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LETTEKS
OF
"EXTINGUISHER."
SINGAPORE :
PRINTED FOK THE AUTHOR
AT THE " MISSION PRESS " OFFICE.
18 7 0.
i-f
G. DANKER PRINTER, MISSION PRESS— SINGAPORE.
DEDICATED
&o tf>e Sbutynts of t$m lEptstlos,
TRUSTING THAT THEY WILL RECEIVE
THEM IN THE SPIRIT WITH WHICH THEY
WERE WRITTEN.
EXTINGUISHER.
M166577
PREFACE,
EXTINGUISHER UNTO HIS FRIENDS GREETING ;
Inasmuch as some among you have asked of me
to publish these my Epistles, place I them before
you, believing that you asked it not from their worth
as writings, but as an echo of your own minds.
u What is writ is writ ;
Would it were worthier."
*
^^%^y ^r^-^e ^w^y^
LETTERS
OF
EXTINGUISHER.
Sir, — In the Island of Singapore, that lieth over against Malacca,
which is in the far Indies, in the days of the reign of Col. Cavena',
there dwelt many great and good men who were called Government
Officials, because that they fished all they could out of the Govern-
ment.
But among these was one possessed of a little soul, who thought
himself larger than other men, and wished others to think even as
he did.
And he said unto himself: What shall I do that I may cause
my name to be heard, and make myself to be great, even above my
brother officials ?
And he went about seeking how he might encompass his designs.
And it so happened that this man whose name was Mustirattin-
dint, of the tribe of the Scots, had among his other duties with the
vessels which traded in merchandize with far countries, (and which
lay in the harbour near Singapore), to see that the lamps of these
vessels were trimmed and lighted when darkness covered the face of
the Earth.
Now this was done on the land by Celestials which resemble
men, save that they have tails, but on the water was it this man's
work.
And as he wandered along the shores of the Sea he espied many
of these carriers of merchandize with no light.
And he said unto himself: I have not told unto those men who
command these vessels that they must show a Burning light, so to-
morrow they will do even as to-day, and I will come down upon
them in the dead of night with a lead pencil, and I will take the
names of these vessels, and of their wicked masters, (who, perad-
venture, are like unto the foolish virgins) and I will bind them that
they pay unto me fifty shekels of silver, even fifty pieces of silver
from each vessel, so that my name may shine like a burning light
throughout the laud.
8 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
Now it all came to pass even as he had said unto himself, and the
men of the sea did pay each man fifty shekels of silver, but a cry
went up from among these men, because of this unjust deed.
Now it came to pass that this wail reached even to the ears of the
Governor, who was a just man in all his walks, and who was called
Cavena' (after the manner of the Scots) because that he would never
" cave in" to the wrong.
And he sent for Mustirattindint and said unto him. Why hast
thou done this wrong thing ?
And Mustirattindint answered and said " Lo, I thought to do
that which was pleasant and good in thy sight, and now thou up-
braidest me. And the Governor answered him saying, Give back
unto these men of the sea every shekel that thou hast taken so
unjustly from them.
Then Mustirattindint subsided: And he went out from the
presence of the Governor.
Is* Feby. 186C.
IN re DAVIDSON vs: ORD. X
"The Lawyers' Fix" or "How I would have done it."
By Extinyidsher
In One Act — One Scene.
Persons Represented.
-JT Col. Mc F. — Judge of Supreme Court.
Falstaff ]
Kayu Puti [-Lawyers.
Kayu Puti Kitchil )
Sheriff
Scene— Court Room, Singapore.
Enter Lawyers and Sheriff.
Sheriff. — " Good morning all ! I come with noose prepared to
snare the Lawyers."
Falstaff. — " Take care, good Sir, that thou in thy warm zeal,
entangle not thyself, for lawyers are not birds to be by such chaff
caught."
Enter Col. Mc F. with big books bound in calf under his arm.
LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER. 9
Col. Mc F. — " How now, ye fiends ! dare ye in sacred Court of
Justice wrangle thus ? know ye that in my power it lies, for this
contempt of Court to send ye all to " quod"! One of your number
lies there now for conduct similar, pale and wan with rings of iron
on his legs, counting the weary hours as they do drag their tedious
length along, with nought but B, and S. to keep his spirits up ; to
keep these up, he puts the spirits down. Silence then, all, and hear
me well, while I do mete out justice.
(Gets poetical) " To me for Writ ofHabeas Corpus, one Falstaff
11 has applied, to let the Son of Davicrrrom vile durance slide. In
" Law I am not deep, and so, for two whole nights, I've had no
" wink of sleep, but through these stupid books have sought to find,
•' some precedent of case like this defined." (Turning to Sheriff)
" Sheriff 1 hast thou the Corpus safe in hand, which these litigious
" men of me demand "?
Sheriff. — " My Lud ! I have it not ; though I do hear it lingers
" still in quod, and clanks its chains, while vowing vengeance."
Judge. — " You have it not ? Oh ! then the case looks queer"?
(Turns over pages of Blachstone) "but jovial Blackstone makes
" the point quite clear.'' " So"! tome 2 page 9, case Doe and Roe"
(reads) u When one has not a corpus in his charge, he cannot give
" it up to go at large." " This wise assertion seems to me quite
" grand, and shows me just exactly how I stand. I therefore
" cannot give the writ y'apply for, if for non-issue, I it die for."
Kayu Puti, Kayu Puti Kitchil, Falstaff, loq:—
" Fudge ! who in the de'il ever saw such Judge."
Judge. — " What dared ye say ! ! For this contempt of Court,
" I will to quod the whole of ye transport ; and now are left no
" more bold men of sin (whom all agree to heaven they do'nt let
" in) so 't strikes me I've now spoiled your little sport, and hold
" ye where the wool is very short, for none remain to ask for you
"a writ; now, Sheriff, see they all to Jail do flit."
(Exeunt Lawyers in charge of dark Policemen).
Judge (getting prosy) Now Justice reigns supreme, and Law
shall not again these portals darken !
{Exit with salute of 21 guns)
Exeunt Omnes.
10 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
ACT I. SCENE I.
Town Hall — Benicia,
Enter
Governor Sahara.
(So called on account of place of birth.)
Chief Justice.
Heads of Departments.
Hon'ble Men.
Gov. loq. — In this our forum have we met, that we in confab
close may quietly discuss the " freedom of the press." As for
myself I do object to't.
Heads of Departments. — It doth us proud that we, with your
Celestial Highness, should agree. We all, in thy majestic person,
are made one, and therefore 'tis for us to speak but as thine echo.
Tummus Shot. — (for the Honorable men.) Well — Rubbut is an
honorable man, yea, both of us are honorable men, and therefore
will we not, in clamor, raise our voices ? In fine, why should we
leave our gods, the dollars and the cents, to mix in such Celestial
company ?
Our voices are but as the wind, and when the Governor does
ope his mouth, the deed is done.
Why, therefore, should jve waste our valuable time in useless
protests?
Capt. of Vol. Host. loq. — I'll tell thee why, mine honorable
brother.
Is't not a goodly sight to see our names on all our chits with glo-
rious " honorable" superscribed ? And those among us, who did
leave their country for their country's good, can thus be lost to
sight, for 'mongst our kinsfolk dear 'twould never sure be dreamed
that we were honorable. We then among them may appear in high
estate, and with this foreign name attached to ours, Ave may in time,
in our own fatherland, be thus considered.
Chief Justice. — I must remind my honorable brothers, that they
from off the matter have departed, yet as my Scottish friend awhile
ago did say, it matters little what he thinks or speaks upon the
subject. Why not then end the farce, and let the great Mogul at
once say " Thus it is," and there the matter's settled ?
LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER. 11
As for myself, I think it best that we among us have no Mem-
bers of the press our crude words to report. From what I've seen
thus far, but few there are among us who can frame a speech, while
far the greater part like Logs do sit, until the Governor speaks his
mind, and then the Logs with one accord, through magnetism won-
derful, jump to the same conclusion with His Majesty.
I therefore think, that Members of the Press should be excluded,
from all of our debates, until the moment that His Excellency shall
speak, and then they have the matter settled without further waste
of valuable time.
Governor, — I move that Members of the Press with note-books
in their hands be not admitted.
Attorney General. — Most righteous judgment!
Auditor General. — Wisdom personified !
Treasurer General. — The very words I should have used!
Colonial Secy, fy Engineer, — Of course !
Clerk of Councils^ — I had already entered it as law, so soon as I
did hear his Highness speak.
Adjourned for cool drinks,
Singapore, 18th June, 1868.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE,
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE.
CHAPTER I.
I. In the days of Victoria, Queen of England, there dwelt
certain of her subjects in the Island of a distant sea, and it being
so far removed from her throne, she sent unto them a Governor that
he might rule over them in her name.
2 Now this Governor had but one leg, for said Victoria unto
herself: It is but a small place, therefore will I not send a whole
man unto them.
3. And when the Governor was come unto this Island which
is called Singapura, after the manner of the Malays even unto this
day, he did rule the people of Victoria with a just hand.
4. And he shewed kindness unto them, even like unto the kind-
ness of a woman.
5. Then the people of Victoria did murmur among themselves,
and said one unto another — What manner of man is this that has
been sent to rule over us ? His ways are too easy that he should
be permitted to rule over men : Rather let him be in charge of a
land of women and children, but send unto us a man in whom
dwelleth some "snap."
6. And they did write unto their Queen even as they spoke.
7. Now when Victoria heard these things she did even as they
asked, and she sent unto these people a new Governor.
8. And the new Governor did as he was commanded, and went
unto them to preside over them.
9. And when he was arrived, he called a carpenter unto him
and commanded him that he should make unto him a throne.
10. Now throne in the language of the Dictionary is a chair
of State, but in the language of the world it signifies a seat of
Royalty.
II. So the people were wroth, and said among themselves,
What is it that this man doeth? Shall he make himself a King
over us ?
12. And they with one accord declared that he should be sent
from among them, even into the land of Coventry should he be sent-
16 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
13. But the Governor mounted his throne, and the people
agreed to wait yet a little longer.
14. Now the Governor being a wise man, said unto himself,
This place is surrounded with water, and how can I remove myself
and my goods when it seems good unto me.
15. And he looked about him, and behold the only vessel he
could find, which was of the chattels of the former Governor had
no bottom, and the screw was loose.
16. And he called the Elders of the people unto him, and spake
saying : What shall I do that I may have a steamer worthy of
my royalty.
17. And they with one accord replied : Lay taxes upon the
people, and buy such an one as seems good unto our master.
18. And he went out and bought, and paid 60,000 shekels
of silver.
10. But the end was not yet.
20. And it came to pnss, that as he wandered through the
chambers of his palace, his leg went through the floor, even into
the chamber below protruded his leg.
21. And one of his servants standing near, seeing what had hap-
pened, cried out, Master ! would that I might suffer in thy stead.
22. And the Governor was sore vexed and summoned the El-
ders of the people again before him, and said unto them, What is
this thing that you have done unto me ? Behold the house that you
have prepared for me is rotten, even unto the beams. Is it that
you desire to have another one legged Ruler over you ?
23. And the Elders of the people trembled before him, and
answered: Master lay more taxes upon thy servants, and buy
land and- pull down houses and build such a temple as seemethgood
unto thee.
24. And he did even as they said unto him.
25. And the land was filled with sorrow, for the pockets of the
people were tender, and they lifted up their voices, and cried with
one accord, " Let him go from among us, lest we all starve."
CHAPTER II.
1. Now this Governor had been a ruler over Convicts, and the
ways a n d customs of good and free m«n were new unto him.
i
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. % 17
2. And he passed many laws, that were obnoxious unto the
people.
3. Now the Governor was a man of letters, and could read.
4. And he read a parchment which told of the feudal times.
5. Now he did see that in those days travellers were ofttime de-
tained by feudal lords and cast into dungeons, and it remembered
the Governor of his own former time, and he was pleased.
6. Then said he unto himself. "Have I not had my own will
tlms far in all things— wherefore then should I not be like unto
those men of old ?"
7. Lo ! I will make a law, and it shall give me power even
greater than the power of the Queen.
8. And it shall be in this wise; when any man, who is not of
the people of Victoria sheweth himself in my dominions, and I like
him not; then shall it be that I will send unto him a chit and will
order him that he travel.
0. And if he travel not, then I will cast him into a dungeon,
and there shall be none to release him.
10. For I will put an end to the old law, even an end to the
Hah fag Corpus.
11. Now there were much people in the land of Singapura
which were not of the house of Victoria.
1*2. And they marvelled greatly, and began to say among them-
selves " Is it not better for us that we skedaddle. Verily this man
is possessed of an eril spirit.''
CHAPTER III.
In answer to " Snuffers' and " John Brown''' who called in
question the right of" Extinguisher" being a foreigner, to criticise
the acts of Government.
1. Now at that time there arose certain scribes who called
themselves .Snuffers, and they did make light of the writings of a
Philosopher of the period.
2. And the Philosopher was called the Extinguisher, — because
that he labored to extinguish whatever seemed wrong in the cus-
toms of his friends.
3. Moreover, he was a good man and his walks were in the
path.' of virtue.
4. Now when the Governor of the Island of Singapura did do
18 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
those things which seemed wrong in the eyes of Extinguisher, he
did speak his mind on all these acts.
5. And it was not done in a spirit of bitterness, neither was
it to bring derision upon the rulers, but that the rulers might see
how those subject to them, did look upon their acts, and that they
might be brought to think more deeply upon them.
(). Now this Philosopher was perhaps in the wrong, but he had
a head even like unto the head of a Governor, and is it not written
that two heads are better than one, even if one is a sheep's head ?
7. So he did write.
8. And when the Snuffers did see what was written, they mur-
mured at it because the Philosopher was not of the House of Vic-
toria, and was a stranger among them.
9. But the Progenitors of the Philosopher were of the same
blood, and he felt like a brother among them.
10. Moreover he spake the same tongue.
11. And it came to pass that when it was seen what was spoken
by the Snuffer3, there arose great indignation among certain of the
people.
12. And the days of the Snuffers were numbered — And the
days of the last of the Snuffers, after that he was discovered, were
two, and he died.
13. And there was no one to mourn for them.
14. Then arose John Brown, No. 93, and he did also write and
speak against this good man,
15. And he was a man of ignorance and could not spell.
16. Moreover his Uncle, called George, was a man of sin, and
was stoned to death because that he did cheat a young virgin of her
small change.
17. And the days of John Brown after that he had written were
three, and he died.
18. And there was great rejoicing because that there was now
none left to abuse
EXTINGUISHER.
CHAPTER IV.
1 And it came to pass that a ship which was in the waters that
encompassed Singapura did take fire.
