^^^^^M^^^^m^m^^^^^^^^^^^ B 2 V'^b D3M UMl^i-^ , LlbKAKl \ UNIVERSITY Of CALIFOR^•'A / ^mr^mm^:'^- WAIFS IN VERSE. WAIFS IN VERSE B Y G. W. WICKSTEED, Q. C. 1 1 Law Clerk House of Commons of Canada. r-'-'i^/S^glg./z/ta'-.—- O T T AWA : A. BUREAU & FRiiRES, PRINTERS. 1SS7 TO MY WIFE, MY CHILDREN AND MY FRIENDS THIS VOLUME IS AFFECTIONATELY DEDICATED. I'.RRATA Page. 3 Line 12, Jive " back " put ' bark." '' 57 Line 13, for " Wright " /«^ " right." " 58 Li>ie -^ of Song for "send "put "sent." " 105 Line io,/ro7n bottom, after " true " insert " to " " 138 Line 3 after" duty " for " to " put "to " *^C " 139 VcrscQ, for " on" put " m^" " 155 Line 5, from hottom, for " warrier " /iitt '' warrior." IVkich the reader tuill oblige the author by correcting. In Notes and Appendix " X Li7ie 9, after " and " insert " am " " XVI /-/■«<' 21, a/j'i'r quietly ./or " at "/? Then our beaux are all priming and loading and drilling ; With brave loyal ardour eacli bosom is thrilling. ' If the brave love the fair, — why the fair love quadrilling, — Then why don't they give us a ball ? Oh dear, &c. Let them ne'er think that balls check men's ardour for fighting Or that^nw^^s throw cold water on what they delight in ; For the man who all points of war's science was right in. To Waterloo went from a ball. Oh dear, &c. If our Governor, lovers, or brothers or spouses, Will not open their castles, their hearts and their houses, And their tyranny once our resistance arouses. We know who will give us a ball. Oh dear, &c., We'll resolve that the grievance surpasses all reason ; We'll declare such brutality justifies treason ; We'll compound with the rebels for one merry season : — And Papineau '11 give us a ball. Oh dear, &c. Every lady who can sing will please to chaunt the above on all fitting occasions, until our grievance is redressed; or "we seek elsewhere a remedy for our afllictions." By order of the Committee. 48 The Fancy Ball at Rideau Hall. THE FANCY BALL AT PJDEAU HALL. The following is out of place as to date ; but its subject is so cognate to the last article that I insert it here. Dear Times, — Your paper is a sort of omnibus, and a very nice one ; can you find room in it for a young lady, without crowding out some of those charming articles in which we so much delight, about bishops, and priests of St. Albans, and aprons, and candlesticks, and Aliieiman Waller, and Mr. Martin. Try like a good soul. Our dear Governor's ball has been talked about and written about a good deal and not badly, though I have heard there is high authority for saying that the right account of it has j-et to be written. But nobody has adverted to its constitutional virtues and the impetus it has given to loyalty. In the dark daj's of 1837, when rebellion was rife, Lord Gosford, a good kind soul as ever lived, seems to have forgotten this point of policy— and the extract I send you from papers of the time, will show you the peril to which the State was exposed in consequence. Miss Quadrille was my grand-mamma, a worthy girl as ever lived, and no more inclined to look to Washington than one of Her Majesty's Ministers, — as loyal and as British as the fair lady who enacted Britannia at Rideau Hall. Think of the pent-up suftering she must have endured before she was forced in her agony to cry out as she did. Lord Gosford gave the ball and saved the country. Lord Duflferin, more far-seeing, gave }vs ball without waiting even for a hint, he knew the " well-understood wishes " of the ladies, and met them, and he has not only been good himself but has made others good by his example, and those ducks of Ministers and their charming ball followed his lead of course. I am in possession of the archives of the Quadrille family, — and, if your readers desire to see it, I can show them Lord Gosford's answer, which my dear grandmamma used The Fancy Ball at lildeau Ball. 49 to say he sang most feelingly to the air of " The Sprig of Shilo. hill," like a jolly son of Erin, as he was.* I have an account of i\\Q fancy ball, too, of the time, reported by a very junior mem. her of your profession, since perhaps an editor — or dead. -|- Bcfore closing, I must tell you, that at a jolly meeting of a number of young men and maidens, who had been at the ball 1 ventured modestly to imitate my tuneful ancestress and sang : SOLO : Round me while singing, exultingly stand, ye boys And ye girls, smiling all ; — and ye girls and ye boys Join in one cheer for the chief of the Clandeboys, Giver of beautiful balls ! CHORUS : No, no, nothing's the matter now, No, no, nothing's the matter now. No, no, nothing's the matter now — Dufferin gave us the ball ! And I assure 3''ou the chorus could not have been given more heartily if Mr. Dixon had written it for us and Mr. Mills had drilled us. Affectionately yours. Miss Quadrille, Jr Ottawa, March 3, 187G. * Lord G.'s answer will be foutid at the foot of the next article. Lord DufFerin\s Fancy Ball was simply Magnificent t See next article. 4 50 The Devil's Extra. THE DEVILS EXTEA. Of the Quebec Morning Herald, for New- Yearns Day, 1838. We were in despair — It was New Year's Eve— we hud passed the earlier portion of the night at snap-dragon and other pas- times in which innocent fiends like ourselves delight: — but the hour of retribution was come upon us, and fearful was our agony. — It was late and we had not a word of our address written, nor could we compose a line. Bloodshed and Eebellion were most unseasonable subjects, and, Devils as we are, we could not resolve to talk of them to our Patrons on New Year's day.— We leave it to our professional antagonists to preach the duty of being dismal. — We roamed desolate and miserable thro' the deserted printing loom. Rvery thing looked gloomy to us, the disordered types were but types of our own thoughts, a confused dark mass without form. — Yet our master could make them speak oracles on all subjects ; they wanted nothing but arranging. It was even so with our thoughts : with the help of a dictionary we can think every word in the language and the faculty of arrangement is all we want to enable us to surpass every human production, but the Herald — that alone we esteem perfect — We have genius enough, we lack nothing but the Bump of Order. — We cast our eyes listlessly on the Editor's desk, — there was a note upon it. Our eyes rested upon the superscription and our listlessness vanished instantly. That superscription was, in the most delicate of female hands — "To THE Devil." We remembered that for one day we were an Editor. We opened the gilt-edged envelope — we breathed the perfume of the enclosed Billet — we read it on our knees. It was from the adorable Miss Quadrille. After hinting at the sacrifices which her sex, from Eve downwards, had made to please us — she The DeviVs Extra. 51 expressed a hope that wc had equal complaisance for them^ She told us that she had sent Mr. Mercury an energetic remons- trance against the dull rudeness of N. O. Quadrille, but that the God of Thieves had sheltered the imposter. She threw herself on our gallantry and solicited our aid — tho' she knew the Mr. Mercur}' [who is a great witj would say that, like a true woman, she had come to the Devil to gain her point. Here was a subject for us ; and we thought in our simplicity that because we were an Editor, wit and wisdom would come of course: — we sat down in the Editorial chair, but they came not. We felt duller than ever — Wo even caught ourselves nodding : we thought till then that Editors never nodded. We grew sleepy — we slept ! We were in the Eeporters' box in the Hall of Assembly, which was illuminated with unusual brilliancy. The triple windows, tjqjical of the threefold medium through which tho light of collective wisdom reaches the " great body of the people," — were curtained by the flag which rules the ocean. The clock showed that midnight had passed — it was New Year's day. — Our kind-hearted Governor was in the Speaker's chair. On his right and left hands stood the Officers of our gallant Volunteer Corps. The floor of the Hall was occupied by the most brilliant assemblage of lovely women we had ever seen, and a little in advance of them stood one of surpassing elegance. Tho brave smiled on the fair, and the fair returned the smile : " Soft eyes look'd love to eyes that spoke again, "And all went merry as a marriage bell," — but they mingled not. We were puzzled to know why, 'till, recalling our senses, we remarked that a most delicious band was concluding the symphony of the " Sprig of Shilelah," and we knew that Miss Q. and the ladies had just presented 52 The DevWs Extra. their address, and received His Excellency's answer. * It was heard with one burst of unmingled delight: we remembered that "when maidens sue, men give like gods," and felt that by this act, at least as mnch as by his Proclamation, His Lordship has deserved the delicate compliment in the Address from L'Acadie, and " S'est plac6 comme V Intenn6dl'dre entre la Divinite et les hommes." The picture of the fourth George seemed to smile approval on the representative of His Successor, and we almost expected to see him leave his frame and salute Miss Q. after his accustomed fashion. We listened breathlessly for the answers of the volunteers to JVIiss Q.'s suggestions — they came in rapid and delightful succession. All were, of course, * LOED GOSFORD'S ANSWER. Dear Ladies,, I find you've beea taking a hint From the last of the Loyal Addresses in print. Where St. Roch's and St. Vallier's their feelings express ; If they get all they ask, they're of loyalty rare, If they don't they'll he rebels — that is, when they dare : — Tho' they speak not, dear Ladies, as frankly as you, 'Tis the feeling that runs thro' the famed ninety-two, And is echoed about in each Loyal Address. The first author of this is a Judge of the land, f And Debartzch sits a Councillor on my right hand, For a similar hint about Government faults ; But as curls would look queer in a three-cornered hat, And a seat in the Council, just now, is not at Any premiun, I hope to conciliate all My fair threat'ners by " cheerfully" giving a Ball, When Miss Q. and myself shall lead off the first waltz. I acknowledge your grievance, you've cause to be vexed. And, no longer by fears of rebellion perplex'd, To its gradual removal I'll give my chief care. Then don't join the rebels, dear Ladies, in haste, For Sir John gives them Balls that are not to their taste : Let the lovely be true to their lovely young Queen, And I'll give you a Ball such as never was seen, For I'm pleasing my Sovereign when pleasing the Fair. f Bedard. The Devil's Extra. 53 favorable, the music struck up, " Oh Abraham Newland," and tlic Captain of one of the Lower Town bands sung — * Fair ladies each note At a premium we quote, Which 3'our sweet lips have ever let fall, dears ; We shall honor your draft, And your health shall be quaffed At the supper which follows our ball, dears. Oh ! wonderful beautj' ! Charming, adorable beauty ! May our purses be low, And onr credit so so, When we fail in devotion to beauty. The commander of another gallant corps from the same place selected the lively air of " /'(Z laiher have a guinea than a one, pound note," and chanted his answer thus: — We should feel A great deal. If we made spruce ladies pine ; And our ball, To you all, Shall be extra-superfine ; For the man that for the ladies would not work with heart and hand, We'd reject from out our Mess, and as " unmerchant- able " brand. • Singers. A. M. — Banker. H. L. — Lumber Merchant. A. C. — Notary Public. W. P. — Captain and Advocate. J. C, N. P.— Son of an M. P. W, McC— Major of Vol. Artillery. p. O'C— Captain Irish Volunteers. T. L.— The Inimitable. 54 The Devil's Exfrn. There was no mistake who was to be next singer, when we heard the music of the " The Campbells are coming] " the words of the answer were : Sure the ladies are jesting, oho, oho, When they talk of protesting, oho, oho. For they know we're too fond to depart from our bond, And we've mortgaged our hearts to the fair, the fair. But our deeds shall be mended, oho, oho, EvQ the protest's extended, oho, oho, We'll give them a ball, shall acquit us of all Suspicion of slighting the fair, the fair. The leader of a gallant corps of Irishmen followed. Need we name ''St. Patrick's Bay in the Morning'' as the air to which he sang, — Though rebels around us are making wry faces, The loyal, the brave, and the fair should be gay ; And the thought of begrudging them pleasure disgraces The heart that conceives it on New Year's Day. Then oh if a ball Can please them at all. And light one sunny smile in eyes blue, black or grey; There's no son of our Isle, Whom that one little smile Would not more than repay for the risk we might run, Of disloyalty frowning because we are gay: And bad luck would be ours if the year were begun, Bj neglecting the fair upon New Year's Day. The next answer was j30M;er/w% given; it was from another Irish corps, and the melody chosen was " Through Erin's Isle : " Beyond dispute. You've gained your suit, The Devils Extra. 55 And of our hearts made seizure : In your eyes one sees Retaining fees, And each command's a plea-sure. The court have thought That judgment ought For you to be recorded ; We only pray Ten days delay, And that has been awarded. We'll give a ball ;— to make it gay we try shall ; The learn'd and fair Will all bo there; — Of course Miss Q. and I shall. The replies of the several corps were in the same spirit, but the applause with which the one answer was received frequently continued after the next was begun, and we lost the words of several. In some instances, too, the air was unknown to us. The Marine corps answered with " The Bay of Biscay," we observed that the singer expressed his great respect for old established Customs and held it to be a duty imposed upon him to comply with the wishes of the Ladies. A young gentleman, " in the garb of old Gaul," (with more confidenco than we could have expected from one so young, till we heard that he had a hereditary talent for addressing public bodies with effect), sang to the air of " J Highland lad my love was born"— A statesman was my father born. And all innovation holds in scorn ; And he says that the precedents are most express In favor of acceding to this address. Sing, hey my braw John Highlandraan, Sing, ho my braw John Highlandman, 56 The DcviVs Extra. There'll not be a ball, go where you can, Shall match with the ball of the Highlandman. We then heard, though we cannot remember, a very pointed and polished answer, in a very sharp key, from the " Faugh a ballagh " boj's. The measure appeared to be that of Canning's celebrated " Tell me, knife-grinder ., how you came to grind knives,'" — the air was unknown to us. Perhaps the most exquisite musical treat was the answer of another corps, to an Italian air, which showed that the singer had indeed " swam in a Gondola." As in most Italian airs, it was impossible to catch the words, but the effect of the music was inimitable. At every succeeding answer, however, the gaiety and the uproar increased. Had it not been for the exertions of the Master of the Ceremonies in obtaining silence, we should have been unable to distinguish and record the answer of the three corps of Artillery. This was indeed the '' crowning rose of the whole wreath," and was admirably given by a gentleman who seemed to be well accus- tomed to the Hall. Handel is said to have conceived the idea of introducing cannon into music ; it was reserved for the Volunteer Artillery to carry the conception into effect. The guns were those of the Grand Battery, and the precision with which the accompaniment was given reflected the highest honor on the corps. The singer being accustomed to addresses, had furnished the ladies with an official copy of his answer which enabled them to reply to the same air of " Oh dear, what can the matter be.'' As sure as the powder the bullet despatches, When the bright flame darts into the gnn from our matches, Our bold corps from your bright eyes new energy catches, And quickly will let off a ball. 05- r Bang ! Bang ! ") At a Ball Cupid snatches aye, § } Bang! Bang! vSuch occasions he watches aye, O (_ Bang ! Bang ! ) Gay weddings in batches may Be the sweet fruits of our Ball. The DeviVs Extra. 57 CHORUS OF LADIES. Pleasure and hope in all bosoms are springing now, Soft, lively music in all ears is ringing now, — Ev'ry fair maiden is joj'fully singing now, " All the brave give us a ball." y; f Bang ! Bang ! ") Hark to the feu do joie I g -] Bang! Bang! [-Ga^Mhoughts our souls employ! O (^ Bang I Bang ! j High leap our hearts with joy ! All the brave give us a ball. The music ceased ; the ladies mingled with gentlemen, their graceful and elegant forms and attire contrasting beautifully with the martial garb and manly bearing of the soldier citizens. Brilliantly and dazzlingly " bright lamps shone on fair women and brave men," and yet more brilliantly was the light reflected from brighter eyes. The scene was one of enchantment. A tall gentleman, who had evidently been a soldier, stood close by us ; from the deep interest with which he watched every movement of Miss Quadrille, we conjectured that ho was her relative. We were wright — he was one of " The Lancers. " He told us he had been in the best company in every civilized country, and had seen nothing like the spectacle before him. He was evi- dently excited, and, in fancy, fighting all his bat'Jes o'er again, and we heard him murmuring "None but the brave deserve the fair." We could see but two sour faces; they were near us, and scowled like vampires. Their owners were Miss Mazourka and N. 0. Quadrille. The former we regonised at once as a man in woman's clothes, under which we clearly saw his round- toed unpolished boots, and pepper-and-salt inexpressibles. The latter puzzled us for some time ; it was too coarse for a woman, too puny for a man; its mode of sitting betrayed the secret — it was a tailor in petticoats. The music commenced the waltz in that most sweetly diabolical of operas, Der Freischutz, possibly in compliment 58 The Devils to their Readers. to Us. Our excellent Governor, who never changes his avowed purpose, took the hand of Miss Quadrille; he led her into the centre of the hall ; he kept his word; they danced the first waltz together. Faster and louder came the music on the ear, and quicker and quicker spun the illustrious couple: then the strain fell again ; it became softer and slower, until, as they disappeared through the door-way, it melted gradually away " in a dying, dying fall." At that instant an unexpected salute was fired ; the first report startled us, and — we awoke — it was the morning gun. The cold grey light was peeping through tbe ink-stained windows. We had slept soundly in the editorial chair ; we were initiated into the mysteries of the craft ; we had dreamed a dream, and we could make an article of it. We had not slept in vain — we had only to record our vision in an Extra: We had now something to say, and we have said it. THE DEVILS TO THEIR READERS. Am—" St. Patrick's Day" Though our betters the prayer of Miss Q. have rejected, And send the fair pleader unheeded away, It shall never be said ive the ladies neglecled. Or slighted their cause upon New Year's Day. Through all the year round May all pleasure abound. And the hearts of our patrons be merry and gay ; But there's one little hint That we wish to imprint On the minds of all those on whose bounty we count: It is this — that as all have the "devil to pay," Their regard for the fair will be guessed by the amount Of the presents they make us on New Year's Day. • A. C. The Ladies' Address to the " Inconstants." 