3 an?'' p. 273 I STRAY YANKEE TEX A S. BY PHILIP PAXTON. REDFIELD, 110 A 112 NASSAU STREET, NEW YORK. 1853. ENTERED, according to Act of Congress, in the year 1853, By J. S. REDFIELD, In the Clerk's Office of the District Court for the Southern District of New York. v tivtt . IT is customary for an author, upon launching his " frail bark," to jump up in the bow and make quite a bow-wow about it. My bow shall be hasty and my speech curt. A few ot the suc- ceeding chapters have already appeared in some of the leading periodicals of the day, but as they were intimately connected w4th, .and indispensably necessary to my story, I was forced to re-write and introduce them here. Should, therefore, any reader of the "Whig," or the "Democratic Review," or the "Literary World," or the " Spirit of the Times," find among these pages something that may remind him of an old acquaintance, let him not accuse the author of plagiarism, or indeed of any other literary crime, except perhaps that of occasionally picking his own pockets an excusa- ble offence in one who has drunk of the Sabine waters ; for a sin- gular but veracious account of whose miraculous effects, please examine the " Introduction." The author trusts that no apology will be necessary for intro- ducing the two papers at the close of the volume, as they are perfectly germane to the subject. A STRAY YANKEE IN TEXAS. PAGE PREFACE, . vii INTRODUCTION, ix CHAPTER I. BEAR AND SNAKE. Bear Sign A Queer Rig Mr. and Mrs. Joe Feminine Accomplish- mentsBear About The Snakes The Hatchet Misses Fire The Hunting Party The Pack, CHAPTER II. MORE SNAKE THAN BEAR, Caesar's Disquisition The " Timber" A Fire in the Rear Repairing damages The Bear Treed Stand from Under Moore puts his Foot in it Snake Bitten Scraps of Early Piety A Miracle, . 27 CHAPTER III. MORE BEEF THAN VENISON. Fire Hunting Creasing a Horse Neck or Nothing The Fire Pan The "Wrong Customer, 37 CHAPTER IV. SALUTATORY A WILD-GOOSE CHASE AND A MARfi's NEST. An Arrival Imposing Ceremony A Judge, but no Lawyer Lefe Thompson Reasons for Travelling Uncle Billy Prepares for Action The Enemy's Camp The Sub Sheriff More Plague than Profit, . 48 ii CONTENTS. CHAPTER V. THE BIG THICKET THE AUTHOR IN A FIX. P1GB A Native Speculator Nice Travelling Scylla and Charybdis Beau- ties of a Cypress-brake The River Joe, on Sunday Fishing A Round Turn The Labyrinth, 54 CHAPTER VI. HOW I CAUGHT A " CAT," AND WHAT I DID WITH IT. The River Plunge in the Dark A Self-fishing Pole The Barbecue A Tough Customer, CHAPTER VII. THE RIVER CAMP. Solitude Our Forest Home Tocalization A Horse Chuckle Pork and Potatoes A 'Chef-d'GEuvre Locomotive Currency Honest Bob, 69 CHAPTER VIII. STORIES BY THE CAMP FIRE. Laffitte The Secret Betrayed A Damp Climate The Old "Woman The Bitter Curse, 81 CHAPTER IX. A WEDDING AND A WOLF-HUNT. Changing Quarters A Wet Bridegroom Muster of the Forces The Chase is up Recruiting The Enemy's Sortie The Hide in Dan. ger, 89 CHAPTER X. MORE WATER THAN PLEASANT. The River makes a "Raise" Joe Overboard Yell and Water Navi- gating a Brake Dry Land Coasting, 102 CHAPTER XL NEW ACQUAINTANCES UNCLE BILLY AND HIS VERNACULAR. Oft; in the First Boat Roberta and Uncle Billy How Uncle Billy came there Two Grand Divisions Old Rosin-the-Bow 'Ihe Don- key's Entertainment, 110 CONTENTS. ill CHAPTER XIL UNCLE BILLY'S STOET HOW CHARLEY BIKKIIAM -WAS MURDERED. PAGH Shaking off the "Ager" Joe White Joe's Speech The Trail Chalking out the Campaign, 120 CHAPTER XIIL UNCLE BILLY'S STORY CONCLUDED THE FATE OF THE MURDERERS. Bill Stone The Trap Sprung Cabin Surprised Gathering of the Clan Fall of the Curtain, 180 CHAPTER XIV. THE COLONEL'S STORY A SHIPWRECK AND A SCRIMMAGE. Meeting and parting Smoking out a Survey Ladies "Panting" for the Enemy Mexicans in a Quandary A Quarter-race, but no quar- ter, 140 CHAPTER XV. THE COLONEL'S STORY CONCLUDED SPECIMEN OF TALL FIGHTING. Seatsfield The Night Alarm The Fog Lifts Battle Won, and Lost, 150 CHAPTER XVI. SOME OF THE PLEASURES OF A NEW COUNTRY. Rather Damp Off, on their own hook Ants on the March A Select Library, 159 CHAPTER XVII. A CHAPTER ON THE DEER. Jack's Cruise Ashore A Family on Low Diei^-Buck Fight A Cool Proceeding, 166 CHAPTER XVIII. A NIGHT IN A SHINGLE PALACE. Proposed Compromise Council of War Uncle Billy on Lawyers Benefits of " Lumbering" Taking the " Shute," . . . .177 CHAPTER XIX. FETER AND PHYSIC. Romantic Marriage Great Sam and the Little Major New Pilgrim's Progress Double Entry In a Bad Way, 188 iv CONTENTS. CHAPTER XX TERM-TIME IN THE BACKWOODS, AND A MESTANG COURT. PAQ1 Fine flow of Spirits The Lawyers A Kangaroo Judge Taking a Swear An Indictment and a half The Bird of Freedom well Employed, 200 CHAPTER XXI. , DIAMOND CUT DIAMOND STOCKING THE CARDS. A Very Nice Case Sol Wilgus Defining our Position Sol takes the Hint, 213 CHAPTER XXn. A GAME OF BRAG UNCLE BILLY'S OPINION ABOUT " GOING OFF HALF COCKED." The Game Opened " Bluffed off" Great Shot A Little too Smart A Dangerous Pair of Spurs, 222 CHAPTER XXIH. GALVESTON. A Dull City Temporary Prosperity The " Northers " A Well Wa- tered Town, 232 CHAPTER XXIV. UP THE BAT. Red-fish Bar A Bone of Contention Home-made Marriages A Queer Law-suit, 238 CHAPTER XXV. SAN JACINTO BAY. Water-Fowl Peggy Attacks the Texan Army " Plunder" The Mill goes off, 245 CHAPTER XXVI. THE BATTLE OF SAN JACINTO. Rusk in the Field Sherman's Skirmish Sauve qui Pcut The Blow for Freedom Cos and S- ** Anna, 263 CONTENTS. V CHAPTER XXVII. ANOTHER STRAY YANKEE IN TEXAS. PAGB Dolce far Niente Exploring Expedition Brandy Brandy makes a Deposit "Hot and Hot" Playing Possum Improved Mode of Hunting, 264 CHAPTER XXVIII. GENERAL HEIGHT'S TOM A DARK STOEY. Pat de Cow-pen Tom and Milly Mysterious Disappearance The Body Found Signs of Foul Play, 2Y9 CHAPTER XXIX. GENERAL BRIGHr's TOM CONCLUDED. Suspicion The Death Shot A Rude Burial Running Jack Voice from the Grave The Murderer's Fate, 290 CHAPTER XXX. An Ambush The " Coup de Grace" Important Developments The Pursuit A Sudden Pull Up, 302 LYNCH LAW. CHAPTER L THE PIONEER: REGULATORS AND MODERATORS. The Four Classes The Pioneer Law a Dead Letter Regulating a County The Widows of Widow's Creek, . . . . 315 CHAPTER II. GAMBLERS AND DESPERADOES. Judge S The " Court" Indicted Polite Invitation A Slippery Customer Unsatisfactory Physiognomy Murders of Taylor and Floyd Lem M'Guire " Coup de Theatre" 327 Vi CONTENTS. CHAPTER III. THE NON RESISTANT AND THE RIVER DESPERADO. PAGE The Lecturer Skunked Schools for Scandal Travelling Gamblers- Phalanx of Crime, 347 CHAPTER IV. THE LAND PIRATE. Enlisting The Grand Council A Robber Police A Powerful Clan Taken in the Act The Letter Stewart, . . . .354 CHAPTER V. THE WOLF TRAPPED. The Revelation A Nam de Guerre The Rendezvous Grand Council At Home Flight and Recapture 364 CHAPTER VI. JUDGE LTNCH'S INTERFERENCE. The Discovery Emigration of the Clan A Pretty Quarrel A Back- woods Alsatia The Threat Borne Out Death of Stewart and Murrel, .... 374 CHAPTER VII. DEFEAT OF THE GAMBLERS. Dargin "Leads the Column" The JSatchez Affair A Bad Bargain- Sudden Vengeance, 886 STEAM ON THE WESTERN WATERS. The Levee Eastern and Western Boats The Firemen's Refrain The First Mississippi Steamer Perilous Voyage The F,;irtliquake Snags and Sawyers The Old Boatmen Dick Russel Taking a House in Tow A Great Joke Accidents The " Grave Yard " The Fat Boy of the Brian Boroihme 401 DURING many years Texas was a jest for all nations, except perhaps Mexico, to whom indeed she proved a somewhat unpalatable reality. It was once the fashion at the north, to name Texas as the inevitable terminus of every moon- light flitting, whether occasioned by that innate modesty which impels a reserved man to save his creditors from interviews, unpleasant and unprofitable upon both sides ; by a too warm admiration of a neighbor's wife ; the desire to sever one's own matrimonial fetters, by u cutting" one's self; or, in fine, any of the thousand and one reasons which so suddenly at times impart to men a fondness for travel, or desire for the society of strangers, and render an immediate change of climate equally necessary and agreeable. In fact, in the years '38 and '39, when the commercial horizon was dark and lowering, and the sun of prosperity almost obscured by the dust from the over- thrown Bank, and the smoke of the great fire, it became very unsafe indeed, for the tradesman to doze too long of a morning, for if he did, it was at least an equal chance that upon at last arriving at his shop or store, the three otuinous letters G. T. T., done in white chalk by mis- chievous urchin or suspicious creditor would stare him full in the face from the closed shutters of his window, or the panel of the door that had been too long upon the lock. X INTRODUCTION. The Texans themselves indulged in a sly chuckle over their somewhat dubious reputation, and it was quite a common joke to ask a man what his name was at home, and what he came to Texas for. The waters of the Sabine river which stream separates south-eastern Texas from Louisiana were said to produce peculiar effects upon all who drank, bathed in, or even crossed their yellow cur- rent. They were supposed to be a perfect Lethe to all remaining consciousness of the correct distinction between meum and tuum which the immigrant might yet retain, and it is recorded that one individual was so severely affected by the combined consequences of a draught and & bath, that finding nothing else to appropriate, he * adopted" his own under garment, which he had previ- ously washed and hung out to dry, and concealed it so carefully from himself, that when its services were needed, they were not to be had upon any terms. Such, at least, was the tale he told, to account for a very apparent scarcity of linen, and there was thought to be some truth in his story, as it was very evident that he had been drinking something ; although the Sabine water must have been of universal potency, to judge from the aroma that hung around him. An incredulous wight suggested, that as there was a small grocery upon the bank, perhaps the man being very dry, had drunk up his shirt. Did Texas deserve the contumely thus unsparingly heaped upon her ? Quite the reverse. The population of this entire territory, consisting of whites, negroes, and Indians, did not exceed forty thousand at the time of the invasion by Santa Anna. There were a number of despe- radoes, of the most dangerous and abandoned kind, to be found upon and near the Sabine and the Red rivers ; some INTRODUCTION. xi living upon the United States and some upon the Texas side, accordingly as the danger of apprehension from either government appeared more imminent at the time. Leav- ing the narrow strip of rascality upon the eastern border and, by the way, there is, and has been no country, civilized or uncivilized, without a similar one you found the young republic dotted here and there with small knots of stock-raisers, principally from Louisiana ; a few down- easters, seduced from their hard and stony farms, by the milk and honey tales of some empressario's agent ; an occa- sional doctor looking for a large crop of disease and death ; or, perhaps, one that had fewer reapers in the field ; a lawyer or two, to make the wills as the doctors finished up the patients, to seek for offices and speculate in wild lands ; a large number of the true pioneers who shot, fished, and trapped for a living, treading closely in the footprints of the retiring Indians ; and certain disappointed men, or those who having lost caste at home went abroad to regain name, and fame, and fortune. A more honest, careless, and hospitable community than that of interior Texas it would be impossible to conceive of, or to meet with anywhere this side of Utopia. Crime of any kind was not tolerated. Every stranger was wel- comed, aided, and respected, if he did but conduct himself with propriety. After 1836 the population was much reduced. Fear, famine, and Mexican slaughter had taken away many of the settlers, driven others from the land, and completely checked immigration. During the general panic of '38, many cotton planters came to the country and brought their " force" of negroes with them. Some of these left their home in a hurry, and it must be confessed that they had pretty fair reasons for INTRODUCTION. so doing. The banks had been flooding the country with their currency, which was lent in large sums to the few who possessed the right kind of influence. Cotton and sugar had commanded large prices, and the planter bor- rowed money to purchase new plantations and increase their " force." Suddenly the banks went down in one uni- versal crash ; the planters were left with great quantities of the useless " promises to pay," which they had borrowed upon their own notes or on bond and mortgage ; and these amounts were to be paid, although the borrowed bills were valueless. Ruin threatened upon every side ; ruin appa- rently caused by the rascality of the very men who now were to profit by it, by becoming the owners of negroes and lands at the tithe of their value. Those who were not involved in debt for more than one fourth of what their estates were intrinsically worth, saw them absolutely thrown away at a sheriff's sale for perhaps half enough to satisfy the execution. There were men who deemed that they had a right to rescue themselves and their families from utter ruin ; so shouldering their rifles, and arming the more trustworthy of their negroes, they departed secretly for Texas ; and there is one county nearly settled by them. With this hegira commenced the culture of cotton in the interior, for it had hitherto been confined to the eastern portion. As the population increased, and money became more plen- tiful, there came, of course, a proportionate increase of crime. In '42, preparations were made for settling Fisher & Miller's grant with German emigrants ; and for a year previous to the annexation of the star republic with the United States, they came over in great numbers. These INTRODUCTION. xiii men were miserable settlers. They seemed to have left home with the idea that in future they were to live without work, and had doubtless been amused with very Munchau- senish talcs of the facility with which game could be obtained, for every one of them could be seen staggering up the muddy streets at Houston with an interminable equipage of pouches and game bags hung around their necks, and a pair, at least, of heavy German "yagers" upon their shoulders. When they reached the colony, they would not work during the first year, but lived upon the provisions pur- chased by the company, and amused themselves principally in trotting about the prairies, shooting at small birds and getting themselves shot by the Indians. " What new tribe," said Santa Anna the Commanche, and not the Mexican chief to Jack Hays ; " what new tribe have come among us ? They ride along slowly with their eyes bent upon the ground, smoking great pipes, knowing nothing of what is around them, and they never wake up until we have sent an arrow right through them?" Such men were of little use in a new country. Stupid by nature, they became more stupid still by free indul- gence in coarse gluttony and sottishness, and generally finished themselves off in three or four years. Times and people have changed, but still there remains enough of the old leaven, of the simple-hearted stock rais- ers and small farmers, to keep the average morality of Texas up to the standard of that of any other State, not excepting even the boasted land of steady habits. The towns in Texas, at the time of the revolution, were few and of small importance ; such as San-Antonio-de- XIV INTRODUCTION. Bcxar, with a population thoroughly Mexican, Nacogdo- ches and San Augustin in the eastern part, several small villages such as Victoria, Liberty, Harrisburg, Jasper, and a few military posts as Anahuac, I seed 'em feedin' when I went up de prairie, and when I cum back agin I jist make de pony fass, and crawl out in de timber, and dar dey was, all down, and dey'r mighty apt to be near dar yet das a fac, I'll swore it." "Yes, you black scoundrel," returned Dave, "that's 40 MORE BEEF THAN VENISON. where you were so late to-night, and that's the way you lost half the COAVS, is it ?" " Now, look heah, Massa Dave, don't ye allers told me to keep my eye skinned, and look out for deer meat when I'm about on de prairie ?" " I did not tell you," retorted Dave, " to quit your busi- ness, and leave half the cows behind." " Never mind that now," interrupted Joe ; " about the deer ; I'd like to get some meat afore I go home anyhow. Casse ! hev you got any fireworks ? I don't want to draw my load." Csesar replied to this question by pulling down a hand- ful of moss from an overhanging branch, and selecting from it, by feeling, the black or dead portion of it, he threw the rest away. Next he broke off the tiny twigs from the ends of some fallen boughs, and then putting a few grains of powder upon a wad of cotton, went to work with flint and steel, and soon the mass was on fire. The burning cotton was then placed in the centre of a quantity of the dried moss, and whirled rapidly about until a blaze broke forth. It was then deposited upon the ground, the dead sticks placed upon it, and in a few moments a cheerful fire was burning in the old forest, throwing its light over a small circle, around which appeared a wall of darkness, apparently tenfold more dense than before." The negro then drew from his pocket a few chips of light wood, or heart of the pitch pine, and having ignited them, threw them into the pan, and we were ready for our fire-hunt. Cassar went ahead, carrying the pan ; Joe nearly abreast of him, claiming the post of honor as being more THE WRONG CUSTOMER. 