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THE
OLD JUDGE;
OR,
LIFE IN A COLONY.
BY THE Al'THOE OF
"SAM SLICK, THE CLOCKMAKER,"
" THE ATTACHE," &C.
Habeoque senectiiti magnam gratiam, quae mihi sermonis aviditatem auxit,
potionis et cibi sustulit. Cicebo de Senectute.
IN TWO VOLUMES.
VOL. I.
LONDON:
HENRY COLBURN, PUBLISHER,
GREAT MARLBOROUGH STREET.
1849.
p. Shoberl, Jun., Priuter to H R.H . Prince Albert, 51, Rupert St., Haymarket.
* * •
• • * - * * •
a
V
Q
c
CO
CO
C7)
■a:
PEBFACE.
The following sketches of" Life in a Colony"
were drawn from natm^e, after a residence of
half a century among the people, whose habits,
manners, and social condition, they are intended
to delineate. I have adopted the form of a
tour, and the chamcter of a stranger, for the
-2 double pui*pose of avoiding the prolixity of a
p journal, by the omission of tedious details, and
i^ the egotism of an author, by making othei's
speak for themselves in their own way. The
utmost care has been taken to exclude any
thing that could by any possibility be sup-
posed to have a personal reference, or be tlie
subject of annoyance. The " dramatis per-
sonae" of this work are, therefore, ideal repre-
sentatives of their several classes, having all
IV PREFACE.
the characteristics and peculiarities of their own
set, but no actual existence. Should they be
found to resemble particular individuals, I can
assui'e the reader tliat it is accidental, and not
intentional ; and I tnist it will be considered,
as it really is, tlie unavoidable result of an
attempt to delineate the featui'es of a people
among whom tliere is such a strong ftimily
likeness.
In my previous works, I have been fortunate
enough to have avoided censure on this score,
and I have been most anxious to render the
present book as unobjectionable as its pre-
decessors. Political sketches I have abstained
from altogether; provincial and local affairs
are too insignificant to interest the general
reader, and tlie policy of the Colonial Office is
foreign to my subject. The absiu'd import-
ance attached in tliis country to ti'ifles, the
gi-andiloquent language of rural politicians,
tlie flimsy veil of patriotism, mider which
selfishness sti'ives to hide the deformity of its
visage, and the attempt to adopt the machinery
PREFACE. V
of a large empire to the government of a
small colony, present many objects for ridicule
or satire; but tliey could not be approached
without the suspicion of personality, and the
direct imputation of prejudice. As I con-
sider, however, that the work would be incom-
plete without giving some idea of the form of
government under which the inhabitants of
the lower colonies live, I have prepared a very
brief outline of it, without any comment.
Those persons who take no interest in such
matters, can pass it over, and leave it for
others who may prefer information to amuse-
ment.
I have also avoided, as far as practicable,
topics common to other countries, and endea-
voured to select scenes and characters pecu-
liar to the colony, and not to be foimd in books.
Some similarity there must necessarily be be-
tween all branches of the Anglo-Saxon family,
speaking the same language, and living under
modifications of the same form of government ;
but still, there are shades of difference which,
A3
VI PREFACE.
tliougli not strongly reniarked, are plainly dis-
cernible to a practised eye.
Facics non omnibus una nee tamen div
ersa.
Tliis distinctive cliaracter is produced by the
necessities and condition of a new country, by
the natui-e of the climate, the want of an Esta-
blished ChiuTh, hereditary rank, entailment of
estates, and the subdivision of labour, on the
one hand, and the absence of nationality, inde-
pendence, and Republican institutions, on the
otliei'.
Colonists differ again in like manner from
each other, according to the situation of their
respective country ; some bemg merely agri-
cultural, others commercial, and many par-
tiiking of the character of both. A i)icture of
any one North American Province, therefore,
will not, in all respects, be a true representa-
tion of another. The Nova Scotian, who is
more particularly tlie subject of this work, is
often found superintending the cultivation of
a farm, and building a vessel at the same time ;
PREFACE. Vll
and is not only able to catch and cure a cargo
of fish, but to find his way with it to the West
Indies or the Mediterranean ; he is a man of
all work, but expert in none — knows a little
of many things, but nothing well. He is ir-
regular m his pursuits, " all thmgs by tm'ns,
and nothing long," and vam of his ability or
information, but is a hardy, frank, good-
natured, hospitable, manly fellow, and Avithal
quite as good-looking as his air gives you to
understand he thmks himself to be. Such is
the gentleman known throughout America as
Mr. Blue Nose, a sobriquet acquired from a
superior potato of that name, of the good
qualities of which he is never tired of talking,
being anxious, like most men of small property,
to exhibit to the best advantage the little he
had.
Altliough this term is applicable to all
natives, it is more particularly so to that por-
tion of the population descended from emi-
grants from the New England States, either pre-
viously to, or immediately after, the American
viii PREFACE.
Revolution. The accent of the Blue Nose is
provincial, inclinuig more to Yankee than to
English, his utterance rapid, and his conversa-
tion liherally garnished with Ameiican phraseo-
logy, and much enlivened ^vith dry humour.
From the diversity of trades of which he knows
something, and the variety of occupations in
which he has been at one time or another
engaged, he uses indiscriminately the technical
terms of all, in a manner that would often
puzzle a stranger to pronounce whether he was
a landsman or sailor, a farmer, mechanic, lum-
berer, or fisherman. These characteristics are
more or less common to the people of New
Brunswick, Prince Edward Island, and Cape
Breton, and the scene of these sketches might
perhaps to a very great extent be laid, with
equal propriety, in those places as in Nova
Scotia. But to Upper and Lower Canada they
are not so applicable.
Tlie town of Illinoo, so often mentioned in
this work, is a fictitious ])lace. I have selected
it in preference to a real one, to prevent the
PREFACE. IX
possible application of my remarks to any of
the inhabitants, in accordance with the earnest
desire I have already expressed to avoid giving
offence to any one. Some of these sketches
have already appeared in " Fraser's Magazine"
for the year 1847. These have been revised,
and their order somewhat transposed, so as to
make them blend harmoniously with the ad-
ditional numbers contained in these volimies.
Having made tliese explanations, I now submit
the work to the public.
CONTENTS
OP
THE FIRST VOLUME.
PAGE
Chapter I. The Old Judge . ... 1
Chapter II. How many Fins has a Cod ? or, Forty
Years Ago . . • . .14
Chapter III. Asking a Grovernor to Dine . . 47
Chapter IV. The Tombstones . . .100
Chapter V. A Ball at Government House . .120
Chapter Yl. The Old Admiral and the Old General . 162
Chapter VII. The Fu-st Settlers . . .196
Chapter VIH. Merrimakings . . . 205
Chapter IX. The Schoolmaster ; or, the Hecke Thaler 230
Chapter X. The Lone House . . • 2.54
Chapter XI. The Keeping-room of an Inn ; or. Judge
Beler's Ghost. No. L . . . 281
NOTICE.
The copyright of this Work being the exclusive property of Mr.
Colburri, any person attempting to infringe his right will be im-
mediately prosecuted.
The Publisher also begs to state that, by the late Copyright Act,
the 5 and 6 Victoria, c. 45, itis enacted, that any person having in his
possession, within the United Kingdom, for sale or hire, one or more
copies printed abroad of any English work protected by the Act
referred to, is liable to a penalty, which, incases affecting his interest,
he intends to enforce.
The public are further informed, that the Act 5 and 6 Victoria,
c. 47, s. 24, prohibits the importation of all works printed in foreign
countries, of which the copyright has not expired. Even single copies,
though for the especial use of the importers, and marked with their
names, are excluded ; and the Customs' officers in the different ports
are strictly enjoined to carry this regulation into effect.
N.B. — The above regulations are in force in all British colonies
and dependencies, as well as in the United Kingdom.
THE OLD JUDGE;
OE,
LIFE IN A COLONY.
CHAPTER I.
THE OLD JUDGE.
A few days ago two strangers were shown into my
study : one of them, stepping aside, pointed to his
companion, and said, " This, sir, is the Reverend
Gabriel Gab of Olympus." The other performed the
same kind office for his friend, saying, " And this, sir,
is the Reverend Elijah Warner, of the Millerite per-
suasion, from Palmyra, United States of America."
The former, whose name was by no means inappro-
priate, explained, with great volubility, the object of
their visit, which he said was twofold : first, to pay
their respects to me ; secondly, to make some inquiries
about the great bore in the river in my neighbourhood.
Had there been a mirror in the room, I should have
been tempted to have pointed to it, as they would
have there seen two much greater bores in their own
persons ; for, if there is any one subject more than
VOL. I. B
2 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
anotlicr, of whioli I am lieartily tired, it is the extra-
ordinary tide of this roinarkablo river. It attracts
many idlers to the villaire, wlio pester every one they
meet witli questions and theories, and seldom talk of
anything else. If, however, the visit of these orentle-
men wearied me, in consequence of the threadbare
subject of our discourse, it amused me not a little by
the whimsical manner of its introduction ; it not only
had novelty to recommend it, but its brevity enabled
tliom to enter in medias res at once. I sliall there-
fore imitate their example, by introducing myself and
explaining my business.
I am, gentle reader, a traveller, and my object also
is twofold : first, to pay my respects to you, and,
secondly, to impart, rather than solicit, information.
When I left England, my original destination was
New York and the far West, after which I purposed
making a rapid tour over our North American Colo-
nies. In pursuance of this plan, I took passage on
board of one of the British mail-steamers for America.
It is well known that these ships touch at Halifax
on their way to and from New York and Boston ;
this apparently circuitous route being actually thirty-
six miles shorter than the direct course,' In twelve
days after leaving England I found myself in Halifax.
Of my voyage out I shall say nothing. He must
' See the second series of The Clockmaker, chapter xxii., in
•which this route was first suggested, and the actual distance
given.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 3
be a bold man indeed who would attempt to describe
the incidents of a common passage across the Atlantic,
with any hope whatever of finding a reader. It was,
like all similar trips, though as comfortable as such an
affair can be, anything but agreeable, and, though
short, tedious to a landsman. Off the Port of Halifax
we encountered a thick foo;, and were oblioed to
slacken our speed and use the lead constantly, when
we suddenly emerged from it into bright clear daz-
zling sunshine. Before us lay the harbour, as calm, as
white, and as glittering, as if covered with glass ; a
comparison that suggested itself by the beautiful re-
flections it presented of the various objects on shore ;
while behind us was the dense black mass of fog,
reaching fi'om the water to the heavens, like a wall or
cloud of darkness. It seemed as if Day and Night
were reposing together side by side.
The first object that met our view was the pic-
turesque little church that crowns the clifi" overlooking
the village and haven of Falkland, and, like a stella
maris^ guides the poor fisherman from afar to his home,
and recalls his wanderino- thouo;hts to that other and
happier one that awaits him when the storms and
tempests of this life shall have passed away for ever.
The entrance to this noble harbour, the best, perhaps,
in America, is exceedingly beautiful ; such portions
of the landscape as are denuded of trees exhibit a
very high state of cultivation; while the natural sterility
of the cold, wet, and rocky soil of the background is
b2
•i THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
clothed and concealed by verdant evergreens of spruce
fir, pine, and hendock. On either hand, you pass
formidable fortifications, and the national flag and the
]3ritish sentinel bear testimony to the power and
extensive possessions of dear old England.
On the right is the rapidly increasing town of Dart-
mouth ; on the left, Halifax, situated in extenso on the
slope of a long high hill, the cone-like summit of which
is converted into a citadel. The effect from the water
is very imposing, giving the idea of a much larger and
better built place than it is — an illusion productive of
much subsequent disappointment. Still further on,
and forming the northern termination of the city, is
the Government Dockyard, of which I shall speak
elsewhere. Here the harbour contracts to a very nar-
row space, and then suddenly enlarges again into
another and more sheltered body of water, cinlit or ten
miles in length, and two or three in width, called Bed-
ford Basin.
On a nearer approach to the Quay, old dingy ware-
houses, trumpery wooden buildings, of unequal size
and disproportioned forms, and unsubstantial wharfs,
in bad order and repair, present an unpromising
water-side view, while the accent of the labourers and
truckmen who are nearlv all Irishmen form a sin<;ular
combination of colonial architecture and European
population. The city itself, which has been greatly
improved of late years, docs not, on a further ac(juaint-
ance, altogether remove the disagreeable impression.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 5
Although it boasts of many very handsome public as
well as private edifices, it is well laid out and embellished
with large naval and military establishments ; it has
not the neat or uniform appearance of an American
town, and it is some time before the eye becomes at;-
eustomed to the card-board appearance of the houses,
or the singular mixture of laroe and small ones in the
same street. The general aspect of the city is as dif-
ferent from that of any other provincial town, as it is
from a place of the same size either in Old or New
England. The inhabitants, who are composed of
English, Irish, Scotch, and their descendants, are
estimated at twenty-two or twenty-five thousand. It
is a gay and hospitable place, and, until recently, when
agitation and political strife made their baneful ap-
pearance, was a united and happy community.
It is not my intention to describe localities — my ob-
ject is to delineate Life in a Colony. There is such a
general uniformity in the appearance of all the country
towns and villages of these lower provinces, and such
a similarity in the character of the scenery, that details
would be but tedious repetitions, and, besides, such topo-
graphical sketches are to be found in every book of
travels on this continent. I have said thus much of
Halifax, because it is not only the capital of Nova
Scotia, but, from its proximity to Europe, has lately
become a most important station for English and Ame-
rican Atlantic steamers, as it always has been for the
British navy. A few words will suffice for Nova
6 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
Scotia. Tlio surface is uiidulatins::, seldom or never
exceeding in altitude five hundred feet above the level
of the sea. It is greatly intersected with rivers and
their tributary brooks, on the margins of which are
continuous lines of settlements, and the coast is every-
where indented with harbours more or less capacious,
in most of which are either towns or villages. In the
background, the forest is everywhere visible, and
penetrated in all directions with roads. Although
extensive clearings are made yearly in the interior,
principally by the children c>f old settlers, in which
backwood life is to be seen in all its simplicity, yet
the country has passed the period of youth, and may
now be called an old colony.
Of the habits, manners, and modes of thoufrht of
the people, few travellers have had such an opportunity
of becoming acquainted as I have. At the suggestion
of Mr. liarclay, a member of the provincial bar, with
whom I accidentally became acquainted on my arrival
at Halifax, I abandoned for a time my intention of
proceeding to New York, and from thence to the
South and West, and renuiiucd in this country for a
period sufficiently long to acquire that knowledge of
Anglo-American character without wliieh nij)id tra-
velling on this continent is neither convenient nor
instructive. J}y liiiii I was conducted to lUinoo, an
interior town, about fifty miles from Halifax, and
there introduced to Mr. Justice Sandford, a retired
Judge of the Supreme Court of Judicature. By the
LIFE IN A COLONY.
considerate kindness of these two gentlemen, I was
enabled to see all that was desirable to be seen, and to
understand many little points in the character of the
people, which, without their valuable explanations,
would have either escaped my notice, or have been un-
intelligible.
Illinoo is situated at the head of the naviga-
tion of the Tnganish river, and is a neat, thriving
town, consisting of about a hundred and fifty
wooden houses, painted white, after the prevailing
American taste, most of them being decorated with
green Venetian blinds, and all enclosed by board
fences of different patterns. The glare of the glossy
white is somewhat relieved by the foliage of the gar-
dens that everywhere surround the houses, and supply
the inhabitants with fruit and vegetables. Such is
Illinoo, the description of which will answer for any
other rural village, the difference in general being one
of situation, rather than appearance and of size, more
than beauty.
Three miles further up the river, and above the in-
fluence of the tide, is Elmsdale, the residence of Judge
Sandford. The house stands on a rising piece of
ground in the centre of an extensive island, formed
by two branches of the river, one of which is a small
brook of about twenty yards in width, and the other
the main stream. The island consists principally of
alluvial soil, but is interspersed here and there with
gently swelling knolls of loam, covered with oaks.
8 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
iiiaplo.'*, aiul yellow birches, while the meadow land is
decorated with lar^e single elms of immense size and
jjreat beauty. The nuiririn is secured airainst the
effects of the current bv the roots of the shumach, the
wild flowering pear, and dwarf rowan tree, and the
still stronirer network of the roots of the iriant elms
that enclose the place on all sides. On the south-west
and east, this valley is sheltered from the wind by
a mountainous ridge, through a winding and almost
concealed gorge, of which the river precipitately issues,
previously to its forming the biforcation that converts
Elmsdale into an island.
The house, which was built by the present pro-
prietor's father, an American Loyalist, is a large com-
modious cottage of one story in height, covering a great
deal of ground, and constructed after the manner of
the German settlers on the Hudson, having long pro-
jecting eves, and an extensive, elongated range of
buildings protruding from the back part, devoted to
the use of domestics and farm purposes, and which is
effectually concealed from view by an almost impene-
trable hedge-row of spruces. Two noble, primeval
elms, at either side of the hall-door, rejoice in their
native soil, and with their long, umbrageous, pendent
branches, equally deny admission to the rain and sun.
The interior of the house corresponds, to a great ex-
tent, with its outward appearance. The furniture is
in general old, solid, and heavy, like that used in our
former colonies before the rebellion, which contrasts
I
LIFE IN A COLONY. 9
oddly with an occasional article of lighter form, and
later and more fashionable manufacture. They are
types of the old and the present generation ; for, alas, it
is to be feared that what has been gained in appear-
ance has been lost in substance, in things of far more
value and importance. It is a place of great beauty
at all seasons of the year ; but, in spring, when vege-
tation first clothes the mountains, and in autumn, when
the frost tinges it with innumerable hues before it dis-
robes it, it is pre-eminently so. The forest, to which
you are attracted in summer by its grateful shade, is
rendered still more agreeable and cool, by the numerous
rapids and cascades of the river; and even winter, dreary
as it is everywhere in the country, is here stripped of
half its rigour, by the barrier the hills present to the
stormy winds.
To this hospitable and charming mansion I was so
fortunate as to be invited by the Judge, at the sugges-
tion, no doubt, of his nephew, my friend Mr. Barclay.
•• He will be delighted to see you,"" he said, as we
drove thither from the village. " He is one of those
persons with whom you will feel at home and at ease
at once. Such is the force of professional habit, that
there is something of judicial gravity in his manner
when abroad, or among those he does not know, but
there is not the least of it about him when at home,
or among his friends, A.lthough far advanced in years,
he is still as active in body and mind, as quick of per-
ception, and as fond of humour, as when he was at
B 5
10 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
tlio bar. He abounds in anoodotc; is remarkably well
informed for a lawyer, for their libraries necessarily
contain more heavy learning than lii^ht reading; and
he has great conversational powers, ki religion he is a
Churchman, and in politics a Conservative, as is
almost every gentleman in these colonies. On the
first subject he never speaks as a topic of discussion,
and on the latter very rarely, and then only to those
who, he knows, entertain similar opinions with him-
self. He will press you to make his house your home,
as far as is compatible with your other arrangements,
and 1 hope you will not fail to do so, for he is fond
of having his friends about him, and in this retired
place considers it a great piece of good fortune to have
an opportunity of conversing with a person whose
ideas are not all bounded by this little province. On
the other hand, you will find a kind, frank, but plain
hospitality, that is comfortable without being oppres-
sive ; and, as your object is information about colonial
life, I know of no man in this country so well qualified
or so willing to impart it as he is. There is capital
?ihooting and fishing on his grounds ; and, when you
feel inclined for a ride or a drive, either ho or his
niece (for he is an old bachelor) will be happy to
accompany you, while I am always on hand, and at
your service. Don't be afraid of my fair cousin," he
continued ; " thouu:h not too old to be agreeable, (for
my uncle is an instance of the dilliculty of deciding
when that period of life commences) she is of a cer-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 11
tain age, when she may be considered no longer
dangerous."
Leaving the highway, we crossed the brook that
separates the island from the main land over a rustic
arch, so constructed between clumps of large French
willows o-rowino; on the banks as to have the effect of
a natural bridfje. The road wound round the base of
a knoll, through a forest of elms, from which, with an
easy sweep, it suddenly terminated in front of the
house. From thence we proceeded to the garden,
where we understood the Judge was superintending
some improvements. This enclosure covers about
two acres of land, and embraces the fruitery, shrub-
bery, kitchen and flower garden ; thus combining use-
fiil with ornamental cultivation, and keeping both
within the limits of moderate means. In summer, he
spends most of his time here, when the weather
permits.
As soon as he perceived us, he advanced, and cor-
dially welcomed me to Elmsdale, which, he said, he
hoped I would make my head-quarters and consider
my home, as often and as long as I could, while in
this part of the country.
Though thin, his frame was strong, and well put
together, and therefore, though short in stature, he
could not be called a small man. In figure, he was
erect, and in motion active, while his quick bright eye,
notwithstanding the snowy whiteness of his hair, and
a face in which the traces of care and thought were
1- TJIIi; OLD JlDfiE ; OR,
"loeply marked, suggested the idea of a niucli younger
person than lie ri'ally was — an illusion not a little
aided by the sprlgiitliness of his conversation, and the
singular smoothness and expansion of the upper part
of his forehead.
In a few moments we were joined by Miss Sand-
ford, who entered tlie garden by a glass door from tlie
library, that opened upon the verandah where we were
standing, and admonished her uncle that, as every-
body was not quite as interested in gardening as he
was, it might not be amiss to recollect that it was the
liour of luncheon. From the ao;e aS well as the affec-
tion of these relatives, brother would have seemed to
be a more appropriate term for her to have used than
uncle ; but there was, in reality, a much greater dis-
parity between them in years, activity, and strength,
than there appeared to be at first sight. She was
admirably well (jualified to preside over his establish-
ment, and be his companion ; for she was a remark-
ably well-informed and agreeable woman, and, what
could scarcely be expected, and is rarely found in a
new country like this, was highly accomplished, which
latter advantaue she owed tu a lonij residence and
careful education in England.
Such was the place where I resided, and such the
people among whom 1 was domesticated so often and
so long. Having, like Boswell, kept a co})i()us journal
of the conversations I had with the Judge, I shall in
all instances let him speak for himself, as his power of
LIFE IN A COLONY. 13
description far exceeds mine. When he was not
present, I shall endeavour to delineate the scenes I
witnessed myself, without embellishment on the one
hand, and, as far as practicable, without prolixity on
the other.
14 THE OLD JLDtii:; OU,
CHAPTER IT.
HOW MANY FINS HAS A COD?
OR, FORTV YEARS AGO.
For several days past, nothing else lias been talked
of at Illinoo but the appi'oacliing term of the Supreme
Court. At all times, this is a great event for a quiet
village, where there is but little to diversify the mono-
tony of life ; but the arrival of the Judge and the
circuit lawyers is now looked forward to with great
interest, as there is to be a man tried for murder, who,
in all probability, will be convicted and executed. I
have much curiosity to see the mode of administering
justice in this country, because the state of the courts
is a very good criterion by which to estimate the state
of the province. The Bench and the Bar usually
furnish fair samples of the talent and education of the
gentry — the grand jury of the class inunediately below
them, and the petit-jury of the yeomanry and trades-
men. In a court-house, they are all to be seen in
juxtaposition, and a stranger is enabled to compare
them one with the other, with tiie condition of the
people and similar institutions in different countries.
The Judjre informs me that the first courts esta-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 15
blished in this province were County Courts, the Judges
of which were not professional men, but selected from the
magistrates of the district, who rendered their services
gratuitously. The efficiency of these courts, therefore,
depended wholly upon the character and attainments
of the Justices of the Peace in the neighbourhood.
In some instances, they were conducted with much
decorum, and not without ability ; in others, they pre-
sented scenes of great confusion and disorder ; but, in
all cases, they were the centre of attraction to the
whole county. The vicinity of the court-house was a
sort of fair, where people assembled to transact busi-
ness, or to amuse themselves. Horse -swapping or
racing, wrestling and boxing, smoking and drinking,
sales at auction, and games of various kinds, occupied
the noisy and not very sober crowd. The temperance
of modern times, the substitution of professional men
as judges, and an entire change of habits among the
people, have no less altered the character of the scenes
within than without the walls of these halls of justice.
In no respect is the improvement of this country so
apparent as in its judicial establishments. As an illus-
tration of the condition of some of these County Courts
in the olden time, the Judge related to me the follow-
ing extraordinary story that .occurred to himself: —
Shortly after my return from Europe, about forty
years ago, I attended the Western Circuit of the
Supreme Court, which then terminated at Annapolis,
and remained behind a few days, for the purpose of ex-
1(5 TIIR OLD JUDGE; OR,
aniininir that most interestinir place, which is tlie scene
of the first eftective settlement in North America.
While engaged in these investigations, a person
called upon me, and told me he liad ridden express
from Plymouth, to obtain my assistance in a cause
which was to be tried in a day or two in the county
court at that place. The judges were at that period,
as I have previously observed, not professional men,
but magistrates, and equally unable to administer law,
or to preserve order ; and the verdicts generally de-
pended more upon the declamatory powers of the law-
yers than the merits of the causes. The distance was
great — the journey had to be performed on horseback
— the roads were bad, the accomuiodation worse. 1
had a great repugnance to attend these courts under
any circumstances ; and, besides, had pressing engage-
ments at home. I therefore declined acceptino- his
retainer, which was the largest that at that time had
ever been tendered to me, and begged to be excused.
If the fee, he said, was too small to render it worth
my while to go, hv would cheerfully double it, for
money was no object. The cause was one of great im-
portance to his friend, Mr. John Ikrkins, and of deep
interest to the whole community ; and, as the few
lawyers that resided within a liundred miles of the
place were engaged on the other side, if I did not go,
his unfortunate friend would fall a victim to the in-
trigues and injustice of his opponents. In short, he
was so urgent, that at last I was prevailed upon to con-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 17
sent, and we set off together to prosecute our journey-
on horseback. The agent, Mr. WiUiam Robins (who
had the most accurate and capacious memory of any
man I ever met), proved a most entertaining and
agreeable companion. He had read a great deal, and
retained it all ; and, having resided many years near
Plymouth, knew ever}'^ body, every place, and every
tradition. Withal, he was somewhat of a humourist.
Finding him a person of this description, my curiosity
was excited to know who and what he was ; and I
put the question to him.
" I am of the same profession you are, sir," he said.
I immediately reined up.«
•' If that be the case," I replied, "my good friend,
you must try the cause yourself. I cannot consent to
go on. The only thing that induced me to set out with
you was your assertion that every lawyer, within a
hundred miles of Plymouth, was retained on the other
side."
" Excuse me, sir," he said, " I did not say I was a
lawyer."
" No," I observed, " you did not ; but you stated
that you were of the same profession as myself, which
is the same thing."
•' Not exactly, sir," he said. " I am a wrecker. I
am Lloyds'' agent, and live on the misfortunes of others ;
so do you. When a vessel is wrecked, it is my busi-
ness to get her off, or to save the property. When a
man is entangled among the shoals or quicksands of
18 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
the law, your duty is similar. Wo are both wreckers,
and, therefore, members of the same profession. The
only diftercnee is, you are a lawyer, and I am not."
This absurd reply removing all dilHculty, we pro-
ceeded on our journey; and the first night after passing
through Digby reached Sliingle Town, or Spaitsville,
the origin of which, as he related it to me, was the
most whimsical story 1 ever heard. It is rather long
for an episode, and I Avill tell it to you some otlier
time. The next morning we reached Clare, a town-
ship wholly owned and occupied by French Acadians,
the descendants of those persons who first settled at
Port Royal (as I have just related), and other parts
of the province into which they had penetrated, pre-
vious to the occupation of the English. I will not
trouble you with the melancholy history of these people
at present; I only allude to them now on account of a
little incident in our journey. As we approached the
chapel, we saw a large number of persons in front of
tlie priest\s house, having either terminated or being
about to commence a procession. As soon as Robins
saw them, he said —
" Now, T will make every man of tliat congregation
take oft' his hat to nie."
" How r
" You shall see."
He soon pulled up opposite to a large wooden cross
that stood by the way-side, and, taking oft" his hat,
bowed his head most reverently and respectfully down
LIFE IX A COLONY. 19
to the horse's neck, and then, slowly covering again,
passed on. When we reached the crowd, every hat
was lifted in deference to the devout stranger, who had
thus courteously or piously saluted the emblem of their
faith. As soon as we had escaped the wondering gaze
of the people, he observed —
" There, lawyer, there is a useful lesson in life for
you. He who respects the religious feelings of others,
will not fail to win indulijence for his own.""
In the afternoon we arrived at Plvmouth. As we
entered the village, I observed that the court-house as
usual was surrounded by a noisy multitude, some de-
tached groups of which appeared to be discussing the
trials of the morning, or anticipating that which was
to engross the attention of the public on the succeeding
day. On the opposite side of the road was a large
tavern, the hospitable door of which stood invitingly
open, and permitted the escape of most agreeable and
seducino; odours of rum and tobacco. The crowd occu-
pied and filled the space between the two buildings,
and presented a moving and agitated surface ; and yet
a strong current was perceptible to a practised eye in
this turbid mass, setting steadily out of the court-
house, and passing slowly but constantly through the
centre of this estuary into the tavern, and returning
again in an eddy on either side.
Where every one was talking at the same time, no
individual could be heard or understood at a distance,
but the united vociferations of the assembled hundreds
20 THE OLD Jl DCiK; OR,
blended togetlier, and formed the deep-toned but disso-
nant voice of that hydra-headed monster, the crowd.
On a nearer approach, the sounds that composed
this unceasin<>- roar became more distinouishablc. The
drunken man might be lieard rebuking the profane, and
the profane overwliehning the hypocrite witli oppro-
brium for his cant. Neighbours, rendered amiable by
liquor, embraced as brothers, and loudly proclaimed
their unchangeable friendship ; while the memory of
past injuries, awakened into fury by the li<juid poison,
placed others in hostile attitude, who hurled defiance
and abuse at each other, to the full extent of their
lungs or their vocabulary. The slow, measured, nasal
talk of the dejrenerate settler from I'uritanical New
England, was rendered unintelligible by the ceaseless
and rapid utterance of the French fisherman ; while
poor Pat, bludgeon in hand, uproariously solicited his
neighbours to fight or to drink, and generously gave
them their option. Even the dogs caught the infec-
tion of the place, and far above their masters'" voices
miiiht occasionally be heard the loud, sharp cry of
triumph, or the more shrill howl of distress uttered
by these animals, who, with as little cause as their
senseless owners, had engaged in a stupid conflict.
A closer inspection revealed the groupings with more
painful distinctness. Here, might be seen the merry,
active Negro, flapping his mimic wings and crowing
like a cock in token of defiance to all his sable brethren,
or dancing to the sound of his own musical voice, and
LIFE IN A COLONY. 21
terminating every evolution with a scream of delight.
There, your attention was arrested by a ferocious-
looking savage, who, induced by the promise of liquor,
armed with a scalping-knife in one hand and a toma-
hawk in the other, exhibited his terrific war-dance,
and uttered his demoniac yells, to the horror of him
who personated the victim, and suffered all the pangs
of martyrdom in trembling apprehension that that
which had begun in sport might end in reality, and to
the infinite delight of a circle of boys, whose morals
were thus improved and confirmed by the conversation
and example of their fathers. At the outer edge of
the throng miffht be seen a woman, endeavourino- to
persuade or to force her inebriated husband to leave
this scene of sin and shame, and return to his neg-
lected home, his family, and his duties. Now, success
crowns her untirin2: exertions, and he vields to her
tears and entreaties, and gives himself up to her gentle
guidance ; when suddenly the demon within him rebels,
and he rudely bursts from her feeble but affectionate
hold, and returns, shouting and roaring like a maniac,
to his thoughtless and noisy associates. The enduring
love of the agonized woman prompts her again and
airain to renew the effort, until at last some kind friend,
touched by her sorrows and her trials, lends her the
aid of his powerful arm, and the truant man is led off
captive to what was once a happy home, but now a
house of destitution and distress. These noises ceased
for a moment as we arrived at the spot, and were super-
22 ' THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
seded by a comnuind issued by several persons at the
same time.
" Clear the road there ! Make way for the p;entle-
men !"
We had been anxiously expected all the afternoon,
and the command was instantly obeyed, and a passage
opened for us by the people falling back on either side
of the street. As we passed through, my friend checked
liis horse into a slow walk, and led me with an air of
triumph, such as a jockey displays in bringino; out his
favourite on the course. Robins was an important man
that day. He had succeeded in his mission. He had
got his champion, and would be ready for fight in the
morning. It was but reasonable, therefore, he thought,
to indulge the public with a glimpse at his man. He
nodded familiarly to some, winked slily to others,
saluted people at a distance aloud, and shook hands
patronisingly with those that were nearest. He would
occasionally lag behind a moment, and say, in an under
but very audible tone —
" Precious clever fellow that ! Sees it all — says
we are all right — sure to win it ! I wouldn't be in
those fellows the plaintiff's skins to-morrow for a trifle !
He is a powerful man, that !" and so forth.
The first opportunity that occurred, I endeavoured
to put a stop to this trumpeting.
" For Heaven's sake," I said, " my good friend, do
not talk such nonsense ; if you do, you will ruin me !
I am at all times a diflident man, but, if you raise such
LIFE IN A COLONY. 23
expectations, I shall assuredly break down, from the
vexy fear of not fulfilling them. I know too well the
doubtful issue of trials ever to say that a man is
certain of winning. Pray do not talk of me in this
manner."
" You are sure, sir," he said. " What, a man who
has just landed from his travels in Europe, and arrived,
after a journey of one hundred miles, from the last
sitting of the Supreme Court, not to know more than
any one else ! Fudge, sir ! I congratulate you, you
have gained the cause ! And besides, sir, do you think
that if William Robins says he has got the right man
(and he wouldn't say so if he didn't think so), that
that isn't enough? Why, sir, your leather breeches
and top-boots are enough to do the business ! Nobody
ever saw such things here before, and a man in buck-
skin must know more than a man in homespun. But
here is Mrs. Brown's inn ; let us dismount. I have
procured a private sitting-room for you, which on court-
days, militia trainings, and times of town meetings or
elections, is not very easy, I assure you. Come, walk
in, and make yourself comfortable."
We had scarcely entered into our snuggery, which
was evidently the landlady's own apartment, when the
door was softly opened a few inches, and a beseeching
voice was heard, saying —
" Billy, is that him \ If it is, tell him it's me ; will
you ? that's a good soul !"
" Come in — come in, old Blowhard !" said Robins ;
24 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
an d, seizing the stranger by the hand, he led him up,
and introduced him to me.
" Lawyer, this is Captain John Barkins ! — Captain
IJarkins, this is Lawyer Sandford ! He is our client,
lawyer, and I must say one thing for him : he has but
two faults, but they are enough to ruin any man in this
province; he is an honest man, and speaks the truth.
I will leave vou together now, and go and order vour
dinner for you."
John Barkins was a tall, corpulent, amj)hibious-
looking man, that seemed as if he would be equally at
home in either element, land or water. He held in his
hand what he called a nor'-wester, a large, broad-
brimmed, glazed hat, with a peak projecting behind to
shed the water from off his club queue, which was
nearly as thick as a hawser. He wore a long, narrow-
tailed, short-waisted blue coat, with large, white-plated
buttons, that resembled Spanish dollars, a red waist-
coat, a spotted Bandanna silk handkerchief tied loosely
about his throat, and a pair of voluminous, corduroy
trousers, of the colour of brown soap, over which were
drawn a pair of fisher)nen''s boots, that reached nearly
to his knees. His waistcoat and his trousers were ap-
parently^ not upon very intimate terms, for, though they
travelled together, the latter were taught to feel their
subjection, but, when they lagged too far behind, they
were brought to their place by a jerk of impatience
that threatened their very existence. He had a thick,
matted head of black hair, and a pair of whiskers that
LIFE IN A COLONY. 25
disdained tlie eiFcminacy of either scissors or razor, and
revelled in all the exuberant and wild profusion of
nature. His countenance was much weather-beaten
from constant exposure to the vicissitudes of heat and
cold, but was open, good-natured, and manly. Such
was mv client. He advanced and shook me cordially
by the hand.
" Glad to see you, sir," he said; " you are welcome
to Plymouth. IVIy name is John Barkins ; I dare say
you have often heard of me, for everybody knows me
about these parts. Any one will tell you what sort of
a man John Barkins is. That's me — that's my name,
do you see ? 1 am a parsecuted man, lawyer ; but I
ain't altogether quite run down yet, neither. I have a
case in court ; I dare say Mr. Eobins has told you of
it. He is a very clever man is old Billy, and as smart
a chap of his age as you will see anywhere a'most. 1
suppose you have often heard of him before, for every-
body knows William Robins in these parts. It's the
most important case, sir, ever tried in this county. If
I lose it, Plymouth is done. There's an end to the
fisheries, and a great many of us are a going to sell off
and quit the country."
I will not detail his cause to you in his own words,
because it will fatigue you as it wearied me in hearing
it. It possessed no public interest whatever, though
it was of some importance to himself as regarded the
result. It appeared that he had fitted out a large
vessel for the Labradore fishery, and taken with him
VOL. i. C
26 THE OLD JUDGE J OR,
a very full crew, who were to share in the profits or
loss of the adveuture. The agreement, which was a
verbal one, was, that on the completion of the voyage
the cargo should be sold, and the net proceeds be dis-
tributed in equal portions, one half to appertain to the
captain and vessel, and the other half to the crew, and
to be equally divided among them. The undertaking
was a disastrous one, and on their return the seamen
repudiated the bargain, and sued him for wages. It
was, therefore, a very simple atlair, being a mere ques-
tion of fact as to the partnership, and that depending
wholly on the evidence. Having ascertained these
particulars, and inquired into the nature of the proof
by which his defence was to be supported, and given
him his instructions, I requested him to call upon me
again in the morning before Court, and bowed to him
in a manner too significant to be misunderstood. He,
however, still lingered in the room, and, turning his
hat round and round several times, examining the
rim very carefully, as if at a loss to discover the front
from the back part of it, he looked up at last, and
said —
" Lawyer, I have a favour to ask of you."
" What is it T I inquired.
" There is a man," he replied, " coming agin me to-
moiTOw as a witness, of the name of Lillum. He
thinks himself a great judge of the fisheries, and he
does know a considerable some, I must say ; but, d
him ! I caught fish afure he was born, and know more
LIFE IN A COLONY. 27
about fishing than all the Lillums of Plymouth put
together. Will j'ou just ask him one question V
" Yes, fifty, if a^ou like."
" Well, I only want you to try him with one, and
that will choke him. Ask him if he knows ' how many
fins a cod has, at a word.' "
" What has that got to do with the cause f I said,
with unfei2:ned astonishment.
" Eveni;hing, sir," he answered ; " everything in
the world. If he is to come to give his opinion on
other men's business, the best way is to see if he knows
his o\\T3. Tarnation, man ! he don't know a cod-fish
when he sees it ; if he does, he can tell you ' how many
fins it has, at a word.' It is a great catch that. I liave
won a great many half-pints of brandy on it. I never
knew a feller that could answer that question yet, right
ofl^ the reel."
He then explained to me that, in the enumeration,
one small fin was always omitted by those who had
not previously made a minute examination.
" Now, sir," said he, " if he can't cipher out that
question (and I'll go a hogshead of rum on it he can't),
turn him right out of the box, and tell him to go a
voyage with old John Barkins — that's me, my name is
John Barkins — and he will larn him his trade. AVill
you ask him that question, lawyer V
" Certainly," I said, " if you wish it."
" You will gain the day. then, sir," he continued,
c2
28 THE OTJ) .TIDGR ; OR,
much elated; " you will gain the day, then, as .sure as
fate. Good-by, lawyer!"
When he had nearly reached the foot of the stair-
case, I heard him returning, and. opening the door, he
looked in and said —
" You won't forget, will you ? — mj^ name is John
Barkins ; ask anylM)dy about here, and they will tell
you who 1 am, for everybody knows John IJarkins in
these parts. The other man's name is Lilluiii — a very
decent, 'sponsible-looking man, too ; but he don't know
everything. Take him up all short. ' How many
fins has a cod, at a word V says you. If you can lay
him on the broad of his back with that <juestion, I
don't care a farthins if I lose the case. It's a irreat
satisfaction to nonplusli a knowin' one that way. You
kniiw the question ?"
" Yes, yes," I replied, impatiently. " I know all
about it."
"■ You do, do you, sir?" said he, shutting the door
behind him, and advancing towards me, and looking
me steadily in the fiice ; " you do, do you i Then,
' how many fins has a cod, at a word f "
I answered as he had instructed me.
*' Gad, sir," he said, " it's a pity your father hadn't
made a fisherman of you, for you know more about a
cod now than any man in Plymouth but one, old John
Barkins — that's me, my name is John Barkins. Every-
body knows me in these parts. Bait your hook with
that question, and you'll catch old Lillum, I know.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 29
As soon as he has it in his gills, drag him riglit out
of the water. Give him no time to play — in with
him, and whap him on the deck ; hit him hard over
the head — it will make him open his mouth, and your
hook is ready for another catch."
" Good night, Mr. Barkins," I replied ; " call on
me in the mornino-. I am fatii^ued now.""
" Good night, sir," he answered ; " you won't
forjjet ?"
Dinner was now announced, and my friend Mr,
Robins and myself sat down to it with an excellent
appetite. Having done ample justice to the good
clieer of Mrs, Brown, and finished our wine, we drew
up to the fire, which, at that season of the year, was
most acceptable in the morning and evening, and
smoked our cigars. Robins had so many good stories,
and told them so uncommonly well, that it was late
before we retired to rest. Instead of beins; shown into
the bed- room I had temporarily occupied for changing
my dress before dinner, I was ushered info a long,
low room, fitted up on either side with berths, with a
locker running round the base, and in all respects,
except the skylight, resembling a cabin. Strange as
it appeared, it was in keeping with the place (a fishing
port), its population, and the habits of the people.
Mrs, Brown, the landlady, was the widow of a sea-
faring man, who had, no doubt, fitted up the chamber
in this manner with a view to economize room, and
thus accommodate as many passengers (as he would
30 TIIK OT,n .TUDGK ; OR,
designate his guests) as possible in this sailor''s home.
A hmip hung suspended from the ceihng, and ap-
peared to be supplied and trimmed for the night, so
as to afford easy access and egress at all hours. It
was almost impossible not to imagine one's self at sea,
on board of a crowded coasting-packet. Retreat was
impossible, and therefore I made up my mind at once
to submit to this whimsical arrauijement for the nijjht,
and, having undressed myself, was about to climb into
a vacant berth near the door, when some one opposite
called out —
" Lawyer, is that you ?"
It was my old tormentor, the skipper. Upon ascer-
taining wlio it was, he immediately got out of bed,
and crossed over to where I was standing. He had
nothing on but a red nightcap, and a short, loose
check shirt, wide open at the throat and breast. He
looked like a huge bear walking upon his hind-legs, he
was f;o hairy and shaggy. Seizing me by the shoulders,
he clasped me tightly round the neck, and whispered —
" ' How many fins has a cod, at a word V That's
the question. You won't forget, will you V
" No," I said, " I not only will not forget it to-
morrow, but I shall recollect you and your advice as
loni; as I live. Now let me jret some rest, or I shall
be unable to plead your cause for you, as I am ex-
cessively fatigued and very drowsy."
" Certainly, certainly," he said ; ^ turn in, but don't
forget the catch."
LIFE IN A COLONY. SI
It was some time before the hard bed, the fatigues
of the journey, and the novelty of the scene, permitted
me to compose myself for sleep ; and just as I was
dropping off into a slumber, I heard the same un-
welcome sounds —
" Lawyer, lawyer, are you asleep V
I affected not to hear him, and, after another in-
effectual attempt on his part to rouse me, he desisted ;
but I heard him mutter to himself —
" Plague take the sarpent ! hell forget it and lose
all : a feller that falls asleep at the helm, ain"'t fit to
be trusted no how."
I was not doomed, however, to obtain repose upon
such easy terms. The skipper's murmurs had scarcely
died away, when a French fisherman from St. Mary''s
Bay entered the room, and, stumbling over my saddle-
bags, which he anathematized in bad French, bad
English, and in a language compounded of both, and
embellished with a few words of Indian origin, he
called out loudly —
" Celestine, are you here f
This interrogatory was responded to by another
from the upper end of the room —
" Is that you, Baptiste? Which way is the wind?"
" Nor'-nor'-west."
" Then I must sail for Halifax to-morrow."
While Baptiste was undressing, an operation which
was soon performed (with the exception of the time
lost in pulling off an obstinate and most intractable
32 THE OLD JL'DGE; OK,
j)air of boots), tl»c following absurd conversation took
jilace. Upon hearing tlio word ITalifac, (as ho called
it) ]3apt)ste expressed great horror of the place, and
especially the red devils (the soldiers) with which it
was infested. He said the last time he was there, as
he was passing the King''s Wharf to go to his vessel
late at night, the sentinel called out to him, " Who
come dare V to which impertinent question he jjave
no answer. The red villain, he said, repeated the
-challenge louder than before, but, as he knew it was
none of his business, he did not condescend to reply.
The soldier then demanded, in a voice of thunder, for
the third time, " Who come dare V " to which," to
nse his own words, " I answer liini, ' What the devil
is that to you V and ran off so fast as my legs would
carry me, and faster too ; but the villain knew the
way better nor me, and just stuck his ' bagonut*" right
into my thigh, ever so far as one inch. Oh !" said
Baptiste (who had become excited by the recollection
of the insult, and began to jump about the floor,
makins a most villauous clatter with the half-drawn
boot), " Oh ! I was very mad, you may depend. I
could have nmrder him, I was so vexed. Oh ! I wa.s
so d mad, I ran straight off to the vessel without
stopping, and — ;jumped right into bed."
Celestine expressed great indignation at such an
unprovoked and cowardly assault, and advised him, if
ever he caught that soldier again, alone and unarmed,
and had his two grown-up sons, Lewis and Dominique,
LIFE IN A COLONY. 33
with him, to give him a sound drubbing, and then
weigh anchor, and sail right out of the harbour. He
congratulated himself, however, that if the soldier had
run the point of his bayonet into his friend, he had
lately avenged it by making a merchant there feel the
point of a joke that was equally sharp, and penetrated
deeper. He had purchased goods, he said, of a trader
at Halifax upon this express promise —
" If you will trust me this spring, I will pay you
last fall. The merchant," he observed, " thought I
was talking bad English, but it is very good English ;
and when last fall comes again, I will keep my word
and pay him, but not till then. Don't he hope he may
get his money the day before yesterday V
Baptiste screamed with delight at this joke, which,
he said, he would tell his wife Felicite, and his two
daughters, Angelique and Blondine, as soon as he
returned home. Having succeeded at last in escaping
from his tenacious boot, he turned in, and, as soon as
his head touched the pillow, was sound asleep.
In tlie morning when I awoke, the first objects that
met my eye were the Bandanna handkerchief, the red
waistcoat and blue coat, while a goodnatured face
watched over me with all the solicitude of a parent for
the first moments of wakefulness.
" Lawyer, are you awaked said Barkins. "This
is the great day — the greatest day Plymouth ever saw !
We shall know now whether we are to carry on the
fisheries, or give them up to the Yankees. Every-
c 5
34 THK OLD JIDOE ; OR,
thing depends upon that question ; for Heaven''s sake,
don''t forjret it ! — ' How many fins has a cod, at a
word C It is very late now. It is eight o\dock, and
the courts meet at ten, and the town is full. All the
folks from Chebogue, and Jegoggin, and Salmon River,
and Beaver Eiver, and Eel Brook, and Polly Crossby's
Hole, and the Gut and the Devil's Island, and Ragged
Island, and far and near, are come. It's a great day and
a great catch. I never lost a bet on it yet. You may win
many a half-pint of brandy on it, if you won't forget it."
"Do go away and let me dress myself!'" I said,
petulantly. " I won't forget you."
" Well, I'll go below," he replied, " if you wish it,
but call for me when you want me. ISIy name is
John Barkius ; ask any one for me, for every man
knows John Barkins in these parts. But, dear me,"
he continued, " I forgot !" and, taking an enormous
key out of his pocket, he opened a sea-chest, from
which he drew a large glass decanter, highly gilt, and
a rummer of corresponding dimensions, with a golden
edsre. Takinji the bottle in one hand and the o-lass in
the other, ho drew the small round gilt stopper with
liis mouth, and, pouring out about half a pint of the
liquid, he said, " Here, lawyer, take a drop of bitters
this morning, just to warm the stomach and clear
your throat. It's excellent ! It is old Jamaiky
and sarsy-parilly, and will do your heart good. It's
an antifogmatic, and will make you as hungry as a
shark, and as lively as a thrasher !"
LIFE IN A COLONY. 35
' I shook my head in silence and despair, for I saw
he was a man there was no escaping from.
" You won't, eh V
" No, thank you, I never take anything of the kind
in the mornino-."
" Where the deuce was you broughten up," he
asked, with distended eyes, "that you haven't lost
the taste of your mother's milk yet ? You are worse
than an Isle of Sable colt, and them wild, ontamed
devils suckle for two years ! Well, if you won't, I will,
then ; so here goes," and holding back his head, the
potion vanished in an instant, and he returned the
bottle and the glass to their respective places. As he
went, slowly and sulkily, down stairs, he muttered,
" Hang him ! he's only a fresh-water fish that, after
all ; and they ain't even fit for bait, for they have
neither substance nor flavour !"
After breakfast, Mr. Robins conducted me to the
court-house, which was filled almost to sufibcation.
The panel was immediately called, and the jury placed
in the box. Previous to their being sworn, I inquired
of Barkins whether any of them were related to the
plaintifi's, or had been known to express an opinion
adverse to his interests ; for if such was the case, it
was the time to challenge them. To my astonishment,
he immediately rose and told the judges he challenged
the whole jury, the bench of magistrates, and every
man in the house, — a defiance that was accompanied
by a menacing outstretched arm and clenched fist. A
'■Hi TIIK OM) .rilH;K ; OR,
shout of l:iui|,hter that nearly sliook the walls of the
hiiildiii"- followed this violent outbreak. Nothing'
daunted by their ridicule, however, he returned to the
charge, and said, i.
" I repeat it ; I challenge the whole of you, if you
dare !"
Here the Court interposed, and asked him what he
meant by such indecent behaviour.
" Meant !" he said, " I mean what I say. The
strange lawyer here tells me now is my time to chal-
lenge, and I claim my right ; I do challenge any or
all of you ! Pick out any man present you please,
take the smartest chap youVe got, put us both on
board the same vessel, and I challenge him to catch,
spit, clean, salt, and stow away as many fish in a day
as I can, — cod, polluck, shad, or mackerel j I dou''t
care which, for it's all the same to me ; and Y\\ go a
liojjshead of rum on it I beat him ! W\\\ anv man
take up the challenge V and he turned slowly round
and examined the whole crowd. " You won't, won''t
you I I guess not ; you know a trick worth two of
that, I reckon ! There, lawyer, there is my challenge;
now ao on with the cause !"
