lip m^ m !m?iii'nij !l|iiii: Digitized by the Internet Archive in 2007 with funding from IVIicrosoft Corporation http://www.archive.org/details/cornerstoneofeduOOIyttrich THE CORNER-STONE OF EDUCATION By EDWARD LYTTELTON, D.D. MOTHERS AND SONS TRAINING OF THE YOUNG IN LAWS OF SEX THE SERMON ON THE MOUNT SCHOOLBOYS AND SCHOOL WORK CHARACTER AND RELIGION THE CORNER-STONE OF EDUCATION AN ESSAY ON THE HOME TRAINING OF CHILDREN BY EDWARD LYTTELTON, D.D. HEADMASTER OF ETON Thus it is plainly conceivable that creatures without blemish as they came out of the hands of God, may be in danger of going wrong ; and so may stand in need of the security of virtuous habits additional to the moral principle wrought into their natures by Him. Bishop Butler The youth, who daily farther from the east Must travel, still is Nature's priest. Wordsworth. LONDON AND NEW YORK G. P. PUTNAM'S SONS 1914 Li First Published March 1914 PRINTED AT THE BALLANTYNE PRESS LONDON TO MY FRIEND AND FELLOW LABOURER H. M. BURGE LORD BISHOP OF SOUTHWARK, LATE HEADMASTER OF WINCHESTER COLLEGE, THIS BOOK IS DEDICATED WITH RESPECT AND GRATEFUL AFFECTION 297568 CONTENTS CHAPTER PAGE I. THE PROBLEM STATED ii II. THE HALCYON DAYS 34 III. THE PLACE OF STIMULUS 59 IV. CHRIST AND THE CHILD-MIND 68 V. DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 85 VI. TYPES OF FAILURE 119 VII. WHERE IS THE SOURCE OF VIRTUE ? 156 VIII. TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 168 IX. PERSPECTIVE AND FREEDOM 228 PREFACE ^TpHIS book has been undertaken owing to a request made that I should write on the special subject of the " moral " temptations of boyhood. I began hy trying to show how it is a part of general moral training. But the inquiry soon led into the deeper question. On what is character built ? or what is the founda- tion of a training in virtue ? This is my subject, the more limited one being excluded. Further, I have been obliged to leave on one side the question between the collective (or ecclesiastical) and the individual side of training ; also the intellectual and artistic elements in education. As an excuse for the lack of conciseness, and a certain amount of repetition, I must plead manifold interruptions. What there is of truth in the message I offer to all those who are engaged in home training of children, and commend this essay to them in a spirit of hearty fellowship and good-will. E. L. Eton, February 1914. I : THE PROBLEM STATED ^T^HE problem before us is the determining of the parents' part in forming the character of their children. Character ! WTiat mysteries are called up in the mind by the mere word ! Nobody can define it, yet the thing is an unfailing source of interest and desire. No book is dull which deals with the development of character, even in a fictitious person : at least, if it is, it betokens something of a triumph of dull- ness in the writer. But in regard to oxir own children the mystery and the interest are alike deepened, and there is, or ought to be, no limit to our desire. For everybody knows something about goodness, and every one who is not de- humanized earnestly desires goodness for his own offspring. But it is, I believe, not uncommon for people to be almost paralyzed in their endeavour to secure this end, by the complexity of the mystery. The bewildering conflict between Creationism and Traducianism is vnih us stiU. That is to say while some regard a new-born soul as a new and unique product of the Creator's 12 HOME TRAINING [i power, independent, as to its qualities, of all living beings that have lived their lives on this earth ; others are swayed by the theory of Heredity, and start by believing that every child's mind and sovd is a fixed predetermined product of his ancestry. Who can forecast the solution of this dispute ? But as long as it continues it is not clear that any father or mother can be assured that they are doing right from the very start of their training of their own child.* Yet while this and much more might be said in support of the idea that character-building is mostly pure guesswork, I wish to say as emphatic- I ally as I can that in an immense number of cases !the products of home training reveal by their fcharacters the principles on which they have been trained : and that this is true alike of good and bad. I will not say in all cases, because there are freaks — startling and unaccountable characters which have developed quite contrary to all expec- tations and apparently contrary to all rule. But in the enormous majority of instances it is not so. , The practice of certain principles in the home 'I makes for the growth of a certain kind of character * An important discussion of this subject is to be found in Mastensen's "Christian Dogmatics" (T. & T. Clark, Edinburgh), P- Hi> § 74- i] THE PROBLEM STATED 13 in the children, in the direction either of virtue or selfishness, of service or isolation, of weal or woe. However much or little assent the above pro- position may win, I feel bound to repeat it in more precise terms. It is one of the many rewards of the schoolmaster's profession that he gains — or ought to gain — an insight into the real quality of home-life. He can judge it by its earliest product. If the study of that product teaches him the main truth on which the best homes live and thrive, he learns something rich and nourishing, which it is his duty to pass on to others. No less clearly does that truth stand out when the results of ignoring it, or of obeying it half-heartedly, are noted. It comes to this : Good home-training means bringing up children in surroundings which quietly and persistently illustrate the principles taught by word of mouth : where unselfishness is not only heard of but seen every day. If the surroundings are consistent and of one type, the character which results in the children is as a rule not only admirable but win- ning ; '' lovely and of good report." Again, where youth ends in moral collapse, or decorous selfishness, it is nearly always the case that the principles taught by the parents have been plainly 14 HOME TRAINING [i contravened by the life lived. Thirdly, where adolescence issues in a familiar blend of pleasure- seeking which persists through manhood, and the sort of dutifulness which always stops short of self-sacrifice, we can trace the direct outcome of a double-minded home : where some right principles have been taught, but only sometimes with conviction, and only obeyed when conven- tion demands that they should be. I hold it to be quite undeniable that whether the results of home-training are good or bad or mixed, they generally form a clear index of what the essential quality of the home has been. Now as this is so, a duty of quite inexpressible I gravity rests upon parents to make clear to them- selves, as far as in them lies, what these principles are, and in what the practice of them consists. We are beset nowadays by an ineradicable belief in the value of human life and the eternal nature |of the issues to which it leads. How can any Iwords, then, overstate the responsibility of those ^ who by their own act bring souls into the world : into this phantasmagoric scene of bliss and misery, darkness and light, which with all its uncertainties gives the deep impression of being a time of probation for something far more blissful or far more miserable still ? i] THE PROBLEM STATED 15 But as soon as this has been said the reader is likely to be taken with a certain weariness of the whole subject. He may admit the importance of the matter, but will quail before the increasing load of social activities to which he is called. Every sort of useful life requires, we are told, \ more energy than formerly, and more time. Any- how, for men who are concerned for their country's welfare the giving of attention to home-training is becoming less and less possible, and even f or f women more difficult than it was. This contention cannot be wholly set aside. It is very easy to drift into a set of activities, in answer to professional claims or social needs, so strenuous as to leave no time for anything else whatever : and it is very commonly done. But the facts make no sort of difference to the primacy of the home. That is where it was. We are confronted with far more claims than our fore- fathers were, or anyhow so we believe. On the threshold of life's prime every sane man measures these claims according to his powers. His first duty is to see how much of his care is needed for ;• the welfare of his children, and then to give it, / undistracted by any other call, to serve his fellow { men. Moreover, if the nature of our duty to our i6 HOME TRAINING [i children be carefully considered it will be found to require a certain spirit, and but strangely little of time, of anxiety and stress than is commonly supposed. If this were otherwise the problem would be too much for us. But we shall see that it is not so. In broad outline the problem may be thus stated : A child is born to all appearances a helpless animal ; but we know that on the tabula rasa of his mind may be impressed a certain view or interpretation of life, which in all normal cases will be the outcome of his experiences ; what he finds life to be. Further, that according to that view will be his dealing with his inclinations towards self-assertion which as he grows will take, roughly speaking, one of two forms : pride or sensuality. Hence it is the parents' duty to ensure that his experience will start him off on life's journey with a true view of its meaning and its issues. If that is wrong nothing will go right. For this end they may adopt various means, the chief of which will be providing the child with a certain environment, and after they have seen to his physical needs leaving him a good deal alone. Occasionally they will interfere by precept and positive guidance. i] THE PROBLEM STATED 17 What happens ? For a few months the infant develops like the young of other animals, con- scious, first and foremost, as far as we know, of his appetites and of nothing else. But after a time it becomes clear that something has lifted him above this animal level and given him a sense of a life higher than his own. As far as we can tell, this change is due to the knowledge of his father's and mother's love, which shows itself not so much by endearments — though they have their place — as by the right sort of interference which we call discipline. Then begins the up- lifting process due to law and love^ and from that time onwards the child looks up instead of down, and becomes a human being. In proof of this assertion we find that in the slums of our towns, the children who know nothing of their parents except kicks and curses, remain animals for years, unless some one else shows them the meaning of life through the experience of law and love. The beginning of all true development is in the learn- ing of a truth. So things go on for a time ; a halcyon time of training, because every instinct in the parents and in the nurse too, combines towards the pro- vision of the right kind of experience in which the true relation to the parents is shown not only i8 HOME TRAINING [i by their affectionateness but by their guidance which helps to subordinate appetite to obedience. For even the most indulgent mothers check the formation of intolerable habits, and for a time the needful discipline is sure to be pro- vided ; and so the development is orderly and easy. But some disturbing symptoms soon appear. For instance, if the child sees his parents quarrel he begins to conceive of life as a scene whence love is banished. If, later, his parents' relation to law seems a confused and fitful thing, his own idea of law becomes blurred and feeble, and as it becomes, or remains, feeble, it gives place to another very different one ; the idea of obeying inclination. Desires of various kinds are always present in him, and as time goes on they tend to increase in number and strength. Along with this, as the time for public school life draws on, personality asserts itself, antagonistic often to parental control : and then it is that to the young boy the life of his parents often shows itself as based very largely on self-pleasing tempered by social convention. That is its ordinary aspect as viewed from below, since in England, at any rate, it is common for parents to conceal their higher motives of conduct from their children, i] THE PROBLEM STATED 19 as well as from their neighbours. Adults can perhaps divine these motives, and the best of them do so : but the growing boy judges by experiences, and those which, as far as he can interpret them, tend to destroy the idea that life is a harmony, are not rare. Unless he is an idiot he is bound to construct some theory as to the motives of his parents when they interfere with his own desires ; also as to their main activities : what are they at ? What is their purpose in doing what they do ? Supposing, then, that the father's life wears the appearance of being mainly concerned with getting, and the mother's to be guided by social convention or ambition, there is little hope that the boy will grow into the perception of a higher law dominating his elders, and yet in harmony vdth that early law of obedience which he was beginning at one time to understand and practise. So a history opens more tragic by far than it appears to be ; life is before the boy with wondrous potentialities of happiness and well- doing. Of course if any reader of these pages does not know that, the subject with which we are engaged must be dull. But I am building on that teaching of the Sermon on the Mount which has been echoed and practised in countless 20 HOME TRAINING [i lives since the opening words were spoken. They told mankind that, no matter what buffetings and weariness, what disabilities, what cruelties and failure were in store for each one, blissful life was and is a possibility for all : but that every- thing depends on the true relation between man and his Maker being apprehended and actually lived. In short, for every child development depends on the taking in of Truth. But clearly this apprehension is not a process that can be taken for granted. Practically it is never begun without being definitely taught : and teaching for such a pupil as an ordinary child means teaching not only by precept, but by all possible means summed up in our pregnant words Example and Surroundings. More than that : the two latter elements in home-training are vastly more potent for weal or woe than the former. Supposing, then, that the surroundings of the child's life bring home to him day by day the fact that his parents, to whom he owes all life and health and happiness, are themselves obedient to the dictates of a life higher than that which is seen, he grows up filled with reverence for law and quickened by the encompassing power of love. If the surroundings suggest anything else what- i] THE PROBLEM STATED 21 ever, the child is bound to infer that, for him too, obedience will in time give place to something else : and that can only be the following of inclination. We all know how prone children are to imagine that adult life means release from law : that is, they think of law as something to which a temporary respect has for some inscrutable reason to be paid. In other words a boy's inter- pretation of life is built upon a foundation which is itself shifting, disordered and unintelligible. We shall consider in the following pages of this book what this state of things means in actual practice : how far meantime it is affected by the intrusion of convention or public opinion among the forces which have to be obeyed. But among the facts which under certain common conditions make for disorder and bewilderment the most telling of all has yet to be mentioned. We are supposing a home in which early obedience to law ends in nothing particular, because the parents' life exhibits to the child little or no conformity to a higher law, little or no perception of an encompassing love. If the parents' lives are as they sometimes are, con- sistently selfish, the child's life, in so far as the home shapes it, is bound to be selfish too. It is purely a matter of temperament whether it is 22 HOME TRAINING [i governed by sensuality or pride, whether it heads straight for a moral scandal, or for a far more deadly subservience to public opinion issuing in decorum. But generally the selfishness of the parents is not consistent, but fitful and rather timid, and of course very perplexing to the child to interpret. Into these random uncertainties there comes religion. Of all the influences which have yet been considered, this is the most dis- ordering. Why ? Religion is generally taught to the child as a series of maxims nominally bearing on daily life, and connected with the story of Jesus of Nazareth. So far, one would imagine, the lessons must tend to be bracing and wholesome. But the effect is very different if the maxims are ignored by the teachers, and the love of GOD, which the life of Christ is meant to illustrate, is disguised by the harshness of the moral law. That is to say, parents eager for propriety of conduct in their child secure it by constant interference in daily life, and at intervals insist on a religious observance which has no living meaning either for the child or for themselves ! This is to throw the precepts of the Gospel into the shade. For practical use they are not alluded to. In a home of the better sort they i] THE PROBLEM STATED 23 are trotted out at intervals, in a ceremonious fashion, but they are not explained so as to be understood. Meantime the religious observances introduce another bewilderment into the child's experience. All mention of GOD and of holy things is carefully stamped with unreality, because to the child the most serious matter in life,the con- flict with desire, wears a non-religious aspect and is in another department. Moreover it is in the nature of things that to the childish mind that which is invisible gradually becomes unreal. It is true that fancies about the world of fairies are common : but so is the experience which extin- guishes them ; and where is the guarantee that the thought of the unseen GOD does not dis- appear at the same time ? That is to say the mass of ideas which we call religious may be thought of as natural to a child, but only if taught in a natural way. Otherwise, all that he hears about religion adds another element of confusion in fundamentals. If it is not connected with his moral life, it is dead, flat, and unprofitable as the stories from the Metamorphoses of Ovid to a schoolboy of ten : and if its introduction is not followed by revolt, the reason is merely that he is becoming accustomed to chaos, and gradually giving up the attempt to interpret life at all* 24 HOME TRAINING [i Nor is the result any better if the mother, aware of this danger, vigorously undertakes to base her moral precepts upon those of the Gospel. I Not only are the latter far too difficult for the child, but the attempt connects the subject of religion with effort and with gloom. Moreover it renders it ineffectual as well as repellent : for it identifies the idea of GOD with that of a task- master who imposes tasks which every well- meaning child finds too hard for him. Thus the love of GOD is disguised under the harshness of the moral law, or made unreal by being dis- sociated from it. If it is believed that the harshness, i.e. the disciplinary element of religion, is essential because it is true, I would agree : but I would demur to any presentation of religion to a child which makes severity its deepest charac- teristic. We must not forget that all children are in quest of joy. That is a symptom of childhood, a natural and universal outcome of the early years, and it is that which Christ blessed when He said, " Of such is the king- dom of Heaven." He set His approval, not on children as many of us think they ought to be, but on children as they are. Well, then, they are all seekers of happiness : a fact which it is fatal for parents to ignore when they i] THE PROBLEM STATED 25 try to bring the idea of GOD into their child's mind. This, then, is the position. Failure in our highest endeavour is evidently easy because while common instincts urge us to surround the very early years with love and law, their meaning '^ dies into the light of common day " unless the parents show that they themselves in an intelligible way obey the same supreme influences. In trying to show this we teach religion, but only so as to deepen the confusion. Yet when any of us succeeds in the upbringing of a human soul, there is about it a kind of quiet and steadfast power not to be mistaken : a sove- reign simplicity which may be exacting indeed for those who practise it, but has in it nothing that is puzzling, or subtle, or perplexed. It is found to be just that which the child-mind demands : a child-like obedience on the part of father and mother to something infinitely above them ; so that life is conceived by the growing boy as a harmony in which the inspiration of the early years persists through all that come after. This, in all normal cases, happens according as the parents' lives are Godward ; that is in so far as they exhibit the true perspective of conduct : the dealing with passions and desires always 26 HOME TRAINING [i according to a higher law than that of incHna- tion : always in reference to a state of life more real than the " fleeting show " with which we are familiar, more abiding than that which is passing away. For parents, could anything be simpler or more exacting ? The chequered controversies about education are found to die down into one supreme question : What happens when the child begins to find mere dependence on his father and mother too little a thing for his growing self ? too finite a prescription for his soul's great longings ? Broadly speaking, it is one thing or the other : either the earthly law and love are a presentation, intelligible to a child, of the heavenly realities, or they are an utterly baffling experience of a guiding to something which is never clearly seen, never firmly spoken of, never lived or known. In the latter case life is to the boy an enigma, because its glory and grandeur are all blurred by practice denying precept, i.e, his parents' lives contradicting their teaching. So the early harmonies die away into distressful janglings. Meantime proofs of the wonder and power of the training which is sequent and self-consistent are before our eyes. Whether we judge from the i] THE PROBLEM STATED 27 principles of the matter or from practical results, we reach the same conviction. The child grows to be that which his view of life tells him to be : and he must form that view on his parents' sayings and doings. He is incurably rational, and if it were not so, all human society would dis- solve : that is to say if we bring before his eyes a picture of lives lived in discord with the ideal which we try to teach him, he rationally infers that he is brought into a world of chaos. What this comes to mean in his life I have tried to illustrate in this book. Two more remarks of an introductory character. We are dealing with an immense subject — the formation of human character in its earliest stages. There are some to whom the matter will seem very partially treated because little or nothing is said about the training of the intellect, ; the logical, the artistic and other faculties. I have not forgotten them, but have designedly omitted them from the following pages, because the subject of character-building is more than enough for one treatise. But in truth the moral and the intel- lectual are by no means so distinct as they are commonly supposed to be. When the Son of Sirach wrote, '' the fear of the Lord is all wisdom," or, as was said elsewhere, '' the beginning of 18 HOME TRAINING [i wisdom," it was not meant that a faculty like that for mathematics or engineering depends for its growth upon Theism or Christianity: but that the wise exercise of these and all other faculties depends from the beginning on the owner being moved and guided by a certain deep con- viction as to what this life of ours is. And more than this. Christ said the Holy Spirit would lead His followers " into all truth." That mighty promise assumes that there is a knowledge which is not only necessary, but essentially satisfying and sufficient, and which is given to man, as he becomes aware of his relation to his Maker. In other words, the greatest stimulus to the intellect is the conviction that life is throughout orderly and harmonious. Lastly, in a matter so central, so near to our deepest emotions and most sacred obligations as the forming of our own children's character, it is not likely that we should be free from the peril of deadly error. The graver the issue, the more likely it is that our efforts may be spoilt by some- thing awry in our objective, our main aspiration. In other words, a parent who rightly deems that the duty of training up his child into a knowledge of truth is a duty about which exaggeration is hardly possible, is yet in danger of failing grievously i] THE PROBLEM STATED 29 unless he subordinates this aim to the higher and all-inclusive one of simply bringing the boy into communication with GOD, He is like the poor fellows who, because they pursue happiness for its own sake, are, among all the wanderers on the earth's surface, the least likely to reach their goal. Indeed the effect of the wrong perspective in education is sadly evident. It is to be seen in the barren and repellent strivings of the " educa- tionist " parent who thinks to achieve the mystery by a busy adoption of cheap rule, a harassing enforcement of various " maxims of ashes " : while the contrary is set off for us in a harmony between activity and silence, and is marked by a surprising forbearance and a refrain- ing from reproof and interference. This is the outcome of a certain largeness of aim. The little wayward mind has to be turned Godward : and the direction has to be taught it through common experience as a trend of living really natural to it, and, in the deepest sense, rewarding. The boy's journeying has to be guided on to a road in which every step that is a self-renunciation is also a joy ; and the earliest steps he takes in the light and assurance of his mother's smile. For a time no other beckoning is needed. But the day comes when he must pass out beyond the four 30 HOME TRAINING [i walls, and will discover, so we hope, that that smile was but a ray from the eternal Sun of Righteousness, which if he keeps in view he will find his true self. While this is in balance the most fatal temper in the parent is insincerity : the next, callousness: then fussiness and impatience; and into this latter all those are prone to fall who, without knowing it, rate harmlessness of conduct before the fear of GOD ; and before the living Wisdom of Whom it is said, " I am the mother of fair love and fear and knowledge and holy hope : I therefore being eternal am given to all my children which are named of Him.- They would hope to imbue their son with all the meaningless adult proprieties before he is twenty years old, and therewith, if they achieve it, to rest content. They forget that, as an equipment for life, conformity to rule is a minus quantity. It may denote nothing but a want of originality and high spirits. Yet during boyhood it is a solace to a parent with nerves on edge, and gives hope that the young man will be for many years an acceptable figure in social circles where life is dim; But if the boy has in him real individuality, vigour, and a striving after the highest, he is sure to be troublesome, more or i] THE PROBLEM STATED ji less recalcitrant, and often baffling : and at each collision of wills everything will depend on whether the father is trying to lead him into the knowledge of the Most High, or merely to drill him into a pattern of his own devising. For such is the alternative. Either we frame for ourselves a picture of what we hope our son to be and then if we are eager try to shape his character accordingly, or we give him the know- ledge of GOD and let it work in him, knowing that it will issue in something of eternal worth but different to anything that has been seen before. But while we acknowledge this outcome to be our great reward it must not be our one aim. We must hope to bring Godliness into the human soul not merely because we prefer vitality to sloth and originality to dullness, but because our own knowledge of GOD has taught us that the divine thing which we can impart is, in and for itself, enough. It must not be cramped by our own narrowness, or soiled with our paltry ambi- tions. In other words, we aim not at turning out a good man, but at glorifying the Most High. Those who feel obliged to enter on the sacred duties of parenthood without the assurance of religious truth which would enable them to subscribe to any such formula : who think of 32 HOME TRAINING [i impersonal goodness rather than of GOD, and doubt whether a special revelation was ever given to man, I would urge that they shoiold clear their minds as to the task before them. They have to think whether the impersonal idea is possible for the child's mind : and whether it is not eternally laid down that the idea of the earthly parent should lead to the conviction of our Father which is in Heaven, Whom it is given to us personally to know. If they persuade themselves that this is not for them to feel and firmly to hold, then let them deal sincerely. In the long run, the worst of all policies is to bring in Christianity in which we don't believe, in the hope of keeping the nursery quiet, or of making our sons outwardly like everybody else. But what alternative an agnostic parent is to adopt I confess I do not know. There appears to be no programme naturally fitted for the years when personality begins to assert itself, except the story, taught by a Society, of a personal Creator and Father, humanly revealed. Where the daily home-life presents this truth to the young they are fed by an inward happiness which lifts them on to virtue and love of their own kind and kills the workings of sin within them. When we have set ourselves patiently to i] THE PROBLEM STATED 33 understand the message we cannot wonder at its perfect congruity with the deepest needs of every child, nor fret any longer at the fact that there is no other secret of training fit to be set beside it. II : THE HALCYON DAYS TXT'E begin by fixing attention on some essential conditions of the problem of training a virtuous character. " The world," as a young child once remarked, " is full of things I may not do " : by which he meant that he was constantly being prompted by desires within him towards certain actions, and constantly being checked in the doing of them by those who were guiding his life and who were too powerful for him to resist. In the very early years this is probably a complete statement from the child's point of view. The checking is to him, not at first a matter of love, still less of wisdom, but of power. He has already, say by ten months old, found out that resistance to it is futile. Now without complicating the question at this stage with other obvious considerations, let us bear in mind that the child must and clearly does frame a rapid and far-reaching induction from the following facts : (i) Some desires he may try to gratify without any particular hindrance, but when he does, 34 ii] THE HALCYON DAYS 35 nothing happens, e.g. when he tries to seize the moon. (After a time, which varies in different cases, he gives up the attempt.) (2) Other desires he might gratify were it not for hindrances purposely put in his way by stronger people. These he judges to be within his powers of attainment, for occasionally, owing to the inattention of his elders, he surreptitiously secures his object. (3) Other desires he sometimes gratifies openly and with the approval of his elders, but not always — the question whether or no being decided, as far as he can tell, quite capriciously. (4) Yet another class he learns that he can and does gratify without let or hindrance, save that certain intervals between the occasions are insisted on. As regards training the will through control of the appetites, it might appear as if the above statement pretty well exhausted the facts. But as a rule they are supplemented very early by another, less concrete and vastly more important than any of the foregoing, viz. the child perceives that he is loved by his mother, and less obviously by his father, and perhaps by his nurse. This makes the whole difference. His life may be conceived of as moving on a plane which is for 36 HOME TRAINING [ii a time on a level with that of puppies, ducklings and other very young animals. That is to say, for a time there is nothing thought about by any living thing except the gratification of the senses. This is only limited by want of opportunity, and the two species so far are alike. But it may be doubted whether in the case of the normal human boy any such continence is ever shown as is habitually by nearly all other living animals, at least in a natural, not a domesticated, state ; * the difference between them being indicated very early in life. But we may suppose that if the parental aflfection ceased before a year from birth, the subsequent stage of the boy-child would be very similar to that of an animal, only with some faculties of intelligence more amply developed. A neglected gutter-snipe differs from a puppy chiefly because his desires are not * This sentence touches a very obscure and interesting ques- tion. Domesticated animals seem willing to over-eat ; certainly pug dogs and other pet dogs will, such as Aberdeens ; but a parrot in a cage, with nothing whatever to do but eat, and encompassed with opportunity, seems never to suffer from indigestion. On the whole, animals seem to be guided wholly by desire which they do not stimulate either by imagination or by choice cookery. A baby apparently stops feeding just as an animal does, when it has had enough ; but suppose a child of, say, three or five had access only to plain uncooked food, could he be trusted not to exceed ? I should doubt it : but the relation of the excess to the dawn of the higher faculties requires explanation. n] THE HALCYON DAYS 37 restricted to those of floundering and eating. He is more inquisitive ; can remember things ; can understand low gossip ; can be bemused by the cinema. But morally there is no difference whatever, because his life is quite devoid of law. Whatever love his mother showed him was in the pre- self-conscious age and probably taught him nothing but a few precautions for self- preservation which he would soon have learnt unaided. Hence he lives a life of inclination, tempered not by law but only by want of oppor- tunity. In the case of the child of good parents the dawning perception of the mother's love is the beginning of the influence of spirit on the life. Slowly he perceives that bound up with certain prohibitions is a wonderful thing which he some- how finds it easy to understand if he is not hurried, namely, love : and that by degrees there is a strange new thing called joy, which is prefer- able to the sensation of sucking lollipops, because it comes from a sense of having won the approval of the loving mother ; and, odd to say, it has nothing to do with any one of the five senses : indeed it is occasionally secured most directly by denying an appetite, for no reason except that the mother wishes him to do so. Thus experience lifts him up into a world of which 38 HOME TRAINING [ii the duckling, as far as we can judge, knows nothing. But even in this early stage the above descrip- tion is incomplete. Suppose he is a child who readily forgets what he is told, or who finds him- self possessed by an overmastering appetite for sweets, it is probable that on occasions he will run counter to the expressed will of the nurse or the mother, and become guilty of a trans- gression. Now the better the home the less likely is it that this occurrence should be passed over, or the special opportunity for deepening the child's view of life be misunderstood. What takes place ? Not only a manifestation of the parent's displeasure, but a punishment. The theory of punishment is a most controversial and perplexed subject ; and it will suffice here if I point out one or two plain effects of its adminis- tration. We are thinking of a child about two years old. He discovers and stamps upon a hedge- sparrow chick sprawling helpless on the lawn, after being ejected by a young cuckoo from the nest. This is contrary to the mother's injunc- tion, well understood, as to kindness to all helpless and innocent animals. Jack's practice has for some time been to take to his crib as a night ii] THE HALCYON DAYS 39 companion a small earthenware guinea-pig. After careful thought and some delay he is sentenced for one or two nights to sleep in solitude. What takes place in his mind ? What is the intention of the punishment, which may fairly be reckoned as very lenient ? At first it might appear as if the whole effect would be as follows : The lawgiver imposes a law ; the subject