yC-NRLF *B Byo 5^7 LIBRARY OF THE University of California (O GIFT OF n Class ^0: ■ I J. EDWARD BOYD, B, B< R 1 1 REMEMBER That we also do all kinds of Photographic finishing and work that will please the most fastidious BURTON & RATHKE The South Berkeley DR UGGISTS 3276 Adeline Street Digitized by tine Internet Arciiive in 2007 witii funding from IVIicrosoft Corporation http://www.archive.org/details/ancientpoetryrevOOboydricli South Berkeley Bank GROWTH OF DEPOSITS OPENED FOR BUSINESS MARCH I, I904 March ist, 1904 - - $1,900.78 September ist, 1904 - $37,468.05 March ist, 1905 - - $55,131.07 September ist, 1905 - $83,541.03 March ist, 1906 - - $116,755.14 July ist, 1906 - - $181,609.77 November 21, 1906 - $256,298.62 February 20, 1907 - $297,000.00 POND'S PHARMAG^?.^F>^ UNIVERSITY OF Corner Center St. and ShattttskJ.Aye-'''''^ BERKELEY, CAL ANCIENT POETRY Revised and Modernized by J. EDWARD BOYD, B. B. B Professor of Trunkology, (xraduate of Sing Sing and Lecturer on How to Rope a Trunk and Honswogle the Owner PRKSS nv HAOLK PRl<:SS 1745 ALCATKAZ AVICNUH vSO UT H B K R K K LP: Y Keep Your Eye on North Berkeley It is the place for the STiVTE CA^PITOL and the place for your CAPITAL Before you invest your capital call on L. J. m:ora:n^ -J, F, CHASERS Real Estate Office, North Berkeley Phone Oakland 1530 S. H. MOTT Touring cars at all hours Day & Night Stand at Billy Neail's, 1007 Broadway Oakland, Cal. PREFACE UNIVERSITY This artistic work is gotten up regard- less of expense (we never calculated to pay the printer anyhow). While the poetry is pure and undefiled "Rot" which thellealth Board compelled us to have fumigated before insertion the same by no means applies to the merchants whose advertisements appear in this book. The merchants of Berkeley have come here to stay. It is not like the big cities where a man drops in once and you never see him again. They are level- headed, wise business men and know that to retain a man's confidence and custom they must play a square game. Act white and treat their customers fairly. We beb'eve every advertiser in this volume will use you well if you call on him. You will be courtiously re- ceived, made welcome, treated squarely and invited to call again. There is only one business man in town who neglects giving that invitation and that is the Undertaker on Street. One word of caution to our readers. Peruse the ad matter frequently and learn the best place to trade. But beware of the "Poetry" an overdose is likely to bring on an attack of dyspepsia. 161419 xn .0 Cf<5 ON A HOOK AND EYK. A few years ago a Hook and Eye manufacturer of Detroit, Mich, offered prizes for the best poem on their goods. The following beautiful lines were written by our youngest daughter four years, seven months and three days of age. To our great surprise our child re- ceived a beautiful tin cup richly en- graved as first prize and we have never spoken to common people since. Author I won't compete, and I'll tell you why I have no use for a hook or an eye. If I "bust a button," I simply grin Until I get hold of a safety pin. A fellow would be in a terrible mess If he had a woman to hook his — dress. A man will make all kinds of hitches Kre asking a woman to button his breeches And you can bet as sure as fate She'd make a blunder and not button straight. So now you know the reason why I want nothing to do with hook or eye. For I should faint I do confess If a woman asked me to hook her dress. ROUST & CO. CONTRi^CTORS BUILDERS Estimates and Plans Furnished GENERAL JOBBING 1745 ALCATRAZ AVENUE Berkeley, Cal. RESIDKNCK: 6508 Raymond Street, Oakland BACKWARD TURN BACKWARD Backward, turn backward, O, time in thy flight, Feed me on gruel again, just for to-night; I am so wearied of restaurant steaks, Petrified doughnuts and vulcanized chops Oysters that sleep in a watery bath. Butter as strong as Ooliah of Gath; Weary of paying for what I don't eat, Chewing up rubber and calling it meat. Backward, turn backward, for weary I am! Give me