; <> V-?y ORIGINAL CHARADES BY L. B. R. BRIGGS Dulce et decorum est de sip ere in loco NEW YORK CHARLES SCRIBNER'S SONS 1891 Copyright, 1891, by Charles Seribner's Sons B73 PREFACE. That awful metrical necessity which critics call "free handling" or "poetic license" has constrained me now and then to give two syllables to " My First " or " My Second," instead of the orthodox one. The reader will pardon the heresy if he can, and will also condone those few lines in which inspi- ration demolishes syntax* L. B. R. B. * "Negligence in expression, often the consequence of a noble ardour." George Campbell : The Philosophy of Rhet- oric. iz \1Z^ 0%IGI&{*JIL CHy$%ADES OF THI UNIVERSITY I Man fain would keep my first ; alas the clay ! It turneth pale and hasteneth away. Great Caesar's laurels hid the loss he bore, A loss the vengeful prophet knew of yore. Bright as the "gem of purest ray serene," My new-made second firm, erect, and keen. Exposures tarnish ; straining burdens bend; To earth it falls, and no man knows its end. O lovely woman, thou who canst forego Prosperity, and smile on frowning woe ; Bear sorrow, sickness, death, yet not re- pine Without my whole what happiness were thine ? n. My first is foremost in the selfish mind ; My second, foremost in the marching throng. The two, in order natural combined, To Russia and to her alone belong. My third's a humble tiller of the ground ; My whole, a knight for chivalry renowned. in. My First. Where Castilia's lovely daughters Fan the summer air, By the Douro's rippling waters Lies my castle fair. My Second. Lock and double-lock the closet, I can baffle you ; I, the skeleton, because it " Is my nature to." My Whole. Where's the orator that's richer In his gift of tongues Than this humble little pitcher With the iron lungs ? 5 IV. " My first ! My first ! " Lord Marmion cried, And then forever slept. My second, when a lovely boy, A lovely temple kept. I looked upon my whole I looked, And turned away, and wept. y. My First. Bound on a voyage perilous and dark, I fleck the waters with my tiny bark. To famine, pestilence, and storm a prey, Imperious fool, I strut my little day. My Second. " Darkness that might be felt/' 'twas Egypt's doom Thus to be shrouded in a tactile gloom. Even so the winter months with me have dealt, Mine is the darkness then that may be felt. 7 My Third. Mine is the task the tawny skin to keep ; My bark is swallowed by the waters deep ; On the stout farmer's face my sign is found ; My bark is scattered on the ruddy ground. My Whole. A little island, what have I to boast But scanty acres and secluded coast, Provincial speech and basely-gotten wealth, And showy fashions and precarious health? Yet over continents my fame is whirled, The pride, the glory of the freeborn world ! VI. Arising, on the mountain side, I scorn the lowly grotto. Ascension is my life, my pride ; Excelsior, my motto. Behead me, and behold the same Phenomenon surprising ; And still I keep a rising name, Though nevermore arising. Behead me like the slaughtered cock, I sing in mutilation ; And sing though yet again you dock, And scorn decapitation. I am a good old Saxon word ; No vulgar modern sham, I. My little story you have heard : I pray you guess what am I ? V VII The queen with beauty's fatal gift accurst Calmly laid down my second on my first. Thus can the mind the body frail control, And every man be valiant but my whole. 10 vin. My first we breathe upon the listening air In sorrow, sickness, rapture, love, and prayer, And sing it in our melodies devotional ; And you and I, if we a finger jam, Employ my first, whereas they say that "D n" Is used among the recklessly emotional. My next, like Puck, encompasses the land With viewless and imaginary band. 'Tis boiling hot, or freezing cold, or medium. By such as this, and such embraces round (Chiastically placed) the earth is bound. (My pedantry, I trust, is free from tedium.) 