^^% ^ ^^S^"^' ILLUSTRATIONS of STERNE: with OTHER ESSAYS AND VERSES. BY JOHN FERRIAR, M, D. SECOND EDITION. VOL. I. Peace be with the soul of that charitable and cour- teous Author, who, for the common benefit of his fellow -authors, introduced the ingenious way of Miscellaneous Writing ! Shaftesbury. LONDON : Printed FOB CADELL AND DAVIES; BY J. AND J. HADDOCK, HORSE-MARKET, WARRINGTON. 1812. ; /:v^:i..i;\: r< GEORGE PHILIPS, ES^. V i\ -11 SEDGLEY, NEAR MANCHESTER. Vou must forgive me, my dear friend, ^ for having gratified, without your partici" ^ pation, a wish which I have long entertain- ed, to dedicate these volumes to you. This, indeed, is the only part of the work on which your judgment has not been consulted, , i Within the circle oj our acquaintance, no > account of the motives jor this dedication will he demanded : to the public let me say, that it is a tribute due, on my part, to a ^ long-tried and perfect friendship, cemented Y by the love of letters, and destined, I trust, -) never to admit interruption or decay. I am, most truly and faithfully your* s, THE AUTHOR. MOSLEY-STREET, Jan. 10th, 1812. Viii PREFACE. fully protected. Mean time, the friend- less and solitary composer of his own productions stands trembling at the gate, or listens to his sentence of condemna- tion, from a [judge whq has scarcely deigned to examine his cause. Even the migiity talents of Bentley sustained' a temporary injustice, in the publioe-stimation, from this cause, during the cocrtroyersyrespecting the Epistles of? Phalariijc !Yet^ in iiis time,- the field: o^, literary warfare was more openly; con- tested, than at present. No periodical' depredators, under the disguise of critics, then infested the highways of knowledge, to attack the peaceable traveller, and to exult in the dismay which their assault might. occasion^ .But Prejudice, liowcver \rilc, rules the destiny of genius, and her most unjust decrees have sometimes been revetTsed, only by late postericy. viHt is another disadvantage of original composition, that when it sucoeeds in the first instance, it create?, somewhere, a strenugus opposition. The triumph o\' an PREFACE.; ix- author, like that of a Roman conqueror, j is celebrated by sarcasms and libels, as well ; as by applause and pomp. Nothing can , be more just than Fontenelle's t?pigram on this subject. ii>fuaa,uyj^i-lai ia.^a'civs% Dans la lice ou tu vas courir :-['^^|i-^ j^^-^ Songe un peu combien tu hazSitdJ^^^H 6B H0nik II faut avec courage egalement oflVir, j|-. j o^|j 'jj-. Et ton front aux lauriers, et ton nez aux nazardes. What must be the surprize of a writer, emerging from his peaceful cabinet to some degree of reputation, to find that he has created himself bitter enemies, among persons totally unknown to him, simply by obtaining the applause of others ! Even the voice of fame seldom reaches the ear of the solitary, original writer-' distinctly; it is difficult for him to dis-- tinguish the silence of approbation from that of neglect. But the bustling, cla- morous cabal sometimes pass off their interested noise for the acclamations of the public. What remains, then, for the author of his own book ? The pleasure xi PREEAGB/1 of. composition; the cx)nsciousness; oiV some talent; and the Jibcrly of reading- and pi-aising-onlythejbbstf writers. -i 9ji Many curiouS' aricodotcs miglit bflc? given, of literary manufacturenj; for Oc l)ook generally goes through as many hands as a pin^ before publication*, One of the most successful compositions of this kind was the Turkish Spy, which still retains. a considerable degree of. popu- larity. Dunton says, it was ai compilar* tion, conducted by Nat. Cmuch^. wtbos was one of that voluminGufe^, and^opuleutf body! of authors* the London booksellersi. Of the same kind was d^e Athenian Oracle, projected and executed by Dun*- ton himself, andi some of his, authoKs ; but much indebted hn its success,. to liiaj own fluency im writing bad) proae,; anti; esxccrable versei; These mingledl Qomr jHisitions generally betray themselvies, by the discordant nature of thoii: materials. Tlie small sprigiof gpld^. wiiieh aUmcied the first notice, of the obsenei;,, quiGkd)t- PREFACE. 'oii 'taprcs'bif, and disappears in (tbe chinks /aid crannies of barren rocks. - But no where is the original author iiuore. puzzled, than in writing his own preface. This is usually supplied, like rithe prologue to a play, by some obliging :feiend. Nor is it discreditable to acknow- : ictlgetliisdiffiejilty, since even Cervantes %;owns, that he had more trouble jn coni- . jpi)sing his preface, than bis : immortal ^aworki itself.* Yet a preface is still rc- f (jired, (like tbe obeisance of the last \c:eiii.ury, t on , entering a room,) however n^jeJiJiarroaay bei tbe subject, or, howjever tgi^y f^evwork. / jTood -hI) oi ^il rBehpld, then, worthy reader, a.pre- jjf^ce to this .smajl book. Had it been j.<>oinposed by some other hand than mine, it might have possessed superior claims to attention ; but I could then have * Porque te se decir, que aunque me costo algun trabajo componerla, ninguno tuve por mayor que hacer esta prefacion que vas leyendo. Muchas veces tome la pluma para- escribilla, y muchas la dexe por no saber lo que escribiria, Prologo del Quixote, >^n PREFACE. <3erm?d no satisfaction from public appro- bation. For 1 bave seen reason to believe, ibat lame, acquired by appropriating tbe r.iabours of others, neither improves tlie liead nor the heart of the usurper.iiV>K| The preface was formerly a supplication to the reader, for mercy and favour, some- what in the style of Bayes's prologue : of late, it has rather consisted of an ex- planation of the author's claims to respect, and a declaration of his literary alliances, under colour of acknowledgements to his friends. My own opinion has always been, that it ought to bear some relation to the book which it is designed to intro- duce; and 353 nothing can be more mis- cellaneous than my volumes, I trust it will not be thought irrelevant, if the preface should partake of tJieir nature. CONTENTS. Page. Illustrations of Sterne 17 Chapter ! Probable origin of Stemes's ludi- crous writings. General account of the nature of the ludicrous. Why the sixteenth century produced many authors of this class - - 19 Chapter II. Ludicrous writers, from whom Stenie probably took general ideas, or particular passages Rabelais Beroalde D'Aubigne' Bouchet Bruscambille Scarron- Swift Ga- briel John -_ 4,Q Chapter III. Sketches of ludicrous writers, of the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries 75 Chapter IV. Other writers imitated by Sterne 'Burton Bacon Blount Montaigne Bi- shop Hall 82 Chapter V. Of the personages of Tristram Shandy, Anecdotes of Dr. Slop 129 Chapter VI. Mr. Shandy's hypothesis of noses explained Taliacotius-^ Stories of long noses Coincidence between Vigneul-Marville and Lavater Opinions cf Garmann Riolan Beddoes Segar's point of honour concerning the nose -------------.----.--- 14^ ,^ ktt .jV.'^'O ,r^;\SU . ^'<- V. >; r.j-. OiilMxi .11 lalii.'^fl J' \*i' ^.y -J - V5a\3. va-^n ntv.tj. - m\oV. \sV'.v. :!. laJqiJi y>^iv- J^.-. v...:. iSViO'iX .7i fV'^r. i J .X >iVA MOV^ \^ -A-l C\r.i\ ......... . -xi.^i^ -y^^ ILLUSTRATIONS of STERNE. Vol. I. B Sterne, for whose sake I plod thro' miry ways Of antic wit, and (juibbling mazes drear. Let not tliy shade malignant censure fear, Tho' aught of borrow 'd mirth my search betrays. Long slept that mirth in dust of ancient days, (Erewhilc to Guise, or wanton Valois dear) Till wak'd by thee in Skelton's joyous pile. She flung on Tristram her capricious rays. But the quick tear, that checks our wond'ring imile. In sudden pause, or unexpected story. Owns thy true maBt'ry ; and Le Fevre's woes, Maria's wand'rings, and the P7'is%ier's throes Fix thee conspicuous on the shrine of glory. ILLUSTRATIONS, &c. CHAPTER I. Probable origin of Siemens ludicrous writings. General account of the nature of the ludicrous. Why the sixteenth century produced many authors of this class. AT sometimes happens, in literary pur- suits, as in the conduct of life, that par- ticular attachments grow upon us by im- perceptible degrees, and by a succession of attentions, trifling in themselves, tliough important in their consequences. When I published some desultory remarks on the writings of Sterne, many years ago, having told all that I knew, I had no intention to resume the subject. But after B 2 20 ILLUSTRATIONS an enquiry has been successfully begun, facts appear to offer themselves of then* own accord to the Investigator. Materials have encrCasecl on my hands, from a few casual notes and references, to the size of a formal treatise : I trust it will be found, however, that I have had sufficient dis- cretion not to bestow all my tediousness on the public. When the first volumes of Tristram Shandy appeared, they excited almost as much perplexity as admiration. The feeling, the wit, and reading which they displayed were sufficiently relished, but the w ild digressions, the abruptness of the narratives and discussions, and the per- petual recurrence to obsolete notions in philosophy, gave them more the air of a collection of fragments, than of a regular work. Most of the waiters from whom Sterne drew the general ideas, and many of the peculiarities of his book, were then forgotten. Rabelais was the only French wit of the sixteenth century, who was OF STERNE. 21 generally read, and from his obscurity, it would have been vain to have expected any illustration of a modern v^^ritcr. Readers are often inclined to regard with veneration, what they do not under- stand. They suppose a work to be deep, in proportion to its darkness, and give the author credit for recondite learning, in many passages, where his incapacity, or his carelessness, have prevented him from explaining himself with clearness. It was not the business of Sterne to un- deceive those, who considered his Tris- tram as a work of unfathomable know- iedge. He had read with avidity the ludicrous writers, who flourished under the last princes of the race of Valois, and the first of the Bourbons. They were at once courtiers, men of wit, and, some of them, profound scholars. They offered to a mind full of sensibility, and alive to every impression of curiosity and voluptuous- ness, the private history of an age, in B 3 22 ILLUSTRATIONS which every class of readers feels a deep interest; in which the heroic spirit of chivalry seemed to be tempered by let- ters, and the continued conflict of power- ful and intrepid minds prpduced memo- rabic changes, in religion, in politics, and philosophy. They shewed, to a keen observer of the passions, the secret movements, which directed the splendid scenes beheld with astonishment by Eu- rope. They exhibited statesmen and heroes drowning their country in blood, for the favours of a mistress, or a quarrel at a ball ; and veiling under the shew of patriotism, or religious zeal, the meanest and most criminal motives. VVhile he was tempted to imitate their productions, the dormant reputation of most of these authors seemed to invite him to a secret treasure of learning, wit, and ridicule. To the facility of these acquisitions, we pro- bably owe much of the gaiety of Sterne. His imagination, untamed by previous labour, and unsated by a long acquaint*- OF STERNE. 23 ance with literary folly, dwelt with en- thusiasm on the grotesque pictures of manners and opinions, displayed in his favourite authors. It may even be sus- pected, that by this influence he was drawn aside from his natural bias to the pathetic ; for in the serious parts of his works, he seems to have depended on his own force, and to have found in his own mind whatever he wished to pro- duce ; but in the ludicrous, he is gene- y rally a copyist, and sometimes follows \\ his original so closely, that he forgets the \i changes of manners, which give an ap- Jl pearance of extravagance to what was once correct ridicule. It is more necessary to preserve a strict attention to manners, in works of this sort, because the ludicrous, by its nature, tends to exaggeration^ The passion of laughter, the strongest effect of ludicrous impressions, seems to be produced by the intensity, or more properly, the excess of pleasurable ideas : circum pnecordia B 4 2t . ILLUSTRATIONS ludere, is the proper character of this class of emotions. Thus, a certain degree of fulness improves the figure, but it' it be encreased to excessive fatness, it becomes risible. So in the qualities of the mind, modesty is agreeable extreme bashful- ness is ridiculous : we are amused with vivacity, we laugh at levity. If we ob- serve the conversation of a professed jester, it will appear that his great secret consists in exaggeration. This is also the art of caricaturists : add but a trifling degree of length or breadth to the features of an agreeable face, and they become ludi- crous. In like manner, unbolster Fal- slaffy and his wit will affect us less, the nearer he approaches to the size of a reasonable man. I may add, that in idiots, and persons of weak understanding, laughter is a common expression of surprise or plea- eurc ; and Young has observed. That fools are ever on the laughing aide. OF STERNE. 25 All these remarks prove, that we do not reason with the accuracy which some au- thors suppose, concerning the turpitude, or incongruity of the ideas presented to us, before we give way to mirth. If their theory were just, a malicious critic might prove from their effects, the incongruity of their own discussions. There is little difficulty in accounting for the number and excellence of the ludicrous writers, who appeared during the sixteenth century, and who not only resemble each other in their manner, but employ similar turns of thought, and by often relating the same anecdotes, shew that they drew their materials from a common store. The Amadis, and other similar ro- mances, had amused the short intervals of repose, which the pursuits of love and arms afforded, previous to the reign of Francis I. That prince, equally the pa- tron of letters and of dissoluteness, formed 20 ILLUSTRATIONS a court, which required works more cal- culated to inflame the imagination : a libertine scholarship became the tone of polite conversation, wliich was too faith- fully copied by the fashionable wits. Even Brantome thinks it necessary to treat his readers with quotations, though mangled so barbarously, that he seems to have caught them by his ear alone. Neither the offensive details of this author, nor the satirical touches of D'Aubign6, could persuade us of the extreme cor- ruption of manners in those times, if a witness, whose veracity cannot be ques- tioned, had not left his testimony of its enormity, in a work dedicated to Cardinal Mazarine, and destined to the instruction of Louis XIV. " There never was (says Perefixe, in speaking of the court of Henry III) a court more vicious, or more corrupted. Impiety, atheism, magic, the most horrible impurities, the blackest Ucjichery and perfidy, poisoning and OF STERNE. 27 assassination prevailed in it to the highest degree." * Rabelais, who shewed the way to the rest, may be considered as forming the link between the writers of romance and those of simple merriment. Great part of his book is thrown into the form of a burlesque romance ; but, from the want of models, or of taste, he found no other method of softenjog his narrative, than ^e intrfiducdon of buffoonery. Some of his successors preferred the form of con- versations, characteristically supported ; a fashion introduced under the counte- pance of Henry III. who, in the midst of his vices and his dangers, still felc the attractions of literature. He instituted a meeting, which was held twice a-week in his closet, where a question was de- bated by the most learned men whom he could attach to the courts, and by some ladies, who had cultivated letters. This was called the King's Academy, and ad- * See jiQte \, '.'8 ILLUSTRATIONS mission to it was reckoned a particular mark of favour.* It is remarkable that this institution took place at the very time when, according to Perefixe, the morals of the court were most depraved, and it may be suspected that the discus- sions were not always strictly philoso- phical. From this Royal Academy, Bouchet seems to have taken the plan of his Serecs, and it is not improbable that the fashion extended itself among the courtiers. In the succeeding century, it seemed to be revived in the celebrated conversations at the Hotel de Rambouillet, in recording which, Scuderi has so completely suc- ceeded in preserving the verbose polite- ness of the time, and in tiring the reader * I.e Roi I'aiant fait de son Academic (1575) c'etoit une assemblee qu'il faisoit deux fois la Semaine en son cabinet, pour ouir les plus doctes hommes qu'il pouvoit, et mcsnies quelques dames qui avoient estudie sur un probleiiie toujeurs propose par celui qui avoit Ic mieux fait a la derniere dispute. D' Aubignif Histoire UniverseUe. OF STERNE. 29 to death. Beroalde and D'Aubigne pub- lished then- most distuiguished satirical pieces, in the colloquial form : they cannot be termed dialogues, when we think of Lucian, and when we consider, that the diffidence of Erasmus prevented him from assummg that title for his charming Conversations. The minds of men, just bursting from the severe oppression of theological and philosophical abuses, were peculiarly im- pressed with the ludicrous aspect which the objects of their former terror then presented. They had seen absurdity in its full vigour, and even in its tyranny ; and they enjoyed the opportunities of derision, which the violence of parties afforded them. Above all, the personal character of some of their princes, especially some females of the race of Valois, cherished this species of writing. Margaret Queen of Navarre, the accomplished sister oi Francis I. was not ojily the patroness of 30 ILLUSTRATIONS literary men, but a writer of great merit. The original edition of her novels is be- come extremely scarce, and was ren- dered into " beau langage," by some meddler, whose attempt proves his want of taste and feeling. But even through this kind of translation, we discern a mind of exquisite sensibility, highly ornamented both by reading and con- versation. Her poetical correspondence with Ma- rot does great honour to her wit and ele- gance, while it shews her sincere respect for genius, unalloyed by the jealousy too common among authors of her preten- sions. Marot had concluded some verses, which he sent to a lady, as the forfeit of a wager, with a wish, that his creditors would accept the same kind of payment. Margaret replied in the following lines : Si ceux d qoi dcvez, comme vous elites, Vous cognc-yssoicnt comme je vous cognois, Quitte seriez des debtes que vous fites, Ia: temps pafisr, tant gran(Jt'S que petites. 6V STERNE. 31 En leur payant un dizain, toutefois Tel que le votre, qui vaut niieux mille fois. Que K argent deu par vous, en conscience ; Car estimer ou peut 1' argent au poids, Mais on ne peut (et j' en donne ma voix) Assez priser vostre belle science. If those, Marot, by whom you're held in thraHj Esteem'd, like me, your rich, excelling vein, Full soon their harsh demands they would reear. And quit you of your debts, both great and smal^, One polish'd stanza thankful to obtain ; For verse like your's I hold more precious giin Than commerce knows, or avarice can device : Gold may be rated to its utmost grain. But well I deem (nor think my judgment vkm% That none your noble art can over-prize. If Marot is to be believed, iti his answer, he made good use of this ele- gant compliment : Mes creanciers, qui de dizains n' ont cure, Ont leu le vostre : et sur ce leur ay dit. Sire Michel, Sire Bonaventure, La soeur du roi a pour moi fait ce dit : Lors eux cuidans que fusse en grand credit, M' ont apelle Monsieur a cry et cor, Et m' a valu vostre escrit autant qu' or : Car promis ont, non seulement d' attendre, Mais d' en prester, foi de marchand, encore : Et j' ay promis, foi de Clfement, d* en prendre. 32 ILLUSTRATIONS My cits, who nor for ode nor stanza care. Have read your lines, and op'd their rugged hearts ; I said. Sir Balaam, and Sir Plum, look there. Thus our king's sister values my good parts : They, deeming me advanc'd by courtly^grts, Honour'd and worshipp'd me, with bows profound. And by your golden verses I abound ; Like ready coin, my credit they restore ; To lend again my worthy friends are bound, I pledg'd my honest word to borrow more. A collection of the poems of this cele- brated lady was published, under the title of Les Marguerites de la Marguerite des Princesses; the Pearls of the Pearl of Princesses ; a conceit worthy of the com- piler, who was her valet de chambre. Margaret was suspected of an attach- ment to the reformed religion, in com- mon with several of the wits whom she patronized, but her brother's aifection sheltered her from persecution. Francis condemned the opinions of the reformed, as tending more to the destruction of monarcliic!?, than to tliG edification of souls. Brantome adds, in his manner. OF STERNE. S3 that the great Sultan Soliman was of the same opinion.* An excellent authority for the papal religion ! Even the death of this princess was conni ::ted with her love of knowledge ; she contmcted c^ mortal disease, by ex- posing herself to the night-air, in observ- ing a comet.'l' Her virtues were not inherited by the first wife of Henry IV. who bore the same name and title ; but the second Margaret * The whole passage is curious. " Le grand Sultan Soliman en disoit de mesme : laquelle (la reformee) combien qu 'elle renversa plusieurs points de la religion Chrestienne et du Pape, il ne la pouvoit aymer; d* autant, disoit-il, que les religieux d' icelle n' estoient que brouillons et seditieux, et ne se pouvoient tenir en repos, qu' ils ne remuassent tousjoursu. Voila pourquoi le roi Fran9ois, sage prince s' il en fust oncques, en prevoyant les miseres qui en sont venues en plusieurs parts de la Chrestiente, les ha'issoit, et fut un peu rigou- reux a faire brusler .vifs les heretiques de son temps. i>i ne laissa-t-il pourtant a favoriser les princes pro- testants d' Allemagne centre V Erapereur. Ainsi ces grands rois se gouvernent comme il leur plaist. Brantome, torn, ii, p, 281, 2. t lb. torn. ii. p. 289, Vor.. I. S+ ILLUSTRATIONS seems to have possessed, with the spuit of gallantry, some degree of the love of letters, which distinguished her grand- father Francis I. It is sufficiently clear, from many scattered anecdotes in Bran- tome, and other writers of that time, that during the brilliant period of her youth, her manners were calculated to encourage the class of authors which I have been describing ; but it must be owned, that she concluded like many other lively characters, by shewing as much fervour in devotion, as she had formerly dis- played in libertinism. Among those fascinating women, who united the attractions of taate and know- ledge to those of elegance and beauty, it would be unjust to forget the unfortunate Mary Stuart. Brantome, an eye-wit- ness of the early part of her life, informs us that she was much attached to litera- ture, anci that she patronized Ronsard and Du Bellay. Her dirge on the death of Francis II. which Brantome has pre- OF STERNE. $5 served, contains some touches of tru feeling amidst its conceits. The affair of Chastelard, of which the same writer gives us an account, shews her affabihty to men of genius; though it must be confessed^ that she exhibited at last, a degree of prudery, perhaps too austere. Chastelard was a young man of family and talents, who had embarked in the suite of Mary, when she returned from France, to take possession of a disgusting sovereignty. He paid his court to the queen by composing several pieces of poetry, during the voyage, and one among the rest, which I have been tempted to imitate from Brantome's Sketch of it. " Et entre autres il en fit une d* elle sur un traduction en Italien ; car il le parloit et 1' entendoit bien, qui com- mence : Che gwva posseder citta e regni, ^c. Qui est un sonnet tr^s-bien fait, dont la substance est telle : De quoi serf posseder tant de roymones, citez, villeSf C 2 30 ILLUSTRATIONS provinces ; commander a tant de peuples ; se /aire respecter, craindre et admirer, et voir d' un chacun ; et dormir vejve, seulc, et froide comine .glace .^ " .' i '- ' . . .' ' What boots it to possess a royal state. To view fair sabject-towns from princely tow'rs. With mask and song to sport in frolic bow'rs. Or watch with prudence o'er a nation's fate> If the heart throb not to a tender mate ; If doomM, when feasts are o'er, and midnight lours. Still to lie lonely in a widow'd bed. And waste in chill regret the secret hours ? Happier the lowly maid, by fondness led To meet the transports of some humble swain, Than she, the object of her people's care, Ecver'd by all, who finds no heart to share. Ami pines, too great for love, in splendid pain; Mary sought relief from tlic tiresome uniformity of the voyage, in attending to the productions of the young French- man; she even deigned to reply to them, and amused Iierself frequently with his conversation. This dangerous familiarity Qveriiowercd the heart of poor Ciiastelard. He conceived a hopeless and unconquer- able passion, and found himself, almost OF STERNE. 37 at the same moment, obliged to quit the, presence of its object, and to return ta his native country. .l ; .'' Soon afterwards, the civil wars began in France; and Chasteiard, who Was a protectant, eagerly sought a pretence for re-visiting Scotland, in his aversion to take arms against the royal party. Mary received him with goodness, but she soon repented her condescension. His passion no longer knew any bounds, and he was found one evening, by her women, con- cealed under her bed, just before she retired to rest. She consulted equally her dignity and her natural mildness, by pardoning this sally of youthful frenzy, and commanding the affair to be sup- pressed. But Chasteiard was incorrigible : he repeated his offence, and the queen delivered him up to her courts of justice, by which he was sentenced to be be- headed. His conduct, at the time of his death, was romantic in the extreme. He would C 3 *>.-; jg ILLUSTRATIONS accept no spiritual assistance, but read, with great devotion, Ronsard's Hymn on Death. He then turned towards the Queen's apartments, and exclaimed. Fare- well die fahesty a?id most cruel princess in the world; after which he submitted to the stroke of justice, with the courage of a Rinaldo or an Olindo. The ancient heroines of romance were content with banishing a presumptuous lover from their presence. Perhaps the extravagance of Chastelard's feeling was such, that he might have considered exile from Scotland as the severest of punish- ments. Mary certainly exercised her dispensing power with more lenity, on some other occasions. The establishment of a buffoon, or king's jester, which oj^erated so forcibly on Sterne's imagination, as to make him ^^ adopt the name of Ym'kky furnished an additional motive for the exertions of ludicrous writei-s, in that age. To jest was the ambition of tiie best company; OF STERNE. ^0 and when the progress of civilization is duly weighed, between the period to which I have confined my observations, and the time of Charles II. of this country, it will appear that the value set upon sheer wit, as it was then called, was hardly less inconsistent with strict judg- ment, than was the merriment of the cap and bells with the grave discussions of the furred doctors, or learned ladies of the old French court. C 4 40 ILLUSTRATIONS CHAPTER II. Ludicrous tenters, from lohom Sterne probably took general ideas, or particular passages. Rabelais Beroalde D'Aubigne Bouchet Bruscambille Scarron Swift Gabriel John. OOME of my readers may probably find themselves introduced, in this chap- ter, to some very strange acquaintances, and may experience a sensation Uke that which accompanies the first entrance into a gallery of ancient portraits ; where the bulf and old iron, the black scull-caps, wide ruffs and farthingales, however richly bedecked, conceal, for a while, the expression and the charms of the best features. With a little patience, it will OF STERNE. 41 appear that wit, like beauty, can break through the most unpromising disguise. From Rabelais, Sterne' seems to have caught the design of writing a general satire on the abuse of speculative opinions. The dreams of Rabelais's commentators have indeed discovered a very different intention in his book, but we have his own authority for rejecting their surmises as groundless. In the dedication of part of his work to Cardinal Chastillon, he mentions the political^Husions imputed to him, and disclaims them exp ressly. He declares, that he wrote for the recre-/)k ation of persons languishing in sickness, or under the pressure of grief and anxiety, and that his joyous prescription had suc- ceeded with many patients. Que pliisieurs gens, langoureuxt malades, ou autrement fachez et desolez, avoient a la lecture d! icelles trompe lew ennuiy temps joy eusement passe, et rcgue allegresse et consolation nou- velle. And he adds, seulement avois egard et intention par escrit dormer ce peu de soul- 42 ILLUSTRATIONS agement que pouvois cs qffligcz et ?nalades absais. The religious disputes, which then agitated Europe, were subjects of ridicule too tempting to be withstood, especially as Rabelais was protected by the Chastillon family ; this, with his abuse of the monks, excited such a cla- mour against him, that Francis I. felt a curiosity to hear his book read, and as our author informs us, found nothing improper in it.* ^ The birth and education of Pantagruel evidently gave rise to those of Mardnus Scriblerus, and both were fresh in Sterne's memory, when he composed tlie first chapters of Tristram Shandy. It must be acknowledged, that the application of the satire is more clear in Rabelais, than in his imitators. Rabelais 4 I attacked boldly the scholastic mode of educauon, in tiiat part of his work ; and shewed tlie superiority of a natural rae- EiM* avoit trorae postage uulcun suspect. OF STERNE. 49 thod of in struction, more accommodated to the feelings and capacities of the young. But Sterne, and the authors of Scriblerus, appear to ridicule the folly of son ie indivi^M^^ * ^^^' no public course of education has ever been j)roposedj^s toTFat which they exhibit. Perhaps it was Sterne's purpose, to deride the methods of shortening the business of education, which several in^ genious men have amused themselves by contriving. The Lullian art^ which was once much celebrated, was burlesqued by Swift, in his Project of a Literary Turmng Machine, in the Voyage to Laputa. Des Cartes has defined Lully's plan to be, the art of prating copiously, and without judgment, concerning things of which we are ignorant:* an art so generally practised in our times, that its author is no more thought of than the * Ars Lullii, ad copios^, et sine judicio de iis quae nescimus garriendum. Brucker. Histor. Critic. Philot. t. ii. p. 205. <". 44 ILLUSTRATIONS inventor of the compass. Liilly's scem^ to have been similar to the fortune-telling schemes which we see on the ladies' fans, that enable any person to give ati ariswe^ io aiiy question, without understanding ifeither one or the other. Erasmus touched briefly on this subject, in his Ars Notoria, where he has exposed, in a few words, the folly of desiring to gain knowledge, without an adequate exertion of tiie fa- culties. Providence, as be says finely, has decreed, that those common acquisitions, money, gems, plate, nohle mansions, and dominion, should be sometimes bestowed on the indolent and unworthy; but those things which constitute our true riches, and which are property our own, inust be procured by our own labour.* Those who seldom knew the want of power on other occa- * Atqui sic visum est soperis. Opes istas vulgares, auruni, gemmas, argeiitum, palatla, regnurn, nonnun- quain largiuntur ignavis et immerentibus ; sed qufe Terae sunt opes, ac propria nostrae sunt, voluerunt parari laboribu!^. OF STERNE. i^. sioiiSj have felt it on this: DlONYSlUS and Frederick both experienced, that there is no royal road to the genuine honours of literature. If Sterne had been sufficiently ac- quainted with the philosophical systemSj of his time, he might have converted 4he Lullian art, into an excellent burlesque of the Leibnitzian doctrine of pre-esta- blished harmony, then warmly discussed, and now com pletely forgotten . He seerns to have avoided with care every con trpr; v ersial sub ject, which could involve him m difficulties. I observe in the sneer at J Water-landish knowledge, aniong the criti-. cisms of Yorick's sermons, a slight glance at a celebrated theological dispute : but, like his own monk, he had looked down at the prebendary's vest, and the hectic passed away in a moment.* h^d^^f- * Dr. Brown's Estimate is referred to in another passage, s,o oscurely, that.aaodern readeri can hardly recognize it. '- . 49 ILLUSTRATIONS It would be tedious to point out every parallel passage, between Sterne, and an author whose book is in every one's hands. One of the conversations in Tristram Shandy, is borrowed completely from the Frenchman. " Now Ambrose Paraeus convinced my father, that the true and efficient cause of what had engaged so much the atten- tion of the world, and upon which Wgnitz and Scroderus had wasted so much learning and fine parts was nei- ther this nor that but that the length and goodness of the nose, was owing simply to the softness and flaccid ity of the nurse's breast as the flatness and shortness of puisne noses was, to the firmnes-s and elastic repulsion of tlye same organ of nutrition in the heal and lively which, though happy for the woman, was the undoing of the child, inasmuch as his nose was so snubbed, so rubbed, so rebated, and so refrigerated thereby, a> never to arrive ad mensuram suam W-: OP STERNE. 47 legitimam; but that in case of the flaccidity and softness of the nurse or mother's breast by sinking into it, quoth Paraeus, as into so much butter, the nose was comforted, nourished, &c."* '* the causes of short and long noses. There is no cause but one, rephed my uncle Toby, why one man's nose is longer than another's, but because that God pleases to have it so. That isJS^aiir ^gi^^r's solution, said my Father. 'Tis he, continued my uncle Toby, looking up, and not regarding my Father's inter- ruption, who makes us all, and fram^ and puts us together, in such forms and proportions, and for such ends, as is agreeable to his infinite wisdom"-f- " Pourquoy, dit Gargantua, est ce que frere Jean a si beau nez I Par ce (repon- dit Grangousier) qu' ainsi Dieu 1' a vouiu, lequel nous fait en telle forme, & telle fin, * Tristram Shandy, vol, iii. chap, xxxviii. t Tristram Sbandy, vol, iii. chap. xli. # 4S ILLUSTRATIONS selon son divln arbitre, que fait un potier ses vaisseaux. Par ce (dit Ponocrates) qu* il fut dcs premiers {i la foire des nez. II print de plus beaux & des plus grands. Trut avant (dit le moine) selon la vraye Philosophic Monastique, c' est, par ce que ma Nourrice avoit les tetins molets, en r allaictant, mon nez y en frond roit comme en beurre, et la s' eslevoit et croissoit comme la paste dedans la mets. Les durs tetins des Nourrices font les en fans camus. Mais gay, gay, ad for- mam nasi cognoscitur ad te levavi."* Sterne even condescended to adopt some of those lively extravagancies, which (as Rabelais declares that he wrote " en mangeant be buvant") would tempt us to believe that the Gallic wit, like Dr. King, sometimes " Drank till he could not speak, and then he writ." " Bon jour ! good morrow ! so you have got your cloak on betimes ! but * Liv. 1. chap. xli. OF STERNE. 49 't is a cold morning, and you judge the matter rightly 't is better to be well mounted than go o* foot and obstruc- tions in the glands are dangerous And how goes it with thy concubine thy wife and thy litde ones o' both sides ? and when did you hear from the old gentleman and lady, &c.* " Gens de bien," says Rabelais, " Dieu vous sauve et gard. Ou estes vous ? je ne peux vous voir. Attendez que je chausse mcs lunettes. Ha, ha, bien & beau s'en va Quaresme, je vous voy. Et doncques ? Vous avez eu bonne vinee, d ce que 1' on m' ii dit. Vous, vos femmes, einfans, parens ct families estes en sant^ desirec. Cela va bien, cela est bon, cela me plaist " &c. Beroalde, Sieur de Verville, a canon of the cathedral of Tours, con- sidered his reputation as a wit, more than as a clergyman, in his Moyen de Parvcnir, * Tristram Shandy, vol. viii. chap, iii. Vol. r. D 50 ILLUSTRATIONS published in 1599; a book disgusting by its grossness, but extremely curious, from the striking pictures which it offers, 6t' the manners and knowledge of the age. From him, I suspect, Sterne took Mr. Shandy's repartee to Obadiah. "My father had a little favourite mare, which he had consigned over to a most beautiful Arabian horse, in order to have a p^d out of her for his own riding : he was sanguine in all his projects ; so talked about his pr.d every day with as absolute a security, as if it had been reared, broke, bridled and saddled at his door ready for mounting. By some neglect or other in Obadiah, it so fell out, that my father's expectations were answered with nothing better than a mule, and as ugly a beast of the kind as ever was produced. " My mother and my uncle Toby expected my fiuher would be the death of Obadiah, and that there never would be an end of the disaster. See here ! you rascal, cried my father, pointing to OF STERNE. 51 the mule, what you have done. It was not I, said Obadiah How 4o I knovy that ? replied my father." * . Un petit gar9on de Paris apella un autre. Ills de putain, qui s' en prit k pleurer, et le vint dire a sa mere, qui lui dit: que ne lui as-tu dit qu' il avoit menti ? Et que savois-je, dit il.