41 experienced in seeing and discriminating between the yarious kinds of " eyes" than any other of the company. The rest of us except Baze, who was packed off with the dogs followed closely. Having approached the prairie, we skirted it for some distance, moving along steathily and silently in the now open timber. Joe's keen eyes peered about in every direction, but for a long time in vain. We had proceeded in this manner for nearly two miles, the fire-pan had been replenished seve- ral times before anything worthy of note occurred, and the whole party were about wearied out, when a sharp " hist," sibillated from Joe's lips, brought us to a halt. A slight rustle immediately before us attracted our observa- tion, and we saw glimmering in the surrounding darkness what appeared to be two balls of fire. Joe shook out his priming, carefully wiped the " frizen " and pan with a bit of woollen rag, rubbed his thumb nail across his flint, re-primed, and, bringing his rifle up, took deliberate aim. " Massa Joe," whispered Cassar at this critical juncture, " best look sharp ; don't like them eyes, anyway." An impatient gesture was Joe's only reply. The aim was again taken, and the crack of the rifle resounded in the still night, making a thousand echoes in among the old woods. " Bl-a-a-a," was heard in very bovine accents from the direction of the victim, while from the prairie arose a shout, " D-o-o-n't fire. Murder ! Help !" "Massa Joe's gone done it dis time for sartin," ex- claimed the negro. " Dat deer's a two-yer-ole, dis chile'll swar." A few steps brought us to the scene of bloodshed, and 42 MORE BEEF THAN VENISON. there, extended upon the ground, and. in the agonies of death, lay a fine young heifer, bearing Joe's ear-crop and brand. Joe's rage and sorrow were as nothing to his shame, for a man who shoots "beef" instead of "deer" is for ever after a laughing-stock to the settlement. A halloo, in reply to the shout from the prairie, soon produced an answer, and a return in the person of the redoubtable Poke, who, fairly bewildered, had been following our mov- ing light, with the idea that it proceeded from the settle- ment. Making the best of the accident, Joe and the rest soon had the unfortunate heifer skinned and dressed. Wearied and worn out, wet with the heavy dew, and scratched and torn with thorns and briers, we slowly returned home, bear- ing a very ignoble trophy of our achievements. CHAPTER IV. SALUTATORY, A WILD-GOOSE CHASE, AND A MARE'S NEST. VERY little attempt at early rising was made by any of our hunting party on the following morning, and small was the inclination that Joe or I felt for timber hunting, when once fairly up. He poked about his cabin and field, flattering himself with the delusive idea that he was at work, and I, mounting my horse, galloped off upon the prairie, after nothing in particular. I had returned, din- ner had been eaten during it, Joe's wife asked him if he would have some " deer :" a mistake of hers, probably, as I never knew her to joke the accustomed pipe had been smoked, and all the males of the settlement were stretched out upon their blankets, enjoying their wonted siesta, when a horseman dashed up to the fence, in front of Joe's mansion, and gave the usual " halloo." I looked out, and perceived that the horse had evidently been severely pushed, as his reeking flanks and the lather upon his sides bore testimony. The " halloo" brought Joe to his senses first, and then to the door. Whatever press of business there may be, a certain necessary ceremonial is always to be sacredly observed before a visit to a cabin is paid. First, the rider shouts out "halloo," which means, " Got)d people, I am here, and here I mean to stay until you come out and keep the dogs off;" then, after an inter- val, the proprietor makes his appearance, and very lei- 44 A WILD-GOOSE CHASE AND A MAEE's NEST. surely approaches the fence without speaking a word ; he next throws one leg over the fence, then the other follows ; and, having attained the top, seats himself very delibe- rately upon it, and awaits the next move from the other party. The latter now brings his horse alongside the fence, and the conversation commences. " How are ye, Judge ?" " I'm right peart how's yerself ?" " Oh, I keep a pushin' how's the old woman and the boys ?" " Considerable sassy, only thar's been a smart chance of ager down in our neck of the woods." " Got a smart chunk of a pony thar." " Yes, sir, he's some pumkins sure ; offered ten cows and calves for him ; he's death on a quarter." " Come from down the prairie ?" " Yes, sir, and hurried up my critter right smart, I tell you." "How's the craps?" " Well, they ain't nothin' to brag on, though we've got a gush of peaches." The gentleman upon the fence now descends from it with due deliberation, and, approaching the occupant of the horse, shakes hands with him in a most solemn and edify- ing manner ; he then surveys the horse from stem to stern, probably examines his mouth to ascertain his age ; and having performed all these duties with due decorum, he next proceeds to exhibit his hospitality. " Come, Judge, 'light and tie your horse out." Without any further remark, the Judge did as he was desired ; and having found a stake driven in the ground, he affixed to it A JUDGE, BUT NO LAWYER. 45 one end of the caberos (hair rope) which was attached to his horse's neck, took off saddle and bridle, hung them upon the fence, and made for the house. The great gravity with which such affairs are invariably- conducted, amused me very much until I became accustom- ed to it, and came to look upon it as a matter of course. The new arrival was no less a personage than Judge Guffey, an Irishman, and the oldest settler in the county. In consequence of his long residence he had been elected Judge of the probate court, although it was a great exer- tion for him to write his name. The office he had held for a number of years, until the business of the court had so increased that it nearly distracted him with the im- mense labor of thinking that it involved ; and the young lawyers had driven him within an inch of madness, by the manifest disrespect that they entertained for his decisions, and the manifold ways they employed to reverse them. He resigned, and was then chosen Justice of the Peace. In spite of all the deliberation which had characterized his proceedings, the Judge was in a great hurry. A cer- tain scampish genius, known as Lefe Thompson, who was notoriously addicted to betting upon quarter races, play- ing old sledge and poker, and to little else, having bor- rowed money, and run pretty deeply into debt, had now taken a new step, and run off altogether. As he lived in the woods, he expected to get off into the next county before any of his neighbors were aware of it ; but his negro woman had the night previous met her lover " by moonlight alone," and disclosed the secret. The Judge had been called upon to issue some kind of paper to stay Mr. Thompson's further proceedings in the case, and as his usual amanuensis chanced to be absent, 46 A WILD-GOOSE CHASE AXD A MARE'S XEST. he had hurried off to beg my assistance, after having dis- patched one party in pursuit of a deputy sheriff, who had been seen on the prairie in the morning, and another to a creditor who had lately obtained a judgment against the runaway, with directions to join him the Judge at Joe's settlement. In half an hour the expected party rode up, and the same interesting ceremonial having been gone through with, in a grave and solemn manner, they entered, and we proceeded to business. It appeared that although several of the creditors of the runaway had commenced suits against him, but one of them, however, had approached sufficiently near fruition to have been converted into a judgment. In the backwoods, a lawsuit, even a petty one, is an affair of time and moment. About a year is required to bring it as far as a decision in the minor courts ; then of course it is carried up, and after standing upon the calen- dar of the District Court for two or three years, is decided pro or con ; and then the losing party -invariably trans- ports it to be settled before the collected judicial wisdom of the country embodied upon the supreme bench. Mr. Lefe Thompson, however, to save all entanglements of the kind, and perhaps with a proper regard for his own purse and those of his neighbors, as soon as suits began to multiply, and legal papers to fall around his devoted dwelling, thick (in number) as leaves are supposed to be in Valombrosa, had cut the Gordian knot, and as Judge Guffey would have said " taken the shute." Lefe had conducted the whole affair very shrewdly. The planters and stock-raisers had but very little money among them, and that little was too often used for gam- REASONS FOR "TRAVELLING." 47 bling purposes alone ; many knew no other use for it. It would have been a sin to have paid it away for " store goods," since the hides of their slaughtered cattle were always taken in trade for tobacco, coffee, and powder. For all neighborhood purposes, the legal tender was cows and calves ; and so when by any accident a little hard currency was obtained, it was religiously laid aside and husbanded until a game of " seven up," or " poker," caused it to change pockets, generally into those of some of the petty gamblers that are continually travelling to and fro, trading horses, making quarter races,, and always to be met with at every frolic in the county, on the look- out for a customer. Lefe had been successful, and was supposed to have amass- ed quite a " pile," which he was very loath indeed to part with ; and when he lost, if the money were not absolutely staked, he would usually put off the winner with some old horse that he had fixed up for sale, or a dubious note that he had received as " lanyappe," (Anglice, boot money.) If he won. however, nothing but the article itself would satisfy him ; and -so by getting what he could, and keeping what he got^ he came to be considered as the " man of money" in his " neck-of-the-woods." Some severe losses, however, had lately shaken his credit ; so, collecting all his debts, in some form or another, he had converted their proceeds into a valuable female slave ; and to avoid payment of his obligations, he resolved to cancel them by a moonlight flitting. Had he committed any act that the rude people among whom' he lived would have considered a crime, they would have made short work with him. Had he stolen horses, or killed another's beeves, they would have followed him, 48 A WILD-GOOSE CHASE AND A MARE'S NEST. stripped him of his property, and, if the offence had been of a sufficiently heinous nature, given him a terrible flog- ging, accompanied by a warning to quit the country. Nay, under sufficient provocation, they might, perchance, have hung him to the nearest tree ; but as this was simply an affair of dollars and cents, coupled with nothing that they considered crime, he was to be overtaken by the law, or allowed to go off scot-free. Had he been of a surly, quarrelsome nature, it would, perhaps, have gone hard with him ; but being particularly rollicking, noisy, and good-humored, his creditors only considered that he had been too smart for them, and were rather amused than otherwise at the affair. His principal debts amounted to some five or six hundred dollars ; but the only one for which an execution could be issued, was less than thirty, which he might, and would probably pay, and so escape pretty cheaply, even if overtaken. Old Judge Guffey, however, had a plan of his own ; and, in furtherance of it, had dispatched a messenger after the deputy sheriff a man of noted coolness and determin- ed bravery, who would not hesitate a moment in the dis- charge of his duty, even if his own life were staked upon the issue. The attachment was drawn up, and we waited until near sundown for the messenger and sheriff. At length the former appeared without the latter. He had failed in overtaking his man. This was very unfortunate for the judge's plan, as the only thing available in the form of a constable, was an old man who had sought the office for the honor of it, and who, from his universal good humor, and careless, obliging disposition, was entirely unfitted for the performance of his duties. He was unanimously BILLY PREPARES FOR ACTION. 49 elected, year after year, because no one was willing to oppose or vote against old Billy Perkins. He did admirably as far as the service of subpoenas and summonses was concerned ; but when the case was concluded, and an execution placed in his hands, if it ever got out of them, the document was sure to appear endors- ed "no property found." During his whole official career he had never been, known to make a levy ; but having conducted the affair to a trial, he invariably washed his hands of it, and left the litigants to settle it as they best could. There was, however, no other resource, and so " Uncle Billy" was mounted upon a fast horse, armed with a rifle, and an execution, and ordered to seize upon the wench and bring her back refusing all offer of other settlement. In this manner the claims of the other creditors were to be satisfied, as soon as their suits had been hurried through the requisite forms ; and to expedite matters, Billy carried with him quite a number of summonses to be served upon Lefe. Billy now called for a volunteer aid ; and, impelled by the fun of the thing, the desire to know how the old man would act in an emergency, and what trick the supple Lefe would resort to, I offered to accompany him ; warn- ing him, however, that I would have nothing further to do with the affair than to see that he was not interfered with in the performance of his duties. As Lefe had taken his departure at about four in the morning, he might, had he followed the direct road, have crossed the county line and been out of danger ere this ; but he had chosen an out-of-the-way trail through the woods, which he was forced to follow for five or six miles, 3 50 A WILD-GOOSE CHASE AND A MARE'S XEST. and then turning off, to lose as many more before the direct path could be regained. As this made his distance nearly forty miles, it was all but impossible that he could have accomplished it, incumbered as he was with his family, all his household gods, and a Texas wagon, filled with what, in this case, was literally " plunder," drawn by those miserably slow oxen beeves, as a Texan calls them for which this part of the country is noted. We hurried on as fast as the bad trail, and the darkness which now set in, would permit. We had to stop now and then to pick up our hats, which overhanging boughs would take a fancy to ; then Uncle Billy's pipe required to be replenished and relit ; then again we had to call at a set- tler's cabin upon the road, where we obtained some intel- ligence of the fugitives, but were forced to remain until a cup of coffee was served a piece of Texan hospitality offered to every visitor, stranger or not, and one that it is an unpardonable breach of etiquette to refuse. We had to swim muddy bayous not a very pleasant operation at any time, but an especially undesirable recreation at night to proceed cautiously over marshy ground, and slowly with declining heads among the tree?, and the " wee short hour ayont the twal " had come and gone, before the light of a smouldering fire by the roadside, at some distance before us, gave token that we were approaching a camp. " Thar they are," said Uncle Billy, exultingly, " best look to our guns." While we were taking the usual precaution of fresh priming our arms, the shooting up of a more brilliant light, and the rising of a cloud of sparks from the camp- fire, proved that not only was Lefe stirred up himself, but THE ENEMY'S CAMP. 51 that he had stirred up his fire to receive us, perhaps to treat us to a fire of a more unpleasant nature. Approaching nearer, the figure of a man appeared in the centre of the road, gun in hand. " Hold on, strangers," he cried, " I ain't fond of company this time of night. Keep off, or I'll fotch ye." " No ye don't, Lefe," said Uncle Billy ; " drop yer shoot- in' iron, or ye'll git mor'n ye send ; there's two agin one, my sonny." " Hoppee ! why, Uncle Billy, is that you ? Dog-on-my- cat, ef I ain't glad to see you. Come, ride up and light. Here, Sally ! jump about, and make Uncle Billy and the stranger a cup of coffee." We alighted from our horses, and poor Billy unfolded his business to the runaway. " Why, bless yer old soul, I ain't got nothing. Ask Sally, there ; I ain't got but five dollars to take all on us clar to San Antone ; and ye wouldn't take that, would ye, Uncle Billy ?" "No, Lefe, ye can keep your money* I'm consarned sorry for it, but I must take that ar yaller gal back with me." " My yaller gal ? Why, thar ain't but one execution out agin me, and that's for twenty dollars and costs. You can't touch the gal for that." Here quite a scene ensued ; the wife crying, the girl absolutely yelling out her grief, the children bringing up the chorus, and at last Lefe himself set up a regular bohoo* At last, Lefe took Billy on one side, and, showing him a valuable horse that was staked out, offered, with a sigh, to give him up. For some time Billy refused, but at length 52 A WILD-GOOSE CHASE AND A MARE'S NEST. Lefe's arguments touching the illegality of seizing the wench when proper security was offered him, worked upon his fears, and the dismal howl kept up by the feminine and juvenile portion of the assemblage, touched his heart, and he consented. The storm passed away, and all was bright again. Lefe forced us to take a cup of coffee, brought out the whiskey-bottle, and pressed us warmly to stay all night. "We, however, thought it best to decline his solicita- tions ; and after shaking hands with us, as if we were his best friends, he bade us good-by, remarking as we rode off, " Next time I'm within a mile of the river, I reckon I'll cross over, and 'camp on t' other side." What a pleasant ride we had homeward, and how delightful an assistance to a journey is a led horse, it boots not now to describe. We arrived at Joe's as the whole party we had left there were taking breakfast. The judge, being defrauded of his fees, swore mildly ; but the rest considered it a pretty good joke, as much as might be expected from Uncle Billy, who, upon the whole, was rather proud of his exploit. Ere our meal was finished, a " halloo " called us to the door. It was the sub-sheriff. " I want to see Uncle Billy," said he. " Here's Uncle Billy," replied the gentleman. " What is it, Dick?" " I've a message for ye from Lefe Thompson," continued the sub-sheriff. "I called at his camp very early this morning, and he sent his thanks to you for leading back his father's horse, that he had borrowed to carry his wife MORE PLAGUE THAN PROFIT. 53 to the river, and wanted you to send him to the old man to-day, if possible." " There," said Judge Guffey ; " Uncle Billy, you are like your last night's job, more plague than profit." CHAPTER Y. THE BIG THICKET THE AUTHOR " IN A FIX." A DAY or two had passed by, after Mr. Lefe Johnson's escapade, when Joe and I again took up our line of march for the " Big Thicket." Had Joe been a Gothamite " to the manner born," his genius and inclination would have led him to Wall street, for he was great upon speculation, usually spending one third of his time in expeditions " up country " in search of silver mines ; another third in hunting " bee trees," and taking possession ; and the greater part of the remainder in studying how to get a living without work. But, alas 1 Joe had never heard of " bulls" without horns, nor dreamed of meeting a " bear" unless there was mischief " bruin." The labor of a few days sufficed to make his somewhat scanty crop a few more to gather his stock of cattle, and this left him the rest of the year to follow the bent of his inclination, which, without being what may be technically described as " crooked," never- theless had as many twists and ramifications as the horn of a veteran of the flock and fold. His last silver mine speculation had, as usual, proved unfortunate. He had spent six months in vainly search- ing the banks of the upper " Trinity," for the much covet- ed treasure, but found no banks there that paid specie. He had barely escaped starvation, and being scalped by the Indians, had returned home not particularly overburdened BACKWOODS INDEPENDENCE. 55 with clothing, and with the little that remained, of a multifarious and forlorn character, for his tailoring had been of the rudest ; somewhat approaching the Adam and Eve style of the art. His tobacco, coffee, and ammunition the three sine qua nons of a backwoodsman were nearly expended, and so he set his scheming head to work, to find or invent aut viam invenit aut fecit some plan to procure a proper supply. These three aforesaid articles, as I have just hinted, to a frontier man, are strictly speaking the indis- pensables, for a small patch of cotton and an industrious wife provide his clothing, or if necessary the never failing rifle is called into requisition for a buckskin. A minute portion of the surface .of our universal mother supplies his bread ; almost all are provided with a stock of cattle or drove of hogs, and if not, the universal rifle is again summoned into the field. A wolf skin, or the nearest palmetto brake, furnishes him with a hat, and a raw hide or deer skin, with a cover- ing to his feet. So that if his be not a life of genuine, though too often lazy independence, we know not the cor- rect interpretation of the term. Within four miles of Joe's cabin, through a thicket so dense that even in that country of tangled forest, it is known par excellence as the big thicket, runs the San Jacinto, a stream whose waters, pure and pellucid, traverse the finest timber in the world, and according to Joe's account, are patronized by an extensive variety of very superior fish. Xow this fish part of the business was put in -as a magnet, lo attract me, and I had to trust Joe's word for it, as he was the only man in the settlement who had ventured to explore the tangled maze. 56 THE AUTHOR " IN A FIX." Joe's brain had generated a prodigious idea, worthy at the least of the immortal Jack Tibbets, and the sum of it was, to go to Houston and pick up a score or so of the disbanded volunteers that were hanging about the town, with whom to enter into an extensive lumbering operation in the stave and shingle line. According to his calcula- tion a fortune was to be realized in a very short time ; but having had some slight experience in his vagaries, I determined to reason the matter with him, and try an experiment ere we plunged blindly into a serious matter. Reason he would not hear he had thought the affair over to his perfect satisfaction, but the experiment he finally agreed to try, and thus the compromise had been ultimately settled. We were first to spend a month in the " timber," to prospect, as they would say nowadays. Joe as master workman and director-in-general ; I as occasional assistant in the shingle business, and fisherman in ordinary attached to the commissariat department. This plan was perfectly satisfactory to me, for one month, I knew, was quite sufficient to give a quietus to any of Joe's plans, that included personal exertions upon his own part ; and in truth I had heard so much of the fish, that a desire had seized me to capture and taste of them. Our first excursion, or rather incursion, was made sim- ply and solely as a voyage of discovery. Our only sure guide to the spot was the fact that some two miles up the prairie ran, or perhaps as often stood, a " bayou," which crossed it on its way to the river, and three miles below us was a " marais" or slough, which, according to my friend Joe's account, changed into a " branch :" then after run- ning through a cypress brake or two, ultimately assumed the form of a palmetto swamp, and in that guise joined BCYLLA AND CHARYBDIS. 