UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA AT LOS ANGELES \\ EDINBURGH FUGITIVE PIECES. ^Tbe Mu/e's labour then fuccefs Jball crown, When Folly feels her laugh > and Vice her froivrt* E D IN B URGE: PRINTED FOR WILLIAM CREECH; .AND T. CADELL, LONDON. M.DCC.XCI. PREFACE. THERE has hitherto been no afylum for Fugitive Pieces, or Occafional EiTays, in Scot- land, although many fuch have been made in, England. It is thought that a Collection might be furnifhed from this country, which would prove both enter taining and ufeful j and the Editor, impreffed with this idea, has ventured to give the plan a beginning. The periodical publications give a tranfient exiflence to many papers that often deferve a better fate ; and a collection of the prefent nature, while it pre- ferves, in part, a view of the manners, opi- nions, and tafle of the times as they rife, may alfo ferve to encourage many to write oc- cafional papers, who are either too indolent or unambitious to appear formally as authors. The Editor, by this collection, means to preferve fuch productions, either in profe or yerfe, as may occasionally appear and deferve notice, 445303 notice, and which do not belong to any other regular collection ; and, if it meets with en- couragement, it will be continued from time to time by additional volumes. He only begins a few years back, from the year 1782, with fuch fugitive pieces as he has had occafion to fee publifhed ; but will gladly receive the contributions of thofe who poflefs original papers or poems of a moderate length, that have not been printed. Explanatory Notes and Obfervations will be given, where necelfary, as far as the Editor knows, or could obtain information j and the collection will embrace every variety of fub- jecl:, of Scottifh production, whether ferious or humorous, poetical or profe, if of a delicate nature, and ufeful tendency. The letters E. C. mean Edinburgh Courant ; C. M. Caledonian Mercury ; E. G. Edinburgh Gazette. In thefe papers moft of the pieces contained in this volume originally appeared ; and many of them were afterwards copied into various periodical publications in Britain and Ireland. CONTENTS. CONTENTS. Page 1. RESOLUTIONS of the Citizens of Edinburgh, on the change of Miniflry, when Lord North retired, 5 2. A debate on the loyal addrefs propofed to be made on. occafion of a change of men and meafures, Ii 3. Advertifement of An univerfal warehoufe-for all forti of goods, 1J 4. Cato Cenfor's letters, 35 5. Cafualicies during a week, 45 6. The Jezebel Club, 48 7. Resolutions occasioned by the propofal for killing the dogs, in the fcarcity of provifion in 1783, 5$ 8. Verfcs by a penitent proftitute, 59 9. Letters containing a comparative view of Edinburgh in the years 1763 and 1783 refpe&ing the modes of living trade manners, &c. 6j jo. The letters of Horatius on the foregoing comparifon, 9^ 11. A comparifon fimilar to that of Edinburgh, from a country parifli, loj 12. A comparifon of the Britifli nation in 1763 and 1783, 107 13. Men are in every refpecT: like books, III 14. On the character and tendency of Roufleau's writings, with a prophecy, lit 15. Two letters from Conftantia Phillips, at the age of forty, to Lord Chefteriield, on female education, 131 16. On indelicacy, in converfation before Ladies, 141 17. A letter occafioned by a fentiment of Lord Kames, on the obfervance of Sunday, by Pafcal, 14$ 18. An anfwer to the above, containing an account of a Sunday parted in Weftmoreland, by Eufcbius, 145 19. A reply to the above, by Pafcal, 159 20. Another letter on the fame fubjecljbyPhilo-Sabbaticus, 163 31. A letter refpecting the fituation of the fchoolmaflers of Scotland, 168 22. A poetical epiftle, on Mrs Siddons's firfl appearance on the Edinburgh theatre, 171 23. On fingular fafhions in drefs, 175 24. Verfes to Dr Beattie, the author of the Minftrel, l8r 15. Verfes to the author of the Man of Feeling, l8fc 26. A receipt for happinefs, 183 27. Verfes written on a window, 184 a8. vi CONTENTS. 58. Return to a card, on the firft of April, i8y fljju Abridgement of a fermon on Man It lorn to troullt, 185 50. Genteel ceconomy, 1 86 31. On a letter by a clergyman refpe&ing the American loyalifts, 187 32. On the tax on bachelors, 190 33. A letter from Afiaticus, defcrfbing himfelf and the woman he would with to marry, 193 34. Reflections on the cafe of a young woman who took poifon in confequence of a difappointment in mar- riage, 197 35. Advertifement of malquerade drefles, aoi 36. The letters of Belzebub, on modern education, 206 25* 37. A letter on female fedu&ion, 253 3S?. A ietter from Peter Peafcod, ctmtrafting the manners of the town with thofe of the country, -255 39. Account of the eraordinary duel of Capt. Wildair and Mr Manly, 259 40. An account of phyfical phenomena in Scotland fince 1782, 268 41. A prologue on Stewart Nkolfon's firft appearance on the Hage at Edinburgh, 376 4%. Verfes on a Captain of Fcncibles leaving his company on their march, and going into a hackney coach, 27.7 43. Verfes to the author of the Eflay on Nothing, 278 44. A Critique on Logan's Ode to Women, 279 45. On Mr Henderfon in the character of Hamlet, 287 46. On the manner of finging the Scots fongs at the theatre, 290 47. On dancing, by Peter Pafpy. 294 48. A letter from Gamaliel Pickie, on his wife's fondnefs ibr dcfoltory reading, 298 49. Lines written by an Officer to a Lady whofe name was Whiting, 3 oo The Reader is requefted to correct the following Errata. with his pen. Page 47. paragraph 8. for The Academy for inftru&ing Dumb, read, inftrudling the dumb. 53. In the fifth line from the top for January 1782, read, January 1783. 75. In the tenth line from the top for 1782, read, 1781. 98. Letter II. line 9. for the of, read of the. 168. The paper beginning near the bottom of the page for the date, March 22. 1734, read, March 22. 1784. N. B. In the Letters beginning page 63. and ending 93. Jlating a comparative , June 17, 1782. " IN confequence of repeated advertifements and hand-bills, fetting forth, " That it would be proper " for the inhabitants of this city to prefent an AD- " DRESS TO HIS MAJESTY, on the late change of MEN and MEASURES," a number of re- fpectable Citizens, FRIENDS TO THE CIVIL, AND RELIGIOUS RlGHTS OF THE BRITISH CONSTITUTION, met, to confider of the proprie- ty FUGITIVE PIECES. ty of making fuch an addrefs at this time, when, after due deliberation, they came to the following refolutions : RESOLVED UNANIMOUSLY, I. That it is the opinion of this meeting, That an Addrefs on the late Change of MEN and MEASURES fhould be delayed till they are better knoivn ; as experience has frequently rendered pre- cipitate addreffes ridiculous. II. That it is the opinion of this meeting, that the Peace with Holland and America, the promifes of which contributed fo much to the CHANGE OF MEN, ARE MEASURES yet unaccomplifhed, and have been more unpromifing flnce the late Change than at any other period, till the recent fuccefles in the Eaft and Weft Indies. " III. That it is the opinion of this meeting, That the late fuccefs of his Majefty's arms belongs to the appointments and the meafures of the LATE Adminiftration. IV. That it is the opinion of this meeting, That the recal of the gallant and fuccefsful Admiral Rodney, in the hour of victory and purfuit, is none of the MEASURES, produced by the change of MEN, for which an Addrefs Ihould be prefented to his Majefty * V. That * The firft afl of the new Miniftry was to recal Admiral Rod- ney, immediately after his defeating the Trench fleet in the Weft Indies on the lath of April. FUGITIVE PIECES. 9 V. That it is the opinion of this meeting, that the perfonal interference of a Minifter, in matters of election, does not correfpond with that freedom and independence of Parliament fo warmly contended for, or that purity of conduct the nation was led to expect upon a change of MEN; and is therefore none of the MEASURES for which a Loyal Addrefs fhould now be prefented *. " VI. That it is the opinion of this meeting, that the distinction made between the Englishman, or* Elector, and the Minifter, interfering in an election, though one and the fame perfon, is neither found logic nor found morality ; and were fuch fyftem to be the rule of action, judges might difpenfe villainy for juftice, and all moral diftinctions would be at an end. Therefore, that fuch principles in Minifters fhould be none of the reafons for prefenting an Ad- drefs on the change of MEN. " VII. That it is the opinion of this meeting, that the rejection of the Scots Militia Bill is no proof that this country has obtained liberal-minded friends by the change of MEN ; but that the terms on which they propofed the bill fhould pais were highly un- juft, and would have been violently oppreffive. Therefore, that fuch an affront to the country B Ihould * This alludes to Mr Fox's fpeeches in Parliament, and his perfonal attendance on the Huftings^ at Covent Garden, at the eletSbon, and his explanation afterwards of his conduift, in the Houfc of Commons, whtn he faid, that he had attended as an Englifiman, not as the Minifter. io FUGITIVE PIECES. ihould be none of thofe MEASURES for which an Addrefs fhould at this time be prefented. " VIII. That it is the opinion of this meeting, that the only MEASURE that can yet be made the foundation of an Addrefs fince the change of MEN is, the Reduction of his Majefty's Civil Lift; and as his Majefty, in all probability, has not yet thought pro- per to thank his fervants for this piece of attention to oeconomy, it cannot, with any propriety, be made the foundation of a Loyal Addrefs that would be gracioufly received. " IX. That it is the opinion of this meeting, that, concerning the great plan of public oeconomy, much has been promifed, and very little performed, and that even the famous Retrenching Bill has been wonderfully retrenched fince the late change of M EN. That the Board of Police in Scotland has been abo- lifhed, although places of lefs utility have been pre- ferved in England *. Therefore that this country has no good reafon to addrefs the Throne at pre- fent, upon account of the change of MEN, or their MEASURES. " X. That it is the opinion of this meeting, that the propofed Loyal Addrefs would be premature, and, * The Board of Police was aholifhed, and an equivalent fum given as a penfion to Colonel Barre, whofe eloquence had been chifly exerted againft penfions- crying up eeconomy, and rc- dultion of the Civil Lift, FUGITIVE PIECES. JT and, as it might have the appearance of infult to Majefty, it ought to be fuppreiTed. " XL That it is the opinion of this meeting, that every meafure that (hall tend to preferve the RIGHTS of our VALUABLE CONSTITUTION, or that fhall be conducive to the HONOUR, the DIGNITY, or the PROSPERITY of the nation, deferves the ap- probation and fupport of every good citizen ; and that every member of the ftate fhould be jealous of INNOVATIONS, cautious of being mifled by PAR- TY, and careful not to become the tool of FAC- TION." THESE Refolutions created much fpeculationj and if was not generally known that there had been no fuch meeting of Citizens, till many months after the publication. They were the fubject of much controverfy in the London Papers, and, coinciding with the general fenfe of the nation, put a flop to the progrefs of the loyal addrefles. The Public Ad- vertifer of London took notice of them in the fol- lowing terms. " The Refolutions of the Citizens of Edinburgh appear to poflefs every mark of fpirit and cool de termination requifite to be faithfully followed and adhered to in the prefent Situation of affairs. The B 2 intrepid 12 FUGITIVE PIECES. intrepid fentiments of independency which run through the whole, and the greatnefs of foul which is exhibited in every part of them, communicate to the understanding and imprefs the mind with a very favourable and advantageous idea of the difpaffionate wifdom of that meeting. This is the true manner of proceeding, and it is fincerely to be wifhed it was adopted all over Scotland. The Refolutions alluded to do not to/A' of, nor bear any refemblance to, that fpecies of fervile cringing, and unbecoming adtions, which many of the Scots Reprefentatives praclife fo much at Court, to the infinite dishonour of their country." THESE Refolutions were followed by the follow- ing fuppofed debate upon the fubjecl:, which was then rnuch agitated. DEBATE ON THE LOYAL ADDRESS on the Change of MEN and MEA- SURES, and LORD SHEL BURN E'S Plan of putting ARMS into the hands of the People of SCOTLAND. JL HERE is a club of us who meet three times a week to liften to the beft reader of the newipaper who happens to be prefent. We perceived by a late paper, that the famous Loyal Addrefs for what it is his Majefty's new Ministers W U1 do, is tra- velling FUGITIVE PIECES. 13 veiling about in great cliltrefs for names, and that it has received a refpite of ten days, in hopes of find- ing fome friends. Our club happening to (it later laft night than ufual, fell upon the fubject, and ina ny of our members, fired with the love of liquor and their country, were led to take up the coniide- ration of the propriety of fuch an addrels at this time, which brought on a very warm debate. TOM BUCKSKIN, the breeches-maker, was the firft who fpoke. He infilled there could be no iiich Addrefs really intended j for he had traced it from lying under a crucible in the Parliament-fquare, through all its ftages, to the place of its prelent lodgment with an obfcure printer. What, faid he, with great vehemence (for he is a violent and a vul- gar man), could ajn addrefs really intended for a King be treated with fuch indignity, unlefs the royal water-clofet wanted a fupply, and people knew not how to make a prefent of wafte paper, without the aukward form of an addrefs. Befides, Sir, in one of our late papers, we were told, from the beft au- thority, as was faid, that a Peer of the realm had figned this addrefs ; yet, in the fucceeding paper, we were allured, that this information was a fcanda- lous falfehood. Are theie, Mr Prefes, the proceed- ings of gentlemen, acting for the good of their country ? Sir, I fay, it muft be fome vile impofi- tion, and it is a fhame to this metropolis to allow it to be fuppofed to be real. SAM. i 4 FUGITIVE PIECES. SAM. BARK, who is one of the richeft men a- mongft us, next rofe. He fpoke fluently, for he can multiply words amazingly. He went over the whole political ground for many years pair.. HE faid, if we had peace with America, although we fhould thereby lofe half of the empire, and had incurred many millions of expence in her protection and defence, yet we would have raw hides much cheaper, and could fupply the markets with leather in greater quantities, and at lower rates, than in our prefent curfed ruinous fituation. He hoped much from the change of men and meafures, and therefore wiihed well to the addrefs. He faid it was a real addrefs ; for though he had not iigned the addrefs himfelf, yet two fine boys of his ac- quaintance, who were learning round text with Mr Mouldwarp, had figned it ; and he advifed the whole club, who could write, to follow their ex- ample *. HE was followed by ALPIN M'ALPIN, lately arrived from the heights of Argylefhire, and fettled in the neighbourhood as a fmall grocer. This fpeak- cr, not being much mafter of the Englifh language, and the club as little matters of the Gaelic, it is dif- ficult to give an account of what he faid. He feem- ed, It was faid, that manj fchool-boys had figned the addrefs, to make a fhow of names. FUGITIVE PIECES. 15 ed, however, to be in a violent paffion at the Ame- rican war ; for he had loft two fecond coufins, bra? fallows, by it, who had never been mentioned in the London Gazette ; and the late Miniftry had ne- ver thought proper to make him a Commiffioner. He hoped better things from the new ones, and he would fign the addrefs ; though it was his opi- nion, that it fhould have been written in Gaelic. THE next that followed was WILL BARM, the brewer, a very great politician indeed ! He went to the very root of the matter. He afferted round- ly, that the laft Minifters were .all a pack of clay- heads ! He fpoke of the Roman hiftory, contraft- ed the battles of Cannse and Aftium with that of Bunker's Hill and Rodney's late trifling advantage. He proceeded to prove, that America, although a part of the Britifh empire, and protected at the ex- pence of the Mother Country, and under the fame juft and equal laws, had no obligation to contribute any part towards the exigencies of Government, when fhe had arms in her hands, and a power to refift. He infifted, that the recent example of Ire- land corroborated his argument, and, therefore, that the late Minifters, who had prefumed to pre- ferve the empire entire under the fame laws, for the good of the whole, were Jfjort-fighted, wicked, profligate, abandoned, blundering blockheads. He then proceeded to Ihow how matters Jlould be con- dufted, and that, if he had the management, no- thing 16 FUGITIVE PIECES. thing could poffibly go wrong. He here took the command of the Grand Fleet, and, before he had brought it back to'Spithead, he had burnt Paris, taken his Moft Chriftian Majefty prifoner at Ver- failles, and fent that great and good ally in a prelent to his friends, the worthy Congrefs. He had made Holland a pool of water, and banifhed the Spaniards to Africa. He then allotted the mines of Potofi to pay the national debt ; and concluded with taking the tax off malt and ftrong beer. HERE the Prefes reminded the club, that they too much refembled the Houfe of Commons, by Avandering from the fubjecl, taking narrow partial views, and drawing the attention of the meeting to trivial extraneous circumftances, of no importance to the object of the debate. It was not proper, he faid, for gentlemen to he confidering their own little matters or connections, when the great bufinefs of the na- tion was the fubjecl: of their consideration. Al- though fuch liberties were allowed in the Houfe of Commons, they fhould not be permitted here, while he had the honour of fitting in the Chair. He de- fired gentlemen to keep ftriclly to the fubjecl: in de- bate. THE next who rofe was TOM TOUCH-HOLE, the gunfmith, a blunderbufs of a fellow as ever lived, He faid he would fpeak ftrictly to the queftion of the addrefs ; but, firft, fays he, Mr Preies, What FUGITIVE PIECES. 17 is become of Lord Shelburne's arming plan *' ? The laft fpeaker, Sir, in my opinion, has clearly proved, from the inftances of America and Ireland, that no country, when pofleffed of arms, and the know- ledge of ufmg them, fhould be under an obligation to obey any Government but what they pleafe. This, Sir, is the glorious liberty of the fubject. Sir, I infift upon it, that, were the people of Scotland armed, affairs in this kingdom would have a very different afpect, and many manufactures, which are now at a low ebb (fuch as my own), would be great- ly encouraged, and, confequently, much good would accrue to the country. The meafure, Sir, is a po- pular one, and will meet with the approbation of thoufancls. When tenants, Sir, cannot pay their rents, and are threatened to be diftreffed by their landlords, they will prefent their firelocks, and tell them, they have no right to demand money from people who have arms in their hands. Are not tffe new Minifters, who are the ftewards of the nation, granting every thing demanded by America and Ireland for this very reafon ? Sir, you may talk of law and juftice as long as you pleafe ; but I main- tain, that a gun and bayonet is the moft convincing of all arguments. C WHEN ' In the Edinburgh Evening Courant, June to. 1/82, the plan for arming the people is given at full length^y the Sheriff of the county. The principal towns were to furriifh a certain number of companies arms and ammunition \ve:e to be fun:iih- ed by Government magazines for arms and anuv.unkion were to be erected in every town and village, &c. i8 FUGITIVE PIECES. WHEN the peeple are armed, Sir, fhow me the boldeft patron in Scotland that will venture to give a prefentation that is not agreeable to the mob. The Minifters of the Gofpel, Sir, will then be- come Commanding Officers, and, inftead of peace, they will bring us afword; and in whofe hands can the rights and morals of the people be fo properly placed? Then,' Sir, the Eighty-five Societies in Glafgow, and the Proteftant AfTociation, may cut the throats of all the poor Papifts with impunity, in retaliation for St Bartholomew's day, that right e- oufnefs may run doiun the JJreets as a Jlream, and judgment as a mighty river, as the Clergy themfelves often tell us. Here he was called to order ; but TOUCH-HOLE declared he would not be interrupt- ed, and iniifted on his privilege. He proceeded Will the people then pay any taxes but what they plenfe ? I believe not ; witnefs America and Ire- land ! Will the Lord Provoft and Magiftrates, with their white wands, be able to command the populace ? Sir, let me tell you, that white wands and velvet coats are poor defences againft guns and bayonets. This country will then be as free and in- dependent as either America or Ireland ; and the Minifters who grant all we afk, becaufe they can- not refufe, will become as popular in Scotland, as the preient Miniftry are with the Advocates for the Rebels and the Irifh. I muft own, Sir, that the la ft Miniftry were for preferving the empire entire, and for dilFufing good laws among an united and a happy people. But are not the prefent much bet- ter, FUGITIVE PIECES. 19 ter, who, by a glorious oppofition, drove out thcfc unfuccefsful men, and who now will allow the em- pire to be broken into as many independencies as there are parifhes ; nay, who will permit every man to be independent, rather than lofe their po- pularity or their places ? I fay, Sir, that this inde- pendency of the Individual is the right of every free- born fubject No ! not fubjeci, Mr Prefes, that is not the word, for that implies dependence ; but every man who can carry a mulket, I meant to fay ; for which no word that I know of anfwers but fol~ dier, and yet that is not the thing. However, for thefe weighty reafons, I vote for the addrefs. WHEN TOUCH-HOLE the gunfmith had ended t SOJJIRE BALDERDASH rofe, and begged permif- fion to fpeak, though he was there but as a vifitor. The Prefes informed him, that liberty and decorum were the principles of his government, and he might proceed. He then fet out, in a iingularly un- couth tone of voice, and went into many ftrange vagaries. He took a very wide view of the queftion. He went back to Magna Cbarta, then fpoke much of the Kirk and the Con/litution, the Bill of Rights, the Omnipotence of the People, and the impotence and itifignijicance of Majefty, He faid, it was the glo- rious and undoubted right of the people to addrefs or petition the throne upon all occafions even of a chimney-fweeper, if he judged the meafures of Go- vernment ill-conduc"led. People, fays he, are ftruck with a fort of awe at the name of King ! Let me C 2 endeavour 20 FUGITIVE PIECES. endeavour to remove that flavifh feeling. Pray, Gentlemen, What is a King ? Why, he is no more than a Chief Magiftrate, like the Provoft of a borough, or rather the Deacon of an incorporation. It is the voice of the people that clefts the King, as well as them. He holds the throne, Gentlemen, by your confent ; and, believe me, every one of you is greater than a KING. At this many of the mem- bers bridled up, and ftared at each other with mag- nificent furprife. This gave ardour to the fpeaker.- Yes, fays he, Gentlemen, I repeat it ; every man prefent is greater than a King, if you knew and felt your own dignity. THE electors, Gentlemen, muft, in the nature of things, be fuperior to the elected; for they beftow the favour. The elected then is only the humble fervant of the eleEtors. I ipeak upon the folid prin- ciples of the conftitution, Gentlemen. Now, pray what is the King ? The King is but the fervant of the people ; and, inftead of being the Sovereign of a free ftate, you plainly fee that he is the loweft in the fcale of political importance. Keep in mind the ancient precept j,,a9i KM. Know yourfelves, Gen- tlemen, and aft up to your high dignity. Let not MAJESTY be a bugbear to you. Analyfe it, and judge for yourfelves. Strip MAJESTY of its exter- nals, and it remains but A JEST. The very etymo- logy of the word proves this inconteftably to you, Gentlemen. In the early periods of civil fociety, the word was agreed upon, in order to keep upon the FUGITIVE PIECES. 2* the minds' of the people this great and important truth. You may, perhaps, Gentlemen, from the long increafing influence of the Crown, have loft the true meaning of MAJESTY. Let me lead you to it in an eafy manner. I beg of you, Gentlemen, obferve attentively the word MAJESTY then ftrip it of its externals, the letters M and Y, and what remains ? I fee, by your fmiling countenances, that you have it already, a jeft, a mere jeft. Now fup- pofe, Gentlemen, the throne was abdicated, as we know has been the cafe, would it not be fupplied by the voice and confent of the people ? Power mufh be lodged fomewhere, for the regulation of civil fociety. Some muft command, and fome muft obey or ibciety would be a hell upon earth. But let this power be any where but in the King or his Council. Gentlemen, the late change of men has been a glorious change for Britain : They faw that the influence of the Crown was increafing, and and ought to be diminiihed ; and have they not been induftrious to bring it as low as poffible ? Nay, they have even told you, that it was his Majefty's own defire ! and we cannot difbelieve them. Allow them to go on a little longer, Gentlemen, and they will render that branch of the conftitution what it ought to be, that is to fay, nothing at all ; and you will find his Majefty, through his Minifters, even approving of the meafure ; for he is a wonderful good King from what he was, when the prefent Minifters were in Oppofition. Be unanimous then, Gentlemen, 22 FUGITIVE PIECES. Gentlemen, in figning this loyal addrefs to his Ma- jefty, and the new Minifhy will blefs you. HERE TOM BUCKSKIN was feen to turn up his eyes, and cock his fhoulder, muttering, " Such ftuff. The Squire contradi&s himielf." MR ELLWAND next rofe. He approved of the fentiments of the laft fpeaker exceedingly, as ufual ; for they were true Whig principles, and the rea- foning was unanfwerable. He then got fuddenly into a paflion about the words Whig and Tory, nei- ther of which he feemed diftinctly to underftand. He was delighted with the etymology of Majefty. It was convincing to him. But, in fhort, he poilefied too much paffion, and too few ideas, to enable him to fpeak fo as to be underftood. He was violent for the prefent Miniftry, and for iigning the addrefs ; but for what reafons could not be difcovered. THE next who rofe was BILLY BUTTON the tailor, who had been fitting with ftupid attention, and gaping amazement, during the debate, and now begged leave, in his foft way, to fpeak a few words. He was humbly of opinion, that his brother BUCK- SKIN had been too violent againft the addrefs, and he would convince him of it. AT this BUCKSKIN drawing his pipe from his cheek, and prolonging his whiff, gave him a ftare of aftonifhment and contempt, that feemed to freeze poor FUGITIVE PIECES. 23 poor BUTTON'S blood. He went on however to fay, that he was well aflured that it was a.real ad- drefs, for that Becky that morning in bed had ad- vifed him to fign it, for who knows, fays fhe, but you may be made King's tailor. Your name will be read by the King, and his Majefty will naturally afk his Minifter, Who is Mr Button ? and this, you know, may have very happy effects. Be fure, fays fhe, my dear, to write your name as large as pof- fible, to ftrike the eye. Befides, fays fhe, as there have been hardly a hundred out of eighty thoufand inhabitants found who have figned the addrefs, and of thefe hundred very few whom any body knows, you have the better chance, you know, my dear, of being taken notice of. I'll tell you a fecret, fays fhe, you know my name is Tod. How long is it lince King Charles the Second was in this country ? I don't know, fays I. Well, fays fhe, I am a coufin to Mr Secretary Fox, and it cannot be above five and twenty times removed. My dear wife, fays I, be affured I'll fign the addrefs, coft what it will. Now, Mr Prefes, my brother Buckfkin, poor man, lofes his chance by his violence. I wifh him well as an honeft man ; but he ftands in his own light, efpecially as I am aflured that there has not yet been an appointment of breeches-maker fo her Majefty , although thofe of the Princefs Amelia and the Maids of Honour have been filled up. MR BUCKSKIN now rofe; and, being a rough fpoken man, with all his good fenfe, with great in- dignation, * 4 FUGITIVE' PIECES, dignation,faid Button was a pitiful fneaking fellow. He faid he would fign no addrefs upon fuch an occafion, even if it was real. That no wife fhould wheedle him out of his common fenfe. He could live by his bulinefs, he faid, and he did not care for the fmile or the frown of any Minifter, either of \he.Jlate or of the gofpel. He faid that he differed in opinion from all the fpeakers, but moft from the Squire, who had fpoken contradictory nonfenfe with the ap- pearance of being very wife. He agreed with Touch-hole in the confequences that would follow on arming the people, but he differed from him in the conclufion he drew ; for he thought he had gi- ven the very beft reafons why the people fhould not be armed. As to the addrefs, he had heard no rea- fon whatever why it fhould be fent. He faid that he had always been of the mind, that America had behaved with ingratitude, infolence, and difrefpecl: to the mother country. That France, Spain, and Holland had truckled like treacherous, knavifh, lying fcoundrels ; and that Ireland had afted unge- neroufly (not to fay worfe) in taking the hour of diftrefs to demand more than the portion of her mother's goods. That Scotland had alone remain- ed dutiful, attached, and loyal, though fhe had been ill ufed ; and yet he hoped fhe would remain fteady to the conftitutional rights of the ftate. He faid that America and Ireland, by their refiftance, had, or would have, an independent free trade, and, having no taxes, in time would underfell Bri- tain in every article of commerce. WITH FUGITIVE PIECES, ^ WITH t-egard to Minifters, he was of opinion, that Lord North was an honeft indolent Minifter, and, had he met with fupport and unanimity, might have been more fuccefsful. He was of opinion, that much of the diftrefs of Britain was owing to the very men it was now propofed to thank. But thanks, fays he, for what, Mr Prefes ? Let them do fome- thing worthy of thanks. Did not the Houfe of Commons, in compliance with a fit of popular fren- zy, vote thanks to Admiral Keppel for a victory he. had never gained ? Do not the nation now laugh at the vote, and do not the Houfe of Commons alfo now laugh at themfelves for having pafled it ? One man alone had the good fenfe and firmnefs to oppofe it. Honeft John Strut ! here's his health. Sir,, if ycu will have an addrefs, on the change o men and meafures, draw out a new one ; for the Firft Minifter of State, a very good man, I believe, has undergone a confiderabie change fince this ad- drefs was written*. Sir, I will fign no addrefs on a change of men, till I know them better ; for, I'll Jhake no man by the band, a fid call him friend, till know of IL> hat Jlitff he is made. HERE COLLOP the butcher, and PETER PIPE- STAPLE the tobaccoriift, and a multitude of others* called out Bravo ! Bravo ! A Vote ! a Vote I Ad- drefs ! or No Addrefs ! MR BARK, MR BARM, D and * Accounts of the Marquis of ^ockingham's death had a&uallf arrived when the promoters of the Loyal Addrefs were toet for- figning it. 26 FUGITIVE PIECES. and their friends, feeing the complexion of the Houfe, retired. BUTTON was heard to whifper, in going out, Addrefs. When the door was fliut, Mo ULDE WARP'S nofe was feen through the key- hole. TOM TOUCH-HOLE, however, remained vociferating " Give me the commiffion for the " mufkets, and, blaft me with gunpowder, if I " care, whether they are ufed againft the old or ." die new Miniftry." The queftion was now put, when it carried una- nimoufly, No Addrefs. TOUCH-HOLE begged leave to be non llqtiet. THUS have I given an account of the debates in the free and eafy club, and am, &c. BOB SQUINTUM. JULY 6. 