-f- The MoT/en de Parvenir has all the abruptness, and quickness of transition, which Sterne was so fond of assuming. There is also some galimatias, though not so much as in Rabelais. I own it is possible, that Sterne may have found this turn in some other book, for Beroalde has furnished subjects of pillage to a great number of authors. He mentions a cu- rious badge of party, which I think Sterne would have noticed, if he had been acquainted with the book. " Je me souviens qu' aux seconds troubles * Tristram Shandy, vol. v. chap. iii. t Moyen de Parvenir, torn- i- p. 69. D 2 52 ILLUSTRATIONS nous etions en ganiison h la ChaiiiL Etant en garde s'il passoit un bomme avec line braguette, nous 1' apelUons Papiste, et la lui coupions; c' etoit mal fait, d' autant que sous tel signe y ^ de grandcs mysteres quelquefois cacb^'s. ^Je m' en repentis, et m' en allai ^ Cosne, ou nous nous finies sol- dats derecbef, et nous mismes es bandes catbobques. II nous avuit une autre cause de remords de conscience ; c* est que voyant ces tibraguet<^s, les disions Huguenots."* Tbe detection of imitations is certainly, in many cases, decided by taste, more tban by reasoning; tbe investigation is slow, but tbe conviction is rapid. The skilful miner thus each cranny tries. Where wrapt in dusky rocks the crystal lies. Slow on the varying surface tracks his spoil. Oft' leaves, and oft renews his patient toil ; Till to his watchful eye the secret line Betrays the rich recesses of the mine ; Then the rude portals to his stroke give way ; Th* imprison'd glories glitter on the day. * Moyen de Parvenir, torn, i. p. 59. OF STERNE. 53 It is sufficiently evident, from the works of Sterne's Eugenius,* that he, at least, was deeply read in Beroalde, who wanted nothing but decency to render him an universal favourite. -f- Theodore Agrippa D'Aubigne is well known by his historical works, in which, valuable and interesting as they are, he has not always been able to conceal his satirical disposition. In his Baron de Fosneste, with all the extravagance of the Gascon, we are so constantly recalled to right and severe reason by the other characters, that it almost produces the full effect of genuine history on our minds. We discover, in every page, the caustic moralist, the uncorrupted and in- dignant courtier, unable to congeal the * John Hall Stevenson, Esq. of Skelt<4n Castle. f This doubt is now completely removed, by a copy of the Moyeii de Parvenir, which I received from Mr. Heber. The blank leaf contains Sterne's Auto- graph, L. Sterne, a Paris, 8 livres ; and the book, as Mr. Heber observed, bears evident marks of its having been frequently turned over. D 3 54 ILLUSTRATIONS foibles of a monarch, whom he loved and served but too faithfully, and im- patient of those v^ho acquired the favour of Henry, by shewing more indulgence to his weaknesses. This book may he considered, in some Pleasure, as a sup- plement to his general history, for it contains much secret anecdote, as well as the most curious particulars respecting manners. Perhaps the story of Paufrot, and the lady de NoaillS, in this book, suggested to Sterne the scene with the Piedmontese lady, in his Sentimental Journey. There is stronger reason to believe that Sterne took the hint of beginning somfe of his sermons, in a startling and unusual mannei*, from this source. D'Aubigne, who seems to have been a man of deep religious impressions, has exposed, with equal keenness, the extravagancies of the monks, and of the ministers. He men- tions one of the latter, who began a ser- mon thus : Par la vertu de Dieu, par la OF STERNE. .55 mort de Dieii, par la chair de Dieu, par le sang de Dieu ; and added after a long pause, nous sommes saiwez et deiivrez de r mfer. Several instances in the same taste, but not so well authenticated, may be found in ths Passe Temps agreable. I must here vindicate Sterne from a charge of plagiarism, which has been made from inattention to dates. It has been said, that he borrowed much from the history of Friar Gerund ; and many parallel passages have been cited (as they well might) to prave the assertion. The truth is, tliat the history of Friar Gerund, composed by Father Isla, to ridicule the absurdities of the itinerant Spanish preaclicrs, was pubUshed in Spain, the very same year in which the two first volumes of Tristram Shandy appeared. It was translated into English, several years afterwards, by a clergyman, who thought proper to imitate, in his translation, the style of Tristram Shandy, then extremely popular. If any plagiarisms exist, therc- D 4 5(i ILLUSTRATIONS fore, they are chargeable on the translator. The original of Friar Gerund appeared in 1758; the translation in 1772. As a specimen of D'Aubigne's style, which unites the severe and the ludicrous, I shall quote the following strokes on a controversial point. " Your devotions,*' says the Baron, speaking of the reformed, " are invisible, and your church is invisible." " Why do you not finish," retorts his opponent, " by reproaching us, like savages, that our God is invisible?" " But we would have every thing visible," cries the Baron. C est pounjuoi, replies the other, entre les reliqucs de S. Front on troiwa dans une petite phiole un estemiiment du S. Esprit. D*Aubign<^ was so fond of writing epi- grams, that he could not abstain from them, even in his history. He had no great genious for poetry, but his epigrams are generally acute, though better turned in the thought than the expression. One of them, which is introduced in OF STERNE. 57 the Baron dc Fcenest6, is written for a man of distinction,* whose wife, finding his mistress very ill drest, thought fit to clothe her anew. Lors, says the Baron in his jargon, lou monsur boiant cette vra-' berie, en dit ce petit mout, < Oui, ma femme, il est tout certain Que c' est vain9re la jalousie, Et uu trait de grand courloisie D' avoir revestu ma putin. Si je veux, comme la merveille Et 1' excellence des maris, Rendre a vos ribaux la pareille, Cela ne se peut qu' a Paris. I own, my life, beyond all doubt. Your merit great, your conduct sage. Since spurning jealous qualms and rage. You 've deck'd my girl so smartly out. If I, attentive to your Wants, Our mutual confidence to crown. Should do as much for your gallants, 'T virould empty half the shops in town. This, and many other passages in the writers of" those times, shew that the dis- * Mr. de Sourdis. 58 ILLUSTRATIONS solute conduct of thegay circles in France is not of modern date. The turn of the lines I have just quoted, is in the taste of Voltaire or Bernis. In fact, the great corruption of manners took place in the time of Francis I. who sacrificed to the ostentation, and the future elegance of the court, every principle leading to true happiness. Another epigram of D'Aubign6*s was founded on a repartee of Henry IV, in his youth. Sylvia her gambling nephew chides. With many a sharp and pithy sentence ; The graceless youth her care derides. Yet seems to promise her repentance : ** When you, dear aunt, relinquish man. Expect me to abandon gaming." The prudent matron* shakes her fan ; ' Go, rogue, I find you 're past reclaiming. The same thought has been turned by some of the modern French epigram- matists. The question respecting the sincerity of Henry's conversion seems pretty clearly OF STERNE. 9 decided in the Baron de Foenest6, in the chapter on Nuns, book iv. chapter xii. Sterne has generally concealed the sources of his curious trains of investiga- tion, and uncommon opinions, but in one instance he ventured to break through his restraint, by mentioning Bouchefs Evenmg Conferences, among the treasures of Mr. Shandy's library. This book is now become so extremely scarce, that for a long period, it had escaped all my enquiries, and the most persevering exer- tions of my friends. Some of the most curious collectors of books, among whom I need only mention the late excellent -Dr. Farmer, informed me that they had never seen it. I owed to the indefatigable kindness of Thomas Thompson, Esq. -M. P. the satisfaction of perusing an odd volume of this work. I have great reason to believe that it was in the Skelton library some years ago, where I suspect Sterne found most of the authors of this e Sentimental Journey, in taking up the Roman Comique. It is the chapter of the Dwarf, which every reader of Sterne must immediately recollect, but I shall transcribe that part which is di- rectly taken from Scarf on. * See note V. ; *' A ' poor defenceless being of this order [a dwarf], had got thrust somehow or other into this luckless place [the par- t(rre]-^fch? night was hot, and he was surrounded by beings two feet and a balf higher than himself. The dwarf suffered inexpressibly on ^U sides ; but the thing which incommoded him most, was a tall CorpMlent German, near seven feet high^ who stood between him and all possibility of bis seeing either the stage or the actors. The poor dwarf did all he could to get a peep at what was going forwards, by peeking for some little opening betwixt the;Geffl?an's ^W^ m^^ his body, trying first one si^le and then the other ; but the German stood square in thq most unac- Gommpdating posture that can be ima- gined the dwarf might as well have been placed at the bottom of the deepest draw-well in Paris ; so he civilly reached up Jiis hand to the German's sleeve, aind told him bis distress, The German t'lupaed his liead back, looked down upon E 2 OS ILLUSTRATIONS him, as Goliah did upon David aftd unfeelingly resumed his posture." ' ' Such was the distress of Scarron*s disM astrous hero, Ragotin. *' II vint tard a la corned ie, & pour la punition de ses pechez, il se pla9a derriere un gentil- homme -'*i^ .'<- ;;,(.'. ;;i " The Life^ of a Satyrical Pup^y, called Nim," is a small octavo volume, of 1 1 8 pages, " by T. M. printed by and for Humphrey Mosley, at the Prince's Arms, in St. Paul's Church-Yard, 1657.*' It is dedicated to George Duke of Buck- ingham, and presents to him Nim, and Bung his man, " both born to attend his lordship's mirth." It appears to me a very lame attempt at personal satire, the object of which cannot now be dis-^ covered. The book is extremely rare. Nothing can be more unlike the style of Tristram Shandy, than the contents of this work, and I acquit Sterne com- pletely from the charge of having copied it. The frontispiece represents Nim and his man, in the dress of the times. The figure of Bu7ig serves to explain a phrase T4 ILLUSTRATIONS in Shakespeare's Twelfth Night; he is cross'gartered. The trunk-breeches do Hot reach quite to the knee, above and below which, the garter is applied spi- rally, till it disappears in the boot. " Why," says our poet, " may not imagination trace the noble dust of Alex- ander, till he find it stopping a bung- hole \ " These masters of tidicule may be tracked to a state of similar degrada- tion, through the works of estimable writers, to miserable farcesj and at length to the jest-books, where the dregs of different authors are so effectually inter- mingled, that the brightest wit is con- founded with the vilest absurdity. T ..:':ar: OF STERNH.ii f iborib ^^mwlav 'Mi; \i'^-U> r , Sketches qf ludicrous writers, of the six- AjunM^^^ flW(/ seventeenth centuries, v'i T i./i^ ^..u. uu.;/ ^ The spring ha* tibt beett more cele^- brated by poets, than the evening by the authors of facetious books. Pefrhaps the jovial Deipnosophists of AthenaeUs infltf- fenced Bouchet, and some of the morfe learned Writers of this kind, who repr^ sent their discussions as taking place after supper. In the Moyen de Parvenir, the company are supposed to be constantlj^ at table, and to form a sort of Everlasting club. f'*^ I. The Serees, or Evenings, of dxUL- i;aume Bouchet, have gone through three editions; the first at Paris, in three U ILIiUSTR^TIONS volumes, duodecimo, 1608 ; the other of Rouen, in the same form ; the date, 1615 ; the third, which is inferior to these, at Lyons, in 1614, in three volumes, octavo, bound together. They are all extremely rare, in this country. That Sterne had seen this book in the SkeltoN Libmry, I have strong reason to believe ; he must have been much gratified with its grotesque wit, and its laboured discussions of trifles ; but I can- not perceive that he has made much use of it. The art of transplanting teeth, which has been considered as a recent invention, is mentioned by Bouchet, in his twenty-seventh Seree. " J'ai vu aussi une jeune Dame, qui se fit arracher une dent, ou parce qu'elle estoit gate6, ou mal situe^, puis s*en fit remettre une autre, quelle fit arracher a une sienne Damoiselle, laquelle reprit, et servit com- .^e les autres." II. The Apres-Diners, or Afternoonsy pf the Count D* Arete, ought perhaps to have preceded Boutih^fi'^ Thjj? was one of the league-ltbds against Henry "IV, and contains, like hiiny other political satires, more venom than wit. My copy of it was published in 1614, at Paris. >> III. The Epidorjpides, or After Sup- per-times, of CasjJar Ens, is a collection of apophthegms, arid serious stories^ in- termixed with sbme^ ludicrous matter. The copy in my possession was published at Cologne, 16^4, in duodecimo. The introduction contains an uncommon dis- play of learning, respecting the suppers of the Romans : their furnittfre, their dishes, their mode of decubitus at table, and particularly their diffei^nt kinds of bread, are discussed with the diligence of an Apicius : the author must certainly hare 'talked with some old Romati- ghost/ vm^^0t^h^mi^^^t^t 4341^1 'IVil The. Escraignes Dijbnnoises, or Booths of Dijon, by Tabourot, were pub- lished at Paris, in>45^5v -They contain ' .> at : j'ff.''fi'>tiOn ;. TT ILLUSTRATIONS night-4ialc^i|QS, anpiong the ycaing people Qf tlie lower cUfi^, in Dijon, who were i^customefl to, er^pt booths, indifferent quartern of tjiat city, during the severity of vvinte^, in wiiich; the,, women assem- bled to knit or spiji;:^fj4 where they were attended by the. young men, who vied with theflpb i^ telHi)g stories. It does uot appear thst. interne was acquainted with thi^ authoi*, but I find that Switif has poached deeply in his BiGARRURES. The Art of Punning was in great part extracted from this whimsical production of Tabourot, which con^aii^s an extr^-, ordinary number of puns and clenches,; The Rcbits 4e Picardk seem to have chiefly attracted Swift's attention: they combine both thfi powere of engraving and descriptiost, ; tp produce 9, conceit. Such is the instance referred to by Swiftr An abbQjiriif; (represented lying prppe,' with a Jilly growing out of his body^^ itt.FjeiK'U, this nivist b^ read ; ,\^ Abbe mort en pre ; au cul lis : ' OP STERNB. ' W in 1-atin ; V- ^ ,^im'n^ tM no h ii/jup Habe mortem prae oculis. ^ llOd Taboiirot asserts, that he copied this rebus from the gate of a monastery. Such was the wit of the sixteenth cen- tury. I have a beautiful edition of the Bi- garrures, in two volumes, duodecimo, printed at Paris, in 158^,. The Apoph- thegmes du Sieur Gaulard, contained in this book, have laid the foundation of some of our jest-books. It seems to have escaped the notice of the ingenious author of an Essay on Irish Bulls, that most of the stories, commonly quoted as such, are either of Greek, or French origin. The Aje/a of Hierocles contain many of those blunders, which are reck- oned standard Irish jokes; and in the ridiculous mistakes of the Sieur Gaulard, as recorded by Tabourot, many others may be found* The defender of Ireland may therefore triumphantly send back these aliens, which have been so unjustly 80. ILI^ySTRATIONS quartered on her country, to their native soil of Athens, Paius, and Dijon.* '^^ffy.j' ,;A>,>mQre )spber compilation ap- peared in 1585, under the title of Les Neuf Matine<^s dtl Seigneur de Cholieres. It consists of conversations between a 4qnv^Jpsc:ei?.t^l)d.lu,.fieads, on various ^(Kt'.'y^'r.otjh ,^o^(tul 07 owl 'Z: * It is remarkable, that Swift, who piqued himself 0^ his accuracy, and who could not bear to be thought an Irishman, has published a bull, in his first Drapier's Letter. *' Therefore I do most earnestly exhort you, as men, as christians, as parents, and as lovers of your country, to read this paper with the utmost attention, or get it read to you by others :" this is an exemplifica- tion of the old story in the jest books, where a templar leaves a note in the key-hole, directing the findet^,' if he cannot read itj to carry it to the stationer at the gate, who will read it for him. But the most extraordinary of all blunders, and one undoubtedly of Irish iprbduction, is a fact mentioned i>y Railph, in hi* Wstory of England. During King William's campaigns in Ireland, a party of the natives, m King James's interest, undertook to fortify a pass against the English army. They were, of course, employed for some time on this design ; but when the ^ork was completed, it was found, says Ralph, that ' they had turned the palisades the wrong way," so that they had secured the pass in fayour of the enemy, aad agaio&t themselves. OF STERNE. 81 subjects, some of them sufficiently ludi- crous. VI. The Pense6s Facetieuses de Brus- cambille have become known by Sterne's notice of them. I do not know why he should select this vulgar, gross and stupid publication, as a specimen of Mr. Shandy's library. It contains little more than the usual low jokes respecting noses ; and is indeed quite unworthy of perusal. The same observations apply to Vir. The Questions Tabariniques, which are riiere ' Jack-pudding-jokes.' VIII. The Contes et Discours d* Eutrapel, by Noel du Fail, are much in the style of Bouchet, but with less reading. His pictures of ancient rural manners, in France, before the vices of the " court began to affect the provinces, are extremely curious and interesting. Vol. I. au ILLUSTBATIONS rnrtO CHAPTER IV. , ,^^ Other' writers imitated by Steime Burton Bacon Blount Montaigne Bishop Hall. oTERNE was no friend to gravity, for which he had very good reasons ; it was a quality which excited his disgust, even in authors who lived in times that exacted an appearance of it. Like the manager in the Farce,* he sometimes " took the best part of their tragedy to put it into his own comedy." Previous to the Reformation, great latitude in manners was assumed by the clergy. Bandello, who published three volumes * The Critic. OF STERNE. 83 of talcs, in which he often laid aside decorum, was a bishop; and perhaps some of Sterne's friends expected him to become one also, without considering tiie severity of conduct required in pro- teslant prelates. His friend Hall has run the parallel to my hands. Why may'nt Bandello have a rap ? Why may'nt I imitate Bandello ? There never was a prelate's cap Bestow'd upon a droller fellow. Like TnisTRAM in mirth delighting j Like Tristram a pleasant writer ; Like his, I hope that Tristram's writing Will be rewarded with a mitre.* Sterne has contrived to give a ludicrous turn to those passages which he took from Burton's Anatomy of Melajicholy, a book, once the favourite of the learned and the witty, and a source of surrep- titious learning to many others besides our author.-f- I had often wondered at * Zachary's Tale, t See note IL F 2 S4 ILLUSTRATIONS the pains bestowed by Sterne in ridi- culing opinions not fashionable in his time, and had thought it singular, that be should produce the portrait of his sophist, Mr. Shandy, with all the stains and mouldiness of the last century about him. I am now convinced that most of the singularities of that character were drawn from the perusal of Burton. The strange title of Tristram Shandy and the assumption of the name of Yorick, were probably suggested by a passage in Burton's preface, where he apologizes for styling himself Democrinis junior, and fou his title-page '* If the title and inscription offend your gravity, were it a sufficient justifi- cation to accuse others, I could produce many sober treatises, even sennons them- selves, which in their fronts carry more fantastical names. Howsoever it is a kind of policy in these days, to prefix a fan- tiislical title to a book which is to be sold : for as larks come down to a day- o.lOF^ STERNE. 85 npt,.mahy vain readers will tarry and stand gazing, like silly passengers, at an antic picture in apainter's shop, that will not look at a judicious piece." The hint respecting sermons was not lost upon Sterne. The Anatomy of Melancholy, i\iou^\ written on a regular plan, consists chiefly pf quotations : the author has honestly termed it a cento. He collects, under every division, the opinions of a. multi- tude of writers, without regard to chro- nological order, and has too often the modesty to decline the interposition of his own sentiments. Indeed the hulk of his materials generally overwhelms him. In the course of his folio, he has con- trived to treat a great variety of topics, that seem very loosely connected with the general subject, and, like Baylc, when he starts a favourite train of quota- tions, he does not scruple to let the digression outrun the principal question. Thus from the doctrines of religion to F-3 88 ILLUSTRATIONS military discipline, from inland naviga- tion to the morality of dancing-schools, every thing is discussed and determined. In his introductory address to the rea* der, where he indulges himself in an Utopian sketch of a perfect government (with due homage previously paid to the character of James I.), we find the origin of Mr. Shandy *s notions on this subject. The passages are too long to be tran- scribed. The quaintness of many of his divi* sions seems to have given Sterne the hint of his ludicrous titles to several chapters; and the risible effect of Burton's grave endeavours to prove indisputable facts by weighty quotations, he has happily caught, and sometimes well burlesqued. The archness which Burton displays oc- casionally, and his indulgence of playful digressions from the most serious discus- sions, oi'ten give his style an air of familiar conversation, notwithstanding the laborious collections which supply his OF STERNE. 8? text. He was capable of writing excel- lent poetry, but he seems to have culti- vated this talent too little. The English verses prefixed to his book, which possess beautiful imagery, and great sweetness of versification, have been frequently published. His Latin elegiac verses, ad- dressed to his book, shew a very agreeable turn for raillery. When the force of the subject opens his own vein of prose, we discover valu- able sense and biilliant expression. Such is his account of the first feelings of me- lancholy persons, written, probably, from his own experience. " Most pleasant it is, at first, to such as are melancholy given, to lie in bed whole days, and keep their chambers ; to walk alone in some solitary grove, betwixt wood and water, by a brook side, to meditate upon some delightsome and pleasant subject, which shall affect them most ; amebilis insania, and mentis gralissimus error : a most incomparable delight it is so to F 4 88 ILLUSTRATIONS melancholize and build casdes in the air, to go smiling to themselves, acting an infinite variety of parts, which they sup- pose, and strongly imagine they repre- sent, or Uiat they see acted or done.**** So delightsome these toys are at first, they could spend whole days and nights without sleep, even whole years alone in such contemplations and fantastical meditations, which are like unto dreams, and they will hardly be drawn from them, or willingly interrupted ; so plea- sant their vain conceits are, that they hinder their ordinary tasks and necessary business, they cannot address themselves to them, or almost to any study or em- ployment. These fantastical and be- witching thoughts so covertly, so feel- ingly, so urgently, so continually set upon, creep in, insinuate, possess, over- come, distract, and detain them ; they cannot, I say, go about their more ne- cessary business, stave off or extricate themselves, but are ever musing, melan- OF STERNE. 89 cholizing, stnd carried along, as he (they say) tliat is led round about a heath with a Puck in the night, they run earnestly on in this labyrinth of anxious and soli- citous melancholy meditations, and can- not well or willingly refrain, or easily leave off, winding and unwinding them- selves, as so many clocks, and still pleas- ing their humoiu'S, until at last the scene is turned upon a sudden, by some bad object, and they, being now habituated to such vain meditations and solitary places, can endure no company, can ruminate of nothing but harsh and dis- tasteful subjects. Fear, sorrow, suspicion, mbmsticus pudor, discontent, cares, and weariness of life surprise them in a mo- ment, and they can think of nothing else, continually suspecting. No sooner are their eyes open, but this infernal plague or melancholy seizeth on them, and terrifies their souls, representing some dismal object to their minds, which now by no means, no labour, no persuasions 90 ILLUSTRATIONS they can avoid : haret lateri lethalis arundo."* This passage should be care- fully read by young persons of fine taste and delicate sentiments, for it contains a just account of the first inroads of melan- choly on susceptible imaginations. No- thing is more seductive, or more ha- zardous to minds of this cast, than that kind of mental luxury, which is gene- rally called castle-building. It appears a liappy privilege to possess the direction of an ideal world, into which we can withdraw at pleasure, when disgusted with the gross material scene before us. But in this fairy-land lurk terrible phan- toms, ready to seize the incautious wan- derer, in moments of dejection and weak- ness, and to deprive him for ever of ease and liberty. Burton has introduced a great part of these ideas into his poetical abstract of melancholy. * Anatomy of Melancholy, p. 52, 53. My copy b the eighth edition, 1676. The first edition vras published in 1617. OF STERNE. W When I go musing all alone. Thinking of divefs things fore-known. When I build castles in thg air. Void of sorrow, void of fear. Pleasing myself with phantoms sweet, Methinks the time runs very fleet. All my joys to this are foily. Nought so sweet as melancholy. When 1 go walking all alone. Recounting what I have ill done. My thoughts on me then tyranize. Fear and sorrow me surprLse ; Whether I tarry still or go, Methinks the time runs very slow : All ray griefs to this are jolly. Nought so iad as melancholy. When to myself I act and smile. With pleasing thoughts the time beguile. By a brook-side, or wood so green. Unheard, unsought for, and unseen, A thousand pleasures do me bless. And crown my soul with happiness. All my joys beside are folly. None so sweet as melancholy, &c.* * The resemblance between these verses, and Mil- ton's Allegro and Penseroso, has been noticed by Mr, Warton. One line in the former. The Cynosure of neighbouting eyes, was probably suggested by the following passage m Burton ; * !She is his Cynosure, Hesperus, and Vesper, his morning and evening star-" p. 316, 2 ILLUSTRATIONS The first four chapters of Tristram Shandy, are founded on some passages in Burton, which I shall transcribe. Sterne's improvements I shall leave to the reader's recollection. " Filii ex senibus nati raro sunt firmi temperamenti, &:c. Nam spiritus cere- bri si tum mal6 afficiantur, tales procre- ant, & quales fuerint affectus, tales fili- orum, ex triscibus tristes, ex jucundis jucundi nascuntur. [Cardan.] " If she (the mother) be over-dull, heavy, angry, peevish, discontented, and melancholy, not only at the time of conception, but even all the while she carries the child in her womb (saith Fernelius) her son will be so likewise, and worse, as Lem- nius adds, &c. So many ways are we plagued and punished for our father's defaults ; * insomuch that as Fer- nelius truly saith, it is the greatest part of our felicity to be well-born, and it were happy for human kind,-f- if only This idea runs through Tristram Shandy, f See Tristram Shandy, vol. viii. chap. 33. OF STERNE. 93 such parents as arc sound of body and mind should be suffered to marry. Quanto id diUgentius in procreandis liberis observandum."* I cannot help thinking, that tlie first chapter or two of the Memoirs of Scriblerus whetted Sterne's invention, in this, as well as in other instances of Mr. Shandy's peculiarities. The forced introduction of the sneer at the term non-naluralsj-f- used in medicine, * Anat. of Melanch. p. 37. edit. 1676. Quanto id diligentius in liberis procreandis caven- dum, sayeth Cardan. Tris. Shandy, vol. vi. ch. 33. Among a number of pamphlets, which appeared after the first two volumes of Tristram, one is entitled ' The Clock-maker's Outcry against the Author of the Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy." He complains that the concluding part of Sterne's first chapter, had rendered it indelicate to mention the winding up of clocks; but he has not treated the idea happily. I strongly suspect, that Sterne took the incident alluded to, from the * Description of a Country Life,' in the supplementary volume to Tom Brown's works. t Tris. Shandy, vol. i. chap. 23. '* Why the most natural actions of a man's life should be called his non- naturals, is another question." See Burton, p. 39. Tlie solution might be easily given, if it were worth repeating. Dr Burton, of York, published a book onr this subject, which is here alluded te. f4 ILLUSTRATIONS leads us back to Burton, who has insisted largely and repeatedly, on the abuse of the functions so denominated. It is very singular, that in the intro- duction to the Fragment on Whiskers, which contains an evident copy, Sterne sliould take occasion to abuse plagiarists. " Shall we for ever make new books, as apothecaries make new mixtures, by pouring only out of one vessel into ano- ther? Are we for ever to be twisting and untwisting the same rope ? for ever in the same track for ever at the same pace ? And it is more singular that all this declamation should be taken, word for word, from Burton's introduction. " As ApothecaneSf we make new mixtures every day, pour out of one vessel into ano- ther ; and as those old Romans robbed all the cities of the itorld, to set out their bad- sited Rome, tee ski}n off the cream of other men's wits, pick the choice flowers of their tilled gardens, to set out our own sterile plots.^" Again, " JVe weave the same * Barton, p. 4. OF STERNE. 9t web still, twist the. s^me rope again and again.*** >' *. '- " Who made MAN, with powers which dart him from earth to heaven in a mo- ment that great, that most excellent, and most noble creature of the world the miracle of nature, as Zoroaster in his book wE/'t Pcr5 called him the Shekinah of the Divine presence, as Chrysostom - the image of God, as Moses r-the my of Divinity, as Plato the marvel of mar- vels, as Aristotle-^to go sneaking on at this pitiful, pimping, petty fogging rate ?"-{ Who would suspect this heroic strain to be a plagiarism ? yet such it is un- doubtedly ; and from the very first para- graph of the Anatomy of Melancholy. \ Many says Burton, the most excellent and noble creature of the world, the prin* cipal and mighty work of God, wonder of nature, as %oroasles calls him ; audacis nature miraculum ; the marvel of marvels, * lb. p. 5. I Tristram Shandy, Yol, v, chap- i. X Page!. 9(5 ILLUSTRATIONS as Plato ; the abridgment and epitome of the world, as Pliny ; microcosmiis, a little world, a model of the world, sovereign lord of the earth, viceroy oj the world, sole commander and governor of all the creatures in it *****, created of God's own image, to that immortal and incorporeal substance, with all the faculties and powers belonging to it, was at first pure, divine, perfect, happy, Kc. " One denier, cried the order of mercy one single denier, in behalf of a thou- sand patient captives, whose eyes look towards heaven and you for their re- demption. "' The Lady Baussiere rode on. ' Pity the unhappy, said a devout, venerable, hoary-headed man, meekly holding up a box, begirt with iron, in his withered hands I beg for the unfor- tunate good, my lady, *t is for a prison for an hospital 't is for an old man a poor man undone by shipwreck, by suretyship, by firc^ I call God and all his angels to witness 't is to clothe the OF STERNE. 97 naked to feed the hungry 't is to com- fort the sick and the broken-hearted. " The Lady Baussiere rode on. " A decayed kinsman bowed himself to the ground. " The Lady Baussiere rode on. " He ran begging bare-headed on one side of her palfrey, conjuring her by the former bonds of friendship, alliance, con- sanguinity, &c. cousin, aunt, sister, mo- ther for virtue's sake, for your own, for mine, for Christ's sake, remember me pity me. " The Lady Baussiere rode on." * The citation of the original passage from Burton will confirm all I have said of his style. ** A poor decayed kinsman of his sets upon him bj/ the way in all his jollity, and runs begging bare-headed by him, conjuring him by those former bonds of friendship, alliance, consanguinity, STc. uncle, cousin, brother, father, "shew some pity for * Tristram Shandy, vol, v. chap. i. Vol. I. G ys ILLUSTRATIONS Christ*s sake, pity a sic/c man, an old man, S(c. he cares not, ride on : pretend sickness, inevitable loss of limbs, plead suretyship, or shipwreck, fires, common calamities, shew thy wants and imperfections, swear, protest, take God and all his angels to wit- ness, qucere peregrinum, thou art a counter- feit crank, a cheater, he is not touched with it, pauper ubique jacet, ride on, he takes no notice oj it. Put up a supplication to him in the name of a thousand orphans, an hospital, a spittle, a prison as he goes by, they cry out to liim for aid : ride on . Shew him a decayed liaven, a bridge, a school, a fortification, 8Cc. or some public work ; ride on. Good your worship, your lionour, for God's sake, your country's sake : ride on,'' * This curious copy is followed up in Tristram Shandy, by a chapter, and that a long one, written almost entirely from Burton. It is the consolation of Mr. Shandy, on the death of brother Bobby. * Anat. of Melanch. p. 269. 'OF STERNE. .m " When Agrippina was told of her son's death, Tacitus informs us, that, not being able to moderate the violence of her pas- sions, she abruptly broke off her work." This quotation did not come to Sterne from 1 acitus. " Mezeiitius would not live after his son And Pompey's wife cried out at the nezvs of her husband's death, Turpe mori post ie, 8Cc. as Tacitus of Agrippina, nxit able to moderate Aer pas- sions. So when she heard her son was slain, she abruptly broke off her work, changed countenance and colour^ tore her hair, and fell a roaring downright .'' * v^^v*T is either Plato," says Sterne, " or Plutarch, or Seneca, or Xenophon, or Epictetus, or Theophrastus, or Lucian or some one, perhaps of later date either Cardan, or Budaeus, or Petrarch, or Stella or possibly it may be some divine or father of the church, St. Austin^ pi St. Cyprian, or Bernard, who affirms, that it is an irresistible and natural pas- 'ipj;:j * An?Lt. of Melanch. p. 213. t Tristram Shandy, vol. v. chap. 3. G 3 102 ILLUSTRATIONS " 'T is an inevitable chance, the Jirst statute in Magna Charta, an everlasting act of Parliament, all must die,*'^M *)f*M'v.> wJf When Tully was bereft of his dear daughter TuUia, at first he laid it to his heart he listened to the voice of nature, and modulated his own unto it. Sec, But as c^on as he began to look into the stores of philosophy, and consider how many excellent things might be said upon the occasion nobody upon earth can conceive, says the great orator, how joy- ful, how happy it made me/' -j- ,'}'** Tully was much grieved for his daugh- ter Tulliola's death at first, until such time that lie had confirjned his mind with some philosophical precepts, then he began to tri- umph, over fortune and grief, and for her reception into heaven to be much more joyed than before he was troubled for her loss.'*\'. -; Sterne is uncharitable here to poor Cicero. f .;>;L j<^i4t Ui,- * Ahat. of Melanch. p. 215* t Slerne. f Burton. OF STERNE. io3 ' 4^' Kingdoms and provinces, and towns and cities, have they not their periods ? Where is Troy, and Mycene, and Thel)es, and Delos, and PersepoUs, and Agrigen- tum. What is become, brother Toby, of Nineveh and Babylon, of Cyzicum and Mytilene ; the fairest towns that ever the sun rose upon, are noA^ no more."* " Kingdoms, provinces, cities, and towns, ' says Burton, " have their periods, and are consumed. In those fiomishing times of Troy, Mycene was the fairest city in Greece, but it, alas, and that Assyrian Ninive are quite overthrown. The like fate hath that Egyptian and Boeotian Thebes, Delos, the common council-house of Greece, and Babylon, the greatest city that ever the sun shone on, hath now nothing but walls and rubbish left.'' And where is Troy itself now, PersepoUs, Carthage, Cizicum, Sparta, Argos, and all those Grecian ci- ties ? Syracuse and Agrigenium, the fair- est towns in Sicily, which had sometimes * Sterne. G 4 104 ILLUSTRATIONS seven hundred thousand inhabitants, are now decayed,*' Let us follow Sterne again. ** Return- ing out of Asia, when I sailed from iEgina towards Megara, I began to view the country round about, ^gina was behind me, Megara was before, Pyraeus on the right hand, Corinth on the left. What flourishing towns now prostrate on the earth ! Alas ! alas ! said I to myself, that a man should disturb his soul for the loss of a child, when so much as this lies awfully buried in his presence. Re- member, said I to myself again remem- ber that thou art but a man." This is, with some slight variations. Burton's translation of Servius's letter. Sterne alters just enough, to shew that he had not attended to the original. Bur- ton's version follows. * Returning out of Asia, when I sailed from Mgina towards Megara, I began to view the country round about, ^gina was behind me, Megara before, Pyrmis on the OF STERNE. 105 right hand, Corinth on the left; what flou- risMng toivns heretoforCy now prostrate and overwhelmed before mine eyes ? Alas, why are we men so much disquieted with the departure of a friend, whose life is much shorter? when so many goodly cities lie buried before us. Rernember, O Servius thou art a man ; and ivith that I was much confirmed, and corrected myself.''