59 THE LADIES' ADDRESS TO THE "INCON- STANTS." We saw the Hastings hasting off And never made a fuss ; The Malahars' departure waked No malady in us. Wo were not piqued to lose the Piques; — Each Lady's heart at ease is Altho' the Dees are on the seas, And gone the Hercules-es. Our parting with the Andromaches Like Hector's not at all is ; Nor are we Washingtons to seek To capture a Comwallis. And no Charyhdis ever caught Our hearts in passion's whirls ; — There's not a girl among us all Has ever fished for Pearls. The Vestals with the sacred flame Were not the sparks we wanted ; We"ve looked Medeas in the face And yet were not enchanted. But when our dear Inconstants go Our grief shall know no bounds, The dance shall have no joy for us, The song no merry sounds. Note — H. M. Ships named in these and the following verses wer.:! all in Quebec Harbor in the summer of 1833. Captain Primj commamied the Inconstant, and Commander Hope was his firbt Lieutenant. 60 The Ladies' Address to the " Inconstants.'''' All dismal then will be the Waltz, The dull Quadrille as bad, And wearily we'll hurry through The joyless Gallopade. We'll gaze upon each changeful cloud As through the air it skims, We'll think of fickle fortune's wheel And fashion's turns and whims ; — Sweet emblems oi Inconstancy In each of these we'll find, And our Inconstants constantly We'll fondly bear in mind. — And spite of Durham's fetes and balls, We'll pine and mourn and mope Our long, long winter season through, As girls without a Hope. And when the spring shall come again, Our hearts to pleasure dead Shall sigh for spring without an S, And wish for Pring instead. Unless indeed sweet spring with Hope Those hearts again should bless, And bring our dear Inconstants back And Spring without an S. — Quebec, Gth July, 1838. The " Inconst ants' " Answer. 61 THE " INCONSTANTS' " ANSWER. All language fails to toll how much AYc value your address, Or say how deeply we partalvo The feelings you express. We wonder not the men you name Your hearts have never moved, And quite agree that only wo Are worthy to be loved. Those Hastings are a hasty set And left you in a hurry ; Those Malahars are malapert And hot as Indian curry. The Pearls for whom you must not fish, Are pearls oi price 'tis true, For if you have no golden nets They won't be caught by you. But we Inconstants to the shrine Of youth and beauty bring The countless charms that oven wait On each inconstant thing. The moon, — the summer sky, — the breeze. - The ever-varying sea, — The course of love, — the morning's dream, - The butterfly, — the bee, — The sun himself that round the world. From land to land, doth range, — 62 The " Inconstants' '* Answer. The seasons in their pleasing round Of never-ending change. Are types of us : — but we have yet More lovely ones, for yow, So 3'oung, so fair, so kind, so good — Must be Incomtants too. Forget us, — and lone bachelors We all our lives will be, Condemned to single blcjsedness By your Inconstancy. Be true, — and then the breath of May Shall till our sails, and bring Our willing ship, our eager hearts, And Spring — and Pring — and Ring. And each of you for one of ours Shall change her maiden name, And as we're all Inconstants, you Ot course will be the same. Kamouraska, August, 1838. Sonnet. G3 SONNET. To my wife — with the British Poets. Love is like poetry, both lend the hue Peculiar to themselves to all they touch, And clothe it with a loveliness all new, A strange but most delightful sweetness. Such The beauty by the pictured window shed On the cold walls of some cathedral aisle, Tinting the sculptured relics of the dead, Till marble dames and warriors seem to smile. As love's first offering for the new-born year, This Volume, rich in Britain's choicest song. No inappropriate tribute will appear From him whose fondest prayer shall be, that long As life is thine, thy days and years may be Made fair and bright by love's sweet poesy. 64 Canadian Pic-nic Song. CANADIAN PIC-NIC SONG. Boat Song. * Air — YOLE MON CCEUR VOLE. Cheerly as the day begun ; See how bright the glittering snow- Sparkles in the merry sun ; On a pic-nic let us go. Hamel's house has had its sway, And Lake Beauport and Lorette, What shall be the place to-day ? Montraorenci's left us yet. REFRAIN. "What to-morrow '11 be we know not, But to-day's our own, We shall lose it if we go not. To the smooth, tall Cone. Bustle, boy, our things to find. All the marche clones now are ready ; Skins before and tails behind, Jingling bells and drivers steady. What to-morrow, &c, Now we're muffled warm and well, Sprightly talk and laugh and song Of our merry purpose tell, As we gaily spank along. What to-morrow, &c. • A Canadian Boat Song consists of an indefiaite number of very simple verses; each verse after the first beginning with the repetition of tlie last couplet of the preceding one ; the singer frequently composes as he proceeds. The air has three long notes answering to the long vowels in the words " day's our own " — and " smooth tall cone." Canadian Pic-nic Song. 65 At a g-uUaiit (lushing- rate Now wo i-attlc (liroiigh llic town, 'Till wc roac-h old Palace (late, Then the hill wo soanipor town. What lo-niori'ow, &o. Swiftly pass wo o'er the ico, Soon wo gain the Boau])Oi't shore, Trotting on 'till in a (rice The Cone is gained, — the journey's o'oi-. What to-nioiTow, (\:c. How each little ragamuffin Counts our coppers all his own, — As the hidies i)anting, ])uffing, Slowly climb the slij)por3' Cone, What to-morrow, &.Q. Each upon her tiny car, Lik'o an avalanche thev m Down the icv hill :ind I'ar O'er the snowy plain below. What to-morrow, kc. Now again the course they try, Toiling up the glassy steoj), Gain the to]), and from on high Swift as arrows down they sweep. What to morrow, &c. Thus wo ])ass our pleasant time, Frost and fun our hearts elating, Down wo slide and u|) wo climl.i 'Till wo hoai" that— dinner's wailing. What to-mori'ow, &c. 66 Canadian Pic-nic Song, See the crowded table spread, Flesh and fowl and fruit and fish ; — That we might be duly fed Every guest has brought a dish. What to-morrow, &c. Every house has something sent, Pies and puddings, cakes and sweets, All good cheer they represent. Quite a Parliament of meats. What to-morrow, &c. Ladies fair have made the tea Beaux politely hand about; Savageau with eager glee Draws his nimble fiddle out. What to-morrow, &c. Listen to the merry din, Galopade, quadrille and waltz; How we caper, how we spin, No one flags and no one halts. What to-morrow, &c. But the hour of starting's come, For the East is growing red ; Beauteous belles must think of home, Brilliant beaux must go to bed. What to-morrow, &c. As in sleep again we slide And of future pic-nics dream, Down a shadowy Cone to glide Phantom boys with sledges seem. What to-morrow, &c. I I An Album's Petition. 6*7 AN" ALBUM'S PETITION. To each dear friend and kind relation Of its mistress, — of what nation Thej^ may bo soe'er, and whether Known or not, — to all togetlier, Young or old, or dull or witt}-, Eic'h or poor, or plain or prett}', A modest begging book's memorial Ilumbl}' shewoth — That to glory, al Who its pages will adorn Shall be by its pages borne, And go down to future times With the author of these rhymes, — —They who're young may write about Love's sweet dream and anxious doubt ; And they who have been long on earth May tell us what that dream is worth. They who have the brains and wit On many a brilliant thought can hit, And they who've not can borrow one From the good king Solomon. They who're rich can paj' at will. For another artist's skill, But they who're poor, unhappy elves, Must try to write or draw themselves. They who're pretty, if they're wise, Their beauty wMU immortalize By having each bewitching look, Glowingly copied in this book ; — To those who're plain 'twill bo a duty To show how wit surpasses beauty. 68 To my Sister. Come ladies fair, and gentlemen, Wield the pencil or the pen, You can fill me if you try ; — "Write or draw, or cut or buy. Verse or picture, ])ro.se or print. Act on a gentle al bum's hint ; Give my mistress sometning clever, For itself she'll love it ever ; Or if it be of those that perish. For your sake yonv gift she'll cherish ; So shall your production be Made famous by its place in me. — Be of my requests observant And my lady is your servant ; Accede to them witiiout delay. And your petitioner shall pray ; &c., &c., &c. TO xMY SISTER. In joy, in grief, in laughing safety's day, In frowning danger's hour, when blank dismay Filled sterner hearts than ours, — we two have been Companions my sweet sister; — tho' we part In person, still I know that heart to heart Will speak and answer ever: write and tell All that may grieve or please thee, knowing well That all that pains or joys or interests thine Pains, joys or moves this faithful heart of mine. New Years Address— \S3d. 69 NEW YEAE'S ADDRESS. Quebec Transcript, 1839. A steam steel pen of fifty poet power, Kind patrons, scarce could tell you what wo feel ; — Poetic parturition's trying hour First comes upon us now. Could we reveal The throbs and throes which seem the only dower That bright Apollo gives to those who kneel Before his shrine, we think no luckless wight Who ne'er wrote verse before would venture verse to write. We are not hardened devils lilce to those Who run from door to door with the Gazette ; Their seventy years have taught them to compose In verse without an effort, we, as yet, Scarce count a twelve month since our Transcript rose To give the world its light ; — but e'er it set (Some hundred 3"cars from hence) we hope that we " Most sweet, enchanting bards," like them, shall surely be To you the first-born offspring of our Muse We dedicate and leave withont a name : Baptize it as you will, — we'll not refuse. The name you give : — to pleasure you it came ; For Godfathers and Godniothers we choose Our paper's patrons : — it it's quite the same To you. to us we own it would be pleasant You'd give its authors each some little christening present. Let other devils tell you what the year That died last night was famous for; — ^the rise Of foul Rebellion and its brief career; — 70 New Year's Address — 1839. How mighty Durham charmed our wandering eyes With gold, while silvery accents on the ear Pour'd golden promises ; — or to the skies Extol the pomp that graced the celebration Of our fair, young, good Queen Victoria's coronation. Or let them tell how judges were suspended For thinking Special Councils might be wrong ; — How well our martial citizens defended Our country from the sympathizing throng ; — How those whose labours ought to have amended Their countrymen, must sing their New Year's song Through prison bars ; — our earnest hope must be That time will prove their hearts from impious treason free.* For us the year has had one great event That swallows up the rest,— the Transcripts birth :— If to your vacant moments it hath lent The charm of poesy ; if flowers of worth Transplanted to its pages have been sent To grace your evening hours with harmless mirth, It seeks no better praise, no more renown : — Upon your smiles it lives,— it dies if you should frown ! Generous patrons, kind and true, Each of us to each of you, For this joyous season wishes Appetite and savoury dishes ; Health and wealth and Christmas cheer, And a happy, happy year. 8pme Editors had got into trouble. New Year's ^(Wress— 1839. 71 A. W. TO M. K. "We may or may not meet again, I may or may not see Thy foco again or hear thy voice, but I forget not thee : Our friendship's not of ancient date, no kindred forms our tie. And yet I seem to know thee well and love the tenderly. Thou wast my guest when first I called a husband's house my home ; I cannot think of that sweet time but what thy form will come Before my fancy and my heart with pleasant memoi-ies move, Thou dear and cherished friend of those whom I am proud to love. Forget not thou that pleasant time when much that met our view. To thee as to myself was strange and beautiful as new, Twill please me if whene'er thine eye this simple verse surveys Like me thou reckonest that time among thine happy days. May the rich blessing of our God who is all truth and love, Be round thy path and guide thy feet wherever they may rove, Thy virtuous thoughts bear fruit in deeds, thine errors be forgiven, Thine home be happy while thou liv'st — thy home of homes be heaven. NEW YEAES ADDEESS. Quebec Gazette, 1839. Goddess of the sage and witty, "Whom thy democratic city Worshipped haj)pily of yore, Till Demagogues and faction tore. 72 New Year's J AZress— 1839. The bond of peace; — And, thus divided, Hei" Sons, " misguiding or misguided, " Became the dupes and prey of those Who holding all Athenians foes, Fomenting discords — parting fi-iends The better to attain their ends, Kept their own interest still in view, As Yankee Sympathisers do ; While Philip held a neutral tone As Yankee Presidents have done. Bright Goddess, come — if wisdom yet Delights thee — here's the last Gazette; Or if thy other art appears More charming — see our Volunteers! Since Cadmus' day, so fine a set Of sudden soldiers never yet Rose at a word. It seemed Sir John. With serpents' teeth the land had sown. While thus we sang the Goddess came, But as in olden time the dame Appeared to mortals in the guise Of him whom they esteemed most wise, So now she took her ancient way And came — the Mentor of our daj' — * The man whom all our factions own For moderation stands alone ; 'Who, if his creed be something changed On abstract questions, — never ranged Beyond the pale of loyalty. * John Neilson the first English Editor in Canada. New Years Address— \?>'i^. 73 He thought the mass of men might bo P^ntrustod with the destinies Of Nations — for he was too wise T'abuse the power, and kindly thought All felt like him and as they ought; 'Till stubborn facts and mob excess Compelled him to csteeth them less And put off his democracy 'Till all should be as wise as he. When thus Minerva had put on The likeness of our " glorious John, " She, while our knees with reverence shook, A slightly Scottish accent took. And kindlj' prompted what to say To Patrons kind on New Year's day, And taught poor devils to rehearse The year's events in simple verse. When the last year its course began, Disorder thro' the country ran, And to Eebellion's usual brood Was added foul ingratitude; Anentcd, That Harriet Fletcher liath consented To keep an Album which she sentls For contribution to her friends, — And whereas it importeth much, The contributions should be such As ought in Albums to appear — We have in special council here, Ordained, enacted, and directed Each contribution be inspected By E. T. F., and be rejected, If when he comes to look it o'er He thinks he's seen its face before. And be it furthermore ordained That no admission shall be gained By any verses imcomplete In decent rhymes, or short of feet ; Or drawings, where a rose receives, A lily's stalk and poppy leaves, Or music which performance mars By disregarding time and bars : But, saving this, we will that all Be taken — if original; — Provided that each contribution Admitted to the Institution. For reading, looking at, or fiddling. Be classed as " good " or " bad " or By the inspector, who shall brand Such class upon it, out of hand. middling Birthday Sonnet. 83 And lurtbcr, that as love in rhyme Is apt to waste his bruins and time, And Bachelors if let alone Will rhyme upon no theme but one, Love versos to And books of nameless Ladies fuli nameless ladies ,- , ,, pruhibited. Are apt to be exceeding dull ; — It is ordained that none shall dare To write on love to any fair, Uidess he prove his passion's strength By giving all her names at length. Proviso. Provided always, and it is Tlie true intent and sense of (his, That it shall be th' Inspector's duly To tind vast wisdom, wit and beaut}-, In each foregoing clause and line And brand this Ord'nance " Suj^erfine.'' BIIITIIDAY SONNET. To H. F., with Comperes Poems. A bard unmarried, Harriet, might, jierchancc. A volume of a warmer tone have sent, Some rhyme of love and passion, some romance Of hope and fear and joy and rapture blent : But 1 have but an elder brother's voice To wish thee years and hours of health and peace And therefore for a Birthdaj- gift m.y choice Hath fallen one whoso numbers never cease To praise our calmer joys, who was content With virtue for a theme, and wove a strain Whose grave rebuke or harmless merriment, 84 The Carrier's Address, 1847. Eeproved or laughed at vice and folly's reign. Among the volumes which thy boudoir grace The Sofa's bard may hold a worthy place. H December, 1839 Most gentle Reader, — ■ Was Cowper's Calvini.stic creed all right ? Was I predestined ere I saw the light To make and send th' above delightful sonnet ? Were you foredoomed to smile or frown upon it ? Or did his creed err ? THE CAERIER'S ADDRESS. Quebec Oazette, \st January, 1847. Hark! once again the midnight chime, Hath given a solemn tongue to Time, And the last tone of yonder bell Hath bid the vanished year farewell ; Grone like all years before, and cast In the wide Gulf we call the Past 1 Yet that the year's influence may extend Far hence to time's remotest end, And future good or ill may fix Its earliest root in " forty six." Shall he have cause to grieve or laugh, Who writes the dead year's epitaph ? Let's see — Her Majesty the Queen (Whom may God prosper) hath not seen It fitting in this year to bless The Carrier's Address, 85 John Bull witli Prince or with Princess. But yet we trust that bets are even, We've one or both in forty-seven. Princes, the King of Prance has throught, Are getting scarcer than they ought, And that the royal Crown of Spain, Might fit a Bourbon's head again ; So sends his sons to fetch the Bride, With hopes of Crown and wealth beside, And though the British Lion's growl Somewhat disturbs ths G-allic fowl, France braves the storms that o'er her lower And turns for comfort to the dower. — Cracow, tlie Autocrats agree, Had better be no longer free, And though the Lion threats her foes And Gallia's Bird against them crows. Poor Cracow's glory's past away Till freedom hails a brighter day. Old Uncle Sam cares nought for this, Th' affair he thinks is none of his; And holds it very little odds Which way old Europe's " balance " nods. Provided that same balance scheme Molest not his ambitious dream, And that no Prince or Queen assume a Eight to the Halls of Montezuma. For Uncle Sam hath modestly Eesolved that these his own shall be. — Our " balance " here is rather nice And may be upset in a trice ; Lord Elgin will not find two pins 86 The Carrier s Address. Of odds of weight' twixt outs and ins, So even do their chances seem, That either yet may kick the beam. Much worlc (between ourselves and you) The Gracious Lord will have to do ; And if he satisfies the claims Of every party, — if he names Men to each office, who shall be From all objection whoUj' free, — If he shall fill the public chest, By means that all shall own the best, — If he to Parliament shall send Measures that all men shall commend, — If under him our troubles cease And jarring factions work in peace, — If on the " College question," he Shall get all interests to agree, — If Baldwin shall be hand in glove With Sherwood, — if Lafontaine move A vote of confidence in Draper And laud each Ministerial paper, — If Williams' verdict shall attest The Ministerial " Channel " best, And Armstrong own that none but Turks Would vilify the Board of Works, — If Gtjgy shall with pen and tongue, Indite the praise of Colonel Young, — If editors in Montreal Shall cease among themselves to brawl. Until our own old '' Glorious John " Has nothing to comment upon, — He will, (wc speak with all respect,) Do quite as much as we expect. The North Shore Railroad. 