1
 
 E D W A--& D, 
 
 VARIOUS VIEWS 
 
 HUMAN NATURE, 
 
 TAKEN 
 
 From LIFE and MANNERS, 
 Chiefly in ENGLAND. 
 
 Dicimus autem 
 
 Hos quoque Felices, qui ferre incommoda vitz, 
 
 Nee jaftare jugum, vita didicere magiftra. j uy. 
 
 By the AUTHOR of ZELUCO. 
 
 IN TWO VOLUMES. 
 VOL. I. 
 
 LONDON: 
 
 Printed for A. STRAHAN, and T. CADELE jun. and W. DAVIES 
 
 (Succefibrs to Mr. CADELL) in the Strand, 
 
 MTCCSCTl,
 
 - 
 
 D W A R 
 
 VOL. I.
 
 E D W 'A R D. 
 
 CHAP. I. 
 
 The Sympathy of a benevolent MM. 
 
 MRS. BARNET, wife of Mr. George 
 Barnet, who lived at no great dif- 
 tance from London, had been in town to 
 put her daughter to a boarding fchool. 
 
 She had taken a poft-chaife, that the 
 chariot might remain for the ufe of her huf- 
 band, whofe conftant cuftom it was to drive 
 out every day before dinner, to acquire an 
 appetite, the only fenfible reafon- which, 
 in Mr. Barnet's opinion, any man in eafy 
 circumftances could have for being at the 
 trouble of exercife. 
 
 VOL. i. B As
 
 2 EDWARD. 
 
 As Mrs. Barnet returned from town, the 
 poft-chaife broke down in the middle of the 
 road a ftage-coach came up at the inftant 
 that Mrs. Barnet and her maid had got fafely 
 out of the poft-chaife ; the coachman knew 
 Mrs. Barnet, and his cou'rfe being directly 
 through a village contiguous to her huf- 
 band's houfe, he ftopp'd, and offered to fet 
 her down at her own door. Mrs. Barnet 
 perceiving that it would take a confiderable 
 time before the chaife could be mended, 
 agreed to the coachman's propofal, and de- 
 fired her maid to put a fmall bundle into 
 the coach. 
 
 "Lard, madam," cried the maid, as Toon 
 as me had peeped into the coach, " here is 
 a frightful old woman and a beggarly look- 
 ing boy you cannot poflibly go in here." 
 
 " As for the old woman and the boy,'* 
 faid the coachman, " although they are fitting 
 within, they are no more than outfide paf- 
 fengers for as ill luck would have it, I 
 chanced to have none within; fo when the 
 rain came on, I took pity on the boy, and 
 defired him to take fhelter in the coach, 
 
 which
 
 EDWARD. 3 
 
 which he refufed, unlefs the old woman 
 was allowed to go in alfo ; fo as the boy, 
 you fee, is a very pretty boy, I could not 
 bear that he fhould be expofed to the rain, 
 and fo I was obliged to let in both ; but 
 now, to be fure, if her ladyfhip infifts on it, 
 they muft both go on the outfide, which 
 will be no great hardfhip, for it begins to 
 grow fair." 
 
 " Fair or foul, they muft get out directly," 
 faid the maid ; " do you imagine that my 
 miftrefs will fit with fuch creatures as thefe, 
 more particularly in fuch a dirty machine r" 
 
 " Hark you, young woman," faid the 
 coachman, '' you may fay of the old woman 
 and the boy what you pleafe, they do not 
 belong to me ; but as for the coach, it is 
 my coach, and I would have you to know, 
 bears as good a reputation as any on the 
 road, perhaps a better than your own ; fo 
 I would not advife you for to go for to 
 flurify the character of thofe who are faying 
 nothing againft yours : But as for you, my 
 dear, you muft come out," continued he, 
 B 2 taking
 
 4 EDWARD. 
 
 taking the boy by the arm, " fmce this here 
 gentlewoman infifts upon it." 
 
 " By no means," faid Mrs. Barnet ; " let 
 the child remain, and the woman alfo; there 
 is room for us all." 
 
 So faying, fhe ftepped into the coach ; 
 the maid followed, and the coachman drove 
 on. 
 
 This arrangement was highly difagree- 
 able to the maid, who feemed greatly mor- 
 tified at being feated near a woman fo mean- 
 ly drefled^ 
 
 Mrs. Barnet, on the other hand, was pleaf- 
 ed with the opportunity of accommodating 
 the poor woman and boy for this lady was 
 of a benevolent difpofition, and although 
 fhe was likewife mod uncommonly free 
 from vanity, yet if all the maid's ftock had 
 T)een divided between them, the miflrefs and 
 maid together would have made a couple of 
 very vain women. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet was in rather low fpirits,. 
 
 owing to her being feparated now, for the 
 
 firft time in her life, from her daughter 
 
 I the
 
 EDWARD. 5 
 
 the old woman, on the contrary, being de- 
 lighted with her fituation in the coach, 
 was in high fpirits, and much difpofed to 
 fhare them with all the company. 
 
 She made repeated attempts to draw Mrs. 
 Barnet into con verfation, but without fuccefs ; 
 for although from a civility of difpofition 
 which never forfook her, fhe anfwered with 
 affability all the woman's queflions, flie al- 
 ways relapfed into penfive filence. 
 
 The old woman was furprifed as well 
 as difappointed at this fhe never in the 
 courfe of her life had met with fo filent a 
 woman, and thinking it next to impoffible 
 that fhe fhould ftumble upon two on the 
 fame day, in the fame coach, of the fame 
 difpofition, fhe ventured to addrefs the maid, 
 in .fpite of her repulfive looks, faying, 
 " Pray, miftrefs, as the fun begins to break 
 out, do you not think it will turn out a 
 good day ?" 
 
 In this attempt to lead the maid into 
 
 converfation, fhe was flill more unfuccefsful 
 
 than fhe had been with the miftrefs ; for 
 
 although the former did not partake of the 
 
 B 3 'latter's
 
 6 E D \V A R D. 
 
 latter' s dejection of fpirits, and had no 
 kind of averfion in general to talking, yet 
 {he deemed a perfon drafted as this poor 
 woman was, far beneath her anfvvering 
 therefore furveying the woman's ruflet 
 gown with contempt, and at the fame time 
 brufhing the duft from the fleeves of her 
 own, which was of filk, with an elevated 
 nofe and projected under lip, fhe turned 
 her difdainful eyes to the other fide, with- 
 out making the poor woman any anfwer. 
 
 Baffled in all her atteVnpts to provoke at 
 converfaticn, and quite unable to hold her 
 tongue, as a laft recourfe the old woman 
 began to talk with the boy. 
 
 His prattle foon difturbed the meditations 
 and attracted the attention of Mrs. Barnet, 
 who at length afked the old woman, what 
 relation the boy was to her. 
 
 Pleafed with this opportunity of giving 
 freedom to her tongue, fhe anfwered with 
 great rapidity, and almoft in one breath, 
 " relation to me ! All my relations are dead, 
 pleafe your Ladyfliip, except my nephew, 
 the pawn-broker in Shug-lane, who is grown 
 
 fo
 
 EDWARD. 7 
 
 ib rich and fo proud, that he hardly fpeaks 
 to me ; but as for that there boy I never 
 faw him in my life, till this here blefled day, 
 when I received him from the overfeers 
 of the work-houfe, to take him to my own 
 houfe in the country; where I already have 
 fix children all boarded at the rate of poor 
 three {hillings a week, which your Lady- 
 fhip mud acknowledge is too little in all 
 confcience for my trouble and expence; 
 but the hearts of thofe who take care of 
 the poor of feme parifhes, are as hard as the 
 very church walls. Now,pleafe yourLady- 
 fhip, this poor child, it feerns, was lately ill 
 of the affluenza, and cannot be 'put out to 
 a trade till he grows ftronger. And fo they 
 gave him to me with the other children, 
 for the benefice of country air ; which I 
 do allure your Ladyfhip does quite and 
 clean the contrirary of doctors drugs, 
 for it recovers the health of the children, 
 and gives them all a monftrous devouring 
 appetite, as I am fure I finds to my coft 
 
 and fo if fo be as " 
 
 B 4 " Pray
 
 8 EDWARD. 
 
 " Pray, who are his parents?" faid Mrs. 
 Barnet, interrupting the old woman's flu- 
 ency, which fhe faw was inexhauftible. 
 
 " The Lord above, he only knows," re- 
 plied the old woman; " for they told me 
 he was brought to the work-houfe when 
 he was only a few months old; the parifti 
 officers received him from a poor woman, 
 who faid fhe was not his mother, but his 
 name was Edward Evelin ; but who was 
 his mother, is difficult to tell; and ftill more, 
 who was his real father, as your Ladyfhip 
 well knows, for they have never been 
 found out ; but it (lands to reafon, that he 
 muft have had both, for I never heard of 
 any body who had neither father nor mo- 
 ther, except Michael Hifendeck, of whom 
 the parfon of our parifh preached laft Sun- 
 day; but Michael lived in the bible days, 
 which is different from thefe here times ; 
 fo this boy's parents muft be perfons un- 
 known ; but be who they will, I fufpecl: 
 that they were no better than they (hould 
 be; in which cafe it is pretty clear that 
 
 this
 
 EDWARD. 9 
 
 this here boy, faving your Ladyfhip's pre- 
 fence, is neither more nor lefs than an. 
 unnatural child ; for if he had been born 
 in the natural way of marriage, it ftands 
 to reafon that his parents would have 
 owned him long ago." 
 
 Mrs. Barnet, affected with the condition 
 of this boy, who began life under fuch un- 
 favourable aufpices, faid, " Are you not 
 forry, my dear, to leave home ?" 
 
 " No," anfwered he; " I don't care." 
 
 " Is there not fomebody at home whom 
 you are forry to leave?" refumed me. 
 
 " No," replied the boy; " I am not forry 
 to leave any body." 
 
 " What, not thofe who are good to you ?" 
 rejoined me. 
 
 " Nobody was ever good to me" faid the 
 boy. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet was touched with the child's 
 anfwers, which ftrongly painted his helplefs 
 lot, and the cruel indifference of the world. 
 She thought of her own child now, for the 
 firft time, left to the care of ftrangers, and 
 the tear flood in her eye. 
 
 "My
 
 io EDWARD. 
 
 " My poor little fellow," faid me, after 
 a fhort paufe, l< was nobody ever good to 
 you?" 
 
 " No," anfwered he, " they are good 
 only to the Miftrefs's fon." 
 
 ' tc And have you no friend, my dear?" added 
 Ihe with a figh. 
 
 " No, for old Robin the foot-man died 
 laflweek."' 
 
 " Was he your friend ? 
 
 " Yes, that he was, replied the boy ; he 
 once gave me a piece of ginger-bread." 
 -. Mrs. Barnet could not help fmiling at the 
 expreflive fimplicity of the anfwer, and 
 felt herfelf fo much interefled in him, and 
 fo much affeded at feeing fo fine a child 
 thrown as it were at random on the world, 
 that while me yet fmiled, the tears flowed 
 from her eyes which the boy obfervirig, 
 and miftaking their caufe, faid, " I fell a 
 crying myielf, when -I heard that poor old 
 Robin was dead." 
 
 " That was like a good boy," faid Mrs. 
 Barnet. 
 
 " No,
 
 EDWARD. IT 
 
 " No, it was like a naughty boy," faid he ; 
 " and the matron whipt me for it." 
 
 " My poor dear little fellow," exclaimed 
 Mrs. Barnet, " that was hard indeed !" 
 
 " It is very right howfomever, Madam, 
 faid the old woman, that children fhould be 
 whipt for crying ; if I did not make that at 
 conftant rule at my houfe, there would be 
 nothing but fquawling from morning to 
 night for I'll tell you, as how I always 
 ferves them there little chits, whenever they 
 begins to make 'a noife I takes them " 
 
 Here the old woman was interrupted by 
 the flopping of the coach at the part of the 
 common where fhe was to get out and walk 
 to her own houfe. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet warmly recommended the 
 boy to her care, putting at the fame time a 
 guinea into her hand, and adding that fhe 
 would perhaps call upon her fometimes, and 
 would reward her more liberally if fhe 
 found that the boy was treated with kind- 
 nefs. The old woman having promifed to 
 treat him kindly, led him away, and the 
 coach drove on.
 
 iz. EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. II. 
 
 Qnaz ComseJia Mimus 
 Qws melior plorante gula ? Ju v. 
 
 'T^HE forlorn condition of this poor 
 boy, deftitute of father, mother, re- 
 lation, or protestor, fo ftrongly awakened 
 the humane feelings of Mrs. Barnet, that 
 hejr thoughts were divided between him and 
 her own child for the remainder of the 
 way; apd when fhe arrived at her own 
 feoufe, after giving her hufband a particular 
 account of every thing relative to the eftab- 
 lifhnaent of his daughter, fhe began the 
 hiftory of the workhoufe boy ; but fhe had 
 not proceeded far, when Mr. Barnet haftily 
 rung the bell to know whether dinner was 
 near ready, faying, " that be had eaten little 
 or nothing fince his breakfaft, and indeed 
 not a great deal then, owing to the careleflf- 
 nefs of the maid, who had not put butter 
 enough upon the toaft." " Why did you 
 
 not
 
 EDWARD. 13 
 
 not order her to make fome with more, my 
 dear ?" faid Mrs. Barnet. " Becaufe," re- 
 plied he, " I did not obferve it till I could 
 eat no more ; fo that, upon the whole, I 
 made a very uncomfortable breakfaft." 
 
 " I am forry for it," faid Mrs. Barnet ; 
 " but I hope you have had fomething 
 fmce." 
 
 " Very little," replied he ; " for I was put 
 fo out of humour with the toaft, that I 
 have had little or no appetite until now." 
 
 " That is provoking, indeed," faid Mrs. 
 Barnet, in a fympathifmg tone of voice* 
 " But here comes the dinner, and I truft 
 you will now be able to make up for the 
 lofs of your breakfaft." "I wifh to God, my 
 dear, the fifh be not overdone," cried Mr. 
 Barnet, fixing an alarmed look on the difh. 
 
 " Pray do not 'terrify yourfelf," replied 
 Mrs. Barnet ; "the fi(h is done to a moment; 
 and the veal, as well as the beans and bacon, 
 feem admirable allow me to help you." 
 
 Mrs, Barnet accordingly helped her huf- 
 band to every thing fhe knew he liked, 
 which, he being a man of few words, parti- 
 cularly
 
 14 EDWARD. 
 
 cularly at meals, accepted in filent compla- 
 cency. After having amply indemnified 
 himfelf for the misfortunes of the breakfaft, 
 and having attempted, in vain, to fwallow 
 another morfel, he looked with benignity at 
 .his wife, and faid, " I really wifh you would 
 eat a little bit yourfelf, my dear." 
 
 " I believe the parting with our fweet 
 girl has entirely deprived me of appetite ; it 
 is not in my power to eat much ; but, if 
 you pleafe, I will drink a glafs of wine 
 with you." 
 
 " I will juft take one draught more of 
 ale firft ; I believe there is but one other 
 draught in the tankard." 
 
 Mr. Barnet, having rimmed his ale, "Upon 
 my word," faid he, " this ale is excellent 
 and now, my dear, I am ready to join you 
 in a glafs of wine. Here, my dear, is your 
 very good health, with all my heart, not 
 forgetting our dear Louifa." 
 
 After Mr. Barriet had drank a few glafTes 
 
 more, and praifed the port as found, and 
 
 ftomachic, and of a good body;" I am glad 
 
 . to fee you here again, my dear," faid he ; 
 
 ' they
 
 EDWARD, 15 
 
 " they may talk of the comforts and con- 
 veniences of London as they pleafe, but I 
 think there is no place where one finds 
 every thing fo neat, and fo clean, and fo 
 comfortable, as in one's own houfe here, and 
 at one's own, good, warm, fnug firefide." 
 
 Mrs. Barnet, defirous of interefting her 
 hufband in the poor boy, thought this a good 
 opportunity, and after expreffing her own 
 fatisfaction in the thoughts of his finding 
 home fo agreeable, Ihe proceeded in the fol- 
 lowing terms: " Yet, my dear, in the midft 
 of thofe comforts which Providence has fo 
 bountifully beftowed upon us, it is impof- 
 fible not to feel uneafmefs in refleclirjg on 
 the numbers of our fellow -creatures, who, 
 inftead of thofe conveniences which we en- 
 joy, are fain, after fatigue and labour, to 
 feek a little refrefhment, and repofe upon 
 ftraw, in cold uncomfortable habitations, 
 and from fcanty provifions ! The fine boy, 
 whom I already mentioned, was going from 
 a workhoufe, to the miferable cottage of a 
 wretched old woman, who had no natural 
 intereft in him, and" 
 
 Here
 
 r6 EDWARD. 
 
 Here Mrs.Barnet ftopp'd,becaufe me per- 
 ceived that her hufband had fallen afleep. 
 
 The following day they had vifitors, and 
 Mrs. Barnet found no proper opportunity 
 of mentioning to her hufband the boy in 
 whom fhe felt fo flrong an intereft. The 
 day after, fhe was again prevented by the 
 following accident : A large company were 
 invited to dine on turtle, at an inn in the 
 village. This dinner was given by a gentle- 
 man, whofe intereft in the county Mr. 
 Barnet oppofed, of courfe he was not in- 
 vited to the feaft; but the inn-keeper, who 
 had private reafons for cultivating the good 
 will of Mr. Barnet, and knew by what 
 means that was to be moft effe&ually ob- 
 tained, gave him to know that a copious 
 bafon of the turtle fhould be fent to him. 
 Mr. Barnet having prepared himfelf for the 
 occaiion, by a longer airing than ufual, 
 was waiting with impatience for the ac- 
 compHihment of the inn-keeper's promife, 
 when he was informed, that in conveying 
 the foup from the inn, the fervant had 
 ftumbled, and fpik the rich cargo on the 
 
 ground.
 
 E D \V A R D. 17 
 
 ground. This melancholy accident affected 
 Mr. Barnet fo deeply, that his wife plainly 
 perceived it would be vain to expect that 
 he flioiikl, for that day at leaft, think of 
 any body's misfortune but his own. 
 
 VOL, I.
 
 i8 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. III. 
 
 How few, like thee, enquire the wretched out, 
 
 And court the offices of foft humanity ? ROWE. 
 
 / TpHE following morning, Mrs. Barnet, 
 on the pretext of paying an early 
 vifit, drove to the old woman's Cottage, to 
 enquire after the poor boy. 
 
 She foon obferved him fitting on a ftone 
 before the old woman's door, apart frorri 
 the other children, who were playing on 
 the heath. 
 
 He fprung, with extended arms, to- 
 wards Mrs. Barnet, as foon as he faw her. 
 
 " Why are you not playing with the other 
 children ?" faid ihe. 
 
 " Becaufe," faid he, " you promifed to 
 come and fee me, and I have watched for* 
 you ever fmce." 
 
 " That he has, indeed, madam," faid the 
 old woman, who came out of the hovel, 
 when fhe faw the carriage Hop ; " he has 
 
 been
 
 EDWARD. 19 
 
 been conftantly on the look-out from morn- 
 ing to night, although I told him '* Youfiily 
 fool," faid I, " do you think that that there 
 fine lady will take the trouble to come to fee 
 fuch a poor little wretch as you and what 
 does your ladyfhip think he anfwered ?" 
 
 " What did he anfwer?" laid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " Yes, I do think it," fays he; " for {he 
 promifed to do fo," faid he, " and the par- 
 fon of the workhoufe fchool told us, that 
 good folks always kept their promife," fays 
 he. tc And I am fure," continued the old 
 woman, " that your ladyfhip always will, 
 particularly to me, whereof your ladyfliip 
 muft remember that you promifed to re- 
 ward me, if fo be I treated this boy kindly, 
 which God he knows I have done, as in 
 duty bound.'* 
 
 *' Have you had any breakfaft, my dear?" 
 faid Mrs. Barnet to the boy. 
 
 " I was juft going to give him fome," 
 anfwered the old woman, " when your 
 ladymip arrived. Was I not, child ?" 
 
 " I don't know," faid the boy. 
 
 c 2 He
 
 o EDWARD. 
 
 " He does not underftand politenefs as 
 yet, pleafe your ladyfhip," faid the old 
 woman; " but I will foon teach him in 
 time; for indeed I was juft going to give 
 him fome breakfaft, as in duty bound.'* 
 
 Mrs. Barnet continued to talk with the 
 boy for a confiderabie time, and was high- 
 ly pleafed with all he faid. She then gave 
 fome money to the woman, repeating her 
 injunctions, " that fhe fhould be careful and 
 attentive to the boy;" and now, " my dear, 
 here is fomething for you, 1 * added (he; pre- 
 ienting him with a large fweet-cake. 
 
 " Are you going away already ?" faid the 
 boy, with a forrowful look. 
 
 " Yes, my dear, I muft go, 1 ' replied he. 
 
 " There," faid the boy, giving the cake 
 to the old woman, " you may divide that 
 among the children." 
 
 " Firft take fome yourfelf," rejoined the 
 old woman ; tearing off a piece, and offer- 
 ing it to the boy. 
 
 " No," faid he; "I do not like it now" 
 
 " You cannot choofe but like it," faid fhe, 
 taking a large bite of the cake herfelf. 
 
 " Here,
 
 EDWARD. 21 
 
 " Here, here," refumed fhe, as foon as {he 
 could articulate; " I aflure you it is very 
 nice, fo there is a piece for you." 
 
 " I cannot eat it now," replied he, reject- 
 ing the cake, and looking mournfully at 
 Mrs. Earner.. 
 
 " I will come and fee you again, my dear," 
 faid Mrs. Barnet, tapping his cheek; "but I 
 am obliged to go at prefent : pray be a 
 good boy." 
 
 " 1 cannot be a good boy," refumed he, 
 ready to cry; " when you are going away." 
 
 " I will foon return," faid (lie, " but pray 
 be good." 
 
 " I will try," faid the boy, with a fob ; 
 " but I fear I cannot." 
 
 Mrs. Barnet had not only a warm bene- 
 volent heart, but alfo fomething of a warm 
 imagination. The accidental manner in 
 which fhe had met with this boy, and the 
 fudden and growing intereft which his ap- 
 pearance, behaviour, and forlorn condition 
 created in her breaft, fhe confidered as the 
 impulfe of Providence urging her to fave a 
 tine boy from vice, infamy, and ruin. 
 
 c 3 Fraught
 
 32 E D W A R D. 
 
 Fraught with this idea, fhe returned to 
 her own houfe a little before her hufband 
 arofe ; and by the time he was drefled, fhe 
 had every thing arranged for his breakfaft. 
 
 Mr. Barnet entered the parlour with a 
 newfpaper in his hand, and what was fel- 
 dom the cafe, with a cheerful countenance. 
 
 " I fancy you have good news to com-' 
 municate," faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " Why, yes," faid he; " I find flocks have 
 rifea one and a half per cent, by which I 
 fruli gain a pretty round fum." 
 
 " 1 am glad to hear it," faid fhe, prefent- 
 ing him with a bafon of tea. 
 
 '* I do not fee why we fhould not have 
 a difii of john-dorys for dinner to-day, let 
 them coft what they will," refumed he. 
 
 " You fhall have it, my dear," faid Mrs. 
 Barnet ; " Til give orders about it diredly." 
 
 While Mrs. Barnet was giving the orders, 
 her hufband helped himfelf very plentifully 
 to the toad, which he found buttered to his 
 tafte. He continued to eat, with every ap- 
 pearance of fatisfadion, for a confiderable 
 time after his wife returned ; and when he 
 could eat no more, he prefented her a plate 
 *8 of
 
 EDWARD. 23 
 
 of toaft, with his ufual phrafe on like oc- 
 cafions " 1 really wtfb you 'would eat a 
 little bit yoiirfelf, my dear" 
 
 " With all my heart," faid Mrs. Barnet, 
 " for I rejoice to fee you look fo cheerful 
 and well this morning." 
 
 " Why truly," faid he, ftroking his 
 belly, u I do feel myfelf pretty comfortable." 
 
 Mrs, Barnet thinking this the lucky mo- 
 ment for renaming the ftory of the poor 
 boy defcribed his fine looks and helplefs 
 condition in fuch eloquent and pathetic 
 terms, that her hufband, in fpite of his na- 
 tural indifference to every thing which did 
 not perfonally regard himfelf, feemed a little 
 affected. Mrs. Barnet perceiving this, con- 
 tinued : 
 
 " I do aflure you, my dear, that you 
 never faw a prettier boy.'* 
 
 " I make no manner of doubt of it," faid 
 Mr. Barnet ; " but as for the old woman," 
 refumed his wife, "me feemed to be an 
 unfeeling creature, and fmelt of gin." 
 
 *' I make no manner of doubt of it," faid 
 Mr. Barnet, " for I have known feveral old 
 women fmell of gin." 
 
 c 4 u I am
 
 5 4 EDWARD. 
 
 " I am fure (he will negled: the poor 
 boy," refumed fhe. 
 
 u Well, my dear, fmce you are perfuaded 
 of that, I think we muft fend for the old wo- 
 man, and advife her to take care of him; and 
 1 am willing to give her a few (hillings out of 
 my pocket for fo doing ;" faid Mr. Barnet. 
 
 " That would make her promife to take 
 care of him," faid Mrs. Barnet, " and make 
 her appear very kind to him when you or 
 I are with her, but what will become of 
 the poor child when we are not prefent ?" 
 
 " Why, he muft take his chance, like 
 the other children," faid the hufband. 
 
 " The other children have all feme re- 
 lation to inquire about them," faid Mrs. 
 Barnet; "but this poor boy is quite deftitute 
 of relation, friend, or protector. The poor 
 creature himfelf told me that the only friend 
 he ever had, died laft week." 
 
 " And who was he ?" faid Mr. Barnet. 
 
 " A poor old foot-man," replied his wife, 
 
 " And are you making all this fufs, Jane, 
 
 about a little frieiidlefs vagabond, whom 
 
 nobody knows ?" faid Mr, Barnet. 
 
 "If
 
 EDWARD. 25 
 
 " If this poor boy were known and had 
 friends, he would not ftand in need of our 
 protection," replied Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " That is very true," faid Mr. Barnet ; 
 " but on the other hand, it is very hard on 
 us, to be the only protector of poor friend- 
 lefs vagabond boys." 
 
 u This is but one boy," replied Mrs. Bar- 
 net; " perhaps Providence will never throw 
 another fo particularly in our way*" 
 
 " Why truly, Jane, you furprife me," faid 
 the hufband ; " you feem to be as much 
 concerned about this boy, as if he were your 
 own." 
 
 " So would you^ if you had only feen 
 him ; he is a moft bewitching little fellow, 
 and although he is fomewhat pale and ema- 
 ciated, I never in my life beheld a boy 
 with finer features and a more interefting 
 countenance: he brought to my remem- 
 brance our own poor George, who is dead 
 and gone" Here me burft into tears, and 
 was unable to fpeak for a few minutes. 
 
 " Pray, do not afflict yourfelf for what 
 cannot be helped/ 3 faid Mr. Barnet ; " you 
 
 know,
 
 26 EDWARD. 
 
 know, my dear, we did all we could for George, 
 and the apothecary did all he could alfo ; he 
 could not have prefcribed a greater number 
 of draughts, and cordials, and julaps, to the 
 only fon of a Duke; for his bill was as long 
 as a fpit, fo there is no caufe for forrow or 
 reflection. And as for this hoipital boy, 
 although he is nothing to me, yet fince he 
 bears fuch a refemblance to George, I am 
 willing to make a weekly allowance, out of 
 my own pocket, to the old woman, to make 
 fcer careful of him." 
 
 Mrs. Barnet (hook her head. 
 
 " Why, what would you have me do ?" 
 refumed the hufband; " you would not furely 
 have me take him quite out of the hands of 
 the old woman, and be at the whole burden, 
 pf his maintenance myfelf !" 
 
 Mrs. Barnet fmiled with a nod of aflent. 
 
 " Good gracious, my dear! You do not 
 reflect," added the huiband, " bow ftrange a 
 thing it would be for us to take a poor mi- 
 ferable wretch of a boy, perhaps the fon 
 of a foot-man, under our care, and be at the 
 whole expence of maintaining him. I 
 
 (hould
 
 EDWARD. 27 
 
 fhould be glad to know who will thank us 
 for it?" 
 
 " Our own hearts," faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " My heart never thanked me for any 
 fuch thing fmce I was born," faid Mr. Bar> 
 net, " and I am fure all our acquaintances 
 would laugh at us, and turn us into ridi- 
 cule." 
 
 " All the laughters in the world cannot 
 turn benevolence into ridicule," faid Mrs. 
 Barnet j " and the narrow minded may be 
 hurt to fee you do what they cannot imitate ; 
 but malice itfelf can neither prevent the 
 pleafure which a charitable action will af- 
 ford to your own breaft, my dear, nor the 
 refpect which will attend it." 
 "So your drift is," replied the hufband, 
 " to teafe me till I take this boy into my 
 houfe." 
 
 " My drift has never been to teafe you, 
 but always to make you happy, my dear. 
 I own I am affeded with the friendlefs 
 condition of this poor orphan, and ftruck 
 with his refemblance to the child who was 
 torn from us at the fame age ; as for the 
 
 poor
 
 28 EDWARD. 
 
 poor young creature's maintenance, it will 
 be a mere trifle to us, but of infinite im- 
 portance to him ; it may fave him from 
 vice, and the worft kind of ruin. The 
 reflection of having done fo charitable an 
 office to a lovely boy, like your own de- 
 parted fon, would no doubt afford you 
 cverlafting fatisfaction : but," continued (he, 
 perceiving that her hufband began to be 
 affected, " I defire you to do nothing which 
 is not prompted by the generous feelings 
 of your own heart; for of this I am certain, 
 that your acting up to them will ren- 
 der you more profperous even in this 
 world, and fecure you a reward of an hun- 
 dred fold in the next." 
 
 The earneflnefs of Mrs. Barnet's man- 
 ner, and the recollection of a fon whom he 
 had loved as much as he could love any 
 thing, had already touched the heart of the 
 hufband; and this laft intimation of im- 
 mediate profperity and future reward, found- 
 ing in his ears fomething like accumulated 
 intereft and a large premium, came neareft 
 his feelings, and overcame him entirely. 
 
 " Well,
 
 EDWARD. 29 
 
 " Well, my dear," faid he, <c fmce this 
 is your opinion, let the boy be brought 
 hither as foon as you pleafe." 
 
 Mrs. Barnet threw her arms around her 
 Imfband's neck, and thanked him with all 
 the warmth of an overflowing and bene- 
 volent heart.
 
 30 EDWARD* 
 
 CHAP. IV. 
 Grief and Decorum. 
 
 A S it is not uncommon for people to take 
 an intereft in a man for the fake of 
 his wife, the reader may wifti to know 
 fomething of Mr. Barnet ; and how he 
 came to be the hufband of a woman whofe 
 character was fo eflentially different from 
 his. Befides, as it is generally allowed, 
 that Nature does nothing in vain ; and yet, 
 if all Mr. George Barnet's acquaintances 
 had been put to the rack, none of them 
 could have mentioned any utility that he , 
 had ever been of; in vindication of Nature, 
 it is neceflary to prove, that this was not 
 her work; and to {hew by what means he 
 came to be perverted from a being who might 
 have been of fome uie in the world, into the 
 very ufelefs animal he really was ; particu- 
 larly, as what Mr. George Barnet was, of 
 much about it, feveral wealthy inhabitants 
 
 of
 
 EDWARD. 3 t 
 
 of this metropolis, from fimilar caufes, are. 
 Finally, it is incumbent on us to go a little 
 into the hiftory of the Barnet family, be- 
 caufe this is fo much connected with the 
 principal perfon of this work, that we might 
 have begun with it, and never mentioned 
 the workhoufe boy until we arrived at the 
 time when Mrs. Barnet picked him up on 
 the read, had we not always had an unfur-* 
 mountable diflike to that methodical way of 
 proceeding. 
 
 Mr. Barnet, the father of George, was 
 originally a clerk to an eminent merchant 
 in the city of London, whofe daughter he 
 fecretly married. Although born and bred 
 in an inferior fphere of life, and remote 
 from the court, Mr. Barnet poflefled fome 
 of the moft diftinguifhed qualities of a 
 courtier a heart cold and indifferent about 
 the happinefs or mifery of the whole hu- 
 man race, and a mind entirely occupied 
 with plans for his own intereft and ad- 
 vancement. He was certainly a man of 
 Uncommon addrefs, for foorr after his mar- 
 riage he contrived not only to obtain the 
 
 forgivenefs -
 
 32 EDWARD. 
 
 forgivsnefs but alfo the friendmip of his 
 father-in-law, by whom he was, at no ad- 
 vanced period of life, introduced into fome 
 profitable branches of trade j and fuch was 
 his afiiduity in bufmefs, and plaufibility of 
 deportment, that he was even raifed to the 
 dignity of alderman much earlier than is 
 ufual. This piece of good fortune feemed 
 to be overbalanced by the lofs of his lady, 
 xvho died in confequence of a cold caught 
 on the Thames on a lord mayor's day, 
 or in returning from the ball the fame even- 
 ing ; for the two phyficians who attended 
 her, were of different opinions on that fub- 
 je<3: one infilling that the piercing and 
 jnoift air on the river was the caufe of the 
 deceafe ; the other being clear that it was 
 entirely owing to the night air, as fhe re- 
 turned from the manfion-houfe^ after being 
 heated with dancing. 
 
 Mr. Barnet was furprifed that thefe learn- 
 ed gentlemen fhould put fo great a ftrefs on 
 a circumftance which he thought of little 
 importance; becaufe, whether fhe caught 
 her complaint on land or water, his wife 
 5 was
 
 EDWARD. 33 
 
 was indifputably dead. But as he was fa- 
 tisfied, on the whole, with the manner in 
 xvhich they treated her complaint, he took 
 rio notice of their difputes, however much 
 they furprifed him. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet was the intimate friend of the 
 then Lady Mayorefs, and attended her on 
 that fplendid occafion. Her ladyfhip, two 
 or three times during the ceremonies of that 
 day, obferved that Mrs. Barnet was unufual- 
 ly thoughtful, and enquired the reafon. 
 The anfwers me received were rather evafive, 
 becaufe Mrs. Barnet was at thofe times an- 
 ticipating in her imagination, the magnifi- 
 cence of a future day, which me hoped was 
 at no great diftance, when her own huf- 
 band being Lord Mayor, me herfelf would 
 of courfe be the principal figure at the ball. 
 Few things could more ftrongly illuftrate 
 the vanity of human hopes and wifhes, for 
 while this poor lady was indulging her 
 imagination in this manner, (he had already 
 imbibed the feeds of the difeafe of which 
 me died a few months after. 
 
 VOL. I. D This
 
 34 EDWARD. 
 
 This mournful event occurred feveral 
 years after the happieft union, as Mr. Bar- 
 net aflerted, that ever had exifled between 
 man and wife. 
 
 This aflertion, it is true, did not quite 
 accord with the obfervation of fome of 
 their acquaintance, who pretend to have been 
 witnefles to frequent fcenes of (harp alterca- 
 tion between this happy couple. Mr. Bar- 
 net, however, maintained, that thefe fcenes 
 were merely jocular, and never took place, 
 except when fomebody was prefent j but that 
 when his wife and he were by themfelves, 
 they never had a difpute, not even in jeft. 
 
 At the time that Mr. Barnet loft his lady, 
 he was fo much engrofied by bufinefs, that 
 it was highly inconvenient for him to. give 
 way to the emotions of grief; yet being a 
 man of flrict decorum, he thought it becom- 
 ing to feqnefter himfelf, for a certain period, 
 from the Royal Exchange, or from tranf- 
 acling bufinefs in public. The period he 
 fixed upon was two months, both becaufe 
 he thought it of a decent length, and becaufe 
 fuch an interval of afflictive retirement was 
 
 favourable
 
 EDWARD. 35 
 
 favourable for the examination of his ledgers, 
 journals, and accounts, and the general 
 arrangements of his affairs. 
 
 He might poffibly have extended the 
 term of his forrow ftill further, had he not 
 known that an increafe of the royal family 
 was expected about that period; and he 
 Imagined that it would have the appearance 
 of diiaffection, for a man like him, in a pub- 
 lic capacity, to feem fad, when it was the 
 the duty of every loyal fubjed to rejoice. 
 
 About a week after the time fixed upon 
 for the period of Mr. Barnet's forrow, this 
 happy event took place, and he joined with- 
 out fcruple in the public demonstrations of 
 
 This occafion of general joy was follow- 
 ed by one particularly gratifying to Mr. 
 Earner, for being of the deputation which 
 carried the congratulatory addrefs to St. 
 James's, he had the honour of knight- 
 hood conferred on him ; immediately after 
 Xvhich he retired for a week to his houfe in 
 the country, as if it were to give frefh vent 
 to his forrow for his late lofs, or to avoid 
 D 2 the
 
 3 6 EDWARD. 
 
 the imputation of an oftentatious fondnefs 
 of his new dignity. If the laft was his rea- 
 fon, it was in fome meafure defeated ; for 
 the curate of the parifh where Sir Robert's 
 country refidence was, having deferred the 
 lady's funeral fermon until her hufband 
 could have the pleafure of hearing it, de- 
 clared from the pulpit, after enumerating 
 the virtues of the deceafed, that the honour 
 conferred on her hufband was a juft reward 
 for the exemplary forrow he had manifefted 
 for the lofs of fo deferving a lady. 
 
 Some years previous to this, Sir Robert 
 had loft his father-in-law, whofe relicl: had 
 been fo enraged at her daughter's marriage 
 with a perfon in the fituation of a clerk, 
 that it was not in her hufband's power to 
 prevail on her to behave with any appear- 
 ance of kiridnefs to her daughter from the 
 time it took place. She never heard the 
 name of Barnet mentioned with pleafure, 
 till the addition of Sir, inftead of Mr., was 
 put before it. This indeed produced a won- 
 derful change in the behaviour of this hi- 
 therto obdurate old woman j all that cold 
 
 difdain
 
 EDWARD. 37 
 
 difdain and hardened indignation, which 
 had refitted the influence of maternal affec- 
 tion, and the intreaties of her hufband, were 
 diflblved by the new dignity of her fon-in- 
 law, as ice is diflblved by the beams of the 
 fun. She now addrefled him in the moft 
 obfequious manner, fpoke of him in the moft 
 foothing terms, and feemed peculiarly fond 
 
 of talking of her dear Sir Robert. As for 
 
 the Knight himfelf, he would have paid lit- 
 tle regard to the wavering afFedions of the 
 old lady, had he not known that her hnf- 
 band,befides an ample jointure, had left her 
 a very confiderable fumin the funds, entirely 
 at her difpofal, and which he expected fhe 
 would leave to his children. He received 
 her advances therefore, with more com- 
 placency than he would otherwife have 
 done; for having long known that fhe dif- 
 liked him, he had a fixed averfion to her. 
 
 When the period which Sir Robert had 
 allotted for grief was over, he returned to 
 the occupations of commerce with as much 
 eagernefs as eyer ; fo that none but thofe to 
 whom he imparted the fecret, had any no- 
 tion that his affliction was poignant. 
 
 P3
 
 3 8 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. V. 
 
 For fools are ftubborn in their way, 
 
 As coins are harden'd by t}\' allay ; 
 
 And obiunacy's ne'er fo ftiff, 
 
 As when 'tis in a wrong belief. CUTLER. 
 
 RS. Barnet left two fon3 and a daugh- 
 ter. The fons were at fchool when their 
 mother died. Sir Robert allowed them to 
 remain there for two years, when the elder 
 being exceffively heated with playing at 
 cricket, happened to throw himlelf on the 
 ground while damp, in confequence of which 
 he caught a pleurify, of which he died in a 
 few days, in fpite of the moft judicious 
 treatment. 
 
 The old lady was enraged that the phyfi- 
 cian in whom (he had mcft confidence had 
 not been employed ; and when fhe was in- 
 formed of the manner in which the boy 
 had been treated by thofe who had attended 
 him, (he declared that he had been mur- 
 dered; and advifed Sir Robert to puofecute 
 9 both
 
 EDWARD. 39 
 
 both the phyfician and apothecary, coft 
 what it might. 
 
 Sir Robert obferved in anfwer to this, 
 " That he did not value the experice, but that 
 it would be difficult to prove the fad. 1 * She 
 anfwered, " That nothing would be more 
 cafy, becaufe the apothecary acknowledged 
 that he had blooded the boy three times, by 
 the phyfician's direction, in the fpace of two 
 days ; and moreover had applied a blifter to 
 the very fide where the poor child's pain 
 was; and that me would bring witnefTes 
 to fwear, that a large difcharge had been 
 produced by the blifter, and that they had 
 heard the apothecary encouraging him to 
 drink plentifully of barley-water, and other 
 weakening liquors ; which treatment me 
 averred was enough to kill, not only a 
 weakly (tripling like her grandfon, but 
 Samfori himfelf even when his hair was 
 at the longeft." 
 
 Sir Robert replied, " That he would not 
 
 pretend circumftantially to refute her rea- 
 
 foning, becaufe me had more ikill in phyfic 
 
 than he ; but ftill he could not fufpeift that 
 
 D 4 the
 
 40 E D W A R D. 
 
 the doctor or apothecary could have any in- 
 tention to kill his fon, becaufe it was plainly 
 their intereft that he mould recover." 
 
 " Intereft, or not intereft," cried this vio- 
 lent old woman, " it is certain that they 
 drew out all the poor child's blood, and then 
 poured in nothing but watery liquors in 
 its place; and laftly, to prevent the dear 
 infant from dying with tolerable eafe, they 
 had the cruelty to apply a monftrous blifter 
 to his fide* If you do not call this murder, 
 I would be glad to know what you are 
 pleafed to call it ?" 
 
 " In anfvver to this," Sir Robert faid, " I 
 will not take upon me to call it any thing ; 
 but, I thank God, I have more charity, than 
 to fufpect men of committing a crime by 
 which they know they mud be out of 
 pocket; befides, bleeding and bliftering were, 
 perhaps, the propereft things that could be 
 done in fuch a cafe." 
 
 " That is impoffible," replied the lady ; 
 *' for they are contrary to Dr. Trufles' me- 
 thod." 
 
 " What is his method 2" faid Sir Robert. 
 
 " I will
 
 EDWARD. 4 i 
 
 *' I will inform you of his method," an- 
 fwered me; " for he acquainted me with it 
 himfelf, which made me employ him ever 
 lince. He orders no medicine but what is 
 warm and comfortable to the flomach ; and 
 the regimen he prefcribes, confifts of nou- 
 rifhing ibups and jellies, which, he fay?, 
 fupport the fyftem, and not hot water and 
 bleeding, like Doctor Sangrado, who flarvcs 
 his patients." 
 
 " Who is Dodor Sangrado r" faid Sir 
 Robert. 
 
 " I know nothing farther about him," re- 
 plied me, " for I never employed him my- 
 felf ; but I fuppofe he is fome Scotch Doctor, 
 for none could have a prejudice in favour 
 of ftarving, but thofe who are accuftomed 
 to it from their infancy." 
 
 " I would not however have you to rely 
 too much on Dr. Trufles' {kill," refumed 
 Sir Robert; " for Lady Dumpling died un- 
 der his care laft week." 
 
 " Ah ! that was no fault of Dr. Trufles," 
 faid the lady, t{ but entirely owing to her 
 being ftruck all at once with an apoplexy, 
 
 before
 
 42 EDWARD. 
 
 before he had time to order any thing to 
 fupport the fyftem; but the Doctor's me- 
 thod was fucceeding fo well with her, that 
 he was amazingly plump, and had eat a 
 very hearty meal only an hour before the 
 apoplexy feized her." 
 
 The Knight declined reafoning any more 
 \vith her, but he continued determined not 
 to begin a profecution, which he thought 
 would, in fpite of all her arguments, in- 
 volve him in expence to no purpofe. 
 
 The old lady then defired, " that he 
 would at leaft remove George from the 
 fchool where his brother was murdered ;" 
 telling him, " that there was an excellent 
 fchool at the village near which her houfe 
 in the country was; that while the matter 
 inftrucled boys, his wife took care of girls, 
 and there were good accomodations for both. 
 She begged therefore that George and his 
 fitter might be placed at this fchool, where 
 they would have the advantage of her fu- 
 perintending both their health and educa- 
 
 tion." 
 
 Soi
 
 EDWARD. 43 
 
 Sir Robert did not think it prudent to 
 refufe this requeft ; George and his filter 
 were accordingly fent to this fchool. 
 
 It was well known that Sir Robert's 
 earneft defire was to be what is called the 
 founder of a family, and had deftined al- 
 moft the whole of his fortune to his eldeft 
 fon. George was early informed, that he 
 would have a very fmall portion, and that 
 his figure in life would depend in a great 
 meafure on his own exertions ; in confe- 
 quence of which, he did fhew a defire and 
 capacity for improvement. It is not likely 
 that he would in any cafe have become a 
 prodigy of genius, but there is reafon to be- 
 lieve that if the elder brother had lived, 
 George would have been a happier and 
 more refpedable man than he afterwards 
 turned out to be. 
 
 From the time of his brother's death, 
 George perceived that he was a perfon of 
 infinitely more importance than he had 
 been before. He was now treated as the 
 heir of an immenfe fortune ; he was in- 
 formed
 
 44 EDWARD. 
 
 formed that every thing was provided for 
 him, and that all kind of diligence or exer- 
 tion on his part was fuperfluous. 
 
 Such ideas have a tendency to form the 
 character at a more early period of life than 
 is generally fufpeded. There is every reafon 
 to think that they palfied the exertions 
 of poor George Barnet, and made him fink 
 into that indolence from which he never 
 emerged. 
 
 The grandmother eafily prevailed on 
 Sir Robert, to removie him and his filler to 
 the new fchool, where fhe promifed to pay 
 a very careful attention to both, but kept 
 her promife only refpecting George ; the 
 fifter fhe entirely neglected, having taken 
 a prejudice againft her from the moment 
 fhe was chriftened, and for this cogent rea- 
 fon, becaufe the infant, inftead of being 
 named Martha, which was the old lady's 
 name, had been called Catherine, after her 
 own mother, againft whom the grand- 
 mother's indignation ftili exifted. But the 
 mafter and miftrefs of this fchool being peo- 
 ple of fome fenfe and integrity, paid a mod 
 8 con-
 
 EDWARD. 45 
 
 confcientious attention to Catherine, and it 
 was owing to their care, Catherine's docili- 
 ty, and her grandmother's total neglect, 
 that the girl made many ufeful acquire- 
 ments during her ftay at this boarding- 
 fchool. George, on the other hand, had ac- 
 quired nothing during the three years he 
 remained there, except a flight knowledge- 
 in fiftiing, by conftant practice in a neigh- 
 bouring pond ; but as he had grown con- 
 fiderably taller, his grandmother thought 
 it time that he fhould be removed, and 
 therefore (he wrote the following epiftle to 
 her fon-in-law : 
 
 " My dear Sir Robert, 
 
 " I have the pleafure to inform you, that 
 " our fweet George is by far the moft ac- 
 " complifhed child of his age I ever knew, 
 '* and promifes to be an ornament to his 
 " king and country. He has already learnt 
 " all that can be taught at the prefent fchool, 
 " befides acquiring feveral talents of his 
 " own accord, by the light of nature. 
 
 " He feems now to have a thorough 
 " averfion to this fchool; therefore to keep 
 
 " him
 
 4 6 EDWARD. 
 
 " him longer there might damp his fpirits^ and 
 " alfo endanger his health; for I underftand 
 " that feme of the children are troubled 
 " with worms, which is a very infectious 
 u diftemper. I therefore propofe, with your 
 " permiffion, to take him home to my own 
 " houfe, having engaged a man of genius, 
 " on moderate terms, as his tutor, and fitted 
 "up an apartment for them, which has a 
 " view of the London road, and will pre- 
 " vent the boy from wearying when he is 
 " at his ftudies. 
 
 " As to my laft complaint, about which 
 <c you exprefs fo much kind concern, it 
 " neither was a flying gout as Dr. Hum 
 " thought it, nor bilious according to Dr. 
 " Flum, but entirely wind, which is now 
 " happily difperfed. Dr. Truffles aflures me, 
 " that he knew this all along, though he 
 " neve/* mentioned it for fear of alarming 
 me. 
 
 " My dear Sir Robert, I hope to hear by 
 " the next poft, that you approve of my 
 " plan refpedting George j for it would be a 
 *' pity to lofe any more time, as his cham- 
 " bers, as well as the man of genius, are 
 
 " ready
 
 EDWARD. 47 
 
 " ready prepared. When you know the 
 " terms on which I have engaged the latter, 
 " you will own that I have got a great 
 " pennyworth. 
 
 " I am, my dear Sir Robert, 
 
 " Your ever affectionate mother, 
 " MARTHA NICHOLSON." 
 
 By the return of the poft ihe received 
 this anfwer from Sir Robert : 
 
 " Dear Madam, 
 
 " Your favour is before me. Cannot but 
 " approve of your proceedings refpecting 
 ** George, and am happy to hear he is fo 
 u accompliihed. It is lucky that you have 
 " made fo good a bargain with a man of 
 " genius, which, as I have been told, is a 
 " fcarce commodity this fcafon. 
 
 " Your old friend lady Pam called, in 
 " her return from the magnetifmg Doctor, 
 " to inquire after you. I fhewed her your 
 " letter; fhe fays, the Doctor has almoft 
 " quite cured her of her paralytic diforder, 
 " being able to play a little at loo every 
 " evening, only her daughter is obliged to 
 " hold her cards. She ftrongly recom- 
 
 " mends
 
 48 EDWARD. 
 
 * l mends her Doctor to you, in cafe your 
 <c complaint fhould return ; for her Doctor 
 " aflures her, thac all windy defeafes pro- 
 " ceed from the nervous fyftem, for which, 
 44 according to him, animal magnetifm is 
 " the only remedy. But in this I own I 
 *' am no judge, being with great efteem, 
 
 " Dear Madam, 
 
 " Your dutiful fon, and obedient fervant, 
 " R. BARNET." 
 
 Young Barnet was removed accordingly 
 from the fcbcol to his grandmother's, where 
 he was treated in the moft delicate manner, 
 and fed with every dainty of the feaion. 
 
 The chief bufmefs of the tutor was to 
 watch over his health, accompany him when 
 he went a riming, an amufement of which 
 he became daily fonder, and fometimes to 
 ride out with ]pim on horfeback; but the 
 old lady more frequently chole to take him 
 \fi the chariot when ihe herfelf took an air- 
 ing ; and indeed (lie was for feveral years 
 his moft conftant companion, that he might 
 reap the benefit of her inftructions, and alfo 
 becaufe, as (he herfelf obferved, her prefence 
 
 was
 
 EDWARD. 49 
 
 was a moft effectual method of deterring bad 
 company from approaching him. 
 
 George was not naturally a youth of a 
 violent or a headftrong temper ; on the con- 
 trary, he was rather inclined to avoid con- 
 teft, and yield to refinance Yet the excef- 
 five indulgence of his grandmother, and the 
 conftant attention paid to all his humours by 
 thofe who frequented her houfe, gradually 
 rendered him opinionative and conceited; he 
 acquired the habit of dictating, and at _laft 
 could not bear any difference in opinion. 
 Yet, inftead of fupporting his opinions by 
 argument, his method of reafoning was to 
 repeat his afTertions when contradicted with 
 more force than he had made them at firft : 
 if, for example, he accidentally faid, * e that 
 his horfe could trot fourteen miles in an 
 hour," and any body hinted a doubt, or ex> 
 prefled furprife, he immediately aflerted, 
 " that the horfe could trot twenty ;" and the 
 energy of his affertions ufually kept pace 
 with the ftrength of the arguments ufed 
 againft them, and the improbability of what 
 he himfelf fapported. 
 
 VOL. I. E
 
 50 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. VI. 
 
 Eamus 
 Quo ducit gula. Hon.' 
 
 A S Sir Robert Barnet's mind was entire- 
 ly engrofled by the purfuk of riches, he 
 paid little attention to the education of his 
 fon, but allowed him to live with his grand- 
 mother till he arrived at that age when 
 he thought it would be proper to inftruft 
 the young man in mercantile bufmefs. - 
 Sir Robert took a good deal of pains to con- 
 vince his mother-in-law of the propriety of 
 this meafure, and at laft prevailed on her to 
 agree to his leaving her houfe, and remov* 
 ing to his in the city. 
 
 This alteration was iefs difagreeable fof 
 fome time to George than he expected; 
 for as it was the feafon when turtle is mofl 
 plentiful, Sir Robert was in a courfe of en- 
 tertaining and being entertained by his city 
 friends, and his fon was frequently invited 
 
 to
 
 EDWARD. 51 
 
 to the turtle and venifon feafts with which 
 thofe luxurious traders regale each other. 
 George had {hewn an early tafte for good 
 living, a phrafe which at prefent implies good 
 eating. This tafte was greatly improved at 
 his grandmother's, who kept an excellent 
 cook, and fpared no expence on her table, 
 where George heard many enlightened con- 
 verfations on the comparative merit of the 
 refpective difhes, and became an adept both 
 in the theory and practice of this fcience. 
 
 His knowledge of the beft difhes and the 
 tnoft delicate parts of each di(h, gave him a 
 vaft advantage over the ignorant. Theit 
 blunders were a fertile fubject of George's 
 ridicule at every feaft. He tippM the wink 
 to fome knowing friend as often as he per- 
 ceived them neglecting the delicate bits and 
 devouring the coarfe; he never failed to 
 give a bad character of every difh he pre- 
 ferred, that it might fall to his own fhare 
 or thofe of his favourites ; and on all thofe 
 occafions he looked as waggifh and ironical, 
 as the flat rotundity of his countenance 
 Would permit. Thus accompliihed, George 
 E 2 was
 
 S 2 E D W A R D. 
 
 was confidered as a fmart young mail 
 by many of the guefts during the feafon 
 of feftivity and feafting; but it muft be 
 confefled at the fame time, that this was the 
 -^pnly branch of his father's bufmefs which 
 he ever underflcod, or in which he had the 
 leafl wifh to take a fhare. Sir Robert how- 
 ever was at confidcrable pains to give his 
 fwi ufeful ideas concerning commerce in 
 genera], and his own in particular point- 
 ing out fuch vaft and various fources of 
 wealth, as he thought would excite avidity 
 and ftimulate exertion : But as George 
 bad been nurfed from his birth in the lap 
 of affluence, and had hardly ever felt the 
 waut of money, it was impoffible to give 
 him the fame ardour for accumulating that 
 his father had; befides, his faculties were 
 already too much benumbed with indolence 
 to bear trouble or application of any kind. 
 The young man was fo confcious of this 
 averfion to bufmefs, that he viewed the 
 rich profpets which his father pointed out, 
 as Mofes viewed the land of promife, from 
 caount Nebc, with a certitude that by his 
 3 own
 
 EDWARD. 53 
 
 own exertions he never could attain the 
 objecls he contemplated. 
 
 In fpite of Sir Robert's remonftrances, 
 inftead of attending the counting houfe, 
 George fpent his time in parties to the 
 country, or in lounging at the public places 
 with a few young men of the city, in whom 
 the fruits of their fathers' induftry had pro- 
 duced no other effect than infpiring them 
 with contempt for the fource from which 
 they were derived. 
 
 Sir Robert had known young men, who 
 from levity and thoughtlefTnefs were care- 
 Jefs of reputation; others who difregard- 
 ed the diftinclions of rank and titles ; 
 he had been acquainted with fome few 
 who were infenfible to the allurements of 
 beauty. All thofe difpofitions he thought 
 extraordinary, yet ftill he could account 
 for their exiftence in the human breaft; 
 but that any man, young or old, fhoukj 
 have a fair profpecl: of acquiring an im-* 
 menfe fortune, (which in Sir Robert's opi- 
 nion comprehended reputation, honours, 
 influence, the pofleffion of beauty, and all 
 E 3 that
 
 \ 
 54 EDWARD. 
 
 that is gratifying to the heart of man,) 
 and behold fuch a profpeft with indifference, 
 was what he could not comprehend, and 
 he thought it fo particularly improbable 
 that a child of his could be of fuch a dif- 
 ppfition, that if he had ever entertained any 
 fufpicions of his wife's infidelity this would 
 have confirmed them. 
 
 One day, after having enumerated the ad- 
 vantages of a new fpeculation in trade which 
 he meditated, and endeavoured to convince 
 his fon that this alone, if carefully conduct- 
 ed, would prove a permanent fource of opu- 
 lence, he added, " but above all things re- 
 member, that this requires great alertnefs, 
 activity, and attention on our part ; no 
 fcheme of this nature can be rendered fuc- 
 cefsful without conftant and laborious at- 
 tention for a certain time, after which it 
 will go on of itfelf, with a moderate in- 
 fpedion and then, my boy, we will enjoy 
 the fruits of our labour." 
 
 Perceiving that his fon heard all this with 
 little or no emotion " Good God !" cried 
 he, u George, are you awake ?" " Awake," 
 
 repeated^
 
 EDWARD. 55 
 
 repeated George, rubbing his eyes " I be- 
 lieve fo." 
 
 " I am glad of it," faid Sir Robert, " for you 
 look'd as cold and indifferent as if you had 
 been at church, or as if I had been repeat- 
 ing one of the fermons which parfon Drow- 
 fy preaches to your grandmother in the 
 country." 
 
 " The very laft fermon I heard the par- 
 fon preach," faid George, " was fomething 
 to the fame purpofe.'' 
 
 " To the fame purpofe ! How do you 
 mean?" 
 
 * Yes, indeed," replied George, " it feem- 
 cd pretty much to the fame purpofe ; for the 
 whole tendency of his difcourfe was, that 
 we ought to watch and pray, and labour 
 without ceafmg, that we might enjoy a trea- 
 fure hereafter. And Jack Revel, whom 
 my grandmother had coaxed that day to 
 church, whifpered in my ear, That is as 
 much as to fay, make fure of Hell while 
 you live, and you will go to Heaven perhaps 
 when you die." 
 
 E 4 Jack
 
 56 EDWARD. 
 
 " Jack Revel is a worthlefs profligate, 
 and a fool befides," cried Sir Robert ; " for 
 how can the acquifitioii of riches, which 
 makes a heaven on earth, be compared to 
 hell?" 
 
 " The labour of gathering them would 
 be purgatory to me," anfwered George. 
 
 After this converfation Sir Robert de-* 
 fpaired of his fon's ever making any figure 
 as a merchant; inftead of teafing the young 
 man and vexing himfelf therefore by fruit- 
 lefs perfuafions, he began to revolve in his 
 mind in what line of life his fon had a 
 chance of making a more decent appearance. 
 Mr. Quirk his attorney happened to call 
 on Mm while he was meditating on the. 
 fubjed j Sir Robert mentioned it to him ~ 
 Mr. Quirk had on two or three occafions 
 been witnefs to young George's obftinacy in 
 difpute and perfevefance in fupporting a bad 
 caufe: " On this foundation," he faid, " there 
 was reafon to believe that the young gentle- 
 man was pcflefled of very promifing talents 
 for the bar ;" but Sir Robert infifted " that 
 George was by much too indolent for that 
 
 prp-?
 
 EDWARD. 57 
 
 profeflion and he feared had not capacity 
 fufficient for conducting any branch of com- 
 merce ; we mud therefore think," added he, 
 *' of fome kind of employment which will 
 give him little trouble and requires but a 
 moderate extent of capacity." 
 
 " You had beft put him into parliament 
 then," faid Mr. Quirk; "that gives little 
 trouble, and has fucceeded wonderfully with 
 men of as moderate capacities as are to be 
 met with." 
 
 As feveral examples, ftrongly corrobora- 
 tive of the attorney's aflertion, occurred to 
 Sir Robert in the inftant, he feemed to relilh 
 the propofal, and invited Mr. Quirk to flay 
 and dine, for there was to be no company but 
 George. The attorney confented, and after 
 dinner Sir Robert aiked his fon " How he 
 ihould like to be a Member of the Houfe of 
 Commons ?" 
 
 On Mr. George's hefitating, Mr. Quirk 
 adjoined, " it is a very honourable fituation 
 for young men who have nothing to do, and 
 it requires neither application nor ftudy." 
 
 "What
 
 58 EDWARD. 
 
 " What does it require then ?" faid 
 George. 
 
 '< It requires money to purchafe a feat/' 
 anfwered Mr. Quirk. 
 
 " Which I am willing to advance/* 
 added Sir Robert. 
 
 " I believe the houfe meets at the hour of 
 dinner," faid George, "and fome of the 
 Members make defperate long fpeeches." 
 
 " The young gentleman's remark is equal- 
 ly acute and juft,'' rejoined the attorney,, 
 looking to Sir Robert ; " neverthelefs, I can 
 allure him, that any Member may withdraw 
 \vhen he is tired, whether at the beginning,, 
 middle, or end of a fpeech.'* 
 
 " Are you abfolutely certain of that ?' 
 added Mr. George. 
 
 " Abfolutely certain," replied Mr. Quirk, 
 * otherwife who would be a Member of Par- 
 liament ?" 
 
 " Not I, for one," anfwered Mr. George. 
 
 " You need be under no appreh^nfion of 
 that fort ; for no fuch ftricl attendance as you 
 dread is required," faid Mr. Quirk. 
 
 " I Ihould
 
 EDWARD, 59 
 
 " I fhpuld be glad to know what is ab- 
 folutely requifite in a Member of Parlia T 
 jnent," faid George, 
 
 " Only that you fhould be able to fay 
 Ay or No," faid Sir Robert, a little angrily, 
 " Will that fatisfy you ?" 
 
 " Very well, Sir," replied George, bowing 
 to his father ; " I have now no objection to 
 feeing in parliament.'*
 
 CHAP. VII. 
 
 Crefcit amor nummi, quantum ipfa pecunia crefcit. 
 
 JUVEN. 
 
 >TpHE contraft between the characters o 
 ^ the father and the fon, however great 
 it may fecm, in all probability depended on 
 the different fituadons in which they began 
 life, and not on any great difference of their 
 natural powers or difpofitions. The former 
 fet out in narrow circumftances, goaded to 
 early exertions by the apprehenfions of 
 poverty, and a full conviction that he 
 had nothing to rely upon but his per- 
 fonal diligence; habit rendered application 
 in a ihort time eafy, and the increafing 
 wealth which attended this application at 
 laft communicated to it a fenfe of pleafure. 
 Whereas the latter, from the time of his 
 brother's death, knew that he was heir to, 
 an opulent fortune, that his wants would 
 all be fupplied without any labour of his 
 
 own.
 
 EDWARD. 61 
 
 own, and being devoid of every kind of 
 ambition, lie was foon infected with indo- 
 lence, a difeafe whofe nature it is to aug- 
 ment every moment, and the more hope- 
 lefs, becaufe, not being like many other 
 diftempers removable by the mere efforts of 
 nature, it ftands in need of the affiftance of 
 art an affiftant which in George's cafe was 
 never called in. 
 
 In many particulars the father and Ton 
 were congenial, both being narrow minded 
 and felfim ; only the felfilhnefs of the father 
 appeared in his affiduous application to 
 one objed, to which in his mind all others 
 were fubordinate, namely, the accumulation 
 of wealth ; whereas the felfimnefs of the fon 
 manifefted itfelf in the indulgence of eafe 
 and gratification of appetite at whatever ex-" 
 pence. 
 
 George was at no pains to conceal his 
 predominant propentities; he probably found 
 many people to fympathize with him, and 
 therefore the pleafiires of the table formed 
 a principal topic of his converfation ; but a 
 fpirit of covetoumefs is fo odious and un- 
 
 fociable,
 
 62 fc D W A R D. 
 
 fociable, that nobody dare avow it, and 
 Sir Robert endeavoured to conceal the fource 
 of his indefatigable grafping as much as 
 he could. He often declared, " that he 
 thought himfelf rich enough, and that on 
 his own perfonal account, he had not the 
 flighted wilh for more ; but that he confi- 
 dered it as an indifpenfible duty to provide 
 liberally for his children, that his fort 
 would foon marry, and probably have a 
 numerous family; he was anxious therefore 
 to fecure a provifion for them ; that hav- 
 ing himfelf received an ample fortune with 
 his wife, he owed it to her memory to 
 provide amply for all her defcendants ; that 
 thefe confiderations alone induced him to 
 continue the toil of bufmefs, and remain in 
 the fmoke of the city, at a time of life which 
 required eafe and retirement, and when 
 his mind had loft all relifh for additional 
 wealth." 
 
 Thofe and fimilar pretexts deceived no- 
 body; all Sir Robert Barnet's acquaintance 
 knew, that the fovereign paffion of his foul 
 was the love of money, in the indulgence 
 
 of
 
 EDWARD. -63 
 
 Df which he confidered himfelf, and himfelf 
 only; and as for his fon, and his fon's chil- 
 dren who were not yet born, he thought as 
 little of them in his exertions for wealth 
 as they did of him. 
 
 It is curious to obferve the various malks 
 under which men endeavour to conceal the- 
 odious features of permanent or increafing 
 avarice yet they impofe on none, but 
 thofe who ufe them : We are all fufficiently 
 fliarp-fighted to fee through the flimfy veils, 
 under which our neighbours endeavour to 
 hide what is unamiable in their difpofnions.; 
 yet we are weak enough to imagine, that the 
 fame piece of old tattered gauze, when 
 thrown over our own foibles, will be im- 
 pervious to the eyes of all mankind. 
 
 The favourite wi(h of Sir Robert's heart 
 had once been to increafe his fortune to a 
 plum, r" If I were worth a hundred thou- 
 fand pounds," faid he, " I fhould be fatis- 
 fied." When he had acquired this however, 
 he felt the fame ardent defire for two hun- 
 dred thoufand pounds that he formerly had 
 for one v for, thought he, " if I were once 
 * 4 worth
 
 64 E D W A R D. 
 
 worth two plums, I could foon make a 
 third." 
 
 A new fource of covetoufnefs and dif- 
 content fprung up in the mind of Sir Ro- 
 bert about this time. 
 
 Curtaj nefcio quid Temper abeft reJ. 
 
 An old friend of his, who let out in life 
 at the fame time with himfelf, but remained 
 in very confined circumftances feveral years 
 after Sir Robert was in affluence, returned 
 about this time from the Eaft Indies ; he 
 lived in great fplendor, and was reputed to 
 be worth above two hundred thoufand 
 pounds That a man, whom he had known 
 fo much poorer than himfelf, fhould in the 
 fpace of a few years acquire more money 
 than he had been able to do in the courfe of 
 many, was a reflection which deprived Sir 
 Robert of all fatisfacHon from the great 
 fortune he himfeif pofleffed, and imbittered 
 all his enjoyments. 
 
 " All this availeth me nothing," faid 
 Haman the favourite of Ahafuerus, " fo.long 
 as I fee Mordecai the Jew fitting at the 
 
 King's gate." 
 
 " My
 
 EDWARD. 6c 
 
 3 
 *' My .hundred thoufand pounds availeth 
 
 me nothing," thought Sir Robert Bamet, 
 " as long as this curfed old friend of mine 
 has double that fum." 
 
 ^_ _ -| A ff \ ' ' 
 
 Two hundred thoufand pounds at leaft, 
 and as much more as he could, was .Sir 
 Robert therefore bent upon acquiring, and 
 he fet about it as eagerly as he had done at 
 the beginning of life. His efforts were for 
 fome time fuccefsful, which redoubled his 
 ardour, in the midft of which, he made an 
 imprudent pufh, and, inftead of raifing his 
 fortune to two hundred thoufand pounds, it 
 was funk to ninety thoufand j a fum which 
 appeared downright poverty in his eyes. 
 
