
 "After he had continued in this frame of mind 
 more than a week, while I was discoursing publicly, 
 he seemed to have a lively view of the excellency of 
 Christ, and the way of salvation by him, which melt 
 ed him into tears, and filled him with admiration, 
 comfort, and praise to God; since which he has ap 
 peared to be an humble, devoted, and affectionate 
 Christian; serious and exemplary in his conversation 
 and behavior, frequently complaining of bis barren 
 ness, his want of spiritual warmth, life, and activity, 
 and yet frequently favored with quickening influen 
 ces. And in all respects he bears the marks of one 
 created anew in Christ Jesus to good works. 
 
 "His zeal for the cause of God was pleasing to me, 
 when he was with me at the Forks of Delasvare in 
 February last. There being an old Indian at the 
 place, who threatened to bewitch me and my people 
 who accompanied me; this man presently challenged 
 him to do his worst, telling him, that himself had 
 been as great a conjurer as he, and that notwith 
 standing as soon as he felt that word in his heart 
 which these people lored, his power of conjuring im- 
 
XIFE OF BUAINE11D. 183 
 
 mediately left him. <And so it would you, said be, if 
 you did but once feel it in your heart; and you have 
 no power to hurt them, not so much as to touch one 
 of them. 
 
 "May 10. I rode to Allen stown, to assist in the 
 administration of the Lord s supper. In the after 
 noon 1 preached from Tit. ii, 14. God was pleased 
 to carry me through with some freedom; and yet to 
 deny me that enlargement 1 longed for. In the 
 evening my soul mourned that 1 had treated so ex 
 cellent a subject in so defective a manner. And if 
 my discourse had met with the utmost applause from 
 all the world, it would not have given me any satisfac 
 tion. Oh, it grieved me to think, that! had no more 
 holy warmth, that I had been no more melted in dis 
 coursing of Christ s death, and the design of it! Af 
 terwards, I enjoyed freedom arid fervency in secret 
 and family prayer, and longed much for the presence 
 of God to attend his word and ordinances the next 
 day. 
 
 "Lord s day, If. I assisted in the administration 
 of the Lord s supper, but enjoyed little enlargement. 
 In the afternoon I went to the house of God weak 
 and sick in soul, as well as feeble in body; and 
 longed that the people might be edified with divine 
 truths; and that an honest fervent testimony might 
 be borne for God; but knew not how it was possible 
 for me to do any thing of that kind to any good pur 
 pose. Yet God, who is rich in mercy, was pleased 
 to give me assistance, both in prayer and preaching: 
 God helped me to wrestle fur his presence in prayer, 
 and to tell him that he had promised, < where two or 
 three are met together in his name, there he would 
 be in the midst of them; and pleaded, that for his 
 truth s sake he would be with us. And blessed be 
 God, it was sweet to my soul thus to plead and rely 
 on God s promises. I discoursed upon Luke ix, SO. 
 <And behold there talked with him two men, which 
 were Moses and Ellas, who appeared in glory, and 
 spake of his decease which he should accomplish at 
 Jerusalem. I enjoyed special freedom from th 
 
184 tlFS O 
 
 beginning to the rwf of r y i >. Things pef- 
 
 tiuent Jo tiie ss. hje: 1 ! \ve-v aHai ui Jv ^resented to 
 my view; airJ suca a rjiru^s .".f ^itter, taaf i scarce 
 knew h.v.v to tlismisa tin various Jieh i.* i had occa- 
 sio.i Uv touch i;p >n. A-.d blvssed b A the Lord I was 
 favore.i with some fer?en*.y and power as well as 
 freedom; so ttiat the word of God seemed to awaken 
 the attention of a stupid audience to a considerable 
 degree. I was inwardly refreshed with the consola 
 tions of God, and could, with my whole heart say, 
 Though thure be no fruit in the vine, &c. yet will I 
 rejoice in the Lord. 
 
 "16. Near night I enjoyed some agreeable con 
 versation with a dear minister, which I trust was 
 blessed to my soul; and my heart was warmed, and 
 my soul engaged to live to God; so that 1 longed to 
 exert myself with more vigor than ever I had done 
 in his cause: and those words were quickening to 
 me, Herein is my father glorified, that ye bring 
 forth much fruit. Oh, my soul longed and wished, 
 and prayed, to he enabled to live to God with con 
 stancy and ardor! In the evening God was pleased 
 to shine upon me in secret prayer, and draw out my 
 soul after himself: and 1 had freedom in supplication 
 for myself, but much more in intercession for others: 
 so that I was sweetly constrained to say, Lord use 
 me as thou wilt; do as thou wilt with me: but oh, pro 
 mote thine own cause! Zion is thine: oh, visit 
 thine heritage! Oh, let thy kingdom come! Oh, let 
 thy blessed interest be advanced in the world! When 
 I attempted to look to God, respecting my settling 
 in rny congregation, which seems to be necessary, 
 and yet very difficult and contrary to my fixed inten 
 tion for years past, as well as my disposition, which 
 has been, and still is, to go f >rfh y and spend my 
 life in preaching the Gospel from place to place, and 
 gathering souls afar off to Jesus the great Redeem 
 er: when I attempted to look to God with regard 
 to these things 1 could only say, The will of the 
 Lord be done, it is no matter to me.* 
 
1.1FE OE BRAINEKD. 185 
 
 "The same frame of mind I felt with respect to 
 another important affair I have lately had some seri 
 ous thoughts of; I could say, with the utmost calm 
 ness and composure, Lord, if it be most for thy glory, 
 let me proceed in it: but if thou seest that it will, iu 
 any wise, hinder my usefulness in thy cause, oh pre 
 vent my proceeding; for all I want, is such circum 
 stances as may best capacitate me to do service for 
 God in the world/ Oh, how sweet was this evening 
 to my sou!! I knew not how to go to bed, and when 
 got to bed, longed for some way to improve time for 
 God to some excellent purpose. 
 
 "17. 1 walked out in the morning, and felt much 
 of the same frame I enjoyed the evening before: had 
 my heart enlarged in praying for the advancement of 
 the kingdom of Christ, and found the utmost free 
 dom in leaving all my concerns with God. 
 
 "I find discouragement to be an exceeding hin 
 drance to my spiritual fervency and affection; but 
 when God enables me to find that 1 have done 
 something for him, this refreshes and animates me, 
 so that I could break through all hardships, undergo 
 any labors, and nothing seems too much either to do 
 or suffer. But oh, what a death it is to strive and 
 strive; to be always in a hurry, and yet do nothing. 
 Alas, alas! that time flies away, and 1 do so little for 
 God! 
 
 "LordVday, 18. I felt my own utter insufficien 
 cy for my work: God made me to see that 1 was a 
 child; yea that 1 was a fool. 1 discoursed, both, 
 parts of the day, from Rev. iii, 29, 4 Behoid I stand at 
 the door and knock. God gave me frcwlorn and 
 power in the latter part of my forenoon discourse: 
 although in the former part of it I felt peevish and 
 provoked with the unmannerly behavior of the white 
 people who crowded in between my people and me. 
 But blessed be God 1 gut these shackles off before the 
 middle of my discourse, and was favored with a 
 sweet frame of spirit in the latter part of fhe exercise: 
 was full of love, warmth, arid tenderness in address 
 ing my dear people. In the intermission season I 
 
1 86 XIFE OF BEAINERD. 
 
 could not but discourse to my people on the kindness 
 and patience of Christ in standing and knocking at 
 the door. In the evening I was grieved that 1 had 
 done so little for God. Oh that i couid be a flame of 
 lire in the service of my God! 
 
 "22. In the evening I was in a frame somewhat 
 remarkable: I had apprehended for several days, 
 that it was a design of Providence I should dwell 
 among my people, and had, in my own mind, thought 
 to make provision for it, and yet was never quite 
 pleased with the thoughts of being confined to one 
 place. Nevertheless 1 seemed to have some freedom, 
 because the congregation was one that God had ena 
 bled me to gather from among pagans. For I never 
 could (eel any freedom to enter into other men s la 
 bors, aiid settle where the Gospel was preached be 
 fore; God has never given me any liberty in that 
 respect, either since, or for some years before 1 began 
 to preach. But God having succeeded my labors, 
 and made me instrumental of gathering a church 
 for him among these Indians, I was ready to think 
 it might be his design to give me a quiet settlement. 
 And this considering the late frequent failure of my 
 spirits, arid the need I stood in of some agreeable 
 society, and my great desire of enjoying convenien 
 ces for profitable studies, was not altogether disa 
 greeable to me. And although 1 still wanted to go 
 about far and wide, in order to spread the hlessed 
 Gospel among benighted souls, yet i never had been 
 so willing to settle fur more than five years past, as 
 1 was in the for< going part of this week. JBut now 
 these thoughts seemed to be wholly dashed to pieces; 
 not by necessity but by choice; for it appeared to 
 me that God s dealings towards me had fitted me for 
 a life of solitariness and hardship; it appeared to me 
 1 had nothing to lose, nothing to do with earth, and 
 consequently nothing to lose by a total renunciation 
 of it; and it appeared just right that i should be 
 desiiiute of house and hmn< , and many comforts, 
 whicu 1 rejoiced to see others ot God s people enjoy. 
 
OF BRAINERD. 187 
 
 "At the same time I saw so much of the excel 
 lency of Christ s kingdom, and {he infinite desira 
 bleness of its advancement in the world, that it 
 swallowed up ail my other thoughts, and made me 
 willing to be a pilgrim or hermit in the wilderness 
 to my dying moment, if I might thereby promote the 
 blessed interest of the great Redeemer. And if ever 
 my soul presented itself to God for his service, with 
 out any reserve of any kind, it did so now. The 
 language of my thoughts (although 1 spake no words) 
 now was, <Here 1 am, Lord, send me; send me to the 
 ends of I he earth; send me to the rough, the savage 
 pagans of the wilderness; send me from all that is 
 called comfort on earth! send me even to death itself, 
 if it be but in thy service, and to promote thy king 
 dom. And at the same time I had as quick and 
 lively a sense of the value of worldly comforts as 
 ever I had; but saw them infinitely over-matched by 
 the worth of Christ s kingdom, and the propagation 
 of this blessed Gospel. The quiet settlement, the 
 certain place of abode, the tender friendship, which 
 I thought I might be likely to enjoy, appeared as 
 valuable to me, considered absolutely, and in them 
 selves, as evtr before; but considered comparatively, 
 they appeared nothing; compared with an enlarge 
 ment of Christ s kingdom they vanished like the 
 stars before the rising sun. Arid the comfortable 
 accommodations of life appeared valuable and dear 
 to me, yet I did surrender myself, soul and body, to 
 the service of God, and promotion of Christ s king 
 dom, though it should be in the loss of them all. I 
 was constrained, and yet chose, to say, Farewell 
 friends and earthly comforts, the dearest of them all, 
 if the Lord calls for it: adieu, adieu; I will spend my 
 life, to rny latest moments, in caves and dens of the 
 earth, if the kingdom of Christ may thereby be ad 
 vanced, 
 
 "I found extraordinary freedom at this time in 
 pouring out my soul to God for his cause; and espe 
 cially that his kingdom might be extended among 
 the Indians; and I had a strong hope, that God would 
 
188 LIFE OF E^AINERB. 
 
 do it. 1 continued wrestling with God in prayer, 
 for my dear little flock lu j re; and more especially 
 for the Indians elsewhere, as well as for dear friends 
 in one place and another, till it was bed- time, and I 
 feared i should hinder the family. But oh, with 
 what reluct ancy did i find myself obliged to consume 
 time irj sleep! J longed to be as a flame of fire, con 
 tinually glowing in the divine service, preaching and 
 building up Christ s kingdom, to my latest, my dying 
 moment. 
 
 "23. In the afternoon I was in the same frame of 
 mind as in the evening before. The glory of Christ s 
 kingdom so much outshone the pleasure of earthly 
 accommodations and enjoyments, that they appear 
 ed comparatively nothing, though in themst Ives good 
 arid desirable. My soul was melted in secret med 
 itation and prayer, and I found myself divorced from 
 any part in this world; so that in those affairs that 
 seemed of the greatest importance in the present life, 
 and those wherein the tender powers of the mind are 
 most sensibly touched, I could only say, the will of 
 the Lord be done. Just the same that 1 felt the even 
 ing before. I felt now the same freedom in prayer i or 
 the people of rny charge, for the propagation of the 
 gospel among the Indians, and for the enlargement 
 of Zion in general, and my dear friends in particu 
 lar: and longed to burn out in one continual flame for 
 God. In the evening I was visited by my brother 
 John Brainerd; the first visit I have received from 
 any near relative since I have been a missionary. 
 Blessed be God, if ever 1 filled up a day with studies 
 and devotion, I was enabled to fill up this day. 
 
 "Lord s -day, May 25. 1 discoursed both parts of 
 the day from* John xii, 44 48. There was some 
 degree of divine power attending the word of God. 
 Sundry wept and appeared considerably affected: and 
 om, who had long been under spiritual trouble, ob 
 tained clearness and comfort, and appeared to re- 
 joioe in God her Savior. 
 
 4i l have reason to hope, that God has lately 
 brought home to himself sundry souls who had long 
 
LIFE OF BRAIN EKD. 189 
 
 been under spiritual trouble: though there have been 
 lew instances of persons lately awakened out of a state 
 of security. And those comforted of late seem to be 
 brought in, in a more silent way, neither their con 
 cern nor consolation being so powerful and remark 
 able, as appeared among those wrought upon in the 
 beginning. 
 
 "June 6. I discoursed to my people from part of 
 Isa. liii The divine presence appeared to be amongst 
 us. Divers persons were much melted and refreshed^ 
 and one man in particular, was now brought to sec 
 and feel, in a very lively manner, the impossibility 
 of his doing any thing to help himself, or to bring 
 him into the favor of God by his tears, prayers, and 
 other religious performances. 
 
 "7. I rode to Freehold to assist Mr. Tennent in 
 the administration of the Lord s supper. In the af 
 ternoon I preached from Psalm Ixiii, 28. God gave 
 IKC some freedom arid warmth in my discourse: and 
 I trust, his presence was in the assembly. I was 
 comfortably composed, and enjoyed a thankful frame 
 of spirit; and my soul was grieved that 1 could not 
 render something to God for his benefits bestowed. 
 
 that I could be swallowed up in his praise! 
 "Lerd s-day, June 8. 1 spent much time in the 
 
 morning, in secret duties; but between hope and fear 
 respecting the enjoyment of God in the business of 
 the day. I was agreeably entertained in the fore 
 noon, by a discourse from Mr. Tennent, and felt 
 melted and refreshed, in the season of communion, 
 
 1 enjoyed some comfort: and especially in serving 
 one of the tables. Blessed be the Lord, it was a time 
 of refreshing to me, and 1 trust to many others. A 
 number of my ( ear people sat down by themselves at 
 the last table; at which time God seemed to be in the 
 midst of them. And the thoughts of what God had 
 done among them were refreshing and melting to me. 
 In the afternoon, God enabled me to preach with 
 uncommon freedom, from 2 Cor. v, 20. Through 
 the great goodness of God, 1 was favored with a con 
 stant flow of matter, and proper expressions. In 
 
 17 
 
190 IIFE OF 13RAINERD. 
 
 tlje evening, I could not but rejoice in God, and 
 bless him for the manifestations of grace in the day 
 past. Oh it was a sweet and solemn day! a season 
 of comfort to the godly, and of awakening to other 
 souls. 
 
 "9. I preached the concluding sermon from Gen. 
 v, 24, And Enoch walked with God. God gave 
 me enlargement and fervency in my discourse, so 
 that I was enabled to speak with plainness and power. 
 Praised be the Lord, it was a sweet meeting, a de 
 sirable assembly. I found my strength renewed, and 
 lengthened out, even to a wonder; so that I felt much 
 stronger at the conclusion, than in the beginning. I 
 have great reason to bless God for this solemnity, 
 wherein I have found assistance in addressing oth 
 ers, and sweetness in my own soul. 
 
 "To-day a considerable number of my people met 
 together early in a retired place in the woods, and 
 prayed, sang, and conversed of divine things; and 
 were seen by some of the white people to be affected 
 and engaged; and divers of them in tears. 
 
 "Afterwards they attended the concluding exer 
 cises of the sacramental solemnity, and then return 
 ed home, rejoicing for all the goodness of God they 
 had seen and felt: so that this appeared to be a pro 
 fitable, as well as a comfortable season to many of 
 my congregation. 
 
 "} 3. I came away from the meeting of the Indians 
 this day, rejoicing and blessing God for his grace 
 manifested at this season. 
 
 "The same day I baptized five persons, three 
 adults and two children. One of these was the very 
 aged woman of whom I gave an account in my 
 journal of Dec. 26. She now gave me a very punc 
 tual, rational, and satisfactory account of the remark 
 able change she experienced some months after the 
 beginning of her concern. And although she was 
 become so childish through old age, that I could do 
 nothing in a way of questioning with her; yet when 
 I let her alone to go on with her own story, she could 
 give a very distinct relation of the many and various 
 
I.IFE OF BRAINERD. 191 
 
 exercises of soul she had experienced; so deep 
 were the impressions left upon her mind by that in 
 fluence she had been under. And I have great rea 
 son to hope, she is horn anew, in her old age; she 
 being, 1 presume, upwards of fourscore. 
 
 "14. I rode to Kingston, to assist the Rev. Mr. 
 Wales in the administration of the Lord s supper. 
 In the afternoon I preached: hut almost fainted in 
 the pulpit: yet God strengthened me when I was just 
 gone, and enabled me to speak his word with free 
 dom, fervency, and application to the conscience. 
 And praised he the Lord, <out of weakness I was 
 made strong; 1 enjoyed sweetness, in and after pub 
 lic worship; but was extremely tired. Oh, how many 
 arc the mercies of the Lord! *To them that have no 
 might, he increaseth strength. 
 
 "Lord s-day, June 15. 1 was in a dejected, spirit 
 less frame, that 1 could not hold up my head, nor 
 look any body in the face. Yet I administered the 
 Lord s supper at Mr. Wales desire: and found my 
 self in a good measure relieved for my pressing 
 load, when I came to ask a blessing on the elements. 
 Here God gave me enlargement, and a tender, affec 
 tionate sense of spiritual things; so that it was a sea 
 son of comfort to me, and I trust more so to others. 
 Jn the afternoon 1 preached to a vast multitude from 
 liev. xxii, 17. God helped me to offer a testimony 
 for himself, and to leave sinners inexcusable in neg 
 lecting his grace, i was enabled 1o speak with such 
 freedom, fluency* , and clearness, as commanded the 
 attention of the great. I was extremely tired in the 
 evening*., but enjoyed composure and sweetness. 
 
 * !6. I preached again; and God helped me amaz 
 ingly, so that this was a refreshing season to my 
 soul and others. For ever blessed be God for help 
 afforded at this time, when my body was so weak, 
 and there was so large an assembly to hear. 
 
 "19. I visited my people with two of the reverend 
 correspondents: 1 spent some time in conversation 
 with them upon spiritual things: and took care of 
 their worldly concerns. 
 
192 .LIFE OF BR.11NERB. 
 
 "This day makes us a complete year from the first 
 time of my preaching to these Indians in New Jer 
 sey. V* hat amazing things has God wrought in 
 this time for these poor people! What a surprising 
 change appears in their tempers and behavior! How 
 5ii e savage pagans transformed into affectionate and 
 humble Christians, and their drunken and pagan 
 bowlings turned into fervent prayers and praises to 
 God! They *vvho were sometimes darkness are now 
 become light in the Lord, May they walk as chil 
 dren of the. light, and of the day. And now to him 
 that is of power to establish them according to the 
 Gospel, and the preaching of Christ, to G<;d only 
 Aviso, be glory through Jesus Christ, for ever and 
 ever! Amen. 
 
 "Before I conclude, I would make a few general 
 remarks upon what to me appears worthy of notice, 
 
 "And, first, 1 cannot but take notice that 1 have, 
 ever since my first coming among these Indians, 
 been favored with that assistance, which (to me) is 
 uncommon, in preaching Christ crucified and mak 
 ing him the centre and mark to which all my dis 
 courses were directed. 
 
 "It was the principal scope of all my discourses 
 for several months (after having taught the people 
 something of the being and perfections of God, his 
 creation of man in a state of rectitude and happiness, 
 and the obligations mankind were thence under to 
 love and honor him,) to lead them into an acquaint 
 ance with their deplorable state by nature: their in 
 ability to deliver themselves from it: the utter insuffi 
 ciency of any external reformation, or of any relig 
 ious performances to bring them into the favor of God. 
 And thence to show them their absolute need of 
 Christ to save them from the misery of their fallen 
 state: to open his all-sufficiency and willingness to save 
 the chief of sinners. The freeness and riches of his 
 grace proposed without money and without price. 
 And thereupon to press them without delay to betake 
 themselves to him, under a sense of their misery and 
 
LIFE OF BRA1NERD. If 3 
 
 undone estate, for relief and everlasting salvation* 
 And to show them the abundant encouragement the 
 Gospel proposes to perishing, helpless sinners so to 
 do. 
 
 "And I have often remarked, that whatever sub 
 ject I have been upon, after having spent time suffi 
 cient to explain the truths contained therein, I have 
 been naturally and easily led to Christ, as the sub 
 stance of every one. If I treated on the being and 
 glorious perfections of God, 1 was thence naturally 
 led to discourse of Christ as the only <way to the 
 Father. If I attempted to open the misery of our 
 fallen state, it was natural from thence to show the 
 necessity of Christ to undertake for us, to atone for 
 our sins, and to redeem us from the power of them. 
 If I taught the commands of God, and showed our 
 violation of them, this brought me in the most easy 
 way, to speak of the Lord Jesus Christ, as one who 
 had magnified the law* we had broken, and who was 
 become the end of it for righteousness, to every one 
 that believes. And never did I find so much freedom 
 and assistance in making all the various lines of my 
 discourses meet together, and centre in Christ, as I 
 have frequently done among these Indians. 
 
 "I have frequently been enabled to represent the 
 divine glory, the infinite preciousness and transcen 
 dent loveliness of the great Redeemer,- the suitable 
 ness of his person and purchase to supply the wants, 
 and answer the utmost desires of immortal souls. 
 To open the infinite riches of his grace, and the 
 wonderful encouragement proposed in the Gospel to 
 unworthy, helpless sinners. To call, invite, and be 
 seech them to come and give up themselves to him 
 and be reconciled to God th rough him. To expostu 
 late with them respecting their neglect of one so infi 
 nitely lovely, and freely offered. And this in such 
 a manner, with such freedom, pertinency, pathos, and 
 application to the conscience, as I never could have 
 made myself master of by the most assiduous appli 
 cation. And I have often at such seasons been sur 
 prisingly helped in adapting my discourses to the ca- 
 
1 1IFE OF BRAINER0. 
 
 pacities of my people, and bringing them down into 
 such easy, vulgar, and familiar methods of expres 
 sions, as has rendered them intelligible even to the 
 Pagans. 
 
 "Secondly. It is worthy of remark, that numbers 
 of these people are brought to a strict compliance 
 with the rules of morality and sobriety, and to a 
 conscientious performance of the external duties of 
 Christianity; without their having them frequently 
 inculcated upon them, and the contrary vices partic 
 ularly exposed. 
 
