1 7 fa COLLECTED EDITION OF THE NOVELS AND TALES BY THE EIGHT HONOKABLE B. DISEAELL VOL. VII.GONTARINI FLEMING and THE RISE OF ISKANDER. LONDON: PHINTED BT SPOTTISWOODR AND CO., HKW-STKKKT 8QPABK A.>n PABLIAMBNT STRFFT CONTAEINI FLEMING A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. THE EISE OF ISKANDER EIGHT HONORABLE B. DISRAELI. NEW EDITION. LONDON : LONGMANS, GREEN, AND CO. 1871. Ml riijht PREFACE TO CONTAKINI FLEMING. THE AUTHOR proposed to himself, in writing this work, a subject that has ever been held one of the most difficult and refined, and which is virgin in the imaginative literature of every country namely, the development and formation of the poetic character. It has, indeed, been sometimes incidentally treated, and partially illustrated by writers of the highest class, as for instance Grothe in his Wilhelm Meister,' where are expounded, with so much felicity, the mysteries of predisposition ; and the same illustrious author has, in his capricious memoirs, favoured us with much of his individual experience of self-formation ; in this resem- bling preceding poets, none more conspicuously than Count Alfieri. But an ideal and complete picture of the development of the poet had not been produced, nor had any one entirely grappled with the thorough formation of that mysterious character with which, though unlike all of us, we all of us so strangely sympathise. 2024136 VI PKEFACE. When the author meditated over the entireness of the subject, it appeared to him that the auto-biogra- phical form was a necessary condition of a successful fulfilment. It seemed the only instrument that could penetrate the innermost secrets of the brain and heart in a being, whose thought and passion were so much cherished in loneliness, and revealed often only in solitude. In the earlier stages of the theme the self- discoverer seemed an indispensable agent. What narrative by a third person could sufficiently paint the melancholy and brooding childhood, the first in- dications of the predisposition, the growing conscious- ness of power, the reveries, the loneliness, the doubts, the moody misery, the ignorance of art, the failures, the despair? Having adopted this conclusion, the author then endeavoured to conceive a character whose position in life should be at variance, and, as it were, in constant conflict with his temperament; and the accidents of whose birth, nevertheless, tended to develop his psychology. The combination that connected in one being Scandinavia and the South, and made the image of a distant and most romantic city continually act upon a nervous temperament, surrounded by the snows and forests of the North, though novel, it is believed, in literature, was by no means an impossible or even improbable one. Pursuing an analogous construction, it was resolved, that the first great passion of the poet, the one that would give a colour to the life of such an individual, r PKEFACE. vii should arise out of the same circumstance ; and in harmony, it is thought, with an organisation of a susceptibility so peculiar, this critical passage in his life is founded upon the extreme mysteries of sym- pathy, and carried on by the influences of animal magnetism. This book, written with great care, after deep medi- tation, and in a beautiful and distant land favourable to composition, with nothing in it to attract the passions of the hour, was published anonymously in the midst of a revolution (1831-2); and it seemed that it must die. But gradually it has gained the sympathy of the thoughtful and the refined, and it has had the rare fortune of being cherished by great men. Now it is offered to a new generation, and bears the name of its author, because, on critically examining it, he finds that, though written in early youth, it has accomplished his idea. Were* he equal to his subject, the book would last, for that subject is eternal. GROSVENOR GATE: July, 1845. CONTAJ3INI FLEMING. CHAPTER I. WANDERING in those deserts of Africa that border the Ery- thraean Sea, I came to the river Nile, to that ancient, and mighty, and famous stream, whose waters yielded us our earliest civilisation, and which, after having witnessed the formation of so many states and the invention of so many creeds, still flow on with the same serene beneficence, like all that we can conceive of Deity ; in form sublime, in action systematic, in nature bountiful, in source unknown. My solitary step sounded in the halls of the Pharaohs. I moved through those imperial chambers supported by a thousand columns, and guarded by colossal forms seated on mysterious thrones. I passed under glittering.gates meet to receive the triumphant chariot of a Titan : I gazed on sublime obelisks pointing to the skies, whose secrets their mystic characters affected to conceal. Wherever I threw my sight I beheld vast avenues of solemn sphinxes reposing in supernatural beauty, and melancholy groups of lion- visaged kings ; huge walls vividly pictured with the sacred rites and the domestic offices of remote antiquity, or sculp- tured with the breathing forms of heroic warfare. And all this might, all this magnificence, all this mystery, all this beanity, all this labour, all this high invention, here were their originators ? I fell into deep musing. B 2 CONTAEINI FLEMING: And the kingdoms of the earth passed before me, from the thrones of the Pharaohs to those enormous dominations that sprang out of the feudal chaos, the unlawful children of ignorance and expediency. And I surveyed the genera- tions of man from Rameses the great, and Memnon the beautiful, to the solitary pilgrim, whose presence now violated the sanctity of their gorgeous sepulchres. And I found that the history of my race was but one tale of rapid destruction or gradual decay. And in the anguish of my heart I lifted up my hands to the blue aether, and I said, ' Is there no hope ! What is knowledge, and what is truth ? How shall I gain wisdom ? ' The wind arose, the bosom of the desert heaved, pillars of sand sprang from the earth and whirled across the plain ; sounds more awful than thunder came rushing from the south ; the fane and the palace, the portal and the obelisk, the altar and the throne, the picture and the frieze, disap- peared from my sight, and darkness brooded over the land. I knelt down and hid my face in the moveable and burning soil, and as the wind of the desert passed over me, me- thought it whispered, ' Child of Nature, learn to unlearn ! ' We are the slaves of false knowledge. Our memories are filled with ideas that have no origin in truth. We learn nothing from ourselves. The sum of our experience is but a dim dream of the conduct of past generations, generations that lived in a total ignorance of their nature. Our in- structors are the unknowing and the dead. We study human nature in a charnel-house, and, like the nations of the East, we pay divine honours to the maniac and the fool. A series of systems have mystified existence. We believe what our fathers credited, because they were con- vinced without a cause. The faculty of thought has been destroyed. Yet our emasculated minds, without the power of fruition, still pant for the charms of wisdom-. It is this that makes us fly with rapture to false knowledge, to A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. tradition, to prejudice, to custom. Delusive tradition, destructive prejudice, degenerating custom ! It is this that makes us prostrate ourselves with reverence before the wisdom of bygone ages, in no one of which has man been the master of his own reason. I am desirous of writing a book which shall be all truth : a work of which the passion, the thought, the action, and even the style, should spring from my own experience of feeling, from the meditations of my own intellect, from my own observation of incident, from my own study of the genius of expression. When I turn over the pages of the metaphysician, I perceive a science that deals in words instead of facts. Arbitrary axioms lead to results that violate reason ; ima- ginary principles establish systems that contradict the common sense of mankind. All is dogma, no part demon- stration. Wearied, perplexed, doubtful, I throw down the volume in disgust. When I search into my own breast, and trace the development of my own intellect, and the formation of my own character, all is light and order. The luminous succeeds to the obscure, the certain to the doubtful, the intelligent to the illogical, the practical to the impossible, and I experience all that refine.d and ennobling satisfaction that we derive from the discovery of truth, and the contempla- tion of nature. I have resolved, therefore, to write the history of my own life, because it is the subject of which I have the truest knowledge. At an age when some have scarcely entered upon their career, I can look back upon past years spent in versatile adventure and long meditation. My thought has been the consequence of my organisation : my action the result of a necessity not less imperious. My fortune and my intelli- gence have blended together, and formed my character. B 2 4 CONTAUISI FLEMING: I am desirous of executing this purpose while my brain is still fed by the ardent, though tempered, flame of youth ; while I can recall the past with accuracy, and record it with vividness ; while my memory is still faithful, and while the dewy freshness of youthful fancy still lingers on my mind. I would bring to this work the illumination of an intellect emancipated from the fatal prejudices of an irrational education. This may be denied me. Yet some exemption from the sectarian prejudices that embitter life may surely be expected from one who, by a curious combination of circumstances, finds himself without country, without kindred, and without friends ; nor will he be suspected of indulging in the delusion of worldly vanity, who, having acted in the world, has retired to meditate in an inviolate solitude, and seeks relief from the overwhelming vitality of thought in the flowing spirit of poetic creation. CHAPTER II. WHEN I can first recall existence, I remember myself a melancholy child. My father, Baron Fleming, was a Saxon nobleman of ancient family, who, being opposed to the French interest, quitted his country at the commencement of this century, and after leading for some years a wander- ing life, entered into the service of a northern court. At Venice, yet a youth, he married a daughter of the noble house of Coutarini, and of that marriage I was the only offspring. My entrance into this world was marked with evil, for my mother yielded up her life while investing me with mine. I was christened with the name of her illus- trious race. Thus much during the first years of my childhood I casually learnt, but I know not how. I feel I was early conscious that my birth was a subject on which A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 5 it was proper that I should not speak, and one, the mention of which, it was early instilled into me, would only occa- sion my remaining parent bitter sorrow. Therefore upon this topic I was ever silent, and with me, from my earliest recollection, Venice was a name to be shunned My father again married. His new bride was a daughter of the country which had adopted him. She was of high blood, and very wealthy, and beautiful in the fashion of her land. This union produced two children, both males. As a child, I viewed them with passive antipathy. They were called my brothers, but Nature gave the lie to the reiterated assertion. There was no similitude between us. Their blue eyes, their flaxen hair, and their white visages claimed no kindred with my Venetian countenance. Wherever I moved I looked around me, and beheld a race different from myself. There was no sympathy between my frame and the rigid clime whither I had been brought to live. I knew not why, but I was unhappy. Had I found in one of my father's new children a sister, all might have been changed. In that sweet and singular tie I might have discovered solace, and the variance of constitution would perhaps between different sexes have fostered, rather than discouraged, affection. But this blessing was denied me. I was alone. I loved my father dearly and deeply, but I seldom saw him. He was buried in the depth of affairs. A hurried kiss and a passing smile were the fleeting gifts of his affection. Scrupulous care, however, was taken that I should never be, and should never feel, neglected. I was overloaded with attentions, even as an infant. My step- mother, swayed by my father, and perhaps by a well- regulated mind, was vigilant in not violating the etiquette of maternal duty. No favour was shown to my white brethren which was not extended also to me. To me also, as the eldest, the preference, if necessary, was ever yielded. 6 CONTAEINI FLEMING : But for the rest, she was cold and I was repulsive, and she stole from the saloon, which I rendered interesting by no infantile graces, to the nursery, where she could lavish her love upon her troublesome but sympathising offspring, and listen to the wondrous chronicle, which their attendants daily supplied, of their marvellous deeds and almost oracular prattle. Because I was unhappy I was sedentary and silent, for the lively sounds and the wild gambols of children are but the unconscious outpouring of joy. They make their gay noises, and burst into their gay freaks, as young birds in spring chant in the free air, and flutter in the fresh boughs. But I could not revel in the rushing flow of my new blood, nor yield up my frame to its dashing and voluptuous course. I could not yet analyse my feelings ; I could not, indeed, yet think ; but I had an instinct that I was diffe- rent from my fellow- creatures, and the feeling was not triumph, but horror. My quiet inaction gained me the reputation of stupidity. In vain they endeavoured to conceal from me their impres- sion. I read it in their looks, in their glances of pity full of learned discernment, in their telegraphic exchanges of mutual conviction. At last, in a moment of irritation, the secret broke from one of my white brothers. I felt that the urchin spoke truth, but I cut him to the ground. He ran howling and yelping to his dam. I was surrounded by the indignant mother and the domestic police. I listened to their agitated accusations and palpitating threats of punish- ment with sullen indifference. I offered no defence. I courted their vengeance ; it came in the shape of imprison- ment. I was conducted to my room, and my door was locked on the outside. I answered the malignant sound by bolting it in the interior. I remained there the whole day, deaf to all their entreaties, without sustenance, feeding only upon my vengeance. Each fresh visit was an addi- A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 7 tional triumph. I never answered ; I never moved. De- mands of apology were exchanged for promises of pardon ; promises of pardon were in turn succeeded by offers of reward. I gave no sign. I heard them stealing on tiptoe to the portal, full of alarm, and even doubtful of my life. Scarcely would I breathe. At length the door was burst open, and in rushed the half-fainting Baroness and a posse of servants, with the children clinging to their nurses' gowns. Planted in a distant corner, I received them with a grim smile. I was invited away. I refused to move. A man-servant advanced and touched me. I stamped; I gnashed my teeth ; I gave a savage growl that made him recoil with dread. The Baroness lost her remaining pre- sence of mind, withdrew with her train, and was obliged to call in my father, to whom all was for the first time communicated. I heard his well-known step upon the stair. I beheld the face that never looked upon me without a smile ; if in care- lessness, still, still a smile. Now it was grave, but sad, not harsh. ' Contarini,' he said, in a serious but not angered voice, 'what is all this?' I burst into a wild cry; I rushed to his arms. He pressed me to his bosom. He tried to kiss away the flooding tears that each embrace called forth more plen- teously. For the first time in my life I felt happy, because, for the first time in my life, I felt loved. CHAPTER III. IT was a beautiful garden, full of terraces and arched walks of bowery trees. A tall fountain sprang up from a marble basin, and its glittering column broke in its fall into a thousand coloured drops, and woke the gleamy fish that 8 CONTARINI FLEMING: would have slept in the dim water. And I wandered about, and the enchanted region seemed illimitable, and at each turn more magical and more bright. Now a white vase shining in the light, now a dim statue shadowed in a cool grot. I would have lingered a moment at the mossv hermitage, but the distant bridge seemed to invite me to new adventures. It was only three miles from the city, and belonged to the aunt of the Baroness. I was brought hither to play. When the women met there was much kissing, and I also was kissed, but it gave me no pleasure, for I felt even then that it was a form, and I early imbibed a hatred of all this mechanical domestic love. And they sat together, and took out their work, and talked without ceasing, chiefly about the children. The Baroness retold all the wonderful stories of the nurses, many of which I knew to be false. I did not say this, but the conviction gave me, thus early, a contempt for the chatter of women. So soon as I was unobserved I stole away to the garden. Even then it was ravishing to be alone ; and although I could not think, and knew not the cause of the change, I. felt serene, and the darkness of my humour seemed to leave me, all was so new and all so beautiful. The bright sweet flowers, and the rich shrubs, and the tall trees, and the flitting birds, and the golden bees, and the gay butter- flies, and that constant and soothing hum broken only ever and anon by a strange shrill call, and that wonderful blending of brilliancy, and freshness, and perfume, and warmth, that strong sense of the loveliness and vitality of Nature which we feel amid the growing life of a fair garden, entered into my soul, and diffused themselves over my frame, softened my heart, and charmed my senses. But all this was not alone the cause of my happiness ; for to me the garden was not a piece of earth belonging to my aunt, but a fine world. I wandered about in quest of A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 9 some strange adventure, which I would fain believe, in so fair a region, must quickly occur. The terrace was a vast desert, over which I travelled for many days ; and the mazy walks, so mysterious and unworldly, were an un- explored forest fit for a true knight. And in the hermitage I sought the simple hospitality of a mild and aged host, who pointed to the far bridge as surely leading to a great fulfilment ; and my companion was a faithful esquire, whose fidelity was never wanting, and we conversed much, but most respecting a mighty ogre who was to fall beneath my puissant arm. Thus glided many a day in unconscious and creative reverie ; but sometimes, when I had explored over and over again each nook and corner, and the illimitable feeling had worn off, the power of imagination grew weak ; I found myself alone amid the sweets and sunshine, and fell sad. But I would not quit this delicious world without an effort, and I invented a new mode of mingling in its life. I reclined beneath a shady tree, and I covered my eyes with my little hand, and I tried to shut out the garish light that seemed to destroy the visions which were ever flitting before me. They came in their beauty, obedient to my call ; and I wandered in strange countries, and achieved many noble acts, and said many noble words ; and the beings with whom I acted were palpable as myself, with beautiful faces and graceful forms. And there was a brave young knight, who was my friend, and his life I ever saved ; and a lovely princess, who spoke not, but smiled ever and ever upon me. And we were lost in vast forests, and shared hard food ; and as the evening drew on we came to the gates of a castle. ' Contarini ! Contarini ! ' a voice sounded from the house, and all the sweet visions rushed away like singing-birds scared out of a tree. I was no longer a brave knight ; I was a child. I rose miserable and exhausted, and, in spito 10 CONTAEINI FLEMING: of a repeated cry, I returned with, a slow step and a sullen face. I saw that there was an unusual bustle in the house. Servants were running to and fro doing nothing, doors wero slammed, and there was much calling. I stole into the room unperceived. It was a new comer. They were all standing around a beautiful girl expanding into prime womanhood, and all talking at the same time. There was also much kissing. It appeared to me that there could not be a more lovely being than the visitor. She was dressed in a blue riding- coat, with a black hat which had fallen off her forehead. Her full chestnut curls had broken loose ; her rich cheek glowed with the excitement of the meeting, and her laugh- ing eyes sparkled with social love. I gazed upon her unperceived. She must have been at least eight years my senior. This idea crossed me not then. I gazed upon her unperceived, and it was fortunate, for I was entranced. I could not move or speak. My whole system changed ; my breath left me. I panted with great difficulty ; the colour fled from my cheek, and I was sick from the blood rushing to my heart. I was seen, I was seized, I was pulled forward. I bent down my head ; they lifted it up, drawing back my curls ; they lifted it up covered with blushes. She leant down ; she kissed me. Oh ! how unlike the dull kisses of the morning ! But I could not return her embrace ; I nearly swooned upon her bosom. She praised, in her good-nature, the pretty boy, and the tone in which she spoke made me doubly feel my wretched insignificance. The bustle subsided ; eating succeeded to talking. Our good aunt was a great priestess in the mysteries of plum- cake and sweet wine. I had no appetite. This was the fruitful themo of much discussion. I could not eat ; I thought only of the fair stranger. They wearied me with A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. U their wonderment and their inquiries. I was irritated, and I was irritable. The Baroness schooled me in that dull tedious way which always induces obstinacy. At another time I should have been sullen, but my heart was full and softened, and I wept. My stepmother was alarmed lest, in an unguarded moment, she should have passed the cold, strict line of maternal impartiality which she had laid down for her constant regulation. She would have soothed me with commonplace consolation. I was miserable and dis- gusted. I fled again to the garden. I regained with hurrying feet my favourite haunt. Again I sat under my favourite tree ; but not now to build castles of joy and hope, not now to commune with my beautiful creation, and revel in the warm flow of my excited fancy. All, all had fled ; all, all had changed. I shivered under the cold horror of my reality. I thought I heard beautiful music, but it was only the voice of a woman. ' Contarini,' said the voice, ' why do you weep ? ' I looked up ; it was the stranger, it was Christiana. 'Because,' I answered, sobbing, 'I am miserable.' ' Sweet boy,' she said, as she knelt down beside me, ' dry, dry your tears, for we all love you. Mamma meant not to be cross.' ' Mamma ! She is not my mamma.' ' But she loves you like a mother.' ' No one loves me.' ' All love you dearest ! I love you ; ' and she kissed me with a thousand kisses. ' 0, Christiana ! ' I exclaimed, in a low tremulous voice, ' love me, love me always! If you do not love me, I shall die ! ' I threw my arms around her neck, and a gleam of rapture seemed to burst through the dark storm of my grief. She pressed me to her heart a thousand times, and each time I clung with a more ardent grasp ; and, by 12 COXTAHINI FLEMING: degrees, the fierceness of my passion died away, and heavy sobs succeeded to my torrents of tears, and light sighs at last came flying after, like clouds in a clearing heaven. Our grief dies away Kke a thunder-storm. CHAPTER IV. THE visit of Christiana was the first great incident of my life. No day passed without my seeing her, either at the Garden-house, or at our own, and each day I grew happier. Her presence, the sound of her voice, one bright smile, and I was a different being ; but her caresses, her single society, the possession of her soft hand, all this was maddening. When I was with her in the company of others I was happy, but I indicated my happiness by no exterior sign. I sat by her side, with my hand locked in hers, and I fed in silence upon my tranquil joy. But when we were alone, then it was that her influence over me broke forth. All the feelings of my heart were hers. I concealed nothing. I told her each moment that I loved her, and that until I knew her I was unhappy. Then I would communicate to her in confidence all my secret sources of enjoyment, and explained how I had turned common places into enchanted regions, where I could always fly for refuge. She listened with fondness and delight, and was the heroine of all my sports. Now I had indeed a princess. Strolling with her, the berceau was still more like a forest, and the solace of the hermit's cell still more refreshing. Her influence over me was all-powerful, for she seemed to change my habits and my temper. In kindness she entered into my solitary joys ; in kindness she joined in my fantastic amusements ; for her own temper was social, and her own delight in pastimes that were common to all. She tried to rouse me from my inaction, she counselled me A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 13 to mingle \vith my companions. How graceful was this girl ! Grace was indeed her characteristic, her charm. Sometimes she would run away swifter than an arrow, and then, as she was skimming along, suddenly stop, and turn her head with an expression so fascinating, that she appeared to me always like a young sunny fawn. ' Contarini ! ' she would cry in a clear flute-like voice. How I rushed to her ! I became more amiable to my brothers. I courted more the members of my little society. I even joined in their sports. It was whispered that Contarini was much im- proved, and the Baroness glanced at me with a kind patronising air, that seemed to hint to the initiated not to press me too heavily with their regulations, or exercise towards one so unpractised, perhaps so incapable, all the severity of their childish legislation. The visit of Christiana drew to a close. There was a children's ball at our house, and she condescended to be its mistress. Among my new companions there was a boy, who was two years my senior. He had more knowledge of the world than most of us, for he had been some time at school. He was gay, vivacious, talkative. He was the leader in all our diversions. We all envied him his superiority, and all called him conceited. He was ever with Christiana. I disliked him. I hated dancing, but to-night I had determined to dance, for the honour of our fair president. When the ball opened, I walked up to claim her hand as a matter of course. ' She was engaged ; she was engaged to this youthful hero. Engaged ! Was it true ! Engaged ! Horrible jargon ! Were the hollow forms of mature society to interfere with our play of love ? She expressed her regret, and promised to dance with me afterwards. She promised what I did not require. Pale and agitated I stole to a corner, and fed upon my mortified heart. 