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 '\f
 
 GINX'S BABY
 
 En quid apis? duplici in diversum scinderis hamo 
 Hunccine an liunc stqueris? 
 
 « « * « » 
 
 Nam et luctata canis nodum abripit, attamen illi 
 Quum lugic a collu trabitur pars luugu catena; i
 
 GINX'S BABY 
 
 3Hi 
 
 ;ji!i ^iitlt -.nil) iithci- ^tlbfortuiud 
 
 S/XJH EDITIO.X. 
 
 STRAHAN & CO, PUBLISHERS 
 
 50 LUDGATE HILL, LOXDuX 
 
 1871 
 
 A II ii^/i/s teitn -ed
 
 » • t » ' t 
 t • - « • / « 
 
 * ' : • • • ; 
 
 • t» •« •*»»•
 
 
 PREFACE. 
 
 Critic. — / 7icver read a more improhahle story 
 in my lije. 
 
 Author. — Notiniihstandingy it may he true. 
 
 21 29i
 
 NOTE TO THE SECOND EDITION. 
 
 Three or four weeks after tlie publication of 
 " Ginx's Baby," the Author is called upon by the 
 Publishers to revise it for a Second Edition. With 
 commendable alacrity, five American publishers have 
 already announced as many editions. In this notoriety 
 of the fortunes of " Ginx's Baby," the most deep and 
 real satisfaction comes from the general recognition 
 of the sincere and earnest purpose of the history. 
 This sufficiently neutralises the misunderstandings or 
 misjudgments of some two or three critics. 
 
 To those who have criticised the book in the 
 modern fashion, the Author has only most gently 
 to deprecate that they should have felt themselves 
 constrained to make objections when they obviously
 
 KOTE TO THE SECOND EDITION. 
 
 had none to make. To take an instance : one not 
 unkindly critic declares that the Author "often 
 mistakes invective for satire" — a remark so para- 
 doxical as to require solution. The Author is con- 
 scious of having deliberately used both invective 
 and satire, but the error of confounding them he 
 returns to the critic. The same judge observes : — 
 " The only man described in the book who has any 
 indefinite {(piare, definite ?) remedies to propose for 
 the diseases of modern civilisation is a generous-hearted 
 fanatic rather than a judicious statesman;" and he 
 records his suspicion that Sir Charles Sterling's most 
 impracticable suggestions are " especially dear to the 
 Author." Did it not occur to the critic that the 
 Author intended to represent in Sir Charles Sterling 
 a " generous-hearted fanatic," and that his intention 
 is clearly written on every page of the baronet's 
 exaggerated talk? A man made an enthusiast by 
 too keen a sensitiveness to wrong and sorrow is not 
 an unnatural or unadmirable character; nay, much 
 wisdom may play brightly through the thunder-clouds 
 of his passion.
 
 NOTE TO THE SECOND EDITION. 
 
 Lastly, the Author desires to set himself right with 
 the Reader on one point in which it seems he is 
 likely to be misunderstood. The Editor of the Spectator 
 otherwise applauding, had referred to the passage on 
 the "Timbuctoo question," pp. 207 — 8, as "utterly 
 and basely wrong." In the Spectator of June 4th 
 appeared the following letter from the Author ; com- 
 mending which to his Readers and Critics, he confides 
 to their consciences the Second Edition. 
 
 TO THE EDITOR OF THE " SPECTATOR." 
 
 Sir, — In your kindly notice of my little book on Saturday 
 last you did me an unintentional though an almost deserved in- 
 justice. Will you allow me to relieve myself from it without 
 doffing my incognito ? You have read a passage on " the 
 Timbuctoo question " as an expression of that extreme and 
 ignoble Radicalism which would subordinate the honour of the 
 nation to its wealth. Perhaps my incautious anger has left the 
 passage open to that interpretation, but I wish to disclaim it. 
 I revolt from that doctrine as much as you, and if you knew my 
 name you would perhaps recognise one who has publicly and 
 practically striven to refute it. 
 
 My mind when I wrote the passage referred to was indignantly 
 alert to the contrast between tlae fury, vigour, and sacrifice so
 
 NOTE TO THE SECOND EDITION, 
 
 quick for such an enterprise as that, and the mournful debility 
 of zeal in the redress of our own home sorrows. I may be 
 "sometimes unjust," God knows I wish I were all untrue. 
 Besides, you will allow rae to think, as 1 do, that a little ]iolitic 
 management and expenditure might have rescued the Abyssinian 
 captives without an expedition costing ^10,000,000. Otherwise, 
 I agree with you that a people unchary of its honour at any 
 sacrifice is fit only to be enslaved by some nobler race. 
 
 I am, Sir, &c., 
 
 The AuTiiou oi- " Gi.\x"6 Baby."
 
 CONTENTS. 
 
 PART I. 
 
 WHAT GINX DID WITH HIM. 
 
 I. Ab initio 
 II. Home, sweet Home ! 
 
 III. Work and Ideas . 
 
 IV. Digressive, and may be skipped without 
 
 the History 
 V. Reasons and Resolves 
 VI. The Antagonism of Law and Necessity 
 YH. Malthus and Man 
 Vill. The Baby's First Translation 
 
 muti 
 
 latin 
 
 PACK 
 I 
 
 5 
 
 12 
 
 i6 
 
 23 
 
 26 
 
 42 
 
 PART II. 
 
 WHAT CHARITY AND THE CHURCHES DID WITH HIM. 
 
 I. The Milk of Human Kindness, Mother's Milk, 
 
 and the Milk of the Word .... 45 
 
 II. The Protestant Detectoral Association . . 56 
 
 III. The Sacrament of Baptism 61 
 
 IV. Law on Behalf of Gospel . . . . .64 
 V. ^Magistrate's Law 74 
 
 VI. Popery and Protestantism in the Queen's Bench . 78 
 
 VII. A Protestor, but not a Protestant ... 84 
 
 VIII. " See how these Christians love one another " . 87 
 
 IX. Good Samaritans, and Good-.Samaritan Twopences 100
 
 CONTENTS. 
 
 PAGR 
 
 X. The Force — and a Specimen of its Weakness . 104 
 
 XL The Unity of the Spirit and the Bond of Peace . 108 
 
 XII. No Funds — no Faith, no Works . . . .129 
 
 XIII. In transitu 131 
 
 PART III. 
 
 WHAT THE PARISH DID WITH HIM. 
 
 I. Parochial Ivnots — to be untied without Prejudice . 133 
 
 II. A Board of Guardians 135 
 
 III. " The World is my Parish " 142 
 
 VI. Without Prejudice to any one but the Guardians . 144 
 
 V. An Ungodly Jungle 151 
 
 VI. Parochial Benevolence — and another Translation . 158 
 
 PART I\\ 
 
 WHAT THE CLUBS AND POLITICIANS DID WITH HIM. 
 
 I. Moved on 165 
 
 II. Club Ideas 168 
 
 III. A thorough-paced Reformer — if not a Revolutionary 177 
 
 IV. Very Broad Views 189 
 
 V. Party Tactics — and Political Obstmctions to Social 
 
 Reform ........ 202 
 
 VT. Amateur Debating in a High Legislative Body . 214 
 
 PART V. 
 
 WHAT GINX'S BABY DID WITH HIMSKLF. 
 
 The Last Chapter 221
 
 PART T. 
 
 WHAT GINX DID WITH HLM. 
 
 I. — Ab initio. 
 
 'nr^HE name of the father of Ginx's Baby 
 was Ginx. By a not unexceptional 
 coincidence, its mother was ^Irs. Ginx. The 
 gender of Ginx's Baby was masculine. 
 
 On the day when our hero was born, Mr. 
 and Mrs. Ginx were living at Number Five, 
 Rosemary Street, in the city of Westminster. 
 The being then and there brought into the 
 world was not the only human entity to 
 which the title of "Ginx's Baby" was or 
 had been appropriate. Ginx had been mar- 
 ried to Betsy Hicks at St. John's, West- 
 minster, on the twenty-lifth day of October, 
 
 B
 
 GINXS BABY, 
 
 1 8 — , as appears from the "marriage lines" 
 retained by Betsy Ginx, and carefully col- 
 lated by me with the original register. Our 
 hero was their thirteenth child. Patient in- 
 quiry has enabled me to verify the following 
 history of their propagations. On July the 
 twenty-fifth, the year after their marriage, 
 Mrs. Ginx was safely delivered of a girl. No 
 announcement of this appeared in the news- 
 papers. On the tenth of April following, the 
 whole neighbourhood, including Great Smith 
 Street, IMarsham Street, Great and Little 
 Peter Streets, Regent Street, Horseferry Road, 
 and Strutton Ground, was convulsed by the 
 report that a woman named Ginx had given 
 birth to " a triplet," consisting of two girls 
 and a boy. The news penetrated to Dean's 
 Yard and the ancient school of Westminster, 
 'llie Dean, who accepted nothin^i^ on trust.
 
 A B INITIO. 
 
 sent to verify the report, his messenger bear- 
 ing a bundle of baby-clothes from the Dean's 
 wife, who thought that the mother could 
 scarcely have provided for so large an addi- 
 tion to her family. The schoolboys, on their 
 way to the play-ground at Vincent Square, 
 slyly diverged to have a look at the curiosity, 
 paying sixpence a head to Mrs. Ginx's friend 
 and crony, Mrs. Spittal, who pocketed the 
 money, and said nothing about it to the sick 
 woman. This birth was announced in all the 
 newspapers throughout the kingdom, with the, 
 further news that Her Majesty the Queen had 
 been graciously pleased to forward to IMrs. 
 Ginx the sum of three pounds. 
 
 What could have possessed the woman I 
 can't say, but about a twelvemonth after, 
 Mrs. Ginx, w^ith the assistance of two doc- 
 tors hastily fetched from the hospital by her
 
 G I NX's BABY. 
 
 frightened husband, nearly perished in a 
 fresh effort of maternity. This time two sons 
 and two daughters fell to the lot of the happy 
 pair. Her Majesty sent four pounds. But 
 whatever peace there was at home, broils 
 disturbed the street. The neighbours, who 
 had sent for the police on the occasion, were 
 angered by a notoriety which was becoming 
 uncomfortable to them, and began to testify 
 their feelings in various rough ways. Ginx 
 removed his family to Rosemary Street, 
 where, up to a year before the time when 
 Ginx's Baby was born, his wife had con- 
 tinued to add to her offspring until the tale 
 reached one dozen. It was then that Ginx 
 affectionately but firmly begged that his wife 
 would consider her family ways, since, in all 
 conscience, he had fairly earned the blessed- 
 ness of the man who hath his quiver full of
 
 HOME. SWEET H O M E ! 
 
 them ; and frankly gave her notice that, as 
 his utmost efforts could scarcely maintain 
 their existing family, if she ventured to pre- 
 sent him with any more, either single, or 
 twins, or triplets, or otherwise, he would 
 most assuredly drown him, or her, or them 
 in the water-butt, and take the consequences. 
 
 * * 
 * 
 
 II. — Home, sweet Home ! 
 
 The day on which Ginx uttered his awful 
 threat was that next to the one wherein 
 number twelve had drawn his first breath. 
 His wife lay on the bed which, at the outset 
 of wedded life, they had purchased second- 
 hand in Strutton Ground for the sum of nine 
 shillings and sixpence. Second-hand ! It had 
 passed through, at least, as many hands
 
 GINXS CABY. 
 
 as there were aftenvards babies born upon 
 it. Twelfth or thirteenth hand, a vagabond, 
 botched bedstead, type of all the furni- 
 ture in Ginx's rooms, and in numberless 
 houses through the vast city. Its dimensions 
 were 4 feet 6 inches by 6 feet. When Ginx, 
 who was a stout navvy, and ]\Irs. Ginx, who 
 was, you may conceive, a matronly woman, 
 were in it, there w^as little vacant space about 
 them. Yet, as they were forced to find rest- 
 ing-places for all the children, it not seldom 
 happened that at least one infant was peri- 
 lously wedged between the parental bodies ; 
 and latterly they had been so pressed for 
 room in the household that two younglings 
 were nestled at the foot of the bed. Without 
 foot-board or pillows, the lodgment of these 
 infants was precarious, since any fatuous 
 movement of Ginx's legs was likely to expel
 
 HOME, SWEET HOME! 
 
 them head-first. However they were safe, 
 for they were sure to fall on one or other of 
 their brothers or sisters. 
 
 I shall be as particular as a valuer, and 
 describe what I have seen. The family sleep- 
 ing-room measured 13 feet 6 inches by 14 feet. 
 Opening- out of this, and again on the landing 
 of the third-floor, was their kitchen and sit- 
 ting-room ; it was not quite so large as the 
 other. This room contained a press, an old 
 chest of drawers, a wooden box once used for 
 nav^'y's tools, three chairs, a stool, and some 
 cooking utensils. When, therefore, one little 
 Ginx had curled himself up under a blanket on 
 the box, and three more had slipped beneath 
 a tattered piece ot carpet under the table, 
 there still remained five little bodies to be 
 bedded. For them an old straw mattress, 
 limp enough to be rolled up and thrust under
 
 8 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 the bed, was at night extended on the floor. 
 With this, and a patchwork quilt, the five 
 were left to pack themselves together as 
 best they could. So that, if Ginx, in some 
 vision of the night, happened to be angered, 
 and struck out his legs in navvy fashion, it 
 sometimes came to pass that a couple of 
 children tumbled upon the mass of infantile 
 humanity below. 
 
 Not to be described are the dinginess of 
 the walls, the smokiness of the ceilings, the 
 grimy windows, the heavy, ever-murky atmo- 
 sphere of these rooms. They were 8 feet 
 6 inches in height, and any curious statist 
 can calculate the number of cubic feet of air 
 which they afforded to each person 
 
 The oth(,-r side of the street was 14 feet dis- 
 tant. Behind, the backs of similar tenements 
 came up black and cowering over the little
 
 HOME, SWEET HOME! 
 
 yard of Number Five. As rare, in the well 
 thus formed, was the circulation of air as that 
 of coin in the pockets of the inhabitants. I 
 have seen the yard ; let me warn you, if you 
 are fastidious, not to enter it. Such of the 
 filth of the house as could not, at night, be 
 thrown out of the front windows, was there 
 collected, and seldom, if ever, removed. What 
 became of it ? What becomes of countless 
 such accretions in like places ? Are a large 
 proportion of these filthy atoms absorbed by 
 human creatures living and dying, instead of 
 being carried away by scavengers and inspec- 
 tors ? The forty-five big and little lodgers in 
 the house were provided with a single office 
 in the corner of the yard. It had once been 
 
 capped by a cistern, long since rotted away — 
 * « « « 
 
 The street was at one time the prey of the
 
 lO GINX'S BABY 
 
 gas company; at another, of the drainage 
 contractors. They seemed to delight in turn- 
 ing up the foetid soil, cutting deep trenches 
 through various strata of filth, and piling up 
 for days or weeks matter that reeked with 
 vegetable and animal decay. One needs not 
 affirm that Rosemary Street was not so called 
 from its fragrance. If the Ginxes and their 
 neighbours preserved any semblance of health 
 in this place, the most popular guardian on 
 the board must own it a miracle. They, poor 
 people, knew nothing of " sanitary reform," 
 " sanitary precautions," " zymotics," " en- 
 demics," " epidemics," " deodorisers," or 
 "disinfectants." They regarded disease with 
 the apathy of creatures who felt it to be in- 
 separable from humanity, and with the fatal- 
 ism of despair. 
 
 Gin was their cardinal prescription, not for
 
 HOME, SWEKT HOME! II 
 
 cure, but for oblivion : " Sold everjovhere." 
 A score of palaces flourished within call of each 
 other in that dismal district — garish, rich- 
 looking dens, drawing to the support of their 
 vulgar glory the means, the lives, the eternal 
 destinies of the wrecked masses about them. 
 Veritable wreckers they who construct these 
 haunts, viler than the wretches who place false 
 beacons and, plunder bodies on the beach. 
 Bring down the real owners of these places, and 
 show them their deadly work ! Some of them 
 leading Philanthropists, eloquent at Mission- 
 ary meetings and Bible Societies, paying tri- 
 bute to the Lord out of the pockets of dying 
 drunkards, fighting glorious battles for slaves, 
 and manfully upholding popular rights. ]\Iy 
 rich publican — forgive the pun — before you pay 
 tithes of mint and cummin, much more before 
 you claim to be a disciple of a certain Naza-
 
 12 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 rene, take a lesson from one who restored 
 fourfold the money he had wrung from honest 
 toil, or reflect on the case of the man to whom 
 it was said, " Go sell all thou hast, and give 
 to the poor." The lips from which that 
 counsel dropped offered some unpleasant 
 alternatives, leaving out one, however, which 
 nowada5's may yet reach you — the contempt 
 
 of your kind. 
 
 ♦ ♦ 
 * 
 
 III. — Work and Ideas. 
 
 I RETURN again to Ginx's menace to his 
 wife, who was suckling her infant at the time 
 on the bed. For her he had an animal affec- 
 tion that preserved her from unkindness, even 
 in his cups. His hand had never unmanned 
 itself by striking her, and rarely indeed did it 
 injure anyone else, lie wrestled not against
 
 WORK AND IDEAS. 13 
 
 flesh and blood, or powers, or principalities, 
 or wicked spirits in high places. He struggled 
 with clods and stones, and primeval chaos. 
 His hands were horny with the fight, and his 
 nature had perhaps caught some of the dull 
 ruggedness of the things wherewith he battled. 
 Hard and with a will had he worked through 
 the years of wedded life, and, to speak him 
 fair, he had acted honestly, within the limits 
 of his knowledge and means, for the good of 
 his family. How narrow were those limits ! 
 Every week he threw into the lap of Mrs. 
 Ginx the eighteen or twenty shillings which 
 his strength and temperance enabled him 
 continuously to earn, less sixpence reser\-ed 
 for the public - house, whither he retreated 
 on Sundays after the family dinner. A 
 dozen children overrunning the space in 
 his rooms was then a strain beyond the en-
 
 14 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 durance of Ginx. Nor had he the heart to 
 try the common plan, and turn his children 
 out of doors on the chance of their being 
 picked up in a raid of Sunday School teachers. 
 So he turned out himself to talk with the 
 humbler spirits of the "Dragon," or listen 
 sleepily while alehouse demagogues pre- 
 scribed remedies for State abuses. 
 
 Our friend was nearly as guiltless of know- 
 ledge as if Eve had never rifled the tree 
 whereon it grew. Vacant of policies were 
 his thoughts ; innocent he of ideas of state- 
 craft, lie knew there was a Oueen ; he had 
 seen her. Lords and Commons were to him 
 vague deities possessing strange powers. 
 Indeed, he had been present when some of 
 liis better-informed companions had recog- 
 nised with cheers certain gentlemen, — of 
 whom Ginx's estimate was expressed by a
 
 WORK AND IDEAS. 15 
 
 reference to his test of superiority to himself 
 in that which he felt to be greatest within 
 him — "I could lick 'em with my little finger" 
 — as the Chancellor of the Exchequer and 
 the Prime Minister. Little recked he of their 
 uses or abuses. The functions of Government 
 were to him Asian mysteries. He only felt 
 that it ought to have a strong arm, like the 
 brawny member wherewith he preserved order 
 in his domestic kingdom, and therefore gene- 
 rally associated Government with the Police. 
 In his view these were to clear away evil-doers 
 and leave every one else alone. The higher 
 objects of Government were, if at all, outlined 
 in the shadowiest form in his imagination. 
 Government imposed taxes — that he was 
 obliged to know. Government maintained the 
 parks ; for that he thanked it. Government 
 made laws, but what they were, or with what
 
 1 6 G I N X'S B A B Y 
 
 aim or effects made, he knew not, save only 
 that by them something Avas done to raise or 
 depress the prices of bread, tea, sugar, and 
 other necessaries. Why they should do so 
 he never conceived— I am not sure that he 
 cared. Legislation sometimes pinched him, 
 but darkness so hid from him the persons and 
 objects of the legislators that he could not 
 criticise the theories which those powerful 
 beings were subjecting to experiment at 
 his cost. I must, at any risk, say something 
 about this in a separate chapter. 
 
 * ♦ 
 
 * 
 
 IV. — Digressive, and may be skipped without mutilating 
 the History. 
 
 I STOP here to address any of the following 
 characters, should he perchance read these 
 memoirs :
 
 A DIGRESSION. 
 
 n 
 
 You, ]\Ir. Statesman — if there be such ; 
 
 Mr. Pseudo-Statesman, Placeman, Party 
 
 Leader, Wirepuller ; 
 Mr. Amateur Statesman, Dilettante Lord, 
 
 Civil Servant ; 
 Mr. Clubman, Litterateur, Newspaper 
 
 Scribe ; 
 Mr. People's Candidate, Demagogue, 
 Fenian Spouter; 
 or whoever you may be, professing to know 
 aught or do anything in matters of policy, 
 consider, what I am sure you have never 
 fairly weighed, the condition of a man whose 
 clearest notion of Government is derived from 
 the Police ! Imagine one who had never seen 
 a polyp trying to construct an ideal of the 
 animal, from a single tentacle swinging out 
 from the tangle of weed in which the rest was 
 wrapped! How then any more can you 
 
 C
 
 l8 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 fancy that a man to whose sight and know- 
 ledge the only part of government prac- 
 tically exposed is the strong process of 
 police, shall form a proper conception of the 
 functions, reasons, operations, and relations 
 of Government ; or even build up an ideal of 
 anything but a haughty, unreasonable, anta- 
 gonistic, tax-imposing FORCE ! And how can 
 you rule such a being except as you rule a 
 dog, by that which alone he understands — 
 the dog-whip of the constable ! Given in a 
 country a majority of creatures like these, and 
 surely despotism is its properest complement. 
 But when they exist, as they exist in England 
 to-day, in hundreds of thousands, in town 
 and country, think what a complication they 
 introduce into your theoretic free system of 
 government. Acts of Parliament passed by 
 a " freely-elected" House of Commons, and an
 
 A DIGRESSION. ja 
 
 hereditary House of Lords under the threats 
 of freely-electing citizens, however pure in 
 intention and correct in principle, will not 
 seem to him to be the resultants of every wish 
 in the community so much as dictations by 
 superior strength. To these the obedience he 
 will render will not be the loving assent of his 
 heart, but a begrudged concession to circum- 
 stance. Your awe-invested legislature is not 
 viewed as his friend and brother-helper, but 
 his tyrant. Therefore the most natural bent 
 of his workman-statemanship — a rough, bung- 
 ling affair — will be to tame you — you who 
 ought to be his Counsellor and Friend. When 
 he finds that your legislative action exerts 
 upon him a repressive and restraining force 
 he will curse you as its author, because he 
 sees not the springs you are working. Should 
 ho even be a little more advanced in know-
 
 20 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 ledge than our friend Ginx, and learn that he 
 helps to elect the Parliament to make laws on 
 behalf of himself and his fellow-citizens, he 
 will scarce trust the assembly which is sup- 
 posed to represent him. Will he, like a good 
 citizen and a politic, accept with dignity and 
 self-control the decision of a majority against 
 his prejudices : or will he not regard the whole 
 Wittenagemote with suspicion, contempt, or 
 even hatred ? See him rush madly to Trafalgar 
 Square meetings, Hyde Park demonstrations, 
 perhaps to Lord George Gordon riots, as if 
 there were no less perilous means of publish- 
 ing his opinions ! There Avily men may lead 
 his unconscious intellect, and stir his passions, 
 and direct his forces against his own and his 
 children's good. 
 
