THE COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S N'T BOOK UC-NRLF BYG.RE.(A.B.) A SYMPATHIZER Digitized by tiie Internet Archive in 2007 witii funding from IVIicrosoft Corporation 'np://www.archive.org/details/collegefreshdontOOevanrich HELPFUL DONTS T"" COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK IN THE INTERESTS of FRESHMEN atlARGE ESPECIALLY THOSE WHOSE REMAINING AT LARGE UNINSTRUCTED * UNGUIDED APPEARS A WORRY and a MENACE to COLLEGE * UNIVERSITY SOCIETY THESE REMARKS AND HINTS ARE SET FORTH BY G. F. E. (A. B.) A SYMPATHIZER THE ILLUSTRATIONS BY CHARLES FRANK INGERSON THE DECORATIONS * INITIALS BY RAYMOND CARTER PAUL ELDER ^^^ COMPANY PUBLISHERS : : : SAN FRANCISCO TO H. H. C TOGETHER WE WERE SMALL FROGS IN THAT GREAT ACADEMIC PUDDLE THE OLDEST IN OUR LAND AND IN MEMORY OF THE POLLIWOG STAGE I DEDICATE TO YOU THIS PLUNGE Copyright, 1910 by Paul Elder and Company San Francisco C \^' CONTENTS Pase As to the Place 1 As to Settling Down 3 As to Dress 11 As to Dining 15 As to Ledtures and Studies 18 As to College Organizations and Friends . 26 As to Things in General 32 ILLUSTRATIONS Helpful Don'ts, Frontispiece ^^** The weather is generally the only thing about a College Town not yet educated 2 Don't overdo the decoration of your room . Don't dress too sporty , Don't monopolize the conversation at the table Don't iail to keep in mind the steps of descent Don't answer back if the Coach speaks harshly; to you 28 Don't pawn your watch during your first year . . 34 I I I ' »»— I I I I I . ■! I ' l 1 1 I— i^T J—JMn' T»^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN*S DON'T BOOk AS TO THE PLACE ONT imagine that the 1 /^ 11 COLLEGE you own the LoUege town Townirom the mo- ment you ^rike it. Remember, there are prior claims, and you're not the first squatter. Don 't expedt the College Town to furnish you with good weather; because it won't. The weather is generally the only thing about a College Town not yet educated. Of course, if you happen to have come from Laplcind or Patago- nia, and do not know what good weather is, the weather here may suit you. The olde^ inhabitants in a College Town live to be very old ; this is to be accounted for by the f adl that they are kept ITS WEATHER t»^ COLLfcGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK alive by their curiosity to see what kind of weather is going to develop next. COLLEGE Don't forget that sight-seeing SIGHTS j-elatives and others coming on a visit to the College, must see the Library, the Gymnasium, the Dining Hall, and the Athletic Field. These, and the Campus, are generally all the sights there are. It is well to get this li^ care- fully in mind earlyy as it saves you from a panic at the la^ min- ute. You often think that you will explore the place and get something new to show people; but this you never do. The above li^ is a fairly accurate one, and it suffices. Those whom you are guiding about always pretend they are dreadfully intere^ed and excited about every thing in turn. On your fir^ trip as official guide, you yourself see a great deal ; on your fiftieth, you try not to. THE WEATHER IS GENERALLY THE ONLY THING ABOUT A COLLEGE TOWN NOT YET EDUCATED •^ a rrrTJ* T"E COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S DONT BOOK AS TO SETTLING DOWN ONT think that your ^f^^, mere arrival at Col- lege has made you able to relieve Atlas in holding up the ^ World.TheWorld*s idea of you at this point is, that you're something like a gold-fish ju^ let loose in a glass globe. It will begin to expeEl something of you when you're dumped into the big Ocean. Dont, if you can possibly side- ^our^^^ ^ep it, begin to live in a place which you do not like. Thei3/ae- Willies may lurk in the comers. Many a Freshman changes his residence about the mid-year, be- cause he has not made a care- ful seledion at fir^. The moving YOUR LANDLADY T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK often entails cracked wash-bowls, broken pidlures and ca^s, rifled oaths, and a sense of great unrest not appropriate to the season. Don't treat your Landlady shabbily if you happen to live in a private house. Some Land- ladies are the be^ souls in the world. All of them are proud and descended from the best early families (you have only to take their word for this). Though they are often inquisitive, their inquisitiveness often comes from their genuine intere^ in you. Sometimes, the more they k^oto of your family hi^ory, the