DISRAELI THE GEORGE E. LASK COLLECl DISRAELI A PLAY BY LOUIS N. PARKER AUTHOR OP " POMANDER WALK " AND " THE CARDINAI NEW YORK JOHN LANE COMPANY MCMXVIII Copyright, 1911, by JOHN LANE COMPANY TO GEORGE ARLISS IN FRIENDSHIP AND ADMIRATION 2013900 ENDORSED BY THE DRAMA LEAGUE OF AMERICA NOTE This is not an historical play, but only an attempt to show a picture of the days not so very long ago in which Disraeli lived, and some of the racial, social, and political prejudices he fought against and conquered. " Disraeli " was first produced at the Princess Theatre, Montreal, under the management of Messr?. Liebler and Co., on Monday evening, January 23, 1911, with the following cast : The Duke of Glastonbury .... CHARLES CAREY The Duchess of Glastonbury . . . LEILA REPTON Clarissa, Lady Pevensey .... ELSIE LESLIE Charles, Viscount Deeford .... COURTENAY FOOTE Adolphus, Viscount Cudworth . . GEOFFREY DOUGLAS Lady Cudworth CONSTANCE KIRKHAM Lord Brooke of Brookehill . . . GUY CUNNINGHAM Lady Brooke JOSEPHINE BERNHARDT The Rt. Hon. Benjamin Disraeli . GEORGE ARLISS Lady Beaconsfield MARGUERITE ST. JOHN Mrs. Noel Travers MARGARET DALE Sir Michael Probert, Bart. . . . DAVID TORRANCE Mr. Hugh Meyers J. L. MACKAY Mr. Lumley Foljambe ALEXANDER CALVERT Mr. Tearle, Disraeli's Secretary . . DUDLEY DIGGES Butler at Glastonbury Towers . . HARRY CHESSMAN Footman at Glastonbury Towers . RUTHERFORD HERMAN Bascot, Disraeli's Butler DOUGLAS Ross Potter, Disraeli's Gardener . . . ST. CLAIR BAYFIELD Flooks, a Rural Postman .... WILFRID SEAGRAM NOTE (Continued) The play was then transferred, by way of Detroit, Toledo, and Columbus, to the Grand Opera House, Chicago, where it ran from February 13 to April 29, 1911. It was first produced in New York, at Wallack's Theatre, on Monday evening, September 18, 1911, with the following cast : The Duke of Glastonbury .... CHARLES CARET The Duchess of Glastonbury . . . LEILA REPTON Clarissa, Lady Pevensey .... ELSIE LESLIE Charles, Viscount Deeford .... IAN MACLAREN Adolphus, Viscount Cudworth . . J. R. TORRENS Lady Cudworth FRANCES REEVE Lord Brooke of Brookehiil . . . GUT CUNNINGHAM Lady Brooke MARIE R. QUINN The Rt. Hon. Benjamin Disraeli . GEORGE ARLISS Lady Beaconsfield MARGUERITE ST. JOHN Mrs. Noel Travers MARGARET DALE Sir Michael Probert, Bart. . . . HERBERT STANDING Mr. Hugh Meyers OSCAR ADYE Mr. Lumley Foljambe ALEXANDER CALVERT Mr. Tearle, Disraeli's Secretary . . DUDLEY DIGGES Butler at Glastonbury Towers . . HARRY CHESSMAN Footman at Glastonbury Towers . RUTHERFORD HERMAN Bascot, Disraeli's Butler .... DOUGLAS Ross Potter, Disraeli's Gardener ... ST. CLAIR BAYFIELD Flooks, a Rural Postman . . . . W. MAYNE LYNTON To all the Ladies and Gentlemen of both these admirable casts, and to the Management, which gave me a free hand in producing the play, I herewith offer my sincere thanks. L. N. P. DISRAELI THE CHARACTERS IN THE PLAY THE DUKE OF GLASTONBUBY THE DUCHESS OF GLASTONBUBT CLARISSA, LADY PEVENSET CHARLES, VISCOUNT DEEFORD ADOLPHUS, VISCOUNT CUDWORTH LADY CUDWORTH LORD BROOKE OF BROOKEHILL LADY BROOKE THE RT. HON. BENJAMIN DISRAELI, M. P. LADY BEACONSFIELD MRS. NOEL TRAVERS SIR MICHAEL PROBERT, BART. MR. HUGH MEYERS MR. LUMLEY FOLJAMBE MR. TEARLE BUTLER AT GLASTONBURY TOWEBS BASCOT, DISRAELI'S BUTLER POTTER, DISRAELI'S GARDENER FLOORS, A RURAL POSTMAN A FOOTMAN DIPLOMATS; ENGLISH AND FOREIGN NAVAL AND MOJTABT OFFICERS; LORDS AND LADIES; LIVERIED SERVANTS; ETC., ETC. DISRAELI ACT I SCENE At Glastonbury Towers The octagonal room at Glastonbury Towers. It is a small room between the breakfast room on the left, and one of the drawing-rooms on the right. Large folding doors lead to each. CHARLES and the DUKE are seen through the doors on the left, seated at the breakfast table in conversation. The room is richly furnished. At the back two large French windows open into the gardens. Through them one end of a croquet lawn is visible. A small casement of the centre window is open. [The large doors on the right and left are closed when the curtain rises. The babble of conversation in [the breakfast room is heard. The doors R. are thrown open and a FOOTMAN, bearing a copy of the "Times" on a salver, enters. He puts it on a small table. At that moment the doors left are thrown open by the BUTLER, and enter the DUCHESS, followed by LADY CUDWORTH and LORD CUDWORTH; also LORD BROOKE, who re- mains on the left reading paper] [The DUCHESS is at work on an elaborate piece of embroidery, a copy of Landseer's "Dignity and Impu- dence" in violent wools. The other characters wander listlessly in and out some carrying very small croquet mallets] DISRAELI ADOLPHTTS [Following LADY CTJDWOBTH and the DUCHESS] And are we going to Balmoral this autumn, Duchess? DUCHESS [Sitting on ottoman] The dear Queen has expressed a wish that we should come in October. [The FOOTMAN bows to DUCHESS, and exit left door] LADY CUDWOBTH. Oh, Dolly, I shall want a thou- sand pounds for gowns. ADOLPHUS. A thousand pounds? I 'm sorry I spoke. BROOKE [Reading] Oh, I say ! Blondin 's dancing the tight wope at the Cwystal Palath again. LADY CUDWORTH [Laughing] Oh, he's sure to break his neck. BROOKE. Well, he gets a thousand pounds for it evewy time. ADOLPHUS. Wish I was Blondin. DUCHESS. For shame! Ermyntrude, your back! LADY CUDWORTH. Yes, mamma. [Stiffens herself] [Enter LADY BROOKE from the drawing-room on the right] LADY BROOKE [Coming behind ottoman and kissing the DUCHESS] Good morning, mamma. Has every- body finished breakfast? DUCHESS. 7 have. Your father is still eating or talking. LADY BROOKE. Here he conies, mamma, with Deeford. DUCHESS. Talking. It had to be one or the other. [LORD DEEFORD and the DUKE enter from the breakfast room] CHARLES. Tfes! I shall build model cottages. After all, a happy peasantry is the backbone of England. 12 DISRAELI DUKE. D' ye know what yer happy peasantry '11 do, Deeford? They '11 sell yer drain pipes for old lead; use yer staircase for fire-wood and keep pigs in yer pantry. CHARLES. Then I shall turn them out. DUKE. Ay and be held up to public execration as a harsh landlord. DUCHESS. The lower orders do not appreciate comfort. Hildegarde, a cushion! [LADY BROOKE arranges a cushion for her] LADY BROOKE. Mamma, do you think Deeford will speak to Clarissa to-day? DUCHESS. Hildegarde! He has not approached me, yet! LADY CUDWORTH. Will she accept him? DUCHESS. Of course. LADY BROOKE. Oh, I don't know. She's so funny. DUCHESS. I trust no child of mine was ever funny. LADY CUDWORTH [Coming down languidly to R. of DUCHESS] Does anyone know how Lady Beacons- field is this morning? DUCHESS. I sent Mrs. Travers to inquire. I have no doubt she is quite well. LADY CUDWORTH. Then I sha'n't have to go up and see her. So glad hate climbing stairs. LADY BROOKE. So horrid of her to faint, just as I was weading aloud! BROOKE. Oh, I don't know it did stop you! DUCHESS [Peremptorily] Brooke! [Enter MRS. TRAVERS, a charming and very smart young woman, from the drawing-room on the right. She has a fan in her hand] MRS. . TRAVERS [Gushingly, to everybody] Good morning good morning! [Everybody responds; par- 13 DISRAELI ticularly the DUKE, who then sits L. of table and reads] DUCHESS. Ah! I was just talking about you, Mrs. Travers. How is er Mr. Disraeli's wife? Quite well, I'm sure. MRS. TRAVERS. Lady Beaconsfield says she is much better this morning. DUCHESS. Quite well. I said so. MRS. TRAVERS. Dear Duchess! So sympathetic! Already at your artistic work! DUCHESS. It helps me to think. MRS. TRAVERS [Admiringly] Oh! And what do you think of? DUCHESS [Innocently] Nothing. MRS. TRAVERS. Your mind must be fully oc- cupied [The DUCHESS looks up] with so many guests. DUCHESS. Why, we have only our two elder girls and their husbands, Charles Viscount Deeford, you know and Sir Michael Probert. MRS. TRAVERS. The Governor of the Bank of England! You have forgotten Mr. Disraeli and his wife. [.4 FOOTMAN enters from breakfast room with two letters on a salver. LADY CUDWORTH takes a letter. He brings the other to MRS. TRAVERS] DUCHESS [Acidly] They are not my friends. DUKE [Warningly] Belinda they are our guests. DUCHESS. Yes. I cannot help wondering why. ADOLPHUS [To MRS. TRAVERS] Been for a walk this morning? MRS. TRAVERS [Taking letter from FOOTMAN and turning to CUDWORTH] Yes. Every morning. 