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At Lierwick-upon-Tweed, Alnwick, and Newcastle upon- Tyne, in Northumberland; and Seven Dials, London. Cuts by Bewick, etc. Crown 8vo. 6s. Postage 6d. GEOKCiK CRUIKSHANK, Eminent Caricaturist^ 1792 — 1879. C *G A L L E R Y OF COMICALITIES; EMBRACING HUMOROUS SKETCHES V'!.?,. BY THE BROTHERS *-^^ ROBERT and GEORGE CRUIKSHANK, ROBERT SEYMOUR, AND OTHERS. Charles Hindlev, 41, Booksellers' Row, St. Clement Danes, Strand, w.c- 7 2-8'/' THE GALLERY OF COMICALITIES. Most of the " Comicalities " here re-produced in fac simile first appeared in the columns of Bell's LiFii in London and Sporting Chronicle during the years 1827-8 and 9, and caused an unprecedented increase in the weekly sale of that journal. As a painter of Life and Nature, in all their truth and eccentricity, George Cruikshank may be truly said to stand unrivalled, and to be only equalled, even in former times by the inimitable Hogarth. The present Series has been principally selected from " Cruikshank's Illustrations of Time and Phrenology," and his Illustrations to Mr. Wright's " Morn- ings AT Bow Street " and the sequel entitled " More Mornings at Bow Street " — works which are replete with wit and humour. Robert Cruikshank, the elder brother of George Cruik- shank, Lllustrated many books, (!i:c., including Pierce Egan's, " The Finish to the Adventures of Tom, Jerry, and Logic, in their pursuits through Life in and out of London," 1837. Died March 13, 1856. Aged 65 years. Robert Seymour, a graphic humourist was born in London, about the year 1800. He was apprenticed to Mr. Thomas Vaughan, a pattern-drawer in Spitalfields, and his practice in that department of art appears to have given him the facility and accuracy of pencil for which he was afterwards so dis- tinguished. Within a very short period of fulfilling his term of apprenticeship, he commenced, on his own account, as a painter Nl. j in oils, and must have been tolerably expert at that early age, as already in the spring of 1822, we find him exhibiting a picture of some pretensions at the Royal Academy. He executed various other oil paintings about this period, but the more pressing demand on his talents was for drawings on wood, a mode of book illustration then in great vogue. The various illustrated books and i)eriodicals published for the next ten or twelve years bespeak his popularity and industry in that department. Although Seymour's hands were full of commissions for drawing on wood, he was always desirous of practice in a more independent department of art, feeling that the engraver, how- ever competent, frequently failed to communicate the full force of his drawing. He, therefore, determmed — were possible, on etching or engraving his own designs on copper or steel. He was very successful in full length sketches of public characters, and has left us many life-like portraits of members of the Turf and Drama between 1830 and 1836. But of all Seymour's various works his " Humorous Sketches " were his prime favourites, and will best perpetuate his name. They were first published between the years 1834 and 1836, in detached prints at 3d. each, by Mr. Richard Carlisle, of Fleet Street. The entire collection was subsequently engraved on steel, and published in 1838, with letterpress description by Crowquill (Alfred Henry F^orrester), the popular humourist of the day. Figaro in London — the popular predecessor of Punch, edited and published by Gilbert A'Beckett from December 1831 to 1836 — contains nearly 300 woodcuts after Seymour. They were also published separately as "Seymour's Caricature Callery," and after his death were all re-published on six large sheeets, each containing 20 subjects, as " Seymour's Comic Scrap Sheets." Seymour's connection with the publication and illustration of the now famous Pickwick Papers is well known to the reading world by the printed statement of Mrs. Seymour, and Charles Dickens' own account of the origin of the Pickwick Papers, to need repetition. Of