To-wnley 
 High Life Below Stairs
 
 THE LIBRARY 
 
 OF 
 
 THE UNIVERSITY 
 OF CALIFORNIA 
 
 LOS ANGELES 
 
 FREDERIC THOMAS BLANCHARD 
 ENDOWMENT FUND
 
 HIGH LIFE 
 BELOW STAIRS. 
 
 A 
 
 FARCE 
 
 F 
 
 TWO ACTS. 
 
 As it is performed at the 
 
 THEATRE-ROYAL in Drury-Lane. 
 
 O tmitatores., Servum pecus ! HOR. 
 
 k * # 
 V 
 
 LONDON: 
 
 Printed for J. NEWEERY, at the Bible and Sun in St. Parts 
 Church- Yard; R. BAILYE, at Litchfield ;< ; J. LEAKE 
 and W. FREDERICK, at Bath; B. COLLINS, at Sa- 
 lijbury, and S. STABLER at Fort. 
 M D c c L i x. 
 
 [Price One Shilling.]
 
 Dramatis Perfonae. 
 
 LOVEL, ayoung Weft-Indian 0/7 ., ~ 
 
 Fortune, ^ {Mr. OBRIEN. 
 
 FREEMAN, bis Friend, 
 
 Mr. PACKER. 
 
 PHILIP, -> ( 
 
 -Mr. YATES. 
 
 TOM, 
 
 , 
 
 Mr. MOZEEN. 
 
 COACHMAN, 
 
 
 Mr. CLOUGH. 
 
 KINGSTON, a 
 
 Servants to J 
 
 Mr. MOODY. 
 
 Black, 
 
 LOVEL. 
 
 
 KITTY, 
 
 1 
 
 Mrs. CLIVE. 
 
 COOK, 
 
 1 Mrs. BRADSHAW. 
 
 CLQ-L,aBlack,J ^Mrs. SMITH. 
 
 DUKE'S Ser-~] 
 
 r 
 
 v&rif. 
 
 
 Mr. PALMER. 
 
 Sir HARRY'S 
 
 
 
 
 Servant, 
 
 
 Mr. KING. 
 
 Lady BAB'S > Vlfitors. 4 
 
 
 Maid, \ 
 
 Mifs HIPPISLEY: 
 
 Lady CHAR- 
 
 
 LOTTE'S 
 
 Mrs. BEN NET. 
 
 Maid* J 
 
 
 ROBERT, Servant to Freeman, 
 
 Mr. ACKMAN. 
 
 FlDLER, 
 
 Mr. ATKINS. 
 
 SCENE, 
 
 London. 
 
 ADVERTISEMENT. 
 
 IT was a real Defire to do good, amongft a very 
 large and ufeful Body- of People, that gave 
 Rife to this little Piece. The Author thought the 
 Stage, where the Bad might be difgrac'd, and the 
 Good rewarded, the moil ready and effectual Me- 
 thod for this Purpofe : And, as he never wrote 
 before in the Dramatic Way, and was unwilling to 
 be known, he was happy in recommending the Per- 
 formance, by the Afllltance of a Friend, to the Care 
 and Judgment of Mr. GAR RICK. 
 Nov. 5, 1759.
 
 HIGH LIFE 
 BELOW STAIRS. 
 
 A C T I. 
 
 SCENE, An Apartment in Freeman'; Houfe. 
 FREEMAN and LOVEL, entering. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Country Boy ! ha, ha, ha. How long 
 A has this Scheme been in your Head ? 
 
 LOVEL. 
 
 Some Time I am now convinc'd of 
 what you have often been hinting to me, that I 
 am confoundedly cheated by my Servants. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Oh ! are you fatisfied at laft, Mr. Love! ? I al- 
 ways told you, that there is not a worfe Set of Ser- 
 vants in the Parifh of St. James^^ than in your 
 Kitchen. 
 
 LOVEL. 
 
 'Tis with fome Difficulty I believe it now, Mr. 
 
 Freeman-, tho', I muft own, my Expences often 
 
 A 2 make 
 
 892070
 
 4 H I G H L I F E 
 
 make me flare Philip, I arn fure, Is an honeft 
 Fellow , and I will fwear for my Blacks If there 
 is a Rogue among my polks, it is that furly Dog 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 You are miftaken in every one. Philip is an hy- 
 pocritical Rafcal : Tom has a good deal of furly Ho- 
 nefty about him : and for your Blacks, they are as 
 bad as your Whites. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Prithee, Freeman, how came -you to be fo well 
 acquainted with my People ? None of theWenches 
 are handfome enough to move the Affections of a 
 middle-aged Gentleman as you are. Ha, ha, ha. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 You are a young Man, Mr. Lovel, and take a 
 Pride in a Number of idle, unnecefiary Servants, 
 who are the Plague and Reproach of this King- 
 dom. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Charles, You are an old-famion'd Fellow. Ser- 
 vants a Plague and Reproach ! ha, ha, ha. I 
 would have forty more, if my Houfe would hold 
 them. Why, Man, in Jamaica, before I was ten 
 Years old, I had an hundred Blacks kiffing my Feet 
 every Day. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 You Gentry of the Weftern Ifles are high mettled 
 ones, and love Pomp and Parade I have feen it 
 delight your Soul, when the People in the Street 
 have flared at your Equipage-, efpecially if they 
 whifpered loud enough to be heard, " That is 
 " 'Squire Level, the great Wef Indian r Ha, ha, ha. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 I fhould be very forry if we were as fplenetic as 
 you Northern Iflanders, who are devoured with Me- 
 lancholy and Fog. Ha, ha, ha. No, Sir, we are 
 
 Children
 
 BEL O W STAIRS. 5 
 
 Children of the Sun, and are born to diffufe the 
 bounteous Favours which our noble Parent is pleafed 
 to bellow on us. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 I wifli you had more of your noble Parent's Re- 
 gularity, and lefs of his Fire. As it is, you con- 
 fume fo faft, that not one in twenty of you live to 
 be fifty Years old. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 But in that fifty we live two hundred, my Dear ; 
 mark that. But to Bufmefs I arn reiblv'd upon 
 my Frolick. I will know whether my Servants are 
 Kogues or not. If they are, I'll baftinado theRafcals -, 
 if not, I think I ought to pay for my Impertinence. 
 -^-Pray tell me ; is not your Robert acquainted with 
 my People ? Perhaps he may give a little Light 
 into the thing. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 To tell you the Truth, Mr. Lovel, your Servants 
 are fo abandoned, that I have forbid him your 
 Houfe However, if you have a Mind to afk him 
 #ny Queftion, he mall be forth coming, 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Let us have him. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 You mall; but it is an hundred to one if you get 
 any thing out of him ; for, though he is a very 
 honeft Fellow, yet he is fo much of a Servant, that 
 he'll never tell any thing to the Difadvantage of 
 
 another Who waits? [Enter Servant.} Send 
 
 Robert to me [Exit Seriant.~\ And what was 
 
 it determined you upon this Project at lad ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 This Letter. It is an anonymous one, and fo 
 ought not to be regarded ; but it has fomething 
 honeil in it, and put me upon fatisfying my Cu- 
 riofity. Read it. [Gives the Letter. 
 
 FREEMAN.
 
 6 H I G H L I F E 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 , I fliould know fomething of this Hand [Reads. 
 
 'To Peregrine Lovel, Eft. 
 " Pleafe your Honour, 
 
 <c I take the Liberty to acquaint your Honour, 
 " that you are fadly cheated by your Servants. 
 *' Your Honour will find it as I fay. 1 am not 
 " willing to be known, whereof if I am, it may 
 " bring one into Trouble. 
 
 " So no more, from your Honour's 
 
 " Servant to command. 3 * 
 Odd and honeft ! Well and now what are the 
 
 Steps you intend to take ? [Returns the Letter. 
 
 LOVEL. 
 
 I fhall immediately apply to my Friend the Ma- 
 nager for a Difguife Under the Form of a gawky 
 Country Boy, I will be an Eye - witnefs of my 
 Servants Behaviour you muft affift me, Mr. 
 Freeman, 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 As how, Mr. Lovel. 
 
 LOVEL. 
 
 My Plan is this I gave it out, that I was go- 
 ing to my Burrough in Devon/hire^ and yefterday fet 
 out with a Servant in great Form, and lay at Ba- 
 
 Jingftcke. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Well? 
 
 LOVEL. 
 
 I order'd the Fellow to make the beft of his Way 
 down into the Country, and told him that I would 
 follow him -, inftead of that, I turn'd back, and 
 
 am jult come to Town : Ecce Signum ! [Points 
 
 to his Boots. 
 FREEMAN. 
 It is now one o'Clock. 
 
 LOVEL. 
 
 This very Afternoon I mall pay my People a 
 vifit. 
 
