354S 
 
 Mason 
 Ode to Mr. Pinchbeck
 
 ODE 
 
 T O 
 
 Mr. PINCHBECK, 
 
 UPON HIS NEWLY INVENTED 
 
 PATENT CANDLE-SNUFFERS, 
 
 By MALCOLM M' G R E G O R, Efq; 
 
 Author of the Heroic Epiftle to Sir William Chambers, and the 
 
 Heroic Poftfcript. 
 
 ^oufque ergo fruftra pafcemus ignigenum ijium ? Apuleii Met. Lib. 7. 
 Why fhould a Patent be granted to this Candle-Snuffer in vain ? 
 
 THE FIFTH EDITION. 
 
 LONDON: 
 
 Printed for J. A LMON, oppofiteBuRLiNGToN-H»usE, Piccadilly. 
 
 MDCCLXXVIL 
 
 [ Price Six-Pekce. ]
 
 ADVERTISEMENT. //Zo^ 
 
 EVER fince my firft Publication, the Curlofity, 
 not to fay Anxiety, of the World concerning my 
 
 Name, has been fo great, that it has frequently given 
 me Pain to conceal what the World will now {^^ 
 it was not poffible in my Power to difcover. 
 
 In fhort, I had no Name, till the Royal Favour 
 lately reftored my very antient and honourable Clan to 
 its priftine Title and Honours. I was therefore in the 
 fame deplorable Cafe with a certain namelefs Lady, 
 whom I have long had the Honour to call my Neigh- 
 bour, and who, I iincerely hope, will foon, by the fame 
 Favour, be reftored to that Title, which, upon my Ho- 
 nour, I believe, fhe has erronioufly, and not inten- 
 tionally forfeited. 
 
 I have only to add, that now, when the Public is 
 in poiTefTion of my real Name, it will not, I hope, fuf- 
 fer any national Prejudice to prevent it from receiving 
 
 this 
 
 87661^3
 
 [ 4 ] 
 this my firfl Lyrical Attempt with its former Candour. 
 But I muft needs fay, that if this Ode does not fell as 
 well as Mr. Cumberland's, I fhall be apt to impute it, 
 not to any inferiority of Lyrical Ordonance, but merely 
 to its having been written by a Scotchman. 
 
 Knightjbridgei May 6(h, 1776.
 
 O D E 
 
 T O 
 
 Mr. PINCHBECK. 
 
 I. 
 
 ILLUSTRIOUS Pinchbeck! condefcend, 
 Thou well-belov'd, and beft King's-Friend, 
 
 Thefe Lyric Lines to view; 
 O ! may they prompt thee, e'er too late, 
 To fnuff the Candle of the State, 
 
 That burns a little blue. 
 
 B It
 
 [ 6 ] 
 
 11. 
 
 It once had got a ftately Wick, 
 When in its Patent Candleftick 
 
 The Revolution put it ; 
 As white as Wax we faw it fhine 
 Thro' two whole Length's of Brunswick's Line, 
 
 'Till B— firft dar'd to fmut it. 
 
 in. 
 
 Since then but wherefore tell the Tale ? 
 
 Enough, that now it burneth pale, 
 
 And forely waftes its Tallow: 
 Nay, if thy Poet rightly weens, 
 (Though little fkill'd in Ways and Means) 
 
 Its Save-all is but fliallow. 
 
 IV. 
 Come then, ingenious Artift, come. 
 And put thy Finger and thy Thumb, 
 
 Into each polifli'd Handle; 
 On thee alone our Hopes depend. 
 Thy King's, and eke thy Country's Friend, 
 To trim Old England's Candle. 
 
 But
 
 [ 7 ] 
 V. 
 
 But firft we pray, for its Relief, 
 
 Pluck from its Wick, each Tory Thief, 
 
 It elfe muft quickly rue it ; 
 
 * While N and M fputter there, 
 
 Thou'lt ne'er prevent with all thy Care, 
 
 The melting of the Suet. 
 
 VI, 
 There's Twitcher too, that old He- witch,. 
 Sticks in its Bole as black as Pitch, 
 
 -f- And makes a filthy pother;. 
 When curft with fuch a forry Fiend, 
 And lighted too at either End,. 
 
 'Twill foon be in a fmother, 
 
 * Thefe Initials, like thofe in the Banns of Marriage publifhed between N. 
 and M. may be filled up at the Reader's Pleafure, . 
 
 Fide Commcn Prayer Book. 
 
 t Our ingenious Inventor's Snuffers are peculiarly calculated to remedy this 
 evil, to which indeed all Candles are more or lefs fubjeft. 
 
 See the Patentee's Advevtifimint. 
 
 I fear
 
 C 8 ] 
 VII. 
 