TRF ^NIVEBSITY GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. L ILLUSTRATIONS OF THE D^';A-M;A. " WHERE SHALL I DINE." /\. Cruikshank. Where shall I dine ? Would I could tell, For, hungry, faint, and weary, It is to me, I know full well. An all-important query. Thou Man of Flank ! a cut of thine Would silence hunger's call ; But a Friend's, cut alas ! is mine, " The unkindest cut of all." O for a herring, dainty fish ! Or tender lambkin's fry ; But as in vain for meat I wish, 'Tis MEET that I should sigh. Ere by the freaks of Fortune floor'd. Such was my former luck. That under many a friendly board My trotters I could tuck. Now, though at dining hour I go, From house to house I roam. My rap too well the servants know. And " Master's not at home." 'Tis getting cold, and wet, and dark. To fate I must resign ; Duke Humphrey calls me to the Park, And with his Grace Fll dine. GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. II. ILLUSTRATIONS OF THE DRAMA " THE PILOT." R. Cruiksliank. Thou, guardian Pilot of the night, One favour we would ax — Tell us, old Cock, and tell us right, Where we can get some Max ? We need the skilful pilot's aid Amid the billows' roar, And pilots still I find, old Blade, Are handy lads ashore. Then steer us for a friendly port And keep the wessel steady. And you shall have a dram of short — In brandy, rum, or Deady. With bread and cheese I'll stow your hold ; I likes a hearty grubber ; But, shiver me, it's getting cold, So take the helm, you lubber. Come, Poll, my buxom wench make sail, I'm one as never fears man, To reach our port we cannot fail With such an able steersman. Then come, old Boy, there's nought to pay. For I will be your banker ; Nor do I care how long you stay Wherever we cast anchor. B 2 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. III. ILLUSTRATIONS OF THE DRAMA. " IS HK JKALOUS ?" " O fly with me, my lady tair — I love and I adore you ; Henceforth the heart and fortune share Of him wlio kneels before you. " Then listen to thy lover's vows, Nor of vain scruples tell us ; Why care a pin about your spouse — Confound him ! — is he jealous? " " Go, get you gone, you naughty man, Nor dare attempt my virtue ; I hide my blushes with my fan, Yet I've no wish to hurt 30U." Then, gay Lothario ! persevere- Still urge thy passion brisker ; Nor dread an interloper here, Thou man of bushy whisker ! If, armed with poker and with pop, Poor Spouse should be so rude now As at this moment in to drop, Faith ! wouldn't he intrude now ? O, married dames ! when lovers' sighs Steal softly on your ear. Shun the temptation, if you're wise — The Devil's always near. GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. IV. ILLUSTRATIONS OF THE DRAMA. " MACIiETH." Ji was then the order of the age ; She thought they should, like Fanny Kemble, go, Or, like the Elephant, upon the sta^Jic. Here Andrew differ'd from his quiet spouse. Mild as she was, and gentle as he thought her ; Said he " The steam as every one allows, Impels one far more quickly through i\\e7vaterJ' " But if the boiler burst, which much I fear, Then we, and all the rest, in air are blown." Quoth Andrew," No : if that should hap, my dear ; Instead of going up we should go doivii." " Really, my love," said Ann, " with joke and fun You draw such scenes as surely never man drew , And are in fact so merry with your fun. That I should take you for a Merry Andrew.'' 55 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES— No. LII. ANDREW AND HIS SPOUSE j*in Aquatic Excursion by Sfeam and Boal ! It bnip Now by the water side — a noted part — A tavern stands, which men have christen'd " Ship," And hence 'twas needful that our friends should start, The following day, for their intended trip. Therefore, when Sol had risen, so had they For they were early, like the sun, and steady : And when the Steam-boat came beside the quay, Andrew, his luggage, and his wife, were ready. The hour had now arrived, and all was life : The waiter said \.