violates it and suffers poena damni^ and, finding that this is the case, resolves not to commit this particular transgression again,- or if he does, to take care that he is not found out. Everybody would agree that so far very little good indeed has been done. But in a very large number of cases something further is achieved. The child learns not only that dis- obedience brings a carnal loss, but that in the region of his affections he suffers from a far more serious thing, namely, the disturbance of his relation to his mother : the threat of some- thing like estrangement ; the looming horror of a lonely life. From this feeling arises a certain disposition with regard not only to acts of aggression against fledglings, but to all acts of disobedience whatever. Instead of the incident being merely a coarse deterrent from a particular line of action which in a year or two would cease 40 HOME TRAINING [ii to attract, it becomes fruitful in the spiritual side of life, because it deepens in the child the sense of the value of love, by his feeling the possi- bility of its loss ; and it unites in his mind the two grand conceptions which at first he is prone to sever, love and law. Further, it may be noted that in a changed disposition towards living creatures he discovers a happiness which was unguessed at before the murder of the chick. This enables him to see that in his mother there is not only fower to interfere vdth his propen- sities, and love which concerns itself closely with his doings, but wisdom too, in that by following her mandates he is a happier child than before. The triviality of this illustration may easily blind us to the importance of understanding it thoroughly. When a long-suffering schoolmaster or one of those patient people who are prepared to take charge of " difficult cases " at the end of a curtailed school career, stands baffled and dis- mayed before the problem in its teens, it is simply and solely because through childhood certain impressions about the meaning of life ought to have been made deep and lasting, but they have not been made at all ; and from fourteen years onward the boy has been striving to act on the false opinion with which he started, namely, ii] THE HALCYON DAYS 41 that the way of inclination and desire is the way to happiness. Between his second and his four- teenth birthday a good many things have hap- pened which to an enlightened inquirer would have undermined confidence in this view. But a small boy is not enlightened, nor is he an inquirer ; and even if he were, there is still a good deal to be said for the theory he has adopted, especially as towards the end of this period new desires make themselves felt with a new prospect of gratification ; and though some untoward upsets of his arrangements have marked his recent history, he sees no reason to conclude that he is on the wrong tack altogether. He anticipates greater liberty in the future, and it seems to him opportune that just when the increase of liberty is due his desires are multiplied ; and if he has been fairly successful in the past in circumventing a nurse, a governess and two parents, what is there to prevent him from scoring a similar but more decisive victory in the struggle against a tutor ? It will be noticed that I am choosing the years fourteen to eighteen not so much as a time of critical struggle as one when the struggle is vir- tually over. This is true in the majority of cases. No mistake is so frequently made as to conceive 42 HOME TRAINING [ii of the later teens as ordinarily the most impression- able time of life. Much might be said for their being the very reverse. Of course, if there has been, as there sometimes is, an even balance preserved in childhood between control and neglect, so that the young boy has been unable to form a definite conclusion as to which of the two is best, law or lawlessness, he reaches his teens — by which I mean puberty — ^in a wobbling frame of mind, waywardness alternating with indecisive efforts at sobriety ; and if at this junc- ture some powerful influence supervenes such as the tonic of sound public opinion in a good boarding-house or the bracing personality of a tutor, then something is done to mend the woeful gaps of his early training. But it is likely to be a patchwork, and indeed one of a very common pattern. This point, however, will come up later. We have not yet exhausted the lessons to be drawn from the tragedy of the hedge- sparrow. It is important to note that the good results so far traced all refer to the child's relation to his parent. It is his mother's law which he transgressed and the whole heinousness of his action is really due to that fact. The world would not be much the poorer for the dispatch ii] THE HALCYON DAYS 43 of an unfledged chick which in any case was doomed ; nor is it at all certain that the act denoted a ruthless temper. In itself it was trivial ; but occurring when it did, at the start of life, it was a momentous occasion, fraught with grave results, especially if it is to be regarded as typical of other conflicts of will between child and parent. The effect is good if the opportunity is rightly seized, not chiefly because the child is deterred from a wrong path of conduct, but because his belief in his parent is greatly strengthened. This is the really interesting point, and it requires examination. The ordinary or popular account of this matter would at once admit the importance of a child's belief in his parent, by insisting on such belief as the only safeguard against undesirable forms of activity. " Of course a child must trust his parent and learn to obey him, or he will grow up to be a nuisance to everybody about him till at last you have to send him to school to get him out of the way. For my part," says Paterfamilias, " I don't mind that way out of it, but somehow it doesn't seem quite right, and anyhow the boy's mother is a good deal worried about it all." As in all popular views which are apparently those of common sense, there is nothing in this 44 HOME TRAINING [ii statement which need be flatly contradicted. The dicta are true as far as they go ; but they proceed from the belief that the one thing neces- sary in training is to secure outward actions of the right kind, and " right " is frequently taken (in spite of Vice Versa and Mr. Pope *) to mean merely that which does not interfere with the even tenor of the paternal life. But we have to remember that character is not a list of activities but a profound and inexhaustible mystery — one of the invisible things which loses its meaning, its interest, and its greatness as soon as we conceive of it as visible and outward. I cannot think of any definition of it which would not be ludicrously inadequate to the subject ; but we may at any rate see that the saying " By their fruits ye shall know them," if applied to our child, does not mean " You will know if he has been rightly trained according as he does or does not wash his face, control his voice, and say good morning,'' but rather, " The right training will be known by the development of a personality which can be both loved and respected." How does this bear upon our discussion ? Simply in this way. Personality is evidently bound up closely with the person's deep feeling * The father in " Marriage," by H. G. Wells. ii] THE HALCYON DAYS 45 of what life means : what is its aim ? what its hope ? We need not trouble about which of the two forms the other, the theory of life or the personality : suffice it that the former is an unspeakably important factor in the development of the latter. We have then to ask what effect on the child's view of life may be traced to the fact that he has learnt to believe in his parent's love, wisdom, and power. In other words, would it have mattered much if the murder of the chick had not been noticed, or if it had been noticed in the wrong way, or if it had not been followed by a temporary loss ? If it had not been noticed at all, then of course an opportunity of enriching the child's view of life would have been lost : but more than that, the propensity to be active at the expense of other living things would have been strengthened by exercise not followed by correction. And it would have been the result, not of deliberate neglect, but merely of a lapse in vigilance on the part of the mother or nurse. (Merely not watch- ing is the cause of a huge amount of bad training, even on the part of the most assiduous pastors.) This tendency to be active at the expense of others is selfishness, and we accordingly reach this result, that instead of a|deepened belief in 46 HOME TRAINING [ii the mother's love, wisdom and power, the child at the end of the day on which the murder took place would be more inclined to be selfish and inconsiderate than he was before. It must be admitted that this is no small result ; and it is easy to see what must come about in a few years, supposing the lack of vigilance is a normal or very frequent state of things — ^if, that is, this occurrence is typical. But there is another way in which the oppor- tunity might have been not ignored so much as misused. Suppose nothing had ever been taught to the child either by precept or example about kindness to animals or weaklings generally. This would be a very probable omission, and the difference is that after the tragedy the mother would have been confronted by two courses of action, both unsatisfactory. She might yield to her impulse of anger at having her feelings dis- turbed, as the mother in the slums, who snatches her baby from under the wheels of a passing dray and slaps it without reflecting whether the little thing could possibly have known that a dray- wheel is heavy, hard, and progressive ; or she might suspect injustice in this policy and confine herself to an admonition based on the occurrence. The slum-mother's method needs no discussion. ii] THE HALCYON DAYS 47 If it succeeds as a deterrent, it only deters from one particular offence ; that is to say, the formula which we may imagine the father to use (possibly a cat's-meat man, as Dickens would say), inter- vening in his own person, " I'll teach you, you idiot," expresses exactly what does not happen. The child is not taught anything, but is merely forced into the belief that his relation to his parent is marked by unpleasantness. This is the worst possible issue of the affair, but it must be very frequent. It belongs to a state of things where instead of there being too much talk about duty, as often is the case among people with a larger command of words, there has been too little. That is, the law of kindness to the weak has either not been mentioned at all or so hurriedly that it has not been taken into the mind, and remains a dead letter. The alternative of admonishing for the first time ex post facto is unsatisfactory because of what it misses. It misses the rich opportunity of using experience and trusts to words which, as we all know, are often useless. From the foregoing remarks it might be inferred that a misuse or ignoring of such an opportunity as is presented by a wilful transgression is serious because it misses something good. But how good 48 HOME TRAINING [ii the thing is which is missed has not yet been made plain. I will try to explain this point first with reference to the object of our immediate quest, viz. the secret of the training of the will. What has been missed, then, is the opportunity for enriching the child's idea of his relation to his parent. That is exactly where the gain would be if the opportunity were rightly seized. Secondary advantages of one kind and another have been hinted at, but this which concerns the relation to the parent requires attention. If things have gone right, the child begins to perceive that his mother's injunctions are to be obeyed, not only because unpleasantness supervenes if they are not — this he hardly thinks about — but because there is a positive gain of a spiritual kind. Her pleasure is manifested at his obedience and he learns to find a lofty satisfaction in her pleasure simply because he begins to return her love. The least hint of displeasure from that quarter is more than he is prepared to face. And then her wisdom ! Before many weeks are out he has begun to substitute for his unreasoning enmity against small feathered things a keen and sympathetic interest in them, so that it becomes to him a really regrettable fact that he ever put his foot on that blind and sprawling fowl. Of ii] THE HALCYON DAYS 49 course he recognizes that he knew no better ; but his mother did : all the time, and long before indeed, she was possessed of the wisdom which taught her a thing he could never have learnt without her — the mystery that there is something better than stamping on hedge-sparrows, and that is tending them. Who would have thought it possible ? He has reached that truth, and with- out her it would have been impossible. Who knows how many other wonderful things there may be in store for him if he does what she tells him ? The child, in short, is now aware of a powerful and abiding stimulus towards denying his inclina- tions, not only in one matter but in all wherein his parents' will is plainly shown him. He be- comes willing also to make efforts for the achieve- ment of some childish object, whereas if his mother either did not show interest or (worse) gave him his desire v^thout the effort, the stimulus disappears. It is vividly present to his mind when these conditions are fulfilled : (i) That he believes in his mother, from previous experience ; (2) That she, knowing the secret of happiness, would not call on him for an effort without reason ; and 50 HOME TRAINING [ii (3) That the reason will become plain when the thing is done, in the gratification which she evidently feels. Think of this possibility when the child, still two years old, we will suppose wants to clamber up the seat of a railway-carriage from the floor : it is just within his powers to do so unaided (I am not sure if this would be the case, but that need not matter), so he appeals to his mother to be lifted up. That is what she ought not to do, but unfortunately mothers often err in this respect. It would be far better if she utterly ignored the child and left him to make the attempt. Perhaps the best thing would be not to ignore him but to encourage him while carefully refraining from helping him. Thus he would learn not only something about climbing, and the relation between mind and matter, but a deepened trust in his mother's judgment. In relation to the strengthening of the will, he is discovering the priceless fact that difficulties are meant not to be shirked or groaned over, but to be surmounted. More might be said about the gain to the child from the use made by the mother of her oppor- tunities ; but some of these are less likely to be ignored because the importance of them when set down on paper seems too obvious to need II] THE HALCYON DAYS 51 mention. For instance, in early years much might be done not only for bracing the will, but for implanting thoughtfulness for others, by inducing the child voluntarily to forgo some treat for the sake of relieving some local patent case of suffering. There must be scores of ways of doing this : scores of cases of suffering not very far away ; and the age at which some such appeal could be made would vary with different children. I cannot imagine what excuse there is for the very common practice of keeping all the sad facts of life from the knowledge of a growing child. One of the great difficulties about home life is the vacuity of mind into which young people very easily fall. But the bright fact about all tragedies is that they furnish food for thought and stimulus to wholesome action. Meanwhile, owing to some crazy idea that the happiness of childhood will be impaired by an op- portunity of helping others — the very thing which enriches it — parents often allow their offspring to believe that life is not only meant to be a perpetual holiday but in fact is one, not only for themselves but for all other people. This is heinous folly, and yet — such is life — any protest against it is sure to be misunderstood. If I say that boys when quite young ought to be gradually intro- 52 HOME TRAINING [ii duced to the fact of suffering, that their sym- pathies may be quickened and their experience of the joy of service begun, I shall be told doubt- less that children ought to be happy and their sweet young lives not overcast with the shadows of maturity, and so forth. Of course, such talk is deplorable nonsense, because everything depends on the degree, and the gradual fitting of the teaching to the mind that is only gradually able to receive. And let it be noted that, as far as possible, sympathy should only be evoked with a view to some practical action, even if it be only a word of condolence. Nobody wants mawMshness or insincerity, but we all want in young people some measure of understanding in regard to the sombre facts of life and its rich appeal from all sides to young and old alike for succour and fellow-feeling. At present it very often happens that young men and maidens are grossly, barbarously callous about the suffering of others because they have not a notion what it means,* nor how it has anything to do with themselves. Similarly people often grieve, or * The following instance of a nurse's discernment has been told before, but is well worth repeating. She observed that Tommy, aged two, was given to biting his small sister, aged one, on the arm when he found her unattended and assailable. Instead of scolding him the nurse bit him on his arm, and in a moment a ii] THE HALCYON DAYS S3 ought to, over the way in which young men miss rich occasions of giving pleasure to old people, to the deaf or the disabled. But how can they be blamed as if the fault were altogether theirs ? They have had no introduction to the subject or to any part of it except through some abortive exhortations from the school pulpit. Whenever anything happens which calls for succour from somebody in the home — ^whether it be the gar- dener's son is ill, or the poodle's leg is out of joint — young boys ought to know of these things and be called upon to bear part of the burden accord- ing to the measure of their powers. If not, the belief which they are very ready to form is confirmed, viz. that life is meant for them to be untroubled. And if they once think this, when and how are they to unlearn it ? But I am digressing. Our subject is not the awakening of the sympathies but the strengthen- ing of the will. Yet before we leave the former, let us note that in respect of the narrower inquiry before us, the quickening of sympathies plays an important part. If it takes the form great lesson was learnt. The offence was not repeated. Cf. Calverley's words put into the mouth o£ a cat : " They call me cruel. Do I know if mice or song-bird feels ? I only know they make me light and salutary meals." 54 HOME TRAINING [n of finding joy in service, it acts as a perpetual taming of desires which are snubbed as they get in the way of the nobler quest. A taste for art may or may not operate in this saving fashion ; but unselfish interest in others cuts at the root of all faults which are the outcome of egoism. We must return to the conditions of right use of opportunity at such an age as two years. One very obvious is that the parent should as often as possible be on the spot. If the best of all the results of an act of disobedience being dealt with wisely, justly, lovingly be the deepening and strengthening of the relation between parent and child — and there must be no doubt whatever on this point — ^it is clear that a serious disturbance in the training takes place if the conduct of the matter is left to the nurse. If the nurse is incompetent there is no saying what mischief she will do. If she is a woman of character, of firm- ness, decision and insight, there is urgent danger of her usurping the parental authority and muddling the child's earliest and deepest ideas of order and discipline. Things often are not what they seem to be ; and I am strongly inclined to think that a weak-willed nurse who perpetually refers nursery problems to the mother — even if ii] THE HALCYON DAYS 55 the latter be no genius at all — ^is in the long run a more beneficent agent than the wise and strong person who, like the governess, perhaps, later on, becomes to the child the main embodiment of law, order, and love. At this stage the relation to the parent is everything. If it is blurred and disordered, the temporary peace and tranquillity in the nursery or the schoolroom are purchased at a heavy cost, the payment of which cannot be for ever deferred. The principle which is here at stake must remain for treatment in a subsequent chapter. Another condition is that the little incident — seemingly so trifling but pregnant with lasting issues — should result in a curbing of desires because a higher end is in sight. Many of us go all awry in respect of this prin- ciple. We fancy that mere deprivation of luxuries encourages self-control. By itself it does nothing of the kind. I see no evidence that the poor are more self-controlled than the rich, or that their bodily desires are less rampant. The splendid instances of self-mastery, of faith in a high ideal, of a straight, clean, simple view of life's problems, such as are found in all classes of the community, are the outcome not of the weakening of passion, not of absence of opportunity for indulgence, but 56 HOME TRAINING [ii of patient, unceasing presentation of an opposite principle of living, beginning in the earliest years. Nature prompts always to self-indulgence ; if not to the coarser, then to the more refined forms of egoism. But the parental control starting from the " transcendent dower " of love, power and wisdom can make the little child feel that there is something in life above and better in every way than any gratification ; and while he pursues this, interpreted as it is to him at every stage by the parent, he forms a conviction as to the goal of life and also as to the road in which he is set to travel, which nothing after- wards can altogether upset — though, as we shall see, it is to be exposed to a real on- slaught later on, and if the home training is incomplete in one grand particular, the fair issue of the present may easily be turned into a sad travesty of all that is really noble, enduring, and complete. There is one delusion against which a stern protest must be made. Suppose passions, desires, appetites, and the like could be weakened by stinting the diet (which is hardly possible), the result would be a lapse from the ideal. Boys of strong desires are the best ; and the way to train them is not to weaken their desires but to reinforce ii] THE HALCYON DAYS 57 the spiritual side of life, which in childhood means the relation to the parents, so effectually that his motive for curbing the desires shall be even stronger than the desires themselves. Then there is some chance of his growing up a complete man. Nothing is to be hoped for from any sort of emasculation, but solely from a full spiritual equipment. Here again misunderstanding is almost certain. I shall be taxed v^th advising a luxurious food diet for boys, though I have often inveighed against it on the ground of its tendency to inflame the passions after childhood. The truth is, a rich or over-abundant diet for boys is more deplorable as a symptom of general self-indulgence than as a stimulus to concupiscence. There is some doubt about the latter, none about the former. In both respects its mischievous working is in the mental region first, and there it is far more potent than merely in its effect on the bodily tissues, whatever that effect may be. It is there- fore vastly more important that the spiritual effect be understood than that controversy be started as to the physical effects of food, about which Science at present speaks with no very certain tone. If, then, abnormalities be put on one side, our aim should be to dominate the S8 HOME TRAINING [ii desire, however strong it be, by the power of a mighty motive which is the simple outcome of the filial relation and of no other. As to the main aim of the training of childhood, the above statement may suffice. Ill : THE PLACE OF STIMULUS IT will be noticed that in the above analysis a prominent place is given to stimulus, and the subject here touches on a very interesting controversy, which among schoolmasters and other teachers, though sometimes dormant, has never been quite laid to rest. But though specifically it is a schoolmasters' question, any parent who tries to act upon a rational principle in his endeavours to train a child's v^U, must, whether consciously or not, make up his mind on one side or the other. Therefore I will try to explain it for clearness' sake from the point of view of a school teacher. Its connexions with the problems of home-training will be brought out more plainly, I hope, in that way than in any other. There appears to be a gulf fixed between two theories, and that no trainer of the will, be he parent or teacher, can act on more than one of the two, anyhow on any given occasion. The two theories are as follows : it will be well to define them rather sharply so as to show whether they are irreconcilable or not. 59 6o HOME TRAINING [in The one may be called the old-fashioned disciplinary view. A votary of it would express himself somewhat as follows : " You must never forget that whatever be the difficulties or the ambiguities about intellectual and moral training, a child will ultimately have to face a world where a great many disagreeable things must be done and ought to be done thoroughly. Therefore his training if it is to fit him for his after-life ought to provide for this by furnishing him with plenty of tasks connected both with conduct and what we call work, the benefits of which depend not on the task being interesting but on its being unpleasant. A well-brought-up child will go through drudgery in work, and in conduct subdue his inclinations not in the least because he likes either one or the other, but simply because it is his duty. " Now when you people who are always talking about interest and stimulus point to the sur- prisingly rapid and perhaps brilliant results of the modern system of psychological adaptation, of assimilating work to play, of letting a child educate himself and so forth, you forget that you are trying to train his will by letting him pass days of which morning, noon and evening are to him days of pleasantness : you set his footsteps on Ill] THE PLACE OF STIMULUS 6i the " path of primrose dalliance " and call it the narrow way, or work : whereas it is the broad way, subtly misinterpreted and fatally made like to the other under all sorts of specious phrases : but leading none the less to the destruction of all virility and grit of character. It is as bad in its own sphere as the mistake made in the training of our young soldiers for war, in the matter of rifle shooting. We give them for practice a task which in reality is made ludicrously unlike the real thing. Both in practice and in warfare the soldier has to hit an object with his bullets, but in practice he enjoys all sorts of aids which make it far easier for him to hit the mark than it ever can be in a battle. And then people are dis- appointed, when it comes to real fighting, at the waste of cartridges. The truth is, there is no short cut to learning. Whether a boy be quick or slow, unless there is a good deal of the patient plodder about him he will never come to his full stature. He will have learnt the deadly creed that progress is possible without effort, which is the most insidious lie that ever lodged in the human mind." If the disputant be, as he generally is, a school- master, he will probably not have time to frame anything like so long a contention as this, but 62 HOME TRAINING [iii will clinch the matter hy looking you straight in the face and saying, "It's my business to make the boys work : and the more they dislike it the better for them. All this stimulus business is bosh.'' Readers interested in educational theory will recognize in the above indictment the assault which has been made on the " Montessori system " of training young children of the elementary school class. Briefly the system is based on the principle of self-education which was powerfully advocated by Pestalozzi and Froebel, and something of which is to be found in the theories of nearly all educational reformers. We Public School masters to-day, if awkwardly " cornered " by demonstration of success, gener- ally reply: '^ Oh yes ; it may do fairly well for children, but the difficulty is the training of schoolboys of sixteen. Any such system trans- ferred to a Public School would be a dreadful fiasco." With these words we demittimus auricu- las^ and plod along our jog-trot road, absolved, so we think, from the appalling task of deciding between two principles. Meantime the advocates of all the numerous systems and theories which are built up on the basis of " self-education," " self-expression," and Ill] THE PLACE OF STIMULUS 63 kindred ideas have a good deal to say. If they are wise they refrain from destructive criticism. If they are not, they harp upon the undeniable fact that the votaries of the " discipline " school are encompassed by failure : that at the end of the school course a huge number of children are found to have assimilated nothing : and if some- thing of the sort is urged against the Public School system, the criticism provokes so much choler as to suggest that there must be something in it. But there is nothing very helpful in quarrelling over our failures. It is more to the purpose to think wherein the self-educational theories are strong. The greatest argument in their favour is that they follow Nature. We have seen that a child up to six years learns rapidly and victoriously when he is not being taught at all, and indeed it is obvious that many school dunces who turn out efficient men in later life have been imbibing notions in their play hours as readily as the prize-winners at their side. Hence it is inferred that the play hours process should be adopted in the schoolroom, and the Montessori system is an attempt in this direction. That is why choice is allowed to the children to a far greater degree than in ordinary schools ; in play hours and in ordinary life a young child 64 HOME TRAINING [iii selects with unerring instinct the objects and concrete facts which for him constitute the best material for fruitful experience. When a teacher comes blundering in with a prescribed programme it is many hundreds to one that it is ill-adapted to any given child : and coercive methods of con- straining him to attend to the programme are signs of failure, and not only abortive but rather cruel. And so on. Much of this discussion, it is to be remarked, concerns the effectiveness of certain ways of training the intellect. Much more might be said on this subject. But we are in quest of principles underlying the training of the Avill, and to that we must give attention, trying to answer the question whether there is not some way of reconciling the two rival theories. The question may be better put as follows : Does the natural system bar the disciplinary ? And again : "Is discipline a natural or unnatural process of training ? '' The answer shows pretty plainly that as usual the controversialists are wrangling over super- ficialities and have not taken the trouble to get at each other's meaning. It will be found that when either of the two systems has been successful^ it has borrowed largely from the other. In other Ill] THE PLACE OF STIMULUS 65 words, instead of snapping at each other as partizans we ought to learn co-operation. The most illuminating book bearing on the subject is Hinton's " Mystery of Pain." Some readers will remember how the gifted thinker led people to understand that in all the highest, truest joy there is an element of suffering which not only is an essential condition of the joy, but in a healthy nature must be absorbed into the joy. Effort which to a sick man appears wholly painful is to a strong man an essential condition of the joy of exercise. This truth holds good for mental exercise. The more a boy surmounts difficulties in his work the more he enjoys stretch- ing his brain in attacking other difficulties and problems. There is no want of effort, but, ideally, all the eifort is made in hope of achieve- ment, and schoolmasters are often guilty of dis- puting together without first making it clear whether they believe in dogged eifort without such hope. That is where the question lies. Arguments from Nature are certainly against any such belief: else a mountain climber might be contented to save his ticket to Switzerland and mount a treadmill. If all hope of reaching the summit were lost would anyone go on climbing ? If not, why do we try to force boys to work at a £ 66 HOME TRAINING [iii subject which to them is as a treadmill because it is dissociated from all idea of progress ? If, on the other hand, we insist on the stimulus of pro- gress, is there not a danger of the boys relying on the kind of encouragement which in adult life they cannot expect to enjoy ? No, not if the problems set them are hard enough. There must be a stimulus somewhere : either in the hope of achievement or in some strong personal influence which induces a boy to believe that there is some profit to be got by plodding, though he is far from hopeful of ever discovering it. The Montessori system — if we may believe report — provides both the personal influence and the sense of progress, and no wonder the results are surprising. Finally it may be remarked that when, as often happens, we set boys to tasks which we know and they know they cannot do, the masters, who say they believe in unalloyed drudgery as a discipline, themselves apply all kinds of stimulus, sometimes unconsciously. So much for intellectual work. The question now arises whether the same principle holds good in moral effort. The remainder of this book, it is hoped, will supply the answer. We have to determine whether resistance to inclination can be expected from a human being as a lasting habit Ill] THE PLACE OF STIMULUS (>^ unless it is begun in childhood, and in the power of some motive which supplies the needed stimulus through life. There are two schools which face the problem differently : the one by shielding the child as far as possible from all trials hopes to secure for him happiness and immunity from lapse. This course normally ends by spoiling him. The other believes in effort and the sur- mounting of difficulties unaided. They often forget, however, to plant the lasting and indis- pensable motive, and expect the conquest of self to be achieved without the knowledge of GOD. IV : CHRIST AND THE CHILD MIND /^UR Lord's recorded utterances about ^^ children are among the greatest guiding sayings in the history of mankind. They are so supremely attractive and winning that some men, unable to rise to any clear perception of the claims of His personality upon our belief, have pinned their faith to Him as a Teacher on the strength of these words alone. But if they appeal with strange force to our deepest instincts it clearly behoves us to understand their drift. They involve large principles, as is evident to anyone who reflects on what a little child essen- tially is. It is certain that all the beautiful and most childlike qualities of the human child postulate the filial relation and a home. It is a mistake to make much of any quality which might at first sight seem to be independent of this relation : such as innocence, fair beyond words though this quality is. For innocence, without the protec- tion afforded by the mother, is too fleeting a 68 iv] CHRIST AND THE CHILD MIND 69 quality to be worth talking about. If a gutter- snipe of six years is innocent he must be quite abnormal. But under the shelter of a home and a parent's care the beauty of innocence is plainly to be marked for many years later. Innocence, however, cannot have been in the Lord's mind when He bade His followers to become as little children, because it is a quality far too much bound up with ignorance to be conceivable in an adult. It may be supposed that incalculable loss has been the outcome of a shallow, indolent view of such words as these, " Except ye become as little children ye shall not enter the Kingdom of Heaven." Because innocence seems to be the prominent quality of children, adult listeners to the Bible in Church, if they think about the words at all, imagine they are being exhorted to put away their wrongdoings and become blameless members of society, and it is not a matter for wonder that the words, though they charm for the moment, run idly off their minds. Perhaps some of their attractiveness is due to their seeming to call for no effort except one which Nature tells us is impossible. As addressed to adults the saying must, of course, refer to the one essential quaHty of the typical child : that is his trust in his parent — 70 HOME TRAINING [iv the sense of dependence, and joyful acquiescence in it. Suppose this