. OF CALIF. LIBRARY, LOS AHGILBS The WINNING FIGHT By HERBERT KAUFMAN OWEN W. BREWER Chicago Jttnr. OP CALIF. LIBBJOT, IDS HKHBTM Copyright, 1910 by Herbert Kaufman When you stop to think of what you ve done, And you count your struggles, one by one, The times when you stood, tho ' you wished to run When it cost a mighty lot to stick And play the game without a tricky Tho' all the while (if you'd been slick) You might have saved both time and cash, But you chose instead to go to crash Rather than let your honor smash When you measure yourself against the rest And find that you stood the hardest test And, because of your code, came out the best // you've always k Q pt n the clean, straight side, A nd there isn 't a thing that you wish to hide, You're well entitled to glow with pride // your ways and your days have all been right, And you're not afraid of the strongest light, You\e fought the only Winning Fight. 7 21 The twentieth century was born without a memory it's so busy with today's achieve- ments and tomorrow's projects that no one has time to remember yesterday's exploits. THE MODERN PACE Opportunity changes her pass-word every day the world is spinning four times as fast as it used to, A few misguided astron- omers may try to dispute the fact but they're living 4 'among the stars/' The man who hasn't progressed is like the house- holder who expects the key of his old flat to fit his new home "he can't get in*" Information soon becomes obsolete in an age where improvement dismantles more machinery than wear and tear which in- cubates sky-scrapers over-month which sets up a creed one week and upsets it the next which creates a hero yesterday and changes his laurel wreath to a fool's cap to-morrow* No man is secure who feels a sense of security. Self-complacency is a frost it kills growth. Self-satisfaction is a rust it Herbert Kaufman _,, dolls brilliance* The universe wants new Modern wa ^ s ^ doing old things and the new ways Pace become old over-night* The twentieth century was born without a memory it's so busy with today's achieve- ments and tomorrow's projects that no one has time to remember yesterday's exploits. The new era has cancelled the lie of vested right. Position and assured status can no longer be inherited* The millions have at last overtaken the thousands* The sons of service are standing shoulder to shoulder with the sons of privilege. The barriers are down this is the day of equal chance- when any man may have what he wills if he possess the strength to reach it* Those whose fathers had but the right to use their hands may now employ their brains* New view-points bred of centuries of peasant's dreams and forbidden ambi- tions are dominant* An eager Americanism is measuring off centuries in ten-year lengths crowding days of energy into hour spaces. The older mankind grows the younger its masters \2 The Modern Pace become. The modern pace is wearing upon < humans as wheels are worn when they race Pace at reckless speed. The narrow man can't survive. Broader chests and broader foreheads are ready to replace him. The yotmg man is challenging his ability. Unless he constantly renews his vitality and reviews his knowledge unless he keeps posted and keeps pacing unless he adds to his mental kit the newer tools of thought and trade the newer systems and the newer economics he can- not hope to compete in the after-building. Just as the power-riveter replaces a score of hammers just so the new type of man the virile, full-nerved, terrific, high-ten- sion worker is pounding down the unfit. There is no mercy for the weakling the battle-field of Caesar's day was not more brutal Human nature has not changed only the weapons. The Roman fought with steel for gold we are fighting with gold for steel. The moment you become a foolish miser, gloating over your yesterdays, you are lost* 13 Herbert Kaufman The You mtist keep absorbing new ideas as well Modern as new a j r . You must build your walls Pace higher and thicker and constantly. New men with new strength and new weapons of competition are "marching onward in the dawn" to give you contest they ask no quarter they grant none. J4 Walls crumble and em- pires fall. The tidal wave sweeps from the sea and tears a fortress from its rocks. The rot- ting nations drop from off Time's bough, and only things the dream- ers make live on. 15 THE DREAMERS They are the architects of greatness. Their vision lies within their souls. They never see the mirages of Fact, but peer beyond the veils and mists of doubt and pierce the walls of unborn Time. The World has accoladed them with jeer and sneer and jibe t for worlds are made of little men who take but never give who share but never spare who cheer a grudge and grudge a cheer. Wherefore, the paths of progress have been sobs of blood dropped from their broken hearts* Makers of empire, they have fought for bigger things than crowns and higher seats than thrones. Fanfare and pageant and the right to rule or will to love are not the fires which wrought their resolution into \1 Herbert Kaufman The steel. Grief only streaks their hairs with Dreamers silver, but has never greyed their hopes. They are the Argonauts, the seekers of the priceless fleece the Truth. Through all the ages they have heard the voice of Destiny call to them from the un- known vasts. They dare uncharted seas, for they are makers of the charts. With only cloth of courage at their masts and with no compass save their dreams, they sail away undaunted for the far, blind shores. Their brains have wrought all human miracles. In lace of stone their spires stab the Old World's skies and with their golden crosses kiss the sun. The belted wheel, the trail of steel, the churning screw, are shuttles in the loom on which they weave their magic tapestries. A flash out in the night leaps leagues of snarling seas and cries to shore for help, which, but for one man's dream, would never come. Their tunnels plow the river bed and chain the islands to the Motherland. Their wings of canvas beat the air and 18 The Dreamers add the highways of the eagle to the human The paths* Dreamers A God-hewn voice swells from a disc of glue and wells otrt through a throat of brass, caught sweet and whole, to last beyond the maker of the song, because a dreamer dreamt* What would you have of fancy or of fact if hands were all with which men had to build? Your homes are set upon the land a dreamer found* The pictures on its walls are visions from a dreamer's soul* A dreamer's pain wails from your violin. They are the chosen few the Blazers of the Way who never wear Doubt's bandage on their eyes who starve and chill and hurt, but hold to courage and to hope, because they know that there is always proof of truth for them who try that only cowardice and lack of faith can keep the seeker from his chosen goal, but if his heart be strong and if he dream enough and dream it hard enough, he can attain, no matter where men failed before* 19 Herbert Kaufman Walls crumble and empires fall. The tidal wave sweeps from the sea and tears a fortress from its rocks. The rotting nations drop from off Time's bough, and only things the dreamers make live on. They are the Eternal Conquerors their vassals are the years. 20 He seeks his model in a mirror measures him- self by his own image and never falls short of his ideal. He is intol- erable of the rest of the world and to it. 21 THE MAN WHO KNOWS IT ALL His conceit is his defeat his constancy to himself is a model of devotion for all lovers* He neither wishes nor misses the regard of others he's a combination Darby and Joan* He seeks his model in a mirror measures himself by his own image and never falls short of his ideal. He is intolerable of the rest of the world and to it. He heeds what pleases him most and not what helps him he makes no friends because he destroys the basis of friendship that frankness which warns a man of his errors before they have time to grow into habits. He is insulted at the truth he has not learned and will not be taught that sincerity is seldom flattering and that flat- tery is never sincere. His universe is a swelled head with 23 Herbert Kaufman The the pronotm "I" for an axis* His brain Man Who is stunted because he will not let it Knows It expand he denies it nutrition he is no longer in an absorptive mood he considers himself beyond the point of learning and is therefore unfit to teach. His ability lessens as his complacency grows his sense of humor soon deserts him or he would realize that he is long-eared instead of long-headed* He is a boor and a bore t constantly inflicting his lopsided theories and advice upon his listeners* Those who voluntarily remain within his circle are objective they have either found a use for him or hope that he will find a use for them. He builds life badly because he builds alone in his hour of opportunity he neglects to earn well-wishers and in his hour of distress his smirking, fawning intimates (upon whom he has burdened his offensive mannerisms) are first to add their kicks to that of misfortune* He carries his egotism into his business* If in earlier years he created a success, he 24 The Man Who Knows It All insists that all who follow after him must The of necessity either be followers or be fools* Man Who He does not know that he is wrong until he Knows It is wrecked his conceit makes him color- blind to all signals of danger. He sniffs at his competitors and permits them to expand without opposition until they can sniff at him. He must fail because he does not keep his mental mechanism up-to-date he must fail as inevitably as a hatter who persists in creating styles which please himself* without regard to the wishes of his cus- tomers. He is like the recruit who declared himself the only man in the entire regiment keeping proper step. You can't help him, because he can't hear you there is no deafness so complete as that of egotism no blindness so absolute as that of those who will not open their eyes. He is a danger and a menace to any enterprise a stubborn mule hitched with his head toward the dashboard. One wagon wheel turning in reverse 25 Herbert Kaufman The action forces the other three to strain Man Who doubly hard one such man in a business Knows It can uselessly double the work of all his associates. He is always sure that he is in the right t but he never takes into account how much his rights have a right to weigh for the "right of way/' The sooner he is eliminated the better for all concerned he is a solitaire player and doesn't belong in a game with partners. He is neither curable nor endurable* He's a cheap riddance at any price even at his own idea of his value. 26 Those who yearn to wear the laurel wreath must learn to bear the fool's cap. The dif- ference between a jack- ass and genius isn't so much a matter of ears as of years. 27 THAT FOOL If you hope to improve the world, first look to be reproved. Man is suspicious of his benefactors* Jenner was fought and cursed for fighting the small-pox curse* The universe does not drop its beliefs they must be knocked down by proof. The mere possession of knowledge is nothing it is totally useless until it is used. You can't plant a new crop in an old field until you clear away the. stubble. The birth of an idea usually means the death of an ideal. Columbus was sure that the world was a giant apple and not a geological pan-cake t but he had to produce a western hemisphere before the fifteenth century believed in an eastern one. Your father had the chance to buy a share of the original telephone stock, but because he was an average man and there- 29 Herbert Kaufman That Fool fore narrow and suspicious of all that he did not understand, he congratulated him- self upon his common sense and invested the money in cigars* Your ancestors broiled a few thousand gentlemen for insulting their vanity for the terrible crime of thinking differently* Those who yearn to wear the laurel wreath must learn to bear the fool's cap. The difference between a jack-ass and genius isn't so much a matter of ears as of years. Great ambitions must be backed by great control, great denial and great de- termination. They who understand most are sometimes least understood. Just one man in a hundred can see beyond his nose the short-sighted people are in the majority and the majority rules. Only imagination can visualize what is to be most people have no imagination, therefore they doubt and ridicule what they do not comprehend. To them the oak is never apparent in the acorn* 30 That Fool "That fool" rang in the cars of every That Fool crusader of progress. Most illustrious men divide their careers into three chapters: Chapter One The time when they jeered me* Chapter Two The time when they cheered me. Chapter Three The time when they feared me. Fortune disdains mere ability brain is nothing without bravery* The man who can be thrashed by a sneer has retreated before he is defeated* Half the new town-halls are gifts from "blamed fools" who left home because they couldn't get a sixty-horse-power opportunity in a one- horse village* Marshall Field was dismissed for incompetency by a brilliant cross-roads merchant prince. Success is only for those who are willing to stand by their standards who are ready 31 Herbert Kaufman That Fool to endure the siege of mis judgment who are prepared to face the fire of criticism and to accept defeat until they become vac- cinated against it* Most men who gave up would have arrived if they had kept up* Nothing can be accomplished by a coward everything is possible to the courageous* The realm of "You Can't" is dwindling every year its coast-line is being eaten away by each successive surge of advance- ment. The greatest works of humanity are still incubating in the womb of time. They will be achieved by the "fools" who won't lie down until they've downed some lie. 32 Fate is old and wise and cunning and cruel. Every time she thinks of him she Every time she looks at him she winks. She has made him 33 THE FAILURE When the bookkeeper reaches the office he finds him puzzling through the mail and scheming out his coming nine hours of routine* He hasn't had a month's vacation since he slipped in harness. He takes a scant half hour for luncheon even at fifty years of age he hasn't earned the right to a leisurely midday cigar. His daily path runs in a straight line from his desk to his bed. He's a slave, shackled to the most worth- less ambition that ever dulled a soul. The pace the monotonous, unvarying schedule the grinding, binding, blinding self-drive the steady trudging onward un- der the lash of his own will, have so worn him and torn him that his nerves are peep- ing through their threadbare coats by day, spoiling his temper and his digestion; by 35 Herbert Kaufman The Failure night, squirming and twisting at his peace as he begs them for the relaxation of calm sleep* Life has cheated him by teaching him to cheat himself. The fruits of success have never been sweet upon his lips he has only tasted