 Did it ever occur to you, or any of you, how 
 many voters cannot read, and how many
 
 A DIGRESSION. 21 
 
 more, though they can read, are unable to 
 apprehend reasons of statesmanship ? — that 
 even newspapers' cannot inform them, since 
 they have not the elementary knowledge 
 needed for the comprehension of those things 
 which are discussed in them ; nay, that for 
 want of understanding the same they may 
 terribly distort political aims and conse- 
 quences ? 
 
 Might it not be worth while for you, 
 gentlemen — may it not be your duty to devise 
 ways and means for conveying such elemen- 
 tary instruction by good street-preachers on 
 politics and economy, or even political bible- 
 women or colporteurs, and so to make clear to 
 the understanding of every voter what are the 
 reasons and aims of every act of Legislation, 
 Home Administration, and Foreign Policy? 
 If you do not find out some way to do this he
 
 22 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 may turn round upon 3'ou — I hope he may — 
 and insist on annually-elected parliaments, 
 and thus oblige ambitious 'state-mongers, in 
 the rivalry of place, to come to him and 
 declare more often their wishes and objects. 
 Other attractions may be found in that solu- 
 tion : such as the untying of some knots of 
 electoral difficulty, and removing incitements 
 to corruption. Ten thousand pounds for one 
 year's power were a high price even to a 
 contractor. Think then whether at any cost 
 some general political education must not be 
 attempted, since there is a spirit breathing on 
 the waters, and how it shall convulse them is 
 no indifferent matter to you or to me. Every- 
 where around us are unhewn rocks stirred 
 with a strange motion. Leave these chaotic 
 fragments of humanity to be hewn into rough 
 shape by coarse artists seeking only a petty
 
 REASONS AND RESOLVES. 23 
 
 profit, unhandy, immeasurably impudent ; or 
 dress them by your teaching- — teaching which 
 is the highest, noblest, purest, most efficient 
 function of Government, which ought to be the 
 most lofty ambition of statesmanship — to be 
 civic corner-stones polished after the simili- 
 tude of a palace. 
 
 * ♦ 
 
 * 
 
 V. — Reasons and Resolves. 
 
 GnSTX has been waiting through three chapters 
 to explain his truculence upon the birth of 
 his twelfth child. Much explanation is not 
 necessary. When he looked round his nest 
 and saw the many open mouths about him, 
 he might well be appalled to have another 
 added to them. His children were not cha- 
 meleons, yet they were already forced to 
 be content with a proportion of air for their
 
 24 G I NX's BABY. 
 
 food. And even the air was bad. They 
 were pallid and pinched. How they were 
 clad will ever be a mystery, save to the poor 
 woman who strung the limp rags together 
 and Him who watched the noble patience 
 and sacrifice of a daily heroism. Of her own 
 unsatisfied cravings, and the dense motherly 
 horrors that sometimes brooded over her 
 while she nursed these infants, let me refrain 
 from speaking, since if as vividly depicted 
 as they were real, you, Madam, could not 
 endure to read of them. Her poor, unintel- 
 ligent mind clung tenaciously to the contro- 
 verted aphorism, "Where God sends mouths 
 he sends food to fill them." Believing that 
 there was a God, and that He must be kind, 
 she trusted in this as a truth, and perhaps 
 an all-seeing eye reading some quaint cha- 
 racters on her simple heart, viewed them not
 
 REASONS AND RESOLVES. 2$ 
 
 too nearly, but had regard to their general 
 import, for, as she expressed it, "Thank 
 God! they had always been able to get 
 along." 
 
 In the rush and tumult of the world it is 
 likely that the summum honum of nine-tenths 
 of mankind is embraced in that purely nega- 
 tive happiness — to get along. Not to perish: 
 to open eyes, however wearily, on a new 
 morning : to satisfy with something, no 
 matter what, a craving appetite : to close 
 eyes at night under some shadow or shelter : 
 or, it may be, in certain ranks to walk 
 another day free from bankruptcy or arrest : 
 Thank Heaven, they are just able to get along! 
 
 Convinced that another infant straw would 
 break his back, Ginx calmly proposed to 
 disconcert physical, moral, and legal rela- 
 tions by drowning the straw. Mrs. Ginx
 
 26 GINX'S BAEY. 
 
 clinging to Number Twelve listened aghast. 
 If a mother can forget her sucking child she 
 was not that mother. The stream of her 
 affections though divided into twelve rills, 
 would not have been exhausted in twenty- 
 four, and her soul, forecasting its sorrow, 
 yearned after that nonentity Number Thir- 
 teen. She pictured to herself the hapless 
 strangeling borne away from her bosom by 
 those strong arms, and — in fact she sobbed 
 so that Ginx grew ashamed, and sought to 
 comfort her by the suggestion that she could 
 not have any more. But she knew better. 
 
 * * 
 * 
 
 VI. — The Antagonism of Law and Necessity. 
 
 In eighteen months, notwithstanding re- 
 solves, menaces and prophecies, GiNX'S 
 Baby was born. The mother hid the im-
 
 LAW AND NECESSITY, 27 
 
 pending event long from the father. "WTien 
 he came to know it, he fixed his determina- 
 tion by much thought and a little extra 
 drinking. He argued thus : " He wouldn't 
 go on the parish. He couldn't keep another 
 youngster to save his life. He had never 
 taken charity and never would. There was 
 nothink to do with it but drown it ! " Female 
 friends of Mrs. Ginx bruited his intentions 
 about the neighbourhood, so that her " time " 
 was \vatched for wdth interest. At last it 
 came. One afternoon Ginx, lounging home, 
 saw signs of excitement around his door in 
 Rosemary Street. A knot of women and 
 children awaited his coming. Passing through 
 them he soon learned what had happened. 
 Poor ]Mrs. Ginx ! Without staying to think 
 or argue, he took up the little stranger and 
 bore it from the room
 
 z8 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 "O, O, O, Ginx! Ginx!!" 
 
 She would have risen, but a strong power 
 
 called weakness pulled her back. 
 
 • « * • 
 
 The man meanwhile had reached the street. 
 
 " Here he comes ! There's the baby ! He's 
 going to do it, sure enough ! " shrieked the 
 women. The children stood agape. He 
 stopped to consider. It is very well to talk 
 about drowning your baby, but to do it you 
 need two things, water and opportunity. 
 Vauxhall Bridge was the nearest way to the 
 former, and towards it Ginx turned. 
 
 "Stop him!" 
 
 "Murder!" 
 
 " Take the child from him ! " 
 
 The crowd grew larger, and impeded the 
 man's progress. Some of his fellow- workmen 
 stood by regarding the fun.
 
 LAW AND NECESSITY. 29 
 
 " Leave us aloan, naabors," shouted Ginx ; 
 "this is my own baby, and I'll do wot I 
 likes with it. I kent keep it ; an' if I've got 
 anythin' I kent keep, it's best to get rid of it, 
 ain't it? This child's goin' over Wauxhall 
 Bridge." 
 
 But the women clung to his arms and coat- 
 tails. 
 
 "Hallo! What's all this about?" said a 
 sharp, strong man, well-dressed and in good 
 condition, coming up to the crowd ; " another 
 foundling ! Confound the place, the very 
 stones produce babies. Where was it found ?" 
 
 Chorus, {recognising a deputy relieving- 
 oj/icer.) Itwarn't found at all; it's Ginx'sbaby. 
 
 Officer. Ginx's baby ? Who's Ginx ? 
 
 Ginx. I am. 
 
 Officer. Well? 
 
 Ginx. Well!
 
 30 GINX'S BABY, 
 
 Chorus. He's goin' to drown it. 
 
 Officer. Going to drown it ? Nonsense. 
 
 GiNX. I am. 
 
 Officer. But, bless my heart, that's 
 murder ! 
 
 GiNX. No 'tain't. I've twelve already at 
 home. Starvashon's sure to kill this 'un. Best 
 save it the trouble. 
 
 Chorus. Take it away, Mr Smug, he'll 
 kill it if you don't. 
 
 Officer. Stuff and nonsense ! Ouite con- 
 trary to law ! Why, man, you're bound to 
 support your child. You can't throw it off in 
 that way ;— nor on the parish neither. Give 
 me your name. I must get a magistrate's 
 order. The act of parliament is as clear as 
 daylight. I had a man up under it last week. 
 "Whosoever shall unlaw lully abandon or 
 expose any cliild, being under the age of two
 
 LAW AND NECESSITY. 3I 
 
 years whereby the life of such child shall be 
 endangered or the health of such child shall 
 have been or shall be likely to be perma- 
 nently injured (drowning comes under that 
 I think) shall be guilty of a aiisdemeanour 
 and being convicted thereof shall be liable 
 at the discretion of the court to be kept in 
 PENAL SERVITUDE for the term of three years 
 or to be imprisoned for any term not ex- 
 ceeding two years with or without hard 
 labour." 
 
 Mr. Smug, the officer, rolled out this section 
 in a sonorous monotone, without stops, like a 
 clerk of the court. It was his pride to know 
 by heart all the acts relating to his depart- 
 ment, and to bring them down upon any 
 obstinate head that he wished to crush. 
 Ginx's head, however, was impervious to an 
 act of parliament. In his then temper, the
 
 32 GINXS BABY. 
 
 Commination Service or St. Ernulphus's 
 curse would have been feathers to him. The 
 onl}^ feeling aroused in his mind by the words 
 of the legislature was one of resentment. To 
 him they seemed unjust, because they were 
 hard and fast, and made no allowance for 
 circumstances. So he said : 
 
 GiNX. D the act of parliament ! What's 
 
 the use of saying I shan't abandon the child, 
 when I can't keep it alive ? 
 
 Officer. But you're bound by law to keep 
 it alive. 
 
 GiNX. Bound to keep it alive ? How am I 
 to do it ? There's the rest on *em there 
 (nodding towards his house) little better nor 
 alive now. If that's an act of Parleyment, 
 why don't the act of Parleyment provide for 
 'em r You know what wages is, and I can't 
 get more than is going.
 
 MALTHUS AND WAN. 33 
 
 Chorus. Yes. Why don't Parleyment pro- 
 vide for 'em ? You take the child, Mr. Smug. 
 
 Officer [regardless of grammar). Me take 
 the child ! The parish has enough to do to 
 take care of foundlings and children whose 
 parents can't or don't work. You don't sup- 
 pose we will look after the children of 
 those who can ? 
 
 GiNX. Jest so. You'll bring up bastards 
 and beggars' pups, but you won't help an 
 honest man to keep his head above water. 
 This child's head is goin' under water any- 
 how!" — and he prepared to bolt, amid fresh 
 screams from the Chorus. 
 
 * * 
 
 VII.— Malthus and Man. 
 
 Two gentlemen, who had been observing the 
 excitement, here came forward. 
 
 D
 
 34 G I N X S B A B Y. 
 
 First Gentleman. This is our problem 
 again, Mr. Philosopher. 
 
 Mr. Philosopher {to Ginx). You don't 
 know what to do with your infant, my friend, 
 and you think the State ought to provide for 
 it r I understand you to say this is your 
 thirteenth child. How came you to have so 
 many ? 
 
 This question, though put with profound 
 and even melancholy gravity, disconcerted 
 Ginx, Officer, and Chorus, who united in a 
 hearty outburst of laughter. 
 
 GiNX. Haw, Haw, Haw! How came I to 
 have so many ? Why my old woman's a 
 good un and 
 
 In fact, after searching his mind for some 
 clever way of putting a comical rejoinder, 
 Ginx laughed boisterously. There are two 
 aspects of a question.
 
 MALTHUS AND MAN. 35 
 
 Philosopher. I am serious, my friend. 
 Did it never occur to you that you had no 
 right to bring children into the world unless 
 you could feed and clothe and educate them ? 
 
 Chorus. Laws a' mercy ! 
 
 GiNX. I'd like to know how I could helj) 
 it, naabor. I'm a married man. 
 
 Philosopher. Well, I will go further and 
 say you ought not to have married witnout 
 a fair prospect of being able to provide for 
 any contingent increase of family. 
 
 Chorus. Laws a' mercy ! 
 
 Philosopher [waxing warm). What right 
 had you to marry a poor woman, and then 
 both of you, with as little forethought as 
 two— a — dogs, or other brutes — to produce 
 between you such a multitudinous progeny — 
 
 GiNX. Civil words, naabor ; don't call my 
 family hard names.
 
 36 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 Philosopher. Then let me say, such a 
 monstrous number of children as thirteen ? 
 You knew, as you said just now, that wages 
 were wages and did not vary much. And 
 yet you have gone on subdividing your re- 
 sources by the increase of what must become 
 a degenerate offspring. [To the Cliorus) All 
 you workpeople are doing it. Is it not time 
 to think about these things and stop the in- 
 discriminate production of human beings, 
 whose lives you cannot properly maintain r 
 Ought you not to act more like reflective 
 creatures and less like brutes ? As if breed- 
 ing were the whole object of life! How 
 much better for you, my friend, if you had 
 never married at all, than to have had 
 the worry of a wife and children all these 
 years. 
 
 The philosopher had gone too far. There
 
 MALTHUS AND MAN. 37 
 
 were some angry murmurs among the women 
 and Ginx's face grew dark. He was thinking 
 of" all those years" and the poor creature that 
 from morning to night and Sunday to Sun- 
 day, in calm and storm, had clung to his 
 rough affections : and the bright eyes, and the 
 winding arms so often trellised over his tre- 
 mendous form, and the coy tricks and laughter 
 that had cheered so many tired hours. He 
 may have been much of a brute, but he felt 
 that, after all, that sort of thing was denied to 
 dogs and pigs. Before he could translate his 
 thoughts into words or acts a shrewd-looking, 
 curly-haired stonemason, who stood by with 
 his tin on his arm, cut into the discussion. 
 
 Stonemasox. Your doctrines won't go 
 down here, Mr. Philosopher. I've 'card of 
 them before. I'd just like to ask you what a 
 man's to do and what a woman's to do if 
 
 212910
 
 38 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 they don't marry : and if they do, how can 
 you honestly hinder them from having any 
 children r 
 
 The stonemason had rudely struck out the 
 cardinal issues of the question. 
 
 Philosopher. Well, to take the last point 
 first, there are physical and ethical questions 
 involved in it, which it is hard to discuss 
 before such an audience as this. 
 
 Stonemason. But you must discuss 'em, 
 if you wish us to change our ways, and stop 
 breeding. 
 
 Philosopher. Very well : perhaps you are 
 right. But, again, I should first have to 
 establish a basis for my arguments, by 
 showing that the conception of marriage 
 entertained by you all is a low one. It is not 
 simply a breeding matter. The beauty and 
 value of the relation lies in its educational
 
 MALTKUS AND MAN. 39 
 
 effects — the cultivation of mutual sentiments 
 and refinements of great importance to a 
 community. 
 
 Stonemason. Ay ! Very beautiful and 
 refining to ]\Ir. and Mrs. Philosopher, but 
 I'd like to know where the country would 
 have been if our fathers had held to that 
 view of matrimony ? why, ain't it in natur' 
 for all beings to pair, and have young r an' 
 you say we ain't to do it ! I think a states- 
 man ought to make something out of what's 
 nateral to human beings, and not try to 
 change their naturs. Besides, ain't there 
 good of another kind to be got out of the 
 relation of parents and children ? Did you 
 ever have a child yourself ? 
 
 GiNX [contemplating the Philosophc/ s pJiy- 
 sique). He have a youngster ! He couldn't. 
 
 Chorus. Ha! Ha! Ha!
 
 40 GINX'S BABY- 
 
 Stonemason. I don't believe in yer hum- 
 buggin' notions. They lead to lust and 
 crime ; — I'm told they do in France. If you 
 yourself haven't the human natur in you to 
 know it, I'll tell you, and we can all tell you 
 that as a rule if the healthy desires of natur 
 ain't satisfied in a honest way, they will be in 
 another. You can't stop eating by passin' an 
 act of Parleyment to stop it. And as for yer 
 /ddication and cultivation, that makes no 
 difference. We know something here about 
 yer eddicated men ; — more than they think. 
 Who is it we meet about the streets late at 
 night, goin' to the gay houses ? Some of 'em 
 stand near as high as you, but that don't alter 
 their natur. They have their passions like 
 other men ; and cddication don't keep 'em 
 down. Well, if that's the case, how can you ask 
 people of our sort to put on the curb, or make
 
 MALTHUS AND MAN. 41 
 
 US do it ? Are we to live more like beasts 
 than we are now, or do what's worse than 
 murder ? I don't see no other way. Among 
 us I tell you, sir, three-fourths of our eddi- 
 cation, is eddication of the heart. We have 
 to learn to be human, kind, self-denyin', and 
 I think this makes better men, as a rule, 
 than head-larnin' ; tho' I don't despise that, 
 neither. But you don't suppose head-citizens 
 would fight for their country like men with 
 wives and children behind 'em ; why they 
 don't even at home work for daily food like a 
 man with wife and babies to provide for ! 
 
 The stonemason was above his class — one 
 of those shrewd men that " the people called 
 Methodists " get hold of, and use among the 
 lower orders, under the name of " local - 
 preachers ; " men who learn to think and 
 speak better than their fellows. The Philo-
 
 GINXS BABY 
 
 sopher testified some admiration by listening 
 attentively, and was about to reply, but the 
 Chorus was tired, and the women would not 
 hear him. 
 
 Chorus. Best get out o' this. We don't 
 want any o' yer filhosophy. Go and get 
 childer' of yer own, kc, &:c. 
 
 The Philosopher and his friend departed, 
 carrying with them unsolved the problem 
 they had brought. 
 
 * ♦ 
 # 
 
 VIII.— The Bnby's First Translation. 
 
 The stonemason had been the hero of the mo- 
 ment; now attention centred on our own hero. 
 Ginx hurried off again, but as the crowd opened 
 before him, he was met, and his mad career 
 stayed, by a slight figure, feminine, draped in 
 black to the feet, wearing a curiou.sly Iramed
 
 THE BABYS FIRST TRANSLATION. 43 
 
 white-winged hood above her pale face, and a 
 large cross suspended from her girdle. He 
 could not run her down. 
 
 Nun. Stop, Man ! Are you mad : Give 
 me the child. 
 
 He placed the little bundle in her arms. 
 She uncovered the queer, ruby face, and 
 kissed it. Ginx had net looked at the face 
 before, but after seeing it, and the act of 
 this woman, he could not have touched a 
 hair of his child's head. His purpose died 
 from that moment, though his perplexity was 
 still alive. 
 
 Nun. Let me have it. I wall take it to the 
 Sisters' Home, and it shall live there. Your 
 wife may come and nurse it. We will take 
 charge of it. 
 
 Ginx. And you won't send it back again } 
 You'll take it for good and all ?
 
 44 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 Nun. O, yes. 
 
 GiNX. Good. Give us yer hand. 
 
 A little white hand came out from under 
 her burthen, and was at once half-crushed in 
 Ginx's elephantine grasp. 
 
 GiNX. Done. Thank'ee, missus. Come, 
 mates, I'll stand a drink. 
 
 A few minutes after, the woman of the 
 cross, who had been up to comfort the poor 
 mother, fluttered with her white wings aown 
 Rosemary Street, carrying in her arms Ginx's 
 Baby.
 
 PART IT. 
 
 WHAT CHARITY AND THE CHURCHES DID 
 WilH HIM. 
 
 I.— The Milk of Human Kindness, Mother's jNIilk, and the 
 Milk of the Word. 
 
 'T^HE early days of his residence at the 
 Home of the Sisters of Misery, in 
 Winkle Street, was the Eden of Ginx's 
 Baby's existence. Themselves innocent ot a 
 mother's experiences, the sisters were free to 
 give play to their affections in a novel 
 direction, and to assume a sort of spiritual 
 maternity that was lucky for the changeling". 
 He was nestled in kind serge-covered arms : 
 kisses rained upon him from chaste lips. A 
 slight scandal thrilled the convent upon the 
 discovery of his sex, which had of course been
 
 46 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 a pure matter oi conjecture to Sister Pudi- 
 citia when she rescued him ; but enthusiasm 
 can overcome anything. The awkward ques- 
 tions foreshadowed in the discovery were left 
 to be considered when their growing im- 
 portance should demand upon them the judg- 
 ment of the archbishop. Visions of an unusual 
 sanctity to be fostered in the pure regions of 
 the convent, and to be sent on a mission into 
 the world to attest the power of their spiritual 
 discipline, began to haunt the brains of the 
 sequestered nuns. Might not this infant be 
 an embryo saint, destined ior a great work in 
 the heretical wilderness out of which he had 
 come r How little healthy food the brains 
 must have had wherein these insane dreams 
 were excitt;d by our innocent baby ! Hardly 
 did the sacred spinsters forecast what was in 
 store for them when he should be teething.
 
 MILK OF HUMAN KINDNESS, ETC. 47 
 
 But Ginx's Baby was in a religious atmo- 
 sphere, and that is always surcharged with 
 electricity. His lot must have been above 
 that of any other human being if he could 
 long have remained in such a climate un- 
 visited by thunder. The mother had been 
 permitted to attend at the Home with the 
 same regularity as the milkman, to discharge 
 her maternal duties. Then with the rise of 
 the visionary projects just mentioned the 
 gravest doubts began to agitate the fertile 
 and casuistic mind of the Lady Superior. 
 The holier her ideal St. Ginx of the future, the 
 more to be deplored was any heretical taint in 
 the present. Holy mother ! Was it not per- 
 haps eminently perilous to his spiritual purity 
 that an unbeliever like Mrs. Ginx should bring 
 unconsecrated milk into the convent to be 
 administered to this suckling of the Church !
 
 48 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 In her uneasiness she appealed to Father 
 Certificatus, the conventual confessor. He 
 gave his opinion in the following letter : — 
 
 "Dear Sister SusnciosA, 
 
 " The very grave question you have 
 put to me has given me much anxiety. It 
 could not but do so since it occupied, I knew, 
 so fully your own holy reflections. I pondered 
 it during the night while I repeated one hun- 
 dred Aves on my knees, and I think the 
 Blessed Virgin has vouchsafed her assist- 
 ance. 
 
 " I understood you to say you thought that 
 the physical health of the infant, so singularly 
 and miraculously thrown upon your care, 
 required the offices of his heretic mother, and 
 yet that you felt how inconsistent it was with 
 the noble future we contemplate for him, that
 
 MILK OF HUMAN KINDNESS, ETC. 49 
 
 he should receive unorthodox lacteal susten- 
 tation. In this you are but following" the 
 usage of the Church in all ages, for She has 
 ever enjoined the advantage of infusing Her 
 doctrines into Her children with the mother's 
 milk. 
 
 "Three courses only appear to me to be 
 open to us. First, we may try to work upon 
 the mother's feelings, and on behalf of her 
 child induce her to avail herself of the 
 inestimable privileges of the Church in which 
 he is fostered. Secondly, should she repel us 
 — and these lower class heretics are even 
 brutally refractory — we might at least allure 
 her to allow us to make with holy water the 
 sign of the Cross upon the natural reservoirs 
 of infant nourishment each time before she 
 approaches the infant. This, besides over- 
 coming the immediate difficulty and securing 
 
 £ 
 
 ■/
 
 50 GINXS BABY. 
 
 for the child a supply of sanctified food, might 
 open the way for the entrance into her own 
 bosom of the milk of the word. Thirdly, 
 should she reject these proposals, I see no- 
 thing for it but to forbid her to have access to 
 her infant, and, commending him to the care 
 of the Holy Mother, to feed him with pap or 
 other suitable nourishment, previously con- 
 secrated by me in its crude state, and pre- 
 pared by the most holy hands of your com- 
 munity. Thus we may hope to shield the 
 young soul in its present freshness from 
 contact with carnal elements. 
 