As soon as order was restored the jury Avere sworn,
and the plantiff's counsel opened his case and called
liis witnesses, the last of whom was Mr. Lillum.
" That's him !" said liarkins, putting both arms
round my neck and nearly choking me, as he whis-
pered, "Ask him 'how many fins a cod has, at a
LIFE IN A COLONY. 37
word V " I now stood up to cross-examine him, when I
was again in the skipper''s clutches. " Don't forget !
the question is ...."
" If .you do not sit down immediately, sir," I said,
in a loud and authoritative voice (for the scene had
become ludicrous), " and leave me to conduct the
cause my own way, I shall retire from the Court !"
He sat down, and, groaning audibly, put both hands
before his face and muttered,—
" There is no dependence on a man that sleeps at
the helm !"
I commenced, however, in the way my poor client
desired : for I saw plainly that he was more anxious of
what he called stumping old Lillum and nonplushing
him, than about the result of his trial, although he
was firmly convinced that the one depended on the
other.
" How many years have you been engaged in the
Labrador fishery, sir ?"
" Twenty-five."
" You are, of course, perfectly conversant with the
cod-fisherv V'
" Perfectly. I know as much, if not more, about it
than any man in Plymouth."'*'
Here Barkins pulled my coat, and most beseech-
ingly said, —
" Ask him "
" Be quiet, sir, and do not interrupt me !" was the
consolatory reply he received.
f ^ ~* a*"^* ^ « j-^. ^ — Ik
38 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
" Of course, then, after such loug experience, sir,
you know a cod-fish wlien you see it V
" I shoukl think so !"
" That will not do, sir. Will you swear that you
dor
" I do not come here to be made a fool of!"
"■ Nor I either, sir ; I require you to answer yes or
no. Will you undertake to swear that you know a
cod-fish when you see it V
" I will, sir."
Here Barkins rose and struck the table with his fist
a blow that nearly split it, and, turning to me, said, —
"Ask him ...."
" Silence, sir !" I again vociferated. " Let there
be no mistake," I continued. " I will repeat the
question. Do you undertake to swear that you know
a cod-fish when you see it ?"
" I do, sir, as well as I know my own name when I
see it."
" Then, sir, how many fins has a cod, at a word V
Here the blow was given, not on the deal slab of
the table, but on my back, with such force as to throw
me forward on my two hands.
"Ay, floor him!*' said Barkins, "let him answer
that question ! The lawyer lias you there ! How
many fins has a cod, at a word, you old sculpin ?"
" I can answer you that without hesitation."
" How many, then ?"
" Let me see — three on the back, and two on the
LIFE IN A COLONY. 39
belly, that's five ; two on the nape, that"'s seven ; and
two on the shoulder, tliat''s nine. Nine, sir !"
" Missed it, by Gosh !" said Barkins. " Didn't I
tell you so I I knew he couldn't answer it. And yet
that fellow has the impudence to call himself a fisher-
man !"
Here I requested the Court to interfere, and compel
ray unfortunate and excited client to be silent.
" Is there not a small fin beside T' I said, "between
the under jaw and the throat V
" I believe there is."
" You believe ! Then, sir, it seems you are in
doubt, and that you do not know a cod-fish when you
see it. You may go; I will not ask you another
question. Go, sir ! but let me advise you to be more
careful in your answers for the future."
There was a universal shout of laughter in the
Court, and Barkins availed himself of the momentary
noise to slip his hand under the table and grip me by
the thigh, so as nearly to sever the flesh from the
bone.
" Bless your soul, my stout fresh-water fish !" he
said ; " you have gained the case, after all ! Didn't I
tell you he couldn't answer that question ? It's a great
great catch, isn't it ?"
The plaintiffs had wholly failed in their proof. In-
stead of contenting themselves with showing the voy-
age and their services, from which the law would have
presumed an assumpsit to pay wages according to the
40 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
ordinary course of business, and leaving the defendant
to prove that the agreement was a special one, they
attempted to prove too nmch, by establishing a nega-
tive ; and, in doing so, made out a sufficient defence
for Barkins. Knowing how much depended upon the
last address to the jury, when the judge was incompe-
tent to direct or control their decision, I closed on the
plaintift"s case, and called no witnesses. The jury were
informed by the judge, that, having now heard the
case on the part of the plaintiffs and also on the part
of the defendants, it was their duty to make up their
minds, and find a verdict for one or the other. After
tliis very able, intelligible, and impartial charge, the
jury were conducted to their room, and the greater
part of the audience adjourned to the neighbouring
tavern for refreshment. The judges then put on their
hats, for the air of the hall felt cold after the with-
drawal of so many persons, and the president asked me
to go and take a seat on the bench with them.
" That was a very happy tliought of yours, sir,"" he
remarked, " about the fins. 1 don^t think another
lawyer in the province but yourself knows how many
fins a cod has. A man who has travelled as nmch as
you have, has a great advantage. If you had never
been in Enirland, vou never would have learned that,
for you never would have crossed the banks of New-
foundland, and seen the great fishery there. IJut this
is dull work ; let us retreat into the adjoining room,
and have a smoke until the jury returns. They will
LIFE IN A COLONY. 41-
."aoon be back, and I think I may venture to say you
are sure of a verdict. You displayed great skill in that
matter of the fins."
Just as we were about retiring, our attention was
arrested by a great noise, occasioned by a constable
endeavouring to remove a turbulent and drunken fellow
from the court. The judge promptly interfered, fined
him five shillings for his contemptuous conduct, and
directed the prothonotary to lay it out in purchasing a
bottle of wine wherewith to drink the health of the
Stranger Lawyer. Having settled this little matter
to his satisfaction, he led the way to the anteroom,
where pipes were provided, and the officer soon ap-
peared with the wine and some glasses. Filling a
tumbler, the prothonotary apologized for not being able
to remain with us, and drank respectfully to the health
of the Court.
" Stop, sir !" said the judge ; " stop, sir ! Your
conduct is unpardonable ! I consider your behaviour a
great contempt in helping yourself first. I fine you
five shillings for your indecent haste, and request you
to pay it immediately in the shape of a bottle of brandy ;
for that wine," of which he took a tumbler full by way
of tasting, " is not fit for a gentleman to drink."
" A very forward fellow that prothonotary !" said
the legal dignitary, as the officer withdrew.
" Instead of being contented with being the clerk of
the court, he wants to be the master of it, and I find it
necessary to keep him in his place. Only think of his
42 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
confounded impudence in presuming to lielp liimself
first ! He would drink the millpoud dry if it was wine,
and then compUiin it didn't hold enough ! For my
own part, I am obliged to be very abstemious now, as
I am subject to the gout. I never exceed two bottles
of late years, and I rectify the acidity of the wine by
taking a glass of clear brandy (which I call the naked
truth) between every two of Madeira. Ah, here is the
brandy, lawyer ! Your very good health, sir — pray
help yourself; and, Mr. Prothonotary, liere's better
manners to you in future. Seniores priores, sir, that's
the rule."
Here the constable knocked at the door, and an-
nounced that the jury were in attendance.
" Don't rise, Mr. Sandford," said the judge ; " let
them wait : haste is not dignified. Help yourself, sir;
this is very good brandy. I always like to let them
appear to wait upon me, instead of their thinking I
wait upon them. What with the prothonotary tread-
ing on my toes and the jury on my heels, I have enough
to do to preserve the dignity of the court, I assure you.
But Temp us prwterlahetur est, as we used to say at
Cambridge, Massachusetts ; that is, John Adams,
senior, and our class, for I was contemporary with that
talented and distinguished — ahem — stingy rebel ! Help
yourself, sir. Come, I won't leave any of this aqua
vkw for that thirsty prothonotary. There, sir," he
said, smacking his lips with evident delight, " there is
the JinU and his /ine. Now let us go into court. But
LIFE IN A COLONY. 43
give me your arm, sir, for I think I feel a sliglit t^yinge of
that abominable gout. A dreadful penalty that, that
Nature assesses on gentility. But not so fast, if you
please, sir! true dignity delights in otium, or leisure ; but
abhors negotium^ or hurry. Haste is the attribute of a
prothonotary, who writes, talks, and drinks as fast as he
can, but is very unbecoming the gravity and majesty of
the law. The gait of a judge should be slow, stately, and
solemn. But here we are, let us take our respective seats."
As soon as we made our appearance, the tumultuous
wave of the crowd rushed into the courthouse, and,
surging backward and forward, gradually settled down
to a level and tranquil surface. The panel was then
called over, and the verdict read aloud. It was for
the defendant.
Barkins was not so much elated as I had expected.
He appeared to have been prepared for any event. He
had had his gratification already. " Old Lillum was
floored," the " knowing one had been uonplushed,"
and he was satisfied. He had a duty to perform, how-
ever, which he did with great pleasure, and I have no
doubt with great liberality. The jury were to be
" treated," for it was the custom of those days for the
winning party to testify his gratitude by copious liba-
tions of brandy and rum. As soon as the verdict was
recorded, he placed himself at their head, and led the
way to the tavern with as much gravity and order as
if he was conductins: a o-uard of honour. As soon as
they were all in the street, he turned about, and walking
44^ THE OLD JUDfJE; OR,
backwards so as to face tlicm, and at the same time
not to interrupt tlieir progress to that mansion of bUss,
he said,
" A pretty fellow that Lilliim, ain^t he ? to swear
b(^ knew what a cod was, and yet couldn't tell how
many fins it had, at a word ! "SVho would have thought
tluit milksop of a lawyer would have done so well? He
actually scared mo when I first saw him ; for a feller
tliat smokes cigars instead of a pipe, drinks red ink
(port wine) instead of old Jamaiky, and has a pair of
hands as white as the belly of a flat fish, ain't worth
his pap, in a general way. Howsumdcver, it don't do
to hang a feller for his looks, after all, that's a fact ;
for that crittur is hke a sinoed cat, better nor he seems.
J3ut, come, let's liquor !"
I did not see him again till the evening, when he
came to congratulate me upon having done the hand-
somest thing, he said, as every body allowed, that
ever was done in Plymouth, — shown the greatest fish-
erman in it (in his own conceit) that he didn't know a
cod-fisli when he saw it.
'• It was a great catch that, lawyer," he continued, and
he raised me up in his arms and walked round the
room with me as if he were carrying a baby. " Don't
forget it, ' How many fins has a cod, at a word V Yaw
never need to want a half-pint of brandy while you
have that fact to bet upon !"
The next day I left Plymouth very early in the
morninir. When I descended to the door, I found both
LIFE IN A COLONY, 45
Robins and Barkins there, and received a hearty and
cordial farewell fi-om both of tliem. The latter en-
treated me, if ever I came that way again, to favour
him with a visit, as he had some capital Jamaica forty
years old, and would be glad to instruct me in the
habits of fish and fishermen.
*' I will show you," he said, " how to make a shoal
of mackerel follow your vessel like a pack of dogs. I
can tell you how to make them rise from the bottom
of the sea in thousands, when common folks can't tell
there is one there, and then how to feed and coax
them away to the very spot you want to take them.
I will show you how to spear shad, and how .to strike
the fattest salmon that ever was, so that it will keep
to go to the East Indies ; and I'll larn you how to
smoke herrings without dryin' them hard, and tell
you the wood and the vegetables that give them the
highest flavour ; and even them cussed, dry, good-for-
nothing all-wives, Til teach you how to cure them so
you will say they are the most delicious fish you ever
tasted in all your life. I will, upon my soul ! And
now, before you go, I want you to do me a good turn,
lawyer. Just take this little silver flask, my friend,
to remember old John Barkins by, when he is dead
and gone, and when people in these parts shall say
when you inquire after him, that they don"'t know such
a man as old John Barkins no more. It is a beautiful
article. I found it in the pocket of a captain of a Spa-
nish privateer that boarded my vessel, and that I hit
46 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
over the head witli a handspike, so hard that ho never
knew what hurt him. It will just suit you, for it only
holds a thinible-full, and was made a purpose for fresh-
water fish, like Spaniards and lawyers. Good-by !
God bless you, sir ! A fair wind and a short passage
to you !"
I had hardly left the door, before I heard my name
shouted after me.
" Mr. Sandford! — lawyer! lawyer...."
It was old Barkins. I anticipated his object ; I
knew it was his old theme, —
" Lawyer, don't forget the catch, ' How many fins
has a cod, at a word V "
LIFE IN A COLONY. 47
CHAPTER III.
ASKING A GOVERNOR TO DINE.
The arrival of an English steamer at Halifax, and
the landing of a Governor-general for Canada, have
formed an all-engrossing topic of conversation during
the past week at Illinoo. In the winter season, when
but few vessels enter the port, and during the period
that intervenes between seed-time and harvest, when
the operations of agriculture are wholly suspended,
politics are ably and amply discussed, and very sapient
conjectures formed as to the future, in those interest-
ins; and valuable normal schools for statesmen — the
debating societies, taverns, blacksmiths'* shops, tap-
rooms, and the sunny and sheltered corners of the
streets. Every one, however humble his station may
be, is uncommonly well-informed on affairs of state.
A man who can scarcely patch the tattered breeches
of a patriot, can mend with great facility and neatness
a constitution, and he who exhibits great awkward-
ness in measuring a few yards of riband manifests
astonishing skill in handling the measures of a govern-
ment. Indeed, provincials have a natural turn for
46 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR.
political economy, as the (xermans and Italians have
for music ; and it is the principal source of amuse-
ment they possess.
If Lord John Russell were to spend an evenini; at
the puhlic room of the Exchange in this town, he
would find such topics as the corn-laws, free trade,
responsible government, and repeal of the union, dis-
posed of to his entire satisfaction, in a manner so lucid,
so logical and conclusive, that he could not fail to be
both astonished and edified. He would be convinced
that the Colonial Office should be removed from Down-
ing Street, London, to Shark Street, lilueberry Square,
Illinoo, where there are master minds capable of
directing, reconciling, and advancing the complicated
interests of a vast and populous empire. To such a
zealous statesman discussions of this kind would, no
doubt, be exceedingly interesting; but, as tliey are too
deep and difficult for my comprehension, I prefer listen-
ing to the graphic, though rather ascetic, " Sketches
of Life in a Colony," by my friend Barclay : —
Two such important and simultaneous arrivals, sir,
he said, as those of a steamer and a ijovernor, ahvavs
create "reat interest in this countrv — the one for won-
ders achieved, and the other tor wonders to be per-
formed. Indeed, they arc so identified one witii the
other, that the reception and farewell tiiey severally
receive are precisely simihir. The approach of both
is regarded with intense curiosity, and witnessed with
great anxiety by the whole population, on account of
LIFE IN A COLONY. 49
the novelties they are expected to bring with them ;
and both the great ship and the great man depart, so
noiselessly and so quietly, as not even to disturb the
dulness of that drowsy town Halifax, for, alas ! their
sojourn here is a tale that is told. The formal land-
ing and final embarkation of a Governor present such
a singular contrast, that they are well worth de-
scribing.
As soon as it is known that this high functionary
is on board, all the little world of Halifax rush with
impetuous haste, like a torrent, into Water Street,
and from thence through a narrow passage like an
arched tunnel, down an abrupt declivity, to a long,
narrow, dingy, and unsafe wharf, the extremity of
which is covered (with the exception of a footpath of
about nine feet wide) by a low miserable shed, that is
dignified with the name of the " Customs"' Ware-
house." The whole of the surface of this danfferous
place is crowded to excess, by a mixed and motleyed
multitude of black and white of both sexes — porters,
truckmen, and cabmen, vociferouslv demand or enforce
a passage, while those on the outer edge, pressed to
the extremity of the docks, utter loud screams of
terror from the impending danger of instant death by
drowning.
Amid such a confused and movino- throng it is not
easy to distinguish individuals, but any one acquainted
with the town can see that the heathen who worship
the rising sun are there, and the Pharisees, who
VOL. I. D
50 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
waiters on Providence, the restless and the discon-
tented, the liungry and needy place-hunters, and, above
all, the seekers for position — not a safe position on
the Quay, because, in such a crowd no place is safe —
but for an improved social position, whicli the coun-
tenance of the Governor is expected to confer. This
holiday is claimed and enjoyed by the people and
their leaders. There is no place allotted for persons
of another class, and, if there were, they would soon
be compelled to leave it by the intolerable " pressure
from without," Many an anxious face is now illu-
mined by expectations of better times ; for hope, like
the Scottish fir, takes root and flourishes in a cold and
sterile soil, that refuses nutriment to anything less
vivacious. Far above the heads of the gaping nmlti-
tude rises the huge Leviathan, the steamer, equally
crowded with the wharf with strange-looking people,
habited in still stranger-looking foreign costumes,
staring with listless indillerence at the idle curiosity
of the idle mob beneath. The descent from the deck,
which is effected by a few almost perpendicular planks,
without railing, hand-rope, or any security whatever,
like the descent to the grave, is common to all, from
the viceroy, with his gay and numerous staff", to the
stoker with his sooty and cumbrous .-sack of coals, who,
reversing the order of things, imparts more than he
receives.
The thunder of artillery from the citadel and the
flag-ship of the Admiral announce to the world the
LIFE IN A COLONY. 51
important event that the Governor has now landed ;
and the national anthem from the band of the guard
of honour, and the cheers of the free and enlightened
citizens of Halifax, are the first strains of welcome
that salute his ear. On his way to the palace he
stops for a few moments at the " Province Building,''
where, among the fashion, beauty, and gentry of the
town, and surrounded by the executive councillors, he
takes the usual oaths of office, and assumes the reins
of Government. Leo-islative and civic bodies now
present to him addresses, expressive of their heartfelt
gratitude to their most gracious Sovereign for having
selected, as a particular mark of favour to themselves,
such a distinguished man to rule over them, which
they cannot but attribute to their own unquenchable
and unquestionable loyalty, and to the kind and good
feeling they ever exhibited to his predecessors. They
do not forget to remind him that they have always
felt as affectionately as they have expressed them-
selves decorously towards every Governor of this pro-
vince, none of whom they have ever placed in a
position of difficulty, or deserted when they found him
so situated ; and conclude with an offer of their cordial
and strenuous support.
The Governor, on his part, a gentleman by birth
and education, is much affected with this flattering
reference to himself, and the kind and generous greet-
ing with which he has been received. He naturally
supposes that such respectable looking people mean
d2
52 Tin: c)[,n judge ; ok,
what they say; and as they have, with a tk'Hcac)
al)ovo all jiraise, made no mention of any difference of
opinion among themselves, he augurs well of his suc-
cess among a united population, whose leaders express
themselves so well and feel so warmly. Touched by
a behaviour that appeals directl}- to his heart, and
unwilling to be outdone in such magnanimous conduct,
he assures them that it will be his pleasure, as it is
his duty, to co-operate with tluin in any measure that
has for its object the benefit of the province; and that
they may confidently rely upon his untiring efforts to
develop the vast resources, both mineral and agricul-
tural, of this interesting and beautiful appendage of
the IJritish Empire.
As soon as these ceremonies are terminated, imme-
diate reference is made by some of his new and sincere
friends to the army list or peerage books for the pur-
pose of ascertaining his services or his pedigree, but
never, I am happy to say, for the credit of our popu-
lation, for discoverinsr some blot in his escutcheon, or
some failure in his conduct wherewith to vilify or
abuse him hereafter ; for such is the resource only of
low and iirnoble minds. But, alas ! colonial addresses
are commonly l»ut unmeaning compliments, and the
promises of support they contain are always accom-
panied by a mental reservation that a valuable equiva-
lent is to be rendered in return. As soon as he finds
it necessary to call for the fulfilment of this voluntary
enga"-ement, he finds to his astonishment that this
'&"o^
LIFE IN A COLONY. 53
harmonious and happy people are divided into two
parties, Conservatives and great Liberals. What that
term Conservatism means, I do not exactly know ;
and it is said that in England Sir Robert Peel is the
only man that does. But in a colony it would puzzle
that wily and cameleon-like politician even to conjec-
ture its signification. I take it, however, to be an
abandonment of all principle, and the substitution of
expediency in its place ; a relinquishment of any
political creed, and the adoption of a sliding-scale
whereby tenets rise or fall according to popular pulsa-
tion. Great Liberalism, on the other hand, is better
understood, for it is as ancient as a republic. It rests
in theory on universal suffrage and equal rights ; but
in practice exhibits the exclusion and tyranny of a
majority.
The real objects of these two amiable and attractive
parties are so well masked under high-sounding words
and specious professions, that the limited period of
gubernatorial rule is generally half expired before a
stranger understands them. When, at last, he at-
tempts to reconcile these conflicting factions, and to
form a mixed government, that shall combine all the
great interests of the country, the Conservatives in-
form him, in very moderate and temperate language,
and with nmch complacency, that they are both able
and willing to govern the province themselves, the
prosperity of which has been greatly advanced by their
sound and judicious policy. Thev admit that they
S-i THE OLD JLDGE; OR,
have confoiTod several important appointnient.s of late
upon their own relatives, but entreat him to believe
that afllnity never entered into their consideration; for,
as they are the best qualified themselves to form an
administration, so are their connexions the most suit-
able for public offices. At the same time, they pro-
claim their extreme anxietv to earn' out his views,
and promote the peace and harmony of the country ;
and, as a proof of the great sacrifice they are ■willing
to make, otter to him a resignation of one seat at the
council board, which is attended with great labour and
unaccompanied by any remuneration, and also one
legal appointment, to which the large salary of eighty
pounds sterling a-year is attached.
The Great Liberals, on the other h.and, with a vast
display of learning (for they have some distinguished
jurists among them), treat him to a long dissertation
on the Jh'itish Constitution, the principles of which
they have derived, Avith infinite industry and research,
from the notes of an American edition of " IMack-
stone'^s Commentaries," and inform liim that they are
ready to take office, if he will turn out all the present
incumbents for their benefit, or create an equal number
of situations (tf equivalent value, to support them
while thus engaged in their disinterested labours for
the public good. They frankly state to him tliat work
HMpiires food, that they are sturdy men and have a
orood appetite, and, moreover, tliat bread and honey
will not a])pea.se their hunger, lie therefore finds
LIFE IN A COLONY. 55
himself, to his amazement, in what the Americans
with some humour, but more elegance, call "'a con-
siderable fix."
But this is a painful subject, and I will not pursue
it, for I have nothing in common with either Conser-
vatism or Great Liberalism, which I believe to be mere
modifications of the same thin"-. I have done with
politics long since. When I did think or talk of them,
1 belonged to a party now nearly extinct in these
colonies — the good old Tory party, the best, the truest,
the most attached and loyal subjects her ]\Iajesty ever
had, or ever will have, in North America. There are
only a few of them now surviving, and they are old
and infirm men, with shattered constitutions and bro-
ken hearts. They have ceased to recruit, or even to
muster for several years ; for who would enlist in a
body that was doomed to inevitable martyrdom, amid
the indifference of their friends and the derision of
their enemies 1 Hunted and persecuted by rebels and
agitators, they were shamefully abandoned to their
cruel fate by those for whom they had fought and
bled, and whole hecatombs of them were at different
times offered up as a sacrifice to appease the sangui-
nary wrath of the infidel deities of sedition. Of late,
they have enjoyed comparative repose, for they have
neither influence nor numbers now to render them
objects of proscription or insult. Let us, however,
throw a mantle over these disgusting ulcers in the
body politic, and amuse ourselves by shooting Folly as
56 TUE OLD JUDGE; OR,
it flies. Let us pass over the intervening space of the
Governor''s rule. I liave described to you liis landing;
we will now proceed to the wharf again, witness his
embarkation for Iiis native land, and mark the agree-
able change.
The steamer has arrived from Boston en route for
England. She has no passengers for Halifax ; and a
few bagmen and a subaltern or two, whom nobody
knows, are the only persons to be taken on board. The
rabble are not there, the Governor''s patronage has been
small, and he has not been able to find offices for every
applicant. The naked have not all been clothed, and
many of the hungry have been sent empty awa3\ They
have seen him continually ; he is no longer a novelty ;
his day is past, his power is gone, and they have now
nothing to hope or receive from his bounty, and nothing
to fear or endure from his disapprobation. Groups of
gentlemen and ladies, gay carriages containing many a
familiar face, heads of departments, and the respect-
able part of the comnnniity (manj^ of whom are per-
sonal friends, and warndy attached to him), occupy
the wharf, which now appears to afford sufficient space
for the purpose. Instead of the noisy and vulgar
cheer with which he was received, the tremulous voice,
the starting tear, the silent but eloquent pressure of
the hand, convince him that, if he has not received all
the support that was so spontaneously and insincerely
oftVred to him, ho has secured more of affection and
regard than he could have expected in so sliort a time;
LIFE IN A COLONY. o7
and that his houest endeavours to benefit the country
have been duly appreciated by all those whose good
opinion is worth having.
Such is the usual course of events here ; but some-
times the same idle and turbulent crowd attend a
Governor at his embarkation that honoured his arrival,
and when that is the case, and they form his exclusive
escort, he has good grounds for self-examination, and
he may, with propriety, ask himself what he has done
to deserve such a deo-radation.
Considering a Governor, apart from his political
opinions, as the head of society at Halifax, it is
amusing to hear the inquiries and conjectures a8 to
the probable manner in which he will receive his
guests, or whether he will contract or enlarge the
circle of people to be admitted at the palace. There
is no little anxiety among the mammas, to know
whether he is married or single, and Avho the persons
are that compose his staff. The young ladies are not
less interested in ascertaining whether he is likely to
enliven the tedium of winter by giving balls, for, on
this important subject, the practice has not been uni-
form.
Tradition has preserved, and affection has che-
rished, the memory of dear old Governor Lawrance,
who lost his life in the service of the fair sex, by over-
exertion in attempting to fulfil a vow to dance with
every young lady in the room. For this voluntary
martyrdom, he has been very properly canonized, and
d5
58 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
.St. Lawrence is now universally cont-itlcred as the
patron saint of all Nova Scotia assemblies.
Among another class, there is an equally important
inquiry: \\'ill he dine out ? On this point also, as on
the other, there are many conflict ing precedents, from
Governor Parr, who preferred dining anywhere to
being at home, to his Excellency Governor /?n-par,
who, in my opinion, very properly dined nowhere but
at home. As the distributor of rank and patronage,
and the arbiter of fashion, the course to be adopted
bv one who is to adjninister the affairs of the country
for five years is a matter of great importance to people
who are desirous of acquiring a position in society;
for, until recently, any person whom a Governor coun-
tenanced by accepting his invitation, became thereby
a sort of honorary member of the higher class.
My attention was first directed to this peculiarity
many years ago, in tho time of Sir Hercules Sampson.
A merchant of the name of Channing, who had begun
life with a small property, which, by great industry,
and a long course of upright and honourable dealing,
he had increased into a large fortune, was very anxious
that the Governor should impress the Tower mark of
his approbation upon himself and his silver by dining
with him. He had looked forward to this period with
much anxiety for many years, and had built a large
and commodious house, which ho filled with rich and
expensive furniture. Upon the arrival of Sir Her-
cules, he waited upon him with slow and liositating
LIFE IN A COLONY. 59
steps, and, according to the usual etiquette, solicited
the honour of his dining with him, and naming a time
for that purpose. The Governor, who was a conside-
rate, kind-hearted, affable old man, readily acceded to
his wishes, and proposed that day week for conferring
happiness upon him.
Channing returned, with a lighter heart and quicker
pace, to communicate the overpowering news to his
agitated wife. They were an affectionate and domestic
couple, and had always lived in perfect seclusion.
Great were the fears and many the conferences that
preceded this eventful day. Poor Mrs. Channing was
lost in a sea of doubts and perplexities. None of her
acquaintances were better instructed on these matters
than herself, for they were all in the same class of life,
and equally ignorant of what she desired to be in-
formed ; wheu, by great good fortune, she discovered
an able counsellor and valuable assistant, well versed
in all the forms and usages of the royal party, in the
butler of a former viceroy.
It was an anxious and trying week, and the longest,
in her apprehension, she had ever passed ; but weeks
and months, as well as years, come to an end at last,
and the long-expected and dreaded day had now
arrived. Chairs were uncovered, curtains unfolded,
grates polished, and all the finery and bijouterie of
the house displayed to the greatest advantage. Every
contingency had been provided for; every order given.
repeated, and reiterated, and her own toilet completed ;
60 • THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
when, fatigued, exhausted, and alarmed, she descended
to the drawing-room, and awaited with her husband
the awful announcement of her distin^ruished ijueats.
The hands of the clock appeared to be stationary. It
was evidently going, but they did not seem to advance.
The arrival of myself and several others, at the same
time, was a great relief to her mind, as it diverted
her thouirhts from her harassing anxieties. At last,
heavy and long-continued knocks, like the rub-a-dub-
of a drum, that made the side of the house vibrate,
announced the approach of the Government-house
party.
In those days the magnetic telegraph of the door-
bell had not been introduced into the country, and it
is subject of great regret to all reflecting minds that
it ever has been imported. It is one of those refine-
ments that have debilitated the tone of our nerves,
and, by depriving them of exercise, rendered them so
delicate, that they are excited and shocked by the
least noise. Nor is the language it speaks by any
means so intelligible as that which is uttered by that
polished, deep-toned, ornamental appendage of the
hall-door, the jrood old brass knocker. At the same
time that that intelligent watchman gave notice of an
application for admission, it designated the quality
and sometimes the errand of the visitor, A timid,
sinMe beat bespoke the beggar, whose impatience was
very humanely allowed to cool while he was studying
tlic form of his petition. A stout, bold, single blow
LIFE IN A COLONY. • 61
announced a footman, who was immediately admitted
for the nmtual privilege of an interesting gossip. An
awkward, feeble double knock was proof positive that
a poor relation or shabby acquaintance was there ; and
a slow and reluctant attendance operated as a useful
hint to wear better clothes, or carry a heavier purse
in future. But there was no mistaking the sledge-
hammer blows that made the door tremble for its
panels, as it did at present. They had a voice of
authority, a sort of bear-a-hand command, as sailors
call it ; their tones were those of fashion, rank, and
dio-nity. They were well understood, from the mis-
tress, who fidgeted uneasily on the sofa in the drawing-
room, to the lady's-maid, who flew from the servants'
snuggery with the lightness and fleetness of a fairy to
receive the Governor's lady and daughter, and ascer-
tain with her own eyes whether these divinities were
decorated with ermine and diamonds, or only cat and
paste, as she had heard it whispered, with a con-
temptuous sneer, by her confidant at the Admiralty-
house.
At last, the door flew open with such impatient
haste as nearly to demolish a gouty foot that had pro-
truded itself with careless ease within its fearful reach,
and the servant announced Sir Hercules and Lady
Sampson, Miss Sampson, Lord Edward Dummkopf
and the Honourable Mr. Trotz (the two aides-de-
camp), and Captain Howard (the military secretary).
It was a large and formidable party from one house ;
62 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
aiul the clatter of swords, and jingle of spurs, and the
glitter of gold lace and epaulettes, and the glare of
scarlet cloth and blaze of jewellery, was quite over-
powering to the timid and unaccustomed senses of
poor Mrs. Channing.
The Governor was a tall, gaunt, iron-framed man,
with an erect and military bearing, that appeared to
increase a stature naturally disproportioned. His head
was bald ; the hand of Time, or of the Philistine
woman his wife, having removed his hair, which gave
a more striking appearance to an enormous nose that
disfigured a face which would otherwise have been
called handsome. His manner was kind without con-
descension, and his conversation agreeable without
humbug. Lady Sampson, had she not inherited a
large fortune, might have been supposed to have been
selected by her husband on that principle that so
many men appear to make choice of their wives,
namely, for being the very opposite of what they are
themselves. She was a short, but uncommonly stout
person — unwieldy, perhaps, would be a more appro-
priate term, and very vulgar. Her dress was a curi-
ous and rather complicated mass of striking contrasts,
which, notwithstanding her size, awakened the idea of
an enormous salmon-fly. " Kich and rare were the
gems she wore," and from their dimensions, iu excel-
lent keeping with the circumference of her huge arms
and neck. Her charms had been duly appreciated by
her discerning husband when on duty with his regi-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 63
ment at Birmingham; and her heart was besieged
with such mihtary skill and ardour, that she soon
surrendered herself and her treasure at discretion to
the conquering hero.
Miss Sampson was an only child. Her glass, and
the admiration of her friends, convinced her she was
handsome ; her mother had informed her of her large
fortune, and she saw the station, and knew the high
reputation of her father. Unlike him, she was well
proportioned ; and, unlike her mother, she was
graceful. Her complexion, which once boasted of the
pure red and white of England, had slightly suftered
from the climate of the West Indies ; the colour, like
that of a portrait of Sir Joshua Reynolds, being some-
what impaired. Young and beautiful, it is not to be
wondered at if she exhibited a little of the pride and
haughtiness of a belle. She lisped a little, either
naturally or aftectedly, and " danthed only with her
own thett," or with a few officers of good family be-
longing to the " thixty-thixth" regiment, whom she
condescended to honour with her hand. Still, though
she talked more, perhaps, than was agreeable to colo-
nial ears of her " own thett," it was evident she con-
sidered herself among them, but not of them ; for,
notwithstanding the rank of the gentlemen on her
father"'s staff was superior to his own, which was
merely local, she would sometimes speak of the aides
with a slight curl of her pretty lip as "our daily bread."
Lord Edward Dummkopf was decidedly the hand-
Gt THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
soiiicst man in lliilii'ax; which, considering that it
contains a rcniarkalily good-hx)king popuhition of
25,000 inhahitants, throe regiments, and the olli-
cers of several men-of-war, is bestowing no small
praise upon him. He was tall, rather slight,
graceful, remarkably well got up, and had an air
of fashion and elegance about him, which is alone
acquired in that high and polished society of which
lie was such a distiniruished member. He had a
beautiful head of hair, the value of which was evi-
dently well appreciated by the care bestowed upon it ;
also a moustache and an imperial of the most approved
form and unexceptionable colour. His pale complexion
gave the idea of a poetical turn of mind. His fore-
head was high, though rather narrow, and slightly
receding ; the oval of his face was well defined, but
the centre was somewhat concave, which, to a critic,
perhaps, would suggest the idea of the inside of a
spoon. It did not, however, to a casual observer, im-
pair its general beauty, which was illuminated by eyes
so bright as to glisten, and ornamented with teeth of
unrivalled whiteness. AV'ith respect to his talents, a
physiognomist could bo at no loss ; for it waa evident
that the brilliancy of his eyes arose from their peculiar
texture, and not from that which usually produces
animation. But this secret was well concealed from
the world by his great reserve, for he was seldom
heard to utter anything beyond " How very good !" a
remark which every occurrence elicited. In one respect.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 65
he evinced a little humour, by adding the syllable
" bus" to words— as dogibus, horsibus, and catibus.
So distinguished a man could not fail to have imita-
tors ; and many a pretty young lady was heard to
speak of her pin-a-bus, thread-a-bus, and book-a-bus,
as Lord Edward says. Take him altogether, he was
without a rival for personal appearance, if we except
the exquisite drum-major of the before-named "thixty-
thixth" regiment, who divided the empire of hearts
with the aristocratic lieutenant ; the one leading cap-
tive the mammas and their daughters, and the other
their maids. On entering the room, he bowed conde-
scendingly, though somewhat formally, to ]\Irs. Chan-
ning ; the inclination of the body being from the hip-
joint like that of a wooden doll.
The Hon. ISIr, Trotz, on the contrary, was more
distinguished for a form that exhibited a singular com-
pound of strength and activity. He was the heau
ideal of a light infantryman. He was the boldest rider,
the best swimmer, the most expert pugilist and swords-
man, an irresistible billiard-player, and the best shot
in the garrison. His habits were temperate, which,
with continued and systematic exercise, enabled him to
be always ready, or on hand, as he called it, for any-
thing. He was a good economist, and understood how
to make the most of the small allowance of a younger
son. He sported the best-appointed tandem of any
man in the place, which he kept jointly with another
ofRcer, who paid more than his share of the expenses,
66 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
in consideration of bciuc: relieved from the trouble of
usinij it. He had also a beautiful and very fast yacht,
which he sustained upon the same friendly and equi-
table terms. The Governor, perhaps, was not aware
how admirably well calculated he was to aid him in
conciliating the aftections of the people; for, in his
absence, he was very fond of informing: colouists, for
whom he liad a profound contempt, how much he was
interested in the Negroes and Indians of Nova Scotia,
who alone could boast of purity of blood, and were the
only gentlemen in it. He would inquire, with an in-
nocent air, when the province first ceased to be a penal
colony; and, when informed it had never been one,
would aftect great surprise, as he thought he could
trace the debasing effects of the system in the habits
and morals of the people. He was indignant at the local
rank of Honourable being conceded to people filling
certain public offices, whom he called honourable carri-
boos; and requested that that prefix might be omitted
in any written comnmnication to him, lest he might
be supposed to belong to such an ignoble herd, ^^'hen
he entered the room, he was evidently suffering from
cold, for he proceeded directly to the fire, turned his
back to it, and put his hands behind him to warm them.
It was an advantageous position, as it enabled him to
take a cool and leisurely survey of the company, and
to be seen to advantage himself.
Captain Howard, the military secretary, was a phi-
lanthropist, and a pious and zealous member of the Low
LIFE IN A COLONY. 67
Church party. He was a distributor of tracts, and talked
very eloquently and learnedly of such books as " The
Drunkard's Grave," " The Sinner Saved," " The Peni-
tent Thief," " Prodigal Son," and " The Last Dying
Confessions of a Convict." He was a great enemy to
private balls and amusements, and to public assemblies
and theatres. The only pleasures to which he was in-
dulgent were the pleasures of the table, being a capital
judge of wine, of which he drank freely. He abhorred
beggars, whom he threatened to send to Bridewell, and
orthodox clergymen, whom he devoted to a worse place.
He disapproved of indiscriminate charity as encourag-
ing idleness, and preferred seeking out objects for his
benevolence to their obtruding themselves ; as it ena-
bled him, when he gave a sixpence, to accompany it
with that which was far more valuable, a long lecture.
Some of the party, following the example of his
Excellency, now took their seats ; but the Governor,
who had sat down on a small ottoman near Mrs.Chan-
ning, was restless and uneasy. At first, he drew him-
self a little further forward, and then removed as far
back as possible ; and, finally, rose up and turned to
ascertain the cause of the inconvenience he had expe-
rienced. He immediatelv exclaimed —
" Good God, I have killed this cat ! AVas there
ever anything so awkward or so shocking V
• Mrs. Channing said the cat was only worsted.
" Pardon me," he answered ; " I wish with all my
heart it was only worsted, for then there would be
G8 TilE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
some hope of its recovery ; but it is as dead as Julius
Caesar !"
" I raised it myself, Sir Hercules !" she continued ;
"and...."
" Oh, if you raised it yourself, madam, it must have
been a pet!" he replied ; " and so much the worse for
me. I beg ten thousand pardons ! It is quite dread-
ful!"
Mrs. Channing explained again — " It is only a bad
piece of work, your Excellency, and 1...."
" A very bad piece of work, indeed !" said the in-
consolable offender. " IJut the truth is, my eyes have
never recovered the injury they received in Egypt."
" It will rise again, I assure you, Sir Hercules ! A
good shake...."
" Never ! never, my dear madam !" he persisted.
" Cat though it be, if it had fifty lives instead of nine,
it will never rise again !"
Here Lady Sampson came to the rescue. Taking
an enormous eye-glass set with brilliants out of her
bosom, she examined the defunct cat, and pronounced
it a most beautiful piece of rug-work ; and, on a nearer
inspection, exclaimed —
" But where did you get those beautiful eyes of
yours, my dear Mrs. Channiiig ? and those bright and
sharp claws? They are the most magnificent I ever
saw! I used to think my eyes and claws perfection,
but they are not to be compared to yours ! Where in
the worM <lid you jjet them ?"
LIFE IN A COLONY. 69
" At Storr and Mortimer''s," replied the delighted
hostess, who had spent so much time and valuable
materials in this valuable employment.
Lady Sampson was an enthusiast in the art, and
pressed her friend to accept a pattern of a real Angola
cat, which she would send her in the morning. It had,
she said, a splendid tail, like that of a spaniel dog ;
and a bushy tail was, in her opinion, one of the most
beautiful things in the world. She then asked a lady
who sat near her if she was fond of rug-work ; but she
said she was sorry to confess her ignorance or awkward-
ness, for she had never raised but one cat, and that
she had killed in shaving.
" How very good I" said Lord Edward ; " only
think of shaving a little catibus !"
But Trotz, who never lost an opportunity of being
impertinent, asked her if it was the custom in this
country to shave cats ; and observed that it would be
a capital employment for the young monkeys of the
town, whom he had seen grimacing a few evenings ago
at a public assembly at the Masons' Hall. Lady
Sampson, whose perceptions were none of the quickest,
very gravely explained to him that shaving a cat was
a term of art, and meant the close and uniform shearinsf
of the irregular and protruding ends of the worsted.
The door now opened, and several persons (not ne-
cessary to enumerate or describe) were announced,
amonfj whom were the Bishop of the Isle of Sable,
recently arrived from England on his way to his diocese^
70 TIIF, OM) JIDGE; OR,
and Colonel Percy, of the "tliixty-tliixtli," There was
nothing remarkable about the former. One bishop is
very like another bishop. Their dress is similar, and
their conversation generally embraces the same topics.
You hear a little too much of what they are pleased to
call church architecture, though why I could never
quite understand ; and you are somewhat fatigued with
prosy dissertations on towers, spires, transepts, galle-
ries, and buttresses. This, however, is a matter of taste,
and they have as good a right to select " church archi-
tecture" for their hobb}^ as a sportsman has his dog
and his gun. He was, however, a new one ; and it is
singular that these novi episcopi bear a still more
strikiuir resemblance to each other than the senior class
do. Besides the never-ending topic just mentioned,
which they have in common with all their brethren,
they have a great deal to say about themselves — a
subject no less interesting than the other. New dignity,
like a new coat, is awkward and inconvenient. It is
stiff and formal, and has not " a natural set." Time
takes off the vulirar ijloss of both, and directs your
attention from things that annoy yourself, and are apt
to excite remark in others. They have also (I mean,
colonial bishops) one grand object in view from tlie
moment of their landing in a colony ; and that is, the
erection of a cathedral so large as to contain all the
churchmen of the province, and so expensive as to
exhaust all the liberality of their friends ; and this
unfinished monument of ill-directed zeal they are sure
LIFE IN A COLONY. 71
to place in a situation where it can be of no use
whatever.
His Lordship, Job Sable Island, as usual, had his
model, his plans, and his subscription-list ; and, as
usual, thouoh warned that no suitable foundation for
such a massive structure could be found on that enor-
mous accumulation of sand, was determined to persevere
and exhibit another melancholy instance of failure, to
warn the Christian public how careful they should be
into whose hands they entrust their donations.
This, as I have said, was a characteristic of his
order ; but there was one peculiarity that concerned
himself as a man, and entitled him to my warmest
sympathy. He had no doubt supposed, when he left
his native land, that all he would have to do in his
diocese would be to discharge the ordinary episcopal
duties, onerous as they might be, and responsible as
they undoubtedly are, but that there his labours
would end. To his astonishment, however, he had
not been ten days in Halifax before he found that he
would have everything to do. He discovered that
colonists, although natives of the country, and accus-
tomed to its climate, knew nothing of either. They
knew not how to build houses, or to warm or ventilate
them, to cultivate their fields, clear the forest, or even
how to manaofe their o^vn affairs. With a zeal that
did his head and heart great honour, he resolved not
to content himself with merely showing his people the
road to Heaven, but also how to make, use, and enjoy
72 THE OLD Jll)(;i:; OR,
roads on earth, while permitted to remain there. But
there was one consolation to be drawn from his mis-
fortunes, and that was, that time would lessen his
labours ; for he who attempts to teach another that
which he does not know himself, cannot fail to acquire
some information in his endeavours to advance his
pupil. ^
Colonel Percy, of the " thixty-thixth," just men-
tioned, was one of the most delightful men I ever met ;
' A bishop for any of the North American provinces should
in all cases be selected from the colonial clergy, most of whom
are natives, and all of whom arc well educated ; while the great
majority, I am happy to say, are not only scholars and gentle-
men, but pious, laborious, and most exemjjlary men. These
persons, from their thorough knowledge of the state of the
country ; the habits, feelings, prejudices, and means of the
people ; the peculiar relation subsisting between the rector and
his parishioners, and the Church and Dissenters in this part of
the world ; the extent to which episcopal authority ought to,
or can be pushed with safety ; and many other things of no
less importance, are infinitely better qualified than any English
clergyman can possibly be (for this information can only be
acquired from long experience, and, after a certain periotl of
life, is very difficult to be attained at all). In other respects,
to say the least, they are quite equal to the episcopal specimens
we have been honoured with. I am quite aware that, in high
quarters, where a better feeling should exist, and wiiere it is
most important they should be better informed, it is heresy to
say colonial clergymen are not only qualified, but they are the
most suitable persons to fill the higher offices of their profes-
sion in their own country ; but magna est Veritas.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 7o
clieerfiil, humorous, filled with anecdote, well-informed
and well-bred, he was, in reality, what Miss Sampson
called him, a " hotht in himthelf."
The guests having now all arrived with the excep-
tion of Captain Jones of the Navy, Channing was in
great perplexity about ordering dinner. He would
like to wait for the gallant captain, but the Governor
was remarkable for his punctuality. What was to be
done ? He argued it over in his mind, for he never
did anything without a sufficient reason. Jones was
notoriously the most absent man in the service. He
was as likely to forget his invitation as to remember
it, and was sure to make some blunder about the hour;
and time, tide, and Governors wait for no man.
The dinner was ordered ; and, when the folding-
doors were opened, Channing, with a palpitating heart,
offered his arm to Lady Sampson, and conducted her
to her place, while his Excellency honoured his better
half in a similar manner. It was a moment of pride
and pleasure to them both. They had attained a long-
cherished object of ambition. They had " asked a
Governor to dine," and had thereby taken another
and higher step in life. They were now people of " a
certain position." Channing asked the bishop to say
grace, but he had repeated that formulary so often for
" the squire" in Kent, when rector, that, now he was a
lord of a manor himself, he was unwilling to perform
the duty any longer, and bowed (or rather nodded,
for there is more palpable meaning in a nod than a
VOL. I. E
74 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
bow) to Lis chaplain, who was but too happy to gratify
his excellent friend and patron.
The soup was capital, conversation became general,
and everything seemed to be going on remarkably
well ; but the hostess was dying with apprehension,
for a critical part of the entertainment had arrived,
the thouirhts of which had filled her with terror diirinor
the whole day.
At the period I am speaking of, no person could
venture to give a large dinner-party at Halifax (such
was the unskilfuluess of servants) without the assist-
ance of a professional cook, a black woman, whose
attendance it was necessary to secure before issuing
cards of invitation. Channinij had not forfjotten to
take this wise precaution ; but the artiste had pre-
pared some side-dishes, of which, though she knew the
component parts, she did not know the name. By the
aid of a Housewife & Manuel, Mrs. Clianning judged
them to be " Cotelettes a I'ltaliennc," " Chartreuse
d'un Salpi^'on de Volaille," " Boudins a la Richelieu,"
" Quenelles de Vulaille," " Croquets," &c. &c. ; but
she was uncertain. They were too difficult to remem-
ber ; and, if remembered, unpronounceable. She was
afraid of huvin<; her knowlediie tested and her iirno-
ranee exposed by Trotz, wlio was noted for hi.s mali-
cious impertinence. Fortune, however, favoured her,
and she owed her escape to the tact of a servant, wlio
found liimself in a situation of similar difficulty. The
first of these mysterious dishes that he presented to
LIFE IN A COLONY. 7o
the troublesome aide, called forth the dreaded inquiry,
" What is the name of it V Equally ignorant with
the rest of the household, he affected not to hear the
question, withdrew the dish, passed on to the next
person, and never offered him another until he found
one he knew by name as well as by sight. The crisis
was now passed, the lady's fever instantly subsided,
and she breathed freer. At the mention of moose-
meat, Lord Edward, to the astonishment of every-
body, commenced a conversation himself, a thing al-
most unknown before. He asked the young lady who
had amused him so much by saying she had killed a
cat in shaving, what the plural of moose was.
" Mice," she replied, with great readiness.
" Miceibus !" he repeated. " How very good !"
and relapsed again into his usual taciturnity.
The two favourite wines at Halifax at that period
were champagne at, and Madeira after, dinner. Trotz
therefore, of course, voted them both vulgar, called
them kitchen wines, and, when pressed by the host to
take a glass with him, and asked which he would
take, —
*' Anything Mit champagne, sir," he said.
Channing was shocked ; he had imported it himself,
he had spared no expense, was a good judge of its
quality and flavour, and he could not understand how
it could be rejected with such evident disgust. He
prudently asked no questions, but smiled, bowed, and
talked to some one else.
e2
76 THE OLD JL DOE ; OR,
Miss Sampson observed to the bishop that Trotz
was like a " thithle, he thcrathed tho thockingly !"
Which was honoured with the usual remark from
another person, " How very good !"
Captain Jones now made his appearance, and a very
odd one it certainly was. He was one of the most
eccentric men in the navy. In roughness of manner
and disregard of dress, he was of the old Eenbow
school ; in practical skill and science he was at the
head of the modern one. He was so dreadfully absent
that he unintentionally said and did the most awkward
things imaginable ; and the only redeeming point in
his absurd behaviour was, that it was entirely free
from affectation. He was dressed in an old shabby
frock-coat with a pair of tarnished epaulettes, his
hands bore testimony to their familiarity with the
ri2;2;infr, and he had not sul)mitted himself to a barber
for two days, at least. He took his seat near me, and
then for the first time appeared to be conscious that
he was late for dinner ; but he applied himself withcjut
loss of time to remedy the defect. The arrival of such
a man in such an attire naturally occasioned a pause,
by attracting everybody's attention to him.
" Pray," said Trotz (who sat nearly opposite to us)
to his neighbour, but loud enouirh to be distinctly
lieard, " who is that ohl quiz? Is he a colonist T""
" Captain Jones, of H.M. ship Thunderer, sir ; very
much at your service !" said the sailor, with a very
unmistakable air and tone.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 77
Trotz quailed. It was evident that, though a good
shot, he preferred a target to au antagonist, and
wanted bottom. True courage is too noble a quality
to be associated with swaggering and insolent airs.
" How very good !" said Lord Edward.
" Very," said the charming Colonel ; " very good,
indeed ! He may be an oddity, but he is a fine manly
old fellow ; and your friend had better be cautious how
he wakes up that sleeping lion."
The Captain ate heartily, though rather incon-
veniently slow, which protracted the removals, and
kept us all waiting. It was a matter of business, and
he performed it in silence. Once, however, he looked
up, complained there was a draught in the room, and,
drawing a soiled black silk cap with a long pendent
tassel from his pocket, put it on his head, and resumed
his employment. Although Mrs. Channing was un-
acquainted with the names of many of her dishes,
there was one she rather prided herself upon — a pud-
ding, which, when the Governor declined, she pressed
upon his attention, saying, that she had made it her-
self. This was too good an opportunity for Trotz to
pass unnoticed ; he, therefore, begged Miss Sampson
to partake of it, as the hostess had made it with her
own hands : laying an emphasis on the latter words,
which produced, as he intended, an involuntary smile.