 FREEMAN.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 7 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 How will you get in ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 When I am properly habited, you mall get me 
 introduced to Philip as one of your Tenant's Sons, 
 who wants to be made a good Servant of. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 They will certainly difcover you. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Never fear, I'll be fo countrify'd that yon mall 
 not know me. As they are thoroughly perfuaded 
 I arrrmany miles off, they'll be more eafily im- 
 pofed on. Ten to one but they begin to celebrate 
 my Departure with a drinking Bout, if they are 
 
 what you defcribe them. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Shall you be able to play your Part ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 I am furprized, Mr. Freeman^ that you, who have 
 known me from my Infancy, mould not remem- 
 ber my Abilities in that Way. But you old Fel- 
 lows have fhort Memories. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 What mould I remember ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 How I played "Daniel in the Confcious Lovers at 
 School, and afterwards arrived at the diftinguimed 
 
 Character of the mighty Mr. Scrub. 
 
 [Mimicking. 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Ha, ha, ha! That is very well. Enough. 
 Here is Robert. 
 
 Enter ROBERT. 
 Your Honour order'd me to wait on you. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 I did, Robert Robert ? 
 
 ROBERT.
 
 8 HIGHLIFE 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Come here You know, Robert, I have a good 
 
 Opinion of your Integrity. 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 I have always endeavour'd that your Honour 
 mould. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Pray have not you fome Acquaintance among 
 Mr. Lovel's People ? 
 
 ROBERT. 
 A little', pleafe your Honour. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 How do thjey behave ? We have nobody but 
 Friends you may fpeak out. 
 I, O V E L. 
 Aye, Robert, fpeak out. 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 I hope your Honours will not infift on my faying 
 any Thing in an Affair of this Kind. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Oh, but we do infift If you know any Thing. 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 Sir, I am but a Servant myfelf, and it would not 
 become me to fpeak ill of a Brother Servant. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Pfha! This is falfe Honefty fpeak out. 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 Don't oblige me, good Sir. Confider, Sir, a 
 Servant's Bread depends upon his Carackter. 
 L O V E L. 
 
 But if a Servant ufes me ill 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 Alas ! Sir, what is one Man's Poifon is another 
 Man's Meat. 
 
 FREEMAN.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 9 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 You fee how they trim for one another. 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 Service, Sir, is no Inheritance. A Servant that 
 is not approved in one Place, may give Satisfac- 
 tion in another. Every Body muft live, your 
 
 Honour. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Roberti I like your Heartinefs, as well as your 
 Caution ; but in my Cafe, it is necefTary that I 
 fhould know the Truth. 
 
 ROBERT. 
 The Truths Sir, is not to be fpoken at all Times, 
 
 it may bring one into Trouble, whereof if . 
 
 FREEMAN. (Mufmg.) 
 
 " Whereof if " Pray, Mr. Level, let me fee 
 that Letter again [Lovtl gives the Letter. ~\ Aye 
 it muft be fo Robert ! 
 
 ROBERT. 
 Sir? 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Do you know any Thing of this Letter ? 
 
 ROBERT. 
 Letter, your Honour ? 
 
 FREEMAN.! 
 Yes, Letter. 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 I have feen the Hand before. 
 L O V E L. 
 He blufhes. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 I afk you, if you were concerned in writing this 
 Letter. You never told me a Lie yet, and I ex- 
 pect the Truth from you now. 
 
 ROBERT. 
 Pray your Honour, don't afk me. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Did you write it ? anfwer me. 
 
 B ROBERT,
 
 io H I G H L I F E 
 
 ROBERT. 
 I cannot deny it. [Bowing. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 What induced you to it ? 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 I will tell Truth. I have feen fuch Wafte and 
 Extravagance, and Riot, and Drunkennefs in your 
 Kitchen, Sir, that, as my Matter's Friend, I could 
 not help difcovering it to you. 
 L O V E L. 
 Go on. 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 I am forry to fay it to your Honour , but your 
 Honour is not only impofed on, but laughed at by 
 all your Servants , especially by Philip, who is a 
 
 very bad Man. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Philip? An ungrateful Dog! Well? 
 
 ROBERT. 
 
 I could not prefume to fpeak to your Honour, 
 and therefore I refolved, though but a poor Scribe, 
 to write your Honour a Letter. 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Robert, I am greatly indebted to you. Here 
 
 [ Offers Money. 
 ROBERT. 
 
 On any other Account than this I fhould be 
 proud to receive your Honour's Bounty, but now 
 I beg to be cxculed [Refufes the Money, 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Thou haft a noble Heart, Robert, and I'll not 
 forget you. Freeman, he mull be in the Secret. 
 
 Wait your Matter's Orders. 
 
 ROBERT. 
 I will, your Honour. [Exif, 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Well, Sir, are you convinced now ? 
 
 LOVEL.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. n 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Convinced ? yes -, and I'll be among the Scoun- 
 drels before Night. You or Robert muft contrive 
 fome Way or other to get me introdu . 'd to Philip, 
 as one of your Cottager's Boys out of Eflex. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Ha, ha, ha ! you'll make a fine Figure. 
 
 L O V E L 
 
 They mall make a fine Figure. It muft be 
 done this Afternoon , walk with me acrofs the Park, 
 and I'll tell you the whole. My Name {hall be 
 Jemmy, i And I am come to be a Gentleman's 
 Servant and will do my bed, and hope to get a 
 good Carackter. [Mimicking. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 But what will you do if you find them Rafcals ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Difcover myfelf, and blow them all to the De- 
 vil. Come along. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Ha, ha, ha ! Bravo Jemmy Bravo, ha, 
 ha ! [Exeunt. 
 
 SCENE, tte Park. 
 
 DUKE's Servant. 
 
 What Wretches are ordinary Servants that go 
 on in the fame vulgar Track ev'ry Day! Eating, 
 working, and fleeping! But we, who have the 
 Honour to ferve the Nobility, are of another Spe- 
 cies. We are above the common Forms, have 
 Servants to wait upon us, and are as lazy and luxu- 
 rious as our Matters. Ha! My dear Sir 
 
 Harry ! 
 
 (Enter Sir HARRY'J Servant.) 
 How have you done thefe thoufand Years ? 
 
 B 2 Sir
 
 12 H I G H L I F E 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 My Lord Duke ! your Grace's mod obedknt 
 Servant. 
 
 DUKE. 
 Well, Baronet, and where have you been ? ; 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 At Newmarket, my Lord We have had dev'lifh 
 fine Sport. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 And a good Appearance I hear. Pox take it, 
 I mould have been there, but our old Duchefs 
 died, and we were obliged to keep Houfe, for the 
 Decency of the Thing. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 I pick'd up fifteen Pieces. 
 DUKE. 
 Pfha ! a Trifle ! 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 The Vifcount's People have been bloodily taken 
 
 in this Meeting. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Credit me, Baronet, they know nothing of the 
 Turf. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 I afTure yon, my Lord, they loft every Match ; 
 for Crab was beat hollow, Carekfs threw his Rider, 
 and Mifs Slammerkin had the Diftemper. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Ha, ha, ha ! I'm glad on't. Tafte this Snuff, 
 Sir Harry. [Offers his Box. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 'Tis good Rappee. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Right Strafl'urg, I allure you, and of my own 
 importing. 
 
 Sir HARRY, 
 Aye? 
 
 DUKE.
 
 BE. LOW STAIRS. 13 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 The City People adulterate it fo confoundedly, 
 that I always import my own Snuff. I wifh my 
 Lord would do the fame -, but he is fo indolent. 
 When did you fee the Girls ? I faw Lady Bab this 
 Morning ; but, 'fore Gad, whether it be Love or 
 Reading, me looked as pale as a Penitent. 
 Sir H A R R Y. 
 
 I havejuft had this Card from LoveFs, People 
 (Reads.) " Philip and Mrs. Kitty prefent their 
 " Compliments to Sir Barry ^ and defire the Ho- 
 " nour of his Company this Evening, to be 'of a 
 " fmart Party, and to eat a Bit of Supper." 
 DUKE. 
 
 I have the fame Invitation Their Matter, it 
 feems, is gone to his Borough. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 You'll be with us, my Lord ? Philip's a 
 
 Blood. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 A Buck of the fir ft Head ; I'll tell you a fecret, 
 he's going to be married. 
 
 Sii H A -R R Y. 
 To whom ? 
 
 DUKE. 
 To Kitty. 
 
 Sir H A R R Y. 
 No! 
 
 DUKE. 
 Yes he is ; and I intend to cuckold him. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Then we may depend upon your Grace for cer- 
 tain. Ha, ha, ha! 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 If our Houfe breaks up in a tolerable Time, I'll 
 be with you. Have You any Thing for us ? 
 
