B 3 3M2 E1S 
 
 
Fhe Little Gray Lady 
 
 :HANNING POLLOCK 
 
 \MUEL FRENCH, 28-30 West 38th St., New York 
 
Price, 6O Cent s 
 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 A PLAY WITHOUT A HERO 
 
 BY 
 
 CHANNING POLLOCK 
 
 COPYRIGHT, 1905, BY CHANGING POLLOCK 
 COPYBIGHT, 1918, BY SAMUEL FRENCH 
 
 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED 
 
 NEW YORK 
 SAMUEL FRENCH 
 
 PUBLISHES 
 
 28-30 WEST 38TH STREET 
 
 LONDON 
 
 SAMUEL FRENCH, LTD. 
 
 26 SOUTHAMPTON STREET 
 
 STRAND 
 
Especial notice should be taken that the possession 
 ef this book without a valid contract for production 
 first having been obtained from the publisher, confers 
 no right or license to professionals or amateurs to 
 produce the play publicly or in private for gain or 
 charity. 
 
 L. 
 
 In its present form this play is dedicated to the 
 reading public only, and no performance of it may be 
 given, except by special arrangement with Samuel 
 French. 
 
 SECTION 28. That any person who wilfully or for 
 profit shall infringe any copyright secured by this act, 
 or who shall knowing^ and wilfully aid or abet such 
 infringement, shall be deemed guilty of a misdemeanor, 
 and upon conviction thereof shall be punished by im 
 prisonment for not exceeding one year, or by a rine of 
 not less than one hundred dollars nor more than one 
 thousand dollars, or both, in the discretion of the court. 
 Act of March 4, 1909. 
 
PREFACE 
 
 To one person, at least, the perusal of the follow 
 ing pages has been a pleasant excursion along The 
 Road to Yesterday. 
 
 " The Little Gray Lady " was my first original 
 play. (That is, it was my first original play, if you 
 will be kind enough to except a crude melodrama 
 produced in my adolescence and Proctor s Fifty- 
 eighth Street "Theater.) It was begun in my 
 twenty-second year, and with nothing in my mind 
 but the conviction that I should write a play. My 
 regular occupation was securing publicity for 
 William A. Brady, who had just presented Wilton 
 Lackaye in my dramatization of Frank Norris 
 novel, " The Pit." That fortunate debut, I argued, 
 would avail me nothing, unless it was followed, 
 reasonably soon, by another opus. 
 
 So, with my mind made up, and a promising 
 period of summer idleness ahead, I sat me down 
 to write a play. I hadn t the faintest idea what 
 the play was to be about, or where located. In 
 fact, as aforesaid, I hadn t anything but a con 
 viction, and a title "The Little Gray Lady." My 
 only method of breaking down a wall is to beat 
 my head against it. For more than a month I sat 
 behind a locked door, in my apartment on Seventh 
 Avenue, from nine in the morning until six at night, 
 and tried to think out a story. The books and 
 papers about me proved a temptation, so they were 
 taken out, and, on the theory that forbade decora 
 tions in the Wagnerian theater at Bayreuth, the 
 room was stripped of all furniture but a chair, a 
 table, and a typewriter. At the end of five or six 
 weeks, I had nerves, but no narrative. 
 
 357 
 
4 PREFACE 
 
 An old friend, a physician, told me the important 
 truth that the best way to find an idea is not to 
 look for it. Dejected and discouraged, I deserted 
 the bare work-shop, took a train to Baltimore, dis 
 embarked there, and started to walk to Washing 
 ton. On the way came something of a theme. 
 The cause of its coming was rather personal, but 
 perhaps you will forgive that phase of the history. 
 I was engaged to be married to a lady who con 
 sidered herself plain. She wasn t, and isn t, as any 
 one who knows my wife will tell you, but that is 
 too personal, and much beside the point. The point 
 is that she thought herself plain, and that I was 
 forever telling her what Mrs. Graham tells Mrs. 
 Jordan that " a girl can push a man down hill 
 pretty fast, but it takes a woman to help him up." 
 
 Here, then, was a thesis with the advantage of 
 fitting a title I was resolved not to give up. The 
 rest came in Washington, where I was born, had 
 gone to school, had written dramatic criticism for 
 The Post and The Times, and, most helpful of all, 
 had lived in boarding houses and had friends who 
 clerked for the Government. It would be like call 
 ing attention to Mont Blanc to note the wisdom of 
 writing only of the things you know well. O. 
 Henry s prime genius lay in confining himself to 
 the romance of " Bagdad on the Subway," where 
 he was familiar with every twist and turn of street 
 and human nature, rather than seeking it in Asiatic 
 Turkey. Washington s boarding houses, and what 
 they had produced, and indicated, in their inhab 
 itants was a forgotten mental reservoir into which 
 water had flowed during the most impressionable 
 period of my life. Once the dam was down, came 
 the deluge. 
 
 Within twenty- four hours, I had my play a 
 rushing river, to keep the metaphor, into which 
 flowed the futile dreaming of Captain Jordan, the 
 
PREFACE 5 
 
 prying energy of Mrs. Jordan, the vulgar self- 
 seeking of Ruth Jordan, the eddying of Perry 
 Carlyle, caught in a back-water, and the infinite 
 maternity of Anna Gray. I knew all these people- 
 dozens of them hundreds. Each was a type; one 
 of a group that had sat about me summer evenings 
 on the front steps, and gone " car-riding " _ for 
 economical diversion. They themselves provided 
 the story. It remained only for me to refresh 
 memory photographs, confirm detail, and question 
 friends in the Secret Service as to the possibility 
 of occurences connected with the manufactured bill. 
 The bill itself was made small purposely. :i The 
 Little Gray Lady " was to be a comedy of smaU 
 people, of their small joys and sorrows and hopes 
 and fears and doings. 
 
 Back in my bare room, the piece was finished 
 within a fortnight. I had not then acquired the 
 knowledge of good work that leads to constant and 
 destructive comparison, nor developed the faculty 
 of criticism that tears down more than it can build. 
 I was not forever asking myself if this speech could 
 be bettered, or that situation advantageously re 
 modeled. I wrote because I did not know how to 
 write ; as the centipede, in the verse, ran until some 
 one asked how he managed his legs. But, alas, 
 neither did I know how to sell, and here was mer 
 chandise that required considerable persuasive 
 ability. Anybody can dispose of a play like every 
 other play. The fact that it is like something that 
 made a hit assures the average manager that it, too, 
 will make a hit. But the man who produces any 
 thing different for the American Theater, anything 
 fresh and original and without precedent, goes into 
 the market-place accompanied by the Shadow of 
 Bankruptcy. 
 
 So far as any actress had been in my mind. 
 " The Little Gray Lady " was written for Phoebe 
 
6 PREFACE 
 
 Davies, then in her third or fourth season of 
 " Way Down East." Miss Davies wanted a new 
 vehicle, but her husband and manager, Joseph 
 Grismer. associated with my employer, Mr. Brady, 
 was sure of " Way Down East." Charles Froh- 
 man, to whom the piece was offered for Annie 
 Russell, declined it, only to tell me later, when he 
 had seen the play and sent for me, that he had never 
 received the manuscript, and would have considered 
 it ideal for Miss Russell. A list of producers who 
 declined " The Little Gray Lady " would fill my 
 allotted space, as a list of their reasons would 
 embrace every outstanding feature that afterward 
 figured in its success. Elisabeth Marbury, my agent, 
 finally grew weary as, indeed, after three years, 
 she had reason to be and suggested that we retire 
 my unlucky heroine to some nice, comfortable desk 
 drawer. 
 
 Throughout, her imitation had the unflagging and 
 unflinching faith of the original Little Gray Lady. 
 I mention this impersonally as may be, and in the 
 same spirit that impells me to mention a new 
 champion, my second agent, Alice Kauser. Miss 
 Kauser believed in the play, kept her belief, inspired 
 with her enthusiasm, and, I think, invested some of 
 the necessary capital, when, in 1905, four years 
 after it was written, she finally found a producer in 
 Maurice Campbell. And this intrepid adventurer, 
 though limited as to means and influence, and with 
 out a theater, brought to the piece skilful and im 
 aginative direction that added immeasurably to 
 whatever value it may have possessed. 
 
 ; The Little Gray Lady " was acted on the road 
 in the Autumn of 1905, and came to the Garrick 
 Theater, in New York, January 25th, 1906. It was, 
 perhaps, the first play of its genre of everyday 
 happenings to commonplace people, who were not 
 the rustics of James A. Herne, nor the crowded 
 
PREFACE 7 
 
 metropolitans of Edward Harrigan, but more c!ose 1 y 
 paralleled later in Rachel Crothers charming " The 
 Three of Us." The newspaper verdict on the per 
 formance was practically unanimous. The things I 
 had liked, and feared the grayness and everyday- 
 ness of story and characters ; the unimportance, ex 
 cept to them, of what came near being their tragedy 
 were taken as they had been intended, and 
 criticism universally was of the sort authors and 
 actors believe in which is to say, favorable. That 
 the piece made a somewhat deeper impression than 
 do many offerings of its sort has been gratifyingly 
 indicated this year, when I have seen two pleasant 
 mentions of it in books of comment, one of them 
 Walter Prichard Eaton s " The American Stage To 
 day." It gave me what came to be the close friend 
 ship of a great and generous man, Clyde Fitch, who, 
 after its first performance, \vrote to the apprentice 
 in his shop, " Your Little Gray Lady is a very 
 big little lady, I think." 
 
 Anna Gray and her associates did not make much 
 money in New York. For one reason, Mr. Camp 
 bell, as aforesaid, did not have a theater, and, be 
 cause the owner of the house wanted to bring in a 
 production of his own, we were obliged to leave the 
 Garrick at the end of our biggest week. The 
 Majestic, to which we moved, was pretty large, and 
 pretty far up-town. Another reason I see now in 
 reading the comedy after sixteen years. " A Play 
 Without a Hero " may be an interesting experiment, 
 but it is not likely to be popular. Perriton Carlyle 
 was made what he is because his type is common 
 in Washington, and exemplifies conditions in de 
 partmental life in Washington. Moreover, because 
 that was the kind of man to call forth what was 
 best in Anna Gray, and, finally, because, at twenty- 
 two, I had more tolerance and sympathy for weak 
 lings than now. Edgar Selwyn, since become a 
 
8 PREFACE 
 
 playwright himself, originally acted Perry, and told 
 me then that making a hero of the man who was to 
 marry my heroine would double the success of the 
 play. I know now that he was right. I know, top, 
 that the general view of behavior such as Perry s 
 is the correct view that this behavior is symp 
 tomatic, and more likely to indicate true nature 
 than do the bits of square conduct, at the end, 
 which, in those days, I advanced in proof of redemp 
 tion. 
 
 In spite of Carlyle, however, there has been long 
 life in " The Little Gray Lady." The Western com 
 pany, headed by Pauline Frederick, did very well, 
 and, after twelve years, the piece continues so great a 
 favorite " in stock " that hardly a week elapses that 
 it is not done somewhere. Personally, and quite 
 frankly, I am still in love with " The Little Gray 
 Lady ", because of the lady who brought her into 
 being, and because, as a playwright, she brought 
 me into being. I have gained literary skill and 
 dramatic craftsmanship since her birth, but I should 
 be happy to believe that I had lost none of the warm 
 human touch, of the reporter ial faculty, that shows 
 in these pages. To me Anna Gray has been what 
 she proved to Perry" The Little Gold Lady." 
 
 CHANNING POLLOCK. 
 The Parsonage, 
 Shoreham, L. I., 
 April 3oth, 1918. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 THE ORIGINAL CASTS. 
 
 (Eastern Company Garrick and Majestic The 
 aters, New York, beginning January 2$th, 1906.) 
 
 PERRITON CARLYLE John W. Albaugh, Jr. 
 
 SAMUEL MEADE William Humphrey 
 
 CAPTAIN HENRY JORDAN Charles A. Gay 
 
 RICHARD GRAHAM Robert Ober 
 
 MR. UPTON Cyril Vesina 
 
 BOB, an urchin Harry Wagner 
 
 ANNA GRAY Julia Dean 
 
 RUTH JORDAN Dorothy Donnelly 
 
 MRS. JORDAN Eva Vincent 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM, nee Garruth Justina Wayne 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH Rachel Burr 
 
 (Western Company Studebaker Theater, Chicago, 
 beginning March 12th, 1906.) 
 
 PERRITON CARLYLE Stephen Gratten 
 
 SAMUEL MEADE Edward Eisner 
 
 CAPTAIN HENRY JORDAN Frank Opperman 
 
 RICHARD GRAHAM Charles D. Pitt 
 
 MR. UPTON A. Latschka 
 
 BOB, an urchin Harold De Becker 
 
 ANNA GRAY Pauline Frederick 
 
 RUTH JORDAN Ola Humphry 
 
 MRS. JORDAN Eleanor Sheldon 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM, nee Carruth Mary Moran 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH ..Helen Leslie 
 
" Frequent tears have run 
 
 The colors from my life, and left so dead 
 And gray a stuff, it were not fitly done 
 To give the same as pillow to thy head." 
 
 MRS. BROWNING. 
 
 " A man made weak by loving and then strong by 
 being loved." 
 
 ARTHUR SYMONS. 
 
 10 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 THE PERSONS 
 
 PERRITON CARLYLE 
 SAMUEL MEADE 
 CAPTAIN HENRY JORDAN 
 RICHARD GRAHAM 
 MR. UPTON 
 
 BOB An urchin 
 
 ANNA GRAY 
 RUTH JORDAN 
 MRS. JORDAN 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM Nee Carruth 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH 
 
 Certain officials at the Treasury Department. 
 THE PLACES 
 
 ACT I. The " back yard " at Mrs. Jordan s. 
 
 ACT II. Miss Gray s room " the second story 
 
 front " at Mrs. Jordan s. 
 ACT III. Part of the Redemption Agency at the 
 
 Treasury Department. 
 ACT IV. The " back yard " again. 
 
 The action of the entire play occurs at Wash 
 ington, D. C., on an afternoon in June, and on the 
 night, the afternoon and the morning of three suc 
 cessive days in October. 
 
 ii 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 ACT I 
 
 SCENE : The " back yard " at MRS. JORDAN S. Drop 
 shows the rear of the house, a red brick 
 structure to which has been appended a wooden 
 porch. This porch is reached by tivo steps. 
 Platforms behind the drop enable people 
 to stand back of the second story windows of 
 the dwelling. The curtains at these windows 
 are drawn down. Sundry articles visiblt 
 through the lower windows identify the room 
 as a kitchen. Pans of various kinds are sus 
 pended from the posts of the porch, while tubs, 
 empty bottles and a clothes horse litter up the 
 corners. A fence, five feet high and newly 
 white-washed, built of boards nailed vertically, 
 runs from the drop to L. I E., while another 
 performs a similar feat between the drop and 
 R. I E. These fences separate this " back yard " 
 from those of the neighbors, which are indicated 
 by adjoining houses on the cloth and by various 
 details. At L. c. in the drop is the entrance to 
 a narrow alley, leading to the street. There 
 is one tree in the enclosure, between which and 
 the fence R. is hung a new hammock. At c. a 
 bench. The yard is fairly clean, being used 
 generally as a lounging place. It is 6 : 30 
 o clock, an evening in June, and, as the act 
 13 
 
i 4 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 progresses, the bronze of sunset dissolves first 
 into the- gold of twilight and finally into the 
 silver of moonlit night. 
 
 DISCOVERED: A pair of hands is seen above the 
 fence at R. removing clothes from a line. CAP 
 TAIN JORDAN, a ruddy-cheeked, white-mus 
 tache d man between fifty- five and sixty, is dis 
 covered, fitting on the edge of the porch, 
 engaged in freezing ice cream. BOB, a bare 
 footed, not-overly-clean urchin of fourteen, is 
 perched on the fence L. MRS. JORDAN S lodgers 
 are at table in the dining-room beyond the 
 kitchen, and, whenever the door between these 
 two places is opened, the clatter of knives and 
 forks and the noise of conversation are heard. 
 Curtain rises during silence after orchestra 
 has played curtain music. A woman in the 
 neighboring house is then heard practicing the 
 vocal scale. 
 
 BOB. Is it most froze? 
 
 JORDAN. If it ain t, somebody else has got to 
 tackle it. I don t see why I should do all the work 
 in the house. 
 
 BOB. What ll you give me to turn 
 
 JORDAN. Ssh. Here s Mrs. Jordan. 
 
 (Enter MRS. JORDAN from house. She is a tall, 
 spare woman of forty- five. Upon her ap 
 pearance the vocal scale is stopped. She re 
 mains on the porch.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Taking a comprehensive view of 
 the situation) They ve got to their salad, Henry. 
 You d better hurry. (She exits) 
 
 JORDAN. How can I hurry the stuff? I m not a 
 steam engine. 
 
 BOB. Give me a plate if I turn the crank a while ? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 15 
 
 JORDAN. (Testily) No! (Mutters) Work! 
 Work! Work! Nothing but work from morning 
 til night ! 
 
 BOB. Aw, stingy! (Pulls a much-mussed 
 envelope, brilliant red in color, from his hat. A 
 battered boiler-cover is thrown over the fence R. 
 into the "yard") Look what the drug-store feller 
 give me. 
 
 JORDAN. (Glancing indifferently at the boiler 
 cover) What? (Looks at BOB) That red 
 envelope ? 
 
 BOB. Yep. 
 
 JORDAN. What s it good for? 
 
 BOB. Oh, I don t know ! I ll write a letter some 
 day maybe. 
 
 JORDAN. (Takes the top off the freezer and ex 
 amines the contents. Disgustedly replaces it) Come 
 on, Bob. (Abandons freezer) I ll see that you get 
 a dish of ice cream. 
 
 BOB. (Returns the envelope to his hat and jumps 
 down with alacrity) Cross your heart? 
 
 JORDAN. Cross my heart. (BOB goes to freezer 
 and turns the crank wildly. JORDAN sits in hammock, 
 mops his face, and takes from pocket a cigar which 
 he licks lovingly) By jingo, it s hot! (Lights 
 cigar) Keep that up and it won t be long. 
 
 BOB. I can t keep it up long. 
 
 JORDAN. What! A big, strong boy like you! 
 (The door within is opened and closed. JORDAN 
 starts up, but is at ease again upon seeing who is 
 coming. Enter MRS. GRAHAM, a pretty woman of 
 twenty-five, neatly dressed) Oh, I thought you 
 were my wife ! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Coming down steps) You 
 didn t look overly well pleased. 
 
 JORDAN. Huh. You didn t wait for dessert. 
 Wasn t Mr. Carlyle attentive enough? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Annoyed) Captain! (To 
 
1 6 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 BOB) You may have my share all the ice cream 
 you want. 
 
 BOB. There ain t that much. 
 
 JORDAN. This house is getting to be a regular 
 matrimonial agency. Virginia s bound she ll make 
 a match between Ruth and Mr. Graham. They d be 
 a nice couple, don t you think, Miss Carruth? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Blunting the edge of her re 
 mark with a laugh) I don t think about what 
 doesn t concern me. If you didn t you might have 
 more time for what does. 
 
 JORDAN. Meaning work, huh? (Gets out of 
 hammock and stretches himself) Wait til I get 
 enough capital to open up the Black Diamond 
 (Noise from house again. He hastily pretends to 
 examine the freezer. Enter MRS. JORDAN with a 
 tray of empty dishes. She comes down from 
 porch) Why, it s done! 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. It ought to be! (She puts down 
 the tray and throws the boiler cover over fence R. 
 Addresses MRS. GRAHAM, who is sitting in the 
 hammock) I wish you hadn t left the table, Miss 
 Carruth. It s awful the way Mr. Carlyle forces his 
 attentions on Ruth. (Fills the dishes with ice 
 cream ) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. I don t see what I have to do 
 with it. Mr. Carlyle is Miss Gray s guest. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. He don t consider himself so. 
 He s come here so much he feels like one of the 
 family. And the way he talks to Ruth! (Goes up 
 steps) The poor child is dreadful embarrassed. 
 (To BOB) Bob Ebbets, take your fingers out of 
 that ice cream,! (Exits) 
 
 BOB. (Calling after her) I m going to have a 
 plate. (Rises, with -freezer lid full of ice cream) 
 Guess Fd better have it some place else! (Exits 
 over fence L.) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Starts as the boiler cover, sail- 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 17 
 
 ing over the fence R., falls to the stage with a crash) 
 He s a great boy. (Seats herself on the step) 
 
 JORDAN. Carlyle thinks so. He s always buying 
 things for him. I don t know how he affords it. 
 He s got his mother somewhere out in Ohio, and 
 his salary can t be over twelve hundred. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. He s in the Treasury, isn t he? 
 
