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 THE LIBRARY 
 
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 THE UNIVERSITY 
 
 OF CALIFORNIA 
 
 LOS ANGELES 
 
 GIFT OF 
 
 CALIFORNIA STATE LIBRARY
 
 ABOVE HER STATION
 
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 ABOVE HER STATION: 
 
 The Story of a Young Woman's Life. 
 
 BY 
 
 MRS. HERMAN PHILIP, 
 
 PROM T1IF. ORIGINAL OF MARIA NATHU8IU8. 
 
 NEW Y O k K I 
 
 FOLLETT, FOSTER AND COMPANY. 
 
 J. BRADBURN (SUCCKSSOR TO M. DOOLADY), 
 
 49 WALKKR STREET. 
 
 M DCCC LXIII.
 
 PREFATORY. 
 
 " ABOVE HER STATION " is a chapter from the 
 actual life of the present day : the incidents do 
 not occur in this country; but it requires no 
 words to prove that they are, at least, as charac- 
 teristic of English as of Continental life. We 
 have heard too much lately of what is termed 
 " Women's questions " extravagance in dress, 
 outside display, love of finery, and all attendant 
 consequences to entertain any doubt on the 
 subject. 
 
 There is no attempt to adorn this Life Story. 
 In its simplicity and natural truthfulness it is 
 thought to be more representative of every-day 
 experience, and more likely to prove useful, 
 than any narrative of more tragic details, or 
 fearful results. 
 
 D. M. P. 
 
 2 GAYFIELD SQUARE, 
 Edinburgh, 2lst Sept, 1859. 
 
 832714
 
 ABOVE HER STATION, 
 
 CHAPTER I. 
 
 " T 'VE made up my mind: I will go to service," 
 JL said Clara to her mother. " A seamstress 
 leads a sorry life : one day passes over as dull 
 and monotonous as another ; one can never see 
 a sensible person, but must sit stitching, from 
 morning till night, and remain sitting, till an 
 old maid is the end of the song." 
 
 " You do not know what you want," said her 
 mother. " Do you remember what you said last 
 Martins' day, when your aunt Rieka was giving 
 you the advice about going to service ? Then 
 you raved about slavery, and turned up your 
 nose at servitude, and I did not oppose you. It
 
 8 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 would be a sin and a shame to let an old woman 
 live quite alone, without any one to help or care 
 for her. But I still say, you do not know your- 
 self what you want. Can you ever be better off 
 than you are now ? You are your own mistress, 
 and can do whatever you like, and do not need 
 to be ordered about by strangers. Oh ! when I 
 think over the days of my youth, " 
 
 " Yes ! yes ! I know all about your youthful 
 days," interrupted Clara, pertly ; " I shall not 
 be so stupid as you were : you ought to have 
 held the young lawyer fast. Aunt Rieka said 
 yesterday, with so much unction, that your 
 beauty had been your misfortune ; she ought 
 more properly to have said, your want of clever- 
 ness. But I tell you that my beauty shall be 
 more fortunate." Then laughing, she skipped 
 over to the mirror, and most needlessly re-ar- 
 ranged her Sunday attire. 
 
 " So godless as you have I never spoken," re- 
 plied her mother; "and yet misfortunes have 
 pursued me, I do not know how."
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 9 
 
 " That's it exactly, " again interrupted Clara ; 
 " you do not know how. Just the not knowing 
 is the mistake ; I, however, will know. And 
 now, for any sake in the world, stop grumbling 
 to-day is Sunday. You have no cause to mur- 
 mur, and I do not see why I should listen to it. 
 The whole world stands open to me, and the 
 world is so beautiful ! so wondrous beautiful ! 
 "Whether I go to service or not, it will still go on. 
 In the mean time, I shall go to the old lady, the 
 widow of the general : there I shall be well off', 
 and have money in abundance." 
 
 " And I shall starve ! " said her mother in a 
 whining tone. 
 
 " Aunt Bieka must look to that ; she has stores 
 of money in her chest. It is shameful that she 
 has left me so long to cut out and stitch, in order to 
 support her only sister. There is an end to that 
 now ; I must look out for the future ; my wages 
 must be saved ; for, when one gets money in a 
 large sum, one can take better care of it single 
 shillings and sixpences slip through the fingers.
 
 10 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 Aunt Rieka, who has always got Christian char- 
 ity in her mouth, may sometimes extend it with 
 her hand ; and the short and the long of it is, 
 when no one else is with you, she is your nearest 
 relation. And then, mother," added Clara, 
 slyly, " you will have this advantage, that, wheii 
 you have pressed all you can out of my aunt, I 
 will care for you also, so then, it will come to 
 you from two sources. Make a fine lament and 
 soften her heart ; but, as far as I am concerned, 
 you may leave all that alone," added she, laugh- 
 ing. " I know all your tricks too well : they will 
 not avail any more with me." 
 
 "With these words she drew a black silk man- 
 tilla out of a drawer, and a few small coins 
 jingled out along with it. She tossed a three- 
 penny-piece into her mother's lap, and said, 
 laughing, "Here, buy a cake for yourself, and 
 keep Sunday with it; but mind, send Kleist's 
 Dorothy ; then the baker will think it is for the 
 gentleman student : you understand me." 
 
 "Little Thousandtricks ! " said the weak moth-
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 11 
 
 er to her. The daughter had quite satisfied her 
 the last was a particularly convincing proof: 
 the clever remarks about Aunt Rieka were very 
 right; her sister must give her more assistance 
 if Clara were not at home to provide for the 
 house; and she could easily do it; she was a 
 rich widow, and had only an adopted daughter 
 to support ; and if Clara secretly helped her, as 
 a good daughter ought, then she would indeed 
 be much better off. 
 
 Mrs. Krauter was the widow of a gingham 
 weaver. She had been pretty and light-minded 
 in her youth, and had, after many adventures, 
 married this man, who, even then, was almost 
 worn out from drinking. He became worse from 
 year to year, and died after having kept his wife 
 for nearly ten years in continued want and mis- 
 ery. Fortunately Clara was the only child left, 
 and the widow had a rich sister, who, in her 
 need, was a great help to her. "Want and misery 
 had wrought no change on Mrs. Krauter : she 
 was, and she remained, light-minded, lazy, and
 
 12 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 greedy ; and even though she could shed abund- 
 ant tears over her miserable position, the tears did 
 not come from any deep feeling ; for an idle chat 
 with a neighbor over a cup of coffee was sufficient 
 to make her forget all her woes. Clara was 
 an exact copy of her mother, only that she was 
 more beautiful, and, at the same time, much 
 more cunning, and therefore still more given 
 up to the world and its soul-destroying pleas- 
 ures. 
 
 Her sister, Mrs. Bieka, was also a widow 
 even the very rich widow of the late soap-boiler, 
 Bendler. She was in every respect the opposite 
 of her sister. She was a God-fearing, industri- 
 ous, worthy woman, and had long tried her in- 
 fluence for good with mother and daughter, but 
 in vain ; all she gained was, that they both avoid- 
 ed her as much as possible, and only allowed her 
 to see their best side; which was much worse 
 than if they had laid bare the naked deformity 
 of their faults. 
 
 After Clara had ended the above-mentioned
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 13 
 
 dialogue with her mother, she prepared herself 
 for her Sunday's pleasuring, singing to herself 
 all the while. The silk mantilla was put on, and 
 the money that was shaken out of it put into 
 her pocket. Then out of a wilderness of other 
 things, she drew forth an embroidered pocket- 
 handkerchief, which was quickly cast aside, as a 
 long end of torn lace was hanging to it; she 
 then pulled out another this was torn up the 
 center. 
 
 "These infamous cotton handkerchiefs are 
 worth nothing ! " exclaimed she, much irritated. 
 
 "Give it here, child," said her mother; "I'll 
 soon stitch it up for you ; " and, threading her 
 needle, the hole was quickly drawn together with 
 long stitches. In the mean time, Clara was seek- 
 ing the most tolerable pair out of a bundle of 
 light-colored kid-gloves. 
 
 " "Where, in all the world, are the right hand 
 gloves ? " lamented Clara, again. " For the left 
 hand I have six, seven, and for the right hand 
 only three; and, stupid that I am, I have for-
 
 14 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 gotten to send them to be cleaned ; they all look 
 as black as a negro. What matter ! " added 
 she, with determination ; " I'll buy a new pair. 
 What's ninepence, more or less ? With my sky- 
 blue muslin dress I must have clean gloves." 
 
 " Aunt Kieka said last Sunday, that you ought 
 rather to wear wash-leather gloves, like Gretta," 
 remarked her mother. "Only think: she has 
 her confirmation-gloves still ! " 
 
 " Really ! " exclaimed Clara. " No ! that won- 
 der I must relate to my friends; it is so like 
 Gretta Bendler. Only to go to church, and, at 
 the most, to a very particular promenade in 
 the fields, does she ever draw on her gloves ; but 
 Gretta has a hand in the wash-leather gloves like 
 the paw of a Polar bear. Well, well, * Let every 
 one look how he drives : every one look where 
 he stops,' says Go3the All are not gifted alike." 
 
 While quoting these words, she had tied on 
 her sky-blue bonnet, laid the embroidered hand- 
 kerchief cleverly over the dirty gloves, and then 
 with a light adieu, was leaving the door.
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 15 
 
 "Stop, Clara!" cried her mother; "there is 
 your chemise appearing above the shoulder, and 
 with a great rent in it besides." 
 
 " Only tuck it down deep enough," said Clara, 
 with indifference ; which being done, she went 
 out on her way. 
 
 Mantua-makers are proverbially untidy ; it is, 
 they say, because they are always busy with their 
 needle for others, and can never find time for the 
 needful repairs of their own wardrobe. Clara 
 was not only untidy as a mantua-maker, but still 
 more so as the disorderly daughter of a very dis- 
 orderly mother, and, withal, a conceited young 
 woman, with ideas far beyond her station. It 
 was of the utmost importance to her that her 
 dress should be six yards wide, and, if possible, 
 be long enough to sweep the dust off the streets ; 
 neither could she do without her embroidered 
 cuffs, collar, handkerchief, bordered petticoat, or 
 silk mantilla. If her chemise were in rags, that 
 did not matter ; indeed, it was altogether indif- 
 ferent to her nobody could see that. To have
 
 16 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 a hole in her shoe or stocking was more disagree- 
 able ; even that did not much distress her ; the 
 defect was cleverly concealed ; here the long skirt 
 came into use. She had a serious dispute lately 
 with her cousin Gretta: though the latter had 
 not been very finely brought up, yet she had good 
 common sense, and was no friend to extrava- 
 gance. Seeing the petticoat with the broad 
 flounces, she told Clara it was quite nonsense to 
 waste so much unnecessary finery on an under 
 garment. Clara replied, that every properly- 
 dressed female At these words, Gretta, taking 
 her hand, raised her arm, and pointing to the 
 sleeve of her dress, showed her that it was half 
 unsewed. Clara continued, after a hasty excuse, 
 in a tone of irritation, to explain to the rustic 
 Gretta, that a decently-dressed female could not 
 possibly do without a flounced petticoat, in order 
 properly to keep out her dresses. " It suits es- 
 pecially," added she pertly, "for slight people; 
 for a beer-barrel figure, however, it is not nec- 
 essary." Gretta replied, "You ought to be
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 17 
 
 ashamed of your rudeness ; and if you take my 
 advice, you will mend up your torn garments, 
 and try to purchase good strong useful clothes, 
 instead of wasting your hard-earned money on 
 useless finery ; ' with your ribbons and your 
 flounces you will never entice a dog out of the 
 oven.' * You will bitterly repent, some time or 
 other, having been such an improvident fool. 
 You think so much of the world ; but I tell you 
 the world will make small account of you : you 
 think the world is a paradise, but I tell you 
 heaven is elsewhere." Ah! thought Clara in 
 much alarm, now Gretla will certainly begin 
 about her Lord and Savior, for she can speak 
 about him as if she was quite sure of her 
 salvation. Gretta was so much behind her 
 time in education that she was ignorant of all 
 novels; she knew nothing about Eugene Sue, 
 George Sand ; had never read any of the muses, 
 nor the Lovers' Almanac; she knew only by 
 
 * A German proverb, which means that fine clothes never attract- 
 ed a sensible man for a husband. 
 2
 
 18 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 name some of the classics, and even these were 
 despised and ridiculed by Aunt Kieka as unprof- 
 itable. Mother and daughter read only in the 
 Bible, and a few devotional books recommended 
 to them by the pastor of St. Stephen's Church. 
 This pastor was an arch-pietist,* who preached 
 Christ only and Him crucified, and made heaven 
 attractive and hell horrible to the people. Clara, 
 however, as soon as she observed the drift of her 
 cousin, cut short the discussion, by appearing to 
 agree with her. She did not wish to fall out 
 with Gretta, for fear of injuring herself with her 
 aunt ; for these two agreed together completely, 
 both in word and action. Clara proudly thought, 
 "Let each one see to himself; and, what's good 
 for one is not good for all." Gretta is quite a 
 home-bred lassie, therefore it is very good for her 
 to spin her own yarn, mend her clothes, knit her 
 dark-blue stockings, wear high leather shoes, and 
 wash-leather gloves ; she makes no pretensions 
 
 * A word signifying methodist, and is applied to all who try to 
 serve God, or are seemingly more religious than their neighbors.
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 19 
 
 for the future, and suits so well to the laboring 
 classes ; she would make a capital tradesman's 
 wife. "While Clara, on the contrary she sighed 
 her heart beat quickly: what shall her lot 
 be? At all events, something very superior. 
 Oh! sweet future: gay clothes, smiling faces, 
 love, pleasure, and delights ! Now she was en- 
 gaged as a lady's-maid by the general's lady ; 
 she would get into a refined circle ; people of the 
 highest rank visit there ; so many things come 
 to pass in the world, it may happen that she also 
 would be so lucky as to raise herself by mar- 
 riage. It may. Xo; it must and shall; she has 
 in her heart a secret presentiment of her good 
 fortune. The first things to be provided by 
 some means or other are, a silk dress, a brooch, 
 a fine shawl, and a velvet bonnet ; then surely 
 she cannot fail ; then the wonderful adventures 
 must take place ! and with such splendid pros- 
 pects before her, shall she give up her time to 
 patching and darning ! Every one can see the 
 reasonableness of her argument, except the
 
 20 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 home-bred Gretta. But Gretta is not only 
 home-bred, she is also uncultivated and old-fash- 
 ioned in her ideas ; she believes on her Savior, 
 and says that without him she could not exist an 
 hour. Poor Gretta ! Clara does not need the 
 Savior, and she does not know in all the world 
 wherefore she should need him. 'Tis true, Aunt 
 Rieka says He must redeem us from our sins; 
 and that without Him we are going on in a wil- 
 derness of night and ignorance, and so forth ; 
 but this Clara could not comprehend, she knew 
 nothing about sin, darkness, or ignorance. She 
 considered herself a Christian ; she had had the 
 necessary instruction in religion, but wherefore, 
 that she could not tell, as hitherto she had not 
 found any opportunity to put it in practice. Take 
 for example the simplest and most rational the 
 ten commandments. What use is the eighth to 
 her ? Thou shalt not steal ! It never entered her 
 head to steal; or, thou shalt have none other 
 gods but me ! She was no heathen who believed 
 in Jupiter or Mars ; or, thou shalt honor thy father
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 21 
 
 and thy mother ! Ah, in that she did more 
 than her duty : for day and night, so to speak, 
 she had plagued herself in order to support her 
 mother. No, she had nothing to accuse herself 
 of ; all around her was light and clear, and she 
 needed no Savior. She certainly believed on 
 God; but it was like the devils, believe and 
 tremble. She did not cast herself upon Him as 
 an Omnipotent Providence, who could guide and 
 direct her destiny that she did not desire ; she 
 wished to guide and direct herself alone; she 
 was pretty, young, clever, and cultivated her 
 good fortune was a matter of course. However, 
 she was not always free from terrors. Not long 
 ago the small-pox was raging in her street : she 
 trembled before the dire disease; but getting 
 herself quickly vaccinated, she was able again to 
 enjoy tranquillity. Shortly after the cholera 
 broke out in her neighborhood, young and old 
 were carried off, no precautions seemed to help 
 here ; then her fears recommenced Thou also 
 must die : thou also mayst be taken now, that
 
 22 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 she felt, and to die was a dreadful thought ! 
 What will then become of her! Yes! what! 
 Aunt Eieka did not fail at that time to speak of 
 future punishment and everlasting destruction 
 reserved for the ungodly. Clara did not like to 
 hear such words ; she was more and more fright- 
 ened, and yet could not help listening. She 
 could not understand how her aunt and Gretta 
 were so calm and fearless, and how they could 
 talk of death and another world, as if it was noth- 
 ing dreadful; for when she awoke in the night 
 and felt herself alone with her thoughts, such a 
 terror came over her that she trembled in every 
 limb. If thou were to die ! thought she, what 
 then ? But, God be praised, the time of terror 
 passed over; life was again rosy red. Clara 
 thought no more upon death or of judgment; 
 and if her aunt mentioned such things now, they 
 were not listened to with attentive ears ; she bent 
 her head over her work, and occupied her mind 
 with the most absurd fancies.
 
 CHAPTER II. 
 
 Clara left her mother's little room to- 
 day, she went a few doors off to call for a- 
 friend. She tapped at a low window on the 
 ground-floor : Vogler, the letter-carrier, was 
 
 
 
 drinking his coffee, and reading the newspaper. 
 On seeing Clara, he opened the window. " Now, 
 lassies gadding again ? " said he, joking. 
 
 " Oh yes ! this is Sunday, you know ; and one 
 is only young once," replied Clara, laughing. 
 
 " Yes, you rogue ! " said Vogler, " and I wish 
 I was young also.'' 
 
 " Oh, you are a man in your best years," said 
 Clara, in a flattering tone. 
 
 " I think so, too, sometimes ; but when I look 
 ut my old woman over there, a mist comes be- 
 fore my eyes," said Vogler, with a laugh, look-
 
 24 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 ing at his wife, who, pale and suffering, sat op- 
 posite to him in an arm-chair. 
 
 " When I am dead, then you can marry 
 again," said the wife with bitterness, and then 
 with difficulty drew her breath. 
 
 " And as long as you live, you must submit to 
 be teased," added Vogler, laughing. 
 
 How coarse these people are, thought Clara : 
 how can a man treat his wife so roughly. My 
 father, however, acted in the same way toward 
 my mother ; but with me it shall be otherwise : 
 I will choose a man of rank and refinement for 
 my husband. And now, away out to the de- 
 lightful coffee-garden ! 
 
 Agusta Vogler had, in the meantime, prepar- 
 ed herself for the promenade, and now trudged 
 along rather heavily by the side of her graceful 
 light-footed friend. Agusta was neither good 
 looking, clever, nor refined; she had a plump 
 red face like her father, coarse manners, and a 
 most stupidly-senseless prattle. She was, how- 
 ever, just the friend to suit Clara; she was pliable
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 25 
 
 and obedient ; did not see through her intrigues 
 was quite satisfied to play her subordinate 
 part in all their excursions together, and, as the 
 spoiled child of her father, had her purse always 
 well filled. 
 
 The two girls left the town, and walked along 
 the high road toward the coffee, or rather beer- 
 gardeu. Clara soon remarked that she was an 
 object of admiration to the promenaders; but 
 these were not the right lads ; they were either 
 tradesmen, soldiers, or, at the most, shop-boys 
 her ambition soared beyond all these. Soon 
 after a party of students came toward them, 
 and among the others one with an orange-color- 
 ed cap. This was the right one, and she return- 
 ed his bow with marked pleasure. Agusta soon 
 discovered that the students had turned, and 
 that they were following them. Clara never 
 doubted that it was for her sake that they had 
 turned ; and Agusta did not grudge her friend 
 the triumph : she was contented to be able to 
 share in the passing pleasure fine plans for the
 
 26 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 future were strangers to her brain. After a few 
 minutes, they were met by a fine-looking young 
 man, who also saluted them, but very modestly 
 and respectfully. " Who was that, now ?" asked 
 Clara. 
 
 " Oh ! that was Fritz Buchstein, who has just 
 returned from his travels ; you ought to know 
 him, for he lived next door to your aunt liieka." 
 
 " That he was a tradesman, I saw on his great 
 red hands," laughed Clara ; " otherwise he is a 
 very handsome fellow. But he goes with the 
 pietists to St. Stephen's Church ; I saw him my- 
 self this morning coming out with them all. 
 
 " Now, Aunt Rieka, rejoice ! " cried Clara ; 
 " that suits like butter upon bread ! That 
 young fellow will marry Gretta : that is all cut 
 and dried. My poor aunt was always so anxious 
 lest he should become unfaithful to his religion 
 in his wanderings ; and when he wrote a letter 
 full of unction, old Buchstein would come over 
 with his huge spectacles, and devour it amidst 
 sighs and tears with my aunt and Gretta. IS"ow
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 27 
 
 I grant her the lad with all my heart, though 
 he is really much too handsome for Gretta ; she 
 ought to have had a short, thick, strong fellow ; 
 for she considers beauty more a misfortune than 
 a blessing note well, because she herself has but 
 little beauty to boast of." 
 
 The girls now entered the beer-garden, and 
 soon discovered an acquaintance sitting at a 
 table one of those modest little milliners who 
 are employed in different houses to arrange caps 
 and bonnets for the ladies; they sat down be- 
 side her. The students took a table quite near 
 to them, and soon became very loud over their 
 Bavarian beer, and began to nod and wink over 
 to the girls ; but orange-colored cap did not stop 
 there; he made himself more at home, and 
 slipped quite over to them. Clara was by no 
 means astonished at it, for she had for a long 
 time carried on a passing flirtation with him in 
 the streets, and was also aware that he lived in 
 the same house with her future mistress and 
 that was in fact the secret spring which moved
 
 28 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 her to go to service. He was a medical student 
 even one of some standing. He was rich, 
 kept a large Newfoundland dog, rode out on 
 horseback, or drove his friends in a carriage with a 
 pair of horses. He was the leader of his party, 
 and ever to be found where there was merriment 
 or noise. His figure was large and rough ; his 
 yellow hair hung long and straight round his 
 red face, which, broad and flat, had a particular- 
 ly coarse expression. His actions and manner 
 of speaking were in accordance with his appear- 
 ance. He now sat opposite to the girls ; his two 
 elbows resting upon the table, blowing the blue 
 clouds out of his cigar, and making the most 
 unmannerly fun. Clara did not think that rude 
 no, because he was rich, and belonged to a 
 family of rank she thought it witty, and did 
 not consider herself too good to amuse him. 
 She became every moment more lively and more 
 agreeable, and it was quite plain that her beauty 
 had made an impression on him, and that she 
 was rising in his estimation ; for he removed his
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 29 
 
 elbows from the table, and took more pains to 
 restrain his words and manners. That was a 
 new triumph for Clara ; and her two friends 
 observed it with astonishment. The milliner 
 had long known the student; she had been in 
 the habit of working for the general's lady, and 
 that was opportunity enough to make the ac- 
 quaintance of a student. She would have glad- 
 ly laid her frivolous heart at his feet, and now 
 envied her companion this valuable conquest: 
 and Clara grew prouder and more pleased. 
 
 One circumstance alone troubled her. Exactly 
 opposite to her, in a solitary arbor, sat Fritz 
 Buchstein. Yes ! wonderful to relate, he also 
 had turned and followed them into the coffee- 
 garden : could that be for her sake ? She re- 
 called to her memory the days of her childhood 
 then, if she and Gretta went together into his 
 workshop, in order to get some toy repaired, he 
 was sure to mend hers the first, very much to 
 Gretta's displeasure. It was evident at that 
 time that he preferred her ; to-day he was sur-
 
 30 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 prised at her beauty so she calculated and had 
 followed her here. Though her vanity was flat- 
 tered by these thoughts and recollections, yet, at 
 this juncture, the conquest was disagreeable to 
 her. First, he was not worth remarking, and 
 her heart would never let itself down to such a 
 common-place working-man as him ; and then 
 she feared that when he had once followed her 
 steps, he might do so again, act the spy, and re- 
 late all her doings to Aunt Eieka. She had 
 seated herself so as to escape as much as possible 
 being seen by him ; but whenever she raised her 
 eyes she was sure to meet his looks, which ex- 
 pressed so much sympathy and anxiety on her 
 account, that it was every time as if a dagger 
 had pierced her heart. 
 
 "It is unbearable!" cried she at last, and 
 turned herself passionately to the other side. 
 The student and her two friends looked at her 
 with astonishment, and she explained the reason 
 of her annoyance to them. 
 
 The young medico laughed, and found it quite
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 31 
 
 natural in the lad to wish to look into the face of 
 a pretty girl; and placed his burly figure in 
 such a manner before Clara, that she was at 
 once relieved of the disagreeable looks. Shortly 
 after, Agusta remarked that Fritz was gone. 
 isTow Clara felt herself more at liberty, and her 
 enjoyment was proportionably high. The music 
 enticed, and all went into the dancing-saloon in 
 order to heat and intoxicate themselves still 
 more in the mazy whirl of the waltz or polka. 
 