14 CONTAEINI FLEMING: I watched her in the dance. Never had she looked more beautiful ; what was worse, never more happy. Every smile pierced me through. Each pressure of my rival's hand touched my brain. I grew sick and dizzy. It was a terrible effort not to give way to my passion. But I succeeded, and escaped from the chamber with all its glaring lights and jarring sounds. I stopped one moment on the staircase for breath. A servant came up and asked if I wanted anything. I could not answer. He asked if I were unwell. I struggled with my choking voice, and said I was very well. I stole up to my bed-room. I had no light, but a dim moon just revealed my bed. I* threw myself upon it, and wished to die. My forehead was burning hot, my feet were icy cold. My heart seemed in my throat. I felt quite sick. I could not speak ; I could not weep ; I could not think. Every- thing seemed blended in one terrible sensation of desolate and desolating wretchedness. Much time perhaps had not elapsed, although it seemed to me an age, but there was a sound in the room, light and gentle. I looked around ; I thought that a shadowy form passed between me and the window. A feeling of terror crossed me. I nearly cried out ; but as my lips moved, a warm mouth sealed them with sweetness. ' Contarini,' said a voice I could not mistake, ' are you unwell ? ' I would not answer. ' Contarini, my love, speak to Christiana ! ' But the demon prevailed, and I would not speak. ' Contarini, you are not asleep.' Still I was silent. ' Contarini, you do not love me.' I would have been silent, but I sighed. ' Contarini, what has happened ? Tell me, tell me, dearest. Tell your Christiana. You know you always tell her everything.' A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 15 I seized her hand ; I bathed it with my fast-flowing tears. She knelt down as she did on our first meeting in the garden, and clasped me in her arms ; and each moment the madness of my mind grew greater. I was convulsed with passion. And when I grew more calm she again spoke, and asked me what made me so unhappy ; and I said, between my wild sobs, ' ! Christiana, you too have turned against me !' ' Dear, sensitive child,' she said, as she pressed me to her bosom, ' if you feel so keenly you will never be happy. Turn against you ! ! Contarini, who is your friend if not Christiana ! Do I not love you better than all the world ? Do I not do all I can to make you happy and good ? And why should I turn against Contarini, when he is the best and dearest of boys, and loves his Christiana with all his heart and soul ? ' She raised me from the bed and placed me in her lap. My head reposed upon her fond and faithful heart. She was silent, for I was exhausted, and I felt her sweet breath descending upon my cheek. ' Go,' I said, after some little time, and in a feeble voice, ' go, Christiana. They want you.' ' Not without you, dearest. I came to fetch you.' ' I cannot go. It is impossible : I am so tired.' ' Oh ! come. I shall be so unhappy if you do not come. You would not have me unhappy the whole evening, this evening that we were to be so gay. See ! I will run and fetch a light, and be with you in a moment.' And she kissed me and ran away, and in a moment returned. ' Dearest Christiana ! I cannot go. What will they think of me ? ' ' Nobody knows even that you are away : all are busy.' ' What will they think of me ? Really I cannot go ; and my eyes are so red.' 16 CONTARINI FLEMING: ' Nonsense ! They are the blackest and most beautiful eyes I ever saw.' ' Oh ! they are horridly red,' I answered, looking in the glass. ' I cannot go, Christiana.' ' They are not in the least red. I will wash them with some Eau de Cologne and water.' ' ! Christiana, do you really love me ? Have you really made it up ? ' ' I love you more than ever. There, let me brush your curls. Is this your brush ? What a funny little brush ! Dear Contarini, how pretty you look ! ' CHAPTER V. WHEN I was eight years of age a tutor was introduced into the house, and I was finally and formally emancipated from the police of the nursery and the government of women. My tutor was well qualified for his office, according to the existing ideas respecting education, which substitute for the noblest of sciences the vile art of teaching words. He was learned in his acquirements, and literary in his taste, with a calm mind, a bland manner, and a mild voice. The Baroness, who fancied herself a great judge of character, favoured him, before the commencement of his labours, with an epitome of mine. After a year's experience of his pupil, he ventured to express his opinion that I was by no means so slow as was supposed ; that, although I had no great power of application, I was not averse to acquiring knowledge ; and that if I were not endowed with any remarkable or shining qualities, my friends might be con- soled for the absence of these high powers by my being equally destitute of those violent passions and that un- governable volition usually attendant upon genius, and which too often rendered the most gifted miserable. A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 17 I was always a bad learner, and although I loved know- ledge from my cradle I liked to acquire it my own way. I think that I was born with a detestation of grammars. Nature seemed to whisper me the folly of learning words instead of ideas, and my mind would have grown sterile for want of manure if I had not taken its culture into my own hands, and compensated by my own tillage for my tutor's bad husbandry. I therefore in a quiet way read every book that I could get hold of, and studied as little as possible in my instructor's museum of verbiage, whether his specimens appeared in the anatomy of a substantive, or the still more disgusting form of a dissected verb. This period of my life, too, was memorable for a more interesting incident than the introduction of my tutor. For the first time I visited the theatre. Never shall I forget the impression. At length I perceived human beings conducting themselves as I wished. I was mad for the playhouse, and I had the means of gratifying my mania. I so seldom fixed my heart upon anything, I showed, in general, such little relish for what is called amusement, that my father accorded me his permission with pleasure and facility, and, as an attendant to this magical haunt, I now began to find my tutor of great use. I had now a pursuit, for when I was not a spectator at the theatre, at home I was an actor. I required no audience ; I was happier alone. My chivalric reveries had been long gradually leaving me : now they entirely vanished. As I learnt more of life and nature, I re- quired for my private world something which, while it was beautiful and uncommon, was nevertheless natural and could live. Books more real than fairy tales and feudal romances had already made me muse over a more real creation. The theatre at once fully introduced me to this new existence, and there arose accordingly in my mind new characters. Heroes succeeded to knights, tyrants to C 18 CONTARINI FLEMING : ogres, and boundless empire to enchanted castles. My character also changed with my companions. Before, all was beautiful and bright, but still and mystical. The forms that surrounded me were splendid, the scenes through which I passed glittering, but the changes took place without my agency, or if I acted, I fulfilled only the system of another, for the foundation was the supernatural. Now, if everything were less beautiful, everything was more earnest. I mingled with the warlike and the wise, the crafty, the suffering, the pious ; all depended upon our own exertions, and each result could only be brought about by our own simple and human energies, for the foundation was the natural. Yet at times even this fertile source of enjoyment failed, and the dark spirit which haunted me in my first years would still occasionally descend upon my mind. I knew not how it was, but the fit came upon me in an instant, and often when least counted on. A star, a sunset, a tree, a note of music, the sound of the wind, a fair face flitting by me in unknown beauty, and I was lost. All seemed vapid, dull, spiritless, and flat. Life had no object and no beauty; and I slunk to some solitary corner, where I was content to lie down and die. These were moments of agony, these were moments in which, if I were spoken to, I had no respect for persons. Once I remember my father found me before the demon had yet flown, and, for the first time, he spoke without being honoured. At last I had such a lengthened fit that it attracted uni- versal attention. I would scarcely move, or speak, or eat for days. There was a general alarm. The Baroness fell into a flutter, lest my father should think that I had been starved to death, or ill-used, or poisoned, and overwhelmed me with inquiries, each of which severely procrastinated my convalescence. For doubtless, now that I can analyse my past feelings, these dark humours arose only from the A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 19 want of being loved. Physicians were called in. There were immense consultations. They were all puzzled, and all had recourse to arrogant dogmas. I would not, nay, I could not, assist them. Lying upon the sofa, with my eyes shut, as if asleep, I listened to their conferences. It was settled that I was suffering from a want of nervous energy. Strange jargon, of which their fellow-creatures are the victims ! Although young, I looked upon these men with suspicion, if not contempt, and my after life has both in- creased my experience of their character, and confirmed my juvenile impression. Change of air and scene were naturally prescribed for an effect by men who were ignorant of the cause. It was settled that I should leave town, accompanied by my tutor, and that we should reside for a season at my father's castle. CHAPTER VI. ' AND I, too, will fly to Egeria ! ' We were discoursing of Pompilius when the thought flashed across me. I no longer listened to his remarks, and I ceased also to answer. My eyes were indeed fixed upon the page, but I perceived nothing, and as it was not yet my hour of liberty, I remained in a soft state of dreamy abstraction. When I was again free I wandered forth into the park, and I hastened, with a rushing, agitated step, to the spot on which I had fixed. It was a small dell, and round it grew tall trees with thin and light-coloured leaves. And the earth was everywhere covered with thick fern and many wild flowers. And the dell was surrounded at a slight distance by a deep wood, out of which white glancing hares each instant darted to play upon the green sunny turf. It was not indeed a c 2 20 CONTAEINI FLEMING: sparry grot cool in the sparkling splendour of a southern scene, it was not indeed a spot formed in the indefinite but lovely mould of the regions of my dreams, but it was green, and sweet, and wondrous still. I threw myself upon the soft yielding fern, and covered my eyes. And a shadowy purple tint was all that I per- ceived ; and as my abstraction grew more intense, the purple lightened into a dusky white, and this new curtain again into a glittering veil, and the veil mystically disappeared, and I beheld a beautiful and female face. It was not unlike Christiana, but more dazzling and very pensive. And the eyes met mine, and they were full of serious lustre, and my heart beat, and I seemed to whisper with a low, but almost ecstatic voice, ' Egeria ! ' Yet, in- deed, my lips did not move. And the vision beamed with a melancholy smile. And suddenly I found myself in a spacious cave, and I looked up into the face of a beautiful woman, and her countenance was the countenance of the vision. And we were in deep shade, but far out I could perceive a shining and azure land. And the sky was of a radiant purple, and the earth was streaming with a golden light. And there were blue mountains, and bright fields, and glittering vineyards. And I said nothing, but I looked upon her face, and dwelt upon her beauty. And the hours flew, and the sun set, and the dew descended. And as the sky became less warm the vision gradually died away; and I arose in the long twilight, and returned home pensive and grave, but full of a soft and palpitating joy. When I returned I could not eat. My tutor made many observations, many inquiries ; but he was a simple man, and I could always quiet him. I sat at the table, full of happiness and almost without motion ; and in the evening I stole into a corner, and thought of the coming day with all its rich strange joys. A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 21 My life was now one long stream of full felicity. It was, indeed, but one idea, but that idea was as beautiful as it was engrossing. Each day I hastened to the enchanted dell, each day I returned with renewed rapture. I had no thought for anything but nay mystic mistress. My studies, always an effort, would now have been insupportable, had 1 not invented a system by which I rendered even their restraint a new source of enjoyment. I had now so com- plete a command of my system of abstraction, that, while my eye apparently was employed and interested with my allotted page, I, in fact, perceived nothing but my visionary nymph. My tutor, who observed me always engrossed, could not conceive that I was otherwise than a student, and, when I could remember, I would turn over a leaf, or affect with much anxiety to look out a word in the lexicon, so that his deception was perfect. Then, at the end of the day, I would snatch some hasty five minutes to gain an imperfect acquaintance with my task, imperfect enough to make him at length convinced that the Baroness' opinion of my in- tellect was not so erroneous as he had once imagined. A short spring and a long summer had passed away thus delightfully, and I was now to leave the castlo and return to the capital. The idea of being torn away from Egeria was harrowing. I became again melancholy, but my grief was tender, not savage. I did not recur to my ancient gloom, for I was prevented by the consoling conviction that I was loved. Yet to her the sad secret must be confided. I could not quit her without preparation. How often in solitaiy possession of the dreadful fact, have I gazed upon her incomparable face ; how often have I fancied that she was conscious of the terrible truth, and glanced reproach- fully even amid her looks of love ! It was told : in broken accents of passionate woe, with streaming eyes, and amid embraces of maddening rapture, it was told. I clung to her, I would have clung to her for 22 CONTAKINI FLE1UNG: ever, but a dark and irresistible destiny doomed us to part, and I was left to my uninspired loneliness. Returning home from my last visit to the dell I met my tutor. He came upon me suddenly, otherwise I would have avoided him, as at this moment I would have avoided any- thing else human. My swollen cheeks, my eyes dim with weeping, my wild and broken walk, attracted even his attention. He inquired what ailed me. His appearance, so different from the radiant being from whom I had lately parted, his voice so strange after the music which yet lin- gered in my ear, his salutation so varying in style from the one that ever welcomed me, and ever and alone was wel- come, the horrible contrast that my situation formed with the condition I had that instant quitted, all this overcame me. I expressed my horror by my extended arms and my averted head. I shuddered and swooned. CHAPTER VII. ALTHOUGH I have delineated with some detail the feelings of my first boyhood, I have been indebted for this record to the power of a faithful and analytic memory, and not to an early indulgence in the habits of introspection. For indeed, in these young years, I never thought about myself, or if some extraordinary circumstance impelled me to idiosyn- cratic contemplation, the result was not cheering. For I well remember that when, on the completion of my eleventh year, being about to repair to a College, where I was to pass some years preparatory to the University, I meditated on this great and coming change, I was impressed with a keen conviction of inferiority. It had sometimes, indeed, crossed my mind that I was of a different order from those around me, but never that the difference was in my favour ; and, brooding over the mortifying contrast, which my A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 23 exploits exhibited in my private and my public world, and the general opinion which they entertained of me at home, I was at times strongly tempted to consider myself even half a fool. Though change was ever agreeable, I thought of the vicissitude that was about to occur with the same appre- hension that men look forward to the indefinite horror of a terrible operation. And the strong pride that supported me under the fear, and forbade me to demonstrate it, was indeed the cause of my sad forebodings. For I could not tolerate the thought that I should become a general jest and a common agent. And when I perceived the state pre- paring for me, and thought of Egeria, I blushed. And that beautiful vision, which had brought me such delicious solace, was now only a source of depressing mortification. And for the first time in my life, in my infinite tribulation, and in the agony of my fancy, I mused why there should be such a devilish and tormenting variance between my thought and my action. The hour came, and I was placed in the heart of a little and busy world. For the first time in my life I was sur- rounded by struggling and excited beings. Joy, hope, SOITOW, ambition, craft, courage, wit, dulness, cowardice, beneficence, awkwardness, grace, avarice, generosity, wealth, poverty, beauty, hideousness, tyranny, suffering, hypocrisy, truth, love, hatred, energy, inertness ; they were all there, and all sounded, and moved, and acted, about me. Light laughs, and bitter cries, and deep imprecations, and the deeds of the friendly, the prodigal, and the tyrant, and the exploits of the brave, the graceful, and the gay, and the flying words of native wit, and the pompous sentences of ac- quired knowledge ; how new, how exciting, how wonderful ! Did I tremble ? Did I sink into my innermost self ? Did I fly? Never. As I gazed upon them, a new principle rose up in my breast, and I perceived only beings whom I 24 CONTAEINI FLEMING : was determined to control. They came up to me with a curious glance of half-suppressed glee, breathless and mocking. They asked me questions of gay nonsense with a serious voice and solemn look. I answered in their kind. On a sudden I seemed endowed with new powers, and blessed with the gift of tongues. I spoke to them with a levity which was quite strange to me, a most unnatural ease. I even, in my turn, presented to them questions, to which they found it difficult to respond. Some run away to communicate their impression to their comrades, some stayed behind, but these became more serious and more natural. When they found that I was endowed with a pregnant and decided character, their eyes silently pro- nounced me a good fellow; they vied with each other in kindness, and the most important led me away to initiate me in their mysteries. Weeks flew away, and I was intoxicated with my new life and my new reputation. I was in a state of ceaseless excitement. It seemed that my tongue never paused : yet each word brought forth a new laugh, each sentence of gay nonsense fresh, plaudits. All was rattle, frolic, and wild mirth. My companions caught my unusual manner, they adopted my new phrases, they repeated my extra- ordinary apophthegms. Everything was viewed and done according to the new tone which I had introduced. It was decided that I was the wittiest, the most original, the most diverting of their society. A coterie of the congenial insensibly formed around me, and my example gradually ruled the choice spirits of our world. I even mingled in their games although I disliked the exertion, and in those in whicli the emulation was very strong I even excelled. My ambition conquered my nature. It seemed that I was the soul of the school. Wherever I went my name sounded, whatever was done my opinion was quoted. I was caressed, adored, idolised. In a word, I was popular. A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 25 Yet sometimes I caught a flying moment to turn aside and contrast my present situation with my past one. What was all this ? Was I the same being ? But my head was in a whirl, and I had not time or calmness to solve the perplexing inquiry. There was a boy and his name was Musaeus. He was somewhat my elder. Of a kind, calm, docile, mellow nature, moderate in everything, universally liked, but without the least influence, he was the serene favourite of the school. It seemed to me that I never beheld so lovely and so pen- v sive a countenance. His face was quite oval, his eyes deep blue : his rich brown curls clustered in hyacinthine grace upon the delicate rose of his downy cheek, and shaded the light blue veins of his clear white forehead. I beheld him : I loved him. My friendship was a passion. Of all our society he alone crowded not around me. He was of a cold temperament, shy and timid. He looked upon me as a being whom he could not comprehend, and rather feared. I was unacquainted with his motives, and piqued with his conduct. I gave up my mind to the acquisi- tion of his acquaintance, and of course I succeeded. In vain he endeavoured to escape. Wherever he moved, I seemed unintentionally to hover around him ; whatever he wanted, I seemed providentially to supply. In the few words that this slight intercourse called forth, I addressed him in a tone strange to our rough life ; I treated him with a courtesy which seemed to elevate our somewhat coarse condition. He answered nothing, was confused, thankful, agitated. He yielded to the unaccustomed tenderness of my manner, to the unwonted refinement of my address. He could not but feel the strange conviction that my con- duct to him was different from my behaviour to others, for in truth his presence ever subdued my spirit, and repressed my artificial and excited manner. Musaeus was lowly born, and I was noble ; he poor, and 26 CONTAKINI FLEMING: I wealthy; I had a dazzling reputation, he but good report. To find himself an object of interest, of quiet and tender regard, to one to whose notice all aspired, and who seemed to exist only in a blaze of cold hearted raillery and reckless repartee, developed even his dormant vanity. He looked upon me with interest, and this feeling soon matured into fondness. Oh ! days of rare and pure felicity, when Musaeus and myself, with our arms around each other's neck, wandered together amid the meads and shady woods that formed our limits ! I lavished upon him all the fanciful love that I had long stored up ; and the mighty passions that yet lay dor- mant in my obscure soul now first began to stir in their glimmering abyss. And, indeed, in conversing with this dear companion it was that I first began to catch some glimpses of my yet hidden nature : for the days of futurity were our usual topic, and in parcelling out their fortunes I unconsciously discovered my own desires. I was to be something great, and glorious, and dazzling ; but what, we could not determine. The camp and the senate, the sword and the scroll, that had raised and had destroyed so many states ; these were infinitely discussed. And then a life of adventure was examined, full of daring delight. One might be a corsair or a bandit. Foreign travel was what we could surely command, and must lead to much. I spoke to him, in the fulness of our sweet confidence, of the strangeness of my birth, and we marvelled together over mysterious Venice. And this led us to conspiracies, for which I fancied that I had a predisposition. But in all these scenes Musaeus was to be never absent. He was to be my heart's friend from the beginning to the death. And I mourned that nature had given me no sister, with whom I could bind him to me by a still stronger and sweeter tie. And then, with a shy, hesitating voice, for he delighted not in talking of his home, he revealed to me that he was more blessed ; A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 27 and Caroline Musseus rose up at once to me like a star, and without having seen her I was indeed her betrothed. Thus, during these bright days did I pour forth all the feelings I had long treasured up ; and in endeavouring to communicate my desires to another, I learnt to think. I ascended from indefinite reverie to palpable cogitation. I was now seldom alone. To be the companion of Musseus I participated in many pastimes, which otherwise I should have avoided, and in return he, although addicted to sports, was content, for my sake, to forego much former occupation. With what eagerness I rushed when the hour of study ceased, with what wild eagerness I rushed to resume our delicious converse ! ISTor indeed was his image ever absent from me ; and when in the hour of school we passed each other, or our countenances chanced to meet, there was ever a sweet, faint smile, that, unmarked by others, interchanged our love. A love that I thought must last for ever, and for ever flow like a clear bright stream ; yet at times my irritable passions would disturb even these sweet waters. The tem- perament of Musaaus was cold and slow. I was at first proud of having interested his affection, but as our friend- ship grew apace, I was not contented with this calm sym- pathy and quiet regard. I required that he should respond to my affection with feelings not less ardent and energetic than mine own. I was sensitive, I was jealous. I found a savage joy in harrowing his heart ; I triumphed when I could draw a tear from his beautiful eye ; when I could urge him to unaccustomed emotion ; when I forced him to assure me, in a voice of agitation, that he loved me alone, and pray me to be pacified. From sublime torture to ridiculous