2. Now this ship had cost much money and the body of it was
filled with cotton, which merchandize was of great price so that
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 19
there was much consternation in the island when the news was
noised abroad, 4$?- ^
3. When Mustirattindint Heard this thing he hurried to the sea-
side, for it was one of the duties of this man to put out fires in the
harbor.
4. And he reasoned within himself, and said : Lo ! now is a good
time to make our Ruler appear well in the eyes of the people. Did
he not tell unto them of how much use the new vessel would be
unto them, even the ' Peiho,' (for that was her name.) And straight-
way he went on board the ' Peiho,' and did take the burning vessel
in tow, and did pilot her unto a safe anchorage.
5. And the people said : Surely this vessel is of some use.
6. But when the Governor heard it, he was wroth, and he sent
unto Mustirattindint that he should come before him.
7. And when he was come, he rebuked him, saying : What
manner of thing is this : Is my yacht to be as a pilot boat, even as
a tug to the vessels of my subjects. >*■
8. And Mustirattindint answered him never a word, but felt
mixed.
9. And the end was not yet.
10. Now it was that in the days of the former Ruler, the Chris-
tian Brethren had agreed among themselves that they would build
a house. ^
11. And the Christian Brethren were good and pure men, who
had done much good in the Colony, so that all men looked upon
them kindly, howl eit their worship was not as the worship of the
children of Victoria.
12. And the chief Ruler had promised unto them bricks to
build their house.
IS. And it was agreed that a certain class of Government Offi-
cials, called Convicts, should make these bricks, and that the Breth-
ren should pay for them only so much as they did cost.
14. Now when the new Ruler was come they went unto him
and said, Master, we be come for our bricks, even the bricks that
were agreed upon by Colonel Cavenagh.
15. And they showed him the promise of the Colonel in writing.
16. But he answering said unto them : I do not know him of
whom you speak, for he departed from the coast ere I came, and I
did not have the pleasure of an introduction, neither is his hand-
writing known unto me.
17. Behold now shall ye make your bricks without straw even
as was commanded of the Israelites of old.
20 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHED
18. And they departed from his presence.
19. And the children of Victoria were sad, for the Christian
Brethren were poor, and bricks were cheap, and they felt that the
word of the former Ruler in such matter should have been sacred.
CHAPTER V.
1. And it came to pass that a disturbance arose in the land of
the Betelnuts which being interpreted is Penang.
2. And the Chief Ruler heaving thereof and finding the climate
of Singapore rather warm, betook himself to that country.
o. Now when he arrove there, the troubles had continued nigh
unto fourteen days, and there had been murder and rapine abroad,
and no man knew the number that had been slain.
4. But none of the men of the land of Jonbool were hurt, for
the troubles were among two tribes of the Celestials, called the
Goins and the Topi Kongs.
5. But much of the property of the men of Jonbool was des-
troyed, and they cast about to find how they should make good
their losses.
Now the Governor was a man of snap, and possessed of a spirit
called Bak Bone.
6. And he called unto him the chief men of the Goins and the
Topi Kongs, and said unto them : Why have ye allowed this wrong
thing.
7. And they answering said . How could it have been pre-
vented by us.
8. And he answered : Lo ! are ye not the rulers over these
tribes, and can these thing3 be, if ye set your faces against them ?
9. And they spake in their defence, saying : Lo ! have you not
a tribe called Fanyuns in the country called Ouldairen in the land
of Jonbool.
10. And is not Victoria the head man of the Fanyuns, as also
of all the tribes of Jonbool. Why, then, shall you not make her
responsible for the Fanyuns, even as you would make us answer
for the deeds of the Goins and the Topi Kongs.
11. And he answering said : Ye have spoken well, and right
dwelleth on your side. Nevertheless, I would show my power unto
the men of all lands.
12. And ye shall each of you pay unto me 10,000 shekels of
silver, and shall make good the property which has been destroyed
by the Goins and the Topi Kongs.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 2t
13. And ye shall be cast into utter darkness, until the money
be paid.
14. And he cast them into prison.
15. Now when the news came unto the coast of Singapura of
what things the Governor had done, the people wondered much.
16. For it was written in the laws of the land of Jonbool that
no ruler of the land should take upon himself to do such deeds.
17. And it came to the earjiof a notable pleader called John,
whose surname was Hatchsoon, because of his appearance.
18. [For is it not written that coming events cast their shadows
before.]
19. Therefore was he called Hatchsoon.
20. And John said within himself: This Governor has done
those things which are not lawful : And he has cast men into pri-
son without trial. Lo ! I will take the part of these Celestials, even
the Head Sinters of the Goins and the Topi Kongs,
21. And I will show unto them that they have been badly treat-
ed and that there is no need that this money be paid. And I will
plead for them, that the right may prevail,
22. For he was a good man, and cared not for lucre, which is
called filthy, even unto this day, so that no man with clean hands
and a pure heart will touch it.
23. So he departed,
24. And the hearts of the people went with him, for the men of
Jonbool were just, so that even though their houses and goods were
destroyed, they would not that men be punished without a hearing
before the Judges.
25. For the men of Jonbool were not without blemish in the
Far East, for they had boned much land,
26. " Now to bone, being interpreted, is to rob, and to bone
land is in the language of the men of Jonbool to Colonize, but in
the language of the men of the Far West, even in the land of Bruthir
Jonathan, though they be of the same tongue, is to annex.',
27. And there was much impatience that the end of this thing-
might be heard.
CHAPTER VI.
1. And the Chief Ruler, after a short absence, returned to
ingapura.
2. Now when he was come nigh unto the coast, a mighty
22 Letters of extinguisher.
shadow came over that part of the island which is called Govern-
ment Hill.
3. And the people were filled with amazement and ran about
saying : Lo ! it is a bright day, neither is there any cloud in the
firmament. Whence then cometh this shadow ?
4. But some of the people who were standing by the river-side
looked toward the flag-staff, and beheld an immense flag, of such
a size as had never before been seen in those parts, and it cast a
great shadow upon the earlh.
5. And upon the flag was a large crown.
6. Now it was not lawful that any but the royal family should
have a crown upon a flag,
7. So the news was noised abroad that the good Victoria, even
the Queen of the land of Jonbool, or Andrew Johnson, the Pre-
sident of the land of Unculsam, had arrove.
8. And there was much rejoicing.
( J. And the people flocked from their houses that they might
greet Victoria or Andrew as they approached.
10. Now when the ship which had the same flag as that on
the flag-staff came nigh unto land a boat was lowered, and a man
descended into it, and was rowed by the sailors towards the shore.
11. And when the people saw that it was a man, they said
among themselves, Lo ! this is not Victoria ; it is Andrew, even
Andy of the land of Unculsam,
12. But as he came nigh, they discovered that it was the
Chief Ruler.
13. And they were one and all filled with amazement, and
said : It cannot be a Crown that we saw on the flag : Verily it
must have been a Bull, even an Irish Bull.
14. And they look fixedly at the flag.
15. And some among them squinted through tubes, which are
called Spy-glasses.
16. But they all agreed that it Avas a Crown.
17. Then said Snuffers, whose surname was John, and who
was a wise man among the people : I say unto you that ye are all
sold, every man except myself.
18. For it was given unto me for a long time to know that our
Chief Ruler was of the Royal family.
19. Now ye know wherefore it was that he ordered a throne,
and moreover why he takes upon himself such power, even autho-
rity greater than the Queen.
20. For it is written that in this generation a man knoweth
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 23
more than his mother, and if he know more, why shall he not
do more.
21. And our Prince came among us in disguise that he might
see whether we were loyal and worthy subjects of Victoria, our
Queen.
22. Now when the people heard these things they were filled
with fear, and their limbs quaked, like unto the limbs of them
with the ague.
23. Then arose their Philosopher, and turning up his nose,
spake unto the people : Fear not : Perhaps even now he is not of
the Royal blood, but is playing a goak.
24. Now goak in the language of the men of Unculsam, is being
interpreted into the tongue of the men of Jonbool, a sell.
25. And the people, after making enquiry in many places,
knew that it was even as the Philosopher had said.
26. And they were indignant in that they had been sold.
CHAPTER VII.
1. Now there was a certain profession among the people which
was called Banking, and the men of that calling were Bankers.
2. And there was one among their number which was noted
for the gentleness of his demeanor, and for his Christianity.
3. But his gentle heart was also filled with indignation like
unto the hearts of the others.
4. And he said unto himself : Has not the Chief Ruler sold
me ; why then shall I not sell the Chief Ruler ?
5. Is it not written, that ye shall do unto others even as others
do unto you.
6. So he cast about how he should encompass his design.
7. And as he sought, his eyes fell upon a piece of paper, which
had come from the house of the Chief Ruler.
8. And there was no writing upon it.
9. So he sat himself down and wrote unto a merchant that
the Chief Ruler would like to have the advice of this merchant
at all times and on all subjects, even in the Council Chamber.
10. For it is written, that two heads are better than one.
11.. And he sent the parchment unto the merchant.
12. Now when the merchant saw it, he was pleased, for he
said : Our Chief Ruler does many things which are not right in
24 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
mine eyes. Now therefore I will try if I can turn him from his
evil ways.
13. And he wrote unto the Chief Ruler, and promised that he
would advise him, even as much as he wished.
14. And he sent this parchment unto the Chief Ruler.
15. So when the Ruler saw what was done in his name he was
wroth, and would have given the Banker over to the tormentors,
but they had sloped. y
16. And the merchanfwas wroth, but he was a good man,
and a gracious, and his bowels of compassion were open, and he
frankly forgave the Banker. X
17. Yet his frame was weiry,* and he could have punished the
Banker had it seemed good unto him to do so.
18. And moreover, the merchant besought the Chief Ruler,
that he would cause no noise in the matter.
19. But the Chief Ruler was a man of war, and had no bowels
of compassion.
20. So he caused a parchment to be written to the Banker, and
he reviled him therein, calling him a forger, which being inter-
preted means a thief.
21. Then the people saw that the Chief Ruler did not appre-
ciate goals.
CHAPTER VIII.
1. Now it was a custom of the people of Singapura, that they
should choose from among their number three men who were noted
for their industry and for their wisdom.
2. And they were called Municipal Commissioners, because
that they were commissioned by the people to make contracts with
the men of the East for works of necessity in the town.
3. And it was among their duties to see that the roads were
kept clean, and that drains were built to carry off the filth, so
that no sickness might come among the people by reason of evil
vapors and stenches arising from the ditches by the roadside.
4. Moreover, they made themselves responsible that the men
of the East who did these things should receive just payment.
5. And they also did contract for the building of public houses,
Wiry P. D,
sfoeA <r/*.^£-
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 25
and for these and for the drains a vast number of bricks were
required.
G. And the former Ruler had always given bricks unto them,
even bricks make by the Government Officials called Convicts,
which were cheaper and better than other bricks.
7. So it was the custom of the Municipals to enter into con-
tracts for bricks likewise.
8. Now when the Chief Ruler heard these things, he was sore
vexed, for he said within himself : These men have too much
authority in the land: Verily, I will show unto them that this is a
one man Government.
9 Therefore sent he word unto them, saying : Ye shall make
no more contracts of any nature, and ye shall also refuse to fulfil
those which ye have already made.
10. And nary a brick which ye have promised from my clay-
pits shall be delivered unto you.
11. Moreover, ye shall return unto me every brick that is in
the hands of the builders.
12. For I have need of them to build my palace upon the hill
which is called Prinseps, which being interpreted, meaneth 'the
hill of the Prince.'
13. Now when the Municipal Council heard these words, great
fear came upon them, and they consulted among themselves what
they should do.
14. And one of them which was a Lawyer rose up, and he
placed his ringer upon his nose, even upon the side of his nose,
and said, Walker.
15. Now Avhen a man places his finger upon his nose, and says,
Walker, it meaneth, Not as I nose on.
16. Then arose another of the Councillors, and he spake unto
the Council, saying :
17. Brethren, how is it possible for us that we can do this thing
that is demanded of us.
18. Verily, if we break these contracts which we have made,
shall not those men with whom we have bargained, take us into
the Court before the Judges, and shall not damages be awarded
unto them.
1 9. Therefore it is not possible that we break our engagements.
20. Then arose another member, and opened his mouth and
spake, saying: Brethren, why should we vex ourselves? Lo, we
will possess our souls in peace, and it shall be that when we be
taken before the Judges, and damages shall be given against us,
Vb LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
we will bring witness that we would have fulfilled our contracts,
but that the Governor prevented us, and we will bring an action
against the Ruler.
21. And they asked the Lawyer if this might be done.
22. And the Lawyer, answering, said unto them: Yea, verily,
that can we do, and he charged his brethren that they should pay
unto him five Mexicans, even five shekels of silver each for the advice.
23. And each man gave unto him a chit for five shekels, but
charged him that he should not say anything more.
24. Then the spirit of the Municipal Council arose, and the
members did likewise.
CHAPTER IX.
1. Now in the building which was called the Town Hall, the
people had placed paintings and images of the Rulers who had go-
verned Singapura aforetime, and who were beloved by the people.
2. Moreover, the payment for these was from the pockets of the
people and of their own free-will.
3. And the Governor, wandering about the Town Hall, seeking
what he might devour, did cast his eyes upon the paintings and
images.
4. And immediately his soul was filled with a great longing for
them.
5. And he said within himself, Lo! these things would beautify
the walls of my palace, and I must demand of the Municipal Com-
missioners that they deliver them up to me.
6. For the Municipals were also Custodians of the property of
the people.
7. Aud he sent word unto the Municipals that they should send
them to him.
8. And the Municipals told unto the people what had been de-
manded.
9. Then the people were sore vexed, and said: What manner
of Ruler is this that he should do these things. Verily lie will come
into our houses, and possess himself of whatsoever seemeth good in
his eyes.
10. For are not these paintings and images our own, even as
much as the property under the roofs of our houses.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 27
11. And they instructed the Municipals that they should be
firm, and they should not be trodden down.
12. And immediately the spirit Bak Bone entered into the Mu-
nicipal Commissioners, and they could not be bent.
CHAPTER X.
1. And when the Governor saw that the spirit Bak Bone had
entered into the Municipal Commissioners, and that his arguments
were of no avail, he sought how he could circumvent them.
2. For he wished greatly to obtain the paintings.
3. And he called unto him one of his evil counsellors (which
being interpreted is Legislative Councillors,) whose surname was
Thomas, and whose fame was so great that he was called the Queen's
Counsel
4. [For it was a custom in the land of Jonbool, to call men of
repute Avho wrought in gold, Queen's Jewellers ; and men who
wrought in hair, Queen's Barbers : and those who were cunning in
sausage meat, Queen's Butchers ; and to judge by the number of
the Queen's Counsel, she must have been before the Judges ofttime.]