 When Fritz Buchstein met the pretty girl on 
 the road, he at once recognized in her the little 
 Clara Krauter; and the finest and sweetest of 
 his youthful recollections passed through his 
 mind. Even now he remembered, with inward 
 emotion, how she used to come into his workshop 
 with some little toy to be mended, and how he, 
 a lad of eighteen, felt such strange emotions in 
 his heart when he looked into the dark-blue eyes 
 of the little maiden of twelve. lie would not 
 acknowledge it to himself, but it was his first 
 youthful love. Her face was ever present with
 
 32 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 him it followed him in all his wanderings he 
 remembered her in his morning and evening de- 
 votions : he prayed God to keep his flow'ret 
 chaste and beautiful, and preserve her from the 
 defilement of the world. Whether this flower 
 was to bloom for him or not that remained in 
 the hand of God. His heart was whole ; he had 
 not read any romances, and did not hang with a 
 sickly longing upon his love ; fresh and lively he 
 traveled through the beautiful world saw 
 mountains and valleys, rivers and plains many 
 a great town, and many a pleasant village 
 grand churches, castles, and fortresses fine 
 paintings, and other works of art and examin- 
 ed all with interest and delight. Those were 
 glorious, pleasant wanderings, which were not 
 saddened by sickness or a bad conscience, or by 
 poverty and want. He had made a vow never 
 to drink a drop of spirits, and, through God's 
 grace, he had been enabled to keep it. That 
 preserved him from many a misery, many an 
 evil of the wanderer's life. He was never led
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 33 
 
 into wild clubs or brawls, neither did he seek 
 his friends among such companions ; so, in body 
 and soul, he remained healthy, and always had 
 money in his purse ; for, being a good steady 
 workman, he always found good masters, and 
 not unfrequently found friends who were travel- 
 ing the same narrow way with himself, who with 
 him also loved their Lord and Savior. He sel- 
 dom left a town that he did not look back upon 
 with regret, because there he had won friends 
 for his heart and his intercessions : full well he 
 knew the value of prayer, both for himself and 
 others. And if he came to people who did not 
 understand him who laughed at him, and tried 
 to lead him aside from the right way, those days 
 were also of use to him days of distress and 
 trial in which he felt more clearly the nearness 
 of his Comforter, His love, and His grace. So 
 his soul grew stronger, his experience richer, and 
 his hands more skillful. 
 And how was it with his heart ? That would 
 
 sometimes dare to move. When on a fine sum- 
 3
 
 34 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 mer eve he sat on some woodland height, the 
 landscape gilded by the sinking sun ; fragrance 
 diffusing itself over town and village ; the evening 
 breeze gently fanning the branches and flowers 
 around him, the shepherd slowly preceding his 
 flock across the pasture in the distance, and the 
 birds high up in the light-blue sky then he 
 would feel such a wonderful longing: and 
 through the golden rays of evening the fra- 
 grance, the beauty, and the peace of nature, 
 those dark-blue eyes of the little maid would 
 shine upon him from his home ! 
 
 Thus had he sat, only a short time before, on 
 an eminence in the Theuringen Forest. Now he 
 was so near to his home now the youth had 
 grown into a man, and could think of establish- 
 ing himself. His father was old, and since the 
 last winter, had been afflicted with weakness of 
 the chest, which prevented him getting his 
 orders executed as formerly : every thing went 
 wrong, and Fritz was obliged to obey the earnest 
 entreaties of his father and return home. He
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 35 
 
 was glad to do so ; for lie was now twenty-five 
 years old ; and after the long wandering home- 
 less life he had led, the idea of home was very 
 sweet. He was now to be master, and alone take 
 the direction of the house, the land, and the cus- 
 tomers. To all this a house-wife was absolutely 
 necessary, and that thought chiefly occupied his 
 mind; and whenever he pictured this wife to 
 himself, she was slight, with light-brown hair, 
 and dark-blue eyes. 
 
 "With such sweet expectations he quitted the 
 Forest of Theuringen, and arrived a few days 
 later at the gates of his native city. It was late 
 on Saturday evening : his father sat weak and 
 ill in his arm-chair, but tears of thankfulness 
 and joy glistened in his eyes, as his son, after 
 such a long absence, entered the house; and 
 Fritz had the same evening to read the book of 
 Job, and the 136th Psalm to him. 
 
 The old father was very conversible, notwith- 
 standing his delicacy of chest; and could not 
 avoid speaking to his son, of his and Mrs.
 
 36 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 Bendler's heart's desire, namely, that Gretta 
 should become Mrs. Fritz. Mrs. Bendler had 
 completely adopted Gretta, and, excepting a few 
 legacies, she was to he her sole heiress. 
 
 Fritz felt very much distressed when he heard 
 this ; and if he had very little courage hefore to 
 ask after Clara Krauter, he had none at all now. 
 
 On Sunday, he was to call and renew his ac- 
 quaintance with his neighbor, Mrs. Bendler; 
 but he begged his father not to say a word about 
 the matter of marriage, as he did not know, as 
 yet, how he would please Gretta. 
 
 His father smiled, thought there was not much 
 danger of her not liking him, as she had wept 
 so profusely when his letters were read to her. 
 
 Fritz did not smile, his heart was heavy ; for 
 though Gretta was a good girl, she had not blue- 
 eyes ; she was not the love of his youth ; her im- 
 age had not been ever present with him in all his 
 wanderings. 
 
 When coming out of church on Sunday morn- 
 ing, he recognized Mrs. Bendler, accompained by
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 37 
 
 a young girl ; but lie could not resolve then to 
 speak to them, so slipped aside with the crowd : 
 he had only promised his father, toward evening, 
 to call on them. 
 
 In the afternoon, however, his uneasiness and 
 anxiety drove him past Clara's house. He could 
 not discover her; only her mother sat at the win- 
 dow ; and, fortunately, she did not look out, or 
 she would have read his thoughts in his counte- 
 nance. He walked out of the city-gate, and 
 after having gone a little way along the road, 
 turned back again. Then, in reality, the long- 
 desired one appeared before him! It was still 
 the same youthful face, her figure only had 
 sprung up, and become developed into woman- 
 hood. 
 
 He bowed to her: his heart beat for joy; but 
 it was only for a moment. He saw the band 
 of students behind her he heard their coarse 
 wit saw them following the girls. It would 
 never have entered his head to turn and follow 
 them ; but rage and anxiety drove him to it. In
 
 38 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 case of need lie would protect the girls, never 
 dreaming that by the following of the students, 
 they were more pleased than frightened. How- 
 ever, he was soon convinced of his error, as he 
 sat opposite to the girls, and observed their 
 light-minded behavior, in which Clara played 
 the principal part, till at length she drove him 
 away by her scornful and angry looks. 
 
 "With what conflicting feelings he now return- 
 ed to his home! "What had just occurred, had 
 too suddenly and too violently overturned the 
 plans of his heart. The joyful anticipations .of 
 home, of being master of house and property, 
 were all crushed ; he would have chosen rather 
 to take again his pilgrim's staff in his hand, and 
 wander alone in the wide world. In this 
 humor he could not possibly visit Mrs. Bendler 
 he could not even present himself to his father ; 
 but softly passing the servant girl, who was sit- 
 ting in Sunday state on the door-step, he went 
 into the garden, and sat down in the vine arbor 
 which stood next the barn. The neighbor's
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 39 
 
 garden, which was only separated by a hedge, 
 was empty. That just suited him: he could fol- 
 low the train of his own sad thoughts without 
 interruption. 
 
 How different the world appeared to him from 
 yesterday ! The roses and violets were then so 
 cordial and confidential : he thought when once 
 a woman's hand is here to train and prune, then 
 you will all flourish better. The somber vine 
 arbor did not appear to him gloomy at all ; for 
 he thought, soon I will not sit quite alone in 
 here. To-day it was all an empty desert ; and 
 he did not care to have it otherwise. He looked 
 up to heaven through the dark vine branches. 
 " Oh heavenly Father ! I know that better days 
 will come ; but now the cross seems heavy to my 
 heart ; and now, Lord ! I pray Thee, over and 
 over again, deliver her from evil ; even though I 
 must resign her for myself. Do Thou, Lord ! 
 never leave her nor forsake her." Give up ! 
 Yes; that is indeed hard; and that it was so 
 hard, was -also a comfort to him; for if to his
 
 40 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 weak, human heart it was so hard, he knew well 
 that it would be still harder to his Savior above 
 to give up a beloved soul; and the more he 
 gazed up into the blue sky, the stronger his 
 faith became, and his grief was relieved by tears. 
 
 Then suddenly he heard a voice singing in his 
 neighbor's garden ; clear and sweet, and yet soft 
 and sad were the tones ; as were also the words 
 of the hymn which came quite distinctly to his 
 ear. 
 
 Fritz peeped through the vine leaves, and saw 
 Gretta sitting upon the crooked old pear-tree. 
 It seemed as if he had only dreamed of travel- 
 ing and being away ; as if he was again eigh- 
 teen years old, and Gretta a child. At that 
 time, nearly the whole summer long, the old 
 pear-tree was her favorite seat. In the after- 
 noons she was in the habit of taking her stock- 
 ing up there ; and every time she had knitted a 
 round, she called out to old Benjamin. Benja- 
 min was a cobbler, who had lived for nearly thirty 
 years in the little dwelling over Buchstein's
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 41 
 
 workshop. He was the friend of all the children 
 in the neighborhood, and of Gretta in particu- 
 lar ; for her no trouble was too great ; and every 
 time she called out " one round more," he chalk- 
 ed a white stroke upon a black board, and al- 
 ways counted how many were wanting still to 
 make up the number of her task ; and when it 
 was accomplished he called out, " Now Gretta, be 
 quick ! " She would then draw up, by means of 
 a cord, a little basket containing her evening 
 meal ; for she fancied she could knit and eat 
 better up in the pear-tree than on the seat un- 
 derneath. Benjamin also laid by his lasts for 
 a season looked out of the window ; his star- 
 ling cried out, " Gretta, so right ! so right ! " and 
 the bulfinch caroled forth, " Bless the Lord, O 
 my soul ! " Then when Gretta's childish voice 
 chimed in, Benjamin said, " Gretta, so right ; " 
 and the starling echoed, " Gretta, so right ! " 
 
 Even now Benjamin's white head was at the 
 window ; the starling, however, called out " Miss
 
 42 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 Gretta ;" and this reminded Fritz that the times 
 were indeed changed. 
 
 "Ah, Gretta!" said Benjamin, "your singing 
 to-day makes one's heart sad ; what is the mat- 
 ter with you ? " 
 
 " If I had known that you were at home, I 
 would not have sung," said Gretta. " I thought 
 I was here quite alone in the world. But do 
 you come over now, and bring the large picture- 
 Bible with you, for I do not know rightly what to 
 begin ; all alone the long Sunday afternoon." 
 
 Gretta had to return home alone from after- 
 noon service, because her mother wished to call 
 upon some sick people. She had hoped, indeed, 
 to have been taken to see soma relations, garden- 
 ers, who lived a little outside the town, therefore, 
 being obliged to go home did not exactly suit 
 her ; in the house she felt lonely, she took differ- 
 ent things in hand a book a bit of work, 
 nothing came right. Old Time would not move 
 on ; she could not understand why she felt so im- 
 patient. Was it because Fritz Buchstein had
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 43 
 
 promised to look in on them in the evening ? 
 She blushed at the very thought. But why 
 should she not he glad to see him again ? She 
 was at least curious to find out what change ab- 
 sence had made on him, and if he looked at all 
 like the man, that from his letters she judged 
 him to be. In order to pass the time she went 
 into the garden. All was still in Buchstein's, and 
 quite undisturbed ; she paced up and down the 
 straight gooseberry walk. As a child, she had 
 played at sheep and wolf with Louisa Buchstein, 
 and other friends, under the bushes. Louisa was' 
 dead, and the other friends all scattered, and she 
 had to walk here all alone the blessed Sunday af- 
 ternoon. She had often sat and enjoyed herself 
 on the seat under the old pear-tree, but oftener 
 she preferred getting up into the tree. Then she 
 could see a little farther out into the world : into 
 the neighbors' gardens, a cooper in the court, old 
 Benjamin in his room. On the other side, how- 
 ever, the garden was surrounded by a high wall, 
 but yet she could see the flowers of the elder-tree,
 
 44 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 and also the yellow blossoms of the laburnum, 
 and sometimes the white lace cap of the town- 
 councilor's wife, and the gay bonnets of the 
 young ladies. Gretta could not resist it; she 
 climbed the tree. But to-day there was nothing 
 to be seen ; dry seeds hung upon the laburnum, 
 the elder-tree had a somber and gloomy appear- 
 ance, neither cap nor bonnets were there. The 
 lady was at a bathing-place, and her daughters 
 were long since married ; neither was there any 
 stir in the other neighbors' gardens, and even 
 Benjamin was not at his window. Gretta felt 
 more and more lonely, and gazed at the sky 
 with a more heart-felt desire. So it is. "When 
 the Lord makes the world more solitary and 
 empty to us, then He draws us with stronger 
 cords toward heaven. The sky was clear, and 
 the evening clouds gilded by the setting sun : 
 Gretta saw how they were gliding over the dark 
 roofs, and whilst moving, how they changed 
 their forms and colors. Now she saw a swan, 
 then a rose, a castle, sometimes the wings of an
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 45 
 
 angel, and sometimes an angel's face. She 
 thought of her parents, her little brother, of 
 whom she had a faint recollection from early 
 childhood ; and with the most longing desire to 
 be with them, she sung the verses which had 
 enticed Benjamin to the window. 
 
 Benjamin came down with the great picture- 
 Bible, swung himself under the shed and the old 
 elder-tree, and quite nimbly over the hedge, and 
 was in Bendler's garden. At that moment Fritz 
 came forward from the arbor ; for he would not 
 knowingly play the listener. Gretta started ; for 
 he must have seen her up in the tree, and 
 had certainly heard her singing: he, however, 
 stretched out his hand in a friendly manner, over 
 the hedge, and shook hands with her, without 
 any observation. There, now, he had before him 
 the same old Gretta, with flaxen hair, freckled 
 face, round brown eyes, and round red mouth. 
 She was neither tall nor short ; neither slight nor 
 thick ; but stood before him, in her brown cot- 
 ton dress and white collar a very neat-looking
 
 46 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 girl. Ho spoke a few confused words of wel- 
 come to her. She did not observe his confusion 
 she hardly heard what he said so violently 
 did her heart beat ; but the world no longer ap- 
 peared empty and lonely to her ; and, when he 
 asked permission to come over to her premises, 
 she nodded a friendly " Yes ! " 
 
 " But not by the same way that I came over," 
 said Benjamin, laughing; "one must not teach 
 young fellows such tricks. You must go round 
 respectfully to the hall-door, as you ought." 
 
 Fritz did not even think of doing so; for 
 though he was quite smart in the black-silk vest 
 and Sunday coat, yet he had neither hat nor 
 gloves ; and, on the first visit, he must use a little 
 ceremony. He, however, did not come over so 
 soon as Gretta had hoped : she had looked 
 through the greater part of the large picture- 
 Bible with Benjamin, when at length she heard 
 his knock at the door ; and, going to open it, she 
 found her mother standing there also. This was 
 a great relief to both the young folks ; for Gretta
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 47 
 
 felt uneasy about actiug the hostess with Fritz, 
 and he had no desire, with his heavy heart, to 
 be alone with Gretta. Mrs. Bendler took upon 
 herself the responsibility of sustaining the con- 
 versation ; but, as she had many questions to ask, 
 Fritz was obliged to talk, whether he would or 
 not. That the task was hard for him, was not 
 perceived by Mrs. Bendler. Gretta, however, 
 quickly observed the look of deep melancholy 
 that, quite unconsciously, at times passed over 
 his face. "What can be the matter with him? 
 thought she : can he be sorry to be at home 
 again? can any thing be alluring him from home? 
 Oh, I do hope he is not unhappy ! But how 
 could that possibly be the case, when his last let- 
 ter was so joyful, so hopeful ? 
 
 Late in the evening, when alone in her little 
 chamber, she looked up to the starry heaven with 
 folded hands, Fritz's melancholy face mixed itself 
 in her evening prayer, and she recommended it 
 to Him who afflicts not willingly the sons of men, 
 and who alone can comfort the sad heart.
 
 CHAPTER III. 
 
 MRS. VON TRAUTSTELN", the general's 
 widow, sat in deep conversation with a 
 younger lady. 
 
 " I assure you," said the latter, " the girl will 
 suit you exactly, and I can conscientiously recom- 
 mend her to you. For the last two years she 
 has sewed every thing for my children, and she is 
 quite the pet of the house : always friendly and 
 obliging, very clever and industrious, and belongs 
 to a very respectable family. Her aunt is Mrs. 
 Bendler, who is at the head of the ' Society for 
 Sick Poor Women :' a person most highly re- 
 spected. It was she who brought up Clara, and 
 had her taught dressmaking, for Clara's mother 
 is a sickly body."
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 49 
 
 " What has put it into her head to go to ser- 
 vice ? " asked the old lady. 
 
 " In order to be tor sometime amongst stran- 
 gers," was the answer; "and I think it very 
 sensible of her. While she is at home her 
 mother takes every penny out of her purse. She 
 told me with tears lately, that she was very ill 
 provided with under-clothing, as the little money 
 she could earn was barely sufficient for their 
 daily wants, and a few outside necessaries, in 
 the way of dress, without which no one would 
 let her into their houses to sew." 
 
 " That is exactly what I fear," replied the 
 general's lady. " The mother must be a dis- 
 orderly person, who swallows up all her daugh- 
 ter's earnings in eating and drinking: the 
 daughter is too young, and, very probably, too 
 pretty for me." The younger lady laughed. 
 
 " That is just the reason why I wished you to 
 have her, because she is so very attractive. 
 Whenever you would be suffering, she would be 
 the most agreeable companion ; she can read to
 
 50 AI/OVE HER STATION. 
 
 you, for she speaks very prettily ; but, my dear 
 lady, before making any decision, you must first 
 see her." 
 
 The speaker was the young wife of Lieutenant 
 von Reisen, a lady who had taken Clara particu- 
 larly under her protection. She was anxious to 
 gratify her protegee by obtaining the situation 
 for her ; and for that reason she exerted herself 
 to the utmost to excite an interest in the old 
 lady for Clara before she saw her. A short time 
 after, Clara was ushered in. Very neatly dress- 
 ed, but, at the same time modest and unassum- 
 ing, she stood before the ladies. The general's 
 widow was really astonished at the beauty of 
 the girl ; but the charm of her words and man- 
 ner silenced every doubt, and she was engaged 
 at once at a salary of six pounds a-year, with a 
 pound at Christmas, besides other presents. It 
 seemed quite a fortune to Clara. But that was 
 not all the luxury and grandeur displayed in 
 the dwelling of Madame von Trautstein, so daz- 
 zled and delighted her that she actually, for the
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 51 
 
 moment, forgot all her plans about the medical 
 student : such spacious rooms, splendid carpets, 
 fine furniture, equipage, and number of servants, 
 were seldom found in one establishment. In 
 this house she was engaged as lady's-maid, that 
 is to say, under the title of lady's-maid; for, 
 properly speaking, she said to herself, I shall be 
 the lady's companion, as I am to read to her in 
 the evenings, and when there are no visitors, to 
 pour out tea : and she did not fail to represent 
 her new situation as such to her acquaintances. 
 When she went to inform her aunt Rieka, the 
 latter received her very seriously. " You have 
 now fulfilled my wishes by going to service : may 
 the Lord give you strength and grace for all the 
 duties of your new calling, which you must by 
 no means consider a light one." Clara, who was 
 full of hope, and in a very good humor, prom- 
 ised every thing possible, and her aunt was too 
 2:ood-natured to doubt her intentions or her 
 
 O 
 
 promises. To the question, as to the state of 
 her under-garments, she had a suitable answer
 
 52 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 ready. She could not possibly have told the 
 truth : indeed, for a long time, her great fear had 
 been lest her aunt should herself examine her 
 linen, and discover its deficiency. 
 
 " I am already provided with the most neces- 
 sary articles," she said, and rejoiced in the idea 
 of procuring herself a fine stock of linen from 
 the good wages she was to get. " My mother 
 must learn to economize," she added ; " you 
 know that when I had money, as a daughter, I 
 could not refuse her ; but when I have not got 
 any, I cannot give any ; and when I receive my 
 wages, if I give her a portion, I can, with the 
 remainder, replenish my stock of linen." That 
 sounded sensible, and the aunt was quite con- 
 tented. Gretta went to her drawers, and brought 
 out six linen pocket-handkerchiefs, and two pairs 
 of stockings : " These I may ofl'er to you," said 
 she, " for you have had no time for knitting, and 
 the handkerchiefs were hemmed and marked for 
 you. "When you come to see us, be sure to take
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 53 
 
 one of the linen ones," said she laughing, " for 
 you know we cannot bear those of cotton." 
 
 Clara was quite affected by this goodness. 
 " You really mean well with me," said she, affec- 
 tionately. 
 
 " That you may always believe," answered 
 Gretta, warmly : and the two cousins had at that 
 moment very kindly feelings toward each other. 
 
 Clara entered her new situation on St. Mi- 
 chael's day. In her chamber she found a ward- 
 robe and a chest of drawers, wherein she distrib- 
 uted her scanty supply of clothes as widely as 
 possible, in order to make the greatest display. 
 One or two muslin, and a few thin woolen 
 dresses, mantilla, mantillettes, and the flounced 
 petticoat, in the wardrobe : in the drawers, be- 
 side the few chemises, etc., ribbons, boas, collars, 
 gloves, pocket-handkerchiefs : the two pairs of 
 stockings from Gretta, formed the soMd parts of 
 this light society. Then she placed a few flower- 
 pots in the window, hung a porcelain picture on 
 one of the panes, another picture under the
 
 54 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 looking-glass, and a vase of flowers upon the 
 drawers. The butler had looked into her room 
 en passant, and remarked to the cook, that the 
 young girl was evidently well-reared and well- 
 educated, for she displayed much taste in the 
 arrangement of her room; "but it is a pity," 
 added he, " that the window of the next house 
 is so near hers, that the medical student can see 
 exactly into her apartment." The cook, how- 
 ever, took Clara's part: her kitchen was just 
 opposite, on the other side of the house, and she 
 had observed that Clara had let down her blind 
 when the student came over to his window with 
 his long pipe. Clara had seen the cook looking 
 over, and thought, " Now, I must be cautious, in 
 order to gain respect : and a little coyness to- 
 ward the student cannot do me any harm." 
 
 These were now pleasant days for Clara. The 
 house of Madame von Trautstein became very 
 lively, as her married daughter with her children 
 came on a visit of four weeks ; and this gave 
 opportunity for many a little socialness. Beside
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 55 
 
 that, Clara was often sent to the grand shops in 
 the town to make purchases, and this was partic- 
 ularly agreeable to her. She was soon on a 
 friendly footing with the clerks, and enriched 
 herself with many a piece of finery. 'Tis true, 
 the few pence she brought into service with her 
 were soon spent ; but the sum was so small it 
 was not worth saving. In addition to all this, 
 the game with the student was pushed on stead- 
 ily and cleverly. Her mistress's visitors were 
 chiefly ladies ; from these she could not hope to 
 gain any thing toward her future establishment. 
 She soon observed that the student was in full 
 glow, and a very humble lover if she kept her 
 blind down for a single day, her ears were re- 
 galed with the most melancholy songs if she 
 acted prudishly toward him, his great rough face 
 assumed quite a soft, tender expression. She 
 teased him expressly for she was well aware, 
 that until his passions were fully excited, he 
 would never think seriously of her; and her 
 whole ambition was to make a great marriage.
 
 56 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 She forgot to calculate that she herself would in 
 time warm to him ; and a heart in love is a weak 
 heart. The student, on his side, was not so in- 
 experienced as not to know and observe all this. 
 It was now Christmas. Madame von Traut- 
 stein's visitors had all left : the gay noisy days 
 were followed by peaceful ones ; but Clara con- 
 tinued equally attentive and cheerful ; and the 
 general's widow assured her friends that she had 
 quite a treasure of a lady's-maid ; which was 
 readily believed : for Clara was attentive and 
 good-natured to every one ; only for some time 
 past she had shown at times an absence of man- 
 ner, and her countenance had a less ingenious 
 expression. However, the old lady comforted 
 herself by imputing her fears to her over-anxiety 
 about love affairs, and did not let Clara see that 
 she was observing her ; and at Christmas she 
 made her some very valuable presents, which 
 were most acceptable ; for she had many wants. 
 She saw many things with the grand ladies that 
 pleased her fancy, and that she could not think
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 57 
 
 of denying to herself. She discovered, with as- 
 tonishment, that when she had paid all her debts 
 from her wages and her Christmas-box, very 
 little remained for her mother, or the fine stock 
 of under-clothing she proposed buying for her- 
 self; but she was soon consoled. " Every begin- 
 ning is difficult," thought she ; " the linen must 
 be bought at some other time :" she had, however, 
 procured the much-desired shawl, the brooch, 
 and the velvet bonnet. 
 
 But notwithstanding all this, she was not to 
 pass into the new year quite free from care. On 
 Sylvester evening, as she was returning in the twi- 
 light, after having been on an errand some- 
 where, she saw a person waiting at the hall door ; 
 and soon recognized the medical student. She 
 had often talked with him here, but latterly he 
 could never meet her alone ; and even now steps 
 were heard upon the stairs. He came hastily to- 
 ward her, pressed a letter into her hand, then ran 
 quickly up stairs before. 
 
 Clara could hardly light her lamp fast enough,
 
 58 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 in order to read this precious document a docu- 
 ment written, like a thousand others, in order to 
 deceive foolish girls, and make them still more 
 foolish. Nothing in the world is so ridiculously 
 stupid as these love-letters ; they are almost al- 
 ways the same one is an exact copy of another. 
 The writer finds in every girl a goddess, an 
 angel, a superior being; the receiver, however, 
 believes that the fulsome stuff suits for her alone : 
 her heart beats with pride, for she is happier than 
 a thousand others. Further, she sees in her 
 letter words of burning love, unbearable suffer- 
 ing, and everlasting fidelity. All this is worthy 
 of credence ; for is she not well worthy of being 
 loved ? and must she not have a heart of stone if 
 she left the poor fellow to suffer all these tor- 
 ments alone ? No ; she must respond to his af- 
 fection. Anguish or misfortune can never ap- 
 proach her ; for his feelings are to be everlasting, 
 and her happiness must also be everlasting. The 
 poor deluded girl never dreams that the eternity 
 mentioned in her letter very rarely extends to the
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 59 
 
 end of the year ; she has often heard him utter 
 the same sentiments, but now this assurance, this 
 written description of his feelings must be true. 
 
 So also did Clara believe, when she had read 
 her letter. Her heart beat for joy ; by her own 
 skillful management she had brought him this 
 length to think seriously of her ; now she would 
 not let him pine any longer, but would let him 
 see that she loved him. Willingly would she 
 have written an immediate answer, but she had 
 been invited to spend this evening at her Aunt 
 Kieka's, and had promised to call for her mother 
 at six o'clock. The answer to such a letter was 
 not a small matter: it must be written with 
 thought and care. Thus she went to her aunt's 
 with disquiet and uneasiness at her heart. The 
 letter, of course, she carried in her bosom. 
 