 Sir Robert Barnet's voyage through life 
 had hitherto been remarkably profperous ; 
 wary and cautious at the outfet, he had 
 carefully fhunned the rocks and quickfands 
 on which lefs prudent adventurers ftrike. 
 But when he feemed to enjoy a very fa- 
 vourable gale, he was unexpectedly driven 
 back by an adverfe guft to a greater diftance 
 from the port he aimed at than he had 
 been for feveral years. 
 
 VOL. i. F His
 
 66 EDWARD. 
 
 His mind xvas unable to fuftain the fhock 
 of fuch an unexpe&ed reverfe of fortune. 
 
 Had Sir Rpbert been lefs uniformly pro- 
 fperous, had fortune dealt her favours to 
 him with a more fparing ^and, had he been 
 more accuftomed to checks and reverfes, 
 it is probable that he would either have ob- 
 viated his prefent misfortune, or been able- 
 to fupport it with greater firmnefs. 
 
 The fame man who could not bear the 
 Jdea of being worth only ninety thoufand 
 pounds, becaufe he had once poflefTed above 
 one hundred thoufand pounds, would have 
 lived tolerably fatisfied, with twenty thou- 
 fand or much lefs, if he had never poflefled 
 more. The original caufe of Sir Robert's 
 dejection of fpirits therefore was, rather 
 that he had at one time acquired too much, 
 than that he was ever reduced to too little. 
 He never recovered his fpirits after this 
 accident, and died in a ihort time of what 
 was called a nervous fever.
 
 EDWARD. 67 
 
 CHAP. VHL 
 
 Sedulitas autem ftulte quern diiigit urget. HOR , 
 
 E old lady bore the death of Sir Robert 
 with the fame degree of real concern 
 that he had done that of his wife. George, 
 however, burft into tears when he was told 
 of his father's death, and feemed rather de- 
 jeded for fome days after it. Alarmed left 
 his health might fuffer, the old lady ufed 
 every means to comfort him and difpel his 
 affliction ; alluring him that the natural 
 tendency of grief was to injure the health 
 of the living, without being of any fervice 
 to the dead ; and that although he were to 
 grieve himfelf into a confumption, his father 
 would after all remain as dead as before. 
 Whether it was the force or novelty of this 
 argument that fupported him, certain it 
 is that George's health did not greatly 
 fuffer by his affliction, which diminished 
 liis appetite fo little, that a very fhort time 
 F 2 after
 
 68 ED W A R D. 
 
 after his father's death he had a fevere fit 
 of indigeftion from eating too plentifully of 
 turtle. 
 
 His grandmother imputed this indifpofi- 
 tion to a glafs of water which, with the rafh- 
 nefs natural to youth, fhe {aid he had drank 
 in the time of dinner. George himfelf ex- 
 prefled fome fufpicions againft the turtle ; 
 but the old lady vindicated the animal's 
 character -with all the ardour of affection, 
 afferting its innocence not only from her 
 own experience but on the authority of 
 Dr. Truffle, who thought it a great fup- 
 porter of the fyftem, and that no fup- 
 pofable quantity of that dim received into 
 the fiomach could prove mortal, of which 
 many refpedlable perfons of her acquaint- 
 ance, ftill alive, were fufficient evidence. 
 Whatever was the caufe of his diforder, 
 George was in fo much diftrefs, that Dr. 
 Truffle was fent for ; and had he not hap- 
 pened to be otherwife engaged, very pof- 
 fibly the hiftory of Mr. Barnet would 
 have terminated at this place. Whether 
 the reader would have confidered this as 
 a fortunate circumftance for himfelf, or 
 
 not,
 
 EDWARD. 6g 
 
 not, it certainly was lucky for George 
 that a phyfician of very different notions 
 from Dr. Truffle attended him ; his grand- 
 mother fhewing infinite concern for the 
 young man, and fuperintending the admi- 
 niftration of every remedy, without excep- 
 tion. But all her tendernefs could not make 
 her refrain from giving frequent hints that 
 he had brought it on himfelf by that im- 
 prudent draught of cold water; and the 
 wretched patient fuffered little lefs from 
 the teazing of the old lady, than from the 
 pain of his bowels. 
 
 The phyfician made his fecond vifit, while 
 this perfevering old woman was expatiat- 
 ing on the mifchievous effects of cold water, 
 and the wilfulnefs of thofe who ufe it. 
 " But here comes the doctor," cried fhe, 
 " he will confirm all I have been faying." 
 " Pray doctor," continued fhe, " is it not 
 highly imprudent to drink raw, cold, windy, 
 unwholefome liquors at dinner." 
 
 " I fhould think fo," replied the doftor, 
 " and at fupper equally fo." 
 
 p 3 "Do
 
 70 EDWARD. 
 
 " Do you hear that, ray dear," faid fTie^ 
 addreffing herfelf to George, who was too 
 uneafy at the moment to make any reply ? 
 Then turning to the phyfician,. fhe rejoined, 
 " and is it not moft dangerous to begin to 
 take fuch drinks before the ftomach is ha- 
 bituated to them." 
 
 " I fufpeft that moft people are rafh 
 enough to begin things before they arc 
 habituated to them," replied the doctor, 
 fin il ing. 
 
 tf Ay ! doftor, you may langh," faid the 
 old lady, " fmce you and your brethren 
 reap the benefit of thofe people's raflinefe 
 and folly : But is it not your ferious opinion 
 that cold, windy, pernicious liquors are 
 peculiarly improper for a young man like 
 my gracdfon r" 
 
 " I fliould think fuch liquors as you de- 
 fcribe improper for young, old, and middle- 
 aged, madam," faid ,the doctor. 
 
 " But efpeciaHy for men of fortune like my 
 grandfon," refumed the lady, " who have all 
 the comforts of life at command, and who be- 
 ing young may expect to enjoy them long. 
 Your poor beggarly people may do as they 
 
 pleafe.
 
 E t> \V A R IX 71 
 
 pleafe, for they have nothing to lofe ; but for 
 tmein my grandfon's circumftances to throw 
 away his life in fuch a manner is quite ;n- 
 excufable." 
 
 41 For when once his life is thrown away/' 
 added the doctor, " he will be reduced to 
 the fame circumftances with the poor." 
 
 *' Ah! fo we are told," faid throld lady 
 with a figh, " and a very hard thing it is.'* 
 " But do you not think that there may be 
 fome difference made," continued Ihe, "be- 
 tween the better fort of people and the in- 
 ferior orders after all, doctor ? for if they 
 are put exactly on the fame footing, the rich 
 will be more feverely dealt with." 
 
 " How fo?" faid the dodor. 
 
 " Becaufe," replied fne, " the poor have 
 always been accuftomed to hardfhips; and 
 ill ufage of any kind would be a much flight- 
 er punifhment to them, than to the rich, 
 \vho have been ufed to comforts all their 
 lives." 
 
 " That does make a difference," rejoined 
 
 the doctor, " and there will be a difference 
 
 after death alfo, madam ; for the rich will 
 
 have
 
 71 EDWARD. 
 
 have more magnificent funerals, and much 
 more comfortable graves." 
 
 " That, is but cold comfort," replied the 
 old lady with a forrowfulface : " But. you 
 hear what he has faid," continued fhe, turn- 
 ing to her grandfon, " and if you do not 
 profit by it, it is neither his fault nor mine." 
 " I neither blame him nor you," replied 
 George, with a look of anguim; " but I 
 muft beg that you will both leave the room 
 for a few minutes." 
 
 Mr. Barnet foon recovered from this com- 
 plaint ; and although in the courfe of his life 
 he had many attacks of the fame nature, he 
 never after could impute them to the fame 
 caufe, for he never ventured on another 
 glafs of unmixed water; but, by his grand- 
 mother's direction, always corrected the 
 raw and pernicious qualities, which fhe 
 thought belonged to that liquid, with fome 
 other of a warmer nature ; and he continued 
 to live with the old lady, in a very comfort- 
 able manner, to ufe a favourite phrafe of 
 hers, which afterwards became a noted one 
 of Mr. George's,
 
 E D \V A R D. 73 
 
 CHAP. IX. 
 
 A lazy, lolling fort, 
 
 Unfeen at church, at fenate, or at court, 
 
 Of ever little fs loit'rers, that attend 
 
 No caufe, no truft, no duty, and no friend. 
 
 POPE. 
 
 * LT HOUGH the thread of this old lady's 
 *^ life was of a very tough texture, and 
 although fhe endeavoured to fpin it out as 
 long as poffible, fhe could not prevent its 
 fnapping at laft. 
 
 By her laft will, fhe left her whole for- 
 tune to her grandfon ; notwithftanding this 
 circumftance, he was uneafy at her death. 
 George was more than moft men the flave 
 of habit; he felt fuch a blank on lofing the 
 old lady, as he, who was by no means fer- 
 tile in refources, was for fome time at a lofs 
 how to fupply. -Previous to the death of his 
 grandmother, he had loft fome of his ac- 
 quaintance ; but as their deaths made lefs 
 alteration in the routine of his own life, and 
 
 did
 
 74 E D W A R D. 
 
 did not interrupt the daily return of what 
 he called his comforts, he forgot them very 
 fpeedily: whereas now feveral things on 
 which he put importance were neglected, 
 or prefented to him in a lefs comfortable 
 ftyle than formerly, his grief for the old lady 
 was of courfe more poignant and durable 
 than any thing of the fame kind he had 
 ever felt before. At the diflance of two 
 complete months after (he had been, with 
 all due honours, interred, and when no idea 
 of her exifted in the memory of any other 
 perfon, Mr. George gave a linking proof 
 that a grateful recollection of her remained 
 in. his; for one day at his own table, on 
 tafting a difli of ftewed carp, he exclaimed 
 *' that the cook had fpoiled it;" adding in a 
 forrowful tone of voice* and with tears in 
 liis eyes, " If my 'worthy grandmother wtre 
 alive ^ I J):ould not be fo Jerked" 
 
 This oblervation, though directly lev elled 
 at the cook, glanced obliquely at his fifter 
 Catherine, who then fat at his table, and on 
 whom he had devolved the management of 
 his houfe after their grandmother's death. 
 l This
 
 EDWARD. 75 
 
 This young lady had been left but a. very 
 moderate fortune by her father; on his death,, 
 fhe went and boarded with a female rela- 
 tion. George, on the other hand^ had pre- 
 vailed on his grandmother, a confiderable 
 time before her death, to take an elegant 
 houfe in the weft end of the town, where 
 they lived for one half of the year^ and 
 fpent the other at her villa in the country ; 
 he now invited his filler to prefide over 
 both. 
 
 There are few things in which mankind 
 make greater miftakes than in the obje&a 
 in which they place their own happinefs, 
 and in their eftimate of the happinefs of 
 others. -Mifs Barnet was often confidered 
 as an unfortunate young woman, becaufe 
 her father left her a fmaHer portion than her 
 ought, and becaufe fhe was not a favourite 
 of her grandmother; yet there is no doubt 
 that fhe was by far the happieii in the Bar- 
 net family. Sir Robert was quoted as at 
 fortunate man, and envied by half the city 
 on account of his rapid accumulation of' 
 wealth; yet this, fo far from producing. 
 
 content.
 
 76 EDWARD. 
 
 content, only augmented covetoufnefs, made 
 him unable to fuftaiu the firft blow of ad- 
 verfity, and rendered him the vidim of de- 
 ipondency. And his fon George was con- 
 iidered as one of the luckieft fellows in 
 life, becaufe he fucceeded early to both his 
 father's and grandmother's fortunes, which, 
 in fact, were what bribed him into indo- 
 lence, and finally deprived him of all that 
 gives relifh to exiftence. To a mind like 
 that of George, devoid of ambition and cu- 
 riofity, the fpur of poverty was perhaps the 
 only thing which could have roufed him 
 into that degree of exertion that is necef- 
 fary to render a man at all refpettable in 
 the eyes of others, or tolerably happy 
 in himfelf. Obliged to do nothing, he ne- 
 ver knew what to do; he found it a diffi- 
 cult matter to get through the day; and as 
 this difficulty recurred every day, life on 
 the whole was rather an oppreffive bufmefs 
 to him. 
 
 In town, his only exercife was a lounge 
 
 in Bond-ftreet, or a ride in Hyde Park ; and 
 
 his only bufmefs drefling, for his ride, and 
 
 10 afterwards
 
 EDWARD. 77 
 
 afterwards for his dinner. At one time he 
 (hewed fome fondnefs for drefs, and it was 
 thought he would have become a fop, but 
 his natural and acquired indolence over- 
 came that kind of vanity, and the fatigue of 
 dreffing became unfupportable to him. The 
 happieft part of his life was that which fuc- 
 ceeded his ride, for 'he had then generally 
 an appetite, and was in the well-affured hope 
 of a good dinner ; but when he had quite 
 fubdued his appetite, having no tafte for 
 converfation no pieafure in reflection 
 no curiofity to gratify no ambition to ex- 
 cite him, if he did not fall afleep, tedium 
 returned, and exiftence became a burden ; 
 from which he was folhetimes tempted 
 to feek temporary relief in the moft per- 
 nicious of all palliatives, and was in danger 
 of gradually finking into a fot; from this 
 laft ftage of human degradation he was 
 faved by the vigilant exertions of his fifter, 
 who with infinite addrefs diverted him 
 from that kind of indulgence as often 
 as fhe faw him inclined to it ; and when 
 they dined alone, fhe either had com- 
 pany engaged early after dinner, or per- 
 
 fuaded
 
 78 EDWARD. 
 
 fuaded him to accompany her to Come of 
 the theatres, though he had little or no en^ 
 joyment at the playhoufe, unlefs when a 
 pantomime, or a play exceedingly like a 
 pantomime, was exhibited. He affected to 
 have a tafte for mufic, and went occafionally 
 to the Opera, where he was extremely apt to 
 indulge in a {lumber. Of all theatrical enter- 
 tainments, tumbling and rope-dancing af- 
 forded him the greateft pleafure, and he was 
 allowed to be a tolerable critic in both. 
 He always had a regular fupper, for al- 
 though he never had any appetite at that 
 meal, he loved to pick a bit, merely to pafs 
 away the time; and he went to bed from 
 a wearinefs of being awake, more than any 
 need of fleep. Such was Mr. George Bar- 
 net's life in town, and it was not a great 
 deal pleafanter in the country: he kept 
 hunters, it is true, but having an early pro- 
 penfity to corpulency he found hunting 
 by much too fatiguing an amufement; 
 cock-fighting and horfe-racing were more 
 to his tafte, becaufe in thele all the danger 
 and fatigue belonged to his horfes and 
 
 cocks;
 
 EDWARD. 79 
 
 cocks ; yet when the victories of the one or 
 the other were mentioned, George plumed 
 ^limfelf as much as if he had won them ia 
 perfon, like the general who arrogates to 
 hipfelf the praife of a fuccefsful attack 
 made, unknown to him, while he was at 
 Dinner four miles from the fcene of action.
 
 So E D W A R P. 
 
 C H A P. X. 
 
 Nee tarn veaeris quantum lludiofa culin;c. 
 
 HOR. 
 
 A s Mr. George Barnet's fifter was more 
 indulgent to his humours than any 
 body elfe, he liked her company better than 
 that of any other woman ; and he acknow- 
 ledged that he never found things fo com- 
 fortable when {he was abfent. So that he 
 often prevailed on her to accompany him 
 to hcrfe- races, and always to the watering- 
 places, to fome one or other of which he 
 went every feafon. 
 
 He himfelf ufed to exprefs furprife that 
 he mould have any return of this inclina- 
 tion ; " for I am no fooner at any one of 
 thefe watering-places," faid he, " than in 
 fpite of their balls, and concerts, and lot- 
 teries, I am fure to wifh myfelf at one 
 or other of my own fnug comfortable 
 houfes." 
 
 Indolence
 
 EDWARD. 81 
 
 Indolence increafing hourly, Mr. Barnet 
 renounced the delights of the watering 
 places, and determined to fpend his time 
 entirely at his own houfes; from which he 
 feldom went, except to a horfe-race ; for he 
 ftill adhered a little to the turf. He be- 
 came, however, every day more capricious, 
 peevifh, and querulous ; fo that it required 
 all that affection, which, in fpite of the op- 
 pofition of their characters, his filter really 
 had for him, to enable her to live with him. 
 fo long as fhe did ; and it is probable that 
 fhe would have loft patience, and quitted 
 him foon, even although the event I am 
 now about to mention had never taken 
 place. 
 
 Mr. Temple, a young clergyman, who 
 had a living at no great diftance from Mr. 
 Barnet's houfe in the country, paid his ad- 
 dreffestoMifs Catharine; and their marriage, 
 which in due time took place, furnifhedher 
 with a fair pretext for leaving her brother. 
 
 Mrs. Temple's moft intimate friend was 
 a young lady of the name of Lewis, with 
 whom fhe had formed an acquaintance at 
 
 VCH., i. G the
 
 82 EDWARD. 
 
 the boarding-fchool. Mifs Lewis was niece 
 to the miftrefs of the fchool, and daughter 
 of a clergyman in Wales, on whofe death 
 Mifs Lewis was invited by her aunt to live 
 with her, of which invitation, as the young 
 lady was an only child, and had loft her 
 mother previous to the death of her father, 
 me accepted. 
 
 Although Mr. Lewis at his death could 
 not bequeath to his daughter much of that 
 fpecies of wealth for which there is the 
 moft univerfal demand, he had been affi- 
 duous during his life, in conveying to her 
 another kind of wealth, in which he was 
 himfelf uncommonly opulent j he had from 
 her childhood enriched her mind with the 
 virtues of benevolence and refignntion ; 
 from nature me derived an excellent under- 
 flanding, and one of the happieft tempers 
 in the world. Mifs Lewis was about the 
 fame age with her friend, but fhe had made 
 greater advances in fome branches of know- 
 ledge ; and Mrs. Temple often mentioned 
 her to her hufband in terms equally affec- 
 tionate and refpeclful.
 
 EDWARD. 83 
 
 Mifs Lewis was invited to pafs a few 
 weeks with the new married couple, and 
 her company was fo agreeable to both, that 
 they never ceafed importuning the aunt, till 
 (he confented to allow her niece to fpend 
 the fummer with them; a permiflion which, 
 after a fhort vifit to the aunt, was extended 
 to the fucceeding autumn. Unable to live 
 in the country by himfelf, Mr. Barnet re- 
 moved to town earlier than ufual, and when 
 there, his moft agreeable refource was driv- 
 ing to Mr. Temple's refidence in the coun- 
 try. 
 
 The air of affection, content, and cheer- 
 fulnefs, that Mr. Barnet always found on the 
 face of his brother-in-law and fitter, form- 
 ed a ftrong contraft with the expreffion of 
 thofe countenances he left behind him in 
 town, as well as with his own fenfitioas. 
 
 Thcfe fenfations were rendered more dif- 
 agreeable, by fome very confiderabie lofTes 
 he met with on the turf. 
 
 Notwithflanding all the weaknefs of her 
 
 brother's character, Mrs. Temple had a 
 
 G 2 great
 
 84 EDWARD. 
 
 great affection for him, and a very warm 
 defire to promote his happinefs, which (he 
 imagined could not be fo effectually done by 
 any means as by his marriage with Mifs 
 Lewis j fhe had long had this plan in her 
 head, and often regretted that her brother 
 feemed to be little affected by the attractions 
 of her friend, who was a handfbme, as well 
 as a very accomplished woman. 
 
 When fhe heard of her brother's recent 
 loffes, fhe became more earned: than ever 
 for the accomplifhment of her plan; fhe 
 faw that his affairs would gradually go in- 
 to confufion, from the extreme indolence 
 of his temper; and dreaded that he might be 
 precipitated into more expeditious ruin by 
 gaming : fhe thought thofe evils would be 
 prevented, and her brother fecured in all 
 the happinefs of which he was fufceptible, 
 by his marriage with a woman of Mifs 
 Lewis's admirable good fenfe and prudence. 
 It muft be confeffed that Mrs. Temple on 
 this occafion fhewed more folicitude for 
 her brother's happinefs, than for her friend's; 
 but perhaps fhe had a more favourable opi- 
 nion 
 
 14
 
 EDWARD. 8 
 
 nion of his character than the reader en-- 
 terrains. 
 
 She imparted her fcheme to her hufband, 
 and prevailed on him to aflift her in the 
 accomplishing it. 
 
 The day after the hufband and wife had 
 formed this treaty Mr. Barnet, dined with 
 them ^there was a difli of ftewed carp on 
 the table, which Mrs, Temple had taken care 
 to have drefled exactly to her brother's 
 tafte ; he eat heartily of it, and commended 
 it very much. " Ah ! fifter," faid he, how 
 infinitely better drefled this is, than what we 
 once had at my table," referring to that for- 
 merly mentioned, which brought his de<- 
 ceafed grandmother fo pathetically to his 
 recollection. " I acknowledge it, brother," 
 replied Mrs.Temple,"and could, if I pleafed, 
 explain the reafon of it." She then turn- 
 ed to other fubje&s, addreffing her difcourfe 
 to Mifs Lewis. 
 
 This was a point of too much importance 
 
 with Mr. Barnet, as his fifter well knew, for 
 
 him to let flip without inveftigation. The 
 
 G 3 fame
 
 86 EDWARD.- 
 
 fame afternoon he put her in mind of her 
 promife, begging (he would inform him 
 how {he came by fo important an improve- 
 ment. 
 
 " Really, brother," anfwered {he," I muft 
 confefs that I am obliged to Mifs Lewis for 
 the greateft improvements I ever made." 
 
 " Say you fo ?" cried Barnet, with furprife; 
 " I had no idea that (he had fo good a no~ 
 tion of cookery." 
 
 < There are very few things of import- 
 ance of which {he has not a good notion," 
 refumed Mrs. Temple. " Mifs Lewis is cer- 
 tainly a very accomplifhed woman," added 
 her hufband. 
 
 " She muft be an accompliftied woman 
 indeed" faid Baniet; " it was without ex- 
 ception a dih of the beft ftewed carp I ever 
 tafted." 
 
 Mrs. Temple obferved with fatisfadtion, 
 after this converfation, " that her brother 
 paid much more attention to Mifs Lewis 
 than he had ever done before." 
 
 13 Having
 
 EDWARD. 87 
 
 Having a mare to run at Epfom, he 
 thought himfelf obliged to attend the races 
 there ; but he feemed to leave Mr. Temple's 
 with regret, and acknowledged that, " were 
 he to indulge his own tafte, he would rather 
 have ftaid."
 
 88 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XL 
 
 L' orgueil a plus de part que la bonte aux remontrances 
 que nous faifons a ceux qui commettent des fautes. 
 
 ROCHEFOUCAULT. 
 
 TT7HEN the races were over, Mr. Barnet 
 returned to the hotife of his brother- 
 in-law, with Mr. Wormwood, whom 
 he had met at Epfom. This gentleman 
 was his near relation, a batchelor, who fol- 
 lowed no profeffion, but lived on the in- 
 tereft of his money, which produced a mo- 
 derate annual fum, that he had no great de- 
 fire of increalmg. He was one of thofe 
 men who are apt to give their advice before 
 it is afked, and who teftify their good will 
 to their friends, by informing them of their 
 failings. Mr. Wormwood was a man of 
 knowledge and fenfe, but as he imagined 
 that he poflefled a greater ihare of both 
 than he did in reality, and was of a fatirical 
 
 turn,
 
 EDWARD. 89 
 
 turn, the liberality with which he beftowed 
 advice was thought to proceed fully as much 
 from pride, or indulgence of his own vein, 
 as from benevolence. He had made a large 
 collection of prudential maxims refpecting 
 the conduct of life, in the ufe of which he 
 could not be accufed of felnfhnefs, as he dif- 
 tributed them freely among his friends and 
 acquaintance, without deriving much benefit 
 from them himfelf. A man of this charac- 
 ter, it will readily be believed, frequently 
 difobliged thofe he affected to ferve, and 
 fometimes loft the friend he intended to 
 warn. 
 
 Mr. Barnet had a partiality, however, for 
 his coufm Wormwood, arid at this par- 
 ticular time that partiality was ftronger in 
 his favour than ufual, for a favourite mare 
 of Mr. Barnet^having been diftanced at the 
 races, by which he loft a confiderable fum, 
 and was in very bad humour ; but as the 
 owner of the victorious hone was a man 
 of whom Mr f Wormwood had an ill opi- 
 nion, he had gratified his friend by abufing 
 
 this
 
 90 E D W A R D. 
 
 this man all the way as they returned to- 
 gether from Epfom. 
 
 Mr. Barnet and Wormwood pafled fome 
 days at Mr. Temple's ; during this time the 
 former paid unufual attention to Mifs Lewis, 
 and fometimes fpoke in her praife to Mr. 
 Wormwood. This did not efcape Mr. Worm- 
 wood's obfervation. While they walked to- 
 gether one day in the garden, Barnet men- 
 tioned Mifs Lewis two or three times, and 
 once he feemed to hefitate, and appeared 
 embarrafled, like one who has fomething on 
 his mind that he does not know how to 
 communicate. 
 
 To fave him farther trouble or circumlo- 
 cution, Wormwood faid, " I have a great 
 notion you wim to tell me that you are in 
 love with Mifs Lewis." 
 
 ** I don't know," faid Mr. Barnet, after 
 a look of furprize, " how you came by that 
 notion, but I confefs I have a great refpeft 
 for the lady." 
 
 <{ Yes, yes, no doubt, you have an amaz- 
 ing deal of refpect for her. I dare be 
 fworn you think ib," faid Wormwood. 
 
 "If I
 
 EDWARD. 91 
 
 " If I think fo, it muft be bccaufe it is fo," 
 rejoined Bar net. 
 
 " I am not quite fo certain of that," faid 
 Wormwood ; " did you never take a fancy 
 into your head that was without founda- 
 tion ?" 
 
 " Not fuch a fancy as this ; no man can 
 imagine he is fond of a woman, unlefs he be 
 fond of her." 
 
 44 There you are quite miftaken, my good 
 friend j but it is a very common miftake : I 
 have known men, -who, from a traniient 
 glow, a mere freak, have imagined them- 
 felves in love with women, whom on re- 
 flection they hated, as they found to be the 
 cafe immediately after marrying them." 
 
 " I know nothing of your freaks or fud- 
 den glows," foid Barnet, " but I have a fin- 
 cere and well-founded efteem. for Mifs 
 Lewis." 
 
 44 A fincere and well-founded efteem !" 
 repeated Wormwood, with a fneering ac- 
 cent. 
 
 44 Yes, to be fure, I have," faid Barnet, 
 angrily. 
 
 " Lord !
 
 92 EDWARD. 
 
 " Lord ! Lord ! what fhort-fighted ani- 
 mals men are !" 
 
 " What do you mean ?" 
 
 " I mean," anfwered Wormwood, " that 
 it is a very common thing for good-na- 
 tured men to be miftaken," replied Worm- 
 wood. 
 
 " Ay, and for ill-natured men alfo, let me 
 tell you that," rejoined Barnet. 
 
 " You are right, my good friend," faid 
 Wormwood, " Men of all defcriptions are 
 liable to miftake.s j but the greateft of all mif- 
 takes is, for a plain worthy man to fancy 
 he is in love, when he is no fuch thing." 
 
 " May not a plain worthy man be iu love 
 as well as another ?" Barnet afked. 
 
 " Not all plain worthy men," anfwered 
 Wormwood. 
 
 " Why not ?" 
 
 " Becaufe fome very plain worthy men 
 are not fufceptible of the paffion ; and you, 
 my good friend, are of the number. 
 
 " Not fufceptible of love !" repeated Bar- 
 net. 
 
 "Not
 
 EDWARD. 93 
 
 " Not of the kind of love now in quef- 
 tion," replied Wormwood, with the utmoft 
 gravity. " I well know, my worthy friend, 
 that there is another fpecies of the fame 
 paffion to which you have very great fuf- 
 ceptibility ; indeed no man, I will venture to 
 affirm, was ever more in love with ftewed 
 carp ; or could ihew more partiality to turtle, 
 or to venifon when in feafon for as the 
 wife man fays, and as I have often heard 
 you repeat, there is a feafon for every 
 thing; for venifon and turtle, as well as 
 for green peafe and oyfters : but our love 
 for fuch objeds, however amiable in them- 
 felves, is of a different nature from what we 
 have for the fair fex and believe me, my 
 dear Barnet, this whim which you have 
 taken up about Mifs Lewis, amounts to no- 
 thing like the paffion of love properly fo 
 fo called." 
 
 " You think not?" faid Barnet. 
 
 " I am fure of it," replied Wormwood, 
 * c and befides, if you were as much in love 
 as you imagine, and could perfuade the lady 
 to become your wife, it would be as un- 
 lucky for her as for you." 
 
 Why
 
 94 EDWARD. 
 
 " Why do you think fo ?" faid Earner. 
 
 " Becaufe you are not fuited to each 
 other your characters are oppofite." 
 
 " In what refpeft ?" 
 
 " In ail refpe&s; yourtaftes are quite dif- 
 ferent: the lady, I underftand, loves reading ; 
 flie feems to be a woman of reflection ; it is 
 well known that you hate every thing of 
 that kind. Befides, Mifs Lewis is a woman 
 
 of a very clear underftanding ." 
 
 " Well, what then?" cried Barnet, in a rage. 
 
 " O ! I aik your pardon, 7 ' replied Worm- 
 wood, recollecting himfelf; "I did not mean 
 any thing ofFenfive, quite the contrary ; 
 your underftanding is in fome things clear 
 alfo ; but neverthelefs your underftanding is 
 very different from hers, and they never 
 wonld blend together." 
 
 " You really think fo ?" faid Barnet. 
 
 " Really and truly," anfwered the other; 
 " for, independent of the oppofition in your 
 taftes in general, you cannot but be fenfiWe 
 that you have a thoufand little whims and 
 peculiarities, which your fervants are obliged 
 to iubmit to, and which your fifter was fo 
 obliging as to bear, yet no woman of 
 
 fenfe
 
 EDWARD. 95- 
 
 fenfe and fpirit could endure ; and none but 
 a. fincere friend like me would inform you 
 of." 
 
 " I am greatly obliged to you," faid Bar- 
 net, bowing very low. 
 
 " You will be obliged to me, if what I 
 have urged convinces you of your miftake 
 as to being in love; and make you refolve 
 never to think of a wife, but to die an old 
 batchelor." 
 
 " An old batchelor ! I'll be damned be- 
 fore I die an old batchelor," cried Barnet 
 with indignation. 
 
 " I am of a different opinion," anfwered 
 Wormwood, with coolnefs ; " I imagine 
 you will die an old batchelor before you are 
 damned." 
 
 " I deteft old batchelors," refumed Barnet. 
 " That curfed fellow, whofe horfe dif- 
 tanced my mare, is a very old batchelor; 
 damn him, and his horfe alfo," 
 
 " Let us preferve reafon in our rage, my 
 worthy friend," faid Wormwood ; " inftead 
 of damning the horfe, if you follow my 
 advice, you'll purchafe him ; and as for the 
 
 man,
 
 96 EDWARD. 
 
 man, you may truft that bufmefs to himfelf; 
 but although you fliould hate him, pray 
 hate him for fomething elfe, and not for 
 being of a clafs to which you yourfelf will 
 belong." 
 
 " Never, never," cried Barnet. 
 
 " Well, I am convinced it will be fo, and 
 that this whim of your being fond of Mifs 
 Lewis will foon pafs away; at any rate I 
 have performed the duty of a relation and 
 friend.'* So faying, Mr. Wormwood went 
 into the houfe, leaving Mr. Barnet in the 
 garden.
 
 EDWARD. 97 
 
 CHAP. XII. 
 
 Je veux une femme indulgent?, 
 
 Dont la beaute douce et compatiffante, 
 
 A mes defauts facile a fe plier, 
 
 Daigne avec moi me reconcilier, 
 
 Me corriger, fans prendre un ton cauftique. 
 
 Me gouverner, fans etre tyrannique, 
 
 Et dans mon coeur penetrer pas a pas 
 
 Comme un jour doux dans des yeux delicats. 
 
 VOLTAIRE. 
 
 n TTR. and Mrs. Temple were walking on 
 **- the other fide of a hedge in the gar- 
 den, and had overheard the dialogue be- 
 tween Barnet and Wormwood; when it 
 ceafed, they turned, and joined the former. 
 
 Mr. Temple had frequently obferved the 
 effecT: of contradiction, on the irritable mind 
 of Barnet; and it inftantly occurred to him 
 that this capricious difpofition might be 
 made ufeful, in promoting the fcheme which 
 Mrs. Temple and he had i n view. 
 
 " That wife gentleman," faid Barnet, 
 pointing after Wormwood, as Mr. and 
 
 VOL. I. H
 
 9$ E D \V A R D.- 
 
 Mrs. Temple joined him ; " that wife and 
 penetrating gentleman, has taken it into 
 his head that I fhall be an old bachelor. 
 
 " I do moft fmcerely hope fo," faid Mr. 
 Temple. 
 
 " Why fo?" faid Earner. 
 
 " Becaufe if you do not live to be an old 
 bachelor, you mud die very foon," an- 
 fwered Mr. Temple. 
 
 " I fhould be glad to know what is to 
 hinder me from marrying to-morrow, if I 
 pleafe," faid Barnet. 
 
 " You never will pleafe , brother, take my 
 word for it;" replied Mr. Temple. 
 
 " How are you fo certain of that, Sir ?" 
 cried Barnet. 
 
 " Why truly, brother," replied Mr. Tem- 
 ple, " there are fome things which one is 
 quite convinced of, without being able to 
 give a reafon for fo being." 
 
 " Quite convinced !" cried Earner; 
 
 " Yes truly, I may fay quite convinced," 
 refumed Mr. Temple; " yet I might be at 
 a lofs to tell precifely why: But all your 
 ways are the ways of a bachelor; the ge- 
 neral
 
 EDWARD. 99 
 
 neral expreffion of your countenance indi- 
 cates, I don't know how, that you never 
 wall have the courage to marry ; your drefs 
 alfo and manner of walking are all in the 
 ftyle of an old bachelor. 
 
 Barnet flared in Temple's face, which 
 retained its gravity with admirable fteadi- 
 nefs j he then looked at his own legs, and 
 turning fuddenly to Mrs. Temple, he faid, 
 " Pray fifter do you perceive any thing in 
 my face, drefs, or manner of walking, that 
 gives me the air of an old bachelor ?" 
 
 " Why, brother," anfwered fhe, " you are 
 too young to have the air of a very old 
 bachelor; but I mud corifefs I have feen 
 fome very old bachelors who had much 
 of your air and manner." 
 
 "O! you have," cried Barnet; "and 
 from which you conclude, no doubt, that I 
 ihall be a bachelor all my life." 
 
 " I own, brother," Mrs. Temple anfwered, 
 " that I think there is a probability that 
 you will die before you marry, but I do 
 fmcerely hope you will live to be an old 
 unmarried man." 
 
 H 2 That
 
 joo E D W A R D. 
 
 *' That you hope I fhall remain all my 
 life unmarried, fitter," refumed Barnet 
 \vith anger," I make no manner of doubt-; 
 but perhaps you may find yourfelf rnif- 
 taken, and fooner than you think of, let 
 me tell you that" 
 
 " Although that be your opinion, my 
 dear brother, and the other mine," replied 
 Mrs. Temple with meeknefs, " why fhould 
 this put you in a paflion ?" 
 
 " In a paflion," exclaimed Barnet furi- 
 oufly ; " who the devil is in a paflion:" 
 
 " What puts it into your head, my dear, 
 that your brother is in a paflion ? don't you 
 fee he is quite cool?" faid Mr. Temple, 
 addrefling his wife. 
 
 To prove his coolnefs, Barnet began to 
 hum a tune: and then wheeled abruptly 
 from them and went into the houfe, and 
 left Mr. and Mrs. Temple to continue their 
 walk. 
 
 Mr. Barnet found Mifs Lewis alone, and 
 
 the anger with which he was kindled in- 
 
 fpiring him with courage, he directly made 
 
 her a propofal of marriage in a more ani- 
 
 6 mated
 
 EDWARD. 101 
 
 mated manner, and with a better grace, than 
 if he had been in his natural ftate. 
 
 As nothing could be lefs expected, Mifs 
 Le\vis was thrown into fome confufiori, and 
 did not give fo decided and peremptory a 
 refufal as other wife fhe would have done. 
 Barnet preffed his fuit in a more manly 
 ftile than he had ever before ufed. 
 
 The courtfhip was interrupted by the 
 coming of company. 
 
 The fame evening Mifs Lewis informed 
 her friend of her brother's propofal, at 
 which Mrs. Temple exprefled the greateft 
 fatisfaclion, combating Mifs Lewis's objec- 
 tions with a zeal infpired by the affection 
 fhe bore her brother. 
 
 Mifs Lewis long withftood the importu- 
 nities of her friend and the continued ad- 
 dreifes of Mr. Barnet, which became every 
 day more ardent by the provoking infmu- 
 ations of Wormwood : At laft, however, 
 {he *was prevailed on to give him her hand 
 in marriage, to the great joy of Mr. and 
 Mrs. Temple ; and Barnet had the double 
 fatisfaction of overcoming the lady's re- 
 H 3 fiftance,
 
 102 E D W A R D. 
 
 fiftance, and confuting the afiertions of his 
 friends. 
 
 Mr. Barnet derived a degree of refpect 
 and importance in the world, from his 
 marriage with a woman of Mifs Lewis's 
 good fenfe and agreeable manners, which 
 his own character never would have pro* 
 cured. 
 
 With infinite addrefs, me gradually wean- 
 ed him from horfe-racing, cock-fighting, 
 every kind of gaming, and fome other 
 fources of expence, not only luperfluous 
 but alfo difreptitable. Her chief art con- 
 fifted in everlafting good humour, and in 
 rendering home fo comfortable and cheerful, 
 that he loft all inclination to be elfewhere, 
 and preferred domeftic fociety to thofe ruin- 
 ous habits into which he had been led, 
 His greateft enjoyment, however, was a 
 good dinner, drefled exactly to his tafte, 
 and a certain quantity of port wine after 
 it ; if any accident difturbed the regular re- 
 turn of this meal, or the accuracy of his 
 cookery, a misfortune of that magnitude 
 baffled all the foothings of his wife; nothing 
 
 but
 
 E D W A R D. 103 
 
 but the lenient hand of time, and a moft 
 unexceptionable dinner the following day, 
 could bring him again into tolerable tem- 
 per: Mrs. Barnet therefore found that a 
 good cook was the mod powerful auxiliary 
 {he could have, in her grand object of pro- 
 moting the happinefs of her hufband; and 
 fhe fpared no labour or expence, until (he 
 engaged one more to his tafte than any he 
 had ever employed before. In the ar- 
 ticle of drink her taik was much eafier; 
 for he drank nothing but mild ale with his 
 victuals, and port wine after dinner; the 
 latter he preferred to the French wines, 
 which he aflerted were all of too light and 
 too frivolous a nature, to agree with an 
 English ftomach; adding, in a common 
 phraie of his, " this (lands to reafon." 
 
 To make her hufband in reality a man 
 of fenfe or benevolence, was not in Mrs. 
 Barnet's power; but fhe managed matters 
 fo as to make him frequently appear fuch: 
 he was vifited by the moft refpectable peo- 
 ple in the county, ceconomy was combined 
 with hofpitality in his family, and he has 
 H 4 been
 
 104 E D W A R D. 
 
 been heard to declare, that upon the whole 
 he lived as Comfortably with his wife as he 
 had done with his grandmother. 
 
 Having prevailed in the great point of 
 turning her hufband from habits which 
 led to certain ruin, Mrs. Barnet was cau- 
 tious of interfering with his taftes or whims 
 of a lefs important nature. As Barnet was 
 a man who acted on all occafions from 
 humour, it was in the power of thofe around 
 him, to lead him or provoke him into any 
 meafure they pleafed ; and as nobody was 
 fo much with him as his wife, fhe might 
 have managed him in all refpecls, had fhe 
 thought it proper or becoming : Yet Mr. 
 Barnet was fo little fenfible of this, that he 
 valued himfelf on the fteadinefs of his cha- 
 racter, in following his own ideas, and never 
 being influenced by thofe of others-; but 
 of all weaknefles, he faid, the greateft was, 
 that of being biafled by women; and he 
 cxprefled the utmoft contempt for thofe 
 hufbands who are under petticoat govern- 
 ment, hinting fometimes," that this was the 
 cafe with his brother-in-law j but that as 
 
 for
 
 EDWARD. 105 
 
 for himfelf, he was determined, riotwith- 
 ilanding the regard he had for his wife, 
 never to permit her to meddle in any con- 
 cern above her natural fphere and capa- 
 city." 
 
 The truth was, Mrs. Temple had too high 
 an opinion of her hufband, to attempt to 
 govern him in any thing; and Mrs. Barnet, 
 who had no defire of governing, never in- 
 terfered unlefs when the object was of great 
 importance. 
 
 The paffive difpofition of Mrs. Barnet in 
 this particular, was not approved of by her 
 friend Mrs. Temple, who imagined, that by 
 a little more exertion, the former might 
 have turned her hufband from fome very 
 ill-ad vifed projects, and this was fome- 
 times a fource of difpute between the two 
 friends. 
 
 Several years after Mr. Barnet's marriage, 
 and immediately after the parim boy was 
 brought to his houfe, Mrs. Temple blamed 
 her friend with more warmth th^n ufual, 
 for not endeavouring to put a flop to a 
 
 project
 
 io6 EDWARD. 
 
 projed of a ridiculous nature, in which 
 Barnet had engaged with uncommon eager- 
 nefs; and fhe concluded her remonftrance, 
 by declaring, that fhe Ihould confider Mrs. 
 Barnet as the promoter of all the fooliih 
 projects, from which fhe did not at leaft 
 endeavour to divert her hufband. 
 
 " How am I certain that it is in my 
 power to divert him from them?" faid Mrs. 
 Barnet; "perhaps the very attempt might 
 make him, more eager to purfue them, and 
 unqueftionably would in the firft place pro- 
 duce a difpute, and difputes are things I 
 always ftrive to avoid, particularly with my 
 hufband; having often obferved that they 
 are the fources of ill humour between mar- 
 ried people, and fdmetimes of difgufl and 
 hatred. How do I know what degree of 
 enjoyment he derives from thofe fchemes 
 which you think whimfical? and were I to 
 fucceed in diverting him from them, am I 
 certain of fubftituting others which to him, 
 framed and conftituted as his mind is, will 
 afford him equal fatisfadion or amufement ? 
 I am not, my dear friend,", continued 
 
 Mrs.
 
 EDWARD. 107 
 
 Mrs. Barnet, " to make my particular tafte 
 or turn of thought the rule of his ; he has 
 a right to follow the dictates of his own 
 fancy, when it prompts him to nothing 
 criminal or hurtful to others." 
 
 " But this ftrange whim that he has 
 taken about the houfe^ will be hurtful to 
 you, my dear, and to your daughter," re- 
 plied Mrs. Temple ; " he has already thrown 
 away a confiderable fum of money on it, 
 and will, if you do not interfere, throw 
 away more every year." 
 
 " You forget, my friend," faid Mrs. 
 Barnet, " that I brought no fortune to 
 your brother; am I to attempt to con- 
 trol him in the ufe he makes of his 
 own r" 
 
 " Yes, certainly you are," anfwered Mrs. 
 Temple ; " and if you remain paffive any 
 longer, in my opinion you neglect what 
 you owe to yourfelf, to your child, and even 
 to your hufband." 
 
 But to underftand the drift of this con- 
 verfation, it will be requifite to mention 
 $vhat had pafled previous to it.
 
 io8 E D W A R D. 
 
 CHAP. XIII. 
 
 In nova fert animus mutatas dicere formas 
 
 Corpora. Ovio. 
 
 A CERTAIN houfe carpenter, whofe ufual 
 refidence was at London, occafionally 
 vifited a relation who refided in the village 
 near which Mr. Barnet's houfe flood: 
 This carpenter happened to make a pur- 
 chafe of an agreeable piece of ground, on 
 which he built a houfe, which he afterwards 
 fold to very great advantage. 
 
 When Mr. Barnet heard of this, he felt 
 fome uneafmefs at the thought of fo much 
 of his money remaining at a moderate in- 
 tereft in the funds, when it might be fo 
 much more advantageoufly employed, and 
 he determined to follow the carpenter's 
 example ; for this purpofe he alfo bought 
 a piece of ground, and procured the plan 
 of a howfe, more than double the fize of 
 the carpenter's, by the fale of which, ac- 
 cording
 
 EDWARD. 109 
 
 cording to his own calculation, he expected 
 to gain twice as much as the carpenter 
 had done; or by letting it at what he 
 thought a reafonable rent, he imagined he 
 could not fail to make much more of his 
 money than he received in the funds. 
 
 Barnet had been ftimulated to this un- 
 dertaking by the tranfient fuggeftions of ava- 
 rice, on hearing the great profits of the car- 
 penter mentioned in feveral companies in, 
 the .neighbourhood ; and this new fancy was 
 kept alive by the pleafure he took in mewing 
 the plan, explaining the beauties and con- 
 veniences of the houfe he intended to build ; 
 but as the carpenter's profits grew lefs arid 
 lefs the fubjecl: of converfation, and as Bar^ 
 net's pleafure in difplaying his plan began 
 alfo to diminim, it is very probable that his 
 natural indolence would have prevented 
 him from carrying his project farther, had 
 he not been ftimulated anew, and his almoft 
 blunted purpofe keenly whetted by the inter- 
 ference of his friend Mr. Wormwood. 
 
 This gentleman happening to pay Mr. 
 Barnet a vifit, difapproved of the plan of 
 
 his
 
 no E D W A R D. 
 
 his houfe, aflured him, that the carpenter's 
 profits had been exaggerated ; and advifed 
 him to relinquim a fcheme which would in- 
 jure his fortune, and at the fame time re- 
 der him ridiculous. 
 
 Barnet was fo much {hocked at hearing 
 a project, on which he valued himfelf not 
 a little, treated in this manner, that he was 
 unable to fpeak, and before he could reco- 
 ver himfelf, Wormwood added, " I fhould 
 be heartily concerned, my good friend, to 
 think that fuch a foolifh and expenfive 
 project was ever to be executed ; but I rely 
 on your ufual indecifion and ficklenefs, that 
 it never will." 
 
 This fpeech clinched the bufmefs; Bar- 
 net fent for the architect, agreed to his 
 terms, and the houfe was raifed with won- 
 derful expedition. 
 
 But after the houfe was completely finilh- 
 cd, and the ground belonging to it neatly 
 dreffed, to Mr. Barnet's aftonimment nei- 
 ther purchafor nor tenant appeared ; when 
 it had remained in this neglected condition 
 for twelve months, " did I not tell you," 
 
 faid
 
 E D \V A R D. iix 
 
 faid Mr. Wormwood to his friend Barnet, 
 " that this would be the cafe ? now you find, 
 when it is too late, that you have already 
 loft a whole year's intereft of your money." 
 
 " I mall not lofe a fmgle farthing," re- 
 plied Barnet ; " for I intend to add the in- 
 tereft of the money I have expended to 
 the price fixed laft year; and I will not 
 part with the premifes for a milling lefs, 
 no, not to my fifcer." 
 
 The houfe flood empty another year 
 nobody offering near the fum he had fixed 
 upon as the loweft price for it. 
 
 " The bidders for this villa of yours, are 
 very backward at coming forward," faid 
 Mr. Wormwood. 
 
 " They mall gain nothing however by 
 their dilatorineis," replied Barnet ; " for I 
 now mail infift on two years intereft being 
 added to the original price; and if they 
 provoke me by much longer delay, I will 
 add the inter ejl of the intereft" 
 
 This threat, inftead of making people hur- 
 ry to the purchafe, as Mr. Barnet expected, 
 1 4 feemed
 
 112 E D W A R D. 
 
 fcemec! rather to intimidate them, he neve? 
 had a fmgle offer after. 
 
 Finding this to be the cafe, Mr. Barnet 
 refolved to make fuch improvements as 
 he imagined could not fail to pleafe people 
 of tafte; and render this villa more mar- 
 ketable. 
 
 He began by forming an oval pond, be- 
 tween the front of his houfe and the river; 
 this pond he (locked with carp and tench, 
 and bought a couple of fvvans to fwim in 
 it; he built a wooden room amidft the 
 branches of a large beech, which flood in 
 a hollow behind the houfe, and made a 
 very neat flaircafe up to this airy apartment, 
 on the front of which was infcribed in 
 letters of gold The Belvtdere. He befpoke 
 two fphinxes of the beft free-ftone to be 
 placed on a couple of pillars, on each fide 
 of the gate ; the fculptor happening to have 
 a lion and an unicorn ready made, which 
 had laid long on his hands, endeavoured to 
 perfuade Mr. Barnet to take them inftead 
 of the~fph.inxes. 
 
 Mr.
 
 EDWARD. 113 
 
 Mr. Barnet at firft feemed to relifli the 
 propofal, until it was fuggefted to him by 
 his friend the innkeeper, that as he was 
 attached to the party at that time in op- 
 pofition, his friends might imagine, that 
 erecting thefe two old fupporters of the 
 crown at his gate, had the air of relinquifh- 
 ing his party. Mr. Barnet was fo ftriick 
 with the force of this, that he rejected 
 the fculptor's propofal, and infilled on his 
 own. 
 
 The fculptor finding htm pofitive fell to 
 work, and did his utmoft to metamorphofe 
 the lion and unicorn into acoupleoffphinxes; 
 and it was under this new denomina- 
 tion, that they were placed as centinels 
 at the gate of Mr. Barnet's new edifice; 
 yet it muft be acknowledged that they 
 ftill retained a caft of their original charac- 
 ters. 
 
 It was with a view to put an end to 
 
 fuch expenfive and ridiculous projects, and 
 
 prevent any farther attempt to improve 
 
 this houfe, that Mrs. Temple began the ex- 
 
 VOL, I. 1 poftulatioa
 
 ii 4 EDWARD. 
 
 poftulation above mentioned with her friend: 
 but Mrs. Barnet had fo great an averfion to 
 arguing with her hufband, or any thing which 
 might be considered as croffing his inclina- 
 tion, or difturbing his amufements, that fhc 
 would not promiie to interfere directly nor 
 indirectly in the bufinef* to which her friend 
 prompted her. At length a thought ftriking 
 her, " HI tell you what I am willing to do," 
 faid {he to Mrs. Temple ; " and if you will 
 aflift me, my dear, there is reafon to believe 
 we ftiall fucceed, and it will have nearly the 
 fame effect with your plan. I will propofe 
 to my huibarid, that we ourfelves fhould re- 
 move to this new houfe; we {hall then 
 have it in our power to fell or let that in 
 which we refide at prefent; for this we 
 fhall foon find either a purchafer or tenant 
 at a greater price or rent than my hufband 
 afks for the other." 
 
 " But how will you be able to bear the 
 pond and the belvidere, and above all, thofe 
 two odious monfters at the gate?" faid Mrs. 
 Temple. 
 
 " I fliall
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 " I fhall bear the fight of all thefe with 
 very little difturbance, my dear," anfwered 
 Mrs. Barnet ; " and much better than I 
 fliould bear the idea of plaguing my huf- 
 band, by croffing him in things from which 
 he feems to derive enjoyment. Truly, my 
 good friend," added (he, " if we begin to 
 turn into ridicule every amufement of our 
 neighbours, that is not, ftriclly fpeaking, 
 ufeful, and for which we ourfelves have no 
 relifh, we mail be in danger of deftroying 
 the quiet of domeftic life, and producing 
 an evil much greater than that againft 
 which we direct our fatire. Befides, Mr. 
 Barnet has lately difplayed fo much good- 
 nefs of heart, on a particular occafion, 
 as more than compenfates for the little 
 whims we have been fpeaking of." Mrs. 
 Barnet then gave fuch an account of the 
 adventure of the poor boy, as was highly 
 honourable to her hufband, to whom Ihe 
 afligned the whole merit. 
 
 This converfation happened only a few 
 
 hours after Mrs. Barnet had prevailed on her 
 
 hufband to take the boy. Mrs. Temple no 
 
 I 2 longer
 
 n6 EDWARD. 
 
 longer oppofed her friend's plan of removing 
 ro the new houfe, and felling that in which 
 jQie lived : but it was not neceflary to put this 
 plan in execution; for the very next day a 
 young mulatto, whofe father had left him 
 t confiderable fortune in one of our Weft 
 India iHands, happening to drive his phae- 
 fon through the village near which this 
 curious fabric ftood, one of his horfes loft 
 a fhoe, which obliged him to flop until it 
 *,vas replaced. He was accompanied by 
 a lady of the town, whom he kept ; and as 
 be was then in fearch of a country houfe, 
 he and his companion walked to take a 
 view of that which we have been fpeaking 
 of. The lady declared it to be one of the 
 moft tafly things of the kind fhe had ever 
 feen, and the young gentleman was in rap- 
 tures with the room in the beech tree ; they 
 both were delighted with the fphinxes; 
 one of them, in particular, fixed the atten- 
 tion of a negro footman who attended 
 them. " You feem to admire that creature 
 greatly, Pompey," faid the Lady to the 
 footman. 
 
 5 " Yes,
 
 EDWARD. 117 
 
 " Yes, madam,! admire her very muchj" 
 replied he ; " and mafia fhould admire her 
 more." 
 
 "How for" faid the lady. 
 
 " Becaufe," replied the footman, " fhe 
 is very like mafia's mother, and if fhe were 
 made of black ftone inftead of ivbite t her 
 face would be quite almcil the fame." 
 
 The young gentleman feemed a little out 
 of countenance at this remark, and it was 
 fortunate for Pompey that he was in Eng- 
 land, and not in the Weft Indies, when he 
 made it. 
 
 However, it did not fo far difguft the 
 mulatto as to prevent him from purchafmg 
 a houfe, which in all other refpedts was 
 fo much to his tafte. He agreed at once 
 to Mr. Barnet's demand, fent an upholftercr 
 from London to furnifli the houfe, and 
 came foon after with his miftrefs to inhabit 
 it. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet would have brought the 
 
 poor boy home immediately after fhe had 
 
 i 3 prevailed
 
 ii8 EDWARD. 
 
 prevailed on her hufband to admit hire; 
 but an order from the parifh officers, who 
 had placed him with the old woman, was 
 neceflary, before he could be taken from 
 her. When Mr. Barnet underfbod this, he 
 highly obliged and furprifed his wife, by 
 declaring, that as he was under the neceflity 
 of going to town within a few days on 
 bufmefs, he would take that opportunity of 
 informing the parifti officers of his inten- 
 tions refpeding the boy; and that after he 
 had received the order, he would call at the 
 old woman's on his return, and bring the 
 boy home with him. If the reader be a 
 complaifant hufband, whofe chief pleafure 
 is to oblige his wife, he will think this 
 piece of complaifance a thing of courfe, and 
 not worth recording ; but as Mr, George 
 Barnet hardly ever thought of doing an 
 obliging thing to any body, unlefs when he 
 was prompted to it by his wife, it feemed 
 neceflary to mention one thing of that 
 nature, which arofe from his own proper 
 fuggeftion, and was in all likelihood owing 
 to the extraordinary good humour he was
 
 EDWARD. 119 
 
 put Into by the fortunate fale of the houfe 
 to the mulatto. This is the more pro- 
 bable, becaufe, as foon as Mr. Barnet ar- 
 rived in London, he hurried to his friend 
 Wormwood, on purpofe to triumph over 
 him on account of his fuccefs in that tranf- 
 aftion. After informing him of it, and of 
 the profit he had gained, " Now," faid he, 
 ** Mr. Wormwood, with all your wifdom, 
 what do you think now?" 
 
 " Think," faid Wormwood ; " I think 
 what I have long thought, that it is bet- 
 ter to be lucky than wife. But pray," 
 added he, " what is become of the lion 
 and unicorn?" 
 
 " What lion and unicorn ? I know not 
 what you mean," faid Barnet. 
 
 " Why, the lion and unicorn that flood 
 at the gate," continued Wormwood ; " has 
 the mulatto got them to the bargain ?" 
 
 " You mean the two fphinxes," faid 
 Barnet. 
 
 " Aye, you were pleafed to call them. 
 
 fphinxes," replied Wormwood j " but I do 
 
 1 4 allure
 
 120 E D \V A R D. 
 
 afTure you, my good friend, that all the 
 fculptor's labour was not able to conceal the 
 original features of our old acquaintance 
 the lion and unicorn, which were as fully 
 recognized by the whole country, when they 
 flood at the gate of your celebrated fabric, 
 as when they were in the fculptor's court. 
 And let me now tell you, my good friend, 
 that this attempt to convert thofe two royal 
 animals into a couple of bafe Egyptians, 
 was thought as difgraceful to his Majefty's 
 arms, as permitting them to be placed over 
 the (hop-doors of perfumers, milliners, cork- 
 cutters, fhoe-makers, breeches- makers, and 
 other tradefmen ; as in every quarter of 
 London they are now feen with indignation, 
 by all who wifh to keep up the proper dif- 
 tindtion between the king and the cobler." 
 
 Mr. Barnet, having left Wormwood, went 
 about the principal bufinefs that had brought 
 him to town, and then waited on the over- 
 feers of the workhoufe from which the boy 
 had been fent. They had been previoufly 
 informed by a letter from Mrs. Barnet of 
 his intentions, and immediately gave him 
 
 aa
 
 EDWARD. 121 
 
 an order to the old woman, to deliver to his 
 care Edward Evilen, which was the name 
 pinned to the child's cap when he was firft 
 left at the workhoufe, and by which he was 
 called while there.
 
 12* EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XIV. 
 
 Let not ambition mock their ufeful toil, 
 Their humble joys and deftiny obfcure, 
 Nor grandeur hear with a difdainful fmile. 
 The fhort and fimple annals of the poor. 
 
 GRAY. 
 
 A S Mr. Barnet, on his return to his own 
 houfe, approached the old woman's 
 cottage , a young man in a very high phae- 
 ton drove rapidly pad him over the heath, 
 His name was Sir Charles Royfton; he was 
 heir to a very confiderable eftate, and at 
 the age of eighteen, by the afliftance of 
 Jews, and Chriftians of the fame latitude of 
 confcience, contrived to fpend fix times as 
 much money as he was allowed by his 
 guardians. 
 
 Sir Charles looked frequently behind him, 
 and laughed immoderately, as often as he 
 turned his head; the footmen feemed as 
 merry as their matter. 
 
 When
 
 EDWARD. 123 
 
 When Mr. Barnet came to the part of 
 the common nearly oppofite to the old 
 woman's cottage, he found that all this 
 mirth was occafioned by the phaeton's hav- 
 ing thrown down a feaman with a wooden 
 leg, who had not been expeditious enough 
 in getting out of the way, as this youth 
 drove ' along : the feaman was fo much 
 bruifed that he could not ftand; a circle of 
 people from the adjacent hamlets fur- 
 rounded him as he lay on the ground. 
 
 Sir Mathew Maukim and his lady flopped 
 their carriage, and inquired what was the 
 matter. 
 
 " It is a poor failor," faid one of the 
 crowd," who has been overturned, and fadly 
 bruifed by a gentleman in a phaeton.'* 
 
 " Why did not the fellow get out of the 
 gentleman's way ?" faid Sir Mathew. 
 
 " He tried to do fo; but it was not in his 
 power to run faft enough, being as how 
 he has a wooden leg," faid one of the 
 group. 
 
 "A wooden leg!" cried Sir Mathew; 
 ? how came he by a wooden leg r" 
 
 "His
 
 124 E D W A R D. 
 
 " His real leg was carried off by a cannon 
 bullet in a fea-fight, 1 ' anfwered the lame 
 perfon. 
 
 "A fea- fight!" repeated Sir Mathew; 
 " what the devil took him into a fea-fight ?" 
 
 " He went to fight for his king and coun- 
 try," anfwered another, (a penfioner from 
 Chelfea hofpital,) " as was his duty." 
 
 c Yes, yes," faid Sir Mathew, " that was 
 his duty, to be fure ; we muft all fight for 
 our king and country; but he ought to have 
 got out of the gentleman's way, for all that; 
 he ought to have ftepp'd a little afide to let 
 him pafs." 
 
 *' Why, pleafe your honour," faid the N 
 penfioner, ' the gentleman drove fo damn'd 
 faft, that the poor fellow could not get out 
 of his way more than of the bullet's ; if he 
 had had time he would have ftepp'd a little 
 afide to let them both pafs." 
 
 " Well, in my opinion," rejoined Sir Ma- 
 thew, " the gentleman was to blame, and 
 if he were here, I fhould tell him fo." 
 
 " The poor man feems much bruifed, and 
 unable to move," faid the penfioner. 
 
 " Poor
 
 EDWARD. 125 
 
 " Poor creature !" cried Lady Bab Mau- 
 kifh, in a very fympathizing tone, " he is 
 much to be pitied." 
 
 " That he is," echoed feveral voices from 
 the crowd. 
 
 " Is that boy the poor man's fon?" faid 
 Lady Bab, pointing to Edward Evilen, who 
 fat by the man, helping to fupport his head 
 with one hand, and holding a piece of gin- 
 gerbread to his mouth with the other; "is 
 that man your father, child?" continued 
 jQie, addrefling Edward. 
 
 " No," replied he ; "I have no fa- 
 ther." 
 
 " Where is your mother ?" rejoined Lady 
 Bab. 
 
 " I have no mother neither," anfwered 
 the boy. 
 
 41 What, are they both dead ?" faid me. 
 
 " I can't tell," faid he ; I never faw 
 them." 
 
 " Has nobody ever told you, whether 
 your parents were dead or alive ?" 
 
 "I never faw anybody that knew them." 
 
 " What
 
 126 E D W A R D, 
 
 " What a miferable little wretch thou 
 muft be 1" cried Lady Bab, fhrugging up 
 her fhoulders. 
 
 " Well, but," refumed Sir Mathew Mauk- 
 ifh, addreiftng the crowd, " why do you 
 not carry this bruifed man into fome of 
 your houfes and put him to bed, and give 
 him a cordial, and take care of him 'till he 
 recovers ?" 
 
 " Why, Lord ! your honour/' cried one 
 of the people, " none of us have fpare beds ; 
 moft of us lie two or three in a bed al- 
 ready." 
 
 " Ah ! the odious creatures!" cried Lady 
 Maukifli. 
 
 " I'll tell you, neighbours," faid one, who 
 was well acquainted with the character of 
 Sir Mathew ; " we had beft carry this poor 
 man to Sir Mathew MaukiuYs houfej he 
 will certainly order him to be well taken 
 care of, and he is much more able than 
 any of us to maintain him till he reco- 
 
 rers." 
 
 II "Drive
 
 EDWARD. 127 
 
 "Drive on," cried Sir Mathew, put- 
 ting his head haftily out of the coach win- 
 dow. 
 
 " Why do you not drive on, firrah," 
 fqueaked Lady Bab, from the other win- 
 dow. 
 
 " Ah, the odious creatures !" faid the 
 old foldier, mimicking Lady Bab's voice. 
 
 " The devil drive you both for a couple 
 of hard-hearted niggards," cried the perfon 
 who knew Sir Mathew and his lady. 
 
 " What a pity to let a man lie alone on 
 the cold ground !" faid a young woman. 
 
 *' Efpecially a fellow chriftian!" added 
 an old one, who flood by her. 
 
 " Chriftian or Turk," faid the Chelfea 
 penfioner, " fmce nothing better can be 
 done, if fome of you will help me to carry 
 him into my hut, I'll take the beft care of 
 him I can, and I know my wife will make 
 him welcome. How fare you now, old 
 boy?" continued he, addreffing the fea- 
 man, who feemed to recover. 
 
 " Thank you, thank you, brother," re*- 
 plied the feaman, " only a little damaged in 
 
 tb*
 
 128 EDWARD. 
 
 the larboard fide, and in the ftern j but I hope 
 to live and repay your confort and you for 
 all your kindnefs ; and if I chance to meet 
 the frefh-water fpark who ran foul of me, 
 mayhap I fliall repay him alfo." 
 
 The failor, being carried into the old fol- 
 dier's hut, was laid on a bed of ftraw, pre- 
 pared by his wife. At that inftant Evilen, 
 who had preffed into the hut with the 
 crowd, was called out by the old woman, 
 who prefented him to Mr. Barnet. 
 
 The boy feemed uneafy when the old 
 woman told him, that he was to go with 
 that gentleman. " The children are always 
 forry to leave me, pleafe your honour," faid 
 the old woman. 
 
 " I am not a bit forry to leave you," faid 
 Evilen. 
 
 " What are you forry for then?" faid 
 Barnet. 
 
 " To go with^ow," replied the boy. 
 " Your honour muft excufe his ignorance," 
 faid the old woman ; " for he has been but 
 a fhort time with me; and was bred among 
 the low Vulgar at the work-houfe." 
 
 "Why
 
 EDWARD. 129 
 
 " Why are you forry to go with me ?" 
 faid Barnet to the boy. 
 
 " Becaufe you are a gentleman," he re- 
 plied. 
 
 " What makes you diflike gentlefolks ?" 
 Mr. Barnet afked. 
 
 " One of them drove over the poor failor 
 with the wooden leg, and then laughed at 
 him, when he tumbled on the ground," faid 
 the boy. 
 
 " You muft not go, child, for to prefume 
 to blame quality folks," faid the old woman ; 
 " which, to be fure, are our betters, being by 
 the orders of Providence more richer than 
 the poor; and although the hearts of the 
 rich quality, mayhap, are harder than ours 
 be, yet," continued fhe, addreffing Mr. 
 Barnet, " that is not their fault, for your ho- 
 nour knows they cannot help it, on account 
 of their money, which would make poor 
 folks the fame, if fo be that they had it. 
 Might it not, pleafe your honour?" 
 
 " Perhaps it might," faid Barnet ; " there 
 is no knowing till they are tried." 
 
 VOL. I. K I wifh
 
 130 E D W A R D. 
 
 " I wim I was tried," faid the old woman, 
 'i juft for the fatisfaction of knowing ; but 
 it is not for you," continued me, looking 
 at the boy, " to throw dirt on the rich, for 
 mayhap you may fome day be one of them, 
 yourfelf." 
 
 " I'd much rather be a poor man, like 
 Nic the old foldier," faid Evilen. 
 
 " Who is Nic the old foldier?' 1 Mr. Bar- 
 net alked. 
 
 " He is a poor Chelfea penfioner, who 
 Jives with his wife in that there cottage, 
 and fometimes does a job of work to help 
 the penfion to hold out to the year's end. 
 He is liked very much in thefe here parts, 
 pleafe your honour, becaufe he is always 
 ready with his joke, and tells us ftories of 
 the wars, and General Wolf, and General 
 Quebec, and fuch li -vC great commanders ; 
 but after all, he is but a poor devil, with 
 hardly a whole rag to his back, except 
 upon Sundays, and upon the verfenary of 
 General Quebec." 
 
 " What is that?" faid Barnet. 
 
 "Good
 
 EDWARD. 131 
 
 "Good Lord! does your honour not 
 know the verfenary of General Quebec ?" 
 cried fhe. 
 
 " Not I," faid Earner. 
 
 " Well, that is curous," faid the old wo- 
 man ; " but we all know it in thefe here 
 parts, by the means of old Nic. Good gra- 
 cious, I wifh your honour but faw him at 
 the verfenary!" 
 
 " Why, what the devil is the verfenary ?" 
 cried Barnet. 
 
 " I'll tell you pirticulary, pleafe your ho- 
 nour," faid {he, " if your honour will only 
 have a little patience." 
 