 JORDAN. Yes. He and Miss Gray are in the 
 same room with Ruth. 
 
 (Enter MRS. JORDAN with tray unobserved. Stands 
 on porch behind MRS. GRAHAM.) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. It s an idle, aimless life, and I 
 think it s having a bad effect on Mr. Carlyle. Miss 
 Gray frets a good deal about him. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Miss Gray! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Yes. (Shifting her position on 
 step) Can you pass? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Thanks. (Conies down, puts tra\ 
 on porch, and throws boiler cover back over fence 
 R.) 
 
 JORDAN. Why, I thought Miss Gray was stuck on 
 that fellow, Meade. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (With deep disgust) You men! 
 Mr. Carlyle ought to marry Anna Gray for his 
 own sake as well as for hers. He needs a girl like 
 her to keep him straight. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Girl ! Well, if she s a girl, Henry 
 is! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. That s just it. A girl can push 
 a man down hill pretty fast, but it takes a woman 
 to help him up. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I don t want Ruth helpin any man 
 up hill. If you want to save him why don t you 
 marry him yourself? (Picking up tray and ap 
 parently finding it heavy) Here, Henry ; carry this. 
 
 JORDAN. (Takes tray, mutters) More work. 
 
i8 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Contemptuously) When you 
 get your Self-Threading Needle patented or your 
 Black Diamond Mines opened, or 
 
 (Enter RICHARD GRAHAM, a clean, alert young man 
 of thirty-two, dressed in flannels. He stands 
 hesitantly on the porch.) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Rises. Addresses GRAHAM) 
 Come on out. You re just in time to prevent my 
 being married to Mr. Carlyle. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Comes down steps) Who s going to 
 marry you to Carlyle? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Miss Carruth said she thought 
 somebody ought to reform him. 
 
 GRAHAM. Rubbish! Carlyle s all right! 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I ve said it once and I say it again ! 
 I ain t a-goin to have him marryin Ruth, if I know 
 it. (Enter CARLYLE. He is a good-looking fellow, 
 twenty-six years of age, conventionally dressed, and 
 carrying a napkin as an indication that he has not 
 finished dinner. MRS. JORDAN, fearful that he may 
 have overheard, looks at him swiftly and covers her 
 confusion by scolding her husband) Henry, come 
 along ! Nobody wants ice cream for breakfast ! 
 (Exit MRS. JORDAN in house. JORDAN picks up tray 
 and follows her. Boiler cover thrown on stage 
 again) 
 
 CARLYLE. I m sent after you, Miss Carruth. 
 You re wanted to settle a bet about the pension 
 office. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Goes up steps as CARLYLE comes 
 down) What a nuisance. (To GRAHAM) Don t 
 go away. I ll be back in a moment. (Exit in 
 house. CARLYLE starts to follow her) 
 
 GRAHAM. Carlyle. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Stops and turns around) Yes? 
 
 GRAHAM. Got a second? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 19 
 
 CARLYLE. Surely. (Comes down) What s up? 
 
 GRAHAM. We re pretty good friends, Carlyle. 
 Do you like me well enough to let me mix in your 
 personal affairs? 
 
 CARLYLE. Drive on. 
 
 GRAHAM. When you turned up a minute ago, 
 Mrs. Jordan was expressing the fear that you might 
 marry Ruth. (CARLYLE starts with surprise) 
 Now I it s none of my business but I 
 
 CARLYLE. I m not going to marry Ruth, if that s 
 what you re after. I ve never thought of such a 
 thing. 
 
 GRAHAM. Excuse me for mentioning it. I acted 
 on impulse, and you have been chumming with the 
 girl a good deal lately. 
 
 CARLYLE. Chumming s the word. I like Miss 
 Jordan. I think she s a mighty nice little woman. 
 
 GRAHAM. So do I. But all nice little women 
 aren t helpful wives. 
 
 CARLYLE. I know what you mean and who you 
 mean. Anna Gray comes first with me if if 
 
 (Enter MRS. GRAHAM.) 
 
 GRAHAM. If what? 
 
 CARLYLE. If she wants to. If she doesn t prefer 
 Sam Meade. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Coming down) So you ve been 
 hearing that nonsense. (Crosses to R.) Well, if 
 this isn t the gossipiest old town. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Musingly) It is that! (Waking 
 from his reverie) By George! My ice cream will 
 be melting! See you later! (Runs up steps) 
 
 GRAHAM. You re not angry with me, old man? 
 
 CARLYLE. Angry? With you? Don t talk 
 foolishness. (Exits) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Indicathw CARLYLE) He s a 
 nice fellow. Only I wish Mrs. Jordan wouldn t 
 keep thrusting him at me. 
 
20 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 GRAHAM. That woman is the most confirmed 
 matchmaker I have ever met. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Horrid old thing! She just 
 wants me to fall in love with Mr. Carlyle so that 
 you can marry that silly daughter of hers. 
 
 GRAHAM. Ruth s a very clever girl. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. She s pretty enough to make you 
 think so. (Starts angrily R. c.) Good heavens, you 
 men are so stupid. The foolishest doll face in the 
 world can twist you around her little finger. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Following) Why, you dear old 
 goose! (Catches her and embraces her} You 
 know I don t care a hang for anyone in the world 
 but you. (A light is turned up behind a "second- 
 story window) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Looking over GRAHAM S arms 
 at the illumination) I suppose she s up there 
 now at her dresser sharpening her claws like a 
 cat! 
 
 GRAHAM. Now, you mustn t be spiteful ! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. I don t care, Dick ! I don t see 
 the use of being married if we re the only people 
 who know it. 
 
 GRAHAM. You can t keep your position, Kiddie, 
 if you can t keep our secret. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Such nonsense that a woman 
 can t work in the departments after she gets a hus 
 band. If you want to know w r hat I think, I think 
 it s downright selfish of the government! 
 
 GRAHAM. Never mind, old girl ! As soon as 
 we ve saved a thousand dollars more we ll pull up 
 stakes, settle in Venezuela, and grow coffee. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. On our own plantation just you 
 and I? 
 
 GRAHAM. (Taking her hand) Just you and I 
 and the coffee. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. You darling! (Both hugging) 
 
 GRAHAM. Do you love me? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 21 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. With all my heart. 
 
 GRAHAM. My kiddie! (They are about to kiss. 
 At this critical moment, enter BOB, scrambling to the 
 top of the fence) 
 
 BOB. Hi! Break away! 
 
 GRAHAM. (Both jump out of hammock. He 
 crosses to R., indignantly) Confound that boy! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Bobbie, you re so so unsym 
 pathetic. Were you never in love ? 
 
 BOB. Me ? Nit ! Dames is too much trouble ! 
 
 (Enter JORDAN from house, fingering a coin and 
 muttering.) 
 
 JORDAN. Doggone Carlyle ! Why did he have 
 to ask for cake? (Going toward passage up L.) 
 
 GRAHAM. (Crossing to MRS. GRAHAM to L., 
 addressing JORDAN) What s wrong? More work? 
 
 JORDAN. (Stops) Yes. Got to go round the 
 corner for cake. Won t you come, too, Miss Car- 
 ruth? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Weil, I hardly think so. (Enter 
 MRS. JORDAN and RUTH JORDAN, a typically fluffy, 
 alluring, consciously-attractive, golden-haired young 
 woman of twenty-four. She pauses in the "door 
 way and lifts her arm in order that her mother 
 may place a needed pin in her dress under it. 
 GRAHAM turns toward them, and, as she observes 
 this, MRS. GRAHAM S manner changes. Going tow 
 ard fence L.) Bob! (Bos fearful that he mav be 
 asked to go to the shop, starts to tower himself on 
 the oilier side of the fence) 
 
 BOB. Yes in ! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Got a pencil? 
 
 BOB. Yes m. (Removes his hat and obtains one 
 from the band handing it to her. While the group 
 by the porch is conversing, she takes a piece of paper 
 from the Jiat and writes on it) 
 
22 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 GRAHAM. Through dinner, Miss Jordan? 
 
 RUTH. (Her manner distinctly suggesting 
 coquetry) Oh, Mr. Graham! I didn t see you! 
 (Coming down toward hammock) 
 
 GRAHAM. I don t know how people can linger 
 over dinner in hot weather. It s so delightful out 
 here. 
 
 RUTH. It promises to be now. (Sits in ham 
 mock) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Here, Bobbie. (Hands him 
 note) Give that to Mr. Graham. I m ready, Cap 
 tain. 
 
 (Exeunt JORDAN and MRS. GRAHAM. BOB reads 
 the note, takes the red envelope from his pocket, 
 triumphantly seals the letter in it.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Throws boiler cover over fence 
 R.) When I was a girl we used to eat dinner in 
 summer on the lawn in front of the family mansion. 
 (Fanning herself on house steps. BOB crosses be 
 hind her quietly and comes down R. of GRAHAM) 
 
 RUTH. Mr. Carlyle and I dined at Cabin John s 
 Bridge last Sunday. Mr. Carlyle insisted on our 
 having champagne. Wasn t it foolish of him? 
 
 GRAHAM. (Dryly) Considering his responsi 
 bilities extremely. 
 
 BOB. (Goes to R. of GRAHAM, carrying the red 
 envelope conspicuously and addresses him in a stage 
 whisper) Psch ! Mr. Graham ! 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Ruth is so extravagant. It s the 
 blood of the Peytons. My grandfather (Stops 
 speaking eyeing BOB) 
 
 BOB. Psch! Mr. Graham! (Tugs at GRAHAM S 
 coat) 
 
 (GRAHAM looks at him. He gesticulates frantically 
 
 with his thumb.) 
 GRAHAM. (To RUTH) Excuse me. I infer that 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 23 
 
 this gentleman wants to speak with me. (Rises 
 and joins BOB) 
 
 RUTH. Certainly. 
 
 BOB. (Giving him red envelope} From Miss 
 Carruth. (Winks gravely} Tumble? 
 
 GRAHAM. (Winking ivith equal gravity} You 
 bet! (Takes note from envelope, glances at it, 
 kisses it, shoves it back into envelope and the 
 envelope into his pocket} I m the greatest little 
 tumbler you ever saw (Exit hastily L. BOB starts 
 to go to fence L.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Severely) Bobbie! (BOB stops) 
 Where did you get that envelope? 
 
 BOB. From the drug-store. (Running to and 
 swinging up on the fence. Impudently) They 
 don t keep em at the butcher s any more. (Laughs, 
 and swinging over the fence, exits) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. The brat!! (RUTH laughs) You 
 needn t laugh. If you hadn t disgusted Mr. Graham 
 with your talk of champagne he wouldn t have gone. 
 (Rises) 
 
 RUTH. (Rises, crosses to L.) Don t be silly. 
 The note was from a woman. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. All the more reason why you 
 should have kept him. If you re not careful that 
 Carruth girl will get him right under your nose. 
 
 RUTH. She s welcome to him. (L. c.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Welcome to him! And him just 
 left about half of South America! (Rises. Her 
 indignation can go no farther. She grips the ice 
 cream freezer fiercely) Ruth Jordan, help me carry 
 this freezer in the house! 
 
 RUTH. And get my dress all rust? Not much. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Unable to lift the tub, sits on it) 
 I ll tell you, my lady, you ll need a rich man to pay 
 your bills ! Perry Carlyle can t do it ! 
 
 RUTH. (Coolly) That s too bad. I m thinking 
 of marrying him. 
 
24 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Starting up) Marry Perry 
 Carlyle ! When did he ask you ? 
 
 RUTH. He hasn t. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Then you can t know! 
 
 RUTH. (Strolling to R.) Oh, yes, I can! Only 
 he doesn t yet ! 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Well, you won t marry him so 
 long s I can help it. (Tugging at freezer) Will 
 you give me a hand with this freezer? 
 
 RUTH. No, I will not, so you might as well wait 
 until papa comes back. 
 
 ^ MRS. JORDAN. If you marry Carlyle, what is Miss 
 Gray going to do ? 
 
 (Enter ANNA GRAY from house. She is a woman 
 of twenty-eight, but looking older; plainly 
 dressed, her hair parted plainly, altogether a 
 plain person.) 
 
 ANNA. (Crossing to hammock sits) Miss 
 Gray is going to climb into the hammock and keep 
 cool. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Well, I hope you can that s all ! 
 I can t ! ( With the strength of anger, she lifts the 
 freezer, and with it is about to exit into house. 
 Boiler cover is throzvn onto stage. She stops puts 
 down -freezer picks up cover throws it over 
 fence L. and exits) 
 
 ANNA. Your mother doesn t seem to be in a 
 very good humor. Anything wrong? 
 
 RUTH. She wanted me to help her carry that 
 freezer. 
 
 ANNA. How did she come to mention my name ? 
 
 RUTH. As a good example to me, as usual. 
 
 ANNA. I m afraid I should be a very poor ex 
 ample for you, Ruth. 
 
 RUTH. I m sure I don t see why. 
 
 ANNA. Oh, you re such a different kind of a girl. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 25 
 
 (RuTH rocks her gently.) 
 
 RUTH. What do you mean by " different kind? " 
 
 ANNA. Why, when you come down to it, there 
 are only two kinds of women. Those to whom men 
 make love and the others. 
 
 RUTH. And you? 
 
 ANNA. I m afraid I m one of the others. 
 
 RUTH. You believe in love, don t you? 
 
 ANNA. Yes. Queer, isn t it? But I do. I be 
 lieve that love, especially the love of women, is a 
 wonderful influence. 
 
 RUTH. That is, the love of women who love. 
 
 ANNA. The love of women who love, kills them ; 
 the love of women who don t, kills others. They 
 are equally an influence. 
 
 RUTH. (Forces herself in hammock beside 
 ANNA shaking off her sobriety, and, laughingly 
 Well, I suppose I m fearfully shallow and frivolous, 
 but I think that love s a good deal of a sham. You 
 make up your mind that you want a man and you 
 hook him in. That s all. 
 
 ANNA. Unfortunately, that isn t all. 
 
 RUTH. Not quite, perhaps. You ve got to have 
 some bait on your hook. 
 
 ANNA. That doesn t sound complimentary. 
 
 RUTH. Yes, it is. (Jumps out of the hammock) 
 You have plenty of bait, but you won t use it. Now 
 what in the world s the sense of having curly hair 
 if you re going to brush it straight, as you do? 
 
 ANNA. (Putting her hands to her hair) It 
 seems quieter. 
 
 RUTH. Good gracious! You don t want to be 
 quiet ! 
 
 ANNA. (Smiling) I m told that you do when 
 fishing. 
 
 RUTH. Oh, I forgot about that long ago. That s 
 
26 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 another thing you ought to remember. Don t be 
 too wise. 
 
 ANNA. Why not? 
 
 RUTH. You can t expect a man to like a woman 
 who knows more than he does. Didn t I hear you 
 talking to Mr. Meade last night about George 
 Eliot? 
 
 ANNA. Perhaps you did. 
 
 RUTH. Well! And I ll bet anything that Mr. 
 Meade doesn t know whether George Eliot was a 
 woman or a play by Clyde Fitch. 
 
 ANNA. Then it s time he learned. 
 
 RUTH. Very true, but don t make him learn from 
 you. For every little boy who loves his teacher, 
 there are fifty who don t. Men are little boys grown 
 up. 
 
 ANNA. Anything more? 
 
 RUTH. Lots. (Surveying her) Your shoes, 
 your dress, everything. You look ten years older 
 than you ought to look. 
 
 ANNA. How do you know how old I ought to 
 look? 
 
 RUTH. No woman ought to look any older than 
 she has to. (Takes a towel from her) What are 
 you sewing? (Inspects it) Of all things a towel. 
 If you must sew in public, why not tidies? 
 
 ANNA. I m short of towels in my room. (Taking 
 back the towel) Go on. 
 
 RUTH. Let s see. (Reflecting. Sits on bench) 
 You don t flatter enough. Make every man be 
 lieve you consider him the climax of creation, 
 but don t let him feel that there aren t a dozen 
 others ready to take his place the moment he steps 
 down and out. 
 
 ANNA. (Rising from hammock, crossing to L.) 
 Ruth, you re too absurd. You don t mean half 
 you say. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 27 
 
 (Enter CARYLE from house.) 
 
 CARLYLE. Hello ! Everybody out here ? 
 
 RUTH. (In an alert tone) Yes. Come on out. 
 I m keeping the hammock for you. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Rather coolly) That s awfully good 
 of you. I guess I ll stand, though. 
 
 RUTH. Doesn t a place by me tempt you? 
 
 CARLYLE. Frightfully! And the one thing I 
 can t resist is temptation. 
 
 ANNA. I know. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Not unkindly) Don t preach, Anna. 
 (Enter BOB, appearing as usual from over the fence) 
 Hello, Bob. How s the boat? 
 
 BOB. I got it here. (Revealing a boat obviously 
 fashioned from a cigar box) You was going to 
 show me how to make it go. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Affectionately) Was I? Let s have 
 it. (Goes to L. c. BOB climbs down, CARLYLE tak 
 ing the vessel from him) 
 
 RUTH. May I see it? I m so interested in toys. 
 (Joins CARLYLE and BOB L. c.) 
 
 CARLYLE. I used to turn these out by the dozen 
 when I was a youngster. (Shows the toy to her 
 she looks it over superficially) 
 
 ANNA. Yes. I remember you made one for me, 
 and I fell in the pond trying to swim it. 
 
 BOB. (With deep disgust) Aw, boats can t 
 swim! 
 
 CARLYLE. (To RUTH) You stretch a rubber 
 band from shaft to shaft, twist a paddle around in 
 it, and let the paddle untwist in the water. (To 
 BOB) Where s the lid? (Bos gives CARLYLE the 
 cover of the box. He takes out a knife with which 
 to cut the zvood into three pieces) 
 
 (Enter MRS. JORDAN from house, followed by 
 SAMUEL MEABE, a man of forty, rather coarse 
 
28 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 in appearance, wearing a heavy black or red 
 moustache and a moderately loud suit of 
 clothes.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Here s Mr. Meade, Miss Gray. I 
 told him he d better come right back. 
 
 ANNA. (Extending hand) Of course. I m glad 
 to see you. 
 
 MEADE. (Crossing and taking her hand) And 
 I m glad to see you. (Nodding to CARLYLE and 
 RUTH) How dy, Carlyle? Evening, Miss Jordan. 
 
 (They nod in reply and continue business with boat, 
 CARLYLE getting on his knees in order to work 
 the better.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I knew Mr. Meade wouldn t mind 
 this bein the back yard. When I was a girl in 
 Virginia we used to have grape arbors at the back 
 of the house, and my grandfather 
 
 MEADE. (Paying no attention to her. Addresses 
 ANNA) I got you this book. You recollect you 
 mentioned it? (Gives her book) 
 
 (MRS. JORDAN angry at being interrupted exits into 
 house.) 
 
 ANNA. (Looking at the cover) Maxine Elliott; 
 An Appreciation. 
 
 ^ MEADE. I couldn t get the one you said George 
 Eliot. I thought this must be his sister. 
 
 ANNA. I m greatly obliged to you. (Going to 
 hammock, sits) 
 
 SAM. You look tired. What s up? Heat been 
 too much for you? 
 
 ANNA. No. I have worked harder than usual 
 to-day. 
 