\\'i packet was afloat; The bills were paid, and Andrew and his wife Now left the SJiip, and hastened to the boat. They'd no idea of such a crowd i'fecks ! When they embarked, for no one had yet told 'em ; There were three hundred people on the decks. The cabin and the hold would hardly hold 'em. The vessel started soon, — her every chink Filled up with luggage, women, boys and men ; Swiftly she cut the spray, you cannot think What whey (way) she made upon the water then. Ah, Master Andrew ! you could not divine The woe of sailing when the wind's not aft ; Or you'd have been more crafty, I opine, Than ever to have entered such a craft. 56 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES— No. LIII. ANDREW AND HIS SPOUSE. An Aquatic Excursion by Steam and Boat! 'Twas summer, yet the wind was passing cool ; The Captain frown'd, and looked exceeding cross ; The vessel, like some boys I knew at school, Was playing with the waves at J>Uc/i and toss. There was a dandy there — you scarce could tell It was a wig he wore ; the beau did right To go to Truefit's, for it fitted well, All Truefit's wigs, I'm told, fit true and tight. Two men were arguing, with wooden legs. No doubt each thought the other was mistaken ; The cabin boy let fall a plate of eggs And broke them all, although he saved his bacon. There were some ladies as it often haps. Both plebeian and patrician— high and low — And Andrew thought that many set their caps At the young men, in hopes to catch a beau There were some butcher's daughters, wondrous proud Of their sweet persons ! — pride I must_condemn — Who once or twice were heard to say aloud, That nothing in the ship was meet for them. Now the good vessel, keeping on her way. Had one effect on Andrew and his wife ; Who were, not sick to death, as some would say — But sick enough to make them sick of life. 57 Q GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LIV. ANDREW AND HIS SPOUSE An Aquatic Excursion by Steam and Boat ! All this to Andrew and his Spouse, I trow, Was noveliy— and yet it had no charms, For both, before the night, were heard to vow They wished they had not left the Mason's Arms. Close to the rails they stood — and you might see Their notions of delight began to waver ; When Andrew's wife fell over in the sea, And might have drown'd ; but Andrew shouted " Save her !' Perhaps you think he jumped into the water; No, gentle reader, no ; that would not do : You might have done so for a wife or daughter, 'Qwi you are otie, :md. yoji and Andrew, iivo. But some one seeing that he was no lover Of aught save eating, drinking, and his life, Came close behind the man and pushed him over. With " Don't you see, you brute, go save your wife." Just at the time a little vessel passed, (Andrew had caught his wife) — it was the Percy; The captain thought it best to put about, And take them in, for they were crying mercy ! The Stca?n-boat kept her way, although the wind was bad, Margate they made, the crew cried " That's your sort !" The band struck up a tune, the rest were glad As tipplers would be, to get at the Fort. But Andrew and Spouse, just as they were About to sink, and thought that they were undone, Got safe on board the Percy — wind was fair. And the tight little boat, was on its way to London. 58 Q 2 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. LV. ANDREW AND HIS SPOUSE An Aquatic Excursion by Steam and Boat! She soon arrived, of time there was no loss, The sailors rowed them quickly to the land And now, five miles at least from Charing Cross, Stood Andrew and his Spouse upon the Strand, They hastened home, for home had many charms ; Thither they went, and none could well go faster \ For Andrew knew full well the Mason's Arms Were always open to receive their master. They'd seen enough of sea ; and their immersion In the sail-sea wave had pickled them so well, They never made another sea excursion ; And therefore j'^?