quality absent, the child becomes dehumanized and unnatural, no longer childlike, as we say. In place of the glad and frequent appeal to the mother to come and watch the tiny efforts to do something, sometimes we find reserve, taciturnity almost indicating mistrust. All that is winsome and truly natural to childhood disappears. The characteristic which Christ commended to His disciples was not innocence but trust : the difference being that the former is not meant to last through life, while the latter is to grow not only with a man's growth, but also with his decay. Now trust and dependence and all the charac- teristics of childhood which may be classified with them postulate a home and parents. If for a time other relations or guardians can manage to preserve such a quality in the child it is only because a simulated parent is better than none at all, but it is not the divinely ordained thing and need not be considered as affecting the broad statement. This being so, it is not too much to say that Christ in these words teaches the overwhelming importance not only of home life, but of monogamy which it requires : herein giving His imprimatur to what has justly been IV] CHRIST AND THE CHILD MIND 71 called the crowning achievement of civilization. But we are not now concerned with the teaching as addressed to adults, but with the main fact of the child-nature to which it calls attention : that is, a perfect readiness for the Jllial relation ; not the relation to other adults or to other children, important and interesting though that may be. As soon, then, as we picture the small human being in relation to his parent, another charac- teristic of the normal child comes into view, that is, his faculty of learning by experience. When things are as they should be, the mother is the one teacher for the first few years, the only exception being the father. But it is just during those years, say, up to six, that the growth in knowledge is most rapid and the gains most permanent. Much of what I have to say through- out this discussion presupposes the great lesson of science about human life, viz. that the impres- sions received in the nursery are the strongest and most durable of any. Experience could be appealed to, and there is plenty of it to hand to support the scientific view ; but it would be superfluous, as the proposition is not, as far as I know, seriously disputed, and all analogy from the world of fauna and flora goes to corroborate it. 72 HOME TRAINING [iv It is worth while, therefore, to remark that during the first six years the qualities that are to be noted are those which our Lord wished us to think about when He commended the child nature as our pattern if we are to be recipients of the Kingdom ; and among the essential qualities we must reckon that of eagerness to learn, and a power, which in most cases dwindles very soon, of learning quickly and retaining through life. Hence we gather that a " little child " is a very young human being, gifted for a short time with a remarkable power of mental growth which itself to a large extent depends on the proper exercise of trust in the parent's love, vdsdom, and power. Next, we find that as to growth, there is between the mental and the physical a correspondence indeed but always a difference too, and our interest in the subject springs from our perception of both. It is the blending of the two which arrests attention and enthrals our imagination, because while the differences manifest the working of the inexhaustible mystery of life, the corre- spondence indicates a subjection to a higher Power. If life were working, so to speak, untram- melled, we should expect to find its manifestations were not only infinitely various but utterly incal- iv] CHRIST AND THE CHILD MIND 73 culable and random, and so divergent from each other that there would be nothing to be gained from any comparison between them or any sort of juxtaposition of them in our thought. But as it is, the differences between living things are so supremely interesting, partly because they reveal the unending variety of life, but quite as much because they seem to be only allowed within something like a definite boundary-line. They are not wholly incalculable, but yet always fresh and somehow original, not mechanical or in the least rigid, fixed, certain. Both elements con- tribute to our unfailing interest — unfailing, that is, in normal cases. Occasionally one comes across an unpleasing phenomenon : a parent who finds his little boy's company dull " because he has no topics " ! That is to say, the wrong- headed father desiderates a faculty in the child which if developed would give dismal evidence of the premature death of child-likeness, and that too in his own offspring. He is, in short, the sort of man who is blind to the workings of a glorious thing, a new life, fresh, quick and spon- taneous, and grumbles covertly because, rather than observe it and refresh his own arid soul by communion with it, he is tjie victim of a crass and diseased wish to talk about society scandals or 74 HOME TRAINING [iv Tariff Reform. But simple human nature feels no such want. A child ought to be interesting first to the parent because he is a reproduction of the parent's personality with differences that cannot be foreseen ; then to anyone who knows the parents well, so that he can judge of the originality of the new human being ; then again to anyone who can see, though less clearly, the working of the satisfying contradiction, spon- taneity and law. Spontaneity and law : self-impulsion within limits. At first one is inclined to believe that the interest of a new life appearing to us is due to its unlikeness to others, that is to its originality. But it is not so. The limits set to the originality are just as essential to the winsome lovableness of the young child. Suppose the contrary, that there was no foretelling to the very slightest degree what wild variation from the normal type might be in store for the parents when a child was coming into the world, the first result would be that no one would be bold enough to face parenthood. As it is, each father trusts that his son will be born with a smaller measure of his own weaknesses and an ampler endowment of his virtues ; but if he must, as it seems, bring faults with him into life, the father secretly hopes iv] CHRIST AND THE CHILD MIND 75 they will be his own and not another's — so powerful is the wish for a reproduction of the life of the stock. Thus in His injunction about children our Lord bids us notice carefully what are the essen- tial characteristics of a child, those without which he would not be a child at all ; and we find them to be originality within certain limits, the limits being his inheritance from his parents, his readi- ness to learn, his power of trust ; and these not only help to constitute a child-nature, but they are necessary to the child being lovable. But the important point to notice at present is that all these qualities, though in a different measure, are bound up with the fact of parenthood, and in practical life presuppose a home. Hence we notice in passing that Christ in these words tells us that if we lose the home out of our national life we lose the truest pattern of character- development. But let us notice also — because we shall need the fact later — that one of the characteristics which seems to have least to do with the filial relation, the power of learning, is bound up with the most childlike, filial quality of all, viz trust. Where trust is undermined the peculiar activity of the learning power is at once checked, because 76 HOME TRAINING [iv single-mindedness and concentratioiij both neces- sary to true learning, are partly spoilt. This is obvious. It is true also that the growth in trust means a growth in power to learn. Other characteristics of children are worth mentioning, not only because we adults are charged to keep them all in mind, but because they enter into the question of the training of character and will-power. Imaginativeness is certainly one. Anyone who has never listened to children weaving pictures of fairyland, and seen them acting the whole scene with the utmost gusto, is greatly to be pitied. He may go on to the end of his impoverished life never realizing that in the mind of every healthy child there is a deep affinity for mystery, a native thirst for things which no one can explain and which are only what we call half true. Moreover, a universal trait is the steady refusal to look into the question whether the belief in fairies, goblins, Father Christmas, and Santa Claus is well or ill grounded. Doubtless a superior person of more than twelve years old looks upon this as a defect in the child's mind ; but fortunately there are very few superior enough to try to remove it. It need not concern us to ask whether it be a defect or not ; the important thing to remember IV] CHRIST AND THE CHILD MIND 77 is that Jesus Christ said " of such is the Kingdom of Heaven " ; and " such " includes the qualities w^hich are most essentially childlike, and among them this naive acceptance of the hints and suggestions from his environment, together with total lack of interest in the question of evidence, must be reckoned. If it survives, as it sometimes does, to years of " discretion," it takes the form of gullibility, which we are told by a learned man was a characteristic of the Christians in the second century a.d. Another, of the utmost importance, is the readiness of the child to accept one of the doctrines either that life is a time of privation and hardship or one of pleasure and indulgence, or compounded of both. This readiness is surprising when one reflects that to act on the first doctrine is unpleasant ; to accept the second is speedily disastrous ; and the third is generally quite illogical. But it is one of the immense facts, connected with the progress or deterioration of the race as no other fact is, that nearly every child, if his parents are united in their desire to im- print any one of these doctrines firmly on his mind, imbibes it so deeply into his being that it is for the most part proof against the assault and battery of all sorts of counteracting influences in later life. 78 HOME TRAINING [iv Is this really so ? Undoubtedly. The proofs are very numerous and are to be found on every hand. " Spoilt " children are still common enough to corroborate what I have said about the second of the three theories. I suppose we have all known men, and perhaps some women too, who are quite firm about one thing only, viz. in their refusal to face anything whatever that strikes them as unpleasant, no matter what the stimulus may be. In a carriage accident, their nearest and dearest may be entangled in the wreck and the horse kicking, but when some one suggests to one of these that he should sit on the animal's head he replies quietly that nothing could induce him to do it. If he gets a fly into his eye, not all the womenkind in the house, each armed with a separate emollient, can persuade him to sit still while it is extracted. Loss of eyesight in a year's time would be annoy- ing, but to prevent it by a moment's fortitude now is to him quite inconceivable. And so on. But all this softness is derived straight from the nursery. These people cannot face discomfort because they have never experienced the joy of doing so in response to a worthy stimulus. Thus when the chance is presented to them they only know that to take it would be immediately iv] CHRIST AND THE CHILD MIND 79 painful ; they are ignorant of the subsequent reward. As to a child's acceptance of the hard theory of life, I would remind my readers that up to about 182O5 comfort — as we understand the word — was almost unknown in English life. Many of us have been staggered by the records of dirt, under- feeding, and neglect in which schoolboys were dragged up to manhood one hundred years ago. But the surprise is increased, though the pity is lessened, when we learn that the homes were very nearly as rough as the school ; and in one respect there seems to have been no difference whatever ; that is to say, neither at school nor at home, except here and there, was anything done by anybody to provide pleasures, amuse- ments, or excitements for the young. Now, though much is suggested by this interesting fact, all that has to be noted here is that the view of life presented was accepted by the children and acted upon by them when they grew up. How do we know this ? Simply because that state of things lasted for centuries. Discomfort must have been wonderfully prevalent, and not only did children grow up to perpetuate it, but they did so apparently without the smallest reluctance or protest. It is true that society 8o HOME TRAINING [iv ultimately changed its ways ; but that fact, in reahty a very surprising one, must not blind us to the long years that elapsed first. The assertion that the normal thing is for the home training to be passed on as it was received, does not mean that there is no influence powerful enough to modify it. Let us observe meantime how late the change was in coming. If it is seriously asserted that the third doctrine, which is an illogical jumble of the other two, is seldom or never taught, I would say in answer that it is by far the most prevalent of the three ; and that, in spite of obvious disadvantages, it is handed on, and shows every symptom of holding its own victoriously. An illogical " jumble " means here a mixture of the doctrine that life means a constant denial of natural desires with that which asserts that it provides means of self-indulgence, and that there is no reason why these means should not freely be used. Now by mixing them I mean acknowledging the first and acting on the second. There is a deep and unassailable instinct in the Teutonic peoples and in the Eastern races which prompts them to recognize the moral worth of asceticism or resistance to natural desires "per se^ and a disposition to believe that the highest life iv] CHRIST AND THE CHILD MIND 8i will always exhibit some form of asceticism. But individuals are remarkably ready to show by their lives that along with this instinct they take the pleasurable element in life to be the thing really worth striving for. For instance, it has been said that nobody " works " unless he is obliged. Omitting for the present the deeper significance of this indictment, let us notice that if it is approximately correct it supports my contention completely. I do not say that literally everybody is able without misgiving to hold these two opposing theories at once, but that very many people can and do, and that of these very many are parents, and that the power of being inconsistent in a vital matter without being unhappy is passed on to the children so effectively that schoolmasters, if they try to correct it at all, try for the most part in vain. One of the ways in which parents succeed in passing it on is by giving lollipops to a child if he has been " good." This particular practice is perhaps less common than it was, but it is far from being extinct. Has anyone ever adequately explained its effect ? Many people, like Almond of Loretto, have attacked it on the ground that it increases the power of sensual desire. This may be, but it is a trifle compared with the underlying fact that it F 82 HOME TRAINING [iv lowers duty to God and man to the level of common, coarse gratification. It tells a child who is engaged in forming an estimate of human life on which he may act, that the pleasurable element in life is vastly important, so worthy of his highest regard that it may be used for the very noblest purpose conceivable, viz. is a reward for that which we call moral effort, that mysterious and wonderful thing which, however ready we are to shirk it ourselves, we are fain to worship in others. Doubtless some reader will say that this is over- stated : " We have come to see the folly of this sort of thing and nowadays avoid it. It may be admitted that the last fifty years have seen a reaction against the old-fashioned discipline of the home, which perhaps has gone too far, but recently there has been a check, and it is only you cranky idealists who see much amiss in modern methods. Moreover, your criticism assumes that a child of four is strictly rational — an absurd assumption when it is remembered that, as Provost Salmon, an eminently sane observer, once said, ' The older you grow, the less you will think of logic as a force in human affairs.' " The answer to this objection will require a new chapter. For in so far as my appeal is a matter of argument, it depends upon certain iv] CHRIST AND THE CHILD MIND 83 broad truths about the human mind being admitted. The first is that as soon as we begin to have any individuality at all we begin to form a theory of life, and to act upon the theory. It is impossible for it to be otherwise, since to have no theory at all is to be an idiot, and I suppose individuality and idiocy are not compatible. At any rate, every symptom points to a certain theory being formed and consistently acted on, provided that we take the word " consistently " in the Greek sense of o/iaAcS? avcojuLoXog. In other words, if a young boy is presented by his parents with a picture of life in disorder, he will conclude that for him too a disordered life is the only one possible. But this conclusion is not reasoned out, but drawn from the only facts available to the child. If in some land visited by Gulliver we could imagine a child living with three fathers representing severally and with equal consistency one of the three views of life under discussion, that child would be obliged to choose one of the three, and probably he would follow whichever of them seemed to promise most speedy gratification. But he would be in a position favourable to impartiality and reasoning, being obliged to choose between equals. Ordinarily, however, his choice is not between equals at all, but between things so unequal that it 84 HOME TRAINING [iv almost ceases to be a choice. If his two parents live a life predominantly unselfish, the son will infer that such is the life for him to lead, because no other is shown him with anything like the same clearness and authority. Similarly if their life is one of gratification and self-indulgence. That too he will follow, and so far I describe him as if he were logically minded, though in reality it is far more a matter of compulsion than of logic, as we admit when we say, " Poor fellow, he never had a chance." But the third hypothesis is the important one. Suppose the parents' two lives are divergent — one selfish, the other not, or both pretty evenly mixed : the child is not in the least surprised, but is bound to believe that a mixed and inconsistent theory of life is the one to follow ; he is as ready to be inconsistent as the opposite, and in point of fact is quite consistent in choosing inconsistency, since no other course has been presented to him, and it is far too early for him to see that there is anything to object to in contradictions. If a wayfarer starts from the meeting-place of three roads, there is little doubt which he will adopt, supposing two of them are hidden from his eyes. How these principles work out we have now to consider. V: DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT T MUST remind the reader of the point we -■■ have reached. We found that there are three views of the problem of desires (or inclina- tion or temptation or sin) which are presented to a child: either they are to be resisted, or they are to be indulged, or life is a mixture of the two. It should be observed that the last wears a sinister likeness to the theory denounced by Christ in the words " Ye cannot serve God and Mammon " : " serve " means attach yourself loyally to, as to a master. A man may very often do something to please B, C, or E, but if all the time he is the servant of A the question of where his true allegiance is is settled. So taught the great Teacher of the foremost peoples of the earth. The inference is that the theory which jumbles up the two doctrines, that of inclination, or resistance to inclination, really comes in practice to a sort of alternation between the two : an obedience first to one then the other : while all the time there is a numerical advantage being 85 86 HOME TRAINING [v given to one : the number of concessions made to one is never equal to those made to the other, or if it is it is only for a moment. Very soon the one draws ahead of the other ; and as life goes on, the distance between the two numbers increases till even the most purblind spectators can detect it. The allegiance meantime to one or to the other is in reality determined very early in life. Acts of obedience to desire or of self- yielding to goodness may be nearly balanced arithmetically: but the preference of one over the other begins to be a fact in a young life, who can tell when ? What I am contending for is that the third of these, the jumble theory, is probably the easiest to learn, certainly the easiest to practise, and, in reality, is not a compromise between the other two, but a feeble and stupid form of subservience to desire such as interrupts the character-growth of all men more or less, but is most deadly when it is not discerned. In trying to establish this contention I hope to set the two objections stated above in their true place. There are certain dispositions and powers in children which at the cost of some repetition must be enumerated, (i) A tendency to yield to inclination. (2) A desire to interpret life. v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 87 (3) A faculty for so doing ; (4) according to the facts presented. (5) A tendency to give a primary place to those presented by his parents. These are sufficient for the present. Let us consider the effect of a very common incident, the child hearing his father grumble about things he has to do. A mild and genteel form of grumbling is among educated people almost universal. The prominence in ordinary minds of the idea of necessity, the frequent sound of the word " must," are signifi- cant of an underlying doctrine of life, which to the child, if he were rational, would be puzzling enough. Apparently his father is eager to obey his inclinations, which are generally of a simple kind, easily understood by the diminutive but observant critic ; they are ordinary appetites, demanding a scientifically cooked and quite ample meal, the time of which must not be altered if it can possibly be avoided : if it cannot, a loss of temper is looked upon not only as justifiable but praiseworthy. Inclination also prompts to fairly frequent light reading and spells of time from which mental effort is carefully banished. But to secure these ends the purpose to which the main current of life is directed is frequently and seriously interrupted. The making of money, 88 HOME TRAINING [v obviously necessary for the hire of a competent cook, or the command of accelerated locomotion, is very often set aside quickly but firmly for many days together, till it might be thought that it had never been a serious object at all. But at length this anomaly is explained : either the money is already made, or there is a partner, a Mr. Jorkins, who works the obscure machine of business in the background, producing enough gold pieces to pay for the necessary, that is, the pleasant things. Meantime in the father's view of life, which of course is right, the comparative importance of the pleasant things as againt the dull working of the machine in some unattractive edifice away from home is manifested first by frequency of the interruptions to which the latter is exposed; secondly, by the grumbling protests with which he resumes his work. So far the keynote of the father's life is to the child not very difficult to catch. It is the principle of obeying the inclinations, though the inclina- tions of the adult are curiously diilerent in some cases from the child's own, but not more than can be accounted for by the lapse of time. But there are some really baffling questions that start up frequently. Why does his father so often do things that make him grumble ? He himself soon v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 89 becomes accustomed to having his own desires sometimes thwarted, sometimes indulged by his mother, but why either of them should ever do things they evidently dislike remains quite in- explicable : for instance, just as his father has got settled down to his newspaper or a pipe on Sunday after breakfast he is summoned off to church and, oddly enough, goes, though the only result of such effort seems to be recurrent dissatisfaction with the sermon. Or when begging letters come, it is very singular that this pattern of conduct should always growl at them, and yet often give something or say that he will. Two questions at least are now mooted in the boy's mind. If the thing is worth doing, why grumble about it ? If it is not worth doing, why does he do it at all ? After some few years, the boy discovers that the adult's life is spent not only in providing for his inclinations and toiling to make money for the purpose, but in a third quite different endeavour, viz. to satisfy a vague, fickle and shifting set of demands which he ultimately learns to call " public opinion," or " propriety," or the " right thing." It is a somewhat tyrannical force not unfrequently interrupting the life of desire, as when his mother tells the father that he must come and call upon Mrs. Tompkins with her ; 90 HOME TRAINING [v and should the matter reach the stage of a dispute the boy sometimes hears it closed by an appeal to what people will say. This sheds some light on the situation, but what in the world does it all mean ? Or again, as his own wishes are sometimes rudely thwarted, the boy — whom we will call Jack — gradually learns that this happens when his own gratification would interfere with his father's. Jack happens to enjoy banging doors or whistling " Rule Britannia " out of tune on the stone stair- case. The father happens to dislike both, and checks the two activities with an energy more summary than is spent on any other incident of family life. So far this conduct, though it coerces Jack into thinking about other people, deepens his belief in the paramountcy of inclination as the ruling force in every one's life. So he suits him- self to these various claims rapidly ; foreseeing the time when he can shake them off, as a yoke, and submit himself instead to the milder sway of public opinion, supposing he should find that obeying the latter made life easier than dis- obeying it. Religion as an influence in the boy's life remains to be dealt with later ; but we must imagine that along with the exhibition of the above principles v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 91 of conduct which the father gives, Jack has for years been taught something about an unseen Being and has heard a good deal sporadically about His power. His justice and His love. But since he was an infant, though there have been allusions to this Almighty Father at uncertain intervals of time in the ordinary family life, there seems to have been a steady and successful effort to keep this whole subject apart from that which begins to trouble Jack not a little (for he is now twelve years of age), viz. the growth of new inclinations and a constant recurrence of the old ones, making it often necessary for him either to indulge them surreptitiously so as to avoid collisions, or to go through quite unnecessary dis- comfort in denying them. But this remoteness of the idea of GOD from the boy's trials cannot be called a very serious perplexity, since he sees that to his parents it is quite easy to acknowledge the existence of an Unseen Father, respectfully and even reverently, as long as no very searching problem of conduct has arisen. As soon as it does, the upshot is a compound of deference to a rather troublesome public opinion, and to certain strong personal desires which occasionally conflict with propriety but as a rule have been taught to conform. 92 HOME TRAINING [v By this time Jack's notions of life are chaotic, and though he is very young the difficulty of interpreting things sometimes causes him uneasi- ness from which he only escapes temporarily by giving up the attempt. But the result of course is to inspire him with doubt as to the existence of anything which really can be called law in the universe. He began his conscious life with busily trying for many hours in the day to unify his experiences. It was a delight to him to realize that the stickleback and the shrewmouse were creatures possessed like himself of the never- ending wonder called life : and to hear stories of unseen men who lived long ago and were evidently very human like himself : and as long as he could go on unifying things, all learning was a pleasure to him and he felt in himself a growing perception of law everywhere. But the time came when this process was strangely interrupted, first by the intrusion of public opinion into his horizon, next by the influence of his school-studies, which in some cases tended to be powerfully subversive of his previous notions of the reign of law. And yet these influences all added together are far less disordering to his mind than the impossibility of making anything of his father's ethics combined with the vigour of the desire for pleasure within himself. v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 93 It is worth while to lay hold as firmly as in us lies of the effect of a chaotic view of law in a young mind. In the persistent attempt to inter- pret life, which is the evidence of all sound vitality in childhood, nothing positive comes out clear except the power of inclination, and the check of public opinion on it. That is to say public opinion or propriety first appears on the scene as a check, but of course it is not very long before the mystery of its intrusion is practically solved by the growing boy. He finds that con- flicts with it are not worth while, either at home or at school. This is an early discovery, prompted by his parents' example ; but by degrees as he practises conformity he learns that concession to the intruder is only another form of self-indul- gence. The next stage is the acquiring the knack of concealing the selfishness of his life. After all, propriety is an easy master, because there are so many of his desires with which it hardly interferes at all — and, in fact, liberty in regard to these is best purchased by decorously bridling the others. When propriety is positive in its demands, this lesson is learnt soon after the nursery, because the nursery, the schoolroom and the school all combine to enforce it. There was 94 HOME TRAINING [v a time when Jack found a pleasure in bodily mal- treatment of others, but that was some years ago, and now {atat. sixteen) it is easy to abstain. Indeed he finds it pays to go farther and occa- sionally put himself out a little for the con- venience of others. It is odd, no doubt, that to a certain point complaisance makes life pleasanter, but it does, and so in strict moderation he practises it. Now comes the really bewildering time. Propriety has proved itself a good guide when she speaks ; but in regard to many problems she is as mute as the grave. Long before sixteen, Jack has found means of gratifying his sensual appetite as his father does, with strict regard to public opinion which in much of this matter says nothing. As to over-eating, a great deal of gratification can be got in that department, and public opinion seems to think it quite natural for boys : and in grosser pleasures too with a little caution Jack finds himself able to indulge his inclinations almost undisturbed. Or he may be a boy to whom sensuality is not at all a snare. He may be ansemic, and listlessness is to him the easiest way of solving the problem of life. Listless therefore he is, and except for occasional objurgations from the v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 95 '^Governor" and some exhortations from the captain of his house football eleven at school, all of which he soon learns will be practically ineffectual, nothing occurs to make him think that listlessness is not as good a thing for him as activity. Or he may be a boy of fine physique and full of energy. By degrees he discovers that if he uses this quality first in winning distinction at cricket and football and then in a rather aimless hustle of manifold activities with phil- anthropic names, he can fill up his time pretty weli, gain something of a reputation, and occupy his mind enough to banish reflection as to what all this means. But meantime he has imbibed the notion that he must make a livelihood, and so he seizes the opportunity of an ' ' opening in the city '' and begins to earn money. Soon his eagerness is quickened by a certain excitement belonging to the pursuit : and he joins the vast army of those whose time, energy, and faculties are all devoted to the pursuit of gain : ignorant of the saying of a very wise man, " the desire to get more is the worship of a phantom." * But a phantom he ultimately finds it to be, and the * Such is a literal rendering of the Greek words translated " Covetousness is Idolatry." — Col. Hi. 5. 