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 1. SHERIDAN'S PLAYS. 
 
 2. PLAYS FROM MOLIERE. By English Dramatists. 
 
 3. MARLOWE'S FAUSTUS & GOETHE'S FAUST. 
 4- CHRONICLE OF THE CID. 
 
 5. RABELAIS' GARGANTUA AND THE HEROIC 
 
 DEEDS OF PANTAGRUEL. 
 
 6. THE PRINCE. By MachiavelU. 
 
 7. BACON'S ESSAYS. 
 
 8. DE FOE'S JOURNAL OF THE PLAGUE YEAR. 
 
 9. LOCKE ON CIVIL GOVERNMENT; WITH 
 
 SIR ROBERT FILMER'S PATRIARGHA. 
 10. BUTLER'S ANALOGY OF RELIGION, 
 fi. DRYDEN'S VIRGIL. 
 12. SIR WALTER SCOTT'S DEMONOLOGY AND 
 
 WITCHCRAFT. 
 
 13- HERRICK'S HESPERIDES. 
 
 14- COLERIDGE S TABLE TALK: WITH THE 
 
 ANCIENT MARINER AND CHRISTABEL 
 
 15. BOCCACCIO'S DECAMERON. 
 
 1 6. STERNE'S TRISTRAM SHANDY. 
 
 17. HOMER'S ILIAD, Translated by George Chapman. 
 
 1 8. MEDIAEVAL TALES. 
 
 19. JOHNSON'S RASSELAS; AND VOLTAIRE'S 
 
 CANDIDE. 
 
 20. PLAYS AND POEMS BY BEN JONSON. 
 
 21. HOBBES'S LEVIATHAN. 
 
 22. BUTLER'S HUDIBRAS. 
 
 23. IDEAL COMMONWEALTHS: MORE'S 
 
 UTOPIA; BACON'S NEW ATLANTIS; AND CAM- 
 PANELLA'S CITY OF THE SUN. 
 
 24. CAVENDISH'S LIFE OF WOLSEY. 
 25 and 26! DON QUIXOTE (Two Volumes). 
 
 27. BURLESQUE PLAYS AND POEMS. [lation 
 
 28. DANTE'S DIVINE COMEDY. Longfellow's Trans- 
 
 29. GOLDSMITH'S VICAR OF WAKEFIELD, 
 
 PLAYS AND POEMS. 
 
 30. FABLES and PROVERBS from the SANSKRIT. 
 
 31. CHARLES LAMB'S ESSAYS OF ELIA.
 
 MORLEY'S UNIVERSAL LIBRARY. 
 
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 32. THE HISTORY OF THOMAS ELLWOOD, 
 
 Written by Himself. 
 
 33. EMERSON'S ESSAYS, REPRESENTATIVE 
 
 MEN, AND SOCIETY AND SOLITUDE. 
 34- SOUTHEY'S LIFE OF NELSON. 
 
 35. DE QUINCEY'S OPIUM EATER, SHAKS^ 
 
 PEARE, GOETHE. 
 
 36. STORIES OF IRELAND. By Maria Edgeworth. 
 37- THE PLAYS OF ARISTOPHANES, Translated by 
 
 Frere. 
 38. SPEECHES AND LETTERS. By Edmund Burke. 
 
 39- THOMAS A KEMPIS' IMITATION OFCHRIST. 
 40. POPULAR SONGS OF IRELAND, Collected by 
 
 Thomas Crofton Croker. 
 
 41- THE PLAYS of AESCHYLUS, Translated by R. Potter. 
 42. GOETHE'S FAUST, the Second Part. 
 43- FAMOUS PAMPHLETS. 
 44. SOPHOCLES, Translated by Francklin. 
 45- TALES OF TERROR AND WONDER. 
 46. VESTIGES OF THE NATURAL HISTORY OF 
 
 CREATION. 
 47- THE BARONS' WARS, &c. By Michael Drayton. 
 
 48. COBBETT'S ADVICE TO A YOUNG MAN. 
 
 49. THE BANQUET OF DANTE. Translated by Eliza- 
 
 beth Price Sayer. 
 
 50. WALKER'S ORIGINAL. 
 
 51. POEMS AND BALLADS BY SCHILLER. 
 
 52. PEELE'S PLAYS AND POEMS. 
 
 53. HARRINGTON'S OCEANA. 
 
 54. KURIPIDES ALCESTIS, ETC. 
 .55. ESSAYS. By Winthrop Mackworth Praed. 
 
 56. TRADITIONAL TALES. Allan Cunningham. 
 
 57. HOOKER'S ECCLESIASTICAL POLITY. 
 
 Books I. to IV. 
 
 58. EURIPIDES BACCHANALS, ETC. 
 
 59. WALTON'S LIVES OF DONNE, WOTION, 
 
 HOOKER, AND GEORGE HERBERT, ETC. 
 
 60. ARISTOTLE ON GOVERNMENT. 
 
 61. EURIPIDESHECUBA, AND OTHER PLAYS. 
 
 62. RABELAIS' HEROIC DEEDS OF PANTA- 
 
 GRUEL. Books III., IV., and V. 
 
 63. A MISCELLANY.
 
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 ARISTOPHANES 
 
 A METRICAL VERSION OF 
 
 THE ACHARNIANS, THE KNIGHTS 
 AND THE BIRDS 
 
 WITH OCCASIONAL COMMENT 
 
 LL.D., PROFESSOR OK ENGLISH LITERATURE AT 
 UNIVERSITY COLLEGE, LONDON 
 
 SECOND EDITION 
 
 LONDON 
 ROUTLEDGE AND SONS 
 
 BROADWAY, LUDGATE HILL 
 
 t GLASGOW AND NEW YORK 
 
 1887
 
 MORLEY'S UNIVERSAL LIBRARY. 
 
 I. Sheridan's Plays. 29. Goldsmith's Vicar of Wake- 
 
 2. Plays from Moliere. By field, Plays, and Poems. 
 
 English Dramatists. , 3O. Fables and Proverbs from 
 
 3. Marlowe's Faustus and 
 
 the Sanskrit. (Hitopadesa.) 
 
 Goethe's Faust. 
 
 31. Lamb's Essays of Elia. 
 
 4. Chronicle of the Cid. 
 
 32. The History of Thomas 
 
 5. Rabelais' Gargantuaandihe 
 Heroic Deeds of Pantagruel. 
 
 Elhvood. 
 33. Emerson's Essays, <5rV. 
 
 6. Machiavelh's Prince. 
 
 34. Southey's Life of Nelson. 
 
 7. Bacon's Essays. 
 
 35. De Quincey's Confessions 
 
 8. Defoe's Journal of the 
 
 of an Opium-Eater, &c. 
 
 Plague Year. 
 
 36. Stories of Ireland. By Miss 
 
 9. Locke on Civil Government 
 
 EDGEWORTH. 
 
 and Filmer's "Patriarcha." 
 
 37. Frere's Aristophanes: 
 
 10. Butler's Analogy of Religion. 
 1 1 . Dryden's Virgil. 
 
 Achamians, Knights, Birds. 
 38. Burke' s Speeches and Letters. 
 
 12. Scoffs Demonology and 
 
 39. Thomas a Kempis. 
 
 Witchcraft. 
 
 40. Popular Songs of Ireland. 
 
 13. derrick's Hesperidns. 
 
 41. Potter's JEschylus. 
 
 14. Coleridge's Table- Talk. 
 
 42. Goethe's Faust: Part II. 
 
 15- Boccaccio's Decameron. 
 
 ANSTER'S Translation. 
 
 1 6. Sterne's Tristram Shandy. 
 
 43. Famous Pamphlets. 
 
 17. Chapman's Homer's Iliad. 
 
 44. Francklin's Sophocles. 
 
 1 8. Medueval Tales. 
 
 45. M. G. Lewis's Tales of 
 
 19. Voltaire's Candide, and 
 Johnson's Rasselas. 
 
 Terror and Wonder. 
 46. Vestiges of the Natural 
 
 20. jfonson's Plays and Poems. 
 21. Hobbes's Leviathan. 
 
 History of Creation. 
 47. Dray ton's Barons' Wars, 
 
 22. Samuel Butler's Hudibras. 
 23. Ideal Commonwealths. 
 
 Nymphidia, &c. 
 48. Cobbett's Advice to Young 
 
 Men. 
 
 24. Cavendish's Life of IVolsey. 
 25 & 26. Z?<w Quixote. 
 2 7 . Burlesque Plays ani Poems. 
 
 49. The Banquet of Dante. 
 50. Walker's Original. 
 51. Schiller's Poems and 
 
 28. Dante's Divine Comedy. 
 
 Ballads. 
 
 LONGFELLOW'S Translation. 
 
 52. Peele's Plays and Poems. 
 
 " Marvels of clear type and general neatness." Daily Telegraph,
 
 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 ARISTOPHANES, son of Philippus, was born in Athens about 
 the year 444 before Christ, and lived probably to the age of 
 about seventy-six. He made social as well as political use of 
 his wit, and wrote (B.C. 427) his first comedy, " The Banquetters," 
 when he was yet a youth below the legal age for competing for a 
 prize. That eomedy was the satire of one fresh from the schools 
 upon the sophistries that had crept into the Athenian system of 
 education. There was a father whose two sons had been edu- 
 cated, one in the good old way, the other in the new way, and 
 the chorus, which gave its name to the play, was of a party who 
 had been feasting in the temple of Hercules. That play is 
 known only by tradition ; and the next play, " The Babylonians." 
 produced in the next year in the name of Callistratus, is also 
 lost. It obtained the first prize, and was a political caricature 
 of the system of appointing to public offices by lot. Next fol- 
 lowed, and in the next year (B.C. 425), also produced in the name of 
 Callistratus, " The Acharnians," the first play in this volume, pro- 
 duced when the poet's age was about nineteen. "The Knights " 
 the second play here given followed a year later, and was the 
 first play produced by Aristophanes in his own name. Each of 
 these plays won the first prize in competition. The other plays 
 omitting those which have been lost and are known only 
 by tradition were : " The Clouds " (B.C. 423) ; " The Wasps " 
 (B.C. 422); "Peace" (B.C. 419) ; "The Birds" (B.C. 414) ; "Lysis- 
 trata " (B.C. 411);" Plutus " (B.C. 408) ; " The Frogs " (B.C. 405) ; 
 " Ecclesiazusas (B.C. 392). But Aristophanes is said to have 
 written in all fifty-four plays. His three sons, Philippus, Araros, 
 and Nicostratus, were all poets of what is called the Middle 
 Comedy; Aristophanes himself being the only one of many 
 writers of the Old Comedy of whom any complete work is left. 
 
 Frere's translations of some of the plays of Aristophanes have 
 a permanent place in English literature, and are entitled to wide 
 popularity. John Hookham Frere was not only a fine scholar, 
 but a man of genius, with wit and humour of his own, whose 
 writings are too good to be reserved for the enjoyment of a few,
 
 6 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 He was born in May 1769, of a family that had lived for some 
 time at Thwait Hall, near Finningham, in Suffolk, before it 
 changed its seat to Roydon Hall, near Diss, in Norfolk. The 
 father of John Hookham Frere was a John Frere, who was 
 second wrangler at Cambridge in 1763, when the senior wrangler 
 was William Paley. In 1768 John Frere married a lady who 
 had been unusually well educated, Jane Hookham, only child of 
 a rich London merchant ; and in the following year John Hook- 
 ham Frere was the first child of the marriage. John Frere's 
 sister, who was also a very accomplished woman, married Sir 
 John Fenn, editor of " The Paston Letters." 
 
 Hookham Frere was sent to Eton, from a school at Putney, 
 when sixteen years old ; he established there a close and life-long 
 friendship with George Canning. In November 1786, in his 
 second year at Eton, Frere was with Canning among those 
 Eton boys who started " The Microcosm," perhaps the most 
 famous of school magazines. From Eton, Frere went to Caius 
 College, Cambridge, and he was a freshman there in 1790, when 
 there appeared in Ellis's " Specimens of the Early English 
 Poets" a metrical version of the Anglo-Saxon poem on the Battle 
 of Brunanburgh, of which James Mackintosh said in his History 
 of England, " it is a double imitation, unmatched perhaps in 
 literary history, in which the writer gave an earnest of that 
 faculty of catching the peculiar genius and preserving the 
 characteristic manner of his original, which, though the specimens 
 of it be too few, places him alone among English translators." 
 Frere wrote it when at Eton. Scott spoke of it also in his 
 " Essay on Imitation of the Ancient Ballads " as the only poem 
 he had met with which, if it had been produced as ancient, 
 could not have been detected on internal evidence." Frere 
 graduated B.A. in 1792, Canning in 1793. Frere took his M.A. 
 in 1795 ; and was made a Fellow of his College. He then 
 entered the Foreign Office, and in 1796 became member for a 
 Cornish pocket borough. 
 
 In 1797 John Hookham Frere joined Canning, George Ellis, 
 and others in establishing the " Antijacobin/' and in the poetry 
 of the " Antijacobin " contributed his full share to the light 
 battery of wit with which it assailed what it took to be revolu- 
 tionary extravagances. 
 
 In 1799 Frere became Under-Secretary of State in the Foreign 
 Office, succeeding Canning, who went to the Board of Trade. 
 In October 1800 he was appointed Envoy Extraordinary and 
 Plenipotentiary to Portugal; and in September 1802 he was 
 transferred from Portugal to Spain. He remained there as 
 British Minister at Madrid till August 1804, when he was suc- 
 ceeded by the Marquis Wellesley. The Ministry at home 
 made him a Privy Councillor and gave him a pension. Walter 
 Scott's "Sir Tristrem" was published in that year 1804:
 
 INTRODUCTION. 7 
 
 Frere, who delighted in old ballad and romance, spoke with 
 admiration of it to George Ellis. Ellis reported this to Scott, 
 who replied, " Frere is so perfect a master of the ancient style 
 of composition that I would rather have his suffrage than a 
 whole synod of your vulgar antiquaries." Frere's contact with 
 Spain caused him to translate parts of the " Poem of the Cid," 
 and Southey in April 1808 wrote to Scott : " I saw Frere in 
 London, and he has promised to let me print his translations 
 from the ' Poema del Cid.' They are admirably done. Indeed, 
 I never saw anything so difficult to do, and done so excellently, 
 except your supplement to Sir Tristrem." In 1807 Frere's father 
 died, and he inherited the family estates ; his mother and an 
 unmarried sister, Susan, maintaining home for him at Roydon 
 Hall. In 1808 Hookham Frere was sent to Spain again, accre- 
 dited as British Envoy and Plenipotentiary to the Central Junta. 
 The King of Spain recognised Frere's services in critical times 
 by conferring on him a Castilian title of honour Marquez dela 
 Union. In 1809 he returned, and withdrew at the age of forty, from 
 active political life. In September 1816 he married the Dowager 
 Countess of Enroll, to whom he was strongly attached, and who 
 had, beyond beauty, wit and wisdom of her own for the appre- 
 ciation of his genius. It was she who urged him to print his 
 first part of the "Monks and Giants," as "prospectus and spe- 
 cimen of an intended national work by William and Robert 
 Whistlecraft, of Stowmarket, in Suffolk, harness and collar 
 makers, intended to comprise the most interesting particulars 
 relating to King Arthur and his Round Table." This piece of 
 pure and delightful playfulness was published in 1817. Byron 
 who recognised Frere's hand wrote of it : " Mr. Whistlecraft 
 has no greater admirer than myself. I have written a story in 
 eighty-nine stanzas in imitation of him, called ' Beppo.' " And 
 again he wrote of " Beppo " to Murray : " The style is not English, 
 it is Italian : Berni is the original of all ; Whistlecraft was my 
 immediate model." Southey afterwards wrote of poems in this 
 manner : " Frere began it ; what he produced was too good in 
 itself and too inoffensive to become popular, for it attacked 
 nothing and nobody." 
 
 In July 1820 appeared in the " Quarterly Review" an article 
 on " Aristophanes " that attracted much attention. It was 
 Frere's only contribution to the " Quarterly," and it included 
 doctrine and illustration of his own principles applied to such 
 translation. Frere had been translating Aristophanes from time 
 to time for his own pleasure and the entertainment of friends. 
 In June 1817, when Coleridge at Highgate wanted somebody 
 to meet the German poet Tieck, he wrote to Crabb Robinson : 
 " I should be most happy to make him and that admirable man 
 Mr. Frere acquainted. Their pursuits have been so similar ; 
 and to convince Mr. Tieck that he is the man among us in whom
 
 8 INTRODUCTION. 
 
 taste at its maximum has vitalized itself into productive power 
 Genius. You need only show him the incomparable translation 
 annexed to Southey's 'Cid,' and I would finish the work off by 
 Mr. Frere's Aristophanes." 
 
 In 1820 the failing health of Lady Erroll caused Frere to 
 quit England, and he settled with his wife and sister at Malta in 
 1821. His best friend, Canning, died in 1827 ; his wife died in 
 January 1831. In the November of that year, Sir Walter Scott, 
 on his way to Naples, when his life was ebbing, was affectionately 
 received by Frere at Malta. Coleridge, whom Frere held in 
 high esteem, died in 1834 ; and to Mr. Gillman, who had watched 
 over his last years, he said in his will : " As the most expressive 
 way in which I can only mark my relation to him, and in 
 remembrance of a great and good man, revered by us both, I 
 leave the manuscript volume lettered ' Arist. Manuscript Birds, 
 Acharnians, Knights,' presented to me by my dear friend and 
 patron, the Right Hon. John Hookham Frere, who, of all men 
 I have had the means of knowing during my life, appears to me 
 eminently to deserve to be characterized as 6 KoXoKayados, 6 
 ^tAo/caAoy." Frere's sister and house companion died in 1839, 
 and was buried by the side of his wife. He also was laid beside 
 her in the English burial-ground at Malta in January 1846. 
 
 The present edition of Frere's translation of " The Acharnians/' 
 ''The Knights," and " The Birds " has been printed direct from 
 copies printed for himself at Malta in 1839, an d published 
 by Pickering in 1840. "The Works of John Hookham Frere, 
 in Verse and Prose, now first collected, with a Prefatory Memoir 
 by his nephews, W. E. and Sir Bartle Frere," were published in 
 1872, in volumes of which a handsome popular edition would be 
 a delight to many readers. 
 
 H. M. 
 April 1886.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 DIC/T.OPOLIS, whose name may be interpreted as conveying the idea of 
 honest policy, is the principal character in the play. He is repre- 
 sented as a humorous, shrewd countryman (a sort of Athenian 
 Sancho), who (in consequence of the war, and the invasion of Attica 
 by the Peloponnesian army) had been driven from his house and 
 property to take shelter in the city. Here his whole thoughts are 
 occupied with regret for the comforts he has lost, and with wishes 
 for a speedy peace. The soliloquy in which he appears in the 
 first scene, represents him seated alone in the place of Assembly, 
 having risen early to secure a good place, his constant practice (he 
 says), in order "to bawl, to abuse and interrupt the speakers," with 
 the exception of those, and those only, who are arguing in favour of 
 an immediate peace. But the magistrates and men of business, 
 not having so much leisure on their hands as the worthy country- 
 man, are less punctual in their attendance, and he is kept waiting, 
 to his great discomfort ; their seats are empty, and the citizens in 
 the market-place are talking and idling, or shifting about to avoid 
 a most notable instrument of democratic coercion namely, a cord 
 coloured with ochre, which the officers stretch across the market- 
 place in order to drive the loiterers to the place of Assembly ; those 
 that are overtaken by the rope, being marked by the ochre, besides 
 the damage to their dress, becoming liable to a nominal fine. To 
 avoid the sense of weariness, he is in the habit (as he tells us), upon 
 such occasions, of giving a forced direction to his thoughts ; and lie 
 gives a sample of his mode of employing this expedient, in the very 
 first lines : he is tasking himself to recollect and sum up all the 
 things that had occurred of late either to gratify or to annoy him. 
 At length, however, he is relieved from the pursuit of this unsatis- 
 factory pastime. The magistrates arrive and take their seats the 
 place of Assembly is filled, and silence is proclaimed when a new
 
 12 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 personage enters hastily. Here we have an instance of the peculiar 
 character of invention which belongs to the ancient comedy ; in 
 which a bodily form and action is given to those images which have 
 no existence except in the forms of animated or fanciful language. 
 " If a deity were to come down among the Athenians and propose 
 to conclude a peace for them, they would not listen to him " this 
 phrase is here exhibited in action ; for the personage above men- 
 tioned is a demigod (descended immediately from Ceres herself, as 
 he proves by a very rapid and confident recitation of his genealogy), 
 but his offer of his services as a mediator are very ill received, and 
 he very narrowly escapes being taken into custody. 
 The next persons who present themselves to the Assembly are two 
 Envoys returned from a mission to the Court of Persia, which they 
 have contrived to prolong for several years. They relate all the 
 hardships which they had undergone in luxurious entertainments 
 and in tedious journeys with a splendid equipage : they moreover 
 had been detained by an unforeseen circumstance on their arrival at 
 the capital. The state of things was such as Autolycus describes : 
 "The King is not at the palace, he is gone to purge melancholy nnd 
 air himself:" but the King of Persia was not gone, like the King 
 of Bohemia, "on board a new ship ;" he was gone with a magnifi- 
 cent military retinue to the Golden Mountains, where, according to 
 the Ambassadors' report, he continued for eight months in an 
 unremitting course of cathartics. On his return to the capital, they 
 had the honour of being presented, and entertained at a most 
 singular and marvellous banquet ; finally, they had succeeded in 
 their mission, and had brought with them a confidential servant of 
 the Crown of Persia (a nobleman of high rank, though rather of a 
 suspicious name), Shamartabas, commissioned to declare His 
 Majesty's intention to the people of Athens. Shamartabas holds 
 the distinguished office nnd title of the King's Eye: of course the 
 mask which is assigned him is distinguished by an eye of enormous 
 size, the appearance of which and the gravity of gesture suited to 
 such an exalted personage excite the rustic republican spleen of 
 honest Dicaeopolis. The communications of the great Persian 
 courtier, being in his own language and consequently unintelligible, 
 are variously interpreted. Dicaeopolis takes upon himself to ques- 
 tion him peremptorily, and in the course of the examination dis- 
 covers a couple of effeminate Athenian fops, disguised as eunuchs, 
 in his train ; this discovery, however, creates no sensation. The 
 King's Eye is invited with the usual honours to a banquet in the 
 Prytaneum ; but when Dicaeopolis sees these impostors and enemies 
 of his country upon the point of being rewarded with a good dinner, 
 the indignation which is excited in his independent spirit decides at
 
 THE AC ff ARM TANS. 13 
 
 once his future destinies and the conduct of all the scenes which 
 follow. In that tone which a person is apt to employ when he 
 fancies that the zeal of his friends gives him a right to command 
 their services, he calls out very peremptorily for Amphitheus, and 
 without any preamble or prefatory request, directs him to proceed 
 to Sparta without loss of time, and to conclude a separate peace for 
 him (Dicseopolis), his wife and family, advancing to him at the same 
 time the principal sum of eight drachmas for that purpose. 
 Another Envoy now appears, returned from a Court of a different 
 description. He has not, like the former, any complaints to make 
 of having been overwhelmed with an excess of ostentation and 
 and profusion from the Grand Monarque of those times ; he has 
 resided with a sort of contemporary Czar Peter, the Autocrat of 
 Thrace, having lived (of course according to his own account) in a 
 most jolly barbarous intimacy with that rising potentate, and inspir- 
 ing him with the sincerest hearty zeal in favour of the polished state 
 of Athens. His son, the heir apparent, had been admitted by the 
 Athenians to the freedom of their city, an honour which, in their 
 opinion (as well as in that of Mr. Peter Putty in JFoote's farce), any 
 prince ought to be proud of; and the Assembly are accordingly 
 informed of the delight and enthusiasm with which the compliment 
 had been accepted. They are presented moreover with a specimen of 
 the auxiliary troops, somewhat singularly equipped, which their nesv 
 ally is willing to employ in their service, but at a rate of pay which 
 Dicseopolis exclaims against as scandalous. He has soon other 
 causes of complaint ; for attracted by the passion for garlic, which 
 it seems is predominant amongst them, the Odomantians (for that 
 is the name of the tribe to which the new warriors belong) begin 
 their operations by plundering the store which Dicseopolis had 
 provided for his own luncheon ; outrageous at this injury, after 
 reproaching the magistrates with their apathy in suffering it, he 
 takes, what it seems was an effectual mode of dissolving the 
 Assembly, by declaring that a storm is coming on, and affirming 
 that he has felt a drop of rain. This sort of Polish veto nullifies 
 the proceedings of the Assembly, which is accordingly dissolved. 
 Dicseopolis is left lamenting over the pillage of his provisions, but his 
 spirits are soon revived by the appearance of Amphitheus, who has 
 returned with samples of treaties of peace or truces. These treaties 
 or truces are typified by the wines employed in the libations by 
 which they were ratified ; a conceit, which in the language of the 
 original appears less extravagant, the Greeks having only one and 
 the same word by which they expressed the idea of a truce and 
 that of the libation by which it was rendered valid. Amphitheus is 
 in a hurry, having been (as he says) discovered nnd pursued by a
 
 i 4 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 number of old rustics of Acharme, who since the ruin of the vine- 
 yards of their village by the invading army, had become furious 
 against a peace. Dicseopolis tastes and discusses the qualities of 
 the wines, and having fixed upon a sample of thirty years' growth, 
 goes away with a determination to avail himself of the change 
 in his affairs, by keeping the Feast of Bacchus once more in his own 
 village ; while Amphitheus runs off to avoid the Acharnians whom 
 he had outrun, but who are still in quest of him. 
 
 SCENE. The Pnyx. 
 
 DIOEOPOLIS. 
 
 How many things there are to cross and vex me, 
 My comforts I compute at four precisely, 
 My griefs and miseries at a hundred thousand. 
 Let's see what there has happened to rejoice me 
 With any real kind of joyfulness ; 
 Come, in the first place I set down five talents, 
 Which Cleon vomited up again and refunded ; 
 There I rejoiced ; I loved the knights for that ; 
 'Twas nobly done, for the interests of all Greece. 
 But again I suffered cruelly in the theatre 
 A tragical disappointment There was I 
 Gaping to hear old ^Eschylus, when the Herald 
 Called out, " Theognis,* bring your chorus forward." 
 Imagine what my feelings must have been ! 
 But then Dexitheus pleased me coming forward 
 And singing his Boeotian melody : 
 But next came Chaeris with his music truly, 
 That turned me sick, and killed me very nearly. 
 But never in my lifetime, man nor boy, 
 Was I so vexed as at this present moment ; 
 To see the Pnyx, at this time of the morning, 
 Quite empty, when the Assembly should be full. 
 There are our citizens in the market-place, 
 Lounging and talking, shifting up and down 
 
 * A bad tragic poet, ridiculed in this play.
 
 THE ACHARKIANS. 15 
 
 To escape the painted twine that ought to sweep 
 
 The shoal of them this way ; not even the Presidents 
 
 Arrived they're always last, crowding and jostling 
 
 To get the foremost seat ; but as for peace 
 
 They never think about it Oh, poor country ! 
 
 As for myself, I'm always the first man. 
 
 Alone in the morning, here I take my place, 
 
 Here I contemplate, here I stretch my legs ; 
 
 I think and think I don't know what to think. 
 
 1 draw conclusions and comparisons, 
 
 I ponder, I reflect, I pick my nose, 
 
 I make a stink I make a metaphor, 
 
 I fidget about, and yawn and scratch myself; 
 
 Looking in vain to the prospect of the fields, 
 
 Loathing the city, longing for a peace, 
 
 To return to my poor village and my farm, 
 
 That never used to cry " Come buy my charcoal ! " 
 
 Nor, " Buy my oil ! " nor " Buy my anything ! " 
 
 But gave me what I wanted, freely and fairly, 
 
 Clear of all cost, with never a word of buying, 
 
 Or such buy-words. So here I'm come, resolved 
 
 To bawl, to abuse, to interrupt the speakers, 
 
 Whenever I hear a irord of any kind 
 
 Except for an immediate peace. Ah there ! 
 
 The Presidents at last ; see, there they come ! 
 
 All scrambling for their seats I told you so ! 
 
 HERALD. Move forward there ! Move forward all of ye 
 Further ! within the consecrated ground. 
 
 AMPHITHEUS. Has anybody spoke ? 
 
 HER. Is anybody 
 
 Prepared to speak ? 
 
 AMP. Yes, I. 
 
 HER. Who are you and what ? 
 
 AMP. Amphitheus the demigod. 
 
 HER. Not a man ?
 
 16 THE ACIIARNIANS. 
 
 AMP. No, I'm immortal ; for the first Amphitheus 
 Was born of Ceres and Triptolemus, 
 His only son was Keleiis, Keleiis married 
 Phsenarete my grandmother, Lykinus 
 My father, was their son ; that's proof enough 
 Of the immortality in our family. 
 The gods moreover have dispatched me here 
 Commissioned specially to arrange a peace 
 Betwixt this city and Sparta notwithstanding 
 .1 find myself rather in want at present 
 Of a little ready money for my journey. 
 The magistrates won't assist me. 
 
 HER. Constables ! 
 
 AMP. O Keleiis and Triptolemus, don't forsake me ! 
 
 Die. You Presidents, I say ! you exceed your powers ; 
 You insult the Assembly, dragging off a man 
 That offered to make terms and give us peace. 
 
 HER. Keep silence there. 
 
 Die. By Jove, but I won't be silent, 
 
 Except I hear a motion about peace. 
 
 HER. Ho there ! the Ambassadors from the King of 
 Persia. 
 
 Die. What King of Persia ? what Ambassadors ? 
 I'm sick of foreigners and foreign animals, 
 Peacocks* and coxcombs and Ambassadors. 
 
 HER. Keep silence there. 
 
 Die. What's here ? What dress is that ? 
 
 In the name of Ecbatana ! f What does it mean ? 
 
 Peacocks had been introduced at the public charge, and were exhibited 
 monthly. It is to be supposed that the exhibition had become rather 
 stale. 
 
 \ Tho name of an unknown and extraordinary place is sometimes used to 
 express wonder. In New England a thing is said to be "Jerusalem fine." 
 Flanders in the time of Philip III. served the Spaniards for a phrase of 
 wondor, " No hay mas Flandcs."
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 17 
 
 AMB. You sent us when Euthymenes was Archon, 
 Some few years back, Ambassadors to Persia, 
 With an appointment of two drachmas each 
 For daily maintenance. 
 
 Die. Alas, poor drachmas ! 
 
 AMB. 'Twas no such easy service, I can tell you, 
 No trifling inconvenience to be dragged 
 Along those dusty dull Caystrian plains, 
 Smothered with cushions in the travelling chariots, 
 Obliged to lodge at night in our pavilions, 
 Jaded and hacked to death. 
 
 Die. My service then 
 
 Was an easy one, you think ! on guard all night, 
 In the open air, at the outposts, on a mat. 
 
 AMB. . . . . At our reception we were forced to drink 
 Strong luscious wine in cups of gold and crystal .... 
 
 Die. O rock of Athens ! sure thy very stones 
 Should mutiny at such open mockery ! 
 
 AMB. [in continuation] 
 
 .... with the barbarians 'tis the test of manhood. 
 There the great drinkers are the greatest men .... 
 
 Die. As debauchees and coxcombs are with us. 
 
 AMB. [in continuation} 
 
 .... In the fourth year we reached the royal residence, 
 But found the Sovereign absent on a progress, 
 Gone with his army to the Golden Mountains, 
 To take his ease, and purge his royal person ; 
 There he remained eight months. 
 
 Die. When did he close 
 
 His course of medicine ? 
 
 AMB. With the full of the moon 
 He rose, and left his seat, returning homeward : 
 There he admitted us to an audience, 
 And entertained us at a royal banquet 
 With a service of whole oxen baked in crust.
 
 1 8 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Die. Oxen in crust ! what lies, what trumpery ! 
 Did ever any mortal hear the like? 
 
 AMB. Besides they treated us with a curious bird, 
 Much bigger than our own Cleonymus. 
 'Tis called the Chousibus. 
 
 Die. Ay, by that same token 
 
 We're choused of our two drachmas. 
 
 AMB. Finally, 
 
 We've brought you here a nobleman, Shamartabas 
 By name, by rank and office the King's Eye. 
 
 Die. God send a crow to pick it out, I say, 
 And yours the Ambassador's into the bargain ! 
 
 HER. Let the King's Eye come forward. 
 
 Die. Hercules ! 
 
 What's here ? an eye for the head of a ship ! * what point, 
 What headland is he weathering ? what's your course ? 
 What makes you steer so steadily and so slowly ? 
 
 AMB. Come now, Shamartabas, stand forth ; declare 
 The King's intentions to the Athenian people. 
 
 [SHAMARTABAS here utters some words, which Orien- 
 talists have supposed to be the common formula 
 prefixed to the edicts of the Persian Monarch 
 lartaman exarksan apissonai satra.] 
 
 * The imaginative spirit of antiquity had transformed the head of a ship 
 into the likeness of a human face ; the keel served for a nose, a painted eye 
 being inserted on each side, and a portion of the convex projections of the 
 bow was coloured red, to represent a pair of cheeks, whence the epithet 
 "red-cheeked" is applied to ships in Homer. The face thus produced was 
 appropriated to Medusa by the addition of two snakes diverging from it, 
 and running along the gunwale (according to Hipponax's description "as 
 if they were going to bite the head of the steersman"). The whole vessel 
 was thus converted into the form of a protecting amulet. It appears by 
 what Herodotus says of the oracle addressed to the Siphnians, that the 
 " red cheeks " must have gone out of fashion in his time ; but the " eye " is 
 still universal in the Mediterranean, and the writer of this note has seen the 
 snake in its proper position and direction, on the gunwale of small craft in 
 the harbour ol Valletta and in the Bay of Cadiz.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 19 
 
 AMB. You understand it ? 
 
 Die. No, by Jove, not I. 
 
 AMB. \to DiCjEOPOLis] He says the King intends to 
 
 send us gold. 
 
 \to SHAMARTABAS] Explain about the gold; speak more 
 distinctly. 
 
 SHAMARTABAS. Sen gooly Jaonau aphooly chest. 
 
 Die. Well, that's distinct enough ! 
 
 HER. What does he say ? 
 
 Die. That it's a foolish jest for the lonians 
 To imagine that the King would send them gold. 
 
 AMB. No, no ! He's telling ye of chests full of gold. 
 
 Die. What chests ? you're an impostor. Stand away, 
 Keep off; and let me alone to question him. 
 
 \to SHAMARTABAS] 
 
 You Sir, you Persian ! answer me distinctly 
 And plainly, in presence of this fist of mine ; 
 On pain of a royal purple bloody nose. 
 Will the King send us gold, or will he not ? 
 
 [SHAMARTABAS shakes his head} 
 Have our Ambassadors bamboozled us ? 
 
 [SHAMARTABAS nods\ 
 
 These fellows nod to us in the Grecian fashion ; 
 They're some of our own people, I'll be bound. 
 One of those eunuchs there I'm sure I know : 
 I'm positive it's Cleisthenes the Siburtian. 
 How durst you, you baboon, with such a beard, 
 And your designing wicked rump close shaved, 
 To pass yourself upon us for a eunuch ? 
 And who's this other ? Sure enough it's Strato ! 
 
 HER. Silence there ! Keep your seats ! 
 The Senate have invited the King's Eye 
 To feast with them in the Prytaneum. 
 
 Die. There 
 
 An't it enough to drive one mad ? to drive onp
 
 20 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 To hang himself? to be kept here in attendance, 
 Working myself into a strangury ; 
 Whilst every door flies open to these fellows. 
 But I'll do something desperate and decided. 
 Where is Amphitheus got to ? 
 
 AMP. Here am I. 
 
 Die. There Take you these eight drachmas on my 
 
 part, 
 
 And make a separate peace for me with Sparta", 
 For me, my wife and children and maidservant. 
 And you Go on with your embassies and fooleries. 
 
 HER. Theorus, our ambassador into Thrace, 
 Returned from King Sitalces ! * 
 
 THEO. Here am I. 
 
 Die. More coxcombs called for ! Here's another coming. 
 
 THEO. We should not have remained so long in 
 Thrace .... 
 
 Die. If you hadn't been overpaid I know you wouldn't. 
 
 THEO. But for the snow, which covered all the country, 
 And buried up the roads, and froze the rivers. 
 'Twas singular this change of weather happened 
 Just when Theognis here, our frosty poet, 
 Brought out his tragedy. We passed our time 
 In drinking with Sitalces. He's your friend, 
 Vour friend and lover, if there ever was one, 
 And writes the name of Athens on his walls, t 
 His son, your new-made fellow-citizen, 
 Had wished to have been enrolled in proper form 
 At the Apaturian festival ; and meanwhile, 
 During his absence, earnestly desires 
 
 * Theorus is noted in the "Wasps" as a flattering, super-civil, parasitical 
 person. See his efforts at reconciliation in the next page. 
 
 t The common practice of lovers both in ancient and modern times ; but 
 in this instance there is probably an allusion to some public monuments 
 which recorded the king's alliance with the Athenians in terms flattering to 
 tljeir national vanity.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 21 
 
 That the Apaturian sausages may be sent to him. 
 
 He is urgent with his father to befriend 
 
 His newly adopted countrymen ; and in fine 
 
 Sitalces has been so far worked upon, 
 
 He has sworn at last his solemn Thracian oath, 
 
 Standing before the sacrifice, to send 
 
 Such an army, he said, that all the Athenian people 
 
 Shall think that there's a flight of locusts coming. 
 
 Die. Then hang me if I believe a word about it, 
 Except their being locusts ; that seems likely. 
 
 THEO. And now he has sent some warriors from a tribe 
 The fiercest in all Thrace. 
 
 Die. Well, come That's fair. 
 
 HER. The Thracians that came hither with Theorus ! 
 Let them come forward ! 
 
 Die. What the plague are these ? 
 
 THEO. The Odomantian army. 
 
 Die. The Odomantians? 
 
 Thracians ? and what has brought them here from Thrace 
 So strangely equipt, disguised, and circumcised ? 
 
 THEO. These are a race of fellows, if you'd hire 'em, 
 Only at a couple of drachmas daily pay ; 
 With their light javelins, and their little bucklers, 
 They'd worry and skirmish over all Bceotia. 
 
 Die. Two drachmas for those scarecrows ! and our 
 
 seamen 
 
 What would they say to it ? left in arrears, 
 Poor fellows, that are our support and safeguard. 
 Out, out upon it ! I'm a plundered man. 
 I'm robbed and ruined here with the Odomantians. 
 They're seizing upon my garlic. 
 
 THEO. \to the THRACIANS] Oh, for shame, 
 Let the man's garlic alone. You shabby fellow, 
 You countryman, take care what you're about ; 
 Don't venture near them when they're primed with garlic.
 
 22 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Die. You magistrates, have you the face to see it, 
 With your own eyes your fellow-citizen 
 Here, in the city itself, robbed by barbarians ? 
 But I forbid the Assembly. There's a change 
 In the heaven ! I felt a drop of rain ! I'm witness ! 
 
 HER. The Thracians must withdraw, to attend again 
 The first of next month. The Assembly is closed. 
 
 Die. Lord help me, what a luncheon have I lost ! 
 But there's Amphitheus coming back from Sparta. 
 Welcome Amphitheus ! 
 
 AMP. I'm not welcome yet, 
 
 There are the Acharnians pursuing me ! 
 
 Die. How so ? 
 
 AMP. I was coming here to bring the treaties, 
 
 But a parcel of old Acharnians smelt me out, 
 Case-hardened, old, inveterate, hard-handed 
 Veterans of Marathon, hearts of oak and iron, 
 Slingers and smiters. They bawled out and bellowed : 
 " You dog, you villain ! now the vines are ruined, 
 You're come with treaties, are you ? " Then they stopped, 
 Huddling up handfuls of great slinging stones 
 In the lappets of their cloaks, and I ran off, 
 And they came driving after me pell-mell, 
 Roaring and shouting. 
 
 Die. Aye, why let them roar ! 
 
 You've brought the treaties ? 
 
 AMP. Aye, three samples of 'em ; 
 
 This here is a five years' growth, taste it and try. 
 
 Die. Don't like it ! 
 
 AMP. Eh ? 
 
 Die. Don't like it ; it won't do ; 
 
 There's an uncommon ugly twang of pitch, 
 A touch of naval armament about it. 
 
 AMP. Well, here's a ten years' growth, may suit you 
 better.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 23 
 
 Die. No, neither of them. There's a sort of sourness 
 Here in this last, a taste of acid embassies, 
 And vapid allies turning to vinegar. 
 
 AMP. But here's a truce of thirty years entire, 
 Warranted sound. 
 
 Die. O Bacchus and the Bacchanals ! 
 
 This is your sort ! here's nectar and ambrosia ! 
 Here's nothing about providing three days' rations ; 
 It says, " Do what you please, go where you will." 
 I choose it, and adopt it, and embrace it, 
 For sacrifice and for my private drinking. 
 In spite of all the Acharnians, I'm determined 
 To remove out of the reach of wars and mischief, 
 And keep the feast of Bacchus in my farm. 
 
 AMP. And I'll run off to escape from those Acharnians. 
 
 Masses of men, when in a state of excitement, whatever may be their 
 collective character or purpose, are apt to separate into two divi- 
 sions ; those of a milder and more reasonable temper taking the 
 one side, and the more ardent and intractable taking the other. This 
 is exemplified in two Semichoruses. The first are upon the point of 
 abandoning their pursuit, while the second persevere in it with 
 unabated eagerness, indefatigable and (as they afterwards show 
 themselves) implacable. The first, on the contrary, are by degrees 
 pacified and induced to listen to reason. 
 
 This difference of feeling finally produces a struggle between them, in 
 which those who are of "milder mood " obtain the advantage ; and 
 their opponents are obliged to call for assistance from Lamachus, a 
 romantic, enthusiastic military character, and, of course, as decided 
 an advocate for war as Dicseopolis (the poet's dramatic representa- 
 tive) is for peace. Lamachus appears in his gorgeous armour. 
 Dicoeopolis, under the affectation of extreme terror and simplicity, 
 contrives to banter and provoke him. Lamachus proceeds to 
 violence, and is foiled ; after which a dispute is carried on for some 
 time between them upon equal terms ; and they finally separate 
 with a declaration of their respective determinations ; the one 
 looking forward to military achievement, and the other to commer- 
 cial profit and enjoyment. 
 
 It may be necessary to say something of an attempt that has been 
 made in the translation of the following Chorus to convey to the
 
 24 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 English reader some notion of the metrical character of the original. 
 The poet himself has described the metre as bold and manly, 
 expressive of firmness and vehemence, and, as such, suitable to the 
 persons of whom his Chorus is composed. The Cretic metre (for 
 that is its name) consists of a quaver between two crotchets 
 ( ^ ), and may be considered as a truncated form of the Trochaic, 
 differing from it only by the subtraction of a short or quaver- syllable ; 
 the Trochaic itself consisting of four syllables, a crotchet and quaver 
 alternately ( ^). In consequence of this affinity, we find 
 that the two metres frequently pass into each other. 
 In the instance before us, the Chorus begins with the Trochaic, but after the 
 first four lines passes into the Cretic ; the second Cretic line exhibits 
 a variety of frequent occurrence in the Greek, the last crotchet being 
 resolved into two quavers ( --^ ^ *-*). Moreover, the altercation 
 between Dicseopolis and the Chorus is kept up for some time in 
 Trochaics and Cretics alternately. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Follow faster ! all together ! search, inquire of every one. 
 Speak, inform us, have you seen him ? Whither is the rascal 
 
 run? 
 'Tis a point of public service that the traitor should be 
 
 caught 
 In the fact, seized and arrested with the treaties that he 
 
 brought. 
 
 SEMICHORUS I. 
 
 He's escaped, he's escaped 
 Out upon it ! Out upon it ! 
 Out of sight, out of search. 
 O the sad wearisome 
 Load of years ! 
 
 . Well do I remember such a burden as I bore 
 Running with Phayllus* with a hamper at my back, 
 Out alack, 
 Years ago. 
 
 * An eminent conqueror in the foot-race at Olympia. There was 
 probably some story of his having been matched (under certain disadvan- 
 tages) ngainst an active man who had been used to run under a burden.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 25 
 
 But, alas, my sixty winters and my sad rheumatic pain 
 Break my speed and spoil my running, and that old 
 
 unlucky sprain. 
 He's escaped 
 
 SEMICHORUS II. 
 
 But we'll pursue him. Whether we be fast or slow, 
 He shall learn to dread the peril of an old Acharnian foe. 
 O Supreme Powers above, 
 Merciful Father Jove, 
 Oh, the vile miscreant wretch ; 
 How did he dare, 
 How did he presume in his unutterable villany to make a 
 
 peace, 
 
 Peace with the detestable, abominable Spartan race. 
 No, the war must not end 
 Never end till the whole Spartan tribe 
 Are reduced, trampled down, 
 Tied and bound, hand and foot. 
 
 CHOR. Now we must renew the search, pursuing at a 
 
 steady pace. 
 Soon or late we shall secure him, hunted down from place 
 
 to place. 
 Look about like eager marksmen, ready with your slings and 
 
 stones. 
 How I long to fall upon him, the villain, and to smash his 
 
 bones ! 
 
 Enter DIC^EOPOLIS, his WIFE and DAUGHTER, a 
 
 SLAVE, &c. 
 Die. Peace, Peace. 
 
 Silence, Silence. 
 CHOR. Stand aside ! Keep out of sight ! List to the 
 
 sacrificial cries ! 
 There he comes, the very fellow, going out to sacrifice.
 
 26 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Wait and watch him for a minute, we shall have him by 
 surprise. 
 
 Die. Silence ! move forward, the Canephora ; 
 You, Xanthias, follow close behind her there, 
 In a proper manner, with your pole and emblem. 
 
 WIFE. Set down the basket, daughter, and begin 
 The ceremony. 
 
 DAUGHTER. Give me the cruet, mother, 
 And let me pour it upon the holy cake. 
 
 Die. Oh, blessed Bacchus, what a joy it is 
 To go thus unmolested, undisturbed, 
 My wife, my children, and my family, 
 With our accustomed joyful ceremony, 
 To celebrate thy festival in my farm. 
 Well, here's success to the truce of thirty years. 
 
 WIFE. Mind your behaviour, child ; carry the basket 
 In a modest proper manner ; look demure 
 And grave ; a happy fellow will he be 
 That gives more than an eye to ye. Come, move on. 
 Mind your gold trinkets, they'll be stolen else. 
 
 Die. Follow behind there, Xanthias, with the pole, 
 And I'll strike up the bacchanalian chant. 
 Wife, you must be spectator ; go within, 
 And mount to the housetop to behold us pass. 
 
 Die. [Sings] 
 Leader of the revel rout, 
 Of the drunken roar and shout, 
 Crazy mirth and saucy jesting, 
 Frolic and intrigue clandestine ! 
 Half a dozen years are passed,* 
 Here we meet in peace at last. 
 
 * This comedy was produced in 425 B.C., the sixth year of the Pelopon- 
 nesian war.
 
 THE. ACHARNIANS. 27 
 
 All my wars and fights are o'er : 
 Other battles please me more, 
 
 With my neighbour's maid, the Thracian, 
 Found marauding in the wood ; 
 Seizing on the fair occasion, 
 
 With a quick retaliation 
 Making an immediate booty 
 Of her innocence and beauty. 
 If a drunken head should ache, 
 Bones and heads we never break. 
 If we quarrel overnight ; 
 At a full carousing soak, 
 In the morning all is right ; 
 And the shield hung out of sight 
 In the chimney smoke. 
 
 CHOR. That's the man. Mind your aim ; 
 Pelt away Pelt away. 
 
 Die. Heaven and Earth ! what's here to do ? You'll 
 break the pitcher, have a care ! 
 
 CHOR. We'll break your head, 
 We'll break your bones, 
 We'll pummel you to death with stones. 
 
 Die. Tell me, most serene Acharnians, wherefore, upon 
 what pretence ? 
 
 CHOR. Impudence ! Insolence ! 
 Infamous traitor, do ye dare to ask ? 
 In despite 
 
 Of duty and right, 
 Duty to the state, 
 Duty to the laws, 
 You've presumed to separate 
 Your private cause, 
 With the villainous abuse 
 Of a treasonable truce.
 
 2 S THE ACHARNIAN3. 
 
 And you dare, 
 Standing there, 
 Void of shame, void of grace, 
 To look us in the face. 
 
 Die. But my motive Once again, let me be heard, and 
 
 I'll explain. 
 
 CHOR. No reply. You shall die, 
 Stoned and buried all at once, 
 Buried in a heap of stones. 
 Die. Have patience, do ! forbear a bit ! 
 You've never heard my reasons yet 
 CHOR. We've forborne, long enough ; 
 Say no more. Trash and stuff ! 
 We detest you worse than Cleon, him that, if he gets his 
 
 dues, 
 We shall cut up into thongs to serve the knights for straps 
 
 and shoes. 
 
 We'll not hear ye ; your alliance with the worst of enemies, 
 With the wicked hated Spartans, we'll avenge it and chastise. 
 Die. Don't be talking of the Spartans; 'tis another 
 
 question wholly, 
 
 All my guilt or innocence depends upon the treaty solely. 
 CHOR. Don't imagine to cajole us with your arguments 
 
 and fetches ; 
 You confess you made a peace with those abominable 
 
 wretches. 
 Die Well, the very Spartans even, I've my doubts and 
 
 scruples whether 
 
 They've been totally to blame, in ev'ry instance, altogether. 
 CHOR. Not to blame in every instance ! Villain, vagabond, 
 
 how dare ye, 
 Talking treason to our faces, to suppose that we should 
 
 spare ye. 
 
 Die. Not so totally to blame ; and I would show that, 
 here and there,
 
 THE, ACtiARNlANS. 29 
 
 The treatment they received from us has not been abso- 
 lutely fair. 
 CHOR. What a scandal ! what an insult ! what an outrage 
 
 on the state ! 
 
 Are ye come to plead before us as the Spartans' advocate ? 
 Die. I'm prepared to plead the cause, and bring my neck 
 
 here for a pledge, 
 Placed upon the chopping-block, ready to meet the axe's 
 
 edge. 
 CHOR. Don't be standing shilly-shally, comrades, let the 
 
 traitor die. 
 Pummel him with stones to pieces, pound and maul him 
 
 utterly, 
 
 Mash the villain to a jelly, like a vat of purple dye. 
 Die. I'm astonished at your temper. Won't you give me 
 
 leave to say 
 Something in my own defence, my good Acharnians ? Hear 
 
 me, pray 1 
 
 CHOR. We're determined not to hear ye. 
 Die. That will be severe indeed. 
 
 CHOR. We're determined. 
 Die. Good Acharnians, give me time 
 
 and hear me plead. 
 
 CHOR. Death awaits you, death this instant. 
 Die. Then the quick resolve is taken. 
 
 Know that I've secured a hostage destined to redeem my 
 
 bacon.* 
 He, your homebred kindly kinsman, he with me shall live 
 
 or perish. 
 CHOR. What's the matter ? Is there any child or infant 
 
 that you cherish, 
 
 Missing here amongst you> neighbours, whom he keeps 
 confined in durance ? 
 
 * The extravagant burlesque which follows, turns upon the occupation of 
 the Acharnians as charcoal-burners.
 
 30 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 What can else inspire the man with such a confident 
 
 assurance ? 
 Die. Strike, destroy me then, while I shall act in turn 
 
 the assassin's part, 
 If the native love of charcoal moves not your obdurate 
 
 heart. 
 
 discoi'ers a hamper of charcoal, and 
 stands over it in a menacing theatrical attitude, 
 with a sword drawn.] 
 
 CHOR. O forbear 1 see there ! 
 See the poor natural Acharnian hamper of our own, 
 Ready to be overthrown. 
 Spare it, I beseech thee, spare.* 
 Die. I'll not hear ; the word is passed. Poor thing, this 
 
 instant is its last. 
 CHOR. Spare it as our only joy, 
 Our solace and employ, 
 The staff of our declining years. 
 Die. You, when I besought a hearing, armed your hands 
 
 and shut your ears. 
 CHOR. Yes, but now we'll permit, 
 We'll dispense, we'll allow 
 Your defence. 
 Our beloved 
 Darling is at stake. 
 We submit 
 Wholly for his sake. 
 
 A burlesque of some scene in a contemporary tragedy in which the 
 actors were "brought to a dead-lock." It should seem as if in the original 
 here parodied, the assailants had been kept at bay by the counter-menace 
 of destroying some royal infant in a cradle, which suggested the substitute 
 of a hamper of charcoal. In one of the existing tragedies of Euripides 
 there is an instance of a dead-lock quite as decided as the one which seems 
 to be parodied here.
 
 THE ACHARNTANS. 31 
 
 Die. Before we parley or compound, cast me those 
 pebbles to the ground. 
 
 CHOR. See there, all's fair. 
 
 But keep your word, sheath the sword. 
 
 Die. Other pebbles may be lurking in the lappets of your 
 jerkin. 
 
 CHOR. Never fear, never doubt ; 
 See them here shaken out. 
 There's none behind : only mind, 
 Keep your word, sheath the sword. 
 And here I fling stone and sling, 
 Sling and stone, both away, 
 Both in one ; both are gone. 
 
 Die. Well now, will you please to have done with your 
 
 noise and nonsense, 
 
 And fling them away, too, both. Fine work you've made, 
 A pretty business ! Look there at your hamper. 
 What a taking the poor creature has been in, 
 Voiding its coal-dust, like a cuttle-fish, 
 For very fright ; nearly destroyed, in short, 
 Merely from a want of temper and discretion 
 On the part of its own friends.* 'Tis passing strange, 
 That human nature should be so possessed 
 With a propensity to pelt and bawl ; 
 When gentle easy Reason might decide 
 All their debates with order, peace, and law ; 
 When I myself stand here resigned, and ready 
 To plead my cause before a chopping-block, 
 To vindicate the Spartans and myself. 
 Yet I, forsooth, can feel the fear of death, 
 And hold my life as dear as others do. 
 
 CHOR. Bring the block ! Bring it here ! 
 Rogue, for I long to hear 
 
 * Parody of the rhetorical style of Euripides.
 
 3 s THE ACHARN1ANS. 
 
 Speedily whatever you can have to say. 
 Speak away. 
 
 SEMICHORUS. 
 
 'Twas your own choice, your own appointed pledge. 
 Bring forth the chopping-block, and speak away. 
 
 Die. Well, there it is. See, there's the chopping-block! 
 And little I myself am the defendant. 
 Depend upon it, I'll fight manfully. 
 I'll never hug myself within my shield ; 
 I'll speak my mind, moreover, about the Spartans. 
 And yet forsooth a secret anxious fear 
 Appals me ; for I know the turn and temper 
 Of rustic natures, then delighted most 
 When from some bold declaimer, right or wrong, 
 They hear their country's praises and their own ; 
 Delighted, but deluded all the while, 
 Unconsciously bamboozled and befooled. 
 And well I know the minds of aged men, 
 And the malignant pleasure that they feel 
 In a harsh verdict or an angry vote. 
 And well I recollect my sufferings past 
 From Cleon, for my comedy last year ; * 
 And how he dragged me to the senate house, 
 And trod me down, and bellowed over me, 
 And licked me with the rough side of his tongue ; 
 And mauled me, till I scarce escaped alive, 
 All battered and bespattered and befouled. 
 Permit me, therefore, first to clothe myself 
 In a pathetical and heartrending dress. 
 
 CHOR. It's no use ! mere excuse ! 
 
 Mere pretence ! 
 Take what you will for your defence, 
 
 The Babylonians.
 
 THE ACHARNfANS. 33 
 
 Anything you think of use, 
 Even the invisible huge hobgoblin helmet 
 Of the learned Hieronymus,* if you choose. 
 I care not, I; 
 You may try 
 
 The tricks and turns of Sisyphus in the play ; f 
 We grant free leave for all, but no delay. 
 
 Die. Well, I must try then to keep up my spirits, 
 And trudge away to find Euripides. 
 Holloh ! 
 
 SERVANT, Who's there ? 
 
 Die. Euripides within? 
 
 SERV. Within, yet not within. You comprehend me ? 
 
 Die. Within and not within ! why, what do ye mean ? 
 
 SERV. I speak correctly, old sire ! his outward man 
 Is in the garret writing tragedy ; 
 While his essential being is abroad, 
 Pursuing whimsies in the world of fancy. 
 
 Die. O happy Euripides, with such a servant ; 
 So clever arid accomplished ! call him out. 
 
 SERV. It's quite impossible. 
 
 Die. But it must be done. 
 
 Positively and absolutely I must see him ; 
 Or I must stand here, rapping at the door. 
 Euripides ! Euripides ! come down, 
 If ever you came down in all your life ! 
 'Tis I, 'tis Dicseopolis from Chollidae.t 
 ) EUR. I'm not at leisure to come down. 
 
 Die. Perhaps 
 
 But here's the scene-shifter can wheel you round. 
 
 . * A lyrical and tragic poet particularly studious of the terrific, 
 f This play is lost, but Sisyphus had been represented in old poetic 
 legends as so artful a person, that he had persuaded Proserpine to consent 
 to his release from the infernal regions. 
 
 t A mark of rusticity. Dicaeopolis mentions his demus in addition to 
 his name. 
 
 B
 
 34 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 EUR. It cannot be. 
 
 Die. But however, notwithstanding. 
 
 EUR. Well, there then I'm wheeled round ; for I had not 
 
 time 
 For coming down. 
 
 Die. Euripides, I say ! 
 
 EUR. What say ye ? 
 
 Die. Euripides ! Euripides ! 
 