the bitter rind* His mind is channeled and all his thoughts run in one deep groove the same sorts of thoughts in the same groove* The only book he knows is his ledger. He has never permitted Ruskin to carry him along the canals of Venice and re-weave the tapestry of the Renaissance* Nor under the magic spell of "Idylls of the King" has he seated himself in the lists of chivalry where Sir Lancelot would gladly joust for his pleasure. Michelangelo and Titian have wrought in their fine frenzy of genius, but his eyes have never known the glories of their master craft. The Alps have poked their frosted old noses into the clouds Lugano has purled and sobbed against her rocks the sun has painted purple the white walls of Tangier every day since he possessed the 36 The Failure key to his liberty, bat the chains have The Failure never dropped from his ankles long enough for him to paint their majesty upon the canvas of his memory* He is the most abject failure that ever succeeded in life* And yet you have envied him and wished to stand in his stead* You have paused before his marble cell and cursed the fortune which denied you the right to have what he possesses his worthless hoard of unspent and unspendable money* He can buy a thousand shares of Steel as readily as you can purchase a crimson cravat he can own the site of a city as easily as you can take title to your allotted six foot of peace-earth. But with all of his wealth he can't buy what you possess youth, and the opportunity to turn existence into life* Fate is old and wise and cunning and cruel. Every time she thinks of him she grins* Every time she looks at him she winks* She has made him overpay. She has sold at the price of gold and loaded him 37 Herbert Kaufman The Failure down with riches which at his possession have changed from preciousness into use- lessness. Now it's too late* He's too old to know* All the mystery and the charm and the marvel of things all the poetry and beauty and wonder of his days are gone. He ran by them too fast to read only the last chapters are before him he can't turn back the pages of Life* For thirty years he planned "tomorrow" the only thing in the world that never arrives. At twenty he could have found joy t at thirty enjoy- ment, at forty amusement, but at fifty he can't play* He has deadened every sense except that of acquisition, and wealth unused is merely poverty. The next time you pass his home, think it over the laugh is on him you're the rich man* 38 We don't want to help you because assistance doesn't aid. Props merely show inability to stand alone. We're kindest to you when we make you prove when we force you to get past handicaps. Jumpers are developed by setting hurdles. 39 DON'T STOP AT THE START Get away from the big mob of little men and come on up. Nobody has yet managed to fill out the space between here and the stars. There's nothing but room overhead. Competition is intense only down below. The hardest struggle is the beginning. The outset of life is the biggest trial. The start takes more time than the race. If you're sure that nothing will stop you nothing can stop you. So long as the spirit of fight is in you t you're like a throbbing motor as soon as you can get belted to opportunity you're sure to drive things. Everything unusual had to be waited for* The man who built the Washington monu- ment simply piled his stone higher than anyone else he merely kept his head clear 41 Herbert Kaufman Don't Stop anc * k* s W0f k straight. What is crooked at the falls. A straight line is always the shortest. Start If you doubt it, try to recall anybody who ever got anything or anywhere in any other way. Roundabout short cuts simply make you turn back and start anew. Being honest is the greater part of achievement* When you know that you're doing the best within you, you can't be downed. Self respect is an eternal life preserver no matter how often circum- stance wrecks you, you're bound to float back to solid ground again. Success can't be inherited if you've been handed power or wealth and can't reproduce it of your own accord, you're worse off than the man who had to build both for himself. He can repeat his fortune because he has the tools of experience with which to re-create* All really big men carved their way with their own muscles and their own brains and their own determination* Mansions and palaces don't incubate producers. The masters of the world moulded their 42 Don't Stop at the Start own destinies they grew great, step by Don't Stop step and year by year. They stayed great at the because each inch of their progress was a Start contest with somebody else, until they had defeated, by sheer ability, every opponent. Timber can only be seasoned oat in the open where the bad weather can get to work on it it rots under a shed* The need and hunger and want of things seasoned three poor, ignorant boys into Lincoln, Field and Edison. They became enduring through the opposition of men who already had what they wanted they became forceful by trying and trying until the last trial was met. We don't want to help you because as- sistance doesn't aid. Props merely show inability to stand alone. We're kindest to you when we make you prove when we force you to get past handicaps. Jumpers are developed by setting hurdles. We can't know that you're true-blue until you have stood some of the rains of life and realize that your colors don't run. 43 Herbert Kaufman Don't Stop When we assist you least, we befriend you at the most we're teaching you self-development* Start It's kinder to kick you than to coddle you, because it gives you a chance to kick back and every time your kicking is harder, you gain additional belief in your own power* Don't stop because the start tires you you'll soon get used to the strain. The cavalry recruit must stick in the saddle and ride until he doesn't mind the jolting. The oarsman must keep rowing until his blisters grow into callouses. Keeping on is the whole trick. The pace is secondary it will develop as you pro- gress. Speed without lasting-power is wasted. It wasn't the fastest beginner that won the Olympian Marathon. Legs didn't pro- duce the victor but grit. It was the man whose courage didn't wobble when his knees did whose tenacity kept him going and held his chest back and his head high* It was the spirit of "I Will" that drove him to the end nothing else really counted. 44 What goes into the past comes out of the future. Carelessness won't ripen into suc- cess. Laziness won't fructify into ease. Trickery won't breed eminence. 45 THERE'S JUST ONE EASY ROAD The man who lies down and the man who lies up and down eventually stay down the one won't deliver what's expected of him the other can't* They both want to buy success at illegal rates they're taking too much discount* There's just one easy road the hard, straight way. The little off-cuts the smooth, twisting side paths, only seem safe, they're not meant to be walked on. Ever since human folk began to reason, a certain percentage of misguided idiots have tried to get ahead by cutting over the quicksands. Occasionally some unusual man (who would have done twice as well if he'd "done" one-half as many) realizes fifty per cent on his ability-investment by "getting away" with more than the law 47 Herbert Kaufman There's allows, btrt even when he does hold it, he Just One lets g of something worth more he over- Easy Road pays he loses his self-respect. The card sharper can't expect to retain both the cash and confidence of the com- munity. The cheat can buy a few minor luxuries, but he must forego the real necessities of life. There are many things we never list as assets and only weigh when they've gone away which we only ap- preciate when they're out of reach. Money won't purchase more than food and clothes and excitement peace, security and happi- ness aren't marketed as yet, in the shops. Life's just a matter of farming of finding fertile soil in a good field of breaking ground and being patient. The harvesting comes last the main work must be done while the least results are showing. Many a man has lost out just because he wasn't patient enough to wait until well planted endeavor had time to sprout. Thousands of careers have been ruined because a few bad habits weren't weeded out of a strong nature. 48 There's Just One Easy Road It's far better to endure a little depriva- There's tion during yotrth than much privation in Just One old age. Springtime is the sowing season Easy Road you can't replant in winter* What goes into the past comes out of the future* Care- lessness won't ripen into success. Laziness won't fructify into ease* Trickery won't breed eminence. Millionaires are un-made t not created at the gaming table* Every Wall Street for- tune is built out of a thousand Wall Street misfortunes. Most of the men who buy silver-plated harness today wore work- plated harness for a great many yesterdays* Science has accomplished a lot of new things with water-power and air-power but hasn't improved on man-power. Nothing so far t in the history of humanity, has been discovered as an acceptable substitute for honest, steady labor. Old Cyrus Simmons built a sizeable town before he stopped building wagons. He planned a great many stylish rigs in his day and some rules the rules hadn't much style to 'em, but they were as solid as his 49 Herbert Kaufman There's wheels they didn't wobble; Whenever a Just One candidate for future partnership stopped at Easy Road the cashier's window for his first week's pay-envelope, in addition to his wages he found a little red card of rules* Cyrus didn't copyright the rules t so you'll get a chance to profit by them, too* Rule I* Don't lie it wastes my time and yours. I'm sure to catch you in the end and that's the wrong end* Rule II. Watch your work, not the clock. A long day's work makes a long day short and a day's short work makes my face long. Rule III* Give me more than I expect and I'll pay you more than you expect* I can afford to increase your pay if you in- crease my profits* Rule IV* You owe so much to yourself that you can't afford to owe anybody else. Keep out of debt or keep out of my shops* Rule V. Dishonesty is never an accident. Good men, like good women, can't see temptation when they meet it 50 There's Just One Easy Road Rule VI. Mind your own business and There's in time you'll have a business of your own Just One to mind* Easy Road Rule VII* Don't do anything here which hurts your self-respect* The employe who is willing to steal for me is capable of steal- ing from me* Rule VIII. It's none of my business what you do at night, BUT if dissipation affects what you do next day and you do half as much as I demand, you'll last half as long as you hoped* Rule IX* Don't tell me what I'd like to hear, but what I ought to hear* I don't want a valet to my vanity, but I need lots of them for my dollars. Rule X. Don't kick if I kick if you're worth while correcting, you're worth while keeping. I don't waste time cutting specks out of rotten apples. Do not think that you can spend your way into better circles houses with admittance prices are not homes, but business shops. Where money is a latchkey, insincerity is always host. 53 THE SNOB The Snob always unmasks himself* His setting can't possibly alter his paste nature* He's an imitation. Education may cut him into the proper form and give him a false polish, but what he's made of isn't changed by the process. Real culture comes from within. His own emphasis raises the question of his genuineness. His loudness doesn't con- vince; it only convicts. He doesn't set himself in a higher class he only reminds people that he has just left a lower one* Life is filled with elevations, upon which men have been set by forces quite beyond their own control. It may be that a post of eminence permits you to look down on others but that doesn't signify that they belong below you or that you're fit to be looked up to perhaps it's the thing on 55 Herbert Kaufman The Snob which you stand at which folks are gazing* You may be an insignificant ornament on a pedestal far disproportionate to your size. If you have inherited something without inheriting the qualities which produced it, you deserve no especial notice* Folks who profit by accident usually show it in their attitude toward those whom they esteem their inferiors they make the great mistake of thinking that a big head rather than a big heart is the sign of a big man. Greatness can't lose any part of itself by simplicity that's the stuff it's made of. A gentleman is nothing more than a gentle man. No amount of green in your pocket can put a drop of blue in your veins money can't make you attractive it can merely attract people who want your money and not you. There are so many mean ways of getting rich and so many objection- able individuals are wealthy, that a bank balance alone won't balance your lack of culture or refinement. College may teach you form contact may rub some things away; but breeding, like 56 The Snob a complexion, is more than a surface The Snob unless it's real t it only makes one wonder what's really underneath. When it is as- sumed, it's bound to wear off from time to time. Men and women who are born to position show it by not showing it off they aren't conscious of being different except when coarseness^ forces them to realize that they are of another ilk. They only know that they are above the average through contact with some one below it. They are born with their status and incomes just as they come into the world with their limbs. They no more exult over their goods or lineage than you thank Providence for two arms instead of one the sole time you realize that you are better off than you might be, is when you meet with a cripple. Only pushers advertise their competency, and by the irony of Fate, having attained any sort of standing, they immediately lose it through a display of satisfaction which brands them as strangers in the fold. When Lord Southcliff received word 57 Herbert Kaufman The Snob from a former valet that he had been plunged into sudden grief and millions through the death of an Australian uncle, he undertook to offer him a few words of advice: "Do not think that you can spend your way into better circles houses with ad- mittance prices are not homes, but business shops. Where money is a latchkey, in- sincerity is always host/* "Those who do not welcome you for what you are, simply tolerate you for what you have/' "Refuse any attentions which you are not privileged to return and any hospitality which you will not be permitted to reciprocate/' "Make no pretense and you will not be met with pretense/' "Exhibit the same reserve which char- acterized you as a good servant and the world will quickly forget that you ever were one/' 58 It isn't the broken shaft that cnpples the most machinery and shuts down the works; it's the little nut on the little bolt that works loose and throws all the rest of the mechan- ism into a jumble. 