96 HOME TRAINING [v discovery is fraught with an unspeakable yearning after something, he knows not what. Or worse still, he never discovers that the object of his quest is not solid reality, and so he continues in it with unabated zest till his life ends. The upshot then is that if Jack is by nature sensual he will become a decorously sensual man ; if he is inclined for a quiet life he ^m\\ quietly amuse himself, offending nobody and doing nobody any good ; if he is vigorous he will spend his strength on some bustling endeavour to win either fame or money. And so on through the gamut of activities or non-activities. Human egoism chooses its own line. What is certain is that there is nothing whatever in the training described to counteract its all-pervading, subtle, and devastating power. A few sporadic hints, a little impulse towards higher things due to the mother's love in very early years are quite impotent to arrest the general drift of the life which is inevitably of the inclination order. The singular fact which emerges is that public opinion, the chameleon-like guide and guardian which the boy accepts in default of anything nearer or more personal, not only speaks with tones vary- ing from one time to another, but contradicts its own assumptions so glaringly that by the time he v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 97 comes to think at all about the real meaning of this jumble of principles and convention he cannot help discerning its uselessness to him as an interpreter of anything. More than that, he may be led finally not only to distrust its guidance but to assume more and more that when it says go to the right, he had better go to the left, and vice versa^ simply because the most striking instances of heroism are the lives of men and women who have not only ignored public opinion but reso- lutely combated it, and because they combated it have in the long run captured it, and by abjuring worldliness have brought the world to their feet. This startling paradox it is true fails to startle some ; and startles others only for a time and with diminishing power ; but as a boy is a reason- ing being it cannot fail to deepen the bewilder- ment with which he looks out on life. Consider if this can be othervdse. For years Jack has learnt to yield to his inclinations of whatever kind they be, either towards sensuality cautiously and decorously practised, or towards some gratification of his natural impulses with which public opinion interferes hardly at all except to encourage and approve, i,e. he abandons himself to some form of the quest for fame or popularity or ease or wealth. But his allegiance G 98 HOME TRAINING [v to public opinion has been undermined gradually and gently by certain recurrent presentations of lives led in gallant and attractive obedience to a different master : sermons in school pulpits, books about brave men, possibly some teaching about Scripture v^orthies, show him a more excellent way : but what do these things mean ? How can they be right if they contradict the steady, powerful influence of his earlier years at home ? But the old objection will be once more urged that all this assumes too much rationality in children. They don't infer and think things out and then calmly adopt a certain line of action ; their lives are shaped we know not how. On the other hand, we must beware of dogma- tizing about children's minds unless the evidence is with us. My contention is that the rough sketch which I have given of the tendency of the moral training of many homes is borne out by the evidence of later years. The general drift of the majority of young lives is exactly what we should expect to find it, starting as we do from this assumption. They are strongly egoistic, dominated by inclination but for a long time pushed hither and thither by the currents of public opinion. v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 99 Could any influence be much more dominant than that of the doctrine of the " right thing '' in the public school ? You may argue against it, you may deride it, you may try to crush it but except here and there you will be dis- regarded. Boys will meekly accept a code of galling restrictions on their liberty if once they believe it is the voice of public opinion. In short their lives are, broadly speaking, divided into two allegiances : the one to inclination, the other to propriety ; the second being the great modifier of the first. As to the first, let us never forget, though it often has been forgotten, that many youngsters are not sensual, but yet very selfish ; but as their selfishness is of the tame civilized order, or attractive in its whimsical waywardness or fresh vitality, it is spared the animadversion that is meted out freely to coarse- ness, sloth, or dishonesty, when detected; and a deeply selfish character may gain much credit under these conditions all through the time of youth, especially if its owner has caught enough linguistic facility to win prizes. But this remark trenches upon the opportunity of the school ; of which more anon. Let us at present observe that given a great variety of temperament, there is a striking conformity of 100 HOME TRAINING [v observed results to antecedents such as I have described. It is possible for parents, nay, it is not un- common, to abandon the attempt to understand these matters, and let things take their course. Many think that the results of home-training are too uncertain to form the basis of any principle ; and when once this opinion is formulated indolence of mind prompts to " letting things slide." Give the child the ordinary sort of environment, and if he comes of a fairly good stock, which of course the parents are inclined to believe, things will turn out fairly well, and anyhow educational faddists are to be avoided ; so the father goes back vnth a tranquil mind to business and the mother finds social life more and more exacting, and both are accordingly spared to a large extent the painful task of reflecting what is to be the end of it all. It may be that in England we talk more than we need of education ; we certainly quarrel to excess over it ; but no one can accuse us of over- estimating its effect. We habitually under- estimate it, and this is owing to a certain blindness to facts. A friend of mine years ago, after taking charge of guttersnipes in East London — the real raw material of humanity who had never darkened v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND' DRIFT l6i the doors of any school — remarked that if people would give more heed to beings of this sort they would understand what an immense difference education makes. In what respect ? Less intel- lectually than morally. These East End boys lived the inclination life in its most unmitigated form ; till they were taken in hand and drilled they knew of no reason why they should not shop-lift except the policeman at the street corner : between right and wrong they drew no distinction whatever, and had never conceived of one. This is really instructive testimony, and it enables one to imagine what the world would be if children were not trained at all. But more important by far than that, it allows us to trace pretty clearly the power of the two grand ingre- dients of all sound training, law and love ; and to discern in the conventional easygoing home-life exactly where the shortcomings are, and how powerfully and permanently they affect the output. But I wish to testify out of the experience of a schoolmaster that by the time a boy is fourteen the real wonder of home-training can be seen — not in the cases where it has been marred and muddled by double-mindedness or, as Bishop Ridding expressed it, by " craziness, haziness and m HdME TRAINING [v laziness," but where it has been based on sound principle and faithfully carried out. I maintain that the products of a really good home-training in this country are still as they always have been : a grand evidence of what can be done. It is fashionable to acquiesce in the opposite extreme ; to impute our worst failures to the disorder of Nature ; tut it is absurd to suppose that the noble manliness of self-mastery that is to be found in quite young boys is to be ascribed only to natural endowment. It gives evidence, even so early, of conflict against desires and victory won not without effort. But I must leave this fascinating theme to a later chapter. So much then briefly of the evidence. To those who still feel that this picture of children's development postulates too much reasoning power in them I would urge that quite apart from such evidence as I have given, it is not a matter of reasoning power, but of yielding to overmastering influences which insist on life being interpreted in a certain way. We must never lose sight of the fact that the child is only unreasoning in the sense that he has tested very few facts for him- self ; but where he does test them he draws the correct inference without fail, though he often cannot explain why. v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 103 If then for several years, during which he is gradually forming a working theory of life, he sees double- mindedness in those whom by nature he is bound to imitate, the result must be that he commits himself to this kind of Ufe simply because he knows of no other. As already implied, this double-mindedness means paying of respect to a certain principle and in practice conforming to the opposite. The respected principle is that of unselfishness, and we are all ready to show not only respect but homage to it when it is enforced up to a certain point by public opinion. But beyond that point we refuse to go, no matter how unstinted is the admiration with which the mass of mankind, after a due interval^ set themselves to worship those who have carried unselfishness to an extreme. Now as soon as the conformity to public opinion which demands unselfishness is practised for a selfish reason, either to avoid collisions, or to secure favours later, or to gain fame or votes, etc. etc., the life outwardly betrays double- mindedness, but the motive of action is single- mindedly selfish. The behaviour is a blurred picture of inconsistencies. We imagine Jack's father as giving to charities because he must ; because if he refrained the philanthropic peer in 104 HOME TRAINING [v the neighbourhood would cease to ask him to dinner ; but he grumbles as he pays. Then he takes Jack to church that he may hear the words " It is more blessed to give than to receive," and if he did not think the words true he would surely stay away when they are to be read ; but none the less as soon as the opportunity for giving is put straight before him he grumbles ; as if it were really more blessed to receive than to give. It is easy for some adults to see that such conduct when it is not their own is stupid, hypocritical and fatal to all peace of mind and growth in virtue. But the point to be emphasized is that it is astonishingly common, and in thousands of instances no life which is outwardly and inwardly single-minded is ever presented to children. A child is so far irrational that he cannot detect the hypocrisy of this life or consciously compare it with what he may hear about Moses or St. Paul, Damien or Havelock. But he is quite rational enough to conclude that if there is no other interpretation of life but a muddled one, then the muddled interpretation is the one to follow : since the one thing he cannot do is not to interpret at all. But before embarking on the next topic I will notice a criticism ordinarily made at an early v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 105 stage in this subject, viz. that the schoolmaster ought to set all this sort of thing right. Doubtless there is much said and written at the present day which implies that if only school- masters were men of ordinary common sense there is no limit to the splendid effect they might exercise on the life of England. Whether Public Schools, for instance, are praised or disparaged, flattered or sneered at, this singular and quite baseless idea is assumed. People tend either to maunder over schoolmasters as having wrought a mighty work, or to deride them because though it is so easy they have done nothing at all. But it is forgotten that the one view no less than the other involves the huge assumption that a pro- fessional outsider can counteract the influence to which Nature has given the prime opportunity of laying the foundation-stones : in other words it is wildly supposed, without challenge or demur, that the school is stronger than the home. This requires examination. A male child leaves his home for three-quarters of the year and mixes with other male children, and after four or five years passes on to a society in which adolescents are included, whom by a law of Nature he finds himself bound to imitate. This imitation, however, only to a limited extent io6 HOME TRAINING [v takes an outward form. Jack junior of course hopes to make school-life interesting for himself by doing well in games in which he sees his seniors excel. But the hope which is in him quite un- quenchable is that he will learn to think about life in general the same as Jack senior. Among the small fry in a large school no topic is of such interest as any incident which throws light on the big fellows' opinions : of course that means opinions on matters within the small boy's ken, In short the fact on which rests the unique system of law and liberty, evolved nobody knows how. in the English Public School is simply this : that small boys are imitative animals, and that the big boys are big enough and old enough to be in their eyes worthy of imitative effort. From the master's point of view this means that he can entrust the big boys with a great deal of responsi- bility in school government as their influence is unassailably strong ; and it may be remarked that in the colleges at Oxford and Cambridge there is no fact parallel to this. The senior under- graduates have no authority whatever, simply because the freshman thinks himself as good as any of them. But these youths who dominate public opinion in the school world are themselves the product v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 107 of homes where, as already described, public opinion is the ruling force, in most cases superior to that of the parents, because it obviously sways even them : and the upshot is that in the school community the collective voice is irresistible ; it is unlike that which sounds among adults, because whereas among the latter an emphatic pronounce- ment of opinion in one county generally awakes up an opposite pronouncement from another, and the air is alive with discord, in a school society the few who have misgivings about any- thing said are mostly too immature and un- influential to criticize openly with any chance of being listened to. Hence the ordinary attitude towards public opinion is that, be it wise or foolish, easy or tyrannical, the grand secret of a tranquil life is to obey it. What is the effect of this state of things on the question before us — namely, how a growing boy forms his ideas of the right attitude to be adopted towards his desires in general ? The answer is that whatever was the effect on his mind of the intrusion of public opinion within his horizon at home, that effect is immensely strengthened at school. At home in very early years the first perception of the power of public opinion must have sowed the seeds of disorder io8 HOME TRAINING [v in the mind long before Jack could have put his thoughts into words. Disorder, because in spite of his instinct for unifying phenomena, for classifying and distinguishing everything he sees, his natural interpretation of life is upset as soon as he sees his parents doing the two incongruous things : laughing at their neighbours behind their backs and yet slavishly and grumblingly obeying their collective voice. The laws of conduct become from that time onward inexplicable. The boy will obey them and contradict them because he has no choice but imitation, but he will never get an answer to the riddle why do his parents behave so, because there is none. At school he finds certain human beings in loco parentis for three-quarters of each year. If the school is in good order, the interferences with his inclinations will be more frequent and more summary than at home, and some of the requirements will remain utterly bewildering. But he is allowed a great deal of liberty, and after all the most important thing for his own peace of mind is to adapt himself to the general demands of the society in which he moves. If he has the temperament which allows him to do this easily he will have a very happy school life. But obviously he learns a lesson which corroborates the teaching of the v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 109 home, viz. that boys who conform to what others demand will have a good time : those who cannot conform will have a bad time. But this is exactly what I am contending for. Life for Jack now growing up is in an ever increasing measure a probation in which he has to exercise a certain skill in indulging his inclinations and seeking his own idea of pleasure. Public opinion fluctuates up and down, now being slightly puritanic, anon very easygoing : as he finds this is the case at school, so still more when he first travels about in the outer world. But the masters, we are asked, cannot they stop this sort of thing and give the boy something of an ideal ? It is best not to reckon on any such uplifting power from this quarter. There are of course a few very exceptional cases on record in which lasting influence of the idealistic kind is ascribed to some strong personality like Thring, Arnold or Temple among schoolmasters : but it is certain that the law of nature is the influence of the home ; the normal outcome of education is the outcome of the home. But as a rule the school cannot plant what the home has neglected to plant, viz. a certain view of life and its responsibilities which is above the dictates of public opinion. Speaking 110 HOME TRAINING [v deliberately, I can testify that I have hardly come across one such where there is not a strong presumption that the seed was sown in the early years. I hope this will become plainer in the second part of this book. But meantime people generally forget that the masters themselves are the fruit of double-minded homes. Some of the silliest utterances to which sane men are condemned to listen are those of rhetorical persons who assume that schoolmasters, parsons, and the like are a class apart from the society in which they have been born and bred. If society as a whole, or nearly a whole, inculcates with all its might a selfish view of life, it is ludicrous to suppose that all schoolmasters should be wholly unaffected by the teaching : especially as all humanity is more or less double-minded. Further, the school according to English ideas is, even in theory, bound to be to some extent a mirror of the world. That is to say, society demands that on the whole the worldly view of life shall prevail in every school : that canons of conduct based on convention and propriety shall on the whole be the guiding rule of life there as elsewhere : the idea being that if they did not so prevail the school would not be so good a preparation for after-life as it now is. It would not be difficult v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT in to find arguments in support of this contention, and, as will be admitted, if school-life were really free from temptation, and boys in their tempera- ments and disposition the same as they are — an unthinkable condition, of course — certainly it would be a poor preparation for the larger world. But more than that. Society has its own way of enforcing its own standard on the schools, viz. by refusing to send the boys there. Let us take a rather Utopian case of a school in which a marvellously high level of purity and industry and Christian charity prevailed among the boys, but which maintained this level by a strict system of Confession, strong sacramental teaching and numerous chapel services — is it likely that the school would be financially stable ? Suppose, further, that a large majority of boys were as virtuous as the small minority is — I mean posi- tively powers for good, not negatively free from blame — ^would their parents all feel comfortable when they returned from school for the holidays ? I doubt it. The truth is that when the life aimed at and achieved by the father and mother is thoroughly mediocre, cautiously respectable and decorously selfish, they would not tolerate a school, if such existed, which transformed their 112 HOME TRAINING [v offspring into the splendid type of youth still, thank GOD, to be found in every big school. They would be proud of him perhaps, in certain company : but they would be a little uneasy in his presence ; and the vague misgiving which now and then flits across their hearts at the signs of selfishness, not yet well- dissembled, of their very ordinary son, is preferable to a self-reproach which they could never understand. Of course these suppositions are impossible, but they indicate the simple fact very often ignored, that what the society is, such will the school be. The schoolmasters, themselves pro- ducts of the society, have to undertake the raising of youthful souls in a singularly cramped and straitened position. The first thing they must not do is to wake up in a young boy any dissatisfaction with his own home : so imperative is the divine law of honouring the father and mother : so necessary is it to delay to the last possible moment the sad disillusionment as to the adequacy of the home view of life and the failure of the home-law to interpret to the eager young mind the divine law. That tragic time must not be anticipated, and so the teacher is compelled to abstain from denunciation, which is more than any prophet has ever done, and find v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 113 a refuge in that which doubtless is better, positive precept and example. Again, not only is the public opinion of boys acting on each other the dominant influence in the vast majority of cases, but it is right that it should be. A school can do much in the way of secondary preparation for life : it can teach a young fellow how to get on with his equals — a most valuable lesson : it can provide him with a mass of interests which keep him, if he is not abnormal, from introspection for many a year and postpone the awakening of self-consciousness — a very common and debilitating infirmity of young England ; it can give abundant oppor- tunity for vigorous social action and consideration for others ; but it cannot plant the idea that service is the best thing in life, if the ground is already occupied with the conviction that it is only second ; pleasure (interpreted according to the age reached) being the first. Now if the school is to go on in the future doing this valuable work for the character, the social influence of young mind on young mind must be vigorous and vital. Many a strenuous schoolmaster has begun his work by thinking to interfere with this, the grand natural law, that boys learn readily, deeply and permanently from each other, but in all H4 HOME TRAINING [v normal cases only with hesitation, fitfully and temporarily from men. Nature has planted a very deep gulf between the boy and the adult, and our young " beak/' as he is commonly called, if he has a respectable endowment of common sense, comes to discern this fact before it is too late ; learning, not without real enlargement of his horizon, that though he has a power of doing widespread and visible harm, he must not look for evidences of his doing any considerable good, and yet he may be sure he can help in the spreading of something invisible and very precious, and in exceptional cases perhaps sow the very seed of the higher life itself. Thus in the hope of doing a very humble unnoticed subordinate work for the Highest and with the Highest he loses his own soul in the steadfast endeavour to which the noblest of all lay-professions summons him. But one of the conditions of all true success is that he recognizes before very long the limitations of his own sphere. The school public opinion, super- ficial though it always is, silly though it often is, low though it sometimes is, not only will be but ought to be the main influence in school life. If it were otherwise, school would be an artificial hothouse training for the after-life which is an affair of variations of temperature and pretty v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 115 sharp storms, and a man who has to walk thinly- clad along bleak hill-sides will fare ill if he has passed his youth encased in cotton-wool. In the main we shall be judged according as we have dealt faithfully with our equals and contempo- raries ; and it is from and through his contem- poraries that the English schoolboy gets the buffets and ought to get the encouragement needful for his manhood. And all the time the public opinion which expresses and wields this influence is the direct outcome of many single homes. Most of the children have unconsciously, but in very truth, made up their minds for good and all, before they go to the Public School, as to the main character of the life that lies before them. It is to each one a stage either for the gratification of his own desires, whatever they may be, or for a closer conformity to the highest thing he knows. Nay, even at nine years, as any discerning master of a preparatory school can tell us, there are indica- tions which show in which direction the main stream of life is beginning to flow. " He is a rare troublesome pickle and always getting into mischief, but at bottom sound and loyal " : such is the verdict not unfrequently passed on a vigoorus little scion of the big- jawed, bright-eyed ii6 HOME TRAINING [v men of thought and action whose portraits are to be seen in our surviving cathedral windows ; and what do the words mean ? They mean that the child's outfit for living is an endowment of vitality which disposes him to think little of all that is tame, humdrum and inert ; those episodes in boy-life which are still described in words as a '^ high old time " appeal to him. His estimate of the value of the repressive side of school or home is not extravagant, indeed he is ready to ban it as an indescribable nuisance, were it not that it comes into his experience strangely blended with something mysterious and winning and not to be forgotten ; the love of father and mother which has never been the outcome of weak surface emotion or fitful sentiment, but of tranquil deeps of character and yearnings after all that is noble and true. They have from time to time revealed to him an element in life so august and high, so stable and severe, that even the large freedom of his father's doings is subject to it ; and more- over it passes into his thoughts with increasing vividness as the years go by as something springing from an unseen world by which he finds visible things are encompassed and controlled ; the dim region of the divine, so remote and sublime, yet so potent, so personal and so near. This element v] DOUBLE-MINDEDNESS AND DRIFT 117 in human life is called Law, and though the active youngster often fails to measure its far-reaching and irresistible dominion ; though he is sur- rounded hy strange barriers against which he will often run his head in vain, a grand truth lights up whole reaches of that which on Sundays is spoken of as the Narrow Way : viz., that the grave, stern presence overshadowing all the joyousness of school-life is the same imperious thing which he has been learning to recognize at home, though there its aspect was milder and more benign. This is enough. Inexplicable as it often is, inconsistent as it sometimes seems to be, yet Law, as his boyhood slowly learns, is in truth that by which his childish mind was overawed. As an outcome of this somewhat lengthy discussion of school-life I make bold to affirm that the following conclusions hold good : (i) That when, as often, the school-age is spoken of as the most impressionable time of a human being's life, evidence which ought to be familiar to every one in contact with boys and girls is ignored. In all normal cases school does not plant, but only fosters, the seed of the higher life. Nature dictates that the planting should be done at home. (2) That this curtailing of the power of the ii8 HOME TRAINING [v school is due not only to human infirmity among schoolmasters, but also to certain permanent characteristics both of school and home. (3) That these characteristics cannot be sud- denly changed without the spoiling of some dis- tinctive and highly prized influences of the English Public School. (4) Hence that in all normal cases not only does the allegiance to something higher than inclina- tion begin in early childhood, if it is to begin at all, but, conversely, if it is not begun then, the ideals of boyhood cannot be expected to rise above the teaching of public opinion, v^hich very seldom demands anything more than a prudent and pleasing selfishness. VI : TYPES OF FAILURE 13EF0RE entering on the deeper parts of our subject, it is necessary to guard against the indictment that the picture is too dark. It will be certainly thought and possibly said that among our young men there is a con- siderable and perhaps increasing number who give a good deal of time and energy to grave subjects. Social problems occupy more of their thoughts than ever before in English history. The standard of " morals " has risen and is still rising. " Temperance " is so common as to attract little notice; and, in short, the influences of the ordinary home must be more vigorous and inspiring than they have been represented. No one denies that there are bad homes in all classes of society, but they constitute a small minority except perhaps among the very poor, where the sense of parental responsibility is languid, indeed hardly exists ; but it is a pity to make things out worse than they are. This sort of criticism raises an issue which must be made quite clear. In the first place, we have 119 120 HOME TRAINING [vi got into a foolish way of judging a home training by the tone of character shown by a youth of eighteen or nineteen, instead of the man in his prime, say from forty-five to sixty. The fruits of the early trainings are somehow supposed to be mature in the teens, and what comes after is vaguely ascribed to an inherent perverseness of the man himself, or to the goodness of his stock or the influence of his professional work upon him. But this is sheer wrong-headedness and blindness of vision. The fact which alone gives warrant for any such inquiry as that whereon we are engaged is quite undeniable. It is that the early training has a "pre dominating effect for life : other influences tell in their measure, but this is the strongest of all, and where it is single in aim and conviction its effect is visible to the very end, whether it be good or evil. My contention is that this is generally the case. But lest any readers be inclined to shrug their shoulders in contempt of such opinion, I would remark that there is not the slightest occasion to dispute over the exact amount of result that ought to be ascribed to the home, so long as it is agreed that the effect is very deep and permanent. That is enough for any discussion on the subject which does not profess to be exhaustive or metaphysical. vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 121 My conviction is that no limits can be set to the home influence as a factor in the building of character. If others shrink from going quite so far, that is no reason why we should not put our heads together in consultation on the bettering of home training — by far the most important social question of this or of any other day. But perhaps the question before us will be clearer if we quietly contemplate the result in a very large number of cases, and ask ourselves if that is the kind of thing which we parents really hope for, as the best attainable, when we first set about ordering the training of our children. I will for the present select what is to me the more intelligible of the two sexes. Poets and other observers have written eloquently and not unconvincingly on the difiiculty men have ordi- narily found in understanding the working of women's minds. Contributions to this tempting theme could easily be culled from such writers as Euripides, Shakespeare and Pope, but we must resist the temptation to dabble in it and be guided by the fact that, for men writers anyhow, it is a simpler task to trace the development of a man's character back to its early training than it is to explain a woman's in the same way. There 122 HOME TRAINING [vi is something in men's lives which seems to betray- more conformity to a law of sequence from ante- cedent influences, and so men's lives and conduct become more available for the purposes of this inquiry. It may, however, be remarked that even those who are most baffled by the conduct of women would agree that fundamentally their characters must be largely the outcome of train- ing, or at least, that if girls are brought up on principles which have been proved sound for boys, we may feel assured that on the whole we are on the right lines, though it may not be possible to prove it by statistics of results as we can to some extent in the case of their brothers. Again, the very good and the very bad homes may be left on one side : no one, however obtuse- minded, doubts the lasting influence of both one and the other. The matter on which we must form a clear opinion is the power of the average home. I take, then, an ordinary man's history in this country of ours to be something of the following kind. As already described, the child has been taught to bridle some of his inclinations very early in life ; and if they have been of the coarse and obstreperous order, the little person has endured a good many buffets before his tenth vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 123 year. But by that time he begins to detect two reasons which account for this undesirable state of things : the first is that his parents and other adults do not relish some of his activities, which they call tiresome and disgusting or cruel or impolite, so they insist on their suppression ; the second is that in so doing they are obeying public opinion. This discovery he carries away with him to school. There he finds a very coercive public opinion exercised by men on boys ; and for himself a very jolly time if he conforms, and many raps over the knuckles if he does not. His parents seem to think it is all right, so without more ado he conforms, and the years pass quickly by, tolerably free from care. Then comes the plunge into University life, or business or the Army. The main operative prin- ciples whereby his ideas of right and wrong have been formed continue to stand him in fairly good stead. He is young and strong and growing stronger, and by degrees begins to appreciate that people will think well of him if he takes an active part in combating some of the social disorders of the time. So he picks up what knowledge he can and, joining this kind of activity to his earning a livelihood, he becomes a bit of a philanthropist. Associations for benefiting the poor or the weak 124 HOME TRAINING [vi or the sick, or for stirring up patriotism or pro- mulgating particular political views, attract him, and life promises to be a lively and fairly whole- some experiment. Suppose that things go well with him, there develops in him quite naturally and reasonably the feelingwe call self-complacency. Reasonably, because he is conscious of having put out a great deal of effort and is now receiving a desirable reward. He has a digestion at present unimpaired ; enough to live on, most of which has been acquired through his own sagacity and industrious habits ; and more than all this, he has become to some extent an object of respect among his neighbours. Now and then newspapers of repute devote a short paragraph to his sayings and doings ; he aspires, not without confidence, to a place in " Who's Who ? " and occasionally (seldom, we may say) reflects that there will be a tablet to his memory in the south aisle of the parish church. Which reminds us that through these years there has been a certain ingredient of what people call religion in his life ; that is to say, he was taught some prayers by his mother very early indeed, just a sentence or two of monosyllables, and though nothing has ever been added to them, vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 125 he has never altogether discontinued them, but when he has time in the morning and occasionally, from old associations, and if not too sleepy, in the evening as well, he will repeat them on his knees. But at no other time does he consciously refer to them. Indeed, it is curious to reflect on a few experiences in his school life, when he had definitely made up his mind to do something he knew at the time to be wrong, and once something that he is now ashamed to look back on, he still used the childish little formulas : you couldn't expect a lad in his teens to know better, and of course at the time there was no one he could speak to about the matter as his father had once told him that on certain subjects he was to hold his tongue ; and though there was no reason why this injunction should prevent him from picking up what he could of interesting knowledge from his school-fellows, it made him very careful not to mention anything of the sort to his parents. Now and then a man guest would come to the house and the boy somehow detected that he was the sort of person who did not mind talking a little about the matter : but what he learnt from him was rather unpleasant and in a way alarming ; so he never followed the subject up, and of course, never dreamt of definitely 126 HOME TRAINING [vi connecting it with his morning and evening prayers, especially as once or twice his tutor at school — a thoroughly good chap, a fair football- player and without humbug — took him to task very seriously about his conduct but made no allusion whatever to GOD. On this latter subject there were at that time some obscure instincts within him which would have led him to inquire further, had he not once made an attempt in this direction with disagreeable results. It was at the time of his confirmation, which his " people '^ decreed should be in the holidays because his only sister was to be confirmed at the same time, and also because his father thought the local parson was a good sort — that is, he worked hard, preached good practical sermons never more than twenty minutes long, and was the sort of man who, if he had not " gone into the Church," might have been quite a " sportsman." So for three weeks before the confirmation the boy attended the vicar's classes and heard a good deal about the Catechism, which, as was natural and no doubt right, was couched in scriptural language, and therefore meant nothing particular, till one day the parson saw him alone and asked him if there was any difficulty in his life which he would like VI] TYPES OF FAILURE 127 to speak about. Whereupon Jack — for all the time it is our old friend again — felt strongly inclined to say, " Swearing " : to tell the truth, he had rather frequently given way in moments of excitement to this habit, but found that people generally looked on it as rather bad manners, though with a savour of something mysterious about it which made Jack think it would do nicely to fend off the parson's curiosity. But it so happened that there had been a curious experience of Jack's not long before, which may be briefly narrated in order to explain what followed : Patrick, the son of a neighbouring squire, a jolly sort of rather reckless boy, suddenly in the middle of the summer term appeared at his own home in a most crestfallen state and was hurried off by his father in three days to a stranger a long way off and Jack did not see him for quite a year, but picked up from some one that he had been " sent away" from his Public School in disgrace and it was feared that he would not get into the Army. Indeed, some one had discovered the poor fellow one day at home weeping by himself and quite broken down ; but after a year he came back and there was a surprising change in him. He was quieter and more industrious, but in talking 128 HOME TRAINING [vi to Jack would generally speak of things from the point of view of right and wrong, and just now and then showed that what he had heard about GOD was helping him enormously in his ordinary life. This rather startling episode made Jack wish to discover whether anything in " religion " would be of any use to himself, because, to be frank, there were some secret troubles in his moral life which were causing him a good deal of uneasiness in the background. So on the vicar assuring him kindly that he need not be afraid, he made a vigorous effort and