14 DISRAELI ADOLPHUS. How awful! [Turns up stage and joins LADY CUDWOHTH] MBS. TRAVEBS. I have not seen Sir Michael Pro- bert yet. DUCHESS. He only arrived late last night. He had breakfast in his rooms, and now he is busy with his correspondence. CHARLES. Duchess, are we not to see Lady Clarissa this morning? DUCHESS. Has Clarissa not breakfasted? LADY CUDWORTH. Oh, she had a cup of tea at eight o'clock and went for a walk in the home-park with Mr. Disraeli. [CHARLES shows annoyance, which the DUCHESS observes] CHARLES. And Mrs. Disraeli I beg pardon I should say, Lady Beaconsfield ? MRS. TRAVERS [Smiling maliciously] Lady Beacons- field is not down yet. [CHARLES catches MRS. TRAV- ERS' eye and again shows annoyance] DUCHESS [Hastily] It is not unusual. Clarissa likes these early walks. When we are alone, she goes to the vicarage and back every morning. CHARLES. Two miles! How strenuous! DUCHESS. She reads Greek with the Vicar. [The BROOKES are seen on the lawn playing croquet] CHARLES. I am not sure that a young lady should read Greek. LADY CUDWORTH. Will you play cwoquet, Deeford? CHARLES. I am ah averse to violent exercise at such a matutinal hour. MRS. TRAVERS. So like my poor dear husband. DUCHESS. How is your husband, Agatha? MRS. TRAVERS [Alluding to the letter she is reading] 15 DISRAELI Noel? Oh, just the same. He writes he is moving from Carlsbad to Kissingen. CHARLES. When do you expect to see him? When will he be in town? MRS. TRAVERS. Never. He wanders from one watering-place to another. CHARLES. I trust he derives benefit MRS. TRAVERS. None whatever. All the waters disagree with him. He develops new symptoms every- where, and has to go somewhere else to change them. I ought to be with him now [Rising] but we are so dreadfully poor CHARLES. Oh, come! Those exquisite diamonds last night DUKE [Stirring uncomfortably behind his newspaper] Ha hum! MRS. TRAVERS. Heirlooms. We are poor, but we have ancestors. Ah! You are looking at my frock. You don't know what shifts a poor little woman is driven to. This cost me nothing. Worth knows what circles I move in, and considers me his best advertise- ment. [With an appealing glance at the DUCHESS] There! Now you despise me. DUCHESS. Nonsense, Agatha There's nothing to be ashamed of in having a good figure. DUKE. Heah ! Heah ! MRS. TRAVERS. Oh, Duchess, you are always so kind. You know how poor I am. DUCHESS. Poor dear thing, yes. MRS. TRAVERS. But one has one's position to keep up; and one must look nice. DUKE. You do. You do. Charmin'. Char [Catches the DUCHESS'S eye and collapses behind his paper} hum! 16 DISRAELI [Enter the BUTLER, with telegrams on a salver. He, looks about him, evidently in search of someone] DUCHESS. For me? BUTLER. Telegrams for Mr. Disraeli, your Grace. DUCHESS [Acidly] He is not here. BUTLER [Helplessly] No, your Grace. [He stands irresolute] MRS. TRAVERS [Eagerly; on the point of taking the telegrams] I think I could find him! DUCHESS [Sharply] Certainly not, Agatha! [To the BUTLER] That will do. [Exit BUTLER] DUCHESS. Dispatches, messages, telegrams! One has no peace, with that man in the house! DUKE. Come, come, Belinda! [LADY BROOKE has been seen with BROOKE on the lawn outside. She is reading to him. They enter through the window. He is bored to death] LADY BROOKE. I know not what I was playing Or what I was dreaming then, But I struck one chord of music Like the sound of a great Amen. [The DUKE rises irritably] BROOKE. Oh, I say! That's stunning! [He moves away] DUCHESS [Severely] Hildegarde, I hope that is not Tennyson! [MRS. TRAVERS rises to hide her laughter and join* the DUKE] LADY BROOKE. Oh, no, mamma! It's dear Ad laide Anne Procter. 17 DISRAELI CHARLES [Booming] Surely, the Idyls of the King is the greatest poem ever written! DUCHESS [Stiffly] I have not read it. I do not allow my daughters to read it. LADY CUD WORTH AND LADY BROOKE [Together; demurely] No, mamma. DUKE [Aside to MRS. TRAVERS] Belinda 's not to be trifled with what? Purity of the home eh? MRS. TRAVERS. Ah there's no place like home. DUKE. Thank God! MRS. TRAVERS. Hush! Naughty! LADY CUD WORTH [To the DUCHESS; very innocently] How papa does admire a pretty face! DUCHESS [To CHARLES] Charles, take Mrs. Trav- ers into the garden. You may meet Clarissa. CHARLES. I want very much to speak to you, Duchess. DUCHESS. Well ? CHARLES. Alone, if it were possible. DUCHESS. Oh! [Looks meaningly ai LU*DY CUD- WORTH] Well, come back in a few minutes. CHARLES. Thank you. [To MRS. TRAVERS] Will you come? [Booms] I will tell you about my scheme for model cottages. [MRS. TRAVERS rises and joins him] MRS. TRAVERS. Oh, how absorbing! [They go out, through the window, and are seen on the lawn] DUKE [After a pause; swinging his chair round and putting down his paper} Belinda, I should be grate- ful if you would not speak of Mr. Disraeli as you do. I have told you I invited him for political reasons. 18 DISRAELI DUCHESS [Engrosaed in her embroidery] I believe a Mr. Joseph Arch an estimable agricultural laborer is agitating in Somersetshire. Do you propose to invite him for political reasons? DUKE [Rising] 'Tsha! You are vexatious! As if there could be any comparison! DUCHESS. I grant it would be all in Mr. Arch's favor. Arch is a good Saxon name. I should not be surprised if he could trace his ancestry much farther back than yours [DuKE turns his back impatiently] Moreover, he is a Christian. DUKE [Turning to her quickly] So is DUCHESS [Deliberately] Benjamin Disraeli? It does not sound probable. DUKE [Flustered] He is the brains of the party. DUCHESS. Brains do not give birth. DUKE. He has achieved a high position. DUCHESS. By wearing satin waistcoats and marry- ing an old woman for her money! DUKE [Coming down] Belinda! Yer not going to say anything against Lady Beaconsfield? DUCHESS. Only one thing. DUKE. What? DUCHESS. She married Disraeli. DUKE. Belinda! [Seeing BUTLER who has come on with another telegram] I I have no patience. [Exit into garden] DUCHESS [To BUTLER] Yes? BUTLER. Mr. Disraeli, your Grace. DUCHESS. More telegrams? BUTLER. And there 's a newspaper person in the 'all askin' for 'im. DUCHESS. I have told you! Mr. Disraeli is not in. [Exit BUTLER] 19 DISRAELI [The DUCHESS rises impatiently. Enter CHARLES from the garden] CHARLES. Are you alone? DUCHESS. Yes. But I am out of temper. CHARLES. Oh, Duchess! DUCHESS. That Mr. Disraeli! He turns our house into a public thoroughfare, and now there 's a news- paper person in the hall! CHARLES. Shall I dismiss the ah newspaper person? DUCHESS. No, no! [Sits] What have you done with Agatha? CHARLES. When the Duke joined us, I thought I might slip away. DUCHESS [Smiling in anticipation] Well, now, Charles, what is it? CHARLES. I think you can guess. DUCHESS. Perhaps. But assume I cannot. CHARLES. When I accepted your delightful invi- tation, I did so with a purpose. DUCHESS. Yes? CHARLES. I have been thinking very seriously lately, Duchess; and I have concluded that it is my duty to get married. DUCHESS. How old are you? CHARLES. Twenty-five. But I am thinking of my wife more than of myself. She will have to face heavy responsibilities in the near future. DUCHESS. Surely, your father is in good health? CHARLES. Excellent; but his habit of life does not encourage the hope of extreme longevity. Briefly, I ask permission to pay my respectful addresses to Lady Fevensey. May I hope you and the Duke will grant it? 20 DISRAELI DUCHESS. If I grant it, the Duke will. But Clarissa is barely twenty. CHARLES. I shall have all the better chance of moulding her. DUCHESS. She is very high-spirited. She displays a note of originality. She takes no interest in em- broidery, for instance. She gave up her music lessons with Arabella Goddard. And what reason do you think she offered? She said she was too musical, and Arabella Goddard was not musical enough! CHARLES [With amused superiority] These amiable eccentricities do not alarm me. Remember, she will be constantly in my society. DUCHESS [Quite simply] Yes; that ought to sober her. CHARLES. May I take it, then, that you graciously consent? DUCHESS. Joyfully, Charles; joyfully! I shall be very happy to hear she has accepted you. CHARLES. You shall hear that to-day! [He takes her hands and kisses them formally, then he rises and bows] Thank you! Thank you! [Enter through the window, the DUKE and LADY BEACONSFIELD, followed by MRS. TRAVERS] DUKE [Coming down apprehensively] Here is Lady Beaconsfield, Belinda. DUCHESS [Coldly] Ah good morning. LADY BEACONSFIELD [Very genially] Good morn- ing, Duchess. DUCHESS. I am glad to hear you are much better. LADY BEACONSFIELD. Thank you. I am looking for my scapegrace husband. 