a whack at my grandmother's jam: Let me drink milk that has never been skimmed. Let me eat butter whose hair has been trimmed ; Let me but once have an old-fashioned pie, Then Til l^e willing to curl up and die. OFFICE PHONE BERKELEY 996 KESIDENCE PHONE BERKELEY 2278 O, A. RUDOLPH Lorin Station South Berkeley OSS AOGAGE IJSTEK EALniFUI. ERKELEY When you visit our town some day You will want your baggage without delay It will be delivered prompt as you may guess If you hand checks to Boyd's Express WE GIVE IT UP. The holidays have come once more The students go home again But why in thunder when they leave Is it always sure to rain? Some go home on the R. R. cars, And some by the raging main. But as quick as Boyd goes for the trunks It's always sure to rain. HK IS DEAD. The Coroner of Alameda County re- ceived the following letter yesterday, and will hold his wagon in readiness: Coroner Tisdale — In case I am found dead around the Berkeley depot will you kindly have the jury return a verdict that the deceased died from starvation while waiting for a job. JoH\ E. BovD F, I SCHILLER 3222 Adeline Street South Berkeley EAGLE TRANSFER H. IVERSEN, Propriktor Phone Berkeley 304 South Berkele3^ BARBARA FRIETCHIR The Rebs marched over the mountain wall With their noisy clatter and usual gall. Forty flags with their silver stars Forty flags with their crimson bars. Barbara Frietchie in bed and groaning lay x\nd did'nt give a cuss for the Blue or the Grey She'd been out all night to a dance and frolic And came home with a billions colic You see she ate a lo-t of jelly cake And she had an awful stomach ache [CONTINUKD ON PAGE II] 9 John R. Kiely — DEAI.ER IN — New and Second-hand Furniture, Stoves and Household Goods of All Kinds. I will buy or sell anything from a Single Piece to an Entire Household Furniture Rented for all Occasions LOOK FOR ELECTRIC SIGN 1743 Alcatraz Avenue Near Adeline Street SOUTH BERKELEY BARBARA FRIETCHIE [continued from page 9] She tied a wet rag round her head, Took j arnica ginger and went to bed When up the street come the Grey clad boys She muttered — Oh Gol Darn their noise But to Stonewall Jackson riding ahead Never a word poor Barbara said How could she when both Doctor and Nurse Said t'was 'Pendicetus or something worse. She didn't lean out of the window sill To shake the flag with a royal will Therefore the salty but well meant tear Will please stop falling on Stonwall's bier Tis forty old years since the battle was ore And Reb and Yank are friends once more Hero in Blue and hero in Grey Love to tell of that awful day When hearing the warriors battle tread Barbara Frietchie remained in bed. CLAUSEN THE TTNTJNGr All Work Strictly First Class 3127 Harper Street, Corner Woolsey LORIN STATION, BERKELEY 12 WINIFRED CAMPBEI.L. In the summer of 1901 a resident of Berkeley named McDonald went to San Francisco accompanied by his wife leav- ing his three children in care of a young girl named Winifred Campbell with strict instructions to watch over the youngest a child of three months old. How well "Winnie" obeyed instructions the fol- lowing lines will show: We are going to the city said the mother to the maid, We are going to the city but I am not afraid. To go and leave my children dear unto your watchful care, That you will do your level best to guard my children fair. I leave them to you, Winnie, while I am far away, And I pray God be with you all this pleasant happy day The older ones of course can play around the yard But 'tis my darling baby whose foot- steps you will guard. The mother kissed her darling babies and started up the street [CONTINUKD ON PAOK 1 5] G, E. HAYNES F» JOINTER DECORiVTOR PJVPERHiVNGER Estimates Cheerfully Given SHOP RKSIDKNCK 3247 Adeline St. 13 14 Alcatraz Ave Near Alcatraz Berkeley Lorin Market HENRY YOUNG, Pkop. — DKALKR TN — CHOICXE MEATS FRUITS A>sD VEGETABLES Telephone Berkeley 1155 Corner Alcatraz A\'enue and Ellis Street 14 WINIFRED CAMPBELL. [continued from page 13] Where she had promised