 3 Sir
 
 I 4 HIGH LIFE 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Yes, a little Bit of Poetry I muft be at the 
 Cocoa-tree myfelf till Eight. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Heigho ! I am quite out of Spirits I had a 
 damn'd Debauch laft Night, Baronet. Lord 
 Francis^ Bob the Bifhop, and I tipt off four Bottles 
 of Burgundy a-piece Ha ! there are two fine Girls 
 coming, Faith Lady Bab aye, and Lady Char- 
 
 fate. ['Takes out bis Glafs. 
 
 . Sir H A R R Y. 
 We'll not join them. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Oh, yes Bab is a fine Wench, notwithfland- 
 ing her Complexion ; though I Ihould be glad me 
 would keep her Teeth cleaner Your Engli/b Wo- 
 men are damn'd negligent about their Teeth. 
 
 How is your Charlotte in that Particular ? 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 My Charlotte ? 
 
 DUKE. 
 Aye, the World fays, you are to have her. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 I own I did keep her Company ; but we are off, 
 
 my Lord. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 How fo ? 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 Between you and me, fhe has a plaguy thick 
 
 Pair of Legs. 
 
 DUKE. 
 Oh, damn it that's infufferable. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Befides, fhe is a Fool, and mifs'd her Opportu- 
 nity with the old Countefs. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 I am afraid, Baronet, you love Money. Rot 
 it, I never fave a Shilling Indeed I am fure of a 
 
 Place
 
 BELOW STAIRS 15 
 
 Place in the Excife Lady Charlotte is to be of the 
 Party to Night ; how do you manage that ? 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Why, we do meet at a third Place, are very 
 civil, and look queer, and laugh, and abufe one 
 another, and all that. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Alamode, ha ? Here they are. 
 Sir HARRY. 
 Let us retire. [They retire: 
 
 Enter Lady BAB'-J Maid and Lady 
 CHARLOTTE'S Maid. 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 
 Oh ! fie ! Lady Charlotte, you are quite indeli- 
 cate ! I'm forry for your tafte. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 Well, I fay it again, I love Vaux Hall. 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 
 O my Stars ! Why, there is no body there but 
 filthy Citizens. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 We were in Hopes the raifing the Price would 
 have kept them out, ha, ha, ha. 
 Lady BAB. 
 Ha, ha, ha, Runelow for my Money. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 Now you talk of Runelow, when did you fee the 
 Colonel, Lady Bab. 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 
 The Colonel ? I hate the Fellow. He had the 
 AfTurance to talk of a Creature in Glocefterjhire be- 
 fore my Face. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 He is a pretty Man for all that Soldiers you 
 know, have their Miilrefies every where. 
 
 Lady
 
 16 H I G H L I F E 
 
 Lady B A B. 
 I defpife him How goes on your Affair with the 
 
 Baronet ? 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 The Baronet is a ftupid Wretch, and I fjiall have 
 nothing to fay to him You are to be at Level's to- 
 night, Lady Bab ? 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 
 Unlefs I alter rriy Mind I don't admire vifiting 
 theie Commoners, Lady Charlotte. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 Oh, but Mrs. Kitty has Tafte. 
 Lady B A B. 
 She affects it. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 The Duke is fond of her, and he has Judgment. 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 
 TheDuke might mew his Judgment much better. 
 [Holding up her Head. 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 There he is and the Baronet too Take no notice 
 of them We'll rally them by-and-by. 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 
 Dull Souls ! Let us fet up a loud Laugh and 
 leave 'em. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 Ay ; Let us be gone -, for the common People 
 do fo ftare at us We mall certainly be mobb'd. 
 
 BOTH. 
 Ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha. [Exeunt. 
 
 DUKE and Sir HARRY come forward. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 They certainly faw us, and are gone off laughing 
 at us I muft follow 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 No, no. 
 
 DUKE,
 
 BELOW STAIRS. i 7 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 I muft, I muft have a Party of Raillery with 
 them, a bon moc or fo. Sir Harry * you'll excufe 
 me, Adieu, I'll be with you in the Evening, if 
 polfible -, though, hark ye, there is a Bill depending 
 in our Hcufe, which the Miniftry make a Point of 
 our attending; and fo you know, Mum ! we mud 
 mind the Stops of the Great Fiddle. Adieu. [Ex. 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 What a Coxcomb this is ! and the Fellow can't 
 read. It was but the other Day that he was Cow- 
 boy in the Country, then was bound 'Prentice to a 
 Perriwig-maker, got into my Lord Duke's Family, 
 and now fets up for a fine Gentleman. Tempera 
 P Mores ! 
 
 Re-enter DUKE'S Servant. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Sir Harry, prithee what are we to do at Level's 
 when we come there ? 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 We mall have the Fiddles, I fuppofe. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 The Fiddles ! I have done with Dancing ever 
 fince the lad fit of the Gout. I'll tell you what, 
 my dear Boy, I pofitively cannot be with them, 
 
 unlefs we have a little- [Makes a Motion as if 
 
 with the Dice-box, 
 Sir HARRY. 
 Fie, my Lord Duke. 
 
 D y K E. 
 
 Look ye, Baronet, I infiftonit. Who the Devil 
 of any Fafhion, can poffibly fpend an Evening 
 without it ? But I mall lofe the Girls, How grave 
 you look, ha, ha, ha. Well, let there be Fiddles. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 But, my dear Lord, I mail be quite miferable 
 without you. - 
 
 C DUKE"
 
 i8 H I G H L I F E 
 
 DUKE- 
 
 Well, I won't be particular, I'Jl do as the reft do. 
 Tol, lol, lol. [Exit, fivging and dancing. 
 
 Sir HARRY, folus. 
 
 He had the AlTurance, laft Winter, to court -4 
 Tradefman's Daughter in theCity, with Two Thou- 
 
 fand Pounds to her Fortune, and got me to 
 
 write his Love-letters. He pretended to be an En- 
 fign in a marching Regiment ; fo wheedled the 
 old Folks into Confent, and would have carried 
 the Girl off, but was unluckily prevented by the 
 Wamerwoman, who happened to be his firftCoufin. 
 
 (Enter PHILIP.) 
 
 . Mr. Philip, your Servant. 
 PHILIP. 
 
 You are welcome to England, Sir Harry ; I hope 
 you received the Card, and will do us the Honour. 
 of your Company My Mafter is gone into De- 
 von/hire We'll have a roaring Night. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 I'll certainly wait on you. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 The Girls will be with us. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 Is this a Wedding Supper, Pbilip ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 What do you mean, Sir Harry ? 
 
 Sir H A R R Y. 
 The Duke tells me fo. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 The Duke is a Fool. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 Take Care what you fay; his Grace is a Bruifer. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 I am a Pupil of the fame Academy, and not 
 afraid of him, I allure you: Sir Harry , we'll have 
 a noble Batch I have fuch Wine for you ! 
 
 Sir
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 19 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 I am your Man, Phil. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Egad the Cellar fhall bleed : I have fome Bur- 
 gundy that is fit for an Emperor My Mafter 
 
 would have given his Ears for fome of it t'other 
 Day, to treat my Lord What-d'ye-call-him with ; 
 but I told him it was all gone-, ha? Charity be- 
 gins at home, ha ? Odfo, here is Mr. Free- 
 
 tnan, my Mailer's intimate Friend ; he is a dry one. 
 Don't let us be feen together He'll fufpecl: 
 fomething. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 I am gone. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Away, away Remember, Burgundy is the 
 
 Word, 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Right Long Corks ! ha, Phil? \Mimicfa tke 
 drawing of a Cork.] Your's. [Exit. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Now for a Caft of my Office A Starch Phiz, 
 
 a canting Phrafe, and as many Lies as neceflary 
 Hem! 
 
 Enter FREEMAN. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Oh ! Philip How do you do, Philip ? You 
 have loft your Mafter, I find. 
 PHILIP. 
 
 It is a Lofs indeed, Sir So good a Gentleman ! 
 He muft be nearly got into Devon/hire by this 
 
 Time Sir, your Servant. [Going. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Why in fuch a Hurry, Pb'.lip ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 I mall leave the Houfe as little as poffible, now 
 his Honour is away. 
 
 C 2 FREEMAN.
 
 20 H I G H L I F E. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 You arc in the right, Philip. 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Servants at fuch Times are too apt to be neg- 
 Jigent and extravagant, Sir. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 True ; the Matter's Abfence is the Time to try 
 a good Servant in. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 It is fo, Sir : Sir, your Servant. [Going. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Oh ! Mr. Philip pray flay you mult do me 
 a Piece of Service. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 You command me, Sir [Bows. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 I look upon you, Philip^ as one of the beft be- 
 haved, moft fenfible, completed [Philip bows'} 
 Rafcals in the World. \Aftde. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Your Honour is pleafed to compliment. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 There is a Tenant of mine in Effex, a very ho- 
 neft Man Poor Fellow, he has a great Num- 
 ber of Children ; and they have fent me one of 
 'em , a tall, gawkie Boy, to make a Servant of; 
 but my Folks fay they can do nothing with him. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Let me have him, Sir. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 In Truth, he is an unlick'd Cub. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 I will lick him into ibmething, I warrant you, 
 
 Sir. Now my Mafter is abfent, I (hall have a 
 
 good deal of Time upon my Hands ; and I hate 
 to be idle, Sir : in two Months I'll engage to finifh 
 him. 
 
