!-■ -jvjoi) im s \ ^IVERSITV o •o THE UNIVERStTV Up B < o SANTA BARBARA a^f m O AilSXJAINn 3Hi c 2 < m / o AUS)13AINrt 3H1 jr 1 iiLii./coeivt. C z 5 o o THE -l_, , -1 I <- *li',a1AlNn 3H1 t> IME IIBRARV Of o 3 o VSVBdVB VINVS o OF CAIIFORNIA VINSOJllVD JO o AllSHjAINn 3Hl jO Aiivitan 3Hi ^ Vi\>> HERSELF BY THE SAME AUTHOR HIMSELF Talks with Men Concerning Themselvci $1.25 PREPARING FOR WOMANHOOD $1.25 THE WOMAN OF FORTY $1.25 CONFIDENCES Talks with a Young Girl Concerning Herself 60 cts. TRUTHS Talks with a Boy Concerning Himself 60 cts. FALSE MODESTY 60 cts. TEACHING SEX HYGIENE 60 cts. THE HOME NURSE $1.25 YOUR BABY A Guide for Mothers $1.25 ^HERSELF / TALKS WITH WOMEN CONCERNING THEMSELVES BY E. B. LOWRY, M.D. Author of "Confidences," "Truths." etc. CHICAGO FORBES & COMPANY Made In U. S. A. Copyright, 1911» By Forbes and Company PREFACE A RECENT number of the Journal of the Ameri- can Medical Association contained this para- graph : *' A correspondent asks for a good book de- scribing the female generative organs anatom- ically, physiologically and pathologically, treating also of childbirth, written in language easily understood by a layman. He desires to give copies to some of his young women patients. The editor regrets there is no satisfactory book on the subject although there is great need for one." It is a lamentable fact that the majority of women and girls are ignorant of the structure of their most important organs. In the majority of schools and colleges where physiology is taught, absolutely nothing is mentioned about the repro- ductive organs. As far as books or instruction 1 concerned, the girl is ignorant of their very Aistencc. If she knew something of the struc- 5 PREFACE ture of such Important organs and the harmful results of many practices or acts of carelessness affecting them, would she not be better prepared to take the proper care of herself and more liable to develop into a strong, healthy woman? If a girl In the business world is intrusted with a delicate piece of machinery she is taught the structure, use and care of it. Why is it not just as necessary that the girl, who is intrusted with the care of delicate organisms upon whose condition depends the health of the future generation, be instructed regarding the care of these organs ? In- stead, she is left in absolute ignorance and then blamed if she mars them. Every woman should have some knowledge of the structure and care of her body, especially of those parts which are concerned so intimately ii> the welfare of the future generation. Every woman, too, should receive some Instruction re- garding the care of young children and the proper management of the home. A woman who at- tempts to care for herself and her children with- out proper knowledge of these subjects is like a man who tries to run his business blindfolded. That thinking women are awakening to the fact 6 PREFACE that they hare been suffering unnecessarily and arc realizing the necessity for more knowledge con- cerning the hygiene and physiology of their own bodies is shown by the fact that nearly every chap- ter in this book has been written in answer to questions asked by women readers of the author's magazine articles. With the hope that the plain facts herein set forth will aid some women to have healthier and happier lives and healthier and hap- pier babies this series of talks has been written. CONTENTS CHAPTER I n III IV V VI VII VIII IX X XI XII XIII XIV XV XVI XVII XVIII XIX XX XXI xxir PAGE Anatomy and Physiology of the Female Or- gans II Menstruation — Puberty — Menopause ... 23 Diseases of the Female Organs 33 Gjnstipation — Hemorrhoids 47 The Black Plagues SS Fake Medical Advice for Women 65 The Marriage Relation 71 Embryology 81 Abortions 89 Maternal Impressions — Heredity .... 97 Childless Homes and Real Homes .... 103 Prevention of Pregnancy 109 Some of the Causes of Divorce 115 The Need of Early Instruction of Girls . . 121 Why Girls Go Astray 131 Self-Abuse I37 Effects of Immoral Life I49 Furtations \vv their Results i57 White Slavery 163 The Need of Early Instruction of Boys . .171 Why Boys Go Astray I77 How Shall the Child be Told 183 9 CONTENTS CHAPTKK fACE XXIII Women In Business 189 XXIV Nervousness — A Lack of Control .... 195 XXV A Woman Is As Young As She Wants To Be 203 10 HERSELF CHAPTER I ANATOMY AND PHYSIOLOGY OF THE FEMALE ORGANS Before we can understand the care of any- thing we must have some knowledge of its structure; so I think it well, in this our first talk, that we should learn something of the structure of the /emale generative organs. As I have told some of you in former talks, the womb is designed as a nest for the babe during Its process of de- velopment from the egg or ovule. It lies in the center of the pelvis, or lower part of the body cavity, In front of the rectum and behind and above the bladder. It is pear-shaped, with the small end downward, and is about three inches long, two Inches wide and one inch thick. It con- sists of layers of muscles enclosing a cavity which, II Ill CO I- z <^ Q. O if U QQ D I- Q. o 12 ANATOMY AND PHYSIOLOGY owing to the thickness of the walls, is compara- tively small. This cavity is triangular in shape and has three openings, — one at the lower end or mouth of the womb into the vagina and one at each side, near the top, into the fallopian tubes. The womb, or uterus as it sometimes is called, is not firmly attached nor adherent to any of the bony parts. It is suspended in the pelvic cavity and kept in place by muscles and ligaments. As the muscles and ligaments are elastic, the womb slightly changes its position with different move- ments of the body. Normally, it is inclined for- ward, resting on the bladder; so you sec, a full bladder will push it backward, while a full rectum and intestines tend to push it forward and down- ward. The lower end or mouth of the womb opens into the vagina, a distensible and curved muscular tube, which helps to support the womb and also connects it with the external parts. The vagina is about three and a half inches long. It often is called the birth canal because the baby must pass through it on its way from the womb to the ex- ternal world. The two upper openings of the womb lead into 13 HERSELF the fallopian tubes or oviducts, which arc two small muscular tubes leading from the ovaries to the womb. Each one is about four inches long, but the opening through the center in its largest portion is only about as large as a broom straw, while near the womb it narrows down until it will admit only a fine bristle. When the ovum or seed leaves the ovary it must pass through one of these tubes to reach the womb, so you see how necessary it is that they be kept in good condition. From the end of each tube, but not directly connected with it, is suspended a small almond- shaped body called the ovary. Each ovary is similar in shape and size to an almond, measuring about one and a half inches in length, three- fourths of an inch in width and one-half an inch in thickness. The function or work of the ovaries is to produce, develop and mature the ova (eggs) ' and to discharge them when fully formed so they may enter the tubes and so find their way to the womb. In every ovary there arc several hundred little ovules or eggs in various stages of develop- ment. At IrrcguUr Intervals one of these ovules ripens and leaves the ovary. It passes along the fallopian tube to the womb. Here it remains if 14 1. Bladder 2. Urethra 3. Uterus 4. Vagina 5. Rectum 6. Peritoneum 7. Perineum VERTICAL SECTION OF PELVIS 15 HERSELF it is impregnated or fertilized, and develops Into the babe. If not impregnated, it passes off with the menstrual flow. Every twenty-eight days large quantities of blood are sent to the womb, producing a natural congestion. The pressure of this extra blood in the tiny capillaries of the womb stretches and weakens their walls. This al- lows the blood, which is being sent to the womb to provide nourishment for the ovum if it be im- pregnated, to pass into the cavity of the womb, then out through the mouth into the vagina, thence to the external parts. This flow is called the menstrual flow. When the flow ceases the mucosa or lining assumes its former state. This process is repeated every m^nth. Lining the cavity of the abdomen and also folded over the womb, ovaries, tubes and other organs is a thin membrane called the peritoneum. An inflammation of this lining is called peritoni- tis. All these organs I have mentioned are situated inside the body out of sight, but there are other organs that are external. You have noticed two longitudinal folds of skin extending from the anus, or external opening of the rectum, to the i6 ANATOMY AND PHYSIOLOGY rounded eminence in front. Their outer surface is covered with hair and their inner surface with glands that secrete a lubricating material. These folds are called the labia majora. Within the labia majora are two smaller folds called the labia minora. These folds meet at their anterior (front) end. At the meeting point you will notice a very small structure which is called the clitoris. This clitoris is very similar in structure to the penis of the male, having a tiny prepuce or foreskin which folds over to protect the sensi- tive end. Sometimes the foreskin is bound down too tightly, so that instead of being a protection to the parts, it becomes a source of irritation. Then we say the clitoris is hooded and it is neces- sary to loosen or cut this fold of skin. The opera- tion is similar to that of circumcision in the male. Just back of the clitoris, within the folds of the labia, is situated the meatus urinarius, or opening leading to the bladder. This aperture does not open directly into the bladder but is connected to it by a tube, about an inch and a half long, called the urethra. The orifice or external opening of the vagina is situated just back of the meatus urinarius, also 17 HERSELF within the folds of the labia. In the virgin it is partly closed by a membranous fold called the hymen or maidenhead. The shape and size of the hymen varies greatly in different individuals, sometimes being entirely absent. After marriage it usually persists as notched folds. The presence of an intact hymen is not necessarily a sign of virginity, nor does its absence necessarily indicate defloration. Its congenital absence or absence at the time of birth is known. It sometimes is in- jured, or may be destroyed by an accident, as by falling astride of an object; again violent exercise may rupture It (horseback riding). Surgical operations or vaginal examinations, roughly con- ducted, not infrequently cause rupture. Then, too, authentic cases are on record in which prosti- tutes have had perfectly preserved hymens. It is yj well known that the use of vaginal astringents may tone up and narrow the vagina and even restore the hymen to a great degree. The surface between the vaginal orifice and the anus is called the perineum (Do not confuse this with the peritoneum, for they are entirely different). It is this perineum that sometimes be- comes torn during childbirth. The vaginal open- l8 ANATOMY AND PHYSIOLOGY ing does not always stretch sufficiently to allow the passage of the child's head and the great pressure being exerted on the child by the uterine and abdominal muscles pushes it through, causing the tear. (You will understand this better when I explain about the development and birth of the child.) If this tear is repaired immediately no inconvenience usually results but if it is neglected it may produce a series of complications, some of which are falling of the womb, inflammation and even sterility. Not directly connected with any of the other organs but still associated with them are the breasts. They vary in size at different periods of life, being usually of small size when the girl is young but increasing in size as the generative organs develop. The breasts consist of fatty tissue surrounding milk glands and ducts. Dur- ing pregnancy they increase in size and become filled with milk. After the menopause (change of life) they ordinarily shrink in size. The an- cient Greek statues, such as the Venus de Medici, long regarded as a type of perfect beauty, the Venus of Capua, regarded as the bust of a perfect form, show that the Grecian ideal of the feminine 19 HERSELF form had small busts. The modern idea seems to have wandered far from the Grecian ideal and many women devote much time and money trying to develop their busts. Perhaps sometime wc will give up trying to be so artificial and conform to Nature's ideal. Nature has constructed the internal female organs so wisely that we seldom need give them much thought. But the external organs do need our attention every day. I told you that the labia secreted a lubricating material which kept the parts moist, but this secretion must not be allowed to accumulate. The scalp secretes an oil that is necessary to the health of the hair but if this and the perspiration are allowed to accumulate the hair has an offensive odor. So it is with the female organs, the parts must be bathed carefully every day. I have been surprised in the past to find how many intelligent women neglect these parts. Women come for an examination, their clothing is scrupulously clean, their bodies show recent care but in the folds of the labia, especially near the clitoris, I find an accumulation of a chccsy-likc material which has an odor very offensive to any 20 ANATOMY AND PHYSIOLOGY truly refined woman. Sometimes in public gath- erings, I have been seated near a woman with this same offensive odor very noticeable, and I have longed to tell her how to avoid it, for I am sure others must notice the same odor. But even from a physician, in the privacy of the office, women resent any suggestion that they are not thorough in matters of cleanliness. Daily cleansing of these parts is a necessity. At least once a day these parts should be sponged carefully. The labia should be separated and every fold thoroughly cleansed. Occasional vaginal douches also are necessary, for the various secretions often are re- tained in the folds of the vagina and cause irrita- tion. But in taking a douche one always should remember to have the water warm. Cold water may produce congestion. The virtue of douches (except when taken for medicinal purposes) lies in their cleansing properties and warm water cleanses even better than cold. Many women produce grave disorders by the use of cold douches under the mistaken notion that they are of greater value than hot ones. A douche should be taken at the close of the menstrual period especially. 21 HERSELF These female organs should not be the source of worry but they do require as much or even more attention to cleanliness than we give to our mouths or other parts of the body. 22 CHAPTER II MENSTRUATION PUBERTY MENOPAUSE The subject of menstruation seems to be trou- bling several of you. I am sorry that you did not all have the advantage of having this explained at an early age. You might have been saved a great deal of suffering and causeless worry. By menstruation, or " the monthlies " as it sometimes is called, is meant the monthly hem- orrhage that takes place in the uterus or womb during the child-bearing period of the normal woman except during pregnancy and lactation, when it near y always is suspended. The child- bearing period commences at the age of puberty and ends with the menopause (change of life). Puberty is the period of maturing of the sexual organs. It occurs about the age of twelve, al- though there mav be considerable variation as to diis- It extends over a period of several years. As a rule, girls mature earlier in warm climates 23 HERSELF than in cold and in cities than in country districts. The signs of the approach of this period arc the growth of hair on the pubes and other parts of the body, the enlargement of the breasts, a gen- eral rounding and increased grace of the body, the development of the pelvis so that the hips be- come more prominent, and a change in the mental qualities of the child, the girl naturally becoming more retiring. The menstrual function usually is not established at once, there being premonitory symptoms of a vague nature. There may be, at first, only a slight discharge of mucus tinged with blood, later the normal menstrual flow will be established. During this period of puberty there arc great changes taking place in the girl's internal organs. This change and development requires consider- able of the girl's strength and natur illy influences her nervous system. It is for this reason that a girl at this period of her life should not be sub- jected to any great exertion, either physical or mental. She should have plenty of light, health- ful exercise in the open air, but should not indulge in any very violent exercise. A little care at this time often will save her years of suffering. As 24 MENSTRUATION the nervous system is greatly affected at this period there should be no great mental strain. In fact, if the girl shows many nervous symptoms, it may be wise to take her out of school for a year so that her strength may be used as Nature re- quires it. As a rule, too much work is required in school at this age. The school duties should be lessened and the girl allowed to rest a day or two during her menstrual period. The girl at this age should not attempt to accomplish as much work or study as the boy does. Her time at this period might better be occupied in learning the rudiments of housekeeping and home-making. Then, when her body has become developed, her strength can be spared and can be well used in the development of her mind. If the nervous strain too common at this age could be relieved we would have fewer nervous women and a healthier and happier posterity. As puberty approaches, a mother should give her daughter adequate information so that she should not be frightened at the first appearance of the menstrual flow, nor take any risks at this pe- riod. Menstruation is the sign of the possibility of motherhood. If properly taught this fact, 25 HERSELF every girl will be glad she menstruates and will want to be careful during the period. On account of lack of early instruction, many a girl obtains wrong ideas regarding this function and it pro- duces in her a feeling of repugnance. She should be taught the reasons for observing prudence during the menstrual period. The possible life- long invalidism that may result should be pointed out. A woman owes it to herself to take good care of herself during her menstrual periods. For two or three days at least she should avoid any unnecessary strain, He down and rest as much as possible and not worry over school or other duties. Especial attention should be paid to cleanliness durinp- this period. A sponge bath taken in a warm room is not injurious and unpleasant odors can be avoided by sponging the parts with a warm antiseptic solution upon changing the cloth. Ev- ery woman should be provided with a circular gir- dle cut upon the bias so it may be elastic, and pro- vided with tabs to which to pin the folded cloth. She also should have a supply of sanitary cloths made of absorbent cotton-fabric, or pads made of absorbent cotton enclosed in gauze. The latter es- pecially arc convenient for the girl who is obliged 26 MENSTRUATION to room away from home, for they may be burned and the cost of new ones is no greater than the laundry of cloths. These pads or cloths should be changed at least twice a day. It also is necessary that one should bathe the parts in warm water with each change, as unpleasant odors can thereby be avoided. At the close of each period she should take a bath and change all clothing. One cannot be too careful about these matters so essen- tial to cleanliness. It is surprising how many women neglect these important matters. The er- roneous idea that bathing of any sort at this time may have disastrous results accounts for much of this neglect. If proper care is taken warm sponge baths cannot be injurious. A woman in normal health should not suffer at the menstrual period. She normally will have a feeling of lassitude and disinclination for any great mental or physical work, perhaps accompanied by a slight feeling of uneasiness in the pelvic region. Because so many women do suffer at these periods it often is considered as " natural " and allowed to continue. The phenomena often noted at the menstrual period arc, — pains in various parts of the body, 27 HERSELF hot flashes, chilliness and various hysterical symp- toms. A few days before menstruation com- mences there may be various nervous symptoms, as irritability and a disinclination for any exertion. Dark circles often appear under the eyes and the breasts become enlarged and painful. A sense of fullness and oppression may be felt in the head. Any severe pain or profuse flow during the period or a discharge between periods indicates a weakened or diseased condition and should not be neglected, for it sooner or later will affect the whole system. A woman suffering from female diseases not only is unable to perform her work in a normal manner but the pale skin, dark circles under the eyes and drawn haggard look which accompany these conditions rob her of her charm of physical excellence. The menstrual flow appears, as a rule, every twenty-eight days, although the length of time varies with the individual. The average duration is five days, but varies from three to seven. The flow consists of blood from the uterine mucosa (lin- ing of the womb) together with small quantities of mucus. The color generally is dark at first while later it becomes more pale. Women in poor health 28 MENSTRUATION often have a pale discharge. There always Is a faint odor to the menstrual flow, which has been likened to the odor of marigolds. The quantity varies with the Individual. Usually fleshy girls flow more than thin ones and dark complexioned ones than light ones. The average quantity is four to six fluid ounces. The time between the periods Is required by the uterus or womb to first restore the lining and then prepare It for the reception of the ovum. Every month one or more ova (eggs) leave the ovary, pass to the uterus and, If not Impregnated, pass off with the menstrual flow. The material prepared for the reception of the ovum is used to nourish the new life if pregnancy occurs, but when it does not, this surplus passes off in the form of the menstrual flow. The menopause or change of life Is the end of the child-bearing period of a woman's life. The average age at which it occurs is forty-six, although there Is a great difference as to this. In some women It has been known to occur as early as the thirtieth year, while in others It does not come until the fifty-fifth year. As a rule, a woman who commences to menstruate at an early age continues to do so until a late age, while with a woman who 29 HERSELF commences to menstruate late, the change comes early. At this period of a woman's life, there arc numerous changes taking place in the body. The ovaries and uterus atrophy or shrink in size, and cease to functionate. The nervous system is being readjusted to meet the changed conditions. One symptom of the approach of this period is irregularity in menstruation; sometimes several periods are missed, then the menstrual flow ap- pears normally for several months and then disap- pears again. Often the woman complains of hot flashes, cramps in the limbs and other parts of the body. These arc caused by the attempts to re- adjust the nervous system to the altered conditions. A great many women worry unnecessarily, for there is no especial danger at this time unless the body has been neglected previously and a diseased condition is present. But the body needs a little extra care, just as it did at puberty. So many women break down their health by worrying at this period over what might happen. The best plan for every woman, as soon as she perceives the ap- proach of this period, is to go to a reliable physi- cian and have a thorough examination. Then if there arc any neglected tears or chronic inflamma- 30 MENSTRUATION tions they can be corrected and danger removed. If a person were to cross a deep lake and had any doubts regarding the worthiness of the vessel pro- vided for his use, he would be very foolish if he did not have a trained boat-builder examine his vessel and repair any weak places. It is just as important for a woman about to cross this period of her life to go to a trained repairer of bodies and have him correct any weak places. The various changes taking place consume S(\ much of the woman's strength that she requires an extra amount of rest and cannot use up as much energy in working as at other periods of her life. The ordinary woman does not realize the need of extra rest during this period and so continues her usual work. Then the extra drain on her nervou** system shows itself in various forms. The dis- turbances sometimes are productive of so much discomfort and so often are exaggerated beyond physiological limits that the patient is impelled to seek relief and often requires a physician's atten- tion. Puberty or the period of development ex- tends over several years, so the menopause or period of atrophy extends over a period of from three to five years. If a woman relaxes and allows 31 HERSELF the changes to proceed naturally she need have no cause to worry, but she must remember that rest from continual strain Is necessary during this period. Freedom from care, relaxation of phys- ical and mental effort, regular periods of complete rest once or twice a day, a reduction of the diet and regulation of the bowels should be the first principles of treatment. Then — do not worry but occupy the mind with happy thoughts. 