her husband together they would meet To go unto the city to purchase house- hold ware Leaving her darling babies to Winnie Campbell's care And as they boarded the train and down the road did glide She thought of home and children dear and brave Winnie by their side And a prayer ascended to heaven, ' 'God bless my children dear Oh guard them heavenly father and I shall have no fear. ' The morning it passed swiftly away — the little maid did the w^ork With a watchful eye on baby for fear that danger near should lurk. The children played upon the grass, with joy their voices rang. And to please the little baby. Winnie to it gen 1]y sang She laid it on the bed and to it gave some milk, And the baby cried "Coo, coo, I feel as fine as silk." [continued on page 17] 15 C. N A M A N Y 6401 SHATTUCK AVENUE Corner Alcatraz Avenue — deali':r in — GROCERIES iv>^r> KITCIIEIS^ XJTEKSILB COiVL JVISTD WOOD m\.Y JVIS^D GRAllST Nammy keeps at all times a full line of Coal on hand l6 WINIFRED CAMPBELL [continued from page 15] And as 'twas getting near twelve o'clock she started the fire to burn So that luncheon might be ready when the mistress did return. The children they came running in "May I have a piece of bread," **Yes, darlings, if you are hungry" the little maiden said, *'But if you wait a moment, your mama will be here soon. For she said she'd not fail to return at the hour of noon, And then luncheon will be ready andiyou can all sit down And hear your mama tell about th-e wonders in town, And then Winnie turned and a fearful sight was seen For the walls were all ablaze from the stove of gasoline. For a moment all seemed dark and drear to the little maid Then quickly she remembered what her kind mistress said ''Watch over my darling children, I pray you, Winnie, dear, [continued on page 19] Phone Berkeley 1653 PETER BROWN Teas, Coffees, Spices, Extracts Butter and Eggs Our Specialty 1833 Harmon St. South Berkeley JOSEPH PACE BOOT AND SHOEMAKER Maker and Repairer First-class Work Done on short notice. Reasonable prices 1746 Alcatraz Ave South Berkeley C. J, DANIELSON SAW FILER All kinds of Saws filed, set and Repaired 820 Merchant Street near Grove St. or leave your saws at 1745 xMcatraz Ave 18 WINIFRED CAMPBELL [continued from page 17] And above all my darling baby, should danger hover near, For I know 'twould drive me crazy if my baby met any harm So watch over it gently, Winnie, and keep it snug and warm" No human hand was near to help the little maid, Still, "I will save the children, God helping me," she said. She quickly called them to her, pressed baby to her breast. And feeling round in the smoke, she gathered all the rest, And with them clutching to her dress while flames roared overhead. She quickly rolled the baby in a quilt from off the bed. Said "children, stick right close to me and do not be afraid. And God helping me, I'll save you," said the darino^ little maid- And as all round about the flames did roar [continued on V.XCrV, 21] ^9 Electrical and Selling, Renting Sporting Goods and Repairing THE Curtis Motorcycle has advantages over all others I^ength of wheel base, Fuel capacity, Silent running Great Strength and Power Speed and durability JOHN i^. AVILSOIS^ AGENT 1835 Harmon Street Berkeley Phone Berkeley 2383 WM. BALTZER THE LORIN PORK AND DELICATESSEN STORE All kinds of fresh, smoked and Salt Meats Sausages. Branch Bakery 3238 Adeline St. South Berkeley WINIFRED CAMPBELL [continued from page 19] Brave Winnie with the helpless ones did strive to reach the door. And as she struggled to the door while flames roared left and right And as the neighbors gathered round they saw a fearful sight, It was brave Winnie Campbell, pressing babe unto her breast While the other frightened little ones were clinging to her dress And as the neighbors praised her, quite modestly she stood, And simply made the answer, "I did the best I could." And on the Angle's book, way up in heaven so fair. You'll find the name "Winnie Camp- bell" in big letters