 FREEMAN.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 21 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 I don't doubt it. [djide. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Sir, I have Twenty Pupils in the Parifli of St. 
 James's ; and for a Table, or a Side-board, or be- 
 hind an Equipage, or in the Delivery of a MeiTage, 
 
 or any thing 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 What have you for Entrance ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 I always leave it to Gentlemen's Generofity. 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Here is a Guinea 1 beg he may be taken 
 
 Care of. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 That he fhall, I promife you [Afide^\ Your Ho- 
 nour knows me. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Thoroughly. [Afide. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 When can I fee him, Sir ? 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Now directly call at my Houfe, and take him 
 in your Hand. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Sir, I will be with you in a Minute I will 
 
 but ftep into the Market, to let the Tradefmen know 
 they muft not truft any of our Servants, now they 
 are at Board-wages Humh ! 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 How happy is Mr. Lovel in fo excellent a Ser- 
 vant. [Exit. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Ha, ha, ha! This is one of my Matter's pru- 
 dent Friends, who dines with him three times a 
 Week, and thinks he is mighty generous in giving 
 
 me five Guineas at Cbriftmas Damn all.fuch 
 
 fneaking Scoundrels, I fay. [Exit. 
 
 SCENE
 
 22 HIGH LIFE 
 
 SCENE, Me Servant's Hall in LovEL'V 
 
 Houfe. 
 KINGSTON and COACHMAN, drunk andjleepy. 
 
 [Knocking at the Door. 
 KINGSTON. 
 
 Some body knocks Coaehy, go go to 
 
 the Door, Coaehy. 
 
 COACHMAN. 
 
 I'll not go do you go you black Dog. 
 
 KINGSTON. 
 
 Devil mall fetch me, if I go. [Knocking. 
 
 COACHMAN. 
 
 , Why then let 'em ftay I'll not go Damme 
 
 Aye, knock the Door down, and let yourfelf 
 in. [Knocking. 
 
 KINGSTON. 
 
 Ay, ay, ..knock again knock again 
 
 COACHMAN. 
 
 Matter is gone into Devon/hire So he can't 
 
 be there So I'll go to deep. 
 
 KINGSTON. 
 
 So will I I'll go to fleep too. 
 
 COACHMAN. 
 
 You lie, Devil You mail not go to fleep 
 
 till I am afleep 1 am King of the Kitchen. 
 
 KINGSTON. 
 
 No, you are not King , but when you are drunk 
 you are fulky as a Hell. Here is Cooky coming 
 She is King and Queen too. 
 
 Enter COOK. 
 
 COOK. 
 Some body has knock'd at the Door twenty 
 
 times, and nobody hears Why Coachman 
 
 Kingftcn Ye drunken Bears, why don't one of 
 
 you go to the Door. 
 
 COACHMAN.
 
 B E L O W S T A I R S. ? j 
 
 COACHMAN. 
 You go Cook ; you go - 
 
 COOK. 
 Hang me, if I go - 
 
 KINGSTON. 
 Yes, yes, Cooky go , Molljy, Polljy go.- - . 
 
 COOK. 
 
 Out you Black Toad - It is none of my Bu-r 
 fmefs, and go I will not. [Sits down. 
 
 Enter PHILIP with LOVEL difguifed. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 I might have flaid at the Door all Night, as the 
 little Man in the Play fays, if I had not had the Key 
 of the Door in my Pocket - What is come to you 
 all ? 
 
 COOK. 
 
 There is John Coachman, and Kingflon^ as drunk 
 as two Bears. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Ah, hah ! my Lads, what finiuYd already ? 
 Thefe are the very befl of Servants - -Poor Fel- 
 lows, I fuppofe they have been drinking their 
 Mailer's good Journey - ha, ha, ha. 
 
 LOVEL. 
 No doubt on't. \Aftto. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Yo ho, get to bed, you Dogs, and fleep your- 
 felves fober, that you may be able to get drunk. 
 again by-and-by They are as fail as a Church 
 
 LOVEL. 
 Anon ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Do you love drinking ? 
 
 LOVEL. 
 Yes, I loves Ale. 
 
 PHILIP.
 
 H HIGHLIFE. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 You Dog, you mall fwim in Burgundy. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Burgrumdy ? what's that ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Cook, wake thofe honed Gentlemen, and fend 
 them to bed. 
 
 COOK. 
 
 It is impoffible to wake them. 
 L O V E L. 
 I think I could wake 'em, Sir, if I might Heh > 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Do Jemmy, wake 'em Jemmy ha, ha, ha. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Hip, Mr. Coachman. [Gives him a great Slap 
 
 on the Face. 
 COACHMAN. 
 Oh! oh! What? Zounds! Oh! Damn you! 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 What Blackey, Blackey. [Pulls him by tbe Nofe. 
 KINGSTON. 
 
 Oh! oh! What now! Curfeyou! Oh! 
 
 Cot tam you. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Ha, ha, ha. 
 <'... PHILIP. 
 
 Ha, ha, ha, Well done Jemmy. Cook, fee 
 
 thofe gentry to bed. 
 
 COOK. 
 
 Marry come up, I fay fo too ; not I indeed. - 
 
 COACHMAN. 
 
 She fhan't fee us to bed We'll fee ourfelves to 
 bed. 
 
 KINGSTON, 
 
 We got drunk together, and we'll go to bed 
 together. [Exeunt, reeling. 
 
 PHILIP.
 
 BELOW S T A I It S. 25 
 
 PHILIP. 
 You fee how we live, Boy. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Yes, I fees how you live. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 ' Let the Supper be elegant, Cook. 
 
 COOK. 
 Who pays for it ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 My Mafter to be lure : Who elfe ? ha, ha, ha. 
 He is rich enough, I hope, ha, ha, ha. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Humh. [Afide. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Each of us muft take a Part, and fink it in our 
 next weekly Bills ; that is the Way. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Soh ! [Jfide. 
 
 COOK. 
 
 Prithee Philip, what Boy is this ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 A Boy of Freeman's recommending. 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Yes, I'm 'Squire Freeman's Boy, Heh 
 
 COOK. 
 
 Freeman is a flingy Hound ; and you may tell him 
 I fay fo. He dines here three Times a Week, and 
 I never faw the Colour of his Money yet. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Ha, ha, ha, That is Good Freeman lhall 
 
 have it. [Afide. 
 
 COOK. 
 
 I muft flep to the Tallow-Chandler's, to difpofe 
 of fome of my Perquifites ; and then I'll fet about 
 Supper. 
 
 D PHILIP
 
 26 H I G H L I F E 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Well faid, Cook, that is right, the Perquifite li 
 the Thing, Cook. 
 
 COOK. 
 Clot) doe, where are you, Cloe. [balls. 
 
 Enter CLOE. 
 CLOE. 
 
 Yes, Miftrefs. 
 
 COOK. 
 Take that Box, and follow me. [Exit. 
 
 CLOE. 
 Yes, Miftrefs , [fakes the Box."} Who is this ? 
 
 [feeing Lovel.] Hee, hee, hee, O chi ! . This 
 
 is" pretty Boy Hee, hee, hee. Oh This 
 
 is pretty Red Hair, hee, hee, hee You mall be 
 
 in love with me by-and-by Hee, hee. [Exit, 
 
 chucking Lovel under the Chin. 
 LOVEL. 
 
 A very pretty Amour. [Afide.] Oh la ! What a fine 
 Room is this Is this the Dining Room, pray Sir? 
 
 P H I L Z P. 
 No, our Drinking Room. 
 
 LOVEL. 
 
 La! la! What a fine Lady here is. This is 
 Madam, I fuppofe. 
 
 Enter KITTY. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Where have you been, Kitty ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 I have been difpofing of fome of his Honour's 
 Shirts, and other Linnen, which it is a Shame his 
 
 Honour fnould wear any longer. Mother Barter 
 
 is above and waits to know if you have any Com- 
 mands for her. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 I (hall difpofe of my Wardrobe to-morrow. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Who have we here ? [Lovel bcws. 
 
 PHILIP,
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 27 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 A Boy of Freeman's, a poor filly Fool 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Thank you [Jftde. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 I intend the Entertainment this Evening as a 
 Compliment to you, Kitty. 
 