Channing saw and winced under the ridicule, although
he was unable to discover whether it was excited by
the pudding or his wife. To make matters worse,
/8 THE OLD .ILDGE; OU,
Captain Jones, whose appetite was now satisfied, and
who had only heard the word pudding, to whidi he
had just been helped, added to their mortification by
one of his blundering remarks. He said that it was
capital, and that he had never tasted but one like it
before, and that was in Mexico.
" 1 went there," he said, " with the Admiral, to
settle some little difterence we had with the govern-
ment of that country, and the President asked us to
dine with him. What makes me recollect the pud-
ding is his wife made it herself. He had two beauti-
ful dauijliters : one about ei<rhtecn, and the other
twenty years of age, who were covered with jewels of
a size, brilliancy, and value far beyond anything I
ever saw in Europe. I asked him where madam his
wife was. ' To tell the truth,'' ho replied, 'she is in
the kitchen superintending the cookery for the din-
ner.^"
The Governor, with his usual tact and good-nature,
turned the conversation to another topic. He adverted
to his recent government in the West Indies, and was
speaking of some very unreasonable request of the
people, the refusal of which had made him very un-
popular at the tinii'. Jones, with his customary in-
tention, thought he was speaking of some one else, and
said : —
" Your friend was a devilish lucky fellow, then,
that they did not serve him as I once saw the Chinese
punish one of their gods. They had been praying to
LIFE IN A COLONY. 79
him for rain for thirty days, and at the end of that
period, seeing no appearance of a shower, they sent
three of their mandarins to him and gave him a sound
drubbing. Indeed it is a wonder that they did not
Lynch him, as they did the Governor of Antigua in
1710. Colonel Park having rendered himself ex-
tremely obnoxious, the whole white population re-
belled, and, besieging his house, put him to death,
and killed and wounded thirty-six people whom he
had assembled for his defence."^
" How very good I" said Lord Edward.
Jones, to whom this remark had been several times
applied, was somewhat in doubt as to its equivocal
meaning. He had already repressed the insolence of
one aide-de-camp, and was quite prepared to avenge
that of the other.
"Grad, sir," he replied, "you would not have
thought it is so very good if you had been there, I
can tell you, for they hung his staff also !"
1 The Governor, Ensign Lyndon, and thirteen or fourteen
soldiers, were killed on this occasion; and Captain Newel,
Lieutenant Worthington, and twenty-six soldiers, wounded;
besides a number of the Governor's friends, who were dread-
fully beaten and bruised. On the part of the assailants, Cap-
tain Piggot and thirty-two persons were killed or wounded.
In the thirty-sixth volume of the "Universal History" (part
INIodern), page 276, a full account is given of this atrocious
affair ; it is also to be found in Bryant Edwards's " History of
the West Indies." Not the least extraordinary part is, that no
one was punished for it.
80 THE OLD JinoK; or,
Then turning to me, ho said, in an under tone, —
" Who is tliat gentleman opposite, who did me the
lionour to call me an old (|uiz, ihr I intend to have
the pleasure of making his acquaintance to-morrow V
" T-r-o-t-z," I said, spelling his name, so that the
familiar sound might not strike his ear.
" Trotz ! Trotz !" he slowly repeated ; " does he
enjoy the title of honourable ?"
On my answering in the affirmative, he remarked, —
" I know him ! he is a son of that old scoundrel,
Lord Shoreditch, who sold his party and his reputa-
tion for a peerage, and the contempt of all mankind !
The reptile is beneath my notice !"
Here there was a pause. To use the expressive
language of the country, there was a thaw ; the
sleighing had gone, and we had stuck in the mud,
when an old servant of Channing's entered the dining-
room, and, holding the door in his hand, either con-
founded at the sight of such an unusual party, or
waiting to catch the eye of his mistress, hesitated
awhile, and then said, in a loud voice : —
" Bears has no tails, ma'am !" and very deliberately
retired.
There was somethiiifj so comical in this unconnected
and apparently useless piece of information that laugh-
ter was irresistible. As soon as any one could be
heard, Mrs. Channing, with more coolness and self-
possession than I had given her credit for, explained
that as all sleighs were covered with furs, and of late
LIFE IN A COLONY. 81
decorated with the tails of foxes and other animals,
she had thought in her simplicity that bears' tails
would admirably contrast with the grey wolf-skins
with which her sleigh was clothed, and for that pur-
pose had sent the groom for a furrier to procure some,
which caused this communication that " bears has no
tails." Having extricated herself so well from this
awkward affair, she rose and retired, accompanied by
Lady Sampson and the rest of the fair sex. As soon
as we had resumed our seats, the Governor started as
a topic of conversation the great improvement that
had taken place of late years in the soldier's dress.
He spoke of the inconvenient practice of using soap
and flour on the hair ; of their absurd and useless
queues ; of their troublesome breeches and long gai-
ters, the care of which occupied the time and destroyed
the comfort of the men, all which he illustrated by
amusino; anecdotes of the olden time.
" I quite agree with you, sir," said Captain Jones ;
" but there is great room for improvement yet, espe-
cially in the dress of the medical men of the army.
What a monstrous absurdity it is to put these people
in the uniform of soldiers, who have no fighting what-
ever to do, and whose arms and accoutrements are
emblems of a service they never perform ! If it is
necessary for the sake of appearance that they should
be habited hke other officers, I would make their dress
subservient to the objects of their profession. For
instance, I would have the gold band that goes down
E 5
82 THE OLD JUD(iE; OR,
the seam of their trousers to bo gilt strips of diachylon
plaster ; their spurs should contaiu lancets ; their
scabbard a case of instruments instead of a sword, the
handle of which should be a pliable syringe. I would
give them a sabertash, and fill it with splints and
bandages ; their sword-belt should be so constructed
as to be made useful as a tourniquet, and their sash as
a sling for a wounded arm. They might also have a
cartouche-box, filled with opiates, pills, and styptics ;
while the cushion of the epaulette might be composed
of blisters and strengthening plasters. They would
then be always ready for immediate service, and would
be provided on the spot for every emergency. I can-
not conceive anything more perfect than this arrange-
ment. With his library in his head, and his dispensary
in liis clothes, what more efficient man would there be
in the service than a military surgeon?"
This very droll suggestion put every one in good
humour, and was followed by some capital stories from
the Colonel ; until the Governor having passed the
wine (for he was the first that curtailed the period spent
over the bottle), Channing proposed that we should
join the ladies in the drawing-room. The dinner had
been a good one, though rather too abundant ; and tlie
cook had introduced some dishes of her own that were
new to the Crovernment House party, and occasioned
remarks that annoyed poor Channing excessively.
A mono: these was one containinir a number of small
baked pears, the long and slender stalks of which were
LIFE IN A COLONY. 83
bent backward and extended the whole length of the
fruit. Lord Edward had asked permission to help Miss
Sampson to one of these baked mice, as he called them,
to which they certainly bore a very striking resem-
blance.
" Mithibus! Oh ! you! thocking! quithe!" was her
reply.
Notwithstanding this and other mortifications that
he had endured, Channing was, on the whole, elated
and pleased. He knew that a man who steps out of
his proper sphere in life must inevitably provoke ridi-
cule, and although good breeding may suppress it in
his presence, it cannot fail to find vent at his expense
aftei*wards. He remained behind in the dining-room
a few minutes. His property had been acquired by
care and economy, and could only be preserved by the
same means. He was now enabled to be liberal, but
liberality does not necessarily include extravagance ;
he therefore locked up the wine and the dessert, and
then followed his guests into the drawing-room.
Here the attention of the company was engrossed
by a beautiful and precocious little boy, the child of
his eldest daughter, who was then living at Bermuda
with her husband. The moment he saw his grand-
father (which word he had abbreviated into Danny),
he ran up to him, and claimed the reward of his good
behaviour. It was evident he had been drilled and
bribed into silence upon the subject of the defect in the
face of Sir Hercules, for he said —
84 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
" Danny, give me the orange you promised me, for
I did not say the Governor had a great big nose."
Even the terror of his relatives and the politeness
of the company were overcome by the absurdity of this
remark. Every one laughed, and among the rest none
more heartily and good-naturedly than his excellency
himself.
" Come here, my little man," he said ; " it is a very
big nose, a very big nose, indeed : but it has had too
many jokes cracked upon it not to be able to bear
another from such a pretty little boy as you."
As the Governor advanced the little fellow receded,
until his progress was stopped by the comer of the
room. His terror now became insupportable, and he
called to his grandfather for assistance.
" Kick him, Danny !" shouted the child. " Throw a
stone at him, Danny ! Make the dog bite him, Danny !"
He then threw himself on the floor, and kicked, and
screamed most furiously, until he was canned out of
the room by the nurse.
" How very good !" said Lord Edward.
" Capital, by Jove !" said Trotz.
]5ut Miss Sampson, knowing the unfortunate cause of
it all, thouirht " it wath thockino;."
Lady Sampson, who prided herself upon her sing-
ing (as every one does upon wliat they cannot do),
was now induced to take a seat at the piano and favour
the company with a song, which she executed, if not
to the delight of all present (for her voice was very
LIFE IN A COLONY. 85
false), at least to her own entire satisfaction. I have often
observed, that most people, however pleased they may be
with themselves and their own personal appearance, pre-
fer to sing of beings and characters wholly different. A
pale, consumptive, diminutive-looking little man, de-
lights in the loud and rough song of a sailor or pirate,
that speaks of thunder, and forked lightning, and moun-
tain waves. A grenadier-soi-t of person idolizes little
Cupid, and wishes to be thought to resemble him. If
asked for a song, he begins —
I'm the Cupid of flowers —
A merry light thing ;
I'm lord of these bowers,
And rule like a king.
There is not a leaf
Ever thrilled with the smart
Of Love's pleasant grief,
But was shot through the heart.
By me — by me — little mischievous sprite,
Kindling a love-match is all my delight.
Stout and well-developed women warble of elfs,
sylphs, and beings of aerial lightness.
The Grovernor''s lady, under the influence of this in-
scrutable law, sang —
Thine ear I will enchant,
Or, like a, fairy., trip upon the green —
and one or two others of a like nature, and was loudly
applauded ; for a little gubernatorial circle at Halifax
has its courtiers and parasites as well as that of the
Tuileries or Buckingham Palace. After this magni-
86 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
ficcnt display of taste aud talent, Miss Sampson fol-
lowed the iri*cat ouchantrcss. She would have liked
to have sun<^ Italian, as most young ladies do who
neither understand the language nor know the pronun-
ciation, for they very properly imagine they can give
a greater effect to it on that account, and, besides, there
is something beautifully mystical in the strains of an
unknown tongue ; but Lord Edward was a judge of
music, and always applauded her singing : she there-
fore appealed to him to select a song for her.
" Oh, tliat charming little songibus," he said, " you
sing so sweetly, so divinely. It begins, ' Sing me those
fjentle strains ajrain.' *"
Sweetly and divinely are strong but most agreeable
words when applied to one"'s voice. She was pleased,
and consoled for having given up the horrid Italian,
and beaan, " Thinsr me thothe scutle thtrains ajrain."
With the exception of the air of absurdity given to it
by lisping, she sung it tolerably well, for ladies gene-
rally do well when they are pleased.
" How very good V said his Lordship. " Tliank
you, thank you — it is exquisite ; but there is a beau-
tiful little sonsjibus called ' Sinir me those strains ai'ain."'
O o O
Would you favour us with that V
Miss Sampson looked at him to see what he meant,
but, alas, the unalterable face told no tales ! Cold, and
bright like moonliglit, it wore its usual calm and in-
teresting expression. Still it was very odd, she had
just sung it ; but then he always expressed liimself
LIFE IN A COLONY. 87
oddly. Was he quizzing her, or was he really so
pleased as to desire to hear it repeated ? Sweet-tem-
pered young ladies, like Miss Sampson, generally adopt
that interpretation where they can that is most agree-
able to their wishes ; and she sung it over again in
her best manner, and with very good eflfect.
" How very good !" he said, approvingly ; " but,
ah, pray don't leave us yet ! It is quite refreshing to
hear such sounds. There is a little songibus 1 think
I heard you once sing ; it is a beautiftil thing."
" What is it ?" said the delighted fair one, looking up
at her o-allant and charming friend, and at the same time
executing a chromatic run on the piano, " What is itf
" Perhaps I can recollect it. It begins, ' Sing me
those gentle strains again.'"
Her eyes became suddenly dim, there was a total
eclipse of those beautiful orbs, and for a moment she
was in utter darkness, she was so near fainting. There
could be no mistake now, he had not heard a word of
it ; and was so completely absorbed in contemplating
himself in a large mirror, that he had even forgotten
the phrases of unmeaning compliment he had so me-
chanically used. Exerting herself to conceal her vexa-
tion, she rose and returned to her seat. This painful
disclosure of total indifference had dissolved in an in-
stant some little airy fabrics her imagination had been
rearing during the past year ; and what rendered it the
more provoking was, that the slight was offered in public,
and by one of her own " thett."
88 THE OLD JIDHE ; OR,
The Bisliop, iiioanwliilc, had taken but little part
in the conversation. The topics were new to liini, and
he was thrown out. Now he made an effort to draw
it towards the subjects that filled his heart, namely,
himself and his projects. He described the agreeable
voyage he had made with Captain Jones from England,
extolled his kindness in offering to land him at the
Isle of Sable, and expressed his wonder that clergy-
men should in general be so unpopular with sailors.
" I will tell your Lordship," said the Captain. '" I
am inclined to think, although you are better informed
on these subjects than I am, that Jonah nmst have
been a very troublesome passenger before such good-
natured fellows as seamen would have handled him so
rouo-hly as to throw him overboard. But, talking of
the Isle of Sable, reminds me of what I ought to have
mentioned to your Lordship before, that we sail for
that charming little island — that Paradise of the (Julf
Stream, that scene of primitive innocence, to-night, at
eleven o'clock. If you will be on the King's Wharf
at half-past ten, sharp, with your traps, I will liave
some of my ' little lambs' there to attend you. I will
answer for their being tliere at tliat moment, for they
know I am the most punctual man in the world."
The Bishop was disconcerted. It was a short no-
tice — too short, indeed, to be at all agreeabh.' ; but
eccentricity knows no limits, and recognises no laws :
so, making the best of it, he departed with his friend,
who took his leave contrary to all colonial ctifpiette,
LIFE IN A COLONY. 89
which restrains any one from retiring until the Gover-
nor sets the example.
"• What a very odd man Captain Jones is !" said
his Excellency.
"Very," replied the Colonel; "but, at the same
time, he is one of the most valuable officers in the
service, although I confess his indulgence to his men
is sometimes very perplexing to his friends. He is an
exact and rigid disciplinarian, but shows them every
kindness compatible with a strict observance of duty.
He calls them ' his lambs,"* and they are allowed to
come on shore in very large parties, and have got up
a very pretty quarrel with my fellows. Sometimes
the soldiers charge them, and drive them into their
boats, but oftener they have the best of it themselves ;
yet, in all cases, he complains that those dare-devils
(his lambs) have a hard time of it, and are ill used.
Eccentricity is often the accompaniment of great talent,
and that is the reason so many blockheads affect it.
His, however, is genuine, although he is not to be
compared, in that respect, with a gentleman of my
acquaintance in one of the adjoining provinces. I took
shelter from a thunder-shower one day in a country
inn, to which others had fled for the same purpose,
and, among the rest, one of the most eminent men of
the bar of the colony. Every one was tired and bored
to death by the continuance of the rain, but he was at
no loss for amusement. He made a small bow of
whalebone, and, procuring a large needle (which the
90 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
landlady called a darnin2:-needle), for an arrow, he put
on a pair of spectacles, and coninieuced shooting mos-
quitoes, as they flew by or about him, to the great
danger and infinite annoyance of every one in the
house. I never saw a more eager sportsman, or one
more delighted when he made a good shot. His shouts
of laughter came from his very heart."
Here the conversation was enlivened by a very ab-
surd incident. Amons: the guests was a rou<rh old
Commissary-General, who was exceedingly deaf. A
merchant, a vulgar acquaintance of Channing, taking
pity on his infirmity, sat down beside him for the
puq)ose of talking to him. The old gentleman, taking
up his trumpet, asked his friend why his wife was not
of the party.
" One of ' our brats' is ill," replied the merchant.
" Then I know how to pity you," said the Comniis-
sarj'. " They are a great nuisance; I am plagued to
death with them, I have so many."
" It has the croup," answered the other, raising his
voice.
" A coop !" replied the deaf man ; " that is not a
bad idea, if you could only manage to coax them into
it, but I never could."
" They have nearly eat mo out of house and home."
" How shocking !" said the other, in great amaze-
ment. " Shocking, sir !" he continued, becoming ani-
mated with his subject : " there never was anything
like it in the world. But FU tell you how to get rid
LIFE IN A COLONY. 91
of them quietly. Dou't use arsenic, because you might
poison yourself, but steep some bread in prussic acid,
and give them as much of that as they can eat, and
you will soon find a difference in your baker's and
butcher's bill, I can tell you."
"What in the world," asked the merchant, with un-
feigned astonishment, " are you talking of 2"
" Rats, to be sure," was the answer.
" And I was telling you," rejoined the other, slowly,
distinctly, and loudly, " that one of my children had
the croup."
The effect was electrical ; everybody was convulsed,
except the unruffled aide-de-camp, who contented
himself with merely observing —
" How very good !"
Here the Governor's sleighs were announced, which
was a signal for the breaking up of the party. The
play was now concluded, and the actors withdrew to
their homes ; but there was an afterpiece enacting
elsewhere, the humour of which was broader than
was aafreeable, either to the host or his quests.
Channing escorted his company to the hall, where
were deposited their cloaks and wrappings, but led the
Governor and his staff into his study, where they had
disrobed. The door, though shut, was not closed suf-
ficiently for the action of the lock, and, pushing it
open, he found to his amazement another "thett,"
enjoying themselves infinitely more than that which
had been assembled in the drawing-room. The black
92 THE OLD JUDGE J OR,
cook had belted on the Governor's sword, and decorated
her woolly head with his military hat and Tjlunies,
^ (.'1
which she wore jauntingly and saucily on one side,
while three black, supernumerary servant-men, who
had been hired for the day, having mounted those of
the two aides and the military secretary, were dancing
a reel, with their arms akimbo, to the great amuse-
ment of a boy, who hummed a tune, in an undertone,
for them, and beat time with his fingers on the crown
of his master's hat. So wholly engrossed were they
with their agreeable pastime, that they did not imme-
diately notice our entrance. I shall never forget the
appearance of the cook when she first discovered us.
She stood instantly still in her dancing attitude, her
feet widely extended, and her fists resting on her hips,
as if suddenly petiifiiMl. Her eyes enlarged rapidly
in size, while all the colour fled from them, and they
assumed the appearance of two enormous pieces of
chalk. Her mouth, which was partly open, exhibited
a long transverse streak of ivory ; and the strong con-
trast of black and white in her face would have been
extremely ludicrous, had it not also been very fearful.
Her nostrils, liko those of an aftVighted horse, ex-
panded themselves to their utmost extent ; and respi-
ration and animation seemed wholly suspended, when
she suddenly sprang up from the floor, perpendicularly,
nearly two feet, and screamed out —
" Gor-ormighty ! de Gubbenor !"
Instantly the hats flew, with the rapidity of shuttle-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 93
cocks, on to the table, and the usurpers of the trap-
pings of royalty sought safety in immediate flight.
But the poor cook, in her hasty and discomfited re-
treat, forgot the sword, and, stumbling over it, pitched
forward, and struck with great violence against the
stomach of Trotz, whom she overthrew in her fall,
and rendered speechless from the weight of her body,
and nearly insensible from the concussion of his head
against the marble column that supported the mantel-
piece. A shout of laughter from every one present
followed this summerset, in which the voice of the
good-natured Governor was most conspicuous, for there
is but little use in having aides-de-camp living at
your expence, if you cannot occasionally enjoy a joke
at theirs. Even Lord Edward smiled at the ionoble
overthrow of his coadjutor, and said —
" How very good !"
Trotz was seriously injured, and, for awhile, unable
to recover his breath, and, of course, even to attempt
to rise, or to remove the superincumbent weight of the
unsavoury cook ; while the unfortunate and affrighted
woman, catching the contagion of the general laugh,
was seized with hysterics, and grinned horribly over
the prostrate Tartar, whom she had so unwillingly
made a captive.
The first intelligible ejaculation of Trotz was, that
he was poisoned ; and he called, with many oaths and
imprecations, for instant aid to preserve his life. This
only excited fresh merriment, and awakened anew the
94 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
iilniost convulsive slirieks of tlio sable artiste, who,
meanwhile, refreshed her nearlv inanimate victim with
the balinv air of a breath redok'ut of jrin and raw
onions, with which she supported her stren<^h and
spirits on days of great exertion like the present. Poor
creature ! though deeply versed in tlic mysteries of
her art, she was not well read. Her knowledge was
derived from experience, and not from books ; and she
knew not that Swift had cautioned cooks —
" But lest your kissing should be spoil'd,
The onion must be throughly boil'd."
A blow on the ear from the unmanly fist of the
prostrate aide-de-camp operated like a draught of
water on spasmodic hiccup ; it cured her hysterics
immediatelv, and restored her to her senses. Raising
herself on her knees, which in her haste she planted
on his stomach, and again nearly endangered his life,
she arose and fled from the room. Trotz now managed
to get upon his feet, and, putting one liand to the back
of his head, made the aiireeable discovery of a lariie
contusion, and the other to his hip, was not less an-
noyed to find a rent of sufficient size to admit of a
far freer action of his limbs. The presence of the
Governor repressed the repetition of language that
had already shocked the religious ears of Chauning,
but ho rendered his indignation quite intelligible by
signs and low mutterings. After enveloping himself
in his cloak, he drew out a cambric handkerchief, and
placed it over his head, and then, taking up his hat,
LIFE IN A COLOXV. 95
looked at it and shuddered (as a man labouring under
hydrophobia does at the sight of water), and arranged
it so that it should not contaminate his hair. As soon
as the Governor descended the steps and was out of
hearing, Trotz, before he left the hall, said aloud —
" Dummkopf, this is too bad ! If the Governor
chooses to perform a part in the vulgar farce of High
Life Below Stairs, to make himself popular, you may
attend him if you like, but I won't."
" How very good !" Avere the last words of the
party heard within the walls of the mansion that
night.
Channing, though he could not help laughing at the
absurd scene in the study, was hurt and mortified at
the occurrence. He felt that it mi^ht be told to his
disadvantage, and subject him to ridicule ; but he con-
soled himself with the reflection that it was one for
which he was not answerable, and might have hap-
pened any^N'here else. It was also a comfort to him
to think that Trotz was the only man injured by it,
and that it might be considered not an inapt retribu-
tion for his insolence. On the whole, he was gratified,
not at the occurrences of the day, but that the day
was over, and an important object gained, and a dis-
agreeable duty performed. He knew that he who
passes securely over the shoals and the alarming eddies
of a rapid and dangerous river, has more reason to
rejoice at his safety, than grieve over any little damao-e
his bark may have sustained.
96 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
Ho therefore returned to the drawing-rooin with a
cheerful face. Both himself and hisj wife breathed
freer, Hke people relieved from the weight of an op-
pressive burden. Patting his wife affectionately on
her shoulder, he said —
"Well, Betsv, notwithstanding some blunders and
mistakes, I think it went off very well, on the whole,
as lawyer Reynard said, when he returned from the
funeral of his wife." Then, passing his arm round her
waist, he observed to me (whom he had requested to
remain) —
"Doesn't she look well to-night, Barclay? I never
saw her look better since the day we first "
" Don't talk foolishly, Channing !" said his partner,
diseno-ao-inc herself from his embrace, but looking well
pleased with the compliment (for ladies of a certain
ao-e never hear with indifference that time has dealt
leniently with their charms). " Don't talk foolishly!
I am afraid you have taken too nmch wine to-night !"
He then turned to me, and rubbing his hands, said —
" Well, Jiarclay, that is a very nice, sensible, affable
old man, the Governor. Is he not ^ What do you
think of Lord Edward Dunnnkopf f
" I think,'' I replied, " that there is an uncommon
affinity between liimself and his name. He belongs
to one of the oldest families in England. He is of
Saxon origin, and in the German language his name
sif'nifies Blockhead. There is no harm in him ; in-
deed, there is no harm in an empty room; but the air
LIFE IN A COLONY. 97
is apt to be so uncomfortably cold, as to induce you to
withdraw from it as soon as possible/"'
*' But Trotz V he inquired.
" He," I remarked, " is probably descended from
some low retainer on the Dummkopf estate, for his
name is also Saxon, and signifies Insolence. In the
olden time, most names had a pertinent meaning, and
both these people seem to have inherited the qualities
to which they are indebted for their ancestral cog-
nomen."
" I quite agree with you," he said, " in your esti-
mate of them; and Sir Hercules, I fear, will add
another name to the long list of governors whose per-
sonal staff have rendered themselves and the Govern-
ment-house distasteful to the public. But come with
me to the study, and let us have a glass of whiskey-
punch and a cigar, for it is not often we have the plea-
sure of seeing you at Halifax."
When we were quietly ensconced in this snuggery,
he passed his hand slowly and strongly over his face,
as if to repress a feeling of pain, and said —
" My good friend, Barclay, pray do not let the
folly of this day lower me in your estimation. This
is no idle vanity of either myself or my wife. I am
contented with the sphere in life in which Providence
has placed me ; and am far happier in it than I ever
can be in one for which I am not qualified, either by
my talents or previous habits. But I have acquired
a large property, and have an only son, to whom, with
VOL. L F
98 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
the blessiiifj of God, I intend to give as good an edu-
cation as this country can afford. I am anxious, there-
fore, to acquire a certain position for his sake, for
whicli I am wilhng to pay the penalty, the first painful
instalment of which you have seen produced to-day.
I am not such a blockhead as not to know that I am
unacquainted with the modes and usages of society,
and that I am, what some people have been so anxious
to inform me, a vulgar man. Ihit, thank God," he
said, rising from his chair, and standing with au erect
and proud bearing, " I have also the good sense to
know and to feel, that on this occasion, with the ex-
ception of the Governor himself, we have entertained
a far more vulgar party from Government-house than
ourselves."
" Spoken like yourself, my friend," I said ; " and
now for the punch and the cigars."
Alas ! poor Channing is since dead, and his son,
who inherited his fortune, inherited also his sound
good sense and excellent qualities. His father fulfilled
his intentions as to his education, and sent him to
King's College, Windsor, where, under the paternal
instructions of its excellent princijKil,' he was made
' The gentleman here alluded to is the Rev. Dr. Porter,
who, during an exile of thirty years in this country, educated
nearly all the clergy of this and the adjoining colony of New
Brunswick, many of the judges, and most of the conspicuous
lawyers in both provinces, besides many others, who are filling
various offices of importance, here and elsewhere, with credit
LIFE IN A COLONY. 99
•
a scholar and a gentleman. He is now one of the
greatest ornaments of the bar in the colony ; and, if
he think proper to do so, can " ask a governor to dine"
without occasioning a remark.
to themselves and advantage to the public. He is still living
near Exeter in his native land, to which he retired some few
years ago for the benefit of his health, carrying with him the
respect and esteem of a people upon whom he has conferred
the most incalculable benefit. Should these lines meet his eye,
he will recognise the hand of an old pupil, who hopes that this
unauthorized use of his name will find a palliation in the
affection and gratitude that inserted it.
F 2
100 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
CHAPTER IV.
THE TOMBSTONES.
After divine service yesterday, wc sauntered about
the churchyard, examining the tablets erected by tlie
affection or vanity of the living, to perpetuate the
virtues or record the rank of the dead. In this stroll,
we were joined by Mr. Barclay. He is one of a
numerous class of persons in these colonies, who, though
warmly attached to British connexion, feel that tliey
are practically excluded from imperial employment and
the honours of the empire ; and that no service ren-
dered the Government in a province opens the door to
promotion out of it, or ensures due consideration within
it, in any department not entirely local in its object
and manasemont. A brother of his, an officer of dis-
tinguished merit, who, by accident, had been enabled
to enter the naval service in his youth, had recently
died a lieutenant of more than forty years' standing."
' The London Times, of November 8th, 1846, contains a
biographical notice of the late Lieutenant AVilliam Pringle
Green, R.N., a native of Halifax, Nova Scotia. After enume-
rating his eminent services, and valuable nautical inventions, it
LIFE IN A COLONY. 101
His skill, his unblemished character, and his valuable
services had been repeatedly acknowledged, but as often
forgotten; and his case, which had been much com-
mented upon of late in the English papers, as one of ex-
treme hardship, had created great sympathy at a time
when, alas ! sympathy was unavailing. He will not,
however, have served his country in vain, if the dreadful
sacrifice he has offered of a life of unrequited toil shall
remove this distinctive badge of humiliation, and ame-
liorate the condition of his brave and loyal country-
men, the colonists of North America. ,
Disappointment and grief at the unmerited neglect
of his broken-hearted brother had soured a temper
naturally cynical, and given a bitterness to Mr. Bar-
clay's language, which the Judge, however, assured
me was indicative rather of his habits than his feelings.
He is one of those anomalous characters we sometimes
meet, whose sarcastic tone and manner of conversation
disguise a kind and good heart.
" Here," said my eccentric friend, Lawyer Barclay,
as he is universally called, " here, as elsewhere, the
goes on to say: — "From 1842 until the time of his death, a
few days since, he was not only unemployed, but unrewarded
and neglected, though still devoting his time to the maturing
inventions for the improvement of that service in which he was
so ill-treated. He died at the age of sixty-one, more from the
want of the common necessai'ies of life, than from a decay of
nature ; and has left a widow and seven daughters to subsist (if
they can) upon the pitiful pension of a lieutenant's widow — a
lieutenant of forty -one years ! ! !"
102 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
receipt wliich the grave gives for a human being is
written in a prescribed form. The name, the age, and
the date of his death, are minutely and accurately
entered. If ho has filled an office of importance, or
belonged to a learned profession, or served in the As-
sembly, and, above all, if he has been a member of the
Upper House of the Legislature, and borne the title of
Honourable, it is recorded at large; while, on the other
hand, if he has derived his support from an honest
trade, the dishonest tombstone retiises to mention it,
lest it might wound the aristocratic feelings of his
aspiring posterity.
" It is said that truth is to be found in the wine-butt
and the depths of a well. If revealing the secrets of
others be truth, wine may be the element it loves.
The well can only give it when exhausted, and then
the fact it has to conmiunicate is found to be scarcely
worth the trouble of the search, namely, that the well
is empty. Wherever it is to be sought for, one thing
is certain, it is not to be found on a tombstone. The
broken-hearted husband who erects a monument to
record his inconsolable grief for the loss of his wife,
ere one short year has passed, or the sound of the
sculptor^s mallet has ceased, refutes the pompous false-
hood 1)}^ a second marriage ; and eyes as bright and
voice as sweet as those that are closed by death se-
duce liini into a disavowal of his own words, ' Here
licth the best of wives,' and compel him to acknowledge
' Hero tlic husband lies." The disconsolate widow
LIFE IN A COLONY. 103
whose affections are buried in the grave of her dear hus-
band, near whom she desires soon to repose in death,
feels her heart reanimated with the genial warmth
of returning spring. It rises from the earth with the
primrose, shakes off its wintry torpor, and re-appears
with renewed Hfe and vigour after its short seclusion.
The admired of all admirers no longer refuses to be
comforted. The churlish miser receives the homage
of insincerity from his heir even after death, when his
cold and mouldering; ear can no long-er listen to its
flatterino- accents. A chaste and beautiful alleo-orical
figure of Affection is seen weeping over his urn, which
rests on a pedestal that resembles a money-chest ; you
are lost in doubt whether the tears so copiously shed
are caused by unexpected legacies to others, or by the
protracted delay of possession. This is a double fraud.,
It represents the dead as worthy of love, and the living
as capable of loving. It is not gratitude, but a decent
observance of a hypocritical custom.
" But why are men so shocked at the mention of
that on a tombstone which the deceased published
throuo-hout his life to all the world ? In this church-
yard, numerous as the graves are, no man is designated
as tailor, barber, butcher, baker, or shoemaker ; yet,
doubtless, there are scores of each who placed these
ominous and forbidden words on their signs in the
largest letters, and the most attractive and conspicuous
form. There is, indeed, one exception, if such it can
be called. This marble was erected to a man who is
104 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
described as ' a scrvaDt,*' but it was raised at the ex-
pense of ' a friend,'' that styk'd himself his master,
who, in ciiunK ratini:- his excellent qualities, luis not
forgotten to proclaim his own liberality, nor been
ashamed to inform us that he h.as expended more money
in extolling his services than in rewardino; them. It
has been said that the jri-ave knows no distinctions.
The rule is now reversed, it seems. All are not re-
duced bv it to a level, for the level is on a summit,
and all are elevated to it. Be it so ; but then strike
out all your degrees, your D.D.'s, your M.D.'s, the
words Judge, Councillor, Barrister, Esquire, and let
the rank of the dead be uniform. Of all places in the
world, a graveyard, at least, should be consecrated to
truth. As it is, it seems devoted to flattery, vanity,
ambition, ostentation, and falsehood. All sects retain
their peculiarities here, and endeavour to perpetuate
them. A little more taste, and a little more expense
in the monument (but with a contemptuous disregard
of veracity in its record), indicate that a churchman is
deposited there (for the Church in the colony embraces
the greater part of the upper class of society). A neat,
plain, substantial one, with the modest assurance that
the soul of the deceased was innnediately conveyed to
heaven, proclaims the saint to have been a Dissenter.
'' The common Cliristian emblem of the Cross is
more in use among Romanists than others, but you
may identify thcui by their pious horror of Protestants.
It would be dangerous to be found in such bud com-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 105
pany, for the Pope lias declared they cannot be saved ;
and who can question such high authority? They,
therefore, very wisely lie apart from the dust that is
polluted by heresy. If you are still in doubt, read
one of the inscriptions, and a scrap of Latin sets the
matter at rest. It is an appropriate tongue, for it is
" a dead language." In this curtilage, then, which is
the common burial-place of all, sectarianism and fashion
have found their way and offered their distinctive
badges to their followers. The highway of life has
been extended into the churchyard, and is thronged in
its usual manner. Here are the handsome equipages
and expensive trappings of the rich, the sobriety of the
middle classes, and the destitution of the nameless and
unknown poor. The scale of colonial precedence sur-
vives mortality. The mitred bishop still regards, with
a condescending and patronising air, the poor curate ;
and the grocer looks doAvn from his marble monument
upon his quondam labourer with his turf covering, and
maintains his relative position in the society of the
dead. The iron railing boasts of its quality and dura-
bility, and regards with pity or contempt the temporary
and trumpery wooden enclosure. The classic urn ap-
peals only to the hearts of scholars, and the bust to
the man of taste; while all look up to him who
represented his King, and whose titles are almost as
lono- as his eulooium — the old Governor — the foun-
tain of honour, and the distributor of patronage and of
rank.
F 5
lOG THE OLD JUDGE ; OU,
'• Amid all this vanity — here and there is to be
t'uund some consistency — the antiqnated virgin pre-
serves her acidity of temper to the last. She is one
of those of whom vulgar people so idly and 11i[)puutly
predict ^ that they dry, but never die."* Accustomed
to hear such agreeable compliments, she anticipates
the sneer or the smile of youth upon linding the word
' Miss *" associated with seventy-four years of age ;
and as in life she maintained the privilege of the last
word, so in death she claims a right to the first ; and
youth and beauty are admonished that ere long they
must undergo the penalty of the law of their nature,
and be humbled in the dust like herself. She thus
avenges the slights and injuries of an unfeeling world,
and, consistent to the last, evinces her fondness for dis-
agreeable truths.
" The houses of this silent city are of various sizes.
There are fashionable squares, there are streets of less
pretension, and there are suburbs that are but little
frequented, for they are the abodes of the lower orders.
If you nmst dwell among the latter, it would be best
to preserve a strict incognito. A mansion in St.
Giles's would prove your habits to have been dissolute,
your associates depraved, and your means exhausted.
It would disgrace your posterity for ever. A respect-
able address is a letter of credit, but the occupant of
mean lodgings is cut by his acquaintance and disowned
bv his familv. If you would be re<i;arded as a gentle-
man, you must associate with fashionable people, and
LIFE IN A COLONY. 107
reside among them. The churchyard, strange as it
may seem, is a true but painful picture of Hfe — osten-
tation without, corruption within; peace and quiet on
the surface, but the worm at the heart. Ah, poor human
nature ! your last resting-place, the grave, would be
eloquent, if you did not stifle its voice. Do not read
these inscriptions, my friend," he continued, " there
is no dependence to be placed on anything but the
figures ; the tale they tell is not true. But come with
me, and I will show you a grave that bears that upon
it that carries conviction to the heart,"
On a little mound, in a distant corner of the
churchyard, was a grove of spruce-trees, enclosing a
verdant spot of small dimensions. Here was a soli-
tary grave, having at the foot a common field-stone to
mark its termination ; and, at the head, another of
the same kind, one side of which was dressed with a
chisel, and bore the inscription " Mary Merton, 1840."
The whole of this little plat of ground was enclosed
by a rough rustic railing, having a small gate for the
purpose of access. The grave was not covered with
sods, but decorated with patches of forget-me-not and
other simple flowers, emblematical of the feeling and
the object with which they were placed there, and
was encircled by white rose-bushes. At the upper
part of the enclosure, but outside of the railing, stood
a weeping willow, the light pendent tracery of which
fell like the dishevelled hair of a mourner whose head
was bending over the body it loved and lamented.
108 THE OLD .lUDCE; OR.
The little spot was kept in perfect order, and tended
■with the most careful neatness.
" There, 8ir !'' he said, "there, at least, is truth.
That simple and natural enihelli.shnient is the votive
offering of a poor widow to her only child. Those
flowers are weeded by her hands, and watered with her
tears. Where is the sting of death, or the victory of
the grave, when, like that little innocent and helpless
victim, the dead survive decay, and rise again to dwell
in the hearts and affections of the livinjx ? It is re-
freshing to see simplicity and truth amid so much that
is false and unnatural. This is a strange world.
Take man individually, and there is much that is
good and amiable in liiiii ; but take men collectively,
and they are always rapacious or unjust. Parties
are but combinations, under plausible pretences, to
deceive the people ; public departments are stern and
cruel ; governments are ungrateful ; patronage is
either blind and cannot distinguish, or selfish and
capricious. A man who serves his country with
ability and zeal is too apt to find at last, to his cost,
that his country, like a corporate body, has neither a
soul to think, a heart to feel, a head to remember, or a
spirit of liberality to reward."
" Come, come, my friend," said the Judge, well
knowing the cause of this bitter ebullition, "■ you have
too much reason to complain, I fear, to do so calmly.
Let us not enter into these speculations on this day
and in this place. Let us rather yield to the influence
LIFE IN A COLONY. 109
of the objects around us. I, too, am fond of this spot
for the lasting affection it exhibits. Fathers may for-
get their offspring, and children lose the remembrance
of their parents ; husbands and wives may be replaced,
and brothers and sisters be to each other as strangers
and even as foes, but the love of a mother endureth
for ever. A father supplies the wants of his child
from his purse, a mother from her bosom. Even the
grave itself cannot extinguish her devotion. She
mourns over her deceased infant in solitude and in
silence. It is always before her. Its voice is in
her ear, and its smile is in her heart. Memory
raises up the little idol to her admiring eyes by day,
and the too vivid dream reanimates it by night. Her
maternal aftections regard it as a living being, and
she longs to fondle and embrace it, while the divinity
within her sympathizes with it as celestial, and in-
vests it with the attributes of a ministering angel.
She holds strange and mysterious communings with
it, for love such as hers has an ideal world of its own.
Her wounded spirit flutters against the barriers of its
human prison, and strives to escape and join that
which has ' put on immortality C and at last, when
wearied with its ineffectual struggles, it yields in
timid submission to the law of its nature — it indulges
the hope that that which is imperishable may be per-
mitted to revisit the object of its love, and illumine,
by its mystical presence, the depths of its gloom. Her
grief, therefore, produces at last its own solace, and
110 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
she cherishes it with an hunihle but a firm reHance upon
the mercy and goodness of God, that her ohild sliall
be fully restored to her in another and a better world,
where thev shall dwell tojretlior in unity for ever.
" There is something, as you say, about this little
gi-avc that is very attractive ; for youth is innocent,
and innocence is always an object of interest and of
love. Age, on the contrary, is venerable, but not
loveable. I see nothing in the termination of a ripe
old age to occasion grief, unless there has been a mis-
spent life. There is nothing to regret where all, or
more, has been given than was promised —
' Lusisti satis, edisti satis atque bibisti,
Tempus abire tibi est.'
But youth, prematurely cut off, awakens many a pain-
ful reflection. I recollect being greatly struck with a
monument erected to a young oflicer at Shelburne,
who perished under very peculiar circumstances. The
story itself is short and simple, but, as it is connected
with the rise and fall of that ill-fatod and melancholy
town, I will give you the history of both together.
Let us sit down on this tombstone, for it is a fitting
seat from which to tell a tale of mortality.
" Last summer I made a tour of the province, and
revisited the scenes of my former judicial labours.
The growth and improvement of the country far ex-
ceeded my expectations. In many places where the
road ran, a few years ago, through an unbroken forest,
LIFE IN A COLONY. Ill
it was now bordered on either side by a continuous
line of farms ; and substantial houses and large herds
of cattle evinced the condition of the new population.
The towns and villages were greatly increased, and an
improved system of husbandry had changed the whole
appearance of the country. The habits of the people
also had undergone an alteration for the better no less
strikiuo; and oratifvinof. Still it was by no means a
journey of unmixed pleasure. A generation had
passed away, if not from life, from its business and
duties. Many whom I had known I could not at first
recoo-nise : care, time, and disease, had not been idle.
The young had become men, the men had grown old,
and the old had died or withdrawn from view. I was
a stranger araons: stransjers. The houses I had fre-
quented during the circuits were either enlarged, re-
modelled, or rebuilt. A new race of people welcomed
me, and the well-known voice and the well-kno\vn face
were nowhere to be heard or seen. My local interest
was the same, but my personal interest had gone, and
ffone for ever.
" At home, these changes are so gradual that they
are almost imperceptible. The vacant place soon col-
lapses, or is occupied by another, and harmonises with
all around. It becomes incorporated with the rest,
and cannot be distino-uished from it. In this manner,
an entire revolution is effected, and yet that revolution
is so slow and so gradual in its growth, and contains
so much to which we are daily accustomed, that the
1 1 2 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
eye cannot discern where the old ceases or the new
begins. ]Jut, when we return to past scenes, after an
absence of many years, the whole change bursts on
our astonished view at once. We knew it as it was,
we see it as it is, and we feel and know it is not the
same. We are painfully reminded, at the same time,
that we have been ourselves no less under the influence
of this universal law of mutability : we return to our
own, and our own knoweth us no more. The face of
Nature, though here and there partially transformed
by the hand of man, was in the main unaltered. The
mountains, with their wavy outline distinctly marked
against the clear blue sky, or their summits enveloped
in mists, were the same as when my youthful eye first
rested on them. The rivers, the valleys, the nuirmur-
ing brooks, the wide-spread alluvial meadows, covered
with grazing herds, the sheltered and placid lakes, and
the rugged cliffs and bold promontories that invaded
the sea, or resisted its assaults, were all unchanged.
The road also on the sea-shore wore the same familiar
aspect, and the ceaseless roar of the ocean saluted my
ear with the same voice that first awakened my adven-
turous hope to pass to that fatherland that lies beyond
the great deep. At night, as I walked out meditating
on the past, the pale silver moon and its starry host
proclaimed that they also were unchanged, and re-
called many a long-forgotten scene in years by-gone,
before all that has been was, or reflection came to teach
us that youth has its shadow, that increases as the day
LIFE IN A COLONY. 113
declines, and that that shadow is death. These visible
objects of nature, therefore, become dearer and dearer
to us as we advance in years. They are our early, our
constant, and sole surviving friends, the same to-day
and to-morrow as they were of old. They are typical
of Him who knoweth no change.
" As far as Shelburne, all was progressive or rapid
improvement, but that unfortunate town was in ruins.
It arose in the wilderness like a work of magic, but had
hardly been erected before it was in a state of decay.
Twelve or fourteen thousand emigrant lovalists from
New York sought shelter in this remote place at the
close of the war of rebellion, in the year 1784, and
built a large, commodious, and beautiful wooden town,
at the head of the magnificent harbour of Rosewav.
In their haste, or their necessity, they overlooked the
fact, that a town requires a country to support it, unless
a trade which has groAvn with its growth supplies
its wants upon equal terms. Remote from the other
settlements of the province, surrounded by a trackless
forest, that covers a poor and stony soil, situated too
far from the entrance of the harbour to reap the ad-
vantages of the fishing-grounds, and filled with a popu-
lation unaccustomed to the mode, and unequal to the
fatigues, of settling in a wilderness, it was impossible
that a town so constituted could Ions: exist. Some
returned penniless and destitute to their native land,
others removed to various parts of Nova Scotia, and
the grave-yard, from year to year, received great
IJi THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
numbera of those that were left beliind, to mourn with
broken hearts over their ruined fortunes, their hopless
and helpless condition, and their dreary exile. When
I had last seen it, the houses were still standinc;, though
untenanted. It had all the stillness and quiet of a
moonlight scene. It was difficult to imagine it was
deserted. The idea of repose more readily suggested
itself than decay. All was new and recent. Seclu-
sion, and not death or removal, appeared to be the
cause of the absence of inhabitants. But now the
houses which had been originally built of wood had
severally disappeared. Some had been taken to pieces,
and removed to Halifax, or St. John's ; others had
been converted into fuel, and the rest had fallen a prey
to neglect and decomposition. Tlie chimneys stood
up erect, and marked the spot round which the social
circle had assembled; and the blackened fireplaces,
ranged one above another, bespoke the size of the tene-
ment and the means of its owner. In some places
they had sunk with the edifice, leaving a heap of ruins ;
while not a few were inclining to their fiill, and await-
ing the first storm to repose again in the dust that now
covered those who had constructed them. Hundreds
of cellars, with their stone walls and granite partitions,
were everywhere to be seen, like uncovered monuments
of the dead. Time and decay had done their work.
All that was perishable had perished, and those nume-
rous vaults spoke of a generation that had passed away
for ever, and, without the aid of an inscription, told a
LIFE IN A COLONY. 115
tale of sorrow and of sadness that overpowered the
heart.
" A few new houses had recently been erected, and
a very few of the old had been snatched from decay
and repaired ; but, of the thousands of inhabitants
that this town once contained, four or five survivors
alone remained, and the entire population did not ex-
ceed two thousand souls. They were all attached to
the place, and spoke confidently of its revival, fondly
of its noble harbour, and proudly of its former pro-
sperity. Every spot had its little history. Here the
pilgrims first landed, and this spacious street was the
first that was cut out through the woods. On that
brido-e the bands of the reo-imeuts assembled on a
summer"'s evening to play the tunes of their father-
land. In the house which once stood over this large
cellar. Field- ^Marshal Beresford was quartered when a
young officer in the garrison, and in that sedgy piece
of ground was wounded in the face by an accidental
discharge fi-om the gun of a brother sportsman. On
that eminence, on the opposite side of the harbour,
stood extensive barracks, capable of accommodating
three regiments ; and on the point of land that termi-
nates King''s Street was a heavy battery, the guns of
which, coiToded by time, lie half-buried in the earth ;
for, alas ! there is nothinfj now to defend. At this
corner stood the great hotel of Shelburne, where the
weekly balls were held, and the beauty and fashion of
the old colony of New York (for the Loyalists were
116 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
principally gentry) assembled for the last time. Driven
into exile by tiieir rebel countrymen, and environed in
the country of their adoption by poverty, and a dim
and lowering future, they vainly sought to fly from
regret, and lose the painful memory of the past in fes-
tivity and amusement. 'JMiat spacious chureli, which
is now so far from the village, was once in the centre
of this large town ; and the number of the graves in
the cemetery bear a frightful disproportion to the
present population.
" While strolling one afternoon through the deserted
and grass-grown street that passes in front of this
building, my attention was attracted by a very hand-
some and apparently new monument, which appeared
to have been just erected, — probably to one of the last
of this ill-fated emifjration. It was built of the bcauti-
ful granite that abounds in the neighbourhood, and its
fresh-chiselled surface glistened in the sun, as its rays
fell on the bright and polished particles of mica em-
bedded in its indestructible substance. It was a
costly structure, not in keeping with the means of the
present inhabitants, and evidently could not have been
executed by any workman then resident at Shelburne.
It occurred to me tliat, perhaps, the aflection or the
piety of a child had erected this tribute to the memory
or misfortunes of a parent who had found rest at last
ill this secluded spot. My curiosity was excited, and,
opening a little gate, I entered the yard to ascertain,
from the inscription, the name and history of this
LIFE IN A COLONY. 117
venerable patriarch. I was, however, astonished to
find that it was nearly as old as the town, and de-
si|^ned, not for one of the pilgrims, but for a young
officer who had been drowned in the harbour. The
inscription was as follows : —
Sacred
to the Memory of
Patrick Maxwell, Esq.,
Ensign in His Majesty's 6Ist or First
Warwickshire Infantry,
and Son of
Sir William Maxwell,
of Spring Hill, Bart., N.B.,
who was unfortunately upset
in a Sail-boat,
10th July, 1790, and
drowned,
^tat. 19,
deeply regretted by
his afflicted parents,
and all who knew hira.
" Such an untimely and melancholy death is un-
happily one of daily occurrence, and his was only dis-
tinguishable from others of the same kind by a trait
of generous manliness that deserves to be recorded. I
have just told you there was a large battery and
guard-house at the termination or commencement of
King's Street, and very extensive barracks on the
opposite side of the harbour — an arrangement which
had, probably, been adopted for the greater seclusion
118 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
and better nianagonient of the troops. Between these
two stations boats were constantly passing and repas-
sing, eitlici- (lit l)iisiness or pk»a.siire. On the day
mentioned on the tablet, a victualling-barge, contain-
ing a party of soldiers and two (tflicers, was struck
about tlic centre of the harbour by a heavy squall, and
upset, ami every soul on board perished, with the ex-
ception of the sergeant. Young Maxwell was one of
the unfortunate sufferers.^ The sergeant, who was an
expert swinnner, generously took him on his back, and
struck out boldly for the shore. Miscalculating]: his
power, however, he swam too hastily, and had not pro-
ceeded fiir before his strensrth beoan to fail. Maxwell,
as soon as he perceived him falter, expressed his deter-
mination to relieve him of the burden he had so kindly
assumed. He exhorted liini to be cool and collected,
to proceed slowly, but, above all things, to persevere
on account of his wife and children ; and then, bidding
him adieu, relinquished his hold, and sunk to rise no
more.