* " My son is dead," says Mr. Shandy, *' so much the better,* *t is a shame in such a tempest, to have but one anchor." /, but he was my most dear and loving friend, quoth Burton, viy sole friend Thou maist be ashamed, I say with Seneca, to confess it, in such a tempest as this, to have but one anchor. " But, continues Mr. Shandy, " he is gone for ever from us ! be it so. He is got from under the hands of his barber before he was bald. He is but risen from a feast before he was surfeited from a banquet before he had got druken. The * This is an aukward member of the sentence. 106 ILLUSTRATIONS Thracians wept when a child was born, and feasted and made merry when a man went out of tlie world, and with reason. Is it not better not to hunger at all, than to eat ? not to thirst, than to take physic to cure it ? Is it not better to be freed from cares and agues, love and melan- choly, and the other hot and cold fits of life,* than, like a galled traveller, who comes weary to his inn, to be bound to begin his journey afresh ?" I shall follow Burton's collections as they stand in his own order.-f- " Tliou dost him great injury to desire his longer life. Wilt thou have him crazed and sickly stillf like a tired traveller that comes weary to his imiy begin his journey afresh? He is now gone to eternity as if he had risen, saith Pmtarch, from the midst of a * This approaches to one of Shakespeare's happy expressions : Duncan is in his grave : After life's fitful fever he sleeps well. t Sterne has commonly reversed the arrangement, which produces a strong cflect in the comparison. OF STERNE. 107 feast before he was drunk. -^ *Is it not much better not to hunger at all, than to eat : not to thirsty than to drink to satisfy thirst ; not to be cold, than to put on clothes to diive away cold? You had more need rejoice that I am freed from diseases, agues, 8(c. The Thracians wept still when a child was born, feasted and made mirth when any man was buried: and so should we rather be glad for such as die well, that they are so happily freed from the miseries of this life.-^ Again " Consider, brother Toby, when we are, death is not, and when death is, we are not." So Burton trans- lates a passage in Seneca : Whe?i we are, death is not ; but when death is, then we are not.\ The original words are, quum nos sumus, mors non adest; cum vero mors adest, turn nos non sumus, hi\%\ - .: - * This is a mere translation from Lucian, 'ntpi IlEvds; : 8x evvozti Ss on to [jm 5ii\J/v, wo^jj KOXXtov t8 sritTv, na) to (jlyi Trsivriy, th (payeiy, xoi to fjiri piyivy ts ctfJiTrexovvi euTropiiv, Burton has quoted his author fairly. t Anat. of Mel. p. 316. j P. 213. 108 ILLUSTRATIONS " For this reason, continued my father, 't is worthy to recollect, how Httle altera- tion in great men the approaches of death have made. Vespasian died in a jest Galba with a sentence Septimius Severus in a dispatch ; Tiberius in dissimulation, and Caesar Augustus in a compliment." This conclusion of so remarkable a chap- ter is copied, omitting some quotations, almost verbatim, from Lord Verulam's Essay on death. Sterne has taken two other passages from this short essay : " There is no terror, brother Toby, in its looks, but what it borrows from groans and convul- sions and the blowing of noses, and the wiping away of tears with the bot- toms of curtains in a dying man's room." Thus Bacon Groans and convulsions ^ and discoloured face^ and friends weepingy and blacks, and obsequies, and the like, shew death terrible. Again, Corporal Trim, in his harangue, " in hot pursuit, the wound itself which brings him is not felt." Bacon says, lie that dies in an earnest pur- OF STERNE. 109 suit, is like one that is wounded in hot blood, who for the time scarce feels the hurt, v>i[ Among these instances of remarkable deaths, I am surprised that the curious story of Cardinal Bentivoglio did not occur to Sterne. When the Cardinal entered the conclave, after the death of Urban VIII. he was unfortunately lodged in the chamber next to one who slept and snored quantum poterat, says Eryth- raeus, all night long. Poor Bentivoglio, worn down to a shadow by his literary pursuits, and his disappointments, and already but too wakeful, passed eleven nights without sleep, by the snoring of his neighbour; when symptoms of fever appearing, he was removed to a more quiet room, in which he soon finished his days.* We must have recourse to Burton again, for part of the Tristra-Ptedia. ** O blessed health ! cried my father, making an exclamation, as he turned over the leaves to the next chapter, * Jan. Nic. Erythroe. Piaacothec* alter, p. 37. no ILLUSTRATIONS thou art above ail gold and treasure ; 't is thou who enlargest the soul, and openest all its powers to receive instruction, and to relish virtue. He that has thee, has' little more to wish for; and he that is so wretched as to want thee, ^warrts every thing with thee.'' * /-'^no- -ii invvir.. O blessed health ! says Burton, thou art above all gold and treasure; [Ecclesiast.] the poor man's richeSy the rich man's bliss, without thee there can be no happiness. -f O beata sanitas, te presente amcenum Ver floret gratiis, absque te nemo beatus. ^i^ But I should, in order, have notice.d first an exclamation at the end of chap-" ter IX. in the spirit of which hd' Bbdy could expect Sterne to be original, t * Chap, xxxiil. vol. v. ^ t Page 104. Ibid, page 276;::)! j^'UiU t V/ X It has indeed been expressed, with singular warmth and beauty, by Aristophanes : firi ^SovEi TaTfiv veai&t. ^ ' TO Tpv^spov yap ffAne^uus ;?>tJ>iT: TOKTit a7ra>^t( /ittpiovi, , e. 1. 900. OF STERNE, III " Now I love you for this and 't is this delicious mixture within you, which makes you, dear creatures, what you are and he who hates you for it all I can say of the matter is. That he has a pump- kin for his head, or a pippin for his heart, and whenever he is dissected 't will he found so." Burton's quotation is: ^ui vim non sensit amoris, aut lapis est, aut bellua: which he translates thus : He is not a man, a block, a very stone, aut Numen, aut Nebuchadnezzar, he Jiath a gourd for his head, a pippin for his heart, that hath not felt the power of it. In chap, xxxvi. vol. VI. Sterne has picked out a few quotations from Burton's Essay on Love-Melancholy,* which af- ford nothing very remarkable, except Sterne's boldness in quoting quotations. By help of another extract -f- from Bur- ton, Sterne makes a great figure as a curious reader : " I hate to make mys- * See Burton, p. 310. & seq. ,^-_ t Trist, Shandy, vol, vii, chap. xi. 112 ILLUSTRATIONS teries of nothing ; 't is the cold cautious- ness of one of those htlle souls from which Lcssius (lib. xiii. de moribus divinis, ch. xxiv.) has made his estimate, wherein he setteth forth, That one Dutch mile, cubicaliy multiplied, will allow room enough, and to spare, for eight hundred thousand millions, which he supposes to be as great a number of souls (counting from the fall of Adam) as can possibly be damn'd to the end of the world. I am much more at a loss to know what could be in Franciscus Ribera's liead^ who pretends that no less a space than one of two hundred Italian miles, multi- plied into itself, will be sufficient to hold the like number he certainly must have gone upon some of the old Roman souls," iVc. The succeeding raillery is very well, but unfair with respect to the mathe- matical theologist, as the original passage will prove. " Franciscus Ribera, in cap. 14-. Apocab/ps. xvHi have hell a material OF STERNE. 113 and local fire in the centre of the earthy two hundred Italian miles in diameter^ as he defines it out of those words, Exivit sanguis de terra per Stadia mille sexcenta, 8(c. But LessiuSj lib. xiii. de moribus divinis, cap. 24. will have this local hell far less, one Dutch mile in diameter , all filled with fire and brimstone; because, as he there demonstrates, that space cubically multiplied will ?nake a sphere able to hold eight hundred thousand millions of damned bodies, (allow- ing each body six foot square) which will abundantly suffice." [I believe the damned, upon Lessius's scheme, would be less crouded, than the victims of the African slave-trade have often been, on the middle passage.] " Cum cerium sit, inqidt, facta subductiojie, iwn futuros centies mille milli- ones damnandorum." * Lucian, in his Necyomantia, allows^ only a foot to each of the shades ; but the opponents of some late acts of the * Anat. of Melanch. p. 156. Vol. I. H 114 ILLUSTRATIONS legislature must not pride themselves iu his patronage. He supposed the tenants of his more merciful hell to be only skeletons, of the shadows, which had accompanied the natural bodies of men upon earth.* Again, at the end of the same chapter in Tristram Shandy ; " but where am I ? and into what a delicious riot of things am 1 rushing ? I I who must be cut short in the midst of my days," &c. Burton concludes his chapter "on Maids', Nuns', and Widows* Melancholy," in the same manner. ** But where am I ? inlo tv/iat subject have I nishedf What have I to dor'f STc. The preface to Tristj'am, which Is whimsically placed near the end of the third volume, contains another of Bur- ton's sallies. " Lay hold of me, I am giddy 1 am stone-Wind I 'm dying I am gone Help ! help ! help !" AsrafTsj yap arsx^^i eOttfi^ii yivovTM o/5(o<, rcov orsuv t Pagf; 121-. 0"F STERNE. li.'i Burtort, iii liis Digression of Air y stop's himself ill a metaphysical ramble, in tlie same manner. But, hob ! I am now gone quite out of sight : I am almost giddy with 7wi?ig about. It was observed to me by Mr. Isaac Read, that Sterne had made use of the notes to Blount's Translation of PhiloS' tratus. The most striking resemblances are contained in fitount's Observations on t)eath, in which he has copied nearly the whole of Lord Verulam's Essay on that subject. Blount also declared war against gravity of manners, and there are many eccentricities scattered through his annotations (which are almost as bulky as the explanatory notes to our modern poems) that Sterne had turned to his own account, though it is difficult to trace them distinctly^/'""" I shall just observe by the way, that a pretty passage in the Story of the King of Bohemia and his seven -castles ; " MO- DESTY scarce touches with a finger what ,110 ILLUSTRATIONS Liberality offers her with both her hands open" alludes to a pieture o Guide's, the design of which it describes tolerably well. Retournons a iios moiitons, as Rabelais would say ; in matters of painting, it is dangerous for a man to trust his own eyes^ till he has taken his degree of Connoisseur. It confirms me strongly in the belief that the character of Mr. Shandy is a personification of the authorship of Bur- ton, when I find such a passage as the following in Sterne. " There is a Phi- lippic in verse on some body's eye or other, that for two or three nights toge- ther had put him by his rest ; which, in his first transport of resentment against it, he begins thus : . , " A devil 't is and mischief such doth work, , | ,} As never vet did Pa"an, Jew, or Turk." This choice couplet is quoted by Bur-' ton* from some bad poet, now unknown,- * Pa^e 331. OF STERNE. 117 of whose name he only gives the initials. " Hilarion the hermit, in speaking of his abstinence, his watchings, flagella- tions, and other instrumental parts of his religion, would say though with more facetiousness than became an hermit That they were the means he used, to make his ass (meaning his body) leave off kicking." * " By this means Hilarion made his ass, as he called his own bodi/y leave kicking (so Hierome relates of him in his life) when the Devil tempted him to any foid offence '^\ " I wish, Yorick, said my father, you had read Plato ; for there you would have learnt that there are two LovES of these loves, according to Ficinus's comment upon Velasius, the one is ra- tional the other is natural the first ancient without mother where Venus has nothing to do : the second, begotten of Jupiter and Dione "J * Tris. Shandy, vol. viii. chap..a^x|>' f Burton, p. %i'i. [ 1 + Tris. Shandy, vol. viii. chap, xxxiii. H 3 118 ILLUSTRATIONS * One Verms is ancient, without a mother, and descended from heaven, whom we call coelestiai. The younger begotten of Jupita' and Dione, whom co?nmonli/ vi}C call Venus. JFlcinus, in his comment upton this place, cap. 8. following Plato, called these two loves, two devils, or good and had angels according to us, which are still hovering about our souls. -f Mr. Shandy observes, 911 \i\s son's circumcision, that the tfine and sextile asp9gts have jupiped awry. This is tak^n tVom Burton.^ Many o^her small pla- giarisms might be noticed, but I shall cojjifiue my observ^^ipns^ \o, thpse of inpi;^ conscquciice. 1 . * -, The fragment respecting the Abdc- ritans, in the Sentimental Journey, is taKea from Burton's chapter of Artificial Allure?ncnts, \\ At Abdcra in Thrace, (says Burton) Andromeda, one of J^uripides' tra- * Vela&ius is quoted through all the preceding passages in Burton, \ Page 260. X Page 26 J. Objects of Lorc^ II Page 301. OF STERNE. 1 19 ^edies being played, the spectators were so much moved ivith the object, and those pathetical speeches of Perseus, among the rest, O Cupid, prince of gods and men, S(c. that evejy man almost, a good while after, spake pure iambics, and raved still 07i Per- seus' s speech, O Cupid, prince of gods and men. As car-'men, boys, and prentices, when a new song is published with us, go singing that new tune still in the streets, they continually acted that tragical part of Perseus, and in every man's mouth teas, O Cupid, in every street, O Cupid, in every house almost, O Cupid, prince of gods and men ; pronouncing still, like stage-players, O Cupid, They were so possessed all with tJmt rapture, and thought of that pathetical love-speech, they could not, a long time after, forget, or drive it out of their minds, but, ' O Cupid, prince of gods and men, was ever in their moutlis. Why Stein e should have called this a fragment, I cannot imagine; unless, as Burton forgot to quote his author, Sterne was not aware that the H 4 120 ILLUSTRATIONS Story was taken from the introduction to Lucian's Essay on the Method of Writing History. Burton has spoiled this passage hy an unfaithful translation. Sterne has worked it up to a beautiful picture, but very different from the original in Lucian, with which, I am persuaded, he was unacquainted. That part of Mr. Shandy's letter to Uncle Toby, which consists of obsolete medical practices, is taken from one of Burton's chapters on the cure of Love- Melancholy.* Gordonius's prescription of a severe beating for the cure of love, seems to have entertained Sterne greatly. This remedy was once a favourite with phy- sicians, in the cure of many diseases : there was then good reason for giving Birch a place in the dispensatories. To say nothing of Luther's practice in the * Anatomy of Melancholy, p. 333, to iiS. OF STERNE. 121 case of his maid -servant, which I shall have occasion to mention afterwards, wc find in the Appendix to Wepfer's Historic^ apoplecticoiimiy an account of a soldier, who prevented'an attack of the apoplexy., by flogging himself, till blood ran freely from his back and nostrils. Oribasius, one of the virtuosi of that time, wrote to recommend whipping in fevers. Dr. Musgrfive quotes a German physician, who cured two of his patients of dysen- tery, by drubbing them as much as was sufficient.* The practice of these terrible doctoi*s among unfortunate lunatics, is too noto- rious. One of them directs the applica- tion for love-melancholy in this elegant manner, in his book ; sijuveiiis est, flagel- letur ejus cuius cum verberibus,^ et si nori sistity ponatur in fundo turris cum pane et aqua, SCC. -iM m >^?vi7M; ; Campanella tells a curious story of an Italian prince, an excellent musician, * Of the qualities of the nerves, p. J38. t Meibomius, p. 5, et seq. lot ILLUSTRATIONS qui alvum deponcre non poterat, nisi verbe- ratus a servo ad id adscito* I omit many other prescriptions of the same kind. These instances are sufficient to estabhsh tlie predilection of the facuhy for this practicc-f which Butler has so highly celebrated for its moral tendency ; Whipping that 's virtue's governess, Tui'ress of arts and sciences ; That mends the gross mistakes of natur*;. And puts new life into dull matter ; That lays foundation for renown. And all the honours of the gown.t Peter 1. of Russia seems to have adopted this philosophy, for we are assured that he was accustomed to cane his ministers and courtiers, for high mis^ demeanors, with his own imperial hands. * Idem. ' >.'.-. . - f I observe that the practice of whipping, in medi- cine, was revived, in North America, by Dr. Seaman, who applied a horse-whip to a patient who bad taken an over-dose of opium- The method succeeded. Medical feepository. New York, voT* iii.'p. 15fr. 1799. X Hudibras, part ii. canto i. OF STERNE. 12S Sterne has made frequent references to Montaigne : the best commentary on the fifth chapter of Tristram Shandy, vol. viii. is Montaigne's essay on the subject of that chapter. Charges of Plagiarism in his Sermons have been brought against Sterne, which I have not been anxious to investigate, ^s jn that species of composition, the principal matter must consist of repeti- tions. But it has long been niy opinion, that the manner, the style, and the selec- tion of subjects for those Sermons, were derived from the excellent Contemplations ^f Bishop Hall. There is a delicacy of thought, and tenderness of expression in the good Bishop's compositions, from^ie transfusion of which Sterne looked for iinmpjftality. Let us compare that singular Sermon, entitled The Levite and his Concu- bine, with part of the Bishop's Contem- plation of the Levite's Concubine. I shall follow Stern e'ordci\ 124 ILLySTIlATK)NS " Then shame and grief go with her, and wherever she seeks a sheher, may the hand of justice shut the door against her."* ^ ^* What husband would 7wt have said She is gone J let shame and grief go with her ; I shall find one M less pleasing , and more faithful.-^ " Our annotators tell us, that in Jewish ceconomicks, these (concubines) diifered httle from the wife, except in some out* ward ceremonies and stipulations, but agreed with her in all the true essences of marriage.":]: ofi i^ : vvj^) The law of God, says the Bishop, allowed the Levite a wife ; human connivance a con- cuMne ; neither did the Jewish concubine differ from a wife, but in some outward compliments ; both might chalkfige all the inie essence of nuirriage. ^^'^^^-^^ ^^ i'*^-l ::iTiViiJ 3 n't hui^^ * Sterne. STmon ifV'iii. ' i * ' ^ ' '^ ' "^^ i Fp. Hall's WDrksi' 11. toVJ.^^' OOiiol^| Sterne loc. citat. OF STERNE. 125 I shall omit the greater part of the, Levite's solioquy, in Sterne, and only- take the last sentences. " Mercy well becomes the heart of all thy creatures, but most of thy servant, a Levite, who offers up so many daily sacrifices to thee, for the transgressions of thy people." " But to little purpose," he would add, " have I served at thy altar, where my business was to sue for mercy, had I not learn'd to practise it," Mercy ^ says Bishop Hall, becomes xvell the heart of ani/ vian, but most of a Levite. He that had helped to offer so many sacri- fices to God for the 7nultitiide of every Israelite's sins, saw how proportionable it was, that man should not hold one sin iin- pardonable. He had served at the altar to no purpose, if he (whose trade was to sue for mercy) had not at all learned to practise it. It were needless to pursue the parallel. Sterne's twelfth Sermon, on the For- giveness of Injuries, is merely a dilated J^. 12(5 ILLUSTRATIONS commentary on the beautiful conclusion of the Contemplation * of Joseph/ "^ The sixteenth SerflnOh contains a m6?t5 striking imitation. '* Th(?re is no small degree of malicious craft \t\ fixing upon a season to give a mark of enmity and ill-will ;^-a word, a look, which, af 0116 time, would make no impression^ at another time, wounds Ae heart; and like a shaft flying with the wind, piefces deep, which with its own natural force, would scarce have reached the object aimed at." *^v>in Tiiis is little varied from the origlriaf t; There is no small cruelty in the picking oiCt of a time for mischief; that word would scarce gall at one season, which at another hilleth. The sojne shaft flying with the wind pierces deep, which (tgainit it, caH hardly find strength to stick upright.^ In Sterne's fifth Sermon, the Contempla- tion of ' Elijah with the Safeptan,* is Itairs Shimei Cursing* , >-3li' OF STlfiRNK. 12V closely followed. Witness this passage out of others : * The prophet follows the call of his God : the same hand which brouglit him to the gate of the city, had led also the poor w^idow out of her doors, oppressed with sorrow."* The prophet Jollows the call of his God ; the same hand that brought him ta the gate of Sarepta, led also this poor widow out of her doars.^ The succeeding passages which corres- pond, are too long for insertion. Sterne has acknowledged his acquaint- ance with this book, by the disingenuity of two ludicrous quotations in Tristram Shandy.:]: The use which Sterne made of Burton and Hall, and his great familiarity with their works, had considerable influence on his style ; it was rendered, by assimi- lation with their's, more easy, more natural, and more expressive. Every * Sterne- t Bishop Hall, p. 1323. J Vol. i. cliap. xxii. and vol. vli,. chap, xiii. I2S ILLUSTRATIONS writer of taste and feeling must indeed be invigorated, by drinking at the " well of English undefiled;" but like the Fountain of Youth, celebrated in the old romances, its waters generally elude the utmost efforts of those who strive to ap- propriate them. my 'jt\> OF STERNE. W9 ijili 'hi viw.riMOfl] CHAPTER V. Of the personages of Tristram Shandy. Anecdotes of Doctor Slop, X HERE are some peculiarities in the principal characters of Tristram Shandy, which render it probable that Sterne copied them from real life. My en- quiries at York have thrown no light on this subject, excepting what regards the personage of Doctor Slop. From some publications which accidentally fell into my hands, I had formed a conjecture, which Dr. Bel comb assures me is sup- ported by tradition, that under this title, Sterne meaattp satirize Dr. John Burton, of York, '^'-'^'-'^'i^ >iw._^_^^%t?r*!5" Dr. Burton*s treatise on midwifery, which was published in 1751, agrees in Vol. I. I \ 130 ILLUSTRATIONS many respects with the work ascribed to Dr. Slop. It is distinguished by that zeal for the horrible mechanism of the art, which was carried to an excess at that period : the tire tele, the then newly invented forceps, and other instruments of torture and misery, appear in his sculptures ; and the whole composition is calculated to produce, in unprofessional readers, mingled sensations of ridicule and disgust. The squabble between Dr. Burton and Dr. Smellie is clearly referred to, in/ Tristram Shandy, vol. ii. p. 1 19. Smellie, who was an ignorant man, mistook the> head-piece of a print, in a collection of obstetrical - works, for the name of an^ author, and quoted* Lit hop^edus Senonensis with much gravity. >axifi yza . . r ' . I , J. ,, - . . ^ ' , i . < * *' The seventeenth author, collected, as you tell " u, by Spachiiis, is Lithopwdus Senonejtsis, which *' instead of being an author, is only the drawing of a ' petrified child, when taken from its mother, after " she was opened ; and this is evident from the title, *' Luhopadii Seno7iensis Icoii, which,' with the expla- " ttation, ^, contained in one single page only " Burton's Letter to Stnellie, p. 21. OF STERNE. 13t. Dr. Burton wrote a treatise, also, on the Non-Naturals, which provoked a sneer from Sterne.* Neither of these works would afford extracts capable of interesting, even me- dical readers, at the present time. But I am in possession of two pamphlets, relating to this author, which place his character in a different point of view, and which, perhaps, had some share in exciting the severity of Sterne. By the first of these, which was pub- lished at York, in 174'9, by Dr. Burton himself, it appears that he had been a zealous Jacobite ; and that, in IT^S, he was committed to the casde of York, on suspicion of high treason. Dr. Sterne, then Archdeacon of Cleveland, was one of the magistrates who committed him, * Tris. Shandy, vol. i. chap- 23." Why the most natural actions of a man^s life should be called his non- naturals, is another question." See Burton, page 39* The solution might be easily given, if it were worth repeating. Dr. Burton of Yoffk published a book on this subject, which is here alluded to. I 2 132 ILLUSTRATIONS of whom he speaks with singular asperity, though his own conduct appears to have been very suspicious. It seems, from his own account, that when the rebel army was advancing towards Lancashire, in 17 45, Dr. Burton was seen with a party of them at Hornby, Hq accounts for this, by asserting that he was with them as a prisoner ; but as he had left York, apparently to throw him- self in their way, and as he returned unmolested, it cannot be surprizing that, in such a fearful and anxious time, he should be thrown into confinement. Dr. Burton, however, imputes his arrest to animosities, excited by his activity, in a contested election for the county, and labours to persuade the reader, that Brit- ish liberty was endangered by his deten- tion. Perhaps a specimen of Dr. Slop's style may not be unacceptable. ** On December the 3d, Dr. Sterne " published a paragraph in one of the " newspapers, which was reprinted in " the London Evening Post, and is as OF STERNE. 133 " follows, viz. on Saturday last Dr. Bur- * ton was committed to York castle by " the Recorder and Dr. Sterne, as Justices " for the West Riding of this county. " It appearing from his own confession " that he went to Hornby, knowing the ** Rebels were there, and upon a sup- " position that the Duke of Perth was ** there, wrote a letter to him which " being opened by Lord Elcho he was " sent for up by two Highlanders to the ** castle, and as he says carried along " with them as a prisoner to Lancaster, " where he conversed with Lord George " Murray and a person called his royal " highness Prince Charles. There was " the greatest satisfaction expressed at his *' commitment from the highest to the *' lowest person in the city, that has been '* known here upon any occasion." In '* my remarks upon this paragraph I " shall consider it under three articles. " First, as to my being committed for ** matters of high treason, as mentioned 1 3 131. ILLUSTRATIONS " on the back of the warrant of detainer. "Secondly, as to confessing I had " been with the Rebels ; and " Thirdly, as to the great rejoicings " among all degrees of people of all " parties. ** First, that I was not committed for " high treason, I need bring no other " proof than the commitment itself " wherein it was only said " I was a * suspicious person to his Majesty's " government." Dr. Sterne also wrote " several letters to his acquaintance, " wherein he said I was committed for " high treason, I can mention some to " whom they were wrote, and others to " whom they were shown. Dr. Sterne " also told a gentleman who was at his " home, that had I a thousand lives, he " (S n) had as much treason there *^ (pointing to a table whereon lay a " heap of papers) as would take them " all. . " There are two ways to come at the ^^ OF STERNE. 135 " truth in treasonable practices, the one /^ is by positive proof, (which in case of f* high treason is absolutely required), or ** by the party accused own confession. " Now it is evident neither of these ap- -" peared against me, notwithstanding " one of the most malicious and strict " scrutinies that party rage could suggest. ?< . S n here brings a heavy charge " upon himself, for had he such proofs " of my being guilty of high treason (as " he declared to Mr. B d) why did " he not produce them? and any one " who has proof of another's being " guilty of high treason, and conceals " it, falls under the heavy penalty of " mis-prision of treason, so that he is " under that dilemma of being guilty of " spreading the greatest falsehood, or of *' mis-prision of treason. "I shall now proceed to the second *^ article, and shew how he has mis- ^^ represented things by asserting that I <*^ confessed I had been with the Re- 14 136 ILLUSTRATIONS ** bels. S n would intimate to the " world that I had confessed I had been " with the Rebels to join aid and assist " them, I'll appeal to every man*s own " breast, whether he would.not absolutely ** take it in that light from S ^'sman- " ner of expressing himself. : " I must observe to this upright man, " that in every confession (for so he was ** pleased to call the account of what " befel me as above) the sense and mean- " ing of the whole must be taken toge- " ther. It is not our business to pick " out a part of a sentence, or a few " words, and apply them to what pur- ** pose we please, for by that method I " could bring words to prove from the " New Testament that Dr. S n ought " to be hanged here and damned herc- " after. As D. S n had undertook " to tell a part as truth, he should have " told the truth and nothing but the ** truth, he should have told the legality ** of my call into that neighbourhood OF STERNE. liS? '* where I was taken prisoner, and the ** necessity of my going there, &c. and ** then he would not have been to blame. " I come now to the conclusion of this *' ever memorable paragraph where S n " says that on this occasion, meaning " my commitment, there was the greatest " rejoicings by all degrees of people of " all parties ever known upon any occa- " sion. \.i. i.1;. .i;.| i^:,j! . " Here again S " n has mis-repre- " sented the truth as was evident to all *' the inhabitants of the city of York and " neighbourhood, nay, his own printer's "journeyman, or servant, whose bread " depended upon S n, was so con- " scious to himself, that every person '* who were then acquainted with me " must know that part of the paragraph " to be false, and therefore begged leave " to omit it, but S n ordered him to ' print it as he had wrote it. " How I became then so popular h * properer for another pen to shew than 138 ILLUSTRATIONS " mine, but that these very persecutors 'knew it is evident, for when it would " serve their turn to distress me in any *< shape, then my popularity was always *f urged as an argument against me, and ** as such was made use of in the very " best opportunity they had of shewing *' tlieir tender regard for me, I mean " when went I to London. This argu- " ment was then pushed as a reason for " the necessity of having a guard of sol- " diers along with me to London, and ** for putting me into irons, though at " that very time I had the gout in both '* feet, both knees, and in my right " hand, unable to move without the ** assistance of two persons, but of this ** more in its proper place. Had D. f* S n said that he and his partizans " were exceedingly rejoiced, I dare say " he would have been credited for once " in his life, without bringing vouchers ** to prove it. ; -n )r " His being author of this paragraph OF STERNE. 13d " as well as of that of ,the 17th of the " same month, and that on the 7th of " January following ill became him, " considering him in any light or capa- ** city, and even in point of prudence " and policy too." As the person treated with so much roughness was Sterne's Uncle, it may be naturally supposed, that Dr. Burton's invectives would make an unfavourable impression on his relations, and might give rise to the caricature of Dr. Slop. Why the Doctor's Jacobitical principles were not satirized, may be readily ex- plained from Sterne's short Memoirs of himself. He says, that his Uncle was a violent party-man, and that after living together on the most friendly terms, he quarrelled with our author, because he detested party-violence, and refused to write political paragraphs for his Uncle in the York paper. The sanguinary, and boundless resentments of that period were wholly unsuited to tlie delicacy of 140 ILLUSTRATIONS the author's feelings. He has therefore imputed no other pohtical distinction to Dr. Slop, than the very pardonable one arising from being a Catholic. Dr. Burton was discharged, without being brought to trial, after a confine- ment of some weeks, in the house of a messenger, in London. After this tragedy, I must introduce the Doctor in a farce. In the year 1754, he had an affray with one of the aldermen of York, at an entertainment in the Mansion-house, and was turned out of the room with very significant marks of disapprobation. My knowledge of diis affair is entirely derived from the alderman's pamphlet, which is entitled, " An Account of what passed between " Mr. George Thompson, of York, and " Dr. John Burton of that City, Physi- " cian and Man-Midwife, at Mr. Sheriff ** Jubbs' Entertainment, and the Con- ** sequences thereon." It is dated, 175^. The scuffle was occasioned by Dr, Bur- OF STERNE. 14l ton*s refusal to drink one of the loyal toasts of the day. Whoever creates himself political ene- mies, must expect to see his faults and imperfections displayed in the strongest light. Mr. Thompson, accordingly, en- ters into his antagonist's private history. " Then as to the Doctor's modesty, " there is no passing by one instance of " it, where he tells you (page 14) that " he qualified himself to act, towards " redressing the heavy complaints, which ** there had been of the hardships and " practices of some persons in the com- " mission of the land-tax. What notable " rcdressments this great patriot-personage ** made he does not indeed specify, but *' however he might settle the national " concerns under his administration, or " whether he neglected his private for " the public affairs, there is no saying, " but he himself broke for upwards of *' five thousand pounds, and paid ten "shillings in the pound, so that having 142 ILLUSTRATIONS " nothing left but his wife*s fortune, " which they could not touch, his boast- " ed qualification for acting in the com- " mission, must not have had a very " deep bottom, whether his composition " preceded or followed his taking it up : " nor should I in truth have touched, at " any rate, upon his circumstances, but " to justify my suspicion of his having " had the law-charges of his most ini- " quitous cause, or rather causelessness, " against me, defrayed by the subscrip- " tion of his party, which I hope for " his own sake is true. Nay, I have " the charity to wish him success in the " subscription he has been for some time " soliciting, for his ECCLESIAST^ICAL HlS- " TORY of Yorkshire, in two volumes " in folio, not only as it may be of a " pecuniary importance to himself, but " as the work itself may be an useful " repertorium hcreai'ter, in case of the " coming in of a Roman Catholic power " to resume the Church and Abbey lands OF STERNE. 143 " out of the hands of the present posses- " sors, not forgetting to make them ac- " countable for wastes and dilapidations.'* The particular details of the personal contest would be uninteresting, as no pugilistic skill was displayed on either side. Mr. Thompson subsequently com- plained that his loyalty was ill-rewarded, and that, ..- ^ - .ij -..i ;. ^ .. _| . ;,:i f,ii f!f ill :-':xl ' uii: I :r^r; j '/ . ** His thankless country left him to its laws." There is a passage in a prose essay, by Mr. Hall Stevenson, which seems to imply that the characters of Uncle Toby, and the Widow Wadman, had real prototypes : it is contained in the " Sentimental Dialogue between Two Souls," which may be seen in the last edition of Mr. H. Stevenson's works. I beg to be excused from quoting the anecdote, to which I refer. If my conjecture be just, the public will not have much reason to regret their igno- rance of the parties. It is impossible to quit this subject. 144. ILLUSTRATIONS without remarking, once more,* wliat a wagte of talents is occasioned by tem- porary satire. We know hardly any tiling of Sterne's objects ; those of Rabe- lais are merely matters of conjecture; the authors satirized by Boileau are only known by his censures ; and the heroes of the Duuciad arc indebted to Pope for their preservation. Flecknoe's poems, which I have had in my hands, would not now obtain a single reader, but for Dryden's immortal satire. Avellaneda's second part of Don Quixote has been embalmed by the criticisms of Cervantes. Why will men of genius condescend to record their resentment against block- heads I Why cannot they say to an opponent, Ignotus pereas, miser, neCesse e(st?<(ip:> * See Dr. Warto8*s notes K)n the J)uncjad. |- III a cojvy of ver.se5, addressetl to Dr. Burton, ou jccasion of his pamphlet against Dr- Sterne, I find the following lines: -' ^; Whether in physic thou onco rnofeeugaae, ^ . AiiU with new ilicfts ituff thv Non-natural pag<>. Or on new subjects me brevi naso Hebrcei promptum ad iram vel iracundum interpret antur.^ As the nose furnishes the principal expression of derision in the countenance, several words and phrases in the Greek and Latin languages bear a reference to It, in denoting raillery or contempt. But it is sometimes assumed as the type of judgment and acutencss. Ipse denique Nasus, says Erasmus, in proverbium abiit, pro judicio. Horat. Non quia nullus illis nasus erat.-\ * Hpras Subcisivje, torn, i, p, 25.3. In p. 249, Nasus Do7nini is memtioned as a figure for Anger, t Adagia, p. 348. K 3 150 ILLUSTRATIONS Another phrase is not very refined in its origin ; though it denotes acuteness and even polish : Emunctae narls duros componere versus.* Martial has an epigram v^^hich cannot be translated into English, (though some- what applicable to this book), on account of his adherence to this figure ; Nasutus sis usque licet, sis denique nasus. Quantum nolue^it ferre rogatus Atlas, Et possis ipsum tu deridere Latinutn, Non potes in nugas dicere plura meas. Ipse ego quam dixi ; f And in another place he employs a strong figure, equally intractable in Eng* lish, to denote the early critical abilities of the Roman youth : Et pueri nasum rhinocerotis habent.J In the French and Italian languages^ such allusions are very common. I take * II or at. + Kpigrammat. lib, xiii. epigr. S}. X Lib, i. epigr. 4- OF STERNE. 