^ see ! I've but little more to tell. From that day forth, when Andrew and his wife Disputed, which was often it would seem. His spouse replied, " Remember, pray, my life, That 'tis not always best to go by Steam !" My tale is done, — about a week ago When passing through the City, I heard tell That " Andrew and his Spouse " were dead, and so Bow bcU was tolling for this Bean and Belle. MORAL. Hereafter then, when'er we need advice About a journey to the East or West ; We must obey our spouses in a trice. And alivays do what they imagine best. 59 ^ GALLERY OF COMICALITIES-No. LVL " BEHIND TIME." " Procrastination is the Thief of Time." ''^ Coach, Sir ! Lord love your soul, the coach has been gone these three quarters of an hour ; Ws the most regglarest coach as t'Sy and always starts to a minute !" " You dont say so ! Lawks ! vot a precious row my vife vill kick up I Shes a coming arter me as fast as she can trot !" George Cruikshank's " Illustrations of Time.^' 60 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES. -No. LVII. "HARD TIMES." MACADAMITES. '* I say^ Shuffleton, these d — d Overseers pay no respect to Persons /" " iVb, Doctor, nor to Parsons either T George Cruikshamk's " Illustrations of Tune.''' \^ 6t GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. LVIIL "TERM TIME." "^1 THE LAWYER AND HIS CLIENTS " Gentlemen, it was a very fine Oyster, itideed ! The Court awards you a shell each /" George Cruikshank's " Illitstrations of Time.'^ 62 R 2 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. LIX. "TIME COME!" TIME CALLED, " Time / Bring him iip, Tom ! Jack cati't stand another round I" " JVith a hook ! I'm blou^d if he hdnt ' cut his stick I ' " ^'' A guinea to a shilling on Jack! Titne's up! If s all over ! Jack's won the day I Fm blest if we sha?it all be lagged T George Cruikshank's ^^Illustrations of TimeJ'^ 63 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES. -No. LX. "TAKING TIME BY THE FORE-LOCK." " LONDON CONVEYANCERS." " / say, Bill, Vve got his ticker : pull his precious nob offT "Fm sniggered if I dont f George Cruikshank's '■^ Illustrations of Time ^ 64 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES. -No. LXI. "PUDDING TIME." " A LITTLE TOO LATE." " Ha^ Snooks, we had given you up altogether /" " I thought you said four o'clock, my dear fellow f *' So / did^ but it is now five.'" " Yes, but four ahvays means five '^ " Not with those who tell the truth, and as I am one of that sort, you will know I mean what I say in future; but sit down ^better late than never.' — Mary bring thefragmetits," George Ckuikshank's '•'■ Ilhisiratiom of Time.'''' (>$ U i- GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.- No. LXII. ''WASTE OF TIME.." LABOUR IN VAIN. " Scrnh a7oay, Jenny I I'll 7varrant wc get the dirty toad white r " O, Missee ! you}- water so dam hot, you scald poor Sambo !" '■'■ Drat your black carcase ! well make somcthi?ig of you at last, if we skin you ! Go it, Molly I rub his life time out I George Cruikshaxk's " Illustrations of Time. Of 66 S 2 Jk GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LXIII. ''CHRISTMAS TIMES. " BOXING DAY !" ■Vou arnU the rigglar Dustman, hloiv ye I For a farden Vd break your blessed conk /" /';// as sood a Dustman as you any day in the veek^ my tulip /" George Cruikshank's " Illustrations of TimeP 67 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. LXIV. THE QUEAN WOT CLAIMS THE BREECHES. G. C. The young and old, the short and tall, In poverty or riches ; One common aim prevails with all — 'Tis who shall wear the breeches ! This lovely, winning creature scan, To wives a bright example ! Mark on the boasted " Rights of Man," How she presumes to trample, Poor Henpeck ! what shall shield you now, In fortune's fickle weather, If you surrender to your frow The covering of your nether ? Reduced by this ignoble deed, To petticoats' stern sway ; To play the tyrant is her creed. And yours is to obey. Farewell, poor fellow— by the bye. To keep her system placid. Suppose you tip her, on the sly, A little prussic acid. A very moderate dose will do, To make her calm