5. And the Governor said unto Thomas: Tell me, I pray thee,
how I may flank these Municipals.
6. Now to flank, in the language of the men of Unculsam, is to
strike behind the ear, when the enemy is too scientific or possessed
of too much firmness to allow of being prevailed over at the front.
7. So he sought to strike the Municipals behind the ear.
8. And Thomas answered and said: Master, make first a sugges-
tion, that I may not disagree with thee.
9. Then said the Governor: Thou hast spoken well: Lo these
Municipals are possessed of the spirit Bak Bone, and they will not
give unto me the paintings which I desire, and which are in the
building called the Town Hall.
10. Verily, I will wait until the Municijml Commissioners shall
have adjourned, and I will possess myself of the keys of the Town
Hall, and will fasten up the paintings and images contained therein.
11. And 1 will claim the Town Hall and all that therein is.
12. Now when the Chief Ruler had ceased speaking, Thomas being-
permitted of the Governor, opened his mouth, and spake, answering;
13. Not so Master, lest by that means you lose the painting of
28 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
Col. Cavenagh which is even now on the road.
14. Tarry until that also is placed in the Hall of the People,
and then shall you be able to annex the whole.
15. And the Chief Ruler, after that Thomas had spoken, waxed
exceeding wroth, and his cheeks were puffed out with rage.
16. Then spake he unto Thomas, saying: How is it that you
call this the Hall of the People.
17. And Thomas answered mildly ; I called it the Hall of the
People in that the people paid for it.
18. And the payment for it was made of their own free will,
and not by taxes.
19. Nevertheless, since the name appeareth not good unto my
master, I will call it the Castle of St George for ever more.
20. When the Kuler heard this he was mollified, for the name
received favor in his eyes, for he himself was called Saint, and his
front name was George, though some mischievous ones did call him
Old Harrji. ^
21. Nevertheless, he desired to be more assured, and he spake
on after this wise:
22 But have not the people given over the Castle of St. George
to the Municipals, and can 1 not claim all that is in the hands of
the Municipals.
28. Then Thomas answering, said ; I pray my Master that he
be not angry, but 1 am a Lawyer, therefore must I tell the truth.
24. And the Governor bit his nether lip lill the blood gushed
out: And the Royal blood remains on the garment which is not
mentionable till this day as a testimony unto these words.
25. And in a low voice he spake, saying : Thomas, say on.
20. Then Thomas being emboldened said: Master, the people
have not given over the Castle of St. George to the Municipals; nei-
ther have they vested any right of possession in them ; only as a
Committee for the care of the Castle have they bespoken them.
Therefore have you no right to it except such as might gives.
27. And when the Ruler heard this, he was vexed as with an
evil spirit, and would not listen to the advice of his Counsellors,
though they were evil, for the evil in them was not enough for his
possessed spirit.
28. And he sat him down, and wrote at once that the Castle of
St. George should be delivered up to him, and all that it contained.
29. Moreover, he ordered the painting of Cavenagh the Good to
be given up to him so soon as it should arrive.
30. But he told the Municipals that they might reimburse the
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 29
people from the Treasury for the cost of the painting.
31. But the people were stupid and could not see it, for they
reasoned among themselves after this wise :
32. Is not the Treasury our pockets, and have we not paid once
for the painting : Now he does wish that Ave should pay again.
33. And a certain Banker held the talents of silver which had
been given by the people for the payment of the picture.
34. And the number of the talents were three hundred, eighty
and six.
35. And when he heard this thing, he buried these talents in
the earth ;
3G. Lest, he said, the Ruler get both paintings and money.
37. And the people applauded this act of the Banker.
38. But of the Uuler they said with one accord : Surely this is
the Old Harry,
CHAPTER XL
1. And it came to pass that when these things came to the ears
of the Queen of the land of Jonbool, she was much troubled.
2. And she sent for her chief counsellor who was called Darby,
and said unto him.
3. Lo ! we have sent unto our people of Singapura a ruler for
whom there is no respect. — Tell me now what shall we do that
they may show reverence unto him
4. And Darby scratched his head, for it was a hard problem
which was proposed unto him.
5 And suddenly there shone a bright light in his countenance,
for an idea had occured unto him, even a solution of this difficult
problem.
0, And lie opened his mouth, and spake unto the Queen, saying :
I have hit it.
7. And she answered : Wherein?
8. Then said Darby : Did not my gracious Queen offer unto one
Field, of the land of Unculsam, whose surname is Cyrus, that he
should be a knight of the land of Jonbool, because that he had put
down much iron wire at the bottom of the sea, between our own
land and the land of Unculsam :
9. Behold now the honor was refused by Cyrus, because that the
30 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
custom is not known in his own country, for the Chief Ruler of the
land of Unculsam is called Mister only, aud none is acknowledged
above him.
10. And had Cyrus accepted this honor, he would have been
laughed to scorn, because of the ignorance of the Yeugeese, even
the men of the land of Unculsam.
11. And so it happens that there be a vacancy among the knights.
12. Peradventure, if our good Queen make the Chief Ruler of
Singapore a knight in the place of CyrUs, the man of wire, then
shall the people shew reverence unto him.
13. So the Chief Ruler was made a knight, and the people of
Singapura called him Knight of the Iron Cross, because that he was
made from or crossed with the man of Iron Wire, even Cyrus of
the Yengeese.
14. And when the news came unto the people, they said among
themselves — Surely our good Queen knows not of this man's doings.
CHAPTER XII.
1. Now after the Chief Ruler was benighted by the Queen, he
did wax exceeding large, even larger than before.
2. And he did question within himself how he might obtain
more absolute power over his people.
3. And he consulted Avith some of his evil counsellors,
4. Then came Thomas, one of the Council, unto him in secret,
and said unto him ; Master, I believe that it is possible for me to
fulfil thy desires.
5. Nevertheless, the matter must be accomplished with great
caution, lest my brethren of the council should smell a rat.
6 [Now to smell a rat, being interpreted, is to suspect that a
thing is not according to Cocker.]
7. And it shall be in this wise.
3. That thou shalt take unto thyself the power of the Judges
of the Supreme Court.
9. And it shall come to pass that when thou desirest to make a
decision different from that of the Judges, that thou canst do so, and
no man shall say thee nay.
10. Then shall thy subjects fall down before thee, for they will
fear thy power, and will say among themselves ; Lo ! this man is as
mighty as Theodore, even Theodore the King of the Abyssinians.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 31
11. [Now the Judge of the Supreme Court whose surname was
Peter was absent from the Country for a season.] V
12. And the Governor said unto Thomas, Lo 1 is not Peter
absent from the Settlement — Wherefore then should we use such
caution.
13. Then Thomas answering, said : Because some of the Coun-
cil may think within themselves that thou desirest to grasp all the
power in thine own hands.
14. Then said the Chief Ruler ; Be it even as thou wilt.
15. When the next morning was come, the Council of the peo-
ple were summoned, and a parchment was placed before them.
16. And on the parchment was written that the Chief Ruler
should appoint the Judge, even such a man as he pleased.
17. Now this was written that the ends of Thomas and the
Chief Ruler might be encompassed.
18. For it was not deemed good in the eyes of Thomas that he
should speak at once what the Chief Ruler desired, but rather that
he should imitate Tahli Rand, the same of whom it is written that
he used language to conceal his meaning.
19. For Thomas knew in his heart that when thi3 power should
be given to the Chief Ruler, it would encompass all his designs.
20. For could not the Chief Ruler appoint that man who should
be after his own heart, and who would be his mouth-piece.
21. And was not Thomas himself after his own heart.
22. And was he not learned in the law, and might not he be
appointed of St. George to be the Judge.
23. But when the parchment was read, there arose a certain
learned Doctor of the Physic, whose name was Littlerubbut,*^even
the brother of Littlejohn^who was the companion of Hood whoso
surname was Robin.
24. And he smelt a rat and did speak against the parchment.
25. Then arose a Centurion even the Captain of the Volunteers,
and Tummusskot who were members of the Council, and they did
support Littlerubbut.
26. And there was great confusion.
27. Then said the Chief Ruler, Lo ! it is not I who ask this
thing, but another man avIio told me to do it, even the Sekreterry
of JStait.
28. And a certain Kling, which is of a black race, who run
about naked, and speak in a strange tongue, was standing at the
door of the Council Chamber.
82 LETTERS OP EXTINGUISHER.
29. And he opened his mouth and spoke after the manner of
his people saying, Arung gutheree a.
30. And the language was new unto the Chief Ruler.
31. Moreover he thought it was one of the Council who thus
spake.
32. And he was affrighted, and believed that the curse of Babel
was descending upon him and his Council.
83. And he broke up the Council in haste.
CHAPTER XIII.
1. Now Tummusskot and Littlerubbut and he who was the
Captain of the Volunteers, were of the members of the Council who
were non-official.
2. And, as has been said aforetime, the officials were those that
fished all they could out of the country, but the non-officials were
those that fished not, but who were called honorable, whether they
were or not.
3. And it pleased them.
4. For whether they walketh uprightly with clean hands and a
pure heart, or whether they lifted up their souls to vanity and
swore deceitfully, were they alike called honorable,
5. So they thought their sins were overlooked, and that they
might be admitted of St. Peter without being crossquestioned like
unto other men.
6. But on this occasion did they act honorably.
7- And when the people heard what had been proposed by the
Chief Ruler they were sick at heart, and said : Verily, the evil
spirit has not yet been cast out.
8. But the doings of the non-officials were applauded.
9. And the people gathered together, and supported the action
of the non-officials.
10. And when it came unto the ears of the Chief Ruler that
such a stir was made among the people, he called unto him Thomas,
and said unto him : Why hast thou led me to do this deed.
11. Lo I the people are again aroused against me ; yea, even as
one man do they upbraid me.
12. And Thomas answering said : Lo ! it is but a murmur even
as a sighing of the wind on the house-tops, but hath no substance.
13. And thou shalt see that a few feasts will dispel it.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 38
14. For man thinketh not evil upon a full belly toward hiin
that filled* it.
15. Make therefore a feast, and bid all them who have cried
against thee that they come unto it.
16. And there is a certain man who is a dealer in piece goods,
who thought that he should be called honorable, though he is not ;
and his heart is sore in that he is not bidden to the Council.
17. And he is a young man, and one of the chief against thee.
18. Let him I pray thee be boosted, into the Council.
19. Now to be boosted is in the language of the Yengeese to be
exalted.
20. But the Chief Ruler answering, said: Is it not written that
he who exalteth himself shall be abased, and does not this man
exalt himself — Yes, even in his nose doth his exaltation appear.
Therefore, I will not do this thing, but I will give a feast even as
thou advisest.
21. Then Thomas scratching his head, said: Master I have an
idea.
22. And the Chief Ruler answered : Speak it then quickly, lest
it depart from thee.
23. And Thomas answered, saying: Is it not true that the people
murmur because thou desirest to appoint Judges of the High Court.
24. And I say unto thee that it is because they fear that thou
wilt appoint for a Judge, one who knows not the duties of his office,
that they murmur against the degree.
25. Show unto them that they may look for a wise choice from
thee.
26. And behold even now canst thou do this, for doth not the
small court, even the Court of Requests lack a Judge.
27. Choose then a man well versed in law, and of experience
and place him upon the bench.
28. And the Chief Ruler said unto him: Thou hast spoken well.
28. Then the Chief Ruler cast about him to find such an one.
29. And after looking through his kindred he could find no
more brothers, so his choice fell upon his Cousins. X
30. And his Cousins was a writer in the office of him who cast
up accounts for the Chief Ruler.
31. And he was cunning in figures, but knew nought about law.
32. Moreover though his Cousins were a good boy, he was still
but a boy, and his years of discretion had not yet come unto him.
o3. But his Cousins obeyed the word of the Chief Ruler, and
he sat upon the bench.
34 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
34. And when the people did speak unto him and call him Your
Worship — as was the custom, he looked about him that he might
find unto whom they spake.
35. And finding no one, he discovered that it was even himself
unto whom they called.
36. And the Cousins of the Chief Ruler did pluck open the sleeve
o£ his vestment, and did thrust his head therein, and did laugh, for
he was but a boy and the title was new unto him.
37. And when the people did hear that the Chief Ruler had
used up his Brothers and appointed his Cousins, they said: Verily
the appointments c\ this man are all in the family way.
38. And they were more vexed than before.
CHAPTER XIV.
1. Now the time approached when the Legislative Council should
be closed for a season.
2. And it was commanded by the Chief Ruler that preparation
should be made for a great show, and that no expense should be
spared, lest any man should say that his possessions were burdened
with debt.
3. And he ordered the members of the Council that were official,
that they should buy all the gold lace that was in the shops of the
dealers in tinsel, and should sew it about their necks and about their
sleeves, and upon the hips of the garments that are called inex-
pressibles.
4. Also he commanded that the coverings of their heads should
be bound with tinsel and beads, and a feather placed therein.
5. And his commands were obeyed, and the Officials did stand
before him.
6. Then said he unto them ; Push out your stomachs, and gird
your inexpressibles tightly about your loins, and hold up your
heads that ye may look like unto men of war.
7. And ihey did so.
8. Then commanded he unto them that they should drill under
the eye of the centurion for seven days, that they might not forget
the dignity which their garments conferred upon them.
9. So when the morning was come in which the Council should
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 35
be dissolved, the Chief Ruler did call together the captains of his
armies and did send them with all their forces to the doors of the
Council Chamber.
10. And there was a mighty host like unto the sands of
the sea.
11. And about the first hour, it was noised abroad that the
Chief Ruler was approaching.
12. And immediately the gun^ of the mighty fortresses of his
dominions did belch forth flame and smoke, and the noise was like
unto the thunders of Heaven, so that nought else could be heard:
IS. And from the midst of the smoke came forth the Chief
Ruler, and his looks were as unruffled as the face of a horsepond on
a calm day, and no fear sat upon his brow.
14. Then said the people one to another, Lo ! this man is a true
soldier, for he walketh forth from the fire of these mighty guns, as
though theji were nought of which to be afraid.
15. And when he was come into the Council Chamber, he looked
about him that he might find his throne, but it had been left behind.
16. So he did sit himself down upon a chair, and the air was
rent with cheers at sight of this great condescension.
17. Then arose the Chief Ruler and spake unto the Council, and
said ! Nine months having passed, ye shall be released from labor.
18. But before ye depart from before my face, I would show
all those things unto you which I have accomplished during that
season.
19. For have I not reduced unto you the exorbitant demands
of the propellers of hackney carriages that have so long Klurig
about you.