1782. E. C. [THE pronenefs which people have for cheap bargains is often made the occafion of great impofitions. The difference of price is in ge- neral only attended to, and other circumftan- ces left out of view. Itinerant auctioneers and advertifers of cheap wares are thus often reform- ed to, and the fair trader, who gives credit, deferted FUGITIVE PIECES. 27 deferted and fhunned. The following ridicule upon quackery in various lines of bufmefs ap peared in the Edinburgh Gazette.] TO THE PUBLIC. A. PERSON of Real Character (abhorring decep- tion), having obferved the avidity with which every fpecics of goods is bought by the Good People of Scotland, provided they have the SELLER'S afler- tion that they are cheaper than the beft, has laid himfelf out to fupply them more honourably than they have hitherto been by many advertifing QUACK S. He begs leave to inform the Public, that there will foon be opened AN UNIVERSAL WAREHOUSE FOR ALL SORTS OF GOODS, Which 'will be fold much below the Manufaclurers Prices^ and difcount allowed for ready money- Among a Variety of Articles, too tedious to men- tion, the following may be depended on ; and fuch Fafhionable Articles as may occaiionally ap- pear will always be early added. I. BEST SUPERFINE CLOTHS OF ALL KINDS. A fmgle yard will be fold much cheaper D 2 than 28 FUGITIVE PIECES. than the moft considerable merchant can purchafe it at the manufacturing towns in England, though buying 50,000 yards together, and paying ready money. The Seller being a Perfon of Character, prefumey his word will not be doubted ; and, as all com- parifons are odious, he hopes none will be fo ill- bred as to make comparifons between his goods and thofe of other dealers. $3. B. Some veritable NTNE-TIMES-DYED FLANNEL, for Sore Throats, Gout, and Rheu- inatifm. - WATERS-PROOF CLOTHS, which prevent external wetting, and promote perfpi- ration. II. CHINA WARE of every fpecies, from the .true Nankeen to the veritable Preftonpans, as cheap as Staftbrdfliire Ware or Brown Pottery. N. B. Some nice eyes may perhaps perceive, that many of the Tea Cups and Bafons are not ex- act circles, but rather inclined to the elliptical or oval form ; and that the Dimes and Tureens have not the ring of found metal. But fuch obfervations are to be difregarded. As the one half of mankind are fond of {how, and with- out difcernment, moft families will gain re- putatiorij and fqve money, by purchaiing as above. Ill, FUGITIVE PIECES. 29 III. FINE WRITING PAPERS of all kinds, as cheap as the original RAGS. The Public will do well to attend to this article. The very beft THIN POST, of juft proportions and curious fabric. Ha- ving the beautiful quality of being remarkably thin and tranfparent, it is well calculated for bearing ink only on one fide, which always gives an air of gen- tility and confequence to the writer. N. B, As it is not too ftrongly fized, and of a foft texture, it may occafionally ferve for blot* ting paper, and other nfeful purpofes. PAPERS, at the loweft prices ever known in this or in any other country. Some fheets there may- be with holes, and others greafy and foul ; but, upon the whole, more good fheets will be found than bad. Thofe who buy a quantity will be z- dulgcd with having it gilt, on paying for it. JV. B. No reflections are expected after delivery. No returns will be received, and therefore rea- dy money muft be paid. Superior Papers at the ufual prices. IV. BOOKS OF ALL SIZES, warranted to pleafe the eye, will be fold as cheap as the price of the binding. As moft libraries are intended more for fhow than ufe, this efteemed article of luxury may now be procured for a trifle. Gentlemen and Ladies are entreated 3 o FUGITIVE PIECES. entreated to take notice, that the character of * Per/on ofTafte is often obtained by the pofleffion of a neat well chofen collection of books, and that even wooden books, if locked in a deep book-cafe, have helped a perfon to a reputation for literature ; but here, if a book Ihould have the chance to be opened, the real impreffion of types will be feen, and the owner prevented from the uneafinefs fre- quently attendant on wooden libraries, that of being expofed to ridicule, and of feeing a gilded vo- lume torn from its glue, and lacerating his brother's fides. SERMONS warranted unpreached, written in a fair eafy hand. Alfo a Collection of Sermons, which render going to church unnecefTary. N. B. Wanted a PRINTER who has learned the Alphabet; and handfome encouragement to one who can read manufcript. V. JEWELLERY AND PLATE of all kinds, warranted to look as well as the moft coftly, and to laft a fufficient time for the price. Handfome WATCHES as cheap as Wooden Clocks, and war- ranted to go many hours after purchafe. Hand- fome mounted SHOW SWORDS, with cane blades. PISTOLS, gold bulhed, and unperforated touch- lioles, to render duels harmlefs, and to fave fa- fhionable honour. Enormous BUCKLES, of faihion- able FUGITIVE PIECES. 31 able patterns. Long-necked SPURS, full fix inches, with tearing rowels. VI. FUNERALS PERFORMED, in a fhowy and elegant manner, amazingly cheap. N. B. There is not a greater impofltion upon mankind than in the above article. It is, no doubt, refpeclful to the memory of the dead, and gratifying to the vanity of the living, to have funerals very pompous and magnificent ; and it is thought mean to challenge an under- taker's bill when the tear is in the eye. But families may now have all the fplendor of a magnificent funeral at a very eafy rate, by ap- plying to the Advertifer, who has invented the moft elegant flipping gilt cafe mountings and trappings of every kind for coffins, of all fizes, which are eafily drawn up after the coffin reaches the ground. By this fimple contri- vance, the living may have the benefit of ma- ny a good dinner, which the burying the dead with coftly funeral ornaments often de- prives them of. VII. PERFUMERY of all kinds, warranted ge- nuine, and every article belonging to this branch of buflnefs at aftonifhingly low terms. VERITABLE BEARS GREASE, as cheap as hogs lard or fait butter. Scented Pomatums hard and foft, 3 2 fctTGITIVE PIECES. foft, as cheap as mutton-fuet. Vegetable Milk of Rofes, cheaper than afTes milk. Alib Vegetable Chicken Gloves and Circaffian Bloom. Elaftic Wigs, more natural than the hair. Ladies Tetes and Curls, as cheap as horfe and cow tails. The beft Hair- powder, as cheap as common flour. Marefchal Powder, with the true fpice and mulk flavour, as cheap as pepper and fait. Red, Pink, and Browri Hair-powders, as cheap as brick-duft or pounded tanners bark. VIII. PATENT ARTICLES of every kind, cheaper than any Patentee can afford to fell them, Among others, he recommends the Patent AUTOMATON FIGURE, which ftands on the table by the plate at dinner or fupper, and, by lifting the meat to the mouth, faves Ladies and Gentlemen the trouble of feeding themfelves. Alfo the Fi- gure for Writing Letters, without the danger of bad fpelling, of which the living are fo often guilty. Patent Elaftic Handkerchiefs, which wring . the nofe without the afllftance of the thumb and finger. Patent Wigs, to fit clofer than the hair. Patent Behinds of all fizes, cool and light. Patent Bofoms, PROMINENT beyond all belief! Patent Gloves. Patent Shoes, Stockings, and Buckles. Patent Ela- ftic Breeches, which do not require above a week to be able to walk in. Patent Hats, Bonnets, and Night-caps. Patent Thimbles, Ear-pickers, and Tooth-picks. Twenty different kinds of Patent Tooth-powders, for Tcouring the teeth to tranfpa- rency. FUGITIVE PIECES. 33 i-ency. Patent Rolls and Butter. Patent Bifcuit. Patent Snuff" and Tobacco, &c. &c. &c. IX. GENUINE SPIRITS of all kinds retailed in fmall quantities, at a much lower price than the King's duty. Rum not too much luht/krfied. True Holland Gin diftilled by the beft makers in town and country. N. B. Thefe Genuine Spirits are all from an EN- TERED EXCISE CELLAR. X. GENUINE FOREIGN WHITE AND RED WINES, laft vintage, as cheap as home-brewed. Currant Wine, of vintage 1780$ of the fame quali- ty and price as the above. XI. TEA warranted not overloaded with Jloe or elder leaves, and properly mixed. Congo as cheap as chopped hay, and others in proportion. HAWKERS well treated, and enabled to fell to private families at a handfome profit. N. B. As a great calamity has happened to our fellow countrymen in the Weft Indies, the loiveft fugars will be raifed only 3d. per Ib. * that we may retain a remembrance of their E misfortunes, * On the news of the hurricane in the. Weft Indies, fugars inftamly ftarted jd. per lb. 34 FUGITIVE PIECES. misfortunes, and a felloiv feeling for their diftreffes. XII. GENUINE MEDICINES of all kinds, for every difeafc ; and, for the lovers of great bargains, double the quantity for half the price in the Labo- ratories. A large ftrong vomit for three farthings, and a patient kept purging a week for a penny. Jefuits Bark, as cheap as tanners Extract of Nettles, for pimples on the face and the Ormlkirk Medi- cine, dog cheap. XIII. POISON for vermin of every kind, male cr female, and no queftions afked. That valuable treatife, Every Man his own Vermin Killer, fold in dozens or iingle copies. XIV. TRAPS for animals of the mojt cautiotts na- 1 ture y 'which never fail from the Moufe to the Man Trap. THE Advertifer entreats that the Public will not conlider him as ufing the paltry tricks of advertising Quacks : He can allure the world that he is a man of character, and his manner of dealing will prove it. Sales below prime coft are continued from year to year ; and the great fums of money that are made by fuch dealers mufl convince the moft cre- dulous, that they can be underfold in every article ; and the Public may be allured, that even the manu- faflurer hiaifelf cannot afford the goods fo cheap FUGITIVE PIECES. 35 as the Advertifer ; and he entreats, that Ladies and Gentlemen will believe him t and trujl the quality to his integrity. TIMELY notice of the place of fale will be given in a future advertifement, and commiffioiis will be called for at every houfe. E. G. [A VERY extraordinary licentioufnefs had been, obferved for fome time among the youth of both fexes, and particularly the very young females, as would appear from the following note, .which was publiihed in the EDINBURGH EVENING COURANT. This note had led to enquiry, and the Printer, who had refufed other ftrictures, admitted thofe that follow.] " WE have received JUVENAL'S favour, and " muft allow, if his facts are well founded, that his " fatire, though cutting and fevere, is certainly " juft ; and that no language can be too ftrong to " lafli fo abjectly vicious and deteftable a charac- " ter. But, as it is fo marked, and fuch circum- " ftances pointed out, as might roufe indignation, the Pipe, and, though laft not leaft, the virtuous, the venerable, and dignified WIG, who, fo much to their honour and kind at- tention, always inform the public of their meetings. Alfo that an officer fhould be appointed to take no- tice of all dram drinkers, lovers of afrojty nail in the morning, of cauld cocks, Athole brofe, old mans milk, half and half, bitters, chearers^ doctors, torrie rsrries > &c. &c. &c. $thly, THAT as fympathyand benevolence are fo properly recommended to all denominations, the pre- ies moved, that a fubfcription fhould be opened for the relief of the induftrious poor, and that thofe who did not fubfcribe fhould have the poor billeted upon them, in proportion to their circumftances, till next harveft ; and for this purpoie he propofed, that a lift of the fubfcribers fhould be published. By order of the meeting, TIMOTHY CQRNCRAIK, Clerk, FUGITIVE PIECES. 59 Edin. Sept. 15. A H E following fimple narrative fpeaks much inftrudtion, and may be of ufe to parents and youth, THEOPHRASTUS, A gentleman in the medical line was forne time ago afked to vifit a patient, and was conducted by an elderly woman up three pair of flairs, to a gloomy, fliabby, iky-lighted apartment. When he entered, he perceived two young females fitting on the fide of a dirty bed without curtains. On approaching, he found one of them nearly in the agonies of death, fupported by the other, who was perfuading her to take a bit of bread dipped in wine. The pale ema- ciated figure refufed, faying, in a feeble languid voice, That it would but contribute to prolong her mifery, which fhe hoped was near an end. Look- ing at the Doctor with earneftnefs, fhe faid, You have come too late, Sir j I want not your afjiftance. " O conld'fl thou minifter to a mind difcas'd ; Or flop th' accefs and paflage to remorfe." Here fhe fetched a deep figh, and dropped upon the bed Every mean of relief was afforded, but in vain ; for, in lefs than an hour, fhe expired. H 2 IN &> FUGITIVE PIECES. IN a fmall box by the fide of the bed were found fome papers, by which it appeared, that the unhap- py young woman had had more than an ordinary education, that fhe had changed her name, and con- cealed that of her parents, whom ihe iincerely pitied, and whofe greateft fault had been too much indul- gence, and a mlfplaced confidence in the prudence of their favourite daughter. With fome directions refpecting her funeral, the following pathetic lines were found, and fome little money in the corner of the box was affigned to have them engraved on her tomb-ftone : V E R S E S For my Tomb-ftone, if ever I fliall have one, By a Proftitute and a Penitent. w HERE REST THE RELIOJDES OF A NYMPH UNDONE, WHO DYING, WlSH'n HER DAYS HAD NE'ER BEGUN.' THE wretched victim of a quick decay, Reliev'd from life, on this cold bed of clay (The laft and only refuge for my woes) A loft, love-ruin'd Female I repofe. FROM FUGITIVE PIECES. di FROM the fad hour I liften'd to his charms, Yielding, half forc'd, in the deceiver's arras, To that, wliofe awful veil hides every fault, Sheltering my fuff 'rings in this welcome vault, When pamper'd, ftarv'd, abandon'd, or in drink, My thoughts were rack'd in ftriving not to think ; Nor could rejected Confcience gain the pow'r Of calm reflection for one ferious hour j I durft not look to what I was before,* My foul fhrunk back, and wiih'd to be no more, One ftep to vice, ftole on without controul, Till, ftep by ftep, perdition wreck'd the foul. OF eye undaunted, and of touch impure, Old e'er of age, wore out when fcarce mature ; Daily debas'd to ftifle my difguft Of life which funk me with the loweft duft ; Cover'd with guilt, infection, debt, and want, My home a brothel t and the ftreet my haunt, Full feven long years of infamy I've pin'd, And fondled, loath'd, and prey'd upon mankind, Till, the full courfe of fin and vice gone through, My fhatter'd fabric fail'd at twenty-two ; Then Death, with every horror in his train, Clos'd the fad fcene of riot, guilt, and pain* O ! could it fliut the future from my view 4 Nor dread Eternity ! my life renew \ Renew to anguifh, and the deepeft woe, While endlefs ages never ceafe to flow ! YE Cz FUGITIVE PIECES. YE fair Aflbciates of my opening bloom ! O ! come and weep, and profit at my tomb To me fweet peace and virtue once were known, And Peace, O Virtue ! Peace is all thy own.'* Let my fhort youth my blighted beauty prove The fatal poifon of unlawful love ; " Let jealous fears your every ftep attend, Mark well Qjz flatt'rer, from the real friend." Chafte keep the mind ; preferve the manners purcj If peace at home, or love you would fecure. O ! think how quick my foul career I ran, The dupe of Paflion, Vanity, and Man; Then fhun the path where foft temptations fliine Yours be the lefibn fad experience mine ! [The FUGITIVE PIECES. 63 [The following Letters, which appeared at Edin- burgh in December 1783 arc now reprinted with fome additions .3 LETTER I. Eheu ! fugaces labuntur anni ? HOK. Ttmpora muiantur t et noi mutamur. \_ HAVE often thought that it might not only be entertaining, but ufeful, to remark, from time to time, the viciffitudes of manners in fociety ; and, by comparing the prefent with the paft, to examine, whether, as a people, or as individuals, we were im- proving or declining. It is frequently difficult to af- iign a reafon for the revolutions which take place in the manners of a country, or to trace the caufes that have occafloned a change ; but in all cafes, the rft ftep towards inveftigating the caufe, is to ftate the facts. A plan of this kind, frequently repeated, might be of great utility, by leading to cultivation and improvement in fome things, and to correction or prohibition in others; while it would, at the fame time, afford a valuable fund of facts for the philofopher, the hutorian, or the annalift. EVERY perfon who remembers but a few years back, muil be fenfible of a very ftriking difference in the external appearance of Edinburgh, and alfo ui the mods of living, and manners of the people. LET 64 FUGITIVE PIECES. LET us ftate a comparifon, for inftance, no far- ther back than between the year 1763 and the year 1783 ; and many features of the prefent time will probably appear prominent and linking, Avhich, in the gradual progrefs of fociety, have palTed altogether unnoticed, or have been but faintly perceived. So remarkable a change is not perhaps to be equalled in fo fhort a period in any city of Europe ; nor in the fame city for two centuries, taking all the alte- rations together. IN 1 763 Edinburgh was almoft confined within the city-walls. Nicolfon's Street and Square, Cha-i pel-ftreet, the greateft part of Brifto-ftreet, Crich- ton-ftreet, George's Square, Teviot-row, Buccleugh- ftreet, St Patrick's Square, &c. &c. to the fouth, were fields and orchards To the north, there was no bridge ; and (till of late) the New Town, with all its elegant and magnificent buildings, fquares, rows, courts, &c. did not exift It may with truth be faid, that there is not now in Europe a more beau- tiful terrafs than Prince's Street j nor a grander or more elegant ftreet than George-ftreet. It is mode- rate to fay, that two millions Sterling have been ex- pended on building in and about Edinburgh fince 1763. The environs of Edinburgh cannot be furpaf- fed in views of the fublime, piclurefque, and beautiful. IN 1763 People of quality and fafliion lived in houfes, which, in 1783, are inhabited by traclefmen, and people in humble and ordinary life The Lord JuJKct- FUGITIVE PIECES. 65 Juflice-Clerk Tinivald's houfe was lately ppflefled by a French Teacher ^Lord Prejtdi-nt Craigie's houfe is at prefent pofiefled by a Rouping-ivife or Sales-wo- man of old furniture and Lord Drummoris houfe was lately left by a Chairman for want of accommo- dation *. I N !y86 A Bridge to the fouth, over the Cow- gate, is built, and the areas for fhops and houfes on the eaft fide of it, fold higher than perhaps ever was known in any city, even than in Rome, in the moft flourifhing times of the republic or the empire, viz. at the rate of no lefs than 96,000 1. per acre! The area of 422 feet in front, by 48, and fome of it 32 deep, for upwards of 22,000!. I N !786 The valued rents of houfes in Edin- burgh, which pay cefs or land-tax, are more than double what they were in 1 763 j-, and are daily encreaflns. I IN * The honfe of the Duke of Douglas at the Union, is now poffeffcd by a wheel-wright. Oliver Cromwell once lived in the prefent gloomy SheriffClerk's Chamher. The great Mar- quis of Argyle's houfe, in the Caftkhill, is poflfifTed by a holier, at ial, per annum. I In 1635 The rents within the city were L. 19,211 10 o In 1688, 2 4,333 6 8 Ini 75 t, 31-497 o o Jn 1783, 54,371 o o In 1786 The valued rents are above 66,000 o o N. B.- One-fifth is deduced from the real rent in dating the cef* 66 FUGITIVE PIECES. IN 1 763 The revenue of the Poft-office of Edin- burgh was reckoned about 10,000!. per annum. IN 1 783 The fame revenue is upwards of 3 5,000!. IN 1763 There were two ftage-coaches, with three horfes, a coachman, and poftilion, each, which went to Leith every hour from eight in the morn- ing till eight at night, and confumed the hour upon the ftage : There were no other ftage-coaches in Scotland, except one, which fet out once a month for London, and it was fixteen or eighteen days upon the journey. IN 1783 There are four or five ftage-coaches to Leith every half hour, and they run it in 15 or 20 minutes : DUNN, who now has the magnificent ho- tels in the New Town, was the firft perfon who at- tempted a ftage-coach to Dalkeith, a village fix miles diftant : There are now ftage-coaches, flies, and di- ligences, to every confiderable town in Scotland, and to many of them two, three, or four : To London, there are no lefs than fixty ftage-coaches monthly, or fifteen every week, and they reach the capital in four days: And, in 1786, the flage-coach which carries the mail, reaches London in Jixty hours t by the fame road that required fixteen or eighteen days for the eftabliihed ftage-coach in 1763. IN cefs Leith is not included in the above, though now one tity with Edinburgh. Nor any of the flreets and fqnares to the fouth. The valuation is confined to the royalty only.* FUGITIVE PIECES. 67 IN 1763 The hackney-coaches in Edinburgh were few in number, and perhaps the worft of the kind in Britain. IN 1783 The number of hackney-coaches is more than tripled, and they are the handfomeft car- riages, and have the beft horfes for the purpofe, without exception, in Europe. IN 1783 Triple the number of merchants, phy- ftcians, furgeons, &c. keep their own carriages, that ever did in any former period. IN 1783 Several Prefbyterian minifters in Edin- burgh, and profefTors in the univerlity, keep their own carriages ; a circumftance which, in a circum- fcribed walk of life as to fortune, does honour to die literary abilities of many of them, and is perhaps; unequalled in any former period of the hiftory of the Church, or of the Univerfity. IN 1763 Literary property, or authors acquiring money by their writings, was hardly known in Scot- land : David Hume and Dr Robertfon had indeed a very few years before fold fome of their works ; the one, a part of the Hiftory of Britain, for 200!. ; the other, the Hiftory of Scotland, for 6ogl. two, vols. in quarto each, IN 1783 The value of literary property has been, carried higher by the Scots than ever was known, among any people. David Hume received 5000!, I 2 far 68 FUGITIVE PIECES, for the remainder of his Hiftory of Britain ; ami Dr Robertfon, for his fecond work, received 4500!. In fermon- writing, the Scots have alfo excel- led 9 and although, in 1763, they were reckoned remarkably deficient in this fpecies of compo- .fition, yet, in 1783, a minifter of Edinburgh has written the moft admired fermons that ever were published, jjnd obtained the higheft price that ever was given for a work of the kind. N- B. The merit of thefe fermo'ns obtained for Dr Blair a penfion of 200!. per annum, PREVIOUS to the 1763, the Scots had made no very diftinguifhed figure in literature, as writers, particularly in the department of Hiftory and Belles Lettres. Lord Kames had, the year before, publifh- ed his Elements of Criticifm. Hume and Robertfon had made their firft effays in the walk of Hiftory, a fliort time before, as mentioned above. IN 1783' The Scots have diftinguifhed them- felves in a remarkable manner in many departments of literature ; and, within this fliort period of twenty years, the names of Hume, Robertfon, Orme, Hen- ry, Tytler, Watfon, Kames, Reid, Beattie, Ofwald, Fergufon, Smith, Monboddo, Gregories (father and fon), Cullen, Homes (poet and phyfician), Monro, Hunter, Stewart, Blair, Mackenzie, Campbell, Ge- rard, Millar, Macpherfon, Brydon, Moore, Stuart, Arnot, Mickle, Gillies, and many other eminent writers, too long to enumerate, have appeared. IN FUGITIVE PIECES. 6 9 IN 1786 Edinburgh has produced two periodi- cal papers, which have been more admired, than perhaps any of the kind fince the Spectator. PREVIOUS to 1763 The Scots had not difrin- guiihed themfelves remarkably as public fpeakers in the Houfe of Commons. IK 1783 The Scots have had moW than their proportion of diftinguifhed fpeakers in the Houfe of Commons. Wedderburn .(Lord Loughborough), Sir Gilbert Elliot, Johnftons, Sir A. Ferguflbn, Erfkines, Dempfter, Adam, Maitland, Dundas, &c. &c. IN 1763 There were 3 96 four-wheeled carriages entered to pay duty, and 462 two-wheeled. IN 1783 There are 1268 four-wheeled carriages entered to pay duty, and 338 two-wheeled. IN 1763 Few coaches or chaifes were made in Edinburgh : The nobility and gentry, in general, brought their carriages from London, and Paris was reckoned the place in Europe where the moil ele- gant carriages were made. IN 1783 Coaches and chaifes are conftructed as elegantly in Edinburgh as any where in Europe : Many are yearly exported to Peterfburgh, and the cities on the Baltic ; and there was lately an order from Paris to one coacbmaker in Edinburgh, for one 7 o FUGITIVE PIECES. one thoufand crane-necked carriages, to be executed in three years. IN 1 763 There was no fuch profeffion known as an Haberdafher. IN 1783 The profeffion of an Haberdafher (which figMBp a Jack of all trades, including the Mercer, the Alidiner, the Linen-draper ', the Hatter, the Hofier, the Glover, and many others) is nearly the moft frequent in town. IN 1763 There was no fuch profeffion known as a Perfumer : Barbers and Wigmakers were nume- rous, and were in the order of decent burgefies : HairdreiTers were few, and hardly permitted to drefs on Sundays, and many of them voluntarily declined it. IN 1783 Perfumers have fplendid fhops in every principal ftreet : Some of them advertife the keeping of bears, to kill occafionally, for greafing ladies and gentlemens hair, as fuperior to any other animal fat. HairdrefTers are more than tripled in number, and their bufieft day is Sunday ; and there is a ProfefTor who advertifes a Hair-dreffing Academy, and lec- tures on that noble and ufeful art. IN 1 763 There was no fuch thing known, or ufed, as an umbrella 5 but an eminent furgeon, who had occafion to run about much in the courfe of bu- finefs, FUGITIVE PIECES. 71 flnefs, made ufe of one about the year 1780; and, in 1783, umbrellas are almoft as frequent as fhoes and ftockings, and many umbrella warehoufes are opened. IN 1763 There were no Oyfter-cellars, or, if one, it was for the reception of the loweft rank. IN 1783 Oyfter-cellars * are numerous, and are become places of genteel and fafhionable refort, and the frequent rendezvous of dancing parties, or pri- vate afiemblies. IN 1783 There arealfo dancing fchools for fer- vants and tradefmens apprentices. IN 1763 A ftranger coming to Edinburgh was obliged to put up at a dirty uncomfortable inn, or to remove to private lodgings. There was no fuch place as an Hotel j the word indeed was not known, or only intelligible to French fcholars. IN 1783 A ftranger maybe accommodated, not only comfortably, but moft elegantly, at many pu- blic Hotels ; and the perfon who, in 1763, was obli- ged to put up with accommodation little better than that of a waggoner or carrier, may now be lodged like a prince, and command every luxury of life. His guinea, it muft be owned, 'will not go quite fo far as it did in 1763. IN * Or taverns taking that name; 7 a FUGITIVE PIECES. IN 1 763 The number of Boys at the High School were not 200. IN 1 783 The number of Boys at the High School were about 500 j the moft numerous fchool in Britain. IN 1 763 The Society of Cadies * was numerous ; they were ufeful and intelligent fervants of the pu- blic ; and they would have run an ervand to any part of the city for a penny. IN 1783 The Cadies are few, and thefe gene- rally pimps, or occalional waiters at taverns. They have the impudence to expect fixpence where they formerly got a penny ; and the only knowledge there is of their being an incorporated fociety, is by fome of the principal ones tormenting ftrangers and citizens the whole year through with a box, begging for their poor. IN 1763 The wages to fervant-maids were, ge- nerally, from 3!. to 4!. 