 Good lawk, you're there ! upstairs ! you write upstairs, 
 Instead of the ground- floor ? always upstairs. 
 Well now, that's odd ! But, dear Euripides, 
 If you had but a suit of rags that you could lend me. 
 You're he that brings out cripples in your tragedies ; 
 A'nt ye ? You're the new poet, he that writes 
 Those characters of beggars and blind people. 
 Well, dear Euripides, if you could but lend me 
 A suit of tatters from a cast-off tragedy. 
 For mercy's sake, for I'm obliged to make 
 A speech in my own defence before the Chorus, 
 A long pathetic speech this very day ; 
 And if it fails, the doom of death betides me. 
 
 EUR. Say, what do ye seek ? is it the woeful garb 
 In which the wretched aged (Eneus acted ? 
 
 Die. No, 'twas a wretcheder man than (Eneus, much.* 
 
 EUR. Was it blind Phoenix? 
 
 Die. No, not Phoenix, no, 
 
 A fellow a great deal wretcheder than Phoenix. 
 
 EUR. 1 wonder what he wants ; is it the rags 
 Which Philoctetes went a begging with ? 
 
 Die. No, 'twas a beggar worse than Philoctetes. 
 
 EUR, Say, would you wish to wear those loathly weeds, 
 The habiliments of lame Bellerophon ? 
 
 This and the names which follow refer to personages in those dramas 
 of Euripides in which his object had been (what in poetry, as in real life, is 
 the meanest of all), to excite compassion.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 35 
 
 Die. 'Twas not Bellerophon, but very like him. 
 A kind of a smooth, fine spoken character ; 
 A beggar into the bargain and a cripple, 
 With a grand command of words, bothering and begging. 
 
 EUR. I know your man; 'tis Telephus the Mysian. 
 
 Die. Ah, Telephus ! Yes, Telephus ! do, pray, 
 Give me the things he wore. 
 
 EUR. Go fetch them there. 
 
 You'll find 'em next to the tatters of Thyestes, 
 Just over Ino's. Take them, there, and welcome. 
 
 Die. O Jupiter, what an infinite endless mass 
 Of eternal holes and patches ! Here it is, 
 Here's wherewithal to clothe myself in misery. 
 Euripides, now, since you've gone so far, 
 Do give me the other articles besides 
 Belonging to these rags, that suit with them, 
 With a little Mysian bonnet for my head. 
 For I must wear a beggar's garb to-day, 
 Yet be myself in spite of my disguise ; 
 That the audience all may know me ; but the Chorus, 
 Poor creatures, must not have the least suspicion 
 Whilst I cajole them with my rhetoric. 
 
 EUR. I'll give it you ; your scheme is excellent, 
 Deep, subtle, natural, a profound device. 
 
 Die. " May the heavens reward you ; and as to 
 
 Telephus,* 
 
 May they decide his destiny as I wish ! " 
 Why, bless me, I'm quite inspired (I think) with phrases. 
 I shall want the beggar's staff, though, notwithstanding. 
 
 EUR. Here, take it, and depart forth from the palace. 
 
 Die. O my poor heart ! much hardship hast thou borne, 
 And must abide new sorrows even now, 
 
 In the play which is here burlesqued, Telephus had been speaking in 
 an assumed character, and had appeared, with a similar ambiguous form, 
 to be imprecating evil upon himself. 
 
 B 3
 
 36 THE ACHARNlANS. 
 
 Driven hence in want of various articles. 
 
 Subdue thy nature to necessity, 
 
 Be supple, smooth, importunate, and bend 
 
 Thy temper to the level of thy fortune. 
 
 Yet grant me another boon, Euripides ; 
 
 A little tiny basket let it be, 
 
 One that has held a lamp, all burnt and battered. 
 
 EUR. Why should you need it ? 
 
 Die. Tis no need, perhaps, 
 
 But strong desire, a longing, eager wish. 
 
 EUR. You're troublesome. Depart. 
 
 Die. Alas, alas ! 
 
 Yet may you prosper like your noble mother.* 
 
 EUR. Depart, I say. 
 
 Die. Don't say so ! Give me first, 
 
 First give me a pipkin broken at the brim, 
 
 EUR. You're troublesome in the mansion. Take it, go ! 
 
 Die Alas, you know not what I feel, Euripides. 
 Yet grant me a pitcher, good Euripides ; 
 A pitcher with a sponge plugged in its mouth. 
 
 EUR. Fellow, you'll plunder me a whole tragedy. 
 Take it, and go. 
 
 Die. Yes ; aye forsooth, I'm going. 
 
 But how shall I contrive ? There's something more 
 That makes or mars my fortune utterly ; 
 Yet give them, and bid me go, my dear Euripides ; 
 A little bundle of leaves to line my basket. 
 
 EUR. For mercy's sake ! . . . . But take them. There 
 
 they go ! 
 My tragedies and all ! ruined and robbed ! 
 
 Die. No more ; I mean to trouble you no more. 
 Yes, I retire ; in truth I feel myself 
 Importunate, intruding on the presence 
 
 * His mother was of very low condition.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Of chiefs and princes, odious and unwelcome. 
 
 But out, alas, that I should so forget 
 
 The very point on which my fortune turns ; 
 
 I wish I may be hanged, my dear Euripides, 
 
 If ever I trouble you for anything, 
 
 Except one little, little, little boon, 
 
 A single lettuce from your mother's stall. 
 
 EUR. This stranger taunts us. Close the palace gate. 
 
 Die. O my poor soul, endure it and depart, 
 And take thy sorrowful leave, without a lettuce. 
 Yet, knowest thou yet the race which must be run, 
 Pleading the cause of Sparta : and here you stand 
 Even at the goal ; time urges, arm yourself ! 
 Infuse the spirit of Euripides, 
 His quirks and quibbles, in thine inmost heart ! 
 'Tis well. Now forward, even to the place 
 Where thou must pledge thy life, and plead the cause 
 As may befall thee. Forward, forward yet ; 
 A little more. I'm dreadfully out of spirits. 
 
 SEMICHORUS II.* 
 
 Speak, or are ye dumb, 
 
 Thou rogue in grain, 
 
 Iron brain 1 
 
 Heart of stone t 
 Villain, are ye come, 
 
 Venturing your head alone, 
 
 Singly to support a treason of your own. 
 
 SEMICHORUS I. 
 
 He's resolved, 
 Confident, 
 Firm in his intent, 
 
 * See p. 23, for the characters of the two Semichorusesi
 
 38 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Ready to the day. 
 Well, my man ! 
 Since that's your plan, 
 Speak away ! 
 
 [In the following lines there is an intentional imi- 
 tation of the dry drawling style of EURIPIDES' 
 harangues .] 
 
 Die. Be not surprised, most excellent spectators, 
 If I that am a beggar, have presumed 
 To claim an audience upon public matters, 
 Even in a comedy ; for comedy 
 Is conversant in all the rules of justice, 
 And can distinguish betwixt right and wrong. 
 
 The words I speak are bold, but just and true. 
 Cleon, at least, cannot accuse me now, 
 That I defame the city before strangers. 
 For this is the Lenaean festival, 
 And here we meet, all by ourselves alone ; 
 No deputies are arrived as yet with tribute, 
 No strangers or allies ; but here we sit 
 A chosen sample, clean as sifted corn, 
 With our own denizens as a kind of chaff. 
 
 First, I detest the Spartans most extremely ; 
 And wish, that Neptune, the Taenarian deity, 
 Would bury them in their houses with his earthquakes. 
 For I've had losses losses, let me tell ye, 
 Like other people ; vines cut down and injured. 
 But, among friends (for only friends are here), 
 Why should we blame the Spartans for all this ? 
 For people of ours, some people of our own, 
 Some people from amongst us here, I mean ; 
 But not the people (pray remember that) ; 
 I never said the people but a pack 
 Of paltry people, mere pretended citizens, 
 Base counterfeits, went laying informations,
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 39 
 
 And making a confiscation of the jerkins 
 Imported here from Megara ; pigs moreover, 
 Pumpkins, and pecks of salt, and ropes of onions, 
 Were voted to be merchandise from Megara, 
 Denounced, and seized, and sold upon the spot. 
 
 Well, these might pass, as petty local matters. 
 But now, behold, some doughty drunken youths 
 Kidnap, and carry away from Megara, 
 The courtesan Simsetha, Those of Megara, 
 In hot retaliation, seize a brace 
 Of equal strumpets, hurried force perforce 
 From Dame Aspasia's house of recreation. 
 So this was the beginning of the war, 
 All over Greece, owing to these three strumpets. 
 For Pericles, like an Olympian Jove, 
 With all his thunder and his thunderbolts, 
 Began to storm and lighten dreadfully, 
 Alarming all the neighbourhood of Greece ; 
 And made decrees, drawn up like drinking songs, 
 In which it was enacted and concluded, 
 That the Megarians should remain excluded 
 From every place where commerce was transacted, - 
 With all their ware like " old care " in the ballad : 
 And this decree, by land and sea, was valid.* 
 
 Then the Megarians, being all half starved, 
 Desired the Spartans, to desire of us, 
 Just to repeal those laws ; the laws I mentioned, 
 Occasioned by the stealing of those strumpets. 
 And so they begged and prayed us several times ; 
 And we refused ; and so they went to war. 
 You'll say, " They should not." Why, what should they 
 have done ? 
 
 * The rhymes in the text are intentional. The Scholiast tells us that the 
 original contains an allusion to the words of a well-known drinking song.
 
 40 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Just make it your own case ; suppose the Spartans 
 
 Had manned a boat, and landed on your islands, 
 
 And stolen a pug puppy from Seriphos ; 
 
 Would you then have remained at home inglorious? 
 
 Not so, by no means ; at the first report, 
 
 You would have launched at once three hundred galleys, 
 
 And filled the city with the noise of troops ; 
 
 And crews of ships, crowding and clamouring 
 
 About the muster-masters and pay-masters ; 
 
 With measuring corn out at the magazine, 
 
 And all the porch choked with the multitude ; 
 
 With figures of Minerva, newly furbished, 
 
 Painted and gilt, parading in the streets ; 
 
 With wineskins, kegs, and firkins, leeks and onions ; 
 
 With garlic crammed in pouches, nets, and pokes ; 
 
 With garlands, singing girls, and bloody noses. 
 
 Our arsenal would have sounded and resounded 
 
 With bangs and thwacks of driving bolts and nails ; 
 
 With shaping oars, and holes to put the oar in ; 
 
 With hacking, hammering, clattering, and boring ; 
 
 Words of command, whistles and pipes and fifes. 
 
 " Such would have been your conduct. Will you say, 
 That Telephus should have acted otherwise ? " 
 
 2ND SEMICH. Really! is it come to that? You rogue, 
 
 how dare ye, 
 
 A beggar, here to come abusing us, 
 Slandering us all, inveighing against informers ? 
 
 IST SEMICH. By Jove, but it's all true ; truth, every 
 
 word ; 
 All true ; not aggravated in the least. 
 
 ZND SEMICH. And if it is, what right has he to say so ? 
 None in the world ; and he shall suffer for it. 
 
 IST SEMICH. Hands off there ! what are ye after? Leave 
 
 him go ! 
 I'll grapple ye else, and heave ye neck and crop.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 41 
 
 2ND SEMICH. Lamachus ! Lamachus ! 
 Lamaclms arise! 
 Let the gaze, 
 i Of thine eyes, 
 
 In a blaze, 
 
 Daunt and amaze 
 Thine enemies. 
 Bring along 
 
 All the throng, 
 
 Hardy comrades, bold and strong, 
 For assault or standing fight ; 
 Hasten and assist the right. 
 LAMACHUS. Whence came that nbise of battle on mine 
 
 ears? 
 
 Where am I summoned ? whither must I rush ? 
 To the rescue or assault ? what angry shout 
 Houses the slumbering Gorgon on my shield ? 
 
 Die. O Lamachus, with your glorious crests and con- 
 quests! 
 
 2ND SEMICH. O Lamachus ! if there an't this fellow here 
 Abusing us and all the State this long while 
 
 LAM. How dare ye, sirrah, a beggar to talk thus ? 
 Die. O mighty Lamachus, have mercy upon me, 
 If, being a beggar, I prated and spoke amiss. 
 
 LAM. What were your words ? repeat them, can't ye ? 
 Die. I can't. 
 
 I can't remember ; I'm so terrified. 
 The terror of that crest quite turned me dizzy ; 
 Do take the hobgoblin away from me, I beseech you. 
 LAM. There then. 
 
 Die. Now turn it upside down. 
 
 LAM. See there. 
 
 Die. Now give me one of the feathers. 
 LAM. Here, this plume. 
 
 Take it.
 
 42 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Die. Now clasp your hands across my forehead, 
 For I feel that I shall strain in vomiting. 
 Those crests turned me so sick ! 
 
 LAM. What are you doing ? 
 
 You varlet, would you use my plume for a vomit ? 
 
 Die. A plume, do you call it ? What does it belong to ? 
 
 LAM. To a bird 
 
 Die. To a cock lorrel, does it not ? 
 
 LAM. Ah, you shall die. [A scuffle, in which LAMACHUS 
 is foiled.} 
 
 DIG No, Lamachus, not so fast. 
 
 That's rather a point above you, stout as you are. 
 
 LAM. Is this the sort of language for a beggar 
 To use to a commander such as me ? 
 
 Die. A beggar am I ? 
 
 LAM. Why, what else are you ? 
 
 Die. I'll tell ye ! an honest man ; that's what I am. 
 A citizen that has served his time in the army, 
 As a foot soldier, fairly ; not like you, 
 Pilfering, and drawing pay, with a pack of foreigners. 
 
 LAM. They voted me a command. 
 
 Die. Who voted it ? 
 
 A parcel of cuckoos ! Well, I've made my peace. 
 In short, I could not abide the thing, not I ; 
 To see grey-headed men serve in the ranks, 
 And lads like you despatched upon commissions; 
 Some skulking away to Thrace, with their three drachmas ; 
 Tisamenus's, Chares's, and Geres's, 
 Cheats, coxcombs, vagabonds, and Phaenippus's, 
 And Theodorus's sent off to Gela,* 
 And Catana, and Camarina, and the Catamountains. 
 
 The Scholiast mentions all these persons as disreputable intriguers. 
 The Athenians were already extending their views to Sicily.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 43 
 
 LAM. It passed by a vote. 
 
 Die. But what's the reason, pray, 
 
 For you to be sent out with salaries always, 
 And none of these good people ? You, Marilades,* 
 Have you been ever sent on an embassy ? 
 You're old enough. He shakes his head. Not he ! 
 Yet he's a hard-working steady sober man. 
 And you, Euphorides, Prinides,* and the rest, 
 Have you ever been out into Chaonia, 
 Or up to Ecbatana ? no, not one of ye. 
 But Megacles, and Lamachus, and such like, 
 That, with their debts and payments long since due,t 
 Have heard their friends insisting and repeating, 
 "Get off," "Keep out of the way;" like the huswife's 
 
 warning, 
 That empties a nuisance into the street at night. 
 
 LAM. And must we bear all this, in the name of 
 democracy? 
 
 Die. Yes, just as long as Lamachus draws his salary. 
 
 LAM. No matter ! Henceforth I devote myself 
 Against the Peloponnesians, whilst I live, 
 To assault and harass them by land and sea. 
 
 Die. And I proclaim for all the Peloponnesians 
 And Thebans and Megarians, a free market ; 
 Where they may trade with me, but not with Lamachus. 
 
 The Parabasis, in which the Chorus was brought forward to speak in 
 praise or defence of the author, was a portion of the primitive 
 satirical undramatic comedy. In the times of the ancient or (as we 
 should call it, from the name of the only author whose remains 
 have reached us) the Aristophanic comedy, it seems to have been 
 regarded as nearly superfluous ; and is seldom introduced without 
 some alleged motive, as in the instance before us ; sometimes a 
 burlesque one, as in "The Peace." 
 
 * Names allusive to their occupation as charcoal-burners, 
 t Monthly payments to their club.
 
 44 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 The present, which is the oldest of the existing plays of Aristophanes, 
 was, as he tells us, the first in which he had introduced a Parabasis. 
 Since his alleged, and probably his real, motive was the circum- 
 stance to which he had already alluded when speaking in the 
 assumed character of Diceeopolis, he had reverted to his 
 
 "sufferings past 
 From Cleon, for my comedy last year" (p. 32). 
 
 This comedy ("The Babylonians ") seems, as far as we can judge of it 
 from the few fragments that remain, to have been intended, in the 
 first place, as an exposure of existing malpractices and abuses, and, 
 secondly, as a reductio ad absurdum of the extravagant schemes of 
 Athenian ambition ; assuming them to be realized, and exhibiting 
 the result. 
 
 The progressive aggrandizement of Athens had been marked, from the 
 beginning, by the extortion and oppression practised (with a few 
 honourable exceptions) by her military commanders ; Themistocles 
 himself having set the first example. In process of time, as the 
 inferior allied States became gradually subject to the more imme- 
 diate dominion of Athens, they became exposed to the additional 
 pest of professional informers and venal demagogues, subsisting or 
 enriching themselves by extortion and bribery. This state of things, 
 odious and offensive to the whole Grecian race, disgraceful to the 
 Athenian people, and profitable only to the most worthless and un- 
 principled among them, was the final unsatisfactory result of their 
 vast efforts and indefatigable activity during two generations, the con- 
 summation of the ambitious projects of the most able statesmen of a 
 former age. Meanwhile, at the time when this play ("The Baby- 
 lonians ") was produced, the same scandals and abuses continued to 
 be perpetrated in the subject States, under the cover of the Athenian 
 supremacy ; while the avidity for further conquest and dominion 
 still remained predominant in the minds of the Athenian people. 
 
 The poet then, in the fervour of youthful patriotism and the pride of 
 conscious genius ; not as he was soon afterwards tempted to become 
 and to constitute himself, a professional playwright, the poetical 
 serf of the community ;* but with the option of active life still open 
 before him, comparatively therefore independent of his audience, 
 and confident in his own wit and courage as a defence against the 
 resentment of the most powerful opponents ; had ventured an 
 appeal to the Athenian people against their whole system of 
 imperial policy both internal and external, against the grievances 
 
 These inferences are distinctly deducible from the Parabasis of "The 
 Knights."
 
 V THE ACHARNTANS. 45 
 
 which they authorized or overlooked, and against their insatiable 
 avidity for empire, tending, if attainable, in its unavoidable results, 
 to the wider extension and aggravation of a system of abuses 
 disgraceful to the name and character of the Athenian people. 
 
 With this view therefore, taking for his canvas an imaginary empire, 
 extending to the furthest limits to which the wildest ambition of 
 his countrymen would have aspired, he had transferred to its remote 
 localities the practices of the most notorious Athenian characters, 
 and the most flagrant instances of existing oppression and corrup- 
 tion. The demagogues and informers of Athens (under this sup- 
 posed unlimited extension of Athenian supremacy) were represented 
 as transacting business on a larger scale, and extending to the 
 richest and most distant regions of the East the practices which had 
 hitherto been limited to the islands of the Archipelago and the 
 shores of Asia Minor. 
 
 The poet, however, must have been aware that he had undertaken a 
 task of extreme difficulty and hazard ; one in which, more than in 
 any other theatrical attempt, it was necessary for him, at the first 
 outset, to secure the sympathy of his audience ; or, more properly 
 speaking, to excite an antipathy against the objects of his attack, 
 similar to that by which he himself was animated. It seems proba- 
 ble, therefore, that the order of subjects in the comedy must have 
 been the same as that which is observable in the Parabasis which 
 follows, and which may be considered as an apologetical analysis of 
 the preceding play. It had begun then with the least criminal 
 perhaps, but to the feelings of the Athenians the most invidious and 
 irritating topic of accusation namely, the occasional instances of 
 undue* advantages obtained for a subject State, by the hired agency 
 of Athenian statesmen and orators, co-operating with the panegyrical 
 cajolery of its deputies and envoys. A fragment has been preserved, 
 evidently belonging to what was called a " long rhesis," a narrative 
 speech, in which a character of this kind is making a triumphant 
 report to his employers ; describing his success in captivating the 
 attention of an Athenian auditory, and giving a ridiculous picture 
 of the effect which his oratory had produced upon them. 
 Then every soul of them sat open-mouth'd, 
 Like roasted oysters, gaping in a row.* 
 
 But the general plan of the play must have included a picture of the 
 abuses and insolence, under which the subject States were suffering ; 
 an exhibition of the processes of extortion and intimidation which 
 
 * Ap. Athen.p. 86. Compare this with " Knights," v. 651, and the whole 
 passage to which it belongs.
 
 46 THE ACHARXIANS. 
 
 were practised upon them ; an exposure of the persons most 
 notoriously guilty of such practices, and probably also of some 
 flagrant instances which were known to have occurretl, and which 
 might have been represented on the stage with no other disguise 
 than that of a remote fanciful locality assigned to them in the new 
 imaginary universal Empire of the Athenian Commonwealth. 
 This must have been the service, which, as he says, had excited the 
 grateful feelings of the subject States, and their just admiration of 
 the courage of the man "who had risked the perilous enterprise of 
 pleading in behalf of justice, in presence of an Athenian auditory." 
 It is observable that the poet, after having, with a just feeling of 
 pride and self-estimation, ventured in this way to assert his own 
 merits, immediately after, as if alarmed at his own boldness (like 
 Rabelais or the jesters in Shakespeare, when they are appre- 
 hensive of having touched upon too tender a point) make* a sudden 
 escape from the subject, and hurries off into a strain of transcen- 
 dental nonsense, about the high consideration with which his 
 character and services to the country were regarded by the Persian 
 monarch, and how the Spartans insisted upon obtaining the island 
 of jEgina, from no other motive than a wish to deprive the Athe- 
 nians of the advantage which they might derive from his poetical 
 admonitions. 
 
 PARABASIS OF THE CHORUS. 
 
 Our poet has never as yet 
 
 Esteemed it proper or fit, 
 
 To detain you with a long 
 
 Encomiastic song, 
 
 On his own superior wit. 
 
 But being abused and accused, 
 
 And attacked of late, 
 
 As a foe to the State, 
 
 He makes an appeal in his proper defence 
 
 To your voluble humour and temper and sense, 
 
 With the following plea ; 
 
 Namely, that he 
 Never attempted or ever meant 
 
 To scandalize 
 
 In any wise
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Your mighty imperial government. 
 
 Moreover he says, 
 
 That in various ways 
 
 He presumes to have merited honour and praise, 
 Exhorting you still to stick to your rights, 
 And no more to be fooled with rhetorical flights; 
 
 Such as of late each envoy tries 
 
 On the behalf of your allies, 
 That come to plead their cause before ye, 
 With fulsome phrase, and a foolish story 
 Of violet crowns and Athenian glory ; 
 With sumptuous Athens at every word ; 
 Sumptuous Athens is always heard, 
 Sumptuous ever; a suitable phrase 
 For a dish of meat or a beast at graze. 
 He therefore affirms, 
 In confident terms, 
 
 That his active courage and earnest zeal 
 Have usefully served your common weal : 
 He has openly shown 
 The style and tone 
 Of your democracy ruling abroad. 
 He has placed its practices on record ; 
 The tyrannical arts, the knavish tricks, 
 That poison all your politics. 
 
 Therefore we shall see, this year, 
 The allies with tribute arriving here, 
 Eager and anxious all to behold 
 Their steady protector, the bard so bold : 
 The bard, they say, that has dared to speak, 
 To attack the strong, to defend the weak. 
 His fame in foreign climes is heard, 
 And a singular instance lately occurred. 
 It occurred in the case of the Persian king, 
 Sifting and cross-examining 
 
 47
 
 48 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 The Spartan envoys. He demanded 
 
 Which of the rival States commanded 
 
 The Grecian seas ? He asked them next 
 
 (Wishing to see them more perplexed), 
 
 Which of the two contending powers 
 
 Was chiefly abused by this bard of ours ? 
 
 For he said, " Such a bold, so profound an adviser 
 
 By dint of abuse would render them wiser, 
 
 More active and able ; and briefly that they 
 
 Must finally prosper and carry the day." 
 
 Now mark the Lacedaemonian guile ! 
 
 Demanding an insignificant isle ! 
 
 " ^Egina," they say, " for a pledge of peace, 
 
 As a means to make all jealousy cease." 
 
 Meanwhile their privy design and plan 
 
 Is solely to gain this marvellous man 
 
 Knowing his influence on your fate- 
 By obtaining a hold on his estate 
 
 Situate in the isle aforesaid. 
 
 Therefore there needs to be no more said. 
 
 You know their intention, and know that you know it. 
 
 You'll keep to your island, and stick to the poet. 
 
 And he for his part 
 
 Will practise his art 
 
 With a patriot heart, 
 
 With the honest views 
 
 That he now pursues, 
 
 And fair buffoonery and abuse ; 
 
 Not rashly bespattering, or basely beflattering, 
 
 Not pimping, or puffing, or acting the ruffian ; 
 
 Not sneaking or fawning ; 
 
 But openly scorning 
 
 All menace and warning, 
 
 All bribes and suborning : 
 
 He will do his endeavour on your behalf;
 
 1HE ACtiARMAMS. 49 
 
 He will teach you to think, he will teach you to laugh. 
 
 So Cleon again and again may try ; 
 
 I value him not, nor fear him, I ! 
 
 His rage and rhetoric I defy. 
 
 His impudence, his politics, 
 
 His dirty designs, his rascally tricks 
 
 No stain of abuse on me shall fix. 
 
 Justice and right, in his despite, 
 
 Shall aid and attend me, and do me right : 
 
 With these to friend, I ne'er will bend, 
 
 Nor descend 
 
 To an humble tone 
 
 "(Like his own), 
 
 As a sneaking loon, 
 
 A knavish, slavish, poor poltroon. 
 
 STROPHE. 
 
 Muse of old 
 
 Many times, 
 Strike the bold 
 
 Hearty rhymes, 
 New revived 
 
 Firm energetical 
 Music of Acharnse ; 
 
 Choleric, fiery, quick, 
 As the sparkle 
 From the charcoal, 
 Of the native evergreen 
 
 Knotted oak, 
 
 In the smoke 
 Shows his active fiery spleen. 
 
 Whilst beside 
 
 Stands the dish 
 
 Full of fish 
 Ready to be fried :
 
 5 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Every face, in the place, 
 Overjoyed, all employed, 
 
 Junketing apace. 
 Muse then, as a friend of all, 
 Hasten, and attend the call. 
 Give an ear 
 
 To your old, 
 
 Lusty, bold 
 Townsman here. 
 
 EPIRREMA. 
 
 We, the veterans of the city, briefly must expostulate 
 At the hard ungrateful usage which we meet with from the 
 
 State, 
 Suffering men of years and service at your bar to stand 
 
 indicted, 
 Bullied by your beardless speakers, worried and perplexed 
 
 and frighted ; 
 Aided only by their staff, the staff on which their steps are 
 
 stayed ; 
 
 Old, and impotent, and empty ; deaf, decrepit, and decayed. 
 There they stand, and pore, and drivel, with a misty pur- 
 blind gleam, 
 
 Scarce discerning the tribunal, in a kind of waking dream. 
 Then the stripling, their accuser, fresh from training, bold 
 
 and quick, 
 Pleads in person, fencing, sparring, using every turn and 
 
 trick ; 
 Grappling with the feeble culprit, dragging him to dangerous 
 
 ground, 
 
 Into pitfalls of dilemmas, to perplex him and confound. 
 Then the wretched invalid attempts an answer, and at last, 
 After stammering and mumbling, goes away condemned 
 
 and cast ; 
 Moaning to his friends and neighbours, " All the little store 
 
 I have,
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 51 
 
 All is gone ! my purchase-money for a coffin and my 
 grave." 
 
 ANTISTROPHE. 
 
 Scandalous and a shame it is, 
 
 Seen or told ; 
 Scandalous and a shame to see, 
 
 A warrior old : 
 Crippled in the war, 
 Worried at the bar ; 
 Him, the veteran, that of old 
 
 Firmly stood, 
 
 With a fierce and hardy frown, 
 In the field of Marathon ; 
 
 Running down 
 
 Sweat and blood. 
 There and then, we were men ; 
 Valorous assailants ; now 
 
 Poor and low ; 
 Open and exposed to wrong, 
 
 From the young ; 
 Every knave, every ass, 
 Every rogue like Marpsyas.* 
 
 The Thucydides mentioned in the following lines is not the historian 
 (the son of Olorus), but a much older man, and in his time of much 
 greater personal eminence. In the scanty historical notices which 
 have reached us respecting the period in which he lived, he is dis- 
 tinguished from others of the same name, as the son of Milesius ; 
 and it should seem that he must have succeeded to Cimon, as the 
 leader of an unavailing opposition to that system of innovation in 
 domestic and foreign policy which Pericles introduced, and by which 
 he secured for himself, at the expense of posterity, a life annuity of 
 power and popularity. 
 
 A very characteristic anecdote is alluded to in the seventh and eighth 
 lines. Thucydides had been asked " which of the two (himself or 
 
 t 
 
 * Not known in history, but said by the Scholiast to have been noted by 
 the contemporary comic poets as a troublesome contentious orator.
 
 52 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Pericles) was the best wrestler," i.e., the best debater. To which 
 he answered, " I am the best wrestler ; but when I have flung him 
 he starts up again and persuades the people that he was not thrown 
 down." 
 
 ANTEPIRREMA. 
 
 Shame and grief it was to witness poor Thucydides's fate, 
 Indicted by Cephisodemus,* overwhelmed with words and 
 
 prate. 
 
 I myself when I beheld him, an old statesman of the city, 
 Dragged and held by Scythian archers,f I was moved to 
 
 tears and pity, 
 Him that I remember once tremendous, terrible, and 
 
 loud; 
 Discomfiting the Scythian host, subduing the revolted 
 
 crowd ; 
 Undaunted, desperate, and bold, that with his hasty grasp 
 
 could fling 
 A dozen, in as many casts, of the best wrestlers in the 
 
 ring. 
 Three thousand archers of the guard, he bawled and roared 
 
 and bore them down. 
 No living soul he feared or spared, or friends or kinsmen of 
 
 his own. 
 
 Since you then refuse to suffer aged men to rest in peace, 
 Range your criminals in classes, let the present method 
 
 cease. 
 Give up elderly delinquents to be mumbled, mouthed, and 
 
 wrung i 
 
 By the toothless old accusers ; but protect them from the 
 
 young. 
 
 An orator famous, or rather infamous, as a bold and dangerous accuser. 
 
 t These were purchased slaves, the property of the State, employed by 
 the magistrates as a police guard : see Thesm. v. 1001. They were also 
 employed to maintain order in the public assembly, and to force disorderly 
 speakers to descend from the bema. This part of their duties is alluded to 
 e sewhere : sec Eccles. v. 143, 258.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 53 
 
 For the younger class of culprits young accusers will be 
 
 fair, 
 
 Prating prostituted fops, and Clinias's son and heir. 
 Thus we may proceed in order, all of us, with all our 
 
 might, 
 Severally, both youths and elders, to defend and to indict, 
 
 DIC/EOPOLIS, 
 
 Well, there's the boundary of my market-place, 
 
 Marked out, for the Peloponnesians and Boeotians 
 
 And the Megarians. All are freely welcome 
 
 To traffic and sell with me, but not with Lamachus. 
 
 Moreover I've appointed constables, 
 
 With lawful and sufficient straps and thongs, 
 
 To keep the peace, and to coerce and punish 
 
 All spies and vagabonds and informing people. 
 
 Come, now for the column, with the terms of peace 
 
 Inscribed upon it ! I must fetch it out, 
 
 And fix it here in the centre of rny market. [Exit. 
 
 A writer in the Quarterly Reviav for July 1820 (not a very different 
 person from the writer of this note) adduces the two scenes imme- 
 diately following, as instances, amongst others, of that tendency to 
 generalization which, as he contends, was no less predominant in the 
 mind of Aristophanes than in that of Shakespeare. 
 
 In reference to this principle it is observed of the following scenes, that 
 " the two country people who are introduced as attending Dicseo- 
 polis's market, are not merely a Megarian and a Theban distin- 
 guished by a difference of dialect and behaviour ; they are the two 
 extremes of rustic character the one (the Megarian) depressed by 
 indigenct into meanness, is shifting and selfish, with habits of coarse 
 fraud and vulgar jocularity. The Theban is the direct opposite a 
 primitive, hearty, frank, unsuspicious, easy-minded fellow ; he comes 
 to market with his followers, in a kind of old-fashioned rustic triumph, 
 with his bag-pipers attending him : Dicaeopolis (the Athenian, the 
 medium between the two extremes before described) immediately 
 exhibits his superior refinement, by suppressing their minstrelsy ; and 
 the honest Theban, instead of being offended, joins in condemning 
 them. He then displays his wares, and the Athenian, with a bur-
 
 54 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 lesque tragical rant, takes one of his bist articles (a Copaic eel) and 
 delivers it to his own attendants to be conveyed within doors. The 
 Theban, with great simplicity, asks how he is to be paid for it ; and 
 the Athenian, in a tone of grave superiority, but with some awkward- 
 ness, informs him that he claims it as atoll due to the market. The 
 Theban does not remonstrate, but after some conversation agrees to 
 dispose of all his wares, and to take other goods in return ; but here 
 a difficulty arises, for the same articles which the Athenian proposes 
 in exchange happen to be equally abundant in Bceotia. The scene 
 here passes into burlesque, but it is a burlesque expressive of the 
 character which is assigned to the Theban ; a character of primitive 
 simplicity, utterly unacquainted with all the pests by which existence 
 was poisoned in the corrupt community of Athens. A common 
 sycophant or informer is proposed as an article which the Athenian 
 soil produced in great abundance, but which would be considered as 
 a rarity in Boeotia. The Theban agrees to the exchange, saying, 
 that if he could get such an an'imal to take home, he thinks he could 
 make a handsome profit by exhibiting him." 
 
 The scene which immediately follows (that of the Megarian) has been 
 slightly modified, without detriment, it must be hoped, to the 
 genuine humour of the original, perhaps even with advantage ; since 
 the attention of the English reader is not distracted by that strange 
 contrast of ancient and modern manners, which strikes the reader of 
 the original with an impression, wholly disproportionate to the 
 intention of the Author, and destructive of that general harmony 
 and breadth of effect which he had intended to produce, and which, 
 as far as his contemporaries were concerned, he had succeeded in 
 producing. 
 
 Enter a MEGARIAX with his two little girls. 
 
 MEG. Ah, there's the Athenian market ! Heaven bless it, 
 I say ; the welcomes! sight to a Megarian. 
 I've looked for it, and longed for it, like a child 
 For its own mother. You, my daughters dear, 
 Disastrous offspring of a dismal sire, 
 List to my words ; and let them sink impressed 
 Upon your empty stomachs ; now's the time 
 That you must seek a livelihood for yourselves. 
 Therefore resolve at once, and answer me ; 
 Will you be sold abroad, or starve at home?
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 55 
 
 BOTH. Let us be sold, papa ! Let us be sold ! 
 MEG. I say so too ; but who do ye think will purchase 
 Such useless mischievous commodities ? 
 However, I have a notion of my own, 
 A true Megarian* scheme ; I mean to sell ye 
 Disguised as pigs, with artificial pettitoes. 
 Here, take them, and put them on. Remember now, 
 Show yourselves off; do credit to your breeding, 
 Like decent pigs ; or else, by Mercury, 
 If I'm obliged to take you back to Megara, 
 There you shall starve, far worse than heretofore. 
 This pair of masks too fasten 'em on your faces, 
 And crawl into the sack there on the ground. 
 Mind ye Remember you must squeak and whine, 
 And racket about like little roasting pigs. 
 And I'll call out for Dicseopolis. 
 Ho, Dicaeopolis, Dicaeopolis ! 
 I say, would you please to buy some pigs of mine ? 
 
 Die. What's there ? a Megarian ? 
 
 MEG. [sneakingly\. Yes We're come to market. 
 
 Die. How goes it with you ? 
 
 MEG. We're all like to starve. 
 
 Die. Well, liking is everything. If you have your liking, 
 That's all in all : the likeness is a good one, 
 A pretty likeness ! like to starve, you say. 
 But what else are you doing ? 
 
 MEG. What we're doing ? 
 
 I left our governing people all contriving 
 To ruin us utterly without loss of time. 
 
 Die. It's the only way: it will keep you out of mischief, 
 Meddling and getting into scrapes. 
 
 MEG. Aye, yes. 
 
 * The Athenians could not claim the invention of comedy, which 
 belonged to the Megarians : they therefore indemnified themselves by 
 decrying the humour of the Megarians, as low and vulgar.
 
 56 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Die. Well, what's your other news ? How's corn ? What 
 price ? 
 
 MEG. Corn ? it's above all price ; we worship it. 
 
 Die. But salt ? You've salt, I reckon 
 
 MEG. Salt ? how should we ? 
 
 Have not you seized the salt pans ? 
 
 Die. No ! nor garlic ? 
 
 Have not ye garlic ? 
 
 MEG. What do ye talk of garlic? 
 
 As if you had not wasted and destroyed it, 
 And grubbed the very roots out of the ground. 
 
 Die. Well, what have you got then ? Tell us ! Can't ye ! 
 
 MEG. [in the tone of a sturdy resolute //>]. Pigs 
 Pigs truly pigs forsooth, for sacrifice. 
 
 Die. That's well, let's look at 'em. 
 
 MEG. Aye, they're handsome ones ; 
 
 You may feel how heavy they are, if ye hold 'em up. 
 
 Die. Hey-day ! What's this ? What's here ? 
 
 MEG. A pig, to be sure. 
 
 Die. Do ye say so r Where does it come from ? 
 
 MEG. Come ? from Megara. 
 
 What, an't it a pig ? 
 
 Die. No truly, it does not seem so. 
 
 MEG. Did you ever hear the like ? Such an unaccount- 
 able 
 
 Suspicious fellow ! it is not a pig, he says ! 
 But I'll be judged ; I'll bet ye a bushel of salt, 
 It's what we call a natural proper pig. 
 
 Die. Perhaps it may, but it's a human pig. 
 
 MEG. Human ! I'm human ; and they're mine, that's 
 
 all. 
 
 Whose should they be, do ye think ? so far they're human. 
 But come, will you hear 'em squeak ? 
 
 Die. Aye, yes, by Jove, 
 With all my heart.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 57 
 
 MEG. Come now, pig ! now's the time : 
 
 Remember what I told ye squeak directly ! 
 Squeak, can't ye ? Curse ye, what's the matter with ye ? 
 Squeak when I bid you, I say ; by Mercury 
 I'll carry you back to Megara if you don't. 
 
 DAUGH. Wee wee. 
 
 MEG. Do ye hear the pig ? 
 
 1 Die. The pig, do ye call it ? 
 
 It will be a different creature before long. 
 
 MEG. It will take after the mother, like enough. 
 Die. Aye, but this pig won't do for sacrifice. 
 
 MEG. Why not ? Why won't it do for sacrifice ? 
 
 Die. Imperfect ! here's no tail ! 
 
 MEG. Poh, never mind ; 
 
 It will have a tail in time, like all the rest. 
 But feel this other, just the fellow to it ; 
 With a little further keeping, it would serve 
 For a pretty dainty sacrifice to Venus. 
 
 Die. You warrant 'em weaned ? they'll feed without the 
 mother ? 
 
 MEG. Without the mother or the father either. 
 
 Die. But what do they like to eat ? 
 
 MEG. Just what ye give 'em ; 
 
 You may ask 'em if you will. 
 
 Die. Pig, Pig ! 
 
 IST DAUGH. Wee wee. 
 
 Die. Pig, are ye fond of peas ? 
 
 IST DAUGH. Wee we*e, Wee wee. 
 
 Die. Are ye fond of figs ? 
 
 IST DAUGH. Wee we"e, Wee wee, Wee we*e. 
 
 Die. You little one, are you fond of figs ? 
 
 2ND DAUGH. Wee wee. 
 
 Die. What a squeak was there ! they're ravenous for the 
 
 figs; 
 Go somebody, fetch out a parcel of figs
 
 5 8 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 For the little pigs ! Heh, what, they'll eat I warrant. 
 Lawk there, look at 'em racketing and bustling ! 
 How they do munch and crunch ! in the name of heaven, 
 Why, sure they can't have eaten 'em all already ! 
 
 MEG. \sneakingly\. Not all, there's this one here, I took 
 myself. 
 
 Die. Well, faith, they're clever comical animals. 
 What shall I give you for 'em ? What do ye ask ? 
 
 MEG. I must have a gross of onions for this here ; 
 And the other you may take for a peck of salt. 
 
 Die. I'll keep 'em ; wait a moment. [Exit. 
 
 MEG. Heaven be praised ! 
 
 O blessed Mercury, if I could but manage 
 To make such another bargain for my wife, 
 I'd do it to-morrow, or my mother either. 
 
 Enter INFORMER. 
 
 INF. Fellow, from whence ? 
 
 MEG. From Megara with my pigs. 
 
 INF. Then I denounce your pigs, and you yourself, 
 As belonging to the enemy. 
 
 MEG. There it is ! 
 
 The beginning of all our troubles over again. 
 
 INF. I'll teach you to come Megarizinr; here : 
 Let go of the sack there. 
 
 MEG. Dicaeopolis ! 
 
 Ho, Dicaeopolis ! there's a fellow here 
 Denouncing me. 
 
 Die. Denouncing is he ? Constables, 
 
 Why don't you keep the market clear of sycophants ? 
 You fellow, I must inform ye, your informing 
 Is wholly illegal and informal here. 
 
 INF. What, giving informations against the enemy ; 
 Is that prohibited ? 
 
 Die. At your peril ! Carry 
 
 Your information to some other market.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 59 
 
 MEG. What a plague it is at Athens, this informing ! 
 
 Die. O never fear, Megarian ; take it there, 
 The payment for your pigs, the salt and onions : 
 And fare you well. 
 
 MEG. That's not the fashion amongst us. 
 
 We've not been used to faring well. 
 
 Die. No matter. 
 
 If it's offensive, I'll revoke the wish; 
 And imprecate it on myself instead. [Exit. 
 
 MEG. There now, my little pigs, you must contrive 
 To munch your bread with salt, if you can get it. [Exit. 
 
 The following song consists merely of a satirical enumeration and 
 description of persons, now, for the most part, entirely forgotten. 
 An attempt has therefore been made to give some interest to it (an 
 interest of curiosity at least) by a close imitation of the metre of the 
 original. The Cratinus here mentioned is not the celebrated comic 
 author, but a cotemporary lyrical poet, of whom nothing, I believe, 
 is known. The name of Hyperbolus is upon record, as that of a 
 turbulent public speaker and accuser. Cleonymus is noted in this 
 and other comedies (see p. 18, v. 87-8), as a great overgrown coward, 
 and a voracious intrusive guest. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Our friend's affairs improve apace ; his lucky speculation 
 Is raising him to wealth and place, to name and reputation. 
 
 With a revenue neat and clear, 
 
 Arising without risk or fear, 
 
 No sycophant will venture here 
 
 To spoil his occupation. 
 
 Not Ctesias, the dirty spy, that lately terrified him ; 
 Nor Prepis, with his infamy, will jostle side beside him : 
 
 Clothed in a.jieat and airy dress, 
 
 He'll move at ease among the press, 
 
 Without a fear of nastiness, 
 Or danger to betide him. 
 
 Hyperbolus will never dare to indict him nor arrest him. 
 Cleonymus will not be there to bother and molest him.
 
 60 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Nor he, the bard of little price, 
 
 Cratinus, with the curls so nice, 
 
 Cratinus in the new device 
 
 In which the barber dressed him. 
 
 Nor he, the paltry saucy rogue, the poor and undeserving 
 Lysistratus, that heads the vogue, in impudence unswerving. 
 
 Taunt and offence in all he says; 
 
 Ruined in all kinds of ways ; 
 
 In every month of thirty days, 
 Nine and twenty starving. 
 
 Enter a THEBAN -with his attendants, all bearing burdens ; 
 followed by a train of bagpipers. 
 
 THEB. Good troth, I'm right down shoulder-galled; my 
 
 lads, 
 
 Set down your bundles. You, take care o' the herbs. 
 Gently, be sure don't bruise 'em ; and now, you minstrels, 
 That needs would follow us all the way from Thebes ; 
 Blow wind i' the tail of your bagpipes, puff away. 
 
 Die. Get out! what wind has brought 'em here, I 
 
 wonder ? 
 
 A parcel of hornets buzzing about the door ! 
 You humble-bumble drones Get out ! Get out f 
 
 THEB. As lolaus shall help me, that's well done, 
 Friend, and I thank you ; coming out of Thebes, 
 They blew me away the blossom of all these herbs. 
 You've sarved 'em right. So now would you please to buy, 
 What likes you best, of all my chaffer here ; 
 All kinds, four-footed things and feathered fowl, 
 
 Die. [suddenly, with the common trick of condescension, as 
 
 if he had not obsen<ed him before\ 
 My little tight Boeotian ! Welcome kindly, 
 My little pudding-eater ! What have you brought? 
 
 THEB. In a manner, everything, as a body may say ; 
 All the good cheer of Thebes, and the primest wares,
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 61 
 
 Mats, trefoil, wicks for lamps, sweet marjoram, 
 Coots, didappers, and water-hens what not ? 
 Widgeon and teal. 
 
 Die. Why, you're come here amongst us, 
 
 Like a north wind in winter, with your wild fowl. 
 
 TIIEB. Moreover I've brought geese, and hares moreover, 
 And eels from the lake Copais, which is more. 
 
 Die. O thou bestower of the best spichcocks 
 That ever yet were given to mortal man, 
 Permit me to salute those charming eels. 
 
 THEB. \addressingthe eel, and delivering it io Dic^EOPOLls]. 
 Daughter, come forth, and greet the courteous stranger, 
 First-born of fifty damsels of the lake ! 
 
 Die. O long regretted and recovered late, 
 Welcome, thrice welcome to the Comic Choir; 
 Welcome to me, to Morychus,* and all. 
 (Ye slaves prepare the chafing dish and stove.) 
 Children, behold her here, the best of eels, 
 The loveliest and the best, at length returned 
 After six years of absence. I myself 
 Will furnish you with charcoal for her sake. 
 Salute her with respect, and wait upon 
 Her entrance there within, with due conveyance. 
 
 [the eel is here carried off by DICJEOPOLIS'S servants]. 
 Grant me, ye gods I so to possess thee still, 
 While my life lasts, and at my latest hour, 
 Fresh even and sweet as now, with .... savoury sauce. 
 
 THEB. But how am I to be paid for it? Won't you 
 tell me ? 
 
 Die. Why, with respect to the eel, in the present instance, 
 I mean to take it as a perquisite, 
 
 * At the close of the play, a splendid supper Was given by the choregus 
 to the whole Gothic Choif ; authors, actors, and judges. Merychus was a 
 noted epicure.
 
 62 THE ACHARXtAN*. 
 
 As a kind of toll to the market ; you understand me. 
 These other things of course are meant for sale. 
 
 THEB. Yes, sure. I sell 'em all. 
 
 Die. Well, what do you ask ? 
 
 Or would you take commodities in exchange ? 
 
 THEB. Aye ; think of something of your country produce, 
 That's plentiful down here, and scarce up there. 
 
 Die. Well, you shall take our pilchards or our pottery. 
 
 THEB. Pilchards and pottery ! Naugh, we've plenty of 
 
 they. 
 
 But think of something, as I said before, 
 That's plentiful down here, and scarce up there. 
 
 Die. [after a moment's reflection]. 
 I have it ! A true-bred sycophant and informer. 
 I'll give you one, tied neatly and corded up, 
 Like an oil- jar. 
 
 THEB. Aye ; that's fair ; by the holy twins ! 
 
 He'd bring in money, I warrant, money enough, 
 Amongst our folks at home, with showing him, 
 Like a mischief-full kind of a foreign ape. 
 
 Die. Well, there's Nicarchus moving down this way, 
 Laying his informations. There he comes. 
 
 THEB. [contemplating him with the eye of a purchaser], 
 'A seems but a small one to look at. 
 
 Die. Aye, but I promise ye, 
 
 He's full of tricks and roguery, every inch of him. 
 
 Enter NICARCHUS. 
 
 NIC. [in the pert peremptory tone of his profession as an 
 
 informer], 
 Whose goods are these ? these articles ? 
 
 THEB. Mine, sure ; 
 
 We be come here from Thebes. 
 
 NIC. Then I denounce them 
 
 As enemies' property.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 63 
 
 THEB. \with an immediate outcry]. Why, what harm have 
 
 they done, 
 The birds and creatures ? Why do you quarrel with 'em ? 
 
 NIC. And I'll denounce you too. 
 
 THEB. What, me ? What for ? 
 
 NIC. To satisfy the bystanders, I'll explain. 
 You've brought in wicks of lamps from an enemy's country. 
 
 Die. \ironically\ And so, you bring 'em to light ? 
 
 NIC. I bring to light 
 
 A plot ! a plot to burn the arsenal ! 
 
 Die. [ironically]. With the wick of a lamp ? 
 
 NIC. Undoubtedly. 
 
 Die. In what way ? 
 
 NIC. \with great gravity]. A Boeotian might be capable 
 
 of fixing it 
 
 On the back of a cockroach, who might float with it 
 Into the arsenal, with a north-east wind ; 
 And if once the fire caught hold of a single vessel, 
 The whole would be in a blaze. 
 
 Die. [seizing hold of him\. You dog ! You villain ! 
 Would a cockroach burn the ships and the arsenal ? 
 
 NIC. Bear witness all of ye. 
 
 Die. There, stop his mouth ; 
 
 And bring me a band of straw to bind him up ; 
 And send him safely away, for fear of damage, 
 Gently and steadily, like a potter's jar. 
 
 The metre of the following song is given as a tolerably near approach 
 to that of the original ; in fact, the nearest which has been found 
 consistent with the necessity of rhyme. 
 
 CHOR. To preserve him safe and sound, 
 You must have him fairly bound, 
 With a cordage nicely wound, 
 Up and down, and round and round; 
 Securely packed.
 
 64 THE ACIIARNIANS. 
 
 N. <. 
 Die. I shall have a special care, 
 
 For he's a piece of paltry ware ; 
 
 And as you strike him, here or there \striking him] 
 The noises he returns declare \the informer screaming 
 
 He's partly cracked.* 
 CHOR. How then is he fit for use ? 
 Die. As a store-jar of abuse. 
 Plots and lies he cooks and brews, 
 Slander and seditious news, 
 
 Or anything. 
 
 CHOR. Have you stowed him safe enough ? 
 Die. Never fear, he's hearty stuff ; 
 Fit for usage hard and rough, 
 Fit to beat and fit to cuff, 
 
 To toss and fling. 
 You can hang him up or down,f 
 By the heels or by the crown. 
 THEB. I'm for harvest business bown. 
 CHOR. Fare ye well, my jolly clown. 
 
 We wish ye joy. 
 
 You've a purchase tight and neat ; 
 A rogue, a sycophant complete ; 
 Fit to bang about and beat, 
 Fit to stand the cold and heat, 
 
 And all employ. 
 
 Die. I'd a hard job with the rascal, tying him up ! 
 Come, my Boeotian, take away your bargain. 
 
 THEB. [sneaking to one of his servants]. 
 Ismenias, stoop your back, and heave him up. 
 There softly and fairly so now carry him off. 
 Die. He's an unlucky commodity ; notwithstanding, 
 
 * The soundness of an earthen vessel is ascertained by striking a smai 
 blow upon it, and attending to the tone which it gives out. 
 
 t The Informer being by this time fairly corded and packed, is flun 
 about and hung up, in confirmation of Dicaeopolis's warranty.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 65 
 
 If he earns you a profit, you can have to say, 
 What few can say, you've been the better for him, 
 And mended your affairs by the informer. 
 
 Enter a SLAVE. 
 
 SLAVE \in a loud voice]* Ho, Dicseopolis ! 
 
 Die. Well, what's the matter ? 
 
 Why need ye bawl so? 
 
 SLAVE. Lamachus sends his orders. 
 
 With a drachma for a dish of quails, and three 
 For that Copaic eel, he bid me give you. 
 
 Die. An eel for Lamachus ? Who is Lamachus ? 
 
 SLAVE. The fierce and hardy warrior j he that wields 
 The Gorgon shield, and waves the triple plume. 
 
 Die. And if he'd give me his shield, he should not 
 
 have it : 
 
 Let him wave his plumage over a mess of salt fish. 
 What's more ; if he takes it amiss, and makes a riot, 
 I'll speak to the clerk of the market, you may tell him. 
 But as for me, with this my precious basket, 
 Hence I depart, while ortolans and quails 
 Attend my passage and partake the gales. [Exit. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 An attempt has been here made to reproduce ifl English the peculiaf 
 metre of the original, in which (after an irregular beginning) each 
 line is made to consist of four Cretic measures, of which it is re* 
 quisite that the three first should be of the form already described 
 in p. 24 (namely, a crotchet followed by three quavers). The 
 difficulty arising from the great scarcity of short syllables in the 
 English* language, as compared with the Greek, has led to some 
 infractions of this rule, in the unequal length of some of the lines, 
 and the substitution of the common Cretic measure, in its usual 
 unresolved form ; t not to mention one or two indefensible but 
 
 * The whole of the English Liturgy gives only one instance ot five short 
 syllables in succession: In the three first lines of Herodotus we find a. 
 succession of six and of five. 
 
 t As may be seen in v. 8, 9, 10, and f 1. 
 
 C
 
 66 THE ACHARK1ANS. 
 
 unavoidable false quantities, together with certain hiatuses and semi- 
 hiatuses, which in a less restricted metre it would not have been 
 difficult to avoid. 
 
 EPIRREMA. 
 
 O behold, O behold 
 The serene happy sage, 
 The profound mighty mind, 
 Miracle of our age, 
 Calmly wise, prosperous in enterprise, 
 Cool, correct, boundless in the compass of his intellect. 
 Savoury commodities and articles of every kind 
 Pouring in upon him, and accumulating all around. 
 Some to be reserved apart, ready for domestic use ; 
 
 Some again, that require 
 
 Quickly to be broiled or roast, hastily devoured and 
 smoused, 
 
 On the spot, piping hot. 
 
 See there, as a sample of his hospitable elegance, 
 Feathers and a litter of his offal at the door displayed ! 
 War is my aversion ; I detest the very thought of him. 
 Never in my life will I receive him in my house again ; 
 Positively never ; he behaved in such a beastly way. 
 There we were assembled at a dinner of the neighbour- 
 hood. 
 
 Mirth and unanimity prevailed till he reversed it all, 
 Coming in among us of a sudden, in a haughty style. 
 Civilly we treated him enough, with a polite request : 
 " Please ye to be seated, and to join us in a fair carouse." 
 Nothing of the kind ! but unaccountably he began to 
 
 storm, 
 
 Brandishing a torch as if he meant to set the house afire, 
 Swaggering and hectoring, abusing and assaulting us. 
 
 First he smashed the jars, he spoilt and spilt the 
 
 wines; 
 Next he burnt the stakes, and ruined all the vines.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 67 
 
 ANTEPIRREMA. 
 
 An endeavour to develop with more effect a pretty fanciful allusion in 
 the original has led to another infraction of the metrical rule above 
 described. It is to be hoped, however, that the passage in question 
 (from v. 7 to 14) will not be found to exhibit any marked departure 
 from the general character which belongs to this peculiar form of 
 the Cretic metre. The picture, the work of Zeuxis, was an object 
 well known to all the inhabitants of Athens ; for the sake of the 
 modern reader, it was necessary to insert a slight sketch of it. 
 
 Wherefore are ye gone away, 
 
 Whither are ye gone astray, 
 
 Lovely Peace, 
 
 Vanishing, eloping, and abandoning unhappy Greece ? 
 Love is as a painter ever, doting on a fair design. 
 Zeuxis has illustrated a vision and a wish of mine. 
 
 Cupid is portrayed 
 
 Naked, unarrayed, 
 
 With an amaranthine braid 
 
 Waving in his hand; 
 
 With a lover and a maid 
 
 Bounden in a band. 
 
 Cupid is uniting both, 
 
 Nothing loth. 
 
 Think then if I saw ye with a Cupid in a tether, dear, 
 Binding and uniting us eternally together here. 
 Think of the delight of it ; in harmony to live at last, 
 Making it a principle to cancel all offences past. 
 Really I propose it, and I promise ye to do my best 
 (Old as you may fancy me), to sacrifice my peace and 
 
 rest; 
 
 Working in my calling as a father of a family, 
 Labouring and occupied in articles of husbandry. 
 You shall have an orchard, with the fig-trees in a border 
 
 round 
 Planted all in order, and a vineyard and an olive ground. 
 
 C 2
 
 68 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 When the month is ended, we'll repose from toil, 
 With a bath and banquet, wine and anointing oil, 
 
 HERALD, or CRIER. 
 
 Hear ye ! Good people 1 Hear ye ! A Festival 
 According to ancient custom this same day 
 The feast of the pitchers with the prize for drinkers, 
 To drink at the sound of the trumpet. He that wins 
 To receive a wine-skin ; Ctesiphon's own skin.* 
 
 Die. O slaves ! ye boys and women ! Heard ye not 
 The summons of the herald ? Hasten forth, 
 With quick despatch, to boil, to roast, to fry ; 
 Hacking and cutting, plucking, gutting, flaying ; 
 Hashing and slashing, mincing, fricasseeing. 
 And plait the garlands nimbly ; and bring me here 
 Those, the least skewers of all, to truss the quails. 
 
 When Aristophanes cannot make use of his Chorus to sustain an efficient 
 part, he is apt to indemnify himself for the incumbrance they create, 
 by turning the essential characteristics of a Chorus into ridicule. 
 Here then, and at the close of the following scene (that between 
 Dicaeopolis and the Countiyman), they are represented as time- 
 serving and obsequious ; in " The Lysistrata, " as dawdling, useless, 
 and silly (v. 319 to 49) ; and in " The Birds," as exciting the spleen 
 and impatience of the practical active man of business, by their vague 
 speculations and poetical pedantry (13131036). In "The Peace," 
 tht absurdity of introducing such a Chorus is kept out of sight by 
 the absurd unmanageable behaviour of the Chorus itself (v. 309), 
 
 CHOR. Your designs and public ends 
 First attracted us as friends. 
 But the present boiled and roast 
 Surprises and delights us most. 
 