and quiet : And, if you wish to tame that shrew. Make haste, my boy, and try it. George Ckuikshank's "■ Mornings ai Boxv Street. '^ 68 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES. -No. LXV. SUMMARY DIVORCE. G. C. Now ponder well, ye tender wives, As you would shun disasters, And as you wish for peaceful lives, Thwart not your lords and masters. If late from home they chance to stop, Avoid all vain conjectures ; And, if they've had a little drop, Refrain from curtain lectures. A scolding tongue will ne'er reclaim A man from idle courses ; But often leads to grief and shame, And Summary Divorces. These evils flow from angry words — Then try not such expedients ; Besides, you know, you owe your lords Love, honour, and obedience ! Ah ! tell us, Dame, for what offence Your Spouse, in all his glory. Is using such strong arguments, And " a posteriori." What have you said or done, alas ! Or what have you neglected ? That thus by speedy habeas, You're forcibly ejected. George Cruikshank's " Mornm^qs at Bav Sirccty 69 T GALLERY OF COMICALITIES. -No. LXVI. "BARRING A BAD CUSTOMER; OR, A SCORE REHIND !" Boniface : " Mizzle, you ivarmint, you aii t paid your old scoj-e , No more chalk here ! — so take that ! " Cherry Ripe : " Afy eye, 7C'hat a toucher f" George Cruikshan'k's ^' Momitigs at Bcnv Street.'"' 70 T 2 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LXVII. "TAKING THE LAW IN HER OWN HANDS ; OR, SERVING AN EJECTMENT ON A TROUBLESOME TENANT. " Covu alo'ig, you old willain ; fll teach you to be going arter the wenches ; Vll shew you laho loears the breeches you — /" George Ckuikshank's " Mort Mornings at Emu Street." 71 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LXVIII. "THE THIMBLE RIG; OR, HOW TO BONNET A FLAT !" " Noto^ then, my jolly Sportsman ! I've got more money than the Parson of the parish ! Those as don't play can't vin and those as are here arn't there ! I'd hould any of you, from a tanner to a soverin, or ten, as you don't tell ivhich thimble the pea is under" ''It's there, Sit"— ''I barr tellings"— 'Til go it again."—" Vat you dont see don't look at, and zvhat you do see dont tell. I'll hould you a soverin, Sir, that you don't tell me vitch tJiimble the pea is under:'—" Lay liim, Sir {in a whisper) ; it's under the middle un I'll go you halves."— '^ Lay him another; that's right."— I'm bloiv'd but toe ve lost: who'd a thought it /"—Smack goes the flat's hat over his eyes ; exit the confederates with a loud laugh. George Cruikshank's '• More Mornings at Boio Street.'" 72 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. LXIX. " FLYING DUSTMEN." " The Dustman's cart offends thy clothes and eyes, When through the street a cloud of ashes flies."— Gay. '' The Spectre, learning, physic must, All follow these, and come to dust." Go it, Bob.' — pull away 1 — here's the Traps/ — cut away, my kidi/y, good luik to you! — Kifn aup, Neddy j — kirn aup ! — bloiv you, kirn aup I— That's the ticket! George Cruikshank's " More Mornings at Boiv Street,'' 73 V GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LXX. "THE APPROACH OF CHRISTMAS." " VENERATION — PRIZE BEEF. '•' m// to be sure, that is a picture / I must have a sirloin for Christmas-day. It warms the cockles of ones heart to think of it ./" George Cruikshank's '' Illustraiious of Phrenology.'" 74 U 2 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LXXI. "COLOUR !— FORM !— FIGURE !' George Cruikshank's ^^Illustrations of Phrenology. GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. LXXIL " COMB ATIVEN ESS." BILLINGSGATE. ^'Vou be smothered^ you old Brimstome I— barring Vm a thief ^ and fond of the men, what can you say to my prejudiced' ''Get out you wagabondl get out, you circumwenting old fish-fag!" Geokge Ckuikshank's " Illustrations of Phrenology:'' 76 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES. -No. LXXIII. SYMPTOMS OF DRAWING :- [Vii'A^I^F^l'^'^ AtMs Eisa':! ^^j^W^^^^fl:^j-'E:^l- " A TRUCK — A TOOTH — A BOTTLE OF BLACK STRAP — AND A POT OF