45. a-year. They drefled decently, in blue or red cloaks or plaids, fuitable to their ftation. IN 1783 The wages are nearly the fame; but the drefs and appearance are greatly altered, the fer- vant-maids being almoft as fine as their miftrefles * Men who bear a ticket or badge, who run meflages, fell pamphlets, and attend Grangers by the day or hour, as fervants. They are incorporated under regulations of the magiftratcs. FUGITIVE PIECES. 73 were in 1 763 : They have now fllk cloaks and caps, ribbons, ruffles, flounced petticoats, &c. Their whole year's wages are insufficient for rigging out moft of them for one Sunday or holiday. The manners and converfation of moft of them are by no means fuited to the improving of the children of the families whom they ferve. IN 1 763 The fhore-dues at Leith (a fmall tax paid to the city of Edinburgh on landing goods at the quays), amounted to 580!. IN 1783 The fhore-diies at Leith amounted to N. B. There was a great importation of grain to the port of Leith in 1783, not lei's than 8oo,oocl. Sterling having gone out of Scotland for this year's deficiency of grain. But the fhore-dues are above 3000!. per annum, inde- pendent of any extraordinary importation. IN 1763, and for fome years after There was one fhip which made an annual voyage to Peteri- burgh ; and never brought tallow, if any other freight offered. Three tons of tallow were im- ported into Leith in this year 1763, which came from Newcaftle* I N ^83 The fhips from Leith and the Frith of Forth to the Baltic amount to hundreds. They make K two 74 FUGITIVE PIECES. two voyages in the year, and fome of them three. In 1786, above 2500 tons of tallow were imported directly from the Baltic into Leith. IN 1763 Every {hip from London to Leith brought part of her cargo in foap. IN 1783 Every (hip that goes from Leith to Lon- don carries away part of her cargo in foap. IN 1763 There was one glafs-houfe at Leith for green bottles. IN 1783 There are three glafs-houfes, and as fine chryftal and window glafs arc made at Leith as any where in Europe* IN 1783 The increafe of tonnage in {hipping be- longing to the port of Leith fince 1763, is 42,234 tons ; and, fince that period, has fo greatly increa- fcd, that magnificent plans are making out for en- larging the prefent harbour, which is found much too fmall for the number of {hips. IN 1763 The revenue arifing from the diftillery in Scotland amounted to 4739!. i8s. icd. IN 1785 The revenue arifing from the diftillery amounted to 93,701!. i2s. id. N. B. The diftrict of Fairntofli paid no duty in either years, having a grant from the Crown to diftill free of excife duty. FUGITIVE PIECES. 75 IN 1763 Edinburgh was chiefly fupplied with vegetables and garden-fluffs from Muflelburgh and the neighbourhood, which were cried through the ftreets by women with creels or bafkets on their backs : Any fudden increafe of people would have raifed all the markets : A fmall camp at Muflelburgh a few years before had this effect. IN 1783 The markets of Edinburgh are as amply fupplied with vegetables, and every neceffary of life, as any in Europe. In 1782, Admiral Parker's fleet, and a Jamaica fleet, confifting together of 1 5 fail of the line, many frigates, and about 600 merchantmen, lay near two months in Leith Roads, were fully fupplied with every kind of provifions, and the mar- kets were not raifed one farthing, although there could not be lefs than an addition of 20,000 men. THE crews of the Jamaica fleet, who were dread- fully afflicted with fcurvy, were foon reflored to health by the plentiful fupplies of ftrawberries, and frefh vegetables and provisions, which they received : The merchants of London, who, from humanity, but thro' ignorance, fent four tranfports with freih pro- vifions to the fleet, had them returned without breaking bulk : It is believed that a fimilar inftance tQ the above would not have happened at any port m Britain. I SHALL extend this comparifon in a future letter. I am, &c. E. C. THEOPHRASTUS. K 2 LETTER 70' FUGITIVE PIECES. LETTER II. Aetas parentum, pejor avis, tulit Nos uequtores, mox daturos Progeniem vitiofiorem. H o B. J[ SHALL now give a few facts refpe&ing Edinburgh in the years 1763 and 1783, which have a more im- mediate connection with MANNERS. IN 1763 People of fafhion dined at two o'clock, or a little after; bufinefs was attended in the afternoon. It Avas common to lock the {hops at one o'clock, and to open them after dinner at two. IN 1783 People of fafhion, and of the middle rank, dine at four and five o'clock : No bufinefs is done after dinner, that having of itielf become a very ferious bufinefs. IN 1 763 It was the fafhion for gentlemen to at- tend the drawing-rooms of the ladies in the after- noons, to drink tea, and to mix in the fociety and converfation of the women. IN 1783 The drawing-rooms are totally defert- ed ; and the only opportunity gentlemen have of being FUGITIVE PIECES. 77 being in ladies company, is when they happen to mefs together at dinner or at fupper j and even then an impatience is often fhewn till the ladies retire. It would appear that the dignity of the female charac- ter, and the refpect which it commanded, is conii- derably lefTened, and that the bottle, and diffoiute- nefs of manners, are heightened, in the eftimation pf the men. IN 1763 It was fafhionable to goto church, and people were interested about religion. Sunday was ftriclly obferved by all ranks as a day of devotion j and it was difgraceful to be feen on the ftreets du- ring the time of public worfhip. Families attended church, with their children and fervants, and fa-. mily-worhip was frequent. The collections at the church-doors for the poor amounted yearly to 1500!, and upwards, IN 1783 Attendance on church is much neglect- ed : Sunday is made a day of relaxation : Families think it ungenteel to take their domeflics to church with them : The ftreets are often crowded in the time of worfhip ; and, in the evenings, they are ihamefully loofe and riotous. Family- worfhip is almoft totally difufed, and it is even wearing out among the clergy : The collections at the church- doors for the poor have fallen below loool. So that, with more people, and more money, the collections 3t the church-doors are lefTened near 6ool. a-year. IT 7 8 FUGITIVE PIECES. IT may be mentioned here, as a curious fact, That, for more than half of this century, one of the imalleir. churches in Edinburgh has collected more money for the Poor, at the time of difpenfing the facrament, than eight churches did upon the fame occafion in 1783. IN no refpect are the manners of the 1763 and 1783 more remarkable than in the modefty, decen- cy, referve, dignity, and delicacy, of the one period, compared with the loofenefs, diffipation, forward- nels, freedom, and debauchery, of the other. People now ceafe to blufh at what would formerly have been reckoned a crime. IN 1 763 The breach of the feventh command- ment was punimed by fine and church cenfure. Any inftance of conjugal infidelity in a woman would have banifhed her from fociety, and her company would have been rejected even by the men* IN 1783 Although the law punifhing adultery with death ftands unrepealed, yet even church-cen- fure is difufed, and feparations, divorces, recrimina- tions, collufions, feparate maintenances, are become frequent. Women who have been rendered infa- mous by public divorce, have been permitted to marry the Adulterer; and it is not without example, that the known Adulterefs has been, by people of fafhion, again received into fociety, notwithstanding the FUGITIVE PIECES. 791 the endeavours of our worthy Queen to check fuch a violation of morality, decency, the laws of the country, and the rights of the virtuous. IN 1 763 The fines collected by the kirk-treafu- rer for baftard-children amounted to 154!. and, up- on an average of ten fucceeding years, they were ipol. IN 1783 The fines for baftard-children amount- ed to near 6ool. N. B. It is to be remarked, that the repentance- ftool, and all church cenfure, for fornication and adultery, have been feveral years abo- liflied. IN 1763 The clergy vifited, catechifed, and in- ftrucled the families within their refpeftive parifhes, in the principles of morality, Chriftianity, and tke relative duties of life. IN 1783 Vifiting and catechising are difufed, except by one or two of the clergy : if people do not chufe to go to church, they may remain as ignorant as Hottentots, and the Ten Commandments be as little known as refcinded acts of parliament. Religion is the only tie that can reftrain, in any degree, the licentioufoefs of the vulgar ^ when duet 8d FUGITIVE PIECES. that is loft, ferocity of manners, and every breach of morality, may be expected. Hoc fonte derivata clades In patriam, populumque fluxit. IN 1 763 Mafters took charge of their apprenti- ces, and kept them under their eye in their own houfes. IN 1783 Few matters will receive apprentices to fbay in the houfe ; and yet from them fucceeding fociety is to be formed, and future magistrates and councillors chofen: If they attend their hours ofbu- finefs, mafters take no farther charge. The reft of their time may be pafied (as it generally is) in vice and debauchery ; hence they become idle, infolent, and difhoneft. Mafters complain of their fervants and apprentices, but the evil often lies with themfelves. IN 1 763 If a young man had been led aftray by bad company, he was afhamed of it, and moft care- fully concealed it. A young man could not have been feen in the Play houfe with bad women, with- out being reckoned a BLACKGUARD, and expoled to contempt and ridicu?e. IN 1783 Youth in Edinburgh early commence what is called puppies, and boaft of their experience in vice before they leave fchool. Young men are not afliamed to fit in the fide-boxes with women of the town FUGITIVE PIECES. 81 town, and afterwards go into the boxes with young ladies of character, and women of fafhion j and this is not in general, treated, as it fhould be, as an infult, but often meets with no check, either from the mother or the daughter. i IN 1 763 There were about fix or feven brothels or houfes of bad fame in Edinburgh, and a very few only of the loweft and moft ignorant order of females ikulked about at night. A perfon might have walked from the Caftlehill to the Abbey, without being ac- cofted by a fingk proftitute. The only one of the impure tribe who could afford a filk gown, was a Charlotte Davidfon, who had been a fervant-maid, and afterwards died mad. IN 1783 The number of brothels and houfes of civil accommodation are increafed to fome hun- dreds ; and the 'women of the toivn are more than in an equal proportion. Every quarter of the city and fuburbs is infefted with multitudes of females, abandoned to vice, and many of them before paffion could miflead, or reafon teach them right from wrong. Many mothers live by the proftitution of their daughters. Gentlemens and citizens daugh- ters are upon the town, who, by their drefs and bold deportment, in the face of day, feem to tell us that the term WH E ceafes to be a re^ proach. 82 FUGITIVE PIECES. IN 1 763 The Canongate was the fouleft quarter of the city with refpect to abandoned women and brothels. IN 1783 The Canongate, by the vigilance of the magiftrates of that diftrict, is the cleaneft and moft quiet. SOME years after 1763, an alarm was taken by the inhabitants for the health of the children at the High School, from the fmallnefs of the rooms, and the numbers crowded into them ; and they procured the largeft and moft elegant fchool-houle in Britain to be erected. IN 1783 The health of the boys being provided for, there is no alarm 'taken refpccling the corrup- tion of their morals. In Blackfriar's Wynd, which may be called the very avenue to the High School, there were lately twenty-feven houfes of bad fame *. The boys are daily accuftomed to hear language, and to fee manners, that early corrupt their young minds. Many of them, before they enter their teens, boaft of gallantries and intrigues (and in a line too) which their parents little think of. Prudent mo- thers will be cautious what company their daughters are in, left, in place of the innocent gambols of children, they fliould be engaged in the frolics of vice and licentioufnels. * This nuifance is fincc removed. FUGITIVE PIECES. 83 IN 1 763 People fent their daughters to Edin- burgh, to be accomplifhed in their education, and to give them urbanity of manners. An Edinburgh education was thought the moft likely to procure them a good marriage. IN 1783 Many people prefer a country-educa- tion for their daughters ; and men of fenfe and worth prefer a young woman bred in the country, of inno- cent aftd ample manners, with virtuous principles, to one with tinfel-accomplifhments, and probably a giddy and corrupted mind. Marriages are not near- ly fo frequent as they were in 1763. IN 1763 In the beft families in town, the edu- cation of daughters was fitted, not only to embellifh, and improve their minds, but to accomplilh them in the ufeful and neceflary arts of domeftic economy. The fewing-fchool, the paftry-fchool, were then ef- fential branches of female education ; nor was a young lady of the beft family aihamed to go to mar- ket with her mother. IN 1783 The daughters even of tradefmen con- fume the mornings at the toilet, (to which rouge is now an appendage), or in {trolling from the perfu- mer's to the milliner's, &c. : They would blufh to be leen in a market : The cares of the family are de- volved upon a houfekeeper, and Mifs employs thofe heavy hours, when Ihe is difengaged from public or L 2 private S 4 FUGITIVE PIECES. private nmufements, in improving her mind from the precious Jlores of a circulating library. IT may now be {aid, that the generality of young men are bold in vice, and that too many of the young women aflame the meretricious airs and flip- pancy of courtezans. IN 1763 Deep mourning for relations was worn, and continued long : That for a hufband or wife twelve months. IN 1783 Mournings are flight, and worn for a very fhort time. IN 1 763 There was one dancing afiembly-room ; and the profits were given for the fupport of the Charity Workhoufe. Minuets were danced by each fet, previous to the country dances. Strict regularity with refpect to drefs and decorum, and great digni- ty of manners were obferved. IN 1783 There are three new elegant afiembly- rooms built, befides one at Leith ; but the Charity Workhoufe is ftarving. Minuets are given up, and country dances are only ufed, which have often a nearer refemblance to a romp than elegant and grace- ful dancing. Drefs, particularly by the men, is much neglected ; and many of them reel from the tavern, fluttered with wine, to an aflembly of as elegant and beautiful women as any in Europe. IN FUGITIVE PIECES. ?5 IN 1763 The company at the public aflemblies met at five o'clock in the afternoon, and the dan- cing began at fix, and ended at eleven, by public or- ders of the managers, which were never tranfgrefTed. IN 1 783 The public aflemblies meet at eight and nine o'clock, and the Lady Direclrefs fometimes does not make her appearance till ten. The young Miiles and Mailers, who would be mortified not to fee out the ball, thus return home at three or four in the morning, and yawn and gape, and complain of head- achs all the next day. IN 1 763 The weekly Concert of Mufic began at fix o'clock. IN 1783 The Concert begins at feven o'clock *. N, B. The barbarous cuflom of the gentlemen fa- vifig the ladies, as it was called, after St Ceci- lia's concert, by drinking immoderately, is now given up. IN 1763 The queflion refpe&ing the morality of ftage-plays was much agitated. A clergyman a few years before had been brought before the General AiTembly, for having written a tragedy, perhaps one of the moil chaile and interefting in the Engliih lan- guage f. By thofe who attended the Theatre, even with * The hour of meeting is fince altered arain to one-half paft fix o'cldck. f The Tragedy of Douglas, by Mr Home, then a clergyman. 6 FUGITIVE PIECES. with fcruple, Saturday night was thought the moft improper in the week for going to the play. Any cler- gyman, who had been known to have gone to the Playhoufe, would have been depofed by the General Affembly of the Church. IN 1783 The morality of ftage-plays, or their ef- fects on fociety, are never thought of. The moft crouded houfes are always on Saturday night. The boxes for the Saturday's-night's play are generally befpoken for the feafon, fo that ftrangers often on that night cannot get a place. This method of ta- king a box for the Saturday-night through the fea- fon, was lately much praclifed by boarding-miftref- fes, fo that there can be no choice of the play, but the young ladies muft take the dim that is fet before them. The trafh that by this means is often pre- fented (for it is always the worft play of the week), cannot fail to prevent over delicacy. IN 1 763 Young ladies might have walked thro' the ftreets in perfect fecurity at all hours. No per- fon would have prefumed to have interrupted, or fpoken to them. v IN 1783 The rmftrelTes of boarding-fchools find it necefiary to advertife, that their young ladies are not permitted to go abroad without proper attend- ants : The fame precaution is allb neceflury at dan- cing-fchools. FUGITIVE PIECES. 87 IN 1763 A young man was termed ^fine fellonv^ who, to a well-informed and an accomplifhed mind, added elegance of manners, and a conduct guided by principle ; one who would not have injured the rights of the meaneft individual 5 who contracted no debts that he could not honourably pay , and thought every breach of morality unbecoming the character of a gentleman. IN 1783 The term fine fellow is applied to one who can drink three bottles ; who difcharges all debts of honour, (or game-debts and tavern-bills), and e- vaclcs payment of every other ; who fwears immode- rately, and before ladies, and talks of his word of honour ; who ridicules religion and morality as folly and hypocrify, but without argument ; who is very jolly at the table of his friend, and will lofe no op- portunity of feducing his wife, if fhe is handfome, or debauching his daughter ; but, on the mention of fuch a thing being done to his connections, fwears he would cut the throat, or blow out the brains of his deareft companion, who Avould make fuch an at- tempt. Senlible mothers fhould be attentive to what kind of fine fe ih'ws are admitted to vHit in their fa- milies. IN 1 763 Mr Whitefield, and other pious divines from England, ufed octafionally to vifit Edinburgh, and they were much attended by all ranks, who liftened to the doctrines of Chriftianity and mora- lity. IN 88 FUGITIVE PIECES. IN 1783 An itinerant quack doctor publicly dif- feminates obfcenity and blafphemy, infults magiftra- cy, and fets the laws, decency, and common fenfe, at defiance *. IN 1763, and many years preceding and follow- ing The execution of criminals was rare : Three annually were reckoned the average for the whole kingdom. There were four fucceeding years, in which there was not an execution in the whole king- dom of Scotland. IN 1783 There were fix criminals under fentencc of death in Edinburgh in one week ; and, upon the Autumn Circuit, no lefs than thirty-feven capital indictments were iflued. I am, &c. THEOPHRASTUS, E. C. * A quack at this time, rendered confpicuous by unparallslled impudence, gave public lectures (as he called them) in Edin- burgh. To the honour of the police, he was imprifoned, and the prohibition to his lectures was afterwards followed by the city of Newcattle, and the jn{lices of Northumberland and Dur- ham ; yet he had lectured two years in London unchecked. LETTER FUGITIVE PIECES. LETTER III. Quid trifles querimonix, Si non fupplicio culpa reciditur ? Quid leges fine moribus Vanae proficiunt? HOR. 1 NOW. fend you a few particulars, in which Edin- burgh has made little or no change iince 1753. IN 1783 The flaughter-houfes remain where they did, in fpite of an act of parliament for their remo- val, and the univerfal complaint of the inhabitants of the nuifance, with the teftimony of phyficians and furgeons, of their pernicious effects to health. IN 1783 The old city of Edinburgh, tho' fituated by nature for being one of the cleaneft in the world, cannot even yet be complimented in this refpect ; and, although the High Street was lately funk five feet upon a rapid declivity, it was never thought of ma- king common fewers on each fide. The ancient river Tumble, like the Flavus Tiber of old Rome, ftill continues to run. Rufticus expedlat, dutn defluit amnis ; at ilia Labiiur, et labetur in omne volubilis xvum. IN 1783 The lighting of the ftreets is much the fame as in 1763 ; for, although there are more lamps M an4 9 o FUGITIVE PIECES. and lamp-pofts, there is no more oil. At the firft lighting they ferve only to make darknefs vifible ;" and they are now much fooner extinct than in the regular and decent 17 63, when people were at home early, and went to bed by eleven o'clock *. IN 1783 The city-guard confifls of the fame number of men as in 1 763, although the city is triple the extent, and the manners more loofe. The High Street is the only one that can be faid to be guard- ed. The New Town, and all the ftreets to the fouth, and fuburbs, are totally unprotected. N. B. The country in general has improved much in the Englifh language fince 1763; but the city-guard feem to preferve the purity of their native Gaelic tongue, fo that few of the citizens underfland or are underftood by them. On dif- banding the army, one would have imagined that a corps of good men, who underftood Englilh, might have been got in place of Mountaineers. IN 1783 The Charity Workhoufe is ftarving, and foliciting fupplies, and Edinburgh is the only place in the ifland that does not provide for its poor j yet magnificent dancing afTembly-rooms are built in every quarter. The people belonging to the courts of law indeed, pay no poor's money, al- though the moft opulent part of the community ; and * Since the above ren ark was made, the lamps have been bet- ter attended to- FUGITIVE PIECES. 9 i and they fend a large proportion of managers to dif- pofe of funds to which they do not contribute ! IN 1783 The Old Town is ftill without public neceflaries, although the beft fituated place perhaps in Britain for the purpofe, and the Old Town never can be cleanly without them. There is one excep- tion to this fince 1763, raifed by fubfcription of the neighbourhood, on the application of a citizen, which fhows how practicable it is. IN 1783 A great majority of fervant maids con- tinue their abhorrence at wearing fhoes and flock- ings in the morning. IN 1783 The ftreets are infefted, as formerly, by idle ballad -fingers, although no perfon, by the law of the borough, is allowed to hawk or cry papers in the ftreets, but the Cadies, under cognifance of the magiftrates. The only difference is, that their ballads are infinitely more loofe than they were, and that fervants and citizens children make excufes to be abfent, to liften to thefe abominable promoters of vice and low manners, and convey corruption into families by purchafing them. IN 1783 The ftreets are much more infefted with beggars and proftitutes than in any former period of the hiftory of the city, and probably will continue to be fo till a bridewell is provided : A bridewell has been long talked of and projected ; but this moft neceiTa- M 2 ry ^2 FUGITIVE PIECES. ry improvement has been forgotten, in the rage for the embellifhment of the city. IN 1783 The Univerfity is in the fame ruinous condition that it was in 1763, and the moft cele- brated univerfity at prefent in Europe is the worft accommodated : Some of the profeflbrs are even obliged to have lecturing-rooms without the college for their numerous ftudents. IN 1763 Tne public records of Scotland were kept in a dungeon called the Laigh Parliament- houfe. IN 1783 The records are kept in the fame place, although a moft magnificent building has been erect- ed for the purpofe ; but hitherto it has been unfinifh- ed, and only occupied by pigeons. Edinburgh may indeed boaft of having the moft magnificent pigeon- houfe in Europe *. ALTHOUGH the North Bridge was not built in 1763, yet, ever fince it has been built, the open bal- lufters have been complained of; and, in 1783, paf- fengers continue to be blown from the pavement in- to the mud in the middle of the bridge. An expe- riment was made laft year, by {hutting up part of thefe ballufters, on the fouth end ; and having been found effectual in defending paffengers from the vio- lent * Since the above was written, meafures have been taken for finifliijig the Regifter Office, and it is now in great forwarduefs. FUGITIVE PIECES. ^3 lent gufts of wind, and fcreening their eyes from, blood and {laughter, nothing more has been thought requifite to be done *. MANY of the facts I have now furnifhed you with are curious. They point out the gradual progrefs of luxury, and by what imperceptible degrees fociety may advance to refinement, nay even in fome points to corruption, yet matters of real utility be negledl- cd. 1 am, &c. THEOPHRASTUS. E. C. [Soon after the publication of the foregoing Letters, the following appeared.] SIR, Edln. Jan. 26. 1784. IT was with very great pleafure I read the three letters, lignedTHEOpHRASTUs. That gentleman deferves the thanks of every perfon who is interefted in the caufe of religion and virtue. The number of facts which he has collected, illuftrative of the man- ners and modes of living in our metropolis, from- the year 1763 to the year i783,muft ftrike ever perfon of obfervation with amazement ; and calls aloud for the * Since the above was written, the balluftcrs on the weft Gd* ( ' the North Bridge have been filled up. 94 FUGITIVE PIECES. the exertion of every virtuous citizen, to lend his aid to ftem the tide of profligacy that is pouring in a- mongft us. The following ftrictures are meant as fupplementary to Theophraftus's letters, upon a fub- ject which he has briefly touched, and which feems to take the lead of the preient reigning vices of the age. OF all the writers of antiquity, whether philofo- phers or poets, I know none who conveys the fub- lime precepts of morality with fuch force and energy as Horace. Of his moral odes, there is none, in my opinion, -that, in elevation of fentiment, poetical imagery, and force of expreflion, exceeds the 6th of the 3d book. In this ode, Horace tells his country- men, that their contempt of religion, profligacy, and corruption of manners, were the fole caufes which had nearly overturned the ftate, and had brought misfortune and mifery into every family ! " If you are matters of the world, fays he, it is becaufe you have acknowledged the heavenly powers to be your matters : This is the foundation of all your gran- deur : Upon it depends the fuccefs of all your enter- prizes : It is owing to irreligion that Italy has felt her late difgraces and mournful difafters *." From thefe truths, the poet proceeds to point out the fource of thofe particular vices which had overfpread all * Dis te minorem quod gcris, imperas : HInc omne principium, hue refer cxitum. Dii multa negle&i dederunt, Hefperiz mala luflnofse. FUGITIVE PIECES. 95 all ranks of the people. " The prefent age, fays Horace, fo fruitful in vice, has rent afunder the fa- cred bond of marriage, and introduced corruption of blood into families and private houfes : From a- dultery, as from a fountain, are derived the whole difafters both in public and private life *." I will not fhock my countrywomen with an interpretation of the laft of the ftanzas quoted below, which, how- ever applicable to the ladies of Rome in that age, and, perhaps, to thofe of our fitter metropolis in the prefent, yet, I am willing to think, is not yet fo to the fex in this northern latitude Heaven forbid that it ever fhould ! As in Rome before its fall, fo in Britain in the 1 prefent age, amongft other vicious purfuits, that of criminal gallantry appears to take the lead. In vice, as in other things, there is a falhion, which, like a contagion, foon fpreads itfelf over all ranks. Altho* its progreflion is gradual, yet, that we in Scotland are advancing, and not by flow fteps, the annals of a * Fecunda culps fecula, nuptias Pritnum inquinavere, et genus et donios. Hoc fonte derivata ciades, In patriatn populumque fluxit ! Motus doceri gaudet lonicos Matura virgo, et fingitur artubus, Jam nunc et inceftos amores DC tenero meditatur ungui, Mox juniores quairit adulteros Inter msriti vira . 95 FUGITIVE PIECES. a certain Court *, fpeak aloud ! From them, it will ap- pear, that, within thefe forty years, for one procefs of adultery then recorded in that Court, there are now twenty in the fame fpace of time : The reafon is apparent. Forty years ago, there was fome reli- gion amongft us : Adultery was believed to be a crime, both with refpect to Heaven and the moral ties of fociety ; nay, with regard to the laft, it was held to be a capital crime, and, by the laws of the land, was punifhed as fuch : But thefe will be called rude times and Gothic laws. Will it be believed, that almoft within the memory of living people, two perfons of refpe&able rank were publicly brought to trial, convicted, and put to death, upon the ftatutary act of King William for adultery f. It would be a moft alarming affair to a number of [fafhionable people of the prefent times, were the above laws to be put in execution ; and yet, were a private party injured, to bring a criminal profecution for adultery, againft the perfons who had injured him, I can con- ceive no defence that would avail againft the compe- tency of fuch trial, or the confequent punifhment on their conviction. IN * The CommuTary Court. f See in the records of the Court of Judiciary 1694, the trial of Daniel Nicolfon, writer in Edinburgh, and Mrs Marion Maxwell, widow of Mr David Pringle furgeon, indicted at the inftance of the Crown, for adultery and criminal co-habitation : Upon the verdict of an affize, finding the libel proven, the Lords adjudged Daniel Nicolfon to be hanged, and Mrs Pringle to be beheaded. FUGITIVE PIECES. 