57 the river. Now these two land, or rather water-marks, gradually converged, and at last nearly met, so that all we had to do was to keep the " bayou" upon the right hand, and the swamp upon the- left a modern version of Scylla and Charybdis and with the aid of patience, a huge hack-knife, Joe's woodcraft, and extreme good luck, we might, barring accidents, and the over-clouding of the sun, finally hope to attain the point proposed. There was, to be sure, a kind of path rather a mytho- logical affair supposed to have been originally marked out by some ancient party of surveyors partly kept open by cattle where the thicket was not very dense, and occasionally in other parts by such of the " varmint''' as could crawl through the cane and under the briers, so that now and then a remnant was visible ; but as both ends were totally blotted out from existence, and only a few marks of where it had been, remained, it. was, if anything, rather worse than useless. The first part of our journey was effected on horseback ; but after proceeding some half a mile into the " timber," this mode of progression was suddenly brought to a period by the dense undergrowth, and we were reduced to a very natural and primitive style of locomotion. This spot had been aptly named the " big thicket." Immense bamboo briers, like vegetable Pythons, twined and intertwined, crossed and recrossed, from tree to tree, and shrub to shrub, forming a natural trellis-work for the thousand and one wild and beautiful vines that abounded there. The "passion vine," with its singular flower and luscious fruit ; the cypress vine, with its daz- zling gem-like blossoms, whose form is said to have sug- gested the pentagonal star of the Texan flag ; the morn- 3* 58 THE AUTHOR " IN A FIX." ing-glory trebling in size and beauty the stunted dwarfish thing found in our northern gardens, and an immea- surable host of others of minor importance, clung to them. Above our heads the gigantic wax-like blossoms of the magnificent magnolia grandiflora shed a perfume rivalling that of the lotus, while from the branches of every tree, the trumpet-creeper, the parasite par excellence of the vegetable kingdom, suspended her crimson coniform cups. Birds of showy plumage and joyous voice the dandy paroquet the log-cock with his gaudy head-dress the dusky mocking-bird, whose imitative but inimitable song more than compensates for his Quaker attire were flit- ting to and fro, hopping from twig to twig so careless and unconcerned, that it was evident they were seldom annoyed with a visit from the fell destroyer, man. We had now to contend for every step we gained ; knife and hatchet were in constant requisition, and for one hour we pressed on in Indian file as fast as we could. Joe now announced the discovery of a tree, which we recognised as one that grew near to the neglected trail, and towards it we made our way. On reaching it, we found it truly near something that might have been a trail, or might have been a rabbit-path, and which led us in a few minutes into a cane-brake, where the rank cane grew in wild luxu- nance, thick, according to Joe, as " the hars on a dog." Joe said, " he allowed this wouldn't pay for powder," for we had certainly stumbled into the slough which formed our southern boundary and so off we started in an oppo- site direction. Unfortunately, while following our trail, the sun had become obscured ; and we had been so busy cutting our way, and keeping in the path, that we had BEAUTIES OP A CYPRESS-BE AKE. 59 neglected to take an observation of the prominent trees ahead of us. The backwoodsman's compass the black and rough bark upon the north side of trees failed to assist us, for so thoroughly defended were they by the dense thicket, that the bitter northers seemed to have produced no effect upon them. Under these circumstances, it was perhaps not in the least surprising that, after floundering about awhile in the bush, we found ourselves in an immense and gloomy cypress-brake. Reader, did you ever see a cypress-brake ? If not, you have yet one nameless horror to experience your first emo- tion upon beholding one. The brake is always upon low ground, or rather in a swale, which, during the rainy sea- son, is filled with water ; but the one into which we had stumbled was perfectly dry, excepting here and there a pud- dle, containing rather more mud than water, and densely populated with that most vile of reptiles, the moccasin snake great numbers of which had congregated there. The ground was -perfectly bare, fibrous, and free from anything like grass or vegetation, save an occasional cluster of rank and noxious vines, of a sickening, deadly green. From this drear abode arose the trunk of many a huge cypress, shooting up its straight and living shaft far, far above our heads, seeming almost to pierce the clouds, and at a great height outstretching its sp'ectral arms, shrouded and draped with the fatal " hanging moss," which lives, and feeds, and thrives only upon malaria and vapor of the most deadly kind. No settler builds his cabin near the spot where its sombre curtain is seen wav- ing to and fro, but he shuns it as being a sure token of the presence of pestilence and death. 60 THE AUTHOR " IN A FIX." Around the foot of each tree are standing a number of those singular conical-shaped shoots, termed needles, resembling so many grave-stones, and slowly crawling among them, or lying stupid and sullen, with its mouth wide agape, is ever found the filthy moccasin. No token gives he of his presence like the tocsin of the chivalrous rattlesnake ; but, should you approach too near, you would soon feel his venomous fangs, more fatal even than those of the latter. He is the most hateful of his hateful kind, a truculent coward, and never, save in one solitary instance, have I known one to offer an attack, or to notice one in any other manner than by slinking hissingly away. To my surprise, Joe seemed quite satisfied that we had fallen in with the swamp. His reasons, however, were good : " For," said he, " this is either a part of the slough and, if so, must be near the river or it joins the bayou, and if this be the case, we cannot be far from it either, because the slough and the bayou do not approach each other until near it," Out of the brake we scrambled, intending to make our way between the two obstacles, but we had not proceeded far when the sun made his appearance, shining, to my astonishment, not in our faces, but upon our backs. Joe, however, nothing daunted, took it very quietly, merely muttering something about having taken a " back-track," and then wheeling about, with the sun for his pilot, guided me directly to the river. A more beautiful stream never gladdened my eyes ; run- ning over a bed of pebble and rock, between shelving banks of glistening sand, white as the unsullied siiow- flake, it resembled rather one of our pure and joyous JOE ON SUNDAY FISHING. 61 northern waters, than anything of the kind I had before seen in the south. In a deep pool immediately beneath the overhanging bank upon which I was standing, however, a half grown alligator, floating lazily upon the surface, and the occa- sional flash of the fins and tail of that shark of the fresh water the gar assured me of the southern locality. Strong was the temptation to cast a line into the blue depths below, but alas ! the means and appliances were wanting. The day was Sunday, and Joe, albeit far from a bigot, was a very aristocrat in his feelings, and had put a decided veto upon taking with us any tackle for fish- ing. " He was not," he said, " sot up about Sunday, but huntin' and fishin 7 on that day wer clar nigger, and went agin him ;" and so I dropped the subject. After strolling down stream and selecting an eligible spot for our camp, we returned ; and, although we lost our way again which, by the by, we never after failed of doing, either in going in or in coming out of the brake yet, at length arriving safely at the place where our horses were tied up, we mounted them, and soon reached home. During the evening I thought of nothing but the fish ; my dreams that night were full of them, and I awoke next morning with the full and fixed determination, that come what might, that day would I cast my line into the crystal waters of the San Jacinto. Joe, for a wonder, had something to do, and after ad- vising me to abandon the idea of visiting the river alone, finally submitted, saying that there was nothing like learning, after all, and giving me the best advice and 62 THE AUTHOR " IN A FIX." direction in his power, bade me God speed, in his own rough fashion. At an early hour of a bright morning did I set forth upon my mad-cap expedition, and after some three or four hours of vigorous exertion, found myself, heaven knows where. The thicket seemed to grow more dense at every step, until at last I reached something that resembled a new-made path. The thick tall cane had been trampled and crushed, so that for a time I made famous headway. As I was pressing onward, a rattling of cane caught my ear, and peering into the thicket, I saw something that I was convinced at a glance must be either a clergyman, a chimney-sweep, or a bear, and as there was not the slightest probability of either of the former gentry being in such a latitude, I conjectured, and rightly, that it must be no less a personage than Sir Bruin himself. At the identical moment when I made the discovery, my sable-coated friend had also ascertained my proximity, and not knowing but that I might be fair game for him, wheeled in his track and returned. Totally unarmed, save a large hack-knife, I stepped aside to a huge tree, and placing my back against it, awaited his coming. It was but a moment ; the cane parted, and there he stood, but stood not long. I have before in my life made some noise, yet it was surely but as silence, when compared to the yell with which I greeted him. Which of us was the more alarmed I know not, but the victory was with me. Bruin retreated without tap of drum, and, with a snort resembling that of a plethoric specimen of the porcine genus in a state of excessive alarm, abandoned the field. My joy at his departure was much increased by the dis NOT A MERRY-GO-ROUND. 63 covery that the tree where I was standing, was upon the bank of the bayou, which I now determined to keep in sight until the end and aim of my journey was attained. In a few minutes I fell in with a path newly cut in the dense cane, and pressed onward with renewed vigor. Presently I came to a tree which bore so striking a resemblance to the one which stood upon the scene of the bear's stampede, that I paused to look at it, but remem- bering that it was no phenomenon to find, two trees similar to each other in the forest, I resumed my course. After the lapse of a short interval, I passed a third, then a fourth, and finally a fifth tree, all alike, and for the first time, the many tales I had heard of lost travellers moving round and round in a circle, from which there seemed no escape, flashed upon my mind. But no, this might not be ; I had kept the banks of the bayou upon my right, and must now be going down stream. However, for my satisfaction, I determined to mark the tree with a " blaze," did so, and went on. In a short time my vegetable " old man of the sea " again hove in sight, and upon examination there was the " blaze " I had so lately cut. It was perfectly inexplicable. Had I gone mad ? Was this some illusion of the senses? I thought, and with a shudder, of a certain old, withered, parchment-faced Afri- can negres-s, a privileged character in Joe's settlement, whose hitherto undisputed claims io the possession of magic power I had seen tit to call in question and ridicule only the previous evening, to the manifest alarm of the listeners. A moment's reflection, however, banished all this, and laughing at my singular situation, I determined, coute qui 64 THE AUTHOR " IN A FIX." coute, to escape from this modern labyrinth. Down the precipitate banks of the bayou I dashed, and made my way, now upon one side of the nearly dried up stream, now upon the other, and now through the shallow water in its bed. Once more and for the last time my tree was seen, and the mystery was solved. It appears that I had stumbled upon a peninsula formed by the bayou's doubling upon itself. The entrance was but a step from bank to bank, and my chance of finding the way out by the same isthmus was smaYl indeed. By the time I reached the river, the sun was declining, and threatening clouds warned me to make the best of my way homeward. Without experiencing any serious mis- hap, save my reaching the prairie, three miles above the proper place, I arrived in safety, perfectly satisfied with my exploit, and willing in future to wait Joe's motions. CHAPTER VI. HOW I CAUGHT A " CAT," AND WHAT I DID WITH IT. AT last behold us fairly located upon the banks of the river, where Joe had selected a fine, hard shingle beach upon which to pitch our camp. This same camp was an extemporaneous affair, a kind of al fresco home, formed by setting up a few crotches to sustain a rude roof of un- dressed shingles, manufactured impromptu, there known as " boards," supported upon diminutive rafters of cane. This done, a cypress suitable for a canoe, or " dug out," was selected, and in two days shaped, hollowed out, and launched. Fairly embarked now in the business, I found but little difficulty in obtaining a supply of green trout and other kinds of river fish, but the huge " Cats" where were they ? I fished at early morn and dewy eve, ere the light had faded out from the stars of morning, and after dame Nature had donned her robe de nuit, all was vain. Joe counselled patience, and hinted that the larger species of " Cats" never ran but during a rise or fall in the river, and must then be fished for at night. One morning, heavy clouds in the north, and the sound of distant thunder, informed us that a storm was in progress near the head waters of our stream. My rude tackle was looked after, and bait prepared in anticipation of the pro- mised fish, which the perturbed waters of the river were to incite to motion. Night came, and I left for a spot where I knew the Cats 66 HOW I CAUGHT A " CAT." must frequent; a deep dark hole, immediately above a sedgy flat. My patience and perseverance at length met with their reward. I felt something very carefully examin- ing the bait, and at last tired of waiting for the bite, struck with force. I had him, a huge fellow too ; backwards and forwards he dashed, up and down, in and out. No fancy tackle was mine, but plain and trustworthy, at least so I fondly imagined. At last I trailed the gentleman upon the sedge, and was upon the eve of wading in and securing him, when a splash in the water which threw it in every direction, announced that something new had turned up, and away went I, hook, and line, into the black hole below. At this moment my tackle parted, the robber whether alligator or gar I knew not disappeared with my half captured prey, and I crawled out upon the bank in a blessed humor. My fishing was finished for the evening ; but repairing the tackle as best I could, casting the line again into the pool, and fixing the pole firmly in the knot-hole of a fallen tree, I abandoned it, to fish upon its own hook. When I arose in the morning, a cold " norther" was blowing fiercely, and the river had risen in the world during the night. The log to which my pole had formed a temporary attachment, had taken its departure for parts unknown, and was in all human probability at that moment engaged in making an experimental voyage on account of " whom it may concern." The keen eyes of Joe, who had been peering up and down the river, however, discovered something upon the opposite side that bore a strong resemblance to the missing pole, and when the sun had fairly risen, we found that A SELF-FISHING POLE. 67 there it surely was, and moreover its bowing to the water's edge, and subsequent straightening up, gave proof that a fish was fast to the line. The northern blast blew shrill and cold, and the ordi- narily gentle current of the river was now a mad torrent, lashing the banks in its fury, and foaming over the rocks and trees that obstructed its increased volume. Joe and I looked despairingly at each other, and shook our heads in silence and in sorrow. Yet there was the pole waving to and fro, at times when the fish would repeat his efforts to escape it was worse than the Cup of Tantalus, and after bearing it as long as I could, I prepared for a plunge into the maddened stream. One plunge, however, quite satisfied me ; I was thrown back upon the shore, cold and dispirited. During the entire day there stood, or swung to and fro, the wretched pole, now upright as an orderly serjeant, now bending down and kissing the waters at its feet. The sight I bore until flesh and blood could no more endure. The sun had sunk to rest, the twilight was fading away, and the stars were beginning to peep out from their sheltering places inquiringly, as if to know why the night came not on, when I, stung to the soul, determined at any hazard to dare the venture. Wringing the hand of Joe, who shook his head dubi- ously, up the stream I bent my course until I reached a point some distance above, from which the current passing, dashed with violence against the bank, and shot directly over to the very spot where waved and wagged my wretched rod, cribbed by the waters, and cabined and confined among the logs. I plunged in, and swift as arrow from the bow, the 68 HOW I CAUGHT A " CAT." water hurried me on, a companion to its mad career. The point was almost gained, when a shout from Joe called my attention to the pole : alas, the fish was gone, and the line was streaming out in the fierce wind. That night was I avenged ; a huge cat was borne home in triumph. How I took it, or where, it matters not ; for so much time having been occupied in narrating how I did not, I can spare no more to tell how I did. The next point was to decide as to the cooking of him. Joe advised a barbacue ; " a fine fellow like that," he said, " with two inches of clear fat upon his back-bone, would make a noble feast." Let not the " two inches of clear fat" startle the incredulous reader, for in that country of lean swine, I have often heard that the catfish are used to fry bacon in. But to the cooking, We cooked him that night, and we cooked him next day, And we cooked him in vain until both passed away. He would not be cooked, and was in fact much worse, and not half so honest as a worthy old gander once pur- chased by a very innocent friend of mine that was found to contain in its maw a paper embracing both his genea- logy and directions with reference to the advisable mode of preparing him for the table ; of which all that I remember is, that parboiling for sixteen days was warmly recommended as an initial step. Sixteen days' parboiling I am convinced would but have rendered our friend the tougher. We tried him over a hot fire, and a slow one, we smoked him, singed him, and in fine tried all known methods in vain, and finally consigned him again uneaten, to the waters. CHAPTER VII. THE RIVER CAMP. THE location of our camp