conquered his shyness and asked what he should do to get rid of " bad thoughts." The vicar looked a little uncomfortable but gave him some advice, very like what he had previously said, from which he remembered afterwards that if he read the Bible and said his prayers everything would come right ; and Jack was convinced that he had played the fool in talking about the matter at all, as the vicar seemed to think it was not really serious and, anyhow, need not be mentioned again. Jack being but sixteen, was unable at the time to make anything whatever of this. He had a vague but very fitful sense that somehow he had asked for a piece of bread and been given a stone — not a vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 129 scorpion, it is true, but certainly not a pearl. But being an English boy, he had no difficulty in stowing his uneasiness away into a sort of lumber- room of his inner being, where it remained like a brown-paper parcel in an attic full of unused knick-knacks, and grew more and more dusty as it was more and more forgotten. In this way, there came about a divergence in Jack's life between his moral feelings and the thin driblet of religion which, derived from his earliest years, did not quite cease to trickle through the variegated pebbles of his mental water-course till he was about nineteen years old. By that time, or soon after, a certain desire for reality slowly woke within him. He began to feel more dis- tinctly the irksomeness of religious observances, but by itself that would have hardly been suffi- cient to make him discontinue them. The wish for reality reinforced the spiritual indolence which had never been conquered or indeed combated, because nobody had ever told him that there was anything to combat, and his experience of boy- hood had taught him now that, unlike some unfortunate young people, he could conform to the social canons of respectability which he found in vogue ; also that to achieve this, it was not necessary to draw upon his lean religious resources. I 130 HOME TRAINING [vi Hence Jack entered upon his manhood with religion already, though unavowedly, discredited ; and he finds, rather to his surprise, a large warrant in contemporary example for ignoring it altogether as far as outward observance is concerned. So he follows suit ; but not immediately. The first thing to go is attendance at the Holy Commu- nion. Jack had made a practice of attending with fair consistency about once a month since his confirmation at sixteen years old ; but he now finds some leaders of society, evidently " good fellows " and likely to be successful in after life, who continue to attend college chapel or some fashionable West End church in London once a week, but never communicate. And it only seems reasonable that something of his religious practice should go by the board because he is learning that there is such a thing as mental grov^h in certain kinds of mental effort, and that to him, therefore, these are real^ that is, produc- tive of growth, stimulating and lively, while other kinds are dead. For instance, at seventeen years old he had been allowed at school to change the normal literary course of studies for mathematics, where- by his faculty for reasoning and observation had been stirred to activity and he became able vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 131 to distinguish between sets of ideas which to him were lifeless and arid and those which gave promise of vitality. Thus, in cutting down his religious observances to a bare minimum of church-going, Jack not only obeyed his inclina- tions — though he still likes some hymns or some sermons — but conformed to the example of men who seemed to him worth imitating because they were more genuine, somehow, than the parsons he happened to have met, and, anyhow, decidedly more interesting ; while as for his women rela- tions, they were, it is true, all of them commu- nicants, and his mother was slightly distressed at his ceasing to be one, but only slightly, " because," as she said to herself and occasionally to the vicar, " one must be liberal-minded in these days, and after all, some very good, hard-working men are not communicants, and perhaps when Jack is married and has a family of his own it will come right again ; so there it is." Moreover, mathe- matics or something else had lately taught Jack to reason for himself, and to tell the truth, this growth of a new power within him made him hold his nose a little higher in the air than he had ever done before. He was not distinctly aware of any problems in life which did not seem likely to yield in due time to this new faculty ; 132 HOME TRAINING [vi and as he found that the special kind of logic which appealed to him was apparently uninterest- ing to women, he blandly relegated them all to a position of inferiority to that of himself and a few male friends, making up his mind that he would postpone the question of matrimony to a convenient season. For the present, anyhow, female society bores him and he cannot imagine falling in love. Having thus put religion into its proper place, whence it is not likely to intrude on a well-ordered life, he continues his private prayers for a curiously long time considering his strong antipathy to things unreal. But at last they go too, and such religious instincts as he still retains are fairly well satisfied by intermittent church-going, some sacred music, and a few bazaars ; and, as already mentioned, he dabbles in social work of various description in addition to his professional routine, which is punctuated by fairly good holidays. Now so far I have traced, in the most scanty and general outline, a fairly typical young man's character-development, that is to say, the kind of way in which a very common attitude towards the deeper of life's questions comes to be assumed by a man between twenty-five and thirty. In scores of ways, of course, outward framework of vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 133 individual lives varies, but I have no hesitation in calling this development typical in respect of the two grand claims made upon every civilized human being in modern England, viz. to adopt some policy toward his various inclinations and desires, and to take up a certain position toward religion, since the latter word applies not only to outward observances, which might of course be wholly ignored, but to some dim, inarticulate instinct within him which insists on a measure of recognition : very little, it may be said, will keep them from troubling, but it is seldom that they allow themselves at this stage of life to be quite disregarded. We have seen what the answer to the two claims so far has been. Jack has found that a certain amount of snubbing of some kinds of inclination has been necessary to save unpleasant consequences, which might have ensued from the annoying and not quite calculable action of public opinion. But as his desire to stand well with people whom he likes is stronger than his inclinations to sensuality or cruelty or blatant selfishness, he has firmly adopted the policy of denying these desires when they definitely conflict with the claims of public opinion ; and being what he is, it has not been difficult for him 134 HOME TRAINING [vi to be quite consistent so far. That is to say, he is able to congratulate himself because, in regard to sensual temptations, for instance, he is better off than his cousin Tom. Tom is obliged to dodge public opinion by consorting with the laxer sections of society where his immorality is winked at ; and this Jack disapproves of, though he cannot at present say why : he is always expecting that in a year's time he will be able to tell you, but no one yet has ever heard him open his lips on the subject. His attitude towards Tom mean- time is official and guarded. In his heart of hearts he is well content with his own unim- peachable upbringing, since he has learnt to " deny himself " to the required extent, and poor Tom has not. So while Tom can only get along by surrounding himself with associates who demand little or nothing in the way of conduct, Jack is quite at home with the recently knighted solicitor George Mundane, who has given two thousand pounds to a scheme thought of by somebody else for keeping rustics " upon the land " ; and more than that, he doesn't mind dining with the rather eccentric banker, Mr. Excelsior by name, who never seems to think of public opinion at all, though Jack would be the first to admit that there is something about vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 135 Excelsior which makes him always a little uncom- fortable in his presence. While Jack is tending to be more and more interested in his financial ventures and the house he is planning near the excellent golf links at Woking, Mr. E., though not without knowledge of such things, talks of them in a curiously detached way as if his real interest lay elsewhere, and yet it is hard to con- ceive that they do. So Jack "muddles along" in this matter: and though in other respects unlike Lord Dun- dreary, he dismisses the problem with the widely used formula, " There are some things which a fellow cannot understand." However, his self- complacency is an abiding fact, notwithstanding these recurrent and baffling experiences ; and it is also quite reasonable, because, as far as Jack can tell, he has, in choosing public opinion as his main ethical teacher, chosen something eminently sane, reasonable, and withal satisfactory ; that is to say, it has required of him a measure of self-control which after all is not excessive, especially as it freely allows him an ample indulgence in the good things of the table. Jack would be horrified if anyone hinted that he was becoming a glutton, but he always has enjoyed his meals consistently, and now, cet, thirty-five 136 HOME TRAINING [vi he can look forward to this form of recreation for many years to come. But the '' iron hours " go by. This undeniable fact suggests the reflection that in judging of the training of a human being, we should scan the result, not at twenty, as is generally done, but at fifty-five. Some wise man has said that at a stage between forty-seven and fifty-five the human male goes through a deep physical and mental change. As regards the physical, it need not detain us now. As to the mental, I would only remark that, however deep it be, it wears the aspect of tranquillity more often than the corresponding change at fifteen. He further observed that a man of forty-seven begins to settle down on to those principles which are going to guide his conduct and aims for the rest of his life. This I can well believe, in the sense that no fundamental change need ordinarily be looked for after this stage. Only it is a far too daring assumption to suppose that the principles which often begin to be formulated at forty-seven have no connexion with those which in an unformu- lated fashion reigned at thirty-five. Probably, every sane inquirer is convinced that normally there is no point between childhood and fifty-five at which you can say that new views are acquired \ vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 137 as to the great decision between GOD and Mammon. Observation surely teaches that the oft-misued word evolution has a real meaning here, that thirty-five is the outcome of twenty- five as that age is of ten : the only doubt, then, is whether fifty-five is the time of a real fresh start. I see no evidence of it whatever. Possibly the middle-aged man takes a stronger hold on the old principles, whatever they may be. But is it not more likely that what takes place at this age is a strengthening of the disposition to formulate and preach those principles in and out of season ? To put it bluntly, are not most middle-aged men who are prosperous and fairly healthy, prone to talk too much rather than too little ? I do not wish to dogmatize, but to point out that if as has been supposed new principles are grasped, it must be owing to quiet reflection and special experience. Now quiet reflection is just what busy middle-life forgoes ; and I submit that the somewhat noisy interpreting of life, common at fifty-five years of age, is merely the expression of views which were formed previously when the human being was less eager to explain them to his neighbour. Garrulity, I take it, is antagonistic to the deepening of the spiritual life, and I jdoubt if the talkative age often enriches the mind. But 138 HOME TRAINING [vi none the less it is a good time to stud/ the character, since it is a time when processes are revealed which have been going on long before. At any rate these interesting speculations must not divert us from the main proposition of this part of the discussion, viz. that fifty-five is not only the outcome of the antecedent years, but gives the best evidence available as to the choice which every man must have made about his natural inclinations. Is he to humour them, and so strengthen them ? or is he to give free play to some higher principle of living which tends to " kill " these desires ? * The above brief and simple analysis of some of the fundamental needs of human nature leads us to the discernment of the sheer necessity of the ideal element in this life of struggle, and we * What does " kill " in this connexion mean ? In the recent reaction from something which may be called Puritanism, under the influence o£ a kind o£ Renaissance, voices have been heard in outspoken revolt against St. Paul's teaching, " Mortify therefore your members on the earth." It is well for us to take note that when the great Apostle used a very strong word to make plain on which side of this dilemma his sympathies lay, he was speaking as he always did, not as an anaemic monk, but as a richly endowed human being. No one can fairly charge him with being a mere " repressionist " : whatever we may think of his actual instructions about marriage, they at least deal most sympa- thetically with the fact that man's nature is animal as well as spiritual. Indeed, his whole ethical outlook was coloured by the sense that the sublime spiritual relationship in which he and vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 139 come soon to the question of what it is and how it is to be presented to the growing mind. There should be by this time no lingering doubt as to the insufficiency of the equipment to which the ideal is wanting. I must again and again warn the reader that, while sensuality is one deadly form of selfishness, it is only one, and that there are other forms quite as deadly but even more insidious because less repulsive and less decried by public opinion. They are those roughly summarized under the word pride ; and as compared with the simple, coarse, limited sin of sensuality, they are exceeding subtle, complex, and manifold. I will indicate as briefly as possible the kind of infirmity of character of which we are all bound to take heed. his converts were placed was powerful enough to transcend and absorb the antinomy between flesh and spirit : that man, instead of timidly and doubtfully weighing the possibilities of stopping short of sin, is called to fix his mind on the glory of his position as a son of the Most High, and to begin by realizing that every desire can be brought into captivity everywhere and always to the standard of Christ and to the constraining love of GOD. Even so, we should hardly be able to understand what he meant that our practice should be were it not that we have before our eyes the record and sometimes the living examples of men who have in this spirit dealt with the problem of our manhood, not as weaklings nor half-developed anchorites, but as full-blooded, rich-natured men. For what we find to be possible is the sub- servience of natural desires to a nobler set of thoughts and aims, till they are not destroyed, but caught and lifted up into a higher atmosphere where for the first time their meaning becomes plain. I40 HOME TRAINING [vi Jack's development we have traced to middle- life, and it only needs to be added that he has become a very " ordinary," fairly prosperous sort of man : he has made many friends of sorts ; has enough money to retire from business at fifty- five, lives near a golf links, and, thinking that marriage on the whole would be rather an encum- brance, has remained a bachelor. He still plays two rounds a day, devotes an hour to reading the newspaper, three hours to the consumption of food, and meantime prevents his English vocabu- lary from dwindling by commenting daily on the Government in power. As he finds pleasure in absorbing more and more of the fruits of his mother earth, so he adds to the weight of the burden which he lays upon her as he heavily tramps the links, and does less in return for the State which enables him to exist in peace and quiet ; but though this existence is not living, but dying, it lasts a long time owing to the salu- brious properties of golf as a bodily exercise and to the good open air. It is quite likely that he will go on like this till he is nearly eighty, and that when he finally dies a tablet will be put up to his memory in the parish church because he has always found it easier, on the whole, to go to church than to stay away, and at one time vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 141 there was some talk about his being a church- warden. Most of us, I trust, would say this picture is dismal enough, but many would think it over- drawn, that is to say, that the number of young men who turn out so is, after all, very small. We must not quarrel over that question ; the number is, anyhow, large enough to make any lover of his kind quake as he thinks of the future. This mean and sorry finish to the visible existence of a human soul is the outcome of a very prevalent form of home-training ; and the picture is that of a thoroughly commonplace man. Yet there must have been times during Jack's boyhood when some inkling of the higher life was felt. Facts came from time to time to his notice which seemed to hint at a divine control of things, and from the mist which encompassed him voices occasionally were heard which for a moment filled him with an awe and wonder unspeakable. But there was nothing in the ordinary routine of life to reinforce or interpret their message, and he had never got into the way of speaking about intimate subjects with anyone. So he had remained in the rut into which he had floundered, and more and more acted on the principle of humouring his inclinations except 142 HOME TRAINING [vi when he could add to his popularity by denying them. Now the character thus roughly sketched is the effect of home-training on an ordinarily simple, rather sensual nature. If the reader is satisfied that it reaches as high as we mortal men need aspire, he may, I think, conclude that the problem of character-building is solved, as far as men such as Jack are concerned ; that is to say, cause and effect are patently connected. There may be other wholly untraceable influences at work which in some cases disturb the forecast. But a common-sense parent will see that the training must have had a great deal to do with the output, and, discarding conjectural theories as to this and that, he will confine himself to matters within his ken. " I'm not going to bother about what I don't understand," he will say : " this is the kind of man I want my son to be ; and, neglecting uncertainties, this is the way to train him." There is no need to contest this opinion. Only I would beg all young parents, in whose power the son's future life still rests, to make clear to themselves that the outward aspect of the life at twenty-five may be very attractive and yet it may be drifting on irreversibly to the paralytic vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 143 Philistinism of fifty-five. Respice finem ; unless, that is, you believe that the start of the journey is more important than the goal to which it tends. If, on the other hand, you think there is some- thing wanting in this not uncommon form of prem^ature senility, then let us consider together if, and how, our methods of training may produce something a little less like a dismal decay of soul. But (again postponing our final chapter) I can fancy a rather heated rejoinder to all this talk, something to the following effect : " You school- masters are always prone to believe that common self-indulgent propensities are universal in boy- hood. They are to you the sum total of human infirmity, and where you are wrong is, not in combating them, but in supposing them to be inevitable. Why, it is absurd : my Harry is completely free from anything of the sort. He never showed the smallest inclination to sen- suality, and his pleasant manner and popularity are pretty good indications that everything has gone right with him. He has never given me a moment's anxiety ; and look how well he is getting on at Oxford.'' Parents are too courteous to use such plain speech often ; but I have a suspicion that they 144 HOME TRAINING [vi often think something very much in accordance with these words. Certainly since the revival or new birth of earnestness in character-building dating from Arnold's time, there have been many eager trainers of boys who have blundered heinously by supposing that gross sins of the flesh are all they need reckon with : that the growth of pride is not their concern. Some of them, we may even say, have fallen into danger from this sickly and one-sided view of human boyhood. But what we have now to consider is whether the parental apologia for this new type of boy, called Harry, is not just as one-sided and even more dangerous for the lad striving for a character than the schoolmaster's partial creed. On the face of it, it definitely pleads that all is well with the young man because he is popular and successful. But this is a doctrine against which experience, honestly interpreted, brings a formidable mass of evidence. We must look more closely into the matter. Unlike Jack, Harry has enjoyed as a child a wisely stimulating intellectual training. His mother was not only tond of flowers but something of a botanist, and the father, though a busy man, used to find time to read aloud to the child all sorts of delightful and '^ improving " books, and as vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 145 he possessed the too rare faculty of reading aloud really well, Harry's little mind was soon well stored with healthy anecdote : Church's " Stories from Homer " played their unfailing part ; well- chosen biographies. Lamb's " Tales from Shakes- peare," Kingsley's " Water Babies," selections from Kipling, and a score of other sound books gave something like nourishment to his inner being. Moreover, his mother, being a thoroughly cultivated woman, had taken steps to see that he learnt his Bible stories equally well ; and as Harry's memory has always been retentive, he went to school and soon established a reputation for quick and accurate work, a fondness for reading, and some readiness of observation. To games he was indifferent, but being by tempera- ment cheerful and not without a natural tact, he was among the most popular boys in the preparatory school conducted by Dennis Maxford, Esquire, at Southborough-on-Sea. But, it will be asked, what of Harry's previous moral training ? Has he been taught by expe- riences, such as that of the murdered hedge- sparrow in chap, i, to rejoice in his parents' love and wisdom even as he could not help respecting their power ? The answer is that Harry was a happily constituted child in regard 146 HOME TRAINING [vi to appetite and free from all propensity to cruelty. His early years had been so full of things of the mind that his bodily desires were easily kept in check, and by the time of school life were " tame and humble and waited on the judgment." He discovered very soon that his parents were keenly interested in him, but to say that they loved him would be too strong an expression to use. When they were not teaching him, they seemed to be thinking of other things. His father was an authority on some of the problems connected with labour and capital, and his mother, besides being socially a success, spent much time in the garden, but was able to find room in her life for reading and intellectual talk — often about educa- tional theories — by keeping rather aloof from her neighbours, who were much like other people, she used to say, and inviting down smart talkers of various interests for her week-ends. Harry was an only son and his younger sister was not much of a companion for him, though of sweet disposition and quite free from display, but too little given to logical thought or analysis to care much for " subjects " such as her belongings loved and not a very ready talker. She was of the " ministering angel " type, her father used to say, with the slightest soupgon of scorn in his VI] TYPES OF FAILURE 147 tone, and though the brother and sister never quarrelled, he formed the idea early in life that for the most part women v^ere dull creatures ; indeed, this v^as the adjective freely applied by both his parents to their neighbours with little discrimination — the one exception being Mr. Caelebs, who lived alone three miles away, a conchologist, but with an attractive bizarrerie of manner and eccentric humour which made him quite worth asking to an occasional dinner. He was a retired Cambridge don. Harry's parents, meantime, were civil to the vicar and somewhat frigid to his wife. His mother attended church on Sunday mornings, because she had come across cases where the banishing of religion from the home life had had disastrous effect on the chil- dren, and she was too much of an educationist not to see that morals without a religious basis were insecurely planted, though in the main she trusted to general healthy influences. The father was a parcus deorum cultor et infrequens^ being generally too busy, and unable to repress his dislike of the ordinary sermon. There were no family prayers. On going to school, Harry found himself in the company of many boys who in some ways were like his neighbours at home. Of course, 148 HOME TRAINING [vi till he was about sixteen he was not clearly con- scious of this likeness, and had his critical faculty not been renewed every time he went home and by the acid remarks of his father on some reported incidents of school life, it is possible that he might have drifted into doing as others did — that is to say, taking his schoolfellows simply as he found them, settling that some were " asses," some few quite impossible, and a good many " decent: chaps " worth knowing. But Harry was unlike the common run of boy in that he came early to prefer subjects of the mind to games, as indeed his father had often hoped he would. At Mr. Maxford's, he had been a collector of butterflies and had pursued the winged creatures in the holidays, sticking pins into their spangled thoraces with the same avidity as Arthur Heaviside potted rabbits on a neighbouring farm ; and his mother encouraged him to believe that he had chosen the better part. Thus when at school the leading boys in the house talked earnestly of winning the house football cup, Harry was mildly bored. Now and again, it is true, he felt some- thing akin to an uprush of emotion in the fray itself, but found on going home that his mother very soon led the talk on to other subjects, as she had been convinced by a pungent article in vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 149 the " Educational Forecast " that athleticism was absurdly overdone in schools, and besides, John Trevor, the captain of the house-team, was not a really well-bred young fellow : you could tell he came from somewhere near Sheffield and cared nothing about biology, in which Harry was making good progress. So things went on till Harry went on to Oxford and gained a first-class in science without being at all an ignoramus in literature. He got a post au lecturer in one of the colleges after travelling with a scholarship for research to the Canary Islands, and not long after married a young lady who was making a name as a writer of " problem novels." The two lived a quiet life on the Banbury Road, confining themselves to a very select circle of friends, lost in amazement how some of them seemed happy in the company of quite ordinary people. Harry and his wife enjoyed, though less and less after forty years of age, short runs to the Continental picture galleries ; but the difficulty was the life in hotels, as they were expected apparently to talk with their neighbours at table d'hote, and this was really going too far. In religious matters Harry became an eclectic. Theism seemed to him a creed quite possibly true, and he refrained from making any overt ISO HOME TRAINING [vi attacks on religion generally, though how anyone could " find peace " in a set of propositions obviously incapable of proof was more than he could conceive. One son was born of this marriage — a healthy, not to say loutish boy, who hated science except in what concerned aviation ; and after his parents had done their utmost to make him less commonplace, he baffled all their hopes by developing into a coarse, rather extrava- gant youth, who refused to go into any profession and seemed likely to become a victim of drink. Harry grew more and more embittered about it all, and died of disgust at sixty, after publishing two rather considerable books on sub-tropical Crustacea. So concluded a life full, for a time, of a certain thankfulness, viz. that he, the owner, was not as other boys are, lumpish, carnal, empty-pated. But it was noticeable that after about thirty- eight years of age this bland self-satisfaction seemed to evaporate in presence of domestic disappointment and decline of health. Harry was quite unprepared to find his general keenness suffer so heavy a rebuff. His few friends lived away or died. He could not fill their places, for other people were as dull as ever, indeed bored him all the more as they grew more talkative ; and golf, his one recreation, began to lose its vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 151 mysterious charm as progress seemed to be denied him. Yet he lived on, if living it can be called, though his friends remarked that after forty the lines of bitterness and gloom in his face per- ceptibly deepened, and those who knew him best were fain to admit that the story was tragic and the life barren and unhappy. The difference between Jack and Harry is important. Jack is the type of the ordinary sensual man whose proclivities have been to a large extent thwarted in early life by public opinion and coercion at home. Harry is of the cold, anaemic type for whom intellectuality has bred a temper of scorn and criticism of others. This temper blossomed late, and so failed to draw on itself the animadversion either of parents or schoolmasters, since about it, in its early stage at any rate, there was nothing disgusting, nothing that led to conflict with school rules ; but at the end there were one or two observers who sadly remembered that in the verdict pronounced on man by Christ, as far as we can tell from the records preserved, the scornful type is treated with far more severity than those whose bodily appetites have them in thrall, notwithstanding that to us the latter seem more startling and arresting as warnings. 152 HOME TRAINING [vi Yet again. One of the men who had had some influence upon Jack at one time was Will Church, the son of a well-known prebendary in a northern manufacturing town. Will had in his boyhood the benefit of his father's example, that of a busy, zealous parson, a noted preacher and pamphleteer of vigorous health, who en- joyed his work but was extremely sensitive to criticism, especially if he was accused of being confused or inconsistent in his teaching. This infirmity, if such it can be called, led him to devote time to theological and other disputation ; indeed, he found it necessary to put away more and more of his ordinary work for it. Now Will grew up a keen Churchman, imbibing his father's moderately high opinions, and without ostentation and parade he devoted the time he could spare from his profession, that of architect, to supporting church work in the neighbourhood. He had never been troubled by religious doubts, and his reputa- tion for integrity was unblemished ; but it was remarkable by the time he was thirty, how acrid were many of the criticisms of his actions on the part of quite good people. The truth is, he trod on people's toes, and may be said not only to have trodden but to have vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 153 remained standing on them, because he had an ugly way of letting Tom, Dick, and Johnnie know when and where he disagreed with them. He was incessantly absorbed in trying to make other people good, but good in his own way, ready to adopt the same view of life and its manifold issues, ready to cast their deeper con- victions into the same form of words and to practise the same traditional methods of carrying on converse with the Unseen. Filling thus his day with absorbing occupa- tion, and being something of a pachyderm. Will never laid hold of the meaning of the great warnings about the mote and the beam, or about those who compassed sea and land to make one proselyte, nor of the positive precept that we are to commend our gospel to our fellow men. He somehow presented it as an intrusive, rasping thing, provocative of barren strife in the cathedral town where he lived ; and so praiseworthy all the time was his zeal that he left himself no time to read or think if he were what he professed to be, " a witness to Christ," and so ended his days almost fit to be a subject for the portrait gallery of a modern Dickens — cranky, harsh, uningratiating, unloving, and unloved : a man whose arrival 154 HOME TRAINING [vi at one of Mrs. Banister's tea-parties was like a puff of March east wind accompanied by banging of doors and clattering of crocks on every side, such as drew down the corners of every mouth and enveloped men's minds closer than ever in their reserve. Small wonder was it that the healthy, solid Britons in the manufacturing portion of the town said openly that they found more Christian charity in the hunting- field than in the cathedral close or the church itself, and quietly ignored Will and all his works, till at last they could not have told you whether they were agnostics or believers. And so we might go on studying failures. But enough. We have sufficient material to form a judgment on the pressing question whether these melancholy outcomes of ordinary human low- mindedness or perverted aims are directly derived from the home training or not. If there is reason to believe that the home training in the early years has had a good deal to do with the result, then in these days, when English men and women are gathering together their forces to war against the power of evil and the stealthy spread of corruption, when from every section of society there goes up a cry for more character, more grit. vi] TYPES OF FAILURE 155 more disciplined lives, more faith, hope and love, how urgent does the question become ! There is a general yearning for reality in all these matters among all those whose souls are not starved beyond renewal by the pursuit of material goods. That is to say, men dimly conceive how boundless is the promise of a coming uplift if only in any community could be shown forth the power of real unselfishness, true single-mindedness, trans- parent charity born of the feeling for the inherent worth and dignity of every human soul. With growing insistence all earnest people are giving themselves to this lofty quest. If, then, society needs, with such an urgent need, qualities of this sort for its quickening, what can we say as to their source, and the methods of drawing them forth and of fostering them into power ? VII : WHERE IS THE SOURCE OF VIRTUE ? TT is always possible to take the view of human goodness that it is wholly mysterious in its origin and its growth, a gift from GOD which comes to us independent of any law of sequence, and operates to the benefit of society in ways which cannot be traced or foreseen. Among those who so estimate it will be many who believe that such a feeling is simply reverence for a wonderful and beautiful thing ; and further they infer that any inquiry into law in such a thing as goodness, e.g. to raise the question how far its appearance on earth is the result of human endeavour, forethought, watchfulness, concentra- tion, betokens a profane and prying spirit ; and that the only right course of action is to pray for the gift in our children and make the utmost of it when it has been given. Such a view was very common before 1870, and there is much in it which would appeal to anyone who had given attention to the things of the Spirit in man, and more particularly had 156 VII] WHERE IS THE SOURCE OF VIRTUE ? 