less they will charge you for oil and gas, at the end of the month. Dont begin too early in the term to make your Landlady's house a noisy abode. She may get impatient and do something ha^, such as even demanding your key, payment and evacua- HER RIGHTS T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK tion. In such an event you see the full meaning of her appella- tion. Whereas, before you may have thought that the word "land" in her title meant to catch, as to land a fish, you now see that it is primarily derived from her ability to come down hard on a special occasion. Dont be discouraged if you dusting can't find anything in the right ^-^^ place after the dusting lady has put things in order. It's a way they have. Dont neglecft ta^e in your ^^ room. How do you know but that somebody may judge you by the way you decorate your study? Presumably, you were not raised in a bam, and there can be no harm in letting the appearance of your room becur out this as facfl. Dont try to make a royal rest- ^^^ dence of your room. Your ta^e A WORD ABOUT T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK may alter. A College man's ta^e often undergoes rapid and violent revolution for the better^ within the fir^ yecuf. Don 't think that you mu^have RUGS Turkish rugs. Generally, a Fresh- man cannot tell the real article when he sees it. The man at the sale may try to make you believe they'll never wear out. Never mind. You have only to get them to know what he means. Ju^ get some old, reliable pat- terns. There is a secret connedted with this. The older and dirtier they get, the more Oriental they look. You've no idea how much sweeping this saves. Bw?!^ ^0^'' go in for a lot of fine BRAc china, the fir^ term. How can you tell but that your neighbors or visitors may not care as much for that sort of thing as you? Remember, that in a room where costly china lies about in pro- T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK fusion, a "rough-house'* may be a more expensive variety of en- tertainment than Grand Opera with seats for the family. Don't get angry if a Senior ^cgra- comes into your room and looks ^^^^ about and smiles. Probably, he's only remembering that he once decorated his room the way you now do yours. Just ^eep your eyes open when you go into older fellows' rooms. You '11 soon learn that two crossed college flags, a vile placer copy of the Venus de Milo, and a copy of the Barye Lion as sole decorations may be lived down, — or later pulled down. If you wish to be excep- tionally original, don't go in for either the flags or thecals. Yet, in following years, these things may become good old friends to re- mind you that you were once a Freshman. about Don't overdo with respec5t to FURNI- TURE T»^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK furniture, even if you can aflFord it; it may make some of your visitors uncomfortable. If you can't afford it, you'll be made uncomfortable yourself. COLLEGE ^^^ ' mi^ake the color of your COLOR College. A good many Fresh- men do this; — it is especially pathetic, by the way, to see a Freshman waving a flag which is off-color at a big game. Some- times the mi^ake is attributed to color-blindness. This is a char- itable interpretation. ''that Dont buy a roll-top desk or ^^Sk ^^ ^^^^ ^^^^ during your fir^ year. You know, you may not care to occupy one room all through College. We heard of one house having to be torn down, that a Freshman might move out with his roll-top desk. Not only this, but when he failed to find another place, a house had to be built up around his cumbersome 8 DON T OVERDO THE DECORATION OF YOUR ROOM T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK furniture. It was a case of this or his rooming in the desk* Don 'ahinkthatyouhavefairly g^^^^ got on to things while the tray of you trunk is ^ill unpacked. Don't look too sober if hazing J^q^ happens to be in vogue, and the Sophomores order you about. Remember that you can make the affair either a funeral or a farce; and it's pleasanter to be the leading man in a farce than to be the principal at a funeral. The be^ way to get along with Sophomores is to take them good-naturedly. Don't be nause- atingly saccharine, for that's just about as bad as getting mad about it. Ju^ fool them into think- ing you're enjoying yourself, and they'll ^op. Don't negled: to receive your ^^^ visitors as if you were glad to ^^^Srs^ see them. This is not encourag- ing hypocrisy, inasmuch