teasing, too often Musaeus was my victim. One day I detected an incipient dislike to myself, or a growing affection for another ; then I passed him in gloomy silence, because his indispensable 28 CONTARINI FLEMING : engagements had obliged him to refuse my invitation to our walk. But the letters with which I overwhelmed him under some of these contingencies ; these were the most violent infliction. What pages of mad eloquence ! solemn appeals, bitter sarcasms, infinite ebullitions of frantic sensi- bility. For the first time in my life I composed. I grew intoxicated with my own eloquence. A new desire arose in my mind, novel aspirations which threw light upon old and often- experienced feelings. I began to ponder over the music of language ; I studied the collocation of sweet words, and constructed elaborate sentences in lonely walks. Poor Musaeus quite sunk under the receipt of my effusions. He could not write a line ; and had he indeed been able, it would have been often difficult for him to have discovered the cause of our separations. The brevity, the simplicity of his answers were irresistible and heartrending. Yet these distractions brought with them one charm, a charm to me so captivating, that I fear it was sometimes a cause ; reconciliation was, indeed, a love-feast. The sessions of our College closed. The time came that Musseus and myself must for a moment part ; but for a moment, for I intended that he should visit me in our vacation, and we were also to write to each other every week. Yet, even under these palliating circumstances, parting was anguish. dn the eve of the fatal day we took our last stroll in our favourite meads. The whole way I wept, and leant upon his shoulder. With what jealous care I watched to see if he too shed a tear ! One clear drop at length came quiver- ing down his cheek, like dew upon a rose. I pardoned him for its beauty. The bell sounded. I embraced him, as if it sounded for my execution, and we parted. A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 29 CHAPTER VIII. I WAS once more at home, once more silent, once more alone. I found myself changed. My obscure aspirations after some indefinite happiness, my vague dreams of beauty, or palpable personifications of some violent fantastic idea, no longer inspired, no longer soothed, no longer haunted me. I thought only of one subject, which was full of earnest novelty, and abounded in interest, curious, serious, and en- grossing I speculated upon my own nature. My new life had developed many qualities, and had filled me with self- confidence. The clouds seemed to clear off from the dark landscape of my mind, and vast ambition might be distin- guished on the far horizon, rearing its head like a mighty column. My energies stirred within me, and seemed to pant for the struggle and the strife. A deed was to be done, but what ? I entertained at this time a deep con- viction that life must be intolerable unless I were the greatest of men. It seemed that I felt within me the power that could influence my kind. I longed to wave my inspir- ing sword at the head of armies, or dash into the very heat and blaze of eloquent faction. When I contrasted my feelings and my situation I grew mad. The constant jar between my conduct and my con- ceptions was intolerable. In imagination a hero, I was in reality a boy. I returned from a victorious field to be cri- ticised by a woman : in the very heart of a deep conspiracy, which was to change the fate of nations, to destroy Home or to free Venice, I was myself the victim of each petty domestic regulation. I cannot describe the insane irrita- bility which all this produced. Infinite were the complaints of my rudeness, my violence, my insufferable impertinence, incessant the threats of pains and penalties. It was uni- versally agreed that college had ruined me. A dull, slow 30 CONTAEINI FLEMING: boy I had always been ; but, at leastj .1 was tolerably kind and docile. Now, as my tutor's report correctly certified, I was not improved in intellect, and all witnessed the hor- rible deterioration of my manners and my morals. The Baroness was in despair. After several smart skir- mishes, we at length had a regular pitched battle. She began our delightful colloquy in the true style of domestic reprimand ; dull, drony nonsense, adapted, as I should hope, to no state in which human intellect can ever be found, even if it have received the full benefit of the infernal tuition of nurses, which would be only ridiculous, if its effects were not so fatally and permanently injurious. She told me that whenever I spoke I should speak in a low voice, and that I should never think for myself; that if anything were refused I should be contented, and never ask the reason why, because it was not proper ever to ask questions, particularly when we were sure that everything was done for our good ; that I should do everything that was bidden, and always be ready to conform to everybody's desires, because at my age no one should have a will of his own ; that I should never, on any account, presume to give my opinion, because it was quite impossible that one so young could have one ; that on no account, also, should I ever be irritable, which never could be permitted : but she never considered that every effect has a cause, and never attempted to discover what might occasion this irritability. In this silly, superficial way she went on for some time, repeating dull axioms by rote, and offering to me the same useless advice that had been equally thrown away upon the tender minds of her generation. She said all this, all this to me, all this to one who a moment before was a Caesar, an Alcibiades. Now I had long brooded over the connexion that subsisted between myself and this lady. I had long formed in my mind, and caught up from books, a conception of the relations which A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 31 must exist between a step-mother and her unwelcome son. I was therefore prepared. She grew pale as I described in mad heroics our exact situation. She had no idea that any people, under any circumstances, could be influenced by such violent, such wicked, such insane sentiments. She stared in stupid astonishment at my terrible and unex- pected fluency. She entirely lost her presence of mind and burst into tears, tears not of affection, but of absolute fright, the hysteric offspring of a cold, alarmed, puzzled mind. She vowed she would tell my father. I inquired with a malignant sneer, of what ? She protested she certainly would tell. I dilated on the probability of a stepdame's tale. Most certainly she would tell. I burst into a dark, foaming rage. I declared that I would leave the house, that I would leave the country, that I would submit no longer to my intolerable life, that suicide (and here I kicked down a chair) should bring me immediate relief. The Baroness was terrified out of her life. The fall of the chair was the perfection of fear. She was one of those women who have the highest respect for furniture. She could not conceive a human being, much less a boy, voluntarily kick- ing down a chair, if his feelings were not very keen indeed. It was becoming too serious. She tried to soothe me. She would not speak to my father. All should be right, all should be forgotten, if I only would not commit suicide, and not kick down the chairs. After some weeks Museeus paid his long-meditated visit. I had never, until I invited him, answered his solitary letter. I received him with a coldness which astonished me, and must have been apparent to any one but himself. I was distressed by the want of unction in my manner, and tried to compensate by a laboured hospitality which, like ice, was dazzling but frigid. Many causes perhaps conduced to occasion this change, then inscrutable to me. Since we 32 CONTAEINI FLEMING : had parted I had indulged in lofty ideas of self, and some- times remembered, with a feeling approaching to disgustful mortification, the influence which had been exercised over me by a fellow child. The reminiscence savoured too much of boyish weakness, and painfully belied my proud theory of universal superiority. At home, too, when the permis- sion for the invitation was accorded, there was much dis- cussion as to the quality of the invited. They wished to know who he was, and when informed looked rather grave. Some caution was muttered about the choice of my com- panions. Even my father, who seldom spoke to me, seemed alarmed at the prospect of a bad connexion. His intense worldliness was shocked. He talked to me for an unusual time upon the subject of school friendships, and his con- versation, which was rare, made an impression. All this influenced me, for at that age I was of course the victim of every prejudice. Must I add to all -this, what is perhaps the sad and dreary truth, that in loving all this time Musaeus with such devotion, I was in truth rather ena- moured of the creature of my imagination than the com- panion of my presence. Upon the foundation which he had supplied I had built a beautiful and enchanted palace. Unceasing intercourse was a necessary ingredient to the spell. We parted, and the fairy fabric dissolved into the clouds. Certain it is that his visit was a failure. Musoeus was too little sensitive to feel the change of my manner, and my duty as his host impelled me to conceal it. But the change was great. He appeared to me to have fallen off very much in his beauty. The Baroness thought him a little coarse, and praised the complexion of her own children, which was like chalk. Then he wanted constant attention, for it was evident that he had no resources of his own and certainly he was not very refined. But he was pleased, for he was in a new world. For the first time in his life he A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 33 moved in theatres and saloons, and mingled in the splen- dour of high civilisation. I took him everywhere ; in fact I could bear everything but to be alone with him. So he passed a very pleasant fortnight and then quitted us. How different from our last parting ! Cheerful indeed it was, and, in a degree, cordial. I extended him my hand with a patronising air, and mimicking the hollow courtesy of maturer beings, I expressed, in a flimsy voice of affected regard, a wish that he might visit us again. And six weeks before I had loved this boy better than myself, would have perilled for him my life, and shared with him my fortune ! CHAPTER IX. I RETURNED to College gloomy and depressed. Not that I cared for quitting home : I hated home. I returned in the fulness of one of my dark humours, and which promised to be one of the most terrible visitations that had ever fallen upon me. Indeed, existence was intolerable, and I should have killed myself had I not been supported by my ambition, which now each day became more quickening, so that the desire of distinction and of astounding action raged in my soul ; and when I recollected that, at the soonest, many years must elapse before I could realise my ideas, I gnashed my teeth in silent rage, and cursed my existence. I cannot picture the astonishment that pervaded our little society, when they found the former hero of their gaiety avoiding all contact and conversation, and always moving about in gloomy silence. It was at first supposed that some great misfortune had happened to me, and en- quiries were soon afloat, but nothing could be discovered. At length one of my former prime companions, I should say, perhaps, patrons, expostulated with me upon the 34 CONTAKINI FLEMING: subject : I assured him, with grim courtesy, that nothing had happened, and wished him good morning. As for Musaeus, I just contrived to greet him the first day with a faint, agonising smile, and ever after I shunned him. No- thing could annoy Musaeus long, and he would soon have forgotten his pain, as he had already, perhaps, freed his memory from any vivid recollection of the former pleasure which our friendship had undoubtedly brought him. He welcomed enjoyment with a smile, and was almost as cheer- ful when he should have been much less pleased. But although Musaeus was content to be thus quiet, the world in which he lived determined that he should be less phlegmatic. As they had nothing better to do, they took his quarrel upon themselves. ' He certainly has behaved infamously to Musseus. You know they were always together. I wonder what it can be ! As for the rest of the school, that is in comparison nothing ; but Musaeus, you know they were decided cronies. I never knew fellows more together. I wonder what it can be ! If I were Mu- saeus I certainly would come to an explanation. We must put him up to it. If Musseus asks him he cannot refuse, and then we shall know what it is all about.' They at length succeeded in beating it into poor Musaeus' head, that he had been very ill-treated and must be very unhappy, and they urged him to insist upon an explanation. But Musaaus was no hand at demanding explanation ; and he deputed the task to a friend. I was alone, sitting on a gate, in a part of the grounds which was generally least frequented, when I heard a shout which, although I could not guess its cause, sounded in my ear with something of a menacing and malignant expression. The whole school, headed by the deputy, were finding me out, in order that the important question might be urged, that the honour of Musaeus might be supported, and their own curiosity gratified. A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 35 Now at that age, whatever I may be now, I could not be driven. A soft word, and I was an Abel ; an appearance of force, and I scowled a Cain. Had Musaeus, instead of being a most common-place character, which assuredly he was, had it been in his nature to have struck out a single spark of ardent feeling, to have indulged in a single sigh of sentiment, he might perhaps yet have been my friend. His appeal might have freed me from the domination of the black spirit, and in weeping over our reconciliation upon his sensitive bosom, I might have been emancipated from its horrid thrall. But the moment that Musaeus sought to influence my private feelings by the agency of public opinion, he became to me, instead of an object of indiffer- ence, an object of disgust ; and only not of hatred, because of contempt. I did not like the shout; and when, at a considerable distance, I saw them advancing towards the gate with an eager run, I was almost tempted to retire : but I had never yet flinched in the course of my life, and the shame which I now felt at the contemplation of such an act impelled me to stay. They arrived, and gathered round me ; they did not know how to commence their great business : breathless and agitated, they looked first at their embarrassed leader and then at me. When I had waited a sufficient time for my dignity, I rose to quit the place. ' We want you, Fleming,' said the chief. ' Well ! ' and I turned round and faced the speaker. ' I tell you what, Fleming,' said he, in a rapid, nervous style, ' you may think yourself a very great man ; but we do not exactly understand the way you are going on. There is Musaeus ; you and he were the greatest friends last half, and now you do not speak to him, nor to any one else. And we all think that you should give an explanation of D 2 36 CONTARINI FLEMING : your conduct. And, in snort, we come here to know what you have got to say for yourself.' ' Do you ! ' I answered with a sneer. ' Well, what have you got to say?' he continued, in a firmer voice and more peremptory tone. ' Say ! say that either you or I must leave this gate. I was here first, but as you are the largest number, I suppose I must yield.' I turned my heel upon him, and moved. Some one hissed. I returned, and enquired in a calm, mild voice, 'Who hissed?' Now the person who hissed was a boy, who was indeed mv match in years, and perhaps in force, but a great coward. I knew it was he, because he was just the fellow who would hiss, and looked quite pale when I asked the question. Besides, no one answered it, and he was almost the only boy who, under such circumstances, would have been silent. ' Are you afraid to own it ? ' I asked, in a contemptuous tone, but still subdued. This great mob of nearly two hundred boys were very much ashamed at the predicament in which their officious and cowardly member had placed them. So their leader, proud in a fine frame, a great and renowned courage, un- rivalled achievements in combat, and two years of su- periority in age over myself, advanced a little, and said, ' Suppose I hissed, what then ? ' ' What then ! ' I exclaimed, in a voice of thunder, and with an eye of lightning, ' What then ! Why, then, I would thrash you.' There was an instantaneous flutter and agitation, and panting monosyllabic whisper in the crowd ; they were like birds, when the hawk is first detected in airy distance. Unconsciously, they withdrew like waves, and, the arena being cleared, my opponent and I were left in opposition. Apparently there never was a more unequal match; but A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 37 indeed he was not fighting with Contarini Fleming, but with a demon that had usurped his shape. ' Come on, then,' he replied, with brisk confidence. And I came, as the hail upon the tall corn. I flew at him like a wild beast ; I felt not his best blow, I beat down his fine guard, and I sent him to the ground, stunned and giddy. He was up again in a moment ; and indeed I would not have waited for their silly rules of mock combat, but have destroyed him in his prostration. But he was up again in a moment. Again I flew upon him. He fought with subtle energy, but he was like a serpent with a tiger. I fixed upon him : my blows told with the rapid precision of machinery. His bloody visage was not to be distinguished. I believe he was terrified by my frantic air. I would never wait between the rounds. I cried out in a voice of madness for him to come on. There was breath- less silence. They were thunderstruck. They were too generous to cheer their leader. They could not refrain from sympathising with inferior force and unsupported courage. Each time that he came forward I made the same dreadful spring, beat down his guard, and never ceased working upon his head, until at length my fist seemed to enter his very brain ; and after ten rounds he fell down quite blind. I never felt his blows ; I never lost my breath. He could not come to time ; I rushed forward ; I placed my knee upon his chest. ' I fight no more,' he faintly cried. ' Apologise,' I exclaimed ; ' apologise.' He did not speak. ' By heavens, apologise,' I said, ' or I know not what I shall do.' ' Never ! ' he replied. I lifted up my arm. Some advanced to interfere. ' Off,' I shouted; 'Off, off.' I seized the fallen chief, rushed through the gate, and dragged him like Achilles through the mead. At the bottom there was a dunghill. Upon it I flung the half inanimate body. 38 CONTAEINI FLEMING: CHAPTER X. I STROLLED away to one of my favourite haunts ; I was calm and exhausted : my face and hands were smeared with gore. I knelt down by the side of the stream, and drank the most delicious draught that I had ever quaffed. I thought that I should never have ceased. I felt invigorated, and a plunge in the river completed my renovation. I reclined under a branching oak, and moralised on the past. For the first time in my life I had acted. Hitherto 1 had been a creature of dreams ; but within the last month unconsciously I found myself a stirrer in existence. I per- ceived that I had suddenly become a responsible agent. There were many passions, many characters, many incidents. Love, hatred, faction, vengeance,Musseus, myself, my anta- gonist, his followers, who were indeed a world ; our soft walks, the hollow visit, the open breach, the organised party, the great and triumphant struggle. And as I mused, all these beings flitted across my vision, and all that had passed was again present, and again per- formed, except indeed that my part in the drama was of a more studied and perfect cast ; for I was conscious of much that had been omitted both in conversation and in conduct, of much that might have been finely expressed and dexte- rously achieved. And to introduce all this I indulged in imaginary scenes. There was a long interview between myself and Musseus, harrowing; a logomachy between myself and the chief of the faction, pungent. I became so excited that I could no longer restrain the outward ex- pression of my feeling. My voice broke into impassioned tones ; I audibly uttered the scornful jest. My countenance was in harmony with my speech ; my action lent a more powerful meaning to my words. And suddenly there was a great change, the order of A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 39 which I cannot trace ; for Musseus, though he looked upon me, was not Musaeus, but a youth in a distant land ; and I was there in a sumptuous dress, with a brilliant star ; and we were friends. And a beautiful woman rose up, a blend- ing of Christiana and Egeria. Both of us loved her, and she yielded herself to me, and Musasus fled for aid. And there came a king with a great power, and as I looked upon his dazzling crown, lo ! it encircled the brow of my late antagonist. And I beheld and felt all this growing and expanding life with a bliss so keen, so ravishing, that I can compare it to nothing but to joys which I was then too young even to anticipate. My brain seemed to melt into a liquid, rush- ing stream ; my blood quickened into action, too quick even to recognise pulsation ; fiery and fleet, yet delicate and soft. With difficulty I breathed, yet the oppression was delicious. But in vain I endeavour to paint the refined excitement of this first struggle of my young creation. The drama went on, nor was it now in my power to restrain it. At length, oppressed with the vitality of the beings I had formed, dazzled with the shifting brilliancy of the scenes in which they moved, exhausted with the mar- vellous action of my shadowy self, who figured before me in endless exploit, now struggling, now triumphing, now pouring forth his soul in sentences of burning love, now breathing a withering blast of proud defiance, I sought for means to lay the wild ghosts that I had unconsciously raised. I lifted my hand to my face, that had been gazing all this time in fixed abstraction upon a crimson cloud. There was a violent struggle which I did not comprehend. Everything was chaos ; but soon, as it were, a mystic music came rising out of the incongruous mass ; a mighty secret was revealed to me, all was harmony, and order, and repose, and beauty. The whirling scene no longer changed; there was universal 40 CONTAEINI FLEMING : stillness ; and the wild beings ceased their fierce action, and, bending down before me in humility, proffered their homage to their creator. * Am I, then,' I exclaimed, looking around with an asto- nished and vacant air, ' Am I then, after all, a poet ? ' I sprang up, I paced up and down before the tree, but not in thought. The perspiration ran down my forehead, 1 trembled, I panted, I was lost. I was not conscious of my existence. My memory deserted me, the rudder of my mind broke away. My thought came back ; I threw myself on the ground. 