m^ 
 
 V i.'
 
 1 .- ... '*T '-' 
 
 POUTICAL AND LITERARY 
 
 ANECDOTES.
 
 LONDON : 
 
 PRINTED 11\ THOMAS DAMSON^ VHITPrRl AI!S.
 
 POLITICAL AND LITEBAKY 
 
 ANECDOTES 
 
 OP 
 
 HIS OWN TIMES. 
 
 BY DR. WILLIAM KING, 
 
 PRIKCIPAI. OF ST. MARY HALL, OXON. 
 
 SECOND EDITION, 
 
 LONDON: 
 
 JOHN MURllAY, ALBEMARLE-STREET. 
 1819.
 
 y 
 
 
 But Io ! at once the pealing ooncerU ceane. 
 
 And crowded theatres are hush'd In peace. 
 
 See, on you sage how all attentive stand, 
 
 To catch his darting eye, and waving hand. 
 
 Hark ! he begins, with all a Tully's art. 
 
 To pour the dictates of a Cato's heart : 
 
 Skill'd to pronounce what noblest thoughts inspire, 
 
 He blends the speaker's with the patriot's fire ; 
 
 Bold to conceive, nor timorous to conceal, 
 
 What Britons dare to think, he dares to tell. 
 
 Tis his alike the ear and eye to charm. 
 
 To will with action, and with sense to warm ; 
 
 Untaught in flowery periods to dispense 
 
 The lulling sounds of sweet impertinence: 
 
 In frowns or smiles he gains an equal prize. 
 
 Nor meanly fears to fall, nor creeps to rise. 
 
 T. Warton. 

 
 ADVERTISEMENT. 
 
 A FRIEND, who was a long time a prisoner 
 in France, met with the following work 
 in the possession of two ladies, relatives 
 of the writer, Dr. King. From the 
 interesting passages which he was per- 
 mitted to extract, the Editor conceived 
 that the original might be well worthy 
 of publication ; he therefore desired his 
 friend to procure it, and found, on 
 a comparison of the hand-writing with 
 that which is well ascertained to be Dr. 
 King's in the account-books of St. Mary 
 Hall in Oxford (of which he was many 
 years the principal), that there is every 
 reason to suppose this MS. to have been 
 written by Dr. King himself. From certain 
 minute additions and corrections of the
 
 vill ADVERTISEMENT. 
 
 language, there can be little doubt of its 
 having been intended for publication. It 
 contains a very striking character of the 
 Pretender, and many interesting anec- 
 dotes of the Jacobite party, to which 
 he was strongly attached, and with the 
 leaders of which he was intimately ac- 
 quainted. There will also be found in it 
 an amusing jeu d* esprit called the Som- 
 nium Academicum, written in very pure 
 Latin, for which he was much distin- 
 guished; and many pleasant stories of 
 the great men and literary characters of 
 his days, with some elegant criticism on 
 the Latin poets. Having said thus much 
 on the history and contents of this pub- 
 lication, it will be necessary to add a 
 short account of the writer for the in- 
 struction of those who may be ignorant 
 of his name and character. 
 
 * " Dr. William King, son of the Rev. 
 Peregrine King, was born at Stepney, 
 
 * From Chalmers's Hiogiaphy.
 
 ADVERTISEMENTv IX 
 
 in Middlesex, in 1685 ; and, after a 
 school-education at Salisbury, was en- 
 tered of Baliol College, Oxford, July 9* 
 1701. Proceeding on, the law line, he 
 took his doctor's degree in 1715 j was 
 secretary to the Duke of Ormond and 
 the Earl of Arran, when chancellors of 
 the university ; and was made Principal 
 of St. Mary Hall in 1718. When he was 
 candidate for the university, in 1722, he 
 resigned his office of secretary ; but his 
 other preferment he enjoyed (and it was 
 all he did enjoy) to the time of his death. 
 Dr. Clarke, who opposed him, carried 
 his election ; and, after this disappoint- 
 ment, 1727, he went over to Ireland. 
 With what design he went thither is to 
 us unknown ; but his enemies say, it was 
 for the purposes of intrigue, and to ex- 
 pose himself to sale. But he says him- 
 self, and there are no facts alleged to 
 disprove it, " at no time of my life, either 
 in England or Ireland, either from the
 
 X ADVERTISEMENT. 
 
 present or any former government, have 
 I asked, or endeavoured by any means 
 to obtain, a place, pension, or employ- 
 inent of any kind. I could assign many 
 reasons for my conduct ; but one answer 
 I have always ready : I inherited a patri- 
 mony, which I found sufficient to supply 
 all my wants, and to leave me at liberty 
 to pursue those liberal studies which 
 afforded me the most solid pleasures in 
 my youth, and are the delight and enjoy- 
 ment of my old age. Besides, I always 
 conceived a secret horror of a state of 
 servility and dependence : and I never 
 yet saw a placeman or a courtier, whe- 
 ther in a higher or lower class, whether 
 a priest or a layman, who was his own 
 master.'* During his stay in Ireland, he 
 is said to have written an epic poem, 
 called " The Toast,'* bearing the name 
 of Scheffer, a Laplander, as its author, 
 and of Peregrine O' Donald, esq. as its 
 translator j which was a political satire,
 
 ADVERTISEMENT. XI 
 
 and was printed and given away to 
 friends, but never sold. Dr. Warton 
 says, that the Countess of Newburgh 
 was aimed at in this satire. 
 
 " On the dedication of RadclifFe's li- 
 brary, 1749, he spoke a Latin oration in 
 the theatre at Oxford, which was received 
 with the highest acclamations by a splen- 
 did auditory. Mr. Warton, in "The 
 Triumphs of Isis," pays him a very great 
 compliment on that occasion. But this 
 oration, which was soon after printed, 
 did not meet with such favourable recep- 
 tion from the public; for he was attacked 
 in several pamphlets on account of it, in 
 which he was charged with writing bar- 
 barous Latin, with being disaffected to 
 the government, and that he instigated 
 the younger members of the university 
 to sedition and licentiousness ; very heavy 
 accusations, if we may not candidly sup- 
 pose them dictated by the spirit of male- 
 volence and party zeal. And again, in
 
 Xli ADVERTISEMENT. 
 
 1755, when the memorable election con^ 
 test happened in Oxfordshire, his attach- 
 ment to the old interest drew on him the 
 resentment of the new. He was libelled 
 in newspapers and in pamphlets, and 
 charged with the following particulars, 
 viz. that he was an Irishman j that 
 he had received subscriptions for books 
 never published to the amount of 1500/. 
 of which sum he had defrauded his sub- 
 scribers ; that he had offered himself to 
 sale both in England and Ireland, and 
 was not found worth the purchase ; that 
 he was the writer of " The London Even- 
 ing Post;" the author of a book in Queen 
 Anne's reign, entitled " Political Con- 
 siderations," 1710, in which there was 
 false English ; and of a book then just 
 published, called " The Dreamer," 1754, 
 8vo. At this time he published his 
 " Apology," in 4to. and plausibly vin- 
 dicated himself from the several matters 
 charged on him, except only the last ar-
 
 ADVERTISEMENT. Xiii 
 
 tide, of his being the author of " The 
 Dreamer;" and warmly retaliated on 
 his adversaries. 
 
 " He was the author of, 1. " Miltoni 
 epistola ad PoUionem" (Lord Polwarth). 
 2. " Sermo Pedestris." 3. " Scamnum, 
 ecloga." 4. " Templum libertatis," in 
 three books. 5. " Tres Oratiuncul^.'* 
 6. ** Epistola objurgatoria." 7. " An- 
 tonietti ducis Corscorum epistola ad 
 Corscos de rege eligendo." 8. " Eulo- 
 gium Jacci Etonensis." 9- *' Aviti epis- 
 tola ad Perillam, virginem Scotam,*' &c. 
 10. " Oratiuncula habita in domo convo- 
 cationis Oxon. cum epistola dedicatoria," 
 1757, and " Epitaphium Richardi Nash." 
 Besides these, he published the iirst five 
 volumes of Dr. South's sermons. He 
 was known and esteemed by the first 
 men of his time for wit and learning ; 
 and must be allowed to have been a po- 
 lite scholar, an excellent orator, and an 
 elegant and easy writer, both in Latin
 
 XIV ADVERTISEMENT. 
 
 and English. He died Dec. 30, 1763, 
 having sketched his own character in an 
 elegant epitaph, in which, while he ac- 
 knowledges his failings, he claims the 
 praise of benevolence, temperance, and 
 fortitude. This epitaph was to be en- 
 graved on a silver case, in which he di- 
 rected his heart should be preserved in 
 some convenient part of St. Mary Hall. 
 He was buried in Ealing church, but the 
 inscription is on a marble tablet in the 
 chapel of St. Mary Hall. There is a 
 striking likeness of Dr. King in Wor- 
 lidge's view of the installation of Lord 
 Westmorland as chancellor of Oxford, 
 in 1761." -
 
 PREFACE 
 
 I AM now in my seventy-sixth year, 
 and am often confined by the infirmi- 
 ties which are incident to old age. 
 In some of those hours the following 
 work hath been a part of my amuse- 
 ment; I may properly call it an 
 amusement, because it required no 
 study, nor any continued application ; 
 for, as it consists of detached pieces, 
 a kind of table-talk, 1 could there- 
 fore lay it aside and return to it 
 when I pleased. Most of the anec-
 
 XVI PREFACE. 
 
 dotes which I have inserted are 
 from my own knowledge; the rest 
 were related to me by those friends 
 on whose honour and veracity I can 
 depend. As to the observations 
 which I have made on hmnan life, 
 the reflections on men and manners, 
 and the remarks on books and au- 
 thors, they are my present senti- 
 ments, which I have delivered with 
 an honest freedom, without pretend- 
 ing, however, to control the judg- 
 ment or opinion of any other person.
 
 ANECDOTES, ^c. 
 
 jiEquanimity, or the cequus animus of 
 Horace, which is neither elated by pro- 
 sperity, nor depressed by any adverse 
 fortune, is constitutional, and not to be 
 acquired by philosophy or religion. 
 
 I am likewise of opinion, that what we 
 call Human Prudence is born with us ; 
 though I confess, it may be greatly as- 
 sisted and improved by experience and 
 observation. 
 
 A benevolent man, endowed with hu- 
 man prudence and with that equality of
 
 2 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 mind I have before mentioned, consti- 
 tutes his own happiness, conciliates the 
 affection of all about him, and may al- 
 ways be the most useful member in any 
 society. But a man, in whom these qua- 
 lities are united, is scarce to be found 
 amongst half a million : and in the course 
 of a long life I cannot recollect more 
 than one or two examples. 
 
 I have an equal mind, and generally 
 very good spirits ; and, if I do not mis- 
 take myself, I have a good heart : but I 
 have a very small portion of human pru- 
 dence. And for want of this excellent 
 quality, I have twice in my life lost the 
 opportunity of acquiring a very large 
 fortune in the most irreproachable man- 
 ner. It has been owing to the same de- 
 fect that my patrimony hath been so ill
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. ^ 
 
 managed, and so much impaired. I have 
 run myself into many inconveniences. 
 I have made enemies when I did not in- 
 tend to give the least offence, and I have 
 suffered much by family misfortunes ; all 
 which a little human sagacity and fore- 
 sight would easily have prevented. How- 
 ever let me be ever thankful to Divine 
 Providence, that I have never wanted 
 the necessaries, nor even the comforts of 
 life : and what has given me a very sin- 
 gular pleasure, I have always been able 
 to spare something to assist a poor 
 friend. 
 
 The King of Arragon made a very 
 good judgment of human life when he 
 said. There were only four things in the 
 world worth living for, Old wine to 
 
 B !2
 
 4 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 DRINK, OLD WOOD TO BURN, OLD BOOKS 
 TO READ, and OLD FRIENDS TO CONVERSE 
 
 WITH. And a greater king than Alphon- 
 sus, after having enjoyed all the plea- 
 sures and the utmost felicity this world 
 was capable of providing for him, pro- 
 nounced the whole to be Vanity. I 
 have asked many of my acquaintance 
 this question, Whether, if a power of 
 living their lives over again were granted 
 to them, they would accept it? and I 
 never heard one man of sense answer in 
 the affirmative. Select a person, who, 
 according to the estimate of human hap- 
 piness, is the happiest of all mortals, 
 who in appearance is possessed of every 
 thing that can satisfy his senses or gra- 
 tify his passions, I will venture to affirm, 
 that he is in pursuit of something, which
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. o 
 
 is at a great distance from him, and when 
 he has obtained it, he will want some- 
 thing else, which perhaps he never can 
 obtain. But if his good fortune should 
 reach this last something, which is to 
 complete his felicity, then ask him again 
 if he would be willing to go back to his 
 infancy, and act the very same parts in 
 life a second time ; and I much doubt 
 whether he would undertake the labour, 
 although he were to be rewarded at the 
 end of it with Mahomet's paradise*. 
 
 * Since I wrote this, I perceive that the learned M. 
 
 Maupertuis hath confirmed my opinion. Who, says 
 he, tvould choose to live his life over again, and to pass 
 through the same individual scenes 't/ The author of 
 a book published last year, entitled Various Pro- 
 spects of Mankind, Nature, and Providence, 
 endeavours to answer this question and confute M. 
 Maupertuis's proposition. His answer is inge- 
 nious, but very unsatisfactory. He reasons from
 
 6 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 I HOPE that I shall not offend ortho- 
 doxy, as it is not inconsistent with the 
 religion which I profess, if I assert, that 
 this world is a place of punishment, as 
 well as a place of trial ; which is a pro- 
 position, I think, that will almost admit 
 of a mathematical demonstration. 
 
 A PRESENCE OF MIND is SL vcry rare, 
 but a very happy and useful talent, and 
 is a certain guard against many mischiefs 
 and inconveniences, to which human life 
 is continually exposed. It is something 
 very different from impudence, or a 
 vain assurance. A presence of mind 
 is always well-bred, and is generally 
 
 data which cannot be allowed him. A better argu- 
 ment than any he hath used would have been to 
 assure his readers. That he himself would be glad 
 to live his life over again.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 7 
 
 accompanied with wit and courage. 
 Amongst all my acquaintance I cannot 
 recollect more than three persons who 
 were eminently possessed of this quality. 
 Dr. Atterbury, Bishop of Rochester, 
 the Earl of Stairs, who was our ambas- 
 sador in France the beginning of the 
 last reign, and Dr. James Monro, who 
 was many years physician of Bethlem 
 hospital. 
 
 In 1715 I dined with the Duke of 
 Ormonde at Richmond. We were four- 
 teen at table. There was my Lord 
 Marr, my Lord Jersey, my Lord Ar- 
 RAN, my Lord Landsdown, Sir William 
 Wyndham, Sir Redmond Everard, and 
 Atterbury, Bishop of Rochester. The 
 rest of the company I do not exactly re- 
 member. During the dinner there was
 
 8 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 a jocular dispute (I forget how it was 
 introduced) concerning short prayers. 
 Sir William Wyndham told us, that the 
 shortest prayer he had ever heard was 
 the prayer of a common soldier just be- 
 fore the battle of Blenheim^ * O God^ if 
 there be a God, save my soul, if I have a 
 soul!* This was followed by a general 
 laugh. I immediately reflected that such 
 a treatment of the subject was too ludi- 
 crous, at least very improper, where a 
 learned and religious prelate was one of 
 the company. But I had soon an oppor- 
 tunity of making a different reflection. 
 Atterbury, seeming to join in the con- 
 versation, and applying himself to Sir 
 William Wyndham, said " Your prayer, 
 Sir William, is indeed very short : but I 
 remember another as short, but a much
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 9 
 
 better, offered up likewise by a poor 
 soldier in the same circumstances, * O 
 Godt if in the day of battle I forget thee, 
 do thou not forget me r " This, as Atter- 
 BURY pronounced it with his usual grace 
 and dignity, was a very gentle and polite 
 reproof, and was immediately felt by the 
 whole company. And the Duke of Or- 
 monde, who was the best bred man of 
 his age, suddenly turned the discourse 
 to another subject. 
 
 Cardinal Polignac, the author of 
 the Anti Lucretius, was a fine gentleman, 
 as well as an elegant and polite scholar. 
 He had a most engaging affability, and 
 a peculiar art and manner of obliging 
 every man, who was introduced to him, 
 to lay aside all restraint. I had not been
 
 10 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 with him a quarter of an hour, when I 
 found myself as easy as if I had been 
 educated in his family. We had some 
 talk of his Anti Lucretius, and I took 
 that opportunity of complimenting him 
 upon a small specimen of that work, 
 which had been published in the Biblio- 
 theque ChoisiSf or some other of the lite- 
 rary journals. " That specimen," said 
 the Cardinal, " which you have read, 
 was published by Monsieur Le Clerc. 
 He importuned me for a sight of my 
 MS. which I refused him, as I had al- 
 ways resolved that this poem should not 
 appear till after my death. However, to 
 gratify Le Clerc's curiosity, I repeated 
 to him those verses (about 150), which 
 he hath published. I repeated them 
 once only ; and yet he was able to carry
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. H 
 
 them away in his memory, although he 
 was then seventy years old." I should 
 have inclined to believe that the Car- 
 dinal had been deceived, and that Le 
 Clerc had by some means got at the 
 MS. if I had not known in my own fa- 
 mily a most amazing instance of the 
 strength of memory. 
 
 The Cardinal observing that during 
 dinner I drank only water, and being 
 told I never drank any other liquor, 
 said, turning to me, " Whilst I was am- 
 bassador at Rome, and since my return 
 to France, I have entertained more than 
 five hundred of your countrymen, and 
 you are the only water-drinker I have 
 found in the whole number." This was 
 in September 1737. There is an excel- 
 lent print of the Cardinal, engraved by 
 Chereau, from a picture of .
 
 12 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 A MAN, who has contracted the perni- 
 cious habit of drinking drams, is con- 
 scious that he is taking in a slow poison, 
 and therefore he will never own it either 
 to his friend or his physician, though it 
 is visible to all his acquaintance. Pope 
 and I, with my Lord Orrery and Sir 
 Harry Bedingfield, dined with the 
 late Earl of Burlington. After the 
 first course Pope grew sick, and went 
 out of the room. When dinner was 
 ended, and the cloth removed, my Lord 
 Burlington said he would go out, and 
 see what was become of Pope. And 
 soon after they returned together. But 
 Pope, who had been casting up his din- 
 ner, looked very pale, and complained 
 much. My Lord asked him if he would 
 have some mulled wine or a glass of old 
 sack, which Pope refused. I told my
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 13 
 
 Lord Burlington that he wanted a 
 dram. Upon which the little man ex- 
 pressed some resentment against me, and 
 said he would not taste any spirits, and 
 that he abhorred drams as much as I 
 did. However I persisted, and assured 
 my Lord Burlington that he could not 
 oblige our friend more at that instant 
 than by ordering a large gla^|*of cherry- 
 brandy to be set before him. This was 
 done, and in less than half an hour, while 
 my Lord was acquainting us with an af- 
 fair which engaged our attention. Pope 
 had sipped up all the brandy. Pope's 
 frame of body did not promise long life ; 
 but he certainly hastened his death by 
 feeding much on high-seasoned dishes, 
 and drinking spirits.
 
 14 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 A PRESBYTERIAN tCEcher, OF OHC de- 
 signed for the office, though he changes 
 his condition, and has an opportunity of 
 conversing with the politest men in the 
 kingdom, yet he will always retain his 
 original cant. Chandler, the popish 
 Bishop of London, and Secker, Bishop 
 of Orford, are both converts from pres- 
 bytery. They are frequent preachers; 
 but the cant of their education renders 
 their discourses very disagreeable to a 
 good ear. Their parts are moderate, 
 and nearly equal; but their characters 
 are very different. Chandler is a real 
 convert, and as void of all hypocrisy as 
 he is free from pride and ambition. 
 
 Praise is the strongest satire, and the 
 most pleasing : but it requires great art
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 15 
 
 and judgment to manage and conduct an 
 irony. I once said, talking on this sub- 
 ject with Dr. Swift, that the Rhapsody 
 was the best satire he had ever com- 
 posed. He assured me that immediately 
 after this poem was published, he re- 
 ceived a message of thanks from the 
 whole ******, This I can 
 easily conceive, as irony is not a figure 
 in the German Rhetoric. If Mr. Pope 
 in the place, where he calls Lord Cob- 
 ham a coward, had complimented a 
 German Colonel with the same appella- 
 tion, my little friend, I fear, would have 
 
 fared very ill The Rhapsody would 
 
 probably have continued to Dr. Swift 
 the favour which it had acquired him, if 
 Lord Harvey had not undeceived Q. C. 
 and taken some pains to teach her the 
 use and power of the irony.
 
 16 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 The last time I dined with Dean 
 Swift, which was about tliree years be- 
 fore he fell into that distemper which 
 totally deprived him of his understand- 
 ing, I observed, that he was affected by 
 the wine which he drank, about a pint 
 of claret. The next morning, as we 
 were walking together in his garden, he 
 complained much of his head, when I 
 took the liberty to tell him (for I most 
 sincerely loved him) that I was afraid he 
 drank too much wine. He was a little 
 startled, and answered, " that as to his 
 drinking he had always looked on him- 
 self as a very temperate man ; for he 
 never exceeded the quantity which his 
 physician had allowed and prescribed 
 him." Now his physician never drank 
 less than two bottles of claret after his 
 dinner.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 17 
 
 ; The Earl of Chesterfield, who 
 some years ago resigned his employment 
 of Secretary of State, because he would 
 .not submit to be a cypher in his office, 
 and work under a man who had not an 
 hundredth part of his knowledge and un- 
 derstanding, resolved to meddle no more 
 in public affairs. However he was lately 
 so much disgusted with our bad mea- 
 sures, that he could not help animadvert- 
 ing on them, though in his usual calm 
 and polite manner. His petition to the 
 King is an excellent satire, and hath dis- 
 covered to the whole nation how, at a 
 time when we are oppressed with taxes, 
 and the common people every where 
 grown mutinous for want of bread, the 
 public money is squandered away in pen- 
 sions, generally bestowed upon the most
 
 18 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 worthless men. I fancy it was this 
 witty petition which furnished the Irish 
 parliament with the hint of forming so 
 many honest resolutions concerning the 
 great number of pensions, with which 
 that kingdom is loaded. 
 
 We are never grieved when a man of 
 merit, or any one, who has done the 
 least service to his country, is rewarded 
 out of the public treasure : but we can- 
 not without great indignation behold a 
 sum of money sufficient to maintain a 
 large hospital given annually to one 
 great Lord to support his luxury, and to 
 another to gratify his avarice. I am 
 well assured that the present D. of D. 
 has received more than two hundred 
 thousand pounds in places and pensions 
 since the accession of King George I.,
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES, 19 
 
 and yet it would be difficult to prove 
 that this man had ever done any service 
 or honour either to his country or his 
 benefactor. Upon reading my Lord 
 Chesterfield's petition, I sent him this 
 compliment ; 
 
 Quae venit ^ coelo monitoris epistola Phoebi, 
 Dicimus banc satirara, culte Philippe, tuam. 
 
 lUe etiam Phoebo fortasse simillimus esset. 
 Qui rex indignis munera nulla daret. 
 
 Who amongst all the modern writers 
 is to be more esteemed and admired 
 than Monsieur Fenelon, Archbishop of 
 Camhrayy and author of Telemachus ; 
 whose piety, politeness and humanity, 
 were equal to his great learning ? Ram- 
 say, the author of CyruSj who was edu- 
 cated in Monsieur Fenelon*s family, 
 acquainted me with an anecdote, which 
 
 c 2
 
 20 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 hath ever made me reverence the me- 
 mory of this excellent man. Some Ger- 
 man officers, who were prisoners at Cam' 
 bray, were invited to dine with the 
 Archbishop, whose table was always open 
 to the officers of the French Garrison, of 
 which a certain number dined with him 
 every day. The Germans during the din- 
 ner were continually calling for bumpers 
 of wine. The French seemed to sneer at 
 this behaviour of the German officers, and 
 looked on them with a kind of contempt: 
 which Monsieur Fenelon observing, 
 called for an half-pint glass of Burgundy, 
 (which perhaps was more than he had 
 ever taken at one meal before), and 
 drank it off to the health of the prisoners. 
 This was a handsome compliment to the 
 Germans^ and a proper reprimand to his
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 21 
 
 own countrymen. But as soon as the 
 German officers were gone, he thus ad- 
 monished the French gentlemen. " You 
 should endeavour to divest yourselves 
 of all national prejudices, and never con- 
 demn the customs and manners of a fo- 
 reign people, because they are altogether 
 different from your own. I am a true 
 French-m2iX\, and love my country; but I 
 love mankind better than my country." 
 
 The Duke of Orleans, who was 
 regent of France during the minority of 
 the present King Lewis the XVth, was 
 most debauched in his life and aban- 
 doned in his morals. And yet he ap- 
 peared to be a prince of great humanity, 
 and a lover of public justice. When 
 Count Horn was sentenced to be broke
 
 22 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 on the wheel, Duke D*Aremberg, and 
 the whole family of Horn, applied to the 
 Regent for a pardon. But not succeed- 
 ing in this attempt, and finding the Re- 
 gent inflexible, they requested that the 
 Count's sentence might only be changed, 
 and to avoid an ignominious death, which 
 would be a lasting stain in the whole fa- 
 mily, that he might have the favour of 
 being beheaded. But this likewise the 
 Regent refused, and made this answer : 
 " Count Horn is my relation as well as 
 yours : but the infamy is not in the pu- 
 nishment, but in the crime." When the 
 Prince of * * * * solicited the Regent 
 to pardon a murder, which he had com- 
 mitted, after having been pardoned for 
 the same crime once or twice before j " I 
 will pardon you," says the Regent, " but
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 23 
 
 take notice and keep this in your me- 
 mory, I will certainly pardon the man, 
 whoever he be, that kills you." This 
 monitory had a proper effect, and put a 
 stop to the barbarities of this Bourbon 
 Prince, who presumed that his quality 
 of Prince of the blood was a licence for 
 murder. These two answers of the Re- 
 gent of France deserve to be written in 
 letters of gold. 
 