151 the following remarks from the Nasea o Aretine, a writer whom Burton has quoted lavishly (from the Latin transla- tion of Barthius) in some of the chapters on Love-Melancholy, where he seems to have unbended himself so completely. The frequent references to this author^ in a book which seems to have beeri perpetually in Sterne's hands, would probably induce him to read /tl^ n->, ginal. . . . The author of the Naseat after magni- fying his correspondent's nose, says, " i somma egli c quel naso, che sendo vera- mente Re de' nasi, v' ha degnamente fatto Re de gli huomini, come voi sete : & tan to maggior Re, quanto egli e mag- gior naso, & piu magnifico, & piu onni- potente de gli altri. Laqual cosa pro- cedendo per via di ragione si puo per diversi modi provare : ma primamente le proveremo per 1' autoritd de' Persi, i quali dopo la morte di Giro, (che secondo , si scrive si troyo un bel pezzo di naso) giu- K 4 I5t! ILLUSTRATIONS dicarono che nessuno huomo potesse csser ne bello, ne degno di regnaie, che non si trovasse cosi nasuto, come fu egli. Nel libro de Re trovo una postilla del Mazza- gattone, con un tratto del Zucca, che Nabuccodenasor hebbe quel Regno, & quel nome, perche hebbe gran bocca, & gran naso. Sopra che si fonda V oppe-* niorie d* un mio compagno, quale ^, che Carlo v. sia hoggi si grande Impera- dore, perche si trova si gran bocca : &c che Francesco Re di Francia sia si gran Re, perche ha si gran naso : & che si non fosse, che '1 naso del Re contrasta con la bocca deli' Imperadore; & la bocca deir Imperadore col naso del Re, ciasc uno d' essi (merce di quella bocca, o di quel naso) sarebbe Signor di tutto il mondo : Dove per il j)ari, o poco differ rente contrapeso, di pari o poco dilfe- rentimente contendono della somma dell' Impcrio, Et diccmi che 'I Re non per altro fu prigione sotto Pavla, se non perche in quel tempo la Macsta del suo OF STERNE. 155 naso, si trovava impaniata di cert'i pias- trelli,* per un certo male del suo paese, ct die la bocca dell' Imperadpre era sana, et senza impedimento. Nel pas- sagio poi di sua Maesta Ces. in Provenza, cbe '1 naso del Re era sano, et la bocca deir Imperadore per carestia di vetto- vagUa si trovo mal pasciuta, ognun sa come la bisogna andasse. Mapcr tornare al naso, io voglio dire alia Maesta V. un gran segreto, cbe tutti i pedanti lo cer- cano, et non 1' banno ancor trovato ; cbe Ovidio Nasone non fu per altro confinato, se non percbe Augusto dub- bito cbe quel suo gran naso non li togli- esse 1* Imperio ; et mandollo in esiglio tra quelle nevi et quel gbiacci della Moscovia^ percbe li si seccasse il naso di freddo. L' Aquila percbe credete. voi cbe sia Regina dc gli uccegli, se non percbe si truova quel naso cosi grifagno? V Elefante percbe e egb piu ingenioso * Piccioli emplastri' 154 ILLUSTRATIONS de gli altrl anrmali^ se non perche ha quel grugno cosi lungo ? II Rinocerote per qual cagione e tanlo temuto da vitiosi se non |)ercbe 1' ha cosi duro ? In somma un naso straordinario porta sempre scco straordinaria maggioranza: et non senza ragione. Percio chc io ho trovato> che '1 naso e la sede de}la Maesti & dell' bonore dell' huomo : et per conseguenza chi magglor 1' ha, piu honorato debbe essere. Donde si dice, Tu mi dai del naso, id est, tu metoccbi nell* bonore."* " In a word, it is such, that being truly the king of noses, it has justly ren- dered you the king of men ; and so much a greater king, as it is the greatest, the most magnificent, and most powerlul of noses, which may be proved in twd different ways ; but particularly by the authority of the Persians, who after the death of Cyrus (a prince, according to authors, excellently provided with a nose) * Page 532, 3, 4, I quote from the scarce Elaevir fdition. OF tSTERNE. 155 e&tecmcd no man beautiful, nor worthy to reign, unless he had a nose of like size. In the book of Kings is a note by Mazzagattone,* with a jest by Zucca,-f- that Nabuccodenasor had his kingdom and his name from his great mouth and his large nose. Upon which a friend of mine has founded an opinion, that Charles V. is at present so great an emperor, because he has so large a mouth ; and that Francis king of France is so great a king, because he has so large a nose ; and that if it liad not happened that the king's nose counter- acted the emperor's mouth, and the emperor's mouth the king's nose, one of them (by virtue of the mouth or the nose), would have been master of the whole world : whence it follows, that balancing each other, they contend for the sove- reignty with nearly equal fortune. And he tells me, that the king was taken * Scarecrow. t Gourd ; he had *' a gourd for his head," I sup- pose. 156 ILLUSTRATIONS prisoner at Pavia, only because at that time the majesty of his nose was de- graded, by some outward appHcations on account of the country-disease, while the emjx^ror's mouth was healthy and unimpaired. In the emperor's inva- sion of Provence, the king's nose being healed, and the emperor's mouth being injured by want of provi- sions, every one knows how the affair terminated. But to return to noses in general, 1 will tell your majesty a great secret, which all the pedants have tried without success to discover : that Ovid (Naso), was banished for no other reason, than that Augustus feared that his great nose might carry off the empire from him : and he sent Ovid into exile among the snows and ice of Russia, that his nose might be shrivelled with cold. Why, think you, is the eagle the queen of birds, but because of her prominent beak ? Why is the elepant the wisest of animals, but because he has so long a OF STERNE. 157 trunk ? Why is the rhinoceros so much dreaded by the vitious,* but because his horn is so hard ? In fine, an extraordi- nary nose always carries with it extra- ordinary greatness ; and not without rea- son. For I have found that the nose is the seat of majesty and honour in man ; and consequently whoever has it largest ought to be most honoured." The next passages relate to Italian proverbs taken from this figure, which hardly admit translation, or to a view of the subject from which I totally abstain. An account follows of the expression of the passions depending on the nose, and of the different kinds of noses: every thing that might have been ex- pected from Sterne's Slawkenbergius, the idea of which was perhaps inspired by this very treatise. " Beato voi, says the author in another place,-)- che vi portate * In translating an author full of extravagant and, far-fetched conceits, of the 1 6th century the meaning sometimes unavoidably escapes us, t Page 54Q. 156 ILLUSTRATIONS in faccia la meraviglia, & la consolatlone di chiunqufi vi mira. Ognuno strabilia che lo vede : ognuno stupisce clie lo sente : a tutti da riso ; a tutti desiderio. Tutti i Poeti ne cantano: tutti i pi-osatori nescri- vono ; tutti colore che hanno favella ne laglo nano : Qui dopo che voi sete partito s' e fatto piu iVacasso di questo vostro naso, che dclia gita del Papa a Nizz^, et del passagio che prepara il gfan Turco ; tanto che mi pa,r diven- tato la tromba della tama, che da ognuno c sonata, et da ognuno ^ sentita." I confess that all tliese circumstances, of the ** wonder which he carries in his face; of the astonishment and interest with which every one regards him ; of the employment which his appearance furnishes to all the writers and talkers ; of the noise which is occasioned by his wonderful nose after his departure, which overpowers the reports of the residence of the Pope at Nice, or the invasion meditated by the gr^nd Turk ; 3iid of its resemblance to the trumpet of fame. Off STERNB. ^159 whicli is sounded and felt by every one; these, widi many other alUisions and in- cidents iji this author, remmd mc of the stranger at the gates of Strasburgb, in Slawkenbergius'y taie. Sterne has sliewed, on many occasions, how well he could improve upon slight hints. In the third volume of Bouchet, the subject of noses is briefly men- tioned ; the passage follows : Ceste cha- leur fait aussi, adjousta^il encores^ que les Mores sont fort cam us, et diriez qu' on ieur a coupe le nez sur le billot! oela procedant de la grandc chaleur, qui ne permet pas que les os et les cartilages croissent beaucoup, comme vcnans d* une matiere inutile et vacante : les petits enfans le confirment bien, lesqucls estans chauds, sont camus, ayans en Ieur jeu- nesse le nez fort court. Et si faut noter que les Mores, et tons ceux qui sont camus, sont coleres : & qu' au contraire, les grands nez sont plus patiens & pru- dents, et qu' en la Bible quand on dit 160 ILLUSTRATIONS que quelqu* un k grand nez, les inter- prelestournent patient: cequi demonstie qu* en la physionomie y h quelque divi- nation de complexion.* , . , There is a writer who deserved a liigher place in Mr. Shandy's library, than any of those whom Sterne has ventured to mention; and he was the more entitled to notice, because his fame has been unjustly and unaccountably eclipsed. I allude to Gaspar Tagliacozzi, or, according to the pedantic fashion of the times, Taliacotius, a professor at Bologna, who outstripped his contempo- raries too far, to gain the honour and the confidence due to his discoveries. He had indeed the ipisfortune of being too learned for his time, in D' Alembert's phrase ; frop instruit pour son siecle. The iirst part of his book De Curtorum Chi- rurgia, however, was sufficiently accom- modated to the prevailing taste. It con- tains several chapters on the dignity of * Bouclu't, tom. iii. p. 110, li? Siijh '^'OF STERNE. 161 the face and its different features ; the fifth and sixth chapters are bestowed upon the nose, and contain philosophy enough to have satiated Mr. Shandy himself. There is a very curious speculation in. the chapter on the Dignity of the Face, medically considered, which the learned reader will not be displeased to see, and which, I hope, he will keep to himself. '* Agam saltern id, ut perspecto situ membrorum genitalium, quanta ratio ha- bita fuerit excellentiae faciei atque nobi- litatis, quodque membra haec justissimo architecti consilio, non exiguo interstitio inter sedirempta sint, exactecognoscamus. Nam cum cerebri sit propago qusedam facies, ad quam sensuum omnium organa deflectant, quo in loco animoe virtus divinas suas vires exerat, quid inconveni- entius fuisset, & protoplasta indignius, quam membra ilia pecuina et abjecta, cum partibus adeo nobilibus et divinis confundere ? Hoc enim dominum esset cum mancipio eodem loco ponere. Nam- VOL. I. L 165 ILLUSTRATIONS que muiiia sensuum turbaret talis consti- tutio, mentis aciem obtundeiet, ^ rati- onis iraperium everteret. Innata enim homiuibus cupiditas, Jevi etiam de causa instigata, ac indomita bestia multoties in rectorem suum insiliret, & habenis ex- cussis, de sede sua earn dejiceret. Non dicam quantum obfuturuni sit decori & venustati. quantaque loci fuerit iniquitas, & laboris dispendium, si omnino membra ilia eo locari debuissent. Quare ea procul hinc abrepta, natura sapiens discrevit, & t'aciem alta in sede & conspicua col- locari, membra vero genitalia, instar vile pccus in stabula, locum vilem, &c depresr sum dctrudi jussit."* lu the fii'th chapter, which treats of the dignity of noses, we meet with a laboured description of tlie deformity resulting from the mutilation of this * It is extrcir?>ely curious, that the fi^mous Madtle de Bourignon has actually supposed the noses of the first Pair, before their transgression, to have been con- stituted in the manner which Tajiasptius has so clo> quently described. See Bayle. OF STERNE. IW important feature. When the nose is cut off, we are told, * that the gulphs and recesses of the inward parts are disclosed; vast vacuities open, and caverns dark as the cave of Trophonius ; to the dismay and terfor of tlie beholders.* .," There is besides," says Taliacotius, " something august and regal in the nose, either because it is the sign of corporeal beauty and mental perfection, or because it denotes some peculiar aptness and wis- dom in governing. So the Persians ad- mire an aquiline nose in their king : so in the Old Testament, those who had too small, or too large, or a distorted nose, were excluded from the priesthood, and the sacrifices. Such is the dignity attributed to the nose, that those who are deprived of it are not admitted to the functions of government : " which he * Etenim narium apice abscisso, panduntur sinus & partmm internarum recessus, vasti patent hiatus, & cavernee, instar antri Trophonii obscurae ; horrendum certe & abominandum aspicientibus spectaculum. Lib. i. chap' a. L2 l<5t ILLUSTRATIONS confirms by historical examples, from the dismal narratives of Joseph us. ** The nte,' therefore, is of such estimation,** he concludes, " that upon the beauty and configuration thereof depend the highest ecclesiastical dignities, the noblest governments, and the most extensive kingdoms.* Besides, the nose chiefly distinguishes one individual from ano- ther V'^vherefore iEneas could hardly re- cognize Deiphobus, when he encounter- ed him in the shades without his nose,*' which he had lost, like many of Talia- cotius's friends, by means of his Helen as Cassandra complains in Senecii't'^'^ ^'^^ ;i" ' j^. ^incertos ge^ ^j|j ^^j^ De'i phobe vultus, conjugis munus novaeL , . He then shews, thjlt the- threi! /c^ cutting ofl:' the noses and ears of sinners . *> Nasuftiergo tantx rest estimationis, ut ex ejus (icore, ornatuque, sumnia Sacerdotia, amplissima im- peria, et regiia latissima peodece videanturi.ua.'i ic ,^. j j i^ V Ibid. OF STERNE. J 65 is used in scripture, to denote the utmost degree of desolation and infamy, and he touches sliglitly on the doctrine of the Pythagoreans respecting the nose ; that nature has expressed in the formation of this feature, the Monade and the Dyade, by connecting the two nostrils by a com- mon bridge; an observation from which those pompous triflers draw fantastical ideas of the power of certain numbers. We are next told, that the Egyptians used the nose as a hieroglyphic to signify a wise man ; after which follow the Latin phrases, which depend on this figure. The chapter is concluded by the physi- ognomonic doctrine of the nose, on which Mr. Lavater has left nothing unsaid. The obscurity under which Taliacotius's brilliant discoveries on the union of living parts have remained, is not more remark- able than its cause : it was occasioned by the jest of a Dutchman. The con- temptible story which Butler has versi- L 3 166 ILLUSTRATIONS fied, in his well known lines, was forged by Van Helmont, and obtained such currency through Europe, that even the testimony of Ambrose Pare in favour of Taliacotius was disregarded.* The real process employed by this great man, in supplying deficient or mutilated parts, consisted in taking the additional substance from the patient's own arm. That his attempts were suc- cessful, we have ample testimony in the writings of Par6 and other surgeons, though his method seems not to have been adopted by any of them. I shall try to give the reader a general idea of this curious operation, with the view of rescuing the memory of a man of genius from the most galling of evils, the suc- cessful misrepresentations of stupid ma- lignity. * So completely unfounded is Van Helmont's story, that Taliacotius (lib. i. chap, xviii.) has considered the question formally, whether the supplementary part ought to be taken from the patient himself, or from another person, and has decided for the former. OF STERNE. 1<57 Wlien the mutilation of the nose was to be repaired, the artist fixed on a suffi- cient portion of skin on the inside of the arm, about half way between the shoul- der and the elbow. This was pinched up with a pair of blunt forceps, and separated on three sides from the other integuments, and from the muscles be- neath, so as to form an oblong slip, re- maining connected at one end to the rest of the skin, which Taliacotius calls the root of the slip. The edges of the jiasal stump were afterwards pared with a scalpel, and the edge of the new slip was attached to them by sutures ;* the arm being bound up to the face and head, by a curious apparatus, which my author has elaborately described. The parts were now suft'ered to unite. In the course of a fortnight the adhesion * This part of the operation was delayed, till the first inflammatory symptoms in the arm, occasioned by the excision of the slip, had subsided. If the operation should ever be revived, this cruel and unnecessary in- terniption would certainly be avoided. L4 168 ILLUSTRATIONS became so strong, that the engmfted part would bear the experiment of being pulled and flipped. " Licebit tunc ex- periri rem, et traducem jam infixum non leviter concutere, qui cum validiori nexu cum naribus conjunctus sit, omnem motus tunc violentiam egregie sustinet.."* It was then time to separate the new part from its attachment to the arm, which was performed by dividing the root of the slip. Nothing then remained but to cut the point of the nose into proper form, for which Taliacotius has giveii a mathematical rule, and to keep the artificial nostrils open, by means of tents, till the cure was completed. If we attentively consider this method of retrieving a deplorable misfortune, which was a frequent consequence of the gallantries of that time, it must be allowed that the artist who invented, and who singly practised it, possessed un- common professional merit. But when * Taliacot. lib- ii. cap. xiii. OF STERNE. 1(J9 we reflect, that the display of facts, pre- cisely similar, respecting the power of union in living parts, has conferred high celebrity on one of the most eminent physiologists of our own times, our re- spect for the author of the sixteenth cen- tury advances to admiration.* I have too high an opinion of the genius of the late Mr. HUNTER, to suppose that he was indebted to Taliacotius for his obser- vations on tliis subject ; I believe they were really discoveries to him ; but there can be no doubt that he was anticipated by the Italian author. It is a disagree- able proof of the neglect of medical literature, that facts, so important to the theory and practice of the art, were so long obscured by silly and unpardonable prejudice. y.oj ' 1>7 ,1;>^ l^lDr. Gartnann has written a chapter on the sympathy of artificial noses,:|: in his . .^\ Nonaiaro praeterea contingit, ut,in ^yis naribus pili expullulent alqpe in earn longitudinera eluxurient, tiV novaculam aliquando adhiberi necesse est. Idenr, Ibid. f Idem, Ibid. '' '^'^ + De Nasi insitltii sympathi*./"'-*'^*'"'*'^^^^^ 1 174 ILLUSTRATIONS curious book De MiracuUs Morhigrum ; he has stated, in l)?is, the famous inst^^lce of Cyrus's nose very strongly. " Nasum aduncuiii prominentcmque iestimabant PersiB. quod Cyru& TALI NASO ARMATU3 regnuvn capesserk."^ He denies Talia- cotius's claim to the invention of this operati^^ ^pd mentions ft ^lemarkable pa^sagi^ \i\ tlie letters of an earlier writer, anniouncing tl)/e discovery of l?is friend, wjio lif^^ }pst his iijQs, ad iijtbrniiijg hii^ t^;he. ip^ynPW t>!9' fitted w^itji.^as lai^ge ^(.|iqs^ 43 he chposeii^^o f^iJ^e- ljp i^ta Cal^inus in Uteris ad Orpian^m mutir ium : J^mnea Siculiis, ingenio vir cgr^gio, c|idiciina|I^4H^prere, quas vpl de brachjg reficit, vel de s.Qrvi8- mufcuatM? iiiiipingit, J^jec wiii vidi dof^x^jti ad" te. sqyifcicnB, ujhil esiistim^iw ear igs m^: pQ69^ ... f^tipd- six veneris, scito, te domum cum grandi quamvis nasp reditu rum esse.-f- Whether tlie practice was tflOWi> in Bologna before .'-(ft' * Page 82. I ^.:.^, ^ t De Miraculis D^ortuoram,: p; ^-f, .:/ .,(1 '. Q STERNE. 170r Taliacotius, we h^ve no accurate means of determining : we certainly liave na earlier treatise on it than his. Licetus says, that he often saw Taliacotius ope- rate, during his residence at Bologna as a student. If other surgeons had ven- tured on the same, attempt, La citta de ia Salciccia fina* '>V/;ri I would have been as much celebrated for its fabrication of noses, as for its sausages. Fienus, a Lovain-Professor, and authof of a well known book on the Power of the Imagination, has given a very satis- factory account of the operation for the restitution of the nose, in his surgical tracts. He says, that he had frequently seen Taliacotius perform it, and that he had examined many noses which the artist had engrafted ; among other dis- advantages, he found that the artificial nose was apt to be t<)0 pliable, and to hang down like a turkey's. Fienus * Tassoni, 17(5 ILLUSTRATIONS thought it necessary that the new nose should be kept in a case, during at least two years. ^^ ^*^' IF the reader wishes to consult any other authorities, concerning the reality of this operation, he will find a long list in that chapter of Dr. Garmann to which I have already referred. .. It is said that a similar practice is known in Asia (where the point of the nose is an object of so much importance), and that the new part is supplied from the patient's own forehead. But the chief merit of the discovery was undoubtedly due to Taliacotius, wha requires, according to the ceremonies of bis time, a Qoippjiment at parting. , ' : * ' -f ' 'f ."'''' ' f Brave rfiW, wfiic1i5ursti like Biomede, engage ' To check the Paphiaii Q,ueen*3 most deadly rage. The tritler\s wonder, and the witling's jest. Base tools of envy, long thy fame supprest ; Tho* pagan Jove display'd no art so high, 1^ Pelop's shoulder, or the Samian's thigh j Tho' even the boast of Alchemy less bold. To change imperfect ore to perfect gold : Thy nobler thoughts approach'd creative skill. Life, sense, and motion waiting on thy will. OF STERNE. 177 The French writers, especially those of the sixteenth century, used the figures dei'ived from the nose very liberally. Eire camiis, signifies with them to appear surprised and abashed. Vigneul-Marville mentions a curious anecdote on this sub- ject, which accords very closely with a passage in Sterne. " Les nes camus deplaisent, et sont de mauvaise augure. Le Conn^table Anne de Montmorency 6toit camus ; et on r appelloit k la cour, le camus de Mont- morency. Le Due de Guise, fils de celui qui fut tu^ k Blois, 6toit aussi camus ; et j' ai connu un gentilhomme qui ayant une v6n6ration singuli6re pour ces deux maisons de Guise et de Mont- morency, ne se pouvoit consoler de ce qu* il s*y etoit trouve deux camus, comme si ce defaut en diminuoit le lustre."* " He, (Mr. Shandy) w^ould often de- clare, in speaking bis thoughts upon the * Tom. i. p. UO, Vol. I. M 178 ILLUSTRATIONS subject, that he did not conceive how the greatest family in England could stand it out against an uninterrupted succession of six or seven short noses."* This is a curious coincidence ; I pretend to call it no more. But it must , be added, that Marville's Miscellanies appear to have been much read, about the time when Sterne wrote. I am inclined to doubt whether Sterne had read this author, because I find much philosophy concerning noses in his second volume, which might have been accommodated to Tristram. He observes, that every face, however ugly it may appear, possesses such a degree of symmetry, that the alteration of any feature would reader it more deformed. " { For instance, if it were attempted to * Tris. Shandy, vol. Hi. chap, xxxiii. f Par exemple, si 1' on pretendoit alonger le nez d'un camus, je dis qu'on ne t'croit rien qui vaille ; par- ceque ce nez etant alonge, it ne feroit plus simetrie avec les autres parties du visage, qui etant d'une cer- taine grendeur, et aiant de certaines elevations, ou de OF STERNE. nO lengthen the nose of a flat-nosed man, I should expect no improvement of his appearance ; because this nose being lengthened, would no longer correspond with the other parts of the face, whieh being of a given size, and having their igiven elevations and depressions, require certains enfoncemens, demandent que le nez leur soit proportionne. Ainsi selon des certaines regies tres parfiiifes en ellesm^mes, un camus doit etre camus ; et selon ces regies c'est un visage regulier qui deviendroit un monstre si on lui faisoit le nez aquilin. Je dis bien plus, qu '1 est quelquefois aussi necessaire qu*un homme n' ait point de nez, qu' il est necessaire dans I'ordre TosCan, par exemple, que le chapiteau de sa colon n' ait point de volute- C est un bel ornement que la Volute dans I' ordre lonique ou dans le Corinthien, mais ce seroit un monstre et un irregularite duns 1' ordre Toscan. Un petit nez, des petits yeux, une grande bouche qui nous choquent d' ordinaire, appartiennent A un ordre de beaute, qui peut bien n' etre pas de notre goust ; mais que nou:5 ne devons pas condamner, parce qu' en efFet c' est un ordre qui a ses regies, qu' il ne nous appartient pas de contredire. ******** Que fes Fran9ois meprisent les nez camus et les ptits yeux, et que les Chinois les estiment, ces sont des bizarreries et des extravagances de 1' esprit humain, 8tc. Vigneul-Marville Melanges 1' Histoire et de Litte- Tature, torn, ii p. 164, 165. M 2 180 ILLUSTRATIONS a nose proportioned to them. Thus, according to certain rules, complete in themselves, a flat-nosed man ought to be flat-nosed, and, according to those rules, he has a regular face, which would become monstrous, if an aquiline nose were clapped upon it. I go farther, and I advance, that it is sometimes as neces- sary that a man should be without nose, as that in the Tuscan order, the capital of the column should have no volute. The volute is a beautiful ornament in the Ionic or Corinthian order, but in the Tuscan it would be a monster, and an irregularity. A short nose, small eyes, and a wide mouth, which commonly disgust us, belong to an order of beauty, which we may not admire, but which we ought not to condemn, because in effect it is aq order which has its rules, that we have no business to contradict. " Let the French despise flat noses and little eyes, and the Chinese esteem them; fjiesc are the caprices and extrayaganci^ OF STERNl^. Hi of the imagination. But upon our prin- ciples, it appears, that there may be as many different ordei-s of beauty as of architecture." This mode of reasoning would have been very useful to Uncle Toby. He might have proved, that there ought to be flat noses as well as flat bastions. We meet with this peculiar phrase- ology again, in a passage in the Memoirs of La Porte, In mentioning a conversa- tion with Anne of Austria respecting the views which he suspected Maderrioiselle de Montpensier to entertain of a marriage with Louis XIV. he says, " Je dis tout cela a la Reine, qui se mocqua de moi, me disant ; ce n' est pour son nez, quoi- qu* il soit bien grand."* Sterne's curious dilemma, by which a very large nose must fall off" from the man, or the man must fall off from his nose, was anticipated by Tabarin, in * Memoirs de la Porte, p. 275. M 3 18t ILLUSTRATiajfS whose dialogues more is said on tlic subject of noses than I cai'e to repeat. "O qu' il ie feroit beau voir siHr la^ Montagne de Montmartre, avec im n^i^ de dix lie ires de long car on y void de fort loing. 11 lui faudroit des i^urqhegf pour soustenir son nez." * ; The French have lampooned long noses almost as much as the Greeks. Granger, in the Pedant Jouc, is said to have a nose which always made its appearance a quarter of an hour before its owner: " cet autentique nez arrive partout un quart d' heure devant son maitre." And even D'Alemhert, who united more good sense and good taste in his critical works than any odier French writer, has pub- lished some curious details by d'Olivet concerning the Hose of the Abb6 Genest, which was the admiration of the coiu-tiere, and the subject of royal wit. ** While tJie Abb6 Genest was ajt Rome, ^ Qtie^llons TabarWiques. OF STERNE. US he often dined with Cardinal d'Estr^es, who was fond of poets, and who had himself written well in his youth. One day, when his Eminence had a great deal of company, there was a person at table, who, having a very large nose, gave occasion to a man of humour,* one of the guests, to vent a number of witticisms, good or bad, on this mon- strous nose, of which he pretended to be afraid. The Abb6 Genest arrived, who merely looked in, and attempted to steal off, that he might not disturb the party : but the Cardinal recalled him, and de- sired him to take his seat. Then the bel hiimorc having considered this second apparition of a great nose, affected a greater degree of terror, and exclaimed to the Cardinal ; Eminentissimo, per un, si puo soffrire, ma per duo no;-f and * Un bel humore, f May it please your eminence, I could bear one, t)ut it is impossible to endure two. M 4 IM ILLUSTRATIONS throwing down his napkin, he disap- peared with all speed.*'* *l gv> We read, also, of Despointis, a Pari- sian counsellor, whose nose was so im- moderately long, that it attracted the notice of passengers in the street, who would turn and gaze at k, to the hazard of their lives. The shadow of this nose happened one day to all on a very little counsellor, named Coqudey, and eclipsed him so totally, that the judge could not perceive him when it was his turn to plead. Coqueley remonstrated, like Ra- gotin, but with as little effect; Despointis would not yield his place. The litde hero, exasperated beyond all patience* seized the point of his antagonist's nose, and turning it aside, according to the laws of the lever, said, you may stay where you are, but I am determined that your nose shall make room for me."f * Histoire des Membres de TAcadenMe Fran9oise, tom* iii. p. 454. t L' Heureux Chanoine. Paris, *1707, OF STERNE. 185 I have La Rinomachie or the Battle of Noses, a French poem, as long as Brus- cambille's Prologue, but it contains no- thing worthy of attention. In the beginning of the last century'', a small treatise, entitled Le Nez, was published at Cologne. The dedication is dated, 1717. I much doubt whether Sterne ever saw this book. It is a- bur- lesque essay, merely intended to shew the author's reading aed wit. He has not omitted the famous repartee of Guy Patin, which deserves a place here. " Mr. Patin '* plaida un jour au Parlement de Paris, " pour la faculte de medicine, contre " Mr. Renaudot, Docteur de Montpel- " lier, qui pretendoit pratiquer a Paris " comme s'il cut et6 aggreg^ au corps ** des Medecins de cette Capitale. Mr. " Patin eut toute Tavantage, mais il con- " sola sa partie en sortant de T Audience : " Monsieur, lui dit-il, vous avez gagn6 " en perdant : comment, done repondit " Mr. Renaudot ? C'est, repliqua Mr. " Patin, que vous eti^z caimus quand 186 ILLUSTRATIONS ** vous etes entre an Palais, et que Vous * en sortez ayec im pied de Nez." .l^ There is little , novelty in this jeii d* esprit, and the concluding chapter is written in a very bad taste.* Great attention vi^as paid to the form of the nose among the Roman Catholic clergy ; some of the disqualifications for priest's orders were, little noses, because they implied ignorance ; great noses, because the owner was supposed to be puffed up with pride (as he well might, according to the doctrines of which I have given a view) and wry-noses, be* cause they implied a perversencss of understanding.-^ The passage quoted above from Vig- neul-Marville coincides with the opinions of Mr. Lavater, who has shewed himself a zealous champion for the consequence * Eiititlcd, SeiUimens sur les ecarts des quelcjuet Autcurs, qui sc sont oubUc^jiesqiia vouloir ctre / Pane" gyristes du visage mns yeux et sons Nez, } Man of Sin, p. 76". ^OF STERNE. 1S7 of the iiQsc, and for homogeneity of fea- tures. This very ingenious, hut too fanciful writer, has formed an indication of genius which I believe is entirely his own, from the degree of the returning angle which is formed by the junction of the nose with the upper lip. I doubt the justness of such arbitrary marke. Mr. Lavater has been puzzled, I ob- serve, to explain the expression of anxiety in Locke's portrait. It was certainly independent of that great man's character. HGi was subject to fits of asthma, and contracted the appearance of distressful struggles from his sufferings in that dis- ease. A medical observer would pro- nounce Locke to have been asthmatic, from the first view of his busts and prints. I believe, indeed, that almost every dis- ease is characterised by a peculiar ex- pression of the , countenance, and that medical physiognomy might be culti- vated with the highest benefit to man- 188 ILLUSTRATIONS ktrtd.- Unfortunately, to treat of this art with success, an author must not only be ail excellent physician, but a good painter. ' -i' j^-:^:!;. ''-1 shall close mv View offoreisjn writer^ evitic. cap. xxi. qui naso pravo erant pried i ti, judicati fuerc indigni sacerdotio, proindc Venusino poctoe in arte poetica, vita displiceret, si deformem obtinuisset nasum : Noil magis esse vcl'un, quani pra%o vivore naso,** &c.* * Authropographia, p. 213. It is needless to ob- serve, how much Riolan has mistaken the sense of Horace, in tliis passu^'e. OF STERNE. 180 I have observed, that our language is rather deficient in allusions to this organ, especially respecting its varieties, either of length or curtailment. Dunton, in- deed, says, that judge Jeffreys had a nose fit for the great service of destroying schismatics, " for he told the grand jury at Taunton, that he could smell a Pres- byterian forty miles."* And Dr. John- son called sagacity the noseo^ the mind.-|- But a later attempt has been made, to detect this figure in the very rudiments of our language, by the ingenious Dr. Beddoes. " We have," says he, " a remarkable claes of noun-substantives, as they are called by the grammarian ; though according to the metaphysician, they cannot stand by themselves, but are supported by substances. The words I mean are good-ness, great-ness, and their fellows. We have similar words ending in head. Onhed, in old English, is * Panegyric on JefFreySo f Bo?weU's Life of Johnson, vo). iii. p..599. lOO ILLUSTRATIONS unity (one head). It will not, I pre- sume, be denied, that head (caput) is here used in eomposition. Now, in the other case, I suspect, that it is part of the liead which is used ; the nose, ness, nez, French. Both words have been indifferently employed to mark the points of land that are or have been conspicu- ous. Will not this geographical analogy be admitted as a strong confirmation of jny opinion ? If ness be any part of the body, what part else can we imagine it to be, whether we regard sound or situ- ation ? There exists an etymological as truly as a moral sense ; and those who have acquired the former, will feel by how very natural a transition two such eminent members of the body natural, as the head and nose, came to denote abstract qualities." * n What a blaze of light (to use the favourite modern trope) do these obser- vations tlirovv on Mr. Shandy's hypo- * AJontbly Magazine, for July, 1796. OF STERNE. |#l thesis : aixl how triumphantly would he have opened to Uncle Toby the mystery of littleness (little nose), and of meanness (mean nose), of rashness (rash nose), whence we talk of a man's thrusting his nose into matters which do not concern him ; and of many otlier knotty and perplexing terms and phrases ! All this might be done with a tolerable portion of leisure and application ; for I suspect that the etymological sense is very similar to the sense required for playing at whist, driving four in hand, or adjusting with philosophical precision the angle of inci- jdence of a tennis-ball. It is easy to account for the mystery in which Sterne has involved this subject, from the preceding extracts. He had obtained a glimpse of the physiognomic doctrines respecting the nose, but he was ignorant of the general systems which had prevailed concerning the art itself. He does not appear to have been aCf quainted even with the work of Baptist* 192 ILLUSTRATIONS Porta. To have completed Mr. Sliandy*3 character, he ought to have been a pro- fessed physiognomist. Slawkenbergius's treatise would then have taken form and substance, and Sterne would have written one of the most interesting and amusing books that ever appeared. Perhaps no man possessed so many requisites for producing a good work on physiognomy. His observation of cha- racters was sagacious minutely accurate, and unwearied. His feeling was ever just, versatile as life itself, and was con^ veyed to the reader with full effect, because without affectation. But his imagination was ill-regulated, and it had a constant tendency to form combinations on this particular subject, which his taste alone, to say nothing of other motives, should have led him to reject. I shall conclude this chapter, with a curious question relating to the dignity of the ndse. Tlie common point of honour is sufficiently known, Segar, iij OF STERNE. 193 his Honour Militarie^ ST Civil, p. 127, puts this case respecting duels ; '* Two gentlemen being in fight, the one putteth out the eye of his enemie, and hee in requitall of that hurt cutteth off his nose : the question is, who is by those hurts most dishonoured ? It may seem at the first sight, that losse of an eye is greatest, being a member placed above, and that without the sight a man prooveth unfit for all worldly actions : yet for so much as the want of a nose is commonly accomptcd the greatest deformitie, and a punishment due for infamous offences, it may be reasonably inferred, that the losse of that feature, should bring with it most dishonour. Besides that, seeing man is made according to the image of God, we account that the face being made more deformed by the losse of the nose than of one eye, therefore the great- est, honour of the combat is due unto him who taketh the nose of the enemie." End of the First Volumes. ILLUSTRATIONS of STERNE: with OTHER ESSAYS AND VERSES. JJY JOHN FERRIAR, M. D. SECOND EDITION. VOL. II. Peace be with the soul of that charitable and cour-- teous JiuthoTy who, for the common benefit of his fellow-authors, introduced the ingenious way of Miscellaneous Writing ! ^Shaftesbury. LONDON: Printed FOR CADELL AND DAVIES ; BY J. AND J. HADDOCK, HOBSE-ilAUKET, WARRINGTON. 1812. CONTENTS. Page. Chapter VII. Uncle Toby's hobby-horse Amours Stoiy of Sorlisi ----------- 9 Chapter VIII. Mr. Shandy's hypothesis of Christian names Miscellaneous Illustrations - - - 30 Additional Notes ------------- 57 Of certain Varieties of Man -------- 65 Menippean Essay on English Historians - - - 99 On the origin of tlie Modern Art of Fortifi- cation - _ __-. 