157 thought upon the beginnings of lovable and excellent characters wherever they have come into being. But it was corrected, rather violently perhaps, hy the influence of the Scientific move- ment in the last half of last century, and by the deep longing for reality and truth and for social betterment which has characterized the last thirty or forty years. Science has extended its sway so victoriously over human life that we are now indisposed to believe that anything impor- tant necessarily lies beyond the reach of man's discernment, or is outside the traceable working of cause and effect. Of course this view has itself been corrected by the vigorous onslaught on materialism which has brought to light the tenuity and feebleness of man's grasp of law in spiritual things. We have come to see that unless Science recognizes the limits of her own area she stultifies herself by asserting claims fatal to her own basal assumptions. None the less, thoughtful folk are unable to leave the origin and history of fine characters unscanned and un- explored. However much we may feel that it is holy ground, the question how such characters are produced and fostered is too vitally bound up with the saving of society itself to be left on one side, even though it is not indolence but awe 158 HOME TRAINING [vii which might prompt us to refrain from looking into the Ark. In what follows it is assumed that along with a due recognition of the mysteriousness of all good- ness we know enough about it to lay down some important principles. They are these : {a) That at the bottom of all the phenomena of character-decay and failure of promise lies the master-vice of egoism, as a principle warring against loyalty to the ideal or the serving of GOD, This is only putting into slightly different words Christ's great axiom, " Ye cannot serve GOD and Mammon " : for I hold that Mammon means egoism. Q?) That if we could see into the secrets of every heart we should learn that every human life is a drama of infinite, thrilling interest, since in it is enacted the struggle between the two allegiances, GOD or self. (c) That though much is hidden from us, it is possible to discern that the ultimate issue of this antagonism is determined in a vast majority of cases by something that takes place in childhood. {d) That this is a self-committal either to GOD or self : to the latter when things go wrong ; but in cases where things ultimately go right the choice is sometimes reversed by later experiences. vii] WHERE IS THE SOURCE OF VIRTUE ? 159 (e) That the good effect of such later experi- ences is far more inexplicable than the bad effect of a faulty training in childhood : in other words, the effect of home-training is so far certain that it is foolish to put any trust in any other influence such as school life or the personal influence of some teacher or friend after school life is over : for if a human life begins in egoism, a conversion wears the aspect of a special divine interposition on which we have no right to reckon. (/) Therefore that if we are in earnest about the training of the lives we have brought into the world we shall give the best of our efforts and attention to the planting, firmly and deeply, the sense of the unseen ideal in the earliest years, as the best and indeed the only antidote to various forms of egoism on which we can securely rely. {g) That the method of so doing is for parents to exhibit continually to the child a life devoted not to self but to the service of GOD (which inevitably takes the form of labouring to increase the happiness of our fellow men), combined with such teaching as shall explain the motive of such a life and its hope. Doubt, I imagine, is more likely to settle at once upon the fifth {e) of these propositions i6o HOME TRAINING [vii than on any other. That is to say, in a large number of cases in which there is a divergence from these lines on the part of parents who are sincerely anxious to attain the same good, as that which is here sketched out, the reason is that they have formed a less exalted estimate of the power of the parental guidance than is here assumed. I trust, however, to the common sense of my readers in this matter, so as to hope that con- troversy on the particular question may be avoided. There need be no over-readiness on the part of the " parental school," if we may be so called, to ignore other influences. We recog- nize, for instance, the great value of the boarding- school as a fosterer of the seed sown at home, and the giver of a certain equipment for the daily life of citizenship which is almost indispensable and on any showing most valuable. But the main question is whether this or any other influence outside the home is to be depended on for the greatest results with as much good reason as that of the parental life lived in presence of the child day by day : and I assert first that the best evidence to hand is that afforded by the study of boys' development at the age when the deeper things of character begin to disclose themselves vii] WHERE IS THE SOURCE OF VIRTUE ? i6i in the face of gathering trials ; that is from fourteen to twenty-two years of age. Secondly, that by such study the primeval view of the whole matter is emphatically and undeniably confirmed : viz. that the most effective trainer of the child is his parent ; and that if for any reason whatever we cause a huge number of people to trust to other trainers than the parents, or to other surroundings than those of the home, or to a later time of life than early childhood, we are forsaking the method taught to us by nature {i,e. science), by revelation, and by the agreement of the deepest instincts of mankind, and have no warrant for believing that we are on the way to securing the end on which our hopes are set, viz. that our children shall grow into unselfish men. Thirdly, that this evidence is drawn not only from the study of the failures of human de- velopment, shown by the premature withering up of bright hopes, by cynicism in middle life, by apathy or despair, but by the contemplation of one of the very fairest of all the beautiful growths which our Creator's bounty allows us to witness. I mean the growth in strength, in the power of unselfish choice, of quiet single-minded- ness, which is to be discerned in varying degrees L i62 HOME TRAINING [vii among the best-favoured of English boys at an age which still reveals in no uncertain colours the working of the spirit of home-life : the responsible ratifying of that early start on the upward narrow path of devotion to the unseen ideal to which the child was guided by his parents. I cannot say which is the more eloquent witness to the power of the home, the gradual irreversible set- back as years go on of characters which begin their history in all the glory of a bounteous endowment, in fresh gladsomeness, alertness of brain and bodily grace ; or the wonder of the Christian interpretation of life working in the h^concealed depths and winning that lasting conquest over common desires, that unassuming freedom from convention and thoughtless talk which we all long for in our children and heed- lessly pervert and spoil. I say that it is not only the facts of nature, the a priori reasoning on the laws of mental growth and the rudiments of psychology which guide us to our conclusion, but the plain teaching of experience, guided by which we can trace the outcome either in its splendour or its pitifulness to the training of the early years. But the question will be asked again : " Are you sure of your evidence ? Granted much of vii] WHERE IS THE SOURCE OF VIRTUE ? 163 what has been said as to the connexion between early defective teaching and the failures of later life, yet surely there are a good many cases of men turning out satisfactorily whose parents have been quite commonplace, not to say convention- ally selfish and overborne by unthinking public opinion. It is this fact which prevents married men and women from being so deeply stirred in this matter of home-training as you would have them be." In answer to this contention I would point out that we are concerned here not with perfect theory but with practice. Doubtless if it were possible in such a matter to evolve a formula or two which would fit all the facts, it might be that the need for careful observation and thought would disappear ; but if it did, the practice based on the formula would soon lose all its vitality. We arc engaged in a quest which is far too great to admit of formulas. Anything of the nature of a law to do with character must be difficult to understand and, as far as we can tell, impossible to fix with precision ; but that is not the same thing as to affirm that we are without guidance, or that when there is a great and increasing desire for men of strength and uprightness we can safely ignore the light that is given to us. The i64 HOME TRAINING [vii parenthood of English people is beset by subtle dangers. The first is utter want of thought. Men and women marry ; children are born : and it seems to be taken for granted that the purely conventional way of going on, the conven- tional reticence about deep things or the occasional talk about them, dissociated from moral training, the conventional coldness towards the outward acknowledgment of the divine presence in the daily home-life, the conventional mixing of profession towards GOD with nervous anxiety about public opinion and material goods, will somehow do. But we do not seriously put before ourselves what must be the influence of such a home-life viewed as a child must view it, interpreted as a child must interpret it ; and how far that influence, if satisfactory for a few years, will persist till the days when the silver cord is broken and the grass- hopper becomes a burden. And yet at the present day there is more heed given to these matters than there was : and a fair number of people among the educated classes are trying to see a little further into the mystery of character-growth than their fathers did. The result sometimes is that, baffled by the complexity of the problem, they waste their strength on discussion ; on airy questionings of principles which they cannot vii] WHERE IS THE SOURCE OF VIRTUE ? 165 understand except by vigorously practising them. To these the indubitable truth that some of the phenomena of the growth of goodness in the young seem to be independent of the early training is a sufficient warrant for scepticism as to there being any law in the matter at all. They talk about it perhaps, and read a little and join conferences : but all the time the years are going by, and the question with which their sons are occupied is being silently settled in the wrong way. " Is life a stage for the gratification of desires or for something higher ? " And it is being settled by an unremitting scrutiny of the parents' life, and by a continuous imbibing of the principles and motives which appear to be at work. For we must remember that what the parents' deepest motives may be is not the question : the question is what motives the child can discern. Now it is by one of the educated and perhaps academic class that we may suppose the question about evidence has been put. But it is not a question which ought to detain us ; the problem before us is too urgent, and time fleets by too quickly. I say that even if we grant a certain amount of untraceable result in a minority of cases, the evidence that character is more certainly i66 HOME TRAINING [vii formed by the influence of home-life in the early years is abundantly sufficient for our needs. Further, that where the resiilts are most dis- appointing and incomplete they have generally been the outcome of a training which has pre- sented a decorous conformity to public opinion as the summum bonum of conduct. Where, on the other hand, the issue has been a character marked by strength and simplicity and the faculty of growth through many long years, that issue is due to a home atmosphere in which daily obedi- ence to the unseen ideal has been steadily mani- fested by the father and mother. In other words, I maintain that both the a ^nmand the a posteriori reasons for believing that the home-training is by far the most potent of the determining influences are amply strong enough to settle the practical principle for all sensible people who are in earnest about the kind of man they wish their son to be. I will next take the proposition named {a) above, as requiring a word of explanation. The reason why it is important to use the word egoism is that it covers the two kinds of aberration from virtue to one of which all of us are prone and some apparently to both : the one kind is broadly denoted by Sensuality, the other by Pride, (t imagine that when the Psalmist spoke of the people with a " proud look and a high stomach " v!i] WHERE IS THE SOURCE OF VIRTUE ? 167 he was thinking of both.) For all parents who are guided chiefly by public opinion it is a tempta- tion to suppose that if they somehow steer their offspring through the shoals of sensuality there is no reason to trouble themselves about the deep currents of Pride : because if the vessel is dashed upon the first it makes a scandal ; if it is caught by the second no one seems to notice what is going on. In other words, a visibly sensual man is buffeted by society and his parents pitied or blamed : the proud man is unmolested. Yet in the teaching of Christ there is no doubt which of the two declinations from good is treated as the more deadly: and perhaps for this reason, that if a man errs from pride and is left unmolested by public opinion, he is less likely to reform than a poor fellow who is treated as a pariah and con- stantly reminded of his disastrous choice. More- over, the sense of shame which is the essential preliminary to repentance is impossible to a proud person, who is always inclined to congratu- late himself on his character and actions, per- ceiving meantime less and less of their quality and motive. We now come to consider in its more positive aspect the central principle of home-training which has been hinted at more than once in previous chapters. VIII : TRAINING IN SINGLE- MINDEDNESS ^TPHE problem of healthily developing the growing character of a human child has hitherto been stated roughly, and as some would think ignorantly, as if it were a matter of getting the child to make a right choice, viz., between gratifying natural inclinations and snubbing them at the dictates of a higher law. In case, however, some philosophic person may chance to read the present chapter, it seems advisable to state with greater precision wherein lies the root infirmity of all human beings ; because it may be the case that such a statement of the problem will affect the way we conceive of the solution. In the volume entitled " Foundations," Mr. Temple thus states the mystery and central paradox of sin. He is discussing it in relation to the Atonement and has just given St. Augustine's view, which differed from that of the great Eastern theologians in being far more concerned with man's will and with the moral side of our relation to GOD. " The moral struggle itself shows that i68 viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 169 (our will) is a faculty to be slowly built up out of numberless conflicting impulses. To speak of the opposition of the Will and the desires is, strictly speaking, nonsense, though it may be provisionally useful. When Augustine prayed ' Give me chastity, but not yet,' he really wanted to be pure, and he also really wanted to indulge a little longer ; and it was the same he who wanted both. To say to such a man that he must strengthen his will is mockery ; his will is just himself, and how shall a man strengthen himself except by coming deliberately, when the good desire is uppermost, under some external influence ? . . . The self which determines is the same as the self that is to be determined ; the self which, according to Pelagius, is to make me good is the bad self that needs to be made good. We can be good if we altogether will to be made good ; for that act of will is itself the being good. But the whole difficulty is that we only will in part to be good ; we do not altogether will it. The disease is in the will — not in some part of ourselves other than the will which the will can control. I can only be brought to will what now I do not will by some external power — and this Augustine calls Good. It is a free gift, for ex hyfothesi I cannot deserve it ; it is just because 170 HOME TRAINING [viii and in so far as I am sinful and have no merit that I need it. It is the free gift of GOD in Christ." Now perhaps to some this statement of the problem may seem less intelligible than that given above (ch. i). If so it will be, I fancy, because it is deeper and nearer to the truth. But the points to be noticed are these : (i) It brings out the terrifying fact that a wrong choice means a diseased will ; and a diseased will means a diseased self. (2) The point at which the main difficulty begins is the same in the two statements : in the one it is contained in the idea that the child may obey a higher law ; in the other in the words " under some external influence." We may pause for a moment to notice that, however true this last expression may be, it touches on a mystery which we can only in part and by experience begin to understand. Suppose we conceive of some one suffering from physical weakness, it is certain that no " external power " can do more than help the vital force in the body to act, and liberate the strength which is there all the time but is in some way impeded. Now suppose the weakness is spiritual, what we call weakness of will, but which Mr. Temple would viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 171 call a diseased self, is the law the same ? Can any external influence add to the strength, or cleanse the spiritual being, or renew the foun- tains of spiritual life, or whatever other metaphor we prefer to use ? This question must be faced, and as parents of children we ought to have a fairly clear idea of the answer to it. First, as to the expression '' a diseased self " : there will, of course, be umbrage taken at it not only by those whose experience of life has led them to believe that as to themselves it is a gross and offensive exaggeration, but by those who sincerely hold that in regard to such a human being as their own child of eight years it is plainly incredible. The objections of some would stop short at this point. Others would extend them, and include, among beings to whom the words cannot apply, other people's children. It is worth noting that the excluded persons would generally be young children, or those rare people who retain the childlikeness far on into adult life. But the objection, however sensible and indeed attractive it may sound, comes to very little when we take in the significance of the metaphor of disease. The word has been defined as follows : " All disease is life out of place," and in the spiritual sphere, when the word is understood, 172 HOME TRAINING [viii it loses its repulsiveness and ceases to express what is commonly felt to be abnormal and loath- some. It merely expresses the tendency in human beings to choose the wrong thing, knowing it to be wrong. This is not primarily a description of something dead and mouldering and foul with the foulness of corruption, but of a wrong kind of activity which, so far from being loathsome, often is in a way attractive. For instance, it is quite possible for a young man, knowing that deep solicitude about other people's concerns, their joys and their trials, is of the essence of good, to choose deliberately, and almost putting a constraint upon himself, such a narrowing of his own sympathies and interests as leads inevitably to the uttermost selfishness before the end comes. And yet such a man may be for a long time quite attractive. He is free from a sort of angularity which is often painfully observable in good folk who are striving, and successfully striving, to become less selfish as they grow older : he is no Pharisee as the word is ordinarily understood ; that is, you know when he comes into the room that he will not begin by finding fault with persons or things. But it may be the case that with his eyes open he is engaged in gradually starving his higher instincts and in becoming the kind of man viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 173 to whom cruelty of a refined sort is no longer objectionable. If this be true — and who can deny it ? — we are not really disputing about the facts but only interpreting them differently. The expression " diseased " cannot be repudiated so long as it is allowed that disease can exist in an organism very fair to outward view ; and this no one doubts. We are now in a position to answer the question raised by Mr. Temple's phrase about an " external influence " being the only hope for a diseased self. As in a man's physical life there is no evidence that any treatment can add to his bodily strength but only liberate what is naturally inborn, are we to conclude that spiritual life lives only on its inborn vitality ; or is there hope of strength taking the place of weakness, humility growing instead of pride, steadfastness instead of indecision, single- mindedness instead of double-mindedness, purity instead of concupiscence, and so on ? If there is no hope, then there is no educational problem for parents to perpend. If there is, then there is one problem which puts all others into the shade, viz. how to subject the child to the influences which will bring about this most blessed result. As I am addressing professing Christians, there 174 HOME TRAINING [viii can be no hesitation about the answer. Our belief in the Incarnation of the Son of GOD and the Redemption of the world makes it impossible for us to hold that any form of spiritual infirmity- is incurable if it is taken in time. The difference between the spiritual and physical spheres is quite distinct, no matter how dim the line of demar- cation may be, because, whereas in the one what we call a cure is merely a restoration to the healthy from the abnormal or unhealthy state, in the spiritual sphere something often takes place which has all the aspect of a new creation, an addition of vital power from outside, not merely a libera- tion of forces already within. Even for those who do not see eye to eye with Christians in the matter of the Incarnation, there is always a chance that they may admit this wonder if they contemplate the same facts. By the time the Fourth Gospel was written some observers in Palestine certainly agreed with the statement reported as made by Christ, that " except a man be born again he cannot see the Kingdom of GOD." But the familiarity of the words blinds us to the truly astonishing statement itself. The deepest thinker in the country either reported what the Saviour said or summed up in these words what he saw going on around him, namely viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 175 spiritual lives re-created^ that is, not merely restored to their normal level like a sick man after a fever, but renewed, the recipients of a nev^ endowment of vitality. What was undoubtedly going on then has been going on since. Countless witnesses testify to the marvel as having taken place both in themselves and others. There are therefore three remarkable differences between the physical and the spiritual lives of men. (i) There is evidence of the physical condition normally beginning in health, but of the spiritual condition always beginning in disease. If this latter statement is doubted I would ask why in all cases childhood requires discipline — not guidance only, as a nurse shows a child what to eat and how to chew, &c., but a process whereby natural tendencies are reversed, or rather domi- nated by the mind and spirit. Physical training is nearly always nearer to a following of nature than intellectual training, and intellectual training is far oftener according to natural inclination than spiritual and moral training, which practically never is. (2) As already explained, curative processes in bodily matters restore the health to what it ought always to be, or they liberate a certain 176 HOME TRAINING [viii portion of the organism so that it can act unim- peded ; but in the spiritual life what happens can only be described as a " new birth," and the Gospel message is that every human being must undergo it or perish. This is the truth which parents are called upon to grasp when a new life is born. (3) The physical life is merely a resisting for a time of the forces of disintegration. For a few years, growth has the appearance of a taking in of new strength, but it is in reality only the evolution or unrolling of vitality already in the organism, and it soon begins to decay. But the spiritual vitality of the newly quickened man is immune from the law of decay, which reigns supreme over other forms of life. It waxes stronger as the years run out their course. Now I have no hesitation in appealing to all parents who profess Christianity to consider nost carefully if they are not constrained to this view of human nature by the principles which they profess. Others who reject the principles I would ask if they do not think the view corro- borated by observable facts in the life around them. All who think it is in the main truly stated are bound to appreciate to some extent the thrilling nature of the drama which opens when viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 177 a child is born. What is at stake is simply Salvation ; and unless we are mad there can be no doubt about the first question in life for every parent is this : " How can I learn to behave towards this child of mine so as to place him under the saving influences at work in the world ?" This I will try to answer. Let us notice first that the whole theory of the issues lying before each human being depends on the world being viewed as a redeemed place. We may admit that the great remedy is harder to understand than the symptoms of the disease ; but none the less, if facts point to there being a remedy, it is lunacy not to do all we can to learn what it is and to apply it. Doubtless to many it is supremely difficult to view this world in any such hopeful light. They come to admit that each human life is a drama which may end in a tragedy inconceivably piteous. But they do not see that every life may end in a glory which no mind can picture or tongue describe. Both are difficult because " the things that are seen " are curiously deceptive and suggest the very opposite of the truth ; but we can trace the first, as I have already attempted to do in one or two typical cases, far more precisely than the second. That is to say, you can follow M 1 78 HOME TRAINING [viii the degradation of Macbeth, or Tito, or King Saul with a better understanding than the story of those who " go from strength to strength " ; and yet it is better for our soul's health that we should learn the secret of the latter than of the former. It is well, at least so I think, to shake ourselves clear of the pathological, and study with awe and delight the divine working in men, women, and boys which lifts them out of egoism, its sloth or its harsh criticism or its drab acquies- cence in the humdrum things, into a growth and development too wonderful to analyse or even to imagine. For in reality there is no excuse at the present day for a laissez aller temper in home training. The last fifty years have produced plenty of evidence to startle all who are not of the incurably contented sort. I would add the following from a long experience of schoolboys. Take a boarding-house in a big school full of the sons of the successful. It is evident to the housemaster that his boys are the recipients of a great wealth of affection — ordinary, natural affection — from their parents. They have come to him from homes where this love is a visible patent fact of life. Probably in most cases it has not been blended with any unusual amount of viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 179 wisdom, but still the ordinary precautions have been taken against certain manifestations of egoism such as move any respectable adult to fear or disgust, and the precautions have suc- ceeded : by fourteen the child is apparently obedient, nice-mannered, keen to do right, and begins to learn the useful qualities which allow him to get on well with his contemporaries. The house, say, of forty boys is full of such, and as long as unceasing vigilance, insight, and tact are exercised by the housemaster, working through his eldest boys, things go quietly. But supposing the said housemaster becomes detached from his work in life, either by the enthralment of ease or of domestic anxieties or even by literary or scientific preoccupation ? The result is not flaccidity or stagnation in the youthful society but pandemonium. Egoism asserts itself triumphantly against unity, and those who are not coarsely vicious are cruel and quarrelsome. A few choice spirits keep apart in helpless dismay at the scene of human wreckage. This state of things reveals itself within a year, brought about not by blundering or injustice but simply by neglect. It is fatuous to wring the hands over this tendency among the young, it is perilous to study i8o HOME TRAINING [viii closely its workings : our duty is to learn from it, and I assert that the inference to be drawn is that there is a widespread, ever-active disease of self spread among the young as elsewhere. We may note its symptoms because dissimulation is but feebly practised in a public school. But it must be remembered that, startling though this evidence is, it only reveals a lesser portion of what is going on. Collapse among boys is often taken to mean the development of coarseness, the reappearance of the barbaric vices, lust and cruelty ; but more fatal than these is the steady, unnoticed, unre- buked growth of a comparatively decorous selfish- ness, that is, the effect on a self-regarding character of the sight of unabashed lawlessness in others. ''If they indulge themselves in their way, why not I in mine ? " In other words, in the sphere of the visible we can check to some extent the conquests of egoism when it is left alone ; we shall be held accountable for a peculiar form of stupidity if we do not infer from it what is going on — for the present — unseen. Such is the challenge to parents, stated in its harshest form. Its gravity, however, cannot be fairly understood unless we take into our reckoning the other side of the picture. If neglect added to a wrong interpretation of life given in viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS i8i childhood brings about a widespread havoc, what happens when things go well ? Is there no evidence to be gained from growth of goodness ? We may thankfully say there is, and we may profitably use it for our guidance if we bear in mind always that, whereas evil among the young is fairly open to view, what we call goodness may be nothing more than a specious conformity to certain requirements, and that when these require- ments cease, the old egoistic Adam asserts himself in his primeval strength. But where this does not occur, and where the development goes forward in a normal fashion, what are the symp- toms useful to note ? We have given much attention to common forms of aberration. Let us now contemplate the walking in the narrow way that leadeth to life ? It will be remembered that one of the main influences before which weak characters succumb is a thoughtless public opinion which at school is more thoughtless, of course, but also more insistent than among adults. What is the policy of the best boys towards this formidable fact ? Do they palter with it or resist it ? truckle to it or flout it with scorn ? In the very best cases they conform to what is harmless without thinking, just as they eat and 1 82 HOME TRAINING [viii drink because it is necessary, and not for the sake of personal satisfaction. Probably it is impos- sible for any boy who is not an athletic Titan to flout convention openly and derisively ; and even if he be such he will lose incalculably in public favour. But after all, needless eccentricity is a silly thing ; it strews numerous obstacles in the path, but sows no seed. A boy of strong, inde- pendent character, and more than that, simple- hearted, will not trouble his head about how far public opinion is wise or erratic. He selects with a fine heedlessness what is wholesome or at least innocent to follow, and similarly he turns his back on what is corrupt or merely childish : unconcerned about himself, he probably conforms so far as to avoid collision, just as some adults not wholly foolish wear garments like tall hats which are not ideal, because to forgo them would mean a loss of peace not balanced by any certain gain ; and if they are the best sort of people they do this unthinkingly, because there are other matters of more obvious importance.