"Ube Savings of poo* 1fticbar&" 
 
 Ube prefaces, proverbs, anfc 
 
 poems of 
 Benjamin franfclln 
 
 in 
 
 poor IRicbarD s Blmanac0 tor 
 1733*1758 
 
 ColtccteB a 
 
 iDaul Uciccster 
 
 , IP. putnam a Sone 
 
 Ube iknicfeerbocfter press 
 
A 
 
 v\ 
 
 A 
 
TO 
 
 LINDSAY SWIFT 
 
 FELLOW-WORKER IN THE VINEYARDS OF 
 FRANKLINIAN LITERATURE 
 
 THIS VOLUME IS 
 
 GRATEFULLY AND AFFECTIONATELY 
 DEDICATED 
 
 M41091 
 
INTRODUCTION. 
 
 AS one handles the little brown pamphlets, 
 so tattered, smoked, and soiled, which 
 constitute so large a proportion of American 
 colonial literature, it needs but small imagina 
 tion to carry one back into the low-ceiled 
 kitchen, with its great broad fire-place, around 
 which the whole family nightly gathered, 
 seated on settles whose high backs but ill shut 
 off the cold drafts that entered at doors, win 
 dows, and the chinks in the logs or clab-boards, 
 their only light the fitful flame of the great 
 fore- and back-logs, eked out perhaps by a pine- 
 knot, or in more pretentious households by a 
 tallow-dip, suspended in its iron holder by a 
 hook in the mantel, the mother and daughters 
 knitting, spinning, or skeining, with an eye on 
 the youngsters ; the sons making or mending 
 their farming tools, or cleaning their rifles and 
 craps ; while the grave and probably rheu- 
 
2 Ifntrofcuction 
 
 matic sire studies the last printed sermon or 
 theological tractate, newspaper, or political 
 squib, " Death-becJ Confession," or "Last Dying 
 Speech," but most probably the weather pre 
 dictions coatain&d ih jfhe most valued of all 
 publications th e A > l*manac/-and no doubt cogi 
 tates and worries over the impending ruin 
 which the unfeeling philomath s prediction of 
 "snow-blast" in July seems to entail upon 
 him. 
 
 Few if any now living can appreciate how 
 large a space this little pamphlet of a dozen 
 leaves filled only one hundred years ago, and 
 this importance increases as we trace it back to 
 its first appearance in this country. To the 
 present generation it is merely a cover for soap, 
 patent medicine, or other quackery advertis 
 ing, but in our colonial period it was the vade 
 mecum of every household a calendar, diary, 
 meteorological bureau, jest-, recipe-, and indeed 
 sometimes school-book ; for, with the exception 
 of the Bible, it was often the year s sole read 
 ing matter in many families, and a poor and 
 shiftless one it was indeed, which, as the new 
 year approached, had not the necessary sum, 
 ranging from a penny to sixpence, to be ex 
 changed for the annual issue. In every well- 
 ordered kitchen a nail was driven in the chim 
 ney-breast, on which, as the old year waned, a 
 
ffntrofcucticm 3 
 
 fresh almanac was hung. How eagerly must 
 all have read it for the first time ! How impor 
 tant were its weather predictions and statistical 
 matter ! How amusing its jokes and anecdotes, 
 which, served up anew year after year, were 
 greeted by no chestnut bell, and never became 
 old or stale. But if the humor was perennial, 
 not so the almanac ! Slowly as the season ad 
 vanced it lost its first youthful freshness, be 
 came brown and thumbed, then ragged, till 
 when the trees commenced to shed their leaves 
 the almanac proved itself no bad imitator, and 
 its successor found no rival to contest its right 
 to the hook. 
 
 If we examine an almanac of the last century, 
 we are struck with the paucity of reading mat 
 ter which sufficed to cause it to be read to pieces. 
 A title-page, which generally served as a table 
 of contents, and was often ornamented with 
 some frightful wood-cut, was usually followed 
 by an "Address to the Courteous Reader." 
 Then came the calendar, each month occupy 
 ing a page, including, among other useful facts, 
 a weather prediction for each day or so, and 
 there was no hedging either. " High Wind," 
 "North west Wind," "Raw and Chilly," "Frost," 
 and " Snow-blast" are set down at random by 
 the philomaths with as much confidence and 
 certainty as if they were reporting yesterday s 
 
4 Ifntrofcucticm 
 
 weather, instead of predicting for six months 
 later. If the calendar failed to fill the page, the 
 matter was eked out by filling in the spaces at 
 the top or bottom with rhymes to the month 
 they chanced to be with, or with short anec 
 dotes, mostly of a comic nature. If any pages 
 were left over from the calendar, they were 
 filled with extracts from books, by information 
 concerning the courts, the post-roads, facts in 
 history, or all combined. 
 
 We should hardly think the compiling of 
 such a work would entitle one to a high place 
 in the world of literature, but in "the good old 
 days of yore," a different value was set on 
 these productions, and so we find such time- 
 honored names as Chauncy, Sewall, Danforth, 
 Mather, and Dudley figuring on the title-page 
 as the compiler, or, as they were then almost 
 invariably styled, as the "philomath," or lover 
 of learning. To their readers, who still be 
 lieved in witchcraft, governing stars, and horo 
 scopes, the composition of an almanac savored 
 of magic, sorcery, if not illicit communion with 
 departed spirits, and the authors were there 
 fore to them most awe-inspiring beings ; and 
 probably the guild was not above adding to this 
 belief, as is shadowed in a poem of Philip Fre- 
 neau, written in the last century when the " art " 
 was first beginning to show signs of decay : 
 
Ifntrofcuctfon 
 
 While others dwell on mean affairs, 
 
 Their Kings, their councils, and their Wars, 
 
 Philaster roves among the stars. 
 
 In melancholy silence he 
 Travels alone and cannot see 
 An equal for his company. 
 
 He tells us when the sun will rise 
 Points out fair days, or clouded skies ; 
 No matter if he sometimes lies. 
 
 An annual Almanac to frame 
 And publish with pretended name 
 Is all his labour, all his aim. 
 
 Thus nature waiting at his call, 
 
 His book, in vogue with great and small, 
 
 Is sought, admir d, and read by all. 
 
 How happy thus on earth to stay 
 The planets keeping him in pay 
 And when t is time to post away 
 
 Old Saturn will the bait prepare, 
 And hook him up from toil and care 
 To make new calculations there. 
 
 But if the almanac and its compiler were of 
 great importance to the public, they were 
 equally so to the printer. Knjoying such a 
 popularity, the sales of the little pamphlet were 
 almost the only certain financial venture of the 
 year, and lucky was the printer who had se 
 cured the copy of a well-known and esteemed 
 
6 -ffntrofcuctfon 
 
 philomath. To-day the bulk of these seem to 
 differ little in accuracy or interest, but in the 
 times when these were bought and read there 
 were fashions and fads in almanacs, and while 
 some nourished and brought money to both 
 compiler and printer, others dragged along for 
 a few years and finally disappeared. 
 
 Perhaps nothing better illustrates the place 
 once held in American literature by these 
 ephemera than the annals of American print 
 ing. A collection of the first issues of the early 
 American presses established in the various 
 towns would, with hardly an exception, con 
 sist of these little waifs. When, over two hun 
 dred and fifty years ago, Stephen Daye set up 
 the first printing-office in this country, the first 
 volume he printed was the almanac of "Wil 
 liam Peirce, Mariner." When William Brad 
 ford, "after great Charge and Trouble," had 
 "brought the great Art and Mystery of Print 
 ing " into the city of Philadelphia, Samuel 
 Atkin s " Kalendarium Pennsilvaniense " was 
 the first issue of his press. When the year s 
 product of the three Philadelphia presses num 
 bered but thirteen books, seven were almanacs, 
 and the two of the six issues of the New York 
 presses for this same year were of this character. 
 
 Such was the status of the almanac when, 
 in the "first year of the reign of our well-be- 
 
lintro&uctfon 7 
 
 loved king, George II." and " of our Lord 1728," 
 the youthful firm of " B. Franklin and H. 
 Meredith" set up the "New Printing Office 
 near the Market. " However small and humble 
 the new venture opened, it had to have an al 
 manac, and so the annual copy was engaged 
 from Thomas Godfrey, a Philadelphia scientist 
 of no mean note in those days, and contem 
 porary inventor with Hadley of the quadrant. 
 For three years they published this with ap 
 parent satisfaction to all concerned, when a 
 match-making woman, in the person of Mrs. 
 Godfrey, enacted the Discordia, and introduced 
 the fatal apple. Franklin had rented the upper 
 part of his shop to the Godfreys, boarding with 
 them, and being of the weaker sex, Mrs. God 
 frey naturally planned a match between the 
 seemingly prosperous young printer and a 
 marriageable relation. She made " opportuni 
 ties of bringing us often together, till a serious 
 courtship on my part ensu d, the girl being in 
 herself very deserving. The old folks encour 
 aged me by continual invitations to supper, and 
 by leaving us alone together, till at length it 
 was time to explain." The prudent printer, 
 who in his almanac afterwards advised one to 
 " ne er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a 
 fire) to put her in," "let her know that I [he] 
 expected as much money with their daughter 
 
8 Untrofcuctfon 
 
 as would pay off my remaiiiing debt for the 
 printing house, which I believe was not then 
 above a hundred pounds. She brought me 
 word they had no such sum to spare ; I said 
 they might mortgage their house in the loan- 
 office. The answer to this, after some days, was, 
 that they did not approve . . . and, there 
 fore, I was forbidden the house, and the daugh 
 ter shut up. . . . Mrs. Godfrey brought me 
 afterward some more favorable accounts of 
 their disposition, and would have drawn me on 
 again ; but I declared absolutely my resolution 
 to have nothing more to do with that family. 
 This was resented by the Godfreys ; we differed, 
 and they removed." 
 
 Neither the loss of his lady-love nor tenants 
 seem seriously to have inconvenienced the 
 philosophic young printer, but one result of 
 this courtship involved graver consequences to 
 him. The Godfreys not merely ceased to be his 
 tenants, but the philomath carried his yearly 
 calculations to Andrew Bradford, Franklin s 
 rival in the printing business, and near the 
 end of the year 1732 the latter found himself in 
 the lurch for the copy for his annual issue. 
 
 With the natural adaptability of the born 
 Yankee, Franklin met this difficulty by com 
 piling his own almanac. Knowing, however, 
 that the name of "B. Franklin, printer," could 
 
ITntro&uction 9 
 
 hardly pass for a man of sufficient years and 
 learning to be one of the philomathic brother 
 hood, he borrowed as a pen-name that of " Rich 
 ard Saunders," the origir-1 of which belonged 
 to an English "Chyrurgeon" of the eighteenth 
 century, who for many years compiled a popu 
 lar almanac entitled " The Apollo Anglicanus," 
 which attained such a reputation that it was 
 still published as late as 1781, though now quite 
 forgot for its better-known western imitator. 
 From another eighteenth-century English al 
 manac entitled " Poor Robin," was probably de 
 rived the title of " Poor Richard," which so 
 hit popular fancy ; and under these borrowed 
 plumes the almanac appeared. 
 
 The yearly issue was usually published as 
 early as October of the preceding year, but the 
 first intimation the city of brotherly love had 
 of the new venture was, from the causes already 
 mentioned, derived from the columns of The 
 Pennsylvania Gazette of December 19, 1732, 
 and was as follows : 
 
 " Just Published, for 1733 : 
 
 POOR RICHARD : An ALMANACK containing the 
 Lunations, Eclipses, Planets Motions and Aspects, 
 Weather, Sun and Moon s rising and setting, High- 
 water, &c. besides many pleasant and witty Verses, 
 Jests and Sayings, Author s Motive of Writing, Predic 
 tion of the Death of his Friend Mr. Titan I,eeds, Moon no 
 Cuckold, Batchelor s Folly, Parson s Wine and Baker s 
 Pudding, Short Visits, Kings and Bears, New Fashions, 
 
io 1lntromctton 
 
 Game for Kisses, Katherine s Love, Different Senti 
 ments, Signs of a Tempest, Death a Fisherman, Con 
 jugal Debate, Men and Melons, H. the Prodigal, 
 Breakfast i i Bed, Oyster Lawsuit, &c. By RICHARD 
 SAUNDERS, Philomat. Printed and sold by B. Frank 
 lin, Price v- f>d. per Dozen. Of whom also may be had 
 Sheet Almanacks at 2S. 6d." 
 
 It was not the custom of the time to advertise 
 to any extent. Most publishers of almanacs 
 thought they had done enough for their own 
 and the public s benefit when they had 
 announced through the press that "On Mon 
 day next will be published, L/eeds Almanack 
 
 for " or "Now selling by the printer Jer- 
 
 man s Almanack for ." It is easy to believe 
 
 then that this advertisement was of a nature to 
 attract notice, and make the public buy the 
 new almanac. Indeed it is the only explana 
 tion I have found for the almost instantaneous 
 large sale it met with. And sell it did only a 
 trifle over two weeks after its first publication, 
 and in spite of the prejudicial fact that " A few 
 of the first that were printed had the Months of 
 September and October transposed," Franklin 
 announced in The Pennsylvania Gazette of Jan 
 uary 4, 1733, that on " Saturday next will be 
 published for 1733 : The Second Edition of Poor 
 Richard" ; and but a week later through the 
 same medium he advertised the publication of 
 a "Third Impression." Having discovered the 
 efficacy of advertising, Franklin was not back- 
 
ffntrofcuction n 
 
 ward in using it for the next issue. In his 
 paper as early as November 8, 1733, the public 
 eye was informed, with nearly a whole column, 
 as below : 
 
 Just publish d for 1734. 
 
 POOR RICHARD : An ALMANACK containing the 
 Lunations, Eclipses, Planets Motions and Aspect^ 
 Weather, Sun and Moon s Rising and Setting, High- 
 water, &c. Besides many Pleasant and Witty Verses, 
 Tests and Notable Sayings. Thanks to the Publick for 
 his last Year s Encouragement. Of His Wife s good 
 Humour. Of His Prediction concerning the Day, Hour, 
 and Minute of Titan Leeds s Death. Mr. Leeds s Char- 
 acter. Remarks upon the Almanack published for 1734 
 in Leeds s Name. Gelding Time. Good Women, Stars 
 and Angels. Poor Dick s Litany. What Death is. What 
 spoils the Teeth. The Travellers Improvement. Blind 
 Fortune. Wedlock Lawyers, Preachers and Tomtit s 
 Eggs. Robin bit. How to perswade. Lawyer s Will, 
 
 Bucephalus and his Master. Crowing Hen. .S / the 
 
 Smith , and /- b the Tapster. The Teacher. Heirs 
 
 and Widows. John s Wit. The Dutch Maxim. Verses 
 
 by Mrs. Bridget Saunders, in Answer to the December 
 
 Verses of last Year. Short Dialogue between a Lawyer 
 
 and his Client, &c. By Rickard Saunders Philom. 
 
 Philadelphia, Printed and sold by B. Franklin, Price 
 
 3-y. 6d. per Doz. 
 
 To all, whom it may concern to know R. S. 
 
 I m not High-Church, nor Low-Church, nor Tory, nor 
 
 Whig, 
 
 No flat? ring young Coxcomb, nor formal old Prig ; 
 Not eternally talking nor silently queint, 
 No profligate sinner, nor pragmatical Saint, 
 7 m not vain of my Judgment, nor ptnn d on a Sleeve, 
 Nor implicitly any Thing can [believe. 
 To sift Truth from all Rubbish, I do what I can, 
 And, God knows, If I err / m a fallible man. 
 I can laugh at a Jest, if not crack d out of Time, 
 And excuse a Mistake, tho not flatter a Crime. 
 Any faults of my Friends fwou d scorn to expose, 
 And detest private Scandal, tho 1 cast on my Foes. 
 I put none to the Blush, on whatever Pretence, 
 For immodesty shocks both good Breeding and Sense, 
 No Man s Person I hate, tho 1 his Conduct I blame, 
 
i2 Introduction 
 
 I can censure a Vice, without stabbing a Name. 
 
 To amend not Reproach is the Bent of my Mind, 
 
 A Reproof is half lost, wh?n ill Nature is joined. 
 
 Where Merit appears, tho in Rags, I respect it, 
 
 And plead Virtue s Cause, shou d the whole World reject it. 
 
 Cool Reason I bow to, wheresoever t is found, 
 
 And rejoice when sound learning with Favour is crown d. 
 
 To no Party a Slave, in no squabbles I join, 
 
 Nor damn the Opinion, that differs from mine. 
 
 Evil tongues I contemn, no Blasphemies I sing ; 
 
 I dote on my Country and am Liege to my King. 
 
 Tho length of Days I desire, yet with my last Breath, 
 
 I m in hopes to betrav no mean dreading s of Death : 
 
 And as to the Path, after Death to be trod, 
 
 I rely on the Will of a MERCIFUL GOD. 
 
 R. SAUNDERS. 
 
 Another cause for the large sale of the early 
 issues was without question due to the con 
 troversies with his brother philomaths, which 
 Franklin originated by his jocose remarks upon 
 them in the prefaces of Poor Richard. With 
 delicious humor aud satire, Mr. Saunders in 
 different issues gravely predicts the death of 
 one of his rivals, Titan Leeds, and the recon 
 ciliation of a second, John Jerman, to the 
 Catholic Church. Neither of these gentlemen, 
 though able to predict weather twelve months 
 in advance, could draw from the stars Frank 
 lin s purpose, and so they fell into his trap, and 
 in the prefaces to their respective issues they 
 replied to him with anger and "strong " words. 
 Leeds called him a " Fool and a Lyar" and "a 
 conceited scribbler," which Jerman echoed in 
 no minor key by stating that Franklin s predic- 
 
ffntrotwctton 13 
 
 tion was " altogether false and untrue," and 
 that he was "one of Baal s false prophets." 
 This was just what Franklin expected, and he 
 used his opportunity to the utmost. With wit 
 and humor he fanned the flame of controversy, 
 to which his rivals replied with bad language 
 and adjectives. He made every reader of Leeds 
 and Jerman hear of and wish to see Poor Rich 
 ard, and, once seen, it was a very clod-pate who 
 could not discriminate between texts, one of 
 which has been translated into a dozen lan 
 guages, while the other has barely survived 
 on the shelves of the antiquary. 
 
 But if this unusual advertising created a large 
 sale of the early issues, its continuous success 
 was due to a third cause. In his Autobiography 
 Franklin tells us that " observing it was gener 
 ally read, scarce any neighborhood in the prov 
 ince being without it, I consider d it as a proper 
 vehicle for conveying instruction among the 
 common people, who bought scarcely any other 
 books ; I therefore filled all the little spaces 
 between the remarkable days in the calendar 
 with proverbial sentences, chiefly such as in 
 culcated industry and frugality as the means of 
 procuring wealth, and thereby securing virtue ; 
 it being more difficult for a man in want to act 
 always honestly, as, to use here one of these 
 proverbs, it is hard for an empty sack to stand 
 
i4 Untrofcuction 
 
 upright" It is these proverbs which made 
 Poor Richard the popular almanac of the 
 period. The religious schisms, the privations 
 of emigration, and the hard and dreary colonial 
 life had tinged our forefathers with a serious 
 ness that produced practically no humor, and 
 the wise and witty sayings of Poor Richard 
 stand out as almost the sole production of this 
 kind in our colonial period. Certainly, though 
 written for the common people, they are the 
 only ones worth reading to-day, and it is not 
 strange that what, in a garbled and abbreviated 
 form, has achieved such a reputation, that to 
 day it is as well known in Europe as in America, 
 and which is still constantly reprinted, should 
 in the colorless life of our frontier settlements 
 have enjoyed a popularity sufficient to keep the 
 presses busy printing the ten thousand copies 
 annually needed to supply the readers, who 
 extended as far north as Rhode Island, and 
 to the southward as far as the Carolinas. In 
 deed it is, so far as I am aware, the first literary 
 production of this country which to any extent 
 broke through the colony boundaries which at 
 that time so thoroughly localized thought and 
 people. 
 
 It is hardly necessary to state that Franklin 
 did not originate all the " Sayings of Poor 
 Richard." He himself tells us that they were 
 
Unttofcuctfon 15 
 
 " the wisdom of many ages and nations." Any 
 one familiar with Bacon, Rochefoucauld, and 
 Rabelais, as well as others, will recognize old 
 friends in some of these sayings, while a study 
 of the collections of Proverbs, made in the 
 early part of the last century by Ray and 
 Palmer, will reveal the probable source from 
 which Poor Richard pilfered. Yet with but 
 few exceptions these maxims and aphorisms 
 had been filtered through Franklin s brain, and 
 were tinged with that mother wit which so 
 strongly and individually marks so much that 
 he said and wrote. 
 
 But for these exceptions, Poor Richard was 
 like all his contemporaries. Here was the same 
 comparatively poor printing, the same great 
 economy of paper, not merely in margins, but in 
 printing on every available blank which oc 
 curred. Here are anecdotes and poems so 
 coarse that only a knowledge of eighteenth- 
 century literature can save one from marvelling 
 that the sheets containing them could gain 
 admission into a decent household. But to the 
 age that read Swift, Richardson, and Smollett, 
 t was no shame to read Poor Richard, and his 
 coarseness at least was tinctured with genuine 
 wit, and not merely coarse for coarseness sake. 
 Here are the same dry though then important 
 facts and tables concerning the sessions of the 
 
16 Untrofcuction 
 
 different courts, post-roads, mails, and friends 
 meetings. Here are the occasional " Tables of 
 Interest at Six per Cent," "Table of Coins," 
 " Historical Chronology," " Act of Parliament," 
 "Method of Inoculating for the Small Pox," 
 " Receipt for making Dauphiny Soup, which in 
 Turkey is call Touble," and other matter of 
 such "gone-nothingness" as not to be worth 
 reprinting. And here are the doggerel rhymes 
 which are bad enough to merit notice. 
 
 In his Autobiography, Franklin tells us that 
 by the saving ridicule of his father he " escaped 
 being a poet and most probably a bad one." 
 Certainly the poems of Poor Richard support 
 the truth of the latter part of this statement, if 
 not the former. It is true that Mr. Saunders 
 tells us in one of his prefaces that " I need not 
 tell thee that many of them [the verses] are of 
 my own Making. If thou hast any Judgement 
 in Poetry, thou wilt easily discern the Work 
 man from the Bungler. I know as well as thee, 
 that I am no Poet born and it is a Trade I never 
 learnt, nor indeed could learn. If I make 
 Verses, t is in Spight Of Nature and my Stars 
 I write. Why then should I give my Readers 
 bad Lines of my own, when good Ones of other 
 Peoples are so plentiful ? " Perhaps then Poor 
 Richard should not be made responsible for all 
 these poems, but I have been able to identify 
 
flntrofcuctfon 17 
 
 but one or two pieces as from other pens, and 
 suspect that they must most of them be referred 
 to one which had so little poetic feeling that it 
 could write of it as a " trade " to be "learnt." 
 
 Such was the almanac which made Richard 
 Saunders, yclept Poor Richard, a distinct indi 
 vidual to our colonial ancestors and gained him 
 a reputation possessed by few even of our then 
 governors and leading men. In 1746, by the 
 death of that " Ornament and Head of our Pro 
 fession, Mr. Jacob Taylor, who for upwards of 
 forty years (with some few Intermissions only) 
 supply d the good people of this and the neigh 
 boring Colonies with the most accurate Calcu 
 lations that have hitherto appear d in America " 
 (and who indeed was said to have assisted in the 
 preparation of Poor Richard), the most serious 
 rival of this latter was removed. This made an 
 opening Franklin was too shrewd not to seize, 
 and he announced that " since my Friend 
 Taylor is no more, whose Ephemerides so long 
 and agreeably serv d and entertained these 
 Provinces, I have taken the liberty to imitate 
 his well-known Method, of giving two pages to 
 each Month," and accordingly the title-page of 
 the issue for 1748, was not only termed " Poor 
 Richard Improved " (under which title it was 
 subsequently printed), but announced to the 
 public that " This Almanack us d to contain but 
 
i8 flntrofcuctfon 
 
 24 Pages, and now has 36 ; yet the Price is very 
 little advanc d." The almanac throve under its 
 new form, and such was the edition printed of 
 the issue for 1750, that Franklin sent a copy to 
 his "Honored Mother," as early as October 
 i6th of the preceding year, with the statement 
 that "we print them early, because we send 
 them to many places far distant." By Frank 
 lin s accounts we know that in the last fourteen 
 years in which he was connected with the 
 almanac, the total sales were 141,257 copies, 
 amounting in the colonial currency to the sum 
 of ^2213. o. 8. 
 
 For twenty-five years Franklin compiled and 
 printed this almanac, (though it was continued 
 till near the end of the last century), and in the 
 last issue edited by him, being for the year 1758, 
 he contributed a preface to which almost the 
 entire knowledge of Poor Richard by the world 
 is due. It was in effect a skimming of the 
 cream from the twenty-four previous issues, 
 being a selection of aphorisims, rhymes, and 
 jokes run into a continuous piece, which was 
 described by Franklin as follows: "These 
 proverbs. . . I assembled and form d into a con 
 nected discourse prefix d to the Almanack of 
 1757 [sic] as the harangue of a wise old man to 
 the people attending an auction. The bringing 
 all these scatter d counsels thus into a focus, 
 
"ffntro&uction 13 
 
 enabled them to make greater impression. The 
 piece, being universally approved, was copied 
 in all the newspapers of the Continent ; re 
 printed in Britain on a broadside, to be stuck up 
 in houses; two translations were made of it 
 in French, and great numbers bought by the 
 clergy and gentry, to distribute gratis among 
 their poor parishioners and tenants." 
 
 It is this preface which has given the name 
 of Poor Richard currency in alien races and a 
 quotable quality to this day. It has been 
 printed and reprinted again and again. In 
 every size, from a " pot duodecimo" up to " im 
 perial folio " ; in thousands for the plow-boy, 
 and in limited and privately printed editions at 
 the expense of noblemen ; for the "penny- 
 horrible" hawker, and for the bibliomaniac; 
 for the Society for Preserving Property against 
 Republicans and Levellers, " and for the " Asso 
 ciation for Improving the Condition of the 
 Poor " ; and under the titles of " Father Abra 
 ham s Speech," "The Way to Wealth," and 
 "La Science du Bonhomme Richard," it has 
 proved itself one of the most popular American 
 writings. Seventy editions of it have been 
 printed in English, fifty-six in French, eleven 
 in German, and nine in Italian. It has been 
 translated into Spanish, Danish, Swedish, 
 Welsh, Polish, Gaelic, Russian, Bohemian, 
 
20 Untro&uctton 
 
 Dutch, Catalan, Chinese, Modern Greek, and 
 Phonetic writing. It has been printed at least 
 four hundred times, and is to-day as popular as 
 ever. 
 
 But for this re-hash, the rarity of the original 
 issues would have caused Richard Saunders and 
 his almanacs to be quite unknown. The few 
 remaining copies of the original publications 
 are bibliographical rarities which are eagerly 
 sought for and command prices which are pro 
 hibitive to the ordinary reader. Of the two 
 hundred thousand copies which a low estimate 
 gives as the number printed while Franklin 
 wrote the almanac, but a mere fraction are left 
 us. After a search extending over several 
 years, the editor can represent the entire num 
 ber known to him with two units, and an 
 examination of these would entail visits to New 
 York, Philadelphia, and Washington a task 
 hitherto undertaken by no editor of Franklin. 
 
 Yet these originals do not deserve the fate 
 that has been awarded to so much of our colo- 
 nial literature. No p u ^cation which had a 
 great popularity at any period of the world s 
 history deserves entire forgetfulness. If only 
 classed with the archaeology of literature, they 
 should still be read and remembered, so that we 
 may better appreciate the thoughts, feelings, 
 and interests of our bv-gone generations. But 
 
ITntro&uctton 21 
 
 the editor believes that Poor Richard has higher 
 claims to public notice than for this reason. To 
 collect and edit these pieces, so as for the first 
 time to give them to the public in a form and 
 dress that will permit of reading, has been 
 to him a labor of love. Beyond the monthly 
 calendars he has pruned as little as the nature 
 of this reprint and the space at his command 
 would allow of. Little which he believes 
 Franklin wrote has been omitted, and so 
 perhaps some of the volume may seem of but 
 slight interest. If so, merely consider them as 
 foils to the other parts, and blame not the Poor 
 Richard who wrote : 
 
 " Bad commentators spoil the best of books, 
 So God sends meat (they say) the Devil Cooks " 
 
 PAUL LEICESTER FORIX 
 
 BROOKLYN, N. Y., 
 Dec. 161889. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1733. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 I might in this place attempt to gain thy 
 favour by declaring that I write Almanacks 
 with no other view than that of the publick 
 good, but in this I should not be sincere ; and 
 men are now a-days too wise to be deceiv d by 
 pretences, how specious soever. The plain 
 truth of the matter is, I am excessive poor, and 
 my wife, good woman, is, I tell her, excessive 
 proud ; she cannot bear, she says, to sit spinning 
 in her shift of tow, while I do nothing but gaze 
 at the stars ; and has threatned more than once 
 to burn all my books and rattling-traps, (as she 
 calls my instruments,) if I do not make some 
 profitable use of them for the good of my family. 
 The Drinter hat. offer d me some considerable 
 23 
 
24 poor IRicbaro for 1733 
 
 share of the profits, and I have thus began to 
 comply with my dame s desire. 
 
 Indeed, this motive would have had force 
 enough to have made me publish an Almanack 
 many years since, had it not been overpowered 
 by my regard for my good friend and fellow- 
 stuclent, Mr. Titan Leeds, whose interest I was 
 extreamly unwilling to hurt. But this obstacle 
 (I am far from speaking it with pleasure,) is 
 soon to be removed, since inexorable death, who 
 was never known to respect merit, has already 
 prepared the mortal dart, the fatal sister has 
 already extended her destroying shears, and 
 that ingenious man must soon be taken from 
 us. He dies, by my calculation, made at his 
 request, on Oct. 17, 1733, 3 ho., 29 m., P.M., at 
 the very instant of the 6 of and g . By his 
 own calculation he will survive till the 26th of 
 the same month. This small difference between 
 us we have disputed whenever we have met 
 these nine years past ; but at length he is in 
 clinable to agree with my judgment. Which 
 of us is most exact, a little time will now deter 
 mine. As, therefore, these Provinces may not 
 longer expect to see any of his performances 
 after this year, I think myself free to take up 
 the task, and request a share of publick encour* 
 agement, which I am the more apt to hope for 
 on this account, that the buyer of my Almanack 
 
Ipoor IRlcbarfc for 1733 25 
 
 may consider himself not only as purchasing an 
 useful utensil, but as performing an act of 
 charity to his poor 
 
 Friend and servant, 
 
 R. SAUNDERS.* 
 
 Saturn diseas d with age, and left for dead ; 
 Chang d all his gold to be involv d in lead. 
 
 2L Jove, Juno leaves, and loves to take his range ; 
 From whom man learns to love, and loves to change. 
 
 $ is disarmed, and to 5 gone, 
 Where Vulcan s anvil must be struck upon. 
 That J) I/una s horn d, it cannot well be said, 
 Since I ne er heard that she was married. 
 
 * Titan I,eeds, in his " American Almanack " for 1734, 
 thus replies : 
 
 "Kind Reader, Perhaps it may be expected that 1 
 should say something concerning an Almanack printed 
 for the Year 1733, Said to be writ by Poor Richard or 
 Richard Saunders, who for want of other matter was 
 pleased to tell his Readers, that he had calculated my 
 Nativity, and from thence predicts my Death to be the 
 iyth of October, 1733. At 22 min. past 3 a-Clock in the Af 
 ternoon, and that these Provinces may not expect to see 
 any more of his {Titan Leeds) Performances, and this 
 precise Predicter, who predicts to a Minute, proposes to 
 succeed me in Writing of Almanacks ; but notwithstand 
 ing his false Prediction, I have by the Mercy of God 
 lived to write a Diary for the Year 1734, and to publish 
 the Folly and Ignorance of this presumptuous Author. 
 Nay, he adds another gross Falsehood in his said Alman 
 ack, viz That by my own Calculation, I shall survive until 
 the z6th of the said Month, (October) which is as untrue 
 as the former, for I do not pretend to that Knowledge, 
 altho he has usurpt the Knowledge of the Almighty 
 herein, and manifested himself a Fool and a I^yar. And 
 by the mercy of God I have lived to survive this conceited 
 Scriblers Day and Minute whereon he has predicted 
 my Death ; and as I have supplyed my Country with 
 Almanacks for three seven Years by past, to general 
 Satisfaction, so perhaps I may live to write when his 
 Performances are Dead. Thus much from your annual 
 Friend, Titan Leeds. October 18, 1733, 3. ho. 33 min, P.M." 
 
26 poor IRfcbaro for 1733 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 More nice than wise. 
 
 Old batchelor would have a wife that s wise, 
 Fair, rich, and young, a maiden for his bed ; 
 Not proud, nor churlish, but of faultless size, 
 A country houswife in the city bred. 
 
 He s a nice fool, and long in vain hath staid ; 
 He should bespeak her, there s none ready made 
 
 Never spare the parson s wine, nor the baker s pud 
 ding. 
 
 Visits should be short, like a winter s day, 
 I/est you re too troublesome, hasten away. 
 
 A house without woman and firelight, is like a body 
 without soul or sprite. 
 
 Kings and bears often worry their keepers. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 N. N. of B s county, pray don t be angry with poor 
 
 Richard. 
 
 Ijach age of men new fashions doth invent ; 
 
 Things which are old, young men do not esteem : 
 What pleas d our fathers, doth not us content ; 
 What flourished then, we out of fashion deem : 
 And that s the reason, as I understand, 
 Why Prodigus did sell his father s land. 
 
 lyight purse, heavy heart. 
 
 He s a fool that makes his doctor his heir. 
 
 Ne er take a wife till thou hast a house (and a fire) to 
 put her in. 
 
jpoor IRicbarD for 1733 27 
 
 He s gone, and forgot nothing but to say farewell to 
 his creditors. 
 
 I/ove well, whip well. 
 
 My love and I for kisses play d, 
 
 She would keep stakes, I was content, 
 But when 1 won, she would be paid, 
 This made me ask her what she meant : 
 Quoth she, since you are in this wrangling vein 
 Here take your kisses, give me mine again. 
 
 I^et my respected friend J. G. 
 
 Accept this humble verse of me, 
 
 Viz : Ingenious, learned, envy d youth, 
 
 Go on as thou st began ; 
 
 Even thy enemies take pride, 
 
 That thou rt their countryman. 
 
 Hunger never saw bad bread. 
 
 Kind Katherine to her husband kiss d these words ; 
 " Mine own sweet Will, how dearly I love thee ! " 
 If true (quoth Will) the world no such affords. 
 And that its true I durst his warrant be : 
 For ne er heard I of woman good or ill, 
 But always loved best, her own sweet Will. 
 
 Great talkers, little doers. 
 
 A rich rogue is like a fat hog, who never does good till 
 is dead as a log. 
 
28 poor IRtcbarfc for 1733 
 
 Relation without friendship, friendship without power 
 power without will, will without effect, effect without 
 profit, and profit without virtue, are not worth a 
 f * * * *. 
 
 MAY. 
 
 Mirth pleaseth some, to others t is offence, 
 
 Some commend plain conceit, some profound sense ; 
 
 Some wish a witty jest, some dislike that, 
 
 And most would have themselves they know not what. 
 
 Then he that would please all, and himself too, 
 
 Takes more in hand than he is like to do. 
 
 The favour of the great is no inheritance. 
 Fools make feasts, and wise men eat them. 
 Beware of the young doctor and the old barber. 
 He has chang d his one ey d horse for a blind one. 
 The poor have little, beggars none ; the rich too muchj 
 enough, not one. 
 Eat to live, and not live to eat. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 " Observe the daily circle of the sun, 
 And the short year of each revolving moon : 
 By them thou shalt foresee the following day, 
 Nor shall a starry night thy hopes betray. 
 When first the moon appears, if then she shrouds 
 Her silver crescent, tip d with sable clouds, 
 Conclude she bodes a tempest on the main, 
 And brews for fields impetuous floods of rain." 
 
 After three days men grow weary of a wench, a guest, 
 and weather rainy. 
 To lengthen thy life, lessen thy meals. 
 
poor Ifticbarfc for 1733 29 
 
 The proof of gold is fire ; the proof of woman, gold ; 
 the proof of man, a woman. 
 After feasts made, the maker scratches his head. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 " Ev n while the reaper fills his greedy hands, 
 And binds the golden sheafs in brittle bands, 
 Oft have I seen a sudden storm arise 
 From all the warring winds that sweep the skies : 
 And oft whole sheets descend of slucy rain, 
 Suck d by the spungy clouds from off the main ; 
 The lofty skies at once come pouring down, 
 The promis d crop and golden labors drown." 
 
 Many estates are spent in the getting, 
 
 Since women for tea forsook spinning and knitting. 
 
 He that lieth down with dogs, shall rise up with fleas. 
 
 A fat kitchen, a lean will. 
 
 Distrust and caution are the parents of security. 
 
 Tongue double, brings trouble. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 " For us thro twelve bright signs Apollo guides 
 The year, and earth in sev ral climes divides. 
 Five girdles bind the skies, the torrid zone 
 Glows with the passing and repassing sun. 
 Far on the right and left, th extreams of heav n, 
 To frosts, and snows, and bitter blasts are giv n. 
 Betwixt the midst and these, the gods assign d 
 Two habitable seats for humane kind." 
 
 Take counsel in wine, but resolve afterwards in water 
 
 He that drinks fast, pays slow. 
 
 Great famine when wolves eat wolves. 
 
30 ipoor fRicbarfc for 1733 
 
 A good wife lost, is God s gift lost. 
 
 A taught horse, and a woman to teach, and teachers 
 practising what they preach. 
 He is ill clothed that is bare of virtue. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 Death is a fisherman, the world we see 
 His fish-pond is, and we the fishes be ; 
 His net some general sickness ; howe er he 
 Is not so kind as other fishers be ; 
 For if they take one of the smaller fry, 
 They throw him in again, he shall not die : 
 But death is sure to kill all he can get, 
 And all is fish with him that conies to net. 
 
 Men and melons are hard to know. 
 
 He s the best physician that knows the worthlessness 
 of the most medicines. 
 
 Beware of meat twice boil d, and an old foe reconcil d. 
 
 A fine genius in his own country, is like gold in the 
 mine. 
 
 There is no little enemy. 
 
 The heart of the fool is in his mouth, but the mouth 
 of the wise man is in his heart. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 Time was my spouse and I could not agree, 
 Striving about superiority : 
 
 The text which saith that man and wife are one, 
 Was the chief argument we stood upon : . 
 She held, they both one woman should become ; 
 I held they should be man, and both but one. 
 Thus we contended daily, but the strife 
 Could not be ended, till both were one wife. 
 
fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1733 31 
 
 The old man has given all to his son. 
 
 O fool ! to undress thy self before thou art going to 
 bed. 
 
 Cheese and salt meat should be sparingly eat. 
 
 Doors and walls are fools paper. 
 
 Anoint a villain and he 11 stab you, stab him, and he 11 
 anoint you. 
 
 Keep your mouth wet, feet dry. 
 
 He has lost his boots, but sav d his spurs. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 My neighbour H y by his pleasing tongue, 
 
 Hath won a girl that s rich, wise, fair, and young ; 
 
 The match (he saith) is half concluded, he 
 
 Indeed is wondrous willing ; but not she, 
 
 And reason good, for he has run thro all 
 
 Almost the story of the prodigal ; 
 
 Yet swears he never with the hogs did dine ; 
 
 That s true, for none would trust him with their swine. 
 
 Where bread is wanting, all s to be sold. 
 There is neither honour nor gain got in dealing with 
 a vil-lain. 
 
 The fool hath made a vow, I guess, 
 Never to let the fire have peace. 
 Snowy winter, a plentiful- harvest. 
 Nothing more like a fool, than a drunken man. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 She that will eat her breakfast in her bed, 
 And spend the morn in dressing of her head, 
 And sit at dinner like a maiden bride, 
 
2 poor IRfcbarD for 
 
 And talk of nothing all day but of pride ; 
 God in his mercy may do much to save her, 
 But what a case is he in that shall have her. 
 
 God works wonders now and then ; 
 
 Behold ! a lawyer, an honest man. 
 
 He that lives carnally, won t live eternally. 
 
 Innocence is its own defence. 
 
 Time eateth all things, could old poets say, 
 
 The times are chang d, our times drink all away c 
 
 Never mind it, she 1 be sober after the holidays. 
 
 THE BENEFIT OF GOING TO LAW. 
 Dedicated to the Countess of K t and H-n-r-d-n. 
 
 Two beggars travelling along, 
 
 One blind, the other lame. 
 Pick d up an oyster on the way, 
 
 To which they both laid claim : 
 The matter rose so high, that they 
 
 Resolv d to go to law, 
 As often richer fools have done, 
 
 Who quarrel for a straw. 
 A lawyer took it straight in hand, 
 
 Who knew his business was 
 To mind nor one nor t other side, 
 
 But make the best o th cause, 
 As always in the law s the case ; 
 
 So he his judgment gave, 
 And lawyer-like he thus resolv d 
 
 What each of them should have ; 
 Blind plaintif, lame defendant, share 
 The friendly laws impartial care, 
 A shell for him, a shell for thee, 
 The middle is the lawyer s fee. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1734. 
 
 PREFACE). 
 
 COURTEOUS READER. 
 
 Your kind and charitable assistance last 
 year, in purchasing so large an impression of my 
 Almanacks, has made my circumstances much 
 more easy in the world, and requires my grate 
 ful acknowledgement. My wife has been en 
 abled to get a pot of her own, and is no longer 
 obliged to borrow one from a neighbour ; nor 
 have we ever since been without something of 
 our own to put in it. She has also got a pair 
 of shoes, two new shifts, and a new warm pet 
 ticoat ; and for my part I have bought a second 
 hand coat, so good that I am not now ashamed 
 to go to town or be seen there. These things 
 have render d her temper so much more pa- 
 cifick than it us d to be, that I may say, I have 
 slept more and more quietly within this last 
 year, than in the three foregoing years put to 
 
34 Poor IRfcbarD tor 1734 
 
 gether. Accept my hearty thanks therefor, 
 and my sincere wishes for your health and 
 prosperity. 
 
 >,In the preface to my last Almanack, I foretold 
 the death of my dear old friend and fellow-stu 
 dent, the learned and ingenious Mr. Titan 
 Leeds, which was to be the iyth of October, 
 1733, 3 h., 29 m., P.M., at the very instant of the 
 of Q and 5 . By his own calculation, he was 
 to survive till the 26th of the same month, and 
 expire in the time of the eclipse, near 1 1 o clock, 
 A.M. At which of these times he died, or 
 whether he be really yet dead, I cannot at this 
 present writing positively assure my readers ; 
 for as much as a disorder in my own family de 
 manded my presence, and would not permit me, 
 as I had intended, to be with him in his last 
 moments,yto receive his last embrace, to close 
 his eyes, and do the duty of a friend in perform 
 ing the last offices to the departed. Therefore 
 it is that I cannot positively affirm whether he 
 be dead or not ; for the stars only show to the 
 skilful what will happen in the natural and 
 universal chain of causes and effects ; but t is 
 well known, that the events which would oth 
 erwise certainly happen, at certain times, in the 
 course of nature, are sometimes set aside or 
 postpon d, for wise and good reasons, by the 
 immediate particular disposition of Providence ; 
 
f>oor IRicbarD for 1734 35 
 
 which particular dispositions the stars can by 
 no means discover or foreshow. There is, how 
 ever, (and I cannot speak it without sorrow,) 
 ^there is the strongest probability that my dear 
 friend is no more ; for there appears in his 
 name, as I am assured, an Almanack for the 
 year 1734, in which I am treated in a very gross 
 and unhandsome manner, in which I am called 
 a false predicter, an ignorant, a conceited scrib 
 bler, a fool, and a lyar. Mr. Leeds was too well 
 bred to use any man so indecently and so scur- 
 rilously, and moreover his esteem and affection 
 for me was extraordinary : so that it is to be 
 feared that pamphlet may be only a contrivance 
 of somebody or other, who hopes, perhaps, to 
 sell two or tnree years Almanacks still, by the 
 sole force and virtue of Mr. Leeds name. But, 
 certainly, to put words into the mouth of a gen 
 tleman and a man of letters against his friend, 
 which the meanest and most scandalous of the 
 people might be ashamed to utter even in a 
 drunken quarrel, is an unpardonable injury to 
 his memory, and an imposition upon the pub- 
 lick. 
 
 Mr. Leeds was not only profoundly skilful in 
 the useful science he profess d, but he was a 
 man of exemplary sobriety, a most sincere 
 friend, r.d an exact performer of his word. 
 These valuable qualifications, with many others, 
 
36 floor ttfcbarfc for 1734 
 
 so much endeared him to me, that although it 
 should be so, that, contrary to all probability, 
 contrary to my prediction and his own, he 
 might possibly be yet alive, yet my loss of 
 honour, as a prognosticate^ cannot afford me 
 so much mortification as his life, health, and 
 safety, would give me joy and satisfaction. 
 I am, 
 
 Courteous and kind reader, 
 Your poor friend and servant, 
 
 R. SAUNDERS.* . 
 October 30, 1733. 
 
 Here I sit naked, like some fairy elf; 
 
 My seat a pumkin ; I grudge no man s pelf, 
 
 Though I ve no bread nor cheese upon my shelf. 
 
 I 11 tell thee, gratis, when it safe is 
 To purge, to bleed, or cut thy cattle, orthy self. 
 
 Good women are like stars in darkest night, 
 Their virtuous actions shining as a light 
 To guide their ignorant sex, which oft times fall, 
 And falling oft, turn diabolical. 
 
 * In "The American Almanack" for 1735, Mr. I/eeds 
 once more replied to Poor Richard s joking in these 
 words: "Corteous and Kind Reader. My Almanack 
 being in its usual Method, needs no Explanation ; but 
 perhaps it may be expected by some that I shall say 
 something concerning Poor Richard, or otherwise Rich 
 ard Saunders s Almanack, which I suppose was printed 
 in the Year 1733, for the ensuing Year 1734, wherein he 
 useth me with such good Manners, I can hardly find 
 what to say to him, without it is to advise him not to be 
 too proud because by his Predicting my Death, and his 
 writing an Almanack (I suppose at his Wifes Request) 
 
poor IRtcbarD for 1734 37 
 
 Good women, sure, are angels on the earth : 
 Of those good angels we have had a dearth ; 
 And therefore all you men that have good wives, 
 Respect their virtues equal with your lives. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 From a cross neighbour, and a sullen wife, 
 A pointless needle, and a broken knife ; 
 From suretyship, and from an empty purse, 
 A smoaky chimney, and jolting horse ; 
 From a dull razor, and an aking head ; 
 From a bad conscience, and a buggy bed, 
 A blow upon the elbow and the knee ; 
 From each of these, good L, d, deliver me. 
 