- " My first feeling on reading the inscription was one
that is common to us all when we hear of the untiinely
death of the young, but rellection soon took another
turn. If now living, he would have been seventy-five
years of ag( — a tottering, decrepit old man like myself,
' On the reverse side of this monument was an inscri[ition of
a similar nature to Lieutenant Nicholas Ball, of the same regi-
ment, who perished on this occasion. Both bodies were deposited
in one grave.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 119
fiill of years and infirmities. Had he been then spared,
I asked myself, would he have survived till this day ?
Or would disease have put in its claim, or the battle-
field held him as a victim ? Was ignominy avoided or
honour lost by that event ? Would his career in life
have been unmarked, or has a name perished that was
destined to grace the pages of his country's history ?
All, alas ! is hidden in impenetrable mystery. But
reason and religion alike teach us this great consola-
tory truth, that a wise and merciful Providence orders
all things for the best.
" As regards monuments, however, I agree with
you, Barclay. I neither approve of the imagery, em-
blems, or language we use. Less flattery and more
truth, less reference to worldly vanities and more re-
signation to the will of God, a total exclusion of heathen
allegories and the introduction of such only as are of
Christian origin, would be infinitely more appropriate
and becoming. If we are to be addressed from the
grave, it shovild be in language calculated to make us
wiser and better men ; for we do not seek these so-
litudes to gratify our tastes, but to purify our hearts,
and to enable us, by a contemplation of the fate of
others, to prepare for the inevitable approach of our
own."
120 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
CHAPTER V.
A BALL AT GOVERNMENT HOUSE.
On our return to Illinoo, our recent visit to Halifax
and its incidents naturally became the subject of con-
versation, and, among other things, Government House
and its inmates were adverted to.
" The situation of a Governor,'' said the Judge,
" is by no means an enviable one. He is insufficiently
paid, seldom properly supported by the Colonial Office;
and no sooner becomes acquainted with the people and
the country than his term of service expires. The
province is then again entrusted to a stranger, who
goes through the same process of acquiring experience,
with great personal labour, annoyance, and inconveni-
ence to himself, and with some danger, and no little
alarm, to the inhabitants; while his best exertions
and intentions are often frustrated, and his domestic
comfort destroyed, by the petty insolence and insigni-
ficant intrigues of the little leaders of little political
factions about him.
" "Recent democratic changes in the constitution of
the colonies have rendered his position still more diffi-
cult, by limiting the prerogative, transferring nmch of
LIFE IN A COLONY. 121
his authority to his council, and making public offices
not the reward of merit, but of agitation. With po-
litics, however, I have nothing to do. I not only take
no interest in them, but I even dislike to hear them
discussed. A Governor, however, if he be a man of
honour, and a gentleman, is really an object of pity.
As far as we have been concerned ourselves, we have
been extremely fortunate in the selection that has
been made for us, and are enabled to enumerate a
long list of very clever as well as very amiable men ;
but as my experience extends over a long series of
years, and is by no means limited to our North Ame-
rican possessions, I have been sometimes amused at
them as a class, and at the diflferent manner in which
they severally attempt to accomplish the object they
all have in view ; namely, to conduct their admi-
nistration satisfactorily to their employers, and to
the people committed to their charge. To secure the
approbation of the authorities at home, it is merely
necessary to keep things quiet, for they have them-
selves made every concession for this purpose, to
every troublesome party, until there is little left noAv
but total independence to concede. To preserve this
tranquillity, therefore, necessarily involves the same
policy on the part of a Governor, and, consequently, the
necessity for a certain degree of personal popularity.
It is the pursuit of this popularity that calls forth
the peculiarities and character of the man : some
resting it, where it ought to be, on the honest
VOL. I. G
122 THE OLD JIDGE; OR,
and inflexible discliarge of duty ; others on tact, a
knowledge of character, or some personal qualification,
that renders tliein agreeable. As a class, therefore,
they naturally present a great variety.
" For instance, there is ' your man-of-business Go-
vernor,' accessible at all times, punctual in the per-
formance of his own duty, and strict in requiring a
corresponding exactness in others — aft'able, cautious,
but decided. Then there is your ' scheming Governor,*'
a man before his age, who delights in theories — has
visions of greatness for his little empire, desires to
have the people habited in garments, which, if they
do not fit, are admirably well calculated to admit of an
extended growth of the body and limb ; who talks of
systems, heads of departments, and boards, and will
neither see nor hear of diffioulties, as, in his opinion,
there never are any that are insurmountable, and who
treats the Secretary of State to long reports, for the
amusement of the clerks to report upon. Next comes
your ' entertaining Governor,"* who keeps an hospitable
table, gives numerous parties, is full of anecdote, and
tells his stories well, pays due attention to country
members and their fashionable and agreeable wives
and daughters, takes care that his stafl' are attentive
to those who stand in need of attentions, and dance
M-ith those who cannot command partners, and who
arranges his dinners so as to bring together people
who know each other and are agreeable. As for busi-
ness, he obeys orders from home, interferes personally
LIFE IN A COLONY. 123
as little as possible, and suffers things to take their
course.
" Then, there is your ' humbugging Governor,'' who
bows and smiles to all, says civil things to everybody,
and of everybody, makes long speeches, and writes
long messages, adopts no side warmly, has no decided
opinions, is with the majority, but lives with the mi-
nority, so he can co-operate with them, too, if they
become strong enough ; is attached to the Church, for
he was born and bred in it ; is fond of the Romanists,
for they are numerous, and devoted to British con-
nexion ; to the Baptists, because freedom of opinion is
the right of all, especially of those who form so large
a body ; and of the Scotch Dissenters, on account of
their abhorrence of democratic principles, and because
he has often witnessed and admired their amiability at
home, and the brotherly love they exhibit to the church
abroad. In short, he is 'all things to all men' — a
hand for all, a word for all, and a fig for all.
" Then, there is your ' dashing Governor,' a regular
politician, who believes that every man has his price,
reo-ards all provincials as scoundrels, and thinks their
price small ; will carry his measures coute qui coute ;
has a strons: smack of Eno-lish Radicalism, and flatters
the vanity of colonial Liberals ; knows the little points
of little men, and talks of the vast resources of the
colony, the important geographical, relative, and po-
litical position of it ; the able views and great scope
of intellect of its statesmen ; advocates a united legis-
G 2
124 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
lature for all the colonies, the creation of a Viceroy,
and the construction of a railroad to the Pacific, and
other gigantic projects — tubs for the whale.
" There are also your ' purely civil,' or ' purely
military Governors.*' The former has no command,
and, of course, is by no means so well paid as the
other; is subject to some inconvenience from the want
of this control, and \s in occasional collision with
the Commandant, not in matters of importance (for
then it seldom or never occurs), but in insignificant,
and, therefore, more annoying afiairs. He procures
the attendance of a regimental band at his parties as a
favour, and tolerates their airs as an unavoidable evil.
Although familiar with, and hospitable to, the officers
of the garrison, ho never enjoys their sympathies like
an old General. Unless he is a man of rank himself,
the Admiral, it is observed, is more apt to stand on
etiquette and rights with him than if he were a soldier,
for they again both pertain to the profession of arms,
although not to the same branch of the service. The
latter, or purely military man, delights rather in the
appellation of General than that of Governor ; is
fonder of assembling his troops than his legislature,
and is more at homo with the officers of his brigade
than with the officers of his colony. He would rather
talk of the Punjaub than the Maddawaska, and the
heads of columns than the heads of departments. He
says but little, promises less ; but does what he says.
He refers every thing to the department to which it
LIFE IN A COLONY. 125
belongs, and acts on the report of the principal. He
takes no responsibility. If the assembly flares up, so
does he ; begs them to accept the assurance of his
most profound indifterence, and informs them that he
was a General before he was a Governor. If they
petition the Sovereign, he thanks them for it ; tells
them he is an old and faithful servant of the Crown,
and has been so long abroad he is in danger of being
forsfotten : that their memorial will call attention to
the fact that he is still living, and serving his King
with zeal and fidelity.
" These peculiarities are either generated or dis-
closed by the duties and necessities of the station, and
are the various effects on the human mind of a morbid
de.sire for applause. Under any circumstances, this
high functionary can now personally effect but little
good, in consequence of the restrictions and limitations
imposed upon his authority : but he is by no means
equally powerless for evil, and, if he should, unfor-
tunately, be surrounded by a needy or unprincipled
council, and be deficient either in a knowledge of his
duty, or in firmness of purpose, the country may suffer
incalculable injury.
" One of my predecessors on the bench, a man of
great humour and eccentricity, used gravely to main-
tain, that the only person fit for the situation was a
wise man or a fool. ' If he really is a wise man,' he
used to say, ' he will govern by himself, and not by
favourites ; if he is a fool, he will not think of holding
12G Tin: OLD jrnnE; or,
the reins at all, but entrust them wholly to the consti-
tuted authorities."" Your indift'orent Governors, gene-
rally speakina:, are your clever men, or, according to
the cant phrase of modern times, your 'talented men,'
— people who are intelligent enough to be conceited,
and yet have not sufficient ability to dispense with
advice.
" These great guns, therefore, as my friend Barclay
calls them, are, as a matter of course, of dift'erent
calibre and weight, and their effect is in proportion.
Some carry as true, and are as unerring, as a rifle ;
others, though they hit the mark, have no power of
condensation, and do mischief by scattering. This one
overshoots the object, and that falls short of it. Some
hang fire from indecision, and others go off unexpect-
edly from impetuosity. All these failures arise from
want of previous preparation, either by having served
in one or other of the houses of Parliament, or filled
some of the higher offices in a colony. Suitable per-
sons, I admit, are not easily found; but, confining the
selection to general officers increases the difficulty, in-
asmuch as a military education, and the life and habits
i)f a soldier, have a tendency to unfit them for consti-
tutional jrovernment. Indeed, somr difficulty will be
experienced in future, in inducing gentlemen to accept
an office, the emoluments of which are insufficient to
defray the ordinary expenditure, and the duties, both
onerous and responsible — many of them excessively
disaijreeable, and all accompanied by the most offensive
LIFE IN A COLONY. 127
abuse and misrepresentation of an unbridled and licen-
tious press.
" Much of this, if not all, may be regarded with
pity or contempt by a well-regulated mind ; but, un-
fortunately, custom has sanctioned, until time has con-
verted into a duty, the practice of indiscriminate hos-
pitality, whereby the privacy of his house, and the
comfort of his family, are effectually destroyed. Men
are to be seen at a Governor's table who are to be met
with nowhere else ; and people are brought together
whose previous intercourse has extended no further
than purchases made through the intervention of a
servant at the market-place. The consequence is, that,
instead of exhibiting the best. Government House
affords the worst specimen of society in the province.
Independently of the annoyance to which all are sub-
ject by such an association, the Governor, his staff,
and strangers, naturally infer that this anomaly is the
general condition of colonial society. The ignorance,
awkwardness, and presumption thus displayed, are
taken as characteristics of the whole ; and many anec-
dotes are in circulation to the disadvantage of Halifax
and other provincial capitals, that are chargeable alone
on the extraordinary mixture that this ill-regulated
hospitality produces.
" You have seen the Governor under more favour-
able circumstances ; for you have merely dined with
him and some of his friends, and, fortunately, at a
time when the town was not filled with the 'gentlemen
128 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
from the rural districts,"' and, of course, when he was
enabled to escape from tlieir intrusion. There are times
when the ' palace' may be said to be out of season, it
is so distasteful ; and it is necessary that you should
see it, and the balls given at that period, fully to
understand what I mean. The most amusing part of
this folly is, that people who are excluded for their
misconduct (although not admitted elsewhere) for-
mally complain of it as a grievance, and actually
maintain that the Governor is not only bound to ex-
tend his invitations to those that are unfit, but even
to those that are unworthy. One cannot but feel for
the indignity and annoyance he must continually endure
from this cause. It reminds me of an anecdote told
me by Sir John Sherbrooke, when he commanded here.
" He had given permission to his house-steward and
butler — two of the tallest and larijest men in Halifax
— to give an entertainment to their friends, and invite
as many as they thought proper, in their own apart-
ment at his house. A day or two after the party, a
diminutive but irascible barber, who was in the habit
of attending upon him, complained, in the course of
his professional duty, that his feelings were greatly
hurt by his exclusion from the festivities of Govern-
ment House, by the steward and butler, as it had a
tendency to lower him in the estimation of his ac-
quaintances ; and, if it had not been for the respect he
owed his Excellency, he would most assuredly have
horsewhipped them both.
LIFE IN A COLONY. ] 29
" ' Would you V said Sir John, who was exces-
sively amused at the pugnacious little man. ' Would
you ? By Jove ! then, I give you my leave. Horse-
whip them as long as you can stand over them.'
" ' This is the manner,' he observed, ' in which the
good people here censure me. It appears that I oc-
casionally omit to ask some person who thinks he is
entitled to a card as a matter of right. I really
thought, at first, the fellow was going to complain to
me of myself, for, in fact, he has just as good a right
to come as some others who are admitted.'
" So far, therefore, from a Government house exer-
cising a salutary influence on the community, its effects
are in fact injurious. People who go from the coun-
try, and procure, through their representatives, ad-
mission to the palace, when they return to their
homes, contrast the facility with which this honour
has been obtained, with the utter impossibility of being
introduced to the families of gentlemen in their own
neighbourhood, attribute the difference to pride or in-
justice, and naturally attempt to vindicate their rights,
by striving to reduce to their own level those who
maintain this invidious reserve. It is natural for
them to think, if the first officer in the colony — he
who represents his sovereign, is willing to admit that
there are no distinctions of stations, or to waive the
consideration, that it is neither right nor expedient
that subordinate people should maintain a different
course. It is, therefore, the prolific parent of that
G 5
130 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
respectable, as well as amiable aud attractive, virtue
known as ' Colonial Patriotism.''
" It is some years since I was at a ball at Govern-
ment House. My age and infirmities render them irk-
some to me, and, of course, unfit me for enjoying them.
The last time I was there, was during the adminis-
tration of Sir Hercules Sampson. I need not de-
scribe him, or his lady and daughter, or his two aides.
Lord Edward Dummkopf and the Honourable Mr.
Trotz, for, if I recollect aright, Barclay has done that
already, nmch better than I could, in his graphic
sketch of ' Asking a Governor to Dine.' It was on
the first day of January, there was a lev^e in the
morning, a dinner party in the afternoon, and a ball
in the evening. A custom prevailed then, and still
does, I believe, at Halifax, as well as elsewhere in
the country, for the gentlemen to call that day on all
the ladies of their acquaintance, who are expected to
be at home to receive visitors, to whom cake and wine
are ofiered. Of course, there is at every house a con-
stant succession of people, from mid-day till the hour
of dinner ; and, at the time I am speaking of, these
morniuir libations to the health of the fair sex in-
creased not a little towards afternoon the dilKculty,
that always exists in winter, in walking over the slip-
pery and dangerous streets of the town. Although
generally considered a \ery troublesome ceremony, it
is not without its beneficial eftects, inasmuch as it
induces or compels a renewal of relations that have
LIFE IN A COLONY. 131
suffered from neglect or misunderstanding during the
preceding year, and aff'ords a good opportunity for
reconciliation without the intervention of friends, or
the awkwardness of explanations. Indeed, it is this
consideration alone that has caused this rural practice
to survive the usages of the olden time.
" Many absurd anecdotes are in circulation relating
to the accidents and incidents of the ' New Year's
Calls,' among the drollest of which is the sudden
irruption into a house of the greater part of those
persons who had attended the Governor's levee, and
their equally sudden departure, amid shrieks of aff'right
and roars of laughter, as the cracking of the beams of
the floor gave notice of the impending danger of a
descent into the cellar, and the subsequent collective
mass of fashionables in one confused and inextricable
heap at the foot of the very icy steps of the hall
door. Ah, me ! those were days of hilarity and good
humour, before political strife had infused bitterness
and personality into everything. We were but too
happy before we became too free. The dinner was an
official one ; the guests were the various heads of de-
partments in the place ; and it passed off" much in the
same manner as similar ones do elsewhere.
" Of the ball, it is difficult to convey to you a very
distinct idea, such entertainments being so much ahke
everywhere. There may be more fashion and more
elegance in one assembly than another ; but, if the
company are well-bred people, the diff'erence is one of
132 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
appearance, and not of character ; and even when the
company is mixed and motleyed, as on the occasion I
am speaking of, still, when the greater part of them are
gentry, the difference between it and one more exclu-
sive, though perceptible to the eye well defined and
clearlv distinjjuishable, is one of colouring;; and if, in
delineating it, the shades are made too strong, it be-
comes a fancy sketch rather than a foithful picture,
and the actors appear in caricature, and not in natural
and faithful portraiture. To give you the proprieties
would be insipid, as all proprieties are, and to give
you only the absurdities would be to make them too
prominent, and lead you to suppose they were samples
of the whole, and not exceptions. You must bear
this in mind, therefore, or you will think the account
exaggerated, or the party more exceptionable than it
really was.
" When I first knew Government House, the so-
ciety to be met with there was always, as I have
before said, the best in the place. In time, each suc-
ceeding Governor enlarged the extent of his circle;
and, at last, as a corrective, two were formed for even-
ing entertainments : one that was selected for small
parties, and for frequent intercourse with the family ;
and a second, designed for public nights only and rare
occasions, and so arranged as to embrace all within,
as well as most people beyond, the limits of the other.
The effect of this arrangement was, to draw the two
classes apart, to create invidious distinctions, and to
LIFE IN A COLONY. 133
produce mutual dislike. Subsequently, the two have
been merged into one, which has consequently become
so diluted as to be excessively unpalatable. The best
part have lost their flavour, without imparting it to
others ; and the inferior, being coarser and stronger,
have imbued the rest with as much of their pecu-
liarities as to neutralize their effect, while they have
retained enough to be as disagreeable and repulsive
as ever,
" The evening to which I allude being a public
one, the invitations were very numerous, and embraced
the military, navy, and staff, the members of the legis-
lature, which was then in session, and all the civilians
whose names were to be found on the most extended
list that had been formed at the time. Having dined
at the palace that day, I happened to be present at
the arrivals. The guests were shown into the drawing-
room, and courteously, though ceremoniously, received
by the Governor, his lady, and staff. Those who
were wholly unknown, and the least acquainted with
the usages of society (as is always the case with awk-
ward people), arrived long before the rest, and were
not a little surprised and awed at finding themselves
alone in the presence of the ' royal party." The
ladies were unable or afraid to be at ease, or to ap-
pear at home, and sat on the edges of their chairs,
stiff, awkward, and confused. The utterance of the
gentlemen, who were no less conscious of being out of
their element, was thick, rapid, and unintelligible;
134 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
while they appeared to find hands and feet an intoler-
able nuisance. The former felt into every pocket of
their owners for a secure retreat, but were so restless,
they had hardly secreted themselves before they made
their escape into another hiding-place, when they put
a bold face on the matter, advanced and clasped
each other in agony in front, and then undertook the
laborious task of supporting the skirts of the coat
behind. The latter, like twin-brothers, entered the
room together, and stood on a footing of perfect equa-
lity ; but it was evident ambition was at work among
them, for the right first claimed precedence, and then
the left, and then rudely crossed before each other,
and, at last, as if ashamed of this ineftectual struggle,
when their master sat down, hid themselves under
the chair, or embraced each other lovingly on the
carpet.
" Lord Edward could not, and Trotz would not,
talk. Sir Hercules, with great good humour, tried
every topic ; but ho no sooner started one, than it fled
in afii'ight at the cold and repulsive monosyllable
' Yes,' or ' No," and escaped.
" ' How very icy the streets are !"' he said ; ' they
are really quite dangerous.''
" ' Very, sir.'
" ' Does your harbour freeze over V
" ' No, sir oh, yes, often, sir ! — that is, very
rarely — when the barber rises, sir....'
" ' Perhaps, madam, some of these prints would
LIFE IN A COLONY. 135
amuse you ! Here are some of the latest caricatures ;
they are capital....''
" ' No, thank you, Sir Hercules — not any, sir,'
" ' Are you fond of driving in a sleigh V
" ' Some, sir.'
" ' Do you play V
" ' I never touch cards, sir.'
" ' No, but upon the piano V
" ' No, but my Anna Maria does ; and master says
she has a most grand ear, sir.'
" ' Perhaps you would like to hear some music ? If
so. Lady Sampson will have great pleasure in playing
for you.'
" ' For me ! Oh, dear, no — not for the world ! I
couldn't think of it for me, sir.'
" ' What a pity it is there is no theatre at Halifax !'
" ' Yes, sir — very, sir — for them as sees no harm
in 'em, sir — yes, sir.'
" The Governor gave it up in despair, and offered
me a pinch of snuff, with an air of resignation that
would have done honour to a martyr. They were
afi-aid of him, and knew not how to address him ; and,
besides, who could talk amid general silence, and sub-
ject their chit-chat to the critical ordeal of strangers ?
" Announcements now became more frequent, and
relieved the embarrassment of both parties. Major
and Mrs. Section ; Mrs. and the Misses de Laine ;
the Hon. Mr. Flint (a privy councillor) ; Mr. Steel
(the Speaker), Mrs. and Miss Steel, and Miss Tinder ;
136 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
Colonel Lord Heather ; Vicc-Admiral Sir James Cap-
stan ; Lady Capstan ; Captain Sheet ; Lieutenant
Stay ; and so on. The room was soon filled, and it
was amusing to witness the eflect this reinforcen)ent
had on tlie spirits of the advanced party, who had
hitherto sustained, unaided and alone, the difficult
conversation, and to watch the eagerness with which
they recognised and claimed an acquaintance with
whom they could be at ease and talk freely. An in-
cipient attack of the gout compelling me to take a
chair, I sat down near the table on which were the
prints and caricatures, but soon became more interested
in the scene before me than in those over-drawn pic-
tures of life, and was excessively amused at the scraps
of conversation that reached me from detached groups
in my neighbourhood.
" ' Ah, Mrs. Section !' said Trotz, as he gave her,
very condescendingly, one finger, ' how do you do ?
And how is my friend, the major V
" • The major is poorly, thank you,' she replied ;
' he caught a bad cold in going those ''orrid grand
rounds last night."*
" ' Ah,"' said Trotz, ' ho should have had a four-
post bedstead put upon runners, and driven in that
manner to visit the posts! The orderly could have
accompanied him, turned out the guards for him, and,
when all was ready, opened the curtains.'
" ■• How very good !"" said Lord Edward.
" ' What a droll fellow Trotz is V observed the ladv
LIFE IN A COLONY. 137
to her neighbour : ' but those grand rounds really are
a great nuisance, and I get dreadfully frightened when
Section is out. Last night I wanted to have Sero-eant
Butter to sleep in the 'ouse ; but the major said,
' ""Enrietta, don't be foolish V So I put my maid Hann
in the dressing-room. Presently I 'eard a noise, and
called to Hann, and we examined every place — and
what do you think it was I an howl tapping against
the heaves of the 'ouse !'
" ' I am afraid,'' said the Admiral to his flag-captain,
' that Sampson will find himself in a scrape this winter.
I don't see how he is to get over the rupture of the
last session ; where it was tongued then, it has again
given way, I understand, and nothing holds it now but
the cheeks and back fish."*
" ' Dear me, Sir James,' said Mrs. Section, ' 'ow
very 'orrid ! do, pray, recommend to him 'Olloway's
'Ealino; Hointment — it's hexcellent! But what did
you say it was that 'ung by the Governor's cheeks V
" Their sense of the ludicrous overcame their sense
of propriety, and they both laughed heartily ; when
the Admiral said —
" ' Nothing, my dear madam — nothing in the world
but his whiskers !'
" Moving a little further ofi", their place was soon
supplied by another set, among whom was the pretty
Mrs. Smythe.
" ' Ah, Mrs. Section, how do you do to-night ? You
really look charmingly ! Let me introduce dear Mrs.
138 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
Olaverliouse to you! How glad I am to see you,
Miss Schweineimcr ! Wlicn did you come to town ?
Has your father taken liis scat in the council yet? —
Stop, my dear, there is nohody looking just now ;
your dress is unhooked at the top ; let me fasten it.
What a lovely complexion ! I would give the world
for such a colour as you have. I suppose you ride a
great deal a-horseback in the country V
" ' No, I never ride ; father hasn't a beast fit for the
side-saddle."*
" ' Call it a horse, dear ; we call nothing a beast in
Halifax, dear, but Colonel Lord Heather, who won't
allow his band to play at private parties. Do you
know Lady Capstan ? I will introduce you.'
" ' Oh, dear, no, not for the world, before so many
folks ! I shouldn't know whether I was standing on
my head or my heels, if you did.'
" ' Don't talk of standing on your head, dear ;
women never do it here, except at a circus.'
" ' It's allowable to have one's head turned a little
sometimes, though, ain't it V retorted the young lady.
' But who is that old fellow at the table V
" ' Don't call him a fellow, dear — fellows are only
found at colleges and workhouses : call him ' gentle-
man,' and leave the word ' old' out ; nobody is old
hero but the devil. It is Judge Sandford, dear. Shall
I introduce you? I think he knows your father.'
" ' Oh, no, pray don't ; he looks so horrid cross and
grumpy !'
LIFE IN A COLONY. 139
" ' Who is to be the new Legislative Councillor T
inquired a member of the Assembly of another.
" ' Morgan, I believe.'
" ' Morgan ! why, he can't write his name ! You
don't mean to say they intend to put in ]\Iorgan ?
Why, he ain't fit to be a doorkeeper — and, besides, his
character is none of the best, they say.'
" ' It will conciliate all the clergy of ....'
" ' Conciliate the devil ! Well, you do astonish me !
Did you get your vote through for the Shinimicash
Bridge V
" ' Yes.'
"'I wish you'd help me, then — log-roll mine
through, for an over-expenditure I have of five hundred
pounds.'
" ' I will, if you will support the academy in my
county. I was put in on that interest.'
" ' Done !' and the parties shook hands, and sepa-
rated.
" As they turned to depart, one of them struck his
elbow against a musical instrument, that gave out a
loud and long-continued sound.
" ' What's that !' he asked.
" ' They call it a harp,' was the reply.
" ' The devil it is 1 I wonder if it is like the harp
of Solomon !'
" ' I never heard of Solomon's harp.'
" ' Well, it's much of a muchness, then, for I never
saw it ; so we are about even, T guess.'
140 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
" ' I say, ]3ill, that's a devili.sli pretty craft witli a
rainbow on her catheads, ain't she i — there, that one
\\-ith pink streamers and long-legged gloves,"" said one
little middy to another. ' Fm blowed if I don't go
and ask her to dance with me !'
" ' ^Vhy, Black, what are you at, man ! You
haven't been introduced to her.'
" ' The uniform's introduction enough to her ; there's
no harm in trying it, at any rate. So I'm ofl" in chase
of the strange sail, and will speak her, at all events.'
" ' How was dry cod at Berbice V inquired a little,
cold, calculating man, of anotiier (who, from his enor-
mous bulk, appeared to have fed upon something much
better than his favourite export) — ' how was cod, when
tlie brig Polly left Berbice ? And lumber — was the
market good? What a grand government contract
Longhead got for the supply of the army and navy !
Tiiat fellow don't entertain the commissary people for
nothing; that's a fact! There's no use to tender
where he's concerned.'
" ' How late the officers of the 10th are in coming
to-night !' whispered a very pretty young lady to her
companion. ' There is nothing but those horrid
black coats here, and they look like ill-omened birds.
I can't bear them ; they take up so nmch room, and, I
fancy, soil my gloves.'
" ' I can't say I have any objection to them,' said
the other ; ' but I wish they were not so fond of
dancing. But just look at Ann Cooper, what a witch
LIFE IN A COLONY. 141
she has made of herself; she actually looks like
a fright ! I ■wonder what Captain Denham can
see in her to admire ! Come this way : there is
that horrid Lawyer Galbanum seeking whom he
can devour, for the next quadrille : I shall say I am
engaged."'
" ' So shall I, for I have no idea of fisrurins: with
him. Look at Major Mitchell, how he is paying
court to Lady Sampson ! They say he is attentive
to ]\Iiss Sampson. They are moving this way; let
us go over to Mrs. Section, she always has so many
people about her that one knows.""
" ' What a magnificent screen \' exclaimed Major
Mitchell to the great enchantress. Lady Sampson.
' How beautifullv it is executed ! It is the most ex-
quisite piece of embroidery I ever saw. I am at a loss
which most to admire, — the brilliancy of the colouring
and delicate shading, or the skilful way in which it is
worked in ; for it has a richer and softer effect than
anything of the kind I ever beheld. Where in the
world did you get it V
" ' I hardly like to tell you, after such extravagant
praise ; but it is the joint production of myself and
daughter. One has to resort to some such occupation
to pass the time in this horrid country ; and,"* looking
round cautiously, and lowering her voice, ' among
such horrid carriboos of people, too.""
" ' Exactly,"" said the major ; ' I know how to pity
you.'
142 THE OLD JUDGE J OU,
" ' When I \vas in the West Indies, I used to
amuse myself by embroidering by way of killing time.
The weather was so extremely hot, it was impossible
to use any exercise.'
" ' Got this place made a free port, you see, Sir
Hercules,'' said a man, who appeared to have had an
interview on some occasion at the Colonial and Home
Office. ' I told the Secretary of State refusal was out
of the question, we nmst have it ; and threatened to
have a committee moved for on it in the House of
Commons, — regularly bullied him out of it. The
Chancellor of the Exchequer, who is a particular friend
of mine, told me before I went it was the only way at
Downing' Street. Bully them, says he, and you'll
get it. Jiut Peel, he said, was a different man : self-
created — a new man — important — feels himself —
stands before the fire with his back to it, and his
hands in his pockets. He knows who he is, and so
must you appear to know. I took the hint, pitched
into him about the confidence of the colonies iu his
great grasp of intellect, comprehensive mind, and so
on. Don't say another word, my good fellow, it
shall be done. / say it, you know, and that's enough.
I had a conversation with John llussell, too; and,
between you and me, they tell me his Lordship is a
rising man. Plumbstone, said he, Halifax is a
very important jilace, — a very important place indeed.
I really had no idea of it until you explained to me its
capabilities ; and then, tapping me on the shoulder.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 143
he said, and it has some very important men in it,
too! — a handsome compHment, wasn't it? And
then he quoted some Latin ; but I've grown so rusty —
hem ! — so long since I've had time — hem ! — I couldn't
follow him.'
" ' Stop a minute, Sarah ; let me pull out your
flounce, and fix your sleeves and braids for you,' said
an anxious mother to her daughter. ' There, now,
that will do ; but hold yourself up, dear. In a ball-
room, people look shorter than they are, and must
make the most of themselves ; and don't dance with
those horrid little midshipmen, if you can find any
other partners.'
" ' Why, ma V
" ' Exactly,' said Mrs. Smythe, who appeared to
be endowed with ubiquity, ' your mother is right.
Do you know Captain Beech, or Lieutenant Birch, of
the Jupiter ? I will introduce them to you ; they are
both well connected, and have capital interest. Take
my arm, but don't look at those country members,
dear, and then you won't have to cut them, for Sir
Hercules don't like that. Appear not to see them,
that's the most civil way of avoiding them. Recollect,
too, that walls have ears — especially when they are
covered with flowers, as they will be to-night. Now,
I'll tell you a secret, dear ; Major Macassar is engaged
in England, so don't waste your time in talking to
him this evening. Keep close to me, now, and I'll
take you among the right set, and introduce you to
144 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
good partners, for I sec preparations making for
moving out/
"Here Sir Hercules gave liis arm to Lady Cap-
stan, Lord Heather following witli Lady Sampson,
and led the way to the ball-room. It was a larixc and
handsome apartment, tastefully decorated and well
lighted ; and the eftect produced hy the rich and
various uniforms of the military and navy was gay,
and even brilliant — more so, indeed, than is generally
seen in a provincial town in England ; for the garri-
son consisted of three regiments, and the greater part
of the fleet upon the station was in port at the time.
At the upper end of the room were the Governor,
Lady Sampson, the Admiral and his lady, and the
heads of the civil and military departments of the
place and their families. Those next in rank adorned
the sides of the room ; and groups of those who made
no pretension to that equivocal word ' position ' occu-
pied and filled the lower end.
*' The indiscriminate hospitality that had thus
assembled together people of the same community,
wholly unknown to each other except by name, liad
the etlect of causing a restraint in the manner of the
upper class, in a vain and weak desire not to be
thought on a footing of equality with those beneath
them ; and, on the other side, a feeling that this
diftercnce was purposely rendered palpable, and main-
tained, if not with incivility, at least, with a total
want of courtesv. Where such was the condition of
LIFE IN A COLONY. 145
things, the whole naturally suffered from the conduct
of a few individuals ; and those who exhibited or
assumed airs of superiority, on the one part, or re-
sented them coarsely, on the other, naturally involved
the right-thinking people of both in the censure that
belonged peculiarly to themselves.
" ' Who is that beautiful girl V asked a person near
me, of a lady belonging to the place.
" ' I don't know her.""
" ' And that extremely interesting young lady V
" ' I am not aware; I never met her before ; she
is not of our set."*
" And yet it was manifest she knew her name;
had seen her frequently, though not, perhaps, in the
same room ; and was well acquainted with the condi-
tion and respectable character of her parents. If any
allowance could be made for this absurd fastidious-
ness, some extenuation might be found for female
vanity in the fact, that what the lower end of the
room lost in station was more than compensated for in
beauty. Trotz, who had observed this littleness, did
not fail to use it, to the annoyance of those who had
been weak enough to exhibit it. He affected oreat
astonishment at their not knowing people so di.stin-
guished for beauty, ease of manner, and agreeable con-
versation. The lower they were in the scale of society,
the more he extolled them for these qualities, and
pronounced them decidedly the finest women in the
country.
VOL. I. H
146 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
" In a short time, the quadrilles were formed, and
all (that is, all the younger part of the company) were
in motion ; and, whatever the undercurrents and un-
seen eddies of feeling might have been, all appeared
gav and happy. Indeed, some of the young ladies
from the country danced with a vigour and energy
that showed their whole hearts were engaged in dis-
playing what they considered most valuable qualities,
exertion and endurance. The eflfect of the sudden
cessation of music in a ball-room is always ludicrous,
as the noise compels people to talk louder than usual ;
and, when it terminates, the conversation is continued
for awhile in the same key.
'• ' My heart is as free as the eagle, sir,' were the
first words I heard from a fair promenader.
" ' Father is shocked at a waltz. I must wait till
he goes into supper.'
'' ' Ma says she's a sheep in lamb's clothing ; she
rioollects her forty years ago, dancing with a boy, as
she is to-night.'
" ' I say, Bill, look at the old ladies a-starboard
there, how they haul in their claws, like lobsters, when
the promenading commences !'
" ' Hush, there's Captain Sheet !'
" ' I hope he's not in the wind ! AVho is that he
has got in tow? She looks like a heavy sailor.'
" ' Hush, he'll hear you !'
" ' It's a great shame, now, to wear spurs in a ball-
room ! Major Macassar has torn my dress, and
LIFE IN A COLONY. 147
scraped my ankle dreadfully. I'm really quite lame.
The gold wire, too, has made my neck smart as if it
was stung with nettles.""
" ' Well, if it's any satisfaction to retaliate, you
have certainly punished that Highland officer nicely,
for the beetle-wing trimming on your dress has scratched
his knees most unmercifully ! But, oh, Sarah ! look
at Captain Denham ! if his epaulette hasn't drawn off
a false curl, and there he carries it suspended from his
shoulder as a trophy ! Well, I never ! He needn't
think it will ever be claimed ! I wonder who in the
world it belongs to? How glad I am it isn't the
colour of my hair !'
" ' Oh, sir, if you haven't seen Carriboo Island, sir,
near Pictoo, you haven't seen the prettiest part of
Nova Scotia ! I never beheld anything so lovely as
Carriboo Island. We have such pleasant clam-parties
there, sir, especially when the timber- vessels arrive.'
" Lady Sampson had but one topic, which, though
it had lasted since October, was likely to endure
through the winter season. She had visited the Falls
of Niao-ara in the autumn, and was filled with wonder
and amazement. She was now describing them to a
circle of admiring friends.
" ' It was a mighty cataract !' she said.
" ' It might be removed by couching,' remarked a
deaf staff-doctor, who thought she was talking of her
eyes, which greatly distended at the time with the
marvellous story.
H 2
148 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
" ' The Falls !' she said, raising her voice.
" ' Ah ! the effect of a fall — that will renckT the
operation doubtful."'
" ' Water-foil !'
" ' Ah, exactly ; the lachrj-mal gland is affected.""
"■ ' Ni-as-a-ra !' she said, raising her voice still
hi"-her, and pronouncing the word slowly.
" ' I beg your pardon, madam,"' he replied,
putting his hand to his ear, and advancing his
head much nearer ; ' I beg your pardon, but I didn't
hear.'
" ' Trotz ! do, pray, take that horrid man away,
and explain to him,"' said the lady, and then con-
tinued. ' I saw the pool at the foot of the rock where
the Indian warrior rose after going over the Fall, and
was whirled round and round in the vortex for a
great many days, in an upright position, as if he
were still alive ! They say it was a fearful sight ; at
last, the flesh dissolved, and the frame parted and
sunk !""
" She then led the way to the drawing-room, to
show a sketch of Niagara, that the military secretary
had prepared for her. Trotz detained the doctor a
minute behind, and I heard him say, —
" ' Though the cataract was not, that story of the
Indian really was, all in my eye."*
" ' So I should think,' was the reply.
'• The ante-rooms through which we passed were
filled with persons playing cards, or taking refresh-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 149
ments. At a small table sat my friend, the midship-
man, with the little strange sail with pink streamers,
to whom he had given chase in the early part of the
evening, and, as he said, brought to. They were just
commencing a sociable game of chess.
" ' Suppose,' said the jolly tar to his fair friend
— ' suppose that we strip as we go ? It's great
fun.'
" ' I don't understand you,' said the young lady,
with an offended toss of her pretty head.
" ' What ! not know what strip as we go is V
" ' I don't know what you mean, sir !'
" ' Why, this is the rule. Any thing you can
take, you are boujid to take, and strip the board as
you go on. It shortens the game amazingly.'
" Lady Sampson now opened a large book, contain-
ing the promised sketch, and unfolded and extended
out a narrow strip of paper of immense length, painted
o-reen, and resemblino; an enormous snake, and ex-
plained it all in detail.
" ' There is the Gulf of St. Lawrence,' she said ;
' and there's Quebec ; and there's Montreal ; and
there are the lakes ; and there— just there — no, not
there— a little higher up— just between your thumb
and finger — is Niagara, — vast, mighty and grand
Niagara ! Don't you see the grand Falls, Mr. Sec-
tion ? There, that little white speck — that's it ! It's
so mighty, that neither the eye nor the mind can take
it all in at once ! Captain Howard drew it ! Ain't it
150 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
beautifully done ? He draws so well ! He can draw
any thing V
" ' I must introduce liim to you,' whispered Mrs.
Snij'tho to Miss Schweineimer.
" ' Yes/ said Trotz to Lord Edward, ' he can draw
any thing, — a long bow, a long cork — any thing but a
bill, and that he won't draw for any one !'
" ' How very good !' replied Lord Edward.
'"'■ ' Here is an epitome of it — an abridgment — the
ideas, as it were, itself, though not developed ;' and
she exhibited a very good and accurate sketch taken
by her daughter, infinitely better done, and more intel-
ligible, than the other. ' What do you think, Mrs.
Smvthe, of my transferring this to embroidery —
working it for a screen, or a cushion ? No, a cushion
wouldn't do, either; it's inconvenient to have to rise
every time you wish to show it. But for a screen^
ehr
"• Another party, an exploring one, that was recon-
noitering what was going on in the drawing-room, now
arrived ; and the loud prolonged sound of Niagam
^vas again heard in the distance, amidst the confused
hum of many voices, as 1 returned to the ball-room.
The dancing being about to be resumed, I took a seat
near a Mrs. Blair, an old lady who came for the pur-
pose of chaperoning her daughter that evening. I had
known her in her youth, but had not met her of late
years, and was shocked to see the change that time
liad effected both in her appearance and disposition.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 151
The playful humour, for which she was remarkable
when young, had degenerated into severe sarcasm ;
the effects, probably, of ill health, or of decreased
fortune,
" ' Who would have thought of seeing you here.
Judge ?"* said she.
" ' The truth is, my dear Mrs. Blair,' I replied, ' 1
have not been at a ball for many years, and probably
never shall be again ; and, as I dined here to-day, and
was in the house when the company arrived, I thought
I would stay and take one last long look at a scene which
recalls so many recollections of bygone days; and,
besides, it always does me good to see happy faces
about me.'
" ' Happiness in a ball-room !' she ejaculated, with
some bitterness of feeling ; ' I thought you were too
much of a philosopher, to believe in such a deception !
Look at that old wall-eyed colonel, now (excuse the
coarseness of the expression, but I have no patience
with people of his age forgetting their years), — look at
that wall-eyed colonel, with an obliquity of vision, and
the map of Europe traced in red stains on his face !
Happy fellow, is he not ? See, he is actually going to
dance ! It will puzzle those two sisters to know which
he is addressing."*
" She had scarcely uttered the words, when both
the young ladies rose at once, each thinking he had
asked for the honour of her hand.
" ' How happy he must feel,'' she continued, ' in
lo2 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
havinoj such an ocular proof of the want of unity or ex-
pression in his eyes ! Oh ! look at that old lady,
with a flame-coloured satin dress, and an enormous
bag hanging on her arm, with tulips embroidered on
it, and a strange-looking cap, with a bell-rope attached
to one side of it, fanning a prodigious bouquet of
flowers in her belt, as if to keep them from fainting
with the heat, and losing their colour ! Oh, observe
that member woman, that lady from the rural dis-
tricts, habited in a gaudy-coloured striped silk dress,
trimmed all over with little pink bows, having yellow
glass buttons in the centre ; a cap without a back,
stuffed full of feathers, like Cinderella''s godmother ;
and enormously long gloves, full of wrinkles, like the
skin of an elephant ! They are both happy, but it is
the happiness of fools ! Happiness in a ball-room .'
Ah, Judge, you and I are too old for such twaddle !
I wish you had been here when the yellow-fever was
raging ! In a garrison town, the young ladies liave
the scarlet-fever all the year round ; but last year the
yellow-fever predominated ; for, you know, two dis-
eases cannot exist in the constitution at one time. At
a sale of wrecked ffoods, a fashionable milliner bou<rht
a lot of maize-coloured satins so cheap, as to be able to
sell them for a mere trifle ; but disposed of them
skilfully, by exhibiting only a few at a time. The
consequence was, a great number of young ladies made
their appearance here in what each one considered a
rare fabric ; and, to their horror, found the room full
LIFE IN A COLONY. 153
of them ! I christened it then, and it has ever since
been known as the bilious ball. Do you suppose
those maize-coloured satins covered happy hearts that
night ? There is Ella M'Nair, now, dancing with her
awkward country cousin, whom she is afraid to refuse,
yet unwilling to accept, as a partner, alarmed for the
horror of Lord Heather, the sneers of Trotz, and the
triumph of the Shermans. Sweet girl ! how joyous
she looks, does she not ? Oh, look at that supercilious
little fellow near the fireplace, whose elbow is resting
on the mantelpiece ! The education his foolish father
gave him spoiled him for the kitchen, without fitting
him for the parlour. Instead of being a cheerful,
thrifty tradesman, he has been metamorphosed into a
poor, shabby, discontented gentleman. He looks like
a grasshopper on half-pay.
" ' You see the same thing every where. Observe
that very pretty and remarkably well-dressed lady op-
posite. She is a widow of large fortune and good con-
nexions. Her affections are all absorbed by that lout
of a boy she is talking to, who is her only child. His
bent knees and stooping shoulders give you the idea of
a ploughboy, while his fashionable dress would lead
you to suppose he had clothed himself, by fraud or
mistake, from his master's wardrobe. She is beseech-
ing him to stand properly, and behave like a gentle-
man ; and, above all, to dance ; to all which he is
becoming more and more rebellious ; and now he has
jerked away his arm, and is diving into that croAvd of
h5
\oi THE OLD JUDGE; OR.
men near the fire, to escape from hor importanities
and tlie observation of others. Her wealth and station
have given hor but little happiness, and her maternal
cares and devoted aftection are the torment of her son.
Did you use that word happiness, therefore, Judge,
as a connnon-place phrase, or did it express what you
really meant V
" • I meant what I said,' I replied. ' Happiness is
rather a negative than positive term in this world, and
consists more in the absence of some things than in
the presence of others. I see no harm in assemblies
where they are not the business, but the relaxation of
life, as they certainly are in this country. People
come together for the purpose of pleasing and being
pleased, of seeing and being seen, to be amused them-
selves, and to contribute their share to the amusement
of others. They come with a disposition and a hope
to be happy. Music and dancing exhilarate the spirits,
hilarity is contagious, and, generally speaking, people
do enjoy themselves, and I derive great gratification
in witnessing their happiness. That was what I meant,
for I never supposed there could be an assemblage of
two or three hundred people, without there being some
individuals unable or unwilling to partake of tho gaiety
about them.'
" Just then Miss Schweineimer, the young lady
that called her horse a beast, and myself an ugly old
fellow, passed, hanging on the arm of a subaltern
otHcer, iuto whose face she was looking up with evi-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 155
dent satisfaction, while listening to his flattering ac-
cents.
" ' Oh, charming !' she said. ' If I haven't enjoyed
myself to-night, it's a pity, thafs all ! How do you
feel ? I feel kind of all over. It's the handsomest
party I ever saw in all my life ! How I like Halifax !
I wish father lived here instead of the Blueberry
Plains !'
" ' There, madam,** I said, ' let us abide by the de-
cision of that unsophisticated girl. I forgive her nasal
twang and her ignorance, for the simplicity and truth-
fulness of her nature ;' and I effected my escape from
my cynical companion.
" Conversation such as hers is depressing to the
spirits, and lowers one's estimate of mankind. It puts
you out of sorts ; for such is the mysterious effect of
sympathy, that a discontented person soon infuses a
portion of his own feeling into the mind of his audi-
tors. I did not, however, derive much benefit from
change of place, for the gentleman who next accosted
me was imbued with much of the same captious spirit.
" ' I have been pitying you for some time. Judge,'
he said. ' How could you think of remaining so long
with that bitter specimen of humanity, Mrs. Blair ?
She speaks well of no one, and has been amusing her-
self by feeling the silks and satins of her neighbours
this evening, so as to find fault with their texture, if
thin, and the extravagance of their owners, if other-
wise. She has been grumbling to every one that the
15G THE OLD JUn(;R; OR,
room is so badly lighted, good dresses are lost in the
dim and gloomy apartment. I shall propose to Sir
Hercules to have shelves put up on the wall for those
old chaperons, with chandeliers in front of them to
show off their velvets to the best advantage ; when
they will be out of all danger themselves from heels
and spurs, and be deprived of the power of annoying
others. Capital idea, isn't it ? A very vulgar party
this, Judge? When the guests that are invited do
come, it's not fair to send to the highways and byways
for others. In the olden time, we are told, it was only
when a man's friends declined, that a press-warrant
issued to man the tables with the first poor devils that
could be found going to bed supperless.'
" The party now began to move towards the supper-
room, which generally presents more attractions to
persons who stand less in need of refreshments than
those who have been fatigued or exhausted with dancing.
The tables were tastefully and beautifully arranged;
but the effect was much injured by the profuse and
substantial character of some of the viands, which the
number and quality of the guests rendered necessary.
Whatever doubt there might have been as to the pos-
sibility of a ball conferring happiness, there could be
none as to the enjoj-^ment derived from the supper. In
approving or partaking, nearly all seemed to join ;
few claimed exemption from age, and no one objected
to a vis-d-vis; and, if some had danced with all their
hearts, an infinitely greater number eat and drank
LIFE IN A COLONY. 157
with as much relish as if eating and drinking were as
unusual a thing as waltzing.
" I looked, but in vain, for my cynical companion,
Mrs. Blair, to draw her attention to my friend, the
midshipman, who had evidently made a prize of the
strange sail, and was behaving with the utmost gene-
rosity and kindness to the vanquished. He insisted
upon filling her plate with every thing within reach ;
and when it could hold no more, surrounded it with
tenders, deeply laden mth every variety of supply.
Nor did he forget champagne, in which he drank to
the fair one's health, to their better acquaintance, and
to a short cruise and speedy return ; and then, pro-
testing it was all a mistake to suppose he had already
done so, apologized for his neglect, and repeated the
draughts till his eyes sparkled as bright as the wine.
He cut the large cake before him, and helped his
partner to a liberal share, complaining all the time that
the knife was desperately dull ; that it was the severest
cutting-out service he was ever employed in ; and
vowed that the steward ouo;ht to have three dozen for
his carelessness. He succeeded, however, at last in
effecting the incision, and brought away several folds
of a three-cornered piece of napkin, exactly fitting the
slice, which had impeded the progress of his knife.
As he deposited this trophy of his skill and strength
on the plate, he said, in an under tone, ' It only
wanted a ring to make it complete ;' whereat the lady's
face was suffused with blushes and smiles, and, holdin""
158 THE OLD JUDGE; OR.
up her glass, she said, ' A very little wine, if you
please/ Complying with this request, and filling his
own, they pledged each other again ; and something
was looked, and something was thought, and something
was felt, though not expressed on that occasion, that,
notwithstanding Mrs. Blair's theory to the contrary,
looked to me uncommonly like happiness.
" Miss Schweineimer was no less pleased, though
she thought that the sandwiches were rather bitey ;
and the little red things in the pickles, to which Trotz
had helped her, the hottest, not to be a fire, she had
ever tasted, for they burned her tongue so as to make
tears trickle down her cheeks.
" ' Do look !' said a young lady near mo to Mrs.
Smythe — ' do look at that strange creature covered
with pink bows, and yellow glass buttons in them ;
she is actually eating her supper backwards ! She be-
gan with fruits, and then proceeded to confectionary
and jellies, and so on, and is now winding up with the
breast and leg of a turkey ! Who is she, and where
does she come from V
" ' Her name is Whetstone ; I will introduce you
to her, by and by."
" ' No, thank you ; Td rather not.'
" ' Tlie place is unpronounceable. It is Scissiboo-
goomish-cogomah, an Indian word, signifying The
Witch's Fountain.'
" ' Ah, indeed ! she is a fit representative.""
LIFE IN A COLONY. 159
" The inventor of shelves for the chaperons now
accosted me again.
" ' I shoukl have Hked, Judge, to have had the
pleasure of taking wine with you, but really Sampson'^s
wine is not fit to drink ; he seems to have lowered his
standard of taste to suit the majority of his guests.