'Yes,' I exclaimed, 'beautiful beings, I will release you from the prison-house of my brain ! I will give you to freedom and to light ! You shall exist not only for me, you shall go forth to the world to delight and to conquer.' And this was the first time in my life that the idea of literary creation occurred to me ; for I disliked poetry, of which indeed I had read little, except plays ; and although I took infinite delight in prose fiction, it was only because the romance or the novel offered to me a life more congenial to my feelings than the world in which I lived. But the conviction of this day threw light upon my past existence. My imaginary deeds of conquest, my heroic aspirations, my long, dazzling dreams of fanciful adventure, were, perhaps, but sources of ideal action ; that stream of eloquent and choice expression which seemed ever flowing in my ear, was probably intended to be directed in a different channel from human assemblies, and might melt or kindle the pas- sions of mankind in silence. And the visions of beauty and the vows of love ; were they, too, to glitter and to glow only in imagination ? A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 41 CHAPTER XI. I REPAIRED the next day to my favourite tree, armed with a pencil and a paper book. My mind was, as I thought, teeming with ideas. I had composed the first sentence of my work in school-time ; it seemed to me full of music. I had repeated it a thousand times ; I was enchanted with its euphony. It was now written, fairly written. With rapture I perceived it placed in its destined position. But what followed ? Nothing. In vain I rubbed my forehead ; in vain I summoned my fancies. The traitors would not listen. My mind seemed full to the very brink, but not a drop of the rich stream overflowed. I became anxious, nervous, fretful. I walked about ; I reseated myself. Again I threw down the pencil, and was like a man disenchanted. I could scarcely recall the visions of yesterday, and if with an effort I succeeded, they appeared cold, tame, dull, life- less. Nothing can describe my blank despair. They know not, they cannot tell, the cold, dull world ; they cannot even remotely conceive the agony of doubt and despair which is the doom of youthful genius. To sigh for fame in obscurity is like sighing in a dungeon for light ; yet the votary and the captive share an equal hope. But, to feel the strong necessity of fame, and to be conscious that without intellectual excellence life must be insupportable, to feel all this with no simultaneous faith in your own power, these are moments of despondency for which no im- mortality can compensate. As for myself, repeated experiments only brought repeated failures. I would not die without a struggle, but I strug- gled only to be vanquished. One day was too hot ; another I fancied too cold. Then, again, I was not well, or perhaps I was too anxious ; I would try only a sentence each day, The trial was most mortifying, for I found, when it came 42 CONTAKINI FLEMING: to this practical test, that in fact I had nothing to write about. Yet my mind had been so full ; and even now a spark, and it would again light up ; but the flame never kindled, or, if ever I fanned an appearance of heat, I was sure only to extinguish it. Why could I not express what I seemed to feel ? All was a mystery. I was most wretched. I wandered about in great distress, for my pride was deeply wounded, and I could no longer repose on my mind with confident solace. My spirit was quite broken. Had I fought my great battle now I should certainly have been beaten. I was distracted with dis- quietude ; I had no point of refuge, hope utterly vanished. It was impossible that I could be anything ; I must always fail. I hated to think of myself; the veriest dunce in the school seemed my superior. I grew meek and dull. I learnt my dry lessons ; I looked upon a grammar with a feeling of reverence. My lexicon was constantly before me; but I made little advance. I no longer ascribed my ill progress to the uninteresting task, but to my own incapacity. I thought myself, once more, half a fool. CHAPTER XII. HAD I now been blessed with a philosophic friend, I might have found consolation and assistance ; but my instructors, to whom I had a right to look up for this aid, were, of course, wanting. The system which they pursued taught them to consider their pupils as machines, which were to fulfil a certain operation, and this operation was word-learn ;.ig. They attempted not to discover, or to develop, or to fc.rm character. Predisposition was to them a dark oracle ; or- ganisation a mystery in which they were not initiated. The human mind was with them always the same soil, and one to which they brought ever the same tillage. And mine A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 43 was considered a sterile one, for they found that their thistles did not flourish where they should have planted roses. I was ever considered a lazy, idle boy, because I required ideas instead of words. I never would make any further exertion than would save me from their punishments: their rewards I did not covet. Yet I was ever reading, and in general knowledge was immeasurably superior to all the students; for aught I know, to all the tutors; for indeed, in any chance observations in which they might indulge, I could even then perceive that they were individuals of limited intelligence. They spoke sometimes of great men, I suppose for our emulation; but their great men were always commentators. They sometimes burst into an eu- logium of a great work ; you might be sure it was ever a huge bunch of annotations. An unrivalled exploit turned out to be a happy conjecture ; a marvellous deed was the lion's skin that covered the ears of a new reading. I was confounded to hear the same epithets applied to their obscure demigods that I associated with the names of Caesar and Socrates, and Pericles, and Cicero. It was perplexing to find that Pharsalia or a Philippic, the groves of Acade- mus or the fanes of the Acropolis, could receive no higher admiration than was lavished upon the unknown exploits of a hunter after syllables. After my battle I was never annoyed by my former friends. As time advanced I slightly relaxed in my behaviour, and when it was necessary we interchanged words ; but I never associated with any one. I was, however, no longer mo- lested. An idea got afloat that I was not exactly in my perfect senses ; and, on the whole, I was rather feared than disliked. Reading was my only resource. I seldom indulged in reverie. The moment that I perceived my mind wandering, I checked it with a mixed feeling of disgust and terror. I made, however, during this period, more than one attempt 44 CONTABINI FLEMING: to write, and always with signal discomfiture. Neither of the projected subjects in any way grew out of my own character, however they might have led to its delineation had I proceeded. The first was a theme of heroic life, in which I wished to indulge in the gorgeousness of remote antiquity. I began with a fine description, which again elevated my hopes, but when the scene was fairly painted my actors would not come on. I flung the sheet into the river, and cursed my repeated idiocy. After an exposure of this kind I always instantaneously became practical, and grave, and stupid ; as a man, when he recovers from intoxication, vows that he will never again taste wine. Nevertheless, during the vacation, a pretty little German lady unfortunately one night took it into her head to narrate some of the traditions of her country. Among these I heard, for the first time, the story of the Wild Huntsman of Rodenstein. It was unlucky. The Baroness, who was a fine instrumental musician, but who would never play when I requested her, chanced this night to be indulging us. The mystery and the music combined their seductive spells, and I was again enchanted. Infinite characters and ideas seemed rushing in my mind. I recol- lected that I had never yet given my vein a trial at home. Here I could command silence, solitude, hours unbroken and undisturbed. I walked up and down the room, once more myself. The music was playful, gay, and joyous. A village dance was before my vision ; I marked with delight the smiling peasantry bounding under the clustering vines, the girls crowned with roses, the youth adorned with flowing ribbons. Just as a venerable elder advanced the sounds became melancholy, wild, and ominous. I was in a deep forest, full of doubt and terror ; the wind moaned, the big branches heaved ; in the distance I heard the baying of a hound. It did not appear, for suddenly the trumpet an- nounced a coming triumph ; I felt that a magnificent A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 45 procession was approaching, that each moment it would appear ; each moment the music became louder, and already an advanced and splendid guard appeared in the distance. I caught a flashing glimpse of a sea of waving plumes and glistening arms. The music ceased, the procession vanished, I fell from the clouds ; I found myself in a dull drawing, room, a silly boy, very exhausted. I felt so excessively stupid that I instantly gave up all thoughts of the Hunter of Rodenstein, and went to bed gloomy and without hope. But in the morning, when I rose, the sun was shining so softly, the misty trees and the dewy grass were so tender and so bright, the air was so fresh and fragrant, that my first feeling was the desire of composition, and I walked forth into the park cheerful, and moved by a rising faith. The exciting feelings of the evening seemed to return, and, when I had sufficiently warmed my mind with reverie, I sat down to my table surrounded by every literary luxury that I could remember. Ink enclosed in an ormulu Cupid, clear and brilliant, quires of the softest cream-coloured paper, richly gilt, and a perfect magazine of the finest pens. I was exceedingly nervous, but on the whole not unsuc- cessful. I described a young traveller arriving at night at a small inn on the borders of a Bohemian forest. I did not allow a single portion of his dress to escape, and even his steed and saddle-bags duly figured. The hostess was founded on our housekeeper, therefore I was master of my subject. From her ear-rings to her shoe-buckles all was perfect. I managed to supply my hero with a supper, and at length I got him, not to bed, but to his bed-room, for heroes do not get into bed, even when wearied, with the expedition of more commonplace characters. On the con- trary, he first opened the window (it was a lattice-window) and looked at the moon. I had a fine moonlight scene. I well remember that the trees were tipped with silver, but 46 CONTAEINI FLEMING: oh ! triumph of art, for the first time in my life I achieved a simile, and the evening breeze came sounding in his ear soft as a lover's sigh ! This last master-touch was too much for me. Breathless, and indeed exhausted, I read over the chapter. I could scarcely believe its existence possible. I rushed into the park, and hurried to some solitude where, undisturbed by the sight of a Tin-man being, I could enjoy my intense existence. I was so agitated, I was in such a tumult of felicity, that for the rest of the day I could not even think. I could not find even time to determine on my hero's name, or to ascer- tain the reason for which I had brought him to such a wild scene, and placed him in such exceedingly uncomfort- able lodgings. The next morning I had recovered my self-possession. Calm and critical, I reviewed the warm product of my brain which had the preceding day so fasci- nated me. It appeared to me that it had never been my unfortunate fate to read more crude, rugged, silly stuff in the whole course of my experience. The description of costume, which I had considered so perfect, sounded like a catalogue of old clothes. As for the supper, it was evident that so lifeless a personage could never have an appetite. What he opened the window for I know not; but certainly, if only to look at the moon he must have been disappointed, for in spite of all my asseverations, it was very dim indeed ; and as for the lover's sigh, at the same time so tame and so forced, it was absolutely sickening. I threw away the wretched effusion ; the beautiful ink- stand, the cream-coloured paper, the fine pens, away they were all crammed in a drawer, which I was ever after ashamed to open. I looked out of the window, and saw the huntsman going out. I called to him, and joined him. I hated field-sports, indeed every bodily exertion, except riding, which is scarcely one; but now anything that A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 47 was bodily, that was practical, pleased, and I was soon slaughtering birds in the very bowers in which I had loved Egeria. On the whole, this was a miserable and wretched year. I was almost always depressed, often felt heart-broken. I entirely lost any confidence in my own energies, and while I was deprived of the sources of pleasure which I had been used to derive from reverie, I could acquire no new ones in the pursuits of those around me. It was in this state of mind that, after a long and solitary walk, I found myself at a village which I had never before visited. On the skirts was a small Gothic building, beau- tiful and ancient. It was evening. The building was illu- minated ; the door open. I entered, and found myself in a Catholic church. A Lutheran in a Lutheran country, for a moment I trembled ; but the indifference of my father on the subject of religion had prevented me at least from being educated a bigot ; and, in my Venetian meditations, I would sometimes recollect that my mother must have professed the old faith. The church was not very full ; groups were kneeling in several parts. All was dusk except at the high altar. There, a priest in a flaming vest officiated, and ever and anon a kneeling boy, in a scarlet dress, rang a small and musical silver bell. Many tall white candles, in golden sticks, illuminated the sacred table, redolent of perfumes and adorned with flowers. Six large burnished lamps were suspended above, and threw a magical light upon a magical picture. It was a Magdalen kneeling and weeping in a garden. Her long golden hair was drawn off her ivory forehead, and reached to the ground. Her large blue eyes, full of ecstatic melancholy, pierced to heaven, while the heavy tears studded like pearls her wan but delicate cheek. Her clasped hands embraced a crucifix. I gazed upon this pictured form with a strange fasci- 48 CONTAKINI FLEMING: nation. I came forward, and placed myself near the altar. At that moment the organ burst forth, as if heaven were opening ; clouds of incense rose and wreathed around the rich and vaulted roof; the priest advanced, and revealed a God, which I fell down and worshipped. From that moment I became a Catholic. CHAPTER THERE was a mystery in the secret creed full of delight. Another link, too, seemed broken in the chain that bound me to the country which each day I more detested. Adora- tion also was ever a resource teeming with rapture, for a creed is imagination. The Magdalen succeeded to Chris- tiana and to Egeria. Each year my mistress seemed to grow more spiritual, first reality, then far now pure spirit : a beautiful woman, a mystical nympJ ionised soul. How was this to end ? Perhaps I \\ ultimately designed for angelic intercourse, perhaps I laight mount the skies with the presiding essence of a star. My great occupations were devout meditation and solitary prayer. I inflicted upon myself many penances. I scru- pulously observed every fast. My creative power was exercised in the production of celestial visitants ; my thirst for expression gratified in infinite invocation. Wherever I moved I perceived the flashing of a white wing, the streaming of radiant hair ; however I might apparently be employed, I was,' in fact, pondering over the music of my next supplication. One mundane desire alone mingled with these celestial aspirations, and in a degree sprang out of their indulgence. Each day I languished more for Italy. It was a strong longing. Nothing but the liveliness of my faith could have solaced and supported me under the want of its A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 49 gratification. I pined for the land where the true religion flourished in becoming glory, the land where I should be- hold temples worthy of the beautiful mysteries which were celebrated within their sumptuous walls, the land which the Vicar of God and the Ruler of Kings honoured and sanctified by his everlasting presence. A pilgrimage to Rome occupied my thoughts. My favourite retreat now, when at the college, was to the ruins of a Gothic abbey, whither an hour's stroll easily carried me. It pleased me much to sit among these beau- tiful relics, and call back the days when their sanctity was undefiled, and their loveliness unimpaired. As I looked upon the rich framework of the eastern window, my fancy lent perfection to its shattered splendour. I beheld it once more beaming with its saints and martyrs, and radiant with ohivalric blazonry. My eye wandered down the moulder- ing cloisters. I pictured a procession of priests solemnly advancing to the high altar, and blending in sacred melody, with their dark garments and their shining heads, elevating a golden and gigantic crosier, and waving on high a standard of Madonna. One day as I was indulging in these soothing visions I heard a shout, and looking round, I observed a man seated at no great distance, who by his action had evidently called to me. I arose, and coming out of the ruins ad- vanced to him. He was seated on a mass of ancient brick- work, and appeared to be sketching. He was a tall man, fair and blue-eyed, but sun-burnt. He was hawk-nosed, with a quick glancing vision, and there was an air of acute- ness in his countenance which was striking. His dress was not the dress of our country, but I was particularly pleased with his cap, which was of crimson cloth, with a broad border of fur, and fell on one side of his head like a cap in a picture. ' My little man,' said he, in a brisk clear voice, ' I am 50 CONTAEINI FLEMING: sorry to disturb you, but as probably you know this place better than I, you can, perhaps, tell me whether there be a spring at hand.' 'Irideed, sir, a famous one, for I have often drunk its water, which is most sweet, and clear, and cold; and if you will permit me, I will lead you to it.' ' With all my heart, and many thanks, my little friend.' So saying, he rose, and placing his portfolio under one arm, lifted up a knapsack, which I offered to carry. 'By no means, kind sir,' said he in a cheerful voice, 'I am ever my own servant.' So leading him on round the other side of the abbey, and thence through a small but fragrant mead, I brought him to the spring of which I had spoken. Over it was built a small but fair arch, the key-stone being formed of a mitred escutcheon, and many parts covered with thick ivy. The eye of the stranger kindled with pleasure when he looked upon the arch ; and then, sitting down upon the bank and opening his knapsack, he took out a large loaf and broke it, and as I was retiring he said, ' Prithee do not go, my little friend, but stop and share my meal. It is rough, but there is plenty. Nay, refuse not, little gentle- man, for I wish to prolong our acquaintance. In not more than as many minutes you have conferred upon me two favours. In this world such characters are rare. Tou have given me that which I love better than wine, and you have furnished me with a divine sketch, for indeed this arch is of a finer style than any part of the great building, and must have been erected by an abbot of grand taste, I warrant you. Come, little gentleman, eat, prithee eat.' ' Indeed, sir, I am not hungry ; but if you would let me look at your drawing of the abbey, I should be delighted.' ' What, dost love art ? What ! have I stumbled upon a little artist ! ' A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 51 ' No, sir, I cannot draw, nor indeed do I understand art, but I love everything which is beautiful.' ' Ah ! a comprehensive taste,' and he gave me the port- folio. ' Oh ! ' I exclaimed, ' how beautiful ! ' for the drawing turned out, not as I had anticipated, a lean skeleton pencil sketch, but one rapidly and richly coloured. The abbey rose as in reality, only more beautiful, being suffused with a warm light, for he had dashed in it a sunset full of sentiment. ' Oh ! sir, how beautiful ! I could look at it for ever. It seems to me that some one must come forth from the pass of those blue mountains. Cannot you fancy some bright cavalier, sir, with a flowing plume, or even a string of mules, even that would be delicious ? ' ' Bravo ! bravo ! my little man,' exclaimed the stranger shooting a sharp scrutinising side glance. ' You deserve to see sketches. There ! undo that strap and open the folio, for there are many others, and some which may please you more.' I opened it as if I were about to enter a sanctuary. It was very full. I culled a drawing which appeared the most richly coloured, as one picks the most glowing fruit. There seemed a river, and many marble palaces on each side, and long, thin, gliding boats shooting in every part, and over the stream there sprang a bridge, a bridge with a single arch, an ancient and solemn bridge, covered with buildings. I gazed upon the scene for a moment with breathless interest, a tear of agitating pleasure stole down my cheek, and then I shouted, ' Venice ! Venice ! ' ' Little man,' said the stranger, ' what is the matter ? ' ' ! sir, I beg your pardon, you must think me very foolish indeed. I am sure I did not mean to call out, but I have been longing all my life to go to Venice, and when I see anything connected with it, I feel, sir, quite agitated. E 2 52 CONTAKINI FLEMING : Your drawing, sir, is so beautiful, that I know not how, I thought for a moment that I was really looking upon these beautiful palaces, and crossing this famous Bialto.' 'Never apologise for showing feeling, my friend. Ee- member that when you do so you apologise for truth. I, too, am fond of Venice ; nor is there any city where I have made more drawings.' ' What, sir, have you been at Venice ? ' * Is that so strange a deed ? I have been in stranger places.' ' sir, how happy you must be ! To see Venice, and to travel in distant countries, I think I could die as the con- dition of such enjoyment.' ' You know as yet too little of life to think of death,' said the stranger. 'Alas, sir,' I mournfully sighed, 'I have often wished to die.' ' But can one so young be unhappy ? ' asked the stranger. ' sir, most, most unhappy. I am alone supported in this world by a fervent persuasion, that the holy Magdalen has condescended to take me under her especial protection.' ' The holy Magdalen ! ' exclaimed the stranger with an air of great astonishment ; ' indeed ! and what made you unhappy before the holy Magdalen condescended to take you under her especial protection ? Do you think, or has anybody told you that you have committed any sin ? ' ' No ! sir, my life has beer., I hope, innocent ; nor do I see indeed, how I could commit any sin, for I have never been subject to any temptation. But I have ever been unhappy, because I am perplexed about myself. I feel that I am not like other persons, and that which makes them happy is to me a source of no enjoyment.' 'But you have, perhaps, some sources of enjoyment which are peculiar to yourself,- and not open to them. Come, tell me how you have passed your life. Indeed, you A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 53 have excited my curiosity ; for I observed to-day, while I was drawing, that you were a good four hours reclining in the same position.' ' Four hours, sir ! I thought that I had been there but a few minutes.' ' Four hours by the sun, as well as by this watch. What were you doing ? Were you thinking of the blessed Magdalen ? ' ' No, sir ! ' I gravely replied, ' not to-day.' ' How then ? ' ' Indeed, sir,' I answered, reddening, ' if I tell you, I am afraid you will think me very foolish.' ' Speak out, little man. We are all very foolish ; and I have a suspicion, that if we understood each other better you might perhaps turn out the least foolish of the two. Open then your mind and fear nothing. For believe me, it is dishonourable to blush when you speak the truth, even if it be to your shame.' There was something in the appearance and manner of the stranger that greatly attracted me. I sought him with the same eagerness with which I always avoided my fellow creatures. From the first, conversation with him was no shock. His presence seemed to sanctify, instead of out- raging my solitude. His voice subdued my sullen spirit, and called out my hidden nature. He inspired me not only with confidence, but even with a degree of fascinating curiosity. ' Indeed, sir,' I began, still with a hesitating voice but a more assured manner, ' indeed, sir, I have never spoken of these things to any one, for I feel they could not believe or comprehend what I would wish to express, nor, indeed, is it delightful to be laughed at. But know that I ever like to be alone, and it is this, that when I am alone, I can indulge in thought, which gives m e great pleasure. For I would wish you to comprehend, sir, that I have ever lived in, as it were, 54 CONTAEINI FLEMING: two worlds, a public world and a private world. But I should not be unhappy in the private world but for one reason, which is nothing, but I was ever most happy ; but in the pub- lic world I am indeed miserable. For you must know, sir, that when I am alone, my mind is full of what seem to me beautiful thoughts ; nor indeed are they thoughts alone that make me so happy, but in truth, I perform many strange and noble acts, and these, too, in distant countries and in unknown places, and other persons appear and they also act. And we all speak in language more beautiful than common words. And, sir, many other things occur which it would take long to recount, but which, indeed, I am sure, that is, I think, would make any one very happy.' ' But all this is a source of happiness, not of unhappiness,' said the stranger. ' Am I to comprehend, then, that the source has dried up ? ' * Oh ! no, sir, for only this morning I had many visions, but I checked them.' ' But why check them ? ' ' Ah ! sir,' I answered, heaving a deep sigh, ' it is this which makes me unhappy, for when I enter into this private world, there arises in the end a desire to express what has taken place in it which indeed I cannot gratify.' The stranger for a moment mused. Then he suddenly said, ' And when you looked upon my sketch of the abbey, there seemed to you a cavalier advancing, I think you said ? ' ' From the pass of the blue mountains, sir. Whenever I look upon pictures it is thus.' ' And when you beheld the Eialto, tell me what occurred then?' ' There was a rush, sir, in my mind ; and when my eye caught that tall young signer, who is stepping off the stairs of a palace into a gondola, I wished to write a tale of which he should be the hero.' A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. ' It appears to me, my young friend,' said the stranger in a serious tone, and looking at me keenly, ' it appears to me, my young friend, that you are a poet.' ' Alas, sir,' I exclaimed, extremely agitated and nearly seizing his hand, ' alas ! alas ! sir, I am not. For I once thought so myself and have often tried to write ; and either I have not produced a line, or something so wretchedly flat and dull that even I have felt it intolerable. It is this that makes me so miserable, so miserable that, were it not for feeling in the most marked manner that I am under the especial protection of the blessed Magdalen, I think I should kill myself.' A gentle smile played upon the lip of the stranger, but it was in an instant suppressed. Then turning to me, he said, ' Supposing a man were born with a predisposition for painting, as I might have been myself, and that he were enabled to fancy pictures in his eye, do you think that if he took up a brush for the first time he could transfer these pictures to the canvass ? ' ' By no means, sir, for the artist must learn his art.' ' And is not a poet an artist, and is not writing an art equally with painting ? Words are but chalk and colour. The painter and the poet must follow the same course. Both must alike study before they execute. Both must alike consult Nature and invent the beautiful. Those who delineate inanimate Nature, and. those who describe her, must equally study her, if they wish to excel in her own- creations ; and for man, if the painter study the outward form of the animal, the in ward must be equally investigated by the poet. Thus far for the natural ; and for the ideal, which is an improvement upon nature, and which you will some day more clearly comprehend, remember this, that the painter and the poet, however assisted by their own organization, must alike perfect their style by the same process, I mean by studying the works themselves of great 56 CONTAKINI FLEMING: painters and great poets. See then, my young friend, how unreasonable you are, that, because you cannot be a great artist without studying your art, you are unhappy.' ' 0, sir, indeed, indeed, I am not ! There is no applica- tion, there is no exertion, I feel, I feel it strongly, of which I am not capable, to gain knowledge. Indeed, sir, you speak to me of great things, and my mind opens to your wisdom, but how am I to study ?' ' Be not too rapid. Before we part, which will be in a moment, I will write you some talismanic rules which have been of great service to myself. I copied them off an obelisk amid the ruins of Thebes. They will teach you all that is now necessary.' ' sir, how good, how kind you are ! How different would have been my life had I been taught by somebody like you.' ' Where, then, were you educated ? ' ' I am a student of the college about two miles off. Per- haps you may have passed it ? ' ' What, the large house upon the hill, where they learn words ? ' said the stranger with a smile. ' Indeed, sir, it is too true. For though it never occurred to me before, I see