 " Well, well," cried Barnet, " let us 
 hear." 
 
 "Why, then, your honour muft know, that 
 the verfenary of General Quebec comes round, 
 like Chriftmas, only once a year, and then old 
 Nic appears in all his glory, with his red fear- 
 let coat on his back, and fierce cock'd laced 
 hat on his head, and a uniformal fword by 
 his fide ; and then he ftruts away to the ale- 
 houfe, where he ufually meets three or four old 
 foldiers, who comes there to keep the verfe- 
 K 2 nary
 
 E D W A R D. 
 
 nary along with him ; and fo they drinks 
 the healths of all the old commanders who 
 were killed abroad : and then they begins to 
 tell ftories about the wars, and defcribe how 
 the battles were won by the Engliih, and 
 loft by the French and Spaniards ; for your 
 honour knows, that the French and Spaniards 
 never beat the Englifli in their lives, though 
 they are two to one. And then old Nic 
 gives a full and true account of how Ge- 
 neral Wolf was killed, and General Quebec 
 taken pnlbner ; and then they defire blind 
 George, who was once a grenadier, and now 
 iells ballads, to ling the Britiflj Grenadiers^ 
 which he does ; all about Mars the god of 
 war, and all the other gods defcending upon 
 fpcars *, and then they all join in the rorus, 
 and beats the grenadiers march with their 
 tongues, and they are all as drunk as lords, 
 
 * To underftand this it may be neceflary to infert one ftan7 
 of the fong to which the old woman alludes: 
 
 " Great Jove, the god of thunder, and Mars, the god of 
 war; 
 
 ' Neptune with his trident, Apollo in his car, 
 And all the gods celeftial, defcendtd 'frsm their fpkeres t 
 ' To view with admiration the Britifh Grenadiers." 
 
 and
 
 EDWARD. 133 
 
 and then I always helps Margery to carry 
 
 Nic home. -And then and then, this 
 
 is the verfenary of General Quebec, pleafe 
 your honour." 
 
 The old woman, who Teemed to be ani- 
 mated with the fubject, fpoke with fo much 
 vehemence in giving this account, that Evi- 
 len imagined me was in a paffion, and had 
 been giving a bad character of the foldier 
 to Mr. Barnet; the boy therefore faid, " But 
 for all that you have been telling, poor old 
 Nic took the feaman with the wooden leg 
 into his houfe." 
 
 " That he did," faid the old woman; " for 
 old Nic is a good-natured devil in the main, 
 though he loves fport, and is a little too 
 much on the jokobus with his betters fome- 
 times." 
 
 a All your jokers," faid Barnet, " are in- 
 clined, out of mere fpite, to throw them out 
 on ready-money people." 
 
 " But your ready-money people, as your 
 honour muft know," faid the old woman, 
 " are no ways inclined to throw it out on 
 jokers." 
 
 K 3 For
 
 134 EDWARD. 
 
 " For which reafon," faid Barnet, " old 
 Nic is more merry than wife." 
 
 " Your honour is in the right," faid the 
 old woman ; " and that may be the reafon 
 of his being fo poor; for the rich are feldom 
 fo merry as one would expert, confidering 
 they have nothing to do, but are often fad 
 and dull, as your honour muft know by ex- 
 perience. 
 
 " Is the man with the wooden leg much 
 hurt?" faid Barnet. 
 
 " Yes," replied Evilen, " for he could 
 not eat gingerbread." 
 
 " Poor man !" faid Barnet, a little afFe&ed. 
 
 " Come and fee him," faid Evilen, point- 
 ing at the foldier's hut ; " he is in there." 
 
 " Hold your peace, ybu little fool," faid 
 the old woman ; "do you think, his honour 
 will go for to enter into fuch a hole. You 
 muft excufe him, pleafe your honour," con- 
 tinued me, " he fpeaks through ignorance, 
 not knowing the nature of gentlefolks ; but 
 he does not mean to affront your honour, 
 more or lefs." 
 
 "I do
 
 EDWARD. 135 
 
 *' I do not fuppofe he does," faid Barnet ; 
 *' but there are fuch a number of poor ob- 
 jects, and diftreffing ftories, popping on one 
 from every quarter, that my hand," conti- 
 nued he, pulling out his purfe, " is hardly 
 ever out of my purfe j but here," added he, 
 putting half a crown into the boy's hand, 
 " go and give the feaman this." 
 
 Evilen ran bounding for joy." There, 
 faid he to the failor, the geutl ^man in the 
 coach fends you that." 
 
 " God blefs the gentleman, and you both, 
 my dear boy,'* faid the feaman. 
 
 " Amen," cried the foldier. " I am glad 
 to fee any thing good come from a coach at 
 laft." 
 
 " Now," faid Barnet, when Evilen re- 
 turned, " I am going to carry you to a good 
 friend of yours." 
 
 " Ah," cried the old woman, " this worthy 
 gentleman is going to take you to the lady 
 who was fo kind to you." 
 " Are you ?" cried the boy. 
 " I am, indeed," faid Barnet. 
 
 K 4 Let
 
 136 EDWARD. 
 
 " Let us go then," faid he, grafping Mr. 
 Barnet's hand. 
 
 Having made a fmall prefent to the old 
 woman, Mr. Barnet ordered the coachman 
 to drive home. 
 
 Evilen afked frequently as they drove 
 along, if they were near the lady's houfe, 
 and he ihewed the ftrongeft figns of joy at 
 the end of their journey, when he faw Mrs. 
 Barnet. 
 
 The neglect which this poor boy had ex- 
 perienced in general, and the hard ufage he 
 had received from fome individuals, ren- 
 dered him peculiarly fenfible to the kindnefs 
 ef Mrs. Barnet, which kindled within his 
 young bofom fuch a glow of gratitude and 
 affection as he had never felt before. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet could not help perceiving 
 this, and was equally pleafed with that in- 
 genuoufnefs of difpofition, and quicknefs of 
 apprehenfion, of which he gave daily proofs ; 
 and which ingratiated him more and more 
 with this good woman, who felt augment- 
 ing fatisfaction in the thought of faving fo 
 fine a boy from being crufhed by poverty 
 
 and
 
 EDWARD. 137 
 
 and neglect, and in the hopes of bringing 
 the rewards of talents and integrity within 
 his reach. 
 
 As he had been fo lately ill, Ihe poft- 
 poned boarding him at a fchool till he fhould 
 fully recover his ftrength. 
 
 Meanwhile, Ihe ordered cloathstobe made 
 up, and appointed a bed for him in a clofet 
 adjoining to her own dreffing-room. 
 
 Edward, in common with all children, de- 
 rived pleafure, no doubt, from the fight of his 
 new cloaths, as well as from the other com- 
 forts of his prefent fituation ; but his own 
 good fortune had not the effect on his mind, 
 which it has been obferved to have on the 
 minds of many; it feemed not even in the 
 fmalleft degree to render him unfeeling to 
 the misfortunes of others, or forgetful of his 
 former acquaintance. Of his remembrance 
 of the old foldier and the failor, he gave 
 a fingular proof one day when fome com- 
 pany dined with Mr. Barnet; for, on feeing 
 more victuals fet on the table than he 
 thought fufficient for the people prefent, he 
 &id aloud, looking to Mr. Earner,, " I wifh 
 
 old
 
 i 3 8 E D W A R D. 
 
 old Nichadfome of that !" This unexpected 
 wifh threw the company into a fit of laugh- 
 ter ; and Mrs. Barnet, when fhe recovered 
 herielf, faid to him, " why do you wifh fo, 
 child :" " Eecaufe," anfwered he, " it would 
 maintain him and bis wife feveral days, and 
 he would give part of it to the poor bruifed 
 jailor." This reply did not make the matter 
 clearer; but Mrs. Barnet perceiving that her 
 hufband underftood to what the boy alluded, 
 requefted an explanation of him. He de- 
 iked Edward himfelf to inform the com- 
 pany of the whole ftory of the Chelfea 
 penfioner, and the feaman with the wooden 
 leg. Evilen acquitted himfelf of this tafk 
 in the dialect of a child, it is true, yet 
 fo as to intereft every one that heard 
 him, greatly affected the heart of Mrs. 
 Barnet, and {hewed the goodnefs of his 
 own. For as the fick and weakly have in 
 general more fympathy with thofe labour- 
 ing under difeafe or delicacy of conflitution, 
 than the healthy and robuft, fo this judicious 
 woman had obferved, that fome people, 
 while they feem to compaflionate the mife- 
 
 ries
 
 EDWA R D. 139 
 
 ries of others, are only pitying themfelves. 
 Such people give proofs of humanity only 
 while their feelings are kept alive by the 
 dread of falling into misfortunes fimilar to 
 thofe which they compaflionate in others, 
 but the fame perfons being by accident raifed 
 above the fphere of like calamities, (hake 
 off their fympathy, and feem to change their 
 nature, like grubs converted into butterflies; 
 who being raifed from the duft on their 
 new lent wings, expand all their finery, 
 flutter from oae flowery object to another, 
 court the fun-fhine, and think no more of 
 their old humble companions. Mrs. Barnet 
 therefore was highly pleafed to find that 
 Evilen was not of this clifpofition, but re- 
 tained his fenfibility towards the inhabitants 
 of the heath, after he himfelf was tranfported 
 to a warmer region.
 
 140 E D W A R D. 
 
 CHAP. XV. 
 
 -Non in caro voluptas 
 
 Summa, fed in teipfo eft, tu pulmemaria quasre 
 
 Sudar.do. Ho*i 
 
 T\yfRS. Barnet was not a perfon in whom 
 the emotions of pity evaporate in fighs, 
 or melt in tears, without any other effect 
 nor one of thofe fafhionable philanthro- 
 pifts, who taking credit for an unlimited 
 portion of humanity, by oftentatious fymp- 
 toms of fenfibility, wipe their eyes, pocket 
 their handkerchiefs, and think no more 
 on the wretched, in whofe diftrefs they 
 have taken fo affecting a part. Nobody 
 had heard Mrs. Barnet's fighs, nor feen 
 her tears for the maimed feaman ; yet his 
 ftory had dwelt in her mind, and feeling 
 a flrong defire to fee both him and the 
 foldier, fhe took the refolution of driving to 
 the hut of the latter. 
 
 1 i That
 
 EDWARD. 141 
 
 That me might have the more time for 
 this jaunt, no company being invited but 
 the parfon, fhe propofed next day to her hu- 
 band, that they fhould dine a little earlier than 
 ufual ; and to induce him to agree to her 
 propofal, fhe hinted that two or three of his 
 favourite dimes were ordered for dinner. 
 . He immediately aflented ; but unfortu- 
 nately when the dinner was ferved, Mr. 
 Barnet had little or no appetite, and was in 
 very ill-humour. It is not quite clear whe- 
 ther his ill-humour deprived him of appetite, 
 or his want of appetite put him into ill-hu- 
 mour ; but it is certain, that he fat down to 
 dinner with both thofe difagreeable guefls, 
 and as the firft was greatly difliked by Mr. 
 Barnet, and the fecond by his wife, it is pro- 
 bable that neither was invited, but that the 
 one introduced the other. 
 
 Mr. Barnet had hardly tafted the carp, 
 till he declared that it was not fuffieiently 
 done. It was immediately fent back to the 
 cook. On its return, Barnet fwore it was 
 worfe than at tirft, quite over-ftewed, and 
 abfolutely not eatable "This mutton, how- 
 ever,
 
 14* E D W A R D. 
 
 ever, is excellent, my dear," faid Mrs. Bar- 
 net, " mall I have the pleafure of helping 
 you to a little ?" 
 
 " No I am iurfeited with mutton," an- 
 fwered Barnet pee^v'fhly. tc But I wi(h you 
 had only thought of ordering fome of the 
 venifon we had yefterday to be ftewed. * 
 I fhould have liked a litrle of that ; but 
 no fuch thing is ever thought of in my 
 family." 
 
 As he finimed his obfervation, a footman 
 entered with a diih of ftewed venifon. 
 
 " I am glad, my dear," laid Mrs. Barnet, 
 * 6 that it has happened to be thought of to- 
 day." 
 
 Barnqt was more difappointed at lofmg a 
 pretext for venting his ill-humour, than 
 pleafed at the appearance of the difh. After 
 fwallowing a few mouthfuls, he fent it away, 
 faying, " it was fmoked." 
 
 " Allow me to help you to a wing of a 
 chicken, my dear," refumed Mrs. Barnet; 
 " you ufed to like chicken, with a flice of 
 tongue. 1 ' 
 
 10 
 
 Is
 
 EDWARD. i 43 
 
 " Is the tongue fmoked ?" faid Barnet. 
 
 " No, my dear," replied his wife. 
 
 4< Then I am for none of either," fald 
 Barnet ; " though, if the tongue had been 
 fmoked inftead of the venifon, I might 
 have made a tolerable dinner.' 1 
 
 Mrs. Barnet nodded to a footman, who 
 immediately withdrew. 
 
 " It is very hard," continued Mr. Barnet, 
 " that they fhould have fpoiled one difh, by 
 what would have rendered the other excel- 
 lent." 
 
 " It is fortunate, my dear, that we chance 
 to have a very good fmoked tongue alfo," 
 faid Mrs. Barnet ; <c and here it comes," con- 
 tinued fhe, as the fervant returned. " Pray 
 try this wing with a (lice of it," 
 
 Barnet, quite at a lofs what fault to find 
 next, accepted the difh with which his wife 
 preferred him ; but being entirely without 
 appetite, after mincing the meat, and play- 
 ing a little with the knife and fork, he gave 
 his plate to a footman, faying, " I think I 
 fhould prefer fomething cold ; but I fuppofe 
 there is no cold meat in the houfe," 
 
 u Forgive
 
 144- E D \V A R D. 
 
 <c Forgive me, my dear, you may have 
 either a like of cold beef or cold veal ; which 
 do you chufe?" faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " Is there any cold mutton ?" the hufband 
 afked. 
 
 " I do not remember to have ever feen 
 you eat cold mutton," replied the wife. 
 
 " I fhould like it very much at prefent, 
 however," faid Barnet : and having at 
 length hit on what he thought a juft caufe 
 of difccntent, continued grumbling till the 
 dinner was removed ; and Mrs. Barnet now- 
 perceiving that he had more fatisfa&ion in 
 that, than in any thing that could be done or 
 faid to pleafe him, allowed him to enjoy it 
 without interruption, until he happened to 
 fay, " I thought you intended to drive out 
 this afternoon :" 
 
 Mrs. Barnet immediately took the hint, 
 wifhed her hufband and the parfon a good 
 afternoon ; and taking Evilen into the car- 
 riage with her, fhe ordered the coachman 
 to drive to the foldier's hut.
 
 EDWARD. 145 
 
 CHAP. .XVI. 
 
 The broken foldier kindly bade to ftay, 
 Sat by his fire, and talk'd the night away ; 
 Wept o'er his wounds, or tales of forrow done, 
 Shoulder 'd his crutch, and fhevved how fiejds were won. 
 
 GOLDSMITH. 
 
 IT/HEN they drew very near the hut, they 
 heard fmging, and in the intervals fe- 
 yeral hearty burfts of laughter. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet deputed Evilen to acquaint 
 the foldier with her arrival. 
 
 The boy found him fitting with a large 
 tankard in his hand, between another foldier 
 and his own wife. 
 
 " Nic !" cried Evilen, as he rufhed into 
 the cottage, " here is a lady who wants to 
 fee you." 
 
 " Wants to fee me!" cried the foldier. 
 
 " I doubt you are miftaken, my dear; it is 
 
 long fmceany ladies have wanted to fee me." 
 
 " Come along, cried Evilen, feizing 
 
 fais hand, and leading him to the coach, 
 
 Which having reached he gavu him a pufh 
 
 voi. i. L towards
 
 146 EDWARD. 
 
 towards Mrs. Barnet, faying, " There is 
 honeft old Nic !" 
 
 " I was defirous to fee you, friend," faid 
 {he, " and of knowing what had become of 
 the poor feaman, who received a hurt fome 
 time fince at your door." 
 
 The foldier then informed her, that the 
 failor was fo much recovered of his bruifes, 
 that he had fet out that very morning on 
 the top of a ftage-coach for London, and 
 would be that evening at Greenwich ; for 
 he belonged to the Hofpital, from which, 
 having had leave of abfence for a fortnight, 
 he was returning when the accident hap- 
 pened to him. 
 
 " I am glad he is fo well," faid Mrs. Bar- 
 net, " and I am glad to fee you, becaufe of 
 your humanity to him." 
 
 " There was no great matter of humanity 
 in what I did, madam," replied the foldier; 
 " an old foldier could not let a wounded 
 failor lie on the ground, when he had a hut 
 to give him flicker in ; one who could act 
 fuch a part would defer ve to be drummed 
 out of the army, inftead of enjoying his 
 
 Majefty's
 
 EDWARD. 147 
 
 Majefty's bounty, as I do, God Almighty 
 blefshim!" 
 
 " You have a penfion from the Chelfea 
 Hofpital ?" faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " Yes, that I have," cried the foldier ; 
 " and it is regularly paid, although I do no 
 manner of duty." 
 
 " You were wounded, perhaps ?" rejoined 
 Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " I was mot thrqugh the body at the bat- 
 tle on the heights of Abraham, where Ge- 
 neral Wolf was killed, pleafe your ladyfhip ; 
 but he had the fatisfa&ion of knowing that 
 the enemy fled before he expired j and well 
 he deferved fuch a death, for he was an ex- 
 cellent officer." 
 
 " You could do no more duty as a fol- 
 dier, after being fo wounded ?" faid Mrs. 
 Barnet. 
 
 " Every bullet, your ladyfhip knows," 
 replied the foldier, " has its commiflion ; 
 that which went through my body had riot 
 a commiflion for death, but only for wound- 
 ing; and fo I recovered, and did my duty the 
 following winter in the action near Quebec, 
 where General Murray commanded." 
 
 L 3 ** I hope
 
 148 EDWARD. 
 
 " I hope you was not wounded there 
 alfo ?" faid Mrs. Earner. 
 
 4< Yes, I received a fhot in my moulder, 
 which difabled me from ufmg my firelock ; 
 and what is more provoking, it was at the 
 beginning of the adion, and I had only fired 
 three times ; and fo being of no farther ufe, 
 I was fent back to the Hofpital, and I faw 
 no more of the battle-, which I fhould have 
 ' been glad to defcribe to your ladyfhip, if I 
 had remained. 
 
 " You were long of recovering of this 
 laft wound ?" faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " Very long, pleafe your ladyfhip, for the 
 bone was hurt ; I was fent home and recom- 
 mended to Chelfea, which I obtained, and 
 am an out-penfioner j but although I fuffered 
 a good deal for feveral months at firft, yet, 
 thank God, I at laft had fome intervals of 
 eafe, and there was not a great deal of pain, 
 except when a little bit of bone was about 
 to throw off now it feidom troubles me; 
 but although I have not all the ufe of my 
 arm, I could ftill make a fliift to draw a 
 trigger againft the French or Spaniards, if 
 there was occafion." 
 
 "Have
 
 E D W A R D. 149 
 
 *' Have you nothing to maintain you and 
 your wife, but the fmall penfion from the 
 Hofpital ?" faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " O! yes," anfwered thefoidier; " I can 
 do a little work as a gardener, to which I was 
 originally bred, that is, when my ihoulder 
 is not very painful ; and my wife is a very 
 careful and induftrious woman, and ftill 
 able to gain a little alfo, and fo we have 
 great reafon to be thankful, being by the 
 king's bounty and God's goodnefs enabled 
 not only to maintain ourielves, but alfo to 
 entertain a friend fometimes, which I confefs 
 we were doing juft now; for as your lady- 
 fhip knows, life is but a roughilh journey, 
 at beft j and fo Margery and I love tojtrew 
 the way over 'with flowers , asthefonggoes." 
 " And pray," laid Mrs, Barnet fmiling, 
 " what kind of flowers were you ftrewing 
 juft now ?" 
 
 " Anon ?" cried the foldier ; not quite 
 underflanding the queftion. 
 
 " May I afc," refurned Mrs. Barnet, 
 " what the prefent entertainment with which 
 you regale your friend confifts of?''
 
 1 50 EDWARD. 
 
 " It confifts," replied the foldier, " of a 
 loaf of very good brown bread, an excellent 
 Suffolk cheefe, and a can of gin and water." 
 
 Mrs. Barnet was ftruck at the fatisfaction 
 with which this poor foldier, who certainly 
 had fome merit with his country, enjoyed 
 the fmall portion of good things which 
 fell to his fhare, and the recollection of her 
 hufband's difcontent, in the midft of a far 
 more fumptuous allotment; the contraft 
 ftruck her fo forcibly, that flie heaved a figh, 
 and for an inftant threw up her eyes. 
 
 The foldier miftook the fource of her 
 emotion, and thought fhe was comparing 
 in her mind the comforts of his fituation, 
 with the hardfhips to which many were 
 cxpofed. Under this impreflion he added, 
 " I am very fenfible, madam, and fo is my 
 poor Margery, that we have great reafon to 
 be thankful with our fituation, confidering 
 that we are how both old, and that without 
 my pehfion, we could not maintain our- 
 felves: Would to the Lord, that every worthy 
 honeft heart in this wide world were as 
 well provided for!'* 
 
 "lam
 
 EDWARD. 151 
 
 u I am fure," faid Mrs. Barnet, with a 
 fmile of benevolence to the foldier, " that 
 a heart fo eafily fatisfied as yours ought not 
 to know want." 
 
 " I hardly ever did, madam," faid he, 
 " particularly fmce we fettled at this place; 
 for we have our hut for almoft nothing ; 
 bread, cheefe, and fmall beer are tolerably 
 cheap ; and the gin is excellent : If your 
 ladyfhip has occafion for any, I can re- 
 commend that at the Hog in Armour on this 
 heath, for as wholefome Holland's as any in 
 England." 
 
 " I am much obliged to you," faid Mrs; 
 Barnet, laughing ; " but pray what company 
 have you with you ; you feemed very happy 
 and merry when I came ?" 
 
 " We have* no other company, pleafe 
 your Ladyfhip," replied the penfioner, " but 
 a poor foldier, who I happened to meet on 
 the road ; poor fellow, he .feemed faint with 
 the heat, and the weight of his knapfack; 
 and fo, as it was juft about the time of our 
 dinner, I invited him to {hare with Margery 
 and me ; we all fell to accordingly, and I 
 doubt if many people in the parifh have 
 L 4 ' made
 
 152 EDWARD. 
 
 made a better dinner than the foldier ancf 
 I; for we were both ver-y hungry, and as I 
 faid before, every thing was good of its kind ; 
 as for Margery, fhe eats no great matter, 
 and hardly ever takes above one draught 
 of gin and water ; but I confefs the ftranger 
 and I were beginning to get a little merry 
 when your lady (hip arrived." 
 
 " He is a foldier, I think you fay ?" re- 
 fumed Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " Of the 20th, pleafe your ladyfhip," 
 anfweredhe; " there is not a finer regiment 
 in thefervice, it was once General Wolf s." 
 
 " Here is a crown for him," faid Mrs. 
 Barnet, *' it will help him on to his regi- 
 
 ment." 
 
 " That it will indeed," rejoined the pen- 
 fioner; " efpecially as, poor fellow, he feems 
 to ftand much in need of a pak of new 
 fhoes ; thofe he has being worn quite 
 through, and he can ill afford to get another 
 pair, for he tells me he is already under 
 ftoppages." 
 
 " What are ftoppages?" faid Mrs. Bar- 
 net. 
 
 " That
 
 EDWARD. 153 
 
 *' That part of a foldier's pay^" anfwered 
 he, " which is Hopped to purchafe necef- 
 faries." 
 
 " If any of a foldier's pay is flopped," 
 faid Mrs. Barnet, " on what does he live?'* 
 
 " On the remainder," anfwered the pen- 
 floner. 
 
 " Why the whole is but fixpence a-day," 
 refumed Mrs. Barnet; " and to me it feems 
 a miracle how they contrive to live on it." 
 " Britifh foldiers are famous for perform- 
 ing miracles," replied the veteran ; " and 
 they actually perform a greater than you 
 imagine; for they do contrive to live on lefe 
 than fixpence a day." 
 
 " Lefs !" cried Mrs. Barnet. 
 " Ay ! lefsj madam; God love your foul !" 
 added the foldier : " a private has not fix- 
 pence a day to fubfift on; are there not 
 ftoppages for fhoes, and {lockings, and 
 fhirts ? for thofe Government allows cannot 
 ferve all the year round ; and in fome regi- 
 ments there are ftoppages for fuperfluous 
 articles of drefs: fome commanding offi- 
 cers pay for thefe out of their own pockets, 
 but others do not; and it is very hard on 
 *3 the
 
 154 EDWARD. 
 
 the men to be obliged to pay for fome kick- 
 ihaws that are of no ufe, but to make them 
 look fmarter on the parade, and alfo to have 
 the flower puffed on their heads that would 
 help to make a pudding for their bellies ; 
 in my notion, this is not only curfedly hard 
 hearted, but alfo damn'd fooliih, aiking your 
 ladyihip's pardon ; for what fignifies making 
 fops of Britim foldiers ; we fhall never beat 
 the French at foppery." 
 
 a I fancy not," faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " You may fwear it, madam," added the 
 foldier; " your Frenchmen are all matters of 
 the art ; whereas the fineft courtiers in Eng- 
 land, as I have been told, are mere journey- 
 men ; and when they try to imitate the French, 
 they are like a parcel of awkward recruits, 
 compared to a company of old foldiers." 
 
 " I have heard fo alfo," faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " Then why (hould we pretend to con- 
 tend with them at their own weapons?" 
 added the foldier; " finglifh foldiers fhould 
 ftick to the old gun and bayonet; and 
 confidering how well they can ufe them 
 in defence of their country, I really do 
 think the country might allow them a 
 * 7 little
 
 EDWARD. 155 
 
 little more pay; but at prefent, I do allure 
 your ladyfhip, they feldom have more than 
 fourpence half- penny, and never above 
 fivepence a-day, to fubfift on." 
 
 " It is too'little indeed, friend," faid Mrs. 
 Barnet. 
 
 " But for all that," refumed the foldier, 
 " if your ladyfhip had only feen how cheer- 
 fully they afcended the precipices, and with 
 what fpirit they fought on the heights of 
 Abraham, you would have thought that 
 every man had dined at a fhilling or- 
 dinary." 
 
 " If it depended on me, they fhould never 
 have dined at a worfe," faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " Only get an addition of threepence, or 
 even twopence a-day, to their pay, and that 
 will fatisfy them, madam," added the foldier. 
 
 " I heartily wifli, my honeft fellow," re- 
 plied Mrs. Barnet, " that it were practicable 
 to augment the pay of both officers aad fol- 
 diers to-morrow." 
 
 " Practicable! I have been told, pleafe 
 your ladyfliip," rejoined the foldier, 
 " though I can hardly believe it, that certain 
 men, who were never either in the army 
 
 or
 
 156 E D W A R D. 
 
 or navy, but only ferve the Minifter at 
 home, are able to lay by, within a trifle, as 
 much money at the end of the year as even 
 a full Colonel, or a Captain of a man of war, 
 who ferves his king and country abroad.
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XVII. 
 
 See yonder poor o'er-labour'd wight, 
 
 So abjeft, mean, and vile, 
 Who begs a brother of the earth 
 
 To give him leave to toil ; 
 And fee his lordly fellow worm 
 
 The poor petition fcorn, 
 Unmindful, tho' a weeping wife 
 
 And helplefs offspring mourn. 
 
 BURNS. 
 
 NSTEAD of taking any notice of what the 
 foldier faid, at the conclufion of the laft 
 chapter, Mrs. Barnet afked, " Pray, did you 
 not fay that you flill did fome work as a 
 gardener?" 
 
 " Yes, madam," replied he ; " for I was 
 bred to the bufmefsof a gardener in my own 
 country, before I lifted as a foldier ; and I 
 am always glad to be employed, when I can 
 work; becaufe, over and above the wages, 
 it puts me in mind of Auld Lang Syn ; 
 that is to fay," added the foldier, after he 
 had wiped his eyes, " of my native country, 
 
 and 
 
 I
 
 158 E D W A R D. 
 
 and my relations and friends, who are dead 
 and gone.*' 
 
 ** Do you never think of returning to your 
 own country ?" faid fhe. 
 
 ** I have often thought of it," anfwered 
 the foldier ; " but I cannot leave Margery, 
 who loves England, which is her native 
 country, as vrell as I do mine; for (he is 
 blinded by prejudice, and befides, fhe is 
 unable for the journey, fo I am under the 
 neceflrty of leaving my bones on this fide of 
 the Tweed." 
 
 " Did not you fay that you ftill did 
 fome work as a gardener ?" 
 
 " I do," replied he. 
 
 " In whofe garden do you work at pre- 
 fer?" 
 
 " I ufed to work in Sir Mathew Maw- 
 kifhV' the foldier anfwered ; " but it feems 
 he took offence at fome words I threw out, 
 when the lame failor was hurt on the heath ; 
 and fo he ordered his gardener not to employ 
 me any more." 
 
 " Did that put you to much inconvem- 
 ency?" Mrs. Barnet afked. 
 
 "It
 
 EDWARD. 159 
 
 " It has proved a very great lofs, and has 
 given me much vexation," replied the fol- 
 dier ; " becaufe what I earned by garden- 
 work, when added to the penfion, enabled 
 Margery and me to aflift a poor neighbour 
 now and then ; or to give refrefhment to a 
 wandering ftranger, like this tired foldier ; 
 but what made it fall very hard was, that 
 after I had been long out of work, and 
 confequently without a fixpence of money, 
 poor Margery herfelf chanced to fall fick ; 
 I was obliged to run a little in debt to pro- 
 cure comfortable affiftance to her ; and to 
 clear this, when fhe recovered, I waited on 
 Sir Mathew, and begged that his honour 
 would allow his gardener to employ me 
 as before ; being more eager than ever to 
 fave a little money to do juftice to my cre- 
 ditors, who were all poor people, diftrefled 
 for the want of what I owed them : but 
 Sir Mathew, who has rather a hardim. kind 
 of a heart, called me an infolent old rafcal, 
 and fwore that I fhould never have another 
 farthing of his money: and never fince 
 our grenadiers were repulfed from the in- 
 trenchments at Montmorenci, did I feel a 
 
 heavier
 
 160 E D W A R D. 
 
 heavier heart, pleafe your ladyfhip, than I 
 returned with that day." 
 
 " No wonder," faid Mrs. Barnet j " it was 
 enough to drive you to deipair." 
 
 " I never give way to defpair," replied 
 the foldier, " for it is of no ufe ; and fo I 
 make it a rule always to keep it off." 
 
 " How do you contrive that r" 
 " By always trufting to Providence, and 
 fometimes taking a dram," anfwered he ; 
 " for is not there a righteous God above 
 who governs all ? and if there is black 
 clouds and ftorms to-day, may there not be 
 fair weather to-morrow ? and is there not 
 more fun-fhine than black clouds upon the 
 whole, even in this world, which gives me 
 good hopes for the next? And the very 
 next day, pleafe your Ladyihip, the parfon 
 of this parifh hearing of my diftrefs gave 
 me a guinea, which cleared me of debt; 
 and he has fmce recommended me to, a 
 farmer, who fometimes gives me a job of 
 work, and pays me very generoufly-^-but 
 as this cannot always be depended on, and 
 as Sir Mathew is wy enemy, my wife and 
 
 I are
 
 EDWARD. 161 
 
 I are refolved to fhift our quarters, but have 
 not yet fixed where to dired: our march." 
 
 " Let Margery and you dired: your march 
 to the village where I live," faid Mrs. Bar- 
 net ; " I know of a more convenient houfe 
 for you there than that you are now in ; and 
 {hall enfure you of conftant work as a 
 gardener; fo you may leave this as foon 
 as you pleafe." She then gave him di- 
 redions where to come, and having flipt a 
 guinea into his hand, which fhe told him 
 was for himfelf, fhe gave him half-a- guinea 
 more for his gueft, faying, " I did not know 
 that a poor foldier had both ftockings and 
 {hoes to provide out of his pay." She then 
 bid him farewell, in the midft of the 
 foldier's bleffings, who, while he poured 
 them in abundance on Mrs. Barnet, did 
 not forget little Edward. 
 
 A fliort time after this, the foldier and his 
 wife, having difpofed of the moveables they 
 did not think proper to take with them, re- 
 moved to the village near which Mrs. Bar- 
 net lived, where they found a fnug habita- 
 tion ready, into which they were conduded 
 by Mr. Barnet's footman and Edward, who 
 met them as they entered the village. 
 
 VOL. I. M
 
 162 E D W A R IX 
 
 CHAP. XVIII. 
 
 Do not as fome ungracious paftors do, 
 Shew me the fteep and thorny way to heaven j- 
 Whilit, like a puft and recklefs libertine, 
 Himfelf the primrofe path of dalliance treads, 
 And recks not his own rede. 
 
 SHAKESPEARE. 
 
 1T7HILE Mrs. Barnet cheriihed and culti- 
 vated the feeds of candour and be- 
 nevolence, which feemed fpontaneoufly to 
 germinate in the bread of this boy, fhe was 
 at pains to imprefs upon his mind the ne- 
 ceffity of diligence and clofe application, 
 for the acquifition of thofe accomplifhments 
 which would render him useful and re- 
 fpeclable. She made him fenfible, even at 
 that early age, of his very peculiar fituatior>, 
 and explained in gentle terms, that he had 
 nothing to depend upon to recommend him 
 to favout in the world, but his perfonal 
 talents and accomplifhments ; giving him 
 to underftand at the fame time, that with 
 a perfcvering and vigorous exertion of thefe, 
 
 he
 
 EDWARD. 163 
 
 he would be more efteemed and more efti- 
 mable than thofe who, ftarting in life with 
 greater advantages, were lefs attentive to 
 the means of improvement. This doctrine 
 funk deep into the boy's mind, young as 
 he was ; and the rapid progrefs he after- 
 wards made in various attainments was 
 probably owing to its influence. Above all, 
 Mrs. Barnet was affiduous to inculcate every 
 principle of religion and virtue of which 
 {he thought his underftanding fufceptible, 
 and without which, ihe aflured him, all 
 other attainments would fail to render him 
 happy, either in this world or the next. 
 
 After fome inftrudicns of this nature, flio 
 faid one day, " Well, my dear, I may rely 
 on your promife, that you will be very di- 
 ligent at fchool ?" 
 
 Edward. Yes, indeed you may. 
 
 Mrs. B. If you fhould deceive me, the 
 lofs will fall on yourfelf. 
 
 Ed. I don't care what falls on myfelf, 
 but I will never deceive you. 
 
 Mrs. B. You are fenfible how fhame- 
 ful it is to break a promife ? (The boy was 
 filent.) 
 
 M 2 Mrs.
 
 164 E D \V A R D. 
 
 Mrs. B. I am perfuadecl you never tell 
 lies? (No anfwer.) 
 
 Mrs. B. What does this mean ? Don't 
 you know that it is a great fault to tell what 
 is not true ? 
 
 Ed. Yes, I have been told fo. 
 
 Mrs. B. Surely then you would not be 
 guilty of it ? (He made no anfwer.) 
 
 Mrs, B. What ! Do you ever tell lies ? 
 
 Ed. Ye Yes, (replied he fobbing,) I 
 do fometimes. 
 
 Mrs. B. I am very forry for it. 
 
 Ed. I am very forry for it too. 
 
 Mrs. B. How came you to be guilty of 
 it then ? 
 
 fid. I never was guilty of it, till I was 
 feverely whipt for acknowledging the truth. 
 
 Mrs. B. But have you not been told 
 that liars go to hell ? 
 
 Ed. Yes, the fchool-mafter of the work- 
 houfe told me fo. 
 
 Mrs. B. Well, was you not -much more 
 afraid of going to hell than of being whipt? 
 
 Ed. No, I was more afraid of being 
 whipt than of going to hell. 
 
 6 Mrs.
 
 EDWARD. t6 5 
 
 Mrs. B. How came that ; for you muft 
 furely know that hell is an infinitely greater 
 punifhment ? 
 
 Ed. Yes, but hell is a long while after 
 this, and the mafter was prepared to whip 
 me inftantly. 
 
 However weak fuch a manner of think- 
 ing may feem, Mrs. Barnet could not be 
 furprifed to find it in a child of his age, 
 particularly as fo many men and women of 
 every age feem to be influenced by the 
 fame kind of reafoning. 
 
 Refuming the converfation, after a (hort 
 paufe, " Indeed, my dear," faid me, " you 
 have acted with great folly and weaknefs : 
 Would you agree to be hanged to-morrow 
 rather than bear a pinch of the ear to-night ? 
 
 Ed. No, I would not. 
 
 Mrs. B. But you did fomething like this, 
 when rather than bear the pain of being 
 whipt, you preferred the rifle of going to 
 hell. 
 
 The boy feemed a little embarraffed by 
 
 this at length, he faid, " At firft, when the 
 
 mafter told me I mould go to hell if I told 
 
 M 3 lies,
 
 1 66 E D \V A R D. 
 
 lies, I believed what he faid, but after- 
 ward I began to doubt it." 
 
 " How could you have any doubts re- 
 garding what your mailer aflured you ?" re- 
 joined he. 
 
 " Becaufe I afterwards difcovered," an- 
 fwered Edward, " that the matter told lies 
 himfelf ; which I thought he would hardly 
 have done, if he had really believed that 
 liars were fent to hell/' 
 
 " That matter is a very bad man, and 
 has fet you an ill example," faid Mrs. Bar- 
 net ; " but now that you are forry for hav- 
 ing been guilty of fuch a mean thing as 
 lying, I hope you will avoid it in future 
 I could not love a liar." 
 
 " I never will tell another lie in all my 
 life," replied he, with vehemence ; " no, 
 not although I were to be whipt a dozen 
 times for telling the truth. " 
 
 " That is a brave boy," faid Mrs. Barnet; 
 " and the way to be loved and refpected." 
 
 The candour he had difplayed in ac- 
 knowledging what he could have fo eafily 
 concealed, increafed the good opinion fhe 
 had of his character, and the affectionate in- 
 
 terca
 
 EDWARD. 167 
 
 tereft (he took in him ; while the wholefome 
 nourimment with which he was fupplied, 
 and the encouragement he received at Mrs. 
 Barnet's houfe, had the happieft effect on 
 his confthudon and looks, and he gained 
 freih vigour and beauty every day. The na- 
 tural indolence and indifference of Mr. Bar- 
 net himielf was gradually overcome by the 
 charms of his countenance and the amufe- 
 ment of his prattle. To allow the growing 
 partiality to take root in the heart of her 
 hufband, Mrs. Barnet found pretexts for 
 poftponing the boy's being fent to fchool : 
 in a fhort time however fhe perceived that 
 it would require as much addrefs to prevail 
 on her hufband to allow him to be boarded out 
 of the houfe, as it had been to induce him 
 to admit the boy into it: Mr. Barnet how- 
 ever agreed, at laft, to let him go ; and fhe 
 informed Edward that he was to leave 
 them the following day. At this news his 
 chearfulnefs forfook him, and he feemed 
 dejeded. 
 
 " Nay," faid Mrs. Barnet ; you muft 
 not look fo forrowful at the thought of go- 
 ing to fchool." 
 
 M 4 " It
 
 i68 E D W A R D. 
 
 " It is not for that," faid he, ready to'cry. 
 
 " If going to fchool makes you look for- 
 rowful, I mall not love you," continued 
 me. 
 
 " I do not look forrowful," cried he ; 
 brufhing the tears haftily from his eyes with 
 the back of his hand, and attempting to 
 fmile in her face. 
 
 " You ought not to be forry to do what 
 is for your good," added me. 
 
 " I will never be forry to do what you 
 choofe," replied he, " whether it is for my 
 good or not."
 
 EDWARD. 169 
 
 CHAP. XIX. 
 
 Et genus, et formam regina pecunia donat; 
 Ac bene nummatum decorat Suadela Venufque. 
 
 HORAT. 
 
 /T-VHE fchool to which Edward was fent 
 had once enjoyed a good reputation, 
 through the merits of the mailer by whom 
 it was eftablifhed : at his death, the widow 
 endeavoured to keep it up by the means 
 of the ufhers; but me foon after married 
 a man grofsly ignorant, and in all re- 
 fpe&s unfit for the office of a fchool- mafter. 
 The fchool however continued to thrive 
 through the ftrength of its former repu- 
 tation. 
 
 Seminaries of learning, as well as parti- 
 cular fhops, are fometimes frequented more 
 on account of what they have been, than 
 what they are: fo many inftances of this 
 might be produced, that it feems to be a 
 prevailing opinion in this Ifland, that talents 
 and genius, like cats, are raore attached to 
 
 particular
 
 170 E D \V A R D. 
 
 particular walls and houfes, than to the per- 
 fons who refide within them. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet was induced to board the boy 
 at this fchool, by the advice of thofe whom 
 fhe confidered as better judges than herfelf. 
 
 Although the head mafter, or rather the 
 undertaker of this fchool, was devoid of fenfe 
 and knowledge, one of the ufhers poflefTed 
 a confiderable lhare of both. Edward fortu- 
 nately was put under his particular care, and 
 was fcon diftinguimed by the quicknefs of 
 his npprehenfion and his affiduity in fludy. 
 Mrs. Barnet was happy to hear accounts 
 of this nature, and ftill 'more, when fhe 
 underftood that he was efteemed and loved 
 by his fchool-fellows. 
 
 After remaining here two or three 
 years, he made a diflinguifhed figure at the 
 public examinations, and never failed to ob- 
 tain one or two of the prizes diftributed on 
 fuch occafions; but he had the misfortune 
 at laft to incur the difpleafure of a perfon of 
 fuch importance, as entirely altered his 
 fituation. 
 
 Lady Lofty, at this time, lived at a villa 
 at no great diftance from this fchool; which 
 
 tempted
 
 EDWARD. i ?I 
 
 tempted her to fend her nephew, Lord Fil- 
 lagree, a boy about two years older than 
 Edward, as a boarder there. The refpe&ful 
 attention paid to this young nobleman by 
 the mafter arid miftrefs, his being fent for 
 every Friday evening, and carried back every 
 Monday morning, in his aunt's chariot, 
 added to his title, gave him an importance 
 among his fchool-fellows, which his difpo- 
 fition and acquirements would not have pro- 
 duced. 
 
 It had been an eftablifhed cuftom with the 
 former mafter of this fchool, to give the 
 boys fome general inftructions every Sun- 
 day, regarding their religious duties and 
 moral conduct. This was thought to have 
 a good effed, and was confidered as one 
 caufe of the profperity of the fchool. The 
 prefent mafter was willing therefore to keep 
 up fuch a profitable inftitution ; and although 
 utterly difqualified for affifting the boys in 
 their other ftudies, he undertook the Sunday 
 lectures himfelf. His method was to make 
 the boys read portions of the Bible ; there he 
 ought to have flopped, or at leaft have bor- 
 rowed the explanation of fome abler com- 
 mentator
 
 172 E D W A R D. 
 
 mentator than himfelf ; but with a felf-con- 
 ceit, which often attends ignorance, he pro- 
 ceeded to afk foolifh queftions, and to make 
 ridiculous remarks on the facred text. 
 
 As when, by the fenfation of hunger, a 
 man in a weakly ftate becomes fenfible that 
 his flomach is empty, it forms a favourable 
 prefumption; fo it is much in favour of him, 
 who labours under a deficiency of know- 
 ledge, to be fenfible of his ignorance. But 
 when a man's ftomach is empty, if he has 
 the fenfation of its being full, he is certainly 
 a good deal out of order: our fchool-mafter 
 laboured under this miftake, refpecting his 
 head ; although uncommonly empty, he, 
 poor man! imagined it remarkably full, 
 which prompted him, as it has done fome 
 others, to comment on the Bible, without 
 making any thing clearer or better under- 
 ftood than it was before, except the ftate of 
 their own underftanding. 
 
 Lord Fillagree, contrary to cuftom, had 
 been left one particular Friday at fchool, 
 owing to his aunt's being on a vifit ; (he was 
 to return however on the Sunday morning, 
 and the fchool being on her way, fhe called 
 
 at
 
 E D AV A R D. 173 
 
 at the time when the mailer was employed 
 in the , pious talk above mentioned. Defir- 
 ous of being witnefg to the fuperiority of 
 her young kinfman over plebeian boys, fhe 
 defired that her prefence might make no 
 interruption, but that the examination might 
 be continued. The mafter, proud of an op- 
 portunity of difplaying his fagacity in com- 
 menting on the fcriptures, gladly aflented. 
 
 Her ladymip being feated, the mafter 
 calkd up the young Lord, and being fenfible 
 that he was apt to blunder, to avoid the 
 probability of leading him aftray, the maf- 
 ter determined to take no new path, but to 
 keep to that which they had frequently trod- 
 den already : in conformity with this refo- 
 lution, he began with the very firft chapter 
 of the Bible. 
 
 " Pray, my Lord," faid the mafter, 
 " does your Lordfhip recollect how long 
 time God took to create the world?" 
 
 " Six days," replied his Lordfhip. 
 
 " Admirably anftvered," faid the mafter ; 
 " and does your Lordfhip recollect what he 
 did on the feventh?" 
 
 "He
 
 174 E D \V A R D. 
 
 " He reded from his work," faid Lord 
 Fillagree. 
 
 " Right, my Lord," cried the matter ; 
 u from which, as I have often informed 
 you, men are mflrucled to reft when their 
 work is finifhed, which otherwife they 
 might neglect to do; for it is a melan- 
 choly truth, that mankind in general are too 
 apt to neglect their mod important duties. 
 Now, my Lord, pray be pleafed to inform 
 me, who was the firft man in the world?" 
 
 <c Adam," replied the youth with quick- 
 nefs, and looking with exultation to his 
 aunt, who fmiled and nodded, by way of 
 confirmation, as if fhe had faid, You have 
 Lit on the very perfon. 
 
 " Very well anfwered indeed, my Lord !" 
 faid the mafter ; " Adam certainly was the 
 very firft man in the whole world ; and 
 what puts this beyond all contraverfy is, 
 that he was created before any other man, 
 woman, or child; therefore none but an 
 Atheift can deny that Adam was the firft 
 man in the world. And pray, my Lord, 
 \vho was the wtfefl man in the world?" 
 
 8 " Eve,"
 
 EDWARD. 17- 
 
 " Eve," replied his Lordfhip, with a tri- 
 umphant air. At which all the boys burft 
 into a loud fit of laughter, which neither the 
 prefence of the countefs, nor the authority of 
 the mafter, bawling filence, could fupprefs 
 for fome minutes; unfortunately Eward r s 
 laugh continued a fecond longer than the 
 reft. 
 
 " Your Lordfhip mlftcok the queftion," 
 faid the mafter, eager to relieve him ; " You 
 imagined, no doubt, that I afked who was 
 the wifeft woman in the world. And to 
 that queftion your anfwer is very accurate, 
 for as Eve was \hejirft woman in the world,, 
 {he muft have been alfo the wifefl^ at that 
 time.'' 
 
 But the young Lord was too much dif- 
 turbed by the laughing, to avail himfelf of 
 this very ingenious hint. 
 
 " No," cried he ; " it was all owing to 
 you yourfelf,. for you put the wrong quef- 
 tion, and afked queftion fifth before quef- 
 tion fourth, fo you did, for here it is,'* 
 (hewing a paper, with which he had pre- 
 vioufly been fupplied, to affift his me- 
 mory :
 
 176 EDWARD. 
 
 mory: " Look there, queftion fourth, e Who 
 was the firft woman in the world ?' anfwer, 
 4 Eve;' but inftead of that, when I ex- 
 pelted queftion fourth, you afked queftion 
 fifth, that you did." 
 
 " Do not cry, my dear," faid Lady Lofty, 
 wiping the tears from his eyes: " You 
 anfwered in the right order, and your mif- 
 take was all owing to the diforder of others, 
 and the impertinent laugh of thefe boys, 
 particularly of that pert jackanapes there," 
 pointing to Edward, " whom, let me tell 
 you, Sir," added ihe, turning to the mafter, 
 " you ought to teach better manners." 
 
 She then withdrew, taking the young 
 Lord with her, and the mafter attended them 
 to the carriage with many apologies and 
 afiurances that his Lordfhip fhould have 
 ample fatisfaction.
 
 EDWARD. 177 
 
 CHAP. XX. 
 
 Non vultus inftantis tyranni 
 
 Mente quatit folida. HOR. 
 
 '"TpHE next day, as foon as his Lordfhip 
 returned, the mafter, in a formal ha- 
 rangue, endeavoured to convince the boys 
 of the indecency of their behaviour ; he then 
 punifhed Edward feverely, becaufe of th 
 peculiar enormity of his, and infifted that 
 each of them fhould aik his Lordftiip's par- 
 don ; a ceremony with which all complied, 
 except Edward ; when it came' to his turn, 
 he faid that having already fuffered one pu- 
 nifhment, he thought it unjuft that he ihould 
 be fubjected to another for the fame crime. 
 
 The mafter told him, that what was now 
 required was not a punifhment, but a repa- 
 ration due to his Lordfhip. 
 
 Edward faid, he confidered it as more 
 fevere than the former, and refufed to com- 
 ply. 
 
 VOL. i, N With
 
 17$ EDWARD. 
 
 With an intemperance of manner, na- 
 tural to the abject-minded when poffefled 
 of power, the mafter infifted on his diredly 
 begging pardon of the young Lord, under 
 pain of being more feverely whipt than he 
 had been already. Edward fteadily refufed. 
 
 The mafter then put his threats in execu- 
 tion ; and as he pofiefled in hardnefs of heart 
 what he wanted in underftanding, he con- 
 tinued the punimment with unprecedented 
 cruelty. Fatigued himfelf, and almoft out 
 of breath, " Now, Sir," faid he to Edward, 
 who had not allowed a groan to efcape 
 him, " what is your determination now ?" 
 
 " Juft what it was," anfwered the boy 
 with firmnefs. 
 
 This anfwer was followed by a bur ft of 
 applaufe from fome of the boys; and the 
 mafter perceiving rage and the fpirit of mu- 
 tiny in their countenances, thought it moft 
 prudent not to pufh any farther a conteft 
 which filled the fpectators with admiration 
 of Edward, and might be attended with dif- 
 agreeable confequences to himfelf. 
 
 It was impofiible for this young Noble- 
 man, not to perceive that from this time 
 
 the
 
 EDWARD. 179 
 
 the generality of the boys behaved to him 
 with a degree of coldnefs and neglect, 
 Which all the pains he took to conciliate 
 their minds, and all the fplendor of his rank, 
 could not entirely overcome, whilft the marks 
 of regard and affection they manifefted to 
 Edward, were too ftrong and too genuine, 
 not to mortify his Lordfhip exceedingly ; 
 but what gave him more uneafmefs than 
 all the reft, was to obferve, that a boy of the 
 name of Clifton, diftinguimed for his fpirit 
 and vivacity ftill more than by the noble 
 family from which he was a defcendant, and 
 the great fortune to which he was heir, had 
 formed a friendfhip with Edward, which 
 he cultivated with redoubled earneftnefs ever 
 fmce his punifhment. 
 
 In the view of ingratiating himfelf with 
 his fchool-fellows, and mortifying Edward, 
 whom he hated, becaufe he was confcious 
 that Edward had fome reafon to hate him, 
 the young Lord defired his aunt to requeft 
 a holiday to the boys, for the purpofe of 
 giving a collation in a Summer Houfe 
 at the end of her garden neareft the 
 K 2 fchool;
 
 i8a EDWARD. 
 
 fchooj ; to which they were all invited, except 
 Edward. 
 
 Clifton, who was a favourite of her Lady- 
 fhip, received a particular invitation; but he 
 refufed to go, noturithftanding the repeated 
 acjvice of the mafter. Clifton, who was about 
 the fame age with Edward, had been acci- 
 dentally abfent from the Sunday examina- 
 tion, but was witnefs to the fcene on the 
 Monday following ; which had excited in 
 his mind, admiration of Edward, hatred of 
 the mafter, and contempt for his Lordfhip. 
 
 When Lady Lofty underftood that Clif- 
 ton was not come with the other boys, (he 
 fent a fre(h meflage. He returned for an- 
 fwer, that he could not accept of her invi- 
 tation, being engaged to pafs the day with 
 his friend Edward. 
 
 Her Ladyfhip was exceedingly exa- 
 perated by this anfwer, which converted 
 all her partiality for Clifton into hatred, and 
 doubled her indignation againft his friend. 
 
 The growing friendmip between Clifton 
 and Edward gave great fatisfaction to Mrs. 
 Barnct ; for (he thought the former a fenfible 
 
 and
 
 EDWARD. 181 
 
 and fpirited boy, and hoped that, from his 
 connections and perfonal influence, he might 
 be of fervice to her ward in his progrefs 
 through life. Clifton had often vifited her, 
 in company with his friend, and happening 
 to call one day in his abfence, he fpoke of 
 him with all the enthufiaftic warmth of 
 youthful friendfhip ; and in the heat of 
 his eulogium, he alluded to the memorable 
 Sunday's examination. 
 
 As Edward himfelf had never mentioned 
 it, Mrs. Barnet did not underftand what he 
 pointed at, which when Clifton perceived, 
 he gave a circumftantiaf account- of the 
 xvhole< in the prefence of her hufband, Mr. 
 and Mrs. Temple, and Mr. Wormwood. 
 They were all (hocked at the narrative ; the 
 two ladies faid, that Edward mould be im- 
 mediately removed from the fchool. Mr; 
 Temple obferved, that it would be right to 
 hear what the mafter had to fay for himfelf, 
 before any other ftep were taken. Mr. 
 Wormwood faid, that fuch a tyrannical 
 blockhead ought to be expofed to public 
 ridicule ; and Mr. Barnet, whofe indignation 
 N 3 was
 
 182 EDWARD. 
 
 was at the higheft, declared that he deferred 
 to be ftarved. 
 
 Mr. Temple went next day, and ftated 
 what he had heard to the mailer. The man 
 was for fome time unable to make any an- 
 fwer ; he at length endeavoured to defend 
 himfelf; faying, " that Edward had been 
 juftly punimed, becaufe it was owing to 
 his indecent laughter that th'e young Lord 
 had been put into confufion, and had made 
 a ridiculous anfwer." 
 
 "Pray, Sir," faid Mr. Temple, "did 
 Edward laugh at your queftion, or at his. 
 Lordfhip's anfwer ?" 
 
 " At the anfwer, to be fure," replied the 
 matter, with more quicknefs than, fore- 
 thought. 
 
 " Really, Sir," refumed Temple, " you 
 feem as incapable of reafoning, as of acting 
 reafonably. Since it was the young Lord's 
 anfwer he laughed at, how could his laugh- 
 ter be the caufe of the anfwer?" 
 
 " How could it?" repeated the mafter in 
 confufion. 
 
 Unlefs,
 
 EDWARD. 183 
 
 w Unlefs," continued Temple, " you mean 
 to aflert that the effect precedes the caufe." 
 
 " I do not pofitively aflert that it does," 
 faid the mafter, hardly knowing what, he 
 was faying. 
 
 *' O ! you do not ?" continued Temple. 
 
 " No, Sir, not always," faid the mafter. 
 
 " Only on extraordinary occafions, I fup- 
 pofe," added Temple. 
 
 " Yes," rejoined the mafter, " only on 
 very extraordinary occafions, fuch a thing 
 might perhaps happen." 
 
 " What might happen ?" faid Temple. 
 
 " That which you juft now remarked, 
 about the effect of the caufe," replied the 
 fchoolmafter. 
 
 Mr. Temple, ftrrugging up his fhoul- 
 ders, demanded Edward's account ; which 
 having paid, he conducted the boy directly 
 to Mr. Barnet's.
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XXL 
 
 Le caprice de notre humeur eft encore plus bizarre 
 . que celui de la fortune. ROCHEPOUCAULT. 
 
 T?DWARI> was received affectionately by 
 Mrs. Earner, and with kindnefs by her 
 hufband ; who, during his confinement to 
 the houfe, found fome amufement in the 
 boy's company; for although Barnet never 
 could undergo the fatigue of reading hitn- 
 felf, yet he could fometimes bear to hear 
 a few pages read by another, and he lift- 
 ened with more patience to the little ftories 
 which Edward felected for his entertain- 
 ment, than he had ever fhewed on like, 
 occafions before; fo 1 that the boy was 
 not only a fource of amufement to Mr. 
 Barnet, but a powerful auxiliary to his 
 wife, in the very difficult tafk of diverting 
 his caprices, and rendering time lefs bur- 
 denfome to him. Mr. Barnet's fondnefs for 
 Edward was attended with one circum- 
 ftance which might have ruined the boy 
 
 entirely;
 
 EDWARD. 18.; 
 
 entirely ; he could not refrain from prefiing 
 him fornetimes after dinner, to drink port 
 wine. One day after Mrs. Barnet left the 
 room, Mr. Wormwood interpofed, when 
 the child was defired to take another glafs, 
 faying it would injure his health. 
 
 " Pprt wine," replied Barnet, " provided 
 it be genuine, can injure the health of no 
 mortal ; but, on the contrary, as I myfelf am 
 a proof, it has a great tendency to promote 
 health" 
 
 " And vivacity," added Wormwood. 
 
 " Very true, coufm Wormwood," faid 
 Barnet, not remarking the irony , *' for I 
 am never in fo good fpirits as after a .certain 
 quantity of port, and I have never been 
 troubled with any co-mplaint fmce I took 
 to port, except the gout, and now and then 
 a fit of indigeftion." 
 
 Wormwood. Do you not think thofe fnf- 
 ficient ? 
 
 Bgrnet. Certainly, Mr. Wormwood ; and 
 more than fufficient : yet they are not owing 
 to port, but to the curfed claret and 1 bur- 
 gundy, -which I drank in my youth ; and 
 the reafon is plain. 
 
 Wormwood.
 
 i86 ED WARD. 
 
 Wormwood. I will thank you for the rea- 
 fon ; for, plain as it is, I cannot fee it. 
 
 Barnct. The reafon is, becaufe they are 
 weaker, and colder on the flomach. 
 
 Wormwood. Thofe then who have con- 
 fined themfelves all their lives to water, 
 ihould have the gout oftener and more 
 feverely than others. 
 
 Barnet. I know nothing about water- 
 drinkers, Mr. Wormood ; I keep no fuch 
 company : but this I do know by experience, 
 that genuine port wine never injured the 
 health of man, woman, or child. 
 
 Wormwood. Your experience can only ,be 
 derived from two of thofe claflesj you can 
 have none as a woman. 
 
 Ear net. True, nor as a child. 
 
 Wormwood. That is not quite fo clear. 
 
 Barnet. It is as clear as day-light ; for I 
 never tafted port until I was twenty- five 
 years of age, 
 
 Wormwood. Many people continue to be 
 children beyond that period, coufm ; and 
 I know one who is a very great child even 
 at your age. 
 
 Mrs.
 
 EDWARD. 187 
 
 Mrs. Barnet happening to return to the 
 room, her hufband faid, <c Mr. Worm- 
 wood pretends that claret is as wholefome 
 as port ; now as you, my dear, are fond of 
 neither, I appeal to you, as an impartial 
 judge, whether you have not obferved that 
 port wine keeps my gout fixed to my feet, 
 and has never allowed it to mount to my 
 head,' 1 
 
 Mrs. Barnet acknowledged that port wine 
 feemed to agree with her hufband better 
 than claret, and fhe thanked Heaven that 
 the gout had never attacked his head. 
 
 " And can you prove to me," faid Mr. 
 Barnet, turning with a triumphant air to 
 Wormwood, " that I mould not have had the 
 gout in my head long ago, if I had drank 
 
 as much of your d d wafhy claret, as I 
 
 have done of port ?" 
 
 " I confefs," replied Wormwood, " that 
 I cannot." 
 
 " Then I would be glad to know," re- 
 fumed Mr. Barnet, " why poor Ned here 
 fhould be prevented from drinking a few 
 glafles of port wine ?" 
 
 7 Mr*.
 
 1 8* E D W A R D. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet now perceiving what had 
 given rife to the difpute, faid to her huf- 
 band, u That although port was unqueftion- 
 ably the propereft wine for people fubjecl 
 to the gout, it might difagree with thofe 
 who were not; if you pleafe therefore, my 
 dear," added fhe, " let Edward abftain from 
 it, until he fhall have had one fit; after which 
 he may drink it as you do, to keep the 
 difeafe from his head." 
 
 After mufing a little, Mr. Barnet an- 
 fwered, " what you fay, my dear, ftandsto 
 reafon," 
 
 About this time, Mr. Temple, who 
 thought very highly of Edward's abilities, 
 recommended a, fchool of eminence to Mrs, 
 Barnet, faying, " It would be a great pity 
 if fuch prcmifing talents were loft for want 
 of proper cultivation." 
 
 Mrs. Barnet was of the fame way of 
 thinking, but as her hufband had fhewn 
 ill-humour when the former fchool accounts 
 were paid, and as fhe knew this new fchool 
 would be much more expenfive, fhe was 
 cautious of propofirig that tjie boy fhould 
 be put to it. 
 
 Mr.
 
 EDWARD. 189 
 
 Mr. and Mrs. Temple faw her delicacy, 
 and agreed to feize the firft opportunity of 
 bringing about what fhe wilhed, without 
 her needing to interfere. 
 
 They were both at breakfaft one day 
 with Mr. and Mrs. Barnet; Edward was 
 likewife prefent ; he had made an ob- 
 fervation or two, which delighted the 
 whole company, but in a particular manner 
 Mrs. Barnet, who, addreffing her hufband 
 after Edward had left the room, faid, " I am 
 fure, my dear, that no action of your life ' 
 ever gave you more pleafure, or indeed does 
 you more credit, than your generous con- 
 duct to that fine boy." 
 
 Mr. Temple. Every body praifes you for 
 it. 
 
 Mr. Barnet. Yes, yes, many will praife, 
 for praife cofts nothing ; but I fancy very 
 few will imitate me. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet. So much the more honour- 
 able for you, my dear. 
 
 Mr. Temfle. I am convinced that the 
 boy will make a moft refpectable figure in 
 life, and do great credit to my brother, pro* 
 vided he be thoroughly well educated. 
 
 9 Mr,
 
 190 EDWARD. 
 
 Mr. Barnet. He is pretty well educated 
 already. 
 
 Mr. 'Temple. Ay, too well in the opinion 
 cf fomc people. 
 
 Mr. Barnet. What people are thofe ? 
 
 Mr. Temple. The people who run about 
 proclaiming that it is folly in you to fend a 
 boy to fchool, to be taught languages for 
 which he can never have any ufe. 
 
 Mr. Barnet. How do they know what 
 wfe he may have for the languages ? 
 
 Mr. Temple. They aflert that you ought 
 to make him a tradefman. 
 
 Mr. Barnet. I do not regard what they 
 aflert. 
 
 Mr. Temple. You muft have fome regard 
 to the world's opinion. 
 
 Mr. Barnet. I do not care fixpence for 
 the world's opinion ; I'll judge for myfelf 
 in this as in every thing elfe. 
 
 Mr. Temple. You cannot prevent the 
 world from judging alfo j and the world 
 laugh at the folly of giving a boy an edu- 
 cation that would fit him for one of the 
 
 learned
 
 EDWARD. i 9I 
 
 teamed profeflions, when you intend to 
 breed him a tradefman. 
 
 Barnet. Perhaps neither you nor the 
 world, for as wife as you think yourfelves, 
 know what I intend to breed him. 
 
 Mr. 'Temple. I hope at leaft you will not 
 think of the law. 
 
 Mr. Barnet. Why not the law, if I 
 choofe it ? 
 
 Mr. Temple. Becaufe the world would 
 blame you very much. 
 
 Mr. Barnet. The world may go and be 
 
 d 'd. Am I to mind its fancies ? It 
 
 may think I ought to breed the boy a cob- 
 ler, for aught 1 know. 
 
 Mr. Temple. Why truly, brother, I am 
 convinced that many people would not cen- 
 fure you fo much as they do, if you were 
 to breed him a cobler. 
 
 Mr. Barnet. Oh, they would not ! They 
 are very obliging, and I fuppofe you alfo ; 
 you would no doubt approve mightily of 
 Edward's being bred a cobler? 
 
 Mr. Temple. Why not ? I have known fe- 
 veral coblers who were very honeft men. 
 
 Mr. Barnet was now wrought up to a 
 
 violent
 
 192 EDWARD. 
 
 violent pafiion, and when this was the cafe 
 he did not mind what heafTerted. And "I," 
 exclaimed he A " have known feveral lawyers 
 who were as honeft men as your coolers." 
 
 Mr. Temple. Have you, indeed ! 
 
 Mr. Barnet. Ay, indeed; and honefterthan 
 your coblers, or your fhoemakers, or even 
 your parfons ; what do you fay to that ? 
 
 Mr. Temple. All I fhall fay, brother, is, 
 that you have been remarkably fortunate in 
 your law acquaintance. 
 
 Mr. Barnet. Fortunate ! why there is no 
 act of parliament I hope againft a, lawyer's 
 being an honeft man. 
 
 Mr. Temple. No, there are fupsrfluous 
 ads enough without that. 
 
 Here Mrs. Barnet thought it right to in- 
 terpofe, faying, " there is no need to deter- 
 mine as yet what profeflion the boy is to be 
 bred to, he has hitherto " 
 
 " You had beft notinterferc,mydear," cried 
 Barnet ; " for you know that I will be led or 
 influenced by no mortal, man, woman, or 
 child ; and I am already determined, in 
 fpite of thofe wife judges who blame my 
 having the boy taught Latin, that he ftiall 
 
 be
 
 EDWARD. 193 
 
 be fent to one of the beft fchools in England, 
 there to learn as much Latin as I pleafe, 
 and neither more nor lefs." 
 
 " More Latin ftill !" cried Mr. Temple. 
 
 " Ay, and Greek too if I think proper; 
 and you may make my compliments to your 
 friend the World," faid Mr. Barnet, " and 
 tell him fo.'* 
 
 " I have heard," Mrs. Temple obfervedj 
 that a man may be a tolerable lawyer with- 
 out much Greek." 
 
 " That rriay be* fifter," rejoined Mr. 
 Barnet ; " but if I choofe that Edward 
 fhould be taught Greek, it is not the world's 
 chattering that fhall prevent it." 
 
 " Drop the fubjeft, my dear," faid Mr. 
 Temple, addreffing his wife, " left you 
 {hould provoke your brother to have the 
 poor boy taught Hebrew.*' 
 
 Mrs. Temple happening to laugh at her 
 hufband's remark^ Barnet's wrath was 
 wound a peg higher. 
 
 " And if I have a mind that he fhould 
 be taught Hebrew, I would be glad to know 
 Who will hinder it ?" faid he. 
 
 " Not I, for one," cried Mr. Temple ; 
 
 u on the contrary, if you are refolved 
 
 VOL. I. o on
 
 194 E D \V A R D. 
 
 on it, I believe I can recommend a Jew 
 for his inftructor, who underftands Hebrew 
 very well." 
 
 " There is nothing wond-erful in that," 
 faid Barnet peevifhly j " fmce Hebrew is the 
 mother-tongue of the Jews." 
 
 " But this Jew will teach it him on rea- 
 fonable terms," replied Mr. Temple ; " for 
 he is an honeft man." 
 
 " You muft allow," faid Mrs. Temple, 
 addrefling her brother, " that there is foine- 
 thing wonderful in that? 
 