 " Your loving Father in, &c., 
 
 *' Certificatus." 
 
 On receiving this letter the Superioress con- 
 ferred not with flesh and blood, but sent for 
 Mrs. (jiiix. 'J'hat worthy woman was not
 
 MILK OF HUMAN KINDNESS, KIC. 51 
 
 enchanted with her child's position. I have 
 hinted that her faith was simple, but in pro- 
 portion to its simplicity it was strongly-rooted 
 in her nature. 'Tis not infrequent to find it so. 
 Lengthy creeds and confessions of faith are 
 apt to extend the strength and fervour of belief 
 over too wide a surface. In the close frame 
 of some single article will be concentrated 
 the whole energy of the soul. The first 
 formula, "Repent and believe in the Lord 
 Jesus Christ," was maintained with a heat 
 that became less intense, though more dis- 
 tributed, in the assertion of an Athanasian 
 creed. Mrs, Ginx's creed was succinct. 
 
 Mrs. Ginx's Primary Creed. 
 I believe in God, gi/er of bread, meat, money, 
 and health. 
 
 'lliis she maintained, with indifferent ritual
 
 52 G I NX's BABY. 
 
 and devotional observances. But there was 
 to Mrs. Ginx's faith a corollary or secondary 
 creed, only needed to meet special emer- 
 gencies. 
 
 Mrs. Ginx's Secondary Creed. 
 
 1 . I believe in the Church of England. 
 
 2. I believe in Heaven and Hell. 
 
 3. (A negative article) I hate Popery, priests, 
 
 and the Devil. 
 
 When her husband made his fatal gift to 
 the nun, this third article of his wife's belief, 
 or unbelief, stirred up and waxed aggressive. 
 
 Said the Lady Superior, " ]\Iy good woman, 
 your child thrives under the care of Holy 
 Mother Church." 
 
 "Ycs'm,he thrives well," replies ]\Irs. Ginx, 
 repeating no more of Sister Suspiciosa's sen-
 
 MILK OF HUiMAN KINDNESS, ETC. 53 
 
 tence, " an' I've 'ad more milk than ever for 
 the darlin' this time, thank God." 
 
 "And the Holy Virgin." 
 
 " I dunno about her," cries Mrs. Ginx em- 
 phatically, perhaps not seeing congruity be- 
 tween a virgin and the subject of thankfulness. 
 
 " And the Holy Virgin," repeated the nun, 
 *' who interests herself in all mothers. She 
 has thus blessed you that your child may 
 be made strong for the work of the Church. 
 Do you not see a miracle is worked within 
 you to prove Her goodness ? This, no doubt, 
 is an evidence to you of Her wish to bless 
 you and take you for Her own. 1 beseech 
 you listen to Her voice, and come and enter 
 Her fold." 
 
 " If you mean the Virgin Mary, mum, I 
 ain't a idolater, beggin' yer parding," says 
 Mrs. Ginx; "an' tho' I wouldn't for the world
 
 54 GINXS BALY. 
 
 offend them as has been so kind to my child, 
 an' saved it from that deer little creetur bein' 
 thrown over Wauxhall Bridge — an' Ginx 
 ought to be ashamed of hisself, so he ought — 
 I ain't Papish, mum, an' I ain't dispoged, with 
 twelve on 'em there at home all Protestant 
 to the back bone, to turn Papish now, an' 
 so I 'ope an' pray, mum," says ]\Irs. Ginx, 
 roaring and crying, " you ain't agoin' to 
 make Papish of my flesh an' blood. O dear ! 
 Odear!" 
 
 The Lady Superior shut her ears ; she had 
 raised a familiar spirit and could not lay it. 
 She temporised, 
 
 "You know your husband has given the 
 child to us. It will be called the infant 
 Ambrosius." 
 
 "Dear, dear!" sighed Mrs. Ginx, "what a 
 name !"
 
 MILK OF HUMAN KINDNESS, ETC. 55 
 
 " We wish him to be kept from any worldly 
 taint, and by-and-by his saintliness may gain 
 you forgiveness in spite of your heretical 
 perversity. I cannot permit you to give him 
 unconsecrated milk, and as we wish to treat 
 you kindly, the holy Father Certificatus has 
 allowed me to make an arrangement with 
 you, to which you can have no objection — I 
 mean, that you should let me make the sign 
 of the cross upon your breasts morning and 
 evening before you suckle your infant. You 
 will permit me to do that, won't you ?" 
 
 Conceive of Mrs. Ginx's reply, clothed in 
 choice Westminster English : it asserted her 
 readiness to cut off" her right hand, her feet, 
 to be hanged, drowned, burned, torn to pieces, 
 in fact to withstand all the torments ascribed 
 by vulgar tradition to Roman Catholic in- 
 genuity, and to see her baby "a dead corpse"
 
 56 GINX'S FABY. 
 
 into the bargain, before she would submit 
 her Protestant bosom to such an indignity. 
 
 " No, mum ! " she said ; " I couldn't sleep 
 with that on my breast;" and cried hysteri- 
 cally. 
 
 This lower class heretic was " brutally re- 
 fractory." So thought the superioress, and 
 so gave Mrs. Ginx notice to come no more. 
 She went home rather jubilant — she was a 
 martyr. 
 
 * « 
 
 * 
 
 II. — The Protestant Detcctoial Association. 
 
 GiNX's Baby was now fed on consecrated pap. 
 But his mother was not a woman to be silent 
 under her wrongs. From her husband she 
 hid them, because the subject was forbidden. 
 She poured out her complaint to Mrs. Spittal 
 and other Protestant matrons. Thus it came
 
 DETECTORAL ASSOCIATION. 57 
 
 to pass that one day, in Ginx's absence, the 
 good woman was surprised by a visit from 
 a " gentleman." lie was small, sharp, rapid, 
 dressed in black. He opened his business 
 at once. 
 
 " Mrs. Ginx ? Ah ! I am the agent of the 
 Protestant Detectoral Association." 
 
 Mrs. Ginx wiped her best chair and set it 
 for him. 
 
 "By great good fortune the secretary re- 
 ceived only half an hour ago intelligence of 
 the shocking instance of Papal aggression 
 of which you have been the victim." 
 
 To hear her case put so grandly was honey 
 to Mrs. Ginx. 
 
 " Well now," continued the little man, " we 
 are ready to render you every assistance to 
 save your child from the claws of the Great 
 Dragon. I wish to know the exact circum-
 
 58 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 stances — let me see — (opening a large pocket 
 book) I have this memorandum : the child was 
 carried off from his mother's bedside in broad 
 
 daylight by a nun accompanied by kvo priests and 
 a large body of Irish : is that a correct ver- 
 sion ?" 
 
 " Law, no, sir, it warn't quite like that," 
 said Mrs. Ginx. " We've 'ad so many on 'em 
 that Ginx was for drownin' the thirteenth " — 
 — The little man opened his eyes 
 
 " An' he went an' gave it away, sir," said 
 she crying, " to a nun, sir — ah ! ah ! ah ! — 
 they won't let me see the darlin' now, sir — 
 ah ! ah ! ah ! because I won't let Alissis 
 Spishyosir mark me with the cross, sir, an' 
 me with as line a breast o' milk as ever was 
 ior 'im, sir — ah ! ah ! ah ! " 
 
 "Hem!" said the little man, "that's dif- 
 ferent from what I understood."
 
 DETECTORAL ASSOCIATION. 59 
 
 He was quite honest, but who does not 
 know how disappointing it is to find a wrong 
 you wish to redress is not so bad as you had 
 hoped ? 
 
 However, it looked bad enough, and might 
 be made worse. It was the very case for the 
 Protestant Detectoral Association. 
 
 "Would Mr. Ginx not join in an effort to 
 recover his child r " 
 
 " No, sir ; I should think not : he went an' 
 gave it away." 
 
 " I know ; but he is a Protestant ? " 
 
 " I don't think he be much o' anything, sir. 
 I know he hate priests like pison, but he don't 
 care about these things as I do." 
 
 " Oh ! I see." Writes in his memorandum 
 book — Jnishand indifferent 
 
 " But don't you think he w^ould help you to 
 get the child back again r "
 
 6o GINX'S BABY. 
 
 "No, sir. I wouldn't speak of it to him for 
 the world. He'd knock any one down if they 
 was to mention the child to him." 
 
 The little man mentally determined not to 
 see Ginx. 
 
 " Well ; would you like to have your child 
 back ? " 
 
 "You see, I couldn't bring it 'ere, sir. 
 Ginx won't 'avc it ; but I'd like to see it took 
 away from them nunnerys." 
 
 "Ha! very well then. We can perhaps 
 manage it for you. You would be content to 
 hand it over to some Protestant Home, where 
 it would be taken care of and you could see it 
 when you liked r " 
 
 " O yes, sir," cries Mrs. Ginx, brightening. 
 
 "Then we'll have an affidavit and apply 
 for a Habeas Corpus." 
 
 It was impossible not to be satisfied with
 
 THE SACRAMKNT OF BAPTISM. 6l 
 
 such words as these, whatever they meant, 
 and Mrs. Ginx was cheered, while the little 
 man went on his way. 
 
 « • 
 
 III. — The Sacrament of Baptism. 
 
 Mother, or "Mrs." Suspiciosa, fed Ginx's 
 Baby with holy pap. It seemed proper now 
 that he should be christened and formally 
 received into the Church. No small stir was 
 made by this ceremony, for which all the 
 resources of the convent were called into 
 action. The day selected was that sacred to 
 St. Ambrosius. The chapel was decorated 
 with flowers. Mass was celebrated, candles 
 flamed upon the altar surrounding a figure of 
 the Infant Jesus, incense was burning around
 
 62 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 the baby, sisters and novices knelt in serried 
 rows of virginity 
 
 " like cloves 
 Sunning their milky bosoms on the thatch." 
 
 Mother Suspiciosa carried the infant, clothed 
 in a pure white robe, with a red cross em- 
 broidered on its front. In the absence of the 
 natural parent a wax figure of St. Am- 
 brosius did duty for him, and another wax 
 figure stood godfather : but I dare not enter 
 into details of matters that may be looked at 
 as awfully profane, or awfully solemn, by dif- 
 ferent spectators. These things are a mys- 
 tery. 
 
 I have no hesitation about describing the 
 impious behaviour of little Ginx. Whatever 
 swaddled infant could do in the way of oppo- 
 sition, with hands, and legs, and voice, was 
 done by that embryo saint. The incense
 
 THE SACRAMENT OF BAPTISM. 63 
 
 made him cough and sputter ; the lights and 
 singing raised the very devil within him. 
 His cries drowned the prayers. He frightened 
 his conductress by the redness of his face. He 
 ruined the red cross with ejected matter. You 
 would have taken him for an infant demo- 
 niac. Mother Suspiciosa, though annoyed, 
 was encouraged. She looked ujoon this as 
 an evident testimony to little Ginx's value. 
 The Devil and St. Michael were contending 
 for his body. At length he was baptized, 
 and carried out. Credat JudcBus. He in- 
 stantly sank into a deep sleep. It was a 
 miracle : Satan had yielded to the sign of 
 the cross ! 
 
 •
 
 64 G I NX's BABY. 
 
 IV. — Law on Behalf of Gospel. 
 
 In the moment of Sister Suspiciosa's triumph, 
 the enemy was laying his train against her. 
 The little man made his report to the secre- 
 tary of the Protestant Detectoral Association. 
 This gentleman was well-born and well-bred ; 
 moved to work in this " cause " by an honest 
 hatred of superstition, priestcraft, and lies ; 
 now giving all his energies to the ambitious 
 design of pulling down the strongholds of 
 Satan. In any other matter he could act 
 coolly, and with deliberation ; — in this he 
 was an enthusiast. He had a keen Roman 
 nose. He could scent a priest anywhere in 
 the United Kingdom. He could smell Jesuitry 
 in the Queen's drawing-room, a cabinet 
 council or convocation, though he had never 
 been at either. His eye was beyond a
 
 LAW ON BEHALF OF GOSPEL. 65 
 
 falcon's ; he saw things that were invisible. 
 It penetrated through all disguises. He 
 knew a secret emissary of the Pope by the 
 cock of his hat, or the colour of his stock- 
 ings. At least, he thought so, and thou- 
 sands of persons acted on his estimate of 
 himself. 
 
 "This case," said he to the little man, 
 when he had concluded his report, " though 
 not in its first incidents so grave as we were 
 led to expect, is, in another point of view, 
 very serious. Here is a man, as you have 
 expressed it, ' indifferent ' to his child's life — 
 animal and spiritual. The mother, with a 
 true Protestant heart, and a fine breast of 
 milk, is longing to nurture her child, and to 
 deliver it from the toils of the Papacy. But 
 the husband, what's his name r . . . . Ginx — 
 Ginx ? a very bad name for a case, by the
 
 66 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 way — Ginx's case ! — this Ginx has given up 
 his child to the Sisters of Misery. How are 
 we to get it away again, without his 
 cooperation ? . . . . Well, we must try." 
 
 The solicitor of the Association was forth- 
 with summoned. When the matter had been 
 laid before him, he expressed doubts, offered 
 and withdrew courses of action, and ended by 
 suggesting that he should take the opinion of 
 counsel. 
 
 "Mr. Stigma, I suppose?" said he to the 
 secretary. 
 
 " Oh, yes. Sir Adolphus Stigma is one of 
 our principal supporters, and his son's heart 
 is thoroughly with us." 
 
 Messrs. Roundhead, Roundhead and Lol- 
 lard, drew up a case to be submitted to Mr. 
 Stigma. I will only transcribe the latter 
 paragraphs : —
 
 LAW ON BEHALF OF GOSPEL. 67 
 
 " Mr. Ginx being indifferent, and Mrs. Ginx 
 being ready to assist in regaining the custody of 
 her childy to he conveyed to a Protesta^it HomCy 
 
 '' ToU ARE REQUESTED TO ADVISE: 
 
 " I. Whether a summo7is should he taken out 
 before a magistrate against the Lady 
 Superior of the convent, for enticing away 
 or detaining the infant, tinder the 56th sect, 
 of 2/^ and 25 Vict., c. 100 ? Or, 
 
 "2. Whether the proper remedy is by a writ of 
 Habeas Corpus ? and, if so, whether it is 
 necessary that the father should he joined in 
 the proceedings or his leave obtained to pro- 
 secute them ? Or, failing these, 
 
 " 3. Whether coimsel is of opinion that this is a 
 case zvithin Talfourd's Act, ajid an appli- 
 cation might not be made to the Lord 
 Chancellor, or the Master of the Rolls, on
 
 68 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 the mother's belialf for the custody of her 
 cJiild ? Ajidy 
 "4. To advise generally 07i behalf of the infant!' 
 
 ISIr. Adolphus Stigma took ten days to 
 consider. Meanwhile, the infant Ambrosius 
 continued to thrive on conventual pap. Then 
 Mr. Stigma wrote his opinion. It was a 
 model for a barrister. You took the advice 
 at your own peril — not his. Therefore I 
 transcribe it. 
 
 " Opinion. 
 
 " I have given to this case my most careful 
 attention ; and it is one of great difficulty. 
 Having regard to the questions put to me, I 
 think — 
 
 "i. Section 56 of the Act of 24 and 25 
 Vict., c. 100, appears at lirst sight to be 
 directed against the stealing and abduction
 
 LAW ON BEHALF OF GOSPEL. 69 
 
 of children for marriage, or other improper 
 purposes. It provides that 'Whosoever shall 
 iinlazvfully, either by force or fraud, lead or 
 take away, or decoy, or entice away, or 
 detain any child, &:c., with intent to deprive 
 any parent, &c., of the possession of such 
 child' — shall be guilty of felony. It is per- 
 fectly clear, that in the case before me, the 
 infant was not, ' by force or fraud, led or 
 taken away, or decoyed, or enticed away.' 
 The statute, however, uses the word ' de- 
 tain ; ' and this, it appears to me, has much 
 the same force and intention as the previous 
 words. It is to be noted, however, that it is 
 separated from them by the disjunctive ' or ; ' 
 and, therefore, it might be argued with some 
 plausibility that any act of forceful or fraud- 
 ulent detention, after notice, by persons who 
 have originally acquired a child's custody in
 
 70 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 a lawful way, came within the section. The 
 point is new, and of great importance; 
 and if the Protestant Detectoral Association 
 feel disposed to try it, they would do so under 
 favourable circumstances in the present case. 
 Should they decide to do so, a written de-' 
 mand should be served upon the authorities 
 of the convent, by the mother, or some 
 one acting on her behalf, to give up the 
 infant. 
 
 "2. The second question is also involved 
 in difficulty. Were the father to be joined 
 in the proceedings, the writ of Habeas Cor- 
 pus would be the correct remedy. But his 
 probable refusal necessitates the inquiry 
 whether the mother can alone apply for the 
 writ. The general rule of law is, that the 
 father is entitled to the custody and dis- 
 position of his children. In Carf'idgc and
 
 LAW ON BEHALF OF GOSPEL. 7I 
 
 Cartltdge, 31, L. J., P.M. & D. 85, it was 
 held that this rule would not be generally 
 departed from by the Divorce Court ; but in 
 Barnes v. Barnes, L. R. i, P. & D. 463, the 
 court made an order, giving the custody of 
 two infant children to the mother, respondent 
 in a suit for a dissolution of marriage, on the 
 ground that the mother's health was suffering 
 from being deprived of their society, and that 
 they were living with a stranger, and not 
 with the father. These cases were, however, 
 in the Divorce Court, and do not apply. But, 
 as there seems to be much ground in the 
 peculiar circumstances here, for arguing that 
 the mother should have the custody of the 
 child, or, at least, that it should not be left to 
 that of persons of a different religion from 
 both parents, an application might be made 
 to the Queen's Bench to try the question.
 
 72 GINXS BABY, 
 
 "3. Should the common law remedies fail, 
 resort may perhaps be had to the powers in 
 Chancery under Talfourd's Act, but on this 
 point I should like to confer wdth an equity 
 counsel before giving a decided opinion. It 
 has been decided under this Act that the court 
 has power to give the custody of children 
 under seven to the mother. [Shillito v. 
 Colldt, 8, W. R. 683—696.) As this infant is 
 but six weeks old it comes within that case. 
 
 "4. I have no general advice to give on 
 behalf of the infant. 
 
 " Adolpiius Stigma, 
 
 "9, Plunitree Court." 
 
 If none of the courses suggested by ]\Ir. 
 Stigma was very decided, ]\Iessrs. Round- 
 head, Roundhead and Lollard were not sorry 
 to have three strings to their bow. The De-
 
 LAW ON BEHALF OF GOSPEL. 73 
 
 tectoral Association were •^'ood clients ; most 
 of their funds went into their lawyers' pockets. 
 It was part of their policy to be litigious. 
 Thereby the world was kept alive to the 
 existence of Papacy within its bosom. Who 
 shall say the Association were wrong ? Some 
 healthy daylight was occasionally let in upon 
 the mysteries of Jesuitism, and there are 
 people who think that worth while at the risk 
 of a chance injustice. Though the Devil 
 should not get his due few would give him 
 any sympathy. 
 
 The solicitor at once instructed Mr. Dig- 
 nam Bailey, Q.C., to apply with Mr. Stigma 
 to a magistrate for a summons. Mr. Bailey, 
 Q.C., was not chosen for his partialities. In 
 religious matters he was a perfect Gallio ; but 
 he was like St. Paul in one particular, he 
 could be all things to all men.
 
 74 GIXXS BABY. 
 
 V. ^Magistrate's Law. 
 
 The personnel of the magistrate to whom 
 Mr. Dignam Bailey, Q.C., (with him Mr. 
 Adolphus Stigma), applied in the case of re 
 an infant, exparie Ginx, is not material to 
 this history. He was like his fellow stipen- 
 diaries — mild as to humour, vigilant in his 
 duties, opinionated in his views, resenting 
 the troublesome intrusion into his court 
 of a barrister, apt to treat him with 
 about one-eighth of the courtesy extended 
 to the humblest junior by the Queen's 
 Bench, and curiously unequal both with him- 
 self and his brother magistrates in adjusting 
 punishment. It will be most convenient 
 to insert the rcjoort of the Daily Electric 
 Meteor : —
 
 magistrate's law. 75 
 
 " Westminster. 
 
 "Mr. Dignam Bailey, Q.C., (with whom was 
 ]\Ir. Adolphus Stigma), applied for a sum- 
 mons against Mary Dens, commonly called 
 SisterSuspiciosa, of the convent of the Sisters 
 of Misery, in Winkle Street, for abducting 
 and detaining a male child of John Ginx 
 and Mary his wife. 
 
 " Mr. D' Acerbity. On whose behalf do 
 you apply ? 
 
 " The learned counsel stated that he was 
 instructed by the Protestant Detectoral As- 
 sociation to apply on behalf of the mother. 
 The case was also watched by the solicitors 
 of the Society for Preventing the Suppression 
 of Women and Children. 
 
 *'Mr. D' Acerbity. Does the father join in 
 the application ?
 
 76 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 " Mr. Bailey. No, sir. 
 
 " Mr. D' Acerbity. Why ? He ought to be 
 joined if living. 
 
 " ]\Ir. Bailey. Perhaps you will allow me, 
 sir, to state the case. The circumstances are 
 peculiar. The fact is 
 
 "Mr. D'Acerbity. I cannot understand 
 why the father should not be represented if the 
 child has been abducted. Where was it taken 
 from. ? 
 
 "]\Ir. Bailey proceeded to state that the 
 child had been taken by a nun from No. 
 5, Rosemary Street, without the mother's 
 consent, and was now imprisoned in the con- 
 vent. The father appeared to be indifferent, 
 or to have given a sort of general acquies- 
 cence. This was Mrs. Ginx's thirteenth 
 child, around v.'hom [>athcrcd the concen- 
 trated affections 
 
 " Mr. D'Acerbity itn/jn-iiNing the lcar7ied
 
 MAGISTRATES LAW. 77 
 
 ge?itleman). We have no time for sentiment 
 here, Mr. Bailey. If the father consented, 
 can you call it abduction ? It looks like re- 
 duction. [Laughter). 
 
 "Mr. Bailey called attention to the conso- 
 lidated statutes of criminal law, and said he 
 was going for illegal detention rather than 
 abduction, and argued at great length from 
 section 56. At the conclusion of the argu- 
 ment, after refusing to hear Mr. Stigma, 
 
 " Mr. D'Acerbity said that the case clearly 
 did not come within the section, and he was 
 afraid the learned counsel knew it. The 
 father had been a consenting party, on the 
 counsel's own statement, to the child's re- 
 moval, and no suggestion had been made 
 that he had withdrawn his consent. He 
 should refuse a summons. 
 
 "Mr. Bailey endeavoured to address the 
 magistrate but was stopped.
 
 78 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 " ]\Ir. D'Acerbity. I have no more to say. 
 You can apply to the Queen's Bench. I have 
 no sympathy with you whatever." 
 
 !Mr. D' Acerbity's law was good, but what 
 has justice to do with " sympathies r" Surel}^ 
 the day after this report appeared the magis- 
 trate must have had a letter from the Home 
 
 Secretary ? 
 
 * * 
 * 
 
 VI. Popery and Protestantism in the Queen's Bench. 
 
 The application to the mag^istrate was far 
 from satisfactory. There had not even been 
 an exposure, and the Windmill Bulletin 
 gaily bantered the Detectoral Association. 
 Meanwhile had happened the grand christ- 
 ening, of which a circumstantial account was 
 in the hands of the council of the Detectoral 
 Association shortly after the ceremony had
 
 Xo 
 
 POPERY AND PROTESTANTISM. 79 
 
 been performed. Here was a monstrous in- 
 dignity to a Protestant child ! The account 
 was« at once printed, together with a verba- 
 tim report of the application to the magis- 
 trate as well as one of " a conversation held 
 with the mother by an agent of the Asso- 
 ciation." Board -men paraded the great 
 thoroughfares carrying this appeal : — 
 
 PROTESTANT DETECTORAL ASSOCIATION. 
 
