ML so I W64a 1 UC-NRLF B ^ 337 SMh NEW SATIRICAL COMIC OPERA IN TWO ACTS LIBRETTO^fj^VMUSIC BY ^ ENJAMIN E.WQOLF PUBLISHED BY 545 WASHINGTON ST. BOSTON PDUNCE & CD.^ Or, capital vs. labor. Producedffor the first time on any stage by Collier's standard Opera Conipariy, AT THE BIJOU THEATRE, BOSTON, Thursday Evening, April 19, 1883. Thomas Pounce. The head of the firm of Pounce & Co., Mr. E. P. Temple ; George Spoke. Captain of the Bicycle Club . . . Mr. ^Y. H. Pessenden ]>HTT TT> TvRF ) ("...,. Mr. A. Kammerlee I Arthur Dobbins, otherwise Lord Alfred Peerage . Mr. Harry Pepper I Oliver Grip. A man for a' that Sig. Brocolini Jack Spindle. A son of toil, contented . . . . Mr H. F. Fairweather DiGGORY EUGGS. x ( MR. ANDREW MeTZGER nmir MTTPfts / ) • Mr. John P. Savage ""k t.:::.- ^^"^ °"°"' «-»"*«"'«'• . . mb. ^..... ...... : Ned Si.ugos. > ^- ■ ■ Mb. D. P. Steele j AN"B i William Crank. The silent partner Mr. Henry E. Dixey i Polly Chromo Miss Gertrude Franklin i Eleanor. ) ( Miss Janet Edmondson 1 Sylvia. V Daughters of Pounce. ] Miss Sylvia Gerrish i MILICENT. ) ( Ml«« ^''^ ^^^^^^ I Esther. ) ( M^®^'' Hattie Delaro 1 Laura.' h Daughters of Crank. ] Miss Madelaine Dixon i oiiviA ) ( Mis-^ ^^^'^^ ^^^^"^ I IPHIGENIA. 1 r Miss JENNIE MCNULTY I ANTIGONE. I MISS RUTH STETSON I Andromache. ' ^,. , ^^,^^^^^ J Miss May Steele ..,,„,., ^ Is leces ot Pounce. ^ Miss Estelle Jenness ViEDEA. 1 I ' I JOCASTA. I I MISS FANNIE KNIGHT i Electka. J ^ MISS Edith Abell ! Work-people, members of the Bicycle Club, etc. I ACT L -MANSION AND GROUNDS OF POUNCE & CO. i ACT IL - INTERIOR OF THE SILK FACTORY. i j TIME — A PROBABLE FUTURE. 1 "O Tempoua Mutantuk." 0^c-l^ _e.p -^K^ OI^IQIJ^^L COMIC OPERyi.*^- IN TWO ACTS. ^^-i^HBEIlITO AHB IIUSIO BtG^^ Author of " The Mighty Dollar," " Doctor oTAlcantaira," " Lawn Tennis," etc. .PU BLISHED By ^ :-#-COLLIER & RICE-# $f3f- Messrs. Collier 8s Rice have the exclusive control of this opera in the United States and Canadas. Copyright, Bt B. E. WooLF, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED, f. '^cdrr Smith ML so POUNCE & CO ACT I. Scene. A handsome garden, prettily arranged for a merry-making. At rise of curtain, ^corkmen and work-girls in holiday attire, discovered. , Chorus. There is no firm of which we know That can compare with Pounce «fc Co. Whene'er we will we take our ease. And only labor when we please. Men. We doubt if anywhere there be Such happy sons of toil as we. AVOMEN. And daughters! Men, No offence to you ; We meant to say, and daughters, too! TlTTTI. Then many blessings on the head Of Thomas Pounce be ever shed; And mav a due proportion go On that of WilUam Crank, the Co. Spindle. We want for nothing! TUTTI. Very true! Spindle. We reign supreme! TUTTI. We do; we do. Sptxdi.e. In fact, we could, if we saw fit, Be masters here. TUTTI. Xo doubt of it. Spindle. And knowing this, I 'think we may Without the least compunction say, TuTTi. There is no firm of which we know That can compare with Pounce & Co. Whene'er we will we take our ease, And only labor when we please. ^359520 POUNCE & CO Women {argumentatively). And very proper, too. Men {frankly). We quite agree with you. But still the facts remain; and so We wish success to Pounce & Co. ! Ti TTi. Success to Pounce & Co.! Enter Polly Chkomo. Polly (gayly). So you are here I AVoMEN {disdainfully). Decidedly! Since nowhere else we chance to be.- Polly {wounded and tearfully). Please, to-day, don't snub me so! That you dislike me well I know. Men {sympathetically). We like you, Polly! Yes, we do! Polly (naively). But I want them to like me, too! I cannot gain their approbation Because I 'm not above my station. Women (with contemptuous indignation). Above your station? Men (remonstrating). Polly, dear. Don't use that sort of language here! Oblige us! Do oblige us, pray! Polly (piqued). Well, I have nothing more to say Except that folks in humble places Should not indulge in airs and graces. Song. — Polly. "^^ Life is ever as we make it ; Sad or happy, as we take it. Then enjoy it, And employ it, In laughing and singing, And merrily flinging All envy, for aye, Far away. We cannot change the decree of fate By even the hardest endeavor; So on its pleasure we all must wait, For aid us, complaining can never. Crows, you 're aware, gorgeous peacocks are not, Still may a crow be content with his lot, And have his measure Of pleasure. Yes ! that is so. You well know POUNCE & CO. Women. Men. Station high or low is naught, Merely viewed as station. How to till it is the thought That calls for cogitation. Why should you scorn my ambition To take with content my position? No fate so perverse That it could not be worse, — Except — and to this you "11 agree — 'T was already as bad as it ever could be. Life is ever as we take it, etc. And very proper, too! We quite agree with you ! We therefore will resume, and so We wish success to Pounce & Co. Omnes. Success to Pounce & Co. Enter Grip, followed hy Ruggs, Mugos, Tuggs, and Sluggs. Grip (recti.). What do I hear? You wish success To those who honest toil oppress? It makes my indignation kindle ! Where is your manhood, Mr. Spindle? Ruggs, Muggs, Tuggs, and Sluggs. It makes our indignation kindle, Where is your manhood, Mr. Spindle? Spindle. For you, and for your censorship, I have no answer, Mr. Grip. Omnes (except Grip and followers). For you, and for your censorship, We have no answer, Mr. Grip. Grip (sardonically). Ha, ha! Ruggs (and followers). Ha, ha! Grip AVill no wrongs make yoi;r bosoms burn? D' ye think you 're worms, that you spin silk? Know that at times the worm will turn, Polly. And so at times will milk! Omnes (Grip and followers sardonically). Ha, ha! Ha, ha! POUNCE & CO. Song. — GRir. We are the noble sons of toil. And from morn to eve we m. \Ve will, we will! Poi XI K. The upshot of which is, that Pounce & Co. do not in:.ke any money. Omnes. They don't, they don't! Grip (sardonically). Ha, ha, ha! l^VGGH and comjjanions. Ha, ha, ha! (Deliberately.) Pounce (to them). You do not seem to be happy. Y^ou have no fault to find, I hope. Crip. Salmon and green peas have been in for a month, and also spring lamb; and we have not had as much as a smell of them. Pounce. Bless me! Have n't you? It shall be remedied ;d once. Puggs. The lobster bisque we had for dinner yesterday was ^•( ry badly cooked and wretched m flayor. Pounce. Ah! Mr. Crank, why was this? But I forget. You are a silent partner and cannot speak. MuGGS. And the pate de foie has been anything but first-class ol" late. TuGGS. Moreover, the new cook has not the slightest idea of a mayon- naise. 