 You cannot pluck roses without fear of thorns 
 Nor enjoy a fair wife without danger of horns. 
 Without justice courage is weak. 
 Many dishes, many diseases. 
 Many medicines, few cures. 
 Where carcasses are, eagles will gather, 
 And where good laws are, much people flock thither. 
 Would you live with ease, do what you ought, and not 
 what you please. 
 Better slip with foot than tongue. 
 
 as he himself says, she has got a Pot of her own and not 
 longer obliged to borrow one from a neighbour, she has 
 got also two new Shifts, a pair of new Shoes and a new 
 warm Petticoat ; and for his own part he had bought a 
 second-hand Coat so good that he is not ashamed to go 
 to Town, or to be seen there, (Parturiant Montes !) But 
 if Falshood and Inginuity be so rewarded, What may he 
 expect if ever he be in a capacity to publish that that is 
 either Just or according to Art? Therefore I shall say 
 little more about it than, as a Friend, to advise he will 
 never take upon him to prsedict or ascribe any Persons 
 Death, till he has learned to do it better than he did 
 before." 
 
38 poor IRicbarfc for 1734 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 What death is, dost them ask me ? 
 
 Till dead I do not know. 
 
 Come to me when thou hear st I m dead ; 
 
 Then what t is I shall show. 
 
 To die s to cease to be, it seems ; 
 
 So learned Seneca did think ; 
 
 But we ve philosophers of modern date, 
 
 Who say t is death to cease to drink. 
 
 Hot things, sharp things, sweet things, cold things, 
 all rot the teeth, 
 
 And make them look like old things. 
 
 Blame-all and praise-all are two block heads. 
 
 Be temperate in wine, in eating, girls, and sloth, oi 
 the gout will seize you and plague you both. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 Some of our sparks to London town do go, 
 Fashions to see, and learu the world to know ; 
 Who at return have nought but these to show, 
 New wig above, and new disease below. 
 Thus the jack-ass, a traveller once would be, 
 And roam d abroad new fashions for to see, 
 But home returned, fashions he had none, 
 Only his main and tail were larger grown. 
 
 What pains our justice takes his faults to hide, 
 
 With half that pains sure he might cure em quite. 
 
 In success be moderate. 
 
 Take this remark from Richard, poor and lame, 
 
 Whate er s begun in anger, ends in shame. 
 
 What one relishes, nourishes. 
 
 No man e er was glorious, who was not laborious 
 
poor IRtcbarfc tor 1734 39 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 When Fortune fell asleep, and Hate did blind her, 
 Art, Fortune lost, and Ignorance did find her. 
 Since when, dull Ignorance with Fortune s store, 
 Hath been inrich d, and Art hath still been poor. 
 Poets say Fortune s blind, and cannot see, 
 But certainly they must deceived be ; 
 Klse could it not most commonly fall out, 
 That fools should have, and wise men go without. 
 
 All things are easy to industry, 
 
 All things difficult to sloth. 
 
 If you ride a horse, sit close and tight, 
 
 If you ride a man, sit easy and light. 
 
 A new truth is a truth, an old error- is an error, 
 
 Tho Clodpate won t allow either. 
 
 Don t think to hunt two hares with one dog. 
 
 Fools multiply folly. 
 
 Beauty and folly are old companions. 
 
 Hope of gain lessens pain. 
 
 Wedlock, as old men note, hath likened been, 
 Unto a public crowd or common rout ; 
 Where those that are without would fain get in, 
 And those that are within, would fain get out. 
 Grief often treads upon the heels of pleasure, 
 Marry d in haste, we oft repent at leisure ; 
 Some by experience find these words missplaced, 
 Marry d at leisure, they repent in haste. 
 
 Where there s marriage without love, there will be 
 love without marriage. 
 
 lawyers, preachers, and tomtit s eggs, there are more 
 of them hatched than come to perfection. 
 
40 ipoor IRicbarD for 1734 
 
 Be neither silly nor cunning, but wise, 
 Neither a fortress nor am******* *d will holdouf 
 long after they begin to parley. 
 Who pleasure gives, shall joy receive. 
 Be not sick too late, nor well too soon. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 When Robin now three days had married been, 
 
 And all his friends and neighbours gave him joy, 
 This question of his wife he asked then, 
 
 Why till her marriage day she proved so coy ? 
 Indeed said he, t was well thou didst not yield, 
 
 For doubtless then my purpose was to leavethee 
 O, sir, I once before was so beguil d, 
 
 And was resolved the next should not deceive m* 
 
 All things are cheap to the saving, dear to the wastefW 
 Would you persuade, speak of interest, not of reason. 
 Some men grow mad by studying much to know, 
 But who grows mad by studying good to grow. 
 Happy s the woing that s not long a doing. 
 Jack I4ttle sow d little, and little he 11 reap. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 A lawyer being sick, and extream ill, 
 Was moved by his friends to make his will, 
 Whieh soon he did, gave all the wealth he had. 
 To frantic persons, lunatick and mad. 
 And to his friends this reason did reveal, 
 (That they might see with equity he d deal,) 
 From madmen s hands I did my wealth receive, 
 Therefore that wealth to madmen s hands I leave. 
 
 There have been as great souls unknown to fame a\ 
 any of the most famous. 
 
fcoor IRfcbarD tor 1734 41 
 
 Do good to thy friend to keep him, to thy enemy to 
 gain him. 
 
 A good man is seldom uneasy, an ill one never easie. 
 
 Teach your child to hold his tongue, he 11 learn fast 
 enough to speak. 
 
 Don t value a man for the quality he is of, but for the 
 qualities he possesses. 
 
 Bucephalus, the horse of Alexander, hath as lasting 
 fame as his master. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 Some envious (speaking in their own renown,) 
 
 Say that my book was not exactly done : 
 
 They wrong me ; yet, like feasts, I d have my books 
 
 Rather be pleasing to the guests than cooks. 
 
 Ill thrives that hapless family that shows 
 
 A cock that s silent, and a hen that crows : 
 
 I know not which lives more unnatural lives, 
 
 Obeying husbands, or commanding wives. 
 
 Sam s religion is like a Cheder cheese, t is made of the 
 milk of one-and-twenty parishes. 
 
 Grief for a dead wife, and a troublesome guest, con 
 tinues to the threshold, and there is at rest, 
 
 But I mean such wives as are none of the best. 
 
 As charms are nonsense, nonsense is a charm. 
 
 He that cannot obey, cannot command. 
 
 An innocent plowman is more worthy than a vicious 
 prince. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 S 1 the smith hath lately sworn and said, 
 
 That 110 disease shall make him keep his bed ; 
 His reason is, I now begin to smell it, 
 
42 fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1734 
 
 He wants more rum, and must be forc d to sell it. 
 
 Nor less meant J h, when that vow he made, 
 
 Than to give o er his cousening tapster s trade ; 
 Who, check d for short and frothy measure, swore 
 He never would from thenceforth fill pot more. 
 
 He that is rich need not live sparingly, and he that can 
 live sparingly need not be rich. 
 
 If you would be reveng d of your enemy, govern your 
 self. 
 
 A wicked hero will turn his back to an innocent 
 coward. 
 
 I,aws like to cobwebs, catch small flies, 
 Great ones break through before your eyes. 
 An egg to-day is better than a hen to morrow. 
 Drink water, put the money in your pocket, and leave 
 the dry-bellyach in the punch -bowl. 
 
 Strange, that he who lives by shifts, can seldom shift 
 himself. 
 
 Altho thy teacher act not as he preaches, 
 Yet ne ertheless, if good, do what he teaches ; 
 Good counsel, failing men may give, for why, 
 He that s aground knows where the shoal doth lie. 
 My old friend Berryman oft, when alive, 
 Taught others thrift, himself could never thrive : 
 Thus like the whetstone, many men are wont 
 To sharpen others while themselves are blunt. 
 
 The magistrate should obey the laws, the people should 
 obey the magistrate. 
 
 When t is fair, be sure take your great coat with you. 
 He docs not possess wealth, it possesses him. 
 
poor IRicbaro for 1734 43 
 
 Necessity has no law ; I know some attorneys of the 
 
 Onions can make ev ii heirs and widows weep. 
 As sore places meet most rubs, proud folks meet most 
 affronts. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Dorothy would with John be married ; 
 
 Dorothy s wise, I trow : 
 
 But John by no means Dorothy will wed ; 
 
 John s the wiser of the two. 
 
 Those are my verses which Tom reads ; 
 
 That is very well known, 
 
 Exit in reading he makes them nonsense, 
 
 Then they are his own. 
 
 The thrifty maxim of the wary Dutch, is to save all the 
 money they can touch. 
 
 He that waits upon fortune, is never sure of a dinner. 
 
 A learned blockhead is a greater blockhead than an 
 ignorant one . 
 
 Marry your son when you will, but your daughter 
 when you can. 
 
 Avarice and happiness never saw each other, how 
 then should they become acquainted. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 By Mrs. Bridget Saunders, my Dutchess, in answer to the December 
 verses of last year. 
 
 He that for the sake of drink neglects his trade, 
 
 And spends each night in taverns till t is late, 
 
 And rises when the sun is four hours high, 
 
 And ne er regards his starving family, 
 
 God in his mercy may do much to save him, 
 
 But, woe to the poot wife, whose lot it is to have him. 
 
44 poor IRtcbarfc for 1734 
 
 Famine, plague, war, and an unnumbered throng of 
 guilt-avenging ills, to man belongs. 
 
 Is t not enough plagues, wars, and famine, rise to 
 lash our crimes, but must our wives be wise ? 
 
 He that knows nothing of it, may by chance be a 
 prophet, while the wisest that is may happen to miss. 
 
 If you would have guests merry with cheer, be so your 
 self, or so at least appear. 
 
 Reader, farewell ! all happiness attend thee ; 
 
 May each new-year better and richer find thee. 
 
 OF THE ECLIPSES, 1734. 
 
 There will be but two : The first, April 22, 18 
 min. after 5 in the morning ; the second, Octo 
 ber 15, 36 min. past i in the afternoon. Both 
 
 of the Sun ; and both, like Mrs. s s Modest}^ 
 
 and old neighbour Scrape-all s money, invisible. 
 
 Or like a certain storekeeper late of county, 
 
 not to be seen in these parts. 
 
 Since the Eclipses take up so little space, I 
 have room to comply with the new fashion, and 
 propose a mathematical question to the sons of 
 art, which, perhaps, is not more difficult to 
 solve, nor of less use when solved, than some 
 of those that have been proposed by the ingen 
 ious M. G y. 
 
 It is this : 
 
 A certain rich man had 100 orchards, in each 
 orchard was 100 apple-trees, under each apple- 
 tree was loo hogsties, in each hogstie was 100 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1734 45 
 
 sows, and each sow had 100 pigs. Question, 
 How many sow-pigs were there among them ? 
 
 Note, the answer to this question won t be 
 accepted without the solution. 
 
 Felix quern faciunt aliena pericula cautum. 
 
 To such a height th expence of COURTS is gone, 
 
 That poor men are redress d till they re undone. 
 
 William, your cause is good, give me my fee, and I 11 
 defend it. 
 
 But, alas ! William is cast, the verdict goes 
 against him. Give me another fee, and I 11 
 move the court in arrest of judgement. Then 
 sentence is confirmed. T other fee and I 11 
 bring a writ of error. But judgement is again 
 confirmed, and Will condemned to pay costs, 
 What shall we do now, Master, says William, 
 Why, since it can t be helpt, there s no more 
 to be said ; pay the knave his money, and I m 
 satisfied. 
 
 Of disposition they re most sweet, 
 
 Their clients always kindly greet ; 
 
 And tho at bar they rip old sores, 
 
 And brawl and scold like drunken w * * * * * 5 
 
 Their angers in a moment pass 
 
 Away at night over a glass ; 
 
 Nay, often laugh at the occasion, 
 
 Of their premeditated passion. 
 
 O may you prosper as you treat us, 
 
 Until the d 1 sign your quietus. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 This is the third time of my appearing in 
 print, hitherto very much to my own satisfac 
 tion, and I have reason to hope, to the satis 
 faction of the publick also ; for the public is 
 generous, and has been very charitable and good 
 to me. I should be ungrateful then, if I did 
 not take every opportunity of expressing my 
 gratitude ; for ingratum s/ dixeris omnia dix- 
 eris. I therefore return the publick my most 
 humble and hearty thanks. 
 
 Whatever may be the musick of the spheres, 
 how great soever the harmony of the stars, t is 
 certain there is no harmony among the star- 
 gazers ; but they are perpetually growling and 
 snarling at one another like strange curs, or 
 46 
 
{poor IRfcbarfc for 1735 47 
 
 like some men at their wives. I had resolved 
 to keep the peace on my own part, and affront 
 none of them ; and I shall persist in that reso 
 lution. But having receiv d much abuse from 
 Titan Leeds deceas d, (Titan Leeds when living 
 would not have used me so :) I say, having re 
 ceiv d much abuse from -the ghost of Titan 
 Leeds, who pretends to be still living, and to 
 write Almanacks in spight of me and my pre 
 dictions, I cannot help saying, that tho I take 
 it patiently, I take it very unkindly. And 
 whatever he may pretend, t is undoubtedly 
 true that he is really defunct and dead. First, 
 because the stars are seldom disappointed, 
 never but in the case of wise men, sapiens 
 dominabitur astris, and they foreshadowed his 
 death at the time I predicted it. Secondly, 
 t was requisite and necessary he should die 
 punctually at that time for the honor of astrol 
 ogy, the art professed both by him and his 
 father before him. Thirdly, t is plain to every 
 one that reads his two last Almanacks, (for 
 1734 and 35,) that they are not written with 
 that life his performances use to be written 
 with ; the wit is low and flat ; the little hints 
 dull and spiritless ; nothing smart in them but 
 Hudibras s verses against astrology at the heads 
 of the months in the last, which no astrologer 
 but a dead one would have inserted, and no man 
 
48 poor IRfcbarfc for 1735 
 
 living would or could write such .stuff as the 
 rest. But lastly, I shall convince him from his 
 own words that he is dead ; (ex ore suo condem- 
 natus est,) for in his preface to his Almanack 
 for 1734, he says: " Saunders adds another 
 gross falsehood in his Almanack, viz., that by 
 my own calculation, I shall survive until the 
 26th of the said month, October, 1733, which is 
 as untrue as the former." Now if it be as 
 Leeds says, untrue and a gross falsehood, that 
 he survived till the 26th of October, 1733, then 
 it is certainly true that he died before that time ; 
 and if he died before that time, he is dead now 
 to all intents and purposes, any thing he may 
 say to the contrary notwithstanding. And at 
 what time before the 26th is it so likely he 
 should die, as at the time by me predicted, viz., 
 the 1 7th of October aforesaid? But if some 
 people will walk and be troublesome after 
 death, it may perhaps be borne with a little, 
 because it cannot well be avoided, unless one 
 would be at the pains and expence of laying 
 them in the Red Sea ; however, they should 
 not presume too much upon the liberty allowed 
 them. I know confinement must needs be 
 mighty irksome to the free spirit of an astron 
 omer, and I am too compassionate to proceed 
 suddenly to extremities with it ; nevertheless, 
 tho I resolve with reluctance, I shall not long 
 
fcoor IRtcbarD for 1735 49 
 
 defer, if it does not speedily learn to treat its 
 living friends with better manners. 
 I am, 
 
 Courteous reader, 
 Your obliged friend and servant, 
 
 R. SAUNDBRS. 
 October 30, 1734. 
 
 Sold by the Printer hereof, 
 LARGE QUARTO BIBI.ISS OF GOOD PRINT, Small 
 Bibles, Testaments, Psalters, Primers, Account 
 Books, demi-royal and small Paper, Ink, Ink- 
 powder, Dutch Quills, Wafers, New Version of 
 Psalms, Barclay s Apology, Beavan s Primitive 
 Christianity, Vade Mecum, Aristotle s Works, 
 with several other diverting and entertaining 
 Histories. Also, all sorts of Blanks in the most 
 Authentick Forms, and correctly printed. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 The two or three necessaries. 
 
 Two or three frolicks abroad in sweet May, 
 Two or three civil things said by the way, 
 Two or three languishes, two or three sighs, 
 Two or three bless mg s and let me die s ! 
 Two or three squeezes, and two or three tow-zes, 
 With two or three hundred pound spent at their houses, 
 Can never fail cuckolding two or three spouses. 
 
 Bad commentators spoil the best of books, 
 So God ser. is meat, (thev say,) the devil cooks. 
 3 
 
50 poor Uttcbarfc for 1735 
 
 Approve not of him who commends all you say. 
 By diligence and patience, the mouse bit in two the 
 cable. 
 
 Full of courtesie, full of craft. 
 I,ook before, or you 11 find yourself behind. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Among the vain pretenders of the town, 
 Hibham of late is wondrous noted grown ; 
 Hibham scarce reads, and is not worth a groat, 
 Yet with some high-flown words and a fine coat, 
 He struts, and talks of books, and of estate, 
 
 And learned J s he calls his intimate. 
 
 The mob admire ! thus mighty impudence, 
 Supplies the want of learning, wealth, and sense. 
 
 A little house well fill d, a little field well till d, and a 
 little wife well will d, are great riches. 
 
 Old maids lead apes there, where the old batchelors are 
 turn d to apes. 
 
 Some are weatherwise, some are otherwise. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 There s many men forget their proper station, 
 And still are meddling with the administration 
 Of government ; that s wrong and this is right, 
 And such a law is out of reason quite ; 
 Thus, spending too much thought on state affairs, 
 The business is neglected, which is theirs. 
 So some fond traveller gazing at the stars, 
 Slips in next ditch, and gets a dirty a * * *. 
 
 Dyrro lynn y ddoeth e fydd. 
 
 The poor man must walk to get meat for his stomach , 
 the rich man to get a stomach to his meat. 
 
poor IRicbaro for 1735 51 
 
 He that goes far to marry, will either deceive or be 
 deceived. 
 Byes and priests bear no jests. 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 William, because his wife was something ill, 
 Uncertain in her health, indifferent still, 
 He turn d her out of doors without reply : 
 I ask d if he that act could justify. 
 In sickness and in health, says he, I am bound 
 To keep her ; when she s worse or better found, 
 I 11 take her in again ; and now you 11 see, 
 She 11 quickly either mend or end, says he. 
 
 The family of fools is ancient. 
 Necessity never made a good bargain. 
 If pride leads the van, beggary brings up the rear. 
 There s many witty men whose brains can t fill their 
 bellies. 
 Weighty questions ask for deliberate answers. 
 
 There s nought so silly, sure, as vanity, 
 Itself its chiefest end does still destroy ; 
 To be commended still its brains are racking, 
 But who will give it what it s always taking ? 
 Thou rt fair t is true ; and witty, too, I know it -, 
 And well bred, Sally, for thy manners show it ; 
 But whilst thou mak st self-praise thy only care, 
 Thou rt neither witty, nor well bred, nor fair. 
 
 Be slow in chusing a friend, slower in changing. 
 Old Hob was lately married in the night, 
 What needed day, his fair young wife was light. 
 Pain wastes the body ; pleasures the understanding. 
 

 52 poor IRicbarfc for 1735 
 
 The cunning man steals a horse, the wise man lets 
 him alone. 
 
 When $ and 9 in conjunction lie, 
 
 Then, maids, whate er is ask d of you, deny. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 When will the miser s chest be full enough ? 
 When will he cease his bags to cram and stuff? 
 All day he labours, and all night contrives, 
 Providing as if he d an hundred lives. 
 While endless care cuts short the common span ; 
 80 have I seen with dropsy swol n, a man, 
 Drink and drink more, and still unsatisfied, 
 Drink till drink drown d him, yet he thirsty dy d. 
 
 A ship under sail and a big-bellied woman, are the 
 handsomest two things that can be seen common. 
 
 Keep thy shop, and thy shop will keep thee. 
 
 The king s cheese is half wasted in parings ; but no 
 matter, t is made of the peoples milk. 
 
 Nothing but money, is sweeter than honey. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 On Louis the XIV. of France. 
 
 I^ouis ( t is true, I own to you) 
 
 Paid learned men for writing, 
 
 And valiant men for fighting ; 
 
 Himself could neither write nor fight, 
 
 Nor make his people happy ; 
 
 Yet fools will prate, and call him great, 
 
 Shame on their noddles sappy. 
 
 Of learned fools, I have seen ten times ten ; of unlearned 
 wise men, I have seen a hundred. 
 
{poor IRicbarfc for 1735 53 
 
 Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead. 
 Poverty wants some things, luxury many things, 
 avarice all things. 
 
 A lie stands on one leg, truth on two. 
 What s given shines, what s receiv d is rusty. 
 Sloth and silence are a fool s virtues. 
 
 Sam had the worst wife that a man could have, 
 Proud, lazy sot, could neither get nor save ; 
 Eternal scold she was, and what is worse, 
 
 The d / burn thee, was her common curse. 
 
 Forbear, quoth Sam, that fruitless curse, so common, 
 He 11 not hurt me, who ve married his kins-woman. 
 
 There s small revenge in words, but words may be 
 greatly revenged. 
 
 Great wits jump, says the poet, and hit his head against 
 the post. 
 
 A man is never so ridiculous by those qualities that 
 are his own, as by those that he affects to have. 
 
 Deny self for self s sake. 
 
 SEPTBMBER. 
 
 Blind are the sons of men, few of the kind, 
 Know their chief interest, or knowing, mind ; 
 Most, far from following what they know is best, 
 Trifle in earnest, but mind that in jest. 
 So Hal, the fiddle tunes harmoniously, 
 While all is discord in s (Economy. 
 
 Tim, moderate fare and abstinence much prizes in 
 pub lick, but in private gormandizes. 
 
54 {poor IRtcbarD for 1735 
 
 Ever since follies have pleased, fools have been able to 
 divert. 
 
 It is better to take many injuries, than to give one. 
 Opportunity is the great bawd. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 lyittle halfwits are wondrous pert, we find, 
 
 Scoffing and jeering on whole womankind, 
 
 All false, all whores, all this, and that, and t other, 
 
 Not one exception left, ev n for their mother. 
 
 But men of wisdom and experience know, 
 
 That there s no greater happiness below, 
 
 Than a good wife affords ; and such there s many, 
 
 For every man has one the best of any. 
 
 Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, 
 wealthy, and wise. 
 
 To be humble to superiors is duty, to equals courtesy, 
 to inferiors nobleness. 
 
 Here comes the orator, with his flood of words, and 
 his drop of reason. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 The lying habit is in some so strong, 
 
 To truth they know not how to bend their tongue ; 
 
 And tho sometimes their ends truth best would answer, 
 
 Yet lies come uppermost, do what they can, sir, 
 
 Mendacio delights in telling news, 
 
 And that it may be such, himself doth use 
 
 To make it ; but he now no longer need ; 
 
 I,et him tell truth, it will be news indeed. 
 
 Sal laughs at every thing you say. Why ? Because she 
 has fine teeth. 
 
poor IRicbarD tor 1735 55 
 
 If what most men admire, they would despise. 
 T would look as if mankind were growing wise. 
 The sun never repents of the good he does, nor does he 
 ever demand a recompence. 
 An old young man will be a young old man. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 T is not the face with a delightful air, 
 A rosy cheek, and lovely flowing hair ; 
 Nor sparkling eyes to best advantage set, 
 Nor all the members rang d in alphabet, 
 Sweet in proportion as the lovely dies, 
 Which brings th etherial bow before our eyes, 
 That can with wisdom approbation find, 
 I^ike pious morals and an honest mind, 
 By virtue s living laws from every vice refin d. 
 
 Are you angry that others disappoint you? remember 
 you cannot depend upon yourself. 
 
 One mend-fault is worth two find-faults, but one find- 
 fault is better than two make-faults. 
 
 Reader, I wish thee health, wealth, happiness, and 
 may kind heaven thy year s industry bless. 
 
 THE ECUPSES. 
 
 I shall not say much of the signification of 
 the Eclipses this year, for in truth they do not 
 signifie much ; only I may observe by the way, 
 that the first eclipse of the Moon being cele 
 brated in == Libra or the Ballance, foreshews a 
 failure of justice, where people judge in their 
 own cases. But in the following year, 1736, 
 
56 poor IRfcbarfc for 1735 
 
 there will be six Eclipses, four of the Sun, 
 and two of the Moon, which two Bclipses of 
 the Moon will be both total, and portend great 
 revolutions in Europe, particularly in Germany, 
 and some great and surprising events relating 
 to these northern colonies, of which I purpose 
 to speak at large in my next. 
 
 THE COURTS. 
 
 When Popery in Britain sway d, I ve read, 
 
 The lawyers fear d they should be d * * * d when dead. 
 
 Because they had no saint to hand their prayers, 
 
 And in Heaven s court take care of their affairs. 
 
 Therefore consulting, F^vanus they sent 
 
 To Rome with a huge purse, on this intent, 
 
 That to the holy Father making known 
 
 Their woful case, he might appoint them one. 
 
 Being arriv d, he offered his complaint 
 
 In language smooth, and humbly begs a saint : 
 
 For why, says he, when others on Heaven would call, ~\ 
 
 Physicians, seamen, scholars, tradesmen, all 
 
 Have their own saints, we lawyers none at all. ) 
 
 The pope was puzzled, never puzzled worse, 
 For with pleas d eyes he saw the proffered purse, 
 But ne er in all his knowledge or his reading, 
 He d met with one good man that practis d pleading ; 
 Who then should be the saint? he could not tell. 
 At length the thing was thus concluded well. 
 Within our city, says his holiness, 
 There is one church fill d with the images 
 Of all the saints, with whom the wall s surrounded, 
 Blindfold Evanus, lead him three times round it, 
 Then let him feel, (but give me first the purse ;) 
 And take the first he finds, for better or worse. 
 
Ipoor IRicbarD for 1735 57 
 
 Round went Ijvanus, till he came where stood 
 St. Michael with the Devil under s foot ; 
 And groping round, he seized old Satan s head, 
 This be our saint, he cries : Amen, the father said. 
 But when they open d poor Evanus eyes, 
 Alack ! he sunk with shame and with surprize. 
 
 Says ^ to $ Brother, when shall I see 
 
 Penn s people scraping acquaintance with thee ? 
 
 Says $ , only 2_f knows ; but this I can tell, 
 
 They neglect me for Hermes, they love him too well. 
 
 O, if that be the case, says ^ , ne er fear, 
 
 If they re tender of Hermes, and holding him so dear 
 
 They 11 solicit thy help e er I ve finish d my round, 
 
 Using ,5 Hermes foes to deter or confound. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1736. 
 
 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 LOVING READERS, 
 
 Your kind acceptance of my former labours 
 has encouraged me to continue writing, tho 
 the general approbation you have been so good 
 as to favour me with, has excited the envy of 
 some, and drawn upon me the malice of others. 
 These ill-willers of mine, despited at the great 
 reputation I gain d by exactly predicting 
 another man s death, have endeavoured to de 
 prive me of it all at once in the most effectual 
 manner, by reporting that I myself was never 
 alive. They say, in short, that there is no such 
 a mav as I a>n ; and have spread this notion 
 so thoroughly in the country, that I have been 
 frequently told it to my face by those that don t 
 know me. This is not civil treatment, to en 
 deavour to deprive me of my very being, and 
 reduce me to a non-entity in the opinion of the 
 publick. But so long as I know myself to walk 
 about, eat, drink and sleep, I am satisfied that 
 
 - 58 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1736 59 
 
 there is really such a man as I am, whatever 
 they may say to the contrary. And the world 
 may be satisfied likewise, for if there was 
 no such man as I am, how is it possible I 
 should appear pubickly to hundreds of people, 
 as I have done for several years past, in print ? 
 I need not, indeed, have taken any notice of so 
 idle a report, if it had not been for the sake of 
 my printer, to whom my enemies are pleased 
 to ascribe my productions ; and who it seems is 
 as unwillingly to father my offspring as I am to 
 lose the credit of it. Therefore, to clear him 
 entirely, as well as to vindicate my own honour, 
 I make this publick and serious declaration, 
 which I desire may be believed, to wit : That 
 what I have written heretofore, and do now 
 write, neither was, nor is written by any other 
 man or men, person or persons, whatsoever. 
 Those who are not satisfied with this, must 
 needs be very unreasonable. 
 
 My performance for this year follows ; it 
 submits itself, kind reader, to thy censure, but 
 hopes (for) thy candor, to forgive its faults. It 
 devotes itself entirely to thy service, and will 
 serve thee faithfully. And if it has the good 
 fortune to please its master, t is gratification 
 enough for the labour of 
 
 poor 
 
 R. SAUNDERS. 
 
60 fcoor IRicbarD for 1736 
 
 Presumptuous man ! the reason would st thou find 
 Why formed so weak, so little, and so blind ? 
 First, if thou canst, the harder reason guess, 
 Why formed no weaker, blinder, and no less? 
 Ask of thy mother earth, why oaks are made 
 Taller or stronger than the weeds they shade ? 
 Or ask of yonder argent fields above, 
 Why Jove s sattelites are less than Jove ? 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Some have learn t many tricks of sly evasion, 
 
 Instead of truth they use equivocation, 
 
 And eke it out with mental reservation, 
 
 Which, to good men, is an abomination. 
 
 Our smith of late most wonderfully swore, 
 
 That whilst he breathed he would drink no more, 
 
 But since, I know his meaning, for I think, 
 
 He meant he would not breathe whilst he did drink. 
 
 He is no clown that drives the plow, but he that doth 
 clownish things. 
 
 If you know how to spend less than you get, you have 
 the philosopher s-stone. 
 
 The good pay-master is lord of another man s purse. 
 
 Fish and visitors smell in three days. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Sam s wife provok d him once ; he broke her crown. 
 The surgeon s bill amounted to five pounds ; 
 This blow (she brags) has cost my husband dear, 
 He 11 ne er strike more, Sam chanc d to overhear. 
 Therefore, before his wife the bill he pays, 
 And to the surgeon in her Bearing says .- 
 Doctor, you charge five pound, here e en take ten, 
 My wife may chance to want your help again. 
 
fioor Iflfcbarfc for 1736 61 
 
 He that has neither fools nor beggars among his kin 
 dred, is the son of thunder-gust. 
 
 Diligence is the mother of good luck. 
 
 Do not do that which you would not have known. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 Whate er s desired, knowledge, fame, or pelf, 
 Not one will change his neighbour with himself; 
 The learn d are happy nature to explore, 
 The fool is happy that he knows no more. 
 The rich are happy in the plenty given ; 
 The poor contents him with the care of heaven. 
 Thus does some comfort ev ry state attend, 
 And pride s bestowed on all, a common friend. 
 
 Never praise your cider or horse. 
 
 Wealth is not his that has it, but his that enjoys it. 
 
 T is easy to see, hard to foresee. 
 
 In a discreet man s mouth a publick thing is private. 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 By nought is man from beast distinguished, 
 More than by knowledge in his learned head, 
 Then youth improve thy time, but cautious see 
 That what thou learnest somehow useful be ; 
 F^ach day improving, Solon waxed old ; 
 For time he knew was better far than gold : 
 Fortune might give him gold which would decay, 
 But fortune cannot give him yesterday. 
 
 I^et thy maid-servant be faithful, strong, and homely. 
 Keep flax from fire, youth from gaming. 
 Bargaining has neither friends nor relations. 
 Admiration is the daughter of ignorance. 
 There s more old drunkards, than old doctors. 
 
62 poor IRtcbarfc for 1736 
 
 MAY. 
 
 I^alus who loves to hear himself discourse, 
 Keeps talking still as if he frantick were, 
 And tho himself might no where hear a worse ; 
 Yet he no other but himself will hear. 
 Stop not his mouth, if he be troublesome, 
 But stop his ears, and then the man is dumb. 
 
 Here comes Courage ! that seized the lion absent, and 
 ran away from the present mouse. 
 
 He that takes a wife takes care. 
 
 Nor eye in a letter, nor hand in a purse, nor ear in the 
 secret of another. 
 
 He that buys by the penny, maintains not only him 
 self, but other people. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Things that are bitter, bitterer than gall, 
 
 Physicians say are always physical : 
 
 Now women s tongues if into powder beaten, 
 
 May in a potion or a pill be eaten, 
 
 And as there s nought more bitter, I do muse, 
 
 That women s tongues in physick they ne er use. 
 
 Myself and others who lead restless lives, 
 
 Would spare that bitter member of our wives. 
 
 He that can have patience can have what he will. 
 Now I have a sheep and a cow, every body bids me 
 ^ood-morrow. 
 
 God helps them that help themselves. 
 Why does the blind man s wife paint herself? 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Who can charge Ebrio with a thirst for wealth ? 
 See, he consumes his money, time, and health 
 
fcoor TCfcbarfc for 1736 63 
 
 In drunken frolicks, which will all confound, 
 Neglects his farm, forgets to till his ground ; 
 His stock grows less that might be kept with ease ; 
 In nought but guts and debts he finds increase ; 
 In town reels as if he d shove down each wall, 
 Yet walls must stand, poor soul, or he must fall. 
 
 None preaches better than the ant, and she says; 
 nothing. 
 
 The absent are never without fault, nor the present 
 without excuse. 
 
 Gifts burst rocks. 
 
 If wind blows on you through a hole, 
 
 Make your will and take care of your soul. 
 
 The rotten apple spoils his companion. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 The tongue was once a servant of the heart, 
 And what it gave she freely did impart ; . 
 But, now hypocrisy is grown so strong, 
 The heart s become a servant to the tongue. 
 Virtue we praise, but practice not her good, 
 (Athenian-like) we act not what we know, 
 As many men do talk of Robin Hood, 
 Who never did shoot arrow in his bow. 
 
 Don t throw stones at your neighbors , if your owi 
 windows are glass. 
 
 The excellency of hogs is fatness, of men virtue. 
 
 Good wives and good plantations are made by gooc 
 husbands. 
 
 He that sells upon trust, loses many friends, anc 
 always wants money. 
 
64 fcoor IRicbarD for 1736 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 Briscap, thou si little judgement in thy head 
 More than to dress thee, drink and go to bed ; 
 Yet thou shalt have the wall and the way lead, 
 Since logick wills that simple things preceed. 
 Walking and meeting one not long ago, 
 I ask d who t was, he said, he did not know, 
 I said, I know thee ; so said he, I you ; 
 But he that knows himself I never knew. 
 
 I/overs, travellers, and poets, will give money to be 
 heard. 
 
 He that speaks much, is much mistaken. 
 Creditors have better memories than debtors. 
 Forewarn d, forearm d. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 Whymsical Will once fancy d he was ill, 
 
 The Doctor call d, who thus examin d Will ; 
 
 How is your appetite ? O, as to that 
 
 I eat quite heartily, you see I m fat ; 
 
 How is your sleep anights ? T is sound and good ; 
 
 I eat, drink, sleep, as well as e er I cou d. 
 
 Will, says the doctor, clapping on his hat, 
 
 I 11 give you something shall remove all that. 
 
 Three things are men most likely to be cheated in, a 
 horse, a wig, and a wife. 
 
 He that lives well is learned enough. 
 
 Poverty, poetry, and new titles of honour, make men 
 ridiculous. 
 
 He that scatters thorns, lt him not go barefoot. 
 There s none deceived but he that trusts. 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1736 65 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 When you are sick, what you like best is to 
 be chosen for a medicine in the first place ; 
 what experience tells you is best, to be chosen 
 in the second place ; what reason (i. e. Theory,) 
 says is best, is to be chosen in the last place. 
 But if you can get Dr. Inclination, Dr. Experi 
 ence, and Dr. Reason to hold a consultation 
 together, they will give you the best advice 
 that can be taken. 
 
 God heals and the doctor takes the fee. 
 
 If you desire many things, many things will seem but 
 a few, 
 
 Mary s mouth costs her nothing, for she never opens 
 it but at others expence. 
 
 Receive betore you write, but write before you pay. 
 
 I saw few die of hunger, ot eating 100,000. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 nearer the earth in winter than in summer, 
 15046 miles, (his lownes and short appearance 
 making winter cold, ( nearer in her Perigon 
 than Apogem, 69512 : T J nearer 49868 miles : 
 U nearer 38613 miles : $ nearer 80608 miles : 
 ? nearer 6209 miles : nearer 181427 miles. 
 And yet is never distant from the Q a whole 
 sign, nor ot two. You 11 never find a * Q , 
 nor a n O ?. 
 
 Maids of America, who gave you bad teeth f 
 Answer. Hot soupin^s an:l frozen apples. 
 5 
 
66 poor IRtcbaro for 1736 
 
 Marry your daughter and eat fresh fish betimes. 
 He that would live in peace and at ease, 
 Must not speak all he knows, nor judge all he sees. 
 
 Adieu. 
 
 In my last year s Almanack, I mentioned that 
 the visible Eclipses of this year, 1736, portended 
 some great and surprising events relating to 
 these NORTHERN COLONIES, of which I proposed 
 this year to speak at large. But as those events 
 are not to happen immediately this year, I chuse 
 rather, upon second thought, to defer farther 
 mention of them, till the publication of my Al 
 manack for that year in which they are to 
 happen. However, that the reader may not be 
 entirely disappointed, here follow, for his pres- 
 ent amusement, a few 
 
 ENIGMATICAL PROPHECIES, 
 
 Which they that do not understand, cannot well 
 explain. 
 
 I. Before the middle of this year, a wind at N. 
 East will arise, during which the water of the 
 sea and rivers will be in such a manner raised, 
 that great part of the towns of Boston, New 
 port, New-York, Philadelphia, the low lands 
 of Maryland and Virginia, and the town of 
 Charleston in South Carolina will be under 
 water. Happy will it be for the sugar and salt, 
 standing in the cellars of those places, if there 
 be tight roofs and ceilings overhead ; otherwise 
 
IRtcbai-5 tor 1736 67 
 
 without being a Conjurer, a man may easily 
 foretel that such commodities will receive 
 damage. 
 
 2. About the middle of the year, great number 
 of vessels fully laden, will be taken out of the 
 ports aforesaid, by a power with which we are 
 not now at war, and whose forces shall not be 
 descried or seen, either coming or going. But 
 in the end this may not be disadvantageous to 
 those places. 
 
 3. However, not long after, a visible Army of 
 20,000 Musketeers will land, some in Virginia 
 and Maryland, and some in the lower counties 
 on both sides of Delaware, who will over-run 
 the country, and sorely annoy the inhabitants : 
 But the air in this climate will agree with them 
 so ill towards winter, that they will die in the 
 beginning of cold weather like rotten sheep, 
 and by Christmas the inhabitants will get the 
 better of them. 
 
 Note, In my next Almanack these Enig 
 matical Prophecies will be explained. 
 
 For gratitude there s none exceed em, 
 (Their clients know this when they bleed em,) 
 Since they who give most for their laws, 
 Have most returned, and carry th Cause. 
 All know, except an arrant Tory, 
 That Right and Wrong s meer Ceremony, 
 It is enough that the law jargon, 
 Gives the best bidder the best bargain. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1737. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS AND KIND READER, 
 
 This is the fifth time I have appeared in 
 publick, chalking out the future year for my 
 honest countrymen, and foretelling what shall, 
 and what may, and what may not come to pass ; 
 in which I have the pleasure to find that I have 
 given general satisfaction. Indeed, among the 
 multitude of our astrological predictions, t is no 
 wonder if some few fail ; for, without any de 
 fect in the art itself, t is well known that a 
 small error, a single wrong figure overseen in a 
 calculation, may occasion great mistakes: But, 
 however, we Almanack -makers may miss it in 
 other things, I believe it will generally be al 
 lowed that ive always hit the day of the month, 
 and that I suppose is esteem d one of the most 
 useful things in an Almanack. 
 68 
 
poor IRtcbarfc for 1737 69 
 
 As to the weather, if I was to fall into the 
 
 method my brother J n sometimes uses, and 
 
 tell you, Snow here, or in New-England, Rain 
 here, or in South Carolina, Cold to the north 
 ward, Warm to the southward, and the like, 
 whatever errors I might commit, I should be 
 something more secure of not being detected in 
 them : But I consider it will be of no service 
 to any body to know what weather it is icoo 
 miles off, and therefore I always set down posi 
 tively what weather my reader will have, be he 
 where he will at the time. We modestly desire 
 only the favourable allowance of a day or two 
 before, and a day or two after the precise day 
 against which the weather is set ; and if it does 
 not come to pass accordingly, let the fault be 
 laid upon the printer, who, t is very like, may 
 have transposed or misplac d it, perhaps for the 
 conveniency of putting in his holidays : and 
 since, in spight of all I can say, people will give 
 him great part of the credit of making my Al 
 manacks, t is but reasonable he should take 
 some share of the blame. 
 
 I must not here omit to thank the publick 
 for the gracious and kind encouragement they 
 have hitherto given me : But if the generous 
 purchaser of my labours could see how often 
 his Fi 1 pence helps to light up the comfortable 
 fire ? line the pot, fill the cup and make glad the 
 
70 poor IRicbarfc for 1737 
 
 heart of a poor man, and an honest good old 
 woman, he would not think his money ill laid 
 out, though the Almanack of his friend and 
 servant, 
 
 R. SAUNDBRS, 
 were one half blank paper. 
 
 HINTS TO THOSE THAT WOULD BE RICH. 
 
 The use of money is all the advantage there is in hav 
 ing money. 
 
 For d a year you may have use of 100^, if you are a 
 man of known prudence and honesty. 
 
 He that spends a groat a-day idly, spends idly above 
 & a year, which is the price of using 100^". 
 
 He that wastes idly a groat s worth of his time per day^ 
 one day with another, wastes the privilege of using 100^ 
 each day. 
 
 He that idly loses $s. worth of time, loses 55., and migh*. 
 as prudently throw $s. into the river. 
 
 He that loses 55. not only loses that sum, but all the 
 other advantage that might be made by turning it in 
 dealing, which, by the time a young man becomes old 
 amounts to a comfortable bag of money. 
 
 Again, He that sells upon credit, asks a price for wha 
 he sells equivalent to the principal and interest of his 
 money for the time he is like to be kept out of it ; 
 therefore, 
 
 He that buys upon credit pays interest for what he 
 buys, 
 
 And he that pays ready money, might let that money 
 out to use ; so that 
 
 He that possesses atiy thing he has bought, pays 
 interest for the use of it. 
 
poor IRicbarfc for 1737 71 
 
 Consider then, when you are tempted to buy any un 
 necessary household stuff, or any superfluous thing, 
 whether you will be willing to pay interest, and interest 
 upon interest for it as long as you live, and more if it 
 grows worse by using. 
 
 Yet, in buying goods, Y is best to pay ready money, because, 
 
 He that sells upon credit, expects to lose 5 per cent by 
 bad debts ; therefore he charges on all he sells upon 
 credit, an advance that shall make up that deficiency. 
 
 Those who pay for what they buy upon credit, pay 
 their share of this advance. 
 
 He that pays ready money, escapes, or may escape, 
 that charge. 
 
 A penny saved is twopence clear. A pin a-day is a groat 
 a-year. Save and have. 
 
 Every little makes a mickle. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 God offer d to the Jews salvation, 
 And twas refus d by half the nation : 
 Thus (tho t is life s great preservation), 
 Many oppose innoculation. 
 We re told by one of the black robe, 
 The devil innoculated Job : 
 Suppose t is true, what he does tell ; 
 Pray, neighbours, dtd not Job do well f 
 
 The master-piece of man, is to live to the purpose. 
 
 He that steals the old man s supper do s him no wrong 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 The Thracian infant, entering into life, 
 Both parents mourn for, both receive with grief, 
 The Thracian infant snatched by Death away, 
 Both parents to the grave with joy convey. 
 
72 poor IRfcbaro for 1737 
 
 This Greece and Rome you with derision view, 
 This is meet Thracian ignorance to you ; 
 But if you weigh the custom you despise, 
 This Thracian ignorance may teach the wise. 
 
 A countryman between two lawyers, is like a fish 
 between two cats. 
 
 He that can take rest is greater than he that can take 
 cities. 
 
 The miser s cheese is wholesomest. 
 
 Doris a widow past her prime, 
 
 Her spouse long dead, her wailing doubles ; 
 Her real griefs increase by time ; 
 
 What might abate, improves her troubles. 
 Those pangs her prudent hopes supprest, 
 
 Impatient now she cannot smother, 
 How should the helpless woman rest ? 
 
 One s gone ; nor can she get another. 
 
 I^ove and I^ordship hate companions. 
 
 The nearest way to come at glory, is to do that for 
 conscience which we do for glory. 
 
 There is much money given to be laught at, though 
 the purchasers don t know it; witness A s fine horse, 
 and B s fine house. 
 
 A nymph and a swain to Apollo once prayed, 
 
 The swain had been jilted, the nymph been betray d ; 
 
 They came for to try if his oracle knew, 
 
 K er a nymph that was chaste, or a swain that was true. 
 
 Apollo stood mute, and had like t have been pos d, 
 
 At length he thus sagely the question disclos d ; 
 
Ipoor IRicbarfc for 1737 73 
 
 He alone may be true in whom none will confide, 
 
 And the nymph may be chaste that has never been try d. 
 
 He that can compose himself, is wiser than he that 
 composes books. 
 
 Poor Dick eats like a well man, and drinks like a sick 
 After crosses and losses, men grow humbler and wiser 
 I^ove, cough, and a smoke, can t well be hid. 
 
 Rich Gripe does all his thoughts and cunning bend, 
 T increase that wealth he wants the soul to spend, 
 Poor Shifter does his whole contrivance set, 
 To spend that wealth he wants the sense to get. 
 How happy would appear to each his fate, 
 Had Gripe his humour, or he Gripe s estate ? 
 Kindyafe and fortune, blend em if you can, 
 And of two wretches make one happy man. 
 
 Well done is better than well said. 
 
 Fine linnen, girls and gold so bright. 
 
 Chuse not to take by candle light. 
 
 He that can travel well a-foot, keeps a good horse. 
 
 There are no ugly loves, nor handsome prisons. 
 
 No better relation than a prudent and faithful friend 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Boy, bring a bowl of china here, 
 Fill it with water cool and clear ; 
 Decanter with Jamaica ripe, 
 And spoon of silver, clean and bright, 
 Sugar twice-fin d in pieces cut, 
 Knife, sieve, and glass in order put, 
 Bring forth the fragrant fruit, and then 
 We re happy till the clock strikes ten, 
 
74 poor IRtcbarfc tor 1737 
 
 A traveller should have a hog s nose, deer s legs, and 
 an ass s back. 
 
 At the working man s house hunger looks in, but 
 dares not enter. 
 
 A good lawyer, a bad neighbour. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Impudent Jack, who now lives by his shifts, 
 Borrowing of driblets, boldly begging gifts, 
 For twenty shillings lent him t other day, 
 (By one who ne er expected he would pay.) 
 On his friend s paper fain a note wou d write ; 
 His friend, as needless, did refuse it quite ; 
 Paper was scarce, and t was too hard, it s true, 
 To part with cash, and lose his paper too. 
 