97 IN the days of our fathers, the crime of adultery, we fee, was capital j the guilty perfons were decla* red infamous, and punifhed with death ! Let us turn to the prefent time : We now in this, as in other fafliionable vices, follow, with fwift pace, our neigh- bours beyond the Tweed, and on the Continent. There, with impunity, two criminals publifh their guilt, and, adding to their infamy the crime of per- jury, by a breach of that vow which they had fo- lemnly fworn at the altar to preferve inviolate till death ; and, by another horrid piece of mockery, in the face of Heaven, they rufh together in marriage, bidding defiance to fhame, religion, honour, and re- putation ! Pudet h&c opprobria did. I will not fay that in this country we are yet arrived at the fame pitch of vice ; but, as we are daily taking large ftrides in following the fafhions and manners of our neigh- bours, how foon we may reach the fame degree in the fcale is a thought that every perfon of virtue muft Ihudder to think of! MANNERS and fafhions take their rife among the great, and from them defcend to the people. We fee, in the laft century, how far the example of the Sove- reign affected the manners of the people with refpeft to gallantry ; yet, loofe and diffipated as the court of Charles the Second then was, it may be deemed chafte in comparifon with the manners of the prefent age : With this aggravation, that, were the example of the Prince to be followed, we fee in our prefent So- N vereign 9$ FUGITIVE PIECES. vereign and his Queen, two as eminent patterns o/ religion and virtue as ever adorned a Throne I 9 I SHALL refume this fubject in a future letter. I am, &c. H O R A T I U S. E, G. LETTER II. jT muft ftrlke every thinking perfon with amaze- ment to be told, that in England there is no punifh- ment for the crime of Adultery ; that it is there confidered only as a private injury, which entitles the perfon injured to an action for damages. Nay, a di- vorce is not confequent to the conviction of this crime ; it only operates a feparation from bed and board. It requires a particular act of parliament, on full proof the of adultery ; and, even in that cafe, an alimony is awarded to the adufterefs ! Shall we then wonder at the frequency of this crime in England, \vhen, in place of punifhment, it is avowedly com- mitted as an expedient for two guilty perfons to get free of one marriage, that they may enjoy their cri- minality under the mock function of a new marriage ? Let it be remembered, to the honour of the prefent Chancellor, Lord Thurlow, that, in a late cafe be^ fore FUGITIVE PIECES. 99 fore the Houfe of Lords, where it appeared that th criminal intercourfe had been carried on in the moft open manner, with the view of obtaining a divorce, that the two criminal perfons might be at liberty to marry ; in this cafe, although the adultery was pro- ved, yet divorce was refilled to the adulterers. Such a check will no doubt have the effect to make criminals more cautious in their defign at leaft, tho' I doubt of its having the effect, in thefe loofe times, to operate a reformation. LET not, however, offenders in this country flat- ter themfelves, that adultery is not punifhable by the law of Scotland. It is declared capital by the flatutory law of King William, and we know of no fubfequent law that has repealed thefe Statutes. If it ihall be alledged, that the laws are in defuetude which declare this crime capital, let it be remember- ed that there are other penal laws in frefli pbfer- vance which ought to flrike thefe offenders with terror. By the law of Scotland, after divorce, a fub- fequent marriage between the two guilty perfons is declared void and null, and the iffue incapable to iucceed to their parents (1600, James Sixth.) 2dly, The offenders are cut off from every benefit of their former marriage ; the man forfeits the wife's mar- riage portion, and the adulterefs her marriage pro- vifion, jointure, &c. and is turned out to beggary and infamy. Thus, at prefent, ftands the law of Scotland with refpedl to adultery. How far the Mi- nifters of Law are called upon, by office, to pu^ N 3 them ioo FUGITIVE PIECES. them in execution, they and the public will judge j but if ever the circumftances of time called for fuch exertion to fave a nation, the prefent does ! I wave mentioning a certain old law, called the Seventh Commandment, which is enforced by the Divine Author of our religion, as I am afraid thefe autho- rities, with people of fafhion, are now fallen into defuetude. I {hall therefore leave them to the lower rank of people, and fuch as may ftill think it their duty to go to church, where, if they do not hear them read, and enforced from the pulpit, they may confult the Ten Commandments, as written at large on the church walls, the only paflages of Scripture which perhaps they do read. I mail conclude with a ihort addrefs to both fexes, to endeavour to open their eyes to the certain mifery and ruin that attends this crime. THOU Man of Mode and Gallantry ! thouplumeft thyfelf upon thy nice honour, virtue, humanity ! words always in thy mouth : How oppofite to thefe principles is thy practice ! Wouldft thou heiitate to rob a friend, or beggar his family ! Let me thunder it in your ears you do fo in fal ! By a thoufand vile arts, you infinuate yourfclf into his family and confidence ; you, like a thief, under truft, bafely fteal from him what he holds moft dear, the affec- tions of the wife of his bofom ! You deprive, till then an honeft woman, of her morals, her virtuej her religion ! and confign her to infamy. You de- prive a race of helplefs infants of a tender parent, FUGITIVE PIECES. 101 and reduce a whole family to ruin ! The lofs of mo- ney may be repaired ; but to rob a hufband of his wife, to have the fountain polluted from whence every ftream of domeftic happinefs is derived, is of all miferies the moft bitter and complicated. Depri- ved of the happinefs which he enjoyed at home, the reward of his toil and virtuous labour, his induftry flags, and gives way to carelefTnefs and diffipation ; defpair not unfrequently takes place, and murder completes the cataftrophe ! AND thou, infatuated "Woman ! once the refpect- ed wife of a virtuous hufband ! the fharer of his fortune, the delight of his heart, the mother of his infants ! how art thou fallen ! Seduced from the path of virtue, what mifery attends your fteps ! Your fliort career of folly is run ! Torn from your helplefs babes, on whofe innocent heads your infamy defcends ; thrown out by your hufband from the houfe where once you was miftrefs ! the hofpitable door now fhut againfl you ! defpifed by your friends, cleferted by your vile feducer, and at laft abandoned to want, milery, and remorfe ! SUCH, thou Man of Gallantry, are the triumphs of thy vile arts ! If the worm within thy breaft does not awake thee to remorfe, walk on in the ways of thy heart, and in the light of thine own eyes ! a few years puts a period to thy vicious courfe ; with the decay of thy paffions thy punifliment cdmmen- cesi When loz FUGITIVE PIECES. .. When the hey-day of the blood is paft, Thou fall'fl: into the fear and yellow leaf, And that which fliould accompany old age, As honour, love, obedience, troops of friends, Thou muft not look to have ; but, in their ftead, Curfes, both loud and deep ! THESE are the attendants of thy old age ! a juft preparative, in this life, for the miferies that await thee in the next ! 1 am, &c. HOR ATIUS. E. C. The following letter was alfo occafioned by the comparative view of Edinburgh in the 1763 and 1783, and introduced in the following manner. cc Were the example of this correfpondent to be followed throughout Britain, a moft cu- rious and valuable collection of facts might be made, illuflrative of the progrefs of fociety, and of manners. It might ferve as an hour's a- mufement to the minifter of the parifh, the fchool mafter, or any judicious obferver, to collect a fhort view of fuch facts as have happened within their refpedtive parimes. With refpect to giving a view of the increafe of the population of the country, the number of fcholars at the parifh fchools might be mentioned at the different periods j for, in ge- neral, FUGITIVE PIECES. 103 neral, even the loweft peafantry in Scotland are taught to read, and are inftructed in the principles of morality and religion. We fhall gladly receive the communications.] S I R, 1 LIVE in a country parifli forty miles north-eaft of Edinburgh. The length of the parifh is two miles, the breadth one mile, and about 120 families live in it. I am a conftant reader of your ufeful paper j and feeing Theophraftus's curious and excellent ob- fervations upon the metropolis, I was induced to make the following remarks upon the parifh in which 1 have lived for twenty-fix years. If you think them worth the inferting in your paper, they are much at your fervice. I am, &c. P. C. IN 1 763 Land was rented at fix {hillings, on an average, per acre : Only two fmall farms were in- clofed. IN 1783 Land is rented at eighteen {hillings per acre : All inclofed with thorn hedges and ftone dykes. IN 1763 No wheat w?.s fown in the parifh, ex- cept half an acre by the minifter : No grafs nor tur- nip fown, no cabbages or potatoes planted in open fields, IN 104 FUGITIVE PIECES. IN 1783 Above one hundred acres are fown with wheat : About three-fifths of the ground are under grafs, turnips, cabbages, and potatoes. IN 1 763 Land was ploughed with oxen ; a few horfes only were kept to draw the harrows in feed- time, and to bring in the corns in harveft. Seven pounds was thought a great price for a horfe. IN 1783 Oxen are not employed in agriculture : Farmers have their faddle horfes, value from fifteen, to twenty pounds, work horfes from ten to fifteen pounds each. IN 1763 The wages offervants that followed the plough were three pounds per year ; maid fervants one pound ten fhillings. IN 1783 Men fervants wages are feven or eight pounds, fome ten pounds ; maid fervants three pounds per year. IN 1763 Day-labourers were at fixpence per day, and tailors at threepence per day. IN 1783 Both are doubled in their wages. IN 1763 No Englifh cloth.was worn but by the minifter, and a quaker. IN 1783 There are few who do not wear Eng- lifh cloth, and feveral the beft fuperfine. IN FUGITIVE PIECES. 10; IN 1763 Mens ftockings, in general, were made of what was called plaiding hofe, made of white woollen cloth ; the women wore coarfe plaids ; not a cloak nor bonnet wore by the women in the whole parifh. IN 1783 Cotton and thread ftockings are com- mon, and fome have filk ; the women who wear plaids have them fine, and faced with filk j filk cloaks and bonnets are very numerous. IN 1763 There were only two hats worn in the parifh ; the men wore cloth bonnets* IN 1783 Few bonnets are worn ; the bonnetma- ker trade, in the next parifh, is given up. IN 1 763 There was one eight-day clock in the pa- rifh,^ watches, and two tea kettles. IN 1783 There are twenty-one clocks, above one hundred watches y and above eighty tea kettles. IN 1763 The people in this parifh never vifited each other but at Chriftmas, the entertainment was broth and beef, the vifitors fent to an ale-houfe for five or fix pints of ale, were merry over it without any ceremony. IN 1783 People vifit each other often, a few neighbours are invited to one lioufe to dinner, fix or O feven io6 FUGITIVE PIECES. feven difhes fet on the table, elegantly dreffed ; af- ter dinner, a large bowl of rum punch is drunk, then tea, and again another bowl ; after that fupper, and what is called the grace drink. IN 1763 All perfons in the parifh attended di- vine worfliip on Sunday. There were only four fe- ceders in the parifh. Sunday was regularly and re- ligioufly obferved. IN 1783 There is fuch a difregard of public worfhip and ordinances, that few attend divine wor- fhip with that attention which was formerly given. Ignorance prevails, although privileged with excel- lent inftructions in public fermons, in examination, and in vifiting from houfe to houfe by our paftor. "When the form of religion is difregarded, furely the power of it is near diffblution. IN 1 763 Few in this parifh were guilty of the breach of the third commandment. The name of God was reverenced and held facred. IN 1783 The third commandment feems to be almoft forgotten, and fwearing abounds. I may fay the fame of all the reft of the ten, as to public prac- tice. THE decay of religion and growth of vice, in this parifh, is very remarkable whhinthefe twenty years. E. C. [Soon FUGITIVE PIECES. 107 Soon after the foregoing comparifons of the 1763 and 1783, the following appeared. Sept. 10. 1785. IN a late paper was briefly mentioned, in general terms, the ftate of the Britifh nation hi 1763 and 1783, at the conclufion of the two wars. Within that fhort period, we have feen the moft aftonifhing events and revolutions in Europe, Afia, and Ameri- ca, that the hiftory of mankind can produce in fo limited a fpace of time. We have alfo feen evidence of the difcovery of new countries, new people, new planets ; and the difcoveries in fcience and philofophy are fuch as the human mind had hitherto no con- ception of. In fhort, the hiftory of politics, com- merce, religion, literature, and manners, during this fhort period, opens a rich field for the genius of the hiftorian and philofopher. The brief chronicles of the day are only fuited to record flriking facts. I mean, at prefeut, but fhortly to give a few parti- culars relpecting the political ftate of Britain at the conclufion of the wars 1763 and 1783. To fome this view, perhaps, will be difpleafing, becaufe it is not flattering ; but, if it is true, it calls for reflection, and exertion. IN 1763 Britain was in her meridian glory ; fhe was crowned with victory, rich with conqueft, mi- O 2 ftrefs io8 .FUGITIVE PIECES. ftrefs of the feas, and held the balance of power in Europe. IN 1783 The fun of Britain's glory (tp ufe Ljord Chatham's words) is fet. She is returned from an unfuccefsful war loaded with debt, but after the no- bleft ftruggle againft the moft ungenerous combina- tion of powerful foes which the world ever faw *. In this ftruggle her own children bore a principal part againft her ; while faction and divided councils at home contributed to her want of fuccefs. Her command of the fea is diiputed, and the balance qjf power is wrefted from her hands. IN 1763 The Britifh dominions in America extended from the North Pole, or, to narrow the view, from the northern parts of Hudibn's Bay to Cape Florida a ftretcjj of continent of 2500 miles, extending from the frozen to the torrid zone. IN 1783 The Britifh dominions in America are confined to the northern provinces of Canada and part of Nova Scotia, with the lejjer divifton of three great lakes ; the proud Britifh nation having been ftripped of all the reft by the machinations of an. American Printer y but a Philosopher ! * Britain, unaflifted, fuflained this war againft France, Spain, Holland, America, and the Eaft Indian tribes, fo that 10^000,909 niay be faid to have fooght againft 60,000,000 of people, opulent and powerful in the world ! FUGITIVE PIECES. 109 IN 1763 The Britim conquefts in Afia were al- fo rapid, rich, and extenfive. She foon pofleffed more territory in Alia than the kingdoms of France and Britain put together ; and Oriental Monarchs owned her dominion. J N ! 783 The Britim have been unfuccefsful, and were on the point of being {tripped of all their rich pofleilions in the Eaft, IN 1763 The mares of the Eaft India Company ftock fold from 260!. to 275!. per cent, fo flourish* ing were the British affairs in the Eaft, IN 1783 The Eaft India Company were term- ed Bankrupts in the Britifh Parliament ; and the ftock, which was 275!. fell to u81. per cent. IN 1763 The national debt of Britain amount- ed to 140,000,000!. JN 1785 The national debt is reckoned above 272,000,000!. a fum which the human mind can hardly form an idea of. To give fome affift- ance to conceive it : Were it to be Lid down in guineas in a line it would extend upwards of 4300 miles in length : Were it to be paid in fhillings, it would extend three times and a half round the globe : And, if paid in folid filvcr, would require 60,400 horfes to draw it, at the rate of fifteen hundred weight to each horfe, IN jio FUGITIVE PIECES. IN 1763 The annual national intereft was 4,688,177!. us. IN 1783 The annual national intereft and ex- penditure is above 15,000,000!. or 41,000!. daily; for which every article of life and commerce is hea- vily taxed, and Britain alone bears the burden. This daily intereft would require a pcrfon a day to count it out, at the rate of 60 guineas every minute inceflantly, which no one could do. IN 1763 The 3 per cent,confols were fold from 93!. to 95!. per cent, INI 783 The fame Government fund was as low as 53!. per cent. IN 1753 The Britifh empire was great, power* ful| and extenfive, and harmony reigned through all its branches. IN 1783 The empire is difmembered; Ameri- ca, by fuccefsful rebellion, is independent, and fe- parated from Britain ; Ireland, in the hour of di- flrefs, took the opportunity of laying the fame claim to independence j Scotland has remained loyal and attached, has fupplied the armies and navies, and iilently bears her fhare of debt and misfortune. WHEN the reader has made this furvey, he will probably think that virtue and induftry will be ne- ceflary FUGITIVE PIECES. nf ceffary to retrieve the affairs of Britain, and to ren- der her happy and refpectable, if not proud and triumphing. Let him then caft an eye to the mo- tives that influence political conduct, to the characters of the great, to the manners of the capital, and of the people in general ; and let him fay if he difco* vers public and private virtue flourifhing ; if he per- ceives humility, oeconomy, moderation ; or if he difcovers felfiflmefs, luxury, fupinenefs, and vicious indulgence of every kind. Does he fee the amor pa- trio: glow with purity and ardour in the breafts of Britifh Senators ? Is faction and party loft in united exertions for the good of the whole ? Or, are wealth and power the fole objects of ambition ? Are our young men in general trained to manly thinking, and manly virtues, with a contempt for low plea- fures and vice ? Or, are intemperance, fenfuality, and diffipation, from an early period, the objects of pur- fuit ? Look to their converfation, and their conduct, and fay if ever a nation of abandoned voluptuaries rofe to happinefs and greatnefs ? Is this the time when it may be faid of Britain, that all her fons are brave, and all her daughters virtuous ?" THEOPHRASTUS. E. C, [Th without the aid either of a mafter, or of books, made n great progrefs in geometry. While yet a boy, he had made difcoveries in the mathematics, which were the admiration of the ableft philofophers in France. He faw the demonstration of the moft in- tricate problems as it were intuitively, and without the neceflity of ufing a progreflive chain of reafon- ing. The learned men of the age prognofticated the greateft difcoveries for the improvement of fci- ence, and the benefit of mankind, from the matured U abilities 154 FUGITIVE PIECES. abilities of this furprifing youth. At the age of twenty-four, upon reading fome books of devotion, the mind of Pafcal underwent a wonderful revolu- tion. His fitter, Madame Perrier, who has written his life, informs us, that, from that time, he confi- dered every worldly purfuit as unworthy of a Chri- ftian ; and laid down a folemn refolution to devote the remainder of his life to religion alone. THE firft fruits of his extraordinary piety mani- fefted themfelves on occafion of a certain philofo- phical lecturer, who, in fome theological dilputations, had ventured to aflert that there was a difference in the corporeal nature of our Saviour, from the flefh and blood of ordinary men. Pafcal's confcience com- pelled him immediately to lodge an information a- gainft this heretic with the Archbifhop of Rouen. The lecturer, to fave himfelf from the vengeance of the Church, publicly recanted his errors, which was a great triumph to all good Catholics. THE next ftriking manifeftation of the zeal of Pafcal, was the convincing a young and beautiful fi- ter, of the finfulnefs of this world and its vanities ; and making her believe there was the higheft merit in fhutting herfelf up in a monaftery. She entered accordingly into one of the moft auftere and rigid difcipline, where her conftitution warring with her piety, yielded, at length, to the feverities which fhe pra&ifed ; and fhe died at the age of 36. MADAME FUGITIVE PIECES. 155 MADAME PERKIER proceeds to inform us, that the young Pafcal, from the moment of his conceiving thefe thoughts of the excellence of religion, laid it down as a fixed principle to renounce every grati- fication in life : Although bred up with delicacy, and amidft opulence, he now refufed the affiftance of a fervant in the performance of any thing which he could do for himfelf : He would not fuffer his bed to be made, nor his dinner to be brought him: When the calls of hunger became too importunate, he went to the kitchen, and haftily fatisfied them with any thing he could find : To have a choice in his food appeared to him the vileft fenfuality. He fpent his whole time in prayer, and in the reading of the Scriptures. THE biographer of Pafcal tells us, that his confti- tution was fo utterly debilitated and worn out by the rigour of his life, and the privation of all the amufe- ments cuftomary to youth, that he became the mar- tyr of difeafe before he was thirty years of age. His phyficians endeavoured now to difluade him from thofe aufterities which he practifed, by reprefenting to him the danger which his health underwent, and the abfolute neceflity of making that (for fome time at leaft) the chief object of his care. But his fitter, the Nun, who was in a fimilar fituation, returned the kind offices he had fhown to her, by convincing him that his fpiritual health was an object of infi- nitely higher importance : That he ought to proceed oourageoufly in the courfe in which he was now en- U * gaged j i S 6 FUGITIVE PIECES. gaged ; for that God certainly deftined him for a ftate of much greater perfection than what he had yet attained to. Thefe good counfels ftrengthened his pious refolutions ; and, from that time, all earth- ly objects appeared to him utterly vain and frivolous, and he gave himfelf up, without referve, to the care of liis eternal welfare. AT this time, the extraordinary fanctity of his character occafioned him frequent vifits from many pious perfons of great rank, who wifhed to be edi- fied by his counfels and converfation. In thefe vi- fits he had great fatisfaction, from confidering the advantage that might thence accrue to the caufe of religion ; but he began to fear, left a motive of va- nity, which he was confcious had fome fhare in this gratification, fhould be ofFenfive in the fight of God. He foon found, fays his fifter, a remedy for that. He put round his naked body an iron girdle, full of fharp points, and whenever a vain thought came acrofs his imagination, he ftruck the girdle with his elbow, fo as to force the points into his fleih, and this quickly brought him back to a proper eftimation of himfelf. This practice he perfevered in till his death. About four years before that period, his in- firmities and bodily complaints increafed to fuch a height, that he could neither follow, as ufual, his re- ligious ftudies, nor afiift others as he was wont. This fituation, however, was very profitable to him- felf ; for the patience with which he endured his fufferings made him the more acceptable to his Crea- tor, FUGITIVE PIECES. 157 tor, and the maxim which he inviolably purfued, of refilling every thing that was agreeable to his fenfes, fitted him for that fuperior and extatic enjoyment for which alone he panted. He continued in the mean time, in a moft angelic manner, to mortify his natural appetites and the calls of his fenfes. He made it a rule to fwallow his victuals without chew- ing them, left they fhould afford any gratification to his palate ; for the fame reafon, when taking medi- cines, he always preferred thofe that were moft nau- feous. " Mortification and affliction," he would frequently fay, " is the condition in which a Chri- ftian ought to pafs his life. How happy is it then for me to be reduced by neceffity to that falutary condition !" Thus he continued, fays his lifter, ad- vancing daily in perfection and fpiritual health, as his bodily conftitution declined, till at length, in a fit of convulfion, which was miraculoufly fufpended for a few minutes, while he received the viaticum and extreme unction, in the thirty-ninth year of his age, he died. ON this picture, and the contraft which it forms to that contained in my former letter, it is not ne- cefiary to make many reflections. Two very oppo- fite characters are delineated in thefc letters ; yet both acting upon the fame principle, a defire of re- gulating their life according to what they believe to be the will of their Creator. See the country cler- gyman, a man of plain common fenfe, without pre- tenfion to talents or to fuperiority of intellect, in- ftilling i 5 8 FUGITIVE PIECES. Hilling into his flock the love of the Supreme Being, as the Father of mercies, delighted with the happi- nefs of his creatures. Behold him, with heartfelt delight, difcharging the duties which he owes to fociety, as a hufband, a father, and a friend. The innocent enjoyment of life he reprefents as a duty of religion. Happy in himfelf, he diffufes happinefs on all around him. View next the celebrated Paf- cal Endowed by nature with a genius to enlighten and improve mankind, to advance the glory of God, by contributing to the good of fociety he conceives that mortification is neceffary for his foul's welfare. He believes it an aft of piety to extinguilh in the breaft of a fifter the voice of nature urging to the blifsful duties of a wife and of a mother, and exults in the thought that the i.aufterities which fhortened her life were the price of her eternal falvation. Pur- fuing for himfelf the fame courfe, he folicits pain and affliction, becomes the voluntary victim of incu- rable difeafe, and dies, for the glory of God, a pre* mature death. WHO can hefrtate a moment to determine which of thefe men entertains the moft worthy ideas of the Divine Being ? Who will hefitate to exclaim, " If Religion is amiable, what a hideous monfter is Fa- caticifm !" E U S E B I U S. E. C. [This FUGITIVE PIECES. 159 [This fubject was continued in the two following Letters, in anfwer to EUSEBIUS.] LETTER I. S I R, J. PERCEIVE the communication I lately fent you has occafioned two very well written and well in- tended letters from EUSEBIUS. The fentiments I gave you under the accidental fignature of PASCAL, on the moral tendency of the ftrict obfervance of Sunday, were from the hand-writing of the late in- genious Lord Kames. I thought they did great ho- nour to his memory, and I was happy to have the opportunity of making them known to the public, although I only mentioned him by the way, as a phi- lofopher, a critic, and a friend to fociety. No man will deny him the character ; for the public fpirit which animated all his refearches, his various erudi- tion, and the perfevering induftry he exerted for the inftruction of the age, amidft the duties of an im- portant function, and the multiplied occupations of an active private life, entitle his memory to the moft honourable applaufe. I faid, that the reflections of fuch men, in the calm hours of retirement, are al- ways to be regarded as precious ; for from them we may look for obfervation, truth, and good fenfe. But it has been referved for EUSEBIUS to term the ferious ido FUGITIVE PIECES. ferious fenfible fentiments of Lord Karnes fanatical. Could his Lordfhip raife his head from the grave, what would his aftonifliment be, and how would his cotemporaries ftare, at the quick traniltion of opi- nions in the world which they lately left ! LORD KAMES fays, " Sunday is a day of reft from worldly concerns, in order to be more ufefully employed upon thofe that are internal." He con- demns diverfion or merriment, or whatever tends to diffipate or diftract the thoughts on that day, which ought to be paffed in moral improvement and felf- examination. And will not every perfon praclifing this, find themfelves better men and better Chrifti- ans ? Yet this rational and folidly fenfible opinion is, by EUSEBIUS, thought to befanaticifm. From this one is naturally led to enquire whztfatiaticifm means ? and, upon examination, it will be found to refemble Pope's defcription of the north. Afk where's the north? At York, 'tis on the Tweed ; I Scotland, at the Drcades ; and there, At Greenland, Zembla, or the Lord knows where. EVERY perfon, according to his own fyftem of indulgence, terms the perfon obferving a purer fyf- tem of conduct a fanatic. The grofs voluptuary, in- dulging in lawlefs fenfuality, terms the man of mo- deration and morality, who fcruples at adls of in- temperance, a fanatic. The perfon who obferves the external forms of religion, to quiet a ftupid con- fcience, although fecretly practifmg the grofleft vices, FUGITIVE PIECES. 