 Most of the commentators on the 
 Greek and Roman poets think it suf- 
 ficient to explain their author, and to give 
 us the various readings. Some few in- 
 deed have made us remark the excellency 
 of the poet's plan, the elegance of his 
 diction, and the propriety of his thoughts, 
 at the same time pointing out as ex-
 
 24 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 amples the most striking and beautiful 
 descriptions. Ru^us in his comment 
 on Virgil certainly excelled all his fel- 
 low-labourers, who were appointed to ex- 
 plain and publish a series of the Roman 
 classics for the use of the Dauphin. 
 His mythological, historical, and geo- 
 graphical notes are a great proof of his 
 learning and diligence. But he hath not 
 entered into the spirit of the author, and 
 displayed the great art and judgment of 
 the poet, particularly his knowledge of 
 men and manners. The learned Jesuit 
 perhaps imagined that remarks of this 
 sort were foreign to the employment of a 
 commentator, or for some political rea- 
 sons he might think proper to omit them. 
 And yet, in my opinion, nothing could 
 have been more instructive and entertain'
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 25 
 
 ing, as his comment was chiefly designed 
 for the use of a young prince. The 
 jEneid furnishes us with many examples 
 to the purpose I mention. However, that 
 I may be the better understood, the fol- 
 lowing remark will explain my meaning. 
 In the beginning of the first book Juno 
 makes a visit to JEolus, and desires him 
 to raise a storm and destroy the Trojan 
 fleet, because she hated the whole nation 
 on account of the judgment of FariSy or, 
 as she was pleased to express herself, 
 because the Trojans were her enemies. 
 Gens inimica mihiy &c. Juno was con- 
 scious that she asked a god to oblige her 
 by an act which was both unjust and 
 cruel, and therefore she accompanied her 
 request with the offer of Deiopeia, the 
 most beautiful nymph in her train: a
 
 26 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 powerful bribe, and such as she imagined 
 jEoIus could not resist. She was not 
 disappointed : JEolus accepted her offer, 
 and executed her commands as far as he 
 was able. What I have to observe here, 
 in the first place, is the necessity of that 
 short speech, in which Juno addresses 
 herself to JEolus. She had no time to 
 lose. The Trojan fleet was in the Tus- 
 can sea, sailing with a fair wind, and 
 in a few hours would probably have 
 been in a safe harbour. jEolus there- 
 fore answered in as few words as the 
 goddess had addressed herself to him. 
 But his answer is very curious. He 
 takes no notice of the offer of Deiopeia, 
 for whom upon any other occasion he 
 would have thanked Juno upon his knees. 
 But now, when she was given, and ac-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 27 
 
 cepted by him as a bribe, and as the 
 wages of cruelty and injustice, he endea- 
 voured by his answer to avoid that im- 
 putation, and pretended he had such a 
 grateful sense of the favours which Juno 
 had formerly conferred on him, when 
 she introduced him to Jupiter s, table, 
 that it was his duty to obey her com^ 
 mands on all occasions : 
 
 Tuus', Q Regina, quod optes, 
 Explorare labor ; inihi jussa capessere fas est. 
 
 And thus insinuated even to Juno her- 
 self, that this was the sole motive of his 
 ready compliance with her request. I 
 am here put in mind of something si- 
 milar, which happened in Sir Robert 
 Walpole's administration. He wanted 
 to carry a question in the House of Com- 
 mons, to which he knew there would be
 
 28 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 great opposition, and which was disliked 
 by some of his own dependents. As he 
 was passing through the Court of Re- 
 quests', he met a member of the contrary 
 party, whose avarice he imagined would 
 not reject a large bribe. He took him 
 aside, and said, " Such a question comes 
 on this day ; give me your vote, and here 
 is a bank bill of 2000/.," which he put 
 into his hands. The member made him 
 this answer. " Sir Robert, you have 
 lately served some of my particular 
 friends; and when my wife was last at 
 court, the King was very gracious to 
 her, which must have happened at your 
 instance. I should therefore think my- 
 self very ungrateful (^putting the hank 
 hill into his pocket^ if I were to refuse 
 the favour you are now pleased to ask
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 29 
 
 me." This incident, if wrought up by 
 a man of humour, would make a pleasant 
 scene in a political farce. But to return 
 to Virgil. The short conference between 
 Juno and JEolus is a sufficient proof of 
 the poet's excellent judgment. It de- 
 monstrates his knowledge of the world, 
 and more particularly his acquaintance 
 with the customs and manners of a great 
 prince's court. Hence we may learn that 
 a bribe, if it be large enough, and sea- 
 sonably offered, will frequently overcome 
 the virtue and resolution of persons of 
 the highest rank, and that the power of 
 love and beauty will sometimes corrupt 
 a god, and compel him to discover a 
 weakness unworthy of a man. 
 
 I HAVE A VENERATION for ViRGIL :
 
 30 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 I admire Horace: but I love Ovid. 
 The Georgics is perhaps the most finished 
 poem of all which are now extant in any 
 language. The Odes of Horace are a 
 master-piece, and beautiful beyond de- 
 scription : where he has imitated Pindar 
 (which he has done, I think, but once in 
 the beginning of that ode Quern virum 
 aut Heroa, &c.) he has evidently ex- 
 celled him. But neither of these great 
 poets knew how to move the passions so 
 well as Ovid ; witness some of the tales 
 of his Metamorphoses, particularly the 
 story of Ceyx and Halcyone^ which I 
 never read without weeping. The Medea 
 of Ovid is a great loss. I persuade my- 
 self if this work, which all the ancients 
 have so highly commended, was now ex- 
 tant, it would bear the palm from all our
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 31 
 
 modern tragedies, whether French or 
 English, No judicious critic hath ever 
 yet denied that Ovid has more wit than 
 any other poet of the Augustan age. 
 That he has too much, and that his fancy 
 is too luxuriant, is the fault generally 
 imputed to him. This he would probably 
 have corrected, if he had had the liberty 
 of reviewing his Metamorphoses: 
 Emendaturus, si licuisset, erat. 
 But, methinks, I am much better 
 pleased that this did not happen, since 
 by varying, and expressing the same 
 thought in a different manner, this poet 
 hath left us a standing proof of the 
 copiousness and elegance of the Latin 
 tongue. This is of great use to our 
 youth in learning Latin, and indeed to 
 all who attempt to write in that Ian-
 
 32 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 guage. What would I give for the chip- 
 pings of the jEneid ? For we are told 
 that Tucca and Varius cut off from that 
 poem as much as they left, before it 
 was offered to the public. All the im- 
 perfections of Ovid are really pleasing. 
 But who would not excuse all his faults 
 on account of his many excellencies, 
 particularly his descriptions, which have 
 never been equalled ? 
 
 Courage, in which I include a for- 
 titude of mind as well as personal bra- 
 very, should not be wanting in any per- 
 son who is engaged in the public service, 
 whether he be in a civil or military sta- 
 tion, or who has formed a design of ac- 
 quiring either. Without courage a man 
 of the greatest abilities and integrity will
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 33 
 
 scarce be able to preserve his character, 
 and in some exigencies to save his person. 
 His prudence will frequently be con- 
 founded, and his honesty will be warped 
 by his fears. The late Lord Bolen- 
 BROKE, so well known by his writings, 
 executed his employment of Secretary of 
 State with great address and sufficiency. 
 When after Queen Anne*s death he was 
 impeached of high treason, Sir Thomas 
 Hare, his under secretary, secreted all 
 the papers of any consequence, before 
 the office was searched. But my Lord 
 Bolenbroke, after thanking Sir Thomas 
 Hare and acknowledging the greatest 
 obligations to him, as to one who had 
 preserved him, was induced either by 
 the fair promises or the menaces of Mr. 
 Stanhope *, to resign all these papers 
 * See Parke's Preface to Bolingbroke's Letters.
 
 34 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 into the hands of the secret committee, 
 and thus furnished them with materials 
 whereon to ground all the articles of his 
 impeachment. If Lord Bolenbroke had 
 had the firmness and resolution of the 
 Earl of Oxford, he would not have 
 been forced into banishment, and been 
 deprived of his estate and honours. 
 
 The late Duke of Wharton had very 
 bright parts, a great vivacity, a quick 
 apprehension, a ready wit and a natural 
 eloquence, and all improved by an ex- 
 cellent education. I do not believe that 
 any young nobleman, on his first entrance 
 into the House of Lords, hath appeared 
 with such advantage. His speech in 
 defence of Dr. Atterbury, Bishop of 
 Rochestevy was heard with universal ap- 
 plause and admiration, and was indeed
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 35 
 
 not unworthy of the oldest and most 
 accomplished senator, or the most able 
 and eloquent lawyer in either House of 
 Parliament. So that he might have pro- 
 mised himself the first employments in 
 the kingdom : and he had no small share 
 of ambition. But he defeated his own 
 designs. He had no prudence or eco- 
 nomy ; and he wanted personal courage. 
 The last however would probably have 
 been concealed, if he had been a sober 
 man. But he drank immoderately, and 
 was very abusive, and sometimes very 
 mischievous in his wine ; so that he drew 
 on himself frequent challenges, which he 
 would never answer. On other accounts, 
 likewise, his character was become very 
 prostitute. So that having lost his ho- 
 nour, he left his country.
 
 36 DR. KING'S ANECDO'reS 
 
 Since the beginning of the present 
 war, Admiral Bing was condemned to 
 death by one court-martial, and my Lord 
 George Sackville was disgraced by an- 
 other. But both were acquitted of the 
 crime of cowardice. And yet this is 
 the only charge brought against them 
 both before and since their trials, by the 
 voice of the people. If I were com- 
 pelled to deliver my own opinion, I 
 should think myself better justified in 
 adding my vote to the cry of the mul- 
 titude, than concurring in the sentence 
 of either of the court-martials. 
 
 Colonel Cecil, who was agent for 
 the Chevalier St. George, and suc- 
 ceeded my Lord Orrery, the father of 
 the present Earl of Corke, in that office.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 37 
 
 had a weak judgment, and was very illi- 
 terate, and in many other respects was 
 wholly unqualified for such a delicate 
 commission. I believe he was a man of 
 honour, and yet he betrayed his master. 
 For he suffered himself to be cajoled and 
 duped by Sir Robert Walpole to such 
 a degree, as to be fully persuaded that 
 Sir Robert had formed a design to re- 
 store the House of Stuart. For this 
 reason he communicated to Sir Robert 
 all his despatches, and there was not a 
 scheme which the Chevalier's court or 
 the Jacobites in England had projected 
 during Sir Robert's long administration, 
 of which that minister was not early 
 informed, and was therefore able to de- 
 feat it without any noise or expense. 
 The Duchess of Buckingham, who was
 
 38 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 closely connected with Cecil, had made 
 two or three journeys to Versailles in 
 order to persuade Cardinal Fleury. 
 But she got nothing from the Cardinal 
 but compliments and civil excuses, and 
 was laught at by both courts for her 
 pompous manner of travelling, in which 
 she affected the state of a sovereign 
 prince. It is no wonder that this 
 woman, who was half-mad, was induced 
 by Cecil to entertain the same favour- 
 able opinion with himself of Sir Robert 
 Walpole, and consequently all the let- 
 ters and instructions which she received 
 from Rome were without reserve com- 
 municated to him. He was at last so 
 much in her good graces, that she of- 
 fered to marry him, which Sir Robert 
 very civilly declined. However, to tes-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 39 
 
 tify her good opinion of him, she ap- 
 pointed him one of her executors. After 
 Sir Robert Walpole's resignation, the 
 new ministry ordered Cecil, whose 
 agency was well known, to be taken into 
 custody, which gave Sir Robert the oc- 
 casion of saying to some of his friends, 
 that the government had taken up the 
 man from whom he had received all his 
 information of the Jacobite measures. 
 
 It is certain, that all our national 
 misfortunes since the accession of the 
 House of Hanover must be chiefly 
 ascribed to Walpole's administration. 
 He unhinged all the principles and 
 morals of our people, and changed the 
 government into a system of corruption. 
 He openly ridiculed virtue and merit, 
 and promoted no man to any employ-
 
 40 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 ment of profit or honour, who had scru- 
 ples of conscience, or refused implicitly 
 to obey his commands. He was a ready 
 speaker, understood the business of par- 
 liament, and knew how to manage an 
 House of Commons, which however was 
 not a very difficult task, if it be considered 
 that a majority of the members were of 
 his own nomination. He seemed to have 
 great resolution ; and yet he was once 
 so much intimidated by the clamours 
 of the people without doors, that he 
 thought it expedient to give up one of 
 his most favourite schemes. He had 
 besides some difficulties to encoiuiter 
 through his whole administration, whicli 
 were not known to the public. A friend 
 of mine wlio dined with him one day 
 fSte-d'icle took occasion to compliment
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 41 
 
 him on the great honour and power 
 which he enjoyed as prime minister. 
 ** Doctor,** says he, " I have great power, 
 it is true : but I have two cursed draw- 
 backs, Hanover^ and the * * * avarice,'* 
 This minister, who thought he had esta- 
 blished himself beyond a possibility of 
 being shaken, fell at last by his too 
 great security : if he may be said to fall, 
 who went out of employment with an 
 Earldom and a pension of 4000/, or 
 5000/. a year. 
 
 Some very worthy gentlemen and true 
 lovers of their country were inclined to 
 pray for the continuance of Sir Robert's 
 ministry, as the old woman prayed for 
 the life of Dionysius the tyrant. They 
 judged that his successors would be 
 worse ministers, and worse men ; that
 
 42 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 they would pursue his measures without 
 his abilities : and the event has verified 
 their prediction. 
 
 No INCIDENT in this reign astonished 
 us so much as the conduct of my Lord 
 Bath, who chose to receive his honours 
 as the wages of iniquity, which he might 
 have had as the reward of virtue. By 
 his opposition to a mal-administration 
 for near twenty years, he had contracted 
 an universal esteem, and was considered 
 as the chief bulwark and protector of 
 the British liberties. By the fall of 
 Walpole, he enjoyed for some days a 
 kind of sovereign power. During this 
 interval, it was expected that he would 
 have formed a patriot ministry, and have 
 put the public affairs in such a train as 
 would necessarily, in a very short time.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 43 
 
 have repaired all the breaches in our 
 constitution. But how were we de- 
 ceived! He deserted the cause of his 
 country: he betrayed his friends and 
 adherents : he ruined his character ; and 
 from a most glorious eminence sunk 
 down to a degree of contempt. The 
 first time Sir Robert (who was now 
 Earl of Orford) met him in the House 
 of Lords, he threw out this reproach : 
 *' My Lord Bath, you and I are now 
 two as insignificant men as any in Eng' 
 land.** In which he spoke the truth 
 of my Lord Bath, but not of himself. 
 For my Lord Orford was consulted by 
 the ministers to the last day of his life. 
 
 Mr. W. Levison, my Lord Gower's 
 brother, told me that he happened to be
 
 44 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 in the House of Lords, and standing 
 next Sir Robert Walpole, when there 
 was a warm debate concerning some mi- 
 nisterial measures. In the midst of the 
 debate says Sir Robert to him ; " You 
 see with what zeal and vehemence these 
 gentlemen oppose, and yet I know the 
 price of every man in this House ex- 
 cept three, and your brotlier is one of 
 them." Sir Robert was frequently very 
 unguarded in his expressions : for nothing 
 certainly could have been thrown out 
 more injurious to the honour of the 
 House of Lords. Besides, this was an 
 open confession of his manner of govern- 
 ing, and to what a great height he had 
 carried corruption. 
 
 Sir Robert lived long enough to
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 45 
 
 know that my Lord Gower had his 
 price as well as the rest, and was un- 
 worthy of forming his triumvirate. 
 
 My Lord Gower's defection was a 
 great blow to the Tory party, and a sin- 
 gular disappointment to all his friends. 
 For no one had entertained the least 
 jealousy or suspicion of this part of his 
 conduct. He had such an honest and 
 open countenance as would have de- 
 ceived the most skilful physiognomist. 
 He was not a lover of money, nor did 
 he seem ambitious of any thing, but 
 true glory ; and that he enjoyed. For 
 no man within my memory was more 
 esteemed and reverenced. He declared 
 his principles very freely, and all his 
 actions were correspondent. The Tories 
 considered liim as their chief: they
 
 46 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 placed the greatest confidence in him, 
 and did nothing without his advice 
 and approbation. They even persuaded 
 themselves that he had an excellent 
 judgment and understanding, though his 
 parts were very moderate, and his learn- 
 ing superficial. But he was affable and 
 courteous ; and he had a certain plausi- 
 bility, which, with a candour of manners, 
 supplied the place of superior talents. 
 He had a large estate, and was celebrated 
 by all his neighbours for his hospitality. 
 And he was as much respected for his 
 private as he was for his public virtues. 
 He was a good husband, a good father, 
 and a good master. When he accepted 
 the privy seal, he used all his art to pre- 
 serve the good opinion of his old friends. 
 He assured them, that he went into em-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 47 
 
 ployment with no other view than to 
 serve his country, and that many articles 
 tending to a thorough reformation were 
 already stipulated. I had a letter from 
 him (for I lived in some degree of inti- 
 macy with him for many years) to the 
 purposes I have mentioned. Soon after 
 I saw him, when he read the articles to 
 me. If I rightly remember, they were 
 thirteen in number : not one of which 
 was performed, or ever intended to be 
 performed. When this was at length 
 discovered, he laid aside his disguise, 
 adhering to the new system, and openly 
 renouncing his old principles. He was 
 then created an Earl: and this feather 
 was the only reward of his apostacy. 
 For all the money which he received 
 from his place did not refund him half
 
 48 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 the sum (as he himself confessed) which 
 he had expended to support the mea- 
 sures of the administration. Such was 
 the conduct of this unhappy man, who 
 for a shadow bartered a most respectable 
 character, and sacrificed his honour and 
 his country. After this he never enjoyed 
 any peace of mind, and it is no wonder 
 if he died of what we call a broken 
 heart. 
 
 I WAS INVITED to dine at the late 
 Earl of Marchmont's, where I found 
 the present Earl and his brother, my 
 Lord Stairs, Sir Luke Schaub, and 
 four or live ladies. The conversation 
 during dinner (occasioned by something 
 which had just then happened at court) 
 turned upon the Q 's love of money.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 49 
 
 Every one, except Sir Luke Schaub, 
 had a story on this subject : and some of 
 them were very unbecoming sacred ma- 
 jesty. Sir Luke, who was a pensioned 
 courtier, thought himself obliged to de- 
 fend the Q 's honour, and said to me, 
 
 who sat next him : " Doctor, there is 
 not more than one of these scandalous 
 tales in a hundred that is true." " Then, 
 Sir Luke," I replied, " you acknowledge 
 that one in a hundred is true." He 
 immediately perceived his error : and 
 one of the company observed, " that if 
 only one in a hundred of such stories 
 as had been related were true, there 
 would not be any great injustice in im- 
 puting all the rest." It might perhaps 
 be too severe a censure to charge a 
 woman with unchastity, who had only
 
 60 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 transgressed with one man ; but a base 
 and sordid spirit is discovered by one 
 act of avarice. 
 
 The custom of giving money to ser- 
 vants is now become such a grievance, 
 that it seems to demand the interposition 
 of the legislature to abolish it. How 
 much are foreigners astonished, when 
 they observe that a man cannot dine at 
 any house in England^ not even with his 
 father or his brother, or with any other 
 of his nearest relations, or most intimate 
 friends and companions, unless he pay 
 for his dinner ! But how can they behokl 
 without indignation or contempt a man 
 of quality standing by his guests, while 
 they are distributing money to a double 
 row of his servants ? If, when I am in-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. -^1 
 
 vited to dine with any of my acquaint- 
 ance, I were to send the master of the 
 house a sirloin of beef for a present, it 
 would be considered as a gross affront ; 
 and yet as soon as I shall have dined, 
 or before I leave the house, I must be 
 obliged to pay for the sirloin, which was 
 brought to his table, or placed on the 
 sideboard. For I contend that all the 
 money which is bestowed on the ser- 
 vants is given to the master. For if the 
 servants wages were increased in some 
 proportion to their vails (which is the 
 practice of a few great families, the D. 
 of Norfolk's, Mr. Spencer's, Sir Fran- 
 cis Dashwood's, &c.), this scandalous 
 custom might be totally extinguished. 
 I remember a Lord Poor, a Roman 
 Catholic Peer of Ireland, who lived upon 
 
 E 2
 
 52 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 a small pension which Q. Anne had 
 granted liim : he was a man of honour, 
 and well esteemed; and had formerly 
 been an officer of some distinction in the 
 service of France. The Duke of Or- 
 monde had often invited him to dinner, 
 and he as often excused himself At 
 last the Duke kindly expostulated with 
 him, and would know the reason why he 
 so constantly refused to be one of his 
 guests. My Lord Poor then honestly 
 confessed that he could not afford it : 
 '* but," says he, " if your Grace will put 
 a guinea into my hands as often as you 
 are pleased to invite me to dine, I will 
 not decline the honour of waiting on 
 you." This was done ; and my Lord 
 was afterwards a frequent guest in St. 
 James's Square. For my part, whenever
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 53 
 
 I am invited to the table of any of my 
 noble friends, I have the vanity to imagine 
 that my company is desired for the sake 
 of my conversation; and there is cer- 
 tainly no reason why I should give the 
 servants money because I give the mas- 
 ter pleasure. Besides, I have observed 
 the servants of every great house con- 
 sider these vails to be as much their due 
 as the fees which are claimed in the Cus- 
 tom-house, or in any other public office. 
 And therefore they make no distinction 
 between a gentleman of 200/. a year, 
 and one of 2000/. ; although they look 
 on the former as inferior in every re- 
 spect to themselves. Maxima quceque 
 domus servis est plena siiperbis is an 
 axiom which will hold true to the end 
 of the world. Upon the whole, if this
 
 54 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 custom, which is certainly a disgrace to 
 our country, is to continue in force, I 
 think it may at least be practised in 
 a better manner. Suppose there were 
 written in large gold letters over the 
 door of every man of rank : The fees 
 
 fOR DINING HERE ARE THREE HALF 
 CROWNS [or ten shillings] TO BE PAID 
 TO THE PORTER ON ENTERING THE HOUSE : 
 PEERS OR PEERESSES TO PAY WHAT MORE 
 
 THEY THINK PROPER. By this regulation 
 two inconveniences would be avoided : 
 first, the difficulty of distinguishing, 
 amongst a great number, the quality of 
 the servants. I, who am near-sighted, 
 have sometimes given the footman what 
 I designed for the butler, and the butler 
 has had only the footman's fee : for which 
 the butler treated me with no small con-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. OO 
 
 tempt, until an opportunity offered of 
 correcting my error. But, secondly, this 
 method would prevent the shame which 
 every master of a family cannot help 
 feeling whilst he sees his guests giving 
 about their shillings and half-crowns to 
 his servants. He may then conduct 
 them boldly to his door, and take his 
 leave with a good grace. My Lord 
 Taaffe of Ireland, a general officer in 
 the Austrian service, came into England 
 a few years ago on account of his private 
 affairs. When his friends, who had dined 
 with him, were going away, he always 
 attended them to the door ; and if they 
 offered any money to the servant who 
 opened it (for he never suffered but one 
 servant to appear), he always prevented 
 them, saying, in liis manner of speaking
 
 56 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 Englishy " IF YOU do give, give it to 
 
 ME, FOR IT WAS I THAT DID BUY THE 
 DINNER.'* 
 
 A PERFECT FRIENDSHIP, as it is de- 
 scribed by the ancients, can only be 
 contracted between men of the greatest 
 virtue, generosity, truth, and honour. 
 Such a friendship requires that all things 
 should be in common ; and that one friend 
 should not only venture, but be ready to 
 lay down his life for the other. Accord- 
 ing to this definition of friendship, Cicero 
 observes that all the histories, from the 
 earliest ages down to his time, had not 
 recorded more than two or three pair of 
 friends ; and I doubt whether at this 
 day we could add two or three pair more 
 to the number. In our country, which
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 57 
 
 is governed by money, and where every 
 man is in pursuit of his own interest, it 
 would be in vain to look for a real friend- 
 ship. Our companions, and our common 
 acquaintance, those especially with whom 
 we live in any degree of familiarity, we 
 call our friends ; and we are always ready 
 to give them such marks of our friend- 
 ship as will not put us to any great in- 
 conveniency, or subject us to any great 
 expense. If an Englishman, like the 
 Greek philosopher, were to bequeath his 
 wife and children to be maintained by 
 one of his rich friends, he would be 
 deemed non compos. If a man would 
 long preserve his friendships, I mean 
 those imperfect friendships which are 
 generally contracted in this country, he 
 should be particularly careful to have no
 
 58 DR. KlNCrS ANECDOTES 
 
 money-concerns with his friends, at least 
 to owe them no great obligations on tliat 
 account. Most of the breaches of friend- 
 ship which I have remarked, as likewise 
 the family feuds which are now subsist- 
 ing in England^ are to be ascribed to this 
 cause. The latter indeed are not always 
 to be avoided, but the first always may. 
 I was talking on this subject with a 
 learned foreigner, who seemed to doubt 
 the truth of my general observation, and 
 thought my countrymen did not deserve 
 the character which 1 had imputed to 
 them. He could not conceive why there 
 was not the greatest warmth and activity 
 in our friendships, when we were so ready 
 to relieve the helpless and indigent, and 
 had given such proofs of our humanity 
 and charity as were not equalled by any
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 59 
 
 nation in Europe, And then he reckoned 
 all the hospitals which were supported 
 by annual and voluntary contributions. 
 I acknowledged this to be a kind of a 
 contradiction in our manners, but I did 
 not tell him that I imputed no small 
 proportion of these extraordinary cha- 
 rities to the vanity of the donors. 
 