 NO POPERY! 
 
 Abduction of an Infant ! 
 
 Assault on the Liberty of tlie Subject ! 
 
 Mysterious and Awful Proceedin<,'s ! 
 
 Baptism of a Protestant Child in a Convent ! 
 
 OUTRAGE 
 Upon the Nation by Foreign ^Mercenaries ! 
 
 Every Father and Mother is Invited to Co-operate in 
 Alaintaining the 
 
 PROTESTANT RELIGION, 
 
 The Sanctity of Home, and the Inviolability of 
 
 BRITISH FREEDOM ! 
 
 NO SURRENDER!
 
 8o GINX'S BABY. 
 
 If there was no coherency in this produc- 
 tion, it should be noted how little that is of 
 the essence of popular appeal. The metro- 
 polis was in an uproar. Meetings were held, 
 subscriptions poured in, dangerous crowds 
 collected in Winkle Street. When Mr. Diof- 
 nam Bailey, Q.C., went down to Westmin- 
 ster to move the Court of Queen's Bench, 
 multitudes besieged it. Protestant cham- 
 pions and Papal ecclesiastics vied in their 
 efforts to get seats. The writ had gone from 
 judge's chambers returnable to the full court. 
 Sister Suspiciosa, bearing the infant Am- 
 brosius, and supported by two novices and 
 Father Certificatus, had been smuggled into 
 court through mysterious passages in its rear. 
 Mrs. Ginx also, brought from Rosemary 
 Street by the little man, who provided her 
 with a bonnet trimmed with orange-coloured
 
 POPKRY AND PROTESTANTISM, 8l 
 
 ribbons, sat staring with red eyes at her 
 child, now enveloped in a robe that was em- 
 broidered with little crosses. 
 
 Why need I tell you, how dead silence fell 
 upon the Court after the stir caused by the 
 entrance of the judges ; how everybody knew 
 what was coming when a master beneath the 
 bench rose, and called out, " Re Ginx, an 
 infant, Exparfe Mary Ginx ! " How the Chief 
 Justice, fresh and rosy-looking, then blew 
 his nose in a delicate mauve-coloured silk 
 handkerchief: how he tried and discarded 
 half-a-dozen pens, amid breathless silence : 
 how in his blandest manner he said: "Who 
 appears for the Respondent?" and Mr. Dig- 
 nam Bailey, Q.C., and Mr. Octavius Ernes- 
 tus, Q.C., rose together to say that ]\Ir. 
 Ernestus did ! 
 
 Mr. Ernestus was a Catholic. He was
 
 S2 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 assisted by half-a-dozen counsel. He rid- 
 dled the affidavits on the other side, and read 
 voluminous ones on his own ; bitterly animad- 
 verted upon the absence of an affidavit by the 
 father ; held up to the scorn of a civilized 
 world the course pursued towards his meek 
 and gentle clients by the "fanatical zealots 
 of the Protestant Detectoral Association ; " in 
 moving tones referred to the shrinking of 
 " quiet recluses, from the gaze of a rude, un- 
 sympathising world;" cited cases from the 
 time of ]\Iagna Charta, down ; called upon 
 the Court to vindicate Protestant justice, 
 ending his peroration with the aphorism of 
 Lord iSIansfield, Fial Jiisiitia mat avium. 
 
 One cannot do justice to Mr. Dignam 
 Bailey's argument, when after lunch he rose 
 to reply. lie was logical and passionate, 
 vindictive and pathetic by turns. He in-
 
 POPERY AND PROTESTANTISM. 8;^ 
 
 veighed against the Lady Superior, against 
 her attorneys, against Father Certificatus, 
 against Ginx, — "craven to his heaven-born 
 rights of political and religious freedom," — 
 against the Roman Catholic religion, the 
 Pope, the Archbishop of Westminster, the 
 Virgin Mary. The Court knew, and every 
 one else knew, that this was pure pyrotechny, 
 and ]\Ir. Bailey knew that best of all ; but, 
 though the Bench is swift to speak, slow to 
 hear, it felt obliged, in a case of this public 
 interest, to sit by, and be witnesses of the 
 exhibition. Mr. Bailey concluded by a play 
 on the aphorism cited by his learned friend. 
 " He would say that if such justice were to be 
 done, as his friend had urged, the Kingdom 
 of Heaven in England would rush to its fall." 
 The Court at once decided that, as the 
 father had confided the custody of the infant
 
 84 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 to the Sisters of ^Misery, and did not appear 
 to desire that it should be withdrawn, they, 
 disregarding the religious clouds in which the 
 subject had been too carefully involved on 
 both sides, gave judgment for the defendant, 
 with costs. 
 
 As they passed out of Court, ]\Ir. Stigma 
 said to his clients, " Quite as I anticipated ; 
 you remember I told you so in my Opinion." 
 
 » 
 
 VII. — A Protestor, but not a Protestant. 
 
 The infant Ambrosius and his conductors 
 could scarcely reach the convent in safety. 
 The building showed few windows to the 
 street, but they were all broken. What 
 might have happened in a few days, but that 
 Ginx's Baby took the matter into his own 
 handsj none can say.
 
 PROTESTOR, BUT NOT PROTESTANT. 85 
 
 The treatment to which the little saint was 
 subjected soured his temper. His kind nurses 
 had choked him twice a day with incense, 
 and now he had inhaled for seven hours the 
 air of the Queen's Bench. On his return to 
 the convent he was hastily fed, and carried 
 to the chapel to give thanks for the victory of 
 the day. Wrapped in a handsome chasuble, 
 they laid him on the steps of the altar. In the 
 most solemn part of the service he coughed, 
 and grew sick. The chasuble was bespattered. 
 When the officiating priest, to save that gar- 
 ment, took the child in his arms, he nefariously 
 polluted the sacerdotal vestments and the 
 altar steps. Then he kicked toward the altar 
 itself, roared lustily, and finally went into 
 convulsions in Sister Suspiciosa's arms. Like 
 most women, the Lady Superior required her 
 enthusiasm to be fed with success. She
 
 86 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 began to think that she had been cozened : 
 Ginx's Baby was too evidently a spiritual 
 miscarriage. He must, like the rest of his 
 family, be, indeed, "Protestant to the back- 
 bone." Father Certificatus agreed with her. 
 His robes and best chasuble were befouled. 
 
 "Let us not risk a repetition of this con- 
 duct," said he ; " let the child be given up. 
 He is baptized, and cannot be severed from 
 the Church. He will return after many days." 
 Next morning the solicitors of the Pro- 
 testant Detectoral Association received a 
 letter from their opponents. In this they 
 said that — presuming Messrs. Roundhead, 
 Roundhead, and Lollard, intended to apply 
 to the Master of the Rolls, the authorities 
 of the convent had decided, after having 
 vindicated themselves in the Queen's Lcnch, 
 to give up the child, which would be, for
 
 LOVING ONE ANOTHER. 87 
 
 twenty-four hours, at the order and disposal 
 of the Association, and afterwards of his 
 parents. " We are instructed by our clients," 
 they added, " to ask you to bear in mind that 
 the child has been admitted, and is a member 
 of the Catholic Church, owing allegiance 
 to the Holy Father at Rome, a bond from 
 which only the Papal excommunication can 
 
 absolve him." 
 
 * * 
 
 VIII. — " See how these Christians love one another." 
 
 A MASS-MEETING of Protestants had been 
 summoned for three o'clock on the day 
 designated in the letter of the Papist at- 
 torneys, to be held in the Philopragmon 
 Hall. That was the favourite centre of 
 countless movements, both well-meant and 
 well-executed, and of others as futile as they
 
 88 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 were foolish. Yet one could not say that 
 a larger proportion of the latter were con- 
 nected with the Hall than existed in as 
 many other human enterprises of any sort. 
 The concession of the Romanists at first 
 dashed the managers of the demonstration. 
 Their grievance was gone. Still there re- 
 mained topics for a meeting: they would 
 rejoice over victory, and consult about the 
 future of the Protestant Baby. 
 
 The Secretary was an old hand at these 
 meetings. He planned to import into this 
 one a sensation. Ginx's Baby, brought from 
 the convent, stripped of his papal swathings 
 and enveloped in a handsome outfit presented 
 by an amiable Protestant duchess, was 
 placed in a cradle with his head resting 
 on a Bible. I am afraid he was quite as 
 uncomfortable as he had ever been at the
 
 lovinTt one another. 8o 
 
 convent. When, at the conclusion of the 
 chairman's speech, in which he informed 
 the audience of their triumph, this exhibi- 
 tion was deftly introduced upon the plat- 
 form, the huzzas, and clappings, and waving 
 of handkerchiefs were such as even that 
 place had never seen. The child was as- 
 tounded into quietness. 
 
 Mr. Trumpeter took the chair — believed 
 by many to be, next to the Queen, the most 
 powerful defender of the faith in the three 
 kingdoms. I never could understand why the 
 newspapers reported his speeches — I cannot. 
 
 When he had done. Lord Evergood, " a 
 popular, practical peer, of sound Protestant 
 principles," as the Daily Banner alliteratively 
 termed him next morning, rose to move the 
 first resolution, already cut and dried by the 
 committee —
 
 90 GINXS BABY. 
 
 *'That the infant so happily rescued from 
 the incubus of a delusive superstition, should 
 be remitted to the care of the Church 
 Widows' and Orphans' Augmentation So- 
 ciety, and should be supported by voluntary 
 contributions." 
 
 Before Lord Evergood could say a word 
 murmurs arose in every part of the hall. He 
 was a mild, gentlemanly Christian, without 
 guile, and the opposition both surprised and 
 frightened him. He uttered a few sentences 
 in approval of his proposition, and sat down. 
 
 An individual in the gallery shouted — 
 " Sir ! I rise to move an amendment ! " 
 
 Cheers, and cries of " Order ! order ! Sit 
 down ! " &c. 
 
 The Chairman, with groat blandness, said: 
 *'The gentleman is out of order ; the resolu- 
 tion has not yet been seconded. I call upon
 
 LOVING ONE ANOTHER. 9I 
 
 the Rev. Mr. Valpy to second the resolu- 
 tion." 
 
 Mr. Valpy, incumbent of St. Swithin's- 
 within, insisted on speaking, but what he 
 said was known only to himself. When 
 he had finished there was an extraordinary 
 commotion. On the platform many ministers 
 and laymen jumped to their feet ; in the hall 
 at least a hundred aspirants for a hearing 
 raised themselves on benches or the con- 
 venient backs of friends. 
 
 The Chairman shouted, "Order! ORDER, 
 gentlemen ! This is a great occasion ; let us 
 show unanimity ! " 
 
 There seemed to be an unanimous desire 
 to speak. Amid cheers, cries for order, 
 and Kentish fire, you could hear the Rev. 
 IMark Slowboy, Independent, the Rev. Hugh 
 Quickly, Wesleyan, the Rev. Bereciah Calvin,
 
 C2 GINXS BABY. 
 
 Presbyterian, the Rev. Ezekiel Cutwater, 
 Baptist, calling to the chair. 
 
 A lull ensued, of which advantage was 
 taken by ]\Ir. Stentor, a well-known Hyde 
 Park orator, who bellowed from a friend's 
 shoulders in the pit, "]\Ir. Chairman, hear 
 vie ! " an appeal that was followed by roars 
 of laughter. 
 
 What was the matter ? Why the proposal 
 to hand over the baby to an Anglican refuge 
 stirred up the blood of 'fevery Dissenter pre- 
 sent. It was lifting the infant out of the 
 frying-pan and dexterously dropping him 
 into the fire. But the chairman was accus- 
 tomed to these scenes. He stayed the tumult 
 by proposing that a representative from each 
 denomination should give his opinion to the 
 audience. *' Wliom would they have first r" 
 
 The loudest cries were for j\Ir. Cutwater,
 
 LOVING ONE ANOTHER. 93 
 
 who stood forth — a weak, stooping, half-halt- 
 ing, little man, with a limp necktie, and 
 trousers puffy at the knees — but with honest 
 use of them, let me say. It is quite credible 
 that if Dr. Watts's assertion be true that — 
 
 " Satan trembles when he sees 
 The weakest saint upon his knees," 
 
 that arch-enemy was unusually perturbed 
 when Ezekiel Cutwater was upon his. On 
 these he had borne manly contests with 
 evil. Two things — yea, three — were rigid 
 in Ezekiel's creed ; fire would never have 
 burned them out of him : hatred of Popery, 
 contempt of Anglican priestcraft and apos- 
 tolic succession, and adhesion to the dogma 
 of adult baptism and total immersion. Who- 
 so should not join with him in these let him 
 be Anathema Maranatha. 
 
 His eye kindled as he looked at the seeth-
 
 94 G I N X S B A B Y. 
 
 ing audience. " Sir," said he, " I beg to 
 move an amendment to the motion ot the 
 noble lord. (Cheers.) That motion proposes 
 to transfer to the care of the Established 
 Church this tender and unconscious infant 
 (bending over Ginx's Baby), just snatched 
 from the toils of a kindred superstition. (Oh, 
 oh, hisses and cheers.) I withdraw the expres- 
 sion ; I did not mean to be offensive. (Hear.) 
 This is a grand representative meeting — not 
 of the English Church, not of the Baptist 
 Church, not of the Wesleyan Church — but of 
 Protestantism. (Cheers and Kentish fire.) 
 In such an assembly is it right to propose 
 any singular disposition of a representative 
 infant? This is now the adopted child, not 
 of one, but of all denominations. (Cheers.) 
 Around his, or her — I am not sure which 
 — cherubic head circle the white- winged
 
 LOVING ONE ANOTHER. 95 
 
 angels of various Churches, and on her or 
 him, whichever it may be " 
 
 The Chairman said that he might as well 
 say that he had authentic information that it 
 was him. 
 
 "Him then — concentrate the sympathies 
 of every Protestant heart. Let us not despoil 
 the occasion of its greatness by exhibiting 
 a narrow bigotry in one direction ! Let us 
 bring into this infantile focus the rays of 
 Catholic unity. (Loud cheering and Kentish 
 fire.) To me, for one, it would be eminently 
 painful to think — what doubtless would occur 
 if the motion is adopted — that within a week 
 of his entrance into the asylum of the society 
 named in it, this diminutive and unknowing 
 sinner should go through the farce of a 
 supposititious admission into the Church of 
 Christ. (Oh !) Yes ! I say a farce, whether
 
 g6 GINX'S BAEY. 
 
 5^ou regard the age of the acol3^te or the 
 indifferent proportion of water with which 
 it would be performed. (Uproar, oh, oh! 
 and some cheering from the Baptist section.) 
 But I will not now further enter into these 
 things," said ]\Ir. Cutwater, who knew his 
 cue perfectly well, " I can hold these opinions 
 and still love my brethren of other denomi- 
 nations. I move, as an amendment, that a 
 committee, consisting of one minister and 
 one layman to be selected from each of the 
 Churches, be appointed to take charge of the 
 physical well-being and mental and spiritual 
 training of the infant." 
 
 By this proposition, which was received 
 with enthusiasm, Ginx's Baby was to be in- 
 continently pitched into an arena of polemical 
 warfare. Every one was willing that a com- 
 mittee should fight out the question vicari-
 
 LOVING ONE ANOTHER. 97 
 
 ously; and, therefore, when Mr. Slowboy 
 seconded the amendment, it was carried with 
 loud acclamations. 
 
 But they were not yet out of the wood. 
 On proceeding to nominate members of 
 the committee, the Unitarians and Quakers 
 claimed to be represented. The platform 
 and the meeting were by the ears again. It 
 was fiercely contended that only Evangelical 
 Christians could have a place in such a work, 
 and many of the nominees declared that they 
 would not sit on a committee with — well, 
 some curious epithets were used. The Uni- 
 tarians and Quakers took their stand on the 
 Catholic principles embodied in the amend- 
 ment, and on the fact that Ginx's Baby had 
 now " become national Protestant property." 
 Mr. Cutwater and a few others, moved by 
 the scandal of the dispute, interfered, and the 
 
 H
 
 98 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 committee was at length constituted to the 
 satisfaction of all parties. It was to be 
 called "The Branch Committee of the Pro- 
 testant Detectoral Union for promoting the 
 Physical and Spiritual Well-being of Ginx's 
 Baby." 
 
 A fourth resolution was adopted, "That 
 che subject should be treated in the Metro- 
 politan pulpits on the next Sabbath, and a 
 collection taken up in the various churches 
 for the benefit of the infant." This promised 
 well for Master Ginx's future. 
 
 The meeting had lasted five hours, and 
 while they were discussing him the child 
 grew hungry. In the tumult every one had 
 forgotten the subject of it, and now it was 
 over, they dispersed without thought of 
 him. But he would not allow those near 
 him at all events to overlook his presence.
 
 LOVING ONE ANOTHER. 99 
 
 Some, foreseeing that awkwardness was im- 
 pending, slipped away; while three or four 
 stayed to ask what was to be done with him. 
 
 " Hand him over to the custody of the 
 Chairman," said a ]\Ir. Dove. 
 
 " I should be most happy," said he, 
 smoothly, "but Mrs. Trumpeter is out of 
 tow^n. Could your dear wife take him, 
 Mr. Dove ?" 
 
 Mr. Dove's wife was otherwise engaged. 
 
 The Secretary was unmarried— chambers 
 at Nincome's Inn. 
 
 In the midst of their distress a woman 
 who had been hanging about the hall near 
 the platform, came forward and offered to 
 take charge of him, " for the sake of the 
 cause." Every one was relieved. After her 
 name and address had been hastily noted, 
 the Protestant baby was placed in her arms.
 
 lOO GINXS BABY. 
 
 My Lord Evergood, the Chairman, the clergy, 
 the Secretary, and the mob went home re- 
 joicing. Some hours after, Ginx's Baby, 
 stripped of the duchess's beautiful robes, was 
 found by a policeman, lying on a doorstep 
 in one of the narrow streets not a hundred 
 yards behind the Philopragmon. By an 
 ironical chance he was wrapped in a copy 
 of the largest daily paper in the world. 
 
 ♦ ♦ 
 
 * 
 
 IX. — Good Samaritans, and Good-Samaritan Twopcnces. 
 
 At every breakfast-table in town next 
 morning the report of the great Protestant 
 meeting was read, and a further report, 
 in leaded type, of the discovery of Ginx's 
 Baby at a later period of the evening by a 
 policeman. A pretty comment on the pro- 
 ceedings ! The Good Samaritan put his
 
 GOOD SAMARITANS. lOI 
 
 patient on his ass and carried him to an 
 inn ; while the priest and the Levite, though 
 the latter looked at him, at least let him 
 alone. To have called a public meeting to 
 discuss his fate before deserting him, would 
 have been a refinement of inhumanity. The 
 committee were rather ashamed when they 
 met. Instant measures were taken to recover 
 the child and place him in good hands. The 
 duchess again provided baby-clothes. The 
 next Sunday sermons were preached on his 
 behalf in a score of chapels. The collections 
 amounted to ;^ 800, a sum increased by dona- 
 tions and subscriptions to the handsome total 
 of ;^ 1360 10^. 3^^. 
 
 It will be seen hereafter what the com- 
 mittee did with the baby, but I happen to 
 have an account of what became of the funds. 
 They were spent as follows, according to a
 
 102 GINXS BABY. 
 
 balance sheet never submitted to the sub- 
 scribers : — 
 
 £ s. d. 
 
 Committee-rooms . , . 45 o o 
 
 2 Secretaries employed by the 
 
 Committee . . . . 120 o O 
 
 Agents, canvassing, &c. . . 88 6 2 
 
 Printing Notices, Placards, Pam- 
 phlets, a " Daily Bulletin of 
 Health," " Life of Ginx's Baby," 
 "Protestant Babyhood, a Talc," 
 ' ' The Cradle of an Infant Martyr," 
 •* A Snatched Brand," and other 
 Works issued by the Committee . 596 13 5 
 
 Advertisements of Meetings, Ser- 
 mons, &c, ..... 261 I t 
 
 Legal Expenses . . . . 77 6 8 
 
 Stationeiy . - . . . 35 10 o 
 
 Postage, Firing, and Sundries , 27 19 2 
 
 Total /1251 16 6 
 
 This left ^108 13.9. C)\d. for the baby's keep. 
 No child could have been more thoroughly- 
 discussed, preached and written about, ad-
 
 GOOD SAMARITANS. I03 
 
 vertised, or advised by counsel ; but his 
 resources dwindled in proportion to these 
 advantages. Benevolent subscribers too 
 seldom examine the financial items of a 
 report: had any who contributed to this 
 fund seen the balance sheet they might 
 have grudged that so little of their bounty 
 went to make flesh, bone, and comfort for 
 the object of it. A cynic would tell them 
 that to look sharply after the disposal of 
 their guerdon was half the gift. Their in- 
 difference was akin to that satirised by the 
 poet — 
 
 «' Prodigus et stultus dedit quse spernit et odit." 
 
 In an age of luxury we are grown so lux- 
 urious as to be content to pay agents to do 
 our good deeds for us ; but they charge us 
 three hundred per cent, for the privilege. 
 
 « * 
 
 «
 
 I04 GI.NXS BABY. 
 
 X. — The Force — and a Specimen of its Weakness. 
 
 GiNx's Baby had been discovered by a 
 policeman swaddled in a penny paper, dis- 
 tressingly familiar to metropolitan travellers 
 by rail. To omit the details of his treatment 
 at the hands of that great institution, " The 
 Force," would be invidious. The member 
 thereof who fell in with him was walking a 
 back street, sighting doors with his bull's-eye. 
 He was provided with massive boots, so that 
 a thief could hear him coming a hundred 
 yards off; he was personally tall and un- 
 wieldy, and a dexterous commissioner had 
 invented a dress designed to enhance these 
 qualities — a heavy coat, a cart-horse belt, 
 and a round cape. He had been carefully 
 drilled not to walk more than three miles an 
 hour. He was not a little startled when the
 
 THE FORCE. I05 
 
 rays of his lamp fell upon a struggling news- 
 paper, out of which, as from a shell, came 
 mysterious cries. He took up a corner of 
 the paper and peeped in upon the face of 
 Ginx's Baby; then he occupied a quarter of 
 an hour in embarrassing reflections. A nearly 
 naked child crying in the cold ought to be 
 housed as soon as possible, but X 99 was 07i 
 his beat, and those magic words chained him 
 to certain limits. This, of course, was the rule 
 under a former commissioner, and every one 
 knows that such absurd strategy has been 
 abolished in the existing regime. At that time, 
 however, each watchman had his beat, to leave 
 which was neglect of duty, except with a 
 prisoner, and then it was neglect of all the 
 householders within the magic compass. 
 Had X 99 heard the baby crying across the 
 street, which was part of the beat of X loi,
 
 Io6 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 he would have passed on with a cheery heart, 
 for the case would have been beyond his 
 jurisdiction. Unhappily the baby was on his 
 beat, and he was delivered from the temp- 
 tation of transferring it to the other by the 
 appearance of X loi's bull's-eye not far off. 
 What was he to do ? The station was a mile 
 away — the inspector would not arrive for an 
 hour — and it would be awkward, if not undig- 
 nified, to carry on his rounds a shouting baby 
 wrapped in the largest daily paper. If he 
 left it where it was, and it perished, he might 
 be charged with murder. He was at his 
 wits' end — but having got there, he resolved 
 on the simplest process, namely to carry it to 
 the station. No provision was made by the 
 regulations of the force to protect a beat 
 casually deserted even for a proper purpose. 
 Ilence, while X 99 was absent on his errand
 
 THE FORCE. I07 
 
 of mercy, the valuable shop of Messrs. Trin- 
 kett and Blouse, ecclesiastical tailors, was 
 broken into, and several stoles, chasubles, 
 altar-cloths and other decorative tapestries 
 were appropriated to profane uses. 
 