11 My whole I don't know anything about, And yet uncontradicted may, no doubt, In modesty observe what I am next-to-say : To wit, that chemists and the like declare That if my whole would saturate the air, We all should jump and caper in an ecstasy. Fill me with this, and mark if I retire One step for famine, pestilence, or fire ; Or seven-headed monster known to Patmos fear : For, if you see me waver in the least Before the brute (or any other beast) My whole is insufficient in the atmosphere. 12 IX. [From the New England Primer.]* My First. I cannot claim A perfect name. My Second. I mind papa But not mamma. My Whole. It wasn't fair To cut my hair. * Without permission. 13 X. On royalty itself my first may gaze, Yet loves the fireside better than the court. Sleep and the chase absorb his nights and days, A patient hunter in a humble sport. In Eden whilom dwelt a happy pair (He was for valor formed and she for grace). My next is half the man that wandered there ; My next is still the foremost of its race. 14 My third, the constant comrade of the fair, May " sport with Amaryllis in the shade, Or with the tangles of Nesera's hair," Alas that none but women should up- braid ! Revile me not for dark and tortuous ways ; Revile me not for long and vapory gloom. Of old I had my hospitable days, An awful refuge from a martyr's doom. 15 XI. " The Courtin'." When Zekle once the silence burst, And kissed his blushing bride, She looked my second, gave my first, And looked my whole beside. 16 XII. The sanguine youth in life's expectant morn Leaps to his joy, as to the manner born ; But thou, my first, with grave objection fraught, Canst check his zeal with sober second thought. Where trade, my second, throngs the busy mart ; Where rise the trophies of mechanics' art ; Where freighted vessels dare the stormy sea, No tale so ponderous but is told by thee. Emblem of union, thy perfections round, My whole, near all but heathen lives are found. Thy plural gives the name to low estate. And decks the living pages of the great. 17 XIII. Bkeak ! Break ! Break ! My first, on the rocks and the sand. May I never be vexed for the want of my next In the touch of a bountiful hand. Break ! Break ! Break ! And shiver the ship on the shore My whole shall abide on the top of the tide Till the wind shall blow no more. 18 XIV. My first, portentous goddess, at her birth With countless stars illuminates the earth. My next is off like arrow from the bow, When auri sacra fames bids her " Go ! " All apparitions that can chill the soul Are found in thee, my horror-breathing whole. 19 XV. Stung by the torments of the goddess cruel, My first and second, once a maid ro- mantic, Now when the pain gave to her frenzy fuel, Cried " O my second ! " in her anguish frantic. "I burn ! I starve ! No prayer of mine is heard ! I cannot tarry, even to do my third ! " Dark as the ocean when the clouds are lowering, Fierce as the burning of the tropic sky, Blue as the violet to the tempest cower- ing So dark, so fierce, so blue so strange am I. I shrivel, parch, and crack, yet not in vain : Proudly at last I triumph over pain. 20 XVI. My first the teamster's cart will do ; My second cleaves the waters blue ; My whole is often in a stew. 21 XVII. My First. Black is the night, and black the wintry sky; Black is the orb of fond Xarifa's eye ; Black are the locks of Andalusia's maids, The boding raven's wing, the ace of spades, And traitors' hearts, and mournful cypress trees : But I in blackness yield to none of these. 22 My Second. Hail, kindly Culture, rich in chaste delights, Who softenest the minds of brutish wights ! No more the tender throat of maid or wife Is rudely threatened by the treacherous knife. Avaunt, Discourtesy, thou churl abhorred ! I have redeemed the hospitable board. My Whole. Through the hot noontide of a summer's clay The sweating farmer stacks the new-made hay. Strewing the breezes with a fragrance rare, He heaves the sunny burden high in air. The fields are glad ; the skies serenely shine : The world is his to-day ; the humble service mine. 23 XVIII. My first, a rival of the noble Isis, You find in every rational geography. My whole exposes many a painful crisis In this the great my second of photog- raphy. 