Did you ever see any thing so disgusting as the quan-
tities of things with which the tables are loaded, or
the gross appetites with which they were devoured ?
It is something quite shocking ! He is ruining the
state of society here. These people realize our ideas
of the harpies : —
Diripuuntque dapes, contactuque omnia fcedant
In mundo.
By the way, a little man, with a face like a squeezed
lemon, has done me the honour to notice me once or
twice to-night, with a half familiar and half obsequious
nod, whom I have been at a loss to make out. The
supper-table has betrayed him at last ; for its resem-
blance to his own counter, (for he keeps a confectionary-
shop in the country) put him at ease in a moment.
He is the most useful person here."*
" A message fi-om Sir Hercules to his aide, Mr.
Trotz, brought him to his feet, muttering, as he rose,
his discontent in very audible tones. The renewal of
the music in the ball-room at the same time intimated
that the last dance was about to be commenced.
" ' You ain't going, Mr. Trotz, are you V said Miss
IfiO THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
Schweincimor, who had unconsciously been the object
of many ini[)ertiuont remarks (hiring the hist half
hour. ' Pray try one of those custards before you go ;
they are so good ! Do, just to please me. You know
I ate those fiery pickles, because you asked me ;' and
she handed him a liquid one, contained in a small
circular Mass.
" To the astonishment of every body, he complied
with her request ; but, being in a hurry to attend to
the Governor's wishes, drank it off without the aid of
a spoon, and replaced the glass on the table. In a
moment he became dreadfully pale, and, putting his
liandkerchief to his face, exclaimed —
" ' Good heavens, the mustard-pot !"' and left the
room in convulsive agony from the effects of this
powerful emetic, and disappeared amid the malicious
laughter and uproarious delight of all those whom he
had at one time or another annoyed by his insolence.
" ' Well, I never !' said the young lady : ' it looks
as like a custard-glass as two peas, don't it ? and it's
the identical colour, too ? I am sorry it's done ; but
rd rather it had hai)pened to him than any one else ;
for I believe in my soul he gave me the red hot pickles
a-purpose. I am up sides with him, at any rate.'
'-' ' So would I, my dear,' said Mrs. Sm ythe ; ' but
don't say so ; here, you nmst always appear to be
sorry for an accident. Let me introduce you to Mr.
Able, assistant-surgeon of the Jupiter ; for this is the
last dance, and he'll tell you where the red pickles
LIFE IN A COLONY. 161
grow. I really love you, for putting that trick upon
that horrid Trotz.'
" ' I assure you it was a mistake....'
" ' That''s right, dear; look innocent, and say it was
a mistake.'
" 'But I assure you....'
" ' Oh, of course ! you really do it very well. You
are a capital scholar !'
" The last dance lasted for a long time ; for the
termination of every thing agreeable is always deferred
to the utmost moment of time. At lenfrth the band
played ' God save the King !' which was the signal
for parting, and the company took leave and disap-
peared in a few minutes, with the exception of the
awkward squad that first arrived. Owing to their
having made a mistake in the hour, or forgotten to
give orders as to the time their carriages were to come
for them, they were again doomed to annoy the guber-
natorial party, and to be no less perplexed and bored
themselves.
" Such were my last reminiscences of Government
House ; and, from what I hear, it has not at all im-
proved of late years. Don't let me be misunderstood,
however. I do not give you this as a sketch of society
at Halifax, but of a promiscuous ball at Government
House: nor are the people whom I have described
samples of the whole company; but some of them are
specimens of that part of it who ought never to have
been there."
1G2 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
CHAPTER VI.
THE OLD ADMIRAL AND THE OLD GENERAL.
The quiet inn in which I have been doniicileJ ever
since I arrived at Illinoo was yesterday the scene of
the greatest disorder and confusion. Shortly after
breakfast, a party of midshipmen, mounted on horse-
back, dashed into the courtyard during a violent
thunderstorm, with the speed and clatter of a charge
of cavalry. The merry crew at once dispersed tliem-
selves over every part of the house, which rang with
tlicir loud and long-continued peals of laughter. Their
number was soon increased by the addition of three or
four young women, who joined in their play with equal
noise and delight, chasing their tormentors, or flying
in affright at their rudeness, or quietly enjoying with
them a game of leapfrog in the passages.
My landlady, Mrs. Smith, was in despair. All her
remonstrances were met either with the response that
she was a beauty without paint, an angel, a cherub,
and a divine creature, or an invitation to join in their
sport. An officer's wife, who was awaiting the arrival
of her husband from Fredericton, was so alarmed and
LIFE IN A COLONY. 163
anuoyed at the indecent behaviour of the juvenile
party, that she summoned the hostess, and announced
her intention of immediately leaving the house.
" I am shocked and frightened beyond measure,''"'
she said, " at your permitting those young gentlemen
to make such a riot ; but, more than all, am I hor-
rified at the behaviour of your housemaids, who are
the most forward, romping, and shameless young
women I ever beheld. I just now rang my bell,
which was answered by the one who calls herself
Charlotte, the pretty girl vnih the curly head of golden
hair. ' Fasten my dress,"" said I. ' Yes, ma'am,"" she
replied ; and before I knew what she was about, or
could find words to express my surprise, my stays were
nearly undone, and my clothes unfastened. ' Oh !
I beg your pardon, ma"'am,"' she said, on being repri-
manded for the mistake ; ' I thought you said unrig.
ril reave it up in a minute."" When this was efiected,
she said, ' I'm blowed if I can find the hooks ! are
they on the larboard or starboard side V — ' Don""t use
those dreadful words,"" I replied : ' you have learned
them from those rude young midshipmen, who appear
to have turned your head. Take care of yourself ; for
they are reckless creatures — here to-day, and gone to-
morrow, and do not care what they say or do."" What
do you think, ]\Irs. Smith, was the reply of that bold,
impudent creature ? I could scarcely believe my ears.
' Oh, ma'am,"" she said, ' they are such nice young
gentlemen, and so handsome, too, a body can't refuse
164 THE OLD JLDGE; OR,
tliem any thing ; and, besides, I don't see any great
harm in kissing. If you were to try....' — ' Leave my
presence directly,"' I said ; ' how dare you address me
in that manner! Where is your mistress?** — 'Up
aloft, ma'am."' ' Aloft again ! poor lost creature, dead
to all sense of shame, whatever ; I pity you, from the
bottom of my heart. Send j^our mistress to me.""
Now, Mrs. Smith, I have never been so vexed and
insulted in my life, and I have sent for you to inform
you I shall remove to another inn."'"'
My poor unoffending landlady excused herself as
well as she was able for an occurrence which she could
neither foresee nor control. She said she was happy
to say, for the credit of her household, that she had
no such maid as Charlotte, nor one'female in her esta-
blishment that would think of acting or talking as she
had done. That that person must been the Honour-
able Mr. Hawson, who, with two others, borrowed
female attire, while their own was drying at the fire,
as thoy had no clothes with them but what they had
on when they arrived ; and that the romping girls who
played leapfrog were, in fact, no other than midship-
men. She added, that nothing of the kind could occur
again, as they had just set out on their return to
Halifax ; and she hoped that nobody would be ridden
over or killed, for they started at full gallop, waving
their caps and cheering each other as they went.
The Judge was a good deal amused at the story,
and laughed heartily over it.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 165
" I am a good sailor,"" he said, " and fond of the
sea, and so well acquainted with the manly bearing
and noble qualities of our seamen, that I make every
allowance for the irrepressible delight and inexhaus-
tible fun and frolic of these youngsters, when just
landed from a cruise. Whatever croakers may say
about the condition of the navy, it is in as efficient a
state as ever it was, and, when occasion requires, will
give as good an account of itself. The Lieutenants
are, in my opinion, as a class, in reference to their
numbers, the most active, intelligent, and valuable
body of men to be found in any branch of public ser-
vice in any country in the world. In former years, I
used to see a great deal of the navy, but, alas ! all my
old friends are now either superannuated or dead.
" During the war, when the whole fleet of one hun-
di'ed sail rendezvoused at Halifax, such scenes as you
have described were of constant occurrence, and the
to\vn was daily amused or disturbed by pranks of the
sailors. I remember one piece of absurdity that occa-
sioned a good deal of laughter at the time. At the
period I am speaking of, before the expensive under-
ground reservoirs were cut out of the rock on which
the town stands, the streets were sometimes rendered
almost impassable, from standing pools of water. A
sailor, seeing a lady contemplating in despair one of
these lagoons, took her up most gallantly in his arms,
and, wading through it, safely deposited her on the
other side. Alarmed at the suddenness of the trans-
166 THE OLD Jl'DGE; OR,
portation, she scolded her escort, in no measured
tenijs, for the liberty he had taken, when lie mounted
her aaain on liis shoulders, and, carrvinij her back,
replaced her where he had found her, humbly begging
pardon, and hoping he had rectified his error.
" The story of the man who laid a drunken ship-
mate at the feet of Captain Coffin., saying, ' Here's a
dead man for you !' was one that that eccentric officer
was always very fond of relating, as illustrative of the
humour of poor Jack.
" Nova Scotia was then the principal naval station
on this side of the Atlantic, but now shares that
honour with Bermuda; the Admiral residing in the
summer at the former, and during the winter months
at the latter place. The noble harbour of Halifax is
one of the best, perhaps, in the world : its contiguity
to Canada and the United States, its accessibility at
all seasons of the year, and its proximity to England,
(being the most Eastern part of this continent) give it
a decided advantage over its rival ; while the frightful
destruction of stores at Bermuda, from the ett'ects of the
climate, its insalubrity, and the dangers with which it
is beset, have never failed to excite astonishment at the
want of judgment shown in its selection, and the utter
disregard of expense with which it has been attended.
The dockyard at Halifax is a beautiful establishment,
in excellent order, and perfect of its kind, with the sin-
gular exception of not having the accommodation of a
dock from which it derives its name. This deficiencv
LIFE IN A COLONY. 167
was severely felt during the late war, and even in these
peaceable times is a source of great inconvenience, ex-
pense, and delay. The arrival of the Admiral, in the
spring, is always looked forward to with anxiety and
pleasure, as it at once enlivens and benefits the town.
Those common demonstrations of respect, salutes, pro-
claim the event, which is soon followed by the equally
harmless and no less noisy revels of sailors, who give
vent to their happiness in uproarious merriment. The
Admiral is always popular with the townspeople, as he
often renders them essential services, and seldom or
never com.es into collision with them. He is inde-
pendent of them, and wholly disconnected with the
civil government. ' Lucky fellow V as Sir Hercules
Sampson, the Governor, once said ; ' he has no turbu-
lent House of Assembly to plague him.'
" On an eminence immediately above the dockyard
is the ofiicial residence, a heavy, square, stone build-
ing, surrounded by massive walls, and resembling, in
its solidity and security, a public asylum. The en-
trance is guarded by two sentinels, belonging to that
gallant and valuable corps, the marines, who combine
the activity of the sailor with the steadiness and disci-
pline of the soldier, forming a happy mixture of the
best qualities of both, and bearing very little resem-
blance to either. ' These amphibious troops,** my old
friend. Sir James Capstan, used to say, 'are very
much in the way on board of a ship, except in an
action, and then they are always in the right place.'
168 TilK OLD JUDGE; OR,
" This was no mean praise for a man who thoroiiirhly
detested them, for an insult his dignity once suti'ered
from them, which he never forgot or forgave. Upon
one occasion, I attended divine service with him, on
board of liis magnificent flag-ship, the Graball. The
discipline, in those days, was dreadfully severe, and, I
may add, unmerciful. The men were punished so
often and so cruelly, that they became desperate, and
mutiny and desertion were things of frequent occur-
rence. Scarcely a day passed without the loss of a
man ; and even the extreme penalty of death, which
was the inevitable consequence of sucli crimes, did not
check their desire to escape from the service. The
chaplain took the opportunity to preach against deser-
tion, and selected, for his text, the eleventh verse of
the sixth chapter of Nelu-miah — ' And I said, should
such a man as I flee V He enlarged upon the duty of
sailors to be obedient to those who were set in autho-
rity over them, and to continue true to their engage-
ments, and enforced every exhortation by a repetition
of his text. He then concluded, by an eloquent appeal
to their feelings ; first eulogizing their coolness and in-
trepidity in danger, and then calling upon them to
stand by their king and country, and maintain the
honour of both, and slowly and emphatically reite-
rated, ' And I said, should such a man as I flee?' —
' No,' said a voice, which arose from among the ma-
rines, and was evidently the eflfect of ventriloquism —
' no, d — n you ! you are too well paid for that !' A
LIFE IN A COLONY. 169
loud, long-drawn breathing, was audible among the
men, who, feeling that something atrocious had been
done, which, in all probability, would be followed by
some terrible retribution, while an ill-suppressed titter
was heard among the junior officers, at the suddenness
and quaintness of the retort. The chaplain paused,
and looked at the Admiral, and the Admiral glared
at the men, as if he could annihilate them all. Im-
mediate inquiry was made, and the strictest examina-
tion of every individual instituted, accompanied by a
positive declaration that the whole ship's company
should be whipped, unless the culprit was given up.
The secret, however, was never divulged, nor the
threat of indiscriminate punishment carried into effect.
" More attention to the comfort of the men, greater
regularity, and less caprice in their management,
and a scale of punishment more proportioned to
offences, have rendered flogging almost unnecessary,
and executions of very rare occurrence. Poor fellows !
their lives are hard and perilous, but their hardships
and perils are occasionally aggravated by the tyranny
of their superiors. Admirals, though they vary in
size, temperament, and talent, all, more or less, bear
the same characteristic stamp. The difference is one of
class. For instance, there is your Admiral that is sent
out to die. Rising alone and unaided in the service,
it is late in life before he attains to the honours of his
profession, and, when he does, his palsied hand can
scarcely grasp his commission. Poor man ! his reign
VOL. I. 1
1 70 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
is short ; for his life expires before his period of ser-
vice has teriniiiateJ.
" Then there is vour Admiral that comes out to
make money. He has noble connections, or parlia-
mentary interest, and his sei-vices through life have
consequently been duly appreciated and promptly re-
warded. Though he entered the navy many years
after the aged man who preceded him in the com-
mand, he is in fiict scarcely his junior in rank, so
rapid hds been his promotion. He has come to make
money — but, alas ! money is no longer to be made.
The steamers carty all the coin and bullion which
were formerly transported by men-of-war, and the
Admiral, like others, is reduced to his pay, his rations,
and his grog.
" Then comes an Admiral, because it cannot be
helped. He is old, and has been long since forgotten,
especially as he never performed any services worth
remembering : but his name is on the list, and he can-
not be passed over. He is accordingly traced to his
agents, and from thence to Cheltenham, and again to
a cottage surrounded by every plant of every part of the
world tliat will endure the damp and sunless climate
of Enuland. The jrate of this museum of relics and
i-uriosities is opened by a servant, dressed in a pair of
loose duck trowsers, a check shirt, and white canvass
shoes, who gives a twitch with both hands to his waist-
band, a knowini; nod witli his head, and, looking at
the postman with a mischievous air, as if he would de-
LIFE IN A COLOXY. 171
light in tripping up his heels and scattering his letters
in the street, says, ' Well, master, what cheer now ?""
Closing the door on the impatient visitor, he reads on
the letter the words, ' On His Majesty\s Service^ and
says, musingly, ' Some musty old return, I suppose ;
for, as for service, we are hardly seaworthy now/ He
then proceeds into a little room hung round with
charts, spy-glasses, swords, and pistols, and shelves on
which are exhibited South Sea war-clubs, idols, ostrich
eggs, and curious feathers, the mantelpiece being gar-
nished with an extensive collection of the pipes of all
nations : at one end of the apartment is a hammock,
in which reposes the unconscious commander-in-chief
of the North American and West Indian station. In
a short time, the little occupant of the little cottage is
transported to Portsmouth, where he hoists his flag as
Admiral on board of one of the noble seventy-four gun
ships in that harbour, and sets sail for Halifax or Ber-
muda. He comes, because it couldn"'t be helped.
" Fighting Admirals are, happily, not required ;
and, when the day of need comes, they will no doubt be
found, as they always have been, among that numerous
class of officers who enjoy the benefit of experience
without the infirmities of age. Admirals ao-ain, even
of the same classification, notwithstanding this strong
family-likeness to each other, equally differ in pecu-
liarities, which, however, affect their subordinates
rather than civilians. They are generally uncomfort-
able inmates on board ship. There is your Admiral
I 2
1 72 THE OLD judgp: ; OR,
who never reads ; ho is an intolerable bore to the flag-
captain, whom etiquette requires to attend him on
deck and amuse him. He acts the part of dry nurse,
and loni;s to be reheved from his charge.
" Tlien, tlicre is your married Admiral, whose
ladies will violate all rules, by sitting on forbidden
parts of the ship, and insisting on his ordering sail t<»
be sliortcned unnecessarily to appea.se their fears,
while their horses, carriages, cows, cats, dogs, birds,
and furniture, encumber the ship to the annoyance of
everybody. They are very ungallantly styled live
lumber by Jack, and voted a nuisance, a term of re-
proach which is somewhat compensated for by the
evident admiration with which even the plainest of
their sex are reirarded in a place where women are
such a rarity that a petticoat is looked upon as the
attribute of Divinity.
'■'Tlien, there is the Admiral wlio does everything,
and he who does nothing. The first is adored by the
wliole fleet, for a sense of justice pervades all his acts :
services are rewarded, grievances redressed, and every
body and everything kept in their place. Where the
secretary rules all and does all, favouritism is dis-
covered or suspected ; and, like all favourites, he ie
exceedingly unpopular with everybody but his master.
Such are the men who so rapidly succeed each other
in the command on this station.
"Tlie old Admiral and the old General (for the
Governor is almost alwavs a military man) are the two
LIFE IN A COLONY. 371
hio-hest officials in the colouv ; each have their staff
and their guards, and each their little empire to rule.
The one is a despotic and the other a constitutional
monarch, and severally participate in the convenience
or disadvantage of their respective systems. The one
promulgates his own laws, and issues his orders on his
own responsibility, which are implicitly obeyed. Tile
other summons a parliament, and assembles around
him his little Lords and Commons, and receives rather
tlian gives law. He is not the machinery itself, but
only a part of it — a sort of pendulum, that, by an
equal vibration, balances and regulates the motions of
both sides. They reside at different ends of the
town, and love to reign apart from each other ; a united
service being incompatible with the habits and disci-
pline of both. There is a marked difference in their
beariucr.
" The Admiral is a plain, unaffected man, with a
frank and cordial manner, somewhat positive in his
lanouao-e, and having a voice that carries authority in
its very tones. He is always popular, for he con-
verses so freely and affably with every one, especially
with the chronometer-maker, whom he visits daily,
and instructs in the mysteries of taking observations
of the sun. He delio-hts in hoisting a mast into a
disabled merchantman, provided the skipper will stand
out of the way during the operation, and hold his
tongue about matters of which it is impossible he can
know anything ; or in sending a hundred men to
(
174 THE OLD JUDGE J OH,
warp a vessel out of a place of danger ; or in exhi-
biting the agility and boldne.ss of his sailor in extin-
guishing a lire that defies the efforts and appals the
couraire of landsmen. He is liberal in his expenditure,
and subscribes munificently to every object of public
iiarity.
The old General is erect and formal, and is com-
pelled to be ceremonious in defence of his prerogative
and station. He is also reserved and cautious, afraid
to commit himself by promises or opinions, and,
whenever practicable, shelters himself behind gene-
ralities. There is an apparent object in his con-
descension ; he is desirous of standing well with the
community, for much of his success depends upon his
personal influence. The public have a claim upon and
an interest in him ; for, though appointed by the
Crown, he is their Governor, and they take the liberty
of criticizins; him. The one, therefore, naturallv and
unconsciously wins the good will of people, and the
other labours to conciliate it. Popularity follows one,
and is wooed by the other. Their mode of life and
style of entertainment, too, are equally dissimilar.
" The Admiral has nothing to do with the legis-
lature, a sort of imperiu/n iit imperio, wiiich he is not
altogether able to understand, and whose remon-
strances look very like mutiny to him, and always
sucrsest the idea of arrest and court-martial. The
country members, therefore, are not seen at his table,
nor do their wives and daughters grace his evening
LIFE IN A COLONY. 17-5
parties. He is free and unfettered in the choice of his
society, and can select his associates from such portion
of the community as he pleases. His household is
principally composed of his attendants at sea, who
know his habits and humours, and can accommodate
themselves to them. His favourites, unlike those of
the other, who are always courtiers or politicians, are
a large Newfoundland dog, or a frolicksome goat, called
the Commodore, who knocks over the unwary in-
truder, to the infinite amusement of the numerous
domestics. The only part of his establishment that
is refractory are his sheep, which, notwithstanding that
the boatswain, boathook in hand, has been transformed
into a shepherd, are constantly breaking bounds, leap-
ing the stone walls, and scampering over the country.
His kitchen-garden is the best in the place, and he
prides himself not a little on his heads of cabbages
and lettuces, which, he says, are the whitest and
hardest that ever were seen ; and in his poultry -yard,
where white ducks, polar geese, guinea-hens, pea-
cocks, and Portugal fowls, sailor-like, are enjoying a
run on shore, and vie with each other in making the
most discordant sounds. His carriage bears the same
striking dissimilarity to the General's, The latter is
a state affair, displaying gay trappings and liveried
servants ; the former an unpretending, convenient,
little low-wheeled covered waggon, drawn by one stout
horse, and driven at a slow pace by his secretary, in
which he daily perambulates the unfrequented streets
¥^
17G THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
as well as the thorouuhfares of the town. His dinner
parties, also, are less formal. People are expected to
speak above a whisper, or they cannot be heard, and
to be at home, or they cannot be agreeable. The
dinner itself has a smack of the sea ; the dishes have
a liiuher seasoninir and a stronger flavour of vege-
tables, while the forbidden onion lurks stealthily con-
cealed under the crraw- It is more abundant and
substantial, and the decanters have a quicker pace and
travel, as if time were short, and a walk on deck was
soon apprehended. The servants move faster, though
more noisily, and retain a sidelong motion, bracing
out their feet, and hold fast the dishes as if they
momentarily expected a lurch, and were prepared to
maintain their equilibrium. Their apparel, too, is in
character— sliirhtlv varied, in some instances, and in
others not at all, from the regulation dress ; while the
butler (who is occasionally- heard to order, in an under
tone, Boy George to bear a hand, and IJill Gibson to
stow away tlie dishes), instead of looking like his
landlubber brotlier at Government House, heavy,
corpulent, and rosy, is a thin, sunburnt, weather-
beaten man, who has visited all parts of the world,
and undergone the vicissitudes of every climate, and
aj)pears to have selected Ids wines in the region in
whif^h tliev were made. The conversation, also, is
unlike that at the palace, having no reference what-
ever to local matters. You liear nothinjj of the !Mer-
rygomish Bridge, the election at Port Medway, or the
LIFE IN A COLONY. 177
alteration of the road at Aspatangon, to which the
Governor is compelled to hsten, and, at each repe-
tition, appear as much interested as ever.
" The sea is the sailor's home, and his topics are
dra^Ti from every part of the globe. When at the Ad-
miral's table, therefore, you forget you are in Halifax.
The following scraps of conversation that reach
your ear convince you that you are not among pro-
vincials, but men of the world.
" ' You drive a wild horse into the stream, whom
the electric eel immediately attacks ; after a few shocks,
he exhausts his muscular powers, and you may seize
him with impunity. They are occasionally found six
feet in length."'
" ' The Canopus was one of Napoleon's ships. She
was built of Adriatic oak, and, old as she is, is one
of the soundest and fastest vessels in the navv.'
' I don't think any thing of her age, and, as for
the timber, it is not to be compared to English oak :
last year, I saw in the harbour of St. John a mer-
chantman, that was employed by General Wolf, as a
transport, at the siege of Quebec'
" ' A double-bedded room does not mean, in the
States, a room with two beds, but a bed with two
persons in it. During the great embargo, I happened
to be at Oharlestown, South Carolina, when the land-
lord proposed to me to sleep with a dirty-looking
foreign officer. If I cannot have a separate bed, I
said, I prefer sitting before the fire all night to sleep-
I 5
178 THE OLD JUIXIK; oR,
ing with tliat d- — d Russian ! Is ho a Russian, sir ?
said a tall, thin, intjuisitivc Yankee, that stood listen-
ing to the conversation — is he a Russian I Til take
him, then, if it convenes you, stranger. I should
rather like it, for I never sl('j)t with a Russian."
" ' Cape Breton was once a separate government, and
that little village, Sidney, was the capital. When I
commanded tlie Linnet, I put in there for a supply of
coal. The Governor, who was the most extraordinary
person I ever met, told me his Chief Justice had passed
him in the street without touching his hat to him, and
asked me if I did not think such insolence would
justify him in removing him from his ofRce. Upon
my answering in the negative, he said, Til tell you
what ril do. By Jove, I will declare martial law, try
him at the drum-head, tie him up, and give him three
dozen !"'
" ' The Chinese regard these matters very philoso-
phically. When Elliot was cannonading the forts
above Canton, an officer came off with a Has of truce to
one of the ships, and told the Captain that he thought
the effusion of human blood both useless and wicked.
If you no fire iron plumbs, then I no fire iron plumbs.
You bang away powder for half an hour, and so will
I ; then I will run away, and you come and take the
fort.'
" ' It depends upon what part of the coast you
are on. The Gambia is by no means unhealthy, un-
less, perhaps, at the rainy season. It is a magnificent
LIFE IN A COLONY. 179
country ; I penetrated three hundred miles into the
interior, and the forest is like a vast umbrageous park.
I recollect riding one moonlight night through where
I was struck by the sound of the tinkling of innumer-
able little silver bells, which appeared to be attached
to all the trees. It was the African nightingale, with
which the forest was filled. I shall never forget the
eftect ; it was the sweetest and most charming thing 1
ever heard.**
'' ' He told me very gravely he saw a man breaking
a horse at Rio, upon which he had fastened a monstrous
pair of magnifying glasses, and, on inquiring of the
fellow what was the object of putting spectacles on a
horse, he replied that it was done for the purpose of
giving him a good action, for, by enlarging every ob-
ject on the road, it made him step high to avoid it.
He told the story so often that he began to beheve it
himself at last."*
■' All this midit as well have been said at Ports-
mouth or Plymouth as at Halifax, but is more agree-
able at the latter place than elsewhere, because it is a
relief to the monotonous conversation of a provincial
town.
" The evening parties are much the same as those
at Government House, which I have already described
to you, but have more naval and fewer military
officers, which, in a ball-room, is a decided improve-
ment. Your subaltern, when he has taken his first
lesson in ' soldiering ' in England, of which, by the by.
180 Tin-: ol.l) JUDGE; OR,
he is rather ashamed, for it is by no means the most
fasliionable amusement in that country, and hinds in
a colony, is rather a supercilious young gentleman,
that finds nothinir good enou<>h for him. lie talks to
young ladies of Almacks, where ho has never been ; of
the Opera, to which his mannna took him in the vaca-
tion ; and La Blache, Catalani, or Grisi, whom, if he
lias not seen, he has often heard of. He thinks it be-
neath his dignity to dance — the 10th never dance —
why should he ? But the days of puppyism soon pass
away, when their eyes are opened and they see as
well, and become as agreeable as other people. The
dear little middy is a different sort of person alto-
gether : he does not try to play the man — for he
actually is one, a frank, jolly, ingenuous fellow. The
cockpit is no place for afi'ectation and nonsense, and, if
by any chance they find their way there, they are ex-
pelled forthwith by common consent. There is no
pity or sympathy, even for the real distress of an
' exquisite.'
" I recollect an anecdote of poor Theodore Hook's
on this subject. I never know, ho said, but one in-
stance of real sympathy. I was in an outward bound
man of war oft" the Cape of Good Hope: tln' weather
was very stormy, the sea ran mountains high, and the
ship laboured dreadfully. One night I put on my
dreadnought coat and norwester hat, and went on
deck. It was so dark, and the rain falling in torrents,
it was (lillii'ult at first to distinguish objects. The
LIFE IN A COLONY. 181
boatswain was pacing to and fro as usual on his watch,
and I held on by the rigger, for the purpose of ascer-
taining his opinion of the probability of a change of
weather, when I heard a voice like that of a child cry-
ing. The sailor and I both approached the spot to-
gether whence the sound issued, where we found a
little midshipman weeping bitterly, as he clung to the
weather bulwarks to protect himself from the storm.
' Hullo ! who are you that are blubberino: like a
baby tliere V said the veteran, in a voice that resembled
the roll of a drum. ' Lord Windlas, sir,' was the reply.
*• Who the devil sent you here V ' My father, sir.'
' More fool he for his pains ! — he ought to have kept
you at school. Did you cry when you left home V
' Yes, sir,"" said the little fellow, releasing his hold,
and putting both fists to his eyes, as if to stop the
gushing tears. ' And your mother, did she cry ?'
' Ye-es, sir."* The old tar paused for a moment as if
touched by this instance of maternal tenderness, and
at last said, in a voice of great feeling, ' Poor old
devil !' and, twitching up his waistbands, resumed his
walk. Now that, said Hook, was the only instance of
real sympathy I ever saw. ' Poor old devil V how
much those words convey when they come fi*om the
heart !
" But to return to what I was talking of. A man-
of-war is a capital school to train a youngster in.
Take a military man out of his professsion, and to a
certain extent he is a helpless being. A sailor, on the
182 THE OLD JLDOH; OR,
contrary, is solf-relvin"-, bolil, liarcly, and well ae-
(juaintcd with everything that is useful tor making his
way in the world. This is the reason why a soldier
seldom succeeds, and a seaman rarely fails, when they
retire from their respective services and settle in the
colonies. The Admiral again is at home at a regatta ;
he is once more atioat and in his own element. The
first one that was ever held at Halifax was patronised
by my friend Sir James Capstan. He and I had been
boys together at school, and even, at that early period,
I was always known as ' Old Sandford," an appellation
probably derived either from the sedateness or awk-
wardness of my manner. We had lost sight of each
other for many years, wlien I was surprised and de-
lighted at hearinir that he had arrived at Halifax as
Connnander-in-Chief on this station. ' Good heavens !
here is Old Sandford,' he said, as he saw me ad-
vancing towards him. Alas ! what had begun in jest
time had turned into reality. I had, indeed, become
an aged man. ' My good friend,' he said, ' your
country has had more than its share of your time and
attention. I must monopolize you now while you are
in Halifax, for we have our mutual histories to relate,
and nmch to say to each other. To-morrow we are to
have a regatta. I suppDse it would be infra dig. for
the old Judge and the old Admiral to dance a jig
together, before the youngsters, but Til tell you what,
old boy, I don't know what you can do — but I could
dance one yet, and, by Jove ! when we are alone this
LIFE IN A COLONY. 183
evenino;, we will try. It will remind us of old times.
What has become of the Smiths I — monstrous fine galls
those — I have often thought of them since." ' Dead !'
' Dead ! the devil they are ! how shocking ! and those
two romping little Browns ? married, I suppose, and
have romping little daughters.' I shook my head.
' Gone, too,' I said. ' You forget that forty years
have passed since they were young, and that the
greater part of that generation has passed away.'
' Well, thank God, you and I, old fellow, have not
passed away ! I don't know what you intend to do,
but I have no idea of going yet, if I can help it. I
am worth a dozen dead men, and so are you.' While
active employment had kept him so busy that he ap-
peared not to have been aware of the lapse of years,
time also had passed him without notice : his spirits
were as buoyant and joyous as ever.
••' The following day was as brilliant and as propi-
tious as could be desired, and at an early hour the
harbour was covered with boats filled with light hearts
and merry faces. The noble ship, the Graball, was taste-
fully decorated with flags of every variety and colour,
and presented a gay and beautiful appearance. Every
convenience that ingenuity could invent, or delicacy
suggest, was provided for the comfort and accommoda-
tion of the guests ; every arrangement was perfect, with
the single exception, as a young lady observed, with
some degree of regret, that there was not a single pin
on the toilet-table of the dressing-room.
184 TIIK OLD JLDGE; OU,
" Soon after the company arrived, and wliilc the
Admiral was surrounded by a numerous assemblage of
ladies, a little flotilla of canoes was observ^ed advanciuir
from the opposite shore of Dartmouth, led by a rival
officer, the Commander-in-Ciiief of his own navy,
Admiral Paul, the Indian. He was a tall, well made,
active man, in the prime of life. He was dressed in a
frock-coat witli red facings, secured round the waist by
a sash of scarlet wampum ; jiis feet were ornamented
with a pair of yellow moccasins, with a white and blue
edging, curiously v.rought with the quills of the por-
cupine, A military cap (a present from some officer
of the garrison) completed his equipment. He ap-
proached the quarter-deck with an ease and eleijance
of motion that art can never supply, and, addressing
Sir James, said, ' Are you the Admiral f ' Yes !'
' So am I : I am Admiral Paul — all same, you see, as
one brudder/
" Paul, notwithstanding that his manner was so
natural and unaftected, was a great rogue withal, and
found it convenient to invest himself with two com-
missions. With the officers of the navy ho was an
Admiral, and with Sir Hercules Sampson he was a
Governor, Ho was, therefore, to use his own lan-
guage, ' all same as one brudder' with both ; and,
standing on such a footing of intimacy, was enabled to
receive fraternal assistance without anv diminution of
his dignity. He also liad the misfortune to take
' very big drinks,' which, though they did not lower
LIFE IN A COLONY. 185
the respect of his tribe for him, had the eflfect of set-
ting them a very bad example. Upon one occasion,
when he was soliciting a loan from the Governor,
(for he never condescended to beg), he was unhappily
intoxicated; his wants were liberally supplied upon
condition that he should never appear at ' the Palace '
again, unless he was perfectly sober, an agreement
into which he very readily entered. About a fort-
night afterwards he required another loan, but the
Governor refused it. ' Didn't you promise me never
to let me see you tipsy again V he said. ' Sartin !'
he replied. ' Why didn t you keep your word, then V
' Sartin, I keep my word.' ' Why, you are drunk
now, man." ' Sartin,' he replied, very coolly, ' sartin,
but it's the same old drunk, though — Paul not been
sober since — all same old drunk, Mr. Gubbernor.'
The drollery of the reply has caused it to pass into a
bye-word in this country. Uniform occupations, or
frequent repetitions of the same thing, are constantly
denominated 'the same old drunk.' Having esta-
blished his relationship to the Admiral, Paul thought
the opportunity for obtaining a loan not to be omitted.
' All same as one br udder, you see, Mr. Admiral,
so please lend me one dollar,' The novelty of the ap-
plication pleased my friend amazingly, and he gave
him several, adding, very needlessly, that there was
no necessity for returning them. Paul received them
with an easy bow, and deliberately counted them,
one, two, three, four, five, six ; and then, taking a fur
186 THE OLD JUDGE; OH,
pouch from the back part of his belt, iu which were
liis flint, steel, punk, aud tobacco, he deposited them
safely iu it, and replaced it as before, merely observing,
' Sartin, white Admiral makun money bery easy/
As he turned to depart, his countenance suddenly be-
came very tierce. ' Mr. Admiral,"" he said, ' do you
know that man V pointing to a young olBcer of the
ship. ' Yes,' he replied, ' I know him ; he is one of
my midshipmen.' ' Sartin he one d — d rascal !'
' Tut, tut, tut !' said the Admiral. ' Sartin, Mr.
Admiral, he one d — d rascal ! he kissum my squaw
yesterday." ' Tut, tut, tut !"■ he replied again, waving
his hand to him at the same time to go away, lest the
further continuance of the conversation might prove
inconvenient. ' Ah, Mr. Admiral,' he said with much
animation, and he advanced a little, and bending for-
ward held out his arm, in an attitude of elegance that
a sculptor might envy, ' ah, Mr. Admiral, if I kissum
your squaw ' (pointing to Lady Capstan) ' you no say
Tut, tut, tut, man !' and he retired, not quite satisfied
that justice had been done him.
" Of the regatta, you will perhaps be surprised to
hear that, in common with the young ladies, I saw
but little. I have always regarded a boat-race as a
very stupid, and a horse-race a very cruel thing. I
never could take any interest in them, and to describe
either would be to tell a thrice-told tale. The Admiral,
however, entered into it with all his heart, and was
delighted that the fishermen of Herring Cove and
LIFE IN A COLONY. 187
the eastern passage beat (as tliey always do) the
barae of the man-of-war. He said it would take the
conceit out of the lubbers, make them mind their eye
for the future, for there was not a man in the ship
could pull an oar properly,
" I was more amused myself at what was passing
around me. A dance on board ship is always more
pleasant than in a ball-room, not that the latter
is less commodious or convenient, but because the
former is a novelty. The decorations are dift'erent,
and even the natural obstacles of the place are either
concealed with taste, or converted into objects of use
or ornament. The effect is produced by great trouble
and ingenuity, and who are there who do not person-
ally appropriate much of this as a compliment to them-
selves I The part of host is played not by one, but by
twenty, for every officer is interested in the honour of
the ship, and the reputation of her hospitality ; and
what cannot many hands, heads, and hearts accom-
plish ? The dance (for, after all, though the regatta
was the professed object, this was the real attraction,
which was on the main deck), from the hour, the
place, and the occasion, partook more of the character
of a private party than a public entertainment, and
was accordingly more agreeable, in proportion as it
was less formal.
" ' Ah, Sandford,"" said the Admiral, who was de-
lighted beyond measure, ' I wish you had your robes
on — we would try that jig now ; wouldn't we astonish
188 THE OLD JUDGE; OR.
the boys, eli ? D — n tluni ! they look as solemn, and
dance as licavily, as it' tlu-y were stamping their feet
to keep them warm at a funeral in winter ! Look at
that dandy — it is half-past twelve o'clock witii the
navy, when you see such fellows as that on the
quarter-deck. It was a bad day for the service when
the kinir sent his son to sea. It made it fashionable,
and fashion plays the devil with a ship. We should
always keep up the distinctions between the services.
Let the army he fashionable, and the nary manly, and
if they stick to that, they may keep their troops at
home for parades and reviews, and we will do all the
fighting for them :' and, lowering his voice, said, ' I
don't know what you intend to do, but the sun is over
the fore-yard, and I am going to have a glass of grog.
I suppose it would horrify Sampson to ask him, for
he is too fashionable for that, and, if he wasn't, his
stock is buckled so tight, he couldn't bend his liead
back sufficiently to swallow it. He is not a bad fellow,
though, after all, but he is one of the old school of
pipeclay and pomatum soldiers, and is as stiff and
starched as a shirt collar.'
"• In the midst of gaiety there is always sadness.
The chords of pleasure are so interwoven with those
of melancholy in the Imman mind, that it is difficult
to touch the one without causing a vibration of the
other. Like the strings of an ^Eolian harp, they all
awaken to life under the influence of the same wliisper-
ing breeze, and blend their joyous notes and pensive
LIFE IN A COLONY. 189
wailino-s tosfether. The Admiral seemed to be sen-
sibly affected by this mysterious feeling. But it was
a mere sudden emotion, as fleeting and as transitory
as a cloud passing over the sun.
" ' Sandford,"' he said, ' the other day — for it ap-
pears no longer ago — I was a midshipman in this
port — I am now commander-in-chief at the same
place : that was my first, and this will be my last
cruise in life, for, when I return home, I shall be put
on the shelf, or perhaps converted into a sort of hulk,
or receiving ship, an old port admiral : it is a short
run we make of it in this life, after all, ain't it ? How
sad a thing ? Hullo, sir !** he said, calling out aloud
to a servant, ' if you don't know better than that, by
Jove, I'll have vou tauoht in a way you won't forget !
ril give you three dozen, as sure as you are born.
D — n that fellow ! he has knocked all the sentimenta-
lity out of me. And yet, I don't know but what I
ouo;ht to thank him for it, for a man that talks
foolishly, may soon begin to act foolishly. But come,
old boj'-, let us have that glass of grog.
" ' Talking of giving that fellow three dozen,' he
continued, ' puts me in mind of a prank of my uncle,
Sir Peter's. Previous to the American rebellion, he
commanded a frigate on the Boston station : having
put into one of the Puritanical ports of New England,
he happened to dine on shore, and, as usual with him
when not on board, got tipsy. The select men, who
afiected to be dreadfully shocked at such a bad example
190 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
being set by people in hiirh places, apprehended him,
and put him in the stocks as a terror to all evil-doers.
For once in his life (for he was a violent tempered
man), he uttered no threats, and made no complaints,
but quietly submitted himself to the inevitable insult.
On the following day he called upon the committing
magistrates, applauded their zeal and impartiality in
administering the law, and invited them to come and
dine on board with him, as a proof that they no longer
liarboured any resentment against him for the heinous
oftence he had perpetrated. This they readily agreed
to do, and were accordingly most kindly received and
hospitably entertained, and enjoyed themselves exceed-
ingly. As the time approached for their departure, a
servant entered the cabin, and whispered to the custos
that there was a gentleman above who desired to speak
to him for a moment on urgent business. As soon as
the Justice made his appearance on deck, the boat-
swain seized him, stripped him, and, tying him
up, gave a dozen lashes. Each of the others were
severally summoned, and punished in a similar
manner, when tlicv were set on shore — the anchor
was hoisted, and the vessel put under weigli for
Eno;land.'
" liut to return to the party ; the company was a
mixed one, every officer having invited his own friends,
and some of them having made rather strange ac-
quaintances. — I heard one of the young ladies object
to a tune which she said was as old as ' three irrand-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 191
mothers ago,"* and another observe that Lord Heather
had his 'high and mighty boots on,'' and was quite 'high-
cock spotty' to-day. The sentiment was old, though
the phraseology was novel, and it must be admitted
that if there were nothing but proprieties in this life,
we might, perhaps, lose in insipidity as much as we
gained in refinement. The maxim that extremes meet
was fully verified, for the smallest midshipman seemed
to pride themselves on having the tallest partners. I
heard one little fellow, who threw back his head and
looked up at his cliere amie, as if he were addressing
the man at the mast-head, say, ' I hope you will
keep a good look-out, or we shall run foul of the
captain.' ' Starboard, Milne,' said one. — ' Larboard,
Skipsey,' said another, while a third advised his
friend, who appeared to be steering wildly, to ' port
his helm.'
" The great object of attraction was an American
heiress of immense fortune, a young lady from New
Orleans. She was the daughter of an undertaker in
that city, which was the best stand in the Union, as
he boasted, for a man in his line of business. His
coffins were made in Massachusetts by machinery, and
served the double purpose of conveying ' New England
notions' to the Mississippi, and the dead to the church-
yards. But, alas, for human expectations ! the deli-
cate girl of a sickly climate, who had been enriched
by the toll-house of the grave, vampire-like, was
plethoric and heavy. She looked like an hospital nurse
1}>2 THE OLD JL l)f;E ; OR.
that faithfully tlolivorod the medicines to the patients,
and appropriated tlie wine and porter of the conva-
lescents to herself. Never was there such a disap-
pointment ; for, after all. it is easy to invest with
divinity the being that presides over funeral obsequies,
and there is sublimity as well as poetry in the grave,
but reptiles alone fatten on corruption. ' Stay, IJill,"'
said a little humourist to his companion, ' she may
have a million of money, but Fm blowed if she is
worth a d — n, after all V
" If, however, she had thriven by caring for the
dead, there was one of the company who was nearly
worn out by caring for the living. He was an active
little old man, with a benevolent thouirh remarkablv
ugly face, and, judging by his dress, belonged to some
public department. His head was uncommonh' bald,
and very nearly round, which, with the yellow tint of
the skin, suggested the idea of a ball of soap that had
fallen on the floor, and, rolling on the carpet, had
jrathered a few hairs. He attended at the ladder, atid
assisted the ladies in their ascent to the deck ; cau-
tioned them against portholes and hatches, which,
though closed, might open of themselves, and precipi-
tate them either into the hold or the harbour ; pointed
out the cannon, and entreated them not to stumble
over them, as they might fracture their lind)s ; and,
above all, advised them not to stand in draughts, or
take ice-creams when they were heated. He had a long
catalogue of accidents wherewith to illustrate every
LIFE IN A COLONY. 193
caution, and several ingenious inventions to counteract
the effects of damps or chills.
" The Admiral, whose attention was directed to
him while he stood bowing to the ladies, and rubbing
his hands, asked who that ' httle wash-mj-hand sort
of a person was, and, on being informed that his name
was Davis, recooiiised him as a barrack-master whom
he had known at Malta, and immediately addressed
him, complimenting him upon having ' worn so well.'
' Ah, my dear Sir James," he said, ' my good looks
have ruined me. It is the worst thing in the world
to have a juvenile face. The medical board refused
to superannuate me last year, saying I was an active
man yet, and fit for service. Most men hke to look
young, or to be thought young, but, alas ! my good
looks have been a great misfortune to me. They have
broken my heart — yes, yes ! they will be the death of
me yet. But don't let me detain you here, sir, in
the draught of this awning ; it is very dangerous, very
liable to give cold, or bring on rheumatism — they are
the cause of half the illness in the country." ' You
should have stood in one of them yourself, then, my
old friend,'' was the good-humoured reply, ' before you
applied to the board for your superannuation."'
"• The lunch, which was a capital one, was a merry
affair, and everybody seemed to enjoy themselves un-
commonly. But where was there ever a midshipman
without a practical joke attesting his presence^ The
Governor's hat had exchanged its plume for a sprig of
VOL. I. K
194 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
spruce, and a commissary-general, whose sword-belt
had been shortened so that it would no longer buckle
round liiiii, was heard to exclaim, ' Good heavens ! is
it possible, the luncheon could have made all this dif-
ference in my size V
" While roaming about the ship, I was a good deal
surprised at the apathy of a sailor, who was sitting
with his back turned to the gay scene, quietly stitching
a pair of shoes, with the most philosophical indifference
to all that was passing around him. In reply to some
remark I made on the subject of the party, he said,
' Ah, sir, I have seen enough of them in my day —
our part of the entertainment will come to-morrow,
when we have to clear up the ship, which will be in
a devil of a mess when it's all over/
" The big-wigs, as the naval and military com-
manders-in-chief were called by the youngsters, were
now preparing to go on shore, and the former pressed
me to accompany them. As they were about to de-
scend the side of the ship, our old friend Paul made
his appearance again. ' Ah, Mr. Gubbernor,"' he said,
' sartain me lose very much yesterday — my camp all
burned up — Paul very poor now.'' ' I am very sorry
for you,' was the reply. 'Yes, brudder, but how much
are you sorry ? Are you sorry one pound V The ruse
was successful, and the contribution, as a measure of
grief, was paid to him. ' And you, Mr. Admiral,
how much you sorry T Another pound rewarded this
appeal also. ' Thank you, brudders — sartain white
LIFE IN A COLONY. 195
man's pocket, like brook, keep run all the time, and
never get empty. Indian man's pocket all same as
glass of rum, one drink, and it's all gone.'
" We now left the ship ; and at the dockyard gate,
where their respective carriages were in attendance,
the old Admiral and the old General cordially shook
hands with each other, and parted."
K ::
19G THE OLD JUDGE; OH,
CPIAPTER VII.
THE FIRST SETTLERS.
Nothiii"; astonishes the inhabitants of these colonies
more tlian the poverty, ignorance, and degradation of
the people who are landed upon their shores, from the
passenger ships that annually arrive from Europe.
The destitution of these unfortunate emij;rauts so far
exceeds any thing ever Seen among the native popula-
tion, that they cannot understand how it is possible
that human beings cfin voluntarily surrender them-
selves as willing victims to starvation, who have the
bodily strength to work, and the opportunities of earn-
ing their bread, as it is well known they have in their
own country. Although they are too often the dupes
of demagogues themselves, they are too proud to
receive alms, live in a country too poor to feed
wilful idleness, and no man has ever yet had the
hardihood to incite them to rapine and murder.
Though neither frugal nor diligent, they cannot
conceive a people being satisfied with less than a decent
maintenance, or being so debased as to beg, or so
wicked as to take by violence what they can earn by
LIFE IN A COLONY. 197
labour. They are a kind and affectionate people, and
hear with horror of the atrocious crimes with which,
alas ! so many of these strano^ers are familiar at home.
A group of these unfortunate and misguided people,
arrivino; at Elmsdale this morning, sought, or, I
should rather say, demanded, pecuniary aid, for their
tone was more exacting than supplicating. As they
were all able-bodied men, they received an offer of em-
ployment, which, they were informed, was the course
usually adopted at that place, as best suited to the
means of the proprietor, and the object they had in
view, of earning a subsistence. This they refused, not
only with incivility, but with a distinct avowal that, if
they were in their own country, they would take a very
summary mode of enforcing compliance with their
wishes.
" Oh," said the Judge, " what a change has come over
this continent ! These men, who begin by begging or
stealing, end by governing. Political power is pos-
sessed by the mass, and this stream of pauperism in-
creases and pollutes it ; and, whatever our neighbours
may say to the contrary, civilization is retrograding,
and not advancing. In this province, all our emigrants
of late years have been poor and illiterate. The first
settlers were scholars and gentlemen. You may recol-
lect I related to you, some time ago, the particulars of
a sincrular trial I was concerned in at Phnnouth, in
which one Barkins was my client, and the reluctance I
had to go there, in consequence of an interesting exa-
198 THE OLD JUDGE; Oil,
mination I was making of the scene of the first effective
settlement made in this continent at Annapolis. The
people who discovered and colonized this country
were so different from those who come to us in the
present day, that it may amuse you to hear the result
of my investigations.
" During one of my visits to Paris, I had acci-
dentally met with the Journal of Mark Lescarbot, a
French lawyer, who had accompanied the exploring
party that first visited this part of America. With
this book in my hand (which was published as early
as 1609) I traced their movements from place to
place, in their attempt at colonization. On the Sth of
November, 1603, Henry IV. of France granted to the
Sieur de Monts, a gentleman of his bed-chamber, a
patent, constituting him Lieutenant-General of L' A cadi,
(now Nova Scotia) with power to conquer and Chris-
tianize the inhabitants. On the 7th of March, having
equipped two vessels, he set sail from Havre de Grace,
accompanied by the celebrated Champlain and Mon-
sieur Poutrincourt, and arrived on the 7th of May at
a harbour (Liverpool) on the south-east shore of the
province. From thence they continued coasting the
country, until they arrived at the Bay of Funday.
On the eastern side of this bay they discovered a
narrow strait, into which they entered, and soon found
themselves in a spacious basin, environed with hills,
from which descended streams of fresh water. Be-
tween these high lands ran a large navigable river, to
LIFE IN A COLONY, 199
which they gave the name of L''Equille. It was bor-
dered by fertile meadows, and filled with delicate fish.
Poutrincourt, charmed with the beauty of the place,
gave it the name of Port Royal (now Annapolis).
After exploring the neighbourhood, and refreshing
themselves, they ascended the river Saint John, as far
as Fredericton, and then, visiting the coast of Maine,
spent the winter of 1604-5 at the island of Saint Croix,
the identity of which has lately been the subject of so
much discussion between the governments of Great
Britain and the United States. The weather proved
very severe, and the people suffered so much from
scurvy, that thirty-six of them died. The remaining
forty, who were all invalids, lingered on till the spring,
when they recovered, by means of the fresh vegetation.