as the T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK recommendation need not include the laundryman or the tailor's collec5tor. You couldn't fool them^ anyway. It is not polite, when visitors come, always to be found with a green shade over your eyes. When a visitor calls, look as if you had ju^ been waiting for some one to talk to. If you improve your time between visit- ors, they ought not to cause you to wa^e any valuable time. T^pm^ Dont play the piano at all ^^^ hours. Have a regular time for practice; then your neighbors may protect themselves. If you play the violin or the trumpet, dont overdo it; you are tempting Fate. PROCTOR Dont incur the anger of your Prodtor by noisy condudl or disrespedt. Prodlors — especially young ones — are apt to feel their oats and to report you on slight provocation. But a friendly Proc- tor is a friend worth having. to T"E COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S DON'T BOOK AS TO DRESS i^^E^ON'T wear your Prep- vAHsrr.^ school hat-band, or school ^1 T f • 1 FASHIONS Hash your High- school Fraternity pin upon your al- mo^ manly che^. These are ^ock idiosyncrasies of the Freshman. Ju^ remember that School fashions do not prevail at College. Don't dress too "sporty," dur- -"^rty- ing the fir^ term. The effedts *^«esser you try to imitate at this period of the game are apt to be only the superficial and amusing ones. Don't wear Zong^ hair. Hair, if word^^ left to grow as it li^eth, may longhair attain to a surprising length with- in a single season. The Fresh- man year is not the time to te^ il T"E COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK the accuracy of this ^atement. Wait till you are a Sophomore ; then you won't care to. Remem- ber that long hair is the Poet 5 privilege (though no/always proof of a Poet). To wear long hair, you had better take out a Poet's license. In this respedl a dog- license will do if you fail to qualify as Poet. aSS^siS Don't feel it incumbent upon you to wear a beard or a mousr tachcy if you happen to have raised one on the farm or in England, during the summer. Whiskers are the plus sign of mas- culinity. Upper-classmen do not appreciate them in Freshmen. ^^ Don 't wear too much jewelry ; SPARKLERS g^g ^j^ oveT-Qmount of it sugge^ trips to places where they loan money. ORNA^ Don't affedt ^ick-pins bear- MENTs jj^g large horses' heads or horse- shoes, thinking these will de- DONT DRESS TOO SPORTY T»^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK mon^ate that you ^eep a gig. The horsy ornament connotes the coachman's white tie and the odor of the stable. Dont carry a cane in your ™J^ Freshman year; something is very likely to happen to it. Dont be found displaying a ^J^ tall hat. A tall hat is a mighty "at nice thing for Si^er*s wedding at home; but better leave it there. Its dignity is liable to fade, like the glory that was Greece and the grandeur that was Rome. It was only because those nations got too chesty^ you remember, that the Vandals of old worried them. Don't think that crazy or odd ^^^ clothes £ure necessarily "College" ^[J^es clothes. Lots of College men do wear crazy clothes; but it isn't so much because they're College men, as because they're crazy. Don '/forget to dress neatly and ^^^ up to your means. You owe it is T»^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK to yourself to dress as well as you can. I don't mean that owing this to i/ourse//* should ne- cessitate your continually owing something to your /a//or. You do not owe it to yourself to owe any" body. 14 T«E COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S DONT BOOK AS TO DINING gONT begin by re- vour^ sorting habitually to place the Quick Lunch. Nobody ever made friends at a Quick Lunch, except with the waitresses. Seledt a good place where there are lots of fel- lows whom you will see con- tinually. You ought to pick out some good friends from among them. Dont attempt, in a large din- ^JI^^ble ing hall, to get a place at a society, club, or athletic table for which you have not yet qualified. You are liable to queer yourself from the ^art. Dont try continually to air the ijf^g^ sum of knowledge which you are 15 LOCAL EGOTISM T^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK ju^ assimilating. There are few things more pathetic than the fir^-year chemi^ who keeps ask- ing you at table to "pass the Na CI,** or the fledgling psycholo- gic who would try to prove that bread-and-butter is