12 POUNCE & CO. Sluggs. And I have twice had to use milk on my early strawberries instead of cream. Grip. While I 'm utterly tired of the eternal fillet nml mushrooms, and would like a chantje. For scK {hew lldeyed). By all means! Anymore'? Polly, as the prin- cipal grumbler in the mill, you surely must have some fault to lind. Polly. Yes; I ran a pin into my finger this morning, and donH want it to happen again. Pounce. It sha' n't, it sha' n't! Your comfort must be obtained at nny cost, or the whole purpose of my life is defeated. Capital is the servant of labor, not labor that of capital. Is it not so, Mr. Crank'? Excuse me. As a silent partner you cannot speak. But enough of this! Go and enjoy yourselves. The nmsicians are i-eady and waiting for you. You will have a great treat. They are going to play Liszt's "Inferno "for you. Mr. Crank will see to your comfort in his efficiently silent manner, as a silent partner. Chorus. Sound, sound the lyre To Thomas Pounce, Esquire 1 Exeunt Polly, Crank, and work-people. Grip and ru^ companions (JO last, in a gloomy and discontented manner. Pounce. I am afraid I have undertaken too much in trying to make these people entirely happy. But I '11 persevere. I wish my girls would take more kindly to them. But they scorn to recognize the son of toil as their equals. And Crank's daughters, too ! I should think, however, that they might refrain from saying anything, as their father is only a silent partner. There are my nieces, also, which my poor sister left me when she left the world. They, too, although they have nothing, object to my work-people for hus- bands. But I have registered a vow that they all shall wed no- body else. If I could only induce them to unite themselves to my laborers, what a delightful family we should be! It would make a perfect union of capital and labor ; and the ambition of my exist- ence would culminate. I could then die in peace. As it is, when I speak to them about it, I am more in danger of dying in pieces. (Looks off L.) Hello I my daughters ! POUNCE & CO. 13 Concerted Scene. EnUr Eleanor, Milicent, and Sylvia, each with a bouquet. Eleanor, Milicent, and Sylvia. Dear papa, one moment I pray. AVe bring to you, each, a bouquet. In manifestation Of congratulation And daughterly love on this day. Pounce (affected). Children, my feelings I scarce can compose; A blessing apiece a fond father bestows. Enter Esther, Laura, and Olivia, each with a bouquet. Esther, Laura, and Olivia. And, dear Mr. Pounce, let us show. In the very slight gift we bestow. With this genuflection (courtesy all) The sincere affection That unto pa's partner we owe. Pounce (moved). Girls, I can't tell how my nature you touch, You honor me truly too much. Much too much! All the Girls. At some other time That perhaps might be so ; But certainly not On your birthday, j^ou know. Pounce. How silly I am. I your pardon implore : But I failed to perceive it In that light before. Enter Antigone, Iphigenia, Andromache, Medea, Jocasta, and Electra, carrying bouquets of blackberries in their bosoms, and black fans in their hands. Iphigenia bears a wreath of cypress. Antigone and companions. Dear uncle, we come our best duty to pay. And to wish very many returns of the day. What we owe unto you we will never forget. And your kindness to us you will never regret. Let this attitude (prayerfully) Speak our gratitude. As our gift on your cranium we set. They jilace cypress wreath on his hm.d. Pounce (diffidently). AVTiy, really and truly. You praise me unduly. 14 POUNCE & CO. All the (iiuL ; (rrmonstrating). Oh, no! Xot at all! 'T is but right. Pounce {f^wiyt^ucdy). It seems quite excessive! Girls (apologetically). We hope not oppressive":' Pounce (considerately). Oh, no! Girls (very earnestly). On your wordy Pounce (with hand on heart). Honor brijzhtl Girls. Then, pry thee, have no more to say. But take in a sensible way Our manifestation Of congratulation And joy on this notable day. Pounce (weeping). Xo more, then, no more! Eleanor. You are now sixty-four. If in twelve months from this you 're alive There 's scarcely a doubt You will live this year out And most likely attain sixty-five. Ensemble. You are now sixty-four, etc. Pounce and Girls. 'Twill ensue. It is true I Pounce. Ah, girls, you make me very happy, — except when you make me miserable. Eleanor. But, papa, our only object in life is to make you happy. Pounce. And, my dear child, rny only object in life is to be made happy. That being the case, why don't you do as I wish and marry — Eleanor. Your workmen? Never. Electra. Except me! I '11 marry anybody. Pounce. Dear child I so would I were 1 in your place. (To the others,) But let me tell you that, though you despise the hum- ble workingman, an honest heart beats in his breast. Eleanor. Where would you have it beat, papa? Pounce. True; Ididn'tthmk of that. However, seeing all I have done for you, I think you might gratify me in such a trifle as mar- riage. Eleanor. But, papa, in an affair that concerns our ])api)iness — Pounce. Your happiness? Is a father's happmess nothmg? And as for a husband, what can it matter to you whether you make one man miserable, or another? But as you will. You don't marry with my consent unless you marry my way. Electra. I '11 marry your way or any way. POUNCE & CO. 15 ¥ouNCB (affectionately). J know yon will, darling. You are the only obedient one of the lot, and I wish from my heart that somebody had you. You would prove a mother to him. (Kisses her.) But I must go and look after the comfort of my people. Enjoy yourselves in the mean while, and take my advice. Song and Chorus. Pounce. You want a husband? Girls. Yes, we do! Pounce. Then pocket the first that comes to you ! The only way To make your hay Is while the sun is shining! Girls. But hay is not the thing we need, We want a mate for life ! Pounce. Indeed? Then take what I To you supply. Or else go on repining! Exit Pounce. Eleanor. He is careful enough about the happiness of his work- people, but he cares nothing for ours. Esther. It is certainly romantic to stoop from our high position to wed an inferior. Elp.anor. Yes; but it would be fully as romantic if we didn't stoop at all, and married an equal. Sylvia. Or still more romantic, if somebody stooped from a high position to marry one of us. Eleanor. Ah I you refer, perhaps, to Arthur Dobbins; or, in other words, to Lord Alfred Peerage. Omnes (admiringly). Ah! Elkctra. Ileighol Eleanor. What a grand idea for a lord to come to the mill to learn a trade in case he should ever become poor! Electra. But he does n't work, unless smoking cigarettes and reading the last new novel means work. . Sylvia. / found reading the last new novel to be very haixi work! But isn-t he lovely! Omnes (sigJimg). Oh! Eleanor. And we 're all in love with him! Omnes. We are! 16 POUNCE & CO. Electra. I are — I mean I am ! Eleanor. But we can't all have him, you know, under the existing state of the marriage laws; and, as he hasn't yet made a choice of any one of us, we must, of course, look out for ourselves and not neglect our other opportunities. Electra. When we get them. Esther (looking off). Bless me! Look! There are the bicycle young men, returning to their camp. Electra (craning eagerly on tiptoe). So they are; the darlings! Sylvia. But why do bicycle young men go into campV Eleanor. I can't imagine, unless it be for the common weal. Esther (ecstatically). Ah! what joy to be a bicycle rider. What a repose It must be to the weary head to be able to throw all one's thinking into the feet! Sylvia (dreamily). When I see a daring rider mounted on his fiery bicycle, speeding along over pebbles and across ruts, and jolting up and down, I envy him the exquisite illusion that he is enjoying himself. Such touching beliefs in the impossible are, alas, too rare! Esther. Ah, yes! How