59 JOHNNY AND OTHER LOOSE SCREWS Watch the little screws and the big wheels will take care of themselves. It isn't the broken shaft that cripples the most machinery and shuts down the works; it's the little nut on the little bolt that works loose and throws all the rest of the mechan- ism into a jumble; it's the little men in the little posts the minor employes the office boys and the petty clerks who tangle up the great systems* For instance, there's Johnny. Last week you dictated a four-page letter covering every detail of your deal with X; for days you were in consultation with your at- torneys and your managers; you canceled your bridge game at the club Friday night to carefully review all the documents in the matter; you verified every statement and you remained downtown an hour longer 61 Herbert Kaufman Johnny than usual in order to be sure that the and Other stenographer corrected the mistakes in Loose your dictation; then you handed the letter Screws to johnny to post. And Johnny lost it or took it home with him, intending to drop it in the box at his own corner, but forgot, and kept on forgetting until an angry letter, protesting against your slipshod methods, gave you the first intimation that there was a muss-up* Another screw loose. Or there's Andrews, the billing clerk, who tries to upset the laws of nature and demonstrate that one brain can properly consider two subjects at the same time; if Andrews were that gifted he wouldn't be drawing fifteen per in your accounting de- partment; the world of vast affairs would be coveting him* Andrews thinks that he can discuss the baseball prospects while he makes out his statements. And so Blank Brothers (whose account you have managed to land after three years of effort) wrote in on Tuesday criticising the methods of a concern which didn't know when its discounts had been taken, and informed you that, in 62 Johnny and Other Loose Screws future, they would place their orders with Johnny a firm possessing more gumption than to and Other send a dun to a customer whose account Loose was up-to-date. Andrews is a fearfully Screws expensive luxury at his salary. If there is a pink slip in either of their envelopes next Saturday, chances are there'll be two more to swell the snarl that "a fellow hasn't a chance nowadays." Poor Johnny and poor Andrews you'll never understand; you'll never know that you've had your chance and that you didn't deserve it; you'll go stumbling and fumbling through life neglecting your op- portunities as they arise, never realizing that success is measured by a man's daily record that a ladder of well done little things leads to the big posts up top. The start is all that counts; the thread of destiny is wound upon such a fat spool that no one man ever had the time within the span of one life to get to its end. But you break the thread at the outset. You lack steadiness; you don't learn your corre- lation with the rest of the works. You 63 Herbert Kaufman Johnny can't grasp the scheme of growth that and Other success begins as a bad and that the Loose ripened fruit of fortune will never be yours rews if you kill the blossom of chance by the early frost of neglect. You are being weighed and measured every hour; you are under a constant test, a test by' which you can prove yourself* Carelessness is the only thing which can be always regulated by your own actions, and carelessness is the one thing that will not be forgiven. Anything else can be ex- plained; errors of judgment are but human (even Napoleon made them), but laziness, indifference, disobedience to orders these deserve no mercy and receive none. A ten-year-old boy saved all Holland from re-becoming a part of the sea; he found one little hole in the dyke which pro- tected the Netherlands from the ocean; he stuck his finger in the hole and saved the centuries of work which had rendered safe his country. There are holes in every business dyke, 64 Johnny and Other Loose Screws little leaks through which failure can work Johnny its way and sweep down all that effort and and Other honesty and purpose have achieved* It is Loose you who make the holes; you, Johnny, and Screws you, Andrews. Paste this on your walls of memory. 65 Half of greatness is grit. When intelligence is backed up by the deter- mination not to back down, the only thing under the sun that is impossible is something that can't be imagined. 67 IMPOSSIBILITIES ARE THE FAIL- URES OF LAZY MEN Impossibilities are merely the half -hearted efforts of quitters. The man who won't go through to the finish has finished at the start. If he hasn't pluck enough to hang on, he must hang back. We can't afford to regulate the pace of progress to accom- modate the laggard. The lazy man has always failed in every spot and in everything. He's a weed in the way of a producer. He absorbs more than he earns. He checks the growth of well-planted endeavor. He's a sterile seed. The winds of fortune may drift him successively to a dozen rich soils, but no matter where he lands, he's useless. Even when he does meet opportunity he 69 Herbert Kaufman Impossibil- doesn't know it* He can't tell the differ- ities are ence between good luck and a case of the Failures measles. The steady, ready worker never com- plains. He's too busy trying to better his condition. When a man is doing his level best he always finds life on the level. When you meet a howler who blames his environ ' dent* his generation, his fellows, his country, you find a man who has failed in himself. Not geography nor time nor en- vironment can hold down a fighter. The right type of man will start a grove of fig trees in a desert. Failure isn't a disease of locality it's a personal habit. Anybody can get a steady living out of steady effort. The same clock that ticks off twenty-four hours for one man can't cheat his neighbor. The same laws of right and wrong, the same privilege to do and dare, are open to both. All through the continent, old counties are changing their aspects. The stock- 70 Impossibilities are the Failures of Lazy Men breeder who wasted fourteen acres of prairie Impossibil- upon one steer must hand over that land ities are to a newcomer who can make it support the Failures fourteen humans and the steer* azvivien Prairie sections which once went begging for buyers at a dollar an acre are now bear- ing enough cotton and cane and truck and fruit to raise their value a hundredfold. The same soil was there all the while. It was always worth a hundred times as much as its selling price, but not to the owner who wouldn't find it out. The man who looks hard enough will find enough to repay him. Only the worker lasts. Carelessness and indifference and neglect are not timbers for the builder. There are no free passes over the modern road. Fortune has an interstate commerce law of her own she won't deadhead any- one. Everybody who ever did anything, any- where, had to find the grindstone and run himself against it until he developed an edge that would cut something. 71 Herbert Kaufman Impossibil- Half of greatness is grit* When intelli- ities are gence is backed up by the determination the Failures not to back down, the only thing tinder the ofLazyMen stm that j s impossible is something that can't be imagined. 72 There are countless things which he will not do f or thesake of money , because he knows how few real things money 73 THE MAN WHO IS A GENTLEMAN He remembers his own mother and is therefore considerate in thought and deed of all her sex. He neither degrades them by act nor by word* He will not titter a lie about a woman, but if need arise and he may thereby spare her hurt, he will gladly lie in her cause. He indulges in no excesses. He is master of his appetites, and does not lose control of his passions, his judgment or his voice. He estimates no man except through his own experience, and then he forbears to pass judgment until he is certain, of his knowledge. He does not spread scandal, nor does he permit it within his hearing. What does not affect himself he remem- bers to forget. 75 Herbert Kaufman The Man He does no wrong but what he im- Who is a mediately seeks to right it t and with his Gentleman O wn hands. He is as eager to apologize as he is loath to offend and is always anxious to acknowl- edge an error. He does not mistake words for deeds; therefore his politeness is more than a polish. His given word is his pledged bond, and the bad faith of another never justifies its default any more than the theft of his own property by a neighbor would lead him to retaliate in kind. He obtrudes neither his religion nor his politics, recognizing the right of every man to his sincere beliefs. He is never an objective critic, and when he passes criticism he does so with a full appreciation of its favorable as well as its derogatory function. He bestows charity with a smile, and then seeks to erase the sense of obligation in those whom he assists. He advertises neither his good works nor his attainments* 76 The Man Who is a Gentleman He is gracious to all of lowly station or of The Man advanced years, and never flaunts his better Who is a fortune before his inferiors* Gentleman He makes ostentation neither of his pos- sessions nor his culture, realizing that his opportunities may have given him advan- tages which less favorable surroundings might not have produced* He discusses his grievances with no one, not wishing to inflict his essentially personal worries upon his fellows. He is cleanly of habit and of tongue, and prefers to find the world as himself* He trades neither upon his name nor his birth, nor does he traffic in the power or influence of his friends* , He does not prostitute his honor to bus- iness profit, nor does he request his woman folk to sacrifice their personal inclinations in the cause of his advancement* He asks no man to perform any service which he could not and would not perform without smirch to his own self-respect* He regards wealth as a pleasant posses- 77 Herbert Kaufman The Man sion, btrt one which does not justify the Who is a cancellation of a single attribute of honor. Gentleman Jhcrc ^ cotmtlcss things which hc will not do for the sake of money, because he knows how few real things money can do in return. Above all else, he is a gentle man* 78 Don't water the weeds of sorrow. They thrive on your tears. Dry up, and they will. Root them out of the garden of Memory and give Hope a chance to grow in their place. 79 DON'T WATER THE WEEDS OF SORROW Don't water the weeds of sorrow. They thrive on your tears. Dry up* and they will. Root them otrt of the garden of Memory and give Hope a chance to grow in their place. Yesterday is trtterly over with Time is the only thing in this life which can be completely destroyed. The dead days always bury the past with them. They are back of you you have journeyed over that stage of the road* Don't retrace your steps go forward to happiness. What can you possibly gain for yourself or for anyone else, by coaxing and fondling pain? No man returns his hand to the fire that burned it he isn't fool enough to think that he can ease the hurt bv thrusting 81 Herbert Kaufman Don't *t again into the flame. If memory harts Water the you, don't return your soul to the torture. Weeds of Control yourself find diversion w o r k Sorrow har(fcn Don't encourage expressions of sympathy any more than you would ask folks to jab their fingers into a physical bruise. Don't grow morbid get out into the world. The new days are waiting for you calling to you they are breaking in the East of life, and in their span there are songs as mellow and golden and joys as great as those of any Yesterday. But you will not see or hear them if you constantly blind yourself with the images of bitterness and deafen yourself with sobs. Don't allow your gloom to befog the sun- shine of others. Don't be selfish. When you remember things which cannot be helped and forget the help which you owe to others, you don't lighten your own burdens one iota, but on the other hand you multiply them and uselessly force their load upon innocent shoulders. 82 Don't Water the Weeds of Sorrow They who bring cheer with them find Don't cheer they who come with peace obtain Water the peace. Weeds of Sorrow Woes and wounds are alike they must be closed before they can be healed. You must learn the Great Lesson. For thousands piled on thousands of years, men and women have undergone all that you have suffered they have met with every- thing that you have faced they have prized as dearly as you have prized and lost as utterly as you have lost. They have been forced to find their courage just as you must find yours* It's tucked away somewhere in a corner of your being waiting for you to take hold of it. All that it needs is a bit of exercise. It's a mere muscle of the soul it grows stronger every time that you work it. It tightens up all your sagging nature it takes the warp out of your resolution it tautens your energy it sets your brain working and as it becomes active your mind will cast off its malaria. 