20. And have I not passed a law by which those who are not
of our blood may be sent from among us.
21. Moreover, lest any man might say that I was unjust to-
ward these foreigners, have I made the act which is called the Pas-
senger Act that they may have comfort and health when they be
deported from among us.
22. Also I have altered the boundary line of the possessions of
the Rajah of Quedah. (Now to alter the boundary line is, as has
been said aforetime, " to colonise in the language of the men of
Jonbool, and in the tongue of the men of Unculsam to annex, and
in the vulgar tongue to rob land.)
23. These things have I accomplished and much more, and I
say unto ye that ye cannot have all these good things except by
paying for them.
36 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
24. Give me therefore wherewith I may furnish my palace with
floors of precious stone.
25. For it may not be said that your Chief Ruler treadeth up-
on the same common clay which is in the habitations of his
subjects.
2G. Therefore shall it be that every man shall lay by him in
store of his substance to be delivered unto my taxgatherers.
27. And it shall come to pass if this be not found sufficient for
me, that I will levy taxes upon merchants in foreign countries, who
send merchandise unto us.
28. And this shall be greatly to the advantage of my people,
for they shall then have many festivals, and shall not be overworked
as in these days.
29. For the dealers in foreign countries will send little of their
merchandise unto us when they learn of the taxes that shall be
imposed upon them for so doing.
30. Thus my subjects having little to sell, may bask in the sun
and climb greased poles all the year round.
31. Now at that time the people of the land climbed greased
poles only upon the first day of the year,
32. And when they heard that each day should be like unto the
first day of the year they did rejoice, and did give thanks unto the
Chief Ruler.
CHAPTER XV.
1. Among the possessions of the good Queen Victoria which
were presided over by Saint George, was Penang, which being-
interpreted is the Land of the Betelnuts.
2. And it was,goodly place, and had much commerce with the
Island of Singapore, and with the land of the men of Jonbool.
3. Now a mighty Company had been formed by some of the
men of Jonbool, and they owned much ships, which puffed forth
steam, and were propelled by huge pieces of iron which looked like
unto the fins of fishes.
4. And the name of this Company was the Peanho. X,
5. And their motto was a proud one, even Quis Separabit !
which being interpreted into the language of the men of Unculsam
(which is the same as the tongue of Jonbool, except that it is re-
fined and revised) meaneth, " Who can bust us ?"
t-^^sfUtZaj* t^t&t&i/ C^t^m^^
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 87
6. Now it was the custom of the ships of the Peanho, which did
sail between the land of Jonhool and the Far East, that they should
anchor at the shores of Penang to take the merchandise and the
parchments of the Merchants.
7. Moreover it was written in their contract with the Queen of
Jonbool that they should do thus.
8. And it came to pass that when the time of the contract drew
near unto its end, the Peanho congregated together and said among
themselves : Lo ! is not our motto a true one, for who in these ma-
ny years has been able to bust us ?
9. And we have gathered together much wealth, and have in-
creased the number of our ships, and our fame has spread abroad
even to the uttermost parts of the Earth,
10. Now shall we make a new contract with the Queen, and we
shall ask a much greater sum of money in return for carrying the
parchments of her subjects than we have had aforetime.
11. Moreover we will not stop at the land of the Betelnut, even
Penang.
12. And it shall be that when the men of Penang shall mur-
mur at this, then shall the Queen give us more money, and we
shall stop there as aforetime.
13. Moreover we will say that we be poor, and the cookers of
accounts shall make it appear even as we say.
14. And when the Queen and her Councillors believe that we
be poor, and that we have carried the merchandise and parchments
of her subjects only to oblige the Queen, then shall they have com-
passion on us.
15. Then cooked they their accounts and brought them unto
the Queen, and it came to pass even as they had said.
16. And the Company of the Peanho with one accord put their
forefinger on the side of the nose, and said, Walker ! !
17. For this is among the customs of the men of Jonbool when
they have taken in their brother, or when they cannot themselves
be taken in.
18. Now when the news of this thing came unto the ears of
the men of Penang, they were eore troubled, and said among them-
selves: If this thing be true, and nothing be done for us, then we
be ruined. And a loud cry went up from among them, because
that they were cut off from their friends.
19. And they met together that they might petition the Queen
that she should help them in their affliction.
20. But there were many thousand leagues between them and
38 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
their Queen, and they cast about to devise how they should send
their parchments to Singapura in the meantime.
21. For the Vessels of the Peanho did stop at Singapura, and
would take their parchments and merchandise thence to their kins-
men in the land of Jonbool.
22. And while they were talking, it remembered them that the
Chief Ruler, had promised that the steamer which his subjects
had bought for him, even the Peiho, should be of much use to them
in time of need.
23. Then felt they easy in their minds, for they felt assured
that Saint George, the Chief Ruler, would send the Peiho to and
fro between Penang and Singapura until they should hear from
their Queen.
24. Now the time approached for the departure of the Peanho
from Singapura.
25. And it was about this time that the Peiho came from Sin-
gapura, and the Merchants of Penang were glad when she came in
sight, and said: Truly our Chief Ruler is a good man sometimes:
now shall we be able to write unto our kinsfolk.
26. Then ran they to their houses that they might write their
parchments, and answer those that they had received from Sin-
gapura.
27. Afid when they had written, they took their parchments in
their hands, and went to the sea -side that they might send them in
the Peiho.
28. But when they had come unto the Sea- side, they found
she had departed.
29. So they rent their clothes with grief, yet murmured they
not, for they said: Surely there must be some grievous matter of
State to cause all this haste.
30. And it came to pass that as soon as the Peiho had reached
Singapura, the Chief Ruler rushed on board with his gun.
31. For it had been arranged that the Peiho should return from
Penang with all haste that the Chief Ruler and his followers might
join in a hunt after wild beasts, in the territory of a neighbouring
Prince.
32. And the Chief Ruler took with him some of his Council,
that he might not be blamed of them in the matter.
33. Moreover, he said : Can I not say that it is necessary that
I make merry with the neighbouring Rulers that there be peace
and kind feeling between us.
34. And this will be believed by the Queen, for she knows nor,
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 39
the simplicity of the Malay Princes.
35. So Saint George and his band of mighty hunters departed in
the Peiho.
36. And they took with them another steamer called the Rain-
bow, that they might place therein the wild beasts and game that
they should slay.
37. And when they came unto Johore, which lieth over against
Singapura, they went down from their ships to the shore.
38. And every man took with him his gun, and his spear and
his bowie knife.
39. Then they hunted.
40. And after that, they hunted some more.
41. And it came to pass that after several days had passed, one
of the number who was of the household of the Governor, shot a
mighty boar.
42. And when the news came unto the ears of Saint George, he
went to gaze upon the boar.
43. And he lifted up his voice and praised him who had done
the deed.
44. And he promised unto him that he should have the Star of
India.
45. And while he thus spoke, a woman came running towards
him, even a woman of the Toh-Peh-Kongs.
46. And she threw herself upon the body of the boar, and rent
her clothes, crying, '"Anibui! Ini babi sahya anain tahun sudah pi-
liara,*' which being interpreted meaneth : Alas! this is my pig which
I have kept for six years.
47. And when the Governor heard this he felt queer, and said
unto his followers; Let us return unto our own country.
48. And straightway they returned in the Peiho.
49. But the body of the Pig came in the Rainbow.
50. And when the people of Penang did hear of these things they
assembled themselves together, and said among themselves: "What
manner of Governor is this that he should cut lis off from our kins-
folk and waste our substance, that he and his household should shoot
a tame pig."
CHAPTER XVI.
1. Now the Bill which was written by Thomas, even the Su-
preme Court Bill, did come before the Council.
40 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
2. And it was opposed by the non-officials, even Tummuskot
and Littlerubbut, and he who was the Captain of the Host.
3. Also the Chief Justice did inveigh against it.
4. But their voices were powerless.
5. For when the Chief Ruler did say that it was his wish that
any law should be passed, the officials or echoes did say likewise.
6. And the Governor's echoes were to the non- officials even as
three to one, so that the Governor and his echoes had their will in
all things.
7. Now one of the echoes was the Centurion of a regiment, who
could say to his men, go and they went, and come and they came,
and he was troubled with a conscience.
8. And he had agreed with the non-officials, and had spoken
against this Bill.
9. But it came to pass that on the day when the vote was cast
his place knew him not.
10. So the Chief Ruler prevailed and the Bill was made law.
11. Now when the people did see what was done of the Gover-
nor and his echoes, and that the power of the Chief Justice should
be taken from him and usurped by the Governor, they were sore
troubled.
12. And some among them proposed that they should assemble
the people together, that they might speak their minds openly on
this thing.
13. And about the third hour of the evening, the people did
come together at the Town Hall.
14. And it was filled even to overflowing.
15. Then came Andrew, a money changer from the Temple,
into the midst of the Assembly.
16. And he opened his mouth and spake unto the people. And
his speech was full of wisdom, and he shewed unto the people the
iniquity and mischief of the new law.
17. Moreover he did shew unto them the words which had been
spoken aforetime, on this same matter by some among the great and
wise men of the nation, even Darby and Grey.
18. And all the Assembly with one accord, being pleased with
the words of the money-changer, did shout — Taurus y pro vobis,
which being interpreted, meaneth — " Bully for you."
19. After Andrew had ceased speaking, arose Hatchsoon, he of
whom it is written " that coming events cast their shadows before,"
and his words were those of eloquence, and did carry conviction to
the people.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 41
20. And many others did speak. And they were all of one
mind.
21. Then made they a record of their speeches, and did send
them to their Queen, even Victoria of the land of Jonbool.
22. And they prayed that she would give ear unto their prayer,
and prevent these designs of the Chief Ruler.
CHAPTER XVII.
1. And it came to pass that the Captain of the Malachites, who
also was Lieutenant to the Chief Ruler of Singapura did fall sick,
2. And when the physicians had consulted with one another,
they agreed that he must depart from their coast, unto the land of
his fathers even unto the country of the men of Jonbool.
3. Now one among their number who was a Gaul did say that
he was possessed of a foy gras.
4. And it was acknowledged among the Doctors that when a
man was afflicted with a foy gras he must seek for a cool clime.
5. So he departed.
6. And when he had gone from among his people, it was need-
ful that the Chief Ruler should seek another Captain for the Ma-
lachites.
7. And it came to pass that while he was thus searching, he
chanced to read the words of one of the Saints, even Paul.
8. And in the 12th letter of Paul unto the Romans, he came
upon these words : Be kindly affectioned one to another with
brotherly love; in honour preferring one another.
9. Then said the Chief Ruler unto himself: Lo ! this is a place
of honour, therefore will I prefer my Brother, as is commanded by
this good man of old.
10. And straightway he appointed his Brother.
11. And there arose a murmur among the old lieutenants be-
cause of this act, for many of them had served among the natives
of the land for many years, and were learned in their laws and
customs and language, and they said : Shall this man be preferred
before us who have borne the burden and heat of the day, while
he has come amongst us at the eleventh hour. Lo ! see what it is
to be the kinsman of a great Ruler.
12. But the Chief Ruler answered, " Can I not do what I will
with my own?"
13. So he had his way even unto the seven and seventieth time.
42 CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE.
CHAPTER XVIII.
1. Now in these days there came a mighty vessel unto the coast
of St. George.
2. And she had on board many valiant fighting men, and much
munition of war and many guns.
3. And her name was the Perseus.
4. Now for a long time she lay quietly in the harbour of Sin-
gapura.
5. There were among the crew many men which were called
Paddees, which are from the land of Ouldarin.
6. And it was among* their chief customs to play tunes on the
heads of their friends with sticks, which were called Shillaleys.
7. And when their own heads were bruised, they dearly loved
him who had injured them.
8. Moreover, if there were strength left unto them to do so,
they turned the other side, as is commanded.
\K Therefore were they Christians.
10. And it came to pass that these men waxed tired of a life of
peace, and said among themselves ; Lo ! We be spilin' for a fight.
Whey tarry we here wid none to tread on the tails av oor coats.
11. And when the Captain of the Perseus did hear these word*,
he went unto the Chief Ruler, and said unto him,
12. The Paddees that be with me are vexed with the quietnes*
of their life. Give me then some work for them.
13 And St. George answering said ; We be at peace with all our
neighbours, therefore can I give you no battle to do.
14. Nevertheless tarry not here, but take thy vessel out to
sea, lest they Paddees do come on shore and smite me and my
subjects.
15. Lo ! I will give thee a letter to Sarah whack who liveth not
many days journey from this.
16. And he gave him the letter, and ordered him that he should
depart from his coast for a season.
17. Now it was about this time that the Peanho should have
come from home, with parchments from the kindred of them which
dwelt in Singapura.
18. And it was the custom of the Peanho, when she came unto
Singapura during the night, that she should fire a gun, and send up
a rocket.
19. Now about the eleventh hour, when darkness covered the
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 43
face of the earth, and only wickedness stalked abroad, a gun was
fired.
20. Then the people sprang from their beds, and ran to the
sea-side.
21. And when they were come there, they saw the rocket.
22. And they looked steadfastly at it, and, some among their
number said, ou-ou-ou as is the custom when a rocket goes up.
23. And while they gazed, the rocket burst into a cluster of
stars. And one among the people who was an astronomer said
unto them,
24. It is given unto me to read the stars, and I will tell ye
what is written in these.
25. And he read : Lo ! I Stevens, depart.
2G. Now this was the name of the Captain of the Perseus.
27. And it was desired of him that every one should know that
he was going.
28. And when the people saw what was done nnto them, they
did bless Stevens.
29. And they went their way homeward, and told their wives
what had happened. And they blessed him likewise.
CHAPTER XIX.
1. Now it came to pass that the Chief Ruler waxed tired of his
dull life.
2. So he cast about to find what would amuse him. And lo !
there was nothing.
3. Then said one of his Evil Counsellors unto him. Has not
my master the yacht called the Peiho, and is it not at his command.
Why then shall he trouble himself to seek distraction in this be-
nighted place.
4. For are there not many lands that St. George, our Master,
has not yet seen?
5. And if it seemeth good unto our Master, what hinders that
he shall visit the land of Siam, which is a land flowing with rice
and ivory, whose King is wise and learned as Solomon of old.
Moreover this King is famed in that he has given many rare and
costly presents unto those who have visited him.
6. And the Chief Ruler answering said : All that thou hast spo-
ken seemeth good unto me : nevertheless it is written in the laws of
44 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
Victoria : " Thou shalt not leave our possessions to visit those of
any other ruler unless leave be granted unto thee so to do."