earnest he looks. Eleanor. And how hopelessly sad ! A bicycle rider has never been seen to smile. There must be some hidden mystery, like Free- masonry, some deep heart anguish that drives an mnocent fellow- being to bicycle riding. Electra (convulsively). Oh, lovely thought! Esther. They go on their way as if they were performing some solemn penance. Sylvia. As if they were ready to preach a sermon. Eleanor. Or, rather, had just heard one. Electra (waving her handkerchief off). Poetic b<^ings; I love you all I How d' ye do? E LEANOR. Oh , for shame ! Omnes. That is n't fair. Eleanor. I do believe they are coming this way. They are coming. See what you have done, Electra. Girls, shall we run away, or stand our ground bravely? Electra. I run away from no man. Esther. I have frequently observed that in you. Eleanor. We will scorn to fly. But we must not be taken by sur- prise. Let us do something! Omnes. But what? POUNCE & CO. 17 Eleanor. Ah, yes! AVe will be discovered studying our French lesson, and refuse to notice them. Omnes. Yes, yes! (All the girls take small books from their pockets or reticules and begin to study.) Concerted Scene. Omnes. J^aime, I love; Tu aimes^ thou lovest; H aime, he loves ! Nous aimons^ we love; Vous aimez, you love; lis aiment, they love ! 'T is pleasure all other above In studying Aimer, to love. J^amais, I was loving; Tu aimais, thou wert loving; II aimait, he was loving! Ifous amions, we were loving; Vous aimiez, you were loving; Us aimaient, they were loving. Yes, 'tis pleasure all other above, In studying Aimer, to love. Electra {fervently). tPaime, 1 love'. EsTHEiJ. I^ous aimons, we love! Eleanor. Tu aimes, thou lovest! Sylvia. Nous aimons, Nous aimons, we love! Enter Spoke, Tyre, Hubbe, aiid others of the Bicycle Oluh, m pictur- esque costumes. They have heard the last portion of the preceding. The girls show to each other a coy consciousness of the presence of the men, of whom, however.^ they take no notice, hut turn their hacks, pretending not to see them, and studying. All the Men. T aimer ai, I shall love; Tu aimeras thou shall love; Elle aimera, she shall love ! Nous aimerons, we shall love; Vous aimerez, you shall love; Elles aimeront, they shall love. 'T is pleasure all other above In studj'ing Aimer, to love. Aimons, let us love! Aiynez, love ye! Ensemble. Girls (aside). Such conduct as this nothing less Than pure disrespect we may call; Though, still, 't is but fair to confess That we do not dislike it at all! Men (to girls). J^aime, 1 love; Tu aimes, thou lovest; EUe aiine, she loves; Nous amons, we love; Vous aimez, you love; Us aiment', they love. 18 POUNCE & CO. The men approach the girls, who coquettlshly retreat to the other side and continue stuuyiny. Half of thje Girls. Have you the knife Of the admiral's wife, Or the butter and flute of the tailor? TiiK OTHER Half. I have the gold shoe And the leather corkscrew Of our neighbor, the niece of the sailor! Half of the Girls. Have you the cat, With my grandfather's hat, Or the little green sword of my mother? The Men. I have not this here. And I have not that there ; And I have not the one nor the other! Ensemble. Girls (aside). Such conduct as this nothing less Than pure disrespect we may call. Though, still, 'tis but fair to confess We do not dislike it at all. Men. Xaime, I love, etc. Eleanor. Why have you intruded upon us? Spoke. Can you ask? If we had not intruded, how would it have been possible to speak to you? Electra. You might have written! Eleanor. But what is it that you want to say to us? Spoke, Tyre, and Hubbe (together). That we have long loved you; that you realize the dream of our life. Electra (ecstatically). I the dream of your life. Oh, joy! Spoke (politely). May I request you to remember that we said dream, not nightmare ? Electra (pZacicZZ?/). So you did. Spoke (to Eleanor). Our object in camping was to find an excuse to be near you. Eleanor. But we don't know you. Tyre. We have taken that into consideration, and look upon it in the light of an advantage, for us. Eleanor (dreamily). Perhaps you are right. But without knowing us, how can you love us? Spoke. It is destiny! All we know is, that we love you, and that you must be ours. POUNCE ^: CO. 19 Electra. Say no more! I '11 be yours! Spoke (to Electra). But I did n't ask you. Electra. And are n't you going to? Spoke. It is difficult to foresee what may happen; but, at present,! think it is doubtful. Eleanor.* But who are you? Spoke. I '11 tell you. Spoke. Mex. Spoke. Men. Song and Chorus. We 're the Champion Bicycle Club, That all others in riding can drub. Kot a snap of the thumb Do we care whence they come, We '11 with any or all try a rub ! You may say no good object is won, No particular benefit done, In working one's legs As if stepping on eggs, But that proves you 've no feeling for fun. When the bicycle we are astride We are thrilled by delirious pride. Are we not? We are! Then a cheer! Huzza ! For the glorious steed we ride ! We 're the Champion Bicycle Club^ That all others in riding can drub. Not a snap of the thumb Do we care whence they come ; All others we can drub. Men and Girls. Huzza ! Huzza ! For the Bicycle Club. II. The bicycle goes on its course, And never grows tired, like a horse; Though we own it is true That its riders oft do*. Plus occasional ground for remorse. Of all luxuries under the sun To compare with our sport is there none, For the rider perforce Does the work of the horse. So combines two enjoyments in one ! 20 POUNCE & CO. Men. Spoke Men. Men and Girls. Eleanor (recit). Men (startled). Girls. Men. Eleanor. When the bicycle we are astride We are thrilled by delirious pride. Are we not ? We are ! Then a cheer! Huzza ! , For the glorious steed we ride. We 're the Champion Bicycle Club, And all others in riding can drub. Not a snap of the thumb (s7uip thuiiihs) Do we care whence the}^ come ; All others we can drub ! {Business as before.) Huzza 1 Huzza ! For the Bicycle Club ! That 's very satisfactory ! But we To you can never more than sisters be. What? Cannot marry us? Oh, ag-o-nee I Unsay those words ! We can't. .; Our hearts are broken. 'T is crushing, we admit, but fate has spoken ! Quintet and Chorus {without accompaniment). — Spoke, Hubbe, Tyre, Eleanor, Electka. 