 Suetonius, or whoever was the author 
 of the Life of Horace, tells us that Me- 
 ccenas, when he was dying, recommended 
 Horace to the care of Augustus Ccesar in 
 these words, Horatii Flacci, ut meiy me- 
 mor esto ; which in my judgment is the 
 noblest and most beautiful expression of 
 friendship that is recorded by any ancient 
 or modern historian or biographer. I 
 am so much affected by it, that in this 
 short sentence I imagine I can discern 
 the excellent qualities of the patron, and
 
 60 DR. KINP'S ANECDOTES 
 
 the great merit of the poet, as well as 
 the force of their friendship. 
 
 Doctor Swift was always persuaded 
 that the Archbishop of York had made 
 impressions on Queen Anne to his dis- 
 advantage, and by that means had ob- 
 structed his preferment in England; and 
 he has hinted this in his Apology for the 
 Tale of the Tuh^ and in other parts of his 
 works ; and yet my Lord Bolinbroke, 
 who must have been well informed of 
 this particular, told me that he had been 
 assured by the Queen herself, that she 
 never had received any unfavourable 
 character of Dr. Swift, nor had the 
 Archbishop, or any other person, en- 
 deavoured to lessen him in her esteem. 
 My Lord Bolinbroke added, that this 
 tale was invented by the Earl of O.v-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 61 
 
 ford to deceive Swift, and make him 
 contented with his Deanery in Ireland; 
 which, although his native country, he 
 always looked on as a place of banish- 
 ment. If Lord BoLiNBROKE had hated 
 the Earl of Oxford less, I should have 
 been readily inclined to believe him. 
 
 King Charles II. after taking two 
 or three turns one morning in St. James s 
 Park (as was his usual custom), attended 
 only by the Duke of Leeds and my Lord 
 Cromarty, walked up Constitution Hill, 
 and from thence into Hyde Park. But 
 just as he was crossing the road, the Duke 
 of YorF?, coach was nearly arrived there. 
 The Duke had been hunting that morn- 
 ing on Hounslow Heath, and was return- 
 ing in his coach, escorted by a party of 
 the guards, who, as soon as they saw the
 
 62 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 King, suddenly halted, and consequently 
 stopt the coach. The Duke being ac- 
 quainted with the occasion of the halt, 
 immediately got out of his coach, and, 
 after saluting the King, said he was 
 greatly surprised to iind his Majesty in 
 that place with such a small attendance, 
 and that he thought his Majesty exposed 
 himself to some danger. " No kind of 
 danger, James ; for I am sure no man 
 in England will take away my life to 
 make you King." This was the King's 
 answer. The old Lord Cromarty often 
 mentioned this anecdote to his friends. 
 
 In the civil war, my grandfather, 
 Sir William Smyth, was governor of 
 * Hillesdon House, near Buckingham, 
 
 * The siege of Hillesdon House is nowhere men- 
 tioned by my Lord Clarendon. The noble his- 
 torian and Sir W, Smytli were not good friends.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 63 
 
 where the king had a small garrison. 
 This place was besieged and taken by 
 Cromwell. But the officers capitulated 
 to march out with their arms, baggage, 
 &c. As soon as they were without the 
 gate, one of CromwelPs soldiers snatched 
 off Sir William Smyth's hat. He imme- 
 diately complained to Cromwell of the 
 fellow's insolence, and breach of the 
 capitulation. " Sir," says Cromwell, "if 
 you can point out the man, or I can dis- 
 cover him, I promise you he shall not 
 go unpunished. In the mean time (taking 
 off a new beaver, which he had on his 
 head) be pleased to accept of this hat 
 instead of your own." 
 
 I mention this incident for no other 
 reason but as it may serve in some mea- 
 sure to iUustrate Cromwell's character.
 
 64 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 Nothing is more mistaken than the 
 act of revenge when it concludes in 
 murder. To murder your enemy is to 
 make yourself miserable, and to make 
 him happy. By his death, perhaps, you 
 may hurt some of his friends or relations; 
 but this was not your intention. 
 
 To revenge the community is another 
 case, and the assassination of a tyrant is 
 public justice. And yet if I had been 
 Brutus, I could not have prevailed on 
 myself to have been one of Caesar's mur- 
 derers. 
 
 Cardinal Richelieu, who said that 
 unfortunate and imprudent are two words 
 which signify the same thing, seems to 
 have founded this maxim on the singular 
 happiness of his own administration. He
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 65 
 
 was certainly a very great politician; but 
 he had all the power as well as the whole 
 revenue of France at his disposal. He 
 had a regiment of guards for his own 
 person ; and the favours which he was 
 constantly conferring on his officers and 
 domestics attached them to him, and 
 secured their fidelity. It must further 
 be considered, that he made no scruple 
 of removing any man out of the way 
 who would not implicitly submit to his 
 will, or who seemed in any respect to 
 disapprove his measures. Vouldz vous 
 etre a moi? was the question he asked 
 Mareschal Bassompierre, wliich because 
 the Mareschal did not readily and di- 
 rectly answer, he was sent the next 
 morning to the Bastile, where he was a 
 prisoner until the Cardinal's death, about 
 
 F
 
 66 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 eighteen years. However, with all this 
 power and caution the Cardinal was two 
 or three times in great danger of his life, 
 and owed his escape to his good fortune 
 and presence of mind, and not to his 
 foresight, or to any intelligence he had 
 received of his enemy's designs. Let us 
 consult history, or make our own observa- 
 tions for the space of a few years, and 
 we shall be convinced that there is a fa- 
 tality which attends the lives of some 
 men (perhaps of us all), insomuch that 
 with the greatest prudence and circum- 
 spection, and with the noblest endow- 
 ments of the mind, they are not able to 
 avert their misfortunes; and if they 
 happen to be engaged in the service of 
 the commonwealth, the performance of 
 their duty shall subject them to an accusa-
 
 OP HIS OWN TIMES. 67 
 
 tion, and their virtues and love of their 
 country be construed into high crimes 
 and misdemeanors. On the other hand, 
 we may behold the dullest fellows, men 
 without any talents or any one good qua- 
 lity, succeed in all their undertakings, 
 and arrive so suddenly to wealth and 
 honours, that they may be justly styled, 
 as they generally are, the favourites of 
 Fortune. If they enjoy any high office 
 or public employment, even their negli- 
 gence, their blunders, their corruption, 
 shall turn to their advantage. I never re- 
 member any administration in this coun- 
 try that would not furnish us with many 
 examples both of one and the other. 
 
 Some ladies of my acquaintance, who 
 have a fine understanding and a turn to 
 
 F 2
 
 68 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 poetry, of which they are good judges, 
 have often complained that they could 
 not discover any great beauties in the 
 Odes of Horace, which are so much 
 admired J although they have read the 
 most celebrated translations (for they are 
 unacquainted with the original) in En- 
 glish, French, and Italian. But the truth 
 is, the Odes of Horace never were nor 
 ever can be translated, so as to display 
 the beauties of the original, which wholly 
 consist in the language and expression. 
 In the thought or sentiment there is 
 nothing extraordinary or more excellent 
 than what may be found in the poems of 
 his cotemporaries ; but the language is 
 inimitable, and I doubt whether the most 
 learned critic of the Augustan age, allow- 
 ing him the best taste as well as judg-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. ^9 
 
 merit, could have mended a single ex- 
 pression in any of the Odes, or even have 
 changed one word for a better. This is 
 what Petronius calls the curiosa feli- 
 citas of Horace; which two words are 
 as happily joined together as simplex 
 munditiis : and these four words are, per- 
 haps, sufficient to characterise the poet, 
 and express the beauty of his style in his 
 own manner. I could never read the 
 first stanza in the Carmen Seculare with- 
 out falling into a fit of devotion : and yet 
 when I read it in the best translation, it 
 does not affect me. Thus likewise those 
 beautiful odes Donee gratus eram, &c. 
 and Quern tu, Melpomene, &c. (of which 
 ScALiGER said he would rather be the 
 author than King of Arragon) rendered 
 into any modern language, do not seem
 
 70 DR. KINGS ANECPOI^PS 
 
 to deserve an hundredth part of the praise 
 bestowed on the originals. 
 
 The singular esteem which some 
 learned critics have always expressed for 
 the works of Horace became at last so 
 fashionable, that scarce a man who af- 
 fected the character of a polite scholar 
 ever travelled ten miles from home with- 
 out an Horace in his pocket. The late 
 E. of S. was such an admirer of Horace 
 that his whole conversation consisted of 
 quotations out of that poet : in which he 
 often discovered his want of skill in the 
 Latin tongue, and always his want of 
 taste. But the man whom I looked on 
 (if I may be allowed the expression) as 
 HoRACE-mad, was one Dr. Douglas, a 
 physician of some note in London : I 
 made an acquaintance with this gentle-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 71 
 
 man on purpose that I might have a sight 
 of his curious library (if it might be called 
 a library) which was a large room full of 
 all the editions of Horace which had 
 ever been published, as well as the several 
 translations of that author into the mo- 
 dern languages. If there were any other 
 books in this room, as there were a small 
 number, they were only there for the 
 sake of Horace, and were on no other 
 account valuable to the possessor but 
 because they contained some parts of 
 Horace which had been published with 
 select pieces or ea:cerpta out of other 
 Latin authors for the use of schools ; or 
 because the translations of some of the 
 odes and satires were printed in miscel- 
 lanies, and were not to be found any 
 where else. However, I must acknow-
 
 72 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 ledge that the Doctor understood his au- 
 thor, whom he had studied with great 
 care and application. Amongst other of 
 his criticisms he favoured me with the 
 perusal of a dissertation on the first ode, 
 and a defence of * Dr. Hare's famous 
 emendation of Te doctarum, &c. instead 
 of Me. 
 
 A STORY TELLER is the most agreeable 
 or the most disagreeable character we can 
 meet with. A story, which is designed 
 to entertain a polite company, should 
 
 * This emendation hath been given by the Dutch 
 critics to Brockhusius. But I could never find it in 
 any part of his works, and therefore the merit of it 
 should justly be left to Dr. Hare. 
 
 See a note at the bottom of page 150 of a pam- 
 phlet, published 1723, entitled Scriptures vindicated 
 from the misinterpretation of the Bishop of Bangor, 
 &c.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 73 
 
 always be short, and, with a mixture of 
 wit and humour, be told in good language. 
 King Charles the Second, who had 
 most excellent parts, had likewise a most 
 agreeable manner of telling his stories ; 
 and Sheffield, Duke of Buckingham, in- 
 forms us, that the same story which he 
 had heard from the King five or six times 
 he always heard with pleasure, as it was 
 always embellished with some new cir- 
 cumstances. This was a happy talent, 
 owing to a quick fancy and a lively ima- 
 gination ; for a frequent repetition of the 
 same tale to the same persons, which at 
 first was very entertaining, becomes at 
 length insipid and ridiculous, and is apt 
 to lessen the character of the man who 
 tells it, even in the esteem of his friends, 
 who ascribe that to the want of judgment
 
 74 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 or defect of understanding which should 
 only be imputed to the loss of memory. 
 I have been greatly abashed when I have 
 caught myself endeavouring to entertain 
 my friend with the same story which I 
 had related to him a few days before : 
 and I have sometimes resolved to cure 
 myself of this infirmity of my old age, 
 by restraining my conversation, and con- 
 fining it to the news and business of the 
 day, the manners of the times, &c. ; and 
 when I happen to be in the company of 
 scholars, making observations on ancient 
 and modern authors. But hitherto I 
 have not prevailed on myself to pursue 
 this prudent resolution ; but am content 
 to bear this reproach of my age in com- 
 mon with my equals. I remember only 
 one old man who was quite free from any
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES 75 
 
 imputation of this kind : he was a fellow 
 of the college in which I was educated, 
 and was an instructive and the most de- 
 lightful companion I have ever known ; 
 he had an inexhaustible fund of merry 
 tales, or rather he had such a fund of 
 wit, and such a quick and luxuriant ima- 
 gination, that he was always capable of 
 producing something new and very en- 
 tertaining ; and as we rarely heard him 
 tell the same stories twice, we concluded 
 they were the fruits of a sudden inven- 
 tion. Horace, I imagine, w^as a man 
 of this character; he was certainly a 
 pleasant and facetious companion, as we 
 may judge by the jollity of some of his 
 odes, and by the love which Augustus 
 and Mfficenas had conceived for him. 
 Among many other short stories he hath
 
 76 
 
 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 left US two, which are not more diverting 
 than they are instructive, the Ibam forte 
 via sacrdy and the account of Philippus 
 and the Crier, Epist. 7. B. 1. Lucian 
 was a merry Greek ; he is every where 
 full of wit J his drollery is exquisite, and 
 his satire is just : one of his short tales 
 has been wrought by Apuleius into a 
 large volume. But of all the ancient 
 authors of this character, I have a par- 
 tiality for Petronius. There is a certain 
 grace and pleasantry peculiar to himself 
 in whatever he relates : his history of the 
 EphesiaiTmatron is allowed by all the 
 critics to be a master-piece : it is concise 
 and elegant ; it is simple and sublime : 
 but what distinguishes the excellent judg- 
 ment of the author, there is not a cir- 
 cumstance which can be added to it or
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 77 
 
 taken from it without lessening its value ; 
 and Monsieur St. Evremond, though 
 I acknowledge him to be an admirable 
 writer, and one of the greatest geniuses 
 which this or the last age hath produced, 
 hath yet, in my opinion, done no honour 
 to Petronius by paraphrasing the Ephe- 
 siAN Matron, and lengthening the nar- 
 rative. To learn a good manner of tell- 
 ing a story or relating any fact, jocose or 
 serious, we should be very conversant 
 with Terence ; his comedies will furnish 
 many examples for our purpose : the first 
 scene in the Andria is a beautiful narra- 
 tive, and in my judgment hath not been 
 equalled by any comic writer, ancient or 
 modern. Cicero hath remarked some 
 of its excellencies : and there are othei-s 
 which cannot escape the observation of
 
 78 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 any man of taste. The incident, which 
 discovers the love of Pamphilus for Gly- 
 ceriuniy is so descriptive, that whilst we 
 are reading that part, we imagine our- 
 selves present at the funeral pile : the 
 whole scene is clear and methodical, and 
 though it consists of two or three pages 
 only, there are circumstances enough to 
 supply some modern memoir- writers with 
 matter for a whole volume. 
 
 A little before the revival of letters, 
 BoccACE and some other Italian wits 
 began to publish short stories ; and from 
 them our Chaucer borrowed most of 
 his Canterbury Tales. But whatever he 
 took in hand of foreign growth he much 
 improved, and adapted to the taste and 
 manners of his own countrymen. To- 
 wards the end of the last century and the
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 79 
 
 beginning of this, Fontaine and our 
 Prior published their tales, and it is 
 generally agreed that in this kind of 
 writing they have excelled all who went 
 before them. 
 
 But I have insensibly digressed from 
 my first purpose, which was only to men- 
 tion some particular characters, which, 
 as I had observed, were capable of en- 
 livening or confounding a conversation 
 by their manner of telling a story ; for a 
 man may be a facetious and witty author^ 
 who is a dull and heavy companion. Such, 
 I am well assured, was the celebrated 
 Fontaine, whom I have mentioned 
 above : and who that hath read Mr. Ad- 
 dison's Tatlers and Spectators, which 
 abound with wit and humour, and are 
 infinitely superior to all his other com-
 
 80 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 positions, would not expect to have found 
 him a most agreeable companion ? An 
 old acquaintance of mine hath treasured 
 up a very curious and interesting collec- 
 tion of anecdotes, which have always 
 given me great pleasure when I have 
 been able to come at them ; for though 
 he is ever ready to tell his story, and 
 likewise knows how to apply it, yet his 
 introduction is so long and tedious, and 
 his digressions so frequent, and so much 
 out of the way, that he often loses his 
 point of view, and is unable to recover 
 the track, unless he asks the person who 
 sits next him upon what occasion he be- 
 gan his tale ; and yet this gentleman does 
 not want either learning or prudence, 
 and has kept as good company as any 
 man in England. What is very remark-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 81 
 
 able, he is apt to condemn others for 
 the fault of which he is so notoriously 
 guilty; so little sensible are the wisest 
 men of their own failings ! 
 
 There are some persons who generally 
 take the lead in conversation, and are 
 well furnished for the purpose ; but they 
 relate nothing but what is wonderful, and 
 they are always the heroes of their own 
 romances : and like other heroes, they do 
 not easily bear a contradiction ; but are 
 apt to quarrel if you doubt their honour, 
 and seem incredulous. I knew a merry 
 droll, who was always an overmatch for 
 men of this character : whenever they 
 advanced something very romantic, he 
 always rose some degrees above them, 
 and asserted a fact which was more as- 
 tonishing and improbable than any thing
 
 82 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 which they had related. This is, per- 
 haps, the best and safest method of an- 
 swering a gasconade^ and reproving the 
 author. I will conclude with this observa- 
 tion : a story well told, and well applied, 
 is not only the most delightful part of a 
 private conversation, but is generally of 
 good use in a public assembly where any 
 important matter is to be debated ; for it 
 embellishes the most eloquent oration ; 
 it awakes and keeps up the attention of 
 the audience ; it puts the adverse party 
 into good humour, and has sometimes a 
 greater weight and influence than the 
 most powerful and persuasive arguments. 
 
 Deus nobis HiEC OTiA FECIT hath been 
 thought by some commentators a cri- 
 minal compliment, and a piece of flattery
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 83 
 
 unworthy of Virgil. But they have 
 not sufficiently considered how this ex- 
 pression is explained and qualified by 
 the verse which immediately follows, 
 7iamque erit tile mild semper Deus : for 
 here the poet seems to restrain the wor- 
 ship of Augustus to himself, and does 
 not require that he should be esteemed 
 a god by any other person. Besides, 
 this was not such a high flight in a Ro- 
 man poet as it would be in an English 
 or French writer : many of the Roman 
 deities had been men, and all of them 
 were subject to human infirmities and 
 the passions of men, such as love, anger, 
 hatred, and revenge : so that it would 
 not have been a crime to have pro- 
 nounced some of the most excellent citi- 
 zens of Rome superior to many of their 
 
 G 2
 
 84 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 gods; and Lucan has exalted Cato 
 above them all, if I rightly comprehend 
 the meaning of this verse, 
 
 Victrix causa Deis placuit, sed victa Catoni. 
 
 I am told that the * inscription placed 
 over the gate of the Duke of Argyle's 
 new house in Scotland is. 
 
 Dux Cumbria nobis hcec otia fecit. 
 
 This is a very improper motto or inscrip- 
 tion for a house, and is on another ac- 
 count very absurd ; for when we borrow 
 a verse from a Greek or Roman poet, and 
 adapt it to a modern purpose, by changing 
 a word or two, we should be careful to 
 fit the words we insert to the measure of 
 the verse. Dux Cumbri/e will not stand 
 
 * 1 have been since informed that this is the in- 
 scription of the foundation stone,
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 85 
 
 in an hexameter. Assuitur pannus. It 
 is prose and poetry ill pieced. 
 
 Flattery can never engage the at- 
 tention of a judicious reader, unless it 
 be short and very ingenious. The com- 
 pliments which Virgil and Horace 
 have bestowed on their patrons are read 
 with pleasure, and are the best examples 
 of this kind of writing. The force and 
 majesty of that beautiful climax, with 
 which Virgil concludes his Georgics, 
 cannot be sufficiently admired. 
 
 Ccesar duni magnus ad altum 
 Fulminat Euphratem hello : Victorque volentes 
 Per populos datjura ; viamque affectat Olympo. 
 
 How comprehensive is this short com- 
 pliment; and with what grace and dig- 
 nity the poet rises, till he exalts his 
 patron into a divinity! I may judge
 
 86 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 amiss, but I would rather have been the 
 author of these three verses than Pliny's 
 whole panegyric. 
 
 Horace begins his Epistle to Au- 
 gustus with great art and elegance of 
 expression. The public character which 
 he hath drawn of that prince in four or 
 five short sentences, a modern dedicator 
 would easily spin out into forty or fifty 
 pages *. 
 
 I have often wondered how the custom 
 of writing long dedications first prevailed; 
 it must certainly be attributed to the ig- 
 
 * Cum tot sustineas, et tanta negotia solus, 
 Res Italas hello tuteris, moribus ornes, 
 Legibus emendes : in publica commoda pecccni, 
 Si longo sermone morer tua tempora, CjEsak. 
 
 N. B. The praises given to the Emperor in the 
 end of this Epistle are as refined as those which 1 
 have cited.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. ^7 
 
 norance rather than to the vanity of 
 modern patrons. To ascribe to a great 
 man those virtues which he wants is in 
 my opinion an injurious treatment: it is 
 irony ; it is satire ; and hath sometimes 
 been construed as such, and pronounced 
 to be a libel by our courts of judicature. 
 There is, moreover, this ill consequence 
 resulting from it, that the patron's good 
 qualities, if he happens to have any good 
 qualities, are by this means obscured and 
 discredited ; for an heap of fulsome and 
 false praise will always render that sus- 
 pected which is true. When I take up 
 a book which is dedicated to the King or 
 a prince of the blood, or a prime minister, 
 or indeed any man of great quality or 
 great wealth, I always pass over the de- 
 dication, where 1 am sure oi' meeting
 
 88 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 with nothing but the grossest flattery. 
 If I could say of our * King what may 
 be said with great truth of the King of 
 
 Prussia, 
 
 Quern tu, Dea, tempore in omni 
 Omnibus omatum voluisti exceUere rebus, 
 
 would not this short eulogy be preferable 
 to all the public addresses, dedications, 
 poetical rhapsodies, and birth-day odes, 
 which have been composed in honour of 
 his Majesty since his accession to the 
 throne ? 
 
 Although Virgil was a court poet, 
 and a favourite of Augustus, and was 
 not only rewarded, but enriched by that 
 Emperor's bounty, yet his principles were 
 
 * King George the Second,
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 89 
 
 republican. He retained a secret vene- 
 ration for the patriot senators, and ab- 
 horred that venality and corruption by 
 which the first C^sar overturned the 
 liberties of his country, and fixed his 
 usurpation. There are two passages, 
 one in the 6th, and the other in the 8th 
 book of the ^neid, which sufficiently 
 prove my assertion. And I have some- 
 times wondered why Tucca and Varius 
 did not expunge them out of a compli- 
 ment to the prince; but it is probable 
 that their principles of government (for 
 they were both men of a distinguished 
 character) were the same as the poet's, 
 whose work they were commissioned to 
 revise. 
 
 Vendidit hie auro patriam, domimmque potcntem 
 Imposuit,
 
 90 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 The commentators are generally of opi- 
 nion that Virgil in this place alludes 
 to Curio, who sold Rome to Julius 
 C-ESAR, and was the principal cause of 
 the ruin of the Commonwealth. But 
 whether he alludes to Curio or not, he 
 certainly avows his own principles by 
 placing in the most horrible region of 
 his poetical hell the man who sells his 
 country, and erects it into a tyranny. 
 The other line in the 8th book, 
 
 Secretosgue pios : his dantemjura Catonem, 
 
 is a noble encomium on Cato, than 
 which nothing can be carried higher; 
 for the poet does not only assign to Cato 
 the first seat in the happy abodes, but he 
 places him at the head of all the otlier 
 blessed spirits as their guide and director.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 91 
 
 The critics and commentators seem to 
 agree th^-t Virgil does not mean Cato 
 Uticensis, but Cato the Censor; and 
 they all give the same reasons for their 
 conjecture. First, they allege, that to 
 have bestowed such particular praise on 
 Cato Uticensis, who was the most ob- 
 stinate and inveterate enemy of Julius 
 C^SAR, would have been a signal affront 
 to Augustus ; and, secondly, as Cato 
 was guilty of suicide, he could not be 
 admitted into the Elysian fields : but 
 these reasons, I think, are not convincing; 
 for was not the affront to Augustus as 
 great by placing Curio, the most useful 
 of CiESAR's friends, in hell, as honouring 
 Cato with a seat in Elysium ? and as to 
 his suicide, which the Romans esteemed 
 the noblest of all his actions, that could 
 be no bar lo his future happiness : the
 
 92 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 commentators forget that tEneas met 
 Dido in the Elysian fields. But whether 
 the poet designed this great dignity and 
 pre-eminence in Elysium for Cato the 
 Censor, or Cato Uticensis, or whether 
 he purposely left it doubtful, it is cer- 
 tain that he designed it (choose which of 
 the Catos you please) for a republican 
 and patriot spirit, for one who had been 
 a constant and steady friend to virtue 
 and his country. 
 