7. Then answered the Counsellor, saying ; Lo ! shall this stand
in the way of St. George, our master, who has given power unto
himself, even power greater than that of Victoria herself, w
8. For can he not suspend the Chief Judge without trial'. And
can he not with a wave of his hand send all those who are not na-
turals out of his possessions ; Why then should the laws of a wo-
man, who has less power than his own, stand in his way ?
9. After these words, the Chief Ruler was puffed up, and he
felt the dignity of his position.
10. So he sent orders unto the Captain of the Peiho that he
should make ready the vessel, that he might visit the land of
Siam.
11. And the Captain answered him saying; Where shall I go
for my coals that I may make steam, for I have no money, and it
will cost above two thousand pieces of silver for these.
12. Then answered the Chief Ruler ; I will tell unto the Keeper
of the Treasury, that he shall furnish the dibs, and unto t^ Audi-
tor, that it shall be Avritten against the expenses which are called
Special, and this charge shall come from the pockets of the people.
13. So it was done even as he had commanded.
14. And in the morning the Chief Ruler went on board the
Peiho.
15. And he took with him a Cockatoo, two monkeys, an Aide-
de-Camp, and a parrot, besides other animals.
16. And he sailed.
17. And it came to pass that the third day after he had departed,
a sudden darkness spread over the Earth in the midst of the day.
18. And the people, alarmed, ran in every direction, shouting :
What is this that has come upon us ?
19. Lo litis early in the day, yet the darkness of night is
about us.
20. And some among them looked into the firmament of hea-
ven and saw that the Sun had hidden his face with a black mask.
21. And the people stood aghast and said one to another : Lo!
is the Sun hiding his face from us in sorrow at this new fault of
the Chief Ruler.
22. But one among them who was a wise man, answered them
saying : It is not as ye think ! Ye fools ! ye have yet to learn the
power of this man who can suspend Judges and deport Unnaturals.
Know ye then that -power over the Sun is given unto St. George
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 45
even like unto that of Joshua of old, and St. George has command-
ed that a portion of the Sun's light be hidden from you until his
return.
23. Then said the people one unto another : What next ?
CHAPTER XX.
1. Now about this time there arose a howl in the land of the
Betelnuts, which made itself heard even unto the coast of Singapura.
2. And the people of Singapura did enquire the cause of the
complaint.
3. And it was told unto them that the howl came from the
mouths of the Sons of Confucius, which as has been said aforetime,
were like unto other men, save that they had tails.
4. And they were a hard working and persevering race, and
they had done more than any other people to increase the wealth of
Singapi^a, and of the islands round about.
5. And it was found that in sixty days, more than two thousand
of the Sons of Confucius had departed from the land.
6. And one among them being questioned, Avherefore he had
left the land of the Betelnuts, answered, saying: Lo ! a new Ruler
has come among us, and he has built himself a palace, and bought
ships, and expended much treasure ; and he has laid heavy taxes
upon us that he might do all these things ; and the land groans
under these burdens.
7. Moreover we must pay ten pieces of silver, even ten Mexi-
cans to be buried, after we be dead.
8. And if one of us dies, and ten Mexicans be not found in his
pocket, then can his friends not follow to the tomb to pray for him,
but he must be cast into utter darkness.
9. Moreover we be told that it is good for us to be made na-
turals, that we may have the protection of the Chief Ruler. But
for this we must pay even live and twenty Mexicans.
10. And after that I was naturalized, I found that I had not
money enough to bury myself.
11. And I feared for the welfare of my soul.
12. So I determined to depart out of the land.
13. And many others agreed to do likewise.
14. And it came to pass that when we were about to go forth,
we did ask for a passport.
46 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
15. Then were five more pieces of silver demanded from each
of us.
16. And I say unto you. that if these burdens be not taken off.
the land will be stripped of its inhabitants, and its wealth will now
into the possessions of other Eulers.
17. And if we be rich and able to pay these taxes, still is there
no security for us.
18. For if an envious man go before the Chief Ruler and bear
false witness against us, then can the Chief Ruler order us that we
depart out of the land even without a hearing.
19. Neither will time be given us to collect our goods and our
money.
20. Is it not better therefore that we depart in any case, until
such time as wise and good laws be passed for our protection ?
CHAPTER XXI.
1 . Now the Chief Ruler and his echoes did pass so many new
laws that many of them were forgotten by his servants, even those
who were called Government Officials.
2. And from morning till night was he writing messages to the
Officials, and summoning them before him to his palace, that he
might remind them of these laws.
3. And he used up much paper in writing.
4. Moreover there were many of the Officials that were called
Convicts, that were used up in carrying these parchments.
5. So the Chief Ruler called unto him his evil Counsellors, and
confided unto them this new trouble.
6. And one of them who was a Scot, from the land where they
squeeze music from bags with their arms, and rub themselves
against posts which are planted by the Dukes of Argyle, and who
moreover are very sharp-witted, answered : Master, I ken a way in
which thy vexation may be removed.
7. For oft-time when rubbing myself against the posts in my
native land have I seen iron wires running from one post unto
another.
8. And when I enquired of what use they were, I was told that
they were to talk with :
9. And if a man passed his lingers over the keys to which thes
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 47
wires were attached, his thoughts might be known in a second, at
a marvellous distance.
10. Moreover there is a wise man even now in Singapura who
can teach our Master this knowledge.
11. And such grave matters of State oft- time arise, and the
tract of country over which our Master rules is so immense, that it
would be the work of ten common men to write what is necessary
unto his servants the officials.
12. And even is it the labor of two men's hands like unto our
Master.
13. But with the wires can our Master do all.
14. And the words of the Scot found favor in the sight of the
Chief Ruler.
15. Then sent he the'Scot, and called unto him the man who
was cunning in wire.
16. And he ordered him that he should put up posts even like
unto those of the Dukes of Argyle, and wires to connect his palace
with the legs of his servants, the Officials.
17. And it was done, even as he commanded.
18. Then was the Chief Ruler instructed in its use.
19. Moreover there were sharp stakes planted about the posts
that the Scot might not rub his back against them and destroy
them.
20. And the Chief Ruler did sit down in front of the keys
which were fastened unto the wires
21. And he played upon them with his fingers.
22. And as he played, straightway some of the Officials would
spring up before him.
23. And it amused the Chief Ruler, so that he laiighed till the
tears ran down his cheeks.
24. But the Echos, even the Government Officials laughed not,
for they grew thin with their running, and had but little time to
eat :
25. And they lifted up their voices and cried aloud : Alas !
was it not better as it was of old, when our brothers the Convicts
were used up, for now have we no moment of peace.
26. But the people rejoiced, for they said: Lo 1 now is the Chief
Ruler destroying his Echos, and it will come to pass that when
He has done this His voice will not be so loud in the land.
48 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
CHAPTER XXII.
Concerning Gam Beer. ^
1. Now in the days of St. George there arose a cry in the land
of Singapura, because of the dishonesty of some among the sons of
Confucius.
2. For it was found that many of them did give thistles where
they had bargained to give figs, and thorns after they received mo-
ney for grapes.
o. Moreover they did mingle worthless stuff in much other of
their merchandise.
4. And when they did sell injarubba, they did soak it in water,
and did sell the water for the same price as the injarubba.
5. Nevertheless the merchants did receive it, and did pay the
price that was asked, blaminp; no one.
6. Therefore were they thieves like unto the sons of Confucius.
7. For is it not written that those who receive are like unto the
thieves themselves?
tf. But there were among the merchants from Europe, some
good men who looked upon the matter in this way.
9. And they met together at the Chamber of Comus, and did
swear a solemn vow that they would no longer be thieves.
10. And they did write a petition unto St. George, the Chief
Ruler, that he would make a law to punish these wicked men.
11. But they did ask that this law should punish only those
who dealt wickedly in Gam Beer.
12. And this Gam Beer was in very much request in Singapura
and did grow in Singapura and in the country round about.
13. Rut the merchants who were of the Chamber of Comus, did
not ask protection against the wiles of the injarubba thieves.
14. For they said : It is only for forriners and men of the land
of Unculsam that this merchandise is bought.
15. And the men of the land of Unculsam can take care of
themselves.
16. So it was that the men of the Chamber of Comus did ask
protection against the Gam Beer thieves alone.
17. Then was the law for the punishment of these wicked men
written out by order of the Chief Ruler.
18. And it was sent unto the Council that it might be made law
or refused, even as it pleased the Council.
19. And it came to pass that at the eleventh hour when this
<*^~ ~ <^e-c_~-*^U ^fer
CHHONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. i\)
wise law should have been passed, there arose one of the Council
who did speak against it.
20. And he did bring forward a parchment that was signed
by many of the merchants themselves.
21. And in the body of the parchment, these merchants did say
that they had not been cheated enough.
22. And many of the Sons of Confucius had also signed it, for
they said: We will act kindly unto these men, for do they not
ask of us that we will still impose upon them ?
23. And the parchment did also object to the law that was de-
sired, in that it would interfere with Free Trade, which name was
a war-cry among them.
24. For they said : Is it not Free Trade to impose upon our
Brother in any manner that we can?
25. And is it not also Free Trade to place mud in our Opium,
and to call it all Opium, and to receive the value of pure Opium if
our Brother will believe our word ?
26. And we will sell our brass for gold, and our chaff for wheat.
27. For is not this what is call Free Trade among us?
28. So when the Governor saw that they desired what they call-
ed Free Trade, he did say, Let them be cheated, since they desire it.
29. And one among the merchants who desired not this kind of
Free Trade, did write long and wise letters in the papers.
SO. And the front name of this merchant who was a Scott was
William. V
81. Therefore is he called Gam Beer Bill even unto this day.
32. And the Free Traders after that they had succeeded, went
about seeking what they might devour.
CHAPTER XXIII.
1. Now the Chief Ruler did depart for a season unto the Island
of the Betelnuts.
2. And all his household did go likewise.
3. Then the people of Singapura did rejoice, for they said one
unto another: Now shall we have no more vexatious laws for the
present, and peace and quietness shall again dwell among us.
4. But they reckoned without their host.
5. And it was in this wise.
/
50 LETTERS or EXTINGUISH Li,'.
6. A new Chief Priest had been sent unto the people of Shiga -
pura, to serve in the Temple.
7. And it came unto the ears of the Chief Priest that there was
murmuring among much of the people because of the hour of the
evening sacrifice.
8. For many of them did dwell in the houses of publicans.
9. And the time of the evening meal was at the seventh hour.
10. Moreover this was the hour which had been set apart for
the evening sacrifice at the Temple.
11. So there were many good men who were absent from the
Temple at this service, for otherwise would they havn gone to their
rest without nourishment.
12. And when the Chief Priest did see this thing, he was sore
troubled.
13. And lie said: Verily, my people shall not have this excuse
before the Lord.
11. So he changed the time for the evening sacrifice unto the
Sixth hour.
15. That so the people might pray without fasting save on those
days for which fasting was ordained of the Church.
16. And the people xv9t pleased because of this good deed.
17. But when the Chief Jiuler did hear of it, he was wroth.
18. And he did revile the Chief Priest in that he had dared to
change the hour of the evening sacrifice without permission of his
Holiness,
19. For, he said: Am I not the head of the Church, as well as
of the State?
20. And have I not ordered the evening feast on the Sabbath,
at my palace, for the eighth hour ?
21. And shall I alter my hour to please those of my minions
who eat with publicans and sinners ?
22. So he did send a messenger from the island of the Betelnuts.
23. And he did command that the hour of the evening sacrifice
\ye again as aforetime.
24. Then was the Chief Priest amazed.
25. For he had been but a short season in the coasts of
Singapura.
2<l. But the people were not amazed, for they said : Surely the
evil spirit has entered into this man yet one more time : Can it not
be cast out?
chronicles of st. george. 51
Ye acthour remonstrates and moralises.
1. Why are the men of Singapura stirred up because of the
deeds of the Chief Ruler?
2. And why are they disquieted because of his unjust doings?
?>. And who set them up to be the judges over him?
4. His acts may be right in his own sight, yet wrong in the eyes
of the congregation of the wicked.
5. For if we go into the land of the Cannibals, shall we not find
the men thereof eating their fellow-men ?
6. And though this be an abomination in the sight of men of
different habits, yet be the Cannibals true to their instincts.
7. Likewise is it with the Chief Ruler.
8. Though all men speak of him that he doeth unwise things,
yet verily do I believe that he is unto the manner born.
9. Therefore acteth he according unto his instincts, and is not
responsible unto his minions.
10. And if he doeth right in his own eyes, are his acts not
therefore righteous ?
Copy of Petition lately presented to His Highness.
The undersigned, who dwell in the Hotels and Boarding Houses
of Singapore, and who believe in the divine right of Governors to
do all that which seemeth good unto them, do hereby implore the
attention of His Mightiness to the utter want of respect shown by
the Hotel Keepers to his evening service edict, and the necessities
imposed thereby.
So far as your humble Petitioners' knowledge extends, the hour
of dining has not been changed at any Hotel or lodging house to
meet your Majesty's views with regard to the proper hour for even-
ing prayer, and your Petitioners view this rebellious spirit of the
Publicans with horror and disgust.
AVe therefore humbly beg that your Majesty will issue an order
to these Publicans which cannot be misunderstood, threatening
them with heavy penalties in case dinner is ready before eight
o'clock on Sunday evening.
And your prostrate Petitioners will ever pray — at any hour that
your Majesty pleases.
(Signed)
Extinguisher
AND 347 OTHERS.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 53
BOOK II.
CHAPTER I.
1 Now not long after this act of the Governor against the Chief
Priest had been accomplished, he returned unto the Coast of Sin-
gapura.
2. And as he drew nigh unto the Coast, the Peiho, even the
Steamer which conveyed him, did signal unto the shore.
3. Now this was about the Seventh hour of the morning.
4. And the signal did call the Goverment Officials unto the
shore that they might receive his Highness.
5. Then obeyed the Officials the signal.
6. And immediately there were congregated on the shore, the
Chief scribe, and the Captain of the host, the Water Carrier of his
Highness and the Chief Cooker of accounts, beside many other
Officials.
7. And after that they had remained there for a long period
they began to feel anhungered and atliirst, and they said one unto
another, Lo ! some evil must have befallen the Peiho, for she ap-
proacheth not the shore.
8. And they waited yet another hour until the sun was high in
the heavens, and yet be came not.
9. Then began they to feel faint, for it was long past the hour
for the morning repast.
10. Yet none among them departed, for they feared the anger
of his Excellent;}'.
11. Then began they to swear.
12. And about the hour of midday the vessel of the Chief Ru-
ler came unto the shore.
13. And the Officials did rush on board the vessel, and did
greet his Highness with words of affection.