'T is but to seek the pages Of history to learn That love has been for ages Opposed by parents stern. But loving as we do love, The poet's words may soothe. Which say, " The course of true love Did never yet run smooth." Though fate be now a blighter, Denying comfort's crumb, Our love may bum the brighter In the happy days to come. Chorus. Our love may burn the brighter In the happy days to come. Spoke. But what is this blighting obstacle that stands between us and the realization of our dearest hopes? Why can we not marry you? Eleanor. Because, in the first place, there is a wealthy English lord in the mill who might choose any one of us at an}- moment; and you must confess that a lord would be a more desirable match than you. POUNCE & CO. 21 Spoke (sadly). Undoubtedly! Far superior to us, we admit — (with reservation) socially! Eleanor. And, in the next place, papa will not consent to our mar- rying any except the workingmen in the mill. Spoke. Ah! a gleam of hope (resolutely). Well, then, we will all become workingmen in the mill. Electra. How sublime! You are worthy of us! Spoke. Yes; and we will go and offer ouicselves at once. Chorus (reprise). We 're the Champion Bicycle Club, And at labor we '11 now tiy a rub. Not a snap of the thumb Do we care whence they come ; All workmen we can drub. Men and Girls. Huzza! Huzza! For the Bicycle Club! Exeunt all themeii, kissing their hands to the girls, who kiss their hands in return; Electra effusiveh . Esther. How noble of them ! Sylvia. How self-sacrificing. Electra. How deliciously devoted ! Eleanor. And all for love! How proud we should be that we have the privilege of being girls. Otherwise we could not have inspired in them this generous determination to do something useful. Love masters all! Electra. I can't say as to that ; but I know he masters me. He has emptied his quiver into this poor little heart until it does nothing itself ])ut quiver. Song. — Electra. What is this love? Ah, well I know. 'T is thinking who will marry you, 'T is dreaming of a grand trousseau; Of wedding gifts ;"his revenue. 'T is waiting for the distant day May make you somebody's for life. 'T is wondering what there is to pay ^ That no one asks you for a wife. Ah! this is love divine. The love known to us all; The love we can't define. Which holds us in its thrall. 22 pouncp: .k: co. Chorus (seraphically). Yes, there is love divine, The love we can't detine. II. What is this love? Ah, well I know. 'T is dreaming he will ever be The same as when he was your beau, And begged your hand on l^ended knee. 'Tis musing sweetly, that if e'er He should see fit to change his course. You need not yield unto despair While there are lawyers and divorce ! Yes, this is love divine, The love known to us all; The love we can't define, Which holds us in its thrall. Chorus. Ah, this is love divine. The love we can't define . Enter Polly, running. Polly. Oh, young ladies, Mr. Pounce has sent me for you ! Eleanor. Of course! He wants us to wait on the work-people again, while they are eating. That is one of his ideas of the union of capital with labor. Polly. And oh! A number of new young men have offered them- selves to work in the mill. Such a splendid lot! Eleanor. Don't speak of them as if they were dry goods! Polly, did papa engage them? Polly. He found out that they knew nothing about spinning silk, and told them he did n't want them. Girls {disconsolately). Oh! Polly. And then they offered handsome premiums to be allowed to come and learn the business, and he took 'em all in. Omnes (pleased). Ah! Polly. And then the other work-people began to scowl and to mut- ter, and there 's trouble brewing. But I don't see why, for, as the 3-oung men know nothing of the business, and get no wages, I don't see how it can hurt anybody. But your pa is waiting for you. Eleanor. Come, girls, let us go at once. Perhaps we can throw oil on the troubled water. POUNCE & CO. 23 Polly. As some of the hands have been drinking, I 'm afraid you '11 have to throw oil on the brandy and water. Chorus. Ko delay then, Let 's away, then, And attempt this fire to smother. Goodness gracious ! How vexatious! First 't is one thing, then another! He his hobby must forsake Or our woes will never end. If, in time, a stitch he 'd take, Things would very quickly mend. Exeunt girls. Polly. This comes of trying to do too much. Pounce & Co. wantea to equalize capital and labor, and now labor wants to equalize Pounce & Co. Equality is a very nice thing in its way, but it does n't seem to work very well. As far as I can make out, it means that nobody is any better than you are; but that you are infinitely better than anybody else! Enter Arthur Dobbins, in workingman' s attire, elegantly and fashion- ably made, with clean and elaborate cuffs and collar, polished high- lows, etc. He is smoking a cigar in a languid way. DoBBixs. Ah! Polly! Why are you not with the rest of the company enjoying yourself? Polly. They do not want me. I am too plebeian for them, because I am not above my station. But I might ask the same question of you, my lord. Dobbins. Excuse me, Polly. I again feel obliged to call attention to the important fact that I am simple Arthur Dobbins here, and I must insist upon your calling me so. Polly {impressing it on her memory). Simple Arthur Dobbins! Dobbins (dryly). Arthur Dobbins will do, Polly. When I entered the mill to learn a trade I dropped my title and my ancestral pride together. Polly. And ever since you have dropped them all the girls are try- ing to pick them up. Dobbins. And are you among themV Polly. Oh! I wouldn't presume to stoo|) to such n thing, Mr. Dob- bhis. 24 POUNCE & CO. Dobbins. Would n't you, really? . I respect you for it. Polly. But how are you going to learn a trade in the way you are going on? You never come near the work-rooms. Dobbins. I am learning how to learn to learn, and that is something you know. Polly. Is there surely no other motive in your coming here? Dobbins. There is another motive, but that is my mystery. You '11 find it out by and by. Polly. But can't I know it now? A mystery is such a luxury! Dobbins. Listen, then. I owe Mr. Pounce a debt of gratitude I can never repay. One night he rescued the nephew of a particular friend of my brother from shame and misery. This nephew had been dining out, and, according to appearances, had imbibed too much of an insidious cup, which he afterwards insisted was lobster salad, — but I have always had my doubts upon that point. However, while under the confusing intiuence of lobster, and while trying with a patent corkscrew to open the coal-hole of his residence, which he doubtless mistook for his front door, Mr. Pounce found him, dragged him up the steps by the coat-collar, rang the bell, and modestly hastened away. That man was the young and noble Marquis of Bogginagar, the nephew, as 1 say, of a particular friend of my brother. I shall never forget it. That is why I am here. The rest is my mystery, which I shall carry to the grave with me, — unless I divulge it before I die. Polly. How remarkable ! Dobbins. You are the only mortal to whom I have breathed a word of this; and you would never have heard it if 1 did not feel toward you a something or other which, so to speak, is, to say the least, very peculiar. Polly {casting down her eyes). Oh, sir! And am I to look upon that in the light of a formal declaration of love? Dobbins. By no means! simple child of nature that you are. Oh, how refreshing you are to me after the gaudy and mocking artifi- cialities of the gilded and heated salons of nobility. You 're a flower of the fields — a daisy! Polly, can a nobleman stoop from his high rank to marry far, far beneath his station? Polly (fervently). He can, he can! Dobbins. Can he bear the reproaches of his caste for the degradation of such an alliance? Polly (ecstatically). Oh, yes! Dobbins (reflectively). I have often thought so in the empty hours of POUNCE & CO. 1^5 iiiy hollow life. And, Polly, do you think you could love such a titled and wealthy waif as I am? Polly (enthusiastically). I know I could. (Buries her face in his bosom.) Dobbins. You are a