24 XIX. Behold my first, the red man false or true, The peaceful Ponca or the savage Sioux ! Hark how my second, risen at break of day, Tunes on the oval shell her matin lay ! My third, the symbol crude of speechless joy, Expands the features of the rustic boy. My whole, a nameless champion, staked his life To win a curious traitor for a wife. 25 XX. If a chicken Droop and sicken, Ten to one it has my first. If a baby Cry, it may be That my second is the worst 111 he's heir to ; Yet it's fair to Question whether in my whole (Out of season) Lies the reason Why his tears defy control. 20 XXI. When giddy amateurs their powers engage To strut in tinsel glory on the stage, Behold the fitness of my every part For blushing buds of histrionic art : My first the conscious beauty dons with grace ; My second aids her, with admiring face ; My third she takes among the actors' parts ; My whole she speaks to captivated hearts. 27 J XXII. My First. On me the merry little fays Dance, and sing their roundelays, When the moon is shining. My Second. In me the thrifty farmer's hoard, Store of golden grain, is poured, Free for my refining. My Whole. Where the robins build their nests ; Where the cricket chirrups ; 28 Where the horseman idly rests, Turning in the stirrups ; Where the milkmaid swings her pail ; Where the cheery little quail All the season whistles ; Where the white and golden daisies Share the best of all our praises With the purple thistles ; There the jolly lads and lasses Chase me through the waving grasses. In their headlong haste to catch me, Down they thrust their hands to snatch me: Through their fingers slipping, While they grope about to find me, I have left them far behind me, Flying, leaping, skipping. 29 XXIII. My first, 'tis safe to say, is never out ; My second and my third go out in doubt ; My whole some people get put out about. 30 XXIV. Victim of broken vows and cruel malice, Encamped at Troy great Agamemnon lay, While, lighted on the roof -tree of his palace. The Erinnyes howled by night and slept by- day. Even so, my first, we mark thy weird delight, To sleep by day, to rend the air by night. When north-winds blow and winter frosts are biting, My second takes you, forehead, cheek, and chin. Where bar-room fires are cosey and inviting, You take my second at the wayside inn. A paradox, but truth beyond a doubt, My second's hot within and cold without. 31 The high-backed chair, the prim, unbending settle, The sombre clock, " the neatly sanded floor," The purring cat, the softly singing kettle, The bunch of rosemary beside the door, The kitchen with a grateful fragrance filled My whole, a gentle herb, is here distilled. 32 XXV. My first lias weight ; my second, humor. My whole I only know by rumor : Its tastes, they tell me, are aquatic, Its maipers, lively and erratic. 33 XXVI. If you take to swopping horses With a conscience not the worst, You must yield to Satan's forces, And, whatever your remorse is, Give your money to my first. How my second climbs the mast-head ! How he crouches in the box ! How the giants while they lasted Found their machinations blasted By his sanguinary knocks ! Ah, we moderns are but Vandals ! The cothurnus and the soccus And the most becoming sandals Nowadays would only shock us. 34 Once (before the age of Ruskins) When a youth took off his buskins Which distressed him by their tightness, Had your premature politeness Proffered him my whole's assistance, You'd have better kept your distance. 35 XXVII. My First. The forest knows me : with remorseless sting, To flesh of man or beast I fiercely cling. My Second. The scholar knows me : when great Julius fell, With me he hailed the foe that loved him well. My Whole. The traveller knows me : continent and sea Make ready way for him who cleaves to me. 36 XXVIII. I build a castle in the air, Alas ! upon reflection My first is sure to enter there With commonplace objection. As fall my second when a lady fair Unbinds the fillet of her streaming hair, My airy castle falls : no power can stop it ; No architect can find my whole to prop it. 37 XXIX. My First. Wafted from Persian seas by favoring wind, Type of the wealth of Ormus and of Ind ; Or where the Caribbean surges roar, And hurl their foam on old Jamaica's