 "God was pleased to give the grand Gospel truths 
 such a powerful influence upon their minds, that 
 their lives were quickly reformed, without my spend 
 ing time in repeated harangues upon external duties. 
 There was indeed no room for any discourses but 
 those that respected the essentials of religion, and 
 the experimental knowledge of divine things, while 
 there were so many inquiring daily, not how they 
 should regulate their external conduct, but how 
 should they escape from the wrath to corne; obtain 
 an effectual change of heart; get an interest in 
 Christ, and come to the enjoyment of the eternal 
 blessedness. So that my great work still was to 
 lead them into a further view of their total depravi 
 ty; to show that there was no manner of goodness 
 in them; no good dispositions nor desires; no love to 
 God, nor delights in his commands; but on the con 
 trary, hatred, enmity, and ail manner of wickedness: 
 and at the same time to open to them the glorious 
 remedy provided in Christ for helpless perishing 
 sinners, and offered freely to those who have no 
 goodness of their own, no works of righteousness to 
 recommend them to God. 
 
 "When these truths were felt at heart, there was 
 no vice unreformed, no external duty neglected. 
 Drunkenness, the darling vice, was broken off, and 
 scarce an instance of it known for months together. 
 The practice of husbands and wives in putting away 
 each other, and taking others in their stead, was 
 quickly reformed. The same might be said of all 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 195 
 
 other vicious practices. The reformation was gen 
 eral; and all springing from the internarinfluence 
 of divine truths upon their hearts; not because they 
 had heard these vices particularly exposed, and re 
 peatedly spoken against. 
 
 "So that happy experience, as \vcll as the word of 
 God, and the example of Christ and his apostles 
 have taught me, that the preaching which is suited to 
 awaken in mankind a lively apprehension of their de 
 pravity and misery, to excite them earnestly to seek 
 after a change of heart, and to fly for refuge to 
 Christ as the only hope set before them, is likely to 
 be most successful toward the reformation of their 
 external conduct. I have found that close address 
 es and solemn applications of divine truths to the 
 conscience, strike death to the root of all vice; while 
 smooth and plausible harangues upon moral virtues 
 and external duties, at best do no more than lop off 
 the branches of corruption. 
 
 "I do not intend, by what I have observed, to rep 
 resent the preaching of morality, and pressing per 
 sons to the external performances of duty, to be un 
 necessary and useless at any time; and especially at 
 times when there is less of divine power attending 
 the means of grace. It is doubtless among the 
 things that ought to be done, while others are not to 
 left undone. But what I principally design is to 
 discover a plain matter of fact, viz. that the external 
 compliance with the rules of Christianity, appearing 
 among my people, are not the effect of any merely 
 rational view of the beauty of morality, but of the 
 internal influence that divine truths have had upon 
 their hearts. 
 
 "Thirdly. It is remarkable, that God has so 
 continued arid renewed the showers of his grace: so 
 quickly set up his kingdom among these people; and 
 so smiled upon them in relation to their acquirement 
 of knowledge, both divine and human. It is now 
 near a year since the beginning of this gracious out 
 pouring of the divine Spirit among tlieiu: and 
 although it has often seemed to decline for some short 
 
196 XIFE OF BBAINERD. 
 
 time, yet tlic shower was renewed, and the work of 
 grace revived again: so that a divine influence seems 
 .still to attend the means of grace, in a greater or 
 less degree; whereby religious persons are refresh 
 ed, strengthened, and established, convictions reviv 
 ed and promoted in many instances, and some newly 
 awakened from time to time. Although it must be 
 acknowledged that, for some time past, there has ap 
 peared a more manifest decline of this work, yet 
 blessed be God there is still an appearance of divine 
 power, a desirable degree of tenderness and devotion 
 in our assemblies. 
 
 "And as God has continued the showers of his 
 grace among this people; so he has with uncommon 
 quickness set up his visible kingdom in the midst of 
 them. I have now baptized, since the conclusion of 
 my last journal, thirty persons, fifteen adults, and 
 fifteen children. Which added to the number there 
 mentioned makes seventy-seven persons; whereof 
 thirty-eight are adults, and thirty-nine children; and 
 all within the space of eleven months past. And 
 have baptized no adults, but such as appeared to have 
 a work of grace in their hearts; I mean such as have 
 had the experience not only of the awakening, but of 
 the renewing and comforting influences of the divine 
 Spirit. 
 
 "Much of the goodness of God has appeared in 
 relation to their acquirement of knowledge, both in 
 religion and in common life. There has been a 
 wonderful thirst after Christian knowledge among 
 them, and an eager desire of being instructed. This 
 has prompted them to ask many pertinent as well as 
 important questions. Many of the doctrines I have 
 delivered, they have queried with me about, in order 
 to gain further light into them: and have from time 
 to time manifested a good understanding of them, by 
 their answers to the questions proposed. 
 
 "They have likewise taken pains, and appeared 
 remarkably apt in learning to sing psalms, and are 
 now able to sing with a good degree of decency in the 
 worship of God. 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 197 
 
 "They have also acquired a considerable degree 
 of useful knowledge in the affairs of common life: 
 so that they now appear like rational creatures, fit 
 for human society, free from that savage roughness 
 and brutish stupidity, which rendered them very dis 
 agreeable in their Pagan state. 
 
 "And as they are desirous of instruction, and 
 surprisingly apt in the reception of it, so divine 
 Providence has smiled upon them in regard of 
 proper means in order to it. The attempts made for 
 a school among them have succeeded, and a kind 
 Providence has sent them a school-master, of whom 
 I may justly say, 1 know of no man like-minded 
 who will naturally care for their state. 
 
 <IIe lias generally thirty or thirty-five children in 
 his school: and when he kept an evening school (as 
 ho did while the length of the evenings would admit of 
 it) he had fifteen or twenty people, married and single. 
 
 The children learn with surprising readiness: so 
 that their master tells me, he never had any English 
 school that learned, in general, near so fast. There 
 were not above two in thirty, although some were 
 very small, but what learned to know all the letters 
 in the alphabet distinctly, within three days after his 
 entrance upon his business; and divers in that space 
 learned to spell considerably; and some of them since 
 the beginning of February last (at which time the 
 school was set up,) have learned so much, that they 
 are able to read in a Psalter or Testament without 
 spelling, 
 
 "They are instructed in the duty of secret prayer, 
 and most of them constancy attend it night and 
 morning, and are very careful to inform their master 
 if they apprehend any of their little schoolmates 
 neglect that religious exercise. 
 
 "Fourthly. It is worthy to be noted, that amidst 
 so great a work of conviction, so much concern and 
 religious affection, there has been no prevalency, nor 
 indeed any considerable appearance of false relig 
 ion, (if I may so term it) or heats of imagination, 
 intemperate zeal, and spiritual pridej which corrupt 
 
198 LIFE OF B1UINERD. 
 
 mixtures too often attend the revival of religion; 
 and that there have hcen so very few instances of 
 scandalous hehavior among those who have appear 
 ed serious. The religious concern that persons have 
 been under, has generally hcen rational and just; 
 arising from a sense of their sins, and the divine 
 displeasure on the account of them; as \vell as their 
 utter inability to deliver themselves from the misery 
 they felt and feared. And it is remarkable, although 
 the concern of many persons has been very great and 
 pressing, yet I have never seen any thing like de 
 spair attending it in any one instance; whence it is 
 apparent, there is not that danger of persons being 
 driven into despair under spiritual trouble, (unless 
 in cases of melancholy,) that the world in general 
 imagine. 
 
 "The comfort, persons have obtained after their 
 distresses, has likewise in general appeared solid, 
 well-grounded, and scriptural; arising from a spirit 
 ual and supernatural illumination of mind, a view of 
 divine things as they are, a complacency of soul in 
 the divine perfections, and a peculiar satisfaction in 
 the way of salvation by free grace in the great Re 
 deemer. 
 
 "Their joys have seemed to rise from a variety of 
 views and considerations of divine things, although 
 for substance the same. 
 
 "Some have at first appeared to rejoice especially 
 in the wisdom of God discovered in the way of sal- 
 vation by Christ; it then appearing to them *a new 
 and living way, a way they had never thought, nor 
 had any just conception of, until opened to them by 
 the special influence of the divine Spirit. And 
 some of them, upon a lively, spiritual view of this 
 way of salvation, have wondered at their past folly 
 in seeking salvation other ways, and have admired 
 that they never saw this way of salvation before, 
 which now appealed so plain and easy. 
 
 "Others huve had a more general view of the 
 beauty and excellency of Christ, and have had their 
 souls delighted with an apprehension of his glory, as 
 
UFE OF ERAINERD. 199 
 
 unspeakably exceeding all they had ever conceived 
 before; yet without singling out (as it were) any one 
 of the divine perfections in particular; so that 
 although their comforts have seemed to arise from a 
 variety of views of divine glories, still they were 
 spiritual and supernatural views of them." 
 
 On a review of Mr. Brainerd s success this year, 
 who can forbear exclaiming what hath God wrought. 
 His public journal closes at June the 19th. But we 
 learn from his diary that he continued laboring and 
 journeying with various success till the 1 1th of Au 
 gust, when he proposed once more to visit Susquahan- 
 nah a and arrived in the course of the week accompanied 
 by six of his Christian Indians at Charlestowri,a place 
 about 30 miles westward of Philadelphia, and in the 
 following extracts he relates on account of his jour 
 ney from thence to the place of his destination, his 
 reception among the Indians, and all that occurred 
 of importance in his returning. It was here that 
 consumption, most fatal of Pandora s train, marked 
 him for her own. The symptoms of this deplorable 
 malady visibly appeared in his journey home, which 
 he performed with the greatest difficulty, and at the 
 risk of his life. 
 
 "August 16. It being a day kept by the people of 
 the place where I now was, as preparatory to the 
 celebration of the Lord s supper, 1 tarried, heard 
 Mr. Treat preach, arid then preached myself. God 
 gave me some freedom and helped me to discourse 
 with warmth, and application to the conscience. 
 Afterwards I was refreshed in spirit, though much 
 tired: and spent the evening agreeably in prayer, 
 and Christian conversation. 
 
 * C 18. I rode on my way towards Paxton upon 
 Susquahannah river, but felt my spirits sink, to 
 wards night. 
 
 "19. I rode forward still; arid at night lodged by 
 the side of Susquahannah. 
 
 "20. Having lain in a cold sweat all night, I 
 coughed much bloody matter this morning; but what 
 gave me encouragement, was, I had a secret hopa 
 
206 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 that I might speedily get a dismission from earth, 
 and all its sorrows. I rode this day to one Cham* 
 ber s, upon Susquahannah, and there lodged, hut 
 was much afflicted in the evening with an ungodly 
 crew, drinking and swearing. Oh, what a hell 
 would it he, to he numbered with the ungodly. 
 
 "21. I rdhde up the river about fifteen miles, and 
 there lodged, in a family that appeared quite desti 
 tute of God. I labored to discourse with the man 
 about the life of religion, but found him very artful 
 in evading it. Ob, what a death it is to some, to 
 hear of the things of God. 
 
 "22. I continued my course up the river: my 
 people now being with me, who before were parted 
 from me: travelled above all the English settlements; 
 at night, lodged in the open woods, and slept with 
 more comfort, than while among an ungodly compa 
 ny of white people. 
 
 "Lord s-diiy, Aug. 24. Towards noon I visited 
 some of the Dclawarcs, and discoursed with them 
 about Christianity. In the afternoon 1 discoursed to 
 the king, and others, on divine things, who seemed 
 disposed to hear. I spent most of the day in these 
 exercises. In the evening 1 enjoyed some comfort 
 and satisfaction, especially in secret prayer: this 
 duty was made so agreeable to me, that I loved to 
 walk abroad, and repeatedly engage in it 
 , 25. I sent out my people to talk with the Indians, 
 and contract a familiarity with them. Some good 
 seemed to be done by their visit this day, and divers 
 appeared willing to hearken to Christianity. 
 
 "26. About noon I discoursed to a considerable 
 number of Indians: I was enabled to speak with 
 much plainness, warmth, and power. The discourse 
 had impressions upon some, and made them appear 
 very serious. 
 
 "27. There having been a thick smoke, in the 
 house where I lodged, I was this mornhig distressed- 
 with paius in my head and neck. In the morning, 
 the smoke was stiil the same: and a cold easterly 
 storm gathering, I could neither live in doors, nor 
 
LIFE OE BRAIN EKD. 201 
 
 without, any long time together: I was pierced with 
 the rawness of the air abroad, in the house distressed 
 with the smoke. I this day lived in great distress, 
 and had not health enough to do any thing to pur 
 pose. 
 
 28. I was under great concern of mind. I was 
 visited by some who desired to hear me preach: and 
 discoursed to them in the afternoon, with some fer 
 vency, and labored to persuade them to turn to God. 
 I scarce ever saw more clearly, that it is God s work 
 to convert souls. 1 knew 1 could not touch them, I 
 saw I could only speak to dry bones, but could give 
 them no sense of what I said. My eyes were up to 
 God for help; I could only say the work was his. 
 
 "29. I travelled to the Delawares, found few at 
 home: felt poorly, but was able to spend some time 
 alone in reading God s word and prayer. 
 
 "LordVday, Aug. 31. I spake the word of God 
 to some few of the Susquahannah Indians. In the 
 afternoon I felt very weak and feeble; oh, how heavy 
 is my work, when faith cannot take hold of an al 
 mighty arm, for the performance of it. 
 
 Sept. 1. I set out on a journey towards a place 
 called, the great island, about fifty miles distant from 
 Shaumokiiig, in the north western branch of Susqua 
 hannah. At night I lodged in the woods. I was 
 exceeding feeble this day, and sweat much the night 
 following. 
 
 "2. J rode forward; but no faster than my peo 
 ple went on foot. I was so feeble and faint, that I 
 feared it* would kill me to lie out in the open air, and 
 some of our company being parted from us, so that 
 we had now no axe with us, I had no way but to climb 
 into a young pine tree, and with my knife to lop uff 
 the branches, and so made a shelter from the dew. I 
 sweat much in the night, so that my linen was al 
 most wringing wet all night. 1 scarce ever was 
 more weak and weary than this evening. 
 
 U 3. I rode to Delaware town; arid found divers 
 drinking and drunkon. I discoursed with some of 
 the Indians about Christianity; observed my inter- 
 18 
 
202 1IFE OF BR.1INERD. 
 
 preter much engaged in his work; some few persons 
 seemed to hear with great earnestness. About noon 
 1 rode to a small town of Shuwaunoes, about eight 
 miles distant; spent an hour or two there, and return 
 ed to the Delaware town. Oh, what a dead, barren, 
 unprofitable wretch dM I now see myself to be! My 
 spirits were so low, and my bodily strength so 
 wasted, that I could do nothing at all. At length 
 being much overdone, I lay down on a buffalo skin; 
 but sweat much the whole night. 
 
 "4. 1 discoursed with the Indians about Chris 
 tianity: my interpreter, afterwards carrying on the 
 discourse to a considerable length: some lew appear 
 ed well disposed, and somewhat affected. I left this 
 place, and returned towards Shaumoking; and at 
 night lodged in the place where 1 lodged the Mon 
 day night before: but my people being belated, did 
 not come to me till past ten at night, so that 1 had no 
 fire to dress my victuals, or to keep me warm: and I 
 was scarce ever more weak and worn out in my life. 
 
 "5. I was so weak, that I could scarcely ride; it 
 seemed sometimes as if 1 must fall off from my horse: 
 however, I got to Shaumoking, towards night, and 
 felt thankfulness, that God had so far supported me. 
 
 "6. 1 spent the day in a very weak state; cough 
 ing and spitting blood, and having little appetite to 
 any food I had with me; I was able to do very little 
 except discourse awhile of divine things to my own 
 people, and to some few I met with. 
 
 "Monday, Sept. 8. I spent the forenoon among 
 the Indians; in the afternoon, left Shaumoking, and 
 returned down the river a few miles. I had propos 
 ed to have tarried a considerable time longer among 
 the Indians upon Susquahannah; but was hindered 
 by the weakly circumstances of my own people, and 
 especially my own extraordinary weakness, having 
 been exercised with great nocturnal sweats, and a 
 coughing up of blood, in almost the whole of the 
 journey. I was a great part of the time so feeble 
 and faint, that it seemed as though I never should be 
 able to reach home; and at the same time destitute 
 
OF URAKS EKD. 0$ 
 
 of the comforts, yea, the necessaries of life; at least, 
 what was necessary for one in so weak a state. In 
 this journey I sometimes was enabled to speak the 
 word of God with power, and divine truths made 
 some impressions on divers that heard me; so that 
 several, both men and women, old and young, seem 
 ed to cleave to us, and be well disposed towards 
 Christianity; but others mocked and shouted, which 
 damped those who before seemed friendly: yet God, 
 at times, was evidently present, assisting me, my in 
 terpreter, and other near friends who were with me. 
 God gave sometimes a good degree of freedom in 
 prayer for the ingathering of souls there; and I 
 could not but entertain a strong hope, that the jour 
 ney should not be wholly fruitless. 
 
 "9. I rode down the river, near thirty miles, was 
 extremely weak, much fatigued, and met with a 
 thunder storm. I discoursed with some warmth and 
 closeness to some poor ignorant souls, on the life ant! 
 power of religion. They seemed much astonished, 
 when they saw my Indians ask a blessing, and give 
 thanks at dinner; concluding that a very high evi 
 dence of grace in them; but were more astonished 
 when I insisted, that neither that, nor yet secret 
 prayer, was any sure evidence of grace. Oh the ig 
 norance of the world! How are some empty, outward 
 forms, mistaken for true religion! 
 
 "10. 1 rode near twenty miles homeward; and 
 was much solicited to preach, but was utterly un 
 able. I was extremely overdone with the heat and 
 showers, and coughed up considerable quantities of 
 blood. 
 
 "1 1. I rode homeward, but was very weak, and 
 sometimes scarce able to ride. I had a very impor 
 tunate invitation to preach at a meeting-house I 
 came by, but could not, by reason of weakness. 
 I was resigned under my weakness; but was 
 much exercised for my companions in travel, whom 
 I had left with much regret, some lame, and some 
 sick. 
 
204 1IFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 "12, I rode about fifty miles; and came just at 
 night to a Christian friend s house, about I \\enty- 
 iive miles westward from Philadelphia. 1 was kind 
 ly entertained, and found myself much refreshed in 
 the midst of my weakness and fatigues. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Sept. 14. 1 preached both parts of the 
 day (but short,) from Luke xiv, 23. God gave 
 me freedom and warmth in my discourses; and help 
 ed me to labor in singleness of heart. 1 was much 
 tired in the evening, but was comforted with the 
 most tender treatment I ever met with in my life. 
 My mind through the whole of the day was exceed 
 ing calm; and I could ask for nothing but that "the 
 will of God might be done." 
 
 "17. 1 rode to Philadelphia, but was very weak, 
 and my cough and spitting of blood continued. 
 
 "20. 1 arrived among my own people; found 
 them praying together; went in, and gave them some 
 account of God s dealings with me and my compan 
 ions in the journey. 1 then prayed with them, and 
 the divine presence was among us; divers were melt 
 ed into tears. Being very weak, I was obliged soon 
 to repair to my lodgings. Thus God has carried me 
 through the fatigues and perils of another journey to 
 Siibquahannah, and returned me again in safety, 
 though under a great degree of bodily indisposition. 
 Many hardships and distresses I endured in this 
 journey, but the Lord supported me under them all." 
 
 It is peculiarly affecting to behold a spirit so no 
 bly ardent and zealous in the best of causes:, sinking 
 in the midst of youth, and in the full vigor of its 
 faculties, under the pressure of bodily disease; to 
 observe a life so admirably begun, which promised 
 so fail , so soon closed: a light so powerful arid steady, 
 which the Redeemer seemed to hold as a star in his 
 right-hand, so suddenly quenched in the darkness of 
 the grave. But who shall scrutinize the high behests 
 of heaven? Who shall say unto God what dost tliou? 
 \Vhen lie ordains, the youthful traveller ends his 
 journey, and his sun goes down while it is yet day: 
 the heart wanned with benevolence must be chilled 
 
IIFE OF BKAItfERt). 205 
 
 With the icy Hand of death; the tongue that utters 
 wisdom and kindness must rest in silence when he 
 the great Arbiter of life proclaims "return ye 
 children of man." But let us with pious awe con 
 template the last labors, and the last hours of Brain- 
 erd. And may the sight of his early tomb furnish 
 the ministers of Jesus with a new motive to work 
 while it is called day, and to work till the close of the 
 day. If Brainerd had retired from the field of ex 
 ertion before the last year, what would he not have 
 lost? That his work was soon done was his happi 
 ness. O God, if thou givest me long life, may every 
 hour of it be thine. But if few are to be the days of 
 my mortal pilgrimage, let every minute be improved 
 as an hour; and suffer me not to go down to the grave, 
 without the meed of usefulness, the cheering, yet 
 humbling reflection, that, as an instrument in thy 
 hand, I have turned many to righteousness. 
 
 CHAPTER Yin. 
 
 His illness. The suspension of Ids labors. His 
 journey to JVew England. His death. Conclud 
 ing reflections. 
 
 WE have seen with what difficulty Mr. Brainerd 
 performed his last journey. We are now to view 
 him closing the painful, weary journey of life, his 
 body wasting under the influence of a mortal disease, 
 while he is strengthened with might by the Spirit in 
 his inner man. The time of his departure is at 
 hand: he feels that he must soon put off this mortal 
 coil. But like the good soldier of Jesus Christ, he 
 will wear his armor to the last; he will fight against 
 Satan s kingdom to the latest hour, and die, smiling 
 at the thought, that the Captain he serves must he 
 victorious. One loves to visit the chamber where 
 the good man meets his fate; and we generally find 
 that, amidst his consolations, this is none of the 
 
06 LIFE OF BRAUVERD. 
 
 least, that the cause of religion must prosper after he 
 is gathered to his lathers and is no more seen. This 
 is happily iiiusiraled in the case of Dux id. **The 
 \vhoJe earih shall he lull oi his glory," exclaimed 
 the dying patriarch, and he prayed no more, his soul 
 departed to God who gave it. "I au> leaving tiie 
 ship of the church in a storm (said Dr, Owen,) hut 
 while the great Pilot is in it, the 1< >ss of a poor un- 
 dcrroxver will he inconsiderable." And the friend of 
 Braincrd, who wrote his life, and witnessed his hst 
 hours, says, "he expressed on his death-bed a full 
 persuasion that he should in heaven see the prosperi 
 ty of the church on earth, and should rejoice with 
 Christ therein, and the consideration of it was highly 
 pleasing to his mind." One of our poets has illus 
 trated, that the ruling passion is strong in death; 
 and in the case of Brainerd it is strikingly exem 
 plified; his ruling passion was love to God, and love 
 to souls, and it reigned xvith undiminished predomi 
 nance to the last. While he could walk and ride, he 
 went about doing good, and while he could speak, his 
 tongue was never silent in recommending to sinners 
 the Savior he so ardently wished them to embrace. 
 These remarks are confirmed by his diary. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Sept. 21, 1746. I was so weak I 
 could not preach, nor ride over to my people in the 
 forenoon. In the afternoon I rode out, sat in my 
 chair, and discoursed to my people from Rom. xiv, 
 7, 8. I was strengthened in my discourse, and 
 there appeared something agreeable in the assembly. 
 1 returned to my lodgings extremely tired; but 
 thankful, that 1 had been enabled to speak a word to 
 my poor people. I was able to sleep a little, through 
 weariness and pain. Oh, how blessed should 1 be, if 
 the little 1 do were all done with right viexvs! 
 