 * The notion of a person's being flayed, and having his skin converted 
 into a wine-keg, appears to have been familiar to the imagination of the 
 Athenians, and of frequent recurrence in their low colloquial language. 
 Ctesiphon is only known as having been ridiculed by the comic poets for 
 his extreme corpulence. The conqueror, therefore, would be rewarded with 
 a prize of unusual magnitude.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 69 
 
 Die. Wait awhile, if nothing fails, 
 
 You shall see a dish of quails. 
 CHOR. We depend upon your care, 
 Die. Rouse the fire and mend it there. 
 CHOR. See with what a gait and air, 
 What a magisterial look, 
 Like a cool determined cook, 
 
 He conducts the whole affair.* 
 
 Enter a COUNTRYMAN, groaning and lamenting. 
 
 COUNTR. O miserable ! wretched ! wretched man ! 
 
 Die. Fellow, take care with those unlucky words. 
 Apply them to yourself. 
 
 COUNTR. Ah, dear good friend, 
 
 So you've got peace ; a peace all to yourself ! 
 And if ye could but spare me a little drop, 
 Just only a little taste, only five years. 
 
 Die. Why, what's the matter with ye ? 
 
 COUNTR. I'm ruinated, 
 
 Quite and entirely, losing my poor beasts, 
 My oxen, I lost 'em, both of 'em. 
 
 Die. In what way ? 
 
 COUNTR. The Boeotians ! the Boeotians ! it was they. 
 They came down at the back of Phyle there, 
 And drove away my bullocks, both of 'em .... 
 
 Die. But you're in white, I see ; you're out of mourning. 
 
 COUNTR. \in continuation] 
 .... That indeed were all my comfort and support : 
 
 * A dignified and authoritative demeanour is an essential requisite to the 
 perfection of the culinary character. The complete cook (as described in 
 that admirable piece of good-humoured parody, L'hommt des champs a 
 table) 
 
 Donne avec dignite" des loix dans sa 
 
 cuisine. 
 
 Et dispose du ort d'un coq ou d'un 
 dindon, 
 
 Avec 1'air d'un sultan qui condamne 
 
 au cordon : 
 Son maintien est altier, et sa mine 
 
 farouche.
 
 70 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 That used to serve for my manure and maintenance 
 In dung and daily bread ; the poor dear beasts. 
 
 Die. And what is it you want ? 
 
 COUNTR. I'm blind well nigh, 
 
 With weeping and grief. Derketes is my name, 
 In a farm here next to Phyle born and bred : 
 So if ever you wish to do what's friendly by me, 
 Do smear my two poor eyes with the balsam of peace. 
 
 Die. Friend, I'm not keeping a dispensary. 
 
 COUNTR. Do, just to get me a sight of my poor oxen. 
 
 Die. Impossible ! you must go to the hospital. 
 
 COUNTR. Do, pray, just only give me the least drop. 
 
 Die. Not the least drop not I go get ye gone. 
 
 COUNTR. Oh dear ! oh dear ! oh dear ! my poor dear 
 oxen ! [Exit. 
 
 CHOR. He, the chief, is now possessing 
 Peace as an exclusive blessing, 
 Which he will not part withal. 
 Die. Mix honey with the savoury dishes ! 
 Be careful with the cuttle-fishes ! 
 Stew me the kidneys with the caul ! 
 
 CHOR. Hear him shout there ! Hear him bawl ! 
 Die. [louder]. Season and broil him there that eel ! 
 CHOR. You don't consider what we feel ; 
 We're famished here with waiting ; 
 While you choke 
 Us with your smoke, 
 And deafen us with prating. 
 
 Die. Those cutlets, brown them nicely there do yt 
 mind. 
 
 Enter a BRIDESMAN. 
 
 BRID. Ho, Dicaeopolis ! 
 
 Die. Who's there ! Who's that ?
 
 THE ACHARN1ANS. 71 
 
 BRID. A bridegroom, that has sent a dish of meat 
 From his marriage feast. 
 
 Die. Well ! come ! That's handsome of him ; 
 
 That's proper, whoever he is ; that's as it should be. 
 
 BRID. In fact, my friend the bridegroom, he that sent it, 
 Objects to foreign service just at present; 
 He begs you'd favour him with the balsam of peace ; 
 A trifling quantity, in the box I've brought. 
 
 Die. No, no ! take back the dish ; I can't receive it. 
 Dispose it somewhere else ; take it away. 
 I would not part with a particle of my balsam, 
 For all the world not for a thousand drachmas, 
 But that young woman there, who's she ? 
 
 BRID. The bridesmaid ; 
 
 With a particular message from the bride ; 
 Wishing to speak a word in private with you. 
 
 Die. Well, what have ye got to say ? Let's hear it all ! 
 Come step this way No, nearer in a whisper 
 Nearer, I say come, there now ; tell me about it. 
 
 [after listening with comic attention to a supposed 
 
 whisper\. 
 
 Oh, bless me ; what a capital, comical, 
 Extraordinary string of female reasons 
 For keeping a young bridegroom safe at home ! 
 Well, we'll indulge her, since she's only a woman ; 
 She's not obliged to serve ; bring out the balsam ! 
 Come, where's your little vial ? -but I say 
 Do you know the manner of it ? no, not you. 
 How should you, a girl like you ! what ; I must tell you ? 
 Yes and you'll tell the bride; she must observe ; 
 When a ballot is on foot for foreign service ; 
 At the hour of midnight, when he's fast asleep, 
 Then she must be particularly careful, 
 Without disturbing him, to anoint him. There ! 
 
 [giving her back the viat\. 'Exit BRIDESMAID.
 
 72 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 Now take the balsam back, and bring me a funnel 
 To rack my wine off. I must mix my wine. 
 
 CHOR. See yet another ! posting here, it seems, 
 With awful tidings, anxious and aghast. 
 
 MESS. Ho, Lamachus, I say ! Lamachus, Ho! 
 Here's terror and tribulation, wars and woe ! 
 
 [LAMACHUS appears, probably with some appendage, 
 \ to mark the interest which he had been taking in 
 
 the culinary operations supposed to be going on 
 behind the stage.] 
 
 LAM. What hasty summons shakes the castle gates ? 
 
 MESS. The generals have despatched an order to you 
 To muster your caparisons and garrisons, 
 And march to the mountain passes ; there to wait 
 In ambush in the snow : for fresh advices 
 Have been received, with a credible intimation 
 Of a suspicion of an expedition 
 Of a marauding party from Bosotia. 
 
 LAM. Generals ! Aye, generals ! the more the worse. 
 
 Die. Well, is not it hard that a man can't eat his dinner, 
 But he's to be disturbed and called from table, 
 With wars, and Lamachuses, and what not ? 
 
 LAM. You mock me, alas 1 
 
 Die. Say, would you wish to grapple, 
 
 In single combat, with this mailed monster? 
 
 {showing a lobster], 
 
 LAM. Alas, that dismal fatal messenger ! 
 
 Die. But here's a message too, coming for rne, 
 
 2ND MESS. Ho, Dicseopolis ! 
 
 Die. Well, what ? 
 
 2ND MESS. You're summoned 
 
 To go without a moment's loss of time, 
 With your whole cookery, to the priest of Bacchus. 
 The company are arrived ; you keep them waiting, 
 Everything else is ready couches, tables,
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 73 
 
 Cushions, and coverlids for mattresses, 
 Dancing and singing girls for mistresses, 
 Plum cake and plain, comftts and caraways, 
 Confectionery, fruits preserved and fresh, 
 Relishes of all sorts, hot things and bitter, 
 Savouries and sweets, broiled biscuits, and what not ; 
 Flowers and perfumes and garlands, everything. 
 You must not lose a moment. 
 
 LAM. Out alas ! 
 
 Wietch that I am ! 
 
 Die. Tis your own fault entirely, 
 
 For enlisting in the service of the Gorgons. 
 There, shut the door, and serve the dishes here. 
 
 LAM. My knapsack and camp service ; bring it out. 
 
 Die. My dinner service ; bring it here, you lout. 
 
 LAM. Give me my bunch of leeks, the soldiers' fare. 
 
 Die. I'm partial to veal cutlets ; bring them there. 
 
 LAM. Let's see the salt fish ; it seems like to rot. 
 
 Die. I take fresh fish, and broil it on the spot. 
 
 LAM. Bring me the lofty feathers of my crest. 
 
 Die. Bring doves and quails ; I scarce know which is best. 
 
 LAM. Behold this snowy plume of dazzling white. 
 
 Die. Behold the roasted dove, a savoury sight. 
 
 LAM. Don't mock these arms of mine, good fellow, 
 pri'thee. 
 
 Die. These quails of mine, don't think to take them with 
 ye. 
 
 LAM. The case that holds my crest bring it in hasle. 
 
 Die. And the hare-pie for me bring it in paste. 
 
 LAM. My crest have the moths spoilt it? no, not }et. 
 
 Die. My dinner shall I spoil it by a whet. 
 
 LAM. Fellow, direct not your discourse to me. 
 
 Die. Aye, but this boy and I, we can't agree ; 
 And we've a kind of wager, which is best, 
 Locusts or quails, forsooth,
 
 74 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 LAM. Sirrah, your jest 
 
 Is insolent. 
 
 Die. My wager's gone this bout : 
 
 He's all, you see, for locusts, out and out. 
 
 Various demonstrations of menace and defiance take place between 
 Lamachus and Dicax>polis. Lamachus has called for his lance in 
 anger ; Dicoeopolis calls for the spit : both are brought, but neither 
 of them in a state fit for service. Lamachus (after a hostile recon- 
 noitring look), conscious of his present disadvantage, proceeds to 
 unsheath his rusty weapon ; but, in, the meantime, Dicaeopolis has 
 succeeded in disengaging his spit from the roast meat, and appears 
 again ready to confront him upon equal terms. Here again are 
 reciprocal looks and gestures of hostility, which terminate in mutual 
 forbearance. Any amusement which this scene might have afforded 
 to the spectators, must have been derived from the humour of the 
 performers ; to the mere reader, and more particularly to the modern 
 reader, it must be uninteresting ; and might have been passed over, 
 but for a wish (which perhaps has been carried too far) to omit 
 nothing that was admissible. 
 
 LAM. Bring here my lance ; unsheath the deadly point. 
 
 Die. Bring here the spit, and show the roasted joint. 
 
 LAM. This sheath is rusted. Come, boy, tug and try. 
 Ah, there it comes. 
 
 Die. \unspitting his roast meat\ 
 
 It comes quite easily. 
 
 LAM. Bring forth the props of wood, my shield's support. 
 
 Die. Bring bread, for belly timber ; that's your sort ! 
 
 LAM. My Gorgon-orbed shield ; bring it with speed. 
 
 Die. With this full-orbed pancake I proceed. 
 
 LAM. Is not this insolence too much to bear ? 
 
 Die. Is not this pancake exquisite and rare ? 
 
 LAM. Pour oil upon the shield ! What do I trace 
 In the divining mirror? Tis the face 
 Of an old coward, petrified with fear, 
 That sees his trial for desertion near.* 
 
 * It was a common practice to anoint the shield before battle. There 
 was likewise a species of divination practised by figures reflected from an
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 75 
 
 Die. Pour honey on the pancake ! what appears ? 
 A comely personage, advanced in years ; 
 Firmly resolved to laugh at and defy 
 Both Lamachus and the Gorgon family. 
 
 LAM. Bring forth my trusty breastplate for the fight. 
 
 Die. Bring forth the lusty goblet, my delight ! 
 
 LAM. I'll charge with this, accoutred every limb. 
 
 Die. I'll charge with this, a bumper to the brim. 
 
 LAM. Boys, strap the shield and bedding in a pack ! 
 I'll bear myself my knapsack on my back. 
 
 Die. Boy, strap the basket with my feasting mess ; 
 While I just step within to change my dress. 
 
 LAM. Come, boy, take up my shield, and trudge away. 
 It snows ! Good lack ; we've wintry work to-day. 
 
 Die. Boy, take the basket. Jolly work, I say. 
 
 [Exeunt severally. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Go your ways in sundry wise. 
 Each upon his enterprise. 
 One determined to carouse, 
 With a garland on his brows. 
 And a comely lass beside him. 
 His opponent forth hath eyed him, 
 Resolute to pass the night, 
 In a military plight, 
 
 Undelighted and alone ; 
 Starving, wheezing, 
 Sneezing, freezing, 
 
 With his head upon a stone. 
 
 The action of the stage, and even all allusion to it, are suspended durin 
 the following songs, which serve to afford an interval of dramatic 
 
 oiled surface. These two usages are here alluded to. A similar mode of 
 divination appears from the report of modern travellers to be still employed 
 in Egypt. 
 
 \
 
 -6 THE ACHARN1ANS. 
 
 time during which Dicseopolis may be supposed to have returned 
 from his feast, and Lamachus from his expedition. The Chorus 
 remain in possession of the stage, and of their primitive privilege of 
 desultory individual satire. The latter is directed against Anti- 
 machus, who, it seems, had given offence to the dramatic powers by 
 the scantiness of his entertainments. I do not know whether it 
 would be refining too much, to observe that even this capricious sally 
 harmonizes with what has preceded, as well as with the interval 
 which is supposed to elapse ; by the culinary images in the first 
 part, and by the description of a person returning home late at 
 night, in the second. Some circumstances in the original are 
 omitted in the translation, as they seem intended to account for what 
 does not appear unaccountable to a modern ; namely, that a man 
 should walk home at night without a stick. In the passage which 
 immediately follows, the Chorus commence their remonstrance in a 
 calm sober tone which they are unable to maintain. This effect is 
 produced in the original, by the quiet prosaic methodical form of 
 words by which Antimachus is designated a nicety of tone which 
 it was impossible to attain or at least to render obvious in a 
 translation. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 We're determined to discuss 
 Our difference with Antimachus, 
 
 Calmly, simply, candidly; 
 Praying to the powers above, 
 And the just almighty Jove, 
 
 To Sink and blast him utterly. 
 He that sent us all away 
 T'other evening from the play, 
 
 Hungry, thirsty, supperless ; 
 Him we shortly trust to see 
 Sunk in equal misery, 
 
 In the like distress, 
 With a pennyworth of fish, 
 And a curious eager wish 
 
 To behold it fried ; 
 Let him watch, and wait, and turn, 
 With a hungry deep concern, 
 
 Standing there beside.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 77 
 
 Let an accident befall, 
 Which shall overturn the stall, 
 
 And the fishes frying ; 
 There shall he behold the dish 
 Topsy-turvy, with the fish 
 
 In the kennel lying, 
 As he stoops to pick and wipe it, 
 Let a greedy greyhound gripe it, 
 
 Snatch and eat it flying. 
 
 Him let other ills befall, 
 Walking home beneath the wall, 
 Late at night, attacked by ruffians, 
 Orestes and his ragamuffins ; 
 Unprotected and alone, 
 Groping round to find a stone, 
 Let him grasp for his defence 
 A ponderous sirreverence ; 
 Furious, eager, in the dark, 
 Let him fling and miss the mark, 
 
 Smiting upon the cheek, but not severely, 
 Cratinus merely ! 
 
 MESSENGER, SERVANT of LAMACHUS, LAMACHUS, 
 DICVEOPOLIS, and CHORUS. 
 
 The following speech of the Messenger is a burlesque of the tragic 
 speeches in which the arrival of the wounded hero was announced 
 in the last act of a tragedy. 
 
 MESSENGER. 
 
 Ye slaves that dwell in Lamachus's mansion, 
 Prepare hot water instantly in the pipkin ; * 
 
 * The "pipkin," in allusion to the scantiness of Lamachus's establish- 
 ment. See p. 43.
 
 7 8 THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 With embrocations and emollients, 
 
 And bandages and plaster for your lord. 
 
 His foot is maimed and crippled with a stake, 
 
 Which wounded it, as he leaped across a trench. 
 
 His ankle-bone is out, his head is broken, 
 
 The Gorgon on his shield all smashed and spoiled. 
 
 But when the lofty plume of the cock lorrel 
 
 That decked his helm, fell downward in the dirt, 
 
 He groaned, and spake aloud despairingly : 
 
 "O glorious light of Heaven ! Farewell, farewell ! 
 
 For the last time ; my destined days are done." 
 
 Thus moaning and lamenting, down he fell 
 
 Direct into the ditch ; jumped up again ; 
 
 Rushed out afresh ; rallied the runaways ; 
 
 Made the marauders run ; ran after them, 
 
 With his spear point smiting their hinder parts. 
 
 But here he comes himself ; set the door open. 
 
 Lamachus is brought in, wounded and disabled ; his appearance and 
 attendants are caricatures of the exhibition of the wounded heroes, 
 whom it had become the fashion to introduce. The dialogue is a 
 burlesque of the lyrical agonies and lamentations of the same 
 personages. 
 
 LAM. Out, out alas ! 
 I'm racked and torn, 
 With agony scarce to be borne, 
 From that accursed spear : 
 But worst of all, I fear, 
 If Dicaeopolis beholds me here, 
 That he, my foe, will chuckle at my fall. 
 
 Die. My charming lass, 
 What joy is this ! 
 
 What ecstasy ! do give me a kiss ! 
 There coax me, and hug me close, and sympathize ; 
 I've swigged the gallon off; I've won the prize.
 
 THE ACHARNIANS. 79 
 
 LAM. O what a consummation of my woes, 
 What throbs and throes ! 
 
 Die. Eh there I my little Lamachus ! How goes? 
 LAM. I'm in distress. 
 Die. I'm in no less. 
 LAM. Mock not at my misery. 
 Die. Accuse me not of mockery. 
 LAM. 'Twas at the final charge ; I'd paid before 
 A number of the rogues ; at least a score. 
 
 Die. It was a most expensive charge you bore : 
 Poor Lamachus ! he was forced to pay the score ! 
 LAM. O mercy, mighty Apollo ! 
 Die. What, do ye holloh 
 A':er Apollo ? it an't his feast to-day. 
 LAM. [to his bearers}. 
 
 Don't press me, 
 Dear friends ! 
 But place me 
 
 Gently and tenderly. 
 Die. [to the women\. 
 Caress me, 
 
 Dear girls ! 
 Embrace me 
 
 Gently and tenderly. 
 LAM. Strip off the incumbrance of this warlike gear, 
 
 And take me to my bed 
 
 Die. Strip off incumbrances, my pretty dear, 
 And take me off to bed. 
 
 LAM. Or bear me to the public hospital 
 With care. 
 
 Die. Bring me before the judges ; one and all 
 Look there ! 
 I've won the prize ; 
 As this true gallon measure testifies. 
 I've drunk it off. " I triumph great and glorious."
 
 8o THE ACHARNIANS. 
 
 CHOR. And well you may ; triumph away, good fellow ; 
 
 you're victorious. 
 Die. To show my manhood furthermore, and spirit in the 
 
 struggle, 
 I quaffed it off within my breath ; I gulped it in a guggle.* 
 
 CHOR. Then take the wine-skin as your due. 
 We triumph and rejoice with you. 
 
 Die. Then fill my train, 
 And join the strain. 
 
 CHOR. With all my heart ; 
 We'll bear a part. 
 
 ALL. We're triumphant, great and glorious, 
 We're victorious, 
 
 Hurrah ! i 
 
 We've won the day, 
 Wine-skin and all ! 
 Hurrah ! 
 
 * Drinking without deglutition ; still practised in Catalonia the Thracian 
 Amystis.
 
 THE KNIGHTS.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 THE following translation not being calculated for general circulation, it 
 is not likely that it should fall into the hands of any reader whose 
 knowledge of antiquity would not enable him to dispense with the 
 fatigue of perusing a prefatory history. Such prefaces are already 
 before the public, accompanying the translations of Mr. Mitchell and 
 Mr. Walsh, and will be found satisfactory to those who may be 
 desirous of preliminary information. 
 
 It may not, however, be altogether superfluous to prefix a brief summary 
 of preceding circumstances. We have already seen, that the poet, 
 in his comedy of "The Babylonians," had made an attack upon the 
 leading demagogues and peculators of his time. In return for this 
 aggression, Cleon (as described in "The Acharnians"), 
 
 ' ' Had dragged him to the Senate House, 
 And trodden him down and bellowed over him, 
 And mauled him till he scarce escaped alive." 
 
 The poet, however, recovered himself, and in the Parabasis of the same 
 play had defied and insulted the demagogue in the most unsparing 
 terms. In the course, however, of the following summer, Cleon, by 
 a singular concurrence of circumstances, had been raised to the highest 
 pitch of favour and popularity. A body of 400 Spartans having been 
 cut off, and blockaded in an island of the Bay of Pylos, now Navarino, 
 this disaster, in which many of the first families of Sparta were in- 
 volved, induced that republic to sue for peace ; which Cleon, who 
 considered his power and influence as dependent on the continuance 
 of the war, was determined to oppose. Insisting, therefore, that the 
 blockaded troop could be considered in no other light than as actual 
 prisoners, he finally pledged himself, with a given additional force, 
 to reduce the Spartans to surrender within a limited time ; this he 
 had the good fortune and dexterity to effect, and to secure the whole
 
 84 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 credit of the result for himself; having in virtue of his appointment 
 superseded the blockading general, Demosthenes ; while at the same 
 time he secured the benefit of his experience and ability by retaining 
 him as a colleague. The reader, if he has the work at hand, will do 
 well to refer to Mr. Mitford's History, c. xv. sec. x., for a detailed 
 account of this most singular incident, strikingly illustrative of the 
 distinct character of the two rival republics. It was then, imme. 
 diately after this event, when his adversary's power and popularity 
 were at their height, that the poet, undeterred by these apparent dis- 
 advantages, produced this memorable and extraordinary drama. 
 For those readers to whom any further introduction may be necessary, 
 a list of the dramatis personoe, with some accompanying explanations, 
 will perhaps be sufficient. 
 
 DRAMATIS PERSONS. 
 
 DEMUS. A personification of the Athenian people, the John Bull of 
 Athens, a testy, selfish, suspicious old man, a tyrant to his slaves, with 
 the exception of one (a new acquisition), the Paphlagonian Cleon, 
 by whom he is cajoled and governed. 
 
 NICIAS and DEMOSTHENES. The two most fortunate and able generals 
 of the republic, of very opposite characters ; the one cautious and 
 superstitious in the extreme ; the other a blunt, hearty, resolute, jolly 
 fellow, a very decided lover of good wine. These two, the servants 
 of the fublic, are naturally introduced as the slaves of Demus. After 
 complaining of the ill-treatment to which they are subject in conse- 
 quence of their master's partiality to his newly purchased slave the 
 Paphlagonian, they determine to supplant him, which they effect in 
 conformity to the directions of a secret Oracle, in which they find it 
 predicted that the Tanner (i.e., Cleon the Paphlagonian) shall be 
 superseded by a person of meaner occupation and lower character. 
 
 CLEON. The Tanner (as he is called from his property consisting in a 
 leather manufactory), or the Paphlagonian (a nickname applied in 
 ridicule of his mode of speaking from the word paphlazo, to foam), 
 has been already described. He is represented as a fawning obse- 
 quious slave, insolent and arrogant to all except his master, the terror 
 of his fellow-servants. 
 
 A SAUSAGE-SELLER, whose name Agoracritus, "so called from the Agora 
 where I got my living," is not declared till towards the conclusion 
 of the play, is the person announced by the Oracle, as ordained by 
 fate, to baffle the Paphlagonian, and to supersede him in the favour 
 of his master. His breeding and education are described as having 
 been similar to that of the younger Mr. Weller, in that admirable 
 and most unviilgar exhibition of vulgar life, " The Pickwick Papers."
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 85 
 
 Finally, after a long struggle, his undaunted vulgarity of superior 
 dexterity are crowned with deserved success. He supplants the 
 Paphlagonian, and is installed in the supreme direction of the old 
 gentleman's affairs. 
 
 l! appears that the poet must have been subjected to some particular 
 disadvantages and embarrassments in the production of this play. 
 We have seen, that in the preceding comedy of "The Acharnians," 
 Lamachus, a rising military character, had been personated on the 
 stage, and had been addressed by name, without disguise or equivo- 
 cation, throughout the whole of that play. This is no longer the 
 case in the play now before us ; Nicia?, Demosthenes, and Cleon 
 himself, are in no instance addressed by name. It should seem, 
 therefore, that some enactment must have taken place, restraining 
 the license of comedy in this particular ; and here a distinction is to 
 be observed between the choral parts and the dramatic dialogue; 
 for in this very play Cleon is most unsparingly abused by name in 
 the choral songs. The fact seems to have been that the licentious 
 privilege of the " Sacred Chorus," consecrated by immemorial usage, 
 and connected with the rites of Bacchus, could not be abridged by 
 mere human authority ; while the dramatic dialogue (originally 
 derived, in all probability, from scenes in dumb show, which had 
 been introduced to relieve the monotony of the Chorus) was regarded 
 as mere recent invention destitute of any divine sanction, and liable 
 to be modified and restrained by the power of the State. 
 
 With respect to Nicias and Demosthenes, the poet could have found no 
 difficulty in evading the new law. The masks worn by the actors 
 presenting a caricature-likeness of each of them, would be sufficient 
 to identify them ; and it could not be supposed that either of them 
 would be offended at being brought forward in burlesque, when the 
 poet's intention was evidently friendly towards them both ; the whole 
 drift of his comedy being directed against their main antagonist and 
 rival. For the caricature in which they themselves were represented, 
 was in no respect calculated to make them unpopular ; on the con- 
 trary, the blunt heartiness and good-fellowship of the one, and the 
 timid scrupulous piety of the other, were qualities which in different 
 ways recommended them respectively to the favour and goodwill of 
 their fellow-citizens, and which were accordingly exhibited and im- 
 pressed upon the attention of the audience, through the only medium 
 which was consistent with the essential character of the ancient 
 comedy. -~ ' ' 
 
 lUit among the audience themselves there would undoubtedly be some 
 gainsayers, who if they were not silenced at the first outset, might 
 have interrupted the attention of others " This is too bad,'' they 
 might have said j " The poet will get himself into a scrape. Here
 
 86 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 is a manifest infraction of the new law." In order to obviate thi-, 
 the poet in the fust scene, before the proper subject of his comedy is 
 developed, but at the precise point when his individual characters, 
 Nicias and Demosthenes, were sufficiently marked and identified, 
 submits the question to a theatrical vote, appealing to the audience 
 for their sanction and approbation of the course which he has 
 adopted. This appeal, marked as it is with a character of caution 
 and timid itj', is, with a humorous propriety, assigned to the pnrt of 
 Nicias ; -with Clean, however, the case was different, and there was 
 a difficulty which it required all the courage and ability of the poet 
 to surmount no actor dared to expose himself to the resentment of 
 the demagogue by personating; him upon the stage, and among the 
 artists who worked for the theatre, fearful of being considered as 
 accomplices of the poet in his evasion of the new Jaw, no one could 
 be found who would venture to produce the representation of his 
 countenance in a theatrical mask. The poet, therefore, undertook 
 the part himself, and for want of a mask disguised his own feature!;, 
 according to the rude method of primitive comedy, by smearing them 
 with the lees of wine. It is worthy of remark that in his effort to 
 surmount this difficulty he has contrived to identify the demngogue 
 from the first moment of his appearance, concentrating his essential 
 character and his known peculiarities in a speech of five lines his 
 habitual boisterous oath and a slangish use of the dual. 
 
 In order to occupy the vacant space which has been left by the printer, 
 the translator is tempted, for once, to insert a justificatory comment. 
 The speech of Nicias in the opposite page is extended to three lines ; 
 in the original it consists of a line and a half, which might be more 
 accurately and concisely translated thus : 
 
 "Yes, let him perish in the worst way possible, 
 With all his lies, for a first-rate Paphlagonian." 
 
 But there would be one main defect in this accurate translation, 
 namely, that it would not express the intention of the author, nor the 
 effect produced by the actor in repeating the original ; for if we 
 consider it in this view, we find that, short as it is, it contains three 
 distinct breaks ; one at the end of the second word, another at the 
 end of the third, and a third at the end of the line. These momen- 
 tary pauses are characteristic of timid resentment, expressing itself 
 by fits and starts, a character which, to the English reader perusing 
 a printed text, could not be rendered obvious without employing a 
 compass of words much larger than the original.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 87 
 
 Again, we see that the courage and anger of Nicias, even with the help 
 of the beating which he has just received, are barely sufficient to 
 enable him to follow the example of Demosthenes ; even in wrath 
 and pain he is contented to "say ditto" to what his comrade had 
 said before. The poet's intention, in this respect, is made more 
 distinctly palpable to the English reader by the first line of the trans- 
 lated speech. 
 
 And thus much may serve for a commentary on a passage of three lines, 
 and as a sample of others, which if they were not wearisome and 
 egotistical might be extended to every page of this and the preceding 
 play. 
 
 [After a noise of lashes and screams from behind 
 the scenes, DEMOSTHENES comes cut, and is fol- 
 lowed by NICIAS the supposed victim of flagella- 
 tion (both in the dress of slaves'). DEMOSTHENES 
 breaks out in great wrath ; while NICIAS 
 remains exhibiting various contortions of pain for 
 the amusement of the audience.] 
 
 DEM. Out ! out alas ! what a scandal ! what a shame ! 
 May Jove in his utter wrath crush and confound 
 That rascally new-bought Paphlagonian slave ! 
 For from the very first day that he came 
 Brought here for a plague and a mischief amongst us all, 
 We're beaten and abused continually. 
 NIC. [whimpering in a broken voice] 
 I say so too, with all my heart I do, 
 A rascal, with his slanders and lies ! 
 A rascally Paphlagonian ! so he is ! 
 
 DEM. [roughly and good-humouredly\ 
 How are you, my poor soul ? 
 
 NIC, {pettishly and whirling]. Why poorly enough ; 
 And so are you for that matter. 
 
 [NiciAS continues writhing and m oaning~\. 
 DEM. [as if speaking to a child that had hurt himself}. 
 
 Well, come here then ! 
 Come, and we'll cry together, both of us, 
 We'll sing it to Olympus's old tune.
 
 88 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 BOTH. [DEMOSTHENES accompanies NICIAS'S involuntary 
 
 sobs, so as to make a tune of them.] 
 Mo moo moraoo momoo momoo Momoo momoo.* 
 
 DEM. \siiddenly and heartily}. 
 Come, griefs no use It's folly to keep crying. 
 Let's look about us a bit, what's best to be done. 
 
 NIC. [recovering himself]. 
 Aye, tell me ; what do you think ? 
 
 DEM. No, you tell me 
 
 Lest we should disagree. 
 
 NIC. That's what I won t ! 
 
 Do you speak boldly first, and I'll speak next. 
 
 DEM. [significantly, as quoting a well-known verse}. 
 " You first might utter, what I wish to tell." f 
 
 NIC. Aye, but I'm so down-hearted, I've not spirit 
 To bring about the avowal cleverly, 
 In Euripides's style, by question and answer. 
 
 DEM. Well, then, don't talk of Euripides any more, 
 Or his mother either ; don't stand picking endive f J 
 But think of something in another style, 
 To the tune of " Trip and away." 
 
 NIC. Yes, I'll contrive it : 
 
 Say " Let us " first ; put the first letter to it, 
 And then the last, and then put E, R, T. 
 " Let us Az err." I say, " Let us Azert." 
 
 Our common tune, with a syllable added to it, may be made to suit 
 the trimeter iambic, and may be sung lamentably enough : 
 
 " When War's alarms first tore my Willy from arms 
 
 A friend who has accidentally taken up this sheet, tells me that he heard 
 this very chant, " Mo moo," Ac., on the coast opposite Corfu, in a house 
 where the family were moaning over the dead. 
 
 t From the tragedy of " Phaedra : " she is trying to lead her nurse to men- 
 tion the name of Hippolytus, while she avoids it herself. 
 
 | His mother was said to have been a herb woman.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 89 
 
 'Tis now your turn take the next letter to it. 
 Put B for A. 
 
 DEM. " Let us Bezert," I say 
 
 NIC. Tis now my turn " Let us Cezert," I say. 
 'Tis now your turn. 
 
 DEM. " Let us Dezert," I say. 
 
 NIC. You've said it 1 and I agree to it now repeat it 
 Once more ! 
 
 DEM. Let us Dezert ! Let us Dezert 1 
 
 NIC. That's well. 
 
 DEM. But somehow it seems unlucky, rather 
 
 An awkward omen to meet with in a morning ! 
 " To meet with our deserts ! " 
 
 NIC. That's very true ; 
 
 Therefore, I think, in the present state of things, 
 The best thing for us both, would be, to go 
 Directly to the shrine of one of the gods ; 
 And pray for mercy, both of us together. 
 
 DEM. Shrines ! shrines ! Why sure, you don't believe in 
 the gods. 
 
 NIC. I do. 
 
 DEM. But what's your argument ? Where's your proof ? 
 
 NIC. Because I feel they persecute me and hate me, 
 In spite of everything I try to please 'em. 
 
 DEM. Well, well. That's true ; you're right enough in that 
 
 NIC. Let's settle something. 
 
 DEM. Come, then if you like 
 
 I'll state our case at once, to the audience here. 
 
 NIC. It would not be much amiss; but first of all, 
 We must entreat of them ; if the scene and action 
 Have entertained them hitherto, to declare it, 
 And encourage us with a little applause beforehand. 
 
 DEM. \to the audience], 
 
 Well, come now 1 I'll tell ye about it. Here are we 
 A couple of servants, with a master at home
 
 90 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Next door to the hustings. He's a man in years, 
 
 A kind of a bean-fed* husky testy character, 
 
 Choleric and brutal at times, and partly deaf. 
 
 It's near about a month now, that he went 
 
 And bought a slave out of a tanner's yard, 
 
 A Paphlagonian born, and brought him home, 
 
 As wicked a slanderous wretch as ever lived. 
 
 This fellow, the Paphlagonian, has found out 
 
 The blind side of our master's understanding, 
 
 With fawning and wheedling in this kind of way : 
 
 " Would not you please to go to the bath, Sir ? surely 
 
 Itfs not worth while to attend the courts to-day." f 
 
 And, " Would not you please to take a little refreshment ? 
 
 And there's that nice hot broth And here's the threepence 
 
 You left behind you And would not you order supper ? " 
 
 Moreover, when we get things out of compliment 
 As a present for our master, he contrives 
 To snatch 'em and serve 'em up before our faces. 
 I'd made a Spartan cake at Pylos lately, 
 And mixed and kneaded it well, and watched the baking ; 
 But he stole round before me and served it up : 
 And he never allows us to come near our master 
 To speak a word ; but stands behind his back 
 At meal times, with a monstrous leathern fly-flap, 
 Slapping and whisking it round and rapping us off. 
 
 Sometimes the old man falls into moods and fancies, 
 Searching the prophecies till he gets bewildered ; 
 And then the Paphlagonian plies him up, 
 Driving him mad with oracles and predictions. 
 And that's his harvest. Then he slanders us, 
 And gets us beaten and lashed, and goes his rounds 
 
 * In allusion to the beans used in balloting. 
 
 t Sacrifices, with distribution of meat, and largesses to the people on 
 holidays.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 91 
 
 Bullying in this way, to squeeze presents from us : -^ 
 
 " You saw what a lashing Hylas got just now ; 
 
 You'd best make friends with me, if you love your lives. 
 
 Why then, we give him a trifle, or if we don't, 
 
 We pay for it ; for the old fellow knocks us down, 
 
 And kicks us on the ground, and stamps and rages, 
 
 And tramples out the very guts of us 
 
 \turning to NICIAS] 
 
 So now, my worthy fellow ; we must take 
 A fixed determination ; now's the time, 
 Which way to turn ourselves and what to do. 
 
 NIC. Our last determination was the best : 
 That which we settled to A' Be Ce De-zert. 
 
 DEM. Aye, but we could not escape the Paphlagonian, 
 He overlooks us all ; he keeps one foot 
 In Pylos, and another in the Assembly ; 
 And stands with such a stature, stride and grasp ; 
 That while his mouth is open in Eatolia,* 
 One hand is firmly clenched upon the Lucrians, 
 And the other stretching forth to the Peribribeans. 
 
 Nic.f Let's die then, once for all ; that's the best way, 
 Only we must contrive to manage it, 
 Nobly and manfully in a proper manner. 
 
 DEM. Aye, aye. Let's do things manfully ! that's my 
 maxim ! 
 
 NIC. | Well, there's the example of Themistocles 
 To drink bull's blood : that seems a manly death. 
 
 DEM. Bull's blood ! The blood of the grape, I say ! good 
 
 wine ! 
 
 Who knows ? it might inspire some plan, some project, 
 Some notion or other, a good draught of it ! 
 
 * Etolia, Locrians, Perrhebians. 
 
 t In utter despondency, but with a sort of quiet quakerish composure. 
 
 t As before.
 
 92 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 NIC. Wine truly ! wine ! still hankering after liquor ! 
 Can wine do anything for us ? Will your drink 
 Enable you to arrange a plan to save us ? 
 Can wisdom ever arise from wine, do ye think ? 
 
 DEM. Do ye say so ? You're a poor spring-water pitcher ! 
 A silly chilly soul. I'll tell ye what : 
 *It's a very presumptuous thing to speak of liquor, 
 As an obstacle to people's understanding ; 
 It's the only thing for business and dispatch. 
 D'ye observe how individuals thrive and flourish 
 By dint of drink : they prosper in proportion ; 
 They improve their properties ; they get promotion ; 
 Make speeches, and make interest, and make friends. 
 Come, quick now bring me a lusty stoup of wine, 
 To moisten my understanding and inspire me. 
 
 NIC. Oh dear ! your drink will be the ruin of us ! 
 
 DEM. It will be the making of ye ! Bring it here. 
 
 [Exit NiciAs. 
 
 I'll rest me a bit ; but when I've got my fill, 
 I'll overflow them all, with a flood of rhetoric, 
 With metaphors and phrases and what not 
 
 [NICIAS returns in a sneaking way with a pot f>f 
 wine] 
 
 NIC. [in a sheepish silly tone of triumph]. 
 How lucky for me it was, that I escaped 
 With the wine that I took ! 
 
 DEM. [carelessly and bluntly]. Well, where's the Paphla- 
 gonian ? 
 
 NIC. [as before]. He's fast asleep within there, on his 
 
 back, 
 
 On a heap of hides the rascal ! with his belly full, 
 With a hash of confiscations half-digested. 
 
 Though Dem. has not been drinking, his speech has the tone of a 
 drunken man.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 93 
 
 DEM. That's well ! Now fill me a hearty lusty draught. 
 
 NIC. [formally and precisely}. 
 Make the libation first, and drink this cup 
 To the good Genius. 
 
 DEM. [respiring after a long draught}. O most worthy 
 
 Genius ! 
 Good Genius ! 'tis your genius that inspires me ! 
 
 [DEMOSTHENES remains in a sort of drunken bur- 
 lesque ecstasy. ,] 
 
 NIC. Why, what's the matter? 
 
 DEM. I'm inspired to tell you, 
 
 That you must steal the Paphlagonian's oracles 
 Whilst he's asleep.* 
 
 NIC. Oh dear then, I'm afraid, 
 
 This Genius will turn out my evil Genius. [Exit NICIAS. 
 
 DEM. Come, I must meditate, and consult my pitcher ; 
 And moisten my understanding a little more. 
 
 [The interval of NICIAS'S absence is occupied by action 
 in dumb show : DEMOSTHENES is enjoying him- 
 self and getting drunk in private^} 
 NIC. [re-entering with a packet]. 
 How fast asleep the Paphlagonian was : 
 Lord bless me, how mortally he snored and stank. 
 However, I've contrived to carry it off, 
 The cacred oracle that he kept so secret 
 I've stolen it from him. 
 
 DEM. [very drunk}. That's my clever fellow ! 
 Here give us hold ; I must read 'em. Fill me a bumper. 
 In the meanwhile make haste now. Let me see now 
 
 * A general feature of human nature, nowhere more observable than 
 among boys at school ; where the poor timid soul is always dispatched 
 upon the most perilous expeditions. Nicias is the fag Demosthenes the 
 big boy.
 
 94 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 What have we got ? What are they, these same papers ? 
 Oh ! oracles ! . . . . o ra cles ! Fill me a stoup of wine. 
 [In this part of the scene a contrast is kept up 
 between the subordinate nervous eagerness of poor 
 NICIAS, and the predominant drunken phlegmatic 
 indifference of DEMOSTHENES ; who is supposed 
 to amuse himself with irritating the impatience of 
 his companion ; while he details to him by driblets 
 the contents of his own packet^ 
 
 NIC. {fidgeting and impatient after giving him the wine]. 
 Come ! come ! what says the Oracle ? 
 DEM. Fill it again ! 
 
 NIC. Does the Oracle say, that I must fill it again ? 
 DEM. [after fumbling over the papers with a hiccup}. 
 O Bakis ! * 
 
 NIC. What ? 
 
 DEM. Fill me the stoup this instant 
 
 NIC. [with a sort of puzzled acquiescence}. 
 Well, Bakis, I've been told, was given to drink ; 
 He prophesied in his liquor people say. 
 
 DEM. [with the papers in his hand}. 
 Aye, there it is you rascally Paphlagonian ! 
 This was the prophecy that you kept so secret. 
 NIC. What's there? 
 
 DEM. Why there's a thing to ruin him, 
 
 With the manner of his destruction, all foretold. 
 NIC. As how ? 
 DEM. [very drunk}. Why the Oracle tells you how 
 
 distinctly 
 
 And all about it in a perspicuous manner 
 That a jobber t in hemp and flax is first ordained 
 To hold the administration of affairs. 
 
 Dem. 's articulation of this word is assisted by a hiccup, 
 t After the death of Pericles, Eucrates and Lysicles had each taken the 
 lead for a short time.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 95 
 
 NIC. Well, there's one jobber. Who's the next ? Read 
 on! 
 
 DEM. A cattle jobber* must succeed to him. 
 
 NIC. More jobbers ! well then what becomes of him ? 
 
 DEM. He too shall prosper, till a viler rascal 
 Shall be raised up, and shall prevail against him, 
 In the person of a Paphlagonian tanner, 
 A loud rapacious leather- selling ruffian. 
 
 NIC. Is it foretold then, that the cattle jobber 
 Must be destroyed by the seller of leather ? 
 
 DEM. Yes. 
 
 NIC. Oh dear, our sellers and jobbers are at an end. 
 
 DEM. Not yet ; there's still another to succeed him, 
 Of a most uncommon notable occupation. 
 
 NIC. Who's that ? Do tell me ! 
 
 DEM. Must I ? 
 
 NIC. To be sure. 
 
 DEM. A sausage-seller it is, that supersedes him. 
 
 Nic.f A sausage-seller ! marvellous indeed, 
 Most wonderful ! But where can he be found ? 
 
 DEM. We must seek him out 
 
 [DEMOSTHENES rises and bustles up, with the action 
 of a person who, having been drunk, is rousing 
 and recollecting himself for a sudden important 
 occasion. His following speeches are all perfectly 
 
 NIC. But see there, where he comes ! 
 
 Sent hither providentially as it were ! 
 
 DEM. O happy man ! celestial sausage-seller i 
 Friend, guardian and protector of us all ! 
 Come forward ; save your friends, and save the country. 
 
 * See note t on preceding page. 
 t In the tone of Domine Sampson.
 
 96 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 S. S. Do you call me ? 
 
 DEM. Yes, we called to you, to announce 
 
 The high and happy destiny that awaits you. 
 
 NIC. Come, now you should set him free from the in- 
 
 cumbrance * 
 
 Of his table and basket ; and explain to him 
 The tenor and the purport of the Oracle, 
 While I go back to watch the Paphlagonian. \Exit NICIAS. 
 
 DEM. \to the SAUSAGE-SELLER gravely], 
 Set these poor wares aside ; and now bow down 
 To the ground ; and adore the powers of earth and heaven. 
 . S. S. Heigh-day ! Why, what do you mean ? 
 
 DEM. O happy man ! 
 
 Unconscious of your glorious destiny, 
 Now mean and unregarded ; but to-morrow, 
 The mightiest of the mighty, Lord of Athens. 
 
 S. S. Come, master, what's the use of making game ? 
 Why can't ye let me wash the guts and tripe, 
 And sell my sausages in peace and quiet ? 
 
 DEM. O simple mortal, cast those thoughts aside ! 
 Bid guts and tripe farewell ! Look there ! Behold 
 
 [pointing to the audience} 
 The mighty assembled multitude before ye ! 
 
 S. S. \with a grumble of indifference], 
 I see 'em. 
 
 DEM. You shall be their lord and master, 
 The sovereign and the ruler of them all, 
 Of the assemblies and tribunals, fleets and armies; 
 You shall trample down the Senate under foot, 
 Confound and crush the generals and commanders, 
 
 * This speech is intended to express the sudden impression of reverence 
 with which Nicks is affected in the presence of the predestined supreme 
 Sausage-seller. He does not presume to address him ; but obliquely 
 manifests his respect, by pointing out to Demosthenes (in his hearing) the 
 marks of attention to which he is entitled.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 97 
 
 Arrest, imprison, and confine in irons, 
 
 And feast and fornicate in the Council House. * 
 
 S. S. What, I ? 
 
 DEM. Yes, you yourself : there's more to come. 
 
 Mount here ; and from the trestles of your stall 
 Survey the subject islands circling round. 
 
 S. S. I see 'em. 
 
 DEM. And all their ports and merchant vessels ? 
 
 S. S. Yes, all. 
 
 DEM. Then an't you a fortunate happy man ? 
 
 An't you content ? Come then for a further prospect 
 Turn your right eye to Caria, and your left 
 To Carthage ! f and contemplate both together. 
 
 S. S. Will it do me good, d'ye think, to learn to squint ? 
 
 DEM. Not so ; but everything you see before you 
 Must be disposed of at your high discretion, 
 By sale or otherwise ; for the Oracle 
 Predestines you to sovereign power and greatness. 
 
 S. S. Are there any means of making a great man 
 Of a sausage-selling fellow such as I ? 
 
 DEM. The very means you have, must make ye so, 
 Low breeding, vulgar birth, and impudence, 
 These, these must make ye, what you're meant to be. 
 
 S. S. I can't imagine that I'm good for much. 
 
 DEM. Alas ! But why do ye say so ? What's the 
 
 meaning 
 
 Of these misgivings ? I discern within ye 
 A promise and an inward consciousness 
 
 * The Prytaneum, see " Acharnians," v. 126 : the honour of a seat at the 
 public table was sometimes conferred on persons of extraordinary merit in 
 advanced years. See the Parabasis of this play ; see also the Apology of 
 Socrates. Cleon had obtained this privilege for himself, and abused it 
 insolently as appears elsewhere. 
 
 t "Carthage" must be the true reading, the right eye to Caria and the 
 left to " Chalcedon " would not constitute a squint, 
 

 
 98 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Of greatness. Tell me truly : are ye allied 
 To the families of gentry ? 
 
 S. S. Naugh, not I ; 
 
 I'm come from a common ordinary kindred, 
 Of the lower order. 
 
 DEM. What a happiness ! 
 
 What a footing will it give ye ! What a groundwork 
 For confidence and favour at your outset ! 
 
 S. S. But bless ye ! only consider my education ! 
 I can but barely read .... in a kind of a way. 
 
 DEM. That makes against ye ! the only thing against 
 
 ye 
 
 The being able to read, in any way : 
 For now; no lead nor influence is allowed 
 To liberal arts or learned education, 
 But to the brutal, base, and under-bred. 
 Embrace then and hold fast the promises 
 Which the oracles of the gods announce to you. 
 
 S. S. But what does the Oracle say ? 
 
 DEM. Why thus it says, 
 
 In a figurative language, but withal 
 Most singularly intelligible and distinct, 
 Neatly expressed i'faith, concisely and tersely.* 
 
 " Moreover, when the eagle in his pride, 
 With crooked talons and a leathern hide, 
 Shall seize the black and blood-devouring snake ; 
 Then shall the woeful tan pits quail and quake ; 
 And mighty Jove shall give command and place, 
 To mortals of the sausage-selling race ; 
 Unless they choose, continuing as before, 
 To sell their sausages for evermore." 
 
 * This is perfectly in character. Demosthenes (as we have seen) does 
 not profess to believe in the gods ; yet we see that upon occasion he can 
 discuss the merit of the "sacred classics;" like other critics therefore, of 
 the same description, he does it with a sort of patronizing tone.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 99- 
 
 S. S. But how does this concern me?- Explain it, will 
 ye? 
 
 DEM. The leathern eagle is the Paphlagonian. 
 
 S. S. What are his talons ? 
 
 DEM. That explains itself 
 
 Talons for peculation and rapacity. 
 
 S. S. But what's the snake ? 
 
 DEM. The snake is clear and 
 
 obvious : 
 
 The snake is long and black, like a black-pudding ; 
 The snake is filled with blood, like a black-pudding. 
 Our Oracle foretells then, that the snake 
 Shall baffle and overpower the leathern eagle. 
 
 S. S. These oracles hit my fancy ! Notwithstanding .... 
 I'm partly doubtful, how I could contrive .... 
 To manage an administration altogether .... 
 
 DEM. The easiest thing in nature ! nothing easier ! 
 Stick to your present practice : follow it up 
 In your new calling. Mangle, mince and mash, 
 Confound and hack, and jumble things together ! 
 And interlard your rhetoric with lumps 
 Of mawkish sweet, and greasy flattery. 
 Be fulsome, coarse, and bloody ! For the rest, 
 All qualities combine, all circumstances, 
 To entitle and equip you for command ; 
 A filthy voice, a villainous countenance, 
 A vulgar birth, and parentage, and breeding. 
 Nothing is wanting, absolutely nothing. 
 And the oracles and responses of the gods, 
 And prophecies, all conspire in your behalf. 
 Place then this chaplet on your brows ! and worship 
 The anarchic powers ; and rouse your spirits up 
 To encounter him. 
 
 S. S. But who do ye think will help me? 
 
 For all our wealthier people are alarmed, 
 
 D 2
 
 ioo THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 And terrified at him ; and the meaner sort 
 In a manner stupefied, grown dull and dumb. 
 
 DEM. Why there's a thousand lusty cavaliers, 
 Ready to back you, that detest and scorn him ; 
 And every worthy well-born citizen ; 
 And every candid critical spectator ; 
 And I myself; and the help of heaven to boot. 
 And never fear ; his face will not be seen, 
 For all the manufacturers of masks, 
 From cowardice, refused to model it. 
 It matters not ; his person will be known : 
 Our audience is a shrewd one they can guess 
 
 NIC. [in alarm from behind the scenes}. 
 Oh dear ! oh dear ! the Paphlagonian's coming. 
 
 Enter CLEON with a furious look and voice. 
 CLEON. By heaven and earth ! you shall abide it 
 
 dearly, 
 
 With your conspiracies and daily plots 
 Against the sovereign people ! Hah ! what's this ? 
 What's this Chalcidian goblet doing here ? 
 Are ye tempting the Chalcidians to revolt ? * 
 Dogs ! villains ! every soul of ye shall die. 
 
 [The SAUSAGE-SELLER runs off in a fright. 
 DEM. Where are ye going? Where are ye running? 
 
 Stop! 
 
 Stand firm, my noble valiant Sausage-seller ! 
 Never betray the cause. Your friends are nfgh. 
 
 \to the CHORUS] 
 Cavaliers and noble captains 1 now's the time ! advance in 
 
 sight ! 
 
 March in order make the movement, and out-flank him on 
 the right ! 
 
 * The Chalcidians did in fact revolt in the following year ; their Intentions 
 were probably suspected at the time.
 
 THE K MIGHTS 101 
 
 [to the SAUSAGE-SELLER] 
 There I see them bustling, hasting ! only turn and make a 
 
 stand, 
 Stop but only for a moment, your allies are hard at hand. 
 
 It is necessary to repair an omission which the reader may have already 
 noticed. Among the dramatis personSe enumerated in page 84, no 
 mention has been made of the Chorus, from which, as usual, the 
 comedy derived its title " The Knights." This body composing 
 the middle order of the State were, as it appears, decidedly hostile 
 to Cleon. In the first lines of the preceding play, the merit of having 
 procured his conviction and punishment on a charge of bribery is 
 ascribed to them ; and again, in the same play, the Chorus express 
 their detestation of the demagogue by threatening to sacrifice him 
 to the vengeance of the knights,* and we have just seen that Demos- 
 thenes encourages the Sausage-seller by promising him the assistance 
 of a thousand of these " iusty cavaliers," who " scorn and detest " 
 his antagonist. 
 
 [During the last lines the CHORUS OF CAVALIERS 
 with their hobby-horses have entered and occupied 
 their position in the orchestra. They begin their 
 attack upon CLEON.] 
 
 CHOR. Close around him, and confound him, the con- 
 founder of us all. 
 Pelt him, pummel him and maul him ; rummage, ransack, 
 
 overhaul him. 
 Overbear him and out-bawl him ; bear him down and bring 
 
 him under. 
 Bellow like a burst of thunder, robber ! harpy 1 sink of 
 
 plunder ! 
 Rogue and villain ! rogue and cheat ! rogue and villain, I 
 
 repeat ! 
 
 Oftener than I can repeat it, has the rogue and villain 
 cheated. 
 
 * See " Acharnians, " p, 28.
 
 102 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Close around him left and right ; spit upon him ; spurn and 
 
 smite : 
 Spit upon him as you see; spurn and spit at him like 
 
 me. 
 But beware, or he'll evade ye, for he knows the private 
 
 track, 
 Where Eucrates * was seen escaping with the mill dust on 
 
 his back. 
 CLEON. Worthy veterans of the jury, you that either right 
 
 or wrong, 
 With my threepenny provision, t I've maintained and 
 
 cherished long, 
 Come to my aid ! I'm here waylaid assassinated and 
 
 betrayed ! 
 CHOR. Rightly served ! we serve you rightly, for your 
 
 hungry love of pelf, 
 For your gross and greedy rapine, gormandizing by 
 
 yourself; 
 You that ere the figs are gathered, pilfer with a privy 
 
 twitch 
 Fat delinquents and defaulters, pulpy, luscious, plump, and 
 
 rich ; 
 
 Pinching, fingering, and pulling tampering, selecting, cull- 
 ing, 
 With a nice survey discerning, which are green and which 
 
 are turning, 
 
 Which are ripe for accusation, forfeiture, and confiscation. 
 Him besides, the wealthy man, retired upon an easy 
 
 rent, 
 Hating and avoiding party, noble-minded, indolent, 
 
 See note to p. 94. He was also an owner of mills, as appears by the 
 Scholiast. 
 
 t The juryman's fee, a means of subsistence to poor old men driven from 
 their homes by the war.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 103 
 
 Fearful of official snares, intrigues and intricate affairs ; 
 Him you mark ; you fix and hook him, whilst he's gaping 
 
 unawares ; 
 At a fling, at once you bring him hither from the 
 
 Chersonese,* 
 Down you cast him, roast and baste him, and devour him 
 
 at your ease. 
 CLEON. Yes ! assault, insult, abuse me ! this is the return, 
 
 I find, 
 
 For the noble testimony, the memorial I designed : 
 Meaning to propose proposals, for a monument of stone, 
 On the which, your late achievements^ should be carved 
 
 and neatly done. 
 CHOR. Out, away with him ! the slave ! the pompous 
 
 empty fawning knave ! 
 Does he think with idle speeches to delude and cheat us 
 
 all? 
 
 As he does the doting elders, that attend his daily call.J 
 Pelt him here, and bang him there ; and here and there and 
 
 everywhere. 
 CLEON. Save me, neighbours ! O the monsters ! O my 
 
 side, my back, my breast ! 
 CHOR. What, you're forced to call for help ? You brutal 
 
 overbearing pest. 
 S. S. \returning to CLEON]. 
 I'll astound you with my voice ; with my bawling looks and 
 
 noise. 
 CHOR. If in bawling you surpass him, you'll achieve a 
 
 victor's crown ; 
 If again you overmatch him, in impudence, the day's our 
 
 own. 
 
 * Of Thrace. Many Athenians possessed estates, and resided there for a 
 quiet life. 
 
 t In the expedition to Corinth. 
 $ The veterans of the jury. See note, p. 102.
 
 io 4 THE KNIGHTS, 
 
 CLEON. I denounce this traitor here, for sailing on clan- 
 destine trips, 
 With supplies of tripe and stuffing, to careen the Spartan 
 
 ships. 
 S. S. I denounce then and accuse him, for a greater worse 
 
 abuse : 
 That he steers his empty paunch, and anchors at the public 
 
 board : 
 
 Running in without a lading, to return completely stored ! 
 CHOR. Yes ! and smuggles out, moreover, loaves and 
 
 luncheons not a few, 
 
 More than ever Pericles, in all his pride, presumed to do. 
 CLEON. [in a thundering tone]. Dogs and villains, you 
 
 shall die ! 
 S. S. [in a louder, shriller tone\. 
 
 Aye ! I can scream ten times as high. 
 CLEON. I'll overbear ye, and out-bawl ye. 
 S. S. But I'll out-scream ye, and out-squall ye. 
 CLEON. I'll impeach you, whilst aboard, 
 
 Commanding on a foreign station. 
 S. S.* I'll have you sliced, and slashed, and scored. 
 CLEON. Your lion's skin of reputation, 
 
 Shall be flayed off your back and tanned. 
 S. S. I'll take those guts of yours in hand. 
 CLEON. Come, bring your eyes and mine to meet ! 
 
 And stare at me without a wink ! 
 S. S. Yes ! in the market-place and street, 
 I had my birth and breeding too ; 
 And from a boy, to blush or blink, 
 I scorn the thing as much as you. 
 CLEON. I'll denounce you if you mutter. 
 S. S. I'll douse ye the first word you utter. 
 