161 vices, terms the man who openly endeavours at pu- rity of heart and conduct, a fanatic. In fhort, every perfon who rifes above another, in moral rectitude, is (now-a-days), by the inferior, termed a fanatic : and fanaticifm is applied, from the loweft degree of brutal debafement, to each fuperior clafs, as they rife towards moral perfection. EUSEBIUS contrails Lord Kames's opinion of the tendency of the ftrict obi ervance of Sunday, with a Sunday he palled (as he fays) hi Weftmoreland. EUSEBIUS telis us of a parfon, the very picture of fat contented ignorance fmiling on the earth, (who probably never exifled but in his own brain) that en- joyed a fmoking lirloin on Sundays, and drank good ale-, whofe doctrine to his flock was, "See the inferior animals, not bleffed with reafon ; they frifk and play, devour their pafture, and follow their inftincts, and are happy j therefore, why fhould man, who is of a fupeiior nature, not enjoy what is fet before him ?" that is, why fhould not man, endued with reafon, enlightened by revelation, accountable for every thought, word, and action, and whofe higheft mo- ral attainments fall fhort of his duty, not be a beafr, or indulge as much as they ? AFTER the account of this edifying fermon, and the comfortable dinner, we are told of the parfon's walking out to diftribute the picked bones of the fir- loin, and of his parifhioners gamboling and dancing in merriment on the green. The parfon, it is faid, X approved i6 2 FUGITIVE PIECES. approved of the exercife, trujtlng they were inno- cently employed. To have completed the pious in- nocent day, his Reverence fhould have joined the groupe in the country dance, and then he would have exhibited the character of a perfett clergyman in the opinion of EUSEBIUS. To fum up the whole picture, it would then ftand thus : On Sunday to teach his flock to follow nature, and carefully ob- ferve the beafts of the field as their example, and be thankful. After this inftructing difcovery, to go to the parfonage houfe, and eat fmoking beef, quaff ale, and take a pipe. In the evening to fee his pari- ihioners dance ; and, no doubt, afterwards, with his family, to take a rubber at whift, or a pool at qua- drille. The whole of the day's tranfactions would be fandtified by the jolly parfon's faying, at theclofe, " Ihe Lord be praifed The earth is full of the good" nefi of the Lord" MAY fuch clergymen, however, as EUSEBIUS'S parfon, be long kept from being the fpiritual guides of Scotland. When the clergy become, either by precept or example, the means of relaxing the morals, or flattering the follies and vices of the people, a fpeedy inlet muft follow to barbarifm, ig- norance, and crimes. THE contraft in the fecond letter of EUSEBIUS, of Blaife Pafca/ t who carried mortification to an ex- treme degree, has no connection with the rational piety contained in the quotation from Lord Kames, FUGITIVE PIECES. 163 on the importance to the individual, and to fociety, of keeping Sunday religioufly, therefore cannot here be taken notice of. It may, with truth, however, be affirmed, that no perfon can read the writings of Pafcal without admiration and improvement. I fliall, for once more, affume the fignature. PASCAL. E. C. LETTER II. S I R, OOME papers which you lately inferted concerning the obfervation of Sunday, have led me to offer you a few remarks upon that fubject. IN this age of extreme politenefs, when fafhion denominates every thing ferious fanatical^ it is pof- fible that fome, with a faftidious glance and ^n in- terjection to this effect, may pafs on to another part of the paper. But we are not all of this clafs j many of us love to have a little of the ufeful mixed with the amufing, and will not think a corner of a Sa- turday's paper ill employed in recommending a de- cent regard to the Sunday. I, among others, was exceedingly gratified by the fragment which you lately inferted from the pa- pers of a late eminent Philofopher and Judge of this X 2 country 164 FUGITIVE PIECES. country upon that fubject. Your correfpondent, who favoured you with this communication, is en- titled to the thanks of every friend to fociety ; for the fentiments of Lord Kames, in favour of religious duty, will have weight with many, who either do not often hear, or pay but little regard to the ad- monitions of profeffional teachers. BUT I am not a little at a lofs to conceive what good end your other correfpondent could propofe to himfelf, firft, by his tale of an Englifh parfon (bor- rowed, I fuppofe, at leaft in part, from Goldfmith's Vicar of Wakefield), who vindicated his parifhion- ers in devoting Sunday afternoons to public fports ; and then, by the difmal picture of fanaticifm exhi- bited in the example of the good but mifguided Pafcal. PRAY, has this age any tendency to fanaticifm, or do the manners of the times indicate a difpofition to obferve the Sabbath with a judaical rigour ? If your correfpondent has any fears upon this head, let him only obferve the ftreets of the metropolis, or of almoll: any other great town, upon Sunday evenings, and he will foon be cured. But the fpirited and juft animadversions of PASCAL fave me the trouble of beftowing farther attention upon Eu- SEBIUS. WHAT I wifli your readers to be perfuaded of i?, that the Sabbath is really of divine inftitution ; and that, FUGITIVE PIECES. 165 that, although it were not, its beneficial confequen- ces to fociety are fo obvious and fo great, as to re- commend its religious obfervance to every friend to virtue. THAT a certain portion of our time is due to the worfhip of our Creator, and to preparation for that endlefs ftate of being to which the current of time is faft carrying all of us, is a dictate of reafon, it is founded in man's condition and profpedls, and is in- deed a felf-evident propofition : But reafon could not have certainly told what particular portion of time ought to be fet apart for thefe purpofes ; upon this point the opinions of mankind would have been widely different ; oppoflte and interfering practices would have been obferved j and, confequently, the obfervation of a day of religious reft prevented or defeated. Revelation, therefore, interpofes, and tells mankind that it is the will of the Supreme Le- giflator, that one day in feven be confecrated to him ; it tells us, moreover, that this was an original law given to man upon his creation. Vid. Gen. ii. 3. Of fuch a law, many traditionary evidences are preferved in heathen writers, as well as in the pofl- tive teftimony of Scripture hiftory. IT is an egregious miftake, therefore, to date this inftitution from the promulgation of the Mofaic osco- nomy. The fourth commandment contained no- thing more than a republication and enforcement of the original ftatute. This is evident from the very enacting 166 FUGITIVE PIECES. enacting words of that law" Remember the Sab- bath day to keep it holy" It is impoffible for men to remember what they have not previoufly learned. WHEN we come down to the Chriftian difpenfa- tion, we find that it interferes no farther, with re- ipect to this inftitution, than to authorife a change upon the day of the week for its obfervance. In grateful commemoration of our Saviour's refurrec- tion, the firft, in place of the feventh, became the Chriftian Sabbath ; and they who ferioufly reflect upon the importance of that event, will fcarcely fail to acknowledge the propriety as well as obligation of the change. Still the fpirit and object of the ori- ginal laws are preferved by the gofpel ; for a feventh part of our time is required to be fet apart for the fervice of our Creator, and the duties of religion : But a controverfy upon this particular point is unne- cefTary 5 for, if men will only allow that a feventh part of our time fhould be obferved as a Sabbath, they will feel but little difpofition to quarrel about the particular day of the week to be fet apart for that end. IF it is evident then that the Sabbath is of divine inftitution, where is the clergyman, or any other man, who can produce a warrant for devoting any part of that day to public fports and recreations ? In the law of God, I find fix days allotted to man for the purpofes of a prefent life, whether of health or bufinefs; but the feventh, in terms moft pointed and FUGITIVE PIECES. 167 and exprefs, fet apart for God. To devote any part of that day, therefore, to public diverfions, can ap- pear, to a ferious mind, in no other light, than a de- figned infult upon the Majefty of,Heaven. BY fome foreign nations, indeed, the Sabbath is differently computed from what is in this country. Some reckon from mid-day to mid-day, and fome from evening to evening. If a feventh part of our time, whatever may be the hourof its commence- ment, is confecrated as a facreflreft, the object of the divine law is fulfilled. IN Britain, we reckon from midnight till mid- night : This, therefore, is our Sabbath ; and this, if we are to follow, not the dictates of our own incli- nation or fancy, but the law of our Maker, we muft confecrate to his fervice, from which the purpofes of charity and mercy can never be excluded. THIS dodlrine will, to fome of your fafhionable readers, appear harfh and fevere j but it is the doc- trine of the word of God, which will not bend in ac- commodation to our changing opinions. If they are determined, therefore, to make no difference be- twixt Sundays and other days, except in dedicating the former to fuperior exceffes of luxury and enjoy- ment, let them boldly fhake off all the reftraints of a religious profeffion declare revelation to be a fic- tion a future ftate a chimera and their own tafte and 168 FUGITIVE PIECES. and inclination their only ftandards of propriety in conduct. I think it not impoffible, however, independent of all religious confiderations, to fhew that the de- cently religious obfervance of Sunday is neither fo bad nor fo unpleafant a thing as falhionable people are apt to imagine : That many moil beneficial con- fequences refult from it : That its neglect has given rife to moft unhappy effects upon fociety ; and that, to this caufe in particular, is, in a great meafure, to be afcribed the ignorance, diffipation, and profiiga* cy of the prefent times. PHILO-SABBATICUS. E. C. Dcxftrlna vim promovet infitam, Re///, o 2 One fide, one pound of fmall potatoes, o o On the other fide, pickled cabbage, o 04 Fifh removed, two larks, plenty of crumbs, o i~ Mutton removed, French roll boiled for pud- ding, o o{- Parfley for garnifh, - - o oi o 7 THE FUGITIVE PIECES. 187 THE dinner was ferved up on china, looked light, tafty, and pretty the table fmall, and the difhes well proportioned. WE hope each new married lady will keep this as a lefTon ; it is worth knowing how to ferve up feven difhes, confifting of a difh of fi{h, joint of mutton, couple of fowls, pudding, vegetables, and fauce, for feven pence. E. C. S I R, JL O U have informed us that a Reverend clergy- man has lately received an appointment in America. Pray, Sir, is this the fame perfon whofe letter 'ad- drefred to Dr Wotheripoon I lately read ? If it is, I congratulate Scotland on his departure, and I fhall pity America on his arrival. Is this the man who encourages our youth to emigration, and advifes the Rev. Dr Wotherfpoon to banifh the poor Loyalifts, " thefe vipers in your bofom," as he calls them, and fays, " make them the firft exports of your trade ?" Good God, what can equal the barbarity of fuch a fentiment ! Shall thefe unhappy fufferers in the un- fuccefsful caufe of the rights of their mother-coun- try in the defence of the principles of equity, and of that juft, mild, and equal government, which ex- A a 2 tended 188 FUGITIVE PIECES. tended to every branch of the empire, protection, law, and liberty, be devoted to exile and flavery ! Forbid it Heaven ! forbid it every principle of hu- manity ! Is it thus he would bind up the broken- hearted, and comfort them that have no friend ? Is this the language of the mild precepts of the gofpcl, whofe doctrines he profefTes to teach, or of the meek and humble JESUS, the Saviour of mankind, who faid to his fervants, " Love your enemies Do good to them that hate you BlefTed are the peace-ma- kers, for they fhall be called the children of God." Does the Chriftian religion breathe the fpirit of ran- cour, malice, and revenge ? If it does, then, is this man a teacher of the the gofpel ? YE poor unhappy Loyalifts, have ye not fuftercd. enough ! Is the meafure of your misfortunes not yet full ? and muft the laft bitter dregs be poured into the cup of your fufferings by the hand of a Chri- ftian Divine ? Where will you find a good Samari- tan ? for, alas ! this Levite, not like his brother of old, content to turn aiide an indifferent head, points a fword to rip up your yet uncloied wounds. Be- reaved of property, and of every comfort in life, for your fteady attachment to your duty, your King and your country, you muft yet fuffer greater ills ! Ba- nifiied from your friends and connections, with bleeding hearts and mangled limbs, you muft be fent to tread the barren wild, or feek the inhofpi- table fhore, without profpeft of peace till you fhall reach that haven where the weary arc at reft ! Tins is FUGITIVE PIECES. 189 is the doom affigned you by one who fliould fpeak the language of peace ; but, it would feem, the gall of afps is within him. Follow not his example ; but " pray for them that perfecute and defpitefully ufe you." Remember the words of the poet " Should Fate command me to the fartheft verge " Of the green earth to diflant barbarous climes " Rivers unknown to fong ; where firfl. the Sun " Gilds Indian mountains, or his fetting beam " Flames on the Atlantic ifles ; 'tis nought to me, " Since GOD is ever prefent ever felt " In the void vrafte as in the city full ; " And where HE vital breathes there muft be joy." MAY the confolations of Heaven fupportyou, and mitigate your forrows Many a heart feels for your unhappy fituation, and commiferates your diftrefs ; for we are not all fo flinty as this Reverend Dodlor. May your new vifitor's appointment be in the remote fettlements, where the fierce Indians will teach him a leffon of humanity. A Friend to the Unfortunate. E. C. SIR, ipo FUGITIVE PIECES. S I R, AMIDST the general difcontent at the taxes, you feem uninformed of the moft ferious of any yet announced. It is faid with confidence that a ge- neral combination is forming among the BACHE- LORS of the two kingdoms to petition Parliament for a repeal of their tax. Circular letters will foon be iflfued, calling meetings over the whole ifland. It is meant to reprefent, that it is partial, unjitft y and oppre/Jive, to tax Bachelors, unlefs Government had furniftied them with a lift of fuch females as are entitled to be honourably addrefled ; for, if their characters are as much difguifed as their bodies, by the prefent fnfhionable drefles, thofe are moft fortu- nate who have the leaft connexion with them. THE prayer of the petition, it is faid, is to be, (f That a lift be forthwith made out of all the wor- thy virgin fpinfters within the feveral parifh.es ; and of the widows of honourable character, under a cer- tain age, in a feparate column : That attention may be paid to exclude from faid lift all known and pro- fefled courtezans ; and ftill more, thofe of a much worfe character, who, with apparent virtue, are flily vicious, and to criminality add deceit! That all fcolds vixens profufe fquanderers gadabouts Jlat- terns gamblers and fuch as are fond of cordials, be arranged under proper heads. IF FUGITIVE PIECES. 191 IF this is granted, it is faid, the Bachelors will voluntarily offer to arrange their corps alfo under different heads, as thofe of acknowledged merit fortune idlers drunkards -fops fribbles gamefters blackguards^ and -fuch as quietly live the life of beajls. IT is thought this petition will occafion a very warm and long debate. Government will fupport the tax, and the Premier's being a Bachelor will ftrike the majority of the Houfe with the fenfe, that it was public-fpirited and difinterefted in the Mini- fter to bring it forward. The next fpeaker, on the fame fide, Avill probably fay That the reafons fet forth in the petition are altogether nugatory , that he is free to fay that there is a reciprocity in the mat- ter that muft ftrike every one, and deferves the at- tention of the Houfe : That, for his part, if women are fo vicious that men will not marry, it is wife in Government to make private vice a public benefit. The exigencies of Government muft be fupplied ; and, for his part, hefcouted the motion. A mem- ber of the Oppofition Bench will probably rife. He is aftonifhed to hear fuch bold afTertion, without the fhadow of argument The petitioners are an aggrie- ved fet of people They are a numerous, a wealthy, a refpectable body ; and, whether he had any con- nection or not with fuch an honourable clafs of men, he would unawed candidly fpeak his mind upon the fubjecl: He thought the petitioners were well found- ed in their oppofition to the tax The fex he knew too I 9 2 FUGITIVE PIECES. too well < (a -loud laugh) Were men breathing the fpirit of liberty confcious of their noble inde- pendence, to be taxed into flavery the worft the moft debafing flavery forced by the minifter of the day into the infupportable chains of matrimony. Delicacy forbids him to ufe ftrong language. What heart that felt as a man would not repel fuch pro- ceeding ? But an Honourable Gentleman on the op- pofite fide of the Houfe had faid, If things are fo, why fhould not Government make private vices, pu- blic benefit ? Who that hears this does not fmile with contempt : I will not enlarge on it : His Ma- jefty's Minifters fhould therefore increafe the vice, that all men, for the public benefit, may remain Bachelors. He heartily wiihed the petition fuccefs, and hoped every unbiased member would give it his fupport. AFTER this, probably, a defultory converfation will take place. Some new members alking queftions for information fome perfonalities, noway connect- ed with the fubjecl: of debate, and then explanations being made, the tax, without a divifion, will remain as it did. I am, &c. SPECULATOR. E. C. SIR, FUGITIVE PIECES. 193 SIR, Ed'm. Nov. 27. 1784. A F T E R a residence of many years abroad, I am now returned to my native country, with a de- cent competency, and intend to fettle as a domeftic man, if I can find a woman to my liking. I have often heard matrimonial advertifements ridiculed ; but I know two of the happieft matches, perhaps, in the ifland, which were formed by a letter in the newfpapers ; and I therefore take the liberty of writing you on this fubject. To me the fociety here is now quite different from what it was my old connections are gone a new race appears, to whom I am a flranger ; and, let me tell you, female man- ners, from the little I have feen, are very different from what I left them ; and it is a long time before one can find out characters. Upon thefe accounts, allow me to convey a few lines through the channel of your paper, refpecling what I am, and what the woman muft be that I would wifh to marry. I received a ftrictly virtuous and exemplary edu- cation ; thanks to my worthy parents, now in Hea- ven. I went from the univerfity at nineteen, and have returned at thirty-fix, in good health and fpi- rits. I was turned out on the world with a good education, good principles, and a hundred pounds in my pocket. I am come back, I hope, with im- provement, and can afford to fpend 6ool. a-year. B b I was i 9 4 FUGITIVE PIECES. I was educated a Preibyterian, but am no bigot j for, where the principles are good, and the heart is fincerej external form, in my opinion, is of little confequence. My religion is that of the New Tefta- ment fairly interpreted. MY education, before I launched into the world, gave me a tafte for reading and inquiry, which kept me out of many a fcene of extravagance, folly, and diffipation. This tafte I ftill retain ; and I prefer the company of humble worth to that of fplendid vice of rational domeftic comfort to fhowy infig- nifkance. MY ftature is about the middle fize, being about five feet eight inches, and not too corpulent in my own opinion : My complexion rather dark, from long refidence in a warm climate, but which a winter in Scotland may perhaps bleach a little. My friends are kind enough to fay I am good-natured and cheerful ; and they have always courted my company. Now let me mention what kind of woman I would wifh to wed. I care not for fortune, provi- ded Ihe can accommodate herfelf to my income ; but, if with fortune, ihe poileiTcs the other requi- fites that follow, fo much the better. I would have her the daughter of a virtuous, attentive, fenlible mother ; for I hold mothers to be the beft or worft members of fociety, according as they do their du- ty. One virtuoufly and religioufly educated ; for FUGITIVE PIECES. 195 women cannot have too much religion, if it is ac- companied with good fenfe. I would wifh her to be fo well informed as to make a convertible com- panion j but {he muft not have been an indifcrimi- nate reader, efpecially at circulating libraries, as I would not have her mind either corrupted or giddy with extravagant views of life. I would have her accuftomed to flmple, chafle, and elegant manners ; not pofTeffing the half-breeding of vulgar opulence, nor ufed to the free manners of diffipated high life. I would rather look for her in the bofom of retire- ment, practifing every domeftic virtue and amiable accomplishment, than in the haunts of diffipation, gaiety, and folly. I would wifh her to poflefs rather a mild and gentle temper than a quick and very live- ly difpolition ; as this laft, if it has not been duly attended to, generally degenerates into flippancy and pertnefs. I would wifh her to be amiable, not witty j all her actions indicating a well-turned and delicate mind, with kind affections. WITH regard to her appearance, I would rather have it what is called agreeable than beautiful ; her ftature not too tall ; her age from twenty to thirty. IF any of your correfpondents can aid me to fuch a perfon, or inform how I can get acquainted, I fhall be infinitely obliged to them. Their letters fhall be thankfully received, duly anfwered, and their correfpondence treated with the ftricteft ho- nour and fecrecy. Let me take the liberty of de- firing 196 FUGITIVE PIECES. firing them to be put under cover to you, with a di- rection to A S I A T I C U S. E. C. [It would appear that feveral letters had been recei- ved in anfwer to the above, from the following being foon after printed.] SIR, Edin. Dec. n. JL AM much obliged to you for the infertion of my letter of Nov. 27. and for the punctuality in tranf- mitting your communications, many of which were elegant and fatisfactory. By your means I have been introduced to the cor/efpondence of LAURA, whofe character, manners, and accomplifhments, lead me to the moft flattering profpects of happi- nefs. 4 SHE fully anfwers the defcription I gave of the woman to be wifhed for as the companion for life j and I am happy to fay, from the intelligence I have received, that there are many fuch left. BY being fo long a ftranger to my native country, I was led to a mode of application which would per-, haps, be reckoned uncommon, but I hope it was by FUGITIVE PIECES. 197 none deemed indelicate. I gave afTurance of the ftricteft honour, which fhall be inviolably preferved. Were fuch a method more frequently practifed, it might be the means of bringing many worthy cha- racters together, whofe minds are fitted for each other, but whom accident or unacquaintance keep afunder. I have feveral acquaintances, richer and more deferving than myfelf, but fimilar in other re- fpedts, whom I fhall advife to follow my example. May it be their lot, by difcriminating characters, to efcape the worthlefs, and gain the amiable. A S I A T I C U S, E. C. S I R, JL H E account in a late paper of a young woman having taken poifon, or died in confequence of a difappointment in marriage, is truly affecting and melancholy, and affords a very inftructive leflbn to the female fex. You have informed us (and I know it to be a fact), that the young pair went to be mar- ried, but having neglected to procure the neceffary certificate, the clergyman, very properly, refufed to perform the ceremony. The young couple, howe- ver, refolving to be man and wife from that time, went together, and agreed to adjuft matters of form the io8 FUGITIVE PIECES. the next day ; but when the day appeared, the man refufed to fulfil the engagement. THIS tranfa&ion is worthy of fome reflections, which, perhaps, may be ufeful to ibciety. IT may be afkeu, what is the feeling of every ho- neft and virtuous mind, on reading the above nar- rative ? It will probably be, that of pity and com- panion for the unfortunate young woman ; particu- larly fo, as the event ftrongly proves that me muft, before this incident, have been virtuous and defer- ving. Had fhe been of a loofe or worthlefs charac- ter fuch fenfibility to fhame fuch attachment iiich anguifh of mind, would not have appeared. WHILE we feel pity for her, we alfo feel indigna- tion againft the man who occafioned her untimely end. No man of honefry and fenfibility of heart would have afted (b difhonourable a part, or led a virtuous young woman into fuch a fituation. True love, which muft be founded on efteem, is diftant, bafhful,refpetful, and incapable of injuring the ob- ject of attachment. Libertinifm is deceitful, brutal, impudent, and will afiume any difguife to betray, and will afterwards triumph and reproach. Of this laft defcription, it would feem, had been the atten- tion of the man to this poor unfortunate young wo- man : But there are many (and of her own fex too) who will condemn the girl only ; and fay fhe had herfelf to blame ! How cautious and guarded ought women FUGITIVE PIECES. 199 women to be refpecYing their conduct ! It is faid, " That the woman who deliberates is loft." If fhe even hefitate a moment refpecting the line of her duty, it may be expected fhe will fall into difhonour, contempt, and ruin. From the moment a woman permits familiarity, although not criminal, fhe finks in the eftimation of the man to whom fhe allows the freedpm, befides putting it in his power to expofe her to others ; and in the calm hour of reflection fhe is defpifed for the liberty fhe had granted. He fpurns at every idea of honourable connexion with fuch a perfon ; for fhe who will permit unbecoming freedom before marriage, it is reafonable to fuppofe, will not be very circumfpect after it ; and in no iitua- tion is the mind of man f b much awake to feniibility and delicacy, as rei peeling the character and conduct of the woman he wifhes to marry. IF a woman has ever gone beyond the bounds of delicacy and virtue, fhe never can expect to gain a hufband, but by appearing what fhe really is not. She then muft aiTume an artificial manner become a hypocrite a liar and a cheat j for fhe is con- fcious that no man worth the gaining would have taken her, if he had known circumftances. Her character is difguifed and defpicable ; and when dif- covered by the hufband, which, if he is a man even of very ordinary fenfe and obiervation, he foon will do (for an artificial manner cannot always be kept up) then farewell every profpect of domeftic tran- quillity and comfort ! The home which fhouldhave been aoo FUGITIVE PIECES. been to him a temple of peace, becomes the abode of torment The affection of her who fhould have foothed his cares is loft or defpifed, and mifery and anguifh drag to both a lengthening chain to the clofe of life ! Learn then, ye fair, the high importance, to yourfelves and to fociety, of modefty, circum- fpeclion, and delicacy in your deportment. It is melancholy to think what a number of naturally fine young creatures have baniihed themfelves for ever from every profpecl of domeftic comfort, and ren- dered themfelves outcafts of fociety by imprudence, bad companions, and inattention. How careful ought parents to be, to ftore the minds of their children with proper principles, and to confirm them by good example. At no time was fuch advice fo requifite as at prefent, when fo many of the young are familiar with vice fo early, and the bafeft means are ufed to corrupt the rifing generation. I fhall conclude with quoting the lines of a poet who knew the human character the fprings of ac- tion and the beft interefts of mankind in a very eminent degree. May they be indelibly fixed in eve- ry female breaft. Life fwarms with ills ; the boldeft are afraid ; Where then is fafety for a tender maid ? Unfit for conflid round befet with woes And man whom leaft fhe fears her worft of foes! When kind moft cruel ; when oblig'd the moft, The lead obliging ; and by favours loft. Cruel FUGITIVE PIECES. 201 Cr-uel by Nature, they for kindnefs hate ; And fcorn you, for thofe ills themfelves create. If, on your fame, our fex a blot has thrown, 'Twill ever flick, through malice of your own. Moft hard ! - In pleafing your chief glory lies ; And yet from pleafing your chief dangers rife : Then pleafe the beft ; and know, for men of fenfe, Your ftrongeft charms are native innocence. In fimple manners, all the fecret lies Be kind and virtuous you'll be bleft and wife. I am, Sir, your's, &c. Sept.. 25. 