3^ CHAPTER III DISEASES OF THE FEMALE ORGANS So much of the suffering among women Is un- necessary, being due to the neglect of the little things, so much ill health can be relieved by at- tention to a few simple hygienic measures, that I think it wise to describe some of the most common disorders of the female organs, and to explain their symptoms so that you would not ignorantly neglect them, if you should be so unfortunate as to contract any. The most common diseases of the female or- gans may be classed as displacements, inflamma- tions and tumors. On account of its lack of strong attachment, the womb is very easily displaced. When from any cause the womb is congested and heavy the extra weight stretches the supporting muscles and ligaments, which then allow it to fall out of place. It also may be displaced by a sudden fall, by 33 HERSELF jumping or other strenuous exercise. As the womb normally is heavier at the menstrual period than at any other time and as there is a natural congestion then, it is more easily displaced at that time than during any other part of the month. This is one reason why one should be careful not to take strenuous exercise at the menstrual period. The most common displacement, or the most common way for the womb to tip, is backwards and at the same time it usually falls downward. You remember, the rectum is directly back of the womb, so, if the womb is tipped backwards, it presses against the rectum. This tends to pre- vent the feces, or bowel movement, from passing out naturally and helps to produce constipation. The womb, pressing against the rectum, also presses on the blood vessels which are very numer- ous there. This pressure on the blood vessels prevents the blood from leaving them. If it is held there, it causes the blood vessels to dilate in order to be large enough to contain it. We call this enlarged portion of the vein a blood tumor. These tumors or dilated blood vessels of the rec- tum arc called hemorrhoids or piles. I will ex- 34 DISEASES OF THE ORGANS plain these more thoroughly when I talk to you about constipation. The womb may tip forward, pressing on the bladder and causing a frequent desire to urinate. More rarely it is tipped to one side. It then tends to pull on the ovaries and produce pain and various nervous symptoms. The womb may fall downward, pressing against both the bladder and rectum and dragging the ovaries and tubes out of their natural positions. Sometimes it even protrudes from the vagina. Any falling or displacement of the womb pulls on the tubes and ovaries, often producing an inflam- mation. This inflammation should not be al- lowed to continue, as it may become serious, even extending to the peritoneum and producing peri- tonitis. The nerves of the uterus are very closely connected with the spinal nerves, therefore, any displacement reacts through them and may pro- duce headache and backache, which are the com- mon accompaniments of any uterine disorder. One of the most simple and yet efficacious treatments to correct a displacement downward and backward is to assume the knee-chest position for a few moments morning and evening after the 35 36 DISEASES OF THE ORGANS clothing has been remo7cd. In the knee-chest po- sition, the patient kneels on the bed, then bends forward until her chest touches the bed; the back slopes down and the thighs should be at right angles with the bed. This position allows the various organs to fall forward and toward the up- ncr part of the body, the pressure on the uterus 29 relieved and it assumes its natural position. This treatment, persisted in, will relieve nearly every case which has not some other disorder con- nected with it. If every woman would assume this position for a few minutes once or twice a week, just before retiring, she would be greatly benefited; for the majority of women have a slight falling of the womb, which then presses on the rectal and other nerves causing various nervous symptoms. The womb and ovaries are surrounded by a dense network of nerves and blood vessels, mak- ing them very liable to congestion. Tight cloth- ing or improperly fitted clothing causes pressure and interferes with the circulation. I believe that a large percentage of the objections to the corset originated from women wearing improperly fitted corsets which pushed the organs out of place. A 37 HERSELF corset fitted to the wearer is not injurious and serves as a support. Overwork, catching cold and excesses may produce a congestion which is one stage of inflammation. The most common symptoms of inflammation of the womb are pain in the pelvic region, a dull backache, especially across the hips, and a vaginal discharge called leucor rhoea (whites). Any leucorrhoea shows a dr ordered condition which should be corrected. It may be simply of a catarrhal nature, due to pres- sure or coldj or it may indicate a more serious condition, as the presence of one of the black plagues. Whenever a woman notices a vaginal discharge, it is a wise plan to go at once to a re- liable physician, find out what is the cause and nature and then take measures to correct it. In the beginning a very little treatment, such as hot douches, may be all that is required, while if un- treated the condition may become serious, as you will understand when I explain about the black plagues. Any disorder of the uterus or ovaries reacts through the nerves upon other parts of the body and may produce various symptoms such as general weakness, headaches and backaches. 38 DISEASES OF THE ORGANS This drain on the system often is shown by dark circles under the eyes, pale skin and a drawn, hag- gard expression. All these tend to rob a woman of her charm of physical excellence, and none of us wish to lose that; for it is natural for all women to wish to appear attractive. One of the most common of the so-called female disorders, which seems to be the lot of the majority of women, is dysmenorrhoea or painful menstruation. This is not a disease in itself, but the symptom of various disorders. A woman in normal health should not suffer at her menstrual period; so if she does suffer it shows there is some- thing wrong. The natural thing for anyone to do who had dysmenorrhoea would be first to find the cause of this pain and then take measures to correct it. It may be due to displacements, in- flammations or tumors; it may be due to a con- traction of the mouth of the womb which does not dilate sufficiently to allow the menstrual dis- charge to flow freely. It may be due to neuralgia or rheumatism of the uterus or ovaries. Pain always indicates an unnatural condition. It is the cry of tortured nerves. The cause should be de- termined by a competent physician and then 39 HERSELF measures taken immediately to restore the normal condition. One who suffers from dysmenorrhoea should try to plan her work, so that she may rest the first day of her menstrual period, and, if possible, the pre- ceding day. Absolute rest in bed at this time is beneficial. A hot sitz bath, hot foot bath or hot vaginal douche taken just previous to the com- mencement of the period will aid in relieving the congestion and thus lessen the pain. After the flow has started hot foot baths and hot applica- tions to the abdomen may be used. Hot drinks also may be taken, but one should not get in the habit of using any drug at this time. Hot ginger tea will do as much good as one prepared with some habit-forming drug. Many of the remedies advertised as a cure for this condition are com- posed chiefly of alcohol, and, although they may give a temporary relief, the benefit is not perma- nent. Careful attention to diet and exercise, with regular hours of sleep, are essential points to be considered if one would be free from this dis- agreeable trouble. Another symptom which often causes much alarm to the patient is amenorrhoea or deficient or 40 DISEASES OF THE ORGANS scanty menstruation. This may result from fear, worry, catching cold or to an enlargement of the womb. It also is one of the first symptoms of pregnancy. Sometimes it indicates an impover- ished condition of the blood and shows the need of a general building up of the system. This is true especially in young girls who have what is called chlorosis or green sickness. These girls are pale, weak, sometimes having a greenish cast to their complexions. They need good care and nourish- ing food and plenty of light, out-door exercise. In young girls I sometimes find an irritation of the vagina which causes pain. This may be due to the retenf'on of secretions in the vagina. The general idea that only married women have leucor- rhoea, or whites, is fallacious. Virgins may have it. The u'ual cause is catching cold at the menstrual period. Another delusion is that these girls should not take douches for fear they might injure the hymen. This is erroneous, for douches are neces■^ary in the treatment of this condition and, except in very rare cases, a douche can be taken vith an especially small douche point with- out injury to the parts. There normally must be a small opening in the hymen to permit the pas- 41 HERSELF sage of the menstrual flow. If a small douche point is used no harm will result. When I talked to you about the structure of the external generative organs, I mentioned the clitoris and explained that sometimes the prepuce or foreskin is bound down, or is too tight, so that the natural secretions are retained under it and produce an irritation; that the operation for the unhooding of the clitoris is very similiar to that of circumcision in the male and is per- formed for similar causes. Many a woman who has been nervous all her life, owes her condition to a hooded clitoris, which a very simple opera- tion would correct. A hooded clitoris also may have something to do with the immoral life of some girls. The other day I received a letter from an aged physician who, in discussing the tendency to immoral practices, says: "You say in one of your articles, 'What is the remedy? Educate!' Well, perhaps, but if you would let me circumcise the girl early in life, I believe it would be more certain." There is considerable truth in his statement. A hooded clitoris pro- duces a constant irritation which tends to lead to habits of self-abuse and perhaps immorality. 42 DISEASES OF THE ORGANS The other common disorder which I named at first is a tumor. Tumors are any unnatural growth. They may form in any part of the body, but just now we will speak only of those affect- ing the internal female organs. Tumors may form in the cavity of the womb, in its walls or on the outside of it. The common symptoms are an en- largement of the abdomen accompanied usually by pain due to pressure on the nerves. There also may be some hemorrhage at other than the regular menstrual periods. Sometimes the ovaries are diseased and become enlarged, tender and filled with fluid. Then they are spoken of as cystic tumors or as cysts. The tubes may become inflamed and filled with pus. The most common cause of these pus tubes is one of the black plagues. With all these tumors the treatment usually Is to remove the tumor and sometimes the entire organ. In a few cases it Is possible that the fluid or other contents of the tumor may be absorbed. If the general health and circulation are improved. In some cases we find what is called a phantom tumor. There really is no tumor, although the symptoms may be such that even reliable physicians are misled. The symp- 43 HERSELF toms are due to a nervous condition. These phan' torn tumors have given many a quack a reputation for removing tumors without the use of the knife. A carcinoma or cancer is a malignant tumor, that is, one that tends to grow worse and to re- appear if it apparently is removed. The reap- pearance may be in the same place or in an en- tirely different portion of the body. Cancer of the uterus is not uncommon in women. It fre- quently follows neglect of some injury. For ex- ample, it will appear on the site of an unrepaired tear. It most commonly comes after the meno- pause. The change that is undergone at that time seems to stir things up and bring to light any neg- lected injury. This is another reason why every woman at the menopause should undergo a thorough examination and have any defect re- paired, thus avoiding much of the possibility of trouble. A frequent symptom of carcinoma of the uterus Is hemorrhage at Irregular times after the menopause. Any woman who has such a con- dition would be wise if she immediately repaired to a physician and determined the cause of the hemorrhage. In the beginning it is possible to re- move a cancer, but later it becomes so involved in 44 DISEASES OF THE ORGANS the surrounding structures that its removal is im- possible. You may think I am trying to increase business for the physicians but in reality my advice, if taken, would lessen their practice. It is another applica- tion of *' a stitch in time saves nine." In the be- ginning almost all these diseases can be corrected with very little trouble, while if neglected the proc- ess is much slower. The probabilities are that the doctor will have the case later, if not con- sulted early, but instead of a few office treatments he will have an expensive operation. So, you see, I really am trying to save you doctors' bills when I urge early and thorough examinations. There is a peculiar thing about the human race. A machine will get out of order and the owner will send for an expert machinist to repair it — not attempting to patch it up himself. But when these bodies of ours, the most wonderful and com- plicated of machines, get out of repair we try to patch them up ourselves or try various remedies recommended by those who know worse than noth- ing about the physical machinery. Then we think we are saving doctors' bills, when at the same time we are spending twice as much on question- 45 HERSELF able repairs — patent medicines, which often do more harm than good. Frequently they contain stimulants which produce a mythical improvement but leave the system worse off than before. 46 CHAPTER IV CONSTIPATION HEMORRHOIDS A REGULAR dally movement of the bowels is necessary to health. Much of the illness in the world might have been avoided if the victims had taken better care of the excretory organs. One of the first questions a physician asks a patient is, " How are your bowels, do they move regu- larly every day? " In some cases that is the first time the patient has thought of them, and he has to think some time before he can remember just when and how often his bowels did move. Then perhaps he is not sure. In a great many cases it is a routine practice with physicians to give a " good cleaning out," that is, to give a thorough laxative. Many times this is all the treatment re- quired and in other cases it only is combined with a little intestinal antiseptic to further carry out the cleaning process. The most common cause of constipation Is Ir- 47 HERSELF regularity in going to the toilet. When the de- sire for defecation comes, we are too busy and postpone it until some more convenient time, which time may be too late. Nature is the best judge as to when the bowels are ready to be emptied. If we do not obey her call, we must take the conse- quences. When the waste material is ready to be voided, It is in a semi-fluid state, but, if It remains in the intestines too long the water Is absorbed and the waste material Is left in a hard mass which is expelled with difficulty. Not only that, but the desire to expel It soon passes. Nature, finding we do not respond to her call, ceases to notify us. If the waste material Is allowed to remain In the bowels, not only the water Is absorbed but with it some of the poisons from the waste material, which are taken up by the blood and car- ried to all parts of the system, causing a great deal of trouble and pain. This absorption of toxins (poisons) causes headache, loss of ap- petite, a sense of depression and a lack of energy. The pressure of the hard material on the tender tissues of the rectum causes hemorrhoids or piles, by irritating the tissues and causing a congestion. Hemorrhoids are enlarged veins which have been 48 CONSTIPATION — HEMORRHOIDS so irritated and filled with extra blood that they have lost their power to contract. These enlarged veins may remain inside the rectum and then arc known as internal piles. Sometimes they pro- trude externally and then are known as external piles. Frequently they become tender and cause a great deal of pain. In some cases one of the lit- tle veins becomes so engorged with blood that it bursts and allows the contained blood to escape. This is known as bleeding piles. For mild cases of hemorrhoids (piles) the treatment is to correct the accompanying constipation, then take an enema or injection of warm water morning and evening, using the water as hot as can be borne and allow- ing it to run in and out the rectum for some time. Following this, an astringent and soothing lotion should be applied. Constipation may be caused by retroversion of the uterus. If the uterus is tipped backwards it presses on the rectum, preventing the passage of the feces (bowel movement). This pressure also causes hemorrhoids. In this case the treat- ment is to correct the displacement. In many cases all that is necessary is to take the knee-chest position for a few minutes night and morning. 49 HERSELF Always In the treatment of constipation, the first item is to discover the cause. We have noted that the chief cause is irregularity in going to the toilet, therefore, the first measure to be taken in the treatment is regularity in going to the toilet. Choose a convenient hour, usually right after breakfast, and always go to the toilet at that time no matter if there is a desire or not. At first there may be no natural movement but if you per- sist, your efforts will be rewarded. For the first few days it is well to take an enema of warm, soapy water at this time. Every day take exer- cise that will strengthen the muscles of the ab- domen. Bending forward and touching the toes with the fingers without bending the knees is one valuable exercise. This should be done ten or twelve times morning and evening. A daily brisk walk in the fresh air is another good exercise. Fruit or figs eaten with the meals or a glass of water taken before breakfast and upon retiring often proves very beneficial in relieving a tendency to constipation. There is an old saying, " An ap- ple or two before going to bed, and the doctor will go begging for his bread." This really is a 50 CONSTIPATION — HEMORRHOIDS practical Idea and more nearly true than many old sayings. Cathartics or laxatives should not be taken ex- cept for an occasional dose or during illness upon the advice of a physician. So common is the practice of taking daily laxatives that it has be- come a " national curse " I People do not realize that they are slaves to this habit, so they continue to take their daily doses of " teas " or " waters.'* In many cases a patient will tell his physician that his bowels are " all right," that they move every day. Further questionings reveal the fact that he Is In the habit of taking some laxative fre- quently. The bowels are not " all right " If any laxative is required. Massage of the abdomen usually is very bene- ficial in treating constipation. It acts by stimu- lating the muscles and should be given at set times in the day but never until two hours after any meal. The various vibrators act In the same manner as massage. In any massage of the abdomen the thighs should be flexed, as this relaxes the ab- dominal muscles. Enemas or injections of warm water may be 51 HERSELF taken occasionally and then are beneficial, but if long continued are injurious by reason of their irritating effect. At times, when the stomach and intestines have been over-loaded with irritating material, an enema is one of the quickest measures for relief. In obstinate constipation two or three ounces of warm olive oil injected slowly into the rectum at night and allowed to remain until morn- ing will soften the waste material so it can be evacuated easily in the morning. Constipation never should be neglected as it car- ries in its train a long line of disorders, as hemor- rhoids (piles), abscesses, and intestinal obstruc- tion. Indigestion and constipation frequently are bosom friends. How often indigestion is a result of nervous strain is perhaps seldom realized. A business man eats his lunch and other meals in a hurry, with his mind on his business. His ener- gies are being consumed by his brain and very little is left to be used in the digestion of his food. One never should eat when tired and nervous. Take a few moments' absolute rest before meals. If possible lie down and relax all muscles for a few moments. Then eat your meal slowly and if pos- 52 CONSTIPATION — HEMORRHOIDS sibic have some pleasant companion who will talk with you on subjects not connected with your busi- ness cares. You will be surprised to note the im- provement in your digestion and incidentally in your tendency to constipation. For tlie noon meal, office workers should eat only light and easily digested food. Eat your heaviest meal after the work for the day is finished and the blood which has been required by the brain can be spared to the stomach. People doing manual labor that requires physical strength need, and can digest, a heavy noonday meal but the requirements of the brain workers are quite different. Many girls break down on account of lack of sufficient nourishment. Coffee and rolls for break- fast, ice cream and rolls for lunch and a sandwich and coffee for dinner is not sufficient food for any working girl. And yet that is about the diet of hundreds of girls. Often it is impossible for her to provide more, for when a girl must pay for her board, room, clothes and laundry from her salary of five or six dollars a week, sufficient food be- comes an impossibility. Many girls actually are slowly starving on this account. When the 53 HERSELF wheels of progress make it possible for every working girl to have a comfortable home and sufficient nourishing food many of the social prob- lems will right themselves. 54 CHAPTER V THE BLACK PLAGUES I PROMISED to explain to you what I meant b} the black plagues. It is strange when anything is as widely spread as are these diseases that so tcw people know anything about them, or realize their importance. At one time epidemics of typhoid fever were regarded as a revelation of the wrath of God. Now we know they are due to careless- ness and lack of sanitation. It is the same with the sufferings of women. We used to think it was a dispensation of Providence if a woman were com- pelled to undergo an operation. Now we know It usually is due to someone's lack of care, to a desecration of Nature's teachings. I remember when I was quite young hearing mention made of a " bad disease." Concerning the nature of this disease I was ignorant but I gathered the idea that it was som.e terrible disease which was contracted only by the most depraved 55 HERSELr of mortals. How little I suspected its widely- spread distribution, and how little I dreamed that among my acquaintances might be any afflicted with these diseases ! nor did I dream of the danger of innocent contagion. Since then I have learned what these diseases were. Now we call them the black plagues, because, owing to the prejudice of the majority, we dare not use their correct names generally. I have no doubt you will be as sur- prised and shocked as I was at the things I am going to impart to you. By black plagues we mean the two diseases spoken of by physicians as the venereal diseases, because they usually are contracted during sexual intercourse. The most common of these diseases is gonor- rhoea, or clap, as it often is called by men. How common it is may be judged by a statement made by a professor to his class in the medical college that at least eighty per cent, of the men in the world have contracted it sometime during their lives. Even the most conservative give the esti- mate as sixty per cent. The prevalent idea common among men that it is no worse than a cold — a mere annoyance that THE BLACK PLAGUES all men must expect and endure sometime — is lamentable. The persistence of the disease In the deeper structures long after It outwardly Is cured leads to unexpected communication of It to women, among whom may be the young wife. As a re- sult she enters upon a period of ill-health that ultimately may compel the mutilation of her body by a surgical operation to save her life. Much of the surgery performed upon the female organs has been rendered necessary by disease contracted from the husband. A few little germs of this disease left on even the external organs may find their way up through the vagina to the uterus or womb. Here they may produce an Inflammation of the lining of the womb, causing severe pain and other symptoms, such as profuse discharge. The germs may go farther, or the Inflammation may extend from the uterus to the tubes. When we consider that the passage through the tubes Is only about as large as a broom straw, we see what serious trouble may re- sult. The tubes become enlarged and filled with pus. The opening from the tubes to the uterus becomes closed, so there Is no way for the pus to escape. The accumulation of pus or the products 57 HERSELF of septic inflammation stretch the walls of the tubes until the little nerves in the walls cry out in rebellion. The pain becomes so great and the re- flex symptoms are so aggravated that finally the woman resorts to the only relief, — an operation for the removal of the tubes. When we consider that the ovule, the human egg, must travel through these tubes to reach the uterus and, if they are destroyed, has no other way of reaching the womb and, if it cannot reach the womb and be impregnated, cannot develop into the babe, then we realize how this disease is dooming women to childless lives, — women whose natural instincts and desires cry out for mother- hood. When we consider the factors that pro- mote race suicide we must not forget this impor- tant one. Even though the woman refuses an operation, or in a case in which the inflammation is not so severe and is reduced until she is nearly free from pain, the result may be the same, for the tubes may remain closed permanently. The closure of the tubes is not the only result that may follow the course of this disease. The infection may extend into the peritoneal cavity causing peritonitis, which so often results in the 58 THE BLACK PLAGUES untimely death of the woman. Here let me say that not all cases of peritonitis or of inflammation of the womb, tubes or ovaries are due to this in- fection. There are other infections, other germs, that may produce similar results. These germs may reach the organs in various ways. Some- times the woman herself is to blame and some- times we can blame no one. Inflammation of these organs may result from pressure of clothing, colds, excitement, overwork, pregnancies, excesses or neglect. The inflammation may spread to these organs from an inflamed appendix or other neighboring organs. Supposing, though, following this disease the tubes are not entirely closed and the woman be- comes pregnant. There is still the danger that during labor the baby's eyes will become infected and may become permanently blind. It is esti- mated that seventy per cent, of the blindness in the world has this cause. How does this produce blindness? Some few germs of this disease have remained in the vagina or birth canal and as the baby passes along the canal they enter its eyes. They are so very strong and work so rapidly that they can cause total blindness within three days. 59 HERSELF This fact is so well known by physicians that at the present time all reliable physicians pay especial attention to the newborn baby's eyes, cleansing them with an antiseptic solution immediately after birth. This precaution doubtless has saved the eyes of thousands of babies. This is one of the reasons why it is dangerous to employ an unedu- cated person at the time of labor. Even though she may have assisted at hundreds of births yet often she is ignorant of the many dangers and of the precautions that should be taken in every case. Even adults may become blind from this infec- tion. The disease is carried to the eyes by polluted fingers or towels. In a few hours the eyes be- come inflamed, pus forms, and unless heroic measures are taken, the eyesight is soon destroyed. In female children the vagina may become in- fected through the use of tainted sponges, wash cloths, etc. An innocent girl may thus carelessly acquire the disease. For this reason, we see how necessary it is to caution girls never to use public towels or wash cloths that have been used by an- other person. Even in the home, every member of the family should have his exclusive towel and wash cloth. 