upon the river was very roman- tic, if the purpose to which it was devoted was not ; and for solitude, it might have suited Zimmerman himself. The banks of the river were quite high, but did not rise at once or precipitously, bearing no resemblance to the bold bluff shores that confine nearly all southern rivers, and invariably impart a desolate and lonesome feeling to the traveller ; seeming, as it were, to shut him out from the world by some new Chinese wall. The banks of the Upper San Jacinto, on the contrary, rise terrace upon terrace, one above and behind another, covered with a thousand varieties of luxuriant plants and flowers, and might compare favorably with the hanging gardens of the East. Above, upon the height, towered immense trees, indicating in their varieties the nature of the soil that gave them birth and fostered them. Here a grove of majestic magnolias, that pierced the clouds with their heaven-aspiring shafts, announced the presence of a warm, sandy loam ; there the funereal cypress, spreading widely and boldly its skeleton arms abroad, draped with festoons of the deadly moss, told that its roots were imbedded in some moist swale or brake, at once the home of the moccasin and rattlesnake, and the pasture of the wild bee, who distils honey from the rank and noisome weeds that flourish, and the creaming pools 70 THE RIVER CAMP. of stagnant water that abound there, and finds a home in the vacant heart of some aged giant of the woods. Fur- ther down, a number of tall pines exhibited their dark green pyramids in bold relief against the clear sky, and spoke of the barrenness of the land ; while opposite, the luxuriant growth of cane, and the wild peach, announced, in a language very intelligible to the land hunter, inexhausti- ble treasures beneath their feet. As far as the river was visible to us, the different varieties of trees bent their tops from the main bank, as if saluting the fair stream that was carelessly straying beneath their feet. Our camp was located in a bend, where the river spread out into a mimic bay. Some quarter of a mile above us it suddenly burst upon the sight, as seemingly in a great hurry it turned a very short corner ; but perhaps finding that it had chanced upon a spot that was passing fair, or for some other reason not half as good, forgetting its haste, it moved along more gently, dallying with the banks, and scooping out a deep place where it turned around for awhile for all the world like a kitten chasing its tail, and then, as if tired of its fun, or catching sight of our camp ashamed, like some grave people, of being caught engaged in a frolic, it spread itself out, and strolled by us with its hands in its pockets, and in a very majestic and dignified manner. A few rods more, and a new idea entering its brain, or desirous of making up for lost time, off it hurried again at top speed, in a shallow way, but enjoying the best of spirits, kicking up quite a dust among the pebbles at its feet, as it rolled them merrily along, bringing the poor little fish that were endeavoring to get up in the world, to a stand-still they, wagging their tails, and wondering what the deuce was the matter OUR FOREST HOME. 71 now ; and finally changing the merry roundelay that it had been gaily trolling into a loud, boisterous, brawling song, it dashed around another corner in a prodigious fury, breaking its head against a troublesome ledge of rocks that were lying in ambush on purpose to play it this scaly trick. It was now entirely lost to sight, but could be heard for quite a distance as it pursued its noisy way, evidently in anything but the best of tempers, and raising its voice, now hoarse and quarrelsome, in bitter complaint of the ill treatment that it had received. In the exact centre of the aforesaid bend, a very pretty piece of sedge that skirted the shore in the form of a crescent, united the water and the land ; and immediately in its rear, but perhaps not more than one foot higher than the river, extended a broad platform of hard sand, white as the snow from heaven, and sparkling like frost gems upon a winter night. Some fifteen feet again above this, and joined to it by a gradual and easy slope, was another flat of similar material, forming a small but per- fect piece of tableland. Upon the latter did we pitch our tent in the wilderness. Being in great haste to catch my catfish, I dismissed the very important matter of the construction of our forest home in an exceedingly summary and contemptuous man- ner, and one entirely unworthy so important an event. To retrace my footsteps : We arrived at the river, and selected our building spot about 2 P.M., and Joe immedi- ately announced that, if we did not intend to use the sky for a Blanket, and did intend to sleep like white folks, we had better be stirring at once. I looked around rather troubled, not seeing anything to stir, and moreover not being particularly burdened with 72 THE RIVER CAMP. any great skill in woodcraft as yet, and felt quite uncer- tain as to how we were to complete a building suitable to contain " white folks " before the already declining sun should have gently edged himself out of sight behind the lofty tree tops. Consoling myself, however, with the reflection that Joe was truly wide awake in the woods, however fully his somnolent propensities might have been developed in the settlement, I concluded to place full reliance upon his tact and sagacity, and to obey his orders if convenient and satisfactory, which was, perhaps, the wisest course I could have pursued, especially as I could not help myself. By his directions, I went to work at fire-building, and was to cook our rude meal, while he should search a cypress brake at a short distance down stream, until he might discover a tree that would answer the double pur- pose of boat-building and shingle-making ; and when one should have been found, f was to be informed of his suc- cess by one of his peculiar "yips," which would also answer a double purpose keep up my spirits, and show me where I should direct my more feeble and unpractised voice when the pork, potatoes, and coffee were prepared. Joe must on that day have been in high favor with the fickle goddess, for scarcely had the faint flame flashed up from among the crackling sticks, when a yell was heard, to which the roar of a bull was but as a gentle whisper, and the screech-owl's note but as the song of the nightingale. I stood transfixed for a moment, until old Echo, having taken up the cry and bandied it from shore to shore, finally carried it afar off, and lost it in the dim distance, and then I tried my voice at a reply. It would not seem that my attempt at rivalry was crowned with any distin- A HORSE-CHUCKLE PORK AXD POTATOES. 73 guislied success, for I beard a very distinct rumbling away in Joe's direction, which, if there be any inferior denomination of the horse laugh, known as the horse chuckle, would certainly have come up to my idea of one. It sounded like a bear suffering under a severe dispensa- tion of bronchitis. Abandoning all idea of excelling Joe's performance as " the yett-er" flower of the forest, I went to work in the culinary department in good earnest, but ere the faint odor from the frying pork pervaded the atmosphere, causing the " varmint " that inhaled it to wonder what new celestial perfume had visited their " diggins," and inflicting the cruel pangs of a severe appetite, and nothing at hand to remedy it, upon any stray wolf that chanced to be within a mile, the ponderous ring of Joe's well applied axe astonishing the old woods for the first time told that he had commenced operations in a determined man- ner. As the fresh and grateful air of the river fanned my brow, moist from the unwonted occupation in which I was engaged, a thought occurred to me that it was now my time to smile ; that Joe was getting the worst of it, and that I should not be compelled to make my debut with an axe for that day at least. The pork was at last fried to a turn, and safely depo- sited in an old tin pan that served us for table, dishes, and all ; a batter of corn meal and water had taken the pork's place in the frying-pan, and was converted into very respectable something I cannot stop to invent a name ; the delicious aroma of coffee filled the air with fragrance, and the nicely roasted sweet potatoes were prepared for the table in imitation of the celebrated roots of Marion ; all was ready, and this time Joe did not scorn my cry. 4 V4 THE RIVER CAMP. Reader, did you ever eat a dinner in the wild woods? I do not mean one of those miserable counterfeits known as " pic-nics," consisting of city delicacies for sated appe- tites, but a true, rude, yet appetizing meal, far away from the demoralizing influence of French cookery, and served up with the most potent of sauces a genuine woodsman's unaffected hunger. If you have, you would have given a month of Delmonico's delicacies for a few minutes' chance at the rude but cheerful board, although the said board was but a tin pan after all. A hearty drink of cool and excellent water from the river beneath us, and two stone pipes, with handles of young cane, were produced from our respective pockets, and soon in full operation. The serious business of discussing dinner and a dessert of pipe-smoke being duly concluded, I thought it time to descend to more trivial matters, and inquire of Joe if the work went bravely on. " Well, Joe," said I, " from the style of attack you have kept up on that unfortunate tree, I reckon you don't need much of my help to get it down." "Don't, eh?" replied Joe. "Well, if you allow that I can lay out a cypress four feet thick as high up as I can chop, in half an hour, you must put me up as some punkins. No, sir, thar's a good hour's work for both, and we'd bet- ter be at it." So at it we went, and after due time, the outlay of much misapplied exertion, and at the expense of a pair of severely blistered hands upon my part, down came the huge tree with a thundering crash, frightening many a bird and beast, to say nothing of the prodigious alarm it must have caused among the large fraternity of snakes OUE SHED-OVEK A " CHEF D ? (EUVRE." 75 that inhabited the brake, and that probably took the unusual noise and commotion for little less than an earth- quake. Actively plying now the cross-cut saw, we severed from the trunk a proper log for the construction of our boat, and then took off several blocks, wherewith to manufacture the requisite covering for our rustic mansion. We rolled the latter to our camp, and soon split them in parts ready for the riving iron or " frow," and then procured ten crotches of proper length, and fixed them firmly in their places. The two centre sticks were longer than the rest ; in front of these we placed four in pairs opposite each other, while for the rear support, we cut them much shorter, allowing the last pair to project but little from the ground. We then cut stout straight poles, and placed them in the crotches, and across these again a quantity of green cane from the adjacent brake to form our roof timbers. Half an hour.'s work now furnished us with a supply of boards, as undressed shingles are called, and beheld our house completed and ready to receive us before night. Of course this, like all other new buildings, required some additions and alterations ; for instance, on the north side we afterwards appended a shed, which sloped to the ground, had a large hole in the roof, and answered as a kitchen in wet weather. This and one or two minor improvements completed a hut that perhaps would not have been much protection from the severities of a more northern climate, but was just the thing for us, and per- fectly ^weather-proof as far as rain was concerned. Immediately "opposite, grew a great number of fine cypress trees, which we felled as we needed, and found but little difficulty in getting the raw material to our 76 THE RIVER CAMP. camp. Cut in proper lengths, we rolled them down and floated them over, to be piled up in front of our work- shop. In the beginning, we made a few experiments at shingle- making in the " timber," but soon found that it would not pay, for the musquitoes, that did not at all affect our hard sand beach, swarmed in countless myriads in the swamp, and could only be kept at a respectable distance by build- ing fires about us and working in an atmosphere of smoke. We therefore deemed it advisable to do our finishing work in the camp above, and soon a noble pile of shingles arose behind it witnesses of our industry. Joe estimated their number every night, and calculated to a fraction something in the style of the milkmaid in the spelling-book the exact amount of necessaries and luxuries into which they could be converted when once boated and rafted to Galveston. It may seem strange that Joe, owning as he did a fine herd of cattle and a sufficient clearing, should resort to labor which was evidently not homogeneous to his disposi- tion, in order to procure a little money, or a few pounds of coffee or tobacco, powder or lead. As is the case with all new countries, there was no cur- rency ; literally, no money. The republic has been flooded with countless government bills, some of them issued and passed at seven dollars for one, and at the time of which I write, not of the slightest use, except, perhaps, to light a pipe with. Among the limited number of planters that then raised cotton, a little money was sometimes to be found, if their store bill did not overrun their crops ; but with the stock- raisers who occupied all the prairie-coast country, not one LOCOMOTIVE CURRENCY. 77 in ten could boast of a dollar. Their circulating medium possessed locomotive powers, and circulated upon its own legs. It consisted simply and solely of cows and calves. "We have all heard of riches taking wings to themselves and flying away. Their wealth often walked off upon four feet, and when most needed, was very apt to turn up missing. A cow and calf always passed current as ten dollars, and BO was it understood in all transactions. If a man were asked the price of his horse and he should reply " Fifty dollars," he would mean five cows and calves, and nothing else. A note for so many dollars implied only a certain number of quadrupeds, and unless a money form of pay- ment had been particularly specified, it could not be col- lected even by law. Now, cows and calves are very useful things in their way when not in your way. They look very pretty upon a green prairie, and appear to great advantage, if skilfully depicted, in a fair landscape ; they are also indispensable necessities in the milk, butter, and cheese department ; but when it comes to travelling about with a dozen or so in one's pocket, and shelling out a calf for a pair of shoes, or asking a man to take his change out of a cow for a tavern bill, the thing is quite preposterous. The man who has to travel fifty miles to procure his little luxuries, would be puzzled to drive a few cattle every time he went ; nothing but a large herd could be driven, and then, with a number of men, it would be slow business. More than all, the merchants would not acknowledge the currency as legal tender, or receive anything in payment for their high-priced articles, but what they could turn into money, wherewith to pay their debts, and refill their exhausted shelves and empty barrels. 78 . THE RIVER CAMP. It therefore must appear to the most careless observer, that although there was no want of this kind of stock in the land, yet it could scarcely be ranked among the " con- vertibles." There was, to be sure, a business house at Brazoria that issued small bills, from twelve and a half cents upwards ; there was also another at Galveston ; and again, the Government had put forth a few exchange notes that were at par, but all of them small enough in the aggre- gate could only be obtained by money itself, or its equi- valent. Congress indeed undertook to legislate the difficulty out of existence in their own peculiar way. A bill was intro- duced to establish a Government Bank, which was to loan money upon all fields of growing cotton. Had this plan succeeded, it is probable that each legislator would have abandoned his post almost instanter, rushed home, set to work every negro that he could hire or purchase upon credit, and, having planted as many acres as possible, have posted up to the bank immediately for his share of the spoils. The bill was in direct violation of the Constitution, which prohibits banks in toto, and as the Congress was then in session at Houston, where a mercantile community might have rewarded so high-handed a piece of business on the spot, and even upon the honorable person of the projector, it was deemed advisable to discuss the matter in secret session and with closed doors. One of the Senators, however, who either had too much liquor in his head, or honesty in his heart, to keep the secret, left the State-house and addfessed the people upon the subject. Congress deprived him of his seat and dis- HONEST BOB VICTORIOUS. 79 missed him from the Senate, but a new election being held immediately, he was reinstated ; carried by acclamation, and absolutely borne upon the shoulders of his friends, he was ushered into the Senate accompanied by a shouting crowd. Congress took the hint, and neither prosecuted the bill nor persecuted their Senator any further. The hero of this event was known and is yet, if he be alive as Honest Bob, and upon the strength of this title ran for the Presidency, and received, I believe one vote. The hides of slaughtered beeves and they amounted to a goodly number in the course of a year, for economy of meat is by no means one of the stock-raiser's virtues were cash articles ; these, with a few hard and miserable cheeses, were all that a very large class of settlers had to depend upon, to secure those articles which they were forced to buy. A family of genuine Down-Easters, that had settled some twenty miles below, had tried their hands at shingle- making, and succeeded very well in a small way. They rafted their " plunder" some fifty miles down the river, and then shipped it upon trading vessels bound for Galveston, where it was disposed of at large prices. Joe, however, as I have previously stated, had other and more extended ideas. Having chanced to light upon the price of white oak staves in some old newspaper, he determined, as soon as a few dollars could be realized, to pave the way, that he would engage a large gang of hands and slaughter the old oaks .without stay or remorse. Well, go thy ways, Joe, for despite a crotchety brain, an unsteadiness of purpose, and a determined grasping after some ideal mode of easily acquiring wealth, a truer, 80 THE RIVER CAMP. more kindly, and more honest heart never beat in manly bosom. One great impediment to the successful prosecution of our business was the difficulty we experienced in keeping a supply of food on hand. Joe was for no half rations ; and the inexorable demand of an appetite, occasioned by our mode of life, made such severe requisitions upon our larder, that it required replenishing every week, and the exodus from, and return to, our forest home was rather a serious matter, generally with the time occupied in preparing provisions and seeing to home wants wast- ing two days. Joe was an early riser ; the sun never found him repos- ing upon the pile of shavings that formed his humble couch. I, however, could not so soon shake off my city- acquired bad habits, and so all the drudgery of making fire and preparing breakfast fell to the share of my compa- nion. One morning, as we were wending our way to the swamp, Joe stopped, and directed my attention to a small pile of half decayed twigs of the white birch. Upon its outer edge, and within a circumference no larger than the head of a hogshead, were coiled up five venomous- snakes, who had not yet aroused themselves and shaken off the torpor occasioned by the chill of night. Exactly in the centre was the mark of one of Joe's bare feet, where it had crushed through the rotten wood and made its print in the sand without alarming the sleepers. We made short work with them, and ever after Joe took the precaution of booting himself before making any more early excursions. CHAPTER VIII. STORIES BY THE CAMP FIRE. OUR nights by the camp fire were hours long to be remem- bered. Joe was a capital story-teller ; he believed tho- roughly in all the marvels that he narrated, while very common and ordinary events in the great world would appear to him incredible indeed. It was with him a realiza- tion of the story touching the old lady, her sailor son, and Pharaoh's chariot wheels. Lafitte and his piracies formed the great staple of his conversation ; and, stretched at full length before the blaz- ing logs, I have listened for hours, to his wonderful accounts, as much interested in the man and his stories, as ever the Caliph of the Arabian Nights was in his wife's narrations. Joe knew where a vast sum of Lafitte's money was buried. He had had the very spot, nay the identical tree, so accurately described to him, that there could not be the least doubt of his obtaining the treasure, if he could but find a proper assistant to accompany him. Not deeming that Joe will be a loser by any breach of confidence upon my part, I will impart the great secret to my readers. A few miles inland from the Gulf of Mexico, and con- nected with it by a narrow outlet, is a large strange lake, unfrequented and almost unexplored by man. It is known as Lake Mermentou, and receives into its sluggish bosom the waters of a filthy bayou, as muddy as itself. 