21 DISRAELI DUCHESS. I believe he is in the home-park with Clarissa. LADY BEACONSFIELD. There never was a man with such an instinct for youth and beauty. DUCHESS [With raised eyebrows] Indeed? LADY BEACONSFIELD [Laughing] I know what you mean by "indeed." You wonder why the instinct failed him when he married me. DUCHESS. I assure you ! LADY BEACONSFIELD. Oh, I don't mind in the least. [With enthusiasm] The greatest man in the world is my husband, and I don't really care how or why. DUCHESS [Drily] Very right and proper. r LADY BEACONSFIELD. Has Sir Michael Probert been seen this morning? I know Dizzy is anxious to meet him. [MRS. TRAVERS listens interestedly. LORD and LADY BROOKE come in from the garden] DUCHESS [Icily] The Governor of the Bank of England is naturally much occupied, even in the vacation. LADY BEACONSFIELD [Simply] So is the Prime Minister; especially when he seems to be playing. MRS. TRAVERS. The Governor of the Bank of England! Oh! if he'd give me the run of his cellars for five minutes! [LORD and LADY CUDWORTH come in] DUKE [Chuckling; to her and tapping her with her fan, with which he has been, playing] I know you could make him ha-ha-ha! X know you could! You have only to flirt your fan at him! 22 DISRAELI DUCHESS [Shocked] Duke! Agatha! starts, and goes to LADY BEACONSFIELD] MBS. TRAVEKS [Sitting beside the DUCHESS] Oh, dear Duchess, that was only a joke. DUCHESS. I do not care for that sort of joke. CHARLES [Ponderously] I fear the run of the cellars would not be of much use to you. The num- bers of the notes are known, and MRS. TRAVERS [Rising and going to him, demurely] Yes. You don't like jokes either, do you? CHARLES [Posing] Humour is of several kinds. We Oxford men have a humour of our own. [Enter CLARISSA from the garden, loaded with flowers. She comes in with a rush] CLARISSA. Good morning, everybody! CHARLES. Lady Pevensey! MRS. TRAVERS. Clarissa! [Together] DUCHESS. My dear child! CLARISSA [Tossing the flowers aside, and coming to her mother] Oh, mother! I'm so excited! DUCHESS. I wish I could persuade you never to be excited. CLARISSA. Then you should n't have the greatest man in the world to stay here. [CHARLES shows annoyance] LADY BEACONSFIELD. There! She calls him the greatest man in the world, too! CLARISSA [Coming to her, and taking both her hands] Oh, you happy woman! Always to be with him! To be the first to know his thoughts! Oh, you happy woman! LADY BEACONSFIELD [Kissing her] That's what I keep on saying, my dear. 23 DISRAELI CLARISSA. He transforms everything he touches. fie even turns the landscape into fairyland. A prim- rose by a river's brim is not merely a yellow primrose to him, but the text for beautiful fancies. CHARLES [Booming] It is an open question whether a statesman should indulge in fancies! [CLARISSA gives him a look which ought to warn him he is ^treading on dangerous ground. But he is too absorbed in his own righteousness to notice it] DUKE [Absent-mindedly looking at paper. To CLARISSA] But come, come! What have you done with Dizzy? [To LADY BEACONSFIELD] Hum! I beg your pardon! LADY BEACONSFIELD. You need n't. I call him Dizzy because I love him. The world calls him Dizzy because it loves him. That nickname is nobler than a peerage. DUKE. Ah ! I won't apologize again. Where is he? CLARISSA. He's gone to feed the peacocks. LADY BEACONSFIELD [Laughing] Oh! Peacocks and swans! he positively dotes on them! Hughenden is quite over-run with them. ADOLPHUS. Extraordinary personality, Mr. Dis- raeli's. Sort of man you feel come into a room, even if you don't see him. CHARLES [Crossly] That's nonsense, Dolly. BROOKE. Wubbish, Dolly! Nobody takes any no- tice when 7 come into the woom! MRS. TRAVERS. I 'm yearning to hear him speak. DUCHESS. Why, Agatha? MRS. TRAVERS. Everybody tells me he says such wonderful things. 84' DISRAELI CLARISSA [Enthusiastically] So he does. Wonder- ful and beautiful. [DISRAELI enters from the garden, carrying a small bunch of flowers] DISRAELI. Duchess, your peacocks are moulting. They want more food and less water. DUCHESS. I do not attend to animals. DISRAELI. Then I fear you miss a great deal of pathetic affection. [Then, to the others] Good morning, Mary Good morning Duke Ah, Mrs. Travers? MRS. TRAVERS [Smiling] Did you have a pleasant walk with Clarissa? DISRAELI. Delightful. Winter, hand in hand with Spring. Innocence, with CHARLES [Sarcastically] Guile ? DISRAELI. Experience. Same thing. MRS. TRAVERS. And those charming flowers ? DISRAELI [To LADY BEACONSFIELD] Mary, my dear; your morning tribute! [He hands her the flowers, and then kisses her, much to the disgust of the others] LADY BEACONSFIELD. Thank you, Dizzy! [To the others] Every morning of his life wherever we are MRS. TRAVERS [Laughing] How ungallant to omit us! DISRAELI. My homage to Lady Beaconsfield, is a homage to the entire sex. LADY BEACONSFIELD [Protesting laughingly] No, no, Dizzy! I won't be put off like that! It's a personal love-token, and you know it. DISRAELI [Laughing] Lay not that flattering unc- tion to your soul! You know I married you for your money. [Everybody is deeply shocked] DISRAELI LADY BEACONSFIELD. All very well; but if 't wai to do over again, now you'd marry me for love. DISRAELI. Perish the thought! For all who marry for love either beat their wives, or run away from them. CHARLES [Indignantly] I trust you are jesting, sir! DISRAELI [Lifting his eyeglass and looking at him a moment] Sir, I trust I am. But I can never be sure. [Breaking off] Still no Probert? DUCHESS. Sir Michael is extremely busy. DISRAELI [Crossing toward the bell-pull] Tsh! Lazy man! CHARLES. Lazy ? DISRAELI. Why, of course. The man who does things, should never be seen doing 'em. CHARLES. That is a pose. DISRAELI. Not at all. It's a pose when he lets himself be seen. [To everybody's amazement he rings without asking leave. Then he remembers] Oh Duchess, may I ring? DUCHESS [Sharply] You have. Surely, you have breakfasted? DISRAELI. Ages ago! [To the SERVANT who enters and comes to the DUCHESS] Ah would you very kindly tell Sir Michael Probert I wish to speak to him? [He carelessly drops his hat and cloak on the SER- VANT'S arm] [The SERVANT is taken aback and glances at the DUCHESS. She nods. SERVANT exit] DUKE [to break the awkward 'pause to the young people] Er had a pleasant game? CLARISSA [To LADY BEACONSFIELD, laughing] Poor Perkyns nearly fainted. 