 The threats of each party are in the terms of their respective trades.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 105 
 
 CLEOM. My thefts are open and avowed ; 
 
 And I confess them, which you dare not. 
 S. S. But I can take false oaths aloud, 
 And in the presence of a crowd ; 
 
 And if they know the fact I care not. 
 CLEON. What ! do you venture to invade 
 My proper calling and my trade ? 
 But I denounce here, on the spot, 
 The sacrificial tripe you've got ; 
 
 The tithe it owes was never paid : 
 It owes a tithe, I say, to Jove ; 
 You've wronged and robbed the powers above 
 
 CHORUS. Cretic Metre* 
 
 Dark and unsearchably profound abyss, 
 
 Gulf of unfathomable 
 
 Baseness and iniquity 1 
 
 Miracle of immense, 
 
 Intense impudence ! 
 
 Every court, every hall, 
 
 Juries and assemblies, all 
 
 Are stunned to death, deafened all, 
 
 Whilst you bawl. 
 
 The bench and bar 
 
 Ring and jar. 
 
 Each decree 
 
 Smells of thee, , 
 
 Land and sea 
 
 Stink of thee. 
 
 Whilst we 
 
 Scorn and hate, execrate, abominate, 
 
 Thee the brawler and embroiler, of the nation and the State- 
 You that on the rocky seat of our assembly raise a din, 
 
 * See note to " Acharnians, " p. 24.
 
 io6 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Deafening all our ears with uproar, as you rave and howl 
 
 and grin ; 
 
 Watching all the while the vessels with revenue sailing in. 
 Like the tunny-fishers perched aloft, to look about and 
 
 bawl, 
 When the shoals are seen arriving, ready to secure a 
 
 haul. 
 CLEON. I was aware of this affair, and every stitch of it 
 
 I know, 
 Where the plot was cobbled up and patched together, long 
 
 ago. 
 S. S. Cobbling is your own profession, tripe and sausages 
 
 are mine : 
 But the country folks complain,* that in a fraudulent 
 
 design, 
 You retailed them skins of treaties, that appeared like trusty 
 
 leather, 
 Of a peace secure and lasting ; but the wear-and-tear and 
 
 weather 
 Proved it all decayed and rotten, only fit for sale and 
 
 show. 
 DEM. Yes ! a pretty trick he served me ; there was I 
 
 despatched to go, 
 
 Trudged away to Pergasae,* but found upon arriving there, 
 That myself and mv commission, both were out at heels and 
 
 bare. 
 
 In a review of Mr. Mitchell's Aristophanes, a passage in his translation 
 of one of the choruses is noted with particular commendation. It 
 is said, "Mr. Mitchell has hit upon the very key-note of Aristo- 
 phanes, whose choruses are so contrived throughout this play as to 
 afford a relief and contrast to the vulgar acrimony of the dialogue ; 
 
 * The allusions in these lines relate to some incidents not recorded in 
 history, some artifice by which Cleon had succeeded in deluding and 
 disappointing the party ; the country people in particular (long excluded 
 from the enjoyment of their property) who were anxious for peace. 
 
 \
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 107 
 
 not in their logical and grammatical sense, but in their form and 
 rhythm, and in the selection of the words, which if heard imperfectly, 
 would appear to belong to a grave or tender or beautiful subject." 
 If the occasion had admitted of it, this observation might have been 
 applied more particularly to the first lines of each chorus ; for we may 
 remark instances in which the contrast of grave or graceful lines at 
 the commencement was intended to give additional force to the 
 vehemence of invective immediately following in the chorus its-elf. 
 Thus, in the original of the chorus which is given above, an expres- 
 sion of wonder and awe* is conveyed to the ear by the mere rhythm 
 of the first line, independent of, and in fact contradictory to, the 
 sense of the words themselves, a kind of contrast which appeared 
 unattainable in the English language. What could not, therefore, 
 be accomplished by " form and rhythm " has in this instance been 
 attempted by "the selection of words." But justificatory criticism 
 has already been renounced, as absurd and tiresome. This note had 
 been begun solely for the purpose of bringing under the notice of the 
 reader, with due modification, the observation, somewhat too largely 
 expressed, in the review above mentioned. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Even in your tender years, 
 
 And your early disposition, 
 You betrayed an inward sense 
 Of the conscious impudence, 
 
 Which constitutes a politician. 
 Hence you squeeze and drain alone the rich milch kine of 
 
 our allies ; 
 
 Whilst the son of Hippodamus licks his lips with longing 
 eyes. 
 
 But now, with eager rapture we behold 
 A mighty miscreant of baser mould ! 
 A more consummate ruffian ! 
 An energetic ardent ragamuffin ! 
 Behold him there ! He stands before your 
 eyes, 
 
 * O altitude !
 
 io8 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 To bear you down, with a superior frown, 
 
 A fiercer stare, 
 And more incessant and exhaustless lies. 
 
 The metre of the lines which follow, namely, the tetrameter-iambic, is 
 so essentially base and vulgar that no English song afforded a speci- 
 men fit to be quoted, and the songs themselves were not proper to 
 be menlioned ; at last, Mr. Cornewall Lewis, whose kind importu- 
 nities had extorted the publication of the preceding play of " The 
 Acharnians," suggested as a produceable specimen the first line of a 
 sufficiently vulgar but otherwise inoffensive song 
 
 1 ' A captain bold of Halifax, who lived in country quarters. " 
 
 It would not be right that Mr. Lewis's name should be menlioned here 
 without an acknowledgment of the obligations due to him, for his 
 friendly zeal in forwarding that play through the press, and correct- 
 ing some inaccuracies incidental to the work of a very unsystematic 
 scholar. 
 
 The metre, of which so derogatory a character has been given, is always 
 appropriated in the comedies of Aristophanes, to those scenes of 
 argumentative altercation in which the ascendency is given ti the 
 more ignoble character; in this respect it stands in decided contrast 
 with the anapaestic measure, 
 
 IAMBIC TETRAMETER. 
 CHOR. \to the SAUSAGE-SELLER]. 
 Now then do you, that boast a birth, from whence you 
 
 might inherit, 
 And from your breeding have derived a manhood and a 
 
 spirit, 
 
 Unbroken by the rules of art, untamed by education, 
 Show forth the native impudence and vigour of the nation ! 
 S. S Well ; if you like, then, I'll describe the nature of 
 
 him clearly, 
 The kind of rogue I've known him for. 
 
 CLEON. My friend, you're somewhat early. 
 
 First give me leave to speak. 
 
 S- S. I won't, by Jove ! Aye. You may bellow ! 
 
 I'll make you know, before I go, that I'm the baser fellow*
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 109 
 
 CHOR. Aye ! stand to that ! Stick to the point ; and 
 
 for a further glory, 
 
 Say that your family were base, time out mind before ye. 
 CLEON. Let me speak first ! 
 S. S. I won't. 
 
 CLEON. You shall, by Jove ! 
 
 S. S. I won't, by Jove, though ! 
 
 CLEON. By Jupiter, I shall burst with rage ! 
 S. S. No matter, I'll prevent you. 
 
 CHOR. No; don't prevent, for Heaven's sake! Don't 
 
 hinder him from bursting. 
 CLEON. What means what ground of hope have you 
 
 to dare to speak against me ? 
 S. S. What ! I can speak ! and I can chop garlic and 
 
 lard and logic. 
 CLEON. Aye ! You're a speaker, I suppose ! I should 
 
 enjoy to see you, 
 
 Like a pert scullion set to cook to see your talents fairly 
 Put to the test, with hot blood-raw disjointed news arriving,* 
 Obliged to hash and season it, and dish it in an instant. 
 You're like the rest of 'em the swarm of paltry weak 
 
 pretenders. 
 You've made your pretty speech perhaps, and gained a little 
 
 lawsuit 
 
 Against a merchant foreigner, by dint of water-drinking, 
 And lying long awake o' nights, composing and repeating, 
 And studying as you walked the streets, and wearing out 
 
 the patience 
 
 Of all your friends and intimates, with practising before- 
 hand : 
 
 And now you wonder at yourself, elated and delighted 
 At your own talent for debate you silly saucy coxcomb. 
 
 When the character of the debate is suddenly changed by the receipt 
 of unexpected intelligence.
 
 no THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 S. S. What's your own diet ? How do you contrive to 
 
 keep the city 
 Passive and hushed What kind of drink drives ye to that 
 
 presumption ? 
 CLEON. Why mention any man besides, that's capable to 
 
 match me ; 
 
 That after a sound hearty meal of tunny-fish and cutlets, 
 Can quaff my gallon ; and at once, without premeditation, 
 With slang and jabber overpower the generals at Pylos.* 
 S. S. But I can eat my paunch of pork, my liver and my 
 
 haslets, 
 And scoop the sauce with both my hands ; and with my 
 
 dirty fingers 
 I'll seize old Nicias by the throat, and choke the grand 
 
 debaters. 
 CHOR. We like your scheme in some respects ; but 
 
 still that style of feeding, 
 
 Keeping the sauce all to yourself, appears a gross proceed- 
 ing. 
 CLEON. But I can domineer and dine on mullets at 
 
 Miletus. 
 S. S. And I can eat my shins of beef, and farm the mines 
 
 of silver. 
 CLEON. I'll burst into the Council House, and storm and 
 
 blow and bluster. 
 S. S. I'll blow the wind into your tail, and kick you like 
 
 a bladder. 
 CLEON. I'll tie you neck and heels at once, and kick ye 
 
 to the kennel. 
 CHOR. Begin with us then ! Try your skill ! kicking 
 
 us all together ! 
 
 CLEON. I'll have ye pilloried in a trice. 
 S. S. I'll have you tried for cowardice. 
 
 See Mitford, ch. xv., sect. 10, p. 293.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. in 
 
 CLEON. I'll tan your hide to cover seats. 
 S. S. Yours shall be made a purse for cheats. 
 The luckiest skin* that could be found. 
 CLEON. Dog I'll pin you to the ground 
 
 With ten thousand tenter-hooks. 
 S. S. I'll equip you for the cooks, 
 
 Neatly prepared, with skewers and lard. 
 CLEON. I'll pluck your eyebrows off, I will. 
 S. S. I'll cut your collops out, I will. 
 
 It is evident that a scuffle or wrestling match takes place here between 
 the two rivals. It continues during the verses of Demosthenes and 
 those of the Chorus, the last of which mark that the Sausage-seller 
 has the advantage ; and the Sausage-seller's speech of four lines which 
 follows, implies that he is at the same time exhibiting his adversary 
 in a helpless posture. 
 
 It is to be observed that the palaestra was not a mere school of wrestling 
 or boxing. The attention of the masters of the palaestra, like the 
 dancing-masters of former times in France and England, was directed 
 to form their pupils to a general dignity and elegance of carriage. 
 
 Hence all awkward or indecent effort was disallowed in the palaestra of 
 the better educated class. But, as wrestling was a universal national 
 exercise, it would of course be practised vulgarly amongst the vulgar, 
 and there would be many tricks and casts retained and practised by 
 the lowest class which were rejected by the more dignified palaestra. 
 The Sausage-seller was represented as foiling his opponent by some 
 unbecoming unsightly effort which was characteristic of a town 
 blackguard. Thus the scuffle between them formed a kind of dumb 
 show, analogous to, and illustrative of the dialogue ; exhibiting in the 
 triumph of the Sausage-seller the peculiar advantages reserved for 
 superior impudence and vulgarity both in word and deed. 
 
 DEMOSTHENES. 
 
 Yes, by Jove ! and like a swine, 
 Dangling at the butcher's door, 
 
 * It is well known that purses made from the skins of different animals 
 are more or less lucky. Among ourselves the skin of a weasel, or of a 
 black cat, is esteemed the most universally lucky.
 
 U2 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Dress him cleanly, neat and fine, 
 Washed and scalded o'er and o'er ; 
 
 Strutting out in all his pride, 
 
 With his carcase open wide, 
 
 And a skewer in either side ; 
 
 While the cook, with keen intent, 
 By the steady rules of art, 
 Scrutinizes every part, 
 
 The tongue, the throat, the maw, the vent. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Some element may prove more fierce than fire I 
 Some viler scoundrel may be seen, 
 Than ever yet has been ! 
 And many a speech hereafter, many a word, 
 More villainous, than ever yet was heard. 
 We marvel at thy prowess and admire ! 
 Therefore proceed! 
 In word and deed, 
 Be firm and bold, 
 Keep steadfast hold ! 
 
 Only keep your hold upon him . Persevere as you began ; 
 He'll be daunted and subdued ; I know the nature of the 
 
 man. 
 S. S. Such as here you now behold him, all his life has 
 
 he been known. 
 
 Till he reaped a reputation, in a harvest not his own ; 
 Now he shows the sheaves* at home, that he clandestinely 
 
 conveyed, 
 
 Tied and bound and heaped together, till his bargain can 
 be made. 
 
 The Spartan prisoners taken at Pylos, and kept in the most severe 
 confinement.
 
 THE xNicnfs. 113 
 
 CLEON. [released and recovering himself}. 
 I'm at ease, I need not fear ye, with the Senate on my side, 
 And the Commons all dejected, humble, poor, and stupefied- 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Mark his visage ! and behold, 
 
 How brazen, unabashed, and bold ! 
 How the colour keeps its place 
 
 In his face ! 
 CLEON. Let me be the vilest thing, the mattress that 
 
 Cratinus* stains; 
 
 Or be forced to learn to sing, Morsimus's f tragic strains ; 
 If I don't despise and loath, scorn and execrate ye both. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Active, eager, airy thing ! 
 
 Ever hovering on the wing, 
 
 Ever hovering and discovering 
 Golden sweet secreted honey, 
 Nature's mintage and her money. 
 May thy maw be purged and scoured, 
 
 From the gobbets it devoured ; 
 By the emetic drench of law ! 
 With the cheerful ancient saw, 
 Then we shall rejoice and sing, 
 
 Chanting out with hearty glee, 
 
 " Fill a bumper merrily, 
 
 For the merry news I bring ! " 
 But he, the shrewd and venerable 
 Manciple J of the public table, 
 
 * The famous comic poet, now grown old ; and infirm, as it appears. 
 
 t Ridiculed elsewhere as a bad writer of tragedy. See "The Peace," v. 803. 
 
 j The old butler and steward of the Prytaneum, who had hitherto been 
 used to well-bred company and civil treatment, would be overjoyed at his 
 deliverance from such a guest as Cleon.
 
 II4 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Will chant and chuckle and rejoice, 
 
 With heart and voice. 
 
 CLEON. May I never eat a slice, at any public sacrifice, 
 If your effrontery and pretence, shall daunt my steadfast 
 
 impudence. 
 S. S. Then, by the memory which I value, of all the 
 
 bastings in our alley, 
 When from the dog butcher's tray I stole the lumps of meat 
 
 away. 
 
 I trust to match you with a feat, and do credit to my meat, 
 Credit to my meat and feeding, and my bringing up and 
 
 breeding. 
 
 CLEON. Dog's meat ! What a dog art thou ! But I shall 
 dog thee fast enow. 
 
 [CLEON pays no attention to the short dialogue which 
 follows between the SAUSAGE-SELLER and the 
 CHORUS. The actor's part was in dumb shou>, 
 exhibiting a mimicry of the Demagogue's usual 
 gesture and deportment, when exciting himself in 
 preparation for a vehement burst of oratory '.] 
 S. S. Then, there were other petty tricks, I practised as a 
 
 child ; 
 Haunting about the butchers' shops, the weather being 
 
 mild. 
 " See, boys," says I, " the swallow there ! Why summer's 
 
 come I say," 
 And when they turned to gape and stare, I snatched a steak 
 
 away. 
 CHOR. A clever lad you must have been, you managed 
 
 matters rarely, 
 
 To steal at such an early day, so seasonably and fairly. 
 S. S. But if by chance they spied it, I contrived to hide 
 
 it handily ; 
 
 Clapping it in between my hams, tight and close and even ; 
 Calling on all the powers above, and all the gods in heaven ;
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 115 
 
 And there I stood, and made it good, with staring and for- 
 swearing. 
 So that a statesman of the time, a speaker shrewd and 
 
 witty, 
 Was heard to say, " That boy one day will surely rule the 
 
 city." 
 CHOR. 'Twas fairly guessed, by the true test, by your 
 
 address and daring, 
 
 First in stealing, then concealing, and again in swearing. 
 CLEON. I'll settle ye ! Yes, both of ye ! the storm of 
 
 elocution 
 
 Is rising here within my breast, to drive you to confusion, 
 And with a wild commotion, overwhelm the land and 
 
 ocean. 
 S. S. Then I shall hand my sausages, and reef 'em close 
 
 and tight, 
 And steer away before the wind, and run you out of 
 
 sight. 
 
 DEM. And I shall go, to the hold below, to see that all 
 is right. \Exit. 
 
 CLEON. By the holy goddess I declare, 
 .Rogue and robber as you are, 
 I'll not brook it, or overlook it ; 
 The public treasure that you stole, 
 I'll force you to refund the whole .... 
 CHOR. (Keep near and by the gale grows high.) 
 CLEON. [in continuation] 
 
 .... Ten talents, I could prove it here, 
 Were sent to you from Potidea. 
 S. S. Well, will you take a single one 
 
 To stop your bawling and have done ? 
 CHOR. Yes, I'll be bound he'll compound, 
 
 And take a share the wind grows fair. 
 This hurricane will overblow, 
 Fill the sails and let her go !
 
 n6 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 CLEON. I'll indict ye, I'll impeach, 
 
 I'll denounce ye in a speech ; 
 
 With four several accusations, 
 
 For your former peculations, 
 Of a hundred talents each. 
 S. S. But I'll denounce ye, 
 
 And I'll trounce ye, 
 
 With accusations half a score ; 
 
 Half a score, for having left 
 
 Your rank in the army ; and for theft 
 
 I'll charge ye with a thousand more. 
 CLEON. I'll rummage out your pedigree, 
 
 And prove that all your ancestry 
 Were sacrilegious and accurst.* 
 S. S. I'll prove the same of yours ; and first 
 
 The foulest treasons and the worst 
 
 Their deep contrivance to conceal 
 
 Plots against the common weal ; 
 
 Which I shall publish and declare 
 
 Publish, and depose, and swear. 
 CLEON. Plots, concealed and hidden ! Where ? 
 S. S. Where ? Where plots have always tried 
 
 To hide themselves beneath a hide ! 
 CLEON. Go for a paltry vulgar slave. 
 S. S. Get out for a designing knave. 
 CHOR. Give him back the cuff you got ! 
 CLEON. Murder ! help ! a plot ! a plot ! 
 
 I'm assaulted and beset ! 
 CHOR. Strike him harder ! harder yet ! 
 
 Pelt him, rap him, 
 
 Slash him, slap him, 
 
 Across the chops there, with a wipe 
 
 Many of the first families were involved in the guilt of a sacrilegious 
 massacre, committed nearly 200 years before. See Mr. Clinton's "Fasti 
 Olymp." 40,
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 117 
 
 w* 
 
 Of your entrails and your tripe !* 
 Keep him down the day's your own. 
 O cleverest of human kind ! the stoutest and the boldest, 
 The saviour of the State, and us, the friends that thou 
 
 beholdest ; 
 No words can speak our gratitude ; all praise appears too 
 
 little. 
 
 You've fairly done the rascal up, you've nicked him to a 
 tittle. 
 
 CLEON. By the holy goddess, it's not new to me 
 This scheme of yours. I've known the job long since, 
 The measurement and the scantling of it all, 
 And where it was shaped out and tacked together. 
 
 CHOR. Aye ! There it is ! You must exert yourself; f 
 Come, try to match him again with a carpenter's phrase. 
 
 S. S. Does he think I have not tracked him in his intrigues 
 At Argos ? his pretence to make a treaty 
 With the people there ? and all his private parley 
 With the Spartans ? There he works and blows the coals ; 
 And has plenty of other irons in the fire. 
 
 CHOR. Well done, the blacksmith beats the carpenter.! 
 
 S. S. [in continuation] 
 
 And the envoys that come here, are all in a tale ; 
 All beating time to the same tune. I tell ye, 
 It's neither gold nor silver, nor the promises, 
 Nor the messages you send me by your friends, 
 That will ever serve your turn ; or hinder me 
 From bringing all these facts before the public. 
 
 CLEON. Then I'll set off this instant to the Senate ; 
 To inform them of your conspiracies and treasons, 
 Your secret nightly assemblies and cabals, 
 
 * A slap on the face of this kind is proverbial, in Spain, as the most 
 outrageous of all insults. 
 
 f In these passages, the poet marks the degradation of public oratory, 
 Jnfected with vulgar jargon and low metaphors,
 
 n8 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Your private treaty with the king of Persia, 
 
 Your correspondence with Boeotia, 
 
 And the business that you keep there in the cheese-press, 
 
 Close packed you think, and ripening out of sight. 
 
 S. S. Ah ! cheese ? Is cheese any cheaper there, d'ye 
 
 hear? 
 CLEON. By Hercules ! I'll have ye crucified ! 
 
 \Exit CLEON. 
 CHORUS to the S. S. 
 
 Well, how do you feel your heart and spirits now ? 
 Rouse up your powers ! If ever in your youth 
 You swindled and forswore as you profess ; 
 The time is come to show it. Now this instant 
 He's hurrying headlong to the Senate House ; 
 To tumble amongst them like a thunderbolt ; 
 To accuse us all, to rage, and storm, and rave. 
 
 S. S. Well, I'll be off then. But these guts and pudding, 
 I must put them by the while, and the chopping knife. 
 
 CHOR. Here take this lump of lard, to 'noint your neck 
 
 with; 
 
 The grease will give him the less hold upon you, 
 With the gripe of his accusations. 
 
 S. S. That's well thought of. 
 
 CHOR. And here's the garlic. Swallow it down ! 
 
 S. S. What for ? 
 
 CHOR. It will prime you up,* and make you fight the 
 
 better. 
 Make haste ! 
 
 S. S. Why, so I do. 
 
 CHOR. Remember now 
 
 Show blood and game. Drive at him and denounce him ! 
 Dash at his comb, his coxcomb, cuff it soundly ! 
 
 Game-cocks are dieted with garlic, see " Acharnians, " p. 21, Thcorus's 
 warning to Dicaeopolis, where a similar note should have been given.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. t! 9 
 
 Peck, scratch, and tear, conculcate, clapperclaw ! 
 Bite both his wattles off, and gobble 'em up ! 
 And then return in glory to your friends. 
 
 [Exit S. S. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Well may you speed 
 
 In word and deed. 
 
 May all the powers of the market-place 
 
 Grant ye protection, and help, and grace, 
 
 With strength of lungs and front and brain ; 
 
 With a crown of renown, to return again. 
 
 \turning to the audience} 
 But you that have heard and applauded us here, 
 
 In every style and in every way, 
 Grant us an ear, and attend for a while, 
 
 To the usual old anapaestic essay. 
 
 The following Parabasis has been already noticed (p. 44 of "The Achar- 
 nians ") in the long preliminary notice prefixed to the Parabasis of 
 that play ; but the inference which is there so concisely assumed in 
 the foot-note, will be better and more conveniently estimated, 
 when placed in juxtaposition with the composition itself. It has 
 been said, in brief and strong terms, that the poet had become the 
 poetical serf of the community. Our knowledge of antiquity is too 
 scanty, to enable us to define precisely the mode and degree of this 
 vassalage, to which he thus voluntarily subjected himself ; but it is 
 evident, that by demanding (as the text has it) a chorus for himself, 
 he was in effect doing that which is expressed in the translation, 
 namely, embracing a profession, from which he could not retreat. 
 The whole tenor of the following Parabasis turns upon the decisive 
 and irretrievable step, which the poet (after long hesitation, and 
 resisting the importunity of his friends) had at length determined to 
 take, undeterred by the discouraging example of his predecessors in 
 the same line, whom he enumerates and describes, devoting himself 
 irrevocably and exclusively to the composition of comedy. 
 
 Yet the poet was already publicly known as the author of three 
 comedies; "The Daitaleis," in which he had exhibited the contrast of 
 two young men, brothers : the one, steady and manly, according to 
 the old fashion, instructed in the old music and poetry, addicted to
 
 120 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 gymnastic exercises, living with his father in the country, a lover of 
 hunting and rural sports ; the other, a thoroughly depraved town 
 rake a scamp of that new school, of which Alcibiades was the 
 patron and the model ; aspiring to distinguish himself by foppery, 
 litigation, and speechifying. That excellent comedy of Cresset's, 
 " Le Mediant," maybe considered as somewhat analogous to this 
 produced with the same intention, and in a state of society and 
 manners not altogether dissimilar. 
 
 His second play, "The Babylonians," has been already mentioned (see 
 " Acharnians," p. 44) ; of this he was avowedly the author, and 
 had been held responsible for it, as we have already seen. 
 
 " The Acharnians," his third play, is generally speaking a comic pleading 
 in favour of peace ; but it includes a justification of the poet as the 
 author of the preceding play (distinctly and palpably in the Para- 
 basis, and in a burlesque form in other parts) ; for Dicasopolis in his 
 defence before the Chorus is the representative of the poet himself; 
 and that portion of the Chorus, which continues inveterate and un- 
 appeased, bring an accusation against him, which has no reference 
 to anything which has occurred in the preceding scenes of the same 
 play ; but which is distinctly applicable to the main purport and 
 argument of "The Babylonians" * (see "Acharnians," p. 40) 
 
 "Inveighing against informers." 
 
 The original, more scrupulously translated, would stand thus 
 alntsing any man that happened to be an informer, an offence, of 
 which the Dicaeopolis of " The Acharnians " (for the informer Nicar- 
 chus has not yet appeared) had been, up to this point at least, entirely 
 guiltless. Dicaeopolis then, in this instance, is a burlesque represen- 
 tative of the poet himself, put upon his trial for misdemeanours 
 perpetrated in a former play. His adversaries attack him, for having 
 stigmatized individuals as informers. The party who are become 
 favourable to him, justify him, by affirming the truth and correct- 
 ness of all his imputations. The reply to this is, that though they 
 might be true, he had no right to give publicity to scandalous and 
 offensive truths ; and that he deserves to be punished for it. There 
 is nothing in this altercation, which can in any way be made to bear 
 the slightest reference to anything that had occurred in the preceding 
 scenes of the play itself. 
 
 We have made a wide digression in our way to a very unsatisfactory 
 conclusion. It may be said: we see very clearly, from what has 
 
 It is noticed as having contained attacks upon a great number of 
 persons, 
 
 J
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 12 1 
 
 been already stated, that Aristophanes was already an avowed writer 
 for the comic theatre ; regarded as responsible for his productions, 
 when they were deemed objectionable ; justifying them himself in 
 person in the first instance, and afterwards under a feigned character, 
 in a subsequent drama. What then was the change in his condition 
 and prospects which was produced by demanding a chorus for 
 himself? a term as it appears of great import ; implying a devotion 
 of himself exclusively to the task of writing for the stage. What 
 were the emoluments and privileges attached to this profession of a 
 comic author, thus authentically assumed ? What, on the other hand, 
 were the disadvantages and disabilities, by which those privileges 
 and emoluments were counterbalanced ? This is a question, of which 
 the learning and industry of continental scholars may perhaps pro- 
 cure a solution, if they have not already afforded it, to those who 
 are conversant in the language and literature of Germany. But 
 something in the meanwhile may be deduced from the testimony of 
 the poet himself. It appears from the scene of Euripides in " The 
 Acharnians," that the author must have been entitled to the dresses 
 of the actors ; and his perquisites probably extended to the other 
 properties (as they are called) of the stage : with the exception of 
 those which were permanent and immovable. We find the poet 
 thus speaking of himself in the Parabasis of "The Peace," con- 
 trasting his own conduct with that of other cotemporary comic 
 authors he says (v. 763) : 
 
 " On former occasions he never made use 
 Of the credit he gained, to corrupt and seduce ; 
 But packed up his alls, after gaining the day, 
 Contented and joyous, and so went away." 
 
 We find, moreover, that the comic poets received a salary from the 
 State ; for in the play of " The Frogs," exhibited almost at the close 
 of the war, at a time of great pecuniary difficulty, it seems that their 
 pay was reduced. And the poet introduces his Chorus of happy 
 spirits in the Elysian fields, excommunicating the economists in 
 company with other reprobates and profane persons who are warned 
 to withdraw from the sacred rites : they include, in their interdict, 
 
 " All statesmen retrenching ihefees and the salaries 
 Of theatrical bards in revenge for the railleries 
 And jests and lampoons of this holy solemnity." 
 
 This appears evidently not to have been serious ; or if serious, would 
 have been very unreasonable ; for the retrenchment at that period 
 was universal, extending even to the omnipotent jurymen, who we"e 
 reduced from a daily pay of three oboli, to two. Whatever the
 
 ize THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 retrencnment may have been, it seems, as is suggested above, not to 
 have been one which was seriously complained of; and we may 
 safely infer, from the general munificence of the Athenians in all 
 matters of art, and from their peculiar passion for the theatre, that 
 in better and more prosperous times the allowances made to the 
 comic poets must have been sufficiently liberal at least to the three 
 successful competitors ; for there were three dramatic prizes, assigned 
 to the first, second, and third best play ; a circumstance, which of 
 itself implies a considerable pecuniary recompense ; for the third, 
 the least of all, must have been worth having in a pecuniary view ; 
 otherwise, to be ranked as a third-rate poet would have been felt as 
 an unqualified mortification. Supposing the prizes to have been 
 merely honorary, no third prize could have existed ; for it could 
 never have been considered as an honour. 
 
 From the question of emoluments we may turn to that of privileges 
 and immunities : and here, in the absence of positive authority, we 
 may be contented for the present with general inferences and 
 analogy. According to the notions of heathen antiquity, a professed 
 comic poet would have been considered as a person devoted to the 
 service of Bacchus ; a certain character of inviolability must there- 
 fore have been attached to him, in common with other persons 
 separated and set apart from the common concerns of the State, and 
 dedicated for life to the service of any other deity. Though mo- 
 dified no doubt in later times, this principle was essentially inherent 
 in the Grecian mind. The slaughter of a poet, " a servant of the 
 Muses," was condemned as an act of sacrilege ; and it was in these 
 terms, that the assassin of Archilochus was excommunicated by the 
 Oracle, and expelled from the temple, which he had presumed to 
 enter. It is not conceivable, that these feelings, however modified, 
 could have been altogether extinct, in the times of which we are now 
 treating ; and it is a singular fact, considering the enormous outrages 
 and attacks upon private character, perpetrated by the comic poets, 
 that (with the exception of the exploded fable of the death of 
 Eupolis) there is no trace to be met with of any personal vengeance 
 directed against any of them. The comic poets have been spoken 
 of above, as persons separate and set apart from the ordinary con- 
 cerns of the State ; and so they must have been, either by positive 
 law, or by established and authoritative custom j for it is not to be 
 supposed, that to any man standing in all other respects upon an 
 equal footing with his fellow-citizens, the privilege should have been 
 allowed of assailing them witli unlimited ribaldry and abuse. What- 
 ever may be thought of such a privilege in modern times, it was 
 certainly not consonant to the spirit of antiquity, to allow it to
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 123 
 
 be enjoyed by any individual, unaccompanied with corresponding 
 disabilities. The office of a comic poet, during the reign of the 
 Athenian democracy, has not been unaptly compared to that of the 
 court jester during the Middle Ages. They were both of them 
 authorized to take the most extraordinary liberties, in reflections on 
 the sovereign, and the highest persons in the State ; but theirs was a 
 situation obviously incompatible with the exercise of any other office 
 or privilege. The parallel may be carried further ; for it would 
 appear, from many recorded instances, that of these royal jesters 
 many must have been men, not only of a lively fancy and imagina- 
 tion, but of just feelings and a sound judgment, whose privileged 
 sallies occasionally directed the attention of the sovereign to truths 
 which could not have been conveyed to him by any other channel. 
 Aristophanes was certainly a most judicious though ineffectual ad- 
 viser to the multitudinous sovereign, whom it was his office to 
 amuse ; and Charles of Burgundy might have lived and died in 
 prosperity, if his counsels had been moderated by the sarcasms of 
 his jester. 
 
 But to return to our subject : thus far, in the absence of direct and 
 positive information, an attempt has been made, by conjecture and 
 inference, to define the new position in which the poet was placing 
 himself, as a member of the community to which he belonged ; 
 whether in this respect he had any reason to repent of his resolution, 
 it would be idle and superfluous to risk any conjecture ; but in 
 regard to his success as an author, the forebodings expressed in the 
 Parabasis appear to have been verified. Up to this time, while 
 unengaged and at liberty, he had been courted by the public, and 
 indulged with applause and success ; for the strong feeling excited 
 in the public by his play of "The Babylonians," at first hostile, 
 and gradually (like their representatives the Chorus of Acharnians) 
 subsiding into acquiescence and approbation, must have been felt as 
 more than an equivalent to the highest theatrical success. But he 
 was now irrevocably engaged in the service of the public : the first 
 prize, as a kind of premium for enlisting, was awarded to the present 
 play, the first which he exhibited as a regular writer for the stage ; 
 but from this time he was destined, like his predecessors, to ex- 
 perience the rigours and caprices of theatrical discipline. His next 
 play was "The Clouds," in which, following up the design of "The 
 Daitaleis," he had traced to its source that sudden change in morality 
 and manners, of which the outward manifestations had been exhi- 
 bited in the former play. This play of "The Clouds," which he 
 affirms (adjuring Bacchus as the patron deity of theatrical poets) to 
 have been the best that ever was written, was rejected. The play of
 
 U4 
 
 "The Wasps," in which he thus asseited the merit of " The Clouds," 
 was acted in the following year, and obtained the first prize. But we 
 find that another mortification had in the meanwhile befallen him, 
 in the diminished zeal and ardour of his friends he had been, as the 
 phrase is, " had tip" by Cleon before the Senate, and subjected to 
 the infliction of a severe invective ; during which time, he com- 
 plains, that his friends and partizans who were in attendance, and 
 upon whose countenance be depended, "had shown themselves 
 indifferent and even amused." They imagined, no doubt, that being 
 once engaged, he must go on. But he tells them, that he does not 
 mean to compromise himself to the same extent in future ; and 
 reminds them of the fable of the vine, which being left unsupported, 
 ceased to produce fruit (v. 1291) : 
 
 "So (the story says) the stake deserted and betrayed the vine." 
 
 Here then we trace a turn in the poet's mind ; he became less of a 
 public personage : and though his fancy and wit remained the same, 
 and his principles continued unchanged ; and though his courage 
 and spirit occasionally broke forth in public emergencies, yet having 
 adopted the stage as his occupation, he approached more nearly to 
 the common standard of theatrical writers ; and he might have made 
 the same complaint, which was uttered by Shakespeare : 
 
 " So that almost my nature is subdued 
 To what it deals in, like the dyer's hand." 
 
 But the text is already too much clogged with this long interpolation 
 of prose. We will not stop, therefore, to lament over the loss of 
 " The Daitaleis " and " The Babylonians," composed at an' earlier 
 period, and with an uubroken spirit. 
 
 But the money-loving spirit of our age manifests itself even in our 
 literary researches, and we cannot refrain, even with respect to an 
 ancient poet who lived 2303 years ago, from the invariable inquiry 
 What i?a j he wo > th f It maybe inferred then, from grounds of 
 presumption too long to be detailed here, that he must have belonged 
 to the class of the knights. Now the knights were rated (according 
 to the modus fixed by Solon) at an amount of 300 bushels of corn- 
 But how rated ? As for the sum total of their income ? Or as 
 being that portion of it, which in cases of emergency was exigible 
 for the service of the State ? Those students of antiquity, who are 
 not endowed with the faculty of digesting gross absurdities, are 
 under great obligations to Mr. Boeck, for having relieved them from 
 the cruel necessity of being constrained to believe, that a man with 
 j75 a year (taking corn at five shillings a bushel) was bound to keep 
 a war-horse, and to serve in the cavalry at his own expense ; or that
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 125 
 
 another with an income of ^225 (estimated according to the same 
 permanent standard of value) could have been charged with the 
 expenses of a ship of war a proposition, we conceive, wholly con- 
 tradictory to the experience of the members of the Yacht Club. 
 Mr. Boeck has shown, that these sums were the extreme rates of 
 taxation to which the individuals of these classes were subject ; a 
 rate which was not always exacted in full ; and which we may 
 suppose, at the utmost, to have been a double tithe, or four shillings 
 in the pound, a rate of taxation to which, in difficult times, our own 
 country was contented to submit. The elucidation of this point is 
 by far the greatest service which Mr. Boeck has rendered to ancient 
 literature, in the whole of his accurate and learned work. To have 
 dissipated these misapprehensions, which, as long as they were im- 
 plicitly adopted, diffused an air of utter incredibility and unreality 
 over the whole system of antiquity, is a result far mere important 
 than the development of details hitherto unknown and unexamined. 
 
 This discussion, already too long, has been prolonged thus far for the 
 sake of restating Mr. Boeck's discovery ; which has been un- 
 accountably overlooked in a recent publication. 
 
 With respect to the poet, we may safely conclude, that he was in 
 tolerably easy circumstances ; and we find accordingly that he was 
 able to give away some of his plays with their contingent emolu. 
 ments : among the rest the very play ("The Frogs") in which he 
 complained of the new retrenchment, and denounced an anathema 
 against the economists. 
 
 PARABASIS. 
 
 If a veteran author had wished to engage 
 
 Our assistance to-day, for a speech from the stage ; 
 
 We scarce should have granted so bold a request ; 
 
 But this author of ours, as the bravest and best, 
 
 Deseryes an indulgence denied to the rest. 
 
 For the courage and vigour, the scorn and the hate, 
 
 With which he encounters the pests of the State ; 
 
 A thorough-bred seaman, intrepid and warm, 
 
 Steering outright, in the face of the storm. 
 
 But now for the gentle reproaches he bore 
 On the part of his friends, for refraining before 
 To embrace the profession, embarking for life 
 In theatrical storms and poetical strife.
 
 I 2 6 THE KNIGHTS, 
 
 He begs us to state, th.it for reasons of weight, 
 He has lingered so long, and determined so late. 
 For he deemed the achievements of comedy hard, 
 The boldest attempt of a desperate bard ! 
 The Muse he perceived was capricious and coy, 
 Though many were courting her few could enjoy. 
 And he saw without reason, from season to season, 
 Your humour would shift, and turn poets adrift, 
 Requiting old friends with unkindness and treason, 
 Discarded in scorn as exhausted and worn. 
 
 Seeing Magnes's fate, who was reckoned of late 
 For the conduct of comedy captain and head; 
 That so oft on the stage, in the flower of his age, 
 Had defeated the Chorus his rivals had led ; 
 With his sounds of all sort, that were uttered in sport, 
 With whims and vagaries unheard of before, 
 With feathers and wings, and a thousand gay things, 
 That in frolicsome fancies his Choruses wore 
 When his humour was spent, did your temper relent, 
 To requite the delight that he gave you before ? 
 We beheld him displaced, and expelled and disgraced, 
 When his hair and his wit were grown aged and hoar. 
 
 Then he saw, for a sample, the dismal example 
 Of noble Cratinus so splendid and ample, 
 Full of spirit and blood, and enlarged like a flood ; 
 Whose copious current tore down with its torrent, 
 Oaks, ashes and yew, with the ground where they grew, 
 And his rivals to boot, wrenched up by the root ; 
 And his personal foes, who presumed to oppose, 
 All drowned and abolished, dispersed and demolished, 
 And drifted headlong, with a deluge of song. 
 
 And his airs and his tunes, and his songs and lampoons, 
 Were recited and sung, by the old and the young 
 At our feasts and carousals what poet but he ? 
 And " The fair Amphibribe " and " The Sycophant Tree,"
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 127 
 
 " Masters and masons and builders of verse ! " 
 Those were the tunes that all tongues could rehearse; 
 But since in decay, you have cast him away, 
 Stript of his stops and his musical strings, 
 Battered and shattered, a broken old instrument, 
 Shoved out of sight among rubbishy things. 
 
 His garlands are faded, and what he deems worst, 
 His tongue and his palate are parching with thirst ; 
 
 And now you may meet him alone in the street, 
 Wearied and worn, tattered and torn, 
 All decayed and forlorn, in his person and dress ; 
 
 Whom his former success should exempt from distress. 
 With subsistence at large, at the general charge, 
 And a seat with the great, at the table of state,* 
 There to feast every day, and preside at the play 
 In splendid apparel, triumphant and gay. 
 
 Seeing Crates the next, always teased and perplexed, 
 With your tyrannous temper tormented and vexed ; 
 That with taste and good sense, without waste or expense, 
 From his snug little hoard, provided your board, 
 With a delicate treat, economic and neat 
 
 Thus hitting or missing, with crowns or with hissing, 
 Year after year, he pursued his career, 
 For better or worse, till he finished his course. 
 
 These precedents held him in long hesitation ; 
 He replied to his friends, with a just observation, 
 " That a seaman in regular order is bred, 
 To the oar, to the helm, and to look out ahead ; 
 With diligent practice has fixed in his mind 
 The signs of the weather, and changes of wind. 
 And when every point of the service is known, 
 Undertakes the command of a ship of his own." 
 
 * The Prytaneum.
 
 I2 8 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 For reasons like these, 
 
 If your judgment agrees, 
 
 That he did not embark, 
 
 Like an ignorant spark, : 
 
 Or a troublesome lout, 
 
 To puzzle and bother, and blunder about, 
 
 Give him a shout, 
 
 At his first setting out ! 
 
 And all pull away 
 
 With a hearty huzza 
 
 For success to the play ! 
 
 Send him away, 
 
 Smiling and gay, 
 
 Shining and florid, 
 
 With his bald forehead ! 
 
 The text contains nearly all that is known of two of the three poets here 
 mentioned, Magnes and Crates ; the last is recorded, as having be- 
 come distinguished in the second year of the 82 Olymp., thirty-six 
 years before the exhibition of " The Knights " : Magnes must have 
 been older. Of Cratinus some few fragments are still in existence : he 
 lived to vindicate himself from the offensive commiseration here be- 
 stowed him, by gaining the first prize in the next year, when the 
 comedy of "The Clouds" was rejected. 
 
 STROPHE. 
 
 Neptune, lord of land and deep, 
 From the lofty Sunian steep, 
 
 With delight surveying 
 The fiery-footed steeds, 
 
 Frolicking and neighing 
 As their humour leads 
 
 And rapid cars contending 
 
 Venturous and forward, 
 
 Where splendid youths are spending 
 The money that they borrowed. 
 
 Thence downward to the ocean,
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 129 
 
 And the calmer show 
 Of the dolphin's motion 
 
 In the depths below ; 
 And the glittering galleys 
 
 Gallantly that steer, 
 When the squadron sallies, 
 
 With wages in arrear. 
 List, O list ! 
 Listen and assist, 
 
 Thy Chorus here! '., ( 
 
 Mighty Saturn's son ! 
 The support of Phormion,* 
 
 In his victories of late ; 
 
 To the fair Athenian State 
 
 More propitious far, 
 
 Than all the gods that are, ^ 
 
 In the present war. 
 
 EPIRREMA. 
 
 Let us praise our famous fathers, let their glory be recorded 
 On Minerva's mighty mantlet consecrated and embroidered. 
 That with many a naval action and with infantry by 
 
 land, 
 Still contending, never ending, strove for empire and 
 
 command. 
 When they met the foe, disdaining to compute a poor 
 
 account 
 Of the number of their armies, of their muster and amount : 
 
 * A most able and successful naval commander. 
 
 f This mantle was an enormous piece of tapestry adorned with the 
 actions and figures of the naval heroes and protecting deities. It was re- 
 newed every year ; and was carried to the temple, at the Pariathenaic 
 procession, suspended and displayed from a tall mast fixed on a movable 
 carriage See Mr. Wordsworth's "Attica," p. 184.
 
 ,30 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 But whene'er at wrestling matches * they were worsted in 
 
 the fray ; 
 Wiped their shoulders from the dust, denied the fall, and 
 
 fought away. 
 Then the generals t never claimed precedence, or a 
 
 separate seat, 
 Like the present mighty captains ; or the public wine or 
 
 meat. 
 
 As for us, the sole pretension suited to our birth and years, 
 Is with resolute intention, as determined volunteers, 
 To defend our fields and altars, as our fathers did before ; 
 Claiming as a recompense this easy boon, and nothing 
 
 more : 
 When our trials with peace are ended, not to view us with 
 
 malignity ; 
 When we're curried, sleek and pampered, prancing in our 
 
 pride and dignity. 
 
 ANTISTROPHE. 
 
 It will be seen that there is a want of correspondence and proportion 
 between the strophe and antistrophe ; the first has been enlarged, to 
 give scope for the development of the poetic imagery, tinged with 
 burlesque, which appears in the original. In atonement for this 
 irregularity, the antistrophe, which offered no such temptation, is 
 given as an exact nutrical facsimile of the orignal. In this respect, 
 it may at least have some merit as a curiosity. The only variation 
 consists in a triple, instead of a double, rhyme. 
 
 Mighty Minerva ! thy command 
 Rules and upholds this happy land ; 
 Attica, famed in every part, 
 With a renown for arms and art, 
 
 Thirty-two years before this time, the Athenians, after being foiled in a 
 great battle at Tanagra, risked another general action at Oinophuta, in 
 which they were victorious, only sixty-two days after the first ! " Fasti 
 Hellenic)," Ol. 81. 
 
 t Tolmides and Myronides, who commanded in the battles here 
 alluded to.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 131 
 
 Noted among the nations. 
 Victory bring the bard's delight ; 
 She that in faction or in fight, 
 
 Aids us on all occasions. 
 
 Goddess, list to the song ! Bring her away with thee, 
 Haste and bring her along ! Here to the play with thee. 
 
 Bring fair Victory down for us ! 
 
 Bring her here with a crown for us ! 
 
 Come with speed, as a friend indeed, 
 
 Now or never at our need ! 
 
 ANTEPIRREMA. 
 
 It is observabie, that the antepirrema is generally in a lower and less 
 serious tone than its preceding epirrema ; as if the poet were, or 
 thought it right to appear, apprehensive of having been over-earnest 
 in his first address. In the present instance, as the poetical advocate 
 of his party, he had already stated their claims to public confidence 
 and favour ; and, in the concluding lines, had deprecated the jealousy 
 and envy to which they were exposed. He now wishes to give a 
 striking instance of their spirit and alacrity in the service of the 
 country ; and it is given accordingly, in the most uninvidious manner, 
 in a tone of extravagant burlesque humour. 
 
 Let us sing the mighty deeds of our illustrious noble steeds. 
 
 They deserve a celebration for their service heretofore, 
 
 Charges and attacks, exploits enacted in the days of yore : 
 
 These, however, strike me less, as having been performed 
 ashore. 
 
 But the wonder was to see them, when they fairly went 
 aboard, 
 
 With canteens and bread and onions, victualled and com- 
 pletely stored, 
 
 Then they fixed and dipped their oars beginning all to shout 
 and neigh, 
 
 Just the same as human creatures, " Pull away, boys ! Pull 
 away ! " 
 
 E 2
 
 I3 2 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 " Bear a hand there, Roan and Sorrel ! Have a care there, 
 
 Black and Bay ! 
 Then they leapt ashore at Corinth ; and the lustier younger 
 
 sort 
 Strolled about to pick up litter,* for their solace and 
 
 disport : 
 And devoured the crabs of Corinth, as a substitute for 
 
 clover. 
 So that a poetic Crabbe,t exclaimed in anguish " All is 
 
 over ! 
 What awaits us, mighty Neptune, if we cannot hope to 
 
 keep 
 From pursuit and persecution in the land or in the deep." 
 
 The poet Carkinus (Crab) had produced a tragedy, on the subject of the 
 daughter of a king of Corinth ; who merely, from bathing in the sen, 
 had become unconsciously pregnant by Neptune. The lines here 
 quoted from it were a complaint of the impossibility of preserving 
 the honour of illustrious families from the licentious aggressions of 
 the gods. 
 
 CHOR. \to the SAUSAGE-SELLER]. 
 O best of men ! thou tightest heartiest fellow ! 
 What a terror and alarm had you created 
 In the hearts of all your friends by this delay. 
 But since at length in safety you return, 
 Say what was the result of your attempt. 
 
 S. S. The result is ; you may call me Nickoboulus ; 
 For I've nicked the Boule there, the Senate, capitally. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Then we may chant amain 
 In an exulting strain, 
 
 The usual licentious excesses of an invading army. 
 t The poet Carkinus.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 133 
 
 With ecstasy triumphant bold and high, 
 
 O thou ! 
 That not in words alone, or subtle thought, 
 
 But more in manly deed, 
 Hast merited, and to fair achievement brought ! 
 Relate at length and tell 
 The event as it befell : 
 So would I gladly pass a weary way ; 
 Nor weary would it seem, 
 Attending to the theme, 
 Of all the glories of this happy day. 
 [/ a familiar tone, as if dapping him on ihe shoulder] 
 *Come, my jolly worthy fellow, never fear ! 
 We're all delighted with you let us hear ! 
 
 S. S. Aye, aye It's well worth hearing, I can tell ye : 
 I followed after him to the Senate House; 
 And there was he, storming, and roaring, driving 
 His thunderbolts about him, bowling down 
 His biggest words, to crush the cavaliers, 
 Like stones from a hill-top ; calling them traitors, 
 Conspirators what not? There sat the Senate 
 With their arms folded, and their eyebrows bent, 
 And their lips puckered, with the grave aspect 
 Of persons utterly humbugged and bamboozled. 
 
 Seeing the state of things, I paused awhile, 
 Praying in secret with an under voice : 
 " Ye influential impudential powers 
 Of sauciness and jabber, slang a d jaw ! 
 Ye spirits of the market-place and street, 
 Where I was reared and bred befriend me now ! 
 Grant me a voluble utterance, and a vast 
 Unbounded voice, and steadfast impudence ! " 
 
 * The encouragement which the poet administers, to himself in fact, is 
 not out of place ; he is preparing to attack the Senate, with the most con- 
 temptuous ridicule.
 
 I 34 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Whilst I thus thought and prayed, on the right hand, 
 I heard a sound of wind distinctly broken ! 
 I seized the omen at once ; and bouncing up, 
 I burst among the crowd, and bustled through, 
 And bolted in at the wicket, and bawled out : 
 " News ! news ! I've brought you news ! the best of 
 
 news ! 
 
 Yes, Senators, since first the war began, 
 There never has been known, till now this morning, 
 Such a haul of pilchards." Then they smiled and seemed 
 All tranquillized and placid at the prospect 
 Of pilchards being likely to be cheap. 
 I then proceeded and proposed a vote 
 To meet the emergence secretly and suddenly : 
 To seize at once the trays of all the workmen, 
 And go with them to market to buy pilchards, 
 Before the price was raised. Immediately 
 They applauded, and sat gaping all together, 
 Attentive and admiring. He perceived it ; 
 And framed a motion, suited as he thought 
 To the temper of the Assembly. " I move," says he, 
 " That on occasion of this happy news, 
 We should proclaim a general thanksgiving ; 
 With a festival moreover, and a sacrifice 
 Of a hundred head of oxen ; to the goddess." 
 
 Then seeing he meant to drive me to the wall 
 With his hundred oxen, I overbid him at once ; 
 And said " two hundred," and proposed a vow, 
 For a thousand goats to be offered to Diana, 
 Whenever sprats should fall to forty a penny. 
 With that the Senate smiled upon me again ; 
 And he grew stupefied and lost, and stammering ; 
 And attempting to interrupt the current business, 
 Was called to order, and silenced and put down. 
 
 Then they were breaking up to buy their pilchards :
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 135 
 
 But he must needs persist, and beg for a. hearing- 
 
 <l For a single moment for a messenger 
 
 For a herald that was come from Lacedaemon, 
 
 With an offer of peace for an audience to be given him." 
 
 But they broke out in an uproar all together : 
 
 " Peace truly ! Peace forsooth ! Yes, now's their time ; 
 
 I warrant 'em ; when pilchards are so plenty. 
 
 They've heard of it ; and now they come for peace ! 
 
 No ! No ! No peace ! The war must take its course." 
 
 Then they called out to the Presidents to adjourn ; 
 
 And scrambled over the railing and dispersed ; 
 
 And I dashed down to the market-place headlong ; 
 
 And bought up all the fennel, and bestowed it 
 
 As donative, for garnish to their pilchards, 
 
 Among the poorer class of Senators ; 
 
 And they so thanked and praised me, that in short, 
 
 For twenty-pence, I've purchased and secured them. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 With fair event your first essay began, 
 Betokening a predestined happy man. 
 The villain now shall meet 
 
 In equal war, 
 A more accomplished cheat, 
 
 A viler far; 
 
 With -turns and tricks more various, 
 More artful and nefarious. 
 But thou ! 
 Bethink thee now ; 
 Rouse up thy spirit to the next endeavour 1 
 
 Our hands and hearts and will, 
 Both heretofore and ever, 
 
 Are with thee still. 
 
 S. S. The Paphlagonian ! Here he's coming, foaming 
 And swelling like a breaker in the surf 1
 
 136 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 With his hobgoblin countenance and look \ 
 
 For all the world as if he'd swallow me up. 
 
 Enter CLEON. 
 
 CLEON. May I perish and rot, but I'll Consume and 
 
 ruin ye ; 
 I'll leave no trick, no scheme untried to do it 
 
 S. S. It makes me laugh, it amuses one, to see him 
 Bluster and storm ! I whistle and snap my fingers. 
 
 CLEON. By the powers of earth and heaven! and as I 
 
 live ! 
 You villain, I'll annihilate and devour ye. 
 
 S. S. Devour me ! and as I live, I'll swallow ye j 
 And gulp ye down at a mouthful, without salt. 
 
 CLEON. I swear by the precedence, and the seat 
 Which I achieved at Pylos, I'll destroy ye. 
 
 S. S. Seat, precedence truly ! I hope to see you, 
 The last amongst us in the lowest place. 
 
 CLEON. I'll clap you in jail, in the stocks By heaven ! 
 I will. 
 
 S. S. To see it how it takes on ! Barking and tearing ! 
 What ails the creature ? Does it want a sop ? 
 
 CLEON. I'll claw your guts out, with these nails of 
 mine. 
 
 S. S. I'll pare those nails of yours, from clawing victuals 
 At the public table. 
 
 CLEON. I'll drag you to the Assembly 
 
 This instant, and accuse ye, and have you punished. 
 
 S. S. And I'll bring accusations there against you, 
 Twenty for one, and worse than yours tenfold. 
 
 CLEON. Aye my poor soul ! but they won't mind ye or 
 
 hear ye, 
 Whilst I can manage 'em and make fools of 'em. 
 
 S. S. You reckon they belong to ye, I suppose ? 
 
 CLEON. Why should not they, if I feed and diet 'em ?
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 137 
 
 S. S. Aye, aye, and like the liquorish greedy nurses, 
 You swallow ten for one yourself at least, 
 For every morsel the poor creatures get. 
 
 CLEON. Moreover, in doing business in the Assembly, 
 I have such a superior influence and command, 
 That I can make them close and hard and dry, 
 Or pass a matter easily, as I please. 
 
 S. S. Moreover, in doing business my band, 
 Has the same sort of influence and command ; 
 And plays at fast and loose, just as it pleases. 
 
 CLEON. You sha'n't insult as you did before the Senate. 
 Come, come, before the Assembly. 
 
 S. S. [coolly and drily\. Aye yes why not ? 
 With all my heart ! Let's go there What should hinder us ? 
 
 \Thc scene is supposed to be in front of DEMUS'S house^\ 
 
 CLEON. My dear good Demus, do step out a moment ! 
 
 S. S. My dearest little Demus, do step out ! 
 
 DEM. Who's there? Keep off! What a racket are you 
 
 making ; 
 
 Bawling and caterwauling about the door ; 
 To affront the house, and scandalize the neighbours. 
 
 CLEON. Come out, do see yourself, how I'm insulted. 
 
 DEM. Oh, my poor Paphlagonian ! What's the matter ? 
 Who has affronted ye ? 
 
 CLEON. I'm waylaid and beaten, 
 
 By that rogue there, and the rake-helly young fellows, 
 All for your sake. 
 
 DEM. How so ? 
 
 CLEON. Because I love you, 
 
 And court you, and wait on you, to win your favour. 
 
 DEM. And you there, sirrah ! tell me what are you ? 
 
 S. S.* A lover of yours, and a rival of his, this long 
 time; 
 
 * Very rapidly and eagerly.
 
 138 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 That have wished to oblige ye and serve ye in every way : 
 
 And many there are besides, good gentlefolks, 
 
 That adore ye, and wish to pay their court to ye ; 
 
 But he contrives to baffle and drive them off, 
 
 In short, you're like the silly spendthrift heirs, 
 
 That keep away from civil well-bred company, 
 
 To pass their time with grooms and low companions, 
 
 Cobblers, and curriers, tanners and such like. 
 
 CLEON. And have not I merited that preference, 
 By my service ? 
 
 S. S. In what way ? 
 
 CLEON. By bringing back 
 
 The Spartan captives tied and bound from Pylos. 
 
 S. S. And would not I bring back from the cook's shop 
 A mess of meat that belonged to another man ? 
 
 CLEON. Well, Demus, call an Assembly then directly, 
 To decide between us, which is your best friend ; 
 And when you've settled it, fix and keep to him. 
 
 [Exit CLEON. 
 
 S. S. Ah, do ! pray do decide ! but not in the Pnyx 
 
 DEM. It must be there ; it can't be anywhere else ; 
 It's quite impossible : you must go to the Pnyx. 
 
 S. S. Oh dear ! I'm lost and ruined then ! the old fellow 
 Is sharp and clever enough in his own home ; 
 But planted with his rump upon that rock, 
 He grows completely stupefied and bothered. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Now you must get your words and wit, and all your tackle 
 
 ready, 
 To make a dash, but don't be rash, be watchful, bold and 
 
 steady. 
 You've a nimble adversary, shifting, and alert, and wary. 
 
 \The scene changes and discovers the Pnyx with 
 CLEON on the Bema, in an oration a I attitude, .]
 
 7 HE KNIGHTS. 139 
 
 *Look out ! have a care ! behold him there 1 
 He's bearing upon you be ready, prepare. 
 Out with the dolphin ! Haul it hard ! 
 Away with it up to the peak of the yard ! 
 And out with the pinnacef to serve for a guard. 
 