4* 82 STOEIES BY THE CAMP FIRE. In the very centre of this lake and it is large enough to appear to good advantage upon our maps is a solitary island, and upon the centre of the solitary island grows a solitary tree. The tree is a peccan tree, and the island is -Peccan Island, and upon the island, and immediately ,imderneath this tree, is deposited according to Joe's belief a mint of money. It was hidden there by the pirate himself, who ascended the lake in a small boat, containing a chest of gold and gems, and manned by one person besides himself. They dug a deep pit beneath the solitary tree, and with many heathenish and blasphemous ceremonies, in which the devil is supposed to have borne a prominent part, depo- sited the treasure. Before filling up the pit, the pirate chief performed one ceremony more, which his aid had not calculated upon, and which was neither to be found upon the bills, nor included in the general orders for the day, but was probably suggested impromptu to Lafitte by Old Nick, who is supposed to have stood at his elbow aid- ing and abetting. When the heavy chest had been lowered down to its abiding place, Lafitte ordered his mortal assistant to jump down also, and stuff a quantity of canvas and oakum about the strong box, to protect it, it may be, from the dampness of the ground. When this duty had been care- fully performed, as the man arose and his head appeared once more above the surface, Lafitte, clapping a pistol to it, pulled trigger, blowing out what few brains were in it ? thus binding the owner to keep the peace and the secret for all time in a most effectual manner, and also filling up the cavity in an expeditious and an economical way. The man, of course, could not get out, but, according to THE SECRET BETRAYED. 83 the old saw, the murder and the secret did. Lafitte's tender conscience smote him so severely, that, while immersed in the slumbers of midnight, he gave a long and most particular account of the place and the transaction, and the thirsty ears of an old salt drank in the whole quite greedily. Nay, so scurvily did Somnus serve the sleeper, that he even divulged where lay snugly concealed a map of the lake, and also a paper containing directions as to the ceremony to be performed in disinterring the money. These valuable and authentic documents the old scamp purloined, and had actually exhibited them to Joe. He also offered his services to Joe to accompany him and con- duct the search ; but the latter, although fully possessed of the existence of the treasure, strange to say, entertained some doubts of honesty of purpose on the old sailor's part, and fearing to incur a fate similar to that of Lafitte's con- fidant, declined the transaction. Some time after, the sailor found a man who was willing to risk one of his negroes for a share in the spoils, and who furnished a small sum of money by way of outfit. The pair started upon their excursion, but were never after heard of, and Joe entertained no doubt but that the devil had caught them in the very act, and without a Bible to defend themselves with. I suggested the possibility of the sailor's using the money to run off the slave, and after- wards to dispose of him, but Joe scouted the idea. There was perhaps some foundation for Joe's piratical legend. Lafitte, who for many years had levied upon all flags but that of our country, had absolutely undisputed possession of the numerous bayous that, straggling off from the lower Mississippi, wind in every direction 84 STORIES BY THE CAMP FIRE. through southwestern Louisiana, and after forming a labyrinth of swamps, lakes, and streams, finally find their way to the gulf. These were the avenues up which the pirate chief transported his plunder, and disposed of it to the settlers living upon or near to the streams, and many fortunes were made by this nefarious commerce. Great quantities of various descriptions of merchandise found their way to New Orleans by the Mississippi, and were sold without question, if not without suspicion. So many persons had been engaged in this illegal traffic that they, with the refugees, at one time endeavored to stir up the state to an active resistance to the transfer of the country to the United States, and an ill feeling was engendered among the French that has not yet entirely subsided. On the western bank of the Mississippi, about one hun- dred and thirty miles above New Orleans, stands the little town of Plaquemine, which consists of a tavern, a ware- house, a store, and perhaps three or four more buildings. It is known from its race-track, where twice each year a few petty races are run ; and from its situation at the mouth of the very troublesome bayou Plaquemine, the key to all the great body of waters that wind through a large portion of western Louisiana. The water rushes in this aperture with great velocity, so great indeed that steamers descending the bayou are forced to run a number of miles stern foremost, and working against the stream with half a head of steam. After retrograding down the bayou in this manner for nine miles, they arrive at the " Devil's Elbow ;" and here, with their bows tied to the shore, the stern is hauled around by a hawser ; and, then descending some six miles A DAMP CLIMATE. 85 further " with a perfect rush," enter Grand Riviere, a huge lake-like body of water, doubtless once the old bed of the Mississippi, from four to six miles in width, and which connects with Bayou Atchafalaya, and a number of smaller streams. Steaming for some 40 miles through Grand River the mouth of Bayou C our tableau is reached. So narrow is this stream, that the tops of the old forest trees arch over it, and its navigation must be puzzling indeed to a tyro. From its conflux with Grand River to the head of naviga- tion, it runs through one immense forest or swamp, almost always under water, without a clearing or other sign of the presence of man, than two or three wood-piles and as many wood-cutters' shanties, elevated upon piles, each door adorned by a boat the only means of locomotion from the hut to the wood-yard for half the year. During the dry months the " pile" is recruited. At last, wearied to death with the gloomy and mono- tonous scenery, you emerge from the dark forest, and the little town of " Lafayette," the beginning of the prairie country, and the port of " Opelousas," a place of some im- portance^is before you. Here was one of Lafitte's trading stations, and the scene of one of Joe's most approved legends, in which I took an especial interest from my personal knowledge of the locali- ty, and acquaintance with one of the actors. Opelousas, the shire town of the parish of St. Landry, had and I believe yet has one inhabitant who is regarded with universal and superstitious awe by the others. She was a negress, a native of St. Domingo, a per- son doubtless of infinite cunning, and of education far supe- rior to that of many of the whites among whom she lived. 86 STORIES BY THE CAMP FIRE. Her name I have forgotten, but have had, years since, the honor of a personal interview with her. In fact,. hav- ing need of, I engaged her services, not with any satanic or diabolical intent, but simply to get up my linen, and must say that she proved to be a very superior person for her line of life and color, and also a most unexceptionable blanchisseuse. She appeared then to have been about forty years of age, but the Opelousans insisted upon it that she had seen twice as many summers. This woman could, according to universal report, pene- trate the walls of any prison and rescue its inmates, and it was generally believed that she had contrived a plan to carry off Xapoleon from the English, and that it was only prevented by his death. Ridiculous as this may seem, I have conversed with many who had placed implicit faith in it, and professed to the having been personally cognizant of her frequent inter- views with agents from France. It is much more proba- ble that they were agents of Lafitte, with whose affairs she evidently had much to do. Over the negroes she posseted unlimited power, and I have no doubt but that by the exercise of cunning, address, and a little gold, she has effected the escape of more than one criminal. One case in particular occurs to me. A wealthy planter lay confined in prison under sentence of death, for the crime of murder. At that time the cholera was raging, and it was soon re- ported that the condemned man had fallen a victim to the disease. Those who saw the corpse professed themselves satisfied with its identity, but few indeed had enough of courage and curiosity combined, to venture upon the spectacle. A year or two after the planter's supposed death, it was THE BITTER CUESE. 87 reported that lie had been seen by several who knew him. They had met him upon the upper Mississippi. Of course the negress received the credit of the affair, and it is not impossible but she might have either substituted a corpse for him, with the connivance of the jailor, or else produced a counterfeit presentment of death upon his part, sufficient to deceive those who were paid to be deceived. It is certain that the body was given up immediately to his family. According to Joe, a certain Frenchman had acquired an immense fortune by his transactions with Lafitte. One day, among a certain number of bales received by him, was one which bore the mark of a bloody female hand. This the negress happened to see, and for some unknown reason, it excited her utmost ire. Whether it was that she was really tender-hearted after all, and had issued her commands against the shedding of blood, or whether she entertained a private pique against the merchant, is not known ; but upon seeing the bloody impress on the bale, she knelt down with bare head, a midday sun beating down upon it, and cursed the recipient of evil gains with a most bitter curse. She cursed him, and prayed in an awful manner that the lightning might at a stroke blast all of his ill-gained wealth. As his possessions were somewhat widely scattered, the merchant felt inclined to scoff at her curses, and indulged in the idea that it would be somewhat dif- ficult for one thunderbolt to destroy all of his for- tune Years rolled on, and the trader settled down into a merchant, forgot the prediction, and built an immense store and warehouse upon the banks of the bayou, and 88 STORIES BY THE CAMP FIRE. on the very spot where lay the bloody bale, and where knelt the. negress. His buildings were just completed, the warehouse was filled with cotton that he had purchased, and the store groaned under the weight of the largest stock of goods ever brought to the prairie. The last blow of the carpenter's hammer was struck upon the building, and the last case of goods from the steamboat before the door, had been rolled in. It was just noon, the sky clear and without a cloud, and the owner, his friends, and the workmen, were sitting down to partake of a little dinner, expressly got up to " warm the store," when a deafening noise was heard, and in a few moments store and warehouse were on fire in every part. Every effort to subdue the flames was unavailing, and the owner was reduced by one blow from wealth to bankruptcy. Joe said it was evident that the lightning did not come from heaven, but quite the reverse, and argued therefrom, that the negress had power only over the things below. Time wore on, our pile of shingles began to assume quite an imposing aspect, and there is no telling how much we might have obtained for them, but that, just as we had almost completed as many as we had intended to raft, for our first essay, the near approach of a most important day the wedding day of one of Joe's sisters called us from pursuits in the green woods to a frolic at home. CHAPTER IX. A WEDDING AND A WOLF-HUNT. A NEW phase of frontier life and a scamper across the prairie on a half wild Spanish horse at break-neck speed, were quite welcome after our toil, and far more congenial to my feelings than felling trees, handling cross-cuts, roll- ing blocks, or even such a night-hunt as Joe had intro- duced me to. This was the first scene of the kind that I had ever wit- nessed ; it occurred in the days of my freshest verdure, and I enjoyed it to the fullest extent. Here let me drop a word of advice, en passant, to any and every one who may try his fortune in a new coun- try. Do not pretend to any knowledge that you do not possess. If everything appears new, and queer, and strange, say so. Ask as many questions as you please ; the more the better. You will find the backwoodsman not only willing, but happy to impart any information in his power, and he will take pleasure in showing you everything that may amuse and astonish you ; but for the man who would play the Indian, and refuse an expres- sion of either surprise or pleasure, small pains will be bestowed upon his edification. Some years since the Hough family resided in Louisiana, but finding the range for their cattle becoming every year worse, one of the sons-^our friend Joe set forth as a pioneer to explore, and locate himself upon the more fertile 90 A WEDDING AND A WOLF-HUXT. plains of Texas, taking with him his wife and children. Here, in the days of the patriarchs, he would have pitched his tent, but having no tent to pitch, or no taste for a life in tents, or being intent upon a more permanent mansion, he set to work, and with the friendly assistance of a few near neighbors, living not more than fifteen or twenty miles distant, put up a log cabin. A sturdy arm, a sharp axe, and a willing heart, require but few days to furnish the backwoodsman with a secure shelter. Joe had travelled in a covered wagon, which contained his small family, and small stock of furniture the latter pro- bably consisting of an old chest containing the family wardrobe, a coffee-pot, a few tin cups, a steel mill to grind his corn, a skillet to bake his bread in, with a few spoons, knives, forks, pans, and pails. His farming utensils were even fewer in number a plough, an axe, and hoe, perhaps nothing else. As for provisions, a supply of coffee and tobacco was indispensa- ble ; for everything else, except a little meal for immedi- ate use, he relied upon his stock of cattle, to sell or to kill. Having completed his cabin, he now made a small clearing in the adjoining woods where to raise the corn for his family's bread. The next year his brother came out ; the two lived and prospered. Their cattle grew in numbers. Before long, rumors of the fatness of the land reached the ears of the other members of the family, and out they trooped men, women, children, and negroes, horses and cattle, until Joe began to imagine the popula- tion too dense for health and comfort. In fact, he ci mi- plained bitterly to me, and expressed a determination of moving further, where he would have room to breathe, and the women could not quarrel about their chickens. A WET BRIDEGROOM. 91 This settlement, whose density of population distressed our friend Joe so much, consisted at this time of live families, and not over forty individuals of all hues, ages, and sexes. Cupid had found his way into the wilds, and tempted a young man to commit matrimony with one of the daughters of the family after a very curt court- ship, which was perhaps excusable, as the lover had to ride fifty miles every time he would visit his inamorata. Unfortunately for all who anticipated the fun and frolic usually incident to such affairs, death had been busy in the family but a short time previous, having with his remorse- less scythe clipped off its head and in consequence banjo and fiddle were tabooed, and dancing decidedly vetoed. On the wedding morning, the rain fell as it only falls in Texas, and the happy man, arriving drenched to the skin, was obliged to change his dress before he did his condi- tion. However, as he had ridden in homespun, and pre- served his best suit in his saddle-bags intact, he soon made his appearance decidedly renovated. If there was no dancing, there was plenty of feasting. The Houston stores had been laid under contribution, a host of fat things were spread before the assembled guests, and although I cannot affirm, as it is customary to do in simi- lar cases, that the tables groaned under their unwonted burden since, according to the very best information I have been able to obtain upon the subject, tables never do groan, but are basely slandered in this respect, yet they certainly creaked and to make up the deficiency, the majority of the guests groaned in concert before morning. The old lady seemed to have taken an exact measure of each one's capacity, and as long as she imagined a stray corner existed unoccupied, so long she continued to heap 92 A WEDDING AND A WOLF-HUNT. her luxuries upon the unfortunate proprietor's plate. In the evening songs and stories, nearly as broad as they were long, intimately mixed with whiskey and water, cir- culated among us, and long ere midnight the majority of the males at least, were in admirable condition for bed. A bed was prepared rather remarkable, for its longi- tude, as it extended the entire length of the porch, being formed simply by laying down a succession of blankets and counterpanes, with anything and everything stuck under the end for " heading" and upon this the males threw themselves down, each man using his own blanket, which no Texan travels without, for cover. The next morning all were astir betimes', and it certainly appeared to me that had the most of them entertained even a remote idea of the thirst they were to experience, they certainly would have taken a drop more before retir- ing. A wedding without anything of a frolic connected with it would have been deemed a species of sacrilege, and so, " faute de mieux," the wolf-hunt was declared the order of the day. Directly in front of the house, at a distance of four miles, is an " island of timber," known as Lake Island. It is one mile in length, and through it runs or stands, as the case may be, a narrow, shallow, and muddy strip of water. Four miles again beyond this, is another and a smaller " island," called from its usual inhabitants " Wolf Island." I would here beg the reader to remark, that in speaking of " Islands," clusters of trees are meant to be implied the same relative terms being applied to prairie and wood- land as we use in speaking of land and water a strip of prairie extending into the woods is known as a " Cove" A MUiiTLll CF THE FORCES. 