26 DISRAELI DISRAELI [To Clarissa] Why? DUCHESS [Stiffly] One does not realise that the Governor of the Bank of England can be ah rung for. DISRAELI [Simply] Why not? DUKE [Interposing hastily] My dear Belinda, Mr. Disraeli orders us all about. We tremble at his nod. LADY BEACONSFIELD. What do you want Sir Michael for? MRS. TRAVERS. The Prime Minister and the Gov- ernor of the Bank! What wonderful things we shall witness! DISRAELI. I fear not, dear lady ! [To the DUCHESS] I am going to carry my impertinence so far as to ask you to allow me to see Probert in private. DUCHESS. Will you take him to the library? DISRAELI. The library is too solemn. It suggests a conference. [Carelessly] No this dainty room, with its flowers, its sunshine, will answer my purpose quite well. [General horrified amazement] DUCHESS [Rising indignant] But ! DUKE [Hastily] Of course, of course. We'll clear out. [Offering MRS. TRAVERS his arm] Mrs. Travers, I '11 show you my guns. Belinda, take Lady Beacons- field to the orangery. [Exit with MRS. TRAVERS. The CUDWORTHS and BROOKES go off into the garden] DUCHESS [Moving to go, turns to CLARISSA] You will entertain Deeford, Clarissa. CHARLES [To CLARISSA] I shall be enchanted. Lady Clarissa, I should like to tell you about my ah reforms on the estate. I am convinced that a happy peasantry 27 DISRAELI DISRAELI [Attentive, coming over to CHARLES] What reforms, young gentleman? CHABLES [Haughtily] Oh! I fear you would con- sider them beneath notice. I am reclaiming marshy districts introducing a new system of drainage building model dwellings model dairies mere ques- tions of sanitation. DISRAELI [Looks at CHARLES with surprise] Why I had no idea ! That is splendid! That is true statesmanship Health before everything! Sanitas aanitatum: omnia sanitas! CHARLES [Bridling] I knew you would laugh a\ me. [To CLARISSA] Will you come? CLARISSA [Coldly] Very sorry. I 'm going to write up my diary. [She turns to go] CHARLES [Following her] Your diary ? CLARISSA. Yes. [Indicating DISRAELI] During our walk he said things I want to remember. [CHARLES makes an angry gesture and exit through right, shutting it after him] THE BUTLER [Flings the door open and announces] Sir Michael Probert. [Enter SIR MICHAEL PROBERT, CLARISSA curtsies to him] PHOBERT [To everybody] Good morning! [CLARISSA exit] PROBERT [To DISRAELI] Mr. Disraeli, I am very busy this morning. DISRAELI. Then how grateful you must be for this interruption! 98 DISRAELI DUCHESS [Going into the garden] I hope you will not be long. DISRAELI. Ah that depends on Probert. [The DUCHESS and LADY BEACONSFIELD go out] PROBERT. Now, Mr. Disraeli DISRAELI. One moment. [He crosses to the door, which he closes, then he closes the casement of the centre window and then the French window on the left] PROBERT [Watching him in wonderment] Good Heavens! Isn't it warm enough? DISRAELI. Extraordinary how voices travel. PROBERT. Eh? DISRAELI. And how pretty ears come halfway to meet them. PROBERT. Do you suggest ? DISRAELI. Nothing. Sit down, Probert. Sit down! PROBERT [Sitting unwillingly] I am unusually busy! DISRAELI. I am usually busy. Now tell me. You arrived last night after we had all gone to bed, but you found a note from me awaiting you. PHOBERT. Ha! ha! That was not meant to be taken in earnest. DISRAELI. Pardon me, in dead earnest. PROBERT. Do you seriously mean you are think- ing of purchasing the Suez Canal? DISRAELI. I have seldom meant anything half so seriously. PROBERT. But it's not for sale. DISRAELI. It is for sale. Ismail is dying to sell. PROBERT. How do you know? DISRAELI. How does n't matter. PROBERT. And you ask the Bank of England tn back you? 29 DISRAELI DISRAELI. Temporarily. Until Parliament meets. PROBERT. On this vague knowledge which you will not even explain. DISRAELI. I will explain when the time comes. All I want now, is your assent on principle. PROBEBT. Then let me tell you at once, sir, you shall never have that assent. Never, sir! [About to rise] DISRAELI [Stopping him] Wait a moment! PtDBEBT [Sitting again] No, sir. There is nothing to wait for. I am a serious man. I shall not allow the Bank to play at ducks and drakes with the money entrusted to its keeping. Ducks and drakes, sir, on an Egyptian ditch. DISRAELI. Egyptian ditch? That's rather neat. Only it's not ducks and drakes, because the Govern- ment will be at your back. PBOBERT. How do I know that? DISRAELI [With a flash] I say so. PROBEBT. Suppose the government fall? DISRAELI [Turning on him] My dear man, it's always falling. What difference does that make? Don't the Conservatives invariably go on just where the Radicals left off, and vice versa? Besides, in this case, it has n't time to fall. This thing must be done within the next three weeks: long before Parliament meets [Mas. TRAVERS appears outside on the lawn, close to the casement] PROBERT. Why in such a hurry? DISRAELI. Because Russia PROBERT [Interrupting him with a snort] Oh! that ancient bugbear I 80 DISRAELI DISRAELI. That ever-present peril! knows of this opportunity to purchase the highroad to India. PBOBEBT. Then why has n't she purchased it? DISRAELI. She's not ready she has no fleet; but * she is watching us. She is watching me [MRS. TBAVERS opens the centre casement and listens] PROBERT. Ha! The spy Mania ! DISRAELI. And if she sees the slightest move on my part, she will snap up the canal, fleet or no fleet! PROBERT [Turning to him] But my dear sir [He sees MRS. TRAVERS. She is innocently plucking a flower from a bush outside window] By Jove, what a pretty woman! [She holds the flower in her hand, looks in at them, nods pleasantly, and passes on} DISRAELI [Turns as PROBERT speaks. Waits until she begins to move on, then turns to PROBERT] Yes. [Watches her going, then turns to PROBERT again] Such pretty ears! [Goes up and closes the casement, stands there, thinking a moment: then dismisses the incident and comes down to PHOBERT, who has resumed his seat] Well, sir, after that delightful interlude PROBERT. No, sir, in my opinion your scheme is hare-brained. Moreover it is [With great emphasis] unconstitutional; and the Bank will be no party to your high-handed methods. DISRAELI [Impatiently] I tell you there is no time PROBERT [Waving him aside] You exaggerate the importance of the thing. You have the Eastern imagination. Because this canal runs through a desert, you see it in a dream in a mirage ! 31 DISRAELI DISRAELI [Sitting] Neat again. [With a whimsical glance at him] Ah, we poets! PROBEBT. The canal is a confessed failure. DISRAELI. Oh? PROBERT. Whatever does n't pay 's a failure. The tonnage that, passed through it last year DISRAELI [Interrupting him impatiently] Oh, please, please! PROBERT. And it's silting up, sir; silting up! Soon the only ship sailing on it will be the ship of the desert. I mean the camel, sir! DISRAELI [Innocently] I thought you meant the camel. PROBERT. Beware of the East. Don't touch it or you will go under. Remember Pharaoh, sir! Re- member Pharaoh! DISRAELI. Yes; but what about Moses? PROBERT. He was a Jew hum he was privi- leged. DISRAELI. In short ? PROBERT. In short [Rising] I disapprove of your imperialistic ideas, Mr. Disraeli, and the Bank shall not stir a finger to further them. [DISRAELI moves away, mastering his anger, and opens the windows] Why are you ? DISRAELI. I feared you were getting too warm. PROBERT. Ha! I rejoice to think I have made this rash enterprise impossible. DISRAELI [Looking out at window left] Oh, but you have n't. PROBERT. What! Where will you go for the money? DISRAELI [Turning to him and coming down slowly( Where Pharaoh went. Where all Christians go. I DISRAELI shall go to Moses. [PBOBEBT is nonplussed for the moment, but recovers and crosses determinedly to the doors] PROBERT. At any rate, understand. It will be no use coming to me. Under no circumstances whatso- ever will the National Institution of which I am the head, be a party to your unconstitutional methods. [At the door, turning to DISRAELI] This, sir, is definite and final. DISRAELI. Nothing is final, Sir Michael. In the unlikely event of Moses failing me, I may send for you again. PROBERT [Defiantly] And I shall not come, sir! [Exit] [LADY BEACONSFIELD has entered through the window] DISRAELI [Looking after PROBERT] I think you will. I think you will. [He closes the door and stands thinking a moment] LADY BEACONSFIELD [Anxiously] Have you