 Under ordinary circumstances she preferred 
 going to her aunt's on Sylvester evening to any 
 other in the year, for then there were punch and 
 cakes ; and, besides, though much was said and 
 sung on the last night of the year that was
 
 60 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 serious, yet the party was generally very agree- 
 able, and many a frolic made for the young folks ; 
 for her aunt was, in spite of her methodism, very 
 lively, and could be very witty, and never re- 
 strained the innocent gaiety of youth. This 
 evening, however, Clara felt quite indifferent to 
 every thing; and when her friends jested her 
 about her unusual taciturnity, she appeared start- 
 led, and a sort of forced conscious smile made it 
 clear to all present that she had some secret cause 
 of uneasiness. Fritz Buchstein, who was also 
 among the guests, gazed earnestly at her when 
 the others quizzed ; and that made her look still 
 more confused. However, the festivities soon 
 made every one more lively, and they no longer 
 remarked Clara's silence. Even Fritz was com- 
 municative, and related many a droll anecdote, 
 or described some of the interesting things he 
 had seen on his travels. Gretta hung upon his 
 words, and Clara herself was forced to acknowl- 
 edge that, for a mere carpenter, he was a capital 
 fellow. The words flowed from his lips his eyes
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 61 
 
 sparkled his cheeks glowed with animation. 
 She could not account for it herself, but when she 
 looked at him, he seemed to her the personifica- 
 tion of those hero knights she had read so much 
 about in novels, so soft and mild, and withal so 
 noble and manly. She almost began to envy 
 him to Gretta, though she did feel herself so very 
 far above him : he was but an uncultivated artisan ; 
 and such a letter as she carried next her heart 
 he would not be competent to write. In that 
 she was perfectly right ; for the composition of 
 such an epistle would indeed be far above the 
 capacity of his simple mind : he was not so ut- 
 terly devoid of principle ; he would never have 
 dared to attribute so much stupidity to any girl, 
 as to suppose her to be capable of taking for 
 earnest a string of senseless phrases, like what 
 are to be found in the first low romance she may 
 lay her hands on. 
 
 Some hours had slipped by in friendly and in- 
 structive conversation, when father Buchstein re- 
 minded Mrs. Bendler of her promise.
 
 62 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 "Yes, indeed! This evening we must float 
 our little navy," said the aunt, laughing. " I am 
 myself most anxious to know how it stands with 
 the affections of my own good friends ; and as I 
 am the most curious on the subject, I shall be the 
 first to try my fortune." 
 
 The young people quite approved of the pro- 
 posal. Gretta went to fetch a basin of water, 
 walnuts, and small wax-tapers. Fritz divided 
 the walnuts carefully, took out the kernel, and 
 stuck a wax-light in each shell. The floating 
 lights danced and burned upon the water quite 
 prettily. Aunt Rieka's little boat took the lead ; 
 the others were to represent the father and son 
 
 
 
 Buchstein, Mrs. M , the organist, Gretta, 
 Clara, etc., etc. The chief sport now was to see 
 how the fleet would behave toward the admiral : 
 if they kept aloof, then the friendship was cold 
 and doubtful ; and if they came near, or sailed 
 in company, then the affection was to be depend- 
 ed on. They all seemed to stand off' from Mrs. 
 Bendler's boat; upon which she commenced
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 63 
 
 quizzing them for their coldness and want of po- 
 liteness ; when suddenly Fritz's boat, wafted by 
 a slight motion of the water, shot over to Mrs. 
 Bendler's, and, notwithstanding all the splashing 
 and shaking of the water, would not again leave 
 her. The shaking had the effect of driving the 
 other four boats together, so that both parties 
 stood opposite to each other, like two hostile 
 fleets. 
 
 " As Fritz is so friendly disposed toward me," 
 said Mrs. Bendler, " he shall be the first to try 
 the hearts of his friends." Fritz was by no 
 means curious about the matter, and wished 
 rather to let the others take the lead ; but there 
 was no help for him the old aunt named tne 
 boats, and the game must go forward. Gretta's 
 heart beat quickly, and already she began to 
 think what she would say, and how she would 
 look, if her tiny boat should betray the secret of 
 her heart. Two other young girls quizzed Fritz, 
 and agreed that it was not at all seemly that he 
 should stand like a Sultan in the midst, and all
 
 64 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 the young girls around paying court to him. 
 Clara was far above this child's-play : her thoughts 
 were absent ; the more the hours advanced, the 
 more her uneasiness and desire to answer her pre- 
 cious letter increased ; but, strangely enough, her 
 little boat was the first to approach that of Fritz, 
 which it joined, and they then sailed together 
 around the little sea. 
 
 This, of course, gave rise to much laughing 
 and quizzing; but Clara screwed up her mouth, 
 and cast a look of supreme contempt upon the 
 young tradesman, so that every eye could see the 
 state of her heart respecting him. Gretta be- 
 came quite red with anger, and had a sharp 
 word ready for utterance, which the presence of 
 Fritz alone restrained. The other two girls 
 touched each other, and smiled ; for Clara had 
 seemed as if acting the great lady over them all 
 the evening; and Mrs. M., the organist, said 
 tartly, " Oh, Miss Clara, you need not twist your 
 mouth, and turn up your nose, for you are in most 
 respectable society here."
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 65 
 
 But Aunt Bleka would not have a serious mat- 
 ter made out of mere play, and said, jokingly, 
 " On such occasions, every young girl must ap- 
 pear proud and coy, otherwise the lads would 
 become too vain." 
 
 Then the names of the boats were changed, 
 and the game went on as before ; Fritz, however, 
 kept the thorn in his heart. Although he had 
 long given up all idea of possessing Clara, yet he 
 could not sit opposite to her all this long evening 
 without an inward agitation she seemed to him 
 to be actuated by both a good and a bad spirit 
 how gladly he would have expelled the bad, and 
 bound her fast to the good angel. The dark- 
 blue eyes looked at times so childish, just as his 
 memory had pictured them to him in his wan- 
 derings. He knew much more about her life and 
 actions than any one present the eye of love is 
 penetrating he knew that the student lived in 
 the same house as her mistress ; that he had to 
 ascend the same stair, in order to reach his apart- 
 ment ; and yet Fritz could not bring himself to 
 5
 
 66 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 give up hope for her ; his sympathizing and sor- 
 rowing heart was deeply wounded by her scorn- 
 ful manner. 
 
 Thus the hours wore on the clock struck ten; 
 they began to be more serious. The old folks 
 related anecdotes and incidents of their youth ; 
 the young ones listened respectfully. This was 
 very agreeable to Fritz, for he was by no means 
 in a humor for gayety ; and a little later he pro- 
 posed reading a few verses in the Bible. He 
 turned up the 90th Psalm : his reading was slow 
 and solemn, his voice increased in power, and the 
 words seemed to flow from his heart. As he read 
 the passage, " So teach us to number our days, 
 that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom," he 
 glanced at Clara. No one observed it ; but Clara 
 could not support the look which recalled her 
 absent thoughts to the meaning of the words. 
 After the Psalm they all united in prayer ; then 
 they sung a hymn suitable to the new year. 
 
 Clara tried hard not to listen, and to occupy 
 her mind with other thoughts ; but she could not
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 67 
 
 succeed. Fritz's voice sounded in her ears like 
 the knell of a passing bell so powerful, so seri- 
 ous. She was obliged to listen ; and the longer 
 he read the more her attention was aroused. He 
 read of death the grave and decay : she was 
 alarmed, and her superstitious heart fancied the 
 fear was a presentiment of evil. " Only, not 
 death ! " thought she. " I cannot die yet ! The 
 Savior of whom they speak cannot help me; 
 His kingdom, with the everlasting mansions, has 
 no charm for me : no ; after death there is no 
 more hope for me. Such horrid thoughts em- 
 bitter the delights of life ; and just this evening 
 to have them stirred up it is really too bad ! 
 The others all look as peaceful and happy, as if 
 the} 7 had every thing sure ; Fritz seems so full of 
 the truth, his countenance so bright ; and how 
 humbly Gretta looks up to him surely such 
 looks must penetrate his heart ! " 
 
 The clock struck twelve ; all rose up to pray : 
 thus the first action in the new year was one of 
 devotion and dependence upon the goodness and
 
 68 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 care of their God and Savior. Clara was obliged 
 to do as the others did, but her heart was dark 
 as midnight ; the devil held her fast. " Oh, that 
 I was only out of this ! " sighed she ; and her 
 love-letter dragged her away from all that was 
 peaceful and serious into the lusts and turmoil of 
 the world. 
 
 Mrs. Krauter's way home lay in the same di- 
 rection with that of others of the party ; but 
 Clara had to go quite alone, and to a distant 
 part of the town ; so it was settled that she 
 should be conducted to her home by Fritz an 
 arrangement which she strongly opposed for 
 she was most unwilling to trust herself on a 
 lonely walk with this strangely good young man. 
 But there was no help for her. On Sylvester 
 night, when the streets were full of drunken 
 people, no young girl could go out alone, she 
 was told ; and she had to give in. Fritz was 
 not in the least confused ; the late devotional 
 exercises had so completely elevated his thoughts, 
 that ho felt for the time quite indifferent to all
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 69 
 
 earthly things. He looked Clara calmly in the 
 face, and conversed quite easily with her; hut 
 when they got outside, the wind blew so fiercely, 
 the rain poured in such torrents, and Clara 
 walked so quickly, that he was obliged to be 
 silent. 
 
 At length they reached Madame von Traut- 
 stein's hall-door. Clara took the key and opened 
 it. The moon just then burst through the clouds, 
 and shed her silvery brightness over Fritz and 
 Clara. She looked at him involuntarily, and 
 met the melancholy gaze of his dark eye resting 
 upon her fresh young face. He stretched forth 
 his hand, and she reluctantly placed hers with- 
 in it. 
 
 " Clara," said he, with emotion, " we are now 
 at the beginning of a new year ; may the Lord 
 watch over and bless us with His guidance, so 
 that, if we live to see the end of it, we may be 
 able to look back with a peaceful conscience and 
 an unspotted reputation. God bless and preserve 
 you!"
 
 70 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 He turned quickly from her : she stepped into 
 the house, but was obliged to stand still for a 
 few moments to recover from the feeling of faint- 
 ness occasioned by the solemn words of Fritz. 
 
 "What does he mean?" thought she. "My 
 reputation ! of that I shall myself take good care. 
 And my conscience ! I am not going to commit 
 any crime, I hope." She tried, with an effort, to 
 shake off' the impression which Fritz's words had 
 left upon her mind ; which was, unfortunately, 
 too easily done. 
 
 She had ascended to the first floor, and was 
 just going to open the door of her mistress's 
 dwelling, when she heard steps descending from 
 the second flat ; she hesitated yes, it was the 
 medical student. He had ushered in the new 
 year in a louder and wilder manner than Clara 
 had done : his face glowed from the effects of 
 wine, and, for some time, he had been awaiting 
 Clara's return with impatience. Now the words 
 flowed like a fiery stream from his lips. These 
 assurances of love and fidelity these expressions
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 71 
 
 of deep feeling ! Clara could not withstand him 
 any longer. She returned sweet-whispered love- 
 phrases, endured his kisses, and, when she at 
 length tore herself away from him, it was with 
 many promises to arrange for a speedy meet- 
 ing, where he could enjoy her society undis- 
 turbed. That was not at all difficult : at her 
 mother's she could easily meet him, for she would 
 never put any thing in the way of her daugh- 
 ter's happiness. "And," added Clara, "it will 
 be necessary to consult about our betrothal; 
 there will be many things to arrange." 
 
 " Little fool ! " interrupted the student, " who 
 would think of such nonsense? We live in the 
 present; the gods will provide for the rest." 
 Then he added a few tender expressions, and 
 went up to his own apartment. 
 
 These last words fell with a freezing influence 
 over the green fields of Clara's happiness; but 
 yet she would not allow any suspicion to prey 
 upon her mind, and went to bed to dream of 
 future grandeur.
 
 CHAPTER IV. 
 
 THE next morning Clara awoke later than 
 usual. Her good mistress would not have 
 her roused at the customary hour, in order that 
 she might recover the sleep lost while watching 
 in the new'year ; but, even then, she did not feel 
 herself quite right. She felt her head so empty, 
 and her heart so weak; she tried to make it 
 clear to herself that she was very happy : but, in 
 spite of all her reasoning, she remained uneasy. 
 Will he really think seriously of me ? Will he 
 openly betroth himself to me ? Will he acquaint 
 his parents? Such questions she was fool 
 enough to put to herself. She felt it would still 
 require great prudence on her part to discover 
 all she wished to know. So stupid as her mother
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 73 
 
 had been, who let the young lawyer slip through 
 her fingers, I shall never become, thought Clara: 
 and so think all foolish girls who begin silly love 
 affairs with men above their own station in life. 
 True, they see around them examples enough of 
 the miserable end of all similar intrigues ; but 
 they are so clever, they think their chance is 
 much better than that of all who have preceded 
 them ; they will be certain to act differently 
 until the pure heart, honor, and a good con- 
 science, together with the lover, have all slipped 
 away from them. 
 
 "When Clara went as usual to her mistress, in 
 order to help her with her toilet, she found her 
 already dressed and at breakfast ; and beside her 
 sat a handsome, slight young man, in military 
 uniform. Clara excused herself for being so 
 late ; her mistress, however, was very friendly 
 toward her, and added, " Yesterday evening I 
 had a very pleasant surprise my son came home 
 quite unexpectedly." 
 
 The young man stood up as Clara entered.
 
 74 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 Her beauty and nice manner led him to salute 
 her with more ceremony than he would have 
 used had he been aware that his mother's maid 
 stood before him. Now he felt a little coufused, 
 which Clara quickly observed a coquettish girl 
 has very fine feelings in such matters and her 
 whole manner was studied to attract the young 
 man. She moved about arranging all in the 
 breakfast-room, put the bed-chamber in order, 
 and then went to dress herself. Unconsciously 
 she began to make comparisons between the stu- 
 dent and the young guardsman : the former lost 
 much in her estimation he was really coarse 
 and ugly, and vulgar, both in speech and man- 
 ner. " After all," said she to herself, " he is but 
 a student; and most probably when he is at 
 home with his mother, the President's lady, he 
 will act otherwise. But he must learn to re- 
 strain himself also when with me : I will have 
 him to be fine and noble, like the young lieuten- 
 ant." 
 
 The house was so full of bustle and gayety,
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 75 
 
 from the succession of new-year's visitors, that it 
 was quite impossible for the student to see Clara. 
 Even in the evening there was a large party, 
 with the hall lighted up, and constant movement 
 upon the stairs. He was most impatient, and 
 hardly knew how to pass the time. With Clara 
 it was quite otherwise : she had been so busy 
 and so much amused all day, that she had had 
 no time to think of her love affair. Hitherto 
 she had only served old ladies with tea ; this 
 day, however, there were young gentlemen of 
 the party, friends of th e young lieutenant. Clara, 
 in a blue muslin dress, with her white neck and 
 arms uncovered, stood before the hissing tea-urn, 
 or glided about in the well-lighted and perfumed 
 saloons. Such a triumph had never before fallen 
 to her lot : the young men gazed after her wher- 
 ever she moved ; until at length the attention 
 of the old lady was aroused, and looking very 
 serious, she said graciously to Clara, not to fa- 
 tigue herself any longer, as the man-servant could 
 now attend to the company alone.
 
 76 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 Overheated and excited, she retired to her own 
 room. Hardly had the student seen her light 
 than he gently clapped his hands. Clara had 
 no great desire to talk with him just then; but, 
 catching a glimpse of her figure in the glass, she 
 found herself so very attractive, that she quickly 
 decided the student should see her, and convince 
 himself that she was really fit to be presented in 
 the drawing-room of a President. Yes ; her 
 pride and vanity had risen to such a pitch this 
 day, that she thought he must consider himself 
 most fortunate to win her. Indeed, she was not 
 quite sure a much higher lot might be before 
 her. The young Count, who was of the party 
 this evening, had never taken his eyes oft' her ; 
 and then she had also a chance with her mistress's 
 son, who, besides his pay, possessed a fine estate 
 in Silesia, and was of noble birth. Clara had 
 read many romances ; she knew that, not unsel- 
 dom, poor girls made splendid marriages, and 
 she had a distinct presentiment of something 
 very great for the future.
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 77 
 
 With such exalted notions about herself, she 
 stepped down to the hall : the student was al- 
 ready there before her. When he saw the lady- 
 like, condescending manner of Clara, coupled 
 with her great beauty, he swallowed the coarse 
 lover complaints that stuck in his throat, and 
 merely lamented his misfortune in not being able 
 to see her for a whole day. Clara replied, " That 
 this was not a suitable place for a chat ; and told 
 him to come the next evening to meet her at her 
 mother's." She did not refuse his affectionate 
 advances pride and vanity are no safeguard 
 against wicked desires ; on the contrary, they are 
 very good sisters, and mutually assist each other. 
 
 The next day Clara sat as usual in the ante- 
 room, sewing. The lieutenant stepped in, and 
 begged her to put a few stitches in his purse. 
 While she mended the hole with her fine clever 
 lingers, he stood silently before her. Clara also 
 was silent, but her whole manner spoke. How 
 she held her head, moved her fingers ; how she 
 looked up as she returned him the purse all
 
 78 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 that must storm the heart of the young man. 
 Clara remarked that he would gladly have com- 
 menced a conversation with her ; but the sound 
 of her mistress's footsteps was heard in the next 
 room, and he left her with a short respectful, " I 
 thank you." 
 
 The day passed over with plans for the even- 
 ing : and when the fine form of the lieutenant 
 did force itself into her thoughts, she tried to 
 drive it away. " The student must solemnly be- 
 troth himself to me this evening, and, if possible, 
 we must make a bridal visit to Aunt Eieka. 
 What will she say ? and Gretta ? they will have 
 respect for the daughter-in-law of a President. 
 The student must come to-morrow morning to 
 my mistress to ask her to permit me to resign my 
 situation, or at least to give me another position 
 in the house. He must immediately give me the 
 half of his money, in order to procure a suitable 
 wardrobe." Thus her thoughts ran on : she was 
 now above all want ; she might buy her chemises 
 by the dozen, and let them be made and so on
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 79 
 
 with every thing else. Preoccupied in this man- 
 ner, it was not at all agreeable to her to be obliged 
 to read to her mistress from six till seven. Mad- 
 ame von Trautstein was quite alone : she did not 
 expect her son till late in the evening, and one of 
 Clara's duties was to amuse her in a lonely hour, 
 by reading aloud. This evening she read very 
 badly, and the old lady was on the point of re- 
 proving her for the unusual carelessness, when 
 the door opened, and her son entered. ^Nodding 
 to his mother, he set himself in a dark corner 
 until the chapter was finished. A new power 
 seemed suddenly to spring up in Clara : she now 
 read with taste and emphasis. The lieutenant 
 never took his eyes oft' her : his mother observed 
 him with anxiety. When Clara had left the 
 room she turned to her son, saying, with a laugh, 
 " My dear Alfred, I think I must send my pretty 
 maid away, during the time that you gay young 
 fellows are dangling about the house." 
 
 " Well, mother, and suppose I should get a lit- 
 tle in love with her, you do not fear."
 
 80 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 " No, I am not in the least afraid that you 
 would be wicked enough to make a pooi* silly girl 
 more foolish than she is already ; but I have not 
 the same confidence in your friends."' 
 
 Alfred laughed. "They are all mad about 
 this beauty ; and Count Briindel, I think, would 
 not take time to consider whether he was adding 
 folly to foolishness or not, provided he could 
 gratify his own pleasures." 
 
 " Then I entreat of you, try as much as possi- 
 ble to hinder him seeing her," said his mother ; 
 " and you will be careful yourself," added she, 
 with a little hesitation. 
 
 "Certainly," said Alfred, with candor, taking 
 his mother's hand ; " and should you, dear moth- 
 er, see any danger for either of us, then just drive 
 me oft' at once," said he, laughing. 
 
 This conversation was all overheard by Clara 
 through the key-hole, for listening was not for- 
 bidden in the ten commandments. " They are 
 all in love with me," said she to herself; "and 
 Alfred is the handsomest and noblest of all.
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 81 
 
 He will never make a sport of me ; if he display 
 any affection, it will be in earnest ! " She sighed 
 Oh, if she had never begun with the student ! 
 It was not too late she might still break off 
 with him ; but she had allowed him to kiss her ; 
 she had carried on a love affair with him on the 
 stairs; she could never become Madame von 
 Trautstein. " So now bravely forward to hold 
 the student fast ; he also is a man of standing, 
 and is so very much in love, I can do what I like 
 with him." 
 
 With such thoughts as these she hurried to her 
 mother's to make the preparations for her be- 
 trothal. Two candles were burning beside the 
 little lamp : cups and cakes stood upon the table ; 
 the tea-pot in the oven ; the mother sat in an 
 arm-chair near the fire ; Clara, with her guitar 
 on her arm, reclined upon the sofa. The student 
 came, the door was shut, then commenced the 
 chatting, and fun, and love-making. The moth- 
 er was perfectly happy. The student had already 
 
 handed over a purse full of money, which was to 
 6
 
 82 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 be laid out for Clara. She must confess that 
 Clara had gone much more skillfully to work than 
 she had in her young days. Clara was much 
 more coy and lady-like, and commanded more 
 respect. Poor foolish old woman : she did not 
 remember that the end of a cunning sinner is 
 the same as that of the soft, silly one. Clara 
 now thought it time to make her proposals for a 
 public betrothal this very evening, and suggested 
 that they should go and make a bridal visit to 
 Aunt Eieka. The student, at first, looked con- 
 founded, then burst into a loud laugh. He had 
 already had many love affairs, but such a wild 
 proposal had never yet been made to him. 
 
 " You little fool ! " said he, " how can you be 
 such a Philistine! with us love is now our busi- 
 ness, not betrothal. "When the world knows all 
 about it, then the pleasure of love is over." 
 
 Clara stood up she trembled in all her limbs. 
 " If such are your intentions, then we separate 
 at once, and forever," she exclaimed, quite en- 
 raged.
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 83 
 
 The student was again confounded, but lie did 
 not laugh this time. He discovered that he 
 would need to pursue a very different course with 
 this girl to that which had been his habit with 
 others ; and as he was very much in love with 
 her, he began to capitulate. That, however, did 
 not help him ; the girl was clever enough to see 
 through his smooth words ; and she actually be- 
 gan to dislike him. She thought of the young 
 Lieutenant, the Count, etc. she required but to 
 nod, and she could have them all at her feet ; 
 yes, it seemed as if the student alone stood in 
 the way of her future elevation ; she must get 
 rid of him ; and this it was which gave her cour- 
 age to play the virtuous heroine. She made the 
 finest speeches ; even though he assured her that 
 he would speak to his parents at Easter, but un- 
 til then the affair must remain a secret. She 
 stood her ground firmly, and when he tried to 
 storm her with his love and his misery, she 
 locked herself up in her bed-room. The mother 
 played a sad role in this piece ; her heart was
 
 84 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 softer than the daughter's ; she would willingly 
 have seen the miserable lover made happy, to 
 which the fine full purse, lying on the table, 
 helped to move her : she tried hard to console 
 him : promised to talk over her daughter, and so 
 kept up his hopes. Clara, however, stoutly with- 
 stood all appeals, stood aloof, firm, and proud as 
 a queen. " Now, you see," said she to her moth- 
 er, when they were alone, " this is the way to 
 act: no one shall make a fool of me ! " And be- 
 cause inwardly she felt humbled at having allow- 
 ed the student to slip through her fingers, as her 
 mother had the lawyer, she spoke the grander, 
 and let a slight glimmering appear of her future 
 prospects with the young nobleman ; then, in or- 
 der to fully reconcile her mother to the first ad- 
 venture, she handed over the full purse, left by 
 the student, to her care. 
 
 But when she got into the privacy of her own 
 chamber, she relieved her pent-up feelings by a 
 violent burst of tears : not tears of repentance 
 for her levity and folly no; she wept on ac-
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 85 
 
 count of her stupidity for having allowed her- 
 self to be carried away with this rough fellow. 
 If her mistress were to hear of it if the lieuten- 
 ant knew it ? But, fortunately, they knew noth- 
 ing at all about it, nor would they ever know it 
 that at least was some consolation to her : " I 
 shall take better care for the future, and not 
 make any acquaintance with rough, rude fellows." 
 And in order to comfort herself completely, she 
 recalled the conversation between her mistress 
 and her son, which she had listened to at the 
 key-hole. She could not fail ; some of her pro- 
 jects must succeed ; thus wrapped up with ideas 
 of future greatness, to be gained by her own in- 
 trigue and cleverness, she fell asleep quite com- 
 forted. 
 
 Her window-blind was now never pulled up ; 
 and the cook, who had begun to have suspicions 
 about her conduct with the student, was fully at 
 rest. 
 
 Her mistress, however, was not easy : she saw 
 the eyes of her son constantly fixed upon Clara>
 
 86 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 who looked particularly soft and beautiful. The 
 Count had said, " That girl is uncommonly proud 
 and prudish:" and Alfred had related this in 
 triumph to his mother, remarking, at the same 
 time, that her education must be far superior to 
 that of an ordinary servant girl. Clara had 
 again overheard the conversation; for when the 
 mother and son were alone together, she seldom 
 left her post at the key-hole. Those were hal- 
 cyon days; and her mind was constantly filled 
 
 with the wildest plans and dreams of the future 
 
 * 
 
 grandeur which awaited her. 
 
 But fourteen days soon come to an end the 
 time of parting was at hand; yes; the lieuten- 
 ant was off one morning, without giving Clara 
 the slightest intimation of his intention. She 
 became suddenly quite another person, absent 
 and pettish in her manner ; the serious looks of 
 her mistress first brought her to her senses. 
 
 Some days after, Madame von Trautstein sat 
 for an entire morning at her writing-table ; now 
 and then walking up and down the room in
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 87 
 
 deep thought. Clara guessed rightly : she was 
 writing a very important letter to her son. " I 
 would give all in the world," thought Clara, "to 
 read that letter ; and if it is not sent to the post 
 to-day, it is still possible. Chance j favored her 
 the afternoon was taken up by a succession of 
 visitors : in the evening the old lady had an en- 
 gagement with a few friends, so that she had no 
 time to finish her letter. 
 
 "With a beating heart Clara heard the carriage 
 drive off with her mistress, and as the man-ser- 
 vant had gone with her, it was just the time for 
 her to gratify her wicked desire of reading the 
 letter. She quickly brought all the small keys 
 she could find : tried with trembling fingers to 
 open the lock ; but in vain. Ten times she ran 
 to the door to listen if any one was coming : for 
 the first time in her life she felt strong warnings 
 of conscience, but for the first time in her life she 
 had descended from the steps of levity and folly, 
 to commit actual crime. Like a thief she stood
 
 88 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 before the locked writing-table, and was she not 
 actually going to steal ? 
 
 The lock would not move, the carriage came 
 back: Clara quickly left the apartment. 
 