 SAM. I should think it would make you tired; 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 29 
 
 just counting bills all the time. (Lowers his voice) 
 Say that reminds me, I got a case in your division. 
 
 ANNA. What is it? 
 
 SAM. Thief. 
 
 ANNA. You don t say so. Was it much? 
 
 SAM. Only twenty dollars that we know of. 
 Your chief noticed a lot of condemned twenties 
 torn in a queer way. So he has come to us. 
 
 ANNA. All the "bills that go to the Redemption 
 Agency are mutilated. 
 
 SAM. But these weren t scorched or chewed by 
 rats, or anything like that. Pieces were torn out 
 of them one note torn at the end, one next to the 
 end, one a little farther down, and so on. 
 
 ANNA. Why is that suspicious? I m not in the 
 Secret Service. 
 
 SAM. I couldn t see anything queer about it 
 either, at first. It s a brand new trick and pretty 
 hard to get onto. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Rising the boat still in his hands) 
 What s that? 
 
 MEADE. (Changes his tone to one of carelessness) 
 Oh, just another way of making money without 
 earning it. 
 
 RUTH. (Going to MEADE) Do you mean really 
 making money? 
 
 MEADE. Yes. (Illustrating with a scrap of 
 paper) One of the fellows counting bills tears 
 little pieces off them like this, see? 
 
 RUTH and ANNA. Yes. 
 
 MEADE. He gets a bit from every part of the 
 note. Then he goes home, pastes the bits together, 
 and makes an extra bill ! 
 
 CARLYLE. I should think it would take a very 
 clever man. 
 
 MEADE. Naw ! You ve seen them puzzle pictures 
 that children put together? This is the same thing. 
 Any kid could do it. 
 
30 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 BOB. (To CARLYLE) Come on! Let s finish the 
 
 boat. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Handing him the vessel) After a 
 while. I m talking now. Bring it around to 
 morrow. 
 
 BOB. (Demurring ) Oh! Come on! 
 
 CARLYLE. Go on now! (Exit BOB, much hurt, 
 over the -fence. CARLYLE addresses MEADE) What s 
 done with a bill when it s made? 
 
 MEADE. The fellow spends it just like any 
 other bill. 
 
 RUTH. The tears must show. 
 
 MEADE. If people didn t take torn money there 
 wouldn t be any Redemption Agency. 
 
 ANNA. What about the numbers? (Takes bill 
 from her purse ) Each note is numbered in two 
 places. How does the thief get two numbers alike. 
 
 MEADE. He don t have to. One number can be 
 in the gone part of his bill. So long s he has three- 
 fifths of the note he s O. K. 
 
 RUTH. If it s so easy, I should think it would be 
 done right along. (Goes up to steps, sits) 
 
 MEADE. People don t know about it. A fellow 
 needn t be clever to do a trick like that, but he s 
 got to be mighty clever to invent one. 
 
 CARLYLE. Do you think this fellow will be 
 caught ? 
 
 MEADE. The Lord knows ! 
 
 RUTH. Mr. Meade ! Who was talking to you 
 about our division? 
 
 MEADE. Oh, a lady friend. 
 
 (Enter JORDAN at L., carrying a sack. He is 
 evidently surprised at seeing CARLYLE opposite 
 him.) 
 
 ^ JORDAN. Hello ! You didn t wait for your cakes, 
 did you? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 3 1 
 
 CARLYLE. Only about twenty minutes. 
 
 JORDAN. I ve been waiting for Miss Carruth. 
 She left me in the store and didn t come back. 
 (Sees MEADE) Hello, Sam! 
 
 MEADE. (Shaking hands) Evening, Cap ! Done 
 anything about that self-threading needle of yours? 
 
 JORDAN. No, I ve got a coal mine I m going to 
 open up. There s a million dollars in it for every 
 one there was in the needle. 
 
 MEADE. You d better keep the needle and practice 
 getting a camel though the eye of it. 
 
 (General laughter.) 
 
 RUTH. Papa s been making fortunes ever since 
 I can remember. 
 
 JORDAN. I ll strike it some day. (Goes up steps) 
 Hadn t you all better come in? It s getting dark. 
 
 ANNA. (Rising) Yes ; let s go in. 
 
 (RUTH rises.) 
 
 JORDAN. Come on, Sam. I want to get you in 
 terested in that mine. (Exit JORDAN in house) 
 
 MEADE. (Addressing RUTH who is standing R. 
 of steps) You first. 
 
 RUTH. You re coming, aren t you, Mr. Carlyle? 
 
 CARLYLE. Yes. Right away. 
 
 RUTH. (Making way for MEADE) Apriz vous. 
 Come along ; she ll be in in a minute. (Exeunt RUTH 
 and MEADE in house) 
 
 ANNA. (Rises, starts to go, sees CARLYLE sitting 
 lost in thought) A penny for your thoughts. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Lightly) They re not worth a penny. 
 (More seriously) I was thinking of that poor fel 
 low in the Treasury. If he s caught he will go to 
 the penitentiary. I don t think that a man who takes 
 what isn t his, intending to return it later, is always 
 a thief, do you? 
 
32 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 ANNA. A great many thieves begin that way. 
 
 CARLYLE. It must be pretty tough for a young 
 fellow to be shut up in prison. 
 
 ANNA. A young fellow should think of that and 
 resist the impulse to steal. 
 
 CARLYLE. Somehow stealing from the govern 
 ment doesn t seem exactly like other stealing. 
 Can t you imagine yourself 
 
 ANNA. Yielding to that kind of temptation. No. 
 (Suspicion growing into horror. She looks into his 
 face) Perry ! Perry ! You don t mean that you ? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Convincingly) That I made the 
 twenty dollar bill ? Great God, no ! 
 
 ANNA. Forgive me for asking that question, but 
 you know you have been a little wild lately. 
 
 CARLYLE. Yes, I know. You were quite justified. 
 I wonder about myself sometimes. I I seem to 
 have been going to the devil ever since I left Canton. 
 
 ANNA. Then stop it. 
 
 CARLYLE. I m going to. 
 
 ANNA. Find something to do something that 
 will keep you working and thinking every minute 
 you re out of office. If you d had something im 
 portant to do yesterday afternoon you wouldn t 
 have I never saw you that way before, Perry. 
 
 CARLYLE. I don t think you ll ever see me that 
 way again. 
 
 ANNA. (Trying to joke) You see, Perry, you ve 
 been slipping away from my influence. You need 
 me to look after you. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Seriously) That s no joke, Anna. 
 I don t know what fool things I might do if I 
 hadn t you. 
 
 ANNA. (Happy and embarrassed) Nonsense! 
 
 CARLYLE. No other fellow ever had a friend like 
 you. You deserve to be the happiest woman in the 
 world. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 33 
 
 (Enter MRS. GRAHAM from alley, hurriedly.) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Oh, I hope I m not interrupting. 
 (ANNA withdraws her hands) Has either of you 
 seen Mr. Graham? 
 
 ANNA. Not recently. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Crossing L.) Now, isn t that 
 too provoking? I asked him to meet me in Iowa 
 Circle and take me car riding. 
 
 (Enter MRS. JORDAN with book from house.) 
 
 CARLYLE. He left the table before dinner was 
 over. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. He who? 
 
 ANNA. Mr. Graham. (Exits into house) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. He went out about half an hour 
 ago. Somebody brought him a message a note in 
 a red envelope. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Surprised and angry) A note 
 in a red envelope ! Are you sure it was in an 
 envelope ? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Perfectly. I remember saying it 
 must be from a woman ! He kissed it and hurried 
 off. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. He he kissed a note in a red 
 envelope ! 
 
 CARLYLE. (To MRS. JORDAN) Oh, come now! 
 You can t be certain it was from a woman ! 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I m certain he wouldn t have 
 kissed a note from a man ! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (CARLYLE laughs) And all the 
 time I was walking around that circle waiting for 
 him. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I don t see why it was necessary to 
 meet Mr. Graham elsewhere. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (On verge of tears) It doesn t 
 matter to me what you see, Mrs. Jordan. I ve never 
 been treated so in my life. 
 
34 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 CARLYLE. (Soothingly to MRS. GRAHAM) There.! 
 There ! You d better go in the house. Come along. 
 (Pitts his arm about MRS. GRAHAM S shoulders to 
 lead her into house. Enter GRAHAM at L. passage} 
 
 GRAHAM. (Amazed at the embrace. With quick 
 temper) Here, Carlyle ! (CARLYLE turns to him) 
 What are you doing? 
 
 CARLYLE. What business is it of yours? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Determined to pursue her ad 
 vantage. To GRAHAM) Yes. You don t seem to 
 take me much into account. (Addressing CARLYLE, 
 as though continuing a conversation) It is a beauti 
 ful pipe! Yes, it is! (Takes pipe from his hands) 
 
 GRAHAM. (Bewildered) I don t see what the 
 pipe s got to do with it. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Smiling to GRAHAM) Miss Carruth 
 was a little hysterical. And I asked her to come 
 in the house. (Exits in house) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Catching her breath convul 
 sively) It is a beautiful pipe. It s a beautiful pipe. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Well, I never! (Exits in house) 
 
 (MRS. GRAHAM stands at c. GRAHAM at L. There 
 is a moment s silence, broken by the tones of a 
 flute, playing " There ll be a Hot Time in the 
 Old Town " . Both of the young people, how 
 ever, are too serious for laughter. MRS. 
 GRAHAM turns the pipe over in her hands. Its 
 odor reaches her, and she holds it off in dis 
 gust.) 
 
 GRAHAM. Well? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Well! I ve been walking around 
 Iowa Circle half an hour. 
 
 GRAHAM. Half an hour! / sprinted around it 
 until I felt like Maud S. doing a fast mile ! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Advances to him) Don t tell 
 stories, Dick Graham! I never saw you once! 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 35 
 
 GRAHAM. You re no worse off than I am! I 
 never saw you ! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. But / was at the appointed place. 
 
 GRAHAM. I was all over the appointed place. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. You were not! You got a note 
 in a red envelope, and you kissed it, and and 
 
 GRAHAM. A note in a red envelope! (Fishes it 
 out of his pocket) Of course I did! Your note! 
 
 (Enter BOB. As usual he remains perched on the 
 fence.) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. I didn t put my note in an 
 envelope ! (Suspiciously) Red is the color of Ruth 
 Jordan s stationery! 
 
 GRAHAM. (Goes to her at c.) Don t be foolish! 
 (Takes her paper from envelope) Isn t that your 
 note? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Of course it is. When did you 
 put it in the envelope ? 
 
 GRAHAM. I didn t! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. You did ! 
 
 GRAHAM. I didn t! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. You did ! 
 
 GRAHAM. I didn t! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. You did! 
 
 GRAHAM. I didn t! 
 
 BOB. (Innocently) No, he didn t. I put it in. 
 
 MR. and MRS. GRAHAM. You! 
 
 (Solo ends in meaningless screeches.) 
 
 BOB. Sure ! I thought your note looked nicer in 
 an envelope, so I put it in the one the druggist gave 
 me. 
 
 GRAHAM. Bob! You imp ! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (To GRAHAM) And you kissed 
 my note!_ You dear boy! (Throws her arms 
 around his neck) 
 
36 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 GRAHAM. I must have been chasing you right 
 around that damned circle ! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. It isn t too late for our car ride 
 yet, is it? 
 
 GRAHAM. I should say not! (They go to the 
 alley} 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Here, Bob! Give this pipe to 
 Mr. Carlyle! (Goes up L.) 
 
 GRAHAM. Here, Bob! Here s a half-dollar for 
 you! 
 
 (They lock arms and exeunt L. passage.) 
 
 BOB. Gee whiz! (Looks after them. He bites 
 the coin to satisfy himself of its genuineness and 
 then puts it in his hat. From the same source he 
 extracts a match, with which he lights the pipe, 
 puffing at it with apparent lack of pleasure) That s 
 fine! 
 
 (The wild footings of the flute melt into: "Because 
 I Love You " . The yard is lighted by the moon 
 and by rays from the kitchen. Enter MEADE 
 and ANNA from house. MEADE does not see 
 BOB.) 
 
 MEADE. Excuse me for trotting you off so quick. 
 I wanted to talk to you. 
 
 ANNA. (Slightly amused) Weren t you talking 
 to me? 
 
 MEADE. I wanted to talk to you alone where 
 nobody else could listen. 
 
 ANNA. (Nodding at BOB, who still sits on the 
 fence, his distaste for the pipe growing more evident 
 every instant) You ve selected a bad place then. 
 Bob has sharp ears. 
 
 MEADE. (Turns) Go away, Bob; that s a good 
 fellow. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 37 
 
 BOB. Can t. Got to hand this pipe to Mr. 
 Carlyle. 
 
 MEADE. (Goes to BOB) I ll give it to him. 
 
 BOB. Won t do. 
 
 MEADE. And I ll give you a quarter. (Takes 
 silver from his pocket) 
 
 BOB. Make it a half? 
 
 MEADE. I ve only got a quarter in change. 
 
 BOB. Have you got a dollar ? 
 
 MEADE. Yes. 
 
 BOB. I can change it. (Takes half dollar out of 
 hat) 
 
 MEADE. (Laughing, gives him the bill) Here 
 then. 
 
 BOB. Here s your half and here s the pipe. 
 (Gives him both articles) Say, you re a real sport. 
 (Exit BOB over fence. ANNA and MEADE laugh) 
 
 ANNA. You shouldn t have given him that money. 
 
 MEADE. It was blackmail, wasn t it? (Couies 
 down to her, folding bills to return to his pocket) 
 Miss Gray, will you marry me? 
 
 ANNA. (Under the impression that he jests) Is 
 that a conundrum? 
 
 MEADE. I m not kidding. It s a plain question 
 and I d like a plain answer. 
 
 ANNA. (Realizing Jiis seriousness) I beg your 
 pardon. You shall have it. No. 
 
 MEADE. I didn t think you would. (Evidently 
 staggered a bit, notwithstanding his assertion, he 
 starts to return to the house) 
 
 ANNA. Why did you ask me then? 
 
 MEADE. (Stops and turns toward her) Same as 
 any other fellow because I love you. I think 
 you re the grandest girl I ever met. Of course, 
 I m a plain kind of a chap 
 
 ANNA. That isn t why I said " no ". 
 
 MEADE. Is isn t? You love someone else. By 
 Jingo ! I never thought of that ! Who is he ? (Ad- 
 
38 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 vances toward her) Excuse me! I haven t any 
 right to know! (Goes up to house stops, points 
 towards same, conveying idea that it is CARLYLE, 
 turns and speaks) He s a nice fellow. Good-night. 
 ANNA. (Follows him) Let me see you to the 
 door. 
 
 (Enter CARLYLE and RUTH from house. They are 
 in high spirits, and lift the tone of the scene at 
 once.) 
 
 RUTH. Hello ! Been taking advantage of the 
 moon? 
 
 MEADE. Sort of. 
 
 RUTH. If you re through with it we d like to use 
 it a while ourselves. (Goes to hammock and sits) 
 
 (ANNA is surprised. Regarding PERRY, she realizes 
 the import of RUTH S words, and, suppressing 
 her emotions, goes up the steps.) 
 
 ^ MEADE. (Giving CARLYLE his pipe) I was to 
 give you this. 
 
 CARLYLE. Thank you. 
 
 ANNA. (To MEADE) Come, Mr. Meade. 
 
 (They exeunt in house.) 
 
 RUTH. (In hammock) He s just proposed to 
 her. 
 
 CARLYLE. Do you think so? 
 
 RUTH. Yes. And she refused him. 
 
 CARLYLE. How can you tell? 
 
 RUTH. I saw her face. You re keeping that girl 
 from happiness. 
 
 o ARLYLE Kee P in Anna ^om happiness? I? 
 What do you mean? 
 
 RUTH. Can t you see that she s head over heels 
 in love with Mr. Meade? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 39 
 
 CARLYLE. (Dazed -for a moment. Then, with a 
 short laugh, dismisses the matter) Why, that s 
 impossible! Anna and I 
 
 RUTH. (Quickly) She told me herself there was 
 no engagement between you. 
 
 CARLYLE. No. No engagement. Only I felt that 
 the matter was well, understood. 
 
 RUTH. You felt that she was waiting to say 
 " yes " whenever you got ready to ask her. You 
 weren t sure you wanted her yourself, but you 
 were willing to prevent her taking the man she 
 wants. 
 
 CARLYLE. I wouldn t do that for the world. I ll 
 tell her to-night. I ll tell her she needn t consider 
 herself bound to me. 
 
 RUTH. I would. (There is a pause. RUTH 
 swings herself. When she speaks it is in a lighter 
 tone) Don t look so serious. 
 
 CARLYLE. I feel serious. 
 
 RUTH. If it were me, I d be too proud to worry 
 about a girl who didn t care for me. 
 
 CARLYLE. I m not worrying. I m glad Anna is 
 going to be happy. (Goes to hammock) It never 
 rains but what it pours. I ve lost about everything 
 else in this town, and I was trying to win it 
 back because of Anna. Now I ve lost her, too. 
 What s the use ? 
 
 RUTH. Maybe the use is somebody who cares 
 for you. 
 
 CARLYLE. Who ? 
 
 RUTH. Somebody. (Leans against him) As you 
 just said: "What s the use?" You don t give a 
 pin for her. 
 
 CARLYLE. Oh, yes yes I do. 
 
 RUTH. Just now perhaps because it s night, 
 and my dress is pretty and my hair soft in the 
 moonlight. 
 
40 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 (Very softly and slowly, the strains of: "Believe 
 Me If All Those Endearing Young Charms," 
 played on the flute, drift into the air.} 
 
 CARLYLE. There s your answer. (Speaks the 
 lines of the song) 
 
 Believe me if all those endearing young charms, 
 
 Which I gaze on so fondly to-day, 
 
 Were to change by to-morrow, and fleet in my arms, 
 
 Like fairy gifts fading away, 
 
 Thou wouldst still be beloved, as this moment thou 
 
 art, 
 
 Let thy loveliness fade as it will, 
 And around the dear ruin each wish of my heart 
 Would entwine itself verdantly still. 
 
 (The music ceases. RUTH reaches up and presses 
 CARLYLE S hands. He kisses her) Oh, I shouldn t 
 
 RUTH. Why not? There isn t anyone else, and 
 and you meant that song for me, didn t you? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Looking at house) Yes. 
 
 RUTH. Isn t it dear that he should have played 
 that just then? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Absently) Very dear. 
 
 RUTH. We ll remember it all our lives. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (From within) Ruth! 
 
 RUTH. Oh, bother! 
 
 CARLYLE. Don t answer. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (From within) Ruth! Ruth! 
 I want you ! 
 
 RUTH. (Calling, going to center) Yes! Com 
 ing! (Rises. To CARLYLE) I ll have to go. 
 Listen when you tell Miss Gray don t mention 
 her affair or ours. 
 
 CARLYLE. Of course not. 
 
 MRS JORDAN. (From within) Ruth Jordan! 
 
 RUTH. (Calling) Mother, do have! some 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 41 
 
 patience. (To CARLYLE) Perry, run to the corner 
 and get me some roses. Bring them to my room. 
 CARLYLE. I will. (Going up towards passage 
 L. stops returns and kisses her) 
 
 (Exit CARLYLE hastily at L. RUTH goes to porch 
 and is about to exit when the flutist repeats: 
 Believe Me If All Those Endearing Young 
 Charms " As she pauses an instant, enter 
 ANNA from house.) 
 
 RUTH. Back again, Anna, dear. 
 
 ANNA. Isn t that pretty? 
 
 RUTH. (Affectedly) It s the most glorious love 
 song in the world. 
 
 ANNA. (Surprised) I thought you didn t be 
 lieve in love. 
 
 RUTH. I believe in love songs. They help out so. 
 (Crosses R. c.) 
 
 ANNA. (Puzzled) Yes. Where s Perry? 
 
 RUTH. He went to the end of the alley. 
 (Maliciously) Where s Mr. Meade? Are con 
 gratulations in order? (c.) 
 
 ANNA. You know they re not! 
 