 Cleon's exordium appears to be marked in the original by a trait of 
 humour which it is impossible to translate or to represent by an 
 equivalent. The true version is as follows : " I pray to the goddess 
 Minerva, my own patroness, and the protecting deity of the city; 
 that if I stand as a meritorious statesman, in the next rank to 
 Lysicles,t Cynna and Salabaccha ; I may be allowed to continue 
 dining in the Prytaneum, &c. &c. 
 
 It should seem that the three discreditable names are substituted for 
 those of Pericles, Cymon, and Themistocies, with whom it appears 
 that Cleon was in the habit of comparing himself; for we shall see 
 that in the present scene he is attacked for having presumed to 
 place himself in parallel with Themistocies. 
 
 * Observe that the change of the scene is accompanied by the idea of 
 naval manoeuvre. The ancient theatres being open at top, the machinery 
 was worked from below ; so that with the help of a little imagination the 
 stage might at such a moment be thought to resemble the deck of a ship. 
 Observe too, that as by the change of scene and its transfer to the Pnyx 
 (which had been deprecated by the Sausage-seller) the advantage is sup- 
 posed to be transferred to the less ignoble character, the metre changes 
 from the tetrameter iambic to the anapaest, as in the scenes of altercation 
 in the other comedies, where the ascendency of the noble or ignoble 
 personage or argument, is marked by a change of the metre ; though the 
 scenes which follow may perhaps be considered as an exception ; for the 
 Sausage-seller has the better even in the anapaest ; but his complete triumph 
 is reserved for the tetrameter. 
 
 t The image is that of a merchant vessel defending itself against the 
 attack of a ship of war : the pinnace was interposed to break the shock of 
 the enemy's prow ; and the dolphin, a huge mass of lead, was raised to a 
 great height, at the end of the yard of the enormous lateen sail (still to be 
 seen in some large old-fashioned craft in the Mediterranean). It was then 
 dropped suddenly at the moment of contact, to sink the enemy's vessel by 
 bursting a hole through it. 
 
 t A statesman of very low repute, who had come forward after the 
 death of Pericles, but speedily sunk into discredit. 
 
 5 Two eminent prostitutes.
 
 I 4 o THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 It is natural therefore to conclude, that with respect to the two oiher 
 
 illustrious, but less extraordinary characters, he must have felt still 
 
 less scrupulous. 
 The phrase therefore stands as a contemptuous caricature of Cleon's 
 
 arrogance. He had spoken of himself as the most meritorious 
 
 public character : 
 
 (J.CTO. HeptK\ea ical Kt/xwva Kal QffJU<rroK\ea. 
 The taunting parody of the poet says : 
 
 /uera Ai/crwcXea Kal Kuvvav Kal 2aXa/3cucx aj '' 
 
 We see that the two first names have a similarity in sound to those for 
 which they were substituted (Pericles, Lysicles Cymon, Cynna). 
 And we may be sure that an exact mimicry of Cleon's manner, and 
 tone of voice, would not have been wanting to make the caricature 
 as manifest as possible. 
 
 To those who have formed a just estimate of the merits of Aristophanes, 
 this explanation of the passage will not appear unnecessary. It 
 occurs in the most striking part of the play, at the very point to 
 which the attention of the audience had been directed ; but surely 
 the most implicit admiration for everything ancient cannot prevent 
 us from perceiving, that, unexplained as it has been hitherto, it 
 appears vapid and senseless in the extreme. We might safely defy 
 the dullest individual to make a poorer attempt at a joke in his 
 own person. 
 
 If, on the contrary, we suppose the passage in question to have contained 
 a verbal burlesque heightened by personal mimicry, the audience 
 would hardly have felt a deficiency of amusement at this particular 
 point of the representation. 
 
 CLEON. To Minerva the sovereign goddess I call, 
 Our guide and defender, the hope of us all ; 
 With a prayer and a vow, that, even as now, 
 If I'm truly your friend, unto my life's end, 
 I may dine in the hall, doing nothing at all ! 
 But, if I despise you, or ever advise you, 
 Against what is best, for your comfort and rest ; 
 Or neglect to attend you, defend you, befriend you, 
 May I perish and pine ; may this carcase of mine 
 Be withered and dried, and curried beside ; 
 And straps for your harness cut out from the hide.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 141 
 
 S. S. Then, Demus if I, tell a word of a lie ; 
 If any man more can dote or adore, 
 With so tender a care, I make it my prayer, 
 My prayer and my wish, to be stewed in a dish ; 
 To be sliced and slashed, minced and hashed ; 
 And the offal remains that are left by the cook, 
 Dragged out to the grave, with my own flesh-hook. 
 
 CLEON. O Demus! has any man shown such a 
 
 zeal, 
 
 Such a passion as I for the general weal ? 
 Racking and screwing offenders to ruin ; 
 With torture and threats extorting your debts ; 
 Exhausting all means for enhancing your fortune, 
 Terror and force and intreaties importune, 
 With a popular, pure, patriotical aim ; 
 Unmoved by compassion, or friendship, or shame. 
 
 S. S. All this I can do ; more handily too ; 
 With ease and despatch ; I can pilfer and snatch, 
 And supply ye with loaves from another man's batch. 
 
 But now, to detect his saucy neglect ; 
 (In spite of the boast, of his loyalty due, 
 Is the boiled and the roast, to your table and you.) 
 You that in combat at Marathon sped, 
 And hewed down your enemies hand over head, 
 The Mede and the Persian, achieving a treasure 
 Of infinite honour and profit and pleasure, :r > 3 d ' 
 
 Rhetorical praises and tragical phrases ; 
 Of rich panegyric a capital stock 
 He leaves you to rest on a seat of the rock, 
 Naked and bare, without comfort or care. 
 Whilst I look ye there I have quilted and wadded, 
 And tufted and padded this cushion so neat 
 To serve for your seat ! Rise now, let me slip 
 It there under your hip, that on board of the ship, 
 With the toil of the oar, was blistered and sore,
 
 142 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Enduring the burthen and heat of the day, 
 At the battle of Salamis working away. 
 
 DEM. Whence was it you came ! Oh, tell me your 
 
 name 
 
 Your name and your birth ; for your kindness and worth 
 Bespeak you indeed of a patriot breed ; 
 Of the race of Harmodius* sure you must be, 
 So popular, gracious and friendly to me. 
 
 CLEON. Can he win you with ease, with such trifles as 
 these ? 
 
 S. S. With easier trifles you manage to please. 
 
 CLEON. I vow notwithstanding, that never a man 
 Has acted since first the republic began, 
 On a more patriotical popular plan : 
 And if any man else can as truly be said 
 The friend of the people, I'll forfeit my head ; 
 I'll make it a wager, and stand to the pledge. 
 
 S. >S. And what is the token you mean to allege 
 Of that friendship of yours, or the good it ensures ? 
 Eight seasons are past that he shelters his head 
 In a barrack, an outhouse, a hovel, a shed, 
 In nests of the rock where the vultures are bred, 
 In tubs, and in huts and the towers of the wall : 
 His friend and protector, you witness it all ! 
 But where is thy pity, thou friend of the city ; 
 To smoke him alive, to plunder his hive ? 
 And when Archeptolemusf came on a mission, 
 With peace in his hand, with a fair proposition : 
 So drive them before you with lycks on the rump, 
 Peace, treaties and embassies, all in a lump ! 
 
 CLEON. I did wisely and well ; for the prophecies tell, 
 That if he perseveres, for a period of years ; 
 
 
 
 The assassin of Hipparchus, canonized by the democratic fanaticism of 
 the Athenians. 
 
 f After the surrender of the Spartans at Pylos.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 143 
 
 He shall sit in Arcadia, judging away 
 In splendour and honour, at five-pence a day : 
 Meantime I can feed and provide for his need ; 
 Maintaining him wholly, fairly and foully, 
 With jurymen's pay, three-pence a day. 
 
 S. S. No vision or fancy prophetic have you, 
 Nor .dreams of Arcadian empire in view ; 
 A safer concealment is all that you seek : 
 In the hubbub of war, in the darkness and reek, 
 To plunder at large ; to keep him confined, 
 Passive, astounded, humbled, blind, 
 Pining in penury, looking to thee, 
 For his daily provision a juryman's fee. 
 But if he returns to his country concerns, 
 His grapes and his figs, and his furmity kettle, 
 You'll find him a man of a different mettle. 
 When he feels that your fees had debarred him from 
 
 these ; 
 
 He'll trudge up to town, looking eagerly down, 
 And pick a choice pebble, and keep it in view, 
 As a token of spite,* for a vote against you. 
 Peace sinks you for ever, you feel it and know, 
 As your shifts and your tricks and your prophecies show. 
 CLEON. Tis a scandal, a shame ! to throw slander and 
 
 blame 
 
 On the friend of the people ! a patriot name, 
 A kinder protector, I venture to say, 
 
 * "As a token of spite:" that is, as a memorandum of anticipated 
 vengeance. It is recorded of some old Frenchman, in the early times ol 
 the last century, that having suffered in his fortune by the depreciation of 
 the coinage, he set apart a gold piece of the old stamp ; and used to show 
 it to his friends, saying " that he kept it for the hire of a balcony looking 
 into the Place de Greve, against the time when the minister should be 
 brought out there for execution." With a similar feeling the Athenian 
 countryman is described as selecting his pebble for a future vindictive vote 
 against Cleon.
 
 I 4 4 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Than ever Themistocles was in his day, 
 Better and kinder in every way. 
 
 S. S. Witness, ye deities ! witness his blasphemies ! 
 You to compare with Themistocles ! you ! 
 That found us exhausted, and filled us anew 
 With a bumper of opulence ; carving and sharing 
 Rich slices of empire ; and kindly preparing, 
 While his guests were at dinner, a capital supper, 
 With a dainty remove, both under and upper, 
 The fort and the harbour, and many a dish 
 Of colonies, islands, and such kind of fish. 
 But now we are stunted, our spirit is blunted, 
 With paltry defences, and walls of partition ; 
 With silly pretences of poor superstition ; 
 And yet you can dare, with him to compare ! 
 But he lost the command, and was banished the land, 
 While you rule over all, and carouse in the hall ! 
 
 CLEON. This is horrible quite, and his slanderous spite, 
 Has no motive in view but my friendship for you, 
 My zeal 
 
 DEM. There have done with your slang and your 
 
 stuff, 
 You've cheated and choused and cajoled me enough. 
 
 S. S. My dear little Demus ! you'll find it is true. 
 He behaves like a wretch and a villain to you. 
 He haunts your garden and there he plies, 
 Cropping the sprouts of the young supplies, 
 Munching and scrunching enormous rations 
 Of public sales and confiscations. 
 
 CLEON. Don't exult before your time, 
 Before you've answered for your crime 
 A notable theft that I mean to prove 
 Of a hundred talents and above. 
 
 S. S. Why do ye plounce and flounce in vain ? 
 Splashing and dashing and splashing again,
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 145 
 
 Like a silly recruit, just clapped on board ? 
 
 Your crimes and acts are on record : 
 
 The Mitylenian bribe alone 
 
 Was forty minse proved and shown. , 
 
 T 
 
 CHORUS.* 
 
 O thou, the saviour of the State, with joy and admiration ! 
 We contemplate your happy fate and future exaltation, 
 Doomed with the trident in your hand to reign in power 
 
 and glory, 
 
 In full career to domineer, to drive the world before ye ; 
 To raise with ease and calm the seas, and also raise a 
 
 fortune, 
 While distant tribes, with gifts and bribes, to thee will be 
 
 resorting. 
 Keep your advantage, persevere, attack him, work him, 
 
 bait him, 
 
 You'll over-bawl him, never fear, and out-vociferate him. 
 CLEON. You'll not advance ; you've not a chance, good 
 
 people, of prevailing; 
 Recorded facts, my warlike acts, will muzzle you from 
 
 railing ; 
 
 As long as there remains a shield, of all the trophy taken 
 At Pylos, I can keep the field, unterrified, unshaken. 
 S. S. Stop there a bit, don't triumph yet those shields 
 
 afford a handle 
 
 For shrewd surmise ; and it implies a treasonable scandal ; 
 That there they're placed, all strapped and braced, ready 
 
 prepared for action ; 
 
 A plot it is ! a scheme of his ! a project of the faction ! 
 Dear Demus, he, most wickedly, with villanous advise- 
 ment, 
 
 * The metre now passes from the anapaest to the tetrameter iambic. See 
 p. 139, note.
 
 I 4 6 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Prepares a force, as his resource, against your just chastise- 
 ment : 
 The curriers and the tanners all, with sundry crafts of 
 
 leather, 
 Young lusty fellows stout and tall, you see them leagued 
 
 together ; 
 And there beside them, there abide cheesemongers bold 
 
 and hearty, 
 
 Who with the grocers are allied, to join the tanner's party. 
 Then if you turn your oyster eye, with ostracizing look, 
 Those his allies, will from the pegs, those very shields 
 
 unhook : 
 Rushing outright, at dark midnight, with insurrection 
 
 sudden, 
 To seize perforce the public stores, with all your meal and 
 
 pudden. 
 DEM. Well I declare ! the straps are there ! O what a 
 
 deep, surprising, 
 Uncommon rascal ! What a plot the wretch has been 
 
 devising. 
 CLEON. Hear and attend, my worthy friend, and don't 
 
 directly credit 
 A tale for truth, because forsooth "The man that told me, 
 
 said it." 
 You'll never see a friend like me, that well or ill 
 
 rewarded, 
 
 Has uniformly done his best, to keep you safely guarded ; 
 Watching and working night and day, with infinite detec- 
 tions 
 
 Of treasons and conspiracies, and plots in all directions. 
 S. S. Yes, that's your course, your sole resource, the same 
 
 device for ever. 
 
 As country fellows fishing eels, that in the quiet river, 
 Or the clear lake, have failed to take, begin to poke and 
 
 muddle,
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 147 
 
 And rouse and rout it all about and work it to a puddle 
 
 To catch their game you do the same in the hubbub and 
 confusion, 
 
 Which you create to blind the State, with unobserved collu- 
 sion, 
 
 Grasping at ease your bribes and fees. But answer ! Tell 
 me whether 
 
 You, that pretend yourself his friend, with all your wealth 
 in leather, 
 
 Ever supplied a single hide, to mend his reverend battered 
 
 Old buskins ? 
 
 DEM. No ; not he, by Jove ! Look at them, burst 
 
 and tattered ! 
 
 S. S. That shows the man ! now spick and span, behold, 
 my noble largess ! 
 
 A lovely pair, bought for your wear, at my own cost and 
 
 charges. 
 
 DEM. I see your mind is well inclined, with views and 
 temper suiting, 
 
 To place the state of things and toes, upon a proper 
 
 footing. 
 
 CLEON. What an abuse ! a pair of shoes to purchase 
 your affection ! 
 
 Whilst all my worth is blott ed forth, raised from your recol- 
 lection ; 
 
 That was your guide, so proved and tried, that showed 
 myself so zealous, 
 
 And so severe this very year, and of your honour jealous, 
 
 Noting betimes all filthy crimes, without respect or pity. 
 S. S. He that's inclined to filth, may find enough 
 throughout the city : 
 
 A .different view determined you; those infamous 
 offenders 
 
 Seemed in your eyes, likely to rise, aspirants and pre- 
 tenders ;
 
 148 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 In bold debate, and ready prate, undaunted rhetoricians; 
 In impudence and influence, your rival politicians. 
 But there now, see ! this winter he might pass without his 
 
 clothing ; 
 The season's cold, he's chilly and eld ; but still you think 
 
 of nothing ! 
 Whilst I, to show my love, bestow this waistcoat, as a 
 
 present 
 Comely and new, with sleeves thereto, of flannel warm and 
 
 pleasant. 
 DEM. How strange it is ! Themistocles was reckoned 
 
 mighty clever ! 
 
 With all his wit, he could not hit on such a project ever, 
 Such a device, so warm, so nice; in short, it equals 
 
 fairly 
 His famous wall, the port and all, that he contrived so 
 
 rarely. 
 CLEON. To what a pass you drive me, alas ! to what a 
 
 vulgar level ! 
 S. S. 'Tis your own plan ; 'twas you began. As topers 
 
 at a revel, 
 Pressed On a sudden, rise at once, and seize without 
 
 regarding, 
 Their neighbours' slippers for the nonce, to turn into the 
 
 garden. 
 I stand, in short, upon your shoes I copy your 
 
 behaviour, 
 And take and use, for my own views, your flattery and 
 
 palaver. 
 CLEON. I shall outvie your flatteries, I ! see here this 
 
 costly favour 1 
 This mantle ! take it for my sake 
 
 DEM. Faugh ! what a filthy flavour 1 
 
 Off with it quick 1 it makes me sick, it stinks of hides and 
 
 leather.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 149 
 
 S. S. 'Twas by design : if you'll combine and put the 
 
 facts together, 
 
 Like his device of Silphium spice pretending to bedizen 
 You with a dress ! 'Twas nothing less, than an attempt to 
 
 poison. 
 He sunk the price of that same spice, and with the same 
 
 intention 
 You recollect ? 
 
 DEM. I recollect the circumstance you mention. 
 
 S. S. Then recollect the sad effect ! that instance of the 
 
 jury 
 All flushed and hot, fixed to the spot, exploding in a 
 
 fury. 
 To see them was a scene of woe, in that infectious 
 
 smother, 
 Winking and blinking in a row, and poisoning one 
 
 another. 
 CLEON. Varlet and knave ! thou dirty slave ! what trash* 
 
 have you collected ? 
 S. S. 'Tis your own cue I copy you. So the Oracle 
 
 directed. 
 CLEON. I'll match you still, for I can fill his pint-pot of 
 
 appointment, 
 For holidays and working-days, t 
 
 S. S. But here's a box of ointment 
 
 A salve prescribed for heels when kibed, given with my 
 
 humble duty. 
 CLEON. I'll pick your white hairs out of sight, and make 
 
 you quite a beauty. 
 
 S. S. But here's a prize, for your dear eyes ! a rabbit- 
 scut ! See there now ! 
 
 * A reprimand which in this, and one or two other instances, the translator 
 is tempted to transfer to himself! 
 
 t Donatives on festival days, when the courts were closed and the jury- 
 men's pay suspended.
 
 150 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 CLEON. Wipe 'em, and then, wipe it again, dear Demus, 
 
 on my hair now. 
 S. S. On mine, I say ! On mine, do, pray ! 
 
 [DEMUS bestows, in a careless manner, his dirty 
 preference upon the S. S. He pays no attention 
 to the altercation which folloivs, but remains in 
 the attitude of a solid old juryman, sitting upon 
 a difficult cause concocting the decision which he at 
 last pronounces^ 
 
 CLEON. I shall fit you with a ship, 
 To provide for and equip, 
 One that has been long forgotten, 
 Leaky, worm-eaten, and rotten, 
 On it you shall waste and spend 
 Time and money without end. 
 Furthermore, if I prevail, 
 It shall have a rotten sail. 
 CHOR. There he's foaming, boiling over : 
 
 See the froth above the cover. 
 
 This combustion to allay, 
 
 We must take some sticks away. 
 
 CLEON. I shall bring you down to ruin, 
 
 With my summoning and suing 
 
 For arrear of taxes due, 
 
 And charges and assessments new, 
 
 In the census you shall pass 
 
 Rated in the richest class. 
 S. S. I reply with nothing worse 
 
 Than this just and righteous curse. 
 
 May you stand beside the stove,* 
 
 With the fishes that you love, 
 
 Fizzling in the tempting pan, 
 
 A distracted anxious man ; 
 
 * It is to be presumed that Cleon is indulging himself in the Prytaneum.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. ! SI 
 
 The Milesian question * pending, 
 Which you then should be defending, 
 With a talent for your hire 
 If you gain what they desire. 
 Then their agent, in a sweat, 
 Comes to say the Assembly 's met ; 
 All in haste you snatch and follow, 
 And in vain attempt to swallow; 
 Running with your gullet filled, 
 Till we see you choked and killed. 
 
 CHORUS. So be it, mighty Jove ! so be it ! 
 And holy Ceres, may I live to see it ! 
 DEM. \rousing himself gradually from his meditatioii\, 
 ... In truth and he seems to me, by far the best 
 The worthiest that has been long since the kindest, 
 And best disposed, to the honest sober class 
 Of simple humble three-penny citizens. 
 You, Paphlagonian, on the contrary 
 Have offended and incensed me. Therefore now 
 Give back your seal of office ! You must be 
 No more my steward ! 
 
 CLEON. Take it ! and withal 
 
 Bear this in mind ! That he, my successor, 
 Whoever he may be, will prove a rascal 
 More artful and nefarious than myself 
 A bigger rogue be sure, and baser far ! 
 
 DEM. This seal is none of mine, or my eyes deceive me 
 The figure's not the same ! I'm sure ! 
 
 S. S. Let's see 
 
 What was the proper emblem upon your seal ? 
 DEM. A sirloin of roast beef 
 S. S. It is not that 
 
 * The Scholiast affords us no light as to the allusion to the Milesian 
 question.
 
 j S 2 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 DEM. Not the roast beef! What is it ? 
 
 S. S- A cormorant 
 
 Haranguing open-mouthed upon a rock * 
 
 DEM. Oh mercy ! 
 
 S. S. What's the matter ? 
 
 DEM. Away with it ! 
 
 That was Cleonymus's seal, not mine t 
 But here take this, act with it as my steward. 
 
 CLEON. Not yet, Sir ! I beseech you. First permit me 
 To communicate some oracles I possess. 
 
 S. S. And me too, some of mine. 
 
 \ 
 
 ' CLEON. Beware of them ! 
 
 His oracles are most dangerous and infectious ! 
 They strike ye with the leprosy and the jaundice. 
 
 S. S. And his will give you the itch, and a scald head ; 
 And the glanders and mad-staggers ! take my word for it ! 
 
 CLEON. My oracles foretell, that you shall rule 
 Over all Greece, and wear a crown of roses. 
 
 S. S. And mine foretell, that you shall wear a robe 
 With golden spangles, and a crown of gold, 
 And ride in a golden chariot over Thrace; 
 In triumph with king Smicythes and his queen. 
 
 CLEON [to the S. S.].} 
 Well, go for 'em ! and bring "em ! and let him hear 'em ! 
 
 S. S. Yes, sure and you too go fetch yours ! 
 
 CLEON. Heigh-day ! 
 
 S. S. Heigh-day ! Why should not ye ? What should 
 hinder ye ? [Exeunt CLEON and S. S. 
 
 The following Chorus has no merit whatever in the translation ; and not 
 much in the original. The first six lines are composed on the prin- 
 ciple of contrast pointed out in p. 106. 
 
 The Pnyx, the place of assembly, was called the Rock, 
 t Cleonymus's emblem is a bird, to mark his cowardice. See " Achftr- 
 nians," p. 18. The bird is also one of voracious habits. 
 I Cleon affects to give orders which the S. S. retorts.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 153 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Joyful will it be and pleasant 
 To the future times and present, 
 The benignant happy day, 
 
 Which will shine on us at last, 
 Announcing with his genial ray, 
 
 That Cleon is condemned and cast ! 
 Notwithstanding we have heard 
 
 From the seniors of the city,* 
 Jurymen revered and feared, 
 
 An opinion deep and pithy : 
 That the State for household use 
 
 Wants a pestle and a mortar ; 
 That Cleon serves to pound and bruise, 
 
 Or else our income would run shorter. 
 But I was told, the boys at school 
 Observed it as a kind of rule, 
 
 That he never could be made 
 By any means to play the lyre, 
 
 Till he was well and truly paid 
 I mean with lashes for his hire. 
 
 At length his master all at once 
 
 Expelled him as an utter dunce ; 
 
 As by nature ill inclined, 
 
 And wanting gifts of every kind. 
 
 \Re-enter CLEON and //^SAUSAGE-SELLER CLEON 
 with a large packet and the SAUSAGE-SELLER 
 staggering under a porter's load^\ 
 CLEON \to DEMUS]. 
 
 Well, there's a bundle you see, I've brought of 'em ; 
 But that's not all ; there's more of them to come 
 
 * There was a portion of the lower class of citizens who conceived that 
 the State had an interest in supporting the tyrannical exactions of Cleon.
 
 I S 4 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 S. S. I grunt and sweat, you see, with the load of 'era ; 
 But that's not all ; there's more of 'em to come. 
 
 DEM. But what are these ? all ? 
 
 CLEON. Oracles. 
 
 DEM. What, all ? 
 
 CLEON. Ah, you're surprised, it seems, at the quantity ! 
 That's nothing ; I've a trunk full of 'em at home. 
 
 S. S. And I've a garret and out-house both brimful. 
 
 DEM. Let's give 'em a look. Whose oracles are these ? 
 
 CLEON. Bakis's mine are. 
 
 DEM. [to the S. S.]. Well, and whose are yours ? 
 
 S. S. Mine are from Glanis, Bakis's elder brother. 
 
 DEM. And what are they all about ? 
 
 CLEON. About the Athenians, 
 
 About the Island of Pylos, about myself, 
 About yourself, about all kinds of things. 
 
 DEM. And what are yours about ? 
 
 S. S. About the Athenians, 
 
 About pease-pudding and porridge, about the Spartans, 
 About the war, about the pilchard fishery, 
 About the state of things in general, 
 About short weights and measures in the market, 
 About all things and persons whatsoever, 
 About yourself and me. Bid him go whistle. 
 
 DEM. Come, read them out then ! that one in particular, 
 My favourite one of all, about the eagle ; 
 About my being an eagle in the clouds. 
 
 CLEON. Listen then ! Give your attention to the Oracle ! 
 " Son of Erechtheus, mark and ponder well, 
 This holy warning from Apollo's cell. 
 It bids thee cherish, him the sacred whelp ; 
 Who for thy sake doth bite and- bark and yelp. 
 Guard and protect him from the chattering jay ; 
 So shall thy juries all be kept in pay." 
 
 DEM. That's quite above me 1 Erechtheus and a whelp I
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 155 
 
 What should Erechtheus do with a whelp or a jay ? 
 What does it mean ? * 
 
 CLEON. The meaning of it is this : 
 
 I am presignified as a dog, who barks 
 And watches for you. Apollo therefore bids you 
 Cherish the sacred whelp meaning myself. 
 
 S. S. I tell ye, the Oracle means no such thing : 
 This whelp has gnawed the corner off; but here, 
 I've a true perfect copy. 
 
 DEM. Read it out then ! 
 
 Meanwhile I'll pick a stone up for the nonce, 
 For fear the dog in the Oracle should bite me. 
 
 S. S. " Son of Erechtheus, 'ware the gap-toothed dog, 
 The crafty mongrel that purloins thy prog ; 
 Fawning at meals, and filching scraps away, 
 The whilst you gape and stare another way ; 
 He prowls by night, and pilfers many a prize, 
 Amidst the sculleries and the colonies." 
 
 DEM. Well, Glanis has the best of it, I declare. 
 
 CLEON. First listen, my good friend, and then decide : 
 " In sacred Athens shall a woman dwell, 
 Who shall bring forth a lion fierce and fell ; 
 This lion shall defeat the gnats and flies, 
 Which are that noble nation's enemies. 
 Him you must guard and keep for public good, 
 With iron bulwarks and a wall of wood." 
 
 DEM. [to the S. S.] 
 D'ye understand it ? 
 
 S. S. No, not I, by Jove ! 
 
 CLEON. Apollo admonishes you, to guard and keep me ; 
 I am the lion here alluded to. 
 
 * Discussions on the genuine and corrupt copies of oracles were not 
 unfrequent ; we find an instance in Thucydides. See also the scene of the 
 Soothsayer in " The Birds."
 
 156 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 DEM. A lion ! Why just now you were a dog ! 
 
 S. S. Aye, but he stifles the true sense of it, 
 Designedly that " wooden and iron wall," 
 In which Apollo tells ye he should be kept. 
 
 DEM. What did the deity mean by it ? What d'ye think ? 
 
 S. S. To have him kept in the pillory and the stocks. 
 
 DEM. That prophecy seems likely to be verified. 
 
 CLEON. " Heed not their strain ; for crows and daws 
 
 abound, 
 
 But love your faithful hawk, victorious found, 
 Who brought the Spartan magpies tied and bound." 
 
 S. S. " The Paphlagonian, impudent and rash, 
 Risked that adventure in a drunken dash. 
 
 simple son of Cecrops, ill advised ! 
 
 1 see desert in arms unfairly prized : 
 Men only can secure and kill the game ; 
 A woman's deed it is to cook the same." 
 
 CLEON. Do listen at least to the Oracle about Pylos : 
 " Pylos there is behind, and eke before,* 
 The bloody Pylos." 
 
 DEM. Let me hear no more ! 
 
 Those Pylos's are my torment evermore. 
 
 S. S. But here's an Oracle which you must attend to ; 
 About the navy a very particular one. 
 
 DEM. Yes, I'll attend I wish it would tell me how 
 To pay my seamen their arrears of wages. 
 
 S. S. " O son of Egeus, ponder and beware 
 Of the dog-fox, so crafty, lean, and spare, 
 Subtle and swift." Do ye understand it ? 
 
 DEM. Yes ! 
 
 Of course the dog-fox f means Philostratus. 
 
 There were three places of this name, not very distant from each other. 
 
 t The dog was (in a bad sense) the type of impudence the fox of 
 cunning ; Philostratus, the compound of the two, gained his subsistence by a 
 very infamous trade.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 157 
 
 S. S. That's not the meaning but the Paphlagonian 
 Is always urging you to send out ships ; 
 Cruizing about sxacting contributions ; 
 A thing that Apollo positively forbids. 
 
 DEM. But why are the ships here called dog-foxes ? 
 
 S. S. Why? 
 
 Because the ships are swift, and dogs are swift. 
 
 DEM. But what has a fox to do with it ? Why dog- 
 foxes ? 
 
 S. S. The fox is a type of the ship's crew ; marauding 
 And eating up the vineyards. 
 
 DEM. Well, so be it ! 
 
 But how are my foxes to get paid their wages ? 
 
 S. S. I'll settle it all, and make provision for them, 
 Three days' provision, presently. Only now, 
 This instant, let me remind you of an Oracle : 
 " Beware Cullene." 
 
 DEM. What's the meaning of it ? 
 
 S. S. Cullene, in the sense I understand, 
 Implies a kind of a culling, asking hand 
 The coiled hand of an informing bully, 
 Culling a bribe from his affrighted cully,\ 
 A hand like his. 
 
 CLEON. No, no ! you're quite mistaken, 
 
 It alludes to Diopithes's lame hand.f 
 " But here's a glorious prophecy which sings, 
 How you shall rule on earth, and rank with kings, 
 And soar aloft in air on eagle's wings." 
 
 S. S. " And some of mine foretell that you shall be, 
 Sovereign of all the world and the Red Sea ; 
 
 * The Scholiast tells us that the common informer at Athens, when 
 accosting and threatening persons for the purpose of extortion, had an 
 established token (the hand hollowed and slipped out beneath the cloak) 
 indicating that they were willing to desist for a piece of money. 
 
 t As a soothsayer he ought to have been free from any bodily defect.
 
 158 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 And sit on juries in Ecbatana, 
 
 Munching sweet buns and biscuit all the day." 
 
 CLEON. " But me Minerva loves, and I can tell 
 Of a portentous vision that befell 
 The goddess in my sleep appeared to me, 
 Holding a flagon, as it seemed to be, 
 From which she poured upon the old man's crown 
 Wealth, health, and peace, like ointment running down." 
 
 S. S. " And I too dreamt a dream, and it was this : 
 Minerva came from the Acropolis, 
 There came likewise, her serpent and her owl ; 
 And in her hand she held a certain bowl ; 
 And poured ambrosia on the old man's head, 
 And salt-fish pickle upon yours instead." 
 
 DEM. Well, Glanis is the cleverest after all. 
 And therefore I'm resolved, from this time forth, 
 To put myself into your charge and keeping ; 
 To be tended in my old age and taken care of. 
 
 CLEON. No, do pray wait a little ; and see how regularly 
 I'll furnish you with a daily dole of barley. 
 
 DEM. Don't tell me of barley ! I can't bear to hear of it ! 
 I've been cajoled and choused more than enough, 
 By Thouphanes* and yourself this long time past. 
 
 CLEON. Then I'll provide you delicate wheaten flour. 
 
 S. S. And I'll provide you manchets, and roast meat, 
 And messes piping hot that cry " Come eat me." 
 
 DEM. Make haste then, both of ye. Whatever you do 
 And whichever of the two befriends me most, 
 I'll give him up the management of the State. 
 
 CLEON. Well, I'll be first then. 
 
 S. S. No, you sha'n't, 'tis I. 
 
 \Both run off ; but the SAUSAGE-SELLER contrives to get the 
 start.} 
 
 * An adherent of Cleon.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 159 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Worthy Demus ! your estate 
 
 Is a glorious thing we own 
 The haughtiest of the proud and great 
 
 Watch and tremble at your frown ; 
 Like a sovereign or a chief, 
 
 But so easy of belief. 
 Every fawning rogue and thief 
 Finds you ready to his hand, 
 Flatterers you cannot withstand. 
 To them your confidence is lent, 
 With opinions always bent 
 To what your last advisers say, 
 Your noble mind is gone astray. 
 
 DEMUS. 
 
 Those brains of yours are weak and green ; 
 
 My wits are sound whate'er ye say : 
 'Tis nothing but my froward spleen 
 
 That affects this false decay : 
 
 'Tis my fancy, 'tis my way, 
 
 To drawl and drivel through the day. 
 
 But though you see me dote and dream, 
 
 Never think me what I seem ! 
 
 For my confidential slave 
 
 I prefer a pilfering knave ; 
 
 And when he's pampered and full-blown ; 
 
 I snatch him up and dash him down ! 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 We approve of your intent, 
 If you spoke it as you meant ; 
 If you keep them like the beasts, 
 Fattened for your future feasts,
 
 160 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Pampered in the public stall r 
 
 Till the next occasion call ; 
 
 Then a little easy vote 
 
 Knocks them down, and cuts their throat ; 
 
 And you dish and serve them up, 
 
 .As you want to dine or sup. 
 
 DEMITS. 
 
 Mark me ! When I seem to doze, 
 When my wearied eyelids close ; 
 Then they think their tricks are hid : 
 But beneath the drooping lid, 
 Still I keep a corner left, 
 Tracing every secret theft 
 
 I shall match them by-and-by ! 
 All the rogues, you think so sly, 
 All the deep intriguing set, 
 Are but dancing in a net,* 
 Till I purge their stomachs clean 
 With the hemlock and the bean. 
 
 The SAUSAGE-SELLER and CLEON re-enter separately. 
 
 CLEON. Get out there ! 
 
 S. S. You, get out yourself ! you rascal ! 
 
 CLEON. O Demus 1 here have I been waiting, ready 
 To attend upon ye and serve ye, a long, long time. 
 
 S. S. And I've been waiting a longer, longer time 
 Ever so long a great long while ago. 
 
 * Persons subject to an effectual restraint, of which they were themselves 
 unaware, were said to be dancing in a net. The Royalists, in Cromwell's 
 time, found themselves baffled in all their attempts, without at all suspecting 
 the system of secret information by which they were circumvented and 
 restrained. When this came to be known afterwards, it was said that 
 Cromwell had kept them dancing in a net i.e., joyous and alert, conspiring 
 and corresponding in imaginary security, wholly unconscious of the restraint 
 ir. which they had been held.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 161 
 
 DEM. And I've been waiting here cursing ye both, 
 A thousand times, a long, long time ago. 
 
 S. S. You know what you're to do ? 
 
 DEM. Yes, yes, I know; 
 
 But you may tell me, however, notwithstanding. 
 
 S. S. Make it a race, and let us start to serve you, 
 And win your favour without loss of time. 
 
 DEM. So be it. Start now one ! two ! three ! 
 
 CLEON. Heigh-day ! 
 
 DEM. Why don't you start ? 
 
 CLEON. He's cheated and got before me. 
 
 [Exit. 
 
 DEM. Well truly indeed I shall be feasted rarely ; 
 My courtiers and admirers will quite spoil me. 
 
 CLEON. There, I'm the first you see to bring ye a chair. 
 
 S. S. But a table. Here I've brought it, first and fore- 
 most. 
 
 CLEON. See here this little half-meal cake from Pylos, 
 Made from the flour of victory and success. 
 
 S. S. But here's a cake ! see here ! which the heavenly 
 
 goddess 
 
 Patted and flatted herself, with her ivory hand, 
 For your own eating. 
 
 DEM. Wonderful, mighty goddess ! 
 
 What an awfully large hand she must have had ! 
 
 CLEON. See this pease-pudding, which the warlike virgin 
 Achieved at Pylos, and bestows upon you. 
 
 S. S. The goddess upholds your whole establishment, 
 And holds this mess of porridge over your head. 
 
 DEM. I say the establishment could not subsist 
 For a single hour, unless the goddess upheld 
 The porridge of our affairs, most manifestly.* 
 
 * This refers to a notion very prevalent among the Athenians, and which 
 is alluded to elsewhere :
 
 1 62 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 CLEON. She, the dread virgin who delights in battle, 
 And storm and battery, sends this batter-pudding. 
 
 S. S. This savoury stew, with comely sippets decked, 
 Is sent you by the Gorgon-bearing goddess, 
 Who bids you gorge and gormandize thereon. 
 
 CLEON. The daughter of Jove arrayed in panoply 
 Presents you a pancake to create a panic 
 Amongst your enemies. 
 
 S. S. And by me she sends 
 
 For your behoof this dainty dish of fritters, 
 Well fried, to strike your foemen with affright; 
 And here's a cup of wine taste it and try. 
 
 DEM. It's capital, faith ! 
 
 S. S. And it ought to be ; for Pallas 
 
 Mixed it herself expressly for your palate. 
 
 CLEON. This slice of rich sweet- cake, take it from me. 
 
 S. S. This whole great rich sweet-cake, take it from me. 
 
 CLEON [to the S. S.] Ah, but hare-pie where will you 
 get hare-pie ? 
 
 S. S. {aside}. Hare-pie ! What shall I do ! Come, now's 
 
 the time, 
 Now for a nimble, knowing, dashing trick. 
 
 CLEON. [to the S. S., showing the dish which he is going to 
 present]. 
 
 Look there, you poor rapscallion. 
 
 S. S. Pshaw ! no matter. 
 
 " Rash and ever in the wrong, a providence protects us ever, 
 Guiding all your empty plans, assisting every wild endeavour." 
 
 "Clouds," v. 586. 
 
 It was founded on an anecdote, dating as far back as the time of the 
 contest between Neptune and Minerva. Neptune, is his chagrin, impre- 
 cated upon the territory of which he was dispossessed, the curse of being 
 always governed by "bad councils." This Minerva could not cancel ; but 
 she subjoined that these bad councils, bad as they might be, should be 
 successful.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 163 
 
 I've people of my own there in attendance. 
 They're coming here I see them. 
 
 CLEON. Who ? What are they ? 
 
 S. S. Envoys with bags of money. 
 
 [CLEON sets down his hare-pie, and runs off the stage to 
 intercept the supposed envoys.] 
 
 CLEON. Where ? Where are they ? 
 
 Where ? Where ? 
 
 S. S. What's that to you ? Can't ye be civil? 
 
 Why don't you let the foreigners alone ? 
 There's a hare-pie, my dear own little Demus, 
 A nice hare-pie, I've brought ye ! See, look there 1 
 
 CLEON \i-eturning\. By Jove, he's stolen it, and served 
 it up, 
 
 S. S. Just as you did the prisoners at Pylos. 
 
 DEMUS. Where did ye get it ? How did ye steal it ? Tell 
 me. 
 
 S. S. The scheme and the suggestion were divine, 
 The theft and the execution simply mine. 
 
 CLEON. I took the trouble. 
 
 S. S. But I served it up. 
 
 DEMUS. Well, he that brings the thing must get the 
 thanks. 
 
 CLEON \_aside\. Alas, I'm circumvented and undone 
 Out-faced and over-impudentified. 
 
 S. S. Come, Demus, had not you best decide at once, 
 Which is your truest friend, and best disposed 
 To the interest of the State, to your belly and you. 
 
 DEMUS. But how can I decide it cleverly ? 
 Which would the audience think is the cleverest way ? 
 
 S. S. I'll tell ye ; take my chest and search it fairly, 
 Then search the Paphlagonian's and determine. 
 
 DEMUS. Let's look; what's here? 
 
 S. S. It's empty, don't you see ? 
 
 My dear old man, I've given you everything. 
 
 F 2
 
 164 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 DEMUS. Well, here's a chest indeed, in strict accordance 
 With the judgment of the public; perfectly empty ! 
 
 S. S. Come now, let's rummage out the Paphlagonian's. 
 See there ! 
 
 DEMUS. Oh bless me, what a hoard of dainties 1 
 And what a lump of cake the fellow has kept, 
 Compared with the little tiny slice he gave me. 
 
 S. S. That was his common practice ; to pretend 
 To make you presents, giving up a trifle, 
 To keep the biggest portion for himself. 
 
 DEMUS. O villain, how you've wronged and cheated 
 
 me; 
 Me that have honoured ye, and have made ye presents. 
 
 CLEON. I stole on principle for the public service. 
 
 DEMUS. Pull off your garland give it back to me, 
 For him to wear ! 
 
 S. S. Come, sirrah, give it back I 
 
 CLEON. Not so. There still remains an Oracle, 
 Which marks the fatal sole antagonist, 
 Predestined for my final overthrow. 
 
 S. S. Yes ! And it points to me, my name and person ! 
 
 CLEON. Yet would I fain inquire and question you ; 
 How far the signs and tokens of the prophecy 
 Combine in your behalf. Answer me truly ! 
 What was your early school ? Where did you learn 
 The rudiments of letters and of music? 
 
 S. S. Where hogs are singed and scalded in the shambles, 
 There was I pummelled to a proper tune. 
 
 CLEON. Ha, sayst thou so ? this prophecy begins 
 To bite me to the soul with deep forebodings. 
 Yet tell me again What was your course of practice 
 In feats of strength and skill at the Palaestra ? 
 
 S. S. Stealing and staring, perjuring and swearing. 
 
 CLEON. O mighty Apollo, your decree condemns me ! 
 Say, what was your employment afterwards ?
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 165 
 
 S. S. I practised as a Sausage-seller chiefly, 
 Occasionally as pimp and errand-boy. 
 
 CLEON. Oh misery ! lost and gone ! totally lost ! 
 
 \after a pause\ 
 
 One single hope remains, a feeble thread, 
 I grasp it to the last. Yet answer me : 
 What was your place of sale for sausages ? 
 Was it the market or the city gate ? 
 
 S. S. The city gate 1 Where salted fish are sold ! 
 
 CLEON. Out ! out alas ! my destiny is fulfilled : 
 Hurry me hence within with quick conveyance, 
 The wreck and ruin of my former self. 
 Farewell my name and honours ! Thou, my garland, 
 Farewell 1 my successor must wear you now, 
 To shine in new pre-eminence a rogue, 
 Perhaps less perfect, but more prosperous ! 
 
 S. S. O Jove ! Patron of Greece ! the praise be 
 thine ! 
 
 DEMOSTHENES.* I wish you joy most heartily; and I 
 
 hope, 
 
 Now you're promoted, you'll remember me, 
 For helping you to advancement. All I ask 
 Is Phanus's place to be under-scrivener to you. 
 
 DEM. [to the S. S.] You tell me what's your name ? 
 
 S. S. Agoracritus ; 
 
 So called from the Agora where I got my living. 
 
 DEM. With you then, Agoracritus, in your hands 
 I place myself; and furthermore consign 
 This Paphlagonian here to your disposal. 
 
 S. S. Then you shall find me, a most affectionate 
 And faithful guardian ; the best minister 
 That ever served the sovereign of the Cockneys. 
 
 \Exeitnt Omnes. 
 
 * In a very civil, submissive tone.
 
 166 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 The actors being withdrawn, the Chorus remain ngain in possession of 
 the theatre. Their first song is a parody from Pindar, which is 
 converted into a lampoon upon Lysistratus, who having reduced 
 himself to poverty had procured (by the assistance of his friends) a 
 lucrative appointment at Delphi. He is mentioned in " The Achar- 
 nian?, 1 see the song, p. 60. 
 
 To record to future years 
 The lordly wealthy charioteers, 
 Steeds, and cars, and crowns victorious, 
 These are worthy themes and glorious. 
 
 Let the Muse refrain from malice, 
 Nor molest with idle sallies 
 Him the poor Lysistratus ; 
 Taunted for his empty purse, 
 Every penny gone and spent, 
 Lately with Thaumantis sent 
 On a Delphic embassy, 
 With a tear in either eye, 
 Clinging to the deity 
 To bemoan his misery. 
 
 EPIRREMA. 
 
 An attempt is here made to express what the Scholiast points out ; 
 namely, that the contrast between the two brothers is a piece of dry 
 irony. In other respects the original is hardly capable of translation. 
 
 To revile the vile, has ever been accounted just and right, 
 The business of the comic bard, his proper office, his 
 
 delight. 
 
 On the villanous and base, the lashes of invective fall ; 
 While the virtuous and the good are never touched or 
 
 harmed at all. 
 Thus, without offence, to mark a profligate and wicked 
 
 brother, 
 For the sake of explanation, I proceed to name another :
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 167 
 
 One is wicked and obscure, the brother unimpeached and 
 
 glorious, 
 
 Eminent for taste and art, a person famous and notorious. 
 Arignotus when I name him, you discern at once, with 
 
 ease, 
 The viler and obscurer name, the person meant 
 
 Ariphrades, 
 
 If he were a rascal only we should let the wretch alone, 
 He's a rascal, and he knows it, and desires it to be known. 
 Still we should not have consented to lampoon him into 
 
 vogue, 
 
 As an ordinary rascal, or a villain, or a rogue ; 
 But the wretch is grown inventive, eager to descend and 
 
 try 
 
 Undiscovered, unattempted depths of filth and infamy ; 
 Witn his nastiness and lewdness, going on from bad to 
 
 worse, 
 
 With his verses and his music, and his friend Oionychus. 
 Jolly friends and mates of mine, when with me you quench 
 
 your thirst, 
 Spit before you taste the wine spit upon the fellow first. 
 
 Meditating on my bed, 
 
 Strange perplexities are bred 
 
 In my weary, restless head. 
 
 I contemplate and discuss 
 
 The nature of Cleonymus, 
 
 All the modes of his existence, 
 
 His provision and subsistence, 
 
 His necessities and wants, 
 
 And the houses that he haunts, 
 
 Till the master of the table, 
 
 Accosts him like the gods in fable, 
 
 Manifested and adored 
 
 At Baucis' and Philemon's board
 
 1 68 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 " Mighty sovereign ! Mighty lord ! 
 Leave us in mercy and grace. Forbear ! 
 Our frugal insufficient fare, 
 Pardon it ! and in mercy spare ! 
 
 ANTEPIRREMA. 
 
 Our Triremes, I was told, held a conference of late, 
 One, a bulky dame and old, spoke the first in the debate: 
 " Ladies, have you heard the news ? In the town it passed 
 
 for truth, 
 
 That a certain low bred upstart, one Hyperbolus forsooth, 
 Asks a hundred of our number, with a further proposition, 
 That we should sail with him to Carthage* on a secret 
 
 expedition." 
 They all were scandalized and shocked to hear so wild a 
 
 project planned, 
 A virgin vessel newly docked, but which never had been 
 
 manned, 
 Answered instantly with anger, " If the Fates will not afford 
 
 me 
 Some more suitable proposal, than that wretch to come 
 
 aboard me, 
 I would rather rot and perish, and remain from year to 
 
 year, 
 Till the worms have eat my bottom, lingering in the harbour 
 
 here. 
 No, thank heaven, for such a master Nauson's daughter 
 
 is too good ; 
 And if my name were not Nauphantis, I am made of nails 
 
 and wood. 
 
 I propose then to retire in sanctuary to remain 
 Near the temple of the Furies, or to Theseus and his fane. 
 
 Carthage, in this instance, may admit of a doubt. See note to p. 97 ; 
 but it was by no means beyond the speculations of Athenian ambition at 
 that time.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 169 
 
 Still the project may proceed ; Hyperbolus can never fail. 
 He may launch the trays of wood, in which his lamps were 
 set to sale" 
 
 AGORACRITUS (the SAUSAGE-SELLER). 
 
 Peace be amongst you ! Silence ! Peace ! 
 
 Close the courts ; let pleadings cease ! 
 
 All your customary joys, 
 
 Juries, accusers, strife and noise ! 
 
 Be merry, I say ! Let the theatre ring 
 
 With a shout of applause for the news that I bring. 
 
 CHOR. O thou the protector and hope of the State, 
 Of the isles and allies of the city, relate 
 What happy event, do you call us to greet, 
 With bonfire and sacrifice filling the street. 
 
 Ac. Old Demus within has moulted his skin ; 
 I've cooked him, and stewed him, to render him stronger, 
 Many years younger, and shabby no longer. 
 
 CHOR. Oh, what a change ! How sudden and strange ! 
 But where is he now? 
 
 Ac. On the citadel's brow, 
 
 In the lofty old town of immortal renown, 
 With the noble Ionian violet crown. 
 
 CHOR. What was his vesture, his figure and gesture ? 
 How did you leave him, and how does he look ? 
 
 Ac. Joyous and bold, as when feasting of old, 
 When his battles were ended, triumphant and splendid, 
 With Miltiades sitting carousing at rest, 
 Or good Aristides his favourite guest. 
 You shall see him here strait ; for the citadel gate 
 Is unbarred ; and the hinges you hear how they grate ! 
 
 \The Scene changes to a view of the Propyl(zuml\ 
 
 Give a shout for the sight of the rocky old height ! 
 And the worthy old wight, that inhabits within !
 
 i;o THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 CHOR. Thou glorious hill ! pre-eminent still 
 For splendour of empire and honour and worth ! 
 Exhibit him here, for the Greeks to revere ; 
 Their patron and master the monarch of earth ! 
 
 Ac. There, see him, behold! with the jewels of gold 
 Entwined in his hair, in the fashion of old ; 
 Not dreaming of verdicts or dirty decrees ; 
 But lordly, majestic, attired at his ease, 
 Perfuming all Greece with an odour of peace. 
 
 CHOR. We salute you, and greet you, and bid you 
 
 rejoice ; 
 
 With unanimous heart, with unanimous voice, 
 Our sovereign lord, in glory restored, 
 Returning amongst us in royal array, 
 Worthy the trophies of Marathon's day ! 
 
 [DEM us comes fonvard in his splendid old-fashioned 
 attire : the features of his mask are changed to 
 those of youth, and his carriage throughout this 
 scene is marked with the characteristics of youtii, 
 warmth, eagerness, and occasional bashfulness 
 and embarrassment^ 
 
 DEM. My dearest Agoracritus, come here 
 I'm so obliged to you for your cookery ! 
 I feel an altered man, you've quite transformed me. 
 
 Ac. What ! I ? That's nothing ; if you did but know 
 The state you were in before, you'd worship me. 
 
 DEM. What was I doing ? How did I behave ? 
 Do tell me inform against me let me know. 
 
 Ac. Why first, then : if an orator in the Assembly 
 Began with saying, Demus, I'm your friend, 
 Your faithful zealous friend, your only friend, 
 You used to chuckle, and smirk, and hold your head up. 
 
 DEM. No sure ! 
 
 Ac. So he gained his end, and bilked and choused ye.
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 171 
 
 DEM. But did not I perceive it ? Was not I told ? 
 
 Ac. By Jove, and you wore those ears of yours 
 
 continually 
 Wide open or close shut, like an umbrella. 
 
 DEM. Is it possible ? Was I indeed so mere a driveller 
 In my old age, so superannuated ? 
 
 AG. Moreover, if a couple of orators 
 Were pleading in your presence ; one proposing 
 To equip a fleet, his rival arguing 
 To get the same supplies distributed 
 To the jurymen, the patron of the juries 
 Carried the day. But why do you hang your head so? 
 What makes you shuffle about ? Can't ye stand still ? 
 
 DEM. I feel ashamed of myself and all my follies. 
 
 AG.* J T\vas not your fault don't think of it. Your 
 
 advisers 
 
 Were most to blame. But for the future tell me, 
 If any rascally villanous orator 
 Should address a jury with such words as these : 
 " Remember, if you acquit the prisoner 
 Your daily food and maintenance are at stake," 
 How would you treat such a pleader ? Answer me. 
 
 DEM. I should toss him headlong into the public pit, 
 With a halter round his gullet, and Hyperbolus 
 Tied fast to the end of it. 
 
 Ac. That's a noble answer ! 
 
 Wise and judicious, just and glorious ! 
 Now tell me, in other respects, how do you mean 
 To manage your affairs ? 
 
 DEM. Why first of all 
 
 I'll have the arrears of seamen's wages paid 
 To a penny, the instant they return to port. 
 
 * The tone of the S. S. is that of a considerate, indulgent preceptor to a 
 young man who has been misbehaving.
 
 1 72 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 Ac. There's many a worn-out rump will bless ye and 
 thank ye. 
 
 DEM. Moreover, no man that has been enrolled 
 Upon the list for military service, 
 Shall have his name erased for fear or favour. 
 
 Ac. That gives a bang to Cleonymus's buckler. 
 
 DEM. I'll not permit those fellows without beards 
 To harangue in our Assembly ; boys or men. 
 
 Ac. Then what's to become of Cleisthenes and Strato? * 
 Where must they speak ? 
 
 DEM. I mean those kind of youths, 
 
 The little puny would-be politicians, 
 Sitting conversing in perfumers' shops, 
 Lisping and prating in this kind of way : 
 " Phseax is sharp he made a good come-off, 
 And saved his life in a famous knowing style. 
 I reckon him a first-rate ; quite capital 
 For energy and compression ; so collected, 
 And such a choice of language ! Then to see him 
 Battling against a mob it's quite delightful ! 
 He's never cowed ! He bothers 'em completely ! " 
 
 Ac. It's your own fault, in part you've helped to spoil 'em ; 
 But what do you mean to do with 'em for the future ? 
 
 DEM. I shall send them into the country, all the pack of 
 
 'em, 
 To learn to hunt, and leave off making laws. 
 
 Ac. Then I present you here with a folding chair, 
 And a stout lad to carry it after you. 
 
 DEM. Ah, that reminds one of the good old times. 
 
 Ac. But what will you say, if I give you a glorious 
 
 peace, 
 
 A lusty strapping truce of thirty years ? 
 Come forward here, my lass, and show yourself. 
 
 * See ' Acharnians," p. i;, where both are n.cntioned,
 
 THE KNIGHTS. 
 
 173 
 
 DEM. By Jove, what a face and figure ! I should like 
 To ratify and conclude incontinently. 
 Where did you find her ? 
 
 Ac. Oh, the Paphlagonian, 
 
 Of course, had huddled her out of sight, within there. 
 But now you've got her, take her back with you 
 Into the country. 
 
 DEM. But the Paphlagonian, 
 
 What shall we do to punish him ? What d'ye think ? 
 
 AG. Oh, no great matter. He shall have my trade ; 
 With an exclusive sausage-selling patent, 
 To traffic openly at the city gates, 
 And garble his wares with dogs' and asses' flesh ; 
 With a privilege, moreover, to get drunk, 
 And bully among the strumpets of the suburbs, 
 And the ragamuffin waiters at the baths. 
 
 DEM. That's well imagined, it precisely suits him ; 
 His natural bent, it seems, his proper element 
 To squabble with poor trulls and low rapscallions. 
 As for yourself, I give you an invitation 
 To dine with me in the hall. You'll fill the seat 
 Which that unhappy villain held before. 
 Take this new robe ! Wear it and follow me ! 
 
 And you, the rest of you, conduct that fellow 
 To his future home and place of occupation, 
 The gate of the city ; where the allies and foreigners, 
 That he maltreated, may be sure to find him. 
 
 [Exeunt.
 
 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Intended to convey some notion of its tffict as an acted play, and to 
 
 illustrate certain points of dramatic humour and character 
 
 discoverable in the original. 
 
 'Terentius Menandrum, Plautus et Csecilius veteres Comicos interpretati 
 sunt, numquid hcerent in verbis, ac non decorem potius et elegantiain 
 in tronslatione conservant ? " HIERON., Epis. de optimo ger.ere 
 interpretandi. 
 
 " Si Graios patrio carmine adire sales 
 Possumus, optatis plus jam processimus ipsis. 
 Hoc satis est." VIRGIL.
 
 THE BIRDS. 
 
 DRAMATIS PERSONS. 
 
 PEISTHETAIRUS. An Athenian citizen, but disgusted with his own 
 country, starts on his travels proposing to seek his fortune in the 
 kingdom of the Birds. He is represented as the essential man of 
 business and ability, the true political adventurer, the man who 
 directs everything and everybody, who is never in the wrong, never 
 at a loss, never at rest, never satisfied %vith what has been done by 
 others, uniformly successful in his operations. lie maintains a 
 constant ascendency, or if he loses it for a moment, recovers it imme- 
 diately. 
 
 EUELPIDES. A simple, ensy-min -led, droll companion, his natural 
 follower and adherent, as the merry-andrew is of the mountebank. 
 It will be seen that, like the merry-andrew, he interposes his 
 buffoonish comments on the grand oration delivered by his master. 
 
 EPOPS. King of the Birds, formerly Tereus king of Thrace, but long 
 ago, according to the records of mythology, transformed into a 
 hoopoe. He appears as the courteous dignified sovereign of a 
 primitive uncivilized race whom he is desirous to improve ; he g've?, 
 a gracious reception to strangers arriving from a country more 
 advanced in civilization, and adopts the projects of aggrandizement 
 suggested to him by Peisthetairus. 
 