 In her own room she thought over the affair 
 more quietly, even blamed herself for her foolish 
 fears: reasoned with herself, that it was not 
 such a very great thing to read another person's 
 letter, and would gladly have tried again ; but 
 she was obliged to wait until the coachman 
 should take out the carriage to go for his mis- 
 tress. Now she went more cautiously to work, 
 practice soon makes all things easy ; therefore, 
 we are warned " To beware of the first step in 
 vice, for the others soon follow, and lead to a great 
 fall." But even now the lock would not open, 
 though attempted with much greater care, and 
 Clara was obliged to go to bed with her highly- 
 excited curiosity unsatisfied. 
 
 The next morning she went, according to cus- 
 tom, at an early hour, to light the fire in her 
 mistress's room ; and, as usual, the bunch of keys
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 89 
 
 lay on the little table beside the night lamp. 
 What a chance to open the writing-table ! 
 Hitherto Clara had never thought of disturbing 
 them, but this morning the temptation was too 
 great. Taking them up softly, she quickly left 
 the room, locked the door after her, and also 
 that of the ante-room, though the man-servant 
 had nothing whatever to do there at that hour 
 of the morning ; " but the wicked flee when no 
 man pursueth." ~No\v she easily opened the 
 writing-table : there stood a little box full of 
 money, beside it lay the letter ; the money had 
 no attractions for her, but the letter had many. 
 She skimmed it over hastily, but discovered 
 enough to set her thinking for days. The 
 mother warned her son against his own heart ; 
 she desired to preserve him from a love that 
 would certainly render him unhappy, if not for 
 years, at least for days. Then she described 
 Clara's conduct, her motives and actions, with 
 such truthfulness, that the very reading of it 
 caused her to blush deeply. Yes, the sensible,
 
 90 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 clever old lady had completely seen through all 
 the coquettish intrigues, and silly ambition of 
 the girl. " She is faithful and honest, clever and 
 industrious ; " so ended the old lady's portrait of 
 her maid, " therefore I shall not send her away, 
 but shall make it my duty to watch over her 
 more closely, which, in the quiet routine of my 
 life, will not be very difficult." 
 
 Clara was dreadfully excited. She carefully 
 replaced the letter, locked the writing-table, and 
 put the keys where she found them. She had 
 succeeded admirably ; and although there were 
 many things in the letter which vexed her, yet 
 there were others of an agreeable nature the 
 lieutenant loved her, his mother feared it. 
 
 Her grand^ desire now was to read the answer 
 to this letter. With the utmost assiduity did she 
 watch the arrival of the postman; at length, 
 after eight days waiting, she discovered the Ber- 
 lin postmark and the family arms upon the seal 
 of a letter. The old lady took this letter with 
 very great eagerness from Clara, and opening it
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 91 
 
 quickly, began to read. Clara dallied about the 
 room, dusted here, arranged there, in order to 
 gain time to observe the countenance of her 
 mistress, which at first expressed great serious- 
 ness, cleared up gradually, however, and finally 
 was illuminated by a friendly contented smile. 
 This smile pierced like a dagger into the heart 
 of Clara. Never had any day seemed so tedious 
 to her as this one ; for she could not possibly re- 
 new her clever trick at the writing-table before 
 the next morning, and satisfy her burning curi- 
 osity by reading the letter from the lieutenant to 
 his mother. 
 
 Morning came at last : Clara was in her mis- 
 tress's apartment half an hour earlier than usual. 
 Madame von Trautstein still lay peacefully sleep- 
 ing. Clara took the keys, found the letter at the 
 top of the papers, and opening it, quickly read 
 as follows : 
 
 " If I have caused you a moment's anxiety, 
 my dearest mother, I am sincerely sorry ; but 
 with all honesty I can assure you that it was
 
 92 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 wholly needless. I shall not deny that, at first, 
 the pretty girl interested me, and I was curious 
 to discover if any thing really desirable lay be- 
 neath the beautiful surface. I am quite of your 
 opinion respecting her character ; for during the 
 last few days of my visit to you, I observed sev- 
 eral little things in her which convinced me she 
 was a low-minded coquette; and I much doubt 
 if you will not find it a more difficult matter 
 than you think to watch over her. Count Briin- 
 del is seriously taken with her, and he will spare 
 neither money nor trouble in order to form a 
 connection with her." 
 
 A slight movement was heard in the next 
 room : Clara started she listened all seemed , 
 again quiet ; but her fear was great, and she only 
 looked toward the end of the letter. 
 
 " Yes, beloved mother, my heart was already 
 occupied before I saw you last ; the noble purity 
 of my Adelaide has completely conquered me, 
 and I hope soon to be able to present you with 
 a worthy daughter-in-law."
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 93 
 
 Again, there were unmistakable sounds in 
 her mistress's chamber, so Clara put back the 
 letter, and quickly locked the writing-table. 
 What a discovery was that for her ! 
 
 Rage and disappointment distracted Clara's 
 heart. Here, then, she could do nothing; the 
 young man was not poetical, not romantic 
 enough to act in any way contrary to the usages 
 of society ! All the pangs of unfortunate love, 
 which she had ever seen described in novels, came 
 over her happily not for a very long time.
 
 CHAPTER V. 
 
 THE winter had been unusually severe : even 
 in the middle of February there was snow 
 and hard frost. The sky was clear, the sun 
 shone upon the white roofs, the people stumbled 
 against one another in the slippery streets, and 
 could by no precautions guard against red noses 
 and blue ears ; and the fantastic ice-flowers upon 
 the window-panes were scarcely thawed by mid- 
 day. 
 
 Gretta passed many tranquil hours behind 
 these ice-flowers. She sat opposite to her moth- 
 er, and spun, and thought : and sometimes she 
 thawed a little window for herself with her 
 breath. Then she saw the blue sky, the golden 
 sun, which gave her joyful anticipations of the
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 95 
 
 pleasant spring, with its flowers, and birds sing- 
 ing in the fresh green trees, and many other 
 agreeable things; and her heart beat warmly 
 behind the cold ice-flowers on the window. 
 Sometimes she discovered, through her peep-hole, 
 the red face of some poor journeyman out of 
 work, who looked entreatingly toward her then 
 she gave him a trifle to help him on his way ; or 
 she watched with affection the little birds hop- 
 ping upon the window-sill to pick the crumbs. 
 Every day, after breakfast and dinner, she went 
 into the garden and scattered crumbs for the 
 birds, and whenever she appeared, Benjamin 
 would open his window, and call out a friendly 
 good-day to her. 
 
 For some days, however, the little window had 
 not been opened, and the ice-flowers never moved 
 from the panes. Gretta told this to her mother, 
 and they consulted together about it. Benjamin 
 must surely be ill : inquiries must be made about 
 him. There had been very little intercourse be- 
 tween the neighbors' houses this winter. Mrs.
 
 96 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 Bendler remarked with pain that Fritz Buchstein 
 would not approach Gretta at all. Her feelings 
 of propriety prevented her making any advances 
 of friendship, and this fear on her part, of being 
 too forward, almost put a stop to all visiting. 
 Old Buchstein, who had formerly carried on the 
 friendly intercourse with such spirit, was now 
 quite restrained : Fritz refused to have any thing 
 to do with Gretta ; and the kind old man did 
 not like to force the inclinations of his son. He 
 did not know now what to say to Mrs. Bendler, 
 with whom, formerly, he had had so many con- 
 versations on the subject, and with whom he had 
 made so many plans with regard to Fritz and 
 Gretta. This day, however, all these considera- 
 tions must be laid aside : Benjamin must be vis- 
 ited and cared for. Gretta went very willingly 
 to see her old friend ; but she could not help feel- 
 ing a little shy, for the way to his little dwelling 
 lay through Fritz's workshop. During the time 
 she was making a warm soup for him, she looked 
 at least ten times out upon the street to see if she
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 97 
 
 could discover any of the neighbors from whom 
 she could make inquiries about the old man ; at 
 length she was fortunate enough to see the old 
 serving woman, and obtained from her the desir- 
 ed information. * 
 
 " Benjamin is very ill," muttered the old wo- 
 man ; "but he does not require anything; he 
 wishes to carry oft' his illness by perspiring in 
 bed." 
 
 That assurance did not deter Gretta from 
 making her preparations : with her little cup of 
 soup under her cloak, she went over to the old 
 shoemaker. The sun shone so clearly into the 
 workshop, the ice-flowers were somewhat thaw- 
 ed from the windows. Fritz, in his white shirt 
 sleeves and black cloth vest, was working hard 
 with the journeymen and apprentices. He start- 
 ed on seeing Gretta's fresh face under the black 
 hood, but nevertheless he came forward in a 
 friendly manner and shook hands with her. 
 
 " I wish to go up to see poor old Benjamin, 
 
 who is ill," said Gretta, shyly. 
 
 7
 
 98 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 " To poor old Benjamin ! " repeated Fritz, an 
 sighed : " yes, he is very ill, and I have been s 
 unkind as to forget him ! Shall I carry the sou 
 up to him ? " added he softly. 
 
 Gretta gave it to him ; then followed up th 
 narrow stair. Out of the warm workshop the 
 entered an icy-cold room: Benjamin was com 
 pletely buried under the feather covering; th 
 starling stood upon the table near him lookin, 
 very sad ; the bulfinch tried in vain to pick ope 
 the frozen water in his cage. " Poor shoemaker ! 
 called out the starling, as the door opened- 
 " Poor shoemaker ! " 
 
 Benjamin's night-cap now moved, and hi 
 friendly face appeared above the mountain o 
 feathers with which he was covered. 
 
 " I thought you would come," said he to Gret 
 ta ; " and now, first of all, feed my poor birds- 
 Dolly is sulking, and has not come near me sinc< 
 yesterday evening." 
 
 Gretta looked for water, but in vain all wa 
 solid ice. Fritz saw what she wanted, and lef
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 99 
 
 the room in search of it ; and soon returned with 
 a pan full of hot water, and a shovel full of fire 
 to light the stove. Silently he gave her the wa- 
 ter silently he made the fire, and then watched 
 how she melted the ice in the bird-trough 
 how she fed the birds and how she arranged 
 Benjamin's pillows, and covered the table before 
 his bed, and placed the soup upon it. Fritz 
 looked on softly and sadly ; and as Benjamin 
 raised his eyes to ask a blessing, Gretta and 
 Fritz folded their hands and prayed with him. 
 When Benjamin ended, Fritz went over to him, 
 and taking his hand, said, " Forgive me, Benja- 
 min, that I could thus have forgotten you ; I am 
 very, very sorry for my neglect." 
 
 Benjamin took his hand in both of his, and 
 pressed it warmly. Then Fritz, turning to Gret- 
 ta, said, " And you, too, Gretta, must forgive me. 
 I feel ashamed before you, and before God, that 
 I could be so very cold-hearted, as not even to 
 ask after poor old Benjamin." 
 
 Just then a stream of sunshine broke through
 
 100 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 the thawing window, and a stream of light burs 
 in upon Fritz's heart. " Lord, thy will be done !' 
 Gretta stood before him with her forgiving 
 glance, so fresh, so friendly, and so pure ! Frit: 
 felt his future decided he felt what the Lore 
 would have him to do, and where the Lord will 
 ed that he should seek peace : the wild desire 
 of his heart must be rooted out. He now regret 
 ted the time he had lost, in allowing them t< 
 grow and increase ! 
 
 Gretta bid her old friend good-by, but hi 
 made her promise to come soon again to see him 
 
 " Yes, I too beg of you to come," said Fritz 
 " not only to see and nurse old Benjamin : no 
 you must come to convince yourself that I hav< 
 by extra care and attention made up for my sin 
 ful neglect." 
 
 Benjamin made light of the young man's for 
 getfulness, considering it very pardonable ; Gret 
 ta agreed with him, and they went down th< 
 stairs together. Below, in the workshop, in or 
 der to ingratiate himself, Fritz turned to Grette
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 101 
 
 and said, " I have long had the intention of call- 
 ing in to see you but the bad weather one is 
 quite snowed up. 
 
 " We have the snow swept away from our door 
 every day," answered Gretta. 
 
 " Yes, I know it is all my own fault, continued 
 Fritz ; and as Gretta, in passing, touched a half- 
 dried geranium with her finger, he became still 
 more confused. " The poor flower has been for- 
 gotten among the rest ; but it also shall be attend- 
 ed to." Gretta drew in her hand quite startled, 
 for she had no desire to disturb him again. In 
 this feeling, she unwillingly passed by a beer- 
 glass, which was standing on the corner of the 
 stove, though her fingers itched to push it back 
 only a very little from the edge for the slightest 
 touch would knock it down. 
 
 When they were passing the parlor door, Fritz 
 insisted on Gretta going in to speak to his father : 
 the old man was reposing in an arm-chair, with 
 closed eyes. A bright sunbeam rested on the 
 peaceful face : he opened his eyes, and seeing
 
 102 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 Fritz and Gretta standing before him, he fancied 
 that the favorite dream of his life was about tc 
 be accomplished. His eyes brightened. "Ah 
 Gretta ! " he exclaimed, and stretched out both 
 hands to meet her. Fritz turned to the window, 
 His father might have been so happy who can 
 tell how many days he has to count ? But he 
 shall be happy. Gretta's hands shall soothe and 
 minister to the evening of his life. " Yes ! yes ! ' : 
 said his heart, and his eye followed the sunbeam 
 to the blue sky, and all feelings of suffering and 
 disappointment disappeared from his mind. 
 
 Fritz had been particularly uneasy, absent, and 
 melancholy during the last few days, but he had 
 had good reason for it. One afternoon he had 
 been to one of the principal streets to bring home 
 some new furniture. In the same house, down 
 stairs, there was a bookseller's shop, and when 
 Fritz had finished his business, he called in to 
 look over the books, which the proprietor saw 
 gladly : for, after reading over many passages 
 here and there, he often made a purchase. This
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 103 
 
 day lie had dallied so long that twilight at length 
 warned him to return home. His way led past 
 the theater, which, in spite of frost and snow, 
 was well lighted, and seemed to have many vis- 
 itors. Among these, to his horror, he recognized 
 Clara leaning on the arm of a gentleman. He 
 could not resist trying to find out who was her 
 conductor. After a little going up and down, he 
 succeeded in seeing the gentleman's face : he was 
 a very handsome young man, with light-brown 
 hair, and a large moustache. Chatting cosily to- 
 gether, the pair entered the house. Fritz follow- 
 ed them. He felt ashamed to be seen there, but 
 could not restrain his inclination to watch 
 Clara. From the pit he discovered them in a 
 half-lighted box. Oh, how confidential they 
 seemed together ! He did not stop long ; he had 
 soon seen enough. Going out, he asked the box- 
 keeper who was the young man with the mous- 
 tache ? " Count Briindel," was the answer. 
 " Count Briindel ! " repeated Fritz. That name 
 he had often heard : he was the gayest and wild-
 
 104 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 est young officer of the garrison. Clara, the be- 
 loved of this man ! This thought had occupied 
 him day and night ever since Benjamin's illness ; 
 thinking of her horrid fate had driven every thing 
 else out of his mind. But his heart-sore was 
 soon to be healed ; and he now turned his whole 
 attention to considering what was best to be 
 done, to comfort and restore the poor old man to 
 health again. 
 
 Clara, however, did not consider herself poor. 
 No; rich beyond measure, she loved and was 
 beloved yes, loved by a man of rank and prop- 
 erty ! How handsome, how fine, and gallant in 
 his manners was her Count ! He hung upon her 
 very looks she could actually govern him! 
 When her mistress's son gave her up so suddenly, 
 she was, as already intimated, very miserable, 
 but she did not give herself up to despair. She 
 soon looked round for comfort her heart had 
 become accustomed to these foolish fancies, and 
 she was no longer happy without an intrigue on 
 hand. In this disposition she received the first
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 105 
 
 letter from Count Briindel. "With real delight 
 did she respond to his advances ; her excited feel- 
 ings were no longer governed by the same pru- 
 dent calculation, as in the case of the medical 
 student ; she believed that this time she must try 
 another plan, and had the firm conviction that 
 she must succeed. 
 
 Four weeks had passed over in this sweet in- 
 toxication. Mrs. Krauter had no pangs of con- 
 science about encouraging the intercourse of the 
 young people. The Count usually had a well- 
 filled purse : she wanted for nothing, and led a 
 delightful life ; and, besides, he had promised to 
 marry Clara, and both mother and daughter 
 were fools enough to believe him. Yes ; Clara 
 had even laid aside all her cleverness and cun- 
 ning in this benumbing of her senses ! She 
 thought not of the future she would not re- 
 member the past the present was so very sweet. 
 She had often been in the theater with her 
 Count, and he had promised to bring her to a 
 fancy-ball that was to be given in that locality.
 
 106 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 That to her seemed the very summit of earthly 
 pleasures. For fourteen days before, she had 
 studied all the books of fashions, rummaged all 
 the shops where masquerade dresses were to be 
 hired. At last she decided on going as Diana ; 
 but for this costume a green velvet scarf or 
 mantle was absolutely necessary, and it would 
 be so suitable to her slight figure. But where 
 was the money to come from to purchase it? 
 Their purses were all at low ebb : the mother 
 had given sundry hints to the Count, to which, 
 however, he had paid no attention for the best 
 of all reasons, because his funds did not happen 
 just then to be in a very flourishing condition. 
 Clara could not borrow from any one, and the 
 shops would no longer give her credit ; for she 
 had petty debts in most of them, besides owing 
 two dollars to Agusta Vogler. These debts did 
 not trouble her much ; she could have paid them 
 long ago, and would soon have plenty of money 
 again : it was but a temporary embarrassment. 
 She had long given up the idea of a real velvet
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 107 
 
 scarf; a mock one would serve the purpose 
 equally well, and that would cost but a few dol- 
 lars. 
 
 Whilst making plans to obtain this scarf, the 
 evil one led her constantly to think of the little 
 box full of money in her mistress's writing-table. 
 Steal ? no ! The very thought of it horrified 
 her. 'Tis true her mistress would never miss so 
 small a sum ; for she had often thought over her 
 household expenses with Clara, when she had 
 failed to note down some item or other, and if 
 the account could not be settled to her mind, she 
 easily satisfied herself that it was an oversight. 
 The idea of borrowing the trifling sum from her 
 mistress's money-box, recurred to her mind more 
 and more frequently as the time for the fancy- 
 ball approached. " For a few days at least, you 
 might take the money : then put it back again," 
 suggested the evil one ; and she did not with- 
 stand him. "What power had she within her, to 
 withstand temptation? Her cleverness; and it 
 was the only weapon she would use to shield
 
 108 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 herself from sin and destruction this very 
 cleverness it was which prompted her to the 
 step. You are only borrowing you do not 
 mean to steal the money, said cleverness ; no 
 one will know of it ; and the green velvet scarf 
 is absolutely necessary to secure you admiration. 
 The next morning she put in practice the 
 cunning trick with regard to the writing-table. 
 Her hand trembled as she grasped the money 
 from the box, and her heart palpitated fearfully. 
 But when she displayed the scarf to advantage 
 over her shoulders before her mother's looking- 
 glass in the evening, her heart beat no longer 
 from fear, but from pride and adoration of her 
 own grace and beauty. Yes ! and a few even- 
 ings after, as she flew through the giddy mazes 
 of the ball-room, leaning on the arm of the 
 young Count, hearing exclamations of admira- 
 tion at every step, and the Count congratulated 
 as a lucky fellow, at being the cavalier of a 
 pearl so fair, her conscience became altogether 
 silent. The Count gave her a little money in
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 109 
 
 the evening, for she confessed to him that she 
 had debts, as Agusta Vogler was becoming im- 
 patient to be paid. But first of all, she would 
 put back again that which she had taken from 
 her mistress : that was her firm intention. 
 
 However, as she rose later than usual the next 
 morning, she could not execute her intention, 
 and was obliged to put off taking the keys until 
 the morning after fatal delay. During the day 
 she considered the matter over again. Her mis- 
 tress had not observed any thing: she was as 
 kind and friendly toward her as ever ; from her 
 Clara had nothing to fear. She determined, 
 therefore, first, to pay off her small debts in the 
 shops, in order to obtain credit more easily when 
 she needed it. As she stood in the last shop 
 with the remains of her money, she discovered, 
 with alarm, that the sum was not sufficient to 
 cover the debt. And yet she had just been 
 boasting of her power to pay all she owed. The 
 foreman having made out her account, handed 
 it to her with the polite, but serious remark,
 
 110 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 that it was quite against the rules of the house 
 to give such large credit to ladies of her rank. 
 Clara's pride rose powerfully the sum must be 
 paid at all hazards; she, the future wife of a 
 Count, could not brook such an insult. She 
 took the account, and promised to be back in 
 a few moments. She went straight to Agusta 
 Yogler. Agusta must help her. She promised 
 faithfully to return it the next morning at ten 
 o'clock. Agusta was good-natured gave her 
 the money, but told her, at the same time, that 
 if she were not paid punctually at the time ap- 
 pointed, she would go and make a formal com- 
 plaint to her mistress. Clara went off' in tri- 
 umph to pay her bill, and remarked pertly, that 
 there were other shops where ladies of her rank 
 were served most willingly. 
 
 Then she went to her mother's, and wrote a 
 letter to the Count, which the old woman was to 
 deliver into his own hands as quickly as possible. 
 It was the first time that Clara had demanded 
 money: but necessity has no law; and this, her
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. Ill 
 
 first request, he surely could not refuse. With a 
 beating heart she awaited the return of her 
 mother. She, however, brought bad news : the 
 Count was not at home. Her mother promised 
 to continue going to his house until she should 
 see him, and, if possible, to procure the money 
 before ten o'clock the next day. The evening 
 and morning passed over, but her mother did 
 not come. At last she brought the news that 
 the Count had come home late at night, and 
 had gone off again somewhere very early in the 
 morning. 
 
 Clara was in despair. Agusta came for her 
 money, but was obliged to be contented with 
 many sacred promises of payment at ten o'clock 
 the next day. " Need breaks iron," thought 
 Clara. " To-morrow morning early I will take 
 the money out of the writing-table ; if she has 
 not remarked it once, I may venture still an- 
 other time : it will not be observed." The same 
 evening her mother went again to the Count. 
 He had not yet returned ; and Clara went to
 
 112 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 her work the next morning in a very bad humor. 
 This time she was bolder. She had taken nearly 
 three dollars, and was in the act of locking the 
 writing-table, as the door opened behind her, 
 and her mistress stepped in. Clara screamed 
 aloud. " So ! " said the old lady. Clara held 
 both her hands before her face her senses 
 seemed to leave her. 
 
 " Clara ! " said the old lady, " it is now eight 
 days since I observed that some one had been at 
 my money-box ; but as I was not quite sure of 
 it, I said nothing about it, and you are the very 
 last person I would have suspected of being the 
 thief." 
 
 " Thief!" sobbed Clara; "I never intended to 
 steal. I would have put all the money back 
 again." 
 
 " Foolish reasoning that ! " replied her mis- 
 tress, angrily. " You have stolen, and in the 
 most abominable manner taken advantage of 
 the confidence which I placed in you ; and noth- 
 ing can now save you from a public trial, unless
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 113 
 
 you confess the whole truth to me, and your 
 reasons for the crime. And, above all, I must 
 now make strict inquiries about your conduct 
 and manner of living ; for very strange reports 
 have been going abroad about you for the last 
 few weeks." 
 
 Clara was in a most awful predicament ! All 
 pride and self-conceit had disappeared. Sin 
 makes one cowardly fear was treading upon 
 her heels. It was fear that so completely cut up 
 Clara's whole being. She thought of her love 
 for the Count ; it was her foolish love for him 
 that had made a thief of her she thought of 
 her friends, of her Aunt Rieka. Yes ; she con- 
 fessed, she described her exalted love for the 
 Count. " If he had not been on a journey, I 
 would not have taken the money: indeed, on 
 the contrar} T , I would have put back the sum 
 which I had already taken. His love is so great 
 for me : all that belongs to him is mine ; yes, he 
 has even promised to marry me ! " 
 
 Her mistress replied that she was a poor de- 
 
 8
 
 114 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 ceived girl ; but that such was the fate of all the 
 light-minded and frivolous. "And even were 
 the Count fool enough to marry you, how would 
 he be considered by the officers of his regiment ? 
 How would a girl like you be received in society?" 
 
 At these words, Clara stared at the speaker. 
 " A girl like me ? " asked she softly. 
 
 " Yes, like you?" repeated the old lady. 
 "You have been seen walking in the streets 
 after dark you are talked of in the town as a 
 giddy coquette, and the young Count is not your 
 first love." 
 
 Clara reddened. Did her mistress then know 
 about the medical student ? or was she only try- 
 ing to find out the whole truth ? At any other 
 time she would have stoutly denied all the 
 charges now, however, fear ruled her; there- 
 fore to this charge she preserved silence, and 
 to beganbeg Madame von Trautstein's forgive- 
 ness for the fault, as she called the taking of the 
 money. 
 
 Madame von Trautstein gave her a long lee-
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 115 
 
 ture : represented to her the misery she was 
 bringing upon herself by her present mode of 
 life ; and drew a picture of the future, very dif- 
 ferent from that painted by Clara's imagination 
 for herself. But, at the same time, the kind con- 
 siderate lady promised not to say a word of the 
 affair to any one, and also to keep Clara quietly 
 in her service till Easter. And as she would, 
 perhaps, be too weak of herself to break off the 
 connection with the Count, it shall come from his 
 side, " for," said the old lady, " I shall take care 
 that he shall know to what a pitch of folly and 
 crime his levity has brought a poor unfortunate 
 girl. He shall learn that, in order to adorn her- 
 self to please him, she has stooped to steal ! " 
 
 These last words brought Clara almost to the 
 verge of distraction ! She entreated she begged 
 but in vain ; her mistress remained firm to her 
 determination, and Clara was obliged to leave 
 the room in despair. The first thing, however, 
 which she did, was to sit down and write to the 
 Count herself. She described to him her misery,
 
 116 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 her love, her despair, if lie should desert her. 
 She bathed the letter with tears, so that the 
 writing was scarcely legible, and just as she had 
 sealed it, her mother came in. 
 
 " You are like an angel from heaven ! " said 
 Clara ; " you must go and carry this letter to the 
 Count!" 
 
 " It is not necessary," said the mother, smiling, 
 " I have the money already." 
 
 " Oh ! " stammered Clara ; " then it was not 
 necessary ! " She covered her face with her 
 hands, and wept bitterly. If she had waited but 
 one hour, then all this misfortune would not have 
 happened to her ! 
 