HEAVY. fl GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LXXIV. THE LOBSTERS' CLAUSE; OR, THE NEW POLICE BILL Now, then, Sir, I'll trouble you to move on '. I sing, I sing, of the new bill, sir, That to the people seems a pill, sir. And shortly I'll relate its clauses. That you may know what the police law is. First and foremost, in a straight line running, For fifteen miles it will stop your funning, From Charing Cross, which ever way you turn, sir. If you infringe, your fingers you'll burn, sir. Oh, dear, oh. dear ! they're better off in Greece, sir, Free from this Metropolitan New Police, sir. All the people who used to show, sir. Traps on the pavement, will find it no go, sir, And now within their shop or dwelling, Their odd- cum- shorts they must be selling, If maids after eight their mats should beat, sir, At the treadmill they'll have a treat. And, if little boys roll hoops, or fly kites, sir, They'll be lock'd up seven days and nights, sir. Oh, dear, &c. 78 X 2 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LXXV. TWELFTH DAY IN LONDON; PAYING FOR A PEEP. R.C. 'TWELFTH DAY. Such are the scenes, that, at the front and the side Of the Twelfth-Cake-Shops, scatter wild dismay ; As up the slipp'ry curb, or pavement wide, We seek the pastrycooks, to keep Twelfth day ; While ladies stand aghast, in speechless trance. Look round — dare not go back — and yet dare not advance. Hone's '■'Everv-Day Book.' 79 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LXXVI. BEFORE AND AFTER MARRIAGE; OR, RINGING THE CHANGES. {mi " Say but the word., my dear Susan, and youWe mine for ever; we shall be as happy as the day is long! " " Out d my sight, you viliian / lavish I had never seen your Ugly mug^you have been the curse of my life/" GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LXXVII. AN OSTLER, ALIAS OATSTEALER; OR, A HINT TO TRAVELLERS. Traveller : " Bavi/ig made myself comfortable, I must now , look to my jiag^for these ostlers are sorry dogs.'" Ostler : " Aye, you may look, old Bald-face ; but as you can't tell no tales, why, its better you should go without your feed than I without my pot.'' 8i GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. LXXVIIL MUSIC HATH CHARMS TO SOOTH THE SAVAGE BREAST. " / love music, and I don't see ivJiy I shoiddu't enjoy myself— besides its a charity to my sick neighbour : it ivill soothe him to a gentle slumber ! " " Oh, dear ! oh, dear — luas ever poor devil so tortured ! — tJiat infernal noise will be the death of me ! ' ' 82 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. LXXIX. BULLS AND NO JOKES; OR, GALLANTRY ON THE GALLOP. " Johnny, you wretch ! yoiire not going to leave me here tvith these 'orned Jianiniah ? For the love you bear vie, come back and help me over! " " I'm blessed if I do !— ' mtmbcr one ' is the first laiv of nature, so here goes ! Come along Jowlcr ! " 83 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES. -No. LXXX. DR. BOLUS, OR THE LAST PILL. Throw physic to the dogs .-—I'll none of it. 5s^^i^ 'Tivill DO for yojt, my good friend^it is an infallible remedy for all diseases I " 84 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-NO. LXXXL LONDON IN THE DOG DAYS. .::.::.:.. fef ^ ^^^ " HuUoa ! take care of that ere dog, Pin blowd if he artit as mad as a March hare ! He's bolted ivith his mistress s kittle, and Fm splashed if he arnt got the IIYDRA- PIIOBIA, or he ivoiddii t go past the pump in such a Jiurry." H GALLERY OF COMICALITIES- No. LXXXII. PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE! " IV/iy, I say, Popjoy, ha'jit you had a bite all day ? " Nor 86 Z 2 X GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.