 THE CHORUS OF BIRDS, his subjects, retain, on the contrary, their here- 
 ditary hatred and suspicion of the human race ; they are ready to 
 break out into open mutiny against their king, and to massacre hL> 
 foreign (human) advisers upon the spot. It is with the greatest 
 difficulty that they can be prevailed upon to hear reason, and attend 
 to the luminous exposition of Pei-thetairu ; . His harangue has the 
 effect of conciliating and convincing them : his projects are adopted
 
 178 THE BIRDS. 
 
 without a dissentient voice. War is not immediately declared against 
 the gods, but a sort of Mexican blockade is established by procla- 
 mation. 
 
 PROMETHEUS. A malcontent deity, the ancient patron of the human 
 race, still retaining a concealed attachment to the deposed dynasty 
 of Saturn. lie comes over secretly with intelligence which Peisthe- 
 tairus avails himself of, and which proves ultimately decisive of the 
 subjugation of the gods. 
 
 NEPTUNE, HERCULES, TRIBALLUS, or the TRIBALLIAN. Joint ambas- 
 sadors from the gods commissioned to treat with Peisthetairus. 
 Neptune is represented as a formal dignified personage of the old 
 school. Hercules as a passionate, wrong-headed, greedy blockhead ; 
 he is cajoled and gr.ined over by PeUthetairus, and in his turn inti- 
 midates the Triballian, an ignorant barbarian deity who is hardly 
 able to speak intelligibly. They join together, Neptune is out-voted, 
 and Peisthetairus concludes a treaty by which his highest pretensions 
 are realized. 
 
 The characters above mentioned are the only ones who contribute in any 
 way to the progress of the drama ; the remainder, a very nmusing 
 set of persons, are introduced in detached scenes, exemplifying the 
 various interruptions and annoyances incident to the man of business, 
 distracting his attention and embarrassing him in the exercise of his 
 authoritative functions. There are, however, exceptions. 
 
 IRIS, who is brought in, having been captured and detained for an 
 infringement of the blockade. 
 
 A PRIEST, who comes to sacrifice at the inauguration of the new 
 city. 
 
 Two MESSENGERS, arriving from different quarters with very interesting 
 and satisfactory intelligence. 
 
 The rest are a mere series of intruders OP. the time and attention of the 
 great man. 
 
 POET. A ragged vagabond, who comes begging with an inaugural ode 
 on the foundation of the new city. 
 
 A SOOTHSAYER, arriving with Oracles relative to the same important 
 event, and a demand of perquisites due to himself by divine 
 authority. 
 
 METON, the Astronomer, proposes to make a plan and survey of the 
 new city. 
 
 A COMMISSIONER from Athens, a very authoritative personage. 
 
 A VENDOR of copies of decrees, he enters reading them aloud like a 
 hawker to attract purchasers. 
 
 PARRICIDE. A young man, who has beaten his father and proposes to 
 strangle him, offers himself as a desirable acquisition to the new 
 colony.
 
 THE BIRDS. 179 
 
 KINESIAS, the ditliyrambic poet, applies for a pair of \\ings. 
 INFORMER. A young man, whose hereditary trade is that of an informer, 
 
 and whose practice extends to the islands, comes with the same 
 
 application. 
 
 SCENE. 
 
 [A wild desolate country with a bare open prospect 
 on one side, and some upright rocks covered with 
 shrubs and brushwood in the centre of the stage. 
 PEISTHETAIRUS and EUEI.PIDES appear as a 
 couple of worn-out pedestrian travellers, the one 
 with a raven and the other with a jackdaw on 
 his hand. They appear to be seeking for a direc- 
 tion from the motions and signals made to them 
 by the Birds.] 
 
 Eu. [speaking to his jackdaw]. 
 Right on, do ye say ? to the tree there in the distance ? 
 
 PEIS. [speaking first to his raven, and then to his com- 
 panion]. 
 Plague take ye ! Why this creature calls us back ! 
 
 Eu. What use can it answer tramping up and down ? 
 We're lost, I tell ye : our journey's come to nothing. 
 
 PEIS. To think of me travelling a thousand stadia 
 With a raven for my adviser ! 
 
 Eu. Think of me, too, 
 
 Going at the instigation of a jackdaw, 
 To wear my toes and my toe-nails to pieces ! 
 
 PEIS. I don't know even the country where we've got to. 
 
 Eu. And yet you expect to find a country here, 
 A country for yourself ! 
 
 PEIS. Truly not I j 
 
 Not even Execestides * could do it, 
 That finds himself a native everywhere. 
 
 * He is attacked again in this play, as a foreign barbarian arrogating to 
 himself the privileges of a true-born Athenian.
 
 i8o THE BIRDS. 
 
 Eu. Oh dear ! We're come to ruin, utter ruin ! 
 
 PEIS. Then go that way, can't ye : " the Road to Ruin ! " 
 
 Eu. He has brought us to a fine pass, that crazy fellow, 
 Philocrates the poulterer ; he pretended 
 To enable us to find where Tereus lives ; 
 The king that was, the Hoopoe that is now ; 
 Persuading us to buy these creatures of him, 
 That raven there for threepence, and this other, 
 This little Tharrelides * of a jackdaw, 
 He charged a penny for : but neither of 'em 
 Are fit for anything but to bite and scratch. 
 
 [speaking to his jackdaw] 
 
 Well, what are ye after now ? gaping and poking ! 
 You've brought us straight to the rock. Where would you 
 
 take us ? 
 There's no road here ! 
 
 PEIS. No, none, not even a path. 
 
 Eu. Nor don't your raven tell us anything ? 
 
 PEIS. She's altered somehow she croaks differently. 
 
 Eu. But which way does she point? What does she say? 
 
 PEIS. Say ? Why, she says, she'll bite my fingers off. 
 
 Eu. Well, truly it's hard upon us, hard indeed, 
 To go with our own carcases to the crows, 
 And not be able to find 'em after all. 
 
 [turning to the audience\ f 
 For our design, most excellent spectators, 
 
 * Tharrelides was nicknamed Jackdaw, and Euelpides in contempt of 
 his jackdaw calls it a Tharrelides ! The raven and the jackdaw are 
 characteristic. Peisthetairus is the bearer of the sagacious bird, his com- 
 panion is equipped with a jackdaw. 
 
 t Peisthetairus, it will be seen, allows his companion to put himself 
 forward, with the newly discovered natives ; remaining himself in the back- 
 ground as the person of authority, making use of the other as his harbinger ; 
 he allows him also to address the audience, not choosing to compromise 
 himself by unnecessary communications. 
 
 The full and complete account of their motives and design is, moreover, 
 much better suited to the careless gossiping character of Euelpides,
 
 THE BIRDS. 1 8 1 
 
 (Our passion, our disease, or what you will) 
 Is the reverse of that which Sacas * feels ; 
 For he, though not a native, strives perforce 
 To make himself a citizen : whilst we, 
 Known and acknowledged as Athenians born, 
 (Not hustled off, nor otherwise compelled) 
 Have deemed it fitting to betake ourselves 
 To these our legs, and make our person scarce. 
 
 Not through disgust or hatred or disdain 
 Of our illustrious birthplace, which we deem 
 Glorious and free ; with equal laws ordained 
 For fine and forfeiture and confiscation, 
 With taxes universally diffused ; 
 And suits and pleas abounding in the Courts. 
 
 For grasshoppers sit only for a month 
 Chirping upon the twigs ; but our Athenians 
 Sit chirping and discussing all the year, 
 Perched upon points of evidence and law. 
 
 Therefore we trudge upon our present travels, 
 With these our sacrificial implements, 
 To seek some easier unlitigious place ; 
 Meaning to settle there and colonize. 
 Our present errand is in search of Tereus, 
 (The Hoopoe that is now) to learn from him 
 If in his expeditions, flights, and journeys, 
 He ever chanced to light on such a spot. 
 
 PEIS. Holloh! 
 
 Eu. What's that? 
 
 Peis. My raven here points 
 
 upwards. 
 Decidedly ! 
 
 * Acestor, a tragical poet, not being a genuine Athenian was called Sakas, 
 from the name of a Thracian tribe. 
 
 We may suppose that Peisthetairus must have accompanied this speech 
 with a grave authoritative gesture indicative of assent and approbation.
 
 182 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Eu. Ay, and here's my jackdaw too, 
 
 Gaping r.s if she saw something above. 
 Yes, I'll be bound for it ; this must be the place : 
 We'll make a noise, and know the truth of it. 
 
 PEIS. Then "kick against the rock." * 
 
 Eu. Knock you your 
 
 head 
 Against the rock ! and make it a double knock ! 
 
 PEIS. Then fling a stone at it ! 
 
 Eu. With all my heart, 
 
 Holloh there ! 
 
 PEIS. What do you mean with your Holloh ? 
 
 You should cry Hoop for a Hoopoe. 
 
 Eu. Well then, Hoop ! 
 
 Hoop and holloh, there ! Hoopoe, Hoopoe, I say ! 
 
 TR. What's here ? Who's bawling there ? Who wants 
 my master? 
 
 [ The door is opened, and both parties start at seeing 
 each other^\ 
 
 Eu. Oh mercy, mighty Apollo ! what a beak ! 
 
 TR. Out ! out upon it ! a brace of bird-catchers ! 
 
 Eu. No, no ; don't be disturbed ; think better of us. 
 
 TR. You'll both be put to death. 
 
 Eu. But we're not men. 
 
 TR. Not men! what are ye? what do ye call your- 
 selves? 
 
 Eu. The fright has turned me into a yellow-hammer. 
 
 TR. Poh ! Stuff and nonsense! 
 
 Eu. I can prove it to -ye. 
 
 Search ! 
 
 TR. But your comrade here ; what bird is he ? 
 
 PEIS. I'm changed to a golden pheasant just at 
 present. 
 
 * " To kick against the rock' was proverbial.
 
 THE BIRDS. 183 
 
 Eu. Now tell me, in heaven's name, what creature 
 are ye ? 
 
 TR. I'm a- slave bird. 
 
 Eu. A slave ? how did it happen ? 
 
 Were you made prisoner by a fighting cock ? 
 
 TR. No. When my master made himself a Hoopoe, 
 He begged me to turn bird to attend upon him. 
 
 Eu. Do birds then want attendance ? 
 
 TR. Yes, of course, 
 
 In his case, having been a man before, 
 He longs occasionally for human diet, 
 His old Athenian fare : pilchards, for instance. 
 Then I must fetch the pilchards ; sometimes porridge ; 
 He calls for porridge, and I mix it for him. 
 
 Eu.* Well, you're a dapper waiter, a didapper ; 
 But didapper, I say, do step within there, 
 And call your master out. 
 
 TR. But just at present 
 
 He's taking a little rest after his luncheon, 
 Some myrtle berries and a dish of worms. 
 
 Eu. No matter, call him here. We wish to speak to 
 him. 
 
 TR. He'll not be pleased, I'm sure; but notwithstand- 
 ing^ 
 Since you desire it, I'll make bold to call him. 
 
 [Exit. 
 
 PEIS. [looking after hini\. 
 Confound ye, I say, you've frightened me to death. 
 
 Eu. He has scared away my jackdaw ; it's flown away. 
 
 PEIS. You let it go yourself, you coward. 
 
 * The Trochilus has been unnecessarily communicative, and shown him- 
 self a very simple sort of a sewing-man ; Eu. has tact enough to discover 
 this, and assumes the ascendency accordingly. 
 
 t In the tone of Simple, Master Slender's serving man.
 
 184 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Eu. Tell me, 
 
 Have not you let your raven go ? 
 
 PEIS. Not I. 
 
 Eu. Where is it then ? 
 
 PEIS. Flown off of its own accord. 
 
 Eu. You did not let it go ! you're a brave fellow ! 
 \TJie HOOPOE from ^vithin^\ 
 
 Hoo. Open the door, I say ; let me go forth. 
 
 \The royal HOOPOE appears with a tremendous beak 
 and crest.} 
 
 Eu. O Hercules, what a creature ! What a plumage ! 
 And a triple tier of crests ; what can it be ! 
 
 Hoo. Who called ? who wanted me ? 
 
 Eu. May the heavenly powers .... 
 
 .... Confound ye, I say \_asidi\. 
 
 Hoo. You mock at me perhaps, 
 
 Seeing these plumes. But, stranger, you must know 
 That once I was a man. 
 
 Eu. We did not laugh 
 
 At you, Sir. 
 
 Hoo. What, then, were you laughing at? 
 
 Eu. Only that beak of yours seemed rather odd. 
 
 Hoo. It was your poet Sophocles * that reduced me 
 To this condition with his tragedies. 
 
 Eu. What are you, Tereus ? Are you a bird, or what ? 
 
 Hoo. A bird. 
 
 Eu. Then where are all your feathers ? 
 
 Hoo. Gone. 
 
 Eu. In consequence of an illness? 
 
 Hoo. No, the birds 
 
 At this time of the year leave off their feathers, 
 But you ! What are ye ? Tell me. 
 
 In his tragedy of " Tereus," Sophocles had represented him as trans- 
 formed (probably only in the last scenes) with the Lead and Leak of a bird.
 
 THE BIRDS. 185 
 
 Eu. Mortal men. 
 
 Hoo. What countrymen ? 
 
 Eu. Of the country of the Triremes.* 
 
 Hoo. Jurymen, I suppose ? 
 
 Eu. Quite the reverse, 
 
 We're anti-jurymen. 
 
 Hoo. Does that breed still 
 
 Continue amongst you ? 
 
 Eu. Some few specimens f 
 
 You'll meet with, here and there, in country places. 
 
 Hoo. And what has brought you here ? What was your 
 object ? 
 
 Eu. We wished to advise with you. 
 
 Hoo. With me ! For what ? 
 
 Eu. Because you were a man : the same as us ; 
 And found yourself in debt : the same as us ; 
 And did not like to pay : the same as us ; 
 And after that, you changed into a bird ; 
 And ever since have flown and wandered far 
 Over the lands and seas, and have acquired 
 All knowledge that a bird or man can learn. 
 
 Therefore we come as suppliants, to beseech 
 Your favour and advice to point us out 
 Some comfortable country, close and snug, 
 A country like a blanket or a rug, 
 Where we might fairly fold ourselves to rest. 
 
 Hoo. Do you wish then for a greater State than 
 Athens ? 
 
 Eu. Not greater ; but more suitable for us. 
 
 Hoo. It's clear you're fond of aristocracy. 
 
 * Galleys with three banks of oars. The Athenians were at that time 
 undisputed masters of the sea. 
 
 t The love of litigation and the passion for sitting on juries, with the 
 exception of a few who retained their old agricultural habits, had infected 
 the whole Athenian community.
 
 1 86 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Eu. What him, the son of Scellias ! Aristocrates ? * 
 I abhor him. 
 
 Hoo. Well, what kind of a town would suit ye? 
 
 Eu. Why, such a kind of town as this, for instance, 
 A town where the importunities and troubles 
 Are of this sort. Suppose a neighbour calls 
 Betimes in the morning with a sudden summons : 
 " Now, don't forget," says he, " for heaven's sake, 
 To come to me to-morrow, bring your friends, 
 Children and all, we've wedding cheer at home. 
 Come early, mind ye, and if you fail me now, 
 Don't let me see your face, when I'm in trouble." 
 
 Hoo. So, you're resolved to encounter all these hard- 
 ships ! 
 
 \to PEISTHETAIRUS] 
 And what say you ? 
 
 PEIS. My fancy's much the same. 
 
 Hoo. How so? 
 
 PEIS. To find a place of the same sort 
 
 A kind of place, where a good jolly father 
 Meets and attacks me thus " What's come to ye 
 With my young people ? You don't take to 'em. 
 What ! they're not reckoned ugly ! You might treat 'em, 
 As an old friend, with a little attention surely, 
 And take a trifling civil freedom with 'em." 
 
 Hoo. Ay ! You're in love I see with difficulties 
 And miseries. Well, there's a city in fact 
 Much of this sort ; one that I think might suit ye, 
 Near the Red Sea. 
 
 Eu. No, no ! not near the sea ! f 
 
 * Little or nothing is known of Aristocrates. He lived to the end of the 
 war, and acted in concert with Thrasybulus against Critias. "Dem. in 
 Timoc. ' 
 
 t A humorous blunder. The Red Sea was in fact as inaccessible to 
 ancient European navigation as the Caspian.
 
 THE BIRDS. xS; 
 
 Lest I should have the Salaminian galley * 
 Arriving some fine morning, with a summons 
 Sent after me, and a pursuivant to arrest me. 
 
 But could not you tell us of some Grecian city ? 
 
 Hoo. Why there's in Elis there, the town of Lepreum. 
 
 Eu. No, no ! No Lepreums : nor no lepers neither. 
 No leprosies for me. Melanthius t 
 Has given me a disgust for leprosies. 
 
 Hoo. Then there's Opuntius in the land of Locris. 
 
 Eu. Opuntius ? Me to be like Opuntius ! J 
 With his one eye ! Not for a thousand drachmas. 
 
 But tell me among the birds here, how do ye find it ? 
 What kind of an existence ? 
 
 Hoo. Pretty fair ; 
 
 Not much amiss. Time passes smoothly enough; 
 And money is out of the question. We don't use it 
 
 Eu. You've freed yourselves from a great load of dross. 
 
 Hoo. We've our field sports. We spend our idle mornings 
 With banqueting and collations in the gardens, 
 With poppy-seeds and myrtle. 
 
 Eu. So your time 
 
 Is passed like a perpetual wedding-day. 
 
 [PEISTHETAIRUS, who has hitherto felt his way by 
 putting EUELPIDES forward, and allowing him to 
 take the lead, and who has paid no attention to 
 this trifling inconclusive conversation, breaks out 
 as from a profound reflective reverie.] 
 
 * The Salaminian galley had been sent to arrest Alcibiades, then one of 
 the joint commanders in Sicily. This was one of the most fatal acts of that 
 popular insanity which it was the poet's object to mitigate and counteract. 
 
 t A tragic poet, said to have been leprous, ridiculed elsewhere by the 
 author, and by other comic poets, as Plato and Callias. 
 
 t Nothing is recorded of Opuntius, except that he was reckoned a 
 poltroon, and was blind of one eye.
 
 1 88 THE BIRDS. 
 
 PEIS. Ha ! What a po\ver is here ! What oppor- 
 tunities ! 
 
 If I could only advise you. I see it all ! 
 The means for an infinite empire and command ! 
 
 Hoo. And what would you have us do ? What's your 
 advice ? 
 
 PEIS. Do ? What would I have ye do ? Why first of all 
 Don't flutter and hurry about all open-mouthed, 
 In that undignified way. With us, for instance, 
 At home, we should cry out "What creature's that?" 
 And Teleas would be the first to answer, 
 " A mere poor creature, a weak restless animal, 
 A silly bird, that's neither here nor there." * 
 
 Hoo. Yes, Teleas might say so. // would be like him. 
 But tell me, what would you have us do ? 
 
 PEIS. \emphatically\. Concentrate ! 
 
 Bring all your birds together. Build a city. 
 
 Hoo. The birds ! How could we build a city ? Where ? 
 
 PEIS. Nonsense. You can't be serious. What a question ! 
 Look down. 
 
 Hoo. I do. 
 
 PEIS. Look up now. 
 
 Hoo. So I do. 
 
 PEIS. Now turn your neck round. t 
 
 Hoo. I should sprain it though, 
 
 PEIS. Come, what d'ye see ? 
 
 Hoo. The clouds and sky ; that's all. 
 
 PEIS. Well, that we call the pole and the atmosphere ; 
 And would it not serve you birds for a metropole ? 
 
 * The lines between inverted commas may be understood either as the 
 words of Teleas or as a description of him ; the ambiguity exists in the 
 original and js evidently intentional. It is continued in the next line of the 
 Hoopoe's answer. 
 
 t See in "The Knights" a similar instance of ridiculous stage effect, 
 where the Sausage-seller is mounted on his stool to survey the Athenian 
 Empire.
 
 THE AlftDS. 189 
 
 Hoo. Pole ? Is it called a pole ? 
 
 PEIS. Yes, that's the name. 
 
 Philosophers of late call it the pole ; 
 Because it wheels and rolls itself about, 
 As it were, in a kind of a roly-poly way.* 
 Well, there then, you may build and fortify, 
 And call it your Metropolis your Acropolis. 
 From that position you'll command mankind, 
 And keep them in utter, thorough subjugation : 
 Just as you do the grasshoppers and locusts. 
 And if the gods offend you, you'll blockade 'em, 
 And starve 'em to a surrender. 
 
 Hoo. In what way? 
 
 PEIS. Why thus. Your atmosphere is placed, you see, 
 In a middle point, just betwixt earth and heaven. 
 
 A case of the same kind occurs with us. 
 Our people in Athens, if they send to Delphi 
 With deputations, offerings, or what not, 
 Are forced to obtain a pass from the Boeotians : 
 Thus when mankind on earth are sacrificing, 
 If you should find the gods grown mutinous 
 And insubordinate, you could intercept 
 All their supplies of sacrificial smoke. 
 
 Hoo. By the earth and all its springs ! springes and 
 
 nooses ! f 
 
 Odds, nets and snares ! This is the cleverest notion : 
 And I could find it in my heart to venture, 
 If the other birds agree to the proposal. 
 
 PEIS. But who must state it to them ? 
 
 Hoo. You yourself, 
 
 * The comic poets ridiculed the new prevailing passion for astronomical 
 and physical science. See further on the Parabasis and the scene where 
 Melon the astronomer is introduced. 
 
 t The Hoopoe's exclamation and oath are in the original, as they are 
 here represented, exactly in the style of Bob Acres.
 
 1 9 o THE BIRDS. 
 
 They'll understand ye, I found them mere barbarians, 
 
 But living here a length of time amongst them, 
 
 I have taught them to converse and speak correctly. * 
 
 PEIS. How will you summon them? 
 
 Hoo. That's easy enough; 
 
 I'll just step into the thicket here hard by, 
 And call my nightingale. She'll summon them. 
 And when they hear her voice, I promise you 
 You'll see them all come running here pell-melLf 
 
 PEIS. My dearest, best of birds ! don't lose a moment, 
 I beg, but go directly into the thicket ; 
 Nay, don't stand here, go call your nightingale. 
 
 [Exit HOOPOE. 
 
 [Song from behind the scene, supposed to be sung by (he 
 HOOPOE.] 
 
 Awake ! awake ! 
 
 Sleep no more, my gentle mate ! 
 With your tiny tawny bill, 
 Wake the tuneful echo shrill, 
 
 On vale or hill ; 
 Or in her airy, rocky seat, 
 Let her listen and repeat 
 
 The tender ditty that you tell, 
 The sad lament, 
 The dire event, 
 To luckless Itys that befell. 
 Thence the strain 
 Shall rise again, 
 And soar amain, 
 
 * The characteristic impertinence of a predominant people, considering 
 their own language as that which ought to be universally spoken. 
 
 t A female performer on the flute, a great favourite of the public and 
 with the poet, after a long absence from Athens engaged to perform in this 
 play, which was exhibited with an unusual recklessness of expense.
 
 THE BIRDS. 191 
 
 Up to the lofty palace gate ; 
 Where mighty Apollo sits in state ; 
 In Jove's abode, with his ivory lyre, 
 Hymning aloud to the heavenly choir. 
 While all the gods shall join with thee 
 In a celestial symphony. 
 
 \A solo on the flute, supposed to be the nightingale's call.~\ 
 
 PEIS. O Jupiter ! the dear, delicious bird ! 
 With what a lovely tone she swells and falls, 
 Sweetening the wilderness with delicate air. 
 Eu. Hist ! 
 PEIS. What ? 
 
 Eu. Be quiet, can't ye ? 
 
 PEIS. What's the matter ? 
 
 Eu. The Hoopoe is just preparing for a song. 
 Hoo. Hoop ! hoop ! 
 
 Come in a troop, 
 Come at a call, 
 One and all, 
 Birds of a feather, 
 All together. 
 
 Birds of a humble, gentle bill, 
 Smooth and shrill, 
 Dieted on seeds and grain, 
 Rioting on the furrowed plain, 
 Pecking, hopping, 
 Picking, popping, 
 Among the barley newly sown. 
 
 Birds of bolder, louder tone, 
 Lodging in the shrubs and bushes, 
 Mavises and thrushes, 
 On the summer berries brousing, 
 On the garden fruits carousing, 
 All the grubs and vermin smousing.
 
 1 92 THE BIRDS. 
 
 You that in a humbler station, 
 With an active occupation, 
 Haunt the lowly watery mead, 
 Warring against the native breed, 
 
 The gnats and flies, your enemies ; 
 In the level marshy plain 
 Of Marathon, pursued and slain. 
 
 You that in a squadron driving 
 From the seas are seen arriving, 
 
 With the cormorants and mews 
 Haste to land and hear the news ! 
 
 All the feathered airy nation, 
 Birds of every size and station, 
 Are convened in convocation. 
 
 For an envoy, queer and shrewd, 
 
 Means to address the multitude, 
 And submit to their decision 
 A surprising proposition, 
 For the welfare of the State 
 
 Come in a flurry, 
 
 With a hurry-scurry, 
 Hurry to the meeting and attend to the debate. 
 
 The first appearance of the Chorus must have been a critical point for 
 the success of a play. Tiie audience had been brought into good- 
 humour by their favourite musical performer, by whom all the pre- 
 ceding songs were probably executed ; for the dialogue on the stage 
 passes solely between Peisthetairus and Euelpides, and the Hoopoe, 
 who is supposed to sing, does not appear. The Chorus now appears, 
 and in the original, forty lines follow, in which Peisthetairus and 
 Euelpides act as showmen to the exhibition of twenty-four figures, 
 dressed in imitation of the plumage of as many different kinds of 
 birds,* which are passed in review with suitable remarks as they 
 
 See what is said in p. 184, of the profuse expense bestowed on the exhi- 
 bition of this play.
 
 BIRDS. 193 
 
 successively take their places in the orchestra. This passage is here 
 omitted. Whoever wishes to see how well it can be executed, may 
 be referred to Mr. Gary's translation. 
 
 While the birds are bustling about in their new coop of the orchestra, 
 Euelpides contemplates them with surprise, which soon changes to 
 alarm. 
 
 The langunge of the birds consists almost wholly of short syllables, the 
 effect of which it is impossible to imitate in English. Some accents, 
 which are added, may serve to mark the attempt : they are added 
 also to two spondaic lines, of which the imitation is more practi- 
 cable. 
 
 Eu. How they thicken, how they muster, 
 How they clutter, how they cluster ! 
 Now they ramble here and thither, 
 Now they scramble altogether. 
 What a fidgeting and clattering ! 
 What a twittering and chattering, 
 Don't they mean to threaten us ? What think ye ? 
 PEIS. Yes, methinks they do. 
 
 Eu. They're gaping with an angry look against us 
 
 both. 
 
 PEIS. It's very true. 
 
 CHOR. Where is he, the magistrate that assembled us to 
 
 deliberate. 
 Hoo. Friends and comrades, here am I, your old associate 
 
 and ally. 
 CHOR. What have ye to communicate for the benefit of 
 
 the State. 
 
 Hoo. A proposal safe and useful, practicable, profitable, 
 Two projectors are arrived here, politicians shrewd and 
 
 able. 
 CHOR. Whee ! Whaw ! Where ? Where ? 
 
 What? What? What? What? What? 
 Hoo. I repeat it human envoys are arrived a steady 
 
 pair, 
 
 To disclose without reserve a most stupendous, huge affair. 
 
 G
 
 194 THE BIRDS. 
 
 CHOR. Chief, of all that ever were, the worst, the most 
 
 unhappy one ! 
 Speak, explain ! 
 
 Hoo. Don't be alarmed ! 
 
 CHOR. Alas ! alas ! what have you done ? 
 
 Hoo. I've received a pair of strangers, who desired to 
 
 settle here. 
 
 CHOR. Have you risked so rash an act ? 
 Hoo. I've done it, and I persevere. 
 
 CHOR. But, where are they ? 
 
 Hoo. Near beside you ; near as I am ; very near. 
 
 CHOR. Out alas ! out alas ! 
 
 We are betrayed, cruelly betrayed 
 To a calamitous end, 
 Our cdmrade and our frie'nd, 
 Our companion in the fields and in the pastures 
 Is the author of all our miseries and disasters. 
 
 Our ancient sacred laws and solemn oath ! 
 
 Transgressing both ! 
 Treasonably delivering us as a prize 
 To our hdrrible immemorial enemies, 
 To a detestable ra"ce 
 Execrably base ! 
 For the bird our chief, hereafter he must answer to the 
 
 State ; 
 With respect to these intruders, I propose, without 
 
 debate, 
 On the spot to tear and hack them. 
 
 Eu. There it is, our death and ruin ! 
 
 Ah, the fault was all your own, you know it ; it was all your 
 
 doing ; 
 You that brought me here ; and why ? 
 
 PEIS. Because I wanted an attendant. 
 
 Eu. Here, to close my life in tears. 
 
 PEIS. No, thats a foolish fear, depend on't.
 
 THE BIRDS. 195 
 
 Eu. Why a foolish fear ? 
 
 PEIS. Consider; when you're left without an eye, 
 
 It's impossible in nature ; how could you contrive to cry ? 
 CHOR. Form in rank, form in rank ; 
 
 Then move forward and outflank : 
 Let me see them overpowered, 
 Hacked, demolished and devoured; 
 Neither earth, nor sea, nor sky, 
 Nor woody fastnesses on high, 
 Shall protect them if they fly ? 
 Where's the Captain ? What detains him ? What prevents 
 
 us to proceed ? 
 On the right there, call the Captain ! Let him form his 
 
 troop and lead. 
 
 Eu. There it is, where can I fly? 
 
 PEIS. Sirrah, be quiet, wait a bit. 
 
 Eu. What, to be devoured amongst them ! 
 PEIS. Will your legs or will your wit 
 
 Serve to escape them ? 
 
 Eu. I can't tell. 
 
 PEIS. But I can tell ; do as you're bid ; 
 
 Fight we must ; you see the pot, just there before ye ; take 
 
 the lid, 
 And present it for a shield ; the spit will serve you for a 
 
 spear ; 
 With it you may scare them off, or spike them if they venture 
 
 near. 
 
 Eu. What can I find to guard my eyes? 
 PEIS. Why there's the very thing you wish, 
 
 Two vizard helmets ready made, the cullender and skim- 
 ming dish. 
 
 Eu. What a clever, capital, lucky device, sudden and new! 
 Nicias * with all his tactics, is a simpleton to you. 
 
 * Nicias was at this time in the chief command of the Sicilian expedition, 
 Alcibiades having been recalled. See note to p. 187. , 
 
 G 2
 
 I 9 6 THE BIRDS. 
 
 CHOR. Steady, birds ! present your beaks ! in double time, 
 
 charge and attack, 
 Pounce upon them, smash the potlid, clapperclaw them, tear 
 
 and hack. 
 Hoo. Tell me, most unworthy creatures, scandal of the 
 
 feathered race ; 
 Must I see my friends and kinsmen massacred before my 
 
 face? 
 CHOR. What, do you propose to spare them ? where will 
 
 your forbearance cease, 
 
 Hesitating to destroy destructive creatures such as these ? 
 Hoo. Enemies they might have been; but here they 
 
 come, with fair design, 
 
 With proposals of advice, for your advantage and for mine. 
 CKOR. Enemies time out of mind ! they that have spilt 
 
 our fathers' blood, 
 How should they be friends of ours, or give us counsel for 
 
 our good ? 
 Hoo. Friendship is a poor adviser ; politicians deep and 
 
 wise 
 
 Many times are forced to learn a lesson from their enemies ; 
 Diligent and wary conduct is the method soon or late 
 Which an adversary teaches ; whilst a friend or intimate 
 Trains us on to sloth and ease, to ready confidence ; to 
 
 rest, 
 
 In a careless acquiescence ; to believe and hope the best. 
 Look on earth ! * behold the nations, all in emulation 
 
 vicing, 
 
 Active all, with busy science engineering, fortifying ; 
 To defend their hearths and homes, with patriotic industry, 
 Fencing every city round with massy walls of masonry : 
 
 The vast changes and improvement in the practice and the art of war 
 which took place about this time were a subject of general speculation and 
 remark. The concise allusions in the text, are therefore somewhat enlarged 
 in the translation.
 
 THE BIRDS. 197 
 
 Tactical devices old they modify with new design ; 
 Arms offensive and defensive to perfection they refine ; 
 Galleys are equipped and armed, and armies trained to dis- 
 cipline. 
 
 Look to life, in every part; in all they practise, all they know; 
 Every nation has derived its best instruction from the foe. 
 CHOR. We're agreed to grant a hearing ; if an enemy can 
 
 teach 
 Anything that's wise or useful, let him prove it in his 
 
 speech. 
 PEIS. \aside\. Let's retire a pace or two; you see the change 
 
 in their behaviour. 
 Hoo. Simple justice I require, and I request it as a 
 
 favour. 
 
 CHOR. Faith and equity require it, and the nation hitherto 
 Never has refused to take direction and advice from you. 
 PEIS. \_aside\. They're relenting by degrees ; 
 
 Recover arms and stand at ease. 
 CHOR.* Back to the rear ! resume your station, 
 Ground your wrath and indignation ! 
 Sheathe your fury ! stand at ease, 
 While I proceed to question these : 
 What design has brought them here ? 
 Ho, there, Hoopoe ! can't he hear? 
 Hoo. What's your question ? 
 CHOR. Who are these ? 
 
 Hoo. Strangers from the land of Greece. 
 CHOR. What design has brought them thence ? 
 
 What's their errand or pretence ? 
 Hoo. They come here simply with a view 
 To settle and reside with you ; 
 Here to remain and here to live. 
 
 * Thirteen lines, which unaccompanied by the action on the stage would 
 appear tiresome and unmeaning, are here omitted from 387 to 400.
 
 198 THE BIRDS. 
 
 CHOR. What is the reason that they give ? 
 Hoo. A project marvellous and strange. 
 CHOR. Will it account for such a change, 
 
 Coming here so vast a distance ? 
 
 Does he look for our assistance 
 
 To serve a friend or harm a foe ? 
 Hoo. Mighty plans he has to show 
 
 (Hinted and proposed in brief) 
 
 For a power beyond belief ; 
 
 Ocean, earth, he says, and air, 
 
 All creation everywhere, 
 
 Everything that's here or there, 
 
 An empire and supremacy 
 
 Over all beneath the sky, 
 
 Is attainable by you, 
 
 Your just dominion and your due. 
 CHOR. Tell us, was he fool or mad ? 
 Hoo. No, believe me \ grave and sad. 
 CHOR. Did his reasons and replies 
 
 Mark him as discreet and wise ? 
 Hoo. With a force, a depth, a reach 
 
 Of judgment ; a command of speech ; 
 
 An invention, a facility, 
 
 An address, a volubility, 
 
 More than could be thought believable ; 
 
 J Tis a varlet inconceivable ! 
 CHOR. Let us hear him ! let us hear him ! 
 
 Bid him begin ! for raised on high 
 
 Our airy fancy soars ; and I 
 
 Am rapt in hope ; ready to fly. 
 
 The King Hoopoe now gives some orders in a pacific spirit, directing 
 that all warlike weapons be removed and hin-g up at the back of the 
 chimney as before. He then calls upon Peislhetairus to communi- 
 cate to the assembled commonalty the propositions which had been 
 before discussed in private conference between themselves. Teisthe-
 
 THE BIRDS. 199 
 
 tairus, however, sees his advantage and insists upon the previous 
 conclusion of a formal treaty of peace: this is done, and the Chorus 
 swear to it (relapsing for a moment into their real character) " as they 
 hope to win the prize by a unanimous vote." But if they should 
 fail they imprecate upon themselves the penalty of (gaining the prize 
 notwithstanding, but) "gaining it only by a casting vote." Peace 
 is proclaimed, the armament is dissolved by proclamation, and the 
 Chorus recommenced singing. 
 
 [to the CHORUS] 
 Hoo. Here you, take these same arms, in the name of 
 
 heaven, 
 And hang them quietly in the chimney corner ; 
 
 [turning to PEISTHETAIRUS] 
 And you communicate your scheme, exhibiting 
 Your proofs and calculations the discourse 
 Which they were called to attend to. 
 PEIS. No, not I ! 
 
 By Jove ; unless they agree to an armistice ; 
 Such as the little poor baboon, our neighbour, 
 The sword cutler, concluded with his wife ; 
 That they sha'n't bite me, or take unfair advantage 
 In any way. 
 
 CHOR. We won't. 
 
 PEIS. Well, swear it then ! 
 
 CHOR. We swear ; by our hope of gaining the first prize, 
 With the general approval and consent, 
 Of the whole audience, and of all the judges 
 And if we fail, may the reproach befall us, 
 Of gaining it, only by the casting vote. 
 
 It should seem that the success of this play must have been a subject of 
 more than usual anxiety both to the poet himself, and to the Cho- 
 regus * and his friends : we may conceive it to have been intended as 
 a sedative to the mind of the commonalty, excited as they were at 
 
 * The wealthy citizen charged with the expense and management of a 
 theatrical entertainment.
 
 200 THE BIRDS. 
 
 the time, almost to madness by the suspicion of a conspiracy against 
 the religion and laws of the country ; a suspicion originating in a 
 profane outrage secretly perpetrated, to a great extent, in mere inso- 
 lence and wantonness, by some young men of family. In the opinion, 
 however, of the Athenian people, the offence was viewed in a very 
 serious light, as the result of an extensive secret combination (on 
 the part of persons bound and engag-d to each other by their com- 
 mon participation in the guilt of sacrilege), preparatory to other 
 attempts still more criminal and dangerous. In this state of tilings, 
 and while the popular fury and jealousy upon religious subjects was 
 at its height, the poet ventured to produce this play ; in which it 
 will be seen, that the burlesque of the national mythology is carried 
 higher and continued longer than in any of his other existing plays. 
 The confident hopes expressed by the Chorus were not realized ; the 
 first prize was assigned to a play the title of which, the " Comastae," 
 or "Drunken Rioters," seems to imply that its chief interest must 
 have been derived from direct allusions to the outrage above men- 
 tioned, and to the individuals suspected to have been engaged in it. 
 
 But we must return to the Herald dismissing the troops. 
 
 HER. Hear, ye good people all 1 the troop are ordered, 
 To take their arms within doors ; and consult 
 On the report and entry to be made 
 Upon our journal of this day's proceedings. 
 
 CHOR. Since time began 
 The race of man 
 Has ever been deceitful, faithless ever. 
 
 Yet may our fears be vain ! 
 
 Speak therefore and explain : 
 
 If in this realm of ours, 
 Your clearer intellect, searching and clever, 
 
 Has noticed means or powers, 
 
 Unknown and undetected, 
 In unambitious indolence neglected. 
 Guide and assist our ignorant endeavour : 
 You for your willing aid, and ready wit, 
 Will share with us the common benefit.
 
 THE BIRDS. 201 
 
 Now speak to the business and be not afraid 
 The birds will adhere to the truce that we made. 
 
 The long series of anapsestic lines which follows, holds the place of 
 the debates which occur in other comedies, and which are conducted 
 in anapses'ic verse. Peisthetahus could not proper" y have been 
 matched with an opponent or antagonist ; the uniformity of his speech 
 is, however, relieved by the interruptions and comments of Euelpides, 
 who acts an under part to him, much in the same style as a merry- 
 andrew to a mountebank. Observe that Peisthetairus never vouch- 
 safes an answer or takes any kind of notice of his companion, but 
 proceeds continuously, except once or twice in reply to the Chorus 
 and the Hoopoe. 
 
 PEIS. I'm filled with the subject and long to proceed, 
 My rhetorical leaven is ready to knead. 
 Boy, bring me a crown * and a basin and ewer. 
 
 Eu. Why, what does he mean ? Are we banqueting sure ? 
 
 PEIS. A rhetorical banquet, I mean ; and I wish 
 To serve them at first with a sumptuous dish, 
 To astound and delight them.f " The grief and compas- 
 sion 
 
 That oppresses my mind on beholding a naticn 
 A people of sovereigns . . . ." 
 
 CHOR. Sovereigns we ! 
 
 PEIS. Of all the creation ! of this man and me, 
 And of Jupiter too ; for observe that your birth 
 Was before the old Titans, and Saturn and Earth. 
 
 CHOR. And Earth ! 
 
 PEIS. I repeat it. 
 
 CHOR. That's wonderful news ! 
 
 PEIS. Your wonder implies a neglect to peruse, 
 And examine old ^Esop ; from whom you might gather, 
 
 * A crown was worn by the public orators when haranguing the people, 
 and also at feasts. 
 
 t The inverted commas mark the prenieditatedly abrupt exordium of 
 Peisthetairus's harangue.
 
 202 THE BIRDS. 
 
 That the lark was embarrassed to bury his father; 
 On account of the then non-existence of Earth ; 
 And how to repair so distressing a dearth, 
 He adopted a method unheard of and new. 
 
 CHOR. If the story you quote, is authentic and true, 
 No doubt can exist of our clear seniority ; 
 And the gods must acknowledge our right to authority. 
 
 Eu. Your beaks will be worn with distinction and pride ; 
 The woodpecker's title will scarce be denied ; 
 And Jove the pretender, will surely surrender. 
 
 PEIS Moreover, most singular facts are combined 
 
 In proof, that the birds were adored by mankind : 
 For instance ; the cock was a sovereign of yore 
 In the empire of Persia, and ruled it before 
 Darius's time ; and you all may have heard, 
 That his title exists, as the " Persian bird." . . . 
 
 Eu. And hence you behold him stalk in pride, 
 Majestic and stout, with a royal stride, 
 With his turban upright, a privilege known 
 Reserved to kings and kings alone. 
 
 PEIS So wide was his empire, so mighty his sway, 
 
 That the people of earth to the present day, 
 Attend to his summons and freely obey : 
 Tinkers, tanners, cobblers, all, 
 Are roused from rest at his royal call, 
 And shuffle their shoes on before it is light, 
 To trudge to the workshop. 
 
 Eu. I warrant you're right ; 
 
 I know to my cost, by the cloak that I lost ; 
 It was owing to him I was robbed and beguiled. 
 
 For a feast had been made for a neighbour's child, 
 To give it a name ; and I went as a guest, 
 And sat there carousing away with the rest ; 
 But drinking too deep, I fell soundly asleep; 
 And he began crowing ; and I never knowing,
 
 THE BIRDS. 203 
 
 But thinking it morning, went off at the warning, 
 
 (With the wine in my pate, to the city gate 
 
 And fell in with a footpad was lying in wait, 
 
 Just under the town ; and was fairly knocked down; 
 
 Then I tried to call out ; but before I could shout, 
 
 He stripped me at once with a sudden pull, 
 
 Of a bran new mantle of Phrygian wool. 
 
 PEIS Then the kite was the monarch of Greece 
 
 heretofore .... 
 
 Hoo. Of Greece? 
 
 PEIS. .... and instructed our fathers of yore, 
 
 On beholding a kite, to fall down and adore .... 
 
 Eu. Well, a thing that befell me, was comical quite, 
 I threw myself down en beholding a kite ; 
 But turning my face up to stare at his flight, 
 With a coin in my mouth,* forgetting my penny, 
 I swallowed it down, and went home without any. 
 
 PEIS In Sidon and Egypt the cuckoo was 
 
 king; 
 
 They wait to this hour for the cuckoo to sing ; 
 And when he begins, be it later or early, 
 They reckon it lawful to gather their barley .... 
 
 Eu. Ah, thence it comes our harvest cry, 
 Cuckoo, Cuckoo, to the passers-by. 
 
 PEIS At an era moreover of modern date, 
 
 Menelaus the king, Agamemnon the great, 
 Had a bird as assessor attending in state, 
 Perched on his sceptre, to watch for a share 
 Of fees and emoluments, secret or fair. 
 
 Eu. Ah, there I perceive, I was right in my guess, 
 For when Priam appeared in his tragical dress, 
 
 * It was usual with the Greeks to put small pieces of silver coin in their 
 mouths, a custom which the turnpike men of Great Britain continued to 
 retain within the recollection of the writer.
 
 204 THE BIRDS. 
 
 The bird on his sceptre, I plainly could see, 
 Was watching Lysicrates * taking a fee. 
 
 PEIS. . . . Nay, Jupiter now that usurps the command, 
 Appears with an eagle, appointed to stand 
 As his emblem of empire; a striking example 
 Of authority once so extended and ample : 
 And each of the gods had his separate fowl, 
 Apollo a hawk, and Minerva an owl. 
 
 Eu.f That's matter of fact and you're right in the main ; 
 But what was the reason I wish you'd explain ? 
 
 PEIS. The reason was this : that the bird should be there, 
 To demand as of right a proportional share, 
 Of the entrails and fat, when an offering was made, 
 A suitable portion before them was laid : 
 Moreover you'll find, that the race of mankind 
 Always swore by a bird 5 and it never was heard 
 That they swore by the gods, at the time that I mention. 
 And Lamponj himself, with a subtle intention, 
 Adheres to the old immemorial use ; 
 He perjures and cheats us and swears " by the goose." 
 
 Thus far forth have I proved and shown 
 The power and estate that were once your own, 
 Now totally broken and overthrown : 
 And need I describe, your present tribe, 
 Weak, forlorn, exposed to scorn, 
 Distressed, oppressed, never at rest, 
 Daily pursued, with outrage rude ; 
 
 * Of Lysicrates, the Scholiast only informs us that he was a person in 
 office known to be in the habit of taking bribes, a description which in rela- 
 tion to those times is hardly a distinction. 
 
 t This speech seems more properly to belong to the Hoopoe. 
 
 | As a substitute for common swearing, some persons (Socrates among 
 tlie rest) made use of less offensive expletives, swearing " by the dog or by 
 the goose." Lampon was a soothsayer, and thought it right probably to 
 be scrupulous in using the name of the god. He is mentioned again in this 
 play.
 
 THE BIRDS. 205 
 
 With cries and noise, of men and boys, 
 Screaming, hooting, pelting, shooting, 
 The fowler sets his traps and nets, 
 Twigs of bird-lime, loops, and snares, 
 To catch you kidnapped unawares ; 
 Even within the temple's pale. 
 
 They set you forth to public sale, 
 Pawed and handled most severely : 
 And not content with roasting merely, 
 In an insolent device, 
 Sprinkle you with cheese and spice ; 
 With nothing of respect or favour, 
 Derogating from your flavour. 
 Or for a further outrage, have ye 
 Soused in greasy sauce and gravy. 
 
 Hoo. Sad and dismal is the story, 
 
 Human stranger which you tell, 
 Of our fathers' ancient glory, 
 Ere the fated empire fell, 
 
 From the depth of degradation, 
 
 A benignant happy fate 
 Sends you to restore the nation ; 
 
 To redeem and save the State. 
 
 I consign to your protection, 
 
 Able to preserve them best, 
 All my objects of affection, 
 
 My wife, my children, and my nest. 
 
 If the reader should be inclined to pass over the next hundred lines, I 
 should feel no wish to detain him. The subject of them has been 
 pretty nearly anticipated, and the whole play is in fact too long. 
 
 Hoo. Explain then the method you mean to pursue 
 To recover our empire and freedom anew.
 
 2 o6 THE BIRDS. 
 
 For thus to remain, in dishonour and scorn, 
 Our life were a burthen no more to be borne. 
 
 PEIS. Then I move, that the birds shall in common repair 
 To a centrical point, and encamp in the air ; 
 And intrench and enclose it, and fortify there : 
 And build up a rampart, impregnably strong, 
 Enormous in thickness, enormously long; 
 Bigger than Babylon ; solid and tall, 
 With bricks and bitumen, a wonderful wall. 
 
 Eu. Bricks and bitumen ! I'm longing to see 
 What a daub of a building the city will be ! 
 
 PEIS. As soon as the fabric is brought to an end, 
 A herald or envoy to Jove we shall send, 
 To require his immediate prompt abdication ; 
 And if he refuses, or shows hesitation, 
 Or evades the demand ; we shall further proceed, 
 With legitimate warfare avowed and decreed : 
 With a warning and notices, formally given, 
 To Jove, and all others residing in heaven, 
 Forbidding them ever to venture again 
 To trespass on our atmospheric domain, 
 With scandalous journeys, to visit a list 
 Of Alcmenas and Semeles ; if they persist, 
 We warn them, that means will be taken moreover 
 To stop their gallanting and acting the lover. 
 
 Another ambassador also will go 
 Despatched upon earth, to the people below, 
 To notify briefly the fact of accession ; 
 And enforcing our claims upon taking possession : 
 With orders in future, that every suitor, 
 Who applies to the gods with an offering made, 
 Shall begin, with a previous offering paid 
 To a suitable bird ; of a kind and degree 
 That accords with the god, whosoever he be. 
 In Venus's fane, if a victim is slain,
 
 THE BIRDS. 207 
 
 First let a sparrow be feasted with grain. 
 When gifts and oblations to Neptune are made, 
 To the drake let a tribute of barley be paid. 
 Let the cormorant's appetite* first be appeased, 
 And let'Hercules then have an ox for his feast. 
 If you offer to Jove, as the sovereign above, 
 A ram for his own ; let the golden-crown, 
 As a sovereign bird, be duly preferred, 
 Feasted and honoured, in right of his reign ; 
 With a jolly fat pismire offered and slain. 
 
 Eu. A pismire, how droll ! I shall laugh till I burst ! 
 Let Jupiter thunder, and threaten his worst. 
 
 Hoo. But mankind, will they, think ye, respect and 
 
 adore, 
 
 If they see us all flying the same as before ? 
 They will reckon us merely as magpies and crows. 
 
 PEIS. Poh ! nonsense, I tell ye no blockhead but 
 
 knows 
 
 That Mercury flies ; there is Iris too ; 
 Homer informs us how she flew : 
 "Smooth as a dove, she went sailing along." 
 And pinions of gold, both in picture and song, 
 To Cupid and Victory fairly belong. 
 
 PIoo. But Jove's thunder has wings; if he send but a 
 
 volley, 
 Mankind for a time may abandon us wholly. 
 
 PEIS. What then ? we shall raise a granivorous troop, 
 To sweep their whole crops with a ravenous swoop : 
 If Ceres is able, perhaps she may deign, 
 To assist their distress, with a largess of grain 
 
 Eu. No ! no ! she'll be making excuses, I warrant. 
 
 PEIS. Then the crows will be sent on a different errand, 
 
 * With the writers of the old comedy extreme voracity was the character- 
 istic attribute of Hercules,
 
 2 o8 THE BIRDS. 
 
 To pounce all at once, with a sudden surprise, 
 On their oxen and sheep, to peck out their eyes, 
 And leave them stone blind for Apollo to cure : 
 He'll try it ; he'll work for his salary sure ! 
 
 Eu. Let the cattle alone ; I've two beeves of my own : 
 Let me part with them first ; and then do your worst. 
 
 PEIS. But, if men shall acknowledge your merit and 
 
 worth, 
 
 As equal to Saturn, to Neptune, and Earth, 
 And to everything else ; we shall freely bestow 
 All manner of blessings. 
 
 Hoo. Explain them and show. 
 
 PEIS. For instance : if locusts arrive to consume 
 All their hopes of a crop, when the vines are in bloom, 
 A squadron of owls may demolish them all ; 
 The midges moreover, which canker and gall 
 The figs and the fruit, if the thrush is employed, 
 By a single battalion will soon be destroyed. 
 
 Hoo. But wealth is their object; and how can we 
 
 grant it? 
 PEIS. We can point them out mines ; and our help will 
 
 be wanted 
 
 To inspect, and direct navigation and trade ; 
 Their voyages all will be easily made, 
 With a saving of time, and a saving of cost ; 
 And a seaman in future will never be lost. 
 Hoo. How so ? 
 
 PEIS. We shall warn them : " Now hasten to sail, 
 
 Now keep within harbour ; your voyage will fail." 
 Eu. How readily then will a fortune be made ! 
 I'll purchase a vessel and venture on trade. 
 
 PEIS.* And old treasure concealed will again be revealed ; 
 
 * The want of stability and good faith, both in the Government and 
 individuals, obliged the Greeks to secure their moneyed capital by conceal-
 
 THE BIRDS. 209 
 
 The birds as they know it, will readily show it. 
 Tis a saying of old, " My silver and gold 
 Are so safely secreted, and closely interred, 
 No creature can know it, excepting a bird." 
 
 Eu. I'll part with my vessel, I'll not go aboard; 
 I'll purchase a mattock and dig up a hoard. 
 
 Hoo. We're clear as to wealth; but the blessing of 
 
 health, 
 Is the gift of the gods. 
 
 PEIS. It will make so such odds : 
 
 If they're going on well, they'll be healthy still, 
 And none are in health, that are going on ill. 
 
 Hoo.* But then for longevity ; that is the gift 
 Of the gods. 
 
 PEIS. But the birds can afford them a lift, 
 
 And allow them a century, less or more. 
 
 Hoo. How so ? 
 
 PEIS. From their own individual store : 
 
 They may reckon it fair, to allot them a share ; 
 For old proverbs affirm, that the final term 
 Of a raven's life exceeds the space 
 Of five generations of human race. 
 
 Hoo.f What need have we then for Jove as a king? 
 Surely the birds are a better thing ! 
 
 PEIS. Surely ! surely ! First and most, 
 We shall economize the cost 
 Of marble domes and gilded gates. 
 
 ment. Hence the vast collections of ancient coin which appear in the 
 cabinets of antiquarians. 
 
 Observe the shallow shatter-brained character of Euelpides. 
 
 * The origin of this notion of life being transferable, cannot be accounted 
 for ; in the form of a wish, it appears to have been common. 
 
 t This speech must belong to the Hoopoe. Aristophanes would not 
 leave the result of the scene to be summed up by such a silly fellow as 
 Euelpides. We see besides that Peisthetairus replies to it, He pever 
 replies to Euelpides,
 
 2io THE BIRDS. 
 
 The birds will live at cheaper rates, 
 Lodging, without shame or scorn, 
 In a maple or a thorn ; 
 The most exalted and divine 
 Will have an olive for his shrine. 
 
 We need not run to foreign lands, 
 Or Ammon's temple in the sands ; 
 But perform our easy vows, 
 Among the neighbouring shrubs and boughs ; 
 Paying our oblations fairly, 
 With a pennyworth of barley. 
 
 CHOR.* O best of all envoys, suspected before, 
 Now known and approved, and respected the more 
 To you we resign the political lead, 
 Our worthy director in council and deed. 
 
 Elated with your bold design, 
 
 I swear and vow : 
 If resolutely you combine 
 Your views and interest with mine ; 
 In steadfast councils as a trusty friend, 
 Without deceit, or guile or fraudful end : 
 They that rule in haughty state, 
 The gods ere long shall abdicate 
 
 Their high command ; 
 And yield the sceptre to my rightful hand. 
 
 Then reckon on us for a number and force ; 
 As on you we rely for a ready resource, 
 In council and policy, trusting to you, 
 To direct the design we resolve to pursue. 
 
 * There can be no doubt that this speech belongs to the Chorus, though 
 it may seem difficult to account for what is said of the sceptre, which it 
 should seem ought rather to belong to the king. The Hoopoe in answer 
 alludes to the inveterate vice of all Choruses dawdling and inefficiency.
 
 THE BIRDS. 211 
 
 Hoo. That's well, but we've no time, by Jove, to 
 
 loiter, 
 
 And dawdle and postpone like Nicias.* 
 We should be doing something. First, however, 
 I must invite you to my roosting place, 
 This nest of mine, with its poor twigs and leaves. 
 And tell me what your names are? 
 
 PEIS. Certainly ; 
 
 My name is Peisthetairus.t 
 
 Hoo. And your friend ? 
 
 Eu. Euelpides from Thria. 
 
 Hoo. Well, you're welcome 
 
 Both of ye. 
 
 PEIS. We're obliged. 
 
 Hoo. Walk in together. 
 
 PEIS. Go first then,, if you please. 
 
 Hoo. No, pray move forward. 
 
 PEIS. But bless me stop, pray just for a single 
 
 moment 
 
 Let's see do tell me explain how shall we manage 
 To live with you with a person wearing wings ? 
 Being both of us unfledged ? 
 
 Hoo. Perfectly well ! 
 
 PEIS. Yes, but I must observe, that ^Esop's fables 
 Report a case in point ; the fox and eagle : 
 The fox repented of his fellowship ; 
 And with good cause ; you recollect the story. J 
 
 * The Athenians were at that time disappointed at Nicias's delay, in not 
 advancing immediately against Syracuse. 
 
 f Peisthetairus answers like a man of sense. Euelpides like a simpleton, 
 and we see the effect of it on the king's mind. There is a momentary pause 
 in the invitation, before they are both included in it. 
 
 t Peisthetairus has shown that he is not deficient in valour upon compul- 
 sion. But a character of extreme subtlety is always prone .to suspicion, and 
 the recollection of an example derived from ancient documents in ^Esop's 
 Fables, intimidates him for a moment, and makes him distrustful of the
 
 212 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Hoo. Oh ! don't be alarmed ! we'll give you a certain 
 
 root 
 That immediately promotes the growth of wings. 
 
 PEIS. Come, let's go in then ; Xanthias, do you mind, 
 And Manodorus* follow with the bundles. 
 
 CHOR. Holloh ! 
 
 Hoo. What's the matter ? 
 
 CHOR. Go in with your party, 
 
 And give them a jolly collation and hearty. 
 But the bird, to the Muses and Graces so dear, 
 The lovely sweet nightingale, bid her appear, 
 And leave her amongst us, to sport with us here. 
 
 PEIS. O yes, by Jove, indeed you must indulge them ; f 
 Do, do me the favour, call her from the thicket ! 
 For heaven's sake let me entreat you bring her here, 
 And let us have a sight of her ourselves. 
 
 Hoo.J Since it is your wish and pleasure it must be so; 
 Come here to the strangers, Procne ! show yourself ! 
 
 PEIS. O Jupiter, what a graceful, charming bird ! 
 What a beautiful creature it is ! 
 
 Eu. I'll tell you what ; 
 
 I could find in my heart to rumple her feathers. 
 