 RUTH, (Goes up) Oh, I didn t mean to be 
 premature. (Turns on steps) Don t forget to bait 
 your hook, Anna. (Exit RUTH in house) 
 
 (ANNA looks after her. CARLYLE enters from 
 alley, walking fast and carrying a bunch of 
 roses. He does not attempt to hide these upon 
 seeing ANNA. His conduct throughout the 
 scene is that of a man who thinks he is doing 
 the manly thing. ANNA S suffering is plain to 
 audience, but not to CARLYLE.) 
 
 CARLYLE. Oh ! Anna ! 
 
42 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 ANNA. Roses ! Aren t you being just a little 
 extravagant, Perry? 
 
 CARLYLE. Roses aren t very expensive in June, 
 you know. 
 
 ANNA. Well, perhaps not. (Starts to return to 
 house) I suppose you want to use the moonlight 
 a while longer. 
 
 CARLYLE. No. I m going in presently. I d like to 
 have a word with you. 
 
 ANNA. (Plappy at the prospect of hearing him 
 say he loves her) With me ? 
 
 CARLYLE. Yes. I I 
 
 ANNA. (Tenderly) Is it so hard to say? 
 
 CARLYLE. (More at ease. Smiles) Rather. 
 (Business zvith roses) Anna, you and I have known 
 each other ever since we were children. 
 
 ANNA. Since you were a tiny, bare-legged boy, 
 and I was a gawky little girl. 
 
 CARLYLE. It was always understood that some 
 day we were to be married. I suppose I ve been 
 rather conceited and and ungenerous about the 
 matter. It never occurred to me that you might 
 want to get out of the bargain. 
 
 ANNA. I? What are you talking about, Perry? 
 
 CARLYLE. Since we came to Washington I ve 
 noticed that we ve been drifting apart. I don t 
 blame you. You ve been interested in steadier 
 people and I of course, I haven t panned out 
 particularly well. 
 
 ANNA. I haven t asked to be let out of of what 
 you just called our bargain. 
 
 CARLYLE. That s just it. You haven t asked. 
 You ve been too fine and faithful. But I 
 
 ANNA. (Rises and speaks with a great effort) 
 You want your freedom ? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Rises) No! No! I want to give 
 you yours. Honestly you don t care anything for 
 me? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 43 
 
 ANNA. (Hurt to the quick) As as a friend 
 
 CARLYLE. Certainly as a friend. You re the 
 best friend I ever had. But you don t love me? 
 
 ANNA. No. 
 
 CARLYLE. And you don t feel that you that we 
 are bound by what has been between us? 
 
 ANNA. No. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Worried at her tone) And you re 
 not annoyed at me for coming to you about the 
 matter ? 
 
 ANNA. No, Perry, no ! For a long time I ve 
 thought about coming to you. It s a great deal 
 better that we should understand. (She crosses to 
 c.) 
 
 CARLYLE. Yes; isn t it? That s just what I 
 thought. Now we can go on in the same old 
 way and be good friends. 
 
 ANNA. Yes. 
 
 CARLYLE. Won t you shake hands? 
 
 ANNA. Yes. (She gives him her hand, recoils 
 and withdraws it) 
 
 CARLYLE. I told you that you deserved to be the 
 happiest woman in the world. I hope you will be. 
 
 ANNA. I hope you ll be happy, too, Perry. 
 
 CARLYLE. Remember ! I don t hold you to any 
 thing. (Going, drops a rose in front of the steps. 
 He steps on the porch and turns to her again. Once 
 more the room behind the curtains at the upper 
 window is illuminated) I want you to understand 
 that I didn t mention this for my own sake. (RUTH, 
 at her piano, in the second story apartment, begins 
 playing: "Believe Me If All Those Endearing 
 Young Charms". There is a moment s silence on 
 the part of ANNA and CARLYLE) That s a beautiful 
 song, isn t it? (Exits in house) 
 
 (ANNA stands perfectly still, staring ahead of 
 
44 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 her, then sinks on bench, crying. A strong 
 yellow light from the kitchen door illumines 
 her.) 
 
 Curtain 
 
 (i) ANNA still sitting on bench crying. 
 (2) ANNA, going up, discovers rose, kisses it, and 
 exits in house. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 45 
 
 ACT II 
 
 SCENE : Miss GRAY S room at MRS. JORDAN S. The 
 conventional " second story front " in a board 
 ing-house, commonplace from the figured paper 
 that adorns the walls to the faded red carpet 
 that covers the floor. Several engravings, of 
 the order of " Daniel in the Den of Lions," and 
 a large painting of a mill by a stream hang in 
 prominent positions. Tzvo or three chairs, 
 upholstered zvith red or yellow plush, are scat 
 tered about the apartment. A table, bearing 
 magazines, a sewing basket, an alarm clock, 
 and various other sundries, is at L. c. Beside 
 it is a Morris chair zuith a hassock at its feet. 
 A particularly large flat couch, loaded with 
 pillows, at R. c. At R. i E. and R. 3 E. are 
 windows behind lace curtains, and between these 
 are an upright piano, with a mirror hung over 
 it, and a music rack. Down-stage at R. a writ 
 ing desk. In the flat, at c., a door zvhich when 
 open, admits a partial viezv of the hall and the 
 head of a flight of stairs. R. of this door a 
 bookcase, well- filled, and L. of it a funereal 
 mantelpiece of white marble. No fire is burn 
 ing in the grate, and it is evident that none is 
 intended to burn there. At L. I E. a door lead 
 ing to a sort of closet. Whatever there is of 
 cheerfulness or good taste about the apartment 
 is given it by certain belongings of Miss GRAY S 
 photographs, bric-a-brac, a table lamp, etc. 
 
 TIME: It is 7:45 o clock on an evening early- in 
 October. 
 
46 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 DISCOVERED: ANNA is discovered seated at the 
 piano playing some simple melody slowly and 
 softly. The sound of animated discussion is 
 heard in the hall, and, ds the noise grows 
 louder, she abandons the instrument to listen. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Off R., from without) You haven t 
 any right to take things from my room ! 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Off R., from without) They 
 weren t addressed to you. 
 
 GRAHAM. I don t give a continental who they 
 were addressed to. They were on my table; that s 
 enough. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Anyone would say that I was 
 doing you a kindness. 
 
 GRAHAM. I don t want kindness. I want to be 
 let alone. Please remember that in future. I want 
 to be let severely alone. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. It s a pretty how-do-you-do 
 
 GRAHAM. That s what I think! Good-night! 
 (Knocks at the door R.) 
 
 ANNA. Come in. (She rises from the piano 
 stool. Enter GRAHAM. He is obviously angry and 
 carries four or five letters} You seem to be put 
 out. 
 
 GRAHAM. I m not put out, but I m infernally 
 likely to get out. What do you think ? Mrs. Jordan 
 quietly goes into my room and takes possession of a 
 pile of letters lying on my table. 
 ANNA. Were they your letters? 
 GRAHAM. What has that to do with it? (Comes 
 down-stage) No; they were Miss Carruth s letters. 
 
 ANNA. Perhaps Mrs. Jordan thought 
 
 GRAHAM. I don t pay Mrs. Jordan to think, I 
 pay her for board and lodging. 
 
 ANNA. Well, you know, it does look queer. I m 
 not inclined to mix in other people s affairs, but 
 what were you doing with Miss Carruth s mail? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 47 
 
 GRAHAM. Why, I was going to read it. This 
 letter is from her mother. 
 
 ANNA. Has Miss Carruth asked you to read 
 letters from her mother? 
 
 GRAHAM. No. Not exactly. The fact is con 
 found it, can you keep a secret ? 
 
 ANNA. I m keeping a good many. 
 
 GRAHAM. Well, then, I m going to tell you! 
 (Lowers his voice) Miss Carruth is my wife. 
 (ANNA bursts into laughter) Is there anything 
 funny about that? 
 
 ANNA. (Still laughing) Pardon me. Can you 
 keep a secret? 
 
 GRAHAM. (Mystified) I guess so. 
 
 ANNA. Well then, I m going to tell you. 
 (Lowers her voice in imitation of him) I know r 
 she is ! 
 
 GRAHAM. (Greatly surprised) Who told you? 
 
 ANNA. You ! 
 
 GRAHAM. Never until this moment. 
 
 ANNA. Never in so many words. But when I 
 see a wedding ring suspended on the inside of a 
 woman s shirtwaist, I draw my own conclusions. 
 
 GRAHAM. Good Heavens! That s the evil of 
 peek-a-boo waists ! I wonder if Mrs. Jordan saw 
 that ring. 
 
 ANNA. If she had, she wouldn t be making all 
 this trouble. 
 
 GRAHAM. Trouble ! That woman is driving me 
 to an early grave. 
 
 ANNA. How? (Sits R. of table) 
 
 GRAHAM. By her persecutions. Yesterday she 
 found a pair of Mrs. Graham s garters in my room. 
 Of course, she didn t know whose garters they were, 
 and she is convinced that I am a hopeless mixture of 
 Lothario and Don Juan. 
 
 ANNA. Poor man. (Laughing) 
 
48 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 GRAHAM. She must have told the Captain, too. 
 Whenever he meets me he winks. 
 
 ANNA. (Still laughing heartily) Oh, dear! 
 
 GRAHAM. She s always discovering photographs 
 of my wife with affectionate inscriptions on them, 
 and I don t think I ve kissed Edith once this month 
 that that dragon hasn t materialized out of thin air 
 in front of me. 
 
 ANNA. Why don t you confess the whole thing 
 to her? 
 
 GRAHAM. Because it would be public property 
 inside of twenty-four hours, and Edith would lose 
 her position. (Going dozvn L.) 
 
 ANNA. But Mrs. Jordan knows a married woman 
 can t work in the departments. 
 
 GRAHAM. That wouldn t keep her quiet. No; 
 we ll be going to South America next month, and 
 we can stand it until then ! 
 
 ANNA. You ll be a bigamist by that time. Mrs. 
 Jordan will have you married to Ruth. 
 
 GRAHAM. Did you ever see anyone as persistent 
 as she is about that? She s determined that Ruth 
 shan t marry Carlyle. (ANNA, who has been sewing 
 at table, puts her -work in the basket, rises, and 
 walks silently to R.) By George! She isn t any 
 more anxious about that than I am! 
 
 ANNA. (Turning to him) Why you? 
 
 GRAHAM. Because I m fond of Carlyle. Can t 
 you see what that girl is doing with him? 
 
 ANNA. (Agitated) Yes! Yes! 
 
 GRAHAM. I don t believe she s a bad kind of a 
 girl. She s just a fool, and sets a pace that Carlyle 
 can t keep up. (Going up to her; the table between 
 them) Why, their tickets for the theater to-night 
 cost $4. You can t do that sort of a thing on a hun 
 dred a month. 
 
 ANNA. Perry has his mother, too. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 49 
 
 GRAHAM. (Walking away again) You re a 
 friend of his. Why don t you speak to him? 
 
 ANNA. For that reason. He wouldn t under 
 stand. (Faces GRAHAM with sudden resolution) 
 No ; I m willing that he should think what he pleases 
 of me, but it would be no use. 
 
 GRAHAM. I hate to see a good manly chap being 
 led by the nose. I ve begged him to go to Venezuela 
 for me, but he won t do it. 
 
 ANNA. If you had known him out West. (Her 
 tears choke her. She walks to the mantel, and then 
 turns toivard GRAHAM) Oh, I wish to God that 
 neither he nor I had ever seen Washington. (Knock 
 at door) 
 
 GRAHAM. Sch! That must be Mrs. Jordan. 
 (Crosses to R.) 
 
 ANNA. Come in. 
 
 (Enter RUTH. She is neatly dressed in a traveling 
 suit, and looks most unprepared for the 
 theater.) 
 
 RUTH. (Nods to GRAHAM addresses ANNA) 
 Good-evening, dear. Have you an alcohol lamp 
 you could lend me? 
 
 ANNA. (Coldly) There s one in the closet. 
 (Goes to door at L., GRAHAM crossing her to R.) 
 Are you .going to wear that dress to the theater? 
 
 RUTH. (Slightly confused) Yes, my best gown 
 is at the cleaner s. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Looking at his watch) You ought to 
 be leaving. It s getting late. 
 
 RUTH. (Hitching at her skirt to pull up her 
 stocking) We can drive to the National in five 
 minutes. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Sotto voice. Raising his eyebrows) 
 Drive ! ! 
 
 RUTH. (Repeats business with skirt. Addresses 
 
50 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 ANNA) I m afraid you ll have to let me go with you 
 a moment. (Whispers) My garter s broken. 
 
 ANNA. (Ungraciously) All right. (They go to 
 door L. ANNA addresses GRAHAM) Excuse me. 
 (Exeunt ANNA and RUTH. Knock at the door c. 
 ANNA puts her head out of the other door) Will 
 you see who that is, please? (She closes the door 
 L. GRAHAM goes tip-stage and opens door c.) 
 
 GRAHAM. Oh, Carlyle! 
 
 (Enter CARLYLE. He is carefully dressed, but looks 
 haggard and worn. He walks wearily to c., and 
 drops into the Morris chair.) 
 
 CARLYLE. Hello, Graham. What are you doing 
 here? 
 
 GRAHAM. Calling. (Indicating the door L.) 
 Both the girls are in there. What s the matter with 
 you? 
 
 CARLYLE. I ve got a bad headache. 
 
 GRAHAM. Been drinking again? 
 
 CARLYLE. A little. 
 
 GRAHAM. You want to quit that. 
 
 CARLYLE. Oh, don t you preach. If you had as 
 much as on your mind as I have, you d drink, too. 
 
 GRAHAM. Maybe. I don t claim to be better 
 than anybody else. (Sits R.) 
 
 CARLYLE. The only difference between bad men 
 and good men is a difference of opportunity. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Coming down) Granted. Now, why 
 don t you go to Venezuela? 
 
 CARLYLE. Don t bring that up again. 
 
 GRAHAM. I need someone there until I arrive and 
 I ll need someone after. I ll give you $75 a month 
 and keep. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Drawing his hand across his head) 
 Old man, if you knew how my head aches 
 
 GRAHAM. (Eagerly) There s a boat sailing dav 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 51 
 
 after to-morrow from New York. You can get 
 ready and leave here to-morrow night. Listen now ! 
 You re throwing your life away working for the 
 Government. There s no future for you for any 
 body. I wouldn t stay here another year for a 
 million dollars. Come on! Buck up, old fellow, 
 and clear out. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Rising, pathetically) You know I 
 can t go and you know why. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Angry) Because of a woman. 
 
 CARLYLE. You re always roasting women. 
 
 GRAHAM. I m always doing no such thing. I 
 think women are the finest articles turned out of the 
 Celestial workshop. I think a woman like Miss 
 Gray would do you more good than the gold cure. 
 But Ruth Jordan 
 
 CARLYLE. (Firmly) Now, drop that. 
 
 GRAHAM. I won t drop it, Carlyle, and you know 
 why I won t. I like you and I m not going to see 
 you drift into utter ruin without trying to stop you. 
 (Goes to him and puts his hand on his shoulder) 
 Old fellow, you don t realize how you ve changed 
 in the past four months since the night you told 
 me you didn t care anything about Miss Jordan. 
 
 CARLYLE. I didn t then. 
 
 GRAHAM. You don t now ; you only think you do. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Rises and crosses) Does it strike you 
 that you re pretty blunt? 
 
 GRAHAM. I m about to be blunter. This girl s 
 just fascinated you. In the beginning her hold on 
 you wasn t worth that. (Snaps his fingers) Now 
 you re with her all the time and she does about 
 whit she pleases with you. 
 
 CARLYLE." You re talking nonsense. 
 
 GRAHAM. Oh, you think she doesn t, but she does. 
 I don t believe the girl means wrong, but she s taken 
 away your pride and your strength and your sense 
 of responsibility. You didn t drink a drop when 
 
52 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 you came to Washington. You saved your money 
 and took care of your mother 
 
 CARLYLE. I still do. 
 
 GRAHAM. You were as different from what you 
 are now as chalk is from cheese. You d be your 
 self again if you had a decent chance, but you ll 
 never have a chance while you and Ruth Jordan are 
 in Washington. I m offering you an opportunity. 
 What do you say to it? 
 
 CARLYLE. I say that I won t let you or anyone 
 else speak ill of a woman I know. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Stands staring at him a moment. 
 Then furiously) You can go to the devil. (Rushes 
 up to the door c., opens it, then cools down, closes 
 it, and faces CARLYLE) But you d better go to 
 Venezuela. 
 
 CARLYLE. That s more like it. (GRAHAM comes 
 down) Graham, I won t go to South America, but 
 there s one service you can do me. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Dubiously) What is it? 
 
 CARLYLE. Lend me fifty dollars. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Sucks in his lips) M m! When? 
 
 CARLYLE. To-night. I ve got to have it to-night, 
 or it won t do me the least good. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Taking bills from his pocket) I 
 haven t ten dollars about me. What do you want 
 with it ? 
 
 CARLYLE. I can t tell you. 
 
 GRAHAM. Some foolishness? 
 
 CARLYLE. No. (Goe s to him) Graham, it s 
 damned serious. (Takes zvallet from his pocket) 
 I ve got money here, but it isn t mine and I d rather 
 not spend it. Unless you can let me have $50 I 
 must. 
 
 GRAHAM. I haven t got $50, Carlyle. (Pocket 
 ing the bills and walking L.) No; and I don t be 
 lieve I d give it to you if I had. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Throwing his wallet on the desk and 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 53 
 
 following GRAHAM) Why? Are you afraid you 
 wouldn t get it back? 
 
 GRAHAM. A few minutes ago I told you to go to 
 the devil. 
 
 CARLYLE. Well ? 
 
 GRAHAM. Well! Why the devil can t you go 
 without my help? (Exit at c., slamming the door 
 behind him) 
 
 CARLYLE. (Calls after him) Graham! (There 
 is no reply. He suddenly becomes limp) 
 
 (Enter RUTH at L. with alcohol lamp in hand. She . 
 leaves the door open, advances a few step s, sees 
 CARLYLE. Returns and closes it. Crosses to R.) 
 
 RUTH. (In a low tone) Have you got our 
 tickets to Baltimore? 
 
 CARLYLE. No, I haven t. Look here. What s 
 the use of sneaking away to be married as though 
 we were committing a crime. 
 
 RUTH. What s the use. Supposing you ask 
 Mamma ? 
 
 CARLYLE. Why not be married secretly down 
 town, then? I don t see why you insisted on Balti 
 more? 
 
 RUTH. Do you w r ant to back out? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Irresolutely} No. I think we ought 
 to postpone it, though. 
 
 RUTH. I m in my traveling gown, my valise is 
 packed, I ve made all my arrangements to go from 
 the theater to the depot. If we postpone the wed 
 ding now, we postpone it indefinitely. (Enter 
 ANNA at L. A bell rings off-stage) Here s Anna. 
 
 ANNA. How do you do, Perry? 
 
 CARLYLE. I m not well. 
 
 RUTH. (Goes to door c. The sweetness of her 
 tone in marked contrast with her sternness of an 
 
54 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 instant before) We shall be late, Perry. I ve got 
 to stop for my hat, you know. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Addresses ANNA at her elbozv) 
 Anna, I wonder if (Stops short) 
 
 ANNA. If what? 
 
 CARLYLE. Nothing. I couldn t get it from you 
 for that. Good-night. (Goes tip-stage and joins 
 RUTH) 
 
 RUTH. Good-night, Anna. 
 
 ANNA. Good-night, Miss Jordan. 
 
 (Exeunt CARLYLE and RUTH. They leave the door 
 open. ANNA sighs, and going to the table, picks 
 up her sewing. Sits R. of table. Without hav 
 ing knocked enter MRS. JORDAN, at c. a large 
 pasteboard box in her hands.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Miss Gray, what do you think? 
 
 ANNA. Oh, Mrs. Jordan, I didn t hear you 
 knock. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I was that agitated I reckon I for 
 got to knock. Did you hear the front door-bell a 
 minute ago? 
 