shore ; Borne in the storm -tost bark, the waves I span, To warm and stimulate the inner man. My Second. On Dives' golden table I am found, And ragged Lazarus eats me from the ground : The sure concomitant of human life ; The pride and glory of the farmer's wife ; The food of continents since time began ; The strong support and valued friend of man. My Whole. Delight of children, whose untutored thought As yet no richer nutriment has sought, Though pampered taste thy modest sweets despise, And gourmands view thee with disdain- ful eyes, Fashioned by cunning hands and baked with skill, My whole, " with all thy faults, I love thee still ! " 39 XXX. For Scholars Only. My first and my second in order combined No Roman 'tis singular ever declined. The hero beloved from the south to the north Could be anything else but my third and my fourth. My whole is peculiar, but not too remote For Worcester and Webster and Stormonth to note. 40 XXXI. My First. A gay old boy, I take my joy In dances and carouses. I shun again the haunts of men, And very dear my spouse is. My Second. The golden West in me is dressed ; On fertile plains I flourish : And West and East both man and beast I liberally nourish. \^_ 41 My Whole. To many things Columbia brings A heart of pure affection Her common schools, her army mules, Her doctrine of Protection, Her trotting horse, Elijah Morse, Her flag that rules the sea ; But deeper far the raptures are Her sons have felt for me. 4t> XXXII. My First. The solid continent, the rolling sea, With all their treasures minister to me. My Second. In gayest beauty decked, of haughty mien, I float majestic on the waters green. My Whole. Anthropomorphous cure of human ills, Mine is a lowly home I dwell in pills. 43 XXXIII. My first, if frequently repeated, Implies a speaker self-conceited. Devotion to my third is reckoned A flagrant instance of my second. Would you have the voice of Spurgeon ? Use my whole to keep it mellow. You will find the Russian sturgeon An accommodating fellow : He will give you all the sound Where the substance may be found. 44 XXXIV. When Fortune frowns her very worst, A man of life immaculate Might be excused, if be my first Should now and then ejaculate. My second tumbles on its back And sticks with such tenacity As argues that its mind may lack Superior capacity. Cologne and Araby the Blest, The hut of him we Paddy call, All these are of my whole possessed, With differences radical. 45 XXXV. My First (Astronomical). Behold the monarch of the flock With twisted horn and curling fleece ! I follow him his motion mock A horned enemy of peace. My Second (Sylvan). Where wanderers by the reedy edge Of forest waters idly rove, My voice arises from the sedge And echoes through the shady grove. My Whole (Philosophic). Though men rejoice in budding spring, Or sigh for lovely summer's fall, One voice have I for everything, The loudest croaker of them all. 46 XXXVI Within my first the message of devotion The good ship bears across the stormy ocean. My second breathes of peace, and sweetens labor, Or mingles music with the fife and tabor " Ah ! what a sound will rise how wild and dreary," When iEolus awakes my sleeping whole ! "What loud lament and dismal Miserere " So blasts the ear or blights the aching soul? 47 XXXVII. My first and second lovely woman loathes, A foe alike to peace and health and beauty. In vain she wrings her hands and rends her clothes * She cannot shun inexorable duty. Eat beefsteak raw ; drink Murdock's Liq- uid Food ; Sustain your nerves with " the delicious Ky-Lo,"- You cannot lift my third ; and no man could, From Irish Sullivan to Grecian Milo. * Or " rends her hands and wrings her clothes " at the reader's pleasure. 48 My whole was once a soldier circumspect ; Of word inviolate ; of counsel deepish. His youthful steel was keen ; his form, erect ; His passive countenance, austerely sheep- ish. 49 XXXVIII My First. I set my seal on every food That tickles palates human. My Second. In me and mine the maiden rude Becomes the lovely woman. My Whole. In shout on shout of battle-rout, And shot to shot replying, A cherished friend, I cheer the end Of wounded warriors dying. 