60 THE BLACK PLAGUES The symptoms of gonorrhoea that often arc noted first are a profuse discharge from the vagina, usually creamy or yellowish in color. This dis- charge is of such a nature that frequently it ex- coriates the external parts so that they become very tender and inflamed. Backache, especially across the hips, Is a common accompaniment of this disease. There may be general soreness in the pelvic region. If a woman suspects she has contracted this disease, she should go immediately to some reliable physician; for at first the disease may affect only the vagina but, if neglected, may extend to the uterus and tubes. In its early stages it may be cured by prompt treatment, but the majority of women postpone treatment until it Is too late. The other loathsome disease, syphilis. Infects the blood and therefore all parts of the body. "While under proper treatment it is not dangerous to life in the earlier years, yet the possibilities of conveying the contagion are numerous. In :he second stage, which lasts for a number of weeks, the mucous patches in the mouth are a source of danger. In this stage the disease may be con- veyed by a kiss or through the medium of the 6i HERSELF public drinking cup, towel, or anything that comes in contact with the virus. It may be contracted by a babe from a wet-nurse or the nurse may con- tract it from the babe. The most serious results of this disease appear years after its initial appearance, when the indi- vidual has been lulled into a false sense of security by long freedom from its outward symptoms. Many of the obscure cases of stomach or nerve trouble may be traced to this disease. The re- sults not only affect the man, but, should he marry and have children, his innocent babes may come into the world with an Inherited taint. These children seldom live to reach adult life and their lives usually are burdensome and full of misery. They may be deformed or be continually afflicted with ulcers or other horrible manifestations of the disease. I will explain this more thoroughly when I speak of heredity. Many of the disastrous effects of these diseases might have been prevented if they had been properly treated In their early stages. Ignorance as to the nature and probable disastrous effects, if neglected, prevents many a person from procuring proper treatment. It is a common practice among 62 THE BLACK PLAGUES men afFiIcted with these diseases to try various remedies recommended by their friends or by the druggist. It Is strange that a person who would not think of trying to treat himself for smallpox or other contagious disease will do so with thes« diseases. With women, the cause of their neglect is a failure to realize the Importance of the symp- toms. Unfortunately women have grown to think that various female ills are their lot In life which must be endured and regarded as a dispensa- tion of Providence instead of being ^considered an error in living that must be corrected the same as any other disease. Some commence treatment but neglect It as soon as the noticeable symptoms have disappeared. It generally is considered among physicians that the treatment of syphilis should be continued for at least three years after contracting the disease in order to remove all traces from the blood. It is a deplorable fact that the prevalence of these diseases might have been prevented by proper instruction of young boys. No man ever willfully contracted one of these diseases. Statis- tics tell us that the majority of victims contract them before their twentieth year, before the boy 63 HERSELF has learned anything of their dangers or perhaps of their existence. If these patients received the right treatment immediately and continued it until the disease had been eradicated the results would have been less serious. Here, too, lack of early and proper instruction is shown; for these imma- ture boys do not realize the necessity for prompt and wise treatment, or are misled by unscrupulous persons. I shall talk to you again on this subject, for many of you will have sons and you must know the dangers that beset them, so they can be prepared. 64 CHAPTER VI FAKE MEDICAL ADVICE FOR WOMEN One young lady wrote me, " Recently 1 lead that imperfectly developed ovaries might be a reason why some women do not have children. I have the symptoms which the article said indicated imperfect development. Does this necessarily mean that I never can have a baby? I seem to be healthy. I am twenty-one years old. I was to have been married In three months but now I do not know what to do. * My boy ' loves children as I do. It seems as though I cannot give bim up, yet it surely is not honorable to marry him if I find that I never will have a little one, without telling him. Please tell me what to do." The probabilities are that this girl's ovaries arc perfectly normal and that the article mentioned was an advertisement of some medical house which, by misleading statements, endeavors to in- duce women to take their treatment. There are 65 HERSELF many women who suffer a great deal mentally, and this in turn reflects on their physical health because of just such articles. It has been said that we are a nation of dupes and the advertisements carried in some of the papers would indicate the truth of this statement. No manufacturer is going to advertise anything that does not sell well and bring a considerable profit. Men are not so altruistic as to be in busi- ness just for the good of humanity. The majority are in business for the money to be obtained from it. Somehow, women are very susceptible to the arts of these greedy manufacturers. A company commences to make a patent medicine and then, in order to derive any profits from the investment, large quantities of the preparation must be sold. In order to accomplish this they must convince pos- sible buyers of their need of this particular treat- ment. The company employs an agent to write an advertisement, perhaps in the shape of an arti- cle purporting to be written by someone much in- terested in the human race. This advertisement or article describes some disease which may be cured by this one remedy. As there might not be enough people who know they have this given dis- 66 FAKE MEDICAL ADVICE ease to make a profit for the manufacturer, it becomes his business to convince others that they have this disease. Therefore, he proceeds to enumerate a great many symptoms which he says indicate this disease. Perhaps they might! But they are just as hkely to indicate any one of half a dozen other things. He details enough symp- toms so that some are recognized by nearly every woman as relating to her condition, so she jumps to the conclusion that she has that certain disease and buys a bottle of the medicine. If you will study the large medical advertise- ments that appeal especially to women you will notice that they all have certain symptoms enumerated. No matter if the remedy advertised is for the kidneys, the bowels, or exclusively for women, the same symptoms are claimed to indicate the need of that certain remedy. One of the symptoms most commonly given is backache. Of course ! For nearly every person has a backache at some time. It may be due to a strain, to rheu- matism of the lumbar muscles (lumbago), to con- stipation, to a displacement, or to numerous other conditions. No one can tell the cause who is not properly prepared to do so and who is not fully 67 HERSELF acquainted with the physical condition. The sew- ing machine runs hard and perhaps makes a noise. It requires a mechanic who is famihar with the mechanism of the machine to find the cause of the trouble. So it is with the human body. It re- quires a mechanic who is familiar with the struc- ture of the body to discover the cause of the trou- ble. And yet people will continue to pour into their bodies drugs, harmless and otherwise, that are manufactured by some enterprising firm and then advertised by an expert who knows nothing of disease except a few symptoms common to al- most all diseases. The patent medicine consumers seldom realize the nature of the medicine they take. Because some man, desirous of selling his remedy, claims it will be beneficial, they rush in and buy. To one who knows the true nature of some of these remedies, many laughable instances arc visible. One man recently discovered that a temperance agitator was daily dosing herself with a certain tonic which was known to contain a larger per- centage of alcohol than did the beverages she was denouncing so ardently. Patent medicines may benefit some, but in the 68 FAKE MEDICAL ADVICE majority of cases, the consumer is like a man who boards the nearest street-car hoping it will take him to his destination. It may! But it is just as likely to take him in the opposite direction. Some people become veritable drug fiends, slaves to certain drugs without in the least realiz- ing their condition. How many are slaves to cer- tain laxatives or headache powders I With them the daily dose of " harmless " teas or waters or even of pills cannot be neglected. And yet such a person would be indignant at the suggestion that she was the victim of a drug habit. What arc drugs, anyhow? The majority are simply ex- tracts of herbs and vegetables. And yet people imagine that they are avoiding the use of drugs and medicines when they take " simple herb remedies, prepared at home." Another lure of the advertiser is to state that all letters are " strictly confidential and answered by women only." Perhaps they are! But he neg- lects to add that the women who answer these letters are simply stenographers with no medical knowledge, employed to write according to dicta- tion, that the letters are all written according to certain forms which have been dictated by the 69 HERSELF manager. A short time ago a young woman wrote me regarding her condition. Among other things, she said she had written to a certain woman whose name is much advertised by a patent medi- cine concern and that this woman had written her advice that had caused her to worry over her con- dition. Poor, deluded girl 1 How was she to know that the woman in question had been dead many years and that the business was carried on by her son and other men. If you are ill do not be misled by these un- scrupulous advertisers. Do not waste your time and money on remedies that may be entirely un- suited to vour condition. 70 CHAPTER VII THE MARRIAGE RELATION As several of you expect to be married soon I think it would be well to talk briefly about the cause of so much unhappiness in marriage. It has been estimated that only about five per cent, of all marriages are successful. Is this true, and if true, why? If five per cent, made a suc- cess of marriage, why could not the other ninety- five ? Marriage is a science to be studied by the prospective biide and groom in order that they may be ranked with the five per cent, and not make a failure of their married life. Few would enter the marriage relation if convinced that it would be a failure. The prospective bride looks around among her acquaintances and sees the lack of true happiness, thinks that her case will be an ex- ception, that her marriage will turn out all right and then goes blindly ahead into the new life without any preparation. 71 HERSELF A large percentage of the unhappiness among married couples comes through a misunderstand- ing of the marital relations. A great deal of this is due to ignorance on the part of the bride and thoughtlessness on the part of the husband. This is partly due to defective education during child- hood in regard to the sexes. The training of boys and girls in this matter is very different. Knowledge pertaining to the sexual life is talked over very freely among boys, so that by the time the boy is of a marriageable age he is pretty well posted. With girls it is quite different. It would be considered very immodest for a girl to discuss such matters. She does not feel free even to talk with her mother or other adviser, and so she goes to the altar ignorant of many thiiigs she should know. Then during the first few days of married life this knowledge so overwhelms her and often gives her such a severe shock that it leaves a last- ing impression. She has no way of knowing that her husband is just like other men. She is liable to regard him as a brute and resent his attentions. Such a condition of affairs is altogether wrong, but the girl is not to be blamed. Had she been taught what to expect, much of the unhappiness 72 THE MARRIAGE RELATION of married life might have been avoided. If taught correctly, the girl should regard the sexual act as the culmination of true love. It should be regarded as something sacred, something that makes her and her husband as one. Fortunate indeed is the girl whose husband realizes this lack of knowledge and gently leads her to desire the fulfillment of love. Unfortunate is the girl whose husband regards this act only as the gratification of animal passions — something it is a wife's duty to endure as such. Passion or sex sense is a sign of maturity. It is the calling for a mate. All animals have this sense and nearly all animals have a mating season. The billing and cooing of the birds in the spring- time is an expression of this sense — the love sense. It is possessed by every little insect. Only by knowing their habits do we see the expression of it. This sense is nothing of which one should be ashamed. It was God-given for a divine pur- pose. In the study of plants we learn that the pollen or male element must unite with the ovum or fe- male element in order to produce the seed that will develop into the new plant. The same fact 73 HERSELF is true of the human race. Before pregnancy can take place there must be a meeting and fusion of the vital elements of the two sexes. This fer- tilization of the ovum or joining of the male and female elements Is called conception. It Is brought about by coitus, by means of which the semen of the male is deposited in the vagina of the female. This act is called Insemination, al- though conception does not follow unless the ovum and spermatozoon (life-giving element of the semen) come together and unite. When this occurs the woman conceives and enters upon a period of pregnancy. The time at which con- ception is least likely to occur is from the seven- teenth to the twenty-third day after menstruation ceases. During the first year of married life couples arc liable to abuse the love sense by over-indulgence and thereby use up too much of their energy. This affects their health, especially that of the young wife, who finds herself always being tired and is unable to account for it. Her daily tasks become a drudgery, for she Is too exhausted to have the strength to perform them. After the tasks finally are finished, she is too tired to don 74 THE MARRIAGE RELAIION the afternoon dress, and so easily falls into un- tidy habits. This brings its train of results. The young husband, on his return from work, fails to f^nd his wife the bright, attractive girl he married and gradually grows indifferent. The relation of intercourse to conception Is a problem that each husband and wife must settle for themselves. Some educators claim that only for the one is the other allowable, that the bear- ing and raising of children is the sole aim of married life. Naturally this Is the fundamental end of the sex Instinct. But In the present-day, practical married life it would be impossible to convince the majority that the impulse of sex grat- ification was given to them for this one purpose only. The sense of well being and the increased capacity for work, that follows a moderate exercise of this function, tends to convince us that it has a beneficial effect upon the entire system if exercised moderately. As to what constitutes moderation or temperance depends upon the indivldnal. What would be moderation to some would j excess to others. It may be taken as a general rule that the after-effects will indicate the amount. If the after- 75 HERSELF effects are irritability, extreme lassitude or a dim- inution of the love or respect for the other then there has been excess. If the after-effect is a sense of well-being so that the next day one fteis more inclined to take up the duties of life, then it may be considered that moderation has been practiced. A certain amount of energy is con- sumed in any act and, as in our present age we need a great deal of energy to carry on our everyday business, in the majority of cases fresh vitality cannot be spared for an expenditure un- der several days or a week. Excess in anything tends to bring on premature old age, for the nervous force is expended faster than it is manu- factured. Frequently women seem to be endowed with an excess of energy which manifests itself in various forms. Besides this, the woman does not seem to have control of her nervous energy but wastes it in numerous ways. With many a woman the regularity and moderation attendant on a happy married life seems to have a regulating effect upon her whole nervous system, so that she becomes more calm and has greater control over her energies. 76 THE MARRIAGE RELATION Wrong training or lack of training in matters pertaining to the relationship of the sexes and to the management of a home may be given as the cause of the majority of unhappy marriages. There must be something wrong with our sys- tem of education when the aim of this education seems to be to prepare the girl for a temporary position in an office or store or for a gay social life; and when there is no preparation for the important work of home-making and the rearing of children. A girl would not be expected to run a complicated and delicate piece of machinery without having adequate instruction concerning the necessary care of it. But the girl is allowed to go blindly into marriage and is expected to manage her home and care for her children with practically no preparation. Nowadays we re- quire experts for every position except that of motherhood, but we apparently do not consider that of enough importance to waste any time pre paring for It. A man requires his gardener or office assistant to be trained, but the mother of his children need know nothing regarding the preparation for their coming. Too often her only preparation is that of making numerous 77 HERSELF clothes. She takes no measures to insure a healthy child. If girls would make a study of home-making and motherhood and enter into marriage with a more definite realization of its obligations we would have fewer unhappy marriages and fewer divorce cases. Some women, owing to false edu- cation, wish to have all the advantages of mar- riage without assuming its cares. Such a woman expects a man to be willing to provide her with all the gifts of the gods, with all the luxuries of life, but in return is not willing to become the mother of his children nor to exert herself to make their mutual habitation a home and not merely a house — a place in which to eat and sleep. A large part of the average woman's life is de- voted to home-making and the rearing of chil- dren. Usually she is poorly prepared for this work. The early years of a girl's life arc spent in the acquisition of a store of general knowledge, especially that derived from books and related to subjects generally considered necessary to " cul- ture." During this period, her time is so occu- pied with her studies that her mother thinks it would be an imposition to ask her to do any 78 THE MARRIAGE RELATION housework, so the girl grows up without much knowledge of the care of a home. True, she often is enabled to do a few things. She learns to make cake and several varieties of candy and perhaps can fashion a collar that Is the envy of her schoolmates. Sometimes she even helps her mother with the dishes or the dusting, but It Is easier for the mother to take the responsibility of the housekeeping than It Is to teach her daughter to do so, and besides her daughter always is so busy with school aftalrs. She has no time In which to learn the science of housekeeping. After the completion of her course In the com- mon or high school, a few months, sometimes, are devoted to the preparation for a certain line of work which Is to occupy her time for a few years. Very few girls, except those who enter the pro- fessions, expect to continue their work after mar- riage and nearly all look forward to marriage. If we place a girl at a new occupation, for instance lacc-maklng, and let her work out her own salva- tion, we would not be surprised If she disliked her work and was unable to accomplish any good results. But that is what we do in regard to home-making. A girl upon marriage Is expected 79 HERSELF to know by instinct how to keep house, cook, and do the numerous other household duties; she is expected to know how to care for herself before the birth of her baby and how to care for the baby when it comes. Fortunately for the future generation this fact has come to the realization of many of our educators. During the last few years many schools have introduced into their cur- riculum, courses in domestic science, including the purchasing, preparation and serving of food. Very recently some of the more progressiva schools have introduced courses in nursing and the care of young babies. Perhaps in a few years motherhood will take its proper place as the most important of all sciences. 80 CHAPTER VIII EMBRYOLOGY THE DEVELOPMENT OF LIFE You remember I mentioned that at various times during the month an ovum or egg leaves the ovary and passes along the tube to the uterus. Here it remains if it is impregnated or fertilized by a union with the spermatozoon or male element. The whole body of the babe is developed from the ovum or female element after it has been fertilized by the spermatozoon or male element. The union usually talces place in the tube. The spermatozoon, after being de- posited in the vagina, travels to the mouth of the womb, then up through the womb into one of the tubes. Here it meets the ovum and unites with it, then the impregnated ovum continues on its way to the uterus. It attaches itself to the lining of the womb by little thread-like filaments which it pro- jects. The ovum then begins to grow, dividing itself into portions that go to make the different 8i HERSELF parts of the body. Before I continue, let me re- mind you that the ovum in the beginning is only about as large as the point of a pin, being about 1-125 of an inch in diameter, while the sperma- tozoon is so tiny it cannot be seen without the aid of a miscroscopc. Therefore, it can be real- ized how much the ovum has to grow before it becomes a fully formed babe. During the time the ovum is developing into the babe we speak of it first as the embryo, then the foetus. It takes about nine calendar months or ten lunar months before the foetus is fully de- veloped and ready to be expelled from the womb. During the process of development the foetus re- sembles various animals. It seems it must pass through about the same stages of evolution that our primitive ancestors did. By the end of the third week, the dividing has progressed so far that the body is quite well in- dicated. By the end of the seventh week the body and limbs are quite well defined. One pe- culiar thing is that, at this time, the foetus has a tail which disappears during the next two weeks. During the third month the foetus increases in size and weight so that by the end of the month 82 EMBRYOLOGY the weight is four ounces and the length two and three-fourths Inches. It now Is not directly at- tached to the lining of the womb but Is attached by means of the cord to the placenta or after- birth which has been forming slowly. This placenta consists of fatty tissue surrounding a great many little blood vessels. The tiny blood vessels lie so close to the blood vessels of the lin- ing of the womb that the blood passes from one to the other. To do this, it must pass through the walls of the blood vessels, as the vessels of the mother and those of the placenta are not di- rectly united. The blood vessels of the placenta unite to form two veins and one artery which lie very close to each other and are surrounded by a membrane. These three blood vessels united together form what we call the cord. The other end of the cord Is attached to the fcetus so that the blood can flow back and forth between the foetus and placenta. By the end of the third month the hmbs have definite shape, the nails being almost perfectly formed. During the next month the sexual dis- tinctions of the external organs become well marked. 