8*7 Patrons and friends, the bygone yeai-, Hath left one little score to clear ; Thi'ough wind and rain, thro' cold and sun, Oar weary round we've daily run , From south and north, from west and east. We've brought the intellectual feast : We hope some proof that not in vain. We've faced the wind, sun, cold and rain, — Some token that our work of love You've deigned to notice and approve. Carriers love Cash — We say no more; We've proved youi- generous hearts before. And bright and blissfull may your New Year be, From every care and every surrow free ! — THE NORTH SHORE RAILROAD. Qiiehec Gazette, 1857. Dear Mr. Editor. I know I have no right to appear in verse more than once a year, and that my time for this year is past ; but as I trudge through the streets distributing your invaluable lucubrations to every body, every bod}' tvHl talk to me about the Rail-road, and really the poetic fire within will consume me if I do not give it vent; — pray print me then, and I will carry you about with double diligence. I am, Dear Mr. Editor, With profound respect, One of the humblest of 3'our devils, A. B. C- What is it that awakes my Ij're, And tills me with unwonted fire ? The thing to which all hopes aspire ; Our Rail-road. 88 The North Shore Railroad. What's that on which we all agree, Old Nestor* within the " Journal " free, And Cauchon with the Mercury ? Our Eail-road. At whose success we'd all be glad, The Tory, moderate, or the rad, All sects and sorts (except the mad) — Our Rail-road. What will be far the surest plan, To keep us loyal to a man, And make us laugh as Jonathan ? Our Rail-road. What will the provinces unite In real union, firm and tight. And keep us Rritish and all right ? Our Rail road. What, if we don't the boon refuse. Will forward every body's views, And make us all as rich as Jews ? Our Rail-road. What will convey our wood and grain At every season to the main. And bring us British goods again Our Rail-road. What will the rapid steam cars dash on To Bring us London's newest fashion And gratify dear woman's passion ? Our Rail-road. I most humbly crave your pardon, Mr. Editor, for this poetic license. iVew Year's ^ (/(//-ess— 1849. 89 What may perhaps do something more, And to mis-used Quebec restore The rank she held in daj-s of yore ? * Our Eail-road. And then perchance it may befall, Our -J- wives shall hear the pleasant call. To grace Lord Liberal's Castle Ball : Dear Eail-road ! Then let us heart and hand combine, And ail in one great effort join, To urge this wonder-working lino Of Eail-road. NEW YEAE'S ADDEESS. Pilot, 1849 ') Huzza ! fsr the Pilot that weathered the storm, — Huzza ! for Lord Elgin — Huzza ! for Eeform, — Huzza! for our Ministers, honest and able, — Huzza ! for the measures they'll lay on the table, — Huzza! for the Session that's going to be, The Session the Province is longing to see, — Huzza ! for ourselves, who in prophecy bold, In oui- last New- Year's Ehj-me, all this triumph foretold, Proving thus that in gifts, if no longer in name. The Poet and Pi'ophet are ever the same. * The Seat of Government. f Another poetsc license for me, JMr. Editor, hut remember I shall he a rich man then (tlianks to the Rail -road) and Lord Liberal may choose to for- get I was a poor devil once, it he knows 1 was always an honest one. 90 Neic Year's Address— \M'^. Huzza I for iho friends that stood steadily b}', — Huzza ! for Lamartine — Huzza ! for Pope Pius, — Huzza ! for the Banner of Freedom unfurl'd. For the good of all nations, the weal of the world ; — Huzza ! louder than all for our own native land, For its cheerful obedience to lawful command, For the best Constitution the world ever saw, — Huzza ! for the people, the Queen and the Law ! And, huzza ! for the men that assist the attack Of the Communist's doctrine : — long live Cavaignao. We haven't got much, but we'd like to retain it, Not divide with the boys that did nothing to gain it, Nor sharing oui- New Year's emoluments sweet, Will) the first lagamuffins we find in the street. But this is digression, — our present vocation Is to deal in poetical vaticination. The Session that's coming shall ever be blest, As the longest, the wisest, the greatest, the best: Mr. Baldwin shall make all our Colleges flourish, LaFontaine shall justice and equity noui-ish,— Mr. Drummond all crimes shall detect and repress, Mr. Blake 1.II abuses expose and redress, — Mr. Morin shall charm us with eloquent words, — Mr. Caron shall do the same thing in the Lords, — Mr. Leslie shall answer all questions and calls, Mr. Merritt shall give all kinds of canaivJs, — Messrs. Cameron and Tache make bridges and roads, In all sorts of places, and all sorts of modes, — Mr. Viirer shall lessen our national debt — A thing that no tory has ever done yet, — Mr. Hinks shall make perfect our Eepresentation, Shall get us Free Trade too, and Free Navigation, — Shall the duties impose in so charming a way, New Yen7-'s Address— 1?>49. 91 'Twill be bliss to receive them and pleasure to pay, — Witb siK'b exquisite tact lie tlie Tariff shall fill, It shall ^-hidden John Glas^ and please Peter M'Mill ; — He shall issue Debentures (a marvellous thing), That shall pay themselves off with the profit they bring ; — Libel law shall amend that the Press may be free, And that men may write truth witliout fear of Gugee ; — He shall make us all rich :--but if thus we run on, In foretelling his deeds, we shall never have done. If you know what is good for our country, you know \Yhat he'll think, sa}', and do, and — Amen, be it so ! Having thus drawn aside the dark curtain of State, And unveiled the designs of political fate — Having speechified from our poetical throne, Which we hold (more's the pity) for one day alone, We come to the point, which, in all thronal speeches, The great end of Government touchingl}' teaches ; Tho' a point of vast import in few words it lies — " Dear L.vdies and Gentlemen grant us Supplies: " You know what the Carrier's necessities are, — We'll accept of Debentures, and take them at jxir ! 92 The Carriers Carol— for 1849. THE CAEEIEE'S CAEOL— FOE 1849. Quebec Gazette. Amid the crash of thrones and flight of Kings, — The downfall of timehonor'd thoughts and things, — 'Mid violence baffling freedom's brfghtest hope, — And the brave efforts of the liberal Pope ; — 'Mid Eebel outbreaks and the fiery gleam Of Towns bombarded, and Italia's dream Of adding one more nation to the list : — 'Mid Eed Eepublican and Communist, — 'Mid democratic movements near and far, — And lurid portents of impending war, — A 3'ear hath passed and ended ; — heaven be praised. The withering storm hath j-et but lightly grazed Our British Parent, while ourselves have gazed Untouched spectators of the wreck around, In tempered freedom safe, by love and duty bound ! True, our funds are rather low. And Debentures do not go Quite so readily at par As we could have wished, — yet far Be it from our thoughts to grumble : In the universal tumble We have lost in cash and labors Less than many of our neighbors : That is the Province has — for we. Imps as we are known to be, With a deep affliction mourn O'er our lamented Patron's Urn ! * Would we could raise his cenotaph And there inscribe this Epitaph I •John Neilson. The Carriers Carol— for 1849. 93 THE EPITAPH. An lu)iK's( man lies here, — not falsely bland, But kind in very deed and ti-ue in liearl, With nnbong'ht zeal who >scrv^ed our native land, And not for office played the Patriot's part. Wielding with easy power his trusty j)en, Keen witliout gall, without unkindness free, His aim to raise and servo his fellow men, He tempered censure aye with eourtes}'. Our counti-y weeps in him her sagest friend. The press its ancient ornament and pride; — In us all mournful thoughts and feelings blend. Guide, friend and master lost when Neilscn died. When in our final case we lie. Knocked out o^ form and into jot, May we a like impression leave ; Like proof of love may we receive, And inky Imps our praise rehearse, In honest if in rugged verse! But we must not be gloomy — the New Year is come, And the Session is coming, to make us all glad. For our Ministers (bless them !), with trumpet and drum, Have proclaimed tnat they'll I'id us of everj' thing bad, And will give us all good things, — a College, and Cash, And a new Judicature, no second-hand hash But a spic and span new one, — and free Navigation To make us a mighty magnificent nation. New Taxes, new Duties, new Incorporation Of Cities and Boroughs, and new Eegistration ; — Of Post Office matters a new Eegulation, New Districts, new Counties, new Eeprescntation, New School laws ensuring us Illumination, 94 Ihe Carriers Carol—fur 1849. New Census Bills giving us new information, New schedules of Salaries, working vexation (With a salvo, of course, for their own preservation) To overpaid phicemen, and great tribulation ; New schemes for our Eeveinie's vast augmentation, For increasing industrious and sound population By encouraging Settlement and Immigration, That is by addition and multiplication ; — And many more things which need verification ! Dont t we wish we may get them ? — no matter ! we'll hope : — Who'd have thought Reformation would comefrom the Pope ' If they do all this good and remove all these evils. We'll all turn Eesponsible Government d Is; We'll hurra for LaFontaine and Baldwin,— we'll take The oath of allegiance to Drummond and Blake, — We'll confess (as the Pilot apparently thinks) That there may be some good in our friend Mr. Hincks, We'll believe that there's virtue in Leslie and Price, And that Tache and Cameron are free from a vice. Patrons, may the coming year Find and leave you happy here ; And, life ended, may you be Happy through eternity. Do you wish such happiness ? Seek your fellow men to bless. Would you, now that cash is rare, Invest at interest high, yet fair? — "What's given to the poor is lent On better terms, than cent per cent, — And on these terms, poor way-worn elves, — "We'll take a trifling loan ourselves The Steam Excavator or Patent Irishman. 95 THE STRAM EXCAVATOR OE PATENT IRISHMAN. The following poem, vvns wi-iden expressly for a young gcn- llcnuin at Upper Canada College, as an a))pendix to his Theme on this subject; the Ode tlio' not sti-ictl}' Hoiatian. expresses my admii-ation for ihis JnvtMition. T am proud to Ha}' that it obtaii.ed the ajtphiuse of Dr. Scadding who marked it as "Good " worthy of Ilildebert." AD EXCAVATOREM. 0, Excavator nobilis ! O, Machina mirabilis! Qua) longe ante alias, is, * Potentior Ilibernicis, lu terram foiiiendo ! E patria Yankeorum, Venisti ut laborum Levamen sis nostrorum, Et versuum meorum, Tutamen in canendo ! Te pueri circumstantes, Te senes et infantes, Aspcctu Jubilantes, Ingenio triumphantes, Laudabunt in videndo ! Virtutes, quas navrare, Nee laudibus roquare, JSTec versibus can tare, Non credo me prasstare, — Mirabor in silendo ! * Ab " Eo. 96 The Carrier's Ohaunt- -1S50. THE CAREtER'S CHAUNT, Quebec Gazette, January, 1850. Oil ! had we a Pegasus willing and able, — We'd mount him and ride ; but there's none in oui- stable. So we'll e'en take a bint from balloon-loving Gale, Who proposes in search of poor Fi-anklin to sail : Our balloon shall be made out of last j^ear's Gazette. And our gas be the hope that you will not forget The poor Imps who hav^e brought it you. (Thanks to our Mayoi- We might get real gas if we'd co])pers to spare.) And thus mounting on high, we at 'vantage may cast. A glance o er the future, the present and past. We are up — we can see over all forty-nine With its good deeds and bad, from the Pole to the Line. Towards the future, dark clouds seem to limit our view, But with breaks here and there we shall try to peep through. We see anarchy nipping young Liberty's bud, And " baptizing the first birth of freedom in blood, " Upsetting each landmark and tried constitution, And rejecting Reform to embrace Revolution. We see France preaching fraternization and hope To her brethren at Rome, and — restoring the Pope ! We see Christians engaging in butcher-like work,* And the victims of tyranny — saved by the Turk ! f We see Pestilence march with her death-flag unfurl'd Spreading fear and dismay o'er three-fourths of the world, 'Till the Angel of Mercy came down to their aid At the cry of the lands, and the Demon is stay'd ; — Now the bright gleam of hope hath succeeded despair. And man's gratitude breathes in thanksgiving and praj'or. * At the Holy Sepulcre ! f Kossuth, &c. The Carriers Chaunt—lSf>0 91 Why from Canada last? Hath she none to express? Was hov strait not as sore ? Is her tlianksgiving less ? But perhaps my Lord Elgin was waiting to see What liis fate with the Torontowegians would be. True, we've plagues enough left, but they're such as wo may With a will and an effort sweep deftly away ; And there's good with the bad : — While we're up in the sky Both the good and the bad we can readily spy, And as each meets our view we shall just jot it down ; — We can't handle the globe like Commissioner Brown, Wo see our ovation crown'd Governor, who Is eggregi (o) us Professor of dignified — whew ! — With one hand he rewardeth the Rebels who tried Annexation by force in their insolent pride; With the other chastiseth the men who are seen Humbly seeking the same thing by leave of the Queen : While Ben-Holmes, more consistent, resisted the force, But applaudeth the thing in its peaceable course ! — We see our Responsibles handling the pelf, And each taking good care of his friends and himself. We see the five U's that embellish our City, Standing each for a Chiseller cunning and witty ; Chauveau, Chabot and Cauchon, and Caron, — and then The great Chiseller of Chisollers, our own CITIZEN.* Number one is a turbulent, troublesome boy, But he's not a bad chisel — ask Circuit Judo-e Roy. Number two's mode of working was clever tho' queer, E'or the chiselled himself into Chief Engineer ! Number three in a Pilot-boat followed the sport, 'Till he found himself out a snug berth in our Port. Number four most of all by his chiselling gains Getting rid of the work while the profit remains. Robert Christie, Esq. 7 98 The Carriers Chmmt—lSoO Number five on economy writes, and on history With a certain gold pen about which there's a mystery: Standing chief among Chisellers, aloof and alone, And doubling the pay of the House — and his own. But there en revanche, stands our excellent Mayor, Oar four times unanimous choice, whose good care Hath enlightened our City with Gas, and who sought her Health, safety and profit, by seeking for water; (Employing a Baldwin who hated a job. And so differed in that from responsible Bob,) And hath tried party feeling and quarrels to smother Until cit should meet cit as a friend and a brother. We see Annexation — But stop, through the cloud We've a glimpse of the future, — that future is proud. No stripe sullied flag doth our Citadel deck, But the Standard of Britain waves over Quebec ; Montreal hath regained her old mercantile fame, And her sons have abandonned their errors and shame ; Toronto gleams bright in prosperity's sun. And the trade of the West hath been tried for and won ; Of the tide of good luck the Kingstonians drink ; And the new seat of Government's — where do you think ? We may not tell more, — but it has but ojie seat, (And that one in the place that's most fitting and meet) And no more like the softest of members is found Which between its two seats tumbles bump to the ground. And Lord Elgin is off — and all parties are tired Of bemiring each other, and getting bemired; Even Editors argue, as Editors should, Not for argument's sake, but for Canada's good, And have found that a Country is little or great, Not because it's a Colony, Province or State, The Carrier's Chaun f— 1 85 99 But that wise men attain to the end they're pursuing, Not b}' talking or begging, but thinking and doing ; That the best of all ways Cape Misfortune to weather, Is a long pull, a strong pull, a pull all together. Is this glimpse of the future too bright to be true ? — Ask 3'ourselves, — the solution depends upon you. We dislike not the Yankees, they're clever and brave. But the blot on their scutcheon's the whip and the slave; Let them banish the stripes when the stars are unfurl'd, And their flag may compete with the pride of the world ; "With the red cro3s of Albion it then may go forth, As the banner of freedom, and wisdom and worth. Let them Winthrop elect and their Congress shall be The boast of Columbia, the hope of the free ; Let them list to his counsels, their Eagle shall rise With his pinions unfetter'd, and soar to the skies. And now again we rest on earth And hear the sounds of human mirth : Seasonable sounds of glee, Laugh and jest and revelry. But cold and rough the wind doth blow And sharp the frost, and deep the snow And many in winter's season rude Lack clothing, shelter, fire and food. Give then, ye rich ones, to the poor ; — The gift shall large increase ensure, Eeturning thus your offered gold In blessings rich and manifold. Would ye for mercies numberless, Your gratitude to Heaven express ? The most acceptable thanksgiving, Js worthy, holy. Christian living; 100 The Little Exliibition of 1854. And of the Christian virtues three The chief and best is charity. Better than penance, prayer or shrift, Is Gtod's delight, the cheerful gift ! And dont forget, that cold and wet, Or faint with heat, the CAEEIER poor, Hath toiled his way, from day to day. To bring your Neilson to your door, And cometli now to wish you all good cheer, A merrj^ Christmas, and a happy year I THli: LITTLE EXIIlBITrON OF 1854. A Riddlu for M. P. P.'s of both Houses. Sic vos non vobis — Virg : A little man did make a Gun. A very sorry thing, The barrel weak, the stock awry, A lock with crazy spring. And on the back side of the stock, A silver plate put he. Marked " eighteen hundred fifty-four " And " Fecit, L. T. D. " He laid the Gun before the men "Who judge of things like these, They thought it bad, and yet they wished. The little man to please. The Little Exhibition of 1854. 