 At the station the baby was disposed of 
 according to rule. Due entry was first made 
 in the night-book by the superintendent of 
 all the particulars of his discovery. Some 
 cold milk was then procured and poured 
 down the child's throat. Afterwards, wrapped 
 in a constable's cape, he was placed in a cell 
 where, when the door was locked, he could 
 not disturb the guardians of the peace. 
 
 The same night, in the next cell, an inno- 
 cent gentleman, seized with an apoplexy 
 in the street but entered in the charge-sheet 
 as drunk and incapable, died like a dog. 
 
 * * 
 
 »
 
 Io8 GINX'S RABV. 
 
 XI. — The Unity of the Spirit and the Bond of Peace. 
 
 When the committee met, every one dis- 
 covered his incongruity with the rest. Each 
 was disposed to treat Ginx's Baby in a dif- 
 ferent way — in other words, each wished to 
 reflect the views of his particular sect on the 
 object of their charity. They were a new 
 "Evangelical Alliance," agreed only in hatred 
 to Popery. 
 
 Finding at their first meeting that the dis- 
 cussion needed to be brought into a focus, the 
 committee appointed three of their number to 
 draw up a minute of the matters to be argued. 
 This committee reported that there arose, re- 
 specting the child, the following questions : — 
 
 "I. As touching the body: 
 
 a. AVhcrewithal he should be fed and 
 clothed t
 
 THE UNITY OF THE SPIRIT. I09 
 
 b. In what manner and fashion that 
 
 should be done ? 
 II. As touching the mind and spirit : 
 
 a. Whether he should be educated ? 
 If so, 
 
 I. What were to be the subjects of in- 
 struction ? 
 
 c. What creed, if any, should be pri- 
 
 marily taught ? 
 
 d. Should he be further baptized ? If 
 
 so, 
 
 1. Into what communion i 
 
 2. By what ceremonial?" 
 
 This programme, it appeared to its concoc- 
 tors, embraced everything that concerned 
 Ginx's Baby except his death by the act of 
 God or the Queen's enemies. No sooner was 
 the report made than adopted. Then a mem-
 
 no GINXS BABY. 
 
 ber, eager for the fray, moved the postpone- 
 ment of the first division of questions until 
 the others had been determined. Why should 
 apostles of truth trouble themselves to serve 
 tables ? These were very subordinate ques- 
 tions to them — though, I think, of first impor- 
 tance to Ginx's Baby. It was decided to 
 discuss little Ginx's future before considering 
 his present. 
 
 The ball was opened by the Venerable Arch- 
 deacon Hotten, who, amid much excitement, 
 contended that from the earliest buddings of 
 thought in an infant mind religion should 
 be engrafted upon it ; there i:ould be no edu- 
 cation worth the name that was not religious. 
 That with the A should be taught the origin, 
 and with the Z the final destiny and destruc- 
 tion, of evil. To separate education from 
 religion was to clip the wings of the heavenly
 
 THE UNITY OF THE SPIRIT. ill 
 
 dove. He asserted that the committee 
 ought at once to have the child baptized in 
 Westminster Abbey, though he was rather 
 of opinion that the previous baptism was 
 canonically valid ; that he should be taught 
 the truths of our most holy faith, and since 
 there could be no faith without a creed, and 
 the only national creed was that of the Church 
 of England, the baby should be handed over 
 to the care of a clergyman, and then be sent 
 to a proper religious school. He need not 
 say that he excluded Bugby under its then 
 profane management. 
 
 The Church was, however, divided against 
 itself, for the Dean of Triston said he would 
 give more latitude than his very reverend 
 brother. You ought not to define in an in- 
 fant mind a rigid outline of creed. In fact, 
 he did not acknowledge any creed, he was
 
 112 GINXS BABY. 
 
 not obliged to by law and was disinclined 
 to by his reason. He would rather allow the 
 inner seeds of natural light — the glorious 
 all-pervading efflorescence of the Deity in 
 all men's hearts, to grow within the young 
 spirit. The Dean was assuredly vague 
 and far less earnest than his brother 
 cleric. 
 
 The "Rev." Mr. Bumpus, Unitarian, met 
 the suggestions of the Archdeacon with rhe 
 scorn they merited. It was impossible to 
 apply to a representative child of an enlight- 
 ened age theories so long exploded. The 
 Dean had certainly come nearer the truth 
 with that broad sympathy for which he was 
 noted. He himself proposed that the child 
 should be made a model nursling of the 
 liberalism of a new era. Old things were 
 passing away; — all things had become new.
 
 THE UNITY OF THE SPIRIT. I13 
 
 Creeds were the discarded banners of a 
 mediaeval past, fit only to be hung up in 
 tlie churches, and looked at as historic 
 monuments ; never more to be flaunted in 
 the front of battle ! The education of the 
 day was that which taught a man the intro- 
 spection whereby he recognised the Divine 
 Avithin himself — under any aspect, under any 
 tuition, whether of Brahma, Confucius, or 
 Christ. Truth was kaleidoscopic, and varied 
 with the media through which it was viewed. 
 As for the child, every aspect of truth and 
 error should be allowed to play upon his 
 mind. Let him acquire ordinary school 
 learning for fifteen years, and then send him 
 to the London Universit3\ 
 
 Here the Chairman, and half-a-dozen mem- 
 bers of the committee, protested that the 
 said University was a school of the devil, 
 
 I
 
 114 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 and several interchanges of discourtesy took 
 place. 
 \y Mr. Shortt, M.P., begged to suggest, as a 
 
 matter of business, that for the present the 
 child was not capable of receiving any ideas 
 whatever, and might die, or prove to be 
 dumb, or an idiot, and so require no edu- 
 cation. Ought they not to postpone this 
 discussion until the subject was old enough 
 to be worth consideration ? 
 
 It was ]\Ir. Shortt's habit to show his 
 practical vein by business-like obstructions 
 of this kind. He had been able a score of 
 times to demonstrate to the House of Com- 
 mons how silly it was to consider proba- 
 bilities. In fact, he was opposed heart and 
 soul to prophetic legislation ; he would live, 
 legislatively, from hand to mouth. 
 
 But the committee would not allow Mr.
 
 THE UNITY OF THE SPIRIT. II5 
 
 Shortt to run away with the bone of conten- 
 tion. 
 
 The Rev. Dr. IM'Greq-or Lucas, of the 
 National Caledonian Believers, had been 
 silent too long to contain himself further. 
 This man needs some particular description 
 whenever his name is made public. Nay, 
 for this he lives, and by it, some think. At 
 all events, he appears to be equally eager 
 for rebuke and applause ; they both involve 
 notoriety, and notoriety is sure to pay. Few 
 absurdities had been overlooked by his shal- 
 low ingenuity. Simply to have invested his 
 limited mental endowments in trying to make 
 the world believe him a genius, would have 
 been only so like what many thousands are 
 doing as to have absolved him from too 
 harsh a judgment ; but he traded in peri- 
 lous stuff. Cheap prophecy was his staple.
 
 Il6 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 It was his wont to give out about once 
 in five years, that the world would shortly 
 come to an end, and, like j\Ir. Zadkiel, 
 he found people who thought their inevitable 
 disappointment a proof of his inspiration. 
 Had you heard the honeyed words dropping 
 from his lips, you would have taken him for 
 a Scotch angel, and, consequently, a rarity. 
 Could such lips utter harsh sayings, or distil 
 vanities ? Show him a priest, and you would 
 hear ! The Pope was his particular born foe ; 
 Popery his enemies' country — so he said. It 
 was safe for him to stand and throw his darts. 
 Xo one could say whether they hit or did 
 not ; while most spectators had the good will 
 to hope that they did. How he would have 
 lived if Daniel and St. John had dreamed no 
 dreams, one cannot conjecture. As it was, 
 they provided llie doctor with endless
 
 THE UNITY OF THE SPIRIT. I 1 7 
 
 openings for his fancy. Since no one could 
 solve the riddle of their prophecies, it was 
 certain that no one could disprove his 
 solutions. Yet these came so often to their 
 own disproof by lapse of time, that I can 
 only think that the good doctor hoped to die 
 before his critical periods came, or was so 
 clever as to trust the infallibility of human 
 weakness. 
 
 I describe Dr. Lucas at so great a length, 
 because it will be easier and more edifying to 
 the reader to conceive what he said, than for 
 me to recount it. He showed the Baby to be 
 one of seven mysteries. He was in favour of 
 teaching him at once to hate idolatry, music, 
 crosses, masses, nuns, priests, bishops, and 
 cardinals. The "humanities," the Shorter 
 Catechism, the Confession of Faith, and "The 
 Whole Duty of J\Ian," would, in his opinion.
 
 Il8 GINX'S BABY, 
 
 be the books to lay the groundwork in the 
 child's mind of a Christian character of the 
 highest type. 
 
 ]\Ir. Ogle, M.P., here vigorously interv^ened. 
 Said he : — • 
 
 "I can't, with all deference, agree to any 
 of these suggestions. They involve hand-to- 
 hand fighting over this baby's body. No 
 one of us is entitled to take charge of him. 
 Else why did we all unite to rescue him from 
 the nunnery ? Ke will be torn to pieces 
 among contending divines ! I think a purely 
 secular education is all that as a committee 
 we should aim at. We have but just with- 
 drawn the child from the shadow of a single 
 ecclesiastical influence — would you transfer 
 it to another ? Every Protestant denomina- 
 tion is contributing to his support, how can 
 you devote their gifts to rearing him for one ?
 
 THE UNITY OF THE SPIRIT. II9 
 
 You would have no peace ; better at once 
 treat him, as the man of Benjamin treated 
 his wife, cut him up into enough pieces to 
 send to all the tribes of Israel, summoning 
 them to the fight. I say we have nothing 
 to do with this just now; let him be edu- 
 cated in a secular academy, and let each sect 
 be free to send its agents to instruct him out 
 of school hours as they please." 
 
 The Rev. Theodoret Verity, ]\I.A., rose in 
 anger. 
 
 "Surely, sir, you cannot seriously pro- 
 pound such a scheme ! "Would you leave 
 this precious waif to be buffeted between the 
 contending waves of truth and error, in the 
 vague hope that by some lucky wind he 
 might finally be cast upon a rock of safety ? 
 I protest against all these educational here- 
 sies — they are redolent of brimstone. Truth
 
 I20 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 is truth, or there is none at all. If there 
 be any, it is our duty to impart it to this 
 immortal at the outset of his existence. 
 Secular education ! What do you mean by 
 it ? Who shall sever one question from 
 another, and call one secular and the other 
 religious ? Is not every relation and every 
 truth in some way or other connected with 
 religion:" Sec. Sec. Mr. Verity has been 
 saying the same thing any time these forty 
 years. 
 
 " Forgive me," replied Mr. Ogle, " if I say 
 that this is very vague talking. I have not 
 proposed to sever one question from another. 
 I only propose to do in a different way that 
 which is being done now by the most rigid 
 of Mr. Verity's friends. It is impossible to 
 comprehend what is meant by such a state- 
 ment as that every truth is somehow con-
 
 THE UNITY OF THE SPIRIT. i2I 
 
 nected with religion. It may be that the 
 notion — if it really is not as I suspect it to 
 be, mere verbiage and clap-trap, used by cer- 
 tain fools to mislead others — means that there 
 is some such coherency between all truths as 
 there is, for instance, between the elements of 
 the body. I would admit that, but is not 
 blood a different and perfectly severable 
 thing from bone ? Each has its place, office, 
 relation. But who would say that one could 
 not be regarded by a physicist in the largest 
 variety of its aspects apart from the other? 
 Yet the physicist comes back again to con- 
 sider with respect to each its relations to all 
 the rest! The separate study has rather 
 prepared him for more profound insight 
 into those relations. Thus it is with the 
 body of truth. In spite of Mr. Verity I 
 affirm that there are truths that have not in
 
 122 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 themselves any element of religion whatever. 
 The forty-seventh proposition of Euclid will 
 be taught by a Jesuit precisely as it is taught 
 in the London University; geography will 
 affirm certain principles and designate places, 
 rivers, mountains — that no faith can remove 
 and cast into unknown seas. These subjects 
 and others are taught in our most bigoted 
 schools in separate hours and relations from 
 religion. AVhat then do you mean by affirm- 
 ing that there can be no secular education 
 of this child — apart from religious teaching r 
 We are not likely to agree, if I may judge 
 from what I have seen, on any one method of 
 religious instruction for it, therefore I wish first 
 to fix common bounds within which our com- 
 mon benevolence may work. Well, we all go to 
 the Bible. We agree that betAveen its covers 
 lies religious truth somewhere. If you like
 
 THE UNITY OF THE SPIRIT. 12 
 
 J 
 
 let him have that — and let him have some 
 kindly and holy influences about him in the 
 way of practice and example, such as many 
 of our sects can supply many instances of. 
 Give him no catechism — let him read a creed 
 in our daily life. The articles of faith strongest 
 in his soul will be those which have crystal- 
 lised there from the combined action of truth 
 and experience, and not as it were been pasted 
 on its walls by ecclesiastical bill-posters. 
 * What is truth ? ' he must ask and answer for 
 himself, as we all must do before God. Don't 
 mistake me ; I hope I am not more indifferent 
 to religion than any here present — but I differ 
 from them on the best method of imbuing 
 the mind and heart with it. Surely we need 
 not, we cannot — it would be an exquisite 
 absurdity — pass a resolution in this com- 
 mittee that the child is to be a Calvinist!
 
 124 GINXS BABV. 
 
 Who then would agree to secure him from any 
 taint of Arminian heresy in years to come ? 
 Dare you even resolve that he shall be a 
 Christian and a Protestant ! I would not in- 
 sure the risk. But, with so many of Christ's 
 followers about me, surely, surely without 
 providing any ecclesiastical mechanism, there 
 will be testified to him simply how he may 
 be saved. Your prayers, your visits, your 
 kindly moral influence and talk, your living 
 example of a goodness derived not from dog- 
 mas but from affectionate following of a holy 
 pattern and trust in revealed mercies, your 
 pointing to that pattern and showing the 
 daily passage of these mercies will prompt 
 his search after the truth that has made you 
 what you are. Let some good woman do k-r 
 him a mother's part, but choose her for her 
 general goodness and not for the dogmas of
 
 THE UNITY OF THE SPIRIT. 1215 
 
 her church. The simpler her piety the better 
 for him I should say !" 
 
 This straightforward speech fell like a new 
 apple of discord in the midst of the committee. 
 Angry knots were formed, and the noble 
 chairman found that he could not restore 
 order. An adjournment was agreed to. 
 Luckily for the body of Ginx's Baby, he had 
 been meanwhil'e sent to a home where Pro- 
 testant money secured to him for the time 
 good living, while his benefactors were dis- 
 cussing what to do with his soul. 
 
 Surely, it were no impertinence to inter- 
 rupt this history and advert to the fact, that, 
 in the discussion just related, every one was to 
 some extent right and to some extent agreed. 
 That religious teaching was due to an iin-
 
 126 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 mortal spirit — some notion and evidence of 
 the Divine and the Great Hereafter to be con- 
 veyed to it — scarce was disputed. Nor was 
 there collision over the necessity of what is 
 called intellectual cultivation. The boy must 
 be taught something of the world in which he 
 was to live ; nay, this latter knowledge seemed 
 to be most immediately practical. As each 
 disputant fixed his eye on one or the other 
 aim that end appeared to him to be the most 
 important. Hence, by a natural lapse, they 
 came to treat subjects as antagonistic which 
 were, in fact, parallel and quite consistent. 
 The one called the others godless — the others 
 threw back the aspersion of bigotry. Then 
 came complication. What was "religion?" 
 Intellectual culture they could agree about — 
 it embraced well-known areas ; but this reli- 
 gion divided itselt into many disputable
 
 THE UNITY OF THE SPIRIT. 1 2 "J 
 
 fields. These brother Protestants were like 
 country neighbours who must encounter each 
 other at fairs, markets, meets, and balls, and 
 smile and greet, though each, at heart, is look- 
 ing savagely at the other's landmarks, and 
 most are very likely fighting bitter lawsuits 
 all the while. It was because religion meant 
 CREED to most members of the committee, 
 and because it so implies to the vast bodies 
 they represented, that they could not come to 
 terms about Ginx's Baby or any other in- 
 fantile immortal. Not always, perhaps, but 
 often, they fought for futile distinctions. Had 
 IMahomet's creed consisted of but one article. 
 There is one God^ the blood of many nations 
 might never have given testimony against 
 the creed they resented when to it he tacked 
 and Mahomet is His propJiet. Could Protes- 
 tants but consent to agree in their agreement
 
 128 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 and peacefully differ in their petty differ- 
 ences, how would the aggregated impulse of 
 a simple faith roll down before it all the 
 impediments of error ! 
 
 When Ginx's Baby had grown to a dis- 
 cretionary age, and was at all able to know 
 truth from error — supposing that to be know- 
 able — there were in the country fifty thousand 
 reverend gentlemen of every tincture of reli- 
 gious opinion who might ply him with their 
 various theories, yet few of these would be 
 contented unless they could seize him while 
 his young nature was plastic, and try to 
 imprint on immortal clay the trade-mark of 
 some human invention. 
 
 •
 
 NO FUNDS — NO FAITH, NO WORKS. 129 
 
 XII. — No Funds — no Faith, no Works. 
 
 The Committee of the Protestant Detectoral 
 Union on Ginx's Baby held twenty-three 
 meetings. They were then as far from unity 
 of purpose as w^hen they set out. Variety 
 was given to the meetings by the changing 
 combinations of members in attendance. The 
 finances were little heeded in the intensity 
 of their zeal for truth. These at length fell 
 altogether into the hands of the association's 
 secretary, and we have seen involved large 
 items of expense. The twenty-three meet- 
 ings extended over a year. At the end of 
 that time the secretary startled the com- 
 mittee by laying on the table a demand for 
 the board and keep of the Protestant baby 
 for three months, amounting to ^36; and 
 adding that the sum in hand was^i, 4^'. ^^d. 
 
 K
 
 130 GINXS BABY. 
 
 In his report he said : " No effort has been 
 spared by means of advertisements, pam- 
 phlets, tales, leaders and paragraphs in news- 
 papers and religious journals, together with 
 occasional sermons, to maintain the public 
 interest in this child ; but attention has been 
 diverted from him by the great Roman Spozzi 
 case, and the anxiety created throughout the 
 Protestant world by the recent discovery 
 made by Dr. Gooddee, of a solitary survivor 
 of the ancient Church of the Vieuxbois Pro- 
 testants in a secluded valley of the Pyrenees." 
 The secretary asked the committee to pro- 
 vide the money to discharge the baby's 
 liabilities ; but they instantly adjourned, and 
 no effort could afterwards get a quorum to- 
 gether. When the persons who had charge 
 of the Protestant foundling discovered the 
 state of affairs they began to dun the secre-
 
 IN TRANSITU. 131 
 
 tary and to neglect the child, now about 
 thirteen months old and preparing to walk. 
 Since no money appeared they sold what- 
 ever clothes had been provided for him, and 
 absconded from the place where they had 
 been farming him for Protestantism. The 
 secretary, by chance hearing of this, was dis- 
 creet enough to make no inquiries. Ginx's 
 Baby, " as a Protestant question," vanished 
 from the world. I never heard that any one 
 was asked what had been done with the 
 funds ; but I have already furnished the 
 
 account that ought to have been rendered. 
 
 * * 
 * 
 
 XIII. — In transitu. 
 
 One night, near twelve o'clock, a shrewd 
 tradesman, looking out of his shopdoor be- 
 fore he turned into bed, heard a cry which
 
 132 
 
 GINXS BABY. 
 
 proceeded from a bundle on the pavement. 
 This he discovered to be an infant wrapt 
 in a potato-sack. He was quick enough to 
 observe that it had been deftly laid over 
 a line chiselled across the pavement to the 
 corner of his house, which line he knew to 
 be the boundary between his own parish of 
 St. Simon Magus and the adjacent parish 
 of St. Bartimeus. He took note, being a 
 business man, of the exact position of the 
 child's body in relation to this line, and then 
 conveyed it to the workhouse of the other 
 parish.
 
 PART III. 
 
 WHAT THE PARISH DID WITH HIM. 
 
 I. — Parochial Knots — to be untied without prejudice. 
 
 'THHE infant borne to the workhouse of St. 
 Bartimeus was Ginx's Baby. When he 
 had been placed on the floor of the matron's 
 room, and examined by the master, that 
 official turned to the unwelcome bearer of 
 the burden. 
 
 "Did you find this child r" 
 
 "Yes." 
 
 "Where?" 
 
 " Lying opposite my shop in Nether Place." 
 
 " What's your name ?" 
 
 "Doll." 
 
 " Oh ! you're the cheesemonger. Your 
 shop's on the other side of the boundar}'', in
 
 134 GINXS BABY. 
 
 the other parish. The child ought not to 
 come here ; it doesn't belong to us." 
 
 " Yes it does : it wasn't on my side of the 
 line." 
 
 " But it was in front of 3'our house r" 
 
 "Well, the line runs crossways: it don't 
 follow the child was in our parish.'* 
 
 " Oh, nonsense ! there's no doubt about it ! 
 We can't take the child in. You must carry 
 it away again." 
 
 Mr. Snigger turned to leave the room. 
 
 "Wait a bit, sir," said Mr. Doll; "I shall 
 leave the child here, and you can do as you 
 like with it. It ain't mine, at all events. I say 
 it lay in your parish ; and if you don't look 
 after it you rnay be the worse of it. The coro- 
 ner's sure to t\y to earn his fees. Good-night." 
 
 He hurried from the room. 
 
 "Stop !" shouted the master, "I say: I don't
 
 A BOARD OF GUARDIANS. I35 
 
 accept the child. You leave it here at your own 
 risk. We keep it without prejudice, remem- 
 ber — without prejudice, sir ! — ^without " 
 
 Mr. Doll was in the street and out ot 
 
 hearing. 
 
 * * 
 * 
 
 II. — A Board of Guardians. 
 
 The Guardians of St. Bartimeus met the day- 
 after Mr. Doll's clever stratagem. Among 
 other business was a report from the master 
 of the workhouse that a child, name un- 
 known, found by Mr. Doll, cheesemonger, 
 of Nether Place, in the Parish of St. Simon 
 ]\Iagus, opposite his shop, and, as he alleged, 
 on the nearer side of the parish boundary, 
 had been left at the workhouse, and was 
 now in the custody of the matron. The 
 Guardians were not accustomed to restrain
 
 136 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 themselves, and did not withhold the expres- 
 sion of their indignation upon this announce- 
 ment. As Mr. Doll had himself been a 
 guardian of St. Simon IMagus, it was clear 
 to their impartial minds that he was trying 
 by a trick to foist a bastard — perhaps his 
 own — on the wrong parish. 
 
 ]\Ir. Cheekey, a licensed victualler, moved 
 that the master's report be put under the 
 table. 
 
 Mr. Slinkum, draper, seconded the motion. 
 
 !Mr. Edge, ironmonger, pointed out that 
 there was no parliamentary precedent for 
 such a disposition of the report, and, further, 
 that such action did not dispose of the baby. 
 