 Monsieur Tournefort, and other 
 judicious and candid travellers, who lived 
 some time among the Turks, and were 
 diligent to inquire into the religion, cus- 
 toms, and manners of those people, speak 
 of them very favourably. They acknow- 
 ledge that the Turks perform all the 
 duties of their religion with a scrupulous
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 93 
 
 exactness, and particularly are so cha- 
 ritable, that they are always ready to 
 relieve any person who will make his 
 necessities known. Monsieur Tourne- 
 FORT says, that he never saw a beggar 
 in Turkey. In truth, if we compare his 
 account of the Turks with the character 
 which he and some later travellers give 
 us of the Greeks, we have no reason to 
 be surprised that so few of the former 
 are proselyted to the faith of Christ ; 
 and yet these men are better Christians 
 than are perhaps to be found in most 
 parts of Christendom. As I have ob- 
 served before, they are not only eminent 
 for their charities, but upon all occasions 
 they are easy and ready to forgive one 
 another. They have no duels in that 
 country, nor is any man assassinated in
 
 94 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 Turkey from a false principle of honour 
 or revenge. They retain a grateful sense 
 of any favours they have received. A 
 Turk of some distinction, who had been 
 a slave at Leghorn^ and during his cap- 
 tivity in that city had been often relieved 
 by an English merchant, and by whose 
 means he was at last enabled to recover 
 his liberty, met Mr. Randolph (whose 
 travels we have) some years after at Ne- 
 gTopo?it, and knowing him to be an En- 
 glishman, treated him with the greatest 
 kindness and generosity ; and having 
 procured him a passage on board a Turk- 
 ish ship, he recommended him to the 
 captain in these words: ^^ When you see this 
 man, you see me; xvhat you do to hi?n, you 
 do to 7ne ; and I will answer it, he it good 
 or ill." What a sini})licity and goodness
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 95 
 
 of heart appears in this recommendation ! 
 For the rest, the Turks are very tem- 
 perate both in eating and drinking, and 
 the luxury of a table is unknown even 
 in the palace of their Emperor. They 
 persecute no one on the account of his 
 religion ; and the inquisitions of Spain 
 and Portugal they would abhor, as the 
 temples of Baal^ or the altars of Busiris. 
 I may add, that on some occasions they 
 offer up prayers to Jesus Christ, as to 
 a great prophet. They, indeed, deny his 
 divinity, which is in them much more 
 excusable than the blasphemy of those 
 monkish orders^ who make their founders 
 equal to our Saviour, and the miracles 
 pretended to be wrought by them su- 
 perior to the miracles of the gospel.
 
 96 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 The Answers which were made by 
 Mr. Legge and Mr. Pitt to the ad- 
 dresses of the several corporations, who 
 presented those gentlemen with gold 
 boxes, are in a very different style and 
 manner. Mr. Legge always answers 
 with dignity and freedom ; he professes, 
 he promises to serve his country; he 
 accepts of a place for that purpose, and 
 you cannot help believing him to be in 
 earnest. Mr. Pitt answers with caution 
 and reserve; his eyes are fixed on the 
 King; he goes into employment on 
 purpose to serve him, and thinks it his 
 greatest happiness to execute his Ma- 
 jesty's gracious intentions. If Mr. Pitt 
 flatters the King, he is a bad man ; if he 
 does not, he is a bad patriot.
 
 OF HIS OWS TIMES. 97 
 
 I BEGAN THE ToAST ill anger, but I 
 finished it in good humour. When I had 
 concluded the second book, I laid aside 
 the work, and I did not take it up again 
 till some years after, at the pressing in- 
 stances of Dr. Swift. In the last letter 
 which I received from him, he writes 
 thus : " In malice I hope your law-suit will 
 force you to, come over [to Dublin] the next 
 term, which I think is a long one, and will 
 allow you time to finish it; in the mean 
 time I wish I could hear of the progress 
 and finishing of another affair [the Toast] 
 relating to the same law-suit, hut tryed in 
 the courts above, upon a hill with two heads, 
 where the defendants will as irfalUbly and 
 more effectually be cast," &c. And speak- 
 ing of this work to a lady, his near rela- 
 tion, who is now living, after he had
 
 98 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 perused the greatest part of it in the 
 manuscript, he told her, if he had read 
 the Toast when he was only twenty years 
 of age, he never would have wrote a satire. 
 It is no wonder that such a singular 
 approbation should raise the vanity of 
 a young writer, or that I imagined I 
 wanted no other vindication of this per- 
 formance than Dr. Swift's opinion. 
 He was chiefly pleased with the notes, 
 and expressed his surprise that I had 
 attained such a facility in writing the 
 burlesque Latin. The motives which 
 induced me to form the notes in that 
 manner, was the judgment I made of 
 those on Mr. Pope's Dunciad. That 
 poem, it must be allowed, is an excellent 
 satire ; but there is little wit or humour 
 in the notes, although there is a great
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 99 
 
 affectation of both. After Dr. Swift's 
 testimonial, I ought, perhaps, to esteem 
 the Toast above all my other works ; 
 however, I must confess there are some 
 parts of it which my riper judgment con- 
 demns, and which I wish were expunged: 
 particularly the description of Mira's 
 person in the third book is fulsome, and 
 unsuitable to the polite manners of the 
 present age. But if this work was more 
 exceptionable than my enemies pretend 
 it is, I may urge for my excuse, that 
 although it has been printed more than 
 thirty years, yet it has never been pub- 
 lished : I have, indeed, presented a few 
 copies to some friends, on giving me 
 their honour that they would not suffer 
 the books to go out of their hands with- 
 out my consent. One of these persons, 
 
 H 2
 
 100 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 however, forfeited his honour in the 
 basest manner, by putting his copy into 
 the hands of Blacow, and the rest of 
 the Oxford informers ; but as they had 
 no key to the work, and did not under- 
 stand or know how to apply the charac- 
 ters, they were content to call it an exe- 
 crable book, and throw dirt at the author : 
 and this, in their judgment, is the most 
 effectual way of answering any perform- 
 ance of wit and humour. 
 
 Avarice, says the author of Religio 
 Medici, seems to me not so much a vice^ 
 as a deplorable piece of madness; and if 
 he had added incurable^ his definition 
 would have been perfect; for an ava- 
 ricious man is never to be cured unless 
 by the same medicine which perchance
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 101 
 
 may cure a mad dog. The arguments 
 of reason, philosophy, or religion, will 
 little affect him ; he is born and framed 
 to a sordid love of money, which first 
 appears when he is very young, grows 
 up with him, and increases in middle 
 age, and when he is old, and all the rest 
 of his passions have subsided, wholly en- 
 grosses him. The greatest endowments 
 of the mind, the greatest abilities in a 
 profession, and even the quiet possession 
 of an immense treasure, will never prevail 
 against avarice. My Lord Hard wick, 
 the late Lord Chancellor, who is said to 
 be worth 800,000/. sets the same value 
 on half a crown now as he did when he 
 was only worth one hundred. That great 
 captain, the Duke of Marlborough, 
 when he was in the last stage of life, and
 
 102 DR. KING'S ANECDOTCS 
 
 very infirm, would walk from the public 
 rooms in Bath to his lodgings in a cold 
 dark night to save sixpence in chair hire. 
 If the Duke, who left at his death more 
 than a million and a half sterling, could 
 have foreseen that all his wealth and 
 honours were to be inherited by a grand- 
 son of my Lord Trevor^s, who had been 
 one of his enemies, would he have been 
 so careful to save sixpence for the sake of 
 his heir ? Not for the sake of his heir ; but 
 he would always have saved a sixpence. 
 Sir James Lowther, after changing a 
 piece of silver in George's Coffee-house, 
 and paying twopence for his dish of 
 coffee, was helped into his chariot (for he 
 was then very lame and infirm), and went 
 home ; some little time after he returned 
 to the same coffee-house on purpose to
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 103 
 
 acquaint the woman who kept it that 
 she had given him a bad halfpenny, and 
 demanded another in exchange for it. 
 Sir James had about 40,000/. per annum, 
 and was at a loss whom to appoint his 
 heir. I knew one Sir Thomas Colby, 
 who lived at Kensington, and was, I 
 think, a commissioner in the victualling- 
 office ; he killed himself by rising in the 
 middle of the night when he was in a 
 very profuse sweat, the effect of a medi- 
 cine which he had taken for that purpose, 
 and walking down stairs to look for the 
 key of his cellar, which he had inad- 
 vertently left on a table in his parlour : 
 he was apprehensive that his servants 
 might seize the key and rob him of a 
 bottle of port wine. This man died in- 
 testate, and left more than 200,000/. in
 
 104 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 the funds, which was shared among five 
 or six day-labourers, who were his nearest 
 relations. Sir William Smyth of Bed- 
 fordshire, who was my kinsman, when he 
 was near seventy, was wholly deprived of 
 his sight : he was persuaded to be couched 
 by Taylor, the oculist, who by agree- 
 ment was to have sixty guineas if he re- 
 stored his patients to any degree of sight: 
 Taylor succeeded in his operation, and 
 Sir William was able to read and write 
 without the use of spectacles during the 
 rest of his life ; but as soon as the opera- 
 tion was performed, and Sir William 
 perceived the good effects of it, instead 
 of being overjoyed, as any other person 
 would have been, he began to lament 
 the loss (as he called it) of his sixty 
 guineas. His contrivance therefore now
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 105 
 
 was how to cheat the oculist: he pre- 
 tended that he had only a glimmering, 
 and could see nothing perfectly; for that 
 reason the bandage on his eye was con- 
 tinued a month longer than the usual 
 time^ by this means he obliged Taylor 
 to compound the bargain, and accept of 
 twenty guineas ; for a covetous man thinks 
 no method dishonest which he maylegally 
 practise to save his money. Sir William 
 was an old bachelor, and at the time 
 Taylor couched him had a fair estate 
 in land, a large sum of money in the 
 stocks, and not less than 5000 or 6000 in 
 his house. But to conclude this article ; 
 all the dramatic writers, both ancient and 
 modern, as well as the keenest and most 
 elegant satirists, have exhausted their 
 whole stock of wit to expose avarice ;
 
 106 DR, KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 this is the chief subject of Horace's sa- 
 tires and epistles ; and yet the character 
 of a covetous man hath never yet been 
 fully drawn or sufficiently explained. 
 The EucLio of Plautus, the L'Avare of 
 MoLiERE, and the Miser of Shadwell, 
 have been all exceeded by some persons 
 who have existed within my own know- 
 ledge. If you could bestow on a man 
 of this disposition the wealth of both 
 the Indies^ he would not have enough j 
 because by enough (if such a word is to 
 be found in the vocabulary of Avarice) 
 he always means something more than 
 he is possessed of. Crassus, who had 
 a yearly revenue sufficient to maintain a 
 great army, perished, together with his 
 son, in endeavouring to add to his store. 
 In the fable of Midas, the poet had ex-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 107 
 
 hibited a complete character, if Midas, 
 instead of renouncing the gift which the 
 god had bestowed on him, had chosen to 
 die in the act of creating gold. 
 
 I HAVE LATELY READ a Small VolumC 
 
 in octavo, which hath been universally 
 well received ; so that in the space of a 
 year there were published no less than 
 six editions of this book ; and yet there 
 is nothing to be found in it that is new ; 
 but the author hath judiciously collected 
 the thoughts and sentiments of our best 
 poHtical writers, which he hath displayed 
 with so much art, and hath methodised 
 and arranged in such an agreeable order, 
 and in so neat a style, that he seems to 
 have made every thing his own. The 
 scope of this work is to prove, that all
 
 108 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 the misfortunes which happened to us 
 the beginning of the present war are to 
 be ascribed to our effeminacy and luxury, 
 which are the necessary consequences of 
 that system of corruption by which we 
 now are governed. I should have con- 
 ceived a very high opinion of this writer, 
 and have esteemed the man as much as 
 his work, if he had not been guilty of 
 such base adulation j especially if he had 
 not flattered one of the great patrons of 
 that corruption which he hath so justly 
 complained of and exposed. If I were 
 to write a satire against gaming, and in 
 the middle of my work insert a panegyric 
 on the clubs at Arthur's, who would 
 not question the good intentions of the 
 author? and who would not condemn 
 the absurdity of such a motley piece? 
 Humano capitis &c.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 109 
 
 A PRIME MINISTER, who lias a little 
 mind and a weak judgment, makes a 
 hundred promises, which are neither in 
 his abilities or in his intentions to per- 
 form : he is despised by his own instru- 
 ments and levee-hunters, and hated by all 
 the rest of the nation ; he is incapable of 
 forming or executing any great or glo- 
 rious design; he has only one thing in 
 view, which is to preserve his power by 
 a corrupt majority in the House of Com- 
 mons : for this reason he prefers his fol- 
 lowers out of mere necessity, who never 
 think themselves obliged to him for the 
 places and pensions which they enjoy. 
 The D. of N. hath spent half a million, 
 and made the fortunes of five hundred 
 men, and yet is not allowed to have one 
 real friend.
 
 110 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 E CCELO DESCENDIT, rNfi! DEAYTON, 
 
 is an article of my creed ; and certainly 
 to know one's self is the perfection of 
 human knowledge, and the man who hath 
 early attained it will pass through life 
 with ease and tranquillity. Cicero, in 
 an epistle to his brother, hath well ex- 
 plained this precept, prceceptum illud noli 
 putare ad arrogantiam minuendam solum 
 esse dictum, verum etiam, ut bona nostra 
 norimus. To know ourselves is to be as 
 truly sensible of our good as of our bad 
 qualities ; and whilst we endeavour to 
 free ourselves from the last, to know how 
 to apply the first in the conduct of life. 
 I have been acquainted with men of wit 
 and learning, and whose morals were 
 irreproachable, who were little acquainted 
 with themselves, who so egregiously mis- 
 took their own talents as to leave or
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. Ill 
 
 resign into the hands of others affairs 
 of importance which they could have 
 finished with honour and profit, in order 
 to go into a business of which they were 
 totally ignorant. If Mr. Addison had 
 entered into holy orders (and he had 
 made divinity his chief study), he might 
 have placed himself as high as he pleased 
 on the bench of bishops ; in that station 
 he would have done honour to the hie- 
 rarchy, and w^ould have been a principal 
 ornament of the Church of England: but 
 he ambitioned to be a minister of state, 
 and because he had some talents, which 
 no man in the administration possessed, 
 he thought himself capable of filling the 
 first employments in the government. 
 This also seemed to be the opinion of 
 his friends and patrons, and upon this
 
 112 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 presumption he was appointed Secretary 
 of State : but he soon found himself in- 
 capable of performing the duty of his 
 office ; for though he understood the 
 foreign languages, and could write his 
 own with purity, elegance, and correct- 
 ness, yet he could not speak a word in 
 the house of parliament ; and, which is 
 more surprising, he could not dictate 
 the common letters of business which 
 were necessary to be sent from his office ; 
 he was, therefore, to his great mortifica- 
 tion, obliged to resign it, and content 
 himself with a sinecure, the place of a 
 Teller in the Exchequer, during the rest 
 of his life. I knew Mr. Areskine, my 
 Lord Mark's brother; he was one of 
 the judges in Scotland, and was much 
 esteemed for his abilities and knowledge
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 113 
 
 in the laws of his country. His station, 
 in virtue of which, he was called Lord 
 Grange *, was honourable, was for life ; 
 and such a salary was annexed to it as 
 would enable a man to live in ease and 
 affluence in that part of the world. How- 
 ever he was by no means satisfied with 
 this office ; and therefore, to render him- 
 self more conspicuous, he determined to 
 get a seat in the House of Commons ; 
 though to effect this, he was previously 
 obliged to resign his judgeship. However, 
 he made no doubt of soon acquiring by 
 his oratory some great and lucrative em- 
 
 * The Duke of Argyle, as soon as he was informed 
 that my Lord Grange had taken his measures so 
 well as to be sure of being elected into parliament, 
 brought a bill into the House of Lords, which easily 
 l)assed both Houses, to discjualify any judge of Scot- 
 land to sit in the House of Commons.
 
 114 DR. KING S ANECDOTES 
 
 ployment in England: his first speech 
 was much applauded, for he understood 
 business, and argued justly; but the 
 House would not long endure his Scotch 
 accent; so that after speaking three or 
 four times he was ill heard and neglected. 
 In the next parliament he lost his elec- 
 tion ; and I met him in London a year 
 or two before he died, when he was so 
 reduced in his circumstances that he was 
 scarce able to furnish himself with the 
 necessaries of life. Upon recollection I 
 could instance some other persons of great 
 abilities, who have either suffered a signal 
 disgrace, or have ruined their fortunes, 
 for want of inspecting more nearly into 
 themselves ; and I do not know whether 
 I may not be justified if I insert the 
 name of Lokd George Sackville in
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 115 
 
 my catalogue : but not in consequence of 
 the sentence pronounced against him by 
 the court martial (for it was a very ex- 
 traordinary proceeding to judge a man 
 first and try him afterwards,) but from 
 the unprejudiced relation of some officers 
 of honour and integrity, who had been 
 with my Lord in action, and had remarked 
 his conduct. But notwithstanding the 
 characters I have here mentioned, I can- 
 not easily believe it would be very diffi- 
 cult for a man to be so familiar with him- 
 self as to know what he can or can not 
 do, quidferre recusent Quid valeafit hu- 
 meri. It is indeed the peculiar happiness 
 of this country, that all who have any 
 share in the administration of public 
 affiiirs are equally fit for all employ- 
 ment. His Grace of N. was first Cham- 
 
 I '2
 
 116 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 berlain, then Secretary of State, and 
 is now First Commissioner of the Trea- 
 sury and Chancellor of Cambridge ; and 
 all these high employments he hath exe- 
 cuted with equal capacity and judgment, 
 without being indebted to age or ex- 
 perience for the least improvement ; and 
 if he had been pleased to accept the 
 Archbishopric of Canterbury, when it 
 was lately vacant, he would have proved 
 himself as great an orator in the pulpit 
 as he is in the senate, and as able a divine 
 as he is a politician. As often as I liear 
 this nobleman named, he puts me in 
 mind of a certain Irish baronet, a man 
 of some interest in his country, who when 
 the Duke of Ormonde was appointed 
 Lord Lieutenant of Ireland in the be- 
 ginning of Queen Anne's reign, desired
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 117 
 
 his Grace to give him a bishopric, or a 
 regiment of horse, or to make him Lord 
 Chief Justice of the King's Bench. 
 
 A TRIFLING INCIDENT hath somctimcs 
 been the occasion of the greatest quar- 
 rels, and such as have ended fatally. 
 I remember two gentlemen, who were 
 constant companions, disputing one even- 
 ing at the Grecian Coffee-house concern- 
 ing the accent of a Greek word. This dis- 
 pute was carried to such a length that 
 tlie two friends thought proper to deter- 
 mine it with their swords ; for this pur- 
 pose they stept out into Devereux Court, 
 where one of them (whose name, if 
 I rightly remember, was Fitzgerald) 
 was run through the body, and died on 
 the spot. Some gentlemen and ladies
 
 118 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 of two noble families in Scotland, who 
 were near relations, and had always lived 
 together in the greatest harmony and 
 friendship, supt with me in St. Mary 
 Hall. A very innocent joke, which was 
 designed by the present Earl of M. who 
 was one of the company, to increase our 
 mirth and good humour, was highly re- 
 sented by one of the ladies, and after- 
 wards improved by her into such a quar- 
 rel, as concluded in an open rupture be- 
 tween the two families. 
 
 I. G. my old acquaintance, and one 
 Mr. E. of Bristol, both single men, and 
 in good health and good circumstances, 
 agreed to travel together for three or 
 four years, and visit all the countries of 
 Europe ; for that purpose they provided 
 themselves with passports, bills of ex-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 119 
 
 change, letters of credit and recom- 
 mendation, &c. About six or seven days 
 after they set out, they arrived at Brus- 
 sels, where they had for supper a wood- 
 cock and a partridge ; they disputed long 
 which of the birds should be cut up first, 
 and with so much heat and animosity, 
 that if they had not both been gentlemen 
 of a well-tempered courage, this silly dis- 
 pute might have terminated as unhappily 
 as the affair at the Grecian Coffee-house. 
 To such an height however the quarrel 
 arose, that they did not only renounce 
 their new design of travelling, but all 
 friendship and correspondence ; and the 
 next morning they parted, and returned 
 to England, one by the way of Calais, 
 and the other through Holland. About 
 half a year afterwards I happened to be
 
 120 DH. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 in I. G.*s company ; I asked him whether 
 what I had heard was true, that he and 
 E TON had agreed to make the tour of 
 Europe together, but had unfortunately 
 quarrelled the first week about cutting 
 up a woodcock and a partridge. " Very 
 truei** says he; " and did you ever know 
 such an absurd fellow as E ton, who in- 
 sisted on cutting up a woodcock before a 
 partridge * ?" If my old acquaintance 
 had not made me this answer, I should 
 not, I believe, have told this story. These 
 relations may serve to give a foreigner 
 some idea of those many odd and sin- 
 gular characters which are so justly im- 
 puted to the English nation. 
 
 * If we were carefully to trace the descent of 
 these whimsical heads, we should generally discover 
 a madness in the family.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 121 
 
 Ille crucem tulit, hic diadema, is 
 what must frequently happen in every 
 corrupt administration ; and was lately 
 verified by the sentence of the court 
 martial which tried Admiral Bing, and 
 the honours which at the same time were 
 conferred on the Governor of Minorca. 
 I speak this upon a supposition that 
 Bing was justly put to death ; of which 
 a doubt will always remain with us, and 
 which our posterity will scarce believe, 
 since, in the judgment of those very 
 gentlemen who condemned this unfor- 
 tunate admiral, he deserved nothing 
 worthy of death or of bonds. Admiral 
 Forbes, one of the Lords of the Ad- 
 miralty, who refused to concur with the 
 rest of his brethren, hath given such rea- 
 sons for his dissent, as sufficiently de- 
 monstrate the absurdity of their sentence,
 
 122 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 to say no worse of it. But whether Mr. 
 BiNG suffered justly or not, it is apparent 
 to the whole nation that those ministers 
 who took no care to supply the garrison 
 of Port Mahon, after they had received 
 certain advice of the intended invasion, 
 were the greater criminals. May it not 
 be fairly inferred that Bing was sacri- 
 ficed to appease the clamour of the peo- 
 ple, and to screen his superiors ? 
 
 Whoever hath read the History of 
 the five James's, and attentively consi- 
 dered the great misfortunes which have 
 befallen the House of Stuart*, both 
 before and since the crown of England 
 
 * Si quelque chose justifie ceux^ qui croient une 
 fatalite, ^ laquelle rien ne se peut se soustraire, c'est 
 cette suite continuellc de malheurs qui persecuta la 
 Maison de Stuart pcndaut plus de trois cent annees. 
 
 VoLTAIKE, Louis XI V,
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 123 
 
 was settled on the princes of that name, 
 must acknowledge that an evil fate hath 
 constantly pursued them, and seems de- 
 termined never to leave their family till 
 every branch of it be extinguished. If 
 I were to ascribe their calamities to an- 
 other cause, or endeavour to account for 
 them by any natural means, I should 
 think they were chiefly owing to a cer- 
 tain obstinacy of temper, which appears 
 to have been hereditary, and inherent 
 in all the Stuarts, except Charles II. 
 I have read a series of letters which 
 passed between King Charles I., whilst 
 he was prisoner at Newcastle, and his 
 queen, who was then in France. The 
 whole purport of her letters was to press 
 him most earnestly to make his escape,
 
 124 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 which she had so well contrived, by the 
 assistance of Cardinal Mazarin, that it 
 could not fail of success. She informed 
 him of the designs of his enemies, and 
 assured him, if he suffered himself to be 
 conveyed to London, they would cer- 
 tainly put him to death. But all her 
 entreaties were fruitless : she could not 
 persuade him to believe her informations. 
 In all his answers he was positive that 
 his enemies would not dare to attempt 
 his life. This king was certainly a most 
 religious and virtuous man ; but he had 
 conceived too high a notion of his pre- 
 rogative, and he wanted all the arts of 
 government. The same thing may truly 
 be said of King James II. whose mis- 
 fortunes have generally been ascribed.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 125 
 
 both by his friends and enemies, not so 
 much to his bigotry*, as to the ill judg- 
 ment which he made of men and things, 
 and which was not to be convinced or 
 controlled by any remonstrances. I was 
 talking with the old Lord Granard, whom 
 I knew formerly in Ireland, concerning 
 the revolution. He told me, that the 
 first night he arrived at the camp on 
 Salisbury Plain, where King James was 
 then with his army, and where my Lord 
 Granard had the command of a regiment, 
 that Churchill (the late Duke of Marl- 
 borough) and some other colonels invited 
 him to supper, and opened to him their 
 design of deserting to the Prince of 
 Orange. My Lord Granard did not 
 
 * But his ill judgment was perhaps tlic etfect of 
 his bigotry. See the next note;.
 
 126 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 only refuse to enter into the confederacy, 
 but went immediately to the King, and 
 told him he was betrayed, acquainting 
 him with the discourse which had passed 
 at supper. At the same time he advised 
 the King to seize all the conspirators, 
 and give their commands to other officers, 
 of whose fidelity he could be well assured. 
 If this advice had been followed. King 
 William's attempt had probably been 
 defeated ; but the King did not seem to 
 give any credit to my Lord Granard*s 
 story, and neglected to make a present 
 inquiry into an affiiir of such great im- 
 portance. The next morning he was 
 convinced of his error, when it was too 
 late to apply a remedy. I could mention 
 other anecdotes, which I heard from some 
 Roman Catholic gentlemen in Ireland,
 
 OF HIS 0\^^^ TIMES. 127 
 
 relating to King James's* conduct, which 
 would make it evidently appear that he 
 lost that kingdom by the same obstinacy 
 and wrong judgment by which he was 
 deprived of the crown of England. And 
 
 * King James II. was a good Englishman, and a 
 lover of his country, and was perhaps less ambitious 
 and less desirous of absolute power than his successor. 
 If he had been indifferent in matters of religion, 
 or had professed the same faith with the Emperor of 
 China, he would have proved one of the best princes 
 who have governed the British islands. But his 
 great bigotry obscured all his good qualities ; and 
 his zeal to introduce popery was so violent, and 
 prompted him to such extravagant attempts, as 
 must necessarily, if they had succeeded, have ended 
 in the total ruin, not only of our religious, but our 
 civil liberties. This king's intemperate ze.al was 
 ridiculed even by the court of Rome. And how 
 must he have been mortified, if, upon his first ap- 
 pearance at Versailles, after his abdication, he had 
 
 heard Cardinal say to the person who stood 
 
 next him, " see the man who lost three kingdoms 
 for an old mass!"
 