 "27. I spent this as the week past, under a great 
 degree of bodily weakness, exercised with a violent 
 Cough, and a considerable fever; had no appetite to 
 any kind of food; and frequently brought up what I 
 eat, as soon as it was down; J xvas able, however, to 
 over to my people, about two miles every day, 
 
XIFE OF BRAINEHD. 
 
 and take some care of those who were then at work 
 111*011 a small house for me to reside in among the In 
 dians. 1 was sometimes scarce able to walk, and 
 never able to sit up the whole day. Yet i was calm 
 and composed, and Out iitile exercised with melan 
 choly, as in former seasons. It was many times a 
 comfort to me, that life and death did not depend 
 upon my choice, i was pleased to think, that he 
 who is infinitely wise, had the determination of this 
 matter: and that t had no trouble to consider and 
 weigh things upon all sides, in order to make the 
 choice, whether 1 would live or die. 1 could with 
 great composure look death in the face, and frequently 
 with sensible joy. Oh, how blessed it is, to be habit 
 ually prepared for death! The Lord grant that I may 
 be actually ready also. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Sept. 21. I rode to my people; 
 and, though under much weakness, discoursed about 
 half an hour; at which season divine power seemed 
 to attend the word; but being extremely weak, I was 
 obliged to desist, arid after a turn of faintness, with 
 much difficulty rode to my lodgings, where betaking 
 myself to my bed, I lay in a burning fever, and almost 
 delirious, for several hours, till towards morning: 
 my fever went off with a violent sweat. I have 
 often been feverish after preaching; but this was the 
 most distressing turn, that ever preaching brought 
 upon me. Yet I felt perfectly at rest in my own 
 mind, because 1 had made my utmost attempts to 
 speak for God. 
 
 U 30. Yesterday and to-day I was scarce able to 
 sit up half the day. But I was in a composed frame 
 and remarkably free from dejection and melancholy; 
 as God has been pleased to deliver me from these un 
 happy glooms, in the general course of my present 
 weakness hitherto, and also from a peevish spirit. 
 O that I may always be able to say, "Lord, not my 
 will, but thine be done!" 
 
 "Saturday, Oct. 4. I spent the former part of 
 this week im:lcr a great degree of disorder as J had 
 done several weeks before; was able, however, to 
 
208 !IF OF BRAINERD. 
 
 ride a little every day, although unable to sit up 
 half the day, and took some care daily of persons 
 at work upon my house. On Friday afternoon I 
 found myself wonderfully revived and strengthened; 
 and having some time before given notice to my peo 
 ple, and those at the Forks of Delaware in particu 
 lar, that 1 designed to administer the sacrament of 
 the Lord s supper upon the first Sabbath in October: 
 on Friday afternoon, I preached preparatory to the 
 sacrament from 2 Cor. xiii, 5. 1 was surprisingly 
 strengthened in my work while I was speaking; but 
 was obliged immediately after to repair to bed, being 
 now removed into my own house among the Indians; 
 which gave me such speedy relief, as 1 could not 
 well have lived without. I spent some time on 
 Friday night in conversing with my people as I lay 
 upon my bed; and found my soul refreshed. This 
 being Saturday, I discoursed particularly with divers 
 of the communicants; and this afternoon preached 
 from Zcch. xii, 10. There seemed to be a tender 
 melting, and hearty mourning for sin in the congre 
 gation. My soul was in a comfortable frame, and 1 
 was myself, as well as most of the congregation, 
 much affected with the humble confession, and appa 
 rent broken- heartedness of a backslider; and could 
 not but rejoice, that God had given hina such a sense 
 of his sin and unworthiness. I was extremely tired 
 in the evening; but lay on my bed and discoursed to 
 my people. 
 
 Lord s-day, Oct. 5. I was still very weak; and 
 in the morning afraid I should not be able to go* 
 through the work of the day. I discoursed before 
 the administration of the sacrament from John i,29, 
 Behold the Lamb of God, that taketh away the sin 
 of the world. The divine presence attended this 
 discourse, and the assembly was considerably melted. 
 After sermon I baptized two persons, and then ad 
 ministered the LordVsupper to near forty communi 
 cants of the Indians, besides divers dear Christians 
 of the white people. It was a season of divine, power 
 and grace; and numbers rejoiced in Gcd. Oh, the 
 
UFE OF BRAINERD. 209 
 
 sweet union and harmony then appearing among the 
 religious people! My soul was refreshed, and my 
 friends of the white people with me. After the sa 
 crament I could scarcely get home; but was support 
 ed by my friends, and laid on my bed; where 1 lay 
 in pain till the evening: and then was able to set up 
 and discourse with my friends. Oh, how was this 
 day spent in prayers and praises among my dear 
 people! One might hear them ail the morning before 
 pubJic worship, and in the evening till near midnight, 
 praying and singing praises to God, in one or other 
 of their houses. 
 
 "ll. Towards night I was seized with an ague, 
 which was followed with a hard fever, and much 
 pain: I was treated with great kindness, and was 
 ashamed to see so much concern about so unworthy 
 a creature. L was in a comfortable frame of mind, 
 wholly submissive, with regard to life or death. It 
 was indeed a peculiar satisfaction to me, to think, that 
 it was not my business to determine whether 1 
 should live or die. 1 likewise felt peculiarly satisfied, 
 while under this uncommon degree of disorder; be 
 ing now fully convinced of my being really unable 
 to perform my work. Oh, how precious is time! 
 And how guilty it makes me feel, when 1 think I 
 have trifled away and misemployed it, or neglected 
 to fill up each part of it with duly, to the utmost of 
 my ability! 
 
 "19. I was willing eilher to die or live; but 
 
 found it hard to think of living useless. Oh that I 
 
 , might never live to be a burden to God s creation; 
 
 but that, I might be allowed to repair home, when my 
 
 sojourning work is done! 
 
 *<24. i spent the day in overseeing and direct 
 ing my people about mending their fence, and secur 
 ing their wheat. 1 was somewhat refreshed in the 
 evening, having been able to do something valuable 
 in the day-time. Oh, how it pains me, to see time 
 pass away, when I can do nothing to any purpose! 
 
 U 25. I visited some of my people: spent some 
 time in writing, and felt much better in body, than 
 
10 1IFE OF BRAINEKD. 
 
 usual: when it was near night, I felt so well, that I 
 had thoughts of expounding 1 : but in the evening was 
 much disordered again, and spent the night in 
 coughing and spitting of hlood. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Oct. 26. In the morning I was ex 
 ceeding weak and spent the day till near night, in 
 pain to see my poor people wandering as sheep not 
 having a shepherd. But towards night finding my 
 self a little better, 1 called them together to my 
 house, and sat down, and read and expounded Matt. 
 v, 1 16. This discourse, though delivered in 
 much weakness, was attended with power; especially 
 w hat was spoken upon the last of these verses, where 
 I insisted on the infinite wrong done to religion, by 
 having our light become darkness, instead of shining- 
 before men. As many were deeply affected with a 
 sense of their deficiency, in regard of a spiritual 
 conversation, and a spirit of concern and watchful 
 ness seemed to be excited in them: so there was one 
 that had fallen into drunkenness, some time before, 
 who was now deeply convinced of his sin, and dis 
 covered a great degree of grief and concern on that 
 account. My soul was refreshed to see this. And 
 though 1 had no strength to speak so much as I 
 would have done, but was obliged to He down on the 
 bed: yet i rejoiced to see such a humble melting in 
 the congregation; aiid that divine/ truths, though 
 faintly delivered, were attended with so much 
 efficacy. 
 
 4 27. I spent the day in directing the Indians 
 about mending the fence round their wheat; and 
 was able to walk with them, and contrive their bu 
 siness all the forenoon* In the afternoon 1 was 
 visited by two dear friends, and spent some time in 
 conversation with them. Towards night I was able 
 to walkout, and take care of the Indians again. 
 
 "28. I rode to Princeton, in a very weak state: 
 had sucii a violent fever by the way, that 1 was 
 forced to alight at a friend s house and lie down for 
 some time. Near night I was visited by Mr. Treat, 
 Mr. lieaty. and his wife, and another friend: my 
 
J.IEE OF BRAINERD. 211 
 
 spirits were refreshed to see them; but I was sur 
 prised and even ashamed, that they had taken so 
 much pains as to ride thirty or forty miles to see 
 me. 
 
 "Nov. 1. I took leave of my friends and re 
 turned home. 
 
 "Lord s-day, Nov. 2. I was unable to preach, 
 and scarcely able to sit up the whole day. I was 
 almost sunk to see my poor people destitute of the 
 means of grace; and especially considering they 
 could not read, and so were under great disadvanta 
 ges for spending the Sabbath comfortably. Oh, me- 
 thought, I could be contented to be sick, if my poor 
 flock had a faithful pastor to feed them. A view of 
 their want of this was more afflictive to me than all 
 my bodily illness. 
 
 **3. Being now in so low a state, that I was ut 
 terly incapable of performing my work, and having 
 little hope of recovery* unless by much riding, I 
 thought it my duty to take a journey into New Eng 
 land. I accordingly took leave of my congregation 
 this day. Before I left my people, I visited them all 
 in their respective houses, and discoursed to each 
 one, as I thought most suitable for their circumstan 
 ces, and found great freedom in so doing: 1 scarce 
 left one house but some were in tears, not only affect 
 ed with my being about to leave them, but with the 
 solemn addresses I made: for I was helped to be fer 
 vent in spirit. When I had thus gone through my 
 congregation (which took me most of the day) and 
 had taken leave of them, and of the school, I rode 
 about two miles to the house where 1 lived in the 
 summer past, and there lodged. 
 
 "4. I rode to Woodbridge, and lodged with Mr. 
 Pier son. 
 
 "5. I rode to Elizabethtown, intending as soon 
 as possible to prosecute ray journey. But I was in 
 an hour or two taken much worse. For near a week 
 I was confined to my chamber, and most of the time 
 to my bed; and then so far revived as to be able to 
 
212 1IFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 walk about the house; but was still confined \\ithin 
 doors. 
 
 "1 was enabled to maintain a calm, composed, and 
 patient spirit, as 1 had from the beginning of my 
 weakness. After 1 had been in Elizahethtovtn about 
 a fortnight, and had so far recovered that I was able 
 to walk about the, house, upon a day of thanksgiving 
 kept in this place, I was enabled to recount the mer 
 cies of God, in such a manner as greatly affected me, 
 and filled me with thankfulness to God: especially 
 for his work of grace among the Indians, and the 
 enlargement of his kingdom. Lord, glorify thyself, 
 v\as the cry of my soul. O that all people might love 
 and praise the blessed God. 
 
 "After this comfortable season, I frequently en 
 joyed enlargement of soul in prayer for my dear con 
 gregation, very often for every family, and every 
 person in particular; and it was a great comfort to 
 me, that 1 could pray heartily to God for those whom 
 I was not allowed to see. 
 
 "In the latter end of December, I grew still weak, 
 and continued to do so, till the latter end of January 
 1746 7. And having a violent cough, a consider 
 able fever, and no appetite for any mariner of 
 food, I was reduced to so low a state, that my friends 
 generally despaired of my life; and for some time to 
 gether, thought I could scarcely live a day to an end. 
 
 "On Lord s-day, Feb 1. lf ye, being evil, know 
 liow to give good gifts to your children, how much 
 more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spir 
 it to them that ask him? This text I was helped to 
 plead, and saw the divine faithfulness engaged for 
 dealing with me better than any earthly parent can 
 do with his child. This season so refreshed my soul, 
 that my body seemed also to be a gainer by it. And 
 from this time 1 began gradually to amend. And as 
 I recovered some strength, vigor, and spirit, 1 found 
 at times seine life in the exercises of devotion, and 
 longings after spirituality and a life of usefulness. 
 
 "24. I \vas able to ride as far as Newark, (having 
 been confined within Elizabcthtown almost four 
 months,) and the next day returned to Elizabeth- 
 
1IFE OF BRAINERD. 213 
 
 town. My spirits were somewhat refreshed with 
 the ride, though my body was weary. 
 
 "28. 1 was visited by an Indian of my own con 
 gregation, who brought me letters, and good news of 
 the behavior of my people in general; this refreshed 
 my soul, and I could not but retire and bless God 
 for his goodness. 
 
 "March H, being kept in Elizabethtown as a 
 day of fasting and prayer, I was able to attend public 
 worship, which was the first time since December 
 21. Oh, how much distress did God carry me 
 through in this space of time! But having obtained 
 help from him, I yet live: oh that I could live to his 
 glory! 
 
 "18. I rode to my people: and on Friday morn 
 ing walked about among them, and inquired into 
 their state and concerns; and found an additional 
 weight on my spirits upon hearing some things dis 
 agreeable. I endeavored to go to God with my dis 
 tresses: but notwithstanding my mind continued 
 very gloomy. About ten o clock, I called my people 
 together, and after having explained and sung a 
 psalm, ( prayed with them. There was a consider 
 able deal of affection among them; I doubt not, that 
 which was more than merely natural." 
 
 This was the last interview that he ever had with 
 his people. About eleven o clock the same day, he 
 left them: and the next day came to Elizabethtown. 
 
 "28. I was taken this morning with a violent 
 griping. These pains were extreme and constant 
 for several hours; so that it seemed impossible for 
 me, without a miracle, to live twenty-four hours. 
 lay confined to my bed the whole day; but it picascu 
 God to bless means for the abatement of my distress. 
 I was exceedingly weakened by this pain, and contin 
 ued so for several days following. In this distressed 
 rase, death appeared agreeable to me, as an entrance 
 into a place < where the weary are at rest; and I 
 had some relish of the entertainments of the heavenly 
 stat;*; so that J>y these I was allured and drawn, as 
 well as driven by the fatigues of life. Oh how happy 
 19 
 
214 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 it is, to be drawn by desires of a slate of perfect 
 holiness. 
 
 "April 4. I was uneasy by reason of the misem- 
 ployment of time; and yet knew not what to do! I 
 Jonged to spend time in fasting and prayer; but alas, 
 I had no bodily strength! Oh, how blessed a thing 
 is it, to enjoy peace of conscience! How dreadful is 
 a want of inward peace! It is impossible, 1 find, to 
 enjoy this happiness without redeeming time, and 
 maintaining a spiritual frame of mind. 
 
 "Lord s-day, April 5. It grieved me to find my 
 self so inconceivably barren. My soul thirsted for 
 grace; but alas, how far was I from obtaining 
 what I saw so excellent! I was ready to despair of 
 ever being holy; and yet my soul was desirous of 
 following hard after God: but never did 1 see myself 
 so far from having apprehended, or being already 
 perfect. The Lord s supper being this day adminis 
 tered, in the season of communion J enjoyed warmth 
 of affection, and felt a tender love to the brethren; 
 and to the glorious Redeemer, the first born among 
 them. I endeavored then to bring forth mine and 
 his enemies, and slay them before him; and found 
 great freedom in begging deliverance from this spir 
 itual death, as well as in asking favors for my friends, 
 and congregation, and the church of Christ in gen 
 eral. 
 
 "17. In the evening, God helped me to draw 
 near to the throne of grace, and gave me a sense of 
 his favor, which gave rne inexpressible support and 
 encouragement; I could not but rejoice, that ever 
 God should discover his reconciled face to such a 
 vile sinner. Shame and confusion, at times, covered 
 me; and tken hope, and joy, and admiration of 
 divine goodness. 
 
 2l. I set out on my journey for New-England; 
 I travelled to New-York and there lodged. 
 
 "Lord s-day, May- 10. (At liadlime,) I could not 
 hut feel gratitude to God, that he had always dis 
 posed me, in my ministry, to insist on the great doc 
 trines of regeneration, a new creature, faith in 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 215 
 
 Christ, progressive sanctification, supreme love to 
 God, living entirely to the glory of God, being not 
 our own, and the like. God has helped me to see, 
 from time to time, that these, and the like doctrines 
 necessarily connected with them, are the only foun 
 dation of safety and salvation for perishing sinners; 
 and that those divine dispositions which are conso 
 nant hereto, are that holiness without which no man 
 shall see the Lord. The exercise of these god-like 
 tempers, wherein the soul acts in a kind of concert 
 with God, and would he arid do every thing that is 
 pleasing to God; this, I saw, would stand by the 
 soul in a dying hour; for God must deny himself, if 
 he cast away his own image, even the soul that is 
 one in desires with himself. 
 
 "Lord s-day, May 17. Though I felt much dul- 
 ness this week, yet I had some glimpses of the excel 
 lency of divine things; and especially one morning, 
 the beauty of holiness, as a likeness to the glorious 
 God, was so discovered to me, that 1 longed earnestly 
 to be in that world where holiness dwells in perfec 
 tion, that 1 might please God, live entirely to him, 
 and glorify him to the utmost stretch of my capaci 
 ties. 
 
 "Lord s-day, May 24. (At Longmeadow, in 
 Springfield.) I could not but think, as I have often 
 remarked to others, that much more of true religion 
 consists in deep humility, brokenness of heart, and an 
 abasing sense of want of holiness, than most who arc 
 called Christians imagine." 
 
 28. He arrived at Northampton, and took up his 
 abode with president Edwards, and the following de 
 lightful eulogy on his character was written by this 
 most eminent servant of Christ, and inserted in his 
 life, of which this is chiefly an abridgment. 
 
 "I had much opportunity before this of particular 
 information concerning him, bat now I had opportu 
 nity fora more full acquaintance with him. I found 
 him remarkably sociable, pleasant, and entertaining 
 in his conversation; yet solid, savory, spiritual, and 
 very profitable: appearing meek, modest, and hum- 
 
:LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 ble, far from any stiffness, moroseness, superstitious 
 clemureness, or affected singularity in speech or be 
 havior. We enjoyed not only the benefit of his con 
 versation, but hud the comfort of hearing him pray 
 in the family, from time to time. His manner of 
 praying was becoming a worm of the dust, and a dis 
 ciple of Christ, addressing an infinitely great and 
 holy God, and Father of mercies; not with florid ex 
 pressions, or a studied eloquence: not with any in 
 temperate vehemence, or indecent boldness: at the 
 greatest distance from any appearance of ostentation, 
 and from every thing that might look as though he 
 meant to recommend himself to those that were about 
 him, or set himself off to their acceptance; free from 
 vain repetitions, without impertinent excursions, or 
 needless multiplying of wprcis. He expressed himself 
 with the strictest propriety, with weight and pun 
 gency; and yet what his lips uttered seemed to flow 
 from the fulness of his heart, as deeply impressed 
 with a great and solemn sense of our necessities, 
 unworthiness, and dependence, and on God s infinite 
 greatness, excellency, and sufficiency, rather than 
 merely from a warm and fruitful brain. And 1 know 
 not, that ever! heard him so much as ask a blessing 
 or return thanks at a table, but there was something 
 remarkable to be observed both in the matter and 
 manner of the performance. In his prayers he in 
 sisted much on the prosperity of Zion, the advance 
 ment of Christ s kingdom in the world, and the 
 flourishing, and propagation of religion among the 
 Indians. And be generally made it one petition in 
 his prayer, that we might not outlive our usefulness. 
 "This week he consulted Dr Mather, at my house, 
 concerning his illness; who plainly told him there 
 were great evidences of his being in a confirmed con 
 sumption, and that he could give him no encourage 
 ment, that he should ever recover. But it seemed 
 not to occasion the leasfrliscomposure in him, nor to 
 make any alteration as to the freedom or pleasant 
 ness of his conversation," 
 
LIFE OF BUilSEHD. 217 
 
 Being advised by his physician still to continue 
 riding, lie final!) determined on a visit to Boston, 
 and on the 9tli of June, he began this journey ac 
 companied by one of Mr. Edwards s family. His 
 diary unfolds the state of his health, and of his mind, 
 \vith the circumstances which occurred during his 
 journey. 
 
 "June 9. I set out on a journey from Northamp 
 ton to Boston. Having now continued to ride for 
 some considerable time, I felt myself much better, 
 and I found, that in proportion to the prospect I had 
 of being restored to a state of usefulness, so 1 de 
 sired the continuance of life; but death appeared in 
 conceivably more desirable to me than a useless 
 life: yet blessed be God, I found my heart fully re 
 signed to this greatest of afflictions, if God saw fit 
 thus to deal with me. 
 
 "12. I arrived in Boston this day, somewhat fa 
 tigued with my journey, There is no rest, but in 
 God; fatigues of body, and anxieties of mind attend 
 us, both in town and country. 
 
 "18. I was taken exceedingly ill, and brought to 
 the gates of death by the breaking of small ulcers in 
 my lungs, as my physicians supposed. In this ex 
 tremely weak state I continued several weeks, and 
 was frequently so low, as to be utterly speechless: 
 and even after I had so far revived as to step out of 
 doors, f was exercised with a faint turn, which con 
 tinued usually four or five hours! at \\hicli times, 
 though I could say yes or no. yet I could not speak 
 one sentence, without making stops for breath: and 
 divers times in this season, my friends gathered round 
 my bed to see me breathe my last. 
 
 "How I was the first day or f.vvo of my illness, with 
 regard to the exercise of reason, I scarcely know; but 
 the third day, and constantly afterwards for four or 
 five weeks together, I enjoyed much serenity of mind, 
 and clearness of thought, as perhaps 1 ever did in 
 my life: and 1 think, my mind never penetrated with 
 so much ease and freedom into divine thines, and I 
 #19 
 
218 X.IFS OE BRAINEKJD. 
 
 never felt so capable of demonstrating the truth of 
 many important doctrines of the Gospel as now. 
 
 "As God was pleased to afford me clearness of 
 thought almost continually for several weeks togeth 
 er, so he enabled me, in some measure, to employ 
 my time to valuable purposes. I was enabled to 
 write a number of important letters fo friends in 
 remote places; and sometimes 1 wrote when 1 was 
 speechless, i. e. unable to maintain conversation 
 with any body. Besides this 1 had many visitants; 
 with whom, when 1 was able to speak, i always con 
 versed of the things of religion; and was peculiarly 
 assisted in distinguishing between true and false re 
 ligion. And especially, I discoursed repeatedly on 
 the nature and necessity of that humiliation, self- 
 emptiness, or full conviction of a person s being ut 
 terly undone in himself, which is necessary in order 
 to a saving faith, and the extreme difficulty of being 
 brought to this, and the great danger there is of 
 persons taking up, with some self-righteous appear 
 ances of it. The danger of this 1 especially dwelt 
 upon, being persuaded that multitudes perish in this 
 hidden way; and because so little is said from most 
 pulpits to discover any danger here; so that persons 
 being never effectually brought to die to themselves, 
 arc never truly united to Christ. I also discoursed 
 much on what I take to be the essence of true relig 
 ion, that god-like temper and disposition of soul, and 
 that holy conversation and behavior that may justly 
 claim the honor of having God for its original and 
 patron. And I have reason to hope God blessed my 
 discourses to some, both ministers and people; so 
 that my time was not wholly lost." 
 , While he was at Boston, he was requested by the 
 commissioners of a society for propagating the Gos 
 pel in New England, and places adjacent, to recom 
 mend to them two missionaries, and they also con 
 sulted him on the propriety of sending them to those 
 Indians called the Six Nations. His advice greatly 
 pleased them, and they entertained very high ideas 
 of his prudence and piety. About this time he wrote 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 19 
 
 from Boston the following interesting and affection 
 ate letters, to which he refers in the last page; the 
 first to his brother Israel, who was then at college; 
 the second to a young gentleman, a candidate for the 
 ministry: and the last to his brother John at Bethel, 
 the town of Christian Indians, in Mew Jersey. 
 