 Certainlie these things agree, the priest, the lawyer, 
 
 and death, all three ; 
 
 Death takes both the weak and the strong, 
 The lawyer takes from both right and wrong, 
 And the priest from the living and dead has his fee. 
 The worst wheel of the cart makes the most noise. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 Oa his death bed poor I^ubin lies ; 
 
 His spouse is in despair ; 
 With frequent sobs, and mutual cries 
 
 They both express their care. 
 A diff rent cause, says parson Sly, 
 
 The same effect may give, 
 Poor Lubin fears that he shall die ; 
 His wife- that he may live. 
 
 Don t misinform your doctor nor your lawyer. 
 
 never saw an oft-transplanted tree, 
 Nor yet an oft-removed family, 
 That throve so well as those that settled be. 
 
(poor IRtcbarD for 1737 75 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 To-morrow you 11 reform, you always cry ; 
 In what /ar country does this morrow lie, 
 That t is so mighty long ere it arrive ? 
 Beyond the Indies does this morrow live ? 
 T*is so far-fetched, this morrow, that I fear 
 T will bs both very old, and very dear. 
 To-morrow I 11 reform, the fool does say ; 
 To-day itself s too late ; the wise did yesterday. 
 
 I/et the letter stay for the post, and not the post for 
 the letter. 
 Three good meals a day is bad living. 
 
 T is better leave for an enemy at one s death, than 
 beg of a friend in one s life. 
 
 To whom thy secret thou dost tell, 
 To him thy freedom thou dost sell. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 On T. T. who destroyed his Landlord s fine wood. 
 
 Indulgent nature to each kind bestows, 
 
 A secret instinct to discern its foes : 
 
 The goose, a silly bird, avoids the fox ; 
 
 I/ambs fly from wolves ; and sailors steer from rocks ; 
 
 A rogue the gallows, as his fate, foresees, 
 
 And bears the like antipathy to trees. 
 
 If you d have a servant that you like, serve yourself. 
 
 He that pursues two hares at once, does not catch one 
 and lets t other go. 
 
 If you want a neat wife, chuse her on a Saturday. 
 If you have time, don t wait for time. 
 
76 poor TRicbarfc for 1737 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 You say you 11 spend five hundred pound, 
 
 The world and men to know, 
 And take a tour all Europe round, 
 
 Improving as you go. 
 Dear Sam, in search of other s sense, 
 
 Discover not your own ; 
 But wisely double the expence, 
 
 That you may pass unknown. 
 
 Tell a miser he s rich, and a woman she s old, you 11 
 get no money of one, nor kindness oft other. 
 
 Don t go to the doctor with every distemper, nor to the 
 lawyer with every quarrel, nor to the pot for every 
 thirst. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Women are books, and men the readers be, 
 
 Who sometimes in those books erratas see ; 
 
 Yet oft the reader s raptured with each line, 
 
 Fair print and paper, fraught with sense divine ; 
 
 Tho some, neglectful, seldom care to read, 
 
 And faithful wives no more than bibles heed. 
 
 Are women books? says Hodge, then would mine were 
 
 An Almanack, to change her every year. 
 
 The creditors are a superstitious sect, great observers 
 of set days and times. 
 
 The noblest question in the world is, What good may I 
 do in it ? 
 
 Nee sibi, sed toto, genitum se credere mundo.* 
 
 Nothing so popular as goodness. 
 
 * To believe himself born, not for himself, but for the 
 whole world. -lyUCAN, " Pharsalia," 
 
poor IRicbarfc for 1737 7? 
 
 In my last I published some Enigmatical 
 Prophecies, which I did not expect any one 
 would take for serious predictions. The ex 
 planation I promised follows, viz : 
 
 1. The water of the sea and rivers is raised in 
 vapours by the sun, is form d into clouds in the 
 air, and thence descends in rain. Now when there 
 is rain overhead (which frequently happens when 
 the wind is at N.B.) the cities and places on the 
 earth below, are certainly under water. 
 
 2. The power with which we were not then at 
 war, but which, it was said, would take many 
 full laden vessels out of our ports before the end 
 of the year, is the WIND, whose forces also are 
 not descried either coming or going. 
 
 3. The army which it was said would land in 
 Virginia, Maryland, and the lower counties on 
 Delaware, were not Musketeers, with guns on 
 their shoulders as some expected ; but their 
 namesakes, in pronunciation, tho truly spelt 
 Moschitos, arm d only with a sharp sting. Every 
 one knows they are fish before they fly, being 
 bred in the water ; and therefore may properly 
 be said to land before they become generally 
 troublesome. 
 
 A WONDERFUL PROPHECY. 
 
 For jfanuary, 1737, -which consists entirely of odd figures. 
 
 E er of this odd odd year one month has roll d, 
 What wonders, reader, shall the world behold I 
 
78 fcoor IRtcbarfc for 1737 
 
 Four kings with mighty force shall Albion s isle 
 Infest with wars and tumults for a-while ; 
 Then some shall unexpected treasures gain, 
 While some mourn o er an empty purse in vain 
 And many a Christian s heart shall ake for fear, 
 When they the dreadful sound of trump -shall hear, 
 Dead bones shall then be tumbled up and down, 
 In every city and in every town. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1738. 
 
 PREFACE BY MISTRESS SAUNDERS. 
 
 DEAR READERS, 
 
 My good man set out last week for Potow- 
 mack, to visit an old stargazer of his acquaint 
 ance, and to see about a little place for us to 
 settle and end our days on. He left a copy of 
 his Almanack seal d up, and bid me send it to 
 the press. I suspected something, and therefor, 
 as soon as he was gone, I open d it, to see if he 
 had not been flinging some of his old skitts at 
 me. Just as I thought, so it was. And truly 
 (for want of something else to say, I suppose,) 
 he had put into his preface, that his wife Bridget 
 was this, and that, and t other. What a pease- 
 cods ! cannot I have a little fault or two, but all 
 the country must see it in print ! They have 
 already been told, at one time that I am proud, 
 another time that I am loud, and that I have 
 
8o fcoor ttfcbarfc for 1738 
 
 got a new petticoat, and abundance of that kind 
 of stuff ; and now forsooth ! all the world must 
 know, that poor Dick s wife has lately taken a 
 fancy to drink a little tea now and then. A 
 mighty matter truly, to make a song of ! T is 
 true I had a little tea of a present from the 
 Printer last year ; and what, must a-body throw 
 it away ? In short, I thought the preface was 
 not worth a-printing, and so I fairly scratch d it 
 all out, and I believe you 11 like our Almanack 
 never the worse for it. 
 
 Upon looking over the months, I see he has 
 put in abundance of foul weather this year ; 
 and therefor I have scattered here and there, 
 where I could find room, some fair, pleasant, 
 sunshiny, &c., for the good women to dry their 
 clothes in. If it does not come to pass accord 
 ing to my desire, I have shown my goodwill, 
 however ; and I hope they 11 take it in good part. 
 
 I had a design to make some other correc 
 tions ; and particularly to change some of the 
 verses that I don t very well like ; but I have 
 just now unluckily broke my spectacles ; which 
 obliges me to give it you as it is, and conclude 
 Your loving friend, 
 
 BRIDGET SAUNDBRS. 
 
 You will excuse me, dear readers, that 1 
 afford you no eclipses of the moon this year. 
 
floor IRfcbarfc for 1738 81 
 
 The truth is, I do not find they do you any 
 good. 
 
 When there is one you are apt in observing 
 it to expose yourselves too much and too long 
 to the night air, whereby great numbers of you 
 catch cold. Which was the case last year, to 
 my very great concern. However, if you will 
 promise to take more care of yourselves, you 
 shall have a fine one to stare at the year after 
 next. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Dick s wife was sick, and pos d the doctors skill, 
 Who differ d how to cure th inveterate ill. 
 Purging the one prescribed. No, quoth another, 
 That will do neither good nor harm, my brother, 
 Bleeding s the only way ; t was quick reply d, 
 That s certain death ; but e en let Dick decide. 
 " J se no great skill " quo Richard, " by the Rood, 
 But I think bleeding <> like to do most good." 
 
 There are three faithful friends an old wife, an old 
 dog, and ready money. 
 
 Great talkers should be crop d, for they have no need 
 of ears. 
 
 If you would have your shoes last, put no nails in em. 
 
 Who has deceiv d thee so oft as thyself? 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 In Christendom we all are Christians now, 
 
 And thus I answer, if you ask me how ; 
 
 Where with Christ s rules our lives will not comply, 
 
 We bend it like a rule of lead, say I ; 
 
 Making it thus comply with what we be, 
 
82 fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1738 
 
 And only thus our lives with th rule agree. 
 
 But from our fathers we ve the name perchance, 
 
 So as our king is called the king of France. 
 
 Is there anything men take more pains about than to 
 make themselves unhappy ? 
 
 Nothing brings more pain than too much pleasure ; 
 nothing more bondage than too much liberty, (or lib 
 ertinism). 
 
 Read much, but not too many books. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 Jack s wife was born in Wiltshire, brought up 
 in Cumberland, led much of her life in Bed 
 fordshire, sent her husband into Hunting ton- 
 shire in order to send him into Buckingham 
 shire. But he took courage in Hartfordshire, 
 and carried her into Staffordshire, or else he 
 might have lived and died in Shrewsbury. 
 
 He that would have a short I^ent, let him borrow 
 money to be repaid at faster. 
 
 Write with the learned, pronounce with the vulgar. 
 Fly pleasures, and they 11 follow you. 
 
 The Old Gentry. 
 
 That all from Adam first begun, 
 Since none but Whiston doubts, 
 
 And that his son, and his son s son 
 Were ploughmen, clowns and louts ; 
 
fcoor TClcbarD for 173S 83 
 
 Here lies the only difference now, 
 
 Some shot off late, some soon ; 
 Your sires i th morning left the plow, 
 
 And ours i th afternoon. 
 
 Caesar did not merit the triumphal car more than he 
 that conquers himself. 
 
 Hast thou virtue ? acquire also the graces and beau 
 ties of virtue. 
 
 Buy what thou hast no need of, and e er long thou 
 Shalt sell thy necessaries. 
 
 If thou hast wit and learning, add to it wisdom and 
 modesty. 
 
 MAY. 
 
 A Frugal Thought. 
 
 In an acre of land are 43,560 square feet. 
 
 In 100 acres are 4,356,000 square feet ; 
 
 Twenty pounds will buy 100 acres of the proprietor, 
 
 In x> are 4,800 pence ; by which divide the 
 
 Number of feet in 100 acres ; and you will find 
 
 That one penny will buy 907 square feet ; or 
 
 A lot of 30 feet square Save your pence. 
 
 You may be more happy than princes, if you will be 
 more virtuous. 
 
 If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are dead 
 and rotten, either write things worth reading, or do 
 things worth the writing. 
 
 Sell not virtue to purchase wealth, nor liberty to pur 
 chase power. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Epitaph on a talkative Old Maid. 
 Beneath this silent stone is laid, 
 A noisy, antiquated maid, 
 Who, from her cradle talk d till death, 
 And ne er before was out of breath. 
 
84 poor tfticbarfc tor 1738 
 
 Whither she s gone we cannot tell ; 
 
 For if she talks not, she s in ! 
 
 If she s in , she s there unblest 
 
 Because she hates a place of rest. 
 
 Let thy vices die before thee. 
 
 Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut 
 afterwards. 
 
 The ancients tell us what is best ; but we must learn 
 of the moderns what is fittest. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 One month a lawyer, thou the next will be 
 A grave physician, and the third a priest : 
 Chuse quickly one profession of the three, 
 Marry d to her thou yet may st court the rest. 
 Resolve at once ; deliberate no more ; 
 I,eap in, and stand not shiv ring on the shore. 
 On any one amiss thou can st not fall ; 
 Thou It end in nothing, if thou grasps at all. 
 
 Since I cannot govern my own tongue tho within my 
 own teeth, how can I hope to govern the tongues of 
 others ? 
 
 T is less discredit to abridge petty charges, than to 
 stoop to petty gettings. 
 
 Since thou art net sure of a minute, throw not away 
 an hour. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 While faster than his costive brain indites, 
 Philo s quick hand in flowing nonsense writes, 
 His case appears to me like honest Teague s, 
 When he was run away with by his legs. 
 Phoebus, give Philo o er himself command ; 
 Quicken his senses, or restrain his hand ; 
 Let him be kept from paper, pen and ink ; 
 So he may cease to write and learn to think. 
 
IRicbarfc for 1738 85 
 
 If you do what you should not, you must hear what 
 you would not. 
 
 Defer not thy well doing ; be not like St. George, who 
 is always a-horseback, and never rides on. 
 
 Wish not so much to live long, as to live well. 
 
 These lines may be read backward or forward. 
 Joy, Mirth, Triumph, I do defie : 
 Destroy me death fain would I die : 
 Forlorn am I, love is exil d, 
 Scorn smiles thereat ; hope is beguil d, 
 
 Men banish d bliss, in woe must dwell, 
 Then joy, mirth, triumph, all farewell. 
 
 As we must account for every idle word, so we must for 
 every idle silence. 
 
 I have never seen the Philosopher s stone that turnslead 
 into gold, but I have known the pursuit of it turn a man s 
 gold into lead. 
 
 Never intreat a servant to dwell with thee. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 A doubtful meaning. 
 
 The female kind is counted ill : 
 
 And is indeed : the contrary ; 
 
 No man can find : that hurt they will : 
 
 But every where : shew charity : 
 
 To nobody ; malicious still ; 
 
 In word or deed : believe you me. 
 
 Time is an herb that cures all diseases. 
 
 Reading makes a full man meditation a profound 
 man discourse a clear man. 
 
 If any man flatters me, I 11 flatter him again, though 
 he were my best friend. 
 
86 poor IRicbaro for 1738 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 A monster in a course of vice grown old, 
 Iveaves to his gaping heir his ill gain d gold ; 
 The preacher fee d, strait are his virtues shown ; 
 And render d lasting by the sculptur d stone. 
 If on the stone or sermon we rely, 
 Pity a worth like his, should ever die ! 
 If credit to his real life we give, 
 Pity a wretch like him, should ever live. 
 
 Wish a miser long life, and you wish him no good. 
 
 None but the well-bred man knows how to confess a 
 fault, or acknowledge himself in an error. 
 
 Drive thy business ; let not that drive thee. 
 
 There is much difference between imitating a good 
 man, and counterfeiting him. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 The wise man says, it is a wise man s part 
 
 To keep his tongiie close prisoner in his heart. 
 
 If he then be a fool whose thought denies 
 
 There is a God, how desp rately unwise, 
 
 How much more fool is he, whose language shall 
 
 Proclaim in public, there s no God at all : 
 
 What then are they, nay fools in what degree, 
 
 Whose actions shall maintain t ? Such fools are we, 
 
 Wink at small faults remember thou hast great ones. 
 Hat to please thyself, but dress to please others. 
 Search others for their virtues, thyself for thy vices. 
 Never spare the parson s wine, nor baker s pudding. 
 Each year one vicious habit rooted out, 
 In time might make the worst man good throughout. 
 
 Ready money for OLD RA GS may be had of the. printer 
 
 hereof; by whom is made and sold very good 
 
 LAMPBLACK. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1739. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 KIND READER, 
 
 Encouraged by thy former generosity, I 
 once more present thee with an almanack, 
 which is the yth of my publication. While 
 thou art putting pence in my pocket, and fur 
 nishing my cottage with necessaries, Poor Dick 
 is not unmindful to do something for thy bene 
 fit. The stars are watch d as narrowly as old Bess 
 watch d her daughter that thou may st be ac 
 quainted with their motions, and told a tale of 
 their influences and effects, which may do thee 
 more good than a dream of last year s snow. 
 
 Ignorant men wonder how we astrologers 
 foretell the weather so exactly unless we deal 
 with the old black devil. Alas ! t is as easy 
 
 as . For instance ; The stargazer 
 
 peeps at the heavens thro a long glass : He 
 sees perhaps TAURUS or the great bull, in a 
 
88 jpoor IRicbarD tor 1739 
 
 mighty chase, stamping on the floor of his 
 house, swinging his tail about, stretching out 
 his neck, and opening wide his mouth. T is 
 natural from these appearances to judge that 
 this furious bull is puffing, blowing and roar 
 ing. Distance being considered and time al- 
 low d for all this to come down, there you 
 have wind and thunder. He spies perhaps 
 Virgo (or the virgin) she turns her head round 
 as it were to see if anybody observ d her ; then 
 crouching down gently, with her hands on her 
 knees, she looks wistfully for a while right for 
 ward. He judges rightly what she s about : 
 and having calculated the distance and allow d 
 time for its falling, finds that next spring we 
 shall have a fine April shower. What can be 
 more natural and easy than this ? I might in 
 stance the like in many other particulars ; but 
 this may be sufficient to prevent our being 
 taken for conjurors. O, the wonderful knowl 
 edge to be found in the stars ! Even the small 
 est things are written there, if you had but skill 
 to read. When my brother J m n erected a 
 scheme to know which was best for his sick 
 horse, to sup a new-laid egg, or a little broth, 
 he found that the stars gave their verdict for 
 broth, and the horse having sup d his broth ; 
 
 Now, what do you think became 
 
 of that horse ? You shall know in my next. 
 
poor IRtcbaro for 1739 89 
 
 Besides the usual things expected in an alma 
 nack, I hope the profess d teachers of mankind 
 will excuse my scattering here and there some 
 instructive hints in matters of morality and re 
 ligion. And be not thou disturbed, O grave 
 and sober reader, if among the many serious 
 sentences of my book, thou findest me trifling 
 now and then and talking idly. In all the 
 dishes I have hitherto cooked for thee, there 
 is solid meat enough for thy money. There are 
 scraps from the table of wisdom, that will if 
 well digested yield strong nourishment to thy 
 mind. But squeamish stomachs cannot eat 
 without pickles ; which t is true are good for 
 nothing else, but they provoke an appetite. 
 The vain youth that reads my almanack for 
 the sake of an idle joke, will perhaps meet 
 with a serious reflection, that he may ever 
 after be the better for. 
 
 Some people observing the great yearly de 
 mand for my almanack, imagine I must by this 
 time have become rich, and consequently ought 
 to call myself Poor Dick no longer. But, the 
 case is this, when I first begun to publish, the 
 printer made a fair agreement with me for my 
 copies, by virtue of which he runs away with 
 the greatest part of the profits. However, much 
 good may t do him ; I do not grudge it him ; 
 he is a man I have a great regard for, and wish 
 
9 poor IRicbarD for 1739 
 
 his profit ten times greater than it is. For I am, 
 dear reader, his, as well as thy 
 
 Affectionate friend, 
 
 R. SAUNDERS. 
 
 Very good LAMPBLACK, made and sold by 
 the printer hereof. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Giles Jolt, as sleeping in his cart he lay, 
 
 Some pilfering villains stole his team away ; 
 
 Giles wakes and cries, What s here ? a dickens, what ? 
 
 Why, how now ? Am I Giles ? or am I not ? 
 
 If he, I ve lost six geldings, to my smart ; 
 
 If not, odds buddikins, I ve found a cart. 
 
 When death puts out our flame, the snuff will tell 
 If we are wax, or tallow by the smell. 
 At a great penny worth, pause a while. 
 As to his wife, John minds St. Paul, he s one that hath 
 i wife, and is as if he d none. 
 Kings and bears often worry their keepers. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 1,0 rd if our days be few, why do we spend, 
 
 And lavish them to such an evil end ? 
 
 Or why if they be evil, do we wrong 
 
 Ourselves and thee, in wishing them so long ? 
 
 Our days decrease, our evils still renew, 
 
 We make them ill, thou kindly mak st them few. 
 
 If thou would st live long, live well ; for folly and 
 wickedness shorten life. 
 Trust thyself, and another shall not betray thee. 
 
poor IRtcbarfc for 1739 9 1 
 
 Thus with kind words, squire Edward cheer d his friend ; 
 
 Dear Dick ! thou on my friendship may st depend ; 
 
 I know thy fortune is but very scant ; 
 
 But, be assur d, I 11 ne er see Dick in want. 
 
 Dick s soon confin d, his friend no doubt would free 
 
 him : 
 His word he kept, in want he ne er would see him. 
 
 He that pays for work before it s done, has but a pen 
 ny worth for two pence. 
 
 Historians relate, not so much what is done, as what 
 they would have believed. 
 
 O malster ! break that cheating peck ; t is plain, 
 
 Whene er you use it you re a knave in Grain. 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 For s country Codrus suffer d by the sword, 
 And, by his death, his country s fame restor d ; 
 Caesar into his mother s boGcr.i bare 
 Fire, sword, and all the ills of civil war : 
 Codrus confirm d his country s wholesome laws ; 
 Ceesar in blood still justified his cause ; 
 Yet following kinrjs iic cr dopted Codrus name, 
 But C&sar, still, and emperor s the same. 
 
 Doll learning propria quce maribus without book, 
 I^ike nomen crescent is genitivo doth look. 
 Grace thou thy house, -and let not that grace thee. 
 Thou cans t not joke an enemy into a friend, but thou 
 may st a friend into an enemy. 
 Eyes and Priests, Bear no tests. 
 
 MAY. 
 
 Think bright Florella, when you see, 
 The constant changes of the year, 
 
92 poor IRicbaro for 1730 
 
 That nothing is from ruin free, 
 The gayest things must disappear. 
 Think of your beauties in their bloom, 
 The spring of sprightly youth improve ; 
 For cruel age, alas, will come, 
 And then t will be too late to love. 
 
 He that, falls in love with himself, will have no rivals. 
 Ivet thy child s first lesson be obedience, and the sec 
 ond will be what thou wilt. 
 
 Blessed is he that expects nothing, for he shall never 
 be disappointed. 
 
 Rather go to bed supperless than run in debt for a 
 breakfast. 
 
 JUNE. 
 On his late deafness. 
 
 Deaf, giddy, helpless, left alone, 
 To all my friends a burthen grown, 
 No more I hear a great church bell, 
 Than if it rung out for my knell : 
 At thunder now no more I start, 
 
 Than at the whispering of 
 
 Nay what s incredible, alack ! 
 I hardly hear my Bridget s clack. 
 
 I<et thy discontents be secrets. 
 
 A man of knowledge like a rich soil, feeds 
 
 If not a world of corn, a world of weeds. 
 
 An infallible remedy for toothache, viz. Wash the root 
 of an aching tooth, in Elder -vinegar, and let it dry half 
 an hour in the sun ; after which it will never ache more. 
 
 JTJLY. 
 
 Says George to William Neighbour, have a care, 
 Touch not that tree t is sacred to despair , 
 
fcoor RfcbarD for 1730 03 
 
 Two wives I had, but, ah ! that joy is past ! 
 
 Who breath d upon those fatal boughs their last. 
 
 The best in all the row, without dispute, 
 
 Says Will Would mine but bear such precious fruit ! 
 
 When next you prune your orchard, save for me 
 
 {I have a spouse) one cyon of that tree. 
 
 A modern wit is one of David s fools. 
 No resolution of repenting hereafter, can be sincere. 
 Pollio who values nothing that s within, 
 Buys books as men hunt beavers for their skin. 
 Honour thy father and mother, i. e. I^ive so as to be an 
 honour to them tho they are dead. 
 
 Ships sailing down Delaware bay this month, 
 shall hear at ten leagues distance, a confused 
 rattling noise, like a shower of hail upon a cake 
 of ice. Don t be frighted good passengers ! the 
 sailors can inform you, that it is nothing but 
 lower county teeth in the ague. In a southerly 
 wind you may hear it in Philadelphia. 
 
 Witness G. L. M. cum multis aliis. 
 
 If thou injurest conscience, it will have Its revenge on 
 thee. 
 
 Hear no ill of a friend, nor speak any of an enemy. 
 
 Pay what you owe, and you 11 know what is your own. 
 
 Be not niggardly of what costs thee nothing, as COUP 
 t*y, counsel, and countenance. 
 
 Thirst after desert not reward. 
 
94 poor IRfcbarfc for 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 The sun now clear, serene the golden skies, 
 Where er you go, fast the shadow flies ; 
 A cloud succeeds ; the sunshine now is o er, 
 The fleeting phantom fled, is seen no more ; 
 With your bright day, its progress too does end : 
 See here, vain man ! the picture of thy friend. 
 
 Beware of him that is slow to anger : He is angry foi 
 something, and will not be pleased for nothing. 
 
 No longer virtuous, no longer free, is a maxim as true 
 with regard to a private person as a commonwealth. 
 
 When man and woman die, as poets sung, 
 
 His heart s the last part moves, her last, the tongue 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 What legions of fables and whimsical tales 
 Ptss current for gospel where priestcraft prevails 1 
 Our ancestors were thus most strangely deceiv d, 
 What stories and nonsense for truth they believ d. 
 But we their wise sons, who these fables reject, 
 Kv n truth now-a-days, are too apt to suspect ; 
 From believing too much, the right faith we let fall ; 
 So now we believe, troth, nothing at all. 
 
 Proclaim not all thou knowest, all thou owest, all thou 
 hast, nor all thou can st. 
 
 I,et our fathers and grandfathers be valued for thei 
 goodness, ourselves for our own. 
 
 Industry need not wish. 
 
 Sin is not hurtful because it is forbidden, but it la for 
 bidden because it is hurtful. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Pinchall, possessing heaps of wealth, 
 Ivives miserably Door 
 
 
fioot IRfcbarD for 1739 95 
 
 He says t is to preserve his health, 
 
 But means by it his store. 
 I^et Freeman but the world invite 
 
 To dine on good cheer gratis, 
 Then he will gorge like half-starved wight 
 
 And cram his nunquam satis. 
 
 Nor is a duty beneficial because it is commanded, but 
 it is commanded because it is beneficial. 
 A ... they say has wit ; for what ? 
 
 For writing? No, for writing not. 
 
 George came to the crown without striking a blow, 
 Ah ! quoth the Pretender, would I could do so. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 In travel, pilgrims oft do ask to know 
 
 What miles they ve gone, and what they have to go ; 
 
 The way is tedious, and their limbs opprest, 
 
 And their desire is to be at rest. 
 
 In life s more tedious journey, man delays 
 
 T enquire out the number of his days : 
 
 He cares, not he, how slow his hours spend, 
 
 The journey s better than the journey s end. 
 
 O I/azy bones ! Dost thou think God would have given 
 thee arms and legs, if he had not design d thou should st 
 use them. 
 
 On the Law. Nigh neighbour to the squire, poor Sam 
 
 complain d 
 
 Of frequent wrongs, but no amends he gain d. 
 I$ach day his gates thrown down ; his fences broke, 
 And injur d still the more, the more he spoke ; 
 At last, resolv d his potent foe to awe, 
 A suit against him he began in law ; 
 Nine happy terms thro all the forms he run, 
 Obtain d his cause had costs and was undone. 
 
96 ipoor IRicbart) for 1730 
 
 A cure for poetry. Seven wealthy towns contend fol 
 Homer dead, 
 
 Thro which the living Homer beg d his bread. 
 
 Great beauty, great strength, and great riches are 
 really and truly of no great use ; a right heart exceeds 
 all. 
 
 A TRUE PROGNOSTICATION FOR 1739. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 Having consider d the infinite abuses arising 
 from the false prognostications published among 
 you, made under the shadow of a pot of drink, 
 or, so, I have here calculated one of the most 
 sure and unerring that ever was seen in black 
 and white, as hereafter you 11 find. For doubt 
 less it is a heinous, foul and crying sin, to 
 deceive the poor gaping world, greedy of the 
 knowledge of futurity as we Americans all are. 
 
 Take notice by the by, that having been at a 
 great deal of pains in the calculation, if you 
 don t believe every syllable, jot and tittle of it, 
 you do me a great deal of wrong; for which 
 either here or elsewhere, you may chance to be 
 claw d off with a vengeance. A good cowskin, 
 crabtree, or bull s pizzle may be plentifully be- 
 stow d on your outward man. You may snuff 
 up your noses as much as you please, t is all 
 one for that. 
 
 Well, however, come, smite your noses my 
 little children ; pull out your best eyes, on wi 
 
fcoor Ifltcbarfc for 1730 97 
 
 your barnacles, and carefully observe every 
 scruple of what I m going to tell you. 
 
 Of the GOLDEN NUMBER. 
 
 The Golden number, non est inventus, I can 
 not find it this year by any calculation I have 
 made. I must content myself with a number 
 of copper. No matter, go on. 
 
 Of the ECUPSES this year. 
 
 There are so many invisible eclipses this 
 year, that I fear, not unjustly, our pockets will 
 suffer inanition, be full empty, and our feeling 
 at a loss. During the first visible eclipse Saturn 
 is retrograde : For which reason the crabs will 
 go sidelong, and the ropemakers backward. 
 
 The belly will wag before, and the shall 
 
 sit down first Mercury will have his share in 
 these affairs, and so confound the speech of the 
 people, that when a Pennsylvanian would say 
 PANTHER he shall say PAINTER. When a New 
 Yorker thinks to say THIS he shall say DISS, 
 and the people in New England and Cape May 
 will not be able to say cow for their lives, but 
 will be forc d to say KEOW by a certain involun 
 tary twist in the root of their tongues. No 
 Connecticut man, nor Marylander will be able 
 to open his mouth this year, but SIR shall ba 
 the first or last syllable he pronounces, and 
 
98 fcoor tticbart for 1739 
 
 sometimes both. Brutes shall speak in many 
 places, and there will be above seven and twenty 
 irregular verbs made this year, if Grammar 
 don t interpose. But who can help these mis 
 fortunes. 
 
 Of the DISEASES this year. 
 
 This year the stone-blind shall see but very 
 little ; the deaf shall hear but poorly ; and the 
 dumb sha n t speak very plain. And it s much, 
 if my Dame Bridget talks at all this year. 
 Whole flocks, herds, and droves of sheep, swine 
 and oxen, cocks and hens, ducks and drakes, 
 geese and ganders shall go to pot ; but the 
 mortality will not be altogether so great among 
 cats, dogs and horses. As to old age t will be 
 incurable this year, because of the years past. 
 And towards the fall some people will be seiz d 
 with an unaccountable inclination to roast and 
 eat their own ears : Should this be call d mad 
 ness, Doctors? I think not. But the worst 
 disease of all will be a certain most horrid, 
 dreadful, malignant, catching, perverse and 
 odious malady, almost epidemical, insomuch 
 that many shall run mad upon it ; I quake for 
 very fear when I think on t ; for I assure you 
 very few will escape this disease ; which is 
 called by the learned Albromazar Lacko mony, 
 
poor IRfcbarfc for 1730 99 
 
 Of the FRUITS of the EARTH. 
 
 I find that this will be a plentiful year of all 
 manner of good things, to those who have 
 enough ; but the orange trees in Greenland 
 will go near to fare the worse for the cold. 
 As to oats, they 11 be a great help to horses. I 
 dare say there won t be much more bacon than 
 swine. Mercury somewhat threatens our pars 
 ley beds, yet parsley will be to be had for 
 money. Hemp will grow faster than the chil 
 dren of this age, and some will find there J s too 
 much on t. As for corn, fruit, cyder and 
 turnips, there never was such plenty as will be 
 now ; if poor folks may have their wish. 
 
 Of the CONDITION of some countries. 
 
 an universal droughth this yeal 
 thro all the northern colonies. Hence there 
 will be dry rice in Carolina, dry tobacco in 
 Virginia and Maryland, dry bread in Pennsyl 
 vania and New York ; and in New England 
 dry fish and dry doctrine. Dry throats will be 
 every where ; but then how pleasant it will be 
 to drink cool cyder ! tho some will tell you 
 nothing is more contrary to thirst. I believe it, 
 and indeed, contraria t contrariis curantur. 
 
 R. SAUNDERS. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1740. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 October 7, 1739. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 You may remember that in my first Alman 
 ack, published for the year 1733, 1 predicted the 
 death of my dear friend, Titan Leeds, Philomat, 
 to happen that year on the iyth day of October, 
 3 h. 29 m. p. M. The good man, it seems, died 
 accordingly. ButW. B. and A. B. [*]have con 
 tinued to publish Almanacks in his name evei 
 since ; asserting for some years that he was still 
 living ; At length when the truth could no 
 longer be concealed from the world, they con 
 fess his death in their Almanack for 1739, but 
 pretend that he died not till last year, .and that 
 before his departure he had furnished them 
 with calculations for 7 years to come. Ah, my 
 friends, these are poor shifts and thin dis- 
 
 * William and Andrew Bradford, printers in Nev 
 York and Philadelphia. 
 
poor IRfcbarD for 1740 101 
 
 guises ; of which indeed 1* sl-ofOd have v fait eh 
 little or no notice, i f you had not at the sdme 
 time accused me as a f4tee predictor-; an e.sp^r- 
 sion that the more affects" me, a$ my whole 
 livelyhood depends on a contrary character. 
 
 But to put this matter beyond dispute, I shall 
 acquaint the world with a fact, as strange and 
 surprising as it is true ; being as follows, viz. 
 
 On the 4th instant, towards midnight as I sat 
 in my little study writing this Preface, I fell fast 
 asleep ; and continued in that condition for 
 some time, without dreaming any thing, to my 
 knowledge. On awaking, I found lying before 
 me the following, viz. 
 
 Dear Friend SAUNDERS, 
 
 My respect for you continues even in this 
 separate state, and I am grieved to see the asper 
 sions thrown on you by the malevolence of 
 avaricious publishers of Almanacks, who envy 
 your success. They say your prediction of my 
 death in 1733 was false, and they pretend that 1 
 remained alive many years after. But I do 
 hereby certify, that I did actually die at that 
 time, precisely at the hour you mentioned, with 
 a variation only of 5 min. 53 sec. which must be 
 allowed to be no great matter in such cases. 
 And I do further declare that I furnished them 
 with no calculations of the planets motions, &c, 
 
102 poor IRfcbarD for 1740 
 
 s"e\ 2ti years after mJF,dedih, as they are pleasea 
 to give out : so that ihe stuffMiey publish as an 
 Almanack in rn*> riams is no more mine than 
 tizyourc. 
 
 You will wonder perhaps, how this paper 
 comes written on your table. You must know 
 that no separate spirits are under any confine 
 ment till after the final settlement of all ac 
 counts. In the meantime we wander where we 
 please, visit our old friends, observe their ac 
 tions, enter sometimes into their imaginations, 
 and give them hints waking or sleeping that may 
 be of advantage to them. Finding you asleep, 
 I entered your left nostril, ascended into your 
 brain, found out where the ends of those nerves 
 were fastened that move your right hand and 
 fingers, by the help of which I am now writing 
 unknown to you ; but when you open your eyes 
 you will see that the hand written is mine, tho? 
 wrote with yours. 
 
 The people of this infidel age, perhaps^ will 
 hardly believe this story. But you may give 
 them these three signs by which they shall be 
 convinced of the truth of it. About the middle 
 
 of June next, J. J n, Philomat, shall be 
 
 openly reconciled to the Church of Rome, and 
 give all his goods and chattels to the chappel, 
 being perverted by a certain country school 
 master. On the *]th of September following my 
 
ftoor IRicbarfc for 1740 103 
 
 old Friend W. B t shall be sober 9 hours, 
 
 to the astonishment of all his neighbours : 
 And about the same time W. B. and A. B. will 
 publish another Almanack in my name, in 
 spight of truth and common sense. 
 
 As I can see much clearer into futurity , since 
 I got free from the dark prison of flesh, in 
 which I was continually molested and almost 
 blinded with fogs arising from tiff, and the 
 smoke of burnt drams ; I shall in kindness to 
 you, frequently give you information of things 
 to come, for the improvement of your Alma 
 nack : being, Dear Dick, Your Affectionate 
 Friend, 
 
 T. LEEDS. 
 
 For my own part I am convinced that the 
 above letter is genuine. If the reader doubts of 
 it, let him carefully observe the three signs ; 
 and if they do not actually come to pass, believe 
 as he pleases. 
 
 I am his humble Friend, 
 
 R. SAUNDERS. 
 
 OF THE ECUPSES FOR 1740. 
 
 There will be six Bclipses this year, &c. &c. 
 &c. Some of these Eclipses foreshow great grief 
 and many tears among the soft sex this year ; 
 whether for the breaking of their crockery ware, 
 
io4 poor IRicbarD for 1740 
 
 the loss of their loves, or in repentance fortheii 
 sins, I shall not say : tho I must own I think 
 there will be a great deal of the latter in the 
 case. War we shall hear but too much of (for 
 all Christians have not yet learn d to love one 
 another}^ and, I doubt, of some ineffectual 
 treaties of peace. I pray Heav n defend these 
 Colonies from every enemy ; and give them 
 bread enough, peace enough, money enough, 
 and plenty of good cyder. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 My sickly spouse, with many a sigh 
 
 Once told me, Dicky, I shall die : 
 
 I griev d, but recollected strait, 
 
 T was bootless to contend with fate : 
 
 So resignation to Heaven s will 
 
 Prepar d me for succeeding ill ; 
 
 T was well it did ; for on my life, 
 
 T was Heav n s will to spare my wife. 
 
 To bear other people s afflictions, every one has 
 courage and enough to spare. 
 
 No wonder Tom grows fat, th unwieldy sinner, makes 
 his whole life but one continual dinner. 
 
 An empty bag cannot stand upright. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 While the good priest with eyes devoutly clos d, 
 lyeft on the book the marriage fee expos d, 
 The new made bridegroom his occasion spies, 
 And pleas d, repocket .; rp the shining- prize ; 
 
Ipoor IRicbarD for 1740 105 
 
 Yet not so safe, but Mr. Surplice views 
 
 The/ro/z c, and demands his pilfer d dues. 
 
 No, quoth the man, good Doctor, I 11 non suit y . 
 
 A plain default, I found you off your duty ? 
 
 More carefully the holy book survey : 
 
 Your rule is, you should watch as well as pray. 
 
 Happy that Nation, -fortunate that age, whose history 
 is not diverting. 
 
 What is a Butterfly ? at best he s but a catterpillai 
 drest. The gaudy Fop s his picture just. 
 
 None are deceived, but they that confide. 
 
 When Pharoak s sins provok d th Almighty s hand, 
 
 To pour his wrath upon the guilty land ; 
 
 A ten fold plague the great avenger shed, 
 
 The King offended, and the nation bled. 
 
 Hads tthou, unaided, Feria, but been sent, 
 
 Vial elect, for Pharoah s punishment. 
 
 Thro what a various curse the wretch had run, 
 
 He more than Heaven s ten plagues had felt in one. 
 
 An open foe may prove a curse ; 
 
 But a pretended friend is worse. 
 
 A Wolf eats sheep but now and then, 
 
 Ten Thousands are devour d by men. 
 
 Man s tongue is soft, and bone doth lack ; 
 
 Yet a stroke therewith may break a man s back. 
 
 Says Roger to his wife, my dear ; 
 The strangest piece of news I hear ! 
 A law, t is said, will quickly pass 
 To purge the matrimonial cla ; 
 
io6 poor IRtcbarD for 1740 
 
 Cuckolds, if any such we have here, 
 Must to a man be thrown i the river. 
 She smiling cry d, My dear, you seem 
 Surpriz d ! Pray han t you learn dto swim 
 
 Many a meal is lost for want of meat 
 To all apparent beauties blind 
 Each blemish strikes an envious mind. 
 The poor have little, beggars none ; 
 The rich too much enough not one. 
 
 MAY. 
 
 A. carrier every night and morn 
 
 Would see his horses eat their corn : 
 
 This sunk the hostler s vails, t is true, 
 
 But then his horses had their due. 
 
 Were we so cautious in all cases, 
 
 Small gain would rise from greater places. 
 
 There are lazy minds as well as lazy bodies. 
 
 Tricks and trechery are the practice of fools that have 
 not wit enough to be honest. 
 
 Who says Jack is not generous? he is always fond 
 
 of giving, and cares not for receiving, what ? why, 
 
 advice. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 How weak, how vain is human pride I 
 Dares man upon himself confide ? 
 The wretch who glories in his gain 
 Amasses heaps on heaps in vain. 
 Can those (when tortur d by disease) 
 Cheer our sick heart, or purchase ease ? 
 Can those prolong one gasp of breath. 
 Qr calm the troubled hour of death ? 
 
fcoor IRtcbarD for 1740 107 
 
 The Man who with undaunted toils, 
 Sails unknown seas to unknown soils, 
 With various wonders feasts his sight : 
 What stranger wonders does he write ? 
 
 Fear not death ; for the sooner we die, the longer shall 
 we be immortal. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 The monarch of long regal line, 
 Was rais d from dust as frail as mine : 
 Can he pour health into his veins, 
 Or cool the fever s restless pains ? 
 Can he (worn down in nature s course) 
 New-brace his feeble nerves with force ? 
 Can he (how vain is mortal pow r !) 
 Stretch life beyond the destin d hour ? 
 
 Those who in quarrels interpose, 
 Must often wipe a bloody nose. 
 
 Promises may get thee friends, but non-performance 
 will turn them into enemies. 
 
 In other men we faults can spy, 
 And blame the mote that dims their eye ; 
 Hach little speck and blemish find ; 
 To our own stronger errors blind. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 The man of pure and simple heart 
 
 Thro life disdains a double part, 
 
 He never needs the screen 
 
 His inward bosom to disguise. 
 
 In vain malicious tongues assail. 
 
 I/et envy snarl, let slander rail, 
 
 From virtue s shield (secure from wound) 
 
 Their blunted venom d shafts rebound. 
 
io8 {poor IRicbarO for 1740 
 
 When you speak to a man, look on his eyes ; when he 
 speaks to thee, look on his mouth. 
 
 Jane, why those tears? why droops your head? 
 Is then your other husband dead ? 
 Or, doth a worse disgrace betide ? 
 Hath no one since his death apply d ? 
 
 Observe all men ; thyself most. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 We frequently misplace esteem 
 
 By judging men by what they seem. 
 
 With partial eyes we re apt to see, 
 
 The man of noble pedigree. 
 
 To birth, wealth, power, we should allow 
 
 Precedence, and our lowest bow : 
 
 In that is due distinction shown ; 
 
 Esteem is Virtue s right alone. 
 
 Thou hadst better eat salt with the philosophers of 
 Greece, than sugar with the courtiers of Italy. 
 
 Seek Virtue, and of that possest, 
 
 To Providence resign the rest. 
 
 Marry above thy match, and thou It get a master. 
 
 Fear to do ill, and you need fear nought else. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 What s beauty ? Call ye that your own, 
 A flow r that fades as soon as blown ! 
 Those eyes of so divine a ray, 
 What are they ? Mould ring, mortal clay; 
 Those features cast in heav nly mould, 
 Shall, like my coarser earth, grow old ; 
 I,ike common grass, the fairest flow r 
 Must feel the hoary season s power. 
 
1Rlcbar> for 1740 109 
 
 He makes a foe, who makes a jest. 
 
 Can grave and formal pass for wise 
 
 When men the solemn owl despise ? 
 
 Some are justly laught at for keeping their money 
 foolishly, others for spending it idly : He is the great 
 est fool that lays it out in a purchase of repentance. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Old Socrates was obstinately good, 
 Virtuous by force, by inclination lewd. 
 When secret movements drew his soul aside, 
 He quelPd his lust, and stemm d the swelling tide ; 
 Sustain d by reason still, unmov d he stood, 
 And steady bore against th opposing flood. 
 He durst correct what nature form d amiss, 
 And forc d unwilling virtue to be his. 
 
 Who knows a fool, must know his brother ; 
 For one will recommend another. 
 Avoid dishonest gain : no price, 
 Can recompence the pangs of vice. 
 When befriended, remember it : 
 When you befriend, forget it. 
 Great souls with generous pity melt ; 
 Which coward tyrants never felt. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 O blessed season ! lov d by saints and sinners, 
 For long devotions, or for longer dinners ; 
 More grateful still to those who deal in books, 
 Now not with readers, but with pastry cooks : 
 I^earn d works, despis d by those to merit blind, 
 By these well weigh d, their certain value find. 
 Bless d lot of paper, falsely called waste, 
 To bear those cates which authors seldom taste. 
 
no poor IRtcbarfc for 1740 
 
 Employ thy time well, if thou meanest to gain leisure. 
 
 A flatterer never seems absurd : 
 
 The flatter d always takes his word. 
 
 Ivend money to an enemy, and thou it gain him ; to a 
 friend, and thou It lose him. 
 
 Neither praise nor dispraise, till seven Christmasses be 
 over. 
 
 COURTS. 
 
 I know you lawyers can, with ease, 
 Twist words and meaning s as you please ; 
 That language, by your skill made pliant, 
 Will bend to favour every client ; 
 That t is the fee directs the sense 
 To make out either side s pretence : 
 When you peruse the clearest case, 
 You see it with a double face, 
 For scepticism s your profession ; 
 You hold there s doubt in all expression. 
 
 Hence is the Bar with fees supplied, 
 Hence eloquence takes either side. 
 Your hand would have but paltry gleaning 
 Could every man express his meaning. 
 Who dares presume to pen a deed, 
 Unless you previously are fee d ? 
 T is drawn, and, to augment ths cost t 
 In dull prolixity engrost : 
 And now we re well secur d by law, 
 Till the next brother Jind a flaw. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1741. 
 
 [PREFACE OMITTED.] 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Your homely face, Flippanta, you disguise 
 
 With patches, numerous as Argus eyes : 
 
 I own that patching s requisite for you : 
 
 For more we re pleas d, if less your face we view : 
 
 Yet I advise, if my advice you d ask, 
 
 Wear but one patch : but be that patch a mask. 
 
 Enjoy the present hour, be mindful of the past ; 
 And neither fear nor wish the approaches of the last. 
 I^earn of the skilful : He that teaches himself, hath a 
 fool for his master. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 The cringing train of pow r survey ; 
 What creatures are so low as they ! 
 With what obsequiousness they bend 1 
 To what vile actions condescend ! 
 Their rise is in their meanness built, 
 And flatt ry is their smallest guilt. 
 
 Best is the tongue that feels the rein ; 
 He that talks much, talks in vain ; 
 We from the wordy torrent fly : 
 Who listens to the chattering Pye? 
 
 Ill 
 
ifroor 1Rtcbar> for 1741 
 
 Think Cato sees thee. 
 No wood without bark. 
 
 IJnrag d was Buckram, when his wife he beat, 
 That she d so often, lousy knave repeat. 
 At length he seized and drag d her to the well, 
 I 11 cool thy tongue, or I 11 thy courage quell. 
 Ducking, thy case, poor Buckram, little mends; 
 She had her lesson at her fingers ends. 
 Sows d over head, her arms she raises high ; 
 And cracking nails the want of tongue supply. 
 
 Monkeys, warm with envious spite, 
 Their most obliging friends will bite : 
 And fond to copy human ways, 
 Practice new mischiefs all their days. 
 Joke went out and brought home his fellow, and they 
 two began a quarrel. 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 Rash mortals, e er you take a wife, 
 Contrive your pile to last for life : 
 On sense and worth your passion found, 
 By decency cemented round ; 
 I^et prudence with good-nature strive, 
 To keep esteem and love alive ; 
 Then, come old age whene er it will, 
 Your friendship shall continue still. 
 
 I,et thy discontents be thy secrets ; if the world knows 
 them t will despise thee and increase them. 
 
 E) er you remark another s sin, 
 
 Bid your own conscience look within. 
 
 Anger and folly walk cheek by jole ; repentance treads 
 on both their heels. 
 