matter for the mind and not for the stomach. Don 't keep telling how they do things in that part of the country which you come from. The as- sumption is, that since you came to College, you are willing to leam something of how they do things here. Dont monopolize the conversa- tion at the table, especially if there are older men around. You*ll get yourself snubbed if you talk too much about yourself. Fellows don*t care much whether your grandfather kept a brake and ten horses, or drove a "shay** over the plank-road. Be a good liCener. Then, too, older men 16 USTENING TOOTHERS DONT MONOPOLIZE THE CONVERSATION AT THE TABLE T»E COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK like to be likened to. The chances are you will learn a sight more by hearing them than they will by hearing you. Dont continually find fault ^^^^ with the things you have to eat. Adl as if you were used to eating away from home. Half the time the jokes you make at the ex- pense of the food come merely from an uncontrollable desire to air your wit. "Knocking the grub" doesn't require half so much brains or individuality as shutting up about it. 17 T»^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK AS TO LECTURES AND STUDIES ATTEND- ANCE AT LECTURES CHOOSING COURSES "SNAP" COURSES ELECTIVE SYSTEM ONT forget to at- tend a large per cent of your lecflures. The information dispensed in lec- tures is often to be found invaluable in passing the Examinations. Don't let yourself be mesmer- ized into taking a lot of things you feel a positive disinclination for. Many a Freshman has spoil- ed his fir^ year in this way ; and, failing to pass, has left College and become a ^reet-car con- ductor or a clerk. ' Don't mi^ake the willingness to accept a "snap" course for a startling aptitude for a subjedl. Don 't abuse the EleSive System 18 T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK if you are privileged to be at a College where it is employed. It is a sy^em which presupposes your own interest in your intel- leSlual welfare. It is too easy to fill up with a lot of unrelated subjects. You may say, "But I desire a broad education/* Very good. Did you ever go to a circus? There the prettied feats are performed upon the broad, spacious back of one horse. The rider gets the broader-backed critter he can find that will keep moving. Those who ride two and three horses take a risk* In Col- lege you may find that when you try to do the intelleElaal split, you're liable to to fall down be- tween your horses. DonU negledl any hone^ op- jJi^^ portunities you may have to make ^^^^ friends with an Instrudtor or a Pro- fessor. Meeting Teachers repre- sents a privilege and not always 19 T^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^ PONT BOOK necessarily a pull. As for know- ing Professors intimately, few do, except other Professors. As for their knowing us intimately, it might seem as if this seldom happens, until it comes time to expel us. ^^^^c Don'/ try to fool the College Docflor into believing that you can't go to ledlures, or are going to die, because you've sprained your left thumb. Generally, the College Dodtor is a shrewd man, or he w^ould not be the College DocSor. READING required reading in any course. And do some of it — say, a little more than will enable you merely to pass the Exam. It is barely pos- sible that the reading you have done in connecftion with your Col- lege courses will some day prove you an educated man. As for do- ing all the reading that all the 20 T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK Professors require — well, a fellow must sleep and eat Dont think that £;cam5can be J^^^ passed without any preparation, exams It takes some. The minimum has not yet been determined ; nor has the maximum. The middlemum has even been known to vary, according as the in^rucftor imag- ines that the crowd is or is not teJdng the course as a snap. The little birdies are surely in league with the Faculty. Don't rely upon special tutors 'ntcl- to pass all your courses. It's lazy narcotics and not entirely self-respedling. When our friend Gulliver went to Laputa, he met certain Teach- ers who gave their pupils small intelledtual wafers. These they swallowed upon empty stomachs. As the wafers dige^ed, the tinc- ture mounted to the pupil's brain, bearing the proposition along with it. Thesamesy^emof cram- T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK ming exi^ today; only it doesn't always work