now why, with an ardent love of know- ledge, I have indeed there gained nothing but an ill name.' ' And now, said the stranger rising, ' I must away, for the sun will in a few minutes sink, and I have to reach a village, which is some miles off, for my night's encamp- ment.' With a feeling of deep regret I beheld him prepare to depart. I dropped for a moment into profound abstraction ; then, rushing to him, I seized his hand, and exclaimed, 0, sir, I am noble, and I am rich, yet let me follow you ! ' ' By no means,' said the stranger, good-naturedly, ' for our professions are different.' ' Yet a poet should see all things.' A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 57 * Assuredly. And you, too, will wander, but your hour is not yet come.' ' And shall I ever see Venice ? ' ' I doubt not ; for when a mind like yours thinks often of a thing, it will happen.' ' You speak to me of mysteries.' ' There is little mystery ; there is much ignorance. Some day you will study metaphysics, and you will then under- stand the nature of volition.' He opened his knapsack and took out two small volumes, in one of which he wrote some lines. ' This is the only book,' he said, 'I have with me, and as, like myself, you are such a strong Venetian, I will give it you, because you love art, and artists, and are a good boy. When we meet again I hope I may call you a great man. ' Here,' he said, giving them to me, ' they are full of Venice. Here, you see, is a view of the Bialto. This will delight you. And in the blank leaf I have written all the advice you at present require. Promise me, however, not to read it till you return to your college. And so farewell, my little man, farewell ! ' He extended me his hand. I took it ; and although it is an awkward thing at all times, and chiefly for a boy, I began telling him my name and condition, but he checked me. ' I never wish to know anybody's name. Were I to become acquainted with every being who flits across me in life, the callousness of my heart would be endangered. If your acquaintance be worth preserving, fate or fortune will some day bring us again together.' He departed. I watched his figure until it melted in the rising haze of evening. It was strange the ascendancy that this man exercised over me. When he spoke I seemed listening to an oracle, and now that he had departed, I felt as if some supernatural visitant had disappeared. I quickened my walk home from the intense anxiety to 58 CONTAKINI FLEMING: open the volume in which I was to find the talismanic counsel. When I had arrived, I read written in pencil these words : ' BE PATIENT : CHERISH HOPE. READ MORE : PONDER LESS. NATURE is MORE POWERFUL THAN EDUCATION : TIME WILL DE- VELOP EVERY THING. TRUST NOT OVERMUCH IN THE BLESSED MAGDALEN : LEARN TO PROTECT YOURSELF.' CHAPTER XIV. INDEED I could think of nothing but the stranger. All night his image was before my eyes, and his voice sounded in my ear. I recalled each look, I repeated each expres- sion. When I woke in the morning, the first thing I did was to pronounce from memory his oracular advice. I determined to be patient; I resolved never to despair. Reverie was no longer to be endured, and a book was to be ever in my hand. He had himself enabled me to comply with this last rule. I seized the first opportunity to examine his present. It was the History of Venice, in French, by Amelot de la Houssaye ; a real history of Venice, not one written years after the extinction of the Republic by some solemn sage, full of first principles and dull dissertations upon the vicious constitution, a prophet of the past, trying to shuffle off his commonplace deductions for authentic inspi- ration, but a history of Venice written by one who had witnessed the Doge sitting on his golden throne, and receiving awestruck ambassadors in his painted halls. I read it with an avidity with which I had never devoured any book ; some parts of it, indeed, with absolute rapture. When I came to the chapter upon the nobility, a dimness came over my sight : for a moment I could not proceed. A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 59 I saw them all ; I marked all the divisions ; the great magnificoes, who ranked with crowned heads, the nobles of the war of Candia, and the third and still inferior class. I was so excited, that for a moment I did not observe that the name of Contarini did not appear. I looked for it with anxiety. But when I read that there were yet four families of such pre-eminent ancestry that they were placed even above the magnificoes, being reputed descendants of Roman Consular houses, and that of these the unrivalled race of Contarini was the chief, I dashed down the book in a paroxysm of nervous exultation, and rushed into the woods. I ran about like a madman for some time, cutting down with a sharp stick the underwood that opposed my way, leaping trenches, hallooing, spouting, shouting, dashing through pools of water. At length I arrived at a more open part of the wood. At a slight distance was a hill. I rushed on up the hill, and never stopped till I had gained the summit. That steep ascent a little tamed me. I found myself upon a great ridge, and a vast savage view opened upon all sides. I felt now more at ease, for the extent of the prospect harmonised with the largeness and swell of my soul. ' Ha ha ! ' I cried like a wild horse. I snorted in the air, my eye sparkled, my crest rose. I waved my proud arm. ' Ha ha ! have I found it out at last ? I knew there was something. Nature whispered it to me, and time has revealed it. He said truly, time has developed everything. But shall these feelings subside into poetry ? Away ! give me a sword. My consular blood demands a sword. Give me a sword, ye winds, ye trees, ye mighty hills, ye deep cold waters, give me a sword. I will fight ! by heavens, I will fight. I will conquer. Why am I not a Doge ? A curse upon the tyranny of man, why is our Venice not free ? By the God of heaven I will be a Doge ! O, thou fair and melancholy saint ! ' I continued, falling on my knees, ' who 60 CONTAKINI FLEMING: in thy infinite goodness condescendedst, as it were, to come down from heaven to call me back to the true and holy faith of Venice, and to take me under thy especial protec- tion, blessed and beautiful Mary Magdalen, look down from thy glorious seat above, and smile upon thy elected and favourite child ! ' I rose up refreshed by this short prayer, calmer and cooler, and began to meditate upon what was now fitting to be done. That Contarini Fleming must with all possible despatch cease to be a schoolboy was indeed evident, neces- sary, and indispensable. The very idea of the great house upon the hill, where they teach words, was ludicrous. Nor, indeed, would it become me ever again, under any pretence whatever, to acknowledge a master, or, as it would appear, to be subject to any laws, save the old laws of Venice, for I claimed for myself the rights and attributes of a Venetian noble of the highest class, and they were those pertaining to blood royal. But when I called to my recollection the cold, worldly, practical character of my father, the vast quantity of dull, lowering, entangling ties that formed the great domestic mesh, and bound me to a country which I detested, covered me with a climate which killed me, surrounded me with manners with which I could not sympathise, and duties which Nature impelled me not to fulfil ; I felt that, to ensure my emancipation, it was necessary at once to dissolve all ties of blood and affection, and to break away from those links which chained me as a citizen to a country which I abhorred. I resolved, therefore, immediately to set out for Venice. I was for the moment, I conceived, sufficiently well supplied with money, for I possessed one hundred rix- dollars, more than any five of my fellow- students toge- ther. This, with careful husbandry, I counted would carry me to the nearest sea-port, perhaps even secure me a passage. And for the rest, I had a lively conviction that A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 61 something must always turn up to assist me in any difficul- ties, for I was convinced that I was a hero, and heroes are never long forlorn. On the next morning, therefore, long ere the sun had risen, I commenced my adventures. I did not steal away. First I kissed a cross three times which I carried next to my breast, and then recommending myself to the blessed Magdalen, I walked off proudly and slowly, in a manner becoming Coriolanus or Cassar, who, after some removes., were both of them, for aught I knew, my great-grand- fathers. I carried in a knapsack, which we used for our rambles, a few shirts, my money, a pair of pocket pistols, and some ammunition. Nor did I forget a loaf of bread ; not very heroic food, but classical in my sight, from being the victual of the mysterious stranger. Like Mm, also, I determined in future only to drink water. CHAPTER XV. I JOURNEYED for some hours without stopping, along a road about which all I knew was, that it was opposite to the one which had first carried me to the college, and consequently, I supposed, did not lead home. I never was so delighted in my life. I had never been up so early in my life. It was like living in a new world. Everything was still, fresh, fragrant. I wondered how long it would last, how long it would be before the vulgar day, to which I had been used, would begin. At last a soft luminous appear- ance commenced in the horizon, and gradually gathered in strength and brightness. Then it shivered into brilliant streaks, the clouds were dappled with rich flaming tints, and the sun rose. I felt grateful when his mild but vivifying warmth fell upon my face, and it seemed to me 62 CONTAEINI FLEMING: that I heard the sound of trumpets when he came forth, like a royal hero, out of his pavilion. All the birds began singing, and the cocks crowed with reneWed pride. I felt as if I myself could sing, my heart was so full of joy and exultation. And now I heard many pleasant rural sounds. A horse neighed, and a whip smacked ; there was a whistle, and the sound of a cart wheel. I came to a large farm-house. I felt as if I were indeed travelling, and Seeing the world and its wonders. When I had rambled about before I had never observed anything, for I was full of nonsensical ideas. But now I was a practical man, and felt capable, as the stranger said, of protecting myself. Never was I so cheerful. There was a great barking, and several dogs rushed out at me, all very fierce, but I hit the largest over the nose with my stick, and it retreated yelping into the yard, where it again barked most furiously behind the gate ; the smaller dogs were so frightened that they slunk away immediately, through different hedges, nor did they bark again till I passed the gate, but I heard them then, though very feeble, and rather snappish than fierce. The farmer was coming out of the gate, and saluted me. I returned him the salute with a firm voice and a manly air. He spoke then of the weather, and I differed from him, to show that I was a thinking being, and capable of protecting myself. I made some inquiries respecting the distance of certain places, and I acquired from him much information. The nearest town was fifteen miles off. This I wished to reach by night, as there was no great village, and this I doubted not to do. "When the heat increased, and I felt a little fatigued, I stopped at a beautiful spring, and taking my loaf out of my knapsack like the stranger, I ate with a keen relish, and slaked my slight thirst in the running water. It was the coldest and the purest water that I had ever tasted. I felt A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 63 quite happy, and was full of confidence and self-gratulation at my prosperous progress. I reposed here till noon, and as the day, though near midsummer, became cloudy, I then recommenced my journey without dread of the heat. On I went, full of hope. The remembrance of the cut that I had given the great dog over the nose had wonder- fully inflamed my courage. I longed to knock down a man. Every step was charming. Every flower, every tree, gave me delight, which they had not before yielded. Sometimes, yet seldom, for it was an unfrequented road, I met a traveller, and always prepared myself for an adven- ture. It did not come, but there was yet time. Every person I saw, and every place I observed, seemed strange and new : I felt in a far land. And for adventures, my own consciousness was surely a sufficient one, for was I not a nobleman incognito, going on a pilgrimage to Venice ? To say nothing of the adventures that might then occur ; here were materials for the novelist! Pah! my accursed fancy was again wandering. I forgot that I was no longer a poet, but something which, though difficult to ascertain, I doubted not in the end all would agree to be infinitely greater. As the afternoon advanced the thin grey clouds melted away, the sun mildly shone in the warm light blue sky. This was again fortunate, and instead of losing my gay heart with the decline of day, I felt inspired with fresh vigour, and shot on joyous and full of cheerfulness. The road now ran through the skirts of a forest. It was still less like a common-place journey. On each side was a large plot of turf, green and sweet. Seated on this, at some little distance, I perceived a group of men and women. My heart beat at the prospect of an incident. I soon observed them with more advantage. Two young women were seated together repairing a bright garment, which greatly excited my wonder. It seemed of very fine stuff, and 64 CONTAKINI FLEMING: richly embroidered with, gold and silver. Greatly it con- trasted with their own attire and that of their companions, which was plain and, indeed, shabby. As they worked one of them burst into repeated fits of laughter, but the other was more sedulous, and, looking grave, seemed to reprove her. A man was feeding with sticks a fire, over which boiled a great pot ; a middle-aged woman was stirring its contents. A young man was lying asleep upon the grass ; an older one was furbishing up a sword. A lightly built but large waggon was on the other side of the road, the unharnessed horses feeding on the grass. A little dog shrilly barked when I came up, but I was not afraid of dogs ; I flourished my stick, and the laughing girl called out ' Harlequin,' and the cur ran to her. I stopped and enquired of the fire-lighter the distance to the town where I hoped to sleep. Not only did he not answer me, but he did not even raise up his head. It was the first time in my life that I had not obtained an answer. I was astonished at his insolence. ' Sir,' I said, in a tone of offended dignity, ' how long is it since you have learnt not to answer the inquiry of a gentleman ? ' The laughing girl burst into a renewed fit. All stopped their pursuits. The fire-lighter looked up with a puzzled sour face, the old woman stared with her mouth open, and the furbisher ran up to us with his naked weapon. He had the oddest and most comical face that I had ever seen. It was like that of a seal, but full of ludicrous mobility. He came rushing up, saying with an air and voice of mock heroism, ' To arms, to arms ! ' I was astonished, and caught the eye of the laughing girl. She was very fair, with a small nose, and round cheeks breaking into charming dimples. When I caught her eye she made a wild grimace atone, and I also laughed. Although I was trudging along with a knapsack my dress did not befit my assumed character, and, in a moment of A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 65 surprise, I had given way to a manner which still less became my situation. Women are quicker than men in judging of strangers. The two girls were evidently my friends from the first, and the fair laugher beckoned me to come and sit down by her. This gay wench had wonder- fully touched my fancy. I complied with her courteous offer without hesitation. I threw away my knapsack and my stick, and stretched my legs with the air of a fine gentleman. I was already ashamed of my appearance, and forgot everything in the desire to figure to the best advantage to my new friend. ' This is the first time,' I drawled out with a languid air, and looking in her face, ' this is the first time in my life that I ever walked, and I am heartily sick of it.' ' And why have you walked, and where have you come from, and where are you going to ? ' she eagerly demanded. ' I was tired to death of riding every day of my life,' I rejoined, with the tone of a man who had exhausted pleasure. ' I am not going anywhere, and I forget where I came from.' ' Oh, you odd thing ! ' said the wench, and she gave me a pinch. The other girl, who was handsome, but dark, and of a more serious beauty, at this moment rose, and went and spoke to the crusty fire-lighter. When she returned she seated herself on my other side ; so I was now between the two : but as she seated herself, though, doubtless uncon- sciously, she pressed my hand in a sentimental manner. ' And what is your name ? ' asked the laughing girl. ' Theodora ! how can you be so rude ? ' remarked the serious beauty. ' Do you know,' said the laughing girl, whispering in my ear, ' I tMnk you must be a little count.' I only smiled in answer, but it was a smile which com- plimented her penetration. 66 cosTAnm FLEMING : ' And now may I ask who you may be, and whither you may be going ? ' 'We are going to the next town,' replied the serious beauty, ' where, if we find the public taste not disinclined, we hope to entertain them with some representations.' ' You are actors then. What a charming profession ! How I love the theatre ! When I am at home I go in my father's box every night. I have often wished to be an actor.' ' Be one,' said the serious beauty, pressing my hand. ' Join us,' said the laughing girl, pinching my elbow. 'Why not?' I replied, and almost thought. 'Youth must be passed in adventure.' The fair nymph produced a box of sugar-plums, and taking out a white almond, kissed it, and pushed it into my mouth. While I laughed at her wild kitten-like action, the dark girl drew a deep-coloured rose from her bosom, and pressed it to my nose. I was nearly stifled with their joint sweets and kindness. Neither of them would take away their hands. The dark girl pressed her rose with increased force ; the sugar- plum melted away ; but I found in my mouth the tip of a little finger scarcely larger, and as white and sweet. There was giggling without end ; I sank down upon my back. The dark girl snatched a hasty embrace ; her companion fell down by my side, and bit my cheek. ' You funny little count ! ' said the fair beauty. ' I shall keep these in remembrance of a happy moment,' said her friend, with a sentimental air ; and she glanced at me with her flashing eye. So saying, she picked up the scattered leaves of the rose. ' And I ! am I to have nothing ? ' exclaimed the blue-eyed girl, with an air of mock sadness ; and she crossed her arms upon her lap with a drooping head. I took a light iron chain from my neck, and threw it over hers. ' There,' I said, ' Miss Sugar-plum, that is for you.' A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 67 She jumped up from the ground, and bounded about as if she were the happiest of creatures, laughing without end, and kissing the slight gift. The dark girl rose and began to dance, full of grace and expression ; Sugar-plum joined her, and they fell into one of their stage figures. The serious beauty strove to excel, and indeed was the greater artist of the two ; but there was a wild grace about her companion which pleased me most. ' Can you dance, little count ? ' she cried. ' I am too tired,' I answered. ' Nay, then, another day ; for it is pleasant to look forward to frolic.' The man with the odd face now advanced towards me. He fell into ridiculous attitudes. I thought that he would never have finished his multiplied reverences. Every time he bowed he saluted me with a new form of visage ; it was the most ludicrous medley of pomposity, and awkwardness, and humour. I thought that I had never seen such a droll person, and was myself a little impregnated with his oddity. 1 also made him a bow with assumed dignity, and then he became more subdued. ' Sir,' said he, placing his huge hand upon his breast, and bowing nearly to the ground ; ' I assure you, sir, indeed, sir, the greatest honour, sir, your company ; a very great honour indeed.' ' I am equally sensible of the honour,' I replied, ' and think myself most fortunate to have found so many and such agreeable friends.' ' The greatest honour indeed, sir ; very sensible, sir ; always sensible, sir.' He stopped, and I again returned his reverence, but this time without speaking. ' The greatest liberty, sir ; never take liberties ; but fear you will consider it a very great liberty ; a very great liberty indeed, sir.' F 2 G8 CONTARINI FLEMING : ' Indeed I sliall consider myself very fortunate to comply with any wish that you can express.' ' Oh, sir, you are too kind ! always are kind, have no doubt ; no doubt at all, sir ; but our meal, sir, our humble meal, very humble indeed ; we venture to request the honour, your company, sir;' and he pronounced the last and often-repeated monosyllable with a renewed reverence. ' Indeed I fear that I have already too much and too long intruded.' ' Oh come ! pray come ! ' and each girl seized an arm, and led me to their banquet. I sat down between my two friends. The fire-lighter, who was the manager, and indeed proprietor of the whole concern, now received me with courtesy. When they were all seated, they called several times, ' Frederick ! Frederick ! ' and then the young man who was on the ground jumped up and seated himself. He was not ill-looking, but I did not like the expression of his face. His countenance and his manner seemed to me vulgar. I took rather a prejudice against him. Nor, indeed, did my appearance seem much to please him, for he stared at me not very courteously ; ;ind when the manager mentioned that I wasa young gen- tleman travelling, who had done them the honour to join their repast, he said nothing. The repast was not very humble. There was plenty to eat. While the manager helped the soup they sat quiet and demure ; perhaps my presence slightly restrained them ; even the laughing girl was for a moment calm. I had a keen appetite, and, though I at first from shame restrained it, I played my part well. The droll carved a great joint of boiled meat. I thought I should have died ; he seldom spoke, but his look made us all full of merri- ment ; even the young man sometimes smiled. ' We prefer living in this way to sojourning in dirty inns,' said the manager, with an air of dignity. A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMAXCE. 6'J ' You are quite right,' I replied ; ' I desire nothing better than to live always so.' ' Inns are indeed wretched things,' said the old mother. ' How extravagantly they charge for what costs them in a manner nothing ! ' Wine was now produced. The manager filled a cup and handed it to me. I was just going to observe that I drank only water, when Sugar-plum, first touching it with her lips, placed it in my hand, and, pledging them all, I drank it off 1 . ' You are eating rough fare,' said the old mother ; ' but you are welcome.' ' I never enjoyed anything so much in my life,' I truly replied. ' How I envy you all the happy life you lead ! ' ' Before you style it happy you should have experienced it,' remarked Frederick. ' What you say is in part true ; but if a person have ima- gination, experience appears to me of little use, since both are means by which we can equally arrive at knowledge.' ' I know nothing about imagination,' said the young man ; ' but what I know I owe to experience. It may not have taught me as much as imagination has taught you.' ' Experience is everything,' said the old mother, shaking her head. ' It sometimes costs dear,' said the manager. ' Terrible, terrible,' observed the droll, with a most sad and solemn shake of the head, and lifting up his hands. I burst into a fit of laughter, and poured down another draught of wine. Conversation now became more brisk, and I took more than my share of it ; but I being new, they all wished me to talk. I got very much excited by my elocution, as well as by the wine. I discoursed upon acting, which I pro- nounced to be one of the first and finest of arts. I treated this subject, indeed, deeply, and in a spirit of aesthe- 70 CONTAEINI FLEMING: tical criticism with which, they seemed unacquainted, and a little surprised. ' Should we place it,' I asked, ' before painting ? ' 'Before scene-painting certainly,' said the droll, in a hoarse, thick voice ; ' for it naturally takes its place there.' ' I never knew but one painter,' said the old mother, ' and therefore I cannot give an opinion.' The manager was quite silent. ' All employments are equally disgusting,' said the young man. 'On further reflection,' I continued, 'it appears to me that if we examine ' But here the white girl pinched me so severely under the table that I could not contain myself, and I was obliged to call out. All stared, and she looked quite demure, as if nothing bad happened. After this all was' merriment, fun, and frolic. The girls pelted the droll with plums, and he unfurled an umbrella to protect himself. I assisted them in the attack. The young man lighted his pipe and walked off. The old mother in vain proclaimed silence. I had taken too much wine, and for the first time in my life. All of a sudden I felt the trees dancing and whirling round. I took another bumper to set myself right. In a few minutes I fell down quite flat, and remember nothing: more. CHAPTER XYI. I MUST get out. I am so hot.' ' You shall not,' said Thalia. ' I must, I must. I am so very hot.' ' Will you desert me ! ' exclaimed Melpomene. ' Oh ! how hot I am. Pray let me out.' ' No one can get out at night,' said the dark girl earn- A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 71 estly, and in a significant voice, which intimated to her companion to take up the parable. ' No, indeed,' said her friend. ' Why not ? ' I asked. ' Because it is a rule. The manager -will not permit it.' ' Confound the manager ! What is he to me ? I will get out.' ' Oh ! what a regular little count,' said Thalia. ' Let me out, let me out. I never was so hot in my life.' 1 Hush ! hush ! or you will wake them.' ' If you do not let me out I will scream.' The manager and the droll were in the fore part of the wagon affecting to drive, but they were both asleep. The old mother was snoring behind them. They had put me in the back part of the wagon with my two friends. ' Let him out, Theodora,' for the other was afraid of a contention. ' Never,' said Theodora, and she embraced me with in- creased energy. My legs were in the other girl's lap. I began to kick and struggle. ' Oh ! you naughty little count,' said one. ' Is this the return for all our love ? ' exclaimed the other. ' I will get out, and there is an end* of it. I must have some air. I must stretch my legs. Let me out at once, or I will wake them all.' ' Let him out, Theodora.' ' He is certainly the wickedest little count ; but promise you will come back in five minutes.' 