 The mother was at her wit's end about the dis- 
 tress of her daughter : she inquired, she comfort- 
 ed, she related how that, late yesterday evening, 
 she had gone to the Count, and not finding him 
 at home, had gone back to him early this morn- 
 ing and found him in bed, and made him hand 
 out the money. He grumbled a little (added the
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 117 
 
 mother), and said that their demands were more 
 than he could afford. 
 
 " Did he say that ? " answered Clara, with pas- 
 sion. " take him back his money, and my let- 
 ter along with it ; and tell him that I desire 
 nothing more than his love, and that he shall 
 answer me immediately. But go quickly, moth- 
 er, and come quickly back again." 
 
 Her mother could not understand a word of 
 all this : she shook her head, for she knew that 
 Agusta Vogler would come back to look for 
 her money, and that she would make a fine 
 noise if she got none. She tried to talk over 
 her daughter. " You lovers," said she, " you 
 quarrel and make needless misery for yourselves. 
 Do you quietly take the money, pay your debt, 
 and I will invite him to come in the evening, 
 and you can again be friends together. Clara, 
 do not let love blind you ! The gay young 
 Count will slip away from you some day, just as 
 the young lawyer did from me." 
 
 Clara would have made an angry unbelieving
 
 118 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 reply, but some one tapped at the door. "Agus- 
 ta ! " said she faintl}*, and glanced unwillingly at 
 the money in her mother's hand. 
 
 " Shall I pay her ? " said the latter. 
 
 " Yes," replied Clara, sighing, " pay her ! pay 
 her! but go outside the door, and tell her I 
 am ill." 
 
 The mother did as she was asked, and the af- 
 fair was soon settled. Now the only thing to be 
 done was to take Clara's letter to the Count. She 
 promised not to come back without an answer, 
 but was obliged to do so, notwithstanding Clara's 
 anxiety; for the Count was on duty, and Mrs. 
 Krauter was requested to return in the afternoon. 
 Clara passed some hours of misery : she had 
 lain down upon her bed, in order to avoid seeing 
 any one. Here she listened to every footstep 
 upon the stairs. She imagined the most extra- 
 ordinary things to herself. When he would read 
 her letter, his heart would melt he would not be 
 able to think of her misfortune he would come 
 himself to her he would brave the world her
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 119 
 
 mistress and would himself comfort her, and 
 help her out of this confusion. But how did 
 she feel when her mother came to her in the 
 twilight with the cold answer ! The Count was 
 very angry ; he had spoken of a second letter, of 
 very great want of foresight, and of almost in- 
 sufferable annoyances : he must think over the 
 affair, and the next day he would send his an- 
 swer. That was a death-blow to Clara ! She 
 felt in such a night of misfortune, that she could 
 not even think she could only feel that her hap- 
 piness with the Count was at an end. She re- 
 mained in [bed the next morning ; for she could 
 do nothing but weep, and could not endure wit- 
 nesses to her grief. Sometimes she had a faint 
 glimmering of hope ; her mother might still 
 bring a letter of comfort she looked back a few 
 days when his love was so sincere, his promises 
 of eternal fidelity so sacred ; but she did not 
 consider that these endearments are but tempta- 
 tions of the evil one, which, like soap-bubbles, 
 are blown away and forgotten. She belonged to
 
 120 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 the thousands of foolish young women who put 
 faith in such promises. 
 
 However, she was not left long in uncertainty. 
 Her mother came with the letter, and it was 
 written like a thousand others on similar occa- 
 sions. It still contained assurances of the warm- 
 est affection, but one must succumb to necessity, 
 duty, and honor, even should one's heart be 
 lacerated in the struggle. Clara read and wept ; 
 and wept and read again ; and remained the en- 
 tire day in bed. She had sufficient sense remain- 
 ing to keep for herself the largest half of the 
 gold-pieces sent by the Count, and only gave the 
 smaller portion to her mother.
 
 CHAPTER vi. 
 
 MARCH had come, the snow was melted, and 
 the warm spring sun shone upon the busy 
 streets. Clara had not been out of the house for 
 fourteen days : she made the excuse of being ill, 
 but, in reality, she feared to meet any of her ac- 
 quaintances, especially her Aunt Rieka. In the 
 mean time, her mother was obliged to acquaint 
 her aunt with the intention of leaving her situa- 
 tion, and to give as a reason that so much sitting 
 over her sewing did not agree with her health ; 
 and, therefore, she had been looking for an- 
 other service where she would have more exer- 
 cise. 
 
 One day Clara was out on an errand for her 
 mistress. It was a fine sunny day, the children
 
 122 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 were playing merrily in the streets, and she 
 heard the sound of a military band from the pa- 
 rade-ground. But she felt sad and exasperated 
 the very happiness and gayety of all around was 
 disagreeable to her ; and it was still more disa- 
 greeable to her to see her Aunt Bleka approach- 
 ing: she could not avoid her, therefore she had 
 to prepare herself for a serious conversation. 
 Her aunt, however, was not so bad as she 
 feared. 
 
 " You look very pale," said she to her, with 
 sympathy ; " you must have been very ill." 
 
 Clara explained as well as she was able, and 
 added, " that the new service in the Hotel Rein- 
 hard would be more suitable for her." 
 
 " But a hotel ! " said her aunt. 
 
 " I shall have nothing to do with the serving 
 in the hotel," replied Clara. " I am to be the 
 housekeeper have the care of the coffee, sugar, 
 and house-linen, and send the breakfast to the 
 rooms ; and for this I shall receive nine pounds,
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 123 
 
 and many presents besides." She found no 
 difficulty in tranquilizing her aunt. 
 
 Thus conversing together they reached Mrs. 
 Beudler's house, and Clara was obliged to go 
 in. Gretta stood in the room winding yarn 
 from her spinning-wheel. ""What a tiresome 
 job is this, when the sun is shining so brightly, 
 and all nature seems to invite one into the fresh 
 air ! " said she ; " but this is the last one, and we 
 shall make an end of spinning." Saying these 
 words she bent over a flower-pot of blooming 
 snow-drops, as if the very sight of them gave 
 her new strength to work. 
 
 " From whom have you received those beauti- 
 ful flowers?" asked Clara. 
 
 "From Benjamin," replied Gretta, and blush- 
 ed; for she knew that Fritz Buchstein had 
 planted them : and it was that which enhanced 
 their value in her eyes. 
 
 " Benjamin is now well again : he reared them 
 in his room ; and, when they flowered, he was 
 kind enough to present them to me. Only look
 
 124 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 at the white blossoms how pure and tender 
 they are, and how modestly they bend their 
 heads. I know of no flower that I prefer to the 
 snow-drop ; and Benjamin could not have given 
 me a greater pleasure." 
 
 Clara agreed with her, as far as words went ; 
 but her heart was sad she could not take pleas- 
 ure in flowers. 
 
 "Now I have finished !" said Gretta, joyfully: 
 "Come, Clara, and help me to sow peas and 
 salad. It is such a pleasure to have every thing 
 early in the season." She put on her garden- 
 bonnet, took the seeds, and preceded her mother 
 and Clara. The sky was light-blue white 
 spring clouds passed over it ; the earth was fresh 
 and brown ; the violets began to open their silk- 
 en leaves; the gooseberry bushes had a green 
 shade; the birds were singing, the sparrows 
 twittering, and the doves cooing, on the house- 
 tops ; and in the neighbors' gardens they were 
 working and singing: all nature seemed alive. 
 Benjamin also looked out of his window, with
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 125 
 
 the starling upon his shoulder, which kept cry- 
 ing, " Miss Gretta so right ! " Gretta answered, 
 " That he should keep silent ; for his ugly voice 
 did not suit the spring." Benjamin, however, 
 whispered something to the bird, and it im- 
 mediately commenced screaming, " Rascal ! 
 rogue ! " at such a rate that even Fritz Buch- 
 stein opened his workshop-window, and begged 
 for quietness. He also came into the garden, 
 and looked over the paling at Gretta sowing her 
 seed. Clara being there was also an attraction to 
 him ; he was no longer bashful before her. No ; 
 the Lord had heard his prayer, and given him 
 peace in his heart : he only felt a pitying sym- 
 pathy now for the poor unfortunate girl. Her 
 love affair with the Count was pretty well 
 known to him. If her misfortunes would only 
 have the effect of making her repent ! thought 
 he : her paleness and quietness gave him hopes 
 for her. 
 
 But Gretta did not leave him long to these 
 thoughts: she was so fresh and so lively, his
 
 126 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 heart rejoiced over her. As Benjamin was 
 laughing at the crooked furrows she was 
 digging to sow her peas in, Fritz jumped over 
 the paling, and took upon himself the office of 
 marking the lines for the pea-furrows. Mrs. 
 Bendler stood by, quite happy ; and old Buch- 
 stein, who stood leaning on his staff, enjoying 
 the warm spring sunshine, seemed to warm him- 
 self still more, looking at his happy son by the 
 side of the good Gretta. 
 
 Clara was utterly miserable between this 
 happy pair. Fritz Buchstein loves Gretta 
 that is all right : Gretta looks almost pretty to- 
 day. And Fritz ! she had long ago thought 
 him too good for Gretta. In this disposition 
 she almost repented having treated Fritz so 
 scornfully. That he had first loved her, she felt 
 too certain; and now, that the good fortune 
 which she had planned for herself with the great 
 world had failed, she could have accepted a 
 Fritz, with his comfortable little freehold, and 
 money-making trade. Of course, in order to
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 127 
 
 possess such a husband, she must become a 
 pious, industrious, orderly girl, like Gretta, 
 whispered an inward voice to her: conscience 
 was roused ; tears flowed over her pale cheeks.
 
 CHAPTER VII. 
 
 1 FEW months more had passed over ; the 
 xl. summer was splendid. Gretta took great 
 delight in her trees, her flowers, particularly her 
 roses. Fritz had also planted, and sowed flow- 
 ers, that all looked gay together. Old Ben- 
 jamin took great pleasure in quizzing the young 
 people in many ways ; but after a fine warm 
 summer rain, they were very much surprised to 
 see an F and a G entwined together, growing up 
 in fresh green cress. He taught his starling a 
 new sentence, and his bullfinch sang more beau- 
 tifully than ever: " Bless the Lord, my soul ! " 
 Clara's tears "were also dried up ; the bloom 
 had returned to her cheeks. The hotel-life 
 pleased her mightily. She was admired and
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 129 
 
 flattered by the strangers who came and went. 
 She knew well that this would have no influ- 
 ence on her future life for they were only 
 strangers, who, after a few days, would be away 
 again, and merely wished to amuse themselves. 
 She was, therefore, very retiring in her manner, 
 and, above all things, would not have any thing 
 whatever to do with men of rank. Her fancy 
 had descended from the heights of romance to 
 the realities of life. Now, her desires were lim- 
 ited to a small dwelling, provided the man, 
 whom she would select for a husband, had an 
 affectionate heart, and a little education. And 
 such a man she soon found. He was the head- 
 waiter of the hotel. His education was blame- 
 less he spoke English and French always 
 went dressed in a black coat and white cravat ; 
 and he had something particularly fine and 
 gentleman-like in his manners. It happened 
 very well for Mr. Edward that she had already 
 suffered shipwreck in her love affairs, for he was 
 not long kept in suspense. Naturally, he had
 
 130 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 fully explained his position to her before she 
 committed herself. They might marry at once, 
 as he had saved a considerable sum, and his 
 wages were very high ; but he was striving after 
 a hotel of his own. His experience, and the 
 number of friends he had, would make it an 
 easy matter for him to conduct such an establish- 
 ment ; indeed, he had been making inquiries al- 
 ready for a suitable locality. He depicted a 
 glorious future to Clara. She, as mistress of the 
 hotel, would lead the life of a princess ; could 
 rule and regulate just as she pleased. Poor 
 Clara had completely forgotten the past, and 
 stepped forward again most courageously and 
 self-contented, in her plans for the future. The 
 tenth of August, Clara's birthday, was the one 
 fixed on for the public betrothal. The bride- 
 groom had presented her with a rose-colored satin 
 bonnet, and black satin mantilla for the occasion. 
 Both lay upon the sofa in her room, beside a 
 real cambric handkerchief and lemon-colored 
 kid-gloves. It was the evening before the
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 131 
 
 eventful day that was to seal her fate for life ; 
 she was sitting thinking over various matters in 
 the dark, for it was already late, when through 
 the chink of her half-opened door, she heard 
 voices whispering in the corridor. " So he will 
 have tea : make it then ! He is drunk ; hut has 
 still that much sense left to know what is the 
 matter with him, and what will do him good." 
 
 " He is a well-seasoned cask ! " answered the 
 other voice ; " any other decent man would he 
 drunk the entire day, if he took as much liquor 
 as that man contrives to swallow." 
 
 " And he is an arch rogue besides," said the 
 first voice : " he pockets at least a hundred dol- 
 lars every month, and the old ass does not ob- 
 serve it, but confides in him as if he were his 
 most faithful friend." 
 
 The voices died away in the distance. Clara 
 was quite excited. Whom could they mean? 
 "Who was the rogue and drunkard ? A horrible 
 presentiment took possession of her mind. Could 
 it be her Edward ? Several times already had
 
 132 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 she found the smell of wine or spirits on him ; 
 and when she rebuked him about it, he merely 
 laughed, and said, he would be a bad hotel- 
 waiter if he did not taste the wine now and 
 then, adding, that with the heavy duties he had 
 upon his shoulders, it was absolutely necessary 
 at times for him to take a drop to strengthen 
 him. But Clara had never observed the slight- 
 est approach to drunkenness ; therefore, she be- 
 gan to console herself that the speakers could 
 not possibly mean him. And the accusation of 
 roguery ! that, of course, could not be meant 
 for her bridegroom, for he both spoke and acted 
 so nobly. Sometimes, indeed, there was a mix- 
 ture of levity in his conversation ; and of his 
 former life, or his moral state, she knew and in- 
 quired nothing. Thereupon her conscience re- 
 minded her that her own conduct with regard 
 to morality and honesty had not been too strict ; 
 even though it was hidden from the world. 
 This, that people knew of it that two waiters
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 133 
 
 could talk about it, was the most disagreeable 
 part of the whole affair. 
 
 Determined to learn the grounds of this con- 
 versation, and remove all doubts from her mind, 
 she left the room. 
 
 In passing, she turned the handle of her 
 bridegroom's chamber: that was locked. She 
 went into the saloon : he was not there. Then 
 she went into the kitchen, and inquired for 
 whom the tea was making? "For Mr. Ed- 
 ward," replied the cook, quite frankly. The 
 waiter, who was standing with the cup and tray, 
 winked most expressively to the cook, at these 
 words. 
 
 Clara was obliged to put very great restraint 
 upon her feelings, in order to hide her emotion : 
 she could find no rest that night. How dread- 
 ful if he is a drunkard ! She remembered how 
 very miserable her own father had made her 
 mother, through drink ; and there were living 
 examples enough on all sides to deter the 
 stoutest heart. Even old Yogler, who usually
 
 134 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 let the women do as they liked in the house, 
 when he came home drunk, thought very little 
 of beating his sick wife and beloved daughter. 
 Drink is a horrible curse it reduces a human 
 being below the level of the brutes. And how 
 shall it be with the hotel? Are his promises 
 and protestations true ? All these thoughts and 
 fears tormented Clara during the wakeful hours 
 of that long night, and, strange to say, when 
 she did drop asleep, Fritz Buchstein and her 
 Aunt Rieka stood beside her, with their serious 
 faces and reproving words; so that her very 
 dreams were uneasy. If the great and just God, 
 of whom they talk so much, should be about to 
 punish her for her levity and wickedness if 
 her aunt's proverb should at last turn out to 
 be true " As you sow, you shall reap ? " But 
 what was she to do now? Withdraw from 
 her engagement ! that would be impossible : she 
 would lose her good name, and all hope o*f 
 establishing herself for the future. And besides, 
 Edward would not give her up : he loves her so
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 135 
 
 well, and she loves him too much. Yes ! that 
 is her consolation. This love must improve 
 him, even should he have grave faults. Oh, 
 how elevating is the thought ! He is so soft so 
 yielding ; she can turn him round her finger : 
 his affection is so strong ; he will do every thing 
 for her she will make quite a pattern husband 
 of him ! This thought has already made many 
 an unfortunate wife. She will improve him 
 she will change him ! she trusts far too much to 
 her own strength. Such love has never yet 
 changed any man ; and the more feebly he gives 
 himself up now to the government of his pas- 
 sion for her, so much the more feebly will he re- 
 turn to his former sins when the novelty will be 
 worn off. In order to change a man, another 
 power is needed; even the power from on high. 
 Clara, however, had consoled herself with 
 these thoughts ; and as Edward appeared before 
 her the next morning with his usual grace and 
 activity, she again took courage. But she was 
 determined to acquaint him with the whispered
 
 136 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 conversation she had heard it would be a good 
 warning to him for the future ; and besides, she 
 obtained a sort of power over him, by knowing 
 his faults. She related it, however, in such a 
 manner as if she believed it utterly impossible 
 for him to be guilty of the like ; but she took 
 care to relate every word which she had over- 
 heard. Edward was very much confused, and 
 as red as fire ; but he covered his confusion by 
 a torrent of angry words; he would make a 
 complaint of the fellow he would find means 
 to stop his envious tongue, etc., etc. But he 
 was really very glad that Clara could not name 
 the speakers, because a serious examination just 
 then would have been most disagreeable to him 
 for many reasons. The accusation of drunken- 
 ness he explained away, by telling Clara, that 
 he had been drawing off wine, and that the 
 cold air of the cellar, after the close air of the 
 crowded saloon, had affected him so much that 
 he had become light-headed and faint. Oh, 
 how well he acted the enraged man, who was
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 137 
 
 falsely accused so well, that Clara had to use 
 the sweetest words in order to pacify him ; but 
 he allowed himself to be pacified, and both par- 
 ties crushed their mutual feelings of fear and 
 anxiety with affectionate words. 
 
 Toward noon, they walked to her Aunt 
 Rieka's, and Clara had the pleasure of seeing 
 every one staring after her truly a handsome 
 pair! He looked at least like a baronet, and 
 she not less fine. 
 
 What will the home-bred Gretta say ? Fritz 
 Buchstein? Gretta will be stupidly embarrass- 
 ed before the grand gentleman, and Aunt Rieka 
 will make a very low courtesy. 
 
 But she deceived herself greatly. Aunt Rieka 
 was certainly very much astonished to see Clara 
 hanging on the arm of a strange man ; and, 
 when she introduced him as her bridegroom, 
 looked very serious indeed. Gretta examined 
 him earnestly, and then looked at him very 
 angrily. He appeared very much put out of 
 countenance at these looks, and turned away.
 
 138 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 Clara observed all this, and could not under- 
 stand what it meant. Her aunt was the first to 
 break this painful silence. 
 
 " Clara, I did think you would have placed 
 more confidence in us on such an important oc- 
 casion," said she, with a slight tone of reproach. 
 
 Clara excused herself by saying, " The whole 
 affair came on so quickly, that I was myself sur- 
 prised." The bridegroom had by this time re- 
 covered himself, and now acted the offended 
 guest. 
 
 " I hope that you have nothing to say against 
 me," said he, angrily ; " and that I shall be a 
 welcome nephew to you ? My position is such, 
 that I feel no hesitation in offering myself to 
 your niece." 
 
 " I beg your pardon, Mr. Giinther," replied 
 the aunt, quietly ; " I merely wished that Clara 
 had placed more confidence in me, her near 
 relative. I can have nothing at all against you 
 personally, for you are altogether unknown to
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 139 
 
 me ; as neither myself nor my daughter have 
 ever heard your name." 
 
 "I know the gentleman well," answered 
 Gretta, softly, hut with a slight accent upon 
 her words. 
 
 "I was not aware of the acquaintance," 
 stammered Edward : " perhaps in passing per- 
 haps in the theater, or a coffee-garden ! " 
 
 Gretta shook her head, and remained silent. 
 Edward passed this over lightly, and began a 
 sort of lively conversation, which, however, he 
 had to sustain for the most part himself, as 
 Aunt Eieka and the two girls were rather 
 silent. At length, to the great relief of all par- 
 ties, the visit drew to an end. 
 
 Once upon the street, Edward could no longer 
 contain his rage. " You must promise me this," 
 said he angrily to Clara, " to have nothing more 
 to do with those people ! I cannot allow you to 
 associate with such low vulgar relations, whose 
 manners are so rough. They have treated me 
 shamefully ; and what that goose Gretta means,
 
 140 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 or what she has against me, I cannot under- 
 stand!" 
 
 Clara was confounded : she scarcely knew 
 where she stood. Where was the grand triumph 
 which she had expected ! She plainly felt that 
 she was rather pitied and envied by Gretta for 
 which there must be some hidden reason ; and it 
 was actually horrible to her, that her aunt had 
 shown so very little pleasure or admiration for 
 herjine gentleman bridegroom. She felt ready to 
 weep, and yet was obliged to restrain her own 
 feelings, in order to pacify her enraged bride- 
 groom. 
 
 That happened to be a very busy day in the 
 hotel, so that the bridal pair had found little or 
 no time for explanations, which pleased Clara 
 very much. She only waited a suitable time to 
 go to her aunt's, and inquire what it was they 
 had against Edward; and when he was occupied 
 in attendance on the crowded dinner-tables, she 
 executed her intention. Her aunt and Gretta 
 were sitting quietly in the little parlor. She
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 141 
 
 hardly knew how to begin her interrogations ; 
 but at last summoned courage, and asked them 
 if they knew any thing to the discredit of her 
 bridegroom ? Gretta hung her head, and seem- 
 ed unwilling to answer. 
 
 " Clara," began her aunt, " first of all, you 
 must fully understand that we have nothing but 
 your good at heart ; " and taking Clara's hand, 
 she looked most affectionately into her face. 
 
 Clara was a light-minded girl, but she had 
 still some feeling left for the voice of truth ; and 
 returning the pressure of her aunt's hand, she 
 replied, "I do believe you." 
 
 Aunt Rieka inquired: "Are you intimately 
 acquainted with your bridegroom?" 
 
 " I know him since I have been in the hotel," 
 answered Clara. " I know, also, that he is the 
 master of the house, and that he is the support 
 of the entire business, for the old man leaves all 
 in his hands; and he intends very shortly to 
 open a hotel of his own. He has connections, 
 property, and is besides well educated has
 
 142 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 most polished manners, and is universally liked 
 by all who come in and out of the hotel." 
 
 " That is all very well," replied her aunt ; 
 "but these are after all mere outward attrac- 
 tions, and he might, in spite of them all, render 
 you most unhappy. Do you know whether he 
 is a brave upright man : one who will fear God 
 more than men?" 
 
 " Of course, I hope he is an upright man, and 
 I have no reason to believe otherwise ; and if 
 you or Gretta know any thing bad of him, it is 
 your duty to acquaint me at once." 
 
 These words pleased her aunt ; she thought 
 Clara was most anxious about the probity and 
 uprightness of her bridegroom ; but it was only 
 burning curiosity to hear what it was they had 
 against him. Her pride was humbled : she felt 
 angry with herself, and with all the world be- 
 side. 
 
 "I will now relate to you what we know 
 about your bridegroom," said her aunt, "and 
 then you can consider what your best course of
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 143 
 
 action will be under the circumstances. The 
 winter before last, when I was lying ill of fever, 
 Gretta had to take my turn and visit many sick 
 poor women. The most hopeless and miserable 
 of our patients was a poor girl, who had had a 
 baby about three months previously, and, at the 
 time I speak of, was lying ill of consumption. 
 So very poor and forsaken was she, that our so- 
 ciety, with its other burthens, could scarcely af- 
 ford to provide the poor creature the actual nec- 
 essaries of which she w r as destitute. But she had 
 not only poverty to contend with, she had a 
 gnawing inward grief: she spoke much about the 
 father of her child, what he had promised to do 
 for her, and how that he left her now to die of 
 hunger and want. Gretta had often to listen to 
 her complaints about that man, and her opinion 
 and description of him were certainly not very 
 high. As. the poor girl grew worse, and saw 
 death approaching with rapid strides, her most 
 ardent desire was to see her beloved, as sometimes 
 she still called him, once more before she closed
 
 144 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 her eyes on this world forever. A woman, who 
 had formerly acted as messenger between the lov- 
 ers, was sent again and again to ask him to come 
 to see the poor girl once more : but in vain. One 
 day Gretta went to see her, and found her par- 
 ticularly low and weak. She tried to encourage 
 her with a few comforting words, but she would 
 not be comforted : her only answer was, ' I must 
 see Giinther once more ! ' Gretta had never 
 heard the man's name, and had always avoided 
 as much as possible talking about the affair. 
 And while Gretta was talking to her of the folly 
 of clinging to a person who had so shamefully 
 deserted and cast her off: how she ought rather 
 to turn her desires and affections to her Savior, 
 who would never leave her nor forsake her : the 
 woman who had always been sent for Giinther 
 came in, exclaiming, * He is coming ! he is com- 
 ing!' Gretta turned quickly, in order to go 
 away ; but the man stood in the door-way before 
 she was aware of it. He stood by the bedside 
 of the sick girl, who turned toward him, and
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 145 
 
 said, 'I am dying now!' and wept bitterly. 
 ' That is not my fault,' answered he, harshly ; 
 ' and I have come to-day in order that the con- 
 stant running after me may cease. "What is it 
 you want? I have no time to stand here.' 
 ' You have left me to perish so miserably ! ' 
 sobbed the poor sick girl, again. * I ! ' cried he ; 
 and then recalled to her mind all he had ever 
 given her : it was no fault of his that she fell 
 sick ; she had relations who were richer than he 
 was why would she not turn to them for sup- 
 port now in her need ? ' The dying girl could 
 not speak for weeping : she tried to take his 
 hand, but he drew back. Gretta could stand 
 that no longer ; but stepping over to them, she 
 placed his hand in that of the invalid and said : 
 ' All these mutual reproaches are idle talk ; the 
 poor girl cannot live long now, and wished only 
 to hear a few words of afiection and comfort 
 from you, and not the hard cold language you 
 have been using.' He was quite startled ; for in 
 
 his haste to be done with his unfortunate victim, 
 10
 
 146 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 he had not observed Gretta's presence. He now 
 changed his manner of speaking to her, and, on 
 going away, left a little money : two days after 
 the girl died." 
 