1784. HENRY. E. C. A Public Mafquerade was firft attempted in Edin- burgh in March 17 86, by the following advertife- ment. A MAS QJJ E R A D E. J . DUNN begs to inform the Nobility and Gentry, that there is to be a MASQUERADE in his rooms on Thurfday the 2(i of March next. The price of tick- ets one guinea to Gentlemen, and half-a-guinea to La- dies. N. B. The rooms in the Hotel will be fet apart for the different accommodation of the Ladies and Gentle- C c men, 202 FUGITIVE PIECES. men, with proper perfons for the purpofe of dr effing. . Refrejhments and wines, fiveatmeats, &c. &c. in the tea room. A band of rnitfic ivill attend \ and the 'whole will be conduced with the JlriEleJl regularity and deco- rum. A r Folly, Night t and Aurora. N. B. She had commiiEoned a Lucretia, but her correfpondent fays, no fuch character could be found at prefent in London FOR fuch ladies as chufe more fimple difguifes, fhe has provided Dominos, Jalou/les and alfo the fmal- ler articles of drefs, fuch as prominent Bofoms and Behinds, from the moft enormous to the moft mo- derate 5 and cool and airy mafks of all kinds. CONVENIENT rooms will be ready, adjoining to the mop, for adjufting ceremonies, and fettling plans, in cafe the apartments in the Hotel allotted for ac- commodation fhould be too much crouded. As the fole relifh of this rational and elegant entertainment depends uponfecrecy, cuftomers may be allured that effectual means will be taken that no perfon in one chamber lhall know what is going on in the next. SHE has alfo been folicited by feveral of her friends to commiffionGENTLEMENs MASKS ; but as fafhionable gentlemen at prefent require little addi- tional difguife in comparifon with the ladies, fhe will not 204 FUGITIVE PIECES, not boaft of the fame variety in this department. Thofe who have no characters to fupport (by much the greateft number, no doubt, upon fuch occafions), may be fupplied with various coloured Dominos. She has ordered a few excellent Devils mafks, with gilded horns a very good Don Quixote, with a fhi- ning Mambrino a young Bacchus, but as the cha- racter is fo common, particular decorations will be given Several running Footmen, Jcckies, Harle- quins, Chimney-fiveeps Many good drefTes for Sir Johns and Jackie Brutes Men Mid-wives, with circumstantial printed advertifements Calibans, Cu- pids, and jldonifes in abundance A very elegant drefs for Mad Tom, the blanket being worked like a modern fhawl, and the crown filled with goofe feathers in place of ftraw, the pole a Lochaber-axe A very good Knave of Clubs, and a Ninth of Dia- monds A very fine Dancing Bear, and Oran Outang, fitted to reprefent human nature either in its impro- ved upright ftate, or in its primitive, upon all fours N. B. with or without tails With many other ori- ginal characters too tedious to mention Enquire at the. warehoufe. A fine group, meant to reprefent an Excifeman tormenting a Landholder, a Diftiller, and a Farmer, accompanied with a John Bull laughing. IT is rumoured, that the MANAGER has been ap- plied to for drefTes ; but ladies and gentlemen are requefted to take notice, that they can only be fer- vcd, in this way, with frippery that has been expofed to public view thefe twenty years. FOR FUGITIVE PIECES. 205 * # * FOR particular friends, who may happen not to be prepared, fhe has provided fome excellent bon mots and repartees^ warranted not to be found in the jeft books. She makes a fpecial bargain, however, that (after being fpoken) they ihallnot be fent to the newfpapers, as flie forefees, from the advancing ftate of this country, that they may again be wanted, and injury might be done to her trade by publishing them. f This not to be repeated, as the advantage is clear- ly on the fide of the purchafer, and not of the feller i and the public ought to think themfelves much ob- liged to the advertifer for thisjing/e notice. E. C. [The 206 FUGITIVE PIECES. [The following letters appeared periodically in the Edinburgh Evening Courant.] LETTER I. Train up a child in the way he fhould go j and when he is old, he will not depart from it. SOLOMON* SIR, Feb. 1 8. 1786. IN compliance with the fafhion of effayifts, I beg leave to introduce myfelf to your acquaintance by a quotation from an antiquated author, of whom, by the way, I am no admirer, but my mind is of that affimilating nature, that it can draw nourifhment even from poifonous fources. You muft know, Sir, I look with a jealous eye to all periodical papers. The newfpapers that have been conducted by my fe- cret influence have always been the moft fuccefsful ; and the magazines which I patronife are the moft read. When the Lounger was announced, I confefs I was led by the title to hope that it would be a pu- blication fuited to my fentiments and opinions. I am forry, however, to fay that my hopes have been difappointed, and that it has hitherto been inimical to my views and wifh.es reflecting men and manners. Opinions, Sir, fhould vary, like all other things, with ihefa/liofiy and not be thrown out to ftem the tide of freedom and fafhionable enjoyments. You have fortunately lived, Sir, to fee an eafe of manners, and FUGITIVE PIECES. 207 a liberality of fentiment, pervade all ranks of fociety, which were hitherto unknown in your country.-^- People in Scotland formerly read, thought, and rea- foned too much ; which produced a certain ftrict- nefs of manners, and a cramped attention to deco- rum, which provoked me exceedingly. They would then talk of reftraints of duty, of moral obligation, and confcience, of decency and propriety of con- duct, and fuch like fluff. But now there is a hap- py thoughtlefs frivolity and eafe of manners introdu- ced, when people may do what they pleafe, and not be the worfe thought of by the world ; and this, Sir, let me tell you, is true liberality of mind. THERE was formerly a certain {lately dignity of character, that was above doing a mean or an im- moral action. The lines of duty, and the laws of decorum, were afcertained and attended to. But all this produced a kind of fliffnefs of manners, and of- ten prevented people from doing what they had an inclination to, very unfuitable to a pleafure-loving age. THERE was formerly a certain nothingnefs of cha- racter, which was defpifed in fociety, but which now, by a few eafy-attained fafhionable rules, and the purfuit of fafhionable pleafures, is highly raifed in the fcale of importance. Labour and fludy to ac- quire manly principles, ufeful knowledge, elegant manners and accomplifhments, are now unnecefiary. It mufl be allowed, that it is much eafier now to be 2o8 FUGITIVE PIECES, a gentleman than formerly ; and this, of itfelf, is ^ very great improvement. A late very elegant friend of mine has mown, that a perfon's whole life and conduct ought to be falfehood and deceit ; and if to this he can add bowing and flattery, he is a gentle- man to all intents and purpofes. But, however much a perfon may deferve the appellation of a liar, it muft not be told, without the offence being appeafed by blood. And I do not diflike this fafhion ; it keeps up good manners ; befides, as I am always glad to fee rny friends, I cannot be difpleafed if they fhould come to me before they were expected. I HAVE a ftrong affection for all mankind, and wifh to fee fociety conducted upon my plan. I mean to attempt this, Sir, by your means ; and fliall open my fcheme to you. A wife politician always pays attention to the rifing generation, in order to get hold of young minds before inimical prejudices are formed ; and thus, in time, he is enabled to bring forward a party that barfies all opposition. The firft habits of youth, you will generally find, determine the future character and conduct. I have the moft flattering profpect at prefent from the rifing genera- tion of both lexes ; and, as they will foon occupy the places of their predeceflbrs, I entertain the moft fanguine hopes of foon feeing fociety here what I have long defired. I DECLARE my fyftem of education to be that of the moft perfect freedom, and am averfe to every kind FUGITIVE PIECES. 209 kind of reftraint. A late ingenious author of your country (who, by the way, troubled himfelf too much about what he efteemed to be the public good), fays, in a little treatife, called the Art of Thinking, " Men commonly owe their good or bad qualities as much to education as to nature." IN this fentiment, however, he was right; and, as fafhionable people, and people of bufinefs, are, now-a-days, too much occupied (the firft with their amufements, and the fecond with their affairs and pleafures), to be troubled with the care and educa- tion of their children, I mean to give a fhort plan to make the matter as eafy for them as poffible. They cannot doubt of my regard for their offspring, for I take this trouble out of pure love and regard to them. 1 am, &c. BELZEBUB. E. C. LETTER II. S I R, JL O U gave a place to my laft, and it is well that you did ; for my refentment might have given you more vexation than a hundred of your own devils. I laid down a text, viz. Train up a child, &c. which I mean now to profecute, for I can preach as well as D d fame 21.0 FUGITIVE PIECES. fame of my enemies the clergy, and, fure I am, my doctrine will be found more palatable, and my pre- cepts eafier to follow,, than theirs. I SHALL firft fpeak of the training of boys. As foon as the child comes into the world, have a nurfe provided (if you poflibly can afford one), how- ever found the mother's conflitution may be. Let it remain in the houfe till the great dinner and drink is given on the brat's getting a name, ufually called the Christening. This will, perhaps, be the happieft day the father will experience upon its account j and his guefts will probably be made fo drunk, upon the joyful occafion, that they will curfe him and his brat for many days after. This being over, fend it off with the nurfe. It is not fit that the mother, in her poor weak way, or the father, with his company, fhduld be difturbed with the fqualling of the child, or the lullabies of a vulgar creature of a nurfe. The woman may be directed, however, to bring it with her when fhe comes to receive her quarter's payment ; but if it fhould be dead, flie may bring any other child of the fame age The father and mother won't know the difference ! WHEN the child is weaned, it muft be brought home, no doubt ; for one does not know what to do with it. By being gaudily dreffed, it may however ferve the pleafing purpofe of fometimes gratifying vanity. TAKE FUGITIVE PIECES. in TAKE fpecial care to have a handfome (mart young woman to keep the child. Defire her to be always fhowy in her appearance. It is not fit that your child fhould be carried about by a perfon who is only plain and clean, and whofe attire is fuitable to her wages. Give her a half- worn filk gown and flounced petticoat, with other fhowy articles of drefs. If fhe is tolerably well looked, flie will contrive to keep up the fhow for your credit, and your child will have the advantage of being early introduced into company, and of feeing the world much fooner than you are aware of. WHEN the child begins to prattle, let it be brought to table after dinner, and let the father, for the amufement of the company, teach its weak or- gans to pronounce what are called bad words ; learn it to lifp oaths fwearing is a fafhionable accom- plifhment, and fhould be taught early, that when he is old he may not depart from it. " Delightful talk ! to rear the tender thought, " To teach the young idea how to (hoot, " To pour the frefh infirudhon o'er the mind, " And breathe th' enlivening fpirit." IT is very diverting to a company to hear the firft efforts of fpeech exerted in attempting the bon ton language. Befides, the fervants will affift you in this, as private tutors below ftairs, without addi- tional wages, WHEN 212 FUGITIVE PIECES. WHEN the child is peevifh, and deflres what it fhould not have, don't let the poor thing fret, but give it what it wants. By encouraging this habit, he will in time lave you the trouble of judging for him, by taking what he wants, whether you think proper or not. If, by his own rafhnefs, he knocks his head or foot againft a table or chair, never fail to beat and abvife the table or chair for having done the injury. By and by, if a fervant, companion, or even his parent, fhould accidentally hurt him, he will not fail to follow the example, by kicking or beating them ; and this fliewsfpirif. When he comes to have play-fellows, let them be always thofe of in- ferior rank. Let your fon tell them, that they get their dinner from his papa for being kind to him. If he fhould defire any of their toys, and a conteft fhould arife, chide the little fellow who rebels for contradicting your dear boy's humour. SOME parents have a foolifh way of teaching their children the golden rule, " to do to others as they would ivijb to be done to themfelves in like circumftan. ces" The inftilling of this principle often cramps the humour of children, and checks a bold tyranni- cal fpirit, which I reckon a princely endowment. SOME harfli parents have alfo a practice of chafti- fing their children, when they are obftinately. capri- cious or deceitful. Moft mothers, however, will agree with me, that it is fliocking to put the poor little creatures FUGITIVE PIECES. 213 creatures under any reftraint, for they look fo vaftly pretty when they are pleafed, and then it hurts one's feelings to fee them out of humour. When he is fit to go to fchool, give fpecial charge to the matter not to chaftife your dear boy. Indeed you won't have your child beat, whatever his faults may be. Pay, however, handfomely, that you may not be affronted by your fon being very low hi the clafs. The notice he cannot attract by his own application, you may try to obtain by a handfome quarter's pay- ment; and be fure to raife his reputation in the fchool, by a genteel donation at Candlemas ; let it be at leaft a quater floreat. Having been accuftomed to conftant indulgence, the noble feelings of refent- ment and revenge will glow with ardour in his bread, on any attempt to controul him. If his mafter ftiould chaftife him, he will ihew that he cannot brook con- tradiction, by giving a blow. If acompanion fhould accidentally offend him, a knife will revenge the offence, and ibrrow and contrition he will utterly difdain. Every appearance of gentlenefs, tendernefs, modefty, or affection, fhould be checked early, i you wifh him to be a man of fajbion 3 and a modern fine fellow. You may get a private tutor to attend your fon, and pray pay attention to the character of the one you chufe. Do not let him be of a ferious or ftu- dious turn, but one who is acquainted with life j one who wifhes to appear as little of the clergyman or fcholar as poffible, but what is called A JOLLY DOG, 2i 4 FUGITIVE PIECES. DOG, who will fit with you and take his bottle, join in your toafts, liften to your feats of drinking or hunting, and fuch gentleman-like fubjefts of dif- courfe ; one who will not be too ftrict in looking after your boy, or give him a head-ach by keeping him too clofe to his leffons. Let your fon often fit with you after dinner, and teach him to drink his glais and give his toaft. Let him fee you get drunk now and then. This is the true method to prevent his catcning unfafbionable manners. FOLLOW my paradoxical friend RomTeau's advice as to RELIGION. Let all inftruclion on this fubjecl: come as late as poffible. Children who learn with wonderful facility all other branches of knowledge, cannot conceive that they {hall be accountable for their actions ; that the Deity is witnefs to all they do, and will reward the good, and punifh the bad. Such doctrine checks the propenfities of nature. But let die paffions open, and let habits be acquired, and you may then preach religion as much as you pleafe ; for it will have as little effecl: as I wifli it to have. Your own practice at home will alfo confirm your fon in the belief, that it is all a farce, and that there is nothing fo tirefome. That I may not ap- pear fo, I fliall at prefent conclude, and refume the fubjecl: in my next. I am, &c. BELZEBUB. E. C. LETTER FUGITIVE PIECES. 215- LETTER IIL S I R March 1 8. 1786. A. CERTAIN philofopher of Ancient Greece ufed frequently to go to an elevated Situation of the city on the market days, and call out to the people as they pafied " If you ivi/b for happinefs at home, or fafety to thejlate, EDUCATE YOUR CHILDREN." So fay I ; but my plan of education is fuited to the prefent ftate of fociety, and considerable alterations, it will be allowed, have taken place fince the days of Ancient Greece. THERE is a book called the BIBLE, and particu- larly that part called the NE w TESTAMENT, which I utterly abhor. Pray keep it carefully out of your {bn's hands ; for one does not know what paflage may ftrike his mind, and totally ruin the plan of making him zfne fellow. As you make little ufe of it yourfelf, except in the way of ridicule and witticifm, there is no danger of its doing much harm ;. and the tutor (if you have made a right choice) will only ufe it to enable him to get a living, without ha- ving any conviction of the truths it contains upon his heart. Never fpeak to your fon refpecting his duty to God, to fociety, or himfelf. Let all your precepts and example teach him to pleafe himfelf, and 216 FUGITIVE PIECES. and gratify his paffions, without regard to the rights of others. IT is delightful now-a-days to hear how my young friends fpeak of hell. They mention it with as much familiarity as if it was their father's houfe ; and, POOR THINGS ! theyfhall always be welcome to my habi- tation. If a civil queftion is afked at them, or if they invite a companion to go to any frolic, and he refu- fes, they pleafantly retort, Go to hell ; that is no more than to fay, Go home, where they will always find a warm reception. LET your fon ramble about wherever he pleafes, and particularly in the evenings (for I love works of darknefs), and make no enquiries where he has been ; for, if you do, you won't be much the wifer. He will by this practice acquire a free, bold, and forward manner, much above his years, to the fur- prife of every ferious thinking perfon. Let him af- fociate with what companions he pleafes ; and, as you have in your city a very indulgent police (or ra- ther no police at all), he will find, at every ftep, plenty of idle boys and girls, of all ages, on the ftreet ready for any frolic. Your late dinners, card parties, or public amufements, no doubt, will put it out of your power to attend to your fon ; but you need not think of him by my plan, he will find amufement for himfelf. If he comes home in the evening, before the card party is broke up, and his father fliould chide him, let mama obferve (betwixt the FUGITIVE PIECES. 217 the deals) that really fhe can fee no good to be got by always poring over books. The child's health might fuffer by confinement. 'Young mafter hear- ing this once or twice will foon learn as much arti- fice as to evade ever looking at a book. What fig- nifies Greek and Latin, or knowledge, or morals, to a fine gentleman. WHEN the boy does any thing uncommonly vi- cious, or deceitful for his years, laugh at the frolic, for it ihowsjpunk. Stroak his head upon fuch oc- cafions, and call him, in a kindly tone, a wicked little rogue, or a little Pickle. He will, from this treat- ment, every day improve, and Pickle will foon be- come a very wicked dog indeed. Don't reftrict him from keeping company with the fervants, or reading improving ballads with the maids i for he Ihould know all characters. AND now comes the time when the mofl necefla- ry part of modern education fhould be attended to, and that is DANCING. This is the period to form your fon either a pretty gentleman, by fome thick- pated people called a coxcomb , or ajfine fellow, not unfrequently termed a blackguard: But it is not un- likely you may fucceed in making him a part of both, which is the mofrfajhionable of all characters. This branch of education he will probably be fonder of than any other j and therefore give him as much of it as he pleafes, although all that is made of it now-a-days is to be able tofcamper through a coun- E e try 2i8 FUGITIVE PIECES. try dance. Gracefulnefs, elegance, and tafte, are to- tally out of fafhion in dancing. Romping is the ton. The frolicking with the mifTes will pleafe him -ua/Hy 9 and the evening pra&ifings he will delight in. LET mamma ftudy now to drefs him well, by gi- ving him laced linen, the moft fafhionable large buckles, handfome filk ftockings, embroidered waift- coats, and every tonijh piece of drefs in perfection. The father, if he is (what is called) a fenfible man, will probably remonftrate againft all this finery, and reprefent dancing as only a frivolous and fecondary accomplifhment : But the proper way of reafoning for mothers is, to hold thefe as antiquated notions : The poor fellow muft be clean ; and then it looks fo vttftly pretty and genteel^ and the mifles will be quite hi love with him Had not Lord B 's fon fuch a drefs ? and Sir R. S 's fon fuch another ? Ten to one but the father may fay People of rank's children are the moft fimply drefled. This, howe- ver, muft be laughed at, and mafter will be indul- ged. When the ball comes about, the dear boy muft have pocket-money, and furely nothing ripens a young perfon more than plenty of pocket-money. The fame fort of father may perhaps fay What oc- cafion has his fon for money ? he gets what is pro- per for him, and money he may put to improper purpofes All he can want at a ball is perhaps an orange. BUT it muft be anfwered, Poor thing ! it makes him FUGITIVE PIECES. $19 him fo happy ! and then Mafter Such-a-one had fo much money at the laft ball, and people muft be neighbour like, you know. Not that I would give our fon fo much gold as Gold ! perhaps the father will interrupt haftily. Why, Mrs Careful, who has the beft bred fons at the fchool, gives them only fix- pence, and it is enough. There was but laft year a parcel of your pocket-money BOYS had a hot fupper and a drink ! in a neighbouring tavern, inftead of their bread and milk. Others again bought negus (which, by the way, ought always to be permitted at dancing fchool balls, and made ftrong), and the confequence of all this was, that a number of boys got drunk, difturbed the company, and infulted the girls. The anfwer to this remonftrance of the fa- ther is plain enough, viz. Your dear boy is better bred, and won't do fo j therefore give him the mo- ney, and make the boy happy. IF the father is a man of an eafy temper, or one of the ton, who follows his own plealures, he will let the mother and the fon do juft as they pleafe, and then all parties will be fatisfied, which is what I wifh. BY following this plan, which is now indeed very much pra&ifed, your fon will be a MAN at twelve, a boy all the reft of his life. And as you mortals wifh to remain young as long as you can, this fyftem cannot fail of being very agreeable. It would be te- dious to fuit this plan of education to every condi- tion ; 220 FUGITIVE PIECES. tion j but difccrning parents will be eafily able to apply the general principle to particular fituations. IN my next I lhall introduce my young man a little more into life. I am, &c. BELZEBUB. E. C. LETTER IV. Now has your well-train* & fon mature attain'd The joyful prime, when youth, elate and gay, Steps into life, and follows, unreftrain'd, Where paffion leads, or plcafure points the way. SIR, March 26. 1786. J.N mylaft I approved of parents making their fons MEN at twelve, that they might be BOYS all the reft of their lives ; and as people wifh to remain young as long as they can, I hope the fyftem was not difpleafing. If I may judge from practice, it is indeed much otherwife than difpleafing, and it un- doubtedly has a manifeft advantage in faving time. Why, Sir, a few years ago, a BOY in your country was a BOY till he had pafled the greateft part of his academical ftudies, and bafhfulnefs and modefty even marked FUGITIVE PIECES. 221 marked the demeanour of riper years. Boys were then laughed at, and hilled by their fchool-fellows, as filly inlignificant puppies, who were taken up a- bout drefs, or in attending the mifles : But now, be- fore they have half learned their grammar and ex- ercifes, they commence men of gallantry; after which parents and matters may attempt indeed to teach them, but in reality their education is finifhed. The mauvaife honte, which my friend Chefterfield labours fo much to conquer, is nowfoon got over, and you have knowing little fellows long before they go to college. Some of your graver fort of people wonder at the pertnefs and impudence of the boys, but thefe unfajhionable people are wearing out. SOME moral writers (who, by the way, I am glad to fee fo little attended to), boldly afTert, that IG- NORANCE OF VICE IS THE SUREST GUARDIAN OF VIRTUE. This is ftrange dod, and how he gulled his mother. Inftead of attending the French or any FUGITIVE PIECES. 227 any evening fchool, he will now and then rake about the ftreets, and in the groupes of apprentice boys and 'girls, and my more advanced friends, who, by a proper indulgence of the police, infeft it, his knowledge and manners will be highly improved. When young muTes come to vitit at home, they will not find your fon fieepijh or bafiftd ! Scn:c mothers complain, that they dare not truft their daughters out of their fight, the boys are fo early vicious, and fo foon turn black- guards. I fhall give my advice upon this point, when I come to fpeak of FEMALE EDUCATION. THE next ftep is to have zfa/hionable hairdrefler. Your fon muft have no regular time of dreffing, if he wifhes to be fajbianable. Let his hair be combed in the morning half dreiTed before dinner and full dreiTed in the evening. An hour at leaft each time muft be employed in this important bufmefs. Brown powder in the morning a mixture of brown and white before dinner and in the evening, white fcented. In the morning, the hair may be loofely plaited, and turned up like a lady's on the top of the head ; but as this fafhion has now got down to footmen, fome new mode muft be devifed. Let my young friends always follow the fa/lion of the ladies % and they cannot be far wrong. Your fon will re- ceive much inftruclion by being fo long in company every day with the hairdreffer. The news of every family he attends, and their economy, will be nar- rated. How the rnifles are employed how to be dreffed their converfation and their engagements ; befides 228 FUGITIVE PIECES. betides he may drop a hint now and then, &c. Ey this means the hairdrefler will become a moft do- mejllc animal y and the m after or miftrefs need not be furprifed if he fhould fometimes be their lodger for a night. NANNY and BETTY, the fervants, are prudent girls, and your fon or daughter may profit fome day by their circumfpeclion ! MR Pommade runs no rifk of detection in his own intrigue with the maids, unlefs the miftrefs is feized with wandering about at untimeous hours ; or young mafter fhould want a glafs of water at midnight. I am, &c. B E L Z E B U B, E. C. LETTER VI. Vain, idle, fenfelefs, now in thoughtlefs eafe, Referving woes for age their life they fpend ; But wretched ! hopelefs ! in the evil days, With forrow to the verge of life they tend ; Tir'd with the prefcnt of the paft aftiam'd They live, and are defpis'd : They die, nor more are nam'd ! S I R, OUCH is the pifture fome of your WISE people draw for the generality of the young of the prefent age. Thefe WISE HEADS reprefent this life as on- ly the dawn of endlefs exiftence 5 that it is, there- fore, FUGITIVE PIECES. 22? fore, of importance to confider the deftiny of man ! that happinefs, even here, muft refult from the confcioufnefs of a ufefiil and well fpent life ; and that, to have the ftream run clear, care muft be ta- ken, that the fountain is not polluted. But all this, like every thing elfe that isferious, in this froliefome age, fliould be ridiculed. Thefe WISE ONES are weak enough to venture to contrail one of their fine fellows with one of mine ; but, hi reality, there is no comparifon. They paint a youth of innocence and Simplicity, with the feeds of virtue and piety early implanted, and gradually expanding a deflre of ufeful knowledge increafing, and, in time, railing the mind to elevation and fublimity, in the contem- plation of the immenfity of the power, the wifdom, and goodnefs difplayed in the vifible creation ; in tracing the nature of man, his powers, his duties, and his deftination ; purfuing fources of delightful entertainment in the hiftory and afpeft of mankind, in various periods and fituations. They exhibit their young man as pofieffing a heart warmed with bene- volent and kind affeftionsj his actions guided by juftice and reafon, and always purfuing the beft means to obtain the worthieft ends ; enjoying the bounties of providence in moderation, with a cheer- ful and thankful heart ; defpifing meannefs, felfiih- nefs, and deceit, and holding every breach of mo- ral duty as unbecoming a gentleman. Thus educa- ted, they reprefent him as a warm friend an enter- taining and inftrufting companion, perhaps poflef- fing wit, bat without grofiuefs or indelicacy, and never 2 3 o FUGITIVE PIECES. never withill nature, but to lafh vice a ufeful mem- ber of fociety, amiable, and efteemed in all the re- lations of life, regretted in death, but never dead in the affectionate remembrance of his friends ! BUT, in our fafljionable language, this is all a d- d bore it is mere twaddle. My gay fine fel- lows laugh at all this kind of Jlttf. Such a fellow- has no foul no fpunk they would not get drunk with him, he is not enough of the ton. Indeed, if any one appears fuperior to his neighbours in point of knowledge or principle, my friends very properly run him down, or, if he is young, they foon laugh him out of his notions ; and do not many philofo- phers maintain, That ridicule is the teft of truth ? and the many inftances that happen of the kind I have mentioned, prove the juftnefs of their dodbrine. A very few, indeed, affeft to pity and defpife my friends, but they gain nothing by this j for the pity and contempt are mutual, and I have at lea ft ten to one in my favour. My young friends make the moft of life. They make ule of what is fet before them, and think not of to-morrow. They are tired fome- times, no doubt, for they try their conftitutions, to be fure, pretty freely; and vacant hours will happen. But if a tedium vttie fhould at laft opprefs them, that is (to explain to thofe who have not learned Latin), if they fhould have no more re- li(h for eating and drinking, dancing, playing at cards , gallantry, gambling, and diverfions, there being no other refcurces of entertainment worth notice, they very FUGITIVE PIECES. 