101 For twice bci'orc in vain ho tried, The public prize to ^natc•ll, And three long years had toiled awa}', That luckless Gun to ])a{ch. They gentl}' hinted, that thej' would For some good workmen send, — Who might in some particulars. Stock, lock, and barrel mend. So said, so done, — those woi-kmen made A barrel so and and slick, A stock right good, of walnut wood, A lock as lightning quick. But on the backside of the stock, That jilate you still may see. Marked " eighteen hundred fifty-four " And " Fecit, L. T. I). " The little man who feared the work, For his might seem too good, Stiffened the lock, — the barrel sci'atched. And scraped the vanished wood. But still the thing was capital, A fii'st rate shooting gun, The Judges gave the prize, — and all Applauded what they'd done. The little man he struts about, As any peacock proud. Parades the Gun, and shews the prize, His boasts are long and loud. 102 The Little Exhibition of 185-1. If any man presume to doubt, That his the work could be, He points unto that silver plate. And shews him '^ L. T. D." The skilful workmen are forgot, And few maj^ know their name, Theirs was the work, — the little man's The profit and the fame. Interpretation Clause. Put " Bill " for " Gun,"— be wide awake,— Thou clever M. P. P. And tell me who the workmen were?— And who was L. T. D — ? M. P. P. thinks a little and then guesses right. " Eureka" shout, — thou'st found it out. Thou cleverest of men ! — Eight well, I say,— in wordy fray, Thou'lt earn thy one pound ten ! The Carrier's Coalition Address. 103 THE CAEEIEE'S COALITION ADDEESS. Midnight, \95i-b — Quebec Gazette. "God bless the master of this house, And mistress also ; And all the little children That round the table go ; With their pockets full of money, And their cellars full of beer — And God send you all a Happy New Year." Tolls thai loud bell for fifty four, Or doth it welcome fifty-five ? Mourns it the year that is no more, Hails it the year that's now alive ? Mourns it for England's, France's brave ? Knells it o'er valour's early grave ? Or peals it cheerly through the night For Inkerman's all-glorious fight ? Tolls it for Elgin who is gone, And all the good he might have done ? Or greets it him who rules instead, Our untried, welcome, hopeful Head ? We cannot say — for good and evil Come now so mixed that we, the Devil, (Of the Gazette) can hardly say Whether we should be grave or gay. Wo would, perhaps, McNab abide, If Drummond sat not by his side ; xlnd charniiiig Cay icy might appear If Chabot were nut (|uiLe so near ; 104 The Carrier's Coalition Address. (How in silk gown so spruce and new Will he the Law-Brickla3'ing do?) Macdonald would rejoice our sight If Morin sat not on his right : Bob Spence would far more pleasing show, Were he not linked with dull Chauveau ; — E'en honest, jolly Smith looks cross, Clapped cheek by jowl with blundering Eoss- Is there no chance our British men Should ever get their rights again ! Is Lowei Canada so low, That her best man is P. Chauveau ; Her lawyers so extremely small, That Drummond overtops them all ; In her wide confines is there not An engineer can beat Chabot; Is genius to her clime so foreign That her first specimen is Morin ? Ma}" her good freemen never hope, That one or two at least may sit In council, who mistrust the Pope, Nor cringe to Priest or Jesuit ? Shall our good city never be Cleansed of that odious A. B. C. ? Yet there is one unminglcd good — One shadowless and sunny spot, Smooth, cat like Eolph is out and gone. To pestle, pill and gallipot : — However bad the rest may be, They are not half so bad as he. The Carriers Coalition Address. 105 Our rulers have three little l>ills To prop their fame and cure our ills : They boast of Eeciprocity And how they'll make the Yankees pay, But Jonathan's as 'cute as we, And that may turn the other ^Yay. They boast they've linished the Eeserves, And well they ma}- — but there, methinks, A greater gun the meed deserves, The great tcn-thousand-pounder Hi neks. Whipp'd Lewis brags about his Bill. We might as well be told The patient made the Doctor's pill That cured him of his cold. He swallowed it — the thing was good — No man hath e'er gainsay ed it. He swallowed well, but— *by the Eood.* He should'nt say he made it. But truce to Ministerial tricks, And truce to dirty politics, And truce in and out ; Apart from these, the gentlemen Are just as good as nine in ten, And generous souls no doubt: So as their Poets Laureate, wo Expect from tiiem a double fee. ' Note.— The Editor, a modest man, put this in,— our own phrase was more energetic and our rhyme and metre quite as good ; but the Editor thought it unpolite, and savouring to much of TuE Devil. 106 Address— Patriotic Fund, 1855. To them and all Happy Year, A cellar full of foaming beer An'l lots of Christmas Pies ; And if our Budget you approve, Kind Patrons, then we humbly move You grant us the Supplies. Poor suppliants to your doors we come. Our Estimate's the usual sum. But 3^et we should be glad, If, seeing beef and bread and wood Are very dear, you only should A moderate Bonus add ! ADDEESS. The Patriotic Fund Committee to their fellow citizens. Ye sons of Britain, Ireland, France, Whose brethren side by side advance Against the ruthless Cossack lance. And freedom's foe ; The wives and orphans of the brave. Whose valour earned a soldier's grave, Appeal to you to help and save From want and woe. For they who fell on Alma's height. Or Balaclava's hero fight. Or died for freedom, God and right. At Inkermann, Stretched on the soldier's bloody bier, Bequeathed you those they held most dear, Tli^t you might dry tl^e mourner's tear. As Christians can. Address— Patriotic Fund, 1855. 107 Your bretlii-en strive on battlefield, Who best his country's arms shall wield, Who first shall force the foe to j'ield, Or bravely die : Strive yo, who first and best shall be In the great work of charit}^ To sooth by generous sj^mpathy, The mourner's cry. By Erin's Harp and Shamrock green, — By bonnio Scotland's Tartan sheen, — By England's Eose, — by Britain's Queen, (Long may she live !) By the red cross your fathers bore To victor}' on every shore. By Gallia's glorious tricolor, — Give, — freely give. Give, — and so may the hallowed gold Eeturn to you a hundred fold, And blessings and rewards untold, To you be given : To succor in their deep distress, The widow and the fatherless, Is virtue's purest happiness. Forecasting Heaven. — Quebec, 16th January, 1855. 108 H. M. Ephemeral Government, 1858. No. \O0O.— \it Session, Gth Parliament, 21-2 Viciorix, 1858. BILL. An Act to immortalize certain Members of Her Majesty's Most Ephemeral Government. First Reading Monday, 16tli August, 1858. Second and Third Reading instantcr. Mr. V. Grben. Nena Sabib, Printer to the King of Delhi. No. 1000.] BILL. [1858. An Act to immortalize certain Members of Her Majesty's Most Ephemeral Government.* FYTTE FIRST. 1. A pleasant game of Fox and Geese Was plaj'ed by certain famous men, 'Twas not in Egypt, Eome or Greece, We won't say where it was or when. 2. Baited with place and power and cash Sly Eenard set a cunning gin ; The leading Gander's soul was rash, And twelve great geese at once rushed in. 3. He might have caught at least a score, For all were eager to be taken, Only the trap Would hold no more, And so the small ones saved their bacon. • See the Journals of Parliament of this date. //. i¥. Ephemeral Government, 1858. 109 4. One curly gosling seemed to pout. And others' eyes the tears ran o'er in, That bigger geese should crowd them out, And that the trap would take no Mor'in. 5. Those in the trap grew mighty proud, And little dreaming of disasters. Strutted about and gabbled loud, And throught they were the Pox's Masters. G. Not so the Fox — in merry mood He laughed to see the waddlinii* rout ; He broke no bones, he drank no blood. But pulled their prettiest feathers out; 7. lie clipped their wings in Vulpine play. He spoilt their dream so fair and bright. Then turned them out to find their way Back to their pen as best they might. 8. Sweet pen ! where they with brazen throats In oratory used to dabble, And daily gain their ninety groats By legislative noise and gabble 9. Alas ! the way is hard to find, And very rough and rude the track, And many may be left behind And never, never more get back ! FYTTE SECOND. 10. Who played the Fox and who the Goose — In that eventful time ? — Attend the answer of the muse In true and deathless rhyme. 110 H. M. Ephemeral Gnvernment, 1858. 11. The Fox a mystery rejnains, NOMINIS UMBRA STAT, And people puzzle hard their brains In guessing this and that. 12. Some think what seems the Fox's Head Vice-regal honours wears ; — While others hold that in their stead A lawyer's coif appears. 13. Some think him wrong, some think him right, (Those Quidnuncs of the Town) Some call him black — some call him white, But no one thinks him Brown. 14. The name of every goose he caught In print recorded was. In that great work which n^.ay be bought, Of Mister Desbarats. 15. And not among them all was seen A goose of orange hue, But some were rouge— iho' all were green, And now look very blue. 16. And one you'd think could never be Entrapped, — he looks so sage. And so deep read, — no doubt but he Enjoys a green old age. 17. The geese uncaught were of all hues, Including White, they say ; — (Between the reader and the muse) The curly goose was Gre^. H. M. Ephemeral Government, 1858. 11 1 18. But there arc men of other creed "Who hold the Fox a myth, Like Fellowes' voters, — or nfeed By Mr. Speaker Smith. 19. These think the Fox was love of power. And love of profit too, — And Dorion's maxim for the houi", Was — tout est four Lemieux : 20. In short that in ambition wrapped, Nought heeding wisdom's frown, Foley b}^ folly was entrapped. And Brown by Brown done brown. CONCLUSION. 21. Thus was the game of Fox and Geese Played by those famous men : — They were in luck who saw the piece, It can't be played again. 22. Great geese, ere Agamemnon reigned, No doubt the ancients saw ; — No tuneful Poet they obtained, And died by Nature's law.— 23. Our greater geese through ever}' age. Like cocks of Gallia may crow. Their names are writ on Clio's page, NON CARENT VATE SACRO. 112 In Memoriam, IN MEMOEIAM. Old Christ Church. Ottawa, 5th March, 1872. Dear Old Timbs — They are pulling down Old Christ Church. It was not handsome certainly, but it had memorie-; attached to it which the new one cannot have. T, for one, cannot help feeling grieved ; and perhaps some lines in which I have tried to give expression to my grief, may find an echo in the heart of more than one old Bytownian ; if you think so, you may print them and oblige Your's most truly, JANE. Farewell old Church, where on my infant brow With solemn rite the mystic sign was traced, And when my j'outhful faith renewed the vow, On my bowed head confirming hands were placed : Where first I shared the Christian feast divine, His flesh the bread, the atoning blood the wine : Before whose altar once I stood a bride, And where through many a year I knelt in prayer, A thoughtful wife, with children by my side, And on my Saviour cast my every care : Where over one the thrilling words were read, Which when the weary leave this scene of strife, Console the living, sanctify the dead, And tell of resurrection and of life. A fairer fane may rise to take thy place. Whose bioader aisles may own a statelier grace ; Through pictured windows richer light may stream On moulded architrave and sculptured beam ; From loftier tower the Sabbath bell be rung, By fuller choirs the swelling anthem sung :— These will be well— but no new church can be, What THOU hast been— thou dear old Church, to me, Ottawa Times, March 8th., 1872. New Christ Church— '1 'he Attack. Il3 THE ATTACK, A Lay by a Layman. (AFTER TENNYSON) [" The New Chiist Chiii-cli will contain six hundred sittings "]— Report °f the Building CommiUee. Deep in debt, deep in debt, Deep in debt, deeply, — Swiftly to ruin's brink Dinft the six hundred. " Build, build " the Eector said : Faint hearts they all obeyed, Into the clutch of debt Sank the six hundred. II. Now the foundation's laid. Wise men all stand disniaj^ed ; But though the laity knew Some one had blundered ; Theirs not to question why ? Theirs not to reason why? Theirs but to pay and sigh : — Truly in slime of debt Crawled the six hundred. TIT. See all their purses bare, Filled now with nought but air Paying the workmen tliere, 8 114 New Christ Church— The Attack. Paying an army, while All the woi'ld wondered : Plunged into carpets, glass, Grand organ, lamps, and gas ; Native and stranger, Sickened, discordant mass, Worn out and plundered : — Parsons are pleased, — but not, Not the six hundred. IV. Duns rough to right of them, Duns hard to left of them, Duns firm in front of them Threatened and thundered. Callous to writ and bill, Swallowing the bitter pill, Into the Bankrupt Court, Into the legal mill, Must go the six hundred. V. When will the debt be paid ? the rash move they made ; All the world wondered. Pity the error made, Pity the poor, betrayed, Hapless six hundred. E. J. W. f New Christ Church— The Defence. 115 THE DEFENCE. My Dear " Times. "— To-diiy and to-morrow the ladies offer us a Christmas Tree and other pleasant things in the base- ment story of Christ Church, and on l^iday next, there is to be a very amusing entertainment, at Gowan'sHall, — both in aid of the Organ Fund of the Church. Shall they fail ? St. Cecilia forbid ! They must be a great success ; and as poets have a prescriptive right to be prophets, I venture to sgnd you a little poem about them in the prophetic spirit, as if written after the event, but differing from that of another of your poets, who, though a little severe, may have done us, (as I am bound to believe he intended to do ), good service by shewing us what debt might lead to. Ever yours, most truly. One of the Six Hundred. I " Deep in debt, deep in debt, " — " Let not the thing be said, " — " Eouse ye my faithful flock, " Up and repel the charge, "Faithful six hundred;"— Thus our good Eector said, Cheerfullj' all obcj^ed ; Spui'ning the shame of debt, Rose the six hundred. II. All to their Chiistiucis tree Thronged witii cacli K-indlj- glee, 116 New Christ Church — The Defence. Soon it was plain to see No one had blundered ; Theirs was the motive high, Theirs was the brave reply, Theirs was the noble cry, " Freely our help we'll give ; — Worthy six hundred. IIL Then came they one and all. Crowding to Gowan's Hall, Answering their Eector's call, Heaping their offerings while All the world wondered ; Clergy with laymen vied. Opening their purses wide, Swelling the golden tide ; Poor man and wealthy In feeling not sundered, Giving their best to God, All the six hundred. IV. Croakers to right of them. Croakers to left of them. Croakers in front of them, Vainly had thundered ; Strong in their sense of right Strong in their cause's might. Bravely they fought the fight, Freeing their Church from shame, From the reproach of debt. Generous six hundred. New Christ Church — The Defence. 11*; V Glorious the effort made, Heavy the debt they paid, While the world wondered ; Praise we the victory won, Praise the work nobly done By the six hundred. Ottawa, December 16, 1873. 118 Thule or ThuU. THULE OE THULE The following letters, — inserted by permission, — throw some light on the composition of the Poem in question, and ^hey show too the interest which His Excellency took in the modest production of the Company's Muse, and that he was gra- ciously pleased to " Read it by the light of kindness " " Through good nature's rosiest glusses, " — an example which I trust the readers of my " Waifs " will loyally imitate. Ottawa, 8 June, 1876. My Lord, If Your Excellency were only Governor General of Canada, I should perhaps doubt whether so dignified a personage as a Q. C. of rather ancient standing, might with propriety edit, or, having edited, otfer for Your Excellency's acceptance the accom- panying trifle,— the first production of " The Thule or Thule Passage at Arms Company (Limited) " — of which I have the honor to be the Editor. But as the author of " Letters from High Latitudes'' and more especially of the famous Latin after dinner speech in Iceland, I cannot but hope that Your Excel- lency will take some interest in our attempt to throw light upon what our Benedictine Friar calls " the weird mysterious Island's name. " And Your Excellency, though not a member of the Company, is in some sort responsible for its formation, — for without The Ball, there would have been no Britannia among us, and without Britannia no " Passage at Arms, " which was a real bond fide encounter of the wits of some of Your Excel- lency's faithful Canadian Lieges, the greater parts of them being Thule or Thule. 119 of the Civil Service. In proof that one of us (Our Friar) is capable of higher things, I inclose a paper * which I had the honor of editing for him some time ago. I have the honor to be. with profound respect, Your Excellency's most obedient servant, G. W. WiCKSTEED Government House, Ottawa, June 10th., 18*76. My dear Wicksteed, I am really most obliged to you for having sent me such a charming Jew d'esprit. I only wish Lady Duffei-in and I could have been by at the Passage of Arms thus happily rendered immortal. It would, however, have been as an humble spectator, as I should have hardly felt competent to engage in so learned a controversy. Your sincerely, DUFFERIN. • Our Lord at Bethany, by E. T. Fletcher 120 Thule or ThulL THULE OR THULE (A PASSAGE AT ARMS IN RHYME. Respectfully dedicated to Britannia. May farthest Thule obey thee. Tibi serviat ultima Thuld. THE ARGUMENT. G. W. W. mentions in the course of conversation " Prin. cess of Thule. " A Lidj whose excellent impersonation of the character at the Great Fancy Ball, entitles her to be designa- ted as Britannia, thinks it should be " Thule, a place in Scot- land. " G. W. W. very respectfully begs leave to differ, W* H. G. takes up his lance for Britannia and becomes her Knight, G. W. W, fights in his ovvn defence and right. Each Knight mounts his Pegasus and couches his lance. First Trumpet sounds a Point of War If any man respects his school, he Certainl}^ will call it Thule ; — But if he owns Britannia's rule. Why then perhaps he'll call it Thule. Second Trumpet answsrs. "When Irish Celts follow the funeral car, Their grief finds exj^i-ession in " shule, shule, agrah I " " Oh Patsy ohone ! and why did you die ? " " Shule, shule, agrah, " is their wailing cry. Whiskey and sorrow may make them unruly, But never, oh never, will make them say " Shule ! " W\ Thule or Thule. 