93 or " Bay," while a projecting piece of wood is called a " Point" a cluster of trees, an " Island," &c. It appears that among the innumerable wolves that ravaged the prairie, one had acquired for herself a very unenviable notoriety, and had been long marked for destruction. Her size was great ; in fact, she was repre- sented as being a monster in her way. She had had the audacity to venture boldly into the cow-pens, and drive off all the dogs of the settlement except the old vete- ran, Bose, with whom she respectfully declined mea- suring her strength. Our plans were easily arranged, the caviarde of horses driven into the pen, and we were soon very busy catching and saddling each man paying particular attention to the fastenings of his girth, in the anticipation of a hard race over a hog-wallow prairie. Among the more prominent actors were our friend " Joe," his younger brother " Dave," mounted upon a fine blooded animal, and the brother-in-law, " Sam," who, being almost as much of a Johnny Newcome as myself, and considering himself " some punkins" in hunting, must needs bring his rifle into the field, for which he was well laughed at. The rest relied for offence and defence upon their long cow whips an implement consisting of a short eighteen inch handle, to which a very heavy lash from twelve to eighteen feet long is attached, and usually car- ried over the shoulder with the lash trailing upon the ground the " caberos" or hair rope, and, in cases of emergency, their stirrups, which, weighing from three to five pounds*; and easily unshipped, as a sailor would say, make very efficient instruments of destruction. All were ready, and, with a shout, off we started at a rattling pace ; but our ardor abating, after a burst of a 94 A WEDDING AND A WOLF-HUXT. mile, we cooled down to a steady trot. Bearing to the right of Lake' Island is a " marais" almost impassable in the wet season, but at this time in good order for travel- ling, and as we dashed into its high grass up started as fine a drove of deer as ever gladdened a hunter's eye. The sight was not lost upon our friend Sam, who, driving his rowels into the sides of his young horse, dashed off in hot pursuit. " Look out, Sam !" cried Joe, " look out ! that critter wont stand fire she'll give you fits directly." The caution came too late ; a shout of exultation from Sam had brought a fine buck to the right about, anxious, with all the curiosity of his kind, to know what in the world that unearthly noise might mean ; and ere he was satisfied, Sam was within range ; in an instant, without the least check of his horse's speed, the rifle was at his cheek, and off went the gun, Sam, and deer, "unanimous," as Mr. George Christy observes, "upon that last note." The buck evidently had the best of it. With his flag raised in triumph, he scoured over the prairie, throwing himself clear above the high grass at every jump. The rifle, the parent of all the mischief, lay reposing in quiet upon the ground, and Sam, well bruised, and almost stunned, flat upon his back, was holding on to one end of his "caberos," endeavoring to restrain his horse, who, fastened to the other, was prancing, snorting, and trying his best to escape his human anchor. A fall from a horse being too trivial a thing to occasion anything but a laugh at the expense of the fallen, without more ado we secured the animal, righted the man, and again bent our course to the Island. On arriving there I found it to be a cluster of trees cover- ing about two acres, with a heavy thicket of underbrush and an admirable place to shelter all kinds of " varmint. THE CHASE IS UP. 95 The best mounted men were selected to guard the Island, and if the wolf or wolves should break through our formi- dable pack of dogs, to cut them off from taking shelter in Lake Island. Dave and myself were posted without upon one side ; we had dismounted for a moment to tighten the girths, and I was just securing mine, when a shout from him brought me to saddle in an instant, and looking round I espied the identical wolf not more than one hundred yards ahead, making the best of her way across the prairie, and maintaining a running fight with " old Bose," while the rest of the pack of hounds and curs were scouring along after them as near as they might. We gave chase immediately. It was just noon, on an intensely hot day in the first part of September ; the ground we were riding over, of the description known as " hog- wallow," being a succession of . small mounds and corresponding hollows the wolf, gaunt and in fine run- ning order. In short, the chances were against us ; how- ever, off we dashed, shouting like madmen, Dave right on the trail of the wolf, and I striving to head her off from Lake Island. It was an animated scene the wolf right ahead, running side by side with " old Bose," and gaining ground every moment ; the space between us dotted with dogs of all colors and sizes, and scattered from us to the starting- ground, some twenty riders, every man of them making the best possible use of both lungs and spurs. Whether it was owing to the heat of the day, the rough- ness oP the ground, or the fact that the wolf was contend- ing for life, and we only for her skin, I know not, but in a heat of four miles she certainly beat us fairly over a quarter. 96 A WEDDING AND A WOLF-HUNT. Upon reaching Lake Island not only the old hound, but the smaller fry, abandoned all idea of the chase, and rush- ed indiscriminately into the water, whence they refused most doggedly to stir. They were completely done over and used up, and most of our horses in no better condi- tion. After beating the bush vainly for a while, we called a council of war, and determined to ride our reeking, pant- ing steeds homeward, procure fresh ones, and other dogs, and return again, feeling very sure that " Sir Isengrim" would not dream of leaving his quarters for some time, unless cavalierly ousted ; and that we should find him waiting us, stiffened with his morning's work, and in no condition to make the same " time" again. On our homeward route Dave and myself, to whom the escape of the wolf was imputed, caught it finely from all quarters. " Look heah, Dave, whar's the ' Jack ov Diniins' you war gwine to hunt on, that could give a wolf fits directly?" "I say, strarmger, that's a powerful smart lookin' chunk ov a poney you've got atwixt yer legs thar, bnt poneys is mighty oncertain." " Now, boys, jest cum out squr and say ef yer did run ater the varment, or if ye took a sorter skear and put out tother way." " I tell what is, boys," said a fourth, " yer all barkiu.' up the wrong tree. I smell a bug. Dave and that ar strannger's ondly play in' possum, an want to get a quarter race out on us, but they can't pull the wool over this child's eyes ; he's got 'em both skinned." " Shut up," replied Dave, " and let the stranger and me alone. Thar warnt one ov ye in half a mile ov the tail ov our horses. Ill dar ye now to run a race over that RECRUIT OP THE FORCES. 97 Eame hog-wallow, and anti ten cows and calves on ither the stranger er me, and I'll bet a plug ov tobacker I hev. a saddle cover off that varmint's back afore I camp down." On nearing the plantation we perceived a number of dark objects perched upon the fence, which at first I mis- took for buzzards, but they proved to be a general assort- ment of all the young negroes in the place, chattering like so many monkeys, their white eyes and teeth glistening in their setting of jet, who had assembled to get an early view of the " varmint" we had gone forth to do battle with. As soon as we arrived at the house, one of the young darkies was dispatched to the river with an invitation for a man who was there living to come up and bring all his pups ; two or three more were mounted, and sent into the prairie in search of the " caviarde" of horses and we went in to dinner. To use a very expressive Westernism, "Dave's tail was up," and every possible preparation was made to preclude a failure. The dogs that had returned were cared for, the very best cow horses (horses trained to cow hunting) selected, a complete and well digested plan of the cam- paign devised and explained. It was, however, thought that the difficulties of the chase had very much increased since morning. In the place of a small island that might be easily drawn, the wolf was now in a dense thicket a mile in length, with a stream of water in its midst, which the cunning old rascal might use to great advantage in washing his trail, and throwing the dogs off the scent. Four -o'clock found us all prepared for a start, and half an hour's sharp riding brought us to the hunting-ground. One person was now stationed at either end of the island, and one on either side, all of them at a sufficient distance 5 98 A WEDDING AND A WOLF-HUXT. from it to permit tlicir glance to take in everything from one outpost to another. We then commenced operations at the southern end, spreading ourselves entirely across the thicket, and forcing our way slowly and surely, keeping back the dogs ; and at the same time three of the party riding even with our line upon the outside. In this way we proceeded through the island, but no ' " sign" of wolf could we see. Our dogs started all sorts of strange game, but not the kind we were in search of. Dave was in despair. " The ' varmint's' gone home again/ 7 said he. " I rayther reckon not," replied Joe. " I rayther reckon not ; hit's clar agin the cunnin' of the varmint to think so. He's pretty much used up to begin with, and then he knows we're arter him, and you don't catch him showin' his profile in the perara tell dark, and ef thar's a bright moon he'll keep shady tell nigh sun up, and then he'll make a break. I tell you what, gentlemen, he's here, I'll bet a horse on that. The critter's ben in the lake, and jumped clar across the path into the bush, and thar he lies we've been within, a rod of him. Ef old Bose would get up and go to work we'd fetch him soon, but these dern no-account pups arn't worth shucks, and so we must do the tracking ; so, boys, let's light, some on us, and take it afoot, whilst the rest keep along on their critters." Joe's advice was taken ; he started off on the lead, and, strange to say, within ten rods of the spot where the con- sultation had been held stopped, and intimated by a very significant whistle that he saw " sign." Old hunter as Joe was he for once allowed himself to be thrown off his guard instead of passing quietly on, giving us " item" as he would have called it, and permit- THE ENEMY MAKES A SORTIE. 99 ting us to surround the beast, and make a sure thing of it : at the sight of the "footprints in the sand," he first whistled, then peeping into the bush, and espying tho much-sought-for " varmint," he allowed the exuberance of his joy to evaporate in a yell that would have aroused the dead. The wolf did not move, until Joe very imprudently seized a stick and poked it in her lair. Then with but one spring she dashed at her tormentor, who, slipping, fell backwards into the water ; and without waiting even to crawl out, gave us a succession of shouts that would have done honor to a Commanche. The wolf had evidently made up her mind that there was nothing left for her but a run for life, and, crossing the water, made for the open prairie but her situation was far from agreeable. Seen by three of the outposts, she was immediately headed off, and, turning, she had to encounter the party stationed on the edge of the island ; her speed was sensibly diminished, and her pursuers now felt sure of her. Keeping her right between them, they now forced her to a course parallel with the island, by which manoeuvre not only would our whole party be gathered, but she would be driven into the main prairie, without any chance of finding shelter, except by taking the back track, and from that they could easily cut her off. As they passed the end of the island the whole party fell in, and we all obeyed Dave's direction to the very letter. The chase headed down the prairie, running parallel with the wolf, and at a distance of a quarter of a mile on either side were three riders, while the rest, spread out widely, followed at about the same distance behind the dogs semi-distant between us thus forming three sides of a hollow square, with the wolf and dogs in the centre. 100 A WEDDING AND A WOLF-HUNT. Riding at half speed, and watching every motion of the animal, we now commenced drawing in, four or five riders leaving the back, and joining the side line, until we felt that we had her safe, and then Dave prepared to fulfil his pro- mise. Leaving the line, he took his " caberos" from the pommel of the saddle, passed it underneath his leg, then unfastening it, gathered it in a coil in his left hand, in which the bridle was also firmly grasped. In his right hand was the noose at the end of the rope. Rising in his stirrups, with an encouraging shout to his horse, he dashed directly at the wolf, who, now maddened with fear, rage, and pain, made a rush first on one side and then on the other, in hopes of escape, but giving up in despair, resumed her straightforward course. Dave approached behind, and driving the spurs into his horse's flanks, was soon parallel with her, and not more than twenty feet off. Giving the noose three or four twirls around his head, he launched it with the certainty of a bullet at the head of the animal, and without one instant's pause wheeled his horse. The rope ran out, and Sir Isengrim, jerked suddenly about from his headlong career, found himself heels in air, with a half-broken neck, dragged on his back at a rattling pace over the prairie. At this very moment the yell of a dog was heard, and " old Bose," lame, tired, half-dead as he was, running on two, three, or four legs by turns, -made his appearance, and dashing through the throng of his useless fellows, fastened upon the wolfs throat. Over and over they went together, Bose having all the fighting and biting to himself. THE HIDE IN DANGEE. 101 Dave checked his speed ; found the poor wolf past praying for ; and it was with difficulty that he could drive the dogs off, so as to redeem his promise, " that he would cover his saddle with that wolfs hide." CHAPTER X. MORE WATER THAN PLEASANT. THE wolf hunt had been conducted with so much spirit that a good deal more was required to finish out the night. Hosts and guests crowded the long piazza of the bride's house, and the stories and the bottle went round, until many heads imitated their example. The next morning the party was to break up, and Joe and I were to return to our thicket ; but I regret to say that Joe albeit on ordinary occasions a most staid and sedate personage had for once gone to bed in too merry a mood to feel much like work when he arose, and so another day was passed by us among the debris of the wed- ding. We were not the only loiterers. The third morning beheld us again in the thicket, and hard at work. The day was excessively warm, and the air very oppressive. Joe predicted thunder and heavy rain, and in the course of the afternoon dark clouds in the north, and distant thunder, gave warning that a storm was raging near the source of our little river. Joe shook his head, and wished that we might not get more water than pleasant, but consoled himself finally with the thought that we needed a foot more in the river for rafting purposes, and that the ground had become so dry that there was but little fear of a freshet. We had just finished our coffee, and were lighting our pipes, when a few heavy drops, pattering upon the roof, THE EIVER MAKES A " RAISE." 103 announced the arrival of the tempest. So well secured were we in our snug nook, that, but little fearing the weather, we built our camp-fire inside our hut, and smoked our pipes in quietness, looking forth upon the rain that now fell in sheets, on the torrents of water that poured down the banks, and the river rapidly swelling and grow- ing darker, rather as some scene got up for our enter- tainment than anything threatening us with misfortune or danger. Throwing a fresh log upon the fire, we lay down at our usual time, hugging our blankets closer around us as the blast whistled shriller, and enjoying that kind of quiet comfort every one experiences when safely housed from the bitter storm that seems fairly howling with rage at being disappointed of a victim. About midnight I awoke, and hearing an unwonted rushing noise, arose and went out of the camp. I walked to the end of the platform of sand without difficulty, but my first step from that, upon the descending ground plunged me half leg deep in swiftly running water. I withdrew immediately, having no desire of a cold bath in the dark, and hastening to the camp, awoke Joe, and rekindled the fire, so that it might throw a light across the river. The sight was an ugly one. The stream, usually about three feet deep, was now eighteen or twenty, and swept along, overwhelming everything that obstructed its progress. Logs of wood, trees torn up by the roots, and heaps of cane, swept by us with fear- ful rapidity, and the river whirled and foamed and eddied, as if it were lashing itself into a fury. There was no time to be lost if we would save our shingles, and so, building up a huge fire, we commenced carrying them 104 MOKE WATEE THAN PLEASUEE. higher up the bank. At least twenty feet above us was another platform, and all night we toiled, transporting there our shingles, our tools, and the component materials of our camp. In the morning the weather changed, and the sun came out to look upon the mischief that had been done in his absence. We prepared a hasty and candor compels me to add rather poor breakfast, and then looked around upon the scene of desolation. The river swept over our camp-ground, and was gradually creeping up the bank, but Joe said that our " possibles" were now beyond its reach. We must, however, search for another camp, and at it we went, not in the best humors in the world. Immediately above us was the outlet of a palmetto brake, which was sufficiently low to admit the now aspiring waters of the river, and therefore we must venture in the canoe if we would go up stream, or even if we would find the trail such as it was that led homeward. It looked rather squally, but could not be helped ; so embarking our provisions and tools in the canoe, we set forth upon a somewhat perilous voyage. Koeping close to the bank, and obtaining what advan- tage we could by catching hold of the branches on shore, and when it depended upon paddles alone, wielding them with all our might, we finally, and after an hour's hard labor, reached the spot which Joe had designated for our new home. I jumped on shore, tied up the boat, and then received our little freight from the hands of Joe, who stood up in the tottering craft, balancing himself and JOE OVERBOARD. 