 Her aunt ceased speaking. Clara was to the 
 highest degree excited. She could not speak ; 
 but pressing her aunt's hand warmly, rushed out 
 of the house. Her aunt called after, but she 
 heard her not : she ran home with hasty steps 
 and locked herself in her own room. Here she 
 burst into tears. What an abominable man, to 
 have had such an adventure ! She would break 
 oft' all connection with him at once ; she would 
 only have a man who was respected and honor- 
 ed by every one the man she would marry 
 must be greatly superior to Aunt Rieka and 
 Gretta in every thing. Such were her first 
 thoughts and intentions. However, when, af- 
 ter half an hour's violent weeping, she had 
 overcome her tears, she became more tranquil. 
 "And even should the entire story be true," 
 thought she, " where was the crime ? I might
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 147 
 
 easily have guessed that I was not his first love. 
 And besides," answered conscience, " he is not 
 your first love, and you have never confessed 
 your former adventures to him." That is just 
 the curse of sin : in order to cover her own 
 faults, she was obliged to overlook his, and thus 
 to bear the punishment of both. " That the girl 
 was silly enough to allow herself to be misled, 
 was her own fault ; it was very sad for her 
 and it was most shameful of him to leave her to 
 perish so miserably of want and hunger ; but 
 she must have been a very ordinary sort of girl 
 that could not fix his affections. Such a thing 
 could never have happened to me." The great- 
 est misfortune about the matter was, that it was 
 not a secret, and that her relations of all other 
 people should know so much about it. The af- 
 fair could by no means affect her fortune now, 
 as both mother and child were dead. WTien 
 she would once be mistress of a grand hotel, 
 with every comfort around her like any princess, 
 honored and adored by her husband, as she
 
 148 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 never doubted would be the case, what would 
 be wanting to her happiness? She must con- 
 sider well before she decided on giving up her 
 betrothed ; and besides, who could tell whether 
 the whole affair was so black as her aunt repre- 
 sented it to her? "My aunt sees every thing 
 with such jaundiced eyes, that I must not weigh 
 too heavily upon this story. But Edward shall 
 confess all to me he shall know that I am 
 aware of all his faults and follies, which will 
 make him more humble and more devoted to 
 me." 
 
 When he came, according to custom, after his 
 duties were over, to see her, he found her pretty 
 nearly consoled, although the sight of him made 
 her tears flow afresh. He was, with his bad 
 conscience, particularly tender-hearted, and 
 upon asking the reason of her weeping, was in- 
 formed of the whole history. Then his rage 
 seemed to exceed all bounds : He said it was all 
 abominable slander : and that Gretta and Aunt 
 Rieka were a malicious pair, who had turned
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 149 
 
 and twisted the whole affair in order to make 
 Clara hate him ! " "Who knows in what corner 
 they would wish to put you ; they are so jealous 
 that you are handsomer and more polished 
 in your manners than they are themselves." 
 About the sick girl he told her : that she had 
 been house-maid in the hotel, and that he had 
 had a trifling love affair with her ; that a little 
 later she had left the house, become loose in her 
 conduct, and thus sunk down to poverty and 
 misery. In her need she had turned to him, 
 and he had often given her assistance ; yes ! his 
 good nature had so far got the better of his 
 good sense that he did actually go once to see 
 the girl, because she let him have no rest. And 
 that is the wonderful history that your amiable 
 cousin has distorted in the manner you de- 
 scribe ! added he, with an angry voice. " You 
 must solemnly promise me to break off alFinter- 
 course with these abominable people, for they 
 are not only envious and wicked, but rough and 
 uncultivated in their manners, and are by no
 
 150 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 means suitable companions for us. I am very 
 well pleased that the cause for this rupture pro- 
 ceeds from them. Now we are quite free. Aft- 
 er the manner in which they have treated me, 
 they surely could never expect me to cross their 
 threshold again." 
 
 Then he began to relate his plans for the 
 future; which he painted in such vivid colors, 
 that Clara felt herself fully satisfied, and agreed 
 willingly to all his proposals. In order to avoid 
 all intrigues, they were to have their marriage 
 celebrated before winter, and not to wait for the 
 establishment of the hotel; that could be fully 
 arranged when they would be together. Giin- 
 ther had seen a nice little dwelling just opposite 
 the hotel, which would suit them nicely, and he 
 would purchase fine mahogany furniture; and 
 every possible luxury that money could produce 
 was to be laid at Clara's feet. She was to re- 
 ceive four hundred dollars yearly, without reck- 
 oning the numerous trifles here and there, which 
 fall naturally from the hotel. "When Clara in-
 
 ABOVE HER, STATION. 151 
 
 formed him that her aunt had promised her a 
 complete outfit in case she would marry, his 
 rage flamed up anew. 
 
 " We do not need any thing from your aunt ! 
 I shall write to her, and thank her both for her 
 slander and her wedding-presents ! I can stand 
 quite well, and give you every luxury without 
 any help from her. I shall never trouble her 
 again ; nor can I ever allow my wife to enter a 
 house where my honor has been so shamefully 
 attacked behind my back." 
 
 Clara made some opposition to this: for 
 though she had always more feared than loved 
 her aunt, she did not like to see her insulted in 
 this manner, as she had never reproved her but 
 with kindness, and a real desire to do her good. 
 Giinther promised not to make the letter too 
 severe ; " but," added he, " if we do not take 
 this opportunity of breaking loose from her, she 
 will plague us all our lives." In this way 
 Clara allowed herself to be talked over, and the 
 affair seemed all settled.
 
 152 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 The next evening Mrs. Krauter came with a 
 very serious countenance. Aunt Rieka had sent 
 for her, and told her the entire history, at the 
 same time giving her the letter to read which 
 Giinther had written to her in the morning. 
 Clara became hot and cold by the reading of 
 this letter, which was couched in terms as rude 
 and coarse as Giinther had determined upon 
 using when talking with Clara the last evening. 
 Mrs. Krauter had two faces : when she was with 
 her sister in the morning she lamented about the 
 levity and misfortunes of the world ; but with 
 her daughter she pursued a different language, 
 because she was desirous to see her married to 
 this man. Already had she received many a 
 tasty morsel from the hotel where her daughter 
 was servant ; and what a grand life might she 
 not expect to lead, when her daughter would be 
 mistress of her own hotel ! And when Clara 
 seemed disposed to be angry at her bridegroom 
 for his extreme rudeness to her aunt, her mother 
 took his part, saying, "Every man has his
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 153 
 
 faults; and she did not think Aunt Rieka 
 wholly free from blame. If you had taken any 
 other man, it would have been the same ; she 
 w T ould have still found faults in him : her taste 
 is not the same as yours, and you must now 
 hold with your bridegroom." Clara signed : it 
 must now be either for ! or against ! and as she 
 did not altogether like to give up her bride- 
 groom, she was obliged to go against her aunt. 
 She made her mother promise, however, to go 
 to her, and say how very unhappy she was 
 about the rudeness of her bridegroom's letter ; 
 but she was so very much attached to him, and 
 hoped so much good for him for the future, that 
 she must for the present agree to his wishes, and 
 break oft' all connection with her friends it 
 could not be for long, however, as he must very 
 soon become sensible of his error, and go of 
 himself to ask her aunt's pardon.
 
 CHAPTER vlli. 
 
 IT was the 25th of September ; Clara stood 
 before the glass, and putting on a pink apron, 
 with her white muslin morning-dress, and a 
 litle rose-colored head-dress, she was now ready 
 to receive her guests to chocolate-breakfast 
 (luncheon). She had been married the day be- 
 fore ; had gone in a carriage to church, in all 
 the pride and splendor of a white-satin dress, 
 and had been admired as a beautiful bride. 
 Mr. Reinhard had given his head-waiter a splen- 
 did dinner on his marriage-day ; and after this 
 dinner there was an evening party at the house 
 of the new married pair. The guests were : a 
 private secretary, with his wife, a shop-keeper 
 and his wife, a gentleman living on his rents,
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 155 
 
 Agusta Vogler, a few shopmen, and Clara's 
 mother. Clara confessed to herself that these 
 people did not seem at all to suit her fine apart- 
 ments and elegant furniture ; and even Giinther 
 was a changed person in this society. He laugh- 
 ed and spoke otherwise than she had been ac- 
 customed to see him do in the presence of the 
 fine folks who came to the hotel; indeed, his 
 whole air and manner became disagreeable to 
 her. Of course, she must make some allowance 
 for him, as he had taken an unusual quantity 
 of wine that day, which was not unfroquently 
 the case on such festal occasions: with this 
 thought she consoled herself. The same society 
 had been invited to luncheon this morning. 
 Clara had already prepared her fine china-cups ; 
 cakes and pasties were served up on painted 
 plates, and she herself reclined upon her sofa, 
 like any duchess awaiting the arrival of her 
 guests. 
 
 The mother was the first who came. She 
 glanced smilingly at the cakes and chocolate ;
 
 156 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 seated herself cosily at the opposite corner of 
 the sofa, and said : " I never could have be- 
 lieved that you would have so fully succeeded 
 in all your plans, you little giddypate. When I 
 thought over it, the chance of settling you seem- 
 ed so very far off, and then your hot blood and 
 your scruples would come in and spoil all. God 
 be praised that you have safely run into a good 
 harbor ! " 
 
 Clara smiled. She had at least her mother to 
 offer incense and rejoice at her lot, though she 
 could not altogether reconcile herself to her 
 wondrous good fortune. 
 
 Giinther came in a little paler than usual, but 
 in a good humor. The other guests soon fol- 
 lowed the chocolate was served Mrs. Krauter 
 seemed to enjoy every thing ; her son-in-law, on 
 the contrary, refused all these sweet things. He 
 said, jokingly, " I feel more inclined for wine to- 
 day than this sweet chocolate:" and leaving the 
 room, speedily returned with an armful of glass- 
 es and bottles. The gentlemen smirked at this
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 157 
 
 agreeable change, and the women made coarse 
 jests. Clara looked anxiously at her husband, 
 who had come over from the hotel in a slightly 
 elevated condition : for she had observed his 
 hands trembling when handing a cup of choco- 
 late. She would glady have put a stop to this 
 new drinking bout, but she felt ashamed to 
 speak : first, because she, as hostess, did not 
 like to seem to grudge her friends any good 
 cheer in the house, and then she knew well that 
 Gunther would not listen to any reasoning upon 
 such subjects. 
 
 The gentlemen became every moment more 
 noisy : the women looked on anxiously. Clara 
 observed that her husband had been for some 
 days very unwell, and that the wine would be 
 very bad for him. He became every moment 
 paler, his hands trembled, and he talked all 
 sorts of nonsense ; yet he was not the worst of 
 the company. One slept in the corner of the 
 sofa, while another of the young shopmen had 
 already left. The women tried to break up the
 
 158 ABOVE HER, STATION. 
 
 party, which, with the drunken men, was not 
 easily effected ; but at length they succeeded, 
 and Clara was left alone with her husband and 
 her mother. 
 
 Giinther had not quite drank his senses away, 
 because he could bear much more than most 
 men : he knew now that a sleep would do him 
 more good than any thing else, so he laid him- 
 self upon the bed. Mrs. Krauter went home, 
 because she had no inclination to wash up cups 
 and glasses, and Clara was left alone in her ele- 
 gant apartment; neither had she much desire 
 just then to wash up the cups and arrange the 
 room she wished first to recover from the noise 
 and tumult of the last few hours ; and, seating 
 herself in the window, gazed into the street. The 
 blue sky and clear sunshine invited promenaders 
 into the open air, and the coming and going of 
 carriages before the hotel made the prospect 
 quite lively to look at. Yes, gay and lively, but 
 not for Clara. Her heart was heavy, and she 
 scarcely knew what it was she wished for. She
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 159 
 
 was now at the very summit of her desires ; she 
 could live well, and act the grand lady. The 
 fine mahogany furniture, the sofa, the carpet, 
 the embroidered table-cloth, the flower-pots, the 
 handsomely-framed pictures she had never im- 
 agined a finer dwelling for herself and yet she 
 was not happy : this feeling vexed her so much, 
 she could have wept. Thus dissatisfied with 
 herself with the whole world she took up a 
 novel which was lying in her way to amuse her- 
 self and pass the time. 
 
 "When Giinther appeared again, after having 
 enjoyed a few hours' repose, he grumbled a little 
 at finding every thing in disorder ; and in his 
 diligence of waiter, he soon cleared away bottles 
 and glasses. Clara declared that she was quite 
 worn out, and his guilty conscience made him 
 keep silence; thus the honeymoon had not be- 
 gun with music and sunshine.
 
 CHAPTER IX. 
 
 T1KITZ BUCHSTEIK was walking up and 
 JL down the garden. The last rays of sunshine 
 were resting upon the slated-roof of the church- 
 tower, and a glorious autumn sunset gilded 
 the entire horizon. There were bright flowers 
 amongst the green leaves ; the plums and apples 
 hung heavily upon the branches ; in his neigh- 
 bor's garden a band of happy children danced 
 round a fire they had made of withered stalks : 
 all spoke of peace and plenty. Fritz gazed upon 
 the scene, and joy and contentment filled his 
 heart. Here was his sweet home ; here he was 
 to build his hearth ; here he hoped, in the love 
 and honor of God, to begin his course as citizen 
 and house-father.
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 161 
 
 Yesterday he had seen Clara married. Clara 
 in a white satin-dress, and green garland on her 
 head, with the heautiful blue childlike eyes, had 
 once more moved his heart to sympathy and 
 affectionate remembrances. The dark pale man 
 who stood beside her, seemed to him to be the 
 evil one, to whom she was about to give herself ; 
 and, as he saw her there, he prayed again and 
 again to the Almighty : " Lord, even now for- 
 sake her not : lead her, hold her ; Thou alone 
 art the way, and Thou alone hast the power to 
 preserve this poor wandering sheep from perdi- 
 tion." 
 
 On his way home he met Mrs. Bendler and 
 Gretta. At the sight of Gretla, happiness and 
 peace again entered his heart. Gretta looked 
 up at him so confidingly ; his eyes also expressed 
 the feelings of his heart. Marriages are made 
 in heaven. Gretta, he felt, was the wife intend- 
 ed by Providence for him. "With her he would 
 tread the narrow path ; his love should lead and 
 
 support her in all the temptations and difficul- 
 11
 
 162 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 ties of the way ; and her faithful stout heart 
 would bear him up with all his failings. Yes ; 
 he would confide to her affectionate heart the 
 sorrows and desires of his youth, now that he 
 had overcome them all, and could cast himself 
 with his whole heart on Gretta's affection : for 
 his love to her was founded upon esteem, and 
 their mutual love of God ; and such love is the 
 only sure foundation for married happiness. If 
 a girl has nothing more solid than a pretty face, 
 fine figure, or lively manners, the fit of admira- 
 tion soon wears oft', and, as is too often the case 
 with hastily-got-up marriages, she begins to feel 
 herself a neglected wife. Fritz looked with a 
 longing heart over his neighbor's paling, and 
 Gretta soon after came out of the house: she 
 shook a plumb-tree, and commenced gathering 
 the fruit. Fritz jumped over the paling, and 
 asked leave to help her ; which being granted, 
 they had soon collected the scattered fruit, and 
 filled Gretta's apron. Fritz then took Gretta's 
 hand, and looking earnestly at her, said : " Gret-
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 163 
 
 ta, you must have observed long ago the state of 
 my heart with regard to you ? " 
 
 Gretta nodded. 
 
 " I love you with all my heart," continued he, 
 " and the Lord will give me strength to make 
 you as happy as you deserve to be." 
 
 Gretta bent her head and thought : " I am in- 
 deed unworthy of such happiness." 
 
 "Kow we shall go to your mother," continued 
 he, and putting Gretta's arm in his, they passed 
 through the garden. Then a little window was 
 opened, and the starling hopped out and cried 
 aloud: "Miss is a bride!" Yes, you old Ben- 
 jamin, you must be the first to put your finger in 
 the pie. This time Gretta did not scold him for 
 his ugly voice ; but, smiling kindly at him, stood 
 still till the white night-cap with the friendly 
 face appeared at the window. " God bless you 
 both ! " said he fervently, then bending his head 
 to the bullfinch, the latter struck up his favorite 
 melody: "Praise the Lord, O my soul!" and 
 even Fritz and Gretta could not restrain them-
 
 164 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 selves, but with full clear voices, chimed in with 
 the words of a German hymn, the sense of 
 which is conveyed by those beautiful words of 
 the 103d Psalm : Bless the Lord, O my soul ! 
 and all that is within me, bless His holy name ! " 
 etc. 
 
 Mrs. Bendler came out just in time to join the 
 last line, and her tender affectionate heart could 
 not forbear shedding tears of joy on this happy 
 occasion. And when father Buchstein appeared 
 at his house-door, it was immediately settled to 
 open a gate in the paling between the two 
 gardens. Benjamin came quickly down, and 
 brought Fritz the necessary tools for cutting 
 down the paling, and with many lively speeches 
 they all helped at the work. During the time 
 that old Buchsteiu came slowly around leaning 
 on his staff, the opening was already made, and 
 Fritz led his bride and her mother to meet his 
 old father.
 
 CHAPTER X. 
 
 CLARA passed the remainder of her honey- 
 moon in unclouded pleasure. Gunther tried 
 to make her forget the first two days : He 
 brought her to coffee-gardens, concerts, the the- 
 ater, etc. She had nothing whatever to do in 
 the house, coffee and tea were the only things 
 she had to cook, and even these her mother was 
 glad to make for her, because she could then 
 take part in the feast. Mr. Reinhard allowed 
 Gunther to send Clara's dinner over to her, be- 
 cause one person, more or less, from the well- 
 covered table, made no difference to him ; and 
 Gunther appeared to be the more attentive and 
 obliging in the hotel. Clara now had plenty of 
 time for patching and mending; but, unfor-
 
 166 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 tunately, she wanted tlie inclination. She con- 
 sidered it useless trouble to mend up her old 
 things, and the small stock of new articles which 
 she provided for herself were all bought ready- 
 made. Gimther said he would make out the in- 
 ventory of articles needful to stock a grand 
 hotel as soon as he could spare time, but for the 
 present she could help herself with a few things 
 as their family was small. 
 
 Toward Christmas, she was not astonished to 
 observe that her husband stopped away oftener 
 than usual from home, because there were more 
 visitors at the hotel, and Giiiither was very busy; 
 and that his eyes looked hollow, and his hands 
 trembled, were indications of the hard work he 
 had to go through, and the hard life he had to 
 lead up early and late. And besides all this, 
 Gunther had such power over himself ! when he 
 thought any one was observing him, he could 
 assume such a steady gait, and such liveliness of 
 manner, that Clara was deceived and satisfied. 
 
 One evening toward ten o'clock, she was re-
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 167 
 
 turning from her mother's, who had been ill for 
 some days. In passing, she wished to get a little 
 money from him, for she could scarcely expect 
 to see him this evening ; there was so much life 
 and bustle about the hotel. In the hall she met 
 the young waiter who had made the tea for her 
 husband in the summer, and who had held that 
 famous whispered conversation which had then 
 startled Clara. 
 
 " Where is my husband ? " asked Clara. 
 
 " In his room ; and I must again make tea for 
 him," said the lad, mockingly. 
 
 Quite terrified, Clara ran to Giinther's room, 
 and found him in a worse condition than she 
 had ever before witnessed. He sat at a table, 
 which he thumped with his two fists, and 
 shouted out : " Ten thousand dollars five 
 thousand dollars that ought to suffice that 
 must suffice ! " Clara shut the door quickly aft- 
 er her. " For mercy's sake, Giinther ! " cried 
 she ; "you are quite drunk ! " 
 
 " Drunk ! " repeated Giinther, startled at the
 
 168 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 sight of her. He tried to compose himself as 
 usual, but it would not do : he sank down again 
 upon his chair and babbled nonsense. Some 
 one knocked at the door. Clara inquired who 
 it was? 
 
 "I bring the tea which I have made," answer- 
 ed the waiter ; " and Mr. Reinhard wishes to 
 speak to Mr. Edward." 
 
 Clara took the tea from the lad, then went 
 immediately to Mr. Reinhard, with whom she 
 exchanged a few words ; and he, seeming to be- 
 lieve the fable about Giinther's sudden attack 
 of illness, went away. Clara threw a cloak over 
 her husband's shoulders, put a hat on his head, 
 and when she found no one hanging about the 
 stairs, or the hall-door, led him to his home. 
 
 In her own dwelling, however, she tried to 
 overcome her fears and her rage by pouring a 
 torrent of abuse upon her husband. He stared 
 at her without answering a word. She became 
 more and more enraged, and insisted on his 
 getting into bed, and taking him by the arm
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 169 
 
 tried to force him to listen to her ; but he sud- 
 denly broke loose from her, and giving her a 
 severe blow, said roughly : " Be quiet with your 
 noise ! Who gave you liberty to preach to me ? 
 Here, pull off my boots ! " Clara stood stock 
 still ; she could not possibly stoop to such a 
 mean service ! " Are you going to be quick ! " 
 cried he, still more roughly, " or shall I teach 
 you to obey ? " Then stepping close up to her, 
 he shook her chin violently with his rough hand. 
 Clara screamed out. " Come ! " said he ; and 
 throwing himself upon a chair, stretched out his 
 foot again for her to pull off the boot. Clara 
 saw that it was no child's play with the drunken 
 man, and, bitterly weeping, she pulled off his 
 boots, in order to avoid further ill treatment. 
 He, bestowing a kick by way of thanks, turned 
 to the table and began again to thump with his 
 fists, and shout "Ten thousand dollars! ten 
 thousand dollars ! " till sleep put an end to his 
 nonsense. 
 
 Clara lay down in her clothes. She feared to
 
 170 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 go to sleep, for she dreaded being alone with 
 her husband. In her helplessness, weeping was 
 her only comfort : and she wept and wept, until 
 sleep at last overpowered her weary eyelids. 
 
 Toward morning she awoke, and heard her 
 husband groping about in the dark in the par- 
 lor, where he had passed the night in the cold. 
 She lighted a lamp: Giinther looked ashamed 
 of himself, but at the same time so ill and miser- 
 able, that she would have felt pity for him, had 
 not rage and grief restrained her feelings and, 
 besides, she felt weary and sick at heart after 
 the dreadful night she had passed. He will cer- 
 tainly, thought Clara, come and ask pardon, and 
 make excuses with sweet words ; but such con- 
 duct I will neither forget nor forgive I will tell 
 him that if any thing of the kind occurs again, 
 I shall leave him. As she went silently to the 
 stove to light the fire, he commenced speaking. 
 
 " Why did you leave me sitting here in the 
 cold room all night ? " 
 
 Clara gazed at him with astonishment. " Do
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 171 
 
 you know what happened yesterday evening ? " 
 asked she, with a trembling voice. 
 
 " Of course, I know it ! and bad enough it 
 was of a wife, when her husband came home 
 sick and weary, to attack him like a Zantippe. 
 You scolded and made a noise, instead of trying 
 to soothe and comfort him, as any other kind 
 wife would." 
 
 "Do you know that I brought you over?" 
 asked Clara, with trembling voice : " That Mr. 
 Reinhard wished to 'speak to you? that the 
 waiters despise you, because of your drunken- 
 ness ? and that it was I who brought you quietly 
 away from them all ? " 
 
 " I know all that ! " answered Giinther, coldly : 
 "and it was very sensible of you; but you ought 
 to have continued your kindness here." 
 
 Clara could not speak further : her voice was 
 choked with grief. Then he was not even sorry 
 for his bad deeds he even complained of her 
 conduct ! This was the first time that he had 
 spoken unkindly to her when he was in his sens-
 
 172 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 es ; now she must give up every hope of seeing 
 him change for the better. He went to bed she 
 attended him, and answered the messengers sent 
 about him from the hotel; but when her mother 
 came she had to hide her head for she would 
 have been ashamed to expose her misfortunes. 
 In spite of all her wisdom, cleverness, and pride, 
 she had just now fallen to the same condition as 
 her mother : the miserable, persecuted wife of a 
 drunken man ! 
 
 "When the young couple had passed eight 
 days in almost perfect silence, Giinther appeared 
 to give in : he brought Clara more money, began 
 to flatter her, and expressed some sorrow for his 
 conduct; and she thought it best not to ap- 
 pear too unforgiving. So that the intercourse 
 between them seemed outwardly to approach its 
 original footing; but the thorn remained in 
 Clara's heart: she could not possibly think 
 lightly of her lot now the reality was too 
 speakingly plain before her eyes. 
 
 Christmas arrived, and Giinther laid himself
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 173 
 
 out to win again for himself the entire of Clara's 
 easily moved heart. The Christmas table actu- 
 ally glittered with fine things: a silk mantle, 
 and a velvet bonnet, which would do for the 
 finest lady in the land, lay upon it, and, beside 
 other trifles, a bill for twenty dollars, to pur- 
 chase a baby's trousseau. For Clara's mother 
 Gunther had also bought many fine things : so 
 there w T ere only joyful faces to be seen on this 
 happy occasion. 
 
 Clara was determined to go to church on 
 Christmas morning, in order to display her new 
 finery. This triumph was quite a revival to her, 
 after the sad weary days she had passed; but 
 she was particularly anxious to show herself to 
 her Aunt Rieka and Gretta, as they had more 
 than once expressed their fears to her mother, 
 that she was not altogether so happy and com- 
 fortable as they could wish her to be : she would 
 now set their minds at rest about her. Of 
 course, she would be obliged to go to St. Steph- 
 en's Church, among the pietists; but that did
 
 174 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 not much signify, as, at all events, she was not 
 going to hear God's word. Yes; latterly she 
 avoided thinking of God more than ever ; al- 
 though the thought would force itself sometimes 
 upon her mind, that perhaps her aunt's words 
 might come true, and that God would punish 
 her for her unbelief. But this day all was joy 
 and happiness; so she had no time for such seri- 
 ous thoughts. 
 
 At first she had intended to seat herself in a 
 conspicuous part of the church, that every one 
 might see her ; but on entering God's house, her 
 better feelings conquered, and with a conscious 
 blush of shame she seated herself in a retired 
 corner. When the voices of the congregation, 
 mingled with the swelling tones of the organ, 
 were lifted up in one harmonious strain of 
 praise to that Redeemer, whose birth they had 
 that day assembled to commemorate, her heart 
 was moved with sensations till then unknown to 
 her : she forgot cloak and bonnet, and could not 
 resist reading and singing with great attention
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 175 
 
 the words : " He is Christ the Lord our God, 
 who from us all distress delivers," etc., etc. 
 