Uttcbarfc tor 1741 113 
 
 Fair decency, celestial maid, 
 Descend from Heav n to beauty s aid : 
 Tho beauty may beget desire, 
 T is thou must fan the lover s fire : 
 For beauty, like supreme dominion, 
 Is but supported by opinion : 
 If decency bring no supplies, 
 Opinion falls and beauty dies. 
 
 Turn Turk, Tim, and renounce thy faith in words as 
 well as actions : Is it worse to follow Mahomet than the 
 Devil ? 
 
 Don t overload gratitude ; if you do, she 11 kick. 
 
 Be always ashamed to catch thyself idle. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 When painful Colin in his grave was laid, 
 
 His mournful wife this lamentation made : 
 
 I ve lost, alas ! (poor wretch, what must I do?) 
 
 The best of friends, and best of husbands too. 
 
 Thus of all joy and happiness bereft : 
 
 And with the charge often poor children left ; 
 
 A greater grief no woman sure can know. 
 
 Who (with ten children) who will have me now? 
 
 Where yet was ever found the mother, 
 
 Who d change her booby for another? 
 
 At 20 years of age the will reigns ; at 30 the wit ; at 40 
 the judgment. 
 
 Christianity commands us to pass by injuries ; policy, 
 to let them pass by us. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Nature expects mankind should share 
 The duties of the oublick care. 
 
ii4 fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1741 
 
 Who s born for sloth ? To some we find 
 The plough- share s annual toil assigned ; 
 Some at the sounding anvil glow ; 
 Some the swift gliding shuttle throw ; 
 Some, studious of the wind and tide, 
 From pole to pole our commerce guide, 
 
 laying rides upon debt s back. 
 
 They who have nothing to be troubled at, will be 
 troubled at nothing. 
 
 Wife, from thy spouse each blemish hide, 
 More than from all the world beside!: 
 I^et DECENCY be all thy pride. 
 
 Some (taught by industry) impart 
 With hands and feet the works of art ; 
 While some, of genius more refined, 
 With head and tongues assist mankind ; 
 Each aiming at one common end 
 Proves to the whole a needful friend. 
 Thus, born each other s useful aid, 
 By turns are obligations paid. 
 
 Nick s passions grow fat and hearty : his understand 
 ing looks consumptive ! 
 
 If evils come not, then our fears are vain ; 
 
 And if they do, fear but augments the pain. 
 
 If you would keep your secret from an enemy, tell it 
 lot to a friend. 
 
 Rob not for burnt offerings. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 The Monarch, when his table s spread, 
 To th farmer is oblig d for bread ; 
 
poor IRfcbarfc for 1741 us 
 
 And when in all his glory drest, 
 Owes to the loom his royal vest ; 
 Do not the mason s toil and care 
 Protect him from th inclement air? 
 Does not the cutler s art supply 
 The ornament that guards his thigh? 
 
 Bess brags she s a beauty, and can prove the same : 
 
 As how ? Why thus, sir, t is her puppy s name. 
 
 Up, sluggard, and waste not life ; in the grave will be 
 sleeping enough. 
 
 Well done, is twice done. 
 
 Clearly spoken, Mr. Fogg ! You explain English by 
 Greek. 
 
 All these in duty, to the throne 
 Their common obligations own. 
 T is he (his own and people s cause) 
 Protects their properties and laws : 
 Thus they their honest toil employ, 
 And with content the fruits enjoy, 
 In every rank, or great or small, 
 T is INDUSTRY supports us all. 
 
 Formio bewails his sins with the same heart, 
 As friends do friends when they re about to part 
 Believe it, Formio will not entertain 
 One cheerful thought till they do meet again. 
 Honours change manners. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Syl. dreamt that bury d in his fellow clay, 
 Close by a common beggar s side he lay : 
 
n6 fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1741 
 
 And, as so mean a neighbour shock d his pride. 
 Thus, like a corpse of consequence, he cry d ; 
 Scoundrel , begone ; and henceforth touch me not 
 More manners learn ; and, at a distance, rot. 
 How ! scoundrel ! in a hautiertone cry d he ; 
 Proud lump of dirt, I scorn thy words and thee , 
 Here all are equal ; now thy case is mine ; 
 This is my rotting place, and that is thine. 
 
 Jack eating rotten cheese, did say, 
 I/ike Samson I my thousands slay : 
 I vow, quoth Roger, so you do. 
 And with the self-same weapon too. 
 There are no fools so troublesome as those that have 
 writ. 
 
 Quarrels never could last long, 
 If on one side only lay the wrong. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 On a Bee, stifled in honey. 
 
 From flower to flower, with eager pains, 
 
 See the poor busy lab rer fly ! 
 
 When all that from her toil she gains, 
 
 Is, in the sweets she hoards, to die. 
 
 T is thus, would man the truth believe, 
 
 With life s soft sweets, each fav rite joy : 
 
 If we taste wisely, they relieve ; 
 
 But if we plunge too deep, destroy. 
 
 I,et no pleasure tempt thee, no profit allure thee, no 
 ambition corrupt thee, no example sway thee, no persua 
 sion move thee, to do any thing which thou knowest to 
 be evil ; so shalt thou always live jollily : for a good con 
 science is a continual Christmas. Adieu. 
 
poor IRicbaro for 1741 "7 
 
 He that by injury is griev d, 
 
 And goes to law to be relieved, 
 
 Is sillier than a sottish chouse, 
 
 Who, when a thief has robb d his house, 
 
 Applies himself to cunning men 
 
 To help him to his goods again : 
 
 When, all he can expect to gain, 
 
 Is but to squander more in vain. 
 
 For lawyers, lest the Bear defendant, 
 
 And plaintiff Dog should make an end on t, 
 
 Do stave and tail with writs of error, 
 
 Reverse of judgment and demurrer, 
 
 To let them breathe a-while, and then, 
 
 Cry whoop, and set them on again ; 
 
 Until, with subtil cobweb cheats, 
 
 In which, when once they are embrangl d. 
 
 The more they stir the more they retangl d 
 
 For while their purses can dispute, 
 
 There s no end of th immortal suit. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1742, 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 This is the ninth year of my endeavours to 
 serve thee in the capacity of a calendar-writer. 
 The encouragement I have met with must be 
 ascribed in a great measure to your charity, ex 
 cited by the open, honest declaration I made 
 of my poverty at my first appearance. This my 
 brother Philomaths could, without being conju 
 rors, discover ; and Poor Richard s success has 
 produced ye a Poor Will, and a Poor Robin ; 
 and no doubt a Poor John , &c., will follow, and 
 we shall all be, in name, what some folks say 
 we are already in fact, a parcel of poor almanac 
 makers. During the course of these nine years, 
 what buffetings have I not sustained ! The 
 fraternity have been all in arms. Honest TUan t 
 .1x8 
 
poor IRtcbarfc for 1742 119 
 
 deceased, was raised, and made to abuse his old 
 friend. Both authors and printers were angry. 
 Hard names, and many were bestowed on me. 
 They denied me to be the author of my own 
 works ; declared there never was any such pen 
 son ; asserted that I was dead sixty years ago ; 
 prognosticated my death to happen within a 
 twelvemonth ; with many other malicious in 
 consistencies, the effects of blind passion, envy 
 at my success, and a vain hope of depriving me, 
 dear reader, of thy wonted countenance and 
 favor. Who knows him ? they cry ; where does 
 he live ? But what is that to them ? If I de 
 light in a private life, have they any right to 
 drag me out of my retirement ? T have good 
 reasons for concealing the place of my abode. 
 It is time for an old man, as I am, to think of 
 preparing for his great remove. The perpetual 
 teasing of both neighbours and strangers to cal 
 culate nativities, give judgement on schemes, 
 and erect figures, discover thieves, detect horse- 
 stealers, describe the route of runaways and 
 strayed cattle ; the crowd of visitors with a 
 thousand trifling questions, Will my ship re 
 turn safe ? Will my mare win the race ? Will 
 her next colt be a pacer ? When will my wife 
 die ? Who shall be my husband ? and HO W 
 LONG first? When is the best time to cut 
 hair, trim cocks, or sow salad? these and the 
 
i2o poor IRicbarD for 1742 
 
 like impertinences I have now neither taste nor 
 leisure for. I have had enough of them. All 
 that these angry folks can say will never pro 
 voke me to tell them where I live ; I would eat 
 my nails first. 
 
 My last adversary is/. J n, Philomat, who 
 
 declares and protests (in his preface, 1741) that 
 the false prophecy put in my Almanac, concern 
 ing him, the year before, is altogether false and 
 untrue, and that I am one of BaaVs false prophets. 
 This false, false prophecy he speaks of related 
 to his reconciliation with the Church of Rome ; 
 which notwithstanding his declaring and pro 
 testing, is, I fear, too true. Two things in his 
 elegiac verses confirm me in this suspicion. 
 He calls the first of November All-Hallows 
 Day. Reader, does it in the least savour of the 
 pure language of friends? But the plainest 
 thing is his adoration of saints, which he con 
 fesses to be his practice in these words, page 4, 
 
 " When any trouble did me befall, 
 To my dear Mary then I would call." 
 
 Did he think the whole world so stupid as not 
 to take notice of this ? So ignorant as not to 
 know that all Catholics pay the highest regard 
 to the Virgin Mary? Ah, friend John, we 
 must allow you to be a poet, but you are cer- 
 
poor IRfcbarD for 1742 121 
 
 tainly no Protestant. I could heartily wish 
 your religion were as good as your verses. 
 
 RICHARD SAUNDERS.* 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Foot, Horse and Waggons, now cross Rivers, dry, 
 And Ships unmov d, the boistrous Winds defy, 
 In frozen Climes : when all conceal d from Sight, 
 The pleasing Objects that to Verse invite ; 
 The Hills, the Dales, and the delightful Woods, 
 The flowry Plains, and Silver-streaming Floods, 
 By Snow disguis d, in bright Confusion lie, 
 And with one dazling Waste fatigue the Eye. 
 
 Strange ! that a Man who has wit enough to write a 
 Satyr ; should have folly enough to publish it. 
 He that hath a Trade, hath an Estate. 
 
 * In the preface of "The American Almanack" for 
 1743 John Jerman wrote : 
 
 " To the READERS, Here is presented to your View 
 and Service an Almanack for the Year 1743 according to 
 my yearly Method, so I hope it needs no Explanation. I 
 have put down the Judgment of the Weather as usual, 
 and as I find the Aspects and Positions of the Planets to 
 signifie ; but no Man can be infallible therein, by reason 
 of the many contrary Causes happening at or near the 
 same Time, and the inconstancy of the Summer Showers 
 find Gusts, being very often great Rain Hail and Thun 
 der in one Place, and none at all in another Place within 
 a few Miles distance. However, I think mine comes as 
 near the Matter as any other if not nearer. 
 
 The Reader may expect a Reply from me to R 
 
 5" rs alias B F ns facetious Way of proving me 
 
 no Protestant. I do hereby protest, that for that and such 
 kind of Usage the Pointer of that witty Performance 
 shall not have the Benefit of my Almanack for this Year. 
 To avoid further Contention, and judging it unnecessary 
 to offer any Proofs to those of my Acquaintance that I 
 am not a Papist, I shall with these few Ijnes conclude, 
 and give iplace. to what I think more agreeable to my 
 Readers. 
 
 JOHN JERMAN." 
 
122 poor iRtcbarfc for 1742 
 
 Have you somewhat to do to-morrow ; do it to-day. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 James ne er will be prefer d ; he cannot bow 
 And cringe beneath a supercilious Brow ; 
 He cannot fawn, his stubborn Soul recoils 
 At Baseness, for his Blood too highly boils. 
 A Courtier must be supple, full of Guile, 
 Must learn to praise, to flatter, to revile 
 The Good, the Bad ; an Knemy, a Friend ; 
 To give false hopes, and on false Hopes depend. 
 
 No workman without tools, 
 
 Nor lawyer without Fools, 
 
 Can live by their Rules. 
 
 The painful Preacher, like a candle bright, 
 
 Consumes himself in giving others L,ight. 
 
 Speak and speed : the close mouth catches no flies. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 As honest Hodge the Farmer sow d his Field, 
 Chear d with the Hope of future Gain t would yield, 
 Two upstart Jacks in Office, proud and vain, 
 Come riding by, and thus insult the Swain : 
 You drudge and sweat, and labour here, Old Boy, 
 But we the Fruit of your hard Toil enjoy. 
 Belike you may, q-toth Hodge, and but your Due, 
 For, Gentlemen, t is HEMP I m sowing now. 
 
 Visit your Aunt, but not every Day ; and call at you* 
 Brother s, but not every night. 
 Bis dat, qui cito dat.* 
 
 Money and good Manners make the Gentleman. 
 Late Children, early Orphans. 
 
 * He who gives promptly, gives twice as much. 
 
poor IRtcbarD tor 1742 123 
 
 The Winter spent, Joe feels the Poet s Fire, 
 The Sun advances, and the Fogs retire : 
 The genial Spring unbinds the frozen Earth, 
 Dawns on the trees, and gives the Prim-rose Birth. 
 I,oos d from their Friendly Harbours, once again, 
 Our floating Forts assemble on the Main ; 
 The Voice of War the gallant Soldier wakes ; 
 And weeping Cloe parting Kisses takes. 
 
 Ben beats his Pate, and fancy s wit will come ; 
 But he may knock, there s nobody at home. 
 The good Spinner hath a large Shift. 
 Tom, vain s your Pains ; They all will fail : 
 Ne er was good Arrow made of a Sow s Tail. 
 
 MAY. 
 
 What knowing Judgment, or what piercing Eye, 
 Can MAN S mysterious Maze of Falsehood try ? 
 Intriguing MAN, of a suspicious Mind, 
 MA N only knows the Cunning of his Kind ; 
 With equal Wit can counter- work his Foes, 
 And Art with Art, and Fraud with Fraud oppose. 
 Then heed ye FAIR, e er you their Cunning prove, 
 And think of Treach ry, while they talk of I,OVE. 
 
 Empty Freebooters, cover d with Scorn : 
 They went out for Health, & came ragged and torn, 
 As the Ram went for Wool, and was sent back shorn. 
 Ill Customs & bad Advice are seldom forgotten. 
 He that sows thorns, should not go barefoot. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Sometimes a Man speaks Truth without Design, 
 As late it happen "d with a Friend of mine. 
 
124 f>oor IRfctmrD for 1742 
 
 Two reVerend Preachers talking, one declar d, 
 That to preach twice each Sunday was full hard. 
 To you, perhaps (says t other), for I suppose, 
 That all Men don t with the same Ease compose : 
 But I, desiring still my Flock to profit, 
 Preach twice each Sunday, and make nothing of it. 
 
 Reniego de grilles, aunque Jean d aro.* 
 Men meet, mountains never. 
 
 When Knaves fall out, honest Men get their goods : 
 ,Vhen Priests dispute, we come at the Truth. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Man only from himself can suffer Wrong ; 
 His Reason fails as his Desires grow strong : 
 Hence, wanting Ballast, and too full of Sail, 
 He lies expos d to every rising Gale. 
 From Youth to Age, for Happiness he s bound ; 
 He splits on Rocks, or runs his Bark aground ; 
 Or, wide of I^and, a desart Ocean views, 
 And, to the last, the flying Port pursues. 
 
 Kate would have Thomas, no one blame her can : 
 Tom won t have Kate, and who can blame the Man ? 
 A large train makes a light Purse. 
 Death takes no bribes. 
 
 One good Husband is worth two good Wives ; for the 
 scarcer things are the more they re valued. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 The Busy-Man s Picture. 
 
 BUSINESS, thou Plague and Pleasure of my I^ife, 
 Thou charming Mistress, thou vexatious Wife ; 
 
 * Execrate fetters, notwithstanding Jean d Arc. 
 
fcoor IRtcbarfc for 1742 125 
 
 Thou Enemy, thou Friend, to Joy, to Grief, 
 Thou bring st rue all, and bring st me no Relief, 
 Thou bitter, sweet, thou pleasing, teazing Thing, 
 Thou Bee, that with thy Honey wears a Sting ; 
 Some Respite, prithee do, yet do not give, 
 I cannot with thee, nor without thee, live. 
 
 He that riseth late, must trot all day, and shall scarce 
 overtake his business at night. 
 He that speaks ill of the Mare, will buy her. 
 You may drive a gift without a gimblet. 
 Eat few Suppers, and you 11 need few Medecines. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 The Reverse. 
 
 Studious of Ease, and fond of humble Things, 
 Below the Smiles, below the Frowns of Kings : 
 Thanks to my Stars, I prize the Sweets of I/ife, 
 No sleepless Nights I count, no Days of Strife. 
 I rest, I wake, I drink, I sometimes love, 
 I read, I write, I settle, or I rove ; 
 Content to live, content to die unknown, 
 lyord of myself, accountable to none. 
 
 You will be careful, if you are wise ; How you touch 
 men s Religion, or Credit, or Eyes. 
 
 After Fish, 
 Milk do not wish. 
 
 Heb Ddnw heb ddim, a Dnw, a digon.* 
 They who have nothing to trouble them, will bf 
 troubled at nothing. 
 
 * Without God without ought, Gjd ind enough. 
 
126 poor IRtcbarfc for 1742 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 On him true HAPPINESS shall wait 
 Who shunning noisy Pomp and State 
 Those little Blessings of the Great 
 
 Consults the Golden Mean. 
 In prosp rous Gales with Care he steers, 
 Nor adverse Winds, dejected, fears, 
 In ev ry Turn of Fortune bears 
 
 A Face and Mind serene. 
 
 Against Diseases here, the strongest Fence, 
 
 Is the defensive Virtue, Abstinence. 
 
 Fient de chien & marc d argent, 
 
 Seront tout un au jour du jugement.* 
 
 If thou dost ill, the joy fades, not the pains ; 
 
 If well, the pain doth fade, the joy remains. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Celia s rich Side-board seldom sees the I/ight, 
 Clean is her Kitchen, and her Spits are bright ; 
 Her Knives and Spoons, all rang d in even Rows, 
 No Hands molest, nor Fingers discompose : 
 A curious Jack, hung up to please the Eye, 
 Forever still, whose Flyers never fly : 
 Her Plates unsully d shining on the Shelf ; 
 For Celia dresses nothing, but herself. 
 
 To err is human, to repent divine ; to persist devilish 
 Money & Man a mutual Friendship show : 
 Man makes false Money, Money makes Man so. 
 
 Industry pays Debts, Despair encreases them. 
 
 Bright as the day and as the morning fair, 
 
 Such Cloe is, & common as the air. 
 
 * Dog s dung and silver marks 
 
 Are all one at the day of judgement. 
 
poor Iflicbarfc for 1742 127 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Among- the Divines there has been much Debate, 
 Concerning the World in its ancient Estate ; 
 Some say t was once good, but now is grown bad, 
 Some say t is reform d of the Faults it once had : 
 I say t is the best World, this that we now live in, 
 Either to lend, or to spend, or to give in ; 
 But to borrow, to beg, or to get a Man s own, 
 It is the worst World that ever was known. 
 
 Here comes Glib-Tongue : who can out-flatter a Dedi 
 cation ; and lie, like ten Epitaphs. 
 Hope and a Red-Rag, are Baits for Men and Mackerel. 
 With the old Almanack and the old Year, 
 I^eave thy old Vices, tho ever so dear. 
 
 Honest Men often go to I^aw for their Right ; when 
 Wise Men would sit down with the Wrong, supposing 
 the first I/oss least. In some Countries, the Course 
 of the Courts is so tedious, and the Expence so high, 
 that the Remedy, Justice, is worse than Injustice, the 
 Disease. In my travels I once saw a Sign call d The 
 Two Men at Law ; One of them was painted on one Side, 
 in a melancholy Posture, all in Rags, with this Scroll, / 
 have lost my Cause. The other was drawn capering for 
 Joy, on the other Side, with these Words, / havegairid 
 my Suit ; but he was stark naked. 
 
 RUIZES OF HEAI/TH AND I,ONG I,IFE, AND TO 
 
 PRESERVE FROM MALIGNANT FEVERS, 
 
 AND SICKNESS IN GENERAI,. 
 
 Eat and drink such an Exact Quantity as the 
 Constitution of thy Body allows of, in reference 
 to the Services of the Mind. 
 
12$ poor IRictmrfc for 1742 
 
 They that study much, ought not to eat -so 
 much as those that work hard, their Digestion 
 being not so good. 
 
 The exact Quantity and Quality being found 
 out, is to be kept to constantly. 
 
 Bxcess in all other Things whatever, as well 
 as in Meat and Drink, is also to be avoided. 
 
 Youth, Age, and Sick require a different 
 Quantity. 
 
 And so do those of contrary Complexions , 
 for that which is too much for a flegmatick 
 Man, is not sufficient for a Cholerick. 
 
 The Measure of Food ought to be (as much 
 as possibly may be) exactly proportionate to 
 the Quality and Condition of the Stomach, be 
 cause the Stomach digests it. 
 
 That Quantity that is sufficient, the Stomach 
 can perfectly concoct and digest, and it sufficeth 
 the due Nourishment of the Body. 
 
 A greater Quantity of some things may be 
 eaten than of others, some being of lighter 
 Digestion than others. 
 
 The Difficulty lies, in finding out an exact 
 Measure ; but eat for Necessity, not Pleasure, 
 for L<ust knows not where Necessity ends. 
 
 Wouldst thou enjoy a long Life, a healthy 
 Body, and a vigorous Mind, and be acquainted 
 also with the wonderful works of God ? labour 
 in the first place to bring thy Appetite into Sub 
 jection to Reason. 
 
fcoor tttcbarfc for 1742 129 
 
 RUT,ES TO FIND OUT A FIT MEASURE OF MEAT 
 AND DRINK. 
 
 If thou eatest so much as makes thee unfit for 
 Study, or other Business, thou exceedest the 
 due Measure. 
 
 If thou art dull and heavy after Meat, it s a 
 sign thou hast exceeded the due Measure ; for 
 Meat and Drink ought to refresh the Body, and 
 make it chearful, and not to dull and oppress it. 
 
 If thou findest these ill Symptoms, consider 
 whether too much Meat, or too much Drink 
 occasions it, or both, and abate by little and lit 
 tle, till thou findest the inconveniency removed. 
 
 Keep out of the Sight of Feasts and Banquets 
 as much as may be ; for t is more difficult to 
 refrain good Cheer, when it s present, than 
 from the Desire of it when it is away ; the like 
 you may observe in the Objects of all the other 
 Senses. 
 
 If a Man casually exceeds, let him fast the 
 next Meal, and all may be well again, provided 
 it be not too often done ; as if he exceed at Din 
 ner, let him refrain a Supper, &c. 
 
 A temperate Diet frees from Diseases ; such 
 are seldom ill, but if they are surprised with 
 Sickness, they bear it better, and recover sooner; 
 for most Distempers have their Original from 
 Repletion. 
 
 Use now and then a little Exercise a quarter 
 
/3o poor "Kicbarfc for 1742 
 
 of an Hour before Meals, as to swing a Weight, 
 or swing your Arms about with a small Weight 
 in each Hand ; to leap, or the like, for that stirs 
 the Muscles of the Breast. 
 
 A temperate Diet arms the Body against all 
 jexternal Accidents ; so that they are not so eas- 
 jily [hurt] by Heat, Cold or Labour ; if they at 
 any time should be prejudiced, they are more 
 easily cured, either of Wounds, Dislocations or 
 Bruises. 
 
 But when malignant Fevers are rife in the 
 Country or City where thou dwelst, t is ad vise- 
 able to eat and drink more freely, by Way of 
 Prevention ; for those are Diseases that are not 
 caused by Repletion, and seldom attack Full- 
 feeders. 
 
 A sober Diet makes a Man die without Pain ; 
 it maintains the Senses in Vigour ; it mitigates 
 the Violence of the Passions and Affections. 
 
 It preserves the Memory, it helps the Under 
 standing, it allays the heat of Lust ; it brings a 
 Man to a Consideration of his latter End ; it 
 makes the Body a fit Tabernacle for the Lord to 
 dwell in ; which makes us happy in this World, 
 and eternally happy in the World to come, 
 through Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1743. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 FRIENDLY READER, 
 
 BECAUSE I would have every Man make 
 Advantage of the Blessings of Providence, and 
 few are acquainted with the Method of making 
 Wine of the Grapes which grow wild in our 
 Woods, I do here present them with a few easy 
 Directions, drawn from some Years Experience, 
 which if they will follow, they may furnish 
 themselves with a wholesome sprightly Claret, 
 which will keep for several Years, and is not in- 
 ierior to that which passeth for French Claret. 
 
 Begin to gather Grapes from the loth of Sep 
 tember (the ripest first) to the last of October, 
 and having clear d them of Spider webs, and 
 dead Leaves, put them into a large Molasses or 
 
132 poor IRfcbarfc for 1743 
 
 Rum-Hogshead ; after having washed it well, 
 and knock d one Head out, fix it upon the othei 
 Head, on a Stand, or Blocks in the Cellar, if you 
 have any, if not, in the warmest Part of the 
 House, about 2 Feet from the Ground ; as the 
 Grapes sink, put up more, for 3 or 4 Days ; af 
 ter which, get into the Hogshead bare-leg d, 
 and tread them down until the Juice works up 
 about your Legs, which will be in less than half 
 an Hour ; then get out, and turn the Bottom ones 
 up, and tread them again, a Quarter of an Hour ; 
 this will be sufficient to get out the good Juice ; 
 more pressing wou d burst the unripe Fruit, and 
 give it an ill Taste. This done, cover the Hogs 
 head close with a thick Blanket, and if you have 
 no Cellar, and the Weather proves Cold, with 
 two. 
 
 In this Manner you must let it take its first 
 Ferment, for 4 or 5 Days it will work furiously ; 
 when the Ferment abates, which you will know 
 by its making less Noise, make a Spile-hole 
 within six Inches of the Bottom, and twice a Day 
 draw some in a Glass. When it looks as clear 
 as Rock-water, draw it off into a clean, rather 
 than new Cask, proportioning it to the Contents 
 of the Hogshead or Wine * Vat ; that is, if the 
 Hogshead holds twenty Bushels of Grapes, 
 
 * Vat or Fatt, a Namefoi the Vessel, in which you tread 
 the Grapes, and in which the Must takes its first Ferment. 
 
poor IRfcbarfc for 1743 133 
 
 Stems and all, the Cask must at least, hold 20 
 Gallons, for they will yield a Gallon per Bushel. 
 Your Juice or Must * thus drawn from the Vat, 
 proceed to the second Ferment. 
 
 You must reserve in Jugs or Bottles, i Gallon 
 or 5 Quarts of the Must to every 20 Gallons you 
 have to work ; which you will use according to 
 the following Directions. 
 
 Place your Cask, which must be chock full, 
 with the Bung up, and open twice every Day, 
 Morning and Night ; feed your Cask with the 
 reserved Must ; two Spoonfuls at a time will suf 
 fice, cleaning the Bung after you feed it, with 
 y our Finger or a Spoon, of the Grape-Stones and 
 other Filth which the Ferment will throw up ; 
 you must continue feeding it thus until Christ 
 mas, when you may bung it up, and it will be 
 fit for Use, or to be rack d into clean Casks 
 or Bottles, by February. 
 
 N. B. Gather the Grapes after the Dew is off, 
 and in all dry Seasons. I/et not the Children 
 come at the Must, it will scour them severely. 
 If you make Wine for Sale, or to go beyond 
 Sea, one quarter Part must be distill d, and the 
 Brandy put into the three Quarters remaining. 
 One Bushel of Grapes, heap Measure, as you 
 
 * Must is a Name for the Juice of the IVine before it is 
 fermented, afterwards >t is called Wine, 
 
134 poor IRicbarfc for 1743 
 
 gather them from the Vine, will make at least a 
 Gallon of Wine, if good, five Quarts. 
 
 Those Directions are not design d for those 
 who are skill d in making Wine, but for those 
 who have hitherto had no Acquaintance with 
 that Art. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 On the Florida War. 
 
 From Georgia t Augustine the General goes ; 
 From A ugustine to Georgia comes our Foes ; 
 Hardy from Charleston to St. Simons hies, 
 Again from thence to Charleston back he flies. 
 Forth from St. Simons then the Spaniards creep ; 
 Say, Children, Is not this your Play, Bo Peep ? 
 
 How few there are who have courage enough to own 
 their Faults, or resolution enough to mend them I 
 
 Men differ daily, about things which are subject to 
 Sense, is it likely then they should agree about things 
 invisible. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Democritus, dear Droll, revisit F^arth ; 
 
 And with our Follies glut thy heighten d Mirth : 
 
 Sad Heraclitus, serious Wretch, return ; 
 
 In louder Grief, our greater Crimes to mourn 
 
 Between you both, I unconcern d stand by : 
 
 Hurt, can I laugh ? and honest, need I cry. 
 
 Mark with what insolence and pride, 
 Blown Bufo takes his haughty stride ; 
 As if no toad was toad beside. 
 
 Ill Company is like a dog who dirts those most, that 
 he loves best 
 
poor IRicbarO for 1743 135 
 
 From bad Health, bad Conscience, & Parties dull Strife 
 From an insolent Friend, & a termagant Wife, 
 From the Kindred of such (on one Side or t other) 
 Who most wisely delight in plaguing each other ; 
 From the Wretch who can cant, while he Mischief 
 
 designs, 
 
 From old rotten Mills, bank d Meadows & Mines ; 
 From Curses like these if kind Heav n defends me, 
 I 11 never complain of the Fortune it sends me. 
 In prosperous fortunes be modest and wise, 
 The greatest may fall, and the lowest may rise : 
 But insolent People that fall in disgrace, 
 Are wretched and no body pities their Case. 
 
 lye sage entend a demi mot.* 
 Sorrow is dry. 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 A Parrot is for Prating priz d, 
 
 But prattling Women are despis d ; 
 
 She who attacks another s Honour 
 
 Draws every living Thing upon her. 
 
 Think, Madam, when you stretch your I/ungs, 
 
 That all your Neighbors too have Tongues ; 
 
 One Slander fifty will beget ; 
 
 The World with Interest pays the Debt. 
 
 The World is full of fools and faint hearts ; and yet 
 every one has courage enough to bear the misfortunes, 
 and wisdom enough to manage the Affairs of his neigh 
 bour. 
 
 Beware, beware ! he 11 cheat ithout scruple, who can 
 without fear. 
 
 * The wise understand half a word. 
 
136 poor IRicbarO for 1743 
 
 The Snows are gone, and genial Spring once more 
 
 New clothes the Meads with Grass, the Trees witt 
 
 I/eaves ; 
 And the proud Rivers that disdain d a Shore 
 
 Within their Banks now roll their lessen d Waves. 
 Nature seems all renew d, youthful and gay, 
 
 IJv n lyuna doth her monthly I^oss supply ; 
 But Years and Hours that whirl our Time away, 
 
 Describe our State, and tell us we must die. 
 
 The D 1 wipes his B ch with poor Folks Pride. 
 
 Content and Riches seldom meet together, 
 Riches take thou, contentment I had rather. 
 Speak with contempt of none , from slave to king, 
 The meanest Bee hath, and will use, a sting. 
 
 JUNB. 
 Every Man for himself, &c. 
 
 A Town fear d a Siege, and held Consultation, 
 
 What was the best Method of Fortification : 
 
 A grave skilful Mason declar d his Opinion, 
 
 That nothing but Stone could secure the Dominion, 
 
 A Carpenter said, Tho that was well spoke 
 
 Yet he d rather advise to defend it with Oak. 
 
 A Tanner much wiser than both these together, 
 
 Cry d, Try what you please , but nothing s like Leather. 
 
 The church, the state, and the poor, are 3 daughter! 
 which we should maintain, but not portion off. 
 A achwyno heb achos ; gwneler achos iddo.* 
 A little well-gotten will do us more good, 
 Than lordships and scepters by Rapine and Blood. 
 
 * A complainant without cause, give him cause t* 
 complain, 
 
poor IRtcbarfc for 1743 137 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Friend Col and I, both full of whim, 
 
 To shun each other oft agree ; 
 For I m not Beau enough for him ; 
 
 And he s too much a Beau for me. 
 Then let us from each other fly 
 
 And Arm in-arm no more appear ; 
 That I may ne er offend your E)ye ; 
 
 That you may ne er offend my Ear. 
 
 Borgen macht sorgen.* 
 
 I^et all Men knowthee, but no man know thee thor< 
 oughly : Men freely ford that see the shallows. 
 T is easy to frame a good bold resolution ; 
 But hard is the Task that concerns execution. 
 
 Cold & cunning come from the north : 
 
 but cunning sans wisdom is nothing worth. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 On buying a BIBLE. 
 
 T is but a Folly to rejoice, or boast, 
 
 How small a Price thy well bought Purchase cost, 
 
 Until thy Death, thou shalt not fully know 
 
 Whether it was a Pennyworth or no ; 
 
 And, at that time, believe me t will appear 
 
 Kxtreamly cheap, or else extreamly dear. 
 
 T is vain to repine, 
 Tho a learned Divine 
 Will die at nine. 
 A noddo duw, ry noddir.f 
 
 * Borrowing makes sorrowing. 
 
 f Should read A noddo Duw, rhy nodderi.e. , Assurance 
 hath he doubly sure, who by his God is kept secure, 
 
*38 poor IRicbarO for 1743 
 
 Ah simple Man ! when a boy two precious jewels were 
 given thee, Time and good Advice ; one thou hast lost, 
 and the other thrown away. 
 
 No sunno i bun 
 
 Na wnaid i un.* 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 Good Death, said a Woman, for once be so kind 
 To take me, and leave my dear Husband behind, 
 But when Death appear d with a sour Grimace, 
 The Woman was dash d at his thin hatchet Face ; 
 So she made him a Courts y, and modestly sed, 
 If you come for my Husband, he lies there in Bed. 
 
 Dick told his spouse, he durst be bold to swear 
 
 Whatever she prayed for, Heav n would thwart her pray r: 
 
 Indeed ! says Nell, t is what I m pleas d to hear ; 
 
 For now 1 " II pray for your long life, my dear. 
 
 The sleeping Fox catches no poultry, Up ! up ! 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 A Musketo just starv d, in a sorry Condition, 
 Pretended to be a most skilful Musician ; 
 He comes to a Bee-hive, and there he would stay 
 To teach the Bees Children to sing Sol la fa. 
 The Bees told him plainly the Way of their Nation, 
 Was breeding up Youth in some honest Vocation ; 
 I^est not bearing labour, they should not be fed, 
 And lien curse their Parents for being high bred. 
 If you d be wealthy, think of saving, more than ot 
 
 getting : The Indies have not made Spain rich, because 
 
 her Outgoes equal her Incomes. 
 Tugend bestehet wen alles vergehet.f 
 
 * He who would when he could : 
 
 Is not able when he would ? 
 t Virtue remains when all else is lost. 
 
Ipoor IRicbarfc for 1743 139 
 
 Came you from Court ? for in your Mien 
 A self-important air is seen. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 A year of Wonders now behold ! 
 
 Britons despising Gallic Gold ! 
 
 A Year that stops the Spanish Plunders ! 
 
 A Year that they must be Refunders ! 
 
 A Year that sets our Troops a marching 1 
 
 A Year secures our Ships from Searching ! 
 
 A Year that Charity s extended ! 
 
 A Year that Whig and Tory s blended ! 
 
 Amazing Year ! that we re defended ! 
 
 Hear what Jack Spaniard says, 
 
 Con todo el Munda Guerra 
 
 Y Paz con Ingalatierra.* 
 
 If you d have it done, Go : If not, send. 
 
 Many a long dispute among Divines may be thus 
 abridg d, It is so : It is not so, It is so ; It is not so. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Inclement Winter rages o er the Plains 
 
 Incrusts the Earth and binds the Floods in Chains. 
 
 Is the Globe mov d ? or does our Country roll, 
 
 In nearer Latitude to th artic Pole ? 
 
 The Fate of Lapland and its Cold v/e bear, 
 
 Yet want the Fur, the Sledge and harness d Deer : 
 
 To punish Guilt, do angry Stars combine 
 
 Conjunct or Opposite, Quarrile or Trine ? 
 
 Experience keeps a dear school, yet Fools will learn in 
 no other. 
 Felix quern faciunt aliena pericula cautum.f 
 
 * With all the world at war, there is peace in England. 
 f Happy is he that takes caution from others. 
 
140 poor IRicbarfc for 1743 
 
 How many observe Christ s Birth-day I How few bis 
 Precepts ! O i t is easier to keep Holidays than Com 
 mandments. 
 
 Once on a Time it by Chance came to pass, 
 
 That a Man and his Son were leading an Ass. 
 
 Cries a Passenger, Neighbour, you re shrewdly put to t 
 
 To lead an Ass empty, and trudge it on foot. 
 
 Nay, quoth the old Fellow, if Folk do so mind us 
 
 I 11 e en climb the Ass, and Boy mount behind us : 
 
 But as they jogg d on they were laugh t and hisse d , 
 
 What, two booby Rubbers on one sorry Beast ! 
 
 This is such a Figure as never was known ; 
 
 T is a Sign that the Ass is none of your own. 
 
 Then down gets the Boy, and walks by the Side, 
 
 Till another cries, What, you old Fool must you ride? 
 
 When you see the poor Child that s weakly and young 
 
 Forc d thro thick and thin to trudge it along, 
 
 Then down gets the Father, and up gets the Son ; 
 
 If this cannot please them we ne er shall have done. 
 
 They had not gone far, but a Woman cries out, 
 
 O you young graceless Imp, you 11 be hang d, no doubt ! 
 
 Must you ride an Ass, and your Father that s grey 
 
 K en foot it, and pick out the best of his Way ? 
 
 So now to please all they but one Trick lack, 
 
 And that was to carry the Ass a pick pack : . 
 
 But when that was try d, it appear d such a Jest, 
 
 It occasioned more Laughter by half than the rest. 
 
 Thus he who d please all, and their Good liking gain, 
 
 Shows a deal Good Nature, but labours in vain. 
 
 A Person threatning to go to I/aw, was dissuaded from 
 it by his Friend, who desired him to consider, for the 
 L,aw was chargeable. I don t care, reply d the other, I 
 will not consider, I 11 go to Law. Right, said his Friend, 
 for if you go to law, I am sure you don t consider. 
 
fcoor ttfcbarfc for 1743 141 
 
 A Farmer once made a Complaint to a Judge, 
 My Bull, if it please you, Sir, owing a Grudge, 
 Belike to one of your good Worship s Cattle, 
 Has slain him out-right in a mortal Battle : 
 I m sorry at heart because of the Action, 
 And want to know how must be made Satisfaction. 
 Why, you must give me your Bull, that s plain 
 Says the Judge, or pay me the Price of the Slain. 
 But I have mistaken the Case, Sir, says John, 
 The dead Bull I talk of, & please you, s my own : 
 And yours is the Beast that the Mischief has done.. 
 The Judge soon replies with a serious Face : 
 Say you so ; then this Accident alters the Case. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1744. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 This is the Twelfth Year that I have in this 
 
 Way laboured for the Benefit Whom? 
 
 of the Publick, if you 11 be so good- 
 natured as to believe it ; if not, e en take the 
 naked Truth, t was for the Benefit of my own 
 dear self; not forgetting in the mean time, our 
 gracious Consort and Dutchess the peaceful, 
 quiet, silent Lady Bridget. But whether my 
 Labours have been of any Sendee to the Pub- 
 lick or not, the Publick I must acknowledge 
 has been of Service to me ; I have lived Com 
 fortably by its Benevolent Encouragement ; and 
 I hope I shall always bear a grateful Sense of its 
 continued Favour. 
 
 My Adversary J . . n J n has indeed 
 
 made an Attempt to out-shine me by pretending 
 
 to penetrate a Year deeper into Futurity ; and 
 
 142 
 
H>oor tfticbard for 1744 143 
 
 giving his Readers gratis in his Almanack for 
 1743 an -Eclipse of the Year 1744, to be before 
 hand with me : His Words are, The first Day 
 of April next Year 1744, there will be a 
 "GREAT ECLIPSE of the Sun; it begins 
 " about an Hour before Sunset. It being in the 
 " Sign Aries, the House of Mars, and in the 7th, 
 "shows Heat, Difference and Animosities be- 
 "tween Persons of the highest Rank and 
 "Quality," &c. I am very glad, for the Sake 
 of * * * se Persons of Rank and Quality, that 
 there is * * manner of Truth in this Prediction : 
 They may, ***** please, live in Love and 
 Peace. And I ***** his Readers (they are 
 but few, indeed, and so the Matter s the less) 
 not to give themselves any Trouble about ob 
 serving this imaginary Great Eclipse ; for they 
 may stare till they re blind without seeing the 
 least Sign of it. I might, on this Occasion, 
 
 return Mr. J n the Name of BaaVs false 
 
 Prophet he gave me some Years ago in his 
 Wrath, on Account of my Predicting his Recon 
 ciliation with the Church of Rome, (tho he 
 seems now to have given up that Point) but I 
 think such Language ******* old Men and 
 Scholars unbecoming ; and ********** the 
 Affair with the Buyers of his Almanack as well 
 as he can, who perhaps will not take it very 
 kindly, that he has done what in him lay (by 
 
144 t>oor IRicbarD for 1744 
 
 sending them out to gaze at an invisible Eclipse 
 on the first of April] to make April Fools of 
 them all. His old thread-bare Excuse which he 
 repeats Year after Year about the Weather, 
 "That no Man can be infallible therein, by 
 "Reason of the many contrary Causes happen 
 ing at or near the same time, and the Un- 
 " constancy of the Summer Showers and Gusts," 
 &c. will hardly serve him in the Affair of 
 Eclipses ; and I know not where he 11 get 
 another. 
 
 I have made no Alteration in my usual 
 Method, except adding the Rising and Setting 
 of the Planets, and the Lunar Conjunctions. 
 Those who are so disposed, may thereby very 
 readily learn to know the Planets, and dis 
 tinguish them from each other. 
 / am, dear Reader, 
 
 Thy obliged Friend, 
 R. SAUNDERS. 
 
 THE COUNTRY MAN. 
 
 Happy the Man whose Wish and Care 
 
 A few paternal Acres bound, 
 Content to breathe his native Air, 
 
 In his own Ground. 
 
 Whose Herds with Milk, whose Fields with Bread D 
 
 Whose Flocks supply him with Attire, 
 Whose Trees in Summer yield him Shade, 
 In Winter Fire. 
 
poor IRtcbarfc for 174* 145 
 
 Blest, who can unconcernedly find 
 
 Hours, Days and Years slide soft away, 
 In Health of Body, Peace of Mind, 
 
 Quiet by Day, 
 
 Sound Sleep by Night ; Study and Ease 
 
 Together mixt ; Sweet Recreation ; 
 And Innocence which most does please 
 
 With Meditation. 
 
 Thus let me live, unseen, unknown, 
 
 Thus unlamented let me die, 
 Steal from the World, and not a Stone 
 Tell where I lie. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Biblis does Solitude admire, 
 
 A wond rous I,over of the Dark ; 
 Each Night puts out her Chamber Fire, 
 
 And j ust keeps in a single Spark ; 
 Till four she keeps herself alive, 
 
 Warm d by her Piety, no doubt : 
 Then, tir d with kneeling, just at five, 
 She sighs and lets that Spark go out. 
 
 He that drinks his Cyder alone, let him catch hifl 
 Horse alone. 
 
 Who is strong ? He that can conquer his bad Habits. 
 Who is rich ? He that rejoices in his Portion. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Our youthful Preacher see, intent on Fame ; 
 Warm to gain Souls ? No, t is to gain a Name. 
 Behold his Hands display d, his Body rais d ; 
 
 With what a Zeal he labours to be prais d. 
 
 Touch d with each Weakness which he does arraign, 
 
146 poor IRicbarfc for 1744 
 
 With Vanity he talks against the Vain ; 
 With Ostentation does to Meekness guide ; 
 Proud of his Periods form d to strike at Pride. 
 
 He that has not got a Wife, is not yet a compleat Man 
 
 Without Repentance none to Heav n can go, 
 Yet what Repentance is few seem to know : 
 T is not to cry out Mercy, or to sit 
 And droop, or to confess that thou hast fail d ; 
 T is to bewail the Sins thou didst commit, 
 And not commit those Sins thou hast bewail d. 
 He that bewails, and not forsakes them too, 
 Confesses rather what he means to do. 
 
 What you would seem to be, be really. 
 If you d lose a troublesome Visitor, lend him money. 
 Tart Words make no Friends : spoonful of honey will 
 catch more flies than Gallon of Vinegar. 
 
 With what a perfect World-revolving Power 
 Were first the unwieldy Planets launch d along 
 Th illimitable Void ! Thus to remain 
 Amid the Flux of many thousand Years, 
 That oft has swept the busy Race of Men, 
 And all their labour d Monuments away : 
 Unresting, changeless, matchless, in their Course : 
 To Night and Day, with the delightful Round 
 Of Seasons, faithful, not eccentric once : 
 So pois d, and perfect is the vast Machine ! 
 
 Make haste slowly. 
 
 Dine with little, sup with less : Do better still ; sleep 
 supperless. 
 
fcoor Iftfcbarfc for 1744 147 
 
 Industry, Perseverance, & Frugality, make Fortune 
 yield. 
 
 Irus tho wanting Gold and L,ands, 
 I^ives chearful, easy, and content ; 
 Corons, unbless d, with twenty Hands 
 Employ d to count his yearly E.ent. 
 Sages in Wisdom ! tell me which 
 Of these you think possesses more ! 
 One with his Poverty is rich , 
 And one with all his Wealth is poor. 
 
 I 11 warrant ye, goes before Rashness ; Who d-a-tho t 
 comes sneaking after. 
 Prayers and Provender hinder 110 Journey. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Of all the Causes which conspire to blind 
 Man s erring Judgment, and misguide the Mind, 
 What the weak Head with strongest Biass rules, 
 Is Pride, that never-failing Vice of Fools. 
 Whatever Nature has in Worth deny d, 
 She gives in large Recruits of needful Pride ; 
 For as in Bodies, thus in Souls we find 
 What wants in Blood & Spirits, swell d with Wind. 
 
 Hear Reason, or she 11 make you feel her. 
 Give me yesterday s Bread, this Day s Flesh, and last 
 Year s Cyder. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 All-conq ring Heat, oh intermit thy Wrath i 
 And on my throbbing Temples potent thus 
 Beam not so hard ! Incessant still you flow, 
 And still another fervent Flood succeeds, 
 Pour d on the Head profuse. In vain I sigh, 
 
148 poor IRfcbarD for 1744 
 
 And restless turu, find look around for night 
 Night is far ofT; and hotter Hours approach. 
 Who can endure ! - - - - 
 
 God heals, and the Doctor takes the Fees. 
 
 Sloth (like Rust) consumes faster than I,abour wears ; 
 the used Key is always bright. 
 
 I4ght Gains heavy Purses. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 Would men but follow what the Sex advise, 
 
 All things would prosper, all the World grow wise. 
 
 T was by Rebecca s Aid that Jacob won 
 
 His Father s Blessing from an elder Son. 
 