129 The Puppet-Shew : a Didactic Poem : partly translated from Addison's MachiniE Gesticulantes 1 47 Of Genius 161 Dialogue in the Shades ---------- 1 83 The Bibliomania, an Epistle 199 A Northern Prospect --------217 ILLUSTRATIONS, &c. CHAPTER VII. Uncle Tobys hobby-horse Amours ; Story of Sorlisi. &T Augustine has said very justly, in his Confessions, that the trifling of oduliB is called business : majorum nuga negotia vocantur. The present times are peculi- arly indulgent in this respect. What the last age denominated follies, or hobby-horses, we style collections : Uncle Toby's library would have required no apology, among the hunters of old ballads, and church-wardens* bills of our day. Vol. II. B ' 10 ILLUSTRATIONS I am sensible that a much better defence might be made for him : it would be easy to prove the utility of his studies, and to shew, not only that the fate of empires has sometimes depended on the construction of the retired flank of a bastion, but that without some portion of his knowledge, it is impossible to under- stand completely some of the most in- teresting passages in modern history. But I am aware that this " sweet foun- tain of knowledge," as Sterne names it, is relished by few : it is ** cftviar'* to the generality of readers. They will probably feel more interest in the curious coin- cidence between the story of Widow Wadman, and one which made a great noise in Germany, a little after the mid- dle of the last century. The origin of the lady*s distress was nearly the same, but her conduct was very different from that of Sterne's heroine, and did the high- est honour to her purity. The misadven- ture of the gentleman happened only OF STERNE. 11 thirty-six years before the siege of Namur by King William, where Sterne laid the scene of Uncle Toby's wound. The distresses of this pair, who may be almost termed the Abelard and Heloise of Ger- many (saving that they prosecuted their affections with the strictest virtue, en tout * I am in possession of a very curious account of the siege of Namur, published under the immediate direction of King William lu. in 1695. It is a thin folio, of sixty-one pages, with very beautiful plans, engraved by order of the king. |f the late Lord Orford had seen this work, he would perhaps have given William a place among the Royal authors. Much personal pique entered into the contests between that hero, and Louis XIV. I consider this book as a proof of it. When Louis took Namur, he published a splendid account of the siege, in folio. The work which I am describing was William's retort, and it concludes with a triumphant, though dignified enumeration of the in- creased difficulties, under which the fortress was reco- vered firom the French arms. One of the plans repre- sents the movements of the covering, aud observing armies, and bears for its device, the conceit of lions tearing cocks in pieces, which Sir John Vanbrugh was blamed for adopting, afterwards, at Blenheim. It is difficult to say, whether the inventor or imitator of such' a Rebus had the worse taste. Vanbrugh has shewed that he was capable of much better things. . B 2 12 ILLUSTRATIONS bien et en tout honneur) deserve to be more generally known. Their history has been confined to an obscure book,* and has never yet found its way into our language : I shall therefore venture to make a sketch of it. My readers may perhaps recollect, that Charles x. of Sweden invaded Denmark, in 1659; that after passing the Sound, and taking the castle of Cronenburg, he laid siege to Copenhagen ; where he lost so much time in preparing for a general assault, that the inhabitants, aided by the gallant exertions of die Dutch canno- neers, recovered sufficient spi.iits to re- pulse him ; and that the Swedes, after raising the siege, were attacked and defeated in the Isle of Flihnen, where the remaining part of their army y^s^, obliged to surrender at discretion. In the battle of Flihnen, which cost *. Valentini's Novellte Medico-legales ; under the title of Conjugiuui Eunuchi. An entertaining selectioit. might b inudc from this book. ^ 'OF STERNE. 13 the Swedes upwards of two thousand men, besides several general officers, Bartholomew de Sorlisi, a young noble- man in Charles's service, had the mis- fortune to receive a musket shot of the most cruel nature. He was speedily cured, and was enabled, by the fidelity of his surgeon, to conceal the conse- quences of his wound. Disgusted by this accident with the army, he retired to an estate which he had purchased in Pomerania, where he endeavoured to bury his melancholy in the occupations of a country-life. But in the coui'se of time, the desire of society returned, and having frequent occasions to consult an old nobleman in the neighbourhood, respecting the management of his estate, he insensibly contracted an intimacy with the family, which consisted of his friend's wife and daughter. Dorothea Elizabeth Lichtwer, then a beautiful girl of sixteen, inspired Sorlisi with so ardent a passion, that he attempted every mtN B 3 14 ILLUSTRATIONS thdd to engage her afFections, without allowing himself to consider the injustice of his pretensions. His assiduities were crowned with success; he found his at- tachment repaid, and soon gained such an interest in his mistress's heart, that 1^ demanded her in marriage. As he had become a favourite with the whole fa- iiiily, his -proposals were readily ac- cepted; and if he could have suppressed his secret consciousness, happiness and joy would have appeared to court him.i Unfortunately, Jiis ^^Uiance was dis- agreeable to some of the lady's relations, for three excellent reasons : he was a stranger, a roman catholic, and his fa- mily had been but recently ennobled by Christina. These disqualifications, how- ever, might have been surmounted, especially as Sorlisi, about this time, became known to the Elector of Saxony, who appointed him one of his cham- berlains; but an unexpected piece of treachery put him into the hands oi his enemies. QF STERNE. 1& Sorlisi happened to consult the phy- sician usually employed in the Lichtwer family, and in the confidence which naturally arises between medical men and their patients, had disclosed to him the secret which preyed upon his mind. The officious doctor, forgetting not only his inaugural oath, but the obligations of honour and gratitude, betrayed his patient's confidence to the discontented part of the family, and furnished them with a tale capable of overwhelming the objectof their hatred; especially as about this time, death deprived the lovers of a powerful friend in Mr. Lichtwer. Many men would have shrunk from the ob- loquy which was now let loose against Sorlisi, but he faced the storm gallantly ^ and by exposing his life in some duels at the onset, obtained an exemption from any farther private insults. But the greatest trial of bis firmness was yet behind : it was impossible longer to conceal the cause of all his vexations B 4 le ILLUSTRATIONS from his intended bride, and it became necessary for him to explain his real situation. What a painful confession for Sorlisi, desperately enamoured, and yet touched with the nicest feelings of ho- nour ! What reproaches might he not expect from his mistress, when she dis- covered her affections to be fixed on a shadow ; the fervent expectations of love and youth deceived ; with the prospect of infamy and scorn chnging to her future connection. Could an inexperi- enced girl conquer such alarming ob- stacles to his pursuit? Sorlisi determined to try. How he managed this delicate communication ; with what preparatives and softenings he introduced his melan- choly narrative ; and with what emotion he appealed to the generosity of the fair one, and the compassion of the matron, we are left to imagine. Madame de Lichtwer seemed inclined to give up the match; but the amiable Dorothea de- clared that no misfortune could affect OF STERNE. 17 her attachment, and that she was deter- mined to pass her hfe with SorUsi, under every disadvantage. So exalted a strain of tenderness could not fail to produce acquiescence and respect in the heart of a mother, and the lovers were soon after betrothed, in presence of Madame de Lichtwer and a select party of friends. To complete their marriage became a matter of difficuly, for several theologists had taken the alarm, and murmured so loudly against the proposed scandal, that in consequence of the machinations of their enemies, it was evident that every clergyman would be deterred from sos- lemnizing the nuptials. ^Hjt''-^^>" In this urgency, it was again neces- sary for Sorlisi to undergo the mortifica- tion of repeating his unhappy case. He drew it up in August, 1666, for the opinion of the Ecclesiastical Consistory at Leipsic, using the feigned names of Titius and Lucretia, and giving the best turn to the matter that it would bear. IB ILLUSTRATIONS The Consistory, availing itself of a very- considerate distinction,* gave a favour- able answer; though they acknowledged, that the impossibility of having offspring was the only one out of eighteen reasons, which Luther admitted as a sufficient plea for divorce. All that was now want'mg, was a mandate from the Elector, to authorize the completion of the marriage ; but as he thought proper to consult several theologists on the subject, nothing was decided till the succeeding year, when th*". mandate was granted, which im- posed, at the same time, a discretionary fine upon Sorlisi, by way of quieting the tender consciences of those who opposed the match, for the lionour of the Lu- theran church. The marriage ceremony was therefoj^ * Ut taceamus, in hac persona virili non quidem talem impotentiam et inhabilitatem observari quae gene- fationis actum, ut scholastic! loquuntur, sed generationis Rectum tantum impedit. Conjug. Eunuchi, p. 109' OF STERNE. 19 at length, privately performed at Soridsi's country-house. Here the malice of their enemies might have been expected to rest : but they returned to the attack with fresh fury, resolute to dissolve the union, or to embitter the lives of this persecuted pair. Their chaste attachment w. as to be subjected to the coarse discussions, and abominable constiaictions of dull theologists, animated by party-zeal, and totally incapable of estimating the senti- ments of a respectable woman ; their names were to be coupled with scorn and reproach ; and every effort of Teu- tonic eloquence was to be employed, to persuade them that they ought to find no satisfaction in living togedier. The Supreme Ecclesiastical Consistory, which had hitherto taken no cognizance of the affair, now interposed, and de- manded that the parties should be sepa- rated, to do away the great scandal which their union gave to the godly. Sid ILLUSTRATIONS ''' To take off the force of this formidable interference, Sorlisi had recourse to that method by which the papal bulls have been so often tamed. He offered to enlarge his fine to the extent of building a church, and providing a stipend for a preacher. The Consistory could not in- stantly retract, but this proposal certainly procured time for digesting conciliatory measures. In the mean time, as Ma- dame de Sorlisi protested that she would rather die than forsake her husband, her ghostly directors thought it very edifying to punish her contumacy, by refusing her the sacrament. In a matter of so much consequence to the Protestant religion, as the union of two persons, who preferred each other's happiness to the scruples of their reverences, it was necessary to consult grave examples. That of our Henry vill. seems to have occurred to all parties, it was therefore agreed to collect the opi- nions of the different theological faculties OF STERNE^ M in Germany, of the Lutheran persuasion*; My fair readers must excuse me from detailing the whole distinctions of those learned bodies; for it seems, that to counteract the practice of vice, they had thought it necessary to be completely masters of every vice in speculation. The faculty of Hasse-Giessen professed great concern for the young lady, and apprehended that her husband could not fail to torment her inexpressibly ; quoting the famous passage from St. Basil, " instar bovis cui cornua sunt abscissa, imaginera impetus facere, incredibilem vesaniam spirando." After much other reasoning on her unhappy situation, they con- cluded, that as the matrimonial cere- mony had been profaned by this union, it was necessary to dissolve it immedi- ately. I apprehend, that the communication of the case must have operated in some very sudden and extraordinary manner on the faculty of Strasburg, so much 32 ILLUSTRATIONS agitation and wonder do they express on coining at the knowledge of such fat scandal, which they say, " cannot be tolerated, or approved, or defended." While they wislied to weep tears of blood over the indiscretion of those who had permitted this union (always saving liis Electoral Highness) they could not avoid testifying the greatest horror against the lady's desire to live with her husband : it was, they said, a moral sin. So extreme was the agony and per- turbation of the Strasburg doctors, that I could not help suspecting their consul- tation had been held in the most dan- gerous part of a hot autumn ; but, on referring to the date, I find it took place in November, 1667, Finally, they exclaimed that if the young couple persisted in their refusal to separate, they ought to be banished from a land of piety ; and that severe punishments should be inflicted on Ma- dame de Lichtwer, and those relations OF STERNE. 2i who had encouraged so damnable a connection. The matter worked more gently with the faculty of Jena. They made some allowances for the strength of attachment which the parties displayed, and appeared to experience some faint touches of hu-' manity. They thought, however, that as the only excusable motive which could induce Sorlisi to marry at all must be the desire of society, he would have acted more properly, if he had taken unto himself some quiet old woman to manage his family. And for divers other reasons, which they reckoned very solid, it was their opinion that a separation should take place. The faculty of Ka^nigsberg, proceed-" ing on the principle, volenti nonfii injuria^ thought that great regard should be had to the contentment expressed by the lady, although they were not quite satishe(} with the affair. They put a very subde case, in which they imagined that even 21- ILLUSTRATIONS the Pope must permit an union of this kind : " so. si maritus quidam a barbaris castratur ct abhinc mulieri suae cohabilare et carnaliter, ut ante, se miscere voluerit.". And U|X)n the whole they concluded, that the marriage should be deemed valid, and the parties re-admitted to all religious privileges. I am most pleased with the decision of the faculty of Gripsvvald : they opined, that as the lady had got into the scrape with her eyes open, they might suiTer her to take the consequences without^ danger to their own souls ; and that as she had been encouraged by her mother and several friends in her attachment to Soriisi, it did not quite amount to a mortal transgression. While these huge bodies of divinity thundered forth their decrees, a shoal of small writers skirmished on both sides. The noifec of the contest occupied the attention of all Dresden. One Dr. Bulfeus, on the part of the OF STERNE. 2.5 Sorlisi, proved in form, that there was nothing so very scandalous and alarming as had been represented, in their, mar- riage. He shewed, with great modesty, that excepting the certain prospect of sterility, they had no peculiar cause of dissatisfaction, and that other matches, equally objectionable in that respect, were often concluded between persons of very unequal ages. He also shrewdly observed, that no small scandal had been given, by the singular discussions iii which their reverences had indulged ; discussions which he considered as snares for their consciences, and not highly edifying to the public. An examination of this paper imme- diately appeared, by an anonymous wri- ter, who remarked acutely enough, that the consent of the parties could not ren- der a compact legal, which was illegal in its nature ; he proceeded to shew syllogistically, that the lady had been blinded respecting certain circumstances, VOL. H. O 26 ILLUSTRATION'^ by the rank and tbrtune of Sorlisi, and that this match was certainly brought about by the Devil himseU". ^To strength- en his argument, he adds the curious story quoted by Dr. Warton, in his Essay* on Pope, respecting the complaints of a matron against the barbarities of a certain Itahan duke; bidding, by -way of inference, ** huic sane iixori plus credendum, quam nostras Marias inex- pertae et ncscienti quid distent asra lu- pinis." He adds, that it would be harsh and uncivil to prefer the fancies of a raw girl, to the unanimous sentiments of an host of beai^ed civilians. Another examiner came forth, who might be suspected, from his manner, to have belonged to the faculty of Stras- burg. He declared, that Madame de Sorlisi lived " in statu peccaminoso, scan- daloso et damnabih ;" and gave the most odious turn to the pure attachment she; had manifested. Will it be believed, that this furious theologist wished that OF STERNE. 27 tlic lovers, instead of being married, had been cudgelled out of their mutual affection ? He supported this extrava- gance by the example of Luther, who seems to have been fond of using the argumentum baculinum with his friends. It is well known that he once compelled a disputant to come into^ his opinion, by the dextrous application of a good cudgel ; and the examiner says, he took the same method with his maid-servant, who had been silly enough to fall in love, and whom he thrashed into a severer way of thinking. It would have been easy to hav^e replied, that Ludier shewed a litde more complaisance for the tender passion, when he sanctioned the bigamy of the Elector, his patron ; but the retort would have been ill received at the court of Dresden. This terrible doctor, however, literally called out for clubs ; " ad bacu- lum, ad baculum quo pruritum extin- guite ! " C 2 28 ILLUSTRATIONS A milder adversary, moved by the largeness of the fine which Sorlisi had engaged to pay, doubted whether tlie parties, upon acknowledging the enor- mity of their offence, might not be suffered to live together as brother and sister, a concession which the unfortu- nate jxiir seem to have been at length willing to make. But upon setting aside the consideration of the money, and regarding the scandal and danger likely to accrue to the protestant church, from such an indulgence, he reluctantly de- cided in the negative. After wearying the reader with this tedious detail, he will be glad, for more reasons than one, to learn, that in May, 1668, the Consistory of Leipsic declared that the marriage ought to be tolerated, and the parties to be freed from any farther vexation of prosecution on that account. At the same time, the Elector, to prevent the growth of scandal, ordered that this case should not be considered OF STERNE. 29 as a precedent, and that no future in- dulgence of the same kind should be permitted. C 3 30 ILLUSTRATIONS CHAPTER VIII, Mr. Shandt/*s hypothesis of Christian names Miscellaneous illustrations Con^ elusion. 1 Think it is D*Aubign6 who mentions a fact, wrought up by Sterne into a chapter, that the States of Switzerland proposed the name of Abednego to be given to one of the children of Henry II, of France, Sterne transferred the story, with his usual carelessness, to Francis I. Burton certainly should have added to the happiness of being well-born, that of being well-named ; and this super- stition has been so common among the learned, that I wonder how it escaped him. OF STERNE. 31 In the general theory respectuig Chris- tian names, I am persuaded that Sterne had in view Montaigne's Essay des Noms. " Chaque nation," says Montaigne, " k quelques noms qui se prennent, je ne S9ai comment, en mauvaise part; et a nous, Jean, Guillaume, Benoist." Mr. Shandy has passed a similar condemna- tion on some English names, to which vulgar prejudices are attached. I am surprised that Sterne should have with- held a story which Montaigne has told, in support of this fancy. He mentions a young man, who was reclaimed from a very dissolute course of life, by dis- covering that the name of a prostitute whom he went to visit, was Mary. His reformation was so exemplary, that a chapel was built on the spot where his house had stood, and on the same ground was afterwards erected the church of our lady of Poictiers. " Cette correction," says he, " voyelle et auriculaire, devo- tieuse, tiradroit a I'ame :" it was indeed a palpable hit. C 4f 32 ILLUSTRATIONS '* A gentleman, my neighbour," pro- ceeds the venerable Gascon, " preferring tlie manners of old times to ours, did not forget to boast of the proud and mag- nificent names of the ancient nobility, such as Don Grumedan, Don Quedragan, Don Agcsilan, or to say that on hearing them pronounced, he felt that they must be a different kind of people from Peter, Giles, and Jacob. Another passage contains, I suspect, a stroke of satire against the Huguenots, where he compliments them on their subduing the old names of Charles, Louis, and Francis, and peopling the world with Methusalems, Ezekiels, and Malachis. It is curious enough, that St. Pierre, a late writer, should adopt,* and treat largely of this hypothesis, without re- ferring either to Montaigne or to Sterne. Pasquier wrote a whole chapter, in his Recherches siir la France, on the * In the Etudes de la Nature, torn, iii, OF STERNE. 33 fortune attendant on particular names, allottted to the French monarchs; but MorhoiF, who treats gravely of the fata- lity of Christian Names, goes much far- ther, and asserts, that the evil influence of the original name may be corrected by assuming another. " Notarunt non- nulli infaustorum nominum impositione fortunam hominum labefactari, eorum im- mutatione quoque immiitari.* This v^^ould have been a good quotation for Mr. Shandy, at the Visitation. On one occasion, Sterne has pressed a name into this service to vyhich he had no right. " But who the duce has got laid down here beside her? quoth my father, pointing with his cane to a large tomb as he walked on It is St. Optat, sir, answered the sacristan And pro- perly is St. Optat placed ! said my father : and what is St. Optat's story ? continued he. St. Optat, replied the * Morhoff. Polyhistor. torn. i. p. 11(5, 6. 34 ILLUSTRATIONS sacristan, was a bishop. I thought so, by heaven ! cried my father, interrupt- ing liim St. Optat ! ho\v.should St. Optat fail?"* UnUickily for all this good i^illery, the saint's name was Optatus, which is quite a difterent affair, unless the world should be disposed to admit the sincerity of the 710I0 episcopari. If Sterne had looked into Pasquier, he might have found other promising names, such as St. Opportune, St. Pretextat, and several others ; Machiavel too informs ns, that the first pope who altered his name was Ospurcus ; he changed it to Sergius, from his dislike of the former ; but indeed all these curiosities are, as Diogenes said on another subject, (jkeya?^ Savfjiara (MspoTiy great marvcls for fools. In the present state of knowledge, it would be unpardonable to omit a remark, with which an author like Sterne would make himself very merry. It relates to t Tristram Shandy, voK viii. chap. 27. OF STERNE. 35 the passage, in which Mr. Shandy treats the name of TRISTRAM with such indig- nity, and demands of his supposed adver- sary, ** Whether he had ever remem- bered, whether he had ever read, or whether he had ever heard tell of a man, called Tristram, performing any thing great or worth recording? No, he would say, ^TRISTRAM ! The thing is impossible ! " A student of the fashion- able black'letter erudition would have triumphed, in proclaiming the redoubted Sir Tristram, Knight of the Round-table, and one of the most famous Knights- errant upon record. Sterne might have replied : Non scribit, cujus Carmina nemo legit ; * and indeed his pleasant hero has no resemblance to the preux chevalier, I have a few observations to add, which are quite unconnected with each other. Sterne truly resembled Shake* * Martial, lib. ii. 3 ILLUSTRATIONS speare's Biron, in the extent of his depre- dations from other writers, for the supply of Tristram : His eye begot occasion for his wit : For ev'ry object that the one did catch. The other turn'd to a mirth- moving jest. Burton furnished the grand magazine, but many other books, which fell inci- dentally into his hands, were laid under contribution. I am sorry to deprive Sterne of the following pretty figure, but justice must be done to every one. -.i^ " In short, my father advanced 60 very slowly with his work, and I began to live and get forward at such a rate, that if an event had not happened &c. I verily believe I had put by my father, and left him drawing a sun-dial, for no better purpose than to be buried under ground.*** * Tris. Shandy, vol. v. chap. 16. OF STERNE. 37- Donne concludes his poem entitled The Will, with this very thought : And all your graces no more use shall have Than a sun-dial in a grave. I must also notice a remarkable pla- giarism, in the character of Yorick, vol. i. chapter xii. " When, to gratify " a private appetite, it is once resolved " upon, that an innocent and an help- " less creature shall be sacrificed, 'tis an " easy matter to pick up sticks enow " from any thicket where it has strayed, " to make a fire to offer it up with." This is taken, almost verbatim, from the Bacon I AN A. I have said that Sterne took the hint of his marbled pages either from Swift, or the author of Gabriel John, quisquis fuit ilk. There is no great merit in his mourning pages for Yorick, which are little superior, in point of invention, to the black borders of a hawker's elegy, yet even here ai:i original genius hast anticipated him. 58 ILLUSTRATIONS Every one knows the black pages in Tristram Shandy ; that of prior date is to be found in Dr. Fludd's Utrius(]ue cosini Historia,* and is emblematic of the chaos. Fludd was a man of extensive erudition, and considerable observation, but his fancy, naturally vigorous, was fermented and depraved, by astrological and cabbalistic researches. It will afi'ord a proof of his strange fancies, and at the same time do away all suspicion of Sterne in this instance, to quote the ludicrous coincidence mentioned by Morhoff, be- tween himself and this author. " Cogi- tandi modum in nobis ct speculationis illas rationum, mirific<^ quodam in loco, videlicet in libro de vujslica cerebri ana- tome [Fluddius] ob oculos ponit. Solent ab anatomicis illic delineari genitalia membra, utriusque sexus^ quod processus quidam ct sinus, cum in modum figurati sunt. Hie Fluddius invenit, non quod pucri in faba, illic dicit generari cogita- * Page 215. OF STERNE. S9 t'loncs ; quod mihi minim visum est, cum ego aliquando joculare carmen de ente rationis scriberem, et, ferente ita genio carminis, joci gratia finxissem, illic ge- nerari entia rationis, postea cum incidi in istud Fluddii, quod ne somniando quidcm cogitaveram, invenisse me, serio hasc asseri a Fluddio," * I am not acquainted with the founda- tion of the curious passages respecting the possibility of baptizing infants in uterOf^ but I find that Mauriceau adverts to the circumstance, in his attack on the Csesarean operation : " il n' y a pas d* oc- casions ou on ne puisse bien donner le Bapteme a 1' enfant, durant qu' il est encore au ventre de la mere, estant facile de porter de 1' eau nette par le moyen du canon d' une seringue jusques sur quelque partie de son corps'* He then obviates a difficulty unthought of by Sterne's doctors ; which persuades me * MorhofF. Polyhist. Philos. lib. ii. p. 1, cap. 15. t Tristram Shandy, vol. i. chap, xx. 4 ILLUSTRATIONS that this passage of Mauriceau had not occurred to him " et il seroit inutile d' allegucr que 1' eau n* y peut pas etre conduite, il cause que 1' enfant est en- velope de ses membranes, qui en em- pt^chent ; car ne s9ait-on pas qu' on les peut rompre tres ais^ment, en cas qu' ellcs ne le fussent pas, apres quoi on peut toucher effectivement son corps."* This writer has also mentioned the mischievous eftect of strong pressure, applied to the heads of very young chil- dren ; which is connected with another tlicory that Sterne has diverted himself with. I have not met with the original of it in my reading, but will give a passage from Bulwer's Anthropometamor- phosis, analogous to Mauriceau's.-|- * Mauric. Maladies des Femraes Grosses, p. 347. (edit, 3me. 4to. 1681-) t I knew a gentleman who had diyers sons, and the mid wives and nurses with headbands and strokings had so altered the natural mould of their heads, that they proved children of a very weak understanding. His last son only, upon advice given him, had no restraint OF STERNE. 41 TJiere is one passage in the seventh volume, which the circumstances of Sterne's death render pathetic. A be- liever in the doctrine of pre-sentiment would think it a prop to his theory. It is as striking as Swift's digression on madness, in the Tale of a Tub. " Was I in a condition to stipulate with Death -I should certainly declare against submitting to it before my friends ; and therefore I never seriously think upon the mode and manner of this great catastrophe, which generally takes up and torments my thoughts as much as the catastrophe itself, but I constantly draw the curtain across it with this wish, that the Disposer of all things may so order it, that it happen not to me in my own house but rather in some decent imposed upon the natural growth of his head, but was left free from the coercive power of headbands and other artificial violence, whose head, although it were bigger, yet he had more wit and onderstanding than them all. Artificial Channeling, p. 42. Vol. II. i> i^ ILLUSTHATIONS inn At home, I know it, 1\^ con- cern of ir^y jfri^^s, and the l^ist spivices of wiping my bf,ows and smoothing my plijow, will so crucify my soul, that I stall die pf a distCinapei' wliich my phy- sician is f^ awaare x)f : but ijn an .tnn, the few cojcj ^fl^ces I wanted, would be p^rc^^ed with ^ few guinea^ and paid me with 4W undisturbed but punctual attention/* It is known that Ste^iie 4ie<;l in hired lodgings, ajnd I have been told, t))at his attendants robbed hi^n even oi his gold sleeve-4piuttqi;i, while he was expiring. Yet a paragraph in Burnet's History of his owj} Tnin.es has been poinited out, in fS period.ipal WRJfK^ from which both thp senfin^eiits ancj expr4?ssions of Sterne, in diis pa^sa^^ wefe cprtai^Jy taken. This appears to me one of the most curious detections of his imitations ; but 1 shall not be surprised if many others, equally Gentleman's Magazine, for June, 1798^ ujptdc*- thc .i5l^ita^g .(>f I^ * OF STERNE. 49 unexpected, should be noticed hereafter. The extract from Burnet follows : "He [Archbishop Leighton] used often to say, that if he were to choose a place to die in, it should be an inn ; it looking like a pilgrim's going home, to whom this world was all as an inn, and who was weary of the noise and confusion in it. He added, that the officious ten- derness and care of friends was an entan- glement to a dying man ; and that the unconcerned attendance of those that could be procured in such a place, would give less distui-bance." * The real source of this thought, how- ever, is in the Cato of Cicero : " Ex vita ista discedo, tanquam hospitio, non tan- quam eK domo : commorandi enim na- tura diversorium nobis dedit, non habi- tandi locum.'* Sterne has amused himself with a pane- gyric on the literary benefits of shaving : " 1 inaintain it, the conceits of a rough- ^ Vol. ii. p. 259, 8yo. D 2 A4, ILLUSTRATIONS bearded man arc seven years more terse and juvenile for one single operation ; and if diey did not run a risk of being shaved quite away, might be carried up, by continual shavings, to the very highest pitch of sublimity."* It is an honour to think like great men ; upon this occa- sion, I must introduce Sterne to no less a personage than the Macedonian hero.- Before one of Alexander's battles, Par- menio presented himself, to give an account of his arrangements, and to enquU*e whether any thing remained to be done : nothing, said Alexander, but that the men should shave. Shave ! cried Parmenio: yes, replied the Prince; do you not consider what a handle a^ long beard affords to the enemy P-f '"'"' Peter I. of Russia gave the clearest proof that he reckoned the Custom of shaving essential to the progtess of civili- - I :. y .J Tristram Shandy^ vqI* chap. 13^.1 .,^jp j^f I f t Barbat. de Barbiganio, in Dornaviiu's Amphi theatrum Sapient ite. OF ST:^NE. 45 zatlon: it is pity tliat Sterne did not quote this convincing historical example. Horace, too, seems to have thought that his philosopher would have reasoned better without his beard : :/! -Di te, Damasippe, Deteque Verum ob consilium donent tonsore f j- Memoires patticuliers relatif a I'histoire de France. Tome 5 iettie. Memoires de Pieire de Fenin, p- 45S. II, s'en vint done jusques a Sens ou il mit le siege tout autour, et leur fit signifier qu'ils rendissent la viHe au Roy Charles: mais ils n'en voulurent rien faire. Dedans estoit de la part du Dauphin le Seigneur de Boutonvilliers a tout environ trois cens coiiibatans. La fut le roy Charles, le roy Henri, & le Due d Bourgongne sept jours avant qu'ils voulussent parle- Snenter : mais quand ils virent qu'il y avoit si grande puissance, & qu'ils n* auroient aucune secours, ils vou- lurent trouver leor Traite ; partant le roy Henri cnvoya Cornuaille parler a eux- Q.uand le dit Cornuaille (qui bien apper^eut qu'ils etoient en danger) fut venu assp;^ pres de la porte pour parler a eux, il vint a lui un gentil-homme qui avoit grande barbe, mais quarid ' Coirnuaille le vid, il lui dit, qii'U ne pculeroit poini 'd* lui s*il n' avoit sa barbe mieux fuite, Sf que ce n'eioi^ point la guise ed by Lord Bunstanville, tliough not very poetical, may be, to some readei^Sj ^ agrceirfjle commentary on tbis passage* I ^Sht not! a! the lsi\>^eF^^ gafte* Ne shoulder climers clown the stairsy. I vaunt not manhood by debates, t ertvy rtot the miser's ^ars. But mean) iw state, an J cali* insplffe; ' My fishiul pond is my delight. Where equal distant island' viev\"s His forced banks, and otter's cage,. Where salt andC fresh the pool reniews. As spring and drought inoifeasfe or swaige; Where boat presents his service- prest), And net becomes the fishes nest. Where sucking millet, swallowing bjtsse. Side-walking crab, wry-mouthed flouk. And slip -fist eel, as eveniiigs pass. For safe bait at due place do look. Bold to approach, quick to espy. Greedy to catch, ready to fly. * Tristram Shandy, vol. It, chap. t^yH, 62 ILLUSTRATIONS In heat the top, in cold the deep. In spring the mouth the raids in neap. With changeless change by shoals thy keep. Fat, fruitful, ready, but not cheap, ant, saleable book, coute que coute ; and after taking his general plan from some of the older * I have seen some anecdotes of Sterne, in the European Magazine, in which Madame de L mentioned in the Sentimental Journey, was said to be Madame de Lamberti, and the Count de B- , the Count de Bretoeil ; upon what authority I do not know. lu.u^^ . OF STERNE. 53 French writers, and from Burton, he made prize of all the good thoughts that came in his way. Voltaire has compared the merits of Rabelais and Sterne, as satirists of the abuse of learning, and, I .think, has done neither of them justice. This great dis- tinction is obvious; that Rabelais derided absurdities then existing in full force, and intermingled much sterling sense with the grossest parts of his book ; Sterne, on the contrary, laughs at many exploded opinions, and forsaken foo- leries, and contrives to degrade some of his most solemn passages by a vicious levity. Rabelais flew a higher pitch, too, than Sterne. Great part of the voyage to the Pays dc Lantemois* which so severely stigmatizes the vices of the Romish clergy of that age, was per- * I do not rqcoUect to have seen it observed by Rabelais's Commentators, that this name, as well a the plan of the Satire, is imitated from Lucian'i Tnn History. Lucian's town is called I-ychnopolis. j[# ILLUi;TRATK)NS tormed 441 more hazard of fire than water. The follies of the learned may as justly be corrected, as the vices of hypocrites ; but far tlie former, ridicule is a sufficient puiMsbment. Ridicule is even more efi'ecLual to this purpose, as well as mare agreeable than scuiriJity, which is gene- rally preferred, notwidistanding, by the learned themselves in their contests, be^ cause anger seizes tlie readiest weapons ; Jamqae faces et saxa vokint ; faror arma ministrat^ And where a little extraordinary power has accidentally been lodged in the hands of disputants, they have not scrupled to employ the most cogent methods of convincing their adversaries. Dionysius the younger sent those critics who dis- liked his verses, to work in the quarries;* and there was a pleasant tyrant, men- tioned by Horace, who obliged his defi- cient debtors to hear him read his own cofn|x>sitions, amaras hfstorm, by way * Plutarch. OF STERNE. 66 of comiTaiitation. I say nothing of the " holy faitb of pike and gun," nor of the stfiOng cudgel with which Luther ternunatqd a tljeological dispute, as I desire to avoid religious controversy. But it is impossible, on this subject, to forget the oncp-celebrated Dempster, the last of th^ formidable sect of Hoplomachists, who fouglit every day, at his school in Paris, eitlier with sword or fist, in defence jt)f his doctrines in omni scibili.* The imprisonment of Galileo, and the ex* ample of Jordano Bruno, burnt alive for asserting the plurality of worlds, -( among other disgraceful instances, shew that laughter is the best crisis of an ardent disputation. The talents for so delicate an office as that of a literary censor, are too great and numerous to be often assembled in * Jan. Nic. Erytbrae. Pinacothec. f Brucker. His. Critic. Philosoph. torn. v. p. 28, 29. The famous Scic^pius published a shocking letter of exultation on this execution. 