 To his brother Israel, at college, written a few 
 months before his death. 
 
 Boston, June 30, 1747. 
 "My dear Brother, 
 
 "it is from the side of eternity I now address you. 
 I am heartily sorry, that I have so little strength to 
 write what I long to communicate to you. Hut let 
 me tell you my brother, eternity is another thing 
 than we ordinarily take it to be. Oh, how vast and 
 boundless! Oh, how fixed and unutterable! Oh, of 
 what infinite importance is it that we be prepared 
 for eternity! I have been just dying for more than 
 a week; and all around me have thought so. But in 
 this time 1 have had clear views of eternity; have 
 seen the blessedness of the godly; and have longed 
 to share their happy state; as well as been comfort 
 ably satisfied, that I shall do so; but oh, what an 
 guish is raised in my mind, to think of an eternity 
 for those who are Christless, for those who bring 
 their false hopes to the grave with them! The sight 
 was so dreadful, I could by no means bear it: my 
 thoughts recoiled, and I said, Who can dwell with 
 everlasting burnings! 7 Oh, methought, that I could 
 now see my friends, that 1 might warn them, to see 
 to it, that they lay their foundation for eternity. 
 And you, my dear brother, 1 have been particularly 
 concerned for; and have wondered 1 so much neg 
 lected conversing with you about your spiritual 
 state at our last meeting. Oh, let me beseech you 
 now to examine, whether you are indeed a new crea 
 ture? Whether the glory of God has ever been the 
 highest concern with you? Whether you have ever 
 been reconciled to all the perfections of God? In a 
 word whether God has been your portion, and holy 
 
220 1IFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 conformity to him your chief delight? If you have 
 reason to think you are graceless, oh give yourself 
 and the throne of grace no rest till God arise and 
 save you. But if the case should be otherwise, bless 
 God lor his grace, and press after holiness. 
 
 "Oh, my dear brother, flee fleshly lusts, and the 
 enchanting amusements, as well as corrupt doctrines 
 of (he present day; and strive to live to God. Take 
 this as the last line from 
 
 Your affectionate, dying brother, 
 
 DAVID BIIAINERD." 
 
 To a young gentleman candidate for the ministry: 
 written at the same time as above. 
 
 "Very dear Sir, 
 
 "How amazing it is that the living, who know they 
 must die, should notwithstanding put far away the 
 evil day, in a season of health and prosperity, and 
 live at such an awful distance from the grave, and 
 the great concerns beyond it! And especially, that 
 any whose minds have been divinely enlightened, to 
 behold the important things of eternity, should live 
 in this manner! And yet, sir, how frequently is this 
 the case? How rare are the instances of those who 
 live and act, from day to day, as on the verge of 
 eternity; striving to fill up all their remaining mo 
 ments in the service, and to the honor of their great 
 Master? We insensibly trifle away time, while we 
 seem to have enough of it; and are so strangely 
 amused, as in a great measure, to lose a sense of the 
 holiness necessary to prepare us to be inhabitants of 
 the heavenly paradise. But, oh, dear sir, a dying 
 bed, if we enjoy our reason, will give another view r 
 of things. I have now, for mure than three weeks, 
 lain under the greatest weakness; the greater part 
 of the time, expecting daily and hourly to enter into 
 the eternal world; sometimes I have been so far 
 gone, as to be speechless for some hours together. 
 And, oh, of what vast importance has a holy spirit 
 ual life appeared to me in this season! 1 have longed 
 to call upon all my friends, to make it their business 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 to live to God; and especially all that are designed 
 for or engaged in the service of the sanctuary. O, 
 dear sir, do not think it enough to live at the rate of 
 common Christians. Alas, to how little purpose do 
 they often converse, when they meet together! The 
 visits, even of those who are called Christians 
 indeed, are frequently quite barren; and conscience 
 cannot hut condemn us for the misemployment of 
 time, while we have been conversant with them. But 
 the way to enjoy the divine presence, and he fitted 
 for his service is to live a life of great devction and 
 constant self-dedication to him; observing the mo 
 tions and dispositions of our own hearts, whence we 
 may learn the corruptions that lodge there, and our 
 constant need of help from God, for the performance 
 of the least duty. And oh, dear sir, let me beseech 
 you frequently to attend to the great and precious 
 duties of secret fasting and prayer. 
 
 "1 have a secret thought, from some things I have 
 observed, that God may perhaps design you for some 
 singular service in the world. O then labor to be 
 prepared and qualified to do much for God. Suffer 
 me to intreat you earnestly to give yourself to 
 prayer, to reading and meditation on divine truths: 
 strive to penetrate to the bottom of them, and never 
 be content with a superficial knowledge. By this 
 means your thoughts will grow weighty and judi 
 cious; and you thereby will be possessed of a valua 
 ble treasure, out of which you may produce things 
 new and old, to the glory of God. 
 
 "And now *I commend you to the grace of God;* 
 earnestly desiring that a plentiful portion of the di 
 vine Spirit may rest upon you; that you may live to 
 God in every capacity, and do abundant for him in 
 public, if it be his will; and that you may be richly 
 qualified fbr the inheritance of the saints in light. 
 
 "I scarcely expect to see your face any more in the 
 body; and therefore intreat you to accept this as the 
 last token of love, from 
 
 Your sincerely affectionate, dying friend, 
 
 DATID B&AINERD." 
 
XIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 To his brother John at Bethel, the town of Chris 
 tian Indians, in New Jersey, written at Boston be 
 fore his death. 
 
 "/tear Brother, 
 
 "1 am now just on the verge of eternity, expect 
 ing very speedily to appear in the unseen world. I 
 feel myself no more an inhabitant on earth, and 
 sometimes earnestly long to depart and be with 
 Christ. 1 bless God, ho has for some years given 
 me an abiding conviction, that it is impossible for 
 any rational creature to enjoy true happiness with 
 out being entirely devoted to him. Under the influ 
 ence of this conviction, 1 have in some measure act 
 ed: oh that I had done more so! 1 saw both the ex 
 cellency and necessity of holiness; but never in such 
 a manner as now, when 1 am just brought to the 
 side of the grave. Oh, my brother, pursue after ho 
 liness! press toward the blessed mark; and let your 
 thirsty soul continually say, I shall never be satis 
 fied (ill I awake in thy likeness/ 
 
 "And now my dear brother, as I must press you 
 to pursue after personal holiness, to be as much in 
 fasting and prayer as your health will allow, and to 
 live above the rate of common Christians: so I must 
 intreat you to attend to your public work; labor to 
 distinguish between true and false religion: and to 
 that end, watch the motions of God s Spirit upon 
 your own heart; look to him for help, and impar 
 tially compare your experiences with his word. 
 
 "Charge my people, in the name of their dying 
 minister, yea, in the name of Him who was dead 
 and is alive: to live and walk as become the Gospel, 
 Tell them how great the expectations of God and 
 his people are from them, and how awfully they will 
 wound God s cause if they fall into vice; as well as 
 fatally prejudice other poor Indians. Always in 
 sist, that their joys are delusive, although they may 
 have been wrapt up into the third heavens, unless 
 the main tenor of their lives be -spiritual, watchful, 
 and holy: in pressing these things thou shalt both 
 save thyself, and those that hear thee. 
 
XIFE OF BRAINERD. S2S 
 
 "God knows I was heartily willing to have served 
 him longer in the work of the ministry, although it 
 had stiil been attended with all the labors and hard 
 ships of past years, if he had seen fit that it should 
 be so: but as his will now appears otherwise: I am 
 fully content, and can, with the utmost freedom, saj , 
 <the will of the Lord be done. It affects me to think 
 of leaving you in a world of sin: my heart pities 
 you, that those storms and tempests are yet before 
 you, which, through grace, 1 am almost delivered 
 from; but God lives, and blessed be my Rock: he 
 is the same Almighty Friend: and will, I trust, be 
 your guide and helper, as he has been mine. 
 
 "And now, my dear brother, *I commend you to 
 God, and to the word of his grace, which is able to 
 build you up, and give you an inheritance among all 
 them that are sanctified. May you enjoy the divine 
 presence, both in private and public; and may the 
 arms of jour hands be made strong by the right- 
 hand of the mighty God of Jacob; which are pas 
 sionate desires and prayers of 
 
 Your affectionate, dying brother, 
 
 DAVID BRAINERD." 
 
 The account of Mr. Brainerd s further continu 
 ance at Boston, his return to Northampton, and of 
 the state of his mind, with the circumstances of his 
 departure from this world to a better, is so interest 
 ingly related by President Edwards who was for the 
 most part, a witness of the scene, that I cannot, I 
 think, render my reader a more acceptable service 
 than by suffering him to conclude the narrative. 
 
 "Mr. Brainerd s restoration from his extremely 
 low state in Boston so as to go abroad again, and to 
 travel, w r as very unexpected to him and his friends. 
 My daughter, who was with him, writes thus con 
 cerning him, in a letter, dated June 23. "On Thurs 
 day, he was very ill of a violent fever, and extreme 
 pain in his head and breast, and, at turns, delirious. 
 So he remained till Saturday evening, when he seem 
 ed to be in the agonies of death: the family were up 
 
224 1IFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 with him till one or two o clock, expecting every 
 hour would be his last. On Sabbath-da,) lie \vasliitle 
 revived, his head was better, but very fuil of pain, 
 an exceeding sore at his breast, much pus to it for 
 breath. Y esierday he was better upon all accounts. 
 Last night he siept but little. This morning he is 
 much worse. Dr. Pyncbon says, he has no hopes of 
 life; nor does he think it likely he will ever come out 
 of his chamber." 
 
 "His physician, Joseph Pynchon, Esq. when he 
 visited him in Boston, attributed his sinking so sud- 
 dt-iy into a state so nigh unto death, to the breaking 
 of ulcers, that had been long gathering in his lungs, 
 and there discharging and diffusing their purulent 
 matter; which, while nature was laboring and strug 
 gling to throw off (which could be done no otherwise, 
 than by a gradual straining of it through the small 
 vessels of those vital parts,) this occasioned an high 
 fever, and violent coughing, and threw the whole 
 frame of nature into the utmost disorder; but sup 
 posed, if the strength of nature held till the lungs 
 had this way gradually cleared themselves of this 
 putrid matter, he might revive, and continue better, 
 till new ulcers gathered and broke: but then he would 
 surely sink again: and that there was no hope of his 
 recovery; but (as he expressed himself to one of my 
 neighbors,) he was as certainly a dead man, as if he 
 was shot through the heart, 
 
 " But it was so ordered in divine providence that 
 the strength of nature held out through this great 
 conflict, so as just to escape the grave at that turn; 
 and then. he revived, to the astonishment of all that 
 knew his case. 
 
 "After he began to revive, he was visited by his 
 youngest brother, Mr. Israel Brainerd, a student at 
 Yale College; who having heard of his extreme ill 
 ness, went from hence to Boston in order to see him. 
 
 "This visit was attended with a mixture of joy 
 am! Borrow to Mr. Brainerd. He greatly rejoiced 
 to see his brother, especially because he had desired 
 aa opportunity of some religious conversation with 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 225 
 
 him before he died. But this meeting was attended 
 with sorrow, as his brother brought him the tidings 
 of his sister Spencer s death at Huddam; a sister, be 
 tween whom and him had long subsisted a peculiarly 
 dear affection, and much intimacy in spiritual mat 
 ters. He had heard nothing of her sickness till this 
 report of her death. But he had these comforts to 
 gether with the tidings, a confidence of her being 
 gone to heaven, and an expectation of his soon meet 
 ing her there. His brother continued with him until 
 he left the town, and came with him from thence to 
 Northampton. 
 
 "Concerning the last Sabbath Mr. Brainerd spent 
 at Boston, he writes in his diary as follows. 
 
 "LordVday, July 19. I was just able to attend 
 public worship, being carried to the house of God in 
 a chaise. I heard Dr. Sewall preach in the fore 
 noon; partook of the Lord s supper at this lime. In 
 the sacrament, I saw astonishing wisdom displayed; 
 such wisdom as required the tongues of angels and 
 glorified saints to celebrate; it seemed to me 1 never 
 should do any thing at adoring the infinite wisdom 
 of God, discovered in the contrivance of man s re 
 demption, until I arrived at a world of perfection; 
 yet I could not help striving to call upon my soul, 
 and all within me to bless the name of God. 
 
 "The next day he set out in the cool of the after 
 noon on his journey to Northampton attended by his 
 brother, and my daughter that went with him to Bos 
 ton, and would have been accompanied out of the 
 town by a number of gentlemen, had not his aversion 
 to any thing of pomp and show prevented it. 
 
 "25. I arrived here (at Northampton,) having set 
 out from Boston on Monday, about four o clock, 
 P. M. In this journey, I rode about sixteen miles 
 a day, one day with another. I was sometimes ex 
 tremely tired, so that it seemed impossible to me to 
 proceed any further; at other times I was considera 
 bly better, and felt some freedom both of body and 
 of mind. 
 
 20 
 
 
T.IFE OF BRAINEKD. 
 
 .-.vd s-day, July 26. This day, I saw clearly 
 
 ,.-od himself could not make me happy unless I 
 
 fjoul-i he in a capacity to please and glorify him for 
 
 , 7 lake away this, and admit me into all the fine 
 
 ns (hat can be conceived by men or angels, and 
 
 h. oukl still be miserable for ever. 
 
 "Though he had so far revived, as to be able to 
 d thus far, yet he manifested no expectation of 
 recovery: he supposed, as bis physician did, that his 
 beb.g brought so near to death at Boston, was owing 
 to the breaking of ulcers in his lungs. He told me 
 that he had had several such ill turns before, only 
 not to so high a degree, but aa he supposed, owing 
 to the same cause; and that he was brought lower 
 and lower every time; and ii; appeared to him, that 
 in his last sickness (i Boston,) he was brought as 
 low as possible, and yet aiive: and that he had not 
 the least expectation of surviving U?c ne::t return of 
 this breaking of ulcers: but still appeared perfectly 
 calm. 
 
 "On "Wednesday morning, the week after he came 
 to Northampton, he took leave of his brother Israel, 
 never expecting fco see him again in this world. 
 
 "When Mr. lirainerd came hither, he had so 
 much strength as to be able, from day to day, to ride 
 out two or three miles, and to return; and sometimes 
 to pray in the family: but from this time he sensibly 
 decayed, and became weaker and weaker. 
 
 "While he was here, his conversation from first 
 to last was much on the same subjects as it had been 
 in Boston. He was much in speaking of the nature 
 of true religion of heart and practice, as distinguish 
 ed from its various counterfeits; expressing his great 
 concern that the latter did so much prevail in many 
 places. He often manifested his great abhorrence 
 of all such doctrines and principles in religion, as in 
 any way savored of, and had any (thougii but a re 
 mote) tendency to antinomianism; of all such no 
 tions as seemed to diminish the necessity of holiness 
 of life, or to abate men s regard to the commands 
 of God, and a strict, diligent, and universal practice 
 of virtue, under a pretence of depreciating our works, 
 
OFE 01 BRAINEKD, 27 
 
 and magnifying God s free grace. He spake often, 
 with much detestation, of such discoveries and joys 
 as have nothing of the nature of sanctification in 
 them, and do not tend to strictness, tenderness, and 
 diligence in religion, and meekness, and benevolence 
 towards mankind; and he also declared, that he 
 looked on such pretended humility as worthy of no 
 regard, that was not manifested by morality of con 
 duct and conversation. 
 
 "After he came hither, as long as he lived, he was 
 much in speaking of the future prosperity of Zion, 
 that is so often promised in Scripture; and his mind 
 seemed to he carried forth with intense desires, 
 that religion might speedily revive and flourish; yea, 
 the nearer death advanced, still the more did his 
 mind seem to be taken up with this subject. He 
 told me when near his end, that he never in all his 
 life had his mind so led forth in desires and earnest 
 prayers for the flourishing of Christ s kingdom on 
 earth, as since he was brought so exceedingly low at 
 Boston. He seemed much to wonder, that there ap 
 peared no more of a disposition in ministers and peo 
 ple to pray for the flourishing of religion through 
 the world; that so little a part of their prayers was 
 generally taken up about it, in their families and 
 elsewhere. And particularly, he several times ex 
 pressed his wonder, that there appeared no more for 
 wardness to comply with the proposal lately made, 
 in a memorial from a number of ministers in Scot- 
 laud, and sent over into America, for united extraor 
 dinary prayer, among ministers and people, for the 
 coming of Christ s kingdom: and he sent as his 
 dying advice to his own congregation, that they 
 should practise agreeably to that proposal.* 
 
 "Though he was exceeding weak, yet there ap 
 peared in him a continual care well to employ time, 
 
 * His congregation, since this, have with great cheerfulness and 
 unanimity fallen in with this advice, and have practised agreeably to 
 the proposal from Scotland; and have at times appeared wHh uncom 
 mon engagedness and fervency of spirit in their united devotions, 
 pursuant to that proposal. Also, the presbyteries of New York, and 
 New Brunswick, since this, have with one consent, fallen in with the 
 proposal* as likewise some others of God s people hi those parts. 
 
MFE OF JBKAINEKB. 
 
 and fill it up with something that might he profita 
 ble; either profitable conversation, or writing letters 
 to absent friends, or noting something in his diary, 
 or looking over his former writings, correcting them, 
 and preparing them to be left in the hands of others 
 at his death, or giving some directions concerning a 
 future management of his people, or employment in 
 secret devotions. He seemed never to he easy, how 
 ever ill, if he was not doing something for God, or in 
 his service. 
 
 "In his diary for Lord s-day, August 16, he 
 speaks of his having so much refreshment of soul in 
 ibe house of God, that it seemed also to refresh his 
 body. And this is not only noted in his diary, hut 
 was very observable to others; it was very apparent 
 not only that his mind was exhilarated with inward 
 consolation, but also that his animal spirits and 
 bodily strength were remarkably restored. But this 
 was the last time that ever he attended public wor 
 ship on the Sabbath. 
 
 "On Tuesday morning that week, I being absent 
 on a journey, he prayed with my family; but not 
 without much difficulty; and this was the last family 
 prayer that he ever made. 
 
 "He had been wont, till now, frequently to ride 
 out, two or three miles; but this week on Thursday, 
 was the last time he ever did so. 
 
 "Lord s-day, August 23. This morning I was 
 considerably refreshed with the thought, yea, the ex 
 pectation of the enlargement of Christ s kingdom; 
 arid I could not but hope, the time was at hand, 
 when Babylon the great would fall, and rise no more. 
 I was unable to attend public, worship; but God was 
 pleased to afford me satisfaction in divine thoughts. 
 Nothing so refreshes my soul, as when I can go to 
 God, yea, to God my exceeding joy. 
 
 "In this week past, 1 had divers turns of inward 
 refreshing, though my body was inexpressibly weak. 
 Sometimes my soul centered in God, as my only por 
 tion; and 1 felt that I should be for ever unhappy, if 
 he did not reign; I saw the sweetness and happiness 
 
LIFE OF BRAINERD. 229 
 
 of being Ids subject, at his disposal. This made all 
 my difficulties quickly vanish. 
 
 "Till this week, he had been wont to lodge in a 
 room above stairs, but he now grew so weak, that he 
 was no longer able to go up stairs and down. Fri 
 day, August 28, was the last time he ever went above 
 stairs, henceforward he betook himself to a lower 
 room. 
 
 "Sept. 2. Being the day of our public lecture, he 
 seemed to be refreshed with seeing the neighboring 
 ministers, and expressed a great desire once more to 
 go to the house of God: and accordingly rode to the 
 meeting, and attended divine service, while the Rev. 
 Mr. Woodbridge, of Hatfield, preached. He signi 
 fied that he supposed it to be the last time that 
 ever he should attend public worship, as it proved. 
 Arid indeed it was the last time thatever he went out 
 of our gate alive. 
 
 "On Saturday evening, he was visited by his 
 brother Mr. John Brainerd. He was much refresh 
 ed by this unexpected visit, this brother being pecu 
 liarly dear to him; and he seemed to rejoice in a de 
 vout manner, to see him, and to hear the comfortable 
 tidings he brought concerning the state of his dear 
 Indians; and a circumstance of this visit, that he was 
 exceedingly glad of, was that his brother brought 
 him some of his private writings from New Jersey, 
 and particularly his diary that he had kept for many 
 years past. 
 
 "LordVday, Sept. 6. I began to read some of 
 my private writings, which my brother brought me; 
 and was considerably refreshed with what 1 met 
 with in them. 
 
 "7. I proceeded further in reading my old private 
 writings, and found they had the same effect upon me 
 as before: I could not but rejoice and bless God for 
 what had passed long ago, which without writing 
 had been entirely lost. 
 
 "This evening when I was in great distress of 
 body, my soul longed that God should be glorified; I 
 saw there was no heaven but this. I could not but 
 
230 XIFE OF BKA1NER&. 
 
 speak to the by-standers then of the only happiness, 
 viz. pleasing God. Oh, that I could ever live to 
 God! The day, 1 trust, is at hand, the perfect clay. 
 
 "LordVday, Sept. 13. I was much refreshed 
 and engaged in meditation and writing, and found a 
 heart to act for God. My spirits were refreshed, 
 arid my soul delighted to do something for God. 
 
 "On the evening following, his feet began to 
 swell, which thenceforward swelled more and more. 
 A symptom of his dissolution coming on. 
 
 "The next day his brother left him, being obliged 
 to return, to New Jersey on some business of great 
 importance, intending to return again with ail possi 
 ble speed, hoping to see his brother yet once more in 
 the land of the living. 
 
 "Mr. iirainerd having now with much delibera 
 tion considered the important affair aforementioned, 
 left with him by the commissioners in Boston, viz. 
 the recommending two persons proper to be employ 
 ed as missionaries to the Six Nations, he about*this 
 time wrote a letter, recommending two young gen 
 tlemen of his acquaintance, viz. Mr. Eliliu Spencer 
 of East Haddam, and Mr. Job Strong of Northamp 
 ton. The commissioners on the receipt of this let 
 ter, unanimously agreed to accept of the persons he 
 iiad recommended. 
 
 "He also this week wrote a letter to a gentleman 
 in Boston, relating to the growth of the Indian 
 school, and the need of another schoolmaster. The 
 gentlemen on the receipt of this letter, had a meet 
 ing, and agreed with cheerfulness to give two hun 
 dred pounds (in bills of the old tenor.) for the 
 support of another schoolmaster; and desired Mr. 
 I emberton of New York, as soon as possible, to 
 procure a suitable person for that service; and also 
 agreed to allow seventy-five pounds to defray some 
 special charges that were requisite to encourage the 
 mission to the Six Nations. 
 