83 HERSELF By the last of the fifth month the weight has increased to one pound and the length to eight inches. Active foetal movements begin, that is, the foetus begins to move around and not lie quietly as before. This is what is usually spoken of as " feeling life," or as " quickening." There is life from the very beginning but during the first four or five months the foetus does not move about and so the mother does not " feel life." This has caused the erroneous idea that there is no life before the fifth month. By the end of the sixth month the weight is two pounds and the length twelve inches. The eyebrows and eyelashes have begun to grow and the lobule of the ear is more characteristic. By the end of the seventh month the weight is three pounds and the length fourteen inches. The surface of the body, which has appeared wrinkled, now appears more smooth owing to the increase of fat underneath. By the end of the eighth month the weight is four to five pounds and the length twenty inches. The nails have grown to project beyond the finger tips. Up to this time the body has been covered with a fine hair called lanugo. This now has 84 EMBRYOLOGY begun to disappear and the skin becomes brighter and is covered with a white, cheesy material called the vernix caseosa. This almost entirely disappears during the next month, but frequently there are portions of it remaining on the boJy at the time of birth. The foetus is fully developed by the end of the ninth month. Then its average weight is six or seven pounds and the length twenty inches. If we could look into the womb just before the time of labor we would find the foetus attached by the cord to the placenta and floating in a sac of water. This sac is formed partly of the pla- centa and partly of the membrane ; the side of the placenta opposite to the child being attached to the womb. Just before labor the child takes a position with its head downward, its lower limbs flexed and its arms folded upon its breast. This allows it to come in the usual way, head first. But sometimes, for various reasons, it does not take this position and some part other than the head, for instance, the feet, may be born first. Labor pains are caused by the contraction of the muscles of the womb in an effort to exoell the foetus. The muscles, contracting, push the foetus 85 HERSELF downward to the mouth of the womb but push ahead of it a portion of the membrane enclosing some of the water. This is called the " bag of waters." As it presses against the mouth of the worrb it causes it to dilate so as to allow the foetus to pass through into the vagina. The foetus, preceded by the bag of waters, then descends through the vagina or birth canal until it comes to the external opening of the vagina. This it must dilate before it can pass through it. The bag of waters should rupture normally while it is being pushed through the external opening. Sometimes the bag does not rupture directly in. front of the descending head but further up along the side. Then a portion of the membrane may be over the face of the child when it is born. This is what is called being " born with a veil " or " born with a caul." The bag of waters helps dilate the parts much easier than the foetus could do it alone. When the bag breaks the water lubricates the parts so as to make the passage of the child easier. When It breaks, as It sometimes does, at the beginning of labor we have what is termed a " dry labor." This usually is much slower than it would be 86 EMBRYOLOGY otherwise. The majority of the cases of labor extend over a period of from twelve to twenty- four hours. Sometimes the external opening of the vagina does not dilate enough to allow the passage of the child. As the head presses hard against the perineum it tears it. This tear should be re- paired immediately after completion of labor. When the baby is born it is fully formed but its lungs have never contained air. At the first cry the air rushes into the lungs and expands them. At birth there is a change in the circula- tion of the blood of the baby. Before this time, the blood has passed to and from the placenta through the cord but now this is stopped. Be- fore birth there was an opening between the right and left sides of the heart but this closes during the first few days of the child's life. To assist in this closure, it is wise to keep the child on its right side for a few days. Rarely, this opening never closes and we have what is called a " blue baby," which seldom lives very long. In a great many cases, painless childbirth could be a possibility by a little attention to diet, exer- cise and other hygienic measures during the last 87 HERSELF few months of pregnancy. Knowing this, it seems inconceivable that any woman would neglect to so fully inform herself on these matters that both she and her child could have all benefit of the investi- gations of science. 88 CHAPTER IX ABORTIONS Sometimes through an accident or on account of disease, the womb expels the foetus before it is fully developed. If this occurs before the end of the third month we call it an abortion; if it oc- curs between the third and seventh months we call it a miscarriage; while if it occurs after the seventh month but before the normal time of labor we call it a premacurc labor. Formerly ii was considered that there was no possibility of the child living if it were born be- fore the seventh month. Now, by the aid of incubators, even those born at five months have a chance to live. By that time the body is fully formed, so the chief requirements are a steady temperature and proper care and food. Great care must be exercised, as a slight cooling of the air may result in the death of the babe. Abortions are cither accidental, criminal, or 89 HERSELF justifiable, that Is, brought on to preserve the life of the mother. Accidental abortions may fol- low a sudden fall or a sudden shock, either mental or physical, to the mother. They may be due to some disease either of the mother or of the foetus. Of the diseases responsible for abortions the one with the largest percentage is syphilis. It is estimated that this disease is responsible for forty per cent, of accidental abortions and miscarriages. Whenever a physician has for a patient a woman who gives a history of having had several abor- tions without any apparent cause and all at about the same age of the foetus, he Immediately be- comes suspicious of syphilis either of the father or the mother. It is a peculiar fact with this dis- ease that it may be transmitted to the offspring without the mother ever actually having the dis- ease. This is an Instance of " visiting the sins of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation." Many a weak frame owes its condition to a dissipated father, grandfather or even great-grandfather. It is possible, though, for a man or woman who has had this disease to have a healthy child if the disease has been properly treated. 90 ABORTIONS Under some circumstances, especially with a deformed pelvis, if pregnancy were allowed to proceed normally it probably would result in the death of the mother. Then, it is considered justi- fiable for the physician in charge of the case to produce an abortion in order to save the life of the mother. Those cases are rare and such a pro- cedure never is undertaken except in extreme cases. Criminal abortions are those brought on simply because the woman does not desire to have a child. These often are produced by the woman herself by means of drugs that set up uterine contractions (labor pains) or by means of something intro- duced into the uterus. In either case it is a dangerous procedure. Infections may be car- ried into the uterus by means of whatever is In- troduced into it. This may set up an Inflamma- tion that may result in the death of the woman. It Is a dangerous procedure to introduce anything Into the womb. Some women are extremely foolish or reckless and use anything that may be handy. Sometimes grave harm results. In- stances are on record of women who have punc- tured the walls of the womb by the use of hat- 91 HERSELF pins or other sharp Instruments. If an abortion is produced by either drugs or instruments there is danger that all the products of conception may not come away. If even a small portion re- mains in the uterus it may cause a hemorrhage or, becoming decomposed, produce a poison that may result in the death of the woman. It would be impossible to estimate the number of abortions performed on unmarried girb, as well as married women, during one year by mid- wives, unscrupulous physicians and by many re- spected family physicians. We never hear of one of these except through the occasional one who is so unfortunate as to meet death. We can- not entirely blame the one who performs the abor- tion. Sometimes it Is performed because of the sympathy of the physician. It is very hard to refuse some cases. Let me read you a letter to illustrate my meaning. *' I have just finished reading your article on * Woman's Inhumanity to Woman ' and wish to say that every word impresses the truth as read. My reason for writing you is because I am one of those who have sinned through love, with one I have known all my life only to find too late that 92 ABORTIONS he did not love me; and the sin is killing mc. I do not want to bring into this world a little aiild to have no father. I am not bad at heart. My only hope is to get something that will bring me all right. If you are a doctor you can give me medicine that will help me miscarry this, as I have only missed two months. Nothing would please me more than to be the mother of a little one, but, oh, not one born without a name. Dear madam, if you can help me, or show me some way that my people cannot suspect me of this sin, for the love you bear all girls, help me. I am the only one at home to care for an aged father and one of the dearest brothers that ever lived. If he knew I had sinned as I have, it would break his heart. My God in heaven, help met is my prayer, and through his love you can help me. I am almost desperate and before I will live and bear this sin I will take my own life, which will bar me from heaven and my angel mother's face. Be gracious, kind doctor, and help me. I will repay you if it takes the .vmainder of my life and give my solemn promise that I will sin no more. Erring through the love of a man is my only excuse and, oh, I am the one to bear the blame. 93 HERSELF He would be forgiven. I am so nervous and ruiLcd in mind that I hardly can go about my duties and I cannot stand the strain much longer. Let me hear from you at once and please help me, for I know it can be done, but I am ignorant; I do not know what to get or what to do. It will be no sin to try to get all right and not bear a child, but in my thoughts it is something awful to have to have it. For the love of heaven help a heartbroken girl at once and before it is too late for me to regain my chance of heaven." Now suppose you were a physician and that girl, instead of being a stranger, was a very dear friend who had come to you in your office, would you not be tempted to grant her wishes? That is the position in which every physician is placed a great many times. Some allow their sympa- thies to rule and so break the laws of the land. They allow their sympathies to overcome the moral truths that previously had been their guide. They commit a crime by taking a life, even though that life were not fully developed. Many women have the false idea that there is no life before the fifth month and so think they are not destroying life if they have an abortion 94 ABORTIONS at the end of the first, the second or even the third month. This idea is entirely erroneous, for there is life from the very beginning and it is just as wrong to destroy life the first few months as it would be to do so later. Aside from this moral reason there is a very important reason for not havmg abortions. You may regret it afterwards! Let mc give you an instance. One of my friends, a charming young woman, was married several years ago. After her marriage she moved to a distant city and I did not see her for about four years. Then she returned and called to see me. During the course of our conversation I asked her if she had any children. Her reply in a very sad tone was, " No, I guess I did too much interfering at first, so now I cannot have any." Then she told me she had the idea she did not wish to have children for several years after she was married. So dur- ing the first year she had an abortion performed. Now for two years she had been wanting a baby but none came. That is the history of so many women. The regrets ! All women naturally desire to have children. If they do not, they arc the victims of false ideas 95 HERSELF or of fear. Anything which is natural is the best, so usually a woman who bears children is much healthier than one who does not. Think of the women of your acquaintance and see if the mothers are not happier and healthier than the women who are childless. 96 CHAPTER X MATERNAL IMPRESSIONS HEREDITY Every child has a right to be born well. An tjndesired child never should be brought into the world. An undesired child or a child of parents who are not in good bodily or mental condition comes into the world with an inheritance that perhaps never is overcome. How can we expect children of parents with criminal tendencies to become good citizens? Children born in circumstances under which the expectant mother has been subjected to fright or to cruel treatment are handicapped in the very- beginning of life's race. Maternal impressions from fright or physical violence undoubtedly arc followed by the birth of individuals malformed and in many respects with altered minds. Al- though some biologists try to deny this, the coin- cidence is too widely observed to admit of doubt, although the precise manner in which the effect is 97 HERSELF produced has not been clearly demonstrated. Sufficient is known to make it of the utmost im- portance that, in the interest of her offspring, the expectant mother be not subjected to sudden or violent mechanical force or to any great nervous shock. Equally important is it that she should be surrounded by a harmonious environment in order to give the unborn child all possible benefit of such surroundings. By many it is claimed that the mother's mental condition during this period will be reflected in the child both mentally and physically. For instance if the mother be calm, free from worry and happy in anticipation of the coming event, her offspring will have a sound nervous system, shown by a per- fect digestion and an excellent disposition : while if the mother be irritable and unhappy her child is inclined to have various digestive ills, as well as to be cross and restless. Great disturbances in the expectant mother's health also have their effect upon the child. The erroneous idea that there is no life before the third or fifth month allows many conscientious women to attempt measures that will cause the dis- 98 MATERNAL IMPRESSIONS charge of the products of conception. These measures not only are dangerous to the health or the life of the woman but, in the event of their proving unsuccessful, may result in the birth of a deformed or a mentally defective child. Parents who have become degenerate from the immoderate use of alcohol or other stimulants or those who are afflicted with one of the black plagues furnish further examples of the birth of deficient offspring. The question of heredity has received con- siderable attention during recent years. As a re- sult, many of our pet theories have undergone a decided change. Many of the diseases which formerly were thought to be acquired through in- heritance we now know to be contracted through lack of care or through association. The only in- heritance is possibly a tendency to the disease or a decrease in the power of resistance. It Is a law of pathology that the diseases of parents who suffer from certain serious chronic maladies create in the offspring a condition of defective life shown In malformations or in altered nutrition. The hereditary influence of most diseases Is shown in 99 HERSELF the transmission to the child of a defective body shown by feebleness or a diminished power of re- sisting disease. In tuberculosis and other diseases that once were considered hereditary, this influence is shown probably only in a predisposition to the disease which under favorable circumstances finds an easy condition of growth. The child does not actually inherit the disease and if placed in favorable sur- roundings will outgrow the tendency, will over- come the feeble vitality. But such a child if al- lowed to remain with Its parent, to breathe the germs of disease cast off by the parent, readily contracts the disease. For the sake of the child it must be separated from its tubercular parent. It must be given fresh air and nourishing food. There is one disease, though, that seems to be truly Inherited: the worst of the black plagues, syphilis. This may be inherited from either par- ent, It frequently Is Inherited from the father even though the mother docs not contract the disease. This inheritance seems to manifest itself chiefly in a disordered nutrition. Even during the first few months of development, this may be so ef- lOO MATERNAL IMPRESSIONS fective as to destroy life. You remember, I mentioned this when I talked about abortions. If life is not destroyed, the nutritional processes may be so affected that the pregnancy will result in the birth of a defective child. These children, perhaps fortunately, usually die during the first few months of their lives. Seldom do they live to maturity. Many children who seem to have escaped this inherited trait really have not done so, but their inheritance is not recognized. Some people with defective generative organs owe this to a diseased parent. Others suffering from a chronic skin disorder, and many afflicted with epilepsy or some brain malformation could trace their Inheritance to the same source. This disease seems truly to be an instance of " visiting the sins of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation." There is no doubt that the general health of the child is affected by the health of the mother espe- cially during the period when the child is nour- ished from the mother's blood. Attention to such matters as diet, sleep and exercise certainly has a great Influence upon the constitution of the lOI HERSELF unborn child. The best heritage a mother can give her child is a strong constitution, and in order to do this she must make motherhood a science. I02 CHAPTER XI CHILDLESS HOMES AND REAL HOMES CAUSES OF STERILITY Whatever may be the motive that causes men and women to enter Into matrimony, the social reason is the perpetuation of the human race. Herbert Spencer says, " The welfare of the family underlies the welfare of society." Therefore those who marry for convenience or with the avowed Intention of not assuming the obligations of parenthood have not the welfare of the human race at heart and are a menace to society in Its highest form. Childless homes are not the happy homes, any- how! Their occupants usually are dissatisfied; the women are nervous, Irritable and unhappy; the men are seeking happiness elsewhere. The homes childless from choice should receive our condemnation, but the homes childless from necessity should receive our commiseration. The 103 HERSELF latter are much more prevalent than many of our race suicide agitators would admit. These arc too prone to blame the woman for what is not her choice. We hear so much about the higher edu- cation of women promoting race suicide. A re- cent investigation carrl/^d on by a well-known magazine has proven that such is not the case. The college girls and the professional women desire children much more than do the factory girls. But these college girls realize that quality is as necessary as quantity. They do not desire to bring into the world weak, puny offspring. These college girls are beginning to make mother- hood a science. What the results will be we can only anticipate. A normal woman, who has not become Imbued with false ideas and fear, desires children. She realizes that motherhood, if rightly carried out, is a privilege and not a curse; it is the woman who has been falsely educated who dreads mother- hood. This morning I received a letter which shows the prevailing attitude of many girls. The writer says: *' I am twenty-two years of age but strange to say I am ignorant as far as knowledge about th» 104 CAUSES OF STERILITY origin of life, etc., is concerned. I am a business girl, drawing a good salary, and have many gentle- man and lady friends. I am the oldest child of a large family of moderate means and have been brought up under Christian principles and pos- sess a goodly amount of common sense. I long have been anxious in regard to this important subject but never have asked anyone for advice, shuddering to do so, feehng thar if I had a chance to ask a lady with knowledge, as a nurse or some such person, I would do so. But to tell the truth, I did not care to find out such things, but I real- ize the fact that I must know in order to guard myself; for that is something no one can do for me at a critical moment. I have no less than three gentleman admirers, but I have no desire to be a married woman for a long time to come, but I feel that I must be armed with the knowledge of right and wrong. I shudder on account of fear to think of becoming a mother. I hear so much of woman's pains and aches and the such, that I often think I would prefer to remain single all my life, although I am perfectly healthy and a happy, cheerful girl. My mother is, and always will be, too busy to tell me about such matters, 105 HERSELF although I had a right to know long ago. As you say, an Ignorant, innocent girl would be guilty before the world if something wrong should hap- pen to her and in most cases it is not her fault. Can you give me the desired information or can you recommend some good book? If so, I assure you that your efforts will be greatly appreciated." This letter certainly indicates that the writer has a good amount of common sense. The trouble is she has become over-impressed with the possi- bilities of pain, and never has been told the won- derful truths that would overcome this fear. If love is the greatest thing in the world, fear and Its companion, worry, certainly are the greatest curses of humanity. And the most pitiful par; is that this fear and worry usually result from ignorance which a little instruction at the right time could dispel so easily. It is the unknown things that we fear. When any trouble actually comes we find strength enough to meet it, and, anyway, it usually is not half as bad in the reality as in the prospect. Young girls hear so much about the pains of childbirth that this fear overshadows the natural longings for motherhood. It is not until 1 06 CAUSES OF STERILITY motherhood is an actual fact that they renlize the happiness is worth all the cost. But this fear is not what actually makes many childless homes. They often are unpremeditated. A large percentage of the sterility in the world is due to the results of indiscretions that are the out- come of ignorance. One great factor in childless homes is the prevalence of the black plagues. It is estimated that forty-five per cent, of sterile mar- riages are due to that seemingly mild disease which is regarded as no worse than a cold and which has been contracted either by the man or the woman. This disease aoes not disqualify the woman alone, as was formerly thought, for recent investigations have proven that twenty-five per cent, of the sterile marriages are due to sterility of the male. Oh, the innumerable women who have submitted to un« pleasant treatments and even operations in the hope of overcoming sterility when all the time the fault was elsewhere ! The microscope has proven that even though a man may seemingly be healthy and capable of sustaining the marriage relation, yet his efforts are valueless ; for the spermatozoa, the life-giving element, are dead, due usually to 107 HERSELF an Inflammation which accompanied an attack of this seemingly mild disease, — gonorrhoea. This disease is responsible for many of the one child marriages. How often we see a family with only one child, this child born during the first year of married life, then there are no more preg- nancies. The woman probably has contracted a disease from her husband and, during the period immediately following the birth of her baby when the entire generative system is in a condition to easily become inflamed, the tubes have become closed. Another pregnancy is very unlikely. Another factor in sterility is abortions. So many times we hear a young married woman say, " I do not want a child the first year, but after that I would like