'Anything, I will promise anything: only let me out.' They unbolted the back of the wagon ; the fresh air came in. They shivered, but I felt it delightful. ' Farewell, dearest,' exclaimed Melpomene, ' one parting embrace. How heavily will the moments roll until we again meet ! ' 72 CONTAKINI FLEMING: ' Adieu, count,' said Thalia ; ' and remember you are to come back in five minutes.' I jumped into tlie road. It was a clear, sharp night, the stars shining brightly. The young man was walking behind, wrapped up in a great cloak, and smoking his pipe. He came up and, with more courtesy than he had hitherto shown, assisted me in shutting the door and asked if I would try a cigar. I declined his offer, and for some little way we walked on in silence. I felt unwell ; my head ached ; my mouth was parched. I was conscious that I had exposed myself. I had commenced the morning by vowing that I would only drink water, and for the first time in my life I had got tipsy with wine. I had committed many other follies, and altogether felt much less like a hero. I recalled all my petty vanity and childish weaknesses with remorse. Imagination was certainly not such a sure guide as expe- rience. Was it possible that one, who had already got into such scrapes, could really achieve his great purpose ? My conduct and my situation were assuredly neither of them Roman. As I walked on the fresh air did its kind office. My head was revived by my improved circulation, my companion furnished me with an excellent draught of water. Hope did not quite desert my invigorated frame. I began to turn in my mind how I might yet prosper. * I feel better,' I said to my companion, with a feeling of gratitude. 'Ay ! ay ! that wagon is enough to make any one ill, at least any one accustomed to a more decent conveyance. I never enter it. To say nothing of their wine, which is indeed intolerable to those who may have tasted a fair glass in the course of this sad life.' ' You find life, then, sad ? ' I inquired with a mixed feel- ing of curiosity and pympathy. A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 73 ' He who knows life will hardly style it joyous.' 'Ah, ah ! ' I thought to myself, ' here is some chance of philosophical conversation. Perhaps I have found another stranger, who can assist me in self-knowledge.' 1 began to think that I was exceedingly wrong in entertaining a prejudice against this young man ; and in a few minutes I had settled that his sullen conduct was the mark of a superior mind, and that he himself must be an interesting personage. ' I have found life very gloomy myself,' I rejoined ; 'but I think it arises from our faulty education. We are taught words and not ideas.' ' There is something in that,' said the young man thoughtfully. 'After all, perhaps, it is best to be patient, and cherish hope.' ' Doubtless,' said the young man. ' And I think it equally true, that we should read more and ponder less.' ' Oh ! curse reading,' said my friend ; ' I never could read.' 'You have like myself, then, indulged in your own thoughts ? ' ' Always,' he affirmed. ' Ah ! indeed, my dear friend, there is after all nothing like it. Let them say what they will, but give me the glorious pleasures of my private world, and all the jarring horrors of a public one I leave without regret to those more fitted to struggle with them.' ' I believe that most public men are scoundrels,' said the young man. 'It is their education,' I rejoined, although I did not clearly detect the connexion of his remark. ' What can we expect ? ' ' No, sir, it is corruption,' he replied, in a firm tone. 74 CONTAEINI FLEMING : ' Pray,' said I, leading back the conversation to a point which. I more fully comprehended, ' is it your opinion that nature is stronger than education ? ' ' Why,' said my friend, taking a good many whiffs of his pipe, ' there is a great deal to be said on both sides.' * One of the wisest and most extraordinary men I ever knew, however, was of a decided opinion that nature would ultimately prevail.' ' Who might he be ? ' asked my companion. ' Why really his name ; but it is a most extraordinary adventure, and to this hour I cannot help half believing that he was a supernatural being; but the truth is I do not know his name, for I met him casually and under peculiar circumstances ; and though we conversed much, and of very high matters, he did not, unfortunately, favour me with his name.' ' That certainly looks odd,' said Mr. Frederick ; ' for when a man sheers off without giving his name, I, for one, never think him better than he should be.' ' Had he not spoken of the blessed Magdalen in a way which I can scarcely reconcile with his other sentiments, I should certainly have considered him a messenger from that holy personage, for I have the best reasons for believ- ing that I am under her especial protection.' 'If he abused her, that could scarcely be,' remarked Frederick. ' No. Certainly I think he must have been only a man ; for he presented me with a gift before his departure ' ' That was handsome.' ' And I can hardly believe that he was really deputed, though I really do not know. Everything seems mysterious ; although I believe, after all, there is little mystery, but, on the contrary, much ignorance.' ' No doubt : though they are opening schools now in every parish.' A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 75 ' And how much did he give you ? ' continued Frederick. ' How much ! I do not understand you.' ' I mean, what did he give you ? ' ' A most delightful book, to me particularly interesting.' ' A book ! ' ' A book which I shall no doubt find of great use in my travels.' ' I have myself some thoughts of travelling,' said Fred- erick ; ' for I am sick of this life, which is ill-suited to my former habits, but one gets into scrapes without thinking of it.' ' One does in a most surprising manner.' I never made an observation in a tone of greater sincerity. ' You have led a different sort of life then ? ' I asked. 'To tell you the truth, I thought so. You could not disguise from me that you were superior to your appear- ance. I suppose, like myself, you are incog. ? ' ' That is the exact truth.' ' Good heavens ! how lucky it is that we have met ! Do not you think that we could contrive to travel together ? What are your plans ? ' ' Why, to say truth, I care little where I go. It is ne- cessary that I should travel about for some time, and see the world, until my father, the count, is reconciled.' ' You have quarrelled with your father? ' ' Do not speak of it. It is a sad affair. But I hope that it will end well. Time will show.' ' Time, indeed, develops everything.' ' I hope everything from my mother the countess' influ- ence ; but I cannot bear speaking about it. I am supported now by my sister Lady Caroline, out of her own allowance, too, poor creature. There is nothing like those sisters.' And he raised his hand to his face, and would have brushed away the tear that nearly started from his manly eye. I was quite aflected. I respected his griefs, and would 76 CONTAKINI FLEMING; not press him for details. I exhorted him to take cour- age. ' Ay ! ay ! it is very easy talking ; but -when a man, accus- tomed to the society and enjoyments I have been, finds him- self wandering about the world in this manner, it is very easy to talk ; but curse it, do not let us speak of it. And now where do you intend to go ? ' ' I am thinking of Venice.' ' Venice ! just the place I should like to see. But that requires funds. You are welcome to share mine as far as they will last ; but have you anything yourself ? ' ' I have one hundi'ed rix-dollars,' I replied ; ' not too much certainly, but I quitted home without notice. You understand.' ' Oh, yes ! I have done these things myself. At your age I was just such a fellow as you are. A hundred rix- dollars ! not too much to be sure, but with what I have got it will do. I scorn to leave a companion in distress like you. Let me be shivered if I would not share the last farthing with the fellow I liked.' ' You shall never repent, sir, your kindness to me ; of that feel assured. The time may come when I may be enabled to yield you assistance, nor shall it be wanting.' We now began seriously to consult over our plans. He recommended an immediate departure even that night, or else, as he justly remarked, I should get perhaps entangled with these girls. I objected to quitting so unceremoni- ously, and without thanking my kind friends for their hospitality, and making some little present to the worthy manager, but he said that that worthy manager already owed him a year's salary, and therefore I need not be anxious on his account. Hamburg, according to him, was the port to which we must work our way, and, indeed, our departure must not be postponed an hour, for, luckily for us, the next turning was the route to Hamburg. I was A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 77 delighted to find for a friend such a complete man of the world, and doubted not, under his auspices, most prosper- ously to achieve my great object. CHAPTER XVII. ' HERE is your knapsack. I woke the girls getting it. They thought it was you, and would have given me more kind words and kisses than I care for. Theodora laughed heartily when she found out her mistake, but ^Emilia was in a great rage.' ' Good-natured lasses ! I think I must give them a part- ing embrace.' ' Pooh ! pooh ! that will spoil all. Think of Venice. I cannot get at my portmanteau. Never mind, it matters little. I always carry my money about me. We must make some sacrifices, and we shall get on the better for it, for I can now carry our provisions ; and yet my ribbon of the order of the Fox is there pah ! I will not think of it. See ! here runs the Hamburg road. Cheerily, boy, and good-bye to the old waggon.' He hurried me along. I had no time to speak. We pushed on with great spirit, the road again entering the forest, on the skirts of which I had been the whole day journeying. I know this country well,' said Frederick, ' for in old days I have often hunted here with my father's hounds. I can make many a short cut that will save us much. Come along down this glade. We are making fine way.' We continued in this forest several hours, walking with great speed. I was full of hope, and confidence, and self- congratulation, that I had found such a friend. He took the whole management upon himself, always decided upon our course, never lost his readiness. I had no care, the 78 CONTARINI FLEMING: brisk exercise prevented me from feeling wearied. We never stopped. The morning broke, and gave me fresh courage. The sun rose, and it was agreeable to think that I was still nearer Venice. We came to a pleasant piece of turf, fresh from the course of a sparkling rivulet. ' We have gone as good as thirty miles,' said Frederick. ' Had we kept to the common road we should have got through barely half.' ' Have we, indeed ! ' I said. ' This is indeed progress ; but there is nothing like willing hearts. May we get on as well each day ! ' ' Here I propose to rest awhile,' said my companion : ' a few hours' repose will bring us quite round. You must not forget that you rather debauched yesterday.' Now that I had stopped I indeed felt wearied and ex- ceedingly sleepy. My companion kindly plucked some fern, and made me an excellent bed under a branching tree. ' This is, indeed, a life of adventure,' I said. ' How very kind you are ! Such a bed in such a scene would alone repay for all our fatigue.' He produced some bread and a bottle, and gathered some cresses ; but I felt no desire to eat or drink, and before he had finished his meal I had sunk into a deep slumber. I must have slept many hours, for when I woke it was much past noon. I arose wonderfully refreshed. I looked round for Frederick, but, to my surprise, he was not there. I jumped up, and called his name. No answer. I became alarmed, and ran about the vicinity of our encampment, shouting ' Frederick ! ' There was still no answer. Sud- denly I observed that my knapsack also was gone. A ter- rible feeling of doubt, or rather dismay, came over me. I sank down and buried my face in my hands, and it was some minutes before I could even think. ' Can it be ! It is impossible ! Infamous knave, or rather A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 79 miserable ass ! Have I been deceived, entrapped, plun- dered ! 0, Contarini, Contarini, you are at length punished for all your foolery ! Frederick, Frederick ! lie cannot surely have left me. He is joking, he is trying to frighten me. I will not believe that I have been deceived. He must be trying to frighten me. I will not appear frightened. I will not shout in the least. Ah ! I think I see him behind that tree.' I jumped up again and ran to the tree, but there was no Frederick. I ran about, in turn shouting his name, execrating my idiocy, confiding in his good faith, proclaim- ing him a knave. An hour, a heavy but agitating hour, rolled away before I was convinced of the triumph of expe- rience over imagination. I was hungry, I was destitute, I was in a wild and un- known solitude ; I might be starved, I might be murdered, I might die. I could think of nothing but horrible events. I felt for the first time in my life like a victim. I could not bear to recall my old feelings. They were at once mad- dening and mortifying. I felt myself, at the same time, the most miserable and the most contemptible of beings. I entirely lost all my energy. I believed that all men were villains. I sank upon the ground and gave myself up to despair. In a word, I was fairly frightened. I heard a rustling in a neighbouring copse and darted up. I thought it was Frederick. It was not Frederick, but it was a human being. An ancient woodman came forth from a grove of oaks, a comely and venerable man. His white hair, his fresh, hale face, his still, keen eye, and the placid, benignant expression of his countenance, gave me hope. I saluted him, and told him my story. My ap- pearance, my streaming eyes, my visible emotion, were not lost upon him. Sharply he scrutinised me, many were the questions he asked, but he finally credited my tale. I learnt from him that during the night I had advanced into the interior of the forest, that he himself lived in- a cottage on 80 CONTAEINI FLEMING: its skirts some miles off, that lie was about to return from his daily labour, and that I should accompany him. As for the road to Hamburg, that was a complete invention. I also collected that home as well as the college were very distant. We proceeded together along a turf road, with his donkey laden with the day's spoils. I regained my cheerfulness, and was much interested by my new companion. Never had I seen any one so kind, and calm, and so truly vene- rable. "We talked a great deal about trees. He appeared to be entirely master of his calling. I began to long to be a woodman, to pass a quiet, and contemplative, and virtuous life, amid the deep silence and beautiful scenery of forests, exercising all the primitive virtues which became so unso- phisticated a career. His dog darted on before us with joyful speed. We had arrived at his cottage, which was ancient, and neat, and well ordered as himself. His wife, attentive to the welcome bark, was already at the gate. She saluted me ; and her husband, shortly telling my tale, spoke of me in kind terms. Never had I been treated with greater kindness, never was I more grateful for it. The twilight was dying away, the door was locked, the lamp lighted, a blazing log thrown upon the fire, and the round table covered with a plenteous and pleasant meal. I felt quite happy ; and, indeed, to be happy yourself you must live among the happy. The good woman did not join us in our meal, but sat by the fireside under the lamp, watching us with a fond smile. Her appearance delighted me, and seemed like a picture. 'Now does not the young gentleman remind you of Peter ? ' said the dame ; ' for that is just where he used to sit, God bless him. I wonder when we shall hear of him again ? ' ' She speaks of our son, young master,' said my host, turning to me in explanation. A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 81 ' A boy such as has been seldom seen among people of our condition, sir, I can well say,' continued the old woman, speaking Avith great animation. ' Oh! why should he have ever left home? Young people are ever full of fancies, , but will they ever find friends in the world they think so much of, like the father who gives them bread, and the mother who gave them milk ? ' ' My father brought me up at home, and I have ever lived at home,' observed the old man. ' I have ever lived in this forest, many is the tree that is my foster-brother ; and that is sixty-eight years come Martinmas. I saw my father happy, and wished no more. Nor had I ever a heavy hour till Peter began to take these fancies in his head, and that, indeed, was from a boy this high, for he was ever full of them, and never would do anything with the axe. I am sure I do not know how they got there. The day will come he will wish he had never left home, and perhaps we may jet see him.' ' Too late, too late ! ' said the old woman. ' He might have been the prop of our old age. Many is the girl that would have given her eyes for Peter. Our grandchildren might have been running this moment about the room. God bless them, whom we shall never bless. And the old man now must work for his old woman as if it were his wedding year.' ' Pooh ! pooh ! as for that, say nothing,' rejoined Peter ; ' for I praise God my arms and legs are hearty yet. And indeed, were they not, we cannot say that our poor boy has ever forgotten us.' ' Indeed it is true. He is our own son. But where does the money come from ? that is the question. I am sure I often think what I dare not say, and pray God to forgive me. How can a poor woodman's son who never works gain wherewith to support himself, much more to give G 82 CONTAEINI FLEMING: away? I fear that if all had their rights, we should have better means to succour Peter than Peter us.' ' Nay, nay, say not that, dear Mary,' said her husband, reprovingly, ' for it is in a manner tempting the devil.' ' The devil perhaps sent the thought, but it often comes,' answered the old woman, firmly. ' And where is your son, sir ? ' I asked. ' God, who knows all, can tell, not I,' said the old man ; ' but wherever he be I pray God to bless him.' ' Has he left you long, sir ? ' ' Fifteen years come September ; but he ran away once before, when he was barely your height, but that was not for long.' ' Indeed,' I said, reddening. ' I believe he is a good lad,' said the father, ' and will never believe harm against him till I hear it. He was a kind boy, though strong-tempered, and even now every year he sends us something, and sometimes writes a line, but never tells us where he is, only that he is very happy, if we are. But for my part I rather think he is in foreign parts.' ' That is certain,' interrupted Dame Mary. ' I dare say he is got among the French.' ' He was ever a wrong-headed queer chap,' continued the father in an undertone to me ; ' sometimes he wanted to be a soldier, then a painter, then he was all for travelling about ; and I used to say, " Peter, my boy, do you know what you are?" And when I sent him in the woods to work, when he came home at night, I found that he had been a painting the trees ! ' The conversation had taken a turn, which induced medita- tion. I was silent and thoughtful ; the dame busied her- self with work, the old man resumed his unfinished meal. Suddenly there was a shouting at the garden gate. All stared and started. The dog jumped up and barked. The A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 83 shouting Avas repeated, and was evidently addressed to the inmates of the cottage. The old woodman seized his rifle, and opened the casement. ' Who calls? ' he demanded, ' and what want yon?' ' Dwelleth Peter Winter here ? ' was inquired. 1 He speaks to you,' was the reply. ' Open the door, then,' said the shouter. * Tell me first who you are.' ' My name has been already mentioned,' answered the shouter, with a laugh. ' What mean you? ' ' Why, that my name is Peter Winter.' The old woman screamed ; a strange feeling also was my lot ; the woodman dropped the loaded rifle. I prevented it from going off; neither of them could move. At last I opened the door, and the stranger of the Abbey entered. CHAPTER XVIII. THERE was some embracing, much blessing, the old woman never ceased crying, and the eyes of the father were full of tears. The son alone was calm, and imperturbable, and smiling. 'Are you indeed Peter?' exclaimed the old woman, sobbing with joy. ' I never heard so from any one but you,' answered the son. ' And am I blessed with the sight of you before my cleath ? ' continued the mother. ' Death ! why you look ten years younger than when I last saw you ? ' ' Oh ! dear no, Peter. And why did not you tell us where you were ? ' she continued. ' Because I never knew.' G 2 84 CONTARIXI FLEMING: ' ! my dear, dear son, how tall you have grown ! and pray how have you managed to live ? honestly, I am sure : your face says so.' 'As for that, it does not become me to praise myself; but you see I have saved my neck.' ' And what would you like to eat? ' ' Anything.' The father could not speak for silent joy. I had retired to the remotest corner of the room. ' The old cottage pretty as ever. I have got a drawing of it in my portfolio : always kept it, and your portrait too, mother, and my father cutting down Schinkel's oak ; do you remember ? ' ' Do I remember ! Why, what a memory the child has got, and only think of its keeping its poor old mother's head in its pocket-book, and the picture of the cottage, and father cutting down Schinkel's oak. Do I remember ! Why I remember ' ' Come, my dear old lady, give me something to eat, and father, your hand again. You flourish hike one of your foster brothers. A shower of blessings on you both.' ' Ah ! what do we want more than to see our dear Peter ? ' said the old woman bustling about the supper. ' And as for working, I warrant you, you shall be plagued no more about working ; shall be as idle as it pleases, that's for it. For old Peter was only saying this evening, that he could do more work now, and more easily than when he first married ; ay ! he will make old bones, I warra'nt him.' ' I said, Mary ' ' Pooh ! pooh ! never mind what you said, but get the brandy bottle, and give our dear Peter a sup. He shall be plagued no more about working, and that's for it. But, Lord bless us, where is the young master all the time, for I want him to help me get the things.' I stepped forward and caught the eye of the son. A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 85 * What,' lie exclaimed, ' my little embryo poet, and how- came you here, in the name of the holy Magdalen ? ' ' It is a long story,' I said. ' Oh ! then pray do not tell it,' he replied. Supper soon appeared. He ate heartily, talking between each mouthful, and full of jests. The father could not speak, but the mother was never silent. He asked many questions about old acquaintances, and I fancied he asked them with little real interest, and only to gratify his mother, who, at each query, burst into fresh admiration of his memory and his kind-heartedness. At length, after much talk, he said, ' Come, old people, to bed ! to bed ! these hours are not for grey hairs. We shall have you all knocked up to-morrow, instead of fresh and joyful.' ' I am sure I cannot sleep,' said the dame, ' I am in such a taking.' ' Pooh ! you must sleep, mother : good night to you, good night,' and embracing her he pushed her into the next room ; good night, dear father,' he added in a soft and serious tone, as he pressed the honest woodman's hand. ' And now, little man, you may tell me your story, and we will try to talk each other to sleep.' So saying, he flung a fresh log on the fire, and stretched his legs in his father's ancient seat. CHAPTER XIX. IT was settled that I should remain at the cottage for a few days, and then that, accompanying Winter, I should repair to the capital. Thither he was bound ; and for myself, both from his advice and my own impulse, I had resolved to return home. On the next morning the woodman went not to his usual labour, but remained with his son. They strolled out to- 86 CONTAKDtt FLEMING: gether, but in a short time returned. The mother bustled about preparing a good dinner. For her this was full employment, but time hung heavy on the old man. At last he took his axe and fairly set to work at an old tree near his dwelling, which he had long condemned, and never found time to execute. His son and he had few ideas to ex- change, and he enjoyed his happiness more while he was em- ployed. Winter proposed a ramble to me, and I joined him. He was gay, but would not talk about himself, which I wished. I longed to know what he exactly was, but deemed a direct inquiry indelicate. He delighted to find out places he had known when young, and laughed at me very much about my adventures. ' You see what it is to impart knowledge to youth like you. In eight-and-forty hours all these valuable secrets are given to Master Frederick, who will perhaps now turn out a great poet.' I bore his rallying as good-humouredly as he could wish, and tried to lead our conversation to subjects which in- terested me. * Ask me no more questions,' he said, ' about yourself, I have told yon everything. All that I can recommend you now is to practise self-forgetfulness.' We rested ourselves on a bank and talked about foreign countries, of which, though he himself never figured in his tales, he spoke without reserve. My keen attention proved with what curiosity and delight I caught each word. Whenever he paused, I led him by a question to a fresh narrative. I could not withstand expressing how I was charmed by such conversation. ' All that I tell you,' he said, and much more, may be found in books. Those that cannot themselves observe, can at least acquire the observation of others. These are indeed shadows, but by watching these shadows we learn that there are substances. Little man, you should read more. At your time of life you can do nothing better than read good books of travels.' A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 87 ' But is it not better myself to travel ? ' ' Have I not told you that your wandering days have not yet come ? Do you wish to meet another Mr. Frederick ? You are much too young. Travel is the great source of true wisdom, but to travel with profit you must have such a thing as previous knowledge. Do you comprehend ? ' ' Ah ! sir, I fear me much that I am doomed to bo unhappy.' ' Poh ! Poh ! Clear your head of all such nonsense. There is no such thing as unhappiness.' ' No such thing as unhappiness, sir ? How may this be, for all men believe .' ' All men believe many things which are not true ; but remember what I say, and when you have lived as long as I have, you will perhaps discover that it is not a paradox. In the meantime it is nonsense talking about it, and I have got an enormous appetite. A fine dinner to-day for us, I warrant you.' So we returned home at a brisk pace. The old woman looked out at the door when she heard our steps, and, nodding to her son with a smile of fondness, 'You must walk in the garden awhile, Peter,' she said, ' for I am busy getting the room ready. Now, I dare say you are thinking of the dinner, but you cannot tell me what there is for Peter, that you cannot. But I'll tell you, for if you fret yourself with guessing, mayhap it will hurt your relish. Do you remember crying once for a pig, Peter, and father saying a woodman's boy must not expect to live like the forest farmer's son ? Well, he may say what he likes ; Peter, there is a pig.' The father joined us, cleanly shaved, and in his Sunday raiment. I never saw any one look so truly respectable as did this worthy old peasant in his long blue coat with large silver buttons, deep waistcoat covered with huge pink flowers and small green leaves, blue stockings, and massy buckles. 