written there. PHONE BERKELEY III MANAGER Singer and Wheeler & Wilson Sewing Machines Edison and Zon-o-phone Talking Machines Sold on Easy Pay- ments A full line of Edison and Disc Records 3219 Adeline St. South Berkeley Save Magazine Money Free 64 Page Catalogue If you order from our catalogue you absolutely assure yourself of the very lowest combination prices and a service that is a little better, a little quicker, that it is possible to receive elsewhere. Address all orders to E. M, NIELSEN 3324 Adeline St. South Berkeley California Window & House Cleaning Co. A. BIASOTT, Proprietor Windows Cleaned, Floors Scrubbed, Offices and General House Cleaning at reasonable rates. Contracts made for cleaning by week or month. We guar- antee first class work. 1356 63rd Street Oakland, Cal. Office 1747 Alactraz Ave I UN!VtK5>JI T j Listen my children, and you shall hear How Berkeley Town went dry on beer. 'Twas on December, nineteen hundred and six, The Trustees put us in a devnl of a fix They passed a bloomin' No-License law And gave Old Whisky a smack in the jaw. Up jumped Bold John Evergreen then He left his express and he left his pen He said to a friend, "Stand at the Town Hall door, And if they kill the saloons, just let a roar, And I across the street will be. Ready to 'screw my nut' to West Ber- k-el-ey. ril spread the news from point to point, From Brum' s corner to Fishers' point Soon a shout was heard from the Town Hall door And Evergreen waited to hear no more, His footsteps were heard both near and far As he skiddoed quick to the Avenue car. [CONTINUICD 0\ V.\C,r. 25] Let Us Make Your Trousers ^ A standard of | ^ -^^ merit seldom o^ 8 equalled, never ^ y excelled and at ^ t) less money than O ^ you pay for it S ^ anywhere else. ^ ^ Everything 9^ S guaranteed. ^ Chas* A* Meyer THK TAILOR 1740 \Uti\x^f. ^-pr ^eoe/oe/oe/Qe^e^e^ TKL. BERKELEY II57 ESTABLISHED I Real Estate Brokers, Loans & Insurance W. C. Moran, Notary Public A. A. Quakenbush South Berkeley 24 EVERGREEN'S RIDE. [continued from page 23] A nickel he paid on the electric car And startled the "soaks" at Landre- gan's bar As he shouted loud in a voice of sorrow "Fill up to-night — you'll get none to- morrow , ' ' The crowd took the hint: filled bottle and pail, And swore the law would not avail To prevent a drink for New Year's day No matter what the Gazette might say. So the crowd filled up on beer and gin And the booze soon disappeared like sin They swore the Trustees were a set of cranks, And tendered Evergreen a vote of thanks. Hurrah! Hurrah! for our hero bold! Whose name shall shine in letters of gold. And when on high the roll is seen. You'll find the name, John Evergreen. 25 Phone Oakland 6825 JOHN PANELLA Suits Made to Order Suit Cleaning Dyeing and Pressing 513 Eleventh St. Oakland, Cal. Between. Washington and Clay vSts. Phone Oakland 6863 Family Liquor Store LANDREGAN & WHITE, Props. WHOLESALE AND RETAIL All Orders Promptly Delivered 6ist and Adeline Sts. Oakland, Cal. 26 W. R. C. SUPPER. A .mouse nearly caused a riot last evening at a dinner given by the Women's Relief Corps of Berkeley in honor of the Civil War Veterans. According to re- port, the mouse lost its bearings and was too bewildered to find his way out of the hall to the great distress of the ladies, who sought every available elevation — chairs, tables and window sills. John Boyd it was who killed the mouse and saved several ladies from severe palpita- tion of the heart. The story is best told in BoN^d's own words: "I heard of the chicken dinner given by the W. R. C. to the vets of the Civil War, and as chicken is a total stranger at the Evergreen home, I determined to 'butt in.' When I stepped up to the door of the banquet room k lady stopped me and said: 'None but veterans can enter in.' 'Quite right,' said I, 'none but us fellows who fought in the Civil War should enter.' 