105 her with apparent unconcern, and no little pride at his skill. All was discharged save Joe and the pro- visions, and the former, catching up the bag which contained the latter, was just about stepping ashore, when the idea struck him that ' so great a feat as we had lately performed would be but imperfectly con- cluded unless duly celebrated by a right honest yell. So, turning round to stare the river right in the face, he commenced what was intended for the loudest shout on record, but alas ! was nipped in the very bud by the ope- rator, bag and all, tumbling overboard. Away swept the tide, away swept Joe, and away swept the bag. They had vanished from my sight for we had turned a short corner just before landing and in an instant after the catastrophe, nothing remained visible or audible except a sort of mixture of yell and water, that seemed to come from beneath the surface. I jumped into the canoe again and was carried down stream in a hurry, having the mor- tification to whirl right by Joe, who was very composedly hanging to an extending limb, not ten yards from the spot where he fell in, and inquired in a petulant manner what I " cut that dern fool caper for," and " where I expected to go to?" Luckily for me, I also caught a branch, and Joe, letting go all, except the provision bag, to which he clung with his teeth, was alongside immedi- ately. In a few minutes we were back in harbor again, and I gave Joe a piece of my mind about "hallooing before he was out of the woods," to which he retorted in the same strain and not intended as a complimentary one either some remarks touching my skill in canoe navigation. No harm had been done after all, except the wetting of 5* 106 MORE WATER THAN PLEASURE. our provisions, which, by the way, were very near a total loss. The meal was ruined, the salt dissolved, and flavor- ing the coffee, and nothing but a piece of junk beef remaining in anything of an eatable condition, so that, excepting the said beef, our dinner was a thing past pray ing for. Beef, Joe would have relinquished without a murmur ; the meal even, might have been ruined without exciting his ire ; but to do without coffee was monstrous, and not to be conceived of, and a return home for a new supply that very evening was proposed and carried nem. con, Selecting a partially formed cave near the top of the bank, we soon improvised a temporary residence, and then we found, in a brake a few rods behind us, some admirable cypress. To work we went, felled a tree, . cut it into proper lengths, and then, to try its adaptability for shingles, we must needs split up and shave a few. All of these occupations consumed so much time, that when we returned to our new home, the sun had abandoned our side of terra firma, and was upon a visit to foreign parts. I strenuously objected to returning by night, but Joe would have it that the moon must soon make her appear- ,ance, and that even without her light he could find his way, and so, as usual, I yielded. Disdaining all attempt at following the trail, which indeed would have been useless at night, Joe boldly struck what he called a bee-line for home, and in ten minutes we found ourselves knee-deep in water, floun- dering about in the abominable palmetto brake. Joe swore a little, and so completely worn out was I with the fatigue of the night and day, that laughing NAVIGATING A EHAKE. IV, 7 at him was entirely out of the question upon my part. There was now but one course to be pursued. If we endeavored to escape from the brake, we should cer- tainly and inevitably pass a night in the woods, and as we had very foolishly left behind us all means of making a fire, this would have been anything but plea- sant. "We could but follow out the brake to the prairie, or at least until such time as the moon rose, and trust to fortune for keeping us as straight as possible. Our plan was ingenious, but slow of execution. As often as once in four feet grew one of those high hum- mocks caused by the roots of the palmetto and of course on it the plant itself. Jumping from one to another of these hummocks was the only mode by which we could avoid wading, and to keep our course we hit upon the following expedient : Joe, having satisfied him- self by some mysterious kind of astronomy for trees were not in the way where we then were he turned his face in the right direction, and grasping a palmetto to retain his footing, remained firm and immovable until I had preceded him for some distance, hopping squirrel- like from bunch to bunch. "When I had made a proper offing, I shouted, and was then ordered to the right or the left, accordingly as I varied from the proper course. When I was rightly placed, then Joe went ahead, while I remained still, and so proceeding, we made sure but slow progress. In about an hour and a half the moon at last appeared, and we found ourselves very near the open pine woods, which we entered with joy, for our swamp journey had been none of the most delightful. To say nothing of the abominable " moccasins " that abounded there, there was 108 MOKE WATER THAN PLEASURE. no want of panthers or bear, in and around the swamp, and we stood a pretty good chance of stumbling upon some travelling alligator. We came off unscathed, to be sure, but that night I made a vow against any more voluntary swamp escapades, and determined that my first speculation in wood should be my last. The next day it recommenced raining, and kept it up for a week, and when at last we started upon our return, Joe, after walking a mile, complained of illness, and back we went again. It was fortunate that we did go, for the next day he was delirious from a violent fever. Everything in the shape of a man, excepting Sam Ming, Old Caesar, and ourselves, had left the settle- ment, and engaged in a general " cow-hunt." Sam and Old Africa had been left as a necessary guard, but the former had taken it into his head to indulge in a fit of shakes, and the latter was incapacitated for severe horseback exercise, and so perforce I must make a trip down the prairie for the nearest doctor, who enjoyed a convenient little circle of practice, of which the radii were something over thirty miles. We lived upon the very verge of the circle, and my ride through an open prairie, without path or trail, was not a joke for a neophyte like myself. I need not now tell how, after floundering on from one marais to another, jumping gullies when I could, and heading them when I could not, wading an extempore creek here, and swim- ming another there, I finally about sunset reached the doctor's settlement. This prairie travelling is very like the coasting service. You set off with some lone tree, miles off in the mid DRY LAND COASTING. prairie, for your guide, keeping a good offing from the timber, but steering in towards one point, and bearing away from another, for all the world as a pilot would take a vessel through Long Island Sound. CHAPTER XL NEW ACQUAINTANCES UNCLE BILLY AND HIS VERNACULAR. A LARGE frame house, with a number of small barns and outhouses, very rude, and entirely innocent of paint indeed, but yet of more pretension than Texan build- ings generally, loomed up quite largely on the prairie, and the doctor's settlement stood confessed before me. My wearied horse evidently knew it also, and without any hint from me, took the straightest possible course for the plantation. Riding up to the bars, I gave the usual " hallo," and out rushed the customary number of dogs to greet me, barking and yelping as if some wild animal had arrived. At last the doctor himself came out. He was a very large, and particularly good-humored looking man, over six feet in height, and dressed oddly enough in broad- cloth pantaloons, seated and "foxed" with buckskin, no vest, and a kind of pea jacket of white flannel. He wore a huge flap-eared Quaker hat, and, as I afterwards dis- covered, belonged to the persuasion of Friends. Rather a queer country for Quakers, it would appear, and rather a difficult one to retain the plain language and plain dress in ; indeed the hat was the only outward sign left, except- ing an occasional " thee " when the good lady of the house was addressed. " Come, sir, light and get out and be hanged to you OFF, IN THE FIKST BOAT. Ill (to the dogs) come in, the boys will see to your horse ; here, boys !" was the Doctor's salutation. Dismounting, I placed my horse in the hands of two stalwart lads, and as I walked towards the house, I deli- vered my message. " What ! Joe sick ? tough Joe ? who'd have thought it ?" said the Doctor. " Wants me to-night, eh ? Well, I don't know any one that I'd ride up the prairie for in such tra- velling as quick as I would for Joe ; and so. I'll be off ; but you must stay all night. I'd be glad of your com- pany, but you're not used to such night work, and there are two gentlemen in the house who are going up to-mor- row, and will ride with you. Come in." " Thank you," I replied ; " I must own to being pretty well tired, but still I fear I shall be needed at Joe's." " Oh, no," answered the Doctor, " I'll see to Joe until you return ; and besides these two gentlemen here want to have a talk with you." " With me ?" I demanded, in some astonishment. " Yes, sir, if you are Mr. P., as I suppose you are. They are going up country to-morrow, and intended stop- ping at the Houghs on purpose to see you. They are pretty largely mixed up in land speculation, and want assistance somebody that they can trust to examine titles, make out and copy papers, hunt up testimony, and I don't know what else. They'll pay well." " But, Doctor, what do they know about me, how did they hear of me, and who are they ?" " Oh, they heard of you from somebody at Houston, and as to who they are ; one of 'em's Col. Ting, a sharp go-a- head fellow, I tell you ; was in nearly every scrimmage in * '36,' an old soldier every inch of him ; and the other's 112 UNCLE BILLY AND HIS VERNACULAR. known all over Texas, and Alabama too, I believe, as Uncle Billy Roberts, a rich, jolly old planter, works a hundred negroes, is a partner of the Colonel's in some land operations, knows how to tell a funny story in the worst possible English in fact, he delights in outlandish expressions and is altogether one of the most kindly- hearted men I know of. But come, let's go into the house." The principal room was tenanted by the two gentlemen aforesaid the Colonel, a man over six feet in height, thin as a latch, dressed with some pretension, and looking as sharp and martinet-ish as possible ; Uncle Billy, quite as tall as the other, but large and jovial, looming up in a full suit of home-made jeans, of a reddish brown color and the Doctor's wife, and daughter. After an off-hand introduction, we sat down to supper ; and after supper, the Doctor took his departure, and the two strangers and I walked out in front -of the house, took seats upon the fence, and commenced negotiations. Dur- ing the whole conversation, the Colonel whittled away at a bit of stick in the most Yankeefied way possible, while Uncle Billy tugged away at his short-stemmed stone pipe. The agreement was soon made ; they wanted me, and I was anxious to see as much of the country as I could, and to engage in some employment more congenial to my feelings and habits than shingle-making. Seated at length around the huge fire-place, where a small fire had been kindled to banish the damps of even- ing, Uncle Billy remarked to me : " Well, stranger, seen rough times, I reckon ; allers the case with new comers ; never knew it fail. Thar's the Cun'nle, ask him ; ask old Doctor Wheaton, but you can't, HOW UNCLE BILLY CAME THERE. 113 seein' he's half way up the prairie by this time ; but thar's his old woman, she'll tell you." To this very general speech, Col. Ting assumed the duty of replying, and his reply was very Down-East indeed. " Pray, Uncle Billy," said he, " what first brought you to Texas?" " Me ! why the consarned ' fever an' ager ' did it. I shan't forget my first trip, ner what happened soon arter neither, I tell yow," replied Uncle Billy. " Why, Cun'nle, I sfaid with Old Charley Birkham. You knew him, I reckon?" " I have heard of him," replied Ting, " and if you know anything about his death and that lynching affair, I should like to hear it." " Well," said Uncle Billy, " I reckon I might as well tell the whole on 't ; so here goes " Before I give Uncle Billy's story, in its own unadul- terated native vernacular, a few remarks on the singular idioms of the South West will not be mal-apropos and as this is the age of plagiarism, I trust I shall commit no very heinous offence in stealing from myself the following extract from a somewhat lengthy paper on the subject, written some years since : The origin and perpetuity of many of our queer and out-of-the-way phrases, may be traced to the semi-annual meetings of gentlemen of the bar at the courts of our Southern and Western States. These gentlemen, living as they do in the thinly inha- bited portion of our land, and among a class of persons generally very far their inferiors in point of education, rarely enjoying anything that may deserve the name of 114 UNCLE BILLY AND HIS VERNACULAR. intellectual society, are too apt to seek for amusement in listening to the droll stories and odd things always to be heard at the country store or bar-room. Every new expression and queer tale is treasured up, and new ones manufactured against the happy time when they shall meet their brothers-in-law at the approaching term of the district court. If ever pure fun, broad humor, and " Laughter holding both his sides," reign supreme, it is during the evening of these sessions. Each one empties and distributes -his well filled budget of wit and oddities, receiving ample payment in like coin, which he pouches, to again dissemi- nate at his earliest opportunity. Although I may lay down, as a general rule, that the same words and phrases prevail throughout the South and West, yet almost every State has its local peculiarities ; Texas, for instance, the large admixture of Spanish words ; Louisiana, of French ; Georgia and Alabama borrow many from the Indians. North Carolina is notorious for a peculiar flatness of pronunciation in such words as crap for " crop," earn for " corn," peert for " pert," " You will be perfectly safe, Sheriff," added the District Attorney, " in opening your budget. And I join with niy friend and superior, the Judge, in demanding, or request- ing to know all that you can tell us of this matter, of Henkins against Ting and others. I wish to know par- ticularly if, among the witnesses, there be not some against whom I have indictments. So please make a clean breast of it at once." , " Well, gentlemen," returned the Sheriff, " if you put it upon that score I must comply, although perhaps I had better keep some of my information for the Grand Jury." " No, sir, you don't," answered Ormsby. " Time enough for the Grand Jury yet ; we must deliberate and act with extreme caution in this matter. Now cut this matter as short as may be, for time is money, and a heap of it too, with us this night." " Well, Mr. Judge, or, perhaps I had better say Mr. Attorney General for I prefer just now to consider you A VERY NICE CASE. 215 in that light I do believe, upon my word, that this case of Henkins is one mass of rascality from beginning to the end ; and if it were not so, the colonel's chance would not be worth the price of a summons. They have a clear title, approved by the board, while the colonel only claims to have made the original survey, and deposited the proper documents in the surveyor's office with a deputy who died, disappeared, or took himself off the last is the most likely immediately after ; and to have -occupied and improved the land, but only when all question had appa- rently been settled by the commissioners. Now, as I said, he only claims these grounds for a title ; he can't prove them ; he has not as yet been able to bring in a single witness to establish the survey, or the fact of depositing his papers in the office ; his papers, even if not destroyed, are in the hands of his enemies, and some of them, at least, made over to that scamp Horseley. What then is the reason that Henkins' lawyers don't force the case on, and get a decision ? Because they know the rottenness of their foundation, and the bad metal of the tools with which they work. They can't get Horseley to come up to the rack ; he has a wholesome fear of the colonel's drawing a bead upon him ; and then your people have been rummaging, and poking, and working in the dark so much, that they fear, when they get their witnesses on the stand, you will trip up their heels somehow, and get a hold upon the jury, who we all know, in such cases, care little for points of law or a judge's charge. " I have just received information of an accident that helps your case mightily. Mr. P., your counsel, that was to have arranged and managed this case, was riding in a gig with Muggridge Henkins' great gun in Galveston, 216 DIAMOND CUT DIAMOND. the other day, when their heads being too light or bodies too heavy, the horse starts, mashes up, upsets, or breaks down the gig, and nearly breaks up the gentlemen at the same time. They are certainly fixed for slow travelling for a month to come. Muggridge's partner, Small, is a capital lawyer, but wants nerve, and is never to be trusted alone. With his senior at his elbow he can get along swimmingly ; but let him be left alone, and have anything unexpected turn up, and he lets go all and breaks right down ; so you see by the upset, they have lost their best man, and you have gained our friend, the Judge, who, in this case, is worth a heap of such very learned lawyers as your man is. Small don't know a word about his partner's fix, and he shan't, till to-morrow ; and you must take advantage of the flurry he will be in when he finds the case will come on, and his general wont. They have got record testimony enough, in all conscience, and a set of scamps for witnesses ; but they rely principally upon a no-account whelp who, it seems, was, one of the colonel's surveying party, and I imagine, has been bribed and trained to swear just what they want. His name is Whitely, and he is a kind of hanger on of the judge's old friend. Sol Wilgus. If they can keep him sober, they can do anything they please with him, but if he gets a little over the bay, the d 1 himself couldn't handle him. Sol has him in charge, and is to keep him straight ; but Sol can't keep away from " the tiger" (the game of Faro), that is spread- ing out his claws at Budd's grocery, in the back room, and Whitely is staked out at old man Jepp's, out here a couple of miles. If any one can manage Sol, the judge can. There, you have all the items I can give you, and you must make the most of it. Good night, and keep dark." SOL WILGtJS. 217 " A pretty good hand," said the judge, as the door closes behind our two friends ; " a pretty good hand if well played. P , lend me all the money you have ; my purse is better lined than usual, but I may want more. You must stay here ; get things fixed up snug a deck of cards and a bottle of brandy and I will be back with Sol Wilgus before long. Keep cool and don't get nervous." And off he went. This Wilgus, upon whom the judge depended so much, was, as my quizzical friend termed him, one of the " d 1's unaccountables." Too lazy to work, too fond of petty jockeying to be honest, full of rude wit and practical jokes, too powerful and courageous a man to be quarrelled with, and too good-humored to quarrel, never committing any act of violence or descending to theft ; but, as he said, "just getting an easy living- as he went along ;" he was looked upon as a necessary evil, and a very amusing one at that. "Whenever he honored the town with his pre- sence, and located himself, pro tern., in an easy attitude upon the piazza of one of the groceries, cracking his jokes and telling his stories, a crowd would always gather around him ; and among them were many who had better have been better employed. In about an hour Ormsby arrived with Sol in tow, both in great good humor and as merry as could be. " Three cheers for my system of practice," said the judge, as he entered. " I can beat my sub all to sticks at breaking up faro-banks. I've broke Budd's, and shut up his ' tiger' for this night at least." " Might' apt," chimed in Sol. " The Judge r s some, I tell ye, and this child was a commin' it, too, right on his trail, ondly I couldn't bark quite so peart. Dog-on- 10 218 DIAMOND CUT DIAMOND. my cat ef we wern't ater that tiger with a sharp stick, Mr. P." " Glad to hear it, Sol," said I, " but you must need wet- ting down after such warm work ; there's some brandy and water on the table." " I'm thar," replied Sol, " but don't mind the water. I'm powerful fond on't, but likes it best outside. Come, Judge, here's to them paws with the claws drawed out." " I think you must hare a big enough pile to start a menagerie on your own account," replied the Judge. " A young one, prehaps, Judge ; some one must do it, that's shua," said Sol ; " ef they don't, what '11 the grand jury, and your leftenant, the persecutin atterney, do for gamblin' cases ? But ef I'm to open a game, I recken I'd best not take that small hand of poker with you. Thar's Mr. P , now, I could take out his eye-teeth and he wouldn't know it ; but, dern my skin, ef fancy playin's any whar longside of you." " Well, well, Sol, don't be alarmed. No need of a game. Sit down and let's have a chat upon matters and things," answered Ormsby. " How is your friend that you have staked out for the night at old Jepp's?" " Thar. I'd a sworn it ; you didn't give me an invite up here to take a horn for nothin. You're one of em. I allers said it, and I'll stick to it. Come, open pan and out with it ; ef I kin do anythin, say it, and Sol's the child for the game. Many's the foul snap you've see me clar of, and many's the time you've let me up when them all-fired grand jury doins got me down, and Sol don't forget. Spit it out, and ef it's anything but work, jest say, it's done," was Sol's reply. " How much does Small pay you for mounting guard DEFINING OUR POSITION. 