" After an ineffectual attempt to reach a more
southern climate, they recrossed the bay to Port
Royal, where they found a reinforcement from France
of forty men, under the command of Dupont. They
then proceeded to erect buildings on the spot where
Annapolis now stands, with a view to a permanent occu-
pation of the country. De Monts and Poutrincourt,
having put their afiairs in as good order as possible,
embarked in the autumn for France, leaving Pont-
grage Commandant, with Champlain and Champdore
as Lieutenants, to perfect the settlement and explore
the country. During the winter, they were plentifully
supplied by the savages with venison, and a great
trade was carried on for furs. Nothing is said of the
200 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
scurvy ; but they liacl a short allowance of bread, uot
by reason of any scarcity of corn, but because they
had no moans of sjrinding it, except a hand-mill,
which required hard and continued labour. Tiie
savaires were so averse to this exercise, that they pre-
ferred hun<;er to the task of grinding, though they
were offered half of the flour in payment. l)e Monts
and Poutrincourt were at that time in France, pre-
paring, under every discouragement, for another voyage.
•• On the ISth of May, 1 GOG, they sailed from
Rochelle, accompanied by Lescarbot, who has left us
a record of their proceedings ; and, on the 27th of
July, arrived at Port Royal. To their astonishment,
they found but two persons remaining. The rest,
conjecturing from the long absence of succour, that
the settlement had been abandoned by De Monts, com-
pelled the officer in charge to sail for Canseau, in order
that they might obtain a passage to France in some
of the fishing vessels that frequented that port. Two
men, however, having more courage and more faith
than the others (La Taille and Mequelet), volun-
teered to remain and guard the stores and the build-
ings. These faithful retainers were at their dinner,
when a savage rushed in and informed them that a
sail vvas in sight, which they soon discovered to be the
long-expected vessel of their chief. Poutrincourt
now began his plantation ; and, having cleared a spot
of ground, sowed European corn and several kinds of
orarden vefretables.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 201
" But, notwithstanding all tlie beautj^ and fertility
of Port Eoyal,*De Monts had still a desire to make
discoveries fiirther towards the south. He therefore
prevailed upon Poutrincourt to undertake a voyage to
Cape Malabarre (Cape Cod), and, on the 28th of
August, the ship and the barque both put to sea. In
the former, De Monts and Dupont returned to France,
while Poutrincourt, Champlain, Champdore, and others,
crossed the bay to Saint Croix, and then continued
their survey of the coast. In the mean time, Lescar-
bot, who remained behind at Port Royal, was busily
employed in the cultivation of the garden, harvesting
the crop, completing the buildings, and visiting the
encampments of the natives in the interior.
" On the 14th of November, Poutrincourt returned
from his exploring voyage, which had proved disas-
trous, and was received with every demonstration of
joy by the party at the fort. Lescarbot had erected a
temporary stage, which he called the ' Theatre of
Neptune,' from which he recited a poetical address to
his friend, congratulating him on his safe arrival, pro-
bably the first verses ever written in North America,
Over the gate were placed the royal arms of France,
encircled with evergreens, with the motto, —
' DVO PROTEGIT VNYS.'
" Above the door of the house of De Monts were
placed his arms, embellished in a similar manner, with
the inscription, —
' DABIT DEUS HIS QUOQUE FINEM.'
K 5
202 THE OLD JUDGE ; OK,
" Poutrincourt's apartments were graced with the
same simple decoration, liaviug the classical super-
scription, —
' INVIA VIRTUTI NVLLA EST VIA.'
" The manner in which they spent the third winter
(lGOG-7) was social and festive. Poutriucourt esta-
blished the order of ' Le Bon Temps,' of which the
principal officers and gentlemen, fifteen in number,
were members. Every one was maitre dliotel in his
turn for one day, beginning with Chaniplain, who was
first installed into the office. The president, (whom
the Indians called Atoctegi) having superintended the
preparations, marched to the table, baton in hand, with
the collar of the order round his neck, and napkin on
his shoulder, and was followed by the others succes-
sively, each carrying a plate. The same form was
observed at every meal ; and, at the conclusion of
supper, as soon as grace was said, he delivered, with
nmch gravity, his insignia of office to his successor,
and pledged him in a cup of wine. The advantage of
this institution was, that each one was emulous to be
prepared for his day, by previously hunting or fishing,
or purchasing fish or game of the natives, who con-
stantly resided among them, and were extremely
pleased with their manners. The chiefs of the savages
were alone allowed the honour of sittins at their table ;
the others partook of the hospitality of the kitchen.
The abundance and variety of the fare this winter was
a subject of no little boasting to Lescarbot, on his
LIFE IN A COLONY. 203
return to Europe, where he taunted the frequenters of
la Rue aux Ours de Paris, (where was one of the first
eating-houses of the day), that they knew nothing of
the pleasures of the tahle who had not partaken of the
beavers' tails, and the mouffles of the moose of Port
Roval. The weather, meanwhile, was particularly
mild and agreeable.
" On the 14th of January, on a Sunda}'^, they pro-
ceeded by water two leagues, to a corn-field, where
they dined cheerfully in the sunshine, and enjoyed the
music of their fatherland. You will observe, there-
fore, my dear sir, that, from the earliest account we
have of this climate, it has always had the same
character of variableness and uncertainty. The winter
but one preceding this (when they were at St. Croix)
was extremely severe ; and, we are informed, that that
which succeeded it was remarkable for the most intense
cold the Indians ever recollected. Their time, how-
ever, was not devoted to amusement alone. They
erected more buildings, for the accommodation of other
adventurers, whom they expected to join them the
following year, in making pitch for the repairs of
their vessels, and, above all, in putting up a water-
mill to grind their corn. In this latter attempt they
completely succeeded, to their own infinite relief and
the great amusement of the savages. Some of the
iron work of this first North American mill is yet in
existence, and another of the same kind (Easson's
Mill) still occupies the ancient site.
204 THE OLD JUDGE; OK,
" You will, porhaps, smile at the idea of antiquities
in a country which is universally called a new world ;
but America has a great advantage over Europe in this
respect, that it has a record of its birth, while the
orifrin of the other is to be souijht for in the region of
fable. I am a native of this country, and this little
settlement has always had great attractions for me,
who am an old Tory, from its primogeniture being two
years older than James Town, in Virginia, and three
years senior to Quebec, which was settled twelve years
before the landino: of the Pilfrrim Fathers in Massa-
chusetts."
LIFE IN A COLONY. 205
CHAPTER VIII.
MERRIMAKINGS.
The shooting season having commenced most
fevourably this autumn, Barclay and myself spent a
few days at Foxville, where the snipe are very abun-
dant, and on our return tried, with great success, the
copse that skirts the meadow between Elmsdale and
Illinoo for woodcock. While crossing a little wooded
promontory that intersected the alluvial land, and
interrupted our sport, I heard the shrill voice of a
female at some little distance, in great apparent dis-
tress ; and, stopping a moment to ascertain the direc-
tion from whence the sound came, I distinctly heard
the following extraordinary dialogue.
" Oh, John ! my head ! my head ! — let me die !
rd rather die ! — oh, John, do ! How can you act
so? Oh, let me die !" — to which the person appealed
to so pathetically replied —
" Oh, no, Sally, don"'t be scared — it won't hurt you
— live a little long-er."
" I tell you, I'd rather die — I will die !"
" There, then, if you must die, die !"
206 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
" Yes, but not so suddenly, John. Let me die
easy !"
Rushing forward with what speed I could, I sud-
denly caught a view of a young woman, seated in a
swing, suspended between two trees, having a rope
attached to the seat, by means of which her com-
panion forced her backwards and forwards, in her pen-
dulous motion. The alarniinir lanfjuajie she had used,
it appeared, was merely the technical term applied to
the cessation of the impulse given by the ropes that
regulated the movement. And dying, I found, to
my surprise, meant not to cease to live, but to cease
swinging. The fair one who had so unconsciously
terrified me by her screams of aflfright, and, as I
thought, by her threats of suicide, was a stout, strong,
blooming country girl, of about eighteen years of age ;
and her attendant a good-natured, awkward, rustic
admirer, but little older than herself. She had died,
as she desired, by the time I had reached the spot,
the swing being nearly motionless, and was ready to
be safely deposited on and not in the ground, as I had
feared, an office which I performed for her, to the sur-
prise and evident disappointment of her companion.
" I was properly scared, you may depend," she
said ; " that's a fact : a body that ain't used to carry
their liead so low, and their feet so high, is apt to get
kind of dizzy, and haven't ought to be throwed up so
hard, all of a suddent, lest the scat might sort of turn
bottom upwards."
LIFE IN A COLONY. 207
Seeino- a number of tables with baskets upon them,
in an open glade, at some distance before us, and a
great concourse of people assembling, I asked her
what was the occasion of it.
" It is a pickinick stir, sir," was the reply.
" A pickinick stir !" I inquired ; " what is thatT
although, from the preparations that were making,
the meaning was perfectly obvious, but I wanted to
hear her definition yet, as I had no doubt she would
express herself in the same droll language.
" La^vful heart !" she said, "* I thought every body
knew what a pickinick stir was. Why, it's a feed,
to be sure, where every critter finds his own fodder."
" Ah," I said, " then I fear I am an intruder, for I
have no fodder ; and, what is worse, I am neither
invited nor expected. I regret this the more," I
added, " as I should like very much to see a pickinick
stir."
" Ah, you are funning now, ain't you ? Would
you, though, in rael, right down earnest f
" Certainly," I said, " I should be delighted."
" Well, that's very easy fixed, any how. John,"
she said, " go and bring your basket, and look into
sister Hannah Dowler's waggon, and fetch the wooden
pail, with the birch bark cover, and no handle to it ;
and, if we can't find enough for the stranger, it's a
pity, that's all."
John hesitated for a moment, standing before her
with a very sorrowful expression of countenance, as if
208 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
to catch an assurance from lier eye that he was not to
be deserted for another.
" Wliy, what ails the critter?" she said, "that you
stand starln' and a gapin"* there, as vacant as a spare
room, hjoking as if you couldn't hear, and had never
seed a body afore ;" and then, altering her manner
as if the trutli suddenly flashed upon her, she added,
in a milder and more conciliatory tone, " Go, John,
that's a good soul, and don't bo all day about it :"
words that inspired new life and most ra])id motion
into the jealous swain. She then seated herself on
the grass near the declivity of the sloping knoll, and,
leaning back, supported her head with her hand, by
resting on her elbow.
" Sit down," she said ; " sitting is as cheap as
standing, when you don't pay for it, and twice as
easy." Obeying her command, I assumed the same
attitude, and there we were, who, a few moments before,
had never seen each other, in tliis singularly easy
position, conversing face to face as unceremoniously
and as freely as if we had known each other for years.
" Dear me," she said, as her eye foil on my disengaged
hand, for the other was concealed by my hair, " what
a small hand you have, and how white it is ! — what
do you do to make it so white ? — washin them in
buttermilk, they say, is grand ; — what do you do f
" Nothing," I replied ; " wearing gloves produces
the effect."
" Ah !" she said, " I see, you belong to the (piality,
LIFE IN A COLONY. 209
I suppose, or keep a store, or sell doctors' means — and
haven't to use your hands. Mine" (and she held up
one of hers, and examined it minutely) " are horrid
hard, ain't they? — all crinkum crankum like, and
criss-crossed every which way — sort of crisped and
chapped ; but it can't be helped, I do suppose, for they
are in and out of hot and cold water for everlasting."
" It is lucky it doesn't affect the Hps," I remarked.
" Well, so it is," she rephed, and added, in the most
artless manner possible, " I vow, I never thought of
that before. So you never see a pickinick stir, sir."
" No, not here."
" What, are you an entire stranger in these parts f
" Yes."
" Lawful heart, you don't say so ! So be I. I
live to the mill-ponds to Yarmouth, where I am to
home ; but now I am on a visit to sister Hannah,
who is married to the cross roads. Then, perhaps,
you never see a Bee stir 1"
" No."
" Nor a raising ?"
" No."
" Nor a quilting ?"
" No."
" Nor a husking ?"
" No."
" Nor a berrying ?"
" No."
" Scissors and pins ! — why, you hain't seen nothing
210 THE OLD JUDCK; OR,
of our ways yet ! Well, Fve been to 'em all, and
ril tell you what, I like a rolling frolic better tlian
all on them. There is always fun at the end <>f
the roll — if you'll — but here's John ; he's generally
allowed to be the greatest hand at a roll in these
clearings — the critter's so strong ! No, it ain't John,
neither. Creation ! how vexed he would be if he
knowed he was taken for that scarecrow, Norton Hog,
who looks, for all the world, like a suit of clothes,
hung on a bean pole stuck out to air ; he is so horrid
thin ! Well, there's no accounting for taste — what
do you think now? — he was married last week to
Betsy Spooner, as likely a gall as you will see any
where, I know — fact, I assure you, she is twenty and
he forty — exactly twice her age ; and so, as sister
Hannah says, when she is fifty, he will be a hundred.
Isn't it a horrible, scandalous match V
" Pray, who is John V I inquired, as I saw him
approach.
" Old Mr. Thad Raftise's son."
" Is he to be the happy man ?"
" Well, the critter is happy enough, for all I know
to the contrary."
" If I am in the country, may I come to the wed-
ding, and offer a bridal present in return for your
kindness to-day ?"
"Wedding! — oh, my! — well, I never! — now I
understand you. Marry John Rafuse ! Lord love
you, no I not unless I can't do no better, I can tell
LIFE IN A COLONY. 211
you. He's well enough, and won"*! want, seeing his
father is well to do ; but he ain't got no force — he
wants a head-piece — he's sort of under-baked. I
ain't in no hurry to splice neither, at any rate, though
I won't just say I won't take John Rafuse at no time,
neither ; for, as Hannah says, a poor husband is
better than none ; and it's handy to have a man about
the house, for they can do little chores to home, and
run of errands. Are you married V
" No."
" Why don't you !"
" Who would have me ?"
" Ah ! you are fishing for compliments now, but
Praise to the face
Is open disgrace ;
and I won't humour you, for men are so a^vful con-
saited ! I guess the will, and not the way, is wanted.
Why, John," she exclaimed, on looking up, and ob-
serving him without his basket and pail, " what on
airth have you done with all those chicken-fixings, ham-
trimmings, and doe-doings, besides the pies, notions,
and sarces ; has any thing happened to them V
" Squire Barclay told me to thank you, and say he
had made provision for his friend and himself, and
here he is,"
Having arranged matters so as to have the young
lady. Miss Sally Horn, as our neighbour at the table,
Barclay and I left the young couple together, and
strolled through the crowd, and mingled with the
■2] -2 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
various groups that were scattered on -the green, or
dispersed in the woods.
'' This," said Barclay, " is a pic-nic, given by the
owner and builder of the large timber-ship, of one
thousand tons, we saw launched at Illinoo yesterday,
to the families and friends of those who have in vari-
ous ways been engaged either in gathering or prepa-
ring the materials, or putting them together; for the
construction of a vessel of such magnitude gives em-
ployment to a vast number of people, who cut, hew,
or haul the timber. The owner is also desirous of
ingratiating himself with the people, over whom he
has some design of acquiring political influence, being
a violent democrat. If you took any interest in such
subjects, it would amuse, or rather I should say dis-
gust you, to see how men and not measures, office and
not principle, is at the bottom of our colonial politics.
As it is, his harangue would appear to you like a fo-
reign language, and really the idiom is not worth
acquiring. Come and look at the vehicles ; such a
stranije collection is worth seeinij,"
Hay-carts filled with temporary seats, waggons fur-
nished with four posts and a tester-like awning resem-
bling a bedstead, carts ornamented with buffalo robes,
or having their rude timbers concealed by quilts, to-
gether with more ambitious gigs, cabs, cars, and
britzschkas of every variety, form, and colour, occupied
the field near the main road, to the fences of which
were fastened the horses, many of which, having huge
LIFE IN A COLONY. 213
pillions attached to the saddles, appeared to have
carried several persons on their backs.
" A large temporary table, you observe," continued
Barclay, " is spread at one end of the Green, and several
of nearly equal size occupy the other; a division ren-
dered necessary by the scruples of the advocates of total
abstinence from all vinous or fermented liquors, who,
not contented with exercising the right of doing as they
please themselves, are determined to force others to
follow their example, and will not permit the use of
wine in their presence. How often does it happen in
this world that the most strenuous advocates for liberty
in theory are the most exclusive and tyrannical in
practice!"
Here a man wearing a badge to distinguish him
as a manager proclaimed, in a loud voice, " All ye in-
vited guests, fall into the precession, and come to the
platform !" This was a sort of circular scaftbld erected
in the centre of the glade, formed around and supported
by the trunk of a large elm. Three or four speakers
soon made their appearance, and, ascending this ele-
vated stage, addressed the company much in the same
style and upon nearly the same topics. The ship whose
launch they had come to celebrate was eulogized as
one of the largest, fastest, best built, and beautifully
modellel vessels ever seen in this or any other countrj'.
The builder was said to have done honour to the pro-
vince in general, and his native town in particular,
and was adduced as one of many instances to prove
214 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
that Nova Scotians only wanted opportunities to be
afforded them to excel all mankind, the humblest of
them being fitted for the highest offices of state at
liome, or abroad ; but that, unhappily, during the long
Tory rule in Englaud, the aristocracy engrossed every
situation of honour or emolument in every part of the
empire. The company were assured that the Legislative
Council of this province contained as many learned,
and the House of Assembly as many able statesmen,
as the Lords or Commons'' Houses of Great Britain,
and that their integrity and honour were equal, if not
superior.
The colonies, it was said, were filled with mineral
wealth, so near the surface as to be exhumed with very
little outlay ; and all that was required was for Eng-
land to open their native treasures at her own expense,
and give all the returns to the people — an act of justice
which, ere long, she would be compelled to perform,
and which would long since have been spontaneously
done, had it not been for certain influential persons in
this country, who wanted the proceeds to be given ex-
clusively to them. It was confidently predicted that a
railroad would be immediately constructed by the mo-
ther country between Halifax and Illinoo, and another
between the former place and Quebec ; as the local
legislature had most liberally done its part by giving
permission to any company to be formed for that pur-
pose, to pass through the land of the crown, and take
as nmch of it as was necessary, which they had a per-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 215
feet right to do, the Queen being a mere trustee for
the public, and, of course, having no interest whatever
of her own. And much to the same purpose.
Mothers were then implored to look upon their
children with pride as having the honour to be Blue
Noses ; and were assured that Latin and Greek, which
had hitherto been upheld by Tories, to create a dis-
tinction between the rich and the poor, were exploded,
or, as it was quaintly expressed, " reformed out" ; and
that now, all speaking one language, (and it was well
known that they pronounced English better than the
British, for who could understand a Yorkshire or
Cornish man, or the Yankees, who were too lazy to
use their mouths and spoke through their noses ?) —
now that great object had been obtained, there was an
open field and fair play for all, and their children had
a high destiny before them, and honour and wealth
were their portion.
Here the herald again proclaimed, " The bankit is
now ready, and all ye invited guests will please to fall
to in your places."
Few people are unconsciously flattered, however
delicately the incense may be ofiered ; and this agree-
able and prophetic language I have related, although
artfiilly veiling any thing like broad compliment, was,
notwithstanding its skilful disguises, thoroughly un-
derstood by some of the male part of the audience,
for I heard one old man pronounce it all moonshine,
and another, addressing his little boy, say, " Well,
216 THE OLD JUDOK; OK,
Zacky, you have a-niost a <;raiul iuhcritanci — that's a
fact. Doirt you hope you may live to get it ? Tell
you what — your lot and your luck is, your lot will be
hard work, and your luck to zave wliat you maku. I
hate all fortin-tellers — when they put their liands on
your ribs to tickle you, they are sure to slip their
fingers into your pockets and pick it — they are all
cheats. Look out always fur number one, Zacky, my
boy. Now, here"'s a hint for you — do you go and set
by your mother, for the men always give the women
the best, and the women always help the children
before they eat themselves : so you may guess who
gets the tid bits, Zacky. I have done my part now.
by helping you to advice. Jist you go and ask your
mother to help you to something to eat."
Having found my fair friend, Miss Sally Horn,
we proceeded to the table at the upper end of the
Green, and took our seats, placing her between us,
when a servant of Judge Sandford's spread before us
the contents of a basket he had brought from Elms-
dale, and we enjoyed a capital luncheon. Poor Mr.
John llafuse, not at all approving of the young lady''8
behaviour, and determined to make her feel sensible of
the danircr of losin<r an admii'cr bv such levitv of
manner, refused to make one of the party, and, oll'ering
his arm to another of his fair ac(|uaintances, led her
oft* to the other end of the field. Miss Horn observed
that "pickinick stirs" were stupid tilings, for a lady had
nothing to do but walk up and down, and stare, which
LIFE IN A COLONY. 217
warn't wholesome for weak eyes ; and as for preaching,
as she called the speeches, she could hear enough of
that of a Sunday, but pronounced the repast the best
part of the entertainment, and evinced the sincerity of
what she professed by the justice she did to every
thing placed before her.
" Well, I declare," she exclaimed, " if I haven''t
dined well, it's a pity, for I have been helped to every
thing twice, and five times to blueberry pudding."
" Squire," said a man seated on the opposite side
of the table, and addressing himself to Barclay,
" Squire, may I trouble you for a piece of that 'are
apple-pie to your left there 1" pointing to a large tart,
the top of which had been accidentally crushed.
" With great pleasure," he replied ; and applying a
knife and fork to it, remarked, " I believe you are
under a mistake, sir — this is, I rather think, a pigeon-
pie, and this one must have been the father of the
flock, for my knife makes no impression on liim. I
will give you the whole bird, and you must dissect it
for yourself — here it is f and he raised on his fork, amid
roars of laughter, during which the table was nearly
overturned, a child's shoe, that had been acciden-
tally thrust into it, and lost in the deep and capacious
dish.
" Well, I declare," said Miss Sally, " if that ain't
little Lizzy Fink's shoe ! She has been hopping about
all day with only one on, like a land gosling. If she
hain't put her foot in it, it's a pity ! — don't it beat all
VOL. I. L
218 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
uatur that? I wonder what bu.sine.'^.s children liave to
pickiuick stirs ; they arc for everlastin<^ly a-poking
their noses, or fingers, or feet, into something or an-
other they hadn't ought to."
" Well," continued the old yeoman, with philoso-
phical indifference, " that pumkin-pie to your right will
do as well, for, artcr all, I guess pumkin is about the
king of pies ; but, Squire, how is the Judgc''s pota-
toes I have they escaped the rot ? mine have got some-
thing worse."
" What's that r
" They are actually destroyed by curiosity. Every
critter that passes my field says, I wonder if neighbour
Millet's potatoes have got the disease ; and he pulls
and pulls ever so many hills to see, and then says,
well, that's strange too ; he is the luckiest man in
these parts, he hain't lost one, and the next one that
comes by just does the same thing, and so on till I
have lost just half my crop. 1 vow I will shoot the
first fellow I catch there, and hang him up to scare
away the curious. Thank fortiu, it hain't effected
the Indian corn !" (maize.)
This exclamation was occasioned by the introduc-
tion of a number of dishes of this dehcious vegetable.
In a moment, every one took an car, and, raising it
to his mouth with a hand at each end of it, began to
eat. The colour of the corn, and the manner of hold-
ing, gave the whole company the appearance of a band
jilaying on the flute. It was the most ludicrous sight
LIFE IN A COLONY. 219
I ever beheld. It was a sort of practice in dumb
show.
After Miss Sally had finished two ears of it, she
drew breath, and rested a moment. " Why don^t
you eat ?" she said ; " you had better begin soon, or it
will all be gone f and then, looking at the long white
cob from which she had so expeditiously removed the
grain with her teeth, and holding it admiringly by the
end before she deposited it on the plate, she con-
tinued, " Them cobs are grand for smoking hams or
herrings — nothin' in nature gives the same flavour ;
and as for corking bottles, they are better than
boughten ones. Will you hand me the dish V
" With great pleasure ; but had you not better
take a little wine first V
" Well, I don't care if I do," she replied ; and,
holding a tumbler instead of a glass, observed, " I
like wine better than cider for consart ; it has more
body, and is a more cheerfuller drink, unless the cider
be first frozen down, and then bottled tight with corn
cobs. Here's to you, sir, and wishing you luck.
When you bottle cider, it must be always upended on
its neck, for bottoms are thicker than heads, and ain't
so apt to go ofi" onexpected ; and cider is a wicked
thing to burst. Have you been to Yarmouth lately V
she asked, abruptly.
" Yes, last week."
" Oh, Solomon," she said, " you don't say so !
How glad I am I fell in with you ! Did you see any-
l2
220 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
tiling of old Mr. Sam Horn\s folks down to the mill-
ponds T
As a matter of course, I neither knew nor had heard
of old Mr. Sam Horn or his family, hut, wishing to
hear her out, I replied evasively — " Not recently."
" Well, when you return," she continued, " 1 wish
you would tell them I feel kind of homesick and lone-
some, at the cross-roads — will you ? I think I shall
make tracks homeward soon."
" Why, your folks think you arc a-going to be
married," I said.
" Oh," she replied, with a piteous face, " there is
no such good news, I can tell you. A lady has no
chance of seeing folks there, unless, maybe, such a
chap as John llafuse, and the likes of him, is no great
catch for any likely oall thafs jjot a home of her own.
I^s kinder dull there, and there ain''t no vessels, nor
raisings, nor revivals, nor camp meetings, nor nothing.
Yd rather go back."
" Well, that's what old Mr. Sam Horn said ; he
remarked that he knew you would sooner be among
the bull-frogs in the mill-ponds at Yarmouth, than
amonij the owls of the cross-roads."
" Did he, though ? well, there's a great deal of fun
about the old gentleman, too — ain't there ? ]hit, as I
am a living sinner, if here ain't a fiddle — ain't it
grand ?" and, extricating herself from the table, she
was on her feet in a moment.
Shortly afterwards, the whole company rose, and a
LIFE IN A COLONY. 221
benevolent matron present proposed that what was
left of the viands should be given to the negroes who
were in attendance.
" I guess," said Miss Sally, " you might as well
then butter the table-cloth then, for, excepting the
shoe-pie, which ain"'t fit for no christian to eat, unless
it's a darkey, I don't see there is anything else left.*"
" It would be just as well," retorted the other, with
an offended toss of her head, and not at all relishing
the general laugh raised at her expense, " it would be
just as well perhaps if some young folks know what
was due to their elders and betters, and didn't talk
quite so fast and so pert."
The black musician, to whose superior knowledge
and authority in such matters all deferred, now sum-
moned the young people to take their places on the
green.
" Will you dance V said my fair friend.
I replied, " I am sorry I am obliged to bid you
good bye, and leave you, for I have an engagement
elsewhere, this being altogether an unexpected pleasure
to me. But pray dance with your friend Mr. Rafuse,
who I see has returned : he seems hurt at your
neo;lect."
" Who cares ?" she said ; "if he don't like it, he
may lump it. Tell you what — if John Rafiise was
down to the mill-ponds to Yarmouth among the
ponders, they would call him Eefuse, and that's the
poorest sort of boards they have in all their lumber.
222 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
Well, I am soriy you are a-going, too. There is
grand shooting to the cross-roads, I have heam
Hannah's husband say, only people are too lazy to
shoot. If you will come there, I will oet him to rrive
you a rolling frolic, for he has got one on hand, and
promised me a treat before I go home. Til hold back
for you. Oh, it's fun alive, you may depend ! — but
pickinick stirs are as heavy as dough — more trouble
to come and to go and to carry things than they are
worth, and dancing on the ground is hard work, and,
besides, it don't seem kinder natural in the day-time,
and so many folks looking on, and making their re-
marks, who have nothing to do with it kinder, puts a
wet blanket on it. Oh, a rolling frolic is just what
you would like, for it's sociable and onformal ; or, if
you can't come, next time you go to Yarmouth, just
give us a call to old Mr. Sam Horn's to the mill-
ponds. It's a most a beautiful place. It's generally
allowed to take the shine off this province, I tell you.
You won't forget to give us a call, will you? The
old gentleman will be very proud to see you, and
I'll "
The order of the musician was imperative ; and
Mr. Rafuse several times reminded the talkative lady
that she was keeping the company waiting.
" Don't be in such a plaguy pecky hurry,"" she an-
swered sharply. " If you can't wait, get another
partner. Don't you see, I am bidding good bye to the
stranger? manners before measures."
LIFE IN A COLONY. 223
" Pray don"'t detain him," I said. " Mr. Barclay
and I will be at the cross-roads next week, if the
weather is favourable, and spend a day or two there
shooting."
" And the rolling frolic ?" she inquired doubtfully.
" Oh, certainly, I shall be delighted to accept your
kind invitation. Good bye, till we meet again."
" Then, I may depend T
" Certainly, I shall only be too happy."
" Come, now, I like that," she said, " you are the
rael grit, every inch of you. Seeing you*'re a touch
above common, I was afraid you would be too proud,
maybe, to come among the like of us poor folks.
Thank you, sir. Good bye ! mind next week. And
now, John, how sorry I am I kept you waiting so
long ! What''s become of Nabby Frisk I seed you
with just now ? She looks as yaller as a kite"'s foot.
What's that tune, Pompey, you are a-playing ? Is it
' Off she goes to Mirimishee V "
" No, miss, ifs ' Come tickle my nose with a barley
straw.' "
" Oh, my !" she replied, pressing both her hands
on her sides, and laughing most immoderately —
' Tickle my nose with a barley straw V well, if that
name don't bang the bush ! — it caps all."
The young people were now all in motion ; but such
a dance ! It was a serious business affair. Every-
body maintained a profound silence, and the only
voice to be heard was that of the black fiddler, who
224 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
gave out the figures in a loud tone, that was distinctly
audible over the screaming notes of the violin, while
the dancers seemed most anxious to execute such steps
as they know with the greatest exactness and agility.
In describing this scene, I have preferred giving the
greater parts of the dialogue with Miss Horn to re-
cording the general conversation of the tables, because,
as this sketch is faithfully drawn from nature, it will
convey to the reader an accurate idea of the class to
which she belono-ed.
Taking Barclay's arm, I now strolled to the other
end of the glade previous to returning to Elmsdale.
This portion of the company had also left the tables,
and were scattered in detached groups ; some packing
up preparatory to leaving the place, and others listen-
ing attentively to a man who was denouncing those
who had profaned the place with wine and dancing.
He was a tall, thin, cadaverous-looking man, whose
long black hair, falling wildly over his shoulders, gave
liis face a ghastly appearance, while his wild and wan-
dering eye imparted to it a fearful expression. He
appeared to be labouring both under great excitement
and a considerable impediment of speech which aftected
his respiration, so as to contract and expand his cheeks
and sides, and make the indraught and exit of his
breath distressingly audible. Nothing could bo more
painful than to witness his convulsive utterance, un-
less it was to hear his dreadful lanijuaire. He con-
signed all those who were not members of Temperance
LIFE IN A COLONY. 225
Societies to everlasting perdition, without the sHghtest
compunction, and invoked an early fulfilment of his
imprecations upon them. Occasionally, he would ter-
minate a period with a long unmeaning alliteration,
calling dancing a profanation of an ordination that led
to damnation, or point his harangue against wine-
drinkers, by observing, that they think it fine to drink
wine like swine ; but theyll repine, they'll repine.
Turning in disgust from this profane and uncharit-
able discourse, we crossed the lawn in the direction of
the post road. On our way, we met two young
women looking about them in great trouble and per-
plexity. As soon as they perceived us, one of them
approached, and, addressing herself to me, said,
" Pray, sir, did you see a beast down there V pointing
to the part of the lawn we had just left. Although
I should never have thought of the word brute, or
beast, as applicable to the wretched man I had been
listening to, I was not at all surprised at the terrified
girl using it, knowing that the population of rural
districts derive most of their epithets from the objects
about them.
" I have indeed seen a strange animal there," I
said.
" Was he a black beast, sir V
" Long black hair," I replied, " and a wild and
wicked expression of eye."
" Did you take notice of his feet, sir V she inquired
anxiously.
L 5
226 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
I now perceived, by this reference to the cloven foot,
that the poor girl either thought he was the devil in
2)7'oprid persona, or was possessed of one. " Don''t be
alarmed," I said. " I didn't observe his feet."
" Had he a long black tail, and a cushion strapped
on behind for carrying a gall on ?"
Here Barclay, who had been enjoying my mistake,
came to the rescue. " You have lost your horse, I
suppose."
" Yes, sir, our beast has broke his bridle, and made
tracks. I only hope he ain't raced off home."
" Had he four white feet V
" Yes, sir."
" Ah, then, he's quietly grazing below the crowd.
Where is the bridle I — Ah, here it is. Make your-
self easy ; I will restore him to you in a moment."
On his return, the two girls were adjusted into their
seats ; one riding in front on a man's saddle, the other
behind, but on the opposite side of the horse.
" I agree with your friend. Miss Sally Horn," said
Barclay ; " pic-nics are stupid things, under any cir-
cumstances, but doubly so, when attempted by country
people, who do not understand them, are destitute of the
resources furnished by education for conversation and
amusement, and to whom unoccupied time is always
wearisome. Merrimaking in America, except in towns
or new settlements, is a sad misnomer, when applied
to such matters ; the religion of the country, which
is puritanical, is uncongenial to it ; dissent is cold and
LIFE IN A COLONY. 227
gloomy, and represses the cheerfulness of youth, and the
buoyancy of healthful spirits. The people are not fond
of music, and are strangers to theatrical amusements ;
and, being dispersed over a great surface of country,
instead of dwelling in villages or hamlets, as in
Europe, have little opportunity for convivial inter-
course; while the exigencies of a northern climate,
and the hardships and privations of forest life, leave
but little time for relaxation. They are a business
and matter-of-fact people. ' Raisings,' which mean
the erection of the frames of wooden houses, are
everywhere performed by mechanics, except in new
settlements. ' Log rolling,' which is the process of
heaping together the trunks of trees that have been
felled preparatory to being burned, so as to clear the
land for cultivation, and 'the Bee,' which is the
gathering of people for the purpose of chopping down
the forest, or for harvesting, or some other friendly
act for a neighbourhood, are all, in like manner, peculiar
to remote places.
" When any of these occasions occur", they are fol-
lowed by festivities of a totally different character
from those in the old settlements. In proportion as
the country becomes more densely peopled, these acts
of mutual assistance, rendered necessary in the first
instance by the individual weakness and mutual wants
of all, become more and more rare, and finally cease
altogether, and with them, merrimakings cease also.
Festive assemblies occur now only in towns, or the
228 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
midst of the woods : so true in all thin2;s is the old
maxim — 'extremes meet/ In that portion of the
country where these j^ood old ' Raisings,"' ' Bees,""
' Log-rollings,"' and other cordial and friendly meetings
have died out, nothing has arisen in their place to in-
duce or require a celebration. The formal manners of
the town sits awkwardly on the farmer ; its customs
and fashions neither suit his means nor his condition.
Unwilling to be thought rustic and vulgar, he has
abandoned the warm-hearted junketing of old ; and,
unable to accommodate himself to city usages, which
he sees so seldom as not thoroughly to understand, he
has little or no recreation to give his family ; a cold
hospitality that acquires ostentation, in proportion as
it loses cordiality, gradually supervenes. The charac-
ter and appearance of the man undergo a sad change ;
the jolly, noisy yeoman, becomes a melancholy-looking
man ; his temper is gradually soured by the solitude
and isolation in which he lives, and, resorting to poli-
tics and religion for excitement, he rushes to the
wildest extremes in both, howling for nights together
in the protracted meetings of revivals, or raving with
equal zeal and ignorance about theories of govern-
ment.
'• The injurious effects upon the health, occasioned by
the absence of all amusement, and the substitution of
fanaticism, or polities in its place, is not confined to
the male part of the population. It falls still heavier
on the females. The former have their field labours
LIFE IN A COLONY. 229
to detain them all day in the fresh air ; the latter are
confined to the house and its close and unwholesome
atmosphere, and suffer in proportion. No merry laugh
rings on the ear of the anxious mother, no song glad-
dens her heart, no cheerftil dance of joyous youth
reflects the image of the past, or gives a presage of a
happy future. Sadness, suffering, or discontent, is
legible on the face. Silence or fretfulness pervades
the house. The home is not happy.
" I am glad you have arranged to go to the cross-
roads next week. You will at once see the effect of
merrimakings and cheerfulness, not only on the health
and looks, but upon the bearing and character of the
population. The Judge says ' Exercise is health,"' but
he is mistaken ; cheerfulness is an essential ingredient,
and where that does not spring from a well-regulated
mind, as it does among educated people, amusement,
in some shape or other, is absolutely indispensable."
230 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
CHAPTER IX.
THE SCHOOLMASTER;
OR, THE UECKE THALER.
Ou our return to Elmsdale, the absurd scene of the
morning was adverted to, and the extraordinary man-
ner in which the people were flattered and hiuded by
the orators of Illinoo.
" That," said the Judge, " is the inevitable result
of the almost universal suffrage that exists in this
province. People accommodate themselves to their
audience ; and, where the lower orders form the ma-
jority of electors, their vanity is appealed to, and not
their judgment — their passions, and not their reason ;
and the mass, instead of being elevated in the scale
of intelligence by the exercise of political power, is
lowered by the delusion and craft, of which it is made
the willing victim. Nova Scotians have been so often
assured that they are the ablest, the wisest, and best
of men, though their rulers are both ignorant and
corrupt, and that they have a rich and fertile c<mntry,
blessed with a climate more salubrious and agreeable
than that of any other part of the world, they begin
to think that law and not industry, government and
not enterprise, is all that is wanting for the full enjoy-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 231
meut of these numerous advantages. If any man were
to say to them that their winters are long and severe,
their springs late, cold, and variable, while much of
their soil is wet, stony, or unproductive, and that toil
and privation are the necessary incidents of such a
condition ; or venture to assert that, although the
province abounds with mineral wealth, skill, capital,
and population are necessary to its successful develop-
ment; or, that, although the innumerable streams
that intersect the country in every direction are admi-
rably adapted for manufactories, the price of labour
is yet too high to render such speculations safe or
profitable ; and, above all, to tell them that they are
idle, conceited, and ignorant ; and, so long as they
maintain this character, they merit all their poverty
and all their wretchedness ; these demagogues, to
whom you listened yesterday, would call him a rabid
tory, a proud aristocrat, an enemy to the people, a
vile slanderer, and a traitor to his country.
"It is a melancholy condition of things ; and, so
long as education is so grievously neglected as it is at
present, there appears to be no hope of a change for
the better. The British Government, with that fore-
sio-lit and liberality which has always distinguished
it in its treatment of the colonies, founded, many
years ago, a- college at Windsor, an interior town,
situated about forty-five miles from Halifax, which
has been of incalculable advantage, not merely to
Nova Scotia, but to British North America. The
232 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
system of common school instruction, on the contrary,
which depends upon ourselves, is founded chiefly on
the voluntary principle, which has proved as defective
in education as it always has in religion. When a
man fails in his trade, or is too lazy to work, he re-
sorts to teaching as a livelihood, and the school-house,
like the asylum for the poor, receives all those who
are, from misfortune or incapacity, unable to provide
for themselves. The wretched teacher has no home ;
he makes the tour of the settlement, and resides, a
stipulated number of days, in every house — too short
a time for his own comfort, and too long for that of
the family, who can but ill afford either the tax or the
accommodation. He is among them, but not of them.
His morning is past in punishing the idleness of others,
his evening in being punished for his own ; for all
are too busy to associate with him. His engagement
is generally for a short period. He looks forward to
its termination with mingled feelings of hope and fear
— in alternate anticipations of a change for the better,
or destitution from want of employment. His heart
is not in his business, and his work prospers indiffer-
ently. He is then succeeded by another, who changes
the entire system, and spends his whole time in what
he calls rectifying the errors of his predecessor. The
school is then unhappily too often closed for want of
energy or union among the people ; the house is
deserted and neglected, the glass is broken by the
children, who regard it as a prison. The door, after
LIFE IN A COLONY. 233
a long but unsuccessftil struggle with the wind, falls,
at last, in the conflict ; the swine then enter, for pro-
tection, from the violence or heat of the weather, and
retain possession until expelled by the falling roof,
or the rod of a new master. It is evident, therefore,
that ' the orreatest, wisest, and best of mankind' either
do not need instruction, having the wonderful good
fortune to possess knowledge intuitively, or else the
rest of the human family, whom they are so often told
they far excel, must indeed be in a state of hopeless
and wretched ignorance."
The following day, as we were strolling through
Bridge Port, a small, straggling village, situated about
a mile and a half above Elmsdale, the subject was
again accidentally renewed by our hearing the piercing
cries of a poor little urchin, who was undergoing the
punishment of the rod in the schoolhouse. As Bridge
Port aspires to the honour of being called a town,
and its ambitious inhabitants entertain sanguine hopes
that it will one day rival Illinoo in importance, this
building exhibits much pretension, having a belfry
surmounted by a gilt weather-vane, which, though it
does not indicate the direction of the wind, being
stationary, either from accident or for the purpose of
displaying the broad, glittering side of a golden
quill at its top, fulfils all that it was designed for, by
ornamenting the village. So handsome a structure,
deserving a classical name, is dignified by the appel-
lation of Academy. It was from this seat of learning
234? THE OLD JUDGE : OR,
tliat the young student's voice was heard complaining
of the thorny paths of literature.
" Ah, my good friend, Mr. Enoch Pike," said the
Judge, soliloquizing in reference to the teacher, " if you
had ever been in the army, you would have become
more indulgent by learning that the tables are some-
times turned, and the master punished himself. I
recollect," he said, addressing himself to me, " when
the Duke of Kent was commander-in-chief at Halifax,
going to the barracks to see an officer of the Fusileers,
and, as 1 passed the regimental school-room on my
way upstairs to the quarters of my friend, I found all
the children vociferating at the top of their voices,
almost wild with excitement and delight. ' Ah ! my
little fellows,"" I said, ' so you have a holiday to-day,
have you V — ' Oh, yes, sir,' several of them answered
at once, ' oh, yes, sir, master has been flogged to-day ;
he has just received three hundred lashes.""
"Ho who needs foririveuess himself ouijht to be
merciful to others. I have several times spoken to
Pike about his severity, and recommended to him
more forbearance, but he always has one answer.
Thinking to pacify me by avowing himself a conser-
vative, he invariably commences : ' Ah, Judge, when
I first took charge of this Academy, I was a Radical,
a thorough-going Radical ; but I soon found a school
required a good strict Tory government. Freedom
and equality sound prettily in theory, but they don""!
work well in practice. You, who have presided in
LIFE IN A COLONY. 235
courts of justice, and I, who have presided in seats of
learning, know that nothing but a stern air and a
strong arm will preserve order/ — ' Oh, yes,' I reply,
' that is all very well — but strictness is one thing,
and severity another. You must be moderate. Pa-
tience is a cardinal virtue in an instructor ."* — ' Oh, sir,'
he says, ' I am the most patient man in the world,
but there is a point — there is a line, you know, sir,
beyond which, ahem ! — there is a limit — a bound —
a terminus you may call it — a place where you must
stop. They talk about the patience of Job, Judge.
I have read every thing about that illustrious man
with great care, sir ; and, in my humble opinion, his
patience was never fairly tried. Job never was a
schoolmaster. Judge — oh, no ! oh, no ! he can't be said
to have been fairly tried. Job never kept a school.
Corporeal punishment. Judge, either in schools or the
army, cannot be dispensed with. We say, and say
truly, the rod of the empire ! I have often asked
myself with Virgil, Quid domini facient — What shall
masters do without the birch ? and answer with Ovid,
Principiis obsta — Nip an offence in the bud ; or with
Horace, Quicquid prcecipies esto hreve — Let it be a
word and a blow. All antiquity is in its favour, and
Solomon recommends a liberal use of it. Spare it,
says he, and you spoil the child. The quantity of
flogging is very properly left to the discretion of the
master ; the true rule, perhaps, is, Nocturnd versate
manu nersate diurnd — Turn tbem up and whip them
23G THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
by day or night when needed, not urging them too
fast, but keeping a steady rein. Festina lent^ — An
even travelling gait is the proper course. In this
manner, he runs on, making tlie most absurd appli-
cation possible of his quotations, and regularly talks
me down, so that I am glad to drop tiie subject, and
quit the house.
" They have had a strange set of masters here :
one was a universal genius, and converted his school
into a sort of workshop. He painted signs and sign-
boards, gilded frames, repaired watches and guns, made
keys in place of missing ones, veneered bones and
tables, cut and lettered tomb-stones, and was devoted
to carving and turning. He prided himself upon being
able to execute any difficult little job, that exceeded
the skill of anybody else in the country. He pre-
ferred every thing to teaching, and his scholars pre-
ferred him to every other master ; for it seemed to be
a fixed principle with him not to trouble them if they
would observe the same forbearance towards him.
But the parents, not approving of this amicable treaty,
refused to ratify it, and he was discharged, to the
great grief of the young men, and the infinite loss of
all young ladies who had brooches, lockets, or bracelets
to mend.
" Universal Smith was universally regretted. His
successor, though equally engaged for others, was a
totally different person. Instead of mending and
patching up things for his neighbours, he made more
LIFE IN A COLONY. 237
breaches than Universal Smith could have soldered or
welded together again in a long life. He set the
people by the ears ; and, when he failed in an attempt
to separate friends, got up a little quarrel with them
on his own account. He piqued himself on his know-
ledge of law, and advised tenants to overbold, and
landlords to distrain, and, being a talebearer, was a
great promoter of actions of defamation, in which he
was generally a witness, and attested to different
words from those laid in the declaration, whereby
his friends were nonsuited, and his foes escaped.
He induced several persons who were indifferently
honest to expose their roguery by endeavouring to
evade the payment of their just debts, by availing
themselves of the benefit of the statute of limita-
tions. Even his boys were set against each other,
so that scarcely any two of them were upon speaking
terms.
" At that time, there was a female school held in
one end of the apartment, which was divided into two
rooms by a temporary wooden screen. This afforded
too good an opportunity for hostilities to be neglected,
and he, accordingly, attempted to drive away the
teacher and her children by resorting to every petty
annoyance and insult in his power ; but, finding their
endurance superior to his patience, he commenced a
regular system of encroachment. He was always at
his post an hour before the school commenced, during
which time the partition was advanced a few inches,
238 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
until he succeeded in thrustinj; tlicni out and cncfros-
siuir the whole buildin";.
" He was a constant contributor to a scurrilous
newspaper, published at Illinoo, in which he misrepre-
sented the motives and conduct of every gentleman
in the neighbourhood, and, as is always the case with
people of this description, seemed to take peculiar
pleasure in abusing those to whom he was most in-
debted for personal or pecuniary kindness. At last,
he managed to quarrel with the boys, their parents,
and, finally, the trustees of the school ; which ended,
first, in his dismissal, and then in a lawsuit, that
terminated, in his ruin and sudden disappearance from
the place.
" After this, the school was closed for some time,
for want of a master, when a stranger presented him-
self as a candidate, and was accepted. Mr. Welcome
Shanks (for such was his name) was one of the most
extraordinary-looking men I ever beheld. He was
very tall, and, though his frame was large and mus-
cular, exceedingly thin. His back, either from the
constant habit of stooping, or from a rheumatic aftoc-
tion so common in this country, was almost circular,
and had the effect of throwinij his lonir bony arms for-
ward, which looked as if they were still growing, and
in time would reach the ground, and enable him to
travel upon all-fours. His face was hard, hollow, and
pale, having an anxious and careworn expression, that
indicated either nKiital or bodily suffering. His eye
LIFE IN A COLONY. 239
was bright and intelligent, but restless, as was liis
head, which he kept continually but slowly moving
from side to side. He was attired in a suit of old,
rustj black, which, though almost threadbare, and
showing evident marks of successive repairs, was scru-
pulously neat. He wore a white, Quaker-looking hat,
having a brim of more than usual dimensions, the
fronts of which was bent downwards, so as effectually
to protect his face, and especially his eyes, from the
strong light of the sun. His queue gave an inexpres-
sibly droll eff"ect to his figure, for he carried his head
and neck so much lower than his shoulders, that it
6ould not reach his back, but, resting on the cape of
his coat, stood up almost in a perpendicular direction,
and suggested the idea of its being the handle of the
protruding arms, or the root to which they were in-
debted for their extraordinary length.
" His manner was shv and reserved ; he held but
little intercourse with any one, appearing to have but
two topics of conversation in which he took any inte-
rest, namely, piracy, and the history of the early set-
tlement of the province by the French, their subse-
quent expulsion, and cruel dispersion in the other
colonies, to every detail of which he listened with the
greatest eagerness. He was accustomed to take long
and solitary walks, upon which occasions it was ob-
served he was armed with a huge club, which was
accidentally discovered to be hollow, and to contain
something of a smaller size within it, generally sup-
240 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
posed to be a rapier, or dagger, lie also carried about
with him, wherever lie went, a thin, but broad tin
case, containing a pocket-book, which he would often
take out during school hours, and attentively study,
occasionally altering or making additions to what ap-
peared to be written in it.
" The story of the hollow cane, or sword-stick, filled
the school with wonder and fear, which the mysterious
case and black book raised to the highest pitch. His
scholars, however, soon perceived the danger of ap-
proaching him when thus engaged ; for, though at other
times the gentlest and most patient of beings, he be-
came furious, and almost frantic, if disturbed in the
apparently abstruse calculations of this magical book,
seizin"- the thouo-htless offender bv the collar, with liis
giant arm, and swinging liim round and round in the
air with fearful rapidity, gnashing his teeth the
while, and accompanying these gyrations with dread-
ful threats of vengeance. These outbursts of passion
were of a violent character, but happily of short dura-
tion. They ceased as suddenly as they arose, when
he would place the culprit on his feet, and, patting
him tenderly and affectionately on his head, say,
' Don't interrupt me, my son, when 1 am at my
j^tiidies — it agitates me.' His size, his strength, his
o-enerally calm and imperturbable temper, and occa-
sional fits of fury, ensured implicit obedience, and the
silence, order, and diligence, observed in his school,
excited the astonishment of everybody.
LIFE IN A COLONY, 241
" One day, just as he had finished a diagram, and
entered it in his pocket-book, he was suddenly sent for
by a passenger in the mail-coach that passed through
Bridge Port, who desired to see him for a few minutes
at the inn. In his haste to join his friend, he forgot
his mysterious manuscript and its case, both which
lay on his table, in full view of the boys. In a mo-
ment, all eyes were turned on those objects of wonder.