- No. LXXXIII SEASONABLE AMUSEMENTS; OR, "SPORTING A TOE" ON THE ICE. Sport that wrinkled care derides, And laughter holding both his sides. Come and trip it as you go, On the light fantastic toe. Milton's "■ V Alle/ii// work— xhtit loose they find a screw, sir, Such novelties, as Pat would say, of oM they never knew, sir. Bow, wow, &c. Now is the time for a sly trip to the Moon, sir, Tiiere's a new Rail Road just made througli f/ic Sky, Or if you prefer it, we have ■^ prime Balloon, sir, In which you can ascend with me up sky high. TraveUing the rage is — in the tying of a sandal, We take our tea in Tartary, or chop at Coiomamie/, Then when blazing hot we get with Indians gums and spices, We take a stroil towards tlie Pole, and cool ourselves 7(. THE GAMBLERS PROGRESS — STEP THE FOURTH. O, for a Fogo's Muse to sing The glories of the Boxing Ring — Where Peer and Prig, and Sweep and Swell, Mix in the motley group pell-mell : A scene of frolic, row, and danger, Where honesty is ofi a stranger ; For doubtful are the chances now Of triumph to the best man's brow. With equal grief and shame we tell it, 'Tis " How much do ye ax to sell it ?" O, for the fighting days of old, When men were neither bought nor sold ; When victory was the aim alone, And fighting crosses all unknown. Amid the rabble monkey crew, See Pug, our hero, full in view — His brain with bruising science stored. Up to each move upon the board ; How fluently he prates of flooring, Tapping the claret, fibbing, boring — Of Chancery-suits and body-battering. Ogles sew'd up, and ivories chattering. Eager to bet — a Sharper now Has got our hopeful Sprig in tow — Though Mentor, to his pupil true, Hints pretty plainly its a do. " I'll book my man to win for sartin — Come, three to one on Bill, at starting ? " Though Bill is certainly the strongest. Perhaps Jack's wind may last the longest. 142 2 o GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. CXXXIX. MONKEYAN A." THE GAMBLERS PROGRESS. — STEP THE FIF'JH. Hurrah for Epsom ! Mount your prads, And start away, like knowing lads, To join the swarms of smihng faces That throng delighted to the races. O, what a scene of joy and jolity, Of prancing, capering,, and frivolity ! Where many a swell whose means are scanty, Bestrides his balter'd Rosinante — Which, proud of such illustrious backers, Hails a short respite from the knackers. Go it ! my heroes ! man or monkey Mounted on blood, or hack, or donkey. Know many a youth, of spirit gay, Shall rue the racing of this day. And, mourning loss of cash and leather, Curse Oaks and Derby Stakes together. Where all the springs of fashion gay. Can Master Pug be absent ? No. Still under Mentor's kind protection. He presses forward to perfection — With the top Coves can prate with spirit Of all their racers and their merit ; Their action, colour, age, and bottom, Where they were foal'd, and who begot'em : Can bet and hedge, make sure to win. And take a well fled'g Greenhorn in. Mentor, at distance, takes his seat. Intently gazing on the heat ; Intending wisely, if he can, To line his purse, and fleece his man. 143 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. CXL. MONKE YAN A." □"NIVERSIT THE gambler's progress. — STEP THE SIXTH. Where are the Dashers of the Land Who throng'd the Race Course "four-in-hand?' The splendid trappings— bang-up team — Have all departed hke a dream, And Britzska, Landau, One-horse Shay, Are now the order of the day. See the Eilwagen skims along, The wonder of a gazing throng, Who hail the Royal importation, A luxury to a lazy nation ! — Here on a sofa you may share Sweet converse with a favourite fair. Or snugly when it suits the whim, Sloth may stretch out the lazy limb — The curtains of the carriage close, And sink delighted to repose — For such enjoyment thanks are due, O, Princely Cumberland ! to you. Long may you rest your noble head On this transcendent Carriage-bed ! But to our Hero — Pug, tlie Swell, Has done the flats at Epsom well ; And as you see, in tii)-toe twig, Now sports his lady and his gig ; No guardian Mentor now is near To breathe sage counsel in his ear ; For when a Lady's in the case Each Mentor's presence must give place. In truth he needs no aid of friend To prompt him now his gains to spend. 144 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.