56 ILLUSTRATIONS one person. Rabelais wanted decency, Sterne learning, and Voltaire fidelity, Lucian alone supported the character properly, in those pieces which appear to be justly ascribed to him. As the narrowness of party yet infests philo- sophyi a writer with his qualifications would still do good service in the cause of truth. For wit and good sense united, us in him they eminently were, can attack nothing successfully which ought not to be demolished. ADDITIOlM. SWTES to the ILLUSTRATIONS OF STERNE. iVofc J. pa^e 10. The following extract from the Pieces Interessantes et pen connues, p. 196, may serve in place of a whole history. " II y a un fait assez curieyx, tr^s-sur et peu comiu, au sujet da collier de V ordre du S. Esprit : la devotion s' allioit autrefois avec le plus grand debordement des moeurs, et la mode n' en est pas absolument passee. Le motif public de Henri in. en instituant /* orrfre du Saint-Esprit, fut la defense de la catholicite, par une association de seigneurs qui ambitionneroient d' y entrer. Le vceu secret fut d' en feire hommage a sa attle tvith shouts and acclamations, like the noise of the cranes, when they fly scream- ing over the ocean, bearing slaughter and death to the pygmies : 'HyT$ Trep uXayyri ytpavov jTeXet npavodi frph, AW eTiti 5 x^ifiuva ^vyov tcai oBetrpaTcv Ofj^povg Kx77ri rouye wetovtoi, ev TlKsavm poaavy *Avlpaffi Hvyfjcduoiin fovov iica mpa (pepau-M.* Aristotle delivers their history as an indubitable truth. " It is not fabulous, but certain, that a diminutive race of men, and it is said of horses, exists; living in caverns, whence they take the name of Troglodytes. They fight with raTies."-f But it was not enough with the older * Iliad, r. t Histor. Animal, lib. viii. cap. xii. VARIETIES OF* MAN. 71 naturalists, to^^ shorten a whole nation to three spans, or to oblige men per Arenas Caudarum longos sinuatim ducere tractus; but the specie^ ti^s ' torto?red into more fantastic shapes than are to be found in the Temptation of St. Anthony. These transfigurations rest both on Pagan and Christian authority, and if any thing could be supported by the mere force of repeated assertion, the monstrous varieties of man would become undeniable. Some of the Rabbis have published extravagant doctrines respecting our fir^ parents, on this subject, according to Bayle. " Quelques-uns d'eux disent qu' Eve fut formee de la queue de son mari. lis pretendent que Dieu, aiant donn6 d' abord un queue au corps d' Adam, s' aper9ut enfin qu' elle diminuoit la beaut6 de cet ouvrage, et qu' ainsi il prk la resolution de la couper, mais il ne laissa pas de s'en servir pour en produire 72 OF CERTAIN ]a femme <^ii* il donna ayi. premier 1100}.; mc."* ,,?,.. ^ ..^jj Piiny exerted surprising Industry in accOmulating authorities for human mon- sters ; -j- many of these were supposed to exist among the northern nations, suclj as the Arimaspi, who had only one eye, and employed themselves in stealing gold from the Gryphons, those compound animals which the ancient naturalists have dressed up for us. Milton employs this fable in a fine simile, describing Satan's laborious flight through the chaos. As when a Gryphon through the wilderness "With winged course, o'er hill or moory dale, /'> Porsues the Arimaspian, who by stealth ^ .^r Had from his wakeful custody purloin'd ' The guarded gold. Par. Lost. b. ii- 945;* One of the audiorities quoted for this story is Herodotus, who expressly says that he does not believe it. :{: * Bayle, Diction,. Crit. Art. EvB. f Lib. viii. c. ii. : Clio. VARIETIES OF MAN. 73 Anotlier race of tlie Scythians were born with feet turned behind the leg, " aversis post crura plantis," and were (of course) wonderfully swift. Others had heads resembling those of dogs, with long ears, and were armed with talons ; Ctesias says, they were in number one hundred and twenty thousand. This is " profound and solid lying." In other nations, the people were monocolous, that is, having only one leg,* or scia- podous, having feet so large as to shelter the whole body, in a supine posture ; these were the first parasols : In majori aestu humi jacentes resupini, umbra se pedum protegunt. Near these, accord- ing to Pliny, lived the pygmies, but they must be confessed to look extremely small beside such astonishing neighbours. Yet they had still better company ; for westward of the pygmies lived a nation without necks, and with eyes in their * See modern autliorities for this ?tory, in the Orig. and Prog, of Lang. vol. i. b. ii, c. iii. VOL. II. F 7* OF CERTAIN shoulders; and near them, the Astomores, who have no mouths, and are nourished by the smell of fruits and flowers. This is the substance of a chapter which has ornamented the pages of many a naturalist and cosmographer, with figures so ingeniously horrible, as almost to beget a belief of their reality, by the apparent difficulty of feigning them. It must be owned, in vindication of Pliny, that he asserts none of these won- ders without authority, and that many of them are mentioned simply as facts advanced by former writers. Several of his relations are taken from those of the Greeks, said to have been employed by Alexander in embassies to the eastern princes. Pliny's attention has preserved the folly of these men, which could have well been spared, to our days. Pomponius Mela* says, the pygmies inhabited pait of Egypt, and fought * Lib. iii. c. 34. VARIETIES OF MAN. 75 With the dan es to preserve their corhl Solinus also asserts their existence.* i J' Strabo remarks, on this sul)ject, that most of the writers on India, before his age, were egregious liars. Aulus Gellius, however, asserts the existence of pygmies,*}- and Eustathius^ in the notes on Dionysiu^^ ^' ^^nr^^l 3n: * In the modem editions of St. Auffustiiio's \Yorks,- this passage is retrenched* . J5 4 ^ ; , *. . . i , j * F 3 . 7$ OF CERTAIN The force of party has extended even to these fictions, apparently remote enough from either civil or religious divisions. Thus, the Monachus AlarlnuSf Episcopus Marinas, SC Vitulo- Monachus, in Ambrosini's edition of the frightful folio of Aldrovandus de Monstris, seem to have been engendered in the extrcT mity of hatred against religious orders. It is to be regretted, that among his other treasures, Palaephatus has omitted to place a derivation of the belief in Pygmies : possibly because the word did not admit of a pun. There is no proof, unless this fable be supposed a proof, that the ancients were acquainted with those varieties, which are really inferior to the usual standard of human size; was this opinion an approach to the hypothesis of the Scale of Beings ? Such it seems to have been in the hands of Paracelsus, who supposed the Pygmies to be difterent in their origin from men, and to consist of the CQro Non Adamica. VARIETIES OF MAN. 79 Scaliger is blamed by Aldrovandus, in liis Treatise de Monstris,* and by Bulwer, in his Artificial Changeling,-\ for denying the existence of Pygmies, because they cannot be found in Ethiopia or Arabia, where Pliny and Mela had placed them : this circumstance, both the moderns think of no weight; argumentum nullius valoris. They missed one strong argu- ment, that is, Pomponius Mela's asser- tion, that the Pygmies were extirpated by their wars with the cranes. Of this Addison has availed himself very success- fully, in his War of the Pi/gmies and Cranes ; in the introduction to which, he has raised up a new and beautiful landscaj^e of the ruins of the Pygmean empire : Nunc si quis dura evadat per saxa viator, Desertosque lares, et valles ossibus albas Exiguis videt, et vestigia pavva stupescit. Desolata tenet victrix impune volucris Regna, et secure crepitat Grus improba nido. * Page 40. t Page 499. ' F 4 80 OF CERTIAN He has even furnished, from this story, a highly poetical origin of the fairies : Elysli valles nunc agmine lustrat inani, Et veterum Heroiim miscetur grandibus umbris Plebs paiva : aut si quid fidei mereatur anil\s Fabula, Pastores per noctis opaca pusillas Sajpe vident Umbras, Pygmaeos corpore cassos, Dum secura Gruum, et veteres obliia labores, Laetitiae penitus vacat, indulgetque choreis, Angustosque terit calles, viridesque per orbes Turba levis salit, et lemurum cognomine gaudet* Unless we can resolve to adopt Mela's account of tlie matter, however, I believe Scaliger's objection must remain in full * Perhaps we owe this elegant passage to the follow- ing lines in Paradise Lost, where the fallen spirits in Pandemonium contract their size to gain room, and Throng numberless, like that Pygmean race Beyond the Indian Mount, or faery elves. Whose midnight revels by a forest side Or fountain, t>ome belated peasant sees. Or dreams he sees, while over-head the moon Sits arbitress, and nearer to the earth Wheels her pale course, they on their mirth and dance Intent, with jocund music charm his ear ; At once with joy and fear his heart rebounds. Book i* ver- 780 VARIETIES OF MAN. 81 force, against the existence of Linnaeus's Troglodyte ; for pygmies arc not found in the habitations which he assigns them, namely, the confines of Ethiopia, the caves of Java, Amboyna, and Ternate, or in Malacca. The Albinos, on whose peculiarities he appears to found his defi- nition, were never proved to exist as a nation ; * on the contrary, wherever the history of an Albino could be traced, it was found to have been born in ordinary society. It is true Linnasus attempts to distinguish between his Troglodyte and man, by ascribing to the former the Alembrana Nictitans, but anatomists in general know very well, that man pos- sesses that membrane also, though with- out the power of expansion. Besides, Linnaeus's Troglodytes are placed at a very great distance from the supposed seat of the Albinos, which is said by the best authorities in this case to be near the isthmus of Darien. Whether, * Wafer's single testimony is not sufficient proof 2 OF CERTAIN tlien, the Pygmean history he derived from the frequent appearance of dwarfs in society, or whetlier, like the Short Club in ilie Guardian, it be the inven- tion of ambitious little men, we must send back ^tfJe small infantry Warr'd on by cranes- to the poetical quarter, for sound geogra- phy and natural history disclaim them. Linnaeus admits, with rather more hesitation, his variety of the Homo Cau- datus : he is uncertain whether he ought to be ranked with men or apes, and is deterred from placing him among the latter, chiefly because he lights his ow^n fire, and roasts his victuals. " Homo Caudatus, hirsutus, incola orbis antarc- tici, nobis ignotus, ideoque utrum ad hominis aut simiae genus [^ertineat, non determino. Mirum quod ignem excitet, carnemque asset, quamvis et cruda voret, testimonio peregrinantium.* Of the few * Systera* N^ur- torn. VARIETIES OF MAN. 83 authorities which Linnaeus has produced in support of this variety, I have only been able to consult one ; but others have occurred to me at different times, which I am now going to mention. Pausanias is the most ancient authority for the existence of men with tails.* He is more frequently quoted to this pur- pose, because he derived his story from the very person who saw such a race, in the InsuliE Satyriades, at which he touched, on being driven westward while he was sailing for Italy. The inhabitants, says Pausanias, are red, and have tails not much less than those of horses. Pliny introduces among his other won^ ders, men with hairy tails, of wonderful swiftness, but I think without any autho- rity. This is all the testimony afforded by antiquity of the Caudatory variety, unless the fable of the Fauns be reckoned some confirmation. Modern times have produced more advocates for it. After * Attic lib. i. p. 43. 84 OF CERTAIN the natives of Europe began to pene- trate into the east, authorities multipHed. Marco Paolo, who had tlie late to be disbelieved in every credible assertion, was believed, when he reported that he saw in the kingdom of Lanibri men with tails of the length of a span.* Peter Martyr describes a nation in India, who have hard, immoveable, crooked tails, of a span long, resembling those of cro- codiles ; so inconveniently appended, adds he, that they are obliged to use perforated seats. Majolus, Androvandus, and Bulwer, quote a story from Major, and Joannes Neirembergensis, of a generation pro- duced with tails, in Kent, or Dorset- shire, as a punishment of some disrespect shewed to the missionary, St. Augustine, soon after his landing. Bulwer was informedj-f" that in his time, there was a family in Kent, whose descendants * Lib' in- c. XV ill' t Artif. Chang, p. 410 i.. ;i.i VARIETIES OF MAN. 85 were tailed ; " insomuch," says he, " that you may know any one to be rightly descended of that family, by having a tail." He adds, as a more probable account, that the inhabitants of Stroud, near Rochester, incurred the curse of tails, by cutting off the tail of Archbishop Becket's horse. " Insomuch as you may know a man of Stroud by his long taile. And to make it a little more credible, that the rump-bone, among brutish and strong-docked nations, doth often sprout out with such an excrescence, or beastly emanation, I am informed by an honest young man of Captain Morris's company, in Lieutenant General Ireton's regiment, that at Cashel in the county of Tipperary, in the province of Munster, in Carrick Patrick church, seated on a hill or rock, stormed by the Lord Inchiquin, and where there were near seven hundred put to the sword, and none saved but the major's wife and his son ; there were found among the slain of the Irish, when m OF .CERTAIN. / f tliey were stripped, divers tliat had tails near a quarter of a yard long. The relator, being very diffident of the truth iff this story f after enquiry, was ensured of the certainty thereof, by forty soldiers, that testified upon their oaths they were eye-witnesses, being present at the action. It IS reported, also that in Spain there is such another tailed nation.", jj.^j,., ^. y/QfiJ The story of the miracle of St. Angus* tine seems to have gained currency in early times, as we learn from a passage in Fuller's Worthies. " When there hap pened in Palestine a diiFerence betwixt, Robert, brother of Saint Lewis king of France, and our William Longspee, Earl of SaHsbury, heare how the Frenchman insulted our nation. Matthew Paris, A. D. 1250, p. 790. O timidorum caudatorum formidolositas ! quam beatus, quam mun- dus praesens foret exereitus, si a caudis purgaretur et caudatis. " O the coward- liness of these fearful longtails ! how; happic, how cleane would this our armie VARIETIES OF MAN. 87 he, were it but purged from tailes and longtailes.'* * I might add the testimony of Sir John Maundevyle, of fabulous memory, were there not reason to fear, that in the con- ceptions of unphilosophical readers, he would disgrace so much good company. There is less necessity for employing any doubtful evidence, because the celebrated Dr. Harvey is my next witness. He introduces a story of a tailed nation, in his fourth Exercitation de Generatione Animalium, chiefly, it would seem, for the sake of the fact, for it has very little connection with his subject, " Chirurgus quidam," saith the learned doctor, " vir probus, mihique familiaris, ex India Orientali redux, bona fide mihi narravit, in Insular Borneae locis a mare remoti- oribus & montosis, nasci hodie genus hominum caudatum (uti olim alibi acci- dissc apud Pausanium legimus) e quibus aegr(^ captam virgi^iem (sunt enim sylvi- * Fuller's Worthias. Kent. 88 OF CERTAlxN colai) ipse vidit, cum cauda carnosa, crassa, spithamas longitudine, intra du- nes rcflexa, quae anum & pudenda ope- liebat." Slight hints are sufficient tor men of genius ; and we may perceive by the inference we are about to add, with how much reason nature is jealous of discovering her mysteries, since Dr. Harvey having gotten a tail of a span long into his hands, immediately fathoms the iinal cause of the structure witii it ; " Usque adeo velari ea loca voluit natura/* , This great authority proved a seasonable support to the caudatory system, at a time when anatomists were much divided concerning it. Among some it made such progress, that Caspar Hoffman did not scruple to call the Os Coccygis* the mark of a tail in untailed animals ; " Cauda in non-caudalis 7iota." But Rio- Ian, that pompous declaimer on the dignity of the human frame, sharply rcprcliendcd Hofl'man for this irreverend expression, which shocked his delicacy VARIETIES OF MAN. 89 severely, and moreover touched him in a tender part ; 1 mean, his hypothesis of the final cause of the sedentary pos- ture. " Homo enim ad sedendi com- moditatem," says he, "solus nates habet, ut commod^ sedere possit ad meditandum et philosophandum. Sedens enim anima (ex Aristot. 7. Phys.) prudentior est." Diemerbroeck, an eminent writer On the plague, and author of a System of Anatomy, in quarto, says, he saw a child newly born (in 1638), which had a tail a foot and half in length, resem- bling a monkey's. The mother told him, that she had been frightened by a mon- key at an early period of gestation. Aldrovandus gives a figure of a mon-^ strous foetus with a tail ; Caspar Schottus (in 1662) introduced a tailed man into his Choice Collection of Prodigies; what a happy time had literary men, when philosophical books were made up of such diverting extravagancies ! In that volume of the Miscellanea Vol. II. G so OF CERTAIN Curiosa, published in 1689, Dr. Michael Frederic Lochncr relates a qase of a Puer caudatus, which came u^der bis own inspection. The story, which must lose by repetition, out of the doctor's own quaint Latin, is briefly this. Dr. Lochner was consulted for the son of a respectable family, about eight years of age. When the particulars of his disease were en- quired into, the parents, instead of an- swering, shook their heads and wept. The doctor was confounded, till recol- lecting, he says, the Titulus jurisconsul- torius de ventre inspiciendo, he began to unbutton his patient's waistcoat ; but the patient stopped him, by giving him to understand that the complaint lay else- where : on exploring then the peccantis pueritias bifolium calendarlum (aS; h^ facetiously phrases it after Barlseus), he found a tail reflected between the but- tocks, of the length of a man's middle linger, and thickness of the thumb. The parents were desirous of amputation, but VARIETIES OF MAN. 91 the doctor persuaded them that no in- convenience would attend this ornament, and thus, says he, they retired peaceably with their Ascaniolus caudatus. He adds, that Dr. David Zollicofer observed a similar case at Basil, and the celebrated Blancard another in Holland. In another volume of the Miscellanea Curiosa, to which I cannot immediately refer, a learned physician describes a puer caudatus, whom he examined care- fully, in consequence of hearing him derided by his play-fellows, on the sub- ject of this unlucky appendage. I must regret my inability to consult the Collection de I'Academie Royale de Sciences,* for a paper on Men with Tails, published under the promising name of Otto Helbigius. I find a quo- tation from an author of this name, in Dr. Lochner's note, asserting the exist- ence of Homines Caudati in the island of Formosa. * This is a separate work from the Memoirs. G 2 92 OF CERTAIN Here the matter appears to have rested, till the year 1771, when Dr. Guindant published his Variations de la Nature dans V Espece Humaine, in which he took occasion to assert the existence of men with tails, and even to corroborate the opinion with new examples. One of these occurred at Orleans, in 1718, where the subject, ashamed of his tail, submitted to an operation for its removal, which cost him his life. There can be no doubt of this fact, because it was taken from the Mercure for the month of September in that year. Doctor Guindant mentions two other instances, at Aix in Provence, one of a girl named Martine, the other of a Procureur named Berard, but he does not specify the length of their tails. And in his extreme zeal for the caudatory system, he asserts, that a man's courage is not diminished by such an appendage; as a proof of which, he mentions the Sicur dc CruvcUier of La Ciotat, who, though he had a tail, distinguished him- VARIETIES OF MAN. 93 self greatly in some actions against the Turks. It is rather surprising, that the ingenious doctor did not consider the extraordinary necessity of courage, in a man who has a tail, as that peculiarity must expose him to many affronts. Dr. Guindant adds, but I fear from report, that the southern part of the island of Formosa, the Molucca and Philippine islands, contain whole races of men with tails, and that in the burn- ing desarts of Borneo, the greatest part of the inhabitants are tailed. An experimental philosopher of the highest reputation, furnishes another au- thority. ** Travellers make mention of a nation with tails, in the islands of Nicobar, Java, Manilla, Formosa, and others. Koping relates, that when the ship on which he was aboard anchored near Nicobar, a number of blackish yellow people, hav- ing cat's tails, came on board. They wanted iron in exchange for their parrots, G 3 . [ 94 OF CERTAIN but as nobody would trade with them, they wrung their birds' heads oF, and eat them raw. Bontius saw from the mountains, in the island Borneo,* a nation whose tails were only a few inches long, and in all probability only an elongation of the Os Coccygis. Ptolomy already had made mention of a people having tails," &c. &c.-f- The latest evidence of such conforma- tion (in the case of the school-master of Inverness:}:) is an honourable and learned writer, who has erected a most stupend- ous hypothesis on this unequal founda- tion of a span. What would Boileau's Ass say to all this evidence ? O ! que si 1* ane alors, d bon droit misantrope, Pouvoit trouver la voix qu'l eut au terns d'Esope, De tous cotez, docteur, voiant les hommes foux, * In viewing a sarage clothed with the skin of a quadruped, a traveller, intent on wonders, might mis- lake the tail of his piey for a natural appendage, f Bergman's Physical Description of the Earth, Orig. and Prog, of Lang. vol. i. b. ii. c. iii. VARIETIES OF MAN. 95 Qu' il diroit de bon coeur, sans en etre jaloux. Content de ses ciiardons, et secouant sa tete. Ma foi, Hon plus que nous, I'homme n'est qu'une bete ! There are few stonger proofs of the inutility of single observations, than this affair of the Homines Caudati. The only- solid foundation of any of these stories, is an accidental elongation of the os coc- cygis, which we can easily conceive to happen, as that bone consists of four pieces : redundancies in other parts of the body are so frequent, in monstrous cases, that we cannot wonder to find a joint occasionally added to this part. Thus it is, that a few instances of dwarfs are multiplied by writers into nations ; fewer instances of accidental mal-confor- mation of parts produce other nations in books. Men have complained for roany years, and we complain at present, of want of facts; yet it appears, that in books of good character we find more facts than can be credited. Do we not want good G 4 96 OF CERTAIN observers rather than new facts ? And is not the uidiscrimhiatc collection of facts an encreashig evil ? It is certain that in consulting authors on the subjects they profess to examine, we are com- monly as much disappointed as Mr, Shandy, when he applies to Rubenius for the ancient construction of a pair of breeches. Chemistry is perhaps improv- ing under the fashionable method, be- cause the principal experiments are fre- quently repeated, and because its objects being permanent, former errors have many chances of being discovered ; but in other branches of knowledge, the number of facts, on the whole, over- balances their credibility. It is unfortu- nate, that since the means of publication have been so much facilitated, every man thinks himself entitled to observe and to publish. How many collections of pretended facts are daily offered to medical men, in which it is happy for piankind if the author's weakness be VARIETIES OF MAN. 97 sufficiently evident, to destroy, at first sight, the credit of his observations ! Writers who pubhsh merely for the sake of reputation, may be solid enough for those who read for the sole purpose of talking, but every man who is in quest of real knowledge must lament, that so few books are written with a design to instruct, and so very many only to sur- prise or amuse. MENIPPEAN ESSAY on ENGLISH HISTORIANS. Tit oye ^vfMV eTspTrev, Iliad: ix. The following essay consists of prose and verse intermixed, a practice not very common at present, which njay therfore require some explanation. Among the French writers, this mode has been much used in many celebrated productions ; in this country, the excelleuce of Cowley's mixed pieces has served rather to deter, than to invite imitation. I recollect only two essuys written on this plan, the Polite Philosopher, and the Estay on Delicacy, the first by Mr, Forrest, and the latter by Dr. Lancaster ; but the poetry of those gentlemen differed so little from their prose, that the transition {Mtiduced no remarkable effect. It seems favourable to an author's exertions, that he should be obliged to proceed no farther in verse, than his poetical impulse determines him ; and that upon a change of subject, or a total deficiencj- of poetical ideas, he should be. per- mitted to betake himself to prose. The best poets are unequal^ and are obliged to admit occasionally weak or insipid verses, for the pur- pose of connecting the better parts of their work. But it must be- allowed, that many laborious productions would have been much unproved, if only the happier passages had appeared in the poetical form, and the remainder had been printed as plain prose. Much fatigue would thus have been spared to the author, and much disgust to the reader. It must be owned that there is something imposing in the appearance of verse; as a noted critic lately mistook the nonsense-verses in Pope's Miscellanies for a serious love poem ; but my proposal is intended for the relief of a class of writers very dif- ferent from Pope. MENIPPEAN ESSAY OISJ ENGLISH HISTORIANS. ilNCE English writers have disco- vered the secret of uniting elegance and interest with the narration of facts, histo- rical compositions have multiplied greatly in the language. The avidity with which they are perused was indeed to be expected, at a time when the love of reading proceeds to a degree of dissipa- tion. In these productions, the reader feels his understanding improved, and his taste gratified at the same time ; and for the sake of those who can only be allured by the dainties of knowledge, some historians have condescended to adopt the style of novelHsts, and to relieve the asperities of negociation and war, by tender dialogue and luscious description. 102 MENIPPEAN ESSAY ON If some writers, envious of the treasures they mean to impart, have sullenly in- volved themselves in Latin, they are however not more difficult than those who present us with aenigmatical Eng- Ibh. It was very lale, before the class of historians became a respectable depart- ment of our literature. The natural reserve and coldness of our countrymen seems even to have influenced their pub- lications, and to have made them sensible of the difficulty of telling the gravest story to the world. Meanwhile, tradi- tion, corrupted by poetry, and other seductive causes, offered our own history to the reader, in a state more proper to exercise his critical powers, than to fur- nish him with either agreeable or useful information. From bards, inspir'd by mead, or Celtic beer, 1 Burst forth the bloody feud, or vision drear, > Till each attendant bagpipe squfeak'd for fear:* j * At thy well-sharpen'd thumb, frm shore to shore The trebles squeak for fear, the bases roar. Mac Fleckno* ENGLISH HISTORIANS. 108 , They sung how Fia Mae CmA * controlled the fight. Or Merlin ravM with more than second-sight. Down Time's long stream the dying music floats. And cheats th' impatient ear with broken notes, LuU'd by the murmur, antiquarians snore* Of Highland-epics dream, and Druid-lore ; Or on the seeming steep, and shadowy plain. Hunt the glass-castle, or Phenician fane.f Next doleful ballads troll'd th' immortal theme. Sung to the car, or whistl'd to the team : ;{: Tho' wicked wits, from age to age, refuse The homely ditties of the hob-nail-muse. Long tost, the sport of mountain- air and winds,|] These P y comments, and these Edwards binds. Now from his store each restless rival draws Thyme's tamish'd flowers, blunt points, and rusty saws. Till our bright shelves, in gilded pride, display The trash our wiser fathers threw away. Our early hist'ry shuns the judging eye* In convents bred, the urchin learn'd to lie ; White phantoms wave their palms in golden meads. And the pale school-boy trembles as he reads. The later chroniclers, with little skill. Darkling and dull, drew round th' historic mill, * Fingal. f Glass-castle.] Vitrified forts in Scotland ; and this celebrated ship-temples ia Ireland. J Sung to the wheel, and sung unto the paile. Hairs Virgidem. 1| rapidis ladibria ventis. Vibc. 104. MENIPPEAN ESSAY ON In wild confusion strow'd, appear the feats -^ Of shews and battles, duels, balls* aud treats j'^'- ''^ Here the rich arms victorious Edward bore, "' ' There the round oaths which great Eliza swore : And quaint devices, justs, and knightly flames. And gay caparisons, and dainty dames. The most istrilcmg defect in the preseht figure of history, is not meagreness, but inflation, which distorts her features, and confounds her proportions. Like the Roman,* who thought it increased his dignity to wear robes too long for his bodyi and shoes too large for his feet, some of our writers in this style have endeavoured to adapt huge words, and immeasurable periods to every trifling occurrence. Such tumid lines a failing age betray. As bloated limbs bespeak the heart's decay. Some critics, fond of discovering ana- logies in science and art, have compared history with architecture : in this country, the progress of taste in both has some * PI in, Epistol. ENGLISH HISTORIANS. 105 degree of correspondence. The dark tales, and wild historical ballads, may- be compared to the caves and summer bowers of our remote ancestors. In the monkisli histories, the religious gloom of the monastery perpetually overshadows us. And indeed, the similarity of old histories to Gothic edifices is so impres- sive, that we often meet with the thought. Two beautiful passages immediately sug- gest themselves. Mr. Hay ley, in his Essay on History, says of Lord Claren- don : Yet shall his labours long adorn our isle. Like the proud glories of some Gothic pile : They, tho' constructed by a bigot's hand. Nor nicely finish'd, nor correctly plann'd,* With solemn majesty, and pious gloom. An awful influence o'er the mind assume ; And from the alien eyes of ev'ry sect Attract observance, and command respect. Strada, in the second part of his Muretus, offers us nearly the same image * This appears to me a harsh censure of the playful elegance, and complex regularity of Gothic architec- ture. Vol. H. h 106 MENIPPEAN ESSAY ON on the same subject : " ut nonnulla^ aedium sacrarum rudes attiitas ac vetustate propemodum corruptte religiosius inter- dum coluntur, qiiam qua2 magnifico sunt opere atque elegant! ; sic ilia iur curiosa sermon is structura ssepenumero majorem habet veneratiouem ac fidem." To pursue the figure, the works of our historians, who wrote before the reign of James I. may be compared to the old baronial castles, strong and dreary, full of dark and circuitous pas- sages, but interesting by the very melan- choly which they inspire. In these compositions, the glimmering sentiments, obscure explanations, and the inartificial combination of incidents, remind us of Gray's Rich windows, that exclude the light. And passages which lead to nothing-* As the study of the Greek and Latin writers prevailed among us, a mixed * Long Story, ENGLISH HISTORIANS. 107 style wao introduced, similar to that which we condemn in buildings of the seventeenth century; where we perceive an unsuccessful attempt to combine an- cient elegance with modern rudeness. Where an ornament, beautiful in itself, is often misplaced, so as to appear ridi- culous ; the artist, for example, trans- ferring those decorations which would have graced the nobler parts of the edifice, to add to the enormity of an over-grown chimney. At length the sera of elegant simplicity arrived, when our writers and artists became convinced, that the easiest me- thod of excelling, consisted ih' a^ clos^ imitation of the models of antiquity. "We have seen good taste carried nearly to its point of perfection; and as gr^at exertions seem to exhaust the moral, aS well as the physical world, we have perhaps witnessed the first symptoriis of its'^ decay. Robertson was simple and correct; Hume was more lofty, uniform, H 2 108 MENIPPEAN ESSAY ON and approached the point of Attic ele- gance. But other authors have thought it necessary, to cover their marble with gold and azure ; in their avidity of beau- ties, they have amassed the most incon^ gruous figures, and have blended them in one glare of barbarous magnificence.* An excess of polish and refinement, among other inconveniences, tempts the historian to suppress or vary the strong, original expressions, which trying occa- sions extort from men of genius. Yet these, infinitely superior to phrases which have cooled in the critical balance, al- ways form the brightest ornaments of a well-composed history. They transport our imagination to the scene, domesti- cate us with eminent men, and aftbrd us a kind of temporary existence in other ages. Few of our writers, excepting * Such writers oblige us to recollect Quintilian's observation respecting figures ; " sicut ornant oratio- nem opportune positae, ita ineptissimas esse cum imroodic^ petunlur." ENGLISH HISTORIANS. 109 Lloyd, have attended sufficiently to the preservation of these flashes of sentiment and intelhgence. A single word some- times conveys as much information of character and principles, as a whole dissertation. An old French historian, fbr example, in describing the punish- ment of some peasants, defeated in an insurrection, by an officer of the Empe- ror's, in 1525, displays the ferocious intolerance of that time by one epithet. '* II pun it grievemment les prisonniers, sign am men t les meurtriers du Comte d' Helfestein, et entre autres un, sur lequcl il pratiqua une GENTILLE inven- tion. Le criminel fut contraint amasser un tas de bois, autour d' un posteau, fich6 au milieu d* une grande place, auquel puis apres on le lie, d' une chesne portant un peu outre le bois. Ainsi quand V executeur eut allume le feu de toutes parts, le malheureux couroit autour se rotissant peu a peu luy mesme." * * Laval, Hist, des Guerres Civiles, p. 24, H 3 110 MENIPPEAN ESSAY ON When a prevalent taste for a certain smoothness and sple^idor of style is esta- blished, the value of such a decoration is easily over-rated. And vv^riters, capa- ble of doing good service by a laborious union of facts, arc compelled to waste their exertions, in imitating those favou- rite turns of expression, whicli they can never incorporate with their own diction, by the strongest mechanical efforts. It gives pain to a good-natured reader, to see his author engaged in such unavail- ing struggles ; for some persons can no more acquire a good style, than a grace- ful manner, and in both instances, the affectation of unattainable graces only adds distortion to clown ishness. Vain such a boast of polish'd style. We seem to hear the rasping file As thro' the labour'd lines we drudge ; If sullen nature grace deny. Not Vestris can the fault supply. Nor win to praise the sneering Judge. Indeed, if an elegant writer adopt a fa- vourite class of metaphors, it is pursued ETfGLISH HISTORIANS. Ill to extermination by his imitators. At one time, all occurrences were like a race ; afterwards they were like a battle ; lately, they have resembled a ship. At present, light and darkness are the fa- vourite sources of figures. Every subject is luminous, or shaded ; and every author, proud to exhibit his lanthorn at noon like Diogenes, is eager to " hold his farthing candle to the sun."* When an historian merely translates in patch-work, like Knolles (whom Dr. Johnson has unfortunately dragged into notice, by injudicious praise), he is easily misled by the formal track of those grave audiors, who treat all parts of their sub- jfct in the same manner. When the story thus comes unexpectedly to a full stop, a very ludicrous surprise often fol- lows the most tragical history. To avoid the offence of particular application, 1 shall try the effect of abstracting such si passage from Laval, whom I have just * Young's Love of Fame. H 4 U2 MENIPPEAN ESSAY ON quoted. It relates to the siege of Poitiers, by the French Protestants, in 1569. " On the 24th of August, the festival of St. Bartholomew, the besiegers began, early in the morning, to batter in breach, with twenty-two pieces of cannon ; and fired all day without intermission, so briskly that the whole city shook. They seemed determined to overturn every thing, by so furious an attack, for they had nev^er raged in such a manner before ; and it was said, that this was their last effort, if we could resist which, there would be nothing 'more to apprehend. Tliey were so dihgent, that they fired near eight hundred cannon sliot that day; so that several ofhcers declared, that con- sidering the number of their guns, it was impossible to keep up a more terrible discharge. ** The garrison expected the assault, about two or three o'clock in the after- noon, when it was supposed that the breach would be practicable ; and in ENGLISH HISTORIANS. 