219 over Wilgus, and leaving him out on the prairie while you are playing with the tiger ?" inquired Ormsby. "Dern his skin, the no 'count ornary pup," replied Sol. " I got broke, and hunted him up to get an X, and don't you think, the jo-fired mean whelp wouldn't stake me, but read me a lecter about the keerds, and tho' I teld him I'd got Wilgus comfetable tight and safe in bed, and wer gwine to fotch him up to the stand in the mornin', bright as one of them half dollars they say old Henkins makes down to Dickinson's Bayou, he ripped and tore so, that I had to make out I were a startin' fer Jepp's. He made his threats too, and ef I don't come our even with him afore it's done, jest say Sol Wilgus is gone under." " Sol," said Ormsby, in a quiet and impressive manner, "just cool off and listen. I want to tell you a story. Some time ago no matter when but before poor Jack was appointed Judge, he had a very tough case to man- age. His client was a straightforward, honest man, just like Colonel Ting ; and the other side was nothing but rascality, but Rascality had plenty of witnesses, cocked and primed, to swear to anything, and what was worse, Rascality had stolen all of Honesty's testimony record and parole hid his papers, and drove off his men. " Jack wanted to get the case put over, but was afraid that he could not, and so he set his wits to work, to tip over his neighbor's crib, as he couldn't get any corn into his own. Mr. Rascality's main witness was a fellow that could not be trusted except when he was sober, and so he was put under the charge of a very worthy and honest scamp, that got his living by playing faro, and poker, jockeying horses, and betting on quarter races, and mak- ing very respectable men laugh at his queer capers, and 220 DIAMOND CUT DIAMOND. help him out of scrapes when they should have helped him into the county jail if there had only been one." Here the Judge looked very knowingly at Sol, who hit me a sly poke in the side, acknowledged the Judge's glance with an expressive wink, helped himself liberally to the contents of the bottle, offered it to the narrator, was not refused, and then settled himself down gravely to hear and comprehend the rest of the tale. " Mr. Rascality's lawyers did not know that Jack was engaged on the other side, or they would not have chosen the chap they did. Jack knew that his man could not stay on duty as long as there was a faro bank agoing in the town, and so he went to the grocery where the game was on foot to find him, and then sat down and broke the bank, so as to get him away ; took him home, told him a story that any fool could understand it won't do to speak too plain in these matters played a game of poker, and lost twenty dollars very foolishly " " And the witness didn't make a show next mornin', I reckon," interrupted Sol. " Yes, but he did though," resumed the Judge, " and a very pretty show too ; somehow his brain had got a twist, and his tongue also. He had forgotten which side he was on, and Mr. Rascality's lawyer had to withdraw his case in a hurry." " I don't believe a word about that's happenin'," said Sol, " yet it mought, tho', and mighty apt too. Jack was smart, but it warn't him." " Never mind who it was," answered Ormsby, " it did happen, and may happen again, for all I know. Come, Sol, that game of poker." " Oh, let the poker slide, Judge," replied Sol ; " some SOL TAKES THE HINT. 221 other time, when I want a stake, or get into a scrape, I'll make a call. I must go and look after my man. Good night, gentlemen. Forgot which side he was on, eh? Well, that's some." " Mr. Ormsby," I inquired, when Sol had retreated out of ear-shot, " can we trust him ?" " Trust him ! yes. Little he cares for Ting or Henkins, but he identifies me with the case, and would as soon join the Mexicans as betray us," said the Judge. " Come, to bed, we shall have to stir betimes in the morning." CHAPTER XXII. A GAME OP BRAG UNCLE BILLY ? S OPINION ABOUT " GOING OFF HALF COCKED." THE day, big with the fate of Roberts and of Ting, dawned at last. My breakfast was a slight one, but Ormsby did not allow the critical position of his client's case to interfere with the filling of his own. He seemed, in fact, in as great a glee as a schoolboy while witnessing the successful prosecution of some piece of cunning mis- chief that he had devised. Ten o'clock arrived ; the sheriif had bawled out the necessary " Yes" three times, and the court was opened. The Judge was seated in his throne of state an old kitchen chair, bottomed with oak splints upon a rude kind of dais at the further end of the room, and behind a rickety desk that might once have graced a district school. Beneath the dignitary, in a similar chair and before a small pine table, sat the clerk ; and ranged around the room, or placed across it, were sundry benches, all filled with spectators, clients, witnesses, and lawyers. For the latter's especial benefit, two strips of unplaned boards, supported upon saw-horses, had been improvised. Ormsby gave me an elbow hint to look at Small, who was evidently in a fidget, and just as my glance fell upon him, he was opening a letter that had been presented by the sheriff. He frowned, muttered- something, and crum- pling up the paper, thrust it in his pocket. THE GAME OPENED. 223 At this moment the case was called up. " Who appears for the plaintiff in this ejectment suit ?" inquired the Judge. " I do, your honor," replied Small ; " but I am sorry to say that Mr. Muggridge, who is with me in it, has been seriously injured as I have just learned and cannot attend." " May't please your honor," interrupted Ormsby, " I appear upon the defence, and have had but twenty-four hours to examine the case, which my learned friend has been studying for the last three years. The eminent coun- sellor who was to have led upon our side was unfortu- nately with Mr. Muggridge when the accident occurred, and is also incapacitated from attending." " Good heavens !" cried the Judge, " do you mean to say, gentlemen, that you wish to have this interminable case adjourned again ; if you do, I assure you the request must come from both sides, and coupled with weighty and valid reasons too." " I assure your honor that you will find no impediment upon our part," replied Ormsby. " We are probably much better prepared than the adverse party have any idea of." ' ; Why, Ormsby," whispered I to him, as he took his seat again, " what do you mean by throwing away this chance of obtaining all that we can ask for ?" " Hush !" said he. " We shall get it adjourned, and be paid for it too. Look at Small ; he had the entire getting up of the prosecution, and yet is frightened to death. I've fixed his flint ; and he looks as if he expected a mine to explode beneath his feet ; he is sure we have laid a trap, and when he gets nervous in this way, is as helpless as an infant, without he has Muggridge to lean upon." 224 A GAME OF BEAG. " Mr. Small," impatiently exclaimed the Judge, " I am waiting to hear from you." " I will go on, your honor," answered Small, in a timid, hesitating manner, " although I think, under the circum- stances, that " Here a succession of " whoops," that proceeded from some one under the window, and a loud cheer from a crowd, who had evidently assembled outside the building, cut the attorney's speech short, and he turned pale as death when the same voice that owned the " whoops," yelled out in tones that might have been heard a mile " Hoopee, boys ! who's afeard ? Hurray for . D n old Henkins, and hurray for Cunnle Ting. Whar's the Judge, and whar's the jury ? Fotch 'em up, and I'll lay down the lor fer 'em. Hurray fer Ormsby, and dern old Small. Who's a gwine to swar to a lie fer an X and no whiskey ? 'Tain't this child." " See to that disturbance immediately, Mr. Sheriff," said the Judge, in a rage. Out went the sheriff, and the Judge continued : " Proceed, Mr. Small ; Mr. Small. Where is Mr. Small?" " Gone out to regulate a refractory witness, I should think, your honor," replied Ormsby. " Yery extraordinary affair," said the Judge ; " and I must say Mr. Small's conduct appears to be greatly want- ing of respect towards the Court. I don't understand it." Small, at this moment returned, and before the Judge could commence the intended rebuke, addressed him hur- riedly with " Please your honor, it is a matter of imperative neces- "BLUFFED OFF." 225 sity that this case be adjourned until the next term of Court." " And why, sir ?" asked the Court, very sharply. " An all-important witness, " commenced Small. " Do you mean the drunken fellow, who has just created that disturbance ?" interrupted the Judge. " Who is he?" " His name is," hesitated Small, pretending to examine some papers " his name is Williams, I think, or Willis, or really this disturbance has annoyed me so that I have forgotten it for the moment." " Help him, Mr. Sheriff," said the Judge. " It's that Whitly, who was tried for cow-stealing at the last fall term of the court," replied the sheriff. " And do you ask to adjourn this case on his account, sir ?" demanded the Judge. " If we wait for him to be sober, we shall have to wait some time for testimony not worth a straw. What says the counsel for the defence ?" " That he will not consent," answered Ormsby. " Then," said the Judge, " the Court will only adjourn this case upon the prosecution's paying up all the costs that have already accrued, and that, too, without any future claim upon the defence, however this case may termi- nate." " Why, your honor," exclaimed Small, " the costs amount to over five hundred dollars." " If they have mounted up as high as that, so much the greater reason why it should be argued now," replied the Judge. " Will you proceed, or pay the costs ?" " I suppose we must submit, your honor, but" com- menced Small. 226 A GAME OF BRAG. " Then enter up the rule, Mr. Clerk," said the Judge, " and call on the next case ; too much time has been wasted in this matter." As we left the court-house, Ormsby turned to me and remarked : " A pretty well played hand of brag, I call it." In the course of the day Mr. Roberts arrived. He had made his escape from the Doctor's hands, and having heard of the accident that had befallen his counsel, feared that all was up with his cause ; but when told of Orrnsby's check-mate, was so delighted that he nearly shook our hands off. Seated that night in my room, Ormsby, who delighted in drawing the old man out, and betraying him into one of his queer yarns, started him off by remarking, that Small was a capital hand to get up a case, but should never be trusted to manage one alone ; for, said he, " when he gets his charge well down and all ready, he is sure to let his gun go off half-cocked." " It is a mighty bad failen in a gun to go off half-cocked," commenced ' Uncle Billy,' " and the chap that uses one of that sort is certain to shoot suthin' bigger ner a gobbler in the long run ; but the man that goes off half-cocked is as shure as fallin' off a log to shoot himself, and more ner onst, too. It's allers best, I reckon, to look at a thing all over twiste afore you meddle with it. I knowed an old doctor onst, as clever a soul as ever trotted pottecary stuff through a sick man, but his har-trigger war sot too fine, and though it war amost the ondly failin' he had, it war enuff to keep him in hot water all the time. He war pow- erful fond of his farm and garden, but, somehow, nothin' went well thar, he wer allers a gettin' some new kink in A GREAT SHOT. 227 his head, and afore he got half through one speriment he'd be a barkin' loud on some other trail. T Varnt at all sur- prisin' that when he had so many things goin' on in his field he hadn't any time to see to the fences around it. The cattle tormented him powerfully ; they got used to comin in, and come they would. "One of his naybors had a par of beeves that war mighty onruly to be shua, and he consaited they war allers the ring-leaders in brcakin' in. Arly one mornin' he got up and went out of his cabin, and putty soon heard the corn stalks a crackin' ; but there were a heavy fog on, and he couldn't see ten foot ahead, so he started off full split for the noise, and afore long sot eyes on suthin' that looked white among the corn. " ' By Ned/ says he, ' if it aint that owdacious critter of Miss Mash's, a helpin' hisself in broad daylight, septin' the fog ; that's putty chunked ; coming it rather too strong, I reckon. I said I'd pepper him the first time I treed him in my field, and, by thunder, I'll do it.' Back he went to the house and took down one of the boys' guns ; it war the old man's first experience in firm' one, and if you could have seen him put in a handful of powder and shot, all mixed up, you'd have allowed it war a dose of calomel and epekak he war a mixin for some misfortunit critter. Arter he rammed it all down, and put in nigh to half a pound o' cotton to keep all quiet, out he put, crawled up clus to whar the beef war a makin' his breakfast, and let fly, che- bang. For the fust fire it war a mighty good one, and fetched three things to onst the gun bust, the old man drapped like he'd been shot hisself, and the biggest part of him made a hole in the ground that they had to fill up arterwards like an old well, for he weighed! clean above 228 A GAME OF BEAG. two hundred ; and naybors that lived too far off to hear the gun, felt the shock and took it for a juvenile arthquake on a mineatewr plan. The beef swung backards and for- ards a second er two, just as if he war putty well corned, and he war too ; then down he drapped, gin a beller, and keeled up. In a minit here come the boys from the house a humpin' it and a hoopin'. " ' By thunder,' says one on 'ein, ' ef dad hasn't gone and done it now I'll be derned. I reckon Miss Mash's beef has got as much of a grist to grind as he'll want for some time. Hollo, father, are you tired, er what are ye squattin' down that way fer ?' " The old man sot still, didn't say a word, ner try to get up, and ef he had t'would have been of no sorter use. "Well, thar he sot for ten minits, and all the boys could do they couldn't git a word out ov him ; till at last, by prizin' and liftin' they got him on his legs agin, and then, arter scratchin' his head awhile, says he " ' John, which eend ov a gun do you mostways use to pint at anythin' when you want to knock it over ?' " ' Why,' says John, ' the leetle one in course.' " ' And do you generally put in the powder afore the lead or arter it ?' " ' Why afore it, to be sure.'- " ' Well,' says the old man, ' then I'm satisfied, for I put both together, and that accounts for both eends goin' off to onst ; but I allow Miss Mash's beef has got the tother half, and you'd best go see.' "All hands started off for the beef, and thar he war sure enough, made meat on, ondly twarnt Miss Mash's beef arter all, but the old doctor's white-faced steer. " There warn't much said about the way he died, least- A LITTLE TOO SMART. 229 ways not amongst the doctor's people ; but as he hadn't turned a furrer for their late crop, and beeves that war broke to the plough war very scus, and corn mighty high that year, thar war a heap of weevils in the old man's crib that either starved or changed their location. " It larnt him suthin' arter all, for whenever he'd bust up and fly all to pieces about nothin' at all, the old woman would say, 'that's right, father, don't you be imposed on, just serve 'em out like you did Miss Mash's beef ;' and the old man would cool down, and his tail drap directly. " Some folks hev got their trigger sot too fine on one thing and some on another, some goes off right ahead, and some are on the back ackshun principle, some is skert to death about nothin at all. and some gits as riley as thun- der and raises thar tails directly when nobody didn't mean to insult em ; and then agin thar's some goes a rarin' and tarin' arter all the mad wild-cat speckillations they can git item of, and generally comes out as the man did who diskivered the soap mine. " Any body that's lived on Galveston Bay could tell you who Dave Harris war. I reckon he wont disremember his first surveyin expedishun in a hurry. He war as green a man as ever you see catched, but he allowed he wor all- fired knowin one of them ' too smart' ones that's too knowin to go alone. Dave wor a little thirsty Yankee, that looked jist 'sif he'd been fetched up on codfish tails, he wor so thin and dry. You'd hev larfed ef you could hev seen his rig fer his fust expedishun ; he had more blankets and riggin than would hev sarved out a dozen ; and his saddle war hung around with coffee-pots and tin cups, till it looked jist like a tin peddler's waggin a horseback ; and 230 A GAME OF BRAG. as fer spurs, he'd mounted the biggest par I ever see, good six inches across the rowell. " The first night we camped out war on Clar Creek, whar he'd made his location. Our horses war staked out, and we war a settin round the fire, on the ground, a tellen big snake stories for Dave's edification ; when all ov a sudden, up he jumpt, gin a most onarthly yell, and then keeled up. " ' Oh, Lord !' says he. ' Oh, Lord ! ! Oh, Lord ! ! !' " ' Why, what's the matter, Dave ?' says I. " ' Oh, Lord ! I'm a dead man ; tear out my hat linin and give me a chunk of coal, I want to make my will directly. Oh, Lord ! oh, Lord ! that I should hev quit the place whar I lived to hum down East to come here and be killed by a rattlesnake /' " ' A rattlesnake,' ses I. ' Hurra, boys ! hunt him up, arter him, er else some ov the rest on us '1 catch it.' " Well, we stirred up the fire till it gin a powerfull bright light, and hunted all around, but couldn't see no sign ov anything like a snake ; so we gin up, and all hands went to see what we could do for Dave. "He said he was bit whar he set down on, and we inspected putty close, but couldn't find nothin serus, thar wasn't any swellin nor nothin ov that sort to speak on ; and finally he got more docious, and gin in that he war'nt a goin to make a die ov it that time, but he swar it war a snake bit him, only he reckoned he'd jumpt up so mighty spry that the varmint hadn't time to get the poison in. " He came up to the fire agin, and dropped on his knees (which wer the way he'd been a settin afore), then he sunk down till the biggest part ov him lit on his heels, and the minit it did, up he jumped agin and yelled out A DANGEROUS PAIR OF SPURS. 231 "'Snake! snake!! snake!!!' " ' Shut up,' says I, ' you dog-on, no-account critter, ef you can't tell a durn fool par ov spurs, from a rattlesnake, ye'd best stayed to hum and sent your old woman a land- huntinV "* On the next day Mr. Roberts and I left Maiden for Houston, and thence he proceeded to his plantation upon the Brazos, and I across the prairie to Galveston, meeting on my journey with nothing of sufficient interest to record. Galveston and the Bay County possess, however, so much of historical interest, that although it is not my intention to enter upon a topographical description of Texas, a few pages may be very properly devoted to them. *The author is aware, that many of his readers have met with this last story, of " Uncle Billy" before ; but it has been re-printed and re-written, and twisted and turned, and made over, until he can scarcely recognise his own offspring ; and has introduced it here for the purpose of reclaiming it to its home, anc 1 >f showing where that home is. CHAPTER XXIII. GALVESTON. THIS city as every one knows, or should know is built upon that narrow strip of sand which separates Galveston Bay from the Gulf of Mexico. You will neither perceive island nor city until you are close upon them. The shore, low and destitute of any- thing that may deserve the name of a tree, presents no prominent landmarks to the mariner ; and many a vessel, before the city was built, has sought in vain the inlet to the Bay. I have always considered Galveston as one of the most charming places in appearance that I have ever seen. The regular streets are of dazzling and solid white sand the houses new and nearly all painted white the dwellings built in that easy, sans-souci style peculiar to the French and Spanish cottage ; and all of them surrounded and embowered with the shrubbery of the tropics the several varieties of the fig, the orange, the lemon, the pomegra- nate, and great numbers of flowering plants, that with us require the greatest care and attention, but there grow to a large size, almost unattended and uncared for such as the various kinds of jessamine, the tube rose, the oleander,