 KITTY. 
 I am your humble, Mr. Philip. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 But I beg I may fee none of your Airs, or hear 
 any of your French Gibberim with the Duke. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Don't be jealous, Phil. [Faivningly. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 I intend, before our Marriage, to fettle fome- 
 thinghandlbme upon you^ and with the fivehundre4. 
 Pounds which 1 have already faved in this extra- 
 vagant Fellow's Family 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 A Dog ! [AJjde] O la, la, what, have you 
 
 got five hundred Pounds ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Peace, Blockhead 
 
 KITTY. 
 I'll tell you what you mall do, Phil. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Aye, what mail I do ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 You mall fet up a Chocolate-houfe, my Dear 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Yes, and be cuckolded {Apart ^ 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 You know my Education was a very genteel 
 one - I was Half-boarder at Chelfea, and I fpeak 
 French like a Native Comment vcus porter iwus, 
 
 \ Awkardly. 
 D 2 PHILIP,
 
 28 H I G H L I F E 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Plha! Pma! 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 One is nothing without French I fhall fhine ir} 
 the Bar Do you fpeak French, Boy ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Anon 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Anon O the Fool ! ha, ha, ha ! Come here, 
 do, and let me new mould you a little you muffc 
 be a good Boy, and wait upon the Gentlefolks to 
 Night. [She ties and powders bis**. . . 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Yes, aVt pleafe you, I'll do my beft, 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 His Beft! O the Natural ! This is a flrange 
 Head of Hair of thine, Boy It is fo coarfe, and 
 ib carrotty. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 All my Brothers and Sifters be red in the Pole. 
 
 P H I L I P K I T T Y. 
 Ha, ha, ha! [LoudLaugb. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 There Now you are ibmething like Come, 
 Philip, give the Bloy a Lefibn, and then I'll lecture 
 him out of the Servants' Guide. 
 P H I L I P. 
 
 Come, Sir, firft, Hold up your Plead very 
 well Turn out your Toes, Sir very well . 
 
 Now call Coach 
 
 L O V E L. 
 What is call Coach ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Thus, Sir: Coach, Coach, Coach, {Loud. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Coach, Coach, Coach. {Imitating. 
 
 PHILIP.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 29 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Admirable ! the Knave has a good Ear Now, 
 ir, tell me a Lie. 
 
 LOVE L. 
 Oh la ! I never told a Lie in all my Life. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Then it is high Time you mould begin now ; 
 what is a Servant good for that can't tell a Lie ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 And (land in it Now I'll lefture him [Takes 
 out a Book] This is The Servants' Guide to Wealth, 
 by Timothy Shoulderknot,/0rw<r/y Servant to feveral 
 Nobkmen, and now an Officer in the Cujloms. NeceJJa- 
 ry for all Servants. 
 
 PHILIP, 
 
 Mind, Sir, what excellent Rules the Book con- 
 tains, and remember them well Come, A7//y, 
 begin . 
 
 KITTY. (Reads.) 
 
 Advice to the Footman 
 *? Let it for ever be your Plan 
 " To be the Matter, not the Man, 
 f e And do as little as you can. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 He, he, he ! Yes, I'll do nothing at all , 
 not I. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 " At Market, never think it Stealing, 
 " Tb keep with Tradefmen proper Dealing , 
 " All Stewards have a Fellow-feeling. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 You will underftand that better one Day or 
 other, Boy.' 
 
 KITTY. 
 To the Groom : 
 " Never allow your Matter able 
 " To judge of Matters in the Stable. 
 
 If 
 
 an, ( 
 i. 3
 
 30 H I G H L I F E 
 
 " If he mould roughly fpeak his Mind, 
 
 " Or to difmifs you feems inclin'd, 
 
 " Lame the beft Horfe, or break his Wind, 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Oddines ! that's good he, he, he ; 
 
 KITTY. 
 To the Coachman : 
 " If your good Mafter on you doats, 
 
 <c Ne'er leave his Houfe to ferve a Stranger, 
 " But pocket Hay, and Straw, and Oats, 
 " And let the Horfes eat the Manger. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Eat the Manger ! he, he, he ! 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 1 won't give you too much at a Time Here 
 Boy, take the Book, and read it every Night and 
 Morning before you fay your Prayers. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Ha, ha, ha ! very good But now for Bufi- 
 
 finefs. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Right I'll go and get out one of the Damafk 
 Table-cloths, and fome Napkins ; and be fure, Phil, 
 your Side- board is very fmart. [#//, 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 That it mail Come, Jemmy [Exit. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Soh! Soh! It works well. [Exit. 
 
 E N D of the Firft Act. 
 
 ACT
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 
 
 ACT II. 
 
 S C E N E, Thf Servants Hall, with the 
 Supper and Side-board Jet out, 
 
 PHILIP, KITTY, and LOVEL. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 5fc^)$CELL, PM. what think you? Don't we 
 \v" ^ look very fmart? Now let 'em come 
 as foon as they will, we fhall be ready for 
 
 > em . 
 
 PHILIP. 
 'Tis all very well ; but 
 
 KITTY. 
 But what ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Why, I v/ifh we could get that fnarling Cur, 
 
 KITTY. 
 What is the matter with him ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 I don't know - He's a queer Son of a - 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Oh, I know him ; he is one of your fneaking 
 half bred Fellows, that prefers his Matter's Intereft 
 to his own. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 ' Here he is 
 
 (Enter TOM.) 
 
 And why won't you make one to-night, tfom? 
 Here's Cook and Coachman, and all of us. 
 
 TOM.
 
 32 H I G ri L I P E 
 
 TOM. 
 I tell you again, I will not make one.' 
 
 PHILIP. 
 We ihall have fomething that's good. 
 
 TOM. 
 And make your Matter pay for it< 
 
 PHILIP. 
 I warrant, now, you think yourfelf mighty ho j 
 
 neft Ha, ha, ha. 
 
 TOM. 
 A little honefler than you, I hope, and not brag 
 
 neither. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Harkyee, you Mr. Honefty, don't be faucy ^- 
 
 L O V E L. 
 This is worth liftening to. \Afide. 
 
 T O M. 
 
 What, Madam, you are afraid for your Cully, 
 are you ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Cully, Sirrah, Cully? Afraid, Sirrah, afraid of 
 what ? [Goes up to Tom. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Ay, Sir, afraid of what ? [Goes up on the other fide. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Ay, Sir, afraid of what ? [Goes up too. 
 
 TOM. 
 I value none of you 1 know your Tricks, 
 
 PHILIP. 
 What do you know, Sirrah ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Ay, what do you know ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Ay, Sir, what do you know ? 
 
 TOM.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 33 
 
 TOM. 
 I know that you two are in Fee with every 
 
 Tradefman belonging to the Houfe. And that 
 
 yon, Mr.Clodpok, are in a fair Way to be h an g*d. 
 
 [Strikes Lovei. 
 PHILIP. 
 What do you flrike the Boy for ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 It is an honed Blow. [Afide. 
 
 TOM. 
 
 I'll ftrike him again. 'Tis fuch as you that 
 
 bring a Scandal upon us all. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Come, none of your Impudence, Tom. 
 
 TOM. 
 
 Egad, Madam, the Gentry may well complain, 
 when they get fuch Servants as you in their Houfes. 
 There's your good Friend, Mother Barter^ the 
 old-cloaths Woman, the greateft Thief in Town, 
 juft now gone out with her Apron full of his Ho- 
 nour's Linnen. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Well, Sir, and did you never ha ! 
 
 TOM. 
 
 No, never : I have liv'd with his Honour four 
 Years, and never took the Value of That- [Snapping 
 his Fingers.'] His Honour is a Prince ; gives noble 
 Wages, and keeps noble Company, and yet you 
 two are not contented, but cheat him wherever you 
 
 can lay your Fingers. Shame on you ! 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 The Fellow I thought a Rogue is the only ho- 
 neft Servant in my Houfe. [Afide. 
 
 KITTY. 
 'Out you mealy-mouth'd Cur ! 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Well, go, tell his Honour, do ha, ha, ha. 
 
 E TOM.
 
 34 H I G H L I F E 
 
 TOM. 
 
 I fcorn that Damn an Informer ! but yet, 
 I hope his Honour will find you two out, one 
 
 Day or other That's all. I Exit. 
 
 KITTY. 
 This Fellow muft be taken care of. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 I'll do his Bufmefs for him, when his Honour 
 comes to Town. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 You lie you Scoundrel, you will not. [Afide.~\ 
 . O la, here is a fine Gentleman. 
 
 Enter DUKE'S Servant. 
 
 DUKE 
 
 Ah ! ma chere Mademfeille ! Comment vous 
 portez vous ? [Salute. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Fort bien, je vous remercier. Mounfieur. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Now we mail have Nonfenfe by wholefale. 
 
 DUKE. 
 How do you do, Philip ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Your Grace's humble Servant. 
 DUKE. 
 