88 CONTAPJNI FLEMING: The three days at the woodman's cottage flew away most pleasantly. I was grieved when they were gone, and, in spite of my natural courage, which was confirmed by meditation, and strengthened by my constantly trying it in ideal conjunctures, I thought of my appearance at home with a little anxiety. "We were to perform our journey on foot. The morning of the third day was to light us into the city. All was prepared. I parted from my kind friends with many good wishes, hearty shakes of the hand, and frequent promises of another visit. Peter was coming to them again very shortly. They hoped I might again be his companion. The father walked on with us some little way. The mother stood at the cottage door until we were out of sight, smiling through her tears, and waving her hand with many blessings. ' I must take care of my knapsack,' said the younger Winter, ' evil habits are catching.' ' Nevertheless, I hope you will sometimes let me carry it. At any rate give me your portfolio.' ' No, no, you are not to be trusted, and so come on.' CHAPTER XX. ' BUT, my dear friend, you have lodged, you have fed, you have befriended, you have supported me. If my father were to know that we parted thus he would never forgive me. Pray, pray, tell me.' ' Prithee, no more. You have told me your name, which is against my rules ; you know mine, no one of my fellow- travellers ever did before ; and yet you are not con- tented. You grow unreasonable. Did I not say that, if our acquaintance were worth maintaining, we should A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 89 meet again ? Well ! I say the same thing now, and so good bye.' ' Dear sir, pray, pray ' ' This is my direction ; your course lies over that bridge ; look sharp about you, and do not enter into your private world, for the odds are you may find your friend Count Frederick picking a pocket. Good morning, little man.' We parted, and I crossed the bridge. The stir of man seemed strange after the silence of the woods. I did not feel quite at my ease ; my heart a little misgave me. I soon reached the street in which my father resided. I thought of the woodman's cottage, and the careless days I had spent under that simple roof. I wished myself once more by Schinkel's oak, talking of Araby the Blest with that strange man, with whom my acquaintance, although so recent, seemed now only a dream. Did he really exist ; were they all real beings with whom I seemed lately to have consorted ? Or had I indeed been all this time plunged in one of my incurable reveries ? I thought of the laughing girl, and her dark sentimental friend. I felt for the chain which I always wore round my neck. It was gone. No doubt, then, it must all be true. I had reached the gate. I uttered an involuntary sigh and took up the knocker. It was for a moment suspended. I thought of the Contarinis, and my feeble knock hurried into a sharp rap. ' 'Tis a nervous business,' thought I, ' there is no concealing it. 'Tis flat rebellion, 'tis desertion, 'tis an outrage of all parental orders, 'tis a violation of the law of nature and nations.' I sighed again. ' Yet these are all bugbears ; for what can they do to me ? Is there any punishment that they can inflict that I care for ? Certainly not, and 'tis likely it will all blow over. Yet the explanations, and the vile excuses, and the petty examinations, there is something pitiful, and contemptible, and undignified, in the whole process. What is it that so 90 CONTAEIXI FLEMING : annoys me ? 'Tis not fear. I think it is the disgust of being accountable to any human being.' I went upstairs. My father, I felt sure, was away. I found the Baroness alone. She started when I entered, and looked sullen. Her countenance, she flattered herself, was a happy mixture of the anxiety which became both a spouse and a mother, pity for my father, pity for me, and decided indignation at my very improper conduct. ' How do you do, Madam ? ' I enquired in as quiet a tone as I could command. ' My father is, I suppose, at his office.' ' I am sure I cannot tell,' she replied, speaking in a sub- dued serious tone, as if there were death in the house. ' I believe he lias gone out to-day. He has been very agitated indeed, and I think is extremely unwell. We have all been extremely agitated and alarmed. I have kept myself as quiet as I could, but can bear no noise whatever. The Baron has received a fine letter from your tutor,' she continued in a brisker, and rather malignant tone, ' but your father will speak to you. I know nothing about these things. I wished to have said something to soothe him, but I know I never interfere for any good.' ' Well,' I observed, with a dogged, desperate tone, speak- ing through my teeth, ' well ! all I can say is, that if my father has been prejudiced against me by a parcel of in- famous falsehoods, as it appears by your account, I know how to protect myself. I see how the ground lies ; I see that I have already been judged, and am now to be punished, without a trial. But I will not submit any longer to such persecution. Kindness in this house I never expect, but justice is a right enjoyed by a common woodman and denied only to me.' ' Dear me, Contarini, how violent you are ! I never said your father was even angry. I only said I thought he was a little unwell, a little bilious, I think. My dear Contarini, A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 91 you are always so very violent. I am sure I said I was con- fident you would never have left college without a very good cause indeed. I have no doubt you will explain everything in the most satisfactory manner possible. I do not know what you mean always by talking of not expecting kindness in this house. I am sure I never interfere with you. I make it a rule always, when your interest is in the least con- cerned, never to give an opinion. I am sure I wish you were more happy and less violent. As for judging and punishing without a trial, you know your father never punishes any one, nor has he decided anything, for all he knows is from the letter of your tutor, and that is but a line, merely saying you had quitted the college without leave, and, as they supposed, had gone home. They said, too, that they were the more surprised, as your general behaviour was quite unexceptionable. Not at all against you the letter was, not at all, I assure you. I pointed out to your father more than once that the letter was, if any- thing, rather in your favour, because I had no doubt that you would explain the step in a satisfactory manner ; and they said, you see, that your conduct, otherwise, was per- fectly unexceptionable. ' Well, my dear Madam, I am sorry if I have offended you. How are my brothers ? ' ' I am willing to forget it. Tou may say and think what you please, Contarini, as long as you are not violent. The children are pretty well. Ernest is quite ready to go to college, and now there is no one to take care of him. I always thought of your being there with quite a feeling of satisfaction, for I was sure that you would not refuse to do what you could for him among the boys. As it is, I have no doubt he will be killed the first half-year, or, at least, have a limb broken, for, poor dear boy, he is so delicate, he cannot fight.' ' Well, my dear Madam, if I be not there, I can recom- 1)2 CONTARINI FLEMING: mend him to some one who will take care of him. Make yourself easy. A little rough life will do him no harm, and I will answer he is not killed, and even have not a limb broken. Now what do you recommend me to do about my father ? Shall I walk down to him ? ' ' I certainly think not. You know that he will certainly be at home this afternoon, though, to be sure, he will be engaged ; but to-morrow, or the day after, I have no doubt he will find half an hour to speak to you. You know he is so very busy.' I immediately resolved to walk down to him. I had no idea of having a scene impending over me in this manner for days. My father at this time filled the office of Secretary of State for Foreign Affairs. He had been appointed to this post recently, and I had never yet visited him at his new office. I repaired to it immediately. It was at some distance from his house. His horses were waiting at the door ; therefore I was sure that he was to be found. "When I entered, I found myself in a hall where a porter was loitering in a large chair. I asked him for Baron Fleming. He did not deign to answer me, but pointed to a mahogany door. I entered, and found myself in a large well-furnished room, fitted up with desks. At the end two young men were fencing. Another, seated at a round table, covered with papers, was copying music, and occasionally trying a note on his guitar. A fourth was throwing himself into attitudes before a pier-glass ; and the fifth, who was the only one whose employment was in any degree of a political nature, was seated at his desk, reading the newspaper. No one noticed my entrance. I looked in vain for my father, and with some astonishment at those I found in his place. Then I enquired for Baron Fleming, and, for the second time in one day, I did not receive any answer. I repeated my queiy in a more audible tone, and the young gentleman who was reading the newspaper, without taking A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 93 his eyes off the columns, demanded in a curt voice what I wanted with him. ' What is that to you ? ' I ingenuously asked. This unusual reply excited attention. They all looked at me ; and when they had looked at me, they looked at each other and smiled. My appearance, indeed, of which till I had seen myself in the pier-glass I was not sensible, was well calculated to excite a smile and to attract a stare. My clothes were not untattered, and were very much soiled, being covered with shreds of moss and blades of grass, and stuck over with thistle-tops ; my boots had not been cleaned for a week ; my shirt-frill, which fell over my shoulders, was torn and dirtied ; my dishevelled and unbrushed locks reached my neck, and could scarcely be said to be covered by the small forester's cap which I always wore at school, and in which I had decamped. Animate the countenance of this strange figure with that glow of health which can only be obtained by the pedestrian, and which seemed to shock the nerves of this company of dapper youths. ' If you want Baron Fleming, then, you must go upstairs,' said the student of the newspaper in a peevish voice. As I shut the door I heard the burst of laughter. I mounted up the great staircase and came into an antechamber. ' What do you want, sir ? what do you want, sir ? You must not come here,' said a couple of pompous messengers nearly pushing me out. ' I shall not go away,' I replied. ' I want Baron Fleming.' ' Engaged, young gentleman, engaged ; can't see any one, impossible.' ' I shall wait, then.' ' No use waiting, young gentleman, better go.' ' It is not such an easy matter, I perceive, to see one's father,' I thought to myself. I did not know which was his room, otherwise I would 94 CONTARINI FLEMING : have gone in ; but turning round, I detected written on a door, ' Under Secretary's Office,' and I ran to it. ' Stop, sir, stop,' said the messengers. But I had hold of the lock. They pulled me, I kicked the door, and out came the private secretary of the under secretary. ' What is all this?' asked the private secretary. He was a fit companion for the young gentleman I had left down- stairs. ' I want Baron Fleming,' I replied, ' and these men will not tell me where he is, and therefore I come to the under secretary to ask.' So saying, I indignantly freed my arm from the capture of one of the messengers, and kicked the shin of the other. * May I ask who you are ? ' demanded the private secretary. ' I am Baron Contarini Fleming,' I replied. ' Pray sit down,' said the private secretary, ' I will be with you in a moment.' The two messengers darted back, and continued bowing without turning their backs until they unexpectedly reached the end of the room. The private secretary returned with the under secretary. The under secretary told me that my father was engaged with the chancellor, and that his door was locked, but that the moment the door was unlocked, and the chancellor departed, he would take care that he was informed of my arrival. In the meantime, as he himself had a deputation to receive in his room, who were to come to day to complain in form of what they had for months been complaining informally, he begged that I would have the kindness to accompany his private secretary to the room downstairs. The room downstairs I again entered. The private secre- tary introduced me. All looked very confused, and the young gentleman who was still reading the newspaper immediately handed it to me. I had never read a news- A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 95 paper in my life, but I accepted his offer to show my im- portance. As I did not understand politics I turned to the back of the sheet, where there is generally an article on the fine arts, or a review of a new book. My wandering eye fixed upon a memoir of the Chevalier de Winter. I was equally agitated and astonished. My eye quivered over the page. I saw in an instant enough to convince me it was my friend, and that my friend was styled ' a great ornament to the country,' and the Northmen were congratulated on at length producing an artist whom the Italians themselves acknowledged unrivalled among the living. I learnt that he was the son of a peasant ; how his genius for painting early developed itself; how he had led for years an eccentric and wandering life ; how he had returned to Rome, and at once produced a master-piece ; how he had gained prizes in academies ; how he was esteemed and honoured by foreign princes ; how his own illustrious monarch, ever alive to the patronage of the fine arts, had honoured him with two commissions ; how he had returned to his native country with these magnificent pictures, which were daily exhibit- ing in the Royal Academy of Arts ; how the king had con- ferred on him the collar of a high order, and offered him a great pension; how he had refused the pension, and re- quested only that a competence might be settled on his parents. I was bewildered; I fell into a deep reverie, the paper dropped from my hand, the door opened, and the private secretary summoned me to the presence of my father. CHAPTER XXI. IT is time that you should know something of my father. You must remember that he was little more than a score of years my senior. Imagine, then, a man of about four and 96 CONTAKINI FLEMING: thirty years of age, tall and thin, handsome and elegant, pensive and pale. His clear, broad brow ; his aquiline, but delicately-chiselled nose ; his grey, deep-set, and penetra- ting eye ; and his compressed lips ; altogether formed a countenance which enchanted women and awed men. His character is more difficult to delineate. It was per- haps inscrutable. I will attempt to sketch it, as it might then have appeared to those who considered themselves qualified to speculate upon human nature. His talents were of high order, and their exercise alone had occasioned his rise in a country in which he had no interest and no connexions. He had succeeded in everything he had undertaken. As an orator, as a negotiator, and in all the details of domestic administration, he was alike eminent ; and his luminous interpretation of national law had elevated the character of his monarch in the opinion of Europe, and had converted a second-rate power into the mediator between the highest. The minister of a free people, he was the personal as well as the political pupil of Metternich. Tet he respected the institutions of his country, because they existed, and because experience proved that under their influence tho natives had become more powerful machines. His practice of politics was compressed in two words, subtilty and force. The minister of an emperor, he would have maintained his system by armies ; in the cabinet of a small kingdom, he compensated for his deficiency by intrigue. His perfection of human nature was a practical man. He looked upon a theorist either with alarm or with con- tempt. Proud in his own energies, and conscious that he owed everything to his own dexterity, he believed all to depend upon the influence of individual character. He required men not to think but to act, not to examine but to obey ; and, animating their brute force with his own A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 97 intelligence, he found the success, which he believed could never be attained by the rational conduct of an enlightened people. Out of the cabinet the change of his manner might perplex the superficial. The moment that he entered society his thoughtful face would break into a fascinating smile, and he listened with interest to the tales of levity, and joined with readiness in each frivolous pursuit. He was sumptuous in his habits, and was said to be even voluptuous. Perhaps he affected gallantry, because he was deeply im- pressed with the influence of women both upon public and upon private opinion. With them he was a universal favourite ; and as you beheld him assenting with convic- tion to their gay or serious nonsense, and gracefully waving his handkerchief in his delicate and jewelled hand, you might have supposed him for a moment a consummate lord chamberlain ; but only for a moment, for had you caught his eye, you would have withdrawn your gaze with pre- cipitation, and perhaps with awe. For the rest, he spoke all languages, never lost his self-possession, and never, in my recollection, had displayed a spark of strong feeling. I loved my father deeply, but my love was mixed with more than reverence ; it was blended with fear. He was the only person before whom I ever quailed. To me he had been universally kind. I could not recall, in the whole period of my existence, a single harsh word directed to myself that had ever escaped him. Whenever he saw me he smiled and nodded ; and sometimes, in early days, when I requested an embrace, he had pressed my lips. As I grew in years everything was arranged that could conduce to my happiness. Whatever I desired was granted ; what- ever wish I expressed was gratified. Yet with all this, by some means or other which I could not comprehend, the intercourse between my father and myself seemed never to advance. I was still to him as much an infant as if I were 98 CONTAEINI FLEMING : yet a subject of the nursery; and the impending and im- portant interview might be considered the first time that it was ever my fortune to engage with him in serious con- verse. The door was opened ; my heart palpitated ; the private secretary withdrew ; I entered the lofty room. My father was writing. He did not look up as I came in. I stood at his table a second ; he raised his eyes, stared at my odd appearance, and then, pointing to a chair, he said, ' How do you do, Contarini ? I have been expecting you some days.' Then he resumed his writing. I was rather surprised, but my entrance had so agitated me that I was not sorry to gain time. A clock was opposite to me, and I employed myself in watching the hands. They advanced over one, two, three minutes slowly and solemnly ; still my father wrote ; even five minutes dis- appeared, and my father continued writing. I thought five minutes had never gone so slowly ; I began to think of what I should say, and to warm up my courage by an imaginary conversation. Suddenly I observed that ten minutes had flown, and these last five had scudded in a surprising manner. Still my father was employed. At length he rang his bell ; one of my friends, the messengers, entered. My father sent for Mr. Strelamb, and before Mr. Strelamb, who was his private secretary, appeared, he had finished his letter, and given it to the other messenger. Then Mr. Strelamb came in, and seated himself opposite to my father, and took many notes with an attention and quickness which appeared to me quite marvellous ; and then my father, looking at the clock, said he had an ap- pointment with the Prussian ambassador, at his palace : but, while Mr. Strelamb was getting some papers in order for him, he sent for the under secretary, and gave him so many directions that I thought the under secretary must have the most wonderful memory in the world. At length A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 99 my father left the room, saying as he quitted it, ' Rest you here, Contarini.' I was consoled for this neglect by the consciousness that my father was a very great man indeed. I had no idea of such a great man. I was filled with awe. I looked out of window to see him mount his horse ; but, just as he had got one foot in the stirrup, a carriage dashed up to the door ; my father withdrew his foot, and, saluting the person in the carriage, entered it. It was the Austrian ambassador. In ten minutes he came out ; but just as the steps were rattled up, and the chasseur had closed the door with his best air, my father returned to the carriage ; but he re- mained only a minute, and then, mounting his horse, gal- loped off. ' This is, indeed, a great man,' I thought, ' and I am his son.' I began to muse upon this idea of political greatness. The simple woodman, and his decorous cottage, and his free forest life recurred to my mind, unaccompanied by that feeh'ng of satisfaction which I had hitherto associated with them, and were pictured in faded and rather insipid colours. Poetry and philosophy, and the delights of solitude, and the beauty of truth, and the rapture of creation, I know not how it was, they certainly did not figure in such para- mount beauty and colossal importance as I had previously viewed them. I thought of my harassing hours of doubt and diffidence with disgust ; I sickened at the time wasted over imperfect efforts at what, when perfect, seemed some- how of questionable importance. I was dissatisfied with my past life. Ambassadors and chancellors, under secre- taries and private secretaries and public messengers flitted across my vision. I was sensibly struck at the contrast between all this greatness achieved, and moving before me in its quick and proud reality, and my weak meditations of unexecuted purposes, and dreamy visions of imaginary grandeur. I threw myself in my father's chair, took up a 100 COXTAKINI FLEMING- : peu, and insensibly to myself while I indulged in these reflections, scribbled Contarini Fleming over every paper that offered itself for my signature. My father was a long while away. I fell into a profound reverie ; he entered the room ; I did not observe him ; I was entirely lost. I was engaged in a conversation with both the Prussian and Austrian ambassadors together. My father called me ; I did not hear him. My eyes were fixed on vacancy, but I was listening with the greatest attention to their Excellencies. My father approached, lifted me gently from his seat, and placed me in my original chair. I stared, looked up, and shook myself like a man awakened. He slightly smiled, and then seating himself, shrugging up his shoulders at my labours, and arranging his papers, he said at the same time ' Now, Contarini, I wish you to tell me why you have left your college ? ' This was a home query, and entirely brought me to my- self. With the greatest astonishment I found that I had no answer. I did not speak, and my father commenced writing. In two or three instants he said, ' "Well, can you answer my question ? ' ' Yes, sir,' I replied to gain time. 'Well! tell me.' ' Because, sir, because it was no use staying there.' ' Why ? ' ' Because I learned nothing.' ' Were you the first boy in the school, or the last ? Had you learnt everything that they could teach you, or no thin cr ? ' ' I was neither first nor last ; not that I should be ashamed of being last where I consider it no honour to be first.' 