 I fear me much in fuch a plight, 
 
 Thofe Tapers bleft would lofe their Light, 
 
 Canadian Fanes that deck ; 
 Which pious --* — ordains to blaze, 
 And gild with their eftabliili'd Rays, 
 
 Our Lady of Quebec. 
 
 VIII. 
 X His Arms, thou hallowed Image ! blefs, 
 And furely thou canft do no lefs, 
 
 He is thy Faith's Defender ; 
 Thou oweft thy Place to him alone, 
 As other Jacobites have done, 
 
 And not to the Pretender. 
 
 X It is humbly prefumed, that the claflical Reader will here perceive a bold- 
 nefs of Tranfition only to be equalled by Pindar, and perhaps by Ho- 
 race in fome of his fublimer Odes. 
 
 Hafle
 
 [ 9 ] 
 
 IX. 
 
 Hafte then, and quafh the hot Turmoil, 
 That flames in Bo{lon*s angry Soil, 
 
 And frights the Mother-Nation: 
 Know, Lady ! if its Rage you flop, 
 PiwcHBECK fhall fend you, from his Shop, 
 
 A moft fuperb Oblation. 
 
 X. 
 
 His Patent-fnuffers, in a Difli 
 
 Of burnifli'd Gold ; if more you willi, 
 
 His Cyclops fhall beftir 
 Their brawny Stumps, and for thy fake, 
 Of Pinchbeck's own Mixt-metal make 
 A huge Extinguifher. 
 
 XL 
 To form the Mafs — - — , thy Zeal 
 Shall furnifh that well-temper'd Steel, 
 Thou didfl at Minden brandifh ; 
 Nor yet fhall G~'s reverend Dean, 
 Counting its Worth, refufe, I ween, 
 His ponderous leaden Standilh. 
 
 C Poor
 
 [ ^o ] 
 
 XII. 
 
 Poor Dodor Johnson, Tm afraid. 
 Can give but metaphoric Aid ; 
 
 His Style's cafe-liarden'd Graces : 
 M'Pherson, without Shame, or Fear, 
 Sir John Dai.r,ymple, and Shebbearp 
 
 Shall melt their brazen Faces. 
 
 XHF. 
 And fure, this mixt metallic Stuff, 
 Will yield Materials large enouglv^j .j i ;:.i;. 
 
 To mold the mighty Cone ;][rffi- p.aohvr^J ?\ 
 But how tranfport it, when 'tis cail ,,^ 
 Acrofs the deep Atlantic Vaft, z^y^-^-^. 
 
 'Twill weigh forne thoufand Stone - 
 
 XIV. 
 
 *' Leave that to me" our Lady cries, 
 ** Howe'er gigantic be its Size, 
 
 " I have a Scheme in petto ; 
 " ril fly with it ffora Shore to Shoff,. 
 " Safe as my footy Sifter bore, 
 
 " Her Cottage to Loretto, 
 
 4 
 
 >^' ■Of 
 
 '' Swift
 
 [ ^^ ] 
 
 XV. 
 
 " Swift to the Congrefs with my Freight 
 
 " I'll ipeed, and on their Heads its Weight 
 
 *' Soufe with fuch Skill and Care; 
 '< That Put'nam, Washington beneath, 
 "And gafping Lee iliall wllh to breathe 
 
 *' § A Pint of Priestley's Air. 
 
 XVI. 
 " The Deed is done, thy Foes are dead, 
 " No lono;er Enfrland, (halt thou dread 
 
 " Such Preibyterean Huffers ; 
 " Tliy Candle's Radiance ne'er (hall fade, 
 " With now and then a little Aid, 
 
 " From Pinchbeck's Patent- fniifTers." 
 
 § This great Philofopher has l.itcly difcovered a Method of fabricating a 
 nCA' ?pecies of Air, of fa infinitely fuperior faiubrity and duration to that 
 vulgar atmorphcrical Air, which for wsnt of better we have been obliged 
 to breathe for upwards of five thoufand Years, that it is to be fuppofej that 
 no Macaroni, Savoir Vivrc, or i;i plain Englifli, no bt).!) that knows what's 
 what, will in future condefcend to refpire any Air, that is not fcaled with 
 the DoiTtor's own ArniS, and figned with his own Hand-v.-riting, It is to be 
 feared, however, that his Pneumatic Vials will be liable to be counterfeited, 
 as our Philofopher has not Intereft enough at Court to procure a Patent. 
 Indeed were fuch a Patent granted, it might fuperfede Mr, Pinchbeck's; 
 becaufc that in this Air a Candle ij found to burn with fo bright and con- 
 tinued a Flame, that it could never want fnuSGng. 
 
 Sec Vol. 11. if Di\ Frie/iky^s F^'tnimi^nls en u4ir. 
 
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 AN Epiftle to Dr. Shebbearc: co 
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 Ode to Mr. Hinchbcck, upon his n w- 
 
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