 But my dear Kitty \Talk apart. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Jemmy. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Anon ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Come along with me, and I will make you free 
 of the Cellar. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Yes I will But won't you afk be to drink ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 No, no ; he will have his Share by and by. 
 Come along. 
 
 LOVEL ,
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 35 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Yes. [Exeunl Philip and Lovel. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Indeed I thought your Grace an Age in coming. 
 
 DUKE. 
 Upon Honour, our Houfe is but this Moment 
 
 up. You have a damn'd vile Collection of 
 
 Pictures I obferve, above Stairs, Kitty Your 
 
 'Squire has no Tafte. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 No Tafte ? That's impoffible, for he has laid 
 out a vaft deal of Money, 
 
 PUKE. 
 
 There is not an original Picture in the whole 
 Collection Where could he pick 'em up ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 He employs three or four Men to buy for him, 
 and he always pays for Originals. 
 DUKE. 
 
 Donnez moi votre Eau de Luce My Head 
 
 aches confoundedly [She gives a Smelling-bottle.] 
 
 Kitty > my dear, I hear you are going to be married, 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Pardonnez moi, for that. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 If you get a Boy, I'll be Godfather, Faith. 
 KITTY. 
 
 How you rattle, Duke! I am thinking, 
 
 my Lord, when I had the Honour to fee you 
 laft. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 At the Play, Mademfeille. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Your Grace loves a Play ? 
 
 E 2 DUKE.
 
 36 H I G H L I F E 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 . No It is a dull old-fafhioned Entertainment 
 - 1 hate it. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Well, give me a good tragedy. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 It muft not be a modern one then You are de- 
 vilifh handfome, Kale Kifs me [Offers to kifs her. 
 
 Enter Sir HARRY'.? Servant. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Oh ho, are you thereabouts, my Lord Duke ? 
 That may do very well by and by However 
 you'll never find me behind- hand. [Offers to 
 
 kifs her. 
 DUKE. 
 
 Stand off, you are a Commoner Nothing un- 
 der Nobility approaches Kitty. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 You are fo devilifh proud of your Nobility 
 Now I think, we have more true Nobility than 
 you Let me tell you, Sir, a Knight of the 
 Shire - 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 A Knight of the Shire! ha, ha, ha! a mighty 
 Honour, truly, to reprefent all the Fools in the 
 County. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 O lud ! this is charming to fee two Noblemen 
 quarrel. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Why any Fool may be born to a Title, but 
 only a wife Man can make himfelf honourable. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Well-faid, Sir Harry, that is good Morillity. 
 
 DUKE.
 
 BE LOW STAIRS. 37 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 I hope you make fome Difference between He- 
 reditary Honours and the Huzzas of a Mob. 
 KITTY. 
 
 Very fm art, my Lord Now, Sir Harry 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 If you make ufeof your Hereditary Honours to 
 
 fcreen you from Debt 
 
 DUKE. 
 Zounds ! Sir, what do you mean by that ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Hold, hold, I fhall have fome fine old Noble 
 Blood fpilt here Ha' done, Sir Harry 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Not I Why he is always valuing himfelf upon 
 his Upper Houfe. 
 
 DUKE. 
 We" have Dignity. [Slow. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 But what becomes of your Dignity if we re- 
 fufe the Supplies ? [Quick. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Peace, Peace Here's Lady Bab 
 
 (Enter Lady BAB'J Servant in a Chair.) 
 
 Dear Lady Bab 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 
 Mrs. Kitty, your Servant I was afraid of tak- 
 ing cold, and fo ordered the Chair down Stairs. 
 Well, and how do you do ? My Lord Duke, 
 your Servant and Sir Harry too your's. 
 
 DUKE. 
 Your Ladyfhip's devoted 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 I am afraid I have trefpafTed in Point of Time 
 
 {Looks on her Watch] But I got into my 
 
 fav'rite Author. 
 
 DUKE.
 
 38 H I G H L I F E 
 
 DUKE. 
 Yes, I found her Ladyfhip at her Studies this 
 
 Morning Some wicked Poem 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 Oh you Wretch ! I never read but one Book. 
 
 KITTY. 
 What is your Ladyfhip fo fond of ? 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 Sbikfpur. Did you never read Shikfpur ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Shikfpur? Shikfpur? Who wrote it ? No, I 
 never read Shikfpur. 
 
 Lady BAB. 
 Then you have an immenfe Pleafure to come. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Well then, 1*11 read it over one Afternoon or 
 other. Here's Lady Charlotte. 
 
 (Enter Lady CHARLOTTE'S Maid in a Chair.) 
 
 Dear Lady Charlotte. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 Oh, Mrs. Kitty * I thought I never mould have 
 
 reach'd your Houfe Such a Fit of the Cholic 
 
 feiz'd me Oh, Lady Bab^ how long has your 
 Ladyfhip been here ? My Chairmen were fuch 
 Drones My Lord Duke, the Pink of all good 
 Breedi ng 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Oh Mam [Bowing. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 
 And Sir Harry Your Servant, Sir Harry. 
 
 [Formally. 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Madam, your Servant I am forry to hear your 
 Ladyfhip has been ill. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 You mufl give me leave to doubt the Sincerity 
 of that Sorrow, Sir Remember the Park. 
 
 Sir
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 39 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 The Park ? I'll explain that Affair, Madam. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 
 I want none of your Explanations. [Scornfully* 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Dear Lady Charlotte ! 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 
 No, Sir ; I have obferv'd your Coolnefs of late, 
 and defpiie you A trumpery Baronet ! 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 I fee how it is ; nothing will fatisfy you but No- 
 bility That fly Dog the Marquifs 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 
 None of your Reflections, Sir The Marquifs 
 is a Perlbn of Honour, and above enquiring after 
 a Lady's Fortune, as you meanly did. 
 
 Sir H A R R Y. 
 
 I I Madam ? I fcorn fuch a thing < I 
 allure you, Madam, I never That is to fay 
 Egad I am confounded My Lord Duke, what 
 mall I fay to her Pray help me out. [Afide. 
 
 DUKE. 
 Afk her to mew her Legs Ha, ha, ha. \Afide. 
 
 Enter PHILIP andLovEL, loaded mtb Bottles. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Here, my little Peer Here is Wine that will 
 ennoble your Blood Both your Ladymips moil 
 humble Servant. 
 
 L O V E L. (JffeSing to be drunk. 
 
 Both your Ladylhips moil humble Servant. - 
 
 KITTY. 
 Why, Philip, you have made the Boy drunk. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 I have made him free of the Cellar. Ha, ha, ha. 
 
 LOVEL.
 
 4 o H I G H L I F E 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Yes, I am free I am very free. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 He has had a Smack of every Sort of Wine, 
 from humble Port to Imperial Tokay. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Yes, I have been drinking Kokay. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Go, get you fome Sleep, Child, that you may 
 wait on his Lordfhip by-and-by. 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Thank you, Madam I will certainly wait 
 
 on their Lordfhips and their Ladyfhips too. [/$&* 
 
 and exit. 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Well, Ladies, what fay you to a Dance, and then 
 to Supper ? Have you had your Tea ? 
 
 ALL. 
 A Dance, a Dance No Tea No Tea. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Here, Fidler [calls.] 1 have provided a very 
 good Hand, you fee. 
 
 (Enter FIDLER, with a wooden Leg .) 
 
 Sir H A R R Y. 
 Not fo well legg'd, Mr. Philip. 
 
 ALL. 
 Ha, ha, ha. 
 
 B U K E. 
 
 Le drole ! Harkye, Mr. which Leg do you 
 beat Time with ? 
 
 ALL. 
 Ha, ha, ha. [Loud Laugh. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 What can you play, Domine ? 
 
 FIDLER. 
 
 Any thing, an't pleale your Honour, from a 
 a Jig to a Sonata. 
 
 PHILIP.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 41 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Come here Where are all our People ? 
 
 [Enter Coachman, Cook, Kingfton, Cloe.] I'll 
 couple you My Lord Duke will take Kitty 
 Lady Bab will do me the Honour of her Hand ; 
 Sir Harry and Lady Charlotte Coachman and 
 
 Cook, and the two Devils dance together 
 
 Ha, ha, ha. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 With SubmifTion, the Country Dances by-and- 
 by. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 
 Ay, ay ; French Dances before Supper, and 
 Country Dances after I beg the Duke and Mrs. 
 Kitty may give us a Minuet. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Dear Lady Charlotte, confider my poor Gout 
 Sir Harry will oblige us. [Sir Harry bows. 
 
 ALL. 
 Minuet, Sir Harry Minuet, Sir Harry 
 
 F I D L E R. 
 
 What Minuet would your Honours pleafe to 
 have ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 What Minuet ? Let me fee Play Marjhal 
 
 thingumbob's Minuet. 
 