 "Mr. Brainerd spent himself much in writing those 
 letters, being exceedingly weak: but it seemed to be 
 much to his satisfaction, that he had been enabled to 
 
ilFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 do it; hoping that it was something done for God, 
 and which might be for the advancement of Christ s 
 kingdom and glory. In writing the last of these 
 letters, he was obliged to use the hand of another, not 
 being able to write himself. 
 
 6n. Thursday, Sept. 17, was the last time that 
 ever he went out of his lodging-room. That day, he 
 was again visited by his brother Israel, who continu 
 ed with him henceforward till his death. On that 
 evening he was taken with a diarrhosa; which he 
 looked upon as another sign of approaching death; 
 whereupon he expressed himself thus; *Oh the glo 
 rious time is now coming! 1 have longed to serve 
 God perfectly; now God will gratify those desires! 
 And from time to time, at the several new symptoms 
 of his dissolution, he was so far from being damped, 
 that he seemed to be animated; as being glad at the 
 appearances of death s approach. He often used the 
 epithet, glorious, when speaking of the day of his 
 death, calling it that glorious day. And as he saw 
 his dissolution gradually approaching, he was much 
 in talking about it, and also settling all his affairs, 
 very particularly and minutely giving directions con 
 cerning what he would have done. And the nearer 
 death approached, the more desirous he seemed to 
 be of it. He several times spake of the different 
 kinds of willingness to die; and spoke of it, as a mean 
 kind of willingness to die, to be willing to leave the 
 body only to get rid of pain. 
 
 "19. While 1 attempted to walk a little, my 
 thoughts turned thus; How infinitely sweet it is, to 
 love God, and be all for him! Upon which it was 
 suggested to me, <You are not an angel, lively and 
 active. To which my soul immediately replied, *I 
 as sincerely desire to love and glorify God, as any 
 angel in heaven. Upon which it was suggested 
 again, but you are filthy arid not fit for heaven*? 
 Hereupon instantly appeared the blessed robes of 
 Christ s righteousness, which 1 could not but exult 
 and triumph in; and I viewed the infinite excellency 
 of God, and my soul even broke out with longings, 
 
232 LIFE OF BRAIXEH9. 
 
 that God should be glorified. I thought of dignity 
 in heaven, but instan-ly the thought returned. <i do 
 not go to heaven to get honor, but to give all possi 
 ble glory a$ul praise. Oh, how 1 longed that God 
 should he glorified on earth also. Bodily pains I 
 cared not for; though 1 was then in extremity, I 
 never felt easier; I felt willing to glorify God in that 
 state, as long as he pleased. The grave appeared 
 really sweet, and I longed to lodge my weary bones 
 in it; but oh, that God might be glorified! This was 
 the burden of all my cry. Oh, 1 knew, I should bo 
 active as an angel in heaven; and that I should be 
 stripped of filthy garments! But oh, to love and 
 praise God more, to please him for ever! This my 
 soul panted after, and even now pants for while i 
 write. Oh that God might be glorified in the whole 
 earth! Lord let thy kingdom come. I longed for 
 a spirit of preaching to descend, and rest on minis 
 ters that they might address the consciences of men 
 with closeness and power. 1 saw God had the resi 
 due of the Spirit, and my soul longed it should be 
 *poured from on high. I could not but plead with 
 God for my dear congregation, that he would pre 
 serve it, and not suffer his great name to lose its 
 glory in that work; my soul still longing, that God 
 might be glorified. 
 
 "In the evening, his mouth spake out of the 
 abundance of his heart, expressing in a very affect 
 ing manner much the same things as are written in 
 his diary: aiid among many other extraordinary ex 
 pressions, VTI-C these; my heaven is to please God, 
 and glorifj VHII. -and to give all to him, and be wholly 
 devoted t< is glory; that is the heaven I long for, 
 this is my < Sigion, that is my happiness, and always 
 ever sine: I had any true religion; and all those that 
 are of that religion s!u:ll meet me in heaven. I do 
 not go to Inaven to he advanced, but to give honor to 
 God. It is no mutter where I shall be stationed in 
 heaven, whether I have a high or a low seat there; 
 but to !.-vr>, ,-.ri: ^ifeas* , and glorify God is all: had I a 
 thousand souls, if they were worth any thing, I would 
 
UFE OF BRAINERD. 233 
 
 give them all to God; but I have nothing to give 
 when all is done. It is impossible for any rational 
 creature to be happy without acting all for God: 
 God himself could not make him happy any other 
 way. 1 long to be in heaven, praising and glorify 
 ing God with the holy angels: all my desire is to 
 glorify God. My heart goes out to the bur) ing- 
 place: it scerns to me a desirable plare: but oh, to 
 glorify God! that is it; that is above all. it is a 
 great comfort to me, to think that I have done a little 
 for God in the world: oh! it is but a very small mat 
 ter; yet i have done a little: and I lament that I 
 have not done more for him. There is nothing in 
 the world worth living for, but doing good and fin 
 ishing God s work. 1 see nothing else in the world 
 that can yield any satisfaction, besides living to God, 
 pleasing him, and doing his whole will. My great 
 est joy and comfort has been to do something for 
 promoting the interest of religion, and the souls of 
 particular persons: and now, in my illness, while I 
 am full of pain and distress, from day to day, all the 
 comfort I have, is in being able to do some little 
 char (or small piece of work,) for God; either by 
 something 1 say, or writing, or some other way. 
 
 "He intermingled with these and other like ex 
 pressions, many pathetic counsels to those that were 
 about him; particularly to my children and servants. 
 He applied himself to some of my younger children 
 at this time: calling them to him and speaking to 
 them one by one; setting before them in a very plain 
 manner, the nature of true piety, and its great im 
 portance^ earnestly warning them not to rest in any 
 thing short f a true and thorough change of heart, 
 and a life devoted to God; counselling them not to 
 be slack in the great business of religion, or in the 
 least to delay it; enforcing his counsels with this, 
 that his words were the words of a dying man. Said 
 he, *I shall die here, and here shall 1 be buried, and 
 here you will see my grave, and do you remember 
 what 1 have said to you. I am going into eternity: 
 and it is sweet to me to think of eternity; the end- 
 
234 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 lessncss of it makes it sweet; but oh, what shall I 
 say to the eternity of the wicked! I cannot mention 
 it, nor think of it; the thought is too dreadful. 
 "When you see my grave, then remember what I said 
 to you when i was alive; then think with yourself, 
 how that man that lies iu that grave counselled and 
 warned me to prepare for death. 
 
 "His body seemed to be marvellously strengthen 
 ed, through the inward vigor of his itiiud; so that 
 although before he was so weak he could hardly utter 
 a sentence, yet now he continued his most affecting 
 discourse for more than an hour, with scarce any in 
 termission; and said of it when he had done, l it was 
 the last sermon thai ever he should preach. 
 
 "It appears by what is noted in his diary, both of 
 this day and the evening preceding, that his mind 
 was at this time much impressed wilh a sense of the 
 importance of the work of the ministry, and the need 
 of the grace of God, and his special assistance in 
 this work: and it also appeared in what he express 
 ed in conversation; particularly in his discourse to 
 Iiis brother Israel, who was then a member of Yale 
 College at New Haven, and had been prosecuting 
 Iiis studies there, to the end that he might be fitted 
 for the work of the ministry, and w ? as now with him. 
 He now, and from time to time, recommended to his 
 brother a life of self-denial, or weancdness from the 
 world, and devotednrss to God, and an earnest en 
 deavor to obtain much of the grace of God s Spirit, 
 and God s gracious influence on his heart; represent 
 ing the great need which ministers stand in of them, 
 and the unspeakable benefit of them from his own 
 experience. Among many other expressions, he 
 said, when ministers feel ih^se gracious influences 
 on their hearts, it wonderfully assists them to come 
 at the consciences of men, ami as it were to handle 
 them with hands, whereas without them, whatever 
 reason and oratory we ;-;;ke nse of, we do but make 
 use of stumps instead f hands. 
 
 <Srpt. 21. 1 bega.-i to correct a little volume of 
 rny private writings: God, I believe, remarkably 
 
XIFE OF BRAINEKD. 235 
 
 helped me in it: my strength was surprisingly length 
 ened out, and my thoughts quick arid lively, and my 
 soul refreshed, hoping it might be a work for God. 
 Oh, how good, how sweet it is to labor for God. 
 
 2. I was again employed in reading, and cor 
 recting, and had the same success, as the day before. 
 I was exceeding weak; but it seemed to refresh my 
 soul thus to spend my time. 
 
 "22. I finished my corrections of the little piece 
 forementioned, and felt uncommonly peaceful; it 
 seemed as if I had now done all my work in this 
 world, and stood ready for my call to a better. As 
 long as I see. any thing to be done for God, life is 
 worth having; but oh how vain and unworthy it is, 
 to live for any lower end! 
 
 "This day I was unspeakably weak, arid little bet 
 ter than speechless all the day: however I was able 
 to write a little, arid felt comfortably. Oh, it re 
 freshed my soul to think of former things, of desires 
 to glorify God, of the pleasures of living to him! Oh, 
 my dear God, I am speedily coming to thee, J hope. 
 Hasten the day, O Lord, if it be thy blessed will. 
 Oh come, Lord Jesus, come quickly. Amen. * 
 
 "27. He felt an unusual appetite for food; with 
 which his mind seemed to be exhilarated, as a sign of 
 the very near approach of death; he said upon it, I 
 was born on a Sabbath-day; and 1 have reason to 
 think I was new-born on a Sabbath day: and 1 hope 
 I shall die on this Sabbath-day: I shall look upon it 
 as a favor, if it may be the will of God that it should 
 be so: I long for the time. Oh, why is the chariot so 
 long in coming? Why tarry the wheels of his cha 
 riot? I am very willing to part with all: I am will 
 ing to part with my dear brother John and never to 
 see him again, to go to be for ever with the Lord. 
 Oh, when I go there, how will God s dear church on 
 earth be upon my mind! 
 
 Afterwards, the same morning: being asked how 
 he did, he answered, "I am almost in eternity: I long 
 
 * This was the last that ever he wrote in his diary with his own 
 hand: though it is continued a little farther, in a broken manner ; 
 written by hla brother Israel, but indited by his mouth, 
 
236 LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 to be there. My work is done: I have done with all 
 my friends: all the world is nothing to me. 1 long 
 to be in heaven, praising and glorifying God with 
 the holy angels: all my desire is to glorify God." 
 
 During the whole of these last two weeks of his 
 life, he seemed to continue loose from all the world, 
 as having done his work, and do;ie with all things 
 here below, having nothing to do but to die, and 
 abiding in an earnest desire and expectation of the 
 happy moment, when his soul should take its flight, 
 and go to a state of perfection, of holiness, and per 
 fect glorifying and enjoying God. He said, "that 
 the consideration of the day of death, and the day 
 of judgment, had a long time been peculiarly sweet 
 to him. -" He, from time to time, spake of his being 
 willing to leave the body, and the world, immedi 
 ately, that moment, if it were the will of God. He 
 also was much in expressing his longings that the 
 church of Christ on earth might flourish, and Christ s 
 kingdom here might be advanced, notwithstanding 
 he was about to leave the earth, and should not with 
 his eyes behold the desirable event. He said to me 
 one morning, *<My thoughts have been employed on 
 the old dear theme, the prosperity of God s church 
 on earth. As 1 waked out of sleep, I was led to cry 
 for the pouring out of God s Spirit, and the advance 
 ment of Christ s kingdom, which the Redeemer did, 
 and suffered so much for. It is that especially which 
 makes me long for it." 
 
 He once told me, that "lift had formerly longed 
 for the out-pouring of the Spirit of God, and the 
 glorious times of the church, and hoped they were 
 coming; and should have been willing to have lived 
 lo promote religion, at that time, if that had been the 
 will of God; but, says he, I am willing it should be- 
 as it is: I would not have the choice to make for 
 myself for ten thousand worlds." 
 
 He also still dwelt much on the great importance 
 of the work of ministers, and expressed his longings 
 that they might be "filled with the Spirit of God; 
 
LIFE OF BHAINERD. 37 
 
 and manifested much desire to see some of the neigh* 
 boring ministers, whom he had some acquaintance 
 with, that he might converse freely with them on 
 that subject before he died. And it so happened, that 
 he had opportunity with some of them according to 
 his desire. 
 
 "Another thing that lay much on his heart, and 
 that he spake of, from time to time, in these near 
 approaches of death, was the spiritual prosperity of 
 his own congregation; and when he spake of them it 
 was with peculiar tenderness, so that his speech 
 would be presently interrupted, and drowned with 
 tears. 
 
 "He also expressed much satisfaction in the dispos 
 als of Providence with regard to the circumstances 
 of his death; particularly that God had before his 
 death given him the opportunity he had in Boston, 
 with so many considerable persons, ministers, and 
 others, to give in his testimony for God, and against 
 false religion; and there to lay before charitable gen 
 tlemen the state of the Indians to so good effect: and 
 that God had since given him opportunity to write to 
 them further concerning these affairs; and to write 
 other letters of importance, that he hoped might be 
 of good influence with regard to the state of religion 
 among the Indians and elsewhere, after his death. 
 He also mentioned it as what lie accounted a merci 
 ful circumstance of his death, that he should die 
 here. And speaking of these things, he said, "God 
 had granted him all his desire;" and signified, that 
 now he could, with the greater alacrity, leave the 
 world. 
 
 "Sept. 28. I was able to read, and make some few 
 corrections in my private writings; but found 1 could 
 not write as I had done; I tbund myself sensibly de~ 
 clined in all respects. It has been only from a little 
 while before noon, till about one or two o clock, that 
 I have been able to do any thing for some time past; 
 yet this refreshed my heart, that I could do 
 thing, either public or private, for God." 
 
238 :LIFE OF BRAINERB. 
 
 "This evening he was supposed to be dying: he 
 thought so himself, and was glad at the appearance 
 of death. He was almost speechless, but his lips 
 appeared to move: one that sat very near him heard 
 him utter, Come, Lord Jesus, come quickly. Oh, 
 why is his chariot so long in coming! After he re 
 vived, he blamed himself for having been too eager 
 to be gone. In expressing what he found in his 
 mind at that time, he said, he then found an inex 
 pressibly sweet love to those whom he looked upon as 
 belonging to Christ, beyond all that he ever felt be 
 fore; so that it seemed (to use his own words) like 
 a little piece of heaven, to have one of them near 
 him. Being asked whether he heard the prayer that 
 was (at his desire) made with him; he said, Yes, he 
 heard every word, and had uncommon sense of the 
 things that were uttered in that prayer, and that 
 every word reached his heart. 
 
 "On the evening of Sept. 9, as he lay on his bed 
 he seemed to be in an extraordinary frame; his mind 
 greatly engaged concerning the prosperity of Zion: 
 there being present at that time two candidates for 
 the ministry, he desired us all to unite in singing a 
 psalm on that subject, even Zion s prosperity. And 
 by his desire, we sung a part of the l.0d Psalm. 
 This seemed much to refresh him, and give him new 
 strength; so that, though before he could scarce 
 speak at all, now he proceeded with some freedom of 
 speech, to give his dying counsels to those two young 
 gentlemen, relating to that great work of the minis 
 try they were designed for; and in particular, ear 
 nestly recommended to them frequent secret fasting 
 and prayer: and enforced his counsel with regard 
 to this, from his own experience of the great com 
 fort and benefit of it: which, (said he,) I should not 
 mention, were it not that I am a dying person. And 
 after he had finished his counsel, he made a prayer, 
 in the audience of us all; wherein, besides praying 
 for his family, for his brethren, and those candidates 
 for the ministry, and for his own congregation, he 
 
LIFE OF BKAINEUD. 239 
 
 .earnestly prayed for the reviving and flourishing of 
 religion in the world. 
 
 "Till now, he had every day sat up a part of the 
 day; but after this he never rose from his^ bed. 
 
 "Sept. 30. 1 was obliged to keep my bed the 
 whole day, through weakness. However I redeemed 
 a little time, and with the help of my brother, read 
 and corrected about a dozen pages in my manu 
 script, giving an account of my conversion. 
 
 "October 2. My soul was this day at turns 
 sweetly set on God: I longed to be with him, that I 
 might behold his glory:,! felt sweetly disposed to 
 commit all to him, even my dearest friends, my dear 
 est flock, and my absent brother, and ail my concerns 
 for time and eternity. Oh, that his kingdom might 
 come into the world; that they might all love and 
 glorify him; and that the blessed Redeemer might 
 *se of the travail of his soul, and be satisfied! Oh 
 come, Lord Jesus, come quickly! Amen. * 
 
 "The next evening we expected his brother John 
 from New Jersey; it being about a week after the 
 time that he proposed for his return. And though 
 our expectations were still disappointed; yet Mr. 
 Jirainerd seemed to continue unmoved, in the same 
 calm frame, that he had before manifested; as having 
 resigned all to God, arid having done with his 
 friends, and with all things here below. 
 
 < On the morning of the Lord s-day, October 4, as 
 my daughter Jcrusha, (who chieily attended him) 
 came into the room, he looked on her very pleasantly, 
 and said, <dear Jerusha, are you willing to part with 
 me? I am quite willing to part with you: I am 
 willing to part with all my friends; I am willing to 
 part with my dear brother John, although I love him 
 the best of any creature living; I have committed 
 him, and all my friends to God, and can leave 
 them with God. Though, if I thought I should not 
 see you, and be happy with you in another world, C 
 could not bear to part with you. But we shall spend 
 
 * Here ends FKs diary: these are the last words, that are written in 
 it, either by his own hand, or from his mouth. 
 
240 1IFE OF BRAINEKD, 
 
 an happy eternity together! * In the evening, as 
 one came into the room with a Bible in her hand, he 
 said, Oh, that dear hook! that lovely hook! J shall 
 soon see it opened; the mysteries that are in it, and 
 the mysteries of God s providence will he unfolded! 
 
 "His distemper now apparently preyed upon his 
 vitals; not hy a sudden breaking of ulcers in his 
 lungs, as at Boston, but by a constant discharge of 
 purulent matter in great quantities; so that what he 
 brought up by expectoration, seemed to be, as it 
 were, mouthfuls of almost clear pus; which was at 
 tended witli very great inward pain and distress. 
 
 "October 9. He lay for a considerable time, as if 
 lie were dying. At which time, he was heard to ut 
 ter in broken whispers, such expressions as these; 
 He will come, he will not tarry. I shall soon be in 
 glory. I shall soon glorify God with the angels. 5 
 But after some time he revived. 
 
 "The next day his brother John arrived from 
 New Jersey, where he had been detained much 
 longer than he intended, by a mortal sickness pre 
 vailing among the Christian Indians. Mr. Brain- 
 crd was refreshed with seeing him, arid appeared 
 fully satisfied with the reasons of his delay; seeing 
 the interest of religion, and of the souls of his peo 
 ple required it. 
 
 * Since this, it has pleased Cod to take away this my dear child by 
 death, on the 14th of February following, after a short illness of five 
 days, in the eighteenth year of her age. She was a person of much 
 iht- same spirit with Mr. Brainerd. She had constantly taken care of, 
 and attended him in his sickness, for nineteen weeks before his death, 
 devoting herself to it with great delight, because she looked on him 
 as an eminent servant of Jesus Christ. In this time, he had much 
 conversation with her on things of religion; and iu his dying state, 
 often expressed to us, her parents, his great satisfaction concerning 
 her true piety, and his confidence that he should meet her in heaven: 
 and his high opinion of her, not only as a true Christian, but a very 
 eminent saint; one whose soul was uncommonly fed and entertained 
 with things that appertain to the most spiritual parts of religion; and 
 one who, by the temper of her mind, was the fittest to deny herself 
 for God, and to do good beyond any young woman that he knew of. 
 She had manifested a heart uncommonly devoted to God, in the course 
 of her life. Many years before she was taken to her death-bed, she 
 said, that she had not seen one minute for several years, wherein she 
 desired to live one minute longer, for the sake of any other good in life, 
 but doing good, living to God, and doing what rui^bt be for his glory. 
 
LIFE OF BRAIXER1). 241 
 
 "Thursday, Oct. 8. He told me it was impossi 
 ble tor any one to conceive the distress he felt in his 
 breast. He manifested much concern lest he should 
 dishonor God by impatience. He desired that 
 others would be much in lifting up their hearts to 
 God for him. He signified, that he expected to die 
 that night; but seemed to fear a longer delay: and 
 the disposition of his mind with regard to death ap 
 peared still the same that it had been all along. 
 And notwithstanding his bodily agonies, yet the 
 interest of Zion lay still with great weight on his 
 mind; as appeared by some considerable discourse 
 he had that evening with Mr. Billing, one of the 
 neighboring ministers, concerning the great im 
 portance of the work of the ministry. Afterwards 
 when it was very late in the night, he had much 
 discourse with his brother John, concerning his con 
 gregation in New Jersey, and the interest of relig 
 ion among the Indians. In the latter part of the 
 night, his bodily distresses seemed to rise to a great 
 er height than ever; and he said to those then about 
 him, that <lt was another thing to die than what peo 
 ple imagined; explaining himself to mean, they 
 were not aware what bodily pain and anguish are 
 undergone before death. Toward day, his eyes were 
 fixed; and he continued lying immoveable, until 
 about six o clock in the morning, and then expired, 
 on Friday, October 6, 1747, when his soul was 
 received by his dear Lord and Master, as an emi 
 nently faithful servant, into a state of perfection, of 
 holiness, and fruition of God, which he had so ar 
 dently longed for." 
 
 Thus died, in the 30th year of his age, the excel 
 lent and indefatigable David Brainerd, after having 
 been engaged four years in the arduous labor of a 
 missionary of Christ. 
 
 Much respect was shown to his memory at his 
 funeral; which was on the Monday following, after 
 a sermon preached the same day, on that occasion. 
 His funeral was attended by eight of the neighbor- 
 
OF BUAINEUB. 
 
 ing ministers, seventeen other gentlemen of liberal 
 education, and a great concourse of people. 
 
 If the greatness of a character is to be estimated 
 by the object which it pursues, the dangers it braves, 
 the difficulties it encounters, and the purity and en 
 ergy of its motives, David tiraincrd is one of the 
 greatest characters that ever appeared in the world. 
 Compared with this standard of greatness, what lit 
 tle things are the Alexanders, the Caesars, the con 
 querors, and the tyrants of the whole earth. A no 
 bler object no human or angelic mind could ever 
 propose to itself, than to promote the glory of the 
 great Governor of the universe, in studying and 
 laboring to diffuse purity arid happiness among his 
 unholy and miserable creatures. To pursue this ob 
 ject with unwearied and unchangeable firmness, to 
 make ever} thought, wish, and action to center in it, 
 and to suffer the greatest hardships rather than for 
 one moment to abandon it, displays an elevation of 
 character which excites in the beholder, the profound- 
 cst reverence. But it is motive which is mighty in 
 the eye of heaven. And who will impeach the mo 
 tives of a man who endured all his afflictions, who 
 encountered all his difficulties in the promotion of a 
 cause which the world despises, and in opposition to 
 ambition, the love of wealth, the love of ease, and a 
 passion for fame. Take away these stimuli from the 
 little creatures we call great, and they sink into 
 insipid negligence and fatuity. Purity of motive is 
 essential to real worth, and that worth is to be esti 
 mated by the energy of the principle. Love to God 
 and man, as we have before remarked, led Brainerd 
 to renounce the quiescent feelings, nor was there any 
 thing in the feeble state of his body, and the appa 
 rently insurmountable barriers which surrounded 
 him on every side that could damp his ardor. His 
 benevolence was an immortal flame. Many waters 
 could not quench it, neither could the floods drown 
 it, and at this moment, it warms the spirit that tunes 
 i-he loudest and the sweetest harp in heaven. 
 