as advertised. A fel- low resorts to special tutors when he has lo^ confidence, and needs an intelleSual narcotic. Special tutors represent the drug-capsule of learning. Why be a dope- fiend? ^JJJI Don't try in your Exams to make a hit by writing long papers. The Exam is not an en- durance conte^. Somehow, long papers don't take, unless there is some sense in everything you have written. If you don't believe this, try it and find out. Don't rely wholly upon ft/pe- '^^^TOM^ uJnY/en notes to get through your courses. Many College Professors show no quarter to those whom they ascertain to be addidled to this predige^ed form of informa- tion. Often the Professor's life- specialty is the tracing of literary works to their sources ; so be care- 22 PREDI- GESTED T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK ful. Better take notes in ledtures ; if this serve no other purpose, 'twill keep you awake. Don 't put off that long piece of ^ijlj^^ written work till the night before it is due. A piece of work about which you have been warned months beforehand, can't be done between 8 p. m. and 3 a. m. Here ''rush orders/' contrary to the rule, spoil. If you come up to the scratch as you should, in the matter of long pieces of writ- ten work, the Instrudlor will al- mo^ forget how dog-goned lazy you have been all along in the little things. Dont idle away time to such "^^^ an extent that you get a reputa- tion as an idler, either among your friends, or with the mem- bers of the Faculty. You'll find such a reputation hard to live down. Notwith^anding the fadt that everybody is supposed to 23 T»^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK come by a love of Learning in College, there are some things which the Faculty will not take for granted. With the Faculty, the chronic idler will find that his name is anathema, or Dennis at lea^. descSJt Don't fail to keep in mind the AVERNus flight of ^eps which represents the descent from the plane of regular work. It goes something like this: work, slack work, pro- bation, special probation, then, " I am sorry to inform you that the Faculty has decided that you are no longer needed to ornament the College,** etc. After which, it is the greased-slide, down and out, so to speak. In other words, you are about to feel the thrill of Aca- demic life along your keel for the la^ time. Facilis descensus Avemi: Avemus being the cold, cold world, and the bother of having to explain to one's rela- — DONT FAIL TO KEEP IN MIND THE STEPS OF DESCENT T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK tions and friends in the home town how it all happened. Don V show disrespect or con- ™^ge tempt for the College Dean, or ofrce for the retinue within his gates. Once you "queer*' yourself with the College Office, you are on dangerous footing, and the Col- lege Degree you seek is no longer seen to be "con^ant as the north- ern star.** Keep the Degree in mind; hitch your Wagon to it. But don't get too ambitious in the way of Degrees. We once heard of a fellow who was called up and given the Third Degree by the Faculty, without ever being grad- uated. 25 T"E COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S DONT BOOK AS TO COLLEGE ORGANIZATIONS AND FRIENDS ONT hesitate to go out for any teams or papers or musi- cal clubs which you think you'd like to J make. The mere iW^^g /<^^ things shows you're not a dead one. If you are good enough, you'll find these things mean more than you ever had thought they could; if you fail to make them, you'll never re- gret having tried. As you grow older, you will see that you never could have done certain things you thought you could, and you '11 have a fir^-rate opin- ion of your former self and your SORTING ambition. Don't be surprised or disap- OUT YOUR INTERESTS 26 T"E COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK pointed, if you find you have neither time nor inclination to keep up with everything you thought you would, when fir^ coming to College. Your in- tere^ naturally needed a sorting out. Dont think that offering sug- ^Srxo^ ge^ons to an athletic Coach is 5?