231 very properly have the manlinefs to put an end to a life that is become ivearifome ; and thus they boldly extinguifh their Jpunk, when it will no longer fhine with its ufual brightnefs. Left fome of my young friends, however, fhould miftake the road, by fal- ling in with bad company, or bad example, I fhall point out the broad way. I am to fuppofe, that my directions for educating your fon in early life, without moral or religious principles, to have been followed, and that now he is upon his entrance into life, without a TASTE for knowledge. ANY little attention your fon has hitherto been obliged to give to books has been tirefome and irk- fome. The fatigue of reading or thinking is into- lerable. But he will prefently fit up whole nights in a tavern, or gallop from fun- rife to fun-fet after a pack of hounds, without reckoning it any fatigue at all. He will hate to liften to people of good fenfe and delicate manners. By the education he has received, he will think himfelf a man long before nature intended he fhould be, and loofe (that \sfreej converfation will, with him, be the harbinger of fimilar conduct. SOME moral writers reprefent, " That few know how to be idle and innocent, or have relifh for " any pleafures not criminal ; every diverfion they " take is at the expence of fome virtue, and the firft ftep from neceffary employment, or bufinefs, is into 232 FUGITIVE PIECES, " into vice or folly." To prevent this, thefe odd fort of people recommend the forming a young per- fon's tafte for letters the fine arts manly exercifes and accomplifhments, &c. I have no objection more than they, in my plan of education, to fill up vacant hours by reading. It gives njlimulus and zeft to ac- tive employment. My plan of reading, however, is far more light, fajy t and agreeable than theirs. No regular plan is requifite, and it may be refumed at any time, with equal improvement, WHAT I recommend to your fon's perufal are mo* dern novels magazines comedies and farces trials for divorce^ which the neighbouring kingdom fo amply fornifhes now-a-days, and which are always publifh- ed. Indeed, there are now luckily publishers who will print and fell any thing that does not endanger their ears. Some of them, for the good they have done to my intereft, by their total disregard of de- cency and propriety, fhould be rewarded with the dignified title of Mojl Excellent Printers to Us Infer- nal Majefty. IF your fon can read French, there is alfo ample ft ore in that language for his amufement and im- provement. THE novels of the laft age were of the grand and heroic kind. They were not a picture of life indeed, but had a tendency to infufe a (lately dignity of cha- racter, which now is laughed at. The prefcnt, with FUGITIVE PIECES. 333 a few exceptions, are more warm and inflammatory^ and more fuited to life and manners, which, to fay the truth, are much indebted to thefe compofitions for the liberal progrefs that is made and ftill making towards what / reckon perfection. To the honour of this country, a Scotfman was one of the firft and the ableft writer in this delightful fpecies of compofition, and moft rapidly did his labours increafe the num- ber of my votaries, many of whom are now reaping the fruits of the inftruction. De Vergy, an Anglo- Frenchman followed next ; and then, a thoufand of" my kind friends after him. It has been faid that " Fontaine and Chaucer dying, wifti'd unwrote " The fprightlieft efforts of their wanton thought." And a great though falfely admired writer has given this opinion " But in one point is all true wifdom caft, " To think THAT early we mufl think at laft." BUT fuch filly fentiments tend to check the glori- ous liberty of the prefs j and this liberty, which has long been without controul, I am much indebted to, and I will not fail to reward its bold fupporters. Of late years, I have been much obliged by the writings of a French gentleman the younger Crebillon. His works have been the foundation of fome of the moft recent, and the moft remarkable divorces that ever took place. All thefe works are very properly publicly advertifed, and Parliament, with their LORDS SPI- G g RITUAL, 334 FUGITIVE PIECES. RITUAL, either fee not the confequences, or very wifely do not chufe to take notice of them. The Chamberlain alfo daily gives licences for theatrical performances, quite to my mind, although the King publifhes a proclamation for the fuppreffion of vice and immorality. I can have no objection to his Ma- jefty making an appearance of reformation, if the officers of the Crown encourage licentioufnefs. I approve much of the great increafe of circulating libraries over the kingdom. An indifcriminate reader at thefe feminaries of knowledge I could not wifh to fee in a more hopeful train. A circulating library kept by a man of tafte, principles, and attention, I would indeed very much diflike ; for it might pro- mote a relifh for literature and ufeful knowledge at an eafy rate, and he might be patron ifed by my ene- mies. But, amidft the great numbers that now a- bound, this can but rarely happen ; therefore I wifh them all manner of fuccefs. LET your fon read as many of the above fort of books as he pleafes. Don't be afraid of his hurting his eyes, or of his getting a head-ach in fuch ftudy. He will, for his amufement, alfo recommend them to the mifles, who may happen to be more ignorant than himfelf. As the paffions are not fujficiently ftrong of themfelves, and eaftly kept under command, the perufal of fuch books are neceffary to give them due force. The paffions might have lain dormant without fuch affiftance. Your fon will now think of nothing FUGITIVE PIECES. 235 nothing elfe but indulgence. He will judge of every female, as the befti&fera: do of every animal they can conquer, viz. that they are lawful prey ; and, like them too, he will foon learn to be dextrous in the arts of enfnaring. He may probably tire of the common herd of the abandoned; but any inno- cent girl who ftrikes his fancy he will be artful in wiles and ftratagems to feduce. It is remarked by fome acute obfervers of human nature, " That " young people early corrupted are generally m- human and cruel that they are impatient, vin- " didtive, impetuous, and frequently brutal in their manners. They have only one object to occupy their imagination ; in purfuit of which they will *' lie, cheat j and deceive, yet reckon themfelves gentle- " men upon honour" But all this is no more than to fay, that the boys are bold zndjpiritedy and they do credk to me by their principles and practice. YOUR fon, thus begun, will not fcrupleto in/lrufl the daughter of his father's beft friend or the fitter of his intimate companion, in all he knows ; but on the mention of his own fitter being fo treated, pro- bably his honour will be roufed, and he will think himfelf included in the infamy and difgrace which the prejudices of the world yet throw upon want of delicacy or virtue in the female character. But, Do as you would be done by, was no part of his educa- 1 tion. 1 am, &c. BELZEBUB. E. C. LETTER 2 3 6 FUGITIVE PIECES. LETTER VII. " Reafon panders will." SHAKESPEARE. SIR, April 17. 1786. OOME few years flnce, the young people ufed to have philofophical difputes among themfelves about the foundation of morality the origin of evil jit and unfit right and wrong the good offociety^ &c. But the WISE OBSERVERS ofthe prefent day take the li- berty of faying, that the youth now follow the wrong without any difpute nay, and that too, long before they know what is right. Upon this head, however, I will argue, for the fake of my young friends, with any of your moral philofophers. What they call wrong, I pofitively aver to be right ; and I hope I may be allowed to be the oldeft difputant whatever, upon the fubjecl of the origin of evil) and right and wrong, if that gives any claim of refpect to opinion. Human life, Sir, is too fhort for metaphyfical dif- ^>utes and enquiries ; and my young friends are right to follow their own inclinations, without giving themfelves the trouble of thinking about what \sfa, or what is wrong. But even without my affiftance, if any of my young friends fhould be attacked by thefe faftidious moralifts, they can defend them- felves by unanfwerable argument. For inftance, up- on the fubject with which I concluded my laft let- ter FUGITIVE PIECES. 237 ter. There is nothing more common than to hear youth of modern honour zn&fajbion ufe tills argument for female feduftion. WHY, fuch a plan, no doubt, would have been difgraceful and infamous, to have attempted upon a woman of rank and fajlnsn ! but to an ordinary girl, and below one's own rank, Lord ! where's the harm ? Suppofe now one of your men of principle fhould take up this argument againft a gay young fel- low, it would probably go on in this manner, and in the end you'll find the philofopher will be iilenced. Philofopher. All mankind, Sir, are equal in the fight of the Almighty ! and the rights of none can be infringed without guilt. What you call people of rank zn&fajhion, I fuppofe, are thofe of an equal rank with yourfelf, or riling above that rank ; and people of ordinary condition are below your own rank. Gentleman. You are right, Sir, as to the diftinc- tion of rank ; but I deny that all men are equal. I confider thofe below me as born to be fubfervient to me ; and I think there is no harm in feducing a girl that is not entitled to expect me for a hufband. If {he allows liberties in fuch expectation, fhe is a fool : If fhe keeps her own fecret, and manages well, fhe has a chance of getting a hufband fuitable to her. Philofopher 23 B FUGITIVE PIECES. Phllofopher. AH rank, Sir, is adventitious: It might have been mine as well as your's. Go back but a little way, and you will find all our predeceflbrs were favages and barbarians. Accident raifed one, and deprefTed another. The high to-day may be low to-morrow, while thofe in a humble fphere may rife to opulence and honours ; and can mere acci- dental circumftances vary the nature and obligations of man ? The higher his ftation, the more duties he has .to perform ; and will the Almighty ! before whom all mankind are lefs than nothing, liften to the plea of rank, as a palliation of a crime ? Accord- ing to human reafon and juftice, it is an aggrava- tion. But taking your own argument You fay, you do no injury by feduction when the female is of an inferior rank ; and it is only an injury when fhe is of equal or fuperior ftation j that, by adding de- ceit and falfehood to criminality, fhe -may pafs well enough for the bofom friend and the domeftic com- fort of a man of her own rank. Be it fo : Then furely every rank fuperior to your own do no injury in feducing or debauching your fifter, and in all pro- bability expofing her to fhame and infamy ; or, if not, fhe is good enough for a wife to one of her own ftation. Gentleman. Hold, Sir Start not fuch an idea By Heavens ! were any man, be his ftation what it would, to offer the fmalleft indelicacy or indignity to my fifter, I would put him to death without kruple, FUGITIVE PIECES. 239 fcruple, were I to be facrificed for it the next mo- ment. No more of this, Sir, I pray. Philofopher. You are juftly warm, and right, Sir. But, on cool reflection, you muft fee that every in- ferior rank to you have as good a right to punHh people in your ftation, as you have thofe above you. Believe me, " Do as you would be done by" muft be the rule of action hi every ftation and fituation of life, if we would do right. It is with you as with too many in the world : The head is employed in finding an excufe for the inclination, without exa- mining the propriety or juftice of the action. Gentleman. You diftradt me, Sir Go to HELL with your arguments* THIS, as I hinted, is an unanfiveralle argument, and the philofopher is filenced. This retort very properly clofes many a debate, and difputants can go to no place where they will be made more wel- come ; but your men of principle, I have always found, are very fhy of coming to BELZEBUB. E. C. LETTER 2 4 o FUGITIVE PIECES. LETTER VIII. I looked through my cafement, and difcerned among che youth, a young man void of underftan ding, pafling through the ftreet. In the rwiiight there met him a woman in the attire of a harlot, and fubtile of heart. She was lo/.d and Jlubborn, her feel abode tot in her houfe. Now fhe was -without, now in the ftreet, and lay in wait at every corner. With an impudent face fticfaid, " Come, I have peace-offerings with me." But her houfe is the way to HELL! SOLOMON. OUCH were the obfervations, and fuch the reflec- tion of one of my moft ancient and" inveterate ene- mies, on looking one evening from his window; and by people of abfurd tafte it is reckoned a very fine defcription even at this day. But, after all, he faw but one among the many fo employed ; which ftiows that my interejl was then rather at a low ebb. Times, however, are greatly mended; had the au- thor lived now a-days, he probably would have thought that his window had been glazed with mul- tiplying gla/es, or difbelieved his own eyes, efpecial- ly if it happened to be Sunday evening when he made his obfervation. IF it was from the attire the being fultile or cun- ning the gadding about thejlreets, and never reft ing at home the impudent, or undifmayed countenance the loud talking or objlinacy, that he took the woman for a harlot, he probably would (according to his notions) have had but an indifferent opinion of ma- ny FUGITIVE PIECES. 241 ny of the modern females at firft fight. But thefe appearances I may poflibly come to defend, for the fake of my female friends, in fome future letter. HE does not mention the age of the youth he ob- ferved ; but as, till of late, boys were toys till eigh- teen and upwards, it is prefumeable, that, in thefe earlier days, his ftngular young man was at leaft a- bove the age of majority at the time of the obferva- tion. Had he lived now a-days, however, he might have feen whole groups of little fellows at thirteen, fourteen, and fifteen years of age, anfwering the de- fcription of his YOUNG MAN, even in this cold cli- mate ; and often led on by thofe who, although they cannot indeed be faid to be youth, may yet be allowed to be void of under/landing ! IT is matter of pleafing aftonifhment to me to ob- ferve the fuccefs of my plans refpe&ing education and manners of late years ; and I muft fay, that my e mif- faries have been very attentive and afiiduous. Thefe plans I may fome day more fully open, when my in- tereft has acquired a proper degree of ftrength ; and when I fee people of all denominations determinately going to HELL as fail as they can. In the mean time, I wifh to avoid bold and violent fir etches in vice, for thefe ftrike even the dulleft and moft lukewarm ene- mies ; but I would rather fteal gently on, ftep by-ftep, without alarming, till I get a proper footing. " Ex glande altiffima quercus." H h Some, 242 FUGITIVE PIECES. Some, indeed, of what are called The Difcernjng y de- tect my fchemes, and perceive the confequences to fociety j but thefe are few in number, and only la- ment in fecret. They mark the beginning of the dif- eafe, and would wifh to apply an immediate remedy ; but they have no power or influence ; and, as my poi- fon glides in by a foft and flow progrefs, people become accuftomed to the diforder, and think nothing is wrong till the whole mafs is corrupted. I was fome- what apprehenfive I had gorje on too rapidly by pro- vokinga ROYAL PROCLAMATION * againft me, but it has been feebly enforced, or rather not enforced at all. Few people knew any thing about it. The great difregarded it, my friends among all ranks fneered at it, as they very properly do at every thing ferious, and magiftrates could not be at the trouble to attend to it. IN the latter part of the above quotation from OLD SOLOMON, he wifhes to throw a very ungentleman- like reflection againft the place of my abode. My friends, however, muft difregard fuchfnar/ers- I can boaft of a tuarm fire-fide, and they may truft, that they will meet with very genteel company, and that all my vifitors will be treated with equal hofpitality, and without my wearying of their prefence, which they muft allow has too often been the cafe with them in their landlords houfes during their fhort ftay upon earth. VICE * His Majefty's proclamation againft vice and immorality, ia June 1*87. FUGITIVE PIECES. 243 VICE has always fomething fweet and alluring in it, at the time ; and, to make people pleafed with the prefent, and difregardful of the future, is my great fyftem of politics. When reftraints of confci- ence and decency of manners are neglected or defpi- fed by the great, then freedom and pleafttre or (to fpeak in common language), licefttioufnefs will quickly fpread among the people. It is faidj that the high and the low ranks Hand moil in- need of religion, to keep them what is called correct in conduct ; but I am glad to fee, that, by thefe two clafles, religion is moft neglected. Hence the violent purfuit of what is called pleafure y in the firft, and the prevailing fierce nefs ef manners and crimes^ in the latter. I muft, indeed, allow that I am moft indebted to the great ; and, but for their aid and example, the lower clafles might be- come moral, honeft, gentle, and fearful of offending. IN the motto from Solomon, he alfo ftrikes at one of the greateft fources I poflefs of acquiring new fubjects to my kingdom; but while there is a plentiful circulation of obfcene books and prints ; no reftraint from police to the immenfe number of pro- ftitutes which infeft the ftreets of every great town ; and a freedom of manners that fpurns at religion and common decency, encouraged by licentious plays and newfpapers, I do not defpair of always having a rich crop on the ground. I HAVE always faid, that TOO MUCH LIBERTY AND LUXURY would make Britain my own. YOUR 244 FUGITIVE PIECES. YOUR reafoning people argue thus upon this fub- je&: The births of males and females in the human race are nearly equal ; hence, fay they, the marriage of one man with one woman is the obvious intention of Providence. That an abandoned woman, or a harlot, is therefore a human being loft to fociety, that fhe forfeits every hope of domeftic comfort and ufeful- nefs, and the intention of her exiftence is perverted by the unlawful paffion of man. But fhe is not only loft to fociety and herfelf, but fhe becomes a dangerous nuifance, by being the caufe of the corruption and the lofs of others who might have been ufeful. Befides, fhe leads youth from the path of integrity and duty. From induftry and fobriety fhe plunges them into idlenefs, expence, diffipation, and crimes, which often terminate in the gibbet. Witnefs the confeffions of the nume- rous malefactors at the fatal tree ! BETTER then, fay thefe WISE ONES, if fuchan evil is unavoidable in corrupt fociety, to devote a few, and keep them feparate, than allow general deftruction, by permitting the ftreets to be crouded with the abando- ned, fo that neither male nor female of any age can pafs without importunity to vice, infult, or robbery, at every ftep *. Vice foon fpreads its baneful influence from individuals to families from families to cities from * The police of the city of Newcaflle upon Tyne is faid to be better attended to in this particular than any of its fize and po- pulation in Britain ; and there are confequently few crimes. Proftitutes infefting the flreets there are immediately taken up and confined, and effectually baniflicd. FUGITIVE PIECES. 245 from cities to the empire and an empire corrupted is an empire loft. I MUST allow that there is fomething plaufible in thefe arguments ; but, fortunately for my intereft, men are guided more by pajfion than reafoti, and Go- vernment is above paying attention to the MANNERS of the people, although upon them depend the fecurity of the flate. I am much offended at the late inftitu- tion of Sunday fchools, and muft exert myfelf to de- feat the purpofes of this innovation. The young I confider as my peculiar charge ; and it is long iince I faid, -Farewell fear- Farewell remorfe : All good to me is loft. Evil be them my good. AND fuch a way of thinking, is my wifh for all mankind. This fubject has led me to too great a length. In my next, I fhall conclude thefe letters with a fhort Iketch of my pupil, as a member of fociety, when directions are unneceflary, the character being formed. lam, &c. BELZEBUB. LETTER FUGITIVE PIECES* LETTER IX. : A favourite brood appears ; In whom the daemon, with a mother's joy, Views all her charms refhdled all her cares In full repayed. .H.UMAN nature, corrupt as I have endeavoured to make it, feldom reaches to any high degree of de- pravity all at once* It often requires the favouring circumftances of bad example, and bad companions, to bring it to what I wilh to have it. HE who never thinks, fay the fages, never can be wife; and hence, they alledge, that fo few are to be found who have made a juft eftimate of human life, or of the proper enjoyments of time. My doctrine is diametrically oppofite to this. I ardently wifli not to think myfelf either on the paft or the future. In this particular precept of not thinking^ I muft own my young friends act with a moft exemplary and com- mendable perfeverance. Thinking, forefight, and the weighing the import of actions, deftroys prefent enjoyment, and there will be room enough for think- ing in another world than this, which will afford ample fcope both for thinking and regret. THESE reputed fages fay, that, by not thinking, we often fee the dignity of MAN loft in the debafement of FUGITIVE PIECES. 246 of the BRUTE, The intellectual powers of man, which, if properly cultivated, are fitted to raife hu* man nature to a near alliance with fuperior beings, are funk in the mere fenfual purfuits of animal life ; nay, that the mental faculties are frequently only em- ployed in devifing means of abuiing the animal in- ftincls which nature has beftowed upon man, fo that he is often feen in a more humiliating fituation than even the brute creation. THESE wife people alfo reprefent, that A languid, leaden iteration reigns, And ever muft, o'er thofe whofe joys, are joys Of f en fe. On lighten'd minds that baflc in Virtue's beams Nothing hangs tedious. -r-r- Each riling morning fees them higher rifej Each bounteous dawn its novelty prefents, To worth maturing. While Nature's circle, like a chariot wheel, Rolling beneath their elevated aims, Makes their fair profpecl fairer every hour ; Advancing virtue, in a line to blifs : VIRTUE, which Chriftian motives bed infpire! And BLISS, which Chriftian fchemes alone enfure ! IT is ftrange what different views people will take of a fubject. I feel no pleafure from fitch profpetts t nor any that I love will encourage them. DOES not every man feel himfelf mafter of his own exigence, and why Qipuld he not enjoy it as beft plea, fe-j 248 FUGITIVE PIECES. fes himfelf? Why ftiould people be troubled with confidering what may be the intention of Providence, the good of fociety, or future profpects of blifs, when they have their own inclinations to pleafe here ? Manners are now changed, and the age is too much enlightened to attend to any thing but felf-indulgence, and the flow of life. Happinefs now confifts in perfuading the world that you are happy and void of reflection, by attending to external ap- pearance and fa/hion. Some fqueamifh people, in- deed, will have fpafms of mind at times, very unplea- fant, I muft own, as I have experienced ; but thefe will go off by perfeverance in the line I recommend. The difeafe feldom takes deep root. The aiming at higher degrees of moral perfection infects few minds. IN conformity with my fyftem, it is not now fo much the object of education with parents to make their children good, worthy, and amiable, as to make ihemjti/bionable zndjhoivy. It is quite unfafhionable to form the heart and manners, by inftilling principles of probity, humanity, gentlenefs, candour, and the train of manly and amiable virtues. Thofe who are early trained in the principles of religion and morality, confirmed by good example, feldom come to me. I have fometimes hopes of them, but, upon the whole, they do not wander wide. That difagreeable thing cal- led CONSCIENCE always brings them about to what 7 think they fhould defpife. If thefe oppofition principles (as I call them) are neglected till the age of fourteen, in general all is well for me. The fmattering of Latin and FUGITIVE PIECES. 249 and French they may receive at fchool can do them no harm. The knowledge of the heathen mythology, and the amours of the deities, are very amufing ; and this is very properly the only fyftem of religion with which many young men enter into life. The fyftem of the New Teftament, and the principles of Chriftianity, fpoil young people for my purpofe. I know it is the plan of fome parents to watch the opening dawn of the mind, when novelty like the ri- ling fun gilds every object with delight, and when dazzling appearances allure to dangerous distances from the right road ; when inexperience forefces not the dark clouds that are ariiing from afar, to obfcure the profpect, and to bewilder the flranger. It is at this period that thefe parents inftil principles of religion, and of moral conduct, which the tempefts of life ihall not fhake, nor the attacks of temptation overpower. But, fortunately for my intereft, the number of fuch parents are few, and they are daily decreafing as the oppofite fyftem prevails. Could parents indeed look into the volume of fu^ turity, how would they be fhocked to fee the mifcon- duct and crimes of their children, to have originated in the neglect of education and good example ? How would the moft inconfiderate parents tremble to hear the reflections againft them in after life, for follies not corrected, propenfities not checked in youth ? But fuch thoughts would mar the pleafures and fa- fhion of life, and parents are very properly too much I i occupied 2 5 s FUGITIVE PIECES. occupied with the prefent, to take concern about the future. A youth educated upon my fyftem, which is now the prevailing one, comes into life ignorant and un- principled. He talks of honour, but breaks through every fetter and moral obligation that obftrucls the ca- reer of fenfuality, felf-indulgence, or vanity. The vegetative and animal part of his nature is duly attend- ed to ; but the rational, intellectual, and fpiritual, it 5s irkfome to cultivate, and puts a reftraint on animal indulgences. He can talk fluently of horfes, dogs, guns, bottles, bumpers, and wenches ; but if, at any time, he is unhappily fituated with people of fenfe, and the converfation takes a more important turn, he is fuddenly feized as if with a locked jaw, perhaps falls afleep, and has no refource but to repair to the ta- vern, the brothel, or the gaming table, in order tQ join fome riotous crew of my fine fellows. - u And when night " Darkens the ftreets, then wander forth the Tons " Of Belial, flown with infolence and wine." With fuch companions he aflbciates. Similar vices, and Cmilar ignorance, it is faid, is the principle of their aflbciation, and hence their attachment is without benevolence their familiarity without friendship. But they are pleafed, and fo am I. A fnarling enemy of mine feeing a group of thefe young fellows together one day, faid, it was aftonijhtng byivkat a -variety of U IE- ROGLYPHICS Nature had contrived to exprefs Folly! But, TUGITIVE PIECES. z$i But, as they have no mental refources, why fhould they not purfue folly, rendered fafhionable by fo many brilliant examples, and the only purfuits for which their taftes are fitted ? Heavy hours, no doubt, they do experience, and I am plagued to death with con- triving vicious amufements for fo many of them ; and yet many come to me from tedium i)it& before their time of doing mifchief is over. This office of mine often induces me to think; that the fatigue and vexations of the laborious are not half fo much to be pitied as the ftare of the languid, or the vacant look and yawn of the idle. But idlenefs, as the proverb fays, is my faddled horfe, and I avail my- felf of it. Sunday is a wearifome day to my friends, for the laws of the country ftill give countenance to its obfervance. However, on Sunday I do more real bufinefs among all ranks than on all the other days of the week. Whenever I bring the mind to lofe reverence for the duties of that day, I reckon it a prize ; and I hope foon to fee the fourth law in the Decalogue in complete difufe. As long as health and ftrength continue, lean con- trive amufement for my friends pretty well. I do not fay they are ufeful to the ftate, to fociety, or to them- felves ; but, while the delirium of pleafure and fafhion continues, they feel no uneafinefs, except fometimes when they awake in the dark, or are feized with a fit of ficknefs : But, in the decline of life, I am fadly plagued with them. A vacant mind, with no fund of 252 FUGITIVE PIECES. of confolation the retrofpect of a muTpent life, and a difrelifh of folly, makes them peevifh and caprici- ous to all around them, and infupportable to them- felves. It is then they have forebodings, and a fore- tafte of horrors which I cannot alleviate, but by drowning care with inebriety. It is then the force of the fentiment of the poet meets them, " I clafp'd the phantoms, and I found them air. " O had I weigh'd them ere my fond embrace, " What darts of agony had mifs'd my heart !" They feel pungent regret on hearing a modern au- thor fay, " Every year of a wife man's life fhould be a cenfure on the paft." The boy defpifes the infant, the man the boy, the philofopher both, and the CHRISTIAN all. They wifh indeed to have life to begin anew j for, as fons, hufbands, fathers, men, they have been miferably miflaken ; but it is too late, and they die either ftupidly infenfible, or torn with remorfe for their mifconduct ; but they are welcome- ly received into the arms of BELZEBUB. FUGITIVE PIECES. To MR **. SIR, Off. 15. IF the many vices which degrade your character leave you doubtful of what may be the caufe of this letter, know that the purpofe of it is to give you notice of the death of Mifs , whom you bafely betrayed, and abandoned to difiionour. This night fhe lies in a grave, a monument of your infamy, and an example of that pride which allows not its pofTefTor to live infoame ! Of her many mi- feries you were the wretched caufe In her deep and poignant contrition may you ere long be her equal. Ambitious, as you at prefent are, Sir, of fafnion- ablc profligacy, you were not always fo. In your boy- ifli years, I remember, you bade fair for goodnefs and wifdom : Perfonal accomplishments feemed to em- bellifh mental attainments; but the influence of bad company, upon a latent vicious difpofition, changed your conduct, and in a fhort time eflablifhed your cha- racter. When I review the arts which you pracrifed to ac- complifh the ruin of that beauteous unfortunate, who has juft left the world, I know not whether to be moffc indignant againft your profligacy, or the deep difinge- nuity which marked every ftep of your conduct. In reputation *54 FUGITIVE PIECES, reputation and ftation, you knew her family to be equal to your own. You knew that this daughter's education was the chief pleafure of her parents decli- ning days. Her mind was carefully inftructed in every worthy fentiment ; and it was a pleating reflection to fond parents, that her early conduct fpoke her to be amiable, ingenuous, and fenfible. There is unhappily in female youth a period when fenfibility of foul makes them fufceptible of impreffion, and when experience only can guide, and teach them what is right. Her few years made her ignorant of that experience, and unfufpicious parents faw not your invidious defigns. It was this period you chofe for your villainy. You interpofed ere the laws of right and wrong, and the nice boundaries of virtue and pru- dence, were eftablifhed. You laid your plans with fubtlety, and concealed them with hypocrify. Was there never a time when your heart checked you? Could neither youth, beauty, nor innocence find a momentary fr>end in your thoughts ? Did you never dread the refentment of her friends, and the contempt of the world ? Were your diflionourable vices only permanent, and your good refolutions tranfitory ? Your conduct has fhewn that they were. To feel " another's woe," was no lefTon of yours. Your object was the gratification of lawlefs pafiion, and you chofe to forget that your duty was to reftrain pafiion by reafon, character, humanity, and confcience. You FUGITIVE PIECES. 