 ANNA. I don t remember. I suppose so. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Well, it was a boy from the Palais 
 Royal with this box for Mr. Graham. I thought it 
 was kind of funny Mr. Graham getting things at 
 the Palais, but I didn t say nothin . 
 
 (NOTE: In Washington the first word in Palais 
 Royal is given the French, and the second word 
 the English pronunciation.) 
 
 ANNA. Naturally. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. But coming upstairs the cover 
 fell off the box. Well, what do you suppose was 
 in it? 
 
 ANNA. That name of the maker? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. No. (Placing the box on the piano 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 55 
 
 stool and holding aloft a lace night gown and a 
 corset cover) These ! 
 
 ANNA. (Restraining her laughter} I didn t 
 know men wore lace night gowns. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Sniffs) Men, indeed ! I reckon 
 you didn t know men wore these either. (Holding 
 tip a pair of embroidered opera stockings) Now I 
 want to know what Mr. Graham intends to do with 
 them. 
 
 ANNA. Christmas is coming. He may want to 
 hang them up for Santa Claus. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Santa Claus your Grandmother ! 
 He s going to give them to Miss Carruth. Posi 
 tively indecent I call it. (Fingers the stockings 
 lovingly) And Ruth almost out of stockings, too. 
 
 ANNA. (Takes stockings from her work-basket) 
 Yes. So am I. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Her anger rising) What would 
 you advise me to do about it? (A bell rings off 
 stage) 
 
 ANNA. Since that probably is Mr. Graham at 
 the bell, I should advise you to tie up the box as 
 carefully as possible and take it to him at once. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Tying up the box) But in my 
 house ! 
 
 . ANNA. I suppose Miss Carruth needs stockings 
 in your house as in any other. (Enter JORDAN c., 
 first knocking on door. He carries a tray with a 
 card on it and comes down back of table, somewhat 
 pompously) -Good-evening, Captain. 
 
 JORDAN. Good-evening, Miss Gray. 
 
 ANNA. (Reading card) Show him up, please. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Who is it? 
 
 ANNA. Mr. Meade. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Goodness, and I m not dressed. 
 (ANNA turns quickly to mirror and touches her 
 hair. MRS. JORDAN redoubles her haste in closing 
 box) 
 
56 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 JORDAN. (Leaning over balustrade outside} 
 Come along, Sam. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Henry, you are in such a hurry. 
 (Takes box under her arm. The stockings are hang- 
 ing out of it) I ll be in after a while, Miss Gray. 
 {Exit at c.) 
 
 JORDAN. (Gravely bowing MEADE in) This way. 
 
 (Enter MEADE.) 
 
 ANNA. (To MEADE) This is an unexpected 
 treat. 
 
 MEADE. Thanks. (To JORDAN shaking his hand) 
 Hello, Cap. How are the mines? 
 
 JORDAN. (Losing his dignity immediately and 
 coming down) Well, I ll tell you, Sam. I haven t 
 been able to do much with them. The Coal Trust s 
 got capital scared. I ve got a bill before Congress 
 now. 
 
 MEADE. Pension ? 
 
 JORDAN. No. I never was a soldier. 
 
 MEADE. How d you get your title? 
 
 JORDAN. Canal boat. (Sits on piano stool) 
 This is a bill to build a home for survivors of the 
 Custer Massacre. It s worth a hundred thousand 
 dollars to me if it passes. 
 
 MEADE. I hope it passes. Good-bye. 
 
 JORDAN. Good-bye. (Rises. To ANNA) Good 
 night, Miss Gray. 
 
 ANNA. Good-night, Captain. (Exit JORDAN at 
 c.) Poor old fellow. 
 
 MEADE. (Places his hat on piano and looking 
 about) Got it pretty nice here, haven t you? 
 (Points to door L.) That another room? 
 
 ANNA. (Sits L. of table) A kind of large closet. 
 I keep my wash-stand in there, but the room s not of 
 much use. There s no window in it. 
 
 MEADE. (Turning to window) You get plenty 
 of light from here. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 57 
 
 ANNA. And air. Especially in winter. 
 
 MEADE. (Looking at picture on piano) Who s 
 this? 
 
 ANNA. My brother Fred. 
 
 MEADE. Humph. (Takes another picture) This 
 Carlyle? 
 
 ANNA. Yes. 
 
 MEADE. (Reading from the back) "To my 
 little gray lady. Canton, September 3, 1895." Five 
 years ago. 
 
 ANNA. Yes. 
 
 MEADE. (Putting picture back) Now he s 
 engaged to Miss Jordan. 
 
 ANNA. Yes. 
 
 MEADE. That s what I call a dirty, sneaking 
 trick. 
 
 ANNA. We won t talk about it if you please, Mr. 
 Meade. 
 
 MEADE. Will you marry me now ? 
 
 ANNA. No. 
 
 MEADE. Why? 
 
 ANNA. Because I don t love you. 
 
 MEADE. You d better marry a man you don t 
 love than a man who don t love you. 
 
 ANNA. I shan t marry anyone, Mr. Meade. 
 Will you sit down? 
 
 MEADE. Thanks. (Sits R. of table. There is a 
 long silence. ANNA sews, MEADE catches sight of 
 CARLYLE S wallet, picks it up, looks it over carefully, 
 and drops it on the desk again} 
 
 ANNA. (Smiling) Haven t you any more to say? 
 
 MEADE. Lots. 
 
 ANNA. Say it. 
 
 MEADE. (Troubled) It s not easy to say. 
 (Resolutely) Miss Gray, did you ever take any 
 money that didn t belong to you? 
 
 ANNA. Yes. (MEADE leans towards her) Once 
 
58 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 I took a quarter from my mother s purse to buy 
 gumdrops with. I was whipped for it. 
 
 (MEADE relaxes.) 
 
 MEADE. (Playing with CARLYLE S wallet) I 
 don t mean that. I mean did you ever take any 
 money out of the Treasury Department? 
 
 ANNA. Mr. Meade!! 
 
 MEADE. You needn t get huffy. Lots of good 
 people have. 
 
 ANNA. Why do you come to me? 
 
 MEADE. Because this hundred dollar bill was 
 marked. The minute it s spent -I ve got the thief. 
 
 ANNA. And so? 
 
 MEADE. If you took it you d better tear it up. 
 Did you take it ? 
 
 ANNA. Why, what a question. 
 
 MEADE. I want a square no. 
 
 ANNA. (Looking him in the face) No. 
 
 MEADE. That s enough. (Rises relieved) 
 
 ANNA. Mr. Meade, you asked me to marry you 
 a moment ago, believing that I might be a thief ? 
 
 MEADE. Why, what s that got to do with it ? As 
 I said, plenty of good people make mistakes. Any 
 way, I don t love you because you re honest. I love 
 you because you re you. 
 
 ANNA. Oh. 
 
 MEADE. Now will you marry me? 
 
 ANNA. (Smiling wistfully) No, and I know just 
 how fine a man I m giving up, too. 
 
 MEADE. That don t do me much good. 
 
 ANNA. So it was a hundred dollar bill this time. 
 
 MEADE. One of the yellow boys. 
 
 ANNA. Made the same way the other was? 
 
 MEADE. Same way, out of pieces torn from 
 mutilated bills. 
 
 ANNA. What made you suspect me? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 59 
 
 MEADE. One of the packages inspected came 
 from you. The bills in it weren t torn very much 
 out of the ordinary. Nobody d have noticed them 
 if it hadn t been for the other bundles. 
 
 ANNA. Who counted the other bundles? 
 
 MEADE. Upton, Ruth Jordan and Carlyle. 
 
 ANNA. It looks ugly for all of us. 
 
 MEADE. It s going to be ugly for somebody. I ve 
 got something in my pocket here that ll pretty nearly 
 settle the maker of that note when it gets back to the 
 Treasury. (Tap s pocket) 
 
 ANNA. In your pocket now? 
 
 MEADE. Yes. Pinned in. Couldn t take any 
 chances of losing it. (Rising) Of course mum s 
 the word. I d get into hot water if the chief found 
 I d talked. (Takes his hat from piano where it has 
 lain, and brushes it with his sleeve) 
 
 ANNA. What s your hurry? It s early yet. 
 
 MEADE. (Looking at his watch) Nearly ten! 
 (Replaces watch) Besides, I ve said all I came to 
 say. Good-night. 
 
 ANNA. (Shakes hands with him) Well, good 
 night, and thank you for your generous warning. 
 
 MEADE. Don t mention it. (Stands, wrestling 
 with what is evidently a nevv idea) 
 
 ANNA. (Smiling) Yes? 
 
 MEADE. If you knew Carlyle was a crook would 
 you still be in love with him. 
 
 ANNA. What was it you said ? " I don t love you 
 because you re honest. I love vou because you re 
 you." 
 
 MEADE. I guess he s straight all right. Good 
 night. (Exit MEADE at c.) 
 
 ANNA. (Musingly, looking toward CARLYLE S 
 photo) " I guess he s straight ". (Going doivn R.) 
 He hadn t any money yesterday I know. I wonder 
 when that bill was made. (Knock at door c.) 
 Well? 
 
60 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Without) It s me Mrs. Jordan. 
 ANNA. Come in. 
 
 (Enter MRS. JORDAN. She is dressed in a kimono 
 and has her front hair in papers.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Comes down, sits L. of table) 
 I heard Mr. Meade leave and I thought I d drop 
 around to tell you something. 
 
 ANNA. I was just going to bed myself. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. You go and get in something 
 comfortable while I talk. 
 
 ANNA. I think I will. (Exit at L. ; leaves the 
 door open so that her voice may be heard) Go on. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. You remember that box? (A 
 parcel on the table catches her eye, she unwraps it) 
 
 ANNA. Mr. Graham s? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Yes. (Looking at the parcel, 
 which, upon being unwrapped, has proved to be a 
 glass jar) Is this face cream, my dear? 
 
 ANNA. In the jar? Yes. A woman at the office 
 insisted on my bringing it home. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Do you mind if I try it ? 
 
 ANNA. (The sound of her boot dropping on the 
 floor is heard) You may have it all. (MRS. JOR 
 DAN unscrews lid) I never use the stuff. I think 
 it brings wrinkles. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Thanks, dear. (During ensuing 
 conversation she is applying the cream, her face 
 shining more and more with each anointment) 
 Well, when I took up that box to Mr. Graham s 
 room, (Crosses f business) he wasn t in. (Crosses, 
 business) So I concluded to carry it to Miss Car- 
 ruth. (Pause. ANNA lets boot drop off scene) 
 
 ANNA. Yes, I hear. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I knocked at her door, but there 
 wasn t any answer. Then I opened it, and what do 
 you reckon I saw? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 61 
 
 ANNA. Miss Carruth? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. And Mr. Graham. 
 
 ANNA. (Laughs) Kissing? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Worse than that. (Explosively) 
 Shaving. 
 
 ANNA. Not both of them. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Of course, not both of them. Mr. 
 Graham. (Business) 
 
 ANNA. Dear me. How dreadful. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. He was in his shirt sleeves. " Mr. 
 Graham," says I, " I won t see such goings on in my 
 house ". 
 
 ANNA. What did he say? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. " Mrs. Jordan " says he, " If 
 you d knocked you wouldn t a had to ". I think I ll 
 ask her to leave. 
 
 ANNA. Why her? You confess it was Mister 
 Graham who was shaving. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. In her room. 
 
 ANNA. Well, shaving isn t precisely immoral, 
 you know. (Pause) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Rising to look at herself in the 
 mirror) I don t think I ll have him marry Ruth 
 now. How long ought I to keep this on? 
 
 ANNA. About fifteen minutes. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Seating herself R. of table} 
 Though, goodness knows, I d rather she d marry any 
 body sooner than Perriton Carlyle. 
 
 ANNA. Why are you so down on Perry? 
 
 (Enter ANNA. She looks exceedingly pretty in a 
 soft negligee and slippers. She is carrying her 
 cast-off clothing in a heap over her arm and 
 drops it in rocking chair L. of table.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. He s reckless and good-for-noth 
 ing. I wouldn t trust him with women either. He 
 was making up to you when yon came here ; now 
 
62 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 it s Ruth. Why, he smiled at me the other night. 
 
 ANNA. Impossible. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Yes, he did, and when I told the 
 Captain he said if it happened again, he d thrash 
 Mr. Carlyle within an inch of his life. 
 
 (Knock at door c.) 
 
 ANNA. Who s there? 
 
 GRAHAM. (Without) Miss Carruth. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Without) And Dick. (Sound 
 of kiss is heard. Evidently addressing DICK) 
 Dick, dear, don t. You don t know where that old 
 woman may be. 
 
 (MRS. JORDAN springs up.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Sotto voice) Old Woman!! 
 Me ! ! (Rises) 
 
 ANNA. Just a minute. (Covers the bundle of 
 clothes with pillows from couch) Now. 
 
 (Enter MR. and MRS. GRAHAM. They are just in 
 from the street and dressed accordingly.) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Starting zvith surprise at seeing 
 MRS. JORDAN) Oh, Gracious, I didn t know you 
 were in here. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Sniffs) No; I reckon not. 
 
 GRAHAM. What s wrong with your face. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. My face? 
 
 ANNA. He means that Cream of Youth. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Oh, is that all ? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Excitedly) Miss Gray, you 
 can t guess what has happened. 
 
 ANNA. I shouldn t try. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Well, you know when Dick 
 when Mr. Graham s uncle died he was supposed to 
 be land poor. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 63 
 
 GRAHAM. Mr. Carr, his lawyer, wrote that he d 
 left that plantation in Venezuela, but absolutely 
 nothing else. Then I made up my mind suddenly 
 that Td get the money ; that plantation would be- 
 cpme an object in life. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. He woke me up in the middle of 
 the night to tell me about it. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Shouting) He what? 
 
 ANNA. He knocked on her door in the middle 
 of the night to tell her about it. 
 
 MR. and MRS. GRAHAM. Yes; that s right. He 
 knocked on her door, etc. (GRAHAM mops face with 
 handkerchief) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Oh. 
 
 GRAHAM. The lawyer telegraphed me to-night 
 that he was on his way to Richmond and wished I 
 would meet him at the station. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. So we did. 
 
 GRAHAM. And he says he thinks he s going to 
 realize four or five thousand dollars from some min 
 ing stock of Uncle Billy s. 
 
 ANNA. What luck. 
 
 GRAHAM. He ll know by Friday, and if he s not 
 mistaken 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Dick and I will take the next 
 boat for Venezula. What do you think of that ? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Rising majestically) I think it s 
 disgraceful. I ve never had such connivings in my 
 house before, and I hope I never won t again. 
 (Goes to them) The next boat for Venezuela. 
 (Eyplosively at door.) Good-night. {Exit MRS. 
 JORDAN) 
 
 GRAHAM. (Laughing, as do they all) We ve 
 cooked our goose. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Never mind. When we hear 
 from Mr. Carr, we ll tell her the truth and resign 
 our positions. (Going to door c.) Isn t she the 
 stupid old thing not to guess? 
 
64 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 ANNA. I am sure I congratulate you both with 
 all my heart. 
 
 GRAHAM. I wish you d speak to Carlyle when 
 you see him to-morrow at the office. I wanted him 
 to sail the day after to-morrow on the San Bias, 
 and he refused. 
 
 (A clock outside strikes ten.) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Come on, Dick. It s ten o clock. 
 ANNA. That s not late. 
 
 GRAHAM. Yes it is in Washington. Good 
 night. 
 
 ANNA. Good-night and good luck. 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Good-night, Miss Gray. 
 
 (Exeunt MR. and MRS. GRAHAM. ANNA locks the 
 door after them and turns down the gas jet. 
 Then lowers the folding bed. She takes a 
 couple of gaudy sofa pillows and puts them 
 in white cases, adding them to the number* 
 on the bed. Then she tucks in the clothes 
 at the bottom and sees that they are clamped 
 tight. She goes to R. and arranges her at 
 tire for the morning, putting her shoes 
 side by side at the foot of the chair, etc. Next 
 she winds the alarm clock. She braids her hair, 
 takes her watch and kerchief from the bureau, 
 and, returning to the bed, places them beneath 
 the pillow. Gets on her knees in front of the 
 folding bed and looks under it. As she rises 
 to her feet again there is a gentle rapping at 
 the door. She stops and listens, a puzzled ex 
 pression on her face. The rapping is repeated. 
 She goes up-stage and opens the door a few 
 inches.) 
 
 ANNA. (In a loud whispr) Perry. 
 CARLYLE. (Without) Let me in a minute. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 65 
 
 ANNA. (CARLYLE enters pushing past her as 
 she tries to restrain him. He has been drinking 
 heavily, but is not quite drunk. ANNA closes the 
 door after him, but does not lock it. Both come 
 down) You shouldn t come to my room at this 
 hour. You might get me into all sorts of trouble. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Puts his hat on table) I m going 
 right away. Did I leave my wallet around here: 
 
 ANNA. No. (Sees him in the light for the first 
 time) You ve been drinking. 
 
 CARLYLE. No, I haven t. (Crosses to R. in 
 sistently) I want to know if you have seen that 
 wallet. I ve got to have it. There s a hundred dol 
 lar bill in it. 
 
 ANNA. (Suddenly suspicious) A hundred dol 
 lar bill? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Picking up the wallet from the table) 
 Here it is. I thought I left it here. (Starts to get 
 his hat. ANNA intercepts him) 
 
 ANNA. Perry, where did you get that hundred 
 dollar bill? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Puts wallet in his pocket) Don t 
 keep me now, Anna. I ve got a carriage waiting 
 for me downstairs. 
 
 ANNA. Where did you get that hundred dollar 
 bill? 
 
 CARLYLE. My salary, of course. Tuesday was 
 the fifteenth. 
 
 ANNA. And you drew fifty dollars, twenty of 
 which went to your mother. (Advances tozvard 
 him) Tell me the truth, Perry. 
 
 CARLYLE. What reason have you to believe that 
 I am not telling the truth. 
 
 ANNA. I know you re not. I know that money 
 couldn t have come from your salary, and I almost 
 know where it did come from. (Impressively) 
 You remembered what you heard Mr. Meade say 
 about putting bills together. 
 
66 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 CARLYLE. (Exasperated) Now, look here, Anna, 
 You re going too far. Being a friend doesn t give 
 you the right to 
 
 ANNA. I don t want you to make a fool of your 
 self. Did you take that money out of the treasury? 
 
 CARLYLE. No, I didn t. 
 
 ANNA. Then where did you get it? 
 
 CARLYLE. I don t choose to tell you. Now will 
 you let me go? 
 
 ANNA. Yes. (He goes to table and is about to 
 take his hat when her speech stops him) Only 
 you d better not spend that bill. It s marked. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Takes wallet from pocket) Who 
 told you that? 
 
 ANNA. Oh, so you did take it from the treasury. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Examining both sides of the bill) 
 It s not marked. 
 
 ANNA. You don t suppose the Secret Service 
 would mark a bill so that you could recognize it a 
 block away. I tell you if you spend that money 
 you re gone. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Alarmed) The Secret Service ! (In 
 specting the note again) Who told you it was 
 marked ? 
 
 ANNA. I can t give you his name. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Loudly) It was Meade. That s how 
 he knew so much about the twenty. He s in the 
 Secret Service. 
 
 ANNA. Sch! Mrs. Jordan will hear you. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Puts wallet back in his pocket. Starts 
 up-stage) Well, I can t help it. I ve got to have the 
 money. 
 
 ANNA. You don t mean to say that you are going 
 to spend it? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Kindly) Don t be silly, Anna. Til 
 put it back the first 
 
 ANNA. This isn t a question of right and wrong 
 alone. It s a question of being caught. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 67 
 
 CARLYLE. Well, I ve got to take the chance. 
 
 ANNA. You haven t any chance. If you need 
 money so desperately why didn t you hold back your 
 mother s allowance a few days and make it up to 
 her on the first? 
 