 Abusive Nabal ow d his forfeit lyife 
 
 To the wise Conduct of a prudent Wife. 
 
 At Hester s Suit, the persecuting Sword 
 
 Was sheath d, and Israel liv d to bless the I,ord. 
 
 Keep thou from the Opportunity, and God will keep 
 vhee from the Sin. 
 
 Where there s no I<aw, there s no Bread. 
 As Pride increases, Fortune declines. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 All other Goods by Fortune s Hand are giv n, 
 A WIFK is the peculiar gift of Heav n. 
 Vain Fortune s Favours, never at a Stay, 
 I^ike empty Shadows, pass, and glide away ; 
 One solid Comfort, our eternal Wife, 
 Abundantly supplies us all our I^ife : 
 This Blessing lasts (if those that try say true) 
 As long as Heart can wish and longer too. 
 
 Drive thy Business, or it will drive thee. 
 
poor IRlcbaro for 1744 149 
 
 A full Belly is the Mother of all Evil. 
 
 The same man cannot be both Friend and Flatterer. 
 
 He who multiplies Riches multiplies Cares. 
 
 An old man in a House is a good Sign. 
 
 OCTOBBR. 
 
 Be Niggards of Advice on no Pretence ; 
 For the worst Avarice is that of Sense. 
 Yet t is not all, your Counsel s free and true ; 
 Blunt Truths more Mischief than nice Falshoods do. 
 Men must be taught as if you taught them not, 
 And Things unknown propos d as Things forgot ; 
 Without Good Breeding Truth is disapprov d 
 That only makes superior Sense belov d. 
 
 Those who are fear d, are hated. 
 The Things which hurt, instruct. 
 
 The Bye of a Master, will do more Work than his 
 Hand. 
 A soft Tongue may strike hard. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Sylvia while young, with ev ry Grace adorn d, 
 Each blooming Youth, and fondest IvOver scorn d : 
 In Years at length arriv d at Fifty-nine, 
 She feels Cove s Passion as her Charms decline : 
 
 Thus Oaks a hundred Winters old 
 
 Just as they now expire, 
 Turn Touchwood, doated, grey and old, 
 And at each Spark take Fire. 
 
 If you d be belov d, make yourself amiable. 
 
 A true Friend is the best Possession. 
 
 Fear God, and your Enemies will fear you. 
 
150 poor IRtcbarD tor 1744 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 This World s an Inn, all Travellers are we ; 
 And this World s Goods th Accommodations be. 
 Our I^ife is nothing but a Winter s Day ; 
 Some only break their Fast, and so away. 
 Others stay Dinner, and depart full fed. 
 The deepest Age but sups and goes to bed. 
 He s most in Debt that lingers out the Day ; 
 Who dies betimes has less and less to pay. 
 
 Epitaph on a Scolding Wife by her Husband. Here 
 my poor Bridget s Corps doth lie, she is at rest, and 
 so am I. 
 
 COURTS. 
 
 Two trav ling Beggars, (I ve forgot their name) 
 On Oister found to which they both laid Claim. 
 Warm the Dispute ! At length to I<aw they d go s 
 As richer Fools for Trifles often do. 
 The Cause two Petty foggers undertake, 
 Resolving right or wrong some Gain to make. 
 They jangle till the Court this Judgment gave, 
 Determining what every one should have. 
 
 Blind Plaintiff, lame Defendant, share 
 
 The friendly Law s impartial Care : 
 
 A Shell for him, a Shell for thee ; 
 
 The MIDDLE s Bench and Lawyer s Fee, 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1745. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 For the Benefit of the Publick, and my own 
 Profit, I have performed this my thirteenth 
 annual Labour, which I hope will be as accept 
 able as the former. 
 
 The rising and setting of the Planets, and 
 their Conjunctions with the Moon, I have con 
 tinued ; whereby those who are unacquainted 
 with those heavenly Bodies, may soon learn to 
 distinguish them from the fixed Stars, by ob 
 serving the following directions. 
 
 All those glittering Stars, (except five) which 
 we see in the Firmament of Heaven, are called 
 fixed Stars, because they keep the Same Dis 
 tance from one another, and from the Ecliptic ; 
 they rise and set at the same point of the Hori- 
 
 151 
 
152 poor IRicbaro tor 1745 
 
 zon, and appear like so many lucid Points fixed 
 to the celestial Firmament. The other five have 
 a particular and different motion, for which 
 Reason they have not always the same Distance 
 from one another ; and therefore they have been 
 called wandering Stars or Planets, viz. Saturn 
 ^, Jupiter if, Mars $, Venus $, and Mercury 
 $ , and these may be distinguished from the 
 fixed Stars by their not twinkling. The bright 
 est of the five is Venus, which appears the 
 biggest ; and when this glorious Star appears, 
 and goes before the Sun, it is called Phosphorus, 
 or the Morning Star, and Hesperus, or the Bveii- 
 ing-Star, when it follows the Sun. Jupiter 
 appears almost as big as Venus, but not so 
 bright. Mars may be easily known from the 
 rest of the Planets, because it appears red like 
 a hot Iron or burning Coal, and twinkles a lit 
 tle. Saturn, in Appearance, is less than Mars, 
 and of a pale colour. Mercury is so near the 
 Sun that it is seldom seen. 
 
 Against the 6th Day of January you may see 
 $ rise 10 35, which signifies the Planet Mars 
 rises 35 Minutes after 10 o Clock at Night, when 
 that Planet may be seen to appear in the East. 
 Also against the loth Day of January you will 
 find 9 sets 7 13, which shows Venus sets 13 
 Minutes after 7 o Clock at Night. If you look 
 towards the West that Evening, you may see 
 
poor IRfcbarD for 1745 153 
 
 that beautiful Star till the Time of its setting. 
 Again, on the i8th Day of the same Month, you 
 will find *? rise 9 18, which shews that Saturn 
 rises 18 Minutes after 9 at Night. 
 
 Or the Planets may be known by observing 
 them at the time of their Conjunctions with the 
 Moon, viz. against the 14 Day of January are 
 inserted these characters 6 D T ? , which shews 
 there will be a Conjunction of the Moon and 
 Saturn on that Day. If you look out about 5 
 o Clock in the Morning, you will see Saturn 
 very near the Moon. The like is to be observed 
 at any other time by the rising and setting of 
 the Planets, and their Conjunctions with the 
 moon ; by which method they may be distinctly 
 known from the fixed Stars. 
 
 I have nothing further to add at present, but 
 my hearty Wishes for your Welfare, both tem 
 poral and spiritual, and Thanks for all your 
 past Favours, being 
 
 Dear Reader, 
 
 Thy obliged Friend, 
 
 R. SAUNDBRS. 
 
 Go, wond rous creature ! mount where Science guides, 
 Go measure Earth, weigh air, and state the Tides ; 
 Shew by what I,aws the wand ring Planets stray, 
 Correct old Time, and teach the Sun his Way. 
 Go soar with Plato to th empyreal Sphere, 
 To thefirst Good, first Perfect, and first Fair; 
 
154 Poor IRtcbarD for 1745 
 
 Or tread the mazy Round his Follow rs trod, 
 And, quitting Sense, called imitation God, 
 As Kastern Priests in giddy circles run 
 And turn their Heads to imitate the Sun. 
 Go teach Eternal Wisdom how to rule, 
 Then drop into thyself, and be a Fool. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 I give and I devise (old Euclio said, 
 And sigh d) " My Lands and Tenements to Ned " 
 Your money, Sir ? My money, Sir ! what, all ? 
 "Why - if I must (then wept) I give it Paul" 
 The Manner, Sir? " The Manner ! hold, he cry d ; 
 " Not that I cannot part with that " and dy d. 
 
 Beware of little Kxpences, a small leak will sink a 
 great ship. 
 
 Wars bring scars. 
 
 A light purse is a heavy curse. 
 
 As often as we do good, we sacrifice. 
 
 Help, Hands ; For I have no Lands. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Self Love but serves the virtuous Mind to wake, 
 As the small Pebble stirs the peaceful Lake ; 
 The Centre mov d, a Circle strait succeeds, 
 Another still, and still another spreads, 
 Friend, Parent, Neighbour, first it will embrace. 
 His Country next, and next all human Race ; 
 Wide and more wide, th o erflowings of the Mind 
 Take every Creature in of every Kind. 
 
 It s common for Men to give pretended Reasons in 
 stead of one rea . one. 
 
poor IRicbaro for 1745 155 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 Fame but from Death a Villian s Name can save, 
 As Justice tears his Body from the Grave ; 
 When what t oblivion better were resign d 
 Is luring on high to poison half Mankind. 
 All Fame is foreign but of true Desert, 
 Plays round the Head, but comes not to the Heart. 
 One self-approving Hour whole Years outweighs 
 Of stupid Starers and of loud Huzza s. 
 
 Vanity backbites more than Malice. 
 
 He s a Fool that cannot conceal his Wisdom. 
 
 Great spenders are bad lenders. 
 
 All blood is alike ancient. 
 
 T is not for Mortals always to be blest : 
 But him the least the dull and painful Hours 
 Of lyife oppress, whom sober SENSE conducts, 
 And VIRTUE, thro this Labyrinth we tread. 
 Virtue and Sense are one ; and, trust me, he 
 Who has not Virtue, is not truly wise. 
 
 You may talk too much on the best of subjects. 
 
 A Man without ceremony has need of great merit in 
 its place. 
 
 No gains without pains. 
 
 Virtue, (for mere GOOD-NATURE, is a Fool) 
 Is Sense and Spirit, with HUMANITY ; 
 T is sometimes angry, and its Fiown confounds 
 T is ev n vindictive, but in Vengeance just. 
 
t56 poor IRicbarfc for 1745 
 
 Knaves fain would laugh at it ; some great ones dare 
 
 But at his Heart, the most undaunted Son 
 
 Of Fortune dreads its name and awful charms. 
 
 Had I revenged wrong, I had not worn my skirts so long 
 Graft good fruit all, or graft not at all. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Unhappy Italy ! whose alter d State 
 
 Has felt the worst Severity of Fate ; 
 
 Not that Barbarian Band her Fasces broke 
 
 And bow d her haughty neck beneath her yoke ; 
 
 Nor that her Palaces to Earth are thrown, 
 
 Her Cities desart, and her Fields unsown ; 
 
 But that her ancient spirit is decay d, 
 
 That sacred Wisdom from her Bounds is fled, 
 
 That there the Source of Science flows no more, 
 
 Whense its rich Streams supply d the world before. 
 
 Idleness is the greatest Prodigality. 
 Old young and old long. 
 
 Punch coal, cut candle, and set brand on end, is nel 
 ther good house-wife, nor good house-wife s friend. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Hot from the Field, indulge not yet your Limbs 
 In wish d Repose, nor court the fanning Gale, 
 Nor taste the Spring. Oh ! by the sacred Tears 
 Of Widows, Orphans, Mothers, Sisters, Sires, 
 Forbear ! ... no other Pestilence has driven 
 Such myriads o er th irremedeable Deap. 
 
 He who buys had need have 100 Eyes, but one s 
 enough for him that sells the Stuff. 
 
 There are no fools so troublesome as those that have 
 wit. 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1745 157 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 Has God, thou fool ! work d solely for thy Good, 
 Thy Joy, thy Pastime, thy Attire, thy Food ? 
 Who for thy Table feeds the wanton Fawn, 
 For him as kindly spread the flow ry I^awn. 
 Is it for thee the I^ark descends and sings ? 
 Joy tones his Voice, Joy elevates his Wings. 
 Is it for thee the Mock bird pours his Throat ? 
 I/jves of his own, and Raptures, swell the note. 
 
 Many complain of their Memory, few of their Judge 
 ment. 
 
 One Man may be more cunning than another, but not 
 more cunning than every body else. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 The bounding steed you pompously bestride, 
 Shares with his I,ord the Pleasure and the Pride. 
 Is thine alone the seed that strows the Plain ? 
 The Birds of Heav n shall vindicate their Grain. 
 Thine the full Harvest of the golden Year ? 
 Part pays, and justly, the deserving Steer. 
 The Hog that plows not, nor obeys thy Call, 
 I,ives on the I,abours of this I,ord of all. 
 
 To God we owe fear and love ; to our neighbours jus 
 tice and character ; to our selves prudence and sobriety. 
 
 Fools make feasts and wise men eat them. 
 
 lyight heel d mothers make leaden-heel d daughters. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 For Forms of Government let Fools contest, 
 
 Whate er is best admin ister d is best ; 
 
 For Modes of Faith let graceless Zealots fight 
 
rs8 fcoor IRtcbarfc for 1745 
 
 His can t be wrong, whose I/ife is in the right : 
 All must be false, that thwart this one great End, 
 And all of God, that bless Mankind, or Mend. 
 
 The good or ill hap of a good or ill life, is the good 01 
 ill choice of a good or ill wife. 
 T is easier to prevent bad habits than to break them. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Fair Summer s gone, and Nature s Charms decay. 
 See gloomy Clouds obscure the cheerful Day ! 
 Now hung with Pearls the dropping Trees appear, 
 Their faded Honours scatter d here and there. 
 Behold the Groves that shine with silver Frost 
 Their Beauty wither d, and their Verdure lost, 
 Sharp Boreas blows, and Nature feels Decay 
 Time conquers all and we must Time obey. 
 
 Every Man has assurance enough to boast of his hon 
 estyfew of their Understanding. 
 
 Interest which blinds some People, enlightens others. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 These Blessings, Reader, may Heav n grant to thee ; 
 
 A faithful Friend, equal in Cove s degree ; 
 
 I^and fruitful, never conscious of the Curse, 
 
 A liberal Heart and never-failing Purse ; 
 
 A smiling Conscience, a contented mind ; 
 
 A temp rate knowledge with true Wisdom join d ; 
 
 A life as long as fair, and when expir d, 
 
 A kindly Death, unfear d as undesir d. 
 
 An Ounce of wit that is bought Is worth a pound that 
 is taught. 
 
 He that resolves to mend hereafter, resolves not to 
 mend now. 
 
poor IRfcbarfc for 1745 159 
 
 COURTS. 
 
 The Christian Doctrine teaches to believe 
 
 Its every Christian s Duty, to forgive 
 
 Could we forgive as fast as Men offend 
 
 The I/AWS slow Progresses would quickly end 
 
 Revenge of past Offences is the Cause 
 
 Why peaceful Minds consented to have lyaws, 
 
 Yet Plaintiffs and Defendants much mistake 
 
 Their Cure, and their Diseases lasting make , 
 
 For to be reconcil d, and to comply 
 
 Would prove their cheap and shortest Remedy, 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1746. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 Who is Poor Richard f People oft enquire, 
 Where lives ? What is he ? never yet the nigher 
 Somewhat to ease your Curiositie, 
 Take these slight Sketches of my Dame and me. 
 
 Thanks to kind Readers and a careful Wife, 
 With plenty bless d, I lead an easy I^ife ; 
 My business Writiug- ; les to drain the Mead, 
 Or crown the barren Hill with useful Shade ; 
 In the smooth Glebe to see the Plowshare worn, 
 And fill the Gtaaary with needful Corn. 
 Press nectarous Cyder from my loaded Trees, 
 Print the sweet Butter, turn the Drying Cheese 
 Some Books we read, tho few there are that hit 
 The happy Point where Wisdom joins with Wit \ 
 That set fair Virtue naked to our View, 
 And teach us what is decent, what is true. 
 The Friend sincere, and honest Man, with Joy 
 Treating or treated oft our Time employ. 
 Our Table next, Meals temperate ; and our Door 
 Op ning spontaneous to the bashful Poor. 
 Free from the bitter Rage of Party Zeal, 
 All those we love who seek the publick Weal. 
 
 rio 
 
fRicbarD for 1746 161 
 
 Nor blindly follow Superstitious I/>ve, 
 Which cheats deluded Mankind o er and o er. 
 Not over righteous, quite beyond the Rule, 
 Conscience perplext by every canting Tool. 
 Nor yet when Folly hides the dubious I^ine, 
 When Good and Bad the blended Colours join ; 
 Rush indiscreetly down the dangerous Steep, 
 And plunge uncertain in the darksome Deep. 
 Cautious, if right ; if wrong resolv d to part 
 The Inmate Snake that folds about the Heart. 
 Observe the Mean, the Motive, and the End, 
 Mending our selves, or striving still to mend. 
 Our Souls sincere, our Purpose fair and free, 
 Without Vain Glory or Hypocrisy : 
 Thankful if well ; if ill, we kiss the Rod ; 
 Resign with Hope, and put our Trust in God. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Nothing exceeds in Ridicule, no doubt 
 
 A Fool in Fashion, but a Fool that s out; 
 
 His Passion for Absurdity s so strong 
 
 He cannot bear a Rival in the Wrong. 
 
 Tho wrong the Mode, comply ; more sense is shewn 
 
 In wearing others Follies than your own. 
 
 If what is out of Fashion most you prize 
 
 Methinks you should endeavour to be wise. 
 
 When the well s dry, we know the worth of water. 
 
 He that whines for Glass without G 
 Take away ~L, and that s he. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Man s rich with little, were his Judgement true, 
 Nature is frugal, and her wants are few ; 
 Those few Wants aiiswer d bring- sincere Delights 
 II 
 
162 poor IRlcbaro for 1746 
 
 But Fools creat themselves new Appetites. 
 Fancy and Pride seek Things at Vast Expence, 
 Which relish not to Reason nor to Sense 
 l,ike Cats in Air-pumps, to subsist we strive 
 On Joys to thin to keep the Soul alive. 
 
 A good Wife & Health, is a Man s best Wealth. 
 A quarrelsome Man has no good Neighbours. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 O sacred Solitude ! divine Retreat ! 
 Choice of the Prudent ! Envy of the Great 1 
 By thy pure Stream, or in thy waving Shade, 
 We court fair Wisdom, that celestial Maid : 
 The genuine Offspring of her lov d Embrace 
 (Strangers on Earth) are Innocence and Peace. 
 There blest with Health, with Business unperplaxt, 
 This lyife we relish, and insure the next. 
 
 Wide will wear, but narrow will tear. 
 Silks andsattins put out the kitchen fire. 
 Vice knows she s ugly, so puts on her Mask. 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 Zara resembles JEjtna crown d with snows, 
 Without she freezes, and within she glows ; 
 Twice e er the Sun descends, with Zeal inspir d 
 From the vain Converse of the World retir d, 
 She reads the Psalms and Chapters of the Day, 
 
 In some leud Novel, new Romance, or Play, 
 
 Thus gloomy Zara, with a solemji Grace, 
 Deceives Mankind, and hides behind her Face. 
 
 It s the esiest Thing in the World for a Man to declevs 
 Jimself. 
 
poor IRtcbarfc for 1746 163 
 
 Women & Wine 
 Game & Deceit 
 Make the Wealth small 
 And the Wants great 
 
 All Mankind are beholden to him that is kind to the 
 Good. 
 
 Pleasures are few, and fewer we enjoy ; 
 Pleasure like Quicksilver, is bright and coy ; 
 We try to grasp it with our utmost skill, 
 Still it eludes us, and it glitters still. 
 If seiz d at last, compute your mighty Gains 
 What is it but rank Poison in your Veins. 
 
 A Plowman on his I^egs is higher than a Gentleman on 
 his Knees. 
 
 Virtue and Happiness are Mother and Daughter. 
 
 The generous Mind least regards Money and yet most 
 feels the Want of it. 
 
 For one poor Man there are an hundred indigent. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 What s Man s Reward for all his Care and Toil? 
 But One ; a female Friends endearing Smile : 
 A tender Smile, our Sorrows only Balm, 
 And in life s Tempest the sad Sailors calm. 
 How have I seen a gentle Nymph draw nigh, 
 Peace in her Air, Persuasion in her Kye ; 
 Victorious Tenderness, it all o ercame, 
 Husbands look d mild, and Savages grew tame. 
 
 Dost thou love lyife ? Then do not squander Time ; for 
 that s the Stuff I/Ife is made of. 
 
 Good Sense is a Thing all need, few have, and none 
 think they want. 
 
164 poor TRicbarfc for 1746 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Who taught the rapid Winds to fly so fast, 
 Or shakes the Centre with his Western Blast ? 
 Who from the Skies can a whole Deluge pour ? 
 Who Strikes thro Nature, with the solemn Roar 
 Of dreadful Thunder, points it where to fall 
 And in fierce lightning wraps the flying Ball ? 
 Not he who trembles at the darted Fires, 
 Falls at the Sound, and in the Flash expires. 
 
 What s proper is becoming : See the Blacksmith with 
 his white Silk Apron ! 
 The Tongue is ever turning to the aching tooth. 
 
 Want of Care does us more damage than Want of 
 Knowledge . 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 Can Gold colour Passion, or make Reason shine, 
 Can we dig Peace or Wisdom from the mine ? 
 Wisdom to Gold prefer, for t is much less 
 To make our fortune, than our Happiness. 
 That Happiness which Great Ones often see, 
 With Rage and Wonder, in a low Degree, 
 Themselves unblest. The Poor are only poor 
 But what are they v/ho droop amid their Store ? 
 
 Take Courage Mortal ; Death can t banish thee out of 
 the Universe. 
 
 The Sting of a Reproach is the Truth of it. 
 Do me the favour to deny me at once . 
 
 Can Wealth give Happiness ? look round and see ? 
 What gay Distress ! What splendid Misery 1 
 Whatever Fortune lavishly can pour 
 The Mind annihilates, and calls for more. 
 
poor IRicbaro for 1746 165 
 
 Wealth is a Cheat, believe not what it says ; 
 Greatly it promises, but never pays. 
 Misers may startle, but they shall be told, 
 That Wealth is Bankrupt, and insolvent Gold. 
 
 The most exquisite Folly is made of Wisdom spun 
 too fine. 
 A life of leisure and a life of laziness are two things. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 Some ladies are too beauteous to be wed, 
 
 For where s the Man that s worthy of their Bed? 
 
 If no Disease reduce her Pride before, 
 
 iMvinia will be ravisht at three score. 
 
 Then she submits to venture in the Dark, 
 
 And nothing, now, is wanting but her spark. 
 
 Mad Kings and mad Bulls are not to be held by treaties 
 and packthread. 
 
 Changing Countries or Beds, cures neither a bad 
 Manager, nor a Fever. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 There are, who, tossing on the Bed of Vice, 
 For Flattery s Opiate give the highest price ; 
 Yet from the saving Hand of Friendship turn, 
 Her Med cines dread, her generous offers Spurns. 
 Deserted Greatness ! who but pities thee ? 
 By Crowds encompass d, thou no Friend canst see 
 Or should kind Truth invade thy tender Ear 
 We pity still, for thou no Truth can bear. 
 
 A true great Man will neither trample on a Worm nor 
 sneak to an F,mperor. 
 
 Ni ffyddra Haw dyn er gwneithr da idd ei hun. * 
 * Our hand has no stain if it work to our gain, 
 
166 ipoor TRicbarD for 1746 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 What s Female Beauty, but an Air divine, 
 Thro which the Mind s all gentle Graces shine ? 
 They, like the Sun, irradiates all between ; 
 The Body charms, because the Soul is seen 
 Hence Men are often Captives to a Face, 
 They know not why, of no peculiar Grace. 
 Some Forms tho bright, no mortal Man can bear; 
 Some none resist, tho not exceeding- fair. 
 
 Tim and his Handsaw are good in their Place, 
 Tho not fit for preaching or shaving a face. 
 
 Half Hospitality opens his Door and shuts up hir 
 .\>utitenance. 
 
 From Earth to Heav n when Justice fled 
 The I,aws decided in her Stead 
 For Heav n to F,arth should she return 
 w* Dryers might beg, and I^aw books burn. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1747. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 This is the 15th Time I have entertain d 
 thee with my annual Productions ; I hope to 
 thy profit as well as mine. For besides the as 
 tronomical Calculations, and other Things usu 
 ally contain d in Almanacks, which have their 
 daily Use indeed while the Year continues, but 
 then become of no Value, I have constantly 
 interspers d moral Sentences, prudent Maxims, 
 and wise Sayings, many of them containing 
 much good Sense in very few Words, and there 
 fore apt to leave strong and lasting Impressions 
 on the Memory of young Persons, whereby they 
 may receive Benefit as long as they live, when 
 both Almanack and Almanac-maker have been 
 long thrown by and forgotten. If I now and 
 
i68 poor IRicbarD for 1747 
 
 then insert a Joke or two, that seem to have 
 little in them, my Apology is, that such may 
 have their Use, since perhaps for their Sake 
 light airy Minds peruse the rest, and so are 
 struck by somewhat of more Weight and Mo 
 ment. The Verses on the Heads of the Months 
 are also design d to have the same Tendency. 
 I need not tell thee that many of them are of my 
 own Making. If thou hast any Judgement in 
 Poetry, thou wilt easily discern the Workman 
 from the Bungler. I know as well as thee, that 
 I am no Poet born, and it is a Trade I never 
 learnt, nor indeed could learn. If I make 
 Verses t is in Spight Of Nature and my Stars, 
 I write. Why then should I give my Readers 
 bad Lines of my own, when good Ones of other 
 Peoples are so plenty ? T is methinks a poor 
 Excuse for the bad Entertainment of Guests 
 that the Food we set before them, tho coarse 
 and ordinary, is of one s own raising, off ones 
 own Plantation, &c when there is Plenty of 
 what is ten times better, to be had in the Mar 
 ket. On the contrary, I assure ye, my Friends, 
 that I have procur dthe best I could for ye, and 
 much good may t do ye. 
 
 I cannot omit this Opportunity of making 
 honourable Mention of the late deceased Orna 
 ment and Head of our Profession, Mr. Jacob 
 Taylor, who for upwards of 40 Years (with some 
 
poor IRicbaro for 1747 169 
 
 few Intermissions only) supply d the good peo 
 ple of this and the neighboring Colonies with 
 the most compleat Bphemeris and most accu 
 rate Calculations that have hitherto appear d in 
 America. - - - - he was an ingenious Mathe 
 matician, as well as an expert and skilful As 
 tronomer, and moreover, no mean Philosopher, 
 but what is more than all, He was a PIOUS and 
 HONEST Man. Requiescat in pace. 
 
 I am thy poor Friend, to serve thee, 
 
 R. SAUNDERS. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 To show the Strength, and Infamy of Pride, 
 
 By all t is follow d and by all deny d. 
 
 What Members are there, which at once pursue 
 
 Praise, and Glory to contemn it too ? 
 
 To praise himself Vincenna knows a Shame, 
 
 And therefore lays a Strategem for Fame ; 
 
 Makes his Approach in Modesty s Disguise, 
 
 To win Applause, and takes it by Surprise. 
 
 Strive to be the greatest Man in your Country, and 
 you may be disappointed ; Strive to be the best and you 
 may succeed : He may well win the race that runs by 
 himself. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 See Wealth and Pozv r ! Say, what can be more great? 
 
 Nothing but Merit in a low Estate. 
 
 To Virtue s humblest Son let none prefer. 
 Vice, tho a Croesus or a Conquerer 
 
i?o poor IRicbarD for 1747 
 
 Shall Men, like Figures, pass for high, or base 
 Slight, or important, only by their Place ? 
 Titles are Marks of honest Men, and Wise ; 
 The Fool, or Knave that wears a Title, lies. 
 
 T is a strange Forest that has no rotten Wood in t 
 And a strange Kindred that all are good in t. 
 
 None know the unfortunate, and the fortunate do not 
 know themselves. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 Celestial PATIENCE ! How dost thou defeat 
 The Foes proud Menace, and elude his Hate ? 
 While Passion takes his Part, betrays our Peace ; 
 To Death and Torture swells each slight Disgrace ; 
 By not opposing, Thou dust 111 destroy, 
 And wear thy conquer d Sorrows into Joy. 
 
 There s a time to Wink as well as to see. 
 
 Honest Tom ! you may trust him with a house full of 
 untold Milstones. 
 
 There is no Man so bad but he secretly respects the 
 Good. 
 
 RELIGIOUS Force divine is best dfsplay d, 
 
 In a Desertion of all human Aid : 
 
 To succour in Extreams is her Delight, 
 
 And cheer the Heart when Terror strikes the Sight. 
 
 We, disbelieving our own Senses, gaze 
 
 And wonder what a Mortals Heart can raise, 
 
 To smile in Anguish, triumph in his Grief, 
 
 And comfort those who come to bring Relief. 
 
 When there s more Malice shown than Matter : 
 On the Writer falls the Satyr. 
 
poor IRicbarfc for 1747 171 
 
 MAY. 
 
 Girls, mark my Words ; and know, for Men of Sense, 
 
 Your strongest Charms are native Innocence. 
 
 Shun all deceiving Arts ; the Heart that s gain d 
 
 By Craft alone, can ne er be long retain d. 
 
 Arts on the Mind, like paint upon the Face, 
 
 Fright him, thats worth your I^ove, from your Embrace 
 
 In simple Manners all the Secret lies 
 
 Be kind and virtuous, you 11 be blest and wise. 
 
 Courage would fight, but Discretion won t let him. 
 Delicate Dick ! whispered the Proclamation. 
 Cornelious ought to be Tacitus. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 O, form d Heav n s Dictates nobly to rehearse, 
 PREACHER DIVINE ! accept the grateful Verse. 
 Thou hast the Power, the harden d Heart to warm, 
 To grieve, to raise, to terrify, to charm ; 
 To fix the Soul on God, to teach the Mind 
 To know the Dignity of Human Kind ; 
 By stricter Rules well-govern d lyife to scan, 
 And practise o er the Angel in the Man. 
 
 Pride and the Gout are seldom cur d throughout. 
 
 We are not so sensible of the greatest Health as of the 
 least Sickness. 
 
 A good Example is the best Sermon. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Men drop so fast, ere L,ife s mid Stage we tread, 
 Few know so many Friends alive as dead 
 Yet, as immortal, in our uphill Chace, 
 We press coy Fortune with slacken d Pace. 
 
i?2 ipoor IRicbarD for 1747 
 
 Our ardent I,abours for the Toy we seek, 
 Join Night to Day, and Sunday to the Week 
 Between Satiety and fierce Desire. 
 
 A Father s a Treasure ; a Brother s a Comfort ; f 
 Friend is both. 
 
 Despair ruins some, Presumption many. 
 
 A quiet Conscience sleeps in Thunder, but Rest and. 
 Guilt live far asunder. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 A. decent Competence we fully taste ; 
 It strikes our Sense, and gives a constant Feast : 
 More, we perceive by Dint of Thought alone ; 
 The Rich must labour to possess their own, 
 To feel their great Abundance ; and request 
 Their humble Friends to help them to be blest ; 
 To see their Treasures, hear their Glory told, 
 And aid the wretched Impotence of Gold. 
 
 He that won t be counsell d, can t be help d. 
 
 Craft must be at charge for clothes, but Truth can go 
 naked. 
 
 Write Injuries in Dust, Benefits in Marble. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 But some, good Souls, and touch d with Warmth divine. 
 
 Give Gold a Price and teach its Beams to Shine 
 
 All hoarded Treasures they repute a lyOad 
 
 Nor think their Wealth their own till well bestow d. 
 
 Grand Reservoirs of public Happiness, 
 
 Thro secret Streams diffusively they bless . 
 
 And while their Bounties glide conceal d from View, 
 
 Relieve our Wants, and spare our Blushes too. 
 
floor IRfcbarfc for 1747 173 
 
 What is Serving God ? T is doing Good to Man. 
 What maintains one Vice would bring up two children. 
 Many have been ruin d by buying good pennyworths 
 
 OCTOBER 
 
 One to destroy, is Murder by the I,aw, 
 And Gibbers keep the uplifted Hand in Awe 
 To murder Thousands, takes a specious Name 
 War s glorious Art, and gives immortal Fame. 
 
 great Alliance ! O divine Renown ! 
 
 With Death and Pestilence to share the Crown ! 
 When Men extol a wild Destroyer s Name 
 Earth s Builder and Preserver they blaspheme. 
 
 Better is a little with content than much with conten 
 tion. 
 
 A Slip of the Foot you may soon recover, 
 But a Slip of the Tongue you may never get over. 
 What signifies your Patience, if you can t find it when 
 you want it. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 1 envy none their Pageantry and Show ; 
 I envy none the Gilding of their Woe. 
 
 Give me, indulgent Heav n, with Mind serene 
 And guiltless Heart, to range the Sylvan Scene. 
 No splendid Poverty, no smiling Care, 
 No well-bred Hate, or servile Grandeur there. 
 There pleasing Objects useful Thought suggest, 
 The Sense is ravish d and the Soul is blest ; 
 On every Thorn delightful Wisdom grows, 
 In every Rill a sweet Instruction flows. 
 
 Time enough always proves little enough. 
 It is wise not to seek a Secret and Honest not to re 
 veal it. 
 
i?4 poor IRicbaro for 1747 
 
 A Mob s a Monster ; Heads enough but no Brains. 
 The Devil sweetens Poison with Honey. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Old Age will come, Disease may come before, 
 Fifteen is full as mortal as Threescore. 
 Thy Fortuhe and thy Charms may soon decay ; 
 But grant these Fugitives prolong their Stay 
 Their basis totters, their Foundation shakes, 
 lyife that supports them, in a Moment breaks : 
 Then wrought into the Soul, let Virtue shine, 
 The Ground eternal, as the work divine. 
 
 He that cannot bear with other Peoples Passions, can 
 not govern his own. 
 
 He that by the Plough would thrive, himself must 
 either hold or drive. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1748. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 KIND READER, 
 
 The favourable Reception my annual 
 Labours have met with from the Publick these 
 15 Years past, has engaged me in Gratitude to 
 endeavour some Improvement of my Almanack. 
 And since my Friend Taylor is no more whose 
 Ephemerides so long and so agreeably serv d 
 and entertained these Provinces, I have taken 
 the liberty to imitate his well-known Method, 
 and have given two Pages for each Month ; 
 which affords me Room for several valuable 
 Additions, as will best appear on Inspection 
 and Comparison with former Almanacks. Yet 
 I have not so far followed his Method, as not to 
 continue my own where I thought it preferable ; 
 and thus my Book is increased to a Size beyond 
 his, and contains much more Matter. 
 
176 poor IRfcbarfc for 174S 
 
 Hail Night serene ! thro Thee where er we turn 
 Our wondering Eyes, Heaven s Lamps profusely burn. 
 And Stars unnumbered all the Sky adorn. 
 But lo ! what s that I see appear ? 
 It seems far off a pointed flame ; 
 From Earthwards too the shining Meteor came : 
 
 How swift it climbs th etherial Space 1 
 
 And now it traverses each Sphere, 
 And seems some knowing Mind, familiar to the place. 
 Dame, hand my Glass, the longest, strait prepare ; 
 T is he l t is TAYLOR S Soul that travels there. 
 O stay ! thou happy Spirit, stay, 
 
 A nd lead me on thro 1 all the unbeaten Wilds of Day ; 
 Where Planets in pure Streams of Ether driven, 
 
 Swim thro the blue expanse ofHeaifn. 
 There let me, thy Companion, stray 
 
 From Orb to Orb, and now behold 
 
 Unnumbered Suns , all Seas of molten Gold, 
 And trace each Comet s wandering Way. 
 
 Souse down into Prose again, my Muse ; for 
 Poetry is no more thy element, than Air is of 
 the Flying-Fish ; whose Flights, like thine, are 
 therefore always short and heavy. 
 
 We complain sometimes of hard Winters in 
 tliis Country ; but our Winters will appear as 
 Summers, when compared with those that some 
 of our Countrymen undergo in the most North 
 ern British Colony on this Continent, which is 
 that upon Churchill River, in Hudson s Bay, 
 Lat. 58d. 56m. Long, from London 94d. 5om. 
 West. Captain Middleton, a member of the 
 Royal Society, who had made many Voyages 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1748 177 
 
 thither, and winter d there 1741-2, when he 
 was in search of the North-West Passage to 
 the South-Sea, gives an account of it to that 
 Society, from which I have extracted these 
 Particulars, viz. 
 
 The Hares, Rabbits, Foxes, and Partridges, 
 in September and the beginning of October, 
 change their Colour to a snowy White, and con 
 tinue white till the following Spring. 
 
 The Lakes and standing Waters, which are 
 not above 10 or 12 Feet deep, are frozen to the 
 Ground in Winter, and the Fishes therein all 
 perish. Yet in Rivers near the Sea, and Lakes 
 of a greater depth than 10 or 12 Feet, Fishes 
 are caught all the Winter, by cutting holes 
 thro the Ice, and therein putting Lines and 
 Hooks. As soon as the Fish are brought into 
 the open Air, they instantly freeze stiff. 
 
 Beef, Pork, Mutton, and Venison, kill d in 
 the beginning of the Winter, are preserved by 
 the Frost for 6 or 7 Months, entirely free from 
 Putrefaction. Likewise Geese, Partridges, and 
 other Fowls, kill d at the same Time, and kept 
 with their Feathers on and Guts in, are pre- 
 serv d by the PVost, and prove good Eating. All 
 kinds of Fish are preserv d in the same Manner. 
 
 In large Lakes and Rivers, the Ice is some 
 times broken by imprison d Vapours ; and the 
 Rocks, Trees. Joists, and Rafters of our Build- 
 12 
 
i?8 poor IRfcbarfc for 1748 
 
 ings, are burst with a Noise not less terrible 
 than the firing of many Guns togetiter. The 
 Rocks which are split by the Frost, are heaved 
 up in great Heaps, leaving large Cavities be- 
 hind. If Beer or Water be left even in Copper 
 Pots by the Bed-side, the Pots will be split 
 before Morning. Bottles of strong Beer, Brandy, 
 strong Brine, Spirits of Wine, set out in the 
 open Air for 3 or 4 Hours, freeze to solid Ice. 
 The Frost is never out of the Ground, how deep 
 is not certain ; but on digging 10 or 12 Feet 
 down in the two Summer Months, it has been 
 found hard frozen. 
 
 All the water they use for Cooking, Brewing, 
 &c. is melted Snow and Ice ; no Spring is yet 
 found free from freezing, tho dug ever so deep 
 down. All Waters inland, are frozen fast by 
 the Beginning of October, and continue so to 
 the Middle of May. 
 
 The Walls of the Houses are of Stone, two 
 Feet thick ; the windows very small, with thick 
 wooden Shutters, which are close shut 18 Hours 
 every Day in Winter. In the cellars they put 
 their Wines, Brandies, &c. Four large Fires 
 are made every Day, in greats Stoves to Warm 
 the Rooms. As soon as the Wood is burnt 
 down to a Coal, the Tops of the Chimnies are 
 close stopped, with an Iron Cover ; this keeps 
 the Heat in but almost stifles the People. And 
 
fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1748 179 
 
 notwithstanding this, in 4 or 5 Hours After 
 the Fire is out, the inside of the Walls and 
 Bed-places will be 2 or 3 Inches thick with 
 Ice, which is every Morning cut away with a 
 Hatchet. Three or Four Times a Day, Iron 
 Shot, of 24 Pounds Weight, are made red hot, 
 and hung up in the Windows of their Apart 
 ments, to moderate the Air that comes in at the 
 Crevices ; yet this with a Fire kept burning the 
 greatest Part of 24 Hours, will not prevent Beer, 
 Wine, Ink, etc. from Freezing. 
 
 For their Winter Dress, a Man makes use of 
 three Pair of Socks, of coarse Blanketting, or 
 DufFeld, for the Feet, with a Pair of Deerskin 
 Shoes over them ; two pair of thick English 
 stockings, and a pair of Cloth Stockings upon 
 them ; Breeches lined with Flannel ; two or 
 three English Jackets, and a Fur, or Leather 
 Gown over them ; a large Beaver Cac, double, 
 to come over the Face and Shoulders, and a 
 Cloth of Blanketting under the Chin ; with 
 Yarn Gloves, and a large pair of Beaver Mit- 
 tins, hanging down from the Shoulders before, 
 to put the Hands in, reaching up as far as the 
 Blbows. Yet notwithstanding this warm Cloth 
 ing, those that stir abroad when any Wind 
 blows from the Northward, are dreadfully 
 frozen ; some have their Hands, Arms, and 
 Face blistered and froze in a dreadful Manner, 
 
i8o ipoor IRtcbarfc for 1748 
 
 the Skin coming off soon after they enter a 
 warm House, and some lose their Toes. And 
 keeping House or lying-in for the cure of these 
 Disorders, brings on the Scurvey, which many 
 die of, and few are free from ; nothing prevent 
 ing it but Bxercise and Stirring Abroad. 
 
 The Fogs and Mists, brought by northerly 
 Winds in Winter, appear visible to the naked 
 Eye to be Icicles innumerable, as small as fine 
 Hairs and pointed as sharp as Needles. These 
 Icicles lodge in their Clothes, and if their Faces 
 and Hands are uncover d, presently raise Blis 
 ters as white as a Linen Cloth, and as hard as 
 Horn. Yet if they immediately turn their Back 
 to the Weather, and can bear a hand out of the 
 Mitten and with it rub the blister d Part for a 
 small Time, they sometimes bring the Skin to 
 its former State ; if not they make the best of 
 their way to a Fire, bathe the part in hot Water, 
 and thereby dissipate the Humours raised by 
 the frozen Air ; otherwise the Skin wou d be off 
 in a short Time, with much hot, serous, watry 
 Matter, coming from under along with the 
 Skin ; and this happens to some almost every 
 time they go Abroad, for 5 or 6 Months in the 
 Winter, so extreme cold is the Air, when the 
 
 Wind blows anything strong. Thus 
 
 far Captain Middleton. And now, my tender 
 Reader, thou that shudderest when the wind 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1748 181 
 
 blows a little at N-West, and criest, Tis ex- 
 trrrrrream cohohold! Tis terrrrrrible cohold ! 
 what dost thou think of removing to that de 
 lightful Country ! Or dost thou not rather 
 choose to stay in Pennsylvania, thanking God 
 that He has caused thy Lines to fall in pleasant 
 
 places. 
 
 I am, 
 Thy Friend to Serve thee, 
 
 R. SAUNDERS. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Luke, on his dying Bed, embraced his Wife, 
 And begged one Favour : Swear, my dearest Life, 
 Swear, if you love me, never more to wed, 
 Nor take a second Husband to your Bed. 
 Anne dropt a Tear. You know, my dear, says she. 
 Your least Desires have still been Laws to me ; 
 But from this Oath, I beg you d me excuse ; 
 For I m already promised iojn Jfs. 
 
 Robbers must exalted be, 
 Small ones on the Gallow-Tree, 
 While greater ones ascend to Thrones, 
 But what is that to thee or me ? 
 
 Lost time is never found again. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Don t after foreign Food and Clothing roam, 
 But learn to eat and wear what s rais d at Home,, 
 Kind Nature suits each Clime with what it wants. 
 Sufficient to subsist th Inhabitants. 
 
182 poor IRicbaro tor 1748 
 
 Observing this, we less impair our Health, 
 And by this Rule we more increase our Wealth 
 Our Minds a great Advantage also gain, 
 And more sedate and uncorrupt remain. 
 
 To lead a virtuous lyife, my Friends, 
 
 And get to Heaven in Season, 
 You ve just so much more Need of Faith, 
 
 As you have less of Reason. 
 
 The Sun , whose unexhausted I/ight 
 Does iyife and Heat to Karth convey ; 
 
 The Moon, who, Regent of the Night, 
 Shines with delegated Ray ; 
 
 The Stars, which constant seem to Sight, 
 And Stars that regularly stray : 
 
 All these God s plastick Will from Nothing brought 
 
 Assign d thier Stations, and thier Courses taught. 
 
 The Heathens when they dy d, went to Bed without a 
 Candle. 
 
 Knaves & Nettles are akin ; stroak em kindly, yet 
 they 11 sting. 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 On Education all our L,ives depend ; 
 And few to that, too few, with Care attend : 
 Soon as Mamma permits her darling Joy 
 To quit her Knee, and trusts at School her Boy, 
 O, touch him not, whate er he does is right, 
 His Spirit s tender, tho his Parts are bright. 
 Thus all the Bad he can, he learns at School, 
 Does what he will, and grows a lusty Fool. 
 
 Life with Fools consists in Drinking ; Vith the wise 
 Man, Living s Thinking. 
 Eilen thut felten gut. 
 
jpoor TRicbarD tor 1748 183 
 
 Read much ; the Mind, which never can be still, 
 If not intent on Good, is prone to 111. 
 And where bright Thoughts, or Reas nings just you find, 
 Repose them careful in your inmost Mind. 
 To deck his Chloe s bosom thus the Swain 
 With pleasing toil surveys th enammel d Plain, 
 With Care selects each fragrant flow r he meets, 
 And forms one Garland of thier mingled sweets. 
 
 Sell-cheap kept Shop on Goodwin Sands, and yet had 
 Store of Custom. 
 
 Liberality is not giving much, but giving wisely. 
 
 Finikin Dick, curs d with nice Taste, Ne er meets 
 with good Dinner, half starved at a Feast. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Of all the Charms the Female Sex desire, 
 That I^overs doat on, and that friends admire, 
 Those most deserve your Wish that longest last, 
 Not like the Bloom of Beauty, quickly past ; 
 VIRTUE the Chief: This Men and Angels prize, 
 Above the finest Shape and brightest Eyes, 
 By this alone, untainted Joys we find, 
 As large and as immortal as the Mind. 
 
 Alas ! that Heroes ever were made ! 
 
 The Plague, and the Hero, are both of a Trade ! 
 
 Yet the Plague spares our Goods, which the Hero does 
 
 not ; 
 So the Plague take such Heroes, and let thier Fame 
 
 rot. 
 
 Q. P. D. 
 
1 84 ipoor IRicbarD for 1748 
 
 JULY. 
 
 When great Augustus ruled the World and Rome, 
 The Cloth he wore was spun and wove at Home, 
 His EMPRESS ply d the Distaff and the I^oom. 
 Old England s I^aws the proudest Beauty name, 
 When single, Spinster, and when married, Dame, 
 For Housewifery is Woman s noblest Fame. 
 The Wisest household Cares to Women yield, 
 A large, an useful and a grateful Field. 
 
 To Friend, lawyer, Docter, tell plain your whole Case ; 
 Nor think on Bad Matters to put a good Face : 
 How can they advise, if they see but a Part? 
 T is very ill driving black Hogs in the dark. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 To make the cleanly Kitchen send up Food, 
 Not costly vain, but plentifully Good. 
 To bid the Cellar s fountain never fail, 
 Of sparkling Cyder, or of well-brew d Ale ; 
 To buy, to pay, to blame, or to approve. 
 Within, without, below-stairs, or above ; 
 To shine in every Corner like the Sun, 
 Still working every where, or looking on. 
 
 Suspicion may be no fault, but showing it may be 
 a great one. 
 
 He that s secure is not safe. 
 
 The second Vice is I/ying ; the first is running in Debt 
 
 The Muses love the Morning. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 One glorious Scene of Action still behind, 
 The Fair that likes it is secure to find ; 
 
poor IRicbaro for 1748 185 
 
 Cordials and Medicin s gratis to dispense, 
 A beauteous Instrument of Providence ; 
 Plaisters, and Salves, and Sores, to understand 
 The Surgeon s Art befits a tender Hand, 
 To friendless pain unhop d-for Base to give, 
 And bid the Hungry eat, and Sickly live. 
 