 "Well," said Mr. Cheekey, turning pain- 
 fully red, " no matter how ye put it. I move 
 to get rid of the brat. What's the best form 
 of motion ?"
 
 A BOARD OF GUARDIANS. I37 
 
 A churchwarden, who happened to be a 
 gentleman, explained that the Board could 
 not dismiss the question in so summary a 
 way. **He could foresee that there might 
 be a nice point of law in the case. They 
 would have to take some legal means of 
 ascertaining their liabilities, and of forcing 
 the other parish to take the child if they ought 
 to do so. They must consult their solicitor." 
 
 This gentleman was sent for post haste. 
 Meanwhile the baby was ordered to be 
 brought in for inspection. The matron had 
 handed him over to a sort of half-witted 
 inmate of the house, whose wits, however, 
 were strangely about him at the wrong 
 time, to nurse and amuse him. This person 
 brought Ginx's Baby into the Board-room, 
 and placed him on the table. The Board 
 of Guardians took a good look at him. lie
 
 138 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 was not then in fair condition. He was 
 limp, he was dirty, hollow in the cheeks, 
 white, stiif in his limbs, and half-naked — 
 (to be regardless of gender) — 
 
 " Pallidula, rigida, nudula." 
 
 " Hum ! " said j\Ir. Stink, who was a dog- 
 breeder — " WHiat's his pedigree ?" 
 
 This brutal joke was well received by some 
 of the Guardians. 
 
 " His pedigree," answered the half-wit, 
 gravely, " goes back for three hundred years. 
 Paricnts unknown by name, but got by Misery 
 out o' Starvashun. The line began with 
 Poverty out o' Laziness in Queen Elizabeth's 
 time. The breed has been a large 'un wotever 
 you thinks of the quality." 
 
 This pleasantry was less acceptable to the 
 Board.
 
 A BOARD OF GUARDIANS. I39 
 
 «' 
 
 Well," said Mr. Scoop, grocer, a great 
 stickler for parliamentary modes of procedure, 
 " I move it be committed," 
 
 " Committed ! Where ?" said Mr. Stink. 
 
 "To Newgate I s'pose," said the half-wit, 
 his eyes twinkling. 
 
 "Nonsense, sir, — for consideration. Send 
 that man out," exclaimed Scoop — "clear the 
 room for consultation." 
 
 Davus was expelled, and the baby w^as then 
 formally consigned to the care of a committee. 
 By this time the legal adviser came in. The 
 facts having been stated to him, he said : 
 
 " Gentlemen, as at present advised I am of 
 opinion that the parish in which the child 
 was found is bound to maintain him. If ]\Ir. 
 Doll (a highly respectable person, my own 
 cheesemonger) found the child beyond the 
 boundaries of St. Simon Magus — and he will
 
 14° GINXS BABY. 
 
 of course swear that he did — you cannot 
 refuse to take it in. However, I had better 
 ascertain the facts from Mr. Doll and take the 
 opinion of counsel. Meanwhile we must 
 beware not to compromise ourselves by ad- 
 mitting anything, or doing anything equiva- 
 lent to an admission. Let me see — Ah ! — yes 
 ■ — a notice to be served on the other parish 
 repudiating the infant ; another notice to Mr. 
 Doll to take it away, and that it remains here 
 at his risk and expense— you see, gentlemen, 
 we could hardly venture to return it to Mr. 
 Doll; we should create an unhappy impres- 
 sion in the minds of the public — " 
 "D— n the public! " said Mr. Stink. 
 " Quite so, my dear sir," said Mr. Phillpotts, 
 smiling, " quite so, but that is not a legal or 
 in fact practicable mode of discarding them; 
 we must act with public opinion, I fear.
 
 A BOARD OF GUARDIANS. 141 
 
 Then, to resume, thirdly and to be strictly 
 safe, we must serve a notice on the infant and 
 all whom it may concern. I think I'll draft 
 it at once." 
 
 In a few minutes the committee in charge 
 pinned to the only garment of Ginx's Baby 
 a paper in the following form : — 
 
 Parish of St. Bartimeus. 
 
 To {jianie unknown), a Foundling, and 
 
 all other perso7is interested in the said Foundling. 
 TAKE NOTICE 
 That you, or either of you, have no just or lawful 
 claim to have you or the said infant chargeable on the 
 said Parish. And this is to notify that you, the 
 said infant, are retained in the workhouse of the said 
 Parish tender protest, and that whatsoever is or may 
 be done or provided for you is at the proper charge 
 of you, and all such perso?is as are and were by law 
 bound to maintain and keep the same. 
 
 Winkle & Phillpotts, 
 
 Solicitors for the Board. 

 
 142 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 III.—" The World is my Parish," 
 
 When ]\Ir. Phillpotts called upon Doll, the 
 cheesemonger, the latter straightway gave 
 him the facts as they had occurred. He 
 pointed out the exact spot on which the 
 bundle had lain ; he gave an estimate of the 
 number of inches on each side of the line 
 occupied by it, and declared that the head 
 and shoulders of the infant lay in the parish 
 of the solicitor's clients. Ginx's Baby, under 
 the title ^^ Re a Foundling," was once more 
 submitted for the opinion of counsel. They 
 advised the Board that as the child was in both 
 parishes when found, but had been taken up 
 by a ratepayer of St, Simon Magus, the latter 
 parish was bound to support him. Where- 
 upon the Guardians of St. Bartimeus at 
 their next meeting resolved that the Vestry
 
 THE WORLD IS MY PARISH. 143 
 
 of the other parish should have a written 
 notice to remove the child, failing which ap- 
 plication should be made to the Queen's Bench 
 for a mandamus to compel them to do it. 
 
 On receiving the challenge the Guardians 
 of St. Simon Magus also took counsel's 
 opinion. They were advised that as the 
 greater part, and especially the head of the 
 infant, was when discovered in the parish of 
 St. Bartimeus, the latter was clearly charge- 
 able. Both parties then proceeded to swear 
 affidavits. The Attorney-General and Soli- 
 citor-General, the two great law-officers of the 
 crown, were retained on opposite sides, and 
 took fees — not for an Imperial prosecution, 
 but as petty Queen's Counsel in an inter- 
 parochial squabble. 
 
 * *
 
 144 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 TV. — "Without prejudice to any one but the Guardians. 
 
 The Court of Queen's Bench, after hearing 
 an elaborate statement from the Attorney- 
 General, granted a rule fiz'si for a mandamus. 
 This rule was entered for argument in a 
 paper called "The Special Paper," and, the 
 list being a heavy one, nearly a year elapsed 
 before it was reached. It was then again 
 postponed several times " for the convenience 
 of counsel." 
 
 The Board of St. Bartimeus chafed under 
 the law's delay. They became morbidly 
 sensitive to the incubus of Ginx's Baby, espe- 
 cially as the press had been reviewing some 
 of their recent acts with great bitterness. 
 The Guardians were defiant. Having served 
 their notices, they were induced by Mr. Stink 
 to resolve not to maintain the infant. The
 
 WITHOUT PREJUDICE. 1415 
 
 poor child was threatened with dissolution. 
 Thus, no doubt, many difficulties in paro- 
 chial administration are solved — the subject 
 vanishes away. The baby was kept pro- 
 visionally in a room at the workhouse. On 
 the outside of the door was a notice in fair 
 round-hand: — 
 
 NOTICE. 
 doll's foundling. 
 
 Fend'mg the legal enquiry hito the facts concerning 
 the above infant, and a decision as to its settlement, 
 all officials, assistants, and servants of the workhouse 
 are forbidden to enter the room in which it is depo- 
 sited, or to render it any service or assistance, on pain 
 of dismissal No food is to be supplied to it from the 
 workhouse kitchen. 
 
 N.B. This is not intetided to prevent persons other 
 
 than officials, &=c.,from having access to the i7ifant, 
 
 or assistijig it. 
 
 By Order of the Board.
 
 146 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 That any body of human beings, other than 
 Patagonians, could have coolly contemplated 
 such a result as must have followed upon 
 the strict performance of this order, would 
 be incredible except in the instance of the 
 Guardians of St. Bartimeus. There was no- 
 thing they could not do — or leave undone. 
 Fortunately for Ginx's Bab}'-, the order was 
 disobeyed. Occasionally lady visitors went 
 to look at him and give him some food — he 
 was toddling about the room on unsteady 
 legs — but charity seemed to be appalled by 
 the official questions hanging about this 
 child. The master, Snigger, whose busi- 
 ness it was every day to ascertain whether 
 the cause of the great parochial quarrel was 
 in, or out of, existence, became a traitor to 
 the Board. When the child grew hungry and 
 dangerously thin, he brought bottles of pap
 
 WITHOUT PREJUDICE. 147 
 
 prepared by IMrs. Snigger, and administered 
 it to him. No conclusions to the disfavour 
 of the Board were to be drawn from this 
 conduct, for Snigger was particular to say 
 to the boy in a loud voice, each time he fed 
 him : 
 
 " Now, youngster, this is without prejudice, 
 remember ! I give you due notice — without 
 prejudice." 
 
 Who, in ]\Iaster Ginx's situation, would 
 have had any prejudices to such action, or 
 have expressed them even if they were enter- 
 tained ? He took no objection as he took 
 the pap ; while Snigger was glad to be able 
 to do an unusual kindness without compro- 
 mising the parish. 
 
 Thus things had gone on for many months, 
 when one day an eye of that Argus monster, 
 the Public, was set upon Ginx's Baby. A well-
 
 148 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 known nobleman, calling at the workhouse 
 to see a little girl whom he had saved from 
 infamy, as he passed down a corridor was 
 arrested by the notice on the door of our 
 hero's room. Curiosity took him in, and 
 horror chained him there for some time. 
 Had he not entered, Ginx's Baby, spite of 
 Snigger, would in twenty-four hours have 
 ceased to supply facts to history. He was 
 suffering from low fever, and his condition 
 was as sensationally shocking as any re- 
 porter could have wished. Out rushed the 
 peer for a doctor, took a cab to a magistrate 
 and detailed the whole case, to be repeated 
 in next morning's papers. Penny-a-liners 
 ran to the spot, wrote vivid descrip- 
 tions of the baby and the room, and tran- 
 scribed the notice. The Guardians were 
 drubbed in trenchant leaders and indignant
 
 WITHOUT PREJUDICE. I49 
 
 letters. They, instead of bending to the 
 storm, strove to confront it, and passed angry 
 resolutions of a childish and grotesque cha- 
 racter. The few of them who possessed any 
 sense of propriety were railed at in the meet- 
 ings till they ceased to attend. The uproar 
 outside increased. Why did not the Presi- 
 dent of the Poor-Law Board interfere ? At 
 last he did interfere : that is, instead of visit- 
 ing the scene himself, and satisfying his own 
 eyes as to the truth of what his ears had 
 heard, a process that would have taken a 
 couple of hours, he appointed a gentleman 
 to hold an enquiry. The Guardians became 
 furious. The reports of their proceedings 
 read like the vagaries of a lunatic asylum 
 or the deliberations of the American Senate. 
 They discharged Snigger for breach of orders, 
 substituting a relative of Mr. Stink. They
 
 150 GINXS BABY, 
 
 put a lock on the door, and passed food 
 to the Baby by a stick. A committee was 
 appointed to see him fed, and they forwarded 
 a memorial to the Poor-Law Board, stating 
 that " he daily had more food than he could 
 possibly eat, and was in admirable condi- 
 tion." They refused to allow any doctor but 
 one employed by themselves to see him. 
 They procured from him a certificate that the 
 noble busybody and his physician had made 
 a mistake, and that all the functions of life in 
 the infant appeared to be in perfect order. 
 Then came the gentleman, and the enquiry, 
 and his report, and a letter from the Poor- 
 Law Board, and further discussions and more 
 letters, until the bewildered public gnashed 
 its teeth at the Minister, the Guardians, and 
 the law, and wished them all at Land's End 
 or beyond it.
 
 AN UNGODLY JUNGLE. 151 
 
 V. — An Ungodly Jungle. 
 
 The case of the Guardians of St. Bartimcus 
 against the Guardians of St. Simon Magus 
 was at length reached. The argument lasted 
 for two days. There is a grim work, the 
 short title whereof is "Burns's Justice," in 
 five fat volumes, from which the legal Dry- 
 asdust turns aghast. In one of these por- 
 tentous books, title "Poor," pp. 1200, the in- 
 quisitive may find a code unrivalled by the 
 most malignant ingenuity of former or con- 
 temporary nations : a code wherein, by 
 gradual accretion, has been framed a system 
 of relief to poverty and distress so impolitic, 
 so unprincipled, that none but the driest, 
 mustiest, most petrified parish official could 
 be expected to lift up his voice to defend it ; 
 so complicated that no man under heaven
 
 152 GINXS BABY. 
 
 knows its length or breadth or height or 
 depth ; yet it stands to this hour a monu- 
 ment of English stolidity — a mar\'el of lazy 
 or ignorant statesmanship. Imagine, if 
 you please, a Lord Chief Justice and three 
 Puisnes, all keen, practical men, alive to 
 public policy and the common weal, eager 
 to extricate the truth and do the right, plung- 
 ing into this " ungodly jungle," thwarted at 
 every turn, in search of justice for Ginx's 
 Baby. With all his patient industry and light- 
 ning quickness of apprehension, the Chief 
 Justice found it hard to reconcile past and 
 present, or evolve from the vast confusion 
 anything consistent with his moral instincts. 
 
 — Clear the board, gentlemen. True regene- 
 rative legislation will begin by drawing away 
 the rubbish. Reform means more than re-
 
 AN UNGODLY JUNGLE. 153 
 
 pair. Mend, patch, take down a little here, 
 prop up some tottering nuisance there, fill 
 in gaping chinks with patent legislative 
 cement, coat old fagades with bright paint, 
 hide decay beneath a gloze of novelty, titi- 
 vate, decorate, furbish— and after all your 
 house is not a new one, but a whited 
 sepulchre shaking to decay. Repair ? There 
 is a Repair party, intermediating between 
 Tories and Reformers — Radicals or Rooters 
 let us call these latter if you like — who cling 
 to "vested interests" and all other sorts of 
 antique nuisances, yet say they are willing 
 to improve them. Reform, which means. 
 Pull down with bold statesman's hand, and 
 with like hand Rebuild, is no darling of 
 your political Repairer. Call the party and 
 the men by their right names : and give me 
 for utility in legislation or administrative
 
 154 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 action an Old Tory and Obstructive party 
 rather than this middling, meddling, mud- 
 dling Repairer — 
 
 " Eager to change yet fearful to destroy." 
 
 Just now all Social Reformation, in its 
 noblest aims and attempts, is fettered by 
 the Repair party. What is termed Sanitary 
 Reform is enfeebled, and the vigour with- 
 drawn from it, by this party. "Vested 
 rights," " the Liberty of the people," " Inter- 
 ference with personal freedom," " Expense," 
 — these are the watchwords of the Repairer 
 in opposition to him who, pointing to the 
 pallor and fever of a hundred neighbour- 
 hoods, calls upon a ministry to cleanse them 
 with imperial force. 
 
 A comprehensive scheme of National Educa- 
 tion is seized and half-throttled by the Repair
 
 AN UNGODLY JUNGLE. 155 
 
 party. " Oh ! utilise what there is ; improve 
 on and tack to the denominational system ; 
 avail yourself of the jealousy of sects ; see 
 what a grand building that has already 
 erected ! True, it is not large enough ; true, 
 it is badly built ; but repair that, and add 
 wings. It will cost you ever so much to 
 rebuild — Repair ! " 
 
 The methods of relief to the Poor are old, 
 cumbrous, unequal, as stupid as those who 
 administer them. Forth steps the Reformer, 
 and cries out — "Clear this wrack away ! Get 
 rid of your antiquated Bumbledom, your 
 parochial and non-parochial distinctions, 
 your complicated map of local authorities; 
 re-distribute the kingdom on some more 
 practical system, redress the injustice of 
 unequal rating, improve the machinery and 
 spirit of relief, and so on." You have the
 
 156 G I X X'S B A B Y. 
 
 Repair party shouting its Non posstunus 
 as loudly as any other arch-obstructive : 
 "Heaven forbid! Queen Elizabeth and the 
 Poor Laws for ever! To the rescue of 
 Local Government and Vested Interests ! 
 Repair!" 
 
 Some one with a long head and a divinely- 
 warmed heart, searching vainly for help to 
 thousands in the packed alleys of his English 
 Home, sends his quick glance across seas to 
 rich lands that daily cry to heaven for 
 strong arms that wield the plough and spade. 
 " Ho ! " he shouts, " Labour to Land — starva- 
 tion to production — death unto life ! " and he 
 calls upon every statesman and patriot to 
 help the good work, and give their energies 
 to frame an Emigration Scheme. Then the 
 Repair party foams : " Send away the Labour, 
 the source of our wealth r No. Mend the
 
 AN UNGODLY JUNGLE. 157 
 
 condition of the labourer ; give him the sop 
 of political rights— free breakfasts — the ballot. 
 Give State funds to alter social conditions? 
 No. Improve the methods of local assistance 
 to Emigration; it is a temporary remedy — 
 
 Repair ! " 
 
 Thus, according to the gospel of this party, 
 everything must be subject of restoration only. 
 Like antiquarians, they utter groans over the 
 abolition of anything, however ugly it may 
 be, however unfitted for human uses, and with 
 however so elegant a piece of artistry you de- 
 sire to displace it. For them a Gilbert-Scott 
 politician, reverential restorer of bygone styles, 
 enthusiastic to conserve and amend the gro- 
 tesque Gothic policies of the past, rather than 
 some Brunei or Stephenson statesman, engi- 
 neering in novel mastery of circumstances — not 
 fearful to face and conquer even the antique
 
 158 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 impediments of Nature. Give me a trenchant 
 statesman, or I pray you leave legislation 
 alone. Better things as they are than patched 
 to distraction. , 
 
 At length, by means of some delicate legal 
 
 adjustments, the judges saw their way to 
 
 aihrming that Ginx's Baby's parish was that 
 
 of St. Bartimeus, and refused the rule for a 
 
 mandamus. 
 
 * * 
 
 » 
 
 Vr. — Parochial Benevolence — and another translation. 
 
 The authorities of St. Bartimeus did not take 
 kindly to the charge imposed upon them by 
 the Queen's Bench. Some of the Guardians 
 privately hinted to the master that it was 
 unnecessary to overfeed the infant. They did 
 not burthen him with much clothing, and 
 what be had was shared with many lively
 
 PAROCHIAL BENEVOLENCE. 159 
 
 companions. When you, good matron, look 
 at your little pink-cheeked daughter, so clean 
 and so cosy in her pretty cot, waking to see 
 the well-faced nurse, or you, still sweeter to 
 her eyes, watching above her dreams, perhaps 
 you ought to stop a moment to contrast the 
 scene with the sad tableaux you may get 
 sight of not far away. * * * Ginx's Baby 
 was not an ill-favoured child. He had in- 
 herited his father's frame and strength : these 
 helped him through the changes we are 
 relating. What if these capacities had, by 
 simple nourishing food, cleanly care-taking, 
 and brighter, kindlier associations, been 
 trained into full working order ? Left alone 
 or ill-tended they were daily dwindling, and 
 the depreciation was going on not solely at 
 the expense of little Ginx, but of the whole 
 community. To reduce his strength one-
 
 l6o GINX'S BABY. 
 
 half was to reduce one-half his chances of 
 independence, and to multiply the pro- 
 spects of his continuous application for 
 State aid. 
 
 The money spent in stopping a hole in a 
 Dutch dyke is doubtless better invested than 
 if it were to be retained until a vast breach 
 had laid half a kingdom under water. Surely 
 your Hollander would agree to be mulcted in 
 one-third of his fortune rather than run the 
 hazard ! 
 
 Every day through this wealthy country 
 there are men and women busy marring 
 the little images of God, that are by-and-by 
 to be part of its public — shadowing young 
 spirits, repressing their energy, sapping their 
 vigour or failing to make it up, corrupting 
 their nature by foul associations, moral and 
 physical. Some are doing it by special
 
 PAROCHIAL BENEVOLENCE. l6l 
 
 license of the devil, others by Act of Parlia- 
 ment, others by negligence or niggardliness. 
 Could you teach or force these people — many 
 unconsciously engaged in the vile work — to 
 run together, as men alarmed by sudden 
 danger, and throw around a helpless genera- 
 tion influences and a care more akin to your 
 own home ideal, would you not transfigure 
 the next epoch — would not your labour and 
 sacrifice be a GoD-WORK, reaching out 
 weighty, fruit-laden branches far into the 
 grateful future ? 'Tis by feeling and enjoining 
 everywhere the need of such a movement as 
 this that you, O all-powerful woman ! can 
 carry your will into the play of a great 
 economic and social reform. Society that 
 recognises not a root-truth like that is sowing- 
 the wind — God knows what it will reap. 
 So the Guardians, keeping carefully within 
 
 M
 
 l62 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 the law, neglected nothing that could sap 
 little Ginx's vitality, deaden his happiest 
 instincts, derange moral action, cause hope 
 to die within his infant breast almost as soon 
 as it were born. Good God ! 
 
 The items the Board were really entitled to 
 charge the rate-payers as supplied to our hero 
 were — 
 
 Dirt, 
 
 Fleas, 
 
 Foul air, 
 
 Chances of catching skin diseases, 
 fevers, &:c.. 
 
 Vile company. 
 
 Neglect, 
 
 Occasional cruelty, and 
 
 A small supply of bad food and 
 clothing. 
 Every pauper was to them an obnoxious
 
 PAROCHIAL BENEVOLENCE. t6j 
 
 charge by any and every means to be reduced 
 to a mtnimuin or nil. Ginx's Baby was re- 
 duced to a minimum. His constitution 
 enabled him to protest against reduction to 
 nil. But, just after the bills of costs had been 
 taxed, mulcting the rate-payers of St. Bar- 
 timeus in a sum of more than ;^i,6oo, the 
 Guardians were made aware of the name and 
 origin of their charge. One of the persons 
 who had deserted him was arrested for theft, 
 and among other articles in her possession 
 were some of the Baby's clothes. She con- 
 fessed the whole story, and declared that the 
 child left in Nether Place was no other than the 
 Protestant Baby, son of Ginx, about whom so 
 much stir had been made two years before. 
 The Guardians were not long in tracing Ginx, 
 and, at his quarters in Rosemary Street, the 
 hapless changeling was one day delivered by
 
 164 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 a deputy relieving-officer, with the benedic- 
 tion, by me sadly recorded — 
 
 " There he is, d — n him ! " 
 
 I am sure if the Guardians had been there 
 they would have said : 
 
 " Amen."
 
 PART IV. 
 
 WHAT THE CLUBS AND POLITICIANS DID 
 WITH HIM. 
 
 I. — Moved on. 
 
 /^^INX'S BABY'S brothers and sisters 
 would have nothing to say to him. Mrs. 
 Ginx declared she could see in him no likeness 
 to her own dear lost one ; and her husband 
 swore that the brat never was his. The couple 
 had latterly been pinching themselves and 
 their children to save enough to emigrate. 
 For this purpose aid and counsel were given to 
 them by a neighbouring curate, whose name, 
 were my pages destined to immortality, 
 should be printed here in golden letters. 
 Rich and full will be his sheaves when many
 
 l66 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 a statesman reaps tares. Finding that a 
 thirteenth child was imposed on them by so 
 superior a force as the law of England the 
 Ginxes hastened their departure. 
 