121 Now Thule rail}', I think have a Celtic affinity, And escape from the rules of your worship's latinity ; So if I should bow to Britannia's decision, I may very well be on the side of precision ; If her trident won't serve her to govern a word, Why as to the waves, — it would be quite absurd. (W. H. G.) First Trumpet sounds again. Though Britannia's command of the waves may be great, It it very well known that slie don't rule them straight; And her feminine subjects too often complain, That she put them to somewhat unwarranted pain ; So now, — with a semi-barbarian Celt Who won't let their names be pronounced as they're spelt, She conspires many amiable ladies to tease, And by cruel cunff«7ment deprive them of Ees. And Thisbe and Hebe and Phcebe protest That the thought of her tyranny robs them of rest; And Niobe vows, with abundance of tears. That Lethe can't make her forget it for years : They deny that you give any reason for that Which you say, — tho' they own your authority's — Pat. Second Trumpet replie*. Second Knight loquitur — pro Britannia. It tries my patience sorely, to find that all this fuss is xMade on behalf of a pack of Pagan huzzies. Who, you tell me are given up to tears and affliction, Because, forsooth, to suit them I won't mend my diction ; — Your Ilebes and Thisbes seem their Ees to fondly prize ! They spelt them with an Eta (II), or the ancients have told lies, 122 Thule or Thule. Then my waves are not straight ! — If I ruled not as I do, Pi-ay, my brave Britons, — what would become of you ? Your seas tor protection would not be worth their salt, If my ways of ruling did not cause your foes to halt. But now I'll say no more than just to let you know, That when you speak of Thule I shall still cry. No ! No ! .. Things must have come to a pretty pass, trulj-, Before I consent to call Christmas " Yuley " l...(W. H. G.) First Trumpet sounds again a classic flourish. First Knight loquitur. I You've your dictionary makers, giving words the sounds most fit, Prove me wrong by any one of them and them I'll own I'm hit : Bring our your big " Imperial " and I'll abide by that : But I'll be , well, say " tridented " before I bow to Pat' Second Trumpet sounds again, a Celtic flourish. Second Kniijht loquitur. When the Greeks to that Isle in the Hebrides came. Of course they inquired of a native its name ; And the native of native intelligence full As certainly answered by telling them " Thul ; " But as this was a name that no Grecian would speak, They added an Eta, and so made it Greek. And thus I have proved in my logical verse. That " Thul " is the right name in orthodox Erse, Tho' the Greeks and the Eomans dealt with it unduly, And by adding a letter transformed it to Thule ; And Britannia's not wrong when she followeth Pat, in gis pronunciation tho' not Greek or Latiq, I I Thule or Thule. 123 First Knighl challerxjes in heroic verse — I burn to meet thee on the Imperial field, And throw my gauntlet down, and touch thy shield. They run a course without serious damage to either ; and a Queen of Beauty it appointed to crown the victor : The Lists remaining open — A Pundit appears on the field. An aged Pundit passing by And seeing Knights thus valiantly Engaged in Arms, did thus discourse : Such a Pundit as I am can see very clear That to rightly pronounce the queer word we have here. To the Court ot Analogy appeal must be made, And judgment when given be strictly obeyed. This word I hear vaunted, by one gallant Knight, Of Hellenic descent is, — wherein he is right : But his classic complaisance I e'en must disturb, By stating I know of savory Herb That grows in his garden, wherein he may smell il, And then, if he pleases, may afterwards spell it. This herb it is Thyme, of good Grecian descent, Just as good as is that now in hot argument ; — But by lisping its A, who is there would dare To smirch the good name of this verhum so fair ? And so it is seen, by analogy's law. That the h in the word for which these Knights draw, Full silent should be never brea hing a breath, But passing a life of dumbness till death. Then, next, I could wish that these Knights simply knew, That clearly the " double " sound is in U, — As in " rule " it is spoken ; — a point though so plain. That it scares needs more light from my light-giving strain* 124 Thuh or ThuU. Now touching the Tail of this troublesome word ; — " It wagless must be, like the tail of a bird," Cries one gallant Knight, Britannia's defender ; Whereon I could wish that the Gods would but send her A Knight better versed in true verbal affinity, And with more of respect for our Greek and Latinity. Wagless ! or Voiceless ! Then why should not Acme Be " Ackem " pronounced ? A vile thought to rack my Sensitive nerves and compel my apology To every student of English Philology. Having thus with much wisdom disclosed on what data I determine these questions of verba vexata, 'T is easy 1o see to pronounce their word truly, These preux chevaliers should agree upon Tooley. (E. F. K.) 1 I First Knight loquitur. His Trumpeter sounds afiourish. Mr. Pundit, my ladies you mightily please, By rightly and kindly protecting their E es ; But the rest of your argument's feeble and vile, For if Thumos makes Thyme, must not Thule make Tile ? Second Knight loquitur. nis Trumpeter sounds another flourish. And if Thule becomes Tooley, then Thyme should be Thym-ey,^ Qr your re^vson'g inferior far to your E.hym-ey, ThuU or Thule. 125 Britannia Loquitur. Superbe. Sounds Lord Nelson's Trumpet and crushes the Pundit. My Nelson was christened at victory's font, B}' a title which some people call Duke of Bront : — Would you^ my good Pundit, have ventured, I wonder, To call my great Hero, My Lord Dook of Tunder ! An Oaten Pipe is heard playing a classic strain. The Schoolmaster being abroad in the neighbourhood an I hearing a row among the boys, thus addres es them : Young folks let me teach you analogy fails In matters of language and custom prevails : So tho' Thule be Thule, yet Thyme may be Thyme ; And tho' Bronte be Bronte, yet Ehyrae may be Rhyme. Poor Pundit, you're hit on all sides, I may say ; But comfort your grief with this saying of Gay, — " Tho men who in other men's frays interpose, " Will oft have to wipe a sanguineous nose. " Sir Caledon Gilder; a splendid Knight in Gold Armour, takes part in the /ray, and runs a-tilt wildly, trumpeting thus, — If dealing in concrete objective reality, I fear that Britannia's bump of locality For once is creative and includes 'neath her rule, A region fictitious, the " Kingdom of Thule. " True " Mainland " of Scotland to the title laid claim. But 'twas only in fancy and never by name ; And Borva, where Black has enthroned his King, Is of Hebride, east-ward of Scotland's west wing. 126 Thule w ThulL We'll deem her in error, and not like her " Leader " In greed territorial, that titular feeder, Who thrusts before Europe his " Empress Bill Titles " Conservative gnawing conservative vitals. But the ancients made Thule the end of creation, At a time when Scotch thrift had caused little sensation, And Britannia, mayhap, to their mercantile keenness, Would accord them the Ultima Thule of meanness. But I, as I turn o'er each page of his fiction, Alight on such rare vivid scenic description. That I think, of this art, we might not unduly Pronounce Mr. Black the true King of Thule. (C. G.) Chorus of all the contending parties We bid you fair welcome, most valorous Knight, Who have ventured the breaking a lance in our fight ; Your intentions were good and so far you deserve Our praise, which we give with this only reserve, That as for your verses, we've analizcd ihem, And, — simply, Sir Gilder, they're " nihil ad rem, " /n Infantry Soldier appears on the scene. Pedes, attracted by the warlike sounds, comes boldly forioard and thus announces himself a combatant: Oh ! worthy Knights who high on horses ride, I also in this fray would take a side ; I am no Knight, as my name doth imply, On my own understanding I rely. The name of Thule given in times remote, Doth signify the house of Johnny Groat, A worthy Scot from whom I claim descent; Thde or Thule. 127 (The Scots full valiant arc in argument) ; — Now though in Scotland 'tis the constant rule Not to pronounce the final e in schule, Or yide, ov fule, or any such like word, In Thulo the last e is always heard. 'Tis known by those who prize old classic lore, This name is used by one who wrote of yore. And if you will but read his work sublime, With Thule only can you make a rhyme. Therefore 'tis Thule that alone is rii^ht. Though Thule may be defended by a Knight : And such I will maintain 'gainst any score, Come they before me on two legs or four. (J. F. W.) A Benedictine Friar Startled /rom hys bookes, iooketh oid/rom a windowt harde by, and thus diicourseth, Dilecti fratres, benedicite, — What means this preparation for a fray ? These Knights in armour dight, with eyes aflame, Girt for the onset ? — And this armed dame Wielding the glorious trident which of yore Old Neptune gave to guard our native shore : — A Pundit, too, — a wise and genial talker, — A Pedes, — or in other words a Walker; — And, last a Pedagogue ; What is the row ? Tell me, good people, what's the matter now ? Thule or Thule. You tell me this alone is f'ons et origo disputationis ; — The cause of strife and subject of dispute Lie in this word, — and whether we should view 't As made up or one syllable of two ? 128 Thule or Thule. Hence all this clang of arms, and wild halloo, Hence the air darkens, thunders roll, the ground Quakes with a dull premonitory sound, And fierce Bellona, from her dreadful car, 'Cries havoc and lets slip the dogs of war ! Thule or Thule. When Pythias of Marseilles (A traveller fond of telling wondrous tales) Wrote of the far-famed Island in the north. The' extremest limit of the peopled earth, — He called it Thule ; so, in later days. Wrote the Cyrenian Eratosthenes ; So also Ptolemy th' Egyptian, Procopius, another learned man, And other Hellenists of ages gone, All named in Facciolati's Lexicon. Then for the Latins, — come now, tell me truly. How can you make it otherwise than Thulo, When in old Maro's Georgicon divine We find it as a spondee close the line ? And so with every other Eoman poet Adduced by Fatchy, — his quotations shew it. On classic grounds then surely all agree The true pronunciation is Thule, Or better, if Erasmus we obey Eather then Reuchlin, then we have Thuley. But here Britannia's Knight remarks again. "The word is Celtic, and should so remain." But how may this be proven ? — Whence inferred ? What Celtic author uses such a word ? Is there a vocable in prose or verse Like Thule, in Breton, Gaelic, or in Erse ? |[ I know of none. I've wandered to and fro, I Thule or Thule. 129 With Celts held frequent commune, and must go Still unconvinced. Let him the fact declare, If such there be : — I tind none anywhere. How came the word in use ? Wiiere all is dark, Permit me here to hazard the remark, That in the language of the ancient Finns, Whose history terminates where ours begins, Tuli means " Fire. " In old primeval days. Sailing far north, perhaps the sudden blaze Of Ilccla flashed upon their wondering sight And tinged the sky with red volcanic light Aud thus the weird mysterious island's name Haply from these rude navigators came. And so,— a mere conjecture, — pardon me, — I finish with a Finnish theory. Brothers farewell. I hear the vesper boll That summons me to — Whore I need not tell. God ye good den. Sit Dominus tutamon. Laus Deo semper in excelsis. Amen. (E. T. F.) The Queen of Beauty speaks and makes her award. Now stop the strife ; — lot no more bones be broken. The contest's ended when the Church hath spoken ; Her word is law ; — for truth hath ever graced it. — And victory's crown must rest where She iiath placed it. Yet a fair wreath shall grace the Celtic Knight, Who against fearful odds maintaineJ the fight. And proved at least, Bi'itannia viuy bo right. Cease then to deal each other stalwart blows; — Wipe, learned Pundit, thy sanguineous nose : Sir Gilder, if in verse you tilt again , 10 130 Thuh or Thule. Do strive to put more purpose in your strain And, Pedes, learn that Virgil's work sublime; Which you appeal to, — was not writ in Bhynie. And now let every angry feeling cease, Join hand in hand and kindly part in peace. I grieve the learned Friar could not wait, Lest he for Vespers should perhaps be late ; — But I perceive without him we are eight ; And were he here, that holy man would tell us, " Nunc pede libero est pulsanda tellus." Sound trumpets once again, — this time " the Lancers ; " Britannia and myself will both be dancers. And when that's done, I hold t'would not be bad, We sought our homesteads in a Galopade 1 But first, — march past my throne, and, as you pass, Salute me in the words of Hudibras I They 77iarch past, saluting the Queen with " Madam, we do, as is our duty, " Honour the shadow of your shoe-tie," And bow before the Queen of Beauty, They dance the Lancers. — For want of Ladies the Pundit and School- master pair together, — and Pedes walks the figures with Sir Caledon. As they finally go off in the Gallop, the Friar looks at them from the window of his ceU, and says:^' Beati pacificatores. Amen." I Note. — The several portions of this little Epic, to which initials are appended, were really written by gentlemen whose initials they bear, at Ottawa, Quebec, or Montreal, without any understanding, collusion, or com- munication, except only of the portions preceeding theirs respectively. In Memoriam Temporurn. 131 IN MEMOEIAM TEMPO RUM. Farewell dear Times, Bray's Vicar of the press, But not, alas ! with his renowned success. He died a Vicar, thou by sad mishap, Did'st die for lack of patronage and pap ! — Conservative, then (xrit, and then again Conservative, became thy pliant pen. — But as thou died'st repentant of thy schism, A very Magdalen of journalism. We trust thou'st left non-paying work below. For that good place where virtuous journals go. I'd write thy Requiescat, — but I fear That super-protestant religious sneer Would call it " praying for the dead " — and hope I had not quite gone over to the Pope ; And mix me up in that unseemly brawl, Where Christian priests, nnmindful of St. Paul And of the poet's bitter couplet, ^ call Each other ugly names, and each in turn Inclines to think his brother priest must burn Hereafter, — not remembering that of three Great virtues, far the first is charity. How shall I miss thee at my morning meal, — How at my noon-day lunch thine absence feel ; And how, when weary to my couch I creep, Without thy leaded leader shall I sleep ? "Christians have burnt each other quite persuaded " That all the Apostles would have done as they did."— Byron. 132 Special Notices of Motions. Resurgas; — may'st thou ripe again and find A larger patronage, more rich, more kind, Perchance another name ; — as Bytown died * And rose as Ottawa, the crown and pride Of the Dominion, so thy poet's rhymes Vaticinate that thou as the " New Times, " Shalt like a Phoenix rise, and hj^ that name Mount the very peak of wealth and fame ! W. 4SiV George Cartier and the Civil Code ding the Province into nineteen now judicial districts being of the most for- midable nature. Wiien in 18 57 he succeeded Dr. Tache as leader of the Conservatives of Lower Canada, Cartier breaking through the narrow limits of party, tooii two Liberals, M. Sicotte ana M. Belleau, into the Cabinet, and made ouvertures to M. Dorion which the Liberal Chief was not able to accept On the Lysons Militia Bill his immediate followers, yielding to vague fears among their constituents of the conscription, not less than the great increase of expense, deserted in numbers, leaving him with only a small minority at his back. A good Catholic, he had yet the courage to defend the rights of the State against the encroachments of Bishop Bourget, at a time when the Bishop's influence was omnipotent ; an act of duty which cost him his seat for Montreal. He saw the beginning and the end of the Legislative Union which he cordially accepted and assisted in working, and which when its had served its purpose he was among the first to assist in superseding by the Confederation. Whatever success he attained was due in a large measure to hard labour and perseverance; for the first fifteen years of his public life he was, when not disturbed, as he was often, chained to his desk, fifteen hours a day ; and for thirty years fancied that to get though his task he must labour seven days a week. The other article appeared as a letter in an Ottawa paper some weeks since : — Two Ministers, who had been his colleagues and knew him well, spoke at the unveiling of the statue of the late Sir George Cartier, and eloquently and lovingly eulogized his qualities as a stateman and the great services he ren- dered to our country ; and he deserved their praise, for no man ever worked more earnestly and impartially for the welfare of Canada and of Canadians of every race and creed. Here in Ottawa he will be long remembered for his kindly geniality ; and very many of our citizens and visitors will recol- lect the pleasent evenings at his house on Metcalfe street, when arran- ging his guests in make-believe canoes, with make-believe paddles in their hands, he would sing and make them join in his favourite boat song, with the re/7-am of which Sir John, in concluding his speech, so happily apostrophised his old friend and colleague. I feel sure that they, and all who knew Sir George, will join Sir John in saying from thir hearts as I do — " II a longtemps que je t'aime, Jamais je ne t'oublierai." \ Sir George CaTtier and the Civil Code.' 145 Not through the statue which his country's love Hath to his honour raided, but through the deeds And qualities which won that love, shall he, The patriot whom we mourn, forever live In true Canadian hearts of every race. And chiefly through his strong and steadfast will That difference of race, or creed or tongue, Should not divide Canadians, but that all Should be one people striving for one end. The common good of all. His country stretched From Louisbourg to far Vancouver's Isle, And claimed and had his patridt love and care. And thus he we won a high and lK)noiired |)lace Among the worthiest of his nimc and race. G. W. W II 140 [^'^ Statue de Cartier. LA STATUE DE CAETIEE Voyez, dans ce bronze fidele, Fait ponr triompbcr des autans, Celui qui servait de modele Aux patriotes de son temps ! II reparait, superbe dans sa force, Dressant un front qui n'a jamais plie. Coeur genereux. " chene a la rude ecorce. ' Le Canadien ne I'a pas oublie, Ne I'a pas oublie ! Venu de I'epoque lointaine Ou I'intrigue opprimait le droit, Get heritier de Lafontaine Nous affranchit d'un joug etroit. Grand ouvrier dans la lacbe commune, Avec ardeur il a sacrifie fg Sante, repos, et bonheur at fortune. Le Canadien ne i'a pas oublie, Ne I'a pas oublid ! Le souci de la politique N'altera jamais sa gaite, Souvent la verve poetique Chez lui brillait en liberte. Et, bout en train, type de Jean-Baptiste, Comme il chantait I'amour et I'amitie ! L'humblo couplet nous revele un artiste. Le Canadien ne I'a oublid, Ne I'a pas oublie ! t Cartier's Statue. 