50 XXXIX. I cannot sing my first so well As Wordsworth or as Shelley can. My reasons I will frankly tell : 'Tis pretty hard For any bard To praise a bird He never saw or heard. {E.g., I could not celebrate a pelican : I only know it is long-billed and altruistic, And makes with Shelley can a creditable distich.) Nor do I know my second much. Some cavalier more elegant (And truly there are many such) 51 Who rides a horse Without remorse, And will not own That he was ever thrown, Can sound my second's praise as even Shelley can't Lord Marmion, perhaps, who " turned and dashed the rowels ; " Some wight with neither fear nor mercy in his bowels. My whole's a flower of lovely hue, Enough to make a Shelley glad. 'Tis red and blue and purple too, And grows in spikes That everybody likes, And would be perfect if a smell it had. (Perhaps if it were just the merest trifle sweeter, I could write two lines more and satisfy the metre.) 62 XL. My First. Bake ! Bake ! Bake ! On the shining shore of the sea. With never a question of indigestion You gorge yourself with me. My Second. Doubt! Doubt! Doubt! If the tongue and the heart agree, To the mind that hesitates speech neces- sitates Frequent use of me. My Whole. Shout ! Shout ! Shout ! The skipper afloat on the sea, The screaming eagle, the yelping beagle, They vex the heavens with me. 53 XLI. ^AA^ " Go lovely rose," he said, and sighed ; "Alas for human things accurst! Tell her, to tame her beauty's pride, There's not a rose without my first." Hugged in my second's fierce embrace, The stoutest wrestler stands aghast. Horror has blanched his manlv face, The ruthless captor holds him fast. Our fathers called my whole my first, And still the old confusion lingers : Show me the pretty girl that durst Handle my first with gloveless fingers. 54 XLII. In my undivided name I am more than once the same. I am never fairly done ; But I end as I've begun. Men and women, chanting sadly, Shout my first and second madly ; Children follow, though the fact is, Tis a very scaly practice. I am dead a truth unpleasant ; Gone unless in petrifaction, And my double call to action, " Acfc, act, in the living present ! " Search the world, you cannot find me ; I was squatty, not sublime : Yet I may have left behind me u Footprints on the sands of time." 55 XLIIL Without my first, a single day Had brought to grief the one-hoss shay. Peggy and Madge and Margie these My second's sisters, if you please. The years advance ; the moments fly ; The seasons roll among them I. 56 XLIV. The Golden Age. [For Shaksperian students.]. Long, long before great Zeus's birth, When Saturn reigned, and Khea, When Justice tarried on the earth, That prim old girl Astraaa, Those were the golden ages then. Alas, they are my first, and cannot come again ! Of all that's innocent and gay Those ages are symbolic ; For life was then, by night or day, XDne long, continuous frolic. Then were my second never seen, When shepherds piped to maidens trip- ping on the green. 57 Unsown the corn and barley grew In flowery meads delightful ; Unharmed the little songbirds flew ; No living thing was spiteful ; Till the blind god was born above : Then woe to weary wights more than my whole in love ! 58 XLV. My first is, was, and ever will be had Where enterprising man has wit to guess it; My second makes the seasick landsman glad, What though he lack the courage to con- fess it ; My whole on shore is never long at ease, But fain would live a rover of the seas. 59 XLVI. " My first ! " 'Tis Duty whispers low " A stitch in time will save your woe." The gilded youth who hears the word Replies, " My second and my third ! " Better the ragged wretch my whole Than gilded youth with tarnished soul. 60 JFtfeHVi. XLVII. Gkeat Phidias, in the day of Athens' pride, As scholars, chroniclers, and bards have told, Fixed in the warrior maiden's temple wide A glorious form of ivory and gold. Our age, my first, with thee must rest con- tent, Her sole chryselephantine monument. Deep in the hollow bowels of the earth, Where Humphry's light a feeble glim- mer yields And Pluto's dark abodes reveal their worth, The miner's blackened arm my second wields. The startled gnomes in wonder catch the sound, And fly to farthest caverns of the ground. 