one." In order to carry out her desires it is not uncommon for an abortion to be performed during the first few months. In many cases an inflammation follows this interference and the tubes become closed perm.anently. Then when the voman is ready to have a child it is impossible. Girls about to enter marriage should be cognizant of this possibility and not take any risks, for few women would do anything voluntarily that would condemn them to childless lives. io8 CHAPTER XII PREVENTION OF PREGNANCY This morning I received a letter which says in part, " I am a young school teacher and do not know lots I should, but will come to you for ad- vice. Now I am engaged to the dearest boy In the world. I will do my best to be a good wife and do my duty. But my health is not so very good and I want to put oft motherhood for awhile. Will you kindly tell me some remedy that will keep me from becoming pregnant? I have long wanted to ask someone but always was afraid. Mother never tells me anything." This is the type of question that is asked every physician many times. Those who do not ask, wish to — and blame physicians for not telling the things they want to know. What is my an- swer to such a question? Just this: There is in effect a federal statute making It a felony punishable by $5,000 fine and five years 109 HERSELF at hard labor to impart any information whatever relating to the preventing of conception. The in- formation may concern a thing, an instrument, or it need not be any material substance at all — only a " method." I obey that law as I am not fool- hardy enough to walk into absolute danger. Every day we see examples of heart-breaking misery caused by lack of knowledge of the proper means of prevention. The limitation of the num- ber of offspring has become an important problem to be considered. There are thousands of families that would be perfectly happy if the number of offspring could be limited. There are thousands of young men who would be glad to get married but are afraid to do so for fear of having a family larger than they could supply with the necessities of life. These same young men, be- cause they are not married, frequent questionable houses and often contract one or more of the venereal diseases. There are thousands of women who have be- come semi-invalids because of a too prolific off- spring. The babies came so fast the mother had no opportunity to regain her health and strength. TKere are other thousands of women who are made no PREVENTION OF PREGNANCl: Invalids because of attempts at abortion, or have been driven into early graves by these attempts^ while some have actually killed themselves. There are thousands of children half starved because their parents are unable to supply them the necessities of life. There are other thousands of children below par mentally and physically be- cause of the fact that the mother was weak from too frequent childbearing. There are other thou- sands of children born of syphilitic, tubercular or epileptic parents v/ho never should have been born at all because they came into life so handi- capped and had to fight against such severe odds that they, after a brief struggle, met an early death. There are children brought into this world amidst cursing who never hear much else. We find it necessary to regulate the parentage of our domestic animals in order to insure a good race. But children can come by chance. The most degraded of men is allowed to beget chil- dren of his kind. There is small chance for race improvement under such conditions. The same laws hold true as to the future generation of humans as are true of animals or plants. Human beings are not mere animals and they III HERSELF should be allowed to decide how many children they should have. Furthermore, the present laws do net attain their object. We all pretend to obey the laws but everyone knows that in every city there are many women, and men also, who make an excellent Income from performing abor- tions. I would venture to say that in Chicago alone there Is at least one abortion performed every hour — and Chicago Is not so very different from other parts of the country in this respect. The ways and means to prevent pregnancy are sold and are bringing a rich reward to their manu- facturers. But the advertisements are so care- fully worded that the law is not violated. But the interested understand. If the manufacturer or his agent were accused of selling anything to pre- vent pregnancy, he would simulate great surprise and possible indignation. He doing such a thing! Impossible ! Why, he Is selling a simple hygienic device or drug used in the treatment of certain diseases. If we have laws, let us obey them; but if we do not intend to obey them, let us stop being hypo- crites and remove them from the statutes. If I 12 PREVENTION OF PREGNANCY the law remains let us make it far-reaching enough to include those who now are so flagrantly violat- ing it. But if means for the prevention of preg- nancy are necessary to the health and happiness of the human race, let us change the laws so we can have the best of these preventives and allow rep- utable physicians to give whatever information they can to prevent this wholesale misuse of a law by the unscrupulous, — the law-breakers. A recent investigation carried on by one maga- zine proved that the knowledge of how to prevent conception would not mean race suicide, as some fear. As reported in this magazine, the college girls and professional women who no doubt had given these subjects careful consideration, desired children more than did those whose experience had been a poor home and a large family. The aver- age number of children desired by the well- informed woman was four. That would not mean race-suicide! It would mean that children were given a fair start in life by being desired and planned for before their conception. Every trufl woman desires a home and children but 9^^e does not wish to be driven Into motherhood. Every "3 HERSELF true man desires a family but he docs not feci justified in bringing children into the world to be half starved and with no advantages of education. What is the solution of the problem? 114 CHAPTER XIII SOME OF THE CAUSES OF DIVORCE Until our marriage laws are so adjusted that there are no unequal marriages, the question of divorce always will be eminent. The ever present agitation about uniform divorce laws and the di- vorce problem cannot be settled until there are more stringent marriage laws. Trying to settle the divorce question without first settling the mar- riage question is like trying to keep chickens in a small yard surrounded by enticing fields without first constructing an adequate fence. Divorce Is the concession of society to its in- ability to solve the marriage problem. Anyone can get married ! Mere children can meet on a pleasure excursion and In a moment of fun or infatuation walk over to a justice of the peace and be married. In some estates not even a license is necessary. A large proportion of the marriages In the world are consummated without a proper 115 HERSELF consideration on the part of either bride or groom as to the responsibilities of the marriage state. Many of the marriages are made simply as a mat- ter of convenience — In order to Inherit property, for social position or in a spirit of pique. Such marriages are not natural marriages and are In violation of the right spirit of the law of mar- riage. The much quoted saying, " What God hath joined together, let no man put asunder," surely does not apply to these marriages; for that very admission would be a condemnation of the wisdom of God. He surely never would give his sanction to many of the marriages contracted in a spirit of lust or of greed. It is as impossible to keep mismated people to- gether as it Is to keep chemical incompatiblcs together. No chemist would try to keep chlorate of potash and sulphur together even if they did, by some accident, happen to be In the same locality. It Is just as Impossible to keep two incompatible people together and not expect an explosion. The law may keep such people legally bound, >Jt It cannot keep them so mentally or phys- ically. A prominent rctormer is reported to have said that fully one-third of the married ii6 SOME OF THE CAUSES OF DIVORCE population of New York City Is unfaithful to the physical obligation. And New York is not so very different from other parts of the country. Many who are not physically dis- loyal are mentally so. The no-divorce law will not prevent this condition of affairs. Whites and blacks cannot marry legally In the South and yet In some of the Southern states which have a no- divorce system a large proportion of the colored population is mulatto. Nature's laws tend to provide an indissoluble union, but divorce represents the protest of the individual against the Inharmonious relations he ignorantly or thoughtlessly has assumed. Even those who are the loudest in their con- demnation of divorce could not sanction marriage under certain conditions. I wonder If these peo- ple know that many of the divorces that are granted under the head of cruelty really are granted because one of the parties has contracted one of the loathsome black plagues. No humane person could condemn a v/oman for refusing to live with a man and take the almost certain risk of contracting a disease that would mean hef death or mutilation, or for refusing to bear chil* 117 HERSELF dren that would come into the world an object of disgust and horror or which would die before be- ing born. Some of these reformers say, " Let her live separately from him but not marry again.'* That would be condemning an innocent woman to a childless life because she had been so unfortunate as to become bound to a dissipated man. Another underlying but often unknown factor in many of the divorce cases is sterility. In some states the law says this is a just cause for divorce, because the future of the nation depends on the production of children. Because a woman, in her ignorance, has married a man who is incapable of producing healthy offspring, due to his having " sown his wild oats," should not be a reason why she should be condemned to forego the pleasures of motherhood. Because a man has married a woman who is sterile or who selfishly refuses to bear children should not be a reason why he should be denied an heir. Again, it is unfair to the future generation to compel mismated couples to live together. Chil- dren brought into the world under such conditions arc bequeathed a heritage that will have a de- moralizing effect upon their whole after life. ii8 SOME OF THE CAUSES OF DIVORCE Children, who every day hear quarrels and strife between those they should honor, lose something of the beauty of life; they become hardened and quarrelsome. Of course these divorces must not be granted promiscuously; for in bringing children into the world, parents assume an obligation that cannot be neglected. In considering a separation, the parents' first thought should be, " What is best for my children? " The duty to the children should be settled first. Then the question comes, " What is my duty to my wife or my husband? " for the act of making any contract imposes certain obligations. The Individual circumstances must settle what these obligations arc. Last comes the question, "What is my duty to myself? I was placed in this world to make the best use of my life. Am I doing it or is It Impossible to do so unless I change my environment and associates ? " The conscience of the Individual should be the guide now. Were there more frankness and sincerity in dis- cussing the problems and conditions of married life before marriage much unhapplness would be avoided and there would be fewer divorces; for many engaged people would thus discover they 119 HERSELF were mismated before the marriage ceremony. To reach a complete understanding is the main purpose of the engagement period. Marriage is not a lottery nor a game of chance to the man and woman entering it with a knowledge of sex rela- tions and with absolute mutual honesty. 120 CHAPTER XIV THE NEED OF EARLY INSTRUCTION OF GIRLS Dr. Charles W. Eliot, former president of Harvard University, recently said: " The subject of reproduction and sexual hy- giene should be more generally presented to young people by parents and teachers. I am con- vinced that the policy of silence has failed dlsas- trouslv." That you may understand how widely spread is this desire on the part of women for a better knowledge of themselves and of those things so vitally important to the welfare of the future generation, I shall quote a few extracts from letters I have received from women In various parts of the country. These letters, too, will serve to show the woeful ignorance along these lines among even the well educated women, and also the need for some systematic instruction. A very intelligent girl from South Dakota 121 HERSELF writes this heart story: " My mother died when I was a babe. After her death I was sent out among strangers. While away from home and before I was six years old a young fellow about fifteen years old possessed me and threatened to do something terrible to me if I told. I did not dare tell. Luckily I was taken home at that time, as I now had a step-mother. But still more hor- rible, it also happened that I had immoral re- lations with my brother. When I found out that this was the way people got babies, I wished I could get one. I was not very old before I un- derstood that this was a wrong and a shame and acted accordingly. My parents never mentioned things of this nature to me. How much better it would have been if they had done so when we were real young. How many things were spoken of by schoolmates and told in the dirtiest possible way and things also were said that I now know were entirely wrong." 1 cannot impress upon you too strongly the need of early talks with young children on these matters. As soon as they enter school at the age of six and even belore this, in some cases, they arc bound to hear these things from their play- 122 THE NEED OF EARLY INSTRUCTION mates. Usually the information Is thrust upon the child in a very vulgar manner, or entirely wrong impressions are given. The very secrecy that always has surrounded these subjects makes them an object of interest to children. The func- tions of the generative organs are just as natural a process as the process of digestion. We make no secret of the process of digestion, and children do not manifest any morbid curiosity regarding it. If we v.'ould discuss the functions of the genera- tive organs In just as natural a way, many of our great problems would right themselves. A woman In one of the western states writes, " Once I had a heated argument upon that sub- ject with another woman. She always had lived in a small community. In her opinion all city girls were morally depraved. She had two daughters of her own. Both girls gave birth to babies at the age of fourteen and sixteen years. It transpired later that these girls first began the evil practice at school. And I will state here, regardless of contradiction, that the village school is often the breeder of immoral characters among both boys and girls. " In a small farming community of California 123 HERSELF containing about forty children of school age, it was discovered that immoral practices had been carried on for years among the older children. One little girl, being new to the school and also being in the habit of telling her mother every- thing, repeated some of the sights she had seen during the recess and noon hours, and also some of the conversation she had heard among the children. The mother, being horrified at the child's revelations and knowing the child must have some foundation for her stories, told a friend about it. This woman told some of her friends who were the mothers of the children the little girl had named to her mother. Of course, the children were questioned and denied all knowl- edge of things the child had mentioned. The mothers were indignant that their children should be accused of anything like that. They unques- tionably believed the denial, making no effort to find out if there might be any truth in the report. That mother and her little one were * sent to Coventry' with a vengeance. Later some of these mothers had cause to repent of their care- lessness in having neglected or disregarded the 124 THE NEED OF EARLY INSTRUCTION warning. They found to their sorrow that the little girl was not telling an untruth, after all. "The trouble with the mother in the small community is that she judges her children by her own past. She, perhaps, had an entirely different environment from that of her children and be- cause she came out all right, naturally sees no use in bothering about talking to her girls. ' They will learn these things soon enough,' she says when the subject is mentioned. That they either already have learned them or may be learn- ing them in a manner of which she would be the last to approve, she does not take into considera- tion. An attempt to warn such a mother often is misunderstood." That young women realize their need and are anxious for any help is shown by these letters. From New York a girl writes, " I am twenty-two years of age and as yet know nothing about the mysteries of life, and I am beginning to worry about it as I am keeping company with a young man and expect to become engaged to him. I know nothing of what is expected of me when I get married and I know there are a number 125 HERSELF of girls just like me and that they are worried, too." From a girl in Seattle came this letter, " No one ever told me about this wonderful body of ours and that God made it in his likeness for his glorification. When I asked where the babies came from, I was told the doctor brought them in his case. One day I saw a boy and girl about eight years of age doing wrong, and thought nothing of it when my brother, who was fourteen while I was six, proposed that we do likewise. This was kept up until I was somewhere between eleven and thirteen, when I was converted and it occurred to me that this was not the right thing to do, but I never dreamed that I would suffer so these ten years, as I am twenty-three now. Only in the last few years I have learned how God made these organs for the marriage relation only and how life was formed. I would go to my mother for this information but I know it would break her heart and I am afraid she could not tell me what I want to know. I would not write thia but I am deeply in love with a Christian man, and I could not marry anyone until I know about this matter. I often have made a vow I never would 126 THE NEED OF EARLY INSTRUCTION marry anyone, but this love came to me before I could help myself, and as he told me of his love I would not allow myself to let him know I care as much as I do. Kindly tell me if anyone who has abused her organs while so young could make a good wife or become a mother, and can these marks of sin be removed? " Another young girl writes, " It is just as you say, ignorance is the root of evil in many cases such as mine. I have come to you for help, in- formation and advice. I have taken that fatal mis-step you write about, but no one knows it besides myself and this man. He dare not speak of this. He is very wealthy and influential. After reading your article I found that you were the one to go to and make a confession. I never have been warned or told of these dangers and now it is too late. I am a young girl, eighteen years old, and have a lot of men friends because I am considered attractive, but none of them have ever said one word out of the way to me except this one and I yielded to the tempter. I know I have done wrong, and now am trying to atone for it by being awfully good. Now, what I want to know and want you to tell me is this, ' Can I ever 127 HERSELF marry a decent, respectable man without him knowing of this affair? ' There is a young man very much devoted to me (and I can assure you it is mutual) who several times has asked me to marry him. I am afraid to give him an answer. I cannot ask anyone else this question for the simple reason that I am not sure whether they will tell me the truth or whether they really know." Both these girls were fortunate that they did not have any serious consequences from their mis- step. Too many girls make only one mis-step and as a result become pregnant or else contract one of the black plagues. This week I have received several such letters. Laying aside all moral points, it is too much risk for any girl to run. Unfortunately a great many girls in their ignorance do make a mis-step. That is no reason why they should not marry. We must take into consideration the fact that the young man in ques- tion probably has made several of these mis-steps. He should not expect his prospective wife to be any stronger to resist temptation than he has been. U this were an ideal world, all men, as well as all women, would be pure, but until the millennium 128 THE NEED OF EARLY INSTRUCTION comes we must take things as they are, and pro- ceed from that standpoint. But because a girl has erred through ignorance is no reason why she should be doomed to everlasting punishment in the shape of social ostracism or being denied the hap- piness of having a home and children. These are only a few of the many letters I have received, but they serve to show the great need of early instruction of girls on these much neglected subjects. Every girl, soon after she enters school if not before, learns where babies come from. She too often is led by older children, both boys and girls, to do things she may regret later. It has been said that " sin is but ignorance." This is true in the great majority of cases of immoral practices among girls as well as among boys. The remedy for these cins, then, is to do away with the ignorance by proper instruction of children. Children are reasonable beings and if they under- stood the why would not do wrong. If girls go wrong through ignorance the parents are to blame; for at the present time there is no excuse for a parent not giving the necessary in- struction. If, on account of her own lack of knowledge, the mother feels incapable of instruct- 129 HERSELF Ing her daughter, there arc others ready and will- ing to aid her; also, there are books especially pre- pared for her help, which will definitely point the way- 130 CHAPTER XV WHY GIRLS GO ASTRAY Not long ago an estimable young woman in speaking of the unfortunate girls in the world said, " I cannot see how any refined girl could get into trouble. I cannot conceive of any circumstances which would permit any self-respecting girl to al- low the familiarities necessary for such a condi- tion." That is the attitude assumed by many intelligent women. Because they grew up in an environment without temptations, because they had no unsatisfied longings to be loved or to be popu- lar, they arc incapable of understanding these feelings in any other person. In every girl there is an inborn longing to be loved and to have a home of her own. It is a misunderstanding of this sense that is responsible for the wrecked lives of many girls. In too many homes there is no expression of the love sense. Frequently I have heard girls remark, " Why, I 131 HERSELF never think of kissing my parents except, perhaps, when they or I go away." In too many homes the only mention that is made of love is that made in a bantering manner. A child has the right idea of love. She loves everyone and is free in the expression of this love. As she grows older she obtains wrong ideas of love and she too often obtains these wrong ideas in her own home and from her own parents who instill false ideas of love when indulging their habit of " teasing." Frequently we hear parents talking about the small daughter's *' beau." The child feels pent-up emo- tions of love and, as there is no outlet at home in a natural way, she acquires the idea that these emotions should be spent in a childish love affair. In a recent address Professor Marx Lubine of the University of Berlin said, " Motherhood, ;n all stages of civilization, has been strangely igno- rant of the fact that girls have as powerful a bat- tery of emotions as boys. It is my experience that a major portion of mothers understand their sons better than their daughters. Why? The daugh- ters arc not given credit for a power of emotion the sons arc capable of. Yet, naturally, in my 132 WHY GIRLS GO ASTRAY long experience with both sexes, I have no hesita- tion in saying that the emotions of a pure girl are usually deeper, more lasting, than those of a boy, and that if we are to have a great improve- ment in womanhood it must come through a recog- nition of this fact." It is strange but mothers seem to be blind to, or ignorant of the emotions that are seething back of the clear eyes of their daughters. The emotions of the girl have not been studied sufficiently. We expect a boy to do things which serve as an outlet to his pent-up emotions but we expect a girl to go on in a calm, uneventful manner with no outlet for the overflow of emotions. Blessed are the " Tom- boys." I would there were more of them. It is a fact that the girl who runs, plays, climbs trees and is given to outdoor sports generally during the early part of her life develops into the truest woman. She has an outlet for her energies. Her time is fully occupied with those things that pro- mote health. She has no time nor desires for those things that show a perverted taste. Such a girl seldom becomes a victim of self-abuse. She is not inclined to romantic love affairs. It is her sister who sits and sews who has time and in- ^33 HERSELF clination for Indulging in morbid longings and who becomes the victim of pernicious habits. Curiosity is one of the prominent characteristics of both sexes. With the boy this is satisfied with- out much pretence at secrecy. False modesty pre- vents the girl from openly obtaining the desired information. She obtains it secretly from her companions. Mothers do not give their daughters credit for the instinct that compels the satisfaction of their curiosity. Sometime during her life, nearly every mother is surprised and shocked at the knowledge displayed by her daughter. She finds that owing to her silence and neglect of opportunities her daughter has obtained definite if entirely wrong ideas of sexual matters. In other matters, too, the policy of silence or of arbitrarily forbidding the daughter to indulge in certain pleasures, coupled with the natural curiosity of the girl, tends to develop in her the habit of deceitfulness. If she is forbidden some harmless amusements she very frequently learns these diversions at the homes of her friends. The mother was brought up in one generation, the daughter in another; what was considered wrong in the first generation is looked upon in an cn- 134 WHY GIRLS GO ASTRAY tircly different manner now. Many mothers seem to be unable to realize this. They were brought up in a puritanical environment. The puritan fathers forbade all indulgence in mirth and happiness. Their ideas of the perfect life were to wear a stern, unsmiling countenance and do those things that were unpleasant. If anything was uncongenial, then it was their duty to over- come their inclinations. These puritans expected to develop by repression. We have changed our ideas radically since then, but some of the puritan- ical ideas still cling to us in our treatment of children. To develop the child's character she must be made to do the things she does not want to do and to refrain from the things she most de- sires. Is it right? We are most interested in those things that belong to us individually or in which we have some share. If we wish a girl to remain at home then we must see that she is interested in that home. The way to do this is to make her feel that the home belongs to her in part and that some portions of it are entirely hers. The majority of girls feel no real interest in their homes. They are made to feel that it is their ^■35. HERSELF parents' home and that they are only assistants. A girl to be interested in her home must have some definite room that is hers alone and in which she is allowed to exercise her individual tastes. She must have a place in which she can entertain her friends without the feeling that whatever she does and says is to be criticised afterwards. She should be assigned to certain tasks and held responsible for them. She must have a certain definite al- lowance out of which she is to buy certain things, otherwise her desire for independence will arise and cause her to leave home. The majority of girls have no income of their own. Perhaps their desires are all fulfilled by an indulgent parent and yet the girls resent the feeling of dependence. Girls are naturally just as ambitious as boys, and they need good, honest work to keep them healthy and their minds occupied. If a girl dis- plays an interest in a certain line of work this interest must be encouraged. Usually it is not. The girl is taught, either consciously or uncon- sciously, that whatever occupation she takes up will be only temporary, that to become engrossed in her work would mean no marriage. Girls can- not do good work under such conditions. 