14. Then said the chief scribe unto him, " I greet thee even
as the bridegroom greets the bride, for now shall we feast. Lo I we
have waited for thee since the seventh hour, and we be well nigh
famished."
15. Then answered the Chief Ruler, and said unto him, M Get
thee hence, thou wicked servant. Is not a sight of my face a suf-
ficient recompense unto thee ?
16. " It was with this belief that I have tarried so long in the
54 LETTERS QF EXTINGUISHER.
Qffing, for I might have arrived here three hours since, but I sailed
outside that I might have my morning meal in peace."
17. So the Chief Ruler offered unto the Officials no food, and
after that they had begged a crust of beard and a glass of wine
from the Chief of the Tanjong Pagar Dock, they departed murmur-
ing each man unto his own home.
CHAPTER II.
1. And it came to pass that one among the honorables who
was a non-official desired to give up his place in the Council.
2. And when this was made known unto the Chief Ruler, he
called untojiim Thomas, and said unto him :
I 3. Lo ! xow can I make myself still stronger in the Council.
I. For mhe shall go out among the dealers in merchandise, and
shalt choose from amonc them, one who will bind himself to act
like unto the officials.
5. And it shall be that when I say yea, he also shall say yea,
and when I say n\y, that shall he echo.
6 And thou shalt promise unto the man of thy choice that if
he will do this thing, hearing with mine ears, seeing with mine
eyes, and placing his nose in my hands that he may be led by it,
that he shall be called honorable among his fellow-men.
7. Then went Thomas out to do as he was commanded.
8. And he called unto him William the Son of Adam, and
offered to make him honourable if he would act according unto the
words of the Chief Ruler.
9. But when William heard that he was to sell his conscience,
lie would not.
10. For he was a just man.
II. Moreover he had invested largely in Straits Produce.
12. Then went Thomas unto Gambier Bill.
13. But neither would he sell himself for so small a price.
14. Also unto one of the Pahdees, even one of those who come
from the land of Oald Arin, did he offer the place. But Thomas
was likewise rebuked of the Pahdee.
15. Now when these things were noised abroad, the people were
indignant, and said one unto another,
16. " Behold the Chief Ruler thinketh to make even non-offi-
cials his echoes: Hath he not voice enough already, that he should
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGF. 55
try to make some among us barter the independence of their thoughts?
and even their truth for an empty title ? "
17. And one among the people, who was of a weak understand-
ing, said, Lo ! is this not bribery and corruption ?
18. But the multitude laughed him to scorn, for they said: Is
it not written that " the King can do no wrong ; and is it not the
same with our Chief Ruler who hath power even greater than that
of a King?"
19. Now when Thomas saw that none among the chief men
would sell himself, he returned unto his master and told him all
these things.
29. Then said the Chief Ruler,
21. Cast these wicked servants into outer darkness, and seek
among the poor, the halt, the blind and the haif-witted, for such an
one as I desire.
22. And the people waited impatiently to see who among them
was the half-witted one.
V7
CHAPTER III.
1. Now the Chief Ruler was a generous man, for he stinted not
of the money of his subjects.
2. And the people had given him one hundred thousand shekels
of silver that he might build unto himself a palace.
3. And some of the Government Officials, even the Convicts,
had labored upon it for many months, and it approached completion.
4. Then went the Chief Ruler to gaze upon the work, and, when
he had looked, he said : Lo! I have used up the money that was
given of my subjects and I have none wherewith to build a place
for my oxen and asses,
5. Then called he his chief workman, even him who was called
Makan Angin. y
0. And he asked of him how much would be required for this
work.
7. Then answered Makan Angin. — Perad venture I shall require
forty thousand shekels of silver over and above what thy subjects
have already given thee.
8. And when the Chief Ruler heard this, he called unto him
the Council and said unto them.
9. Mine honorable subjects, I have called you into my presence
that I might sneak with you regarding my palace : And aforetime
T>(> LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
I did tell you tliat one hundred thousand shekels of silver would
pay its cost, and I did approximate very nearly unto the amount
required, but the houses for my oxen and asses were forgotten of me.
10. Now it shall be that you will grant more money for this
good work, even forty thousand shekels of silver more than you
have already given unto me.
11. ThenansweredoneoftheCounc.il, and said; We thought
that the asses were to live in the palace, — but since we are wrong,
and haw no choice in the matter, we give the money unto thee.
12. Now it came to pass that news was sent ro the Chief Rule*
that a Juke, even the son of the good Queen Victoria, would arrive
on the coast in the ninth month.
13. And it was a custom of the country that when the Queen's
Sons were received with magnificence by any of her Governors, that
they should be rewarded.
14. And the Chief Ruler wished that it might be so with him.
15. And he said unto himse'f : Behold I will have my Palace
finished in splendour before the coming of the Jv.ke.
16. Moreover I will command my subjects that they give me
wherewithal I may make great feasts for his reception, that so I
may be rewarded of the Queen.
17. Then called he unto him the Chief workman, even Makan
An gin, who was also a courtier and an echo, and had always been
led by the nose.
18. And the Chief Ruler commanded him, saying ; See that my
palace is finished by the ninth month, for at that time cometh the
Queen's Son.
19. But Makan Angin answered him saying; Master, it cannot
be done.
20. Then was the Chief Ruler wroth, and said : Behold now it
shall be that if my palace be not finished at the time of the coming
of the Juke, then shalt thou lose thy head.
21. Then laughed Makan Angin in the sleeve of his garment,
for he knew that it would be but a small loss.
22. And immediately the Spirit, Bak Bone, entered into him
and dwelt there.
23. And he defied the Chief Ruler.
24. Then was the Chief Ruler vexed in that he must for his
honour cut off the head of his best echo,
25. For until this time had Makan Angin no ideas but those of
the Chief Ruler, and the words that he spoke unto his master had
been soft and honeyed even like those of a maid unto her chosen.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 57
CHAPTER IV.
1. Now in the sight of nien, the paths of the Chief Ruler were
righteous.
2. For he went unto the tabernacle twice on the Sabbath, to
offer sacrifice.
3. Likewise also was it with Makan Angiu.
4. And it was among their vows to the Lord on each Sabbath,
that thoy would do no work on that day, neither themselves, nor
their servants nor their maids, nor their oxen, nor their asses, nor
anything that was under their control.
5. But it came to pass that a few days after the spirit Bak
Bone had entered into Makan Angin, it again left him.
6. And he went unto the Chief Ruler and said unto him : " Lo !
my master commanded of me that I should build up the Palace of
Saint George ere the ninth month should be accomplished, that
so the Juke might enter in at its gate, and dwell in splendour.
7. And were it in man's power to accomplish this work it
should be done even as thou hast commanded.
8. Have pity then upon thy servant, and shoAv unto him how
he may do thy will.
9. Then answered the Chief Ruler unto him, saying: Thou
hast spoken well, and thy head is saved unto thee. Hearken now
unto my words.
10. Between this and the end of the ninth month there be
many Sabbaths, even twenty and four.
11. Behold then it shall be that the artificers in wood and in
stone, even those with whom thou hast contracted, shall work on
those days.
12. But with the Convicts shall be no work, for they be
Government Officials.
13. And it shall be that when the people see that the contrac-
tors alone do work that they shall say, They do it of their own
will. — Behold ! the Chief Ruler is in the straight path, and res-
trained the Convicts from working on the Lord's day.
14. This shalt thou do, that so my palace may be finished for
the reception of the Juke.
15. Then Makan Angin, willing to walk in the right path, if
there were nothing unpleasant by the wayside, answered the Chief
Ruler and said: But master, is it not commanded that we permit
not even our asses to work on the Sabbath day !
58 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
16. Then said the Chief Ruler, Verily, thou speakest gospel ;
therefore it shall be that thou shalt do no work on the Sabbath.
17. Then sought Makan Angin for the Spirit, Bak Bone, but
he found him not.
18. So he went out from the Chief Ruler's presence, and did as
he was commanded.
19. But when the people saw what was done of the Chief Ruler,
they said one unto another. —Behold now the Chief Ruler break -
eth even the commandments of the Lord that so he majr be glorified
on earth and that the Juke may have "gas and bells '*>when he
visiteth our coast. ^
CHAPTER V.
I. Now on the 24th of the fifth month came the feast of the
birth of the Queen of the Land of Jonbool.
'2. And it was customary on that day that the Rulers of all the
possessions of the Queen should give a feast unto her people.
3. And thus had it been aforetime in the island of Singapore.
4. But the Chief Ruler had spent much wealth that he might
build unto himself a palace and some beautiful ships which should
be a pride unto the people.
5. Moreover was he thrifty, and had asked of the Queen that
she should give unto him more money for entertaining of her peo-
ple in Singapura ; for they drank much.
6. And this increase had not yet been allowed unto him, so
that his pay was not even much more than that given unto the
President of the land of Unculsam.
7. So he was wise and said unto himself: Is it not better that
I should save the money for this feast, and do good with it in pri-
vate?
8. Perhaps also I may astonish my people by giving a cup to
be run for by the horses of Singapura out of this money.
0. This then will 1 do :
10. As the day approach for the feast of the Queen, 1 will go
on board my vessel of war and will sail unto the shores of Djawa,
even unto the land of the Dutchman which floweth with schnapps
and with A. V. H. -f
II. And when I be come unto the coast, and it be known that
one of the Rulers of the Queen of Jonbool approaches, then shall
it be that the mighty guns shall belch forth tire and smoke, and all
^HC &U*L jfafr~&4i4 ^w^Cq £r4J*JL *v*Al
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 50
the men of war, both horse and foot, shall come out to greet me.
12. Then shall St. George and his power be known of the
Dutchmen.
13. And I shall be waited upon by their Chief Ruler, and
great honor shall be done unto me.
14. For have I not received my guests in this manner, even the
Chief Ruler of Manila, and the Admirals of the French and the
Austrians and the Americans ?
15. And did I not invite the Austrian Admiral unto a feast,
unto which he would have come had it not been for that " sun-
stroke," whereby he was forced to send a boy in his stead ?
16. Thus then shall St. George gain honor among the nations
about him, and save money for the races.
17. Then set he about to prepare that he might make much dis-
play among the Dutchmen.
18. And he called unto him the Captain of one of the Queen's
ships of war, and demanded of him that he should make ready his
vessel, and accompany the Peilto unto Djawa.
19. And the name of the war ship of the Queen was the
liinaldo,
20. Then the Captain of the Itiaaldo answered him saying : It
is not of my duties to do this thing, therefore must I refuse you.
21. Then spoke the Chief Ruler and said : It is among thy or-
ders that thou Convoy the Chief Ruler of a province whithersoever
he may desire thee :
22. But the Captain said : If an were an E, then wouldest
thou be right, but the order of the Queen readest not Convoy but
Convey.
23. Then was the Chief Ruler vexed in that he could not pro-
ceed in two ships.
21. For his importance was too great to be held in one ship.
25. Nevertheless he bowed to necessity and the Captain, for he
remembered him of the cost of the feast.
2G. Yet tried he still another time, Saying : Thou art but a
Captain, liinaldo, and can I not command thee, seeing that I fly an
Admiral's pennant at the mast head of my yacht ?
27. But liinaldo, knowing his duty, answered him saying:
Assuredly thou fliest an Admiral's pennant at the mast head of
thy Peilio, yet if I did my duty I should proceed on board and tear
down thy flag, for thou hast no right to it.
28. Moreover the judges should mulct thee in five hundred
shekels sterling. .
& *£. */-
60 LETTEKS 01 EXttKGUlSHEE.
29. And Rinaldo showed unto the Chief Ruler that it was even
as he said.
30. Then was the Chief Ruler vexed as with a devil, and said
within himself: Lo ! I must proceed with but one vessel, and when
I approach the coast of the Dutchman, and he perceiveth that I have
but one ship, peradventure he will not receive me with the pomp
which I deserve.
31. Then cast he about to see how he might increase his im-
portance.
32. And suddenly a bright light shone in on his mind, and he
thought within himself: Have I not the power to appoint the
Judges of the Court? — Now therefore will I make myself the Chief
Justice also, and will go among the Dutchmen even as two great men.
(And he icas two, for he was a man beside himself.) *
33. And I will demand the shillelah, even his mace of office of
the Chief Justice that I may bear it with me to Djawa.
3-4. Then sent he to the Chief Justice and demanded the stick.
35. But the Chief Justice being of the land of Ould Arin,
which love their sticks, would not surrender it.
36. Then the Chief Ruler willing to appease the Chief Justice,
sent unto him two small sticks with silver tops, and wrote unto him:
37. Take thou these two small sticks and give unto me thy big
stick of office, and all shall be friendly between us.
38. But the Judge would not.
30. Then waxed the Chief Ruler wroth for he dared not take
the mace of the Court by force.
40. And he said unto his counsellors: Look now on the evil of
the independence of the Judges if it be granted unto them.
41. Then the Chief Ruler was saddened, and said unto himself:
Lo ! I must proceed in one ship and as one man only. Nevertheless
I will order much powder on the ship of war that much ncise may
be made.
42. And he prepared himself and his followers for the voyage.
43. And when he was ready, he went unto the philosopher of
the period, even unto Extinguisher } and asked of him a letter of
introduction unto some of the people of Djawa.
44. For the philosopher had dwelt there for a period.
45. But he would not, for he said : I will not disappoint his
vanity by letting his character be known of these strangers,
46. Let them find him out for themselves.
I'. D.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. (>l
CHAPTER VI.
1. After these things were accomplished he departed unto the
shores of Djawa.
2. And when he did come unto the land, he was received with
much show, even as he should have received those of station who
had visited his own possession.
3. And a great feast was provided in his name, for the Dutch-
man are fond of their food, as the shape of their bodies prove unto
men, for they carry much about with them.
4. So the Chief Ruler received all the attention which he sought.
5. And when a few days had elapsed after the feast, he called
unto him the Clerk of the Council, and said unto him.
6. What more shall I do, which can be noised abroad unto my
credit ?
7. Then answered the Clerk, who was also the Chief Cook, as
has been said aforetime ;
8. Lo ! there be many of the Queen's subjects in the land:
Give then unto them a reception, that they may all bow unto thee.
9. Thus then shall it be known in ^ingapura that thou art res-
pected out of thine own dominions.
10. (For the Clerk of the Council said, Surely they know him
not in this distant place, therefore will they show him respect )
11. Then did the Chief Ruler cause it to be noised abroad that
he would receive the subjects of his Queen on an appointed day.
12. And when the- hour approached, he repaired in state unto
the room which had been prepared for an audience chamber.
13. And after much time had elapsed, there entered the Cap-
tain of the Peiho, and the Chief Engineer of the vessel (even his
own officers.)