 A deliverer from all distress ! shall I also need 
 such a Savior, thought Clara. "Oh, how happy 
 I was before I married ! every succeeding day 
 clearer and more amusing than the last the 
 world so smiling. Why ! oh, why ! did I run 
 myself into such misfortunes ? And who knows 
 what miseries are still in store for me ? I have 
 no deliverer for my hour of need ! The Savior 
 whom Aunt Rieka and Gretta trust in is no 
 Savior for me ! I neither know Him, nor do I 
 wish to know Him ! " added she, despairingly. 
 The voice of the minister now drew her out of 
 her own thoughts. 
 
 " This is the day the Lord hath made ; let us 
 rejoice and he glad in it," was the text. The 
 gospel followed, and then how warmly the 
 preacher described the love of Jesus, who came 
 down from heaven with gifts from God for sinful 
 man, and what he requires from us. How great 
 and unspeakable is the grace of God for us poor
 
 176 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 sinners, who, naked and miserable, sit in dark- 
 ness and death, awaiting the righteous judgment 
 of an offended Deity for our manifold sins. Our 
 consciences tell us that we have broken the law, 
 that death is our due reward. Then a light 
 shines forth in the darkness, a comfort in our 
 trouble ; the kind and loving Savior comes, and 
 declares forgiveness of sins, release from death 
 and hell, and gives us hope for everlasting hap- 
 piness ! Blessed J esus ! thou earnest into our mis- 
 erable world, and took upon Thyself our deserv- 
 ed punishment! Thou hast died the bitter 
 death upon the cross for us ! Thou earnest, 
 Thou hast sought me out me a poor miserable 
 sinner Thou wilt take to Thy bosom ! O then, 
 take me ; hold me fast from the world and from 
 sin, and I shall be Thine for ever ! 
 
 Clara was much moved : such words she had 
 never before heard ; or was was it that she would 
 not hear ? Had her heart been hard, and had 
 the Lord now softened it ? Yes, the Lord can 
 give grace as He pleases, and by grace shall we
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 177 
 
 be saved. But this day ardent prayers had been 
 offered up especially for her, at the throne of 
 grace : Fritz Buchstein, Aunt Bieka, and Gret- 
 ta, had all seen her come into church, and had 
 besieged the Lamb of God for a blessing on this 
 forlorn sheep. 
 
 In going out of the church, Clara approached 
 her aunt : she felt almost ashamed of her fine 
 clothes ; and with a humble, soft expression of 
 countenance quite unusual to her, she wished 
 them a merry and happy festival. Her aunt and 
 Gretta took her hand most kindly, and they 
 walked together as far as Mrs. Bendler's house. 
 While bidding adieu, Clara said, " I have long 
 intended to come and see you, and if you will 
 permit me, I will come soon." "With the last 
 words the tears started to her eyes, and she hur- 
 ried away. 
 
 12
 
 CHAPTER XI. 
 
 OK Sylvester evening, Mrs. Bendler, as usual, 
 had her little walnut-shell boats floating in 
 the basin ; but Gretta had no anxiety this year 
 about her boat. All was gayety and enjoyment : 
 Fritz read the Bible, and they sang hymns, until 
 the clock struck twelve, when they all knelt 
 down to pray to God to help and guide them in 
 the coming year. 
 
 There was another scene at Gunther's. Ever 
 since Christmas he had been in a particularly 
 good temper ; and on Sylvester morning he said 
 to Clara : " To-day we must have a grand party. 
 It will be the last Sylvester that we shall ever 
 spend here; and who can tell where we shall 
 spend the next new-year's eve ! In some far dis-
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 179 
 
 taut country very likely, where you will not re- 
 quire to fetch cakes and sugar yourself. But 
 to-day you must go for them ! " And putting 
 five dollars upon the table, he said, " Buy ev- 
 ery thing that is necessary for a good cold supper, 
 and then be a sensible wife. I do not see why 
 when I must toil from morning till night I 
 may not take my pleasure now and then. Is it, 
 then, so very dreadful, if one gets a little eleva- 
 ted at times ? Look at the wife of the rent-pro- 
 prietor : she only laughs when her husband gets 
 tipsy, lets him sleep off the drunken fit, and they 
 get on together as well as before. One need not 
 be a confirmed drunkard ; but, on particular oc- 
 casions, a glass or two more may certainly be 
 allowed." 
 
 Clara saw plainly that if she would avoid all 
 scolding or strife, she must agree to these theo- 
 ries and she was determined to try how fair 
 means would act upon her husband. He might, 
 by degrees, learn to see the crime of drunken- 
 ness with her eyes. Besides, her mother was
 
 180 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 present at the conversation, and was entirely of 
 the same opinion as her son-in-law. " Clara," 
 she said, " has read too many novels, and has 
 strange notions with regard to life : she thinks 
 that all men ought to he perfect angels, and she 
 herself is very far removed from an angel." 
 Guuther agreed jokingly to this, and they were 
 all in high good humor with each other. 
 
 The guests arrived. At first all went on very 
 decently and quietly, but by degrees both men 
 and women became more and more lively, and 
 the new year was ushered in with the most out- 
 rageous noise. 
 
 Clara alone was silent all the jests of the 
 others were powerless to rouse her from her mel- 
 ancholy. She told them she did not feel quite 
 well; which excuse was taken, instead of the 
 real one disgust at their coarse vulgarity. She 
 was by nature too refined to be free or comforta- 
 ble in the midst of this low drinking society. 
 Her mind was still giddy enough for her to enjoy 
 pleasures, but then it must be something more re-
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 181 
 
 fined than the bottle : and, beside all this, the ser- 
 vice in St. Stephen's Church, on Christmas-day, 
 had left a serious impression upon her mind. She 
 did not understand it herself she felt wretched 
 and miserable, and found no happiness in eating 
 and drinking, or in fine clothes. When the rent- 
 proprietor had taken his full allowance of liquor, 
 his wife proposed going away ; the others fol- 
 lowed their example, and Gunther went to bed 
 to sleep off' the effects of his drink. The next 
 morning he arose pale and weak, his hand trem- 
 bling so much that he could scarcely lift the 
 coffee-cup to his mouth ; and yet he tried to per- 
 suade his wife of the innocence of such pleas- 
 ures, and that it depended solely on the women 
 to keep the men to a harmless degree of moder- 
 ation ! Clara was silent : the horrors of the past 
 evening, and the pale, trembling man before her, 
 were dreadful objects of contemplation ; and 
 more and more clearly the last Sylvester even- 
 ing arose to her memory: the lively, inno- 
 cent conversation the hymn-singing Fritz
 
 182 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 Buchstein Bible-reading. What a different 
 sort of a man he is he whom I then judged 
 coarse to the low, rude fellows who now sur- 
 round my paths ! How comfortable and happily 
 Gretta can live with him " the home-spun Gret- 
 ta v whilst I, in spite of silk cloak, velvet bon- 
 net, etc., must live in continual disgust and fear 
 of my husband. She dreaded the future, for she 
 felt that there was no hope of improvement; and 
 the bitterness of her cup was increased by the 
 feeling, that she alone was to blame for all her 
 misery. How to extricate herself from the net 
 into which she had cast herself, she knew not : 
 she had neither faith nor courage to cast herself 
 upon Him who alone could help her in her 
 trouble. No ; she had made her own bed, and 
 all she could do now was to lie down in it. 
 
 January passed over very quickly for Clara, in 
 sewing and making preparations for her baby. 
 She had learned one lesson by her work that 
 was entirely new to her, viz., that of quiet in- 
 dustry. She had always loved excitement ; now
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 183 
 
 her thoughts were constantly with the baby she 
 hoped to see dressed in the little garments ; and 
 a sweet, quiet joy filled her whole heart. 
 
 But she was not to enjoy this peaceful pleas- 
 ure bng ; for Giinther, in the joyful mood into 
 which he had fallen for some weeks past, drank 
 a bottle of good wine oftener than usual ; and 
 in order to be able to get over his fit of drunk- 
 enness unobserved, he carried it over to his own 
 house. Sometimes he took his potation quietly, 
 but more frequently with singing and shouting ; 
 and Clara had some trouble to quiet him. In 
 this manner the beginning of February passed 
 over ; but for eight days Clara had been con- 
 stantly unwell; her mother had been with her 
 day and night, in order to do the necessary 
 house-work, and at the same time to attend to 
 the drunken man for which she was much 
 better fitted than her daughter, having had 
 good practice with her own drunken husband ; 
 and her feelings had been completely blunted, 
 so that she was always ready to take Gunther's
 
 184 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 part against her daughter for which he showed 
 her much gratitude. 
 
 On Shrove Tuesday, although Clara was only 
 a little better after her severe illness, Giinther 
 had determined to have his boon-companions 
 for a grand carouse. Clara was happy that the 
 women were not invited, as she could shut her- 
 self up in her bed-room with her mother, and 
 thus be spared at least the disgusting sight of 
 the drunken men. 
 
 And well it was for her not to be present, for 
 the orgies were wild indeed that evening; but 
 her mother had some trouble to quiet her fears, 
 when she heard the loud and angry voices of 
 the men, added to the smashing of plates and 
 glasses: the shouting was no longer that of 
 wild folly, but of ungovernable rage. The two 
 women rushed out of their chamber : two men 
 were going out of the other door: the house- 
 proprietor lay on the floor, and Giinther was 
 beating him with his two fists. Clara tried to 
 hold her husband's arm, for the blood was al-
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 185 
 
 ready flowing over the forehead of the prostrate 
 man ; her mother was ready to lend her assist- 
 ance, and, with the joint aid of the two women, 
 he got out of the door. Now, however, Giin- 
 ther turned his rage upon his wife and mother- 
 in-law ; and it was as much as they could do to 
 save themselves in their bed-room. He was not 
 strong enough to burst the lock, and amused 
 himself with breaking all he could lay his hands 
 upon in the sitting-room. 
 
 Clara sat weeping, with a bloody nose. Giin- 
 ther's wild blow had just lighted on her face. 
 Her mother silently bathed it for her ; this last 
 piece of wickedness she dared not try to exten- 
 uate. Yes ; she was obliged patiently to listen 
 to her daughter's just reproaches for the manner 
 in which she had always palliated, and in some 
 sort encouraged her husband's faults. In her 
 rage, Clara made many plans for the future. 
 At all events, she would separate from this man, 
 from whose ill-treatment she could never feel 
 secure. She would resume her old trade of
 
 186 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 dress-making ; she would rather eat bread and 
 salt, etc., etc. At length she allowed herself to 
 be persuaded by her mother, and lay down to 
 rest; for as they heard Gunther snoring in the 
 next room, they might count upon a few hours 
 of repose. 
 
 The next morning Clara would not even see 
 her husband ; but as her mother was deter- 
 mined to remain neutral, she went out, lighted 
 the fire, and made coffee. Giinther looked at 
 her with an evil conscience : he had a good idea 
 of the violence he had been guilty of, but would 
 not confess his fault he found it much easier to 
 shift it on to the shoulders of the two women. 
 For the future, Clara must take care and not 
 put her nose into things which did not concern 
 her, and then she would not come in for any 
 blows: the house-proprietor had treated him 
 most shamefully, and well merited his beating. 
 The mother could not forbear reminding him of 
 Clara's recent illness, and that she had never 
 been accustomed to such treatment. Giinther,
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 187 
 
 however, would not listen to any thing, but per- 
 sisted that he had acted perfectly right. 
 
 Clara heard every word through the open 
 door, and she felt as if her heart would break. 
 With this man she could not possibly live ! But 
 how could she break loose from him ? She had 
 not a soul in the world to advise or help her ! 
 She thought of Aunt Rieka ; but had she not 
 faithfully warned her before she had taken the 
 fatal step ! No ; she dared not go to her. Be- 
 sides, from dread of her husband's anger, she 
 had put off from week to week going to pay 
 the promised visit to her aunt : and now she felt 
 it was too late. 
 
 It was a sad time for Clara now. That Giin- 
 ther kept quite out of her sight, was just what 
 she wished ; but since Shrove Tuesday, even the 
 few women of her acquaintance had not come 
 back to see her, and she felt herself quite for- 
 saken. And often lately she had been in want 
 of money; but fortunately her mother was al- 
 ways ready to go begging to Gunther, so that
 
 188 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 they were not in actual want of food. This last 
 blessing Clara's mother took care not to let her 
 forget: "Your husband is rich, therefore, he 
 has his humors, which you must put up with. 
 Your father treated me much worse, and I had 
 often to suffer hunger as well as his hard usage. 
 You, on the contrary, can live well, without any 
 care or anxiety, and need not soil your fingers." 
 Clara replied, " I would rather eat dry bread ; 
 yes, even starve, than submit to such treatment, 
 and, above all, lead such a wretched life ! " 
 " You alone ! " said the mother, " but your child ? 
 I know your feelings ; I also spoke as you do 
 now; but when you were born and I felt ill and 
 weak then I had other thoughts." " Yes ; the 
 child ! " sighed Clara : and that thought alone 
 gave her patience. Where should she go, with 
 the poor little creature ? She had hardly been 
 able to support herself how could she nurse the 
 baby, and still sew for it and herself! She swal- 
 lowed many an insult, and even tried to appear 
 friendly; because she discovered that nothing
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 189 
 
 was to be done with Gunther, except by fair 
 means. And when he came home drunk, beat- 
 ing and scolding every one, she made no change 
 in her manner toward him. 
 
 She had been once more at St. Stephen's 
 Church, immediately after the sad affair of 
 Shrove Tuesday ; the extraordinary feelings she 
 had had at the Christmas sermon came back 
 with full force to her mind. 
 
 But the minister was particularly serious in 
 his discourse this time : he described the awful 
 sufferings endured by our Lord and Savior, in 
 order to save us miserable, wretched sinners, 
 from everlasting death. He then proceeded to 
 describe the condition of an unconverted soul 
 the constant fears and disquietude in this present 
 life, and the inevitable punishment from the 
 justice of God in the next world. Clara felt so 
 much emotion on hearing these solemn words of 
 warning that many days elapsed before she 
 could calm down her feelings ; and she felt so 
 glad, -when time and occupation seemed to efface
 
 190 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 the remembrance of them, that she had not 
 again visited the church. 
 
 "Winter passed by, and spring came on with 
 its buds and flowers ; but poor Clara did not see 
 much of the revival of nature, for she had 
 never gone to walk in order to enjoy flowers and 
 green fields ; and Gunther no longer brought her 
 to the fine coffee-gardens he preferred rushing 
 off alone to his so-called pleasures. All this 
 was different to the life Clara had planned for 
 herself in the days of her romance. But how 
 could it be otherwise? The honeymoon love 
 must soon evaporate if there be no sure foun- 
 dation of mutual esteem, and respect, for it to 
 rest and expand upon. Real conjugal love must 
 grow up in such a soil ; the passion of admira- 
 tion is mere froth, which the first wind of ad- 
 versity blows away. 
 
 One evening, in the beginning of May, Clara 
 sat by her open window watching the gambols 
 of the children in the street. One of her neigh- 
 bors was returning from a pleasant walk in the
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 191 
 
 fields her two children quite laden with flow- 
 ers, primroses, tulips, etc., etc. Clara was so 
 much moved at the pretty sight, that she also 
 put on her bonnet and shawl and wandered out 
 of the town. 
 
 She wended her way direct to a gardener's, a 
 distant relation of her mother's, whom she had 
 often visited with her Aunt Rieka and Gretta, 
 before she had begun to find her pleasure and 
 satisfaction in concerts and coffee-gardens. She 
 felt a sensation of well-being and happiness at 
 sight of the sweet-smelling flowers and shrubs, 
 which had long been a stranger to her : the 
 little birds hopped and sung in the bushes, and 
 a nightingale poured forth his delicious strains 
 from a neighboring chestnut-tree. " Oh ! how 
 lovely is this beautiful world of God's creating!" 
 sighed Clara. " If he could only be thy God," 
 said she to herself! 
 
 She was just turning into a retired side-path, 
 but was startled out of her way by seeing Fritz 
 Buchstein, with Gretta by his side, sitting quite
 
 192 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 confidentially in an arbor. Fritz had his arm. 
 round her waist, and she had a wreath of white 
 blossoms in her hair : she looked exactly like a 
 bride. 
 
 Then, for the first time, Clara remembered 
 that they were to be married the next day. 
 That moved her beyond measure. She sought 
 a quiet corner in the thicket, and there gave 
 free course to her tears. She did not weep from 
 envy; no, she wept tears of regret and grief 
 over her own sad lot. How happy must Gretta 
 be by the side of an honest, upright man ! 
 " Yes ; uprightness is superior to the very finest 
 manners," thought she now. " If I could be- 
 come upright and pious in all my ways, perhaps 
 I should be happier ! But how shall I begin ? 
 Who will advise me ? When I think over that 
 last sermon I feel terrified, wretched and miser- 
 able, and yet I cannot forget it ; I cannot help 
 myself." She slipped quietly out of the garden ; 
 took a branch of hawthorn from the hedge, and 
 returned to her comfortless home in the twilight.
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 193 
 
 The next day she went early to St. Stephen's 
 Church. This time the minister preached a ser- 
 mon adapted to the spring, in which he illustra- 
 ted the beauty of the spring time of grace 
 in the soul of the believer. Clara was very 
 much comforted and strengthened by this ser- 
 mon. " The Lord is good and gracious toward 
 all men ; perhaps he will have mercy on me, and 
 turn away the misery of my life. He invites all 
 sinners ; surely he will not cast me ofi' utterly ! 
 But how shall I begin to come to Him ? And 
 how shall he help me? " "When Clara thought 
 of help, she considered only the outward troub- 
 les: she felt that Giinther was standing upon 
 the brink of a precipice, and that he would drag 
 her down with himself. Uneasiness about the 
 present, fear for the future, drove her to seek for 
 help; and as she was well aware that she 
 could obtain nothing from men, she was desi- 
 rous to try what she might gain from heaven. 
 The sermon of to-day gave her new courage; 
 
 the preacher who had spoken such sweet loving 
 13
 
 194 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 words, had completely gained her; and her 
 very highest wish now was to go and open her 
 whole soul to him. She knew of no one to 
 whom she could unburthen her mind unless to 
 him; for she had always received the serious 
 speeches and exhortations of her Aunt Eieka 
 with indifference or scorn ; and she felt herself 
 quite unable to disclose her sorrows, or confess 
 her faults to this aunt who had foreseen, and 
 faithfully warned her of all. 
 
 While the last verse was singing, the congre- 
 gation had gradually dispersed : a few only had 
 assembled in the choir to see Fritz and Gretta 
 married. Clara also stepped forward : real up- 
 right sympathy in Gretta's happiness induced 
 her to assume the part of spectator in the cere- 
 mony. Strange thoughts came over her as she 
 stood there. ""Where Gretta now stands, I 
 might have stood ; and what a husband he will 
 make ! " Yes ; Clara had already admired him, 
 and thought him too good for Gretta, but in her 
 folly and blindness she had despised him, and
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 195 
 
 cast back the warm language of his heart with 
 scorn. ISTow he stood there, looking so hand- 
 some, so manly, and so mild ! The tears started 
 to Clara's eyes, her heart was moved, and 
 when the minister requested the congregation to 
 pray for the young couple, she folded her hands, 
 and, for the first time in her life, offered up an 
 earnest prayer to God. "When Fritz met her 
 friendly sympathizing gaze, a joyful surprise 
 filled his bosom, for though he had devoted his 
 entire heart to Gretta, he felt as if Clara's soul 
 must be united to his : all the ardent prayers of 
 his youth would not surely be lost : she must be 
 saved and they would yet praise God together 
 to all eternity, where there would be " neither 
 marrying nor giving in marriage." 
 
 Clara was turning in her mind the possibility 
 of making the acquaintance of the minister, 
 and how she would set about it. Her baby was 
 born about the end of June, and she thought 
 the baptism of her little daughter would be a
 
 196 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 good opportunity to talk to the minister about 
 the state of her soul. 
 
 Gunther seemed quite changed in his manner 
 to his wife; she was as beautiful as ever, and 
 the little girl had got her mother's large blue 
 eyes and fine features. He was proud of both, 
 and brought home splendid presents to them, 
 and when they were alone together, he even 
 asked pardon for his past bad conduct, and 
 promised her a golden future ; giving her, at the 
 same time, to understand that she would have 
 soon to change her dwelling ; and inquired how 
 old the baby must be before it would be able to 
 take a long journey. 
 
 Clara might again have indulged in fine 
 dreams for the future, but she had become wise 
 by dear-bought experience ; and Giinther's eyes 
 were at times so unsteady, his words so mysteri- 
 ous, that she actually felt afraid when he was 
 near. 
 
 When baby was five weeks old, it was bap- 
 tized in St. Stephen's Church. Gunther had no-
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 197 
 
 thing against the proposal ; indeed, he scarcely 
 heard what was said w T hen the question was put 
 to him. But he firmly refused to allow Gretta 
 to be godmother he would not allow Clara to 
 have any thing to do with those people : howev- 
 er, Clara persisted in having her own way with 
 regard to the name, so she called her little 
 daughter Gretta. 
 
 On Clara's birthday the little one slept peace- 
 fully in his cradle beside the mother. The 
 birthday-table stood before the sofa : Giinther 
 had adorned it with flowers and cakes in the 
 morning; and besides that, he had given her 
 thirty dollars, with the injunction to keep them 
 safely, as she would need them soon. Clara had 
 heard this injunction so often, that she paid no 
 further attention to it than putting the money 
 away in her work-box. The twilight was ap- 
 proaching: she sat by the open window; the air 
 was heavy in the room, as it had been a very 
 close day. Her thoughts were very serious : she 
 had become suddenly so much happier than for-
 
 198 ABOVE HEK STATION. 
 
 merly Gunther was so much changed had 
 God indeed heard her prayers? Her heart was 
 turned to thankfulness, and she made the vow, 
 that if God would continue her happiness, she 
 would hecome religious and steady. Involunta- 
 rily, she placed her happiness solely upon out- 
 ward circumstances. 
 
 With much astonishment, she saw Mr. Rein- 
 hard and two men come quickly across the street 
 toward her dwelling. Wondering what was to 
 come next, she went to meet them. 
 
 "Where is your hushand?" asked Mr. Rein- 
 hard, hastily. 
 
 " I thought he was at the hotel," said Clara, 
 embarrassed, " and have been expecting him 
 every moment. To-day is my birthday," added 
 she, pointing to the gaily-adorned table ; " and 
 he intended to take a walk with me." 
 
 " The rascal ! " grumbled Reinhard ; and Clara 
 sank back upon her seat, quite startled. " You 
 must permit me to open the escritoire" continued
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 199 
 
 Reinhard ; and commenced trying the keys in 
 the lock. 
 
 Clara hegged Mr. Reinhard, with tears, to ex- 
 plain to her what had happened ; and Mr. Rein- 
 hard told her, not very politely, that Giinther 
 had swindled him out of at least ten thousand 
 dollars that he had taken a most shameful ad- 
 vantage of the confidence reposed in him that 
 he had forged his handwriting, used his seal, 
 passed false notes, and was most probably now 
 on his road to America. Clara, quite overcome 
 with this news, wept aloud. Mrs. Krauter ar- 
 rived just then, and increased the noise and 
 confusion by her w^ailing. 
 
 They found nothing in the escritoire. Clara 
 told them that Giiuther had burned a number of 
 what he called useless papers very lately. 
 
 Whilst many more persons assembled to wit- 
 ness the proceedings of the above-mentioned 
 persons, and the little Gretta had been rudely 
 roused from her slumbers by the noise and con-
 
 200 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 fusion, the letter-carrier came with a letter for 
 Clara. Hastily she broke the seal, and read : 
 
 " Dear Clara ! I write in great haste. "When 
 you receive these lines I shall be very near Ham- 
 burg, from whence I start immediately by the 
 steamer for London, and then to America. 
 Pack up your things quickly no one can dis- 
 pute your dowry and come to Hamburg with 
 our little Gretta. In the Suburbs, St. Paul, No. 
 10, you will meet with a friendly reception upon 
 giving your name at the same time, learn all 
 particulars ; and a comfortable passage to Amer- 
 ca will be provided for you. I entreat you not 
 to forsake me. I cannot live without you and 
 our child. I shall receive you with open arms, 
 and introduce you into our hotel. There you 
 will live like a princess, and soon forget the beg- 
 gary which now presses so hard upon you. 
 
 "You will come! I doubt not: and remain 
 
 for ever, your 
 
 "EDWARD GUNTIIER." 
 
 Clara involuntarily allowed the letter to be
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 201 
 
 read by Mr. Reinhard. He became more furious 
 when lie learned that the deceiver had escaped 
 him, and asked Clara, with bitter words, her 
 opinion of the proposal. She declared that she 
 would rather starve with her child than follow 
 this man. "When Mr. Reinhard discovered that 
 Clara was altogether ignorant of the matter, 
 when he saw how much she suffered, he assumed 
 a milder tone toward her ; but she was obliged 
 to quit her dwelling, and leave all the furniture 
 behind, because she could not deny that Giinther 
 had bought it all. She was only allowed to take 
 away the little bed for her child, her own clothes, 
 and a few small articles.
 
 CHAPTER XII. 
 
 CLARA again sat in her mother's little room. 
 The two years she had been absent from it 
 appeared to her like a dream a dream which 
 had begun in levity and vain-glory, and ended in 
 want and misery. The sultry days were follow- 
 ed by storms, which were uow changed to gentle 
 rain; but notwithstanding the rain, the mother 
 had gone out to make some purchases, because 
 her house was altogether empty for she was in 
 excellent spirits ever since Clara had let her see 
 the thirty dollars in her work-box. She lived 
 only in the present, and said the Lord will pro- 
 vide for the future. 
 
 She often had the name of the Lord in her 
 mouth, even though she may not have had Him 
 in her heart.
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 203 
 
 Clara was in very low spirits. She sat at the 
 window, looking upon the gray wet houses and 
 the falling drops of rain : " What will the neigh- 
 bors say, when they see you here again, a vic- 
 tim of want and shame ? " said she, to herself. 
 " What will Agusta Vogler say, "who has 
 often visited me in my nice home, and envied 
 me its splendor and riches? What will Aunt 
 Rieka say, who long ago predicted all these mis- 
 fortunes ? But surely she will be sorry for me ? 
 She told my mother she was gratified at my call- 
 ing the baby Gretta, and pleased to see me in 
 the church." 
 