61 The feast is done ; the creature of a day, My whole, absorbs the thought of every guest. Its transitory yet triumphant sway Freedom of speech has ruthlessly sup- pressed, While man awaits beside the brimming bowl " The feast of reason and the flow of soul." * * Readers who take offence at the picture of society in this stanza will find the subject treated more elegantly in the Appendix. 62 A sable cloak for feathered biped, My first ; my next implies possession. My whole is circular and striped, And subject to acute depression. 63 XLIX. Prone on the grass young Strephon lies, And gazes in his Chloe's eyes, And smooths her rippling hair. "Never was lover half so true As I, sweet girl, have been to you Give me my first, my fair." "Bozzaris with the storied brave," Rests proudly in a hero's grave For bards to glorify. Wider renown my second claims, 11 One of the few, the immortal names, That were not born to die." 64 My whole with cunning skill contrives To save our money and our lives ; Yet Love, whose eyes are dim That disrespectful little elf, Kidiculous enough himself Has always laughed at him. 65 L. My First. Hail, foster-mother of our human race, With ample brow and solemn, melting eye ! Thy graciousness is lovelier than grace ; Pure is the cup of thy benignity. My Second. And when thy feeble offspring trembling- stands, Thy care and love my second part sup- ply Caressing softer far than human hands, To soothe, to freshen, and to beautify. 66 My Whole. Let him who can, explore my hidden cause ; Let him my devious courses turn who can ; Art is but weak to grapple Nature's laws I wave rebellious on the brow of man ! 67 LI. " Oft in the stilly night " When Morpheus fain would try us, We hear my first, a thing accurst, A-coming swiftly nigh us. Some of us swear, but you're aware I do not think it pious ; My conscience says it isn't right To use bad language in the night. Beside the shady stream When, languid, I am lying, Unnumbered legs my second pegs Across my hand how trying ! Some men would shriek, but that is weak (And not so safe as flying). My feeling is that it would seem A timid thing in me to scream. 68 In Gentile or in Jew, In town, or city spacious, My whole you meet in every street- I wouldn't be ungracious. A bow polite will set you right ; You needn't be veracious : / think it doesn't always do To say precisely what is true. 69 APPENDIX. A substitute for Stanza III. of Charade XL VII. * See the brave darling of the gay saloon, In raiment glittering as the sun at noon. His diamond breastpin flashes from afar ; His fingers clasp the Agnes Booth Cigar ; His hvaeinthine locks are black as coal ; His lips are parted, and reveal my whole. * For sucli readers as take offence at the low view of society set forth on p. 62. 70 INDEX OF ANSWERS. 1. HAIR-PIN. XVIII. CAM-ERA. II. IVAN-HOE. XIX. LOHENGRIN. III. DON-KEY. XX. PIP-PIN. IV. ONION. XXI. RIG-MA-ROLE. V. MAN-HAT-TAN. XXII. GRASSHOPPER. VI. ARISING. XXIII. IN-JURY. VII. BLOCK-HEAD. XXIV. CAT-NIP. VIII. OZONE. XXV. GRAM-PUS. IX. SAM-SON. XXVI. BOOT-JACK. X. CATA-COMB. XXVII. TICKET. XI. HAND-SOME. XXVIII. BUT-TR ESSES. XII. BUTTON. XXIX. GINGER-BREAD. XIII. SURF-ACE. XXX. PECU-LIAR. XIV. NIGHT-MARE. XXXI. BUCK-WHEAT. XV. I-O-DINE. XXXII. MAN-DRAKE. XVI. DUMP-LING. XXXIII. ISINGLASS. XVII. PITCHFORK. XXXIV. ODOR. 71 XXXV. BULL-FROG. XXXVI. BAG-PIPE. XXXVII. WASHINGTON. XXXVIII. CAN-TEEN. XXXIX. LARK-SPUR. XL. CLAMOR. XLI. BUG-BEAR. XLII. DO-DO. XLIII. NUT-MEG. XLIV. OVER-SHOES. XLV. HADDOCK. XLVI. MENDICANT. XLVII. TOOTH-PICK. XLVIII. TAR-GET. XLIX. LOCK-SMITH. L. COW-LICK. LI. HUMBUG. 72 TROWS printing and bookbinding company, new'york. THIS BOOK IS DUE ON THE LAST DATE STAMPED BELOW AN INITIAL FINE OF 25 CENTS WILL BE ASSESSED FOR FAILURE TO RETURN THIS BOOK ON THE DATE DUE. THE PENALTY WILL INCREASE TO 50 CENTS ON THE FOURTH DAY AND TO $1.00 ON THE SEVENTH DAY OVERDUE. DEC 191M0M NOV *m JAN 3 1944 UBRAK* USE ^ . : > __ i D. JUL 23 1988 3% , -N JUL 25 $8-4-^