555 You knew that this daughter was the only one of a numerous family. She was the fole comfort of her aged parents ; and the anxious folicitude for her hap- pinefs, to them made life defirable. The horrors of their fituation are not to be defcribed ; and, in all probability, before this reaches you, they are incapa- ble of reproach for your bafenefs. Think on this mournful calamity, and let it lead you to penitence and amendment. Penfive moments will come to make you wretched The days of feem- ing profperity will wear to an end A cloud of mifery hangs over your head, to darken the gloomy days of remorfe ; and, when thofe come, you will be the firft to pronounce that you are unfit to live and the lajl %t> think that you are ready to die. C. C. S I R, Nov. 30. 1789. JLA.T an early period of life I fettled on a paternal farm, and have feldom made excurfions beyond my own parifh. My independence, fmall as it is, has procured me the appellation of Efquire from fome who wiih to flatter my vanity, and raife ideas of my own confequence j a title (by the way) which nothing, in thefe days of taxation, but a ftricl atten- tion to the duties of a farmer, and domeflic econo- my, could have enabled me to fupport fo long. I fay 5 6 FUGITIVE PIECES. fey this for the fake of forne of my neighbours, who feem to think attention and economy not at all ne- eefiary for one who has the appellation of a Gentle- man. I wifh they may attend to this friendly hint, before they are utifquired for ever, or if they ihould continue to be called Gentlemen, it will only be in jeft. The pride of a quondam gentleman reduced to poverty by his extravagance and vices, and claiming importance from his plea of blood, is of all vanities the moft filly and contemptible. It is generally recei- ved by the world with a fneer. Even the lineal reprefentative of the proud blood of Utnfreville, we were informed, expired a few days ago in a poor's-houfe *. What a IciTon of humility to the weak afTuming pride of man ! We are all the mere dependent craving creditors of Nature, and were fhe to deny the fupplies of vegeta- tion to this globe even for one year, the whole race of men and animals would be extirpated. He who raifes one blade of grafs where none grew before, is of more nfe to mankind than all the gay fons and daughters of folly, But to be profligate and diffipated, I perceive, is by many confidered as a mark to diftinguifh them as fafhionable gentlemen. Sequeftrated from the gay and fafliionable fcenes of the world, it is not to be wondered at, that I fhould be . * Edinburgh Evening Courant, Nov. 1789. FUGITIVE PIECES. 257 be ignorant of thofe forms of behaviour, and modes of expreffion, which prevail in the circles to which I have been fo long a ftranger. I was called to town on exprefs bufinefc about the time of your laft races. In many companies I heard of noble fellows^ and d rid clever fellows, terms which excited my curiofity, but when I came into com- pany with them, I found in general they were either abandoned rakes infidel witlings or what in the country we fhould call profelTed blackguards. Honeft fouls I found to be thofe animals who confi- der drinking as the great end of their exiftence. A fine preacher , one who deals in luminous words, but who fays nothing to inftrul the ferioas, or re- claim the unthinking. A good man y in the military, political, mercantile, and moral fenfe of the words, was totally different, and many were called good men, without any title to the moral fenfe of the term. A man of fa/hion I had always considered as a pat- tern of dignity of manners, and propriety of conduct. ;~^But no fuch thing. It means one who fquanders his time and money in frippery, folly, and abfurdity ; who frequents the tavern, and playhoufe when the play is near done ; who changes the drefs of his hair, K k and 258 FUGITIVE PIECES. and the fhape of his coat, every week, as verfatile fa- fliion varies. A man that has no foul, I found to be one who ob- ferves the laws of God is temperate, juft, and at- tentive to the ufeful employment of time. A man that has a foul one who gallops in the career of vice, folly, and extravagance of every kind who has no principle of action but fenfuality no purfuit but felf-indulgence and vanity. To live in Jlile y is to carry every fafhionable folly to the extreme ; tojport a fine carriage, with foot- men drefled like Harlequins ; to be bufily idle in the purfuit of fhow, drefs, the luxury of the table, and public and private amufements , in fliort, to be as unthinking and irrational as poffible to get into debt and at laft to die like a dog. Now, Sir, as that is not my ftile, I am hurrying as faft as poffible to the country, where words and characters retain their original meaning. I go to at- tend to the affairs of my farm and my family; to converfe at leifure hours with fome felect friends, a- mong whom I reckon the worthy clergyman of my parifh. To them my houfe is always open, and in fuch fociety I envy not the gay fafliionable life of your fplendid city. There FUGITIVE PIECES. 259 TJiere, from ways of mertlay'd fafe afliore, We fmile to hear the diftant tempeft roar. There, blefs'd with health, with folly unperplex'd, This life we relifli, and enfure the next. I am, &c. PETER PEASCOD of Thorny Braes. Edin. Nov. 30. 1789. SIR, Edin. May 24. 1790. A. FEW evenings ago I happened to fup at a friend's houfe, where the cpnverfation turned upon duelling, a fubject which has much ingrofled the attention for fome time paft *. In the courfe of the converfation, a gentleman gave an account of a very extraordinary duel, which happened a few years fince, and which, as it exhibited a curious contraft of character in the parties concerned, I think fhould be given to the public. I fhall give it you as nearly as I can recoi- led it 1 am, &c. VERIDICUS. * The fatal duel between Mr Macrae and Sir George Ramfay had tiken place a little time before. CAPTAIN 260 FUGITIVE PIECES. CAPTAIN WILD AIR had been early introduced into life had been in Germany in the former war, had witneffed fome alarms on the coaft of France, and vifited the Weft Indies , in his military capacity. Nature had formed him tall and robuft, and to thefe natural endowments, he thought his profeffion re- quired of him to look fierce, and to talk as a man of matchlefs intrepidity ; and he was happily furnifhed with an uncommon fhare of afTurance and arrogance for fupporting the character which he wilhed to af- iume. When he met with perfons of gentlenefs and modefty, he never failed to treat them with petu- lance, or infolent contempt. He was fpecious in con- verfation ; and though he had read little, and thought lefs, yet he pafTed in mixed company as a man of more than ordinary talents. He pofTefTed a considerable fhare of addrefs, and no man talked in higher terms of his fenfe of honour, and the principles of a gentlman j but his mind was a ftranger to the ties of moral obligation, and his heart to the feelings of humanity and benevolence. To be a proficient in fafhionable vices to pay tavern bills and game debts (when he could not help it), with a feeming indifference, were with him the eiTential qua- lifications of a gentleman. His fyftem offavoir vivre was like that of Lord Chefterfield, to pafs a counter for fterling money, or to appear what he was not, to ferve his own purpofes. He was fond of cards, but had frequent occafions to make apologies for mif- takes, though it is not known that his hand was ever pinned FUGITIVE PIECES. 36* pinned to the table. His athletic appearance, and the renown of his gallantries, it is faid, did more in, promoting his pecuniary intereft than his military iervices had done for his promotion in the army. He could talk of fighting duels, with as much uncon- cern as people generally talk of playing at draughts or backgammon. In the zenith of his bonne fortune in London, he kept or rather a carriage was kept for him. He availed himfelf of his fituation, and appeared at all the fafhionable clubs at the weft end of the town. He happened one day to dine with a party at the Britifh Coffeehoufe, where a Mr Manly, lately ar- rived from Jamaica, was prefent. Unlike the climate he had left, there was no vio- lent heat in the temperature of Mr Manly's mind. It was all mildnefs and gentlenefs, and he pofleffed an uncommon fhare of the " milk of human kind- nefs." He never had recourfe to deception in his in- tercourfe with mankind, and his politenefs flowed from the genuine dictates of a benevolent heart. He confidered that the merit of actions depended on the motives which prompted them ; and he believed every man honeft till he found him a knave. He was the very kind of man the Captain liked to trample on, and he failed not to do it. After dinner, much at- tention was paid to Mr Manly, and many enquiries made Concerning Jamaica. The Captain found him- felf not of that importance which he wifhed to be held 262 FUGITIVE PIECES. in, and with a pardon me, Sir, I have been in Ja- maica as well as you, he told Mr Manly, what he faid was not fo. This was received with great good nature ; but in the courfe of the enquiries by the company, the Captain contradicted Mr Manly on e very point, and at laft gave him the lie direct. Impudence and violence will often brow-beat mo- defty and worth, whofe only fhelter on fuch occa- fions is in filence or retirement. Mr Manly funk filent and confounded. The Captain crefted and triumphed talked loud, and looked confequential. The company,' uneafy at what had patted, changed the converfation ; and when they were clofely en- gaged, Mr Manly took occafion to whifper in the Captain's ear, that he would call on him early the next morning. The Captain gave a flight bow of affected politenefs, and the general converfation went on. The Captain continued the hero of the after- noon fought over his battles and his duels boafl- ed of the many fine girls he had feduced, and the arts he had ufed to cheat unfufpecting parents, &c. &:c. till the hour of the Opera arrived, and his car- riage was announced. He foon after rofe from table to put on his fword, which flood in the corner ; and approaching the company, he drew it from the fcab- bard. " There, fays he, Gentlemen, is a bit of the beft tempered fteel in Europe. With that fword I have fought nine duels, and each time it was through the body of my antagonift." He caft a fide glance at Mr Manly, whofe eyes were fixed on the ground ; and FUGITIVE PIECES. 263 and then, with an air of affected indifference, wifhed the company good night. The waiters, who had heard of his killing nine people in duels, buftled with uncommon activity to make way for the Captain, while he d n'd them for lazy inattentive fcoun- drels. Mr Manly failed not to call upon Captain Wild- air early the next morning, with his piftols in his pocket. As he approached the houfe, he perceived a footman eyeing him from a fide window. After re- peated knocking, the door was opened, and Mr Man- ly demanded to fpeak immediately with Captain Wild- air. The footman anfwered, that his matter could not be difturbed at fo early an hour ; that he had been late out at a card party, and it was more than his place was worth to call the Captain at that time. Mr Manly replied, that he muft then call the Cap- tain himfelf, his buiinefs was exprefs, and would admit of no delay. He was then fhown into a par- lour by the footman, muttering. He had taken many turns through the room, when he heard the Cap- tain's voice from the firft floor, calling to his fervant below to inform the gentleman that he would be with him prefently, and if there were no books in the parlour, to go to the library and fetch fome for the gentleman's amufement. This induced Mr Manly to look at fome books which lay on the chimney- piece. The firft he opened was a new bound copy of Sherlock on Death. He laid it down, and took the next, which was a Prayer Book, with a mark at the 464 FUGITIVE PIECES. the Funeral Service. Not relifhing thefe books, which had been provided for his amufement, he tried a third. It was Ranby on Gun-Shot Wounds ; and the only remaining one being looked into, it proved to be Collier on the Unlawfulnefs of Duelling. Not wifh- ing to indulge himfelf in fuch fpeculations, he pur- fued his own thoughts. In fomewhat more than half an hour the Captain entered, in his night gown and flippers, with a pair of piftols in his hand. With a flight bow, and fafhionable nonchalance, he faid : Your fervant, Sir ; you fee I underftand the pur- port of your call (laying the piftols on the table). There they are, Sir, hair trigger'd, made by Wog- den, under my own directions, and furer things ne- ver were fnapped^ Sir, faid Mr Manly, you have rightly interpreted my call ; it is to demand fatisfac- tion for your infolent treatment of me yefterday. O \ my dear Sir, replied the Captain (buttoning the knee of his breeches), don't difturb yourfelf, you fliall have it. Here, John, bring me the new caft balls, the glazed powder, and other materials I ufe upon fuch occafions. Pray, Mr Manly, may I afk you how many affairs of honour you have had in your life ? Sir, replied Mr Manly, I know not what you call ho- nour. I think it difhonourable to infult or injure any man, and where no fuch thing is meant, a man of honour will with candour acknowledge the miftake j but your behaviour was that of marked and continu- ed infolence, and it obliges me to call but a perfony for the firft time in my life. Thefe matters are as gentlemen may feel, laid the Captain. And fo this FUGITIVE PIECES. 26*5 this is the firft time you have tried ;the field, Mr Manly ! Believe me, when you have been there as of- ten as I have, you'll think nothing of it, Sir. At this time John arrived with the new caft balls, gla- zed powder, and fome pieces of greafed linen cloth. There, fays the Captain, applying one of the balls to the muzzle of Wogden's piftol, you fee, Sir, there can be no windage here, it is this makes fire-arms certain. Do you know, Sir, I can hit the ace of clubs five times in fix with thefe little fellows, in any man- ner of charging ; and I never knew this powder once mifgive in my life. Mr Manly urged their departure. The Captain told John he fhould breakfaft at the Coffeehoufe would be home to drefs at five, and would want the carriage at Lord B 's at three next morning. He then left the houfe, humming the tune of The Britijb Grenadiers, and they took a hackney coach to Hyde Park. As they drove along the ftreets, the Captain remarked on the wonderful improvements of late years T The opening to the Green Park was beautiful, and the diftant view of Weftminfter Abbey was fublime J When they entered Hyde Park, the Captain aflced Mr Manly what diftance he chofe to fight at ? He was anfwered, At the ufual diftance. "What, twelve paces ! exclaimed the Captain No, Sir, I am more of a man of honour than to take fuck an advantage Diftance to me, with thefe hair-trigger'd piftols, is of little confequence j but it is a material affair for you LI the 266 FUGITIVE PIECES. firft time of your being on the field, and with fuch. arms We fliall fire at three paces, Sir, and then you may have fome chance My honour tells me it is my duty to propofe this ; for, at twelve paces, I trould pick a button from your waiftcoat, or touch any rib of your ilde but, with your inexperience and arms, I fhould be in perfect fafety. Let it be three, or don't fight, Mr Manly I may afterwards be blamed for not giving a fair chance, as I am well known in the field of honour. When they reached the ground, they found two gentlemen awaiting them, who had been of the com- pany the day before. The Captain infifled on fight- ing at three paces, from the motive of fairnefs and honour. Mr Manly in a firm tone, defired he would take his diftancc at twelve paces, as had been decid- ed. The Captain then ftept off twelve paces, and faid he would fhow him how impracticable it was to touch him ; and, turning round en militaire, he faid, Mr Manly, are you refolved to go on with this bufi- nefs ? Certainly, Sir, replied Mr Manly, keep you? ground, and let it be decided inftantly. The Captain inclining his head to one fide, and af- fecting a fmile, threw away his hair-trigger'd piftol, and clafping his hands together, exclaimed, God for- bid that I fhould raife my arm againft fo noble a fel- low ! Then, walking quickly up to Mr Manly, he faid, Sir, I have tried your courage, and have found you a man of honour. What is this to the purpofe, faid FUGITIVE PIECES. 267 laid Mr Manly, who is he that doubted it ? Sir, if you mean not to refume your piftol and your ground, you mufl beg pardon of me in the company before whom you gave the offence. Yes, Sir, before the whole world, anfwered the Captain, rather than in- jure fuch a man as you are! I will tell them what a inan I have found, and how much I efleem him. Sir, faid Mr Manly, I now perceive your train of artifice, and I defpife it. I have no deilre to hurt any man, or to hazard the life even of one who does not deferve the name. Learn to act from principles becoming a man, and attempt not to gain reputation by appearing what you are not. Injure not the rights of others, nor encroach on that civility which is due to every perlbn, who does not offend ag-ainft the laws of virtue and good breeding. He only is a gentle- man who acls from motives of probity and good will to mankind; and the man who does fo, will never have occafion to fight a duel. Remember your engagement, and I will not hurt your feelings, by mentioning the conferences of a failure. Captain Wildair met the company at the appoint- ed time, acknowledged his fault, and begged pardon of Mr Manly. The converfation that day took a very different turn from that of the former meeting. The Captain did not entertain them with any more ac- counts of his duels, or exploits of his gallantry. He was humble, attentive, and polite, while he remained, but fought an early opportunity of retiring on parti- cular 268 FUGITIVE PIECES. cular bufinefs, and never again joined that com- pany. SIR Edinburgh} J.T is often no lefs ufeful than entertaining to collect facts which might otherwife pafs unnoticed,'and to pre- fent them to obfervation in one connected view. Such a plan may frequently lead to refearch and inveftiga- tion, which Scattered facts faintly remembered would liot have fuggefted. Some years ago we had a curi- ous collection of facts refpecting the progrefs of focie- ty, trade, and manners in Edinburgh from 1763 to 1783; and might not a collection of facts be alfo made from time to time, refpecting the phyfical world as well as the moral and political ? It is obvious that this globe which we inhabit has undergone great and aftonifhing revolutions. It is certain that the land we now occupy has once been covered by the fea, for the higheft mountains are re- plete with marine productions. * That many of the rocks and mountains which we fee, muft have been occafioned by fubterraneous fire, no perfon can doubt. For inftance, the bafaltic co- lumns of the Giants caufeway, the ifland of Staffa, the FUGITIVE PIECES. 26$ the rocks at the harbour of Dunbar, the hills of Ar- thur's Seat and Craiglockhart*, and many others, too tedious to mention. Thefe are only named as being more immediately under obfervation. Nothing can account for the regular form which thefe rocks have taken, but their being produced by fire, and this is fupported by experiment. It has late- ly been found that when fimilar fubftances are brought into fufion, and allowed to cool gradually, they af- fume the fame regular fhape as thefe columns of rock. Some time ago, a furnace of flint glafs having been by accident allowed to cool, the matter was found to have taken the form of bafaltic columns. The great procefles of nature, and the tremendous changes that have taken place in this globe, we have but very little knowledge of, owing to the remote an- tiquity of the events, or the fhort period and imper- fection of our records. We now know of volcanos as far to the North and South Poles as land has been difcovered; and through the intervening latitudes from pole to pole. It would hence appear, that there is a great body of aftive fire within the bowels of this earth j and we know the effects of it often appear at immenfe diftances, and that it acts in a manner which cannot, or has not yet * Thefe hills are in the clofe neighbourhood of Edinburgh. 2 7 o FUGITIVE PIECES. yet been accounted for. Volcanos, we alfo know, have difappeared in one place, and have burft out in another ; and that every part of the globe is fubject to fuch convulfions of Nature. The northern part of this ifland of Britain has not within the record of hiftory been fubject to any re- markable phyfical change or revolution, although it is evident that fuch changes and revolutions have hap- pened in it. The following recent fac>s, however^ may not perhaps be thought unworthy of remark, and a few facts are of more value than a thoufand hypothefes. In 1782, at the time of the dreadful earthquakes! in Calabria, the Mercury in the barometer in Scot- land funk within a tenth of an inch of the bottom of the fcale ; the waters in many of the lochs or lakes in the Highlands were much agitated. In 1783 There was an immenfe volcanic erup- tion in the northern ifland of Iceland, which began on the lothof June, and continued till the middle of Auguft. A new ifland was thrown up in the neigh- bouring fea, and again difappeared. Several months previous to this eruption, a heavy dark bluifh fulphureous fog had been obferved to reft over the ifland when not difllpated by the wind ; this fog, at times, was fpread all over Europe. The year before this eruption, and a few months before the earthquakes FUGITIVE PIECES. 271 earthquakes in Calabria, the influenza (a diforder hitherto unaccounted for)fpread through Europe. This volcanic eruption in Iceland is perhaps the moft re- markable yet recorded in hiftory. One ftream of burn- ing lava extended 40 miles in length, and 1 6 in breadth, and was in fqme places between 4 and 500 feet deep !* Upon the i8th of Auguft 1783 A remarkable meteor or bail of fire was ieen to pafs from north to fouth, about half paft eight in the evening. This meteor was feen all over Britain, and in many places upon the continent of Europe. This phenomenon happened much about the time of the termination of the volcanic eruption in Iceland, and it is remark- able, that this meteor was firft feen to the north-weft of the Shetland and Orkney iflands, in the quarter of Iceland. Upon the 1 2th of September 1784 A very extra- ordinary phenomenon was obferved at Loch Tay. The air was perfectly calm, not a breath of wind ftir- ring. About nine o'clock in the morning, the water at the eaft end of the loch ebbed about 300 feet, and left the channel dry. It gradually accumulated and rol- led on about 300 feet farther to the weftward, when it met a fimilar wave rolling in a contrary direction. When thefe waves met, they rofe to a perpendicular height of five or fix feet, producing a white foam upon the * The account of this eruption is, fince the above wag printed, re- corded in the Philofophical Tranfa&ions of Edinburgh. 27 2 FUGITIVE PIECES. the top. The water then took a lateral diredlion fouth- ward, rufhing to the fhore, and ruing upon it four feet beyond the higheft water mark. It then returned, and continued to ebb and flow every feven minutes for two hours, the waves gradually diminifhing every time they reached the fhore, until the whole was quiefcent. During the whole of that week, at a later hour in the morning, there was the fame appearance, but not with fuch violence. Upon the r ith of March 1 785 The Tiviot, a large fiver in the fouth of Scotland, fuddenly difappeared, and left the channel dry for two hours, and then, flowed with its ufual fulnefs. Upon the 1 6th of June 1786 A fmart {hock of an earthquake was felt at Whitehaven, in Cumber r land, which extended to the Ifle of Man and Dublin, and was alfo felt in the fouth-weft parts of Scot- land. Upon the i ith of Auguft 1786 A very alarming fhock of an earthquake was felt about two o'clock in the morning, in the north of England, viz. Nor- thumberland, Cumberland, and in Scotland, acrofs the ifland, as far north as Argylefhire, and in all thefe places at the fame inftant of time. This fliock ex- tended above 150 miles from fouth to north, and joo miles from eaft to weft. Whatever FUGITIVE PIECES. 273 What an immenfe power it muft have been to have produced fuch an effect ! Upon the 6th of January 1787 A fmart fliock of an earthquake was felt in the parifhes of Campfie and Strathblane, ten miles north of Glafgow, about ten o'clock in the morning. A rivulet which turns the mills became dry in feveral places. A rufhing noife was heard to precede the fhock from the fouth- eaft. The night preceding this earthquake, a piece of ground near Alloa, on which a mill was built, fud- denly funk a foot and a half. Upon the 26th of January, the river Clyde, above Lanark, became almoft dry for two hours, fo as to ftop the mills ; and again flowed as ufual. Upon the 25th of January 1 787 The river Tiviot again became fuddenly dry, and continued fo for four hours, and then flowed with its ufual fulnefs. In 1787 The months of January and February were uncommonly mild ; the thermometer at Edin- burgh being in general about 20 degrees higher than ufual at that feafon. Upon the I2th of February 1787 The mercury in the barometer at Edinburgh was nearly as low as at the time of the earthquakes in Calabria. Mm On 274 FUGITIVE PIECES. On the 8th of July 1788 The fea at Dunbar fud- denly receded eighteen inches. On the 1 3th July 1788 An earthquake was felt at the Me of Man. In September 1789 There was a violent earth- quake in Iceland *. OnThurfday the 5th of November 1789, between five and fix in the evening, a finart fliock of an earth- quake was felt at CriefF, at Comrie, and for many miles round that diftricl, which is about fifty miles from Edinburgh. At Major Robertfon's houfe of Lawers, a rumbling noife, like diftant thunder, had been heard at intervals for two months j and at the time of the (hock, a noife like the difcharge of diftant artillery was diftinc~lly heard. MefT. D s and B ce of Edinburgh were ftanding before the fire in the drawing-room, and they defcribed the fhock, as if a great mallet had fuddenly ftruck the foundation of the houfe with violence. At the village of Comrie, the inhabitants left their houles, and ran to the open fields. On the i ith of November, in the forenoon, in the fame place, another fhock was felt, and more violent than that of the 5th. It was accompanied with a * See Letter from Copenhagen, O<51. 6. J789> publilhed in the ncwfpapen about the end of O&ober. hollow FUGITIVE PIECES. 275 hollow rumbling noife. The ice on a piece of water near the houfe of Lawers was fhivered to atoms *. Extract of a letter from Florence, OB. 2. 1789. " We have received the melancholy intelligence, that, on the 3oth of September, at three quarters af- ter eleven o'clock in the morning, a violent fhock of an earthquake was felt in the town of Borgo San Se- polcro, which lafted two minutes. The cathedral was partly deftroyed, and fome churches, with many houfes and palaces, entirely fo. In a village five miles from Borgo San Sepolcro, the earth opened and fwal- lowed up above thirty houfes, with all their inhabi- tants ; and the remainder of that village, confifting of above 150 houfes, was totally deftroyed : The earth there opened in many different places, and a great quantity of cattle have perifhed, befides above 1000 perfons f ." It is very extraordinary that on the fame day, viz. the 30th of September, near three o'clock in the af- ternoon, two or three diftinct fhocks of an earth- quake were felt at the houfe of Parfons Green, with- in a mile of Edinburgh. The houfe is fituated on the north fide of the hill called Arthur's Seat, which is compofed of an immenfe mafs of blue granite. Several vifitors were in the houfe to dine with the fa- mily, and the whole company ran down flairs from * See the Edinburgh papers of the above date, t London Chronicle, 0 FINIS, This b^Jt is DUE on the last ^stamped below RFC MAIN LOAN AUG A.M. 5m-6,'41(3644) : ! v E D DESK 7 1964; ; P.M. 2JH2I3I4I5I6 OUIVERSITYoi CALIFORNIA AT