* * Archbishop Temple when Bishop of London is reported to have gone into a hatter's to buy a new episcopal hat : not a day too soon. Being short-sighted, he mistook a dandified Belgravian, who was standing bareheaded near the counter, for a shopman. Says the Bishop : " Have you got a hat like this ? " Belgravian : *' No, by Jove, and if I had I wouldn't wear it." viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 183 Meantime, if evil comes directly across his path, the sound-minded schoolboy does not pause to examine it or dally with it, but kicks it cheer- fully to one side as something alien to his nature about which he knows and cares nothing except that it is repellent. If he is one of those on whom the gods have lavished their very finest gift, he will naturally and easily adopt this clean and knightly attitude towards all forms of egoism, even if they are not in the least revolting but rather attractive than not. Such a character is not that of a crusader against evil, but, what is better and decidedly more lovable, it is that of one who healthily and objectively ensues what is good. Now it is of the utmost importance for us parents to recognize that, while this sort of character is captivating, it is also very rare ; and also that, even if it persists through childhood, it often gets warped in adolescence ; and again, if it survives adolescence it has to face the deadly perils of self-contentment in middle life and cynicism in early old age. The enormous majority of young people require that a principle of good within them be deeply and firmly planted, on which they can face the baffling problems of right and wrong; not as our young knights, in a gay i84 HOME TRAINING [viii masterfulness, and unconsciously choosing the best without blunder, but through trial and sometimes tribulation, having learnt by experience that there is a path of duty independent of public opinion, which is also a path of happiness ; and the gradual growth into this knowledge cannot and must not be left to chance. The question, then, that confronts us is, briefly, thus : Why is it that in scores of cases the disease in the self seems to be pretty adequately dealt with for a certain number of years from infancy, but reasserts itself in adolescence or later ? In other words, what is the healthy influence which operates for a time but apparently ceases just when it seems to be most needed ? There can be no doubt about the answer. As already hinted, there are many of us sensible enough to bestow on our young children a training which consists of a blending of law and love and which never fails to work its effect in disciplining the little mind towards what we call virtuous habits and self-control, but at the same time we are foolish enough to persuade ourselves that that is all that is required or, anyhow, to imagine that the subsequent stages may be left to the random influences of school-life, social opinion, professional claims, and so on. Yet it is patently obvious that viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 185 during the years when real progress is being made against the disease of wrong choice, it is made because the parental control is exercised in a peculiarly effective manner in the right direction, through a blend of irresistible power and the tenderest affection ; but that later this control rather rapidly is withdrawn and nothing definite enough for so young and fluid a thing as the mind of a boy of fourteen is put in its place. Or in cases where the parents remain a force up to nineteen or twenty, it very often happens that the youth silently withdraws himself from their intellectual and spiritual guidance, begins to think for himself, and finds that he has got hold of nothing stable except the advisability of con- forming to public opinion or of gaining cheap applause for eccentricity by defying it. Broadly speaking, this very common result comes from the parents keeping from the boy all real knowledge of their own good principles, and, as already described, substituting for them the shoddy principles of conventionalism. How this is to be avoided is the practical question before us. Something, or rather everything, in the sur- roundings of childhood must present the idea of the Presence of GOD, as vitally affecting all conduct, all choice, all interpretation of life's 1 86 HOME TRAINING [viii problems. Against this canon you have the obstacle of our infirmities, shyness and ignorance, and the obstacle planted in our way by nature, viz. the fact that if this is unwisely done we turn our children into prigs. The last monosyllable exercises an incalculable influence on English education. The little word denotes not only a superficial veneer of folly, pretence and conceit, but a disposition to take the Name of GOD in vain by using it to cover human selfishness. A prig is an " actor " or hypocrite who has not acquired the art of con- cealing what he is doing : he is a dissembler found out ; and though his selfishness may be only slight, supposing even that he has yearnings after the high and wholesome, if he expresses them by using phrases far too sublime for his meaning, he lapses at once into priggishness, anyhow as far as his speech is concerned. And this habit somehow rubs our countrymen the wrong way more decidedly than other infirmities which may be more dangerous. It looks as if the fear of its being implanted in young boys had induced many fathers to keep total silence as to all that is best within themselves. They dread the premature use of the sacred Name ; but most unfortunately, acting on that dread, they viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 187 suppress it so completely that its mighty and august meaning is never taken in by the child at all ; and later on, the teaching that he receives assumes the knowledge which has never been imparted, and the interpretation of life, into which the little boy is insensibly led, is funda- mentally confused. But the danger is woefully exaggerated. The timid apprehension of it in reality means that we have no trust in Truth itself, having committed ourselves so feebly to its guidance. Once weigh well the immortal utterance " The Truth shall make you free," and we must feel some shame at our mistrust. Why should we be so nervous of the effect of the only thing more beautiful than a human child, that is, the message we have received from heaven ? Freedom ! Let us picture the evangelist penning that utterance and try to imagine the facts on which it was built. Modern scholars are inclined to think the words did not come straight from Christ Himself, but are a summary of what the writer had seen happen since the Day of Pentecost. People had come under the influence of a divine revelation, and the effect on them was not priggishness but freedom. There were shams, no doubt, as there always have been : some of these were prigs. i88 HOME TRAINING [viii and others prided themselves on not being prigs ; but the broad result of the reception of the message in an honest and true heart was the bringing in of freedom where before there had been bondage — freedom from base desires, free- dom from all kinds of hampering egoism, freedom from the ineptitudes of conventional thought. That was the verdict of what must have been a singularly penetrating mind, on things taking place in the first century a.d. round the shores of the Levant. It is a verdict that expresses a noble confidence, and it would be to our gain if we made clear to ourselves why that confidence has after 1 800 years often given way to something more truly to be called paralysis or the tyranny of the dumb devil. Our survey has shown us that, put as briefly as possible, the drama of the young human life is the working out of the conflict between egoism and the loyal obedience to the one antidote of egoism, the love, that is, of something not the self : only therein can be found a force deep and intimate enough to outweigh and absorb the various desires which self-love pertinaciously and stealthily breeds in the soul. For some years the parents supply the need. But the time comes when both nature and custom viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 189 insist that their influence shall cease ; and what then ? Ideally, the parents' influence only gives way to a growing sense of allegiance to the Unseen. The reality of the idea of GOD will have been brought home to the boy's mind by the lives lived by his parents ; and what is required, then, is the translating of the idea into ordinary life. Where that is faithfully and patiently carried out there is abundant hope of the founda- tions of character being laid deep, solid, and stable. At this point we come upon a division in men's minds which for clearness' sake must be noticed but need not be discussed here. Quite briefly, it is this : One man conceives of his relation to GOD as that of a member of a divine Society to the Eternal ; the other thinks of himself as an individual whose heart has been turned by the revelation of GOD'S Love and the indwelling Spirit. To the first the Society, called the Church, is the body of believers to whom has been committed the deposit of the Faith. His attitude is that of a son to a mother, from whom he receives in an unquestioning temper the precious treasure handed down to all believers from the Day of Pentecost. The other finds 190 HOME TRAINING [viii the soul's individual commerce with GOD suffi- cient ; or at least we may say the collective ecclesiastical side of Christianity has for him less meaning. The former, in short, is the Catholic, the second the Protestant position. The Catholic parent will make more of what is sometimes called the Institutional side of religion — Confirmation, the Eucharist, and the Church anniversaries : the Protestant may or may not be more intellectually inclined, trusting in scholarship and Biblical research ; what he mainly trusts in is prayer and the sincerity of conversion. The home life will obviously be coloured by these prepossessions. I will pass by the whole question except to note that the Catholic home in respect of any given child's training starts fair. It is able to present the idea of GOD'S Presence, and the life of allegiance in an aspect congenial to a growing mind and wholesome because devoid of self-consciousness and the wrong sort of intro- spection. Outward forms, though of course capable of being abused, are a great help in planting the abstract idea of religion, and viewed only in this light, give the Catholic an advantage. But whichever line be adopted, the educational aim is the same — ^the training in the realization viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 191 of the truth of GOD'S Love and the Redemption of the World. Thus in all truly Christian homes a certain atmosphere for the boy to breathe brings it about that he comes into contact with the Author of all life and hope and good understanding. Hence there is nothing for which we may not expectantly strive. The gradual drinking in of the trans- cendent truth that the Source of all that is beautiful and happy and well ordered in the life that he sees lived by his parents, works the miracle in the child. It weans him from selfishness because in itself it is irresistibly winning ; and he learns that in obedience to his father's dictates, few in number but the outcome of the highest law his grown-up mind can conceive, lies the road to happiness, even though unimagined privations are to be faced meanwhile. But we shall be told that all this requires nothing short of the parents' conversion to Christ. The picture is one of a divine allegiance translated into family life, and that is only to be met with very rarely. Doubtless. But the profession of the principles on which such home training rests is not rare at all, but practically universal. And if I am told that it is a drawback that successful training can only be given when both parents 192 HOME TRAINING [viii are converted Christians, I cannot agree. It would make conversion doubly difficult if the training of our children could be complete without it. It fits in with all that we know about GOD to find that the increasing knowledge of Him and His Law and His Love works wondrously in the training of children, especially if both parents have felt its power. But yet this confusion of thought is exceedingly common, and requires a little disentangling. When a parent says to himself, " I admit that if my wife and myself were both converted, things would go better, but as we don't pretend we are, what we want is some counsel on a lower plane, better fitted for an ordinary English citizen," what is he assuming ? He is assuming that a conversion to GOD is only one of various prelimi- naries to the training of an immortal soul, that others as good might be found. But how can a Christian admit this ? The true view of the position must be as follows : It has been revealed to us that salvation, whether in this world or the next, is bound up with that kind of mental and spiritual turning to our Maker which is called Conversion. The doings of His will is not the taking up a fad, but is the one condition of entering into that which Christ called the viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 193 Kingdom of Heaven ; for we are to do the divine will in the same unquestioning spirit as that of a little child who is in a perfect relation to his earthly father and does his will. Let that stand for the central obligation of the family of GOD'S children. Now one of the most wonderful privileges allowed to us on earth is that of parent- hood. We bring at our own will an immortal being into the world. Is there anything strange in the fact that on the sincerity of our conversion to GOD it depends whether we can train that child aright ? If, on the other hand, this were not the case, if the supreme problem of setting that child's feet in the right road could be as well solved without conversion as with it, cer- tainly the result would be to make it almost impossible to believe Christ's words, " Except ye be converted and become as little children ye cannot enter the Kingdom of Heaven." At least it would mean that a parent outside the Kingdom is as well fitted for the task as if he were in it. And if for this task, why not for others ? In short, it would matter nothing if we were in the Kingdom or outside of it. We could do our duty as well in one state as in the other. While, then, I could not admit that anything N 194 HOME TRAINING [viii short of a true conversion and real godliness of mind in both parents can do what we want, it is worth noting that a home-life based on Christian ethics alone is hopeful as far as it goes. There are men and women who are able to strive after righteousness without knowing why ; and some of these despair of ever knowing more than they now know. Let us see how the problem is modified in their case. This is a profoundly interesting question. Practically it may be worded as follows : Granted that many parents have a deep and sincere love of goodness but little or no personal relation to GOD5 what are they to do ? The others who have the personal relation will, of course, institute ordinances in the household — family prayers, Grace at meals and church-going, saints' days, etc. But what are the others to make of all this ? Let them first recognize the value of these outward things to the child. It must not be forgotten that a child learns very little from grown-up people's talk (except facts from stories) but a great deal from experience. So a father eager for his children to grow up lovers of goodness must consider whether he is wise in foregoing any particular institution merely because it is hardly congenial to himself. He wishes the viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 195 children to seek after goodness, but he is stripping it of its personal character ; in other words, turning it into an abstraction. Is the child as likely to grasp the idea under these conditions as he would be if by the whole household, every day, something were done which is a corollary of the Presence of GOD ? Has he any ground for supposing that in this one subject alone outward action can be dispensed with ? If he wishes to teach patriotism he gets the child to observe anniversaries before he knows their meaning, feeling sure that the meaning will be learnt in due season. If he had the chance he would get him a seat to see the Coronation procession. But why, then. Why does he fight so shy of Holy days in the Church's calendar ? I am not thinking of men who see nothing divine in the Church's life, but of those who are perfectly willing to live that life in the household if they can be persuaded that it will help the children to grow up into good men and women. Well, the point is that with most of his surroundings encouraging his egoism, the child requires some- thing simple, strong, and continuous to make him realize that his true happiness lies outside of himself ; that those over and around him in the home are subject to the same law ; that 196 HOME TRAINING [viii obedience to duty means a fulfilling of his own true life, in so far as it is a serving of a Heavenly Father. You may turn him out, if you like, an adolescent with a vague idea that dutifulness is a better thing than lawlessness. Every educated young man in England knows this : but if you are to save him from himself, that idea must not be vague, but vivid ; not fitful, but abiding ; not an uneasy feeling which he can't get rid of, but a constraining power, irresistibly gentle,* at any moment imperceptible, but to be noted by its movement like the turning of the tide in a calm sea. That is what it must come to sooner or later, and if you acquiesce in anything short of this as your aim, you will do nothing. The issue is so wonderfully great, not chiefly because of the ruin that is possible for your boy, but because of the glory that is a certainty if you will only see it. Now whether you believe in the Christian doctrines or not, nothing can alter these facts. Your son may be great as GOD counts greatness, as the conqueror of his own selfishness and so the bringer of life to others ; but against that mass of self-regard we have to set the appeal of a Personality before which even his earthly father * Cf . a saying of Lacordaire (?), " La douceur est une force." viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 197 bows, the finite before the Infinite. Remem- bering, then, that we must not fob off the child with empty words, are you sure that you are right in saying that you can dispense with outward forms ? If there is the slightest hope that by their means you may plant the knowledge of an unseen world, of a growth in happiness possible for him in a life which is not that of self nor of the senses, but for which he will be willing to sacrifice all that he has, it is madness for you to neglect the chance. You have no evidence that it is not one of the very best open to you. The institution of family prayers is worth con- sidering from another point of view, that of discipline. The father's task is to make the attendance regular, and he will have no great difficulty if he makes the prayers a reality. But conceive what they often are ! Ill-chosen, mumbled, lifeless ; the passage from Scripture not explained, no reference made to any events in the locality or in public life — to sickness or to healing, or to any anxieties that may have befallen one of the household. If it were in any way necessary that this should be the procedure, certainly servants would be right to protest and the sooner the farce were given up the better. But if all is done that can be to make them real 198 HOME TRAINING [viii and alive, then the disciplinary side of them must not be forgotten. But let the duty be done joyfully, and with confident hope.* We should be better parents than we are if we bore in mind that children can understand joy but make nothing of grief ; that duty performed gloomily is a deterrent from all right living, all vital hope, all true belief in GOD. This may, in short, be a challenge not only to lovers of goodness who cannot pretend to be religious, but to all professing Christian parents. Are your principles such as constrain you to feel an increasing happiness in living, no matter what trouble may abound ? If so, do you * Compare as a hint from another world this passage in Father Congreve's " Christian Progress," p. 276 : " Every common thing is regarded among the sons of S. Patrick and S. Columbia as in the blessing of GOD. Is it good manners in Ireland among the peasants to-day to name any friend without GOD bless himF If we meet a man on the road and exchange a friendly word about the weather it must end with Thank the Lord. The well is holy and the tree that overshadows it ; the field is blessed, and the sea, and the boat. Who ever forgets there to make the holy sign, and to say Grace before meat ? And is there not still somewhere at the lighting of the evening rush-light in the cabin, the grace for light ? " Who are we, poor impotent adults, that we have come to withhold all this Celtic thankfulness from our children ? Our Lord implied that it was against nature for a father to give his children a stone instead of bread. But in the spiritual world we contrive to disappoint them in ways more deadly because less easily checked ; by giving them instead of nourishment, aridity ; instead of salvation, sawdust. viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 199 hold to them faster each year ? If not, are you right in thinking they are Christian principles at all ? In other words, if there is not a predomi- nating element of tranquil joy in a home, it is not informed by the Spirit of Christ, and it is most unlikely that the children will learn that the service of Christ is worth while. In presence of this plain fact it is wonderful that the ideal of many of our countrymen should be a life of faithful but grumbling and reluctant dutifulness. Such a life is a prolonged denial of our sonship. If the doing of duty is the doing of GOD'S will, can it be a matter for grumbling ? Only if we turn GOD into a hard taskmaster : an idea of Him clean contrary to that given us in the New Testament. There is indeed something strangely dusty in many conscientious English- men's view of life. It is as if we took it for granted that the thing which has been called the Life Eternal, or the Living Water, or the Bread of Heaven, must be and ought to be to our famished souls like a cracknel biscuit to the mouth : something stodgy and unsatisfying, which when consumed means the maximum of effort and minimum of nourishment, but which brings about one certain result, an increased difficulty in speaking so as to be understood. It 200 HOME TRAINING [viii is hardly credible that after listening in church to what we call a beautiful passage, " The fruits of the Spirit are Love, Joy, Peace," we can emerge from the sacred building and before we are twenty yards from the porch talk to each other of our life as if it were what M. Arnold calls a raking among the stones, and nothing more ; further, that we should rather plume ourselves for so doing, and dub anyone who does not as unsympa- thetic. If we were all bachelors and old maids this conduct would spread weariness far and near ; but suppose we have children at home ! We are cutting them off from all that is glorious and uplifting. They are one and all endowed with a deep instinct for two elements in life, towards which they must press continually onward or perish — ^joy and the harmony of order. But when we present to them a religious life as a dark, dry, unsatisfying thing, we not only tell of drought instead of refreshment, but we bring disorder where there ought to be peace, con- tradiction where there should be reason. And who can wonder at the outcome, when it is seen that we have been making the water-springs into a dry ground and " turning salvation into saw- dust " ? So much for the joyousness of the home, as an viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 201 indispensable evidence of the higher life : won- derful in its effect on adults, but a sine qua non for the children. It should be observed, hov^ever, that the joyousness w^hich tells on the soul as an evangelizing force is not the heedless merriment which sometimes reigns for a few years in an opulent household, merely the outcome of games, jollity, and good health; rather it is the inward peace which nothing can disturb — neither illness nor bereavement, nor the failure of plans, nor the malevolence of neighbours. Wherever parents can bear these blows without bitterness, from a conviction that whom the Lord loveth He chasteneth, they there and then become preachers of the Gospel to those nearest them, their own kith and kin. So too if they refrain from every kind of railing against the most tiresome of their acquaintances, even the snobs and the bores. If their forbearance stops short of this, as it nearly always does, then the home atmosphere fails to teach the wonder and the 'power of the godly life. Again, if the father presses forward in his life's work, whatever it is, obviously not from hope of ordinary gain, but as ministering in some way to others, and faints not though health fails and success is denied him, he too is a preacher of the Gospel to his children, and effective so 202 HOME TRAINING [viii long as he lifts up his heart to his Lord and Master. If he tries to do his duty with teeth set, grimly, doggedly, because he must, it is probable that the harder he goes at it the more repellent his virtue becomes, and he preaches anything but the story of the Cross because he has forgotten the joy. The joy that transforms suffering is the great Evangelistic force. That which merely consists in youthful roystering may be innocent, but is pretty sure to be unfruitful. If any parents think they can attain to this pitch of virtue without any belief in the Christian doctrine of the revelation of the divine Love, let them try ; or let them do their best to lift their children's minds out of themselves by other means. Every right-minded man will give them his warmest sympathy. Only let them never forget that they have to consider not whether their principles are satisfying to themselves but how they will be taken by their children. If these, as is probably the case, have nothing to do with an unseen Person, how do they strike the child-mind ? If the father finds that his own vitality and eagerness to help others survive the loss of friends, the decay of youth's prime, and a downward trend of politics, that is not all. This constancy may be due to the godliness of his own viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 203 parents, from which he learnt the secret of living, but which he somehow fails to pass on. There is, then, this broad consideration about which he would do well to clear his mind. But besides joy there is the harmony of order which a child instinctively craves. In the home life, while there are no limits to the demand made upon parents to exhibit not only self-control, wisdom, firmness, and love in all their dealings v^th their oflFspring, yet it is wonderful how lasting an effect may be discerned in even a partial obedience to the law. What law ? The law that unless the child can see and feel the submission of his parents to GOD he will in time establish for himself public opinion as the grand criterion of conduct. Now submission to GOD is shown not necessarily by heroism, but by scores of little graces in act, thought, and speech which all of us love and believe in, and all of us do actually practise in a measure. Every little conquest of temper, every ungrudging act of kindness to dim and unprepossessing neighbours, every effort at any kind of peace-making, every endeavour to reach the truth in controversial politics, every word of sympathy with sufferers in the antipodes, each and all of these things do something towards informing our children's little 204 HOME TRAINING [viii minds with a truth which nothing afterwards will ever entirely upset, namely, that above and beyond all that is best in average public opinion there is a law of living so far beyond public opinion that it often seems to contradict, whereas it really ratifies, men's best instincts. That law is the law exhibited in fullest perfection on Calvary : a self-committal to the will of GOD complete enough to set at nought all the virulence of human antagonism, and to overcome that antagonism by the power of love alone. Now I say that in a measure we parents of the present generation of " educated " English boys and girls do live lives which suggest the existence and the claim of this higher law to a certain point ; but we fail to enforce it with the highest sanction because we separate it disastrously from the realization of a Personal GOD : that means we enforce an ideal stripped of hope, and I challenge any critic of these pages to maintain and prove that the normal outcome of our training is not exactly what under these conditions we should expect it to be. We pass out into the world a swarm of young men who are not dreaming of dealing with life in the spirit of victorious serenity offered to them without measure : rather they timidly viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 205 aim at a conformity to a part of that moral law which they dare not dispute, grasping meantime at the hope, not of going on from strength to strength, but of reaching a sort of contentment in spite of daily shortcoming. The goal set before them is a meagre and dismal compromise, a beggarly travesty of the Christian forecast ; it is a watered-down version of certain rules of conduct which their parents have previously watered down before them : morality dealt out in driblets at the bidding of convention ; and such, in England at any rate, it is bound to be as long as the father's main demand is for a kind of propriety without any background of the promises of a Personal Unseen Father. On this latter belief being planted along with the belief in the earthly parents' love, wisdom, and power, depends the issue of life and death when the days come for the young man finally to determine how he is to guide his footsteps between the cradle and the grave. But we are going a little too fast. We have not exhausted the question how in childhood the great abstract idea can be made alive and potent in the young mind. Can anything more definite be said than that the parents have to live as nearly as they can in conformity with the Christian 2o6 HOME TRAINING [viii ideal ? Perhaps not ; but the formula has to be translated. It is really important to understand that certain features in the Christian household which are all but essential from the point of view of the child's requirements demand no great unattain- able saintliness on the part of the parents, but common sense and perseverance, the kind of qualities on which John Bull prides himself. I am addressing certainly a very large number of people — those who profess Christian beliefs and have faith in the main proposition of this book, viz. that the implanting of those beliefs depends on the home. Another point on which there can hardly be any dispute is that what gives the living conviction of a Present Loving GOD is the general life of the home ; what gives that living conviction strength and ineradicable firmness is the bringing of it into contact with moral problems as they arise. In thousands of modern house- holds both of these two vital requirements are ignored. The general life of the home is not ordered at all, except with a view to the con- venience of the grown-ups and the pleasure of the children ; and if moral lapses occur, the only principle which is enforced is propriety. Let us see if this is so. First as to the general viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 207 home life, what details may be regarded as essential for the planting of the idea of GOD in the children's minds ? At this point I can hear the objection of the modern John Bull. He says : " Here is a man who has nothing better to recommend than the antiquated custom of family prayers, which if it ever had had any value would have ensured a larger number of Christians than modern England can show." I will remark on this that there is nothing sillier than to call a custom antiquated merely because your par- ticular neighbours seem to be giving it up. If there is anything sillier it is the heedless assump- tion that because the practice is being given up, therefore it is useless. When Dr. F. W. Forster, whose forcible work on marriage should be read by every one,* was girded at by his sceptical friends in Germany because he, originally an advanced free-thinker, advocated old-fashioned '' orthodox " views on the subject, his answer was, " If the Christians are right, why shouldn't I say so ? " Parents who give up such a practice as family prayers mainly because they know of many other people who have done the same, are * " Marriage and the Sex Problem " ; Forster : Wells Gardner, Darton and Co. The favourable reception which this powerful work seems to have received in Germany is one of the encouraging symptoms of the present day. Vide Preface, p. xiv. 2o8 HOME TRAINING [viii just as much the slaves of pubHc opinion and ignorant cant as the narrowest Lowlander who forbids his children secular history on Sunday. I ask that the question be considered from the child's point of view, who is slowly forming the ideas on which he is going to live and die, as to whether his mother's talk about a Heavenly Father is an unintelligible jumble, or food for his soul. Whatever efforts you may make, it is impossible that a large part of the impression of the daily life should not, as a rule, be colourless, in respect of teaching the Divine Presence. To the child much of what goes on must seem to be purely mundane. The question, then, is, what provision can you make to secure that every day something should happen which has no meaning except that it bring the family life into touch with GOD ? If you clearly see the problem, how to make the Unseen more potent in its influence than the usual compromise between desire and propriety, you will go on to the next step and acknowledge that if family prayers are becoming unfashionable there is an additional reason for you to keep them up at all costs. The less the practice is observed in other houses the more meaning it will have in yours ; or perhaps I should say, the more clearly will its true meaning stand out. It is a viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 209 gain that a good thing should be independent of the feeling of the majority. The same observation applies to Grace at meals. The more irksome, that is the more unfashionable, you find it is to acknowledge the Divine Presence at such moments, the more value the observance v^ill have. It is a practice based on a very simple but easily forgotten fact, viz. that our true relation to GOD depends primarily on our expressing our gratitude. I should not venture to say -primarily if it were not for St. Paul's teaching on the subject.* But if we think of the home problem we cannot fail to see the grand danger. It is that the frima facie view of the world, of life, of time is utterly untrue. Our Creator is not a Being who sets before His children tasks they cannot fulfil. Suffering is not a thing to be shunned at all costs as if it were the ultimate * This is not the place for an exposition of Scripture, but I must refer to Romans i, where the reader can verify for himself the conviction of the Apostle that the piteous degradation of the nations round the Mediterranean was originally caused by their refusing to give thanks to GOD. If this arresting utterance is well weighed, we shall soon see that it bears most particularly on home life. Contrast also the miracle of the ten lepers : one of the occasions, deeply to be pondered on, when Jesus with all His unrivalled knowledge of human nature was surprised. Another occasion was after the Transfiguration {^ide Luke, ix. i). What shocked Him most was not our frailty but our refusal to behave as if life eternal were really within our reach. O 210 HOME TRAINING [viii human ill, but a source of the deepest joy and , the indispensable condition of spiritual growth. Pleasure is not the same thing as happiness ; but the one soon palls, the other is attainable, but only if it is not pursued. And so forth. Now the one grand antidote to the poisonous error with which our atmosphere is full is the faith, deep in the mind, that in spite of appearances, and even because of its lowering skies, life is a glorious thing full to overflowing of a hope that never fails. If the best chance of this faith being planted is given by the home life, the means by which this is done is by the daily expression to GOD of a thankful spirit, uttered by the assembled family and friends, and no opportunity is better for the purpose than meals. Food is the suste- nance of our physical life, and we are thankful for food because the life which it sustains is a Divine gift incomparably precious for the uses to which it can be put. The only person who would rationally omit Grace is a would-be suicide. This view of food is true and displaces the false and desperately common view that food is merely for our pleasure, and in displacing that false view it saves us from bondage to appetite, the first kind of bondage to which growing boys are liable. Like all truth, this truth makes us free. viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 211 Next, I would mention the respect due to elders. There are many homes where a notice- able decline in this matter has lately come about. I would hazard the following explanation. About 1870, and for many years subsequently, alarm began among serious-minded people concerning the moral question, especially in connexion with school-life. It came to be felt that one safeguard consisted in the establishment of a confidence between fathers and sons ; and in the effort to secure this relation of confidence, many fathers allowed the old respectful tone of their children to die away. This was a grievous mistake. Whether they gained in intimacy may be doubted ; what they lost was the constant reminder to the children that all authority comes from above, the constant presentment of the truth that the majesty of law rests upon something unseen. What is most deplorable also is that even if a familiar intimacy is secured, and even if it is employed for giving of help against some early school trials, it is a poor, uncertain, and temporary aid in difficulties which can only be surmounted by deeply rooted principle. That principle is the Divine majesty of law. It is easily weakened by worldly influences ; but unquestionably the old-fashioned respectful behaviour to parents 212 HOME TRAINING [viii tended to corroborate it and give it a lasting value. Any father who thinks that his advice can meet the need as v^ell, is wrong. Another ingredient in the picture of the Christian home is the absence of worry and hurry. I am very loth to write on such elementary matters as if I knew better than other people how to deal with them ; but there is little doubt that if we all habituallyjthought of the effect on our children, of our little infirmities, we should combat them manfully and persistently, and with excellent results. There are homes to be found where a vast amount of work is got through, the industry is unremitting, and yet there is no sign of fuss and scramble. If this is combined, as it some- times is, with plenty of mirth, though the adults are known to be wrestling with dark and baffling problems, the atmosphere is that which nothing, as far as I know, can produce, except a firm and lively faith in the goodness of the Unseen GOD. There is nothing wonderful in its influence. It is the corollary of all the religious teaching which the children have received, and helps to bring the great mystery down into ordinary life in its most attractive form. For suppose the contrary. When the father of a family is always on the rush, always lamenting the shortness of his leisure time, viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 213 querulously detailing the many good and useful things he would do if he had time, he is very effectively preaching ungodliness to his children : he is showing them that he has forgotten his fundamental beliefs, which his children cannot learn unless he practises them. He professes that he and others are living in GOD's Presence and that their lives are ordered by Him. If that is so, it is certain that there are many limits set by Him, not by Satan, to our freedom of action. There are many things the man would like to do, but he can submissively renounce many of them, as Christ did, because the equipment of time and power which GOD has given him only allows him a certain number of activities. Every minute of railing at this state of things is railing against the Most High, a complaint against the ordering of human life. Brought into contact with that, a child puts away the misty notions he may have gathered from his mother about religion, and proceeds to interpret the world, not as a redeemed place or a scene of law and order, but as a moral chaos. Behaviour enforces on him its own meaning; abstract teaching does not. A Christian, on the other hand, remembers the great solemn words : " Are there not twelve hours 214 HOME TRAINING [viii in the day ? If any man walk in the day he stumbleth not because he seeth the light of this world. If a man walk in the night he stumbleth because there is no light in him." " He stumbleth not." The gradual conform- ing of a man's will to GOD'S brings tranquillity and joy into his life no matter how much it be cur- tailed and hampered. Every effort is made to put away all hindrances ; but those which can't be put away he transforms into helps, and learns that, according to the revelation of Christ's story, his own work is fruitful in proportion as he turns his disabilities into evidences of trust, and into stepping-stones of progress. Of course it will be objected that all this is very difficult, and means the discipline of a lifetime. I have never denied its difficulty, nor the length of time that for most of us is required before we can bring anything worthy to be called tranquillity into busy lives. All I insist on is that if we fail in this endeavour we are spoiling our children, by showing them either that our religion has no bearing on ordinary life, and is therefore mere talk, or that we ourselves are too weak to practise it. Both lessons are deadly. Because it takes so long for most people really to order their lives, we can understand why schoolmasters like to take viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 215 charge of boys who have been brought up by their grandmothers. DisabiUties of all kinds, it seems, are judged by people in one of two ways, and it is worthwhile to get this point clear. (We are passing now from Hurry to Worry.) A hard-working county councillor has made all his arrangements for a three weeks' holiday in the Dolomites : being only forty-five years old, he looks forward to some fine rock-climbing. Rooms are taken in the right hotel, his wife and children are coming, and every detail fixed ; but on the day before starting he puts out his knee, slipping on an orange- peel in Bermondsey. Now if he can treat this most galling disappointment with serenity and without marring the home life, among other rich blessings which everybody reaps, his children's vital belief in GOD is strengthened. That man is really alive, and you cannot be in his company — though he says not a word about it — without learning something about the highest thing man can know. In seeing this thing grow before his eyes in his children's inner beings, he reaps his reward. That, we may observe, comes of his recognizing the traces of GOD'S ordering his daily life. His neighbour, on the other hand, the retired colonel, takes the view — though he too 2i6 HOME TRAINING [viii says nothing about it — that this sort of nuisance comes from the devil, and according to that conviction he deals with it — by clamour, railing, upsetting of plans, fuming on the journey, fretting in smoking-rooms, perversely snatching at the pleasures of the table to make up for his dis- appointment, and so spoiling the lives of every- body within reach. Who can measure the harm done at home by the elders reviling the weather ? We come out of church after lustily singing the harvest hymn which ascribes "the soft refreshing rain" to GOD, and if the said rain upsets our picnic we speak of it as if it came straight from Satan. Of course good manners demand some self-control, this being one of the instances where godliness helps to make a pleasant afternoon. But it often happens that some one is downcast and glum and will think us unsympathetic unless we are the same. However, it must certainly make things worse if we sympathize, as many people pride themselves on doing, not wisely but too well. Similarly, we undo all our teachings of Chris- tianity by revealing our paganism at the slightest hint of the approach of death.