trifle premature, Polly! (She is about to recede. He checks her and 7'eturns her head to his boso7n.) But — it is not unpleasing to me. Duetto. — Polly and Dobbins. Dobbins. AVould you mind telling me If e'er your heart has fluttered At sight of any he, Or aught he may have uttered? Polly. Xot since I long ago Played house with little AVilly. He was my baby beau, When I was young and silly. Though but a child, And scarce knee high, My heart beat wild When he was nigh, Since then I have not known love's flame Till I met one 1 will not name. Dobbins. Tell me, tell me, is it I? Polly. Pray don't press for a reply. I can't say. Yea or nay ! Ense:mble. Polly. Ask me no more, 1 beg and implore ; For I can't say Or yea, or nay ! Dobbins. I beg and implore, This coyness give o'er. And quickly say Or yea, or nay! Polly. I fully. am aware, 1 've won your admiration; But know I must forbear To look above my station. Dobbixs. a cat may at a king J^ook, if he is inclined to; And you at me may fling A glance, if you 've a mind to. 26 rouNCE & CO. When but a child, And scarce knee high, Your heart beat wild When one was nigh. Since then have you not known love's flameV Polly. Not ere I saw one I '11 not name. Dobbins. Tell me, tell me, is it I? I\)LLY. If you press for a reply I must say, Truly, yea! Ensemble. Polly (aside). Kow it is o'er, I 'm sure that he Will think no more Of poor Pol-lee I Dobbins (aside). I '11 say no more, Until I see If she adore My rank or me ! Dobbins (aside, recitative). Dobbins, reflect upon your high position! That through your veins flows azure blood patrician. Polly (aside). If he were not a lord. Dobbins (fervently). Oh, Polly, say — (checking himself). J3ut see, the girls are coming all this way! Finale. Enter Eleanor, Milicent, Sylvia, Esther, Laura, Olivia, Ipiii- genia, Antigone, Andromache, Medea, Jocasta, and Elec- TRA. They surround Dobbins, eagerly. Girls. At last we have a sight of you! We do not think it right of you, And more, quite impolite of you From us to keep away. Because of your passivity,* A painful inactivity Has marked the whole festivity Of papa's natal day. Can we do anything for youV What is there we can bring for you? An ice, a chicken's wing for you? You only have to say! POUNCE & CO. We '11 get some lemonade for you Or else a marmalade for you, Or something stronger made for you, Without the least delay. Some soda with a stick in it, A cocktail with a kick in it, Your hat, to put a brick in it, Command, and we '11 obey! Polly (aside). Alas! I very plainly see He will not deign to think of me. DoBBiXbi (aside). 'T is very clear to me, A lord's wife each would be. Enter Spoke, Tyre, Hubbe, a7id the rest of the Bicycle Club during last bars of chorus. They gaze in astonishment, and then remon- strate. Spoke, Tyre, and Hubbe. Ah! what is it we behold? Do we here a rival see? Can it be that we are sold? Dreadful thought! It cannot be? (To women.) What means this duplicity? Chorus. — Bicycle Club. Yes; explain what here we see! \Vliat means this duplicity'? Elkanou. What we say or what we do We will not excuse to you. Ensemble. G1RL8. At last we have a sight of you, etc. Bicycle Club. Ahl what is it we behold? etc. Polly. Alas! I very plainly see, etc. Dobbins. 'T is very clear to me, etc. Spoke, Tyre, Hubbe. But, in view of our relations. We insist on explanations, ^yhJ this fellow you caress? Club. Yes, in view of our relations, AVe all ask for explanations. Why this fellow. you caress? Polly, Dobbins. //,^/ (tirls. Fellow! Polly. He to whom you are applying Words ail courtesy defying Is a lord, and nothing less! Men (taking off hats). Ah! can it really be? 28 POUNCE & CO. Men. Dobbins. Girls and Polly (pointing proudly to him). Lord Alfred Peerage, he! Then here we kneel to you, And pardon humbly sue ! (Kneel.) For pardon offer no appeal ; To me there is no need to kneel. My title here is all a flam, 1 only Arthur Dobbins am. Men (contemptuously). What, only Arthur? Dobbins, too? To Arthur Dobbins we '11 not sue. (Theyrise.) J5efore Lord Alfred Peerage we Are willing, though, to bend the knee. Concerted (without accompaniment). Bicycle Club. What, only Arthur? Dobbins too? etc. They frown on Arthur! Dobbins, too! To Arthur Dobbins they '11 not sue! Before or lord, or ] )obbins, we Are quite content to bend the knee. They frown on Arthur! Dobbins too! To Arthur Dobbins they '11 not sue. As either he 's the same to me. To either will I bend the knee. ^' Girls (aside). Polly (aside). Dobbins (aside). They frown on Arthur! Dobbins, too! But will unto Lord Alfred sue. Strange that such difference should be 'Twixt tweedle-dum and tweedle-dee. Enter Pounce, in excitement, folio wed by Crank. Omnes (recit.) Pounce. AVTiat mean this perturbation And agitation? Omnes. Grip. I scarce can find the words to say They 've struck, and on my natal day • A strike I Oh, horror ! Could they not wait until to-morror? Enter Grip and followers, also all the icorlc-people. We have come here for your answer To our very mild demand. Give it quickly as you can , sir. What are we to understand ? Work-people. To our very mild demand What are we to understand ? Pounce. I cannot yield I greatly fear ! Work-people. You cannot yield ? What do we hear ^ POUNCE & CO. 29 POI'XCK. 1 've given all that I can give. If you take more I cannot live. You surely would not like, I know, To see an end to Pounce & Co. (illlV. We know nothing as to that ; We want more money, and that's flat! J\)LLY. Monsters! Girls. Monsters without mercy! Grip. Well, we think it 's vice-versy. Polly Are no hearts within yoii lurking? Dobbins (as ide). Good I my mystery is working! Skstet and Chorus. —Pounce, Dobbins, Spoke, Grip, Polly, Eleanor. Pounce. If I should yield to your demand 'T would utter ruin be; For you the masters would become, The working-people we! Grip. Indeed! then we shall persevere And carry out our will. For we would greatly like to be The owners of the mill! Dobbins. Spoke. Polly 'T is very, very odd to me. And very, very strange! The reason why I cannot see For such unheard-of change. Ah! had he been content to leave These people in their station. He had not then had cause to grieve At such a culmination. Ensemble. Pounce. If I should yield to your demand 'T would utter ruin be; For you the masters would become, The working-people we. Girls. If he should yield to their demand 'T would utter ruin be; For they the masters would become, And but a workman he. Grip. Yes, we would greatly like to be The owners of the mill. 30 I*OUNCE & CO. Dobbins and Spoke. Polly. Eleanor. 