 " What is moft wonderful of all," faid 
 Mr. Temple, " is, that your brother fhould 
 dream of the boy's being taught a lan- 
 guage which will be fo ufelefs to him, 
 and one in which there are fo few books 
 written." 
 
 *' It does not become a man of your 
 cloth," replied Barnet, " to fay any thing 
 in disparagement of Hebrew ; you muft al- 
 low that there is, at lead, one good book in 
 that language ; although you, like many 
 other of your brethren perhaps, may not 
 underftand it in the original." 
 
 " I beg, my dear brother," anfwered 
 Temple, with a fmile, " that you will not
 
 E D \V A R D. 19 5 
 
 be fo very fevere ; I only mean to hint that 
 it is impoflible to pafs through life without 
 the world's cenfure." 
 
 " Damn the world and its cenfure both,'* 
 cried Barnet ; " Edward fhall have as com- 
 plete an education as any boy in England, 
 coft what it will, and there is an end of the 
 matter." 
 
 It was no doubt painful to fuch a woman 
 as Mrs. Barnet, to perceive that even in 
 thofe parts of her hufband's conduct which 
 did him moft credit, he always acted from 
 paffion, caprice, OF fome childifh motive ; 
 but fuch was the character of the man. 
 She was content, therefore, to adopt fuch a 
 behaviour as led him to benevolent actions, 
 without regarding his motives. 
 
 A fhort time after this converfation, it 
 was determined that Edward mould be fent 
 to the very fchool that Mr. Temple had re- 
 commended ; and he then told Mr. Barnet 
 that, to prove that he would not join with the - 
 world in blaming his brother-in-law, he in- 
 tended to accompany the boy to the fchool, 
 which he accordingly did; recommending 
 him to the mafter, who was his friend, as 
 02 a boy
 
 196 EDWARD. 
 
 a boy of promifmg talents and an excellent 
 difpofition. This character from Mr. Temple 
 gave an impreffion in favour of Edward, 
 whofe fituation became flill more agreeable 
 foon after, by his friend Clifton coming to 
 the fame fchool. 
 
 The character which Mr. Temple gave 
 him was fully fupported by Edward at this 
 fchool : yet the advantages he reaped, when 
 he returned to Mr. Barnet's in the vacations,. 
 were of more value, perhaps, than all he ac- 
 quired during the reft of the year ; for Mrs. 
 ' Barnet neglected no opportunity of inflilllng 
 honourable principles into his mind. Ed- 
 ward liftened with delight to herinftruction?, 
 not only on account of their being confo- 
 nant to every idea of virtue which he could 
 form, but likewife on account of the love 
 and veneration in which he held his in- 
 ftructreis. 
 
 While fo many things contributed to 
 make Edward's fituation in Mr. Harriet's 
 family pleafant, one circumftance tended to 
 render it difagreeable. Mention has been 
 made of Mr. Barnet's daughter: it was this 
 girl's misfortune to be the darling of her 
 3 father;
 
 EDWARD. 197 
 
 father ; next to ftewed carp, there was no- 
 thing on earth he loved fo much as her. 
 She was a brunette like her mother, and 
 had the fineft black eyes and mod lively 
 look that can be imagined, of courfe, 
 nothing could be more unlike the vacancy 
 of Mr. Barnet's face, than the fprightly 
 looks of his daughter. 
 
 Yet he was often told, by thofe who were 
 inclined to flatter him, that ihe was very 
 like him, which he believed, and believed at 
 the fame time, what he often told her, that 
 flie was the prettied girl in the world. 
 
 Mr. Barnet's extreme indulgence to his 
 daughter, and the compliments he paid to 
 her beauty, gave much vexation to the mo- 
 ther, who dreaded their effects on the tem- 
 per and difpofition of the girl. Mrs. Barnet 
 had earneftly tried to prevail on her hufband 
 to abftain from praifmg the girl's looks, and 
 from gratifying her in whatever fhe fhew- 
 ed any inclination for ; -but all Mrs. Bar- 
 net's endeavours were fruitlefs ; for in 
 praifmg and gratifying his daughter, he gra- 
 tified himfelf, which had more weight with 
 Barnet, than all the remonftrances of his 
 o 3 wife,
 
 198 E D W A R D. 
 
 wife, or than any other confideration. Mrs. 
 Barnet therefore thought herfelf obliged to 
 facrifice the pleafure fhe had propofed te 
 herfelf, of entirely educating and forming 
 the mind of her daughter, and placed her 
 in a boarding fchool in the capital. Al- 
 though Barnet did not quite reliih this plan, 
 he did not long oppofe it ; for, on reflection, 
 he faid, that it flood to rcafon that mothers 
 could not be fuppofed to be able to educate 
 their daughters fo well as thofe women who 
 made a trade of it. 
 
 The fame motive which prompted Mrs. 
 Barnet to fend her daughter to the boarding 
 fchool, determined her in keeping the girl 
 there feveral years : fhe returned however 
 to her father's houfe at certain periods 
 every year, which were alfo the periods in 
 which Edward returned from fchool. He 
 always behaved to her with the refpect due 
 to the child of his benefactors; and endea*- 
 voured, by every honourable means that 
 his young imagination could fuggeft, to de- 
 ferve her regard and acquire her good will, 
 But perceiving the cold manner in which 
 {he received his attentions, and mocked at
 
 EDWARD. 199 
 
 the haughty ftile in which fhe fpoke, when 
 fhe deigned to fpeak to him at all, he fhrunk 
 into a referve and diftance of deportment, 
 very different from what he aflumed to 
 either of her parents. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet obferved fomething of her 
 daughter's haughty manner, and the effect 
 it had on him, although both the young 
 Lady and the boy endeavoured to conceal 
 them from her. 
 
 Being concerned at this, on her daughter's 
 account, Ihe fpoke to her on the fubjecl:, and 
 ended her remonftrance by obferving, that 
 fhe would give an ill impreffion of her 
 own difpofition, by behaving in fuch a 
 manner to anybody, but particularly to one 
 of fo amiable a character as Edward. 
 
 This reproof feemed to increafe the girl's 
 ill will towards him, which broke out in 
 the manner that will appear in the next 
 Chapter. . 
 
 04
 
 200 EDWARD, 
 
 CHAP. XXII. 
 
 Difcourage cunning in a child j cunning is the ape of 
 wifdom. LOCKE. 
 
 TV/TRS. Barnet had received a prefent of a 
 beautiful piece of china, which fhe va- 
 lued above its real worth on account of the, 
 perfon who gave it. 
 
 It was placed with other pieces of china 
 on a chimney piece in the drawing room j 
 and Mrs. Barnet often gave directions, par- 
 ticularly to her daughter, that it fhould not 
 be removed from its place. 
 
 One forenoon during the Summer vaca- 
 tion, Edward fat in this room reading, when 
 Mifs Barnet entered with Mifs Fuller, ano- 
 ther young Lady, to whom flie wifhed to 
 {hew this fine piece of china. 
 
 Unmindful of her mother's injunction, 
 " I will bring it to the window," faid Mifs 
 Barnet to her companion, " and then you 
 will fee it better." 
 
 " Pray,
 
 EDWARD. 201 
 
 " Pray, Mifs Louifa, be careful not to let 
 it fall," faid Edward ; " for you know it 
 would make your mamma fo uneafy." 
 
 " That is no bufmefs of yours," faid Mifs 
 Barnet, tartly; and at the fame inftant fhe 
 feized the china with fuch quicknefs and fo 
 little caution, that it dipt from her fingers 
 and was broken to pieces on the hearth. 
 
 They all flood for fome time in filent 
 aftonifhment; but fhe who had occafioned 
 the misfortune was the firft who recovered 
 her prefence of mind. 
 
 ' c Were we all to cry our eyes out," faid 
 Mifs Barnet, " it would not mend the vafe ; 
 but I have thought of what will fave us from 
 blame." 
 
 She immediately ran out of the room, 
 and returning a few minutes after with a 
 cat in her arms ; " Be gone into the gar- 
 den," faid flie to the young Lady and Ed- 
 ward ; then throwing the cat on the floor, 
 {he fhut the door of the room, and followed 
 them into the garden. " Now," cried Mifs 
 Barnet, ready to burft with laughter, " my 
 mother will think her favourite cat has 
 
 broken
 
 E D \V A R D. 
 
 broken the vafe and, if fhefhould make 
 any farther inquiry, you have only to de- 
 clare, as I fhall do," added fhe, looking at 
 Edward, " that you know nothing at all of 
 the matter." 
 
 " I hope," faid he, " that your mother 
 will afk no queftions of me on the fubject." 
 
 " But in cafe fhe fhould, you will tell her 
 plainly, that you know nothing about it ?" 
 
 Edward made no anfwer. 
 
 " You will tell her that you know nothing 
 of the matter ?" repeated Mifs Barnet, witU 
 a raifed voice. 
 
 " I will tell her no fuch thing," faid Ed- 
 ward calmly. 
 
 " Why not?" cried (he. 
 
 " Becaufe, I will not tell a lie," anfwered 
 he. 
 
 " Do you mean to fay that 7 would?" 
 
 " I meant to fay what I repeat, Mifs 
 Louifa," replied Edward ;" that for my own 
 part I will not." 
 
 " Did you ever fee fuch a faucy compa- 
 nion ?" faid Mifs Barnet to Mifs Fuller, as 
 be withdrew. 
 
 " O!
 
 EDWARD. 203 
 
 " O ! yes, very often, my dear," replied 
 the other, fmiling. 
 
 " Well, you may laugh as you pleafe," 
 rejoined Mifs Barnet, " but what he laid 
 implied that he thought me a liar.'* 
 
 " What he thinks, my dear Louifa, is 
 of little importance," replied Mifs Fuller; 
 " provided we are ourfelves confcious that 
 we are incapable of falfehood." 
 
 At this remark, Mifs Barnefs face became 
 of the deepeft fcarlet. 
 
 When Mrs. Barnet returned to the draw- 
 ing room, me faw her favourite vafe lying 
 in pieces on the hearth. The cat rumed out 
 as foon as the door was opened ; but as Mrs. 
 Barnet had left Edward reading in the 
 room, and was certain that no cat was there 
 when me left it, ihe could not avoid fuf- 
 pecting that he had accidentally broken the 
 vafe, and had afterwards fhut up the cat in 
 the room to prevent the fufpicion from fall- 
 ing on himfelf. This betrayed a degree of 
 cunning which me did not like, and of which 
 me had never before feen any inftance in 
 him. She was fenfible that to fome people 
 a trick of that kind would appear only a 
 1 5 proof
 
 204 EDWARD. 
 
 proof of clevernefs in a boy of his age; 
 but fhe had hitherto confidered him as fu- 
 perior to a device of this nature) and fhe 
 felt, that if it were clear that he had ftooped 
 to ufe it, fhe never would be able to efteem 
 and love him as fhe had done. And fo 
 painful is it to a benevolent mind, to have 
 favourable impreflions of any one removed, 
 and to receive unfavourable ones in their 
 place, that Mrs. Barnet would much rather 
 have loft the value of a hundred fuch vafes, 
 than have had her good opinion of this 
 poor boy thus diminifhed. She gathered 
 up the fragments of the vafe, and locked 
 them, in her cupboard, without making any 
 inquiry. At dinner fhe remarked that Ed- 
 ward was graver and more penfive than 
 ufual,. which increafed her fufpicions. 
 
 She faid nothing all that day, in the 
 hopes that he would fpontaneoufly acknow- 
 ledge what he had done. She contrived 
 opportunities of being alone with him, and 
 behaved in the moft affectionate manner ; 
 addreffirrg him even with more franknefs 
 and affability than ufual, on purpofe to 
 imooth the way to the avowal which fhe fo 
 
 much
 
 EDWARD. 205 
 
 much defired ; and at night fhe retired 
 to her bed-chamber chagrined becaufe he 
 had not made it, and vexed at thinking 
 this poor friendlefs boy lefs worthy of her 
 efteem than fhe had formerly imagined. 
 
 Next day being alone with him, fhe faid 
 a little unexpectedly, " Pray, Ned, do you 
 know any thing of the breaking of the vafe 
 which flood on the drawing room chim- 
 ney?" 
 
 Unwilling to tell what he knew, and con- 
 fufed with the queftion, he made no anfwer. 
 
 His uneafmefs and confufiori confirmed 
 her fufpicions. 
 
 " When I left you reading in the room 
 the vafe was whole, was it not ?" faid fhe. 
 
 " Yes it was," anfwered he. 
 
 " You were alone," refumed fhe ; " there 
 was ?iot fo much as a cat in the ro,om with 
 you when I left it," added fhe. 
 
 Greatly diftrefied at this remark, the boy 
 feemed more and more confuted. 
 
 " Accidentally breaking a piece of china," 
 continued Mrs. Barnet, " is a trifle; the 
 means which feem; to have been ufed to 
 conceal it, I view in a different light, and it 
 
 gives
 
 206 E D W A R D. 
 
 gives me pain to think that thofe I love are 
 capable of artifices which betray cunning 
 at the expence of candour." 
 
 Edward wiped the tears from his eyes, 
 but faid nothing. 
 
 " I thought you too wife and manly tc 
 be cunning," continued Mrs. Barnet. 
 The boy feemed much diftrefTed, 
 " Perhaps,'* refumed Mrs. Barnet ; " you 1 
 \vifh to give ibme explanation of this mat- 
 ter/* 
 
 ** I can give no explanation,*' faid he, in 
 a voice half iuppretled with anguifh ; " but 
 but Oh ! I am very unhappy.'* 
 
 " Nay, my dear," faid Mrs. Barnet, moved 
 by the diftrefs in which he faw the boy j 
 " there is no need to be very unhappy ; it 
 was natural for you to imagine I fhould be 
 mneafy at the lofs of the vafe, and you could 
 not bear, I fuppofe, to be thought the caufe 
 of my uneafmefs. I am fure fuch a thought 
 would give you pain." 
 
 u Indeed it would," faid he, in a voice 
 hardly articulate. 
 
 " When fuch an accident happens again, 
 believe me, rr.y dear, your beft courfe wiff 
 
 be
 
 EDWARD. 207 
 
 be to avow it honeftly, without racking 
 your invention for devices to conceal it." 
 
 Having faid this, Mrs. Barnet left him 
 in more uneafmefs of mind than he had 
 ever felt before. 
 
 Notwithftanding the palliating terms me 
 had made ufe of, Edward faw that Mrs. 
 Barnet was much difpleafed ; and it coft 
 him a fevere flruggle to bear the idea of 
 her difpleafure ; but when he reflected 
 that he could not do himfelf juflice with- 
 out accufing the daughter of his bene- 
 fadrefs, and conveying to the mother's 
 breaft more vexation than {he felt in think- 
 ing him blame-worthy, he determined to 
 remain filent, and actually returned to fchool 
 without giving the leaft hint on the fub-
 
 208 E D W A R II. 
 
 CHAP. XXIIL 
 
 Virtue itfelf 'fcapes not calumnious ftrokes ; 
 The canker galls the infants of the fpring, 
 Too oft before their buttons be difclofed, 
 And in the morn and liquid dew of youth 
 Contagious blafhnents are moil imminent. 
 
 SHAKE SPEARS* 
 
 T\ yriss Barnet remained a month with her 
 *** parents after Edward left them ; her 
 refentment againft him increafed, he had 
 made her look mean in her own eyes. She 
 felt therefore a difagreeable fenfation as 
 often as his name was mentioned. When 
 this is the cafe, few have the candour 
 to confider whether it originates in any 
 fault of their own, or of the perfon at the 
 mention of whofe name the difagreeable 
 feeling recurs perhaps Mifs Barnet wag 
 incapable, coolly and confiderately, of doing 
 an effential injury to this boy ; but the 
 painful fenfation which fhe felt when fhe 
 thought of him, made her without defign 
 
 fpeak
 
 E D W A R D. 209 
 
 fpeak of him fometimes in an injurious ftile, 
 and at one time in the hearing of her 
 mother. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet hinted at the unfairnefs of 
 taking advantage of his abfence to infmuate 
 any thing to his prejudice ; adding, that Ed- 
 ward was incapable of fpeaking againft peo- 
 ple in their abfence. 
 
 " What is nearly as bad, however," re- 
 plied the daughter ; " he is capable of 
 fpeaking with infolence and injuflice to 
 people in their prefence" 
 
 " Edward is as incapable of the one as the 
 other," faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " He told me the other day, in pretty 
 plain terms, that I was a liar," faid the 
 daughter. 
 
 Mifs Barnet guefling by her mother's 
 look that (he did not believe her, faid, 
 " Mifs Fuller was prefent when he did fo." 
 
 Some vifitors being at the inftant an- 
 nounced, the dialogue between the mother 
 and daughter ended. 
 
 Although Mrs. Barnet did not immediately 
 refume the fubjecl of this converfation with 
 
 VOL. i. p her
 
 2 io E D W A R D. 
 
 her daughter, fhe refolved to inveftigate 
 the truth of the accufation ; and for that 
 purpofe, after making a vifit to a family in 
 the neighbourhood, fhe called one forenoon 
 on Mifs Fuller, who had returned to her 
 father's houfe, and afked whether fhe had 
 ever heard Edward fay any thing unbe- 
 coming to Louifa. The young lady declared 
 fhe never had. " He may have been pro- 
 voked tp it," refumed Mrs. Barnet, " but 
 I have reafon to think he behaved with 
 fome degree of infolence in your prefence." 
 Mifs Fuller now recollected what had pafled 
 when the vafe was broken, and related the 
 whole candidly as it had pafled. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet's mind was now divided be- 
 tween admiration of Edward's conduct and 
 uneafmefs on account of her daughter's ; 
 but, eager to remove from the heart of Ed- 
 ward that pain which her miftaken notion of 
 his conduct had produced, fhe gave way, in 
 the firft place, to the moft pleafmg emotion 
 of the two, and immediately after arriving at 
 her own houfe, fhe wrote to him as fol- 
 lows : 
 
 "My
 
 EDWARD. 211 
 
 " My dear Edward, 
 " You have reafon to be hurt at the ftyle 
 in which I fpoke to you a little before you 
 left us, and perhaps it ftill gives you pain to 
 think that I difapprove of any part of your 
 conduct, even while you are confcious that 
 my difapprobation proceeds from miftake ; 
 I haften therefore to inform you, that the 
 miftake, which, from the moft honourable 
 and delicate motives, you left me in, exifts 
 no longer. I am fully acquainted with 
 every particular of the affair to which you 
 muft know I now allude ; the whole of your 
 behaviour, on that occafion, and your mo- 
 tives for not explaining it to me, are now 
 evident, and render you dearer to me than 
 ever. 
 
 " From the pleafure you now feel you 
 will be confirmed in the truth of what I have 
 often told you, that the approbation of a 
 perfon's own mind is the nrft reward for 
 acting honourably ; and future experience 
 will convince you, that fuch conduct, to ufe 
 the words of a man of great wit and ^reat 
 good fenfc, 
 
 p 2 Itaves
 
 E D W A R D, 
 
 . leaves behind 
 
 A lading pleafure in the mind, 
 Which, by remembrance, will affuage- 
 Grief, ficknefs, poverty, and age; 
 And ftrongly (hoot a radiant dart 
 To fhine through life's declining part. 
 
 That you may perfevere in that virtuous 
 courfe which alone leads to happinefs here, 
 and fecures it hereafter, is the prayer of, dear 
 Edward, your aflured friend, 
 
 " JANE BARNET." 
 
 This letter operated like a cordial on the 
 drooping fpirits of Edward, who had begun 
 fcveral letters containing general afTurancea 
 of his not being fo much to blame as fhe 
 might believe ; but ftill dreading that they 
 might lead to a difcovery of Mifs Barnet's be- 
 haviour, which he knew would give vexa- 
 tion to her mother, he ended by throwing 
 each letter in the fire. 
 
 After Mrs. Barnet had gratified her na- 
 tural difpofition to redrefs an injury, and 
 communicate pleafure by writing to Ed- 
 ward, fhe remembered that the painful duty 
 of remonftrating with her daughter re- 
 
 mained
 
 EDWARD. 213 
 
 mained unfulfilled. Afraid, however, of the 
 effect which ftating her conduct in the 
 heinous light which it appeared to herfelf 
 might have on the young lady's mind, me 
 fpoke to her in the following terms : 
 
 " I find, my dear, that you entirely miftook 
 what Edward faid, when you defired him to 
 conceal from me the accident by which the 
 vafe was broken. It was not unnatural, 
 however, in you, to be provoked with any 
 expreffion that could poffibly be conflrued 
 into fo foul a reproach as that of lying- 
 the mifapprehenfion of a fentence has often 
 led people of the beft difpofitions and inten- 
 tions into error ; for, on a very narrow ban's 
 of miftake, a vaft ftructure of falfehood may 
 be raifed to the ruin of the moft meritorious 
 character. The quicknefs of your temper, 
 my dear Louifa, led you into an error, in 
 repeating to me what Edward faid, which 
 might have made an impreflion highly in- 
 jurious to his character, had it not been 
 prevented by my obtaining a real ftate of 
 what pafled from your friend Mifs Fuller, 
 who is fo partial to you as to take the whole 
 p 3 blame
 
 214 E D W A R D. 
 
 blame of breaking the vafe on herfelf, de- 
 claring that it proceeded from her impatient 
 curiofity to fee it, and your eagernefs to 
 gratify her. The lofs of the vafe, however, 
 gives me little or no uneafmefs ; but had it 
 given me a great deal, it would have been 
 entirely difperfed by the fatisfaction of find- 
 ing that Edward has not behaved in the 
 manner that ftruck you, and that you are 
 incapable of wilful m ifreprefentation." 
 
 Had Mrs. Barnet ftated her daughter's 
 conduct in the worft light, the young lady 
 was of a temper to have attempted a jufti- 
 fication ; and what we once are led, or 
 provoked to juftify, we are apt to repeat : 
 whereas, inftead of attempting any defence 
 or apology, Mifs Barnet was fo much af- 
 fected with the delicacy of her mothe'r's 
 remonftrance, that me ftood fpeechlefs, with 
 her eyes fixed on the ground, which Mrs. 
 Barnet obferving, gently fqueezed her hand 
 and left the room. Mifs Barnet was no 
 fooner alone than fhe burft into tears, 
 and continued weeping for a confiderable 
 time. 
 
 Her
 
 EDWARD. 215 
 
 Her heart informed her, that her con- 
 dud: did not deferve the palliations it had 
 received ; and although nothing pleafed her 
 fo much, in general, as her mother's praife, 
 yet, on the prefent occafion, it rather dif- 
 trefled her, becaufe fhe was confcious fhe 
 did not deferve it.
 
 2i6 ' EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XXIV. 
 
 A fmile eternal on his lip he wears, 
 
 Which equally the wife and worchlefs /hares. 
 
 In gay fatigues, this moft undaunted chief, 
 
 Patient of idlenefs beyond belief, 
 
 Moft charitably lends the town his face, 
 
 For ornament in every public place ; 
 
 As fare as cards, he to th' aflembly comes, 
 
 And is the furniture of drawing-rooms. 
 
 YOUNG. 
 
 continued to purfue his fludies 
 with the approbation of his matters, and 
 with equal fuccefs and tranquillity, till his 
 old enemy Fillagree was placed at the lame 
 fchool. 
 
 This youth had remained at the former 
 for a confiderable time after Clifton and 
 Edward had left it ; and, by the abject con- 
 nivance of the matter, had domineered over 
 the other boys without control, to the great 
 augmentation of his native ftock of arro- 
 gance, which, indeed, was the only acquifi- 
 tion he made. He was now fent by Lady 
 Lofty to this new feminary. 
 
 As
 
 EDWARD. 217 
 
 As Earl Torpid, father to Lord Fillagree, 
 was ftill in exiftence, it is incumbent on us to 
 account for the youth being fo much at the 
 difpofal of his aunt, at a period of his life 
 when the character is fuppofed to receive its 
 deepeft and mod permanent impreffions ; 
 and in performing this talk, it will be ne- 
 ceflary to give a few anecdotes refpefting 
 other branches of this illuftrious family. 
 
 Lord Torpid was thought as polite a 
 nobleman as any about court j there was a 
 bowing, fmiling attentivenefs in his manner, 
 which thofe, who were ignorant that it was 
 the effecT: pf mere habit, miftcok for an in- 
 dication of good will. Lord Torpid was 
 incapable of doing a rude thing ; but a corn 
 on his own toe gave him more concern than 
 the greateft misfortune that could befal any 
 of his acquaintance, including thofe he 
 called his friends. He patted his time at 
 court, at the opera, at concerts, in loung- 
 ing, and at his toilet. He was vifited twice a 
 week by a dentift, who had the fuperintend- 
 ence of his teeth ; an operator for the nails 
 regularly infpedled thofe of his Lordfhip's 
 fingers and toes as often. It was obferved, 
 
 that
 
 2i8 EDWARD. 
 
 that on the remaining three days of the 
 week the noble Lord was much at a lofs 
 what to do with himfelf, when the hour 
 arrived which thofe different artifts were in 
 life to occupy. 
 
 It was obferved above, that he was in ex-* 
 iftence at the period of which we have been 
 treating. This, indeed, is the utmoft that 
 could be faid at any period of his life, and 
 more than a cautious perfon would have ven- 
 tured to affirm at fome particular times, when 
 he feemed to have as little feeling as a corpfe. 
 This was peculiarly obfervable at the play-* 
 houfe, for, although he never went till the play 
 was ended from tafte, he was fometimes ob^ 
 liged to attend before it began from duty ; 
 and there he contemplated Mrs. Siddons in 
 Belvidera and Lady Randolph with the fame 
 compofure that he heard the lullaby of Lord 
 in the Koufe of Peers. His friends 
 
 endeavoured to explain this, by faying that 
 his Lordfhip, like many other refpe&able 
 people, had no relifh for tragedy. And 
 when it afterwards appeared that he was 
 equally unmoved with the genuine nature 
 and exquifite pleafantry of Mrs. Jordan, 
 
 they
 
 EDWARD. 219 
 
 they were forced to add, that his Lordfliip 
 alfo refembled thofe refpe&able people who 
 have no relifh for comedy. 
 
 At an early period of his life he was 
 greatly influenced by what was called Ton ; 
 fo much indeed as in the important ftep of 
 marriage, to overpower his love of money, 
 which afterwards became his ftrongeft paf- 
 fion. As every Englishman, with the title of 
 Lord, communicates that of Lady to his 
 wife, he of courfe has it in his power to 
 acquire fortune by marriage if he pleafes. 
 The greater number of Englifh Lords, in- 
 cluding the Scotch and Irim, certainly avail 
 themfelves of this advantage. Lord Tor- 
 pid, however, did not ; which remains to be 
 accounted for. 
 
 A handfome young lady, the daughter of 
 a gentleman of moderate fortune and a nu- 
 merous family, was prefented at court. As 
 fhe was genteelly connected, me was foon in- 
 troduced into all the famionable circles ; her 
 gaiety and good humour were fuperior to 
 her beauty; her manners were peculiarly 
 pleafmg, and fhe was more admired by the 
 men, and imitated by the women, than any 
 
 woman
 
 E D W A R D. 
 
 woman in England. Lord Torpid, who 
 was acquainted with the family, had often 
 feen her at her father's houfe, before Ihe 
 appeared at court, without taking any parti- 
 cular notice of her ; indeed his Lordfhip 
 never admired any thing till it became the 
 admiration of others. The torrent of praife 
 which flowed on this young lady directed 
 his Lordfhip's peculiar attention to her. One 
 day, at the drawing-room, he heard a very 
 great Perfonage declare, that fhe was one of 
 the prettieft girls in England. He faw the 
 furrounding circle, by their bows, nods, 
 and fmiles, announce that they were all of 
 the fame opinion. That very evening, 
 Lord Torpid fell afleep in the conviction 
 that he was defperately in love with her ; 
 and the next day he informed her father of 
 his paflion, and made the daughter an offer 
 of his hand. 
 
 Of all this young lady's male acquaint- 
 ance Lord Torpid was precilely the perfon 
 who interefted her the leaft ; but (he was of 
 an eafy and complying temper. All her re- 
 lations allured her, that Lord Torpid's pro- 
 pofal was the moil fortunate thing that could 
 
 have
 
 EDWARD. 22J 
 
 have happened to her family, and that fhe 
 herfelf would be perfectly happy, becaufe 
 fhe would have all that the world can afford. 
 Her father left her entirely to follow her 
 own inclination ; and as fhe had a great in- 
 clination to be a Countefs, fhe followed the 
 advice of her relations, and accepted his 
 Lordfhip's offer. A little after his mar- 
 riage, Lord Torpid began to fufpect that he 
 had laboured under a miftake in thinking 
 himfelf in love, and he was fully convinced, 
 that however deeply he had been in it, he 
 was now completely out of it ; and his 
 lady was equally convinced, that her re- 
 lations had been miftaken in thinking that 
 this marriage would make her happy ; 
 and however fond fhe herfelf had been of 
 the title of Countefs, fhe now thought fhe 
 had bought it at a price far above its value. 
 When fhe married, her hufband was an 
 objecl: of indifference to her. This ftate, 
 which lafted about a month, might have 
 been called the honey-moon, when com- 
 pared with what followed. The young lady 
 had pafled her life, before fhe became a 
 
 Countef?,
 
 22 E D W A R D. 
 
 Countefs, in gaiety and good humour, moftly 
 in the -country, at the houfe of her father, 
 or at the houfes of his friends, fond of her 
 companions, and greatly beloved by them 
 all, on account of her eafy, gay, and accom- 
 modating difpofition. The infipid folemnity 
 of her hufband damped the natural chearful- 
 nefs of her heart. The languid monotony of 
 his converfation ; the repetition of the fame 
 frigid phrafes benumbed her defire of pleaf- 
 ing, and her power of attention. Her vi- 
 vacity forfook her ; fhe fell into low fpirits; 
 they increafed towards the end of her preg- 
 nancy, and fhe died eight days after fhe had 
 been delivered of Lord Fillagree. Although 
 Lord Torpid was certainly not a paflionate 
 lover of women, he loved children Hill lefs ; 
 he often faid, that all children were bores, 
 and that a man's own children were greater 
 bores than any other. Lord Torpid, befides 
 one brother confiderably younger than him- 
 felf, had two fillers. One of the latter had 
 tnade an imprudent marriage in point of 
 circumftances ; and his Lordfhip, who had 
 taken little notice of her before her marriage, 
 took none after it. He feemed as little inte- 
 
 rcftcd
 
 EDWARD. 223 
 
 retted about his other fitter, until he under- 
 ftood that {he was courted by Lord Lofty, 
 a peer of great fortune, and feventy years 
 of age. Lord Torpid then waited on her, and 
 perceiving that fhe was rather averfe to the 
 match, he obferved, that it was natural for 
 her to feel repugnant on fuch an occafion ; 
 but that fhe ought to confider that what was 
 difagreeable in the bufmefs would be fhort- 
 lived, and what was advantageous would be 
 permanent ; for he was convinced Lord 
 Lofty could not live above one year. 
 
 This overcame his fitter's repugnancy ; 
 Ihe gave her hand to Lord Lofry; he de- 
 clared himfelf the happieft of men, and 
 furvived his happinefs three months and 
 one night. His fortune and title defcend- 
 ed to a fon by a former marriage. Lady 
 Lofty was left an ample jointure, and a 
 confiderable fum in ready money. As her 
 hufband's relations had little or no connec- 
 tion with her after his death, me was in- 
 clined to renew her intimacy with her bro- 
 ther, which had been interrupted for fomc 
 time. Meeting him one evening at a con- 
 cert, {he enquired after his fon ; my Lord 
 4 informed
 
 224 E D \V A R D. 
 
 informed her, that he had not feen him fof 
 a week paft, becaufe the child had been ill of 
 a fever, which ftill continued, but he under- 
 ftood that the phyfician thought him better ; 
 he therefore took it for granted that he 
 would recover. 
 
 Lady Lofty was proceeding to make far- 
 ther enquiries concerning the child, but his 
 Lordfhip begged (he would fufpend her cu- 
 riofity till another opportunity, as the mufi- 
 cians were juft about to begin. 
 
 Her ladyfhip called the following day to 
 fee her nephew. She found him not entire- 
 ly out of danger. She earneftly recom- 
 mended a tea-fpoonful of the fyrup of 
 violets to be given to the child every four 
 hours, fhakingthe phial, which me faid had 
 faved her own life. The phyfician made 
 DO objection to this prefcription. The child 
 was fomewhat better the next dar, and gra- 
 dually recovered. The phyfician did not 
 difpute the merit of this cure with her 
 Ladyfhip, and from that time fhe feemed 
 every day fonder of her nephew. Some 
 imagined that her partiality proceeded 
 wholly from the pieafing reflection that fhe 
 i ; had
 
 E D W A R D. 225 
 
 had faved his life ; others imagined that it 
 was partly owing to his hair being of a 
 fiery red, which was alfo the colony of her 
 Ladyfhip's ; fhe herfelf indeed called it au- 
 burn ; and Ihe turned off a favourite maid, 
 whom fhe overheard faying, that the hair 
 of both her lady and the child was juft as. 
 auburn as a carrot. But whatever this par- 
 tiality of Lady Lofty proceeded from, it was 
 fo great that fhe propofed to take the boy 
 home to her own houfe, and to be at the 
 entire expence of his education a propofal 
 that was joyfully agreed to by Lord Torpid. 
 
 One of Lady Lofty 's favourite topics of 
 converfation, after fhe took young Fillagree 
 under her peculiar care, was the refemblance 
 (lie found between the chara&er and difpo- 
 fition of the young Lord, and what was 
 recorded of fome of the moft celebrated of 
 his anceftors ; for her Ladyfhip was deeply 
 read in the hiftory of Jier own family, and 
 particularly well acquainted with the mar- 
 riages of all the different branches, wjiich 
 indeed was the moft memorable of their 
 exploits for the laft century. 
 
 VO;L. i, Q, Although
 
 226 E D \V A R D. 
 
 Although young Filiagree had not all the 
 penetration that his aunt imagined, he had 
 enough to difcover the power he had over 
 her affections, which he exerted to pro- 
 cure whatever he took a fancy for. She, 
 on her part, took pleafure in gratifying his 
 defires ; but they became fo unreafonable, 
 that {he fometimes hefitated. Whenever 
 this was the cafe, the young Lord fell into 
 fuch violent fits of crying and fobbing, as 
 terrified her into compliance, left he fhould 
 fall into convulfions, orburft a- blood veflel. 
 On thefe occafions Lady Lofty informed 
 her confidential friends, that in this her 
 nephew followed the example of his grand- 
 father, who, fhe underftood, had been 
 fubjecl: to crying and fobbing all his life- 
 time, and yet had made a diftinguifhed 
 figure, 'as one of the Lords of the Bed- 
 chamber, in the reign of George the Firft. 
 
 Young Lord Filiagree was alfoapt to take 
 fancy for every tame animal, bird, or beaft, 
 that he threw his eyes on, and oblige his 
 aunt to purchafe them, much contrary to 
 her own inclination ; fo that her houfe in 
 the country was made a kind of menagerie. 
 
 Her
 
 EDWARD. 227 
 
 Her only confolation was, that in this he 
 united the taftes of his great-uncle the Go- 
 nernor, who was fo fond of dogs, that he 
 always flept with two or three in the room 
 with him ; and of her own grandmother, 
 who bad the fame predilection for cats. 
 
 When crying and fobbing had been fo 
 often ufed, that they began to fail in their 
 effects, the bey tried other ways and means 
 of extorting what he wifhed for : having 
 feen a repeating watch of peculiar con- 
 ftruclion and high price in the pofTefTion of 
 a gentleman who dined one day with his 
 aunt, he extorted one of the fame kind 
 from her, by threatening to go out in a 
 frofty morning without a great coat. He 
 obliged her to purchafe a horfe for him at 
 an extravagant price, as the only condition 
 on which he would abftain from going a 
 fifhing in rainy weather. The capricious 
 tyranny of the boy's temper augmented, as 
 is ufuai, by being indulged ; and while he 
 refufed to make the leaft facrifice of his 
 own taftes or humour on any confideration, 
 he feemed to expect that all around him 
 fhould accommodate to his. A few days 
 Q_ 2 befor
 
 228 E D W A R D. 
 
 before Fillagree went to the new fchool, 
 his father, who had not feen him above two 
 or three times fmce Lady Lofty had taken 
 him under her management, happened to 
 call at her houfe in the country ; he had a 
 gentleman who was related to the family 
 in the carriage with him ; they ftaid to dine 
 with her Ladyfhip, and were rather inclined 
 to remain till next day; but feveral pretty 
 ftrong inftances of the difpofition above 
 mentioned were exhibited by young Fillagree 
 during dinner. In Lord Torpid they occa- 
 fioned no emotion ; but the gentleman 
 feemed fomewhat furpiifed at the boy's 
 petulance. Lady Lofty, remarking this, faid, 
 " I have always made it a rule not to check 
 any thing that indicated fpirit in my ne- 
 phew ; our's has always been diftinguifhed 
 as a high-minded family, and your fon, my 
 Lord, at different times, exhibits flrokes of 
 character, which are fometimes miftaken 
 for caprices, but are in reality indications of 
 his pofleffing the diflinguifhing virtues of 
 many of hrs anceftors. To go no farther 
 back than cur great great grandfather, 
 
 The
 
 EDWARD. 229 
 
 The Earl, who had before begun to wifh 
 to be gone, and now dreaded that he would 
 be entangled in the thread of the large clew 
 of family anecdote, which he faw his fifter 
 ready to unwind, fuppreffing a yawn, faid, 
 " I vow to God, my dear fifter, I am al- 
 ready convinced of all you were going to 
 
 " You may be convinced, brother," faid 
 Lady Lofty, " but I queftion whether this 
 gentleman is." 
 
 " Upon my honour," faid the gentleman, 
 " I am every bit as much convinced as his 
 Lordfhip." 
 
 " If you are both convinced," replied 
 Lady Lofty, greatly difappointed, "no more 
 need be faid." 
 
 " Not a word more, my dear fifter," re- 
 joined Lord Torpid, ringing the bell ; after 
 which he ordered his carriage, and fet out 
 with his companion for London. 
 
 When they had proceeded a little way, 
 the gentleman hinted the efFed which her 
 Ladyfhip's indulgence might have on the 
 character of Lord Fillagree. 
 
 Q^ 3 "I have
 
 230 ED \V A R D. 
 
 " I have little doubt," faid Lord Torpid, 
 " of her making him one of the m oft ca- 
 pricious whelpb in England." 
 
 *' How then can you permit him to re- 
 main with her another hour?" 
 
 " For this good reafon," replied his Lord- 
 ihip ; " that it faves me a great deal of trou- 
 ble and a good deal of expence ; and me, 
 on the contrary, is fond of working on the 
 rough materials of which Fillagree's cha- 
 racter is compofed. 
 
 " And fo," rejoined the gentleman, 
 " your Lordfhip has configned your foQ 
 into her hands, 
 
 to develope, if fhe can, 
 
 And hew the block off, and get out the man," 
 
 " Exa&ly fo," faid his Lordmip yawn- 
 in, and then falling afleep.
 
 EDWARD. 231 
 
 CHAP. XXV. 
 
 Upbraid, ye ravening tribes, our wanton rage> 
 For hunger kindles you and lawlefs want ; 
 But lavilh fed, in nature's bounty roll'd, 
 To joy in anguifh, and delight in blood, 
 Is what your horrid bofom never knew, 
 
 THOMSbN. 
 
 HAD Lord Filtagree's ill habits been lefs 
 Confirmed, or had he remained Jonger 
 than he did at the fchool where he was now 
 placed, he might have reaped confiderable 
 benefit from being among a fet of boys who 
 would not bear his arrogance, and under 
 matters who gave it no protection. 
 
 The petulance of his malice was fre- 
 quently pointed againft Edward ; but moft 
 of his attempts to mortify him ended in 
 the mortification of the aggreflbr. On 
 one occafion, when a number of the boys 
 were playing at cricket in a field near the 
 fchool, and in the prefence of one of the 
 umers, a perfon, who was looking on, being 
 ftruck with the fymmetry, vigour, arid ad- 
 
 drefs
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 drefs of Edward, afked a boy, who had 
 come to fchcol only the preceding day, 
 \vho Edward was ? 
 
 The boy anfwefed, "He did not know." 
 
 Lord Fillagree, overhearing the quef- 
 tion and anfwer, burft into laughter, and 
 faid, " You have afked a queflion, Sir, very 
 difficult to be anfwered j nobody knows 
 who the devil he is. 1 * 
 
 Edward heard the laugh, and fufpeding, 
 by the looks of the byftanders being all 
 directed to him, that Fillagree had faid 
 fomething infulting, he walked coolly up 
 to him, " May I requeft of your Lord- 
 {hip to repeat what you have juft faid ?" 
 
 u All I have faid," replied Fillagree in 
 a fcoffing manner, " is, that nobody knows 
 v;hat you are ; you have the misfortune, 
 Sir, not to be known." 
 
 " And all I fay in return," replied Ed- 
 ward, " is, that every body knows what you 
 are ; you have the misfortune, my Lord, to 
 be known." 
 
 The laugh was now turned againft Filla- 
 gree ; but Edward returned to cricket with- 
 out joining in it. 
 
 This
 
 EDWARD. 233 
 
 This tended to augment Lord Fillagree's 
 hatred againft Edward, which a frefh inci- 
 dent exalted to the higheft point. The 
 young Lord was fond of a diverfion, which, 
 to the difgrace of human nature, was for- 
 merly practifed, at a particular feafon of the 
 year, in the ftreets of London and in many 
 villages of Great Britain ; it confifted of 
 tying a cock to a ftake, and throwing flicks 
 at the poor animal till he was killed or un- 
 able to (land. 
 
 This horrid diverfion was revived, 
 through his Lordfhip's patronage, by a fel- 
 low who lived near the fchool. The young 
 Lord himfelf, by dint of practice, had ac- 
 quired fuch fuperior dexterity, that while 
 other boys paid but a fmall pittance for a 
 throw, the man declared he would not af- 
 ford one to his Lordfhip much under the 
 full price of the cock. This diftindion 
 was fo flattering to the groveling ambition 
 of the young Lord, that he confidered it as 
 an ample compenfation for the wretched 
 figure he made as a fcholar. Although 
 nobody liked better to ileep in a found fkin, 
 yet nothing delighted him fo much as be- 
 9 holding
 
 234- E D W A R D. 
 
 holding others, whether men or beafts, 
 bruifing and mangling each other ; indeed, 
 no kind of amufement Teemed to intereft 
 him, unlefs ibme circum fiances of cruelty 
 belonged to it. When he walked in the 
 fields, his great pleafute confided in throw- 
 ing ftones at all the birds, or other unrefift- 
 ing animals, that he could reach. Saunter- 
 ing alone, immediately behind the fchooi, 
 one morning, he faw a tame pigeon, a" fa- 
 vourite of the matter's, feeding a few yards 
 from him ; after attentively looking around, 
 and believing that nobody faw him, he 
 threw a {tone, and killed the pigeon on the 
 fpot. 
 
 Whatever pleafure could be derived from 
 the coniciouinefs of fuch an exploit, his 
 Lordmip, no doubt, enjoyed it ; but he 
 could have none from the applaufe of 
 others. The bird being uncommonly beau- 
 tiful and familiar with all the boys, was not 
 only the mailer's favourite, but, what feldom 
 happens to favourites, was generally be- 
 loved. The young Lord therefore durft 
 not truft his greateft intimate with the- 
 knowledge of this at, but retired with ail 
 j i fpeed
 
 EDWARD. 235 
 
 fpeed to a diftance, that he might not be 
 fufpeaed. 
 
 Clifton, Edward, and another boy, how- 
 ever, had, from a back window of the 
 ichool, *een the whole tranfaclion. 
 
 " Let us go tliiectly," faid the boy, " and 
 acquaint the mafter." 
 
 " /{hall nor," faid Edward, " and I hope 
 neither of you will." 
 
 " To my knoxvledge," faid the other, 
 u he hates you, and would do you every 
 mifchief in his power." 
 
 " I know it," replied Edward ; " and if 
 he mould continue to hate me, I am deter- 
 mined that it (hall be without caufe." 
 
 " I don't like to be a tale-bearer more 
 than you," faid the boy ; Cl but it is a pity 
 that he mould efcape unpuniflied for fuch 
 an a&ion." 
 
 " He fhall not efcape," cried Clifton. 
 Edward earneftly begged that they would 
 not mention what they had fee a ; repre- 
 fenting, that although the deed deferved 
 punifhment, it was beneath them to appear 
 as informers ; that as they were known to 
 be on bad terms with his Lordihip, it would 
 
 appear
 
 236 E D \V A R D. 
 
 appear as if they were actuated by re- 
 venge. 
 
 U I own that I am actuated by revenge," 
 cried Clifton ; " I will avenge the poor 
 pigeon's death ; for although I fcorn to in- 
 form, I will pick a quarrel with him, and 
 fight him." 
 
 " You had not beft pick a quarrel with 
 him on this fcore," laid Edward ; " fmce 
 that would certainly lead to the mafter's 
 knowledge of the whole affair, which would 
 be doing in a fecret and indirect manner 
 what you fcorn to do openly." 
 
 " Well, perhaps you are right," faid 
 Clifton ; " I fhall therefore fay nothing 
 about this bufmefs, either to the mafter or 
 himfelf." 
 
 This was agreed to ; but an incident of a 
 fingular nature brought the whole to light a 
 fhort time after. 
 
 Lord Fillagree had found it difficult to 
 introduce the amufement of throwing at 
 cocks among the boys ; many of them, 
 however, were fond of cock-fighting , and 
 although interdicted by the mafter, fome 
 cf them fecretly kept cocks for that purpofe. 
 
 Lord
 
 EDWARD. 237 
 
 Lord Fillagree was particularly fond of 
 this amufement, and was prefent, as often 
 as he poffibly couid, at all the cock matches 
 that were fought in the neighbourhood. 
 The moft eminent cock-fighter in thefe 
 parts was a butcher. This man had one very 
 line cock, which had won feveral battles, 
 and gained him a good deal of money ; 
 but one day, being tempted by what he 
 thought an advantageous bet, when the bird 
 was almoft exhaufted with repeated victo- 
 ries, this wretch, with the unfeeling cold- 
 nefs of a covetous heart,, matched him with 
 a frefh cock. The generous animal began 
 this lafl combat with unabated fpirit ; but it 
 loon appeared, from his feeble attacks and 
 tottering fteps, that although his courage 
 was intire, his ftrength was wafted ; his op- ' 
 ponent ftruck him a blow which was 
 deemed mortal ; he lay without motion 
 on the ground, and the victory was declared 
 in favour of the frefh cock. 
 
 The wounded veteran, however, did not 
 expire on the fpot, as was expected ; but 
 after fome time fhevved figns of recovery. 
 Neverthelefs, the lofs of his money threw 
 
 the
 
 2^S EDWARD. 
 
 the man, if fuch a brute may be called a 
 man, into fo violent a r a g e > that, unmind- 
 ful of the paft merit, and unmoved at the 
 mangled condition of the panting animal, 
 " Damn him," cried the wretch, "he will 
 never gain me another milling by fighting ; 
 but he is ftiil worth throwing at, and ib, 
 my Lord," continued he, addrefTmg Lord 
 Fillagree, t: for half a crown, you may have 
 a throw at him at the ufual diftance." 
 
 The young Lord accepted the offer ; and 
 the helplefs animal would have fallen a fa- 
 crifice to the rafe and wanton cruelty of 
 two creatures, in many refpecls his infe- 
 riors, had not Edward accidentally pafTed 
 that way. After being informed of the 
 circum (lances, he pulled out feven or eight 
 fhillings, all the money he had in his pocket, 
 and offered them to the butcher for the 
 cock, that he might fave fo fine an animal 
 from a fate fo cruel and unmerited. 
 
 " No, curfe him," cried the butcher, " he 
 has loft me a damnation, fum of money; 
 and I mail at leaft have the pleafure of fee- 
 ing his brains beat out." 
 
 Edward
 
 EDWARD. 239 
 
 Edward threw down the money, fnatched 
 up the cock, and declared he would not 
 fuffer him to be thrown at. 
 
 Fillagree faid, " the cock was the man's 
 property ; that he had a right to do with 
 him what he pleafed." 
 
 A boy, of the name~of \Vormly, an ob- 
 fequious companion of the young Lord, 
 fupporfed his opinion, which encouraged 
 Fillagree to lay hold of Edward, and en- 
 deavour to take the cock from him by vio- 
 lence. After being requefted in vain to de- 
 fift, he was checked by a blow from Ed- 
 ward, which brought blood from the young 
 Lord's nofe. 
 
 The butcher, on making the fame at- 
 tempt, met with the fame kind of rebuke 
 from Clifton ; who, with another boy, had 
 juft come up. The butcher returned Clif- 
 ton's blow with fuch a force as brought that 
 youth to the graund, where he received a 
 fecond from Fillagree. The butcher, 
 Wormly, and Fillagree, were now fiercely 
 attacked by Edward and the other boy ; 
 and on Clifton's recovering and joining 
 
 them,
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 them, Fillagree took to flight, Wormly fol- 
 lowed him ; and the butcher bellowed for 
 mercy. 
 
 " You ought to be afhamed to pronounce 
 the word, villain," iaid Edward ; " but 
 what you would not {hew to this poor bird, 
 which merited fo much, we will fhew to 
 you, though you deferve none." So fay- 
 ing, he begged his friends to fpare the fel- 
 low ; and defiring him again to take up 
 the money he had thrown down, as the 
 price of the cock, he and his companions 
 walked away j Edward carrying the cock 
 with him, which indeed he had never 
 quitted, having fought all the time wi,th his 
 right hand only.
 
 EDWARD. 241 
 
 CHAP. XXVI. 
 
 They that on glorious anceftors enlarge 
 Produce their debt, inftead of their difcharge. 
 
 YOUNG. 
 
 following day the butcher had the 
 impudence to make a formal com- 
 plaint to the head mafter of the fchool, that 
 Edward had firft robbed him of his cock, 
 and then, in conjunction with Clifton and 
 another boy, had beaten him unmercifully 
 adducing Fillagree and Wormly as wit- 
 nefles ; who not only fupported the butch- 
 er's accufation in every point, but added 
 frefh matter of charge on their own ac- 
 count ; but in the courfe of the examina- 
 tion the true ftate of the cafe was made ma- 
 nifeft ; the boy, who with Clifton and Ed- 
 ward had been witnefs to the killing of the 
 pigeon, felt fo much indignation at Filla- 
 gree's accufation of Edward, who had acted 
 fo different a part refpecting him, that he 
 informed the mafter of that incident alfo. 
 VOL. I. R " Why
 
 242 E D W A R D. 
 
 " Why did you not inform me of this 
 immediately after it happened?" faid the 
 matter. 
 
 " So I would," replied the boy, " had 
 I not be en prevented by Edward himfelf, 
 who fcorned to appear as an evidence againft 
 one whom he knew to be his enemy." He 
 then told the mafter all that patted between 
 Clifton, Edward, and himfelf, at the time. 
 Lord Fillagree was fo confounded at this 
 teftimony, with the applaufe it procured 
 to Edward, and the difgrace it threw on 
 himfelf, that he was unable to offer a word 
 in his own defence, and feemed over- 
 whelmed with confcious guilt. 
 
 The mafter then turning to the butcher, 
 laid, " If there is no law to punifh fuch un- 
 provoked and deteftable wickednefs as you 
 have manifefted, it is owing to its not having 
 entered into the mind of the legiilature that 
 ever there could exift a wretch capable of it. 
 Your horrid conduct has proved what could 
 not before be imagined, and you muft 
 henceforth be held in abhorrence by every 
 perfon endowed with a fmgle fpark of hu- 
 manity. As for the young man of whom 
 
 you
 
 EDWARD. 243 
 
 you have had the effrontery to complain, 
 all the world muft approve of his conduct, 
 as much as they muft deteft yours. Go, 
 vile wretch, hide yourfelf from the eyes of 
 humanity, to which you are a difgrace." 
 
 The butcher flunk away amidft the hifles 
 of the boys. The mafter then addrefled 
 himfeif to Fillagree in thefe words : " You 
 deferve to be feverely punifhed, both for 
 killing the pigeon, arid alfo for offering to 
 abet, in any way, the odious rage of that vile 
 fellow. I am content, however, to pafs 
 over your behaviour without farther notice, 
 becaufe the pigeon was mine, and alfo in 
 confideration of what you now fuffer, from 
 the wretched figure you make in the eyes 
 of your fchool-fellows, which I am willing 
 to hope will be fufficient to work a favour- 
 able change in your behaviour." 
 
 Having faid this, the mafter difmiffed 
 the boys ; they attended Edward with the 
 moft genuine marks of applaufe, while 
 Fillagree fneaked off to his chamber, abafhed 
 and confounded at the iffue of an affair, 
 R 2 from
 
 244 E D W A R D. 
 
 from which he had flattered himfelf with 
 the gratification of his revenge. 
 
 It was not in the mailer's power entirely 
 toabolifh cock- lighting, although he took 
 great pains to make the boys relinquish a 
 diverfion, the tendency of which is to 
 harden the heart, and to infufe a reliih for 
 fights of cruelty and bloodmed. There 
 feems to be fome principle in nature which 
 renders the fight of righting highly inte- 
 refting to the generality of mankind. In 
 this country, the only mortal combats 
 which are permitted, and prevail as a public 
 amufement, are thofe of cocks; but the 
 ihocking fcenes which were adted on the 
 Roman amphitheatres prove to what a 
 height this tafte for bloody fpe&acles may 
 be brought in a whole nation. To behold 
 men cut and mangle each other; to ex- 
 pofe them to be torn in pieces righting 
 with wild beads, became the favourite en- 
 tertainment of that people, and increafed 
 to iuch a degree, that all other amufements 
 became comparatively infipid ; ,_they re-
 
 EDWARD. 245 
 
 mained whole days in the amphitheatres, 
 feafting their eyes on thefe horrid fcenes, 
 from which the calls of bufmefs or duty 
 were often too feeble to draw them. Were 
 the Romans of a different nature from the 
 reft of mankind ? or, Were the hearts of that 
 people gradually hardened by the horrid 
 policy of permitting fuch fpe&acles ? Is it 
 clear that thofe who take delight in viewing 
 cocks mangle and kill each other, but think 
 with horror of what pafled on the Roman 
 amphitheatres, would not gradually come 
 to relifh the combats of gladiators and of 
 wild beafts, if fuch combats were permitted 
 by the government and laws of the country? 
 Mankind are efTentially the fame in all cli- 
 mates; the points in which they differ are 
 few and trifling when compared with thofe 
 in which they agree. Britons are more 
 humane than the Romans, becaufe their 
 government is better, their laws milder, and 
 becaufe the fame fcenes of cruelty are riot 
 exhibited before their eyes. The poet's 
 obfervation refpecting vice in general is 
 peculiarly true when applied to fcenes of 
 
 cruelty : 
 
 R 3 Which
 
 246 E D \V A R D. 
 
 Which to be hated need but to be feen ; 
 Yet feen too oft, fami!:;' - with her face, 
 We firft end:.-,-?, then/j/y, than embrace, 
 
 If then a good government is one of the 
 moft powerful engines for precluding na- 
 tional vice and promoting national virtue, 
 is it not the duty of every Englishman to 
 do what is in his power for the prefervation, 
 not of the forms only, but the ipirit of that 
 free Conftitution which was eftablifhed in 
 Great Britain and Ireland in the year 
 1688? 
 
 A few hours after the fcuffle about the 
 cock took place, Lord Fillagree had written 
 a very partial account of it to his aunt, Lady 
 Lofty, imagining that fhe would write to 
 the matter on the fubjeft, and expecting 
 that her Ladyfhip's letter would make him 
 declare againft Edward, and in his own fa- 
 vour. In confequence of this manoeuvre. 
 Lady Lofty fent by cxprefs a letter to the 
 matter, in the following terms : 
 
 "SIR, 
 
 " I have heard with aftonifhment that my 
 nephew, the Right Honourable Lord Filla- 
 gree,
 
 EDWARD. 247 
 
 gree, was infulted in the grofleft manner 
 by a low boy, who by fome overfight has 
 been admitted into your fchool ; this crea- 
 ture, I underftarcd, is fupported by charity, 
 and came originally from an hcfpital. 
 
 " I take it for granted that you have 
 already punifhed the villain ; but I muft 
 farther infift, that he (hall be without 
 delay expelled ; this is neceflfary for your 
 own character, and without it you can- 
 not expect that I, or others of the firft 
 rank, will permit their relations to remain 
 at your fchool. 
 
 I am, &c. &c. &c." 
 
 How much both the young Lord and her 
 Ladyfhip had miftaken the character of the 
 mafter, will appear by his anfwer, which 
 was as follows : 
 
 " MADAM, 
 
 " I have the honour of your Ladyfhip's 
 letter, and muft fuppofe that the affair be- 
 tween your nephew and young Edward has 
 been very much mifreprefented to you ; for 
 after a very' full examination into all the 
 R 4 circum-
 
 348 E D W A R D. 
 
 circumftances, I can aflure your Ladyfhip 
 that there is inconteftible proof of the lat- 
 ter' s having behaved through the whole 
 with equal fpirit and humanity, which in- 
 deed is conformable to the character I re- 
 ceived of him when he firft came to the 
 fchool, and which he has fupported ever 
 fince he has been in it. With regard to the 
 unfortunate circumftance in this youth's 
 fituation, to which you allude, I have only 
 to obferve, that whatever his birth may 
 be, his difpofition, talents, and conduct, 
 are fuch as would do credit to the moft 
 illuftrious. 
 
 " Your Ladyftiip muft therefore perceive, 
 that if expulfion were a meafure neceflary 
 to be adopted on the prefent occafion, he 
 is not the perfonon whom it would be ex- 
 ercifed ; and even had his behaviour been 
 as blameable as it is praifeworthy, it is my 
 duty to inform your Ladyihip, that his pu- 
 nimment would neither have been increafed 
 jior diminimed by what you might injijl 
 upon, nor by the opinion of peribns of any 
 other rank, except that of mafter of tliis, 
 
 fchool.
 
 EDWARD. 249 
 
 fchool. As your Ladyfhip has been pleafed 
 to hint at what you think neceflary for my 
 own character, that being a point which 
 touches me only, it would be unreafonable 
 to expect that you fhould give yourfelf 
 farther trouble about it. 
 
 *' I am, with all duerefpeft, your Ladyfhip's 
 moft obedient humble fervant, 
 JOSEPH GEORGICS." 
 
 The immediate confequence of this letter, 
 as the mafter expected, was Lord Fillagree's 
 removal from the fchool. From this time 
 the Countefs often fpoke againft this parti- 
 cular feminary, and public fchools in ge- 
 neral, which {he defcribed as the nurferies 
 of licentioufnefs and hot-beds of fedition, 
 where ranks were too much confounded, 
 and where drudging afliduity and vulgar 
 acutenefs were fometimes permitted to 
 triumph over the higheft diftinctions of 
 birth ; and fhe exprefled her furprife that 
 the fons of the nobility were not kept 
 diftinct from thofe of commoners, by being 
 
 placed
 
 250 E D W A R D. 
 
 placed in feparate chambers when at fchooJ, 
 as the peers and commoners are in parlia- 
 ment, by which means the fuperiority of 
 the nobility over commoners, in all praife- 
 worthy endowments, would be as evident 
 in the public fchools as it is in parliament.
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XXVII. 
 
 -. - We might have fpared our coming hither, 
 Fruitlefs to me, though fruit be here to excefs. 
 
 MILTOJT. 
 
 and Edward remained a confi- 
 derable time at this ichool, which proved 
 advantageous to both, not only on account 
 of the progrefs they made in claflical lite- 
 rature, but alfo from the fer vices they reci- 
 procally rendered each other. Clifton's at- 
 tachment to Edward drew the attention 
 of feveral perfons of rank on the latter, by 
 whom otherwife he probably never would 
 have been noticed ; and the high efteem 
 in which Clifton was held by Edward, gave 
 the former an importance in the eyes of a 
 few diicerning men, which he would not 
 have derived from his fortune and birth. 
 
 The period at lad arrived when Clifton's 
 relations thought proper that hefliould go to 
 che Univerfity ; and when the two youths 
 feparated at the fummer vacation, they ex- 
 
 prefled
 
 252 E D W A R D. 
 
 prefled mutual hopes of meeting there, 
 Mrs. Harriet's inclination was, that Edward 
 fhould have a complete education in the 
 firft place j and that he fhould then be left 
 to his own choice, with refpect to his pro- 
 feflion. With this view, fhe wifhed that he 
 fhould pafs fome time at one of the Univer- 
 fities ; but while fhe was confidering how 
 to render this meafure agreeable to her 
 hufband, an incident took place which 
 faved her all farther thought on that head. 
 
 An old acquaintance of Mr. Barnet's hap- 
 pened to call upon him one day, when his 
 brother-in-law, Mr. Temple, and his coufm 
 Wormwood were with him. In the courfe 
 of converfation, the gentleman mentioned 
 his intention of fending his ion, a youth of 
 eighteen, to one of the Univerfuies. 
 
 " I prefume," faid Mr. Wormwood; 
 " your fon is intended for the church." 
 
 " No, Sir," replied the gentleman ; " he 
 has always fhewed an averfion to the 
 church." 
 
 " He is intended, perhaps, for the fludy of 
 phyfic," refumed Wormwood. 
 
 "So
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 " So far from it," faid the gentleman, 
 4< that he loaths phyfick more, if poflible, 
 than divinity." 
 
 " Your fon may make a very refpedable 
 figure in life, for all that," faid Mr. Barnet ; 
 " for I muft own I was very much of his 
 tafte at his age." 
 
 " Well, but what advantage," refumed 
 Wormwood, " do you propofe to your fon 
 from fpending two or three years at the 
 Univerfity ?" 
 
 " In the firft place," replied the gentle- 
 man, " he will be removed for two or 
 three years from the fedudions of London, 
 which I think a very great advantage." 
 
 " A very great advantage, indeed !" 
 added Mr. Barnet. 
 
 " It is an advantage, however," faid Mr. 
 Wormwood, " that he might reap in patting 
 his time in any county of England, Middk- 
 fex excepted." 
 
 " That is very true likewife," rejoined 
 
 Barnet, after a little mufmg " Yes, to be 
 
 fure, he is as clear of the feductions of Lon- 
 
 12 don
 
 254 E D W A R D. 
 
 don in Cornwall or Cumberland* as at Ox- 
 ford." 
 
 " The greateft inducement to ftudy is the 
 pleafure it affords," refumed Wormwood ; 
 " if your Ion has a tafte for ftudy, he will 
 indulge it wherever he goes." 
 
 " I cannot fay, that hitherto he has 
 (hewn any tafte for it," anfwered the gentle- 
 man. 
 
 " You had beft wait till he does fliew a 
 little," faid Wormwood, " before you fend 
 him to the Univerfity ; for although fuch 
 a tafte may be ftrengthened and improved, 
 it feldom is created there." 
 
 " It is precifely, becaufe he has betrayed 
 a diftafte for ftudy every where elfe, that I 
 have taken the refolution of obliging him, 
 much againft his own inclination, to pafs a 
 couple of years at the Univerfity, in the 
 hopes that he may acquire a fondnefs for 
 it there," faid the gentleman. 
 
 " Why, Sir, you may juft as well fhut a 
 man up in a cathedral for a couple of years, 
 
 on
 
 EDWARD. 255- 
 
 on purpofe to give him a tafte for the 
 church," rejoined Wormwood. 
 
 " You muft allow," faid the gentleman, 
 " that it is impoffible for a young man to 
 be fo diffipated at a feminary of learning as 
 in the capital." 
 
 " I will allow that it is impoffible to 
 be diffipated in the fame manner," faid 
 Wormwood ; '* but lounging all the morn- 
 ing, and drinking port all the evening, are 
 as unlikely to create a tafte for fludy, as 
 paffing the fame time at Hyde Park and 
 the Theatres." 
 
 " The accefs which ftudents have to the 
 public libraries is furely a great advantage," 
 refumed the gentleman. 
 
 " I am told," anfwered Mr. Wormwood, 
 " that your own library in the country is 
 an excellent one." 
 
 " Not equal to thofe in the Univerfities," 
 faid the gentleman ; " and if ftudents do 
 not profit by them there, it is their own 
 fault." 
 
 " If my fon were to raifpend the time al- 
 lotted for ftudy, it would afford me no con- 
 folation," replied Mr. Wormwood, " that 
 H it
 
 256 EDWARD. 
 
 it was his own fault ; neither would it maker 
 much difference, whether this happened at 
 the Univerfity or at my own houfe ; only, 
 at the latter I fhould probably be fooner ac- 
 quainted with it.'* 
 
 " He may attend the public lectures at 
 the Univerfity," added the gentleman. 
 
 " Whether it is owing to their being ill- 
 attended to, or from fome other caufe, I 
 cannot fay," anfwered Mr. Wormwood ; 
 " but I believe thefe are pretty much laid 
 afide." 
 
 " If they are," faid the gentleman, " ftill 
 there are many perfons to be found at our 
 Univerfities exceedingly well qualified to 
 affift young gentlemen in their ftudies." 
 
 " There certainly are," refumed Worm- 
 wood ; " but as your fon will need but one, 
 he will reap no additional advantage by- 
 going, where there are many." 
 
 " He may be privately inftructed at ei- 
 ther Univerfity," faid the gentleman. 
 
 " Not more privately," anfwered Worm- 
 wood, " than at your houfe in the coun- 
 try." 
 
 . 
 
 " One
 
 EDWARD. 257 
 
 " One perfon cannot teach another every 
 thing," faid the gentleman ; " particularly 
 one of my fon's age." 
 
 " My dear Sir," rejoined Mr. Worm- 
 wood, " I am fo far from thinking that one 
 man can teach another every thing, that I 
 have long had a notion that no man can 
 teach another any thing." 
 
 " How do people acquire learning, then ?" 
 faid the gentleman. 
 
 " They teach themfelves," anfwered 
 Wormwood. 
 
 " But what becomes of thofe who cannot 
 take that trouble r" the other afked. 
 
 " They learn little or nothing," anfwered 
 Wormwood ; "for although a little Latin 
 and Greek may be whipt into a boy at 
 fchool, whether he will or will not, all is 
 foon forgot, if they do not afterwards culti- 
 vate thofe languages from tafte. Believe me, 
 therefore, Sir, that until your fon has ac- 
 qqired a real fondnefs for fludy, until he 
 finds it one of the enjoyments of his life, 
 to which he is led by the pleafure it pro- 
 duces, it will be of little importance to fend 
 him to the Univerfity. Indeed, if be is fent 
 
 VOL. i. s contrary
 
 258 EDWARD. 
 
 contrary to his own inclination, the proba- 
 bility is, that his diflike to ftudy and literary 
 fociety will increafe there ; whereas, if he 
 had already fome tafte for fuch purfuits and 
 fuch fociety, he would himfelf be impatient 
 to go there; his tafte would be improved, 
 and he might acquire more literary know- 
 ledge than, perhaps, he could in the fame 
 time, and with equal application any where 
 elfe. All depends on his own turn of mind ; 
 without a ftrong defire, nothing can be 
 learnt at your fon's age. Where many maf- 
 ters are employed, it generally happens that 
 the leaft is learnt ; but he that is fond of 
 ftudy will foon find thofe who can aflift 
 him." 
 
 The gentleman, after a cc*nfiderable 
 paufe, refumed. " Mod of the young men 
 of rank, in this country, pafs two or three 
 years at one or other of the Univerfities ; 
 an early acquaintance and friendfhip with 
 fome of them may be highly advantageous 
 to my fon, as it has been to many others." 
 