* Paganism is * A paper which deserves to be widely read is to be found in one of the numbers of the " Parents' Review " for 191 3 : the title is *' The Fear of the Microbe." viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 217 the correct word, because our conventional behaviour expresses exactly the same feelings as are portrayed on a Greek sarcophagus : the unalloyed, hopeless sadness at parting ; the keen anguish at the sight of beauty marred by the finger-prints of the dread enemy, and all the spring promise of young lives cut off before their summer prime ; all the melodious melancholy which poets and musicians have uttered for us about the loss of our dear ones : — if all this is unrelieved by any sincere hope, every death is a fresh bewilderment to the children of the house. Why ? Are relatives to be expected to feel as happy as if nothing had happened ? Certainly not : the question is foolish. I would try another line of approach to the truth. Imagine young people hearing on Tuesday their elders singing with deep emotion a hymn in the churchyard like " On the Resurrection-morning," and then for weeks after not speaking one word on the subject which implies any belief in a life here- after ; what are they to make of it ? I daresay this is natural and conventional conduct, but it is worth while to remark that whereas a death ought to be, and sometimes is, a wondrous lesson in the apprehension of the Unseen, it generally is little but a flat contradiction to all a child has 2i8 HOME TRAINING [vin learnt about GOD. Strength of character in the long run is the result of the deepest beliefs being firmly planted and consistently fostered into growth. But what is there consistent in solemnly imparting to a child a tenet about an after-life and then calling on him to act exactly as if no after-life had ever been imagined ? The aboli- tion of hearse-plumes from our highways has been a gain ; but I fear it is rather due to a dislike of gloom than to a more robust faith. Matthew Arnold was not reckoned an Orthodox Christian. But there is a finer tone of hope in " Rugby Chapel " than in much of our condolence to-day. It is thought to betray a want of sympathy not to enter fully into the most heathenish kind of grief, whereas the only true sympathy is to pass on the knowledge that this earthly life is not all. There is much more that might be said, but unless we ourselves have had proof of what human sympathy can be when it is enriched with a sense of the life to come, it would only be speaking to deaf ears. Let us, then, pass on to a very different subject. What is snobbery ? Something out of which we reap a rich harvest of jokes and a store of telling incongruities. But we often forget that snobbery would be a most rational kind of conduct if it viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 219 were not for a prevailing belief in GOD. I take snobbery to be an avowed worship of successful people as soon as they have been decked with titles. But consider : Society agrees to dis- tinguish those who have attained what it calls success. Those who cultivate the acquaintance of these distinguished ones and plume themselves thereon are laughed at for being snobs. But what is there to laugh at ? Our countrymen tell us in plain and picturesque language, " Here is a man who has done better than other people. So let him put a coronet on his writing-paper." Suppose, then, we are of a docile turn of mind, we catch Society's hint, and, without questioning, take the man at the valuation of others and do our best to gain his notice and enter his circle. (We treat the titles as certificates : they save us from the exertion of determining before we are told who the successful are.) This is not conceit but a form of humility, a bowing to the opinion of the community. There is no apparent reason why we should be thought ridiculous for acting so. But if, on the other hand, we have a conviction somewhere deep down in our minds that He who made this world " seeth not as man seeth " ; that His requirement has little or nothing to do 220 HOME TRAINING [viii with the making of good investments or the inheriting of suburban land, but simply with obedience to His Will and a growing likeness to the character of Christ, then it is impossible not to feel the snob is ridiculous — not humble nor docile, but simply ridiculous. Experience, how- ever, shows that this feeling is liable to interrup- tion ; and when the conviction about the Divine ordering of life is triumphantly quenched, incidents like the following are bound to happen, and if they ever become normal we should all come to take them as a matter of course. Thirty- four years ago I was learning German in a pension in Dresden full of English people : among them was a lady who lived on a storey above ours, and one day I paid her a ceremonious little visit, and it happened we set to talking, languidly, about the Ashantee War. I made the safe remark that the Ashantees were thought to be good fighters. " Yes," was the reply, '" my friend. Lady X., says they fight very well indeed." This mention of Lady X. is only to be explained by the speaker's determination that I should realize she had a titled friend, though there was no evidence that Lady X. had any first-hand or other knowledge of the Ashantees which we could not have con- tributed ourselves ; and I went away with a viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 221 suspicion that if we had been talking about deep-sea fishing or the transit of Venus, Lady X.'s opinion would have been no less readily quoted. Yes, it is certain that where the belief in the Divine Being is too weak to affect ordinary life such incidents will occur. But let it be noted that the humour of them will disappear. Snob- bery will abound but will no longer be amusing. Some of us owe a debt to Mr. Mallock for pointing this out in a magazine article written about the same time as Lady X. was quoted, when, like other young men, we were disposed lightly to question the foundations of our religion. He explained that if religion died away humour would go with it. There were many things then, as now, which we did not understand, but we knew what it was to laugh heartily at snobbish- ness, an infirmity not unknown at Cambridge in those days ; and the prospect of the thing itself continuing but all that was ludicrous in it dis- appearing was lurid enough to give us pause. Fancy snobs increasing on every hand while those who were able to laugh at them became fewer and fewer, till at last there would be only one left, and he would become grave simply because it is hard to laugh alone ! This picture of a possible world forced us to reflect on the greatness 222 HOME TRAINING [viii of the issue at stake, like some of the noble writings of Dean Church, but from a more secular point of view. We shuddered at the thought of " Punch " growing thinner and thinner, till at last only the cover was left, a dry husk of something once nourishing and powerful to move. Thus we may gauge to some extent the effect of snobbery prevailing in a home. It waxes when religion wanes, because we are so made that, while we cannot serve both GOD and Mammon, we must serve one or the other. Religion proceeds from the acknowledgment of GOD ; snobbery from the acknowledgment of man and his judgments, as supreme in human life. One principle must oust the other, though in many cases it is hard to distinguish the offspring of the two ; but I fancy the reason snobbery is so laughable is that it is patently opposed to the ideal, but is as yet, among adults, harmless. But from children it drives out the knowledge of GOD, because to them incongruities are painful and impossible. Again much more might be said. But if a certain American dentist was approxi- mately right in saying that we English are all snobs, there is something for parents, at any rate, to think quietly over, though the subject seems at first sight merely material for fun. viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 223 One more instance and I have done. Bearing in mind the fundamental requirement of the case, that the child should see round him day by day a home in which life is lived according to a law higher than and wholly different from what he knows of inclination and pleasure, what are we to say of the following state of things ? The father is a vigorous and successful man of business, wherein he finds his energies become more and more absorbed. Like most Englishmen, he nourishes an unassailable conviction that the very first thing he has to do is to do " his job." Other people seem often to find attraction in speculation, in building castles in the air, in forwarding rather idealistic schemes for the bettering of rather remote people ; but for him " his job " is sufficient. It is true he gave no great thought originally, nor did anybody, to the previous question whether he was right in choosing that job at all ; but now that he is in it, he has no doubt whatever that his main work in life is to do it. So he does it. Now business to an alert, vigorous man is often interesting, sometimes exciting, and he finds it more difficult every year to give undivided attention to any- thing else. Meantime its intricacy increases, so that when he comes home in the evening he is 224 HOME TRAINING [viii unable, even if he tried, to tell his wife and family anything about it which they can under- stand. This work of his is now quite sundered from his home, and all that his children know about it is that it has to do with the making of money — that when money is being plentifully made their father is cheerful, and when some is likely to be lost he comes home harassed and mother tells them not to worry him with chatter next morning at breakfast because " things are going badly in the City." Or it may be that this little difficulty does not exist because father has to start too early for his business to allow him to see his children at breakfast, and returns too late in the evening, and perhaps often goes off on visits for the week-end ; so that all they know about him is that they are bound to respect and honour and obey him, and that with all possible diligence he is making money. Meantime the mother, whose face betrays the same anxiety or relief according as the last financial venture is prospering or not, conscientiously teaches the children day by day the story of One who showed quite consistently by His life and words that money is almost nothing in comparison with the doing of GOD'S will; that is, with maintaining true peace of mind through manifold changes of viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 225 fortune, and growing to be more and more eager in making every one around us happier. Is it to be supposed by any sane-minded man that those children start life with a fair prospect of understanding the relative importance of things, or of resolutely giving themselves to the course of living which leads to love, joy, and peace ? By way of forestalling criticism, let me contem- plate for a moment the contrary picture. John Pritchet at sixteen years of age has learnt how to make all matters of interest matters of prayer to GOD. It never occurs to him when his uncle offers him an opening in a thriving broker's firm that he should accept it without thinking care- fully whether it was the best line of life for him, and thinking carefully always meant for him prayer. So before long, and somehow with a sense that he was doing the right thing, he entered on the business, and gradually found that there were in it many opportunities of guiding all sorts of people in their financial affairs, of keeping needy but excitable folk from rash ventures, and helping the preoccupied with solid advice as to their mundane concerns. Meantime his leisure hours have been naturally more and more occu- pied with matters of moment — chiefly local m6 home training [viii concerns, undertaken with the object of liberating poor hampered lives from distressing conditions so that he might spread happiness everywhere. Thus Pritchet gradually becomes a centre of quiet beneficence, though a steady-going, fairly prosperous business man. Now what is the difference in his home life from that of our friend just described ? It is too great to be fairly portrayed. In the first place, all his behaviour makes it clear that, whatever takes place in his professional work, he is profoundly content owing to his sense of being engaged in the task which he was called into the world to do. As a very young man he showed less and less inclination to grumble — not, appa- rently, because a grumbler fails to get other people to do what he wants, true though this is, but because he has always kept alive in himself the feeling of service, not primarily to his fellow men, though outwardly it takes for the most part that form, but to GOD. And this in spite of the fact that a good many things occur to distress him ; indeed for a few years his income was brought very low owing to some fraud prac- tised upon him, never clearly explained. When it became known, some of his City friends hurried to his office to press their condolences upon him ; viii] TRAINING IN SINGLE-MINDEDNESS 227 but to their amazement they found him just as he always had been, merely remarking that he would have to live extremely quietly for some years in order to educate his three boys, " but none of us will be any the worse for that.'' Of his friends one or two saw on what this self- possession was based, but the remainder feared he was a little mad. As to his wife and children, though they had the highest respect for him before, they now learnt that godliness not only keeps a man from doing wrong and blundering, hustling, and criticizing his neighbours, but that it is simply the manifested power of the Holy Spirit to bring immeasurable good out of appa- rently irreparable evil. The effect on the children has been that they have set before themselves a standard of conduct which is not of this world. IX: PERSPECTIVE AND FREEDOM TT is possible that some who have followed this discussion so far may be tempted to believe that it does definitely lead to one con- clusion, viz. that of all ways of saving and purifying English society and rescuing the Empire from decay, the most hopeful and most effective is the consistent presentation of the Christian life in the home. As a corollary from that conclusion, they would advocate the practice of Christianity for the benefit of the country. It is on this state of mind that I feel bound to offer some final remarks. With regard to the similar problem in France, it has been stated that numbers of the most patriotic of the young men to-day are committing themselves to the guidance of the Church, not because they have come to believe more than the last generation believed of Catholic doctrine, but because they are staggered at the spectacle of their country sinking into the abyss from general cyni- cism and a too rampant questioning of principles. In the conviction that the only cure is the re- 228 ix] PERSPECTIVE AND FREEDOM 229 establishment of ecclesiastical discipline, the patriots are now ardent Catholics who abstain from speculation and give themselves to such pursuits as a military career, aviation, &c. This movement is supported by two organs of the Press, one of which falls in v^th the tone of the young men and confines itself to patriotism and practical affairs, while the other argues in favour of Catholic dogma. This state of things reminds us of de Tocqueville's impressive remark that his country's vocation was to make experiments for the rest of Europe. The experiment now being made is, I believe, novel in its extent and in its quasi-nsLtiomii character. It is an attempt to use religion for the support of patriotism ; or rather, to obey GOD because to do so is beneficial to man. The question which is at stake is whether religion can thrive under such conditions ; whether its vitality does not wholly depend on its being practised and fostered and handed on solely for its own sake. If, as I decidedly believe, any ulterior motive for the supporting or preach- ing of Christianity must sooner or later undermine it altogether, it is clear that we in England may be inclined to make a disastrous mistake. It is anyhow a very common experience to hear religious practices advocated because they will 230 HOME TRAINING [ix make this world a better place to live in ; they will pacify the labour unrest, or restore the declining birth-rate. The point is of capital importance and demands a paragraph or two. Are we Christians in order to benefit men : or do we benefit men because we are Christians ? The first answer comes from the Lord's Prayer. Many people are like Talleyrand, not doctrinal Christians, yet inclined to repeat that prayer on their death-beds. There is something in it which corresponds to our deepest sense of our relation to GOD. But it is often overlooked that the leading petitions concern His glory, not the benefit of men. Moreover, if the message and claim of Christianity are calmly considered, it will be felt, I am sure, that normally there must be a priority of one of the divisions of the religious life to the other. A knowledge, however rudimentary, of the love of GOD must come before the fulfilling of His will in practical life, else the latter will fail for want of discernment and motive. The little child whom we are bidden to copy is not expected to obey till he has learnt to love his parent, and so dutifulness is not the source of gratitude but its offspring. Thus our Lord's work may be summed up shortly in this way : He began by reminding men of their ideal ix] PERSPECTIVE AND FREEDOM 231 (Repent ye) and announcing that something in relation to that ideal, corporate and spiritual in its essence, was to be found. (The Kingdom of Heaven is at hand.) Then followed the teaching and healing of the multitudes and the choosing of the Apostles : the teaching being an insistence on the Fatherhood of GOD and all that that implies in ordinary life ; the Apostles being trained to carry this message abroad and let it spread to all men. Then the Saviour lived out His principles, showing what they involved of triumph over uttermost suffering and death itself. Thus the message is news of GOD 's attributes ; the claim is that our life here should be a response to the good news, made in a spirit of thankfulness, trust, courage, and large-hearted love. Unless this perspective of Christianity is utterly wrong, it warns us against confusing the effects of obedience with its motive, and putting obedience before thankfulness. The child first discovers he is loved ; then returns the love : and in doing so gladly gives his obedience, for a long time without a thought as to whether that obedience is good for him and for others, or not. So when the modern Christian urges his countrymen to practise Christianity because it is salutary for the country and a tonic for children's characters, 232 HOME TRAINING [ix he is reversing the order observed by the New Testament throughout, and by every child in a well-ordered home. Thus parents who are sincerely anxious for a child's highest welfare are called upon, first, to establish their own relation of gratitude to GOD, through Christ ; secondly, to enable him to do the same, confident that the results will be the strengthening and uplifting of that ineffable thing which they have been allowed to transmit to him and which we call his soul. Only so can we reasonably hope that against all the various spells of desire his heart will be " established and will not shrink." Having done that, our next duty is to leave the character to follow its own bent, knowing that there is a positive gain in the negative policy of non-interference when not foolishly pursued. It leaves the confidence in us which was planted in the mind of the child unweakened for the years that are coming. But there is much more in it than this, and here we touch upon the point of contact between the fear of GOD and a common- sense home-training. People are more anxious to-day about their children than they were, and, like all anxiety, this particular kind often issues in fussiness and bootless meddling. ix] PERSPECTIVE AND FREEDOM 233 But what we call meddling is not only bootless, but plainly and positively mischievous in that it disparages the central message with which parents are charged on each child's behalf. For him we embody a higher rule of life than inclination, viz. that true happiness lies in obedience to the will of the unseen Being who has revealed enough of Himself, His being and His attributes and His love to show us what that will is. But even as so worded the message is too abstract for the child's mind : it can only be conveyed through the personal relation in which the parents stand to him. If that relation is marred by their constraining the growing character into their own groove by a too-watchful repression, by needless harangues, by over-readiness to show him where he is wrong, the result is that the Divine rule of life comes to him clothed in the garb of a nuisance. We often forget too that he has not the wherewithal to check this impression. If goodness to him is mainly associated with inter- ference with his freedom, he is bound to grow into the idea that GOD is a hard taskmaster, and on that idea is easily built the grim unsightly super- structure called Pharisaism. Or, perhaps more likely, associating as he must the idea of GOD with the curtailment of his self-development. 234 HOME TRAINING [ix he finds that idea — the only one he has — in startHng conflict with another which is prior to it in time and more deeply rooted, viz. that of the expansion of his own nature, or, as we put it, the fulfilment of the law of his own being, the living of a natural spontaneous life. Here, in short, we come upon a fact deserving of close attention on the part of parents who are inclined to be anxious. The careless and all who are disposed by temperament to let things take their course are perhaps already convinced of its truth. But to the anxious businesslike parent, the man who has learnt in his profession that when evils exist it is his duty to extirpate them, it is a vitally grave matter that the best-inten- tioned check on the child's spontaneous activity may be to him merely a poisoning of his idea of GOD'S will. Somehow we must learn that the Truth will make us free. That means that if truth is fairly presented to the child it will only for a time give him the impression of a needless interference. At such an age as ten, for instance, experience ought to have taught him that when his father forbids him a gun, or a lawn tennis party, or a help of lobster salad, it means not less but greater freedom in the long run ; that what- ever the reasons for the prohibition may be, he IX] PERSPECTIVE AND FREEDOM 235 will ultimately learn that they were good in that they were concerned with furthering his happiness, not with making " Jack a dull boy.'' Whereas, if this is not so, it is necessary to remember that we are introducing a contradiction into his mind concerning the deepest things about which he knows something : the divine will and his own liberty. This is the explanation of the plain fact that in all really successful instances of home- training parental interference has apparently been rare rather than the reverse. But if rare, it has only been successful when the true relation of the child to GOD has been first implanted.* There is one corollary of a practical character vdth which I v^U conclude. If the above estimate of the dominating influence of the early training is not wholly * Evidence for the broad truth of this generalization can be culled by observation and from novels. One lately out, and much discussed, comes to our aid in this matter. I refrain from naming it for fear of being quoted as a whole-hearted admirer of the work ; the truth being that it is marred throughout by the writer's obsession with sexual problems, and in places it is nauseating. But it shows a grasp of some principles of training. The heroine is born with an unusually vigorous craving after self-assertion, self-development, and hence shows a fine rebellious- ness against interference. But in the home no deep principle of life is taught either by precept or example. Consequently her life is a random search for gratification amid the most risky surroundings, and the picture is singularly vivid, often repellent, but in the main undoubtedly true. Like many modern novelists, 236 HOME TRAINING [ix wrong, if, that is, it may be truly conceived of as the normally deciding factor in character- building, then plainly the most hopeful line for social reformers to take is to restore and re- invigorate the general idea of the English home. It is to be feared that among the multitudinous parents of elementary school children the notion of a home-life as a blending of discipline and unshakable love has almost wholly disappeared : that among many other sections of society it is held to in theory, but in practice is grievously traversed and flouted because the thought of the ever-observant, ever-learning child has been faint ; his share in the matter has been forgotten : and that while we have been imagining ourselves worthy of respect we have been giving him stones for bread : and instead of being guided into the Truth that makes free, he has been dulled and bewildered by a blurred picture of GOD — that is, by a muddled interpretation of life. If this is so, there is something to be done. the writer has a gift for portraying decay, not to say putrefaction, but seems singularly ignorant of the processes of renewal. Hence the reader's hope for some encouragement in his view of life is almost starved. But there are two true details on which he should fasten his attention. The ballet girl is saved from the uttermost abyss by two influences — one the recollection that her mother once stood firm against temptation ; the other, the winsomeness of her infant child. ix] PERSPECTIVE AND FREEDOM 237 We are being guided into more rational action while we strive to make our countrymen happier : for, while not ceasing to collect statistics, to make practical experiments, to recast and readjust our social fabric, it is required of us that we should give the best of our thought and energy to that department of life from which all that is quicken- ing, as well as all that is degrading and awry, ultimately proceeds. For instance, nothing could be apparently more necessary than rational action in settling the relations of Labour and Capital : but consider how far more manageable this problem would be if a larger number of parents were stirred by a true sense of their responsibility in being called upon to present to their children the picture of a consistent and unselfish life. Omitting all that may be imputed to ignorance and muddle-headedness — about the prevention of which in the home much might be said — the really baffling fact is the huge number of men who take it for granted that ease and affluence are the most desirable things that men can hope to secure. If this is a delusion — and in the bottom of our hearts we all know it is — then the positive truth must be taught ; and it can only be taught hopefully in the homes. But, I shall be told, this means that the mass 238 HOME TRAINING [ix of parents of all classes must be converted from worldly to godly views of life before any good is done. How quixotic ! How Utopian ! If this criticism is to prevail, the country is doomed. What I am contending for does not mean that we are to sit still dreaming of a day in the future when every slum-home will be a centre of training in godliness ; nor need it mean that every active man is to give his energies to nothing but exhorting people to be good parents. But it does mean that a good deal more attention should be given to this problem than is now given. The years pass by and swarms of children grow into manhood with the Divine spark within them quenched by the opinion that mundane goods are the real goods and all else is flummery and talk. There is no remedy for this evil except in the homes. But there are thousands and thousands of homes where the intentions of the parents are on the whole good and the children really docile, really ready to receive the truth of things and the beginnings of the higher life, and yet the opportunity is spoilt because the message is muddled or withheld. Meantime, till the right view of life, of its desires and hopes and appetites, is imparted in childhood, most of our practical endeavours are ix] PERSPECTIVE AND FREEDOM 239 spoilt by selfishness. We toil to give the working man a decent cottage and separate sleeping- rooms, &c. Why does he ruin it by sub-letting and living in piggishness as before ? Because in his own sphere he is imitating all that he has under- stood of the life of the rich and great, viz. the gratification of ordinary desire. Or a society is formed for some admirable object, great names are collected, money comes in, a big meeting is held, and a committee elected. Everything looks promising at the start, but after a year or two the attendance falls off because the shrewdest men on the committee prefer to play golf or because they come without any knowledge of the facts. The thing dribbles along feebly and fitfully, its power for good almost entirely spoilt because the people who are running it still cling to the belief that comfort and amusement come first in order of desirability, and the lifting the lives of others second or third. There is no way likely to be successful of counteracting this natural opinion except in the homes. Similarly we quarrel unceasingly about the religious education in our elementary schools, forgetting that whatever it is it will be too weak to counteract the endless evils of home-neglect. If we diverted some of the energy now spent in 240 HOME TRAINING [ix sectarian quarrels to appealing to the natural love of children in the parents, calling on them to teach by practising the fear of GOD, the beginning of wisdom, instead of grumbling because some one else is better off ; to insist on obedience to law and response to love, instead of alternating roughness and neglect with more disastrous indul- gence, there would be a lift in our school-training, and even our platform wranglings might cease. I am not able to suggest the machinery for carrying this out : but not long ago I heard a striking testimony from a schoolmistress who had managed to get all the parents of a large school of slum children to come together and listen willingly to her earnest appeal for co-operation and help. It looks as if some of the noble unselfishness of those school teachers who now devote themselves to old scholars' clubs and the like would be profitably spent on making friends with the best parents and gradually spreading sound ideas in wider circles. Of course there are difficulties ; but at least the teachers can appeal to sound instincts which it takes a great deal of vicious-mindedness wholly to kill. But in the main, and as far as we can see, progress depends on those who now instinctively and unconsciously fashion the home-life so that ix] PERSPECTIVE AND FREEDOM 241 it becomes to the children a daily reminder of the Divine Presence. That is to say, it is for them to understand what they are doing and to pass on the message to others who know it not. It is said that there are many thousand homes in which the parents' responsibility for the children is almost dead ; and as long as that is the case there is a rich mission-field on which any true lover of his own kind can sow the seed of life. Those who know the work of the Mothers' Union testify that when speakers are brought into contact with the parents to whom home-life is a real difiiculty, stifled, that is, by grinding necessities and degrading sights and sounds, they yet can appeal with confidence to the response of deep natural instincts. For years and years, perhaps always, there will be among us many other calls to service of a wholly different sort. Schools must aim at filling gaps which ought never to have been left empty, and at fostering the seed which perhaps has never been sown. If some- times their work is blessed and the teachers are tempted to believe that they have done the unspeakable thing and given the child his first feeling of GOD, let them beware of the self- complacency which may spoil all their zeal, and Q 242 HOME TRAINING [ix of the delusion which may be the beginning of a life's undoing. Now and again, it is true, the miracle seems as if it happened in later years, and as if it were wrought by the hands not of kinsfolk but of strangers. Such may be the experience, not only of teachers but of rescue workers, lec- turers in men's clubs, even by labour exchanges. But I cannot believe that the call to service which is pealing louder and stronger throughout our land is telling us that the planting of the Divine thing and the first hint of the sacrifice of self are normally to be the concern of those who only help adolescence or later life. These things tell of the achievement of the father and mother in the home : they are its accompaniment and its crown. PRINTED AT THE BALLANTYNE PRESS LONDON UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA LIBRARY BERKELEY Return to desk from which borrowed. This book is DUE on the last date stamped below. PEB 4 1948 24Feb'58RHf REC'D LD FEB 10 1958 J vCiO **1 ^tB'n'^^^'^ LD 21-100m-9,'47(A5702sl6)476 YB 0534 297568 LC 3 7 UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA LIBRARY lii i !illlil(!l;liiii: [i -iiiiiiiilr..; liilli