136 CHAPTER XVI SELF-ABUSE In one of my articles for one of the leading women's magazines I spoke of mental self-abuse. This brought me so many inquiries regarding both mental and physical self-abuse that I feel impelled to explain them to you. To abuse means to use wrongly, or to Injure. Wc have talked about the uses of the female organs and also about the care of them. Some- times, I have watched children rub their eves until they were quite red and inflamed. I have seen children, thoughtlessly, stick pins and hair- pins in their ears and I even have had to remove a bean which a thoughtless child had pushed up its nose. All these things did more or less harm to the parts. In the same way, some girls play with their external generative organs and even put things up in the vagina. Sometimes they in- jure these organs greatly, and sometimes there 137 HERSELF is a more general and serious effect. You know the nerves of the body all are very closely con- nected like telegraph wires so that an irritation to one part will sometimes be telegraphed to an- other entirely different part and cause the nerves of that part to be irritated. When you have a toothache your whole face and head and even your arms ache. That is because the nerves are irritated. In the same way if one irritates the nerves of the female organs, the whole body may be affected; only in this case it is more serious than with the toothache; for these female organs arc n>ore abundantly supplied with nerves. One who is guilty of such an unnatural prac- tice as to deliberately irritate any portion of her body, especially the very important generative or- gans, always secretly despises herself. If per- sisted in, the results of this vice arc a ruined nervous system and a weakened character. The victim realizes she is doing a disgraceful thing and seldom acknowledges her habit even to her physician. If one has become a victim of such a habit she should determine to stop it immediately and then take measures to restore her nervous system to '38 SELF-ABUSE its original state. It never is too late to com- mence treatment. It Is the continued practice and the mental dwelling on the acts that does the harm, not the few acts thoughtlessly performed. Of course the longer the habit has continued, the more firmly it Is fixed and the harder to break. The treatment is first to absolutely stop the practice, then fill your mind with other thoughts. Take considerable physical exercise in the open air. Sleep on a hard bed in a well-ventilated room. Eat plain, nourishing food without spices and stimulants. Take up some work or play that will interest you and that will keep your mind oc- cupied. Live in the open air as much as possible. If you find yourself desiring to do these harmful things, go immediately and busy your mind and hands with something else and the desire will pass soon. In young children this habit often has its origin in some irritation of the external organs, as a hooded clitoris. So before taking severe meas- ures to break the habit, it is wise to have the child examined for such a condition. Now as to mental self-abuse, perhaps I can make my meaning more clear by again quoting from some of my letters. A young woman from 139 HERSELF South Carolina wrote me, " A few years ago I taught school and one of my pupils, perfectly in- nocent of the grave results that would befall her, committed three outrages upon herself, what is known in the medical world as masturbation or self-abuse. The girl, as I know, was chaste and a sweeter, nicer, brighter pupil I never taught. But she had the misfortune to commit these abuses upon herself in all innocence and felt no discom- fort or ill health in any way until about three months afterward. Then she began to lose in- terest in her work, to fall away in her grades, in fact to take very little interest in anything. In this condition she came to me and told me every- thing. Since then she has felt no physical pain whatever, but her mind, though not really gone, is visibly affected. In this way, she is constantly in dread lest something dreadful will happen, ieels as if a cloud were hanging over her, is not capable of doing any mental work. At times, has 1 horror of being shut up in any place, memory is poor, places and positions change, that is, a place moves to some other position, for instance, the right "Side of the street very often is in the op- posite direction. To sum it all up, she constantly 140 SELF-ABUSE is miserable. So far as being insane is concerned, she is not that. She is perfectly conscious of her condition. She feels well physically and appears to be so mentally, but says there is just a befogged sensation in her head which gets no better nor worse, yet it is there. The feeling came upon her very suddenly one morning in the spring after the abuses had taken place in January and then it all flashed over her the awfui consequences of her Innocent practices. Oh! what would she not have given to be her old self again! If she only had known the awful result, her mind sacrificed for a practice in which she Indulged through ignorance and for experiment, never dreaming the baneful effect it would have on her mind. Now, this girl has gone on this way for the past eight years getting no worse nor any better. Seemingly, she is the same but she suffers untold miseries when alone, conscious that her mind is hazy and not capable of enjoying books, society of others or anything that Interests young girls. Yet nobody ever would detect that she is not feeling well. She told me all this In confidence and as the case puzzles me, I write you feeling that perhaps you would advise me in some way the treatment nec- 141 HERSELF cssary to cure her. She Is and has been perfectly moral since the fateful abuses upon herself and I do not understand why her mind does not return to its normal condition." I do! She will not give her mind a chance to get well. She constantly is abusing it by dwell- ing on things that should have been forgotten long ago. No one goes through life without making some mistakes. Everyone has burned his finger many times. And yet he does not keep worrying about it and wondering if It will have some dan- gerous after-effect. Of course, if he deliberately burned his finger time and time again, It might remain injured permanently. But if he, igno- rantly or accidentally, has burned it once or several times, he stops his careless ways, allows Nature to restore the injured portion, and then forgets there ever was an injury. It is the same with self-abuse, many children do things like this thoughtlessly. But when a girl learns she is in- juring herself, she should stop the practice and allow Nature to repair the wound. Then forget all about It. Do not worry, above all things. Go ahead and fill your mind with work. There are many women in this world who arc 142 SELF-ABUSE abusing themselves by worrying over something that has occurred in the past. Whatever is in the past cannot be undone. All we can do is to profit by our experience and turn the energies, that would be wasted by worrying, to some good use. When- ever thoughts of the past or desires for the wrong things disturb you, crowd these worry thoughts and desires out of your mind by putting in it good thoughts. Deliberately fill your mind and hands so full of other things that there will be no room for these unwholesome pests. Worry does more harm than smallpox ever did! This dwelling on past mistakes is only one of several methods of mental self-abuse. Another way some abuse themselves Is by continuing the association with those who excite or irritate them. If in your work or social life you find that a cer- tain person has an effect upon you that is not wholesome, that when you are in the company of that individual you are incapable of doing your best, then it is time to make a change. Keep away from that individual until such a time as you are strong enough to resist his influence. Choose your friends from among those who stim- ulate you mentally. If you stop to think, you must 143 HERSELF admit that you accomplish more and better work when in the presence of certain people. Those are the ones whose companionship you should seek. There are people living together or working together who are a continual source of Irritation to each other. It is just as impossible for such people to work in harmony as it is for two In- compatible chemicals, as nitrogen and iodine. We do not try to over-ride the laws of Nature by trying to force these chemicals to stay together. It Is just as Impossible to force certain Incompatible people to be harmonious. If society or business throws two such people together it would be wise for one to m^.ke a change before there is an ex- plosion. It is impossible for any person to do good work in an atmosphere of irritation. Another element in mental self-abuse is longing for the unattainable. Sometimes a person sets her mind on a certain thing. If that goal is an honorable one, she should make every effort to at- tain it but if circumstances over which she has no control make that goal Impossible of attainment she should turn her thoughts In another direction. But that is what many people do not do. If they cannot have just what they want they sit and 144 SELF-ABUSE bemoan their fate and give up trying for other goals. Such a person should choose a line of work or play that is especially interesting to her and bend her energies in that direction. She will be surprised how soon she will lose her intens/e interest in her former longed-for goal. Lack of self-confidence is an evidence of mental self-abuse. A person who has no confidence in herself cannot expect others to have. One who keeps herself in the attitude of Uriah Heap, who continually asserts, " I am a poor worm, I am unworthy of the blessings of life, I cannot expect great reward," must expect to be taken at her word. In this age a man (or woman) is valued^ in a large measure, by the estimate he sets upon himself. Honors are not thrust upon a man un- less he shows the self-confidence which commands confidence. Bacon said, " Some are born great, some achieve greatness and some have greatness thrust upon them." But those of the last class are very few. Our enemies are willing to thrust upon us scandal and humiliation whenever there is a possible chance, but our friends are verv slow in thrusting honors upon us. If a person wants anything in this world he must first convince him- 145 HERSELF of has ability to attain that goal, dKO he may be alile to csonnce others. It is the man with ccm- fidcBcs in InBiself who wins the day. After one bas dedded upon his goal he sbcmld keep liiat goal always before him as die pillar of fire before the. seekers for the promised land- All oxzr thwi^rts dhnold be in that direction. Efctv whh or ll»iwigl»t we send out reaches someone and m Uaat rriEv bii^ as what we wish. ** By faith jic am z^zcompbsh. aO. tbmg^' ' Hktc is ar £3.-planatinn of " Who answen * which dt; - ■ e a motker kneeling by the of her sicit Daby, and praying faith fuDy ' bsdijr ai^at. be restored to health. In a vifiiiHi ihc awrtluM sees diCK prayer thoog^its radiat- ing jEraoi Ac nuMther like in-risible telegraph wires, ala^g vbidi tbc menage is carried to rarions parts 0i die atf. Qdc wire readies the home of a tm'nmmm irfio, akhoo^ willing, feels his inabifity La answer. Aoodica' wire reaches the home of a wealthy bndcer bat be, too, is powerless to help. The next wire is cooaaect^d with the home of a prannincnt lawyer famons for his ability to wm cases iar tht acedy, bat in this case he cannot win, for Deadi is more powerful than he. But a 146 - ; - ■, - « ■ :-.?*s seit; i4/ HERSELF and there forget self and your troubles. " It is more blessed to give than receive " is a truth that all serene and great souls recognize and practice throughout their lives. 148 CHAPTER XVII EFFECTS OF IMMORAL LIFE Some time ago, the general public was shocked by a newspaper story of the life led by many girl clerks in the department stores of a large city. It seems a young girl from the country applied for a position in one of the stores, but upon hearing of the small wages paid, said, " How can I live on that? It would not provide even the most meager of board and the smallest room.." The employer asked In reply, " But have you not a gentleman friend?" That reply, repeated to a social worker, started an investigation which re- sulted in startling revelations. It was found that many of the stores paid such small salaries that to live on them at all was an impossibility for even the most economical. It was an understood fact that each girl was expected to receive help from some *' gentleman friend." There must be something wrong In our whole 149 HERSELF system of living when girls are compelled to work for salaries Insufficient for even the necessities and arc taught to have tastes and desires for the beautiful which it is impossible to gratify on their meager salaries. A young girl goes to work in an office or store with a definite, If not expressed, understanding of what should be the proper re- lations of the sexes. After she has been at work a short time she notices that her companions arc much better dressed than it is possible for her to be with the resources at her command. She notices that her friends have numerous invitations to theatres and dinners. She wonders if she is less attractive than they. After awhile she receives hints, more or less broad, from her male as- sociates. Gradually it dawns upon her why the other girls are more attractive than she. One who has not been thrown In close contact with the girls of this age cannot realize the ex- tent of the immorality among them. Formerly it was considered that only boys sowed their wild oats. Now we find that many girls do so also. Wc hear very little about It except for the oc- casional case of one who has to suffer for her sins. Usually this one is one of the most innocent. 150 EFFECTS OF IMMORAL LIFE Many of the girls of this generation are " wise." They think they know how to " keep out of trouble," and yet reap the rewards in the shape of a few dollars. Girls cannot afford to take the great risks in- cident to leading an immoral life, aside from all moral reasons for not doing so. In the first place there is the danger of becoming pregnant. Think what that means! The majority of girls are led to take the first step by promises of marriage. Real life has proved these promises seldom are kept The man " changes " his mind after the mis-step has been taken. He goes away and for- gets, the girl is left to bear the consequences of their mutual sin. The men of the world like to take these girls out and enjoy themselves but when it comes to marriage — the man wants a different kind of a wife. There arc three courses from which such an unfortunate girl may choose. One course is an abortion with all its attendant dangers, its risks to her life and the thoughts of having taken a life. Another is to brave the world, bear her child and keep it. It takes a great deal of courage to do this with our present social system. Often it is impossible, as the girl is unable to care 151 HERSELF for the cHlld and at the same time support It and herself. She seldom finds very much encourage- ment in this course. Those who should be her friends and aid her to make the most of her life are now the ones who keep her down. They re- fuse to make it possible for her to earn an honest living and lead a moral life. The third course is to place herself under the care of a responsible phy- sician, live in seclusion for the last few months of her pregnancy, then, after the birth of her baby, have it adopted. Considering everything, this often is the best course. From the child's stand- point, it is given a better start in life. It is much better to live as the adopted, but honored, child in a home than it is to have to bear the stigma of illegitimacy. As soon as the child enters school the latter will become known among Its playmates and will be the subject of many cruel taunts. It is not fair to the innocent child to give it such a heritage. But think how the mothers must feel to have to give up their babies I That is the saddest part of the case. It is not fair that the girl should be punished the remainder of her life for one mis-step when the man goes absolutely 152 EFFECTS OF IMMORAL LIFE free and without the sign of a stigma attached to him. These cases of unfortunate girls are all too common. The rescue homes in the large cities are full, and often a large percentage of their occu- pants are from the country. Within the last week, I have received letters from four girls, sim- ilar to the one I shall read ycu. This letter is from a girl in Indiana who gives a rural delivery address. " In one of your articles in you speak of homes where unfortunate girls are sheltered and taken care of and I should like to know if there is such a home in Indianapolis. If there is, will you kindly give me the street and number. I am in trouble and have nowhere to go, but knowing you to be a friend to unfortunate girls who met their misfortune through ignorance and with no desire to do wrong, I write you for advice." This, as well as numerous other letters, show that these things are just as prevalent in the country districts as in the cities. So many girls do not realize how easy it is to " get into trouble." A short time ago I had a confinement case that was a little unusual; for the ^S3 HERSELF young woman, who was unmarried, had an un- ruptured hymen, which contained only one small opening barely large enough to insert a sound the size of a slate pencil. At the first consultation several months previous, when she had come to me on account of absence of menstruation for three months, the girl had insisted that there was no pos- sibility of her being pregnant. Later she admitted that four months previously, just after she men- struated, she was out with a young man who was very insistent, that she did not consent, but in spite of her resistance there was a discharge thrown against the labia (external organs). At the time of this first examination she was about four months pregnant and had not supposed such a condition of affairs possible. Fortunately in this case there was an early marriage. Another grave danger to the girl who indulges in immoral practices is the possibility of contract- ing one of the black plagues. You know what that wonld mean. If you recall the prevalence of these diseases you will see that the probabilities arc that any girl indulging in immoral relations wil soo»er or later contract one of these diseases. 154 EFFECTS OF IMMORAL LIFE Indeed she runs a big risk of contracting one at her first mis-step. After one has taken the first mis-step it Is very- easy to take the next. One step often leads to another until the girl succumbs to a life of prostitu- tion. A result of prostitution that Is Important is the unfitting for regular life. Whatever the effect of such a life may be upon a man, a girl can- not lead such a life with impunity. Many a girl tires of her immoral life and gladly would turn to something else but the difficulties in her way are numerous. One is her inability to obtain a position when it is known that she has led an immoral life. Another is that she finds the duties and regular hours Incident to any position very irksome. The irregular life she has led has unfitted her for a regular life. There seems to have been a general disturbance of the whole nervous system, her will has become so weakened that it is very hard for her to have the will power necessary to keep from returning to the old life. This breaking of the will power also makes it difficult for her to keep her mind on her work. Then, too, she resents any supervision of her work. Of course, the ^5S HERSELF longer the irregular life has continued the harder it is to break, away from it. Now, from another standpoint ! No matter how dissipated a man may be he wants his bride to be pure. Nearly all girls expect to marry sometime, and so for the sake of the future — in order to keep the confidence of her husband as well as for the sake of not taking any risks that might prevent future motherhood, girls should not lead immoral lives, 156 CHAPTER XVIII FLIRTATIONS AND THEIR RESULTS The greater social freedom of the present gen- eration without adequate preparation has resulted in an increasing tendency among young girls to make chance acquaintances and perhaps clandes- tine engagements. That these flirtations, entered into so innocently, may result in events that will be the cause of life-long regret is seldom realized by a young girl. Yet very often such is the case 1 One letter I received says, " I will give you a short outline of my life since last April when my troubles began, for which I blame my parents partly, because I was not allowed to have my friends at my home or go out with young men, as the other girls do, with my parents' knowledge of it and because I was kept ignorant of the things I think every girl should know. I was nineteen last March. The men say I am the kind that looks good to men, that they cannot resist. As to 157 HERSELF this I do not know, but I do know that I always attract their attentions and I am sorry that I do. And yet I crave them. I have for years and I am lonesome without them. I want their friendship and company. I do not know why it is but I am more satisfied with the boys than the girls. Last April a young man, somewhere in the thirties, I think, though he looked much younger, came to our little country town. He was handsome, well educated, finely dressed and always seemed to have plenty of money. I was very unhappy about this time over my troubles at home and because my boy friend, who always had been a friend through all, had for some cause unknown to mc stopped writing to me. So I met the young man first in company with friends a couple of times, then he wished to make an appointment to meet me alone and, through the kindness of my friends, I met him out at night several times. On the third night before I half realized what I was doing I had let him ruin mc. I had never been told that this was wrong and yet I seemed to know that it was. It worried mc, but there was no one I could go to for advice and my friend said that since what was done already could never be undone I might as 158 FLIRTATIONS AND THEIR RESULTS well keep It up, etc. Having no advice but his, I followed It and for several weeks met him out any and every where and time I could. I knew of the trouble that might come from these meetings and asked my friend about It but he said that everything was all right, that he would tend to that and that nothing would happen. But It did happen. He was going away In a few days and gave me some medicine to take, telling