 " I have heard that argument fo often 
 ufed," faid Wormwood, " as a reafon for fend- 
 ing young men to the Univerfities, that I 
 
 begin
 
 EDWARD. 259 
 
 Begin to think it has more extenfive weight 
 than any other ; it operates on the mind like 
 the great prizes in the lottery j people are fo 
 much tempted by them as to forget that it is 
 a lofmg game on the whole ; and that the 
 acquaintance and example of thofe high- 
 born youths may lead others into habits and 
 purfuits which will more than counterba- 
 lance all the advantages to be derived from, 
 their friendfhips, although there were a cer- 
 tainty of retaining them. Befides," continued 
 he, " if your greateft inducement in fending 
 your fon to an Univerfity is his forming an 
 acquaintance with men of quality, I imagine 
 I could put you on a plan which would give 
 him a ftill better chance of fucceeding." 
 
 " Pray what is that ?" cried Barnet. 
 
 " Send him to Newmarket and the gam- 
 ing-houfes," anfwered Wormwood. 
 
 " I believe there is fomething in that," 
 cried Mr. Barnet ; " for there is Tom, 
 Sweepftakes, whofe father was a ccok, and 
 who never ftudied any thing but hazard and 
 horfe-racing ; yet he is hand and glove 
 with a greater number of Lords and Duke$ 
 than any fellow of any Univerfity." 
 
 s a Mr*
 
 260 EDWARD. 
 
 Mr. Temple, who hitherto had liftencd 
 to the converfation without taking any part, 
 now addrefled himfeif to Wormwood in the 
 following terms : 
 
 " After all you hare faid, it is evident, 
 that the utmoft which can be done to ren- 
 der a feminary of education ufeful, is to- 
 unite in, it as many inducements to ftudy as 
 we can, and exclude whatever corrupts the 
 morals, and tends to promote difiipation, 
 Thofe objects are, in fome degree, accom- 
 plimed at our Univerfities; tvhere the tafte 
 of the ftudent may be formed to literature 
 by the fociety and converfation of men of 
 letters, where he has a command of the heft 
 books in every branch of learning, is ftimu- 
 lated by emulation and by literary rewards, 
 while he is fequeftered from the fplendid 
 luxuries of life, the diflipating amufements 
 of the capital, from afTemblies, operas, plays, 
 and has nothing prefented to his view but 
 fuch objects as favour contemplation, and 
 excite the defire of intellectual improve- 
 ment. There is not, indeed, an abfolute 
 obligation on the young men to ftudy; they 
 
 are
 
 EDWARD. 261 
 
 are not compelled to their tafks, norterrified 
 to exertion by the fame means that are ufed 
 at inferior feminaries and you yourfelf, 
 Mr. Wormwood, have admitted, that after a. 
 certain age whatever a perfon learns effec- 
 tually, he acquires by his own voluntary 
 efforts ; and that thofe who rely on the la- 
 bour of teachers learn little or nothing. At 
 our Univerfities, no doubt, as every where 
 fife, many young men are averfe to fludy, 
 fond of pleafure, and incapable of fteady 
 application. The ablefl inftrudtors, and the 
 beft inftructions, will be of little uie to 
 youths of fuch difpofitions, and they will 
 receive as little literary improvement at the 
 Univcrfity as they would have done had 
 they palled the fame time in the country or 
 in the capital. The fair queftion is, Whe- 
 ther a young man, with a tafte for letters, 
 and a defire for knowledge, has it, or has it 
 not in his power to improve himfelf more 
 at the Univerfity, than he could in the fame 
 time any where elfe in this kingdom ? Now, 
 that the inducements to fludy, and the 
 means of literary improvement, are united 
 there as fuccefsfully as in any other part of 
 s 3
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 this liland, or in Europe, feems probable, 
 from this obfervation, that no country, or 
 feminary of learning in Europe, has pro- 
 duced a greater number of eminently learned 
 men than England, the moll diftinguiftied 
 of whom, were educated at its Univer-? 
 Titles." 
 
 Mr. Wormwood, finding himfelf unpre- 
 pared to make a ferious anfwer to Mr. 
 Temple's obfervation, was driven to the 
 fubterfuge of attempting a jeft, inftead of 
 an argument ; he faid, with a carelefs air, 
 " This fertility of learning is, no doubt, 
 owing, in a great meafure, to the quantities 
 of port wine which is drank at the Uni- 
 verfities." 
 
 Mr. Temple not deigning to make any 
 return to this, the converfation took a dif- 
 ferent turn. 
 
 The fame evening Mr. Barnet, who never 
 underftood irony, however obvious, being 
 alone with his coufm Wormwood, faid to 
 him, " I never knew that port wine was fo 
 much relifhcd at the Univerfities." 
 
 " Relilhed !" cried Wormwood, whom 
 the claret he had drank after dinner had 
 
 put
 
 EDWARD. 263 
 
 put him in a gayer mood than ufual; " that 
 // is, (continued he,) moft of the ftudents, 
 over and above all their other improve-* 
 ments, acquire at the Univerftties a decided 
 tafte for port wine.** 
 
 " It is the beft tafte they can acquire,** 
 faid Mr. Barnet ; " for it is not only the 
 cheapeft, but alfo the wholefomeft wine 
 they can drink I have always found it fo.'* 
 " It does not infpire thofe light airy fan- 
 cies,'* faid Wormwood, " which your thin 
 iparkling French wines produce, but folid, 
 fubftantial, and weighty converfation.** 
 
 " I have always found it fo,** repeated 
 Mr. Barnet. 
 
 " Port wine infpires politics as copioufly 
 as the ftreams of Caftalia did poetry,*' con- 
 tinued Wormwood. 
 
 " As for my part," faid Mr. Barnet, " I 
 never tafte any flream whatever ; but I 
 have been told that the greateft politician 
 in the kingdom drinks^ nothing but port 
 wine.'* 
 
 " How could he otherwife have ftood fo 
 long againft oppofition ?" rejoined Worm-- 
 wood.'* 
 
 34 "IfufpecV
 
 264 E D W A R D. 
 
 " I fufpca," faid Mr. Barnet, " that the 
 leading Members of Oppofition deal too 
 much in your frifky French wines, and in 
 that fame ftream you mentioned." 
 
 " You think, perhaps, they had belter 
 apply to the great politician^c/ar mentioned, 
 for a portion of his port," faid Worm- 
 wood. 
 
 " That is my real opinion," anfwered 
 Barnet. 
 
 " It mud be owned," faid Wormwood, 
 tc that a very great many people in this coun- 
 try are of the fame opinion." 
 
 Here the dialogue was interrupted by 
 Mrs. Barnet's joining them. 
 
 Perhaps it would be too much to affcrt 
 that Mr. Barnet was determined to fend 
 Edward to the Univerfity, entirely by the 
 hopes of his acquiring a tafte for port wine, 
 and fo becoming a more agreeable compa- 
 nion to Barnet himfelf ; but he certainly 
 often regretted that the boy did not relifh 
 it, and was fomctimes a little cut of humour 
 with his wife for encouraging him in his 
 abftinence ; and it is alfo certain that the 
 day after this converfation with Worm- 
 wood,
 
 EDWARD. 265 
 
 ptrood, he told Mrs. Barnet that he was re- 
 folved to fend Edward to the Univerfity, on 
 purpofe to finifh his education. Mrs. 
 Barnet approved highly of this meafure, 
 which was put in execution a fortnight after. 
 
 The friendfhip which had fo long fub- 
 fifted between Edward and Clifton conti- 
 nued with undiminifhed fervour at the 
 Univerfity, notwithftanding a corifiderable 
 difference in their characters. 
 
 The latter difplaying a fire and impetuo- 
 fity of temper which often overleaped the 
 bounds of prudence or propriety, while the 
 pafilons of the other were more under the 
 control of reflection. 
 
 This difference feemed to have arifen 
 from their oppofite fituations in life, more 
 than from any original difference in their 
 difpofmons or natural powers. One being 
 nobly defcended, the>. heir of a confider- 
 able fortune, fplendidly connected, fur- 
 rounded by thoie who admired his viva- 
 city and encouraged his diffipation. The 
 dependent (late in which the other was 
 placed Simulated exertion and awakened 
 circumfpedtion. The firft ftate often pro- 
 1 duces
 
 266 EDWARD. 
 
 duces an arrogant and unfeeling character. 
 This was prevented in Clifton by early hints 
 from his mother, who, notwithstanding her 
 life of fafhionable diffipation, was a woman 
 of good underftanding and great benevo- 
 lence. The fecond ftate fometimes finks 
 the mind into defpondency ; or, which is a 
 ilill greater misfortune, by fuggefting flat- 
 tery and fawning, produces an abject cha- 
 ra&er ; this was prevented in Edward by 
 native fund of firmnefs and manly pride*
 
 E D \V A R n 267 
 
 CHAP. XXVIII. 
 
 As, forc'd from wind-guns, lead itfelf can fly, 
 
 And pond'rcus flugs cut fwiftly through the fky } 
 
 As clocks to weight their nimble motion owe, 
 
 The wheels above urged by the load below ; 
 
 Him emptinefs and dulnefs could infpire, 
 
 And were hi$ elafticity and fire. POPE. 
 
 y\ T the Univerfity Edward became ac- 
 quainted with all the companions of his 
 friend Clifton, the natural carelefsnefs and 
 gaiety of whofe temper rendered him lefs 
 delicate in his choice than he ought to have 
 been in lo important an article; the relifli 
 he had for whatever was fingular and ridi- 
 culous in character led him fometimes to 
 prefer the company of thofe who were fo 
 diftinguifhed to more eftimable ibciety; 
 from this, more than from being his kinf- 
 man, proceeded that degree of intimacy 
 which fubfifted between him and Mr. 
 Carnaby Shadow. This young man was the 
 fon by a former marriage of Lady Maukifh, 
 3 who
 
 268 E D W A R D. 
 
 who was nearly related to Clifton's mother ; 
 he was of courfe fon-in-law to Sir Ma^ 
 thew Maukiih, \vhofe behaviour to the 
 lame failor on the heath it is hoped the 
 reader has not forgot. As Sir Mathew is 
 about to appear again on the icene, it will 
 be proper to give ibme account of his birth 
 and parentage. 
 
 It xvas fortunatf for Sir Mathew, who 
 valued himfelf for being much of a gentle- 
 man, that he was born in the city of Lon- 
 don ; for had he been born elfewhere, 
 there is a chance that he never would have 
 pafTed for a gentleman at all ; for it is only 
 in London that people of the fphere of life 
 in which his progenitors moved could have 
 accumulated fuch a quantity of riches, a*, 
 by the courtefy of England, procures the 
 title of gentleman to the meaneft of man- 
 kind. 
 
 Yet as often as Sir Mathew had occafion 
 to mention his family he pronounced the 
 v/ord rerun do ore, and with as ilrong em- 
 phafis as if it had been emblazoned with 
 the proudeft hieroglyphics of heraldry. 
 
 AH
 
 EDWARD. 2 % 
 
 All we could ever learn, however, either 
 from written annals or oral tradition, con- 
 cerning the houfe of Maukim, is, that the 
 grand-father of the prefent Sir Matthew 
 was renowned for one of the beft furniihed 
 ilop-mops in Wapping ; and that his father 
 was for many years an eminent oilman 
 in the environs of Drury-lane. His mo- 
 ther likewife diftinguifhed herfelf by va- 
 rious improvements in the myfteries of 
 fmoaking and pickling, fo that the very 
 beft fmoaked tongues and niceft pickles in 
 London were thought to be prepared and 
 fold by her. 
 
 By the joint efforts of this rcfpedlable 
 couple they accumulated a confide rable for- 
 tune, with part of which they purchafed a 
 moderate eftate at no great diftance from 
 London, to which, in the wane of life, " 
 they retired with their family, confiding of 
 a fon and daughter. The latter died young ; 
 the fon had an UniverGty education, and on, 
 the death of his father came into the pof- 
 feftion of a very confiderable fortune, 
 which it was the ruling paffion of his min<f 
 to increafe j he difdained however to enter 
 
 into
 
 * 7 o E D W A R D. 
 
 into any of thofe lines of life which are 
 called commercial, but determined to pur- 
 fue riches with all the affiduity of a trader 
 in a different path. His plan was to get 
 into parliament, where he thought his ge- 
 nius could not fail to conduct him to greater 
 wealth and importance. One confideratiOn 
 afflicted him; he thought he obferved in 
 the minifter rather a prejudice againft men 
 of genius ; that he chofe to place in fome 
 of the mod lucrative offices and nearefl to 
 himfelf, perfons of acknowledged dulnefs 
 and devoid of eloquence : he regretted 
 this, but expected that he fhould have 
 addrefs fufficient to create an exception in 
 his own favour. It was generally allowed 
 that Sir Mathew poflefTed a very large fhare 
 of vanity ; yet it was fometimes a fubjedt of 
 difpute whether he was not more avari- 
 cious than vain. In forming his acquaint- 
 ance, his rule was to connect himfelf with 
 tbofe who might affift him in his advance- 
 ment in life, and never require his affiftance 
 in return : he affiduoufly cultivated the 
 acquaintance of the opulent and powerful, 
 literally obferving a maxim which had been 
 
 often
 
 EDWARD. 271 
 
 often repeated to him by his father . 
 
 Such a man as you would be, 
 Draw unto fuch company. 
 
 By a few years conftantly employed in 
 making this collection, he formed at laft, 
 what he thought, a brilliant afTortment of 
 friends ; it muft be confefled, however, that 
 it confided of a few fortunate knaves, a 
 confiderable number of wealthy fools, and 
 fome noble Lords, mightily inclined to be of 
 the firft clafs, but really belonging to the 
 fecond. 
 
 Sir Mathew's views enlarged with his 
 fuccefs ; as he rofe in the fcale of import- 
 ance, his ambition augmented in force, vires 
 acquirit eundo. He had no fooner purchafed 
 a feat in parliament, than he looked with 
 the eyes of confidence to fome lucrative 
 and diftinguiihed office. Such a mark of 
 the minifter's attention he thought he had 
 a claim to on various accounts, particularly 
 on that of his eloquence ; a talent, which, in 
 his own opinion, he pofleffed in an eminent 
 degree, and which he was fond of difplay- 
 iflg even in private company. He ufually 
 
 fpoke,
 
 272 E D W A R D. 
 
 fpoke, on the moft frivolous fubjeds, iri 
 fuch a declamatory ftile, and delivered the 
 rnoft common-place fentiments with fuch 
 force of emphafis and gefliculation, that an 
 inattentive hearer might have miftaken his 
 verbofity for the dictates of wifdom and 
 profound reflection. 
 
 He attempted to impofe, in the fame 
 manner, on the Houfe of Commons, and 
 for this purpofe he ftudied a few fpeechesj 
 and pronounced them with all the pomp of 
 an aclor, and all the emphafis of gefticu- 
 lation ; hut the energy of his delivery could 
 not give weight to matter fo fpecifically 
 light ; it was like firing loofe feathers from 
 the mouth of a cannon much noife but to 
 no efFecl. For, however the Members may 
 be divided by the fpirit of party, yet neither 
 the influence of Adminiftration, in that 
 houfe, nor the partiality of Oppofition, can 
 fave dullnefs from ridicule, nor prevent wit 
 and eloquence from open applaufe. So that 
 Mr. Maukifh's orations (for he was not 
 then a Knight^ were reduced to their real 
 value, -and heard with that contempt which 
 
 was their due- 
 
 AYhen
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 When Mr. Maukifh found that his par- 
 liamentary talents did not piifti him up the 
 ladder of fortune fo quickly as he expeded, 
 he thought of affifting them by an advan- 
 tageous marriage. He had as high an opinion 
 of the charms of his countenance as of his 
 oratory : in the judgment of many, they 
 were much on a footing, and equally in- 
 fipid. 
 
 He paid his addrelfes to Lady Bab Sha- 
 dow, by birth a woman of quality, and 
 widow of a gentleman of that name. It 
 Was generally faid that her Ladyftiip had 
 married Mr. Shadow from pure love ; but 
 there was no reafon for this afTertion, except 
 that nobody could difcover in Mr. Shadow's 
 character arid fituation in life any rational 
 inducement for a woman in her's to marry 
 him. Lady Bab, however^ after his death, 
 called him the bed of men, and declared 
 that although fhe wer.e to live a thoufand 
 years me never would marry again, fo great 
 was her refpeel: for his memory. Mr. 
 Maukifh paid hjs addrefles noitwithftand- 
 ing ; his eloquence . was more fuccefsful 
 with Lady Bab than it had been in the 
 ' VOL. i ? Houfe
 
 274 EDWARD; 
 
 Houfe of Commons ; flic confented to marry 
 him a year and one day after the death of 
 Mr. Shadow, and configned to her fecbnd 
 hu&and all the perfonal charms ihe had 
 formerly devoted to the firft: it muft be 
 confefled the cargo was not fplendid ; Mr, 
 Maukifti himfelf ufed to fay,, that it was 
 not a fet of features or complexion that he 
 admired. 
 
 His afpiring mind was touched by con- 
 templating her connections and her favour 
 at court, which he thought much greater 
 than it was in reality. While fuch contem- 
 plations afforded him pleafure, he was fecure 
 from one fource of mortification that hum- 
 bles the pride of fome hufbands the luftre 
 of his own un-derftamling could not be ob- 
 fcured by the brilliancy of his Lady's. 
 
 Lady Bab Maukifh was unqueftionably a 
 very weak woman ; fome people have af- 
 ferted that fhe was, without exception, the 
 illlieft woman of quality about court. 
 This was going too far, and could be be- 
 lieved only by thofe who were better ac- 
 quainted with Lady Bab than with fome 
 other Ladies of quality about court, 
 
 So co
 
 EDWARD. 275 
 
 Soon after the marriage, a relation of her 
 Ladyfhip having been created a Knight of 
 the Bath while he was abroad, that gentle- 
 man, at Lady Bab's felicitation, appointed 
 Mr. Maukifh to reprefent him at the inftal- 
 ment, by which proxy he obtained the 
 honour of knighthood, and became Sir 
 Mathew Maukifh. This trophy, which 
 generally terminates the vifta of ambition 
 to phyficians, furgeons, painters, and alder- 
 men, did not fatisfy that of Sir Mathew 
 Maukifh : he ardently looked towards fome 
 important office, and had even hopes of 
 obtaining a peerage at no very diftant period. 
 Flattering himfelf that he mould have his 
 two predominant paffions, avarice and am- 
 bition, fully fatisfied. He was difappointed 
 in both ; the firfl cannot be fatisfied, and he 
 was not created a Peer. 
 
 Yet Sir Mathew and his Lady were the 
 two moft afliduous attenders of the levee 
 and drawing-room within the bills of mor- 
 tality. Befides other motives, Sir Mathevc 
 delighted in feeing his own name in the lift, 
 which, for the edification of the public, the 
 compilers of newfpapers exhibit of thofe 
 T 2 who
 
 276 E D W A & D. 
 
 who were prefent at the laft levee : it was a 
 great mortification to him for a confiderable 
 time to find himfelf neglected ; but at 
 length he fell on means to have the name of 
 Sir Mathew Maukifh always inferted among 
 the dijlinguijhed characters who had been at 
 court the preceding day, and Lady Maukifh 
 had every article of her drefs mentioned 
 after every birth- day. 
 
 But finding that all this perfonal affiduity, 
 joined to the influence of his wife's rela- 
 tions and his own parliamentary talents, 
 produced not the defired effect ; perceiving 
 that one batch of Peers was created after 
 another, without any notice being taken of 
 him ; he loft all patience ; fwore that the 
 peerage was proftituted in fuch a manner, 
 that it was a difgrace for a gentleman to be of 
 the order ; and that, for his own part, " by 
 God, he was determined never to be a Peer j 
 his Majefty might take it as he pleafed." 
 
 Sir Mathew had obferved pretty ftrong 
 fymptoms of weaknefs in the Adminiftra- 
 tion, which, joined to his ill-humour, deter- 
 mined him to vote with Oppofition and 
 before the end of that very fefiioo, he had 
 
 the
 
 EDWARD. 277 
 
 thepleafure of feeing the party he had joined, 
 eftablifhed in power ; of courfe, all his hopes 
 revived, and his averfion to a peerage 
 abated every moment. But when he thought 
 himfelf in a fair way of obtaining the ob- 
 ject of his wifhes, a new Adminiftration 
 was fuddenly formed ; the party he had 
 joined was turned out ; and he himfelf again 
 ranked among the opponents of Adminiftra- 
 tion ; a fituation very unfuitable to the 
 mind of a fervile worfhipper of power, 
 devoted to any government or any mi- 
 nifter, while the one exifted, or the other 
 kept his place. Thus, by a moft unexpected 
 jumble in politics, Sir Mathew Maukifh, 
 with fome other unfortunate gentleman, 
 whofe political creed was the fame with his, 
 found himfelf at once fhuffled into Oppofi- 
 tion, and obliged to ad contrary to his de- 
 termination and principles. Without one 
 fentiment in- common with the leaders of 
 the party he had joined, and incapable of 
 tailing the fpirit of their converfation, or 
 putting a juft value on their talents, he was 
 under the neceflity of voting with them. 
 T 3 No
 
 278 E D W A R D. 
 
 No man ever more heartily repented any 
 aft of his life than Sir Mathew Maukifh. 
 did that unfortunate fit of anger which 
 made him defert the minifterial banners, and 
 inlift with thofe who had fo little chance of 
 ever having the power to promote his in,- 
 ?ereft,the only motive which, in his opinion, 
 a man of found judgment could have for 
 being of either party, or, indeed, for being in 
 Parliament at all. And when inftances were 
 quoted of men who are actuated by no dif- 
 cernible motive but a regard for the inte- 
 reft of their country, he confidered them, 
 to whichever party they belonged, and 
 whatever their reputation for good fenfe 
 might be, as nearly approaching to ideots. 
 
 Sir Mathew had all poffible inclination 
 to make another wheel, and return to the 
 minifterial party ; but he dreaded the re- 
 fentment of his new friends, and the ridicule 
 with which he well knew they would over- 
 whelm him ; and therefore, although he was 
 determined to quit them, he waited for 
 fome pretext, and in the meanwhile he 
 attended the Houfe lefs punctually than 
 formerly. But on his hinting an intention 
 
 of
 
 D \V A Px D. 279 
 
 ,-af flaying away when a debate very inte- 
 refting to the party was expected ; it ftruck 
 even Lady Bab fo much, that fhe faid, " Do 
 you not rifk forfeiting the friendship of the 
 leaders of Gppofition, if you do not aiFift 
 in promoting their meafures ?" To which 
 Sir Mathew replied, " Of what value, my 
 dear, is the friendship of thcrfe who have 
 nothing to beftow-? As for their meafures 
 though, no doubt, they think them cal- 
 culated to bring themfelves into power ; 
 yet, what is to be expected from men who 
 never accomplish the object they have in 
 view, or having accomplifhed it, allow it 
 to efcape immediately after ? They are 
 the moft unlucky crew that ever ventured 
 on the fame bottom ; they are conflantly 
 in ftorms, or with the wind blowing di- 
 redly in their teeth ; and if, for a won- 
 .der, a gale fhould fpring -up in their fa- 
 vour, when they feem ready to reach their 
 long wi-fhed-for harbour, the wind veers 
 about in an inftant, and puff they are 
 tlown back into the bleak and hoifterous 
 ocean of Oppofition." 
 
 T4 Sir
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 Sir Mathew's difpleafure at both parties 
 gained on his mind daily, until at length de- 
 tefting politics, and out of humour with him- 
 felf, he retired with his Lady to the country 
 in difguft. Few of the fair fex could be lefs 
 calculated than Lady Bab Maukifh to cure a 
 man of difguft ; the ftate of mind, there- 
 fore, in which he left town gained ftrength 
 in the country ; he endeavoured, indeed, 
 to confine his ill- humour to his own family ; 
 but, like the bufmefs of a tallow-chandler, 
 although its effects were ftrongeft at home, 
 yet it became alfo a nuifance to all thq 
 neighbourhood.
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XXIX. 
 
 Their only labour was to kill the time ; 
 
 And labour dire it is, and weary woe. 
 They fit, they loll, turn o'er fome idle rhyme ; 
 
 Then rifing fudden to the glafs they go, 
 Or faunter forth, with tottering flep and flow ; 
 
 This foon too rude an exercife they find ; 
 Strait on the couch their limbs again they throw 
 
 Where hours on hours they fighingly reclin'd, 
 And court the vapoury God foft breathing in the wind, 
 
 THOMSON. 
 
 A/TR. Carnaby Shadow was educated at 
 Weftmin,fter fchool, from which he was 
 in due time fent to Oxford; he foon forgot at 
 the latter all that he had been forced to learn 
 at the former. After continuing three years 
 at the Univerfity, he pafTed two years in the 
 capital, without once thinking of any fettled 
 plan of life, or any body fuggefting to him 
 that any fuch plan was expedient ; for 
 although his fortune was originally confi- 
 derable, he had already contrived to, diffi- 
 pate all that was left by his father in ready 
 3 money ;
 
 .EDWARD. 
 
 money ; his mother's jointure abforbed a 
 great part of his eftate, and he was reduced 
 to a very limited income. It was, therefore* 
 fuggefted to Lady Bab, by a relation of her 
 late hufband, that it would DC highly expe- 
 dient for her fon to adopt fome profeflion. 
 Her Ladyfhip, being ftrongly imprefied 
 with the propriety of this, wrote to her fon 
 to come immediately to Sir Mathew's ho.ufe 
 in the country, as fire had bufinefs of great 
 importance to communicate to him. 
 
 Nothing could be more unfortunately ex- 
 prefTed than this letter, becaufe Carnaby had 
 a kind of horror for the very name of bu- 
 fmefs, particularly if it was of importance ; 
 and betides, he was not very fond of his 
 mother's company, and had a complete 
 abhorrence of Sir Mathew's. 
 
 He therefore made one excufe after ano<- 
 ther for not leaving the town, being deter- 
 mined not to go near them until this bufi- 
 nefs of importance fhouid be terminated. 
 Lady Bab, however, became fo impatient 
 that fhe wrote to inform him, that fmce he 
 could not come to the country, fhe had re- 
 
 folv^d
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 folved to go to town, and would expert that 
 he would meet her on a particular day, 
 which (he mentioned, to fettle the important 
 bufmefe. This terrified Mr. Shadow fo 
 much, that he fet out directly for Bath, 
 defiring the people at his lodgings to lay, 
 that he had gone the day before, and had 
 not received her Ladymip's letter. 
 
 Difappointed of feeing her fon, Lady Bab 
 fent for that relation of her hufband who 
 had firft fuggefted the propriety of Carna- 
 by's applying to fome profeffion. She in- 
 formed him of her errand to town, and at the 
 fame time afked his opinion refpecling the 
 profeffion which it would be moft proper for 
 her fon to adopt. The gentleman mentioned 
 the army as the moft honourable ; adding,that 
 he imagined her Ladylhip mould purchafe 
 an Enfigncy in the guards without delay. To 
 this Lady Bab anfwered, that the fame idea 
 had ftruck herfelf ; but (he und.-rfloo'i that 
 the King was a little too apt of late to lend 
 the guards abroad in time of war, which, 
 had obliged feveral valuable officers to lell 
 put of the army. 
 
 The
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 The gentleman feemed a little furprifed 
 at her Ladyfhip's objection, and hinted, that 
 without feeing fome fervice in the time of 
 war it would be impoffible to acquire the 
 knowledge neceflary for a general officer, 
 which was a rank, no doubt, that fhe ex- 
 peded her fon would attain in due time. 
 
 " I muft afk your pardon," faid Lady 
 Bab ; " I myfelf am acquainted with fome 
 excellent general officers, who never ferved 
 abroad, or in the time of war ; but my fon's 
 going into the army is out of the queftion, 
 lince the original ufe of the guards feems 
 to be quite altered." 
 
 " Pray what does your Ladyfhip think 
 was the original ufe of the guards ?" faid 
 the gentleman. 
 
 " To defend the King and Royal Family 
 at home," replied Lady Bab; " and, there- 
 fore, it was natural to exped: that he in re- 
 turn would prevent them from being ex- 
 pofed to dangers abroad ; but his Majefty, 
 it feems, thinks otherwife, and we muft fub- 
 mit. But as the law is the next honour- 
 able profeffion to the army, I hope my fon 
 will choofe it for his profeflion. Having had
 
 EDWARD. 285 
 
 an Univerfity education, he is, in all re- 
 fpects, fitted for that line of life, in which 
 his family connections can help his promo- 
 tion, as effectually as they could had he 
 chofen the army." 
 
 The gentleman perceiving that her La- 
 dyfhip afked his advice, as is ufual, on a 
 point which fhe had already decided, did 
 not take the trouble to ftate the objections 
 which occurred to him againil her project ; 
 and, in compliance with her requeft, he 
 propofed it to Carnaby on his return to 
 town. 
 
 Although this gentleman put the pro- 
 pofal in the moft favourable light, to render 
 it agreeable to Carnaby, yet, as he could 
 not avoid hinting the neceffity of Ji it dying 
 the law before it could be turned to any ac- 
 count, the youth was fomewhat alarmed; 
 he had been forced to ftudy fo greatly againft 
 his appetite at Weftminfter, that he retained 
 an averfion to it all the time he was at Ox^ 
 ford, and ftill felt a little fqueamifh when 
 the word ftudy was mentioned. 
 
 But on being afterwards aflurect by an 
 ekl chum, that to give him a right to prac-* 
 
 tife
 
 E D W A R D. 
 
 tife law, it was not ftudying, but eating, that 
 was requifite ; that the former was entirely 
 optional, and often omitted by thofe who 
 are called ftudents of the law. What was 
 indifpenfably necefTary was, that he fhould 
 eat commons twelve times; that this mufl 
 take up five years to all who have not been 
 educated in one or other of the Englifh 
 Univerfities ; whereas if they have had that 
 advantage, two years would be deducted, of 
 courfe he might be called to the bar within 
 three years, provided that he paid his quar- 
 terly dues for twelve terms. 
 
 Carnaby was a good deal relieved by this 
 account of the matter, and as he was a little 
 in want of money and expected a fupply 
 from his mother, he vvifhed to conciliate 
 her as much as poflible, and gave her to 
 underftand that he had no objection to the 
 ftudy of law, and was ready to begin when, 
 fhe pleafed. 
 
 Lady Bab was delighted with this in- 
 
 ftance of compliance in her fon : fhe 
 
 immediately caufed the genteeleft chambers 
 
 that could be had to be taken for him. 
 
 1 3 Carnaby
 
 B W A K 0. 
 
 Carnaby mentioned a confiderable fum that 
 would be neceflary to purchafe law books. 
 But Lady Bab had already taken care of 
 that, having procured from an eminent 
 lawyer of her acquaintance an ample lift of 
 books, which .fhe informed her fon were 
 already ordered, and would be fent to his 
 chambers as foon as they could be got 
 ready. This was fomewhat of a difap- 
 pointment to Carnaby, who had no inten- 
 tion to expend on books the whole fum he 
 expected to be advanced for his library. 
 It was fome confolation however when he 
 faw them brought home, and arranged ac- 
 cording to their various ranks on the 
 {helves ; for his mother had ordered them 
 to be all bound in red morocco and mag- 
 nificently guilt, fo that they had more the 
 appearance of a gay afiembly of officers of 
 the guards, all glittering in their full uni- 
 forms, than being related in the fmalleft 
 degree to the fable brotherhood of Weft- 
 minfter-hall. 
 
 When Garnaby did not know what to 
 do with himfelf, which was often the cafe, 
 he fometimes made a journey to Oxford to 
 
 fee
 
 E D W A R D. 
 
 fee his young coufm Clifton, and became ac* 
 quainted with all his companions. Being 
 confiderably older than any of them, and 
 looked on as a man of fafhion, thofe youths 
 were highly flattered by being of the party 
 when he came to pafs ^a day or two with 
 Clifton, who was too apt to be enticed to 
 return the vifit, and fometimes perfuaded 
 Edward to accompany them to the capita^ 
 where Carnaby made them acquainted with 
 companions far more dangerous than him- 
 felf. 
 
 At the Univerfity, Carnaby had been con- 
 fidered as one of the beft-natured fellows in 
 the world ; he feemed to have no object 
 nor will of his own, but continually agreed 
 to whatever was propofed by others ; and 
 when no one was at hand to fuggeft what 
 ihould be done, he lounged from one place 
 to another, fo entirely devoid of thought, 
 that when he returned home he could no 
 more give any account of where he had 
 been than if his legs had walked away with 
 his head and body, without confulting the 
 former in the leaft .on the fubjedt. This 
 indolence and indifference extended even to 
 
 his
 
 EDWARD. 289 
 
 his drefs which alarmed Lady Bab with the 
 apprehenfion that he would degenerate into 
 a floven. Her Ladyfhip, however, was not 
 allowed to remain long under this dread ; 
 for foon after he came to town, he took a 
 new turn, and from a floven became a fop. 
 Although Carnaby had frequently found 
 time a great load at the Univerfity,yet on his 
 firft coming to London he thought it equally 
 oppreffive ; for it had been reprefented to 
 him, that eating and keeping terms were not 
 all that was neceflary to give the reputation 
 of knowledge in the law ; that it was alfo 
 incumbent on him, at certain feafons of the 
 year, to remain feveral hours every day in 
 his chambers ; and, as often as any body 
 called for him, to be found with two or 
 three large law folios open on the table be- 
 fore him. This Carnaby thought fo intoler- 
 able a flavery, that although he was aflured 
 of its being the univerfal practice, he never 
 fubmitted to it, except when he knew that 
 Lady Maukifli was in town, becaufe ihe was 
 apt to carry her acquaintance to admire the 
 library and learning of her fon. But as foon 
 VOL. i. u as
 
 2 9 o E D \V A R D. 
 
 as he knew that fhe had fet out for the 
 country, he neglected his folios, and turned 
 his attention to drefs. 
 
 A bias to this kind of foppery is a mis- 
 fortune to a mind of any vigour, which is 
 capable of being turned to objects of im- 
 portance ; but to a mind entirely relaxed 
 by indolence it may rather be an advantage, 
 by warding off wearinefs, and precluding a 
 tafte for drinking or other pernicious re- 
 fources. It certainly helped Carnaby to 
 get over many an hour which hung 
 heavy on his hands; for the accuracy and 
 minutenefs with which he attended to all the 
 variations of drefs, as they appeared on the 
 great leaders of famion, were aftonifhing to 
 thofe who were acquainted with his former 
 indifference and inattention. And as foon 
 as he made any new difcovery, whether in 
 the height of the cape of the frock, the 
 cut of its fleeve, or in the length of the 
 breeches, he communicated it to his own 
 taylor, by whofe rapid induftry, although 
 Carnaby was merely a copier, he fometimes 
 pafl"ed for the original inventor. And as 
 
 boots
 
 EDWARD. 291 
 
 boots and buckfkin breeches are eflential 
 articles in a Britifh coxcomb's wardrobe, he 
 was profufely provided with both ; indeed 
 none of the moft eminent collectors of the 
 age, a few perfons of high rank and fortune 
 excepted, furpafled him in the variety of 
 Twitches, horfe-whips, fhoe-buckles, fhirt- 
 pins, feals, and watch chains, which adorned 
 his mufeum. The hair-drefTer, with the help 
 of the fportfman's calender and Harris's lift, 
 cleared him without a great deal of yawning 
 of two hours immediately before dinner; 
 after which he was feldom at a lofs, having 
 the play-houfe or opera till eleven at night, 
 and Ranelagh or the tavern until three in the 
 morning, when he was not engaged to 
 fome ball or private dance, to which and 
 to dinner he received frequent invitations; 
 which, with the cards of his vifitors, were 
 attentively placed on his chimney, fuch as 
 were graced with titles being confpicuoufly 
 muftered in the front, while the lower 
 order occupied the center and rear ranks. 
 
 u 2
 
 292 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XXX. 
 
 Creatures of every kind but ours 
 Will comprehend their natural powers ; 
 While we, whom reafon ought to fway, 
 Miitake our talents every day. SWIFT. 
 
 /CLIFTON and Edward happened to be at 
 Carnaby's chamber one day, when 
 Lady Bab Maukifh entered. Clifton had 
 always been a great favourite with her La- 
 dyfhip ; but flie had heard, with indigna- 
 tion, that he had formed an intimacy with 
 a youth of low birth, and had intended to 
 take the firft opportunity of remonftrating 
 with him on the impropriety of fuch an 
 improper connection ; but when Clifton 
 prefented Edward to her, fhe was fo (truck 
 with the beauty and fymmetry of his face 
 and perfon, that me changed her refolution, 
 and engaged all the three to dine with her 
 the day following ; and afterwards made 
 Clifton promife to vifit her in the country, 
 
 and
 
 EDWARD. 293 
 
 and bring his friend with him, as foon as 
 they could leave the Univerfity for a week 
 or two. 
 
 The two youths went foon after, and 
 were accompanied by Carnaby ; they were 
 received with kindnefs by Lady Bab, and 
 with the appearance of it by Sir Mathew, 
 who thought it his intereft to pay refped; 
 to one of Clifton's family, and on his ac- 
 count was alfo civil to Edward. Although 
 Sir Mathew lived at no great diftance from 
 Mr. Barnet's family, they were little ac- 
 quainted ; he defpifed Barnet as a mere cit, 
 unconnected with people of quality but at 
 prefent Sir Mathew had a point to carry 
 in the country, in which he had no hopes 
 of fucceeding, if Barnet, whofe intereft was 
 more affected by it than that of any other, 
 fhould oppofe him. This circumftance Sir 
 Mathew communicated to his Lady, and 
 they directly began to cultivate an acquaint- 
 ance with Mr. and Mrs. Barnet, which 
 grew to fome degree of intimacy. 
 
 Sir Mathew invited them to dinner, while 
 
 Clifton and Edward were with him. Mifs 
 
 Barnet had left her boarding-fchool fome 
 
 u 3 time
 
 294 E D \V A R D. 
 
 time before, but fhe was at this period at 
 Brighton with Mrs. Temple, who had 
 gone there on account of her health. 
 Carnaby alfo happened to be abfent from 
 this dinner, which gave Lady Maukifh 
 more freedom to expatiate on the pro- 
 mifing tale- : ts and high expectations of 
 her fon, and the figure he was likely to 
 make as a lawyer and ftatefman ; this was 
 & favourite topic with her Ladyfhip. 
 
 Mr. Barnet happened to obferve, " that 
 if he fhould turn out to be a good lawyer, 
 there was no need of his being a ftatefman 
 alfo." 
 
 " It is of importance, however," faid Sir 
 Mathew, " to a man who is in Parliament 
 to be at the fame time of a profeffion, be- 
 caufe that circumftance can do him no 
 harm while his friends are in power, and 
 may be of great ufe," added he, with a figh, 
 u in cafe they fhould, by any curfed acci- 
 dent, be turned out." 
 
 " What is the beft profeffion, do you 
 think, for a ftatefman to be of?*' faid Mr, 
 Barnet. 
 
 "No
 
 EDWARD. 295 
 
 " No profeffion is fo lucrative as the law," 
 anfwered Sir Mathew. 
 
 " I beg your pardon," rejoined Mr. 
 Barnet ; " the mercantile is as lucrative at 
 lead." 
 
 " The mercantile leads to riches, but not 
 to honours," faid Lady Maukilh. 
 
 " It is a great honour to be rich, an pleaie 
 your Ladyfhip," faid Mr. Barnet. 
 
 " I was juft going to fay fo," added Sir 
 Mathew. 
 
 " But it is ftill greater honour," rejoined 
 Lady Maukifh, " both to be rich, and Lord 
 Chancellor of England." 
 
 " I do not fully perceive," faid Mr. 
 Barnet, after ruminating a little, " how the 
 Lord Chancellor (begging your Ladyfhip' s 
 pardon) conies to be introduced at pre- 
 fent." 
 
 " I made the obfervation, Mr. Barnet," 
 replied Lady Maukifh, " becaufe my fon is 
 to be immediately called to the bar ; and 
 confidering his connections and abilities, 
 there can be little doubt, fooner or later, of 
 his arriving at that dignity ; which proves 
 u 4 that
 
 296 EDWARD. 
 
 that the profeffion of law is preferable for 
 him." 
 
 <c Pufh round the bottle, Mr. Worm- 
 wood," faid Sir Mathew, a little out of 
 countenance, and wifhing to change the 
 fubjecT; of difcourfe. 
 
 " I beg leave to drink the health of my 
 Lord Chancellor Garnaby Shadow," faid 
 Mr. Wormwood filling a bumper. 
 
 Obfervingthatfome relations of Carnaby's 
 who were prefent, feemed ftill more uneafy 
 than Sir Mathew ; and that Mr. Wormwood 
 was fliarpening all the weapons of his ri- 
 dicule, Mrs. Barnet put her hufband in 
 mind that they had a good way to drive, 
 and had beft order the carriage." 
 
 They fet out a little after, and were ac- 
 companied in the coach by Mr. Worm- 
 wood. 
 
 . What Lady Maukifh had faid refpeding 
 the profeffion of the law had made a ftrong 
 impreffion on the mind of Mr. Barnet; 
 after a pretty long filence, he afked his wife 
 abruptly, " If fhe did not think that the 
 bufmefs of a lawyer was one of the beft that 
 a young man could be bred to ?" 
 
 7 It
 
 EDWARD. 297 
 
 It ftruck Mrs. Barnet at the inftant, that 
 her hufband's queftion regarded Edward, as 
 Mr. Barnet had, on former occafions, 
 fpoken to her refpecting the profeffion he 
 ought to be bred to ; but me had, with her 
 ufual addrefs, procraftinated any decifion 
 on that head, until he fhould have remained 
 a fufficient time at the Univerfity, which 
 being now accomplished, fhe anfwered," that 
 the bufmefs of a lawyer was one of the heft 
 that a young man could follow, provided that 
 he was thoroughly well educated, of quick 
 parts, and capable of ftrong application." 
 
 " I am precifely of the fame way of 
 thinking," refumed Mr. Barnet ; " which 
 makes me very much repent my not having 
 followed that profeffion myfelf, according to 
 my grandmother's advice." 
 
 Mrs. Barnet was fo much dunned with 
 this obfervation, that (he could hardly draw 
 her breath. Her hufband continued : 
 
 " If I had entered at the Temple when 
 my grandmother firft propofed it, I fhould 
 have certainly been at this moment Chief 
 Juftice of the Common Pleas, inftead of 
 the prefent Chief Juftice." 
 
 " Without
 
 E D W A R D. 
 
 " Without difputing the probability of 
 the thing," faid Mr. Wormwood, " I do 
 not lee the abfolute certainty of it, even al- 
 though you had taken your grandmother's 
 advice." 
 
 Mr. Wormwood had no fooner finifhed his 
 obfervation, than Mrs. Barnet threw him 
 fuch a look of difapprobation as determined 
 himtofupprefs his farcafmsand irony for the 
 reft of the journey ; for he had the higheft 
 refpect for her, and was unwilling to dif- 
 oblige her. 
 
 But Mr. Barnet diredlyanfwered," I muft 
 of courfe have been Chief Juftice before 
 him, becaufe he did not enter as a ftudent 
 at any of the Inns of Court until a full 
 year after my grandmother propofed that I 
 fhould." 
 
 Perceiving figns of diftrefs in his wife's 
 countenance, " I fee, my dear," continued 
 Mr. Barnet, " that this makes you uneafy, 
 and therefore I am forry I mentioned it, 
 and will endeavour never to mention or 
 put you in mind of it again ; although I 
 muftconfefs that it is curfedly provoking to 
 reflect that I have loft fo good a place, 
 
 merely
 
 EDWARD. 299 
 
 merely by a little childiih obftinacy ; for I am 
 told that an exceeding good falary is annex- 
 ed to the office of Chief Juftice ; and every 
 body knows that a Judge has nothing to do 
 but to fit on a cumion and deliver his opi- 
 nion, which, be it right or wrong, nobody 
 dares contradict ; befides, no fet of men 
 live better than your Judges, as I myfelf 
 can atteft, having fometimes dined with 
 them at the aflizes," 
 
 Mrs. Barnet being unable, arid Worm- 
 wood afraid to fpeak, a confiderable filence 
 enfued 3 at length Barnet refumed. 
 
 " Pray, my dear, was it not for a public 
 oration that Edward obtained one of the 
 gold medals, when he was at fchool ?" 
 
 " The laft he got," replied Mrs. Barnet, 
 " was for a Latin oration, which was much 
 admired." 
 
 " Well," refumed Mr. Barnet, " itjlands 
 to reafan that he could make Englifh ora- 
 tions fully as well, and for them, inftead of 
 two or three gold medals, he may get two 
 or three thoufand golden guineas, perhaps, 
 in one year.*' 
 
 s " I do
 
 5 oo EDWARD. 
 
 " I do not know what you mean, my 
 dear," faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " I mean," replied her hufband, " that 
 Edward had beft become a lawyer, and make 
 orations in Weftminfter-Hall. I am con- 
 vinced he will fucceed every bit as well as 
 Mr. Garnaby Shadow, for all Lady Bab's 
 boafting." 
 
 " I am convinced of that alfo, my dear," 
 faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " Then it does not fignify talking," re- 
 joined her hufband, " Edward fhall begin 
 to ftudy the law without more delay ; for 
 who knows, my dear, but that he may ob- 
 tain the promotion I miffed, and thereby be 
 enabled to reimburfe me for all the expence 
 I have been at on his account." 
 
 Barnet had a fincere regard for Edward ; 
 nobody's company gave him more fatis- 
 fa&ion, and Mrs. Barnet found little diffi- 
 culty in making him advance all the money 
 neceflary for the youth's education and ex- 
 pences ; yet the native meannefs of Barnet' s 
 mind was ever apt to difcover itfelf, in fpite 
 of all the pains his wife took to give him a 
 
 more generous way of thinking. 
 
 Perceiving
 
 EDWARD. 301 
 
 Perceiving that fhe blufhed at what he 
 had laft faid, he immediately added, " Do 
 not imagine that I grudge the expence I 
 have been at on Edward's account; I only 
 fay, my dear, that it would be zfatisfaftlon 
 if he were in a fituation to enable him to 
 fhew his gratitude." 
 
 " It is impoflible to be more grateful than 
 he is," faid Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " That I would ri{k my life upon," added 
 Wormwood. 
 
 " I do not difpute it," rejoined Barnet ; 
 " though I muft confefs that I have known 
 people who profefled a vaft deal of gratitude 
 as long as they were unable to make any 
 return for the benefits they had received, 
 and yet feemed to have very little when 
 they had it in their power to repay them." 
 
 " I am certain that our Edward is not of 
 that difpofition," faid Mrs. Barnet, with 
 earneftnefs, 
 
 " I hope not," replied her hufband, " and 
 I do not think he is ; all that I fay is, that it 
 will be a fatlsfaftion to me, and alfo to you, I 
 dare to fay, to fee him repay the whole ex- 
 pence we have been, at on his account, in- 
 cluding
 
 302 E D W A R D. 
 
 eluding the lawful intereft, becaufe that 
 would put his gratitude out of doubt ; 
 and after all, it would detract nothing from 
 my generofity, fince I could not be pofi- 
 tively certain when I advanced the money 
 on his account, whether he ever would 
 have the power and inclination to repay me 
 
 or not." 
 
 I will anfwer for the inclination," cried 
 Mrs. Barnet. 
 
 " Truly, my dear," replied herhufband, 
 " if. he has not the power, the inclination is 
 a mere matter of moonmine ; for [which 
 realbn, if he never has the one, I {hall 
 not trouble you, nor any body elfe, to be- 
 come refponfible for the other." 
 
 When they came home, Mrs. Barnet went 
 directly to her own apartment, and left the 
 two gentlemen feated in the parlour. 
 
 " I mould be glad to know, my good 
 friend/' faid Wormwood, " whether you do 
 not feel very comfortable, when you reflect 
 on the fervices you have rendered to fo 
 fine a young man as Edward ?" 
 
 14 To be fure I do," aiifwered Barnet ; 
 
 " I have felt fomething of that nature almoft 
 
 14 every
 
 EDWARD. 303 
 
 every day fmce my wife firft brought him 
 to the houfe." 
 
 " Perhaps you have had nearly as much 
 fatisfaction in fuch reflections, as in the re- 
 colletion of the mod magnificent dinner 
 you ever gave ?" 
 
 " A great deal more," replied Barnet ; 
 " for I recollect having given magnificent 
 dinners to people I hate." 
 
 " Poffibly," continued Wormwood, " the 
 reflections I allude to have been as com- 
 fortable to you as even the befl dinner you 
 ever eat yourfelf." 
 
 " I cannot fay quite fo much as that," re- 
 plied Barnet ; " becaufe nothing can be fo 
 comfortableas a good dinner while one is 
 eating it ; though it fometimes lies a little 
 heavy on the ftomach after it is over ; 
 whereas the reflections you mention makes 
 one's heart the eafier and lighter the longer 
 they continue.'* 
 
 " The wifeft thing we can do then, my 
 friend," faid Wormwood, " is, to lay in 
 {lore that kind of nourishment which ^is 
 the moftpleafant of digeftion." 
 
 Edward
 
 304 EDWARD. 
 
 Edward himfelf had, like moft youths at 
 a certain age, an inclination for the army, 
 and had given Mrs. Barnet fome hints to 
 that purpofe ; but fhe being averfe to that 
 plan, did not encourage it, and he loft hopes 
 of it fo much, that when the fcheme of his 
 ftudying law was propofed to him, as the 
 moft agreeable to Mr. and Mrs. Barnet, he 
 exprefled no reludtance, although he was by 
 no means fond of the profeflion.
 
 EDWARD, 305 
 
 CHAP. XXXL 
 
 Virtue may be affail'd, but never hurt ; 
 Surpriz'd by unjuft force, but not enthrall'd; 
 Yea even that which mifchief meant moft harm, 
 Shall in the happy trial prove moft glory; ; 
 But evil on itfelf jhall back recoil. 
 
 , If this fail, 
 
 The pillar'd firmament is rottennefs, 
 
 And earth's bafe built on ftubble. MILTON. 
 
 AN occurrence took place a little before 
 this period, which did much honour to 
 Edward. 
 
 He had been long fond of the exercife of 
 fkating, in which, as in moft others, he dif- 
 played uncommon addrefs. While he was 
 indulging himfelf in this amufement, with 
 many others, the ice broke under one young 
 man at a place where the water was deep 
 enough to have drowned him ; all who 
 were near him fled immediately to the 
 fhore. Edward, at fome diftance, and with 
 the graceful rapidity of the feathered mer- 
 VOL. i. X cury,
 
 D W A R D. 
 
 cury, was gliding over the furface when he 
 faw the confufion, and heard an exclama- 
 tion, that young Lord Fillagree would cer- 
 tainly be drowned. He immediately checked 
 his courfe, and then moved towards the 
 youth, whom he beheld holding by the edge 
 of the ice, and ftruggling to extricate him- 
 felf ; but as often as he made an effort to 
 get out of the water, the ice broke, and he 
 again fell in. Several who obferved Ed- 
 ward's intention called to him not to pro- 
 ceed, for if he did, he could only lofe his 
 own life, without faving the other's. Not- 
 withftanding this prudent advice, he per- 
 fifted in advancing towards the young man, 
 who defpairing of the fuccefs of his own 
 efforts, kept his hands and arms above the 
 found part of the ice, and cried loudly and 
 incefTantly for affiftance. As Edward ap- 
 proached, he begged him to be filent, and 
 then holding his handkerchief by one 
 corner, he threw the other to Fillagree, 
 at the fame time extending his arm to the 
 utmoft, that he might keep the weight of 
 his own body as far as poflible from the 
 broken part of the ice, and that the found 
 
 might
 
 EDWARD. 307 
 
 might have the better chance" of fuftaining 
 the youth when he fhould get upon it. At 
 that inftant a failor, who had not before 
 been on the ice, but viewed the fcene from 
 the fhore, ran towards Edward, calling 
 " avaft, avaft, brother ; the fliders on which 
 you ftand have no hold j that fqualling lub* 
 her is more likely to drag you to the bottom 
 than you to heave him above board^ or tow 
 him afhore ; catch faft hold of this here 
 with your larboard hand.'* So faying, he 
 jerked the end of a piece of rope to Edward, 
 while he himfelf flood firm on the ice, hold- 
 ing the other end, " Now, boys, bear & 
 haiuV' cried he ; " hilloa, pull away." It 
 now appeared that the weakeft parts 
 of the ice had been already broken by 
 the repeated exertions of the young 
 Lord ; for when by a new effort he got 
 above the ice it did not give way; and 
 holding by the end of the handkerchief, he 
 was pulled to a fafe part of the ice by Evi- 
 len and the failor. The latter, after con- 
 templating the young Lord with a look cf 
 contempt, faid, " Zounds, what afqualling, 
 you did make, friend; d n me if I have 
 X 2 not
 
 308 EDWARD. 
 
 not feen a whole fhip's crew go to the bot- 
 tom with lefs noife than came from your 
 {ingle jaw-port." 
 
 Edward could not help laughing at this 
 fpeech of the failor. Whether it was the 
 fhivering condition in which Lord Fillagree 
 was that deprived him of recollection, or 
 his being offended at the failor' s fpeech and 
 Edward's laughing, cannot be known, but 
 he certainly went away with all the expe- 
 dition he could, and without faying a word 
 to either. 
 
 Edward then, fhaking the failor by the 
 hand, offered him a guinea for his afliftance 
 in faving the young Lord from being 
 drowned. 
 
 " He is not worth the money, by 
 G d," faid the failor. 
 
 Edward begged him to take it. 
 " Well, fmce you infift upon it, matter, 
 I'll accept of your guinea," refumed the 
 failor ; " but on my confcience you have a 
 hard bargain." 
 
 Lord Fillagree went abroad foon after, 
 without waiting on Edward, or ever ex- 
 any fenfe of obligation. 
 
 At
 
 EDWARD. 309 
 
 At that time Edward was involved in a, 
 fpecies of diftrefs which he had hitherto 
 been unacquainted with. A young man 
 happened to be prefent when he received a 
 remittance from Mrs. Barnet to clear off his 
 year's accounts, and fupply him with mo- 
 ney for the immediate exigencies of the pre- 
 fent term. This youth earaeflly applied to 
 Edward for the ufe of the whole, on a 
 plaufible pretext, and with the ftrongeft 
 aflurances of repaying it within a certain 
 time. Edward relying upon this, entrufted 
 him with the whole ; but two days be- 
 fore the term of repayment, the borrower 
 left the Univerfity in many people's debt. 
 This event afflicted Edward very much. 
 Several tradefmen had given in their ac- 
 counts, with intimation, that they were 
 in great need of the money. When he 
 reflected on the generofity which Mrs. 
 Barnet had always (hewn in regulating 
 his allowance, it augmented his diftrefs ; 
 he felt the greateft reluctance from commu- 
 nicating this affair to her j he would have 
 applied with lefs uneafmefs to Clifton, but 
 X on
 
 5 io EDWARD. 
 
 on his firft going to the Univerfity, fhe had 
 advifed him never to borrow money from 
 his fellow-ftudents. Befides, Clifton had 
 been for fome time at the houfe of the Earl 
 of Frankvil, to whom he was related. As 
 Oxford was on the road between this noble- 
 man's houfe and the capital, he always fent 
 for Clifton as he patted, arid the youth had 
 prefented Edward to him ; in confequence 
 of which, and of the ftile in which Clifton 
 fpoke of his companion, Edward had bee?i 
 invited with Clifton to Frankvil-houfe. This 
 invitation he had declined. 
 
 When Clifton returned, he a flu red Ed- 
 ward that he was a prodigious favourite 
 with the Earf, who had heard of his adven- 
 ture with Lord Fillagree. " Notwithstanding 
 his regret that the puppy was not drowned," 
 added Qifton, " the Earl admires your con- 
 duel; exceedingly, and he told me in exprefs 
 terms that I fhould not be a welcome gueft 
 at Frankvil-houfe, unlefs I took you with 
 me ; and repeatedly in the hearing of a 
 pretty numerous company expreffed a 
 ftrong inclination to ferve you; and what 
 
 he
 
 EDWARD. 311 
 
 he exprefled I am fure he fihcerely wimes 
 to have an opportunity of performing, for 
 he is in all refpe&s a man of honour." 
 
 While the two friends were talking on 
 this fubject, a letter was delivered to Ed- 
 ward. He &ewed marks of indignation 
 while he read it. 
 
 " That epiftle does not feem of an agree- 
 able tenor," faid Clifton. 
 
 *' Yet it relates to Lord Frankvil and you," 
 replied Edward, handing him the letter 
 which Clifton read as follows : 
 
 "SlR, 
 
 " This will inform you that the living- of 
 . i is juft become vacant ; it is in the 
 
 gift of the Earl of Frankvil. The writer here- 
 of is willing to pay into your hands the 
 ium of 500!. provided you will ufe all your 
 influence with his Lordmip to beftow that 
 living on a certain clergyman of great piety 
 uad learning, who will be mentioned to 
 you. You mall have fecurity, I fay, that 
 jcol. will be paid to you upon the above 
 clergyman being appointed to the living; 
 and 200!. mall be advanced to you imme- 
 diately, provided you make an earneft ap- 
 x 4 plication
 
 312 EDWARD. 
 
 plication for this purpofe, and engage his 
 Lordmip's relation, the Honourable Mr. 
 Clifton, to join in the fame. 
 
 " If you approve of this, direct a line to 
 
 A. B. at the coffee -houfe, to be left 
 
 till called for. Mention where and when 
 you can be fpoken with by a friend of the 
 writer of this. Secrecy and honour may 
 be relied on." 
 
 " I am fure that I have feen this man's 
 writing before," faid Clifton, when he had 
 finifhed ; and I have a very ftrong fufpicion 
 that this pious epiftle is the production of a 
 certain obfequious gentleman who only left 
 this Univerfity laft year. I forget his name ; 
 he who made up fo much to me, and whom 
 you may remember I could never endure. 
 On fame pretence or other, however, he 
 called on Lord Frankvil, and was kept to 
 dinner on the very day when his Lordfhip 
 exprefTed fo much regard for you. He 
 ought to be expofed." 
 
 " The real writer of this letter deferves 
 to be expofed," replied Edward ; " but as 
 by making any noife on this fubjedt we 
 
 rifk
 
 EDWARD. 3I3 
 
 rifk throwing a fufpicion on a man who 
 perhaps is incapable of fuch bafenefs, this 
 is the beft way of difpofmg of it." So 
 faying, he took up the letter and threw it 
 in the fire. 
 
 " Well," faid Clifton ; but might not 
 fome good be extracted from this informa- 
 tion ? Have you no friend whom you 
 might recommend to his Lordmip on this 
 occafion ?" 
 
 " I have no right to think that his Lord- 
 (hip would mind my recommendation ; but 
 I have a friend to whom I lie under the 
 ftrongeft of all obligations. I would go to 
 the Indies to ferve him ; he is a man who 
 would do honour to any patronage." 
 
 " You mean Mr. Temple," faid Clifton. 
 
 " I certainly do," replied Edward ; " and 
 you cannot conceive what a pleafure you 
 would do me by applying to my Lord 
 for " 
 
 " I will do what you pleafe," replied 
 Clifton ; " but can tell you beforehand, 
 that his Lordmip will not have the fmalleft 
 fcruple or ceremony in refufmg me ; where- 
 as,
 
 3H EDWARD. 
 
 as, if you make the application, in the hu- 
 mour he is in, I do believe you have a great 
 chance of fucceeding." 
 
 Edward, however, flill thought he could 
 not with propriety addrefs my Lord on fuch 
 a fubjedt; but he at laft agreed, on condi-* 
 tion that Clifton would join him in the ap- 
 plication. No anfwer came from his Lord- 
 fhip for three weeks, and Edward was 
 uneafy in the thoughts of having yielded to 
 his friend's importunity. At length Clifton 
 received a letter from Lord Fraqkvil in the 
 following terms; 
 
 " There are many things in which your 
 opinion, my dear Jack, would have great 
 vreight with me ; but I confefs that in 
 choofing a clergyman I mould not have 
 thought of afking it. When I exprefTed a 
 defire of ferving your friend Edward, I 
 literally meant himfelf, and not another at 
 his recommendation ; however, in confe- 
 quenceof your conjunct letter, I have made 
 inquiry refpeding Mr. Temple, of whom I 
 have received fo excellent a character, that 
 I fhall write to him in a few days to inform 
 
 him
 
 EDWARD. .,, 
 
 him of his appointment. As I now con- 
 fider the recommending of fuch a man as a 
 fervice done to myfelf, you will inform 
 Edward that my inclination to be of fervice 
 to him is increafed by this appointment. 
 
 " Yours, very fincerely, 
 
 " FRANKVIL." 
 
 A very fhort time after this letter had 
 been read to Edward, he took poft for 
 Frankvil-houfe, to thank the Earl for fo 
 great a mark of regard ; and at the fame 
 time to beg of his Lordmip to conceal from, 
 Mr. Temple whatever part Edward himfelf 
 had taken in the bufniefs, 
 
 " Why fhould you preclude him from the 
 pleafure of knowing who are his friends ?" 
 faid the noble Lord. 
 
 <c He knows very well," replied Edward, 
 " that it is the pride of my life to be con- 
 fidered as his friend ; but I have a ftrong 
 reafon for wifhing that he fhould not know 
 that I ever prefumed to mention him to 
 your Lordfhip." 
 
 The
 
 316 EDWARD. 
 
 The noble Lord then aflured him that it 
 fliould be as he defired. 
 
 Edward's reafon was founded on an idea 
 that Mr. Temple might be a little hurt in 
 having it believed that he was indebted for 
 this piece of good fortune to the recommend- 
 ation of an obfcure youth ; and that it 
 would afford him fatisfa&ion to think he 
 derived it from the influence of his own 
 reputation on the mind of the Earl.
 
 EDWARD. 317 
 
 CHAP. XXXII. 
 
 Dullnefs with tranfport eyes the lively dunce, 
 Rememb'ring fhe herfelf was pertnefs once. 
 
 POPE. 
 
 CJIR Mathew Maukifh and his Lady con- 
 tinued to cultivate the acquaintance of 
 Mr. and Mrs. Barnet with the greateft affi- 
 duity ; it was more difficult for her Lady- 
 fhip to fucceed with Mrs. Barnet than 
 for Sir Mathew to gain on the mind of her 
 hufband. What rendered Lady Maukilh's 
 company more agreeable, however, than it 
 otherwife would have been to Mrs. Bar- 
 net, was the favourable manner fhe always 
 fpoke of Edward, who had now left the 
 Univerfity, and had chambers in the Terri- 
 ple. He pafled moft of the recefs at Mr. 
 XBarnet's houfe in the country, and Lady 
 Maukifli's vifits were more frequent while 
 he was there than at other times. Her La- 
 dyfhip often recommended to the youth to 
 cultivate the acquaintance of her fon, who, 
 7 from
 
 5 i8 EDWARD, 
 
 from his fuperior knowledge and experi* 
 ence, fhe obeferved, would be an ufeful ad* 
 vifer to a young man juft beginning the ftudy 
 of law ; and to Mr. Barnet fhe hinted, that 
 Carnaby's talents and connections would 
 fpeedily raife him to fituations in which he 
 might be of great ufe to Edward. She 
 exprefled, however, fome regret that her 
 fon had unfortunately neglected being called 
 to the bar, which he was entitled to have 
 been at the preceding term, and enjoined 
 Edward to put him in mind, when he re- 
 turned to town, to take the neceflary fteps 
 for that purpofe at the enfuing one. 
 
 When Edward returned to London, he 
 called one day on his friend Clifton, with 
 whom he found Mr. Carnaby Shadow, 
 who immediately propofed that they fhould 
 dine together at a tavern ; Clifton readily 
 aflented ; and Carnaby faid, that as he was 
 on his way to Hyde-Park, he fhould order 
 dinner at the tavern as he pafled. He then 
 left them, and mounted his horfe, which 
 was at the door, and which being a new 
 15 purchafe,
 
 EDWARD. 319 
 
 purchafe, be was impatient to exhibit in the 
 ftreets and in the Park. 
 
 " What an eafy tempered good-natured 
 fellow he is," faid Edward. 
 
 " But wonderfully infipid in a morn- 
 ing," faid Clifton. 
 
 " I obferve that you are more apt to pufh 
 the bottle when he is in company, than at 
 other times," faid Edward ; " you are never 
 at reft till you get him half tipfy." 
 
 " Certainly," replied Clifton ; "and don't 
 you know the reafon ?" 
 
 " I cannot fay I do, 5 ' anfwered Edward. 
 
 " Becaufe," faid Clifton, " fmall-beer, 
 when brifk and frothy, is fometimes agree- 
 able enough ; but when flat, there is no 
 fwallowing it." 
 
 When they met at dinner, and when Mr. 
 Shadow had attained what Clifton thought, 
 his moft amufmg point, Edward, recollect- 
 ing Lady Bab's injunction, told him, that 
 his mother was impatient for his appearance 
 at the bar as a Counfellor. 
 
 " To tell you a fecret," faid Carnaby, " I 
 would juft as foon appear at the bar as a 
 prifoner.' T 
 
 " That
 
 320 E D W A R D. 
 
 "That is a fecret, which I confefs I 
 fhould not have expeded from one of the 
 profeflion you have chofen." 
 
 " D n the profeffion !" cried Carnaby; 
 " it was none of my choofmg ; I hate it 
 mortally." 
 
 " What reafon can you have for fo ftrong 
 an averfion ?" 
 
 " What reafon ! What reafon !" repeated 
 Carnaby ; " a very good, a very folid rea- 
 fon." 
 
 " That I mould expet, of courfe," faid 
 Edward. 
 
 " Clearly," added Clifton, " as it has fo 
 much weight with you ! but, after all, on 
 what is it founded ?" 
 
 " On what is it founded !" exclaimed 
 Carnaby ; " why on thofe curfed eternal 
 periwigs which Counfellors are obliged to 
 wear in all weathers, when they appear at the 
 bar ; no confideration on earth could pre- 
 vail on me to make myfelf look fo like a 
 gigg j and if I were willing, I don't believe 
 my head could fupport one of thofe hideous 
 periwigs for an hour together." 
 
 "You
 
 EDWARD. -2i 
 
 o 
 
 ' You think then," faicl Clifton, " that to 
 be a lawyer it is neceflary to hare a very 
 ftrong head." 
 
 " Whatever is necefTary, my averfion to 
 thofe d d periwigs is unfurmountable." 
 
 " That is unlucky," faid Edward, " con- 
 fidenng what Lady Maukifh has in view for 
 you.'* 
 
 " True," cried Clifton ; " for if you 
 boggle fo much at the tie-wig of a fimple 
 counfellor, how could you fupport that 
 enormous weight of periwig which the 
 head of every Chancellor of Great Britain 
 is doomed to bear ?" 
 
 " They ihall doom my head to the block 
 fooner," replied Carnaby. 
 
 " Only imagine," rejoined Clifton, " to 
 be awfully feated on a wool-pack, during 
 a whole feffion of parliament." 
 
 " Dreadful !" cried Carnaby. 
 
 <c Seffions after feffions," added Clifton. 
 
 * c Shocking! mocking !" exclaimed Car- 
 naby. 
 
 " Not to mention the chance of a trial 
 by impeachment at Weftminfter-Hall," laid 
 Edward. 
 