83 Don't Water the Weeds of Sorrow Herbert Kaufman You are still full of strength, but you must call upon it. Happiness is worth fighting for the contest lies solely with yourself* Begin now to grapple with your will. Go to the window and lift the shade look out and up the sun is there eager to come to you* 84 Spurts don't count. The final score makes no mention of a splendid start if the finish proves that you were an "also ran. 85 THE MAN WITH THE FIXED IDEA Make your chart before you start choose your destination before you buy your ticket* Don't wait until you reach the end of your journey and then decide where you're going. Many a man has dried up in a little way-side opportunity, merely because he lacked the courage to acknowledge to himself that his judgment had landed him in the wrong spot. You can't tell what you're best fitted to do until you've fought for a few things fit for the fighting* Now and then, rifles accidentally hit bull's-eyes, but remember that every championship record is the result of lots of practice and a good, steady aim. C. Columbus did finally stumble onto America after much aimless wandering, but don't forget that a great many of his pre- 87 Herbert Kaufman The Man decessors went down in the Atlantic gales With the because they set sail without a definite port Fixed Idea before them. The builder who hasn't decided how high he will run his walls before he digs his foundations, takes too much of a chance- he's apt to make his foundations entirely too weak to support the "afterwork." Know what you are after before you start out for it* The "pig in the poke" system is dangerous the pig is apt to bite your hand just as often as your hand is likely to grab the pig. Don't rely on accident to start you accident doesn't run on schedule and hasn't a habit of happening in the same spot twice. The Fixed Idea is the motive power that has driven most men to attain- ment more plodders than geniuses have reached eminence. The sail-boat without a keel usually capsizes the man without a keel is unsafe. Persistence and doggedness oftenest bring results. Hard work is com- mon coin in the realm of Success. The musician who aspires to become a 88 The Man With the Fixed Idea maestro must look down to years of The Man practice before he can look up to the hour With the of acclaim, and once he has received recog- Fixed Idea nit ion he must keep practicing just as hard to hold it* The gift of music and the love of harmony are only half it's "the fixed idea" which keeps his fingers on the keys* hour after hour, day after day, that brings him to his goal. The lawyer and the illustrator and the scientist must all pay the same price* The master of railroads must strive just as earnestly and centralize his efforts just as intensely today, as when he was grasping for control* You must make sure of what you want to do you must feel sure that you have the courage as well as the temperament to do it and then Do It!! One fair idea unhesitatingly followed out is better than a dozen excellent plans none of which receive concentrated attention* Spurts don't count* The final score makes no mention of a splendid start if the finish proves that you were an "also ran," 89 Herbert Kaufman The Man Only the steady last. Call to mind a With the dozen men who have made their mark- Fixed Idea choose them from trade or profession and you'll find that at least ten out of the twelve were men who hung fast to a "fixed idea" who held on despite setback and reverse who endured self-denial and diffi- culties and won out because they didn't "peter out." They believed in themselves - they thought that they could do a certain thing and counted what they believed far more than the concentrated opinion of everybody else. The World didn't take them seriously in the beginning, but they took themselves seriously and in the end the World changed its mind. It always does change its mind when a man makes good. But the World's so old, and has had so much experience with the human race, that it puts every man down to a basis of zero and only acknowledges that he's above it when his gauge moves up to the mark that his own confidence has set and his own ability attained* 90 The friction of men in action is the energy that sends the world spin- ning. Disagreements are like flint and steel, they strike the new sparks. Contrary opin- ions flail the chaff out of ideas. THE MAN YOU MUSTN'T TRUST He extends the "glad" hand and tries to pass it off as the helping hand. He's too pleasing to prove a pleasant acquaintance. Like a chameleon, he changes his personal- ity in harmony with his surroundings* He has no ideals, no ambitions and no prin- ciples, but what he's willing to alter for the sake of self-interest. He wears his convic- tions as other men wear their collars and changes them just about as often. He tries to be everybody's friend and winds up by being nobody's. Necessarily he's an out and out hypocrite. What he really thinks or wants he never tells he plans every speech and only says such things as he feels you wish to hear. He is absolutely untrustworthy. He is unwilling to make enemies and thereby proves himself a weakling strong men are 93 Herbert Kaufman The Man known by their quarrels by their intoler- You ance of unprincipled actions and unworthy Mustn't ideals* He must be partly a sneak, a great deal of a liar and somewhat dishonest, because men differ so widely in their standards, that to make himself agreeable at all times, to all persons, he must sympathize with many things and actions which a man of indi- viduality is forced to resent* His friendship is not practical is not rigged for stormy seas it's a sort of stage affair intended only for show* He's a human kaleidoscope whom every- one sees differently, and since no two men ever get exactly the same view of him, the great opportunities of life never come his way. Nobody can tell which of them is really he. When men strive for posts of trust, they must be somewhat post-like themselves and stand steady* So you see, after all, he deceives no one so sadly as himself. He takes so many chances with human nature that he fails to get his own chance. He agrees with both 94 The Man You Mustn't Trust parties in disagreements encourages op- The Man posite sentiments in discussions he's a You chronic Colossus of Rhodes, attempting to Mustn t be on both sides at the same time t and t inasmuch as deceit is sure to be discovered, he loses both footholds and falls between. He is always a flatterer* His speech is a verbal anesthetic with which he seeks to put men's common sense to sleep while he operates upon their sane judgment. His advice is worthless, because he thinks with his tongue and not with his heart* He has no aim except his own, but he fails eventually, because he cannot be forceful* The power to inspire belief can only spring from sincerity. No hypocrite ever became and remained a leader. Oh, it doesn't pay to be "everybody's friend" it's too impossible* Try some- thing easier, such as upsetting the laws of nature, by squaring a circle or by growing wheat on the ocean or making two and two total eleven. Only a certain number of humans were ever meant to coincide in temperament* 95 Herbert Kaufman The Man The friction of men in action is the energy You that sends the world spinning, Disagree- Mustn't ments are like flint and steel, they strike the new sparks. Contrary opinions flail the chaff out of ideas. Old Jed Judson used to say, "I like a man who fights me. He teaches me and helps me. If he's strong enough to bang the everlasting tar out of my hide, I get a chance to find out where I was weaker than I thought. If I can put him down, Tm doubly sure of myself. These here fellows all the time handing you boxes of word candy don't go with me. I don't take no stock in over-sociable folk. They remind me of hunters calling as pleasantly as pos- sible to a female turkey, for purposes dif- ferent from what the blamed fool fowl thinks/' 96 Your diploma is just a phonograph trade-mark it simply tells us what has been pressed into your mind but it does not say what you will do when you attempt to make an independent record 97 TO THE COLLEGE GRADUATE You have heard the salutatories and the valedictories the gorgeous gushes of Dr. This and the Hon. That have jiggled along your vertebrae. Upon the wings of their fancy you have soared into the empyrean, proud in the consciousness that you are of the world's elect a rose instead of a thorn, a mental satrap among the unlettered helots. Panoplied in academic burganet, cuirass, and jamb, you stand in your armor of erudition, valiantly grasping the lance of knowledge, while you strain to hear the fanfare calling you to the lists whither Minerva has summoned you as her true defender and pledged knight, and Why, bless me, there's the alarm clock! It's half-past get-down-to-hardpan. Where is the want page? H'ml quite a lack of 99 Herbert Kaufman To the five thousand-dollar posts suffering from College loneliness, and those jobs which are yearn- Cjraduate j ng f or occupancy all seem to lay stress on such an unimportant thing as Experience* Ridiculous, ain't it, in this, the twentieth century? What shortsighted manufacturers, what ignorant merchants, what foolish cor- porations! Not even specifying that the first requisite of the applicant shall be a college degree! Why, if they only knew your grasp of Chauvenet, the facility with which you parse the intricacies of Thucydides, the grace that characterizes your scansion of the Epodes of Horace, and your comprehension of Locke and Spinoza, the postman on your block would have to carry an extra sack of mail from the hundreds of organizations wearing long-distance glasses, searching for oases such as yourself! But since all these gentlemen of trade and industry are not brothers to Asmodeus, and their vision cannot pierce the walls of your bedroom where hangs the sonorously worded diploma that glorifies your name, JOO To the College Graduate it is quite probable that you will be forced To the to go ahead like perfectly ordinary young College men t and "get there" by "going some/' Graduate And by the way, it may be just as well if you don't lay too much stress on Spinoza the world of affairs has not as yet learned to appreciate the advantages of men who just KNOW things* It understands only men who KNOW and DO, The most that you can hope for is con- sideration as a piece of superior metal a pig of iron that has passed through the process of refining* Your degree is just the foundry mark* As you stand, your brain is practically useless; it has been pressed into a standard mold of thought, and is exactly like that of ten thousand other young men who read the same textbooks and listened to the same lectures and were dominated by the same theories* You possess absolutely no value either to commerce or to art, except that of un- wrought material* Your future depends upon your plasticity and tensility your ability to conform with conditions as you 101 Herbert Kaufman To the meet with them, to cope with emergencies College as they meet with you, and the stamina Graduate vrfth which you will stand the strain of action* You cannot become a ruler through just knowing rules; you must fit principles to something practical before Success even begins to flick an eye in your direction. If you have simply absorbed and cannot radiate, you won't get half so far as Smith on the next block, who jumped school at twelve with three ideas in his head and the power to get them over* Of course, we know that you have committed to mind all the memorable dates of history; but the question is whether you will be able to make a date memorable for history* You may be familiar with the ora- tions of Cicero; but have you drawn into your soul and your blood the principles that lay back of them? You are not unusual; in fact, a mer- chant would mark you "standard size" and label you "regular." J02 To the College Graduate You have been nurtured upon the pre- To the digested thought t upon ideas and ideals College that have been funneled into your brain Graduate theories that other men dug from fact. You have merely been a listener, a human sponge, absorbing the experiences of others* The world cannot find you very useful in your present form; you must be milled* You are wheat in the husk your brain is over-coated with a chaff which must first be eliminated and differentiated by good, hard whacks of common sense* Life and living must flail you until your avail- able wisdom is sequestrated from that which is valueless to us* You must pass through a process of subtraction before you will be considered an addition to any organization. You have been busily engaged in learn- ing things; now you must start in to un- learn some of them* You must create; up to now you have only secreted* Your diploma is just a phonograph trade- mark it simply tells us what has been 103 Herbert Kaufman To the pressed into your mind? btrt it does not College say what you will do when you attempt Graduate to make an independent record* You have no individuality it has had no arena in which it could find expression. A singer cannot enter grand opera on the strength of his training, but merely on the strength of his voice* No one cares a tinkers dam what method he followed, if results have not followed the method. It is assumed that you will be impetuous and crusade against precedent; that you will jump at conclusions and attempt to upset procedures that practice has found sound. The business world anticipates the neces- sity of toning you down. You will pass through months of false humiliation and hurt; your pride will quiver and pain, and your self-esteem will be black and blue with bruises; but after the foundry marks have been filed off of you, and you have learned some of the lessons of life after you understand how to measure men, not for what they know, but for what they 104 To the College Graduate do; not for what they assume, but for To the what they accomplish after you have College realized that your college training is merely Graduate a course of mental calisthenics to develop clear thinking, logical reasoning, and noth- ing else after you have been set down at the bottom and have forced your way up then you will begin to be of some value to yourself and the world. 105 Lack of appreciation is the incubator which has hatched thousands of employes into em- ployers. Injustice has driven into independ- ence half the success- ful men in America. 107 WATCH OUT FOR THE MAN BEHIND Today is yours, but tomorrow belongs to The Man Behind. He's back there pushing and struggling and fighting on he's gritting his teeth and keeping in action, so he's in better shape than you the exercise of effort is keeping him alert thinning down his limbs pasting his muscles tighter to the bone twisting gristle into the meat Look out for him! You haven't worked at full vigor of late* There's an overcoat of fat growing around your intellect if he ever gets up to you and it comes down to a stern, hard con- test you won't last. Activity doesn't tire it hardens gives resisting power develops the wind teaches one to stay when the tussle becomes intense. There's many a man in your office carrying the undeveloped seed of achievement in his make-up. He's fertilizing it with his am- bition and some day results are going to J09 Herbert Kaufman Watch out grow otrt of it See to it that you get the for the Man harvest. Behind y^e time may come when you'll need loyalty as badly as the Texas bad-man needed his "Colt." He left it at home on the piano t but the sheriff couldn't afford to overlook the chance of getting him at a disadvantage. Your competitors are always watching and waiting they're seeking an oppor- tunity to "get in." You may have to rely for survival upon the fidelity of the man behind. You won't get it if you haven't earned it. There are two sides to every question and like the flap-jack, the bottom gets on top in the turn-over. Your staff only owes you that which you have bought. If you've taken advantage of circumstances in his hour of weakness, depend upon it, when somebody else offers him more money, no man in your employ will stick- he isn't in your debt by one throb of con- sideration. Lack of appreciation is the incubator which has hatched thousands of employes into employers. Injustice has no Watch out for the Man Behind driven into independence half the sue- Watch out cessful men in America* for the Man Forests die out unless there is a con- stant growth of saplings they can only be perpetuated by the seeds which drop from the trees that have already grown up* Don't forget that your young men are seed that they are your insurance against the future that you must look to them for the timber of to-morrow. Take care of them* You may not need them now* but as the years pass and your own powers fail, and you can no longer stand the gaff as today, the skill and knowledge and confidence which you breed into those