^'^ the way to mal^e a team. And don't answer back if the Coach speaks harshly to you ; be thank- ful for any of his attention, even if it be gruff. With some Coaches, swearing is more than a liberal art ; many think that the oftener they send their men to Hell dur- ing practice, the surer they are of sending them to ViSory in the conte^. Don'tf for Heaven's sake, ask ^^ people how one ought to go clubs about getting into Social clubs. it isn't considered polite. Ju^ why, I can't tell you4 but you'll 27 ~ T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK learn why, some day, if you are the right sort ^"^^^ Don't hesitate to accept all PRi^i^ chances for making friends, espe- cially among your Class. Don't think that you can always con- trol the making of friends; you can't Friends are Heaven-sent Hold the ones you make, and count yourself lucky if you make half a^ dozen very good friends your fir^ year. There is a differ- ence between acquaintances and friends, by the way, ju^ as there is a difference between fellows to whom you'd casucJly offer a cig- arette and those to whom you'd gladly offer your pocket-book. B^uD^ Don't rely too much on preju- dice in deciding what certain fel- lows may or may not be good for. You may or may not be right. Your ^andard may or may not be the only small ^one on the secishore. 28 DONT ANSWER BACK IF THE CXDACH SPEAKS HARSHLY TO YOU T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK Don*t invite everybody you ^JJJq meet to your room. It doesn't pay. But make a point of accept- ing as many invitations as possible which come from men you like. Visit any upper-classman who takes the trouble to offer you his hospitality. It may help you to get on, later. Dont shake hands like a clam. JJjJJ^ The flipper-shake is not popular, shake and may make you di^ru^ed. You'll need a good hand-shake all through College. Don't be one of those who ™e . II . 1 .1 . WOMAN continually pick up anything on question-. the ^reet that wears a bonnet question- and high heels. There are lots ^ of girls who are willing, at any time, to be seen with a College man. The varities differ. Some are genuinely pretty ; others wear the deliberate as di^nguished from the natural complexion, be- ing perhaps not so well pre- 29 T^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK served as carefully preserved. Maybe you think it is great fun to take a partner into the small hotel dining-room with an " I-do- this-every-evening*' kind of air. But you may find out, after smok- ing your brandy and drinking your cigarettes, that it isn't pleas- ant to be played for a ^^ good thing/' ^ unqueI Don% hov^ever, negledt any TTONABLE opportunity to meet ladies of your own Nation. You are sure to require their society from time to time. The Monastic life is not profitable for a man at College. The purr of pretty women and the occasional exchange of amicable nothings will preserve your social soul and keep the little blood" pumping organ in good condition. THE ART Don't hesitate to hear other ^"^^™^^ people*s opinions. The World did not begin, nor will it end, with you. 30 \ T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S DONT BCX)K WHERE SUCCESS Don't strut or look patronizing, if you happen to have success; ^^^ it makes people feel sorry for you. Dont forget the little things; JJJ^ fellows notice them. Some will ™^^ even judge you by the way you give or receive a match or cigarette. Dont imagine that your entire ^^^^ success in College will be finally problem measured by the number of Clubs you make during your fir^ year. Always remember, that it is the ^landing of the ones you iden- tify yourself with which coimts. Don*t join any final Club or Society until you feel pretty sure you could not do better. 31 T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S DON'T BOOK AS TO THINGS IN GENERAL SAVING AND ONT expedt to lay WASTING <^-^| p^ up a bank account by what you save from living inside your allowance. There are lots of un- expecfled things coming up which co^ money. Only be careful and choose the things that seem neces- sary. You can't saDe much money; but you don't have to waste a cent to live and be a gentleman. Don 't forget to write home once every so often. Mama and Papa are always glad to see the College-town po^mark ; and, like as not, Papa is paying your way through College. Think how you'd feel, if he forgot, some- times, to send that check ^ 32 WRITING HOME T"E COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S DONT BOOK WHEN FATHER Don't treat Father or Uncle John shabbily if one of them happens jq^ '^^ in town unexpedledly. Maybe you 'II have a son or a nephew in the old place one day; and then you 'II like to take a run out, once in a while, and see how things are getting on. Don't swagger when you go ^^^ home for your