 128 DR. KING S ANECDOTES 
 
 now I could derive the same character 
 down to his grandson, who made such a 
 figure in 1745, if, for the better informa- 
 tion of my countrymen, I were at liberty to 
 relate some recent transactions, quceque 
 ipse miserrima vidi et quorum pars magna 
 fid. 
 
 A Repartee, or a quick and witty 
 answer to an insolent taunt, or to any 
 ill-natured or ironical joke or question, 
 is always well received (whether in a 
 public assembly or a private company) 
 by the persons who hear it, and gives a 
 reputation to the man who makes it. 
 Cicero, in one of his letters to Atticus, 
 informs him of some reproaches, a kind 
 of coarse raillery, which passed between 
 himself and Clodius in the senate, and
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 129 
 
 seems to exult and value himself much 
 on his own repartees: though I do not 
 think that this was one of Cicero's ex- 
 cellencies. Atterbury, Bishop of Ro- 
 chester, when a certain bill was brought 
 into the House of Lords, said among 
 other things, " that he prophesied last 
 winter this bill would he attempted in the 
 present session, and he was sorry to find 
 that he had proved a true prophet ^ My 
 Lord CoNiNGSBY, who spoke after the 
 bishop, and always spoke in a passion, 
 desired the house to remark, " that one 
 of the Right Reverend had set himself forth 
 as a prophet ; but for his part he did not 
 k?iow xvhat prophet to liken to, imless to 
 that furious prophet Balaam, zvJlc zvas 
 reproved by his own ass." The bishop in 
 a reply, with great wit and calmness,, 
 exposed this rude attack, conchiding 
 
 K
 
 130 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 thus : " since the 7whle Lord hath dis- 
 covered in our manners such a similitude^ 
 I am well content to be compared to the 
 prophet Balaam: but, my Lords, I am at 
 a loss how to make out the other part of the 
 parallel : I am sure that I have been re- 
 proved by nobody but his Lordship** 
 
 When the late Earl of Cadogan was 
 sent on an embassy to Vienna, he was 
 one day invited by Prince Eugene to 
 be present at a review of the Austrian 
 Cuirassiers, which were a body of ten 
 thousand horse, and said to be the finest 
 troops in Europe: during the review. 
 Prince Eugene turned to an English 
 officer, who had accompanied my Lord 
 Cadogan, and asked him if he thought 
 ** that any ten thousand English horse 
 could beat those Atistrians." " / do not 
 knowj Sir,*' says the English officer.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 131 
 
 " ivhether they could or not t hut I know 
 that Jive thousand would try" This was 
 a spirited answer, and such as the ques- 
 tion deserved; for in this instance the 
 prince seemed to have dropt his polite- 
 ness. 
 
 I WAS AT TuNBRiDGE in 1758^ where 
 I met with the Chevalier Taylou, the 
 famous oculist. He seems to Understand 
 the anatomy of th6 eye perfectly well ; 
 he has a fine hand and good instruments, 
 and performs all his operations with great- 
 dexterity -, for the rest, Elliiin homo con- 
 fidens ! who undertakes any thing (even 
 impossible cases) and promises ^veiy 
 thing. No charlatan ever appeared witli 
 fitter and more excellent talents, or to a 
 greater advantage ; he has a good person, 
 
 K 2
 
 132 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 is a natural orator, and has a facility of 
 learning foreign languages. He has tra- 
 velled over all Europe, and always with 
 an equipage suitable to a man of the 
 first quality, and hath been introduced 
 to most of the sovereign princes, from 
 whom he has received many marks of 
 their liberality and esteem, titles, orders, 
 medals, rings, pictures, &c. He is an 
 honorary member of many foreign uni- 
 versities, and has published his works 
 in Latin, English, French, Spanisli, and 
 Italian. He pretends to know the se- 
 crets of all courts, and to be as skilful 
 a politician as he is an oculist. He re- 
 turned to Englandy as he told me, in 
 hopes of being immediately introduced 
 to his * Majesty, and recommended as 
 King George II.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 133 
 
 the only person able to cure the King's 
 eyes ; but he has not hitherto succeeded 
 in this attempt, nor in other respects 
 been so highly considered by his own 
 countrymen as by foreign nations. The 
 following character, which I had drawn 
 of him, he entreated me to publish, as 
 what he conceived would do him honour. 
 
 Elogium. 
 
 HiC EST, HIC VIR EST, 
 
 Queiu docti, indoctique omnes impense mirantur, 
 
 Johannes Taylor 5 
 
 Caecigenorum, caecorum & caecutientium 
 
 Quotquot sunt ubique, 
 
 Spes unica, solamen, salus. 
 
 Quorum causa 
 
 Cunctas Europa; peragravit regiones ; 
 
 Neque usquam gentium fuit hospes. 
 
 Nisi in patria sua, 
 
 Russicis, Suecicis, Lusitanicis, 
 
 Titulis, phaJeris, ton^uibus 
 
 Decorus intcdit :
 
 134 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 Totoque orbc nemini ciiiquam ignotus, 
 Nisi sibi. 
 
 Orator summus non factus, sed natu8, 
 
 Vocis, perinde atque manus, celeritatc insignig, 
 
 Scit Latin^, Gallice, Italice, Germanice fari, 
 
 Oinnes callens linguas 
 
 Mqa^ ac sermonem patrium. 
 
 Vultu conppto, corpore procero, fronte urbana glo- 
 
 riosus, 
 
 Ingenioque praeditus prope singular!, 
 
 Artem amandi^ et amoris remedium 
 
 Plenius et melius Nasone ipso 
 
 Edidicit, docuit, exercuit. 
 
 Mirificus Tabulator, magnificus promissor, 
 
 Rerum copii, artiumque varietate abundans, 
 
 Sese exhibet, effert, praedicat 
 
 In gymnasiis, in gynaeceis, in conviviis, in triviisj 
 
 Philosophando gloriam magnam adeptus, 
 
 Maximam saltando. 
 
 In peregrinis civitatibus 
 
 Equos, servosque innunieros, quos vix Satrapes 
 
 Potest habere^ 
 
 lUe alit. 
 
 Domi veroj
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 135 
 
 Quffi est moderatk) aaimi sui, 
 
 Uno vili mancipio 
 
 Contentus vivit. 
 
 In celebemmas cooptatus est Academias : 
 Neque tamen moribus, neque vultu, neque vestitu, 
 Videtur Academicus. 
 
 Regnorum omnium arcana scrutari potuit : 
 Neque tamen speculator sagax, 
 Neque regis cujusquam legatus, 
 Neque usquam fuit vir aulicus. 
 
 Praimia, dona, permulta, amplissima accepit j 
 
 Permulta corrasit, pecuniae appetentior : 
 
 Et nondum^ eheu! locupletatur. 
 
 Plures scripsit libros, quam quivis possit legere : 
 
 Qui facinoribus tamen suis egregiis 
 
 Haud sufficiunt enumerandis. 
 
 Sexcentis primariis viris lumina reddidit : 
 
 Plusquam sexcentis, sed plebeiis, 
 
 Sed miseris, ademit. 
 
 Turn vero civibus suis prsecipue colendus. 
 Turn carminibus, docte* Morelle, tuis celebrandus, 
 
 Qui laudcs hujus ophthalmici cecinit carmini- 
 bus Graecis et Anglicanis.
 
 136 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 Turn diplomatibus honorificis, & muneribus regiis 
 
 donandus ; 
 
 Si Csesarem nostrum, pium, fortem, semper Augus- 
 
 tum, 
 
 Faceret bene oculatum, 
 
 Et malos, sic^ui sunt, consiliarios 
 
 Tiresia caeciores*. 
 
 There is no place I have ever seer* 
 which I review with so much pleasure 
 and satisfaction as the place of my school 
 educationt,and the scenesof my boyhood. 
 
 * I have had an opportunity since this Elogium 
 was written of viewing our Chevalier more nearly, 
 and considering him witli greater attention. I have 
 therefore been able to improve the Elogium, and 
 add some new features to his portrait ; of which I 
 have printed a few copies to oblige my friends. 
 
 t My mother having died of the small-pox when 
 1 was about seven years old, I was sent by my grand- 
 father. Sir William Smyth, to Salisbury, and 
 placed under the care of Mr. Taylor, the master of 
 the free-school in that city. There were at that 
 time two very tioiirishing schools in Salisbury.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 137 
 
 I feel a thrilling secret joy in every street 
 I pass through. How many agreeable 
 trifles and little amusements do I recol- 
 lect at almost every step ! All my actions 
 were then very innocent, and my errors 
 and follies excusable : not so after I had 
 entered into the great world ! 
 
 Mr. Lesley, a very eminent nonjur- 
 ing clergyman, the author of the Re- 
 hearsals, and of many other political and 
 controversial tracts during the reigns of 
 King William and Queen Anne, left 
 two sons, with whom I was intimately 
 acquainted. They were both men of 
 good parts and learning; but in their 
 disposition and manners they were so 
 very different, that they did not seem to 
 be of the same family, nor even of the
 
 138 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 same nation. The elder brother was 
 overbearing and talkative; and, though 
 he was sometimes an agreeable compa- 
 nion, yet he oftener tired and disgusted 
 his company. He was so careless of his 
 private affairs, that he could never be 
 prevailed on to examine his agent's ac- 
 counts. I have sometimes jocularly 
 asked him if he knew the value of our 
 coin, or the real difference between a 
 piece of copper and a piece of silver of 
 the same weight; for often, when I 
 have been walking with him in the 
 streets, he has given a beggar, who im- 
 portuned him for an halfpenny, half a 
 crown (for he always gave the first piece 
 that came to his hand) ; but not from 
 any principle of charity, but merely from 
 his contempt of money, and to be rid of
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 139 
 
 the beggar's importunity ; so that a small 
 number of artful mendicants would often 
 watch his motions, and by this means 
 empty his pockets before he returned 
 home. 
 
 * Robin to beggars, with a curse, 
 Flings the last shilling in his purse : 
 And, when the coachman comes for pay. 
 The rogue must call another day. 
 
 Young Harry, when the poor are pressing, 
 Gives them a penny, and God's blessing ; 
 But, always careful of the main, 
 With twopence left walks home in rain. 
 
 Harry Lesley, the younger brother, 
 who had been a colonel in the Spanish 
 army, was grave, modest, and very well 
 bred. He seldom talked of any thing 
 
 * This is part of a manuscript poem, written by 
 Dr. Swift, in which, in his humorous manner, he 
 has drawn a character of the two brothers.
 
 140 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 which he did not perfectly understand ; 
 and he was always heard with pleasure. 
 With an estate, worth about 500/. per 
 annum, he made a good figure, kept a 
 very hospitable table, and was universally 
 esteemed by all his neighbours and ac- 
 quaintance ; for he was a gentleman of 
 great honour and probity, and great 
 goodness of heart. In his last sickness 
 he ordered his manuscripts to be sent to 
 me : amongst which are many essays 
 which are worthy of being offered to the 
 public. 
 
 Baxter's Phenomenon of Dream- 
 ing hath given me greater satisfaction 
 than any thing else which I have read 
 on the same subject : and yet there are 
 many objections which may be made to
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 14t 
 
 his hypothesis. And it seems to me a 
 certain truth, that both our reason and 
 philosophy must ever be puzzled how to 
 account for the operations of our souls 
 when we are sleeping; very often, in- 
 deed, when we are awake: for without 
 a bribe, and when we are not urged by 
 any governing passion, we find ourselves, 
 on many occasions, impelled, by an irre- 
 sistible fatality, to act contrary to the 
 dictates both of our reason and our con- 
 science. Novi meliora proboque Dete- 
 riora sequor may, I fear, be said witli 
 truth of the whole human species : at 
 least, upon a strict examination of our- 
 selves, our friends, and acquaintance, we 
 shall discover but few characters which 
 are exempt from this imputation. But 
 to return to the phaenomenon of dreams:
 
 142 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 we must either contradict all history, 
 both sacred and profane, or we must 
 agree that our souls, at some times, seem 
 to exercise, in our dreams, a very extra- 
 ordinary intuitive faculty; and either 
 by their own powers are able to discover 
 future events, or, according to Baxter's 
 system, by the information of other spi- 
 rits. I do not discredit the story of 
 Brutus and his evil genius ; but I be- 
 lieve the whole to have passed in a dream, 
 although Brutus might think himself 
 awake. Cicero's recal from banishment 
 was foretold in a dream, which he has 
 recited; but for which he endeavours 
 to account in an unphilosophical, and, 
 indeed, in a very absurd manner. And 
 because he was of a sect whose first prin- 
 ciples were to doubt of every thinsf, he
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 143 
 
 would not, therefore, acknowledge a 
 truth which he had experienced in him- 
 self. I have as little superstition as any 
 man living, and I acknowledge that there 
 is generally great confusion and inco- 
 herence in our dreams, and that many 
 ridiculous scenes are in those hours ob- 
 truded on us. But, however, I cannot 
 help concluding, from my own expe- 
 rience, that some of our dreams are the 
 effect of a divine agency. The most in- 
 teresting and most important occurrence 
 of my whole life was foretold me in a 
 dream, though it was not verified till 
 thirty years after the prediction. 
 
 I DO NOT KNOW any better rules or 
 maxims than the three following, which 
 were framed by the old monk, to enable
 
 144 DR. KING S ANECDOTES 
 
 a man to pass through life with ease and 
 security : 
 
 Nunquam male loqui de super ioribtis. 
 Fungi officio taliter qualiter. 
 Sinere insanum mundum vadar, quo vtdt ; nam vuU 
 vadere, quo vidt. 
 
 The first of these may be greatly im- 
 proved by adding St. *s precept, To 
 
 speak evil of no man. And whoever is so 
 happy, either from his natural disposition 
 or his good judgment, constantly to ob- 
 serve this precept, will certainly acquire 
 the love and esteem of the whole com- 
 munity of which he is a member. But 
 such a man is the rara avis in terris ; 
 and, among all my acquaintance, I have 
 known only one person to whom I can 
 with truth assio-n this character. The 
 person I mean is the present Lord Pjt-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 145 
 
 SLiGo of Scotland. I not only never 
 heard this gentleman speak an ill word 
 of any man living, but I always observed 
 him ready to defend any other person 
 who was ill spoken of in his company. If 
 the person accused were of his acquaint- 
 ance, my Lord Pitsligo would always 
 find something good to say of him as a 
 counterpoise. If he were a stranger, and 
 quite unknown to him, my lord M'ould 
 urge in his defence the general corrup- 
 tion of manners, and the frailties and 
 infirmities of human nature. 
 
 It is no wonder that such an excellent 
 man, who, besides, is a polite scholar, 
 and has many other great and good qua- 
 lities, should be universally admired and 
 beloved, insomuch, that I persuade my- 
 self he has not one enemy in the world. 
 
 L
 
 146 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 At least, to this general esteem and af- 
 fection for his person his preservation 
 must be owing. For, since his attainder*, 
 he has never removed far from his own 
 house, protected by men of different 
 principles, and unsought for and unmo- 
 lested by the government. 
 
 It was an absurd attempt of those 
 controversial writers, who endeavoured 
 to prove, against Warhurton, that the 
 ancient Jews believed the doctrine of 
 a future state ; since there is not any 
 
 * It was not ambition, but a love for his country, 
 and a conscientious regard to his duty, which drew 
 this honest man (however he might be mistaken) 
 into the rebellion of 1745. A great prince, who had 
 been well informed of my Lord Pitsligo's character, 
 would immediately have pardoned him, and have 
 restored the little estate which he had forfeited.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 147 
 
 where in the books of Moses so much 
 as a distant hint of this doctrine. The 
 whole of the Jewish religion is comprised 
 in the ten commandments j and, if we 
 believe that these laws were delivered to 
 Moses by God himself, we must likewise 
 believe that God himself determined that 
 the Jews should remain altogether ig- 
 norant of a future state. In these laws 
 the punishment which is threatened, and 
 the rewards which are promised, are 
 limited to this life only; for, although 
 offenders are threatened to be punished 
 in their posterity, even to the third and 
 fourth generation, yet this denunciation 
 of God*s vengeance would probably little 
 influence or restrain the actions of a 
 wicked man, who knew he should him- 
 self be insensible of the punishment 
 
 L 2
 
 148 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 which was to be inflicted. Warhurtorit 
 indeed, to support his favourite hypo- 
 thesis, declares his opinion, that this 
 punishment, denounced against the pos- 
 terity of those Jews who transgressed, 
 was more terrible to them than any per- 
 sonal punishment. But this is a postu- 
 latum which cannot be granted, and may 
 easily be disproved. 
 
 The promise of long life to a people 
 who had no prospect after it, and who 
 believed they were to die as the beasts 
 of the field, might be an inducement to 
 virtue, and to an obedience of the laws. 
 But was this promise always fulfilled? 
 Were not the best men among the Jews, 
 as in other nations, often cut off in their 
 youth ? Or was long life always a bless- 
 ing? We know it was not. Old age is
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 149 
 
 necessarily subjected to many infirmities 
 of the mind as well as of the body. And 
 the old age of Solomon^ who had been so 
 eminently distinguished by the oracle of 
 God, tarnished all the glory of his former 
 life and reign. 
 
 It hath been asserted by most of the 
 ancient and modern Christian writers, 
 and is acknowledged by Warburton, 
 that Moses, who had been bred up in all 
 the learning of the Egyptians, believed 
 the immortality of the soul, and a future 
 state of rewards and punishments. But 
 he carefully concealed this doctrine from 
 the people, in obedience, as may be sup- 
 posed, to the express command of God : 
 for, if it were not so, would not he have 
 taught a doctrine which he could have 
 applied with more efficacy to the esta-
 
 160 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 blishment of his power and government, 
 than all his other ordinances, or those 
 various arts and stratagems, which, from 
 time to time, he was obliged to make use 
 of to keep the people in subjection ? 
 
 It is difficult to pronounce with cer- 
 tainty against any Latin production, espe- 
 cially when the author has acquired a 
 reputation for his skill in that language ; 
 and yet nothing is more common than to 
 hear a little pedant, or a bare smatterer 
 in the Latin tongue, criticise the works 
 of an elegant scholar, and magisterially 
 affirm that such and such expressions are 
 not classical. I have even known some 
 persons, who were very conversant in the 
 Latin classics, which they had made their 
 principal study, expose themselves by a
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 151 
 
 too hasty censure of this kind. In the 
 year 1738, I published Miltonis Epis- 
 TOLA ad PoLLioNEM. As this was a 
 political satire, and nothing in the same 
 manner had been published before in this 
 country, it was universally read by those 
 who either understood, or pretended to 
 understand the language, and was fre- 
 quently extolled or condemned accord- 
 ing to the prejudice of party : there was 
 not a courtier, or a creature of the prime 
 minister's, who did not set himself up as 
 a profound critic, and censured the style 
 of a composition which perhaps he could 
 not read. However, I must confess there 
 were some men of learning who found 
 fault with the diction, and would not 
 allow the Latin to be pure and classical; 
 which sentence they pronounced either
 
 152 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 against the conviction of their own judg- 
 ment (a part which envy will often act), 
 or perhaps, which I rather suspect, for 
 want of a more intimate acquaintance 
 with the language. There were at that 
 time two gentlemen in London, Hume 
 Campbell, the late Lord Register of 
 Scotland, and Hooke, the author of the 
 Roman History, with whom I had always 
 lived in some degree of friendship : they 
 had both studied the ancient classics; 
 but doubting their own judgment, as 
 well as my sufficiency, they consulted 
 Maittaire, and desired his opinion of 
 the MiltonisEpistola, in respect only to 
 the Latinity. Maittaire marked eleven 
 expressions as unclassical. These were 
 communicated to me in a letter, which 
 my friends sent me to Oxford. The
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 153 
 
 same evening, by the return of the post, 
 I answered nine of Maittaire*s excep- 
 tions, and produced all my authorities 
 from Virgil, Ovid, and Tibullus ; and by 
 the post following I sent authorities for 
 the other two. I could not help re- 
 marking that Maittaire, some little time 
 before, had published new editions of 
 those poets, from whence I drew my au- 
 thorities, and had added a very copious 
 index to every author : and in these 
 indexes were to be found most of the 
 phrases to which he had excepted in the 
 
 MiLTONIS EpISTOLA. 
 
 When I published the oration, which 
 I pronounced at the opening of the Rad- 
 CLiFFE library, I was immediately at- 
 tacked by one Squire o^ Cambridge ^ who 
 hath since been greatly promoted in the
 
 154 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 church, and is, I think. Clerk of the 
 Closet to the Prince of Wales. He as- 
 serted that six or seven expressions in 
 this speech are barbarous Latin, though 
 they are all to be found in the best Latin 
 authors, as Terence^ Tully^ Ccesar^ Sailust, 
 &c. He was particularly so unfortunate 
 as to usher in his criticisms with con- 
 demning the phrase fortiter ^ co7istanter 
 sentire, and to spend three or four whole 
 pages to prove that this is neither-Latin 
 nor sense : that is, that Cicero could 
 neither write one nor the other ; for this 
 is Cicero's Latin, and not mine. See 
 the third book of his Tusculan Questions, 
 and his oration for Sulla. 
 
 The rest of this critic's answer consists 
 in low scurrilities and personal abuse, 
 such as may be always expected from
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 155 
 
 men of mean birth, who in whatever sta- 
 tion of life they may happen to be placed, 
 even when they attain the highest digni- 
 ties, and live within the air of the court, 
 always retain the language and manners 
 of their father's house. 
 
 Another person, from whom I received 
 the same rude and dirty treatment upon 
 the same occasion, was Dr. John Bur- 
 ton, a fellow of Eton College ; but he 
 had more discretion than Squire. He 
 did not venture to criticise any particular 
 passages, but censured my speech by the 
 lump, and condemned the whole as bad 
 Latin ; and to give the greater weight to 
 his criticism, he made no scruple to add 
 a false fact, roundly affirming, that I first 
 writ it in English., and then translated it 
 into Latin, as if he had stood bv me
 
 166 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 whilst I was writing. The rest of his 
 work is a collection of all the foul and 
 scurrilous names with which the Latin 
 language could furnish him, which he 
 hath liberally bestowed upon me, inter- 
 mixed with many praises and compli- 
 ments which he bestowed on himself. 
 I answered this performance by trans- 
 lating all the abusive names which were 
 given me, and the fine appellations which 
 Burton had assumed to himself; and I 
 printed the whole catalogue on a large 
 sheet of coarse paper, such as Grub- 
 street ballads are generally printed on, 
 and delivered the impression, which was 
 a very large one, to a scavenger, to be 
 cried about the streets of Oxford, Wind- 
 sor, and Eton. And in truth, this is the 
 only proper answer that can be made to
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 157 
 
 a work of this kind ; for foul language 
 and hard names, when a man does not 
 deserve them, like an overcharged gun, 
 will always recoil on the author. 
 
 Clodius accusat moechos, &c. is a 
 character which is to be found in every 
 country. How often have I heard a sor- 
 did miser accuse his neighbour of avarice, 
 and a prodigal spendthrift prescribe rules 
 of economy ! Lee, who is the proudest 
 man, and the greatest hypocrite in Eng- 
 landj preaches against pride and hypo- 
 crisy, and Burton, whom I have men- 
 tioned above*, officiously concerns him- 
 self in the private affairs of every family 
 
 Who, whilst I am writing this, hath published 
 three sermons on the following text, That ye study 
 
 TO BE aUIET AND DO YOUR OWN BUSINESS.
 
 158 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 to which he is admitted, at the same time 
 neglecting his own business and his duty 
 as a parish priest. In these sermons like- 
 wise, the preacher, who is rude, over- 
 bearing, and in every respect very ill- 
 bred, enlarges with great vehemence on 
 the duty of good manners, and decent 
 and polite behaviour. Non vides id man- 
 ticce, &c. may perhaps be urged as some 
 kind of apology for- Burton, and all 
 others of the same cast and complexion, 
 who are so vain and opinionative, that 
 they are unable to espy any fault in 
 themselves. But the hypocrite is sen- 
 sible of the crime which he practises to 
 deceive you, and knows he is masked, 
 and for the same purpose as an highway- 
 man who robs with a piece of black crape 
 on his face.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 159 
 
 SoMNiUM AcADEMici. I mounted with 
 great velocity above the clouds, until I 
 found myself in the middle region of 
 the air. Here was a new world, which 
 I soon perceived to be the seat of happy 
 souls; who, after they shall have con- 
 tinued in it the space of 10,000 years, 
 will be removed to a more glorious orb, 
 and again, after some ages, to another, 
 still ascending higher and higher, till 
 after some millions of years they attain 
 the last state of purification. Every 
 scene which presented itself to my view 
 filled me with delight, and I felt a plea- 
 sure which no man who treads on the 
 earth is capable of enjoying or describing. 
 Although there were myriads of inhabit- 
 ants in this happy region, yet there were 
 no wars. or tumults, no quarrels or dis-
 
 160 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 putes, no disorder or confusion. For as 
 here were no ranks, titles, or distinctions, 
 but all were equal, and were sensible 
 likewise that this equality must ever re- 
 main, so there was no place for pride 
 or ambition, for envy or hatred, for 
 poverty or riches, or for that mad zeal 
 and enthusiasm, by which so many flou- 
 rishing states and kingdoms of the earth 
 have been totally ruined. Every soul I 
 met with saluted me in a most courteous 
 manner; and I knew at first sight not 
 only some of my contemporaries, but 
 many eminent persons, who are recorded 
 both in ancient and modern history, and 
 some who have been dead near 3000 
 years. The first I particularly remarked 
 was Ovid, in a circle of the best and 
 most learned poets of the Augustan
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 161 
 
 age, amongst whom I observed seven of 
 my countrymen, Chaucer^ SpenseVy Wal- 
 ler, Cowley y TValsIi, Par7iel and Gai/ : znd 
 I saw at a small distance Szvift, and Ar- 
 buthnot coming^to join them. As I always 
 loved and admired Ovid for the elegancy 
 of his wit, and the sweetness of his man- 
 ners, I] addressed myself to him ; he re- 
 ceived me with great politeness, and we 
 presently entered into an easy and familiar 
 conversation. He acquainted me with 
 many curious anecdotes of the court of 
 Augustus, and some very remarkable oc- 
 currences of his own time, as well as 
 of the former ages of Rome, which no 
 historian hath mentioned ; this led me to 
 inquire of him the cause of his banish- 
 ment, which I told him was unknown to 
 the world at this day ; at the same time 
 
 M
 
 1^ DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 I acquainted him with the ridiculous 
 conjectures of his commentators. He 
 seemed a little surprised, and assured me 
 that the day he went into banishment, 
 the emperor's whole court, and all the 
 citizens of Rome, knew the real cause of 
 his disgrace, and he wondered that an 
 affair which was so public at that time 
 should not have been transmitted to 
 posterity together with his works. He 
 asked me whether I had ever considered 
 with attention the following lines : 
 
 Cur aliquid vidi ? Cur noxia luminajeci ? 
 