'Why,' said the fair one 'are you a veteran? You look to young and handsome.' I blushed but assured the lady that I had taken a very [CONTIXUKD ON PAGE 29] 27 WHY PAY RENT When you can buy j^our own Home on Installments. We have to-day and every day Special Bargains. So here you are does this catch your eye? $3000 — 5 Rooms and Bath. High base- ment. A garden of flowers and fruit. Lovely summer arbor and east of Adeline. Half a block to station. South front. Lot 40x107. $1000 cash and balance $25 per month. $3,600 — Modern 6 room 2 story house just finished. $400 cash, balance $35 per month. On Dover Street east of Grove street. SPECIALS IN LOTS AT ALL TIMES $650 — On Harmon Street. South front 37x103. $700 — On Woolsey Street. 25x100 and street work complete. $1000 — On Prince Street. Street work complete. Your own terms on these lots. Call and see F. W, HAINES J837 Harmon St» Lorin^ South Berkeley 28 W. R. C. SUPPER. [continued from page 27] prominent part in the desperate battle of Porkandbeans, and led the troops at the bloody engagement of Zobsconce, and she would find the name of Evergreen in the new United States history soon to be published. She invited me to enter. I did and took my place at the table, where I had a huge chicken pie on my starboard bow, and a plate of sandwiches on my port quarter. I had only got away with seven platefuls when there was a great commolion at th-e other end of the hall, and a shriek of anguish. A yell of despair rang loud and long from each feamale's throat. For a moment all was confusion and a scene of horror long to be remembered. But Post Commander Boyd with great presence of mind or- dered the drummer to beat the 'long roll' and as the old vets fell in the comman- der ordered Junior Vice Gilbert to take commandj while he hastened to she tele- phone and called up Chief Vollmer. In the meantime all was confusion and [COXTIXUKD ON PAGp: 31] 29 W* T* Bradshaw & Co* DEALERS IN GROCERIES, FRUITS, CANDIES, AND CIGARS Orders Delivered Promptly Phone Berkeley 294 6401 TELEGRAPH AVENUE OAKLAND, CAL. W. P. GRACE REAL ESTATE AND INSURANCE OFFICE Alcatraz and Telegraph Avenues Phone Berkeley 294 RESIDENCE 6504 Raymond Street Phone Berkeley 417 30 W. R. C. SUPPER. [continued from page 29] alarm. The terror-stricken fair ones climbed tables and chairs in a most un- dignified fashion. At last the mouse was struck dead, not by apoplexy, but by a big stick in the hands of myself. And all was quite along the Potomac." The W. R. C. gave a supper last night. That made the 'vets all beam with de- light; The courses were many, the tables piled high, The ''piece de resistance" was chicken pot pie. All stood at their chairs while the chap- lain said prayer, Requesting the Lord to bless all who were there. "Oh Lord, have mercy on every old sinner Who came here to-night to eat chicken dinner' ' [continued ov page 33] Caroline Anderson) Anna Anderson )Prop6. GO TO THE LORIN CAFE For Home Cooking and Delicatessen Meals at Regular Hours 1735 ALCATRAZ AVENUE If You Need Base Ball, Tennis Goods or FISHING TACKLE Go to the Berkeley Gun Store 2074 1-2 University Ave Berkeley C. P. Johnson G. W. Johnson Johnson^s Market Wholesale and Retail Dealers In Fruits, Vegetables, Produce and Poultry Fish and Oysters 3226 Adeline St. South Berkeley Phone Berkeley 2274 W. R. C. SUPPER. [continued from page 31] But a noise soon was heard from the rear of the hall ^'There's a horrid old mouse!" some female did bawl. All the ladies there present grabbed hold of their clothes, And jumped on the tables with a chorus of "Ohs." The long roll was then sounded, the soldiers fell in, Determined to fight and determined to win ; And each veteran said he was ready to die In defense of the ladies and that chicken pot-pie. Our noble commander raised high a big stick And hit that mouse a terrible lick. The ladies were saved and no longer annoyed — The mouse liad been killed — they were rescued bv Bovd. JOHN EVERORKKN ROYD Mother may I go down the beacli? Yes my darling Mag, If you've mislaid your bathin^r suit, Why wrap yourself in a rag. THE DEVIL AND HIS IMPS Old Belzibub sat in his