 [A Minuet by Sir Harry and Kitty, awkward 
 
 and conceited. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 Mrs. Kitty dances fweetly. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 And Sir Harry delightfully. 
 DUKE. 
 
 Well enough for a Commoner. 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Come now to Supper A Gentleman and a 
 
 Lady Here, Fidler [gives Money.'] Wait without 
 
 F FJDLEK,
 
 42 H I G H L I F E 
 
 F I D L E R. 
 
 Yes, an't pleafe your Honour. [#//, with a 
 
 'Tankard. 
 [They fit down-] 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 We will fet the Wine on the Table Here is 
 Claret, Burgundy, and Champagne, and a Bottle 
 of Tokay for the Ladies There ar* Tickets on 
 every Bottle If any Gentleman chufes Port 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Port ? 'Tis only fit for a Dram. 
 KITTY. 
 
 Lady Bab, what mall I fend you ? Lady 
 
 Charlotte, pray be free j the more free, the more 
 
 welcome, as they fay in my Country. The 
 
 Gentlemen will be fogood as to take care of them- 
 feives. \A Paufe. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Lady Gfor/0//*, " Hob or Nob! " 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 Done, my Lord In Burgundy, if you pleafe. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Here's your Sweetheart and mine, and the Friends 
 of the Company. \bey drink. A Paufe t 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Come, Ladies and Gentlemen, a Bumper all 
 round I have a Health for you " Here is to 
 " the Amendment of our Mafters and MiftrefTes." 
 
 ALL.. 
 
 Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. [Loud Laugh. A 
 
 Paufe. 
 KITTY. 
 
 Ladies, pray what is your Opinion of a fingle 
 Gentleman's Service ? 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 Do you mean an old fingle Gentleman ? 
 
 ALL. 
 
 Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. \Lcud Laugh f 
 
 3 PHILIP.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 43 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 My Lord Duke, your Toaft. 
 DUKE. 
 
 Lady Betty 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Oh no A Health and a Sentiment. 
 DUKE. 
 
 A Health and a Sentiment ? No, no, let us 
 
 have a Song -Sir Harry, your Song. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Would you have it ? Well then Mrs. Kitty, 
 
 we mud call upon you Will you honour my 
 
 Mufe ? 
 
 A L L. 
 
 A Song, a Song, ay, ay, Sir Harry's Song 
 Sir Harry's Song. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 A Song to be fure, but firft, Preludio 
 
 [Kijfcs Kitty.] Pray Gentlemen put it about. 
 
 [KfJ/ing round Kingfton ki/es Cloe heartily. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 See how the Devils kifs ! 
 
 KITTY. 
 I-am really hoarfe -, but Hem I muft clear up 
 
 my my Pipes Hem This is Sir Harry's 
 
 Song ; being a new Song, entitled and called, 
 
 The Fellow- Servant, or All in a Livery. 
 [KITTY Sings.'] 
 
 I. 
 
 Come here Fellow Servant, and lijlen to me, 
 Tlljhew you how thofe of fuperior Degree 
 Are only Defendants, no better than we. 
 Chorus, Both high and low in this do agree, 
 'T'is here Fellow Servant, 
 And there Fellow Servant, 
 And all in a Livery. 
 
 F 2 Chorus,
 
 44 H I G II L I F E 
 
 II. 
 
 See yonder fine Spark in Embroidery dreft, 
 
 Who lows to the Great, and if they fmile, is bleft -, 
 
 What is he ? P faith, but a Servant at beft. 
 
 Cho. Both high, &c. 
 
 III. 
 
 Nature made all alike, no Diftinflionjhe craves, 
 So we laugh at the great World, its Fools and its 
 
 Knaves, 
 For we are all Servants, but they are all Slaves. 
 
 Cho. Both high, &c. 
 
 IV. 
 
 The fat jhining Glutton, leoks up to the Shelf, 
 Ibe wrinkled lean Mifer bows down to his Pelf, 
 And the curlpated Beau is a Slave to himfelf. 
 
 Cho. Both high, &rc. 
 
 V. 
 
 ^he gay fparklivg Belle, who the whole 'Town alarms, 
 And with Eyes, Lips, and Neck, fets the Smarts all 
 
 in Arms, 
 
 Is a VaJJal herfclf, a mere Drudge to htr Charms. 
 Cho. Both high, &c. 
 
 VI. 
 Tfan we'll drink like our Betters, and laugh, fing, 
 
 and love -, 
 
 And whenfick of one Place, to another we'll move, 
 
 For with Little and Great, the beft Joy is to rove. 
 
 Chorus, Both high and low, in this do agree, 
 
 That 'tis here Fellow Servant, 
 
 And there Fellow Servant, 
 
 And all in a Livery. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 How do you like it, my Lord Duke ? 
 DUKE. 
 
 It is a damn'd vile compofition-! 
 
 PHILIP. 
 How fo ? 
 
 DUKE.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 45 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 very low ! Very low indeed. 
 
 Sir HARRY, 
 Can you make a better ? 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 1 hope fo. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 That is very conceited. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 What is conceited, you Scoundrel ? 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Scoundrel! You are a Rafcal I'll pull you 
 
 by the Nofe , [All rife. 
 
 DUKE. 
 Look ye, Friend , don't give yourfelf Airs, and 
 
 make a Difturbance among the Ladies. If you 
 
 are a Gentleman, name your Weapons. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Weapons ! What you will Piftols 
 DUKE. 
 
 Done Behind Montague Houfe 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 
 Done With Seconds. 
 
 . DUKE. 
 
 Done. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Oh for Shame, Gentlemen My Lord Duke! 
 
 Sir Harry, the Ladies ! fie ! [Duke and Sir 
 
 Harry affeft to fmg. 
 A violent Knocking. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 What the Devil can that be, Kitty ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 Who can it poffibly be ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Kingftofc) run up Stairs and peep. [Exit Kingfton] 
 
 It founds like my Mailer's Rap Pray Heaven 
 
 it
 
 46 H I G H L I F E 
 
 it is not he ? [Enter KingftonJ Well Kingjlon, 
 
 what is it? 
 
 KINGSTON. 
 
 It is Mafter and Mr. Freeman 1 peep'd thro' 
 
 the Key Hole, and faw them by the Lamp Light 
 
 Tom has juft let them in.< < 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 The Devil he' has ? What Can have brought 
 him back ! 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 No Matter what Away with the Things.- 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Away with the Wine Away with the Plate 
 
 Here Coachman, Cook, Cloe, Kingflon^ bear a 
 
 Hand Out with the Candles Away, away. 
 
 [They carry away the Table^ &c. 
 VISITORS. 
 What mail we do ? What fhall we do ? 
 
 ['They all run about in Confufion. 
 KITTY. 
 Run up Stairs, Ladies, 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 No, no, no. He'll fee you then 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 What the Devil had I to do here ! 
 
 DUKE. 
 Pox take it, face it out. 
 
 Sir HARRY. 
 Oh no i thefe PFeft-hdians are very fiery. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 I would not have him fee any of you for the 
 World. 
 
 LOVEL, without. 
 
 Pbilip Where's Philip. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Oh the Devil! he's certainly coming down Stairs 
 
 Sir Harry i rim down into the Cellar My 
 
 Lord Duke, get into the Pantry Away, away. 
 
 KITTY.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 47 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 No, no , do you put their Ladyfliips into the 
 Pantry, and I'll take his Grace into the Coal-hole. 
 VISITERS. 
 
 Any where, any where Up the Chimney if 
 
 you will. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 There in with you. 
 
 [They all go into the Pantry. 
 L O V E L without. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Coming, Sir, [Aloud.'] Kitty, have you never 
 a good Book to be reading of? 
 KITTY. 
 Yes ; here is one. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Egad, this is Black Monday with us- Sit down 
 
 Seem to read your Book Here he is, as 
 
 drunk as a Piper [They fit down. 
 
 Enter L o v E L 'with Piftols^ offering to be 
 drunk, FREEMAN following. 
 
 L o v E L. 
 Philip, the Son of Alexander the Great, where 
 
 are all my Myrmidons ? What the Devil makes 
 
 you up fo early this Morning ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 He is very drunk indeed [AJide."] Mrs. Kitty 
 and I had got into a good Bookyour Honour. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Ay, ay, they have been well employed, I dare 
 fay ha, ha, ha. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Come, fit down, Freeman^ Lie you there. [Lays 
 bis Piftols down.'] I come a little unexpectedly, per- 
 haps, Philip. 
 
 PHILIP.
 
 48 HIGH LIFE 
 
 PHILIP. 
 A good Servant is never afraid of being caught, 
 
 Sir. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 I have fome Accounts that I muft fettle. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Accounts, Sir ! to Night ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Yes ; to-night 1 find myfelf perfectly clear 
 
 you mall fee I'll fettle them in a twinkling. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Your Honour will go into the Parlour ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 No, I'll fettle 'em all here. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Your Honour muft not fit here. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Why not ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 You will certainly take Cold, Sir-, the Room has 
 not been warned above an Hour. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 "What a curfed Lie that is ! [Aftde. 
 