 Cur imprudenti cognita culpa mihi ? 
 Inscitis Actceon vidit sine veste Dianam : 
 
 Pradajuit canibus non minus ille suis. 
 Scilicet in superis etiam fortuna luenda est : 
 
 Nee veniam Iccso numine casus habet. 
 
 In this passage, says Ovid, I have plainly 
 intimated that my disgrace was owing to
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 163 
 
 something which I had inadvertently 
 seen, and not to any crime. I will tell 
 you the story in a few words : I was ac- 
 quainted with a lady of the court, whose 
 name was Clodia; she was descended 
 from an old Patrician family, and was 
 about thirty years of age. She had a 
 good face, was well shaped, and did not 
 want wit. Her behaviour was modest, 
 and her reputation untouched. I was 
 always pleased to be of her party, and 
 she seemed to be very fond of my com- 
 pany. As I had leave to visit at all 
 hours, it unfortunately happened, that, 
 entering her apartment one morning 
 very early, I found the old emperor with 
 her, and in such an attitude, as convinced 
 me that my female friend was not a Lu- 
 cretia. I retired with great precipita- 
 
 M 2
 
 164 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 tion ; but I feared that I was undone 
 from that moment. The jealousy and 
 vindictive temper of Augustus;, and the 
 rage of the lady in being thus disco- 
 vered, soon pronounced my sentence. 
 However, this punishment, which I so piti- 
 fully complained of in all my letters from 
 Tomos, and which I then considered as 
 the greatest calamity, really proved the 
 most fortunate circumstance of my life ; 
 for during my exile I made many just 
 and serious reflections, which I never 
 allowed myself to make in my prosperity, 
 which purified my passions, and at length 
 disposed my mind to resign itself to the 
 will of providence. I was extremely 
 pleased with this account which Ovid 
 gave me of himself, and to be so par- 
 ticularly informed of the real cause of
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 165 
 
 his banishment, which I resolved to pub- 
 lish the first opportunity, for the benefit 
 of the learned world. Here, the Roman 
 poet more attentively considering me, 
 asked me, " whether I was dead?" I told 
 him, " I was not: but I hoped, as 1 was 
 old and infirm, this would soon be my 
 fate, and that I should be destined to 
 ascend again to those happy mansions, 
 and frequently have the pleasure of find- 
 ing myself in the same circle.'* This hu- 
 mane and gentle spirit encouraged me to 
 ask him an hundred questions concern- 
 ing RomCf and the state of literature in 
 the Augustan age : and I concluded with 
 requesting him to give me the real cha- 
 racter of the emperor. " If I were 
 capable," says Ovid, " of feeling any 
 remorse or disquietude in these happy
 
 166 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 regions, the flattering speeches which I 
 bestowed on the emperor would create 
 in my mind no small uneasiness. He 
 by no means deserved any part of that 
 veneration which was so universally paid 
 him. He was false, cruel, and inexora- 
 ble ; and the bloody executions which he 
 ordered during his triumvirate, and the 
 great number of persons of quality and 
 distinguished merit whom he put to 
 death upon the slightest suspicion, after 
 he was sole emperor, w^ere a sufficient 
 proof of his natural disposition, and must 
 stain his memory as long as his name 
 shall be remembered in the world. He 
 put his tutor and companion to death, 
 and with his own hands pulled out the 
 eyes of Aulus Gellius the praetor. He 
 was not softened by age, or moved by
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 16^ 
 
 the widow or orphan. You see that all 
 my submissions, and the united interest 
 of all my noble friends, could not prevail 
 on him to grant me so small a favour as 
 to change the place of my banishment ; 
 though he was conscious that I had been 
 guilty of no crime. I doubt whether he 
 had personal courage : it is certain he 
 had no fortitude of mind; a thunder- 
 storm would drive him into a vault, or 
 into any dark hole where he thought the 
 lightning could not reach him. He was 
 a sordid lover of money : and although 
 he could command the wealth of the 
 whole world, he was never generous to 
 men of honour, nor ever bestowed a 
 princely reward on any person of great 
 merit and learning. Virgil and Ho- 
 race owed their fortunes to Maecenas
 
 168 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 only. The latter was content with a 
 moderate estate, and as he knew Au- 
 gustus perfectly well, he declined ac- 
 cepting some lucrative offices which had 
 been offered him ; but which required 
 his personal attendance on the emperor. 
 To conclude the character of this man, 
 he was every day guilty of some base and 
 mean action, either to gratify his lust and 
 avarice, or to discover the real sentiments 
 of the Roman people*." When Ovid 
 had done, I repeated Scaliger^s verses, 
 in which he introduces our poet speaking 
 to Augustus. Ovid seemed to be much 
 pleased with the two last lines, 
 
 Cum te laudarem, tunc sum mentitus : ob unum hoc 
 Exiliijuerat debita causa mihi. 
 
 How were we degenerated when we made this 
 man a God !
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 169 
 
 The art of speaking in public 
 seems to be little understood in this 
 country, notwithstanding the necessity 
 of practising it so frequently in the se- 
 nate, in the pulpit, and at the bar ; and 
 notwithstanding a good speaker in any 
 profession may always make his way to 
 riches and honours : a pulpit orator can 
 scarce fail of arriving to some eminent 
 dignity in the church, and a lawyer, with 
 the same talents, of obtaining some of 
 those great offices annexed to his profes- 
 sion. Even in the practice of physic 
 this talent will be found very useful : and 
 I knew a physician, who, although he 
 had a very moderate share of medical 
 knowledge, and was little skilled in the 
 learned languages, yet by the assistance 
 of strong natural parts, with an happy
 
 170 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 and graceful maimer of speaking and 
 addressing his patients, acquired by his 
 practice 3000/. a year. It is a matter 
 therefore of astonishment to me, that the 
 art of speaking is not more diligently 
 cultivated in the British Islands, espe- 
 cially in the universities, where it ought 
 to be studied with the greatest assiduity. 
 To this neglect must be imputed that 
 languid manner in which our clergy 
 generally deliver their sermons ; so that 
 a discourse, which may be unexception- 
 able as to its doctrine or argument, or 
 even its language, will be so far from ex- 
 citing the devotion, or convincing the 
 judgment of the congregation, that it 
 will not command their attention. Ci- 
 cero, in his beautiful treatise De OratorCy 
 quotes an expression of RosciuSy the cele-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 171 
 
 brated comedian, Caput artis est, Decere, 
 which is a very significant word, and in 
 truth means every thing by which the 
 speaker may conciliate the esteem and 
 affection, and acquire the applause of 
 his audience. Action, to which De- 
 mosthenes attributes the whole excellency 
 of an orator, is comprehended in this 
 expression. And here, in regard to 
 ACTION, I will mention one thing, which 
 I do not remember to have been remarked 
 by any of our countrymen who have 
 treated on this subject, that the speaker's 
 action must be accommodated to the 
 genius and manners of his country ; for 
 the same action which may please in one 
 country, would not be suffered in another. 
 I could name some eminent preachers, 
 who were the admiration of all Paris,
 
 172 DR. KINGS ANECDOlTiS 
 
 and yet, on account of their action, would 
 have been ridiculed by an English con- 
 gregation. And, moreover, I venture 
 on this occasion to affirm, that however 
 a player may be taught action, yet the 
 action of an orator must always be natural, 
 and the effect of those expressions by 
 which he is animated. My friends have 
 often assured me, that whenever I spoke 
 in the theatre, they were pleased with 
 my action: but I scarce knew when I 
 used it, and when I did not, and it was 
 always produced by what I felt within. 
 
 The young gentlemen who spoke verses 
 in the theatre when the Earl of Westmor- 
 land was installed Chancellor of the 
 University were taught their action by 
 Sheridan the player. But their action 
 was outree and ungraceful. Now, be-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 173 
 
 sides his action, the speaker should take 
 care to be properly dressed, suitably to 
 his age, his station, and his country. 
 This is an instruction certainly included 
 in the Decere, and however insignificant 
 it may be thought by some, is of no small 
 advantage ; more especially if the orator 
 be a graceful person, which scarce ever 
 fails to prejudice the audience in his 
 favour*. 
 
 It is a great defect in the education of 
 
 * Valerius Maximus mentions only three great 
 Roman orators, C. Gracchus, Cicero, and Hor- 
 TENSius. Of the last he remarks, Q. Hortensius 
 plurimum in corporis decoro motu repositum credens, 
 pene plus studii in eodem elaborando, quam in ipsa 
 eloquentia affedanda impendit. And he adds, Itaqite 
 constat ^sopuM et Roscium ludicrce artis peritissi- 
 mos viros, illo (sell. Hortensio) causas agente, in 
 corona frequenter nstltisse, ut foro petitos gestus in 
 scenam rejerrent.
 
 174 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 our youth, in both the universities, that 
 they do not sufficiently apply themselves 
 to the study of their mother tongue. 
 By this means it happens, that some 
 very learned men and polite scholars are 
 not able to express themselves with pro- 
 priety in common conversation, and that 
 when they are discoursing on a subject 
 which they understand perfectly well. I 
 have been acquainted with * three persons 
 only who spoke English with that elegance 
 and propriety, that if all they said had 
 been immediately committed to writing, 
 any judge of the English language would 
 have pronounced it an excellent and very 
 
 * Attekburv, the exiled Bishop of Rochester. 
 Dr. GowER, Provost of W^orcester College. 
 Johnson, the author of the English Dictionary, 
 of the Bambler, &c. .
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 175 
 
 beautiful style. And yet among the 
 French and Italians we meet with few 
 learned men who are not able to express 
 themselves with ease and elegance in 
 their own language ; and if the same 
 freedom of speech were allowed in the 
 parliament of Farts, or senate of Rome, 
 which may be used in an English house 
 of commons, their orators would be more 
 numerous and eminent than we can boast 
 of. Observing this defect so universal 
 in the English nation, I have always ad- 
 vised the young gentlemen who were 
 under my care in the university, or with 
 whom I had any connexion or acquaint- 
 ance (especially those who had parts, 
 and discovered an inclination to improve 
 themselves), to get by heart a page in one 
 of our English classics every morning, in'
 
 170 DR. KIND'S ANECDOTES 
 
 order to speak their own tongue with 
 facility, and acquire a good style in 
 writing. This method I once recom- 
 mended to two brothers, young gentle- 
 men of a noble family, who had been 
 educated in Holland, and on their return 
 to their own country could speak no other 
 language than French or Dutch : they 
 pursued my advice with such assiduity 
 that they both became eminent speakers 
 in parliament ; and the eldest, who is 
 now a peer, is esteemed inferior to no 
 orator in the House of Lords. But after 
 all, in my opinion, the art of oratory is 
 not to be taught ; it must be use and 
 experience, and a man's own judgment, 
 which must form the orator. There is 
 sometimes a certain crisis in the public 
 affairs, but oftener it is the nature of
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 177 
 
 the government which excites youth to 
 the study of eloquence. For fifty or 
 sixty years before the ruin of the Roman 
 republic there were more orators in Rome 
 than are now to be found in all Europe ; 
 and yet I doubt whether in Rome, during 
 the same period, there were as many 
 learned men and profound scholars as are 
 this day existing in the British Islands. 
 Cicero affirms, that no man can be a 
 PERFECT orator unless he be well skilled 
 in all other arts and sciences; but his con- 
 temporaries seem to have been of a dif- 
 ferent opinion. The Roman senators 
 generally thought they had a sufficient 
 stocl^ of learning if they were well skilled 
 in the civil law, and understood the 
 Greek language j and our parliament 
 orators esteem themselves learned men, 
 
 N
 
 178 PR. KINGS ANECPOTES 
 
 if. tbey are pretty we'll acquainted with 
 the British constitution *. The most emi- 
 nent lawyers in England, who by a con- 
 stant use and practice must necessarily 
 be ready speakers, know very little oiit 
 of their own profession. For a century 
 and an half we have had only two High 
 Chancellors who could be called learned 
 men, though many of them have been 
 reputed excellent orators : and in our 
 days, the man who enjoyed this great 
 
 * Amongst our numerous pleaders at the bar, I 
 never heard any one argue methodically except my 
 Lord Mansfield ; which I ascribe to the logical 
 lectures which he attended in the university. I have 
 heard his predecessor Rider, when he was Attorney- 
 general, introduce all his arguments in such a con- 
 fused and indistinct manner, that, although he said 
 perhaps on the occasion all that could be said, yet I 
 Was not able to retain any part of his speech. He 
 waa in other respects a very ungraceful speaker.
 
 f ^F mS' OWN TIMESf ||9 
 
 office for twenty years, and during that 
 time dictated to the House of Peers, did 
 not learn Latin, as I am well assured, 
 until after he was made Lord Chancellor. 
 Sir Robert Walpole, who by his ora- 
 tory raised himself from a small estate to 
 the height of power, and disposed of all 
 employments in the British dominions 
 for many years, had not any great stock 
 of learning. He^ w^as indeed not unskilled 
 in the classics ; some knowledge of those 
 5iuthorshe could not but retain, as h^ 
 had been formerly a fellow of a College 
 in Cambridge. I knew Sir Willian; 
 "Wyndham, who was allowed to be tjbe 
 best and most graceful speaker in the 
 House of Commons for many years be- 
 fore he died, but he. was. not eminent in 
 any branch of literature. Mr. Pitt, who 
 
 N 2
 
 180 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 has acquired such a great reputation for 
 his eloquence, and a greater still for his 
 administration, and the success which 
 has attended it, has not much learning 
 to boast of, unless it be some little ac- 
 quaintance with the Latin classics. I 
 could name several others, in both Houses 
 of Parliament, who are busy speakers, 
 and harangue on all occasions, who would 
 be greatly puzzled in reading one of 
 Ttd!j/'s orations. The truth is, that not 
 only all philosophical studies, and the 
 abstruser sciences, are of little use to our 
 parliament orators, but even without a 
 tincture of what we call polite literature, 
 they are many of them able to talk them- 
 selves into esteem and good employ- 
 ments. Every age produces men (*very 
 
 * Two or three perhaps in a centwry. Such men
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 181 
 
 few indeed) who seem to be orators 
 born, who not only without the aid of 
 learning, but without use and exercise, 
 which are so necessary to the formation 
 of an orator, are endowed with a talent 
 of speaking and replying readily and 
 fluently. I have heard a speech from 
 Hodges, the present town-clerk of Lon- 
 don (who was bred a bookseller, and I 
 am well assured is unskilled in any lan- 
 guage but his own), which gave me more 
 pleasure and satisfaction than I have re- 
 ceived from the harangues of many of 
 our celebrated orators, whether at the 
 
 may properly be called geniuses. Indeed our me- 
 thodists and our enthusiasts of all denominations 
 pretend to the gift of speaking ; and it must be ac- 
 knowledged they speak with great fluency and volu- 
 bility : but it is always a flow of absurdities, blas- 
 phemy, and nonsense.
 
 182 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 bar or in the senate. But, after all, a 
 man who has good parts and a good 
 judgment, and is ambitious of acquiring 
 the character of an orator, should form 
 himself after the ancient Greek and Ro- 
 man models. He should study with great 
 application the orations of Demosthenes 
 and Tully i and he should always have 
 before him that most excellent work of 
 Tully *s, De Oratore^ wherein the precepts 
 are conveyed in such a pure and elegant 
 style, that the same are the best exam- 
 ples of what this great author proposes 
 to teach. 
 
 Butler, who was predecessor to the 
 present Bishop of Durham, being applied 
 to on some occasion for a charitable sub- 
 scription, asked his steward what money
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 183 
 
 he had in the house. The steward in- 
 formed him, " there was five hundred 
 pounds." " Five hu^ndred pounds!'* said 
 the Bishop : " what a shame for a Bishop 
 to have such a sum in his possession T* 
 and ordered it all to be immediately given 
 to the poor. That spirit of charity and 
 benevolence which possessed this excel- 
 lent man hath not appeared in any other 
 part of the hierarchy since the beginning 
 of the present century. His successor. 
 Dr. Trevor, .possessed of a large estate, 
 besides the revenue of his rich bishopric, 
 has a different turn of mind, but in com- 
 mon with many of his own order. To 
 speak freely, I know nothing that has 
 brought so great a reproach on the 
 Church of England as the avarice and 
 ambition of our bishops. Chandler,
 
 184 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 Bishop of Durham, Willis, Bishop of 
 Winchester, Potter, Archbishop of 
 Canterbury, Gibson and Sherlock, 
 Bishops of London, all died shamefully 
 rich, some of them worth more than 
 100,000/. 1 must add to these my 
 old antagonist Gilbert, predecessor 
 to Drujimond, the present Archbishop 
 of York. Some of these prelates were 
 esteemed great divines (and I know they 
 were learned men), but they could not 
 be called good Christians. The great 
 wealth which they heaped up, the fruits 
 of their bishoprics, and which they left 
 to enrich their families, was not their 
 own ; it was due to God, to the church, 
 to their poor brethren. The history of 
 the good Samaritan^ whicli was so par- 
 ticularly explained by Christ himself to
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 185 
 
 his disciples, ought to be a monitory to 
 all their successors. I knew Burnett, 
 Bishop of Salisbury: he was a furious 
 party-man, and easily imposed on by any 
 lying spirit of his own faction j but he 
 was a better pastor than any man who is 
 now seated on the bishops' bench. Al- 
 though he left a large family when he 
 died, three sons and two daughters (if I 
 rightly remember), yet he left them no- 
 thing more than their mother's fortune. 
 He always declared, that he should think 
 himself guilty of the greatest crime, if 
 he were to raise fortunes for his children 
 out of the revenue of his bishopric. It 
 was no small misfortune to the cause of 
 Christianity in this kingdom, that when 
 we reformed from popery, our clergy 
 were permitted to marry ; from that
 
 186 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 period their only care (which was na- 
 tural, and must have been foreseen) was 
 to provide for their wives and children ; 
 this the dignitaries, who had ample reve- 
 nues, could easily effect, with the loss, 
 however, of that respect and veneration 
 which they formerly received on account 
 of their hospitality* and numerous chari- 
 ties; but the greatest part of the in- 
 ferior clergy were incapable of making 
 a provision for sons and daughters, and 
 soon left families of beggars in every 
 part of the kingdom. I do not inquire 
 whether chastity ought to be a requisite 
 
 * In the epistle which is read at the consecration 
 of our bishops, it is required of them amongst other 
 injunctions, that they should be given to hospitality, 
 not given to filthy lucre, not covetous. They likewise 
 solemnly promise to assist thh indigefit, and all 
 strangers tuho are destitute qfhdp.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 187 
 
 in those who are ordained to serve at the 
 altar (it certainly adds a grace and dig- 
 nity to their function), but I cannot help 
 observing that our government makes 
 no difference between a bishop's wife and 
 his concubine ; the wife has no place or 
 precedence, she does not share in her 
 husband's honours ; although the creation 
 of a simple knight, whose honours, like 
 the bishop's, are for life only, gives a 
 rank and title to his wife. Moreover, 
 as an academician, and friend to the re- 
 public of letters, I have often wished 
 that the canons which forbid priests to 
 marry were still in force. To the. celi- 
 bacy of the bishops we owe almost all 
 those noble foundations which are esta- 
 blished in both our Universities j but 
 since the Reformation, we can boast of
 
 1S8 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 few of the episcopal order as benefactors 
 to these seats of learning. The munifi- 
 cent donations of Laud and Sheldon, 
 in the last century, will, indeed, ever be 
 remembered J but let it likewise be re- 
 membered, that these two prelates were 
 unmarried. Since the commencement 
 of the present century, I do not recollect 
 one of our Right Reverends who ought 
 to be recorded as an eminent patron of 
 learning, or learned men ; but this will 
 not appear very wonderful, if we con- 
 sider by what spirit they were dignified 
 hand equidem spiritii sane to. And yet 
 in the consecration of these conge d'elire 
 bishops, they are said to be called to this 
 work by the Holy Ghost j and in their 
 answer to the archbishop, they seem to 
 affirm it of themselves.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 189 
 
 QuuM A poTENTissiMis ilHs viHs, qui 
 hujiis Imperii res et rationes procu- 
 rant, et gubernant, nulla praemia aut 
 munera mihi petii, aut fortasse unquam 
 exoptavi, san^ quidem miror, quo malo 
 fato natus tot inimicitias ego contraxe- 
 rim, aut quae sit causa, quamobrem viri 
 nequissimi me praecipu^ ex omnibus ele- 
 gerint, in quern inveherentur ; etiam 
 quern accusarent graviorum criminum, 
 et eorundem flagitiorum, qua? insani, 
 quas perjuri, atque ut uno verbo omnia 
 dicam, qu ipsi fecerunt et prop^ quo- 
 tidi^ faciunt; ut baud sciam profecto, 
 an malus iste Deus horum hominum et 
 calumniatorum omnium princeps et ma- 
 gister usque adeo maledicere et mentiri 
 auderet. 
 
 This complaint is occasioned by a
 
 190 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 most infamous advertisement published 
 about this time (Nov, 1761) in a news- 
 paper, on purpose to defame me, for no 
 other reason but because as a member 
 of the University I attended my brethren, 
 when with the whole body (our chanr 
 cellor at their head) they waited on the 
 King with an address of congratulation 
 on his Majesty's marriage with the Prin- 
 cess of Mecklenburgh. I have been re- 
 viled hitherto as a Jacobite, and nowil 
 am censured for going to court. Of ipy 
 political principles, and the little concern 
 I have had in public transactions,;! will 
 hereafter give a very candid' ^(icouijt. 
 But here I only ^'desire it may be ob- 
 served, that my enemies of both parties 
 are the lowest of the people, who, besides 
 the scurrilous appellations which they
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES; 191 
 
 have constantly bestc^wied on ie, have 
 never scrupled to invent the most atro- 
 cious calumnies, and to charge me with 
 crimes which my honest soul abhors. 
 I have before taken notice of the illiberal 
 criticisms of Burton^ and of the railing 
 accusations brought, against me by th'e 
 execrable Blacow, the famous dignified 
 infor^ler ; I could not but expect from 
 these men all that malice could forge 
 and impudence would publish: but it 
 never entered into my thoughts that a 
 nonjuring clergyman, who values him- 
 self much upon the sanctity of his man- 
 ners, and with whom I had once lived in 
 some degree of friendship, should con- 
 spire with two or three villanous at- 
 torneys, who for a small bribe would 
 swear away any man*s life, to traduce
 
 192 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 me by a public advertisement. How- 
 ever, I have now learned by my own ex- 
 perience, as also by the information of 
 some of my particular friends, that the 
 zeal of our non-juror grows more fu- 
 rious as he grows in years ; and yet he 
 thinks every act not only lawful but 
 expedient which may serve to blacken a 
 man*s character, who, he imagines, has 
 deserted his party, and been guilty of the 
 crime of going to court*. I don't know 
 
 There is indeed a latent cause of this man's 
 enmity to me, besides the reason which he hath 
 given the public for his resentment. I have lately 
 been unfortunately engaged in a law-suit with one 
 James Bettenham a printer, a sanctified member 
 of Gordon's congregation, but one of the greatest 
 knaves I have ever known. This man, who had 
 great obligations to me, and taken a great deal of 
 my money, endeavoured in settling a final account 
 to cheat me of lOOl. In this attempt he was as-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 193 
 
 whether he would be a martyr, but no 
 man is a greater enthusiast in religion 
 than he is in the Jacobite cause. Here- 
 ditary right and passive obedience are the 
 chief articles of his creed. Talk to him 
 of public spirit and the amor patricB, 'tis a 
 language which he does not understand; 
 for he would be content to see the 
 nation involved in a general ruin, and 
 the extirpation of three or four millions 
 of our people, if by that means the 
 House of Stuart might be restored. And 
 this is the doctrine which he teaches in 
 the little congregation over which he 
 presides as a pastor ; where, while he 
 boasts of the purity of his religion, and a 
 
 sisted and justified by his father confessor. The 
 whole proceedings in this afifair I propose to publish 
 immediately.
 