14. And after a longer period came a third man and one woman.
15. Then said the Chief Ruler unto the Clerk of the Council :
16. Surely thou hast made a mistake in the hour, for it cannot
be that none other than these should make obeisance before me.
17. But after much time had passed, and none more appeared,
he said, Verily this climate is unhealthy.
18. And the following day he departed into the wilderness.
19. And after that he had hidden himself there for a period, he
returned without noise unto his own possessions.
20. And when he had come unto 8ingapura, he found that there
was still more complaint against him.
b2 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHED.
21. For six letters had come for him during his absence, and it
was thought of his servants that it would rebound to his honor if
they were despatched unto him by a private vessel, instead of send-
ing them among the letters of common men, for whom a vessel was
provided.
22. Therefore had they sent unto him a private fire-ship with
six letters.
23. And the cost unto the people of Singapura was more than
one thousand pieces of silver, which was near unto two hundred
pieces of silver for each epistle.
24. So the people complained bitterly, and there was little
peace for St. George.
CHAPTER VII.
1. Now there was a certain merchant in Singapura, who was
called the oldest inhabitant, for he had dwelt in the land for many
years.
2. And he was noted for the many services that he had per-
formed, and many high offices of trust had been conferred upon
him by former rulers.
3. And among others was the office of Judge of the Small Court.
4. Moreover the duties of these offices were performed by him
without recompense, and much of his time was devoted to them.
3. And it came to pass that a charge was made against certain
black men of the land (who are naked save that they have a small
piece of cloth about their loins), that they had forged the name of a
dead man in a parchment, whereby the property that would have
been given elsewhere was diverted unto themselves.
6. So these men were arrested by the officers of justice and
brought before the Court.
7. And another Judge was sitting upon the bench.
8. And it came to pass that when the cause was heard that
there was not sufficient evidence against these men.
9. Therefore they were released, and went their ways.
10. And after a few days had elapsed, there came unto the
oldest inhabitant some new witnesses, who did swear against these
men that they were guilty.
11. Moreover they did affirm that these wicked men would de-
part*%e^that they might enjoy the fruits of their wickedness with-
out let or hindrance.
12. And when the Judge did hear these things; he saw that he
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEOKGE. Go
had no time to call upon the Magistrate who had released them
aforetime.
13. So he did order their arrest.
14. And they were brought before the Court again a second time.
15. And when the new witnesses were heard, the evidence was
found to be sufficient to send them unto the high Court of Justice
to be tried.
16. And it came to pass that when the Chief Ruler did hear of
these things he said unto himself ; " Lo ! have I not the power to
remove the Judge of the High Court. Now, therefore will I try
first how it works with a Judge of the Small Court.
17. Then sent he unto the Judge, even the oldest inhabitant,
and did tell him that he had sinned grievously in that he had ar-
rested his black brothers after that they had been released of an-
other Magistrate.
18. And the Chief Ruler commanded him in haughty words to
explain unto him why he had done this deed, without taking coun-
sel with the Judge who had emancipated his colored brethren.
19. Then explained the good Judge his reasons for acting as he
had done.
20. But the Chief Ruler would not be satisfied.
21. And he sent again a second time unto the Judge a more
haughty letter than the first.
22. And when the oldest inhabitant did see how he was treated
by the Chief Ruler, he said unto himself:
23. " Shall my hairs which have grown grey in the service of
my county without recompense or reward, meet with no respect V*
24. And strightway he sent unto the Chief Ruler, and demanded
that he should be released from those duties which he had perform-
ed for so many years.
25. Thus did the good Queen Victoria lose a faithful servant.
26. And when the people heard of this thing, they murmured
and said one unto another: — "Thus is it with the Chief Ruler: He
surroundeth himself with sycophants, who lick the dust from before
liim, but behind him they do curse."
27. Moreover he knoweth not a good and true man when he
falleth in with him."
28. u And lie thought that our oldest inhabitant, being but a
Heed, could be bent, or shaken by his "wind."
29. '* Moreover he doth not even appreciate the services of our
philosopher.
EXTINGUISHER."
6J LETTEBS OF EXTINGUISHED.
CHAPTER VIII.
1. And not long after the return of the Chief Ruler from the
Coast of Djawa, he departed unto the land of the Betelnut.
2. For it was among the allowances and pickings of the Chief
Ruler and his satellites, that -whenever they went abroad from Sin-
gapura they should be allowed a number of shekels each day, over
and above the number that they were allowed by the Queen.
8. And these were railed travelling expenses.
I. Therefore did the Chief Ruler and his favored satellites travel
much.
5. Now the time was fat approaching when the Queen's Son,
even the Juke, should arrive at the land of the Betelnut and at
Singapore
6. And the people of both these places, were true and loyal
subjects of the Queen, desired that they might do her honour
through her son. A
7. Therefore met they together, and debated among themselves
how they could best carry out their wishes.
8. And it was decided among them that they should give unto
the Juke a great feast, and that each man should give generously
of his substance to this end.
9. Moreover did the people agree among themselves that they
should request the Chief Ruler, even as the representative (how-
ever poor) of the Queen, that he should preside at the feast.
10. Therefore went unto him from the land of the Betelnut and
from Singapura certain of the people who were chosen of their fel-
lows because of their virtue.
II. And when they had showed him all these things, the Chief
Ruler gave answer that he would consider upon their wishes.
12. Now these things were dune in Singapura.
13. And after some days were elapsed he departed from the coast.
11. Yet unto that time answered he never a word:
15. But departed for the coast of the laud of the Betelnut tak-
ing with him Thomas, the Billmaker, and a sprained ankle.
1G. And he called Thomas unto him, and said: Thomas, my
mind is troubled because of the loyal wishes of my subjects.
17. For they have sent a deputation unto me, and have asked
that I will preside at a feast prepared for the son of Victoria.
18. And they desire to pay for this feast, each man out of his
own pocket.
CHRONICLED OK ST. GEOROF. 65
19. Now these were my intentions, save that I wished to take
the payment for the feast out of the Treasury, winch is in fact the
pockets of the people, though it appeareth not so
20. Thu3 should I have had the whole credit of the feast.
21. And when it should come unto the ears of Victoria, perad-
venture if the feast were costly even like unto the price of my palace :
22. Then might the Queen make me a peer in the land for the
honour done unto her son, the Juke.
23 Tell me then Thomas. I pray thee, what can I do, that I
may encompass my designs.
24. And Thomas answering, said: Master, I have an idea,
which I trust may have favour in the eyes of my Lord.
25. And it shall be in this wise.
2C). When my Master shall have come unto the land of the
Betelnut, he shall call before him the people of the place, and shall
say unto them ;
27. My children, I think ye for your loyal expressions toward
Victoria and for the kind offer of yourselves and the good people
of Singapura to assist me in giving unto the son of the Queen, even
the Juke, a reception that is fitted unto his position.
28. Moreover, I doubt not that I shall be able to do ail that is
meet unto the occasion.
2i). And I shall not forget you.
30. Then the Chief Rulir pondered upon the speech of Thomas:
31. And it was good.
32. And when he had arrived at the land of the Betelnut, he
spoke even as he was advised of Thomas, the Billmaker.
33. And when the people heard it they were amazed.
34. And they departed each man unto his own home crying-
Walker ! Walker! 7
35. And they sent up a howl that reached even unto the skies.
CHAPTER IX.
1. And the Evil spirit that possessed the Chief Ruler would not
be cast out A :
2. But encompassed him more closely round about, and folded
its black wings about his soul :
3. tSo that he saw not as other men saw, and his walk unto
their eves seemed "slantendicular/'
m LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
4. For at this time came Jonah, called Daniel, one of the unco-
venanted servants of the Queen, from the land of Victoria, where
he had sojourned for a time, that he might become learned in the
laws of the land :
5. That so he might administer them with justice.
6. For aforetime had he been a judge in the Courts of Singapura.
7. Now a judge is one who administereth justice with scales —
over his Eyes.
8. For all mankind have their scales over their eyes— some by
reason of love, some by reason of jealousy, others by reason of
pride ; while there fee some who are so covered with scales that they
be called of their fellow men, scaly.
9. And of such was the Chief Ruler.
10. Now about the time when Jonah called Daniel (not he who
was cast into the lions' den ; neither he who passed through the whale)
returned unto Singapura, there was a vacancy among the high offi-
cers of justice.
11. And it was expected of Daniel and of all the people, that the
Chief Ruler would confer the dignity upon Daniel.
12. For he had served the Queen in the administration of the
law for many years — even for more than twenty years had he serv-
ed his Queen.
13. Moreover during his sojourn in the land of Victoria, had
he perfected himself in the law, that so he might make black appear
white, and white, black ; and right, wrong ; and wrong, right, after
the manner of all great pleaders.
14. (And all mankind looked upon this as glorious, and ap-
plauded those who were successful in such deceit.
15. Thus had they their glory in this world, but were debarred
from the happiness of the next.
16. For it is written that : It is easier for a camel to go through
the eye of a needle, than for a lawyer to enter into the kingdom of
Heaven.)
17. And Jonah, called Daniel, was a lawyer.
18. Then Daniel applied unto the Chief Ruler, that he might
occupy the seat left vacant in the hall of justice.
19. But the Chief Ruler turned unto him a deaf ear, and
would not.
20. But appointed another who was a good man, but of tender
years, and who lacked the experience which was possessed of Daniel.
„ 21. Then Daniel, being justly indignant, resented this act of
^t. George.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 67
22. And lie 3ent word unto St. George that he would no longer
labour for the Queen, who could thus treat him through her ser-
vants ; but that he would serve himself.
23. And straightway he did even as he said.
24. Thus did the Queen lose the oldest judge from her domi-
nions, even as she had lost the oldest inhabitant, as has been told
aforetime,
25. And the people sorrowed greatly, and enquired in their
minds how they might cast out this evil spirit.
26. And one of the chosen asked of the Chief Ruler,
27. Why hast thou done this thing ? Hast thou not cast out
one who has borne the burden and heat of the day, and placed in
the seat which of right was his, one who has entered the vineyard
at the eleventh hour ?
28. Then answered St. George, saying: Thou fool! is it not
written that I. may do what I will with mine own. And are not ye
all my slaves ?
29. Moreover this Daniel, though he be well versed in the an-
cient law of the land, yet knoweth he not the new ones of tSinga-
pura. V
30. For have not I and Thomas, the Billmaker, laid hundreds
of legislative eggs ?
31. And hath not Thomas incubated, and hatched hundreds of
amendments from these ?
32. And Daniel knoweth nought of the omeletology of these
new laws.
33. Moreover it would take him years to understand them.
34. For I, even I, and Thomas the Bill-maker, understand them
not though we hatched them .
35. And I knew that if I appointed a man of much mind, that
the study of these things would drive him mad.
36. Therefore did I have mercy upon Daniel, and did release
him.
37. Now when the people heard these things, they were filled
with joy.
38. For they said : There is still some good in St. George, for
he displayeth a kind heart.
39. But all these things were seen clearly by
% /) , EXTINGUISPIER.
-' m , J ■/■
68 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
CHAPTER X.
1. And even as was said aforetime, in the 2nd Chapter of the
2nd Book of the Chronicles, the people waited impatiently to see
who among their number would accept of the title of honourable.
2. And after many days were accomplished, the Chief Ruler
sent unto two of the people, and said unto them — Ye have afore-
time refused the honour that I offered unto you.
3. Now have I received instructions from the land of our Queen,
and it shall come to pass even as I now say unto you :
4. And it shall be in this wise : If ye accept not now the posi-
tion which I offer unto you, then shall it be that 1 appoint two
black men, even niggers, to fill these places.
5. And the names of these men are Perrianna^Chitty and^Ve-
ringapitty.
b". So shall there be an Honourable Veringapitty and an Ho-
nourable Perianna Chitty in the Council, making laws to govern ye.
7. And one of them," wishing to appease the Chief Ruler, said
unto him :
8. But our Master does not remember that he is even now mak-
ing laws against smells.
9. And it is well known of us all that even that which is now
called the Bouquet d'Ord doth not emit a perfume like unto the
incense from the bodies of these men.
10. Will our Master then take this incense even under his
very nose.
11. Peradventure even these very sweet-savoured men shall
vote against smells.
12. But the Chief Ruler said unto them : I will have them
washed and perfumed by the Chief of the Waterworks even at the
door of the Council Chamber. #
13. And when they saw that the Chief Ruler would do even as
he said, the spirit Bak Bone departed out of them :
14. And they became honourable.
15. And were appointed to fill the places of the two blacks.
16. And they thought within themselves that they had done a
good deed toward their fellow men.
17. But it reminded the Philosopher of an incident that had once
happened unto himself.
18. For once when journeying in the wilderness of the laud of
Unculsam, he was an hungered and athirst.
CHRONICLES OF frT. GEOItGE. &$
19. And he stopped by the wayside at a house wherein dwelt
an old woman.
20. And she placed before him the food of the country, even
baked beans.
21. And when he had eaten his fill, and returned thanks, he
desired to depart
22. But she would not, but begged him that he would eat more.
23. And he answered her that he was filled, and could not.
24. Then prayed she but the more, saying : Fear not that thou
takest away from my store, for whatever thou dost leave, I intended
for the pigs.
25. Thus likened she him even unto her pigs.
26. Yet resisted he the widow's cruise and departed on his own.
27. Oid not the Chief Ruler liken these two men unto his pigs,
and told them that he would give what they left, unto them ?
28. Yet saw they not the stye in his eye, and departed, re-
joicing.
29. So Williamskot (even Gambler Bill) the brother of Tom-
s kot — who was honourable before him — and William, the son of
Adam^ (not that one which killed Abel) were admitted into the
Council.
*(Vice Perrianna Chitty and Veringapitty)*
30. And they were prayed for on every Sabbath day by the
Chief Priest and the people in the temple, and daily in the wilder-
ness by
EXTINGUISHER.
CHAPTER XI.
1. And it came to pass that when the building of the palace was
accomplished, the Chief Ruler and his followers removed within
its walls.
2. And he took with him his elephant and his Hocks, his herds,
his cockatoo and all that was his.
3. And after that he was sat down, he sent and called unto him
Mustirattindint, and said unto him :
4. Raise up for me upon the roof of my palace a large staff from
which I may display my banner.
r. D.
70 LETTERS 01 EXTINGUISHER.
5. Aud Mustirattindint said unto the Chief Ruler Would it uot
be better to plant a large staff in front of thy palace, as is the
custom ?
6. But St. George cast upon him a withering glance, and said
unto him :
7. Mustirattindint : hast thou ever visited the Queen at her
Palace of Buckingham ?