 Their last night in London, towards the 
 small hours, Ginx, carrying our hero, went 
 along Birdcage Walk. He scarcely knew 
 where he was going, or how he was about 
 to dispose of his burden, but he meant to 
 get rid of it. On he went, here and there 
 met by shadowy creatures who came to- 
 wards his footsteps in the uncertain dark- 
 ness, and when they could see that he was 
 no quarry for them flitted away again into 
 the night. 
 
 He passed the dingy houses, since replaced 
 by the Foreign Office, across the open space 
 before the Horse Guards, near the house of a 
 popular Prime Minister, and up the broad
 
 MOVED ON. 167 
 
 steps till he stood under the York Column. 
 The shadow of this was an inviting- place, but 
 a policeman turning- his lantern suspiciously 
 on the man walking- about at that silent hour 
 wdth a child in his arms frustrated his wish. 
 Slowly Ginx tramped along Pall Mall, with 
 only one other creature stirring, as it seemed 
 for the moment — a gentleman who turned up 
 the steps of a large building. Seating the 
 child on the bottom step and telling him not 
 to cry, Ginx instantly crossed the road, turned 
 into St. James's Square, passed by the rails, 
 and stealing from corner to corner through 
 the mazes of that locality, reached home by 
 way of Piccadilly and Grosvenor Place. 
 Henceforth this history shall know him no 
 more. 
 
 » * 
 *
 
 l68 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 II. — Club Ideas. 
 
 Scarcely had the shadow of his parent 
 vanished in the gloom before Ginx's Baby- 
 piped forth a lusty protest : the street rang 
 again. Ere long the doors at the top of the 
 steps swung back, and a portly form stood in 
 the light. 
 
 " Halloo ! what's the matter ?" (This was a 
 general observation into space.) " Why, bless 
 my heart, here's a child crying on the steps ! " 
 
 Another form appeared. 
 
 "Is there nobody wich it ? Halloo! any one 
 there?" 
 
 No answer came save from poor little Ginx, 
 but his was decided. The two servants de- 
 scended the steps and looked at the miserable 
 boy without touching him. Then they peered 
 into the darkness in hope that they might get
 
 CLUB IDEAS. 169 
 
 a glimpse of his mother or a policeman. A 
 rapid step sounded on the pavement and a 
 gentleman came up to the group. 
 
 "What have we here ?" he said gently. 
 
 " It's a child. Sir Charles, I found crying on 
 the steps. I expect it's a trick to get rid of 
 him. We are looking for a policeman to take 
 him away." 
 
 "Poor little fellow," said Sir Charles, 
 stooping to take a fair look at Ginx's Baby, 
 " for you and such as you the policeman or 
 the parish officers are the national guardians, 
 and the prison or the poor-house the home. 
 .... Bring him into the Club, Smirke." 
 
 The men hesitated a moment before exe- 
 cuting so unwonted a demand, but Sir Charles 
 Sterling was a man not safely to be thwarted 
 — a late minister and a member of the com- 
 mittee. The child being carried into the
 
 lyo GINX'S BABY. 
 
 magnificent hall of the Club, stood on it^; 
 mosaic floor. From above the radiance of the 
 gas "sunlight" streamed down over the marble 
 pillars, and glanced on gilded cornices and 
 panels of scagliola. A statue of the Queen 
 looked upon him from the niche that opened 
 to the dining-room ; another of the great 
 Puritan soldier, statesman, and ruler, with his 
 stern massive front ; and yet another, with 
 the strong yet gentle features of the champion 
 Free-Trader, seemed to regard him from their 
 several corners. On the walls around were 
 portraits of men who had striven for the 
 deliverance of the people from ancient yokes 
 and fetters. Of course Ginx's Baby did not 
 see all this. He, poor boy, dazed, stood with 
 a knuckle in his eye, while the porter, 
 lacqueys, Sir Charles Sterling, and others 
 who strolled out of the reading-room, curiously
 
 CLUB IDEAS. 171 
 
 regarded him. But any one observing the 
 scene apart might have contrasted the place 
 with the child — the principles and the profes- 
 sions whereof this grandeur was the monument 
 and consecrated tabernacle, with this solitary 
 atomic specimen of the material whereon 
 they were to work. What social utility had 
 resulted from the great mov^ements initiated 
 by them who erected and frequented this 
 place ? Ought they to have had, and did they 
 still need a complement? "While wonderful 
 political changes had been wrought, and 
 benefits not to be exaggerated won for many 
 classes, What had been done for Ginx's 
 Baby ? 
 
 The query would not have been very ridi- 
 culous. He was an unit of the British Empire 
 — nothing could blot out that fact before 
 heaven ! Had anything been left undone that
 
 172 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 ought to have been done, or done that had 
 well been left undone, or were better to be 
 undone now ? Of a truth that was worth a 
 thought. 
 
 "What's all this?" said a big Member of 
 Parliament, a minister renowned for economy 
 in matters financial and intellectual. "What 
 are you doing with this youngster ? I never 
 saw such an irregularity in a Club in my 
 life." 
 
 " If you saw it oftener you would think 
 more about it," said Sir Charles Sterling. 
 " We found him on the steps. I think he was 
 asking for you, Glibton." 
 
 This sally turned a laugh against the 
 minister. 
 
 "Well," said another, "he has come to the 
 wrong quarter if he wants money." 
 
 "I shouldn't wonder," said a third, "if he
 
 CLUB IDEAS. 173 
 
 were one of the new messengers at the Office 
 of Popular Edifices. Glibton is reducing their 
 staff." 
 
 " If that's the case I think you have reached 
 the minimum here, Glibton," cried Sir Charles. 
 " Can't the country afford a livery ?" 
 
 "Bother you all," replied the Secretary, 
 who was secretly pleased to be quizzed for his 
 peculiarities — "tell us what this means. 
 Whose Mark' is it?" 
 
 "No lark at all," said Sterling. "Here is 
 a problem for you and all of us to solve. 
 This forlorn object is representative, and 
 stands here to-night preaching us a serious 
 sermon. He was deserted on the Club steps 
 — left there, perhaps, as a piece of clever 
 irony; he might be son to some of us. 
 What's your name, my boy ?" 
 
 Ginx's Baby managed to say "Dunno!"
 
 174 GINXS BABY. 
 
 "Ask him if he has any name?" said an 
 Irish ex-member, with a grave face. 
 
 Ginx's Baby to this question responded 
 distinctly "No." 
 
 "No name," said the humourist; " then the 
 author of his being must be Wilkie Collins." 
 
 Everybody laughed at this indifferent plea- 
 santry but our hero. His bosom began to 
 heave ominously. 
 
 " What's to be done with him :" 
 
 " Send him to the workhouse." 
 
 " Send him to the d " {there ma}' be 
 
 brutality among the gods and goddesses}. 
 
 " Give him to the porter." 
 
 " No thank you sir," said he, promptly. 
 
 The gentlemen were turning away, when 
 Sir Charles stopped them. 
 
 "Look here!" he said, taking the boy's 
 .-.rm and baring it, " this boy can hardly be
 
 CLUB IDEAS. 175 
 
 called a human being. See what a thin arm 
 he has — how flaccid and colourless the flesh 
 seems — what an old face ! — and I can scarcely 
 feel any pulse. Good heavens, get him some 
 wine ! A few hours will send him to the 
 
 d sure enough What are we to do 
 
 for him, Glibton ? I say again, he is only part 
 of a great problem. There must be hundreds 
 of thousands growing up like this child ; and 
 what a generation to contemplate in all its 
 relations and effects ! " 
 
 The gentlemen were dashed by his earnest- 
 ness. 
 
 *' Oh, you're exaggerating," said Glibton ; 
 *< there can't be such widespread misery. 
 Why, if there were, the people would be 
 wrecking our houses." 
 
 " Ah ! " replied the other, sadly, " will you 
 wait to be convinced by that sort of thing
 
 176 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 before you believe in their misery ? I assure 
 you what I say is true. I could bring you a 
 hundred clergymen to testify to it to-morrow 
 morning." 
 
 " God forbid ! " said Glibton. " Good-night." 
 The right honourable gentleman extin- 
 guished the subject in his own little brain 
 with his big hat ; but everywhere else the 
 sparks are still aglow, and he, with all like 
 him, may wake up suddenly, as frightened 
 women in the night, to find themselves 
 environed in the red glare of a popular con- 
 flagration. Well for them then if they are 
 not in charge of the State machinery. AVhat 
 an hour will that be for hurrying to and fro 
 with water-pipes and buckets, when proper 
 forethought, diligence, and sacrifice would 
 have made the building fireproof.
 
 A THOROUGH-PACED REFORMER. 177 
 
 III. — A thorough-paced Reformer — if not a Revolutionary. 
 
 By the kindness and influence of Sir Charles 
 Sterling, Ginx's Baby that night, and long 
 after, found shelter in the Radical Club. He 
 gave rise to a discussion in the smoking-room 
 next evening that ought to be chronicled. 
 Several members of the committee supported 
 his benefactor in urging that the child should 
 be adopted by the Club, as a pledge of their 
 resolve to make the questions of which he 
 seemed to bo the embodied emblem subjects 
 of legislative action. Others said that those 
 questions being, in their view, social and not 
 political, were not proper ones to give impulse 
 to a party movement, and that the entertain- 
 ment in the Club of this foundling would 
 be a gross irregularity : they did not want 
 samples of the material respecting which they 
 
 N
 
 lyS GINX'S BADY. 
 
 were theorising. To some of the latter Sir 
 Charles had been insisting that, whether they 
 kept the child or not, they could not stifle the 
 questions excited by his condition. 
 
 " You may delay, but you cannot dissipate 
 them. We are filling up our sessions with 
 party struggles, theoretic discussions, squab- 
 bles about foreign politics, debates on poli- 
 tical machinery, while year by year the 
 condition of the people is becoming more 
 invidious and full of peril. Social and poli- 
 tical reform ought to be linked ; the people on 
 whom )'ou confer new political rights cannot 
 enjoy them without health and well-being." 
 
 " But all our legislation is directed to 
 that!" exclaimed j\Ir. Joshua Hale. "Re- 
 form, Free Trade, Free Corn — have these not 
 enhanced the wealth of the people ?" 
 
 " Partially ; yet there are classes unregene-
 
 A THOROUGH-PACED REFORMER. 179 
 
 rated by their reviving influences. Free trade 
 cannot ensure work, nor can free corn provide 
 food for every citizen." 
 
 " Nor any other legislation : let us be prac- 
 tical. I own there is much to be done. I 
 have often stated my 'platform.' We must 
 clip the enormous expenditure on soldiers 
 and ships ; reduce our overweening army of 
 diplomatic spies and busybodies ; abstain 
 from meddling in everybody's quarrels ; re- 
 deem from taxation the workman's neces- 
 saries — a free breakfast-table ; peremptorily 
 legislate against the custom of primogeniture ; 
 encourage the distribution and transfer of 
 land ; and, under the aegis of the ballot, pro- 
 tect from the tyranny of the landlord and 
 employer their tenants and workmen." 
 
 " Very good, perhaps, all of them," replied 
 Sir Charles, "but some not at the moment
 
 l8o GINX'S BABY. 
 
 possible, and all together are not exhaustive. 
 Why do you not go to the bottom of social 
 needs ? You say nothing about Health legis- 
 lation—are you indifferent to the sanitary 
 condition of the people ? You have not hinted 
 at Education— AVaste Lands— Emigration— " 
 " Oh ! I am opposed to that altogether." 
 "I forgot, you are a manufacturer; yet 
 the last man of whom I should believe that 
 selfishness had warped the judgment. You 
 have done and endured more than any living 
 statesman for the advantage of your fellow- 
 citizens, so that I will not cast at you the 
 aspersion of class-blindness. Still, I can 
 scarcely think you have looked at this matter 
 in the pure light of patriotism, and not within 
 the narrow scope of trade interests." 
 
 " Quite unjust. Our best economists repre- 
 hend the policy of depleting our labour-
 
 A THOROUGH-PACED RKFORINIER. iSl 
 
 market. Emigration is a timely remedy for 
 adversity and to be very sparingly used. 
 Labour is our richest vein — " 
 
 " We may have too much of it. Take it as 
 a fact that you now have more than you can 
 use, and the unemployed part is starving ; 
 what will you do with them ?" 
 
 "That is a mere temporary and casual 
 depression, to which all classes are liable." 
 
 " But," said Sir Charles, " which none can 
 so ill bear. Nay — what if it is permanent ? 
 You look to increased trade. Do you sup- 
 pose we are to retain our manufacturing 
 pre-eminence when every country, new and 
 old, is competing with us ? Can our trade, 
 I ask you honestly to consider, increase at 
 the rate of our population ? Besides, for 
 heaven's sake, look at the thing as a man. 
 Grant that we have a hundred thousand men
 
 lS2 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 out of work, and hundreds of thousands more 
 dependent on them — do you think it no small 
 thing that the vast mass should be left for 
 one, two, three years seething in sorrow and 
 distress, while they are waiting for trade! 
 By the time that comes they may have gone 
 beyond the hope of rescue. Ah ! if an elastic 
 trade comes back to-morrow, you can never 
 make those people what they were ; ought 
 we not to have forecast that they should not 
 be what they are ? But I contend that de- 
 pression has become chronic, the poverty 
 more wide-spread and persistent— how then 
 shall we, who represent these classes among 
 the rest, face the prospect?" 
 
 Here interposed a gentleman high in office, 
 a pure, keen, rigid economist of the highest 
 intellectual and political rank. 
 
 " My dear Sterling, pardon me if I say you
 
 A THOROUGII-rACED REFORMER. I S3 
 
 are talking wildly Perhaps you don't see 
 that you are verging on rank communism. 
 The working of economic laws can be as 
 infallibly projected as a solar eclipse. You 
 can secure no class from periodic calamity, 
 and so regulate laws of supply and demand 
 by guiding- wheels of legislation and taxation 
 as to save every man from penury. You wish 
 us to send away our bone and sinew because 
 we have no present employment for it, and 
 next year, or the year after, under a re- 
 covered trade you will be wringing your hands 
 and cursing the folly that prompted you to 
 do it." 
 
 " I should be too glad of the opportunity," 
 replied Sir Charles, sturdily, "but in truth 
 there is an incubus of excessive numbers that 
 no revival of trade will provide for, even if it 
 is beyond our extremest hopes, and I for one
 
 184 GINX'S BABY, 
 
 will not be guilty of the inhumanity of keep- 
 ing fellow-creatures in misery till we can find 
 a use for them. You have forgotten that 
 there are other economic laws besides those 
 you glance at. Several millions of acres of 
 unoccupied land belonging in a sense to the 
 people of this country are to be kept untilled 
 in defiance of the plainest policy that nature 
 and God have indicated to us, namely, that 
 labour should come in contact with land ! 
 For want of this conjunction our colonies 
 are to be checked, while at home miserable 
 millions are gaping for work and food." 
 
 " Oh ! let them take themselves out. There 
 are too many going already. They will 
 follow natural laws, and where labour is 
 required thither the stream will flow." 
 
 "Mere surface talk, my clever friend." 
 replied the olher, *' the men who are troop-
 
 A THOROUGH-PACED REFORMER. 185 
 
 ing- out at their own expense are our most 
 sober, careful, and energetic workmen. Else 
 they could not go. They go because here 
 so many indifferent ones are weighing down 
 their shoulders. And where do most of them 
 go to ? Not to strengthen and develop our 
 colonies, but the United States — a not always 
 friendly people, and just now your free- 
 trader's bugbear ! " 
 
 "Well, w^ell," said the minister, "drop that 
 question. It's utterly impracticable at this 
 time. We couldn't entertain the demand for 
 State-help for an instant. I tell you again 
 you're a Fourierite. You virtually propose \ 
 to put your hand in the pocket of the upper 
 classes to pay all sorts of expenses for the 
 lower." 
 
 "You may call me a communist if you 
 please," replied Sir Charles Sterling; "I do
 
 lS6 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 not shrink from shadows. Perhaps I am in 
 favour of something nearer to communism 
 than our present form of society. One thing- 
 I am clear about : no state of society is 
 healthy wherein every man does not own 
 himself to be the guardian of the interests of 
 the community as well as his own — does not 
 see that he is bound, morally and as a matter 
 of public policy, to add to his neighbour's 
 well-being as well as his own. Does not so- 
 ciety, by its protection and aggregation, make 
 it possible for the rich to grow rich, the 
 genius and the ambitious man to pursue their 
 aims, the merchant to gather his vails, the 
 noble to enjoy his lands ? For these i)ri\ilcg<>s 
 there is more or less to pay, and it may be 
 that the proper proportion which the capable 
 classes should be called upon to contribute to 
 the common weal has never been correctly
 
 A THOROUGH-PACED REFORMER. 187 
 
 adjusted. The first fruit of practical Chris- 
 tianity was community of goods, and but for 
 human selfishness we might hope for an 
 Eutopian era— when, while it should be ruled 
 that if a man would not work neither should 
 he eat, there should also be brought home to 
 every man the care of his poorer, or weaker, 
 or less competent brother. I never expect to 
 see that. I do hope to see the men of greatest 
 ability pay more generously for the privileges 
 they enjoy. The best policy for them too. 
 The better the condition of the general com- 
 munity the better for themselves. You cannot 
 alarm me with epithets. But these views are 
 happily not essential to the support of the 
 Emigration policy." 
 
 " O dear ! O dear ! mad as a March hare !" 
 cried the minister, as he stumped from the 
 room.
 
 l88 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 "Sterling is a good fellow," said he to a 
 colleague with whom he walked down Pall 
 Mall, "and a thorough-paced Liberal. Be- 
 sides, he carries great weight in the House. 
 But he is an enthusiast, and, therefore, not 
 always quite practical." 
 
 By practical the minister meant, not that 
 which might well and to advantage be done if 
 good and able men would resolve to do it, 
 spite of all hindrances, but that which, upon 
 a cunning review of party balances and a 
 judicious probing of public opinion, seemed 
 to be a policy fit for his party to pursue. 
 The first, original and masterly statesmen 
 are needed to initiate and perform — the other 
 is simply the art of a genius who knows how 
 most adroitly to manipulate people and cir- 
 cumstances. 

 
 VERY BROAD VIEWS. 1S9 
 
 rV. — Very Broad Views. 
 
 Sir Charles Sterling, Mr. Joshua Hale, 
 and others continued the conversation inter- 
 rupted by the minister's exit. What was to 
 be done with Ginx's Baby ? In the great 
 dissected map of society what niches were cut 
 out for him and all like him to fill ? Most of 
 the politicians were for leaving that to him- 
 self to find out. The term " law of supply and 
 demand" was freely bandied between them, 
 as it is in many journals nowadays, with little 
 object save to shut up avenues of discussion 
 by a high-sounding phrase. 
 
 Then of these " statesmen," most clung, if 
 not to self-interest, to personal crotchets. 
 What is more darling to a man than the child 
 of his intellect or fancy ? How the poor 
 poetaster hugs his tawdry verses as if they
 
 iqo GINXS BABY. 
 
 were the imperial ornaments of genius ! Just 
 in the same way does the politician love the 
 policies himself hath devised, pressing them 
 forward at all hazards, while he is blind to the 
 utility of others. This is the basis of that 
 aspect of selfishness which often mars in the 
 approbation of a country a really honest 
 statesmanship — an egotistic tenacity of one's 
 own creature as the best, which yet is not 
 the criminal selfishness of ambition. Still 
 that egotism is not seldom disastrous to the 
 people's interests. While these statesmen 
 nursed their own bantlings and held them up 
 to national notice, they were apt to avoid or 
 too lightly regard the views of men as able 
 as themselves. For instance, Joshua Hale — 
 who is far above these remarks generally — 
 had put forth a scheme for the solution of the 
 St. Helena property question — very likely a
 
 VERY BROAD VIEWS. I9I 
 
 good one, albeit revolutionary, and nothing 
 w^ould convince him that any other could 
 succeed. He wished every man in St. Helena 
 — a turbulent adjunct of the British Empire — 
 to be a landowner, and I do think, neither 
 desired nor hoped that any man in that island 
 should be happy until he was one. Yet there 
 were other men ready to offer simpler reme- 
 dies, and to prove that if every man in St. 
 Helena became a landowner it would become 
 a very hell upon earth, and more unmanage- 
 able than it was before. If these gentlemen do 
 not sacrifice their pet fancies for the sake of a 
 settlement, what will become of St. Helena ? 
 
 Just now they were discussing Ginx's Baby. 
 One thought that repeal of the Poor-Laws and 
 a new system of relief would reach his case ; 
 another saw the root of the Baby's sorrow 
 in Trades' Unions ; a third propounded co-
 
 ig2 GINXS BABY. 
 
 operative manufactures ; a fourth suggested 
 that a vast source of income lay untouched in 
 the seas about the kingdom, which swarmed 
 with porpoises, and showed how certain parts 
 of these animals were available for food, 
 others for leather, others for a delicious oil 
 that would be sweeter and more pleasant 
 than butter ; a fifth desired a law to repress 
 the tendency of Scotch peers to evict tenants 
 and convert arable lands into sheep-walks 
 and deer-forests ; a sixth maintained that 
 there were waste lands in the kingdom of 
 capacity to support hungry millions. In fact 
 earth, heaven, and seas were to be regene- 
 rated by Act of Parliament for the benefit 
 of Ginx's Baby and the people of England. 
 Sir Charles listened impatiently, and at last 
 burst forth again. 
 
 He said : " When you consider it, what
 
 VERY BROAD VIEWS. 1 93 
 
 we are all trying to do nowadays is — vul- 
 garly — to improve the breed : but we go to 
 work in a round-about way. At the outset 
 we are met by the depreciated state of part 
 of the existing generation ; and one pro- 
 blem is to prevent these depreciated people 
 from increasing, or to get them to increase 
 healthily. No one seems to have gone 
 directly to such a problem as that. The 
 difficulties to be faced are tremendous. Your 
 dirtiest British youngster is hedged round 
 with principles of an inviolable liberty and 
 rights of Habeas Corpus. You let his father 
 and mother, or any one who will save you 
 the trouble of looking after him, mould him 
 in his years of tenderness as they please. 
 If they happen to leave him a walking in- 
 valid, you take him into the poorhouse ; if 
 they bring him up a thief, you whip him 
 
 O
 
 iq4 GINXS BABY. 
 
 and keep him at high cost at Millbank or • 
 Dartmoor ; if his passions, never controlled, 
 break out into murder and rape, you may 
 hang him, unless his crime has been so 
 atrocious as to attract the benevolent inte- 
 rest of the Home Secretary ; if he commit 
 suicide, you hold a coroner's inquest, which 
 also costs money ; and however he dies you 
 give him a deal coffin and bury him. Yet 
 I may prove to you that this being, whom 
 you treat like a dog at a fair, never had 
 a day's — no, nor an hour's — contact with 
 goodness, purity, truth, or even human 
 kindness ; never had an opportunity of 
 learning anything better. What right have 
 you then to hunt him like a wild beast, 
 and kick him and whip him, and fetter 
 him and hang him by expensive compli- 
 cated machinery, when you h£ivc done
 
 VERY BROAD VIEWS. _ I95 
 
 nothing to teach him any of the duties of 
 a citizen r" 
 
 " Stop, stop, Sir Charles ! you are too 
 virulent. There are endless means of im- 
 proving your lad — charities without num- 
 ber " 
 
 " Yes, that will never reach him." 
 
 " Never mind, they may, you know. In- 
 dustrial schools, reformatories, asylums, hos- 
 pitals, Peabody-buildings, poor-laws. Every- 
 body is working to improve the condition of 
 the poor man. Sanitary administration goes 
 to his house and makes it habitable." 
 
 "Very," interjected Sir Charles Sterling, 
 drily. 
 