 104 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 Steady adherence to his political system, 
 he departs from every principle of hu- 
 manity, and devotes his country to ruin. 
 And in truth this personal abuse of me 
 for no other reason but for an act of 
 duty, which was required from me by 
 the body corporate of which I am a 
 member, was intended as a reflection on 
 my superiors. Our zealot is enraged to 
 see the extinction of faction, and such an 
 harmony established amongst all orders 
 and degrees as must necessarily prove 
 our principal security. The nonjurors 
 are now become a very insignificant and 
 contemptible party. And although the 
 Roman Catholics would certainly be very 
 glad to see their religion re-established in 
 this country, yet there are few amongst 
 them who would engage in any despe-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 195 
 
 rate measures for this purpose ; and 
 desperate they must be, when the odds 
 are perhaps more than a thousand to one 
 that an attempt of this kind does not 
 succeed: which, as long as the present 
 union of our people and their attach- 
 ment to the sovereign subsist, may fairly 
 be asserted. The means by which this 
 union hath been eflPected must needs be 
 a matter of inquiry amongst all foreign 
 politicians, since our own observe it with 
 a kind of wonder. A continual success 
 in the conduct of our public affairs, and 
 a series of victories, may justly be al- 
 leged as one of the principal causes of 
 uniting many of those (however they 
 have been distinguished by party) who 
 are real lovers of their country. But this 
 would not have reduced the Jacobite 
 
 o 2
 
 196 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 interest to the low condition in which we 
 see it at present, unless some more power- 
 ful motives had influenced the leaders 
 of that party to change their principles 
 and desert a cause, to which they had 
 so stedfastly adhered for so many years. 
 As I can in some measure account for 
 this defection, I shall probably render 
 an acceptable service to many of my 
 countrymen and satisfy the inquiries 
 of posterity by publishing an anecdote, 
 which I am now under no obligations 
 to conceal, and which as the affairs of 
 Britain are at present circumstanced, it 
 would, in my opinion, be criminal in me 
 to suppress. 
 
 September 1750, I received a note 
 from my Lady Primrose, who desired 
 to see me immediately. As soon as I
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 197 
 
 waited on her, she led me into her dress- 
 ing-room, and presented me to *. 
 
 If I was surprised to find him there, I 
 was still more astonished when he ac- 
 quainted me with the motives which had 
 induced him to hazard a journey to Eng- 
 land at this juncture. The impatience of 
 his friends who were in exile had formed 
 a scheme which was impracticable ; but 
 although it had been as feasible as they 
 had represented it to him, yet no pre- 
 paration had been made, nor was any 
 thing ready to carry it into execution. 
 He was soon convinced that he had 
 been deceived, and therefore, after a 
 stay in London of five days only, he 
 returned to the place from whence he 
 came. As I had some long conversa- 
 * The Pretender.
 
 198 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 tions with him here, and for some years 
 after held a constant correspondence 
 with him, not indeed by letters but by 
 messengers*, who were occasionally de- 
 spatched to him ; and as during this in- 
 tercourse I informed myself of all parti- 
 culars relating to him and of his whole 
 conduct, both in public and private life, 
 I am perhaps as well qualified as any 
 man in England to draw a just character 
 of him ; and I impose this task on my- 
 self not only for the information of pos- 
 terity, but for the sake of many worthy 
 gentlemen whom I shall leave behind 
 me, who are at present attached to his 
 name, and who have formed their ideas 
 
 * These were not common couriers, but gentlemen 
 of fortune, honour, and veracity, and on whose rela- 
 tions I could entirely depend.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 199 
 
 of him from public report, but more par- 
 ticularly from those great actions which 
 he performed in Scotland. As to his per- 
 son, he is tall and well-made, but stoops 
 a little, owing perhaps to the great fa- 
 tigue which he underwent in his northern 
 expedition. He has an handsome face 
 and good eyes; (I think* his busts, 
 which about this time were commonly 
 sold in London, are more like him than 
 any of his pictures which I have yet 
 
 * He came one evening to my lodgings and drank 
 tea with me : my servant, after he was gone, said to 
 me, " that he thought my new visitor very like 
 Prince Charles." " .Why," said I, " have you ever 
 seen Prince Charles ?" " No, sir/' replied the fellow, 
 " but this gentleman, whoever he may be, exactly 
 resembles the busts which are sold in Red-lion-street, 
 and are said to be the busts of Prince Charles." The 
 truth is, these busts were taken in plaster of Paris 
 from his face.
 
 200 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 seen ;) but in a polite company he would 
 not pass for a genteel man. He hath a 
 quick apprehension, and speaks French, 
 Italian, and English, the last with a 
 little of a foreign accent. As to the 
 rest, very little care seems to have been 
 taken of his education. He had not 
 made the belles lettres or any of the 
 finer arts his study, which surprised me 
 much, considering his preceptors, and the 
 noble opportunities he must have always 
 had in that nursery * of all the elegant 
 and liberal arts and science. But I was 
 
 * Rome. His governor was- a protestant, and I 
 am apt to believe purposedly neglected his education, 
 of which it is surmised he made a merit to the En- 
 glish ministry} for he was always supposed to be 
 their pensioner. The Chevalier Ramsay, the author 
 of Cyrus, was Prince Charles's preceptor for about a 
 year j but a court faction removed him.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 201 
 
 still more astonished, when I found him 
 unacquainted with the history and con- 
 stitution of England^ in which he ought 
 to have been very early instructed. I 
 never heard him express any noble or 
 benevolent sentiments, the certain indi- 
 cations of a great soul and a good heart; 
 or discover any sorrow or compassion for 
 the misfortunes of so many worthy men 
 who had suffered in his cause*. But the 
 most odious part of his character is his 
 love of money, a vice which I <io not 
 
 * As to his religion, he is certainly free from all 
 bigotry and superstition, and would readily conform 
 to the religion of the country. With the catholics 
 he is a catholic ; with the protcstants he is a pro- 
 testant ; and, to convince the latter of his sincerity, 
 he often carried an English Common Prayer-book in 
 his pocket: and sent to Gordon (whom I have men- 
 tioned before), a nonjuring clergyman, to christen 
 the first child he had by Mrs, W.
 
 202 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 remember to have been imputed by our 
 historians to any of his ancestors, and is 
 the certain index of a base and little 
 mind. I know it may be urged in his 
 vindication, that a prince in exile ought 
 to be an economist. And so he ought j 
 but nevertheless his purse should be al- 
 ways open, as long as there is any thing 
 in it to relieve the necessities of his 
 friends and adherents. King Charles the 
 second, during his banishment, would 
 have shared the last pistole in his pocket 
 with his little family. But I have known 
 this gentleman with two thousand Louis- 
 d'ors in his strong box pretend he was in 
 great distress, and borrow money from a 
 lady in Paris, who was not in affluent 
 circumstances. His most faithful ser- 
 vants, who had closely attended him in
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 203 
 
 all his difficulties, were ill rewarded^ 
 Two Frenchmen, who had left every 
 thing to follow his fortune, who had been 
 sent as couriers through half Europe, 
 and executed their commissions with 
 great punctuality and exactness, were 
 suddenly discharged without any faults 
 imputed to them, or any recompense for 
 their past service. To this spirit of ava- 
 rice may be added his insolent manner 
 of treating his immediate dependants, 
 very unbecoming a great prince, and a 
 sure prognostic of what might be ex- 
 pected from him if ever he acquired 
 sovereign power. Sir J. Harrington*, 
 
 * Sir J. Harrington remained in banishment till 
 the accession of the present King George III. No 
 man is better acquainted with the private history and 
 character of Prince Charles, and, if ever he reads 
 what I have here written, I am confident that he 
 will readily vouch the truth of my narrative.
 
 204 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 and *Col. Goring, who suffered them- 
 selves to be imprisoned with him, rather 
 than desert him, when the rest of his 
 family and attendants fled, were after- 
 wards obliged to quit his service on ac- 
 count of his illiberal behaviour. But 
 there is one part of his character, which 
 I must particularly insist on, since it 
 occasioned the defection of the most 
 powerful of his friends and adherents in 
 England, and by some concurring acci- 
 dents totally blasted all his hopes and 
 pretensions. When he was in Scotland, 
 he had a mistress, whose name is Walk- 
 
 Goring, upon quitting his service, was recom- 
 mended by my Lord Marshal to the King of Prussia, 
 who immediately gave him a command in his army, 
 equal to his pretensions. Goring died soon after, 
 and his loss was greatly lamented by his Prussian 
 Majesty, who honoured him with a character in a 
 letter to my Lord Marshal.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 205 
 
 enshaw, and whose sister was at that 
 time, and is still housekeeper at Leicester 
 House. Some years after he was released 
 from his prison, and conducted out of 
 France, he sent for this girl, who soon ac- 
 quired such a dominion over him, that she 
 was acquainted with all his schemes, and 
 trusted with his most secret correspond- 
 ence. As soon as this was known in 
 England, all those persons of distinction, 
 who were attached to him, were greatly 
 alarmed ; they imagined that this wench 
 had been placed in his family by the En- 
 glish ministers; and, considering her sis- 
 ter's situation, they seemed to have some 
 ground for their suspicion ; wherefore 
 they despatched a gentleman to PariSy 
 where the Prince then was, who had in- 
 structions to insist that Mrs. Walkenshaw
 
 206 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 should be removed to a convent for a 
 certain term ; but her gallant absolutely 
 refused to comply with this demand ; 
 and although Mr. M'Namara, the gen- 
 tleman who was sent to him, who has 
 a natural eloquence, and an excellent 
 understanding, urged the most cogent 
 reasons, and used all the arts of per- 
 suasion to induce him to part with his 
 mistress, and even proceeded so far as 
 to assure him, according to his instruc- 
 tions, that an immediate interruption of 
 all correspondence with his most power- 
 ful friends in England, and in short 
 that the ruin of his interest, which was 
 now daily increasing, would be the in- 
 fallible consequence of his refusal ; yet 
 he continued inflexible, and all M'Na- 
 mara's intreaties and remonstrances were
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 207 
 
 ineffectual. M'Namara staid in Paris 
 some days beyond the time prescribed 
 him, endeavouring to reason the Prince 
 into a better temper; but finding him 
 obstinately persevere in his first answer, 
 he took his leave with concern and in- 
 dignation, saying, as he passed out, 
 " what has your family done. Sir, thus 
 to draw down the vengeance of Heaven 
 on every branch of it through so many 
 ages ?'* It is worthy of remark, that in 
 all the conferences which M*Namara had 
 with the Prince on this occasion, the latter 
 declared, that it was not a violent pas- 
 sion, or indeed any particular regard*. 
 
 * I believe he spoke truth when he declared he 
 had no esteem for his northern mistress, although 
 she has been his companion for so many years. She 
 had no elegance of manners : and as they had both
 
 208 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 which attached him to Mrs. Walkenshaw, 
 and that he could see her removed from 
 him without any concern ; but he would 
 not receive directions in respect to his 
 private conduct from any man alive. 
 When M'Namara returned to London, 
 and reported the Prince's answer to the 
 gentlemen* who had employed him, they 
 
 contracted an odious habit of drinking, so they ex- 
 posed themselves very frequently, not only to their 
 own family, but to all their neighbours. They often 
 quarreled and sometimes fought : they were some 
 of these drunken scenes which, probably, occasioned 
 the report of his madness. 
 
 * These were all men of fortune and distinction, 
 and many of them persons of the first quality, who 
 
 attached themselves to as to a person who, 
 
 they imagined, might be made the instrument of 
 saving their country. They were sensible, that by 
 Walpole's administration tlie English government 
 was become a system of corruption, and that Wal- 
 pole's successors, who pursued his plan without any 
 of his abilities, had reduced us to such a deplorable
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 209 
 
 were astonished and confounded. How- 
 ever, they soon resolved on the measures 
 which they were to pursue for the future, 
 and determined no longer to serve a man 
 who could not be persuaded to serve 
 himself, and chose rather to endanger 
 the lives of his best and most faithful 
 friends, than part with an harlot, whom, 
 as he often declared, he neither loved 
 nor esteemed. If ever that old adage 
 Quos Jupiter vult perdere^ kc. could be 
 properly applied to any person, whom 
 could it so well fit as the gentleman of 
 whom I have been speaking? for it is 
 
 situation, that our commercial interest was sinking, 
 our colonies in danger of being lost, and Great 
 Britain, which, if her powers were properly ex- 
 erted, was able to give laws to other nations, was 
 become the contempt of all Europe. 
 
 As they were afterwards in Mr. Pitt's administratioiu 
 
 P
 
 210 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 difficult by any other means to account 
 for such a sudden infatuation. * He was, 
 indeed, soon afterwards made sensible 
 of his misconduct, when it was too late 
 to repair it : for from this era may truly 
 be dated the ruin of his cause ; which, 
 for the future, can only subsist in the 
 
 * He was soon made acquainted with the defection 
 which immediately followed upon the report of his 
 answer. He endeavoured to excuse himself by 
 blaming the gentleman who had been sent to him j 
 he pretended the message had not been properly de- 
 livered, that he had been treated rudely and inso- 
 lently, &c. But this was not the case. Mr. M'Na- 
 mara addressed him in the most respectful manner, 
 and though he spoke firmly, as he knew the conse- 
 quence of the Prince's refusal, yet he could not have 
 treated him with more deference if he had been on 
 the throne. The Prince's accusation of M'Namara 
 was very unjust, as well as ungrateful, for M'Na- 
 mara had been often with him, and had served him 
 with great zeal and fidelity on many important oc- 
 casions, both at home and abroad.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 211 
 
 N n ing congregations, which are ge- 
 nerally formed of the meanest people, 
 from whom no danger to the present 
 government need ever be apprehended. 
 Before I close this article, I must ob- 
 serve, that during this transaction, my 
 Lord M was at Paris in the 
 
 quality of Envoy from the K of 
 
 P 5 M'Namara had directions to 
 
 acquaint him with his commission : my 
 Lord M . not in the least doubt- 
 ing the Prince's compliance with the re- 
 quest of his friends in England, deter- 
 mined to quit the K of P 's ser- 
 vice as soon as his embassy was finished, 
 and go into the Prince's family. This 
 would have been a very fortunate cir- 
 cumstance to the Prince on all accounts, 
 but more especially as nothing could be 
 
 p 2
 
 212 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 more agreeable to all those persons of 
 figure and distinction, who were at that 
 time so deeply engaged in his cause ; 
 for there was not one of all that number 
 who would not have reposed an entire 
 confidence in the honour and discretion 
 
 of my Lord M . But how was 
 
 this gentleman amazed, when he per- 
 ceived the Prince's obstinacy and impru- 
 dence? who was resolved, by a strange 
 fatality, to alienate the affections of his 
 best friends, and put an absolute barrier 
 to all his own hopes. From this time 
 
 my Lord M would never concern 
 
 himself in this cause ; but prudently 
 embraced the opportunity, through the 
 
 K of P 's interest, of reconciling 
 
 himself to the English government. 
 Since I wrote this article, I have met
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 213 
 
 with a pamphlet lately published (1762) 
 in French, entitled, Testament Politique 
 du Marechal Duo de Belleisle, The 
 author of this work is said to be the 
 present writer of the Brussels Gazette : 
 he pretends to know, that when the 
 French had resolved on the expedition 
 against Minorca, the command of their 
 troops was offered to Prince Charles, 
 which he refused, complaining of his 
 imprisonment in the Castle of Vincennes, 
 et finit par me dire (says Mr. Belleisle) 
 que les Anglois lui rendroient justice, 
 s'ils le jugeoient a propos ; mais qu*il ne 
 vouloit plus ^tre leur epouvantail, I can 
 scarce believe the command of this 
 expedition was ever offered to Prince 
 Charles; but if it were, I can easily be- 
 lieve that his answer was such as this
 
 214 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 author has reported; for he had often 
 declared to his friends, after the ill treat- 
 ment which he had received from the 
 Court of France, that he never would 
 accept of any offers which that court 
 might hereafter make him, which never 
 had any real intention to serve him, but 
 only to use him occasionally as their in- 
 strument, and to sacrifice him to their 
 own interest. He knew enough of the 
 history of his family to have learnt this 
 truth, and he had on two or three oc- 
 casions experienced it in himself. 
 
 SOMNIUM ACADEMICI ALTERUM. Mihi 
 
 denuo sit propitia Mnemosyne animum 
 revocanti ad earum rerum memoriam, 
 quibus ipse interfui, quum nocte hesternd 
 nescio quomodo, peregr^ abirem, et in
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 215 
 
 lis errarem regionibus, quae sola Mor- 
 phei ditione gubernantur : Ubi Deus ille 
 ita apt^ formas personasque omnes sibi 
 induit, aliisque imponit, uti re vera eos 
 esse, qui simulantur, Deos atque homines 
 putemus. Et mehercule baud fer^ quis- 
 quam mortalium aut immortalium, prae- 
 ter Pseudo-Amphytrionem et Sosiam 
 suum, histrioniam uspiam gentium visus 
 est exquisitius facere. Vellem etiam 
 mihi propitias esse Musas et Apollinem, 
 non multum aut nihil omnino, quod poeta- 
 rum celeberrimorum ritu, iis molestus 
 essem, et centum ora linguasque aut ali- 
 quid magnum postularem. Sed utinam 
 sic agerem, ut mihi potestatem Musae 
 concedant transformandi ineptos quos- 
 dam scriptores aliosque viros improbos 
 et academiae nostras inimicissimos, in
 
 216 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 picas aut porcos ; utque sagittifer ille 
 ****** certa spicula aut tela acutiora 
 ex pharetra aut armamentario suo de- 
 prompta mihi donet, quo aliquando ar- 
 ceam a sedibus hisce ornatissimis et li- 
 bertatis aede magnam istam et perjuram 
 delatorum et ardelionum nationem. Quod 
 ad hodiernam disputationem attinet, satis 
 mihi cautum fuisse spero, quod Latiali 
 sermone usus sum, quem quidem neque- 
 unt exponere, fortasse ne quidem legere 
 * Blacones isti, qui optimatibus nostris 
 
 * Blacokes apud Anglos sunt infames delatoreSj 
 gigantum filii ; quos natura malevolos spes pra?mii 
 induxit in summum scelus : qui quum castos et in- 
 tegerrimos viros accusare soleant, omnia confingunt, 
 et non modo perjuria sua vendunt, verumetiam alios 
 impellunt ad pejerandum. Nomen sumunt a Blacow 
 quodam sacerdote, qui ob nefarias suas delationes 
 donatus est canonicatu Vindsoriensi a regni praefecto 
 D. de N. Quanta heu, heu, illo tempore fuerunt sce- 
 lenun praemia !
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 217 
 
 se magnified jactant, ostentantque, quos- 
 que scio jam pollicituros se quam saga- 
 cissim^ odorari posse quid et ipse sen- 
 tiam, et tota haec fabula velit. 
 
 QuuM JuNii Calendis MDCCLX 
 iter ad provinciam Cantii facerem et 
 jam advesperasceret, in diversorio celebri 
 et lauto decrevi requiescere. Ibi in tres 
 incidi ex familiaribus meis, viros nobiles, 
 eruditos, facetos ; qui omni sua comitate 
 me complexi, ad coenam quam apparari 
 jusserant, quam humanissim^ invitabant. 
 Inter coenandum me evocavit rusticus 
 quidam facie rubicunda, latis humeris, 
 cruribus ocreatis, et russeis vestibus in- 
 dutus, qui dexteram meam prehendens 
 digito auriculari aptavit ferreum annu- 
 lum, inquiens, In hoc salus : dumque 
 rogo. Quid istuc verbi est? fugit, evanuit.
 
 218 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 Redeo ad coenam narro omnia: vident 
 amici, requiruntque, ut annulum inspi- 
 ciant, quern quum ter et amplius de di- 
 gito conatus sum detrahere, neque id 
 summa vi efficere potui, subita superstitio 
 mentem meam occupavit, quasi ab h6c 
 conatu quodam numine repulsus essem. 
 Atque hoc prodigio ita commoveor (quod 
 ver6 adjuvit hilaritatem comitum meo- 
 rum) ut ne verbum quidem adjicere pos- 
 sem, et nescio quid triste expectarem. 
 Itaque, cum opportunum erat tempus, 
 cubitum discessi, et sive ex moestitia sive 
 ex lassitudine arctius dormivi, neque pos- 
 tero die nisi post horam nonam exper- 
 rectus sum. Interea autem que pericula 
 subii ! quae maria transii ! quas regiones 
 peragravi ! quos homines, quos deos adii, 
 cognovi! Vix enim obrepserat somnus,
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 219 
 
 quum in mari Atlantico navigabam velis 
 plenissimis. Puppis erat ingens, valida, 
 deaurata, tarn pedestribus quam navalibus 
 copiis instructa. Miratus sortem meam 
 dum ex nautis quaerere coepi, cujus esset 
 navigium, et quo tenderet, in me torv^ 
 intuens praefectus navis peregrina veste 
 indutum, rogavit. Qui, et unde ipse 
 essem, et cujus ope, et quo animo navem 
 conscenderem omnino nullo diploraate 
 munitus. Cumque obstupui, nee quid 
 responderem, inveni, me quasi curiosum 
 speculatorem cujus capite navis deberet 
 lustrari, in mare ejici jussit. lUico me 
 aggrediuntur tres quatuorve ex nautis 
 robustioribus, et frustra clamantem me 
 innoxium esse nimis inhumaniter ejiciunt. 
 At qua mira jam in mari sunt facta cum 
 meo magno commodo: mihi adfuit ca-
 
 220 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 denti ipse Triton, meque in vicinia mor- 
 tis qu^m humanissim^ accepit, et in curru 
 suo, afFabre quidem facto, ea concha 
 splendidissima, coUocavit. Currum tra- 
 hebant equi marini, quorum vim ac cele- 
 ritatem praecipu^ sum admiratus : nabant 
 enim seu volitabant aura ocyus. Neque 
 vero Jonas in cetis ventre latitans, neque 
 Arion delphino insidens, aut Europa tauri 
 dorso tutius navigabant. Interna me 
 docuit Triton de ferrei annuli virtute et 
 potentia, deinde quo mei causa dirigeret 
 iter ad insulam scilicet Neptuno sacram 
 in primis, nobile solum, et cui me credere 
 possem, si literarum colerem studia, aut 
 siquid negotiationis genus mihi placeret. 
 Dum benignitati Dei marini gratias ago, 
 ad littus deferimur. Protinus ego in 
 terram desilio, et Triton ter et amplius
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 221 
 
 mihi vale dicens in mare revertitur. Ut 
 me adspexerunt rustici quidam in littore 
 spatiantes, barbaro suo more cuncti pro- 
 currunt, mea omnia, quasi certissimam 
 praedam sibi proponentes. Dumque in 
 me impetum facere conantur, subito 
 prop^ astant immobiles deinde, tanquam 
 terrore panico concitati, terga vertunt, 
 et aufugiunt. Hand procul vidi mediocre 
 diversorium, ubi nautse et piscatores totos 
 dies potabant. Hie cibo meroque post- 
 quam corpus curavi, curru quadrigarum 
 conductitio vectus sum ad urbem, quam 
 Argentariam vocant, insulae caput. Ut 
 urbem intravi, cernere erat ad dextram 
 templum magnificentissimum, ornatissi- 
 mum. E curru descendi curiosus spec- 
 tator, et servis equisque praemissis ad 
 templi porticum accessi. In eo placid^
 
 222 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 ambulantem aspicio senem quendam 
 vultu laeto et florido, purpurea veste 
 indutum. Saluto hominem quasi peregre 
 adveniens, sciscitorque cujus haec sit 
 asdes splendidissima, et cui Deo dicata. 
 O hospes, inquit purpuratus, haec est 
 aedes Divi Augusti Gondiberti, qui 
 nuper in coelum abiit. Si quaeris, Quid 
 ille hominis fuerit, aut quid meritus sit, 
 ut tanti habitet, en ejus effigiem. Haec 
 locutus sinistram prehendit, meque in 
 templum duxit, ubi in medio positam 
 statuam Gondiberti inauratam vidi, 
 cujus in basi hoc elogium erat incisum : 
 
 Sacrum. Esto. 
 
 Divo. Augusto. Gondiberto. Secundo. 
 
 Argentariae. Regi. Sapientissimo. 
 
 Imperatori. Fortissimo. Invictissimo. Clementissimo. 
 
 Germaiiico. Asiatico. Africano. Americano. 
 
 Pio. Facili. Jucundo. Magnanimo.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 223 
 
 Cultori. Optimanim. Artium. Assiduo. 
 
 Patrono. Literatorum. Omnium. Munificentissimo. 
 
 Omnibus. Amicissimo. 
 
 Omnibus. Dilectissimo. 
 
 Patriae, et. Libertatis. Parenti. 
 
 Et. Seculi. Sui. Decori. et. Ornamento. 
 
 Jamque paratus et ipse eram Gondi- 
 BERTi memoriam venerari, cum in aedem 
 introiit Stoicus quidam calvus, gravis, 
 severus, virgulam divinam in manu ges- 
 tans ; qui in me intuens, Cave, inquit, 
 hospes, temere credas speciosae huic 
 inscriptioni. Divus sit, necne, defunc- 
 tus, san^ nescio : at cujusmodi fuerit 
 homo, prob^ scio, et faciam, ut tu scias. 
 Tunc virguld feriens statua3 basin, de 
 improviso immutatum est et evanuit 
 magnificum istud elogium, et hoc alterum 
 pro 60 est substitutum.
 
 224 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 Hie situs est, 
 
 Qui dictis et incessu semper patuit 
 
 Miles Gloriosus; 
 
 Sed rei milltaris scientiae aeque ac artium liberalium 
 
 Omnino omnium ignarus. 
 
 Nescitur quo malo fato, fuit elieu ! potentissimus ; 
 
 Sed injustus, superbus, sordidus, inhumanus. 
 