fir^ Thanksgiving "^'^ or Chri^lmas vacation. It doesn't make your friends envious of you. It's apt to make them sore. Don't think that because you RUNNING BILLS can charge things at almo^ any Sore in the College Town, it is your duty to have your name on the books of ei^ery firm. You don't need to back every enterprise ; be- sides, moS every firm has a habit of rendering monthly bills, and a few of these make even a fair allowance look washed out and faded. that Don't think that it is your mobile 33 T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK Father's duty to present you with an automobile. In Father's day, it was possible for a boy to go through College without one of \ these things. Remember that it co^s a few pence to repair them and run them; — or rather run them and then repair them ; and Father's twenty years in busi- ness have taught him a feu) things. Many a father would as soon buy his son an auto, but is not willing to endow one. PAWNING Don't pawn your watch or sleeve-links during your fir^ year. This privilege is limited to up- per-classmen who do Society. A pawn-ticket is a very compromis- ing thing if found by some of your close relatives. You don't know what it is ? It is a thin slip of paper somewhat resembling a check ; only it weighs more heaty ily on the mind. No matter how funny a ^ory you make at home 34 YOUR WATCH DONT PAWN YOUR WATCH DURING YOUR FIRST YEAR T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S PONT BOOK of pawning your Grandfather's watch, the heads of the family never see the joke. When you rake in the price of exchange for your pawned watch, it seems ju^ like ^nc//n^ money, bat when you pay it back out of a slim allow- ance at the end of the month, it seems like losing the same amount, plus. Don't buy cigars in wholesale Looked quantities from my^erious-look- ^^ ing foreigners, who say they have ju^ done a neat little job of smuggling from Havana, and are willing to let you in on a good thing. They may even flatter you by telling you that you look tru^- worthy. They really mean that you look easy. It's your move. Dont give money to able- beggars bodied beggars. Some may even speak good French or German. If you happen to be taking French or German, you will imagine that 35 T»^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK you are the only one in the world who can help them. But don't yield. As for crippled or blind and deaf beggars, help them now and then. You don't have to li^en to their reminiscences of Life in a Saw-mill to do this, un- less you care for that sort of thing. ^"oF™ N^ Don 't kill your conscience in re- YouRowN ^^^^ to matters which you have BUSINESS been brought up to see in certain definite lights. If you think play- ing cards for money and the drinking of beer wrong, then don t play and dont indulge. You'll never be thought less of in Col- lege for hanging on to principle. Ju^ be sure that your principles are worth kicking up for, cind then sticks A wise old Englishman puts it this way: "Obey your con- science ; but ju^ be sme that your conscience is not that of an ass^ ^T^ Don 7 get into the little game too BOARDS often. Under certain conditions 36 T»^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK it's as easy as rolling off the decalogue. Sometimes you get in because you're afraid others will think you are cifraid to play. This is really not courage. A word more: when you're in, often the time when you thinly you can't afFord to ^op is ju^ the time when you can be^ afford it. Take this advice ; it is better than that of R. E. Morse. Don't keep spending money for ^^J)^^^ a lot of things that you would hardly care to itemize in the account you send to Father. Re- member how he said, " I'll keep you decently, only I don't want College to make only a sport of my boy." Sometimes, when you are pressed, you think of asking Father to lend you money to be paid hacJz with intere^, when you get older. Don't be surprised if he refuses and asks, " Where's your collateral"? Remember that the _ T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK Business World, hunting about for something to which to attach its respedt and admiration, does not single out the Undergraduate in College. ^oNEY Don't be ashamed of chances to earn money in College, if you need it. More fellows earn their way through College than you have any idea of. College men have lots of respedt for a fellow who isn't £ishamed to worl^. Smeact Don't be a Sport or a Snob. Either is fatal. The dead game a6l plays itself out sooner than those who work it suppose, and serves oftener to point a weakness than adorn a virtue. iMTTATTNG £f^^>f ^.