' The book — the book !' was whispered round the
school ; but, such was the awe inspired by the man,
and everything that belonged to him, that for a time
no one ventured to leave his seat. At last, a sentinel
was placed at the door, in order to give notice of his
return ; a consultation held; and one more bold than
the rest, with palpitating heart and trembling hands,
opened the fearful volume. ' Ah V he exclaimed, ' it's
all magic — look here, boys ! Ah ! you are afraid,
are you ! — then keep your places : it's filled with
magical figures, and the writing and all is in magic.
I cant make head or tail of it !' Then, taking up the
tin case, he drew, from the opposite end to that which
usually contained the book, a measuring tape, a long
cord, with a bullet fastened to the end of it, a box of
phosphorus-matches, and a small travelling pocket-
compass. ' Here's the things to make the magic ring
with, boys ! — wouldn't you like to see him do it ?
Who's afeerd 1 I ain't. I'd give anything to see the
Devil.' — ' Here he is !' said the sentinel. ' Who ?
Who V shouted the boy, in great alarm . ' Wh}-, the
VOL. I. M
212 THE OLD JUDCSE ; OR,
master, to bo sure/ replied the other; 'wlio dkl you
suppose it was V — ' Oh, my sakes !' said the little
boaster, ' liow you scared mc ! I actilly thought it
was the Devil himself agoing to take me at my word !""
and, hastily replacing the things where he had found
them, he withdrew to his seat.
" NV'hen Shanks returned to his desk, and saw the
book and the case lying exposed on the table, he
turned suddenly pale. He clinched his fist, and
strode up and down the room with great rapidity,
glaring on the boys like a tiger, with a searching look,
as if selecting a victim for pouncing upon. In a few
moments, the paroxysm, as usual, passed oft". He sat
calmly down, and, taking up the book, examined it
carefully page by page, when he suddenly paused, and,
looking attentively at something that attracted his
attention, held up the writing to the light, first in one
direction and then in another, and finally applied a
magnifying-glass to it, when he pointed to the boy
who had called him a magician, and said, ' John
Parker, come forward. How dare vou meddle with
my property, sir, in my absence?" — ' I didn't,' replied
the boy, with the c;reatest assurance. ' T haven"'t been
oft' my seat.' — ' You did, sir V rejoined the master, in
a voice of tli under. ' I appeal to every scholar pre-
sent ; and if they all were to lie as you have done, and
say that you did not touch this book, I wouldn't be-
lieve them. The name of Two Thumb Parker is written
liere in your own hand. Vou are your own accuser.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 213
and have borne testimony against yourself. Leave
me, sir — leave me, instantly, while I am calm, and
don't return aoain ! Go !' and, raisins; his voice, and
stamping passionately on the floor, he shouted out,
' Go ! go !' when the terrified boy, recovering from
the stupefaction into which he had been thrown by the
marvellous discovery of his name and guilt, suddenly
bolted out of the room, without waiting for his hat or
coat, and hurried homeward, with all possible speed.
The truth is, the unfortunate urchin had a very re-
markable thumb on his right hand. It was only half
the usual length, and was divided from the last joint
outwards into two parts, each being perfect, and having
a nail upon it, from whence he was called ' Two Thumb
Parker/ While holding the open book in his hand,
he unconsciously left the impression of his deformed
and soiled thumb on the leaf, which the master not
inaptly denominated 'his name written by his own
hand.'
" The secret was known only to Shanks ; but the
story of the magical book, of the Devil entering the
bov's name in it, and of the tin case, with its contents,
circulated far and wide over the whole country. Other
peculiarities in his conduct increased and confirmed
the general suspicion with which he was surrounded.
He had a remarkable-looking old silver dollar, that
he called his ' Heche Thaler^'' two magical words, of
which he never could be induced to explain the mean-
ing. He would often take it from his pocket, and ex-
M 2
244 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
amine it with as much care and minuteness as if he
liad never seen it before, and then poise it on the point
of one of the finders of his left hand, strike it with the
blade of a knife, or ring it on the stove, and listen to
its tones, with the greatest deliijht. Whenever he
saw dollars in other people"'s possession, he invariably
entreated to be permitted to examine them, and com-
pare them with his own, expressing the greatest
anxiety to procure one exactly similar, in all respects,
to that to which he was so much attached, and offered
a large sum to any one that would procure him its
counterpart.
" All schools throughout the country are closed
at twelve oVlock on Saturday, which is invariably
considered a half holiday. He deviated from this
custom, by giving the boys the entire day ; and,
whenever the weather permitted, always left the vil-
lage on Friday afternoon, habited in a suit of strong,
coarse homespun, carrying a large and heavy knap-
sack on his shoulders, and the ominous hollow walking
cane in his hand — a useless and inconvenient thing in
the woods, and one with which no other man would
encumber himself. V\'hither he went, or how he oc-
cupied himself, no one could tell — all that was known
was, that he invariably took the same route into the
forest, walking at a rapid rate, and never returned
airain until Mondav morning, about ciLrht o'clock, in
time to open his school, greatly fatigued and ex-
hausted.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 245
" I have already observed that, when he presented
himself as a candidate for the situation of master of
the academy at Bridge Port, he was a stranger. No
one knew who or what he was, or whence he came,
although, from his accent, manner, and habits, it was
thought probable that he was either a Nova Scotian,
or a native of the New England States. A residence
of several months among the people did not enlighten
the curious upon these points, and public opinion was
much divided as to the real nature of his character.
Some thought him to be a spy in the employment of
France, a suspicion encouraged by the fact that he
had several French books descriptive of British North
America, and one in particular, written by a Jesuit
priest, (Charleroix) containing numerous maps of the
harbours, coasts, and rivers of the country, and also
by the minute inquiries he made about the removal of
the Acadians. Others believed he was eno-atred in
devising or executing some extensive plan of robbery ;
for his landlady, unable to endure the oppression of
her curiosity, had opened, by the aid of a neighbour's
key, a wooden chest of his, while he was absent at
school, and discovered in it a dark lantern, a crowbar,
a cold chisel, and a hatchet, as well as other tools
suitable for breaking into houses. But the better
opinion appeared to be that he was a magician, and
was in league with the powers of darkness. His
pocket-book, the contents of the tin case, the HecJce
Tlialer^ and, lastly, a crucible and some charcoal, found
24() THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
in his client, togetlier with some extraordinary-looking
fossils, which were no doubt ' Philosopher's Stones,'
seemed to put tlie matter beyond all dispute. If
further corroboration were needed, his face furnished
it, by the expression it wore of care and anxiety ; for,
as it was shrewdly observed, although the Devil im-
parts knowledge and wealth to his votaries, he is a
stranger to happiness himself, and cannot confer it
upon others.
" No man was ever so unconscious of the feelinffs
and suspicions he had given rise to as poor Welcome
Shanks : loving solitude, and avoiding society, he was
not aware that he was avoided himself. The awe with
which lie was regarded rather flattered liis vanity
than awakened his apprehensions, tor he mistook it
for respect for his great erudition and unimpeachable
character. Poor man ! he thouirht if he had a secret,
it was his own, and he had a right to keep it. Had
he mixed more with the world, he would have found
that it is an offence against society at large, for a man
to presume to have a secret at all, unless the fact of
his having it be carefully concealed also.
'* No avowed secret ever was permitted to be re-
tained inviolate ; even the freemasons liave had theirs
disclosed. A lady once told me, she had discovered
it, after years of anxious perseverance ; and, as it was
one of the most singular mysteries in the world, she
would communicate it to me. She said she had ffiven
her husband no peace by day or night, until he re-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 247
vealed it. She had coaxed him with endearments,
teased hira with importunities, tormented him with
annoyances, and entrapped him when unguarded ;
and, finally, extorted from him the disclosure, which
was, that in reality there was no secret, after all, there
being, in fact, nothing to tell. Many consultations
were held by the people, as to the best mode of making
him give some account of himself; and at last it was
decided to have him apprehended, and examined before
a magistrate, but the difficulty was to find a charge that
would justify his arrest. While this embarrassing
subject was under consideration, he saved them the
trouble of proceeding any further in the matter, by
relinquishing the school and quitting the place.
" A few evenings previous to his departure, he
called at my house, and, sending in his name, begged
the favour of a private interview. After carefully
closing the study-door, and looking round the room, to
ascertain that we were alone, and out of the hearing
of others, he said, ' Judge, I have discovered that there
is a treasure buried in this estate,' — ' I know it,' I said.
— ' Ah,'' he replied, his countenance beaming with joy,
' ah, I am right, then ! I knew I could not be mis-
taken. When, and by whom was it hidden, sir i — I
will not ask you where, for that I have discovered
already."* — ' By my father and myself: we have sunk
more money, in clearing, cultivating, and improving
Elmsdale, than would purchase it twice over ; but that
money neither you nor I will ever my find, my friend."'
248 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
'' His face sudtlenly became overcast with au ex-
pression of disappointment and mortification. I had
unintentional!}-, it seemed, wounded his feelings, by
subjecting him and liis theory to what he considered
ridicule. ' Will you permit me to dig for the trea-
r^ure where I know it to be V — ' Certainly,"" I replied ;
' you may dig wherever you please, provided you do
rne no damage, and do not disfigure my grounds/ —
' What proportion will you require as owner of tlie
soil V — ' You are welcome to all you can find. I only
ask the privilege of a friend, to advise you to save
yourself the trouble. It is impossible there can be
any hidden treasure on this property. It never was
inhabited, previous to our occupation, but by Indians,
who, we all know, had neither gold nor silver, and by
the French Acadians, who were almost equally poor.
Tiiey were mere peasants, who lived on the produc-
tions of their farms, while the little trade they had,
either with each other or the savages, was conducted
by barter. They had nothing to bury."* — ' Pardon
me,'' he said ; ' many had not, but some had money —
so my information goes — and I can rely upon it.*' —
' Yes, large sums of money for conducting the fur
trade with France; although I must admit that this
district is not rich in treasure.' — ' But Chester Bay,
.ludcTc — Chester Bav, Judire !' and he straitened him-
self for the first time, 1 believe, since he came to
Bridcje Port ; and exhibited his great height and
manly frame to such advantage, that he seemed as if
LIFE IN A COLONY. 249
he had been suddenly transformed into anotl)er being.
' Chester Bay, Judge, is the place for treasure. Mil-
lions were buried there by the pirates j whole cargoes
of Spanish galleons, coin and bullion, jewels, precious
stones, and wealth untold, I am on the track of it
at last — a few weeks more, and it is mine : where the
rod first pointed, it now bends down as if to touch it.
But the propitious time of night is now come, and,
by your leave, kind sir, I will go and dig for this
Frenchman"'s money,' and, seizing his hat, disappeared
from the room.
" Shortly afterwards, we were disturbed by a violent
knocking at the door, and my servant was not a little
alarmed at finding the unwelcome visitor seekino- ad-
mission ao-ain at so late an hour. ' Show me into
your raaster"'s study," he said. ' Judge,' he exclaimed,
' I have found it ! I have found it ! it was concealed
under the root of an old tree. Here it is ! — but you
were right, sir, in saying the Acadians were generally
peasants. This was the saving of a poor man, for it is
chiefly in small silver pieces."'
" He then unstrapped his knapsack, and, taking
from it a rusty old tin kettle, removed the cover, and
exposed to view a quantity of silver shillings, sixpences,
Spanish pistareens, and quarter and half dollars, amount-
ing, in all, to about seventy-five pounds. — ' This is not
the property of the French,' I said, after examining a
number of the different coins : ' the Acadians were
transported from this country in the year 1755 j but
M 5
250 THE OLD JlDCiK; OR,
nearly all this money bears a subsequent date ; I
think that I know to whom this packai^e belonged."* —
' Ah,' he observed, with a sad but decided tone, and
an air of grievous disappointment, ' if there is an owner,
I will restore it : treasure-trove — I think that is the
word, Judge — treasure-trove in this country, where
the King makes no claim, is the property of the
finder, but treasure lost belongs to the owner — it must
be restored.""
" ' About thirty years ago,"" I said, ' there was a
knife-grinder wandering about the country, who was
always in the habit of getting drunk on Saturday
night, on which occasion his wife very prudently hid
his money, lest he should squander more of it than he
could aft'ord. Once she hid it so effectually, that she
could never find it again, and loud and long were the
lamentations of the poor people over their lost property.
She always believed that it had been stolen by some
person who had observed her concealing it. The follow-
ing year they were both drowned, by the upsetting of a
ferry-boat, where the bridge now stands at the village.
They were strangers unconnected with, and unknown
to, anybody in the province, and have long since been
forgotten. Can you show me the spot where this
money was found V — ' Certainly,"" he replied ; and,
taking out the mysterious pocket-book, he showed me
a .sketch of the stump. — ' I always mark places,"* he
observed, ' where the hazel wand points to metallic
substances, and take their bearings by measurements
LIFE IN A COLONY. 251
to other objects, so that I can find them again. My
observations are all entered in a cipher of my own in-
vention, for fear of losing my book and disclosing my
secret.'' — ' Will you show me your wandf — ' Cer-
tainly ; here it is ;"* and, unscrewing the top of his
cane, he drew out the prophetic hazel — ' Ah, sir,"* he
exclaimed, with evident satisfaction and pride, ' this is
a beautiful wand — a real German hazel from Upper
Saxony — it is as true as a load-stone. — How truly it
indicated this treasure ; and it points as decidedly to
that of the pirates, which, by God's blessing and the
aid of this little windfall of money, I hope to reach
soon. That wand. Judge, and this inestimable Heche
Thaler^ showing me the renowned old silver dollar,
' cost me a great deal of money — all that I was worth
in the world at the time, a very large sum for a poor
man, but a mere trifle for such invaluable things — I
gave a thousand dollars for them.**
"'Pray, what is a HecJce Thaler?'' I inquired, 'I
never heard the term before.' — ' A Hecke Thaler,
Judge, is a sympathetic dollar. Everything in nature,
animate and inanimate, is endowed with sympathy.
In the animal world, it exists in sex ; in the mineral
world, in kindred, affinity, or identity. This dollar
is know^n to be sympathetic. It has been proved to
be so in Germany. If a kindred or identical dollar
can be found of equal purity and texture, size, and
density, and brought into contact with tlie sympathy
of this one, they can produce a third dollar, and so
•).-;9
'1-y'l THE OLD JUDOE ; OR,
ou ad Jinitum, from which woiKhrful power it derives
its name of Ilecke Thaler, or Hatcliiiii; Dollar. It is
one of th(> mysteries of nature that science cannot
explain or imitate — one of the iimumerable wonders
with which an inscrutable Providence surrounds us on
all sides, though, in reality, no more strange or mira-
culous than we are ourselves. Like begets like — un-
like begets unlike : steel and flint produce fire — they
are not like, but wheat brings wheat of its own kind,
and in its own likeness — so silver produces silver. It
is the restorative power of nature that thus counter-
acts the tendency to decay in all things terrestrial. I
bought the Hecke Thaler and the hazel wand from an
aged German in Lunenburg, whose father "* 'You
have been grossly deceived and shamefully treated,
my good friend,' I said. ' Is it possible that a man of
your good sense can believe in such a palpable ab-
surdity as the Hecke Thaler V
" He rose hastily, in great agitation, and held up
his hand, as if to waive the discussion, and said, ' I
know all you would say, Judge — I know all you tliink.
You imagine that my head is aft'ected, and regard me
either as a madman or a fool. It is natural, very
natural you should. T iiave not your knowledge.
Judge — I am not so learned nor so wise as you are ;
l)ut I crave your pardon, good sir — tliink me not pre-
sumptuous if I say there are some things I know
which you have not studied. The l)hnd hear more
accurately and have a keener sense of feeling, than
LIFE IN A COLONY. 253
those who have eyesight ; they have less to distract
their attention, and observe more accurately. I have
thought deeply on this subject, and must not lose my
faith because I cannot explain the mysteries of nature,
else am I an unbelieving heathen. I follow my des-
tiny, whatever is, is, and whatever is to be, will come
to pass — neither you nor I can alter the decrees of
Fate. Next week my term expires at Bridge Port.
Will you be so good as to allow this money to remain
in your safe till that time, when I will call and take
it on my way to Chester Bay, where it is my inten-
tion to prosecute my search until I obtain the object
of my wishes."*
" In a few days he returned, accompanied by Bar-
clay, who converted his money for him into the more
portable and convenient form of gold, and, thanking
me for what he called my great condescension and
kindness, bade me farewell.
" A month or two after this, I observed a notice in
one of the papers of the death of Mr. Welcome Shanks,
who lost his life by the collapse of a shaft in which
he was working on Tancook Island, in Chester Bay.
The object of the excavation, it went on to say, ap-
peared to be so perfectly unintelligible, that it was
generally supposed the unfortunate man must have
been of unsound mind.
254! THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
CHAPTER X.
THE LONE HOUSE.
This morning, I accompanied the Judge and Miss
Sandtbi'd in their sleigh on an excursion into the
country. Tlie scene, thougli rather painful to the
eyes, was indescribably brilliant and beautiful. There
liad been, during last night and part of yesterday, a
slight thaw, accompanied by a cold line rain that froze,
the moment it fell, into ice of the purest crystal.
Every deciduous tree was covered with this glittering
coatino-, and looked in the distance like an enormous
thou'rh o-raceful bunch of feathers ; while, on a nearer
approach, it resembled, with its limbs now bending
under the heavy weight of the transparent incrus-
tation, a dazzling chandelier. The open fields, covered
with a rouirh but hardened surface of snow, glistened
in the sun as if thickly strewed with the largest dia-
monds ; and every rail of the wooden fences in this
(reneral profusion of ornaments was decorated with a
delicate fringe of pendent ice, that radiated like bur-
nished silver. The heavy and sombre spruce, loaded
with snow, rejoiced in a green old ago. Having its
massy shape relieved by strong and numerous lights,
LIFE IN A COLONY. 255
it gained in grace what it lost in strength, and stood
erect among its drooping neighbours, venerable but
vigorous, the hoary forefather of the wood.
The tall and slender poplar and white birch, which
here and there had sprung up in the new clearings
from the roots of old trees, and outgrown their strength
and proportions, bent their heads gracefully to the
ground under their unusual burden, and formed fanciftil
arches, which the frost encircled with numerous wreaths
of pearls. Everything in the distance was covered
with the purest white, while the colours of nearer
objects were as diversified as their forms,
. The bark of the different trees and their limbs ap-
peared through the transparent ice ; and the rays of
the sun, as they fell upon them, invested them with
all the hues of the prism. It was a scene as impos-
sible to describe as to forget. To the natives, it is
not an unusual sight, for it generally occurs once a
year, at least, and its effects are as well appreciated as
its beauty. The farmer foresees and laments serious
injury to his orchard, the woodman a pitiless pelting
of ice as he plies his axe in the forest, the huntsman
a barrier to his sport, and the traveller an omen of
hard and severe weather ; and yet such was the glory
of the landscape, that every heart felt its magic, and
acknowledged the might and the beauty of this sudden
transformation. It was the work of a night. The
sun set with chilling showers. It rose in all its
splendour to witness and to heighten, by its presence,
25G THE OLD JlDfiE; OR,
the magnificence and brilliancy of the scene. We
constantly recurred to this topic after our return, and
again and again went to the window, as the day de-
clined, to catch the last parting glimpse of the "silver
frost" before it dissolved from view under the gaze of
the sun, and vanished for ever. In the evening,
winter and its scenery, its festivities and j)rivations,
and its effects on the habits, feelings, and tastes of tlie
people, formed the subject of a long conversation, in
which the Judge told me the followiuii sad and inter-
esting story : —
On one of the shore-roads, as the highways near the
Atlantic are called, in a distant part of the province,
there is a lone house, situated in the midst of one
of the wildest and most barren tracts of country in
these colonies ; on either side of it are enormous bogs,
stretching away in the distance for miles. IJehind it
is an undulating country of granite formation, covered
with enormous masses of detached rock. In front is
a lake, in a deep and sunken hollow, so still, so cheer-
less, and repulsive, that it looks like the pool of death.
Beyond this, a mountain wave of granite rises and
shuts out the sea, which is not far distant. The place
where the house stands is a small ridge of land in the
form of a wedge, which formerly bore beech and birch
trees ; and not only had a tolerable soil, but was
exempt from the incumbrance of loose stone. Beyond
this ridge, however, all is barren. The surface is
either naked rock or partially covered with moss, the
LIFE IN A COLONY. 257
wild strawberry, and the hardy white clover. Here
and there a stunted birch or dwarf larch finds a scanty
subsistence in the crevices of the rocks, or in coarse
o-ravel formed bv the disintefrration that time and the
alternations of heat and frost have produced in the
granite. In the hollows, which resemble basins or
stone reservoirs, a boggy substance has accumulated,
that nurtures small groves of ill-conditioned and half-
fed firs, which seem to have grown prematurely old,
and grey before their time, being covered with white
moss, which, climbing up their stems, hangs pendent
from their limbs, like hoary locks. The larger bogs
on the right and left are in part covered with a long,
coarse, aquatic grass (which the moose and carraboo
feed upon in winter, when the frost enables them to
travel over these treacherous and dangerous places),
and in part by the yellow water-lilies, the wild iris,
and clusters of cranberry -bushes.
It is impossible to conceive anything more lonely
and desolate than this place. Even in summer, when
the grassy road is well defined, and vegetation has
done its best to clothe the huge proportions of the
landscape and conceal its poverty and deformity, when
the glittering insects flutter by to withdraw your at-
tention from their dank, stagnant, and unwholesome
cradles, to their own beauty, and the wild bee, as he
journeys on, whispers of his winter''s store of honey,
and the birds sing merrily that contentment is bliss ;
even then, excited by the novelty of the scene, and
2.58 THE OLD JL'DGE; OR,
intfirosted, as you are, in the little, lone housoliold of
the desert, its total seclusion fnun the world, and the
whole human family, overpowers and appals you. A
crowd of ideas rushes into your mind faster than you can
arrange and dispose of them. Surely, you say, Here,
at least, is innocence ; and, where there is innocence,
there must be happiness. Where there is no tempter,
there can be no victim. It is the "still water" of
life. Here, all is calm and quiet, while, on cither side,
is the rapid or the cataract. The passions can have
no scope; the affections must occupy the whole ground.
How can envy, hatred, malice, or uncharitableness
find an entrance ? There can be nothing to envy
where the condition of all is alike, and where all that
is garnered is a common stock. There can be no
hatred, where there is no injury or no superiority; but
they can love one another, for they are all in all to
each other ; and they can trim their fire for the poor
wayfaring man, feed him, and send him on his journey
rejoicing. They can hear from him of the houseless
stranger, and bless God with thankful hearts that Ho
has given them a home to dwell in. He may tell them
talas of war, but they feel they are beyond its reach ;
and, what is far better, learn that, if poverty has its
privations, it has also its own peculiar privileges .and
innnunities. Thouo-hts like these naturallv force them-
selves upon you in such a scene. Your feelings are
subdued and softened. You behold the familv with
interest and affection, but still you shrink at a full
LIFE IN A COLONY. 259
view of their situation, and involuntarily regard it
with pity as a hopeless exile. You are a creature of
habit ; you cannot understand it ; you feel you have
social duties to perform ; that grief is lessened when
the burden is divided, and happiness increased when
it is imparted ; that man was not made to live alone ;
and that natural wants, individual weakness, and com-
mon protection require that, though we live in families,
our families nmst dwell in communities.
If such be the feelinffs that a traveller entertains,
even in summer, how must he shudder when he re-
gards this lone house in winter I I have seen many
solitary liabitations as well as this, and some of them
much farther removed from any neighbourhood, but
never one so dreary and so desolate. Follow any
new road into the wilderness, and you will find a
family settled there, miles and miles from any house.
But imagination soon fills up the intervening space
with a dense population, and you see them in the
midst of a well-cultivated country, and enjoying all
the blessings of a civilized community. They are
merely pioneers. They have taken up their station :
the tide of emigration will speedily reach them, and
pass on. Go into that house, and you are at once
struck with the difference of the two families. The
former is still life and contentment ; the latter is all
hope, bustle, and noisy happiness. The axe is at
work on the forest, that is ringing with its regular
blows. Merry voices are heard there, and the loud
2G0 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
laugh echoes through the woods, for friends liave come
from the settlements, and ten acres of wood are to be
cut down in one day. Sleighs are arriving with their
neighbours and relations, from whom they have lately
parted ; and at night there will be a festive assembly
at a place whicli, until the year before, when the road
was made and the house built, wa« in the heart of
a howling wilderness. There is nothiuir about such a
dwelling to make you think it desolate, although lone-
liness is its characteristic. Converse with the forester,
a fine, manly, native settler, and you find he has
visions of a mill on his brook ; he talks of keeping
fifty head of horned cattle in a few years. As soon
as his mill is finished, this log-hut is to be superseded
by a large framed house ; and that miserable shed,
as he calls his stable, is to give place to a spaci-
ous barn, seventy feet long and fifty feet wide. He
is full of merriment, confidence, and hope. In the
former place, a pious resignation, a placid content-
ment, hearts chastened and subdued into a patient
endurance of toil, and a meek but firm reliance on
the superintendence of a Divine Providence, form a
strong contast to the more animated and self-relying
forest family.
The wintry blast howls round their dwelling, like a
remorseless and savage foe. Its hollow, mournful
voice appals the heart with painful recollections of its
overpowering strength ; and the poor besieged family,
as they encircle their little fire at night (drawn still
LIFE IN A COLONY. 261
closer too-etlier now bv tlieir mutual fears and affec-
tions), offer up a silent prayer to the throne of grace,
and implore the continued and mercifiil protection of
Him who is always a father to the fatherless. At this
season the road is covered, in common with the dreary
desert, with deep snow. In the clear light of an un-
clouded sun, its direction may be ascertained by an
experienced traveller, and by him alone ; but, at night,
or in stormy weather, it is a vast and trackless field,
where the fatigued and bewildered stranger is doomed
to inevitable death.
To afford shelter and assistance to the traveller,
to furnish him with a guide, and speed him on his
way, was the object which John Lent had in
view in settling on the " Ridge.'" He was aided by
the subscriptions and encouraged by the personal as-
sistance of those on either side of the desert who
were interested in the road, or in the benevolence of
the undertakinsr. A house and barn were erected
with much labour and difficulty (for all the materials
were brought from a great distance), the Court of Ses-
sions granted him a free tavern license, and the legis-
lature of the province a small sum of ten or twelve
pounds a-year, in consideration of the importance of
this house to the mail communication to that part of
the province.
The Ridge contained about thirty acres of land.
These were soon cleared and brought into cultivation,
and produced his winter's store of hay, and yearly
262 TllK OLD JLDGE; OR,
supply of wheat and vegetables. His sheep and cows
wandered over the plains, and found in suunncr. in an
extended rang-c, sufficient food nn the scattered and
short, but sweet, herbage of white clover, and the
leaves of the dwarf bushes. The bog supplied him
with fuel and materials for cultivating his fields, while
the proceeds of his little inn enabled him to obtain some
of those articles of groceries that habit has rendered
indispensable to the poorest people in this country.
Such was the condition of this family. They de-
rived a scanty l)ut a certain provision from the sources
I have described. Year followed year with little
variation. Their occupations came and ceased with
the seasons. Time passed silently away, and, as there
were few incidents of importance that interested them,
its flight was unperceived and unmarked. The three
eldest dau'diters had severally left home for service
in the next town, which was a seaport ; had married
and quitted the country ; and the family, at the time
I am speaking of, consisted of John Lent, his wife,
and three little girls, the youngest of whom was seven
years of age. When I arrived at the house last
summer, Mrs. Lent did not at first recognise mo. Old
age had so completely covered my visage with Ins
wrinkled and repulsive mask, that the features of
manhood were effectually concealed from view. It had
removed my hair, deprived me of my teeth, obscured
my eyes, and disfigured my cheeks with unseemly
furrows.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 263
These rava^'es of time, however, are wisely per-
mitted or ordained, to prepare us to leave a world
which we can no longer either serve or adorn. In
proportion as we lose our personal attractions, man-
kind recede from us ; and, at last, we mutually take
leave of each other without a sio-h or a tear of regret.
What years had gradually effected for me, misfor-
tune had suddenly and deeply engraven upon her.
The young and cheerful woman whom I had known
was now a staid and care-worn matron ; the light and
elastic step of youth had been succeeded by the slow
and heavy tread of limbs stiffened with toil, and her
hair had blanched under grief and anxiety. My voice
first attracted her attention. She said she knew it,
and was certain it was that of an old and kind friend,
and entreated me not to think her ungrateful if she
could not recall my name, for her poor head had been
confused of late. On discovering who I was, she com-
municated to me a brief outline of her melancholy
story, the details of which I subsequently heard from
others at Shelburne.
During the previous winter, her husband had set
out on foot for the nearest town, to procure some little
necessaries for the house, and intended to return the
next day. The subsequent morning was fine, but the
weather, as is often the case in this variable climate,
suddenly changed. At noon it began to snow ; to-
wards evening the wind had risen to a gale, and clouds
of sleet were sweeping over the desert with resistless
264 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
fury. Once or twice she went to the door, and looked
out, but withdrew immediately, nearly blinded and
suffocated by the drifting storm. Her evening meal
was prepared for her husband. The table, with its
snow-white cover, stood ready for his reception. The
savoury stew simmered on the hearth, and the pota-
toes gave out their steam in token of readiness, while
the little eartheru teapot and unleavened cake, the
never-foiling appendages of a settler''s meal, were ready
to cheer him on his return. " Ah, here he is !" she
said, as the outer door suddenly opened, followed by
thick volumes of snow that nearlv filled the little
entry. " No, that is the wind that has forced it open.
He won't be here to-night ; we had better go to
supper. He saw the coming storm, and remained in
town. I often wonder how he can fortel the weather
so well. He knows when a thaw, or a frost, or a fall
of snow, or a tempest is approaching, hours before-
hand. He was too wise to try the barren to-day.""
His absence gave her no anxiety whatever; she
had become familiar with the storms, and dreaded them
only for others who were strangers and unwary. He
had often been away before, and there was nothing
unusual in his not arriving now. It was a proof of
his sairacitv, and not of his danirtT.
The gale continued unabated throughout the second
day, and she neither expected him nor prepared for
his reception. The third day was calm and tranquil ;
the whirlwind had spent its fury, and, having rolled
LIFE IN A COLONY. 265
up its wreatliy pillows, sunk down and reposed in
utter exhaustion. The snow-birds came in numbers
about the barn, to feed on the hayseed of the stack-
yard, and the cattle were set at liberty, to relax their
stiffened limbs, and to go to the spring in quest of
water. The affrighted and half-famished poultry issued
from their hiding-places, and clamorously demanded
that attention that had been so long withheld, while
the ill-omened crow came at the well-known signal,
to enforce his claim to a share of the food, as a house-
less and a friendless stranger. The children, too,
were released from their prison, and life and animation
were again to be seen round the Lone House.
As the mother stood at the door, and looked abroad
upon the scene, a little spring bird, the first harbinger
of that glad season, carolled merrily from the leafless
apple-tree at the side of the cottage.
" Thank €rod !" she said, " winter is now nearly
over, and its storms and trials ; we have seldom more
than one very heavy gale of wind after that little bird
comes to sing us a song of spring. Your father will
be at home early to-day." And she sent the eldest
girl to the snares set for catching wild rabbits. " They
will be all abroad to-day," she said ; " see if there are
any there for his dinner."
In a short time the child returned, with two of
these little animals in her hand, and the table was
again spread ; but he came not. He would return,
perhaps, she thought, in the evening ; for, when he
VOL. I. N
266 THE OLD JlDflE; OR,
did not arrive at noon, he seldom reached home until
sunset. But niijht came with its accustomed meal,
and his place was still vacant. To-morrow would be
post-day; he had very properly waited, she said, to
come with Ainslow. She was glad of it, for he was
lame, the walking was heavy, and he had a pack to
carry. Yes, they would both bo here early in the
day. Doubt, fear, or misgiving, never entered her
mind. She had great confidence in his judgment ;
whatever he decided on was right, and it was prudent
and much more agreeable for him to travel in company
with the postman, who had all the news, and was a
pleasant and obliijing man. The next dav brought
again and again merry faces to the door, to look over
the dreary bog, and catcli the first glimpse of the
sleigh.
At last, a shout proclaimed its approach, and the
whole group were assembled to see the little dark speck
tliat was moving forward in the distance, and gradually
enlarging into a distinct form. It was anxiously
watched, but was slow in coming, as every thing in
life is that is impatiently waited for.
The arrival of the postman was an important event
at this little habitation. He was a part of that world
on either side of them, of which tliey had heard and
formed vague conceptions, but which they had never
seen. Their father's return, too, was an aftair of great
interest. Ho <lid not very frequently leave home;
and, when he did, he alwavs brought back some little
LIFE IN A COLONY. 267
present to the mother or her children, from some kind
persons, whom their attentions and peculiar situation
and character had converted from strangers into friends.
They were little events, to be sure ; but these little
incidents constitute " the short and simple annals of
the poor." They are all that occur to diversify the
monotony of their secluded life. The postman came,
but he had no companion. He drove his sleigh to the
opposite side of the road, where the barn stood, and,
leaving it there, he proceeded to the house. He was
met by Mrs. Lent, who shook him cordially by the
hand, and said that she had expected her husband
with him, but supposed he was not ready to come.
The dinner, however, was now waiting, and she
pressed him to go in and partake with the family of
their humble meal.
" Have you seen John f
The truth had now to be told, which Ainslow did
in the kindest and most considerate manner. After
preparing her mind for the reception of very bad news,
he proceeded to inform her, that as he crossed the
wooden bridge, at the black brook in the bog, he ob-
served John Lent sitting on the floor, with his back
resting against the rail, a stifiened and frozen corpse.
He had evidently been overpowered by the storm,
which, comins: from the eastward, blew full in his
face, depriving him at once of his breath and his
streno-th : and, haviuo- sat down exhausted to rest
his wearied limbs, he had sunk into that fatal sleep in
N 2
268 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
which the soul, without a struggle or a sigh, passes
into another ami a bottir world. He added, that he
had taken him up in his arms, and lifted him into the
sleigh, where he now was ; and that he had covered
him with a rug, and driven to the barn, that she niiuht
not be too suddenly shocked by the awful sight of
the dead body; and concluded with those consolatory
remarks which, though unheard or unheeded, are
usually addressed to those who are smitten down by
sudden affliction.
Before ho had finished his narrative, a loud, hncr-
continued, and piercing cry of distress arose from the
sleigh that thrilled the whole group, and brought them
instantly to the door. The poor man's fiiithful and
affectionate dog had discovered his master, and the
strong instinct of the animal revealed to him at once
that ho would never more hear that voice of kindness
and fellowship that had cheered him from day to day,
or receive his food from that hand which had always
been extended to feed or to fondle him. The postman
then drove the sleigh to the door, lifted out the life-
less body, which had been frozen in its sittino- atti-
tude, and, placing it in the .same position on a large
chest, in a corner of the strangers' room, rested its
back against the wall. It looked like a man not dead,
bnt sleeping. He then withdrew the family into their
sitting-room, and, having placed some oats in a bucket
before his horse, who ate them as he stood in his har-
ness, ho occupied the few remaining minutes of his
LIFE IN A COLONY. 269
time in endeavouring, as he best could, to condole with
and comfort the poor widow and her helpless family.
He was astonished at her fortitude. Her agony, it
was evident, was almost insupportable, but she gave no
vent to violent and unavailing lamentations. He was
not the first, as he will be by no means the last, to ad-
mire this quality of the female mind when roused by
great events to deep thought and cool and deliberate
action. Weak, timid, and powerless as woman is, in
the minor troubles and trials of life, when real danger
and great affliclions are to be encountered, she rises
superior to fear, calls in the aid of a judgment always
good, when confidently relied on, and a moral courage
surpassing that of man, because its foundations are not
built on the delusive laws of honour, but deeply laid
in conscious innocence, in a strong sense of the obliga-
tions of duty, and a pious and firm reliance on the
might and goodness of God. Thus supported and
strengthened, she sustains burdens disproportioned
to her sex, and successfiilly resists afflictions that over-
power the vigour and appal the courage of man.
The poor widow heard him calmly and patiently,
thouo-h words seemed to fail her when thanking him
for his kindness. This portentous silence, however,
deceived him. There are calamities too heavy to be
borne, and misfortunes may overpower by surprise,
that could be successfully resisted if their advent were
known. Although the blow did not prostrate this
miserable woman, it stunned her into insensibility.
•270 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
Thought Jiiul memory seemed suspended. Tncaj)able
of action herself, she was passive in the hands of her
chihh-en. Slie had but one confused and indistinct
idea that remained. She tliought her husband was at
home, and asleep in the adjoining room, but his long
slumber and unbroken silence did not alarm her.
When her meals were prepared by her daughter, she
would look round and say, " Call your flither — tell
him we wait for him ;" or, at night, she would look
into his room and admonish him it was prudent to
wake up and go to bed, or he would take cold. The
poor children gazed at her, wondered, and shed tears.
Helpless, unprotected, and alone in the world, their
little hearts failed them ; and the inquiry often and
often occurred to their minds, What is to become of
us ? Death, that sat embodied in one human form in
that house, and had laid his cold, benumbing hand on
another, whom he apjicared to have marked for his
victim, seemed rcadv to devour them all. Silence first
disclosed to them their solitude, and solitude their
dano-er. On the third evening, they clustered as usual
round their mother's chair and prayed ; but she was
unable to join them. She looked at them, but did not
seem to comprehend them. They then tried, with
faltering lips and tearful eyes, a verse of a hynm, one
that she had always been fond of; but two voices were
now wanting, and they were alarmed at the feeble and
])laintive sound of their own. The chords of the
widow's heart vibrated at the sound of the nmsic, and
LIFE IN A COLONY. 271
she looked about her as one awaking from slumber.
Thought, feeling, and sensibility returned ; the foun-
tains of her affections opened, and a flood of tears
mingled with those of her children. She inquired of
them the day of the week, and whether any person
had been at the house since the postman left it, wrung
her hands in agony at the thoughts of the length of
her stupor, and, having affectionately kissed and
blessed her little ones, went to bed to weep unseen, and
pour out her griefs and petitions undisturbed to Him
who has graciously promised His protection to the
widow and the orphan.
In the morning, she rose more composed but sadly
changed. Years had revolved in that night, and left
their tracks and furrows on her faded cheek ; and the
depth, and strength, and acuteness of her mental
sufferiuo-s had rendered her hair as white as the snow-
wreath that death had folded round her husband as a
winding-sheet. The struggle had been violent, but
successful. She was afflicted, but not subdued — bereft,
but not destitute. She was sensible of her situation,
and wilHnij to submit with humble resis-nation ; aware
of her duties, and ready to undertake them. She stood
between the living and the dead. A fearful debt was
to be discharged to the one, subsistence and comfort
were due to the other. She commenced the morning
with prayer from a church formulary that had been
given her by a travelling missionary, and then went
about her usual duties. As she sat by her fireside in
272 THEOLDJUDGK; OR,
the cveuing, she revolved iii her iniud the new sphere
in which she was placed. As any doubt or difficulty
suggested itself, her loss became more and more ap-
parent. How was her husband to be buried ! The
ground was frozen to the depth of three feet, and she
was unable to dig a grave. She dare not go to the
next neighbour*'s, a distance of seven miles, for she
could not leave her children. She could not send her
eldest daughter, for she did not know the way ; and
she, too, might be lost. She must wait for the post-
man ; he would arrive in three days, and would assist
her. If not, God would send relief when least ex-
pected. Everything, however, about her, everything
she had to do, and everything she required, mixed it-
self in some way with recollections of him she mourned,
and reminded her of some habit, word, or act of his.
Even the weather now made her shudder. The storm,
like a giant refreshed with sleep, arose again in all its
might, and swept across the desert with such unbroken
force that the snow appeared rather like a movuig mass
of drift than distinct and separate flakes. It was just
such an evening as when her husband perished.
She shuddered, and drew her children nearer to her
on the hearth. They had always loved each other,
but their affection was greatly increased now, for they
knew that death was a reality. Tliej- had seen it, and
felt its effects. It had lessened their number once —
it could do so again. They had been told they were
mortal, now they knew it. It was an awful disclosure
LIFE IN A COLONY. 273
to them, and yet what was death 1 It was not annihila-
tion, for the body remained. That which had in-
habited and animated it was incorporeal, and had de-
parted unseen. It was that unknown, invisible, and
mysterious spirit, they had unconsciously loved, for
the corpse shocked and terrified them. They had been
instructed that there was a soul that survived the
body, but they could not comprehend it. They now
saw and shuddered at the difference between the living
and the dead. It was palpable, but still it was not
intelligible. Poor little innocents! it was their first
practical lesson in mortality, and it was engraved on
their aching hearts too deeply ever to be forgotten.
Their affection now became more intense and far
more tender, for solicitude had blended with it and
softened it. Yes, their little circle was stronger for
having its circumference reduced ; it could bear more
pressure than before, if the burden were unhappily
increased.
The time for rest had now approached, and the widow
was weak and unwell. The thought of her unburied
husband oppressed her. The presence of death, too,
in the house, for so long a time, was a heavy load for
her nerves ; and, unable to sustain her feelings and her
reflections any longer, she resorted to her evening
prayers with her little family, and added to the pre-
scribed form a short and simple petition of her own.
Her voice was almost inaudible, amid the din and roar
of the tempest, to those around her ; but it penetrated
N 5
274 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
far above the elements, and reached the throne of mercy
to wliicli it was addressed.
llclieved, refreshed, and strengthened hy this devo-
tional exercise, they gathered again around the hearth
ere the fire was secured for the night, and were engaged
in some little consultation about the daily duties that
were to be assigned to each, when they were aroused
by a loud and violent knocking at the door. The
mother arose and opened it witii a palpitating heart.
Three strange, wild-looking, haggard men, entreated
admittance for God's sake, for they were famished, and
nearly chilled to death with the cold. What a con-
trast for that hitherto quiet and noiseless household!
There were these men stamping on the floor, shaking
ofi" the snow from their clothes, beatinj; their hands
together, throwing down their packs, talking loudly,
and all speaking at once — all calling for food, all de-
manding more fire, and all rejoicing in their shelter
and safety. The children huddled tojiether in affi'iirht,
in the corner of the room, and the poor mother trimmed
her lamp, rebuilt her fire, and trembled as she reflected
that she was alone and unprotected. Who are these
men ? she asked herself Houseless in the storm, her
heart replied, " Would to Heaven there had been such
a shelter for my poor John Lent ! We need not fear,
for God and our poverty are our protection."' Slie
told them they were in the house of death — that her
liusbaud lay dead, and, for want of assistance, unburied
in the next room ; but that all that could be done for
LIFE IN A COLONY. 275
them she would do, though at such a time, and in sucli
a place, that all, of course, would be but very little.
She advised them to keep at a distance from the fire ;
and, having ascertained that they were not frost-bitten,
set about getting them some refreshment.
While at work, she heard all that they had to say
to each other ; and, with the quickness of observation
peculiar to the natives of this country, soon perceived
they were not equals — that one of them spoke with a
voice of authority ; that another called him, Sir ; and
the third only answered when he was spoken to, and
that all three were sailors. They had a fearful tale
of trouble and of death, to which frequent allusion was
made. They were the captain, mate, and steward of
a ship that had been wrecked that day on the coast
beyond the hilly land in front of the cottage, and
were the sole survivors of ten, who, on that morning,
were pursuing their course on the ocean in perfect con-
fidence and safety. A hearty meal was hastily pre-
pared, and more hastily despatched. Liquor Avas
then asked for ; she trembled and obeyed. She was a
lone woman, it was a dangerous thing, and she hesi-
tated ; but a moment's reflection suggested to her that
it was impossible that they could either forget her loss
or their own.
A fresh difficulty now occurred, to understand whicli
it is necessary to describe the house. The chimney
stood in the middle of the building, opposite the front
door, which opened into a small entry. On the riglit,
'276 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
was the family sitting-room, or kitchen, where they
were now assembk>d, adjoinini; which wore two bed-
rooms. On tlie left, three rooms were similarly ar-
ranoed, and devoted to the accommodation of strangers.
In the apartment corresponding to the one they were
in, was the frozen body of her husband, resting on
a chest, in a sitting attitude, as I have before de-
scribed. In order to prepare their beds, it was neces-
sary to pass through that room, into which she had not
ventured since she had recovered from her stupor.
She was perplexed and distressed, but, at last, having
stated to the captain her diflBculty, he at once ordered
the steward to go and make the requisite arrangements.
The master and mate having been thus provided for
the night, some blankets were given to the steward,
who slept on the hearth, before the kitchen fire.
In the morning, the latter was sent to dig a grave
i'or poor John Lent, while the other two, having pro-
cured the requisite tools, made him a coffin, into which
he was placed with great difficulty, from the rigidity
of his limbs. The little pony was then harnessed to
the sledge, and the body was followed by the family
and their guests to its last resting-place. The beau-
tiful burial service of the church was read over the de-
ceased by the captain, amid the heartfelt sobs of the
widow, the loud lamentations of the children, and the
generous tears of the sailors. Tiie scene was one that
was deeply felt by all present. There was a commu-
nity of suffering, a similarity of situation, and a sym-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 277
pathy among them all, that for the time made them
forget they were strangers, and feel towards each
other like members of one family. The mariners had
twice narrowly escaped death themselves : first, from
shipwreck, and then from the intensity of the weather;
while seven of their comrades had been swept into
eternity before their eyes. The poor widow, in losing
John Lent, appeared to have lost every thing — her
friend, her support, her companion, and protector ; the
husband of her heart, the father of her children. She
had afforded them food, shelter, and a home. They
had aided her in a most trying moment with their
personal assistance, and comforted her with their sym-
pathy and kindness.
The next morning, her guests visited the seashore,
in order to ascertain whether any portion of the cargo
of their vessel could be saved. When they arrived at
the scene of their disaster, they found that the vessel
was gone ; she had either fallen off from the precipi-
tous cliff upon which she had been thrown by the vio-
lence of the sea, or been withdrawn by the reflux of
the mountain waves, and had sunk into the deep
water, where her masts could just now be discerned
under its clear and untroubled surface. The cabin,
which had been built upon the deck, had been broken
to pieces, and fragments of it were to be seen scattered
about on the snow. Some few barrels and boxes from
the steward''s pantry had been thrown on shore, con-
taining stores of various kinds, and also the captain's
278 THE OLD JUDGE J OR,
hammock and bedclini^. These were divided into two
small lots, of equal weight, and constituted two sleigh
loads, for the travelling was too heavy to permit them
all to be carried at once. The captain j)rcsented them,
together with a purse of ten sovereigns, to the poor
widow, as a token of his gratitude for lior kindness
and sympathy for his distress. She was also recom-
mended to examine the shore from time to time, after
violent gales of winds, as many loose articles would no
doubt hereafter float to the surfiice ; and these, by a
written authority, he empowered her to apply to her
own use.
On the succeeding morning, the postman returned
with his iiuiil, and furnished a conveyance for the
steward. The captain and mate followed, under his
guidance, with Mrs. Lent\s little pony and sledge.
They now took an affectionate leave of each other, with
mutual thanks and benedictions, and the widow and her
family were again left to their sorrows and their
labours. From that day she said an unseen hand had
uplield her, fed her, and protected her, and that hand
was the hand of the good and merciful God of tbe
widow and the orphan. There were times, she added,
when the wounds of her heart would burst open and
bleed afresh ; but she Iiad been told the affections re-
quired that relief, and tliat Nature had wisely pro-
vided it, to prevent a worse issue. She informed me
that she often saw her Imsband of late. When sitting
by her solitary lamj), after her children had fallen
LIFE IN A COLONY. 279
asleep, slie frequently perceived him looking in at the
window upon her. She would sometimes rise and go
there, with a view of conversing with him, but he
always withdrew, as if he was not permitted to have
an interview with her. She said she was not afraid
to meet him ; whytshould she be ? He who had loved
her in life would not harm her in death. As soon as
she returned to her seat, he would again resume his
place at the window, and watch over her for hours to-
gether. She had mentioned the circumstance to the
clergyman, who charged her to keep her secret, and
especially from her children, whose young and weak
nerves it might terrify. He had endeavoured to per-
suade her it was the reflexion of her own face in the
glass ; that it was a natural effect, and by no means
an unusual occurrence. But no one, she added, knew
so well as those who saw with their own eyes. It was
difficult, perhaps, for others, who had not been so
favoured and protected, to believe it, but it was, never-
theless, strictly true ; and was a great comfort to her
to think that his care and his love existed for her be-
yond the grave.
She said many people had advised her to leave that
place, as too insecure and inconvenient for a helpless
woman ; but God had never failed them. She had
never known want, or been visited by illness, while
she and her children had been fed in the wilderness,
like the chosen people of the Lord. He had raised
her up a host of friends, whose heart He had touclied
280 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
witli kindness for her, and whose hands He liad used
as the instruments of His mercy and bounty. It
would bo ungrateful and distrustful in her to leave a
place He liad selected for her, and He might perhaps
turn away his countenance in anger, and abandon her
in her old age to poverty and wanti* And, besides, she
said, there is my old man ; his visits now are dearer
to me than ever; he was once my companion — he is
now my guardian angel. I cannot and I will not for-
sake him while I live ; and when it is God's will that
I depart hence, I hope to be laid beside him, who,
alive or dead, has never suffered this poor dwelling to
bo to me a " Lone House."
LIFE IN A COLONY. 281
CHAPTER XL
THE KEEPING-ROOM OF AN INN;
OR, JUDGE BELER's GHOST.
NO. I.
The more I see of Nova Scotia, the more I appre-
ciate the soundness of the counsel given me by my
friend Barclay, who recommended me, instead of com-
mencing a continuous tour of the provinces, to select
some one colony, live in it for the space of a year at
least, and study the people, their habits and institu-
tions, and then resume my travels. " The store of
knowledge thus acquired," he said, " would enable me
to comprehend many things afterwards which would
otherwise appear unintelligible." I am now daily reap-
ing the advantage of this judicious advice. Neither
the Americans nor the provincials, who differ from
each other nearly as much as from the English, are
so easily understood as the vanity of a traveller would
lead him to suppose. To be known, they must be
studied ; and to study them properly requires time
and the aid of resident friends. We have lately been
spending a fortnight at Halifax, amid the festivities
and gaieties of that hospitable town.
282 THK OLD JUDGE ; OR,
Tlic hi.st tluvc days previous to our departure were
marked by intense cold. The harbour smoked like
a basin of boilinn; water (the steam of which is not
inaptly called the Barber), and then froze into a mass
of ice of great depth and solidity. The streets were
almost deserted, and the few persons who were to be
seen upon them hurried to and fro, as if unable to
withstand the severity of the cold. The snow sounded
hard and crisp under their feet, and the nails of the
wooden houses, vieldinjj to the sudden contraction
occasioned by the frost, separated with a noise not
unlike the report of pistols. Small and almost im-
palpable crystalline particles of snow floated in the
air like down. The western sky assumed a light,
reddish colour, resembling that of a summer'^s sunset ;
and the Dartmouth hills, on the opposite side of the
harbour, and all distant objects, appeared, not only
more distinctly visible, but very nmch nearer than
usual. Sounds underwent a similar change, and bo-
came more audible and more distinguishable. The
lieated air of our room, when it came in contact with
the glass of the window, froze into beautiful, trans-
parent, silvery coatings, exhibiting, in the delicate
texture of their brilliant tracerv, every imajrinable
form of landscape, figures, trees, and variegated pat-
terns, like exquisite embroidery. The beauty of this
partial encrustation of the glass no language can
describe, and I confess to having spent much time in
the childish amusement of studying and admiring the
LIFE IN A COLONY. 283
infinite variety of shapes it presented. Our dinner,
though colder than was agreeable, smoked as if it
were still undergoing the process of cooking. The
strong, clear, blazing fire appeared to give out no heat,
and our visible breaths painfully reminded us that
the frost had penetrated everywhere but into our lungs.