 Two faults of one a Fool will make ; he half repairs, 
 ihat owns does forsake. 
 
 Harry Smatter, has a Mouth for every Matter. 
 When you re good to others, you are best to yourself. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 And thus if we may credit Fame s Report, 
 The best and fairest in the Gallic Court, 
 An Hour sometimes in Hospitals employ, 
 To give the dying Wretch a glimpse of Joy ; 
 T attend the Crouds that hopeless Pangs endure, 
 And soothe the Anguish which they cannot cure ; 
 To clothe the Bare, and give the Btnpty Food ; 
 As bright as Guardian Angels, and as good. 
 
 Half Wits talk much but say little. 
 
 If Jack s in love, he s no Judge of Jill s Beauty. 
 
 Most fools think they are only ignorant, 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Nor be the Husband idle, tho his L,and 
 Yields plenteous Crops without his lab ring Hand ; 
 Tho his collected Rent his Bags supply, 
 Or honest, careful Slaves scarce need his Bye. 
 lyet him whom Choice allures, or Fortunes yields, 
 To live amidst his own extended Fields, 
 Diffuse those Blessings which from Heav n he found. 
 In copious Streams to bless the World around. 
 
i86 poor IRicbarD tor 1748 
 
 Pardoning the Bad, is injuring the Good. 
 He is not well bred, that cannot bear Ill-Breeding ir 
 others. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Open to all his hospitable door, 
 His Tenants Patron, Parent to the I oor : 
 In Friendships dear, discording Neighbours bind 
 Aid the distress d, and humanize Mankind : 
 Wipe off the sorrowing Tear from Virtue s Eyes. 
 Bid Honesty oppress d, again arise : 
 Protect the Widow, give the Aged Rest, 
 And blessing live, and die for ever blest. 
 
 In Christmas feasting pray take care ; 
 Let not your table be a Snare ; 
 But with the Poor God s Bounty share. 
 Adieu, my Friends, till the next year. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1749. 
 
 OMITTED.] 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Advice to Youth. 
 
 First, I,et the Fear of HIM who form d thy Frame, 
 Whose Hand sustain d thee e er thou hadst a Name, 
 Who brought thee into Birth, with Pow r of Thought 
 Receptive of immortal Good, be wrought 
 Deep in thy Soul. His, not thy own, thou art ; 
 To him resign the Empire of thy Heart. 
 His Will, thy I,aw ; His Service, thy Employ ; 
 His Frown, thy Dread, his Smile be all thy Joy. 
 
 Wealth and Content are not always Bed-fellows. 
 Wise Men learn by others harms ; Fools by their own 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Wak d by the Call of Morn, on early Knee, 
 Ere the World thrust between thy God and thee, 
 I,et thy pure Oraisons, ascending, gain 
 His Ear, and Succour of his Grace obtain, 
 In Wants, in Toils, in Perils of the Day, 
 And strong Temptations that beset thy Way. 
 Thy best Resolves then in his Strength renew 
 To walk in Virtue s Paths, and Vice eschew. 
 
IBS poor IRtcbarfc for 1749 
 
 The end of Passion is the beginning of Repentance. 
 Words may shew a man s Wit, but Actions his Mean 
 ing. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 To HIM intrust thy Slumbers, and prepare 
 The fragrant Incense of thy Bv ning Prayer. 
 But first tread back the Day, with Search severe, 
 And Conscience, chiding or applauding, hear. 
 Review each Step ; Where, acting, did I err f 
 Omitting, where f Guilt either Way infer. 
 Labour this Point, and while thy Frailties last, 
 Still let each following Day correct the last. 
 
 T is a well spent penny that saves a groat. 
 Many Foxes grow grey, but few grow good. 
 Presumption first blinds a Man, then sets him a run 
 ning. 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 I,IFE is a shelvy Sea, the Passage fear, 
 
 And not without a skilful Pilot steer. 
 
 Distrust thy Youth, experienc d Age implore, 
 
 And borrow all the Wisdom of Threescore. 
 
 But chief a Father s, Mother s Voice revere ; 
 
 T is Love that chides, t is Love that counsels herr. 
 
 Thrice happy is the Youth, whose pliant Mind 
 
 To all a Parent s Culture is resign d. 
 
 A cold April, The Barn will fill. 
 
 Content makes poor men rich ; Discontent makes rick 
 Men poor. 
 Too much plenty makes Mouth dainty. 
 
 O, well begun, Virtue s great Work pursue, 
 Passions at first we may with Ease subdue ; 
 
ffroor IRfcbarfc for 1749 189 
 
 But if neglected, unrestrain d too long, 
 
 Prevailing in their Growth, by Habit Strong, 
 
 They ve wrapp d the Mind, have fix d the stubborn 
 
 Bent, 
 
 And Force of Custom to wild Nature lent ; 
 Who then would set the crooked Tree aright, 
 As soon may wash the tawny Indian white. 
 
 If Passion drives, let Reason hold the Reins. 
 
 Neither trust, nor contend, nor lay wagers, nor lend ; 
 And you 11 have peace to your L,ives end. 
 
 Drink does not drown Care, but waters it, and makes 
 it grow faster. 
 
 Who dainties love, shall Beggars prove. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Industry s bounteous Hand may Plenty bring, 
 But wanting frugal Care, t will soon take wing. 
 Small thy Supplies, and scanty in their Source, 
 Twixt Av rice and Profusion steer thy Course. 
 Av rice is deaf to Want s Heart-bursting Groan, 
 Profusion makes the Beggar s Rags thy own : 
 Close Fraud and Wrong from griping Av rice grow, 
 From rash Profusion desp rate Acts and Woe. 
 
 A Man has no more Goods than he gets Good by. 
 Welcome, Mischief, if thou comest alone. 
 Different Sects like different clocks, may be all near 
 the matter, tho they don t quite agree. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Honour the softer Sex ; with courteous Style, 
 And Gentleness of Manners, win their Smile ; 
 Nor shun their virtuous Converse ; but when Age 
 And Circumstance consent, thy Faith engage 
 
i go f>oor IRfcbarfc for 1740 
 
 To some discreet, well-natur d, chearful Fair, 
 One not too stately for the Household Care, 
 One form d in Person and in Mind to please, 
 To season lyife, and all its L,abours ease. 
 
 If your head is wax, don t walk in the Sun. 
 Pretty & Witty will wound if they hit ye. 
 
 Having been poor is no shame, but being ashamed of 
 it, is. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 Gaming, the Vice of Knaves and Fools, detest, 
 Miner of Time, of Substance and of Rest ; 
 Which, in the Winning or the loosing Part, 
 Undoing or undone, will wring the Heart : 
 Undone, self-curs d, thy Madness thou wilt rue ; 
 Undoing, Curse of others will pursue 
 Thy hated Head. A Parent s, Household s Tear, 
 A Neighbour s Groan, and Heav n s displeasure fear. 
 
 T is a laudable Ambition, that aims at being better 
 than his Neighbours. 
 
 The wise Man draws more Advantage from his Ene 
 mies, than the Fool from his Friends. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 Wouldst thou extract the purest Sweet of I/ife, 
 Be nor Ally nor Principal in Strife. 
 A Mediator there, thy Balsam bring, 
 And lenify the Wound, and draw the Sting ; 
 On Hate let Kindness her warm Embers throw, 
 And mould into a Friend the melting Foe. 
 The weakest Foe boasts some revenging Pow r; 
 The weakest Friend some serviceable Hour. 
 
 All would live long, but none would be old. 
 
Iftoor IRfcbarfc for 1749 191 
 
 Declaiming against Pride, is not always a Sign of 
 Humility. 
 
 Neglect kills Injuries, Revenge increases them. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 In Converse be reserv d, yet not morose, 
 
 In Season grave, in Season, too, jocose. 
 
 Shun Party-Wranglings, mix not in Debate 
 
 With Bigots in Religion or the State. 
 
 No Arms to Scandal or Detraction lend, 
 
 Abhor to wound, be fervent to defend. 
 
 Aspiring still to know, a Babbler scorn, 
 
 But watch where Wisdom opes her golden Horn. 
 9 Men in 10 are suicides. 
 
 Doing an Injury puts you below your Enemy ; Reven 
 ging one makes you but even with him ; Forgiving it sets 
 you above him. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 In quest of Gain be just : A Conscience clear 
 Is Lucre, more than Thousands in a Year ; 
 Treasure no Moth can touch, no Rust consume ; 
 Safe from the Knave, the Robber, and the Tomb. 
 Unrighteous Gain is the curs d Seed of Woe, 
 Predestin d to be reap d by them who sow ; 
 A dreadful Harvest ! when th avenging Day 
 Shall like a Tempest, sweep the Unjust away. 
 
 Most of the ^earning in use, is of no great Use. 
 Great Good-nature, without Prudence, is a great Mis 
 fortune. 
 
 Keep Conscience clear, Then never fear. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 But not from Wrong alone thy Hand restrain, 
 The Appetite of Gold demands the Rein. 
 
poor TRicbarfc for 174$ 
 
 What Nature asks, what Decency requires, 
 Be this the Bound that limits thy Desires : 
 This, and the gen rous godlike Pow r to feed 
 The Hungry, and to warm the Loins of Need: 
 To dry Misfortune s Tear, and scatter wide 
 Thy Blessings, like the Nile s overflowing Tide. 
 
 A man in a Passion rides a mad Horse. 
 Reader farewel, all Happiness attend thee ; May each 
 New-Year, better and richer find thee. 
 
 HOW TO GET RICHES. 
 
 The Art of getting Riches consists very much in 
 THRIFT. All Men are not equally qualified forgetting 
 Money, but it is in the Power of every one alike to 
 practise this Virtue. 
 
 He that would be beforehand in the World, must be 
 beforehand with his Business : It is not only ill Manage 
 ment, but discovers a slothful Disposition, to do that in 
 the Afternoon, which should have been done in the 
 Morning. 
 
 Useful Attainments in your Minority will procure 
 Riches in Maturity, of which Writing and Accounts are 
 not the meanest. 
 
 Learning, whether Speculative or Practical, is, in 
 Popular or Mixt Governments, the Natural Source of 
 health and Honour. 
 
 In Things of moment, on thy self depend, 
 Nor trust too far thy Servant or thy Friend : 
 With private Views, thy Friend may promise fair, 
 And Servants very seldom prove sincere. 
 
poor IRfcbarfc for 1740 193 
 
 PRECEPT II. 
 
 What can be done, with Care perform to Day, 
 Dangers unthought-of will attend Delay ; 
 Your distant Prospects all precarious are, 
 And Fortune is as fickle as she s fair. 
 
 PRECEPT III. 
 
 Nor trivial I^oss, nor trivial Gain despise ; 
 Molehills, if often heap d, to Mountains rise . 
 Weigh every small Expence, and nothing waste. 
 Farthings long sav d, amount to Pounds at last, 
 13 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1750. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 To THE READER : 
 
 The Hope of acquiring lasting Fame, is, 
 with many Authors, a most powerful Motive to 
 Writing. Some, tho few, have succeeded ; and 
 others, tho perhaps fewer, may succeed here 
 after, and be as well known to Posterity by 
 their Works, as the Antients are to us. We 
 Philomaths, as ambitious of Fame as any other 
 Writers whatever, after all our painful Watch- 
 ings, and laborious Calculations, have the 
 constant Mortification to see our Works thrown 
 by at the Bnd of the Year, and treated as mere 
 waste Paper. Our only Calculation is, that 
 short-lived as they are, they outlive those of 
 most of our Cotemporaries. 
 
 Yet, condemned to renew the Sisyphean Toil, 
 we every Year heave another heavy Mass up the 
 
 194 
 
poor IRfcbarD for 1750 195 
 
 Muses Hill, which never can the Summit reach, 
 and soon comes tumbling down again. 
 
 This, Kind Reader, is my seventeenth Labour 
 of the kind. Thro thy continued Good-will, 
 they have procur d me, if no Bays, at least 
 Pence ; and the latter is perhaps the better of 
 the two ; since t is not improbable, that a Man 
 may receive more solid Satisfaction from Pud 
 ding, while he is living, than from Praise, after 
 he is dead. 
 
 In my last, a few Faults escap d ; some belong 
 to the Author, but most to the Printer : Let 
 each take his Share of the Blame, confess, and 
 amend for the future. In the second Page of 
 August, I mention d 120 as the next perfect 
 number to 28 ; it was wrong, 120 being no 
 perfect number ; the next to 28 I find to be 496. 
 The first is 6 ; let the curious Reader, fond of 
 mathematical Questions, find the fourth. In 
 the 2d Page of March, in some Copies, the 
 Earth s Circumference was said to be nigh 
 4000, instead of 24000 Miles, the figure 2 being 
 omitted at the Begining. This was Mr. Print 
 er s Fault ; who being also somewhat niggardly 
 of his Vowels, as well as profuse of his Con 
 sonants, put in one Place, among the Poetry, 
 mad, instead of made, and in another wrapp d, 
 instead of warp d ; to the utter demolishing 
 of all Sense in those Lines, leaving nothing 
 
196 poor IRicbarfc for 1750 
 
 standing but the Rhime. These, and some 
 others, of a like kind, let the Readers forgive, 
 or rebuke him for, as to their Wisdom and 
 Goodness shall seem meet : For in such Cases 
 the Loss and Damage is chiefly to the Reader, 
 who, if he does not take my Sense at first 
 Reading, t is odds he never gets it ; for ten to 
 one he does not read my Works a second Time. 
 
 Printers indeed should be very careful how 
 they omit a Figure or a Letter : For by such 
 means sometimes a terrible Alteration is made 
 in the Sense. I have heard, that once, in a 
 new Bdition of the Common Prayer, the follow 
 ing Sentence, We shall all be changed in a 
 Moment in the Twinkling of an Eye ; by the 
 Omission of a single Letter, became We shall 
 all be hanged in a Moment, &c. to the no small 
 Surprize of the first Congregation it was read to. 
 
 May this Year prove a Happy One to Thee and 
 Thine, is the hearty wish of, Kind Reader, 
 Thy obliged Friend, 
 R. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 So weak are human Kind by Nature made, 
 Or to such Weakness by their Vice betray d, 
 Almighty Vanity I to thee they owe 
 Their Zest of Pleasure, and their Balm of Woo 
 Thou, like the Sun, all Colours dost contain, 
 Varying- like Rays of I/ight on Drops of Rail ; 
 
poor TRfcbarD for 1750 197 
 
 For every Soul finds Reason to be Proud, 
 Tho hiss d and hooted by the pointing Croud. 
 
 There are three Things extreamly hard, Steel, a Dia 
 mond and to know one s self. 
 Hunger is the best Pickle. 
 
 He is a Governor that governs his Passions, and he a 
 Servant that serves them. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 We smile at Florists, we despise their Joy, 
 
 And think their Hearts enamour d of a Toy ; 
 
 But are those wiser, whom we most admire, 
 
 Survey with Fnvy, and pursue with Fire ? 
 
 What s he, who fights for Wealth, or Fame, or Power? 
 
 Another Florio, doating on a Flower, 
 
 A short-liv d Flower, and which has often sprung, 
 
 From sordid Arts, as Florio s out of Dung. 
 
 A Cypher and Humility make the other Figures & 
 Virtues of tenfold Value. 
 If it were not for the Belly, the Back might wear Gold. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 What s the bent Brow, or Neck in Thought reclin d? 
 
 The Body s Wisdom, to conceal the Mind. 
 
 A Man of Sense can Artifice disdain, 
 
 As Men of Wealth may venture to go plain ; 
 
 And he this Truth eternal ne er forgot, 
 
 Solemnity s a Cover for a Sot ; 
 
 I find the Fool, when I behold the Screen : 
 
 For t is the Wise Man s Interest to be seen. 
 
 Wouldst thou confound thine IJnemy , be good thy self. 
 Pride is as loud a Beggar as Want, and a great deal 
 more saucy. 
 Pay what you owe, and what you re worth you 11 know. 
 
198 {poor IRfcbarfc for 1750 
 
 When e er by seeming Chance, Fop throws his Eye 
 On Mirrors flashing with his Finery, 
 With how sublime a Transport leaps his Heart ; 
 Pity such Friends sincere should ever part. 
 So have I seen on some bright Summer s Day, 
 A spotted Calf, sleek, frolicksome and gay ; 
 Gaze from the Bank, and much delighted seem, 
 Fond of the pretty Fellow in the Stream. 
 
 Sorrow is good for nothing but Sin. 
 
 Many a Man thinks he is buying Pleasure, when he is 
 really selling himself a Slave to it. 
 
 Graft good Fruit all, Or graft not at all. 
 
 MAY. 
 
 Content let all your Virtues lie unknown, 
 If there s no Tongue to praise them, but your own, 
 Of Boasting more than of a Bomb afraid, 
 Merit should be as modest as a Maid. 
 Fame is a Bubble the Reserv d enjoy, 
 Who strive to grasp it, as they touch, destroy ; 
 T is the World s Debt to Deeds of high Degree ; 
 But if you pay yourself, the World is free. 
 
 T is hard (but glorious) to be poor and honest : An 
 empty Sack can hardly stand upright ; but if it does, t is 
 a stout one ! 
 
 He that can bear a Reproof, and mend by it, if he is 
 not wise, is in a fair way of being so. 
 
 Beatus esse sine Virtute nemo potest.* 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Daphnis, says Clio, has a charming Eye ; 
 What Pity t is her Shoulder is awry? 
 
 * No one can be happy without virtue. 
 
poor IRfcbaro for 1750 199 
 
 Aspasia s Shape indeed but then her Air, 
 
 T would ask a Conj rer to find Beauty there. 
 Without a But, Hortensig, she commends, 
 The first of Women, and the best of Friends ; 
 Owns her in Person, Wit, Fame, Virtue, bright ; 
 But how comes this to pass ? She dy d last Night. 
 
 Sound, &c. sound Doctrine, may pass through a Ram s 
 Horn, and a Preacher, without straightening the one, or 
 amending the other. 
 
 Clean your Finger, before you point at my Spots. 
 JULY. 
 
 On Time. 
 
 See TIME) launch d forth, in solemn Form proceed, 
 And Man on Man advance, and Deed on Deed ! 
 No Pause, no Rest in all the World appears, 
 E)v n live long Patriarchs waste their 1000 Years. 
 Some Periods void of Science and of Fame, 
 Scarce e er exist, or leave behind a Name ; 
 Meer sluggish Rounds, to let Succession climb, 
 Obscure, and idle Expletives of Time. 
 
 He that spills the Rum loses that only ; He that drinks 
 it, often loses both that and himself. 
 
 That Ignorance makes devout, if right the Notion, 
 Troth, Rufus, thou rt a Man of great Devotion. 
 
 Others behold each nobler Genius thrive, 
 And in their generous I,abours long survive ; 
 By ^earning grac d, extend a distant I^ight ; 
 Thus circling Science has her Day and Night. 
 Rise, rise, ye dear Cotemporaries, rise ; 
 On whom devolve these Seasons and these Skies ! 
 Assert the Portion destin d to your Share, 
 And make the Honour of the Times your Care. 
 
200 poor IRtcbaro for 1750 
 
 Those that have much Business must have much 
 Pardon. 
 
 Discontented Minds, and Fevers of the Body are not 
 to be cured by changing Beds or Businesses. 
 
 I4ttle Strokes, Fell great Oaks. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 Still be your darling Study Nature s I,aws ; 
 
 And to its Fountain trace up every Cause. 
 
 Explore, for such it is, this high Abode, 
 
 And tread the Paths which Boyle and Newton trod. 
 
 1,0, Earth smiles wide, and radiant Heav n looks down, 
 
 All fair, all gay, and urgent v.o be known ! 
 
 Attend, and here are sown Delights immense, 
 
 For every Intellect, and every Sense. 
 
 You may be too cunning for One, but not for All. 
 Genius without Education is like Silver in the Mine. 
 Many would live by their Wits, but break for want of 
 stock. 
 Poor Plain dealing ! dead without Issue. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 With Adoration think, with Rapture gaze, 
 And hear all Nature chant her Maker s Praise ; 
 With Reason stor d, by L,ove of Knowledge fir d, 
 By Dread awaken d, and by I^ove inspir d, 
 Can We, the Product of another s Hand, 
 Nor whence, nor how, nor why we are, demand? 
 And, not at all, or not aright employ d, 
 Behold a Length of Years, and all a Void ? 
 
 You can bear your own Faults, and why not a Fault in 
 your Wife. 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1750 201 
 
 Tho Modesty is a Virtue, Bashfulness is a Vice. 
 Hide not your Talents, they for Use were made. 
 What s a Sun-Dial in the Shade ? 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Happy, thrice happy he ! whose conscious Heart, 
 Enquires his Purpose, and discerns his Part ; 
 Who runs with Heed, th involuntary Race, 
 Nor lets his hours reproach him as they pass ; 
 Weighs how they steal away, how sure, how fast, 
 And as he weighs them, apprehends the last. 
 Or vacant, or engag d, our Minutes fly ; 
 We may be negligent, but we must die. 
 
 What signifies knowing the Names, if you know not 
 the Natures of Things. 
 
 Tim was so learned, that he could name a Horse in 
 nine languages. So ignorant, that he bought a Cow to 
 ride on. 
 
 The Golden Age never was the present Age. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 And thou supreme of Beings and of Things ! 
 
 Who breath st all I^ife, and giv st Duration Wings ; 
 
 Intense, O let me for thy Glory burn, 
 
 Nor fruitless view my Days and Nights return ; 
 
 Give me with Wonder at thy Works to glow ; 
 
 To grasp thy Vision, and thy Truths to know ; 
 
 To reach at length thy everlasting Shore, 
 
 And live and sing till Time shall be no more. 
 
 T is a Shame that your Family is an Honour to you I 
 You ought to be an Honour to your Family. 
 Glass, China, and Reputation, are easily crack d, and 
 never well mended. 
 Adieu, my Task s ended. 
 
202 poor IRicbarD for 1750 
 
 OF COURTS. 
 
 If any Rogue vexatious Suits advance 
 Against you for your known Inheritance : 
 Enter by Violence your fruitful Grounds, 
 Or take the sacred Land-mark from your Bounds, 
 Or if your Debtors do not keep their Day, 
 Deny their Hands, and then refuse to pay : 
 You must with Patience all the Terms attend, 
 Among the common Causes that depend, 
 
 Till yours is call d : And that long look d-for Day 
 
 Is still encumber d with some new Delay : 
 Your Proofs and Deeds all on the Table spread, 
 
 Some of the B ch perhaps are sick a-bed ; 
 
 That J g steps out to light his Pipe, while this 
 
 O er night was boozy, and goes out to p - - ss. 
 Some Witness miss d ; some Lawyer not in Town, "j 
 So many Rubs appear, the Time is gone, L 
 
 For Hearing, and the tedious Suit goes on. 
 Then rather let two Neighbours end your Cause, 
 And split the Difference ; tho you lose one Half; 
 Than spend the Whole, entangled in the Laws, 
 While merry lawyers sly, at both Sides laugh. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1751. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 Astrology is one of the most ancient Sci 
 ences, had in high Esteem of old, by the Wise 
 and Great. Formerly, no Prince could make 
 War or Peace, nor any General fight a Battle, in 
 short, no important Affair was undertaken with 
 out first consulting an Astrologer^N^Q examined 
 the Aspects and Configurations of the heavenly 
 Bodies, and mark d the lucky Hour. Now the 
 noble Art (more Shame to the Age we live in !) 
 is dwindled into Contempt ; the Great neglect 
 us, Empires make Leagues, and Parliaments 
 Laws, without advising with us ; and scarce any 
 other Use is made of our learned Labours, than 
 to find the best Time of cutting Corns, or geld 
 ing Pigs. This Mischief we owe in a great 
 
 203. 
 
204 poor IRtcbarfc for 1751 
 
 Measure to ourselves : The Ignorant Herd of 
 Mankind, had they not been encourag d to it by 
 some of us, would never have dared to depreci 
 ate our sacred Dictates ; but Urania has been 
 betray d by her own Sons ; those whom she had 
 favour d with the greatest Skill in her divine 
 Art, the most eminent Astronomers among the 
 Moderns, the Newtons, Halleys, and Whistons, 
 have wantonly contemn d and abus d her, con 
 trary to the Light of their own Consciences. Of 
 these, only the last nam d, Whiston, has liv dto 
 repent, and speak his Mind honestly. In his 
 former Works he had treated Judiciary Astrol 
 ogy as a Chimera, and asserted, That not only 
 the fixed Stars, but the Planets (Sun and Moon 
 excepted) were at so immense a Distance, as to 
 be incapable of any Influence on this Barth, 
 and consequently nothing could be foretold 
 from their Positions, but now in the Memoirs 
 of his Life, publish d 1749, in the 82d Year of 
 his Age, he foretels, Page 607, the sudden De 
 struction of the Turkish Empire, and of the 
 House of Austria, German Emperors, &c. and 
 Popes of Rome ; the Restoration of the Jews, 
 and Commencement of the Millennium ; all by 
 Year 1766 ; and this not only from Scripture 
 
 Prophecies ; but (take his own Words) 
 
 " From the remarkable astronomical Signals 
 " that are to alarm Mankind of what is coming, 
 
floor tttcbarfc for 1751 205 
 
 " viz. The Northern Lights since 1715 ; the six 
 " Comets at the Protestant Reformation in four 
 "Years, 1530, 1531, 1533, 1534, compar d with 
 "the seven Comets already seen in these last 
 "eleven Years 1737, 1739, 1742, 1743, 1744, 174$, 
 
 " and 1748. From the great Annular 
 
 Eclipse of the Sun, July 14, 1748, whose Cen- 
 "ter pass d through all the four Monarchies, 
 
 " from Scotland to the Bast Indies. From 
 
 "the Occultation of the Pleiades by the Moon 
 " each periodical Month, after the Eclipse last 
 "July, for above three Years, visible to the 
 " whole Roman Empire ; as there was a like 
 "Occultation of the Hyades from A. 590, to A. 
 
 " 595, for six Years foretold by Isaiah. 
 
 " From the Transit of Mercury over the Sun, 
 " April 25, 1753, which will be visible thro that 
 
 " Empire. From the Comet of A. D. 1456, 
 
 . 1531, 1607, and 1682, which will appear again 
 "about 1757 ending, or 1758 beginning, and 
 
 "will also be visible thro that Empire. 
 
 " From the Transit of Venus over the Sun, May 
 " 26, 1761, which will be visible over the same 
 " Empire : And lastly, from the annular Eclipse 
 "of the Sun, March, n, 1764, which will be 
 
 "visible over the same Empire." From 
 
 these Astronomical Signs, he foretels those 
 great Events, That within 16 Years from this 
 Time, "the Millennium or 1000 Years Reign of 
 
206 floor IRicbarfc for 1751 
 
 " Christ shall begin, there shall be a new Heav- 
 " en. 1 ;, and a new Earth ; there shall be no more 
 "an Infidel in Christendom, Page 398, nor a 
 
 " Gaming-Table at Tunbridge ! " When 
 
 these Predictions are accomplished, what glori 
 ous Proofs they will be of the Truth of our Art ? 
 
 And if they happen to fail, there is no 
 
 doubt that so profound an Astronomer as Mr. 
 Whiston, will be able to see other Signs in the 
 Heavens, foreshowing that the Conversion of 
 Infidels was to be postponed, and the Millen 
 nium adjourn d. After these great Things 
 
 can any Man doubt our being capable of pre 
 dicting a little Rain or Sun-shine ? Reader, 
 
 Farewell, and make the best Use of your Years 
 and your Almanacks, for you see, that accord 
 ing to Whiston, you may have at most, but 
 sixteen more of them. 
 
 Patowmack.July 30, 1750. - - R. SAUNDBRS, 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Who rise to Glory, must by VIRTUE rise, 
 
 T is in the Mind all genuine Greatness lies : 
 
 On that eternal Base, on that alone, 
 
 The World s Esteem you build, and more your own. 
 
 For what avails Birth, Beauty, Fortune s Store, 
 
 The Plume of Title, and the Pride of Pow r, 
 
 If, deaf to Virtue, deaf to Honour s Call, 
 
 To Tyrant Vice a wretched Slave you fall ? 
 
 Pray don t burn my House to roast your Eggs. 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1751 207 
 
 Some Worth it argues, a Friend s Worth to know ; 
 Virtue to own the Virtue of a Foe. 
 Prosperity discovers Vice, Adversity Virtue. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Affect not that vain levity of Thought, 
 Which sets Religion, Virtue, all at nought. 
 For true Religion like the Sun s blest Beam, 
 Darts thro the conscious Mind a heav nly Gleam, 
 Irradiates all the Soul, no Care allows, 
 Calms the best Heart, and smooths the easy Brows. 
 
 Yet think it not enough what s right to know, 
 But let your Practice that right Knowledge show. 
 To Christians bad rude Indians we prefer ; 
 T is better not to know, than knowing err. 
 
 Many a Man would have been worse, if his Estate had 
 been better. 
 We may give Advice, but we cannot give Conduct. 
 
 Some sweet Employ for leisure Minutes chuse. 
 And let your very Pleasures have their Use. 
 But if you read, your Books with Prudence chuse. 
 Or Time mis-spent is worse than what you lose. 
 Be fully e er you speak your Subject known, 
 And let e en then some Diffidence be shown. 
 Keep something silent, and we think you wise, 
 But when we see the Bottom, we despise. 
 
 He that is conscious of a stink in his Breeches, is jeal 
 ous of every Wrinkle in another s Nose. 
 
 Ivove and Tooth-ach have many Cures, but none infal 
 lible, except Possession and Dispossession. 
 
208 poor IRtcbarfc for 1751 
 
 O barb rous Waggoners, your Wrath ass wage, 
 Why vent you on the generous Steed your Rage ? 
 Does not his Service earn you daily Bread ? 
 Your Wives, your Children by his Labour fed ? 
 If, as the Samian taught, the Soul revives, 
 And, shifting Seats, in other Bodies lives, 
 Severe shall be the brutal Carter s Change, 
 Doom d in a Thill-horse o er rough Roads to range ; 
 And while transformed the groaning I/>ad he draws, 
 Some Horse turn d Carter shall avenge the Cause. 
 
 There are lazy Minds as well as lazy Bodies. 
 Most People return small Favours, acknowledge mid 
 dling ones, and repay great ones with Ingratitude. 
 
 With ceaseless Streams a well-plac d Treasure flows, 
 When spent increases, and by lessening grows. 
 Sarepta s Widow, hoping no Supply, 
 Thought, on her little Store, to eat and die : 
 Soon as she welcom d her prophetic Guest, 
 The Cruse flow d liberal, and the Corn increas d, 
 Th Almighty Pow r unfailing Plenty sent, 
 The Oil unwasted, and the Meal unspent. 
 
 Fond Pride of Dress is sure an empty Curse ; 
 
 Fy re Fancy you consult, consult your Purse. 
 
 Youth is pert and positive, Age modest and doubting : 
 So Ears of Corn when young and light, stand bold up 
 right, but hang their Heads when weighty, full, and 
 ripe. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 What will not Luxury taste ? Earth, Sea, and Air, 
 Are daily ransack d for the Bill of Fare. 
 
poor IRicbaro for 1751 209 
 
 Blood stuff d in Guts is British Christian s Food, 
 
 And France robs Marshes of the croaking Brood ; 
 
 But he had sure a Palate cover d o er 
 
 With Brass or Steel, that on the rocky Shore, 
 
 First broke the oozy Oister s pearly Coat, 
 
 And risk d the living Morsel down his Throat. 
 
 T is easier to suppress the first Desire, than to satisfy 
 all that follow it. 
 
 Don t judge of Men s Wealth or Piety, by their Sunday 
 Appearances. 
 
 Friendship increases by visiting Friends, but by visit 
 ing seldom. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Vice luring, in the Way of Virtue lies, 
 God suffers this ; but tempts not ; tho He tries. 
 Go wrong, go right, t is your own Action still ; 
 He leaves you to your Choice, of Good, or 111. 
 Then chuse the Good ! the 111 submisly bear ! 
 The Man of Virtue is above Despair. 
 Safe on this Maxim with the Writer rest, 
 That all that happens, happens for the best. 
 
 If your Riches are yours, why don t you take them 
 witn you to the t other World ? 
 
 What more valuable than Gold? Diamond. Than 
 Diamonds ? Virtue. 
 To-day is Yesterday s Pupil. 
 
 Ye Party Zealots, thus it fares with you, 
 When Party Rage too warmly you pursue ; 
 Both Sides club Nonsense and impetuous Pride, 
 And Folly joins whom Sentiments divide. 
 Vol I 14 
 
210 poor IRfcbarD for 1751 
 
 You vent your Spleen as Monkeys when they pass, 
 Scratch at the mimic Monkey in the Glass, 
 While both are one ; and henceforth be it known, 
 Fools of both Sides shall stand as Fools alone. 
 
 If worldly Goods cannot save me from Death, they 
 ought not to hinder me of eternal Life. 
 
 T is great Confidence in a Friend to tell him your 
 Faults, greater to tell him his. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 Ah ! what is Life ? With Ills encompass d round, 
 Amidst our Hopes, Fate strikes the sudden Wound ; 
 To-day the Statesman of new Honour dreams, 
 To-morrow Death destroys his airy Schemes. 
 Is mouldy Treasure in thy Chest confin d ; 
 Think, all that Treasure thou must leave behind ; 
 Thy Heir with Smiles shall view thy blazon d Hearse, 
 And all thy Hoards, with lavish Hand disperse. 
 
 Talking against Religion is unchaining a Tyger ; The 
 Beast let loose may worry his Deliverer. 
 
 Ambition often spends foolishly what Avarice had 
 wickedly collected. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 Should certain Fate th impending Blow delay, 
 Thy Mirth will sicken, and thy Bloom decay ; 
 Then feeble Age will all thy Nerves disarm, 
 No more thy Blood its narrow Channels warm ; 
 Who then would wish to stretch this narrow Span, 
 To suffer Life beyond the Date of Man ? 
 The virtuous Soul pursues a nobler Aim, 
 And Life regards but as a fleeting Dream. 
 
 Pillgarlic was in the Accusative Case, and bespoke A 
 Lawyer in the Vocative, who could not understand him 
 till he made use of the Dative. 
 
fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1751 211 
 
 Great Estates may venture more ; little Boats must 
 keep near Shore. 
 
 Nice Eaters seldom meet with a good Dinner. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 She longs to wake, and wishes to get free, 
 
 To launch from Earth into ETERNITY, 
 
 For while the boundless Theme extends our Thought, 
 
 Ten thousand thousand rolling Years are nought. 
 
 O endless thought ! divine Eternity ! 
 
 Th immortal Soul shares but a Part of thee ; 
 
 For thou wert present when our Life began, 
 
 When the warm Dust shot up in breathing Man. 
 
 Not to oversee Workmen, is to leave them your Purse 
 open. 
 
 The Wise and Brave dares own that he was wrong. 
 Cunning proceeds from Want of Capacity. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Ere the Foundations of the World were laid, 
 Ere kindling Light th Almighty Word obey d, 
 Thou wert ; and when the subterraneous Flame, 
 Shall burst its Prison, and devour this Frame, 
 From angry Heav n when the keen Lightning flies, 
 When fervent Heat dissolves the melting Skies, 
 Thou still shalt be ; still as thou wert before, 
 And know no Change when Time shall be no more. 
 
 The Proud hate Pride in others. 
 Who judges best of a Man, his Enemies or himself? 
 Drunkenness, that worst of Evils, makes some men 
 Fools, some Beasts, some Devils. 
 T is not a Holiday that s not kept holy. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1752. 
 
 [PREFACE OMITTED.] 
 
 JANUARY. 
 On Publick Spirit. 
 
 Where never Science beam d a friendly Ray, 
 Where one vast Blank neglected Nature lay ; 
 From PUBLICK SPIRIT there, by Arts employ <J, 
 Creation, varying, glads the chearless Void. 
 By Arts, which Safety, Treasure and Delight, 
 On I,and, on Wave, in wondrous Works unite ! 
 Myriads made happy, Publick Spirit bless ; 
 Parent of Trade, Wealth, liberty and Peace. 
 
 Observe old Vellum ; he praises former times, as if 
 he d a mind to sell em. 
 
 Kings have long Arms, but misfortune longer : I>* 
 none think themselves out of her Reach. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Unlike where Tyranny, the Rod maintains 
 O er turfless, leafless and uncultur d Plains, 
 Here Herbs of Food and Physic, Plenty showers, 
 Gives Fruits to blush, and colours various Flowers*. 
 
poor IRicbarfc for 1752 213 
 
 Where Sands or Stony Wilds once starv d the Year, 
 I y aughs the green I^awn, and nods the golden Bar. 
 White shine the fleecy Race, which Fate shall doom, 
 The Feast of I/ife, the Treasure of the 3L,oom. 
 
 For want of a Nail the Shoe is lost ; for want of a Shoe 
 ihe Horse is lost ; for want of a Horse the Rider is lost. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 What tho no Arch of Triumph is assign d 
 
 To laurel d Pride, whose Sword has thinn d Mankind ; 
 
 Tho no vast Wall extends from Coast to Coast, 
 
 No Pyramid aspires sublimely lost. 
 
 1,0 ! stately Streets, lo ! ample Squares invite 
 
 The salutary Gale that breathes Delight. 
 
 I,o ! Structures mark the hospitable Strand, 
 
 Where Charity extends her tender Hand ; 
 
 The busy Man has few idle Visitors ; to the boiling Pot 
 the Flies come not. 
 
 Calamity and Prosperity are the Touchstones of In 
 tegrity. 
 
 Where the sick Stranger joys to find a Home, 
 Where casual 111, maim d I,abour, freely come ; 
 Those worn with Age, Infirmity or Care, 
 Find Rest, Relief, and Health returning fair. 
 There too the Walls of rising Schools ascend, 
 For PUBLICK SPIRIT still is learning s Friend, 
 Where Science, Virtue, sown with liberal Hand, 
 In future Patriots shall inspire the I^and. 
 
 The Prodigal generally does more Injustice than the 
 Covetous. 
 Generous Minds are all of kin. 
 
214 poor IRicbarfc for 1752 
 
 MAY. 
 
 And when too populous at length confess d, 
 From confluent Strangers refug d and redress d : 
 When War so long withdraws his barb rous Train, 
 That Peace o erstocks us with the Sons of Men : 
 So long Health breathes thro the pure ambient Air, 
 That Want must prey on those Disease would spare ; 
 Then will be all the gen ro us Godless seen, 
 Then most diffus d she shines, and most benign. 
 
 T is more noble to forgive, and more manly to despise, 
 than to revenge an Injury. 
 
 A Brother may not be a Friend, but a Friend will 
 always be a Brother. 
 Meanness is the Parent of Insolence. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Her Eye far piercing, round extends its Beams, 
 To Erie s Banks, or smooth Ohio s Streams, 
 It fixes where kind Rays till then have smil d, 
 (Vain Smile !) on some luxuriant houseless Wild ; 
 How many Sons of Want might here enjoy 
 What Nature gives for Age but to destroy ? 
 Blush, blush, O Sun (she cries) here vainly found 
 To rise, to set, to roll the Seasons round ! 
 
 Mankind are very odd Creatures : One Half censure 
 what they practise, the other half practise what they 
 censure ; the rest always say and do as they ought. 
 
 Severity is often Clemency ; Clemency Severity. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Shall Heav n distil in Dews, descend in Rain, 
 From Earth gush Fountains, Rivers flow in vain ? 
 1 There shall the watry Lives in Myriads stray, 
 And be, to be alone each other s Prey ? 
 
fcoor IRicbatf) for 1752 215 
 
 Unsought shall here the teeming Quarries own 
 The various Species of mechanic Stone ? 
 From Structure This, from Sculpture That confine ? 
 Shall Rocks forbid the latent Gem to shine ? 
 
 Bis dat qui cito dat : He gives twice that gives soon ; 
 i. e. he will soon be called upon to give again. 
 A Temper to bear much, will have much to bear. 
 Pride dines upon Vanity, sups on Contempt. 
 
 Shall Mines obedient aid no Artist s Care, 
 
 Nor give the martial Sword and peaceful Share ? 
 
 Ah ! shall they never precious Ore unfold. 
 
 To smile in Silver, or to flame in Gold ? 
 
 Shall here the vegetable World alone, 
 
 For Joys, for various Virtues rest unknown ? 
 
 While Food and Physic, Plants and Herbs supply, 
 
 Here must they shoot alone to bloom and die ? 
 
 Great Merit is coy, as well as great Pride. 
 
 An undutiful Daughter, will prove an unmanageable 
 Wife. 
 
 Old Boys have their Playthings as well as young Ones ; 
 the Difference is only in the Price. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 Shall Fruits, which none, but brutal Eyes survey 
 
 Untouch d grow ripe, untasted drop away ? 
 
 Shall here th irrational, the salvage Kind 
 
 Ivord it o er Stores by Heav n for Man design d, 
 
 And trample what mild Suns benignly raise, 
 
 While Man must lose the Use, and Heav n the Praise ? 
 
 Shall it then be ? (Indignant here she rose, 
 
 Indignant, yet humane, her Bosom glows.) 
 
216 poor IRtcbarfc for 1752 
 
 The too obliging Temper is evermore disobliging 
 itself. 
 
 Hold your Council before Dinner ; the full Belly hates 
 Thinking as well as Acting. 
 
 No ! By each honour d Grecian Roman Name, 
 
 By Men for Virtue Deified by Fame, 
 
 Who peopled Lands, who model d infant State, 
 
 And then bad Empire be maturely great, 
 
 By These I swear (be witness Earth and Skies ! ) 
 
 Fair Order here shall from Confusion rise, 
 
 Rapt I a future Colony survey ! 
 
 Come then, ye Sons of Mis ry ! come away ! 
 
 The Brave and the Wise can both pity and excuse 
 when Cowards and Fools shew no Mercy. 
 
 Ceremony is not Civility ; nor Civility Ceremony. 
 
 If man could have Half his Wishes, he would double 
 his Troubles. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Let Those, whose Sorrows from Neglect are known, 
 
 (Here taught compell d empower d) Neglect attone ! 
 
 Let Those enjoy (who never merit Woes) 
 
 1 In Yputh th industrious Wish, in Age Repose 1 
 
 Allotted Acres (no reluctant Soil) 
 
 Shall prompt their Industry, and pay their Toll. 
 
 Let Families, long Strangers to Delight, 
 
 Whom wayward Fate dispers d, by Me unite ; 
 
 It is ill Jesting with the Joiner s Tools, worse with the 
 Doctor s. 
 
 Children and Princes will quarrel for Trifles. 
 Praise to the undeserving, is severe Satyr. 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1752 217 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Here live enjoying Life, see Plenty, Peace ; 
 
 Their Lands encreasing as their Sons increase 1 
 
 As Nature yet is found in leafy Glades 
 
 To intermix the Walks with Lights and Shades ; 
 
 Or as with Good and 111, in chequer d Strife, 
 
 Various the Goddess colours human Life ; 
 
 So in this fertile Clime if yet are seen 
 
 Moors, Marshes, Clifis, by Turns to intervene : 
 
 Success has ruin d many a Man. 
 
 Great Pride and Meanness sure are near ally d ; Or 
 their Partitions do their Bounds divide. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 179 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 This is the twentieth Time of my address 
 ing thee in this Manner, and I have reason 
 to flatter myself my Labours have not been 
 unacceptable to the Publick. I am particularly 
 pleas d to understand that my Predictions of 
 the Weather give such general Satisfaction ; and 
 indeed such Care is taken in the Calculations, 
 on which those Predictions are founded, that I 
 could almost venture to say, there s not a 
 single One of them, promising Snow, Rain, 
 Hail, Heat, Frost, Fogs, Wind, or Thunder, 
 but what comes to pass punctually and pre 
 cisely on the very Day, in some Place or other 
 on this little diminutive Globe of Ours ; (and 
 when you consider the vast Distance of the 
 Stars from which 1(fe take Aim, you must allow 
 it no small Degree of Exactness to hit any Part 
 of it). I say on this Globe ; for though in other 
 218 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1753 219 
 
 Matters I confine the Usefulness of my Bphe- 
 meris to the Northern Colonies, yet in that 
 important Matter of the Weather, which is of 
 such general Concern, I would have it more 
 extensively useful, and therefore take in both 
 Hemispheres, and all the Latitudes from Hud 
 son s Bay to Cape Horn. 
 
 You will find this Almanack in my former 
 Method, only conformable to the New-Stile 
 established by the Act of Parliament, which 
 I gave you in my last at length ; the new Act 
 since made for Amendment of that first Act, 
 not affecting us in the least, being intended 
 only to regulate some Corporation matters in 
 England, being unprovided for. I have only 
 added a Column in the second Page of each 
 Month, containing the Days of the Old Stile 
 opposite to their corresponding Days in the 
 New, which may in many Cases, be of Use ; 
 and so conclude, (believing you will excuse 
 a short Preface, when it is to make Room for 
 something better). 
 
 Thy Friend and Servant, 
 
 R. SAUNDERS. 
 
 HYMN TO THE CREATOR, FROM PSALM CIV. 
 
 AWAKE, my Soul ! with Joy thy God adore ; 
 Declare his Greatness ; celebrate his Pow r ; 
 Who, cloth d with Honour, and with Glory crown d, 
 Shines forth, and cheers his Universe around, 
 
220 poor IRfcbaro for 1753 
 
 Who with a radient Veil of heavenly Ught 
 
 Himself conceals from all created Sight. 
 
 Who rais d the spacious Firmament on high, 
 
 And spread the azure Curtain of the Sky. 
 
 Whose awful Throne Heav n s starry Arch sustains, 
 
 Whose Presence not Heav n s vast Expanse retains. 
 
 Whose Ways unsearchable no Eye can find, 
 
 The Clouds his Chariot, and his Wings the Wind. 
 
 Whom Hosts of mighty Angels own their Lord, 
 
 And flaming Seraphim fulfil his Word. 
 
 Whose Pow r of old the solid Earth did found, 
 
 Self-pois d, self-center d, and with Strength girt round 
 
 From her appointed Sphere forbid to fly, 
 
 Or rush unbalenced thro the trackless Sky. 
 
 To reas ning Man the sov reign Rule assign d, 
 
 His Delegate o er each inferior Kind ; 
 
 Too soon to fall from that distinguish d Place, 
 
 His Honours stain d with Guilt and foul Disgrace. 
 
 He saw the Pride of Earth s aspiring Lord, 
 And in his Fury gave the dreadful Word : 
 Straight o er her peopled Plains his Floods were pour d, 
 And o er her Mountains the proud Billows roar d. 
 Athwart the Face of Earth the Deluge sweeps, 
 And whelms the impious Nations in the Deeps. 
 