 VOL. i. Y ic Name
 
 322 E D \V A R D. 
 
 <l Name it not," cried Carnaby. 
 " There obliged to remain," continued 
 Edward, tl from winter to midfummer, in 
 fight of all manner of perfons^ hearing exa- 
 minations and crofs-examinations, fpeeches 
 and replies, fufficient to confound the 
 cleared head in Chriftendom, even although 
 it were not buried in a voluminous mafs of 
 horfe-hair." 
 
 " Fogh ! Fogh !" cried Carnaby. 
 " He is almoft choaked with the bare 
 idea," faid Clifton. 
 
 " Eh gad, and fo I am!" refumed Car- 
 naby ; " and rather than be fuffocated in 
 that lingering manner, I would choofe to be 
 buried at once in my cool grave." 
 
 " This, however, is fuppofing the word 
 that could happen," refumed Edward ; " for 
 even if you were to proceed in the profeflion 
 of a lawyer, you might poffibly efcape 
 being buried alive in a Chancellor's wig ; at 
 all events I think you ought to make an 
 effort to pleafe your mother, by appearing, 
 for once at lead, in the wig of a Coun- 
 fcllor." 
 
 " Curfc
 
 EDWARD. 323 
 
 " Curfe efforts," cried Carnaby ; " I al- 
 ways detefted them, and never could make 
 one in my life." 
 
 " Forgive me," faid Edward ; " I think 
 I could put you in mind of a very vigorous 
 effort, which Mr. Clifton and I were wit- 
 neffes to your making of your own ac- 
 cord." 
 
 " I do not know what you mean," faid 
 Carnaby. 
 
 " Nor I," added Clifton. 
 
 " Do you not remember," refumed Ed- 
 ward, " our calling one morning at your 
 chambers, when we found you ftruggling, 
 with all your might, to fqueeze yourfelf 
 into a new pair of buckfkin breeches? 
 I am fure I fhall never forget the ftrenuous 
 efforts you made on that occafion." 
 
 " Ay, on that occafion, you {hewed your- 
 felf capable of the moft laudable exertions," 
 rejoined Clifton. 
 
 " The moft pains-taking man on earth 
 could not have pufhed more earneftly to 
 gain a livelihood for himfelf and family," 
 added Edward, " than you did to carry 
 your point on that occafion." 
 
 Y 2 " Yes,"
 
 E D W A R D. 
 
 " Yes," replied Carnaby ; " but that was 
 a different affair." 
 
 " It muft be confefled," added Clifton, 
 " that ftudying law is one thing, and pulling 
 on a pair of 'breeches is another.'* 
 
 "Affuredly," refumed Edward; " for 
 many people drop the one, who wifh to 
 wear the other all their lives." 
 
 " What I meant to fay," replied Carnaby, 
 " was, that ftudying the law is a bore, and 
 difturbs ones head ; whereas 
 
 " Tight breeches," faid Clifton, " pinch 
 elfewhere." 
 
 " I remember, however," rejoined Car- 
 naby, <f that on the occafion you allude to, 
 I was very much puzzled whether to pro- 
 ceed or draw back." 
 
 " Like Macbeth, you recollected," faid 
 Edward, " that 
 
 fhould you wade no more, 
 
 Returning were as tedious as go o'er.
 
 EDWARD. 325 
 
 CHAP. XXXIII. 
 Dangerous Connexions. 
 
 the time that Edward left the Uni- 
 fity he had been principally intent on 
 the ftudy of hiftory, the nature of govern- 
 ment, the fpirit of laws in general, and 
 other kinds of knowledge which are rather 
 preparatory to, than forming a part of the 
 bufmefs of a lawyer. 
 
 His mind being delighted with thefe 
 ftudies, he purfued them with eagernefs and 
 fuccefs. 
 
 But when he came to apply, faimfelf to 
 the ftudy of the municipal law, and the 
 forms of the Courts, he found it more 
 laborious, becaufe lefs entertaining, and he 
 was the more readily led into diffipation. 
 No young man could have more natural eafe 
 and lefs affected wifdom ; his diflike of 
 formality and referve was fometimes made 
 ufe of by his young companions, as a means 
 Y 3 to
 
 326 E D W A R D. 
 
 to feduce him to be of their parties. In 
 general, his good fenfe and fleadinefs ena- 
 bled him to reject their propofals, except 
 when they were fupported by his friend 
 Clifton, whofe fondnefs for humour made 
 him find entertainment in the ridicule as 
 well as the talents of thofe with whom he 
 kept company. As Edward feldom could refift 
 the importunities of Clifton, he fometimes 
 had caufe to repent the exceffes into which 
 he was led, the effeds of which generally 
 extended a day or two beyond that in which 
 they were committed ; fo that one night, 
 difagreeably fpent with Carnaby and his 
 companions, generally loft two days ftudv; 
 to Edward. 
 
 Among Carnaby's mofl intimate com- 
 panions, one was devoted to the bottle, 
 another to play ; the firft, whofe name was 
 Myrtle, had early in life lived two years 
 with a relation in the country, who being 
 an habitual drunkard, had gradually feduced 
 him into frequent intoxication. This 
 young man had once promifed better things. 
 At the time on which he firft went to refide 
 this unfortunate relation, he was of an 
 
 aftive
 
 EDWARD. 327 
 
 active temper, of a moft obliging difpofi- 
 tion, a lover of fincerity, with great natural 
 quicknefs, fome defire of fame, the moft 
 blefled of all difpofitions for a man of for- 
 tune ; becaufe it is the fource of improve- 
 ment, arid the beft prefervative againft that 
 rniferable bane of men of fortune, ennui. Of 
 all the contrivances to exclude this intruding 
 demon from the mind of man, the moft 
 debafmg and deftrudive is, the ufe of in- 
 toxicating liquors ; that pernicious habit 
 blunts all defire of improvement, deadens 
 emulation, obfcures the underftanding, finks 
 the foul into iluggilhnefs, renders men in- 
 fenfible to the love of reputation, familia- 
 rizes them with the idea of contempt, and 
 extinguifties every enjoyment but that 
 maudlin delirium excited by fpirituous li- 
 quors, which foon hurries them to their 
 graves. 
 
 Poor Myrtle was advancing to this de- 
 plorable ftate ; he rofe every morning with 
 a confufed head and heart, filled with re- 
 morfe ; his nerves unftrung, and his temper 
 unfupportable. For thofe complaints he 
 fought a cure in the very fource of his dif- 
 Y4 eafe;
 
 328 EDWARD. 
 
 eafe 5 and did not recover any degree 
 of eafe and good humour until he had 
 lodged a confiderable quantity of flrong li- 
 quor in his ftomach : this proved a moft 
 treacherous palliative ; all his ailments 
 recurring with augmented force the fuc- 
 ceeding day, and requiring an increafed 
 dole to alleviate them. The only comfort- 
 able part of his life, therefore, (if any part 
 of fuch a life could be called comfortable,) 
 began fome time after dinner ; as for the 
 dinner itfelf it afforded him none, fo com- 
 pletely was his appetite deftroyed ; but after 
 a certain number of glailes, his ill-humour 
 gradually diminimed, and as the bottle con- 
 tinued to circulate, he advanced in cheer- 
 fulnefs to a certain point, at which his ideas 
 from gay became confufed, acquiring every 
 moment more and more obfcurity, until he 
 was carried, in a ftate of ftupor, to bed. 
 
 Having thus perverted the faculties of the 
 youth's mind, and blunted all his powers of 
 enjoyment, his obliging relation died, and 
 left him a large eftate to enjoy ; and the 
 young man was often quoted as one of the 
 moft fortunate men m the kingdom. 
 
 Mr.
 
 EDWARD. 329 
 
 Mr. Shuffle was Carnaby's other compa- 
 nion. He in reality hated wine, although 
 he fometimes affected a great difpofition for 
 jolity ; he then promoted drinking, while, 
 with all the addrefs he was matter of, he 
 patted the bottle, and often afiumed the ap- 
 pearance of being fluttered when his fenfes 
 were quite clear, which appeared as foon 
 as the cards or dice were introduced ; but if 
 Uy any accident, in fpite of his caution and 
 addrefs, he felt his memory or prefence of 
 mind difturbed, no intreaty could prevail ga 
 Jjim to play.
 
 350 E D Vv A R D. 
 
 CHAP. XXXIV. 
 
 Nil habet infelix paupertns durius in fe, 
 Quam quod ridiculos ho;nines facit. 
 
 JUVEN. 
 
 . O.rnaby Shadow was a lofer by both 
 his companions; one injured his 
 health, the other his purfe. Although he 
 had no tafte for wine, and difliked gaming, 
 he was in danger of falling a facrihce to 
 both, from a weaknefs he had in common 
 with many better men; namely, an inability 
 of refifting felicitation. Had Mr. Myrtle 
 and Mr. ShurBe been men of" rank, or 
 greatly diftinguifhed as men of famion-, 
 Carnaby would infallibly have become a 
 drunkard or a gamefter ; but as they were 
 neither, he never thought of them when, 
 they were out of his fight, and never fell 
 into their peculiar vices but from their im- 
 portunity. Carnaby had another weaknefs 
 of a lefs dangerous, but a more ridiculous 
 
 nature ;
 
 EDWARD. 331 
 
 nature ; that of imitating the drefs and pe- 
 culiarities of every famionable man with 
 whom he was acquainted. If he happened 
 to pafs a fhort time with a perfon of this 
 defcription who fpoke quick, Carnaby's 
 words were obferved foon after to flow 
 more rapidly than ufual ; and this increafed 
 velocity continued until he met with a 
 more diftinguimed perfon who fpoke flow ; 
 but if that perfon was abfolutely a ftutterer, 
 Garnaby was obferved to take as much pains 
 to check certain words, as his noble model 
 did to pronounce them. He was at one 
 time feized with a convulfive (hake of his 
 head, which lafted near two months ; at 
 another he feemed to be almoft deaf, and 
 was not cured of the affectation till a cer- 
 tain noble Lord had quite recovered his 
 hearing. Carnaby had always {hewn a 
 partiality for red wines ; but on hearing a 
 noble Duke declare that he preferred white, 
 Mr. Shadow, for a confiderable fpace of 
 time, confined himfelf to Sherry and Cham- 
 pagne. Thefe ridicule?, joined to his ex- 
 ceffive good nature, rendered his company 
 highly amufing to Mr. GHfton, whofe en- 
 joyment
 
 3.52 E D W A R D. 
 
 joyment was greatly -increafed when he 
 could pcrfuadc Edward to partake in it. 
 On one occafion, Carriaby having engaged 
 Mr. Clifton to accompany him to certain 
 races, the latter prevailed on Edward to be 
 erf the party. The day after the three 
 young gentlemen had fet out, Mr. Shuffle 
 called at Carnaby's lodgings, and under- 
 Handing from the fervant that on their re- 
 turn from the races they intended to dine 
 at a particular inn on the road, at no great 
 diftance from town, he formed the defign 
 of meeting them there. Without explain- 
 ing his intentions to Mr. Myrtle, he per- 
 fuaded him to accompany him in a vifit to 
 an acquaintance of both, who had a houfe 
 near the fame road, but feveral miles farther 
 from town than the inn in queftion. Mr. 
 Shuffle's fcheme was to meet the three 
 youths at the inn, and to engage them in 
 play after dinner, when Myrtle ihould have 
 warmed them with wine. 
 
 When Mr. Shuffle and Myrtle arrived at 
 the inn, they faw Edward and Carnaby 
 (landing in the court. The latter told them 
 they had juft arrivecj; that Clifton had left 
 
 them
 
 E D W A R D. 33} 
 
 them immediately after the races to vifit a 
 relation, but they expected two other gen- 
 tlemen, for whom they had ordered dinner, 
 and that he hoped Mefirs. Shuffle and Myr- 
 tle would be of the party. Although 
 Shuffle was difappointed when he heard 
 that Clifton was not to come, he exprefled 
 much joy at this accidental rencontre, as he 
 called it, and accepted the invitation. 
 Myrtle went directly to inquire about the 
 wines, and took a glafs of Madeira by way 
 of trial. 
 
 In paying the laft poft, Shuffle finding 
 there was an overplus of nine {hillings, 
 gave it to the two poftillions who had 
 driven Myrtle and him. 
 
 As he ordered this ample recompence 
 with a loud and boafting voice, he was 
 heard by another poftillion who at that in- 
 ftant drove a chaife and pair into the court. 
 A decent looking woman, but whofe fear- 
 tures bore the marks of forrow and adver- 
 fity, ftepped out of the chaife ; me imme- 
 diately inquired if any ftage coach for 
 London was expected to pafs foon ; and 
 
 being
 
 334 E D W A R D. 
 
 being told that one would pafs withvn half 
 an hour, fhe faid that provided there was 
 room fhe would proceed by that conveyance. 
 She then paid the poftillion his fare, and 
 gave him a (hilling for himfelf. The fel- 
 low looking at it fcornfully, faid, with an 
 infolent tone to the lady, " What is this 
 for, miftrefs." To which fhe mildly re- 
 plied, " I am forry, friend, I cannot afford 
 to give you any more at prefent ; for to fay 
 the truth, I have fcarcely money fufficient 
 to clear my expences to London." 
 
 " If I had known as much," retorted the 
 fellow, " damn me if I fhould have driven 
 fo faft. Ay, Jack," continued he, ad- 
 drefiing one of the poftillions who had 
 driven Shuffle and Myrtle, " you have met 
 with two generous gentlemen, but I have 
 picked up a fhiiling b ch, by God." 
 
 " You don't expect always to have the 
 bed luck, do you?" faid the other. " Don't 
 you remember the laft time we met that I 
 received only eighteen pence for driving 
 two officers fixteen miles, and I faw you 
 get half a crown for bringing one maa 
 
 ten." 
 
 13 "What
 
 EDWARD. 335 
 
 " What the devil could you expeft from 
 two beggarly officers in the army ?" refumed 
 the firft poftillion; " whereas the gentleman 
 that I drove that day was a matter butcher 
 in Clare market." 
 
 At the commencement of this dialogue, 
 the lady had walked into the inn. The 
 grooms and footmen who filled the court 
 applauded the pofiillion's wit with loud 
 laughter, in which they were joined by 
 Shuffle and Carnaby. Edward was other- 
 wife affeded. 
 
 Having followed the lady into a parlour, 
 he found her wiping her eyes with her 
 handkerchief. 
 
 " Pray, Madam,^' faid he, " do not al- 
 low the brutality of that fellow to affecl: 
 you too much ; he is really not worth your 
 notice." 
 
 " I know it, Sir," faid the lady ; " and 
 it is not his rudenefs that afie&s me ; but 
 the reflection on my own irreparable mif- 
 fortune, in the lofs of him, who ufed to 
 protect me from fuch infults." Here 
 flie burft anew into tears, and continued 
 
 fpr
 
 F T> W A R D. 
 
 forfome minutes to fob as if her heart were 
 breaking. 
 
 When (he feemed to hax^e recovered her- 
 felf a little, " I hope you will forgive me, 
 Madam," faid Edward,' in the moft refpect- 
 ful manner ; " but I heard you hint that 
 your finances were flender at prefent ; may 
 I beg therefore that you will oblige me by 
 accepting of this trifle, till you are in eafier 
 circumftances." 
 
 The lady, looking with furprize at him, 
 faid, " You are extremely good, Sir ; but I 
 believe I have money enough to carry me 
 to town, where I am not without hopes of 
 getting a fupply e'er it be long." 
 
 " Why fhould you run any rifk, 
 Madam ?" replied he with earneftnefs; 
 " you may not find your friends directly 
 on your arrival ; what I offer is a trifle 
 only five guineas for which I have no 
 immediate ule, and you mall repay them 
 when you pleafe. I earneftly beg your 
 acceptance of them. Pray do, Madam, you 
 will indeed oblige me very much." 
 
 The lady defiring to know to whom flic 
 
 was obliged, and taking his addrefs, at length 
 
 10 yielded
 
 E D W A R D. 337 
 
 yielded to his intreades, and accepted the 
 five guineas. 
 
 When Edward withdrew, to his pleafure 
 and furprife he met Mr. Temple in the paf- 
 fage. That gentleman had arrived fome 
 hours before on his way to London, and 
 had been detained at the inn by an incident 
 that mail be explained in due time. 
 
 While he fat in an upper room, he had 
 heard the laughter of the grooms and foot- 
 men, and on one of the waiters entering, 
 he afked what was the occafion of all that 
 mirth ? " They are laughing," anfwered 
 the fellow, " at a kind of a gentlewoman 
 who is juft arrived in a pod chaife. Scarcely 
 having money enough to hold out the re- 
 maining polls, me could give the poftillion 
 only a milling, which to be fure is a little 
 upon the fhabby order in fuch rainy wea- 
 ther ; and me now fits moping by herfelf, 
 until the arrival of the ftage coach, which 
 to be fure is more fitter, an' pleafe your 
 honour, for fuch fecond-hand gentry, than 
 a poft chaife." 
 
 VOL. i. z Mr,
 
 338 E D W A R D. 
 
 Mr. Temple defired to be fhewn where 
 the Lady Was, in a manner that indicated 
 difpleafure. 
 
 " I meant no offence, pleafe your ho* 
 nour," faid the waiter. " I always refpects 
 the cloth, becaufe they orders the beft of 
 whatever is in the houfe, and fometirnes 
 allows to waiters genteelly." 
 
 Mr. Temple having again defired to be 
 {hewn to the Lady, was informed that a 
 gentleman was with her. Waiting until he 
 could fpeak to her alone, he met Edward, 
 and being at the fame inftant told that the 
 Lady was difengaged, he defired Edward 
 to wait a few minutes for him in another 
 room. Mr. Temple himfelf then went to- 
 the parlour in which the Lady was, and in 
 the moft delicate terms made her an offer of 
 the fame nature with that which he had 
 prevailed on her to accept. 
 
 " This is very furprifing," exclaimed the 
 X.ady, " that two propofals of this na- 
 ture ihould be made to me in one day." 
 She then affured him that he had been anti- 
 cipated in his generous intention, and that
 
 EDWARD. 339 
 
 {he no longer ftood in need of the affiftance 
 he feemed fo willing to lend. 
 
 Mr. Temple had no notion that Edward 
 tvas the perfon who had been with the Lady 
 when he met him in the paffage ; but he 
 fhewed great fatisfaclion as foon as he dif- 
 covered from her defcription that it was fo. 
 
 " I prefume, Sir," faid the Lady, " that 
 charming youth is a near relation of yours; 
 fure I am, your fouls are akin.'* 
 
 Mr. Teonple bowed without farther ex- 
 planationj and then hinted a defire that fhe 
 would place the fame confidence in him that 
 Jhe had in Edward, and oblige him by ac- 
 cepting his offer alfo. To this the Lady 
 replied, " that (he was not quite fatisfied with 
 herfelf for having yielded to the intreaties 
 of his friend. " It is poflible," continued fhe, 
 " that I may not have need of the money 
 he has lent me ; but there was fo much 
 goodnefs in his motive for making me the 
 offer, fo much candour and benevolence in 
 his countenance, and fuch delicate earneft- 
 nefs in his manner, that I found them irre- 
 fiftible ; and when I accepted, it was really 
 zs in
 
 340 E D \V A R D. 
 
 in fome degree to oblige him. The fams 
 motives would have made the fame impref- 
 (ion, continued (he, had your humane pro- 
 pofal preceded his ; but you fee, my good 
 Sir, there is no longer the fame neceffity." 
 
 Mr. Temple feeming uneafy at her per- 
 fifting in her refufal, the Lady added, " I 
 am exceedingly fenfible, Sir, of your good- 
 nefs ; and although your young friend was 
 in too much hurry to hear my ftory, per- 
 haps you will have patience to learn fome- 
 thing of the perfon you are fo ready to 
 oblige." 
 
 She then informed Mr. Temple, that 
 ihe was the widow of an officer of the ar- 
 tillery, who had died in the Weft Indies ; 
 that me had one fon, a youth of about thir- 
 teen, who was at fchool in London ; that 
 ihe nad hardly any thing to maintain her- 
 felf and this boy, except the penfion of a 
 fubaltern officer's widow ; that me had been 
 living with a relation in the country for a 
 conliderable time, on purpofe to enable her 
 to pay her fon's expences at fchool, and was 
 now, on her way to town to fee her fon, and 
 
 make
 
 EDWARD. 341 
 
 make interefl to get him received as a cadet 
 on the eftablifhinent at Woolwich. 
 
 Mr. Temple faid, he was happy fhe had 
 informed him of her errand to London, 
 becaufe he had hopes that it would be in 
 his power to promote her views, as he had 
 the honour of being known to the Mafter- 
 General of the Ordnance, and would cer- 
 tainly fpeak to him in favour of her fon ; 
 adding, that from the known attention he 
 paid to the duties of his office, and the pa- 
 tronage he willingly beftowed on the fons 
 of officers, there was little room to doubt of 
 fuccefs, 
 
 The Lady poured forth a profufion of 
 grateful acknowledgments to Mr. Temple, 
 while he wrote in his pocket-book the name 
 and iltuation of the fchool where her fon 
 was, with her own addrefs, that he might 
 know where to find them in London. 
 
 The waiter entered to inform her that the 
 flage-coach was arrived ; that he had fe- 
 cured her a place, as one of the paflengers 
 was to go no farther in the coach ; and that 
 it would not proceed for near an hour, by 
 Z 3 vrhich
 
 342 E D W A R D. 
 
 which time he hoped that the rain, which 
 was very violent, would abate. 
 
 On leaving the Lady, Mr. Temple found 
 Edward in the pafTage. The coachman 
 having affifted a young woman with an 
 infant in her arms, from, the coach-box, 
 was leading her, drenched with rain, and 
 the water pouring from her clothes, into 
 the kitchen. Edward and Mr. Temple 
 followed them. Sir George Royfton, who 
 has been, already mentioned, and Colonel 
 Snug, of whom the reader will know more 
 hereafter, flood before the fire ; they waited 
 for frefh horfes to their chaife. 
 
 " If that creature comes hither," cried 
 the Colonel ; " by G d we {hall be all 
 afloat !" 
 
 Edward drew a large chair near the fire, 
 and expreffing fympathy at the ftate ihe 
 was in, defired the woman to fit down. 
 
 " I do not mind myfelf," faid the poor 
 woman ; " but I fear for my child." 
 
 Her apprehenfions were without founda- 
 tion ; for when the rain began fhe had 
 pulled off her cloak, and ftript herfeff of 
 
 fome
 
 EDWARD. 343 
 
 ibme other parts of her drefs, to fcreen the 
 infant ; and although fhe herfelf had been 
 foon wet to the {kin, when the cloak and 
 other wrappings were removed, the child's 
 uiual clothes were found quite dry. 
 
 While the mother, ftill apprehenfive that 
 her child might have fuffered, examined 
 him with affectionate folicitude, the infant 
 ieemed alarmed at the number of ftrange 
 faces that were gazing on him, which Ed ward 
 remarking, gently prefled the woman's 
 head nearer the child, an$l at the fame in- 
 ftant tickling the cheek of the latter, re- 
 peated from Virgil's eclogue 
 
 Incipe y parve pner t rifu cognofcert inatrem. 
 
 The infant, as if it had uriderftood the 
 words, diflipated the mother's fears, and re- 
 paid her care by immediately fmiling in 
 her face. 
 
 Edward then whifpered the Landlady to 
 take the poor woman into a bed-chamber, 
 and give her a dry gown and cloak, for 
 which he would indemnify her. 
 
 The Landlady did as fhe was defired. 
 
 z 4 " Pool
 
 344 EDWARD. 
 
 " Poor young woman," faid the coachman, 
 as fhe left the room, " I am forry there was 
 not room for her within the coach ; fhe has 
 been expofed to the rain above two hours ; 
 and I am fure fhe is drenched to the {kin, 
 and is much to be pitied." 
 
 " She looks like a new-ducked w re," 
 faid Sir George Royfton, with a laugh. 
 
 " She is not handfome enough to be of 
 that profefTion," laid' Colonel Snug. 
 
 " A woman under misfortunes has a right 
 to be pitied, pleafe your honours," faid the 
 coachman, "whetherfhe is handfome or not." 
 
 " She may have a right to what fhe 
 pleafes ; but nobody ever troubles their heads 
 with thofe who are not handfome," rejoined 
 Sir George, 
 
 " Handfome is who handfome does^ pleafe 
 your honours," faid the coachman ; " this 
 poor woman pulled the clothes from her 
 o'.vn back, and expofed herfelf to the florin 
 to protect her child-^-that is what I calls 
 handfome." 
 
 fct Ay, my good fellow," laid Mr. Temple, 
 clapping tfye coachman's fhoulder ; " and 
 
 what
 
 EDWARD. 345 
 
 what every humane and feeling man will 
 call handfome." 
 
 " Parfons, to be fure, are in general men 
 of feeling," faid Colonel Snug, fneeringly. 
 
 " Brave men are generally humane," xe 
 plied Mr. Temple, fixing the Colonel ; 
 " and when a foldler is otherwife, he difho- 
 nours his profeffion." 
 
 " The rain was fo violent, and continued 
 fo long," refumed the coachman, " that I 
 fear the poor woman will fuffer in her 
 health." 
 
 ** Thofe creatures never fuffer in their 
 health," faid Snug ; " I have feen foldiers 
 wives, with children on their backs, keep 
 pace with the men on a march in the midft 
 of froft and fnow, and I never heard of 
 their being the worfe for it." 
 
 " It is nothing to thofe who are ufed to 
 it," added Sir George Royfton. 
 
 Mr. Temple, fupprefling his indignation 
 at this difcourfe, and addrefling the coach- 
 man, faid, " Friend, you feem to take fome 
 intereft in this poor woman ; pray what do 
 
 you know of her ?" 
 
 All
 
 346 EDWARD. 
 
 " All that I know, pleafe your honour, 
 about this here young woman juft gone out 
 is, that her hufband is a lea- faring man ; 
 xvho was taken by a prefs-gang in theftreets 
 of London about a month ago, and fent to 
 Portfmouth. When fhe heard of this, flie 
 followed him without more delay, notwith- 
 ftanding her grief for ftich an accident; 
 whereof fhe took her child with her, and 
 remained there until the fliip on which her 
 hufband was aboard failed, and moft of her 
 money was expended on neceilaries to fit him 
 out, which flie fent to him after {he came 
 afhore, by the boatfwain, although her huf- 
 band, like an honed- hearted failor, had de- 
 fired her not to do it, for fear of diftreffing 
 her ; and fo, being fhort of money, fhe took 
 a feat on the outfide of my coach, and to be 
 fure fhe diji nothing but cry and figh, 
 although I faid all I could to comfort her, 
 by telling her of a relation of my own 
 whofe hufband went to fea, and left hei' 
 with five children, inftcad of one ; and he 
 was abfent for nine years without her ever 
 feeing him, and yet he returned at laft in 
 
 perfect
 
 E D \V A R D. 347 
 
 perfect health, and with a good deal of 
 money, about a month after his wife's death. 
 I told the poor woman all this to keep up 
 her fpirits, faying, that I hoped the fame 
 would not happen to her, as to the article of 
 dying, but only as to her hufband's return- 
 ing in perfect health, and with a good deal 
 of money ; but all I could fay was not able 
 to comfort her." 
 
 " I hope you was able to comfort her, 
 however," faid Colonel Snu.g, " when me 
 was ftripped ; for I think you told us me 
 ftripped herfelf at laft?" 
 
 " When the rain began," anfwered the 
 coachman, " me ftripped herfelf of part of 
 her clothes to fhelter her child ; and without; 
 difparagement, I hope that you, nor none 
 of your relations, ever ftript for a more 
 fmful purpofe." 
 
 " Do you know, friend, to whom Ihe 
 goes when me arrives in London," faid Mr. 
 Temple. 
 
 " She told me," replied the coachman, 
 " that {he was going to her hufband's mo- 
 ther, who is a poor woman who lives in 
 
 Holborn.
 
 348 E D \V A R D. 
 
 Holborn. Her own father is butler to Mr. 
 Bloffom, a rich nabob from the Eaft In- 
 dies ; but he was fo enraged at her quitting 
 her fervice to marry the failor, that he has 
 not feen her fince, although the failor is of 
 an honeft character and a handfome man ; 
 but handfomenefs in ahufband, pleafe your 
 honour, is nothing to a father, although it 
 is a great deal to a daughter.'* 
 
 a I am very well acquainted with Mr. 
 Bloffom," faid Mr. Temple ; and I will 
 fpeak to him on the fubject, and I hope he 
 will prevail on his butler to receive his 
 daughter with kindnefs, and provide for 
 her and her child till her hufband fliall 
 return." 
 
 ct God Almighty blefs you, my good Sir, 
 for your intention," cried the poor woman, 
 who returned to the kitchen with the Land- 
 lady, and had overheard Mr. Temple; "but 
 my father, who is a very honeft man, is fo 
 paffionate, that it will be difficult to bring 
 him to confent to take me home ; and if he 
 did, he would be apt to fpeak of my deav 
 
 Richard
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 Richard in a way that would break my 
 heart." 
 
 Mr, Temple defired her to make herfelf 
 eaiy, as he fhould take care to mention the 
 affair in fach a manner as would reconcile 
 her father." 
 
 Sir George furveyed her with aftonuli- 
 ment ; he could hardly believe (he was 
 the fame whom he had feen fhivering 
 with cold and drenched with rain a little 
 before. Anxiety for her child had likewife 
 contributed to drive the rofe from her cheek, 
 impair the luftre of her eye, and to give her 
 the fickly look of dejection. The altera- 
 tion of drefs, the refreshment {he had taken, 
 and above all the cheering fmiles of her in- 
 fant, had now reftored the native beauty of 
 her countenance, which was alfo augment- 
 ed by the glow of gratitude. 
 
 " Upon my foul, my dear, I am glad to fee 
 you fo much recovered," faid Sir George ; 
 " I was afraid you had fuffered from the rain. 
 As for the gentleman in whofe fervice your 
 father is, he is my intimate friend. O, I am 
 convinced that he and I together will fooa 
 
 prevail
 
 D W A k D. 
 
 prevail on him to be reconciled t6 you; and, 
 hark you, (added he, drawing her a little 
 afide, and fpeaking in a low voice,^ you will 
 call on me after to-morrow j there is my ad- 
 drefa; I mall by that time have ieen your 
 father, and will probably have good news 
 to impart ; in the mean time here is 
 fomething to purchafe clothes for your 
 child." So faying, he flipped a guinea 
 into her hand with his card. 
 
 By this time Colonel Snug was feated in 
 Royfton's carnage, which had arrived the 
 moment before. When Sir George was 
 ftepping in after him, he was followed to 
 the door of the chaife by the young wo- 
 man, who with an air of mpdefty and gra- 
 titude returned him thanks. Colonel Snug 
 was fomewhat ftruck alfo with the favour- 
 able alteration in the appearance of the 
 young woman; and obferving that there 
 were a good many fpe&ators, he was 
 prompted by oftentation, with a flight 
 mixture of good- will, to exhibit his ge- 
 nerofity. 
 
 8 " La
 
 EDWARD. 35 < 
 
 " La Plume," he called with an air of 
 dignity, as he drew on his glove ; " La 
 Plume, give this young woman a couple of 
 guineas on my account.'* 
 
 When the poor woman had exprefled 
 her thankfulnefs for this frefh inftance of 
 liberality, La Plume came to the fide of the 
 chaife, and informed the Colonel that his 
 money was already expended all to within; 
 a few {hillings, and defired five guineas 
 more from his matter that he might give- 
 two to the woman, and keep the reft for 
 future difburfements. 
 
 " Blockhead," cried the Colonel, " why 
 did you not tell me fo before I drew on my 
 gloves; it is impofTible for me now to 
 fumble for my purfe ; poftillion, drive 
 on." The poftillion obeyed, and the car- 
 riage difappeared. 
 
 The ruftic group who were witnefTes to 
 this fcene were {hocked ; curfes againft the 
 Colonel burft from every mouth, and when 
 they came to comment upon his conduct,. 
 the general conftruclion was, that he had 
 ordered the two guirieas to be given from 
 
 flieer
 
 35* EDWARD. 
 
 fheer vanity, knowing that his valet had 
 no money, and that the order could not be 
 executed. In this, however, they were 
 miftaken. Colonel Snug had really be- 
 lieved that his fervant had forne guineas of 
 his money remaining, and he intended 
 bonafide that two of them fhould have been 
 given to the woman. The Colonel was in 
 the habit of profufion, and although always 
 in debt, he was never in want, and there- 
 fore put little value on fmall fums. He had 
 ordered the money to be given, becaufe he 
 was pleafed with the woman's face, becaufe 
 (he had attracted the people's attention, and 
 becaufe parting with two guineas by a word 
 to his valet, gave him no trouble ; whereas 
 pulling off his glove gave him a little. 
 The fpedlators had no idea that any man 
 could ib cruelly difappoint a perfon in the 
 poor woman's circumftances, merely to fave 
 himfelf fo very fmall a piece of trouble j for 
 the moft felfifh villager has no conception 
 of that degree of felfifhnefs and infenfibi- 
 lity to the feelings of others which exifts 
 among the fons of luxury and floth in 
 5 capitals,
 
 EDWARD. 353 
 
 capitals, where the heart is rendered callous 
 by the daily exhibition of profufion con- 
 trafted with want, mifery with mirth, and 
 where people are fo often the witnefles or 
 accomplices of the ruin of friends or ac- 
 quaintance. 
 
 VOL. I. A A
 
 354 E D W A R D. 
 
 CHAP. XXXV. 
 
 La charite fanflifie les adions les plus communes, e? 
 
 vertus. 
 ROCHEFOUCAULD. 
 
 i'orgueil corrompt les plus fublimes vertus. 
 
 part of the foregoing converfa- 
 tion, Edward had fettled every article 
 regarding the young woman, and the ftage- 
 coach being ready, the landlady informed 
 her that the clothes fhe had borrowed were 
 now her own, the young gentleman having 
 paid for them, and for an infide paflage for 
 her in the coach. 
 
 The poor woman, unable to exprefs her 
 gratitude, burft into tears. 
 
 Mr. Temple, having handed the officer's 
 widow into the carriage, next lent his affift- 
 ance to this woman. " Dry up your tears," 
 good woman," faid he, u and ftep in ; but 
 led me advife you not to go near the gentle- 
 man who whifpered you, until I have pre- 
 vailed on your father to fee you, which 
 
 I (hall
 
 EDWARD. 355 
 
 I fhall endeavour to do as foon as I get to 
 London." 
 
 She affured him, that fhe would obferve 
 his advice ; and the coach drove away. 
 
 When he turned about he found Mr. 
 Shuffle and Carnaby (landing behind him ; 
 they had come in fearch of Edward, who 
 prefented Mr. Temple to Shuffle as a friend 
 of his, whom he had prevailed on to dine 
 with them. 
 
 In a mort converfation which Mr. Tem- 
 ple had apart with Edward, immediately 
 before they fat down to dinner, the former 
 afked whether Edward intended to proceed 
 to London that evening, or remain with 
 thofe gentlemen at the inn ? 
 
 Edward anfwered, " That Mr. Shadow 
 and he himfelf were determined to go to 
 town very ibon after dinner." 
 
 " As for Mr. Shadow's determinations," 
 faid Mr. Temple, *i you ought to be fuffi- 
 ciently acquainted with him to know, that 
 their execution depends more on the will of 
 the company in which he is than his own ; 
 A A 2 and
 
 356 EDWARD. 
 
 and from what I have heard of two of his 
 prefent companions, I think it is moft likely 
 that the one, by pufhing the bottle, and the 
 other, by propofing gaming, will detain him 
 here for this night." 
 
 " He fhall remain without me, then,*' 
 faid Edward ; " for I am refolved to go to 
 tdwn." 
 
 It was then agreed, that in cafe Carnaby 
 chofe to remain, Edward fhould fet out 
 with Mr. Temple, who mentioned, at the 
 fame time, his having been already detained 
 much longer than he originally intended ; 
 and that he now waited for a perfon with 
 vrhom he had fome bufmefs, and who 
 would probably call for him before they had 
 done dinner ; foon after which he would 
 order the chaife." 
 
 During the dinner Myrtle called for a 
 variety of wine, and was continually in- 
 viting one or other of the company to 
 drink. 
 
 Mr. Temple drank two glafles with him, 
 but refufed when he propofed a third. 
 
 " I never
 
 EDWARD. 357 
 
 " I never knew a man of your pro- 
 feffion," faid Shuffle, addreffing Mr. Tem- 
 ple, " who did not love his bottle." 
 
 " I have known feveral of yours," 
 replied the latter, " who liked to keep 
 themfelves quite cool, and therefore de- 
 clined it." 
 
 As Shuffle lived by gaming, and knew 
 thathe was looked on as a^ro/^fo/gamefter, 
 this reply pinched him a little ; however, 
 after a fhort paufe, he faid: " My profeffion ! 
 I have no profeffion but that of a gentle- 
 man, Sir." 
 
 " And did you never know a gentleman, 
 Sir," anfvvered Mr. Temple, " who liked to 
 keep himfelf cool, and therefore Declined 
 drinking J" 
 
 " Gentlemen! I fpoke of clergymen," "" 
 jfaid Shuffle. 
 
 " They are included in the other clafs," 
 faid Mr. Temple ; " and in general fupport 
 the character as honourably as the men 
 of any profeflion whatever, without ex- 
 cepting thofe, Sir, who profefs to be gen- 
 tlemen and nothing elfe." 
 
 A A 3 Mr
 
 358 EDWARD. 
 
 Mr. Shuffle was of a difpofition to be in- 
 folent, when he could with fafety, and pe- 
 culiarly inclined to be witty on the clergy. 
 Mr. Temple's manner convinced him, that 
 it would be prudent to reierve certain jokes 
 which he had ready prepared on that fub- 
 ject for fome other opportunity. After a 
 fhort paufe the converfadon became more 
 amicable. 
 
 About an hour after dinner, Mr. Temple 
 called for a bill, faying he was obliged to go 
 to town. 
 
 This demand for the bill was repeated by 
 Mr. Shuffle, who heartily wifhed him gone, 
 as he felt himfelf in conficlerable reftraint 
 in his prefence, and feared that he would 
 be a bar to fome of his projects. He was 
 vexed, however, when s he heard Edward 
 propofe to Carnaby that they mould go alfo. 
 
 This being violently oppofed by Mr. 
 Myrtle, Carnaby declared that he could not 
 think of quitting good company fo foon. 
 
 " Then," faid Edward, " as I am under 
 that neceffity, I will be obliged to Mr. 
 Temple for a place in his chaife." 
 
 In
 
 EDWARD. 359 
 
 In collecting the bill, Shuffle made fuch a 
 demand from each as left eighteen (hillings 
 for the waiter. 
 
 Mr. Temple, after paying his proportion, 
 obferved, that this was a great deal too 
 much. 
 
 " Pray what would you be for giving 
 him >" faid Shuffle. 
 
 " The, third part, at the utmoft," replied 
 Mr. Temple j " and in giving more I (hould 
 think I did wrong." 
 
 " What would you do with the remain- 
 ing twelve ihillings ?" faid Shuffle. " I will 
 be damned fooner than take a fixpence 
 ofi," 
 
 " There is no need of the alternative," 
 faid Mr. Temple, " as I think the twelve 
 {hillings may be better difpofed of than 
 either by giving them to the waiter, or re- 
 fuming them ourfelves." 
 
 They all agreed that he fhould difpofe of 
 them as he pleafed. Mr. Temple then rung 
 the bell, and defired that the young man 
 who waited below to fpeak to him might 
 
 be fent up. 
 
 A A 4 " Gentlemen,"
 
 360 EDWARD. 
 
 " Gentlemen," faid he, addrefiing the 
 company, " I arrived here this morning a 
 confiderable time before any of you ; and, as 
 I pafled into the parlour, I faw the youth I 
 have now fent for pay half-a-crown to the 
 waiter for a bottle of wine ; he was pale, 
 emaciated, and feemed to ftand more in 
 need of victuals than of drink ; he had, be- 
 fides, a look of forrow which interefted me. 
 * Is that wine for your own drinking, my 
 lad r faid I. < God forbid !' anfwered he, 
 with a look of horror. 
 
 " On my inquiring farther, he told me, 
 that his aunt was ill of a putrid fore throat ; 
 that the apothecary had fent fome powders 
 of Jefuits bark, with directions that they 
 fhould be taken in port wine. I afked, if 
 he himfelf was at the expence of this ? Be- 
 fore he could arifwer, the Oftler, who flood 
 by, faid, ' Ay, that he is, and of the apothe- 
 cary's drugs alfo.* 
 
 Well,' refumed the youth, ' and fo I 
 ought ; did not fhe maintain me when I 
 was a helplefs child, after my father and 
 
 mother's
 
 EDWARD. 361 
 
 mother's death, and prevent my coming on 
 the parim. ?' 
 
 f ' It is not every one, however, that 
 would do the fame,' replied the Oilier ; 
 
 * but thou art a worthy foul, Joe, and 
 God's bleffing will follow thee. This poor 
 young fellow,' continued the Oftler, ad- 
 dreffing me, * has taken as much care of his 
 aunt as if (he had been his mother. 7 
 
 " ' Well, and fo I ought,' faid the youth ; 
 
 * (he took as much care of me as if I had 
 been her fon.' 
 
 " I then afked him,'* continued Mr. 
 Temple, " by what means he was enabled 
 to maintain his aunt. He anfwered that 
 he was a houfe-carpenter, and gained 
 fornetimes two (hillings, and fometimes half- 
 a-crown a-day. The Oftler again broke 
 in, faying, That the young lad had almoft 
 killed himfelf, by working extra hours, as 
 he called ir, to procure neceflaries, and 
 dodor's ftuff to his aunt ; adding, that, to 
 his knowledge, the very coat that ought to 
 be on his back was at that moment in pawn 
 for that purpofe* 
 
 " What
 
 362 . EDWARD. 
 
 " 4 What care I for a coat ?' faid the youth ; 
 * if my aunt recovers, I will foon get ano- 
 ther coat ; but if fhe die, where fhall I find 
 4 fo kind a relation ?' 
 
 " Here the tears flowed from his eyes ; 
 and I confefs, gentlemen," continued Mr. 
 Temple, " I was much touched with the 
 dutiful and generous behaviour of this 
 young man ; and but here he is." 
 
 It was evident from the youth's wan face, 
 and emaciated perfon, that very little of his 
 v/ages had been fpent on his own diet. 
 
 " Well, Joe,'' faid Mr. Temple ; " how 
 did you leave your aunt ?" 
 
 " Much better," replied he, " thanks be 
 to God and your honour ; fhe has taken 
 two of the powders and three glafles of 
 wine, and is fo much revived that the 
 apothecary now thinks fhe will recover 
 entirely." 
 
 " I am glad to hear it," faid Mr. Temple ; 
 . " and have to inform you, that thofe gentle- 
 men defire you will accept of twelve fhil- 
 lings to affift yourfelf and her until , her 
 health is quite re-eftablifhed." 
 
 "lam
 
 EDWARD. 363 
 
 " I am much obliged to the gentlemen," 
 faid Joe ; " but the fix bottles of wine you 
 fent from the inn, and the guinea you 
 gave me " 
 
 " Well, well," interrupted Mr. Temple, 
 " fay no more of that ; but here take the 
 gentlemen's money, and when you are able 
 to come to town, call where I directed." 
 
 Joe retired, and Mr. Temple faid, <c I 
 hope, gentlemen, you are all fatisfied that 
 the money is better beftowed than as was at 
 firft propofed." 
 
 All gave a ready aflent, except Mr. 
 Shuffle ; who faid : " After all, I do not 
 fee that there was any nece/Tity of retrench- 
 ing from the waiter on purpofe to give to 
 this man ; but to (hew that I approve of 
 his conduct to his aunt, and can . be as 
 charitable as any man, although I love to 
 pay waiters genteelly, Here, Landlord, here 
 are two guineas, which I defire may be 
 added to the guinea which I find Mr. Tem- 
 ple has already beftowed on him." 
 
 " Since that is the cafe," cried Myrtle, 
 
 who had drank a great deal more than any 
 
 12 of
 
 364 E D W A R D. 
 
 of the company, " d n me if Mr. Tern- 
 pie, although he is a parfon, fliall be more 
 charitable than me ; and fo I defire, Mr, 
 Landlord, that you will forthwith fend Joe a 
 dozen of this very port, and put it to my 
 account, that Joe and his aunt may get 
 jovial together, when Mr. Temple's fix botr 
 ties are exhaufted." 
 
 " I always loved to be in the fafhion," 
 laid Mr. Garnaby Shadow ; " and fmce 
 charity feems to be the prefent ton, I do 
 not choofe to be left like a quiz out of the 
 mode j that the poor woman and her ne- 
 phew, therefore, may be able fully to relifh 
 all this port wine, I beg the landlord may 
 alfo fend her a roafted chicken, or whatever 
 dim. (he likes better, every day, until fhe 
 u quite well, with a good large difh of 
 beef fteaks for Joe, to put a little more flefh 
 on the poor devil's bones ; and I promife to 
 pay his bill at fight, which is more than I 
 ever did to my taylors." 
 
 " I heartily hope, gentlemen," faid Mr. 
 Temple, " that the faihion you have begun 
 will become general and have a long run ; 
 
 and
 
 EDWARD. 365 
 
 and I am happy to find that our meeting 
 to-day has proved fo beneficial to two peo- 
 ple who feem fo well to deferve your 
 bounty. It is fortunate for Mr. Shuffle 
 that he can afford to be at once charitable 
 and lavifh. I am not in that fituadon ; my 
 finances oblige me to pay waiters and pot- 
 tillions no more than their due, that I may 
 be enabled to pay trades-people the whole 
 of theirs, and ftill have fomething to beftow 
 upon the neceffitous." Having faid this, he 
 and Edward took leave of the company. 
 
 As they went down flairs Mr. Shadow's 
 fervant offered to affift Edward on with 
 his great coat. " I fhall not put it oa 
 at prefent," faid he, taking the coat from 
 the fervant, and ftepping into a room, 
 beckoned Joe to follow him. " Here," 
 faid he, " Joe," after he had fhut the door, 
 " here is a coat which encumbers me, I 
 have a notion it will fuit you ; try it on." 
 
 " Lord,Sir," faid Joe, " I fhould be afhamed 
 to put on your honour's coat ; befides the 
 night is very cold, and your honour " 
 
 " Never mind my honour," faid Edward, 
 interrupting him, " but on with the coat. 
 
 Come,
 
 366 EDWARD. 
 
 Come, hold out your arm, Yes, I thought 
 it would fit you." 
 
 " It fits me to be fare," faid Joe ; " but 
 it is too fine." 
 
 " Well, Joe, wear it for my fake, and I 
 hope you will never be under the neceffity 
 of pawning it, either on your own account 
 or your aunt's." So faying, he flew out of 
 the room, and darting into the carriage, 
 where Mr. Temple was already feated, they 
 drove off. 
 
 They had no fooner left the room, than 
 Mr. Shuffle faid ; " Now I fhould be glad 
 to know what is the parfon's real view in 
 all this flourilh about this fellow Joe." 
 
 Myrtle. What view could he have but to 
 ferve the man ? 
 
 Shuffle. I cannot tell what view he had, but 
 I'll be fhot if that was the whole of it. 
 
 Carnaby. Why do you doubt it ? 
 
 Shuffle. Becaufe all parfons are hypo- 
 crites ; and I never knew any of them that 
 had not fome motive of intereft in what- 
 ever they did. 
 
 Landlord. I afk pardon for putting in 
 my word, gentlemen ; but I muft fay that 
 
 I have
 
 EDWARD. 367 
 
 I have known Mr. Temple do feveral things 
 quite of a piece with his behaviour to the 
 poor lad. 
 
 Shuffle. I'll be hanged, then, if he has 
 not done them on purpofe that you might 
 trumpet his fame through the country for 
 charity and benevolence. 
 
 Landlord. He muft have engaged many 
 trumpeters befides me, pleafe your honour ; 
 for I hardly ever hear his name mentioned 
 but fome perfon in the company has fome- 
 thing of that nature to record of him. 
 Sbitffle. Pihaw ! it is all orientation. 
 As Mr. Shuffle pronounced this, he 
 turned contemptuoufly his back on the 
 Landlord, who left the room ; and then 
 addrefiing Carnaby, he faid : 
 
 Shiiffle. Do you imagine that all the fufs 
 which your friend Edward made about the 
 woman proceeded from pure love alfo ? 
 
 Carnaby. Why faith, I (hould think fo; 
 for the woman feemed to be in great diftrefs 
 about her child. 
 
 Shuffle. Diftrefs ! to be fure (he was in 
 diftrefs ; but what was her diftrefs to him? 
 
 Carnaby.
 
 368 E D \V A R D. 
 
 Carnaby. Very little, one might natu- 
 rally think ; but Edward is {angular in that 
 way ; you can have no conception how 
 much I have feen him moved at the diftrefs 
 of people with whom he had no connection, 
 and in whom he ought naturally to have 
 had no concern. I perceived that he was 
 exceedingly moved with the coachman's 
 ftory about the woman and child. 
 
 Shuffle. If he is to be taken in with 
 affecting ftories, he may have one told him 
 at the corner of every ftreet in London. 
 Beggars never were fo numerous ; one 
 would be tempted to think that half the 
 town was ftarving of hunger ; but for my 
 part I make it a rule never to give any 
 thing to a ftreet beggar. 
 
 Carnaby. That is a very good rule when 
 you are in a carriage and can drive paft 
 them ; but how do you do when you are 
 a foot, particularly if you are caught 
 knocking at a door ? 
 
 Shuffle. Why then indeed I am undex 
 the fame neceffity of furrendering my mo- 
 ney as if a piftol were held to my breaft. 
 jo Every
 
 EDWARD. 369 
 
 Every idea of chanty is equally out of the 
 queftion in both cafes ; though in the one 
 the money is demanded for God's fake, 
 and in the other for my own fake. 
 
 Carnaby. I do remember being once 
 fmgled out by a terrible woman with an 
 enormous belly, who ftuck to me bawling 
 for charity the whole length of Piccadilly, 
 Being determined not to give her a farthing, 
 I was quickening my pace to (hake her off, 
 when unluckily I met a Lady of my ac- 
 quaintance, and flopped to fpeak to her. 
 The hideous wretch with the belly, taking 
 advantage of the incident, renewed her 
 clamour fo loud and fo woefully, that I 
 was afraid the monfler would have been 
 delivered in the open ftreet, and fo I wa* 
 obliged to throw her a fhilling, which put 
 an end to her labour and my pangs at once. 
 
 Shuffle. And many of the fimpletons who 
 faw you thought, I'll be fworn, that you 
 gave her the (hilling from a motive of cha- 
 rity, juft as the blockhead of a Landlord 
 imagines that the parfon's behaviour to Joe 
 proceeded from pure benevolence. No, 
 
 VOL. i. ' B B no,
 
 370 E D \V A R D. 
 
 no, it is all a farce ; men of fenfe knovr 
 better, and you may depend upon it that 
 your friend Edward has taken a fancy for 
 the woman, and has appointed her to meet 
 him in town. You may remember that 
 after her drefs was put a little in order me 
 looked pretty and piquant enough. 
 
 Myrtle. She looked pretty to be fure ; 
 but I am convinced fhe is a modeft woman 
 for all that. 
 
 Shuffle. I don't know what you mean by 
 a modeft woman. 
 
 Myrtle. A woman of chaftity. 
 
 At this Shuffle burft into a horfe-laugh, 
 in which he was joined by Carnaby, who 
 exclaimed in the intervals, " Chaftity ! 
 that is a good one !" 
 
 Myrtle. Not with (landing all your mirth, 
 I think I underftand women as well as either 
 
 b 
 
 of you, and from the appearance and man- 
 ner of the failor's wife, I am willing to 
 bet a hogihead of claret on her being 
 modeft. 
 
 Shuffle. It would be taking an advantage 
 of you ; you have already drank a little 
 
 too
 
 EDWARD. 371 
 
 too much. Chaftity ! why it never was 
 much the mode among women of her rank ; 
 and you muft know, my dear fellow, how 
 very irkfome the fafhion has been to fome 
 of the fupeHor orders, and how difficult they 
 find it to fupport that kind of reputation 
 which is ftill confidered as indifpenfable on, 
 certain occafions. This piece of old eti- 
 quette they think may have fuited the buck- 
 ram reign of Queen Befs, but is a griev- 
 ance that requires to be redrefled at prefent. 
 The failor's wife, however, is not afFecled 
 by this reftraint, as the parfon knows, who 
 I fufpeft underftands women better than 
 you. 
 
 Carnaby joined Mr. Shuffle in his jokes 
 againft the parfon and the failor's wife ; but 
 as the reader might not think them fo en- 
 tertaining as the two gentlemen themfelves 
 did, they are omitted. 
 
 BB 2
 
 372 E D W A R D. 
 
 CHAP. XXXVI. 
 
 What his hard heart denies 
 His charitable vanity fupplies. POPE. 
 
 ,OON after Mr. Temple and Edward were 
 
 feated in the poft chaife, the following 
 dialogue took place. 
 
 Edward. Of all the hardeners of the 
 heart,! believe avarice is the greateft. 
 
 Temple. I believe fo too ; for when that 
 cold paffion gets hold of the heart, it con- 
 tracts it even beyond the expanding influence 
 of vanity ; and you may therefore obferve, 
 that thorough-paced mifers are devoid of 
 vanity. 
 
 Edward. It is clear that the gentlemen 
 we have left are not thorough-paced mifers. 
 
 Temple. I am afraid, however, that the 
 bounty which flows from unworthy mo- 
 tives is generally ill applied. 
 
 Edward.
 
 EDWARD. 373 
 
 Edward. The effect is good, whatever 
 the motive may be. The bounty flows at 
 leaft from the rich to the poor. 
 
 Temple. I believe that ill applied liberality 
 does more harm than good. If the extra- 
 vagant manner in which fome people re- 
 ward waiters and poftillions had no other 
 effect than making money pafs from one 
 fet*of worthlefs perfons to another, there 
 would be no caufe of regret ; but the ill 
 confequences of this abfurd prodigality is 
 more extenfive, and often proves a real in- 
 conveniency to the community in general. 
 You yourfelf was a witnefs to the infolent 
 behaviour of the poftillion to the Lady in 
 the court of the inn ; this was entirely 
 owing to the ill directed profufion of fuch 
 people as thofe we have quitted ; if that 
 fellow had not been accuflomed to receive 
 more than his due from the prodigal and 
 oftentatious, he would not have treated 
 that diftrefled Lady with fuch brutal info- 
 lence. Thofe who pay poftillions and 
 ' waiters with fuch childifli profufion are the 
 original caufe of their infolence to people, 
 B B 3 who,
 
 374 EDWARD. 
 
 who, whether from choice or neceffity, pay 
 them no more than their due. 
 
 Edward. The prodigality you condemn 
 in thofe gentlemen proceeds merely from 
 inattention, or contempt of money. 
 
 'Temple. If the profufion were univerfal, 
 or extended to a great number of other 
 objects, I ihould be of your opinion. If, 
 for example, they were equally lavifh to the 
 unfortunate houfe-keeper, whole diftrefles 
 occafionally come to their knowledge, or if 
 they overpaid the induftrious tradefman 
 with the fame liberality with which t'hey 
 overpay waiters at inns, taverns, and gam- 
 ing-houfes, I (hould impute their prodiga- 
 lity to difregard of money ; but when I 
 fee the fame men who are fo laviih to the 
 latter, pafs the naked beggar without emo- 
 tion, lend a deaf ear to the tale of domeftic 
 diftrefs, and evade the payments of their 
 juft debts, I cannot impute their condudt 
 to inattention or contempt of money. 
 
 Edward. To what then do you impute 
 thofe gentlemen's liberality to poftillions 
 and waiters ? Do you imagine they have 
 
 any
 
 EDWARD. 375 
 
 any particular kindnefs for that clafs of 
 men ? 
 
 Temple. I think they have a kindnefs to 
 none of the human race ; every bit as little 
 to thofe to whom they are fo prodigal as to 
 others. After'they have enjoyed the parade 
 of throwing them the money, they do not 
 care if thofe who received it fell and broke 
 their necks, or were hanged the next day. 
 
 Edward. But ftill there muft be fome 
 caufe for this peculiar liberality to waiters 
 and poftillions ; for the gentlemen in quef- 
 tion, thoughtlefs as you think them, muft 
 acl: from fome motive or other. 
 
 Temple. It is not eafy to account for any 
 part of the behaviour of thofe whofe ge- 
 neral conduct is marked with inconfiftency. 
 In this particular inftance I think, however, 
 it may be done. You may have obferved 
 that thofe who have the leaft bufinefs are 
 often in the greateft hurry ; we fee people 
 pofting with the rapidity of couriers, as if 
 the fate of the empire depended on their 
 fpeed, who, when they came to the end of 
 their journey, have nothing to do, and there- 
 B B 4 fore
 
 D W A R D. 
 
 fore return with the fame expedition to the 
 place from whence they ftarted : but. they 
 cannot have all this impatience gratified 
 without being lavifh to the drivers ; for 
 thofe fellows will not kill their matter's 
 horfes for nothing.' Befides, many of the fine 
 gentlemen in queftion are fond of the cring- 
 ing attention and prompt fervility of waiters 
 and footmen, from fome of whom com- 
 mon civility is no more to be had, without 
 bribery, than the fuffrages of venal voters at 
 an election. Be allured, my young friend, 
 that thofe who lavifh their cafh in this 
 manner, or who rifk great fums at play, 
 although, they do not apply their money to 
 proper ufes, have no contempt for it. 
 
 Edward. It feems aftoniming,that any man 
 in his fenfes, and independent circumftances, 
 can ri(k that blefled ftate for the chance 
 of attaining any poflible fortune, or the en- 
 joyment of the moil expenfive luxuries. 
 
 Temple. Efpecially as the moft expenfive 
 
 luxuries are not the pleafanteft. The 
 
 true way of calculating the rifks in gaming 
 
 is not by the quantity of money, but by the 
 
 6 quantity
 
 EDWARD. 377 
 
 quantity of happinefs that is to be loft or 
 gained ; and, according to this rule, it will 
 appear, that he who would ftake ten thou- 
 fand pounds, being his whole fortune, 
 againft a million, upon an equal throw, 
 would make an imprudent bet. 
 
 Edward. I am clearly of that opinion. 
 Temple. But if thofe are blameable who 
 throw away their own fortunes or happi- 
 nefs, what do you think of thofe who rifle 
 the fortunes of others ? 
 
 Edward. You mean thofe mercantile 
 adventurers, who, having the reputation of 
 being rich, but confcious that they are 
 worth nothing, riik the money they have 
 borrowed in projects of commerce, which, if 
 fuccefsful, the gain will be their's, and if 
 otherwife, the lofs is for their creditors. 
 Temple. I did not fpeak of them. 
 Edward. I know not, then, to what clafs 
 of men you allude. 
 
 Temple. This Mr. Shuffle, whom we 
 have juft parted with, is of the clafs to 
 whom I allude. He is indebted to every 
 
 friend
 
 378 EDWARD. 
 
 friend or relation whom he could prevail on, 
 under any pretence, to lend him money ; this 
 money he immediately ri(ks at the gaming- 
 table. But, although he has been often fuc- 
 cefsful, and enabled to pay all his creditors, 
 he has always either fpent the money in lux- 
 urious profufion, or laid it up in a fund for 
 future gaming. He pays no legal debt until 
 he is forced by law. All his creditors who, 
 from delicacy or affection, have abftained 
 from ufmg thefe means, remain unpaid. 
 I have heard, that he even prevailed on his 
 mother to fell great part of her jointure, to 
 relieve him on an emergency ; and that fhe 
 was reduced to great difficulties, and neg- 
 lected by him before her death. This plan 
 of taking advantage of the partiality of 
 friends and relations is the bafeft of all kinds 
 of fwindling ; and if thofe who practife it, 
 who amount to a confiderable number 
 in this virtuous capital, were to declare in 
 plain Englifli the fentiments on which their 
 conduct was founded, each of them would 
 addrefs his friend or relation to the folio w- 
 12 ing
 
 EDWARD. 379 
 
 ing effed : " Sir, or Madam, I know you 
 have a greater friendftiip or regard for me 
 than any other perfon of my acquaintance ; 
 I mall therefore cheat you out of as much 
 money as I poflibly can. As for my other cre- 
 ditors, I mall pay them all I owe them, be- 
 caufe they would throw me in prifon if I did 
 not ; but as you love me too much to pro- 
 ceed to fuch extremities, I cannot bear the 
 thoughts of paying you a fmgle fixpence, 
 whatever inconvenience you may fuffer 
 from the want of your money." 
 
 Edward. I am filled with horror ; but 1 
 cannot help thinking that what you "have 
 heard of Shuffle has been exaggerated ; I 
 cannot believe that any man on earth could 
 aftfo. 
 
 Temple. I mould be happy to think, my 
 dear Edward, that you would be of your 
 prefent opinion twenty years hence. 
 
 Edtvard. At all events I will warn Car- 
 naby, and put him on his guard againft 
 Shuffle. 
 
 Temple.
 
 380 E 'D W A R D. 
 
 Temple. He will not prbfit by your 
 warning ; he is too -vain, and too felf-fuf- 
 ficient. 
 
 Edward* I know Mr. Shadow to be 
 rather a weak man, and fomewhat of a 
 fop ; but I do not think him vicious or un- 
 feeling. 
 
 'Temple. There are exceptions, no doubt ; 
 but in general nothing is more unfeeling 
 than a fop, nor any animal more com- 
 pletely felfifh. I have feen one of them 
 grudge a crown to a tradefman, and the 
 next minute pay three guineas with plea- 
 fure for a fwitch. I have known another 
 call every day for a fortnight to obferve the 
 progrefs of a new phaeton he had ordered 
 to be built, while he was with difficulty 
 prevailed on to pay a fingle vifit to a friend 
 confined with illnefs. A ball, a horfe-race, 
 a new dancer, the lateft fafhion, intereft 
 him more than any thing of real import- 
 ance. The mind of a fop, regardlefs of 
 what is valuable, attaches itfelf to thofe 
 trifling objects only which the vortex of 
 
 fafhion
 
 EDWARD. 381 
 
 fafhion whirls within its reach. Nothing 
 of moment can adhere to what is fo eflen- 
 tially flimfy, like rubbed amber, which, 
 without influencing any fubftance of 
 weight, attracts all the ftraws and chaffs 
 that are near it.
 
 382 E D W A R D. 
 
 CHAP. XXXVII. 
 
 Inter caufas malorum noftrorum eft, quod vivimus ad 
 fxemplum, nee ratione componimur, fed confuetudine ab- 
 ducimur. SENEC. EPIST. 
 
 E converfation having been inter- 
 rupted by the change of horfes, a long 
 filence took place, during which Edward was 
 abforbed in thought ; at length Mr. Temple 
 faid, " I perceive we are near the end of our 
 journey, but before we feparate, I feel my- 
 felf difpofed. to give you a little advice, if 
 you are in the humour of receiving it." 
 
 Edward beginning to declare how much 
 he fhould think himfelf obliged, Mr. Tem- 
 ple 1 added, " Advice, you know, my dear 
 fellow, is a kind of commodity which peo- 
 ple in general are more apt to give than 
 willing to receive it cofts nothing. 
 
 Edivard. Forgive me That experience 
 which enables a perfon to give good advice 
 may have coft a great deal. 
 
 Temple.
 
 EDWARD. 383 
 
 Temple. The beftowing it, however, does 
 not make a man the poorer. 
 
 Edward. It may be a very valuable pre- 
 fent, notwithftanding ; for, (afluming fome- 
 what of a theatrical accent,) " He that gives 
 me good advice, gives that which, not im- 
 poveriming him, may make me rich in- 
 deed." 
 
 Temple. It were a thoufand pities not to 
 make you rich, fmce you think you can be 
 fo at fo cheap a rate. 
 
 Edward. I am all attention. 
 
 Temple. To begin then, I advife you to 
 avoid gaming. 
 
 Edward. Gaming ! 
 
 Temple. Yes, and drinking. 
 
 Edward. Why I have not the fmalleft 
 tafte for either. 
 
 Temple. I know it. 
 
 Edward. How then can you think it 
 necefTary to caution me againft them ? 
 
 Temple. Becaufe the caution may be 
 ufeful. 
 
 Edward. Againft gaming and drinking! 
 
 Temple.
 
 384 E D W A R D. 
 
 Temple. Yes, gaming and drinking ; 
 Hsec funt quse noftra liceat te voce moneri. 
 
 Ecfavard. You fay that you know that I 
 have no tafte for them ? 
 
 Temple. And therefore I think it may be 
 of life to caution you againft that complai- 
 fance to the tafte of others, which, by habit, 
 creates a tafte, where it did not before 
 exift ; becaufe \vhen allowed to grow and 
 take root by habit, all caution is fuperfluous. 
 I have lived thus long in the 'world, and 
 have known few inftances of gamefters 
 leaving ofTplay, until both their money and 
 credit were exhaufted ; and hardly one 
 drunkard who ever reformed. 
 
 Edward. I have fuch an averflon to one, 
 and fo little propenfity to the other, that I 
 fhall have no occafion for exercifing the 
 virtue of felf-denial in abftaining from 
 both. 
 
 Temple. Perhaps not yet. I have known 
 young men who, at your time of life, feemed 
 to have an averfion to the one, and no tafte 
 for the other ; and, by keeping company 
 
 with.
 
 EDWARD. 385 
 
 with gamefters and drunkards, became the 
 victims of drinking and gaming. I re- 
 member this poor fellow Myrtle a fprightly 
 young man, not in the lead addicted to 
 drinking, until from mere eafmefs of difpo- 
 fition, and a dread of ridicule, he fwallowed 
 every night a greater quantity of wine than 
 he liked, in compliance with the felicitation 
 of thofe who liked a greater quantity of 
 wine than he could fwallow ; and, to avoid 
 the imputation of a milk-fop, he has be- 
 come a fot. 
 