'T is very, very odd to me, And very, very strange. The reason why I cannot see For this unheard-of change. Ah! they the masters then would be, And but a workman he. Ah, me! Ah, me! Unhappy we ! Chorus. -Workmen and Bicycle Club. "I* is very plain that we The masters soon will be. Silent Song. — Crank. Crank, in a staie of great excitement^ comes forward and siyigs a song in gesture, as the silent partner. He manifests his discontent with the entire proceedings, shakes his fists at the workmen, and expresses indignation at their course. Chorus. No, no! It is not so. Upon my word. It is absurd. Such awful language I ne'er heard! At end of song Crank strikes his stick on stage, goes up indignantly, and meets the sympathy of the girls. Grip (to Pounce). We wait your answer. What have you to say? You can't refuse upon your natal day. Chorus (argiimentatively). You can't say nay Upon your natal day ! Yes, at this hour, I 'm in their power. Come aid me, fertile brain, I yield to you. Then we'll strike, too. And get all back again. Ah, joy! Chorus. Ah, joy! Pounce (aside). (Ahud.) (Aside.) Grip. Ensemble. Grip and Work-people. We 're masters here, at last, what bliss! We 'd not the least idea of this; The mill is properly our own, For we the money make alone. These girls who e'er on us have frowned, Now kneel before us, on the ground. We '11 sneer and jeer to view them thus, As they have sneered and jeered at us. Dobbins and Spoke, Tyre and Hubbe. I ne'er saw such a move as this; Or fate so queerly go amiss, These dogs will quarrel o'er the bone, And each insist it is his own, But fortune's wheel will turn around, And those who now are on the ground Will to the top rise ominous, To punish all who use them thus. Girls (<»iiu'thing of that comp;inionable kind. 44 POUNCE & CO. Spoke. Never! Because you have made a jolly old idiot of yourself, do you think you have fallen in my estimation? Never! I like you the better for it; for it shows how simple you are. Does n't it, boys? Bicycle Men. It does, it does! PomsrcE. It 's very kind of you, I 'm sure. During this conversation Crank tries to speak, hut is prevented. He then goes to Ritggs and his companions and converses with them volubly, using rax>id gesticulation. They are aghast at his volubil- ity and try to avoid him, but he follows them about. Grip. Excuse me, Spoke, but I'm glad you are here, because I have a few words to say to you. Business in the mill is neglected, owing to your propensity to flirt with the girls. RuGGS and his companions seek safety from Crank's volubility by flight. He follows them off, still gesticulating and conversing. Spoke. But we came here expressly to flirt with the girls, and if we are deprived of that privilege we shall go! Grip. But you cannot go! You have paid a premium to learn the business and must stay. Spoke. True ! I did not think of that. All the bicycle men hang their heads sadly. Re-enter Crank, followliig RXJGGS and companions. Grip. Besides, the girls were betrothed to us long ago. It is true that they are only the daughters of workingmen, and if we marry them we shall stoop beneath our station; but we have no doubt they will appreciate the honor we do them in raising them to our level. Moreover, they don't want us, which is an additional incentive to the course we are resolved upon. RiTGGS and companions. Ah ! (with satisfaciion). Pounce {deeply moved). Come, Crank. I cannot slay. This gener- osity touches me to the heart. It is the realization of my dream, — the union of Capital with Labor. {Takes Crank's arm.) Let us hence. Crank. If I might make a few remarks, T would observe with all due humility — Grip. Silence ! I have before told you — Crank. I know what you 're going to say. You have before told me in that peculiarly eloquent manner of yours that my conversation is apt to be too verbose in comparison with the paucity of the ideas POUNCE & CO. 45 upon which it is so freely and so elaiboratoly expended; but if you take into consideration that I have long been condemned to a taci- turnity wholly revolting to my feelings and still more unjust to my capacity for expressing myself fluently upon all necessary, and, for the matter of that, all unnecessary occasions, you will appreciate my joyous yearning for availing myself of the opportunity afforded me of speaking again. (Oomes to a stop for want of breath.) Pounce. Come, Crank ! Grip. Xo, stay. Pounce. As what 1 have to say is likely to be painful to you, you had better remain and hear it. Pounce. I cannot, I cannot. It is too much for me, — as you have been. (Exit^ dragging Crank.) Grip (feelingly). Poor fellow. He is a strange compound of low cun- ning and the most unblemished dishonesty. But as for you. Spoke, and your rebellious companions, I have only to say that you had better bear in mind what I have said to you. You will find it to your advantage. Exeunt Grip and followers with stately dignity, Spoke and the others snapping their thumbs under their noses till they are off. Spoke. J^ow, what is to be done ! Oh, what agony it is to be a baffled man, and we are all baffled men! Omxes. Alas, yes ! Spoke. Here are we bound to this delusive mill by the premiums we have paid ! Is there no way out of it ? Perhaps, too, dreadful consideration ! we shall be robbed of the girls we love, and who love us devotedly, — or will as soon as Lord Dobbins has made his choice. But they shall j'et be ours ! Ai'e we resolved? Omxes (decidedly). We are ! Enter girls. They express delight upon seeing their lovers, and are going to them, but suddenly recollect themselves and draw back. Spoke. AMiy do you shrink from us ? Electra. I, oh I did not shrink ! ^_^ Eeeanor. We shrink from you because we are work-girls, — because we cannot now link ourselves indissolubly with one, — or perhaps I should say, several, — who will blush for us. Spoke. But the man who can blush is not wholly lost to shame ! Hear me ! We love you still ! Electra (with a deep sigh). Ah ! I live again ! Spoke. You maybe poor, humble, unworthy of us, but we live for you alone. (To bicyclers.) I believe I express the general sentiment. 46 POUNCE & CO. All the Men (approvingly). Exactly I Eleanor. You are all rich, it is true, and we sliould want for noth- ing ; that is a great inducement, certainly ; but though poor now, we still cherish the hopes we had in our brighter days, and dream that Lord Alfred may choose one of us. Electra. Alas, yes! Eleanor. If it were not for that we shomld not hesitate a moment. Electra. I 'm sure I should not. Spoke. I will speak to him this very day about it, and if he in a man he will make up his mind at once. Electra. Thanks, oh thanks! Enter Dobbins. The girls all sigh as they see him, and then cast down their eyes with humility. Spoke. Excuse me for what I am about to say, but I am compelled to the course I am taking. To come to the point at once ; you do not deny that you are a lord. Dobbins. I do not. I am a lord with a mystery. Spoke. You have known a mother's care! Dobbins. Born at a period of my existence when self-care was wholly out of the question, I was thrown early upon a mother's attentions. Ah! unhappy they who have not had a mother! Spoke. Under those circumstances it is of course imperative upoji you to marry. (All the girls interested; Electra pushing others hack.) Dobbins. There have been numerous marriages in our family since it first originated. I presume I shall follow in the beaten path. I'll tell you of one marriage that was rather remarkable. Pay attention. Song. — Dobbins. A brother-in-law weds his sister-in-law, Who the first cousin is of his mother, The niece of his step-father's aunt, and the son Of kis grandfather's oldest twin brothev. Now, tell me, I pray, Without any delay, " Wliat relation each bore to the other. Ghortts (int&rrogatively). A brother-in-law? Dobbins (affirmatively), A brother-in-law! Chorus (as before). Weds his sister-in-law? Dobbins (as before). Weds his sister-in-law. POUNCE & CO. 47 Cnor.i's. Who, the first cousm is, of his brother V We frankly confess We 're unable to guess The relation each bore to the other. Dobbins. 