 DUKE. 
 pMip. Philip. Philip. [Peeping out. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Pox take you ! Hold your Tongue. \Afide. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 You have juft nick'd them in the very Minute. 
 
 \Afide to Lovel. 
 L O V E L. 
 
 I find I have Mum [Afideto Freeman.] 
 
 Get fome Wine Philip [Exit Philip.] Tho' 
 
 I muft eat fomething before 1 drink 'Kitty, what 
 
 have you got in the Pantry ? 
 
 KITTY.
 
 BELOW. STAIRS. 49 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 In the Pantry ? Lard, your honour ! We arc at 
 Board Wages. - 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 I could eat a Morfel of cold Meat. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 You fhall have it - Here - [Rifes.~] - Open 
 the Pantry Door - I'll be about your Board Wages! 
 - 1 have treated you often, now you fhall treat 
 your Matter. - 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 If I may be believed, Sir, there is not a Scrap of 
 any Thing in the World in the Pantry. 
 
 [Oppofmg him: 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Well, then we muft be contented, Freeman. - 
 Let us have a Cruft of Bread and a Bottle of Wine. 
 
 [Sits down again. 
 KITTY. 
 
 Sir, had not my Mailer better go to-bed. - 
 [Makes Signs to Freeman that Lovel is drunk. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Bed! Not I - I'll fit here all Night - 'Tis 
 very pleafant ; and nothing like variety in Life. 
 
 Sir HARRY. (Peeping.) 
 Mrs. Kitty, Mis.- Kitty - 
 
 KITTY. 
 Peace, on your Life. [Af.ds. 
 
 LOVEL. 
 9 what Voice is that ? 
 
 KITTY. 
 Nobody's, Sir. - Hem 
 
 (PHILIP brings Wine.} 
 
 Soh Very well Now do you two march 
 
 aff March off, I fay. 
 
 G PHILIP.
 
 50 HIGHLIFE 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 We can't think of leaving your Honour 
 For egad if we do, we are undone. . - [Afide. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Begone -My Service to you Freeman, Thi? 
 
 is good Stuff. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Excellent. [Somebody in the Pantryfnsez.es. 
 
 K I T T Y. 
 We are undone ; uncone [Afide. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 Oh ! That is the Duke's damn'd Rappee. [AJidt. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 Didn't you hear a Noife, Charles? 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Somebody fneez'd, 1 thought. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Damn it! There are Thieves in the Houfe- 
 
 I'll be among 'em. [Takes a PifoL 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 Lack-a-day, Sir, it was or!y the Cat They 
 
 fomctimes fneeze for all the World like a Chriftian. 
 
 Here, Jack, Jack He has got a Cold, Sir, 
 
 Pufs, Pufs. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 A Cold? Then I'll cure him Here Jack % 
 
 Jack, ' Pufs, Pufs. 
 
 KITTY. 
 
 
 Your Honour won't be fo rafh Pray your 
 
 Honour, don't. \Ppp r fig. 
 
 L * V E L. 
 
 Stand off Here Freemen Here's a Barrel 
 
 for Bufmefs, with a Brace of Slugs, and well 
 
 prim'd, as you fee Freeman I'll hold you 
 
 rive, to four Nay, I'll hold you two to one, I 
 
 hit the Cat thro' the Key-hole of that Pantry Door 
 
 FREEMAN.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 51 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Try, try, but I think it impoffible. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 I am a damn'd good Markfman. [Cocks the Pjftoly 
 
 and points it at the Pantry Docr.~\ Now for it! 
 
 [A violent Shriek^ and all is dif covered."] Who the 
 
 Devil are all thefe ? One, two, three, 
 
 four. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 They are particular Friends of mine, Sir. Ser- 
 vants to fome Noblemen in the Neighbourhood. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 I told you there were Thieves in the Houfe. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Ha, ha, ha. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 I allure your Honour they have been entertained 
 at otir own Expence, upon my Word. 
 
 KITTY. 
 Yes, indeed, your Honour, if it was the laft 
 
 Word I had to fpeak. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Take up that Bottle [Philip takes up a Bottle 
 
 with a 'Ticket to it, and is going off.] Bring it 
 
 back Do you ufually entertain your Company 
 
 with Tokay ', Monfieur ? 
 
 PHILIP. 
 I, Sir, treat with Wine ! 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 O yes, from bumble Port to imperial 'Tokay tea. 
 [Mimicking himfelf, 
 PHILIP. 
 
 How ! Jemmy my Mailer'! 
 KITTY. 
 
 *fimmy ! the Devil ! 
 
 G 2 PHILIP.
 
 52 H I G H L I F E 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 Your Honour is at prefent in liquor But in 
 the Morning, when your Honour is recovered, I 
 will fet all to rights again. 
 
 L O V E L. (Changing his Countenance, aud turning 
 
 his Wig.) 
 We'll fet all to rights now There, I am fo- 
 
 ber, at your Service What have you to fay, 
 
 Philip ? [Philip Jtarts.~] You may well ilart 
 
 Go, get out of my Sight. 
 
 DUKE. 
 
 Sir I have not the Honour to be known to you, 
 but I have the Honour to ferve his Grace the Duke 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 And the Impudence familiarly to aflume his 
 Title Your Grace will give me leave to tell you, 
 " That is, the Door" and if you ever enter 
 there again, I affure you, my Lord Duke, I will 
 break every Bone in your Grace's Skin Begone 
 
 I beg their Ladyfhip's pardon, perhaps they 
 
 cannot go without Chairs Ha, ha, ha. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Ha, ha, ha. [Sir Harry Jteals of . 
 
 DUKE. 
 Low bred Fellows ! [Exit. 
 
 Lady CHARLOTTE. 
 I thought how this Vifit would turn out. [Exit. 
 
 La<Jy BAB. 
 They are downright Hottenpots. [Exit. 
 
 PHILIP and KITTY. 
 I hope your Honour will not take away our 
 Bread. 
 
 LOVEL.
 
 BELOW STAIRS. 53 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 " Five hundred Pounds will fet you up in a 
 Cholate Houfe You'll Ihine in the Bar, Ma-; 
 " dam " I have been an Eye-witnefs of your 
 Roguery, Extravagance, and Ingratitude. 
 
 PHILIP and KITTY. 
 Oh, Sir ! - Good, Sir ! 
 
 L O V E L. 
 You> Madam, may flay here till To-morrow 
 
 Morning And there, Madam, is the Book 
 
 you lent me, which I beg you'll read " Night and 
 " Morning before you fay your Prayers." 
 KITTY. 
 
 I am ruin'd and undone. [Exit. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 But you, Sir, for your Villainy, and (what I 
 hate worfe) your Hypocrify, mall not flay a Mi- 
 nute longer in this Houfe ; and here comes an ho- 
 neft Man to mew you the Way out Your Keys 
 Sir. [ Philip gives Keys. 
 
 Enter TOM. 
 
 Tom, I refpecl aud value you You are an 
 
 honell Servant, and mall never want Encourage- 
 ment Be fo good, Tom, as to fee that Gentle- 
 man out of my Houfe [Points to Philip] and 
 
 then take charge of the Cellar and Plate. . 
 
 TOM. 
 
 I thank your Honour -, but I would not rife on 
 the Ruin of a Fellow-fervant. 
 L O V E L. 
 No Remonftrances, Tom -, it mail be as I fay. 
 
 PHILIP. 
 
 What a curfed Fool have I been ? [Exeunt Ser- 
 vants. 
 
 LOVEL.
 
 54 H I G H L I F E, &c. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 Well, Charles^ I muft thank you for my Frolick 
 It has been a wholefome one to me - Have 
 I done right ? 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 Entirely No Judge could have determin'd 
 better - As you punifh'd the bad, it was but Ju- 
 flice to reward the good. - 
 L O V E L. 
 A faithful Servant is a worthy Character. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 Andean never receive too much Encouragement. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 tf Right. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 You have made Tom very happy. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 And I intend to make your Robert fo too 
 Every honeft Servant mould be made happy. 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 
 But what an infufferable Piece of Afiurance is it 
 .in fome of thefe Fellows to affect and imitate their 
 Matters' Manners ? 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 What Manners muft thofe be, which they can 
 imitate ? 
 
 FREEMAN. 
 True. 
 
 L O V E L. 
 
 If Perfons of Rank would act up to their Stan- 
 dard, it would be impoffible that their Servants 
 could ape them - But when they affect every 
 thing that is ridiculous, it will be in the Power of 
 any low Creature to follow their Example, 
 
 We E N D.
 
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