147 CAETIEE'S STATUE. Here in enduring bronze Proof against time and storm, Stands ho, " the mark and glass" Of patriots of his time ! A head to frame his country's laws, A brow that never blanched with fear, A generous man, — a " rough barked oak. " Whom Canada has not forgot ! Will not forget ! Born in that long past time When intrigue baffled right; True heir of Lafontaine He broke our galling yoke. Brave toiler for tho common good, Without regret he sacrificed Health, pleasure, fortune, rest. Him Canada has not forgot, Will not forget ! The wearing cares of state Checked not his gaiety; His pleasant strains of verse Flowed often bright and free. And once set off, true type of Jean-Baptiste, How well he sang of love and friendship's charm ; His modest rhymes the artist's skill reveal, Whom Canada has not forgot, Will not forget ! 148 I'd Statue de Cartkr. Pres dcs souvenirs que j'honore, Son image est dans ma maison ; II convient d'applaudir encore Son esprit ferme et]sa raison. A la jeunesse il enseigne Thistoire, Car son destin fut le plus er\y\6. Nous I'avons mis au temple de memoire. Le Canadien nc la pas oubl'e, Ne I'a pas oublie, Benjamin Sulte. Ottawa, Janvier 1885. 1?< Cartier's Statue. 140 ' Mid treasures highest prized, His portrait decks my home ; Good is it that wo love to praise His steadfast will, by reason ruled. His stor}' teaches virtue to our youth. For his the path that all should strive to tread : In memory's temple still he lives enshrined. Him Canada has not forixot. Will not forget! G. W. W. 150 Fors THonneur. FOES L'lIONNEUE. C'est par un soil humide et triste de I'automne. Dans les plis du brouillard, la plainle monotone Du St.-Laurent se mele aux murmures confus Des chenes et des pins dont les domes touffus Couronnent les hauteurs de I'ile Sainte-He,lene. Au loin tout est lugubre; on sent commo une haleine De mort Hotter paitout dans I'air froid de la nuit. Au zenith nuageux pas un astre ne luit. Tout devrait reposer ; pourtant, sur I'ile sombre, A certaines lueurs qui se meuvent dans I'ombre, On croirait entrevoir, vaguement dessines, — Groupes mysterieux partout dissemines, Et se serrant la main avec des airs funebres, — Comme des spectres noirs roder dans les tenebres. Tout a coup, sur le fond estompe des massifs, Et teignant d'or le fut des vieux ormes pensifs, Dans les pdtillements attises par la brise, Et les craquements sourds du bois sec qui se brise, Eclatent les rougeurs d'un imi; ense brasier Prenant pour piedestal I'affut d'un obusier; Un homme, au meme instant, domine la clairiere; A son aspect, un bruit de fanfare guerriere Eetentit ; du tambour les lointains roulements Se confondent avec les brefs commandements Qui prompts et saccades, se croisent dans I'espace. Place ! c'est la rumeur d'un bataillon qui passe. Un autre bataillon le suit, et, tour a tour. On voit les regiments former leurs i-angs autour Du rougeoyant brasier dont les lueurs troublantes Eclairent vaguement ces masses ambulantes, A chaque ba'ionnette allumant un eclair, All lost but Honour. 151 ALL LOST BUT IIONOUE. Wet, dark and sad comes on the autumn night ; Through the thick mist the river's murmuring sound Blends with the rustling of the oaks and pines Crowning St. Helen's Isle; and far and near The landscape saddens, and the heavy air In the chill night feels as if charged with death. No star the zenith brightens, and o'er all Quiet should reign : but on the sombre Isle Faint, wavering lights that flicker in the dark, Make dimly visible mysterious groups Scattered around with claspol hands as if Black spectres moved about in darkness there. Sudden against the back ground of thick woods, And lipping as with gold the pendent elms, Amid the rustling sound of rising wind And crackling as of dry wood breaking up, Burst forth bright flames as from a furnace based Upon the broad blaek carriage of a gun : A man stands forth and dominates the scene. On whose appearing warlike sounds are heard; The distant roll of drums blends with the bi'icf Prompt, sharp command ; — Make room I — They come, Battalions followed by battalions pass; Each following each the regiments surround The glowing furnace whose bright flames illume The moving mass, until each bayonet seems To bear the lightning's flash upon its point. 152 Fors IHonneur. Alors, couvrant le bruit, un timbre mS,le et clair, Oil vibro je ne sais quel tremblement farouche, Eesonne, et repetes tout bas de bouche en bouche, Parmi les cliquetis, les clameurs et le vent, Laisse tomber ces mots : — — Les drapeaux en avant ! Arretons-nous devant devant cette page d'histoire. Nos conqu^rants etaient maitres du territoire. Cerne dans Montreal, le marquis de Vaudreuil, Apros plus de sept ans de luttes et de deuil, Apres plus de sept ans de gloire et de souffrauce, Ne vo3'ant arriver aucun secours de France, Le desespoir au coeur, avait capitule. L'orgucilleux ennemi meme avait stipule, — La rougour k ma joue, helas ! en monte encore, — Que le lendemain meme, au lever de I'aurore, Nos defenseurs, parques comme de vils troupeaux, Au gendral anglais remettraient leurs drapeaux, Leurs drapeaux !... Ces drapeaux dont le pli fier et libre Durant un siecle avait soutenu I'dquilibre Contre le monde entier, sur tout un continent! Ces drapeaux dont le vol encore tout frissonnant Du choc prodigieux des grands tournois epiques, Cent ans avait jete, des poles aux tropiques, Son ombre glorieuse au front des bataillons ! Ces drapeaux dont chacun des sublimes haillons, Noir de poudre, rougi de sang, couvort de gloire, Cachait dans ses lambeaux qaelquo nom de victoire ! Ces etandards poudreux qui naguore, la-bas, Sous leg murs de Quebec, avaient de cent combats Couronne le dernier d'un triomphe supi'eme I f Ces insignes sacres, il fallait, le soir meme, I All lost but Honour. 153 Then rises o'er the tumult clear and stern A voice that all obe}', and the command From mouth to mouth repeated, sounds above The clamour of the crowd and roar of wind : — " The colours to the Front ! "— Here let us pause And briefly scan a page of history. Our conquerors were masters of the ground ; — Close pent in Montreal, the bravo Vaudrcuil, After seven years of glory and of suffering, Seeing no hope of succour sent by France. Heart-broken by despair, capitulated; And the proud enemy had stipulated, (Shame makes my cheek burn while I mention it) That on the following morn, at break of day, Our brave defenders, penned like timid sheep, Should into English hands deliver up Their colours — colours whose folds proud and free, Had for a century held their own against A world in arms, throughout a continent ! Whose onward sweep, still bearing the impress Of the great epic contests of the past, During a hundred j'ears, from pole to line, Bore them in front of conquering battalions ; And upon every glorious rag of which, Blackened by powder, red with blood, was stamped The proud memorial of some victory! Those colours, batlle-stained, which at Quebec Had left the latest of a hundred fights Triumphantly, — to them there must be sai4 I 154 Fors Jy Honneur. Leur faire pour tonjours d'humiliants adieux ! Indigne, revolte par ce pacte odieux, Levis, ce dernier preux de la grande e|X)pee, Le regard menaQant, la main sur son dpee, S'etait leve soudain, et sans long argument, Contre I'insulte avait proteste fierement. "Vingt milie Anglais sont la qui campent dans la plaine, Lui n'a plus qu'un debris d'armee a Sainte Heleno : N'importe ! les soldats fran^ais ont su jadis Plus d'une fois combattre et vaincre un contre dix ! La France, indifferente, au sort nous abandonne : N'importe encore ! on meurt quand le devoir I'ordonne ! II veut, sans compromis, resister jusqu'au bout. II se retirera dans Tile, et la, debout A son poste, en heros luttera sans relache. — Dans mes rangs, disait-il, il n'est pas un seul lache ! Ne pretez pas la main a ce honteux marche ; Je puis, huit jours au n;oins, dans mon camp retranche, Avec mes bataillons tenir tete a Forage; Et si la France cncor, trompant notre courage, Refuse d'ici la le secours implore, Dans un combat fatal, sanglant, ddsespere, Tragique denoument d'une antique querello, Nous saurons lui montrer comment on meurt pour elle ! Vaudreuil signa pourtant. Refuser d'obeir, Cetait plus que de braver la mort, c'etait trahir. — Trahir ! avait pense le guerrier sans reproche... Et c'est lui, qui dans I'ombre, avant que I'aube approche, A ses soldats emus, dans la nuit se mouvani, Avait jete ce cri ; — Los drapeaux en avant ! Allait-il les livrer ? AUait-il, a la face i All lost but Iloiwvr. 155 That night, with shame and grief a last adieu ! Indignant at the odious compromise, Levis, the truest knight of that dark time, Fire in his eyes, his hand upon his sword, Rose sudden, and without long argument Against the insult proudly made protest. Upon the plain were twenty thousand foes Encamped ; — the ruins of an army all lie had upon St. Helen's Isle; — no matter, — Soldiers of France had often fought before With ten to one against them, — and had won. If France uncaring leaves us to our fate, No matter still, — We die when duty calls. His voice was for resistance to the death : Withdrawing to the Island, there would he Stand firm and fight, a hero to the last. *' Within^my ranks no coward can be found I " Yield not one jot to this contract of shame. *' I can, eight days at least, in camp entrenched " With my bi'ave comrades stand against the storm ; " And then, if France deceiving our fond hope, " Still fails to send the succour we implore, " In one great battle, bloody, desperate, " The tragic closing of an ancient feud, " We'll show her we know how to die for her." Yet Vaudreuil signed. Eefusal to obey Were worse than death — were treason to his chief; So thought our warrier irreproachable, — And in the dark hours that precede the dawn, He to his soldiers stirring in the night Gave that command, — " The colours to the front ! " To give them up ? Would he before the eyes 156 Fors L'Honneur. De ses vieux compagnons — honte quo rien n'eiface — SoLiiller son ecusson d'un opprobro elcrnel ? On attendait navre le moment solennel. Levis s'avanco alors. Dans son oeil energique, Ou le fea du brasier met un reflet tragique, Malgre son calme, on sent trembler un plour brulant. Vers les drapeaux en deuil I'homme marche a pas lent, Et, pendant que la main de I'histoiro burine, Lui, les deux bras crois^s sur sa vaste poitrine, Devant ces tiers lambeaux ou tant de gloire a lui, Longtemps et fixement regarde devant lui. Dans le fond de son coeur il evoquait sans doute, Tous les morts g^nereux oublies sur la route, Oia, le pli tout baigne de reflets eclatants, Ces guidons glorieux marehaient depuis cent ans. Enfin, comme s'il eut entendu leur reponse, Pendant que son genou dans le gazon s'enfonce, Eefoulant ses sanglots, devorant son affront, Sur les fleurs de lys d'or il incline son front, Et dans I'emotion d'une etreinte derniere, De longs baisers d'adicu couvre chaque banniore... — Et maintenant, dit-il, mes enfants, brulez-les, Avant qu'une autre main ne les livre aux Anglais ! Alors, spectacle etrange et sublime, la foule, Ondulant tout a coup comme une vaste houle, S'agenouille en silence; et solennellement, Dans le bucher saci-e, qui sur le firmament, Avec des sifflements rauques comme des rales, Detache en tourbillons ses sanglantes spirales, Parmi les flamboiements d'etincelles, parmi Un flot de cendre en feu par la braise vomi, Sous les yeux du heros grave comme un apotre, I' I All lost but Honour. 157 Of his old comrades, work such deed of shame ? Soil his escutcheon with so foul a blot? Heartbroken they await the dreaded word. Levis comes forward ; in his kindling eye Eeflecting the fierce blaze, his soldiers see, Despite his calm, a scalding tear; — towards The colours draped in black, with a slow step He marches, and while History's muse records His act, he with his arms crossed on his breast, Fronting the colours with such glory crown'd, Stands looking on them long and fixedly. His thought, no doubt, invokes th'heroic dead Left on the fields, where, throwing back the light From otf their ample folds, those glorious guides Were borne before them for a hundred years. And then, as if their answer he had heard, — Kneeling upon the turf, stifling his sobs, And striving to control his mighty grief, He bows upon the golden fleurs de lys, And in the agony of a last embrace Covers each flag with kisses of farewell. " Now burn them, boys, before another hand Can give them up unto our English foes. " Then, sight sublime and strange, like a vast wave Sinking in silence, knelt that warrior band, And solemnly into the sacred fire, Which, amid sounds as of death rattle, shot Spirals of blood-red flame in eddying whirls Into the firmament, — amid the rush Of glowing ashes, one by one were thrown. Under the hero's eye, grave as a saint's, 158 Fors L'Honneur. Chaque drapeau frangais tomba I'un apres I'autre! Qnelques crepitements de plus, et ce fut tout. Alors, de Montreal, de Longueuil, de partout, Les postes ennemis crurent, dans la rafale, Entendre uno clameur immense et triomphale : C'^taient les tiers vaincns qui, tout espoir detruit, Criaient: Vive la France ! aux echos de la nuit. O Levis I 6 soldats de cette sombre guerre ! Si vous avez pu voir les hontes de naguere, Que n'etes vous soudain sortis de vos torn beaux, Et, vengeurs, secouant les augustes lambeaux De vos drapeaux en feu, dans votre sainte haine, Venus en cravacher la face de Bazaine ! Louis Frechette. Montreal, avril 1884. La Patrie, 24juin 1884. All lost but Honour, 159 The colours he had loved so long and well ! Some few slight cracklings more, and all was done I From Montreal, Longueuil, and every point The hostile posts believed that in the storm The}' heard loud sounds of Triumph ; 'twas the shout Of the proud vanquished, who in their despair Cried to night's answering echoes, '' Vive la France ! " O Levis ! O brave men of that sad war ! If 3'ou beheld the shame of later days, Why did you not, arising from your tombs And wielding vengeful ly the sacred shreds Of burning flags, in consecrated hate. Smite the dishonoured face of false Bazaine ! G. W. WiCKSTEED. Ottawa, June, 1884. Montreal Gazette, 19 July, 1884. I 1 160 The Queen's Jubilee 1887. VICTORIA, R. 1837. Jubilate. 1887. God save the Queen ! — From millions of true hearts And loyal lips rings out the patriot hymn, Throughout the widest Empire earth has known : — For she, descendant ot a Roj^al line, Holding her crown by strictest rule of law. Hath yet a better title, — royal worth, And that divinest right — her people's love. — And God hath heard the prayer : — no fifty years In England's history match this glorious reign : Her laws, her language, her true liberty, Spurning the tyranny of king or mob. Helping the right and battling with the wrong, Her hardy sons have planted in far lands Savage and wild and waste before, and there Have founded colonies which shall become The seats of mighty Empire yet to be ; — In the unbounded West of Canada, Where the red Indian roamed the prairie wide, Or dense and pathless woods, and tribe with tribe Waged savage, uni-elenting murderous war ; — Or in Australia's semi-continent ; Or in dark Africa by Congo's stream Or new found sources of the ancient Nile ; — Or whereso'er adventurous daring led. Or tempting prospect of extended trade. Or Christian love could hope to plant the cross. The " gorgeous East " has bowed to British rule, And her barbaric kings and potentates Have hailed Victoria's benignant sway I The Queen's Jubilee 188Y. 161 And crowned her India's Empress — British men "With gentle art have taught the dusky race By bright example how our juster laws And kindlier customs, raise the human soul To loftier virtue and a nobler life. Science and art and careful statesmanship Have joined to glorify Victoria's reign, And spread her Empire. Britain's pioneer In his lone hut amid the wildest scenes Of Asia or Afric, feels his lot Softened and smoothed by rapid intercourse With loved and loving friends in distant home, By letter or by message lightning borne, Putting " a girdle round about the world, " Swifter than Ariel's flight could compass it ; — Or picture traced without a painter's hand And true as painter's skill hath ever made : And yeth within the exile's slender means, And travelling safely in a letter's folds ; Drawn by God's purest agent holy light, Which to the eye of science hath unveiled The mystery of the universe, — one law Pervading all creation, yet combined With infinite diversity of form, Beauty and life and happiness, and all The infinite varietj" of good. — These are the triumphs of her reign, to these She gave all kind encouragement and aid. Assisting and assisted by the man " Bearing the white flower of a blameless life " She chose as consort of her life and throne. The glory of a virtuous life, is hers, — Her duty dune as daughter, wife and mother, — 12 162 The Queen's Jubilee 1887. Her court, the home of purity and honour, Her faithful truth to him she loved and lost, Her life devotion to her people's good, And true observance of her sacred vow To rule in strict conformity to law. — Defender of the faith, she held it right To act as christian faith enjoined, — and kept Her coronation oath inviolate. And therefore, — Canada, which from her hand Received self government in freeest form. And Ottawa to which she gave the palm. As the Queen city of this fair Dominion ; — With Loyal hearts of every race or creed, Within her Empire's wide circumference, Join in the patriot prayer, — God save the Queen. G, W. WiCKSTEED. Ottawa, 21 June, 1887. A National Anthem. 163 A NATIONAL ANTHEM. Editor of The Citizen, Sir — When I was a young man (in 1878) I ventured to write a National Anthem for Canada. Though there were plenty of a very pretty songs about " Canada First " and woods and lakes and maple leaves and beavers, I thought they wanted concentration, and were not singahle to any tune the people knew. Lord DuflPerin was pleased to call my anthem " excel- lent " : Sir John said he wished it could be sung in every Cana- dian home ; and Lord Lome and Sir George thoroughly shared my wish for cordial amity among Canadians of every race and creed. I should be glad to see it, with its little addendum, in The Citizen when our city keeps its double holiday in honour of the Queen's Jubilee and the Birthday of our Dominion. If I were an M. P. and au orator, I would conjure Canadians of all our nationalities. — By Erin's Harp and Shamrock green, — By bounie Scotland's Tartan sheen, — By England's Rose — by Britain's Queen, — By the red cross their fathers bore To victory on every shore . — By Gallia's glorious tricolor; — to join heartily in the prayer with which I conclude. There must be parties, I suppose, and they must fight over the loaves and fishes ; and when the fight is done. •' And they who win at length divide the prey, " (Corsair.) there may be some mild differences of opinion among the win- ners as to their respective shares, and the manner in which the said prey can be best divided — for the advantage of the country. But all parties agree that the Yankees must not have the " fishes, " without ^ fair compensation, in which all Canadians shall have an equal share, 164 The Anthem. THE ANTHEM. 