LIFE OF BRAIN EBB. 245 
 
 The life of Brainerd presents a conduct worthy of 
 the closest imitation. Twenty such men in Britain 
 laboring for ten years, what would they not accom 
 plish, not a town, not a village in the empire would 
 have reason to complain <*J<o man careth fur our 
 souls." Lord of the harvest send forth many such 
 laborers. "Thou that hast the seven stars in thy 
 right hand, appoint thy chosen priests according to 
 their orders and courses of old, to minister before 
 thee, and duly to press and pour out the consecrated 
 oil into thy holy and ever-burning lamps. For this 
 purpose, send out the spirit of prayer upon thy 
 churches, and stir up their vows as the sound of many 
 waters round about thy throne." 
 
 We learn from the life of holy Brainerd the value 
 and honor which we ought to put upon the missiona 
 ries of Christ. If we esteem ministers who labor 
 in civilized places, surrounded by their friends, and 
 protected by lawj surely missionaries, whose exer 
 tions are far more abundant than theirs, and who are 
 deprived of all the endearments of society, and ex 
 posed to the most imminent dangers, have an infi 
 nitely higher claim upon our regard. 
 
 A missionary demands our admiration. To sac 
 rifice every earthly interest, to choose a dreary ex 
 ile, to abjure the consolations of friendship in our 
 native country, to labor where we are not known, 
 where the voice of encouragement is never heard, 
 and the tear of affection never mingled with our 
 own, displays a greatness beyond even the concep 
 tion of common men. 1 never see a missionary but 
 1 think I behold a visible representation of Him who 
 went about doing good. 
 
 A missionary claims our sympathy. What! are 
 we brethren in Christ Jesus? I3o we long for the 
 glory of Messiah s kingdom? And shall we not re 
 member, with sympathizing kindness, those who, 
 because the love of Christ constraineth them, 
 are voluntary sufferers in heathen countries. Yes! 
 ye missionaries of Jesus; if we forget you, "may 
 our right hand forget its cunning." 
 
244 1LIFE OF BRAINERD. 
 
 Missionaries need our prayers. In tliis respect we 
 are bound to hold up their hands. We should never 
 bow before a throne of grace without earnestly im 
 ploring; the choicest blessings of heaven to be poured 
 forth upon them. 
 
 Missionaries likewise deserve our support; \ve 
 should give of the <gold of Sheba/ to those who are 
 the most active and devoted laborers in the vineyard 
 of our Lord. They should suffer no privation when 
 we can furnish them with the comforts they require. 
 "Supported is their right," and I dare believe that 
 the liberality of Christians will always encourage 
 the work of missions, that they will ever exert i hem- 
 selves for the glorious object which they have sol 
 emnly pledged themselves to promote at the altar of 
 devotion. 
 
 We have abundant reason to rejoice in the diffu 
 sion of a missionary spirit, and in the increase of 
 missionaries. Holy Brainerd feels his heaven en 
 riched while he contemplates the enlargement of 
 Emmanuel s empire. He was but the morning- 
 star of a missionary day. The twilight has now 
 passed away, the morning dawns, the star gives 
 place to the glorious sun, and that sun shall enlight 
 en the whole globe at one and the same moment: the 
 earth shall be full of his glory, and it shall be a glory 
 of grace and truth, of righteousness and peace. O 
 thou Prince of the kings of the earth, come forth 
 out of thy royal chambers, put on the visible robes 
 of thy imperial majesty, take up that unlimited 
 sceptre, which thy Almighty Father hath bequeathed 
 thee, for now the voice of thy bride calls thee, and all 
 creatures sigh to be renewed." 
 
APPENDIX, 
 
 CONTAINING 
 
 SOME REFLECTIONS AND OBSERVATIONS ON THE 
 MEMOIRS OF MR. BKAINERD. 
 
 BY PRESIDENT EDWARDS- 
 
 WE have here opportunity, as I apprehend, in a very 
 lively instance, to see the nature of true religion; and 
 the manner of its operation when exemplified in a 
 high, degree and powerful exercise. Particularly it 
 may be worthy to he observed, 
 
 How greatly Mr. Brai nerd s religion differed 
 from that of some pretenders to the experience of a 
 clear work of saving conversion wrought on their 
 hearts; who depending and living on that, settle in a 
 cold, careless, and carnal frame of mind, and in a 
 neglect of thorough, earnest religion, in the stated 
 practice of it. Although his convictions and conver 
 sion were in all respects exceeding clear, and very 
 remarkable; yet how far was he from acting as 
 though lie thought lie had got through Ids work, when 
 once he had obtained comfort, and satisfaction of his 
 interest in Christ, and title to heaven? On the con 
 trary, that work on his heart, by which he was 
 brought to this, was with him evidently but the be 
 ginning of his work, his first entering on the great 
 business of religion and the service of God, his first 
 setting out in his race. His obtaining rest of soul in 
 Christ, after earnest striving to enter in at the strait 
 gate, and being violent to take the kingdom of heaven, 
 Ue did not look t upon as putting an end to any fur- 
 
240 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 ther occasion for striving and violence in religion; 
 but these were continued still, and maintained con- 
 stand), through all changes, to the very end of life. 
 His work was not finished, nor his race ended, till 
 life was ended; agreeable to scripture representations 
 of the Christian life. He continued pressing forward 
 in a constant manner, forgetting the things that 
 were behind, and reaching forth towards the things 
 that were before. His pains and earnestness in 
 the business of religion were rather increased, 
 than diminished, after he had received comfort arid 
 satisfaction concerning the safety of his state. Those 
 divine principles, which after this he was actuated by, 
 of love to God, and longings and thirstings after ho 
 liness, seem to be more effectual to engage him to 
 pains and activity in religion, than fear of hell had 
 been before. 
 
 And as his conversion was not the end of his 
 work, or of the course of his diligence and strivings 
 in religion; so neither was it the end of the 
 work of the spirit of God on his heart; but on the con 
 trary, tha beginning of that work; the beginning of 
 his spiritual discoveries, and holy views; the first 
 dawning of the light, which thenceforward increased 
 more and more; the beginning of his holy affections, 
 his sorrow for sin, his love to God, his rejoicing in 
 Christ Jesus, his longings after holiness. And the 
 powerful operations of the Spirit of God in these 
 things, were carried on, from tSie day of his conver 
 sion, in a continued course,to his dying day. His re 
 ligious experiences, his admiration, his joy, and praise, 
 and flowing affections, did not only hold up to a con 
 siderable height for a few days, weeks, or months, 
 at first, while hope and comfort were new things with 
 him: and then gradually dwindle and die away, 
 till they came to almost nothing, and so leave him 
 without any sensible or remarkable experience of 
 spiritual discoveries, or holy and divine affections 
 for months together; as it is with many, who, after 
 the newness of things is over, soon come to that pass, 
 that is again with them very much as it used to be 
 
REFLECTIONS. 
 
 before their supposed conversion; with respect to any 
 present views of God s glory, of Christ s excellency, 
 or of the beauty of divine things; and with respect to 
 any present thirstings for God, or ardent out-goings 
 of their souls after divine objects: but only now and 
 then the) have a comfortable reflection on things they 
 have met with in times past, and are something af 
 fected with them; and so rest easy, thinking all 
 things are well; they have had a good clear work, 
 and their state is safe, and they doubt not but they 
 shall go to heaven when they die. How far other 
 wise was it with Mr. Brainerd, than it is with such 
 persons! His experiences, instead of dying away, 
 were evidently of an increasing nature. His first love 
 and other holy affections, even at the beginning, were 
 very great; but after months and years it became 
 much greater, and more remarkable; and the spirit 
 ual exercises of his mind continued exceeding great 
 (though not equally so at all times, jet usually so,) 
 without indulged remissness, and without habitual 
 dwindling and dying away, even till his decease. 
 They began in a time of general deadness all over the 
 land, and were greatly increased in a time of general 
 reviving of religion. And when religion decayed 
 again, and a general deadness returned, his experien 
 ces were still kept up in their height, and his holy 
 exercises maintained in their life arid vigor; and so 
 continued to be, in a general course, wherever he 
 was, and whatever his circumstances were, among 
 English and Indians, in company and alone, in towns 
 and cities, and in the howling wilderness, in sickness 
 and in health, living and dying. This is agreeable to 
 Scripture descriptions of true and right religion, and 
 of the Christian life. The change, that was wrought 
 in him at his conversion, was agreeable to Scripture 
 representations of that change which is wrought in 
 true conversion; a great change, and an abiding 
 change, rendering him a new man, a new creature; 
 not only a change as to hope and comfort, and an ap 
 prehension of his own good estate; and a transient 
 change, consisting in high flights of passing affections; 
 
248 
 
 but a change ofnaturc, a change of the abiding habit 
 and temper.of his mind. Nor a partial change, merely 
 in point of opinion, or outward reformation; much 
 less a change from one error to another: from one sin 
 to another: but an universal change, both internal 
 and external; as from corrupt and dangerous prin 
 ciples in religion, unto the belief of the truth, so 
 from both the habits and ways of sin, unto univer 
 sal holiness of heart and practice; from the power 
 and service of Satan unto God. 
 
 His religion did apparently and greatly differ from 
 that of many high pretenders to religion, who are 
 frequently actuated by vehement emotions of mind, 
 and are carried on in a course of sudden and strong 
 impressions , and supposed high illuminations and im 
 mediate discoveries, and at the same time are persons 
 of a virulent "zeal, not according to knowledge." 
 
 His convictions, preceding his conversion, did not 
 arise from any frightful impressions on his imagina 
 tion, or any external images and ideas of fire and 
 brimstone, a sword of vengeance drawn, a dark pit 
 open, devils in terrible shapes, &c. strongly fixed in 
 his mind. His sight of his own sinfulness did not 
 consist in any imagination of a heap of loathsome 
 material filthiness within him; nor did his sense of 
 the hardness of his heart consist in any bodily feeling 
 in his breast something hard and heavy like a stone, 
 nor in any imaginations whatever of such a nature. 
 
 His first discovery of God, of Christ, at his conver 
 sion, was not any strong idea of any external glory 
 or brightness, or majesty and beauty of countenance, 
 or pleasant voice; nor was it any supposed immedi 
 ate manifestation of God s love to him in particular; 
 nor any imagination of Christ s smiling face, arms 
 open, or words immediately spoken to him, as by 
 name, revealing Christ s love to him; either words of 
 Scripture or any other: but a manifestation of God V 
 glory, and the beauty of his nature, as supremely ex-* 
 cellent in itself; powerfully drawing, and sweetly 
 captivating the heart; bringing him to a hearty de 
 sire to exalt God, set him on the throne, and give 
 
REFLECTIONS. 249 
 
 him supreme honor and glory, as the king and sov 
 ereign of the universe; and also a new sense of the 
 infinite wisdom, suitableness, and excellency of the 
 way of salvation by Christ; powerfully engaging 
 his whole soul to embrace this way of salvation, and 
 to delight in it. His first faith did not consist in be 
 lieving that Christ loved him, and died for him in 
 particular. His first comfort was not from any se 
 cret suggestion of God s eternal love to him, or tiiat 
 God was reconciled to him, or intended great mercy 
 for him; by any such texts as these, "Son be of good 
 cheer, thy sins are forgiven thee. Fear not 1 am 
 thy God," &c. or in any such way. On the contra 
 ry, when God s glory was first discovered to him, it 
 was without any thought of salvation as his own. 
 His first experience of the sanctifying and comforting 
 power of God s Spirit did not begin in some bodily 
 sensation, any pleasant warm feeling in his breast, 
 that he (as some others) called the feeling of the love 
 of Christ in him, and being full of the Spirit. How 
 exceeding far were his experiences at his first con 
 version from things of such a nature! 
 
 And if we look through the whole series of his ex 
 periences, from his conversion to his death, we shall 
 find none of this kind. 1 have had occasion to read 
 liis diary over and over, and very particularly and 
 critically to review every passage in it; and I find 
 no one instance of a strong impression on his imagi 
 nation, through his whole life: no instance of a strong 
 ly impressed idea of any external glory and bright 
 ness, of any bodily form and shape, any beautiful 
 majestic countenance: no imaginary sight of Christ 
 hanging on the cross, with his blood streaming from 
 his wounds; or seated in heaven on a bright throne, 
 with angels and saints bowing before him; or with 
 a countenance smiling on him; or ai-ms open to em 
 brace him: no ^sight of heaven, in his imagination, 
 with gates of pearl, and golden streets, and vast mul 
 titudes of glorious inhabitants, withshining garments: 
 no sight of the book of life opened, with his name 
 written in it; no hearing of the sweet music made by 
 22 
 
50 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 the songs of heavenly hosts; no hearing God or 
 Christ i uiiiied lately speaking to him; nor any sudden 
 suggestions of words or sentences, either words of 
 Scripture or any other, as then immediately spoken 
 or sent to him: no new objective revelations, no sud 
 den strong suggestions of secret facts. Nor do I find 
 any one instance in all the records he has left of his 
 own life, from beginning to end, of joy excited from 
 a supposed immediate witness of the spirit; or inward 
 immediate suggestion, that his state was surely good; 
 that God loved him with an everlasting love, that 
 Christ died for him in particular, and that heaven 
 was his; either with or without a text of Scripture: 
 no instance of comfort by a sudden bearing in upon 
 Lis mind, as though at that very time directed by God 
 to him in particular, any such kind of texts as these; 
 "Fear not J am with thee. It is your Father s good 
 pleasure to give you the kingdom. You have not 
 chosen me, but 1 have chosen you. I have called 
 thee by thy name, thou art mine. Before thou wast 
 formed in the belly, 1 knew thee," &c. No supposed 
 communion and conversation with God carried on 
 in this way; no such supposed tasting of the love of 
 Christ But the way he was satisfied of his own 
 good estate, even to the entire abolishing of fear, 
 was by feeling within himself the lively actings of a 
 lioly temper and heavenly disposition, the vigorous 
 exercises of that divine love y which cast out fear. 
 This was the way he had full satisfaction soon alter 
 his conversion, (see his diary on October Ifc and 19, 
 1740.) And we find no other way of satisfaction 
 through his whole life afterwards; and this he abun 
 dantly declared to be the way, the only way that he 
 had complete satisfaction, when he looked death in 
 the face, in its near approaches. 
 
 Some of the pretenders to an immediate witness by 
 suggestion, and defenders of it, with an assuming con 
 fidence, would bear us in hand, that there is no full 
 assurance without it; and that the way of being satis 
 fied by signs, and arguing an interest in Christ from 
 sa nctification, if it will keep men quiet in life and 
 
REFLECTIONS. 
 
 health, yet will never do when they come to die; then 
 (they say) men must have immediate witness, or else 
 he in a dreadful uncertainty. But Mr. Brainei d s 
 experience is a confutation of ihis; for in him we 
 have an instance of one that possessed as constant 
 and unshaken an assurance, through the course of 
 his life, after conversion, as perhaps can be produced 
 in this age; which yet he obtained and enjoyed \\ith- 
 out any such sort of testimony, and without all man 
 ner of appearance of it, or pretence to it; yea v\hilc 
 utterly disclaiming any such thing and declaring 
 against it: and one whose assurance we need not 
 scruple to ailirrn, has as fair a claim, and as just a 
 pretension to truth and genuineness, as any that the 
 pretenders to immediate witness can produce: and 
 not only an instance of one that had such an assur 
 ance in life, but had it in a constant manner in his 
 last illness; and particularly in the latter stages of it, 
 through those last months of his life, therein deatk 
 was more sensibly approaching, without the least 
 lyc of life: and had it too in its fulness, and in the 
 height of its ex Q * ****., mui^i* i.!ns* yii*tti i-^i* 7 
 that he had in this space of time; when brought from 
 time to time to the very brink of the grave, expect 
 ing in a few minutes to be in eternity. lie had "tho 
 full assurance of hope, unto the end." When on the 
 v verge of eternity, he then declares his assurance to 
 be such as perfectly secluded all fear: and nut only 
 so, but it manifestly filled his soul with exceeding 
 joy: he declaring at the same time, that this his con 
 solation and good hope through grace arose wholly 
 from the evidence he had of his good estate, by what 
 he found of his sanctification, 01 the exercise of a 
 holy, heavenly temper of mind, supreme love to God, 
 &c. and not in the least from any immediate witness 
 by suggestion: yea, he declares that at these very 
 times he saw the awful delusion of that confidence 
 which is huilt on such a foundation, as well as of the 
 whole of that religion which it usually springs from, 
 or at least is the attendant of; and that his soul ab 
 horred those delusions: and he continued in this 
 
252 INFLECTIONS. 
 
 mind, often expressing it with much solemnity, even 
 till death. 
 
 Mr. Brai nerd s religion was not selfish and merce 
 nary, his Jove to God was primarily and principally 
 ior the supreme excellency of his own nature, and 
 not built on a preconceived notion that God loved /itwi, 
 had received him into favor, and had done great 
 things for him, or promised great things to him: so 
 his joy was joy in God, and not jn himself. We 
 see hy his diary how, from time to time, through 
 the course of his life, his soul was filled with ineffable 
 sweetness and comfort. But what was the spring of 
 this strung and abiding consolation? Not so much 
 the consideration of the sure grounds he had to think 
 that his state was good, that God had delivered him 
 from hell, and that heaven was his; or any thoughts 
 concerning his own distinguished, happy, and exalted 
 circumstances, as a high favorite of heaven: but the 
 sweet meditations and entertaining views he had 
 of divine things without himself; the affecting con 
 siderations and lively ideas of God s infinite glory, 
 Jttis unchangeable blessedness, his ouvercignty and 
 universal dominion; together with the sweet exercises 
 of love to God, giving himself up to him, abasing 
 himself before him, denying himself for him, de 
 pending upon him, acting for his glory, diligently 
 serving him; and the pleasing prospects or hopes 
 he had of a future advancement of the kingdom of 
 Christ, &c. 
 
 It appears plainly and abundantly all along, from 
 his conversion to his death, that that beauty, that sort 
 >f good, which was the great object of the new sense 
 of his mind, the new relish and appetite given 
 him in conversion, and thenceforward maintained 
 and increased in his heart, was holiness, conformity 
 to God, living to God, and glorifying him. This 
 was what drew his heart; this was the centre of his 
 soul; this was the ocean to which all the streams of his 
 religious affections tended: this was the object that 
 engaged his eager thirsting desires and earnest pur 
 suits: he knew no true excellency or happiness, but 
 
REFLECTIONS. 253 
 
 this: this was what he longed for most vehemently and 
 constantly on earth; and this was wiih him the beauty 
 and blessedness of heaven; which made him so much 
 and so often to long for that world of glory; it was to 
 be perfectly holy, and perfectly exercised in the holy 
 employments of heaven; thus to glorify God and en 
 joy him for ever. 
 
 His religious illuminations, affections, and comfort 
 seemed to a great degree to be attended with evan 
 gelical humiliation; consisting in a sense of his own 
 utter insufficiency, despicable ness, and odious ness; 
 with an answerable disposition and frame of heart. 
 How deeply affected was he almost continually with 
 his great defects in religion; with his vast distance 
 from that spirituality and holy frame of mind that 
 became him; with his ignorance, pride, dead ness, un 
 steadiness, barrenness? He was not only affected with 
 the remembrance of his Cornier sinfulness before his 
 conversion, hut with a sense of his present vilcncss 
 and pollution. He was not only disposed to think 
 meanly of himself as before God, and in comparison of 
 him, but amongst men, and as compared with them. 
 He was apt to think other saints better than he; yea, 
 to look on himself as the meanest and least of saints; 
 yea, very often, as the vilest and worst of mankind. 
 And notwithstanding his great attainments in spirit 
 ual knowledge, yet we find there is scarce any thing 
 that he is more frequently affected and abased with 
 a sense of, than his ignorance. 
 
 How eminently did he appear to be of a meek and 
 quiet spirit, resembling the lamb-like, dove-like 
 Spirit of Jesus Christ! How full of love, meekness, 
 quietness, forgiveness, and mercy! His love was 
 not merely a fondness and zeal for a party, but an 
 universal benevolence; very often exercised in the 
 most sensible and ardent love to his greatest oppo 
 se rs and enemies. His love and meekness were not 
 a mere pretence, and outward profession and show; 
 but they were effectual things manifested in expen 
 sive and painful deeds of love and kindness; and 
 in a meek behavior, readily confessing faults under 
 
the greatest trials, and humbling himself even at the 
 feet of those from whom he supposed he had suffered 
 most; and from time to time very frequently praying 
 for his enemies, abhorring the thought of bitterness 
 and resentment towards them. 1 scarcely know 
 where to look for any parallel instance of self-denial, 
 in these respects and the present age. He was a 
 person of great zeal: but how did he abhor a bitter 
 zeal, and lament it where he saw it; and though he 
 was once drawn into some degrees of it, by the force 
 of prevailing example, as it were in his childhood; yet 
 how did he go about with a heart bruised and broken 
 in pieces for it all his life after! 
 
 Of how soft and tender a spirit was he! How far 
 were his experiences, hopes, and joys, from a tenden 
 cy finally to stupify and harden him, to lessen con 
 victions and tenderness of conscience, to cause him 
 to be less affected with present and past sins, and less 
 conscientious with respect to future sins, more 
 easy in the neglect of duties that are troublesome and 
 inconvenient, more slow and partial in complying 
 \vitb difficult commands, less apt to be alarmed at 
 the appearance of his own defects and transgressions, 
 more easily induced to a compliance with carnal ap 
 petites! On the contrary, how tender was his con* 
 science! How apt was his heart to smite him! How 
 easily and greatly was he alarmed at the appearance 
 of moral evil! How great and constant was his jeal 
 ousy over his own heart! How strict his care and 
 watchfulness against sin! How deep and sensible 
 were the wounds that sin made in his conscience! 
 Those evils that are generally accounted small, were- 
 almost an insupportable burden to him; such as his 
 inward deficiencies, his having no more love to God, 
 finding within himself any slackness or dulness in 
 religion, any unsteadiness or wandering frame of 
 mind, &c. how did the consideration of such things as 
 these oppress and abase him and fill him with inward 
 shame and confusion! His love and hope, though 
 they were such as cast out a servile fear of bell yet 
 they were such as were attended with, and abun- 
 
BEBXECTION*, 
 
 dantly cherished and promoted a reverential, filial 
 fear of God, a dread of sin, and of God s holy dis- 
 ph asure. His joy seemed truly to be a rejoicing 
 with trembling. His assurance and comfort differed 
 greatly from a false enthusiastic confidence and joy, 
 in that it promoted and maintained mourning for sin: 
 hoiy mourning with him, was not only the work of an 
 hour or a day, at his first conversion; but sorrow for 
 sin was like a wound constantly running; he was a 
 mourner for sin all his days. He did not after he 
 received comfort and full satisfaction of the forgiveness 
 of all his sins, and the safety of his state, forget his 
 past sins, the sins of his youth, that w r ere committed 
 before his conversion, but the remembrance of them, 
 from time to time, revived in his heart, with renewed 
 grief. That in Ezek. xvi, 63, was evidently fulfilled 
 in him, That thou mayest remember, and be con 
 founded, and never open thy mouth any more, be 
 cause of thy shame; when I am pacified toward thee 
 for all that thou hast done. And how lastingly 
 did the sins that he committed after his conversion, 
 affect and break his heart! If he did any thing 
 whereby he thought he had in any respect dishonored 
 God, and wounded the interest of religion; he had 
 never done with calling it to mind with sorrow and 
 bitterness; though he was Assured that God had for 
 given it, yet he never forgave himself: his past sor 
 rows and fears made no satisfaction with him; but 
 till the wound renews and bleeds afresh, again and 
 again. And his present sins that he daily found in 
 himself, were an occasion of daily sensible and deep 
 sorrow of heart. 
 