 PEIS. And what an attire she wears, all bright with 
 gold I 
 
 frank invitation o> the king. He is then very much ashamed of himself, 
 and, like Bacchus and Master Slender, begins giving orders to his servants, 
 and is importunate and hurried and absurd. Tims the poet, who wanted 
 some lines of strong importunity to mark the entrance of his favourite 
 musician, has contrived to give them to his principal personage, and at the 
 same time to mark his character itself more distinctly, by this momentary 
 failure of his habitual self-possession, originating in the apprehension of 
 having lowered himself in the estimation of his host. 
 
 * These slaves do not appear elsewhere in the play ; it might be doubted 
 whether they appear here and whether Peisthctairus does not call for them 
 in mere nervous absence of mind. 
 
 f With a hurried, nervous eagerness. 
 
 J With grave good breeding, implying a kind of rebuke to the fussy im- 
 portunity into which Peisthctairus had fallen.
 
 THE GIRDS. 213 
 
 Eu. Well, I should like to kiss her, for my part. 
 
 PEIS. You blockhead, with that beak, she'd run you 
 
 through. 
 
 Eu. By Jove, then, one must treat her like an egg; 
 Just clear away the shell and kiss her thus. 
 Hoo.* Let's go ! 
 
 PEIS. Go first then, and good luck go with us. 
 
 [Exeunt. 
 
 The actors having left the stage, the Parabasis ought to follow. It is 
 here prefaced in a singular way by a complimentary song from the 
 Chorus, addressed to the favourite female musician. 
 
 CHOR. O lovely, sweet companion meet, 
 
 From morn to night my sole delight, 
 My little, happy, gentle mate, 
 You come, you come, O lucky fate, 
 Returning here with new delight,! 
 To charm the sight, to charm the sight, 
 
 And charm the ear. 
 Come then anew combine 
 Your notes in harmony with mine, 
 And with a tone beyond compare 
 Begin your anapaestic air. 
 
 The sudden passion for science among the Athenians, and the ridicule 
 of it among the comic poets, has been already noticed. 
 
 Much might be said on the subject of the most splendid passage of the 
 Parabasis, and of the philosophic system of which it presents the 
 traces: but this would lead to considerations veiy remote from the 
 imitation of actual life, and manners and character ; which, as con- 
 stituting the most singular excellence of the author, it has been the 
 object of the translator to illustrate. 
 
 Of the Parabasis before us, the merits are well known, and perhaps no 
 passage in Aristophanes has been oftener quoted with admiration. 
 
 * Gravely disapproving the liberties which are taken in his presence. 
 t See what is said in the Preface. She had been engaged for this per- 
 formance, and was newly arrived.
 
 214 THE 
 
 To bring the most sublime subjects within the verge of Comedy, and 
 to trent of them with humour and fancy, without falling into vulgarity 
 or offending the principles of good taste, seems a task which no poet 
 whom we know of, could have accomplished : though, if we were 
 possessed of the works of Epicharmus, it is possible that we might 
 see other specimens of the same style. 
 
 Ye Children of Man ! whose life is a span, 
 
 Protracted with sorrow from day to day, 
 
 Naked and featherless, feeble and querulous, 
 
 Sickly, calamitous, creatures of clay ! 
 
 Attend to the words of the Sovereign Birds, 
 
 (Immortal, illustrious, lords of the air) 
 
 Who survey from on high, with a merciful eye, 
 
 Your struggles of misery, labour, and care. 
 
 Whence you may learn and clearly discern 
 
 Such truths as attract your inquisitive turn; 
 
 Which is busied of late, with a mighty debate, 
 
 A profound speculation about the creation, 
 
 And organical life, and chaotical strife, 
 
 With various notions of heavenly motions, 
 
 And rivers and oceans, and valleys and mountains, 
 
 And sources of fountains, and meteors on high, 
 
 And stars in the sky. We propose by-and-by 
 
 (If you'll listen and hear) to make it all clear. 
 
 And Prodicus henceforth shall pass for a dunce, 
 
 When his doubts are explained and expounded at once. 
 
 Before the creation of yther and Light, 
 Chaos and Night together were plight, 
 In the dungeon of Erebus foully bedight. 
 Nor Ocean, or Air, or substance was there, 
 Or solid or rare, or figure or form, 
 But horrible Tartarus ruled in the storm : 
 
 At length, in the dreary chaotical closet 
 Of Erebus old, was a privy deposit,
 
 THE BIRDS. 
 
 By Night the primaeval in secrecy laid ; 
 
 A Mystical Egg, that in silence and shade 
 
 Was brooded and hatched ; till time came about : 
 
 And Love, the delightful, in glory flew out, 
 
 In rapture and light, exulting and bright, 
 
 Sparkling and florid, with stars in his forehead, 
 
 His forehead and hair, and a flutter and flare, 
 
 As he rose in the air, triumphantly furnished 
 
 To range his dominions, on glittering pinions, 
 
 All golden and azure, and blooming and burnished : 
 
 He soon, in the murky Tartarean recesses, 
 With a hurricane's might, in his fiery caresses 
 Impregnated Chaos ; and hastily snatched 
 To being and life, begotten and hatched, 
 The primitive Birds : but the Deities all, 
 The celestial Lights, the terrestrial Ball, 
 Were later of birth, with the dwellers on earth, 
 More tamely combined, of a temperate kind; 
 When chaotical mixture approached to a fixture. 
 
 Our antiquity proved ; it remains to be shown, 
 That Love is our author, and master alone, 
 Like him, we can ramble, and gambol and fly 
 O'er ocean and earth, and aloft to the sky : 
 And all the world over we're friends to the lover, 
 And when other means fail, we are found to prevail, 
 When a peacock or pheasant is sent as a present. 
 
 All lessons of primary daily concern, 
 You have learnt from the Birds, and continue to learn, 
 Your best benefactors and early instructors; 
 We give you the warning of seasons returning. 
 
 When the cranes are arranged, and muster afloat 
 In the middle air, with a creaking note, 
 Steering away to the Lybian sands ; 
 Then careful farmers sow their lands ; 
 The crazy vessel is hauled ashore, 
 
 215
 
 216 THE BIRDS. 
 
 The sail, the ropes, the rudder and oar 
 Are all unshipped, and housed in store. 
 
 The shepherd is warned, by the kite reappearing, 
 To muster his flock, and be ready for shearing. 
 
 You quit your old cloak, at the swallow's behest, 
 In assurance of summer, and purchase a vest. 
 
 For Delphi, for Ammon, Dodona, in fine, 
 For every oracular temple and shrine, 
 The Birds are a substitute equal and fair, 
 For on us you depend, and to us you repair 
 For counsel and aid, when a marriage is made, 
 A purchase, a bargain, a venture in trade : 
 Unlucky or lucky, whatever has struck ye, 
 An ox or an ass, that may happen to pass, 
 A voice in the street, or a slave that you meet, 
 A name or a word by chance overheard, 
 If you deem it an omen, you call it a Bird ; 
 And if birds are your omens, it clearly will follow, 
 That birds are a proper prophetic Apollo. 
 
 Then take us as gods, and you'll soon find the odds,* 
 We'll serve for all uses, as Prophets and Muses ; 
 We'll give ye fine weather, we'll live here together ; 
 We'll not keep away, scornful and proud, a top of a 
 
 cloud, 
 
 (In Jupiter's way) ; but attend every day, 
 To prosper and bless, all you possess, 
 And all your affairs, for yourselves and your heirs. 
 And as long as you live, we shall give 
 You wealth and health, and pleasure and treasure, 
 In ample measure ; 
 
 The series of short lines at the end of a Parabasis was to be repeated 
 with the utmost volubility and rapidity as if in a single breath. A comjc 
 effect is sometimes produced in this way on our own stage.
 
 THE BIRDS. 217 
 
 And never bilk you of pigeon's milk, 
 Or potable gold ; you shall live to grow old, 
 In laughter and mirth, on the face of the earth, 
 Laughing, quaffing, carousing, bousing, 
 
 Your only distress, shall be the excess 
 
 Of ease and abundance and happiness. 
 
 SEMICHORUS. 
 
 We see here a comic imitation of the tragic choruses of Phrynichus, a 
 poet older than ^Eschylus, of whom Aristophanes always speaks with 
 respect, as an improver of music and poetry arts which in the 
 judgment of the ancients were deemed inseparable ; or if disjoined, 
 es-entially defective and imperfect. 
 
 Muse, that in the deep recesses 
 
 Of the forest's dreary shade, 
 Vocal with our wild addresses ; 
 
 Or in the lonely lowly glade, 
 Attending near, art pleased to hear, 
 
 Our humble bill tuneful and shrill. 
 
 When, to the name of omnipotent Pan, 
 
 Our notes we raise, or sing in praise, 
 Of mighty Cybele, from whom we began ; 
 
 Mother of Nature, and every creature, 
 Winged or unwinged, of birds or man. 
 
 Aid and attend, and chant with me 
 The music of Phrynichus, open and plain, 
 
 The first that attempted a loftier strain, 
 Ever busy like the bee, with the sweets of harmony. 
 
 EPIRREMA. 
 
 Is there any person present sitting a spectator here, 
 
 Who desires to pass his time, freely without restraint or fear? 
 
 Should he wish f> colonize ; he never need be checked or 
 
 chid, 
 For the trifling indiscretions, which the testy laws forbid.
 
 2i8 THE BIRDS. 
 
 t 
 
 Parricides are in esteem : among the birds we deem it 
 fair, 
 
 A combat honourably fought betwixt a game-cock and his 
 heir! 
 
 There the branded runagate, branded and mottled in the 
 face, 
 
 Will be deemed a motley bird ; a motley mark is no dis- 
 grace. 
 
 Spintharus, the Phrygian born, will pass a muster there 
 with ease, 
 
 Counted as a Phrygian fowl ; and even Execestides,* 
 
 Once a Carian and a slave, may there be nobly born and 
 free ; 
 
 Plume himself on his descent, and hatch a proper pedigree. 
 
 SEMICHORUS. 
 
 This second sample of the style of Phrynichus may serve to give us a 
 more distinct idea of it. It seems to have been one of essential 
 grandeur and harmony, but trespassing occasionally into the regions 
 of nonsense. 
 
 Thus the swans in chorus follow, 
 
 On the mighty Thracian stream, 
 
 Hymning their eternal theme. 
 Praise to Bacchus and Apollo : 
 
 The welkin rings, with sounding wings, 
 With songs and cries and melodies ; 
 Up to the thunderous ^ther ascending : 
 
 Whilst all that breathe, on earth beneath, 
 The beasts of the wood, the plain and the flood, 
 In panic amazement are crouching and bending ; 
 
 Already noted as a foreigner in the first scene of this play.
 
 THE BIRDS. 219 
 
 With the awful qualm, of a sudden calm, 
 Ocean and air in silence blending. 
 The ridge of Olympus is sounding on high, 
 Appalling with wonder the lords of the sky, 
 
 And the Muses and Graces 
 
 Enthroned in their places, 
 Join in the solemn symphony. 
 
 ANTEPIRREMA. 
 
 Nothing can be more delightful than the having wings to 
 
 wear ! 
 
 A spectator sitting here, accommodated with a pair, 
 Might for instance (if he found a tragic chorus dull and 
 
 heavy) 
 Take his flight, and dine at home ; and if he did not choose 
 
 to leave ye, 
 Might return in better humour, when the weary drawl was 
 
 ended. 
 Introduce then wings in use believe me, matters will be 
 
 mended : 
 Patroclides* would not need to sit there, and befoul his 
 
 seat; 
 Flying off he might return, eased in a moment, clean and 
 
 neat. 
 Trust me wings are all in all ! Diitrephes has mounted 
 
 quicker 
 Than the rest of our aspirants, soaring on his wings of 
 
 wicker : 
 
 * The posthumous celebrity of Fatroclides is not confined to this single 
 event. He survived the accident many years, and was the author of a very 
 salutary decree upon the principles advocated by the poet in the Epirrema 
 of - The Frogs," but (as in the instance before us) he was again fatally too 
 late. The decree was not passed till after the destruction of the navy at 
 .rTvjos Potainos.
 
 220 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Basket work, and crates, and hampers, first enabled him to 
 fly;* 
 
 First a captain, then promoted to command the cavalry j 
 With his fortunes daily rising, office and preferment new, 
 An illustrious, enterprising, airy, gallant cockatoo. 
 
 The exclusive functions of the Choius being now at an end, the persons 
 of the drama appear again upon the stage ; Peisthetairus and Euel- 
 pides, having been both in the meanwhile equipped with a sumptuous 
 pair of wings. They are supposed to have been entertained behind 
 the scenes, with a royal collation in the palace of the Hoopoe. 
 Feisthetairus is accordingly in extreme good-humour, and being now 
 in the height of his advancement, recollects that it will be right to 
 behave to his former comrade with the hearty familiarity of an old 
 acquaintance ; he accordingly begins, with a ludicrous similet on his 
 appearance (a species of raillery common among the Athenians, but 
 which was considered as the lowest species of jocularity). He takes 
 his friend's retort in perfect good-humour, and Euelpides is admitted 
 as a third person, to consult, with him and the king, upon some un - 
 important matters such as the name of the new city, and the choice 
 of a patron Deity upon all which topics, his idle buffoonish humour 
 is not misplaced : but a more delicate point is afterwards brought 
 into discussion (nothing less than the choice of a chief commander 
 for the citadel) which Euelpides treats with the same silly drollery 
 as before. Peisthetairus is irritated, or pretends to be so, and dis- 
 misses him in a tone of authority, which the other resents, and 
 appears on the point of mutinying; upon which Peisthetairus smooths 
 him down again, as briefly as possible, and having accomplished 
 this point, immediately turns away from him, to call a servant. 1 
 
 PEIS. Well, there it is ! Such a comical set out, 
 By Jove, I never saw! 
 
 Eu. Why, what's the matter? 
 
 What are you laughing at? 
 
 * His property consisted in a manufactory of this kind, by which he had 
 grown rich. 
 
 t This is the sort of raillery which Bacchus prohibits in the contest 
 between Euripides and ^Eschylus, and of which we have a specimen in " The 
 Wasps," v. 1308. Some modern traveller has told us that abusive similes in 
 alternate extempore verse, serve for an amusement, at this day, to the 
 boatmen of the Nile.
 
 THE BIRDS. 221 
 
 PEIS. At your pen feathers : 
 
 I'll tell ye exactly now, the thing you're like ; 
 You're just the perfect image of a goose, 
 Drawn with a. pen in a writing master's flourish. 
 
 Eu. And you're like a plucked blackbird to a tittle. 
 
 PEIS. Well then, according to the line in ^Eschylus, 
 " It's our own fault, the feathers are our own." * 
 
 Eu. Come, what's to be done. 
 
 Hoo. First, we must choose a 
 
 name, 
 
 Some grand sonorous name, for our new city : 
 Then we must sacrifice. 
 
 Eu. I think so too. 
 
 PEIS. Let's see let's think of a name what shall 
 
 it be? 
 
 What say ye, to the Lacedaemonian name ? 
 Sparta sounds well suppose we call it Sparta. 
 
 Eu. Sparta ! What Spartol f Rushes ! no, not I, 
 I'd not put up with Sparto for a mattress, 
 Much less for a city we're not come to that. 
 
 PEIS. Come then, what name shall it be ? 
 
 Eu. Something appropriate, 
 
 Something that sounds majestic, striking and grand, 
 Alluding to the clouds and the upper regions. 
 
 PEIS. What think ye of clouds and cuckoos ? Cuckoo- 
 
 cloudlands 
 Or Nephelococcugia ? 
 
 Hoo. That will do ; 
 
 A truly noble and sonorous name 
 
 Eu. I wonder, if that Nephelococcugia, 
 Is the same place I've heard of : people tell me, 
 
 * ^Eschylus alludes to a fable in which an eagle complains of being 
 wounded by an arrow feathered from his own wings. 
 
 t Sparto still retains its name, and is still used for mattresses and 
 occasionally for cordage.
 
 222 THE BIRDS. 
 
 That all Theagenes's rich possessions 
 Lie there ; and ^Eschines's whole estate. 
 
 PEIS. Yes ! * and a better country it is by far, 
 Than all that land in Thrace, the fabulous plain 
 Of Phlegra ; where those earthborn landed giants 
 Were bullied and out-vapoured by the gods. 
 
 Eu. It will be a genteelish, smart concern, I reckon, 
 This city of ours .... Which of the deities 
 Shall we have for a patron ? We must weave our mantle, 
 Our sacred mantle of course . ... the yearly mantle f 
 To one or other of 'em. 
 
 PEIS. Well, Minerva? 
 
 Why should not we have Minerva ? she's established, 
 Let her continue ; she'll do mighty well. 
 
 Eu. No there I object ; for a well-ordered city, 
 The example would be scandalous ; to see 
 The goddess, a female born, in complete armour 
 From head to foot ; and Cleisthenes J with a distaff. 
 
 PEIS. What warden will ye appoint for the Eagle tower, 
 Your citadel, the fort upon the rock ? 
 
 Hoo. That charge will rest with a chief of our own 
 
 choice, 
 
 Of Persian race, a chicken of the game, 
 An eminent warrior. 
 
 Eu. Oh my chicky-hiddy 
 
 My little master. I should like to see him, 
 Strutting about and roosting on the rock. 
 
 * Many Athenians (as Miltiades, Alcibiades, and Thucydides the his- 
 torian) were proprietors of large estates in the Chersonese and along tiie 
 coasts of Thrace : Theagenes, it seems, and ,/Eschines, boasting of wealth 
 which they did not possess, chose to talk of their estates in Thrace. In the 
 last century the West Indies was the usual locality assigned to fabulous 
 estates. Thrace was also mythologically fiikuluus, as the field of battle 
 between Jupiter and the Titans. 
 
 f See "Knights," p. 129, note. 
 
 J Ridiculed for his effeminacy in various comedies.
 
 THE BIRDS. 223 
 
 PEIS. Come, you now ! please to step to the atmosphere ; 
 And give a look to the work, and help the workmen ; 
 And between whiles fetch brick and tiles, and such like ; 
 Draw water, stamp the mortar do it barefoot; 
 Climb up the ladders ; tumble down again : 
 Keep constant watch and ward ; conceal your watch lights ; 
 Then go the rounds, and give the countersign, 
 Till you fall fast asleep. Send heralds off, 
 A brace of them one to the gods above ; 
 And another, down below there, to mankind. 
 Bid them, when they return, inquire for me. 
 
 Eu. For me ! for me ! You may be hanged for me. 
 
 PEIS. Come, friend, go where I bid you : never mind ; 
 The business can't go on without you, anyhow. 
 It's just a sacrifice to these new deities, 
 That I must wait for ; and the priest that's coming. 
 Holloh, you boy there ! bring the basin and ewer ! 
 
 In the passage which follows the author ridicules the rage for vulgar 
 realities (a corruption of the theatric art, essentially destructive of all 
 illusion, as we have witnessed at home, with real water, real horses, 
 real elephants). The stage of Athens it should seem had been 
 degraded by a real sacrifice, the paltriness of such a spectacle is 
 marked by the magnificent exhortation of the Chorus, contrasted with 
 the meanness of the execution which they anticipate. 
 
 CHOR. We urge, we exhort you, and advise, 
 To ordain a mighty sacrifice ; 
 And before the gods to bring 
 A stupendous offering; 
 Either a sheep or some such thing ! 
 To please the critics of the age, 
 Sacrificed upon the stage. 
 Sound amain the Pythian strain ! 
 Let Choeris* be brought here to sing. 
 
 * Choeris, a bad musician (the constant butt of the comic poets), is called 
 for, to complete the shabbiness of the performance. His representative, the/
 
 224 ?H BIRDS. 
 
 PEIS. Have done there with your puffing .... heaven 
 
 and earth, 
 
 What's here ! I've seen a many curious things, 
 But never saw the like of this before, 
 
 A crow with a flute and a mouthpiece. Priest, your office : 
 Perform it ! Sacrifice to the new deities ! 
 
 PRI. I will but where's the boy gone with the 
 basket ? 
 
 Let us pray to the holy flame, 
 And the holy hawk that guards the same ; 
 To the sovereign deities, 
 All and each, of all degrees, 
 
 Female and male ! 
 
 CHOR. Hail, thou hawk of Sunium, hail ! 
 PRI. To the Delian and the Pythian swan, 
 And to the Latonian quail, 
 
 All hail ! 
 CHO:*. To the bird of awful stature, 
 
 Mother of gods, mother of man ; 
 Great Cybele ! nurse of Nature ! 
 Glorious ostrich, hear our cry ! 
 Fearful and enormous creature, 
 Hugest of all things that fly, 
 O preserve and prosper us, 
 Thou mother of Cleocritus ! * 
 Grant the blessings that we seek, 
 For us, and for the Chians' eke ! 
 
 PEIS. That's right, the Chians don't forget the Chians ! 
 PRI. To the heroes, birds, and heroes' sons, 
 We call at once, we call and cry, 
 To the woodpecker, the jay, the pie, 
 
 crow (who is the Chceris among the birds), sounds some discordant notes 
 till Peisthetairus stops him. 
 
 * Of Cleocritus nothing is known, except that he was unfortunate in his 
 figure, which was thought to resemble that of an ostrich.
 
 THE BIRDS. 22$ 
 
 To the mallard and the wigeon, 
 To the ringdove and the pigeon, 
 To the petrel and sea-mew, 
 To the dottrel and curlew, 
 To the vultures and the hawks, 
 To the cormorants and storks, 
 To the rail, to the quail, 
 To the peewit, to the tomtit, 
 
 Peisthetaini?, who can do everything better than everybody else, under- 
 takes to perform the sacrifice. This is sufficiently in character. By 
 making him the chief operator, a greater comic effect is given to the 
 series of interruptions which disturb him ; until in despair he deter- 
 mines to transfer the sacrifice elsewhere. In this way the poet 
 avoids the vulgar reality which he had before ridiculed. 
 
 PEIS. Have done there ! call no more of 'em ; are you mad? 
 Inviting all the cormorants and vultures, 
 For a victim such as this ! Why don't you see, 
 A kite at a single swoop, would carry it off? 
 Get out of my way there with your crowns and fillets, 
 I'll do it myself! I'll make the sacrifice ! 
 
 PRI. Then must I commence again, 
 In a simple, humble strain ; 
 And invite the gods anew, 
 To visit us but very few 
 Or only just a single one, 
 
 All alone, 
 
 In a quiet, easy way ; 
 Wishing you may find enough,* 
 If you dine with us to day. 
 
 Our victim is so poor and thin, 
 Merely bones, in fact, and skin. 
 PEIS. We sacrifice and pray to the winged deities. 
 
 * Ridicule of the vulgar reality, the poor half-starved sheep being standing 
 on the stage. 
 
 H
 
 226 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Enter a Poet, very ragged and shabby, with a very mellifluous submissive 
 mendicatory demeanour. Peisthetaims, the essential man of business 
 and activity, entertaining a supreme contempt for his profession and 
 person, is at no great pains to conceal it ; but recollecting at the 
 same time, that it is advisable to secure the suffrages of the literary 
 world, and that the character of a patron is creditable to a great 
 man, he patronizes him accordingly, not at his own expense, but by 
 bestowing upon him certnin articles of apparel put in requisition for 
 that purpose. This first act of confiscation is directed against the 
 property of the Church ; the Scholiast informs us, that he begins by 
 stripping the Priest. 
 
 POET. " For the festive, happy day, 
 Muse prepare an early lay, 
 To Nephclococcugia." 
 PEIS. What's here to do ? What are you ? Where do 
 
 you come from ? 
 
 POET. An humble menial of the Muses' train, 
 As Homer expresses it. 
 
 PEIS. A menial, are you ? 
 
 With your long hair ? * A menial ? 
 
 POET. Tis not that, 
 
 No 1 but professors of the poetical art, 
 Are simply styled, the " Menials of the Muses," 
 As Homer expresses it. 
 
 PEIS. Aye, the Muse has given you 
 
 A ragged livery. Well, but friend, I say 
 Friend ! Poet ! What the plague has brought you 
 
 here? 
 
 POET. I've made an ode upon your new built city, 
 And a charming composition for a chorus, 
 And another, in Simonides's manner. 
 
 PEIS.| When were they made ? What time ? How long 
 ago? 
 
 * Slaves were forbidden to wear long hair, 
 t In a sharp, cross, examining tone.
 
 THE BIRDS. 227 
 
 POET. From early date, I celebrate in song, 
 The noble Nephelococcugian State. 
 
 PEIS. That's strange, when I'm just sacrificing here, 
 For the first time, to give the town a name. 
 POET. Intimations, swift as air, 
 
 To the Muses' ear, are carried, 
 Swifter than the speed and force, 
 Of the fiery-footed horse, 
 
 Hence, the tidings never tarried; 
 Father, patron, mighty lord,* 
 Founder of the rising State, 
 What thy bounty can afford, 
 
 Be it Kttle, be it great, 
 With a quick resolve, incline 
 To bestow on me and mine. 
 
 PEIS. This fellow will breed a bustle, and make mischief, 
 If we don't give him a trifle, and get rid of him. 
 You there, you've a spare waistcoat ; pull it off ! 
 And give it this same clever, ingenious poet 
 There, take the waistcoat, friend ! Ye seem to want it ! 
 POET. Freely, with a thankful heart, 
 
 What a bounteous hand bestows, 
 Is received in friendly part ; 
 
 But amid the Thracian snows, 
 Or the chilly Scythian plain, 
 
 He the wanderer, cold and lonely, 
 With an under-waistcoat only, 
 Must a further wish retain ; 
 
 Which, the Muse averse to mention, 
 To your gentle comprehension, 
 Trusts her enigmatic strain. 
 
 * The Scholiast informs us that these lines are in ridicule of certain 
 tnendicatory passages in the Odes of Pindar ; one in particular, addressed 
 to Hiero on the foundation of a new city. 
 
 H 2
 
 228 THE BIRDS. 
 
 PEIS. I comprehend it enough ; you want a jerkin ; 
 Here, give him yours ; one ought to encourage genius. 
 There, take it, and good-by to ye ! 
 
 POET.* Well, I'm going ; 
 
 And as soon as I get to the town, I'll set to work ; 
 And finish something, in this kind of way. 
 
 " Seated on your golden throne, 
 Muse, prepare a solemn ditty, 
 To the mighty, 
 To the nighty, 
 
 To the cloudy, quivering, shivering, 
 To the lofty-seated city." 
 
 PEIS. Well, I should have thought, that jerkin might have 
 
 cured him 
 
 Of his " quiverings and shiverings." How the plague ! 
 Did the fellow find us out ? I should not have thought it. 
 
 Come, once again, go round with the basin and ewer. 
 Peace ! Silence ! Silence ! 
 
 Enter a Soothsayer with a great air of arrogance and self-importance. 
 He comes on the authority of a book of Oracles (which he pretends 
 to possess, but which he never produces), in virtue of which he lays 
 claim to certain sacrificial perquisites and fees. Peisthetairus en- 
 counters him with a different version composed upon the spot ; in 
 virtue of which he dismisses the Soothsayer with a good lashing. 
 
 SOOTH. Stop the sacrifice ! 
 
 PEIS. What are you ? 
 
 SOOTH. A Soothsayer, that's what I am. 
 
 PEIS. The worse luck for ye. 
 
 SOOTH. Friend, are you in your senses ? f 
 
 Don't trifle absurdly with religious matters. 
 
 * The Poet withdraws, gradually turning round and reciting. Peisth. 
 does not appear to take notice, but watches till he is fairly gone. 
 
 t Seep. 154 of "The Knights," where there is the same allusion to 
 disputes on the authentic copies of oracles.
 
 THE BIRDS. 229 
 
 Here's a prophecy of Balds, which expressly 
 Alludes to Nephelococcugia. 
 
 PEIS. How came it, then, you never prophesied 
 Your prophecies before the town was built ? 
 SOOTH. The spirit withheld me. 
 
 PEIS. And is it allowable now, 
 
 To give us a communication of them ? 
 
 SOOTH. Hem I 
 
 " Moreover, when the crows and daws unite, 
 To build and settle, in the midway right, 
 Between tall Corinth and fair Sicyon's height, 
 Then to Pandora, let a milk white goat 
 Be slain, and offered, and a comely coat 
 Given to the Soothsayer, and shoes a pair ; 
 When he to you this Oracle shall bear." 
 PEIS. Are the shoes mentioned ? 
 
 SOOTH, [pretending to feel for his papers]. Look at the 
 book, and see ! 
 
 " And let him have the entrails for his share." 
 PEIS. Are the entrails mentioned ? 
 SOOTH, [as before]. Look at the book, and see ! 
 
 " I ; f you, predestined youth, shall do these things, 
 Then you shall soar aloft, on eagle's wings ; 
 But, if you do not, you shall never be 
 An eagle, nor a hawk, nor bird of high degree." 
 PEIS. Is all this, there ? 
 
 SOOTH, [as bcfore\. Look at the book, and see ! 
 PEIS. This Oracle differs most remarkably, 
 From that which I transcribed in Apollo's temple. 
 " If at the sacrifice .... * which you prepare, 
 An uninvited vagabond .... should dare 
 
 * The breaks in the text .... may serve to indicate what was more 
 distinctly expressed by the actor viz., that Peisthetairus's Oracle is an 
 extempore production.
 
 230 THE BIRDS. 
 
 To interrupt you, and demand a share, 
 
 Let cuffs and buffets .... be the varlet's lot. 
 
 Smite him between the ribs .... and spare him 
 
 not." 
 
 SOOTH. Nonsense, you're talking ! 
 
 PEIS. [with the same action as the SOOTHSAYER, as if he 
 were feeling for papers}. Look at the book, and see ! 
 " Thou shalt in no wise heed them, or forbear 
 To lash and smite those eagles of the air, 
 Neither regard their names, for it is written, 
 Lampon and Diopithes shall be smitten." 
 SOOTH. Is all this, there ? 
 PEIS. [producing a horsewhip]. Look at the book, and 
 
 see! 
 Get out ! with a plague and a vengeance. 
 
 SOOTH. Oh dear ! oh ! 
 
 PEIS. Go soothsay somewhere else, you rascal, run ! 
 
 {Exit SOOTH. 
 
 Meton the Astronomer appears, encumbered with a load of mathematical 
 instruments, which are disposed about his person. He advances 
 with short steps, a straight back, and his chin in the air, modifying, 
 by what he conceives to be a tone of condescending familiarity, a 
 manner of habitual self-importance. 
 
 MET. I'm come, you see, to join you. 
 
 PEIS. [aside], (Another plague !) 
 
 For what ? What's your design ? Your plan, your notion ? 
 Your scheme your apparatus your equipment 
 Your outfit? What's the meaning of it all? 
 
 MET. I mean to take a geometrical plan 
 Of your atmosphere to allot it, and survey it 
 In a scientific form. 
 
 PEIS. In the name of heaven ! 
 
 Who are ye and what? What name? What manner of 
 man?
 
 THE BIRDS. 231 
 
 MET. Who am I and what ! Melon's my name, well 
 
 known 
 In Greece, and in the village of Colonos. 
 
 PEIS. But tell me, pray ; these implements, these articles, 
 What are they meant for?* 
 
 MET. These are Instruments! 
 
 An atmospherical geometrical scale. 
 
 First, you must understand, that the atmosphere 
 Is formed in a manner altogether partly, 
 In the fashion of a furnace, or a funnel ; 
 
 I take this circular arc, with the movable arm, 
 And so, by shifting it round, till it coincides 
 At the angle ; you understand me ? 
 
 PEIS. Not in the least. 
 
 MET I obtain a true division, with the t 4uadrature f 
 
 Of the equilateral circle. Here, I trace 
 Your market-place, in the centre, with the streets 
 Converging inwards ! and the roads, diverging ! 
 From the circular wall, without ! like solar rays 
 From the circular circumference of the sun. 
 
 PEIS. [in a pretended soliloquy ; then calling to him with a 
 
 tone of mystery and alarni\. 
 Another Thales ! absolutely, a Thales ! 
 Meton ! 
 
 MET. \startkd\ Why, what's the matter ? 
 
 PEIS. You're aware, 
 
 That I've a regard for you. Take my advice ; 
 Don't be seen here withdraw yourself abscond ! 
 
 MET. Is there any alarm or risk? 
 
 PEIS. Why, much the same, 
 
 As it might be in Lacedsemon. There's a bustle 
 Of expelling aliens ; people are dragged out 
 
 * Peist. going up to him and pulling them about. 
 
 t Meton with animation and action illustrative of the proposed plan.
 
 232 
 
 THE BIRDS, 
 
 From the inns and lodgings, with a deal of uproar, 
 And blows and abuse in plenty, to be met with 
 In the public street. 
 
 MET. A popular tumult heh? 
 
 PEIS.* Oh, fie! no, nothing of that kind. 
 
 MET. How do you mean then ? 
 
 PEis.f We're carrying into effect a resolution 
 Adopted lately ; to discard and cudgel .... 
 Coxcombs and mountebanks .... of every kind. 
 
 MET. Perhaps .... I had best withdraw. 
 
 PEIS. Why, yes, perhaps .... 
 
 But yet, I would not answer for it, neither ; 
 Perhaps, you may be too late; the blows I mentioned 
 Are coming close upon you there they come ! 
 
 MET. Oh, bless me ! 
 
 PEIS. Did not I tell you, and give you warning ? 
 
 Get out, you coxcomb, find out by your geometry. 
 The road you came, and measure it back : you'd best. 
 
 \Exit METON. 
 
 A Commissioner from Athens advances with an air of importance and 
 ascendency ; like other consequential persons sent on a foreign 
 mission, he wishes it to be understood that he considers it a sort of 
 banishment. 
 
 COM. Is nobody here ? None of the proxeni, 
 To receive and attend upon me ? 
 
 PEIS. What's all this? 
 
 SardanapalusJ in person come amongst us ! 
 
 COM. I come, appointed as Commissioner 
 To Nephelococcugia. 
 
 PEIS. A Commissioner ! 
 
 What brings you here ? 
 
 * Peist. scandalized at the supposition. 
 
 f During this speech Peisthetairus keeps his eye quietly fixed upon the 
 Astronomer. 
 t A name proverbial for pomp and luxury.
 
 THE BIRDS. 233 
 
 COM. A paltry scrap of paper, 
 
 A trifling, silly decree, that sent me away 
 Here to this place of yours. 
 
 PEIS. Well now ! suppose, 
 
 To make things easy on both sides could not you 
 Just take your salary at once ; and so return, 
 Without any further trouble ? 
 
 COM. Truly, yes. 
 
 I've other affairs at home : a speech and a motion, 
 ThatI meant to have made in the general Assembly, 
 About a business, that I took in hand, 
 On the part of my friend Pharnaces, the satrap. 
 
 PEIS. Agreed then, and farewell. Here, take your salary. 
 
 COM. What's here ? 
 
 [PEISTHETAIRUS has held out his left hand, as if 
 with an offer of money ; he grasps the right hand 
 of the COMMISSIONS, and u-ith this advantage 
 proceeds to buffet ///;//.] 
 
 PEIS. A motion on the part of Pharnaces ! 
 
 COM. Bear witness here ! I'm beaten and abused 
 In my character of Commissioner ! \Exit COM. 
 
 PEIS. Get out ! 
 
 With your balloting-box and all. It's quite a shame, 
 Quite scandalous ! They send Commissioners here * 
 Before we've finished our first sacrifice. 
 
 En'.er a Hawker with copies of new laws relating to the colo:iy, which 
 he has brought out with him for sale. Like all itinerant vendors of 
 literature, he is trying to attract purchasers by reciting and bawling 
 out select passages from the papers in his hand. The sale of them is 
 his only object ; and he is quite unconscious that the specimen which, 
 he recites is applicable to an incident which lias just occurred. He 
 
 * Peisthetairus, in expectation of the Commissioner's return, is work- 
 ing himself into a proper state of wrath, in order to be ready for him. Mere 
 gratuitous complaint would not he suitable to his cnaracter._
 
 234 THE BIRDS. 
 
 enters on the opposite side with the monotonous chant of a vendor 
 of a last dying speech, confronting Peisthetairus, who is returning 
 after having driven out the Commissioner. 
 
 HAW. " Moreover, if a Nephelococcugian 
 Should assault or smite an Athenian citizen" .... 
 
 PEIS. What's this? What's all this trumpery paper 
 here? 
 
 HAW. I've brought you the new laws and ordinances, 
 And copies of the last decrees to sell. 
 
 PEIS. [drily and bitterly}. Let's hear 'em. 
 
 HAW. " It is enacted and ordained 
 
 That the Nephelococcugians shall use 
 Such standard weights and measures " . . . . 
 
 PEIS. Friend, you'll find 
 
 Hard measure here, and a heavy weight, I promise you, 
 Upon your shoulders shortly. 
 
 HAW. What's the matter ? 
 
 What's come to you ? 
 
 PEIS. Get out, with your decrees ! 
 
 I've bloody decrees against you, dire decrees. 
 
 [drives him off, 
 
 COM. [returning}. I summon Peisthetairus to his answer, 
 In an action of assault and battery, 
 For the first day of the month, Munichion. 
 
 PEIS. Ha, say you so ? You're there again ! Have at 
 you. [drives him off. 
 
 HAW. [returning], " And in case of any assault or 
 
 violence, 
 Against the person of the Magistrate." .... 
 
 PEIS. Bless me ! What you ! You're there, again. 
 
 [drives him off. 
 
 COM. [returning again}. I'll ruin you ; 
 
 I'll lay my damages at ten thousand drachmas. 
 
 PEIS. In the mean time, I'll smash your balloting- 
 boxes.
 
 THE BIRDS. 
 
 235 
 
 COM. Remember, how you effaced the public monu- 
 ment,* 
 On the pillar, and denied it late last night 
 
 PEIS. Pah! stuff! There seize him, somebody. What 
 
 you're off, too. 
 
 Come, let's remove, and get away from hence, 
 And sacrifice our goat, to the gods within doors. 
 
 It is to be feared that, without having it pointed out to him, the reader 
 will hardly be aware that in some of the following lines an attempt 
 is made to imitate the effect of the spondaic passages in the 
 original. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Henceforth our worth, 
 Our right our might, 
 Shall be shown, 
 Acknowledged, known ; 
 Mankind shall raise 
 Prayers, vows, praise, 
 To the birds alone. 
 Our employ, is to destroy 
 The vermin train, 
 Ravaging amain, 
 Your fruits and grain : 
 We're the wardens 
 Of your gardens, 
 To watch and chase 
 The wicked race, 
 And cut them shorter, 
 In hasty slaughter. 
 
 The first lines of the Epirrema are descriptive of the cruel madness of 
 the times, see note to p. 199. Diagoras was a poet, a foreigner resident 
 
 * The sort of accusations which were current at the time similar to those 
 of the mutilation of the Hermae. Peisthetairus does not take any notice or 
 bestow a whole line upon his accuser ; the last words of the verse are 
 addressed to the Hawker.
 
 236 THE BIRDS. 
 
 at Athens (being suspected of Atheism and consequently of. being 
 an accomplice in the imaginary plot), he was proscribed and a price 
 set upon his head ; it seems also that, in other instances which are 
 alluded to, assassination was encouraged by public rewaids. 
 The history of a similar period. The times of Titus Oates's plot (admir- 
 ably described by Roger North in his Examen) may serve to illus- 
 trate the lines 13 and 14, the community in both instances remaining 
 subject to a reign of terror under obscure wretches whose sole instru- 
 ment of dominion was perjury ; as it was necessary for those sove- 
 reign witnesses to extort respectable subsidiary evidence in support 
 of their main system of perjury, threats and imprisonment were the 
 means employed in both instances, as appears by the narrative of 
 Andocides. 
 
 EPIRREMA. 
 
 At the present urgent crisis, all your efforts and attention 
 Are directed to secure Diagoras's apprehension : 
 Handsome bounties have been offered of a talent for his 
 
 head 
 Likewise, with respect to tyrants (tyrants that are gone 
 
 and dead) 
 
 Bounties of a talent each, for all that can be killed or 
 ,. caught : 
 
 With a zealous emulation, we, the Birds, have also 
 
 thought 
 Just and proper, to proclaim, from this time forth, that we 
 
 withdraw 
 
 From Philocrates, the fowler, the protection of the law: 
 Furthermore, we fix a price, for bringing him alive or dead, 
 Four, if he's secured alive; i single talent for his head: 
 He, that ortolans and quails to market has presumed to 
 
 bring; 
 
 And the sparrows, six a penny, tied together in a string, 
 With a wicked art retaining, sundry doves in his employ, 
 Fastened, with their feet in fetters, forced to serve for a 
 
 decoy ; 
 Farther, we declare and publish our command to men 
 
 below,
 
 THE BIRDS. 237 
 
 All the birds you keep in prison, to release, and let them go. 
 We shall, else, revenge ourselves, and we shall teach the 
 
 tyrants yet, 
 How to chirp and dance in fetters, in the tangles of a 
 
 net. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Blest are they, 
 
 The birds alway, 
 
 With perfect clothing, 
 
 Fearing nothing, 
 Cold or sleet or summer heat. 
 
 As it chances, 
 
 As he fancies, 
 
 Each his own vagary follows, 
 Dwelling in the dells and hollows 
 When, with eager weary strain, 
 The shrilly grasshoppers complain, 
 Parched upon the sultry plain; 
 Maddened with the raging heat, 
 We secure a cool retreat, 
 In the shady nooks and coves, s 
 
 Recesses of the sacred groves, 
 Many a herb, and many a berry 
 Serves to feast, and make us merry. 
 
 ANTEPIRREMA. 
 To the judges of the prize, we wish to mention in a 
 
 word, 
 
 The return we mean to make, if our performance is pre- 
 ferred. 
 First then, in your empty coffers, you shall see the sterling 
 
 owl,* 
 From the mines of Laurium, familiar as a common fowl; 
 
 * The figure of an owl stamped on the coin of Athens,
 
 238 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Roosting among the bags and pouches, each at ease upon 
 
 his nest; 
 
 Undisturbed, rearing and hatching little broods of interest : 
 If you wish to cheat in office, but are inexpert and raw. 
 You should have a kite for agent, capable to gripe and 
 
 claw ; 
 Cranes and cormorants shall help you, to a stomach and a 
 
 throat ; 
 When you feast abroad, but, if you give a vile, unfriendly 
 
 vote, 
 Hasten and provide yourselves, each, with a little silver 
 
 plate, 
 Like the statues of the gods, for the protection of his 
 
 pate; 
 
 Else, when forth abroad you ramble, on a summer holiday, 
 We shall take a dirty vengeance, and befoul your best 
 
 array. 
 
 In the following scene a foot messenger arrives at full speed from the 
 new city, apparently in a state of great exhaustion. He communi- 
 cates his important intelligence to Peisthetairus in a single gasp of 
 breath "Your fortification's finished!" The report which he 
 makes of the building of a new Babylon by the nation of the Birds, as 
 it considerably exceeds even that license of assuming impossibilities 
 which is the privilege of the ancient comedy, may lead us to examine 
 the mode of humorous contrivance by which the author has 
 managed in some degree to maintain that balance between truth and 
 falsehood, which I have (in another place) endeavoured to point out 
 as essential to the character of all dramatic representations whether 
 serious or comic. 
 
 The interest which \ve take in the development of moral truth and in 
 the illustration of human character, is so much stronger than tint 
 which we attach to mere matter of fact, that where the two are com- 
 bined (that is to say, where a supposed fact is made the foundation 
 of a new and striking illustration of character), our attention is, gene- 
 rally speaking, wholly directed to the latter, and we are incline 1 to 
 take the fact for granted ; as we allow the scrawl, which a mathema- 
 tician draws, to stand for a circle or square, our whole a tention 
 being absorbed in the acquisition of a general and a permanent irut'i. 
 It is, we believe, an established axiom in the art of lying that almo t
 
 THE BIRDS. 239 
 
 anything may be made credible of almost any person, provided that 
 ihe imaginary facts are accompanied by a just representation of the 
 behaviour of the person, such as it might be supposed to be under 
 the alleged circumstances ; and this will be more strikingly the case, 
 if some trait of his character, not generally observed, but likely to be 
 immediately recognized, is exhibited for the first time. It has been 
 observed elsewhere, of the Aristophanic or ancient comedy, that it 
 is essentially a grave, humorous, impossible "great lie," related 
 with an accurate mimicry of the language and manners of the 
 persons introduced. As the humour of a "narrative lie" is more 
 easily comprehended than that of a dramatic one, we may venture 
 to examine the drama, such as it would have appeared if it had been 
 helped out in some degree by a narrative comment ; if, like the expla- 
 natory heroic prologue in "Henry the Fifth," the ancient comedy 
 had made use of a buffoonish prologue, explanatory and preparatory 
 to the different scenes. We might suppose Aristophanes or his pro- 
 locutor on this occasion to have said : " Gentlemen, the informa- 
 tion, which I apprehend you will shortly receive of the progress of 
 the new buildings at Nephelococcugia, may perhaps strike you as 
 extraordinary. I should not be surprised, if, to some amongst you, 
 it should appear little short of being absolutely incredible ; but I 
 would not have you rely entirely upon your own judgment. There 
 is Peisthetairus, who has every means of information, and of whose 
 abilities you can have no doubt : you will see him as much astonished 
 as any amongst you ; and you will see him so for the first and only 
 time. But, will he disbelieve the fact? Far from it. Like the 
 judicious amongst yourselves, he will not entertain the least doubt of 
 it ; on the contrary, unless I am very much mistaken in his character, 
 you will be able to detect evident symptoms of jealousy and uneasi- 
 ness at the idea of such an object having been accomplished, inde- 
 pendently of his direction and superintendence ; and indeed, not 
 without reason ; for, you will see, that both the Chorus and the 
 Messenger himself appear to abate something of their accustomed 
 respect and deference to him. You will observe likewise, that the 
 Messenger is far from anticipating the slightest incredulity, as to the 
 general fact of the completion of the work of which he himself has 
 been a witness ; while he is apparently very anxious in his negative 
 testimony, as to the total absence of any extraneous aid or assistance 
 whatever. " 
 
 PEISTHETAIRUS. 
 
 Well, friends and birds I the sacrifice has succeeded, 
 Our omens have been good ones : good and fair.
 
 240 THE BIRDS. 
 
 But, what's the meaning of it ? We've no ne\vs 
 From the new building yet ! No messenger ! 
 Oh ! there, at last, I see there's somebody 
 Running at speed, and panting like a racer. 
 
 [Enter a Messenger , quite out of breath ; and 
 speaking in short snatches .] 
 
 MESS. Where is he ? Where ? Where is he ? Where ? 
 
 Where is he ? 
 The president Peisthetairus ? 
 
 PEIS. [coolly]. Here am I. 
 
 MESS, [in a gasp of brcath\ Your fortification's 
 finished. 
 
 PEIS. Well ! that's well. 
 
 MESS. A most amazing, astonishing work it is ! 
 So, that Theagenes and Proxenides * 
 Might flourish and gasconade and prance away, 
 Quite at their ease, both of them four-in-hand, 
 Driving abreast upon the breadth of the wall, 
 Each in his own new chariot. 
 
 PEIS. You surprise me. 
 
 MESS. And the height (for I made the measurement 
 
 myself) 
 Is exactly a hundred fathoms. 
 
 PEIS. Heaven and earth ! 
 
 How could it be ? such a mass ! who could have built it ? 
 
 MESS. The Birds ; no creature else, no foreigners, 
 Egyptian bricklayers,! workmen or masons, 
 But, they themselves, alone, by their own efforts, 
 (Even to my surprise, as an eye-witness) 
 The Birds, I say, completed everything: 
 
 Pretenders to great \\caltli and affecting extraordinary expense and 
 display. See note to p. 222. 
 f Egyptian labourers are mentioned in "The Frogs." \
 
 THE BIRDS. 241 
 
 There came a body of thirty thousand cranes 
 (I won't be positive, there might be more) 
 With stones from Africa, in their craws and gizzards, 
 Which the stone-curlews and stone-chatterers 
 Worked into shape and finished. The sand-martens 
 And mud-larks, too, were busy in their department, 
 Mixing the mortar, while the water birds, 
 As fast as it was wanted, brought the water 
 To temper, and work it. 
 
 PEIS. [in a fidget]. But, who served the masons? 
 Who did you get to carry it ? 
 
 MESS. To carry it ? 
 
 Of course, the carrion crows and carrying pigeons. 
 
 PEIS. [in a fuss, which he endeavours to conceal}. 
 Yes ! yes ! But after all, to load your hods, 
 How did you manage that ? 
 
 MESS. Oh capitally, 
 
 I promise you. There were the geese, all barefoot 
 Trampling the mortar, and, when all was ready, 
 They handed it into the hods, so cleverly, 
 With their flat feet ! 
 PEIS. [A bad joke, as a vent for irritation *]. 
 
 They footed it, you mean 
 Come ; it was handily done though, I confess. 
 
 MESS. Indeed, I assure you, it was a sight to see them ; 
 And trains of ducks, there were, clambering the ladders, 
 With their duck legs, like bricklayer's 'prentices, 
 All dapper and handy, with their little trowel?. 
 
 PEIS.| In fact, then, it's no use engaging foreigners, 
 Mere folly and waste, we've all within ourselves. 
 
 * Like FalstafF, when he is annoyed and perplexed, joking perforce. 
 
 f Peisthetairus is at a loss, unable to think of a new objection, he 
 maintains his importance by a wise observation. As soon as an objection 
 occurs, he states it with great e.agerness ; but with no better success than 
 before.
 
 2 42 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Ah, well now, come ! But about the woodwork ? Heh ! 
 Who were the carpenters ? Answer me that ! 
 
 MESS. The woodpeckers, of course: and there they 
 
 were, 
 
 Labouring upon the gates, driving and banging, 
 With their hard hatchet beaks, and such a din, 
 Such a clatter, as they made, hammering and hacking, 
 In a perpetual peal, pelting away 
 Like shipwrights, hard at work in the arsenal. 
 
 And now their work is finished, gates and all, 
 Staples and bolts, and bars and everything ; 
 The sentries at their posts ; patrols appointed ; 
 The watchmen in the barbican ; the beacons 
 Ready prepared for lighting ; all their signals 
 Arranged but I'll step out, just for a moment, 
 To wash my hands. You'll settle all the rest. {Exit. 
 
 [PEISTHETAIRUS, surprised at the rapid conclusion 
 of ike work, feeling from the volubility and 
 easy manner of the Messenger, the blow which 
 his authority has received ; seeing tJiat nothing 
 is left for him to superintend, nothing to direct, 
 nothing to suggest, or to find fault icit/i, remains 
 in an attitude of perplexity and astonishment, 
 with his hands clasped across his forehead.] 
 CHOR. [to PEISTHETAIRUS, in a sort of self-satisfied 
 
 drawling tone\. 
 
 Heigh-day ! Why, what's the matter with ye ? Sure ! 
 Ah ! well now, I calculate, you're quite astonished ; 
 You did not know the nature of our birds : 
 I guess you thought it an impossible thing, 
 To finish up your fortification job 
 Within the time so cleverly. 
 
 PEIS. \recovering himself and looking round\ Yes, truly. 
 Yes, I'm surprised indeed ; I must confess
 
 THE niRDS. 243 
 
 I could almost imagine to myself 
 It was a dream, an illusion, altogether 
 
 But, there's the watchman of the town, I see ! 
 In alarm and haste, it seems ! He's running here 
 
 [ 7/r WATCHMAN enters, with a shout of alarm]. 
 Well, what's the matter ? 
 
 W. A most dreadful business : 
 
 One of the gods, just now Jupiter's gods 
 Has bolted through the gates, and driven on 
 Right into the atmosphere, in spite of us, 
 And all the jackdaws, that were mounting guard. 
 
 PEIS. \animated at the prospect of having something to 
 
 manage], 
 
 What an outrage ! what an insult ! Which of 'em ? 
 Which of the gods ? 
 
 W. We can't pretend to say ; 
 
 We just could ascertain that he wore wings. 
 We're clear upon that point, 
 
 PEIS. But a light party 
 
 Ought surely to have been sent in such a case ; 
 A detachment * 
 
 W. A detachment has been sent 
 
 Already : a squadron of ten thousand hawks, 
 Besides a corps of twenty thousand hobby hawks, 
 As a light cavalry, to scour the country : 
 Vultures and falcons, ospreys, eagles, all 
 Have sallied forth ; the sound of wings is heard, 
 Rushing and whizzing round on every side, 
 In eager search. The fugitive divinity 
 Is not far off, and soon must be discovered. 
 
 * Peisthetairus is exposed to a fresh mortification ; the orders which he 
 was ready to give have been anticipated ! He contrives, however, to detect 
 an omission, and upon the strength of it to assume a tone of authority and 
 command.
 
 244 THE BIRDS, 
 
 PEIS. Did nobody think of slingers ? Where are they ? 
 Where are the slingers got to ? Give me a sling. 
 Arrows and slings, I say ! Make haste with 'em. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 The verses which follow belong to a species of songs, which are alluded 
 to in Aristophanes more than once. They may properly be called 
 " Watch-son=," being; sung by the Watchmen and Soldiers on 
 guard, to keep themselves and their comrades awake and alert. 
 
 War is at hand, 
 On air and land, 
 
 Proclaimed and fixt. 
 War and strife, 
 Eager and rife, 
 
 Are kindled atwixt 
 This State of ours, 
 And the heavenly powers. 
 
 Look with care, 
 To the circuit of air, 
 
 Watch lest he, 
 
 The deity, 
 Whatever he be, 
 
 Should unaware 
 Escape and flee. 
 
 But hark ! the rushing sound of hasty wings 
 Approaches us. The deity is at hand. 
 
 PEIS. Holloh you ! Where are ye flying? Where are ye 
 
 going? 
 
 Hold ! Halt ! Stop there, I tell ye ! Stop this instant ! 
 What are ye ? Where do you come from ? Speak, 
 
 explain. 
 
 IRIS. Me? From the gods, to be sure! the Olympian 
 gods.
 
 THE BIRDS. 245 
 
 PEIS. [jiointiifg to the flaunting appendages of her dress~\* 
 What are ye ? With all your flying trumpery ! 
 A helmet ? or a galley ? What's your name ? 
 
 IRIS. Iris, the messenger of the gods. 
 
 PEIS. A messenger ! 
 
 Oh ! you're a naval messenger, I reckon, 
 The Salaminian galley, or the Paralian ? f 
 You're in full sail, I see. 
 
 IRIS. What's here to do? 
 
 PEIS. Are there no birds in waiting ? Nobody 
 To take her into custody? 
 
 IRIS. Me, to custody ? 
 
 Why, what's all this ? 
 
 PEIS. You'll find to your cost, I promise ye. 
 
 IRIS. Well, this seems quite unaccountable ! 
 
 PEIS. Which of the gates 
 
 Did ye enter at, ye jade ? How came you here ? 
 
 IRIS. Gates ! I know nothing about your gates, not I. 
 
 PEIS. Fine innocent ignorant airs, she gives herself ! 
 You applied to the pelicans, I suppose ? The captain 
 Of the cormorants on guard admitted you ? 
 
 IRIS. Why, what the plague ! what's this ? 
 
 PEIS. So, you confess ! 
 
 You come without permission ! 
 
 IRIS. Are you mad? 
 
 PEIS. Did neither the sitting magistrates nor bird- 
 masters 
 Examine and pass you ? 
 
 IRIS. Examine me, forsooth ! 
 
 PEIS. This is the way then ! without thanks or leave 
 
 * Iris, the rainbow personified, is of course attired in all the colours of 
 the rainbow, with abundance of lappets and streamers. 
 
 t The two sacred galleys of the Athenians. The most splendidly 
 equipped were despatched upon the most important occasions. See note, 
 page 187.
 
 246 THE BIRDS. 
 
 You ramble and fly, committing trespasses 
 
 In an atmosphere belonging to your neighbours ! 
 
 IRIS. And where would you have us fly then ? Us, the 
 gods ! 
 
 PEIS. I neither know nor care. But, I knor/ this, 
 They sha'n't fly here. And another thing, I know. 
 I know that, if there ever was an instance 
 Of an Iris or a rainbow, such as you, 
 Detected in the fact, fairly condemned, 
 And justly put to death it would be you. 
 
 IRIS. But, I'm immortal. 
 
 PEIS. [coolly and peremptorily\. That would make no 
 
 difference : 
 
 We should be strangely circumstanced indeed; 
 With the possession of a sovereign power, 
 And you, the gods, in no subordination, 
 No kind of order ! fairly mutinying, 
 Infringing and disputing our commands. 
 Now then, you'll please to tell me where you're 
 
 going? 
 Which way you're steering with those wings of yours ? 
 
 IRIS. I ? .... I'm commissioned from my father Jove,* 
 To summon human mortals to perform 
 Their rites and offerings and oblations, due 
 To the powers above. 
 
 PEIS. And who do you mean ? what powers ? 
 
 IRIS. What powers? Ourselves, the Olympian deities ! 
 
 PEIS. So then ! you're deities, the rest of ye ! 
 
 IRIS. Yes, to be sure. What others should there be ? 
 
 PEIS. Remember ! once for all ! that we, the Birds, 
 Are the only deities, from this time forth; 
 And, not your father Jove. By Jove ! not he ! 
 
 * Iris, in a great fright, hesitating and hurried, but attempting to assume 
 a tone of authority.
 
 THE BIRDS. 247 
 
 IRIS. Oh ! rash, presumptuous wretch ! Incense no more 
 The wrath of the angry gods ! lest ruin drive * 
 Her ploughshare o'er thy mansion ; and destruction, 
 With hasty besom sweep thee to the dust; 
 Or flaming lightning smite thee with a flash, 
 Left in an instant smouldering and extinct. 
 
 PEIS. Do ye hear her ? Quite in tragedy ! quite 
 
 sublime ! 
 
 Come, let me try for a bouncer in return. f 
 Let's see. Let's recollect. " Me dost thou deem, 
 Like a base Lydian or a Phrygian slave, 
 With hyperbolical bombast to scare ? 
 I tell ye, and you may tell him. Jupiter 
 If he provokes me, and pushes things too far 
 Will see some eagles of mine, to outnumber his, 
 With firebrands in their claws about his house. 
 