me I was only held back on account of It being the first time. But I didn't believe him and went to a married lady whom I had known but a short time but whom I thought I could trust and who would help me. She Invited my friend and me there one evening and talked the matter over with us or rather with him. He stayed over and helped me out of my trouble. But my health has never been the same since. Now, what I want to ask you is this, do you think It would be right for me to marry any man, with him thinking that I am good or Innocent? Do men expect that of the women they marry? But I do not wish to marry If I can help It, but I must do something. I will go crazy if I stay here at home from worrying over what I have done and for fear my parents will 159 HERSELF find it out. What I wish to do is to go away to work, but I have no one to go to and am afraid I cannot resist the temptations that they say come to every working girl. I have given in twice since my trouble, both times shortly afterwards. The first because I could not help it and the second because I was afraid of being told on, he having been told by the first man. But when I found out I could not resist the teasing I quit going out and it has been months smce I have been out with a man and I am trying to lead a decent life but it is hard and at times it seems that I must give in. Now, please write and tell m.e just exactly what you think of my case. Has my whole life been ruined by this man? " Unless this girl will " play soldier " and " right about face " she is in danger of landing in a house of ill-fame. How common is her story 1 Girls do not realize what are the possible results that may follow an innocent flirtation. Young girls are not posted and they do not know men. They do not realize the pressure that will be brought to bear upon them. Many young girls grow to womanhood without any idea of the relations ol the sexes. To them, love is devoid of ideas of I 60 FLIRTATIONS AND THEIR RESULTS sex, practically the same as their love for a brother or sister. It is not until they are thrown alone in the company of some older man that they suddenly awaken to a realization of what it all means. The girls who like to be petted, to be kissed and hugged can see no harm in that and do not realize what a sleeping force may be aroused. The man, when he finds a girl will allow these attentions, thinks that she knows what they may lead to and naturally assumes that she is willing, but only wishes to be coaxed. It is a clear case of mis- understanding on both sides. But that does not make the consequences any less harmful. Girls do not realize what kind of an Impression they make upon men by their clothes, actions, etc. An eminent lawyer said to me recently, " Why do you not tell girls what real men think of them when they appear on the streets with painted faces, peek-a-boo waists and thin, silk hose worn with shoes more appropriate for the ball-room? if girls imitate the demi-monde In their dress they must expect to be treated accordingly." There is in every girl's nature a desire to appear attractive in the eyes of those of the opposite sex and this desire leads them to extremes of dressing. These i6i HERSELF extremes of dressing naturally attract the attention of men, and the girls feel flattered and continue in their course, not realizing what impression the men really get. Then, when the man makes the ad- vances that her manner of dressing has led him to believe he can make, she feels insulted and re- sentful. The fault lies In the fact that the girl has not been properly educated and has received exag- gerated and entirely wrong ideas of life. 162 CHAPTER XIX WHITE SLAVERY During the past few years the public has been much interested in the prosecution of the white slave investigation. Every adult person had a more or less definite idea that there were in exist- ence immoral houses. But the majority of women had no idea that their existence should be of any especial interest to them. The Hon. Edwin Sims, U. S. District Attorney, Chicago, says: "There are some things so far removed from the lives of normal, decent people as to be simply unbelievable by them. The ' white slave ' trade of to-day is one of these incredible things. The calmest, simplest statements of its facts are almost beyond the comprehension of be- lief of men and women who are mercifully spared from contact with the dark and hideous secrets of the ' under-world ' of the big cities. " Naturally, wisely, every parent who reads this 163 HERSELF statement will at once raise the question : ' What excuse is there for the open discussion of such a re- volting condition of things? What good is there to be served by flaunting so dark and disgusting a subject before the family circle?' Only one — and that is a reason and not an excuse 1 The re- cent examination of more than two hundred ' white slaves ' by the office of the U. S. District Attor- ney at Chicago has brought to light the fact that literally thousands of innocent girls from the coun- try districts are every year entrapped into a life of hopeless slavery and degradation because parents in the country do not understand conditions as they exist and how to protect their daugh- ters from the ' white slave ' traders who have re- duced the art of ruining young girls to a national and international system. I sincerely believe that nine-tenths of the parents of these thousands of girls who are every year snatched from lives of decency and comparative peace and dragged un- der the slime of an existence in the ' white slave world ' have no idea that there is really a trade in the ruin of girls as much as there is a trade in cattle or sheep or other products of the farm, 164 WHITE SLAVERY " I have no disposition to add a single word to what will open the eyes of parents to the fact that white slavery is an existing condition — a system of girl hunting that is national and inter- national in its scope, that it literally consumes thou- sands of girls — clean, innocent girls — every year; that it is operated with a cruelty, a barba- rism that gives a new meaning to the word fiend; that it is an imminent peril to every girl in the country who has a desire to get into the city and taste its excitement and pleasures." One of the worst obstacles to be overcome in the work of protecting innocent girls and restor- ing to useful lives those who have been betrayed, is the blind incredulity on the part of a large per- centage of the public. There are thousands of women all over the country who know as little about what is going on in the world as do so many children. They are wonderfully ignorant of the terrible conditions that are in existence all around them. Of course their blindness to these awful conditions makes them more peaceful and con- tented for the time being than they possibly could be if they realized the temptations and perils that are lying in wait for their daughters and the daugh- 165 HERSELF ters of their friends. But this peace is not per- manent and every year thousands of mothers are rudely awakened from their sleep of peace to find that while they were asleep to the perils of the world their daughters have been drawn Into the whirlpool. The awakening of such parents comes too late usually to do any good. The re- cent agitation along this line has caused many a mother to exclaim, " How terrible; I did not dream that such a condition of affairs could exist In this country." If you possessed a rare jewel and knew you were surrounded by those who would try to obtain possession of that jewel you would not entrust it to a blind or a deaf watchman or one so Ignorant of the wiles of the robbers that he would trust- ingly allow It to pass into their possession. There is nothing In the world so priceless to the father and mother as the virtue and happiness of their daughter. And yet there are thousands of parents who have been entrusted with the care of a daugh- ter who are trying to discharge that trust with their eyes blinded and their ears closed. They In- sist upon keeping the childish belief that there Is no real danger threatening their daughter. These 166 WHITE SLAVERY parents do not live in the world. They fold their hands and raise their eyes towards heaven and cry, " Peace ! Peace ! " and are unable to see the enemy slipping upon their daughter to drag her down to a life of shame. In this age no young girl is beyond temptation. She needs all the protection possible, and in order to protect her the parents must be awake to the dangers and provided with the best means of pro- tection. One of the things hardest to make hon- est and trusting parents believe is that there can be people in the world who make it their business to lead girls into a life of shame. But such is the case whether we believe it or not. The men and women who ply this trade lay their plans more carefully and employ more artifices than can be conceived of by the ordinary parent. The wonder is that not more are caught in the net. Another fact which the public finds it hard to believe is that the girls who are lured into the life of shame find it impossible to escape from such a life, that they are prisoners and slaves in every sense of the word. The artifices employed by these slave-dealers to obtain their victims are many and frequently arc 167 HERSELF so adroitly formulated as to blind not only the victim but her parents as well. One common trick of these slave procurers is the promise of a good position. Many a girl has gone to the cities thinking she had obtained a definite and desirable position. Perhaps she was to be met at the station by the person who ob- tained the position for her. Too late she finds her position is in a house of ill-fame. So common has this trick become that in every large city there are organizations of social workers who offer through the churches to look up the desirability of any position which has been obtained by a girl so that should it prove to be a lure of the de- stroyer she could be warned before it was too late. Another favorite device of the white slaver for landing victims is the runaway marriage trick. The alleged summer resorts and excursion centers which are so widely advertised as Gretna Greens and as places where the usual legal and oflicial formalities preliminary to respectable marriage are reduced to the minimum are star recruiting stations for the white slave traffic. So common is this trick that a wise mother would refuse to allow her daughter to visit one of these places or to go on one i68 WHITE SLAVERY of the pleasure excursions unless accompanied by some older member of the family. Also, every mother should teach her daughter that any man who proposed such a marriage was to be looked upon with suspicion, and should not be trusted for an instant. Then there is the restaurant trick. The girl is induced to go to what she thinks is a restaurant and then perhaps is taken into a private room only to find that this room leads to her prison. Girls cannot be too suspicious of going to unknown places with comparative strangers — either men or women. The moving picture shows furnish to these slavers another opportunity of misleading girls. These shows naturally attract children and very young girls. Evidence has been procured which proves that many girls owe their ruin to frequent- ing them. As an instance of this, three girls met as many young men at a moving picture show and at the end of the performance were induced to leave the theater by a side door which was found to open into an adjoining building and all passed the night together. The massage parlors and manicure parlors upon 169 HERSELF investigation proved to have been used as a bait for these vile procurers. Many of these places were found to be not equipped for their legitimate work but to be nothing more than disorderly houses. The investigations of the United States courts have resulted in the imprisonment of many of these panders but there are many more still un- convicted and the danger to young girls is ever present. The parents cannot be too watchful in their protection, and to be watchful they must be cognizant of the dangers and of the methods in use. The daughters must be so educated that they are prepared to cope with the enemy. Remember, as Browning says, " Ignorance is not innocence, but sin." 170 CHAPTER XX THE NEED OF EARLY INSTRUCTION OF BOYS I HAVE made so emphatic the necessity of early and proper instruction of girls and I have shown you that so much of the disease and unhappiness in the world Is due to this lack of instruction that I do not believe any of your daughters ever will say, " Why was I not told these things before it was too late?" But you women will have sons as well as daughters and you are just as respon- sible for their future happiness as you are for that of your daughters. Besides the future happiness of another woman's daughter depends In a large measure upon the health of your son. The boys need instruction as much If not more than do the girls; at any rate they need It earlier than the girls do, because boys talk more freely than girls and boys acquire their first impressions of these sub- jects much earlier than girls. No boy ever willfully contracted a disease that 171 HERSELF would produce so much future misery as that re- sulting from one of the venereal diseases. You re- member I made the remark tliat the large per- centage of men contracted these diseases before their twentieth year, before they had any adequate knowledge of the possible consequences. If boys were warned there would be no more of this inno- cent acquisition of disease. Many a man has had cause to regret all his life a few moments of thoughtless dissipation. Even though a boy has acquired one of these diseases that is no reason why he should suffer from it th^^. remainder of his life any more than that he constantly should suffer from an attack of smallpox. One difference at the present time is that the smallpox patient receives the most scientific treatment procurable, but the victim of one of these plagues is neglected. Boys are told these diseases are no worse than a cold and so do not realize the necessity for prompt and adequate treatment. The ordinary boy treats himself, following the advice of some of his friends or some incompetent person. He has a feeling of shame which prevents him from going to the fam- ily physician, who would give him honest advice. If he goes to any physician he usually goes to some 172 EARLY INSTRUCTION OF BOYS advertising physician who claims to be a " men specialist." The main speciality of these men is obtaining money from their ignorant dupes. Their advertisements would make nearly every man in the world think he were suffering from some grave disease. The young boy, at an Im- pressionable age, Is a ready victim to their lures. He is treated for a real or an Imaginary disease until his money Is all gone, then he Is discharged. Let me read you a letter I received from a young boy which will illustrate my meaning: " I read your article ' A Father's Duty to His Son,' In the and take the liberty of writing to you. My father died when I was but nine years old, so I was left to my own resources, the result being I am now a nervous wreck at the age of nineteen. I have doctored for nervous debility with four doctors for over a year and a half. The result, they got every cent out of me but did not help me a particle. If my mother ever found it out, It would worry her to death, as she has hopes In mc, fool that I was. My condition, I am always nervous when In company, expecting somebody to accuse me any minute. My eyes always are blurred and my hands shake as if I were an old 173 HERSELF man. I have night losses, which bother me more than anything and if they stopped I know 1 could fight my way back, to health. If you could possibly give me some recipe or advice it would be greatly appreciated. Nobody but one in this con- dition can imagine the strain on the mind and body. Although I feel well when alone, though awfully weak, I am a nervous wreck when in the presence of others. I have written to you because your article seems to tell facts which I know to be true." Now, if you will pardon me I will quote a portion of my reply: " Evidently you have been the victim of unscrupulous doctors. Unfor- tunately there are a number. They usually adver- tise themselves as specialists in diseases of men. A reliable physician does not advertise. If you had gone to a trustworthy family physician in the first place you would have been saved much worry, and incidentally considerable money. " The chief advice you need is to stop worrying. The night losses you mention are a natural condi- tion. They occur with nearly every normal man who is living a continent life. Even if they occur two or three times a week they do not indicate any di«iased condition. The more you worry and 174 EARLY INSTRUCTION OF BOYS think about such things the more often they will occur. I do not know what your occupation is, but if it is indoor work you must plan to take a great deal of outdoor exercise every day. If you could go out in the country for awhile and do hard outdoor work it would be the best thing for you. Eat only plain, easily digested food, but cat plenty. Do not use any condiments nor stim- ulants. Sleep on a hard bed with plenty of fresh air in the room. Bathe the external genitals with cold water night and morning. . . . The fact that you have abused yourself in the past need not prevent you from being a perfectly healthy person now if you are not continuing the practice.'* Every boy desires to be a man but does not quite understand the meaning of the word. He dislikes to be called a " greeny " or anything that suggests that he is young and inexperienced. Often he pretends to know things he does not. Nearly every boy, at an early age, is thrown in contact with low-minded persons who think it amusing to persuade the youth to prove he knows indecent things. He thinks it a test of manhood to be acquainted with various vices and so in order to prove his knowledge is led into various indiscre- 175 HERSELF > tions, which result in the contraction of vile habits or of loathsome diseases. If a boy at an early age were given the true idea of the meaning of being a man or of man- hood we would have fewer physical wrecks and incompetent individuals. 176 CHAPTER XXI WHY BOYS GO ASTRAY " What can a boy do, and where can a boy stay. If he is always told to get out of the way? He cannot sit here, and he must not stand there, The cushions that cover that fine rocking chair Were put there, of course, to be seen and admired; A boy has no business to ever be tired. The beautiful roses and flowers that bloom On the floor of the darkened and delicate room Are made not to walk on — at least, not by boys; The house is no place, anyway, for their noise, Yet boys must walk somewhere, and what if their feet, Sent out of their houses, sent into the street, Should step round the corner and pause at the door Where other boys' feet have paused often before; Should pass the gateway of glittering light. Where jokes that are merry and songs that are bright Ring out a warm welcome with flattering voice. And temptingly say, * Here's a place for the boys.* Ah, what if they should? What if your boy or mine Should cross o'er the threshold which marks out the line 177 HERSELF Twixt virtue and vice, 'twixt pureness and sin, And leave all his innocent boyhood within? Oh, what if they should, because you and I While the days and the months and the years hurry by, Are too busy with cares and with life's fleeting joys To make round our hearthstone a place for the boys? There's a place for the boys. They'll find it somewhere; And if our own homes are too daintily fair For the touch of their fingers, the tread of their feet, They'll find it, and find it, alas, in the street, 'Mid the gilding of sin and tt.e glitter of vice; And with heartaches and longings we pay a dear price For the getting of gain that our lifetime employs, If we fail to provide a good place for the boys." This little poem, published anonymously in a country newspaper, seems to mc to tell the story of why boys go astray. They are not understood at home and so naturally go where someone seems to understand and want them. In a great many homes the boy's room is a very unattractive place, merely a place in which to sleep. He Is not allowed In the " parlor." He always seems to be In the way. No one seems to take any Interest In the things that are closest to his heart. It Is only natural that he should gradually drift to the saloon, the billiard room, the 178 WHY BOYS GO ASTRAY questionable houses, because he is made to feel that he is welcome there. Indeed his tastes and desires arc consulted there. A boy always is interested in sex problems. The vulgar delight in feeding his fancy, in giv- ing him exaggerated ideas of these much abused subjects. He is lead on from one step to another. Often many of the things he does are performed in a spirit of bravado, simply because he does not wish to appear " green." From one of the reliable magazines comes this information: "Forty-one families — 'nice fam- ilies,' as we call them — were last May thrown into consternation and humiliation by being pri* vately notified by the head master of a boys' school that their boys would not be reentered for another term at his school. ' A fearful condition of im- morality,' wrote the head master, ' has been un- earthed at the school, and In order to set an ex- ample to the rest of the boys, every boy concerned will be denied reentrance to this school.' •* The * fearful condition of immorality ' dis- covered in the school was, as the head master pri- vately explained, traceable, as it generally Is, ' to one boy, the son of a family of unquestioned stand- 179 HERSELF ing In its community,' and he has involved the othtv boys. " The boy in question was not a vicious lad: on the contrary, he was a boy possessed of more than ordinary good characteristics. When he was brought' up before the head master and the full result of his baneful influence was explained to him the boy was panic stricken. "* Didn't you realize what you were doing?' asked the head master. " * No,' replied the boy, who was nineteen and really a young man : ' I knew it was wrong, yes, but I didn't realize how wrong. As a matter of fact,' said the boy, ' I didn't know what I was doing, and how I was getting the boys into a thing that I now see is more serious than I had any Idea of.' " ' Didn't your father and mother ever explain these things to you? ' asked the head master. " ' Not a word,' answered the boy, and then as a grim look came on his face he said: ' God! I wish they had 1 ' " A pleasant realization must it be to the parents of this boy as they read this sentence in the head master's letter to the father of this boy: 1 80 WHY BOYS GO ASTRAY " ' I cannot but feel that your criminal negli- gence in the most vital duty that can come to a parent is the direct cause in this twofold calamity: first, of the downfall of your own son; and sec- ond, of the downfall of each of the other forty boys, and of the humiliation in which they and their parents find themselves. These are hard words to say to you, but they are true, and I say them not alone as the head master of this school, but also as one father to another, and as one man to another.' " In the growing youth's mind there arise many questions that he would like to talk over with his father, but he feels diffident about asking him. Too often the boy grows up and goes away to col- lege without ever talking with his father about manhood. In all matters concerning his business relations and success, the boy has received careful instruction. He has not been left to work out those problems by himself but is given the benefit of the experiences of those who have trodden the road before. But In this matter so vital to his whole life, he has been left to clear his own path through the woods. With no guide and bewil- dered with the new ideas and experiences that i8i HERSELF crowd upon him, Is it any wonder he loses his way, wanders off the straight path, falls ofttimes into some bog that perhaps was hidden from his sight by surrounding flowers and to which he has been lured by siren music? The father's duty to his son is plain — and must not be neglected. In some cases the mother must attend to this duty and for the future welfare of her son she must sec that he receives adequate in- struction. i8« CHAPTER XXII HOW SHALL THE CHILD BE TOLD? Every mother and every father realizes that there are certain things incident to reproduction that must be learned by the child at an early age. They realize, too, that it is preferable that this information should be imparted by the parents. But, on account of their own lack of instruction, they find two problems confronting them. How and when shall I tell my child are the questions uppermost in many parents' minds. The answer to the first question must depend upon the individual case. At a certain age a baby expresses a desire for something to bite. Before that time we make no effort to force him to bite. Later he finds he can help himself from one posi- tion to another by creeping. Then in a few months he discovers he is able to use his feet and tries to walk. We do not try to force any of these new ideas upon him but simply wait pa- 183 HERSELF tiently until he expresses a desire to acquire some new knowledge, then we aid him and guide his efforts. There comes a time In the life of every child when he awakens to knowledge of reproduction. Then Is the time to give the information. Some children commence to Inquire as early as three years. At such an early age It is not necessary to go Into details, as a very little Information suffices to satisfy the child. Just how to tell the truths necessary must vary with the age of the child. It Is important to re- member to be truthful to the child. When a mother tells the child that the stork or the doctor brings the baby, she sets a seal upon evasion. Some day he will learn that his mother has de- ceived him and that behind her Instruction lies an element of secrecy, and secrecy with its companion curiosity Is the cause of much unrest in after life. The child gathers the Idea that there must be something shameful connected with the birth of a child or his mother would not be ashamed to tell him the truth. Secondly, the child must be told scientifically that this knowledge may form a basis for later 184 HOW SHALL THE CHILD BE TOLD? studies in biology. He can be taught in a simple manner that all nature comes from a seed ; that the mother makes a tiny nest for the seed and that with all seeds it is necessary for their growth that the father gives them some pollen. Until these subjects are put before children and young people with some degree of intelligence and sympathetic handling, it cannot be expected tiiat anything but the utmost confusion In mind and in morals should reign in matters of sex. It seems incredible that our thoughts could be so unclean that we find it impossible to give to our children the information they need on these most sacred subjects, but instead we allow them to obtain their information whenever and wherever they can and in the most unclean manner. A child at the age of puberty is capable of the most sensitive, affec- tional and serene appreciation of what sex means and can absorb the teachings If properly given without any shock to his sense of the fitness of things. Indeed whenever these subjects are taught to the child correctly they induce a feeling of rev- erence for the mother that could not otherwise be obtained. A little child when told that she grew in a nest in mother's body right underneath moth- 185 HERSELF er's heart at once becomes filled with a great love and wonder for that mother. Then later to teach the relation of fatherhood and how the love of parents for each other and their desire to have a child of their very own was the cause of that child's existence — these things seem so natural to the child mind that has not been polluted with vulgar ideas that they excite in him no sense of unfitness, only a deep gratitude and a kind of tender wonder- ment. The great point to remember in teaching these things to children Is to satisfy their present ques- tion and leave the understanding that mother (or father) always stands ready and willing to ex- plain any problems that are bothering the child. So many girls have told me that when they were between six and fourteen years of age they had heard some things about the land where the babies grow and immediately went to their mothers and inquired as to the truth of what they had heard. The invariable answer received was, " Little girls must not talk about such things." That silenced the child and the mother heaved a sigh of relief that the question had passed off so smoothly and easily. 