8. And Mustirattindint said that he had not done so of late.
9. Then answered the Chief Ruler : This then accounteth for
thine ignorance ; for when I visited the Queen, and was taken to
view the Palace, I saw the staff for her banner upon the walls and
it is meet that I have my palace arranged even like unto that of
the Queen.
10. Then Mustirattindint, being overcome by the majesty of
the presence, subsided, and answered never a word :
11. But went and did even as he was commanded.
12. And the Chief Ruler planted his banner upon the walls,
even as it is in the Palace of Buckingham.
13. Moreover St. Georee had his own way in all things as
aforetime, and his course was unchanged, for there were now none
to dispute him.
14:. For the time wa3 drawing near when the Juke should visit
the coast.
15. And many of the enemies of the Chief Ruler had turned
their coats even unto the last sleeve, that so they might be in the
good graces of St. George, and be made of importance in the pre-
sence of the Juke.
16. (For when a man changes the side of his coat, it signifies
that^he changes his principles likewise.)
17. Moreover there was a great feast to be given by the Chief
Ruler, and his opposers feared that they would be left in the cold.
18. Now when the Philosopher saw all these things, he thought
within himself :
10. Shall I not likewise turn my coat and show myself unto the
Chief Ruler that I may also sit with royalty ?
20. But the early principles of virtue that had been instilled
into his heart, permitted not of it.
21. And he turned him unto his tub, and moralized upon the
strange ways of the world.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 71
CHAPTER XII.
1. Now there was in Singapura a certain Club which was called
the Tangleing Club, because that at the joyous dances and merry-
makings held there many heart-strings had become entangled for
life.
2. And when the Chief Ruler had newly come to govern the
land, the chief men of the Club, wishing to do him honour, had
invited him to come to one of these merry-makings.
8. But St. George, enwrapping himself in pompous dignity, had
returned no answer to the Chief men.
4. Therefore waxed they wroth.
5. And they passed a law that he should be invited no more.
6. And when the time drew nigh for the arrival of the Juke, it
was made known that the son of the Queen was exceeding fond of
the sports of the Club.
7. And it was decided that he should be invited to join in them.
8. And when this had come unto the ears of the Chief Ruler,
he sent unto the chief men, desiring that he also might be invited.
9. But the chief men, remembering them of the slight put upon
the Club, would not.
10 And it came to pass that when the Juke had arrived, the
Chief Ruler sent straightway unto him, and begged him that he
would not enter the doors of the Tangleing Club.
11. And the Juke, knowing nought of the matter, consented
unto the request of St. George, and joined not with his own coun-
trymen, who loved him much for his Mother's sake.
12. But was led by one of the dragons of St. George unto a
Club of foreigners, and disported himself there.
13. Thus did the Chief Ruler again show the smallness of his
mind, and drive another nail into his official coffin.
CHAPTER XIII.
1. And there was a feast at the palace of the Chief Ruler, and
all the subjects of the Queen who dwelt in the land of Singapura,
were bidden unto it, that they might meet the Juke.
2. And among the number of the guests, was Hatchsoon, the
notable pleader.
72 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
3. [He it is, o£ whom it was written that his paths dropped
fatness.]
4. And Hatchsoon went unto the Chief Dragon of St. George,
whose surname was Pullow, and said unto him:
5. Why is this dissension between the Chief Ruler and the
people ?
6. It is not better that we dwell together in peace and amity?
7. Then answered the Ciiief Dragon saying: Ye have not bow-
ed down before us, as ye must ; and I say unto you that ye shall
all go down on your marrowbones to us, before there shall be peace
between the Chief Ruler and the people.
8. Then Hatchsoon,- being incensed because of the rudeness of
the speech of the Chief Dragon, answered him saying:
9. Peradventure thou art the Chief Ruler, and thine are the acts
of which we complain, for such one would judge from the manner
of thy speech.
10. Then said the Chief Dragon: Lo! in this matter 'tis even
as thou sayest.
11. And when Hatchsoon reported these words unto divers of
the people, they expressed no surprise :
12. For it was known of many of them that Pullow acted oft-
time in the capacity of Governor, as well as Chief Cook, and that
many of the unhappy dissensions had been caused by his acts and
by reason of his evil counsels
13. And it was remarked by many that the nose of St. George
was fast increasing in length, for he had been led much by it.
CHAPTER XIV.
1. Now, in the land of Johore, that lieth over against Singa-
pura, there dwelt a native King.
2. He it was to whom was given the noble order of the Star of
India, that an exception might be made to prove the rule that this
decoration was bestowed upon those who had achieved some glo-
rious deed.
3. And after that the Juke had been feasted in Singapura, he
was invited of the native King to visit his dominions.
4. Moreover, the King commanded that a mighty feast should
be prepared, and that wild beasts should be procured to fight and
rend each other before the Juke.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 73
5. For such is the custom among these barbarians.
6. And the Chief Ruler, even St. George, with his dragon and
his other evil counsellors, and all of the chief among the dealers in
merchandise, were bidden to the feast.
7. And the hour set apart for the feast was the twelfth hour.
8. Now, as the twelfth hour drew nigh the guests which had
been bidden unto the feast began to arrive.
9. And they were an hungered and athirst, for the journey was
a long one, and the sun was fierce.
10. But when they came nigh unto the place of the feast, they
found St. George, his dragon, and his evil cousellors, had well nigh
finished the good things provided.
11. And they were wroth at such treatment.
12. Then one of them, who was a centurion, even the Captain
of a hundred in the 75th, went unto the native Kino-, and upbraid-
ed him, saying :
13. Why hast thou done this evil thing?
14. Didst thou not bid us to come to thy feast at the twelfth
hour?
15. The time has not even yet arrived, and the food has well
nigh disappeared.
16. Then answered the native King, and said unto the centurion:
17. Lo! the Chief Ruler said unto me, Thus must thou do,
and I have done even as he commanded, for I look upon him as my
master.
18. Then some among the people swore, for they saw that they
were of less account than even the stomach of the Ckief Ruler.
19. Thus did St. George, even within seven days, prevail upon
the Juke and again upon the native King that they should show
contempt toward the people of Singapura.
20. For his own discourtesy and snobishness was not sufficient
unto him. / ^
21. And his selfishness and vanity knew no bounds.
22. . Thus again was another of the few remaining pegs driven
into the coffin of the Chief Ruler.
23. And the people said one unto another : The name of the
Chief Ruler is already inscribed upon his official coffin plate, and
it needeth now but the date.
74 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
CHAPTER XV.
1. And it came to pass on the day of the feast that was given
by the native King that the Lieutenant of the Chief Ruler died.
2. Now this Lieutenant was second only unto the Chief Ruler
himself.
3. And when St George was absent for a season, he ruled in
his stead.
4. And he was beloved much, for he had been many years
among the people, and his heart was big with love, and gentleness.
5. In so much that no man could say aught against him, for he
had treated all with loving kindness.
0. And when ihe news of the death of his Lieutenant came unto
the ears of St. George, he was an attendance upon the Juke, in the
midst of the sports provided by the native King.
7. Yet stayed he not the sports.
8. For he desired to show unto the Juke the majesty of St.
George and the littleness of all other beings in the land.
9. So he toadied unto the Juke, and went down continually on
his marrowbones before him.
10. For he thought within himself:
11. If I impress the Juke with a sense of my majesty and pow-
er, and yet the readiness of that majesty to bend to him, mayhap
his mother, when it is noised abroad, will raise me a step in rank.
12. And it rested with the Chief Ruler to appoint the hour in
which his great and good Lieutenant should be borne to his last
resting place.
13. And it came to pass, that when the sports in the land of
Johore were ended, the Chief Ruler returned unto his own coast.
14. And the people waited anxiously for his return, that the
hour of the burial might be announced, that so they might accom-
pany to the grave the body of one who was so justly beloved
of them.
15. Yet kept he the hour secret.
16. Moreover he requested of the Chief of the Queen's forces,
that the body might be laid in the grave without the Military
honours that were due unto the departed.
17. But the Commander of the forces would not consent.
18. And when the hour for the burial drew nigh, the places
of many of the near friends of the deceased among the mourners
were vacant.
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 75
19. Therefore was the cause of this enquired.
20. And when the people found that the hour for the burial
had not been noised abroad, and that the body had been taken to
the grave, with a haste that was unusual and unnecessary, they
were filled with indignation and cried aloud, saying:
21. Is it not enough that this man should insult the living?
22. Must he even show his pompous vanity and want of respect
unto the dead?
23. So the Lieutenant of the Chief Ruler was gathered unto
his Fathers, and his memory, even in his graYe. was insulted by
this man.
24. And it was felt more deeply of the people, inasmuch as the
Juke himself had shewn respect unto the corpse of a poor and most
humble servant of his but two days before.
25. And had followed the body on foot unto the grave.
26. Thus was given unto the people to perceive the difference
between the acts of true, high-born Majesty, and the miserable
vanity of a bird in false plumage.
CHAPTER XVI.
1. Now, after the death of the good Lieut. Governor, the Chief
Ruler cast about him to see whom he should choose to fill this high
place.
2. And his choice fell upon Kapitanshaw, even the Kapitan or
chief man among the Malacchites.
3. Then was Kapitanshaw sent unto Singapura that he should
fill the pbce of the loved departed one, and that he should govern
in the place of the Chief Ruler during his absence.
4. For the Chief Ruler had gone to curry favour with the Juke.
5. Even unto the land of the Betelnut had he departed.
6. And when the Chief Ruler had made his choice, he sent his
commands unto Kapitanshaw that he should depart at once for the
coast of Singapura.
7. Moreover he said into him There be few spacious dwellings
there. Take thou, then, the house called Vonderhider, which was
furnished for the retinue of the Juke, and dwell thou therein.
8. Then departed Kapitanshaw unto the land of Singapura.
9. And he found all even as the Chief Ruler had spoken.
10. And he went to dwell in the house called Vonderhider'
76 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
11. But the Chief Ruler remained for a long season in the land
of the Betelnut, and in the province called Wellington, which is
also of the Queen's dominions.
12. And he did much good there.
13. For it was noticed of the people that on whichever road he
was to travel, all was made smooth.
14. So it came to pass that on these roads, holes which had ex-
isted for years were filled up, and all unevenesses removed :
15. Even as it should have been in the passage of Royalty.
16; Therefore did the people of the land of the Betelnut and
the Province of Wellington rejoice.
17. And the Chief Ruler basked in the sunshine of their adu-
lation :
18. But after a time, lest this sun should set, as it had always
done aforetime in any region wheiein he L had long remained, he
returned unto the coast of Singapura
19. And after St. George had returned a few days, his Dragon
— (even Pullow who furnished him the marrowbones of merchants
from the Square) — came unto him, and complained that he had not
yet received his financial feed.
20 Then St. George who was enamoured of his Dragon, made
out a bill in his name, and sent it unto Kapitanshaw that he should
subscribe his name unto it — as was the custom — that so the trea-
surer might pay it.
21. But when it came unto Kapitanshaw, he said : Who is this
man Pullow, that he should receive recompense for that he has not
done. Had he done this duty for which payment is asked, he would
have been in this same room with myself. Yet have 1 not seen
him once.
22. Then whispered a timid servant in his ear; It is a favourite
satellite of the Chief, and he nameth the Dragon unto the office that
he may receive its recompense, without bearing its labour.
23. But Kapitanshaw was obtuse and saw it not in that light.
2-1. And he refused to sign the Bill because that it was unjust.
25. Then was the Chief Ruler wroth, yet could he not remove
Kapitanshaw, lest he should cause trouble unto himself.
26. Therefore did he a small act, which was natural unto him.
27. For straightway he wrote unto Kapitanshaw, and demanded
that he should leave the house where he dwelt, for the furniture
belonged unto the Queen, and must be sold forthwith.
27. And when this was noised abroad one said — Is the Queen
hard vp, that she must sell this furniture so quickly V
CHRONICLES OF ST. GEORGE. 77
20. But one who was acquainted with the matter answered and
said ; Not so, but that the Chief Ruler may pay the balance on
the Steamer that^iis not coming out.
30. So was Kapitanshaw sent to look for a tent in the wilder-
ness, with his flocks and his herds and all that was his.
31 . And he found one belonofingr to a dealer in frozen water.
32. And he dwelt there.
33. Now, soon after, the Chief Ruler met the Philosopher eat-
ing the air of the morning.
34. And St. George said unto the Philosopher — Thou perceivest
that I take the bull by the horns.
35. Then answered the Philosopher — I do twig even as thou
sayest, yet if a weak man taketh hold of a strong bull's horns, and
holdeth thereon without retreat, surely the man shall be tossed in
the air to his injury?
3<>. — Then offered St. George to give odds to the Philosopher
that he would hang on the horns, and get the best of the bull.
37. — But the Pliilo : Avould not bet, for he feared that all the
money of the Treasury had been exhausted in Steamers and other
extravagances.
38. Moreover, in a few days he was to leave the Coast for his
own country, for the healers of the sick had ordered that he should
bathe in the waters of the Mississippi.
39. And when the Chief Ruler heard that he was soon to depart,
he went not unto the Philosopher's tub, which lay on Bukit Cher-
min, to thank him for the kind advice he had freely given unto him.
40. Nevertheless the Philosopher determined that he would
write his Exodus in a farewell, trusting that the Chief Ruler mighj.
still find out that a true friend ofttime chideth.
EXODUS.
Chapter 1st and Last.
1. Extinguisher unto St. George the Chief Ruler, and his
mindless satellites :
2. Pax and reformation vobiscum !
3. Yet see I small signs of it yet, though I have taught ye
freely for years past.
78 LETTERS OF EXTINGUISHER.
4. And now that I leave, my heart yearneth toward ye, that
I might take ye with me.
5. (And drop ye on the road, that so the land of ^iugapura
might be happy, and that the philosopher might have peace likewise.)
6. Thou stubborn and perverse generation of Cobras — swell not
out thy cheeks with pride, lest men, knowing y th se signs thy poi-
son, should trample upon ye to sumM your stings.
7. Yet can I not abide with ye longer to advise ye.
8. Hearken, then, unto the lessons have taught ye, and ye may
still be happy, and content those whom ye legislate for.
9. And thou, St. George : Take thine hands from off the
horns of that bull.
10. Thou canst not cope with the tiger !
11. And hast thou not but now showed unto the Juke that
the bull can prevail even over the tiger ?
12. How, then, canst thou expect to be victorious in this strug-
gle?
13. Moreover, pay unto thy servants the wages due unto their
labour, but appoint no man unto an office without labour merely
that thou mayest thrust unearned money from the Queen's people
into the pocket of a favourite !
f
M16657?
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