 Again God spake and at his pow rful Call 
 
 The raging Floods asswage, the Waters fall, 
 The Tempests hear his Voice, and straight obey, 
 And at his Thunder s Roar they haste away : 
 From off the lofty Mountains they subside, 
 And gently thro the winding Valleys glide, 
 Till in the spacious Caverns of the Deep 
 They sink together, and in Silence sleep. 
 There he hath stretched abroad thier liquid Plains, 
 And there Omnipotence their Rage restrains, 
 That Earth no more her Ruins may deplore, 
 And guilty Mortals dread thier Wrath no more. 
 
fcoor TCtcbart) for 1753 aa 
 
 He bids the living Fountains burst the Ground, 
 Vnd bounteous spread their Silver Streams around : 
 x>own from the Hills they draw thier shining Train, 
 Diffusing Health and Bounty o er the Plain. 
 There the fair Flocks allay the Summer s Rage, 
 And panting Savages their Flame asswage, 
 On tiKnr sweet winding Banks th aerial Race 
 In artless Numbers warble forth his Praise, 
 Or chant the harmless Raptures of their Loves, 
 And cheer the Plains, and wake the vocal Groves. 
 Forth from his Treasures in the Skies he pours 
 His precious Blessings in refreshing Show rs, 
 Bach dying Plant with Joy new Life receives, 
 And thankful Nature smiles, and Earth revives. 
 The fruitful Fields with Verdure he bespreads, 
 The Table of the Race that haunts the Meads, 
 And bids each Forest, and each flow ry Plain 
 Send forth their native Physic for the Swain, 
 Thus doth the various Bounty of the Earth 
 Support each Species crowding into Birth. 
 In purple Streams she bids her Vintage flow. 
 And Olives on her Hills luxuriant grow, 
 One with its generous Juice to cheer the Heart, 
 And one illustrious Beauty to impart ; 
 And Bread of all Heav n s precious gifts the chief 
 From desolating Want the sure Relief. 
 Which with new Life the feeble Limbs inspires, 
 And all the Man with Health and Courage fires. 
 The Cloud-topt Hills with waving Woods are crown d, 
 Which wide extend thier sacred Shades around, 
 There Lebanon s proud Cedars nod their Heads ; 
 There Bashan s lofty Oaks extend thier Shades : 
 The pointed Firs rise tow 1 ring to the Clouds, 
 And Life and warbling Numbers fill the Woods. 
 
 Nor gentle Shades alone, nor verdant Plains, 
 Nor /air enamell d Meads, nor flow ry Lawns, 
 
222 fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1753 
 
 But e n rude Rocks and dreary Desarts yield 
 Retreats for the wild Wand rers of the Field. 
 The Pow r with I,ife and Sense all Nature fills, 
 Each Element with varied Being swells, 
 Race after Race arising view the Height, 
 Then silent pass away, and sink in Night. 
 The Gift of I^ife thus boundlessly bestowed, 
 Proclaims th exhaustless Hand, the Hand of God. 
 Nor less thy Glory in th etherial Spheres, 
 Nor less thy ruling Providence appears. 
 There from on high the gentle Moon by Night 
 In solemn Silence sheds her Silver I4ght, 
 And thence the glorious Sun pours forth his Beams. 
 Thence copious spreads around his quick ning Streams 
 Each various Orb enjoys the golden Day, 
 And Worlds of I/ife hang on his chearful Ray. 
 Thus lyight and Darkness their fix d Course maintain, 
 And still the kind Viccisitudes remain : 
 For when pale Night her sable Curtain spreads, 
 And wraps all Nature in her awful Shades, 
 Soft Slumbers gently seal each mortal Eye, 
 Stretch d at their Ease the weary I^ab rers lie. 
 The restless Soul midst life s vain Tumults tost, 
 Forgets her Woes and ev ry Care is lost. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Then from their Dens the rav nous Monsters creep, 
 Whilst in their Folds the harmless Bestial sleeps. 
 The furious I^ion roams in quest of Prey, 
 To gorge his Hunger till the Dawn of Day ; 
 His hideous Roar with Terror shakes the Wood, 
 As from his Maker s Hand he asks his Food. 
 Again the Sun his Morning Beams displays, 
 And fires the eastern Mountain with his Rays. 
 
 T is against some Mens Principle to pay Interest, and 
 seems against others Interest to pay the Principal. 
 
poor IRfcbarD for 1753 223 
 
 Philosophy as well as Foppery often changes Fashion. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Before him fly the Horrors of the Night ; 
 He looks upon the World and all is lyight. 
 Then the lone Wand rers of the dreary Waste 
 Affrighted to their Holes return in Haste, 
 To Man give up the World, his native Reign, 
 Who then resumes his Pow r, and rules the Plain, 
 How various are thy Works, Creator wise I 
 How to the Sight Beauties on Beauties rise ! 
 
 Setting too Good an Example is a kind of Slander sel 
 dom forgiven ; t is Scandalum Magnatum. 
 
 A great Talker may be no Fool, but he is one that 
 relies on him. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 Where Goodness worthy of a God bestows 
 
 His Gifts on all, and without Bounds o erflows ; 
 
 Where Wisdom bright appears, and Pow r divine, 
 
 And where Infinitude itself doth shine ; 
 
 Where Excellence invisible s exprest, 
 
 And in his glorious Works the God appears confest. 
 
 With Life thy Hand hath stocked this Earthly Plain 
 
 Nor less the spacious Empire of the Main. 
 
 When Reason preaches, if you don t hear her she 11 
 box your Ears. 
 It is not Leisure that is not used. 
 
 There the tall Ships the rolling Billows sweep, 
 And bound triumphant o er the unfathom d Deep. 
 There great Leviathan in regal Pride, 
 The scaly Nations crouding by his Side, 
 
424 t>oor Irttcbarfc for 
 
 Far in the deep Recesses of the Main 
 O er Nature s Wastes extends his boundless Reign. 
 Round the dark Bottoms of the Mountains roves, 
 The hoary Deep swells dreadful as he moves. 
 
 The Good-will of the Govern d will be starved, if not 
 fed by the good Deeds of the Governors. 
 Paintings and Fightings are best seen at a distance. 
 
 Now views the awful Throne of antient Night, 
 Then mounts exulting to the Realms of lyight : 
 Now launches to the Deep, now stems the Shore, 
 An Ocean scarce contains the wild Uproar. 
 Whate er of I*ife replenishes the Flood, 
 Or walks the Earth, or warbles thro the Wood, 
 In Nature s various Wants to thee complains. 
 The Hand, which gave the Life, the lyife sustains. 
 
 If you would reap Praise you must sow the Seeds, 
 gentle Words and useful Deeds. 
 
 Ignorance leads Men into a party, and Shame keeps 
 them from getting out again. 
 
 Haste makes Waste. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 To each th appointed Sustenance bestows, 
 To each the noxious and the healthful shows. 
 Thou spread s! thy Bounty meagre Famine flies : 
 Thou hid st thy Face their vital Vigour dies. 
 Thy pow rful Word again restores their Breath ; 
 Renew d Creation triumphs over Death. 
 Th Almighty o er his Works casts down his Eye, 
 And views their various Excellence with Joy ; 
 
poor IRicbarfc for 1753 225 
 
 Many have quarrel d about Religion, that never prac 
 tised it. 
 
 Sudden Pow r is apt to be insolent, Sudden Liberty 
 saucy ; that behaves best which has grown gradually. 
 
 He that best understands the World, least likes it. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 His Works with Reverence own his pow rful Hand, 
 And humble Nature waits his dread Command, 
 He looks upon the Earth her Pillars shake, 
 And from her Centre her Foundations quake. 
 The Hills he touches -Clouds of Smoke arise, 
 And sulph rous Streams mount heavy to the Skies. 
 
 Whilst Life informs this Frame, that Life shall bt 
 (O First and Greatest !) sacred all to Thee. 
 
 Anger is never without a Reason, but seldom with a 
 good One. 
 
 He that is of Opinion Money will do every Thing 
 may well be suspected of doing every Thing for Money. 
 
 An ill Wound, but not an ill Name, may be healed. 
 
 AUGUST.* 
 
 When out of Favour, none know thee ; when in, thou 
 dost not know thyself. 
 
 A lean Award is better than a fat Judgement. 
 God, Parents, and Instructors, can never be requited. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 When Nature sinks, when Death s dark Shades arise 
 And this World s Glories vanish from these Eyes ; 
 Then may the Thought of Thee be ever near. 
 To calm the Tumult, and compose the Fear. 
 
 * August poetry wanting in copy. 
 15 
 
226 fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1753 
 
 In all my Woes thy Favour my Defence ; 
 
 Safe in thy Mercy, not my Innocence, 
 
 And through what future Scenes thy Hand may guide 
 
 My wond ring Soul, and thro what States untry d. 
 
 He that builds before he counts the Cost, acts foolishly ; 
 and he that counts before he builds, finds that he did not 
 count wisely. 
 
 Patience in Market, is worth Pounds in a year. 
 
 Danger is Sauce for Prayers. 
 
 What distant Seats soe ver I may explore. 
 
 When frail Mortality shall be no more ; 
 
 If aught of meek or contrite in thy Sight 
 
 Shall fit me for the Realms of Bliss and I^ight, 
 
 Be this the Bliss of all my future Days, 
 
 To view thy Glories, and to sing thy Praise. 
 
 When the dread Hour, ordain d of old, shall come, 
 
 Which brings on stubborn Guilt its righteous Doom. 
 
 If you have no Honey in your Pot, have some in your 
 Mouth. 
 
 A Pair of good IJars will drain dry an hundred 
 Tongues. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 When Storms of Fire on Sinners shall be pour d* 
 And all th Obdurate in thy Wrath devour d ; 
 May I then hope to find a lowly Place 
 To stand the meanest of th etherial Race ; 
 Swift at thy Word to wing the liquid Sky, 
 And on thy humblest Messages to fly. 
 Howe er thy blissful Sight may raise my Soul. 
 While vast Eternitie s long Ages roll. 
 
Ifcoor IRicbarfc for 1753 227 
 
 Serving God is doing good to Man, but praying is 
 thought an easier Service, and therefore more generally 
 chosen. 
 
 Nothing humbler than Ambition, when it is about to 
 climb. 
 
 Perfection on Perfection tow ring- high, 
 Glory on Glory rais d, and Joy on Joy, 
 Each Pow r improving in the bright ning Mind, 
 To humble Virtues, lofty Knowledge join d ; 
 Be this my highest Aim, howe er I soar. 
 Before thy Footstool prostrate to adore, 
 My brightest Crown before thy Feet to lay, 
 My Pride to serve, my Glory to obey. 
 
 The discontented Man finds no easy Chair. 
 Virtue and a Trade, are a Child s best Portion. 
 Gifts much expected, are paid, not given. 
 
 HOW TO SECURE HOUSES, &C. FROM LIGHTNING. 
 
 It has pleased God in his Goodness to Man 
 kind, at length to discover to them, the Means 
 of securing their Habitations and other Build 
 ings from Mischief by thunder and lyightning. 
 The Method is this : Provide a small Iron Rod 
 (it may be of the Rod-iron used by the Nailors) 
 but of such a length, that one End being three 
 or four Feet in the moist Ground, the other 
 may be six or eight Feet above the highest Part 
 of the Building. To the upper end of the Rod 
 fasten about a Foot of Brass Wire, the size of a 
 
228 fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1753 
 
 common Knitting-needle, sharpened to a fine 
 Point ; the Rod may be secured to the House 
 by a few small Staples. If the House or Barn, 
 be long, there may be a Rod and Point at each 
 End, and a middling Wire along the Ridge 
 from one to the other. A house thus furnished 
 will not be damaged by Lightning, it being at 
 tracted by the Points, and passing thro the 
 Metal into the Ground without hurting any 
 thing. Vessels also, having a sharp pointed 
 Rod fix d on the Top of their Masts, with a 
 Wire from the Foot of the Rod reaching down, 
 round one of the Shrouds, to the Water, will 
 not be hurt by Lightning. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1754. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 KIND READER, 
 
 I have now serv d you three Apprentice 
 ships, yet, old as I am, I have no Inclination to 
 quit your Service, but should be glad to be able to 
 continue in it three times three Apprenticeships 
 longer. 
 
 The first Astrologers, I think, were honest 
 Husbandmen ; and so it seems are the last ; 
 for my brethren Jerman and Moore, and myself, 
 the only remaining Almanack makers of this 
 Country, are all of that Class : Tho in inter 
 mediate Times our Art has been cultivated in 
 great Cities, and even in the Courts of Princes ; 
 Witness History from the Days of King NEBU 
 CHADNEZZAR I. of Babylon, to those of 
 
 Queen JAMES I. of England. But you 
 
 will ask perhaps, how I prove that the first 
 
230 poor IRicbaro for 1754 
 
 Astrologers were Countrymen ? I own this 
 
 is a Matter beyond the Memory of History, for 
 Astrology was before Letters ; but I prove it 
 from the Book of the Heavens, from the Names 
 of the twelve Signs, which were mostly given 
 to remark some Circumstance relative to rural 
 Affairs, in the several successive Months of the 
 Year, and by that Means to supply the Want 
 
 of Almanacks. Thus, as the Year of the 
 
 Ancients began most naturally with the Spring, 
 Aries and Taurus, that is, the Ram and the Bull, 
 represented the successive Addition to their 
 Flocks of Sheep and Kine, by their Produce in 
 
 that Season, Lambs and Calves. Gemini 
 
 were originally the Kids, but called the Twins, 
 as Goats more commonly bring forth two than 
 
 one : These followed the Calves. Cancer, 
 
 the Crab came next, when that Kind of Fish 
 
 were in Season. Then follow d Leo, the 
 
 Lion, and Virgo, the Wench, to mark the Sum 
 mer Months, and Dog-Days, when those Crea 
 tures were most mischievous. In Autumn 
 comes first Libra, the Ballance, to point out the 
 Time for selling the Summer s Produce; or 
 rather, a Time of Leisure for holding Courts of 
 Justice in which they might plague themselves 
 and Neighbours ; I know some suppose this Sign 
 to signify the equal Poise, at that Time of Day 
 and Night ; but the other Signification is the 
 
fcoor IRicbarfc for 1754 231 
 
 truer, as plainly appears by the following Sign 
 Scorpio, or the Scorpion, with the Sting in his 
 Tail, which certainly denotes the Paying of 
 
 Costs. Then follows Sagittary, the Archer, 
 
 to show the season of Hunting ; for now the 
 Leaves being off the Trees and Bushes, the 
 Game might be more easily seen and struck 
 
 with their Arrows. The Goat accompanys 
 
 the short Days and long Nights of Winter, to 
 show the Season of Mirth, Feasting and Jollity ; 
 for what can Capricorn mean, but Dancing or 
 Cutting of Capers ? At length comes Aqua 
 rius, or the Water-bearer, to show the Season 
 of Snows, Rains and Floods ; and lastly Pisces, 
 or the two Shads, to denote the approaching 
 Return of those Fish up the Rivers : Make 
 your Wears, hawl your Seins ; Catch em and 
 pickle em, my Friends ; they are excellent Rel- 
 
 ishers of old Cyder. But if you can t get 
 
 Shad, Mackerell may do better. 
 
 I know, gentle Readers, that many of you 
 always expect a Preface and think yourselves 
 slighted if that s omitted. So here you have it, 
 and much good may t do ye. As little as it is to 
 the Purpose, there are many less so, now-a-days. 
 
 I have left out, you see, all the usual 
 
 Stuff about the Importunity of Friends, and 
 the like, or I might have made it much bigger. 
 You think, however, that t is big enough for 
 
232 poor IRicbarD tor 1754 
 
 Conscience, for any Matter of Good that s in it ; 
 
 I think so too, if it fills the Page, which is 
 
 the Needful, at present, from 
 
 Your loving Friend to serve. 
 
 R. SAUNDBRS. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 Hail, infinite CREATOR 1 with thy Praise 
 The Muse began, with thee shall end my I,ays, 
 These are thy Works, blest Architect divine ! 
 This Earth, and all this beauteous Offspring thine 
 Thy Breath first bid inactive Matter move, 
 And strait with I^ife the genial Atoms strove 
 Producing Animal, and Plant, and Flow r, 
 Concurrent proof of Wisdom and of Pow r. 
 
 The first Degree of Folly, is to conceit one s self wise ; 
 the second to profess it ; the third to despise Counsel. 
 
 Take heed of the Vinegar of sweet Wine, and the 
 Anger of Good-nature. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Thy potent Word infus d the solar Light, 
 A.nd spread the Curtain of refreshing Night ; 
 With splendid Orbs enrich d the Void profound, 
 Rang d the bright Worlds, and roll d their Courses round. 
 O sing his Praises then ! How justly due, 
 Created Kinds, the Strains of Praise from You ? 
 How grateful the deserv d Returns of lyove ! 
 Praise him thou Earth, ye Worlds that roll above, 
 Each Pow r, whole Nature, all his Works, conspire 
 Tn Songs of Praise, an Universal Choir. 
 
 The Bell calls others to Church, but itself never minds 
 the Sermon. 
 
poor IRtcbarfc tor 1754 233 
 
 Cut the Wings of your Hens and Hopes, lest they lead 
 you a weary Dance after them. 
 
 Thou SUN, Creation s pure resplendent Eye ; 
 And all ye solar Orbs that deck the Sky, 
 Round whose vast System, peopled Plane ts move. 
 Ye central Suns of numerous Earths above. 
 Praise the dread Pow r, whose Goodness ye proclaim, 
 And let your warbling Spheres attune his Name. 
 
 Thou Moon, who with thy Rays of silver lyight, 
 Dost gild the shapeless Gloom of awful Night ; 
 
 In Rivers and bad Governments, the lightest Things 
 swim at top . 
 
 The Cat in Gloves catches no Mice. 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 And you satillary Orbs on high, 
 Who kindly Beams to distant Worlds supply, 
 Hymn your Creator s Praise, whose Skill divine 
 Impower d your Mass to roll, your Globes to shine. 
 
 Ye Comets ! that in long Ellipses stray, 
 Whole Ages finishing your annual Way ; 
 Thou Darkness ! Nature s emblematic Tomb, 
 Yield him your Reverence of impressive Gloom, 
 
 In silent Praise And thou dread Space profound, 
 
 Thro all thy waste interminable Bound. 
 
 If you d know the Value of Money, go and borrow 
 some. 
 
 The Horse thinks one thing, and he that saddles him 
 another. 
 
 Love your Neighbour; yet don t pull down your 
 Hedge, 
 
234 poor IRicbarfc for 1754 
 
 Winds ! who in troubled Air your Voices raise, 
 Sweet with loud Accents in your Maker s Praise ; 
 And you, soft Breezes, that perfume the Spring, 
 Bear him a Tribute on your gentle Wing. 
 Spread it, ye pealing Thunders, round the Sky, 
 Wide as your Vollies roll, or lightnings fly. 
 Ye Meteors ! your Creator s Praises show : 
 The spangled Dew, the Cloud-reflected Bow, 
 
 When Prosperity was well mounted, she let go the 
 Bridle, and soon came tumbling out of the Saddle. 
 
 Some make Conscience of wearing a Hat in the 
 Church, who make none of robbing the Altar. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 And moist ning Show r, ye Frosts ! his Praise proclaim ; 
 The pendant Icicle s clear native Gem : 
 Hoar Mists congeal d, that dress the Meadow pale : 
 Blue Vapour, whitening Snows, and pearly Hail. 
 Praise him, ye Seasons ! Spring with youthful Face, 
 And Summer blooming with maturer Grace ; 
 Ripe Autumn clad in Vines, with Harvests crown d, 
 And Winter old his solemn Praise resound. 
 
 In the Affairs of this World Men are saved, not by 
 Faith, but by the Want of it. 
 
 Friendship cannot live with Ceremony, nor without 
 Civility. 
 
 Praise little, dispraise less. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 The Flow ry Tribes, in all their bright Array, 
 Thier lovely Forms and dazzling Hues display. 
 Ye fruitful Branches ! white with vernal Bloom, 
 In rich Oblations breathe your fresh Perfume. 
 
jpoor IRicbarfc tor 1754 235 
 
 Praise him, ye Plants ! with all your sweet Supplies ; 
 Ye od rous Herbs, in grateful Incense rise. 
 
 Insects ! that creep on Earth, or spread the Wing, 
 In Troops your tributary Homage bring. 
 
 The learned Fool writes his Nonsense in better lan 
 guage than the unlearned ; but still t is Nonsense. 
 
 A Child thinks 20 Shillings and 20 Years can scarce 
 ever be spent. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 Fowls of the upper Air ! and Brutes supirie ! 
 And Fish ! that swim the Floods, or Ocean Brine. 
 Ye Seraphims, bright flames ! ye Angel Choirs ! 
 To the lov d Theme tune all your sounding I,yres. 
 Saints ! thron d in Bliss, who once convers d below, 
 In noblest Strains your loftiest Praise bestow. 
 Man ! Image of thy Maker s moral Pow r, 
 I,ast, labour d Work of Heav n s creating Hour ; 
 
 Don t think so much of your own Cunning, as to for 
 get other Men s : A Cunning Man is overmatched by a 
 cunning Man and a Half. 
 
 Willows are weak, but they bind the Faggot. 
 
 You may give a Man an Office, but you cannot give 
 him Discretion. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 O shall his Goodness, his Indulgence move 
 No warm Returns, nor swell the Breath of I^ove ? 
 Priest of the mute Creation, He demands 
 Thier Offerings from thy consecrated Hands, 
 
 Deputed I^ord ; from thy dead Slumber part ; 
 
 I^t Nature wake, awake the Pow rs of Art, 
 
 And with exerted Force attune his Praise, 
 
 In Notes may emulate cselestial I/ays. 
 
 I^et Music her divinest Succours bring, 
 
 The breathing Flute, the Viols warbling String, 
 
236 poor IRtcbarfc for 1754 
 
 He that doth what he should not, shall feel what he 
 would not. 
 
 To be intimate with a foolish Friend, is like going to 
 Bed to a Razor. 
 
 Little Rogues easily become great Ones. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 And dulcit Voice Ye Concerts louder grow ! 
 
 I^et the shrill Trump, the deep ning Organ blow, 
 
 While with the Notes, the tremulating Ground, 
 
 And echoing Roofs, strike awful Rapture round. 
 
 Praise him each Creature, Plenitude and Space ; 
 
 Inanimate, and Things of living Race. 
 
 From the terrestrial to the Starry Pole, 
 
 Praise him his Works, and thou my prostrate Soul I 
 
 You may sometimes be much in the wrong, in owning 
 your being in the right. 
 Friends are the true Scepters of Princes. 
 Where Sense is wanting, everything is wanting. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Thus while in vain the wretched human Brood, 
 Pursue on Earth a false, imagin d Good ; 
 That Good, which Creatures never can bestow, 
 With him still only found from whom they flow ; 
 While Gold or I^ust, with a deceitful Bribe, 
 Tempt to sure Woes the easy list ning Tribe ; 
 While Faction leads th unsteady Herd aside, 
 And Vanity perverts the Son of Pride ; 
 
 Many Princes sin with David, but few repent with 
 him. 
 
 He that hath no Ill-Fortune will be troubled with 
 good. 
 
fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1754 237 
 
 For Age and Want save while you may ; 
 No morning Sun lasts a whole Day. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Would I from Vice, from lyuxury remove, 
 Conversing with the Themes of heav nly I^ove. 
 These shall my Hours of Virtuous I^ife amuse, 
 Cheer its dull Glooms, and brighter Hopes infuse ; 
 Pleas d the lov d Visit frequent to renew, 
 While certain Bliss my rais d Desires pursue, 
 To meditate my Maker, and my I,ays 
 Tune to his Pow r who gave me Breath to praise. 
 
 ^earning to the Studious ; Riches to the Careful : 
 Power to the Bold ; Heaven to the Virtuous. 
 Now glad the Poor with Christmas Cheer ; 
 Thank God you re able so to end the Year. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1755. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 It is a common saying, that One Half of 
 the World does not know how the other Half lives. 
 To add somewhat to your knowledge in that 
 Particular, I gave you in a former Almanack, 
 an Account of the manner of living at Hudson* s- 
 Bay, and the Effects produced by the excessive 
 Cold of that Climate, which seetn d so strange to 
 some of you, that it was taken for a Romance, tho 
 
 really authentick. In this, I shall give you 
 
 some idea of a Country under the Torrid Zone, 
 which for the Variety of its Weather (where one 
 would naturally expect the greatest Uniformity) 
 s extreamly remarkable. The Account is ex 
 tracted from the Journal of Monsieur Bouguer, 
 one of the French Academicians, sent by their 
 King to measure a Degree of latitude under 
 238 
 
poor IRfcbarfc for 1755 239 
 
 the Equinoctial, in order to settle a Dispute 
 between the English and French Philosophers 
 concerning the Shape of the Earth, others 
 being at the same Time sent for the same Pur 
 pose to Lapland, under the Polar Circle. - - - 
 The Mountains in that Country are so lofty, that 
 the highest we have, being compared to them, 
 are mere Mole-hills. This Extract relates 
 chiefly to the Country among those Mountains. 
 The Method of this Almanack is the same I 
 have observed for some Years past ; only in the 
 third Column the names of some of the principal 
 fixed Stars are put down against those Days on 
 which they come to the Meridian at nine a 
 Clock in the Evening, whereby those unac 
 quainted, may learn to know them. I am, 
 Your obliged Friend and Servant, 
 
 R. SAUNDERS. 
 
 THE HAPPY MAN. 
 
 Sure Peace is his : A solid Life, estranged 
 To Disappointment and fallacious Hope, 
 Rich in Content. THOMSON 
 
 Happy the man, who free from noisy Sports, 
 And all the Pomp and Pageantry of Courts : 
 Far from the venal World can live secure, 
 
 Be moral, honest, virtuous tho but poor, 
 
 Who walking still by Equity s just Rules, 
 Detesting sordid knaves, and flattering Fools : 
 Regarding neither Fortune, Pow r, nor State 
 Nor ever wishing to be vainly great. 
 
240 poor IRicbarfc for 1755 
 
 Without Malevolence and Spleen can live, 
 
 And what his neighbour wants, with Joy would give 
 
 A Foe to Pride, no Passion s guilty Friend, 
 
 Obeying Nature, faithful to her E)nd ; 
 
 Severe in Manners, as in Truth severe, 
 
 Just to himself, and to his Friends sincere ; 
 
 His temper even, and his steady Mind 
 
 Refin d by Friendship, and by Books refin d. 
 
 Some low roof d Cottage holds the happy Swain, 
 
 Unknown to L,ux ry, or her servile Train ; 
 
 He studying Nature grows serenely wise, 
 
 l,ike Socrates he lives, or like him dies. 
 
 He asks no Glory gain d by hostile Arms, 
 
 Nor sighs for Grandeur with her pointed Charms. 
 
 With calm IndifPrence views the shifting Scene, 
 
 Thro all magnanimous, resign d, serene. 
 
 On Hope sustain d he treads life s devious Road, 
 
 And knows no Fear, except the Fear of GOD. 
 
 Would Heav n indulgent grant my fond Desire, 
 
 Thus would I live, and thus should L/ife expire. 
 
 EPITAPH ON A WORTHY CLERGYMAN. 
 
 Still like his Master, known by breaking Bread, 
 The Good he entertained, the needy fed ; 
 Of Humour easy, and of Life unblam d, 
 The Friend delighted, while the Priest reclaimed 
 The Friend, the Father, and the Husband gone, 
 The Priest still lives in this recording Stone ; 
 Where pious Eyes may read his Praises o er, 
 And learn each Grace his Pulpit taught before. 
 
 EPITAPH ON ANOTHER CLERGYMAN. 
 
 Here lies, who need not here be nam d, 
 For Theologic Knowledge f am 1 d ; 
 Who all the Bible had by rote, 
 With all the Comments Calvin wrote: 
 
poor IRfcbarfc for 1755 24* 
 
 Parsons and Jesuits could confute, 
 Talk Infidels and Quakers mute, 
 To every Heretick afoe; 
 Was he an honest man ? - - - - So, so. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 The Farmer. 
 
 O happy he 1 happiest of mortal men ! 
 
 Who far remov d from Slavery, as from Pride, 
 
 Fears no Man s Frown, nor cringing -waits to catch 
 
 The gracious nothing of a great Man s Nod ; 
 
 Where the lac d Beggar bustles for a Bride, 
 
 The Purchase of his Honour ; where Deceit, 
 
 And Fraud, and Circumvention, drest in Smiles. 
 
 A Man without a Wife, is but half a Man. 
 
 Speak little, do much. 
 
 He that would travel much, should eat little. 
 
 FEBRUARY, 
 
 Hold shameful Commerce, and beneath the Mask 
 
 Of Friendship and Sincerity, betray. 
 
 Him, nor the stately Mansion s gilded Pride, 
 
 Rich with whate er the imitative Arts, 
 
 Painting or Sculpture, yield to charm the Eye ; 
 
 Nor shining Heaps of massy Plate, enwrought 
 
 With curious, costly Workmanship, allure. 
 
 Tempted nor with the Pride nor Pomp of Power, 
 When the Wine enters, out goes the Truth. 
 If you would be loved, love and be loveable. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 Nor Pageants of Ambition, nor the Mines 
 Of grasping Av rice, nor the poison d Sweets 
 Of pamper d I^uxury, he plants his Foot 
 With Firmness on his old paternal Fields, 
 16 
 
242 poor IRfcbart for 1755 
 
 And stands unshaken. There sweet Prospects rise 
 Of Meadows smiling in their flow ry Pride, 
 Green Hills and Dales, and Cottages embower d, 
 The Scenes of Innocence, and calm Delight. 
 
 Ask and have, is sometimes dear buying. 
 The hasty Bitch brings forth blind Puppies. 
 
 There the wild Melody of warbling Birds, 
 
 And cool refreshing Groves, and murmuring Springs, 
 
 Invite to sacred Thought, and lift the Mind 
 
 From low Pursuits, to meditate the God ! 
 
 RURAL LIFE IN AN HIGHER CLASS. 
 
 But sing, O Muse ! the Swain, the happy Swain, 
 Whom Taste and Nature leading o er his Fields, 
 
 Where there is Hunger, I,aw is not regarded ; and 
 where L,aw is not regarded, there will be Hunger. 
 Two dry Sticks will burn a green One. 
 
 MAY. 
 
 Conduct to every rural Beauty. See ! 
 Before his Footsteps winds the waving Walk, 
 Here gently rising, there descending flow 
 Thro the tall Grove, or near the Water s Brink, 
 Where Flow rs besprinkled paint the shelving Bank 
 And weeping Willows bend to kiss the Stream. 
 Now wand ring o er the I,awn he roves, and now 
 Beneath the Hawthorn s secret Shade reclines ; 
 
 The honest Man takes Pains, and then enjoys Pleas 
 ures ; the knave takes Pleasure, and then suffers Pains. 
 
 Think of three Things, whence you came, where you 
 are going, and *o whom you must account 
 
poor IRtcbarS for 1755 245 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Where purple Violets hang their bashful Heads, 
 Where yellow Cowslips, and the blushing Pink, 
 Their mingled Sweets, and lovely Hues combine. 
 Here, shelter d from the North, his ripening Fruits 
 Display their sweet Temptations from the Wall, 
 Or from the gay Espalier ; while below, 
 His various Esculence, from glowing Beds, 
 Give the Fair Promise of delicious Feasts. 
 
 Necessity has no Law ; Why ? Because t is not to be 
 had without Money. 
 
 There was never a good knife made of bad Steel. 
 The Wolf sheds his Coat once a Year, his Disposition 
 
 never. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 There from his forming Hand new Scenes arise, 
 The fair Creation of his Fancy s Eye. 
 I,o ! bosom d in the solemn shady Grove, 
 Whose rev rend Branches wave on yonder Hill, 
 He views the Moss-grown Temple s ruin d Tower, 
 Cover d with creeping Ivy s cluster d Leaves, 
 The Mansion seeming of some rural God, 
 Whom Nature s Chorister s, in untaught Hymns 
 
 Who is wise ? He that learns from every One. 
 Who is powerful ? He that governs his Passions. 
 Who is rich ? He that is content. 
 Who is that ? Nobody. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 Of wild yet sweetest Harmony, adore. 
 From the bold Brow of that aspiring Steep, 
 Where hang the nibbling Flocks, and view below, 
 Their downward Shadows in the glassy Wave, 
 What pleasing Landscapes spread before his Eye. 
 Of scatter d Villages, and winding Streams, 
 
244 poor Uttcbarfc for 1755 
 
 And meadows green, and Woods, and distant Spires, 
 Seeming, above the blue Horizon s Bound, 
 
 A full Belly brings forth every Evil. 
 
 The Day is short, the Work great, the Workman lazy, 
 the Wages high, the Master urgeth ; Up, then, and be 
 doing. 
 
 The doors of Wisdom are never shut. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 To prop the Canopy of Heaven. Now lost 
 
 Amidst a blooming Wilderness of Shrubs, 
 
 The golden Orange, Arbute evergreen, 
 
 The early blooming Almond, feathery Pine, 
 
 Fair Opulus,* to Spring, to Autumn dear, 
 
 And the sweet Shades of varying Verdure, caught. 
 
 Much Virtue in Herbs, little in Men. 
 The Master s Eye w in do more Work than both his 
 Hands. 
 
 When you taste Honey, remember Gall. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 From soft Acacia s gently waving Branch, 
 Heedless he wanders ; while the grateful Scents 
 Of Sweet-briar, Roses, Honeysuckles wild, 
 Regale the Smell ; and to th enchanted Eye 
 Mezareoris purple Laurustinus white, 
 And pale Laburnum s pendent Flow rs display 
 Their diff rent Beauties. O er.the smooth shorn Grass 
 His lingering Footsteps leisurely proceed, 
 
 Being ignorant is not so much a Shame, as being un 
 willing to learn. 
 
 God gives all Things to Industry. 
 
 An hundred Thieves cannot strip one naked Man. 
 especially if his Skin s off. 
 
 * The Gelder Rose. 
 
Ipoor IRlcbarD for 1755 245 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 In Meditation deep : When, hark ! the Sound 
 
 Of Distant Water steals upon his Ejar ; 
 
 And sudden opens to his pausing F*ye 
 
 The rapid rough Cascade, from the rude Rock 
 
 Down dashing in a Stream of lucid Foam : 
 
 Then glides away, meand ring o er the I^awn, 
 
 A liquid Surface ; shining seen afar, 
 
 At Intervals, beneath the shadowy Trees ; 
 
 Diligence overcomes Difficulties, Sloth makes them. 
 Neglect mending a small Fault, and t will soon be a 
 great One. 
 Bad Gains are truly Bosses. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Till lost and bury d in the distant Grove. 
 Wrapt into sacred Musing, he reclines 
 Beneath the Covert of embow ring Shades ; 
 And, painting to his Mind the bustling Scenes 
 Of Pride and bold Ambition, pities Kings. 
 
 A long I,ife may not be good enough, but a good lyife 
 is long enough. 
 
 Be at War with your Vices, at Peace with your Neigh 
 bours, and let every New- Year find you a better Man. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1756. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTKOUS READER, 
 
 I suppose my Almanack may be worth tlie 
 Money thou hadst paid for it, hadst thou no other 
 Advantage from it, than to find the Day of the 
 Month, the remarkable Days, the Changes of 
 the Moon, the Sun and Moons Rising and Set 
 ting, and to foreknow the Tides and the 
 Weather ; these, with other Astronomical Curi 
 osities, I have yearly and constantly prepared 
 for thy Use and Entertainment, during now 
 near two Revolutions of the Planet Jupiter. 
 But I hope this is not all the Advantage thou 
 hast reaped ; for with a View to the Improve 
 ment of thy Mind and thy Estate, I have 
 constantly interspers d in every little Vacancy, 
 Moral Hints, Wise Sayings, and Maxims of 
 
poor IRicbarD for 175$ 247 
 
 Thrift, tending to impress the Benefits aris 
 ing from Honesty, Sobriety, Industry and Fru 
 gality ; which if those hast duly observed, it is 
 highly probable thou art wiser and richer many 
 fold more than the Fence my Labours have cost 
 thee. Howbeit, I shall not therefore raise my 
 Price because thou art better able to pay ; but 
 being thankful for past Favours, shall endeavor 
 to make my little Book more worthy thy Re 
 gard, by adding to those Recipes which were 
 intended to Cure the Mind, some valuable 
 Ones regarding the Health of the Body. They 
 are recommended by the skilful, and by suc 
 cessful Practice. I wish a Blessing may attend 
 the Use of them, and to thee all Happiness, 
 being 
 
 Thy obliged Friend, 
 
 R. SAUNDBRS. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 ASTRONOMY, hail, Science heavenly born ! 
 Thy Schemes, the Ijfe assist, the Mind adorn. 
 To changing Seasons give determin d Space, 
 And fix to Hours and Years their measur d Race 
 The point ng Dial, on whose figur d Plane, 
 Of Times still Flight we Notices obtain ; 
 The Pendulum, dividing lesser Parts, 
 Their Rise acquire from thy inventive Arts. 
 
 A Change of Fortune hurts a wise Man no more than 
 a Change of the Moon. 
 
243 jpoor IRicbarD for 1756 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 th acute Geographer, th Historian sage 
 
 By thy Discov ries clear the doubtful Page 
 
 From marked Eclipses, Longitude perceive, 
 
 Can settle Distances, and ^ra s give. 
 
 Prom his known Shore the Seaman distant far 
 
 Steers safely guided by thy Polar Star ; 
 
 Nor errs, when Clouds and Storms obscure its Ray, 
 
 His Compass marks him as exact a Way. 
 
 Does Mischief, Misconduct, and Warning displease ye ; 
 Think there s a Providence t will make ye easy. 
 Mine is better than Ours. 
 
 When frequent Travels had th instructive Chart 
 
 Supply d the Prize of Philosophic Art ! 
 
 Two curious mimic Globes, to Crown the Plan, 
 
 Were form d ; by his CREATOR S Image, Man. 
 
 The First, with Heav ns bright Constellation vast, 
 
 Rang d on the Surface, with th Earth s Climes the last 
 
 Copy of this by human Race possest 
 
 Which I^ands indent, and spacious Seas invest. 
 
 I/ove your Enemies, for they tell you your Faults. 
 He that has a Trade has an Office of Profit and Honour. 
 
 The Wit of Conversation consists more in finding it in 
 others, than shewing a great deal yourself. He who 
 goes out of your Company pleased with his own Face- 
 tiousness and Ingenuity, will the sooner come into it 
 again. Most men had rather please than admire you, 
 and seek less to be instructed and diverted, than approved 
 and applauded, and it is certainly the most delicate Sort 
 of Pleasure, to please another. 
 
poor IRicbarfc for 1756 249 
 
 But that sort of Wit, which employs itself insolently 
 in Criticizing and Censuring the Words and Sentiments 
 of others in Conversation, is absolute Folly; for it an 
 swers none of the Bnds of Conversation. He who uses 
 it neither improves others, is improved himself, or pleases 
 any one. 
 
 APRIL. 
 
 Fram d on imaginary Poles to move, 
 With I^ines and different Circles mark d above, 
 The pleasur d Sense, by this Machine can tell, 
 In what Position various Nations dwell : 
 Round the wide Orb s exterior Surface spread ; 
 How side-ways some the solid Convex tread : 
 While a more sever d Race of busy Pow rs 
 Project, with strange Reverse, their Feet to ours. 
 
 Be civil to all ; sociable to many ; familiar with few ; 
 Friend to one ; enemy to none. 
 Vain-glory flowereth, but beareth no Fruit. 
 
 As I spent some Weeks last Winter, in visiting my old 
 Acquaintance in the Jerseys, great Complaints I heard for 
 Want of money, and that leave to make more Paper Bills 
 could not be obtained. Friends and Countrymen, my Ad 
 vice on this Head shall cost you nothing, and if you will 
 not be angry with me for giving it, I promise you not to 
 be offended if you do not take it. 
 
 You spend yearly at least two hundred thousand pounds , 
 it is said, in Kuropean, Bast-Indian and West-Indian 
 commodities. Supposing one half of this expense to be 
 in things absolutely necessary, the other half may be 
 called superfluities, or, at best, conveniences, which, 
 however, you might live without for one little year, and 
 not suffer exceedingly. Now to save this half, observe 
 these few directions ; 
 
250 jpoor IRicbarD for 1756 
 
 1. When you incline to have new clothes, look first 
 well over the old ones, and see if you cannot shift with 
 them another year, either by scouring, mending, or even 
 patching if necessary. Remember, a patch on your 
 coat, and money in your pocket, is better and more 
 creditable, than a writ on your back, and no money to 
 take it off. 
 
 2. When you incline to buy China ware, Chinees, 
 India silks, or any other of their flimsy, slight manufac 
 tures, I would not be so hard with you, as to insist on 
 your absolutely resolving against it ; all I advise is, to put 
 it off (as you do your repentance) till another year, and 
 this, in some respects, may prevent an occasion for 
 repentance. 
 
 3. If you are now a drinker of punch, wine or tea, 
 twice a day, for the ensuing year drink them but once a 
 day. If you now drink them but once a day, do it but 
 every other day. If you now do it but once a week, 
 reduce the practice to once a fortnight. And, if you do 
 not exceed in quantity as you lessen the times, half your 
 expense in these articles will be saved. 
 
 4. When you incline to drink rum, fill the glass half 
 with water. 
 
 Thus at the year s end, there will be a hundred thou 
 sand pounds more money in your country. 
 
 If paper money in ever so great a quantity could be 
 made, no man could get any of it without giving some 
 thing for it. But all he saves in this way, will be his own 
 for nothing, and his country actually so much richer. 
 Then the merchant s old and doubtful debts may be 
 honestly paid off, and trading become surer thereafter, 
 f not so extensive. 
 
 So on the Apple s smooth suspended Ball, 
 (If greater we may represent by small) 
 
Ipoor IRfcbarD for 1756 251 
 
 The swarming Flies their reptile Tribes divide, 
 
 And cling Antipodal on every side. 
 
 Hence pleasant Problems may the mind discern 
 
 Of ev ry Soil their length of Days to learn ; 
 
 Can tell when round, to each fix d Place, shall come 
 
 Faint Dawn, Meridian lyight, or Midnight Gloom. 
 
 I^aws too gentle are seldom obeyed ; too severe, seldom 
 executed. 
 
 Trouble springs from Idleness ; Toil from Kase. 
 I/ove and be loved. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 These gifts to astronomic Art we owe, 
 Its Use extensive, yet its Growth by slow. 
 If back we look on ancient Sages Schemes, 
 They seem ridiculous as Childrens Dreams ; 
 How shall the Church, that boasts unerring Truth, 
 Blush as the Raillery of each modern Youth. 
 When told her Pope, of Heresy arraign d 
 The Sage, who garth s Rotation once rnaintain d? 
 
 A wise Man will desire no more than what he may get 
 justly, use soberly, distribute chearfully and leave con 
 tentedly. 
 
 The diligent Spinner has a large Shift. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 Vain Epicurus, and his frantic Class, 
 Misdeem d our Globe a plane quadrangle Mass ; 
 A fine romantic Terras, spread in Slate, 
 On central Pillars that support its Weight 
 I,ike Indian Sophs, who this terrestrial Mould 
 Affirm, four sturdy FJephants uphold. 
 The Sun, new every morn, flat, small of Size, 
 Just what it measures to the naked Byes. 
 
252 poor TRtcbarD for 1756 
 
 A false Friend and a Shadow attend only while the 
 Sun shines. 
 
 To-morrow every Fault is to be amended ; but that To 
 morrow never comes. 
 
 It is observable that God has often called Men to 
 Places of Dignity and Honour, when they have been 
 busy in the honest Employment of their Vocation. 
 Saul was seeking his Father s Asses, and David keeping 
 his Father s Sheep, when called to the kingdom. The 
 Shepherds were feeding their Flocks, when they had 
 their glorious Revelation. God called the four Apostles 
 from their Fishery, and Matthew from the Receipt of 
 Custom ; Amos from among the Horsemen of Tekoah, 
 Moses from keeping Jethro s Sheep, Gideon from the 
 Threshing Floor, etc. God never encourages Idleness, 
 and despises not Persons in the meanest Employments. 
 
 As pos d the Stagyrite s dark School appears, 
 Perplex d with Tales devis d of Chrystal Spheres 
 Strange solid Orbs, and Circles oddly fram d 
 Who with Philosophy their Reveries nam d. 
 How long did Ptolmfs dark Riddle spread 
 With Doubts deep puzzling each scholastic Head 
 Till, like the Theban wise in story fam d, 
 COPBNICUS that Sphynxian Monster sham d. 
 
 Plough deep while Sluggard sleep ; 
 
 And you shall have Corn to sell and to keep. 
 
 He that sows Thorns should never go barefoot. 
 
 He the true Planetary system taught, 
 
 Which the learn d Samian first from Egypt brought; 
 
poor HMcbarfc for 1756 253 
 
 L,ong from the World conceal d, in Error lost, 
 Whose rich Recovery latest Times shall boast. 
 Then TYCHO rose, who with incessant Pains, 
 In their due Ranks replac d the stony Trains 
 His Labours by a fresh Industry mov d, 
 Helvelius, Flamstead, Halley, since improv d. 
 
 Laziness travels so slowly that Poverty soon overtakes 
 him. 
 
 Sampson with his strong Body, had a weak Head, or 
 he would not have laid it in a Harlot s lap. 
 
 The Lyncean GALILEO then aspires 
 Thro the rais d Tube to mark the Stellar fires I 
 The Gallaxy with clustering Lights overspread, 
 The new-nam d Stars in bright Orions Head, 
 The varying Phases circling Planets show 
 The Solar Spots, his Fame was first to know. 
 Qtjoves Attendants, Orbs till then unknown, 
 Himself the big discovery claims alone. 
 
 When a Friend deals with a Friend, Let the bargain be 
 clear and well penn d, That they may continue Friends 
 to the End. 
 
 He that never eats too much, will never be lazy. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Cassini next, and Huygens, like renown d, 
 
 The moons and wondrous Ring of Saturn found 
 
 Sagacious KEPLER, still advancing saw 
 
 The elliptic motion, Natures plainest Law, 
 
 That Universal acts thro every Part. 
 
 This laid the Basis of Newtonian Art. 
 
 NEWTON ! vast mind ! whose piercing Pow rs apply d 
 
254 fcoor IRtcbarfc for 1756 
 
 The secret Cause of Motion first descry d ; 
 Found Gravitation was the primal Spring 
 That wheel d the Planets round their central King. 
 
 To be proud of Knowledge, is to be blind with lyight ; 
 To be proud of Virtue, is to poison yourself with the 
 Antidote. 
 
 Get what you can, and what you get, hold ; 
 
 Tis the Stone that will turn all your I^ead into Gold. 
 
 There is really a great Difference in Things sometimes 
 where there seems to be but little Distinction in 
 Names. The Man of Honour is an internal, the Person 
 of Honour an external, the one a real, the other a fic 
 titious, Character. A Person of Honour may be a profane 
 libertine, penurious, proud, may insult his inferiors, 
 and defraud his Creditors ; but it is impossible for a 
 Man of Honour to be guilty of any of these. The Person 
 of Honour may flatter for Court Favours, or cringe for 
 Popularity ; he may be for or against his Country s 
 Good, as it suits his private Views. But the M*n of 
 Honour can do none of these. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Mysterious Impulse ! that more clear to know 
 
 Exceeds the finite Reach of Art below. 
 