cosy chair Watching the sinners whogathered there From every city and every cline They flocked to H — most all the time But one thing I do not understand And I want to say it beats the band But 'tis a fact as sure as fate Few Berkele}^ people enter the gate They are moral I know but its my desire That they get a taste of burning fire Some plan I must sureh^ devise To coax them down and blind their ej^es To lead them to deserved sin and strife And show them the joys of a simple life I'll give a prize to the Imp who invents Some plan to rob them of common sense To make them wicked I do aspire And lead them straight to H — s hot fire One little Imp fell upon his knees And shouted Master, if you please You'll make them wicked good and square - If you'll only locate the Capitol there Old Belzibub jumped on his feet And cried with joy, they are my meat The Capitol came, the devil content [continued on page 37] 34 riione Berkeley 3009 M, WEISS TAILOR Suits Made to Order Cleaning, Press- ing and Dyeing Will Call for and Deliver Goods 6526 Telegraph Ave Oakland, Cal. OWL cafe" BILL HENDERSON, Prop. MEALS AT ALL HOURS Ferrier & Brock Building Up Stairs Shattuck Avenue near Center Street The Greatest Medicine of the Age R ADAM'S Microbe Killer Company p. Castleman, Manager 3009 Adeline St. Ashby Station Berkeley, Cal. 35 GO TO Thos- Taylor n2l ALCATRAZ AVE For a good 1907 Model Bicycle, carries the following He SNELIv, READING STANDARD, and PIERCE BICYCLES All kinds of repair work done including Vulcanizing, Brazing, Etc. F. G. DEA.RING, Prop. Frank^s Barber Shop For a Neat Hair Cut or iVrtistic Shave Children's Hair Cutting a Specialty Agency Oakland Laundry 492 Alcatraz Ave Corner Telegraph Oakland, Cal. TRADE MARK Read this book all through and come to the Star Theater and receive one free. 36 THE DEVIL AND HIS IMPS And Berkeley people were soon H — bent The Students were led into vice and sin And Satan prepared to gather them in Then down came Temples of Learning and Fame And "Blind Pigs" were built and Houses of shame The "Push" came over too inspect And Berkeley went to the devil direct H, D, IRWIN Member Berkeley Real Estate Exchange NOTARY PUBLIC INSURANCE AGKiMT FOR Berkeley, Claremont and Oakland Real Estate 3264 Adeline Street, Lorin Station Phone Berkeley 1107 2033 Shattuck Ave, Berkeley Phone Berkeley34i3 37 THE STRANGER Day after day the R. R. Agents, Baggage and Transfer men around Berkeley station are approached by strangers and the question asked, "Where is there a saloon around here." Thirsty mortals have harrassed the expressmen so much with the question "Where can I get a drink" that one Baggage Smasher was driven "Nutty" and in his delerium wrote the following lines (He will be examined before the Lunacy Commission.) A stranger stopped at my wagon today He paused for a moment and then did say Is there any saloon in this 'ere town I can't find one after looking around I answered quickly No Sir E Tlieres no saloon or drinkeree The strangers face with anguish fell As he quickly muttered that is H — No place in town too get firey liquor To muddle your brain P. D. Q. quicker No place in town for the "Rum Fiend" to dwell Well the stranger was right and this is H— 38 Well come to think the man was right There's no disturbance and no fight If saloons were here and liquor to sell The Police would say well this is H — Gus Vollmer would feel of course de- jected And wouldn't give a cuss to be elected But the Police Court with fines would swell And the drunk would say $5 gone to H— Well no doubt it would be nice To have rum sold in Paradise But as for me the truth I'll tell I'll jump Paradise and live in H — Phone Berkeley 2204 LORIN EXPRESS BERKELEY AND OAKLAND Orders Promptly Attended To Leave Orders at Dixon's Cigar Stand E. M. Raines, Prop. 1632 Harmon St. When In A Hurry Call Up Quick Delivery Dyeing & Cleaning Co^ Calls Promptly Picked Up by Wagon Phone Berkeley 1057 3245 Adeline Street. Berkeley 39 ©IGJ-NS D. McKENZIE PRACTICAL PAINTER