surrounding you now, will protect your past efforts and warrant the continuance of prosperity for your family. Hold on to your sound boys they're worth more to you than anyone else, be- cause they are more valuable to every other employer than you. When they go away they are like bees, covered with fructifying pollen they fly off with the ability they gained from you, and use it \\\ Herbert Kaufman Watch out against you* When they enter another for the Man office, they handicap you by their with- Behind drawal and strengthen your rivals with their knowledge of your secrets. When you replace them, you must pay as much for their successors, break them in and afterwards give battle to the very strength that you allowed to desert your flag. Carnegie is giving away libraries be- cause he was shrewd enough to make every potential antagonist a partner. He drove his bargains when their strength was not at its fullest pitch, and he put them under - the yoke of mutual interest while their brains were freshest and could tone up his staling view-point he made his own per- centage smaller, but he magnified his total profits so tremendously that a part of twenty men's earnings far exceeded what his lone efforts would have brought, had he tried to hog it all. A small interest at an early enough moment creates a lifetime ally it buys you a man's play-time and night-time thoughts, all his plans and ambitions. It 112 Watch out for the Man Behind creates a burden-sharer who will lift cares, Watch otrt the shifting of which is worth far more for the Man than the cost* It gives you a sense of Behind future security, unknown to the lone operator, who lives in the constant dread that he will be hardest pressed when he is least efficient. U3 Real men play the game of life with unmarked cards the tattler, like every other cur, discloses his breed by the manner in which he carries his tale. 115 THE TATTLER The main difference between a tattler and a rattler is that the snake gives the other fellow a show and the sneak won't* In other respects they're pretty much alike, barring the small matter of an "e," The man who won't stand in the open and make his accusations where they can be defended, proves that he not only lacks courage, but also the courage of his con- victions* He's a coward his work is always signed his mark is "the stab in the back/' Sincerity never bred a tale-bearer. Real men play the game of life with unmarked c*rds the tattler, like every other cur, discloses his breed by the manner in which he carries his tale. He sometimes deceives himself with the thought that he is doing good, but it is U7 Herbert Kaufman The n t in his nature to be disinterested; the Tattler personal element constantly enters into his motives his tongue is poisoned with the venom of envy he's jaundiced his spleen is full of jealousy he can't digest the thought of anybody else's success or superiority* Unable to climb as high as he aspires, he attempts to pull down the ladders of ability upon which better men are mount- ing* But the assassin of reputations must in the end bear the punishment which the world has always inflicted upon slimy, crawling things its utter disgust. Jus- tice, although blindfolded, slips the band- age from her eyes, when her sensitive hand feels a cheating finger trying to weigh down the scales the average run of human- ity will not convict upon one-sided evidence. Ever since little Bobbie was caught emptying the jam pot and smearing the pup's nose in the jar, folks have realized how deceptive appearances can be made. The mud-thrower stains himself with JJ8 The Tattler the mire which is his weapon; he smirches The his own hands whenever he delves into Tattler slander. Spies have never been popular. They who fight in the dark do not shine in the light. The scavenger belongs to the lowest caste of society; gossip-mongers, like other collectors of the unpleasant, are de trop in decent circles. Even a thief is one step higher than an informer, and refuses to lower himself to the infamy of betrayal. The more we learn of life, the more we consider that a tale-bearer is not to be trusted the instinct which leads him to divulge one confidence, will, if the chance permit, impel him to make use of any other information which comes within his knowledge* He stamps himself as dangerous. As his reputation spreads, his opportunities contract; positions of importance cannot be given into his care; and, so, tho* he may be gifted sufficiently to perform duties of consequence, the certainty that he will Herbert Kaufman The divulge crucial secrets shuts him out from Tattler openings which he might otherwise secure. Men must have the friendship and co- operation of their fellows to achieve be- yond the ordinary, and the tattler soon becomes a pariah every man's hand is reaching out to keep him down* Our repugnance is so great against any type of traitor that it begins to manifest itself in childhood even the kindergarten prattlers ostracize the school-room tell-tale. J20 Demosthenes was one stutterer who became a great orator, but most stutterers have their mouths full when they try to follow conversa- tion, much less lead it. J2J ALL MEN ARE NOT BORN EQUAL Nature doesn't cast from molds, she's an artist she never repeats herself; she doesn't produce two things exactly alike; her trees never bear the same number of leaves; her plants never grow two pieces of fruit that exactly match. Being a very prolific and resourceful person, she puts a dab of individuality in everything she creates especially Man. Opportunities are equal, but the ability to grasp them, the mentality to appre- ciate them, the strength to develop them, vary with the individual. Ambition is a good thing, but attain- ment is not its synonym. The world is filled with 22-caliber cartridges trying to explode in 30-30 rifles. Plans for achievement must be matched with power to carry them through. De- 123 Herbert Kaufman All Men mosthenes was one stutterer who became are not a great orator, btrt most stutterers have Born Equal their mouths full when they try to follow conversation, much less lead it* One-armed men occasionally develop into oarsmen, but most of them can't even keep the boat in a straight line for the shore* It is a good rule not to attempt suc- cess in a field for which accident or nature has unfitted you. There will always be superior intellects, because superior progenitors sired them* Generations of careful breeding ought to eventuate in an improved strain* Futur- ity winners aren't found between the shafts of brick-carts* Any man is capable of getting out of himself what is in him, but he can't pro- gress further than his gifts will carry him* Accident will now and then combine circumstances so as to place an individual higher than he deserves, but, in the long run, Merit and Merit alone will deter- mine the outcome; the law of survival is the one immutable law; the strong must J24 All Men are not Born Equal rise to their appointed and destined places; All Men the weak must serve those who prove are not their fitness to command. Born Equal The greatest tragedies of an absolute democracy spring from the discontent spread by the sophistries of its demagogues; the unhappiest phase of a civilization founded upon equality is the misconstruc- tion of "equality*" It does not mean that any social order can overturn the order of nature; democracy only casts down the walls of unearned privilege; it kicks away the props of inherited prestige; it allows each man to stand for what he is and to have what he can reach to hold what his strength can master and to lose what his own gifts cannot maintain. But no democracy will ever be con- ceived by man which will overthrow the basic laws of the universe first among which is that of competition, which has prevailed since the cave-man began to test his prowess and to measure it against that of his neighbor. There are big duties and little tasks, 125 Herbert Kaufman All Men offices of direction and of obedience, and are not there must be big men and small men to Born Equal perform them* An army must have its chiel t its con- sulting aids t and its ranks; there must be cog-wheels as well as fly-wheels on every machine each watch must have its main- spring each government its supreme head; all that the doctrine of equal rights can hope to accomplish is that the man who is most deserving shall be placed where he should be. Universities cannot upset this principle; they can only multiply and spread in their scope until they develop more of those who are most fitted to stand upon the heights; they can broaden the opportunity, but they cannot put into any mind the elements of initiative or of judgment* Until the last page of the last volume is written in the Book of Years, Merit alone will rule the earth. \26 She doesn't resent your boorishness-she s grow- ing used to it lots of ideals get nicked when women go to work. 127 "MAGGIE" That's right dive on through the crowd and get in front or you won't find a seat* It's six o'clock and the shops are out. If you wait for the women to get aboard, you'll have to stand up all the way home. There's a vacant place! Shoulder past hhat girl you're stronger. You did it! Now lean back and have a comfortable half hour with the news. Why does she moon at you with such tired eyes? It's unfair to make you un- comfortable mask your face with the paper she can stand as well as you better. She's had more practice that's all she has done all day long. So a little while longer won't make much difference to her. If women will insist on going home just at the time men leave their offices, they mustn't be querulous if they find the cars crowded. The old ideas about courtesy and chiv- J29 Herbert Kaufman i 'Maggie" airy are getting to be moss-grown poppy- cock. They were well enough in the romantic age, but this is the business epoch. We haven't time to pause for such foolish notions nowadays. Besides, now that women are competing with men, they must forego some of the privileges of the sex and not hope to be coddled there's no sex in business* Dollars and cents and sentimentality can't be blended* And so you very properly dismiss the matter, having argued it out in all fairness and (especially) to your personal satisfaction. Meanwhile Maggie hangs onto the strap and wearily shifts her weight from one tired foot to the other. She doesn't resent your boorishness she's growing used to it lots of ideals get nicked when women go to work. She left home yesterday morning three hours earlier than your wife arose. It was dark in the room when her ninety-nine cent alarm clock tattooed her out of bed. She had to light the gas to find her clothes the water in the pitcher wore a skin of ice on top (they J30 "Maggie" don't build stationary wash basins with "Maggie* hot and cold water faucets in three-dol- lar-a-week "boudoirs") . All day long (and all days are long in the shops) she was standing, stretching, bending, smiling please don't forget the smile perhaps you noticed it the last time you came to her counter* You smiled, too. Hers, however, was a different sort it's one of the requirements Rule 27 "Be cheerful/' Yours was more of a social grin a knowing, engaging, subtle, invit- ing affair. Oh, "they can't tell you any- thing about these shop-girls,"- but it may be worth while to learn something about them. And when you do, chances are that you won't smile in quite the same way. They're women who must make good- good women, or they wouldn't be drudg- ing out their lives for a crust and a sup and a strip of bed. Just as frail as your women, with the same sort of souls and hearts and with the same yearning hunger for care and tenderness* Young women growing old at the rate of 24-months-a- 131 Herbert Kaufman 'Maggie" year women without chances or with lost chances. Some marry some were married most of them hope to be* Usually they're strong* But sometimes the half- starvation and the half-warmth and the longing for better shelter and all the food they'd like to eat and But most of them keep on. Keep on playing by the rules harder rules than yours in a tougher game and for smaller stakes* Women just as wholesome as your own often with as good blood in their veins. Women who haven't lost anything except protection* They're paying the fiddler because their fathers didn't pay their in- surance premiums* The gray mists veil the brightest of their days the menace of tomorrow is always between a tomorrow whose hope fades with their fading and whose approach may only be provided against by the hoarded piece of silver wrenched out of a ten-dollar bill from which must also come board and lodging and carfare and clothes and doctor's bills and vacations and Why aren't you smiling? 132 There comes an hour when grit surmounts all else. Then it isn't the number of pounds avoirdupois, or the size of a bleep, that counts, but the depth of the threads in a man's screws of courage. 133 THE MAN WITH THE YELLOW STREAK He's as dangerous as a streak of light- ning and as treacherous. He flashes his true self without warning and always hits something or somebody who doesn't ex- pect the blow. He's the Man with the Yellow Streak the man who can't win. He's wrong- wrong from eye-lash to toe-tip. There's a flaw in his grain he isn't made of the stuff to stand the strain. He's bound to give way under pressure. His meat is weak his blood is thin his soul is lack- ing* He's afflicted with an incurable moral epilepsy. He falls down in a panic every time he's called on to stand up and show his manhood. He can't reach a very high place and stay there. He's cursed with the dread of those who are afraid of great heights. 135 Herbert Kaufman The Man It ckrtches him when he is mid-way up the with the ladder and instead of going on and upward, Yellow he hugs to the rungs and hangs there Streak shivering with dread* He magnifies his risks he multiplies his dangers he loses all his balance his caution disappears, and instead, a foolhardy irresponsibility takes its place* He's a drowning man, sinking in a sea of self exaggerations* He will lay hold of anybody to save his own skin he will sacrifice friends, family, employer even his hope of the future in his wild frenzy to look out for his own immediate interests* He's a coward a mean, selfish craven* He's a girder with a flaw a beam with a knot* Don't use him where there is likely to be a strain he's a man with a danger spot. No matter how brilliant or trained or resourceful he may be when everything is right, all his superior qualifications are nil and must not be called on in an emer- gency. He's diseased he has a taint- he can never be counted on to utilize his gifts when they ought to count most. J36 The Man with the Yellow Streak He can't help himself because he isn't The Man man enough to own tip and ask for assist- with the ance. He won't tell you what's wrong Yellow with him. He wears the velvet of false Streak pride over his thread-bare patch and you only see when it's too late t when his cloak drops and shows his tattered courage* Search him out among your men and your associates* Don't wait until he runs amuck* He won't give you warning he loses his reason he doesn't realize what is happening. In his zeal to protect himself from the whip-lash of consequences, he'll lie he'll cheat he'll throw blame on the innocent. It's a kindness to both of you not to give him a chance to hurt him- self and you. You can't reform him. He's a quick- sand he'll merely keep involving you* The only thing under the sun that can possibly bring him to himself is to leave him to himself. A great enough shock may awaken the man in him no other medicine will count* Dress-parade isn't the test of a soldier. 