 His religion did not consist in unaccountable flights 
 and vehement pangs; suddenly rising and suddenly 
 falling; at some turns exalted almost to the third 
 heavens, and then at other turns negligent, vain, 
 carnal, and swallowed up, with the world, for days 
 and weeks, if not months together. His religion 
 was not like a blazing meteor, or like a flaming 
 comet (or a wandering star, as the apostle Jude 
 calls it, verse IS,) flying through the firmanent with 
 
258 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 a bright train, and then quickly going out in perfect 
 darkness; but more like the steady lights of heaven, 
 that are constant principles of light though some 
 times hid with clouds: nor like a land tlood, which 
 flows far and wide, with a rapid stream, bearing 
 down all afoi-e it, and then dried up; but more like 
 a stream fed by living springs; which though some 
 times increased by showers, and at other times di 
 minished by drought, yet is a constant stream. 
 
 "His religious affections and joys were not like 
 those of some, who have rapture and mighty emotions 
 from time to time in company; but have very little 
 affection in retirement and secret places. Though 
 ho was of a very sociable temper, and loved the 
 company of saints, and delighted very much in re 
 ligious conversation, and in social worship; yet his 
 warmest affections, and their greatest effects on ani 
 mal nature, and his sweetest joys, were in his closet 
 devotions, and solitary transactions between God and 
 his own soul; as is very observable through his 
 whole course, from his conversion to his death. He 
 delighted greatly in sacred retirements; and loved to 
 get quite away from all the world, to converse with 
 God alone in secret duties. 
 
 Mr. Brainerd s experiences and comforts were 
 very far from being like t^se of some persons, which 
 are attended with a spiritual satiety, and put an end 
 to their religious desires and longings, at least to the 
 edge arid ardency of them; resting satisfied in their 
 own attainments and comforts, as having obtained 
 their chief end, which is to extinguish their fears of 
 hell, and give them confidence of the favor of God. 
 How far were his religious affections, refreshments, 
 and satisfactions, from such an operation and influ 
 ence as this! On the contrary how were they always 
 attended with longings and thhstings alter greater 
 degrees of conformity to God! And the greater and 
 sweeter his comforts were, the more vehement were 
 his desires after holiness. For it is to be observed, 
 that his longings were not so much after joyful dis 
 coveries of God s love, and clear views of his title to 
 
REFLECTIONS. 257 
 
 future advancement and eternal honors in heaven; as 
 alter more of present holiness, greater spirituality, 
 an heart more engaged for God, to love, exalt, and 
 depend on him: and ability better to serve him, to do 
 more for his glory, $nd to do all that he did with 
 more of a regard to Christ as his righteousness and 
 strength; and after the enlargement arid advance 
 ment of Christ s kingdom in the earth. And his de 
 sires were not idle wish ings and wouldings, but such 
 as were powerful and effectual, to animate him to the 
 earnest eagerpursuit of these things, with utmost dili 
 gence and unfainting labor and self-denial. His com 
 forts never put an end to his seeking after God, and 
 striving to obtain his grace; but on the contrary, 
 greatly engaged and enlarged him therein. 
 
 His religion did not consist only in experience, 
 without practice. All his inward illuminations, af 
 fections, and comforts seemed to have a direct tend 
 ency to practice, and to issue in it, and this not 
 merely a practice negatively good, free from gross 
 acts of irreligion and immorality; but a practice 
 ^iti-cely holy and Ch;j 8nari . j n a "serious, "devout, 
 humble, meek, merciful, charitable, and beneficent 
 conversation; making the service of God, and our 
 Lord Jesus Christ, the great business of life, which 
 he was devoted to, and pursued with the greatest 
 earnestness and diligence to the end of his days, 
 through all trials. In him was to be seen the right 
 way of being lively in religion: his liveliness in re 
 ligion did not consist merely or mainly in his being 
 lively with the tongue, but in deed; not in being for 
 ward in profession and outward show, and abundant 
 in declaring his own experiences; but chiefly in be 
 ing active and abundant in the labors and duties of 
 religion: "not slothful in business, but fervent in 
 spirit, serving the Lord, and serving his generation, 
 according to the will of God. 
 
 iiy these things, many high pretenders to religion 
 and professors of extraordinary spiritual experience, 
 may be sensible, that Mr. Urainerd did greatly con 
 demn their kind of religion; and that not only in 
 
258 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 word, but by example, both living ana dying; as the 
 whole series of his Christian experience and practice, 
 from his conversion to his death, appears a constant 
 condemnation of it. 
 
 It cannot he objected, that &e reason why he so 
 much disliked the religion of thase pretenders, and why 
 his own so much differed from it, was, that his expe 
 riences were not clear. There is no room to say, they 
 were otherwise, in any respect, in \vhich clearness 
 of experience has been wont to be insisted on; 
 Whether it be the clearness of their nature, or of their 
 order, and the method his soul was at first brought 
 to rest and comfort in his conversion. 1 am tar 
 from thinking (and so was he) that clearness of the 
 order of experiences, is, in any measure, of equal im 
 portance with the clearness of their nature: L have 
 sufficiently declared in my discourse on religious 
 affections (which he expressly approved of and recom 
 mended.) that 1 do not suppose, a sensible distinct 
 ness of the steps of the spirit s operation and method 
 of successive convictions and illuminations, is a nec 
 essary requisite to person 4 * lciu received hi ft:Jl 
 charity 9 as true saints; provided the nature of the 
 tilings they profess be right, and their practice 
 agreeable. Nevertheless, it is observable -(which cuts 
 off all objection, from such as would he most unreason 
 ably disposed to object and cavil in the present cas\) 
 HO it was, that Mr. I5iainerd s experiences were not 
 only clear in the latler respect, but remarkably so in 
 the former: so that there is not perhaps one instance 
 in five hundred true converts, that on this account 
 can be paralleled with him. 
 
 It cannot be pretended, that the reason why he so 
 much abhorred and condemned the notions and ex 
 periences of those whose Jirst faith consists in believ 
 ing that Christ is theirs, and that Christ died for them! 
 without any previous experience of union of heart to 
 him, for his excellency, as he is in himself, and not 
 for his supposed love to them; and who judge of 
 their interest in Christ, their justification, and God s 
 love to them, not by their sanctification, and the ex- 
 
REFLECTIONS^ 259 
 
 ercises and fruits of grace, Ihit by a supposed imme 
 diate witness of the spirit by inward suggestion: I 
 say, it cannot be pretended, that the reason why he 
 so much detested and condemned such opinions and ex 
 periences, was, that he was of a too legal spirit; either 
 that he never was dead to the law, never experienced 
 a thorough work of conviction, was never fully 
 brought off from his own righteousness, and wearied 
 from the old covenant, by a thorough legal humiliation; 
 or that afterwards, he had no great degree of evan 
 gelical humiliation, not living in a deep sense of his 
 own emptiness, wretchedness, poverty, and absolute 
 dependance on the mere grace of God through Christ. 
 For his convictions of sin, preceding his first conso 
 lations in Christ, were exceedingly deep and thor 
 ough; his trouble and exercise of mind, by a sense 
 of sin and misery, very great and long continued; arid 
 the light let into his mind at his conversion, and in 
 progressive sanctification, appears to have had iis 
 genuine humbling influence upon him, to have kept 
 him low in his own eyes, not confiding in himself, but 
 in Christ, Jiving by the faith of the Son of God, and 
 looking for the mercy of the Lord Jesus to eternal 
 life. 
 
 Nor can it be pretended, that the reason why he 
 condemned these, and other things, which this sort 
 of people call the very height of vital religion and 
 the power of godliness, was, that he was a dead 
 Christian, and lived in the dark, (as they express 
 themselves;) that his experiences, though they might 
 be true, were not great; that he did not live near to 
 God, had but a small acquaintance with him, and 
 had but a dim sight of spiritual things. If any, 
 after they have read the preceding account of Mr. 
 Brainerd s life, will venture to pretend thus, they will 
 only show that they themselves are in the dark, and 
 do indeed "put darkness for light, and light for 
 darkness." 
 
 This history of Mr. Brainerd may help us to make 
 distinctions among the religious affections, and re 
 markable impressions made on the minds of persons 
 
260 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 in a time of great awakening, find revival of religion; 
 and may convince us, that there are not only dis 
 tinctions in theory, invented to save the credit of 
 pretended revivals of religion, and what is called the 
 experience of the operations of the Spirit; but distinc 
 tions that do actually take place in the course of 
 events, and have a real and evident foundation in fact. 
 
 Not only do the opposers of all religion, consisting 
 in powerful operations and affections, thus confound 
 things; but many of the pretenders to such religion 
 do so. They that have been the subjects of some 
 sort of vehement, but vain operations on their mind; 
 when they hear the relation of the experiences of 
 some real and eminent Christians, they say, their 
 experiences are of the same sort: so they say, they 
 are just likp the experiences of eminent Christians 
 in former times, which we have printed accounts of. 
 So, I doubt riot, but there are many deluded people, 
 if they should read the preceding account of Mr. 
 Brainerd s life, who reading without much under 
 standing or careful observation, would say, without 
 hesitation, that some things which they have met 
 with, are of the very same kind with what he ex 
 presses: when the agreement is only in some gen 
 eral circumstances, or some particular things that 
 are superficial, and belonging as it were to the pro 
 fession and outside of religion; but the inward tem 
 per of mind, and the fruits in practice, are as oppo 
 site and distant as east and west. 
 
 Many honest^ good people also, and true Christians, 
 do not very well know how to make a difference. 
 The glittering appearance and glaring show of false 
 religion dazzles their eyes; and they sometimes are 
 so deluded by it, that they look on some of these im 
 pressions, which hypocrites tell of, as the brightest 
 experiences. And though they have experienced 
 no such things themselves, they think, it is because 
 they are vastly lower in attainments, and but babes, 
 in comparison with these flaming Christians. Yea, 
 sometimes from their differing so much from those 
 who make so great a show, they doubt whether thejr 
 
REFLECTIONS. 261 
 
 have any grace at all. And it is a harcf thing, to 
 bring many well-meaning people to make proper 
 distinctions in this case; and especially to maintain 
 and stand by them, through a certain weakness they 
 unhappily labor of, whereby they are liable to be 
 overcome with the glare of outward appearances. 
 Thus, if in a sedate hour they are by reasoning 
 brought to allow such and such distinctions, yet the 
 next time they come in the way of the great show of 
 false religion; the dazzling appearance swallows 
 them up, and they are carried away. Thus the 
 devil by his cunning artifices, easily dazzles the 
 feeble sight of men, and puts them beyond a capac 
 ity of a proper exercise of consideration, or heark 
 ening to the dictates of calm (bought, and cool under 
 standing. When they perceive the great affection, 
 earnest talk, strong voice, assured looks, vast con 
 fidence, and bold assertions, of these empty assum 
 ing pretenders, they are overborne, lose the pos 
 session of their judgment, and say, "Surely these 
 men are in the right, God is with them of a truth;" 
 and so they are carried away, not with light and 
 reason, but (like children) as it were with a strong 
 wind. 
 
 This confounding all things together, that have a 
 fair show, is but acting the part of a child, that going 
 into a shop, where a variety of wares are exposed 
 for sale (all of a shining appearance; some vessels o 
 gold ana silver, and some diamonds and other pre 
 cious stones; and other things that are toys of little 
 value, which are of some base metal gilt or glass 
 polished, and painted with curious colors, or cut like 
 diamonds,) should esteem all alike, and give as great 
 a price for the vile as for the precious; or it is like 
 the conduct of some unskilful rash person who find 
 ing himself deceived by some of the wares he had 
 bought at that shop, should at once conclude all he 
 there saw was of no value; and pursuant to such a 
 conclusion, when afterwards he has true gold and 
 diamonds offered him, enough to enrich him, and en- 
 23 
 
262 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 able him to live like a prince all his days lie should 
 throw it all into the sea. 
 
 But we must get into another way. The want of 
 distinguishing in things that appertain to experi 
 mental religion, is one of the chief miseries of the 
 professing world. It is attended with very many 
 most dismal consequences: multitudes of souls are 
 fatally deluded about themselves, and their own 
 state; and so arc eternally undone: hypocrites are 
 confirmed in their delusions, and exceedingly puffed 
 up with pride; many sincere Christians are dread 
 fully perplexed, darkened, tempted, and drawn aside 
 from the way of duty; and sometimes sadly tainted 
 with false religion, to the great dishonor of Chris 
 tianity, and hurt of their own souls: some of the 
 most dangerous and pernicious enemies of religion 
 in the world (though they are called bright Chris 
 tians) are encouraged and honored; who ought to be 
 discountenanced and shunned by every body: and 
 prejudices arc begotten and confirmed in vast multi 
 tudes, against every thing wherein the power and 
 essence of godliness consists; and in the end Deism 
 and Atheism are promoted. 
 
 The foregoing account of Mr. Brainerd s life may 
 afford matter of conviction, that there is indeed such 
 a tiling as true experimental religion, arising from 
 immediate divine influences, snpernaturally enligh 
 tening and convincing the mind, and powerfully im 
 pressing, quickening, sanctifying, and governing tho 
 heart: which religion is indeed an amiable thing, of 
 happy tendency, and of no hurtful consequence to 
 human society; notwithstanding there having been 
 so many pretences and appearances of what is called 
 experimental vital religion, that have proved to be 
 nothing but vain, pernicious enthusiasm. 
 
 If any insist, that Mr. Brainerd s religion was 
 enthusiasm, and nothing but a strange heat and blind 
 fervor of mind, arising from the strong fancies and 
 dreams of a notional whimsical brain; 1 would ask, 
 if it be so, that such thiugs as these are the fruits of 
 enthusiasm, viz. a great degree of honesty and sim- j 
 
[REFLECTIONS. 63 
 
 plicity, sincere and earnest desires and endeavors to 
 know and do whatever is right, and to avoid every 
 thing that is wrong; an high degree of love to God, 
 delight in the perfections of his nature, placing the 
 happiness of life in him; not only in contemplating 
 him, hut in being active in pleasing, and serving 
 him; a firm and undouhting belief in the Messiah, as 
 the Savior of the world, the great Prophet of God, 
 and King of God s church; together with great love 
 to him, delight and complacence in the way of sal 
 vation by him, and longing for the enlargement of 
 his kingdom; earnest desires that God may be glori 
 fied and the Messiah s kingdom advanced, whatever 
 instruments are made use of; uncommon resignation 
 to the will of God, and that under vast trials; great 
 and universal benevolence to mankind, reaching all 
 sorts of persons without distinction, manifested in 
 sweetness of speech and behavior, kind treatment, 
 mercy, liberality, and earnest seeking (he good of 
 the souls and bodies of men; attended with extraor 
 dinary humility, meekness, forgiveness of injuries, 
 and love to enemies; and a great abhorrence of a con 
 trary spirit and practice; not only as appearing in 
 others, but whereinsoever it had appeared in him 
 self; causing the most bitter repentance, and broken- 
 ness of heart on account of any past instances of 
 such a conduct: a modest, discreet, and decent de- 
 porfment, among superiors, inferiors, and equals; a 
 most diligent improvement of time, and earnest care 
 to lose no part of it; great watchfulness against all 
 sorts of sin, of heart, speech, and action: and this 
 example and these endeavors attended with most 
 happy fruits, and blessed effects on others, in hu 
 manizing, civilizing, and wonderfully reforming and 
 transforming some of the most brutish savages; idle, 
 immoral, drunkards, murderers, gross idolaters, and 
 vvizzards; bringing them to permanent sobriety, dil 
 igence, devotion, honesty, conscientiousness, and 
 charity; and the foregoing amiable virtues arid suc 
 cessful labors all ending at last in a marvellous 
 peace, unmoveable stability, calmness, and resigna- 
 
264 EFLECTIO>?. 
 
 tion, in the sensible approaches of death: with long 
 ing for the heavenlv state; not only for the honors 
 ami circumstantial advantages of it, but above all for 
 the moral perfection, and holy and blessed em] 
 ments of it: and these things in a person indisputa 
 bly of good understanding and judgment: i say, if 
 all these tilings are the fruits of enthusiasm, why 
 should not enthusiasm be thought a desirable and ex 
 cellent thing? fur what can true refti . what can 
 the best philosophy do more? if vapors and whimsy 
 will bring men to the most thorough virtue, to the 
 
 benign and fruitful morality: and will maintain 
 it through a course of life, (attended with many 
 trials) without affectation or self-exaltation, and with 
 an honest constant bearing testimony against the 
 wildness, the extravagances, the bitter zeal, assum 
 ing: behavior,and separating spirit of enthusiasts; and 
 will do all this the more effectually, than any thing 
 else has ever done in any plain known instance that 
 can be produced; if it be so, I say, what cai;^: 
 
 the world to prize and pray for this blessed 
 whimsicalness, and these benign sort of vapors? 
 
 The preceding serves to confirm those 
 
 doctrines usually called the doctrines of grace. For 
 if it be allowed that there is truth, substance, or ral- 
 
 the main of Mr. Brainerd s religion, it will un- 
 edly follow, that those doctrines are cli 
 
 is e\ident, that the whole of it, from begin 
 ning to end, is according to that scheme of tl. ing- 
 built on those apprehension?, notion-, 
 that are produced and established in the mind by 
 those doctrines. He was brought by d<. . 
 kind to hi* awakening, and deep concern about things 
 of a spiritual and eternal nature; and by these doc 
 trines his convictions were maintained and carried 
 on; and his conversion was evidently altogether 
 agreeable to this scheme, but by no means ag! \ 
 \\"ith the contrary, and ur tent with the 
 
 Arminian notion of conversion or repentance. His 
 conversion was plainly founded in a clear strong con- 
 
 the truth of 
 
REFLECTIONS, 65 
 
 those things appertaining to these doctrines, which 
 Arminians most object against, and which his own 
 mind had contended most about. And his conversion 
 was so confirming; and perfecting of moral principles 
 and habits, by use and practice, and his own labor in 
 an industrious disciplining himself, together with the 
 concurring suggestions and conspiring aids of God s 
 Spirit; but entirely a supernatural work, at once 
 turning him from darkness to marvellous light, and 
 from the power of sin to the dominion of divine and 
 holy principles; an effect in no regard produced by 
 his strength or labor, or obtained by his virtue; and 
 not accomplished till he was first brought to a full 
 conviction, that all his own virtue, strength, labors, 
 and endeavors, could IICYIT avail any thing to the 
 producing or procuring this effect. 
 
 A very little while before, his mind was full of the 
 same cavils against the doctrines of God s sove 
 reign grace, which are made by Arminians; and his 
 heart even full of a raging opposition to them. And 
 God was pleased to perform this good work in him 
 just after a full end had been put to this cavilling and 
 opposition; after he was entirely convinced, that he 
 was dead in sin, and was in the hands of God, as the 
 absolutely sovereign, unobliged, sole disposer and 
 author of true holiness. God s showing him mercy 
 at such a time, is a confirmation, that this was a 
 preparation for mercy; and consequently, that these 
 tilings which he was convinced of were true: while 
 he opposed these tilings, he was the subject of no 
 such mercy; though he so earnestly sought it, and 
 prayed for it with so much painfulness, care, and 
 strictness in religion: but when once his opposition 
 is fully subdued, and he is brought to submit to the 
 truths, which he before had opposed, with full con 
 viction, then the mercy he sought for is granted, with 
 abundant light, great evidence, and exceeding joy, 
 and he reaps the sweet fruit of it all his life after, 
 and in the valley of the shadow of death. 
 
 In his conversion, he was brought to see the 
 glory of that way of salvation by Christ, that is 
 *23 
 
&66 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 taught in what are called the doctrines of grace; and 
 thenceforward, with unspeakable joy and compla 
 cence, to embrace and acquiesce in that way of salva 
 tion. He was in his conversion, in all respects, 
 brought to those views, and that state of mind which 
 these doctrines show to be necessary. And if his 
 conversion was any real conversion, or any thing 
 besides a mere whim, and if the religion of his life 
 was any thing else but a series of freaks of a whim- 
 sical mind, then this one grand principle, on which 
 depends the whole difference between (Jalvinists and 
 Arminians, is undeniable, via. that the grace or 
 virtue of truly good men, not only differs from the 
 virtue of others in degree, but even in nature and 
 kind. If ever Mr. Brainerd was truly turned from 
 sin to God at all, or ever became truly religious, none 
 can reasonably doubt but that his conversion was at 
 the time when he supposed it to be: the change he 
 then experienced, was evidently the greatest moral 
 change that ever he passed under; and he was then 
 apparently first brought to that kind of religion, 
 that remarkable new habit and temper of mind,which 
 he held all his life after. The narration shows it to be 
 different in nature and kind, from all that he ever was 
 the subject of before. It was evidently wrought 
 at once without fitting and preparing his mind, by 
 gradually convincing it more and more of the same 
 truths, and bringing it nearer and nearer to such a 
 temper: for it was soon after his mind had been re 
 markably full of blasphemy, and a vehement exer 
 cise of sensible enmity against God, and great oppo 
 sition to those truths, which he was now brought 
 with his whole soul to embrace, and rest in, as divine 
 and glorious, and to place his happiness in the 
 contemplation and improvement of. Arid he himself 
 (who was surely best able to judge) declares, that the 
 Dispositions and affections, which were then given 
 him, and thenceforward maintained in him, were 
 most, sensibly and certainly, perfectly different, in 
 their nature, from all that ever he was the subject of 
 before, or that he had ever any conception of. This 
 
REFLECTIONS. 267 
 
 he ever stood to, and was peremptory in (as what he 
 certainly knew) even to his death. He must be 
 looked upon as capable of judging: he had opportu 
 nity to know: he had practised a great deal of relig 
 ion before, was exceedingly strict and conscientious, 
 and had continued so for a long time: had various 
 religious affections, with which he often flattered 
 himself, and sometimes pleased himself as being now 
 in a good estate: and after he had those new experi 
 ences, that began in his conversion, they were contin 
 ued to the end of his life; long enough for him thor 
 oughly to observe their nature, and compare them, 
 with what had been before. Doubtless he was 
 compos mentis; and was at least one of so good an 
 understanding and judgment, as to be pretty well ca 
 pable of discerning and comparing the things that 
 passed in his own mind. 
 