'Why not?' ' Because I do not think it an enviable situation to be the first among the learners of words.' A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 101 My father gave me a sharp glance, and then said, ' Did you leave college because you considered that they taught you only words ? ' ' Yes, sir ; and because I wish to learn ideas.' ' Some silly book has filled your head, Contarini, with these ridiculous notions about the respective importance of words and ideas. Few ideas are correct ones, and what are correct no one can ascertain ; but with words we govern men.' This observation completely knocked up all my philo- sophy, and I was without an answer. ' I tell you what, Contarini : I suspect that there must be some other reason for this step of yours. I wish you to tell it to me. If you were not making there that progress which every intelligent youth desires, such a circumstance might be a very good reason for your representing your state to your parent, and submitting it to his consideration ; but you, you have never complained to me upon the subject. You said nothing of the kind when you were last with me ; you never communicated it by letter. I never heard of a boy running away from school because they did not teach him sufficient, or sufficiently well. Your instructors do not complain of your conduct, except with regard to this step. There must be some other reason which induced you to adopt a measure which, I flatter myself, you have already learnt to consider as both extremely unauthorised and very injudicious.' I had a good mind to pour it all out. I had a good mind to dash Venice in his teeth, and let him chew it as he could. I was on the point of asking a thousand ques- tions, for a solution of which I had been burning all my life, but the force of early impressions was too strong. I shunned the fatal word, and remained silent, with a clouded brow, and my eyes fixed upon the ground. ' Answer me, Contarini,' he continued ; ' you know that 102 CONTAEINI FLEMING: all I ask is only for your good. Answer me, Contarini ; I request that you answer me. . Were you uncomfortable ? Were you unhappy ? ' ' I am always unhappy,' I replied, in a gloomy tone. My father moved round his chair. ' You astonish me, Contarini ! Unhappy ! always unhappy ! Why are you unhappy ? I should have thought you the happiest boy of my acquaintance. I am sure I cannot conceive what makes you unhappy. Pray tell me. Is there anything you want ? Have I done, has anybody done anything to annoy you ? Have you anything upon your mind ? ' I did not answer; my eyes were still fixed upon the ground, the tears stealing down my cheek, tears not of tenderness but rage. ' My dear Contarini,' continued my father, ' I must in- deed earnestly request you to answer me. Throughout life you have never disobeyed me. Do not let to-day be an epoch of rebellion. Speak to me frankly ; tell me why you are unhappy. ' Because I have no one I love, because there is no one who loves me, because I hate this country, because I hate everything and everybody, because I hate myself.' I rose from my seat and stamped about the room. My father was perfectly astounded. He had thought that I might possibly have got into debt, or had a silly quarrel ; but he did not lose his self-command. ' Sit down, Contarini,' he said, calmly. 'Never give way to your feelings. Explain to me quietly what all this means. What book have you been reading to fill your head with all this nonsense ? What could have so suddenly altered your character ? ' ' I have read no book ; my character is what it always was, and I have only expressed to-day, for the first time, what I have ever felt. Life is intolerable to me, and I wish to die.' A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 103 ' What can you mean by persons not loving you ? ' re- sumed my father ; ' I am sure the Baroness ' ' The Baroness ! ' I interrupted him in a sharp tone ' what is the Baroness to me ? Always this wretched nursery view of life, always considered an insignificant, unmeaning child! What is the Baroness and her petty persecutions to me ? Pah ! ' I grew bold. The truth is my vanity was flattered by finding the man who was insensible to all, and before whom all trembled, yield his sympathy and his time to me. I began to get interested in the interview. I was excited by this first conversation with a parent. My suppressed character began unconsciously to develop itself, and I un- intentionally gave way to my mind, as if I were in one of my own scenes. ' I should be sorry if there were even petty persecutions,' said my father, ' and equally so if you were insensible to them ; but I hope that you speak only under excited feel- ings. For your father, Contarini, I can at least answer that his conscience cannot accuse him of a deficiency in love for one who has such strong claims upon a father's affection. I can indeed say that I have taken no important step in life which had not for its ulterior purpose your benefit ; and what, think you, can sweeten this all-engross- ing and perhaps fatal labour, to which I am devoted, but the thought that I am toiling for the future happiness of my child ? You are young, Contarini. Some day you will become acquainted with the feelings of a father, and you will then blush with shame and remorse that you ever accused me of insensibility.' While he spoke I was greatly softened. The tears stole down my cheek. I leant my arm upon the table, and tried to shade my face with my hand. My father rose from his seat, turned the key of the door, and resumed his place. 'Occupied with affairs,' he resumed, 'which do not 104 CONTARDsI FLEMING: always allow me sleep, I have never found time for those slight parental offices which I do not think less delightful because it has been my misfortune not to fulfil or to enjoy them. But you, Contarini, have never been absent from my thoughts, and I had considered that I had made such arrangements as must secure you the gratification of eveiy innocent desire. But to-day I find, for the first time, that I have been mistaken for years. I regret it ; I wish, if possible, to compensate for my unhappy neglect, or rather unfortunate ignorance. Tell me, Contarini, what do you wish me to do ? ' ' Nothing, nothing,' I sobbed and sighed. ' But if necessity have hitherto brought us less together than I could wish, you are now, Contarini, fast advancing to that period of life to which I looked forward as a con- solatory recompense for this deplorable estrangement. I hoped to find in you a companion. I hoped that I might have the high gratification of forming you into a great and a good man, that I might find in my son not merely a being to be cherished, but a friend, a counsellor, a colleague, yes ! Contarini, perhaps a successor.' I clasped my hands in agony, but restrained a cry. ' And now,' he continued, ' I am suddenly told, and by himself, that I have never loved him ; but still more painful, still more heartrending, is the accompanying declaration, which, indeed, is what I could not be prepared for. Mis- conception on his part, however improbable, might have accounted for his crediting my coldness ; but alas ! I have no room for hope or doubt. His plain avowal can never be misconstrued. I must then yield to the terrible conviction that I am an object of abhorrence to my child.' I flung myself at his feet, I seized his hand, I kissed it, and bathed it with my tears. ' Spare me, oh ! spare me ! ' I faintly muttered. ' Hence- forth I will be all you wish ! ' I clung upon his hand, I A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 105 would not rise till he pardoned me. ' Pardon me,' I said, ' pardon me, I beseech, you, father, for I spoke in madness. Pardon me, pardon me, dear father ! It was in madness, for indeed there is something which comes over me some- times like madness, but now it will never come, because you love me. Only tell me that you love me, and I will always do everything. I am most grieved for what I said about the Baroness. She is too good ! I will never give you again an uneasy moment, not a single uneasy moment. Now that I know that you love me, you may depend upon me, you may indeed. You may depend upon me for ever ! ' He smiled, and raised me from the ground, and kissed my forehead. ' Compose yourself, dearest boy. Strelamb must soon come in. Try more to repress your feelings. There, sit down, and calm yourself.' He resumed his writing directly, and I sat sobbing my- self into composure. In about a quarter of an hour, he said, ' I must send for Strelamb now, Contarini. If you go into the next room, you can wash your face.' When I returned, my father said, ' Come ! come ! you look quite blooming. By the bye, you are aware what a very strange figure you are, Contarini? After being closeted all the morning with me, they will think, from your costume, that you are a foreign ambassador. Now go home and dress, for I have a large dinner party to-day, and I wish you to dine with me. There are several persons whom you should know. And, if you like, jon may take my horses, for I had rather walk home.' CHAPTER XXII. I WAS so very happy that, for some time, I did not think of the appalling effort that awaited me. It was not till I had fairly commenced dressing that I remembered that in tho 106 CONTAEINI FLEMING- : course of an hour, for the first time in my life, I was to enter a room full of strangers, conducting themselves with ease, in all that etiquette of society in which I was entirely unpractised. My heart misgave me. I wished myself again in the forest. I procrastinated my toilet to the last possible moment. Ignorant of the art of dress, I found myself making a thousand experiments, all of which failed. The more I consulted my glass the less favourable was the im- pression. I brushed my hair out of curl. I confined my neck for the first time in a cravat. Each instant my appearance became more awkward, more formal, and more ineffective. At last I was obliged to go down ; and, less at my ease, and conscious of appearing worse than ever I did in my life, at the only moment of that life in which appear- ance had been of the slightest consequence, and had ever occupied my thoughts, I entered the room at a side door. It was very full, as I had expected. I stole in without being observed, which a little re-animated my courage. I looked round in vain for a person I knew ; I crept to a corner. All seemed at their ease. All were smiling ; all exchanging words, if not ideas. The women all appeared beautiful, the men all elegant. I painfully felt my wretched inferiority. I watched the Baroness, magnificently attired and sparkling with diamonds, wreathed with smiles, and scattering without effort phrases which seemed to diffuse universal pleasure. This woman, whom I had presumed to despise and dared to insult, became to me an object of admiration and of envy. She even seemed to me beautiful. I was bewildered. Suddenly a gentleman approached me. It was the under secretary. I was delighted by his notice. I answered his many uninteresting questions about every school pastime, which I detested, as if I felt the greatest interest in their recollection. All that I desired was that he would not leave me, that I might at least appear to be doing what the others were, and might be supposed to be charmed, although A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 107 I was in torture. At length he walked off to another group, and I found myself once more alone, apparently without a single chance of keeping up the ball. I felt as if every one were watching with wonder the strange, awkward, ugly, silent boy. I coined my cheek into a base smile, but I found that it would not pass. I caught the eye of the Baroness ; she beckoned me to come to her. I joined her without delay. She introduced me to a lady who was sitting at her side. This lady had a son at the college, and asked me many questions. I answered in a nervous, rapid manner, as if her son were my most intimate friend, gave the anxious mother a complete detail of all his occupations, and praised the institution up to the seventh heaven. I was astonished at the tone of affection with which the Baroness addressed me, at the interest which she took in everything which concerned me. It was ever ' Contarini, dear,' ' Contarini, my love,' ' You have been riding to-day. Where have you been ? I have hardly had time to speak to you. He only came home to-day. He is looking vastly well.' 'Very well, indeed.' 'Very much grown.' 'Oh! amazingly.' ' Quite a beau for you, Baroness.' ' Oh! yes, quite delightful.' What amiable people ! I thought, and what would I give to be once more in old Winter's cottage ! The door opened ; the Chevalier de Winter was an- nounced. My fellow-traveller entered the room, though I could scarcely recognise him in his rich and even fanciful dress, and adorned with his brilliant order. I was struck with his fine person, his noble carriage, and his highly- polished manner. Except my father, I had never seen so true a nobleman. The Baron went forward to receive him with his most courteous air and most fascinating smile. I withdrew as he led him to my mother. I watched the Baroness as she rose to greet him. I was surprised at the warmth of her welcome, and the tone of consideration with which she received him. Some of the guests, who were the 108 CONTAEINI FLEMING: highest nobles in the country, requested my father to pre- sent them to him : with others Winter was already ac- quainted, and they seemed honoured by his recognition. ' This also is a great man,' I exclaimed, ' but of a diffe- rent order.' Old feelings began to boil up from the abyss in which I had plunged them. I sympathised with this great and triumphant artist. In a few days it seemed that the history of genius had been acted before me for my instruction, and for my encouragement. A combination of circumstances had allowed me to trace this man from his first hopeless obscurity. I had seen all; the strong predis- position, the stubborn opposition of fortune, the first efforts, the first doubts, the paramount conviction, the long struggle, the violated ties, the repeated flights, the deep studies, the sharp discipline, the great creation, and the glorious triumph. My father, crossing the room, saw me. ' Contarini,' he said, ' where have you been all this time ? I have been often looking for you. Come with me, and I will introduce you to the Chevalier de Winter, one of the first painters in the world, and who has just come from Rome. You must go and see his pictures ; every one is talking of them. Always know eminent men, and always be master of the subject of the day. Chevalier,' for we had now come up to him, ' my son desires your acquaintance.' ' Ah ! fellow-traveller, welcome, welcome ; I told you we should soon meet again,' and he pressed my hand with warmth. ' Sir, I had a prescience that I had been the companion of a great man.' This was pretty well said for a bashful youth, but it was really not a compliment. The moment I addressed Winter, I resumed unconsciously my natural tone, and reminded by his presence that higher accomplishments and qualities existed than a mere acquaintance with etiquette, and the A PSYCHOLOGICAL KOMANCE. 109 vivacity which could enliven the passages of ordinary con- versation, I began to feel a little more at my ease. Dinner was announced. The table was round. I sat between the under secretary and the lady to whom I had been introduced. The scene was a novel one, and I was astonished at observing a magnificent repast, which all seemed to pique themselves upon tasting as little as possible. They evidently assemble here, then, I thought, for the sake of conversation ; yet how many are silent, and what is said might be omitted. But I was then ignorant of the purposes for which human beings are brought together. My female companion, who was a little wearied by a great general, who, although a hero and a strategist, was soon beaten and bewildered in a campaign of repartee, turned round to amuse herself with her other supporter. Her terrific child was again introduced. I had drunk a glass or two of wine, and altogether had, in a great degree, recovered my self-possession. I could support her tattle no longer. I assured the astonished mother that I had never even heard of her son ; that, if really at college, he must be in a different part of the establishment, and that I had never met him ; that I did not even know the name ; that the college was a very bad college indeed, that nobody learnt anything there, that I abhorred it, and hoped that I should never return ; and then I asked her to do me the honour of taking wine. CHAPTER XXIII. THE day after the party, I went with the Baroness to see the great pictures of Winter in the Royal Academy of Arts. Both of them seemed to be magnificent ; but one, which was a national subject, and depicted the emancipating exploits of one of the heroic monarchs, was the most 110 CONTAEINI FLEMING: popular. I did not feel so much interested with this. I did noir sympathise with the gloomy savage scene, the black pine forests, the rough mountains, the feudal forms and dresses ; but the other, which was of a different character, afforded me exquisite delight. It represented a procession going up to sacrifice at a temple in a Grecian isle. The brilliant colouring, the beautiful and beautifully- clad forms, the delicate Ionian fane, seated on a soft acclivity covered with sunny trees, the classical and lovely back-ground, the deep-blue sea, broken by a tall white scudding- sail, and backed by undulating and azure moun- tains ; I stood before it in a trance ; a crowd of ideas swiftly gathered in my mind. It was a poem. After this I called upon Winter and found him in his studio. Many persons were there, and of high degree. It was the first time I had ever been in the studio of an artist. I was charmed with all I saw; the infinite sketches, the rough studies, the unfinished pictures, the lay figure, the beautiful cast, and here and there some choice relic of antiquity, a torso, a bust, or a gem. I remained here the whole morning examining his Venetian sketches, and a day seldom passed over that I did not drop in to pay my devotions at this delightful temple. I was indeed so much at home, that if he were engaged, I resumed my portfolio without notice, so that in time I knew perhaps more about Venice than many persons who had passed their whole lives there. When I had been at home a fortnight, my father one day invited me to take a ride with him, and began con- versing with me on my plans. He said that he did not wish me to return to college, but that he thought me at least a year too young to repair to the university, whither on every account he desired me to go. ' We should con- sider then,' he continued, ' how this interval can be turned to the greatest advantage. I wish you to mix as much as is A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. Ill convenient with society. I apprehend that you have, perhaps, hitherto indulged a little too much in lonely habits. 'Young men are apt to get a little abstracted, and occasionally to think that there is something singular in their nature, when the fact is, if they were better acquainted with their fellow creatures, they would find they were mistaken. This is a common error, indeed the commonest. I am not at all surprised that you have fallen into it. -All have. The most practical, business-like men that exist have, many of them, when children, conceived themselves totally dis- qualified to struggle in the world. You may rest assured of this. I could mention many remarkable instances. All persons, when young, are fond of solitude, and when they are beginning to think, are sometimes surprised at their own thoughts. There is nothing to be deplored, scarcely to be feared, in this. It almost always wears off; but sometimes it happens that they have not judicious friends by them to explain, that the habits which they think peculiar are universal, and, if unreasonably indulged, can ultimately only turn them into indolent, insignificant mem- bers of society, and occasion them lasting unhappiness.' I made no reply, but gave up all idea of writing a tale, which was to embrace both Venice and Greece, and which I had been for some days meditating. ' But to enter society with pleasure, Contarini, you must be qualified for it. I think it quite time for you to make yourself master of some accomplishments. Decidedly you should make yourself a good dancer. Without dancing you can never attain a perfectly graceful carriage, which is of the highest importance in life, and should be every man's ambition. You are yet too young fully to comprehend how much in life depends upon manner. Whenever you see a man who is successful in society, try to discover what makes him pleasing, and if possible adopt his system. You should learn to fence. For languages, at \ resent, French 112 CONTAEINI FLEMING: will be sufficient. You speak it fairly; try to speak it elegantly. Read French authors. Read Rochefoucault. The French writers are the finest in the world, for they clear our heads of all ridiculous ideas. Study precision. ' Do not talk too much at present ; do not try to talk. But whenever you speak, speak with self-possession. Speak in a subdued tone, and always look at the person whom you are addressing. Before one can engage in general conver- sation with any effect, there is a certain acquaintance with trifling but amusing subjects which must be first attained. You will soon pick up sufficient by listening and observing. Never argue. In society nothing must be discussed ; give only results. If any person differ from you, bow and turn the conversation. In society never think ; always be on the watch, or you will miss many opportunities and say many disagreeable things. ' Talk to women, talk to women as much as you can. This is the best school. This is the way to gain fluency, because you need not care what you say, and had better not be sensible. They, too, will rally you on many points, and as they are women you will not be offended. Nothing is of so much importance and of so much use to a young man entering life as to be well criticised by women. It is impossible to get rid of those thousand bad habits which we pick up in boyhood, without this supervision. Unfortu- nately you have no sisters. But never be offended if a woman rally you ; encourage her, otherwise you will never be free from your awkwardness or any little oddities, and certainly never learn to dress. ' You ride pretty well, but you had better go through the manege. Every gentleman should be a perfect cavalier. You shall have your own groom and horses, and I wish you to ride regularly every day. ' As you are to be at home for so short a time, and for other reasons, I think it better that you should not have a A PSYCHOLOGICAL ROMANCE. 113 tutor in the house. Parcel out your morning then for your separate masters. Rise early and regularly and read for three hours. Read the Memoirs of the Cardinal de Retz, the Life of Richelieu, everything about Napoleon : read works of that kind. Strelamb shall prepare you a list. Read no history, nothing but biography, for that is life without theory. Then, fence. Talk an hour with your French master, but do not throw the burden of the conver- sation upon him. Give him an account of something. Describe to him the events of yesterday, or give him a detailed account of the constitution. You will have then sufficiently rested yourself for your dancing. And after that ride and amuse yourself as much as you can. Amuse- ment to an observing mind is study.' I pursued the system which my father had pointed out with exactness, and soon with pleasure. I sacredly ob- served my hours of reading, and devoted myself to the study of the lives of what my father considered really great men ; that is to say, men of great energies and violent vo- lition, who look upon their fellow-creatures as mere tools, with which they can build up a pedestal for their solitary statue, and who sacrifice every feeling which should sway humanity, and every high work which genius should really achieve, to the short-sighted gratification of an irrational and outrageous selfism. As for my manners, I flattered myself that they advanced in measure with my mind, al- though I already emulated Napoleon. I soon overcame the fear which attended my first experiments in society, and by scrupulously observing the paternal maxims, I soon became very self-satisfied. I listened to men with a delightful mixture of deference and self-confidence : were they old, and did I differ from them, I contented myself by positively stating my opinion in a subdued voice, and then either turning the subject or turning upon my heel. But as for women, it is astonishing how well I got on. The nervous I 114 CONTAEINI FLEMING: rapidity of my first rattle soon subsided into a continuous flow of easy nonsense. Impertinent and flippant, I was universally hailed an original and a wit. But the most remarkable incident was, that the Baroness and myself became the greatest friends. I was her constant attendant and rehearsed to her flattered ear all my evening perform- ance. She was the person with whom I practised, and as she had a taste in dress I encouraged her opinions. Un- conscious that she was at once my lay figure and my mirror, she loaded me with presents, and announced to all her coterie that I was the most delightful young man of her acquaintance. From all this it may easily be suspected that at the age of fifteen I had unexpectedly become one of the most affected, conceited, and intolerable atoms that ever peopled the sunbeam of society. A few days before I quitted home for the university, I paid a farewell visit to Winter, who was himself on the point of returning to Rome. 'Well, my dear Chevalier,' I said, seizing his hand, and speaking in a voice of affected interest, ' I could not think of leaving town without seeing you. I am off" to-morrow, and you ; you, too, are going. But what a difference ; a Gothic university and immortal Rome ! Pity me, my dear Chevalier,' and I shrugged my shoulders. ' Oh! yes, certainly ; I think you are to be pitied.' ' And how does the great work go on ? Your name is everywhere. I assure you, Prince Besborodko was speaking to me last night of nothing else. By-the-bye, shall you be at the Opera to-night ? ' ' I do not know.' ' Oh ! you must go. I am sorry I have not a box to offer you. But the Baroness's, I am sure, is always at your service.' ' You are vastly kind.' A PSYCHOLOGICAL EOMANCE. 115 ' Tis the most charming opera. I think his masterpiece. That divine air ; I hum it all day. I do indeed. What a genius ! I can bear no one else. Decidedly the greatest composer that ever existed.' ' He is certainly very great, and you are no doubt an excellent judge of his style ; but the air you meant to hum is an introduction, and by Pacini.' ' Is it, indeed ? Ah ! Italy is the land of music. We men of the north must not speak of it.' ' Why is Italy the land of music ? Why not Germany ? ' ' Perhaps music is more cultivated in Germany at present, but do not you think that it is, as it were, more indigenous in Italy ? ' 'No.' As I never argued, I twirled my cane, and asked his opinion of a new casino. ' Ah ! by- the- bye, is it true, Chevalier, that you have at last agreed to paint the Princess Royal ? I tell you what I recommend you seriously to do, most seriously, I assure you most decidedly it is my opinion ; most important thing, indeed, should not be neglected a day. Certainly I should not think of going to Italy without doing it.' ' Well. Well ! ' ' Countess Arnfeldt, Chevalier. By heavens she is divine ! What a neck, and what a hand ! A perfect study.'