quar- relled with him? DISRAELI. No no, my dear, but he's missed his opportunity. [He crosses quickly to writing desk, pulls the bell and sits to write a telegram] Mary, I want you to come to my room and write some letters for me. I must get hold of Hugh Meyers. LADY BEACONSFIELD [With a touch of anxiety] Hugh Meyers, the banker? DISRAELI. Hugh Meyers, the banker. That's the m*n, Mary, that's the man. [BUTLER enters] Would you very kindly send that telegram? [Gives it to BUTLER, who exit R.] 33 DISRAELI [DISRAELI picks up MRS. TBAVERS' fan, looks at it and thinks, puts it down, rises and comes slowly to the centre. LADY BEACONSFIELD watches him; anxiously calls to him: "Dizzy." He stops and beckons to her to come to him] DISRAELI. Mary where have I seen Mrs. Travers before? LADY BEACONSFIELD [Relieved] Oh, we've met her at dinners DISRAELI. No, no! I mean, long ago. LADY BEACONSFIELD., Now, Dizzy! You're off on one of your wild-goose chases. DISRAELI. And now she haunts me. LADY BEACONSFIELD. She worships you as all pretty women do. DISRAELI [Musing] Blue and white blue and white LADY BEACONSFIELD. What are you talking about? DISRAELI. I connect her something blue and white. [MRS. TRAVERS and CLARISSA are seen crossing on the lawn. MRS. TRAVERS laughs] LADY BEACONSFIELD. Dizzy! DISRAELI. Here she is again! with Clarissa. Run along, my dear, run along. [LADY BEACONSFIELD exit] [He follows her. Just as he is at the door, he hears MRS. TRAVERS laughing again. He looks towards her] Where the devil was it? [Exit closing the door] [Enter MRS. TRAVERS and CLARISSA from th garden] 34 DISRAELI CLARISSA [Looking after DISRAELI] There, We've driven him away! What a pity! MRS. TRAVERS. What a hero- worshipper you are! CLARISSA. But what a hero to worship! When I am talking with him, I am talking with one of the makers of history. MRS. TRAVERS [Insidiously] I suppose he unbur- dens himself to you quite freely? CLARISSA. It never seems as though it were im- portant; but, suddenly, I find he is telling me great and wonderful things. He thinks in empires. MRS. TRAVERS. This friendship between the young girl and the statesman is strangely beautiful. How precious your sympathy must be to him. CLARISSA. I realise what he has done for his country; what difficulties he has overcome by his genius; and everybody else seems so trivial so unnecessary. Don't you feel that? [She sits on the ottoman] MRS. TRAVERS. I think I understand. What would I give to make a third in your conversations! [Sits beside her] CLARISSA. Why don't you? MRS. TRAVERS. Poor little me! I have n't brains enough. No. You must sometimes tell me in a simple way what he has been saying. [Innocently] For instance, why did he summon Sir Michael just now? CLARISSA. Oh! He does n't talk about little things like that! He discusses the condition of the people, the policy of nations. MRS. TRAVERS. And his own ambitions? CLARISSA. Never. His ambition is limited to making his country great. MRS. TRAVERS. But tell me why 35 DISRAELI [Enter CHARLES, from the garden] CHARLES. So your Mr. Disraeli has kindly allowed you to come back? CLARISSA [Rising] Come, Agatha! Mamma will be wanting me. CHARLES. The Duchess sent me to ask Mrs. Travers to join her. CLARISSA [To MRS. TRAVERS] Agatha, come! CHARLES [To CLARISSA] As a reward, she held out the hope that you would cheer my loneliness. MRS. TRAVERS [To CLARISSA, hastily] Yes, dear; that is only fair. [Exit, turning at the window to smile at CHARLES] CHARLES [With a sigh of satisfaction] Ah ! Now, Lady Clarissa, pray be seated. CLARISSA [Coming over to him; abruptly] Why do you dislike Mr. Disraeli so much? CHARLES [Taken aback] I neither like him, nor dislike him. He is nothing to me. CLARISSA. Oh? Don't you feel lonely? CHARLES [Astonished] Lonely ? CLARISSA. You are the only man in all the world, who neither likes nor dislikes Mr. Disraeli. CHARLES [Dismissing the subject. Patronizingly] Yes, yes. I know how you admire him. But we won't argue about that now. I have had the honour of a conversation with your mother. CLARISSA [With a quick look at him] Yes? CHARLES. And she has given me her gracious per- mission to address you. CLARISSA [Demurely] Was her permission needed? M DISRAELI CHARLES. For my present purpose, yes. I am rather a stickler for form, you know. CLARISSA. [Simply] I know. CHARLES. The fact is, as I told your mother, I consider it my duty to marry CLARISSA. Yes ? CHARLES. It is perhaps a little early. But I have views, and I wish to have time to inculcate them in my wife before she has to assume her full responsibil- ities and ah privileges as Duchess of Dunelm. CLARISSA [Sitting on the ottoman] Yes? CHARLES. I am much interested in the working- man. I have plans for building model cottages, with improved ah sanitary appliances. I shall spend a good deal of time among my people. I shall expect my wife to help me. We must raise the tone of the agricultural labourer. You will hardly believe that many of them have never heard of Ruskin. All that must be altered. I trust the Duke and Duchess of Dunelm will show their humble friends a model Eng- lish household, model children in short, a model CLARISSA. One moment. What have all these models to do with me? CHARLES [Somewhat surprised] Have I not made myself clear? Since I first had the privilege of meet- ing you, I have watched you closely, and, ah Clarissa [Sitting beside her] may I call you Clar- issa? [She bows assent] I have decided that in time, you will become admirably suited to occupy the position I have er adumbrated. CLARISSA [Quickly] I beg your pardon? CHARLES [Explaining graciously] Adumbrated outlined. CLARISSA [Demurely] Thank you. You will think 37 DISRAELI me very silly, Charles may I call you Charles? [He gravely bows assent] Thank you. But I am not quite sure I understand you, even yet. Is this is this really an offer of marriage? CHARLES. I hoped I had made that clear without offensive plainness of speech. CLARISSA [Staring at him] How wonderful! CHARLES [Kindly] Oh! You have the right to expect a high matrimonial alliance. CLARISSA [After a humorous glance at him] But I mean the manner of your proposal. CHARLES. Surely CLARISSA. You are a young man of twenty-five, and I am a girl of nineteen and you come with an essay on political economy ! CHARLES. I am a man with heavy responsibilities; not a hero of romance. You will enter a family, not one of the women of which has ever been talked about, and of which the men have never done anything to be ashamed of. CLARISSA. Have they ever done anything? CHARLES. Nothing, thank God, to attract atten- tion. [Rising] Well! I think the next thing, is to announce our betrothal CLARISSA [Also rising] Not quite the next thing. I am very much honoured, Lord Deeford, but I must decline the responsibilities and the privileges. CHARLES [Taken aback] I beg your pardon CLARISSA [With a great outburst] O, Charles, Charles! You've made a horrible hash of the whole thing! [CHARLES is horrified] Yes! for pity's sake, let me talk slang, or I shall have hysterics! I did like you; I liked you very much. You are entirely and spotlessly correct. But I am not. [Defiantly] I 38 DISRAELI don't like King Arthur. Galahad bores me to tears. Charles! Ruskin bores me to death! I should die at Dunelm Castle. Your women, who have never been talked about, and your men, who have never done anything, would make me scream. Your model cottages leave me cold, because I know the labourer wants bread, not bricks; and oh! those model chil- dren! I want flesh and blood children, who tear their pinafores and smear their faces with jam! CHARLES. But Lady Clarissa ! 