113 fact, about half an hour past one, it was so large, that for more than an hundred paces, a man on horseback, in complete armour, might have entered it without difficulty. About that time, therefore, the enemy drew up in order of battle, on the rising ground of the suburb, covered in front by a wall, which extends from St. Cyprian to the said suburb. They were all in white sui;coats and we could see their officers flying from rank to rank, haranguing and encouraging them. They seemed to threaten, at the same time, the Pre V Abbesse and Pont Joubert, which, notwithstanding the in- undation, they expected to force: they had also on this side another division of their troops, who were in full expectation of supping in the town, and called to our people to get ready for them. In the mean time, they fired from all their batteries, especially on those places which they designed to attack. " The poor townspeople, though quite 1J4 M'ENIPPEAN ESSAY ON unaccustomed to such thunder, were in- defatigable in carrying beds, fascines, barrels, and other tilings, to cover the breach. Every one did his duty, without being terrified by seeing his neighbour fall. A single bullet would carry off four or five good soldiers; and several poor people, workmen, and others, were killed while they were busy in repairing the breach ; while jthe nobility who were present were covered with the blood of the slain, yet kept their posts to en- courage the men. It is a certain fact, diat several persons were killed between the legs of the Sieurs du Lude and de Ruflbc, so that their clotlies were dyed in blood, yet they did not quit the breaeh, but shewed themselves on tlie top of it, to evince their alacrity to encounter the enemy. When they saw what countenance the enemy kept, the alarm-bell was rung, to give notice of the assault, and the Srs. de Guise and du Lude, having ordered every one to ENGLISH HISTORIANS. 115 Jiis post, took, respectively, the charge of the breaches, one of that of Pre r Abbesse, and the whole of that face ; the other, of that which was made that day, between St. Radegonde and St. Sulpice ; both very large, and difficult to be defended. The Italians being prepared to go to the breach, and harangued by one of their leaders, swore on the crucifix to die sooner than to fail in their duty. And before they took, their post, falling on their knees, in the church of St. Radegonde, they devoted themselves to God with such earnestness, that the by- standets could not refrain from tears. " In the mean time, the principal ladies of Poitiers retired into the castle, and betook themselves to their prayers with great fervency. A strong body of horse patroled the. streets, to prevent dis- orders, and compel the people to assist in the defence. Every thing thus pre- pared, Mr. de Guise and his brother. 116 MENIPPEAN ESSAY ON with a good troop of brave men, guarded all the breaches of Pre V Abbesse and Pont Joiibert (where the town was open to an assault), and at the grand breach, newly made, was the Count du Lude, who defended the centre, with the Sieur de Ruffec and other gentlemen on his right. The Sieur de Montpezac, with some gentlemen of his dependance, was stationed on the left. " The enemy, who, from the rising" grounds, saw almost every thing that passed in the town, perceiving the firm countenance which the garrison shewed, DID NOT COME TO THE ASSAULT." However ridiculous this lame and impotent conclusion may appear, it is yet more inconvenient, that liistorians, fond of a figurative style, are extremely averse to deliver any fact, in a manner intelligible to readers less instructed than themselves. They often notice an im- portant event, as a possible case, and tempt the reader, from the plain road ENGLISH HISTORIANS. 117 of narration, into pleasing and sportful fields of digression, where he is some- times arrested by a display of the " non- vulgaris eruditio," and sometimes by ex- hibitions not very suitable to the dignity of history. Let us suppose an author of this class to describe some event, which he desires to rescue from obscurity, such as the taking of Cashel in Ireland, during Cromwell's usurpation ; a fact equally illustrious with many, which the in- dustry of modern historians has deigned to illuminate. " A numerous body of natives, dis- trusting the mercy of the victors, had fortified themselves on the steep and difficult hill of Cashel, in the county of Tipperary. A royal residence, converted by the piety of its monarch into a mag- nificent cathedral, and once dignified by the priesdy functions of the Prince of Munster, offered at once the means of defence, and the motives of resistance. 118 MENIPPEAN ESSAY ON A generous enemy would have respected the attachments of piatriotism and reli- gion ; but Ireton had learned to despise the impression of episcopal grandeur. *' On the northern side of the choir, was elevated one of those lofty, conical- towers, which have exercised the genius of antiquaries, respecting their origin and^ destination. The most probable opinion^ assigns them to the sect of Stylita* anchorites, who to withdraw their atten- tion more completely from sublunary objects, mounted the aspiring summit of a tower or pillar, and consumed the revolving years of a monotonus existence, in gazing intently on the heavenly bodies. Some of the ancient philosophical sects,* iicceived their denominations from tileit* places of instruction : these holy lileni * '* Dr. Campbell, in his Philosophical Survey of the South of Ireland, supposed these towers to have been belfries, because he found bells or bell-ropes in riost of those which he had seen. Post hoc, ergo proji- ter hoc, I fear, is ba^ logic. The best view of one of these towers, is in the Virtuosi's Museum, plate xxiv." ENGLISH HISTORIANS. no condescending, in this instance, to follow a heathen example, took the name of pillar-climbers, from the seat of their contemplations. " Simeon, a shepherd of Syria, founded this sect in the eighth century. Perhaps, as superstition is strongly imitative, the austerities of Simeon drew their origin from the mysterious exercises, annually performed in Syria, on elevations appa- rently very different in their original desis^n. From the traditional honours- of the colossal symbols, dedicated by Bacchus to Juno, in the sacred city,* * '* See the treatise Uepi thj 2u^/h; 3h8, inserted among Lucian^s pieces. In the description of the temple of Hierapolis, the author, whoever he wa^ treats at some length of these singular antiquities. ** Kcti ^ahMi 3c egsKTi Ev rotffi 'mpo'jrv>.atotcri 3W xapra jt*eya^ol. stti tuv 7raDtu>A, i^i his. lion- wig; : !l and the author, presuming on his reader's inadvertence, does not scruple to bestow youth, and the hearts of young ladies on a paralytic senator, or to represent a beauty as inexperienced and frail in her grand climacteric. An anachronism of thirty or forty years, however injurious to ancient characters,, ,)^.,g^iy ..over- looked : . . ; .^ i.l t>(\ i-r .i-(f..'t-; :r \ I 2 124 , MEj:)Il]RJ?EA$f'.^SS^A^:p^.j Thus harshly Maro treats the Tyrian dame : Tho' sev'ring time protects' ner^jpotle^s fafti^s * '' ' Safe from the pibUs chief's imputed lust, > '/lOJein Scarce ev'n their skeleton^ cpuld, friingle iiiu:- ,>'(oq/'3 , So pure, so holy, so divine, j' Kound which ev n wits and scholars weep ; .'j> The nymph, who on the mountain's steep'*' ' ' -i! on ^^^^ mpre adorn'd ppor Darnley^s brow | , ^ Would rouse her from her tedious sleep, -it*-. With many a hymn, and many avow; And drawing from her bosom deep '.ulii i.' ; , . Those tales 'bout which historians vary,)'.' ifeeg, while her humble sinews bow, J ai^i^^j.Qtection from thg new St. Mary, . r ' .' ^ . f 1 (llBffT ol * See the profile of Queen Mary, in that work, where the features are very different from the pinched cheeks and turned up nose of the celebrated medal, from which it is said to be taken. It is a curious^fact, that the portrait alluded to, is copied from a profile of Julia Gonzaga. ' r-,\ . f A tradiaon, from , which a hill, in the neighbour- hood of Linlithgow, takes the denomuiation of Cocu le Roy. 13 126 MENIPPAN ESSAY ON By the uncertainty of historical truth, and by the appearance of success, which in certain periods, attends the worst men, and the most wicked designs, some have been induced to prefer romantic to real history, as the more favourable to virtue. Rut iiction is always more feeble than truth; for the most difficult task of ima- gination, is the invention of incidents; and those who wish to improve by experience, cannot be too accurate in determining the real connection of the facts, from which they are to conclude. A fable may illustrate a moral apoph- thegm, but can adc(, p(> |Qrc^, ^(^ a poli- tical maxim. Some eminent philosophers, on the contrary, attaching too much importance to mathematical demonstration, have wi4i^d; tjPf 0(?injipe' the knowledge of history to certain undeniable facts, and would deprive us of soine of its most engaging passages, to prevent the possir Iniity of deception. But the essence of ENGLISH HISTORIANS. 127 history, or indeed of any study, requi- ring much labour, is always apt to eva- porate in the moment of enjoyment. It is nearly impossible to transmit the result of our own labours into the minds of others, who have not qualified them- selves for their reception by the neces- sary degroe of previous research. Or, if they are understood, they can only furnish the reader with an author's opi- nions, of which he knows not the foun- dation, and that can never become active sources of knowledge, like those which he might obtain by his own exertions. After all, how small is the class of readers, who study history, with the expectation of acquiring virtue or expe- rience ! To those who are destitute of the habits and discipline of literature, history is little better than a splendid pantomime, where some of the spectators are delighted with the dexterity and bold- ness of the hero, others with the magni- ficence of the scenes, and the astonishing I 4 128 MENIPPEAN ESSAY &c. changes of the machinery; from such an entertainment, the majority carry away, perhaps, as many moral impres- sions, as they would receive from the study of Thucydides or Davila. ON THE ORIGIN of THE MODERN ART of FORTIFICATION. .IT /:0 (>N THE ORIGIN OF THE MODERN ART OF FORTIFICATION. It is generally agreed, among mili- tary writers, that the method of fortifying places with bastions w^s introduced into Italy^ about the beginning of the six- teenth century. But the author of this great change in the art of war has never been accurately traced. I have been induced, by Folard's reflections on this subject,* to make some enquiry into it, the result of which will perhaps surprize the reader. The first bastions which were seen in Europe, were constructed by the Turks, for the defence of Otranto, in Apulia, * Hist, de Poly be, torn, iii, pw^ &iSeq. , 132 ON THE ORIGIN OF THE which they occupied, from the time of their invasion, in 1480, to a hite period in the succeeding year.* They de- fended this place against the whole power of Italy, and only capitulated in conse- quence of the death of Mahomet If. After their departure, the Italian^ were surprized to find works of a new appear- ance; and GuiJlet-|' says, that their gene- ral, Trivulzio, recommended an imita- tion of them to the Christian engineers. I have unfortunately mislaid a reference to an Italian writer, who corrobbrates the fact. . To the Turks, tlien, we owe^'tliis 'ini-* provcment ; and it becomes a matter of curiosity, to enquire by \v'hat- means tliey ^' '''tj\ :; ' J ' . '''^- -^ *t);.) J JO life were led to its adoption. , ^ '''ti had'^ occurred to ^rrle*, maiiy years ago, that Tacitus had described the walls of Jerusalem, as constructed in some degree, on the modern princiDte of a * Folard, Muratoi, Annal. torn, xxiii. p. 168^. f Vje de Mahomet lu Liv. ii; p; 37 1j >H MODERN ART OF FdaXIFJCATION. 153 flanking defence; ibutilinc^ing that Folard ridiculed th0 idea, Ji had given it up, tm,!?pnie Qbservadons in the Memoirs of Prince Eugene, lately published, and an examination -of a passage, inisrquoted: by Folard, renewed ray first opinion'. ' Qui croirait*, says the prince, * que ' j'ai appris quelque chose des Turcs, et *_qurupis abrupta, et turreSj ubi mons ju- ** visset, in sexaginta pedes, inter devexa 'fifiira specie, ac prbotjl ititUdAtibuy-^ii **< res. Alia intus ma^Wia,- i-egi* cifOtfnljiJ^ '* jecta, conspicuoquc fastigio tufris,- A^^ ** toftia ill honorem M. Antotiiiab'HfcS'iN^ "appcUata."* '.'..;tr;i ,f .i.ioi ' Tlve only worcte in this' {iasisagi^, Wftith can admit of any dispute^ ai"^, ^^obliqui, ant iiitoTsnssinuatv," winch Folard trans- lates, by ** salien-t & re-enferirtg'i^gle^r"' and wb icli he d isci'e^di-ts} bieic^aase, he h^% ' Joseph us h vai given ^ 'a ' d rfterent aecOiVitt ' of the works.- But it is clear, t^af J6s^-* phus, after mentioning the - cthe^r waffej^ describes ^ha three towers, effected' ^j?^ Herod, on the old wall, rn a rninH^f coi^responding to that of Tacitiis; a^H^ that he omits to notice tho curvatures BookTi. 1 3(5 ; N THE ORIGIN OF THE conversed with officers who served under TitiTs-; and he has described the works with more appearance of military know- ledge than Josephus, who was only anxious to boast the magnificence of their structure. There is certainly no contra- diction between them. V Ammianus Marcellinus furnishes a most curious passage, which, if we may de- pend on it, shews that flanking defences had existed, long before this celebrated siege. ' In speaking of the campaign of Sapor, king of Persia, in Mesopotamia, he adds ; ** ViRTAM adoriri disposuit, munimen- " turn valde vetustum, ut sediiicatum a " Macedone credatur Alexandro, in ex- ** trcmo quideni Mesopotamiae situra, sed ** muris velut Simtosis circumdatum et " Conmtis, instructioneque varia inac^ "ccssum."* .>;infi4i ;! strongly suspect that; Fola'rd Had bcf! .\iy * Lib. xk. c; vi. ' "'" The instructio varia may have been analagous to the intricate Gateways of the Ea^, MODERN ART OF FORTIFICATION, 137 never examined this passage ; because he remarks on it, that the historian must have been mistaken ; lor, although the town was old, the walls were not. On the contrary, the pointed expressions of Ammianus lead us to suppose, that the genius of Alexander had anticipated this principle of defence, by many centuries. All this positiveness, on the part of Folard, arose from a misapprehension, owing to his ignorance of the ancient languages, and his proneness to accommodate every thing to the recent state of fortification. He could understand nothing but redents, by the words ' sinuosi, and cornuti,' but I conceive that they convey a different meaning. In CORONELLi's ISOLARIO, and in his description of the MOREA, we see con- cave flanks, which form segments of considerable circles in the curtins, instead of straight lines ; and these I apprehend to resemble the sinuosities mentioned both by Tacitus, and Ammianus. That VOL. II. K iS8 ON THE ORIGIN OF THE they were copied from more ancient buildings, which no longer exist, is highly probable. I refer the reader par- ticularly to the views of Lepanto and Ccrigo in Coronelli, for examples of this construction. The expression, ' coimu- tuSf used by Ammianus, is particularly descriptive of this kmd of work ; tliough it has l)een applied, by modern Latin writers on military affairs, to the horn- work. By attending to the curious work of Procopius, Utfi YirvTiunavy We are enabled to ascertain the date of several deviations from the ancient mode of fortification, and of approaches to the modern method. When the emperor Justinian adopted a defensive system, on the eastern frontier, by the construction or repair of fortresses, and by fortified lines, he bestowed par- ticular attention on the re-edification of DaRA, in Mesopotamia. As the place was threatened by the Barbarians, he diwrst not opeii it, fey demolishing the MODEflN* ART OF FORTIFICATION. ISy ancient ^alls ; he therefore surrounded them with an outer, lower wall, or vaumur, which ih more modern times, occupied the Berme, and became the Fausse-braye.* At the bottom of each of the towers, he constructed a square work; andMhus gaVe origin, at once, to bastloned towers, and to the square bastion ; of the latter, vestiges appear to have existed, even in the seventeenth century. -|- He introduced, also, the round-turrets in the middle of the towers, of which Conway castle affords exam- ples. He constructed^ on the level ground, where the enemy might easily approach, to the southward, an advanced ditch, in form of a half-moon, in front of the vaumur, arxl resting on the wall at its extremities. This ditch was lined par- tially by a lower wall,^ and was, in fact, * P. 30, 31. cap. i. lib. ii. t See Lotich. de Rebus Germanicis, T- i. View of Saxenhausen. K 2 140 ON THE ORIGIN OF THE an out-work, resembling very much the Fer-a*cheval, only perhaps of a larger size. I shall quote Procopius's words, as Mr. Gibbons has only mentioned it generally. Ta^pov oSv svauru jMwvoejJjj, typoir ts iai &a6oii "tKavui g^ouffav sti fjutxpu KaTopC^ai, sitarspov auniis TO TTpoTuxJo'lMi'ri to 'Tte^Of evU'^evy v^aroi jt*>jv Siapnui tlA'jr'kn7a(Ji.tvog, a&arov it Tcana'na^iy Toii woX/o40pKia (ppovpouai FufjuUoi th te 'ntpiBQ>^ xou '^po'Teix^a-fjLaroi t5 sTepis a^^ovTr>i gracili jaetat convitia vulgo, Et crebro solvit, lepidom caput, ora cachinno. 152 THE PUPPET-SHEW. When courtly lords and shining dames are seen Round beauteous Grisild' or St. George's Queen, His saucy laugh disturbs the solemn place. And the room echoes to his pert grimace. Or wilder still, his lawless flame invades The modest beauties of the varnish'd maids ; The varnish'd maids with disapproving hiss. And coy reluctance, shun the saucy kiss. But undisturb'd the meaner forms advance. And ply their little limbs in busy dance. And oft with glitt'ring paste and tinsel gay. The wooden race their birth-day robes display ; In marshaird order trip the ladies bright. And lordlings sparkle on the vulgar sight. While the small people, joining in the press. Revive the dream of Pygmy-happiness : duanquam res agitur solenni seria pompa, SperrTit sollicitum intractabilis ille tuniultum, Et risu importunus adest, atque omnia turbat. Nee raro invadit molles, pictamque protervo Ore petit Nympham, invitoque dat oscula ligno. Sed comitum vulgus diversis membra fatigant Ludis, et vario lascivit mobile saltu. ' Sa>pe etiam gemmis rutila, ct spectabilis auro, Lignea gens prodit, nitidisque superbit in ostris. THE PUPPET-SHEW. 153 As if the warlike dwarfs, relax'd from toils, la knightly glories rich, and feather'd spoils. Had quench'd in gentle ease, and soothing strains. The airy terrors of the hostile cranes. So when the stars their middle station keep. The sportive Faries o'er the greensward sweep ; In merry round they print the narrow ring. And wave the yielding grass with nimble spring, Whence kindly juices the glad soil bedew. And the rich circle shoots with darker hue. But sudden clouds the happy scene o'ercast. Wars, horrid wars resound their dreadful blast. Nam, quoties festam celebrat sub imagine lucem, Ordine composito Nympharum incedit honestum Agraen, et exigui proceres, parvique Quirites. Pygmaeos credas positis mitescere bellis, Jamque infensa Gruum temnentes prselia, tutos Indulgeve jocis, tenerisque vacare choreis. Tales, cum medio labuntur sidera caelo, Parvi subsiliunt Lemures, populusque pusillus Festivos, rediens sua per vestigia, gyros Ducit, et angustum crebro pede pulsitat orbem. Mane patent gressus ; hinc succos terra feraces Concipit, in multam pubentia gramina surgunt Luxurjem, tenerisque virescit circulus herbis. Vol. II. L 154 THE PUPPET-SHEW. Their hasty arras the wooden warriors* seize. And desperate combat interrupts tbeir eaae< So short our pleasures : thus our bliss withstood \ So dash'd with care is ev'ry mortal goodt Now front to front the dazzling lines appear. Raise the thin sword, or point the taper spear ; With martial port they meditate the blow. And levell'd-muskets threat' the daring foe. Hark ! the smart crackers spit their fiery breath. Hiss, bounce* and thunder in the field of death. Thro* er'ry arch the mingled bursts resound j Thick-falling warriors strew th' unhappy ground. Sometimes the sad detail of civil rage Lifts to sublimer aim the pygmy-tage. From Bunker's Hill now flaming rosin darts. Now dreadful Howe appals the Yankey -hearts j Here Burgoyne, forc'd to yield, forbid to fly, A well-dissembkd Puppet ! seems to sigh. At non tranquillas nulla abdunt nubila luces, Saepe gravi surgunt bella, horrida bella tumultu. Arma ciet trucyl^nta cohors, placidaraque quietem Dirumpunt pugnae ; usque adeo insincera volupta^ Omnibus, et mistae castig-ant gaudia curae. Jam gladii, tubulique ingesto sujphure foeti. THE PUPPET-SHEW. 15^ A little Calp^ shoots resistless fires. On BarnwelFs gibbet Andre's form expires : Or Rodney's thunder sends the Gallic foe Thro* canvas billows, to the depths below. Inventive Foote produc'd, his wit to skreen, Socratic puppets, and th' ambiguous scene ; Hence chasten'd love and humble faith inspire The patten'd beauty, and the generous 'Squire. Great lord of irony ! he svvay'd the age. The peerless Plato of the puppet-stage. Next, meagre France, who could afford no more Substantial forms to grace a rival shore, Sarcastic,^ taught in airy space to flit Her Eastern shades, with empty sounds of wit. Lo I half-conceal'd the dext'rous puppet playg. Beneath the artful veil's indulgent blaze ; In flippant French the restless figures jar. And foreign sounds perplex the list'ning tar. But soon th' imperfect forms disgust the eye, Protensaeque hastae, fulgentiaque arma, minaeque Telorum ingentes subeunt j dant claustra fragorenj Horrendum, ruptoe stridente bituraine chartas Confusos reddunt crepitus, et sibila miscent. Sternitur omne solum pereuntibus ; undique csesae Apparent tnrmee, civilis crimina belli, L2 }!fi THE PUPPET. SHEW. Darkling they come and unregretted fly : So when the wand' ring chief the ghosts survey 'd. That " squeak and gibber " in th' infernal shade^ His wonder past, he view'd with careless ease Forms impotent alike to hurt or please- Then high the gen'rous emulation ran, Th' ennobled puppet tow'ring into man. Fair in the Strand the pleasing stage was found. With lovely art, and happy graces crown'd. There Shakespeare's wit in wooden gestures shone. There J p n's, blest, to please the eye alone ! With rapid step a nobler band succeeds. The Fantoccini, known by deathless deeds; Scarce man himself their promptness can surpass To trim the taper, or present the glass. Behold Noverre the mimic art restore I Medea raves and Phaedra weeps no more. Here sense and shew decide their long dispute. For man turns puppet, and the stage is mute. Ungraceful Hamlets, aukvvard Romeo's fly : Let Mother Goose* more worthy themes supply. * This passage might very well have been written at the time when the poem is dated ; for the entertain- ment of Sefifna and Azor was taken from the story of Beauty and the Beast, in Mother Goose's Tales. The stage is now farther indebted to that learned author. THE PUPPET-SHEW. 137 On the vast stage, o'er many an acre spread. Be lowing herds and numerous squadrons led ; While Blue Beard fierce the fatal key demands. Or Puss IN Boots acquires the Ogre's lands; Or fair Red Riding-Hood, in luckless hour, A helpless victim falls to fraud and pow'r. Proceed, great days I till poetry expire. Till Congreve pall us, and till Shakespeare tire j " Till ev'ry tongue its useless art let fall. And moping Silence roost in Rufus' hall ; Till nimble preachers foot the moral dance. Till cap'ring envoys check the pow'r of France, And full St. Stephen's see, with mute surprise. The Opposition sink, and Premier rise. But oh ! what God inspires my boding mind To paint the glimm'ring prospect yet behind ! 'I see in gesture ev'ry wish exprest. Each art, each science quit the lighten'd breast : No wand'ring eyes the distant heav'ns explore. On two legs tott'ring, man descends to four- Then, great Monboddo, proves thy system true ; Again in caves shall herd the naked crew j Again the happy savages shall trail (A long-lost gift !) the graceful length of tail : In that blest moment, by indulgent heav'n. Thy wish, Rousseau and Swift's revenge are given. Now, whence the puppet's various functions came The muse shall teach, and make insruction fame. L 3 168 THE PUPPET-SHEW. The workmen fir?t the Jurnb'rjng Jogs inform. And chipj evnd torture into human form ; Next string the limbs, and clasp t^ joints with art. Add piece to piece, and answ'ring part to part ; Then wheeling puUies join, and flowing cords. Whose secret influence guides the wooden lords. And now the nice machine completed stands. And bears the skilful print of master-hands ; Seems in its new creation to rejoice, Th' imparted motions and the grafted voice ; As justly turning to the ruling springs As votes to ministers, or hearts to kings* Ntmc tamen uude genus ducat, c^nas dextr^ la- tentes Suppeditet vires, quem poscat turba moventem, Expediam. Truncos opifex et inutile lignum Cogit in hnmanas species, et robore natam Progeniem telo effbrmat, nexuque tenaci - Crura ligat pedibus, humerisque accommodat armos, Et membris membra aptat, et artubus insuit artus. Tunc habiles addit trochleas, quibus arte pusillum Versat onus, moHque manu famulatus inerti Sufficit occultos motus, vocemque ministrat. THE PUPPET-SHEW. 159 Hence, learn'd Casaux,* thy earnest thoughts began To trace the jointed frame of polish'd man. In some low booth, that on the rampart lies. To catch in heedless throngs Parisian flies. Where the wise Hebrew shone in tinsel-light. Or Europe's princes charm'd thy tender sight, Thy soul divin'd, for such the will of fate. The shifting puppet-shew of pow*r and state. Poets themselves in puppet-motions sport. And steal sweet voices from th' Aonian court ; Transporting sounds ! that pass, with struggling pain. Our narrow organs in a ruder strain. See, classic Addison with ease combines Virgilian accents in his sportive lines : But mine, weak offspring of a languid age. Love the low roof, and haunt the humble stage Congenial themes the mimic muse requires. And on mean altars lights her scantj fires. His structa auxiliis jam machina tota peritos Ostendit sulcos, duri et vestigia ferri : Hinc salit, atque agili se sublevat incita motu, Vocesque emittit tenues, et non sua verba. * Aaihor of tlie Mechanism of Socieli/' L4 // OF GENIUS. From hauBtdd spring and dale, Edg'd with poplar pale. The parting Genius is with sighing sent- Milton. OF GENIUS. XT is useful to observe the effect of our early reading, in perpetuating false impressions even among those who boast an emancipation from all prejudices of education. Hume's classical knowledge was too strong for his scepticism ; for in one of his essays he supposes it probable, that such a scheme as that of the ancient mythology may have been carried into eftect, at some period, in some part of the solar system. Cambens makes the Virgin Mary intercede with Jupiter, when the Portuguese are in danger, and seems as much attached to one religion as to the other. Vossius, of whom Charles II. used to say, that he believed every thing but the Bible, was another 164. OF GENIUS. instance of the ease with which men suffer the grossest impostures to gain upon them, when they are unhappily recommended by elegance and wit.* I am apt to imagine, that the extrava- gancies of the ancient poets, engraved on our minds by the rod, and too par- tially entertained by our relish of the more sober beauties of those authors, have sometimes deceived us in our esti- mate of human faculties, and have sup- ported, unperceived, something of lite- rary superstition and metaphysical mys- ticism, even to the present time. When we speak of a man who has made any considerable discovery in science of art, who has painted a good picture, written a fine poem, or a very good novel, we * It is said, that when Vossius, who was a canoa of Windsor, lay on his death-bed, the Dean came to persuade him to receive the sacrament. Vossius rejected the proposal with indignity : after some altercation, the Dean gravely said ; " Mr. Vossius, if you will not receive it for the love of God, take it, at least for the honour of the chapter," OF "GENIUS, 105 call him a man of genius, without under- standing our own meaning. Books have been written, indeed, to explain the word genius, but speakers and readers have continued to doubt ; for authors have agreed in the same error, of con- sidering genius as a distinct power of the mind, while in reality, it originally- denoted something totally independent of it. I know not whether weakness or pride contributed more to those delusions, which appropriated a divinity to preside over the most usual, and the least digni- fied of our natural functions, but if the ancients supposed themselves to be super- naturally assisted on such occasions, it is not wonderful that they should lay claim to superior protection, in the bright and enviable moments of literary success. They believed, that every man w^as under the direction of one of the smaller deities, or aerial daemons ; a sort of valets to the I(f6 OF GENIUS. superior gods,* and according to Seneca, tutors of men ; like the usual arrange- ment in families of distinction upon earth. Sepone in praesentia quae qui- busdam placent: unicuique nostrum pae- dagogum dari Deum, non quidem ordi- nariiim, sed hunc inferioris notae, ex eorum numero quos Ovidius ait de plebe deos \ TJiese obsequious inhabitants of the air, who at their leisure-hours chased swallows and crows, obtained the general name of genius. And some eminent men, in their atrabilious moments, have fancied that they discerned the presence of such attendants. It would appear, * Apuleius de Deo Socratis. qaaedam di- vinae mediae potestates, inter summum aethera et infimas terras, *^******* inter terricolas caelicolasque vec- tores, hinc precum, inde donorum **** Horum enim' niunus ct opera atque cura est, ut Annibali somnia orbitaiein oculi comminarentnr, Flaminio extispicia periculum cladis praedicant, &c t ISenec, Epist. ex. OF GENIUS. 167 however, that Socraties and the Pfatonists, confined the influence of the genius chiefly to presages, and directions in religious ceremonies. The poets thought themselves of sufficient importance to deseiTe a separate establishment, and made their genii stationary on Parna5sus But after the introduction of Christianity, when the learned embarrassed themselves, by retaining the Platonic doctrine of daemons, to grace their systems of magic, the genius was not only considered as a supernatm*al. attendant, but as a being jx)ssessed of most extensive knowledge, which IjiC was dkposed to communicate on certain considerations. Marinus, a biographer of Ptoclus, has asserted that IRuhnus, a man of consequence, and no^ doubt a very able statesman, observed ojj day the head of Proclus surrounded with rays (such as we denominate a glory) while he was teaching ; " ut di- vino signo," says Brucker, " qualis in hoc corpore daemon laterct, omnes intel- 16S OF GENIUS. ligerent.* Non puduit itaque Marlnum, vitoe hujus Compilatorem, divinse inspi- rationis (eeiag smTrvoiai) participem eum fu- isse, asserere, et vultum oculosque ac ora divinos radios sparslsse mentiri." Proclus aftected to believe, that he was assisted in the composition of his works by the goddess Cybele. Hence the visionary hopes of forming a commerce with an- gelic existences, which dissipated the hours of many ardent scholars. The Paracelsian and Rosicrucian follies, and the most sincere part of Alchemy, as well, perhaps, as some late sects, derive their orign from this mixed and doubtful source. This wild conjunction of mythology and magic formed a spell, not easily to be broken. An undefined veneration was attached to the term genius, which became more powerful as it was less understood. The influence of classical * Hist. Critic. Philosoph. torn, ii. p. 332. OF GENIUS. 169 imagery, and its perpetual recurrence to inspiration, supported an impression, which, Hke the terror of nocturnal illu- sions, though disclaimed in public, and no longer existing as a system, still haunts the hours of silence and solitude. Poets, at all times the most incorrigible of the literary tribes, still dream of impulse, and mistake their own idleness for the frown of Minerva. MorhofF, one of those singular characters, who acquire the belief of common errors, by exten- sive reading and profound meditation, was so struck with this impression, that he wrote a whole chapter, de eo, qiiod in diciplinis divinum est. He has indeed faintly rejected the syncretistic follies of the former age, but he perhaps allowed inspiration rather too largely, when he granted it to an Italian irnprovisatore, and to Valentine Greatrak.* The concluding lines of Buchannan's address to Mary Queen of Scots, which Polyhistor. Literar. lib. i. cap. xii. 13.2$. VOL. II. M 170 OF GENIUS. have been reckoned so obscure, may be easily explained by this view of the for- mer acceptation of genius. Non tamen aasus eram male natum exponere faetgm, Ne mihi displiceant quae placuere tibi. Nam quod ab ingeHio dorpini sperare nequibant, pebebunt genio forsitan ilia tuo^ The feebleness of the poet's verses (as his modesty led him to speak), was to be protected by the genius of th6 Queen, which, by the courtesy of the age, was deemed of superior rank and power to the genius of a private person. I cannot suspect so excellent a poet as Buchannan, of any intentional play on the words ingenium and genius. In the Ajax Mastigophorus, Sophocles ascribes the hero's execrations to his evil genius, who alone, he says, could have invented them. Lord Verulam had many strafige fan- cies, about the genius attendant on great OF GENIUS. 171 minds;. he sublimed his notions on this subject witli Van Helmont's doctrine of transmitted spirits, which referred all eminence in military and civil affairs, as well as in wit, to the force of perspira- tion. The genii were sometimes supposed to be the spirits of departed men, espe- cially those which were thought to revisit the places of their former residence, or the scenes of their destruction : hence that passage in Milton ; Henceforth thou art the genius of the shore. In thy large recompense, and shalt be good To all that wander in the perilous flood.* With all this contagious mysticism floating from brain to brain, it is not to be wondered, that poets should be pre- sumptuous and idle, or that readers should be slavishly timid. The votary of poetical frenzy fancied himself enter* * Lycidas. M 2 172 OF GENIUS. ing the temple of Apollo, and invested with the sacred characters of a priest and a prophet, when he " poured forth his unprenieditated verse," while the multi- tude, combining the most distant ana- logies, believed that in the writings of eminent poets, they discovered predic- tions, in which the author himself had been unconsciously prompted by Jiiis genius. -fr? <-ft It was not enough to admire Virgil as a great Poet; his votaries were deter- mined to venerate him as a prophet, and almost as a god. While altars were erected, and incense was burnt to him, by some of the first restorers of letters, the credulous explored their destinies in his pages, by the aid of false transla- tion, and distorted inference. It is well known, that Charles I. was greatly dis- concerted and distressed, on finding the Sortes Virgiliana? unfavourable, at the beginning of the civil war. With the liberties of application allowed in these OF GENIUS. 17^ cases, it is easy to find a prophecy of any event, after it has taken place. If, for instance, a prediction is wanted of the calamities occasioned by the Prag- matic Sanction, it is ready in Juvenal; Iiide cadunt partes, ex foedere Pragmaticorum. In this manner, the celebrated prophecies of Nostradamus have acquired the pro- tection, even of the learned. JViuri^jjiiff dwells with great satisfaction, on the number of important events predicted by this man, who wrote his rhapsodies in 1555. One of his rhimes was supposed to be accomplished sixteen years after- wards, by the massacre of St. Bartho- lomew ; En grande cite, qui n' a pain qu' a demy. Encore un couple St- Barthelemy. But unluckily, in another quatrain, he foretold that in 1707, the Turks would conquer the northern parts of Europe, not foreseeing Prince Eugene. M 3 L74. OF.^GENIUS. The couplet I have quoted, might, with the usual latitude of appropriating pre- dictions, be applied to later occurrences, as some degree of similarity in the course of human affairs must often recur, when miracles are out of the question. But to shew how easily the rank of prophet may be thus obtained, I shall quote a passage from Camemrius's Horae Sub- cwtste, my edition oi which was pub- hshed one hundred and thirty-six years ago, which bears more minute characters o^' resemblance to recent events, than any thing I have met with ; " Ne ex- empla tam long^ petamus quid obsecro non perpessi sunt homines miseri nuper in carnificinis Gallicis, praesertim Lute- tiana ? Quid enim vulgus, veluti ludos ageret, quibus humanus sanguis effun- deretur, sasvitiae, crudelitatis, libidinis, turpitudinis, ignominias, tam in eos qui neci destinati erant, quam in alios qui pro innoxiis habebantur, et quidam non sdum erga vivos, sed erga mortuos etiam. OF .ENJUS. . IT. 5 non habita ratione aetatis, dignitatis, con- ditionis, aut sexus, omisit ? We can more easily pardon this tribute to those works, which are the pride aiid delight of all ages, when We consider tlie signs and conditions annexed to the character of a prophet, during the pre- valence of the heathen mythology, and tacitly acknowledged by those who pay attention to the ravings of Brothers, or the Cheshire boy, among oirrselves. When frenzy and imposture usurp the regard, which is only due to the oracles of truth, it becomes interesting to know the source of a delusiony capable of existing among any class of men, in ages which boast tlie possession of true religion. The state of mind in which men were an- ciently supposed to acquire a knowledge of futurity, was formed by dreaming, drunkenness, madness, epilepsy, or the approach of death. In one word, deli- rium was the characteristic of a prophet: we cannot be at a loss for that of his admirers. M 4 176 OF GENIUS. Tlie Platonic philosophers of the ec- lectic class, thought that predictions were communicated during sleep, or immedi- ately on awaking, by low voices.