137 Herbert Kaufman The Man The best tactician isn't the best field- with the officer* Don't mistake his ability under Yellow normal circumstances for capability in Streak emergencies* Resourcefulness under the pressure of circumstances has sent many a recruit climbing over the heads of trained but unseasoned superiors. There comes an hour when grit sur- mounts all else. Then it isn't the number of pounds avoirdupois t or the size of a bicep t or the number of convolutions in a brain that counts, but the depth of the threads in a man's screws of courage. Then Opportunity enters full-winged upon the scene and the right man is bound to come to the front. He'll always take his proper post and the man with the Yellow Streak is sure to drop to his true level whenever things get red hot and the fur begins to fly. 138 Your name in Burke's Peerage may give us an idea of the sort of ancestors you had, but Dun's Peerage is more likely to show what kind of an ancestor you're apt to prove. 139 YOUR START DOESN'T COUNT Time was when a coat of arms meant a lot now it's the arms in the coat that count* Your name in Burke's Peerage may give us an idea of the sort of an- cestors you had t but Dun's Peerage is more likely to show what kind of an ancestor you're apt to prove. This is the land where dreams come true where rainbows end in pots of gold where castles in the air come sailing down to earth and harden into gran- ite. Everything is possible among a people who cradle Presidents in mud-chinked cab- ins. If you fail, you lack grit or courage or judgment. Rotten fruit never ripens the wind doesn't shake the sound apples from the tree a little adversity makes the real man clutch tighter to his ambition. That which is easily had is worth least- it lies within anyone's grasp. The hard- Hi Herbert Kaufman Your Start ships of the road-maker are rewarded by Doesn't primeval forests and unstaked mines. Great Count rewards lie at the ends of journeys not at their start. Persistence is everything a patient brook carved the Grand Canyon of the Colorado. Niagara started in business as a dinky little river, but she kept on, and swept on, until she came to a place where she saw her chance to do something big and she did it* 142 "I wanted some- thingI knew what I wanted I wanted it hard enough and I got it." 143 THIS IS YOUR HOUR A man who did great things in a mighty way, once tore success from the claws of seemingly insuperable obstacles* "I had to win/' he said t "because nobody wanted to keep me from it half as badly as I wanted it." Across thousands of miles of seas, another conqueror of circumstance, who successfully dared the wrath of his Sultan allied with the three most puissant monarchs of Europe, stood upon the sea-cliffs and watched Gib- raltar poke her nose out of the Mediter- ranean mists. An Englishman at his side pointed across the angry swirl. "Yonder lies the seat of a power/' said he, "which could crush ten thousand tribes such as yours. How did you have the courage to defy it?" 145 Herbert Kaufman This is Your "Bismallah," answered Raisuli with a Hour smile, spreading his palms to the heavens, "I wanted something I knew what I wanted I wanted it hard enough and I got it/' 146 It's hard for a man to grow zealous over cul- ture or religion when his stomach is empty and his mind is filled with visions of corned- beef-and-cabbage. 147 THERE'S A HOME MARKET FOR CHARITY Don't start off t half-cocked with your sympathies. Make sure that they'll help before you heap them. The average human- itarian is so enthusiastic over the woes of all the world as a whole that he quite overlooks those of the individual. He is so ambitious that he hasn't time to be specific. He's like the picknicker with one pat of but- ter and a loaf of bread he tries to make it go so far that it isn't at all noticeable* Providence has had her hands full ever since she took charge of this universe and even Providence, with all of her facili- ties, has not been able to catch up with her back orders. There are too many senti- mentalists dropping theoretical tears over the woes of everybody from Good Hope to Cape Horn moved by the theatrical aspects of existence to futile theatrical 149 Herbert Kaufman There's a emotions* They go through the years dis- Home pensing conversation coin, but seldom coin Market for o f the realm* They exude benevolence from Charity every pore but the purse-pore. Their ears are always sympathetically opened their pocket-books stay closed. There is more than enough charitable impulse running around loose that's the trouble with it it needs to be harnessed and made to drag some of the woes of the world from the shoulders of its Atlases. Because you are occasionally maudlin, don't mistake that for pity the only time that you're doing good is when you have done something that actually helped. When next you sit in a theater and sniffle to the accompaniment of "Eliza-Cross- ing-the-Ice" music, tumble back to earth and consider that no playwright with his finite brain can conceive of poverty and sufferings half so intense as those which Life is constantly staging in the alleys and tenements of every city in the land. Pay a little less attention to feeding the starving intellect and feed a few more J50 There's a Home Market for Charity starving bodies. It's hard for a man to There's a grow zealous over culture or religion when Home his stomach is empty and his mind is filled Market for with visions of corned-beef-and-cabbage. Charity Don't bother so much about the lines of Tennyson and Browning until you've paid a little attention to the bread line. Let the cannibals in the South Sea Islands and the Chinese along the Hoang- Ho look out for themselves until you have eased some of the misery in your own block. It isn't necessary to export any of your charitable energy there's always a home- market for it. When the island of Formosa was swept by a tidal wave, the shock so disturbed Mrs. Hanks that her husband was moved to inquire if any distant branches of her family had settled there. "It's just upset me so," she remarked, "that I can't eat a thing. I never heard of anything so terrible." "Can't say that I have lost any appetite over it," answered Hiram. "Of course, Herbert Kaufman There's a I ain't mean enough to feel chipper be- Home cause it happened, but to tell you the truth, Market for Millie, it ain't worrying me any more than Charity reading about Pompeii and other such islands. I guess I would feel blue if I had ever paid a visit in the neighborhood and was acquainted with the folks out there, but not having seen the place and not knowing anybody who got hurt, if I looked very much disturbed Yd be a plain 'danged' hypocrite! "But your speaking of tidal waves re- minds me that the Widow Wilkins is down with pneumony, which means that there won't be anybody to take care of them two little girls of hers until she gets well, so I was figuring out what we could spare from the potato bin and the meat-house* Seems to me that if we look out for them that is right around us, it's about as much as the Good Lord can expect. If all the rest of the world would do the same there wouldn't be any need for folks in Podunk to lose sleep when things go wrong in Formosa*" 152 You can't arrive unless you survive. Half jour- neys are wasted. Only the stride which lands you at the finish counts. J53 EASY ROADS DO NOT LEAD TO EASE If you try to make life too easy, you'll soon find it too hard* Ambition is a dream without an awakening, unless it makes your will as eager as your wish* Effort is ex- ercise; endeavor produces endurance* It's no trouble to cut through butter- but it won't develop strength* The hewer of stone wears the strong arm and bears the long labor. Persistence is the key to existence. Success invariably rewards the good fight. Knowing what to do or how to do it won't bring results. Action must drive ability* The nail is useless without the hammer. Courage is the complement of knowledge. Easy roads do not lead to ease. Worn paths run to spots and things which others have already found. Opportunity is trampled underfoot in the crowded thoroughfares. The greater chances always lie ahead. 155 Herbert Kaufman Easy But the price matches the prize. If you Roads do want more than the average you must pay not Lead more to secure it. You can't buy with to llase counterfeit attempts* The true coin of accomplishment bears the mint marks of grit and honest labor. You can't have our best unless we have your best in return. You can't arrive un- less you survive. Half journeys are wasted. Only the stride which lands you at the finish counts. You can't take pleasure and indulgence with you in the climb. You must forego temptation and cut out the shortest cuts. The wrong road is never a long road therein lies its danger. If you meet with brambles and boulders t reflect that they are fewer toward the end. The more rugged you find the way t the less likelihood that you've been preceded. You need no capital but a fixed idea and the resolve to carry it out. Want a thing harder than the world wants to keep you from it, and you'll wear through every opposition and get it. Mere knowledge isn't competition. The 156 Easy Roads do not Lead to Ease man who secretes mast give way before Easy the man who creates. A bulging forehead Roads do can't conquer a squared jaw. not Lead When old Henry Harper died, he willed to Easc his millions to charity and his will to his sons. This is the letter which they found in his strongbox: "I gained my money from men weaker than myself, and I return it to them. If you are strong enough and bright enough to retain my estate, you have the necessary tools with which to build one of your own. "If you cannot succeed without my wealth, you couldn't have succeeded in holding to it. "Others will think that I have pauper- ized you, but I understand how great a legacy I have willed you: the incentive to prove yourself the supreme right to test your powers without the handicap of assured maintenance. "Go out into the world to earn and there- by learn. Rub against men and get an edge. Enjoy the most supreme of all rec- reations the thrill of creation. Only the builder truly rises above his fellow." J57 His pseudo- surf ace is like the iridescence on a stagnant pool it forces us to ponder upon the depth of unwholesome- ness beneath his pose. 159 THE CAD He's a hermit crab, lurking about on the shores of the social sea crawling around in the shell of a gentleman a thing of mere garb and gab. That misguided judg- ment which likens him to a pup is arrant flattery, but takes mean advantage of a real dog. He's a cad, a bounder, a near-man* His pseudo-surface is like the iridescence on a stagnant pool it forces us to ponder upon the depths of unwholesomeness be- neath his pose. Brother to the jackal, he sullies clean things preys upon weakness maims that which is beautiful and pure. He takes no chances; he merely takes away chances. He piles up costs which helplessness must settle, but he makes sure that there shall be no penalty for himself* 161 Herbert Kaufman The Cad He recognizes no responsibility to society; he is a wanton, a vandal, who wrecks with- out recking. His quarry is always de- fenseless. He lies to innocence; he trails after the unguarded, and makes of want and privation and hunger, pack-brothers in the hunt* He is the type of biped which fervently clasps the hand of a trusting friend and the hand of a friend's wife with a still more fervid grasp. He is a cast lower than the man who "kisses and tells" repulsed, he tells when he has not kissed. He breaks the bread of a household and then its hearts. He gambles with sacred things, and like all welchers he pays no obligations except those which the law itself has power to collect* He is not brave enough to be an actual thief he lacks the courage to steal little things such as property. He is a hundred orders below a Turpin or a Shepherd or a Dalton. A bank-robber would despise him. The pickpocket is his superior. He is an 162 The Cad "Artful Dodger/' roaming about amidst The Cad confiding reputations. He robs women of their good names instead of their goods. The chattels of society do not attract him, because there is a definite risk in their pilfering he defaults instead with the really precious treasures faiths and dreams and ideals* Technically, he is not a felon, because the finer ethics have no jurisprudence. Honor has disdained to call upon a Blackstone the God-spark which lifts the human out of the chaos of beastdom is supposed to put that into every normal man which calls for no tableted penalties for outraging the sacred fanes. Society fears to acknowledge the necessity for the unwritten law, but organized justice has as yet unsheathed no weapon to reach, him who shatters the un- recorded code. The knout of conscience is long and its leash is leaded, but conscience cannot reach beyond its range it can only strike where there is a target it can only hurt where there is a soul, and this Judas of the heart, 163 Herbert Kaufman The Cad this traitor to the finer instincts, this apostate to decency, is a mere wearer of flesh, alive only in his appetites and his indulgences. We have learned to build prisons for theft scaffolds for treason pesthouses for plague, but civilization may not wear the Crown until another problem of segre- gation is solved until the day comes when there is no longer a chair at the table a seat in the club and a shrug of indul- gence for the unnamable cad. 164 It takes more than a snicker or a jibe to kill the impulse of creation, which is given to strong men only because Prov- idence doesn't waste her real bounties. J65 THE MARKET VALUE OF OPTIMISM He remembers yesterday's sunshine while you frown at today's storms* He knows that the calm will surely follow the turmoil. The stabbing stone in the darkness is a happily discovered spot which he may thereafter avoid* While others blame Na- ture for putting thorns on roses, he is glad that she thought to put roses on the thorns. He is grateful for the palm tree and the well in the desert realizing how utterly desolate the sands would be without their oases. Amid the wreckage of disaster, he sees timbers to be picked out for the re- building* When the wind sweeps down the grain fields, he plans how he can use the straw. He always manages to find a bright spot in the gloom a star trying to shine through the clouds. When he is knocked off his 167 Herbert Kaufman The Market ^ ee *t he immediately finds them again Value of squares his shoulders, tightens up his pluck, Optimism and starts in to straighten up. Instead of discounting the promise of the future, he discounts his misfortune* He believes in himself, and with that belief, fertilizes his effort until it blossoms with result. From the beginning of time, the envious, complacent, lazy, half-hearted peoples of the world have resented his fine enthusiasm. Because he is different, they believe that he must be a fool. He is insane; he isn't balanced. He is abnormal; but it's the abnormality of a better brain and a more fluent imagination. He's a soldier of the foreguard, marching ahead to open the way and make safer the journeys of those who come after him who move onward only with the power of their feet and their meat. He aims higher than he strikes, and thereby hits a fairer mark than if he aspired lower. He sketches with the pencil of imagination, and even if he seldom builds his towers as high as his plans, he leaves the specifications with which another generation can complete the undertaking. 