1 11 tell you ! II. She is daughter-in-law of her mother-in-law, And he is his sister's own brother, And as they are married 't is plain to be seen They are husband and wife to each other. 'Tis as plain as can be. And I hope you now see . What relation each bore to the other. Chorus (reflectively). She is daughter-in-law? Dobbins. She is daughter-in-law. Chorus. To her mother-in-law? Dobbins. To her mother-in-law. Chorus. And he is his sister's own brother? (Laughing.) How stupid that we From the first difl not see They were husband and wife to each other ! Enter Grip. He starts on seevig girls. Grip. Ah! I thought so. Since there is no other way of controlling the mill and keeping the men and women apart, I have resolved that the girls shall henceforth work up-stairs. In the prospect that the firm may possibly marry them their hearts must be kept dis- engaged. Electra. Marry us! Oh, you dear soul! ( Falls on Grip's neck.) Grip. Enough of this (disengaging himself). You flirt with these bicycle people constantly. I shall discharge them all! Spoke. Ha, ha! Discharge us! You cannot. As you have admitted in the presence of reliable witnesses, we have paid a premium to learn the lousiness and cannot go until we have learned it. And, as we never intend to learn it, we shall stay here forever! Grip. Baffled! Maledictions! But one thing I can do, and that is to send the girls up-stairs. So go! At once! (Sends girls off, chasing them like chickens. The girls kiss their hands to men as they de- part, Grip trying to prevent them.) Spoke (indignantly). I cannot find words sufficiently strong to stig- matize this comparatively ungentlemanly behavior. I — I — 48 POUNCE & CO. Dobbins. Not a word ! My mystery is working. Say nothing, but watch. You, too, are a part of my mystery. Silence, and obey me. (Looks sternly at them.) The eye of the nobility is on you. As it is superior to other eyes you will succumb to its influence, of course ! Let us go ; and in order that our confidences to each other, if overheard, may not be understood, we will seek safety in a foreign tongue. Chorus {with fingers on lips). Mysterioso, Non strepitoso; E whisperoso, ^ ,, Silenzio ! Ever fearing, Some one hearing, Silenzio 1 Exit D0BBIH8, followed mysteriously by all except Spoke. Spoke. Why, ah, why, should I strepitoso at the bidding of any proud lord when my heart pants for my E\eanor? Song. I. No love have I e'er known Save that for you I own. As far as I recall One, very likely two, I may have gone to woo, But, at the most, that 's all. But unto you Will I be true Forever and forever ! II. Come, love, into the shrine Within this heart of mine, ' I give you for your own. x" You '11 find it rather small. But don't mind that at all, For you '11 be quite alone. And true to me I 'm sure you '11 be Forever and forever ! Eleanor creeps down stairs cautiously. Eleanor. Hist I Hist ! POUNCE & CO. 49 Spoke. Ah ! ray Eleanor ! Eleanor. Softly, or we shall be overheard by that dreadful Grip. What is to be done? Spoke. You are ! Eleanor. What do you mean? Spoke. That Grip and his fellows are to marry you and the girls. Eleanor. Never ! What do they take us for? Spoke. For wives, I suppose. Eleanor. Don't be silly, I beg ! Oh dear, dear I This all comes of papa's ridiculous ideas of equality. 1 hope he is satisfied at last ! Heigho ! I wish I were a protoplasm. Spoke. Don't wish that, beloved. If you were, what would become of me? Eleanor. True ! It was selfish in me, I admit. Duet. — Eleanor and Spoke. Eleanor. Oh, could but I Take wings and fly Up to the sky. There would I stay Till you that way Could speed to meet me. Say, would you come And with me roam The azure dome, And full of glee And ecstasy, Make haste to greet me? Spoke. Could you but fly Up to the sky, I 'm sure that I, Without delay. Would haste "away To come and greet you. Be't understood. That is, I would In case I could. And I had, too, Wings just lik-e you, With which to meet you. For you must own, With wings alone Have any flown Particularly high Into the sky. 50 POUNCE & CO. Ensemble. What joy to float Upon the air In case the weather should be fair, For should it rain You must admit We should, of joj-, Have not a bit. E7iter Grip. Grip. What? Again? Rebellion? (Separating them.) Enough of this ! Eleanor. Oh, no! Not half enough. Grip. Away with you! Embracing each other before my very eyes! Spoke. How could I know you were looking? Eleanor. And if it was unpleasing to you, why did you look at all? Grip. Not a word. Up stairs with you! Eleanor exits up stairs, kissing her hand to Spoke. Grip. And as for you — • Enter Crank, precipitately. Crank. Mr. Grip, I have a few important words to say, which will not take up more than half an hour of your valuable — ExitGBiP hastily , followed by Crank. Spoke. Parted again. Heigho! Ah! {Sees telephone.) A telephone! She is in the room above! Ha, ha! Grip, the unrelenting Grip, is circumvented! {Goes to telephone.) Duet. — Spoke and Eleanor. ^^0^^ (rings bell of telephone). Hello! Hello! Who is it? I can't hear! Hello! hello! Is that you, Nellie, dear? Hello! Eleanor (outside). Hello! Sfok^ (at telepho7ie). Ah! my heart is wholly thine! Tell me, dost on me bestow ' ' ' An affection like to mine, Speaking naught but calm, — '* Hello! *' Tell me, dost thou wish me near, As in the lovely short ago. When thy first kiss, — " Hello ! " — so dear, Filled me wholly with — ' ' Hello I ' ' POUNCE & CO. 51 Eleanor (outside). Together. If thy heart its faith retain, Teil me, darling, tell me so ; And relieve me of the pain That now makes Tne all — " Hello ^ " II. Yes, I love thee with a love That a change can never know ; And I prize thee far above All the riches of — "Hello!" Ah! beloved, when thou 'rt near I with joy am all aglow ; When away from thee I hear Nothing but thy soft— '^ Hello! " O! thou loving heart of mine. But one wish— " Hello! " — I know: To be thine, and only thine, In the sweet, sweet — "Hello! " Thou 'rt mine! I'm thine. Hello! Now go! Last call! That 's all. Enter Polly, hastt Polly. Mr. Dobbins wants you and the girls to meet him here at once. Spoke. What is the matter? Is the mill on fire? Polly. No; but I think it is going to be. He says he is going to ex- plode his mystery at once; and I suppose that means something terrible. So go, please, and find the young ladies and tell them to come down. Spoke. Anything to oblige you {aside) and to see the adored unap- proachable. Polly. Ah! I shall soon know Arthur Dobbins's mystery that he has guarded so carefully. I wonder if he has the slightest sus- picion of mine? Song. Loving doubtless is^a pleasure. Though the heart it sting! It is sweet unrest to treasure, And that sort of thing. But still, to undergo This most ecstatic woe. Unless you chance to know 52 POUNCE & CO. He suffers too, As well as you, Upon my word. Seems quite absurd! Yet — the fact 1 can't disclaim — We do it all the same! Why, if you