1867 JUBILATE ET AMATE CANADENSES. 1887 God save the land we love, Shower blessings from above On Canada : Let her fair fame extend, Her progress never end, In her two nations blend, Britain and France. Each has a glorious name High on the roll of Fame; — Noblesse oblige : — May we be noble too. Nobly to think and do, All to each other true, And to our Queen. Fast joined m heart and hand, Proud of their goodly land, And of their Sires, — Let all Canadians then, Gaul, Gael, or British men, Sing, with a loud Amen, God save the Queen. Vive la Eeine. Phia sabhoil a Banrigh. Amen, 111 The Anthem. 165 " And thus shall, Canada, which from her hand Received self government in freest form, And Ottawa to which she gave the palm, As the Queen city of this fair Dominion ; — With loyal hearts of every race or creed, With her Empire's wide circumference, Join in the patriot prayer, — God save the Queen." Ottawa, Ist July, 1887. G. W. WiCKSTEED. Note. — " I do not want the walls of separation between different orders of Christians, or Nationalities, to be destroyed, but only lowered, that we may shake hands a little easier over them " The words in Italics are mine, the rest are those of the Revd. Rowland Hill ; and very goods words they are. G. W. W. I ?' NOTES Apology. — Pngc viii. Some of my readers may not know the short poem in question or its tra- gic sequel : — The words are " When taken, to he well shaken." The attendant, not having graduated under Miss Nightingale, applies them to the patient instead of to the physic. The Doctor inquires after the effect of his prescription and learns the fact; the consequence is dramatically told in the following dialogue : What ! sh;ike a patient, man ; — a shake won't do. — No, Sir, and so we gave him two. — Two shakes, — Odd's curse. 'Twould make a patient worse 1 It did so, Sir, and so a third we tried. Well, and what then? — Then, Sir, my master died The poem was short and char ; but the clearest and best writings are ^iable to misinterpretation. Think of Galileo, and the authority adduced for bishop-burning and the Inquisition. Even my Waifs might be misinterpre- ted, but for the great intelligence and kindness of my readers. " Thou England art my Country and my Home." — Page 10. This was written fifty-seven years ago. Since then I have been constantly resident in this Country, aud have learned '' not to love England less, but to love Canada more." I married in Canada, and my children are Canariians by birth. I was bom at Liverpool, in December, 1 "99. My father was a member of the Cheshire and Shropshire family of our name. My mother of a Lancashire family, by name Tatlock. I came to Canada, in 1821, on the invitation <.f my uncle, Mr. Fletcher, who was soon afterwards appointed Judge of the then new District of St. Francis, and remained so for 22 years, ii Notes. until his decease in 1844. I had studies mechanical engineering in England, and was for some time employed in work connected with that profession. The gout du premier metier \% not (\yuiQ extinguished in me, and I still take great interest in engineering matters. But in 1825 I commenced the study of the law under the late Col Gugy, to whot^e family I had been introduced in 1821, by the late Mr. Andrew t-tuart. In the fall of 1828, I entered the service of the Legislative Assembly of L. C as Assistant Law Clerk, Mr. Wilian, Col. Gugy's brother-in-law, b ing my principal. He was afterwards made Clerk of the Crown and Peace, and Mr. William Green became my chief: he died of cholera in 1832, and was succeeded by the Honble. Hiigues Heney, who eventually got into trouble with the House, by becoming an Ex- ecutive Councillor, and was removed ; the late Mr. Etienne Parent was appoin- ted in his stead, but never acted; — the times of trouble came on, the Cons- titution was suspended, and the Special Couicil for L. C. constituted : and after some time I became one of its officers under the Attorney-General, Mr. Ogden. In 1841, on the motion of Mr. John Neilson, I was appointed Law Clerk and Chief English Translator to the Legislative Assembly of the Pro- vince of Canada :— and in 1867 to the same office in the House of Commons of Canada, and I hold it still. In 1841 I was appointed with the Honble. Mr. Heney and Mr. A. Buchanan, a Commissionner for revising the Statutes and Ordinances of Lower Canada, with the present Mr. Justice Johnson for our Secretary. In 1854 His Excellency the Earl of Elgin gave me my silk gown. In 1856 I was appointed with Sir J. B. Macauly, Ex. C. J., and five other gentlemen from Upper Canada, and Messrs. A. Polette, K. MacKay A. Stuart and T. J. J. Loranger, (all now Judges,) and Mr. Geo. De Boucher- ville, (now Clerk of the Legislative Council,) from Lower Canada, a Commis- sionner to " examine, revise, consolidate and classify" the Public General Statutes of Canada. The Upper Canada Commissioners undertook the Sta- tutes affecting their Province, and the Lower Canada those aii'ectiug theirs, all the Commissioners undertaking those affecting the whole of Canada. The three Volumes were reported to the Legislature in 1859 and 1860, examined and passed, the Governor being authorized to cause the Statutes of the Session to be ircorporated with the work of the Commissioners; which was done for Upper Canada by the Hon. Sir James Macauly, one of the Comniiss-ioners, — for Lower Canada by me, — and for all Canada by Sir James and me jointly In 1864-5 I was a Commissioner with Ex-Chancellor Blake and Mr. Justice Day for fixfng the remiinoration to be paid by the Government to the several Railway Companies for the carriage of the Mails. These Commissions were official or professional. In Lower Notes. iii Canada I had luen one of the Commissioners for biiiidiiig tlie Parliament House at Quebec, and ior divt rs other public works. On the death of Mr. Lindsay, Senior, Sir Geo. Carti^r oflered me tlie Clerkship of the Legis- lative Assembly, but told me the Government would prefer my remaining in my then position, whicli he considered at least as important. He pro- mised that it slionld be made equally good in rank and emolument; and it was made so accordingly. I have been twice married in Canada, tirst to the second daughter of John Gray, first President of the Bank of Montreal, and secondly to the eldest daughter ot Captain John Fletcher of H M. 72nd Kegiment, then an officer of H. M. Imperial Customsat Quebec : and I have been a householder in each of the five Cities which have been the Seats of Govern- ment. I think, therefore, that I may now fairly call myself a Canadian, without ceasing to remenber that I am English born. I write this brief memoir for the information of my children and my younger or uew3r friends. The Fancy Ball at Eideau.— Pano 48 o The little article on Lord Dufferin's Ball is out of j lace as to date, but its subject is so cognate to the Fancy Ball in the Parliament House at Quebec that the anachronism may be pardoned. The Fancy sirgers at the Quebec Ball were all of3Scers ol the Lower Town Volunteers Lord Gosfordwas himself the most good-natured and jolliest of Governors and of hosts. The •' Inconstants." — Page 59, H. M. S. '^ Inconstant" w&s really the loveliest vessel of the twelve ; and though the officers of all the ships were, as sailor officers always are, high in favor with the ladies, yet soniehow the " Inconstants" stood fir.-t. Possibly there was a charm in the name. Quebec Transcript.— Pages 69 and 76. The Transcript was a very nice little literary paper edited by my friend Mrs Grant, of the " Stray Leaves, " and her sister, (the M. K. of page 78,) and printed by Mr. T. Donoghue, their brother; but it was before the age and died young, as things fair and fragile will do. 13 ! iv Notes. Page 74. " The Lord of high pretence " wag of course Lord Durham, who kindlj commuted the sentence of some of the rebels, and sent them to BermudH, where of course they were released on habeas corpus, and the Lord was called over the coals in Parliament. " Good 8ir John " was Sir John Colborne who put down the rebellion with a firm but merciful hand. Pag 93. The Hon. John Neilson, to whose memory I have here paid the tribute of a few lines, was the fii>t Editor of a Canadian newspaper in English, dating 1 think from 1769. He enjoyed the perfect confiilence of the French Cana- dians, and represented the County of Quebec in the Legislative Assembly until he opposed the 92 resolutions and the violent measures then resorted to, and lost his election; but he was again restored to favor and elected to the Parliament of United Canada in 1841, a sobered man as to some of his former opinions, but a true patriot and a firm supporter of free institutions. He was ever my good friend. I have put into the mouths of others what I myself felt on losing him, but 1 know that they felt as I did. " Her sons have abandoned their errors and shame." —Page 98, After Lord Elgin gave the Royal Assent to the Rebellion Losses Bill, and the consequent burning of the Parliament House, the annexation feeling became very strong in Montreal, even among the formerly mostloyal citizens, and the removal of the Seat of Government did not tend to allay it. It died out gradually, and is now extinct in Montreal as in the rest of Canada. Page 100. I have referred to this little squib in my " Apology " The Seigniorial Act was passed in 1854. Mr. Drummond brought it in and very ingeniously contrived the Seigniorial Court, which finally settled the disputed points relative to the tenure. Mr. Dunkin most ably and zealously explained and defended the rights of the Seigniors, and I, with the potent aid of Mr. Hincks, succeeded in getting the lads et ventes abolished, the Seigniors being ■fc' Notes. compensated on equitable terms out of provincial funds. Mr. Drummond and his friends wished to apply the government aid to the reduction of the heavy rents exacted by some Seigniors, but these, if unlawful, could be reduced by the Court .• the lods eJ ventes, a fine of one twelfth of the value, not of (he land (done hwi oi all buildings and improvements on it, vfere perfectly lawful, but a hindrance to all improvement and to all free dealing with the land, while they were a constant source of attempted fraud on the Seignior and of vexation to tenants : nnd no fair terms of compensation by the tenants for their abolition could be contrive 1, because while they bore so heavily on those who wished to improve or were willing or compelled to sell their lands, they were not felt by others who had their lands from their fathers and meant to leave them to their children. Mr. Drummond for some time opposed the amendment but eventually acceded to it. The Act went into force and was perfectly successful; so completely was every difficulty remo- ved under its operation, that in the Act passed in 1856 for codifying the Laws of Lower Canada, the Commissioners were forbidden to say any thing of the Seigniorial Tenure. '• The great ten thousand pounder Hincks. " — Pag-e 105. It is, I hope, unnecessary to say, that this has no reference whatever to Mr. Hincks' income or fortune, but simply to the tremendous weight of metal he carried, and the great initial velocity he could give it. Sir John Macdonald brought in the Clergy Reserves Bill and carried it, with the very efficient aid ot Mr. Hincks, then an independent member and not in the coa- lition administration. " Let both divide the Crown, " for both deserve it — The whole Civil Service of Canada owes a deep debt of gratitude to Sir Francis Hincks for the Superannuation Act, an invaluable boon to every member of the service, and not the less so to the Government when wisely used, — as of course it will always be. I never assisted with greater pleasure in preparing any Bill than this. H. M. Ephemeral Government. — Page 108, This was a Conservative Coup d" Etat. In his late Pamphlet " A Constitu- tional Governor " Mr Todd records it thus: — " In 1858, upon the defeat of Mr John A Macdonald's ministry by an adverse vote in the Legislative Assembly upon the question of the Seat of VI Notes. Government, the Governor General (Sir Edmund Head) appointed the Brown-Dorion Administration Before the new Ministers bad taken their seats, or announced their policy, the Legislative Assembly passed a Vole declaring a Want of Confidence in them. They requested the Governor to dissolve Parliament His Excellency acknowledged his obligation " to deal fairly with all political parties: but (he considered that) he had also a duty to perform to the Queen and the people of Canada, paramount to that which he owed to any one party; or to all parties whatsoever." He therefore declined to di.ssolve Parliament at this juncture, for stated reasons, and espe- cially because a General Election had already taken place within a year. Upon which Mr. Brown, on behalf of himself and his colleagues, resigned office, and the late administration was recalled. " But he does not give the picturesque movement from whii.li the incident received (from its opponents) the name of " The Double Shuffle."— The law which required that a member accepting office should resign and go to his constituents for re-election, had a proviso that this should not apply to Ministers resigning one office and accepting another, also ministerial, within one month ; so while the game of" Fox and Getse'" was in progress, a little game of'' Puss in the Corner" was played on the other side;— each of the old ministers accepted another office than that he had before held, and then resigned that and accepted his old one again And lo ! each appeared in his old place in about a week: and there is no doubt that they were within the law. The question was mooted in the House (in the case of Mr. Sidney Smith) on the 7th July and decided in their favor. The same proviso is repeated in the Dominion Act 31 V. c. 25; but in the Bill of this Session (1878) words are added excepting the case of a change of Administration. " Ninety Groats. " — Page 109. Equal to thirty shillings or six dollars, the daily pay of a member in those times, — expressed in terms cognate to the subject, " Fellowes' Voters or a Feed, &c.'' — Page 111, The Voters were of the/ancy kind : the feeds, if not quite so, had at least the angelic quality of infrequency. Notes. vii Old Christ Church — Pai^e 112 &" A copy of tliis little poem lies in the hollow of the corner stone of the new Church. Archdeacon Lauder saw it in the Times, and liked it. Without knowing whose it was, he printed it at the end of his last sermon in the old Church, and the sermon and poem lie buried together in that stone. Epitaph on By-Town — Paire 132. Mr. Lett and I cannot be jealous of each other. — I donft know whether he like.s my brevity, but I dcliji;ht in his powers of ampliticiition. His force and fire almost make one imagine he writes by steam, his engine being of course high pressure and non-condensing. But his sentiments are noble and patriotic, and his style earnest, vigorous and manly. Magis magisque floreat. The White- WA^H Bill and Amendments — Page 132. The House eventually passed the Bill, substantially in the form suggested by Mr. Verdant Green, without the Preamble, but with the Proviso " don't do so again " — Mr. Deep Black's amendment finding no seconder. Many members have since resigned under its provisions, and almost all of them have been re-elected. The Act says nothing about profits (if any) obtained by the violation of the law, leaving the question open, as a matter of con- science on which Honorable Members could scarcely have any doubt. Ham- let's Uncle had a very strong opinion on the point : — "Then I'll look up,- My fault is past— But oh what form of prayer Can serve my turn :— Forgive me my foul murder, — That cannot be, since still I am possessed Of those effects for which I did the murder, My Crown, mine own ambition and my Queen : — May one be pardoned and retain the offence ? " Hamlet, Act 3, Sc. 3. C. A. v.— Page 113. For the benefit of unprofessional gentlemen I explain, and for that of non- cerulean ladies I translate. The letters stand for Curia Advisare Vult, the the court wishes to deliberate: and mean, that the judges are puzzled aqd (Jpn't exactly know what to sav, viii Notes. The Coup d'Etat— Paire 134 This was a Reform Coup d'Etat and a very clever one. It would never have done to allow Mr. Irving to make his report. Like the Conservative one immortalized on page 108 et sequ. it was perfectly within the law, and saved a wonderful amount of trouble and confusion. OTT.AWA, St. George's day, 23rd April, 1878. Leap Year Valentine. — Page 130. This may be useful in the present or any future Leap Year. It is very straightforward and eft'ective, but requires to be used with caution, as it would certainly support an action for breach, if the lady should change her mind. The Queen or the heiress apparent has a perpetual Leap year, and proposes to whom she pleases, and in the latest case on record was grate- fully accepted S )METHING ABOUT Eag-MONEY. — PagO 140. I have always had a horror of irredeemable paper, and helped, with plea- sure, to demolish any little bill or scheme tending that way : and I have known even M P.'s with a leaning towards it. I must have had some attempt of the sort in my mind when I dreamt the dream I have recorded. Mr. Wallace was a ring leader in favor of the Rag. In Memoriam — Sir Geouge Etienne Cartier.