168 The Market Value of Optimism He's the optimist the man who believes The Market that he can do it. He fails time and time Value of again; but he fails in his work, not in him- Optimism self. Even if he went but halfway down the path of progress, he left only half as much still to be done by the man who followed. All that you have, all that you cherish, all that is big and fine and worth while, all your ethics, all your philosophies, all your sanities, all that means most to you, all that has brought you down from the tree homes of your ape forebears was believed in by one set of optimists and achieved by another. The General who thinks that he can win his battle does more with his optimism than with his cannons. Without that be- lief, a hundred battalions and a thousand squadron of horse are halved in number. A coward can't conquer anything, be- cause he can't conquer himself. A doubter can't help, because he's an enemy to himself a traitor to his own cause. Nothing that is hard, nothing that bends 169 Herbert Kaufman The Market men's backs and strains their sinews and Value of tears their souls and starves them, would Optimism ever be brought to pass if an optimist didn't have that within him which made him feel it was worth while to endure and to suffer for the sake of getting to the place and the thing he wanted* Ability doesn't count? knowledge is use- less; experience has no worth without the driving force of optimism. It's the steam that makes all the wheels go round it's the sparking plug of the motor it starts things. Some one must think for those who won't and can't think for themselves. An optimist had to see the steam of a loco- motive through the mist of a teakettle before the Baldwins could build their shops. He didn't anticipate the space condenser that whirls you from New York to Chicago over night; but he found the principle he believed that it could be done. The architect is a bigger man than the builder. You can put dumb wheels of iron side by side and cog to cog and make 170 The Market Value of Optimism them do most anything after some op- The Market timist has pointed out the thing to do. Value of An optimist found America; an optimist Optimism built the airship; an optimist rolled in the gutters of poverty, but even in the gauntest hours he clung to his belief until he set together the fingers of steel and brass that set these lines into print. He was jeered at and sneered at; nine men out' of ten thought him crazy, and ninety-nine in a hundred called him a bore; but he knew better all the time, and so it didn't hurt. It takes more than a snicker or a jibe to kill the impulse of creation, which is given to strong men only because Providence doesn't waste her real bounties upon yellow- veined weaklings. Every time the stock ticker starts to spell financial doom and the fear maddened hordes of depositors rush to the banks to hasten the disaster, half a dozen optimists a few men who believe thai courage and grit and the natural resources of America will always readjust the balance save the nation from bankruptcy. They back up 171 Herbert Kaufman The Market their belief with their fortunes; but they Value of risk nothing the risk would be in not Optimism believing they save themselves by saving the markets* The most valuable stock that is listed on 'Change is optimism, and it's worth more per share than Chemical National. Anything is possible to the man who believes that nothing is impossible* He doesn't always make good; but he makes good oftener than the pessimist. His judg- ment isn't always right; but many a time the very vehemence of his confidence has carried through an undertaking which half- heartedness would have wrecked. He can never see failure, because the golden sun of ambition is always shining in his face, blinding his eyes to the impos- sibilities. He doesn't heed the warnings of discouragement, because higher and clearer than the little noises of the little people he hears the call of success. He must be what he is* He's filled with the mightiest mes- sage given to man he has been touched with the God-spark that blazes into achievement* 172 He has wrenched the knocker from his door; stuffed his ears with cotton wool and can- not hear Opportunity when she does sum- mon him. J73 THE MAN WHO THINKS HE HAS NO CHANCE The man who thinks he has no chance destroys his chances by acknowledgment of self-defeat. He has deliberately blinded himself; bound upon his limbs the shackles and chains of cowardice; weighted himself down with the greatest of all handicaps- despair. He has wrenched the knocker from his door; stuffed his ears with cotton wool and cannot hear Opportunity when she does summon him. Life is a huge kaleidoscope, rotating upon the axis of time. Every day the earth takes a turn that readjusts the aspect of existence. Every hour reveals a new pat- tern for the future. Viewpoints are inces- santly altering. New combinations of cir- cumstance are putting novel phases upon affairs. 175 Herbert Kaufman Xhe The highways and byways are shifting* Man Who The wastes of past centuries are awake and Thinks He blossoming into fertile areas. nas JNo ^ hopeful, fearless, ingenious mind can- not fail to behold promise everywhere. All over the world Industry is in a vast, seething ferment. From Shanghai to Lima the merchant is finding new openings for his wares. From London to Kobe the manufacturer is planning further markets for his products. From Assouan to Death Valley the engineer is battling with the arid, burning clays and sands. The explorer is roaming from pole to pole for new fibres and new seeds and new timbers and new earths and new ores, upon which new industries will feed. In a thousand laboratories the chemist is fitting his keys of research to the locked secrets of Nature, enriching art and science and commerce with wealths undreamed of by the dead ages. The river is wearing a leash, and, tied to the turbine, its waters are making light and giving power to busy wheels for miles around. 176 The Man Who Thinks He Has No Chance A new empire for man's possession has been conquered by the aeronaut* The ever-hungry reaper and harvester are gnawing grain and grass where once were Bad Lands crying to the railroads to follow them monster needles with iron rails for thread, stitching fruitful textures to cover the bared body of the Earth, You nor your children's children can, within the total span of your lives, take advantage of all the chances which a single decade has disclosed. Never in all the millions of years of its history has this secretive old universe dis- played such riches, so many generous opportunities, as now* The only man who can't better himself in such a whirl and swirl of pioneering is the hopeless incompetent, the laggard, the sorehead, the idler, or the half-wit. Courage and effort and imagination and energy never knew such chances since Cheops went pyramid-building. Wake yourself, shake yourself, and DO. North and South and East and West, the 177 The Man Who Thinks He Has No Chance Herbert Kaufman The call is sounding* For every atrophied acre Man Who of farmland in New England, there is a Thinks He homestead section in a Montana Valley or ^Jf 8 ^ a Canadian prairie. A thousand cities are about to be born. Help to make them* They will need builders t merchants, lawyers, doctors, manufacturers. Get a map and a time-table. The most terrific century of all is here* Share it. 178 His coat -of -arms is a sneering frown, sur- mounted with funeral plumes and emblazoned upon a field of tears. The immemorial motto of his clan is, "I told you so." 179 THE PESSIMIST AND ALSO CLARENCE He turns the silver side of every cloud to find its dark lining. Beholding one maimed petal, he bewails the fading of all the rose. His to-morrow brings no hope no rainbows follow his storms. He is a human bullfrog, constantly diving into the dark mud of existence and soiling the song of life with his chilling croak. He seeks selfish motives in every benefactor he bites the coin of charity and blackens the pure metal of generosity with his miserable acid of doubt. He peers into the hearts of children for guile and deceit he tests the golden im- pulses of great-souled men for streaks of brass his chief happiness is the pursuit of misery, and when his hunting is successful he divides his woes freely with all his acquaintances. 181 Herbert Kaufman The Pessimist and also Clarence While all the rest of the world is tugging onward, he is straining backward a clog- ging cog amidst the whirling wheels* He's a fussy, grouchy, disturbing member of society, himself unwilling to advance yet unwilling to have others press onward* His coat-of-arms is a sneering frown, surmounted with funeral plumes and em- blazoned upon a field of tears. The im- memorial motto of his clan is, "I told you so*" His eyes never lift to the heights of achievement* To him all that is untried is untrue that which is undone, cannot be done what has not been proven must be false. We all know him* He's at every desk and every elbow so busy criticising that he keeps others from creating so earnestly watching pennies that might roll out that he overlooks the dollars they might bring in. He swells his chest and points with pride at the expenses he keeps down without a thought to the revenues he keeps away* Don't mind him, he doesn't count. He's 182 The Pessimist and also Clarence just a stumbling block on the tip-road. What he calls caution is merely cowardice. If half the energy he applies to retarding his associates were bent upwards, its force would hurl a dozen undertakings to their goal. Clarence Nearsite was such. Clarence is no longer Chief Pennysaver for Gettup & Goze. Clarence's resignation was quite a surprise to a number of people, including Clarence. When he and old man Gettup talked it all over, this was about the gist of the valedictory: "When I engaged you to be our safety-valve, I didn't realize what an intense disposition you have* You have not only been a satisfactory safety-valve, but too satisfactory in about one more year, the valve would have been the only active part of our machine. "So long as you held down expenses, you were all right, but when you got enthusiastic and started to hold down our income, too, I sorter felt that I'd prefer to smash the business by letting it go too hard than see it lost by running down. Your record in the 183 The Pessimist and also Clarence Herbert Kaufman The Pessimist and also Clarence postage stamp department is irreproach- able your showing in lead pencils and rubber bands is immaculate* The prices at which you purchased our ink and scratch- pads show a marvelous knowledge of values, but when I look over the list of ten dollar chances you let slip by, while you were avoiding ten cent risks, something tells me that we must part. "Somehow or other you strongly remind me of Bruno. Father bought him to keep the boys from stealing his apples. Bruno did manage to drive the boys away, but he also drove away the commission men who came to bid for the crop and so Father had to dispense with him he couldn't afford so much protection. "I expect that we'll lose many a dime through the coming year, running along without you, but the dollar-well is so deep and action is so important in emptying it that we'll take the risk on spilling a little bit for the sake of keeping the buckets full." 184 He's all right as far as he goes but he's short on practical mileage and Fate always kicks him off at a deserted water tank half way between Start and Finish. 