1 CLARISSA. If ever I marry and I hope I shall) my husband will be a man who has got himself into dreadful tangles, so that I may sympathise with him and get him out of them. And he must be doing things all the time! I am sorry for you, Charles. It is dreadful to begin life, handicapped with a title and a ready-made position. But I want a husband who is at the bottom, and is climbing! climbing on hands and knees, bleeding hands and bleeding knees, with his eyes fixed on the summit. Never mind if he never gets there; I can help him to climb, and, if he falls, I can fall with him. CHARLES. But I ! CLARISSA. No! You were born at the top. You sit in a rarified atmosphere like the gods on Olympus and design model cottages [She suddenly gives a cry of joy, as she sees DISRAELI entering] Ah! CHARLES [With an angry look at DISRAELI who re- mains standing at the open door] I see I have made a mistake. [Exit into the garden] DISRAELI [Closes the door and comes to CLARISSA] So you have refused him? CLARISSA [Surprised] Oh! How did you know? 39 DISRAELI DISRAELI. That back was eloquent of refusal. You have no sympathy with ready-made greatness. [Play- fully] Ah you are a little Radical. CLARISSA. Perhaps. DISRAELI. At heart everybody is. I am. CLARISSA [With amused protest] You! DISRAELI. Certainly. We want to bring every- body to a uniform level; so as to begin all over again and rise above everybody. CLARISSA [With a smile. Sitting on the ottoman] Is that Radicalism? DISRAELI. It works out that way. You refuse Deeford because he is a mere descendant; not an ancestor. CLABISSA. Well? Am I not right? DISRAELI. He may become an ancestor, you know. [She laughs. He sits beside her] Are you fond of him? [Takes her hand] CLARISSA [Turning to him', thoughtfully and sin- cerely] I like him very much. When he forgets Oxford, he can be quite charming. If he had simply said, "Clarissa, will you marry me?" I might have answered, just as simply, "Yes." But he lectured me on model cottages and the model family ! DISRAELI. I have a very high opinion of him. CLABISSA [Amazed] Why, one of my grievances against him is that he does not appreciate you! DISRAELI. He is a little less than courteous to me, because he may go through any door hi front of me by right of birth. That is so ridiculous that it becomes sublime. CLABISSA. It is disgusting. DISRAELI. No. It is a foundation on which to build empires. That conscious superiority is UM 40 DISRAELI quality which enables one Anglo-Saxon to go out among thirty thousand savages and make them fear him, and hate him and adore him. CLARISSA. But he has no initiative! DISRAELI. Who knows? [Rising] When he boasted just now about his reforms, his model cottages, he gave me a new insight into his character; showed me there was something in him. CLARISSA. Then why does n't he let it come out? DISRAELI [Turning to her urith a smile] If the opportunity occurred, he might rise to it. CLARISSA [Rising] A man should make his own opportunities. And it's no use talking. I refused him; and I told him why. DISRAELI. Did you? CLARISSA. Quite frankly. DISRAELI. Did you. CLARISSA [Almost impatiently] I told him I must have a man of action, of initiative, a man who tried. [With a burst of enthusiasm] Oh, Mr. Disraeli, one does not live hi your company, see you, and listen to you, without learning DISRAEU [Interrupting her gently] My dear child, I hope you will learn! I hope you will. And you must begin by giving Deeford CLARISSA [Stopping her ears] Don't! As he is now, I would sooner marry a bricklayer. He does lay bricks; and he may build a cathedral. [DISRAELI sits on the ottoman laughing but thought- ful. Enter LADY BEACONSFIELD] LADY BEACONSFIELD [As she enters and closes door] Now, Clarissa, you've had more than your share of my Dixy 41 DISRAELI CiiARissA [Going up to the window] He has been giv- ing me good advice [With a pretty pout at DISRAELI] which I am not going to follow! [Exit into garden] LADY BEACONSFIELD [Going towards the window, turns] Are you coming out? DISRAELI [Sitting on the ottoman, thoughtfully] Dee- ford has asked Clarissa to marry him. LADY BEACONSFIELD [Without enthusiasm] I sup- pose that's a good match. DISRAELI. And she has refused him. LADY BEACONSFIELD [Coming down, interestedly] Oh? DISRAELI [Suddenly rising] Mary I am going to play fairy godfather and bring them together. LADY BEACONSFIELD [Laughing] You! A match- maker! As if you had n't enough to do! DISRAELI. Ah! Who knows but this may be the greatest thing I have done. I have been searching for a young man. With such a prize as Clarissa, Deeford may become just what I need. Think what a splendid couple they'd make. LADY BEACONSFIELD [Beside him] Ah, Dizzy always dreaming a romance! DISRAELI [Turning to her tenderly] And living one, my dear, while you are at my side. [They go up stage arm in arm] LADY BEACONSFIELD [Looking off] The terrible Duchess, and Deeford and she 's looking black. DISRAELI [With his back to the window] Then he's told her of his rejection. Does she appear to be talk- ing much? LADY BEACONSFIELD. Volumes! DISRAELI [With mock fear. Into her ear] Mary we'll go for a walk! [Exeunt into garden] 42 DISRAELI [Enter DUCHESS and CHARLES from garden] DUCHESS [Very indignant] I am surprised and shocked. I shall talk to Clarissa. CHARLES. I fear that will have no effect. DUCHESS. I am not in the habit of talking without effect! To what do you attribute her refusal? CHARLES. May I speak my mind freely? DUCHESS. Of course. CHARLES. Then let me say with all respect, I fear she has had her head turned. DUCHESS. What do you mean? By whom? CHARLES. By Mr. Disraeli. DUCHESS [Shocked and indignant] Charles! CHARLES. Pray don't misunderstand me! Clarissa is very young. She has made a hero of this Jew. He talks to her in his persuasive and magnetic way, and, what is far more dangerous, he encourages her to talk to him; fosters her foolish hum! her high-flown ideals and enthusiasm. The consequence is that I seem uninteresting uninspiring in a word, unromantic! DUCHESS. I warned Glastonbury something dread- ful would happen if we had that person here. What am I to do? The Duke shakes in his shoes at the sight of him. [She looks out through the window and sees DISRAELI, LADY BEACONSFIELD and CLARISSA crossing the lawn] Here he comes I dare not trust myself to speak to him. I '11 talk to Clarissa. CHARLES. And I '11 talk to Mr. Disraeli! DUCHESS. Be careful! CHARLES. Oh, I'm not afraid of him! [He turns over the leaves sf ioo/i] 43 DISRAELI [Enter DISRAELI through the window. He bows to the DUCHESS, who goes out through the opposite window haughtily. He smiles and comes down] DISRAELI. Ah, Deeford? Courting the Muse? CHARLES [Offensively] No. I neither read novels nor write them. DISRAELI. Pity. Innocent recreations, both; and the latter lucrative. CHARLES. [Slamming the book and commencing a speech] Mr. Disraeli DISRAELI [Deprecatingly] There, now ! I know that tone of voice so well CHARLES [Coming towards him angrily] What do you mean, sir? DISRAELI. It 's the tone of an angry man. Now, what can have put you out? [At a movement from CHARLES] No. Don't speak. Interruptions are an- noying. If they had n't interrupted me the first time I addressed the house, I might have become a vestry- man and respectable. CHARLES. Really, Mr. Disraeli, you make it diffi- cult to talk to you seriously. DISRAELI. Oh! Never talk seriously. Keep your grave face for your jokes. CHARLES [Turning away, disgustedly] I never make jokes. DISRAELI. The man who never makes jokes is a standing joke to the world. CHARLES. Mr. Disraeli! Clarissa has refused me. DISRAELI [Gravely] Yes? CHARLES [Coming over to him] And I, sir, I at- tribute her refusal to your influence. 