-No. CXLL MONKEY AN A.' THE GAMP.LERS PROGRESS. —STKP THE SEVENTH. Ah Pug ! tho' fortune now has smil'd, And mark'd you for a favourite child, Too many, by those smiles betray'd ; Have prov'd her but a fickle jade ; And like the meteor of the night. Misleading with a treacherous light. Irksome the task to trace in verse 'l"he Gamester's course from had to worse : That course of vice may long endure. But still the termination's sure. What is the upshot of the game ? Ruin — remorse — disgrace — and shame. Behold our Hero — mark him well, The inmate of a modern Hell ; Where Croupier every snare hath set, To catch all fish that come to net ; Tho' of the tribes that sink or swim, The Gold and Silver Fish for him. Now Pug, call Fortune to your aid, The colour's black — the Game is made ; 'I'rente un — Red wins — a hardish smack ! You laid that hundred. Pug, on black ; Don't let that trifle give you trouble. Try Black once more, and put down double. Red wins again — Ah sound of dread ! Well now you'll have a run on Red ; Then change the colour if you will — But doom'd to be unlucky still. You'll persevere with store diminish'd. Till YOUR OWN GAiNiE at length is finish'd ; 145 2 p GALLERY OF COMICALITIES,— No. CXLII. "M ONKEY AN A." i THE GAMULER S PROGRESS. — STEP THE EIGHTH. 'Tis even so — the die is cast, And, Pug ! your golden dreams have pass'd — Well may you mourn the luckless hour You plac'd yourself in Mentor's power — The knowing practices he taught you ; To a bad winding up have brought you, Stripp'd of your gains, you now, too late. Distracted, curse your bitter fate, And gnash your teeth, and grasp \our hair, In all the raving of despair. How shall such anguish be appeas'd ? How can we heal a mind diseas'd? Is there no source of comfort? None. No friend to soothe your mind ? Not one. Mentor, of course, has little claim To be distinguished by the name ; Who with unruffled phyz is viewing His pupil's rage and utter ruin ; Eyes him with self-complacent shrug, And thus addresses hapless Pug : — " This is a devilish fine cigar — Why, what a shocking judge you are ! I never knew you play so bad — I thought you were not to ue had ; 'Tis strange, indeed, it never struck ye, When you play high, you're never lucky. Besides, you play'd too long on Red ; Didn't you see me shake my head? The money was your own, no doubt. And handsomely they've cleaned you out. 146 2 p 2 GALLERY OF COMICALITIES.— No. CXLIII. "MONKEY AN A." THE GAMBLERS PROGRESS. STEP THE NINTHr " Last scene of all, " That ends this strange eventful story." The Gaming Race at length is run And darkness shrouds the evening sun ; Reproach, Remorse, are now in vain — That sun may never rise again ! Now poverty, distress, disgrace, Stare ghastly in the victim's face : The heartless shrug, the cut direct, And bitter scorn and cold neglect ? — Those glittering hopes so fondly cherished, In one ill-omen'd night have perish'd. And Fate, in midnight's deepest gloom, Have veil'd our wretched Hero's doom — While Suicide is hovering near, To put her seal on Pug's career. — Stay thy rash hand ! ere to that hour From which no Traveller can return. All stain'd with sin, unfit to die, Unsummon'd you presume to fly ! — The tube is rais'd, the die is cast — Another moment is the last. But, ere the awful scene is clos'd, A guardian hand hath interpos'd ; And in this time of utmost need, See Mentor rush to stay the deed, And eagerly his arm extend To snatch from death his wretched friend. Mentor, tliis act shall well atone For many an error of thine own. 147 OF THE UNIVERSITT i\^ UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA LIBRARY BERKELEY , Jletum to desk from which borrowed. This book is DUE on the last date stamped below. 16lun'4'. ocTSomaij JAW 2 1 1968 3 7 REC'D M 7'66-llftW LOAN DEPT. APR19I96S3 3 mi2» R9$u,nsJ by (^AY 2 ^) 1979 !&anJa Cruz JitnoY. BEC.WR. WW 2 9 tSTS JUL 3 01988 LD 21-100TO-9,'48iB399sl6)476 U.C. BERKELtV UBBABIES I BDD3Q123fc.a ^ZS'jZj ■ THE UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA LIBRARY i