185 THji CHRONIC FAILURE He journeys t tough life with his head butting into the clouds and his feet dragging through the quagmire. He's a trance medium, a schemer, a visionary, a chaser of the "will-o'-the-wisp." He rushes on without seeing the road, and, like a charging bull, he doesn't know that there's a stone wall ahead of him until he batters himself full of bumps* He's searching for "X"- the great unknown quantity, the twentieth dimension, the secret of the ancients, the magic formula of the alchemist which will change the lead of incompetency into the gold of results. He deludes himself with the fool idea that he can get wealth without getting down to hard tacks. He builds weird ladders to the fairy-land J87 Herbert Kaufman Xhe of his fancy t but the trouble with his Chronic ladders is that they have no rungs. He Failure tries to climb up on the steps of theory and his progress is just as rapid as that of a sprinter who attempts to lower the hundred- yard record on a tread-mill. He's imbued with ideals instead of ideas. His whole career is an endless series of rehearsals which never eventuate into per- formances. He's all right as far as he goes but he's short on practical mileage; and Fate always kicks him off at a deserted water-tank half way between Start and Finish. His brain is so jammed with illusions that there isn't room for conclusions* He never learns that a man must buy a full ticket to go the full journey that he must rear a stairway to the upper stories. His bridges end in midstream they never reach the other side. He sets off down the thoroughfare, and before he has fairly started, the first crossroad catches his attention and off he goes, without a moment's consideration as to where he'll land. J88 The Chronic Failure He isn't lazy he's merely hazy. The The amount of time and zeal that he fritters Chronic away is tremendous it doesn't count be- Failure cause it isn't concentrated it escapes in all directions* He's a human teakettle blowing his steam from a dozen spouts he's filled with force, but he doesn't drive anything with it. He has the power to make things spin t but he doesn't harness it sanely his driving belt is so loose that when he does hitch it on to a wheel, it immediately slips off. He's the busiest builder in town, but he shows no results. His foundations are too shallow to hold his walls. And when he does dig them deep enough, his walls are never evened up when he starts in to roof. He's a carpenter without a spirit level and a plumb line a constructor without a work- ing diagram. He's first cousin to a water bucket with a hole in the bottom no matter how much energy he pumps into himself, it's wasted* He's the Chronic Failure the man with .every sense but common sense. He J89 Herbert Kaufman figures only the chances for success, but doesn't contemplate the percentage against him. He doesn't look for the things which are likely to go wrong. He's a bad general he's content to consider how he can win, but not where he can lose. He intends to be straight, but he isn't honest to himself, and his self-dishonesty involves everyone whose confidence he gains, and so he seems dishonest to them. All around him are average men, with fewer natural gifts. They attain and they retain because they take the time to think before they start and to finish what they begin. They don't bother with "X" they know its equivalent they attempt but one task at a time and carry it out. J90 You can't get the best of him because he holds on to the best in him- self. You can't keep him down because you can't keep him down- hearted 191 HE KEEPS ON WHILE YOU He has his reverses he trips and bruises his heart grief bites into his soul delay nags at his ambition the frosts of ill-fortune nip his hopes time and time again he walks forth in faith, only to sink in the morass of deceit but he smiles* Life has been as hard with him as with you he has learned that every joy must be paid for with two tears he has found that today's dreams are seldom tomorrow's wakenings but he keeps on while you weep on he trudges forward, always seek- ing something better eternally in quest of a fair sky and a rose by the wayside* He isn't a philosopher nor an enthusiast. He's merely a real man, a sitter in the Game of Life who knows the rules and accepts them the same rules in the same J93 Herbert Kaufman He Keeps game that the world has played since the On While first dawn came smiling out of Chaos* rxT 6e ^ ^^ ^ >ecattse he is a man, life is a finer thing than if he were a sour-face. He sneers at nothing. He judges no fellow he has put himself upon the scales and has seen his own short measurements far too often. He is charitable because he has known so many hours when he could find no charity. He is just because he has met with injustice. He is daring because he has learned that the average man is a coward therefore he can rely upon no initiative but his own. He never despairs tomorrows are un- known quantities. When in doubt, he plays confidence. He chooses a lever instead of a drag. He is never totally a failure. When he loses much, he still keeps something the right to respect himself. He can't lose utterly because he can only lose what can be replaced. 194 He Keeps On While You Weep On You can't get the best of him because he He Keeps holds on to the best in himself. You can't On While keep him down because you can't keep him You Weep downhearted* You can't defeat him be- ^ cause he is guarding his birthright of man- hood and protecting that instead of the things you want t so that even if you do win he does not lose. Back in the 40's when the boys set out for the Coast, Grandpa Wilson insisted upon making the journey. When the mountains tried to frown him back when the labor of trudging up the pathless rocks clutched at his heart with tearing fingers when his wind wheezed through tortured lungs and his legs crumbled, and it seemed that his last step was to be his last, he would search about him for a heavy log or a hefty rock, place it upon his shoulders and then try again. The burden made the way doubly difficult, but when he dropped his handicapping weight the relief was so great that the top of the mountain seemed to come half way down the slope to help him up. J95 Herbert Kaufman He Keeps None of us can tell how much more we On While can endure until we are called upon to You Weep endure more. We don't know how far we can go until we are faced with a longer journey. Imagination can be turned into a stilt or a pair of wings, just as often as into a ball and chain. When we believe that things can be better instead of worse, we make them so. Despair can only exist by recognition. J96 He does not make the common error of con- fusing education with intelligence. The world is filled with good brains which have missed the opportunity of training. 197 A FAIR MAN He gazes at life through a window-pane, and does not view it through a lens. There- fore, he sees all things clearly since he does not permit prejudice to distort his vision. He continually guards himself against the error of diminishing the value of any man's works because of a personal antipathy. And on the other hand, he is just as care- ful not to make the equally great mistake of exaggerating the virtues and attainments of those whom he loves or likes. He measures facts on honest scales, and weighs folks as he finds them, not as he hopes or hears or wishes them to be. He forms no definite opinion on any sub- ject until he is qualified by the possession of information sufficient to reach a sane, unbiased conclusion. He does not heed gossip or slander. The J99 Herbert Kaufman A Fair one is bred of thoughtlessness and the Man other is the bread of malice* He despises the anonymous attack* Honesty never wears the badge of the sneak. Truth does not hide in the grass* He waits to hear both sides of a quarrel and insists upon maintaining a neutral attitude until he knows enough to judge fairly. He admires many whose essentially per- sonal characteristics and inclinations do not appeal to him. Admiration is the approval of deeds* It is a calm, clear sum total of abilities, in the addition of which the symbols of friend- ship do not figure. Many men in whose company he finds no pleasure and whom he does not desire to meet upon an intimate social basis, none the less receive his enthusiastic approval of their achievements. He searches beneath dress and under ad- dress for ability and stability. He knows that tailors cannot change the cut of a 200 A Fair Man man's character, and that talent is not al- A Fair ways glib in its expression. He does not Man make the common error of confusing edu- cation with intelligence. The world is filled with good brains which have missed the opportunity of training. Intelligence is an instinct and an experience, while culture is largely a schooling a memorizing of facts and rules and incidents. Initiative cannot be taught; creative tendencies cannot be lectured into a head; the senses of honor, of self-respect, of dignity, of charity, of construction, of leadership, are birthrights. He is never a snob. He exercises his right to choose for associates those with whose ideas and ideals he is in sympathy; but he does not assume that the rest of the world is thereby wrong or inferior or foolish. 20 \ We've equalized opportunity. This is the most that society can do it cannot equalize men. 203 YOU MUST SUCCEED ALONE You say that you deserve success then prove it* We're sitting in the jury box waiting for the evidence ready to be con- vinced willing to grant you what you deserve, but neither anxious to help nor to hinder you. Present your facts show results, but don't rest your case with words. Your personal opinion is of absolutely no moment; it's bound to be biased. Try as you may, you will look at yourself through the glasses of self-interest you will exag- gerate your importance. We refuse to accept the measurement of your own scales; they can't be honest. Conceit and egotism are helping to weigh down your side. You're prone to mistake the desire for the ability to accomplish inclination is apt to color your judgment. 205 Herbert Kaufman You Must We're cynical? Why not? Since the be- Succeed ginning of civilization we have seen most Alone men over-reach themselves the memory of the world is scarred, and each scar represents an experience with shirkers who posed as workers with weaklings who at- tempted beyond their strength. Most of mankind must serve only a few can command. Unless we are impartial and remain judicial, we will have chaos* Men must adjust themselves to their proper relations to the rest of society* Progress is a matter of elimination. The only way that you can find your exact measurement is to jump into the seive it can't cheat. If you're big enough, you won't slip through the mesh, but if you're a "cull" you must be sifted out* Democracy has made of life an open game in a free field. There are no bound- aries or fences, except for those who deserve constraint and for those who have not the power to climb over the barriers which segregate servant from master, follower from leader* 206 You Must Succeed Alone The world wants its powerful sons and You Must the only way they can be found is to set Succeed them among their fellows and have them Alone demonstrate their supremacy by the con- trast. No other test would be a true or fair one. Leaders are not discovered; they prove themselves. Power is not bestowed it is not a giving but a gift. WeVe equalized opportunity. This is the most that society can do it cannot equalize men. If you are lacking in courage and grit and mentality if you are twisted or warped if the vital impulse of attainment is not bred in your bones and surging in your blood, all the legislation and help between here and Mars can't more than prop you up. And we refuse to prop you, simply be- cause the other man can't have what belongs to him if we handicap him by giving you assistance and demand that he look out for himself. We don't care what your parents were we only wish to know who and what you 207 Herbert Kaufman You Must arc what you can do and how honestly Succeed you will do it. Alone You can have anything if you are shrewd and tenacious and lasting enough to reach it, but you must attain, alone* You must fight for your place t but you must fight fairly and under the rules* If you break them, we'll break you* 208 Whenever you try to hold him back you simply turn him into a bow you bend him into greater power, and lend him the strength to hurl his shaft of determination twice as far. 209 THE MAN YOU CANT DEFEAT He isn't afraid of failure, and so after awhile Failure becomes afraid of him. When all's said and done, Failure is like every other bully and turns tail at the first hint of a whole-hearted, fearless defense* What if he does stumble granted that he goes down in defeat time and time again just watch him fumbling, crawling, hus- banding his strength bit by bit, gripping fast with his last shred of grit and his last flash of wit never despairing watching and waiting until he sees the chance and then, Zip! before you realize it, he is on his feet again and up against the wall ready to take on any comer. He keeps learning what not to do until he has narrowed down the field of mistakes and errors, and by the sheer experience of 2\\ Herbert Kaufman The Man elimination he knows at last the few sane, You Can't safe principles of success* Defeat y^e s j zc o f a ^ as ^ never appalls him his courage is great enough to lift him shoulder to shoulder with any emprise to which he aspires; his resolution is the most terrific ram that ever battered the walls of cir- cumstance* Errors of judgment and his over-zeal repeatedly hurl him to earth. But while he lies on his back he doesn't waste time wailing because of his failing; he doesn't re-hash the past and moan and groan over what is gone and what can't be helped; he takes count of his assets and figures out how he can return to the game* He doesn't mind the broken bones they'll knit; or the bruises they'll heal; or the sprains time will take care of all of them* So long as his spirit isn't fractured and his determination isn't splintered, he's not shattered, but only battered. The mere loss of goods is just a loss of time; if he hasn't lost his manhood and his memory, he can duplicate whatever he 2J2 The Man You Can't Defeat possessed and re-attain whatever he Xhe Man dropped. You Can't You can "break" him. but you can't break his backbone. You can bind his activities, but you can't tie down his spirit. You can handicap him, but so long as he doesn't handicap himself, he'll win out against you as surely as day must follow night. He puts his own judgment in the scales and the prejudices of the whole universe won't outweigh it; while there's breath in his body, and hope in his breast, and nerve in his meat, he's ready and eager to pit his ambitions against all humanity. Don't waste the time to laugh at him, to shrug at him or strike at him; the joke is bound to be on you in the end. He's padded all over with self-assurance. A sneer can't get through his vitals. Dis- belief and incredulity rattle against his sheath of confidence like dry peas upon a stone wall. Whenever you try to hold him back you simply turn him into a bow you bend him 213 Herbert Kaufman The Man into greater power, and when you let go You Can't you have loaned him the strength to hurl Defeat his shaft of determination twice as far. He's a human spring the greater the pressure you put upon him t the further he'll rebound. Opposition is his whetstone; it simply puts a deeper edge upon his keenness. Every unfair dig that he receives is a spur-tear. It doesn't stop him, but sends him leaping ahead. It rouses his lazing, lurking am- peres and kilowatts of force it calls upon his reserve of energy and sets it surging and singing through his being, doubling his horse power, intensifying his voltage, until he breaks every band and bond of oppo- sition. Don't measure him by his years; courage never rusts with time. He'll break new ground for himself up to the hour that you break ground for him. You can't tell how he'll finish, until his finish. 214 But the wise old Earth wags her aged head at you and pityingly smiles. Mother of Creation, she knows what mighty thing has been deeded to her sons to be. 215 WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH THE POLE Another search of ages has been ended; another secret of the universe disclosed. A new leaf has been added to the laurel of achievement* This wonder-century which showed the way to talk across the vasts and whispered to Invention how to seize the highways of the air. has led the first explorer to the Pole. And, of coarse, e we all agree that it " ftHnfa Why, it isn't the drum at all it's the Qaus steam radiator sounding "Taps!" calling you to come back back over the Road of Years back to NOW. But you're lonely and wistful and you want to stay and hear the sleigh bells ring you want one more real Christmas. The things you can buy in the shop are all wrong. You can't get any fun out of them. Christmas gifts don't count if they aren't brought down the CHIMNEY. 329 A 000 121 064 o