 CARLYLE. I thought of that, but I couldn t do it. 
 She needed money too. I can t let my mother suffer 
 for my mistakes. 
 
 ANNA. But now surely you can wait. Wait 
 til to-morrow, Perry, and you ll think better of this 
 thing. You re not yourself to-night. Wait til to 
 morrow and I ll get the money for you. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Going down for his hat) No. Can t 
 you see I m between two fires? If there s going to 
 be any trouble I m in for it anyway. 
 
 ANNA. (Taking the hat and holding it away 
 from him) Nonsense. Wait a few hours and turn 
 it over in your mind. You re not used to liquor, 
 Perry, and it makes you do mad things. If it 
 weren t for that you would never have taken that 
 money. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Growing angry) Give me that hat. 
 I ve got to go, I tell you. 
 
 ANNA. You shan t go with my consent. (Throws 
 the hat in room at L. and tries to close the door on it. 
 CARLYLE, without actually touching her, pulls the 
 door open and rushes in after the hat) 
 
 CARLYLE. Hold on ! (ANNA bangs the door and 
 locks him in, leaning against it, in utter exhaus 
 tion. CARLYLE throws himself against the other 
 side) Here, let me out ! 
 
 ANNA. Not until you give your word not to 
 spend that money. 
 
 CARLYLE. I ll break the door. 
 
 ANNA. No, you won t. 
 
 CARLYLE. Why won t I? 
 
 ANNA. Because that disturbance wcuM corn- 
 promise me. 
 
68 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 CARLYLE. Well, let me out. 
 
 ANNA. I will, if you ll only promise to keep the 
 bill until to-morrow. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Getting very angry) I ll promise 
 nothing. You ve no right to detain me this way. 
 
 ANNA. I m doing it for your sake. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Furiously) If you don t let me out 
 I ll believe you re doing it for your own because 
 you are jealous of Ruth. 
 
 ANNA. Perry. 
 
 CARLYLE. I ll believe you want to queer me with 
 her. You ve always been jealous of her. You ve 
 always been in love with me. 
 
 ANNA. That s a lie. I never loved you. (There 
 is a loud knock at door c.) Sch. 
 
 CARLYLE. I didn t go to say that Anna, I 
 
 ANNA. Sch. (There is another knock. ANNA 
 speaks in a low frightened tone) That s Mrs. 
 Jordan. 
 
 CARLYLE. (In the same tone) Better let me out. 
 
 (Another peremptory knock.) 
 
 ANNA. No, keep quiet. (To the person outside) 
 Yes, what is it? 
 
 RUTH. -(Without) It s Ruth Jordan. Let me in. 
 
 ANNA. Come in. (Enter RUTH wearing hat 
 and coat. She is obviously angry) What do you 
 want? 
 
 RUTH. Where is Perry Carlyle? 
 
 ANNA. Perry? Why I thought he was at the 
 theater with you. 
 
 RUTH. Five minutes ago he was in this room 
 with you. He left me in the carriage while he 
 came up here to look for his wallet. What have 
 you done with him? 
 
 ANNA. What have / done with him? That s 
 funny. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 69 
 
 RUTH. Isn t Mr. Meade enough for you? Do 
 you want every man in" the house? What do you 
 suppose Mamma will say when she hears of you 
 hiding Mr. Carlyle in your room at this hour? 
 
 ANNA. I tell you he isn t here. He he left 
 some time ago. 
 
 RUTH. (Looking about) Perry! Perry! 
 
 ANNA. He isn t here. 
 
 RUTH. (Going to closet dodr) Don t tell lies, 
 Anna. (Tries door) Why is this door locked? 
 Open it. 
 
 ANNA. I won t. 
 
 RUTH. Why not ? 
 
 ANNA. Because this is my room and I do what 
 I please in it. Please go at once. 
 
 RUTH. And leave him to you? I guess not. 
 Perry (Rattling door violently) Perry, answer 
 me. 
 
 ANNA. You ll wake everybody in the house. 
 
 RUTH. Then open the door. Perry! Perry! 
 
 ANNA. (In desperation) Open it yourself. 
 The key s in the lock, if you weren t too excited 
 to see it. (She runs to door c., locks that and comes 
 down holding the key) 
 
 RUTH. (Throwing open closet door) Perry! 
 (He enters) Now, perhaps you can explain this. 
 
 CARLYLE. I can explain it. 
 
 RUTH. I don t care for any explanation from 
 you. The best thing you can do is to leave this room 
 with me. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Firmly) You must listen first. I ve 
 been drinking you know it. Miss Gray had to lock 
 me up to keep me from disturbing everybody in the 
 house. 
 
 RUTH. That s a likely story. Will you come? 
 (She tries door c. finds it locked, sees the key in 
 ANNA S hand snatches it, and starts for door) 
 
 ANNA. Ruth, you don t understand. Don t un- 
 
70 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 lock that door. He s a ruined man if he passes 
 it. 
 
 RUTH. Which means that he will lose you, I 
 suppose. 
 
 ANNA. (Her heart breaking) No, no, no. I 
 don t want him. I don t care for him. Oh, believe 
 me, I don t. I love Sam Meade 
 
 CARLYLE. I ll go. 
 
 RUTH, (to ANNA) Then don t interfere. 
 
 ANNA. (All this simultaneously) I resign Perry 
 to you. I ll promise never, never to see him again. 
 Only don t open that door until he s made me the 
 promise I want from him. If you do, you send him 
 to prison. 
 
 RUTH. A promise. A trick to steal my sweet 
 heart. (To PERRY) Will you come? 
 
 CARLYLE. Yes. (Goes to door) 
 
 ANNA. I ll never see him again if you ll only 
 wait. Open that door and I will take him from you. 
 I ll know that you care nothing for his welfare and 
 I ll do everything in God s world to keep him from 
 you. Ruth ! Ruth ! 
 
 RUTH. (Throws open door) Go on, Perry. 
 Quick, she ll waken Mamma. 
 
 ANNA. (Throwing herself on CARLYLE) Perry, 
 for God s sake don t spend that money. 
 
 CARLYLE. I must. (Exit) 
 
 ANNA. You ve sent him to his ruin to the devil. 
 Now it s a battle between us for the man I love 
 and ^you don t. You shan t have him now. You 
 shan t. I ll do anything in the world to prevent it. 
 
 RUTH. You will ! You ll have to act quick then. 
 The carriage is waiting to take us to the B. & O. 
 station. We re going to Baltimore to be married. 
 You ve mixed in my affairs for the last time. In 
 two hours I ll be the wife of Perrv Carlvle 
 (Exits) 
 
 ANNA. (Stunned for an instant. Recovers her- 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 71 
 
 self. Runs to door c., flings it open and screams 
 over the balustrade) Mrs. Jordan! Mrs. Jordan! 
 Come quick ! Ruth s run away with Perry Carlyle ! 
 
 Quick curtain 
 
 (First call General hubbub. Voices from below. 
 MRS. JORDAN calling "Henry", etc.) 
 
72 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 ACT III 
 
 SCENE: A room in the Redemption Agency at the 
 Treasury Department. The setting, which 
 should be reproduced from a photograph, in its 
 essentials is as follows: The flat represents a 
 high, white-washed wall, in which there are 
 three lofty windows. Through these windows 
 are seen the familiar pillars of the building, 
 and, beyond them, the corner of Fifteenth and 
 F Streets. At L. 2 E., a grated door, which is 
 locked and unlocked by one man whenever any 
 body is given admission or egress. At R. I E. 
 a door leading to another room. The furniture 
 consists principally of chairs and desks, five 
 of these latter, in a straight line from right to 
 left, belonging to Miss WADLEIGH, ANNA, 
 CARLYLE, RUTH and UPTON. Pictures on the 
 wall represent GEORGE WASHINGTON, ABRAHAM 
 LINCOLN, etc. The day is that following the 
 one which the preceding act transpired, and a 
 large clock on the flat indicates that the hour is 
 
 AT RISE : The Clerks are discovered at work. Each 
 has at her side a bundle of bills, from which she 
 counts a hundred. This bundle of one hundred 
 is done up in a narrow strip of paper, which 
 the clerk initials. She also makes an entry on 
 an invoice sheet at her side. After a few 
 minutes of pantomime a gong rings. One by 
 one the clerks rise, go to a teller at a larger desk 
 or behind a window, and turn over bundles to 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 73 
 
 him. This official signs for each bundle. TJiis 
 done, the gong rings again. There is immediate 
 confusion, everyone making preparations for 
 luncheon. Miss WADLEIGH, an excessively 
 stout and unprepossessing woman of fifty-five, 
 spreads a neivspapcr over her desk to serve as 
 a table cover. MR. UPTON, extremely short, 
 extremely thin, and extremely effeminate, gives 
 her his fussy assistance. RUTH joins them 
 quickly, and CARLYLE with more hesitation. 
 ANNA starts to leave the room. CARLYLE goes 
 to her. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Almost in a whisper) Did you get 
 the bill ? You can tell me now. 
 
 ANNA. (In the same tone) Ssch! When I come 
 back. 
 
 (CARLYLE strolls to the group at R.) 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. (To ANNA) Won t you have 
 some lunch with us, Miss Gray? 
 
 ANNA. Thank you. After a while, perhaps. I 
 want to use the telephone first. (Exits L.) 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. Miss Gray s been looking bad 
 all day. I suppose she s worried about this money 
 business. 
 
 UPTON. You can t blame her. I won t feel safe 
 myself until the thief s found. 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. Will you get the teapot, please ? 
 It s in the cloak room. (UPTON exits R., returning 
 at once with pot and alcohol lamp) They say it s 
 the second time this year. 
 
 CARLYLE. Who says? 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. Mr. Moore. He tells me every 
 thing that happens in this division. 
 
 RUTH. Oh, Miss Wadleigh! Is the Chief in 
 your toils, too? 
 
74 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. (Taking up a piece of pie) 
 Now, Ruth, you mustn t talk that way. (UPTON 
 grabs playfully at the pie. Miss WADLEIGH co- 
 quettishly slaps his hand) 
 
 UPTON. Is that mine? 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. Naughty! 
 
 UPTON. Cruel ! (Seriously) I never was so 
 surprised in my life as when I got down this morn 
 ing and found these desks locked. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Rattling the top of the desk next 
 him) Are they all locked? 
 
 UPTON. Every one. They ll be searched after 
 we go. (To Miss WADLEIGH) That tea s steeped 
 enough. 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. Hardly. 
 
 UPTON. Oh, pardon me. I can tell from the 
 smell. (Miss WADLEIGH pours a cup full) See. 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. (Puts sugar in the cup) 
 There ! Two lumps. 
 
 UPTON. Oh, scissors ! I only take one ! (Fishes 
 one lump out and sips the beverage delicately) 
 
 (Business of Miss WADLEIGH pouring tea for the 
 others.) 
 
 RUTH. They may have been through the desks 
 already. 
 
 UPTON. I guess not. They will go through them, 
 though. That s how the woman was caught last 
 June. Just a few little scraps of bill in her desk. 
 
 CARLYLE. I shouldn t think they d expect to get 
 two fish with the same bait. The man the woman 
 who did this must have taken warning. 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. (Leaning forward con 
 fidentially) I ll tell you something, but you mustn t 
 repeat it to a soul. They re watching Miss Gray. 
 
 CARLYLE. Watching Anna! Nonsense! 
 
 RUTH. (At the same moment) How do you 
 know? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 75 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. Some of the most suspicious 
 looking bills were in her bundles. 
 
 CARLYLE. That doesn t mean anything. 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. It means a good deal to a man 
 as sharp as Mr. Meade ! 
 
 RUTH. Meade! Huh! If the thing s in his 
 hands he ll take care that Miss Gray doesn t get 
 into trouble. He s in love with her ! 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. Why, Ruth Jordan! You 
 know that Sam Meade s in love with me ! 
 
 CARLYLE. Miss Gray won t need anybody s pro 
 tection. She s innocent of any wrong-doing. She 
 may not even have seen the notes you re talking 
 about. 
 
 Miss WADLEIGH. Well, she may not. 
 
 CARLYLE. She did not. I ll stake my life on 
 Anna Gray. 
 
 UPTON. She might as well have the game as the 
 name. If they fasten the theft on her she ll go to 
 prison, whoever the real thief is. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Impulsively) If they fasten the theft 
 on her the real thief will confess ! (He observes 
 that the others are looking on him in amazement) 
 Surely even a thief would be man enough for that ! 
 
 (Enter BOB, L., carrying a paper sack. The door 
 keeper admits him L.) 
 
 RUTH. (Leaving the party and going to join 
 BOB at L.) Hello, Bob! W r hat are you after? 
 
 BOB. After Miss Gray. Got her lunch. 
 
 RUTH. Didn t she bring it? 
 
 BOB. Nope. Said she wouldn t have time to 
 eat. 
 
 RUTH. (Suspiciously) Oh! 
 
 BOB. So your mother sent me with it. She said 
 after what happened last night 
 
 RUTH. (Stuffs the remainder of her pie in his 
 
76 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 mouth, thus effectually choking his utterance. 
 Looks around to see if he has been overheard. Miss 
 WADLEIGH is just disappearing into the room R., fol 
 lowed by CARLYLE and UPTON, bearing the soiled 
 dishes. The groups up-stag e have sauntered off) 
 Here s Miss Gray now. 
 
 (ANNA enters L. BOB goes to her and endeavors to 
 speak, holding out her lunch.) 
 
 ANNA. Why, Bob! What s the matter with 
 you? 
 
 BOB. Pie! (Masticates hastily) Here s your 
 lunch. 
 
 ANNA. I don t want a bite. You may eat it. 
 
 BOB. I can? 
 
 ANNA. (Goes to her desk sits) Well, I said 
 " you may " , but I guess you can, too. 
 
 BOB. Oh, thank you ! That s the third lunch I ve 
 had to-day! (Exits) 
 
 RUTH. (With intense feeling) You left home 
 this morning early and got to the office late. Where 
 did you go from the house? 
 
 ANNA. Out. 
 
 RUTH. (Sniffing) I suppose you wouldn t care 
 to say to what place ? 
 
 ANNA. Your supposition is correct. 
 
 RUTH. I don t doubt you ve been mixing in 
 Perry s affairs again. 
 
 ANNA. If I have that s Perry s affair. 
 
 RUTH. Well, I just want to let you understand, 
 that it s no use. Papa made us miss the last train 
 to Baltimore, but I m more than seven and if I want 
 to marry Perry Carlyle I m going to. 
 
 ANNA. Perhaps you d better tell him about that. 
 It really doesn t interest me. (She crosses to her 
 desk, picks up a pair of gloves lying there, opens 
 the desk and drops them inside) 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 77 
 
 RUTH. I only wish it didn t interest (Stops 
 short upon seeing what ANNA has done) Isn t your 
 desk locked? 
 
 ANNA. Certainly not. Why? 
 
 RUTH. Haven t you heard? Everyone else s is. 
 They re to be searched after a while. 
 
 ANNA. Oh ! 
 
 RUTH. I wonder why they didn t lock yours. 
 
 ANNA. They probably thought they had. Some 
 times the key turns without locking the desk. 
 
 RUTH. Oh! I thought maybe Mr. Meade was 
 showing his partiality for you! 
 
 ANNA. Of course, you d think that. 
 
 RUTH. So would anybody else in the office. 
 Everyone knows about you and Mr. Meade. 
 
 ANNA. Don t be silly, Ruth. (She occupies her 
 self at the desk. Enter CARLYLE from R.) 
 
 RUTH. (To CARLYLE) You didn t wait for me. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Curtly) No. Miss Wadleigh asked 
 for you. She wants you to help her with the cups. 
 
 RUTH. Bother ! I don t want to work. I should 
 think she d be satisfied with Mr. Upton. He s old 
 woman enough, goodness knows. (Exit R. in cloak 
 room) 
 
 CARLYLE. (His manner changes to one of alert 
 ness. He glances about to make sure that they are 
 alone. Goes to ANNA) Did you get it? 
 
 ANNA. No. The ticket agent you mentioned 
 wasn t on duty. He hasn t come back yet. I tele 
 phoned a moment ago. (Rises and goes L. with 
 him) It was the B. & O. you re sure"? 
 
 CARLYLE. Of course, I m sure. The ticket 
 agent s a chap named Jones. Graham introduced 
 him to me once that s why he was willing to take 
 the bill. It must have been in that office. 
 
 ANNA. It wasn t in the drawer or in the safe. 
 
 CARLYLE. ^Ten to one it s here now. I m gone! 
 
 ANNA. Why did you use it? 
 
;3 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 CARLYLE. Why did I take it? Why have I done 
 any one of the dozen foolish things I ve done in 
 the past six months? Last night I d been drinking 
 too much to think clearly. My only desire was 
 to get away before Jordan came. I had to pay the 
 cabman and get tickets to Baltimore and I had to do 
 it quick. 
 
 ANNA. (Gives him money) Here s the fifty 
 dollars you borrowed from Mr. Graham this morn 
 ing. 
 
 CARLYLE. And your fifty? (She shows it to 
 him) You can pay your brother s tuition now, as 
 you expected. I m almost glad you couldn t get the 
 bill back. 
 
 ANNA. But you? 
 
 CARLYLE. Oh, well, I ve learned a lesson. I ll 
 have to pay for my tuition, too. 
 
 (RUTH enters. Seeing that CARLYLE and ANNA are 
 talking earnestly she remains still.) 
 
 ANNA. Don t say that. We haven t lost yet, 
 and (Questioningly) if we do pull through 
 
 CARLYLE. I ll never take anything that doesn t 
 belong to me again. Never ! As God is my judge ! 
 
 (The light of comprehension shows in RUTH S face. 
 She steps noiselessly into the doorway behind 
 her.) 
 
 ANNA. I believe you! (She starts to return to 
 her desk. CARLYLE draws her back) 
 
 CARLYLE. Do you know what hurts as bad as any 
 thing else? 
 
 ANNA. What? 
 
 CARLYLE. The recollection of what I said to you 
 last night. 
 
 ANNA. (Brokenly) Don t don t speak of it. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 79 
 
 CARLYLE. I ve been a fool all along. My worst 
 folly has been not appreciating you. If it weren t 
 too late 
 
 ANNA. Is it ever too late to mend? 
 
 CARLYLE. I hope not. I didn t mean that. But 
 I I ve given my word to Ruth and you are plighted 
 to Sam Meade. 
 
 ANNA. Ah, you mustn t 
 
 CARLYLE. Once I spoke of you as the little gray 
 lady. You re not that, Anna. I ll tell you what you 
 are. The little gold lady. (He takes her hand and 
 kisses it) The little gold lady. 
 
 RUTH. (Stepping forth and making herself 
 heard) I hope I don t intrude. 
 
 ANNA. Certainly not. 
 
 RUTH. I m glad, for I intend to stay. Anna, I 
 want to ask you a question. 
 
 ANNA. Yes. 
 
 RUTH. Just one, and I ask it of you, because I 
 want the truth. What did Perry mean just now 
 when he swore to you that he d never take anything 
 that didn t belong to him again ? 
 
 CARLYLE. Ruth, that isn t 
 
 RUTH. What did he mean? I insist on knowing. 
 Did he mean that it was he who took the money 
 that disappeared yesterday? 
 
 ANNA. You have no right to ask that question. 
 
 RUTH. I have all the right in the world. I 
 
 CARLYLE. I ll answer your question, Ruth. I did 
 mean that. 
 
 (There is a dead silence.) 
 
 ANNA. (Rises) Perhaps / intrude now. (There 
 is no reply. She zvalks to the door; then returns 
 to RUTH R. does not speak till she reaches RUTH S 
 side) We all make mistakes, Ruth. We all 
 (Chilled at their silence she turns to door R.) I ll 
 
8o THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 leave you alone to talk things over. (Exits in cloak 
 room) 
 
 RUTH. (Advances a step) So you re a thief! 
 
 CARLYLE. Ruth ! 
 
 RUTH. A thief ! But for papa I d have been the 
 wife of a thief ! 
 
 CARLYLE. I intended to return the money. On 
 my honor, I did ! 
 