44 DISRAELI DISRAELI [Looking at him keenly] I see I wo? thoroughly justified in thinking well of you. CHARLES [Astonished] What do you mean? DISRAELI. You have courage, or you could never say that to me. CHARLES [Haughtily] Pray, why should I not say it? DISRAELI. Because it is true. And when a very young man speaks an unpleasant truth to a very old one he shows absolutely reckless courage. CHARLES. There was no other way. DISRAELI [Impatiently, turning away] A hundred. Do you take a girl's No as final? CHARLES. I suppose she knows her own mind DISRAELI. Certainly. But make her change it. CHARLES. How? DISRAELI [Turning to him and smiling] I am glad you are asking me to help you because I am inter- ested in you. CHARLES. Interested in me? DISRAELI. Deeply. CHARLES. Why? DISRAELI. Because England stands in terrible need of men of your stamp. CHARLES [Contemptuously] I cannot see that. Eng- land is doing very well. [With a fine oratorical manner] She was never so prosperous as now. She has a wise aristocracy, an industrious middleclass, and a con- tented and happy peasantry. Other nations envy her. DISRAELI. Splendid! Splendid! How many old Tory squires I've heard talk just like that! And that's how they've talked since the beginning of things. That's how they talked when we lost America ; when the Indian mutiny burst upon us; when our 45 DISRAELI soldiers froze and starved in the Crimea; when we deserted Denmark; and when we sat idle while France and Germany flew at each other's throats. It's just that talk that has lost us all our friendships. CHARLES [Contemptuously] Ah! Continental friendships! Frog-eaters! beer-swillers! DISRAELI [Very nearly angry masters himself] Ah is that how you talked to Clarissa? CHARLES. I do not discuss politics with women. DISRAELI. I do. [He takes CHARLES by the arm and forces him down beside him on the ottoman] See man! See! England is as isolated as a ship lying off the coast. Her crew know nothing of what they call the land-lubbers. They go on shore now and then for a debauch; and as they only hunt out the vice, they come back with a headache, and righteously thank God they are not as other men! I tell you a ferment is at work all over the world. Titanic forces are unchained in America; forces you have no con- ception of. The spirit of nationality has awakened in France, in Germany, in Italy. New wine has been poured into the old bottles, and an explosion must follow sooner or later. I shall not live to see it, but I hear the seething of the yeast! But you ! My God, what things you will witness! Take care you are not asleep I All the nations must expand, and everywhere our empire is in their way Russia, for instance. Now, while England stands alone, while France is crippled, and before Germany has recovered now is Russia's opportunity to snatch at India. With India lost, the whole fabric crumbles; and Eng- land sinks into insignificance: a Belgium at sea! [Rising] Now do you see why Clarissa refused you? These are the things I have shown her. Do you 46 DISRAELI wonder she wants a man of action? Do you wonder she will not be content with being a mere Duke's wife? CHARLES [Deeply impressed] I see [Rising] But what can I do? What can any one man do? DISRAELI. What one man has already done! CHARLES [Coming to him] You, sir? But how can I hope to emulate you? DISRAELI. You can learn Will you learn? CHARLES [Eagerly] Will you teach me, sir? DISRAELI. Yes. CHARLES. How can I begin? DISRAELI. Leave your small ideals; or, better still, grow from small ideals to greater. You have begun well; you are setting your house in order, now pass on! Pass from the Parish to the Empire! CHARLES. The parish! How small it seems! And everything I've done in politics how utterly insig- nificant! DISRAELI. In politics nothing is insignificant. CHARLES [Laughing bitterly] Contrast it with this question of India? DISRAELI. Whether we hold it or lose it? CHARLES. Yes! Yes! What is the solution war? DISRAELI. War is never a solution; war is an aggravation. CHARLES [Eagerly] What, then, is the solution? DISRAELI [Turns and looks at him steadily awhile as if deciding whether he is fit to be told, then comes close to him, and speaks almost in a whisper] A very small thing; a thing men are laughing at. CHARLES. What, sir, what? DISRAELI. A ditch. A ditch dug in sand. CHARLES [Puzzled] A ditch ? DISRAELI. A ditch, dug in shifting sand. 47 DISRAELI CHARLES. You mean the ! [DISRAELI swiftly mo- tions him, to silence, and slowly approaches the door on the left] CHARLES [Watching him with amazement] Why, sir? Surely, this secluded room in a nobleman's house is, of all places, the most secure [DISRAELI opens the door. MRS. TRAVERS follows the opening door with her hand on the handle] DISRAELI [Apologising profusely] I beg your pardon! MRS. TRAVERS [Quite unperturbed] Thank you so much. Dear Clarissa left her book DISRAELI. A fortunate circumstance for us. What was the book? MRS. TRAVERS. Sybil. [She makes a pretence of looking for the book] DISRAELI. I have heard of it. Now, where can it be? [He makes a great show of looking for it, but keeps an eye on her] Do help us, Deef ord. Remember, a ditch in sand, gives the best soil for celery. [To MRS. TRAVERS while they are all ostensibly hunting] We were in the thick of a very interesting discussion some people say loam MRS. TRAVERS. Really? DISRAELI. And some advocate a fertilizer [MRS. TRAVERS taking a book from under her wrap, turns and seeing DISRAELI'S back towards her, slips it behind a piece of furniture. DISRAELI sees her] But I say sand, MRS. TRAVERS [Still looking for the book] Sand? [During the thick of the hunt, enter the DUKE followed by LADY BEACONSFIELD, LORD and LADY CUD- WORTH, LORD and LADY BROOKE and CLARISSA] DUKE [Cheerfully] What are you all playing? Hide and seek? 48 DISRAELI DISRAELI. Something like it, Duke. [He finds the book] Ah! There it is! Now is n't that remarkable? [He stoops to pick it up] LADY BEACONSFIELD. Now, Dizzy, you know you are not to stoop. DISRAELI. Ah, but to pick up things one must. [To MRS. TKAVERS, handing her the book] Must n't one? [She looks at him, in a half -smiling, puzzled way] DUCHESS [Entering unconscious of anything unusual] I have arranged we are all to picnic in the Abbey ruins to-morrow. DISRAELI. Dear Duchess, I am deeply grieved, but we shall not be able to avail ourselves of your exquisite hospitality beyond to-day DUCHESS [Coldly] Oh ? I am sorry. But, of course Deeford, will you drive the drag? DISRAELI. Deeford is coming witH us. [A general movement of astonishment. CHARLES looks expectantly towards DISRAELI] DUCHESS [Turning round sharply] What? DISRAELI. I require his assistance DUCHESS [Amazed and indignant^ "Require his assistance ! " DISRAELI. Lord Deeford has done me the honour of accepting a secretaryship. [Exclamations] MRS. TRAVERS. How unexpected! Lord Dee- ford working! Clarissa! Is n't that unexpected? CLARISSA [With a smile, looking at CHABLES] Not altogether. MRS. TRAVERS. And how he'll have to w^rk! [To DISRAELI] You will have so many thing? to teach him. CHARLES [Looking at CLARISSA] Mr. Disroct* has already begun. DISRAELI DISRAELI. Yes, I have been teaching him what it took me many years to learn. MRS. TRAVERS. And what is that? DISRAELI [Turning slowly and looking at her] Dear lady, that a ditch dug in sand gives the best soil for celery. CURTAIN MR. GEORGE ARLJSS AS DISRAELI ACT H SCENE In Downing Street DISRAELI'S private room in Downing Street. On the left a large window opens on a glass-covered balcony full of evergreens and flowers. At the back, towards the left a door; another door in the right corner and a third door in front, on the right. In the centre of the room a great writing table, with a chair behind it. Two other chairs R. and L. of table. On the walls roller maps, engraved portraits of statesmen. The general aspect of the room is solemn and dignified, not to say heavy. The table is littered with documents, blue-books and letters. A smaller table in front, below the window on the left. Chair near it. [The room is empty, as the curtain rises. Presently FOLJAMBE opens the door in the right corner cautiously and peers into the room; he is about to enter but with- draws quickly as the lower door R. is opened through which enters MR. TEARLE, with letters; some un- opened, which he places on small table left; others opened, which he places on the large table centre. MR. TEARLE exit R. front. In