 " His companion Mr. Shuffle was origi* 
 nally fond of hunting and country amufe* 
 ments, lived a good deal on his eftate in the 
 country, and (hewed no tafte for gaming be- 
 yond a moderate bet on a cricket match ; but 
 being elected a member of a club, where he 
 was often witnefs to very deep play, and 
 tempted with the eafe and expedition with 
 which he faw money acquired by fomeof his 
 acquaintance, he felt a defire of imitating 
 them ; the confequence of which was, his lof- 
 ing a fum which diftrefted him confiderably 
 to pay ; this he determined to recover, and 
 
 YOL. i. c c then
 
 386 EDWARD. 
 
 then to quit gaming for ever. He began 
 the attempt, I have been told, with caution, 
 but being laughed at for refufmg deep bets, 
 where he was allured the chance was in his 
 favour, and feeing thofe who accepted them 
 admired for their fpirit, he caught more 
 courage, increafed in fpirit every night, and 
 at length had fpirit enough to lofe his whole 
 fortune. Of late, I understand, he has been 
 more lucky, and is now fomewhat raifed in 
 point of circumftances, but greatly funk in 
 that of reputation. In fhort, my dear Ed- 
 ward, I am convinced that although there 
 are excefTes into which young men are 
 fometimes led, from too great indulgence 
 to natural propensities, thofe of drinking 
 and gaming are not of the number. To ac- 
 quire a tafle for the one, a ftrong reluctance 
 muft be overcome ; and the other, being a 
 continual exercife of the paffion of avarice, 
 cannot be fuppofed natural to youth ; yet, 
 when acquired, they engrofs every faculty 
 of the mind, rule with the mod tyrannic 
 fway, and often lead to debafement, infamy, 
 and ruin. It is, therefore, before the tafte is 
 
 acquired,
 
 EDWARD. 387 
 
 acquired, and while the reluctance is unfub- 
 dued, that advice and Warning can be of any 
 utility; and one of the mod important pieces 
 of advice that can be given to the genera- 
 lity of young men at their entrance into life is, 
 that they do not facrifice their own taftes to 
 thofe of others. This is the more requifite, 
 becaufe that modefty and diffidence, which 
 belongs to men of the moft amiable charac- 
 ter, inclines them to give up their own judg- 
 ment to perfons of higher felf-fufficiency 
 and inferior understandings. And we 
 daily fee thofe who are fond of the ex- 
 ercife of reafon, and have pleafure in re- 
 flection, facrifice their reafon in complaifance 
 to men who cannot bear their own thoughts, 
 and are never comfortable until they have 
 drowned reflection. We alfofee thofe who 
 are formed for the enjoyment of fociety, and 
 who covet nobody's money, led into gaming 
 by men who have no enjoyment but play. 
 People of weak characters, who are the moft 
 ready, ought to be the moft (hy to imitate 
 others; for as valetudinarians, who have 
 c c 2 not
 
 E D W A -R D. 
 
 not ftrength of conftitution to throw off 
 their old difeafes, are in the greateft danger 
 of finking under a new contagion ; fo thofe 
 who have not ftrength of mind to correct 
 their own foibles, are the moft likely to re- 
 tain every frefh ridicule or fafhionable fop- 
 pery that they once adopt. As for my 
 own part, I have fuch a defpicable opinion 
 of thejervum pecus imitatorum^ that I fhould 
 think it lefs contemptible to be an original 
 than a copy, even in things reprehenfible ; 
 and if I fhould ever become a drunkard, it 
 fliall be becaufe I myfelf find pleafure in the 
 tafte and effect of wine, and not becaufe 
 other people do ; or, if I fhall ever rifk my 
 money at play, it lhall be when I myfelf 
 become covetous, and not becaufe Mr. 
 Shuffle, or any other of my acquaintance, 
 is fo. On the fame principle, when I be- 
 come a faunterer from one public place of 
 entertainment to another, it (hall be after 
 I have loft all tafte for ftudy and conver- 
 fation, and not merely in imitation of Mr* 
 
 Carnaby
 
 EDWARD. 389 
 
 Carnaby Shadow, and fafhionable people of 
 the fame caft. 
 
 " There is yet another fpecies of imi- 
 tation, my dear Edward, which has ruined 
 greater numbers than ail the reft put to- 
 gether ; that is, when the poor imitate the 
 wealthy. A man in confined circum- 
 ftances may be placed in fituations, no 
 doubt, where there is a call for fpending 
 more than he can afford ; in that cafe, he 
 muft yield, with a good grace, to the ne- 
 ceffity ; and, afterwards, he muft have the 
 firmnefs to retrench his expences till the 
 cxcefs is compenfated; but he muft through 
 life refift the felicitations of thoughtlefs 
 profligates, and the unfeeling rich, who 
 fee the diftrefs of their acquaintance with 
 indifference, to whom the expence that 
 ruins him is a trifle, and who will be the 
 firft to abandon and laugh at him, after 
 leading him to the door of a jail. 
 
 " Here, my dear Edward, ends our 
 
 journey and my tedious lecture ; but if you 
 
 will come and dine with me to-morrow, 
 
 g C 3 I pro-
 
 390 E D W A R D. 
 
 I promife you a bit of mutton and a bottle 
 of excellent claret, without a morfel of 
 advice." 
 
 To this propofal Edward willingly af- 
 fented, and, calling a coach, ftepped into it, 
 and drove to his chamber?. 
 

 
 EDWARD. 
 
 39* 
 
 CHAP. XXXVIII. 
 
 Self-love thus pufh'd to focial, to divine, 
 
 Gives thee tc make thy neighbour's bleffing thinr 
 
 HE following morning Edward called on 
 Mr. Temple before breakfaft, telling 
 him that he felt an inclination to" accom- 
 pany him to the father of the poor woman 
 who had married the failor, that they might 
 unite their endeavours to prevail on the 
 man to be reconciled to his daughter. 
 
 " I fancy I am indebted for this early 
 vifit to your fufpecting I had forgot the 
 failor's wife," faid Mr. Temple. " I thank 
 you very cordially, my young friend, for 
 reminding me of this engagement ; we fhall 
 go together after breakfaft, for although I 
 hope it would not have efcaped me, the 
 fooner a duty of this kind is performed the 
 better.' 1 
 
 r c 4 They
 
 392 EDWARD. 
 
 They went accordingly. The matter 
 being abfent, Mr. Temple told the butler 
 that his principal bufmefs was with himfelf, 
 and regarded a virtuous woman to whom 
 any man in England might be proud of 
 being related. He proceeded to mention 
 his daughter in terms of the higheft regard; 
 both he and Edward put her affectionate 
 behaviour to her child, and the whole of 
 her conduct, in fuch a light, that the man 
 xvas entirely foftened, and having expreffed 
 a deiire of feeing her, Mr. Temple took 
 him into his carriage, and drove directly 
 to the houfe of the mother-in-law in Hoi- 
 born, where they found the failor's wife 
 with her child. It foon appeared that the 
 butler's cruelty had not proceeded from an 
 unfeeling heart, but from a fudden guft of 
 pride, which had frozen his natural affec- 
 tion, joined to an obftinate temper, which 
 made him punifh himfelf rather than not 
 punifh a daughter whom he loved. The 
 perfuafion of Mr. Temple overcame his ob- 
 ftinacy ; the fight of his daughter melted 
 his heart ; and the man's affections flowed 
 5 in
 
 EDWARD. 393 
 
 in their natural courfe, and with augmented 
 force. From this time he took more delight 
 than ever in the company of his daughter; 
 he became very fond of his grandfon ; he 
 rendered the old woman's fituation more 
 comfortable ; his own life became much 
 happier; and he fmcerely joined the mo- 
 ther and wife in wifhing for the fafe return 
 of the failor ; in which wifh they were all 
 gratified the following year. 
 
 When they withdrew from the reiterated 
 blefiings of this happy family, Mr. Temple 
 having reminded Edward that he would 
 expert to fee him at dinner, waited on the 
 Matter General of the Ordnance, and had 
 the fatisfaction of fucceeding in his applica- 
 tion for the fon of the officer's widow. 
 Mr. Temple, impatient to communicate 
 this good news to the mother, drove to her 
 lodgings in the city, and informed her that 
 her fon would be received into the Academy 
 as foon as he mould prefent himfelf. 
 
 Mr. Temple, having enjoyed the happinefs 
 which this information conveyed to the 
 Lady, was taking his leave, but fhe prefled 
 
 him
 
 394- EDWARD. 
 
 him to ftay until her fon, whom (lie exped- 
 ed every minute, fhould return. Mr. Tem- 
 ple faid that he would find fome other op- 
 portunity of feeing the young gentleman ; 
 but he muft deny himfelf that fatisfadion at 
 prefent, becaufe he had bufmefs to tranfacl: 
 before dinner. The Lady feemed much 
 difappointed in the thought of his not 
 feeing her fon ; " For I am fare, faid (lie, 
 it would afford you fatisfaclion to find that 
 the perfon for whom you have fo generoufly 
 interefled yourfelf, is one of the braveft, 
 worthieft, fweeteft youths in the world.'* 
 
 Mr. Temple could not comprehend how 
 he fhould find all this in the young man's 
 appearance ; but he plainly perceived that 
 the mother was convinced of it, and that 
 {he would be mortified if he did not fee 
 her fon ; he therefore ftayed until the youth 
 arrived. There certainly was nothing very 
 interesting in his face, perfon, or manner. 
 The Lady prefented him to Mr. Temple 
 with, exultation ; he received the young 
 man with every mark of kindnefs ; afked 
 him a few queftions ; gave him fome in- 
 
 ftrudicns
 
 EDWARD. 395 
 
 ftrutions refpeding his conduct at the Aca- 
 demy, and congratulated the Lady on her 
 having fo fine a young man for 'her fon. 
 He then left her the happieft woman in 
 England, and pretty well convinced that 
 her fon, if he lived, would become one of 
 the beft engineers in the fervice, and might 
 not improbably one day be at the head 
 of the Board of* Ordnance. Thole of the 
 readers who have no children may fufpect 
 that this Lady was a very foolifh woman ; 
 but thofe who are mothers will allow that 
 {he may have dill been a woman of good 
 fenfe. 
 
 When Mr. Temple arrived at his own 
 houfe, he found that Edward had been 
 waiting above an hour. 
 
 " I wifliyou joy," faid Edward, for I 
 fee by the cheerfulnefs of your countenance 
 that you have been fuccefsful." 
 
 " That I have," replied Mr. Temple ; 
 " and I fhall fit down to dinner with very 
 great fatisfaclion." He then recounted the 
 particulars of his vifit to the oiTicer*s wi. 
 dow. 
 
 i " How
 
 39 6 EDWARD, 
 
 " How fortunate was it," faid Edward, 
 " that you chanced to ftop at the inn ; and 
 how grateful ought you to be, my good Sir, 
 to poor Joe the carpenter, and to this Lady, 
 for affording you the mearxs of fo much 
 enjoyment." 
 
 " I confefs it," rejoined Mr* Temple-; 
 ** both you and 1 muft have a partiality for 
 thofe who in any way contribute to our 
 happinefs. The recollection of having been 
 of fervice to that worthy lad and his aunt, as 
 well as to the Lady and her fon, conveys a 
 pleafmg kind of fenfation, which I cannot 
 cxprefs." 
 
 " Shakefpeare could," replied Edward ; 
 " it comes over the heart as foft mufic docs 
 over the ear ; 
 
 ' Like the fvveet fouth, 
 That breathes upon a bank of violets:* 
 
 " It is moft fortunate for men to hava 
 hearts fo framed that they derive pleafure 
 from fuch recollections. Men of that con- 
 ftrudion are ftimulated to do good to others 
 for their own fake." 
 
 "Do
 
 D W A R D. 397 
 
 " Do you not think," replied Edward, 
 44 that fuch a motive degrades benevolence ? 
 I fhould love to find fome nobler motive for 
 doing good." 
 
 " Find as many motives for doing good 
 as you can, my dear Edward ; but 1 hope 
 you will never lofe that one ; becaufe I take 
 it to be the moft adive and the moft 
 certain." 
 
 This led to fome difquifitions, much too 
 abftrad for our purpofe, and which, after 
 the two friends had agitated a long time, 
 they left as they began, without coming to 
 any fatisfadory conclufion ; but as we have 
 no wifh 
 
 On metaphyfic ground to prance, 
 
 To fhew our paces, not one ftep advance, 
 
 we have determined to omit the reft of this 
 dialogue.
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XXXIX. 
 
 The f*e!l of pity not to be confin'd 
 WitSjin the fcanty limits of the mind, 
 Difdains the bank, and throws the golden fands 
 A rich depofit, on the bordering lands. 
 
 CowrER. 
 
 \X7HEN Edward returned to his chambers 
 in the evening, he found a letter, 
 containing a very preffing demand of pay- 
 ment for an account which had been due a 
 confiderable time. On one or two occa- 
 fions, before he left the Univerfity, he had 
 exhaufted the whole of what he was allowed 
 for expences before a third of the term for 
 which they were deftined was expired ; 
 this was partly owing to his having been 
 led into fome parties which he ought to 
 have avoided, arid partly to his having paid 
 more attention to the voice of chanty and 
 benevolence than to the ftate of his finances j 
 but on all thefe occafions he had contrived 
 
 to
 
 EDWARD. 399 
 
 to balance his profufion at the beginning of 
 the term with fuch rigid ceconomy at the 
 end of it, as to preclude the neceffity of 
 applying for any other afliftance. In the 
 particular inftance mentioned above, where, 
 by the fraud of a companion, he was in- 
 volved in a much larger debt than he had 
 ever been before, he had prevailed on his 
 principal creditor to be fatisned with a par- 
 tial payment every three months, until the 
 whole debt fhould be extinguifhed ; but on 
 this man's death the truftees for his children 
 had ordered the letter to be written which 
 Edward found at his chambers on his return 
 from Mr. Temple's. 
 
 The perufal of this epiftle difturbed Ed- 
 ward greatly. The very laft time he had 
 been at Barnet-hall he had heard Mr. Barnet 
 complaining bitterly of certain demands of 
 money which had come unexpectedly. 
 This he was apt to do from habit ; for his 
 wife had entirely arranged his affairs, and 
 his expenditure was now confiderably un- 
 der his income. But Edward thought with 
 horror on any unufual demand being made 
 
 on
 
 400 EDWARD. 
 
 on his account, and confidered his having 
 riiked the money of his benefadors, and 
 putting them to any inconveniency, not 
 merely as imprudent, but as ungrateful. 
 This young man having during his child- 
 hood been plunged in adverfity, was invul- 
 nerable to many blows and crofs accidents 
 under which the profperous and effeminate 
 would have funk. The misfortunes of his 
 birth had peculiarly expofed him to the 
 feoff of pride and the idiot iheer of wealth; 
 thefe, however, he knew how to repel, and 
 had learned to defpife ; but remorfe was a 
 feeling to which he was unaccuflomed, and 
 it preyed on his mind with extreme acute- 
 nefs. Some parts of Mr. Temple's conver- 
 fation on their return from the country, 
 had awakened feelings of that nature. 
 Among other things he had faid, that thofe 
 who offered to be charitable or generous at 
 the expence of others^ were not charitable 
 nor generous at all. The letter which Ed- 
 ward now found at his chambers renewed 
 and augmented his difquietude, and brought 
 Mr. Temple's obfervation with pain into 
 
 his
 
 EDWARD. 401 
 
 Ms recollection. What Mr. Temple had 
 intended as a warning, Edward took for a 
 reproof: however juft, delicate, and well- 
 meant a remonftrance may be, it is apt to 
 create diflike to the giver in the breaft of 
 the perfon to whom it is given ; not only 
 becaufe it has an air of fuperiority, but alfo 
 becaufe it conveys the painful fentiment of 
 klf-condemnation. We often fee the minds 
 of people of this unhappy fpecies of fenfi- 
 bility alienated from their beft friends, their 
 benefactors, even their parents, merely be- 
 caufe they cannot bear the lead implication 
 of cenfure ; and this is ftill more infupport- 
 able if it comes from thofe to whom we 
 have rendered good offices. 
 
 Although Mr. Temple was perhaps the 
 hrft who ever gave Edward the irkfome 
 feeling above mentioned, it had an oppo- 
 fite effect on his mind ; he faw the friendly 
 motive from which it fprung, and he re- 
 jected every other fuggeftion ; he confider- 
 ed Mr. Temple more than ever as his friend. 
 Several pretty ftrong proofs of this young 
 man's ftrength of mind have been given, 
 
 VOL. i. D but
 
 402 EDWARD. 
 
 but none perhaps fo ftrong and fo uncom- 
 mon as this. He waited on Mr. Temple 
 the following day, and with many expref- 
 fions of blame of his own mifconduft, he- 
 unfolded the nature of his embarraflments. 
 Mr. Temple interrupted his felf-accufation,. 
 and faid every thing that could alleviate his 
 uneafmefs. "As for thefum you are in imme- 
 diate need of, fo far from being inconvenient 
 for me, my dear lad," faid Mr. Temple, " I 
 muft inform you that I am richer now than 
 ever." He then related his extraordinary 
 good fortune in obtaining the living ; " for 
 which," added he, " I am indebted to 
 fome unknown benefactor j becaufe being 
 unacquainted with the nobleman who gave 
 it me, notwithftanding his polite intimation 
 that he was prompted entirely by my gene- % 
 ral reputation, I am convinced it originates 
 in fome particular recommendation ; but be 
 that as it may, it enables me to advance 
 double the fum you need, and here it is." 
 
 Edward having thanked Mr. Temple, 
 refufed to accept of more than the precife 
 
 funv
 
 EDWARD. 403 
 
 fum he needed, which he faid he would 
 regularly pay by inftalments, in the fame 
 manner he had arranged with his former 
 creditor. When Mr. Temple objected to 
 this, Edward faid, " I am difpleafed with 
 myfelf ; this is a fenfation, my good Sir, 
 that you are unacquainted with ; but, take 
 my word for it, it is not pleafant, and I 
 am refolved to get free from it as foon as 
 I can ; but in my opinion that cannot be 
 done in any other way than by bearing the 
 burden of my own imprudence myfelf, and 
 not by placing it on the back of another." 
 When Mr. Temple attempted again to 
 conteft the point, and prevail on him not 
 to fubjecT: himfelf to fuch fevere reftridions, 
 Edward anfwered with a fmile, " Pray, 
 in this, allow me my own way ; why 
 (hould you prevent a man, who is in dif- 
 favour with himfelf, from ufmg the only 
 means that can reftore him to his own 
 good graces ?" 
 
 By much the mofl painful circumftance 
 in the execution of this ceconomical plan, 
 
 DD 2 tO
 
 404 EDWARD. 
 
 to which however he adhered until he had 
 accomplished his object, was its precluding 
 him from certain ads of chanty to which 
 he had been accuftomed. To feclude hiin- 
 felf from every other iburce of expence, 
 gave him infinitely lefs uneaimefs. He had 
 kept during a whole ieaibn from the opera, 
 though he was uncommonly fond of mu- 
 fic. He was at laft prevailed on to agree 
 to go to one which was much admired. 
 While he was dreffing, he heard a murmur- 
 ing of voices in the paiTage below ; on in- 
 quiry, he was told that it was occafioned by 
 a workman who had dropped half a guinea 
 that he had jull received for his week's 
 wages, which could not be found, and on 
 which his own maintenance, and that of 
 his wife and child, depended. It immedi- 
 ately ftruck Edward that he could aiford to 
 give the man the half guinea by flaying 
 from the opera that night. He accordingly 
 lent him the money and ftaid at home. On 
 another occafion, having been prevailed 
 on to promife to dine at a tavern with fome 
 young men of whole company he was fond, 
 9 he
 
 EDWARD. 405 
 
 he was foliated for charity at the tavern 
 door by a woman with an infant fuckling 
 at each of her breafts, and two half-naked 
 children following her. " For heaven's 
 fake, a penny," faid the poor woman, " to 
 purchafe fome bread." " We are very 
 hungry," cried the children. 
 
 Edward thrufting his hand in his pocket^ 
 found he had juft a guinea, and no other 
 money of any kind. " Good heaven," 
 thought he, " I am going to throw away 
 the greateft part of this on a dinner, and 
 it will maintain this poor woman and her 
 children a fortnight." He flipt the guinea 
 into the poor woman's hand, and return- 
 ing directly to his chamber, he fent an apo- 
 logy to the company, and dined with, more 
 delight on a mutton chop than he had ever 
 experienced from the moft luxurious 
 dinner. 
 
 While Edward had a free fund which 
 enabled him to perform certain acts of cha- 
 rity, he indulged in every elegant amufe- 
 ment for which he had a tafte, and which 
 DD 3 he
 
 406 EDWARD. 
 
 he could comprehend within the limits oi 
 his allowance} but while he was obliged to 
 curtail the firft, he could not bear to gratify 
 himfelf in the fecond on the occafions juft 
 mentioned.
 
 EDWARD. 407 
 
 c H A P. XL. 
 
 L'interet parle Routes fortes de langues, et joue toutes 
 Tories de perfonnages, meme celui de delinterefle. 
 
 ROCHEFOUCAULT. 
 
 *T*#E reader wiH remember, that when 
 Mr. Temple and Edward came to 
 town, Mr. Garnaby Shadow chofe to re- 
 main at the inn \ the confequence was, his 
 lofing a confiderable fum of money to Mr. 
 -Shuffle. The difficulties which this occa- 
 lioned obliged him to apply for a fupply to 
 his aunt, a lady we have not before had 
 occafion to mention. She was eldeft fitter 
 to Lady Bab Maukifh, with whom {he had 
 quarrelled upon account of her firft mar- 
 riage with Mr. Shadow, thinking fuch an 
 alliance with a commoner difgraceful to 
 their family. This mifunderftanding be- 
 tween the fifters continued until the death 
 of Mr. Shadow, when his widow mewed 
 fuch an excefs of affliction, that her life was 
 D D 4 faid
 
 4o3 E D W A R D, 
 
 faid to be in danger, on which her fitter, 
 whofe maiden name was Virginia, relented, 
 and made a vifit to the difconfolate widow. 
 This produced a reconciliation ; for Lady 
 Virginia, notwithftanding her family pride, 
 was of an affectionate difpofition. In the 
 courfe of this renewed intimacy, Lady Vir- 
 ginia became fo exceedingly fond of her 
 fitter's Ton Carnaby,that their mutual friends 
 flattered themfelves that this circumttance 
 would form a bond of permanent union 
 between the two fitters ; and fo it probably 
 would, had not the wrath of Lady Virginia 
 been re-kindled in the moft provoking man- 
 ner ; for Lady Bab not only married ano- 
 ther commoner, but (he married him at the 
 very time that her tender-hearted fitter 
 thought her in danger of dying of grief for 
 the lofs of the firft. Her Ladyfhip was fo 
 {hocked with this new ftain on the family, 
 that me could not abftain from fome ftrong 
 expreflions on the meannefs of her fitter's 
 conduct in the prefence of her maid, who^ 
 being inclined to apologize for Lady Bab, 
 
 obferved,
 
 EDWARD. 409 
 
 obferved, " that although a Lord was un- 
 doubtedly preferable as a hufband to a Com- 
 moner ; yet, as Lady Bab had now married 
 two Commoners, {he might be confidered as 
 on a footing with any Lady of quality, who 
 had been the wife of only one Lord." 
 
 Lady Virginia rejected, with indignation, 
 the idea of two Commoners being equiva- 
 lent to one Lord ; and her ill-humour was 
 augmented, becaufe the maid's fuggeftion 
 reminded her, that her younger fitter had 
 been married twice, xvhile fhe was ftill 
 without a hufband. She told the maid, 
 therefore, that her notion of things was vul- 
 gar and grofs ; that the circumftance of her 
 having had two hufbands aggravated the 
 impropriety of her fitter's conduct ; that the 
 utmoft length a woman of virtue could go, 
 was to fubmit, for once in her life, to the 
 ceremony of matrimony, and all its odious 
 confequences ; but the idea of two hufbands, 
 even although they were both Peers, would 
 revolt the heart of every woman of true 
 delicacy. 
 
 "Does
 
 4io E D W A R D. 
 
 " Does your Ladyfhip believe," laid the 
 maid, " that, befides your Ladylhip's felf f 
 there is a vaft number of women of true 
 delicacy in England ?" 
 
 Lady Virginia, better pleafed with this 
 queftion than fhe had been with the maid's 
 former obfervation, anfwered, with a fmile, 
 *' That fhe hoped there were." 
 
 This fecond offence would have produced 
 an irreparable oreach between the fifters, 
 had it not been for the augmenting affection 
 of Lady Virginia for her nephew; who, as 
 he grew up, did not permit her pafiion to 
 exhale in fentiment, but brought it to re- 
 peated tefts, which a weak paffion would 
 not have flood and in a fhort time all the 
 money (he had inverted in the public funds 
 was exhaufled. The principal part of her 
 fortune, however, confided of a land eflate, 
 of which fhe was co-heirefs with her fitter, 
 a. circumflance which rendered it difficult 
 for Lady Virginia to obtain money on 
 mortgage. 
 
 After Mr. Shuffle had received all that 
 lie had won from Carnaby, he perceived, 
 
 that
 
 EDWARD. 4M 
 
 that whatever his future fuecefs at play 
 might be, difficulties would occur refpedting 
 the payment which he was defirous of ob- 
 viating, and with this view he fuggefted to 
 the young man, that nothing could be more 
 ridiculous than for his mother's and aunt's 
 fortunes to remain in their prefent ftate ; 
 that it would be infinitely more convenient 
 for them, and for him alfo, to have it di- 
 vided, that each fifter .might difpofe of her 
 own as (he pleafed. 
 
 Carnaby, being ftruck with the propriety 
 of this friendly hint, without much difficulty 
 prevailed on Lady Virginia to permit him 
 to make the propofal to his mother, who 
 having confulted her hufband on the fub- 
 jecl:, Sir Mathew prefented Carnaby with a 
 plan of divifion, by which he faid both 
 fillers would be accommodated, becaufe 
 Lady Bab would have the half which lay 
 neareft fome land of his, while Lady Vir- 
 ginia would have that portion which was 
 moft valuable in itfelf. 
 
 Carnaby being fatisfied with this account 
 of the matter, prefented Sir Mathew's plan 
 
 to
 
 4 i2 EDWARD. 
 
 to his aunt; but when fhe fubmhted it to 
 the confideration of her fteward, he affured 
 her that Sir Mathew had committed a mif- 
 take in his eftimate, as the half defUned for 
 his fpoufe was not only the moft commo- 
 dious from the circumftances he had men- 
 tioned, but alfo, by much, the moil valuable 
 in all other refpecls. 
 
 Carnaby, on the other hand, ftill perfifted 
 that the eftimate was equal and fair. 
 
 The fteward, on the contrary, aflerted, 
 that the fuperior value of Lady Bab's 
 portion' was fo evident, that nothing but 
 Carnaby's partiality .for his mother could 
 prevent him from feeing it. In this aiTer- 
 tion the fteward was miftaken ; for Carnaby 
 really preferred his aunt ; but the flighted 
 idea of conveniericy to himfelf over-ba- 
 lanced any regard he had for either. 
 
 Lady Virginia, being kept fteady by the 
 admonitions of her fteward, and other 
 friends,withftood her nephew's importunities 
 in this inftancc, on which he left her difap- 
 pointed,and in an exceeding ill-humour. He 
 even aflumed the airs of an injured perfon; 
 
 and
 
 EDWARD. 413 
 
 and being convinced that (he would not be 
 able to fupport his coldnefs and difpleafure, 
 he refrained from viiiting her. Her Ladyfhip- 
 being thus deprived of the pleafure of fee- 
 ing her affectionate nephew, went to pafs 
 two months at a fafhtonable watering-place, 
 at a confiderable diftance from London, and 
 near the new living which Mr. Temple had 
 fo unexpectedly obtained, and to which he 
 had lately tranfported his whole family, de- 
 termined to make it his chief refidence. 
 
 Mifs Louifa Barnet accompanied her aunt 
 on this occafion. The reader is already 
 acquainted with. Mrs. Barnet's reafons for 
 permitting her daughter to be often, and 
 for confiderable intervals, abfent from her 
 father's family ; fhe had pafled moft of the 
 preceding feafon at London in the family of 
 Mrs. Eafy, a woman of character and gen- 
 teelly connected, with whofe daughter Mifs 
 Barnet had formed a great intimacy at the 
 boarding- fchool. On this account Mrs. 
 Eafy had vifited Mrs. Barnet, and entreated 
 her to allow her daughter to pafs fome time 
 at her houfe in town, that the two young 
 
 ladies
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 ladies might cultivate the friendfhip which 
 had begun at fchool. To this propofal Mrs. 
 Barnet aflented the more readily, as Mrs* 
 Eafy was a widow Lady, highly efteemed 
 for the real worth of her character, and the 
 elegance of her manners, in whofe company 
 Mifs Barnet had opportunities of being in*- 
 troduced to the mofl fafhionable aflemblies. 
 
 The tafte which the young lady acquired 
 for the amufements of the capital, during a 
 few months refldence there, rendered thofe 
 of the country entirely infipid to her. Mrs. 
 Barnet obierved this with much pain at her 
 daughter's return to her father's houfe ; and 
 on Mrs. Temple's defiring to have her 
 niece's company at her new refldence, Mrs. 
 Barnet confented with pleafure, as a likely 
 plan for reconciling her daughter's mind to 
 an abfence from London ; and alfo becaufe 
 fhe could not be in better company than in 
 Mr. and Mrs. Temple's, nor in worfe, in 
 fome refpeds, than in Mr. Barnet's. 
 
 Mr. Temple's houfe was fo near the wa- 
 tering-place, that he was almoft daily there 
 with the two ladies. And here the flight 
 3 acquaintance
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 acquaintance which Mifs Barnet had for- 
 merly had with Lady Virginia grew into a 
 confiderable degree of intimacy. Lady 
 Virginia was entirely obliged to her title 
 for the obfequious attention which Mifs 
 Barnet paid her, and which won her Lady- 
 fhip's heart to fuch a degree, that fhe would 
 have been well pleafed to fee her the wife of 
 her nephew Mr.Carnaby Shadow, although it 
 had long been her earneft wifh that he fhould 
 marry a woman of quality, and by that 
 means drminifh that corruption of blood 
 derived from his father, which was to 'be 
 tranfmitted to his own innocent children. 
 Independent of Mifs Barnet's beauty and 
 accomplifhments, Lady Virginia was in- 
 duced to make this facrifice, in confideratiorr 
 of the young lady's being the reputed heirefs 
 of a greater fortune than any unmarried 
 woman of quality of her acquaintance. 
 From the inftant that this idea ftruck her, 
 me took every opportunity of founding the 
 praifes of her nephew in the ears of Mifs 
 Barnet, defcribing him as the moft elegant, 
 
 handfome,
 
 416 EDWARD. 
 
 handfome, and accomplished youth in Eng- 
 land. The young lady, however, had feen 
 Mr. Carnaby once or twice at iome aflem- 
 blies in the capital, and had formed a juft 
 enough notion of his value. As fhe heard 
 the exaggerated praifes of the aunt with a 
 fmiling countenance, interrupting them only 
 with the interjections Admirable ! Really ! 
 Wonderful ! and the like, Lady Virginia 
 was periuaded that the young Lady's ima- 
 gination was already warmed in favour of 
 Carnaby, who, fhe thought, had only to 
 appear, that he might fecure his conqueft 
 over Mifs Barnet's heart. In this perfuafion 
 Ihe wrote to her nephew. Carnaby re- 
 ceived jhe letter juft as he had pulled en 
 his boots preparatory to his morning lounge 
 in Bond-ftreet. 
 
 " O ho !" cried he, as the letter was de- 
 livered to him ; " this comes from the old 
 girl ; I thought we fhould hear from her 
 foon ; let us fee what (he has to fay." 
 Carnaby then read Lady Virginia's letter, 
 commenting on it as he read in the follow- 
 ing manner : 
 
 "My
 
 EDWARD. 4I7 
 
 " My dear nephew,'* (Damned dear, to 
 be fure, when you refufed Sir Mathew's 
 plan of divifion, faid he ; and then recom- 
 menced the reading as follows:) 
 
 " My dear nephew, Notwithftanding your 
 late unkind behaviour, I have never ceafed 
 to be your friend, and to think how I 
 might be of the moft effe&ual fervice to 
 you, of which I will give you a convincing 
 proof, if you will fet out for this place as 
 foon as you receive this letter.*' (So, fo, 
 faid Carnaby, interrupting the reading, I 
 fuppofe fhe has come round at laft, and is to 
 confent to the divifion Well, let us go on.) 
 u What I have to communicate is of the 
 greateft importance to your happinefs and 
 fortune 5" (Ay, to be fure it is j) * but," 
 (But what the devil is this ?) " but I refrain 
 from mentioning it nowj" (Why the deuce 
 fhould fhe refrain mentioning what is 
 of fo much importance ?) tc becaufe it h 
 of a nature not to be trufted on paper." 
 (The deed of divifion, undoubtedly, muft 
 be written on parchment, but fhe might 
 have faid, on paper , that Ihe would agree to 
 
 VOL. I. E E it.)
 
 E D W A R D. 
 
 it.) " Befides, if I fhould inform you now, 
 you might mention it to fomebody before 
 you left town." ( Weil, and what if I 
 did ?) u But that which I have to propofe 
 to you ought to be kept a profound fecret, 
 until it is concluded." ( I fee no great ufc 
 for that.) cc And you know, my dear 
 Cirnaby, that you never could keep a 
 fecret in your life." ( Nor you neither, 
 my dear Lady Virginia ; indeed, I am a 
 little furpifed at your being able to keep this 
 bottled up till you fee me ; it would have 
 been more in character, if you had poured 
 it all forth on the paper before you folded 
 it up. But what is this? faid he, looking 
 at the bottom of the page, and feeing the 
 words turn over. Here is more ! He 
 then read on the other page :) " On fecond 
 thoughts, I cannot bear to keep you in fuf- 
 pence ; I will, therefore, inform you of this 
 bufmefs without any farther delay ; for I 
 know you are naturally impatient," 
 (.Curfe the woman, why does not (lie out 
 with it ?) <c and always was fo ever fince 
 your childhood ;" ( Egad, fhe will con- 
 tinue
 
 EDWARD. 419 
 
 tinue prattling till the end of the paper ; and, 
 perhaps, forget the fecret at laft. But let 
 us fee, where was I ?) " ever fmce your 
 childhood ; which difpofition you inherited 
 from my dear father, who was reckoned 
 one of the moft impatient Peers of the 
 realm, particularly before dinner ;" 
 ( Zounds ! this is what the Duchefs of 
 . calls Clijh-ma claiver. Well, what 
 
 comes next ?) " although his Lordfhip was a 
 man of dignified deportment, and a philofo- 
 phical turn when he was not rendered 
 peevifli and pafiionate by hunger or contra- 
 diction ; two things he never could bear. 
 Well, the fecret I have to communicate to 
 you is neither more nor lefs than this," 
 (Thank heaven, here it comes at laft!) "that 
 you may, if you pleafe, have a beautiful 
 young Lady, with a great fortune, in mar- 
 riage; for I have already prepoflefied her en- 
 tirely in your favour ;" (Well, who the devil 
 is this beautiful young Lady? O ! here fhe is ;) 
 *' and this young Lady is Mifs Louifa Barnet, 
 who, befides her beauty and fortune, is en- 
 2 dowed
 
 4 ao E D \V A R D. 
 
 dowed with many accomplifhments. That 
 fhe is not of noble birth, but of mere city 
 extraction, is, doubtlefs, to be regretted," 
 (I thought that would be a rub,) parti- 
 cularly by you, my dear, whofe blood is con- 
 taminated from the fame polluted fource ;" 
 (Curfe the old malicious cat !} " for which, 
 by the by, I am not to blame ;" (And am 
 I ? the devil is got into the woman ; am I to 
 be blamed for this more than fhe is ?) " for, 
 had your mother" (Ay, to be fure my mo- 
 ther had fome hand in the bufmefs) fol- 
 lowed my advice, and married a Peer, then, 
 my dear," (Ay, what then, my dear ?) " you 
 would have been of noble blood by both 
 your parents ;" (Hem, egad I am not quite 
 fure how that might have turned out let 
 me confider. My prefent mother's fon 
 would not, in that cafe, have been the fon 
 of my late father ; nay, he might not have 
 been a fon at all, and then, the Lord only 
 knows what would have become of me ; I 
 might, for what I know, inftead of a boy, 
 have been a girl. I fhould not have re- 
 lifhed that ; for although I fhould have been 
 
 probably
 
 EDWARD. 421 
 
 probably a very pretty girl, and although 
 women are better off now than in the days 
 of yore, yet I fancy I am better as I am. 
 Formerly it was a terrible bore to be a 
 woman ; now, to be fure, they have a good 
 deal more liberty ; they jaunt about every 
 where as freely as the men ; but ftill I 
 don't think I fhould ever have been brought 
 to like being a woman ; I could never have 
 learnt to keep my feat on horfeback with 
 both legs on the fame fide, like a woman. 
 Between friends, I do not think I fhould 
 ever have been fo difmterefted and fo affec- 
 tionate as a woman ; I am convinced I 
 never fhould have been modeft like a wo- 
 man. Then, there is the bearing of chil- 
 dren ah, that is the very devil ! It is clear 
 I am much better as I am ; and, upon the 
 whole, my dear aunt, I am better pleafed 
 that my mother did not follow your ad- 
 vice. But let us fee what more you have 
 to fay, added Carnaby, and then began again 
 to read the letter;) " of noble blood by both 
 your parents ; but that opportunity being 
 now loft, a marriage with this young Lady 
 E E 3 will
 
 422 E D W A R D. 
 
 will be very convenient for you in you,r pre- 
 fent circumftances, and ought to be accom- 
 pliftied without any delay.*' 
 
 " Thank my flars, I have reached the end 
 at laft," cried he, after drawing a long breath. 
 Well, upon my foul, I have no objection, to 
 the old girl's icheme ; Mifs Barnet is a de- 
 vilifh pretty girl; Lady Hornbury had her at 
 fome of her aflemblies ; the moft fafhionable 
 young fellows in town followed and admired 
 her. On my confcience, I believe ihe. would 
 make an excellent wife ; our houfe would 
 be always full of the beft company. 1 * 
 
 So faying, he ordered apoft-chaife-and- 
 four, refolving to fet out directly on a vifit 
 to his aunt.
 
 EDWARD. 423 
 
 CHAP. XLI. 
 
 j-.'|rtifice et le menfonge font da grandes marques etc la 
 foiblefle et de la petitefie de 1'efprit humain, comme 
 la faufle monnoie 1'eft de la pauvrete 
 
 ROCHEFOUCAULT. 
 
 1 UST as Mr. Shadow was going. Sir Georg 
 * Royfton was introduced. Carnaby had 
 long wifhed to be on an intimate footing 
 with Sir George, who on his part had 
 rather flighted the acquaintance. His ob- 
 ject in calling at prefent was to learn from 
 Carnaby what was become of the failor's 
 wife they hacj feen at the inn. 
 
 Sir George had been greatly difappointed 
 by her not calling at his houfe as he had 
 expected, and he now hoped that Mr. 
 Shadow would be able to give him fome 
 account of her. 
 
 Carnaby frankly informed him that he. 
 
 had been inquiring after her himfelf, and 
 
 underftood that Mr. Temple had entirely 
 
 4 reconciled
 
 424 EDWARD. 
 
 reconciled her father, under whofe protec- 
 tion fhe then was in lodgings, within a few 
 doors of his matter's houfe. 
 
 " Damn thofe parfons," faid Sir George, 
 on hearing this account; " they are the 
 moft officious fellows in the world, and 
 continually fp oiling fport." 
 
 " I expect a piece of fervice from one of 
 them, however," faid Garnaby ; " perhaps 
 from this very Reverend Mr. Temple, 
 which I hope will turn out very well." 
 
 " You have no defign to be married, 
 have you ?" 
 
 My defign is a fecret." 
 
 " If that be your project, you expect a 
 great fortune of courfe." 
 
 Carnaby nodded and fmiled. 
 
 " What ! a very great fortune ?" 
 
 Another nod from Carnaby. 
 
 This excited Sir George's curiofity, and 
 he refolved to know the name of the Lady. 
 
 " You are too clofe and referved, no 
 doubt, to intruft the name of the happy 
 female even with an intimate friend." 
 
 Carnaby
 
 EDWARD. 425 
 
 Carnaby was greatly pleafed to be in- 
 formed from fuch good authority, that he 
 was the intimate friend of a perfon of fuch 
 long eftablifhed reputation, as a man of 
 fafhion and knowledge of the town, as Sir 
 George Roy (Ion. 
 
 Carn. Nay, I fhould never have thought 
 of making a myftery of the matter to you, 
 but the fecret is my aunt's. 
 
 Sir Geo. I fufpe&ed as much ; aunts 
 and mothers are wonderful promoters of 
 matrimony. Well, I can have no intereft 
 in this, my dear Shadow, but in as far as 
 your happinefs and reputation are concerned, 
 and an aunt is no doubt a better judge of 
 thofe than a friend. 
 
 Carn. I am far from being of that 
 opinion ; and to {hew you that I have no 
 kind of referve with you, Sir George, I will 
 freely tell you that the party fhe has in 
 view for me is Mifs Louifa Barnet, who 
 you may have feen laft winter, with Mrs. 
 and Mifs Eafy, at the opera and at fome af- 
 iemblies ; fhe was a good deal admired j fhe 
 
 is
 
 426 E D W A R D. 
 
 is an only child, her father is very rich, 
 and is old and infirm. 
 
 Sir Geo. I remember to have feenthe girl; 
 but I had no idea of her being an enly 
 child ; I thought {he had a- brother. 
 
 Cam. No, thank you; if fhe had a bro- 
 ther, they fhould juft as foon perfuade me 
 to marry him as her. 
 
 Sir Geo. Well, but are you fure that 
 Barnet's fortune is fo immenfe ? 
 
 Cam. Of that there is no doubt. I have 
 heard Sir Mathew, my father-in-law, who 
 thinks of nothing but money, and knows 
 the ftate of all old Barnet's affairs, declare 
 that he was exceedingly rich. 
 
 This account of Mifs Barnet's expecta- 
 tions gave Sir George the idea of a project, 
 for the accomplishment of which he deter- 
 mined to turn Carnaby from his prefent 
 purfuit. 
 
 Sir Geo. You call Barnet old; I have 
 feen the man, and to tell you the truth, my 
 friend, I do not think him old enough for 
 your purpofe. 
 
 Cam,
 
 EDWARD. 427 
 
 Cam. He is very infirm, befides being 
 old. 
 
 Sir Gto. I do not know what you call 
 infirm ; he is as fat as a hog, and, as I 
 have been told, eats like a cormorant. 
 
 Cam. That I confefs he does ; but he is 
 laid up half the year with the gout. 
 
 Sir Geo. The gout, my good friend, is a 
 difeafe not to be depended upon. Old La- 
 vifh the nabob had it for twenty years ; and 
 poor Tom, his eldeft fan, endured all the 
 torment of Tantalus for the laft four years 
 of the old fellow's life. It was doubtful 
 whether the father fuffered moft from the 
 gout, or the fon from difappointment. 
 Poor Tom often aflured me, when he faw 
 his father recover fit after fit, that he was 
 convinced that the gout is a difeafe which 
 prolongs rather thanftortens life ; fo that I 
 would riot have you to rely too much on 
 the gout, for unqueftionably it is a very 
 deceitful diftemper. 
 
 Cam. Independent of her fortune, how- 
 ever, Mifs Barnet is a very pretty girl. 
 
 Sir
 
 428 E D W A R D. 
 
 Sir Geo. So are fifty girls in London, 
 who may be had for a couple of guineas. 
 I hope you have no defign to imitate your 
 acquaintance Bob Whimfy, who propofes 
 marriage to every girl he meets with a tole- 
 rable face ; and who, becaufe he finds no 
 happinefs in frifking from one aflembly to 
 another, imagines he is formed for matri- 
 mony and retirement. 
 
 Cam. Imitate ! Imitate Whimfy ! 
 
 Sir Geo. I beg pardon, dear Carnaby ; 
 nobody will fufpect you of imitation ; and 
 all the world knows that a man of fenfe 
 would never imitate a coxcomb and fool ; 
 but I could not help thinking of Whimfy, 
 when you mentioned Mifs Barnet's beauty 
 as a reafon for marrying her; becaufe in 
 my opinion her {hare of beauty is but mo- 
 derate. She has none of the elegant lan- 
 guor of high fafhion ; fhe feemed to me 
 to be remarkable only for the vulgar bloom 
 of a milk- maid, and the pert look of a 
 French milliner. Pray how old is fhe? 
 
 Carn. I fhould guefs about feventeen. 
 
 Sir
 
 EDWARD. 429 
 
 Sir Geo. What an awful age for a wife, 
 my dear friend ! why you can have no 
 hopes of feeing an end to her ; had (he 
 been feventy, indeed, I fhould have advifed 
 you to venture ; though, to fay the truth, 
 I had no notion of your being a marrying 
 man. I thought you would have rather 
 liked to have been a little longer at the 
 head of fafhion. 
 
 Carn. Marrying has been a good deal 
 
 the fafhion of late. 
 
 Sir Geo. Not near fo much as keeping. 
 Nothing gives a young fellow the air of a 
 quiz fo much as being married. 
 
 Carn. To fay the truth, I ufed to have as 
 great an averfion to being married as any 
 man in England. The fcheme, I have al- 
 ready told you, is my aunt's ; fhe has 
 brought it on without confulting me. 
 
 Sir Geo. Then you have a title to break 
 it off without confulting her; for depend 
 upon it, my young friend, that matrimony 
 is a curfed bore for one at your time of 
 life ; and, like a defperate throw at dice, it 
 3 ought
 
 43o E D W A R D. 
 
 ought not to be rifked until a man is at tne 
 brink of ruin, and has no other refource. 
 
 The effect of this converfation was, that 
 Carnaby countermanded the poft-chaife, 
 and wrote to Lady Virginia that indifpen- 
 fable bufmefs put it out of his power to 
 wait on her. Sir George then prevailed 
 on his friend Colonel Snug to invite Car- 
 naby to accompany him to Newmarket, 
 where he was foon to go with a fmall 
 party for the trial of fome horfes, which he 
 knew would be flattering to Carnaby, and 
 keep him from difturbing the project which 
 he himfelf had formed, and in confequence 
 of which he fet out for the Wells near Mr, 
 Temple's.
 
 EDWARD. 431 
 
 CHAP. XLII. 
 
 Veniunt a dote fagitt. JUVEK. 
 
 CIR George had not only fquandered his 
 paternal eftate, but a large fum of mo- 
 ney left him by a relation. The whole had 
 been diflipated in expenfive living and 
 gaming ; no part of it had been beftowed 
 from any benevolent or generous motive, 
 and very little for any friendly or charitable 
 purpofe. What Pifo faid of Otho might 
 alf be faid of Sir George Perderc ifte fczef, 
 donarc nefcict. He dill retained, however, 
 a genteel perfon, and the airs and manners 
 of a man of fafhion. As the extent of his 
 mortgages were not known, although he 
 was poor in reality, he was ftill fo rich ia 
 refources, that he feemed as affluent as the 
 mod wealthy. Having been for fome time 
 reduced to that defperate ftate which, he 
 10 thought,
 
 432 EDWARD. 
 
 thought, juftified a man of fenfe for marry- 
 ing, he had already made fome unfuccefsful 
 attempts at a match fuitable to his circtim- 
 ftances. Notwithftanding his having hi- 
 therto failed, his ill fuccefs could not be im- 
 puted to any romantic refinement in his 
 choice, like thofe unreafonable men who, 
 unmindful of their own deficiencies, expect 
 every excellence of the mind and body in 
 the woman they honour with their hand. 
 Sir George was even willing to wave cer- 
 tain qualities, which have been thought by 
 the moft reafonable men neceflary : for ex- 
 ample, he did not pofitively infift that his 
 fpoufe fhould have either much good fenfe 
 or goodnefs of difpofition ; and as for that 
 modefty, gentlenefs, and even'timidity of de- 
 portment, which fome people admire fo much 
 in thefair fex, he refolved,that he would dif- 
 penfe with them alfo, being fenfible that they 
 were feldom to be met with in that clafs of 
 women from which alone he would accept 
 of a wife. In fhort, he was determined 
 not to object to any woman for being ever 
 fo arrogant and proud, provided her purfe 
 
 was
 
 EDWARD. 433 
 
 was in proportion to her pride. What made 
 Sir George Royfton the more eafily dif- 
 penfe with mental accomplimments in his 
 wife was, his being fully fatisfied that he 
 himfelf pofleffed a quantity fufficient for 
 both. The only article in which he could 
 be thought in the fmalleft degree difficult, 
 was that in which he was confcious of 
 being deficient himfelf; in all other points 
 he was eafy, and ready to facrifice his own 
 particular tafte ; which would have led 
 him to prefer a very old woman, or one 
 in a declining ftate of health, had he 
 not made up his mind not to rejecl any 
 woman, however youthful and healthy me 
 might be, who was fufficiently provided in 
 the main article ; and, therefore, when 
 mention was made of Mifs Barnet's fortune, 
 with the flattering circumftance of her fa- 
 ther's ill ftate of health, he refolved to pay 
 his addreffes to her, notwithftanding her 
 youth, arid in defiance of every indication 
 of perfect health and a lading conftkution. 
 
 Having diduaded Carnaby from Ihe pro- 
 fecution of a project which he himfelf in- 
 
 VOL. i. F F tended
 
 434 EDWARD. 
 
 tended to adopt, he foon after appeared at 
 the Wells with a brilliant equipage, and 
 accompanied by a young Peer, whom he 
 had prevailed '.on to go with him, for the 
 fame reafdn that he had put his footmen in 
 new liveries ; and when the fimple youth 
 had, by his title, ferved to give a little eclat to 
 Sir George's firft appearance, having no 
 farther ufe for him, but rinding his Lordfhip 
 rather an incumbrance, he prevailed on him 
 to return to London. 
 
 Sir George's firft care was to pay his court 
 to Lady Virginia, at whofe houfe he foon 
 met with Mrs. Temple and Mils Barnet; 
 he cultivated the favour of the former with 
 the moft refpedful attention ; making it at 
 the lame time fully underftood by the latter, 
 that it was entirely on her account. 
 
 The rank which Sir Ggorge Royfton 
 fuftained in the world of fafliion, the eafy 
 aiTurance of his manners, the elegance of 
 his drefs, the gaiety of his converfation, 
 rendered more mining by the names of 
 Earls and Countefies, Dukes and Duchefies, 
 which were liberally interfperfed through 
 
 all
 
 EDWARD. 435 
 
 all hi& narratives, rendered him agreeable 
 to Lady Virginia, who did not fee his 
 drift fo well as Mifs Barnet, while his art- 
 ful behaviour to Mrs. Temple gave her a 
 more favourable opinion of him than might 
 feem confident .with her ufual good fenfe 
 and difeernment: but who has not remarked 
 inftances of both good fenfe and difcern- 
 ment being lulled by artful and perfevering 
 flattery ? 
 
 Sir George's progrefs in the good graces 
 ef Mifs Barnet was affifted by an incident. 
 A Lady of rank and beauty appeared on the 
 fcene, and attracted univerfal attention. As 
 Sir George was of her acquaintance, and 
 made a more brilliant figure than any other 
 man at the place, me expected that his 
 chief attention mould be paid to her. As 
 this Lady was a woman of quality, and 
 as Louifa Barnet' s heart was not at all con- 
 cerned in the connection me wilhed to 
 maintain with Sir George, (he would have 
 been fatisfied with a fair divifion of his ho- 
 mage, but when me found the Lady aiming 
 at the whole, me determined me mould have 
 F F 2 none
 
 436 EDWARD. 
 
 none of it. From the moment fhe formed 
 this refolution, as often as Sir George, after 
 having fpoken to the Lady in queftion, 
 began to addrefs Louifa, the latter aflumed 
 fuch an air of coldnefs, that a ftranger would 
 naturally have thought that fhe was very 
 little acquainted with him, and wimed to be 
 lefs. 
 
 Finding that the leaft attention paid to 
 the one was incompatible with his views 
 on' the other, Sir George took no more 
 notice of his old acquaintance, and was im- 
 mediately taken into favour by his new. 
 
 Mifs Barnet became inftantly attentive ta 
 his difcourie, feemed to admire his bon mots y 
 for he had the reputation of a wit, and {he 
 even heard his mod unfuccefsful attempts 
 with a fmile of approbation : he \vas her 
 conftant partner at the ailemblies, and a 
 frequent vifitor at Mr. Temple's houfe. 
 Hitherto that gentleman had been abfent; his 
 arrival difconcerted Sir George's fcheme ; 
 he knew enough of the Baronet's character 
 to be perfuaded that he was an "exceedingly 
 improper acquaintance for Louifa ; and he 
 
 blamed-
 
 EDWARD. 437 
 
 blamed his wife for having countenanced 
 that degree of intimacy on which they were. 
 
 Mrs. Temple was convinced of her error ; 
 this fhe owed to her good fenfe. She ac- 
 knowledged her conviction ; and this pro- 
 ceeded from her good temper ; a quality 
 fully as valuable, and, perhaps, more rare 
 than the other. She expreffed fo much un- 
 eafmefs, that her hufband began to juftify, 
 inftead of continuing to blame her conduct. 
 She mentioned to Mifs Barnet what her 
 hufband had told her refpecling Sir George's 
 character and circumftances. The niece re- 
 plied, that it could not be expected that the 
 life of a gay man of fafhion would, in all 
 points, be agreeable to the fenti merits of a 
 clergyman ; and as for his circumilances, 
 they were nothing to her. 
 
 Mrs. Temple then advifed her niece, very 
 earneftly, to "drop his acquaintance. 
 
 The young Lady thanked her for the 
 friendly advice, with an air that gave the 
 aunt a notion that fhe would not adopt it : 
 in this Ihe was confirmed the following day, 
 when fhe underftood that letters had pa (Ted 
 F F 3 between
 
 438 EDWARD. 
 
 between Sir George and her niece ; and 
 when fhe heard her expreis a defire of 
 going to a ball at the Wells the week fol- 
 lowing. With her hufband's approbation, 
 Mrs. Temple wrote that very day to Mrs. 
 Barnet. 
 
 Sir George Royfton had made fome at- 
 tempts to gain the good will of Mr. Temple, 
 but was loon convinced, by the cold polite- 
 nefs of that gentleman's behaviour, that he 
 would not fucceed ; he laid his account, 
 therefore, with meeting obflacles from that 
 quarter; but he flattered himfelf that oppofi- 
 tion would provoke the young Lady, render 
 her lover dearer to her than before, and, by 
 giving the intrigue fomething of a romantic 
 air, haften the accomplishment of his fcheme. 
 He tried to draw her into a regular corre- 
 fpondence with him by letters, but only a 
 few notes had hitherto pafTed between them, 
 and thefe related merely to the intended 
 ball : he had fent his firft note in a myfte- 
 rious manner, but fhe returned her anfwer 
 openly ; he had even at one time thrown 
 out a vague hint refpecting a jaunt to the 
 
 North,
 
 EDWARD. 439 
 
 North, and had already made certain pre- 
 parations for putting fuch a fcheme in exe- 
 cution, being fully perfuaded that he would, 
 in a fhort time, prevail on the young Lady 
 to adopt it. 
 
 In this, it is probable, he over-rated 
 the degree of favour in which he flood 
 with Mifs Barnet. She had nothing in view 
 but the gratification of vanity, by engroffing 
 the affiduities of the moft fafliionable man 
 of the place : and this experienced man of 
 the town was fo blinded by the fame paflion, 
 as to believe her to be ferioufly fond of 
 him ; he imputed to love what belonged to 
 coquetry. 
 
 How often do we fee men of experience, 
 and even fhrewdnefs, act as weakly, and of 
 courfe more ridiculoufly than a girl, through 
 vanity ! 
 
 FP 4
 
 440 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XLIII. 
 
 No fingle virtue we could mod commend, 
 Whether the wife, the mother, or the friend ; 
 For fhe was all in that fupreme degree 
 That as no one prevailed, fo all was fhe. 
 The feveral parts lay hidden in the piece ; 
 Th' occafion but exerted that or this. 
 
 DRYUEN. 
 
 JV/TRS. Barnet fet out for the houfe of Mr. 
 Temple an hour after receiving his 
 wife's letter. Mr. and Mrs. Temple 
 feemed as much furprifed at Mrs. Barnet's 
 arrival, as her daughter was in reality. She 
 entered with a cheerful countenance, feemed 
 to he in high fpirits, and in the beft hu- 
 mour, with Mifs Barnet in particular. 
 She informed the young Lady, however, 
 that her father was impatient to fee her ; 
 and hinted that fhe herfelf had fomething 
 of importance to communicate, which fhe 
 
 would
 
 EDWARD. 441 
 
 vjrould referve until they were in the car- - 
 jiage on their return. 
 
 Mifs Barnet could not ftelp fhewing un- 
 eafinefs at the mention cf her returning, 
 and began to meditate fome excufe or pre- 
 text for prolonging her flay. This did not 
 efcape the penetrating eye of her mother, 
 who again mentioned, in terms calculated 
 to excite her daughter's curicfity, that fhe 
 had fometning of a very interefting and 
 agreeable nature to fpeak of to her. In 
 this manner fhe prevented her daughter 
 from making any objection to returning, 
 although fhe had two or three times deter- 
 mined upon it, and was juft ready to ftate 
 her objections, when Mrs. Barnet difcon- 
 certed her plan, by roufing her curiofity, 
 and turning her attention to another fub- 
 jecl:. The mother fucceeded fo completely, 
 that the daughter was occupied the whole 
 night in thinking what the important and 
 interefting bufmefs could be which her mo~ 
 ther referved for her private ear when they 
 fhoulci. be tete a the in the carriage ; and 
 
 3 Mifs
 
 442 EDWARD. 
 
 Mifs Harriet's curiofity at laft became fo 
 vexatious,- that' inftead of making objec- 
 tions to their departure, fhe was ready 
 before her mother to fet out in the morn- 
 ing ; which they did, after Mifs Barnet 
 had written a note to Sir George, to inform 
 him that it would not be in her power to 
 dance with him at the ball, becaufe fhe was 
 obliged to accompany her mother home. 
 
 When Mrs. Barnet was feated in the 
 carriage, fhe had a ftory prepared for her 
 daughter's amufement fufficiently interefl> 
 ing to form the bafis of their converfation 
 during the whole journey, which termi- 
 nated on the very evening on which Sir 
 George Royfton was to have met her at 
 the ball. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet had determined from the 
 firft to feem entirely ignorant of her daugh- 
 ter's having any acquaintance with that 
 gentleman, to avoid all remonftrance, up- 
 braiding, or difcuflion on the fubjed:, 
 having obferved that wounded vanity, felf- 
 lovc, and the fpirit of contradiction all 
 9 take
 
 EDWARD. 443 
 
 'take part on fuch oceafions againft the 
 remonftrator, and rather do harm than 
 good. Mifs Barnet certainly had no vio- 
 lent paffion for Sir George Royfton ; but 
 who knows what abufing him, blaming her 
 for having ever fpoken to him, ordering 
 her never to fpeak to him more, and fuch 
 irritating meafures, might have produced ? 
 And who has not known inftances of the 
 cooling embers of languid love being kept 
 glowing, and at length kindled into a flame, 
 by, furious attempts to extinguifh them? 
 Every thing of that nature Mrs. Barnet 
 avoided with the utmoft care, and ufed 
 every means in her power to render home 
 agreeable to her daughter, and for that pur- 
 pofe fhe feemed to place full confidence in. 
 her, and to be perfectly fatisfied with her 
 conduct. She obferved with concern, how- 
 ever, that the young Lady herfelf took little 
 intereft in the objects around her, was no 
 way entertained with the company which 
 {he either met at her father's, or with thofe 
 (lie vifjted in the neighbourhood ; that fhe 
 
 had
 
 444 E D \V A R D, 
 
 had no tafte for {he amufements of th 
 
 country, and that, contrary to her natural 
 
 turn, {he feemed fometimes penfive or ab- 
 
 fent in the midft of company. Difturbed 
 
 by thofe appearances in her daughter, Mrs. 
 
 Barnet began to fear that in the ftillnefs and 
 
 uniformity of rural life the young Lady's 
 
 jnind might be directed to her late pretended 
 
 lover, who {he imagined had a ftronger 
 
 hold of her affedions than was really the 
 
 cafe, and who might endeavour to renew a 
 
 correfpondence with her. Mrs. and Mifs 
 
 Eafy were at this time at Barnet-hall ; they 
 
 had come in confequence of a very preffing 
 
 letter written by Mrs. Barnet on the day 
 
 that fhe let out for her daughter. She had 
 
 done this with a view of rendering home 
 
 the more agreeable to the young Lady. 
 
 But they had been at Barnet-hall only a 
 
 few days when Mr. Barnet was feized with 
 
 a fevere fit of the gout, an accident which 
 
 never failed to render the houfe intolerable 
 
 to ftrangers, and extremely difagreeable to 
 
 thofe whom duty obliged to remain in it. 
 
 In
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 In this fituation of tilings, Mrs. Bar'net 
 agreed to Mrs. Eafy's rcqueft, that Mifsr 
 Barnet fhould accompany Mrs. and Mifs 
 Eafy to London^ in the hopes that their 
 fociety and the amufements of the -capital 
 would produce that effect on the former, 
 which the prefent circumftances of her own 
 family rendered improbable in the country. 
 And fhe was the more anxious to obtain 
 her hufband's confent that her daughter 
 fhould accompany Mrs. and Mifs Eafy to 
 London, and remain fome time there, be- 
 caufe fhe had received information that Sir 
 George Royfton had gone to Aix la 
 Chapelle. 
 
 He had taken this ffep in confequence 
 of fome very interefting intelligence from 
 London. One of his principal creditors had 
 intended to have him arrefted, but had poft- 
 poned that meafure on being affured that 
 he was on the point of being married to a 
 rich heirefs. On afterwards hearing that 
 the heirefs had changed her mind, the cre- 
 ditor refumcd his former intentions. An 
 
 acquaint-
 
 446 E D W A R D. 
 
 acquaintance of Sir George ferit him notice 
 of this by expreis. The Baronet left the 
 place leveral hours before- the creditor 
 reached it, and in fpite of the diligence 
 ufed by thofe who continued in puriuit of 
 him, Sir George got clear out of the king- 
 dom, and arrived fafely at Aix la Chapelle, 
 which exafperated the creditor fq highly, 
 that he perfevered during feveral, hours in 
 pouring curfes on all governments without 
 diftindion which protected debtors from 
 being feized wherever they could be found, 
 and dragged home to their native prilbns. 
 
 This man's intemperance admits of forne 
 cxcufe on account of the money he loll ; 
 but the oppofite opinions entertained by 
 the company at this place on the prcfent 
 occafion are more furprifing, and ferve to 
 illuftrate the common obfervation, that 
 people's opinions in general are derived 
 from their own particular fituation, more 
 than from the real merits of any difputable 
 point. 
 
 Sir George Royflon's adventure with 
 Louifa Barnct was the prevailing topic of 
 
 conver-
 
 EDWARD. 447 
 
 converfation at the Wells for fome time. 
 The fathers and mothers, particularly thofe 
 wh prown up daughters, exclaimed 
 
 agairift him. as a needy fortune-hunter, of 
 courfe a villain of the firft magnitude. 
 
 Sir George's creditors in general, form- 
 ing a conquerable portion of the permanent 
 inhabitants, cenfured Mifs Barnet as a co- 
 quet and a jilt for not having gone off with 
 him to Scotland to be married, as by 
 her inconftancy many honeft induftrious 
 tradefmen would run the rifk of lofmg the 
 money he owed them. 
 
 A genteel young man from Ireland, who 
 was paying his court to a woman of confi- 
 derable fortune, obferved, in a private com- 
 pany where this affair was warmly difcuffed, 
 " that he was forry to give an opinion agaipft 
 a Lady, but certainly Mifs Barnet had acted 
 with infmcerity ; becaufe it appeared that fhe 
 had no intention of marrying Sir George, but 
 that her view was merely to induce him to 
 lofe his time in paying his court to her in 
 preference to others, with whom he might 
 have fucceeded j whereas Sir George had 
 behaved with fmcerity, was ready to have 
 
 carried
 
 44-S E D W A R D. 
 
 carried her off, and married her like a ma~ti 
 of honour.'* 
 
 A Lady who had been an heirefsj on 
 whofe countenance there was a deep im- 
 preffion of melancholy, who lived feparate 
 from her hufband on a moderate allowance 
 out of her c wn fortune, anfwered, "Had 
 Sir Gerrge Royfton behaved with the fm- 
 cerity of a man of ftrict honour, Sir, he 
 would have informed Mifs Barnet that he 
 was overwhelmed with debt; that his mo- 
 tive in propofing marriage to her was not 
 love, but to repair his own fortune from 
 the ruin of hers : but as he made no men- 
 tion of thefe truths, and would probably 
 have treated her cruelly, had fhe become 
 his wife, there is no room to praife his fin- 
 cerity or honour." 
 
 Having pronounced this in fomewhat of 
 a broken voice, the Lady rofe from her feat, 
 and walked towards the window,, wiping 
 her eyes with her handkerchief. 
 
 When Mrs. Barnet was certain that Sir 
 George Royfton had been obliged to go to 
 the Continent, and faw her hufband confined 
 with the gout, me became not only willing 
 
 but
 
 EDWARD. 449 
 
 but even felicitous, that Louifa fhould go to 
 London with Mrs. and Mifs Eafy ; but fhe 
 found a good deal of difficulty to prevail on 
 Mr. Barnet to confent. 
 
 Nothing could be more-oppofite than the 
 fentiments of the hufband and wife on this 
 head. Mrs. Barnet wifhed that her daugh- 
 ter fhould go to London, becaufe fhe well 
 knew, that when her hufband was ill of the 
 gout, there would be no amufement and 
 little comfort at Barnet-Hall. Whatever 
 was agreeable in Mrs. Barnet' s lot, and 
 whatever fource of happinefs fhe had in her 
 power, fhe was defirous of partaking with 
 her friends ; and if fhe had had the diftri- 
 bution of enjoyment, the largeft portion 
 would have been dealt among them. 
 
 Mr. Barnet, 'on the contrary, wifhed his 
 daughter to remain for the very reafon his 
 wife defired her away ; becaufe home was to 
 be the abode of difquiet. With fome peculiar 
 marks of chara&er, Mr. Barnet had one in 
 common with a great many of mankind ; 
 but it is to be hoped, that few poflefs it in fo 
 eminent a degree ; and of thofe few it were 
 
 VOL. i. GO much
 
 E D W A R D, 
 
 much to be wifhed that none were to be 
 found in the very higheft ranks of life, for 
 there fuch a difpofition is a much greater 
 evil than it can be in the middle or inferior 
 ranks of fociety. The peculiarity alluded 
 to is this, that while he gave himfelf little 
 or no concern about the diftrefles of 
 any of the human race, he would have 
 thought the whole human race well em- 
 ployed in relieving his ; and if any of 
 his acquaintance feemed to enjoy eafe or 
 comfort, when be laboured under ficknefs 
 or pain, he dated it as a clear fign of a 
 felfifh and unfeeling difpofition. This being 
 Mr. Barnet's way of thinking, nothing can 
 be a ftronger proof of his wife's addrefs, 
 and the influence me had with him, than 
 his confenting that his daughter mould go 
 to London at the particular period when 
 her refidence in the country would have 
 been moft agreeable to him. As foon as 
 Mrs. and Mifs Eafy iet out for the capital 
 with their young friend, Mrs. Barnet invited l; 
 Edward to the country, in the hopes that 
 his converfation would be fome compenfa- 
 13 tion
 
 EDWARD. 451 
 
 tion to her hufband for the ab fence of her 
 daughter. Her expectation was not difap- 
 pointed ; Edward became every day more 
 agreeable to Barnet, and a remiflion of his 
 pain happening foon after, he imputed it 
 entirely to the pleafure he derived from the 
 youth's company, to the great mortification 
 of the apothecary, who infifted that it was 
 the effect of one of his draughts, which 
 Mr. Barnet had vomited up two hours be- 
 fore the pain remitted. 
 
 Edward's manners were irre ; fiftibly en- 
 gaging, and his converfation of that happy- 
 nature that gains good-will to the fpeaker, 
 while it diffufes good-humour through the 
 company. One unfortunate effect flowed 
 from this, Mr. Barnet was more peevifh 
 than ufual as often as Edward was out 
 of his fight. The young man himfelf, 
 however, was impatient to return to thofe 
 ftudies on which his hopes of independency 
 were founded; he languifhed to indulge, from 
 funds of his own acquiring, that continual 
 propenfity which her felt to acts of benevo- 
 lence and liberality ; he was Hkewife -eager 
 
 G G 2 tO
 
 452 EDWARD. 
 
 to lighten the burden of obligation, the only 
 burden of which he could have wifhed him- 
 felf relieved, for the exprefs purpoie of 
 laying it upon others. 
 