The following day, the weather suddenly relaxed
(for it is said that extreme heat or cold seldom con-
tinues in this country beyond seventy hours). Its
last efibrt and whole strength were expended, during
the night, in a white frost, which, under the rays of a
clear and unclouded sun, illumined and beautified
every object covered with its white and brilliant
mantle. By ten o'clock, the magical transparencies
had disappeared from the windows. Large, clear
drops of water trickled from the roof, and, as if unwill-
ing to quit a bed on which they had so long reposed,
clung with tenacity to the eaves, and congealed again
in the form of long and pendent icicles. About noon
a shower of tears preceded their inevitable fall, and
gave warning of an approaching thaw. The wind,
which had blown steadily, but very moderately, from
the north-west for several days, gradually diminished
until it ceased altogether. A few long-drawn sighs
and audible breathings indicated the waking up and
subsequent approach of a southerly gale. Meanwhile,
the soft and balmy air, and the delicious weather that
generally intervenes between the departure and arrival
of these two contending winds, had tempted the whole
2«4 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
population of the city to be abroad. The Tandem
Club and the four-in-hands of the garrison were out ;
and the double and single sleighs of the townsmen,
enveloped, as well as their inmates, with furs, and their
horses, decorated with bells fancifully arranged, and
many-coloured rosettes, enlivened the streets ; while
gaily-dressed people on foot and numerous equestrians
added to the animated and varieo-ated scene which
they themselves had come to admire.
Barclay, who had been only waiting for a change of
temperature, now drove up to the door in his tandem,
to take me back to Tllinoo. His sleiirh was a liirht but
compact vehicle, containing accommodation in front
for two persons, and a seat behind for a servant. It
was the best-appointed and most comfortable one I
had seen in the colony, and his horses were noted
for their beauty, speed, and docility. In a few
minutes, we were on our way to the country.
" I am in great doubt," he said, " how to drive.
I should like to proceed slowly, in order to enjoy the
charming weather ; but I fear we shall have a heavy
fall of snow, and that at no great distance. Observe
the singular aspect of the sky. It looks clear, but it
is not transparent. Although there is a strong light
and a total absence of clouds, the sun is, nevertheless,
obscured. Those Ions:, dark, heavv masses assembling
in the cast, and abiding their time for mischief, are
charged with snow ; and the heavens have a yellow,
and, what we call in this country, a creamy appear-
LIFE IN A COLONY. 285
ance : all which signs, when they follow intense cold,
such as we have experienced these last three days, and
a heavy, white frost, like that of the past night, are
certain indications of a storm. It is bad philosophy,
however, to allow anticipations of the future to mar
the enjoyment of the present. We must govern our-
selves according to circumstances. Let us proceed
leisurely at first ; and, if a gale overtake us, my horses
have both bottom and speed to keep pace with it."
There is something very novel and amusing in the
scene presented by a main road in winter, in the pro-
vinces, when traversed by the extraordinary looking
vehicles of the country. Here you encounter a load
of hay, of such huge proportions as to occupy, not
only the whole track, but nearly the whole highway,
drawn by a long, extended line of five or six horses.
Nothing can exceed the difficulty and inconvenience
of passing one of these moving stacks of hay (for such
they appear), an operation always performed at the
risk of upsetting, and often occasioning serious injury
to the horses and sleighs of the less favoured travellers.
In any other part of the world, this is an evil that
would soon be remedied, but those who own or drive
these teams are the multitude, and the gentlemen
whose lives and property are perilled are but few in
number ; aud, according to every rule of responsible
government, it is held to be reasonable that the few
should give way to the many. Then you meet ano-
ther and still more powerful team, drawing the wooden
286 THE OLD JUDGE J OR,
frame of a house, or an enormous spar, of dimensions
suitable for the mast of a seventy-four gun ship, either
end of wliieli is suppf)rto(l by a short, massive sled.
As soon as you have escaped these dangerous neigh-
bours, your nerves are again tested by a prodigious
load of wood, extending eight or ten feet in length,
and at least six or seven feet in heiirht, bound toijether
by four small stakes, the ends of which are secured in
the runners, and the tops insufficiently and carelessly
bound by a rope or chain. Seated on this travelling
wood-pile is the driver, M'ho, l)v the aid of a lon^
whip and the intonations of his voice, without any
rein whatever, directs half-a-dozen horses, if not ac-
cording to your ideas of safety, to his own entire
satisfaction.
Having escaped these perils, you have leisure to be
amused at a countryman sitting astride on the back of
an enormous pig, tlie uppermost one of some twenty
or thirty frozen carcases of pork which he is carrvinn-
to market ; who is followed by a man with a load of
empty barrels, piled as high in the air as the tops of
the trees, and destined for the fisheries. Behind these
are numberless sleds, having bodies like large packing-
boxes filled with mutton, poultry, butter, cheese, and
other rural productions. Such are the objects you
meet in your progress to the country : those that you
overtake and pass are loaded with every conceivable
vanety of supplies for themselves or retail traders.
For some distance from Halifax you encounter but
LIFE IN A COLONY. 287
few foot passengers, and they are so poorly clad,
and carry such heavy burdens, that you are struck
with compassion ; which you have scarcely time to
entertain or express before your ear is assailed with
the loud laugh or cheerful song of the merry, thought-
less Neoro. He has secured his food for the dav, and
doubts not that Providence will provide for him on
the morrow, and, therefore, like a true philosopher,
never suffers doubt or anxiety to trouble his mind.
While noticing and remarking on these objects, we
glided on with inconceivable ease. The snow had
slightly melted, and settled into a more compact form ;
there was neither friction nor resistance, and the
runners passed over it as lightly as an oiled substance.
Meanwhile, the colour of the road became altered.
The pure and unsullied white covering looked yellow
and dirtv — the usual forerunner of a chancre of weather.
A south wind, which had hitherto blown at intervals
in fitful ffusts, and moaned heavilv throuo;h the streets,
now arose into a steady gale, and the leafless branches
of the forest creaked and laboured under its influence.
A few loose, detached, and damp flakes of sleet, of
uncommon size, began to fall around us, Avliile the
hasty return of all the sleighs that had preceded us
bespoke the apprehension of their drivers.
We immediately increased our speed, but the falling
of the snow increased faster, and soon assumed, in
its rapid and compact descent, the appearance of a
dense cloud. The clear and cheerful sound of the
288 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
bflls becaiiio dull aiul heavy, and finally ceased alto-
gether, and our sleigh and ourselves were soon covered
with a heavy, adhesive white coating. As we pene-
trated further into the country, we found that the road,
according to the prediction of Barclay, presented a
less hardened surface, and that the travelling was both
deeper and more laborious.
" Now, my friend," he said, " while I occupy my-
self with driving, endeavour, as well as you can,
to guard us on the right, wiiile my servant keeps a
vigilant watch on the left hand ; for I intend to put
my horses to their utmost speed, and am afraid of
running into some of the country teams. The flakes
are getting smaller, finer, and drier ; the wind has
risen higher, and shifted to the east ; and wo are
going to have a gale of unusual violence."'"'
The storm, fortunately, was in our backs ; but the
rapidity of our motion through the white and dazzling
snow nearly deprived us of the power of vision. A
sudden turn of the road, which momentarily exposed
us to the full sweep of the blast, showed me the accu-
racy of my friend's predictions, for we plunged directly
through an enormous drift that lav extended across
our track like a wave of the sea, particles of which,
lifted by the wind, nearly suffocated us and our horses.
As soon as we resumed a western course, our route
lay for several miles through a wood, and, availing our-
selves of its protection, we pressed forward as fast as
possible. "God iiulj) those," he said, "who are
LIFE IN A COLOxNY. 289
travelling the other way, and have to face this storm,
with poor or jaded cattle ! as for ourselves, we are all
right, and shall soon reach Mount Hope. Our only
difficulty will be in the last mile of the road, which
we shall find, I fear, covered to the top of the fences.
Anything that horses can do, mine can effect ; but I
am afraid that, in their struggles, they will draw off
the shafts or the Whipple tree. This is decidedly
the worst tempest I have known for twenty years."
When we arrived at this critical part of our journey,
he requested me to take my seat in the back part of
the sleigh, in the lap of the servant, so as to lighten
the front of the vehicle when it pitched into the drifts,
and then, standing up himself, he slackened his pace
and drove cautiously. At times, our noble animals
appeared perfectly buried in snow, and could only pro-
ceed by rearing and plunging forward, and we were
often compelled to stop and lift up the sleigh, or lighten
its weio;ht, and disentano-le the traces from the legs of
the horses. The last drift terminated like a wall.
The wind passing between the house and the outbuild-
ings, which were situated on opposite sides of the
highway at Mount Hope, swept all that part of the
road perfectly bare, and rolled up the snow on one
side into a precipitous bank. Here Barclay got out,
and, examining the depth, pronounced it impossible
for horses to pass it in harness. Having released
them from the vehicle, and procured assistance from
the inn, we manaoed, thouo:h not without much diffi-
VOL. I. o
290 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
oulty, to remove the fence, and, by a circuitous route,
to conduct them in safety to the stables.
Wlieu Avc arrived at the house, we were at first
shown into a room warmed by a stove ; and shortly
afterwards into another, having one of the large, bla-
zing, glorious, wood fires of Nova Scotia. There is a
hospitable profusion about these rural fireplaces, and
a hearty welcome in their appearance, that contrasts
most favourably with the ingenious city contrivances
to administer the exact amount of heat with the least
possible expenditure of fuel. After a capital tlinner,
for the larders of the inns at this season of the year
are always abundantly supplied, we drew up to the
cheerful fire, and admired the two brass giants, Gog
and Magog, (the andirons) who supported with ease
the enormous weio;ht of wood.
The gale we had encountered, which still raged
wildly and furiously, led the conversation to incidents
resulting from similar events. Jiarclay related to me
the particulars of the great storm of 1798, when it is
said the greatest quantity of snow fell that was ever
known at any one time, and also mentioned a curious
occurrence that happened under his own view.
A few years ago, he said, when on his way to Cum-
berland (N.S.) in the spring of the year, he spent a
night on the (Jobe(juid iMuuntains. For several days
previous the weather had been uncommonly fine, and
numerous flocks of wild geese were seen pursuing their
annual miii;ration to the north. The morninij after his
LIFE IN A COLONY. 291
arrival, an enormous flock of these birds, meeting with
a storm of hail and freezing sleet, were observed re-
turning on their track in the form of the letter A, a
figure which they adopt to enable the stronger and
hardier ones to lead the advance. Their sagacity is so
great, that they are usually aware of the approach of
a tempest, and avoid its effects by seeking out a place
of shelter in due time. On this occasion, however, they
appear to have been unexpectedly overtaken ; and, as
the sleet froze on them as soon as it fell, they became
so overloaded and exhausted, that they descended into
a field immediately in front of the house, where the
whole of them were instantly taken prisoners, without
being able even to make an attempt to escape. Some
were eaten fresh by the family, others were preserved in
pickle, and the rest sent to the Halifax market, where,
he said, they put their feet to the fire before they went
to bed, and gave them a glass of hot whisk — whisk —
whiskey and water. The odd termination of the sen-
tence induced me to look up at the face of my friend,
and, lo ! he was fast asleep. The drowsy effects of the
large wood fire had mingled his thoughts or his wants
with his story of the birds.
For some time after we reached the house, there
were several arrivals from the country, among which
was the stage-sleigh from Illinoo, which had been up-
set more than once, and the top broken to pieces. All
the passengers spoke of the latter part of their journey
as one of greater difficulty and more danger than any
o 2
2U2 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
the}- liad ever cxporienceJ. On the following inoniiiig
we found, to our dismay, that it was not only snowing
and drifting as fast as ever, but that there was not the
slightest appearance of a change.
" We mu.st make up our minds," said Barclay, "to
reinaiu here for a day or two. It is impossihle for us
to leave this place in the present state of the roads,
and equally impossible for any others to arrive. I will
go and see who is in ' the keeping-room,"* and what
amusement it can afford us ; for it would be quite ab-
surd for a traveller like you to be shut up all day at an
inn with such an old cynic as me, while there may be
many persons here well worth studying and knowing."
The house at Mount Hope was inconveniently
situated, being on the top of rather a high hill, but was
verv well arranijed for the accommodation of the ditie-
rent classes of persons that frequented it. It was a
long, narrow, two-story building, forming two sides of
a square, and having a double entrance, one at the side
and one at the front. Besides the apartments appro-
priated to the use of those who preferred to be alone,
there were two large rooms, one of which was devoted
to teamsters, pedestrians, and people of that descrip-
tion, connected with which was the bar. The other
was called the keeping-room, and generally reserved
for the use of the family, but where old patrons, friends,
and actpiaintances, were not considered as intruders.
In tlie rear, and attached to this, was the kitchen,
larder, pantry, &c.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 293
Barclay soon returned, accompanied by Miss Lucy
Neal, the manager of the household, a fine, hearty,
blooming, good-natured country girl, of about thirty
years of age, to whom he introduced me. After chat.
Aing awhile about the storm, and other indifferent
matters, she said she feared I must find it dull to be
confined so long to the house ; and added, that if I
felt inclined, she would be glad to see me after dinner
in the keeping-room — an invitation which I most rea-
dily and cheerfully accepted.
As soon as she retired, Barclay said —
'■' I have arranged it all for you. I have ordered
dinner at two o'clock, so as to enable us to spend thn
whole afternoon below, where you will see one of the
oddest fellows in this country, Stephen Richardson, of
Clements, in the County of Annapolis. There is some
drollery about him, inexhaustible good humour, and,
amid all the nonsense he talks, more quickness of per-
ception and shrewdness than you would at first give
him credit for. Take him altogether, he is what may
be called a regular character. If I can manage it, I
will set him and others telling stories ; for nothing
illustrates the habits, manners, and tastes of a popula-
tion more than their favourite topics."
About four o'clock we joined the party of travellers
assembled in the privileged room of the family. This
apartment was about twenty-five feet in length, but
disproportionably narrow. The floor was painted, and
not carpeted, and the walls covered with a yellow
2y:t
THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
wash. Tlu" fireplace, which was of huge dimensions,
was tarnished with a back-log that required the efforts
of two men to roll it into its bed; and surmounted by
a mantelpiece that was graced with one of Mr. Samuel
Slick's clocks, the upper half being covered by a dial-
plate, and the lower portion exhibiting a portrait of
General AVashington mounted on a white charo-er
with long tail and flowing mane. The sides of the
room were ornamented with a sampler worked on
canvass, and some coarse gaudy-coloured prints, among
which the most conspicuous were two representing
George III. and Queen Charlotte, wearing their cro^vns,
and severally holding in one hand a globe and in the
other a sceptre, as if pla^nng a game of coronella. In
one corner was an open cupboard, fitting into the angle,
and exhibiting the best china and glass of the house.
In front of each window, was a stand supporting some
geraniums, monthly roses, and ivy.
The company consisted of about six or eight persons,
besides Miss Lucy and her sister. Mr. Stephen Rich-
ardson, to whom my attention had been previously
directed, was a tall, muscular, awkward-look inc man.
with a slight stoop in the shoulder. His manners were
free and easy, the expression of his face knowing and
comical, and his dress the light blue homespun common
to the country.
When we entered, a small, thin man, with a sour,
bilious face, and dressed in a suit of black cloth, was
entertaining the party with a grievance, for which ho
LIFE IN A COLONY. 295
expressed his determination to be avenged upon the
government at the next election. He had been at
Halifax, it seemed, from whence he was just returning,
to solicit some little petty local office at Aylsford,
where he resided, to which he thought himself emi-
nently entitled by his valuable political partisan ser-
vices, but which, to his dismay, he found had been
disposed of to an earlier and more fortunate appli-
cant. Loud and long were his denunciations and com-
plaints.
" I don''t pity you a morsel," said Stephen. " The
best office for a farmer is being his own overseer, and
the best fees those paid by his orchards and fields.
There is nothing so mean in folks like you and me as
office seekino;, unless it is in wearins; broadcloth instead
of homespun, as if a man was above his business.
Now, look at me," and he rose up and stood erect ; " I
am six feet four in my stockings, when unravelled and
bolt upright, and six feet five when stretched out on a
bench ; and, from the sole of my foot to the crown of
my head, I am dressed in the produce of my own
farm. I raised the flax and hackled it, and bred the
sheep and sheared the wool that made the linen and
the cloth I wear. I am sort of proud of it, too ; for
a farmer, according to my ideas of things, ought to be
known by his dress, like an officer or a parson ; and
then, when folks see him, they'll know he ain't run up
a bill at a shop, and ain't cutting a dash in things he
han't paid for.
'29G Tin: OLD JUDGE; OR,
" Fve known some very mean men in my time.
Tlierc was Deacon Overreach, now, he was so mean,
he always carried a hen in his gig-box when he tra-
velled, to pick up the oats his horse wasted in the
manger, and lay an egg for his breakfast in the morn-
ing. And then there was Hugo Himmelman, who
made his wife dig potatoes to pay for the marriage
license. Lawyer," he continued, addressing himself
to Barclay, " 1 must tell you that story of Hugo, for
it!'s not a bad one ; and good stories, like potatoes,
ain''t as plenty as they used to be when I was a boy.
Hugo is a neighbour of mine, though considerably
older than I be, and a mean neighbour he is, too.
Well, when he was jroingf to set married to Gretcheu
Kolp, he goes down to Parson Rogers, at Digby, to
get a license.
" ' Parson,"" says he, ' what's the price of a license?"'
" ' Six dollars,' says he.
" ' Six dollars V says Hugo ; 'that's a dreadful sight
of money ! Couldn't you take no less V
" ' No,' says he. ' That's what they cost me to the
Secretary's office at Halifax.'
" ' Well, how much do you ax for publishing in
church, then?'
" * Nothing,' says parson.
" ' Well,' says Hugo, ' that's so cheap I can't expect
you to give no change back. I think I'll be published.
How loni? does it take?'
" ' Three Sundays.'
LIFE IN A COLONY. 297
" ' Three Sundays !' says Hugo. ' Well, that's a
long time, too. But three Sundays only make a fort-
night, after all ; two for the covers and one for the
inside like ; and six dollars is a great sum of money
for a poor man to throw away. I must wait.**
" So off he went a-jogging towards home, and a-
looking about as mean as a new-sheared sheep, when
all at once a brio-ht thought came into his head, and
back he went, as hard as his horse could carry him.
" ' Parson,' says he, " IVe changed my mind. Here's
the six dollars. Ill tie the knot to-night with my
tongue, that I can't undo with my teeth.'
'' ' Why, what in uatur is the meaning of all this f
says parson.
" ' Why,' says Hugo, ' I've been ciphering it out in
my head, and it's cheaper than publishing bans, after
all. You see, sir, it's a potato-digging time ; if I
wait to be called in church, her father will have her
work for nothino- ; and, as hands are scarce and wages
high, if I marry her to-night, she can begin to dig our
own to-morrow, and that will pay for the license, and
just seven shillings over ; for there ain't a man in all
Clements that can dig and carry as many bushels in a
day as Gretchen can. And, besides, ft-esh wives, like
fresh servants, work like smoke at first, but they get
sarcy and lazy after a while.'
" Oh, my !" said Miss Lucy, " did you ever hear
the beat of that? Well, I never !"
" Now, that's what I call mean/' said Stephen.
05
«>(
2i)8 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
" Mean V said Miss Lucy, who was greatly shocked ;
'^ I guess it is mean ! I never heard anything half so
mean in all my born days !"
" Well, I have, then," continued Stephen. " It
ain't near so mean as a farmer running about the
country, dressed up in superfine broad-cloth, a-looking
out for a little office. FU tell you what, when sitia-
tions in the country fall vacant, folks to Halifax know
it as well as can be, for the town is just like a salt-
lick at the full of the moon, it's filled with stray
cattle. When father and 1 lived on Bear Eiver, and
turned the young stock out to browse in the woods,
we never took the trouble to hunt them up, for they
were always sure to come to the banks at high-water
at the full to get a drink of brine, for they are great
place-hunters, are stray cattle."
Here the little man in black, though evidently ac-
customed to these rough, rustic remarks, appeared to
wince under their application before strangers, and
made an attempt to turn the conversation, by taking a
letter out of his pocket-book, and asking Kichardson
"■ if he would do him the favour to allow him to make
him the medium of transmitting it to Halifax, having,
unfortunately, forgotten to deliver it himself."
'■' Wliich means, in plain English," said Stephen,
" you fetched it back by mistake. Why the devil
can^'t you talk plain ? There is nothing like homespun
talk and home^;puu cloth for a farmer. Fll take a
hundred of them, if you like. Let's see it !"
LIFE IN A COLONY. 299
He then took the letter, and examined the address,
and, reversing it, looked at the seal and returned it,
saying —
" Open that letter and read it to me, or I can't take
it. IVe made a vow never to carry a paper for any
man, unless I know whafs in it. I got into an awful
scrape, once, by carrying a letter that had a wafer in
it to Sir Hercules Sampson, the Governor that used
to be here a good while ago. I'll tell you how it was,
so that you may see it ain't because I don't want to
oblige you, but just to keep out of a scrape myself,
when I know I am well off. One fall, just as I was a-
startino; from home for Halifax in a vessel loaded with
apples and cider I raised on my own farm, and the
matter of five hundred boxes of smoked herrinfrs
(which I caught and cured myself), who should come
along but Pete Balcom, with a letter in his hand.
" ' Steve,' says he, 'just leave this at Government
House, will you, that's a good fellow, as soon as you
arrive in town, and I will do as much for you some
other time V
" ' Certainly,' says I ; 'but, as my hands are sort of
dirty, do you take my pocket-book out of my jacket,
and stow it away snug,' and he did so. Well, one
day, after I got to Halifax, and unloaded the vessel,
as I was a-going along the street with my working
clothes on, who should I see a-galloping along from
parade but the Governor and a couple of other officers,
with their spurs a-jangling, and their swords a-dangling.
.*)00 TUF- OLD JUDGE; OR,
and their plumes a-noddiiiir, talkiiii; and a-langhing
away like anything. Thinks I, FU just follow ou to
Government House, and give Pete Balcom's letter to
one of his hired men. So, away I goes into one of
the great stone gates, and there was trees, and gravel-
walks, and little bushes, and a sort of garden-looking
place, and a great big front door. So, I backed out,
and went up the hill, and turned into t''othcr gate, and,
as I am a living sinner, there was another pleasure-
garden-looking place, and a front door there, too.
Thinks I, Goodness me, where"'s the back porch that
common folks like me go into ? These places are only-
meant for great men and office-seekers, like our friend
Broadcloth here. So, I took a circuit all round the
house, till I came back to where I started from, like a
fellow lost in the woods, when I saw a baker drive in.
Come, says I to myself, V\\ ax no questions, for that
looks as if you did not know, but Til just follow old
Dough, for, where the bread goes, he that raises the
flour has a right to go also. Well, out he jumps from
his cart, and takes a basket of loaves on his arm, and
dives down behind an iron railing alongside of the
street-door, and I after him. Though he knew the
way, and I didn't, 1 kept close up to him for all that;
for a man that can overhaul a moose, ain't easy left
behind by a baker chap, 1 tell you. Well, we no
sooner got into the lower regions, than Sixpenny Loaf
lays down his basket, up with his whip, knocks at the
door, and oft' like a shot, leaving me and the basket there.
LIFE IN A COLONY. 301
" ' Hullo,' said I, ' Mister, deliver your own freio;ht
yourself, will you, if you please ? if s enough for me
to hand in Pete Balcom's letter j and, besides, I am a
stranger here/
"But crack went the whip, and away went the
wheels, and the only answer I got was, ' Come in.'
So I opened the door, and there was a little, thin old
lady, with spectacles on, and her two daughters hand-
somely dressed. Mother was writing in a big book
that looked to me like a merchant's ledger, and the
two young women were making a bit of carpet, with
coloured yarns, in a small-sized quiltiug-frame. Thinks
I to myself, I won''t say nothing about that trick the
feller played me with the bread. If he don't choose
to stop for his pay, he may go without it. So says I —
" ' Marm, Fve a letter for the Governor, that a
nei<Thbour of mine, one Pete Balcom, asked me to
leave here for him ;'' and I out pocket-book and gave
it to her, and she handed it to one of the galls, who
went out to hand it to some one else.
" ' Take a chair and sit down,' said old mother, quite
sociable-like. ' Be so good as to wait a moment, per-
haps his Excellency the Governor may have an answer
for you ;"" and then she went on writing as before.
" That must have been the housekeeper you saw,"
said Miss Lucy, with the patronising air of a person
that thinks they know the world ; " and what you call
bits of carpet in frames, was rug- work."
" I don't know who the plague she was," said
302 Tin: OLD JLDGH; OR,
Stephen, " nor (lon"'t care. I never saw lior before,
and I never want to see her ajrain.
" Well, as I was a-saying, that gave mo time to
cast my eye round and tliink a bit upon things in
general ; and when I seed these uice-dresscd women,
and well-furnishod room, and flowers, and what not,
thinks T, if this is your kitchen-room, what must your
parlour be ? And then T looked at my clothes all
covered with dust, a little more nor half-worn, and
looking none the better for the tar of the ves-
sel. I won't say I wished for broadcloth, for I
didn't, but I did long for my new suit of home-
spun, for I feel sort of proud of it, seeing I raised
the stuff", and my old woman wove it and made it, as
I said bc'furc.
" Well, just then in come a servant with a pair of
red breeches on, and gold garters, and white stockings
pulled up tight over a pair of legs about as big as
as big as what shall I say ? why, about as big as
your drumsticks. Broadcloth, The fellow looked as
nmch like a gentleman, and was as well dressed as an
eddy-gong, or chaplain, or whatever they call them,
and as impudent too ; for, says he, ' Follow me V quite
sliort, like a chap that has received so many orders
that he bcirins to think at last he has a rinht to give
them himself. Thinks T, natur is natur, whether it''s
on a farm or in a Governor's kitchen-room, for every-
thing gets sarcy that's well-fed and has nothing to do.
^Vell, he takes me through a long stone passage, as
LIFE IN A COLONY. 303
cold as the nateral ice-house on Granville Mountain,
and as dark too, then up a pair of stairs, and then turn
to the rioht, and then to the left, and then to the right
again, as folks tell you when you don't know the road.
It sort of crossed my mind as I followed the critter,
who seemed most too lazy to carry his shoes, I sup-
pose the Governor is going to offer me a glass of grog
for fetching that letter, and that Fll take, for thafs
sociable and civil-like, though I wouldn't take all the
money in his house, for that's mean, and don't become
Homespun.
" At last. Breeches showed me into a large un-
furnished room, without a carpet or a curtain, as bare
as my thrashing-floor, with nothen in it but two un-
stuffed wooden sofas, and a table with a large writing-
book and an inkstand on it. On one side sat a ser-
geant with his sword on, and on the other a thirteen-
penny soldier with his baggonut on, and there he left
me standino; in the middle of the room, without
saying as much as, ' By your leave,' or anything else.
In less than half-a-minute out come the Governor, a
great, tall, thin, bony man, like myself, with a bald
head, a nose as big as a brass knocker, and a pair of eyes
as sharp, bright, and wicked, as Lucifer's, {hup cervier)
with his great big sword by his side, and his spurs on,
jist as I saw him in the street, only he had his hat
with its white feathers in his hand. As soon as he
came in, up jumps the sergeant and the soldier, and
stood as straight as two ramrods.
304 Tin: OLD JUDGE; OR,
" ' How dare you hand me such a letter as that, M r.
13alconi V said he.
*' ' Governor !"■ says I,
" ' Silence !'' says he. ' It admits of no excuse.'*
" I never heard no more after tliat, I was so taken
a-back, and me with my old workin<;-clothes on, look-
ing like Old Scratch himself; but on he went, foam-
ing and roaring like a freshet, and klomping, klompiug
round on the board floor, and waving his arms like a
windmill. Tliinks I to m^-self. This is what I call an
indictment, and they are a-going to send me to the
guard-house as sure as the world ; and then I looked
first at the sergeant, and then at Thirtccnpence, and
I seed I could pitchfork them fellows out of the win-
dow as easy as a sheaf of wheat : but then there was
the Governor. If I was to lay hands on him, even in
self-defence, I knew it would be rebellion, besides
going agin the grain, for I am a loyal man, and so was
my father before me ; and besides that, I warn't sure
I could handle him either if I was to try. Then I
thought l\\ make a run for it, and if I had known the
way, I think I should ; but what in the world can you
do in a house that has as many doors in it, a*'niost, as
there are dajs in the year ? So I made up my mind
to face it like a man.
" ' Governor," says I, ' will you just answer me one
question V
"• ' Silence, Mr. Balcom !' says he ; 'I have nothing
to say to you.''
LIFE IN A COLONY. 305
i.i I
Man alive; says I, ' do you call all this saying
nothing I Besides, my name ain't Balcom, and never
was, I tell you. You have got in a wrong pew, you
may depend,'
" ' What the devil is your name, thenf says he.
" ' Why, folks call me Stephen Richardson, when I
am at home,' says I ; ' and I know no more about that
letter than the man in the moon. I only brought it
just to oblige you and Pete Balcom.'
" ' Why didn't you tell me that before V says he.
" ' Because you wouldn-t let me,' says I.
" With that he half turned and waived his hand,
and the sergeant and the soldier sprung forward, and,
as I thought they were a-going for to seize me, and I
knowed I hadn't done nothing wrong, except not dres-
sing myself decent, I stepped back as quick as wink
two paces, and squared off.
" ' Stop !' says I. ' The first man that lays a hand
on me, I'll level him as flat as a pancake : so stand
clear.'
" The Governor laughed right out at that, and the
two soldiers opened the front door to let me out, instead
of leading me all round by the kitchen, the way I
came in ; and up steps Sir Hercules, and says he —
" ' You are a fine, manly fellow, and I admire your
spirit. I wish I had a battalion of such men as you
are. I am very sorry for the mistake. I beg your
pardon,' and so on.
" Well, when a great man like a Go vera or conde-
306 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
scends that way to liuuible himself to a poor mau, to
say he begs his pardon, it kind of overcomes you, and
cools you down as quick as a cup of water does a kettle
of boiling maple sap.
" ' I don't blame you a morsel,"" says I, '■ Governor :
but I blame Pete Balcom, though : he hadn't ought to
have made a fool of me after that fashion. This is the
lirst office ever I filled in my life, and that was none
of my seeking being a letter-carrier; and when I get
home ril give Pete Balcom the first quarter's salary
in the shape of as good a licking as ever he got since
he was born, and then I'll resign the commission.'
" ' No, no, my good friend,' said the Governor,
patting me good-naturedly on the shoulder, ' pray
don't break the peace ; I should be very sorry to be
the cause of any further annoyance to you.'
" But I didn't promise him, for when T promise I
keep my word : and, beside, he sort of looked at me as
if he wouldn't care much if I did give him a quilting.
Well, the first time I met Mister Pete Balcom after I
returned home, I just up and says —
" ' Pete,' says I, ' what was in that letter of yours
that you gave me to take to the Governor V
"• ' What is that to you V says he.
" "• It is a good deal to me,' I said ; ' for I want to
know what sort of business I was partner in V
" ' Well, ask about and fijid out,' said he, quite
sarcy.
" 'I'll get it out of you as I get my wheat out of
LIFE IN A COLONY. 307
the ear, by thrashing it out,' says I. 'So here's at
you ;■" and I turned to, and I gave such a tanteening
as he never had since he was raised, I know. The
postage of that letter came to a round sum, you may
depend. I got sued for an assault, was dragged
through two courts, and got cast in ten pounds'
damage, and twenty pounds' cost ; and whafs more,
after all, never found out to this day what was in that
letter. Since then I've made a vow never to carry a
paper for any man, unless he first shows me whafs in
it. If you don't think proper, therefore, to break the
seal of that one, and read it to me, you may send it
by some one else, and there is an end of it."
After some general and desultory conversation, my
friend Barclay related the particulars of an apparition
that had been much talked of at Halifax lately ; and,
for the purpose of drawing out a story from Richard-
son, which he knew he was very fond of telling, asked
him if he believed in the existence of ghosts ?
" Well, I don't know," said Stephen ; " I didn't
used to oncet upon a time, but I've larned better now.
I am not a man that's easily darnted. A feller that's
had a fair stand-up fight with a she-bear weighing six
hundred weight, and nothing but a jack-knife in his
fist to defend himself with, as I have, and killed her
too — ay, and skinned her arterwards, don't deserve to
be called a coward, 1 know. I warn't brought up in
the woods to be scared by an owl, I tell you ; and,
therefore, what I say I'll stand to. I have seed a
308
THE UI.D JLDGE; oil,
ghost, ay, and fit with a gliost, too : and look here,''
(and, undoing his cravat, ho exhibited tlie back part of
his neck), " look liere, tliere's the marks of its teeth ;
that I shall carry to the grave with me. It was old
Judge JJeler's ghost. You have hoern tell of old
Judge Boler, and how oneasy he was, seein" that he
never was buried, haven't you f
None of the company had come from that part of
the country where Stephen lived, therefore, no one
knew of a circumstance which had occurred in the
early settlement of the province, and all answered
in the negative.
'' Not hear of Judge Belcr !" he said. " Well,
that's strange, too ! I thouglit everybody had heard
of him and Jiis ghost. Well," says Steve, '' FU tell
you. There is Digby, do you see, as might be there,"
pointing with the handle of his whip to the floor;
'* well, away up there," jx)inting to another spot, " is
Annapolis, as you might say ; and there they stand,
one at each end of the basin, looking at each other,
but just twenty miles off" by water, like two folks at
each end of a long election table. Well, all up this
side of the basin is Clements Township, stretching
right away from one town to the other. Well, when
the country was first settled after the American
rebellion, this Clements was laid out for the Dutch
and Germans that served in the war. There was
three locations : one on the shore, and that the Long
Island Dutch lived on ; behind that was another
LIFE IN A COLONY. 809
range given to the Waldeck soldiers ; and behind that
another called the Hessian line, because the Hessians
had lands laid off to them there.
" In those days, there were nothing but bridle-
roads, because they always rode on horseback when
they didn't walk ; but they warn't turnpiked up for
wheels as they are now into highways. Weil, among
the Long Island loyalists, there was one Judge Beler —
at least, so they used to call him. He warn't like
our supreme judges, regular halter-broke and trained,
but a sort of magistrate jddge, and in his own country
(New York State) belonged to a kind of sheep-skin
court, as folks nicknamed them. Still he was called
Judge, and was a man well-to-do in the world, and
well-known, and liked all through them settlements,
and spoke German like a book, and could crack up all
the hard lumps of words like a harrow, into powder,
as fine as a b, ah. Well, he used to be often riding
away back into the Hessian line, and spendino- a few
days there. Sometimes they said he was surveyino-
land, and laying off lots. At other times, they said
he went to chat at old JSiilner's (not old Tom's that's
there now, but old Tom's father's), and talk and tight
over the battles of the rebellion war ; and sometimes
they said the Judge — for he warn't by no manner of
means up in years — used to go to see Vogler Vroom's
daughter, old Mrs. Wagner that was afterwards.
Minna Vroom, they say, Avas a rael fine gall in her
day, full of health, and strength, and spirits, as a
310 THE OLD JUDGE J OR,
four-year old colt, and yet a great housekeeper too.
Judiiiiio: of her as she was when I seed her, which
was long after she had lost the mark of mouth ""
" ^^'hy, Mr. Stephen, ain't you ashamed to talk
that way of the ladies?" said Miss Lucy.
" A body could hardly believe she ever was so un-
common handsome (but then there ain't a wrinkled
old woman in the country they don't say was pretty
oncet) ; for she must have always been a little too
much of the Dutch build for figure, according to my
notions ; too short, too squftre about the "
" Never mind describing her," said Miss Lucy :
" go on with the story. There is nothing in nature
I am so fond of as a good ghost story."
" Well, I never knew it fail," replied Stephen :
" one handsome woman never cares to hear about
another handsome w'oman. Her father, by all accounts,
was plaguy well off, and as she was an only child, if
the Judge's mouth watered when he looked on Minna,
and thouoht of the beautiful rolls of yarn and home-
spun, and fat hams, and smoked beef, that were hang-
ing about so tempting, not to speak of the yellow
and white shiners tied up in the long stockings in the
big chests, — why it ain't to be wondered at, that's all.
Maybe he did, and maybe he didn't; but most likely
he went like other folks on his own business, whatever
it was, whenever he liked, and whenever ho pleased,
and gave no account and axed no leave. Well, oncet
he went, and, faith, he never retunied again. It was
LIFE IN A COLONY. Sll
in the forepart of winter 1786, as I have heard tell.
Folks down to the shore thought the Judge was pay-
ing a long visit, and wondered he didn't come back ;
and people on the Hessian line road thought it was a
long time since he had gone home, and wondered he
didn't come to see them again. At last, it was as
clear as mud he was missing. Some thought he had
got lost in the woods, others thought he had got
scalped and killed by the Indians, and some reckoned
he had got a cold shoulder from Minna Vroom, and
that he had taken it so much to heart he had left the
country ; and nobody knew anything for sartain.
" Well, days and weeks passed on and passed on,
and no tidings was ever heard of him, and at last
folks gave over talking of him, and he was sort of
forgot and out of mind. For time, like the big roller
of the Agricultural Society, as it rolls on, fetches all
things to a level, or presses them into the earth out
of sight, so that they don't attract attention no more.
And queer sort of farmers books make too : first they
plough up land to make it loose and light, and then
they roll it as hard as ever, and undo all they have
done, and that they call science ; and it may be science,
but it ain't common sense, and don't stand to reason.
But that's neither here nor there, and, as I was a-
saying, one day the next spring, just as the lakes had
opened, Frederic Crowse was ranging about the woods
for a stick to make ox-bows of, when who should he
see in the middle of the great lake near the Hessian
812 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
road but Judge Jk'ler, seated as quiet and as iiateral
on his horse as life ! There was a httle wind at the
time, and a ripph> on the water, and the Judge was
riding with his head towards home, and his horse
making a slow motion like a canter, but not advancing
forward a bit. At first, he thou<irht he was swiiuniini:
the lake, for that would make a very short cut for
him, and he stood a while and stared at him ; but
seein' that he didn't go ahead, he called out to him as
loud as he could call.
"'Judge!' said he; but the Judge didn't look
round.
" ' Squire !' said he; but the squire didn't speak.
"'Mr. Beler !' said he; but Mr. Beler didn't
answer, but just went on rising and bending to every
wave like a bow of the body, but still remaining in
one spot.
"'Good gracious!' says Fred to himself; 'the
water is so shocking cold at this season of the year, it
has almost chilled him to death. What onder the
sun shall I do V
" Well, away he went asliard as he could run for
his life, and alarmed all the neighbours, and down
they came, with axes, and ropes, and tools, and what
not, and made a raft, and put off into the lake to help
him. 'i'he sun was just then setting as they shoved
out from the shore, and when they got about halfway
to him they saw that his eyes were gone, and his face
was all swelled, and his iUsh wa^^i bleached, and bloated,
LIFE IN A COLONY. 313
and slimy, and that he looked awful bad ; and they
were dreadfully frightened."
" Oh, my !" said Miss Lucy, " how horrid ! But
it's a beautiful story: go on !" And she drew her chair
nearer to Richardson.
" Well, they were skeered to go up to him," con-
tinued Stephen ; " and they stopped, awed like, and
gazed and gazed, without saying a word ; and when
they give over rowing, the judge and his horse gra-
dually settled down, slowly — slowly — slowly, until
nothin' but his head was above water, and then he re-
mained for a minute or two longer, as if he didn't like
to leave his old friends for ever and ever, and down he
went altogether, and sunk to the bottom.
" It would have been no more than decent and
neighbourly, perhaps," he added, "to have fished him
up, and given him Christian burial. But I won't say
fished him up, neither ; for, poor man, he was passed
that, I guess, unless they had baited their hook with
Minna Vroora, and that would have made him jump
out of the water like a salmon, I do suppose. Many
a man has been cauo-ht...."
" Why, Mr. Richardson, how you talk !" said Miss
Lucy ; " it's actually ondeeent that — it's shockino- !
You ought to be ashamed of yourself, so you ought."
" Well, grappled him up, then," he said: "for
folks that are neglected that way by all the world, ex-
cept by frogs and pollywogs, are oneasy, and walk
and he has terrified the whole country ever since
VOL. I. p
314 THE OLD JUDGE; OR,
The old stock of them that knew him never mentioned
him without fear ; and some said that they had actu-
ally seen him afterwards in that lake (which now goes
by the name, and I suppose always will, of Belcr's
Lake). Well, the next generation, though they be-
gan to frighten children, by telling them they would
send for the Judge if they behaved bad, soon gave
over that sort of idle talk, and said there was no doubt
he was up and stirring sometimes. Many people de-
clared that they had heard him, in the winter time,
nmttering under the ice, in some unknown tongue ;
for the German language has long since gone out in
those parts. I know my father said he oncest seed
him gallop like mad on his old black mare across that
lake in a snow squall, and sink through the ice with a
report like a cannon. And old Dr. Uoehme said he
had known strange noises there, quite near ; and when
he'd stop to listen, he would hear the same at the
other end of the lake, as if he was trying to get
through ; and then he wouhl hear him strike the bot-
torn of the ice with his fist such a blow, that it seemed
as if it would crack it clear across, though it was three
feet thick.
" Well, I never met that man yet that I was afraid
of; and as for ghosts, I never see one in all my born
days, and did n't believe there was any, and therefore
couldn't tell whether I was skeered or not. Still,
somehow or another, it was a melancholy, dismal place,
for no one would settle near it, and I can't say I much
LIFE IN A COLONY. 315
liked going by there alone, for it ain't pleasant to think
of spirits and such things in the dark, if you have no
one to talk to. I won't say, nether, I haven't heard
those noises myself, especially when the lake is a-going
to break up in the spring ; and I have heard some of
those awful reports, like thunder in the ice, too, but I
am not certain I haven't heard the same under other
lakes ; at all events, though they made me feel kind of se-
rious like, they never skeered me. Well, one night — it
was on the 1 7th of March, I recollect the day, for I was
at Pat Doyle's that afternoon at Digby, and he said it
was St. Patrick's day, and I drank a considerable some,
though not to say I warn't sober, nether — when I came
to the lake, it was a little after daylight down, just twi-
light enough to see the road, and much as a bargain, too,
when I heard this rumbling under the ice, a rolling,
moaning, hoarse, onnateral kind of sound, and then came
one of those cracks that go off like a twelve-pounder.
" ' Hullo !' says I to myself, ' the old Judge is on-
easy to-night ; howsumever, I never hurt a hair of his
head, and he has no call to me, good or bad ; so, dead
or alive, I don't fear him.'
" Just then, I sartainly did hear a most powerful
yell. It went through me like lightning, and seemed
to curdle my very blood. Oh ! it was an awful scream,
you may depend, and seemed onearthly like, or as if
the devil was in the unburied human that gave it. I
stopped a moment, and all was still again, but the
hollow, rumblin', echo-like voice under the ice.
p 2
'316 THE OLD JUDGE ; OR,
" ' What in the world is all this V says I to my-
self; 'as sure as fate, Beler's ^host is no joke, but
downright reality. There's no mistake. Y\\ take my
oath I hoard that scream of his, and I think, Steve,
you had better be a-jogging on towards home, or you
may hear what ain"'t good for your hearing, and see
what ain't good for sore eyes.'
" So I just gave the beast a tap of the whip, and
moved on. Well, as soon as you leave the lake, you
come to a sharp pinch of a hill, and then you go down
into a steep, heavy-wooded hollow, and then mount
another smart hill, and pass on. This happened
twenty-five years ago next March, and at that time it
was still little more than a bridle-path, and the trees
lapped across it in places. Now, in that hollow, two
larc-e hemlocks had got canted well over on one side,
windfalls like, and were catched by two large spruces
on the other ; so there was just room to stoop low
down on the saddle, and squeeze under, and much as
ever, too — almost a scrape. Having rid that way in
the morning, I knew the track, kept to the left, bent
forward on the neck of the horse, and went through.
Just as I cleverly cleared it, old Beler sprung right
on the crupper, seized me round the waist, and yelled
just as he did when he got out of the lake, first in one
ear and then in the other. Oh, how the woods rung !
His breath was so hot, it most scalded me, and the
scream cut me through the head like a knife ; and
then ho clasped me so tight round the body, he near
LIFE IN A COLONY. 817
about squeezed the wind out of me. If I didn't sing
out, it's a pity, and the more I hollered, the louder
he shrieked. I won't pretend for to go for to say that
I warn't friffhtened, because that wouldn't be true ; 1
was properly skeered, that's a fact. I expected every
minute to be clawed off, and plunged into the lake.
I didn't know what to do. Human strength, 1 knew,
was of no avail agin supernateral beings, so I took tc
prayer.
" 'Our Father....' says I.
" The moment I said that, he let go yellin', and
seized me by the nape of the neck with his teeth, and
bit right through the grizzle. Oh, it was a powerful
nip, that ! the pain was enough to drive one mad, and
I fairly roared like a bull, it hurt me so.
" In the mean time, the horse began to rear and
plunge most furiously ; for the poor dumb animal
knew, as well as could be, it had a ghost-rider, besides
its lawful master, to carry. At last, it kicked so like
old Scratch, it sent us both flying heels over head, the
Judo-e on one side, and me on the other side of it. I
fortunately held on to the rein, and jumped up like
winkin', and the horse stood head to him, snorting
and blowing like a porpoise. I shall never forget that
scene, the longest day I ever live. The Judge had
no hat on ; his face was all hairy and slimy ; his eyes
looked some wild animal's, they had such a fiery, rest-
less, wicked glance, which I expect was the ghost
lookino" out of the dead sockets of the unburied skele-
p3
318 THE OLD JLDGK; OR,
ton — at least, that's my idea of it ; and his teeth was
the only white-lookinj^ thing about him : but then,
teeth last a long time, particularly when kept from the
air, under water, in the long matted grass and lily-
roots, I hardly got a real good look at him, before
lie rolled himself up into a ball, like a porcupine, and
shrieked — oh, how ho shrieked ! I heard hira after-
wards, for the matter of three or four minutes, (for you
may depend I didn't stay to keep him company longer
than I could help) while I was galloping off as hard as
ever my horse could lay legs to the ground. I wouldn't
encounter that old Judire amn, for anythino; in this
blessed world. That's the first, and the last, and the
only time I ever see a ghost ; and I never desire to
see another."
" What did your neighbours think of that story ?"
said IJarclay.
" Well, I didn't want to brag," said Stephen ;
" but, since you've axed the question, this I will say
tor myself^ — there never was a man in the whole county
of Annapolis, that so nmch as even hinted that he
didn't believe it, except old Parson Rogers, of Digby ;
and plague take me if I think them ministers believe
half tliey preach themselves, they are so loath to be-
lieve other folks. The parson one day jist up and
axed me all about it.
" ' Steve,' says he, ' they tell me you have seen the
old Judge ; is that true ?'
*' ' Oh, parson !' says I, ' now you are only a goin'
LIFE IN A COLONY. S19
for to banter me ; let me alone, now, thafs a good
soul, for that ain't a subject to banter on ; and I
might say something I would be sorry for, perhaps.""
" ' I am not a going to tease you, Stephen,' he
said : ' I really want to hear it as it happened, if it
ever did happen. They say you had a hard struggle
with him ; is that true V
" ' True as gospel,"" says I.
" ' Were you quite sober that night, Steve,"" said
he. ' You know, folks sometimes see double on St.
Patrick's Day.""
" ' See !"" says I, ' parson ; I not only see him, but
felt him, too. Look here, where he left the marks of
his teeth on me !' and I stripped and showed him the
scars. ' Do you believe now r says I. •
" ' I never heard that ghosts had teeth before,
Steve,' said he, most provokin' cool — ' no, never.'
" ' Did you ever see onef says I ; 'so come, now,
answer me that.'
" ' No, says he ; ' I never saw one, and never ex-
pect to.'
" ' How the plague can you tell, then,' says I,
' whether they have teeth or not ? But I have seen
one, do ye mind : and I can swear they have teeth —
plaguy sharp ones, too — breath as hot as a tea-kettle,
and claws as long and as strong a bear.'
" ' Stephen,' said he, ' my son, I didn't think you
were so easily frightened.'
" ' Frightened !' says I ; and I began to get cross
320 Tin-: OLD jrnr.E ; or,
with his banter, as if I would go for to toll a lie, or be
such a fool as uot to know what I was a talking about
— ' frightoueJ, is it V said I ; ' ifs more than ever
you could do to skeer me, though you have been
preachiu' against the devil and all his imps ever since
1 was boni. But do you go to Bcler'^s Lake on St.
Patrick's night, and if the Judge is to home, and a
talking and a stirring under water, do you ondervalue
him as 1 did, and say you ain't afraid of him, dead or
alive, and if he don't frighten you into believing what
you hear, and believing what you see, and into know-
inor the difterence between a bite and a kiss, then you
are a braver man than I take you to be, that's all.'
"'I'll go with you the next 17th day of March,'
said he.
" ' Thank you,' said I ; ' I'd rather be excused.""
" ' Well, I'll go with or without you, just as you
please, on the 17th of next March, if you will first
go to Nick Wyland's, and see that Colonel Brown's
crazy boy (the one that roasted his brother) is well
chained up. It's my opinion that that mischievous
maniac broke loose, or slipped out that night, and
attacked you ; and the only wonder is that, with his
superhuman strength, he didn't kill you. You had a
great escape. But as for a ghost, Steve — '
" *■ Parson,' says I, ' do you believe the ]Jible ?'
" ' Yes,' says he, ' I do.'
" ' Well, then,' says 1, ' believe in Judge Beler's
ghost. I have seen him, and heard him, and felt him,
LIFE IN A COLONY. 321
and have the marks to prove it. You are Parson
Rogers, ain't you V
" ' Yes.'
^' ' Well, so jou are ; but how do I know it ? Because
Tve seen you, heard you, and felt you. Well, that's
the way I know the ghost. I tell you, I have heard,
seen, and felt Judge Beler's ghost.' "
END OF VOL. I.
F. Shoberl, Jun.. Printer to H.R.H. Prince Albert, Rupert St.. Haymarket.
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