 " Factory laws protect and educate factory 
 children " 
 
 " They don't educate in one case out of 
 ten. They don't feed them, clothe them,
 
 igS GINX'S BABY. 
 
 give them amusement and cultivation, do 
 they r" 
 
 " Certainly not — that would be ridiculous." 
 "Why, the question is whether that would 
 be ridiculous!" replied Sir Charles. "I do 
 not say it can be done, but in order to trans- 
 form the next generation, what we should 
 aim at is to provide substitutes for bad 
 homes, evil training, unhealthy air, food and 
 dulness, and terrible ignorance, in happier 
 scenes, better teaching, proper conditions 
 of physical life, sane amusements, and a 
 higher cultivation. I dare say you would 
 think me a lunatic if I proposed that Govern- 
 ment should establish music-halls and gym- 
 nasia all over the country ; but you, Mr. 
 Fissure, voted for the Baths and Washhouses." 
 "Who's to pay for all this?" asked Mr. 
 Fissure, pertinently.
 
 VERY BROAD VIEWS. I97 
 
 "The State, which means society, the 
 whole of which is directly interested. I tell 
 you a million of children are crying to us 
 to set them free from the despotism of a 
 crime and ignorance protected by law." 
 
 <* That is striking ; but you are treading 
 on delicate ground. The liberty of the sub- 
 ject " 
 
 " Exactly what I expected you to say. 
 Those words can be used in defence of 
 almost any injustice and tyranny. Such 
 terms as 'political economy,' 'communism,* 
 * socialism,' are bandied about in the same 
 way. Yet propositions coming fairly within 
 these terms are often mentioned with ap- 
 proval by the very persons who cast them 
 at you. In a report of a recent Royal Com- 
 mission I find that one of the Commissioners 
 is quite as revolutionary as I am. He says
 
 198 GINX'S BABY, 
 
 it is right by law to secure that no 
 child shall be cruelly treated or mentally 
 neglected, over- worked or under-educated. 
 Some people would call that communism, I 
 fancy. But I think him to be correct as a 
 political economist in that broad proposition. 
 Why r Because a child's relation to the State 
 is wider, more permanent, and more impor- 
 tant than his relation to his parents. If he is 
 in danger of being depreciated and damned 
 for good citizenship, the State must rescue 
 him." 
 
 "A paternal and maternal government 
 together ! " cries Lord Namby — " a govern- 
 ment of nurses. You know I should like to 
 stop the production of children among the 
 lower orders. Your propositions are far in 
 advance of my radicalism. The State must 
 somcliines interfere between parent and child;
 
 VERY BROAD VIEWS. 1 99 
 
 for instance, in education or protection from 
 cruelty. But, if I understand you, you ac- 
 lually contemplate a general refining and 
 elevation of the working class by legislative 
 means." 
 
 "Assuredly : I should aim to cultivate their 
 morals, refine their tastes, manners, habits. 
 I wish to lift from them that ever-depressing 
 sense of hopelessness which keeps them in the 
 dust." 
 
 " So do most men ; but you must do that 
 by personal and private influences, not by 
 State enactments. How would you do it r" 
 
 "How? I think I could draw up a pro- 
 gramme. For instance : Expatriate a million 
 to reduce the competition that keeps poor 
 devils on half-rations or sends them to the 
 poorhouse; Take all the sick, maimed, old, and 
 incapable poor into workhouses managed by
 
 200 GINXS BABY. 
 
 humane men and not by ghouls ; Forbid such 
 people to marry and propagate weakness ; 
 Legislate for compulsory improvements of 
 workmen's dwellings, and, if needful, lend 
 the money to execute it ; Extend and enforce 
 the health laws ; Open free libraries and places 
 of rational amusement with an imperial 
 bounty through the country; Instead of 
 spending thousands on diletta7ifi sycophants 
 at one end of the metropolis, distribute your 
 art and amusement to the kingdom at large ; 
 The rich have their museums, libraries, and 
 clubs, provide them for the poor ; Establish 
 temporary homes for lying-in women ; ^lul- 
 tiply your baths and washhousos till there is 
 no excuse for a dirty person; Educate; Pro- 
 vide day schools for every proper child, and 
 
 industrial or reformatory schools for every 
 improper one; Open advanced High Schools
 
 VERY BROAD VIEWS. 20I 
 
 for the best pupils, and found Scholar- 
 ships to the Universities ; Erect other 
 schools for technical training ; Offer to teach 
 trades and agriculture to all comers for no- 
 thing — you would soon neutralise your bug- 
 bear of trades-unionism ; Teach morals, teach 
 science, teach art, teach them to amuse them- 
 selves like men and not like brutes. In a 
 land so wealthy the programme is not im- 
 practicable, though severe. As the end to be 
 attained is the welfare of future generations, 
 no good reason could be urged why they 
 should not contribute towards the cost of it 
 — a better debt to leave to posterity than the 
 incubus of an irrational war." - 
 
 Will any sane political practitioner wonder 
 to be told that at the end of this harangue 
 the smoking-room party broke up, and that 
 some, as they laughed good-humourcdly over
 
 202 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 Sterling's egregta, recalled the number of 
 glasses of inspirited seltzer swallowed by the 
 orator. He was so far in advance of the most 
 radical reformer that there was no hoj^e of 
 overtaking him for an era or two : so they 
 determined to fancy they had left him be- 
 hind. 
 
 * * 
 
 * 
 
 V. — Party Tactics — and Political Obstructions to Social 
 
 Relorm. 
 
 In the Club our hero revelled awhile under 
 the protection of Sir Charles Sterling, and the 
 petting of peers, INIembers of Parliament, and 
 loungers who swarm therein. Certain gentle- 
 men of Stock Exchange mannerism and 
 dressiness gave the protege the go-by, and 
 even sheered at those who noticed him with 
 kindness. But then these are of the men with 
 whom every question is checked by money,
 
 PARTY TACTICS. 203 
 
 and is balanced on the pivot of profit and 
 loss. I dare say some of them thought the 
 worse of Judas only because he had made so 
 small a gain out of his celebrated transaction. 
 To foster Ginx's Baby in the Club, as a recog- 
 nition of the important questions surrounding 
 him, though these questions involved hundreds 
 of thousands of other cases, was to them 
 ridiculous. Of far greater consequence was 
 it in their eyes to settle a dispute between 
 two extravagant fools at Constantinople 
 and Cairo, and quicken the sluggishness of 
 Turkish consols or Egyptian 9 per cents. I 
 do not cast stones at them ; every man must 
 look at a thing with his own eyes. 
 
 But it was curious to note how the Baby's 
 fortunes shifted in the Club. There were times 
 when he was a pet chucked under chin by the 
 elder stagers, favoured with a smile from a
 
 204 GINX'S BABY, 
 
 Cabinet Minister, and now and then blessed 
 with a nod from Mr. Joshua Hale. Then, 
 again, every one seemed to forget him, and he 
 was for months left unnoticed to the chance 
 kindness of the menials until some case 
 similar to his own happening to evoke dis- 
 cussion in the press, there would be a general 
 enquiry for him. The porter, ]\Ir. Smirke, 
 had succeeded, by means of a detective, in 
 discovering the boy's name, but his parents 
 were then half-way to Canada. 
 
 The members of the Fogey Club opposite, 
 hearing that so interesting a foundling was 
 being cherished by their opponents, politely 
 asked leave to examine him, and he occasion- 
 ally visited them. Tlicy treated him kindly 
 and discussed his condition with earnestness. 
 The leaders of the party debated whether he 
 might not with advantage be taken out of
 
 PARTY TACTICS, 205 
 
 their opponents' hands. Some thoug"ht that 
 a judicious use of him might win popularity ; 
 but others objected that it would be perilous 
 for them to mix themselves up with so doubtful 
 an interest. In the result the Fogies tipped 
 young Ginx, but did not commit themselves 
 for or against him. Thus a long time elapsed, 
 and our hero had grown old enough to be a 
 page. He had received food, clothing, and 
 goodwill, but no one had thought of giving 
 him an education. Sometimes he became 
 obstreperous. He played tricks with the 
 Club cutlery, and diverted its silver to im- 
 proper uses; he laid traps for upsetting 
 aged and infirm legislators ; he tried the 
 coolness of the youngest and best-natured 
 Members of Parliament by popping up in 
 strange places and exhibiting unseemly atti- 
 tudes. At length, by unanimous consent,
 
 2o6 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 he was decreed to be a nuisance, and a few 
 days would have revoked his license at the 
 Club. 
 
 No sooner did the Fogies get wind of 
 this than they manoeuvred to get Ginx's 
 Baby under their own management. They 
 instructed their "organs," as they called them, 
 to pipe to popular feeling on the disgraceful 
 apathy of the Radicals in regard to the 
 foundling. They had him waylaid and treated 
 to confectionery by their emissaries ; and once 
 or twice succeeded in abducting him and 
 sending him down to the country with their 
 party's candidates, lor exhibition at elections. 
 
 The Radicals resented this conduct ex- 
 tremely. Ginx's Baby was brought back to 
 the Club and restored to favour. The Govern- 
 ment papers were instructed to detail how 
 much he was petted and talked about by the
 
 PARTY TACTICS. 207 
 
 party; to declare how needless was the 
 popular excitement on his behalf; and to 
 prove that he must, without any special legis- 
 lation, be benefited by the extraordinary 
 organic changes then being made in the 
 constitution of the country. 
 
 Sir Charles Sterling resumed his interest in 
 the boy. He had been gallantly aiding his 
 party in other questions. There was the 
 Timbuctoo question. A miserable desert 
 chief had shut up a wandering Englishman, 
 not possessed of wit enough to keep his 
 head out of danger. There was a general 
 impression that English honour was at stake, 
 and the previous Fogey Government had 
 ordered an expedition to cross the desert and 
 punish the sheikh. You would never believe 
 what it cost if you had not seen the bill. Ten 
 millions sterling was as good as buried in
 
 2o8 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 the desert, when one tenth of it would have 
 saved a hundred thousand people from star- 
 vation at home, and one hundredth part of 
 it would have taken the fetters off the hapless 
 prisoner's feet. 
 
 There was the St. Helena question always 
 brooding over Parliament. St. Helena was 
 a constituent part of the British Empire. 
 Every patriot agreed that the Empire with- 
 out it would be incomplete ; and was so far 
 right that its subtraction would have left the 
 Empire by so much less. Most of its inha- 
 bitants were aboriginal — a mercurial race, 
 full of fire, quick-witted, and gifted with the 
 exuberant eloquence of savages, but deficient 
 in dignity and self-control. Before any one 
 else had been given them by Providence to 
 fight, they slaughtered and ravaged one an- 
 other. Our intrusive British ancestors stepped
 
 PARTY TACTICS. 209 
 
 upon the island, and, being strong men, 
 mowed down the islanders like wheat, and 
 appropriated the lands their swords had 
 cleared. Still the aborigines held out in 
 corners, and defied the conquerors. The 
 latter ground them down, confiscated the 
 property of their half-dozen chiefs, and dis- 
 tributed it among themselves. By way of 
 showing their imperial imperiousness, they 
 built over some ruins left by their devasta- 
 tions a great church, in which they ordered 
 all the islanders to worship This was at 
 first abomination to the islanders, who fought 
 like devils whenever they could, and ended by 
 accepting the religion of their foes. But the 
 conquerors, afterwards choosing to change 
 their own faith, resolved that the islanders 
 should do so too. Forthwith they confis- 
 cated the big church and burying-ground, 
 
 P
 
 2IO GINXS BABY. 
 
 and, distributing part of the land and 
 spoils among their most prominent scamps, 
 erected a new edifice of quite a ditierent 
 character, in which the natives swore they 
 could neither see nor hear, and their own 
 clerics warned them they would certainly be 
 damned. To make the complications more 
 intricate, these clerics owed allegiance to an 
 ancient woman in a distant country, who had 
 all the meddlesomeness and petty jealousy of 
 her sex, and was, besides, much attached to 
 some clever wooers of hers, wily sinners who 
 covered their aims under the semblance of 
 ultra-extreme passion for her. The prominent 
 scamps died, to be succeeded by their chil- 
 dren, or other of the hated conquerors, from 
 generation to generation. The islanders went 
 on increasing and protesting. They starved 
 upon the lands, and shot the landlords when
 
 PARTY TACTICS. 211 
 
 a few gave tliem the chance, for most lived 
 away in their own country, and left the pro 
 perty to be administered by agents. The 
 Home Government had again and again been 
 obliged to assist these people with soldiers, 
 to provide an armed police, to shoot down 
 mobs, to catch a ringleader here or there and 
 send him to Fernando Po, or to deprive whole 
 villages of ordinary civil rights. Then the 
 yam crop failed, and nearly half the people 
 left the island and crossed the seas, where 
 they continued to hate and to plot against 
 those whose misfortune it had been to get a 
 legacy of the island from their fathers. It 
 would be wearisome to recount the absurdities 
 on both sides : the stupidity or criminal ab- 
 sence of tact from time to time shown by the 
 Home Government — the resolve never to be 
 quiet exhibited by the natives, under the
 
 212 GINXS BABY. 
 
 prompting of their clerics. Upon 
 
 " — that common stage of novelty — " 
 
 there were ever springing up fresh difficulties. 
 Secret clubs were formed for murder and 
 reprisal. A body called the " Yellows " had 
 bound themselves by private oaths to keep 
 up the memory of the religious victories of 
 their predecessors, and to worry the clerical 
 party in every possible way. Their pleasure 
 was to go about insanely blowing rams'- 
 horns, carrying flags and bearing oranges in 
 their hands. The islanders hated oranges, 
 and at every opportunity cracked the skulls 
 of the orange-bearers with brutal weapons 
 peculiar to the island. These, in return, 
 cracked native skulls. The whole island was 
 in a state of perpetual commotion. Still, 
 its general condition improved, its farms
 
 PARTY TACTICS. 213 
 
 grew prosperous, and a joint-stock com- 
 pany had built a mill for converting cocoa- 
 nut fibre into horse-cloths, which yielded 
 large profits. The memory of past events 
 might well have been buried ; but the clerics, 
 in the interest of the old woman, fanned the 
 embers, and the infamous bidding for popu- 
 larity of parties at home served to keep alive 
 passions that would naturally have died out. 
 Besides, latterly folly had been too organised 
 on both sides to suffer oblivion. Every- 
 body was tired of the squabbles of St. 
 Helena. At length there was a general 
 movement in the interests of peace, and to 
 pacify the islanders Parliament was asked to 
 pull down the wings of the old church edifice, 
 remove some of the graves, and cut off a large 
 piece of the graveyard. Some were in favour 
 also of dividing all the farms in the country'
 
 214 GINXS BABY. 
 
 among the aborigines, but the difficulty was 
 to know how at the same time to satisfy the 
 present occupiers. These schemes were topics 
 of high debate, upon them the fortunes of 
 Government rose and fell, and while they 
 were agitated Ginx's Baby could have no 
 chance of a parliamentary hearing. 
 
 Many other matters of singular indifference 
 had eaten up the legislative time ; but at last 
 the increasing number of wretched infants 
 throughout the country began to alarm the 
 people, and Sir Charles Sterling thought the 
 time had come to move on behalf of Ginx's 
 Baby and his fellows. 
 
 « • 
 
 VI. — Amateur Debating in a IIit,'h Legislative Body. 
 
 While Sir Charles was trying to get the 
 Government to " give him a night " to debate
 
 AMATEUR DEBATING. 215 
 
 the Ginx's Baby case, and while associations 
 were being formed in the metropolis for dis- 
 posing of him by expatriation or otherwise, 
 a busy peer, without notice to anybody, 
 suddenly brought the subject before the 
 House of Lords. As he had never seen the 
 Baby, and knew nothing or very little about 
 him, I need scarcely report the elaborate 
 speech in which he asked for aristocratic 
 sympathy on his behalf. He proposed to 
 send him to the Antipodes at the expense 
 of the nation. 
 
 The Minister for the Accidental Accom- 
 paniments of the Empire was a clever man 
 —keen, genial, subtle, two-edged, a gentle- 
 manly and not thorough disciple of Machiavel ; 
 able to lead parliamentary forlorn hopes and 
 plant flags on breaches, or to cover retreats 
 with brilliant skirmishing ; deft, but never
 
 2l6 GINX'S BABY. 
 
 deep ; much moved too by the opinions of his 
 permanent staff. These on the night in ques- 
 tion had plied him well with hackneyed objec- 
 tions ; but to see him get up and relieve 
 himself of them — the air of originality, the 
 really original air he threw around them ; 
 the absurd light which he turned full on the 
 weaknesses of his noble friend's propositions, 
 was as beautiful to an indifferent critic as it 
 was saddening to the man who had at heart 
 the sorrows of his kind. If that minister 
 lived long he would be forced to adopt and 
 advocate in as pretty a manner the policy 
 he was dissecting. 
 
 Lord Munnibagge, a great authority in 
 economic matters, said that a weaker case 
 liad never been presented to Parliament. 
 To send away Ginx's Baby to a colony at 
 imperial expense was at once to rob the 
 pockets of the rich and to decrease our
 
 AMATEUR DEBATING. 217 
 
 labour-power. There was no necessity for 
 it. Gmx's Baby could not starve in a 
 country like this. He (Lord Munnibagge) 
 had never heard of a case of a baby starving. 
 Ihere was no such wide-spread distress as 
 was represented by the noble lord. There 
 were occasional periods of stagnation in 
 trade, and no doubt in these periods the 
 poorer classes would suffer ; but trade was 
 elastic ; and even if it were granted that 
 the present was a period when employment 
 had failed, the time was not far off when 
 trade would recuperate. (Cheers.) Ginx's 
 Baby and all other babies would not then 
 wish to go away. People were always 
 making exaggerated statements about the 
 condition of the poor. He (Lord Munni- 
 bagge) did not credit them. He believed 
 the country, though temporarily depressed 
 b}'' financial collapses, to be in a most healthy
 
 2t8 ginx's baby. 
 
 state. (Hear, hear.) It was absurd to say 
 otherwise, when it was shown by the Board 
 of Trade returns that we were growing richer 
 every day. (Cheers.) Of course Ginx's Baby 
 must be growing richer with the rest. Was 
 not that a complete answer to the noble lord's 
 plaintive outcries. (Cheers and laughter.) 
 That the population of a country was a great 
 fraction of its wealth was an elementary prin- 
 ciple of political economy. He thought, from 
 the high rates of wages, that there were not 
 too many but too few labourers in the country. 
 He should oppose the motion. (Cheers.) 
 
 Two or three noble lords repeated similar 
 platitudes, guarding themselves as carefully 
 from any reference to facts, or to the ques- 
 tion whether high rates of wages might not 
 be the concomitants simply of high prices 
 of necessaries, or to the yet wider question 
 whether colonial development might not have
 
 AMATEUR DEBATING. 219 
 
 something to do with progress at home. The 
 noble lord who had rushed unprepared into 
 the arena was unequal to the forces mar- 
 shalled against him, and withdrew his motion. 
 
 Thus the great debate collapsed. The 
 Lords were relieved that an awkward ques- 
 tion had so easily been shifted. The news- 
 papers on the ministerial side declared that 
 this debate had proved the futility of the 
 Ginx's Baby Expatriation question. 
 
 " So able an authority as Lord Munni- 
 bagge had established that there was no 
 necessity for the interference of Government 
 in the case of Ginx's Baby or any other 
 babies or persons. The lucid and decisive 
 statement of the Secretary for the Accidental 
 Accompaniments of the Empire had shown 
 how impossible it was for the Imperial 
 Government to take part in a great scheme 
 of Expatriation ; how impolitic to endeavour
 
 220 GINXS BABY. 
 
 to affect the ordinary laws of free movement 
 to the Colonies." 
 
 Surely after this the Expatriation people 
 hid their lights under a bushel ! 
 
 The Government refused to find a night for 
 Sir Charles Sterling, and after the Lords' 
 debate he did not see his way to force a 
 motion in the Lower House. Meanwhile 
 Ginx's Baby once more decided a turn in his 
 own fate. Tired of the slow life of the Club, 
 and shivering amid the chill indifference 
 of his patrons, he borrowed without leave 
 some clothes from an inmate's room, with a 
 few silver forks and spoons, and decamped. 
 Whether the baronet and the Club were bash- 
 ful of public ridicule or glad to be rid of the 
 charge, I know not, but no attempt was made 
 to recover him.
 
 PART K 
 WHAT GINX'S BABY DID WITH HIINISELF. 
 
 A full-formed Horse will, in any ?narl;ef, bring- frorn iwetity io as 
 high as two hundred Friedrichs d'or : such is his worth to the world. 
 A full- formed Man is fiot only worth notliing to the world, but the 
 •world could afford hi?n a round sum would he simply engage io go and 
 hang himself, — Sartor Resartus. 
 
 The Last Chapter. 
 
 /^UR hero was nearly fifteen years old 
 when he left the Club to plunge into the 
 world. He was not long in converting his 
 spoils into money, and a very short time in 
 spending it. Then he had to pit his wits 
 against starvation, and some of his throws were 
 desperate. Wherever he went the world 
 seemed terribly full. If he answered an adver- 
 tisement for an errand-boy, there were a score 
 kicking their heels at the rendezvous before 
 him. Did he try to learn a useful trade, thou-
 
 222 GINXS BABY. 
 
 sands of adepts were not only ready to under- 
 bid him, but to knock him on the head for an 
 interloper. Even the thieves, to whom he gravi- 
 tated, were jealous of his accession, because 
 there were too many competitors already in 
 their department. Through his career of 
 penury, of honest and dishonest callings, of 
 'scapes and captures, imprisonments and 
 other punishments, a year's reading of Me- 
 tropolitan Police Reports would furnish the 
 exact counterpart. 
 
 I don't know how many years after his 
 flight from Pall ]\Iall, one dim midnight, 
 I, returning from Richmond, lounged over 
 Vauxhall Bridge, listening to the low lap- 
 ping of the current beneath the arches — look- 
 ing above to the stars and along the dark 
 polished surface that reflected a thousand
 
 THE LAST CHAPTER. 223 
 
 lights in its undulations, — feeling the awful- 
 ness of the dense, suppressed life that was 
 wrapt within the gloom and calm of the hour. 
 I suddenly saw a shadow, a human shadow, 
 that at the sound of my footstep quickly 
 crossed my dreamy vision — quickly, noise- 
 lessly came and went before my eyes until 
 it stood up high and outlined against the 
 strangely-mingled haze. It looked like the 
 ghost of a slight-formed man, hatless and 
 coatless, and for a moment I saw at its 
 upper extremity the dull flash as of a human 
 face in the gloom, before the shadow leaped 
 out far into the night. Splash ! When my 
 startled eyes looked down upon the glancing, 
 waving ebony, I thought I could trace a white 
 coruscation of foam spreading out into the 
 darkness, instantly to dissipate and be lost 
 for ever.
 
 224 GINX'S BAP.Y. 
 
 I did not then know what form it was that 
 swilled down below the glistening current. 
 Had I known that it was Ginx's Baby I 
 should perhaps have thought : " Society, 
 which, in the sacred names of Law and 
 Charity, forbad the father to throw his child 
 over Vauxhall Bridge, at a time when he was 
 alike unconscious of life and death, has at 
 last itself driven him over the parapet into 
 the greedy waters " 
 
 Philosophers, Philanthropists, Politicians, 
 Papists and Protestants, Poor-Law Ministers 
 and Parish Ofiicers — while you have been 
 theorising and discussing, debating, wrang- 
 ling, legislating and administering — Good 
 God ! gentlemen, between you all, where has 
 Ginx's Baby gone to ? 
 
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