 And, I shall send a flight of my Porphyrions.| 
 A hundred covey or more, armed cap-a-pie 
 To assault him in his sublime celestial towers : 
 Perhaps, he may remember in old times, 
 He found enough to do with one Porphyrion. 
 
 And for you, Madam Iris, I shall strip 
 Your rainbow-shanks, if you're impertinent, 
 Depend upon it, and I myself, in person 
 Will ruin you, myself ! Old as I am. 
 
 IRIS Curse ye, you wretch, and all your filthy words. 
 
 PELS. Come, scuttle away; convey your person else- 
 where ; 
 Be brisk, and leave a vacancy. Brush off. 
 
 * A medley from terrific passages in the tragic poets. 
 
 t Peisthetairus at last hits upon a tragic passage which he thinks will 
 serve for a suitable reply. A vulgar line which disfigures a very fine scene of 
 Euripides. 
 
 t The Greek name for a flamingo, also the name of one of the giants who 
 made war against the gods.
 
 348 7V7.fi: BIRDS. 
 
 IRIS. I shall inform my father. He shall know 
 Your rudeness and impertinence. He shall, 
 He'll settle ye and keep ye in order. You shall see. 
 
 PEIS. Oh dear! is it come to that! No, you're 
 
 mistaken, 
 
 Young woman, upon that point, I'm not your man, 
 I'm an old fellow grown ; I'm thunder-proof, 
 Proof against flames and darts and female arts : 
 You'd best look out for a younger customer. 
 
 Poor Iris, in her rage, unwittingly makes use of the same sort of phrase 
 with which a young girl at Athens would repel, or affect to repel, 
 improper familiarities. Peisthetairus, taking advantage of this, 
 pretends to consider her indignation as a mere coquettish artifice 
 intended to inveigle and allure him. 
 
 The Athenian Father " I shall inform my father" maybe considered 
 as equivalent to the Irish Brother. The menace in one case would 
 imply a duel, in the other a lawsuit. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Notice is hereby given, 
 To the deities of heaven ; 
 Not to trespass here, 
 Upon our atmosphere ; 
 Take notice ; from the present day, 
 No smoke or incense is allowed 
 To pass this way. 
 
 PEIS. Quite strange it is ! quite unaccountable ! 
 That herald to mankind, that was despatched, 
 What has become of him ? He's not yet returned. 
 
 [Cn/er HERALD.] 
 
 HER. O Peisthetairus, happiest, wisest, best, 
 Cleverest of men ! Oh ! most illustrious ! 
 Oh ! most inordinately fortunate ! 
 
 Oh ! most .... Oh ! do for shame, do, bid me have 
 done.
 
 THE BIRDS. 249 
 
 PEIS. What are you saying ? 
 
 HER. All the people of Earth 
 
 Have joined in a complimentary vote, decreeing 
 A crown of gold to you, for your exertions. 
 
 PEIS. I'm much obliged to the people of Earth. But why? 
 What was their motive ? 
 
 HER. O most noble founder 
 
 Of this supereminent celestial city, 
 You can't conceive the clamour of applause, 
 The enthusiastic popularity, 
 
 That attends upon your name ; the impulse and stir, 
 That moves among mankind, to colonize 
 And migrate hither. In the time before, 
 There was a Spartan mania, and people went 
 Stalking about the streets, with Spartan staves, 
 With their long hair, unwashed and slovenly, 
 Like so many Socrates's : but, of late, 
 Birds are the fashion Birds are all in all 
 Their modes of life are grown to be mere copies 
 Of the birds' habits ; rising with the lark, 
 Scratching and scrabbling suits and informations; 
 Picking and pecking upon points of law ; 
 Brooding and hatching evidence. In short, 
 It has grown to such a pitch, that names of birds 
 Are given to individuals ; Chserephon 
 Is called an owl, Theagenes, a goose, 
 Philocles, a cock sparrow, Midias, 
 A dunghill cock. And all the songs in vogue, 
 Have something about birds ; swallows or doves ; 
 Or about flying, or a wish for wings. 
 
 Such is the state of things, and I must warn you, 
 That you may expect to see some thousands of them 
 Arriving here, almost immediately, 
 With a clamorous demand for wings and claws : 
 I advise you to provide yourself in time.
 
 250 THE BIRDS. 
 
 PEIS. Come, it won't do then, to stand dawdling here ; 
 Go you, fill the hampers and the baskets there 
 With wings, and bid the loutish porter bring them. 
 While I stop here, to encounter the new-comers. 
 
 It has been already observed in reference to the Chorus of the Acharnoe 
 (p. 68), that when his Choruses have ceased to contribute to the 
 progressive action of the drama, the poet has sometimes relieved 
 himself, from the embarrassment which they created, by turning into 
 ridicule the essential character and attributes of the Chorus itself. 
 
 In that comedy, as in the present, the hostility of the Chorus had given 
 spirit and animation to some of the earlier scenes, but, from the 
 moment when their hostility ceased, they had remained a mere 
 superfluous appendage ; nothing being left for them to be done, 
 and scarcely anything to be said ; they could barely contrive to 
 make their existence manifest from time to time by interposing with 
 the expression of their acquiescence and approbation. The poet 
 then having no further use for them, amuses his audience at their 
 expense. The character of Choruses (except when they happen to 
 be in a violent passion) being habitually obsequious and conform- 
 able their obsequiousness is represented as connected with the 
 display of Dicaeopolis's good cheer, the sight of which confirms 
 their favourable opinion of his political principles, and induces them 
 to pass over his selfish treatment of the poor countryman with an 
 apologetical observation. 
 
 But with respect to the Chorus now before us (that of the Birds}, there 
 is another point of the choral character (arising out of the very 
 condition of their existence as a Chorus) whicli must not be over- 
 looked. All Choruses are essentially poetic and imaginative, the 
 votaries of ideal harmony and beauty. Under this point of view, 
 the following passage places them in amusing contrast with the 
 practical active bustling spirit of Peisthetairus. The Chorus begin 
 chanting their namby-pamby anticipations of future splendour and 
 happiness, Peisthetairus, in the first instance, favouring them with 
 a sort of gruff acquiescence. But as they proceed he loses all 
 patience, contriving however to relieve himself, and give a vent to 
 his ill humour, by scolding the servant. The obsequious character 
 of the Chorus now displays itself; they affect to sympathize with his 
 impatience; expressing their own displeasure, in a style suited to 
 their choral character, that is to say, pedantic and formal. Peisthe- 
 tairus, utterly disgusted with them, evades their sympathy, by 
 relapsing into comparative good-humour. The Chorus then betake
 
 THE BIRDS. 251 
 
 themselves to their usual practice of exhorting and advising. This 
 is more than he can endure instead of taking any notice of them, 
 he flies into a pretended rage against his servant ; and is running 
 off the stage to beat him, when he is encountered by the first 
 specimen of the new colonists. 
 
 This explanation must not be regarded as fanciful or superfluous. 
 We should in that case be compelled to adopt a conclusion, in 
 which the admirers of Aristophanes would not readily acquiesce, 
 namely, that the poet had (in a play already of unusual length) 
 inserted a passage of twenty-four lines destitute of poetical merit, 
 without any comic intention and wholly unamusing as a dramatic 
 exhibition. 
 
 Peisthetairussays little in the following scene, but is not the less amusing, 
 from his restless fidget and ill-disguised impatience and disgust. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Shortly shall the noble town, 
 
 Populous and gay, 
 Shine in honour and renown. 
 PEIS. [drily]. Why, perhaps she may. 
 CHOR. The benignant powers of love, 
 
 From their happy sphere, 
 From the blest abodes above .... 
 PEIS. \venting his ill humour on the servant]. 
 Curse ye, rascal ! can't ye move ! 
 CHOR. .... Are descending here, 
 
 Where in all this earthly range,* 
 He that wishes for a change 
 
 Can he find a seat, 
 Joyous and secure as this, 
 Filled with happiness and bliss, 
 
 Such a fair retreat ? 
 Here are all the lovely faces, 
 Gentle Venus and the Graces, 
 And the little Cupid ; 
 
 The Chorus in their idealizing and poetical character.
 
 252 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Order, ease and harmony, 
 Peace and affability. 
 PEIS. The scoundrel is so stupid, 
 
 Quicker, sirrah ! bring it quicker ! 
 CHOR. Let him bring the woven wicker 
 
 With the winged store. 
 I, myself, in very deed, 
 With the varlet will proceed, 
 
 And smite him more and more ; 
 Like a sluggish ass he seems, 
 Or even, as a man that dreams, 
 Therefore smite him sore. 
 
 PEIS.| He's a lazy rogue, it's true. 
 
 CHOR.J Now range them forth, displayed in order due, 
 Feathers of every form and size and hue, 
 With shrewd intent, adapting every pinion, 
 To the new residents of your dominion. 
 
 PEIS. I vow by the hawks and eagles ! I won't bear it ; 
 I'll beat ye, I will myself, you lazy rascal ! 
 
 As a practical comment upon the anticipations of the Chorus, and as a 
 sample of the kind of population likely to resort to a new colony, 
 the first arrival is that of a young reprobate, who wishes his father 
 out of the way ; and who conceives that the laws of the Birds will 
 permit him to hasten that desirable conclusion. Peisthetairus 
 receives and attends to him, without being betrayed into any 
 expression of moral indignation, which would be inconsistent with 
 his character, as a perfect politician. He merely states, as a matter 
 of fact, some difficulties arising out of a point of law, professes a 
 wish to serve him, as a hearty partisan, well disposed to the cause 
 of the new colony ; and finally, in an easy way, recalls to his 
 recollection one of the precepts of his Catechism, and at the same 
 
 * Chorus in their obsequious character, but with a formal pedantic tone. 
 
 t Peisthetairus determined to cross them, relapses into good-humour. 
 
 t The Chorus assume their admonitory character ; Peisthetairus can bear 
 it no longer ; he breaks from them, and runs off the stage, as if to beat the 
 servant.
 
 THE BIRDS. 253 
 
 time points out to him a mode of life suited to his situation and 
 tastes. The young man, who is more of a wild, desperate, thai: a 
 confirmed villain, is struck with the suggestion, expresses a resolu- 
 tion to adopt it, and departs. 
 
 Enter a fellow, singing. 
 
 " Oh ! for an eagle's force and might,* 
 
 Loftily to soar 
 Over land and sea, to light 
 
 On a lonely shore." 
 
 PEIS. Well, here's a song that's something to the purpose. 
 Y. MAN. Ay, ay, there's nothing like it wings and 
 
 flying ! 
 
 Wings are your only sort. I'm a bird-fancier. 
 In the new fashion quite. I've taken a notion 
 To settle and live amongst ye. I like your laws. 
 
 PEis.f What laws do you mean? We've many laws 
 
 amongst us. 
 
 Y. MAN. Your laws in general ; but particularly 
 The law that allows of beating one's own father. 
 
 PEIS. Why, truly, yes ! we esteem it a point of valour, 
 In a chicken, if he clapperclaws the old cock. 
 
 Y. MAN. That was my view, feeling a wish in fact 
 To throttle mine, and seize the property. 
 
 PEIS. I Yes, but you'd find some difficulties here, 
 An obstacle insurmountable, I conceive ; 
 An ancient statute standing unrepealed, 
 Engraved upon our old Ciconian columns. 
 It says, that when a stork or a ciconia 
 Has brought his lawful progeny of young storks 
 To bird's estate, and enabled them to fly : 
 
 * From a chorus of Sophocles ; dramatic poetry and music was popular, 
 like opera airs on the Continent. See " Knights," p. 126. 
 t Peisthetairus very gravely and methodically. 
 J Peisthetairus with grea^ candour and composure simply stating a fact.
 
 254 THE BIRDS. 
 
 The sire shall stand entitled to a maintenance 
 At the son's cost and charge in his old age. 
 
 Y. MAN.* I've managed finely it seems to mend myself! 
 Forced to maintain my father after all J 
 
 Pzis.f No, no; not quite so bad ; since you're come here, 
 As a well-wisher to the establishment, 
 Zealous and friendly, we'll contrive to equip you 
 With a suit of armour, as a soldier's orphan. J 
 And now, young man, let me suggest some notions, 
 Things that were taught me when a boy. " Your father ?" 
 " Strike him not," rather take this pair of wings ; 
 And this cockspur;|| imagine, you've a coxcomb 
 Upon your head, to serve you for a helmet ; 
 Look out for service, and enlist yourself; 
 Get into a garrison ; live upon your pay ; 
 And let your father live. You're fond of fighting, 
 And fond of flying take a flight to Thrace ; 
 There you may please yourself; and fight your fill. 
 
 Y. MAN. By Jove, you're right The notion's not a bad 
 
 one. 
 I'll follow it up ! 
 
 PEIS. [very gravely and quietly]. 
 You'll find it the best way. [Exit. Y. MAN. 
 
 Cinesias, a lame dithyrambic poet and musician, arrives in the hopes of 
 being able to provide himself with wings, which will enable him to 
 look after his concerns among the clouds, the great emporium for 
 
 * Y. Man with a start of disappointment, slapping his forehead. 
 
 f Peisthetairus in a soothing consolatory tone. 
 
 J The sons of citizens slain were publicly presented with a suit of 
 armour. 
 
 } A want of harmony in the original verse appears to indicate the in- 
 sertion of a formula but again, if we resolve this formula into its two 
 component parts, the question and answer, with a consequent pause between 
 them, the harmony of the verse is very sensibly improved. The formula 
 was part of a series of moral prohibitions taught to children by question and 
 answer. 
 
 I Giving him a sword.
 
 THE BIRDS. 255 
 
 busine?s with all persons who are embarked in the dithyrambic 
 line. Peisthetairus amuses himself with affronting and laughing at 
 him, but he persists in his purpose, and professes his determination 
 to continue worrying and persevering, till it is accomplished. 
 The reader who refers to the original will perceive that the interrup- 
 tions, with which Peisthetairus breaks in upon Cinesias's recitation 
 or song, are omitted in the translation. To the Athenian audience, 
 the original must have been familiar, and probably sufficiently 
 hackneyed, to make them feel amusement at hearing it accompanied 
 with burlesque interruptions ; but as only one other fragment of 
 dithyrambic poetry has been preserved to modern times, and neither 
 of them has appeared in our language, it seemed more advisable to 
 present it to the English reader in an unbroken form.* 
 
 Enter CINESIAS, singing. 
 
 11 Fearless, I direct my flight, 
 To the vast Olympian height ; 
 Thence at random, I repair, 
 Wafted in the whirling air ; 
 With an eddy, wild and strong, 
 Over all the fields of song." 
 
 PEIS. Ah ! well, Cinesias, I'm quite glad to see ye ; 
 But, what has brought ye and all your songs and music, 
 Hobbling along with your old chromatic joints? 
 
 CIN. ]singing\. " Let me live, and let me sing, 
 Like a bird upon the wing." 
 
 PEIS. No more of that but tell us plainly in prose, 
 What are ye come for? what's your scheme, your object? 
 
 CIN. I was anxious to procure a pair of wings, 
 To say the truth ; wishing to make a tour 
 Among the clouds, collecting images 
 And metaphors, and things of that description. 
 
 PEIS. How so ! do you procure 'em from the clouds ? 
 
 CIN. Entirely ! Our dithyrambic business absolutely 
 Depends upon them ; our most approved commodities, 
 
 * It is singular that tins other fragment presents the image of flying.
 
 256 THE BIRDS. 
 
 The dusty, misty, murky articles, 
 With the suitable wings and feathers, are imported 
 Exclusively from thence. I'll give you a sample, 
 A thing of my own composing. You shall judge. 
 
 PEIS. But, indeed, I'd rather not. 
 
 CIN. But, indeed, you must; 
 
 It's a summary view of flying, comprehending it 
 In ail its parts, in every point of view. 
 
 CINESIAS, singing. 
 
 " Ye gentle feathered tribes, 
 Of every plume and hue, 
 That, in uninhabited air, 
 Are hurrying here and there ; 
 
 Oh ! that I, like you, 
 Could leave this earthly level, 
 For a wild aerial revel : 
 
 O'er the waste of ocean, 
 To wander, and to dally 
 
 With the billow's motion ; 
 Or, in an eager sally, 
 Soaring to the sky, 
 To range and rove on high 
 With my plumy sails. 
 Buffeted and baffled, with the gusty gales, 
 
 Buffeted and baffled " 
 
 \While CINESIAS is repeating these last lines, PEIS- 
 THETAIRUS comes behind him, and gives him a 
 flap with a huge pair of 'wings .] 
 CIN. A pretty, civil joke indeed ! 
 PEIS. What joke? 
 
 I'm only buffeting you with the plumy sails, 
 I thought it was what you wanted. 
 Cm. Well, that's fine!
 
 THE BIRDS. 257 
 
 Pretty respect for a master such as me, 
 A leader of the band, that all the tribes 
 Are ready to fight for, to bespeak him first. 
 
 PEIS. Well, we've a little unfledged chorus here, 
 That Leotrophides* hatched, poor puny nestlings, 
 I'll give 'em you for scholars. 
 
 CIN. Ah, laugh on ! 
 
 Laugh on ! but take may word for it, here I stay, 
 Till you provide me with a pair of wings, 
 Proper to circumnavigate the skies. [Exit CIN. 
 
 Peisthetairus is represented in the following scene, as a perfect master 
 of his art ; amusing himself in angling and playing with a s'upid, im- 
 pudent young scoundrel ; sometimes twitching him in with a slight 
 jerk of his hook, and again allowing him to run out to the full length 
 of his line. If any one passage were to be selected from the remains of 
 Aristophanes, as particularly illustrative of the manner in which he 
 delights to exhibit character, perhaps it would be this; it is not a 
 serious struggle for ascendency, such as he displays elsewhere ; in this 
 instance, he shows Peisthetairus as a consummate practitioner, re- 
 linquishing and reassuming it at pleasure. But this is one of those 
 scenes which, to be thoroughly appreciated, would require to be 
 developed in dramatic action by a superior comedian. The mere 
 printed page, unless we suppose the reader to bestow as much 
 attention on it as an actor would do in studying his part, will be 
 found to convey a very confused and inadequate notion of it. 
 
 The song with which the Sycophant enters, is said by the Scholiast to be 
 from Alcseus ; it should seem more consonant to his character, to 
 suppose it to be some modern parody or adaptation from one of the 
 comedies of the time. 
 
 Enter SYCOPHANT, singing. 
 
 " Tell us who the strangers are, 
 Gentle swallow. Birds of air, 
 Party-coloured., poor and bare, 
 
 Cinesias was ridiculed for his slight flimsy figure, adapted for flying ; 
 Leotrophides, the Scholiast tells us, resembled him in this respect. 
 
 I
 
 258 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Tell us who the strangers are. 
 
 Gentle swallow, tell me true." 
 PEIS. Here's a fine plague broke out. See yonder 
 
 fellow 
 Sauntering along this way, swaggering and singing. 
 
 SYC. Ho ! gentle swallow ! I say, my gentle swallow, 
 My gentle swallow ! how often must I call ? * 
 
 PEIS. Why, there it is ; the prodigal in the fable 
 Seeking for swallows in a ragged coat. 
 
 SYC. [in an arrogant overbearing tone\ 
 Who's he, that's set to serve out wings ? Where is he ? 
 PEIS. 'Tis I, but what do you want ? You should explain. 
 SYC. Wings ! Wings ! You need not have asked me. 
 
 Wings 1 want. 
 
 PEIS. Do you mean to fly for flannel to Pellene ? t 
 SYC. [a little disconcerted at this allusion to his attire], 
 No, no ! But I'm employed .... I employ myself, 
 In fact, among the allies and islanders ; 
 I'm in the informing line. 
 
 PEIS. [in a tone of very grave irony, which the SYCOPHANT, 
 not perceiving, proceeds more fluently than before]. 
 I wish you joy. 
 
 SYC. And a mover and manager for prosecutions, 
 In criminal suits, and so forth, you understand me ; 
 So I wish to equip myself with a pair of wings, 
 To whisk about, and trounce the islanders. 
 
 PEIS. Would it be doing things in better form, 
 To serve a summons flying, think ye ? 
 
 SYC. [not knowing -very well what to make of him]. No, 
 Not that, but just to avoid the risk of pirates. 
 To return in company with a flight of cranes, 
 
 * An expression of impatience in the original has been hitherto mistrans- 
 lated. 
 
 t Pellene was famous for woollen stuff. Pieces of it were given as prizes 
 at their public gan~.es
 
 THE BIRDS. 259 
 
 (As they do with the gravel in their gizzards), 
 With a bellyful of lawsuits for my ballast. 
 
 PEIS. [in a grave, primitive, and somewhat twaddling tone, 
 intended to reanimate the impertinence of the SYCOPHANT]. 
 So, this is your employment ! A young man 
 Like you, to be an informer ! Is it possible ? 
 
 SYC. Why shouldn't it ? I was never bred to labour. 
 
 PEIS. [as before]. But sure, there are other lawful occupa- 
 tions, 
 
 In which a brisk young fellow, such as you, 
 Might earn an honest, decent livelihood, 
 In credit and goodwill, without informing. 
 
 SYC. [thoroughly taken in, and thinkitig he has to deal with 
 a mere silly well-meaning old man, becomes emphatically 
 insolent]. 
 Wings, my good fellow ! wings I want not words. 
 
 PEIS. \drily]. I'm giving you wings, already. 
 
 SYC. [a little puzzled and taken aback\. What, with words ? 
 Is that your way? 
 
 PEIS. [in a tone of very grave banter]. 
 
 Yes, for mankind in general 
 
 Are winged as it were, and brought to plume themselves 
 In different ways by speeches and discourse. 
 
 SYC. [confused and puzzled]. 
 What, all? 
 
 PEIS. [as before}. Yes, all. I'll give you a striking instance: 
 You must have heard, yourself, elderly people 
 Sitting conversing in the barber's shop. 
 And one says " Well, Diitrephes has talked 
 So much to my young man, he has brought him at last 
 To plume himself in driving." And another 
 Says, that his son is quite amongst the clouds, 
 Grown flighty of late, with studying tragedy. 
 
 SYC. [with a sort of hesitating laugh]. 
 So, words are wings, you say. 
 
 I 2
 
 260 THE BIRDS. 
 
 PEIS. No doubt of it. 
 
 I say it, and I repeat it ; human nature 
 Is marvellously raised and elevated 
 By words. I was in hopes, that I might raise you 
 By words of good advice, to another sphere ; 
 To live in an honest calling. 
 
 SYC. \feeling himself bantered and beaten, but restive and 
 angry}. 
 
 But I won't though. 
 
 PEIS. [coolly]. Why, what will you do ? 
 
 SYC. [sulkily at first, but animating as he proceeds}. 
 
 Why, I won't disgrace my family, 
 My father and my grandfather before him 
 Served as informers ; and I'll stick to it, 
 The profession. So, you'll please to hand 'em me out ; 
 A pair of your best wings, vulture's or hawk's, 
 To fly to the Islands, with my summonses, 
 And home again, to record them in the courts, 
 And out again, to the Islands. 
 
 PEIS. [in a tone of interest and sympathy, as if he was 
 himself an amateur desirous of displaying his professional 
 knowledge"]. 
 
 Yes, that's well, 
 
 I understand ye, I think ; your method is, 
 To be beforehand with 'em ? Your defendant, 
 You get him cast for non-appearance, heh ? 
 Before he can arrive ; and finish him 
 In his absence, heh? 
 
 SYC. [completely taken in, delighted rubbing his hands], 
 By Jove, you're up to it ! 
 
 PEIS. Then, whilst he's sailing here you get the start, 
 And fly, to pounce upon the property, 
 To rummage out the chattels. 
 
 SYC. That's the trick, 
 
 The notion of it ! I see, you're up to it.
 
 THE BIRDS. 261 
 
 A man must whisk about, here and away, 
 Just like a whipping-top. 
 
 PEIS. Ay, yes, you're right, 
 
 I understand you the instance is a good one. 
 A whipping-top, you say. Well, by good luck 
 I've here a capital slashing suit of wings, 
 To serve ye, made of a cow-hide from Corcyra. 
 
 SYC. O heaven ! what's there ? a horsewhip ? 
 
 PEIS. Wings, I tell ye, 
 
 To whisk ye about, to flog ye, and make ye fly. 
 
 SYC. Oh dear ! oh dear ! 
 
 PEIS. Scamper away, you scoundrel ! 
 
 Vanish, you vagabond ! whisk yourself off ! 
 I'll pay ye for your practices in the courts, 
 Your pettifoggico rascalities. 
 
 [Exit SYC. 
 [to the attendants} 
 Come bundle up the wings. Let's take 'em back. 
 
 [Exeunt. 
 
 Fabulous notions, respecting the unknown portions of the world, seem 
 to have been nearly the same (or at least of the same character) in 
 the time of Aristophanes as in the days of Sir John Mandeville. 
 
 The marvels of these regions, known only to the Birds, are naturally 
 expatiated upon by a Chorus of Birds, when released from the busi- 
 ness of the stage and placed in immediate communication with the 
 audience. But it will be seen, that by a strange coincidence those 
 wonderful and remote objects have an unaccountable analogy to 
 things and persons at Athens ; as in the following instance of the 
 enormous tree, which by the botanists was considered as belonging 
 to the sycophantic genus ; but which was vulgarly called a Cleo- 
 nymus, whereas at Athens there happened to be a person precisely 
 of the same name, " Cleonymus," equally distinguished for his 
 size ; and having the same peculiarity of being classed among the 
 Sycophants. And what is more singular, as the Athenian Cleonymus 
 had lost his shield in battle, it so happened that his vegetable 
 counterpart was a deciduous tree, with leaves of a scutiform or 
 shield-like shape, which it was also in the habit of losing. 
 
 The antistrophe is a romantic and mysterious description of a junketing
 
 262 THE BIRDS. 
 
 public-house, which seems to have been in vogue ; but from which 
 it was not safe to return to town after dusk. Orestes, an heroic 
 name, was also the name or the nickname of a noted robber (see 
 " Acharnians," p. 77). It was reckoned extremely dangerous to 
 meet a demigod after sunset. 
 
 CHORUS. STROPHE. 
 
 We have flown, "and we have run, 
 Viewing marvels, many a one ; 
 In every land beneath the sun. 
 
 But, the strangest sight to see, 
 Was a huge exotic tree, 
 Growing, without heart or pith, 
 Weak and sappy, like a withe; 
 But, with leaves and boughs withal, 
 Comely, flourishing and tall. 
 
 This the learned all ascribe 
 To the sycophantic tribe ; 
 But the natives there, like us, 
 Call it a Cleonymus. 
 In the spring's delightful hours, 
 It blossoms with rhetoric flowers ; 
 I saw it standing in the field, 
 With leaves, in figure like a shield ; 
 On the first tempestuous day, 
 I saw it cast those leaves away. 
 
 ANTISTROPHE. 
 
 There lies a region out of sight, 
 Far within the realm of night, 
 Far from torch and candle light. 
 There in feasts of meal and wine, 
 Men and demigods may join, 
 There they banquet, and they dine, 
 Whilst the light of day prevails ;
 
 THE BIRDS. 263 
 
 At sunset, their assurance fails. 
 If any mortal then presumes, 
 Orestes, sallying from the tombs, 
 Like a fierce heroic sprite, 
 Assaults and strips the lonely wight. 
 
 The scene which follows may be considered as a short abstract of the 
 mode in which clandestine political information is received, attended 
 to, and dismissed. The informant presents himself with an extra- 
 ordinary display of precaution and apprehension ; he is received 
 with eagerness and cordiality, attended to with great earnestness, 
 interrupted only by some little ill-humour on the part of the man of 
 business, when, in seeking for information, he is obliged to betray the 
 want of it ; finally, he is dismissed with a sort of indifference, 
 approaching to derision, after having been thoroughly pumped and 
 drained of his intelligence. 
 
 PROMETHEUS, PEISTHETAIRUS, CHORUS. 
 
 PRO. [enters muffled up, peeping about him with a look of 
 
 anxiety and suspicion]. 
 
 Oh dear ! If Jupiter should chance to see me ! 
 Where's Peisthetairus ? Where? 
 
 PEIS. Why, what's all this ? 
 
 This fellow muffled up? 
 
 PRO. Do look behind me ; 
 
 Is anybody watching ? any gods 
 Following and spying after me ? 
 
 PEIS. No, none, 
 
 None that I can see, there's nobody. But you ! 
 What are ye ? 
 
 PRO. Tell me, what's the time of day ? 
 
 PEIS. Why, noon, past noon ; but tell me, who are ye ? 
 Speak. 
 
 PRO. Much past, how much ? 
 
 PEIS. [aside]. Confound the fool, I say 
 
 The insufferable blockhead !
 
 264 THE BIRDS. 
 
 PRO. How's the sky ? 
 
 Open or overcast ? Are there any clouds ? 
 
 PEIS. \aloud and angrily], 
 Be hanged ! 
 
 PRO. Then I'll disguise myself no longer. 
 
 PEIS. My dear Prometheus ! 
 
 PRO. Hold your tongue, I beg ; 
 
 Don't mention my name ! If Jupiter should see me, 
 Or overhear ye, I'm ruined and undone. 
 But now, to give you a full complete account 
 Of everything that's passing, there in heaven 
 
 The present state of things But first I'll trouble 
 
 you 
 
 To take the umbrella, and hold it overhead, 
 Lest they should overlook us. 
 
 PEIS. What a thought ! 
 
 Just like yourself ! A true Promethean thought ! 
 Stand under it, here ! Speak boldly; never fear. 
 
 PRO. D'ye mind me ? 
 
 PEIS. Yes, I mind ye. Speak away. 
 
 PRO. [emphatically]. Jupiter's ruined. 
 
 PEIS. Ruined ! How ? Since when ? 
 
 PRO. From the first hour you fortified and planted 
 Your atmospheric settlements. Ever since, 
 There's not a mortal offers anything 
 In the shape of sacrifice. No smoke of victims ! 
 No fumes of incense ! Absolutely nothing ! 
 We're keeping a strict fast fasting perforce, 
 From day to day the whole community. 
 
 And the inland barbarous gods in the upper country 
 Are broken out, quite mutinous and savage, 
 With hunger and anger; threatening to come down 
 With all their force; if Jupiter refuses 
 To open the ports, and allow them a free traffic 
 For their entrails and intestines, as before.
 
 THE BIRDS. 265 
 
 PEIS. [a little annoyed at being obliged to ask the question]. 
 What are there other barbarous gods, besides, 
 In the upper country ? 
 
 PRO. Barbarous ? to be sure '. 
 
 They're all of Execestides's kindred.* 
 
 PEIS. [as before hesitating, but with a sort of affected ease~\. 
 Well but the name now. The same barbarous deities 
 What name do you call 'em ? 
 
 PRO. {surprised at PEISTHETAIRUS'S ignorance]. 
 
 Call them ! The Triballi ! 
 
 PEIS. [giving rent to his irritation by a forced joke\. 
 Ah ! well then, that accounts for our old saying: 
 Confound the Tribe of them ! 
 
 PRO. [annoyed and drily\. Precisely so. 
 But, now to business. Thus much, I can tell ye ; 
 That envoys will arrive immediately 
 From Jupiter, and those upland wild Triballi, 
 To treat for a peace. But, you must not consent 
 To ratify or conclude, till Jupiter 
 Acknowledges the sovereignty of the birds; 
 Surrendering up to you, the sovereign queen, 
 Whom you must marry. 
 
 PEIS. Why, what queen is that ? 
 
 PRO. What queen ? A most delightful charming girl, 
 Jove's housekeeper, that manages his matters, 
 Serves out his thunderbolts, arranges everything; 
 The constitutional laws and liberties, 
 Morals and manners, the marine department, 
 Freedom of speech, and threepence for the juiies. 
 
 PEIS. Why, that seems all in all. 
 
 PRO. Yes, everything, 
 
 I tell ye, in having her, you've everything : 
 
 * Noted elsewhere in tins play as having no just claim to the rights of a 
 Citizen.
 
 266 THE BIRDS. 
 
 I came down hastily, to say thus much; 
 I'm hearty, ye know; I stick to principle. 
 Steady to the human interest always was.* 
 
 PEIS. Yes ! we're obliged to you for our roast victuals. 
 
 PRO. And I hate these present gods, you know, most 
 
 thoroughly. 
 I need not tell you that. 
 
 PEis.f \ivith a sort of half sneer\. No, no, you need not, 
 You're known of old, for an enemy to the gods. 
 
 PRO. Yes, yes, like Timon, I'm a perfect Timon; 
 Just such another. But I must be going; 
 Give me the umbrella; if Jupiter should see me, 
 He'll think that I'm attending a procession.^ 
 
 PEIS. That's well, but don't forget the folding chair, 
 For a part of your disguise. Here, take it with you. 
 
 [Exeunt. 
 
 Under the same form of a description of the wonders of the Terra 
 Incognita, we have here again one of those pieces of personal satire 
 peculiar to the ancient comedy. It is directed against Socrates and 
 his school, including by name his friend Choerephon. 
 
 The uncleanly habits imputed to them ("where baths and washing are 
 forbidden") will have been seen already alluded to in p. 249, 
 ("unwashed and slovenly like so many Socrates's") but it is 
 difficult to conceive what is the imputation conveyed, or alluded to, 
 by describing them as engaged in the evocation of spirits. 
 
 It is a question, which might form a curious subject of inquiry for those 
 who have the means of prosecuting it, and who are better acquainted 
 ' with the history of the Socratic school. 
 
 Pisander seems to have been an object of the poet's peculiar aversion ; 
 in his first political comedy, " The Babylonians," he had been 
 
 * Prometheus had incurred the wrath of Jupiter by his kindness to man- 
 kind in having bestowed on them the gift of fire. 
 
 t Peisthetairus, who has learned all that he wanted to know, does not 
 care to lose his time in listening to professions of zeal and attachment. He 
 contrives, however, to conclude civilly with a piece of obliging attention. 
 
 J The Canoephoroi were followed by a person tearing an umbrella and a 
 folding chair.
 
 THE BIRDS. 267 
 
 mentioned in company with two * others, as having given occasion 
 to the origin of the war, by their extortion of compulsory presents 
 from the subject States, an accusation which is repeated in "The 
 I.ysistrata," v. 490; again in "The Peace," v. 396, his military 
 pomp and arrogance are mentioned as objects of extreme disgust 
 and contempt, and it seems that he must have been the commander 
 described at length in the Epirrema of the same comedy, most 
 splendidly caparisoned and foremost in running away. He had 
 also been stigmatized by Eupolis as having been guilty of cowardly 
 conduct. 
 
 It seems that he is brought in here, by-the-by, not as a follower or 
 disciple of Socrates, but in allusion to his want of military courage, as 
 a person whose spirit -wanted to be raised, and who therefore naturally 
 resorted to a place where spirits were raised. 
 
 Chcerephon was the most zealous admirer of Socrates ; he is recorded to 
 have been a person of most singular aspect. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Beyond the navigable seas, 
 
 Amongst the fierce Antipodes, 
 
 There lies a lake, obscure and holy, 
 
 Lazy, deep, melancholy, 
 
 Solitary, secret, hidden, 
 
 Where baths and washing are forbidden. 
 
 Socrates, beside the brink, 
 Summons from the murky sink 
 Many a disembodied ghost; 
 And Pisander reached the coast, 
 To raise the spirit, that he lost; 
 With a victim, strange and new, 
 A gawky camel,t which he slew 
 
 * ' ' T\vo ; " for by putting the participle in the dual, and transposing 
 the verb and the proper name, the true metre of the fragment (the long 
 anapaest) may be restored. 
 
 t A simile by juxtaposition indirectly expressed as when Adam is described 
 tall and fair beneath a palm-tree and the gigantic warriors in Homer 
 standing before the lofty gates. The indirect simile may be either beautiful 
 or sublime, or, as in the present instance, ludicrous.
 
 268 THE BIRDS. 
 
 Like Ulysses whereupon, 
 The grizzly sprite of Chaerephon 
 Flitted round him ; and appeared 
 With his eyebrows and his beard, 
 Like a strange infernal fowl, 
 Half a vampire, half an owl. 
 
 It is usual with Aristophanes to omit that explanation which a poet of 
 the new comedy would have put into a soliloquy, or into a con- 
 fidential conversation between the master and his slave. He gives 
 his audience credit for being able to comprehend at once the 
 previous views of the person whom he introduces. 
 
 Neptiine, the chief of the Embassy, in which Hercules and the barba- 
 rous Triballian deity are joined with him, has settled in his own 
 mind a very satisfactory plan for the management of it. " Hercules 
 is my nephew, and of course looks up to me. He will be easily 
 managed, if I can appear to consult and advise exclusively with 
 him. But I must begin by putting the Triballian wholly out of the 
 question, as a ragamuffin whom we are both equally ashamed of. 
 Otherwise, their understandings are so much upon a par, my poor 
 nephew, I am sorry to say, is such a blockhead, that he and that 
 beast, the Triballian, from the mere natural sympathy of their 
 stupidity, will join and act together in spite of me." He accordingly 
 begins with the Triballian, by settling his dress for him, and as soon 
 as he has disposed of him, and set him down, as an unproduceable 
 ruffian, he turns round to consult Hercules, who makes a stupid 
 answer. Neptune, like a kind uncle, endeavours quietly and calmly 
 to set him right. Up to this point everything appears promising ; 
 but Neptune, alas ! is deficient in presence of mind, he is encumbered 
 with his dignity ; and above all, in the person of Peisthetairus, he 
 is opposed to a politician, infinitely his superior in resources and 
 address. They advance within sight of Peisthetairus, who affects 
 not to notice them, and remains looking down among the dishes, 
 apparently occupied with his sauces. Neptune, of course, advances 
 no farther, but remains with a decided attitude and look of dignity, 
 ready to meet his eye, as soon as it shall be raised to encounter his. 
 Unfortunately, however, he is so much occupied with his own 
 attitude, and with the look which seems to say " well, sir, now 
 you're at leisure," that he omits to restrain Hercules, who, more 
 impatient and indignant, presses forward with an announcement of 
 their arrival, calculated, as he thinks, to rouse and astonish Peislhe- 
 tairus; failing in his attempt to make an impression, and feeling
 
 THE BIRDS. 269 
 
 himself at a loss, he remains exposed to the influence of his natural 
 instincts, which attract him towards the pans and dishes. Hence, a 
 conversation is begun, a recognition takes place, the ice is broken, 
 and the negotiation opened ; while Neptune is left with his dignity 
 in the background. 
 
 NEPTUNE, tJie TRIBALLIAN ENVOY, HERCULES. 
 
 NEP. There's Nephelococcugia, that's the town, 
 The point we're bound to, with our embassy. 
 
 \turning to the TRIBALLIAN] 
 But you ! What a figure have ye made yourself! 
 What a way to wear a mantle ! slouching off 
 From the left shoulder ! hitch it round, I tell ye, 
 On the right side. For shame come so ; that's better, 
 These folds, too, bundled up. There, throw them round 
 Even and easy so. Why, you're a savage, 
 A natural bora savage. Oh ! democracy! 
 What will it bring us to ? When such a ruffian 
 Is voted into an embassy ! 
 
 TRI. [to NEPTUNE, who is pulling his dress about.] 
 
 Come, hands off! 
 Hands off! 
 
 NEP. Keep quiet, I tell ye, and hold your tongue, 
 
 For a very beast : in all my life in heaven, 
 I never saw such another Hercules, 
 I say, what shall we do ? What should you think ? 
 
 HER. What would I do? What do I think? I've told 
 
 you 
 
 Already .... I think to throttle him the fellow, 
 Whoever he is, that's keeping us blockaded. 
 
 NEP. Yes, my good friend ; but we were sent, you 
 
 know, 
 To treat for a peace. Our embassy is for peace. 
 
 HER. That makes no difference ; or if it does, 
 It makes me long to throttle him the more.
 
 270 THE BIRDS. 
 
 PEIS. [very busy, affecting not to see theni\. 
 Give me the Silphium spice. Where's the cheese-grater? 
 Bring cheese here, somebody ! Mend the charcoal fire. 
 
 HER. Mortal, we greet you and hail you ! Three 
 
 of us 
 Three deities. 
 
 PEIS. \without looking up\. But I'm engaged at present; 
 A little busy, you see, mixing my sauce. 
 
 HER. Why sure ! How can it be ? what dish is 
 
 this? 
 Birds seemingly! 
 
 PEIS. \without looking up\. Some individual birds, 
 Opposed to the popular democratic birds, 
 Rendered themselves obnoxious. 
 
 HER. So, you've plucked them, 
 
 And put them into sauce, provisionally? 
 
 PEIS. [looking up\ Oh ! bless me, Hercules, I'm quite 
 
 glad to see you. 
 What brings you here ? 
 
 HER. We're come upon an embassy 
 
 From heaven, to put an end to this same war .... 
 
 SERV. [to PEISTHETAIRUS]. 
 The cruet's empty, our oil is out 
 
 PEIS. No matter, 
 
 Fetch more, fetch plenty, I tell ye. We shall want it. 
 
 HER. For, in fact it brings no benefit to us, 
 The continuance of the war prolonging it ; 
 And you yourselves, by being on good terms 
 Of harmony with the gods .... why, for the future, 
 You'd never need to know, the want of rain, 
 For water in your tanks ; and we could serve ye 
 With reasonable, seasonable weather, 
 According as you wished it, wet or dry. 
 And this is our commission coming here, 
 As envoys, with authority to treat.
 
 THE BIRDS. 271 
 
 PEIS. Well, the dispute, you know, from the beginning, 
 Did not originate with us. The war 
 (If we could hope in any way to bring you 
 To reasonable terms) might be concluded. 
 Our wishes, I declare it, are for peace. 
 If the same wish prevails upon your part, 
 The arrangement in itself, is obvious. 
 A retrocession on the part of Jupiter. 
 The birds, again to be reintegrated 
 In their estate of sovereignty. This seems 
 The fair result ; and if we can conclude, 
 I shall hope to see the ambassadors to supper. 
 
 HER. Well, this seems satisfactory ; I consent. 
 
 NEP. \to HERCULES]. What's come to ye ? What do ye 
 
 mean ? Are ye gone mad ? 
 You glutton ; would you ruin your own father, 
 Depriving him of his ancient sovereignty ? 
 PEIS.* [to NEPTUNE]. Indeed ! And would not it be a 
 
 better method 
 
 For all you deities, and confirm your power, 
 To leave the birds to manage things below ? 
 You sit there, muffled in your clouds above, 
 While all mankind are shifting, skulking, lurking, 
 And perjuring themselves here out of sight. 
 Whereas, if you would form a steady strict 
 Alliance with the Birds, when any man 
 (Using the common old familiar oath 
 " By Jupiter and the crow") f forswore himself, 
 The crow would pick his eyes out, for his pains. 
 
 NEP. Well, that seems plausible that's fairly put. 
 
 HER. I think so, too. 
 
 * Peisthetairus with the civil, good-humoured sneer of a superior under- 
 standing, 
 f See p, 204 and note.
 
 272 THE BIRDS. 
 
 PEIS. \to the TRIBALLIAN]. Well, what say you? 
 
 TRIH. Say true.* 
 
 PEIS.J Yes. He consents, you see! But I'll explain 
 
 now 
 
 The services and good offices we could do you. 
 Suppose a mortal made a vow, for instance, 
 To any of you ; then he delays and shuffles, 
 And says " the gods are easy creditors." 
 In such a case, we could assist ye, I say, 
 To levy a fine. 
 
 NEP. [open to conviction, but anxious to prcceed on sure 
 ground]. 
 
 How would you do it ? Tell me. 
 
 PEIS. Why, for example, when he's counting money, 
 Or sitting in the bath, we give the warrant 
 To a pursuivant of ours, a kite or magpie ; 
 And they pounce down immediately, and distrain 
 Cash or apparel, money or money's worth, 
 To twice the amount of your demand upon him. 
 
 HER. Well, I'm for giving up the sovereignty, 
 For my part. 
 
 NEP. [convinced, but wishing to avoid responsibility) by 
 voting last}. 
 
 The Triballian, what says he ? 
 
 HER. [aside to the TRIBALLIAN, showing his fist]. 
 You, sir; do you want to be well banged or not ? 
 Mind, how you vote ! Take care how you provoke me. 
 
 TRIE. Yaw, yaw. Goot, goot. 
 
 HER. He's of the same opinion. 
 
 NEP. Then, since you're both agreed, I must agree. 
 
 * It is singular that these two syllables are the last syllables of the word 
 (or sentence), in his own language, by which the Triballian expresses his 
 consent. 
 
 t Peisthetairus very volubly quite at his ease.
 
 THE BIRDS. 273 
 
 HER. \shoutlng to PEISTHETAIRUS, the negotiators having 
 
 withdrawn to consult at the extremity of the stage], 
 Well, you ! we've settled this concern, you see, 
 About the sovereignty ; we're all agreed. 
 
 PEIS. Oh faith, there's one thing more, I recollect, 
 Before we part ; a point that I must mention. 
 
 As for dame Juno, we'll not speak of her ; 
 I've no pretensions, Jupiter may keep her; 
 But, for that other queen, his manager, 
 The sovereign goddess, her surrender to me 
 Is quite an article indispensable. 
 
 NEP.* Your views, I find, are not disposed for peace : 
 We must turn homewards. 
 
 PEIS. As you please, so be it. 
 
 Cook, mind what you're about there with the sauce ; 
 Let's have it rich and savoury, thicken it up ! 
 
 HER. How now, man ? Neptune ! are you flying off? 
 Must we remain at war, here, for a woman ? 
 
 NEP. But, what are we to do ? 
 
 HER. Do ? Why, make peace. 
 
 NEp.f I pity you really ! I feel quite ashamed 
 And sorry to see you ; ruining yourself! 
 If anything should happen to your father, 
 After surrendering the sovereignty, 
 What's to become of you ? When you yourself 
 Have voted away your whole inheritance : 
 At his decease, you must remain a beggar. 
 
 PEIS. [aside to HERCULES]. Ah there ! I thought so ; he's 
 
 coming over ye ; 
 Step here a moment ! Let me speak to ye ! 
 
 Your uncle's chousing you, rr,y poor dear fiiend, 
 
 * Neptune with gravity and dignity. 
 
 f Neptune in great wrath, like a grave uncle scolding a great fool of a 
 nephew.
 
 274 THE BIRDS. 
 
 You've not a farthing's worth of expectation, 
 From what your father leaves. Ye can't inherit 
 By law : ye're illegitimate, ye know. 
 
 HER. Heigh-day ! Why, what do you mean ? 
 
 PEIS. I mean the fact! 
 
 Your mother was a foreigner; Minerva 
 Is counted an heiress, everybody knows ; 
 How could that be, supposing her own father 
 To have had a lawful heir ? 
 
 HER. But, if my father 
 
 Should choose to leave the property to me, 
 In his last will. 
 
 PEIS. The law would cancel it ! 
 
 And Neptune, he that's using all his influence 
 To work upon ye, he'd be the very first 
 To oppose ye, and oust ye, as the testator's brother. 
 
 I'll tell ye what the law says, Solon's law : 
 " A foreign heir shall not succeed,* 
 Where there are children of the lawful breed : 
 But, if no native heir there be, 
 The kinsman nearest in degree 
 Shall enter on the property." 
 
 HER. Does nothing come to me, then? Nothing at all, 
 Of all my father leaves ? 
 
 PEIS. Nothing at all, 
 
 I should conceive. But you perhaps can tell me. 
 Did he, your father, ever take ye with him, 
 To get ye enrolled upon the register ? 
 
 HER. No, truly I .... thought it strange, ... he ... 
 never did. 
 
 * Memory must have been in the earliest times the sole repository of 
 knowledge of every kind. Every means therefore of assistance to the 
 memory was most carefully cultivated. Amongst other instances, in order 
 to facilitate the requisite knowledge and recollection of them, the Laws 
 themselves were composed and recorded in a metrical form. Hence the 
 same word in Greek signifies both a Song and a Law.
 
 THE BIRDS. 275 
 
 PEIS. Well, but don't think things strange. Don't stand 
 
 there, stammering, 
 
 Puzzling and gaping. Trust yourself to me, 
 'Tis I must make your fortune after all ! 
 
 If you'll reside and settle amongst us here, 
 I'll make you chief commander among the birds, 
 Captain, and Autocrat and everything. 
 Here you shall domineer and rule the roast, 
 With splendour and opulence and pigeon's milk. 
 
 HER. [in a more audible voice, and in a formal decided 
 
 tone*]. 
 
 I agreed with you before : I think your argument 
 Unanswerable. I shall vote for the surrender. 
 
 PEIS. [to NEPTUNE]. And what say you ? 
 
 NEP. [firmly and vehemently}. Decidedly I dissent. 
 
 PEIS. Then it depends upon our other friend, 
 It rests with the Triballian, what say you ? 
 
 TRI. Me tell you ; pretty girl, grand beautiful queen, 
 Give him to birds. 
 
 HER. Aye, give her up, you mean. 
 
 NEP. Mean ! He knows nothing about it. He means 
 
 nothing 
 But chattering like a magpie. 
 
 PEIS.J Well " the magpies." 
 
 He means, the magpies or the birds in general. 
 The republic of the birds their government 
 That the surrender should be made to them. 
 
 NEP. [in great wrath\ Well, settle it yourselves; amongst 
 
 yourselves ; 
 In your own style : I've nothing more to say. 
 
 * They had withdrawn apart, and their previous conversation was sup- 
 posed not to have been audible to Neptune and the Triballian, whose 
 by-play might have consisted in Neptune's formal attempts to soothe and 
 gain the Triballian, who would only shrug up his shoulders. 
 
 f Peisthetairus being sure of his point, amuses himself with arguing non- 
 sensically to provoke Neptune.
 
 276 THE BIRDS. 
 
 HER. [to PEISTHETAIRUS]. 
 Come, we're agreed in fact, to grant your terms ; 
 But you must come, to accompany us to the sky ; 
 To take back this same queen, and the other matters. 
 
 FEIS. [very quietly]. It happens lucky enough, with this 
 
 provision 
 For a marriage feast. It seems prepared on purpose. 
 
 HER. Indeed, and it does. Suppose in the meanwhile, 
 I superintend the cookery, and turn the roast, 
 While you go back together. 
 
 NEP. ['//// a start of surprise and disgusi\. Turn the 
 
 roast ! 
 A pretty employment! Won't you go with us? 
 
 HER. No, thank ye ; I'm mighty comfortable here. 
 
 PEIS. Come, give me a maniage robe ; I must be going. 
 
 We have here another satyric song, of the same fanciful humour as the 
 preceding, descriptive of imaginary wonders in an unknown world. 
 In the last instance, the poet had exhibited a caricature of the 
 Socratic school of philosophy. The same vein of ridicule is now 
 directed against another novelty, tending equally, in the opinion 
 of the poet (more just in this than in the preceding instance) 
 to produce an undesirable change in the general character of the 
 nation. 
 
 Mercenary professors and teachers of rhetoric, for the most part 
 foreit;ne!S (the Gorgias for instance here mentioned was a Sicilian), 
 had of late been received and encou-aged in Athens. Their public 
 exhibitions, which were generally resorted to, had operated as an 
 incentive to the natural propensity of the Athenian people, already 
 more than enough disposed to divert their attention to the unpro- 
 ductive pursuits of litigation and speechifying. While at the same 
 time their private lessons (the course of instruction by which they 
 engaged to communicate the secrets of their art, and to form young 
 practitioners) were purchased in some instances at an enormous 
 price, by young men of wealth aspiring to political eminence and 
 celebrity. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Along the Sycophantic shore, 
 And where the savage tribes adore
 
 THE BIRDS. 277 
 
 The waters of the, Clepsydra,* 
 There dwells a nation, stern and strong, 
 Armed with an enormous tongue, 
 
 Wherewith they smite and slay : f 
 
 With their tongues, they reap and sow, 
 And gather all the fruits J that grow, 
 
 The vintage and the grain ; 
 Gorgias is their chief of pride, 
 And many more there be beside 
 
 Of mickle might and main. 
 
 Good they never teach, nor show 
 But how to work men harm and woe, 
 
 Unrighteousness and wrong ; 
 And hence the custom doth arise, 
 When beasts are slain in sacrifice, 
 
 We sever out the tongue. 
 
 It has been already observed, that this play, in the success of which, as 
 a sedative to the popular insanity, the higher orders of the com- 
 munity were essentially interested, was exhibited with a singular 
 recklessness of expense. 
 
 The concluding scene seems to have been equal in magnificence to those 
 of the most gorgeous tragedies ; and it is remarkable that in the 
 passage immediately following, contrary to the invariable custom of 
 the poet, there is no tinge of burlesque. The poet has throughout, 
 as a poet, imitated the style of Sophocles ; while under his direction, 
 as the manager of a comic drama, the actor who personated Peis- 
 thetairus, must have been instructed to reduce the scene to the level 
 of comedy,, by his airs and gestures characteristic of unaccustomed 
 dignity and authority. It must have been a very delica'e and amusing 
 
 * The Clepsydra, or water-clock, marked the time allotted to each advo- 
 cate. It was a prominent object in the Courts of Justice. The name also 
 belonged to certain streams and springs. 
 
 t Dangerous as accusers. 
 
 t Their salaries and profits. 
 
 This sacrificial form was peculiar to the Athenians.
 
 278 THE BIRDS. 
 
 piece of acting. An elderly man, a sharp, thorough -going fellow 
 to see him 
 
 Assume the god, 
 
 Affect to nod, 
 And seem to shake the spheres ! 
 
 The choral songs which follow are of a peculiar and by no means ob- 
 vious character, which it is rather difficult to define, and not very 
 easy to express in imitation. In the comedy of "The Peace" we 
 have a rustic Epuhalamium, perfectly rustic, and probably not very 
 different from the rustic extempore poetry of the same race at the 
 present day. But in this instance we have a town Epithalamium, 
 such as we may suppose to have been composed and perpetrated in 
 honour of the nuptials of the more noble and wealthy families in 
 Athens. The vulgar town poet is anxious to exhibit his education 
 by imitating and borrowing passages from the most approved lyrical 
 poets, but at the same time reduces all their imagery and expressions 
 to the natural level of his own dulness. Thus maintaining, in the 
 verse itself, that balance of the ludicrous and sublime, which in the 
 first part of the scene had resulted from the contrast of the poetry 
 and the action. 
 
 Some parts of the Epuhalamium of Catullus (see v. loo and the fol- 
 lowing stanzas) are evidently a humorous imitation of the vulgar 
 Epithalamia at Rome. Under cover of this character, he amused 
 himself at the expense of his new married friends. 
 
 HARBINGER or HERALD, announcing the approach 
 of PEISTHETAIRUS. 
 
 O fortunate ! O triumphant ! O beyond 
 All power of speech or thought, supremely blest, 
 Prosperous happy birds ! Behold your king, 
 Here in his glorious palace ! Mark his entrance, 
 Dazzling all eyes, resplendent as a star ; . 
 Outshining all the golden lights, that beam 
 From the rich roof, even as a summer sun, 
 Or brighter than the sun, blazing at noon. 
 
 He comes ; and at his side a female form 
 Of beauty ineffable ; wielding on high, 
 In his right hand, the winged thunderbolt, 
 Jove's weapon. While the fumes of incense spread
 
 THE BIRDS. 279 
 
 Circling around, and subtle odours steal 
 Upon the senses from the wreathed smoke, 
 Curling and rising in the tranquil air. 
 
 See, there he stands ! Now must the sacred Muse 
 Give with auspicious words her welcome due. 
 
 SEMICHORUS. 
 
 Stand aside and clear the ground, 
 Spreading in a circle round 
 With a worthy welcoming ; 
 To salute our noble king 
 In his splendour and his pride, 
 Coming hither, side by side, 
 With his happy lovely bride. 
 
 O the fair delightful face ! 
 What a figure ! What a grace ! 
 What a presence ! What a carriage ! 
 What a noble worthy marriage. 
 
 Let the birds rejoice and sing, 
 At the wedding of the king : 
 Happy to congratulate 
 Such a blessing to the State. 
 
 Hymen, Hymen, Ho ! 
 
 Jupiter, that god sublime, 
 When the Fates, in former time, 
 Matched him with the Queen of Heaven, 
 At a solemn banquet given. 
 Such a feast was held above ; 
 And the charming God of Love, 
 Being present in command, 
 As a Bridesman took his stand, 
 With the golden reins in hand. 
 
 Hymen, Hymen, Ho !
 
 2 So THE BIRDS. 
 
 PEIS.* I accept and approve the marks of your love, 
 Your music and verse I applaud and admire. 
 But rouse your invention, and raising it higher, 
 Describe me the terrible engine of Jove, 
 The thunder of earth and the thunder above. 
 
 The reader may have already observed, that in more than one instance 
 the poet directs the attention of his audience to the lavi>h expen- 
 diture of the Choregus. This seems to have been the object of the 
 following lines, introductory to a new display of theatrical thunder 
 manufactured upon an improved principle. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 O dreaded bolt of heaven, 
 
 The clouds with horror cleaving, 
 
 And ye terrestrial thunders deep and low 
 
 Closed in the subterranean caves f below, 
 
 That even at this instant growl and rage, 
 
 Shaking with awful sound this earthly stage ; 
 
 Our king by you has gained his due ; 
 
 By your assistance, yours alone, 
 
 Everything is made his own, 
 
 Jove's dominion and his throne; 
 
 And his happiness and pride, 
 
 His delightful lovely bride. 
 
 Hymen, Hymen, Ho! 
 
 PEISTHETAIRUS. 
 
 Birds of ocean and of air, 
 Hither in a troop repair, 
 
 * Peisthetairus puts an end to their nonsense with condescension and 
 affability. 
 f Caves of the theatre.
 
 THE BIRDS. 281 
 
 To the royal ceremony, 
 Our triumphant matrimony ! 
 
 Come for us to feast and feed ye ! 
 
 Come to revel, dance, and sing !- 
 Lovely creature ! Let me lead ye 
 Hand in hand, and wing to wing. 
 
 THE END. 
 
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