love, delay so. And cause me to bewray so? When you might kindly say so, And till my life with joy Without alloy! II. If men feel the tender passion They may speak outright; But poor we are placed by fashion In another light. To speak we must forbear; To hint we may not dare ; No heed how we despair We must be mum Until they come And condescend Suspense to end! So I have to wait and wait To learn from him my fate ! Why, if you love, delay so, //.Ui« V And cause me to bewray so? • s > When you might kindly say so, ; i . ^ 1/ .: . ;,|, , ;-* And fill my life with joy , ci Without alloy! -^ '<q POUNCE & CO. 53 1 Dobbins. I have already observed it, but I thank you for the informa- tion all the same. What I have to say to you must not be sus- pected. In order to mislead attention in case we are interrupted you will oblige me by simulating the raptures of terpsichorean joy. In other words, dance! Quintette and Chorus. —Polly, Eleanor, Electra, Dobbins, Spoke. Dobbins. {To girls.) {To men.) I 've no time with words to parry, So at once ahead I '11 drive. You these gentlemen would marry; With these ladies you would wive. Spoke. You the truth present compactly; That is clear, beyond a doubt; But I cannot see, exactly. How you chanced to find it out I All. Yes, j ^^^^ \ cannot see exactly How - J^^ y chanced to find it out. Eleanor. Since the subject thus you mention, May we ask if you will tell If you have the le'ast intention To assist our love, as well? All. Yes, have you the least intention To assist ] *^^^!^ llove, aswelP Dobbins. That depends on circumstances And on what to me you say. Electra. We -re prepared for all advances You may make us in that way. All. We 're prepared for all advances You may make us in that way. Polly. If you 've any proposition Pointing matrimonially, They with instant expedition With its mandates will comply. All. We 're prepared with expedition With its mandates to comply. Dobbins. Very well, gentlemen ; make your choice. Select your wives. Men {bowing resiyectfully). After you, my lord. 54 POUNCE & CO. All the girls come forward and surround Dobbins with an air of anx- ious resignation, Electra obtrusive. Dobbins. Though 1 feel deeply the honor done me by these fair maidens,! am obliged, in justice to the sentiments with which they inspire me, to confess that I do not want any of them. The girls all sigh with relief, except Electra, who looks hurt. Eleanor. WeU, that suspense is over, and we are free ! But bless me ! We can't marry them, after all. Papa promised us first to the others, and they now claim us. Dobbins. Were not the terms of the contract that you were to marry workmen ! Girls (sadly). Yes, yes ! Dobbins. Very well, then. Those who claim you are not workmen, but employers. Girls (eagerly). Yes, yes ! Dobbins (triumphantly). Then you can not be theirs ! Omnes. Saved ! saved ! (They all kneel at the feet o/ Dobbins.) Dobbins (benignantly). Else ! this gratitude moves me. The eye of the nobility is dim with emotion. Rise and choose. Spoke chooses Eleanor; Hubbe Esther, Tyre Sylvia, and the others the remaining girls ; Electra being left alone. Electra. But where is mine f Am I to have none ? I suppose I il have to accept you. Dobbins. No, no ! I am going to give the nobility a new sensation by marrying beneath my station, so I choose the unspoiled Polly, who never forgot hers. Omnes. Polly Chromo ! Electra (spitefully). A chromo given with every lord I Quintette (reprise). Omnes. To this welcome proposition. Pointing matrimonially. All with instant expedition With its mandates will comply. Enter Grip, Ruggs, Tuggs, Muggs, Sluggs, and work-people, followed by Pounce and Crank. Grip. Ah, dancing. Enjoying yourselves instead of working. What does it mean? POUNCE & CO. 55 Crank. As it seems to me, I would suggest — Grip. Silence ! Are you revolting? Dobbins. No! It is you who are revolting. Crank. Eminently so! Dobbins. This has gone far enough. I had a mystery; hear me divulge it. Crank. I am attentive. Let the rest retire. Dobbins. No! it is for all to hear. The folly of Pounce & Co. needed a lesson. Crank. Excuse me ; Pounce may have needed one, but the Co., my humble self, stood in no need of — Dobbins. One moment, Mr. Crank. Crank. Make it short, then, and give somebody else a chance to speak. I have a flow of eloquence on the tip of my tongue, which — Dobbins. Let it remain there for the present, Mr. Crank, if you please. Pounce & Co. needed a lesson ; I had a debt of gratitude to repay and that lesson to teach. Both are accomplished. Crank. Are you through? Dobbins. Not yet. Now listen. I have consulted an eminent lawyer. Crank. Now, if there 's anything I admire it 's an eminent lawyer. The law, from my point of view, is one of the prof oundest — Dobbins (remonstrating). Pray, Mr. Crank — Crank. I don't feel like praying ; I want to talk. Dobbins (to Grip). From this eminent lawyer I have learned that, as you have no written agreement with Pounce & Co. , they are still owners of the mill and you are liable to damages for a large amount for obtaining property under false pretences. Crank. I am struck speechless. Spoke. I wish you were. Dobbins. But no legal action will be taken if you return to your places as workmen, — without the delicacies of the season. (To Pounce.) You are again Pounce & Co. You have, I trust, learned your lesson. I have no longer a mystery. Y"ou once did a service to the nephew of a particular friend of mine. Lobster salad. I came here to pay that debt. I will also pay the debts of the firm. Bless you! I am no longer Arthur Dobbins, but Lord Alfred Peerage. Grip. Down-trodden work-people again! It is the chance of war. I can now complain again, — and suffer. Polly. As you ought to do, you abandoned man. 56 POUNCE & CO. Electra. No! not aha,ndoned {throws herself on his neck). I'll com- fort you; I '11 never leave you. Grip {aghast). What? Dobbins. Hold! The lady's marked attentions to you have made you liable to a suit for breach of promise, which will ruin you. Take her, and no more striking. Electra. Have no fear. Henceforth I '11 do all the striking. aPouNCE. And we are masters again. Crank. Huzza! I — 3P0UNCE. Excuse me, Crank. You are once more a silent partner. Thank goodness for that. (Crank resumes his former taciturn manner.) From what I see, the girls have paired off. Well, I give my consent. You give yours, of course, Crank (Crank re- mains silent). Ah! silence gives consent. Finale. All our troubles now are ended ; All is as it was before ; And the broken firm is mended, As we hope, to break no more 'T is not perfect, but we never Find that anything is so; But 'tis moved by good endeavor; So, success to Pounce & Co. Curtain. ini .^fe^ CD I WEBER MANUFACTURER OP aRJLND, SQTJA.RE ^JSTJD JJjPRiaJSTS FIAND-FDRTES. For Pure and Sympathetic Tone, coupled with Greatest Power, the *' Weber" has no equal. "w.a.p=i:k]ifloo]v:^-> : Fifth Avenue and West Sixteenth Street, NE^A^ YORK. OI-.I"VE^^ nDiTsoosr cSc co. Washington Street -----. BOSTON. 280 & 2S2 Wabash Ave. CHICAGO. eAYLORD BROS. I,k. Syracuse, N. Y. i StocttoB, C.W. ML50.W64.P6 C037551039 U.C, BERKELEY LIBRARIES CD37SS1D3T DATE DUE Music Library University of California at Berkeley