AND DECORATOR By Day or Contract 1745 Alcatraz Ave South Berkeley Phone Berkeley 2254 R. REESE Saw Filing, Key Fitting Gun Repairing 1 72 1 Alcatraz Ave South Berkeley Phone Berkeley 1155 O. KATO Pianos, Furniture, and Baggage Stand Weimann's Corner Alcatraz and Adeline 40 W. J. AHRENS FLXJMBINQ GrJLS FITTI]Sra Estimates Cheerfully Given Satisfaction Guaranteed 20 1 o Ashby Ave Berkeley, Cal. 41 JAPAN'S PROMISE. We are coming, Mr. School Trustee, about seventy-five or eighty more; We are coming, dear directors, from Japan's pagan shore — We are coming to gay Berkeley, a town upon the bay, Where a poor Jap gets free schooling for which the people pay. Why your people are such greenies, we we don't quite understand. As to give free education to the Japs from Japan land; To pay all the taxes, cause them to toil with might and main, And it looks as if the Yankees had these poor Japs on the brain. But don't worry, Berkeley people, for we will fill your schools, 42 And be thankful to our idols that the Yankees are such fools. All we want is a job washing dishes night and morn x\nd if your short on taxes — why put your watch in pawn? Praise the Gods we struck a land where the people are such fools As to give to us, smart Japies, the free- dom of their schools. The people they may kick when they come to pay the tax, But if we wash their dishes what more can they ax? So now good Berkeley people, keep your public schools a going. [CONTINUKD ON PAGE 45] 43 C. H. MOLTER NIP AND TUCK PEANUT AND POP CORN MAN A fine line of Chocolates and Candies Chewing Gum, Lead Pencils and Tablets. Daily Papers. Don't Forget to Order for Your Parties Stand corner Alcatraz and Adeline Sts. Residence, 1741 Alcatraz Berkeley 44 JAPAN'S PROMISE. [continued from page 43] And our jolly Japanese boys will fill them to overflowing; And if there is no room for the children of your race Why let them stay at home and we will take their place. Written by the cute little Jap who at- tends the Berkeley school. Mother may I go down to the beach? Yes, my darling Addie, But if you get your tootsies wet ril spank your little paddie. 45 J. R. KIELY Dealer In Nev/ and Second-Hand FURNITURE Stoves, Tin and Enamel ware San Pablo Ave and Felton Street Stege, Cal. 46 CONCLUSION. In conclusion, let me express the hope that my readers may feel as much pleasure in perusing this little gem as my printers did when I planked down the cash to pay for the printing. To be sure. I had formed a plan to ''stand them off." But the other night, when I had retired to my virtuous couch, and while sleeping in childish innocence, I had a fearful dream. In my dream, a figure with cloven hoofs and horns on his head appeared at my bedside. In his hand he held a copy of this book and opening it read as follows: I am sorry to say, sad is your case, You'll go way back to the other place; On such sad doings we must frown As swindling the people of Berkeley town But one thing in your favor I will say You did not for^^^et your printer to pay; And you certainly did have lots of fun While your silly book never hurt anyone I have often heard of the printers' devil, but if the fellow I was in my dream is a sample of their collecting agent I'll "ante up" without a visit from the party of the first t>nrt. Ins heirs, assigns, or any of his relatives. J. EDWARD BOYD, B. B. B. Phone Berkeley 1653 South Berkeley Tea Store PETER BROWN, Prop. Teas, Coffees, Spices Extracts. Butter, P^ggs and Cheese A Full Line of Bread, Pies, and Cake 3273 Adeline Street Berkeley GO TO THE EAGJ^LE PRESS FOR YOUR BOOK i^N33 JOB PRI^TIlsrG 1745 ALCATRAZ AVENUE UNIVEESITY OF CALIFORNIA LIBRARY, BERKELEY THIS BOOK IS DUE ON THE LAST DATE STAMPED BELOW Books not returned on time are subject to a fine of 50c per volume after the third day overdue, increasing to $1.00 per volume after the sixth day. Books not in demand may be renewed if application is made before expiration of loan period. MAY- 4 m^ ,3Ju!'53f1 Jl JUL 10 W DEC 4 2003 U. C. BERKELEY LlBRARjES