 Laudum cupidissimus 
 
 Se Laude summa dignum existimavit. 
 
 At vixit quaravis annos plus septuaginta, 
 
 Haud quidquam unquam fecit facinus laudabile. 
 
 Nemini cuiquam amatus 
 
 Neminem quemquam, prseter seipsum, amavit, 
 
 Ne quidcm liberos, aut nepotes. 
 
 Sexcenta millia auri pondo corrasit, 
 
 Non hostes, sed sues opprimendo, & spoliando. 
 
 Nam ardenti fuit avaritia, 
 
 Et auri usque ad furorem appetens; 
 
 Quod unum vigilans, somnians 
 
 Cogitabat, quaerebat, admirabatur, venerabatur. 
 
 Et mehercule si Midas rex fuisset, 
 
 Nunquam suum damnasset votum 
 
 Sed, sacculis inhians, laetus periisset 
 
 Aurum creando, 
 
 Paulo inferius hoc praeterea in eodem
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 225' 
 
 basi, sed literis majusculis inscriptum 
 notavi : 
 
 Qui veritatem amas, et quaeriS, 
 
 En tibi Elogium sane verisshnum \ 
 
 Tu vero, 
 
 Cui MiLiTi huic GLOKioso concessum est 
 
 Succedere, 
 
 Tui, et patriae causa sis ei quam dissimillimus !' 
 
 Teque memineris 
 
 Neque Deum esse, neque lupum, 
 
 Sed Hominem! 
 
 Iterum iterumque hoc epigramma oculis 
 intentis contemplatus sum, et vix mihi 
 persuasum est ita ea prorsus esse quse 
 vidi, legi, et relegi : usque adeo magica 
 haec transmutatio mihi admirationem 
 movit. Jamque circumspiciens quaere- 
 bam senem purpuratum, qui primum in 
 banc aedem me invitabat. Stoicus vero, 
 frustra, in quit, purpuratum quaeris. Ut 
 enim introii, ille se ex sede proripuit.
 
 22 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 conspectum meum veritus, et hujus vir- 
 gulae virtutem ; quae falsas historias, et 
 mendacia impudentiora levi tactu obli- 
 terat et abradit, et vanas esse, uti cernis, 
 omnes eas praedicationes, quae Gondi- 
 BERTUM nostrum in deorum numerum 
 retulere. 
 
 CONTINUATIO ET SERIES RERUM SIVE 
 FABULARUM SoMNIO AcADEMICI ANNEC- 
 
 TENDA. Quid autem isthuc, inquam, 
 obsecro, est negotii, aut cujusce modi 
 homo is est, qui me quam familiariter in 
 hoc fanum invitavit, quique, ut te con- 
 spicatus est, virgulam tuam divinam in 
 manu gestantem, repente aufugit. Iste, 
 ait Stoicus, vir est magni nominis. Sub 
 regno Gondiberti IP', regni fuit prse- 
 fectus et nisi a gubernaculis reipublica?
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 227 
 
 tandem dejectus fuisset, maximum me- 
 hercule non modo ab hostium vi, sed ab 
 universo naufragio nobis esset pericu- 
 lum. Haud dissimilis est ei Suecico 
 senatori et praefecto, quem in notis ad 
 Perill^e Epistolam penicillo tuo scit^ 
 pinxisti. Nunc vero, septuagenarius 
 quamvis, sortis suae impatiens, et vita 
 privata et quieta minimi contentus novas 
 res molitur, et qui patriae semper pessim^ 
 consuluit, nunc iterum per bonorum 
 omnium proscriptiones ad regni prsefec- 
 turam aspirat. Inter haec, quse de Ar- 
 gentariae statu me docebat Stoicus, in 
 templum introiit pontifex maximus pur- 
 pura et auro nitens, magna procerum 
 eoccineis vestibus indutorum comitante 
 caterva ; qui ut consed^re (iis enim om.- 
 nibus subsellia destinabantur) areara 
 
 q2
 
 228 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 templi et porticum implebant inferioris 
 ordinis cives. Ego invitatus a templi 
 custodibus inter hospites et peregrinos, 
 qui, ex more civitatis humanissime, ac- 
 cipiebantur, satis commode sedebam, 
 cumque, quid agendum esset, scisci- 
 tabar, in rostrum ascendit senex octo- 
 genarius, calvus, decrepitus, quem, ac- 
 clamante coetu, ita locutum fuisse ben^ 
 memini. Orationem hodie habiturus iis 
 baud dissimilis videor, qui quum longin- 
 quum iter facere cogitant, idque negotia 
 quaedam nee opinata de die in diem im- 
 pedierint, amicos et propinquos iterum 
 arcessere, iterum amplexari, et quibus 
 jam novo valedixerunt, iterum valedi- 
 cere solent. At vero in hunc locum me 
 invitum ascendisse fateor; quippe sentio 
 qu^m animi vires perinde atque corporis
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 229 
 
 me deficiant, et vereor ut eas, quas sus- 
 
 cepi partes implere, aut quippiam coetu 
 
 hoc illustrissimo dignum proferre possim. 
 
 Quid autem facerera ! mihi hoc mandavit 
 
 officium ita ut neque de- 
 
 precationi esset locus, neque eetatis ex- 
 
 cusatione liceret uti. Quamobrem vos 
 
 oro, ut extremo huic sermoni meo 
 
 veniam detis : Veniam a vobis pro laude 
 
 peto. Caetera quidem petenda sunt a 
 
 libero illo spiritu, qui in difficillimo meo 
 
 tempore semper mihi adfuit, et nunc 
 
 adest ; qui neque potentissimorum homi- 
 
 num gratiam quaerit, neque novam opti- 
 
 matum factionem colit, neque populi 
 
 furorem metuit, neque quid veri dicere 
 
 non audet pro patria, pro pro 
 
 salute communi causam dicturus. Cum 
 
 per annos plus quadraginta regni prae-
 
 230 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 fecti, sed homines iniquissimi banc civi- 
 tatem, banc Musarum domum, opprimere 
 sunt aggressi, quam exterminandam vel- 
 lent, earn hodie non modo salvam sed 
 florentem videmus : utque auspicatius 
 sermonem meum instituam, In ster- 
 num FLOREAT ! Cui vero fortunam nos- 
 tram, et hodiernam felicitatem debeamus, 
 neminem fugit. lUe enim princeps sere- 
 nissimus, atque idem hostis et victor 
 sequissimus, postquam christiano orbi pa- 
 cem dederat, nos et patriis juribus, et 
 perfecta libertate, et otio boc literato 
 voluit et jussit frui. Ecquis autem pu- 
 taret, ecquis non doleret repertos esse 
 ex incolis nostris, qui res prosperas et 
 fortunatum bunc reipublicae statum mi- 
 nimi possint pati? Nonne videtur an- 
 tiqua ea hujus insulae ferocitas et bar-
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 231 
 
 baries rediisse, et quorumdam civium 
 mores penitus imbuisse, qui bellum, 
 caedes et rapinas, concordise tranquilli- 
 tati, et saluti communi anteferendas essfe 
 censeant? A quo fonte derivata sint 
 hsec mala sub regno principis mitissimi 
 justissimique, quod quidem posteris quasi 
 monstri simile videbitur, Vos non 
 
 ignoratis. En enim quasi altera conju- 
 ratio Catilinaria! Sunt ex ipsis sena- 
 toribus, quos trahit ambitio, sunt quos 
 urget avarities, sunt quos impellit egestas, 
 omnes pessimo ingenio usos. Hi impri- 
 mis libertatem publicam, quse in rebus 
 omnibus moderationem servare debet, 
 esse asserunt quodcunque sibi (at sibi 
 solis) facere libeat. Hinc regis acta et 
 senatus consulta palam calumniantur, et 
 criminantur. Hinc imperitum vulgus et
 
 232 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 Argentariae faecem aut verborum prae- 
 stigiis capiunt, aut largitionibus corrum- 
 punt. Hinc impudentissim^ postulant 
 per oratorem suum, ut summa rerum et 
 negotiorum omuium potestas sibi suisque 
 tradatur, et nihil regi prseter nomen inane 
 maneat. Hinc denique antiquae et sem- 
 per venerandse gentis religioni, atque 
 (O infandum !) ipsi Deo maledicere 
 audent. Supervacaneum esset vos hor- 
 tari (quorum virtutes et prudentia ad- 
 hortationes minimi desiderant) ut ne- 
 quis vestrum huic factioni accedat, aut 
 cum hisce seditionis auctoribus amicitia 
 aut hospitio conjungatur: at mehercule 
 diligenter caveri oportet, ut nequis vir 
 bonus specie recti decipiatur ; quippe 
 adversarii nostri, dum res novas moliun- 
 tur, et unum hoc cogitant, quo modo
 
 OF mS OWN TIMES. 233 
 
 regem et rempublicam possint opprimere, 
 de fide et virtute sua gloriantur, seque 
 imprimis studere fingunt, ut populi liber- 
 tatem, et jura legesque nostras tueantur. 
 Vos autem, Juvenes praecipu^ 
 
 cautos esse velim, n^ adolescentia vestra, 
 quae minimi est suspicax, horum homi- 
 num fallaciis et simulationibus circum- 
 veniatur. Opto & spero, ut bonam earn 
 indoJem, integritatem et ingenium, quae 
 hodie hujus loci praefectis vos commend- 
 ant, in omni vita, inque negotiis cum do- 
 mesticis turn publicis semper obtineatis. 
 Sunt ex vobis qui in Senatum magnum 
 cooptentur; sunt qui fortasse sint pri- 
 mores regni: quae fortuna si vobis con- 
 tigerit, tum vero maxime dignitati et 
 existimationi vestrae consulere oportebit : 
 tum praeter^a omnibus constet eum vobis
 
 S834 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 insitum esse amorem patriae et modera- 
 tionem animi, ut neque mali' quaestfts 
 neque malae ambitionis causa vos reipub- 
 licae unquam defuturi sitis. Saep^ ego 
 miratus sum (ut ant^a dixi) ex popu- 
 laribus nostris inveniri, qui bellum ini- 
 quum quam pacem malunt honestissi- 
 mam, at mehercule multo magis miror et 
 indignor homines hosce gloriosos eives 
 esse ignavissimos et luxu diffluentes, qui 
 baud unquam rebus suis consulunt, quo 
 scilicet omnia turbent et pessim^ de re- 
 publica mereantur, nisi inter coenandum 
 et potandum. Quid vero si in eorum 
 mores et animum propius inspiceres ? 
 nonne statim exclamares, Quam turpe 
 foedus ! quam perversa conjunctio ! quam 
 discors concordia! Siquidem ex hujus 
 factionis principibus quam vis neminem
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 235 
 
 quemquam cognoveris, quin is ceteros 
 omnes, socios scilicet suos et convivas 
 quotidianos prorsus contemnat et odio 
 habeat ; quodcunque tamen quis sentiat 
 contra rempublicam, idem omnes sen- 
 tiunt. Huic conventui factioso sese so- 
 cium et consiliarium addidit Argentarias 
 prtetor vir sordidissimus. Is, ut non 
 nullius pretii inter suos habeatur, totius 
 Senatus auctoritatem, qui uno ore bonis 
 quibusdam civibus ob merita in rempub- 
 licam gratias agendas esse decreverat, in 
 curia negotiatorum, qua est impudentia, 
 voce sua damnare baud dubitavit. O 
 quam fortunata esset respublica si pauci 
 ex sceleratissimis hisce senatoribus aliquc> 
 in exteras regiones possent extrudi ! Sed, 
 quia libertatem semper in ore habent, 
 quo machinationes suas et spem domina-
 
 236 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 tionis occultius celare queant, et urbanae 
 plebis clamoribus, et complurium civium, 
 qui eorum consiliis favent, sententiis 
 muniti jus publicum violari quererentur, 
 siquid gravius de flagitiis suis esset ani- 
 madvertendum, idcirco rex mitissimus 
 injurias maximas & contumelias maluit 
 
 "r\o4*| ^ 4ft W W ^ W 
 
 Quae ultra mihi acciderunt, dum apud 
 Argentariam commoror, non est hodie 
 tutus narrandi locus. Posthaec videro, 
 an ea satis commode possint dici. 
 
 Oblitusque meorum, obliviscendus 
 ET iLLis, is the sincere desire of many 
 melancholy heads which are to be found 
 in the British dominions; and there- 
 fore I have often wished, that when we 
 reformed from popery a few convents
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES, 237 
 
 had been exempted from the general 
 pillage, in which men of severe morals, 
 or of a melancholy cast and turn of mind, 
 might have found a retreat. But I have 
 observed, what is perhaps peculiar to this 
 island, that there are men wholly free 
 from the spleen, or a lowness of spirits, 
 in good health and good circumstances, 
 and only actuated by some whimsical 
 considerations, seek a retreat where they 
 may forget their friends and relations, 
 and be forgotten by them. About the 
 year 1706, I knew one Mr. Howe, a 
 sensible well-natured man, possessed of 
 an estate of 700/. or 800/. per annum: he 
 married a young lady of a good family in 
 the west of England, her maiden name 
 was Mallet ; she was agreeable in her 
 person and manners, and proved a very 
 good wife. Seven or eight years after
 
 238 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 they had been married, he rose one 
 morning very early, and told his wife 
 he was obliged to go to the Tower to 
 transact some particular business : the 
 same day, at noon, his wife received a 
 note from him, in which he informed 
 her that he was under a necessity of 
 going to Holland, and should probably 
 be absent three weeks or a month. He 
 was absent from her seventeen years, 
 during which time she neither heard 
 from him, or of him. The evening be- 
 fore he returned, whilst she was at sup- 
 per, and with her some of her friends 
 and relations, particularly one Dr. Rose *, 
 a physician, who had married her sister, 
 
 I was very well acquainted with Dr. Rose ; he 
 was of a French family. I often met him at King's 
 Coffee-house, near Golden-square, and he frequently 
 entertained me with this remarkable story.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 239 
 
 a billet, without any name subscribed, 
 was delivered to her, in which the writer 
 requested the favour of her to give him 
 a meeting the next evening in the Bird- 
 cage Walk, in St. James's Park. When 
 she had read her billet, she tossed it to Dr. 
 Rose, and laughing, " You see, brother,'* 
 said she, " as old as I am, I have got a 
 gallant." Rose, who perused the note 
 with more attention, declared it to be 
 Mr. Howe's hand- writing : this surprised 
 all the company, and so much affected 
 Mrs. Howe, that she fainted away; 
 however, she soon recovered, when it 
 was agreed that Dr. Rose and his wife, 
 with the other gentlemen and ladies who 
 were then at supper, should attend Mrs. 
 Howe the next evening to the Bird-cage 
 Walk : they had not been there more
 
 240 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 than five or six minutes, when Mr. Howe 
 came to them, and after saluting his 
 friends, and embracing his wife, walked 
 home with her, and they lived together 
 in great harmony from that time to the 
 day of his death. But the most curious 
 part of my tale remains to be related. 
 * When Howe left his wife, they lived 
 in a house in Jermyn-street, near St. 
 James's church j he went no farther than 
 to a little street in Westminster, where 
 he took a room, for which he paid five 
 or six shillings a week, and changing his 
 
 * London is the only place in all Europe where 
 a man can find a secure retreat, or remain, if he 
 pleases, many years unknown. If he pays constantly 
 for his lodging, for his provisions, and for what- 
 soever else he wants, nobody will ask a question 
 concerning him, or inquire whence he comes, whi- 
 ther he goes, &c.
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 241 
 
 name, and disguising himself by wearing 
 a black wig (for he was a fair man), he 
 remained in this habitation during the 
 whole time of his absence. He had had 
 two children by his wife when he de- 
 parted from her, who were both living 
 at that time : but they both died young 
 in a few years after. However, during 
 their lives, the second or third year after 
 their father disappeared, Mrs. Howe was 
 obliged to apply for an act of parlia- 
 ment to procure a proper settlement of 
 her husband's estate, and a provision for 
 herself out of it during his absence, as 
 it was uncertain whether he was alive 
 or dead: this act he suffered to be 
 solicited and passed, and enjoyed the 
 pleasure of reading the progress of it in 
 the votes, in a little coffee-house, near
 
 243 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 his lodging, which he frequented. Upon 
 his quitting his house and family in the 
 manner I have mentioned, Mrs. Howe 
 at first imagined, as she could not con- 
 ceive any other cause for such an abrupt 
 elopement, that he had contracted a large 
 debt unknown to her, and by that means 
 involved himself in difficulties which he 
 could not easily surmount ; and for some 
 days she lived in continual apprehensions 
 of demands from creditors, of seizures, 
 executions, &;c. But nothing of this 
 kind happened ; on the contrary, he did 
 not only leave his estate quite free and 
 unencumbered, but he paid the bills of 
 every tradesman with whom he had any 
 dealings; and upon examining his papers, 
 in due time after he was gone, proper 
 receipts and discharges were found from
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 243 
 
 all persons, whether tradesmen or others, 
 with whom he had any manner of trans- 
 actions or money concerns. Mrs. Howe, 
 after the death of her children, thought 
 proper to lessen her family of servants, 
 and the expenses of her housekeeping ; 
 and therefore removed from her house 
 in Jermyn-street to a little house in 
 Brewer-street, near Golden-square. Just 
 over against her lived one Salt *, a corn- 
 chandler. About ten years after Howe's 
 abdication, he contrived to make an ac- 
 quaintance with Salt, and was at length 
 in such a degree of intimacy with him, 
 that he usually dined with Salt once or 
 
 I knew SalTj whom I often met at a coffee- 
 house called King's Coffee-house, near Golden- 
 square. He related to me the particulars which I 
 have here mentioned, and many others, which have 
 escaped my memory.
 
 244 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 twice a week. From the room in which 
 they eat, it was not difficult to look into 
 Mrs. Howe's dining-room, where she ge- 
 nerally sate and received her conipany ; 
 and Salt, who believed Howe to be a 
 bachelor, frequently recommended his 
 own wife to him as a suitable match. 
 During the last seven years of this gen- 
 tleman's absence, he went every Sunday 
 to St. James's church, and used to sit in 
 Mr. Salt's seat, where he had a view of 
 his wife, but could not easily be seen by 
 her. After he returned home, he never 
 would confess, even to his most intimate 
 friends, what was the real cause of such 
 a singular conduct; apparently, there 
 was none : but whatever it was, he was 
 certainly ashamed to own it. Dr. Rose 
 has often said to me, that he believed
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 245 
 
 his brother Howe* would never have re- 
 turned to his wife, if the money which 
 he took with him, which was supposed to 
 have been 1000/. or 2000/. had not been 
 all spent : and he must have been a good 
 economist, and frugal in his manner of 
 living, otherwise his money would scarce 
 have held out ; for I imagine he had his 
 whole fortune by him, I mean what he 
 carried away with him in money or bank 
 bills, and daily took out of his bag, like 
 the Spaniard in Gil Blas, what was 
 sufficient for his expenses. 
 
 Reverendo de grege porcum is an 
 expression used by Dr. John Burton, 
 
 * And yet I have seen him after his return address- 
 ing his wife in the language of a young bridegroom. 
 And I have been assured by some of his most intimate 
 friends, that he treated her during the rest of their 
 Jives with the greatest kindness and affection.
 
 246 DR. KINGS ANECDOTES 
 
 speaking of himself in a thing which 
 he calls his Iter Sussexiense. This 
 is borrowed, as we all know, from 
 the Epicuri de grege porcum of Ho- 
 race, which has been censured by some 
 critics as a coarse expression, and not 
 agreeable to the usual politeness of the 
 Roman poet; but it certainly ought to 
 be censured with some severity, as ap- 
 plied by this reverend divine to himself 
 and the whole body of the clergy ; for 
 how are we to translate it, one of the 
 reverend herd of swine? or, in a more 
 limited manner, one of those clergymen 
 ivho are hogs ? This is such an indecent, 
 or rather such an infamous appellation, 
 that I scarce believe the most fiery sec- 
 tarist among us, or the greatest enemy 
 to prelacy and the Church of England, 
 would dare to throw out ; and there
 
 OF HIS OWN TIMES. 247 
 
 was a time when an author would have 
 been degraded and expelled the order 
 on which he had cast such an injurious 
 reflection. It is no alleviation of this 
 man*s fault that he treats himself with 
 the same freedom with which he treats 
 his brethren : he best knows his own in- 
 clinations and the qualities both of his 
 body and mind ; and whether they are 
 properly designed by this metaphorical 
 expression, which he has adopted from 
 the Roman satirist, he is certainly the 
 best judge. But may we not, therefore, 
 without offence, or the breach of good 
 manners, give him the name which he 
 himself has assumed? and when he is 
 instructing and admonishing the univer- 
 sity (for all his sermons are in that strain), 
 would it be any impropriety to judge him 
 out of his own mouth, and apply to him
 
 248 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 the old adage, sus Minervam? With 
 an head full of Latin and Greek, Bur- 
 ton uses both these languages with as 
 little taste and judgment as a school-boy. 
 
 Although I have been often pre- 
 vailed on to write * a Latin epitaph, and 
 have adhered, according to the best of 
 my knowledge or information, to the 
 truth in these panegyrical characters 
 (for de mortuis Jiil nisi bonum, however it 
 may be condemned in history, has been 
 an allowed maxim in all monumental 
 
 * I promised Nash, a few years before he died, 
 that if I survived him, I would write his epitaph, 
 I performed my promise, and in my description 
 of this extraordinary phenomenon, I think I have 
 written nothing but the truth ; one thing I omitted, 
 which I did not reflect on until after the epitaph 
 was printed, that a statue had been erected to him 
 whilst he was living ; and this great honour had 
 been conferred on him with more justice than to 
 any other of his contemporaries or brother kings.
 
 OF HIS OWN 'IIMES. 249 
 
 inscriptions in these latter ages); yet 
 this is a task which I have always very 
 unwillingly undertaken. I could wish 
 we had not departed from the simplicity 
 of the old Roman inscriptions; for as our 
 modern epitaphs consist generally of a 
 string of fulsome praises, bestowed equally 
 on the best and the worst, so they are 
 generally disregarded, and if they are 
 ever read, are read for the sake of the 
 composition only. The dean and pre- 
 bendaries of Westminster sell the sacred 
 ground to any persons who think proper 
 to purchase it ; no objection is made to 
 the quality or character of those to whom 
 a monument is to be erected under this 
 holy roof: the peer and the player, the 
 chaste and the unchaste, are here depo- 
 sited without distinction. But if you 
 examine their characters, as those are
 
 260 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES 
 
 here engraven on the monumental mar- 
 ble, you will not find one person amongst 
 them all, who, when living, had not been 
 endowed with the most eminent qualities 
 
 both of body and mind. General 
 
 wlio rose to his high post by such arts as 
 are a disgrace to human nature, appears 
 in Westminster Abbey to have possessed 
 as great talents and as many virtues as 
 Scirio Africanus. I have been often 
 very undeservedly abused, and crimes 
 have been im.puted to me, which, I thank 
 God, my honest soul abhors : on the 
 otiier hand, such praises have been fre- 
 quently bestowed on me as I am .con- 
 scious to myself I do not merit ; and I 
 have on many occasions received an ap- 
 ])lause to whicli, I think, I was not en- 
 titled. Laudahir ah his, culpatur ah illisy 
 Mill probably be my fate during my life:
 
 OF HIS 0\VT4 TIMES. 251 
 
 however, I would willingly, if I had 
 power, after my death, prevent the eulo- 
 gies of my friends, as well as the outrage 
 of my enemies ; and therefore 1 oiFer 
 both to one and the other the following 
 epitapli or inscription : 
 
 Fui 
 GuiLiELMus King, LL. D. 
 Ab anno MDCCXIX ad annum MDCCLX 
 Aula; B. M. V. in Academia Oxon. Praefectus. 
 Literis humanioribus a puero deditus, 
 Fias usque ad supremum vitfe diem colui. 
 Neque vitiis carui, neque virtutibus, 
 Tmprudens et improvidus, comis et benevolus ; 
 Saepe eequo iracuudior, 
 Haud unquam, ut essem implacabilis, 
 V luxuria pariter ac avaritiu 
 (Quam non tarn vitlum, 
 Quam mentis insanitatem esse dnxi) 
 Prorsus abhorrens. 
 Gives, hospites, peregrinos 
 Omnino liberalitcr accepi; 
 Ipse et cibi -ibstinpntior, ct vini abstinentissimus. 
 Cum magnis vi\i, cum plcbciio, cum oniiiibu.^, 
 Ut homines noscerem, ut meipsum imprimis :
 
 252 DR. KING'S ANECDOTES. 
 
 N6q\ie> eheu, novi ! 
 
 Per^nultos habui amicos. 
 
 At veros, stabiles, gratos 
 
 (Quae fortasse est gentis culpa) 
 
 Perpaucissimos. 
 
 Plures habui inimicos. 
 
 Seel invidos, sed improbos, sed inhiimanos : 
 
 Quorum nullis tamen injuriis 
 
 Perinde commotus fui, 
 
 Qu^m deliquiis meis. 
 
 Summam, quam adeptus sum, senectutem 
 
 Neque optavi, neque accusavi, 
 
 Vitae incommoda neque immoderate ferens, 
 
 Neque commodis nimiiim contentus : 
 
 Mortem neque contempsi, 
 
 Neque metui. 
 
 Deus Optime, 
 
 Qui hunc orbem et humanas res curas, 
 
 INfiserere animse meae ! 
 
 THE END. 
 
 ' .!> 
 
 I 
 
 UMKI) BY 1. DAVISON, WHITEF|kUKS. 
 
 LONDON 
 
 i^HITCFP 
 
 nrr. t..tbt>a7^,,^,,
 
 Univefsity ot California, Los Angeles 
 
 L 006 175 377 8