 RUTH. Your honor! That s good! 
 
 CARLYLE. Ruth ! Don t be so hard on me ! 
 
 RUTH. Hard on you! It doesn t occur to you to 
 think of me ! 
 
 CARLYLE. Of you? 
 
 RUTH. Yes, of me! Can t you see that you 
 dragged me into the mire with you? I was your 
 sweetheart. Every tattler in town will link my name 
 with yours. 
 
 CARLYLE. Nonsense ! 
 
 RUTH. It s not nonsense ! You know Washing 
 ton a big village ! How much reputation will I 
 have left when the newspapers get through with me ? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Bitterly) Not one thought of me ? 
 
 RUTH. You re not in any trouble yet and you 
 mustn t be. Does anyone suspect you? 
 
 CARLYLE. I don t know. The bill was marked 
 somehow and I spent it. I m afraid it can be traced 
 back to me. 
 
 RUTH. Thank heaven, it isn t as bad as it might 
 be. We re not married. 
 
 CARLYLE. Then you don t love me? 
 
 RUTH. Love you? Love a thief? Are you 
 crazy ? 
 
 CARLYLE. No. I have been. 
 
 RUTH. (Goes to him) Listen to me 
 
 CARLYLE. You listen to me ! I have been crazy ! 
 I trusted you! I loved you. I spent my last 
 dollar for you and when more was needed I stole 
 for you ! 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY Si 
 
 RUTH. That s right! Accuse me! 
 
 CARLYLE. I don t accuse you. I only blame my 
 self. I blame myself for having been so blind that 
 it took a thing like this to open my eyes. 
 
 RUTH. The Lord knows my eyes are opened. 
 
 CARLYLE. You needn t worry. I m sane enough 
 now to be glad of my liberty as you will be of 
 yours. I m sane enough to thank you with all my 
 heart for my freedom. Your name won t be men 
 tioned in this affair. Your skirts are clean and 
 your road is clear. It lies through that door. 
 You re done with me and I m done \vith you. 
 
 RUTH. That s easily said. I ve got to get you 
 out of this or fall with you. 
 
 CARLYLE. You can t get me out ! (Plunges his 
 hands in his coat pockets) God! (Brings out 
 pieces of bill) Now I am done for ! 
 
 RUTH. What are those? 
 
 CARLYLE. Pieces of bills I took away. If they 
 find these on me 
 
 RUTH. On you ! Why should they be found on 
 you? Why not hide them? Here! (She takes the 
 bits of paper from him) 
 
 CARLYLE. Your skirts are clean. You d better go. 
 
 RUTH. W r e must get rid of them, but where 
 where? (Enter MEADE at L. RUTH hastily closes 
 her hands on the bills) Look out! 
 
 MEADE. Mr. Carlyle, you re wanted upstairs. 
 
 CARLYLE. Wanted ! 
 
 RUTH. (Simultaneously) Upstairs! 
 
 MEADE. Yes ; will you come \vith me, please ? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Pulling himself together) Oh! Of 
 course ! I I ll see you later, Miss Jordan. 
 
 (Exeunt MEADE and CARLYLE. There is a burst of 
 laughter from room R. A street piano outside 
 begins playing. RUTH folloivs CARLYLE to the 
 door L. She looks after him a moment.) 
 
82 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 RUTH. Will he come back or do they know? 
 The fool ! (She returns to center. Opens her hand 
 and looks at bills. She is asking herself where to 
 put them. Her eye falls on the papers lying on 
 ANNA S desk. Their presence reminds her that the 
 desk is open. She starts toward it, then hesitates, 
 and stops. She is arguing with herself) It s the 
 only way ! I must think of myself ! (She looks 
 around quickly. Then she opens the desk, flings in 
 the bills and closes it) Locked ! (She wipes her 
 face with her palm as though to brush away, the 
 vision of what has happened. The other hand 
 clenches the desk. The street piano ceases to play) 
 Oh, my God! 
 
 (Enter ANNA R. There is heard the sound of clatter 
 and laughter as the door opens.) 
 
 ANNA. (Going to her) Ruth! What s the 
 matter? Are you ill? 
 
 RUTH. (Dissembling) Perry they sent for 
 him upstairs. 
 
 ANNA. You don t mean he s been arrested? 
 
 RUTH. I m afraid so. 
 
 ANNA. Who came for him? 
 
 RUTH. Mr. Meade. 
 
 ANNA. Then they suspect ! Could anyone have 
 overheard Perry talking to you? 
 
 RUTH. No. 
 
 ANNA. The bill must have turned up. (She has 
 been musing. Suddenly she becomes alert) We 
 must do something and do it quickly. 
 
 RUTH. What can we do? 
 
 ANNA. Just one thing: get him away. 
 
 RUTH. There s no time! It can t be done! 
 
 ANNA. It must be done. It isn t a separation I m 
 planning. When Perry s safe you can go to him. 
 
 RUTH. Go to him! Humph! I never want to 
 see his face again. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 83 
 
 ANNA. Ruth! You don t mean that? 
 
 RUTH. I mean it with all my heart. I ve told him 
 so. What did you expect of me? The man s a 
 thief. He can do what he pleases. I m through with 
 him. 
 
 ANNA. Then I was right. You never loved him ! 
 
 RUTH. I did once. 
 
 ANNA. Ah, no, no ! Love real love isn t like 
 that! 
 
 RUTH. (With intense bitterness) Meaning, I 
 suppose, that you love Perry? 
 
 ANNA. Meaning just that. 
 
 RUTH. All right. You re welcome to him. I 
 give him back to you. Take him and save him. 
 (Enter CARLYLE. RUTH exits R.) 
 
 ANNA. Perry! Do they know? Quick ; tell me, 
 are you still free? 
 
 CARLYLE. Yes, the Lord knows for how long. 
 
 ANNA. Who questioned you? 
 
 CARLYLE. Meade. He s got a package of bills or 
 something by which to tell the stolen note when he 
 gets it. I may be arrested any minute. 
 
 ANNA. No ! No ! I ve a plan. 
 
 CARLYLE. It s useless, Anna. You can t help 
 me. You d better give up trying. 
 
 ANNA. I won t give up and you shan t either. 
 We can t keep the truth to ourselves much longer. 
 If you re here when that bill turns up you ll be 
 arrested. You must get out of town and at once. 
 
 CARLYLE. They d telegraph after me. 
 
 ANNA. You must get out of the country. When 
 does the next boat sail for Venezuela? 
 
 CARLYLE. (More hopefully) To-morrow morn 
 ing. 
 
 ANNA. To-morrow? You re sure? 
 
 CARLYLE. Graham told me so yesterday. 
 
 ANNA. Luck s with us. You have fifty dollars 
 in your pocket. Don t stop to pack your things. 
 
84 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 Don t go near your house. There must be a train 
 to New York within an hour. Take it and to 
 morrow you ll be safe. 
 
 CARLYLE. And Graham? 
 
 ANNA. At the Pension Office. Get him on your 
 way to the station. Tell him you ve decided to 
 accept his offer. Don t let anyone stop you. There s 
 no time to think about it. Go ! Go ! 
 
 CARLYLE. I will. (Goes to door) 
 
 ANNA. Hurry ! 
 
 CARLYLE. (Stops short and turns around) Wait ! 
 What about you? 
 
 ANNA. About me? What do you mean? 
 
 CARLYLE. They ll find you got me away. What 
 will happen to you ? 
 
 ANNA. That doesn t matter to me. 
 
 CARLYLE. It matters to me. If my trouble is to 
 fall on your shoulders I won t go. 
 
 ANNA. Not to save yourself from prison? 
 
 CARLYLE. Not to save myself from Hell ! 
 
 ANNA. (Exultantly) I knew you were that 
 sort. I ll be all right. When you re beyond reach, 
 I ll find some way of explaining things. (The door 
 at L. opens. MEADE looks in and closes it again. 
 ANNA frozen zvith horror) Do you see? You re 
 practically a prisoner now. If you re to get away 
 you must hurry. 
 
 CARLYLE. I can t do it. (Sits) 
 
 ANNA. (Trying to get him to his feet) I tell 
 you I ll clear myself. This is your opportunity to 
 get a fresh start. You ve got to take it. 
 
 CARLYLE. What s the use? My behavior has 
 already cost me everything I care for. While I was 
 fancying myself in love with Ruth I lost you. Now 
 she releases me and you are promised to Meade. 
 
 ANNA. No ! No ! I m not. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Starting up) But you said last 
 night 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 85 
 
 ANNA. What I said was said to induce Ruth to 
 keep you in that room. Love doesn t shift and 
 turn, Perry, even though we sometimes think it does. 
 You and I were boy and girl playmates. I ve always 
 trusted and believed in you. Perry, what you said 
 through the closet door was true I love you ! 
 
 CARLYLE. (Takes her hand) God bless you! I 
 love you, too, and I can t leave you where there s a 
 chance of trouble for you. 
 
 ANNA. Ail the trouble there is for me, you re 
 making. Can t you understand that by staying you 
 only make me wretched ! Your trouble is my 
 trouble now. If you were sent to prison, it would 
 break my heart. If you care anything for me, you ll 
 take this chance to show me that you can be big and 
 fine and square. Will you do that ? Will you go ? 
 
 CARLYLE. Yes. I ll go for your sake and prove 
 myself a man! (Kisses her hand and makes quick 
 exit at R.) 
 
 (ANNA conies down stage wearily and sinks in chair 
 c. zt ith head on hands.) 
 
 MEADE. (Enter at back. He looks at ANNA, then 
 goes to door R. and glances off to satisfy himself 
 that CARLYLE is there. Comes down-stage fingering 
 a bunch of keys) You look worn out. 
 
 ANNA. I am very tired. I shan t stay this 
 afternoon. 
 
 MEADE. I wouldn t if I was you. (Turns up 
 stage, keeping his eye on CARLYLE. ANNA, obviously 
 nervous, speaks with the purpose of attracting his 
 attention) 
 
 ANNA. Oh, Mr. Meade. 
 
 MEADE. (Turning dozvn) Yes? 
 
 ANNA. How how is your case going? 
 
 MEADE. (Sits) I could put my hand on the man 
 that made that bill. 
 
86 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 ANNA. Have you arrested him? 
 
 MEADE. No ; but I will though, before the lunch 
 hour is over. 
 
 ANNA. You re as sure as that? 
 
 MEADE. Dead sure. (Takes roll of bills from 
 his pocket) Here is the evidence that s going to put 
 one thief in the penitentiary. 
 
 ANNA. Those bills? 
 
 MEADE. That s it. Through them I m going to 
 identify that hundred dollar note when it comes in. 
 (Returns roll to pocket) 
 
 ANNA. Through those ! Do you mean to say 
 that if it weren t for those bills you couldn t identify 
 the note? If you lost them, you d lose your man? " 
 
 MEADE. I d have to begin on a new track. It 
 would take me a week or so to get started again. 
 
 ANNA. (Holding out her hand) Let me see 
 those remarkable bills. 
 
 MEADE. (Shows them to her without letting 
 them go out of his hands) Just ordinary mutilated 
 money. 
 
 ANNA. Let me look at it. 
 
 MEADE. (Withdrawing bills from her grasp and 
 returning same to pocket) It s just like any other 
 torn money. 
 
 ANNA. (With a movement of vexation} Then, 
 how will it enable you to identifv that hundred dol 
 lars? 
 
 MEADE. By a mark that corresponds with one 
 on the yellow back. 
 
 ANNA. What is the mark? 
 
 MEADE. I can t tell you. 
 
 ANNA. Not even me? 
 
 MEADE. Not even you. 
 
 ANNA. Yet you say you re fond of me. 
 
 MEADE. Love ain t business. (Rises facing 
 front) 
 
 at the Treasury. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 87 
 
 (CARLYLE enters door R. and exits door c. ANNA 
 in agony that MEADE will see him, shows her 
 fear.) 
 
 ANNA. Love is trust. You don t trust me. 
 
 MEADE. Why, yes, I do. Here (Takes up 
 piece of paper from desk) See this? 
 
 ANNA. Yes. 
 
 MEADE. I tear this piece out of it. Now we might 
 have a thousand other bits of paper, but that would 
 always be the only piece that would fit. No two 
 tears are ever alike. 
 
 ANNA. I understand. 
 
 MEADE. When the extra hundred comes in as 
 it s sure to do I take it to pieces. If the parts fit, 
 the bill is identified. See? 
 
 ANNA. Then just that little roll of money is the 
 key that will lock some man in prison ? 
 
 MEADE. That s it! Pretty good scheme, eh? 
 
 ANNA. It seems to me that your chain of evidence 
 is slight. 
 
 MEADE. Slight for a jury, maybe. It ll put us 
 next, though, and when I m sure of my man, I ll 
 find ways enough to make the jury sure. 
 
 ANNA. So long as you have these notes, he can t 
 escape you? 
 
 MEADE. Not if he s still alive and in America! 
 Escape ! Huh ! I ll have the maker of that hundred 
 dollar bill inside of twenty-four hours ! (ANNA 
 snatches the bills from his hand and begins tearing 
 them to bits. He seizes her arm. There is almost 
 a struggle) Here, what are you doing? 
 
 ANNA. I can t let you catch that man. 
 
 MEADE. But you ve done for me. You ruined 
 me. No, by God ! You ve given the thief into my 
 hands. I suspected him before; I m sure of him 
 now ! The only man you d do that for is the man 
 you love and that man is Perriton Carlyle. I said 
 
88 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 I d have him in twenty-four hours ; I ll have him in 
 twenty- four minutes, and you gave him to me. (He 
 starts to go up tozvard c. door; ANNA clings to his 
 arm violently) 
 
 ANNA. I ! Oh, no, no, no. You re wrong. 
 (With an inspiration) You re wrong. I tore those 
 bills to save myself ! I 
 
 MEADE. Do you think I m a fool? 
 
 ANNA. I tore those bills to save myself, but I 
 can t do it at his expense. Oh, wait! Wait a 
 moment ! Let me explain to you. You re going to 
 make an awful mistake ! You re going to arrest an 
 innocent man. 
 
 MEADE. I ll take my chances on that. Let go of 
 me. 
 
 (In the struggle they have struck violently against 
 the desk. The drawer is so arranged that the 
 Mow opens it a little. ANNA sees the 
 pieces of bill inside; MEADE also sees them 
 both gaze at them a breathless pause. Then 
 ANNA grabs up the bits of money with an 
 inspiration.) 
 
 ANNA. Wait ! Here are your proofs ! Look 
 here ! Pieces of money in my desk. Now, are you 
 convinced? Now, will you believe that I m the 
 thief you re after? 
 
 MEADE. (Violently) No! No! 
 
 ANNA. You ve got to believe it. Here are the 
 pieces and here I am confessing myself to be a thief ! 
 (The gong rings loudly.) The lunch hour is over! 
 The people are coming back. If you take another 
 step after an innocent man, I ll tell them all what 
 I ve told you. I ll tell them that you re making 
 Perry Carlyle a cloak to shield me because you love 
 me ! You know they ll believe me ! You know your 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 89 
 
 own chief will believe me ! They re coming ! You 
 haven t a minute to make up your mind ! I say I m 
 the thief! You ve got to believe me! You ve got 
 to ! You ve got to ! You ve got to ! (Pounding 
 desk with hands hysterically) 
 
 Quick curtain 
 
90 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 ACT IV 
 
 SCENE: The same as ACT I. It is October, how 
 ever, and the trees, instead of being covered 
 with leaves, are nearly bare. The passage of 
 the months that have intervened since first the 
 " back yard " was disclosed is evident in number 
 less details. The hour is shortly after 9 A. M. 
 
 DISCOVERED: MRS. GRAHAM is discovered lying in 
 the hammock. From across the fence drift the 
 familiar tones of the flute, playing " I d Leave 
 My Happy Home For You ". After a moment, 
 MRS. JORDAN enters L. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (On porch) Listening to the 
 music ? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Assuming a sitting posture) 
 I wonder to which of us he intends to convey that 
 information. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Information? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. That he d leave his happy home. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Oh! (Sits on steps and shells 
 peas) Seems nice not to have to go to work, don t 
 it? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Very. I wish a politician died 
 every day. 
 
 (The flute solo ceases.) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I reckon everybody here needs the 
 rest. Miss Gray s got a bad headache and Ruth 
 came home about sick last night. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. It s warm weather for October. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I don t think the weather s got 
 anything to do with it. I believe there s been trouble 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 91 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Trouble? What kind of trouble? 
 MRS. JORDAN. I don t know. Only (MRS. 
 GRAHAM joins her) Mr. Carlyle s gone to Ven 
 ezuela. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Yes. To manage Mr. Graham s 
 plantation. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. So Mr. Graham says. But it s 
 mighty sudden. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Why, no, it isn t! Mr. Graham s 
 been urging him for months. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. He went without a word to any 
 body. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Did you expect him to say good 
 bye to you after that scene the night before last at 
 the depot? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Well, Ruth says she s through with 
 him, and that s a blessing! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. He certainly was good to Ruth. 
 MRS. JORDAN. Yes. He was liberal enough. 
 Only last Friday he gave her a beautiful picture of 
 a naked lady standing on the moon. (MRS. GRAHAM 
 laugJis. MRS. JORDAN calls) Bob! Oh, Bob! 
 (To MRS. GRAHAM) It was sent to be framed. 
 MRS. GRAHAM. I think I know the picture. 
 MRS. JORDAN. Of course, the lady s vulgar, but 
 the moon is lovely! (Rises and goes to c. Calls) 
 Bob! 
 
 (Enter BOB, his head appearing atop the fence) 
 
 BOB. Yes m. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Bob, will you go down to Veerhof s 
 and get a picture that s there for Miss Jordan. 
 
 BOB. Yes m. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. That s a good boy. 
 
 BOB. Yes m. (Exit) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Returning to the hammock) 
 Why should Ruth be through with Mr. Carlyle? 
 
92 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Returning to the peas) It s my 
 opinion that the man had her hypnotized. When 
 he went away she came to her senses again. Say, 
 Miss Carruth. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Yes. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. When you get to Venezuela, why 
 don t you marry Mr. Carlyle? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Why don t I marry Mr. Carlyle? 
 Because (Laughs) Haven t you given up that 
 idea yet ? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. No, indeed. I think he d be an 
 elegant match for you. Then Ruth and Mr. 
 Graham 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Ruth and Mr. Graham! Dick 
 get married to Ruth? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I didn t believe there was any 
 thing really serious between you and Mr. Graham 
 and so and so 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. And so? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Well, I thought you might use 
 your influence with Mr. Graham. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (With emphasis) Use my in 
 fluence to make Mr. Graham marry Ruth? That s 
 too funny ! (Laughs sarcastically) 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Gathering the peas in her pan) 
 You needn t laugh. Mr. Graham s been paying her 
 a great deal of attention recently. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Stops laughing and rises 
 angrily) What? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. (Walks up steps) Yes. You 
 ought to a-seen them together last night. (Enter 
 GRAHAM at L., jauntily) Here he is now. 
 
 GRAHAM. Hello! You all look happy. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. We are. Mrs. Jordan s been 
 telling me how fond you are of Ruth. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. I didn t say " fond ". Still you 
 are fond of the child, aren t you, Mr. Graham? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 93 
 
 (He nods violently) I knew it! (Exit MRS. 
 JORDAN in house) 
 
 GRAHAM. Damn Ruth ! (Putting his arm around 
 MRS. GRAHAM) You re not going to let that 
 dragon s gossip make you angry again? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Gradually giving way and 
 presenting her lips to be kissed) No-o-o! 
 
 (He is about to kiss her. Enter BOB, his head visible 
 as before.) 
 
 BOB. Mrs. Jordan here? 
 
 GRAHAM. (Hastily leaving MRS. GRAHAM) No. 
 What do you want? 
 
 BOB. Nothin ! (Exit BOB) 
 
 MR. GRAHAM. You ll admit it s annoying to be 
 asked if you ll influence your husband to marry 
 another woman. 
 