* This is now a very prevalent vulgar error, though undoubtedly of Platonic descent. In the ecstasy, which may be considered as a morbid state, a number of objects is obtruded on the prophet's senses, from which he can seldom form any con- jecture. Such was the celebrated vision of Arise Evans,-|- in which he saw the restoration and succession of monarchy, in this country delineated in the palm of his hand, without being able to deduce more from it, than that after four reigns there would be a change of blood. | In * Brucker, torn. ii. ,p. 444. ,f f Apprndix to the fifst voiume of Jortin's ^Remarks on Ecclesiastical History. + I have in my possession a small' tract by this mari^ written in 105(), to prove that Charles I'l. was the Messiah, destined, tp restore the Jews,' in which is r prediction still more circumstantial and remarkable ; " Cut I say, he that lives five years to an end, shall see King Charles Stuart flourish on his throne, to the OF GENIUS. 177 all these operations the genius acts ; the prophet is passive, and generally igno^ rant. It appears not improbable, that an in- toxicating potion was given to the Pythia, by way of ensuring the strength of her ecstasy.* There seems to have been some traditionary knowledge handed down on this subject, for in Dr. Harsnett, Archbishop of York's Discovery of Po- pish Impostures, the girls who were exorcised had delirium excited, by nause- ous potions and fumigations. Delirious exclamations, in certain dis- amazement of all the world, for God will bring him in without bloodshed." Light to the Jews, p. 5. But mark the juggling of this fellow. This egregious pro- phecy, though said to be printed in ] 656 on the second title-page, was in reality, only published in 1664, four years after the event. In this instance, therefore, he was clearly guilty of imposture. Prophecies, at that time, were party-matters* Evans prophesied for the Royalists ; Lilly, a more successful knave, for the republicans, * The Pythia always drank, before she placed her- self on the Tripod. \7$ Of OENIU8. eases, hare beeo received as mdicatioos erf future events; hence k has become necessary for those who aspired to tb ebaractwar of prophet?, to make the m-ukitude beUeve them to be asfiiicted witii those diseases.* Lucian's Alexander learnt the art of frothing at the mouthy ind the mob, as Lucian tells iJs, held h'ls froth to be sacred. Epileptic comn pladnts have certainly been familiar to men of great talents : Caesar, Peter I* and several others of distinguished merit, were subject to epilepsy. But it cannot be sapposed that they were improved by the disease. It is an unhappy circumstance, that pbilosopliy has sometimes strengthened,, instead of correcting vulgar prejudices. Even philosophers, of the mystic class, have thought the imputation of madness an addition to their feme. " Porphyrins *** se secreto multa mysterio ex divino afllatu interdum disseruisse, ideoque pro fueente babitum fuisse J ACTAT-" Bruck^r- Hist. Grit. Philos. torn- ii. p. 2+5. OF GENIUS. i79 Plato's followers, by their description* of the i4(r/a(7j-, constituted madness a sign of inspiration. To the misfortune of mankind, tl:ie ravings of lunatics have often been more regarded than the argu- ments of wise men ; but such a pre- ference ought not to have been sanc- tioned by philosophers. This must surely have been one of the exoteric doctrines^ calculated only for the porters and fish* Women of Athens. No doubt, the same causes which, in a strong degree, pro- duce madness^ may in a lower encrease the natural powei's of the mind. Cardan, and a melancholy list of illustrious names, appear^ in some parts of their writings, as mad as the author of Hurlothrumbo, while in others they discover an extra- ordinary acuteness and sagacity. The popular prophets of this country, were all really or affectedly mad. They are now litde read or respected ; but they * Brucker, Hiet. Grit. Philos. t. ii. p. 445. n^ OF GENIUS. were formerly powerful engines of fac- tion, and became the objects of repeated acts of the legislature. Les reves, as Voltaire says' of Plato, donnoient dors de grande reputation. The courteous demons of antiquity have vanished, but they have left a kind of magic splendor over the heads of men of talents, which the herd of metaphy- sicians has beheld with awe. If a person of unassisted good sense were to enquire, what constitutes a man of genius, he would discover it to be a vigorous and successful exertion of the mind, on some particular subject, or a general alacrity and facility of intellectual labour. In a word, that genius consists in the power of doing best, what many endeavour to do well. In the best treatises on this subject, tfiere has been much of a fallacious mcfhod, which imposes equally on the author and the reader ; I mean, a prolix description of facts, substituted for a OF GENIUS. 181 theory of their causes. Undoubtedly this kind of writing would be useful, if it were appreciated at its just value ; but its facility, and its pretensions create pre- judices against the more slow and diffi- cult method of induction. Moliere has characterized this false philosophy by a single stroke : " Quare facit opium dor- mire ? Quia est in eo virtus dormitiva." Behold the fruit of many a huge and thorny metaphysical quarto ! DIALOGUE IN THE SHADES. M\J DIALOGUE IN THE SHADES. LUCIAN NEODIDACTUS. Lucian, I OU appear very melancholy, for a philosopher of the new stoical sect. Do you regret the glory, which you doubtless enjoyed in the other world ? Or do you dislike the grim equality of the stalking skeletons which surround you ? We cannot boast, indeed, of our gaiety, but we have tranquillity, which to a philosopher is much better. We enjoy our exemption from the pertur- bations of life, as the wearied mariner reposes in the still gloom, succeedmg a mighty tempest. Vol. II. N 186 DIALOGUE IN Neodidactus. Enjoy yourselves as you will ; I am tormented by anxiety and doubt. By professing the doctrines of the new and pure philosophy ifpdtt earth, mi f cha- racter was ruined, and I was abandoned by society. Here, 1 find no one disposed to investigate my principles, excepting yourself, who, I suppose, intend to laugh at me, according to your custom. I had learned, indeed, from our master, that " the wise man is sadsfied with no- thing:" that "he is not satisfied with his own attainments, or even with his principles and opinions:*'* but I feel that mine have produced the extremity of wrefchedri^ss. Liician, You must then be cxtreBaely wise, oa your own principles. But be not de- jected. The wprldfj i^erceiyej jpt^t^r^e * Godwin'? Enquiry concerning t*olitical Justice yol. i. p. 208. 2nd edition. i ' - 4* II ..10/ THE SHADESU 1*7 its old charactei) : mankind have seldona troubled their benefactors with expres- sions of gratitude. ' (_ . Neodidactus, ^ I beg that you may never again men- tion so disagreeable a word to me. Gra- titude, according to the new philosophy, " kno part either of justice or virtue;"* nay we hodd it to be actually a vice,-jr when it results merely from our sense of benefits conferred on us. Xjxcian, By the Graces ! this is very strange philosophy. In teaching men to be ungrateful, fio you not render thei]:^ wipked ? ^^'\ vY.if'v>r^,j s^[,,,,,.4 v-.,;^,^^^ , r. ucjiTj Neodidactus., We do not embarrass ourselves much with the distinctions of virtue and vice ; * Enqjiity cgiiperouigg Political JiUsfice,. vol. i, p. 130. t Ibid. p. 266. N 2 188 DIALOGUE IN the "motives and the tendencies of human actions are so complex, and their results so uncertain, that we find it difficult to assign them places under those desig- nations. We even doubt whether there be any such thing as vice. Lucian. You puzzle me : let me beg that you would explain yourself a little more clearly; unless your philosophy enjoins you to be obscure. Neodidacfus, I will explain myself most gladly. Know then, that *' vice, as it is com- monly understood, is, so far as regards the motive, purely negative,"* and that " actions in the highest degree injurious to the public have often proceeded from motives uncommonly conscienti- ous. The most determined political assassins, Clement, Ravaillac, Damiens, Enquiry, vol. i. p. 153, 154. THE SHADES. 189 and Gerard, seem to have been deeply penetrated with anxiety for the eternal welfare of mankind." Our sublime contemplations lead us also to believe, that " benevolence probably had its part in hghting the fires of Smithfield, and pointing the daggers of St. Bartholo- mew."* ;;}., Lucian. If I rightly understand you, murder and persecution are justifiable on the principles of the new philosophy. Neodidactus. Our only rule is the promotion of general good, by strict, impartial justice; whatever inconveniences may arise to individuals from this system, we disregard them, and as we allow no merit to actions which respect the good of indi- viduals only, so we perceive no demerit in those which benefit the public, though * Enquiry, vol. i. p. 153, 154. N 3 190 DIALOGUE IN they may considerably injure individuals* Justice, eternal justice must prexaiL. . q Lucian. .^ But how shall this over-ruling joastice be ascertained, or limited ? It every man is to decide for himself and the world, confusion, and universal ruin must ensue. Neodidactus. You speak, O Lucian, of man in his present state ; but we regard him in the state of perfection, to which he may attain by instruction and experience. We hope the time will arrive, when neither government nor l*ws will be necessary to the existence of society ; for morality is nothing but the calcula- tion of the probable advantages, or dis' advantages of our actions. Lucian. By what means, then, shall those be corrected, who ma,y err in their calcula- >E SHA8. 191 tions respecting tlie public good, aud pteimal justice ? Few- I suppose, you cau feirdly expect that all meu will reason with equal acuteness, in the most en- lightened periods. Neodidactus, By persuasion; the only* allowable method of suppressing human errors. The establishment of positive laws is an insult to tlie clignity of iToan ; -j- so gready do we detest their influence, that we consider an hoijest lawyer as a worse meniber of society than a dishonest one,J^ bl^cause the man of integrity palliates^ ^nd in some degree masks tlie -ill effect^ of law. Lucian, This part of your philosophy is not so i^w as you imag'mc. All punishments, * Enquiry, vol. i. p. 180 t -Vol. ii. p. 399, 400. $ Vol. ii, p. 399, N 4 1!2 DIALOGUE IN then, would be banished from your re- public, excepting the long discourses, to which you would oblige criminals to listen. Neodidactus. Punishment is nothing else than force,* and he who suffers it must be debased, and insensible of the difference between right and wrong, if he does not consider it as unjust.-f- " I hare deeply reflected, suppose, upon the nature of virtue, and am convinced that a certain proceeding is incumbent on me. But the hangman, supported by an act of parliament, assures me that I am mistaken." J Can any thing be more atrocious? more injurious to our sublime speculations ? Lucian, Doubtless, philosophers of your sect must sometimes be thus disagreeably in- Vol. i. p. 181. f Enquiiy, vol. i. p. 181, X lb. p. 178, 179. THE SHADES. 193 terrupted, in their progress to perfection. But in a society without laws, without the fear of punishment for offences, without the distinctions of virtue and vice, and destitute of the ties of gratitude and friendship, I feel it difficult to con- ceive, how the transactions necessary to existence can be carried on. You must depend much on family attachments, and on the inviolable regard which indi- viduals should pay to their promises. Neodidactus. Family attachments we regard as silly, and even criminal, when they tend to bias our opinions ; and as to promises, our master has written a long chapter, to prove that they are great evils, and are only to be observed, when we find it convenient. Lucian, Did it never occur to you, that this system might produce more evil than J 94 m4A.0QVB IN good in the world ? and that yoi* have Jj)een ijecomuaending a plan, which in- Mead of perfecting man, and improving society, must be destructive of every fslimable quality in his breast, and must 4five him again into savage sohtude ? r Neodidactus. We cannot always answer for events. ** Every thing is connected in the uni- verse. If any man asserted that, if Alexander had not bathed himself in the river Cydnus, Shakespeare would never have written, it would be impossible to affirm that his assertion was untrue."* Such is our doctrine. Lucmn, Your logic is equally admirable with your morality ; this species of sophism has been exploded with contempt by good authors ; you now revive it as one * Enquiry, vol. i. p, 1^1. THE SHADEEO 195 of youT discoveries, and yoa may per- haps raise it to the rank of those which merit indignatioia* -/y[ ,; ii Neodidactus. Be not too hasty, facetious Greek; you miscalculate, like all those who err, the quantity of energy necessary for this occasion. Our master has taken many of the things which yoii disapprove, from, the writings pf^yo^ir friend S;ivift. Lucian. Yes, I am. aware tliat a great part of your,, new philosophy is stolen from Oulliver's Travels, and that the republic of horses was the archetype of your perfect men.* But come, that we may |rt ifi good humour, I will treat you with^a senUment, which I derive from a dear friend of Swift. " Wc are for a * See the Voyage toUbe Hooynhms. 196 DIALOGUE IN n just partition of the world, for every man hath a right to enjoy life. We retrench the superfluities of mankind. The world is avaricious, and we hate avarice. A covetous fellow, like a jack- daw, steals what he was never made to enjoy, for the sake of hiding it. These are the robbers of mankind, for money was made for the free-hearted and ge- nerous: and where is the injury of taking from another, what he has not the heart to make use of ? '* What is your opinion of this ? Neodidactus, It is admirably expressed, in the true spirit of our philosophy, and of impartial justice. Indeed our master has said something very like it.* Pray, in what divine work is this great truth to be found ? * Enquiry, vol. j. p. 2^8, and vol. ii. p. 444, 445. THE SHADES. 197 Lucian* In the Beggar's Opera; it expresses the sentiments of a gang of Highway- men, an institution which approaches nearer to your idea of perfect society, than any other with which I am ac- quainted. THE BIBLIOMANIA, AN EPISTLE, TO RICHARD HEBER, Esq, Hie, inqujs. Veto quisquam faxit Oletum. Pinge duos Angues : Pera, Sat. 1, I. 108. a^\K\io^ THE BIBLIOMANIA, AN EPISTLF,, TO RICHARD HEBER, Esq, VV H4-T wild dfisires, what restless torments seize The hapless man, who feels the book-disease. If niggard Fortune cramp his gen'rous mind. And Prudence quench the Sparjc by heaven assign'd ! With wistful glance bis aching eyes behold The Princeps-copy, clad in blue and gold, Where the tall Book-case, with partition thin. Displays, yet guards the tempting charms within : So great Facardin view'd, as sages* tell. Fair Crystalline immur'd in lucid cell. Not thus the few, by happier fortune grac'd. And blest, like you, with talents, wealth and taste. Who gather nobly, with judicious hand. The Muse's treasures from each letter'd strand. For you the Monk illum'd his pictur'd page. For you the press defies the Spoils of age ; Faustus for you infernal tortures bore. For you FUiAS|iysf starvM on Adria's shore. * Sages. Count Hamilton, in the Sluatre Facardins, and Mr. M. Lewis, in his Tales of Romance. f Seethe Opukntia Sordida, in his Colloquies, where he coHjplains o feelingly of the spar* VfOiian di|J. Vol. II. o i 202 THE BIBLIOMANIA, The Folio-Aldus loads your happy Shelves, And dapper Elzevirs, like fairy elves. Shew their light forms amidst the well-gilt Twelves In slender type the GiOMTOs shine. And bold BoDONi stamps his Roman line. For you the Louvre opes its regal doors. And either Didot lends his brilliant stores : With faultless types, and costly sculpture^s bright/ /^' Ibarra's Quixote charms your ravish'd sight: Laborde in splendid tablets shall explain Thy beauties, glorious, tho' unhappy Spain ! O, hallowed name, the theme of future years, Embalm'd in Patriot-blood, and England's tears. Be thine fresh honours from the tuneful tongue. By Isis' streams which mourning Zion sung ! But devious oft* from ev'ry classic Muse, The keen Collector meaner paths will choose : And first the Margin's breadth his soul employs. Pure, snowy, broad, the type of nobler joys. In vain might Homer roll the tide of song. Or Horace smile, or Tully charm the throng; If crost by Pallas' ire, the trenchant blade Or too oblique, or near, the edge invade. The Bibliomane exclaims, with haggard eye. No Margin ! ' turns in haste, and scorns to buy. He turns where Pybus rears his Atlas-head, Or Madoc's mass conceals its veins of lead. The glossy lines in polish'd order stand. While the vast margin spreads on either band. Like Russian wastes, that edge the frozen deep. AN EPISTLE. 203 Chill with pale glare, and lull to mortal sleep.* Or English books, neglected and forgot. Excite his wish in many a dusty lot : ' Whatever trash Midwinter gave to day. Or Harper's yh,^xiQi}ng sons, in paper grey. At ev'ry auqtipi^ bent on fresh supplies. He cons his Catalogue with anxious eyes : Wherever the slim Italics mark the page. Curious and rare his ardent mind engage. Unlike the Swans, in Tuscan Song display 'd. He hovers eager o'er Oblivion's Shade, To snatch obscurest names from endless night. And give Cokain or Fletcher f back to light. In red morocco drest he loves to boast The bloody murder, or the yelling ghost ; Or dismal ballads, sung to crouds of old. Now cheaply bought for thrice their weight in gold. Yet to th' unhonour'd dead be Satire just ; * It may be said that Quintilian recommends mar- gins ; but it is with a view to their being occasionally occupied : Debet vacare etiam locus, in quo notentur quae scribentibus solent extra ordinem, id est ex aiiis quam qui sunt in manibus loci, occurrere. Irrumpunt enim optimi nonnunquam Sensus, quos neque inserere oportet, neque differre tutum est. 9 Instit. Lib. X. C. 3. He was therefore no Margin-man, in the modern Sense. t Fletcher. A translator of Martial. A very bad Poet, but exceedingly scarce. 2, fiO-t THE BIBLIOMANIA. Some flow'ra* "smell sweet, and blossom in their dust." 'Tis thus ev'n Shirlev boasts a golden line. And Lovelace strikes, by fits, a note divine. Th' unequal gleams like midnight-lightnings play. And deepen'd gloom succeeds, in placti'of day. But human bliss still meets some envious storm ; . He droops to view his Paynter's mangled form : Presumptuous grief, while pensive Taste repines O'er the frail relics of her Attic Shrines ! O for that power, for whicii magicians vye. To look through earth, and secret hoards descry 1 I'd spurn such gems as Marinelf beheld. And all the wealth Aladdin's cavern held, , Might I divine in what mysterious gloom The rolls of sacred bards have found their tomb : Beneath what mould'ring tower, or waste champain. Is hid Menander, sweetest of the train ; Where rests Antimachus' forgotten lyre, ^Vhere gentle Sappho's still seductive fire; * Only the actions of the just Smell sweet, and blossom in the dust. Shirley. Perhaps Shirley had in view this passage of Persius: Nunc non e tumulo, fortunataque favilla Nascentur Violas ? Sat. 1. 1,37. f Faerie Queene. AN EPISTLE. 205 Or he,* whom chief the laughing Muses own, ^ Yet skiird with softest accents to bemoan S- Sweet Philomel,t in strains so like her own.$ j The menial train has prov'dl the Scourge of wit, * Aristophanes. t See his exquisite hymn to the Nightingale, in his OpviOeg. X Brunck supposes these charming verses to hare been intended, as a parody on a passage in the Helena of Euripides. If Aristophanes designed his hymn as a burlesque, the effect of it is totally lost on a modern reader. He appears to have rivalled Euripides, in this instance, in his own style ; and if, on other occasions, he has severely scrutinized the defects* he has here seized the peculiar beauties of that writer. It is surprising that Mr. Fox should have entertained an opinion, expressed in some of his letters, which have been lately published, that the song of the Night- ingale was considered* by the Greek Poets, as cheerful, Euripides, in the passage alluded to says of the Nightingale, ff Tav aiohfarav opviBa JM^o3bV, 'anh'va daiipvoBcra-av : And Aristophanes characterizes her song thus ; E?f Xi^o/i*i 3i/30jf (lehtaiv : * * Opwfef, 1. 683. O 3 206 THE BIBLIOMANIA, Ev'n Omar burnt less Science than the spit. Earthquakes and wars remit their deadly rage. But ev'ry feast demands some fated page. Ye Towers of Julius,* ye alone remain Of all the piles that saw our nation's stain, When Harry's sway opprest the groaning realm. And Lust and Rapine seiz'd the wav'ring helm. Then ruffian-hands defaced the sacred fanes Their saintly statues, and their storied panes ; Then from the chest, with ancient art embost. The Penman's pious scrolls were rudely tost ; Then richest manuscripts, profusely spread. The brawny Churl's devouring Oven fed : And thence Collectors date the heav'nly ire. That wrapt Augusta'^s domes in sheets of fire.f To which we may add this decisive passage from the CEdipus Coloneus of Sophocles j ^afii^Hcra i*aMr art^on. I. 671. From a curious letter, on the study of Greek poetry, published in Trotter's Memoirs of Mr. Fox, we learn that he had " never read a word of Aristophanes." There are, indeed, too many repulsive passages in that dramatist, but he does not merit neglect- * Gray. t The fire of London, AN EPISTLE. 207 Taste, tho' misled may yet some purpose gain. But Fashion guides a *b9ok-compelling train. Once, far apart from Learning's moping crew,' The travell'd beau display'd his red-heel'd shoe. Till Oefoud rose, and told of rhiming Peers, Repeating nohle words to polish'd ears ; f Taught the gay croud to prize a flutt'inng name. In trifling toil'd, nor * blush'd to find it fame/ The letter'd fop now takes a larger scope. With classic furniture, design'd by Hope. Now warm'd by Oufobd, and by Granger school'd. In Paper, books, superbly gilt and tool'd. He pastes, from injur'd volumes snipt away. His English Heads, in chronicled array. Torn from their destin'd page, (unworthy meed Of knightly counsel, and heroic deed) Not Faithorne's stroke, nor Field's own types can save t The gallant Verbs, and one-eyed Ogle brave. * Cloud-compelling Jove. Pope's Iliad. ' f - gaudent praenomine molles Auriculae. Juvenal. X The gallant Veres, and one-eyed Ogle. Three fine headi;, for the sake of which, the beautiful and interest- ing Commentaries of Sir Francis Vere have been muti- lated by Collectors of English portraits. 4 208 THE BttBlifl>5VrANlA, Indignant readers seek the image flcdj '-' . -^i-uV And curse the busy fool, who Wants a head. Proudly he shews, with many a smile elatA^' tU>i.(J The scrambling subjects of the private plate ; ' >J JiiT While Time their actions and tlieir nmnes bfertftifcjJ^ ' i' Yhey grin for ever in the guarded leav&s. -^ Like Poets, born, in vairt Collectors strivfe ... i' To cross their Fate, and iearh the art to thf Ivtti -*i^ aJ Like Cacus, bent to tame their struggling wilFj '' The tyrant-passion drags them backward still : Ev'n I, debarred of feast, and studibhs hoo^,' ' '- Confess, mid' anxious toil, its lurking pow'rsi *' How pure the joy, when first my hJMids unfold The small, rare volume, black with tai-nish'd gold ! The Eye skims restless, like the roving bee. O'er flot\ ers of ivit, or song, or repartee, Whilfe srt'Cfet as Springs, iew-babbling from thie stone. Glides through the breast some pleasing theme un- known. Now dipt in * Rossi's terse and classic style. His harmless tales awake a transient smile. Now Bouchet's motley stores my thoughts arrest. With wond'rous reading, and with learned jest. Bouchetf whose tomes a grateful line demand, * Generally known by the name of Janus Nicius Erythraeus. The alluaion is tb his Pinacothec&. f Les Serees de Guillaume Bouchet, a book of un- common rarity. I possess a handsome copy, by the Kindness of Colonel Stanley. AN EPISTLE. 209 The valued gift of StAtfLEY's liberal hand* Now sadly pleased, through faded Rome I Stray, And mix regtett with gentle Du BfittAlf j* ' "'''^*^' Or turn, with keen delight, the curiotls page. Where hardy f Pisquin brAV^s the t*ontiff's ngt. As ift *thc fragrant garden blooms the t(Mi' ' ' So mjr J rich matioscript irt crimson glo^4's. 'Sweet/ cries the Sage, I) ' to view the infant-dress, * The first rode efforts of the dawning press ! ' But sweeter ftir to me these bright designs. Ere Carton's blocks imprest theirclumsy lines. '* But oh ! my Muse,*' ivhat madness would engage Lt9 ttegrtt^, by Joschim du Bel lay, contain i most amusing and instructire Accoimt of Rome, in the 16th Century. f Pasquillorum Tomi duo. I Les diets Moraux des Philo&ophes, an illuminated manuscript ; dated 1473. See Dibdin's Typographic cal Antiquities, for an account of this work. ([ Res saiie delectationis plelia est, jucundo hoc aspectu pascere oculos, et prima ilia aureee artis con- templari experimenta. Ipsa typorum ruditas, ipsa ilia atra crassaque literarum fades, belle tangit settsos, nobisque vivis veluti coloribus gradus istos delineat", per quos paulatim a teneris unguiculis, et ipsis cre- pundiis in masculam illam, qua nu^lc floret,' aetsttem ars t'xcusoria cretit. Sthelhorn, Amasnitateis Literariae. Tv i. p. 5. Ad^iserj. 210 THE BIBLIOMANIA, To sing the miniatures, and velluiu-page r iy,f>)r,'f ^ni Steal from some happy bard a spark offir?, yi ,0, yrv/ Whose never-check'd descriptions never tir^.! ,, j,.,^ " Pictures a score this curious work adorn, . , j^'^, *' Of men esteem'd in learning's early morn. ^f " On vellum stands inscrib'd each sage's name* *' Their portraits rich with gold and minium flame ; " Some walk in gardens trim, or books peruse, *' Or white-rob'd bards address a gothic muse, " No brisk, deep-bosom'd, Attic maiden she, j " But starch and prim, and scarcely fair to^ee. r V Square beards, and long-ear'd caps, and furs abound, " And decent robes depending sweep the ground ; ?' Nay> strange extreme of fashion's sov'reign rule; V Some hold what belles have term' da Ridicule, ** (The lovely triflers think not, as they trip, ..i *' Their bag was fashion'd from the Cynic's scrip') " Then happy seats appear in beauteous dyes, * The softest verdure, and the clearest skies ; ** Stately and fair the porch and airy hall, ** And costly tapestry clothes the naked wall. " St. Gregory hard at study there I spy, " His glory and tiara strike the eye ; *' His books well-bound, with many a gilded spot, ** A clever reading-desk has Gregory got ! *' Had the tenth Leo thus his leisure spent, ** We yet had pray'd in Latin, and kept Lent. *' But greater bliss the charming picture fills, * When golden sun-beams smile on verdant hills, *' Or soft retreats in flow'ry vales are made. longing view, ^ r enter'd too, V 'withdrew. j AN EPISTLE. 211 " Whero the young forest rears its tender shade. ** Then at safe distance pinnacles are seen, *' And glitt'ring towers surmount the swelling green ; ** Gay belts of war ! the city's specious pride, " Which sullen cares, and quiv'ring anguish hide. " For near the lofty fane or opening square, *' The sad blind alley teems with hopeless care. ** Dire, in those ancient times, the wretch's plight, ** Ere the dim pane transmitted scanty light : ** When ill-join'd shutters barr'd the longing view, *' And where light flow'd, the winter " As shiv'ring hands the wooden leaf ^ " Their's was the shapeless bolt, the dunghill-floor, " And blacken'd thatch the humble caves peep'd o'er: " Without, the putrid kennel choak'd the way, ** And all was filth, disgust, and deep dismay. " No ballads then bedeck'd the lab'rer's cot, " Nor Francis Moore foreboded cold or hot : " Whose cuts grotesque, and artless rhymes supply, " (What cv'n the poor require) the poor man's library ** More solid good the mystic church with-held ; *' Their eyes the sacred volume ne'er beheld, ** Save when at church the reader turn'd with care, " The glitt'ring leaves, and spoke the foreign prayer: * With doubtful hope the pauper's bosom beat, *' He left, unedlfied> his gloomy seat. " Or when the Freer* on some high festal day v *' Would relics rare> and miracles display; *' And prate, as tell the sly Italian drolls " Of Gabriel's feather, or St. Lawrence' coals. 212 THE BIBLIOMANIA, *' In sin the \^Tetch might lire* in sin might die ; ** Give money mone\', was the preacher's cry. ** Then light arose-^-the darkling cot was blest, ** When Tindal's volume came* a hoarded guest. . '* Fierce* whisker'd guards that volume sought in vain, " Enjoy'd by stealth, and hid with anxious pain* *' While all around was penury and gloom, " It shew'd the boundless bliss bey6nd the tomb j " Freed from the venal priest, the feudal rod, ' It led the sufferer's weary steps to God ; " And when his painful course on earth was rtrd, * This, his sole wealth* descended to his son. Now* when no tyrant-statutes cramp belief, * When Smithfield's only martyrs are its beef, *' Amidst the crouds whom rarer books entice, " Still Tindal's Bible is a gem of price. *' True, the blest owner now no longer fears " The bishop's summons thund'ring in his ears, *< No more he turns the leaves with trembling hope, " Or dreads lest Satan come* in guise of Pope; * On that stout shelf, where ev'n Polemics sleep, * He shews its hoards, inclosed in lasting sheep. " There long untouch'd may Tindal's labours lyi " For book collectors read not what they buy." Can I forget my Cass as? *'fav'rite theme ! Where truth exceeds Romances boldest dream. In those rude wilds, by wand'rers scarcely trod. Before the pencil* Fancy drops her rod j * Voyage PittoreBtjue de V latrie et de la Dalmatic. AN EPISTLE. 21 S O'craw'd, she sees transcendant nature reign, And trembling copies what she dar'd not feign. But. scarcer books had kept their station here, Had warning Cynthius touched my infant-ear. And shew'd the grave collector's toil employ'd. To gain the works my childish sport destroy'd. *Parismus then had shone in decent pride. And bold St. George* with Sabra at his siderf And Reynard's wiles, t by learned clerks poartray'd. Dame Partlet wrong'd, and Isgrim sore be^vray'd : And eke that code.fj of wit the peerless store. Where peruk'd beaux their hooded dames adore. These once were mine, till, reckless of their scope, I left their charms for Milton and for Pope. And who can say, what books, matur'd by age, Mav tempt, in future days, the reader's rage ? How, flush'd with joy, the Bibliomane may shew His Carrs uncut and Cottles, fair in row ; May point, with conscious pride, to env'ying throngs His Holcroft's dramas, and his Dimond's scmgs ? So winter-apples, by the prudent Dame Are hoarded late, and wither into fame. So Antiquarians pierce the Barrow's soil, * History of Parismus and Parismenos, once a child's book, now exceedingly scarce and dear, t History of the Seven Champions. X History of Reynard the Fox, very scarce and dear. il Academy of Compliments* very curious and scarce. 214 THE BIBLIOMANIA, And loads of crockery pay their learned toil ; The wond'rous fragments rich museums grace* And ev*ry Pipkin rises up a Vase. With deep concern, the curious bid me tell> Why no Black-Letter dignifies my cell : No Caxton ? Pynson ? in defence I plead One simple fact ; I only buy to r^ad. I leave to those whom headstrong fashion rules Dame Julian Berners> and the Ship of Fools ; The cheapest page of witi or genuine sense Outweighs the uncut copy's wild expence. What coxcomb would avow th' absurd excess* To choose his friends, not for their parts, but dress ? Yet the choice Bard becomes some ancient stains ; I love, in Gothic type, my Chauceu's strains; And Spencer's dulcet song as deeply charms* When his light folip boasts Eliza's arms. Nay doubly fair the Aldine pages seem, Whercj broadly gilt, illumin'd letters gleam. For stupid prose my fancy never throbs. In spite of vellum-leaves, or silver knobs. But D n*s strains should tell the sad reverse. When Business calls, invet'rate foe to verse ! Tell how * the Demon claps his iron hands,' * Waves his lank locks, and scours along the lands.' Though wintry blasts, or summer's fire I go, To scenes of danger, and to sights of woe. Ev'n when to Margate ev'ry cockney roves. And brainsick poets long for shelt'ring groves. Whose lofty shades exclude the noontide glow. AN EPISTLE. 215 While Zephyrs breathe, and waters trill below,* Me rigid Fate averts, by tasks like these. From heav'niy musings, and from letter'd ease. Such wholesome checks the better Genius senda^ From dire rehearsals to protect our friends : Else when the social rites our joys renew. The stufF'd Portfolio would alarm your view, Whence volleying rhimes your patience would over- come. And, spite of kindness, drive you early home. So when the traveller's hasty footsteps glide Near smoaking lava, on Vesuvio's side, Hoarse-mult'ring thunders from the depths proceed* And spouting fires incite his eager speed. Appall'd he flies, while rattling show'rs invade. Invoking ev'ry Saint for instant aid : Breathless, amaz'd, he seeks the distMit shore. And vows to tempt the dang'rous gulph no more. * Errare per lucos, amoenae, Quos et aquffi subeunt et aurae. Ho^AT. 5h.^7/ f A NORTHERN PROSPECT; AN ODE. Tfaon shaft not laugh in this leaf, Muse- Do June's 5th Satire, VOL. IL The following ode contains ideas* suggested by the extraordinary prospect from a rock, in the neighbour- hood of Alnwick Castle. That view comprehends a series of antiquities, deeply interesting, not only by their. magnificence, but by their relation to history; and frequently recollected by the author, amidst the exertions of active life as the favourite scenes of his youth. Some readers may, perhaps, suppose that the thoughts are not sufficiently developed. But I have always considered it as essential to the ode, that it should indicate impressions, without dwelling upon them. The torrent of ideas, which characterizes this species of poetry, only presents an object with force, to hurry it more rapidly beyond the view of th spectator. A NORTHERN PROSPECT. W. HEN blazing noon illumes the plain. And tips each spiry dome with quiv'ring fire. Where Ratcheugh's pillar'd rocks aspire Swift let my steps the airy height attain. Around the various prospect thrown, Th' expanded sea's majestic zone In many a floating tint reflects the beam ; Dark stretch the wood's high-shelt'ring arms. The village spreads her simple charms. And shines afar the silver-winding stream. Bold on the eye advance those tow*rs. Where Percy boasts his princely bowers. Crown the slope-hill and awe the subject-valej In faded glory Warkworth's turrets rise. And point to yonder cell* the raptur'd eyes. Where figur'd rocks record the Hermit's tale. Swift o'er Howick's^ attic hall. And shelter'd Craster's sylvan wall, * The Hermitage. P2 220 A NORTHERN PROSPECT. The view excursive flies, Wliere Dunstonburgh * o'erhangs the roaring tide, And lifts his shattered arms, and mourns his ruin'd pride. Trembling o*er the rocky ground. His genius sends a hollovs' sound, . Like the vex*d sea, when thund'ritig winds are fled ; *' Relentless hands, which these proud works de- fac'd ! Mistaken avarice, with such costly waste ' '^ To rear the hardy peasant^s simple shed ! ' '"' See Alnwick tower in Gothic pride ; The marsh exhale, the heath recede. In graceful wave the ductile river glide; 'Tis liberal power's creative deed. And far-conspicuous on the wat'ry waste, Bambroagh's huge rock the massy structures crown: On the black vale when rolling vapours spread. The turrets gleam high o'er the dnving blast ; Sharp f rear'd their drooping head. Beneath old Cheviot's frown. See Ford's;}: white line the verdant slope adpfi^j^ . j But when shall rise my vernal morji ? * A romantic fortress, nearly demolished to enlarge"' a farm-house, which lies at its feet. t Dr. Sharp, late Archdeacon of Northumberland. X Ford Castle, repair'd by Lord Delaval. A NORTHERN PROSPECT. 321 These fiagnieat* of Lancastrian pride, x :* ,: oSJ These broken halls, these juttii>gnioun(is''^^hfown. Rough galesj as thro' the mould'ring arch they haste. Learn, soften'd, to bemoan; While deaf'ning waves, with aggregated roar. Surmount the wall they vainly lash'd before." Dim -shewn in yonder leafy glade, Sequester'd Huln her fair enclosure rears. Sweet hope of peaceful years. Well might'st thou haunt that cloisterM shade \ Let those proud trophies* tell Where hostile monarchs fought and fell. These walls beleag'ring round ; Unhurt by war's tumultuous rage. The tranquil monk illum'd the pagq, Safe in thy consecrated ground. Amid yon' happy woods The careless rustic seeks his game. Or in the murm'ring floods Ensnares the fry, by loneness tame ; Nor heeds where creeping ivy's trail O'er knightly trophies draws its veil; Nor, as the crumbling turrets fade, * Monuments in the pleasure-grounds of the Duke of Northumberland, which commemorate the captivity of one king of Scotland, and the death of another, while they were besieging the castle of Alnwick. 2SQ A NORTHERN PROSPECT. Remarks the abbey's shorlen'd shade ; Unmov'd alike by piety and fame. Ye who catch at glory's flame, ^^ To yon' majestic walls repair ; Know Tyson, t Vescy.f or Fitzharding* there Spread their rich banners in the flutt'ring gale; Learn to contemn, from their neglected tale. The wild ambition of a name. f The Saxon, and first Norman Lords of Alnwick. * Founder of Warkworth Castle. FINIS. J. AND J. HADDOCK, PRINTERS, WARRINGTON. University of California SOUTHERN REGIONAL LIBRARY FACILITY 405 Hilgard Avenue, Los Angeles, CA 90024-1388 Return this material to the library from which It was borrowed. tt OCT 181' ItHub rEC'DVRL It law UC SOUTHERN REGIONAL LIBRARY FACILITY AA 000 069 964 5 ^g '^^^nk Yr ou! 'i m 1 ,: Vnr ^m^mB-BBSBSm.