 Having obferved, however, that the mod 
 remote hint of his going to town was al- 
 ways received with ill- humour by Mr. 
 Barnet, Edward was entirely filent on that 
 head j but when Mrs. Barnet faw her huf- 
 band confiderably better, fhe deiired Mr. 
 Temple to introduce the fubjecl, that Ihe 
 might endeavour to convince her hufband 
 of the expediency of Edward's returning to 
 London. One day after dinner, therefore, Mr. 
 Temple took occafion to obferve, that the 
 Courts were then fitting, and looking to Ed- 
 ward, " Is it not time," faid he, " young man, 
 for you to refume the weighty ftudies of the 
 law?" 
 
 " Curfe the law !" cried Barnet, throwing 
 on the table the very nectarine he was going 
 to bite. 
 
 The company, who perceived that this 
 burft of anger entirely proceeded from Mr. 
 Barnet' s diflike to the idea of the youth's 
 leaving them, joined in a laugh ; after 
 
 which,
 
 E D W A R D. 453 
 
 which, Mr. Temple faid, " I hope, my 
 dear brother, for your fake more than mine, 
 that your malediction is not directed againft 
 the gofpcl as well as the law ; at any rate 
 you ought to confider that Edward has been 
 here a month." 
 
 " A month !" crie-d Barnet; <{ he has not 
 been here above a week." 
 
 " It is fortunate for him," refumed Mr. 
 Temple, " that he can make a month feem a 
 week ; but you may rely upon it, that he 
 has been here juft three and thirty days." 
 
 " Well, well, it does not fignify," faid Mr. 
 Barnet, peeviihly ; " if it were three and 
 forty, he fhall not leave us yet." 
 
 Nobody could be more convinced than 
 Mrs. Barnet of the expediency of Edward's 
 going to London ; but fhe knew at the 
 fame time that the moft likely way to make- 
 her hufband obftinate to retain him in thf 
 Country was to infift at that moment on the 
 propriety of his going to town ; fhe there- 
 fore changed the fubject, and, fome time 
 after, the converfation turning on the dan- 
 gers to which young men are expofed at 
 G o 3 their
 
 454 E D W A R D. 
 
 their firft arrival in the capital, ihe hap- 
 pened to remark, that it xvas fortunate for 
 them when they were connected with peo- 
 ple who were wifer and more experienced 
 than themfelves, to give them counfel and 
 advice. No more pafled at that time, and 
 the company feparated. 
 
 Mrs. Barnet afterwards feized a favour- 
 able moment for refuming the fubjec~r, and 
 at laft was fortunate enough to perfuade her 
 hufband, that Edward ought to go to Lon- 
 don very foon ; but what {he had accident- 
 ally dro'pped on the fubject of armjng a 
 young man with good advice made an im- 
 preflion on her huiband that fhe did not 
 expect, and prompted him to an exertion- 
 which (he certainly never intended he mould 
 make.
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 CHAP. XLIV, 
 
 J>Je faut il que deliberer ? 
 La Cour en Confeillers foifonne. 
 Eft-il befoin d'executer ? 
 L'on ne rencontre perfonne. 
 
 DE LA FONTAINE. 
 
 R* Barnet being fufficiently recovered 
 to bear an airing in the carriage, he 
 defired Edward to accompany him j and 
 when they came to a part where the road 
 was uncommonly fmooth and level for fe- 
 veral miles, he fpoke to the following effecT: : 
 *' My dear Edward, after mature and deep 
 reflection, I have at length come to the 
 opinion, that it will not be for your advan- 
 tage to remain longer in the country at pre- 
 ient ; but that you ought to fet out for Lon- 
 don to-morrow morning. You may re- 
 member that my wife mentioned the need 
 which young men, ignorant of the world 
 GG 4 like
 
 45 6 E D W A R D. 
 
 like yourfelf, have of good counfel, particu-s- 
 larly when they refide in fuch a place as 
 London. Mrs. Barnet does not want for 
 fagacity, as far as her underftanding reaches ; 
 but as that cannot go far on account of the 
 weaknefs of her fex, me threw it out as 
 a hint to me, being confcious that (he 
 herfelf is incapable of executing fuch a 
 tafk. Accordingly I {hall take this op- 
 portunity, when there is nobody prefent ex- 
 cept ourfelves, to arm you with fome ufeful 
 rules for the better regulation of your future 
 conduct. Firft and foremen: then, I advife 
 you to make yourfelf matter of your bufi- 
 nefs as foon as poffible ; for I once heard 
 an eminent attorney declare, that, in your 
 profeffion, lofs of time is lofs of money. 
 
 " In London you will fometimes meet 
 "with people who prefer pleafure tobufmefs : 
 but I counfel you to prefer bufmefs to plea- 
 fure j becaufe, although pleafure is by much 
 the moft agreeable in the mean time, yet 
 I have been told by fome who have made 
 the experiment, that bufmefs affords mod 
 
 fatisfa&ion on reflexion. 
 
 "Ic
 
 E D W A R D. 457 
 
 tf It is ufual for young lawyers to di- 
 rect their attention to a knowledge of 
 the practise cf fome particular court, 
 with a view to diftinguiih themfelves in 
 it ; but I advife you to acquire a tho? 
 rough knowledge of the practice of all the 
 courts without exception, that you may 
 have as much bufmefs as you pleafe in 
 each, and then you may adhere to that 
 which you find the mcfi profitable. Elo- 
 quence, you may depend upon it, is of con- 
 fiderable ufe in the exercife of your pro- 
 feffion ; I recommend it to you, therefore, 
 to excel all your cotemporaries in that ar- 
 ticle. Judgment and good fenfe are alfo of 
 fervice to thofe who pratife the law, and 
 you have been remarked for putting a great 
 deal of meaning in a few words. I remem- 
 ber to have heard Mr. Temple aflert, that 
 in a few obfervations which you made one 
 day after dinner at my table, there was 
 more fenfe arid meaning than in all that 
 fell from Sir Mathew Maukifh, who made 
 an harangue on the fame fubject that Lifted 
 an hour. I muft inform you, however, 
 15 that
 
 458 EDWARD. 
 
 that Mr. Wormwood remarked at the fame 
 time, that although condenfing a great deal 
 of matter in a few words is admired on 
 fome occafions, yet, in law, it is thought 
 more beneficial to involve a fmall quantity 
 of meaning in a profufion of words; this 
 kind of eloquence, he aflured me, was 
 greatly in vogue, not only in law-papers, but 
 likewife at the bar. He mentioned alfo fome 
 other places, where the fame fpecies of ora- 
 tory gains ground daily. It will there- 
 fore be proper that you pay fome attention 
 to acquire an art fo much in famion. I 
 forbear to mention thofe other places, be- 
 caufe I do not wilh to give offence to either 
 Houfe of Parliament, and far lefs to the 
 church, being firmly attached both to church 
 and king, although I never go either to 
 church or court, not from want of refpec~t,but 
 merely becaufe I find them both extremely 
 tirefome. I beg, however, that you will not 
 mention what I have faid, regarding the elo- 
 quence of the parliament and pulpit, to our 
 neighbour Sir Mathew Maukifh, becaufe he 
 would naturally think I meant a wipe at his 
 
 parlia-
 
 EDWARD. 459 
 
 parliamentary fpeeches. You will alfo con- 
 ceal what I have faid from my brother Tem- 
 ple, who cannot bear that any thing Ihould be 
 infinuated againft the eloquence of thepulpit. 
 
 " Women, my dear Edward, have been 
 always confidered as very dangerous crea- 
 tures for young men : As there is the greateft 
 collection of them in the capital, London, 
 of courfe, is thought the moft dangerous 
 place in England for an inexperienced 
 youth. Perhaps you may think that you 
 cannot properly be fo called, having had 
 fome experience of the women of the coun- 
 try ; but I muft inform you, that they are, 
 in fome refpeds, different froi the women 
 of the town ; fo that you ought not en- 
 tirely to form your notions of the one, from, 
 your knowledge of the other : in this you 
 are in danger alfo of being milled by the 
 denomination fometimes given to the latter^ 
 who are vulgarly called women of pleafure, 
 although they, not unfrequently, turn out 
 to be women of pain. 
 
 " You ought to avoid bad habits of every 
 kind, becaufe habit when indulged becomes 
 
 a fecond
 
 E D:\V A R D. 
 
 a fecond nature, and requires very great 
 frrengthof mind to overcome. This degree of 
 philofophy and flrength of mind, 'however, 
 I myfelf have exercifed, for I acknowledge 
 that in my youthful years I was a little given 
 to wcrnen, yet, notwithftanding the power 
 of habit, I have now, by dint of realbn and 
 refleclion, almoil entirely got the better of 
 that dangerous propenfity, I mention thi$ 
 for your encouragemeht. 
 
 " It may be proper alfo to mention, that 
 homely women are the leaft dangerous ; 
 when you are obliged therefore to be in 
 female fociety, you had bed attach yoarfelf 
 to that clafs kiflead of the handfome, who 
 are more apt to lead young men aftray, to 
 the ruin of their reputation, and, which is 
 wprfe, even to the injury of their health. This 
 is not only my opinion, but it \vas that of 
 Solomon, the wifeft man that ever lived ; 
 who gave many excellent rules againft the 
 allurements of beautiful and wanton women. 
 But it muft be acknowledged, that his wif- 
 dom appears more confpicuo>-'s in his precepts 
 than in the- manner ia which he himfelf 
 
 obferved
 
 EDWARD. 461. 
 
 obferved them ; from which it is evident 
 that we ought to obferve his precepts and 
 not follow his example. I could add fome 
 ether ufeful inftrucTions, but being of 
 opinion that it is better to make but mode- 
 rate exactions of young people with a great 
 probability of their being fulfilled, than by 
 requiring a great deal to run the rifk of 
 fome being neglected, 1 fhall terminate my 
 admonitions here." 
 
 As Mr. Barnet ended this difcourfe, which 
 had been prepared with' more previous re- 
 flection than any he had ever before made, 
 a gentleman of the neighbourhood rode up 
 to the carriage with the ufual inquiry about 
 the health of his family. This interruption 
 was very agreeable to Edward, who kept the 
 moft profound filence while Mr. Barnet. 
 fpoke, and would have been much at a lofs 
 what anfwer to have made; for however 
 ridiculous the admonitions appeared, and 
 notwithstanding his having a natural talent 
 for feizing the ridiculous in whatever he , 
 heard or obferved, he never would permit 
 himfelf to. indulge in- a (ingle expreffion at 
 
 the
 
 46z EDWARD. 
 
 the expence of Mr. Barnet; the fame ab- 
 furdities which would have entertained him 
 in another, always gave him pain when they 
 came from him. 
 
 Edward fet out for London the following 
 merning as had heen determined, and took 
 poffeffion of his chambers in the Temple.
 
 EDWARD. 463 
 
 CHAP. XLV. 
 
 O life ! how pleafing is thy morning, 
 Young Fancy's rays the hills adorning ! 
 Cold paufing Caution's leiTons {corning, 
 
 We frifk away, 
 Like fchool-boys, at th6 expefted warning, 
 
 To joy and play. 
 
 We wander there, we wander here, 
 We eye the rofe upon the brier, 
 Unmindful that the thorn is near 
 
 Among the leaves ; 
 And though the puny wound appear, 
 
 Short while it grieves. 
 
 BURKS, 
 
 ss Louifa Barnet was rather below the 
 middle fize of women, her perfon well 
 proportioned and elaftic, her hair dark 
 brown, in great profufion, and arranged with 
 the attention requifite to give it the grace- 
 ful flow of negligence, her complexion 
 tending to brown; {he had fine teeth, and 
 
 black
 
 464 D W A R D. 
 
 black eyes of an uncommon vivacity, her 
 other features were not unexceptionable j 
 yet in many men's opinionj fhe was on the 
 whole, more attractive than fome beauties 
 of high renown, whofe countenances and 
 perfons were generally pronounced more 
 regular and perfect. Mifs Barnet was fond 
 of admiration, not only from thofe whofe 
 judgment fhe valued, but alfo from thofe 
 whofe opinion, in other matters, fhe dif- 
 regarded. Her prejudices, whether againft 
 or in favour of any perfon, were more 
 violent than lading ; the impreflions made 
 on her mind, however ftrong they feemed 
 to be, required the prefence- and affiduities 
 of the perfon who made them, to prevent 
 their being effaced. She had never hi- 
 therto feen any man who had much in- 
 terefted her, when fhe met Mr. Clifton, 
 at a very numerous afTembly to which 
 fhe accompanied Mrs. and Mifs Eafy. ' 
 Mifs Barnet had feen him but feldcm, 
 fince he left the Univerfity. This young 
 man's connections, hjs fortune, the elegance 
 
 of
 
 E D W A R,- D. 465 
 
 of his perfon and manners, his difpofi- 
 tion to gallantry, and above all, the par- 
 tiality which fome Ladies of diftinguifhed 
 rank and beauty had {hewn him, gave him 
 a degree of importance in the fafhionable 
 circles, feldoin attained at his age. His 
 mother, Lady Ann Clifton, had been 
 brought up in the centre of fafhion, had 
 remained in it during her hufband's life, 
 and refumed her place at a decent interval 
 after his death. She had poflefled a great 
 fhare of beauty, the duration of which had 
 been much abridged by a town life. Her 
 form was ftill elegant, and her manners 
 highly obliging and agreeable. She had 
 refufed feveral propofals for a fecond mar- 
 riage, which by the world in general 
 would have been thought advantageous : 
 whether thefe refufals proceeded from a 
 perfonal diflike to the parties, or from a 
 formed refolutlon againft a fecond mar- 
 riage, is uncertain. She was exceffively 
 fond of her fon, and as vain of his ac- 
 complimments, as at an earlier period of 
 her life, me had been of her own beauty ; 
 VOL, i. H H {he
 
 466 E D \V A R D. 
 
 {he was accufed of 'being pleafed even with 
 his fuccefs in gallantry, particularly with 
 his attachment to Lady Hornbury, a 
 woman of diftinguifhed beauty, whofe 
 hufband was not fo delicate refpeding his 
 wife's chaftity, as Julius Caefar is faid to 
 have been ; for his Lordfhip continued to 
 live with her, notwithftanding the fufpi- 
 cions that prevailed againft it. Lady Ann 
 Clifton was the lefs uneafy on account of 
 her Ton's connection with Lady Hornbury, 
 becaufe fhe imagined it diverted him from 
 amours more injurious to his own health, 
 or which might have proved more ruinous 
 to others. Lady Ann's free manner of 
 thinking on fuch fubjeds was thought the 
 more extraordinary, becaufe her own cha- 
 racter was unimpeached in that eflential 
 article. Mifs Barnet was ftruck with the 
 improvement in Mr. Clifton's manner and 
 whole appearance, fmce (he had laft feen 
 him; he alfo derived confequence in her 
 eflimation, from the whifper of approbation 
 that followed him through the room, and 
 by perceiving that feveral young ladies 
 
 could
 
 EDWARD. 467 
 
 could not conceal their fatisfadion while he 
 continued to converfe with them, nor their 
 uneafmefs when he quitted them to addrefs 
 another. She was particularly ftruck by 
 what fhe overheard Lady Townly remark 
 to a Lady fitting next her, pointing to 
 Clifton ; " That young fellow is one of the 
 moft dangerous rakes in England ; he has 
 already turned the heads of feveral women 
 of rank, and gives more uneafmefs to huf- 
 bands than half the profligates about town." 
 While Mifs Barnet was meditating on this 
 eulogium, fhe was addrefled by Mr. Worm- 
 wood ; but the ufual compliments which 
 pafled between them, did not prevent her 
 from obferving that Clifton continued 
 longer than ufual fpeaking to one Lady, 
 whofe drefs made rather a more liberal 
 difplay of her charms, than the fafhion 
 permitted. A Gentleman at that moment 
 tapping Wormwood on the fhoulder, in- 
 quired who the gay Lady was who had 
 hold of young Clifton. 
 
 H H 2 That
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 " That gay Lady," replied Wormwood, 
 in his farcaftic ftile, " is the celebrated 
 Mrs. Dafh, a beauty of ten years ftanding ; 
 ihe feems to dread that the artillery of her 
 eyes begin to flacken fire and lofe their ef- 
 fect, which has determined her to open a 
 mafked battery, that, as you fee, draws 
 general attention, and I am told has 
 grievoufly wounded the Earl of Hornbury. 
 I wonder where his Lordfhip is at this 
 inftant ; for he is fo jealous, that he cannot 
 bear to fee any man fpeak to Mrs. Dafh, 
 and would be mad were he to know with 
 what fatisfadtion fhe liftens to Clifton." 
 
 " Lord Hornbury," replied the Gentle- 
 man, " is the laft man in England I 
 fhould have fufpected of being jealous, 
 particularly of Mr. Clifton." 
 
 " Why fo ?" faid Wormwood. 
 
 " Becaufe," anfwered the other, " Clif- 
 ton's attachment to his own Lady feems 
 to give his Lordfhip no manner of unea*- 
 fmefs." 
 
 " That is true enough," rejoined Worm- 
 wood; " but it' would feem, that my Lord 
 14 has
 
 EDWARD. 469 
 
 has been fo long aecuftomed to her 
 Lady/hip's ivay^ that he can bear any 
 thing from her-, whereas Mrs. Dafh is a 
 new flame; he wifhes her to be confidered 
 as his mtftrefs) and there are men fo very 
 delicate, that they cannot endure to be 
 cuckolded by any woman except their own 
 wives: but here comes her Ladyfliip ; you 
 will prefently fee her draw Clifton from 
 Mrs. Dafh, and like a complaifant wife, 
 leave that Lady open to the addrefles of his 
 Lordfhip, in cafe he fhould arrive." 
 
 During this dialogue, Mifs Barnet feemed 
 to be occupied with fomething elfe, but in 
 reality fhe had liftened to it with attention ; 
 {he obferved that Lady Hornbury had no 
 fooner caught fight of Clifton, than he 
 left Mrs. Dafh and haftened to her Lady- 
 fliip. Lady Hornbury had preferved her 
 beauty longer than moft women, but had 
 not been fo fortunate with refpedt to her 
 reputation; perhaps the perfevering eclat 
 of the firft was one caufe that the fecond 
 was attacked with peculiar feverity by fome 
 of her own fex. 
 
 HH 3 The
 
 470 EDWARD. 
 
 The town had given her a pretty nume- 
 rous fucceflion of lovers ; all of whom, as 
 was generally aflerted, had reafon to com- 
 plain of her inconftancy, but few of her 
 cruelty ; the moft malicious, indeed, made 
 no fcruple of declaring, that fhe had made 
 them all happy in their turn ; but as 
 this was never legally afcertained, her 
 Ladyfhip maintained her fituation in fo- 
 ciety as ufual. Her general reception, in 
 what they called the beft aflemblies, gave 
 much offence to fome fcrupulous females, 
 who infifted, that there was as ftrong 
 ground for excluding her, as thofe women 
 whofe delinquency was made manifeft in a 
 public court ; becaufe, added they, " What 
 every body fays mnjl be true" 
 
 To this however it was anfwered, that the 
 preceding maxim, although often repeated 
 in converfation, had not as yet been adopt- 
 ed in law, and that as falfehood, cheating 
 at cards, calumny, and ingratitude, even 
 when detected, did not exclude the guilty 
 from the aflemblies in queftion, it might 
 feem unjuft to punifh with fuch feverity, 
 
 upon
 
 EDWARD. 471 
 
 upon mere fufpicion, a crime lefs heinous 
 in itfelf, and to which there is more 
 temptation. 
 
 That there is more temptation was paf- 
 fionately denied by the moft violent of 
 thofe, who moved the Bill of Exclufion. It 
 would be difficult perhaps to afcertain this 
 point with accuracy; but it was generally 
 believed, that thofe who were the moft 
 violent and inexorable againft Lady Horn- 
 bury, were fully as much offended at her 
 beauty, as with her conduct. Mils Barnet 
 was infpired with a defire to engage Clif- 
 ton's attention, which me had never felt 
 before, and which probably me would not 
 have felt now, had it not been for the 
 formidable account me had juft heard of 
 him, and the univerfal wifh me perceived 
 among the Ladies to be noticed by him ; 
 fhe had befides fome inclination to vex 
 and triumph over Lady Hornbury, who, 
 (he imagined, had behaved to her with 
 haughtinefs. Mifs Barnet was no wife 
 intimidated in her defigns on the heart 
 of Clifton, by the charms of her Ladyfhip, 
 H H 4 which
 
 472 E D W A R D. 
 
 which having the difadvantage of being 
 older, could harldly be thought equal, and 
 were in Louifa's opinion far inferior to 
 thofe fhe beheld every morning in her 
 looking-glafs. 
 
 Mr. Clifton, as (he had for fome time 
 been expecting, accofted her, with the ufual 
 inquiries refpecting her family, which lead- 
 ing into other converfation, he was more 
 flruck than he had ever been with the 
 fprightlinefs of her obfervations. Few wo- 
 men could be more agreeable than Mifs 
 Barnet when fhe pleafed, and fhe never 
 had been more difpofed to feem fo than at 
 prefent ; there was a vein of farcafm in 
 her remarks, and a familiarity in her man- 
 ner, which her mother had ftrove in vain 
 to correct ; but as her obfervations were as 
 lively as they were fevere, and above all 
 as fhe was very handfome, her converfa- 
 tion was pleafmg to the men; the laft cir- 
 cumftance, however, did not render her 
 more agreeable to the women in general, 
 and feveral Ladies in the company began 
 to think her converfation with Clifton con- 
 tinued
 
 EDWARD. 473 
 
 tinned too long. This was not the opinion 
 of the parties themfelves ; they became 
 every inftant more agreeable to each other, 
 when a Gentleman fent by LadyHornbury 
 informed Mr. Clifton that her Ladylhip 
 expeded him to make up her party at 
 cards. 
 
 Mr. Clifton having bowed to the Gen- 
 tleman, refumed his difcourfe with Mifs 
 Barnet. 
 
 " Did you not hear the fummons ?'* 
 faid fhe. 
 
 " Yes," replied he, " but there is time 
 enough." 
 
 " I fear her Ladyfhip will be impatient," 
 refumed Mifs Barnet. 
 
 " I do not know how that may be," faid 
 Clifton, " but I plainly fee you are impa- 
 tient that I fhould leave you." 
 
 " I am certainly," replied Mifs Barnet, 
 '* becaufe I know that nothing would ren- 
 der you fo miferable as any mifunder- 
 ftanding with her Ladyfhip. " 
 
 "May
 
 474 EDWARD. 
 
 " May I afk, if you intend being at the 
 Opera to-morrow evening?" faid Mr. 
 Clifton. 
 
 Mifs Barnet. I believe Mrs. Eafy intends 
 to go ; if fo I fhall accompany her. 
 
 Clifton. I hope I fhall find room in 
 her box. 
 
 Mifs Barnet. As for room, I dare fwear 
 there will be abundance, but the box has 
 one inconvenience 
 
 Clifton. You do not hear the fmging 
 perfectly ? 
 
 Mifs Barnet. Pardon me, we hear very 
 well. 
 
 Clifton. You do not fee the dancing 
 diftinftly ? 
 
 Mifs Barnet. O ! very distinctly, no box 
 can be better placed for feeing ; but it is 
 inconveniently fituated. 
 
 Clifton. I cannot conceive how a box 
 at the Opera can be ill fituated, in which 
 you both hear and fee perfectly. 
 
 Mifs Barnet. Can you not conceive that 
 people may go to the Opera more for 
 
 the
 
 EDWARD. 475 
 
 the purpofe of being feen, than for either 
 feeing or hearing ? 
 
 Clifton. I had forgot that. 
 
 Mifs Barnet. Nay, I only mentioned 
 it to fhew you, that a thing might exift 
 which you could not conceive ; but as for 
 Mrs. Eafy's box, the inconveniency I al- 
 luded to is, that in it people are as diftincl;- 
 ly feen as they fee, which you will con- 
 fider, no doubt, as an unfortunate cir- 
 cumftance. 
 
 Clifton. Howfo? 
 
 Mifs Barnet* Why, it is diredly oppofite 
 to that of theCountefs of Hornbury's. 
 
 Clifton (laughing). In fpite of that alarm- 
 ing circumftance, with your permiffion, I'll 
 venture into it to-morrow night. 
 
 Mifs Bar net. You are a bold man ; but 
 in the mean time, pray obey her Ladyfhip's 
 fummons, for do you fee my Lord has juft 
 come, and might take it amifs that you 
 ftiould keep his wife waiting, unlefs added 
 {he, with a fly look, and then flopped. 
 
 Clifton. Unlefs what? 
 
 Mifs
 
 476 EDWARD. 
 
 Mtfs Barnef. Unlefs you expect that he 
 will pardon your neglect of his wife in con- 
 fideration of the attentions you feem willing 
 to beftow on Mrs, Dam. 
 
 Clifton. Where did you pick up all this 
 fcandal ? 
 
 Mifs Barnet. All over the town. We 
 made a vaft number of vifits of late but 
 pray be gone; here comes a fecond meflage; 
 her Lady {hip's eyes dart lightning, and we 
 may have thunder, if you do not make off 
 direaiy. 
 
 Clifton anfwered her only by a fmile, and 
 then joined Lady Hornbury's party. He 
 loft his money, and fpoke little. 
 
 " It might have been imagined," faid 
 Lady Hornbury, " that the lofs of your 
 money affected your fpirits, had you been 
 in high fpirits when you began to play." 
 
 " It is not eafy to appear in high fpirits 
 with a head-ach," faid Clifton ; and foon 
 after, on pretence that his head-ach in- 
 creafed, he left the aflembly. 
 
 Contrary to his ufual cuftom, Mr, Clifton 
 was at the Opera the following evening be* 
 
 fore
 
 EDWARD. 477 
 
 fore the curtain was drawn up ; he went 
 to Mrs. Eafy's box, as foon as he faw 
 her arrive with her daughter and Mifs 
 Barnet. After paying his compliments to 
 them, fome other acquaintance of Mrs. 
 and Mifs Eafy entered the box, and 
 while they entertained her and her daugh- 
 ter, Clifton converfed with Mifs Barnet. 
 She was relating fomething to him, when 
 fuddenly flopping in the middle of the 
 narrative, flie faid, " You fhall hear the 
 reft another time, but you muft be gone 
 now ! " 
 
 Clifton. Why, what is the matter ? 
 
 Mifs Barnet. Do you not fee Lady 
 ? 
 
 Clifton. Pray continue. 
 
 Mifs Barnet. Heaven forbid that my un- 
 lucky ftory fhould detain you a moment ! 
 
 Clifton. I beg you will go on. 
 
 Mifs Barnet. What ! with the crime of 
 yefterday unexpiated but, perhaps you 
 have feen her Ladyfhip this morning, and 
 have already obtained her pardon ? 
 
 Clifton. I beg you will proceed. 
 
 Mifs
 
 478 E D W A R D. 
 
 Mifs Bamet. You have been with her 
 then ? I muft be fatisfied in this point. 
 
 Clifton. I have not feen^her Ladyfhip 
 fmce laft night. 
 
 Mifs Barnet. Monftrous ! but look, her 
 eye has caught you 5 why don't you haften 
 to her ? 
 
 Clifton. Becaufe, if you will allow me, 
 I would rather flay where I am. 
 
 Mifs Barnet. Nay, it is out of tendernefs 
 for you that I am anxious for your going ; 
 only behold how angry {he feems Pray be 
 gone. 
 
 Clifton. I will not flir until you have 
 finifhed your ftory. 
 
 Mifs Barnet. Have a care what you fay ; 
 I can, if I pleafe, fpin out a ftory like the 
 Sultanefs in the Arabian Nights Entertain- 
 ment. 
 
 Clifton. Spin away then, O beauteous 
 Scherazade ! I am all attention. 
 
 Mifs Barnet. Since it is your pleafqre, 
 moft mighty Father of the Faithful, I will 
 proceed, though confcious that the tale is 
 all unworthy of the fublime highnefs of 
 
 your Majefty's ears. 
 
 Here
 
 EDWARD. 479 
 
 Here Clifton burft into a violent fit of 
 laughter, in which he was accompanied by 
 Mifs Barnet and Mifs Eafy. The exceffive 
 gaiety which prevailed in Mrs. Eafy's box, 
 through the whole evening, feemed to throw 
 a gloom on that immediately oppofite to it ; 
 and Lady Hornbury's ill-humour was ap- 
 parent to all prefent. 
 
 Mr. Clifton remained to the end of the 
 opera, and did not quit Mrs. Eafy until he 
 handed her, her daughter, and Mifs Barnet, 
 into the carriage ; fo that the triumph of the 
 latter over Lady Hornbury was complete. 
 
 The fatisfaclion which Mifs Barnet de- 
 rived from this triumph, with theincreafing 
 partiality fhe felt for Mr. Clifton, intoxi- 
 cated her fo much, that fhe did not fuffici- 
 ently weigh the nature and tendency of his 
 afliduities, nor the drift of his language, 
 which was gay, nattering, and gallant, in 
 the higheft degree, but kept entirely clear 
 of any hint of a nature, which alone could 
 have rendered it prudent or proper for the* 
 young Lady to have liftened to him in the 
 diftinguifhed manner flie did. Mifs Barnet 
 4 was
 
 480 E D W A R D. 
 
 was pleafed with Clifton's fprightlinefs, de- 
 lighted with the idea of mortifying Lady 
 Hornbury, and of engrofling the affiduities 
 of a man, whofe attentions were fo much 
 defired by the moft fafhionable of her fex 
 and acquaintance: charmed with the prefent 
 gratification of her vanity, future confe- 
 quences never diiturbed the gaiety of her 
 reflections.
 
 EDWARD. 481 
 
 CHAP. XLVI. 
 
 Ce qui fe trouve de moins dans la galanterie, c'eft de 
 1'amour. ROCHEFOUCAULT. 
 
 PEW young men are endowed with a ftea- 
 dinefs of judgment fufficient to fecure 
 them from the vanity which the attentions 
 and favours of beauty are fo apt to create : 
 it has been doubted whether Alcibiades de- 
 rived more pride from the victories he 
 gained over his enemies in the field, than 
 from thofe he obtained over the hearts of his 
 fair countrywomen. 
 
 The marked partiality with which Clifton 
 had been diftinguifhed by the women from 
 the time that he firft appeared in the circles 
 of fafhion, had already begun to fwell his 
 heart with a degree of pride and felf-import- 
 ance that did not naturally belong to it, 
 while the converfation and example of cer- 
 tain men of gallantry, of much longer 
 {landing than himfelf, inclined him to con- 
 
 VOL. I. II fider
 
 482 E D \V A R D. 
 
 fider the arts of fedudion pracYifed on wo- 
 ment as venial, in companion with any- 
 other fpecies of perfidy. 
 
 It has been already mentioned, that Lady 
 Ann Clifton viewed her fon's gallantries in a 
 lighter manner than they deferred. When 
 fhe underftood that he was fo often with 
 Mifs Earner, fhe laid to him, one day, " I 
 fhould be forry to think you had formed 
 any plan of playing the fool with that 
 girl ; if you have, 1 heartily hope that 
 flie will have the wit to efcape your fnares; 
 but I am ftill more folicitous that you 
 {hould efcape Uer's. Mifs Barnet is one of 
 the prettied brunetts I ever faw, and does 
 not want addrefs j the excellent character of 
 her mother has procured her the efteem of 
 all who know her ; but I could not bear to 
 be connected with that ridiculous man the 
 father ; and as I do not often play the moni- 
 tor, or interfere at all in your amufements, 
 I expect, my dear Jack, that you will fpare 
 me fuch a mortification, and give me full 
 aflurance, that you have no idea of marriage 
 
 in the prefent cafe." 
 
 To
 
 EDWARD. 483 
 
 To this remonftrance Clifton, in the mod 
 ferious manner, declared, that he had not ; 
 and then added, with a fmile, that if it 
 would give his mother any farther fati- 
 fadion, he would promife never to marry 
 in his life. 
 
 Lady Ann replied, " That, fo far from, 
 expe&ing any fuch promife, the greateft 
 happinefs to which me looked forward in 
 life was founded on the hope of feeing him 
 well married ; but (he was perfuaded, that 
 a confiderable alteration muft take place in 
 his manner of life and manner of think- 
 ing, before me could wifh to fee it take 
 place. 
 
 " Reft fatisfied, my dear Madam, that I 
 have no fuch plan at prefent," faid Clifton, 
 and immediately retired. 
 
 As this youth's attachment to Lady 
 Hornbury had been brought about more 
 by her Ladyfhip's manoeuvres, than by 
 his own, he had lefs to reproach himfelf 
 with in that, than fome of his other 
 intrigues ; but notwithftanding that the 
 i i 2 natural
 
 484 EDWARD. 
 
 natural candour of his mind had been 
 in fome degree perverted, as above- 
 mentioned, he was not perfectly free 
 from compunction, on account of that 
 train of life, which his paffions and 
 vanity led him into. Keen in the pur- 
 fuit of pleafure, he fpent lefs of his 
 time with Edward than formerly ; but 
 he valued no man's approbation fo much, 
 and he would have felt lighter at heart, 
 when reflecting on fome parts of his 
 own conduct, had he been able to bring 
 his friend to fee it in the fame palliative 
 light that fome others did. With a view 
 to procure himfelf this kind of confo- 
 lation, Clifton ibme'times introduced, as a 
 fubjedl: of converfation, the arts of de- 
 ceit fo often practifed in what is called 
 gallantry, and which Jie treated with that 
 partiality which men ufually have for 
 their own failings. On fuch occafions 
 Edward did not ufe the qualifying terms 
 employed by his friend, who therefore 
 found himfelf always difappointed in the 
 
 pal-
 
 EDWARD. 485 
 
 palliations he wiihed for. Clifton, in a 
 controverfy on this fubjed one day, fpoke 
 of gallantry as a game* 
 
 *' Are you not {hocked," faid Edward, 
 " at the unfairnefs of the flakes? Does not 
 the man play at a moft ungenerous ad- 
 vantage ? What proportion is there be- 
 tween the ruin the woman rifks, and the 
 inconveniencies to which the man may be 
 fubjected ? What would you think of the 
 cautious gamefler, who would endeavour 
 to perfuade an eafy youth to flake a thou- 
 fand pounds againfl a milling ? " 
 
 " As you are no Jofeph in your prac- 
 tice, my friend," replied Clifton, " one 
 might expecl: lefs feverity in your ex- 
 preflions." 
 
 " Without infifling on the difference," 
 faid Edward, " that there is between fe- 
 ducing a woman into what me ivi/bes to 
 avoid) arid being a party with her in 
 what me is refolvcd to do, I will not at- 
 tempt to juflify, either in myfelf or you, 
 my dear Clifton, what I know to be 
 J I 3 wrong \
 
 486 EDWARD. 
 
 wrong : if we cannot aft as we ought, 
 let us at leaft abftain from confirming our 
 minds in error, by vicious principles, which 
 tend to deaden even the defire of acting 
 better, and to pervert the conduct of thofe 
 whofe paflions might not have been of 
 ftrength fufficient to have drawn them 
 into erroneous or criminal purfuits." 
 
 Thofe difputes had not diminifhed their 
 friendihip, nor the entire confidence which 
 the two youths had in each other. On one 
 occafion, when the fubject of their con- 
 verfation was matrimony, Clifton declared, 
 <* That if by any art on the part of the 
 woman, or any infatuation of his own, 
 he fhould ever be drawn into that fcrape, 
 it would be unfortunate for both; becaufe 
 a woman without delicacy would imme- 
 diately become odious in his eyes, and 
 to a woman of delicacy he mould make a 
 ihocking hufband, for his natural fickle- 
 nefs was fuch, that no woman, however 
 amiable in .mind and perfon, could over- 
 come it, being convinced that paflion in 
 him could not furvive pofleflion a fingle 
 9 month ;
 
 EDWARD. 487 
 
 month ; and that the idea of diflembling 
 affection in the midft of indifference, 
 was to him infupportable ; for which 
 reafon, when any thing crofs or difagree- 
 able had ever occurred, he had always 
 confoled himfelf with the reflection, that 
 unlucky as it might be, ftill it was but 
 a flight misfortune, in comparifon with 
 that of beiog married ; and the recol- 
 lection of his being in a much more 
 comfortable fituation than thofe who 
 failed on the boifterous ocean of matri- 
 mony, never failed to throw a ray of fatif- 
 fadion thro' the darkeft gloom that his 
 mind had ever hitherto experienced, not 
 becaufe he had any pleafure in the diftrefs 
 of others, repeating from Lucretius, 
 
 Suave, mari mag no turbantibus sequora ventis, 
 E terra magnum alterius fpeclare laborem : 
 Ncn quia vexari quemquam eft jucunda voluptas, 
 Sed, quibus ipfe mails careas, quia cernere fuave eft; 
 
 and then added, that he had been often 
 afhamed to repine at the croffeft accident 
 that befel himfelf, when he looked around 
 and fav? fo many married men, all of 
 114 whom
 
 4 88 , EDWARD. 
 
 whom had, of courfe, more reafon to 
 complain of their lot, than he had, and 
 yet fome of them feemed to bear it with 
 wonderful patience and refignation." 
 
 To fuch declarations, which were made 
 'partly in a ferious manner, and partly with 
 an air of pleafantry, Edward replied in the 
 fame ftyle. 
 
 ** Very well, my friend, fmce you are 
 rcfolved never to marry, the fex muft bear 
 " it as well as they can ; but you certainly 
 have no right to behave to any one of 
 them, as if you had made a contrary refo- 
 lution in her favour, "
 
 E D \V A R D. 489 
 
 CHAP. XLVII. 
 
 L plus grand effort de I'amuie n'eft pas de montrer 
 nos defaults a un ami, c'eft de lui faire voir le fiens. 
 
 ROCHEFOUCAULT. 
 
 r\ N E evening after he had drank tea at 
 Mrs. Eafy's, Clifton finding himfelf 
 in no difpofition to go to any of the public 
 amufements, and ftill lefs inclined to go 
 to bed, he drove to Edward's chambers, 
 whom he rejoiced to find at home and 
 alone ; but he was hardly feated when 
 Carnaby Maukifh entered : " I am in high 
 luck, my dear fellows, in finding you 
 both," faid Carnaby; " I am juft come 
 from the Playhoufe, where a new piece 
 was a&ed." 
 
 " How did you like it ?" faid Edward. 
 
 " I paid little or no attention to it," 
 replied Carnaby ; " but I joined with the 
 hhTers." 
 
 " Why foT refumed Edward. 
 
 " I under-
 
 490 EDWARD. 
 
 " I underftand," fa id Carnaby, " that at 
 prcfent, the chance of being right is greatly 
 in their favour Mr. Wormwood was in 
 ihe fame box, and vehemently of our fide : 
 the piece however was fnatched from the 
 jaws of damnation, by the ability and 
 addrefs of the players ; for which Worm- 
 wood fwore they deferved to be damned 
 themfelves. He was leaving the box, when, 
 to induce him to remain, I aflured him, 
 that if he would only ftay till the farce 
 was over, I would afterwards accompany 
 him to fupper; he anfwered that he had 
 already got fuch a furfeit of nonfenfe^ that 
 he could bear no more that night. I then 
 offered to go with him, without waiting 
 for the' farce; for to confefs the truth I 
 hate nonfenfe as much as he does, but 
 he hurried out, notwithstanding all I could 
 fay, crying, * No, no, by heavens, I 
 cannot bear any more this night,' and fo 
 out he flung, fhutting the box-door with 
 violence after him ; on which'* 
 
 There is no knowing how long Car- 
 caby's clack would have continued, had 
 
 it
 
 EDWARD. 49I 
 
 it not been interrupted by a conjunct burft 
 of laughter from Clifton and Edward. 
 
 " I am glad to fee you fo merry, Gen- 
 tlemen," faid Garnaby, fomewhat piqued. 
 
 " Who could refrain from laughter, my 
 good fellow," faid Edward, " at the abfur- 
 dity of breaking from you, becaufe he 
 was difgufted at the infipidity of a play ?" 
 
 " How prepofterous !" added Clifton, 
 " for a man to fly from found fenfe, be- 
 caufe he was tired of nonfenfe." 
 
 " Why, it muft i>e confefled," faid Car- 
 naby, recovering his good-humour, " that 
 i have long fufpected Wormwood to be 
 a very filly old fellow but where fhall 
 we fup?" 
 
 To this queftion, Clifton, who was not 
 in a humour for Carnaby's company, an- 
 fwered, " You muft excufe us this night; 
 I have private bufmefs with Edward, and 
 am juft arrived on that account." 
 
 " Private bufmefs ! egad, that is a good 
 one," faid Carnaby, " all the world knows 
 that your private bufmefs is entirely with 
 the women; and I heard, this very day, 
 
 that
 
 49^ EDWARD. 
 
 that you had broken with Lady Horn- 
 bury, and were entirely devoted to Mifs 
 Barnet." 
 
 Clifton did not reliih this obfervation, 
 particularly in the hearing of Edward; he 
 anfwered in fomewhat of an angry tone, 
 that he was furprifed that a man of Mr. 
 Shadow's profound fenfe mould retail 
 every falfe or idle obfervation he heard. 
 Carnaby began to apologize, but Clifton 
 interrupted him, repeating, that he had 
 particular bufmefs with Edward. 
 
 " It is curfed hard, however," faid Car- 
 naby, " that your bufmefs mould be on 
 this night, for I do not know what the 
 devil to do with myfelf." 
 
 <c It is furprifmg, that you mould be at 
 a lofs to pafs two hours in your own 
 company," faid Edward. 
 
 " It may be as furprifmg as it pleafes," 
 replied Carnaby, as he was leaving the 
 room; " but I'll be hanged if it is not true, 
 for I do not know what the devil to do 
 with myfelf." 
 
 "The
 
 EDWARD. 493 
 
 ' The delightful fituation in which poor 
 Carnaby declares himfelf to be," faid Cltf- 
 ton to Edward, after the other was gone, 
 ** I fancy you never experienced ?" 
 
 " I am certain I mould fometimes have 
 a tafte of it, however," replied Edward, 
 " were it not for the entertainment which 
 thefe ingenious gentlemen afford me," 
 pointing to his books ; " for to fay the 
 truth, I can hardly conceive how life, fhort 
 as it is, can be paffed without many dreary 
 intervals of tedium, by thofe who have not 
 their bread to earn, if they could not call 
 in the afiiftance of our worthy mute friends 
 there." 
 
 Clifton. Have we net horfes, hounds, 
 the theatres, cards, and the bottle ? 
 
 Edward. They are all of ufe occafion- 
 ally, no doubt, but the weather may for- 
 bid the two firft; the fame kind of non- 
 fenfe which difgufted our friend Worm- 
 wood, may drive us from the third ; the 
 aflbciation of others is necefTary for the 
 fourth, and alfo for the fifth, unlefs to 
 thofe who are already funk into the low- 
 eft
 
 494 E D \V A R D. 
 
 eft ftate of wretchednefs and degradation : 
 but the entertainment which books afford 
 can be enjoyed in the worft weather, can 
 be varied as we pleafe, obtained in folitude, 
 and, inftead of blunting, fharpens the un- 
 derftanding ; but the moft valuable effect of 
 a tafte for reading is, that it often preferves 
 us from bad company. 
 
 Clifton. How do you mean ? 
 
 Edward. I mean, that thofe are not 
 apt to go to or remain with difagreeable 
 people abroad, who are always certain of a 
 pleafant party at home. 
 
 Clifton. This happy turn of mind you 
 fc owe to Mrs. Barnet, Ned. 
 
 Edward. I lie under infinite obligations 
 to that excellent woman ; my tafte for read- 
 ing was firft cherifhed and improved by 
 her ; but the misfortunes of my childhood 
 were, perhaps, what principally excited early 
 reflection, and led me to a fondnefs for 
 iludy. 
 
 " What a lively pretty girl her daughter 
 has become ?" faid Clifton, a little abruptly, 
 
 from
 
 EDWARD. 495 
 
 from his thinking more on the young Lady 
 than on what Edward had faid. 
 
 Edward. Mifs Barnet was always ib. 
 Clifton. Particularly of late ; there is 
 fomething extremely agreeable about her, 
 and Ihe is not deficient in wit. 
 
 Edward. How could the daughter of 
 fuch a woman as Mrs. Barnet have been 
 deficient in wit ? 
 
 Clifton. No otherwife, perhaps, than by 
 the accident of her being alfo the daughter 
 of fuch a man as Mr. Barnet. 
 
 Edward. I fhould flill have expected 
 wit to predominate in their daughter. 
 
 Clifton (fmiling). That is to fay, that the 
 mother's wit is greater than the father's 
 dullnefs, which I meant not to conteft with 
 you. 
 
 Edward (a little warmly). I have not 
 admitted the latter; but of this I am certain, 
 that Mr. Barnet has performed acts of be- 
 nevolence, that would do honour to the 
 "greateft wit in the nation. 
 
 Clifton. I know it, and honour him for 
 it, my dear Ned j I wiih to fay nothing dif- 
 
 refpec>M
 
 496 E D W A R D. 
 
 refpectful of Mr. Barnet, but I was fpeaking 
 of Mifs Barnet\ wit, of which fhe certainly 
 has a confiderable fhare, as well as her 
 mother, although their manner is fotnewhat 
 different. 
 
 Edward. Mrs. Barnet's converfation 
 leaves the impreflion that fhe pofTefTes more 
 'wit than {he choofes to difplay. 
 
 Clifton. Whereas her daughter, perhaps, 
 is fond of exhibiting all that fhe has. 
 
 Edward. You feem ftrangely inclined 
 to-day to draw inferences from what I fay ; 
 that I did not mean ; Mifs Barnet is equally 
 fprightly and agreeable ; but it is naturally 
 to be expected that the converfation of a 
 lively young woman will be different from 
 that of a woman of more age and expe- 
 rience. 
 
 To this Clifton anfwered,' " Surely, 
 furely ;" and then introduced a new 
 fubjeft of converfation ; during which, 
 however, he fometimes difcovered that 
 he was ftili occupied with that from 
 which he had fo fuddenly turned ; for 
 4 once
 
 EDWARD. 497 
 
 once or twice he mentioned Mifs Barnet, 
 inftead of another Lady of whom they were 
 talking. 
 
 Thefe repeated inftances of abfence at 
 length ftruck Clifton himfelf, made him, 
 leave his friend fooner than he intended, 
 and were afterwards the caufe of his avoid- 
 ing to fpeak of Mifs Barnet, and of his 
 maintaining great referve in Edward's pre- 
 fence, when her name was mentioned by 
 any other perfon. 
 
 This did not efcape the obfervation of 
 Edward ; who being afterwards informed 
 from better authority than that of Mr. 
 Carnaby Shadow, that Clifton no more vi- 
 fited Lady Hornbury, and was frequently 
 at Mrs. Eafy's, he took a ftrong fufpicion 
 that Mifs Barnet was the caufe of his breach 
 with the one, and his vifits to the other. 
 
 The unvaried propriety of Edward's be- 
 haviour to that young Lady, joined to the 
 general fweetnefs of his manners, had long 
 fince effaced the prejudice which in her 
 
 VOL. i. K K early
 
 498 E D W A R D. 
 
 early youth {he had entertained againft him ; 
 he, en his part, viewed with the partiality 
 of a brother every good quality fhe poflefled, 
 and felt an additional intereft in her, as the 
 daughter of the perfon on earth for whom 
 he had the higheft efteem and warmeft af- 
 fection; but that referve which her former 
 conduct had obliged him to afiume, he ftill 
 maintained towards her, notwithstanding 
 that her behaviour to him was more eafy 
 and frank than formerly. This, without 
 weakening the efteem which Louifa en-, 
 tertained for Edward, rendered her lefs 
 lively in his company, than in that of 
 others. 
 
 From the moment that Edward perceived 
 Clifton's attention directed to Mifs Barnet, 
 he was uneafy on her account ; the feducing 
 graces of his perfon and manner, the loofe- 
 nefs of his principles in matters of gallantry, 
 his averfioa to marriage, and her entire 
 want of caution, increafed his uneafmefs the 
 more he reflected on them; and he was 
 much at a lofs how he ought to act. The 
 
 referve
 
 EDWARD. 499 
 
 referve which had been fo long kept up 
 between him and Mifs Barnet rendered it 
 difficult for him to give her any caution on 
 the fubject ; and when it occurred to him 
 to unfold the fource of his uneafmefs to 
 Mrs. Earnet, he fhrunk from the idea of 
 hinting any thing to the difadvantage of his 
 friend. He felt equal reluctance againft 
 infmuating any thing to Mifs. Barnet's dif- 
 advantage, or which could, in any way, 
 hurt the fenfibility of her mother. 
 
 He refolved at laft to ifpeak to Clifton 
 on the fubjecl:; but as often as he began 
 to put his refolution into practice, being 
 himfelf a good deal agitated, his manner was 
 rather folemn, and Clifton met his fo- 
 lemnity with fo much pleafantry, and 
 evaded his inquiries with fuch a carelefsair 
 of jocularity, as at once defeated Edward's 
 purpofe, and diminifhed his fufpicions. 
 
 With whatever affiduity Edward had 
 
 fludied the law, he had no great defire for 
 
 following it as a profeffion. This had been 
 
 long known to Clifton, who therefore had 
 
 K K 2 been
 
 500 E D \V A R D. 
 
 been exerting all his interefl with his friend?, 
 fome of whom were at this time in power, 
 to obtain a refpectable fituation for Edward, 
 which would put him out of the neceffity 
 of becoming a profefled lawyer. 
 
 Mr. Clifton, however, faid nothing of this 
 to Edward, until he had good affurance of 
 fuccefs, which he received a little before the 
 period we are treating of, and was then 
 happy to find that the fituation he had in view 
 was extremely agreeable to Edward, who 
 immediately acquainted Mrs. Barnet, ex- 
 prefling to her that deep fenfe of gratitude 
 which Clifton's conduct had imprefled on 
 his mind, but of which he had been un- 
 able to fay a word to Clifton himfelf. It 
 was agreed not to mention to Mr. Barnet 
 what was in view for Edward, until fuccefs 
 was more certain. At this particular time, 
 therefore, Clifton's mind was occupied with 
 two objects as oppofite as virtue and vice j a 
 folicitude to ferve the man and ruin the 
 woman he loved. It might naturally be 
 thought that two defigns of fuch dif- 
 
 ccrdant
 
 EDWARD. 501 
 
 cordant natures could not be formed in the 
 fame breaft ; thofe who think fo are unac- 
 quainted with the power of prejudice and 
 influence of manners, in perverting our 
 views of things. 
 
 3
 
 502 E D W A R D. 
 
 CHAP. XLVIII. 
 
 Ce qui rend la vanite des autres infupportable, c'eft 
 qu'elle blefle la notre. ROCHEFOUCAULT. 
 
 T ADY Hornbury was piqued in the moft 
 fenfible manner, at being fo openly de- 
 ferted by Clifton ; her vanity was much 
 more wounded than her affection ; of the 
 firftfhe had a great deal, of the fecond a very 
 fmall quantity ; and what little (he poflefled, 
 {he had the faculty of turning from one ob- 
 ject to another with wonderful facility, as 
 whim or ambition prompted. Had flie fore- 
 feen the moment that Clifton was to quit 
 her, fhe would have precluded the mortifi- 
 cation, by difcharging him from vifiting 
 her ; and the blow being thus warded from 
 her vanity, fhe would have diredlly looked 
 out for a new lover, with undifturbed cool- 
 nefs and circumfpection. But the abrupt 
 
 manner
 
 EDWARD. 503 
 
 manner of Clifton's quiting her had put this 
 out of her power, and produced nine-tenths 
 of the uneafmeis fhe felt on the fubjedt. 
 
 A female friend of Lady Hornbury, juft 
 fuch a friend as her Ladyship was herfelf, 
 entertained her one forenoon with a long 
 enumeration of circumftanees, to prove how 
 much Mr. Clifton was attached to Mifs 
 Earner. This fhe did, under the femblance 
 of abufing Clifton, but in reality to enjoy 
 her dear friend's mortification ; and fhe con- 
 cluded by hinting, that fhe wquld write to 
 Mrs. Barnet, with whom fhe had a flight 
 acquaintance, to inform her of the danger- 
 ous fituation in which her daughter was, 
 that fhe might fend for her to the country. 
 Lady Hornbury, who was not entirely 
 blind to the real motives of her friend, 
 heard her narrative with an air of indiffe- 
 rence, thanked her for her obliging inten- 
 tions, begging however, that fhe would not 
 put them in execution, on the pretence that 
 a hint of that nature was liable to malignant 
 conftru&ion. 
 
 K K 4 Lady
 
 504 E D \V A R D. 
 
 Lady Hornbury's t real motive for pre* 
 eluding Mrs. Barnet from this information 
 was, that her hatred to Mifs Barnet was 
 greater than her love for Clifton had ever 
 been, and fhe actually wifhed him fpeedily 
 to fucceed in his defigns on the young Lady; 
 becaufe (he thought there was a greater 
 probability of his becoming defirous of re- 
 turning to herfelf after fuccefs than before, 
 not that fhe wifhed ever to renew with 
 him, but merely that fhe might fhew the 
 world fhe had it in her power, and had 
 rejected it. 
 
 From Mr. Clifton's repeated vifits, and 
 his particular attention to Mifs Barnet, Mrs. 
 Eafy began to imagine that he intended to 
 propofe marriage to that young Lady, for 
 fhe had not any fufpicion of his harbouring 
 lefs honourable defigns ; but fhe deferred 
 giving any hint of this to Mrs. Barnet, until 
 her conjecture fhould be fupported by ftill 
 Wronger prefumptions. 
 
 Mifs Barnet found her vanity gratified, 
 and her mind amufed by the gay converfa- 
 
 tion
 
 EDWARD. 505 
 
 tion of Clifton ; the hours danced lightly 
 along ; fhe was in everlafting good humour 
 and high fpirits, which never for a moment 
 were lowered by reflection. Mifs Eafy was 
 fincerely attached to Mifs Barnet ; delighted 
 with the company of Clifton ; law, without 
 envy, the preference he and the men in 
 general gave her friend, of whole fuperior 
 power of pleafmg fhe was fenfible; and 
 what will appear to many extraordinary, 
 her friendmip for Louifa was not dimi- 
 nilhed on that account. 
 
 Airs. Eaiy had lately engaged a maid, 
 who had been in Lady Hornbury's iervice, 
 and was fuppofed to have enjoyed a good 
 deal of her confidence ; by means of this 
 maid, who had long been devoted to Clifton, 
 he was informed, unknown to them, of 
 many of their engagements, where he had 
 a certainty of meeting them, and at what 
 hours he would find them at home. Of this 
 intelligence Ciifron made the moil attentive 
 ufe; but his behaviour on a particular occa- 
 fion, when he accompanied the Ladies to 
 one of she Theatres, promoted his views 
 
 iLore
 
 5 o6 EDWARD. 
 
 more than all the pains he took. Imme- 
 diately after the play, and before the farce, 
 he waited in. the outer room until Mrs. 
 Eafy's coach fhould be called. While he 
 was talking to that Lady and her daughter, 
 Ivlifs Barnet happened for an inftant to 
 fland a little apart, fo as not to feem to 
 be of the party : two young fellows entered 
 the room, one of them a little fluttered ; he 
 flared hard at Mifs Barnet ; fhe held down 
 her head to avoid the boldnefs of his look ; 
 he then raifed the edge of her hat, that he 
 might view her face more fully, while his 
 other hand approached her bofom : at that 
 inftant Clifton ftruck him fo violent a blow 
 in the face as ftaggered him. He fell 
 backwards over a form, and his head ftruck 
 againft the furbafe of the wall. 
 
 " Does any body know this fellow ?" faid 
 Clifton, addrefling the fpedtators, who 
 crowded from the paflages into the room ; 
 *' he is certainly not a gentleman." 
 
 " Yes he is," faid the perfon who had 
 accompanied him ; " and one worth a hun- 
 dred thoufand pounds 1" 
 
 6 " Well,"
 
 EDWARD. 507 
 
 Well," refumed Clifton, be fo gocd as 
 deliver him this card, that he may know 
 where to find one who will be at his call, 
 fhould he be inclined to eftablifh his claim 
 to the character of a gentleman on another 
 foundation." So faying, he prefented him 
 with his addrefs. 
 
 Mrs. Eafy's carnage being announced at 
 the fame time, he attended the Ladies to 
 it, was earneftly preffed to accompany them 
 home, and went accordingly. 
 
 At fupper Mrs, Eafy exprefled fears what 
 might be the confequences of this adven- 
 ture, and the young Ladies {hewed marks 
 of folicitude on the fame fubject. The 
 breaft of Louifa, in particular, glowed with 
 gratitude, for the fplrit with which Clifton 
 had repelled the infult that had been offered 
 to herfelf, while fhe admired the dignity of 
 his conduct in the whole tranfation. 
 Clifton's converfation was particularly gay 
 while he remained with the Ladies ; but the 
 apprehenfions they had refpecting what 
 might happen in the morning prevented 
 
 hi*
 
 5 o8 E D \V A R D. 
 
 his gaiety from having its ufual effect on 
 them. 
 
 When Clifton returned to his lodgings, he 
 told his footman, that he fhould be at home 
 all the following morning ; defired that he 
 might be apprifed, without delay, when any 
 gentleman called ; and that all letters ad- 
 drefled to him fhould be brought up di- 
 rectly, whether he was in bed or not. 
 
 He was waked next morning to receive 
 a letter of a different nature from what he 
 expected ; it was from Mrs. Eafy's maid, 
 to inform him, that Mrs. and Mifs Eafy 
 propofed to go, immediately after breakfaft, 
 to the city to vifit a relation, of whofe in- 
 difpofition they had been juft informed, 
 and that they did not intend to return till 
 near four o'clock ; that Mils Barnet was to 
 remain at home, and had already given 
 orders that fhe fhould be denied to every 
 body ; but neverthelefs, the maid added, (he 
 would venture to difobey, in cafe he JJjould 
 call. 
 
 The contents of this note perplexed 
 
 Clifton a good deal. After what had palled 
 
 9 *
 
 EDWARD. ,509 
 
 at the play-boufe, and after what he himfelf 
 liad faid, it would have had an aukward 
 appearance if he fhould be from home when 
 the perfon he expected called ; at the fame 
 time he could not bear the thoughts of 
 lofing fuch an opportunity of being alone 
 with Mifs Barnet, efpecially as he had fome 
 idea, though totally without foundation, 
 that {he was privy to the notice which the 
 Hiaid had given him.
 
 5 io E D W A R D. 
 
 CHAP. XLIX. 
 
 With thee be Chaftity, of all afraid, 
 Diftrufting all, a wife fufpicious maid. 
 But man the inoft, not more the mountain doe 
 Holds the fwift faulcon for her deadly foe. 
 
 COLLINS. 
 
 TOOTHING fhould induce the fex to more 
 circumfpection than the fevere and 
 uncandid .conftructions which are apt to be 
 put on their behaviour. Many men, even 
 of thofe who are not confidered as cox- 
 combs, or diftinguimed for vanity, are prone 
 to conftriie every mark of attention to 
 themfelves as a proof of a greater degree of 
 favour than was intended. In the prefent 
 inftance Clifton did great injuftice to Mifs 
 Barnet ; who, although fhe was giddy from 
 youthful vanity, imprudent from the great 
 vivacity of her character, and fufceptible, 
 perhaps, of having her fenfes furprifed, yet 
 
 would
 
 E p W A R D. 511 
 
 would certainly have turned the treacherous 
 maid to the door, and refufed the vifit of 
 Clifton, had me known the information 
 that had been fent, or fufpected his defigns. 
 What renders his ungenerous conftru&ions 
 of her conduct ftill more revolting is, that 
 at the very time he made them, and was 
 meditating her ruin, the mind of the young 
 Lady was occupied with a friendly folici- 
 tude for his fafety. 
 
 Clifton ftaid at home till a little after 
 twelve o'clock j he then became too im- 
 patient to fee Mifs Barnet to ftay any 
 longer, and wrote a letter in the following 
 terms : 
 
 " Indifpenfable bufmefs obliges me to go 
 out : I mall return before four o'clock, and 
 will wait on you when and where you fhall 
 be pleafed to appoint. 
 
 " J. CLIFTON." 
 
 Having defcribed the perfon with whom 
 He had the fquabble and his companion, he 
 
 de fired
 
 5 i2 E D \V A R D. 
 
 defired the fervant to give this note to either 
 of them who nvght call ; and he enjoined 
 } the fervant to remain at home all day, that 
 he might not run any rifk of miffing 
 them. 
 
 Clifton then hurried to Mrs. Eafy's, 
 knocked gently at the door, was admitted by 
 the maid, who, on different pretexts, had fent 
 the other fervants out of the way. 
 
 Louifa Barnet was at that time writing to 
 her mother an account of the play-houfe 
 adventure, containing a high eulogium on 
 the gallant behaviour of Mr. Clifton, and ex* 
 preflive of her own fears and anxieties re- 
 fpedting what might be the confequences. 
 She was in a room commonly ufed by 
 Mrs. Eafy when (he did not admit com- 
 pany, in which her daughter and Louiia 
 were accuftomed to read alternately to her, 
 while (he reclined on the couch. 
 
 Mifs Barnet was carelefsly drefled, yet in 
 a ftyle more favourable to her natural beau- 
 ties than the moft refined arts of the toilet 
 could have produced. 
 
 The
 
 EDWARD. 513 
 
 The maid announced Clifton rather ab- 
 ruptly, faying " (he could not help believ- 
 ing that he was not meant to be included 
 in the general order for denial." And then 
 fhe withdrew. 
 
 Mifs Barnet, who was at firft provoked 
 and difconcerted, foon forgot the negli- 
 gence of her own drefs, and the fingularity 
 of the maid's conduct, in the pleafure of 
 feeing Clifton in fafety. 
 
 She inquired with precipitation, whether 
 he had heard any thing from the play- 
 houfe-men, and understanding he had not, 
 whether he expected to hear from them; 
 to this Clifton anfwered, " that he did not 
 think about them." 
 
 " You are certainly right," faid fhe ; 
 " they are not worth thinking of; they 
 afTuredly are not Gentlemen, and what- 
 ever meflage fuch fellows may fend, you 
 ought to take no notice of it." 
 
 To this obfervation Clifton faid nothing; 
 on which fhe repeated it earneftly, looking 
 in his face for an anfwer. 
 
 VOL. i. L L He
 
 5 i4 EDWARD. 
 
 He fmiled, without fpeaking. 
 
 She then expreffed her uneafmefs at the 
 idea of his having been involved in any 
 trouble or danger on her account. 
 
 Treating with contempt the idea of 
 danger, he exprefled great fatisfaclion in 
 having chaftifed the author of an infult 
 offered to her, declaring that he would 
 ever think it the greateft honour that 
 could befall him, to have it in his power 
 to be of any fervice to her, and proceeded 
 in warmer terms, and a more earneft man- 
 ner than he had ever ufed before, to aflert 
 his admiration of her beauty and accom- 
 plifhments, with many profeffions of at- 
 tachment, accompanied with a prefiure of 
 her hand, and the moft feducing looks and 
 tone of voice. 
 
 Had he ventured on fuch a flile and 
 manner of addrefs at any other time, or 
 had he aflumed them at once, Louifa 
 would have perceived their aim, and 
 would foon have thrown him out of his 
 game; but for fome time before Clifton 
 
 entered,
 
 EDWARD. 515 
 
 entered, (he had been reflecting with gra- 
 titude on his behaviour the preceding 
 night, and with folicitude for the danger 
 to which he was flill expofed; her breaft 
 glowed not, as formerly, with mere vanity, 
 on account of having drawn a man of 
 fafhion from the ftandard of a rival beauty, 
 but with efteem for him as a man of fpirit, 
 who (he imagined equally efteemed her, 
 and whom me confidered in the light of a 
 benefactor. The fatisfadtion he exprefled 
 in having punifhed a man who had in- 
 fulted her, and the pleafure he would take 
 in rendering her future fervices, were the 
 natural anfwers to the uneafmefs fhe 
 ihewed on his account, and led to thofe 
 vague, but warm declarations of attach- 
 ment, which fhe would have difregarded 
 at another time, but which at prefent were 
 not heard with fuch coolnefs, as to leave 
 her all the circumfpection her fituation 
 required. As the enterprifing fervour of 
 Clifton's eloquence gradually increafed, her 
 emotion was alfo gaining upon her, when 
 LL 2 fhe
 
 5 i6 EDWARD. 
 
 {he was fuddenly reftored to recolle&ion 
 by a noife at the door, a few moments 
 after which, Edward entered the room. 
 Clifton had juft had time to gain the 
 window, at which he flood, affecting an 
 air of careleflhefs ; Louifa was feated at a 
 diftance from him. 
 
 Edward, without (hewing furprize, ad- 
 drefled her, faying, " that as he had heard 
 ihe was at home, he had called to inquire 
 after Mr. Barnet's health, as he fuppofed 
 fhe had received accounts of it from her 
 mother." She anfwered with an air of 
 referve not free from confufion ; he then 
 turned to Clifton, whofe affected eafe was 
 \ mixed with evident marks of difpleafure : 
 never were three people more at a lofs 
 to continue a converfation. Clifton glowed 
 with refentment againft Edward for his 
 intrufion ; Mifs Barnet's returning re- 
 flection began to make her view it as a 
 fortunate circumftance, but this very idea 
 diftrefled her at the prefence of the one, 
 almoft as much as the other ; and fhs 
 
 impatiently
 
 E D W A R D. 5 i 7 
 
 impatiently wifhed for the abfence of 
 both ; Edward, although fatisfied with 
 his own conduct, felt pain on her ac- 
 count, and turned his eyes again on 
 Clifton, to obferve if he was inclined to 
 withdraw. 
 
 They were all relieved in fome meafure, 
 by the arrival of Mrs. and Mifs Eafy, 
 who- having been at the houfe of their 
 relation, were there informed, that fhe had 
 been forbid by her phyfician, to fee any 
 perfon whoever, on which they had re- 
 turned home directly. 
 
 Mrs. and Mifs Eafy were equally pleafecf 
 and furprifed at the fight of Clifton; ihef ' 
 had been converfing together, all the way 
 from the city, on the fubject of his quarrel, 
 and had remained in anxious fufpence 
 refpecting the confequences. Immediately 
 on entering the room, they both addreffed 
 him with peculiar attention, but without 
 mentioning or alluding to the fource of this 
 uncommon degree of intereft ; to Edward 
 they fpoke with their ufual civility, after 
 
 which
 
 518 EDWARD. 
 
 which Mifs Eafy turning to Mifs Earner, 
 exclaimed, a little abruptly, " I under- 
 ftood, my dear, that you intended to em- 
 ploy the whole morning in writing 
 letters. " 
 
 " I fear," faid Edward, willing to convey 
 the idea that Clifton and he had come 
 together, ct that we intruded on Mifs 
 Barnet." 
 
 Clifton darted an angry look at him, 
 but Mils Eafy, whofe mind dwelt on the 
 danger to which fhe fuppofed Mr. Clifton 
 was Hill expcfed, from the two play-houfe 
 gentlemen, replied, and while ihe fpoke 
 fhe looked at Clifton, " I am certain your 
 vifits could not appear to her an intrufion, 
 particularly at this time." 
 
 This remark tended to increafe the re- 
 fentment which Clifton felt, however un- 
 juftly, againft his friend, and being em- 
 barrafTed what to fay, or how to behave, 
 be withdrew. 
 
 Edward continued the converfation with 
 Mrs. and Mifs Eafy for a confiderable time, ' 
 
 but
 
 EDWARD. 
 
 519 
 
 but on its being remarked that Mifs Barnet 
 took no part in it, and the former afking 
 if fhe was not a little indifpofed, he took 
 his leave. 
 
 END OF THE FIRST VOLUME,
 
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