 It is further observable, that his religion all along 
 operated in such a manner as tended to confirm his 
 mind in the doctrines of God s absolute sovereignty, 
 man s universal and entire dependence on God s 
 power and grace, &c. The more his religion pre 
 vailed in his heart, and the fuller he was of divine 
 love, and of clear and delightful views of spiritual 
 things, and the more his heart was engaged in God s 
 service; the more sensible he was of the certainty 
 and the excellency and importance of these truths, 
 and the more he was affected with them, and rejoiced 
 in them. And he declares particularly, that when 
 he lay for a long while on the verge of the eternal 
 world, often expecting to be in that world in a few 
 minutes, yet at the same time enjoying great serenity 
 of mind, and clearness of thought, and being most 
 apparently in a peculiar manner at a distance from 
 an enthusiastical frame, he "at that time saw clearly 
 the truth of those great doctrines of the Gospel, which 
 are justly styled THE DOCTRINES OP GRACE, and 
 never felt himself so capable of demonstrating the 
 truth of them." 
 
 So that it was very evident, Mr. Brainerd s religion 
 was wholly correspondent to what is called the CAJL- 
 
268 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 VINISTICAL scheme, and was the effect of those doc 
 trines applied to his heart: and certainly it cannot 
 be denied, that the effect was good, unless we turn 
 Atheists or Deists. 1 would ask, whether there be 
 any such thing, in reality, as Christian devotion? 
 If there be, what is it? what is its nature? and what 
 its just measure? should it not be in a great degree? 
 We read abundantly in Scripture, of "loving God with 
 all the heart, with all the soul, with all the mind, and 
 with all the strength, of delighting in God, of rejoicing 
 in the Lord, rejoicing with joy unspeakable, and full 
 of glory, the soul s magnifying the Lord, thirsting for 
 God, hungering and thirsting after righteousness, the 
 soul s breaking for the longing it hath to God s judg 
 ments, praying to God with groanings that cannot be 
 uttered, mourning for sin with a broken heart and con 
 trite spirit," &c. How full is the book of Psalms, and 
 other par s of Scripture, of such things as these! 
 Now wherein do these things as expressed by and ap- 
 pearinginMr. tJrainerd, either the things themselves, 
 or their effects and fruits, differ from the Scripture 
 representations? ^These things ho was brought to 
 by that strange ami wonderful transformation of the 
 man, which he called his conversion. And does 
 not (his well agree with what is so often said in the 
 Old Testament and New, concerning the "giving of a 
 new heart, creating a right spirit, a being renewed in 
 the spirit of the mind, a being sanctified throughout, 
 becoming a new creature," &c. Now where is there 
 to be found an Arminian conversion or repentance, 
 consisting in so great and admirable a change? Can 
 the Arminians produce an instance, within this age, 
 and so plainly within our reach and view, of such a 
 reformation, such a transformation of a man, to 
 Scriptural devotion, heavenly minded ness, and true 
 Christian morality, in one that before lived without 
 these things, on the foot of their principles, and 
 through the influence of their doctrines? 
 
 And here, is worthy to be considered, not only the 
 effect of Calvinistical doctrines (as they are called) on 
 Mr. Brainerd himself, but also the effect of the same 
 
REFLECTIONS. 269 
 
 doctrines, as taught and inculcated by him, on others. 
 It is abundantly pretended and asserted of late, that 
 these doctrines tend to undermine the very founda 
 tions of all religion and morality, and to enervate and 
 vacate all reasonable motives to the exercise and 
 practice of them, and lay invincible stumbling blocks 
 before infidels, to hinder their embracing Christian 
 ity; and that the contrary doctrines are the fruitful 
 principles of virtue and goodness, set religion on its 
 right basis, represent it in an amiable light, give its 
 motives their full force, and recommend it to the rea 
 son and common sense of mankind. But where can 
 they find an instance of so great and signal an effect 
 of their doctrines, in bringing infidels who were at 
 such a distance from all that is civil, human, sober, 
 rational, and Christian, and so full of inveterate 
 prejudices against these things, to such a degree of 
 humanity, civility, exercise of reason, self-denial, 
 and Christian virtue? Arminians place religion in 
 morality: let them bring an instance of their doc 
 trines producing such a transformation of a people in 
 point of morality. It is strange if the all-wise God so 
 orders things in his providence, that reasonable and 
 proper means, and his own means, which he himself 
 has appointed, should in no known remarkable in 
 stance be instrumental to produce so good an effect; 
 an effect so agreeable to his own word and mind, and 
 that very effect for which he appointed these excellent 
 means; that they should not be so successful, as those 
 means which are not his own but very contrary to 
 them, and of a contrary tendency: means that are in 
 themselves very absurd, and tend to root all religion 
 and virtue out of the world, to promote and establish 
 infidelity, and to lay an insuperable stumbling- block 
 before pagans, to hinder their embracing the Gospel: 
 1 say, if this be the true state of the case, it is cer 
 tainly wonderful, and an event worthy of some at 
 tention. 
 
 Is there not much in the preceding memoirs of Mr. 
 Brainerd to teach, and excite to duty, us who are 
 called to the work of the ministry, and all that are 
 
270 REFLECTIONS* 
 
 candidates for that great work? What a deep sense 
 did he seem to have of the greatness and importance 
 of that work, and with what weight did it lie on his 
 mind! how sensible was he of his own insufficiency 
 for this work; and how great was his dependence on 
 God s su flic iency! how solicitous, that he might he 
 fitted for it! and to this end, how much time did he 
 spend in prayer and fasting, as well as reading and 
 meditation; giving himself to these things. how did he 
 dedicate his whole life, all his powers and talents to 
 God; and forsake and renounce the world, with all 
 its pleasing and ensnaring enjoyments, that he 
 might be wholly at liberty ta serve Christ in this 
 work; and to "please him who had chosen him to be 
 a soldier under the captain of our salvation!" With 
 what solicitude, solemnity, and diligence did he de 
 vote himself to God our Savior, and seek his presence, 
 and blessing in secret, at the time of his ordination! 
 and how did his whole heart appear to be constantly 
 engaged, his whole time employed, and his whole 
 strength spent in the business he then solemnly un 
 dertook and was publicly set apart to: and his history 
 show s us the right way to success in the work of the 
 ministry. He sought it, as a resolute soldier seeks 
 victory, in a .siege or battle; or as a man that runs 
 a race, for a great prize. Animated with love to 
 Christ and souls, how did he "labor always fervent 
 ly," not only in word and doctrine, in public and 
 private, but in prayers day and night, "wrestling 
 with God 1 in secret, and "travailing in birth," with 
 unutterable groans and agonies, "until Christ were 
 formed" in the hearts of the people to whom he was 
 sent! how did he thirst for a blessing on his ministry; 
 and "watch for souls as one that must give an ac 
 count!" how did he "go forth in the strength of the 
 Lord God;" seeking and depending on a special in 
 fluence of the Spirit to assist and succeed him! and 
 what was the happy fruit at last, though after long 
 waiting, and many dark and discouraging appearan 
 ces! like a true son of Jacob, he persevered in wrest- 
 
REFLECTIONS. 271 
 
 ling, through all the darkness of the night, until the 
 breaking of the day. 
 
 And his example of lahoring, praying, denying 
 himself, and enduring hardness, with unfaintirig res 
 olution and patience, and his faithful, vigilant, and 
 prudent conduct in many other respects, (which it 
 would he too long now particularly to recite,) may 
 afford instruction to missionaries in particular. 
 
 There is much in the preceding account to excite 
 and encourage God s people to earnest prayers and 
 endeavors for the advancement and enlargement of 
 the kingdom of Christ in the world. Mr. Braincrd 
 setns an excellent example in this respect: he sought 
 the prosperity of Zion with all his might: he prefer 
 red Jerusalem ahove his chief joy. How did his soul 
 long for it, and pant after it! and how earnestly and 
 often did he wrestle with God for it! and how far did 
 he, in thrse desires and prayers, seem to he carried 
 heyond all private and selfish views! being animated 
 by a pure love to Christ, an earnest desire of his 
 glory, and a disinterested affection to the souls of 
 mankind. 
 
 The consideration of this not only ought to be an 
 incitement to the people of God, but may also be a 
 just encouragement to them, to be much in seeking and 
 praying for a general out-pouring of the Spirit of God, 
 and extensive revival of religion. 1 confess that 
 God s giving so much of a spirit of prayer for this 
 mercy to so eminent a servant of his, and exciting 
 him, in so extraordinary a manner, and with such 
 vehement thirstings of soul, to agonize in prayer for it, 
 from time to time, through the course of his life, is 
 one thing among others, which gives me great hope, 
 that God has a design of accomplishing something 
 very glorious for the interest of his church before long. 
 One such instance as this, I conceive, gives more en 
 couragement, than the common, cold, formal prayers 
 of thousands. As Mr. Brainerd s desires and prayers 
 for the coming of Christ s kingdom, were very spe 
 cial and extraordinary, so, 1 think, we may reason 
 ably hope, that the God, who excited those desires 
 
272 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 and prayers, will answer them, with something spe 
 cial and extraordinary. And in a particular manner, 
 do 1 think it worthy to be taken notice of for our en 
 couragement, that he had his heart (as he declared) 
 unusually, and beyond what had been before, drawn 
 out in longings and prayers for the flourishing of 
 Christ s kingdom on earth, when he was in the ap 
 proaches of death; and that with his dying breath 
 lie did as it were breathe out his departing soul into 
 the bosom of his Redeemer, in prayers and pantings 
 after this glorious event; expiring in a very great 
 hope that it would soon begin to be fulfilled. And I 
 wish that the thoughts which he in his dying state ex 
 pressed of that explicit agreement, and visible union 
 of God s people, in extraordinary prayer for a gener 
 al revival of religion, lately proposed in a memorial 
 from Scotland, which has been dispersed among us, 
 may be well considered by those that hitherto have 
 not seen fit to fall in with that proposal. But 1 for 
 bear to say any more on this head, having already 
 largely published my thoughts upon it, in a discourse 
 written on purpose to promote that affair; which, I 
 confess, I wish that every one of my readers might 
 be supplied with; not that my honor, but that this 
 excellent design might be promoted. 
 
 One thing more may not be nnprofitably ob 
 served in the preceding account of Mr. Brainerd: 
 and that is the special and remarkable disposal of di 
 vine providence, with regard to the circumstances of 
 his last sickness and death. 
 
 Though he had long been infirm, his constitution 
 being much broken by his fatigues and hardships; 
 and though he was often brought very low by 
 illness, before he left Kaunaumeek, and also while he 
 lived at the Forks of Delaware: yet his life was pre 
 served, till he had seen that which he had so long and 
 greatly desired and sought, a glorious work of grace 
 among the Indians, arid had received the wished for 
 blessing of God on his labors. Though as it were 
 in deaths oft," yet he lived to behold the happy 
 fruits of the long continued travail of his soul and 
 
REFLECTIONS, 
 
 labor of his body, in the wonderful conversion of 
 many of the Heathen, and the happy effect of it in the 
 great change of their conversation with many cir 
 cumstances which afford a fair prospect of the con 
 tinuance of God s blessing upon them, as may appear 
 by what I shall presently further observe. Thus he 
 did riot "depart* till his eyes had seen God s salva 
 tion." 
 
 Though it was the pleasure of God, that he should 
 be taken off from his labors among that people whom 
 God had made him a spiritual father to, who were so 
 dear to him, and whose spiritual welfare he was so 
 greatly concerned for; yet this was not before they 
 were well initiated and instructed in the Christian 
 religion, thoroughly weaned from their old heathen 
 ish and brutish notions and practices; and all their 
 prejudices, which tended to keep their minds un 
 settled, were fully removed; and they were confirm 
 ed and fixed in the Christian faith and manners* were 
 formed into a church, had ecclesiastical ordinances 
 and discipline introduced and settled; were brought 
 into a good way with respect to the education of 
 children, had a schoolmaster sent to them in provi 
 dence, excellently qualified for the business, and had 
 a school set up and established, in good order, among 
 them; had been well brought off from their former 
 idle, strolling, sottish way of living; had removed 
 from their former scattered uncertain habitations, 
 and were collected in a town by themselves, on a 
 good piece of land of their own; were introduced in 
 to the way of living by husbandry, and begun to ex 
 perience the benefits of it. These things were but 
 just brought to pass by his indefatigable application 
 and care, and then he was taken off from his work by 
 illness. If this had been but a little sooner, they would 
 not have been so well prepared for such a dispensa 
 tion; and it probably would have been unspeakably 
 more to the hurt of their spiritual interest, and of the 
 cause of Christianity among them. 
 
 The time and circumstances of his illness were so 
 ordered, that he had just opportunity to finish his 
 84 
 
2.74 KEFLECTIONS. 
 
 journal and prepare it for the press; giving an ac 
 count of the marvellous display of divine power and 
 grace among the Indians in New Jersey, and at the 
 Forks of Delaware: his doing which was a thing ot 
 great consequence, and therefore urged upon him by 
 the correspondents, who have honored his journal 
 with a preface. The world being 1 particularly and 
 justly informed of that affair by Mr. Brainerd before 
 his death, a foundation was hereby laid for a concern 
 in others for that cause, and proper care and meas 
 ures to be taken for the maintaining it after his 
 death. As it has actually proved to be of great in 
 fluence and benefit in this respect; it having excited 
 and engaged many in those parts, and also more 
 distant parts of America, to exert themselves for the 
 upholding and promoting so good and glorious a 
 work, remarkably opening their hearts and hands to 
 that end: and not only in America, but in Great 
 Britain, where that journal (which is the same that 
 I have earnestly recommended to my readers to pos 
 sess themselves of) has been an occasion of some 
 large benefactions, made for the promoting the 
 interest of Christianity among the Indians. If Mr. 
 Brainerd had been taken ill but a little sooner, he had 
 not been able to complete this his journal, and pre 
 pare a copy for the press. 
 
 He was not taken off from the work of the min 
 istry among his people, till his brother was in a capa 
 city and circumstances to succeed him in nis care of 
 them: who succeeds him in tUe like spirit, and under 
 whose prudent and faithful care his congregation has 
 flourished, and been very happy, since he left them; 
 and probably could not have been so well provided 
 for, otherwise. If Mr. Brainerd had been disabled 
 sooner, his brother would by no means have been 
 ready to stand up in bis place; having taken his 
 first degree at college but about that very time thaj 
 he was seized with his fatal consumption. 
 
 Though in that winter that he lay sick at Mr. 
 ^ in EUzabethtown, he continued for a 
 
INFLECTIONS. 275 
 
 long time in an extremely low state, so that his life 
 was almost despaired of, and his state was sometimes 
 such that it was hardly expected he would live a day 
 to an end; yet his life was spared a while longer; 
 lie lived to see his brother arrived in New Jersey, 
 being come to succeed him in the care of his Indians; 
 and he himself had opportunity to assist in his ex 
 amination and introduction into his business: and 
 to commit the conduct of his dear people to one 
 whom he well knew and could put confidence in, and 
 use freedom with in giving him particular instructions 
 and charges, and under whose care he could leave 
 his congregation with great cheerfulness. 
 
 The providence of God was remarkable in so or 
 dering of it, that before his death he should take a 
 journey into New England, and go to Boston; which 
 was in many respects, of very great and happy con 
 sequence to the interest of religion, and especially 
 among his own people. By this means, as has been 
 observed he was brought into acquaintance with 
 many persons of note and influence, ministers and 
 others, belonging both to town and various parts of 
 the country; and had opportunity, under the best ad 
 vantages, to bear a testimony for God and truo 
 religion, and against those false appearances of it 
 that have proved most pernicious to the interests of 
 Christ s kingdom in the land. And the providence 
 of God is particularly observable in this circum 
 stance of the testimony he there bore for true relig 
 ion, viz. that he was there brought so near the 
 grave, and continued, for so long a time on the very 
 brink of eternity; and from time to time lookod on 
 himself, and was looked on by others, as just leaving 
 the world; and that in these circumstances he should 
 he so particularly directed and assisted in his 
 thoughts and views of religion, to distinguish 
 between the true and false, with such clearness and 
 evidence; and that after this he should be unexpect 
 edly and surprisingly restored and strengthened, so 
 far as to be able to converse freelv; and have such 
 
276 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 opportunity and special occasions to declare the sen 
 timents he had in these, which were, to human appre 
 hension, his dying circumstances; and to hear his 
 testimony concerning the nature of true religion, 
 and concerning the mischievous tendency of its most 
 prevalent counterfeits and false appearances; as 
 things he had a special and distinct view of at that 
 time, when he expected in a few days to he in eter 
 nity; and the certainty and importance of which 
 were then, in a peculiar manner impressed on his 
 mind. 
 
 Among the happy consequences of his going to 
 Boston, were those liberal benefactions that have 
 been mentioned, which were made by piously dis 
 posed persons, for the maintaining and promoting 
 the interest of religion among his people; and also 
 the meeting of a number of gentlemen in Boston, of 
 note and ability, to consult upon measures for that 
 purpose; who were excited by their acquaintance 
 and conversation with Mr. Brainerd, and by the ac 
 count of the great things God had wrought by his 
 ministry, to unite themselves, that by their joint en 
 deavors and contributions they might promote the 
 kingdom of Christ, and the spiritual good of their 
 fellow-creatures, among the Indians in New Jersey, 
 and elsewhere. 
 
 It was also remarkable, that Mr. Brainerd should 
 go to Boston at that time, after the honorable crm- 
 missioners there, of the corporation in London, for 
 propagating the Gospel in ISew England and parts 
 adjacent, had received Dr. Williams s legacy for the 
 maintaining of two missionaries among the Heathen; 
 and at a time when they having concluded on a mis 
 sion to the Indians of the Six Nations (so called,) 
 were looking out for fit persons to be employed iu 
 that important service. This proved an occasion of 
 their committing to him the affair of finding and 
 recommending suitable persons: which has proved a 
 successful means of two persons being found and ac 
 tually appointed to that business; who seem to be 
 
 
REFLECTIONS, i2< 7 
 
 well qualified for it, and to have their hearts greatly 
 engaged in it; one of which has been solemnly or 
 dained to that work in Boston, and is now gone 
 forth to one of those tribes, who have appeared well 
 disposed to his reception: it being judged not con 
 venient for the other to go till the next spring by 
 reason of his bodily infirmity. 
 
 These happy consequences of Mr. Brainerd s 
 journey to Boston would have been prevented, in 
 case he had died, when he was brought so near to 
 death in New Jersey. Or if after he came first to 
 Northampton (where he was much at a loss and long 
 deliberating which Way to bend his course,) he had 
 determined not to go to Boston. 
 
 The providence of God was observable in his go 
 ing to Boston at a time when not only the honorable 
 commissioners were seeking missionaries to the Six 
 Nations, hut just after his journal, which gives an 
 account of his labors arid success among the Indians, 
 had been received and spread in Boston; whereby 
 his name was known, and the minds of serious peo 
 ple were well prepared to receive his person, and the 
 testimony he there gave for God; to exert themselves 
 for the upholding and promoting the interest of re 
 ligion in his congregation, and amongst the Indians 
 elsewhere; and to regard his judgment concerning 
 the qualifications of missionaries, ice. If he bad 
 gone there the fall before (when he had intended 
 to have made his journey into New England, but 
 was prevented by a sudden great increase of his 
 illness,) it would not have been likely to have 
 been in any measure to so good effect: and also if 
 lie had not been unexpectedly detained in Boston; 
 for when he went from my house, he intended to 
 make but a very short stay there; but divine Provi 
 dence by his being brought so low there, detained 
 him long; thereby to make way for the fulfilling its 
 own gracious designs. 
 
 The providence of God was remarkable in so or 
 dering, that although he was brought so very near 
 24* 
 
S78 REFLECTIONS. 
 
 the grave in Boston, that it was not iuthe least ex 
 peeled he would ever come alive out of his chamber; 
 yet he wonderfully revived, and was preserved sev 
 eral months longer; so that he had opportunity to 
 see, and fully to converse with both his younger 
 brethren before he died; which was a thing he greatly 
 desired; and especially to see his brother John, with 
 whom was left the care of his congregation, that he 
 might by him be fully informed of their state, and 
 might leave with him such instructions and direc 
 tions as were requisite in order to their spiritual 
 welfare, and to send to them his dying charges and 
 counsels. And he had also opportunity, by means 
 of this suspension of his death, to find and recom 
 mend a couple of persons fit to be employed as mis 
 sionaries to the Six Nations, as had been desired of 
 him. 
 
 Thus although it was the pleasure of a sovereign 
 God, that he should be taken away from his congre 
 gation, the people that he had begotten through the 
 Gospel, who were so dear to him; yet it was granteti 
 to him, that before he died he should see them well 
 provided for every way: he saw them provided for 
 with one to instruct them, and take care of their 
 souls his own brother whom he could confide in: he 
 saw a good foundation laid for the support of the 
 school among them; those things that before were 
 wanting in order to it, being supplied; and he had 
 the prospect of a charitable society being established, 
 of able and well-disposed persons, who seemed to 
 make the spiritual interest of his congregation their 
 own; whereby he had a comfortable view of their 
 being well provided for, for the future: and he had 
 also opportunity to leave all his dying charges with 
 his successor in the pastoral care of his people, and 
 by him to send his dying counsels to them. Thus 
 God granted him to see all things happily settled, or 
 in a hopeful way of being so, before his death, with 
 respect to his dear people. And whereas not only 
 his own congregation, but the souls of the Indians in 
 
REFLECTIONS. 279 
 
 .North America in general, were very dear to him, 
 and he had greatly set his heart on the propagating 
 and extending the kingdom of Christ among them; 
 God was pleased to grant to him, (however it was 
 his will, that he should he taken away, and so should 
 not he the immediate instrument of their instruction 
 and conversion, yet,) that before his death, he should 
 see unexpected extraordinary provision made for 
 this also. And it is remarkable that God not only 
 allowed him to see such provision made for the main 
 taining the interest of religion among his own peo 
 ple, and the propagation of it elsewhere; but honored 
 him by making him the means or occasion of it. So 
 that it is very probable, however Mr. Brainerd dur 
 ing the last four months of his life, was ordinarily in 
 an extremely weak and low state, very often scarcely 
 able to speak; yet that he was made the instrument 
 or means of much more good in that space of time, 
 than he would have been if he had been well, and in 
 full strength of body. Thus God s power was man 
 ifested in his weakness, and the life of Christ was 
 manifested in his mortal fiesh. 
 
 Another thing, wherein appears the merciful dis 
 posal of Providence with respect to his death, was, 
 that he did not die in the wilderness, among the sav 
 ages at Kaunaumeck, or the Forks of Delaware: or 
 at Susquahannah; but in a place where his dying 
 behavior and speeches might he observed and re 
 membered, arid some account given of them for the 
 benefit of survivors; and also where care might be 
 taken of him in his sickness, and proper honors done 
 him at his death. 
 
 If these circumstances of Mr. Brainerd s death 
 be duly considered, 1 doubt not but they will be ac 
 knowledged as a notable instance of God s fatherly 
 care, and covenant faithfulness towards them that 
 are devoted to him, and faithfully serve him while 
 they live; whereby "He never fails nor forsakes 
 them, but is with them living and dying; so that 
 whether they live, they live to the Lord: or whether 
 
280 KEFLECTIONS. 
 
 they die, they die to the Lord;" and both in the life 
 and death they are owned and taken care of as his. 
 Mr. firainerd himself, as was before observed, was 
 much in taking notice (when near his end) of the 
 merciful circumstances of his death; and said, from 
 time to time, that "God had granted him all his 
 desire." 
 
 THE END. 
 
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