the meantime FOLJAMBE has been seen watching him furtively. As soon as the CLERK has gone, FOLJAMBE slips in with catlike swiftness. He stands at the left corner of the writing table facing and watching the entrance-door. With one hand he shuffles the letters, and at the same time peers at them. His eye falls on an open letter. This he coaxes towards him DISRAELI 1 and tries to read out of the corner of his eye. Enter DISRAELI suddenly, followed by MR. TEAHLE. FOL- JAMBE stands quite unembarrassed] DISRAELI [Pleasantly] Good morning, Mr. Fol- jambe [To MR. TEARLE] You did not tell me Mr. Foljambe was waiting. TEARLE [At door] He was not here, sir. [Closes door] Your personal letters are on the table, sir. DISRAELI [To him] Thank you, Mr. Tearle. [Sits in chair behind table] [Exit TEARLE through door up R.] [DISRAELI looks at FOLJAMBE enquiringly] FOLJAMBE. I have come on a personal matter, sir. DISRAELI. Yes? [Glances over his letters and makes pencil notes on their backs] FOLJAMBE [In the tone of a just man urith a grievance] I have had the honour of being here some time DISRAELI. Yes? FOLJAMBE. I feel I can be of little use to you under present circumstances. DISRAELI. I don't understand. FOLJAMBE. If I may say so, you seem to be keep- ing me at arm's length. DISRAELI [Protesting] Oh! Your presence at my elbow is a proof to the contrary. FOLJAMBE. I am not in the close touch with you I had hoped for. No important matters have been entrusted to me. Even my room is upstairs a long way off. DISRAELI. Patience! Patience! You will remem- ber I told you I must observe you a little while. I have been doing so. The result is just what I expected. FOLJAMBE. I am very grateful, sir May I hope ? 52 DISRAELI DISRAELI. Yes. Henceforth I will keep you busy. Matters of great consequence are coming up to-day FOIFAMBE [Eagerly] Yes, sir? DISRAELI. Yes, Mr. Foljambe; I may say, one matter of National importance. FOLJAMBE [Insidiously] Of er Imperial impor- tance, sir? DISRAELI. Yes, even of Imperial importance. FOLJAMBE. Indeed, sir! DISRAELI. For unless the heart be sound the whole body must suffer. FOLJAMBE. You allude sir, to ? DISRAELI. I allude to drainage. FOLJAMBE [Disappointed] Drainage? [Then insin^ uatingly] Ah, the drainage of waste-places, the drainage of the desert? DISRAELI. No, no, Mr. Foljambe, the drainage of London. A great scheme. Enormous expense. I am trying to arrange a loan. [Handing him a packet of papers from table] Here are the papers you might look them over. FOLJAMBE [Crestfallen, taking the papers] Is there nothing else, sir? DISRAELI. Yes, yes. [Picks up a blue document] This contains the report of the Secretary of State for India on the coaling stations and fortifications of the Gulf of Aden. Dry stuff, I fear. Let me see; where is the Gulf of Aden? [Rises and goes over to the maps, unrolls a map of Africa. Turning to FOLJAMBE: who has followed him] Where is the Gulf of Aden? [FOLJAMBE promptly points it out] You're familiar with the country, I see. [FOLJAMBE starts slightly. DISRAELI then examines the map] Ah yes! Very un- healthy climate, I believe. 53 DISRAELI FOLJAMBE [Deliberately] The district will grow in importance with the development of the Suez Canal. DISRAELI [With contempt] Oh, the Suez Canal! Silting up, sir; silting up! [Returns to table; DEE- FORD enters through door down R. He carries several large official blue envelopes, sealed] Ah, Deeford! CHARLES. Dispatches from Russia, sir. [DIS- RAELI takes them and places them on table. DEEFORD passes on over to his table on the left, where he sits and commences working at documents] FOLJAMBE. What do you wish me to do with those papers, sir? DISRAELI. In a moment. [Picks up engagement card and crosses to DEEFORD. FOLJAMBE edges towards table, glancing at dispatches] We shall have a very busy day to-day, Deeford. I lunch with the Gold- smiths' Company at one; I have to respond to the toast of Literature. Must say something nice about poor dear Lytton. Thinks he can write novels. [They laugh] This afternoon Lady Salisbury has a garden party at Hatfield. I do hope it won't rain. [DISRAELI turns his head slightly to glance out of window, FOLJAMBE quickly snatches up one dispatch to look at the one underneath; DISRAELI sees this out of the corner of his eye but continues] To-night Lady Beacons- field and I dine at the French Embassy admirable cooking! We have promised to look in at the Lyceum to see Irving's Hamlet. I shall probably sup with him at the Beefsteak Club. A strenuous day, Deeford. CHARLES [Laughing] But no work, sfr! DISRAELI. The less a Prime Minister does, the fewer mistakes he is apt to make. [Smiling] That's rather good. Mr. Foljambe, please make a note 54 DISRAELI of that. [FOLJAMBE watching DISRAELI deliberately puts the packet of white papers which DISRAELI gave him on top of the dispatches, then makes a note in a note book which he carries] The less a Prime Minister I must say that at Manchester Manchester will appre- ciate that. And it will infuriate John Bright. He has no sense of humour. [CHARLES and DISRAELI laugh. FOLJAMBE having made the note, now picks up the white papers and the dispatches as well and moves towards door as DISRAELI comes to him] DISRAELI [Glancing at the table as he comes up to FOL- JAMBE and noticing that the dispatches are gone] You might take up your quarters [Pointing to the door in the right corner] in this room it's more handy. I shall be able to see a great deal more of you You have the papers? [Looking through the papers in FOL- JAMBE'S hand, fingering them and turning them over] Oh, these are the dispatches from Russia. FOLJAMBE [Confused] I beg your pardon, sir. DISRAELI. Oh, a very natural mistake. [Takes them and replaces them on table] [Enter LADY BEACONSFIELD, dressed to go out] LADY BEACONSFIELD. Are n't you coming this morning? [CHARLES rises at once and places chair for her] DISRAELI. I'm afraid you must enjoy the Park without me, Mary. I am expecting a very important visitor this morning. [LADY BEACONSFIELD sits] [To FOLJAMBE] That reminds me. Mr. Meyers is coming presently FOLJAMBE [Impressed] Mr. Hugh Meyers ? DISRAELI. Mr. Hugh Meyers, the banker and millionaire. I may require your assistance. 65 DISRAELI FOLJAMBE. I shall be here all the morning. DISRAELI. Thank you. [As FOLJAMBE lingers] Is there anything else? FOLJAMBE [Indicating the blue papers which DISRAELI is still holding] Those papers, sir. DISRAELI. Oh to be sure! There. [Holding them while FOLJAMBE takes one end] That's the Blue one and the White one blue and white that's curious [Their eyes meet] Thank you. [Exit FOLJAMBE] [DISRAELI goes up with him, then turns. To CHARLES who is at the writing table making notes on a document] Charming man, is n't he? CHARLES [Hesitating] Yes DISRAELI [With a laugh] That was a very negative yes. CHARLES. He never looks one in the face. DISRAELI. Ah it's the man who does look one in the face one must have doubts about. LADY BEACONSFIELD [Anxiously] Dizzy why is Mr. Meyers coming to see you? DISRAELI [At the writing table] On very urgent business, my dear. LADY BEACONSFIELD. Is it anything personal, Dizzy? DISRAELI [To CHARLES] Deeford, this Saint mar- ried me when I was up to my neck in debt; and I do believe she thinks I am going to borrow money of Meyers now. [CHARLES laughs, goes back to his own table and sits] LADY BEACONSFIELD. I believe whatever you tell me. But this is the first time you have not taken me into your confidence. DISRAELI, You shall know in half an hour. 56 DISRAELI [BASCOT, a footman in morning livery, bearing a card on a small salver, enters, and comes to DISBAELI] LADY BEACONSFIELD. Well ! I shall cut my drive short, and I sha'n't enjoy it a bit. [Rises] DISRAELI [Rising, leans over table and lays an affec- tionate hand on LADY BEACONSFIELD'S arm, taking the card at the same time and glancing at it] There! There! Come back in a quarter of an hour. [After looking