^^-fafe the manner of some one else. When you try to be like some one else, you only succeed in being unlike yourself. People don't expecft or want you THEFANCY to be like them. "^ K)SE Don't pretend that you have a 38 T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK fancy income, if you haven't. It*s a cheap, expensive pose. Lots of fellows get money regularly from home. All they have to do, it would seem, is to rip open letters and sign their names on the back of what falls out. If you arent in this class, don't pretend you are. It isn't how much money you've got, but how you make what youve got do, that shows you up a good one. Don't fail to keep one eye on that that bank account. It slowly and account surely dwindles. It needs watch- ing especially, about the time the elms put on their new leaves, and the undergraduates their new flannel trousers. To end the year with an over-drawn bank account is risky. No fellow can afford to have his credit go below par. Don't negledt the health habit. ^^^^^ Sub^tute the tennis racquet for the cigarette, one of these days, 39 T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK and note the difference. It may make you feel like a King in the pinlz of condition; after which you'll probably try it again, which won't hurt you a bit. JOKES Don't repeat all the jokes that come into your head. Avoid es- pecially jokes that may be old. Many a fellow's popularity may hinge on the fadt that he'll listen to a funny ^ory without insi^ing on telling another that isn't quite so funny. 5HOWJG D^^>i^ if y^^ ^j.^ fj.Qj^ ^ l^^g^ well-to-do Preparatory School, talk too much about it, or think that the College mu^ be run on the same plan as your school. Your views may not be appre- ciated. Dont aspire to be taken for an upper-classman by cultivating a walk or a swagger or an air. You can work this so hard, that finally you are the only one deceived. 40 SWAGGER. ING T»^ COLLEGE FRESHM AN^S PONT BOOK Don't be rowdyish, or get the rowdyism reputation of being a drunken fel- low. The real fun you get out of College need not be a continual round of batting. Don 't think it is always entirely b^ng'^ the other man's fault if he fails snubbed to speak to you. If you have not the ability to make an im- pression worth another's remem- bering, look lo yourself. Dont be a fool This is the ^^ sum and the sub^ance of all that herein precedes. A fellow shows himself a fool or not a fool by his habits. College habits are funny things. The sooner you form your College habits the better^ — or worse. To put off the sensible resolve till the time of your lai^ exam may be as useless as the call of the doCtor after the minister has left. Don't imagine for a moment beingthe that coming to College enables ass 4\ T"^ COLLEGE FRESHMAN^S PONT BOOK you to adl in a superior way to others who have not enjoyed the same privilege. A College career is a grand, good thing; but its objeS is to enable you, if possible, better to understand the World, not to lift you at all above it. The World hates a fool; but a College-bred fool, it thoroughly despises. Don't let your ears grow long, and don't bray. BEiNGA Don't imagine that the College ^^MiS Catalogue^ or even this book, can tell you all the things you need to know concerning how to make a man of yourself. After all, its really up to you. Look about, and be a gentleman. You say, "But these few remarks hardly begin to solve the problem.'* And echo answers, " VERBUM SAPr 42 HERE ENDS THE COLLEGE FRESHMAN'S DONT BOOK BY G. F. E. (A. B.) A SYMPATHIZER. DECO- RATIONS AND INITIALS BY RAYMOND CARTER ILLUSTRATIONS BY CHARLES FRANK INGERSON PUBLISHED BY PAUL ELDER & COMPANY AND PRINTED FOR THEM BY THE TOMOYE PRESS UNDER THE DIRECTION OF J. H. NASH IN THE CITY OF SAN FRANCISCO DURING THE MONTH OF MAY AND YEAR NINETEEN HUNDRED & TEN 2/UD THIS BOOK IS DUE ON THE LAST DATE STAMPED BELOW AN INITIAL FINE OF 25 CENTS WILL BE ASSESSED FOR FAILURE TO RETURN THIS BOOK ON THE DATE DUE. THE PENALTY WILL INCREASE TO 50 CENTS ON THE FOURTH DAY AND TO «libo ON THE SEVENTH DAY OVERDUE. 3 ,>i^ WAY 111933 OCT 31 1884 ,A^Y25^970 3 8 ^^^•D LD 4JA NiftR 30 1936 NOV 4 1936 MAY 8 1937 APB 8 RECL -«-> NOV V S60 2670 ■SPJH -i I LD 21-50m-8,-3i t.f. ., m io4£,2 UNIVERSITY OF. CAUFORNIA LIBRARY