 GRAHAM. Did she ask you that? (MRS. 
 GRAHAM nods) The Mormon! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. You haven t heard from that 
 lawyer ? 
 
 GRAHAM. Mr. Carr? I m expecting good news 
 every minute. Guess what I did yesterday. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. I can t. 
 
 GRAHAM. Stole the marriage certificate out of 
 your drawer and took it to be framed. We ll hang 
 it in our stateroom on the boat. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Oh, Dick! You dear! (Em 
 braces him) 
 
 (Enter MEADE and JORDAN from the house. 
 MEADE signals their presence by coughing.) 
 
 GRAHAM. (Looking over MRS. GRAHAM S 
 shoulder) Never mind, Mr. Meade. We re going 
 to have this one if it provokes a riot. 
 
 MEADE. I didn t go to butt in. Miss Gray sent 
 word to wait here. 
 
 JORDAN. Miss Carruth doesn t mind me. 
 
94 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Clinging to GRAHAM) No, 
 I m getting to a point where I don t mind anybody. 
 
 JORDAN. I wish I could corner love. I could 
 make something out of that. 
 
 GRAHAM. I think you have. 
 
 JORDAN. (To MEADE) Sam, you remember my 
 bill for survivors of the Custer Massacre? 
 
 MEADE. (Moodily) You were talking about it 
 the other day. 
 
 JORDAN. (Dejectedly. Throwing wide his arm) 
 Busted ! 
 
 MEADE. That so? 
 
 JORDAN. Yes. There weren t no survivors. 
 
 GRAHAM. I never knew before how cruel those 
 Indians were. 
 
 JORDAN. So there s a great big home planned with 
 nobody to fill it. I wonder if any Mexican war 
 veterans are alive. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Laughing) I m afraid not. 
 Why don t you get the encyclopedia and find out. 
 
 JORDAN. Thanks. I will. (Goes to steps) 
 There ought to be some money in Mexican war 
 veterans. (Enter ANNA from house. JORDAN 
 bows and exits) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (To ANNA) Hello. How s 
 your headache ? 
 
 ANNA. (Wearily) Better. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. "You look pretty bad. 
 
 MEADE. (To ANNA) Good-morning. (To the 
 others) I want to talk to Miss Gray. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Starting up steps) Oh, I beg 
 your pardon. 
 
 GRAHAM. And I. 
 
 ANNA. (To GRAHAM) Do you mind waiting 
 a moment, Mr. Graham? You ll excuse him, won t 
 you, Miss Car ruth? 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Certainly. (To GRAHAM) I ll 
 wait for you on the front steps. (Exits) 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 95 
 
 GRAHAM. (To ANNA) Now I m at your service. 
 
 MEADE. (To ANNA remonstratingly) But 
 but I ve got something to say that concerns you. 
 
 ANNA. What I have to say concerns both of you. 
 (To GRAHAM) A hundred dollar bill was taken 
 from the Treasury. (To MEADE) Mr. Carlyle 
 sailed from New York this morning for Venezuela. 
 (To both) Mr. Carlyle took the bill. 
 
 (MEADE turns up-stage moodily.) 
 
 GRAHAM. I knew he d gone I guessed the 
 reason why. 
 
 ANNA. (To GRAHAM) He wanted you to know 
 what he had done before he began working for you. 
 
 GRAHAM. I don t care what he s done; I believe 
 in whaf he is goin^ to do. 
 
 ANNA. And so? ! ^ 
 
 GRAHAM. I shall cable him to report for duty. 
 Is that all? 
 
 ANNA. (Much moved) That is all except 
 thank you. 
 
 GRAHAM. Then I yield the floor to Mr. Meade. 
 (E.rit in house) 
 
 ANNA. Well? 
 
 MEADE. Well, I was sent here to arrest you. 
 
 ANNA. But you know I didn t make that bill. 
 
 MEADE. You say now you didn t; you said last 
 night that you did. 
 
 ANNA. Oh, but I said that to give Perry time 
 enough to get away. 
 
 MEADE. All right. Maybe you would like to tell 
 that to the chief, and be sent up for aiding and 
 abetting a felony. 
 
 ANNA. Why, I never thought of that. 
 
 MEADE. The chief will. 
 
 ANNA. But now you can tell him I didn t do it. 
 
 MEADE. Well, if that ain t like a woman. What 
 I know cuts no ice with the chief. I can t say, 
 
96 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 " This girl s not guilty. I love her and that proves 
 it." 
 
 ANNA. But you couldn t arrest me. 
 
 MEADE. I wouldn t ! Unluckily I m not the only 
 man in the secret service. 
 
 ANNA. No, but you were the beginning of this.. 
 Why couldn t you have dropped the case ? Why did 
 you have to track down the man I love? 
 
 MEADE. My duty. It ain t fair to blame me. 
 
 ANNA. No, it isn t. I m sorry for what I did 
 yesterday, too. I might have got you into great 
 trouble. I had to save Perry and there was no other 
 way. You d have done just what I did in the same 
 place. 
 
 MEADE. I only wish you loved me that much. 
 
 ANNA. Now, what s to be done? What s to be 
 done? 
 
 MEADE. I don t know. You ought to ve looked 
 before you leaped. 
 
 ANNA. I d do the same thing again, even now. 
 Only I was thinking about my brother 
 
 MEADE. The little chap, huh? 
 
 ANNA. Yes. 
 
 MEADE. You ve got to bring Carlyle back. 
 
 ANNA. No. 
 
 MEADE. It s no good saying no. This is serious. 
 You re likely to go up for six or seven years. 
 
 ANNA. Better I should suffer than he. 
 
 MEADE. Well, I ll be damned. Excuse me, but I 
 will. 
 
 ANNA. See here. There s nothing to prove that 
 a bill was ever made. Couldn t you say that none 
 was made? 
 
 MEADE. Yes unless the bill turns up. 
 
 ANNA. I d forgotten that. 
 
 MEADE. You ll have to get the bill. 
 
 ANNA. I can t; I tried yesterday. 
 
 MEADE. Do you know who took it? 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 97 
 
 ANNA. A ticket agent named Jones at the B. & O. 
 
 MEADE. (Running to steps) Well, that s easy! 
 
 ANNA. Wait ; I made his assistant turn the office 
 upside down looking for it. The note s gone. 
 
 MEADE. Of course; gone to the B. & O. offices 
 in Baltimore, and I m going after it. 
 
 ANNA. (Hopeful again) Do you suppose you 
 can get it? 
 
 MEADE. I suppose I can try. (Exit through 
 passage up L.) 
 
 (Enter RUTH from house.) 
 
 RUTH. (Coming down steps) Mr. Meade 
 seems excited. 
 
 ANNA. (Coldly; walks away) Yes. 
 
 RUTH. Yesterday was enough to excite anyone. 
 Don t you think so? 
 
 (ANNA crosses with apparent intention of going 
 in the house.) 
 
 ANNA. Yes. (Changes mind and halts) Ruth, 
 do you do you remember speaking to me yester 
 day about my desk being unlocked? 
 
 RUTH. No yes I don t know. 
 
 ANNA. Well, I know. I want to thank you for 
 what you did. 
 
 RUTH. What I did? You mean 
 
 ANNA. I mean just what you re thinking about 
 now. 
 
 RUTH. Then what are you thanking me for? 
 
 ANNA. For helping Perry to escape from arrest 
 and from you. 
 
 RUTH. You are angry because of what I did ? 
 
 ANNA. No, because of what you made Perry 
 Carlyle do. 
 
 RUTH. I made him do? He must have been a 
 very weak man if I made him steal. 
 
98 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 ANNA. Every man in love is weak. Perry was 
 always easily lead. You knew that yet you were 
 a constant temptation to him. 
 
 RUTH. Well, he ll never be tempted by me any 
 more. I ll never see his face again. 
 
 ANNA. Thank you. 
 
 RUTH. You re welcome. (Moderates her tone) 
 No; I can t be angry with you. It s real nice of 
 you to keep quiet about those pieces in your desk, 
 and I m awfully glad they didn t get you into 
 trouble. Shall we be friends? 
 
 ANNA. (On steps) If you like. 
 
 RUTH. I do like. (Runs to her and kisses her) 
 There ! Now we are friends again ! 
 
 ANNA. It s very easy, isn t it? (Enter GRAHAM 
 through gate) Why, Mr. Graham, I thought you 
 went in the house? 
 
 GRAHAM. I did, went out the front door, made a 
 circuit of the block and behold me. I m too ex 
 pectant to sit still. 
 
 ANNA. (Somewhat grimly) Yes; so am I. 
 (Exit ANNA) 
 
 RUTH. (Coquettishly) What do you expect, 
 Mr. Graham? 
 
 GRAHAM. Oh, my laundry among other things. 
 
 RUTH. Is that all? 
 
 GRAHAM. Isn t that enough? 
 
 RUTH. (Seating herself in hammock and draw 
 ing circles with the point of her parasol) I thought 
 you might be expecting matrimony. 
 
 GRAHAM. I? (Puts cigar in his mouth) Non 
 sense! (Searches his pockets) You don t happen 
 to have a match, do you? (Finds one) Never 
 mind; I have one. 
 
 RUTH. Of the sort that are made in Heaven? 
 
 GRAHAM. (Drawing his head back as the odor 
 of sulphur assails him) Not Heaven judging by 
 the smell. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 99 
 
 RUTH. One is likely to make mistakes in mar 
 riage. 
 
 GRAHAM. There is one man who makes no mis 
 take. 
 
 RUTH. Who is he? 
 
 GRAHAM. The man who doesn t marry. (Lights 
 cigar) 
 
 RUTH. Do be serious! I came near making a 
 dreadful mistake. 
 
 GRAHAM. You don t say so! 
 
 RUTH. I should have married and then have 
 found out that my heart wasn t in my husband. 
 
 GRAHAM. Curious anatomical mix-up if it were, 
 don t you think? 
 
 RUTH. I see you won t be serious. (Leaving the 
 hammock) Will you be generous? 
 
 GRAHAM. How? 
 
 RUTH. I have tickets for the theater. Will you 
 take me ? 
 
 GRAHAM. I thought you went with Carlyle. 
 
 (Enter MRS. GRAHAM from house. She stands in 
 doorway, unseen by RUTH.) 
 
 RUTH. I want to go again. Will you take me? 
 
 GRAHAM. I m sorry; it s impossible. 
 
 RUTH. I can t see why. : 
 
 GRAHAM. (Pointing) You can if you turn 
 around. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Crossing) Mr. Graham has 
 an engagement with me. 
 
 RUTH. Oh, very well! (Enter BOB at R. He 
 is carrying two packages. She addresses him) Ah, 
 Bob, what have you? 
 
 BOB. Pictures from Veerhof s. (Gives her one 
 picture) Your mother sent me for it. 
 
 RUTH. And the other? 
 
 BOB. Man asked me to bring it to Mr. Graham. 
 (Gives it to MR. GRAHAM) 
 
ioo THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 GRAHAM. (Gives it to MRS. GRAHAM. Address 
 ing her) Here! I told you about this. (To BOB) 
 Much obliged, Bob. Here s a quarter. 
 
 (BOB puts coin in his hat. Enter MRS. JORDAN 
 from house with a letter.) 
 
 RUTH. (To MRS. JORDAN) For me? 
 MRS. JORDAN. No. Special delivery for Mr. 
 Graham. 
 
 (GRAHAM advances to L. to take letter, leaving 
 RUTH and MRS. GRAHAM opening packages 
 at R.) 
 
 GRAHAM. Much obliged. I ve been waiting for 
 this. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Holding out picture) Dick! 
 Is this nude woman yours ? 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. It s Ruth s ! 
 
 RUTH. (Much agitated) And this! (Holding 
 out frame) Certificate of marriage Richard 
 Graham and Edith Carruth! (They exchange 
 frames) 
 
 GRAHAM. Bob, the bungler! 
 
 BOB. (Indignantly) I ain t a bunghole! 
 
 RUTH. I regret having stumbled across your 
 secret, Mr Graham, but naturally 
 
 GRAHAM. There s no reason for it s being a 
 secret any longer. Edith, old girl, we ve got the 
 money. 
 
 RUTH. Come, mother. 
 
 MRS. JORDAN. Married! I think it s disgraceful 
 (Exit in house) 
 
 RUTH. Well, I d hate to tell you what I think. 
 (Exit in house) 
 
 BOB. I ain t no bunghole. 
 
 GRAHAM. I didn t say you were a bunghole I 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 101 
 
 said you were a bird. Take this and blow yourself 
 (Gives him paper bill) 
 
 BOB. Five dollars! (Throwing arms up in 
 astonishment, loses balance and falls backward over 
 fence) 
 
 (GRAHAM and MRS. GRAHAM look at each other a 
 moment and then embrace.) 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM, rm so happy. 
 
 GRAHAM. And I ! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. When do we start? 
 
 GRAHAM. A week from to-day. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. It will be like another honey 
 moon. (Enter ANNA from house. To ANNA.) The 
 cat s out of the bag at last. 
 
 ANNA. I know. I ve heard the lamentations of 
 Jeremiah Jordan. 
 
 GRAHAM. (Crossing to L. ANNA at c.) I ve 
 cabled Carlyle and we ll be with him a week after 
 he reaches Puerto Cabello. 
 
 ANNA. I m glad for him and I m glad for both 
 of you. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. I was just saying that it will be 
 like another honeymoon. Don t you wish it were 
 your honeymoon, Miss Gray? 
 
 ANNA. (Turning from them in deep emotion) 
 My honeymoon! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. (Solicitously) Oh, I hope I 
 haven t hurt you. 
 
 ANNA. (Suppressing her tears) No no. I 
 was laughing. Laughing at the thought of an old 
 maid s honeymoon. 
 
 (Enter JORDAN from house.) 
 
 JORDAN. A gentleman in the parlor to see you 
 Mr. Graham. 
 
 GRAHAM. All right. (Goes up steps) Come 
 
102 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 along, Mrs. Graham. (She pays no attention) 
 Edith ! 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. Oh, I didn t know my own 
 name! 
 
 (Exit MR. and MRS. GRAHAM hand in hand, in 
 house. ANNA looks after them an instant, then 
 sinks down on the steps and buries her face 
 in her hands. The gate at L. is opened slightly 
 and then wide. Enter CARLYLE, carrying a 
 traveling bag.) 
 
 CARLYLE. Anna ! 
 
 ANNA. My God! Perry, you didn t go? 
 
 CARLYLE. (Puts down bag) I couldn t. All the 
 way to New York the click of the car wheels kept 
 saying : " Coward ! Coward ! " I couldn t do it. 
 I had to come back. 
 
 ANNA. But your fresh start? 
 
 CARLYLE. No use, Anna. That went yesterday. 
 I told you I was going to make a man of my 
 self. I see now that the place to begin is right here. 
 
 ANNA. What are you going to do? 
 
 CARLYLE. Give myself up. 
 
 ANNA. Why? To break my heart? 
 
 CARLYLE. Don t you suppose that as soon as I got 
 a chance to think I realized that my going away was 
 going to make it mighty hot for you. 
 
 ANNA. But it hasn t, Perry. You see it hasn t. 
 
 CARLYLE. I ll go on one condition and that is 
 that you go with me. 
 
 ANNA. To Venezuela? 
 
 CARLYLE. Why not? Anna, I love you. I ve 
 always loved you. I ve been blinded, fascinated, a 
 fool, but I see now in my heart I ve always loved 
 you. You believe me? Don t you believe me, 
 Anna? 
 
 ANNA. Yes, I do. 
 
 CARLYLE. Then forgive me my desertion as you 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 103 
 
 forgave me my dishonesty. You tell me to begin 
 over again. Help me to do it. Without you I am 
 nothing. If you really have faith in me, prove it 
 by becoming my wife. 
 
 ANNA. I will. I can t go now but I ll follow you 
 to New York on the next train. 
 
 CARLYLE. You will do that? You promise? 
 
 ANNA. Yes ! Yes ! Wait for me at the steamer, 
 or rather, don t wait. Don t take any risks. If 
 anything detains me I ll sail on the next boat. 
 
 CARLYLE. Then good-bye, until to-night. 
 (CARLYLE exits at gate) 
 
 (Enter MEADE.) 
 
 MEADE. It s gone. You d better clear out. 
 
 ANNA. I will. (Starts for house) 
 
 MEADE. You can t go that way. There s a 
 
 (Enter CARLYLE again.) 
 
 CARLYLE There s a policeman in front of the 
 house. What s he doing there? 
 
 MEADE. The department sent him to help me 
 arrest Miss Gray. 
 
 (ANNA dazed.) 
 
 CARLYLE. Arrest Anna? 
 
 MEADE. For putting together that bill. 
 
 CARLYLE. (Advances to him) I m the man who 
 made that bill. 
 
 MEADE. (With the instinct of the thief catcher; 
 seizes him) Then you re the man I want. 
 
 ANNA. Perry, what have you done? 
 
 (At the sound of her voice, MEADE realizes that he 
 is breaking her heart. He looks at her, then re 
 leases his hold of CARLYLE and walks up-stage.) 
 
104 THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 
 
 CARLYLE. (Going to ANNA) It was the only 
 thing I could do. There was no other way. 
 
 ANNA. (To MEADE) Surely you can let him go. 
 Can t you send the policeman away? 
 
 MEADE. Yes; then I d go to jail when the note 
 turned up. If I could get that bill. 
 
 ANNA. Wasn t it sent to Baltimore? 
 
 MEADE. Yes, I telephoned. The B. & O. office in 
 Baltimore refused it. 
 
 CARLYLE. Then it has been returned. 
 
 MEADE. Of course ; to the Treasury. 
 
 CARLYLE. Well, I guess it s all up! (Goes to 
 ANNA) Good-bye. I won t see you again before 
 before you mustn t get mixed up in this. 
 
 ANNA. (Seising both his shoulders) You musn t 
 go, Perry ! You can t ! You re mine again now ! 
 There must be some other way! 
 
 CARLYLE. I guess it wasn t to be, dear. I m not 
 good enough for you. You ll be better off without 
 me. 
 
 ANNA. I love you. 
 
 CARLYLE. It it seems foolish to thank you for 
 for everything for the love that was too fine for 
 me to understand. But I do thank you. Good-bye. 
 (Walks to his bag and picks it up. ANNA is sob 
 bing) Now, Mr. Meade. 
 
 (Enter MR. and MRS. GRAHAM from house.) 
 
 GRAHAM. (Surprised) Hello! Carlyle! I 
 thought you were on your way to Venezuela. 
 
 CARLYLE. (With an effort to smile) No; I m on 
 my way to jail. You ll have to get a new manager. 
 
 MRS. GRAHAM. To jail! 
 
 GRAHAM. To jail! (Addreses MEADE) Because 
 of that bill ? Why, surely we can fix that ! 
 
 MEADE. If we had the bill. 
 
 GRAHAM. Had it? 
 
 MEADE. Yes ; no bill ; no evidence. 
 
THE LITTLE GRAY LADY 105 
 
 GRAHAM. I ve got the bill. (Produces it) 
 
 ANNA. (Eagerly, going to him) That bill! 
 Oh, it can t be true! 
 
 GRAHAM. (Hands her the note) See for your 
 self. The man who came to see me just now was 
 Jones, the ticket agent who changed the note. The 
 B. & O. threw it back on him and he held me 
 responsible because I d introduced Carlyle. I took 
 it up. Carlyle, you owe me $100.00. 
 
 CARLYLE (Shaking his hand. ANNA gives the 
 bill to MEADE) I owe you more than that. 
 
 (GRAHAM crosses to MRS. GRAHAM.) 
 
 ANNA. (To MEADE) Now, what are you going 
 to do? 
 
 (MEADE silently tears the bill in bits; ANNA walks 
 into CARLYLE S arms. GRAHAM embraces MRS. 
 GRAHAM. The flute is heard playing: "Believe 
 Me If All Those Endearing Young Charms".) 
 
 Curtain 
 
 (First curtain: As before. MEADE walking silently 
 up into the alley.)