 " Yes, St. Stephen's Church ! It has been of 
 no service to me : God has not heard my prayer. 
 He has sent the punishment which I have so well 
 merited; He is a just God I" Clara could not 
 raise her eyes, but her whole life passed before 
 her mind ; the two last years seemed a long pe- 
 riod. 
 
 It was just about this time two years ago, that 
 Fritz Buchstein returned, when she regarded
 
 204 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 him with contempt, and was anxious to obtain 
 the medical student. She knew now that coarse 
 and godless men could act very roughly toward 
 their wives, though their language was very soft 
 and sweet before matrimony. She had the ex- 
 perience that there was no joy in fine clothes, nor 
 an easy life, when the heart is heavy and full of 
 grief. She recalled to mind the life she had led 
 with Madame von Trautstein, and the crimes 
 her levity had caused her to commit ; she cover- 
 ed her face with both hands, she felt so full of 
 shame. How differently she now thought about 
 the Count that light-minded dishonorable man, 
 who had nearly ruined her altogether ; yes, she 
 felt as if God alone had kept her from a still 
 deeper fall and outward scandal. She also re- 
 called to mind with what levity she had cast 
 herself into the power of Gunther, of whose bad 
 and heartless character she had received timely 
 warning from her aunt. She was foolish enough 
 then to believe that if she had but riches and 
 outward comforts, she would be happy. But
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 205 
 
 how very miserable and comfortless she had 
 felt herself beside him, even from the first ; and 
 had he not now destroyed her future peace and 
 happiness here on earth ? But a joyful thought 
 came to her mind God can still help me ! Her 
 aunt had often told her, that present trials and 
 sorrows were no misfortune, because they are very 
 often the means which God takes to make us val- 
 ue and seek true everlasting joy and happiness. 
 She glanced at her sleeping babe, and felt a pre- 
 sentiment of higher joy than earthly pleasures 
 had yet offered to her. "To live to work for 
 that sweet child shall henceforward be my joy 
 and comfort ! " O how sweetly it stretched out 
 its little arms, and opened its soft eyes ! Clara 
 took it in her bosom, and forgot all her cares : 
 she determined to overcome all shame, and go 
 the very next day to seek work in her old trade 
 as dress-maker : the thirty dollars were to be 
 saved, in order that her child would want for 
 nothing. 
 
 But it was ordered otherwise. Clara's delicate
 
 206 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 frame had received such a shock that she was 
 unable to leave her bed the next morning ; and 
 her disorder was soon discovered to be brain- 
 fever. For days she was insensible : she knew 
 not that her life had been despaired of. At 
 length the crisis was past, and she was again 
 conscious. Aunt Rieka and Gretta cautiously 
 approached her bed : she was too weak to 
 speak ; she smiled her thanks to them. Her 
 baby was brought to her : she felt so happy to 
 see it ; from day to day she became stronger, 
 and felt as if she was new-born. 
 
 And was she not ? A time of convalescence 
 is often a time of rich blessing. Aunt Rieka 
 knew this, and took advantage of it : the heart 
 is then tender, and the good seed can take root. 
 Mrs. Bendler spoke words of comfort and en- 
 couragement to the invalid, and Clara heard 
 her gladly. She did not reproach her for her 
 former life of levity and sin no ; she was now 
 to live in the present, and for the future. And 
 the minister of St. Stephen's Church came to see
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 207 
 
 her, as she had told her aunt of her ardent 
 desire to talk to him. Warm and deep were 
 the words of grace and love which he delivered 
 to her from the Lord : they sank deeply into 
 her heart, and in God's own time brought forth 
 their fruit. Clara learned to know her Savior : 
 she felt that, in spite of all her sins and short- 
 comings, she could go and cast herself and her 
 burthens at his feet: she felt that the world 
 could never offer her any thing comparable to 
 His great love ! Sad remembrances of the past 
 would come at times to disturb her peace and 
 joy; but when she saw her aunt and Gretta, 
 only weak mortals like herself, returning all her 
 scorn and levity with love and kindness, she 
 could not help feeling that the great and good 
 Savior was also full of mercy, and that He 
 would receive her : though her sins had been as 
 scarlet, they should be as wool. Yes ; she felt 
 that His blood and righteousness were all-suf- 
 ficient, even for her. 
 
 Clara sometimes felt as if she would like to
 
 208 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 know if Fritz Buchstein despised her very 
 much ; she would have wished to let him see she 
 was really sorry and humbled at having treated 
 him so badly. But she could not ask after him ! 
 Gretta told her that he only awaited her permis- 
 sion to come and see her; she had scarcely 
 power to say he would be welcome. 
 
 Soon after, Clara was sitting alone with her 
 child; the door opened, and Fritz stepped in. 
 Clara rose up, startled from her seat, but Fritz 
 made her sit down again, and most kindly wish- 
 ed her a good evening. She could not stand his 
 mild sympathizing look : her heart overflowed ; 
 she took his hand in both of hers, and wept bit- 
 terly. That was too much for Fritz ; he turned 
 quickly to the window. The hand which she 
 had watered with her tears he placed next his 
 heart, and prayed God to grant him strength_ 
 Then, strong in his God, he sat down beside her, 
 spoke words of comfort, but asked her chiefly 
 about her outward circumstances. Clara feared 
 lest she had shown too much feeling, and with
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 209 
 
 an effort contrived to suppress all signs of emo- 
 tion. The little Gretta was a fruitful source of 
 conversation. Her Aunt Rieka and Gretta 
 came in just then, and Clara breathed more 
 freely. Aunt Rieka spoke with Fritz about 
 Clara's wish to have her separation from Giinth- 
 er drawn out at the lawyer's as soon as possible 
 and this, considering the provocation she had 
 received, could not be difficult. Then Clara 
 talked about her plans : how she would again 
 commence sewing, and, with God's help, provide 
 for herself and her child. With these words she 
 pressed her baby to her heart ; but she did not 
 observe how very sadly her aunt's looks rested 
 upon the poor little thing, whose large blue eyes 
 shone so pensively from the pale thin cheeks. 
 The serious illness of the mother had naturally 
 a very bad effect upon the child, and every one 
 saw plainly that it was sinking. Clara alone 
 could not believe her child was in danger. 
 
 The next Sabbath she went to St. Stephen's 
 
 Church for the first time since her illness. Her 
 14
 
 210 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 heart was full of thankfulness to God, for she 
 could approach the throne of grace in full con- 
 fidence now. Her wishes and desires were cen- 
 tered in the grace and love of God, not in earth- 
 ly things as was formerly the case. 
 
 Her first journey to the town was a difficult 
 one. She told no one she was going to Madame 
 von Trautstein; that lady against whom she 
 had sinned most, whose goodness and friendship 
 she had rewarded with deception and ingrati- 
 tude: her forgiveness she felt she must ask. 
 With a beating heart she ascended the stairs, 
 and rung at the door. The old servant, who 
 had always been friendly to her, gave her' cour- 
 age by the kindness of his manner. "While he 
 went to tell his mistress that Clara was there, 
 she stood alone in the ante-room. There was 
 the work-table at the window, with the well-re- 
 membered work-basket ! As she stood there, so 
 changed, recalling to mind all her vanity and all 
 her idle plans for the future, a blush of shame 
 passed over her features. How quickly had
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 211 
 
 these mad plans for future greatness been ex- 
 changed for real misery! She dreaded the 
 serious words of her old mistress, and yet she 
 longed to unbosom herself to her to cast herself 
 at her feet. 
 
 During this interval, Madame von Trautstein 
 was reasoning with herself whether she would 
 admit Clara or not. She had heard of Clara's 
 misfortunes, and thought she had merited them 
 all, and believed now that nothing but want 
 and beggary had driven her to seek her out 
 at that time. She felt ashamed of this hard 
 thought, however, before the old servant, who 
 had mentioned Clara with so much sympathy, 
 and never seemed to doubt that she would be 
 admitted ; so she said, yes. 
 
 Clara could scarcely speak at first from fear ; 
 she took the old lady's hand and kissed it in si- 
 lence. Madame von Trautstein said coldly ; " I 
 have heard of your misfortunes, and am sorry 
 for you." 
 
 " I am not unhappy now, gracious lady," in-
 
 212 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 terrupted Clara, modestly, "not nearly so un- 
 happy as I was when in your service." The 
 lady looked surprised, and Clara continued : " I 
 have bitterly repented of my levity, and hope, 
 with the help of God, to become a new crea- 
 ture; and the very first desire of my heart, 
 with regard to my fellow-creatures, was to come 
 and ask your forgiveness for my past conduct ; 
 and I hardly dare expect it ; for, oh ! I was so 
 bad, I even stole from you ! " 
 
 Clara could not speak farther : the kind old 
 lady was so much moved by this unexpected 
 scene, that her whole manner changed suddenly, 
 and she assured the pale, suffering young wo- 
 man of her full, heartfelt forgiveness. She con- 
 versed farther with Clara asked her what plans 
 she had for the future; and when she heard 
 that she intended to sew for her support, she 
 provided work for her herself, and offered to 
 recommend her to new customers. 
 
 Clara was much moved with this unexpected 
 goodness, and thanked God for it, as an answer
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 213 
 
 to her prayers ; but she said : " Madame von 
 Trautstein, you must first prove my sincerity, 
 before you can trust me to come into your house 
 to work for you." 
 
 This sincere repentance made the old lady 
 more friendly, and Clara parted from her full of 
 hope for the future. But God was going to 
 teach her to lean on Him alone not even to 
 trust to the help of the good and pious : He had 
 still a thorny path to lead her through.
 
 CHAPTER XIII. 
 
 WHEN Clara returned home and took her 
 baby from her mother, she observed, for 
 the first time, that it did not look like other 
 children of the same age. A cold shudder 
 passed through her frame as she saw the pale 
 thin cheeks, the large eyes ; and, grasping the 
 little thin wasted hand, she gazed beseechingly 
 up to heaven. " No ! God will not try me thus 
 I could never bear this blow. Perhaps He 
 will try my faith : I will never cease to pray for 
 my darling ! " 
 
 She asked her mother and her aunt if there 
 was danger for the child ; and felt a little com- 
 forted when they said that it sometimes happen- 
 ed that weak children, if they survived the first 
 year, got on as well as the strong ones afterward.
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 215 
 
 " Ah ! " said she, " I will tend it and care for it 
 so carefully, if God will only bless the means." 
 
 But it was a hard trial to her to be obliged to 
 leave her little one to the care of her mother, 
 when she went out to sew. She had, however, 
 no other resource : the thirty dollars were ex- 
 pended, and they had nothing but her hands to 
 depend on for daily bread. She had soon as 
 much work to do as she could manage, and her 
 mother was very happy at that, though the 
 profits only reached from hand to mouth Mrs. 
 Krauter having never been in the habit of look- 
 ing farther. 
 
 Clara's life was now very uniform. On week- 
 days she sewed in the houses, and went every 
 Sabbath to St. Stephen's Church, spending the 
 rest of the day with her child. One trouble 
 which weighed heavily upon her mind, the legal 
 separation from her wicked husband, God him- 
 self had rid her of. The ship in which Giinther 
 sailed was lost, and he and his ill-gotten money 
 found one grave in the English Channel. So
 
 216 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 she might have lived on without care in her pres- 
 ent quiet mode of life, and become every day 
 happier, if she had not been worn with anxiety 
 about the health of her baby. Her faith was 
 still young and weak: she was not able, like 
 Abraham, to offer her heart's treasure willingly 
 to say, u Lord, here am I ! " 
 
 It was the first Sunday of Advent. Clara 
 had been early in the church, and had returned 
 quite refreshed from the good and faithful ser- 
 mon she had heard, to enjoy her Sabbath's re- 
 pose. Her mother had gone to her Aunt 
 Eieka's, and she sat alone with her sleeping 
 baby upon her knee. The snow fell thickly and 
 fast ; Clara felt as if she could see into heaven 
 through the white canopy ; her whole heart was 
 filled with a sensation and confidence in God, 
 quite new to her. " great God," said she ; 
 " do thou keep and preserve the present feelings 
 of my heart ! I feel that I am thine that I 
 can give up even my dearest earthly treasure." 
 She looked at her fading baby, but felt a blessed
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 217 
 
 light in her soul. The little Gretta opened her 
 heavy eyes ; her mother pressed her to her heart 
 and sighed : "Oh Lord, do thou give me strength : 
 I am weak, very weak ! " She felt that her baby 
 must die, and her heart was ready to bow itself 
 to the will of the most High. 
 
 But after these happy Sabbath hours followed 
 many a weary anxious one. Praying, hoping, 
 and various means were tried to save, ifpossible, 
 the dear child. She believed that her own care 
 and watching were needed, and therefore she 
 did not go out to sew, which made her mother 
 angry ; for though Clara tried her best to work 
 at home, yet the old woman soon observed on 
 the coffee that they had no longer so much mon- 
 ey. For hours, Clara would carry her sick child 
 in her arms, or sink down with weakness from 
 watching and weeping, quite unable to put in a 
 stitch. 
 
 All went on pretty well till about fourteen 
 days before Christmas. They had not been in 
 want of food or any thing else, but the mild
 
 218 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 weather suddenly changed to extreme cold, and 
 the want of wood was bitterly felt. Clara did 
 not dare to ask her Aunt Rieka for any help, 
 because she had herself been the cause of her 
 own misfortunes; neither had her mother the 
 courage to go to beg for aid, for her sister had 
 paid her rent for her. So they settled that, for 
 the present, they would help themselves by sell- 
 ing some of Clara's finery, which she would not 
 wear again for any money. Mrs. Krauter was 
 quite contented with this arrangement. She 
 thought that for a few weeks that would suffice 
 for longer the poor little worm could not live ; 
 and then Clara would again be industrious at her 
 needle, and their want would be at an end. 
 The black silk mantle and the velvet bonnet 
 took the lead, and were speedily followed by 
 other trifles, for which, however, they received 
 very little ; and as they had to keep up a fire 
 both night and day, beside buying food, medi- 
 cine, etc., the purse was soon as empty as before, 
 and, the third day after Christmas, Clara stood
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 219 
 
 in despair before her empty commode. She 
 found still a few trifles, which she felt almost 
 ashamed to offer for sale; but her mother re- 
 turned with a dollar, which she had got for 
 them. The worst feature about selling this fine- 
 ry was, that she had nothing solid left in 
 place of it. A woolen shawl was the only piece 
 of muffling she possessed, and during the mild 
 weather it was quite enough ; but now, in the 
 intense cold, she had neither a warm dress nor a 
 mantle, and could scarcely bear to leave the 
 warm room. 
 
 But even the room could no longer be kept 
 warm. On Sylvester morning, Mrs. Krauter re- 
 mained in bed, in order to keep herself from 
 freezing; and Clara went into the wood-cellar to 
 see if she could find even a few chips to make 
 their cup of coft'ee, and a little food for the ba- 
 by ; but there was not enough to heat the stove, 
 so as to warm the room. Clara never thought 
 about the cold for herself, but the baby must be 
 kept warm : she took her only flannel petticoat,
 
 220 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 and made a covering of it for the child ; then, 
 wrapping it up still closer in her warm shawl, 
 she walked up and down the cold room with it. 
 In order to have something under her thin mus- 
 lin dress, she put on the flounced petticoat of 
 her girlish days, which, from washing and wear, 
 had hecome so thin as to be hardly good enough 
 for lining, and had been cast aside in a corner 
 among rags. She argued with herself whether 
 she would go to her aunt's or not, or rather to 
 Buchstein's; for her aunt had been stopping there 
 for the last eight days, attending Gretta, who 
 had been very ill. At length she resolved to 
 go : the poverty was great ; the room became 
 colder and colder ; the mother was craving for 
 food, and both she and her child were hungry. 
 If she had but strength to pray ! she was weak 
 and faint; she could not raise herself; and bore 
 all this misery as a well-merited punishment. 
 
 The north wind blew through her thin cloth- 
 ing, as trembling from cold and weakness, she 
 entered Buchstein's house. Fritz was in the act
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 221 
 
 of taking from the hand of the apprentice a 
 basket of wood and shavings, which had been 
 gathered in the workshop. Clara looked upon 
 the basket with longing in her eyes. Fritz, who 
 understood every look of Clara's, knew well 
 what she meant. He felt for her; she is in 
 want, thought he ; she looks pale and wretched ; 
 she has been forgotten. 
 
 He led her into the room. Gretta had quitted 
 her bed for the first time, and sat in the arm- 
 chair wrapped up in blankets. Father Buch- 
 stein and Aunt Rieka sat beside her, and re- 
 joiced to see her so far restored ; but they were 
 not without anxiety, for her cough was very se- 
 vere, and the symptoms rather alarming. Aunt 
 Rieka was startled on seeing Clara enter the 
 room, looking like a picture of misery and want. 
 Fritz placed a chair near the stove for her, and 
 she sat down, her limbs still trembling with the 
 cold. "How are you?" asked her aunt with 
 anxiety.
 
 222 ABOVE HBR STATION. 
 
 " My mother is in bed, and my baby " 
 Here her feelings choked her utterance. 
 
 " "Why have you not put on a cloak? " contin- 
 ued her aunt. "How are you dressed?" lifting 
 involuntarily her gown, and the well-known 
 flounced petticoat. "Mercy on me ! not more than 
 that. Why have you no flannel petticoat? " said 
 her aunt ! Clara covered her face with her hands, 
 and sobbing, said, " I have none ! I have no- 
 thing! nothing!" Fritz went to the window; 
 he could not restrain his tears. Gretta begged 
 her aunt to get some warm clothing for Clara ; 
 but the latter said, weeping bitterly : " Oh, no- 
 thing for me ; only a little wood and a morsel to 
 eat for my mother and my child ! " 
 
 Fritz ran out of the room ; the basket of wood 
 stood still in its place ; all that he could find in 
 the larder he packed into it, and hastened to 
 Clara's house. What a scene he beheld there ! 
 empty and cold ; the baby crying, the grand- 
 mother lamenting! "With trembling hands he 
 lighted a fire, put on the kettle, and when Aunt
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 223 
 
 Rieka, with the now warmly-clad Clara, entered 
 the room, the latter had the comfort of hearing 
 the wood crackling in the stove. She gazed 
 upon him with humility and gratitude ; he could 
 not stand that look because his conscience 
 reproached him for having left her in want. 
 True, Gretta had been very ill, and much of his 
 time had been taken up with nursing her, but 
 he did not think of this now his neglect of 
 Clara and her mother was a burthen on his 
 mind. 
 
 Fritz sat quite alone that night to watch in 
 the new year, for his father was now very deli- 
 cate, and Aunt Rieka quite exhausted with 
 watching Gretta during her illness. The past 
 came vividly before his mind. It was just two 
 years since he had spoken the words of warning 
 to Clara how all had changed since then ! He 
 felt thankful that the Lord had heard his 
 prayers. By the side of his faithful Gretta he 
 had found comfort for all the sorrows of his 
 heart; and even though remembrances of his
 
 224 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 youthful love would sometimes return to his 
 mind, they were wholly unaccompanied by pain- 
 ful emotions. Clara had become estranged to 
 the world, and was won for heaven. Fritz prayed 
 earnestly that God would preserve and guide 
 them all in the straight and narrow way that 
 leadeth unto life eternal, and in His own good 
 time unite them in the Kew Jerusalem. 
 
 While Fritz was thus alone with his thoughts, 
 Clara sat in like manner beside the cradle of her 
 sinking child. She felt weak and ill ; life was 
 sad to her, and heaven seemed very far off. Her 
 child was her only comfort, and she could scarce- 
 ly believe that God would take it away from her ; 
 yet she felt that she deserved nothing better: 
 her past sinful life lay heavily upon her mind. 
 She fancied that she had been too wicked to 
 dare to hope for a share of her Savior's love ; 
 she sank both inwardly and outwardly. 
 
 The next morning, notwithstanding the warm 
 room, Mrs. Krauter did not rise, she was really 
 ill. Her sister, Mrs. Bendler, sent a doctor, and
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 225 
 
 he declared her disease to fee a fever. Clara 
 had now double duty to do; for as her Aunt 
 Rieka was obliged to stop by Gretta's sick-bed, 
 she could not give her any assistance. Fritz 
 came now and then, but he was always silent 
 and serious, which Clara accepted as a well-de- 
 served contempt for her ; and she had scarcely 
 courage to express her sense of gratitude for the 
 many little acts of care and attention she receiv- 
 ed at his hand. 
 
 At the end of three weeks, the doctor declared 
 Mrs. Krauter out of danger ; but the expression 
 of his face on looking at the baby conveyed no 
 hope to Clara's heart the more she nursed and 
 cared for it, the more dreadful it seemed to her 
 to be forced to separate from it. One evening it 
 would not take the breast, and hung its little 
 head ; grief pierced Clara's heart like a sword. 
 She did not know what to do. She ran to Aunt 
 Eieka's old Benjamin stood at the door Gret- 
 ta was most dangerously ill her aunt could not 
 
 leave her for a moment. Clara flew then to 
 15
 
 226 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 Agusta Vogler's. The doctor, when he came, 
 found the baby very ill indeed ; but it was just 
 what he had expected. Agusta stopped the 
 night, made tea, heated flannels for the baby, 
 and listened to Clara's complaints. The night 
 was long, thick flakes of snow darkened the air. 
 At last the day appeared. Clara held the dying 
 child upon her knee weeping bitterly ; the door 
 opened, and Aunt Kieka stepped in. 
 
 " My baby is dying ! " cried Clara, in despair. 
 
 "The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken 
 away ; His name be praised for ever ! " said her 
 aunt, much moved. 
 
 "No, no!" exclaimed Clara; and kissed the 
 last breath from the lips of her child. 
 
 " Yes, yes ! " said her aunt. " Clara, let us 
 pray ; we are both childless now," tears choked 
 her voice, " My dear Gretta is gone ! " 
 
 Clara stared at her. "Yes," continued her 
 aunt; "let us pray to our merciful Father in 
 heaven to give us strength and comfort in our 
 hour of need ! "
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 227 
 
 "The merciful God ! " moaned Clara ; but she 
 refused not to pray the remembrance of the 
 blessed hours she had already passed at the feet 
 of her Savior flowed like balm over her soul. 
 Yes ; she could approach her Father's throne ! 
 On the first Sunday of Advent, her baby had 
 lain upon her knee just as pale and weak, and 
 and yet she had then felt as if she could wholly 
 resign her to God. " Lord, help me ! " she 
 cried ; and the Lord did help her. Yes ; won- 
 derfully, quickly, immediately ! the vail was re- 
 moved from her heart, her fears were passed. 
 She could pray with her aunt, and weep bitter, 
 natural tears, though with resignation to the will 
 of God in her heart. 
 
 And these tears flowed frequently, but they 
 softened her sorrow, and she discovered that it 
 was good and merciful of God to afflict her, and 
 thus, through much tribulation, to make her a 
 child of heaven.
 
 CHAPTER XIV. 
 
 CLARA'S outward life was soon the same as 
 before the last illness of her child. She 
 again went out to sew, because she had regain- 
 ed her health and strength, and having nothing 
 to bind her to the house, she would not be 
 dependent upon any one for her daily bread. 
 Though her life was outwardly so quiet and 
 uniform, yet her heart was warm and lively : her 
 spirit ascended more and more to heaven, where 
 she believed her baby was with Christ and the 
 holy angels, and heaven came down in blessed 
 peace to her heart. She neither desired, nor 
 hoped for any thing better in this life ; and 
 when she spent a quiet Sabbath with her Aunt 
 Rieka, who treated her with love and confi- 
 dence; or when Fritz came in of an evening
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 229 
 
 and read to them from the Bible, or some other 
 good book, and talked over what they had read ; 
 or when she met an approving sympathizing 
 glance from him she felt as if she had never 
 deserved such happy days, and prayed God to 
 preserve her in simple faith till her life's end. 
 
 The summer passed over, and Sylvester even- 
 ing came again ; Fritz, Clara, and Aunt Rieka 
 sat together; there was neither jesting nor 
 laughing, but all three felt happy in the Lord. 
 Fritz felt all his old affection for Clara return ; 
 and though he did not express his feelings in 
 words, he now felt he could think of Clara, as a 
 companion, without danger to his soul. The 
 Lord had put hindrances nrhis way in order to 
 preserve him pure in the faith of Jesus, and 
 Clara had, through much tribulation, been re- 
 fined from the dross of this world. In con- 
 gratulating her, and wishing the blessing of 
 God for her in the new year, the tone of his 
 voice betrayed the feelings of his heart. Oh ! 
 what a thrill of joy ran through her soul ! She
 
 230 ABOVE HER STATION. 
 
 scarcely dared to look him in the face. She had 
 often prayed God to bless him, and had only 
 desired for herself, that he should not feel angry 
 with her for her former cruel heartless conduct 
 toward him. 
 
 Mrs. Krauter had never fully recovered from 
 the severe attack of fever she had had; and 
 after new-year's day, took to her bed, from 
 which she never rose. An inflammation of the 
 lungs carried her speedily from this world of 
 woe. 
 
 Clara was now an orphan : and yet not quite ; 
 for her aunt took her home to her heart to her 
 house and became a true mother to her. "When 
 the fresh buds of spring burst forth, Clara sat in 
 Gretta's little room sewing at the open window, 
 with snow-drops blooming beside her. Old Ben- 
 jamin had reared them for her : yes ; his affec- 
 tion for Gretta had been wholly transferred to 
 Clara, and the latter had learned to sing and 
 converse joyfully with the old man. And the 
 starling called out : " Clara,' so right ! " and she
 
 ABOVE HER STATION. 231 
 
 could now sing with the bullfinch : " Praise the 
 Lord, my soul ! " Fritz labored diligently in 
 his workshop looked sometimes out of his win- 
 dow and his heart beat high when he met 
 Clara's clear blue eyes, so bright, so child-like, 
 just as it appeared to him in his dreams, when 
 he was traveling. As spring advanced, Fritz 
 declared his love for Clara. 
 
 She is now Mrs. Fritz Buchstein, a comfort- 
 able citizen's wife : she is proud and happy in 
 her own rank; wears good strong stockings, 
 with stout leather shoes, and a clean simple 
 dress. She is more beautiful than ever, the joy 
 and blessing of her husband and family. Old 
 father Buchstein sits in his arm-chair with his 
 youngest grandchild upon his knee ; and Benja- 
 min leads a fair little Gretta over to Aunt 
 Rieka ; while Clara sits sewing under the open 
 workshop-window, and sings, with all the power 
 of her fine voice : 
 
 " Bless the Lord, O my soul ! "
 
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