 Forbear, bold mortal ! t is an impious Aim 
 
 Own God immediate acting thro the frame. 
 
 Tis He, unsearchable, in all resides ; 
 
 He the FIRST CAUSE their Operations guides 
 
 Fear on his awful Privacy to press 
 
 But, honouring HIM, thy Ignorance confess. 
 
 An honest Man will receive neither Money nor Praise 
 that is not his due. 
 
poor IRicbard for 1756 255 
 
 Saying and Doing have quarrel d and parted. 
 Tell me my Faults, and mend your own. 
 
 Well, my friend, thou art just entering- the last Month 
 of another year. If thou art a Man of Business, and of 
 prudent Care, be like thou wilt now settle thy accounts, 
 to satisfy thyself whether thou has gain d or lost in the 
 Year past, and how much of either, the better to regulate 
 thy future Industry or thy common Expenses. This is 
 commendable But it is not all. Wilt thou not examine 
 also thy moral Accompts, and see what improvements 
 thou hast made in the Conduct of I,ife, what Vice sub 
 dued, what Virtue acquired ; how much better, and how 
 much wiser, as well as how much richer thou art grown ? 
 What shall it profit a Man, if he gain the whole World, 
 but lose his own Soul. Without some Care in this Matter, 
 tho thou may st come to count thy thousands, thou wilt 
 possibly still appear poor in the Eyes of the Discerning^ 
 sven here, and be really so for ever hereafter. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 1757. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 As no temporal Concern is of more Impor 
 tance to us than Health, and that depends so 
 much on the Air we every Moment breathe, the 
 Choice of a good wholesome Situation to fix a 
 Dwelling in, is a very serious Affair to every 
 Countryman about to begin the World, and well 
 worth his Consideration, especially as not only 
 the Comfort of Living, but even the Necessaries 
 of Life, depend in a great Measure upon it ; 
 since a Family frequently sick can rarely if ever 
 thrive. - - - - The following Extracts there 
 fore from a late Medical Writer, Dr. Pringle, on 
 that Subject, will, I hope, be acceptable and 
 useful to some of my Readers. 
 
 I hear that some have already, to their great 
 Advantage, put in Practice the Use of Oxen 
 recommended in my last. - - - - T is a Pleasure 
 
poor IRtcbarfc for 1757 257 
 
 to me to be in any way serviceable in commu 
 nicating useful Hints to the Publick ; and I 
 shall be obliged to others for affording me the 
 Opportunity of enjoying that Pleasure more 
 frequently, by sending me from time to time 
 such of their own Observations, as may be ad 
 vantageous if published in the Almanack. 
 I am thy obliged Friend, 
 
 RICHARD SAUNDERS. 
 
 How to make a STRIKING SUNDIAL, by 
 which not only a Man s own Family, but all his 
 Neighbours for ten Miles round, may know 
 what a Clock it is, when the Sun shines, with 
 out seeing the Dial. 
 
 Chuse an open Place in your Yard or Garden, 
 on which the Sun may shine all Day without 
 any Impediment from Trees or Buildings. On 
 the Ground mark out your Hour Lines, as for a 
 horizontal Dial, according to Art, taking Room 
 enough for the Guns. On the Line for One 
 o Clock, place one Gun ; on the Two o Clock 
 Line two Guns, and so of the rest. The Guns 
 must all be charged with Powder, but Ball is 
 unnecessary. Your Gnomon or Style must 
 have twelve burning Glasses anrex t to it, and 
 be so placed that the Sun shining through the 
 Glasses, one after the other, shall cause the 
 focus or burning Spot to fall on the Hour Line 
 17 
 
2s8 poor tttcbaro for 1757 
 
 of One, for Example, at One a Clock, and there 
 kindle a Train of Gunpowder that shall fire 
 one Gun. At Two a Clock, a Focus shall fall 
 on the Hour lyine of Two, and kindle another 
 Train that shall discharge two Guns succes 
 sively : and so of the rest. 
 
 Note, There must be 78 Guns in all. Thirty- 
 two Pounders will be best for this Use ; but 18 
 Pounders may do, and will cost less, as well as 
 use less Powder, for nine Pounds of Powder will 
 do for one Charge of each eighteen Pounder, 
 whereas the Thirty-two Pounders would require 
 for each Gun 16 Pounds. 
 
 Note also, That the chief Expense will be the 
 Powder, for the Cannon once bought, will, with 
 Care, last 100 Years. 
 
 Note moreover, that there will be a great Sa 
 ving of Powder in Cloudy Days. 
 
 Kind Reader, Methinks I hear thee say, That 
 is indeed a good Thing to know how the Time 
 passes, but this Kind of Dial, notwithstanding 
 the mentioned Savings, would be very Expen 
 sive ; and the Cost greater than the Advantage ; 
 Thou art wise, my Friend, to be so considerate 
 beforehand ; some Fools would not have found 
 out so much, till they had made the Dial and 
 try d it. - - - - Let all such learn that many a 
 private and many a publick Project, are like 
 this Striking Dial, great Cost for little Profit 
 
poor IRfcbarfc for 1757 259 
 
 JANUARY. 
 CONVERSATION HINTS. 
 
 Good Sense and Learning may Esteem obtain. 
 Humor and Wit a Laugh, if rightly ta en ; 
 Fair Virtue Admiration may impart ; 
 But t is GOOD-NATURE) only wins the Heart ; 
 It moulds the Body to an easy Grace, 
 And brightens every Feature of the Face ; 
 It smooths th unpolished Tongue with Eloquence, 
 And adds Persuasion to the finest Sense. 
 
 He that would rise at Court, must begin by creeping. 
 Many a Man s own Tongue gives Evidence against his 
 Understanding. 
 Nothing dries sooner than a Tear. 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 Would you both please, and be instructed too, 
 The pride of shewing forth yourself subdue. 
 Hear every Man upon his fav rite Theme, 
 And ever be more knowing than you seem. 
 The lowest Genius will afford some Light, 
 Or give a Hint that had escaped your Sight. 
 Doubt, till he thinks you on Conviction yield, 
 And with fit Questions let each Pause be fill d. 
 And the most knowing will ith Pleasure grant, 
 You re rather much reserv d than ignorant. 
 
 T is easier to build two Chimneys than maintain one 
 In Fuel. 
 Anger warms the Invention, but overheats the Oven. 
 
 RULES OF LAW FIT TO BE OBSERVED IN PURCHASING. 
 
 From an old Book. 
 
 First, see the Land which thou intend st to buy 
 Within the Sellers title clear doth lie. 
 
6o fcoor IRtcbarfc for 1757 
 
 And that no Woman to it doth lay claim 
 
 By Dowry, Jointure, or some other Name. 
 
 That it may cumber. Know if bound or free 
 
 The Tenure stand, and that from each Feoffee 
 
 It be released : That the Seller be so old 
 
 That he may lawful sell, thou lawful hold. 
 
 Have special Care that it not mortgag d lie, 
 
 Nor be entailed on Posterity. 
 
 Then if it stand in Statute bound or no : 
 
 Be well advised what Quit Rent out must go ; 
 
 What Custom, Service hath been done of old, 
 
 By those who formerly the same did hold, 
 
 And if a wedded Woman put to Sale, 
 
 Deal not with her, unle.ss she bring her Male. 
 
 For she doth under Covert-Baron go, 
 
 Altho sometimes some also traffick so. 
 
 Thy Bargain being made, and all this done, 
 
 Have special Care to make thy Charter run 
 
 To thee, thine Heirs, Executors, Assigns, 
 
 For that beyond thy L,ife securely binds. 
 
 These Things foreknown and done, you may prevent 
 
 Those Things rash Buyers many times repent. 
 
 And yet, when as you have done all you can 
 
 If you d be sure, deal with an honest Man. 
 
 Very good Rules, these, and sweetly sung. If they are 
 learnt by heart, and repeated often to keep them in 
 Memory, they may happen to save the Purchaser more 
 Tence than the Price of my Almanack. In Imitation of 
 this old Writer, I have thoughts of turning Coke s Insti 
 tutes, and all our Province Laws into Metre, hoping 
 thereby to engage some of our young Lawyers and old 
 Justices to read a little. 
 
 It is generally agreed to be Folly, to hazard the loss of 
 a Friend, rather than to lose a Jest. But few consider how 
 easily a Friend may be thus lost. Depending on the 
 
jpoor IRlcbavD tor 1757 261 
 
 known Regard their Friends have for them, Jesters take 
 more Freedom, with Friends than they would dare to do 
 with others, little thinking how much deeper we are 
 wounded by an Affront from one we love. But the 
 strictest Intimacy can never warrant Freedoms of this 
 Sort ; and it is indeed preposterous to think they should ; 
 unless we can suppose Injuries are less Evils when they 
 are done to us by Friends, than when they come from 
 ither Hands. 
 
 MARCH. 
 
 The Rays of Wit gild wheresoe er they strike, 
 But are not therefore fit for all alike 
 They charm the lively, but the grave offend 
 And raise a Foe as often as a Friend ; 
 Ivike the resistless Beams of blazing lyight, 
 That cheer the strong, and pain the weekly sight 
 If a bright Fancy therefore be your Share 
 Let Judgment watch it with a Guardian s care. 
 
 It is Ill-manners to silence a Fool, and Cruelty to let 
 him go on. 
 Scarlet, Silk and Velvet have put out the Kitchen Fire< 
 
 T is like a Torrent, apt to overflow, 
 
 Unless by constant Government kept low ; 
 
 And ne er inefficacious passes by, 
 
 But overturns or gladdens all that s nigh. 
 
 Or else, like Trees, when suffer d wild to shoot, 
 
 That put forth much, but all unripen d Fruit; 
 
 It turns to Affection and Grimace, 
 
 As like to Wit as Gravity to Grace. 
 
 He that would catch Fish, must venture his Bait. 
 Men take more pains to mask than mend. 
 One To-day is worth two To-morrows. 
 
262 poor IRicbarD for 1757 
 
 How hard soe er it be to bridle Wit, 
 Yet Mem ry oft no less requires the Bit : 
 How many, hurried by its Force away, 
 " For ever in the Land of Gossips stay ! 
 Usurp the Province of the Nurse, to lull, 
 Without her Privilege for being dull ! 
 Tales upon Tales they raise, ten Stories high, 
 Without Regard to Use or Symmetry. 
 
 The way to be safe, is never to be secure. 
 Dally not with other Folks Women or Money. 
 Work as if you were to live 100 years, Pray as if you 
 were to die To-morrow. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 A Story should, to please, at least seem true, 
 Be apropos, well told, concise, and new ; 
 And whensoe er it deviates from these Rules, 
 The Wise will sleep, and leave Applause to Fools. 
 But others, more intolerable yet, 
 The Waggeries that they ve said, or heard, repeat 
 Heavy by Mem ry made, and what s the worst, 
 At second-hand as often as at first. 
 
 Pride breakfasted with Plenty, dined with Poverty, 
 supped with Infamy. 
 
 Retirement does not always secure Virtue ; Ix>t was 
 upright in the City ; wicked in the Mountain. 
 
 Excess of Wit may oftentimes beguile : 
 
 Jests are not always pardon d by a Smile. 
 
 Men may disguise their Malice at the Heart, 
 
 A4 seem at F,ase tho pain d with inward Smart 
 
poor IRfcbarD for 1757 263 
 
 Mistaken, we think all such Wounds of course 
 
 Reflection cures ; - - alas ! it makes them worse. 
 I,ike Scratches they with double Anguish seize. 
 Rankle with Time, and fester by Degrees. 
 
 But sarcastical Jests on a Man s Person or his Manners, 
 tho hard to bear, are perhaps more easily borne than 
 those that touch his Religion. Men are generally warm 
 in what regards their religious Tenets, either from a 
 Tenderness of Conscience, or a high Sense of their own 
 Judgements. People of plain Parts and honest Disposi 
 tions, look on Salvation as too serious a Thing to be 
 jested with ; and Men of speculative Religion, who 
 profess from the Conviction rather of their Heads than 
 Hearts, are not a bit less vehement than the real Devo 
 tees. He who says a slight or a severe Thing of their 
 Faith, seems to them to have thereby undervalued their 
 Understanding, and will consequently incur their Aver 
 sion, which no Man of common Sense would hazard, for 
 a lively Expression ; much less a person of good Breed 
 ing, who should make it his chief Aim to be well with all. 
 
 I/ike some grave Matron of a noble I/ine, 
 With awful Beauty does Religion shine. 
 Just Sense should teach us to revere the Dame, 
 Nor, by imprudent Jests, to spot her Fame. 
 In common I/ife you 11 own this Reas ning right, 
 That none but Fools in gross Abuse delight : 
 
 Then use it here nor think the Caution vain, 
 
 To be polite, Men need not be profane. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 But above all Things, raillery decline, 
 Nature but few does for that Talk design ; 
 T is in the ablest Hand a dangerous Tool, 
 But never fails to wound the meddling Fool ; 
 
264 poor IRicbarfc for 1757 
 
 For all must grant it needs no common Art 
 To keep Men patient while we make them smart. 
 Not Wit alone, nor Humour s self, will do, 
 Without Good-nature, and much Prudence too. 
 
 Idleness is the Dead Sea, that swallows all Virtues : Be 
 active in Business, that Temptation may miss her Aim ; 
 The Bird that sits, is easily shot. 
 
 Shame and the Dry-belly-ach were Diseases of the last 
 Age, this seems to be cured of them. 
 
 Of all the Qualities that help to raise 
 In Men, the Universal Voice of Praise, 
 Whether in Pleasure or in Use they end, 
 There s none that can with MODESTY contend. 
 Yet t is but little that its Form be caught, 
 Unless its Origin be first in Thought ; 
 Else rebel Nature will reveal the Cheat, 
 And the whole Work of Art at once defeat. 
 
 Tho the Mastiff be gentle, yet bite him not by the ly 
 Great Alms giving, lessen no Man s living. 
 The Royal Crown cures not the Head-ach. 
 
 ON THE FREEDOM OF THE PRESS. 
 
 While free from Force the Press remains, 
 Virtue and Freedom chear our Plains, 
 And ^earning I,argesses bestows, 
 And keeps unlicens d open House. 
 We to the Nation s publick Mart 
 Our Works of Wit, and Schemes of Art, 
 And philosophic Goods, this Way, 
 Ivike Water carriage, cheap convey. 
 This Tree which Knowledge so affords, 
 Inquisitors with flaming Swords 
 
Ipoor IRicbarD tor 1757 265 
 
 From Lay-Approach with Zeal defend, 
 Lest their own Paradise should end. 
 
 The Press from her fecundous Womb 
 Brought forth the Arts of Greece and Rome ; 
 Her offspring, skill d in Logic War, 
 Truth s Banner wav d in open Air ; 
 The Monster Superstition fled, 
 And hid in Shades her Gorgon Head ; 
 And awless Pow r, i.he long kept Field, 
 By Reason quell d, was forc d to yield. 
 
 This Nurse of Arts, and Freedom s Fence, 
 To chain, is Treason against Sense : 
 And L,iberty, thy thousand Tongues 
 None silence who design no Wrongs ; 
 For those who use the Gag s Restraint, 
 First Rob, before they stop Complaint. 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 Hold forth upon yourself on no Pretence, 
 Unless invited, or in Self-Defence ; 
 The Praise you take, altho it be your Due, 
 Will be suspected if it come from you, 
 If to seem modest, you some faults confess, 
 The World suspect yet more, and never less : 
 For each Man, by Experience taught, can tell 
 How strong a Flatterer does within him dwell. 
 
 Act uprightly and despise Calumny ; Dirt may stick to 
 a Mud Wall, but not to polish d Marble. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 No part of Conduct asks for Skill more nice, 
 Tho none more common, than to give Advice : 
 Misers themselves, in this will not be saving, 
 Unless their Knowledge makes it worth the having. 
 
266 poor IRicbarfc for 1757 
 
 And Where s the Wonder, when we will intrude, 
 An useless Gift, it meets Ingratitude ? 
 Shun then, unask d, this arduous Task to try ; 
 But, if consulted, use Sincerity. 
 
 The Borrower is a Slave to the Render ; the Security to 
 both. 
 
 Singularity in the right, hath ruined many : Happy 
 those who are convinced of the general Opinion. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Be rarely warm in Censure or in Praise ; 
 Few Men deserve our Passion either ways : 
 For half the World but floats twixt Good and 111, 
 As Chance disposes Objects, these the Will ; 
 T is but a see-saw Game, where Virtue now 
 Mounts above Vice, and then sinks down as low. 
 Besides, the Wise still hold it for a Rule, 
 To trust that Judgment most, that seems most cool. 
 
 Proportion your Charity to the strength of your Estate, 
 or God will Proportion your Estate to the Weakness of 
 your Charity. 
 
 The Tongue offends, and the Ears get the Cuffing. 
 
 Some antient Philosophers have said, that Happiness 
 depends more on the inward Disposition of Mind than on 
 outward Circumstances ; and that he who cannot be 
 happy in any State, can be so in no State. To be happy, 
 they tell us we must be content. Right. But they do not 
 teach us how we may become content. Poor Richard 
 shall give you a short good Rule for that. To be content 
 look backward on those who possess less than yourself, 
 not forward on those who possess more. If this does not 
 make you content, you don t deserve to be happy. 
 
poor IRtcbarfc for 1757 267 
 
 CONTENTMENT ! Parent of Delight, 
 So much a stranger to our Sight. 
 Say, Goddess, in what happy Place 
 Mortals behold thy blooming Pace ; 
 Thy gracious Auspices impart, 
 And for thy Temple chuse my Heart. 
 They whom thou deignest to inspire, 
 Thy Science learn, to bound Desire ; 
 By happy Alchymy of Mind 
 They turn to Pleasure all they find. 
 Unmov d when the rude Tempest blows, 
 Without an Opiate they repose ; 
 And, cover d by your Shield, defy 
 The whizzing Shafts that round them fly ; 
 Nor, meddling with the Gods Affairs, 
 Concern themselves with distant Cares ; 
 But place their Bliss in mental Rest, 
 And feast upon the Good possest. 
 
 Would you be well receiv d where er you go, 
 Remember each Man vanquish d is a Foe : 
 Resist not therefore to your utmost Might, 
 But let the Weakest think he s sometimes right ; 
 He, for each Triumph you shall thus decline, 
 Shall give ten Opportunities to shine ; 
 He sees, since once you owned him to excel, 
 That t is his Interest you should reason well. 
 
 Sleep without Supping, and you 11 rise without owing 
 for it. 
 
 When other Sins grow old by Time, 
 
 Then Avarice is in its prime, 
 
 Yet feed the Poor at Christmas time. 
 
POOR RICHARD FOR 17^8. 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 COURTEOUS READER, 
 
 I have heard that nothing gives an Author 
 so great Pleasure, as to find his Works respect 
 fully quoted by other learned Authors. This 
 pleasure I have seldom enjoyed, for tho I have 
 been, if I may say it without Vanity, an eminent 
 Author of Almanacks annually now a full quar 
 ter of a Century, my Brother Authors in the 
 same Way, for what Reason I know not, have 
 ever been very sparing in their Applauses ; and 
 no other Author has taken the least notice of 
 me, so that did not my Writings produce me 
 some solid Pudding, the great Deficiency of 
 Praise would have quite discouraged me. 
 
 I concluded at length, that the People were 
 the best Judges of my Merit ; for they buy 
 my Works ; and besides, in my Rambles, 
 where I am not personally known, I have fre 
 quently heard one or other of my Adages *e- 
 
poor IRfcbarfc for 1758 269 
 
 peated, with, as Poor Richard says, at the End 
 on t ; this gave me some Satisfaction, as it 
 showed not only that my Instructions were re 
 garded, but discovered likewise some Respect 
 for my Authority ; and I own that to encourage 
 the practice of remembering and repeating 
 those wise Sentences, I have sometimes quoted 
 myself with great gravity. 
 
 Judge then how much I must have been grati 
 fied by an Incident I am going to relate to you. 
 I stopt my Horse lately where a great Number 
 of people were collected at a Vendue of Mer 
 chant Goods. The Hour of Sale not being 
 come, they were conversing on the Badness of 
 the Times, and one of the Company call d to a 
 plain clean old Man, with white Locks, Pray 
 Father Abraham, what think you of the Times? 
 Won t these heavy Taxes quite ruin the Coun 
 try ? How shall we BK EVER able to pay them ? 
 
 What would you advise us to ? Father 
 
 Abraham stood up, and reply d, If you d have 
 my Advice, I 11 give it you in short, for a 
 Word to the Wise is enough, and many Words 
 won t fill a Bushel, as Poor Richard says, 
 They join d in desiring him to speak his Mind, 
 and gathering round him, he proceeded as fol 
 lows ; 
 
 " Friends, says he, and Neighbours, the Taxes 
 are indeed very heavy, and if those laid on by 
 
270 poor IRtcbarfc for 1758 
 
 the Government were the only Ones we had to 
 pay, we might more easily discharge them ; but 
 we have many others, and much more grievous 
 to some of us. We are taxed twice as much by 
 our Idleness, three times as much by our Pride , 
 and four times as much by our Folly, and from 
 these Taxes the Commissioners cannot ease or 
 deliver us by allowing an Abatement. How 
 ever let us hearken to good Advice, and some 
 thing may be done for us ; God helps them that 
 help themselves, as Poor Richard says in his 
 Almanac of 1733. 
 
 It would be thought a hard Government that 
 should tax its People one tenth Part of their 
 Time, to be employed in its Service. But Idle 
 ness taxes many of us much more, if we reckon 
 all that is spent in absolute Sloth, or doing of 
 nothing, with that which is spent in idle Em 
 ployments or Amusements, that amount to 
 nothing. Sloth, by bringing on Diseases abso 
 lutely shortens L,ife. Sloth, like Rust, con 
 sumes faster than Labour wears, luhile the used 
 Key is always bright, as Poor Richard says. 
 But dost Ihou love Life, then do not squander 
 Time, for that >s the Stuff Life is made of, as 
 Poor Richard says. How much more than is 
 necessary do we spend in Sleep ! forgetting that 
 The Sleeping Fox catches no Poultry, and that 
 there will be sleeping enough in the Grave, as 
 
poor IRfcbarfc for 173S 271 
 
 Poor Richard says. If Time be of all Things 
 the most precious, wasting of Time must be, 
 as Poor Richard says, the greatest Prodigality, 
 since, as he elsewhere tells us, Lost Time is 
 never found again ; and what we call Time- 
 enough, always proves little enough. lyet us 
 then be up and doing, and doing to the Purpose ; 
 so by Diligence shall we do more with less Per 
 plexity. Sloth makes all things difficult, but 
 Industry all Things easy, as Poor Richard says ; 
 and He that riseth late, must trot all Day, and 
 shall scarce overtake his Business at night. 
 While Laziness travels so slowly, that Poverty 
 soon overtakes him, as we read in Poor Rich 
 ard, who adds, Drive thy Business, let not that 
 drive thee ; and Early to Bed, and early to rise, 
 makes a Man healthy, wealthy, and wise. 
 
 So what signifies wishing and hoping for bet 
 ter times. We may make these Times better 
 if we bestir ourselves. Industry need not wish 
 as Poor Richard says, and He that lives upon 
 Hope will die fasting. There are no Gains, 
 without Pains ; then Help Hands, for I have 
 no Lands, or if I have, they are smartly taxed. 
 And as Poor Richard likewise observes, He that 
 hath a Trade hath an Estate, and He that hath 
 a Calling hath an Office of Profit and Honour ; 
 but then the Trade must be worked at, and the 
 Calling well followed, or neither the Estate, nor 
 
272 poor IRfcbarfc for 1758 
 
 the Office, will enable us to pay our Taxes. If 
 we are industrious we shall never starve ; for as 
 Poor Richard says, At the working Man s 
 House Hunger looks in, but dares not enter. 
 Nor will the Bailiff or the Constable enter, for 
 Industry pays Debts while Despair encreaseth 
 
 them, says Poor Richard. What though you 
 
 have found no Treasure, nor has any rich Rela 
 tion left you a I/egacy, Diligence is the Mother 
 of Good-luck, as Poor Richard says, and God 
 gives all things to Industry. Then plough deep, 
 while Sluggards sleep, and you shall have Corn 
 to sell and to keep, says Poor Dick. Work 
 while it it is called To-day, for you know not 
 how much you may be hindered To-morrow, 
 which makes Poor Richard say, One To-day is 
 worth two To-morrows ; and farther, Have you 
 somewhat to do To-morrow, do it to To-day. If 
 you were a Servant would you not be ashamed 
 that a good Master should catch you idle ? Are 
 you then your own Master, be ashamed to catch 
 yourself idle, as Poor Dick says. When there 
 is so much to be done for yourself, your Family, 
 your Country, and your gracious King, be up 
 by Peep of Day ; Let not the Sun look down 
 and say, Inglorious here he lies. Handle your 
 Tools without Mittens ; remember that the Cat 
 in Gloves catches no Mice, as Poor Richard says. 
 T is true there is much to be done, and perhaps 
 
poor Ifltcbarfc for 1758 273 
 
 you are weak-handed, but stick to it steadily, 
 and you will see great Effects, for constant 
 Dropping wears away Stones, and by Diligence 
 and Patience, the Mouse ate in two the Cable ; 
 and little Strokes fell great Oaks, as Poor Rich 
 ard says in his Almanack, the Year I cannot 
 just now remember. 
 
 Methinks I hear some of you say, Must a 
 Man afford himself no Leisure ? I will tell 
 thee My Friend, what Poor Richard says, Em 
 ploy thy Time well if thou meanest to gain 
 Leisure ; and, since thou art not sure of a Min 
 ute, throw not away an Hour. Leisure is Time 
 for doing something useful ; this Leisure the 
 diligent man will obtain, but the lazy man 
 never ; so that, as Poor Richard says, a Life of 
 Leisure and a Life of Laziness are two Things. 
 Do you imagine that Sloth will afford you more 
 Comfort than Labour ? No, for as Poor Rich 
 ard says, Trouble springs from Idleness, and 
 grievous Toil from needless Ease. Many with 
 out Labour, would live by their WITS only, but 
 they break for want of stock. Whereas Indus 
 try gives Comfort, and Plenty and Respect : 
 Fly Pleasures and they II follow you. The dili 
 gent Spinner has a large Shift ; and now I have 
 a Sheep and a Cow, every Body bids me Good 
 morrow, all which is well said by Poor Richard. 
 
 But with our Industry, we must likewise be 
 18 ~. 
 
274 poor IRfcbarfc for 1758 
 
 steady, settled, and careful, and oversee our own 
 Affairs with our own Eyes, and not trust too 
 much to others ; for, as Poor Richard says, 
 
 / never saw an oft removed Tree, 
 
 Nor yet an oft removed Family, 
 
 That throve so well as those that settled be. 
 
 And again, Three Removes is as bad as a Fire i 
 and again, Keep thy Shop, and thy Shop will 
 keep thee ; and again, If you would have yom 
 Business done, go ; if not, send. And again, 
 
 He that by the Plough must thrive, 
 Himself must either hold or drive. 
 
 And again, The Eye of a Master will do more 
 Work than both his Hands ; and again, Want 
 of Care does us more Damage than Want of 
 Knowledge ; and again, Not to oversee Work 
 men, is to leave them your Purse open. Trust 
 ing too much to others Care is the Ruin of 
 many ; for, as the Almanack says, In the Af 
 fairs of this World, Men are saved, not by 
 Faith, but by the Want ofit; but a Man s own 
 Care is profitable ; for, saith Poor Dick, Learn 
 ing is to the Studious, and Riches to the Care 
 ful, as well as Power to the Bold, and Heaven 
 to the Virtuous. And, farther, If you would 
 have a faithful Servant, and one that you like, 
 ^erve yourself . And again, he adviseth to Cir 
 
fcoor IRfcbarfc for 1758 275 
 
 cutnspectioii and Care, even in the smallest 
 Matters, because sometimes a little Neglect 
 may breed great Mischief, adding, for ivant of 
 a Nail, the Shoe was lost ; for want of a Shoe 
 the Horse was lost ; and for want of a Horse 
 the Rider was lost, being overtaken and slain 
 by the Enemy, all for want of Care about a 
 Horse-shoe Nail. 
 
 So much for Industry, my Friends, and Atten 
 tion to one s own Business ; but to these we 
 must add Frugality, if we would make our In 
 dustry more certainly successful. A man may, 
 if he knows not how to save as he gets, Keep 
 his Nose all his Life to the Grindstone, and die 
 not worth a Groat at last. A fat Kitchen 
 makes a lean Will, as Poor Richard says ; and 
 
 Many Estates are spent in the Getting, 
 
 Since Women for Tea forsook Spinning and Kniting, 
 
 And Men for Punch forsook Hewing and Splitting. 
 
 If you would be wealthy, says he, in another Al 
 manack, think of Saving, as well as of Getting : 
 The Indies have not made Spain rich, because 
 her Outgoes are greater than her Incomes. 
 Away then with your expensive Follies, you 
 will not have so much cause to complain of 
 hard Times, heavy Taxes, and chargeable 
 Families ; for as Poor Dick says, 
 
276 poor Tflfcbarfc for 1758 
 
 Women and Wine, Game and Deceit, 
 
 Make the Wealth small and the Wants great. 
 
 And farther, What maintains one Vice would 
 bring up two Children. You may think per 
 haps that a little Tea or a little Punch now and 
 then, Diet a little more costly, Clothes a little 
 finer, and a little Entertainment now and then, 
 can be no great Matter ; but remember what 
 Poor Richard says, Many a Little makes a 
 Mickle ; and farther, Beware of little Ex- 
 pences ; a small Leak will sink a great Ship ; 
 and again, Who Dainties love shall Beggars 
 prove ; and moreover, Fools make Feasts and 
 wise Men eat them. 
 
 Here you are all got together at this Vendue 
 of Fineries and Knicknacks. You call them 
 Goods, but if you do not take Care, they will 
 prove Evils to some of you. You expect they 
 will be sold cheap, and perhaps they may for 
 less than they cost ; but if you have no Occasion 
 for them, they must be dear to you. Remember 
 what Poor Richard says, Buy what thou hast 
 no Need of, and ere long thou shalt sell thy 
 Necessaries. And again, At a great Penny 
 worth pause a while : He means, that perhaps 
 the Cheapness is apparent only, and not real ; or 
 the Bargain, by straitning thee in thy Business, 
 may do thee more Harm than Good. For in 
 another Place he says, Many have been ruined 
 
poor IRicbarfc tor 1758 277 
 
 by buying good Pennyworths. Again Poor 
 , Richard says, T is foolish to lay out Hfoney in 
 a Purchase of Repentance ; and yet this Folly 
 is practised every Day at Vendues, for want 
 of minding the Almanack. Wise Men, as Poor 
 Dick says, learn by others Harms, Fools scarcely 
 by their own ; but Felix quern faciunt aliena 
 Pcricula cautum. Many a one, for the Sake 
 of Finery on the Back, have gone with a hun 
 gry Belly, and half starved their Families; 
 Silks and Sattins, Scarlet and Velvets, as Poor 
 Richard says, put out the Kitchen Fire. 
 These are not the Necessaries of Life ; they 
 can scarcely be called the Conveniences, and 
 yet only because they look pretty how many 
 want to have them. The artificial Wants of 
 Mankind thus become more numerous than the 
 natural; and as Poor Dick says, For one poor 
 Person there are an hundred indigent. By 
 these, and other Extravagancies, the Genteel 
 are reduced to Poverty, and forced to borrow 
 of those whom they formerly despised, but who 
 through Industry and Frugality have main 
 tained their Standing ; in which case it appears 
 plainly, that a Ploughman on his Legs is higher 
 than a Gentleman on his Knees, as Poor Rich 
 ard says. Perhaps they have had a small Bs- 
 tate left them, which they knew not the Getting 
 of, they think / is Day and will never be 
 
278 poor IRicbaro for 1758 
 
 Night ; that a little to be spent out of so much, 
 is iiot worth minding ; (a Child and a Fool, as , 
 Poor Richard says, imagine Twenty Shillings 
 and Twenty Years can never be spent] but, 
 always taking out of the Meat-tub, and never 
 putting in, soon conies to the Bottom ; then, as 
 Poor Dick says, When the Well s dry, they 
 know the Worth of Water. But this they might 
 have known before, if they had taken his Ad 
 vice ; If you would know th"e Value of Money, 
 go and try to borrow some ; for he that goes a 
 borrowing goes a sorrowing ; and indeed so 
 does he that lends to such People, when he goes 
 to get it in again. Poor Dick farther advises, 
 and says, 
 
 Fond Pride of Dress, is sure a very Curse ; 
 E er Fancy you consult, consult your Purse. 
 
 And again, Pride is as loud a Beggar as Want, 
 and a great deal more saucy. When you have 
 bought one fine Thing you must buy ten more, 
 that your appearance may be all of a Piece ; but 
 Poor Dick says, * Tis easier to suppress the first 
 Desire, than to satisfy all that follow it. And 
 t is as truly Folly for the Poor to ape the Rich, 
 as for the Frog to swell, in order to equal 
 the Ox. 
 
 Great Estates may venture more, 
 
 But little Boats should keep near Shore. 
 
fcoor IRicbarfc for 1758 279 
 
 T is however a Folly soon punished ; for Pride 
 that dines on Vanity sups on Contempt, as Poor 
 Richard says. And in another Place, Pride 
 breakfasted with Plenty, dined with Poverty, 
 and supped with Infamy. And after all, of 
 what Use is this Pride of Appearance, for which 
 so much is risked, so much is suffered ! It can 
 not promote Health, or ease Pain ; it makes no 
 Increase of Merit in the Person, creates Envy, 
 it hastens Misfortune. 
 
 What is a Butterfly f At best 
 He s but a Caterpillar drest. 
 The gaudy Fop s his Picture just. 
 
 as Poor Richard says. 
 
 But what Madness must it be to run in Debt 
 for these Superfluities ! We are offered by the 
 Terms of this Vendue, Six Months Credit ; 
 and that perhaps has induced some of us to 
 attend it, because we cannot spare the ready 
 Money, and hope now to be fine without it. 
 But, ah, think what you do when you run in 
 Debt ; You give to another Power over your 
 Liberty. If you cannot pay at the Time, you 
 will be ashamed to see your Creditor ; you will 
 be in Fear when you speak to him ; you will 
 make poor pitiful sneaking Excuses, and by 
 Degrees come to lose your Veracity, and sink 
 into base downright lying ; for as Poor Richard 
 
280 poor IRtcbarD for 1758 
 
 says, The second Vice is Lying, the first is ran* 
 ning in Debt. And again, to the same Purpose, 
 Lying rides upon Debt s Back. Whereas a 
 freeborn Englishman ought not to be ashamed 
 or afraid to see or speak to any Man living. 
 But Poverty often deprives a Man of all Spirit 
 and Virtue ; T is hard for an empty Bag to 
 stand upright, as Poor Richard truly says. 
 What would you think of that Prince, or that 
 Government, who should issue an Edict forbid 
 ding you to dress like a Gentleman, or a Gentle 
 woman, on Pain of Imprisonment or Servitude \ 
 Would you not say, that you are free, have a 
 Right to dress as you please, and that such an 
 Kdict would be a Breach of your Privileges, 
 and such a Government tyrannical ! And yet 
 you are about to put yourself under that Tyr- 
 rany when you run in Debt for such Dress ! 
 Your Creditor has Authority at his Pleasure to 
 deprive you of your Liberty, by confining you 
 in Goal for Life, or to sell you for a Servant, if 
 you should not be able to pay him ! When 
 you have got your Bargain, you may, perhaps, 
 think little of Payment ! but Creditors, Poor 
 Richard, tells us, have better Memories than 
 Debtors ; and in another Place says, Creditors 
 are a superstitious Sect, great Observers of set 
 Days and Times. The Day comes round be 
 fore you are aware, and the Demand is made 
 
fcoor IRicbarfc tor 1758 281 
 
 before you are prepared to satisfy it, Or if you 
 bear your Debt in Mind, the Term which at 
 first seemed so long, will, as it lessens, appear 
 extreamly short. Time will seem to have 
 added Wings to his Heels as well as Shoulders. 
 Those have a short Lent, saith Poor Richard, 
 who owe Money to be paid at Easter. Then, 
 since as he says, The Borrower is a Slave to the 
 Lender, and the Debtor is the Creditor, dis 
 dain the Chain, preserve your Freedom ; and 
 maintain your Independency ; Be industrious 
 and free; be frugal and free. At present, per 
 haps, you may think yourself in thriving Cir 
 cumstances, and that you can bear a little 
 Extravagance without Injury; but, 
 
 For Age and Want save while you may ; 
 No Morning Sun lasts a whole Day, 
 
 as Poor Richard says. Gain may be tempo 
 rary and uncertain, but ever while you live 
 Experience is constant and certain; and /? 
 easier to build two- Chimnies than to keep one 
 in Fuel, as Poor Richard says. So rather go to 
 Bed supperless than rise in Debt. 
 
 Get what you can, and what you get hold. 
 
 Tit the stone that will turn all your Lead into Gold, 
 
 as Poor Richard says. And when you have 
 got the Philosopher s Stone, sure you will no 
 
282 poor IRfcbarD for 1758 
 
 longer complain of the bad Times, or the Diffi 
 culty of paying Taxes. 
 
 This Doctrine, my Friends, is Reason and 
 Wisdom; but after all, do not depend too 
 much on your own Industry, and Frugality, 
 and Prudence, though excellent Things ; for 
 they may all be blasted without the Blessing of 
 Heaven ; and therefore ask that Blessing hum 
 bly, and be not uncharitable to those that at 
 present seem to want it, but comfort and help 
 them. Remember Job suffered and was after 
 wards prosperous. 
 
 And now to conclude, Experience keeps a 
 dear School, but Fools will learn in no other, 
 and scarce in that; for it is true, we may give 
 Advice, but we cannot give Conduct, as Poof 
 Richard says : However, remember this, They 
 that won t be counselled, can t be helped, as 
 Poor Richard says : and farther, That if you will 
 not hear Reason, she // surely wrap your 
 Knuckles. 
 
 Thus the old Gentleman ended his Harangue,, 
 The People heard it, and approved the Doctrine, 
 and immediately practised the contrary, just as 
 if it had been a common Sermon ; for the Ven- 
 due opened, and they began to buy extrava 
 gantly, notwithstanding all his Cautions, and 
 their own Fear of Taxes. I found the good 
 Man had thoroughly studied my Almanacks 
 
poor IRicbarD for 1758 283 
 
 and digested all I had dropt on those Topicks 
 during the Course of Five-and-Twenty Years. 
 The frequent mention he made of me must have 
 tired any one else, but my Vanity was wonder 
 fully delighted with it, though I was conscious 
 that not a tenth Part of this Wisdom was my 
 own which he ascribed to me, but rather the 
 Gleanings I had made of the Sense of all Ages 
 and Nations. However, I resolved to be the 
 better for the Bcho of it ; and though I had at 
 first determined to buy Stuff for a new Coat, I 
 went away resolved to wear my old one a little 
 longer. Reader, if thou wilt do the same, thy 
 Profit will be as great as mine. 
 / am, as ever, 
 
 Thine to serve thee, 
 RICHARD SAUNDBRS. 
 July 7, 1757. 
 
 JANUARY. 
 
 On Ambition. 
 
 I know, young Friend, Ambition fills your Mind 
 And in life s Voyage is th impelling Wind ; 
 But at the Helm let sober Reason stand 
 And steer the Bark with Heav n-directed Hand : 
 So shall you safe Ambitions Gale receive, 
 And ride securely, tho the Billows heave ; 
 So shall you shun the giddy Hero s Fate, 
 And by her Influence be both good and great. 
 
 One Nestor is worth two Ajaxes. 
 When you re an Anvil, hold you still ; 
 When you re a Hammer, strike your fill. 
 
284 poor IRicbarfc for 1758 
 
 FEBRUARY. 
 
 She bids you first, in Life s soft Vernal Hours, 
 With active Industry wake Natures Powers ; 
 With rising Years, still rising Arts display, 
 With new-born Graces mark each new-born Day, 
 T is now the Time young Passion to command 
 While yet the pliant Stem obeys the Hand ; 
 Guide now the Courser with a steady rein 
 IJ er yet he bounds o er Pleasures flow ry Plane ; 
 In Passion s Strife, no Medium you can have ; 
 You rule a Master, or submit a Slave. 
 
 When Knaves betray each other, one can scarce be 
 blamed or the other pitied. 
 
 He that carries a small Crime easily, will carry it on 
 when it comes to be an Ox. 
 
 For whom these Toils, you may perhaps enquire ; 
 First for yourself, next Nature will inspire, 
 The filial Thought, fond Wish, and Kindred Tear 
 Which makes the Parent and the Sister dear : 
 To these, in closest Bands of I v ove, ally d, 
 Their Joy and Grief you live, their Shame or Pride 
 Hence timely learn to make their Bliss your own, 
 And scorn to think or act for Self alone. 
 
 Happy Tom Crump ne er sees his own Hump. 
 Fools need Advice most, but wise Men only are th 
 better for it. 
 
 Hence bravely strive upon your own to raise 
 Their Honour, Grandeur, Dignity and Praise. 
 
 But wider far, beyond the narrow Bound 
 Of Family, Ambition searches round : 
 
poor IRicbarfc for 1758 285 
 
 Searches to find the Friend s delightful Face, 
 The Friend at last demands the second place, 
 And yet beware ; for most desire a Friend 
 From meaner Motives, not for Virtue s F^d. 
 There are, who with fond Favour s fickle Gale 
 Now sudden swell, and now contract their Sail. 
 
 Silence is not always a Sign of Wisdom, but Babbling 
 is ever a Folly. 
 
 Great Modesty often hides great Merit. 
 You may delay, but Time will not. 
 
 This Week devour, the next with sickening Eye 
 Avoid, and cast the sully d Plaything by ; 
 There are, who tossing in the Bed of Vice, 
 For Flattery s Opiate give the highest Price ; 
 Yet from the saving Hand of Friendship turn, 
 Her Medicines dread, her generous Offers spurn. 
 Deserted Greatness ! who but pities thee ? 
 By crowds encompass d, thou no friend canst see : 
 
 Virtue may always make a Face handsome, but Vice 
 will certain make it ugly. 
 
 Prodigality of Time produces Poverty of Miiid as well 
 as of Estate. 
 
 JUNE. 
 
 Or should kind Truth invade thy gentle Ear, 
 We pity still ; for thou no Truth canst hear. 
 Ne er grudg d thy Wealth to swell an useless State, 
 Yet, frugal, deems th Expence of Friends too great ; 
 For Friends ne er mixing in ambitions Strife, 
 For Friends, the richest Furniture of I^ife ! 
 
 Be yours, my son, a nobler, higher Aim 
 Your Pride to burn with Friendship s sacred Flame ; 
 
286 poor IRtcbarfc for 1758 
 
 Content is the Philosopher s Stone, that turns all it 
 touches into Gold. 
 He that s content hath enough. 
 He that complains has too much. 
 Pride gets into the Coach, and Shame mounts behind. 
 
 JULY. 
 
 By Virtue kindled, by like Manners fed, 
 By mutual Wishes, mutual Favours spread, 
 Increas d with Years, by candid Truth refin d 
 Pour all its boundless Ardours thro your mind 
 By yours the care a chosen Band to gain ; 
 With them to Glory s radiant Summit strain, 
 Aiding and aided each, while all contend 
 Who best, who bravest, shall assist his Friend. 
 
 The first Mistake in public Business, is the going into it. 
 Half the Truth is often a great l,ie. 
 The Way to see by Faith is to shut the Eye of Reason 
 The Morning Daylight appears plainer when you put 
 out your Candle. 
 
 AUGUST. 
 
 Thus still should private Friendships spread around, 
 Till in their joint Embrace the Publick s found, 
 The common Friend ! Then all her Good explore ; 
 Kxplor d, pursue with each unbiass d Power 
 But chief the greatest should her J^aws revere, 
 Ennobling Honours, which she bids them wear 
 Ambition fills with Charity the Mind, 
 And pants to be the Friend of all Mankind. 
 
 A full Belly makes a dull Brain. 
 
 The Muses starve in a Cook s Shop. 
 
 Spare and have is better than spend and crave. 
 
 Good-Will, like the Wind, floweth where it listeth. 
 
fcoor IRfcbarO for 175S 287 
 
 SEPTEMBER. 
 
 Her Country all beneath one ambient Sky 
 Whosoe er beholds yon radiant Orb on high, 
 To -whom one Sun impartial gives the Day, 
 To whom the Silver Moon her milder Ray, 
 Whom the same Water, Earth, and Air sustain, 
 O er whom one Parent-King extends his Reign 
 Are her compatriots all, by her belov d, 
 In Nature near, tho far by Space remov d ; 
 On common Earth, no Foreigner she knows ; 
 No Foe can find, or none but Virtue s Foes : 
 
 The Honey is sweet, but the Bee has a Sting. 
 In a corrupt Age, the putting the World in order would 
 breed Confusion ; then e en mind your own Business. 
 
 OCTOBER. 
 
 Ready she stands her cheerful Aid to lend ; 
 
 To Want and Woe an undemanded Friend. 
 
 Nor thus advances others Bliss alone ; 
 
 But in the Way to theirs, still finds her own. 
 
 Their s is her own. What, should your Taper light 
 
 Ten Thousand, burns it to yourself less bright ? 
 
 " Men are ungrateful." Be they so that dare ! 
 
 Is that the Giver s or Receiver s Care ? 
 
 To serve the Publick faithfully, and at the same time 
 please it entirely is impracticable. 
 
 Proud Modern ^earning despises the antient : School 
 men are now laught at by school-boys. 
 
 NOVEMBER. 
 
 Oh ! blind to Joys, that from .rue Bounty flow ; 
 To think those e er repent whose Hearts bestow ! 
 Man to his Maker thus best Homage pays, 
 Thus peaceful walks thro Virtues pleasing Ways 
 
288 floor IRicbarb for 1758 
 
 Her gentle Image on the Soul imprest, 
 Bids each tempestuous Passion leave the Brea* 
 Hence with her livid Self-devouring Snakes 
 Pale Envy flies ; her quiver Slander breaks : 
 Thus falls (dire Scourge of a distracted Age ! ) 
 The Knave-led, one ey d Monster, Party Rage. 
 
 Men often mistake themselves, seldom forget them 
 selves. 
 
 The idle Man is the Devil s Hireling, whose Livery is 
 Rags, whose Diet and Wages are Famine and Diseases. 
 
 DECEMBER. 
 
 Ambition jostles with her Friends no more ; 
 Nor thirsts Revenge to drink a Brothers Gore ; 
 Fiery Remorse no stinging Scorpions rears : 
 O er trembling Guilt no falling Sword appears. 
 Hence Conscience, void of Blame, her Front erects, 
 Hence just Ambition boundless Splendors crown 
 And hence she calls Eternity her own. 
 
 Rob not God, nor the Poor, lest thou ruin thyself; 
 The Eagle snatcht a Coal from the Altar, but it firec 
 her Nest. 
 
 With bounteous cheer 
 
 Conclude the Year. 
 
 FINIS. 
 
 
 

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