— Pa of west longitude from Greenwich being chosen as the standard to be used by railways within the territory bounded by the meri- dians of 67^0 and 82^o, including the Atlantic States and a large part of Canada. The same rule was to be observed for the whole distance across our continent. This system was nominally adopted by a very large majo- rity of the American and Canadian railways. But it was found difficult to abide by it in some cases, in consequence of the sudden jump of an hour in time in passing from one time zone to another, as many railways in both countries must do; and it seems the Grand Trunk, Great Western and Canadian Pacific are each run into two time zones within Ontario, and the Intercolonial into two such zones in Quebec, New Brunswick and Nova Scotia. There must be many railways in the United States wiiich violate the conference rule in like manner, and this is a very great imperfection in the rule itself. But this is a matter for the consideration of the railway magnates themselves. The matter to which I desire to call your attention is the legal aspect of the case. Many people (not lawyers, of course) seem to suppose that standard time has become Icf/al time, and seem inclined to govern themselves and their doings by it, thus putting the railway managers in the place of the Legisla- ture. Now, looking for the moment at Ontario alone, standard time at London is about twenty-four minutes earlier than legal time ; and there are 14 Xll Appendix. places in Essex where the jump occurs from one time zone to another, and at which standard time is an hour earlier on one side of an invisible line than on the other. Now our Act 32-33 V., c 21, § 1, dt-fines " night "for the purposes of that Act as commencing at " nine o'clock in the evening of each day and ending at six o'clock in the morning of the next succeeding day, " so that by standard time it would be night on one side of the line when it was day on the other ; and by sec. 50, hvrglary is defined to be the commission of certain offences in the night only, so that the same offence would be burglary on one side of the line and not on the other. Mr. Robertson, of Hamilton, has now a Bill before the House of Commons making burglary punishable by imprisonment in the penitenticiry for life. Fancy a man tried for burglary in the neighbourhood of that line, and a question arising as to the hour when the offence was committed. But, even in London, the offence would be burglary twenty-four minutes earlier in the evening by standard than by legal time, and the offender, if hn did not break in, would have twentv-four minutes longer to break out. Then, again, the Ontario Revised fc^tatute, c. Ill, §22, provides that no Registrar shall receive any instrument for registration except within the hours of ten in the forenoon and four in the afternoon, and he is to endorse on the instru- ment registered not only the year, month and day, but the hour and minute of registration. Now, suppose him to shut and open his office in London by standard time ; he would shut it twenty-four minutes before and open it twenty-four minutes before legal time. Might he not do serious wrong to a person whose mortgage or other claim he received or refused illegally ? And might he not be liable in htavy damages for doing so? Or suppose a Retur- ning Officer closing or opening his poll twenty-four minutes before or after the legal time ; or a tavern-keeper doing the same by his bar ; or a case of insurance with a policy expiring at noon, and a loss occurring after standard but before legal noon or vice versa. And so of an infinite variety of cases, where time is the essence of the act done ai-d its effect. In England, where they look closely into the consequences of such things, difficulties of this kind were foreseen when GrecLwich time was adopted for all England in 1880, and an Act, 43-44 V. c. 9, was passed making it /e^ai time which, of course, they knew it would not otherwise be. I can believe that the advantages of the change may there have been greater than the disad- vantages; for England is comparatively small, and the greatest diflerence between standard and the old legal time is only about twenty-two minutes^ and there is no jump of an hour; tlie sea bounds the time zone, so that no one can mistake it; and they have taken care to leave Dublin time for \ Apj^endix. xiii Ireland. Our case, and that of tlie United States, is different. We liave five jumps of one hour each ; and with all due respect for the railway authorities, I think it would have been better if thej- had adopted or would adopt the time of 90o west longitude as the standard for the United States and Canada right across the continent — one railway time without jumps or breaks, and the two oceans for the limits of the time zone : leaving local time for the ordinary purposes of lite. A clock with two hour and minute hands, or hands with two points, would show legal and standard time at once; and there would be no places with two standard times, as there are now at the boundary of each time zone. I am informed that the authorities of the Naval Observatory at Washington hold the same opinion. — If any but the present legal time is to be used as such the change should be made by law, as it was in England. In the United States, it appears, that every State has power to fix its own legal time ; Congress has it only for the District of Columbia (ten miles square, I believe), and has exercised the power by an Act adopting standard time of 75" west longitude. But the said district is smaller than England, and there could hardly be a minute of time diflerence between anj' two places in it In Canada, T think the power rests with the Dominion Government, except in relation to subjects under the exclusive control of the Local Legislatures. I am of opinion that there should be no change in the legal time ; that Canada is too big to adopt one legal time for its sixty or seventy degrees of longitude, and that no jump system could be made rational and workable in law. I hold that the Dominion Government and the Governments of the several Provinces should state authoritatively that the mean solar time of each place remains as hitherto the legal time thereat, and that all ofiicers and functionaries must so consider it, and open and elose their offices and be governed in the performanee of their duties by it and by no other. At the International Conference for the purpose of fixing a prime meridian and universal day, held at Washington in October last, such Universal Day to begin and end at the same moment all over the world as it does at Greenwich, was adopted " for all the purposes for which it may be found convenient, and which shall not interfere with the use of local or other standard time where desirable. " It would have made the day at Toronto begin at seventeen and a-half minutes before what we now call seven p. m. and Sunday would begin at that time on Saturday. I think this would not be " found convenient, " and that we in Canada shall not adopt it. It has always been used at Greenwich, I believe, for astronomical purposes, except that the day began at noon, and is to begin at midnight. It is excellent for xiv Appendix. scientific puposes ; and, for the adoption of Greenwich as the first meridian, England, and all men of English blood and tongue owe a debt of gratitude to the Conference and to Sandford Fleming. I am, dear Sir, very truly yours, W. This was written on the adoption of the (so called) Standard Time by the railway authorities, and when many people fancied that it had become legal time; a fancy which might have led to very serious consequences I had asked some questions of the authorities of the Observatory at Washington and of the Astronomer Royal, and received very courteous answers. The gentlemen at Washington thought with me, that the better plan would be, one railway time, (that of 90o West,) across the contiennt, and the Astronomer Royal seemed to incline the same way, as it would agree better with that adopted iu England and with his grander plan hereinafter mentioned. The Railway gentlemen preferred their own plan, as for railway purposes they had a perfect right to do. I have mentioned some of the objections to its adoption for general purposes. To these the Astronomer Royal assented, but answered that they could be overcome by legislation as in England, and the District of Columbia, and as I had suggested. I called the attention of the Minister of Justice to the matter, and he agreed with us, but thought it would be wise to pause before adopting cm;/ new scheme, saying there could be no doubt that the old mode of reckoning time is and would remain the legal one until altered by law. I hope that Registrars, Returning Ofticers, and other public functionaries, have seen that it is so, and governed themselves accordingly. Even for railway purposes the Zone scheme is imperfect ; the Zones have never been defined, and meridian lines which no body can find will not do for bounding them ; if made legal they must be defined by known metes and bounds. The Astronomer Royal, Mr. Fleming, and the Longitude Conference, have propounded a grand scheme for a Universal Day and one Time for the whole world. It is admirable for scientific purposes, tho' perhaps, for the reason I have mentioned, not quite convenient for every day purposes ; And is it quite consistent with the Conference "decision to reckon Longitude East and West, I8O0 each way ; and may not the several nations ol the world possibly object to be ruled by England, which would alone have a natural and natu- rally divided day, in domestic time reckoning, tho' they may consent to be so as to the nautical matter of longitude: the plan may however come into general use before Volapuk, the Scientific Universal language. Appendix. xv The 24 hours day is excellent, and for Time tables especiallj' so, and has been long used in Italy and elsewhere ; but its use must be optional with A. M. and P. M , and ladies must have five o'clock or seventeeen o'clock tea at their pleasure. SOCIALISM. What is Socialism ? What do Focialists want, and believe they have a right to insist upon ? The fullest and most direct answers to these questions seem to be those contained in an article by Annie Besant. in the July number, 1886, of the Westminster Bevieio. She begins by quoting the saying of Professor Huxley, " that he would rather have been born a savage in one of the Fiji Islands than in a London slum,'" — declares the Professor right, and gives n asons, not easily disputable by those who know what a London slum is, for the declaration. She then states the growth of the doctrine she expounds: the decay of religious belief among the classes interested, the in- fluence of foreign writers, more especially the Gtrman, and the modification of their doctrine by the habits of English life and their Democratic tendency, and says that " no mere abuse can shake the J>ocialist; no mere calling of names can move him ; he holds a definite economic theory, which should neither be rejected without examination, nor accepted without study." She maintains that Socialists assent to all the sound doctrines of political eco- nomy, and more especially that cajiital is the unconsumed result of past and present labor : but they hold, — that individual jiropt-rty in land must disap- pear, that the soil on which a nation is born and lives ought to belong to the nation as a whole and be cultivated by individuals and co-operative groups holding directly under the State ; that capital always has been, and must be, obtained from the partial confiscation of the results of the labor of others, and is not found in the hands of the laborious and industrious, but of the idleis who have profited by such confiscation. She says, — the laborer is not free ; nominall)' he may be, but in reality he is no more free than the slave. The slave is free to refuse to work, and take in exchange the lash, the prison, and the grave, and such freedom only has the laborer; if he refuses to work he must take the lash of hunger, the prison of the workhouse, or, for continued refusal, the ^aol. The remedy Is the abolition of the land- lord and the capitalist Interest on capital has no place in Socialism, strongly as it protests against the whole system of which landlords and capi- talists form an integral part, it reserves its uttermosts reprobation for the xvi Appendix. theory which justifies ;i class of the latter in living solely on money drawn as interest on investments So long as capital remains in private hands interest will be demanded and paid perforce for its use, and so long there will be an idle class ; a burden on the industrious who may labor for their support. Socialism aims at rendering the existence of an idle class impos- sible. Healthy adults will have to work for things tbay require. The very young, the old, the sick, will be free from labor ; but for the strong and mature no bread of idleness, no sponging upon the people. In thus condemning an idle class, socialism does not assail the individuals who now compose it ; they are not to blame for the social conditions in which they were born ; it is one of the most hopeful signs for the Socialistic movement that many who are working in it belong to the very classes that will be abolished by it ; they can do no good by throwing their fortunes away, and plnngiog into the present competitive struggle; all they can do is to live simply, and use their position as a pedestal on which to place their advocacy of Socialist propa- ganda. There is no fear that individualism will be crushed. Exhausting toil and growing anxiety, these crush out individuality and stifle genius. Social- ism will give leisure as w<'ll as work to all, lift the burden of care from all shoulders, and allow time to think and to endeavour. She adopts the doc- trine of Malthus, except his objection to early marriages, for which she would substitute prudential restraint, and twits him quietly of having eleven children, thinks the doctrine is essential to the success of Socialism, and that highly educated women, full of interest in public work, and taking their share of public duty, will not consent to spend year after year of their prime in nothing but expecting, bearing, and suckling babies, and she concludes with the foihiwing emplmtic passage : '' A glance backward over the history of our own country since the Reform Bill of 1732 opened the gate of political power to those outside the sacred circle of the aristocracy, will tell how an unconscious movement towards Socialism has been steadily growing in strength. Our Factory Acts, our Mine Regulation Acts, our Land Acts, all show the set of the current. The idea of the State as an outside power is fading, and the idea of the State as an organized community is coming into prominence. In the womb ot time the new organism is growing; shall the new birth come in peace or in revolution, heralded by patient endeavour, or by the roar of cannon ? This one thing I know, that come it will, whether men work for it or hinder ; for all the mighty forces of evolution make for Socialism, for the establishment of the brotherhood of man." Appendix. xvii The article, of wliicli I have endeavoured to give the substance in a con- densed form, is inserted in the" independent section" of tlie Review, set apart " for the reception of able articles which, though harmonizing with its general spirit, may contain opinions at variance with the particular ideas or measures it advocates. " Very able indeed tlie writer shows herself in the statement of the views and intentions of Socialism, and it is well that these should be widely known, for they concern us all. Forewarned is forearmed, and knowing what they are we shall be better prepared to deal with them, and they strike at the veiy root of civilization and progress, in abolishing the right of property, and forbidding a man's enjoying or leaving to his children the enjoyment of the fruit of his labour, which is the great motive of exertion, bodily or mental. To all fair means of promoting the more general distribution of wealth, and diminishing the hardships of poverty, — by representation, by Ihe associa- tion of workers, and by laws such as the writer refers to as passed by the I'.ritish Parliament, there is no objection, and I rejoice with her at the spirit which led to their enactment. The writer has told us what she wishes for, but she has not told us by what means her wishes are to be carried into effect, or what are the enactments by which she would provide for the division of all existing wealth equally among all, furnishing all with work equally well paid, and compelling them to perform it. The raising of the common fund, and the division of it equally among all would be no easy matter, and requi- res explanation. The scheme of general confiscation would probably be resisted. There must be government of some kind to enforce it, and we have a right to know how such government is to be constituted and main- tained. The proper carrying out of the Malthusiau ck)ctrine which the writer declares (very truly) to be essential to the success of Socialism, would require some rather difficult and delicate legislation. With every wish to believe in her good intentions, I can hardly think the writer expects to induce the millionaire to divide his millions with the labourei-s by moral suasion ; and indeed her last paragraph would seem to imply — " quietly if possible, forcibly if we must." There may be a gentle touch of dynamite in her " come it will." To me her scheme seems absurd as it is dangerous, and to be possible only if and when it shall please heaven to endue all of us with equal strength of arm and brain, with the same powers, wants, and wishes, and with such perfect faith in the Socialist dispensation as will pre- clude all desire of progress or improvement of condition. — What may come to pass in Europe, with its ever increasing population and apparent want of useful employment for it, I do not know : the prospect is not bright, and xviii Appendix. even Punch speaks anxiously in woids and cartoon, and the Laureate denounces it in patriotic and prophetic verse. But " there's a divinity that shapes our ends, rough hew them as we may,' and that shaping will be for good. In America there is less reason for anxiety. The Knights of Labor do not adopt Socialism or Anarchy; and in Harper' s Weekly of 6 th Novem- ber latt there is and excellent article by P. M. Arthur, Grand Chief of the Brotherhood of Locomotive Engineers, in which he maintains there is no antagonism between labor and capital which cannot be easily overcome.— He says, " Every man of industrious habits may hope to become a capitalist ; indeed, the desire to accumulate is one of the most powerful instruments for the regeneration of society, it supplies the basis for individual energy and activity. 1 have no sympathy with men who claim that might is right, and that the rich owe the poor a living " Let us try to dimini.sh the amount of poverty, and to mitigate its evils by legislation in the spirit of that referred to with approval by Annie Besant, and by all other means that wisdom may suggest ; there is the highest authority for doing this, by the exercise of brotherly love and christian charity in the highest sense of the words, but none for confiscation, robbery, or violence. Poverty has its hard.-hips, and we must strive earneftly to remove or diminish them ; but difterence of wealth or station has but a limited influence on human happiness, and is a far less evil than what Socialism proposes to substitute for it: Order is heaven's first law, and this confe.ssed Some are — nay, must be greater than the rest ; More rich, more wise ; but who Infers from hence That such are happier, shocks all commons sence. w. The Week, 1387. mfl^smm' m^^^^^mi^'', CD31DbSTS3 .--^:*tr-. W§>