7 hat little sentence has been the cause of i86 HOW SHALL THE CHILD BE TOLD? innumerable mistakes and misery. That little sen- tence marked the beginning of the failure of the child to confide in her mother, the child never again would broach the subject to her mother. How- ever, that did not mean that the child would not receive the information requested; for, as a rule, the girls v/ho told of this incidence also remarked that they had received the information very soon from some older girl and frequently in a vulgar manner. If a mother wishes to retain the confi- dence of her daughter, if a father wishes to re- tain the confidence of his son they both must keep a keen lookout for the first questions and be pre- pared to answer them at the time. Later on the special sexual needs of the boy or the girl can be explained, the necessity of clean- liness and the danger of self-abuse. The need of self-control and the possibility of deflecting phys- ical desire to other channels and the great gain resulting; all these things the youth of either sex arc capable of understanding and appreciating, and the knowledge given early will prevent many physical and moral wrecks. It is the duty of fathers and mothers to prepare themselves ou these subjects so as to have the an- 187 HERSELF swer ready when the child first inquires. There is no excuse for not doing so, for educators all over the country stand ready to help any parents who call upon them. It is possible for every com- munity to obtain the services of a lecturer or teacher who will instruct the parents. The indi- vidual can obtain books which explain all these things simply and plainly. There is no excuse for ignoran'^e. i88 CHAPTER XXIII WOMEN IN BUSINESS If all homes were Ideal and all men likewise, there would be no question of woman suffrage cr woman in business. But this is not an ideal world; all women who have kept their places and stayed at home, kept house and taken care of their chil- dren have not led ideal lives. In too many in- stances the home woman, the little wren, has been deserted for the gay song-bird. The necessities of life have forced other women into the business world — women whose preference would be for the ideal, quiet home life. One must not think that because a woman is leading a public life that she prefers it, that she has no desire for a home and little ones. Often her choice has been the lesser of two evils, — more to be desired than a life, married, but loveless; one in which she must slave from morn till eve and then receive as recom- pense curses and fault-finding. 189 HERSELF Tlie woman who refuses to so demean the mar- ried life as to enter into such a marriage, preferring instead the busy life of a bachelor maid, is to be admired rather than condemned. That she makes a success of her business life tends to show what some man has missed by not proving himself worthy to be her husband. We hear so much about woman entering into business — just as though she had not always been m business. Stop and think about our ancestors on the farms. The woman shared the work equally with the man. He attended to the heavier work, while she attended to that which required less physical strength but more attention to details. The products of her industry often brought as much ready cash as that derived from the sale of the larger products of the farm. Many families depended for the yearly supply of clothes and lux- uries on the money thus obtained from the sale of butter, eggs and chickens. In olden days, too, many a woman derived an income from the sale of home-made rugs and counterpanes. Just how men have conceived the idea that it is only the modern woman who is a money earner, I cannot understand, nor can I understand how some 190 WOMEN IN BUSINESS men expect women to be happy in Idleness. The most unhappy women in the world are the women who have a great deal of leisure time. Many a man objects to his wife taking up any outside work even though It would not interfere with her household duties. This usually is due to false pride on his part. He is afraid of what others will say; afraid his friends will think he is not capable of supporting his wife. Some of these men forget to take Into account the possibility that an accident or Illness may take him away, business failures may sweep away his accumula- tions and then his wife must face the necessity of earning her living. Alas, how seldom is she pre- pared to do this! If, during the leisure time of her protected life, she had been perfecting herself in some branch of Industry, her future would be easily solved. A woman can devote several hours a day to out- side affairs and still not neglect her home duties. Home-making does not necessarily mean that the woman herself must do the washing. Ironing, cook- ing, baking or sewing. She must see that these arc performed properly but the actual work may all be done by others. A business man does not 191 HERSELF attempt to do all the work of the office himself. He employs a bookkeeper, a clerk and a stenog- rapher to attend to the details while he directs. It is the same way with a home, a woman may em- ploy others to do the physical labor while she directs. Then as to the married woman earning money. Let me give you an illustration. A woman has spent the early part of her life perfecting herself in some branch of work, for instance, book cover designing. She marries a man in moderate cir- cumstances and does not feel that she can afford to be idle and employ someone else to do her house work. She is a slenderly built woman and it would be a great tax on her strength to perform all the household duties — for some parts of house- keeping require such hard physical labor that even many men would not care to attempt them. It certainly would seem a very reasonable thing for this woman to devote several hours a day to book cover designing and use the money so earned to employ a strong woman to do the heavy house- work. This arrangement would be better for all concerned; first, the woman would be happier and norc contented; next, the man would enjoy his 192 WOMEN IN BUSINESS home more, for any man certainly would rather come home and find his wife contented and happy and with leisure time to devote to him, than to come home and find her all tired out, and conse- quently cross, with the housework so unfinished she must devote her evening to some household task. If circumstances have given a woman home and children, they always must come first, but this does not mean the woman must do housework if condi- tions permit the employment of somebody to do it. She must do the work for which she is best fitted both by nature and by training. In whatever occupation a woman is engaged she (jhould endeavor to make a success of that work, vo do it a little better than anyone else could; for in every field of endeavor there is joy and reward for always being and doing one's best. The great secret of success is concentration. Too many women waste their energies thinking and talking about the things they would like to do. Every time you talk about the thing you would like to do you waste just that much energy and make your goal less possible of achievement. That which seems difficult before is usually found easy to accomj lish, once undertaken. If you wish to ac- 193 HERSELF complish anything hold the thought In your mind and concentrate ail your powers in that direction. Do not scatter your energies like chaff to be blown hither and thither.. 194 CHAPTER XXIV NERVOUSNESS — A LACK OF CONTROL How often do we meet women who complain of being nervous. What they really mean is that they have not control of their nerves but let them run away. A woman may be of a nervous tem- perament and yet have such good control of her nerves that she never complains of being nervous. This lack of nerve control manifests itself in vari- cus ways. Sometimes it only is a tendency to cry at trivial things or an inclination to despondency — to have " the blues," or to worry over real or fancied slights. Many women waste so much time thinking over things that are past and gone. A visit with a friend loses its joy in the after- thought, for this victim of the nerves lives over again every moment of the visit. She recalls ev- erything that has been said and wonders if a dif- ferent meaning were meant. Things that were said as a joke and originally taken that way now 195 HERSELF are brought up for criticism and pondered over un- til the woman convinces herself of the presence of a hidden meaning. She is not satisfied until she has bent and shapen the original thoughtless sen- tence into an ugly sting. These nervous women are the ones who con- tinually are tormented with the demon of jealousy. If one of them should suddenly meet her husband on the street walking with another woman, what a curtain lecture he would receive that evening; or if not that, he finds his wife wearing the air of one who considers herself much abused. The real facts of the case may be that her husband met the other woman quite accidentally and, as they were going in the same direction, he could not avoid walking with her without being positively rude. In this age men must, of necessity, have business transactions with women. It is a common occur- rence for two men to lunch together in order to have a chance to talk over some important busi- ness without fear of interruption. There is no reason why a man and woman might not do the same, and yet how impossible it would be to con- vince the jealous woman that this was the case. To be jealous is to acknowledge the superior 196 NERVOUSNESS charms of the other woman. " If I cannot hold you against all women, then I do not want you." If you think some other woman Is attracting your husband, wake up and beat her at her own game. Do not sit idly in the corner and complain. You only are making yourself miserable and not trying to right the wrong. A woman who Is nervous usually does not real- ize what Is the cause of her condition. When excitable and irritable and suffering from a nervous headache, she takes various remedies to deaden the symptoms, instead of looking the matter squarely in the face and going after the cause. Many women need a hobby to take up their spare time and to occupy their minds. If their minds are occupied and their bodies kept In good condition by proper care, they soon will gain con- trol of their nerves. If you find yourself getting nervous, make up your mind to overcome It by filling your life so full of work and play that you will have no time to give way to the nerves. When you feel an attack coming on, get busy and " work it off." There Is a class of women who possess com- fortable homes, with a maid to do the work, who&c 197 HERSELF home duties are not confining and who find them- selves with a great deal of extra time on their hands. To these women the days are long and they endeavor to pass away the time by doing nerve racking fancy work or by " fussing " around the h«use. They are not happy and contented, chicfiy because their minds are being neglected — are growing up to weeds like a neglected garden. For such d woman club work is a boon. She should take up some especial kind of work, and devote several hours a day to the study of It. At first this will be hard, for a mind that has fallen into lazy ways is not easily aroused to continual effort, the deeply rooted weeds are not easily de- stroyed. Many half contented women realize this need of mental food but hesitate. As one woman said, "Why, my husband would leave me if I started to work ! " Some men take a peculiar attitude towards women. They would like to treat them as a woman treats her pet dog. The dog is pro- vided with a comfortable home, plenty of food, someone to bathe it and carry it around. The dofr is contented with this. It loves to sleep and cat the livelong day; it comes when its mistress 1'^ NERVOUSNESS calls, and goes when she is tired of it. Unfor- tunately, perhaps, all women cannot be contented with such a life. The woman was given a brain which refuses to be dormant. If it is not required to be used in a useful way, it occupies itself with bad thoughts — it worries and becomes fault find- ing or gossiping. No woman should allow her mind to grow up to such v/eeds. If the circumstances of her po- sition, her education or her environment seem to make it unwise that she take up any work that would bring a monetary reward, she easily can find some charitable work that needs all the en- ergies she can devote to it. If such a woman would take up some special branch of philan- thropic work she would be amply rewarded, not only by the consciousness of the good she had done, but by the improvement in her own health and happiness. There is another phase to this lack of nerve control shown in a nervous tension, an inability to relax and enjoy life. Some people go through the day on such a nervous tension that they are unable to take cognizance of their surroundings. Eventually this tension will manifest itself in some 199 . HERSELF disorder, as headache, nervous Indigestion or com- plete nervous prostration. In the latter case the nerves have been so abused, so strained that at last they are worn out. A rest is imperative I A woman who, if she has a few spare moments, can lie down and relax absolutely, perhaps even drop to sleep, has a better chance to stand the stress and strain of business or of housekeeping than the one who finds it impossible to do so. Try making it a point to he down for two or three minutes several times a day; lie flat on your back and relax every muscle; put every worry or ugly thought out of your mind by thinking some pleas- ant but soothing sentence as, " I am glad I can rest. I will be happy when I arise.'' You will be sur- prised at the effect these few moments a day will produce upon your health and happiness. Plenty of sleep is Imperative for these women and yet so many of them neglect this great re- storer of the nervous system. Frequently these women complain of an inability to go to sleep easily, and spend long hours of the night lying awake and entertaining worry thoughts. This symptom of disordered nerves should not be neg- 200 NERVOUSNESS lected. A warm bath before retiring, followed by a gentle massage, especially along the spine, will, by relaxing the nerves and muscles, produce very good results. A hot foot-bath, by drawing the blood away from the brain, often will be bene- ficial. A glass of hot milk or cocoa taken just before retiring may have the same effect. If the sleeplessness is a result of indigestion a plain diet will relieve. Sleeping upon a hard bed without a pillow sometimes produces the desired effect. Al- ways have plenty of fresh air in the room. Keep the mind free from the cares of the day. If they will intrude crowd them out by repeating some soothing sentence as : " There is no reason why I should not sleep, therefore, I shall sleep. My body is relaxed, my mind is at peace, sleep is com- ing, I am getting sleepy, I am about to sleep." Never take any sleeping powders except upon the advice of a physician, for the majority of these sleeping powders contain some harmful drug, as morphine, codeine, phenacetin or acetanilid. The latter especially is very depressing to the heart and serves to weaken the nervous system. In fact many deaths may be laid at the door of these 201 HERSELF drugs. Treatments to tone up the nervous sys- tem and to Improve the circulation often are indi- cated in these cases of " nerves." Control your nerves, do not let them control you! 20'i CHAPTER XXV A WOMAN IS AS YOUNG AS SHE WANTS TO BE Have you ever thought why it Is that some women are as young at forty as others are at twenty- four? And I mean young not frivolous I It is every woman's duty to keep young as long as possible, but, unfortunately, she does not always know the best way to live up to that duty. Keep- ing young means keeping your body in a perfectly healthy condition and your mind In harmony. With attention to certain laws a woman can de- tract ten years from her age. She can do this by treating herself as a friend and not as a slave. Take ten minutes and think how you could Improve yourself by a little effort. Perhaps some of these suggestions will help you. Everyone needs exercise. Just what sort de- pends upon the occupation of the individual. A woman doing: housework exercises most of her muscles during the day, and if she makes pleasure, 203 HERSELF and not drudgery out of her work, this exercise is very beneficial. It is a pleasure to be able to ac- complish so much, but the housework is not suffi- cient exercise. This woman needs exercise for her mind and for her beauty-loving soul. In her spare time she should lie under the trees and enjoy na- ture or a good book, or she should go to some gathering where she will meet those who will re- fresh her intellectually. Keep the mind open to all the impressions of nature. Love the open air. Fresh air is not a fad, it is a necessity if one would keep young. Occasionally read a book of travel or a biography of some well-known person. Keep mentally alert. An intellectual back number adds years to her seeming age. Nothing makes for youth as a young mind, save perhaps a young" heart. If a woman wishes to retain her attractiveness and not grow dull and uninteresting, she must be interested in the outside world. Make it a point to go somewhere every day. If you cannot do any- thing else, put the baby in the cart and walk a few blocks. Do not say you are too busy. It is neces- sary for your health and you will Imd a few min- utes' outing will give you renewed energies and 204 A WOMAN'S AGE help you to see the silver lining. If possible go to social affairs where you meet people. Invite others to your home but do not tire yourself enter- taining them. People who are boarding enjoy a simple home-cooked meal. It is the " homey " air they enjoy and not elaborate decorations or menu. A woman In an office needs different exercise. She needs to do something that will stretch and strengthen the tired muscles. She also needs plenty of fresh air. A brisk walk Is one of the best exercises for her. Walk part of the way to the office, If possible, and keep your eyes open for interesting things you pass. Use your Imagination in guessing the life story of those you meet. For- get yourself by becoming interested In others, and you will be surprised at the effect upon your out- look on life. It Is not work that makes the busi- ness girl grow old and careworn as much as it is her inability to forget her work during her play or rest time. A business man takes an occasional day off and goes hunting or fishing, but the business girl seldom can afford the little trips that would serve to break the monotony of work. But every day brings Its opportunities for little pleasures that 205 HERSELF arc available. Remember It Is the small things of life that make up its enjoyment. Once in a while at noon go to some especially nice lunch room where you will see well dressed women, where the service is faultless and every mouthful and every moment enjoyable. You will come away filled with such a sense of well-being that you will be able to accomplish twice as much in the way of work. Many business girls do not entertain them- selves well enough. They become so imbued with the spirit of economy that they deny themselves the little pleasures that would make life enjoyable. This reacts upon their work and ability. These people who continually stint themselves never achieve great success. They repress themselves so much that they quell all their best impulses. They never expand. Learn self-control. Anger is a rapid wrinkle bringer. The energy that is wasted in useless worry and tirade against circumstances might be conserved and diverted into other channels that would bring you abundant reward, financially as well as in other ways. Avoid worry, hurry and getting flustered. Plan your work in the morning, then take the little interruptions coolly and qui- 206 A WOMAN'S AGE ctly. You will not be half so tired at the end of the day as you would be otherwise. Be temperate. Moderation does not refer only to the stomach. Overdoing in any way makes for premature age. Do not let yourself get sluggish and indifferent. Here is where the benefits of massage, physical culture and a vital interest in life come in. Youth is happiness! If you would be young, radiate happiness. Talk happiness not ill-health. One certain symptom of advancing age is the desire to talk about ill-health. Discussing operations you have undergone or sickness you have experienced always attracts attention to your age. Children seldom talk about ill-health. An illness once con- quered is forgotten. Another thing, do not whine. The American women are noted for their unpleas- ant voices, which often are too high pitched, show- ing lack of control. Cultivate a low, "well-modu- lated voice. Recently I met a young woman who had a deformed body and a plain face, but I immediately was attracted to her because she had the most beautiful speaking voice it ever was my privilege to hear. As we age in years we are liable to grow careless in our dress, to select colors and styles that are not 207 HERSELF very becoming; we do not take as much pains with our hair, our nails or our shoes as we should. Wc have allowed age to manifest itself in the lack of care of the little things. Finally, if your work does not bring you happi- ness, you are in the wrong place and the sooner you find the right place the better for you. It is impossible to take a race horse and expect to make him a good plow horse. We only would spoil the one without succeeding in obtaining the other. There is a right place for everyone and each one is adapted to certain things and in order to accom- plish the most we must " find ourselves." 208 INDEX PAGE Abortions 89 Accidental 90 Criminal 91 Prevalence 92, ii2 Sterility following 95 Advertisements, misleading 65 Advertising physicians I73 A-fter-birth 83 /^menorrhcea 40 Anatomy of generative organs 1 1 Anus 16 Atrophy of generative organs 30 Backache, displacement causing 36 Fake advertisements concerning 67 Gonorrhoea causing 61 Lumbago, rheumatism, strain 67 Bag of waters 86 Birth canal >3 Black plagues, see Gonorrhoea and Syphilis Causing tumors 4^ 209 INDEX PACK Bladder, openings into 17 Position in relation to womb 1 1 Blindness, due to gonorrhoea 59 Infection, prevalence of in new born 60 Blue baby 87 Blues 195 Bom with caul or veil 86 Boys, need of instruction 178 Why boys go astray 171 Breasts, after menopause, in pregnancy 19 At puberty 24 Cancer, carcinoma 43 Cathartics 5 1 Cavity of pelvis 1 1 Cavity of womb, openings into 1 1, I2 Change of life, see Menopause Child bearing period 23 Childless homes 103 Chlorosis 40 Circumcision in girls 41 Clandestine engagements 1 57 Clap, sec Gonorrhoea. Clitoris, hooded 1 7 Causing nervousness and immorality 41 Coitus 74 Conception 74 Prevention of 109 Congestion from tight clothing 37 210 INDEX PAGB Constipation 47 Caused by retroversion 34. 49 Causes 4^ Cord 83 Cramps during menopause 30 Development of life 81 Diseases of female organs 33 Influence on appearance 28 Venereal diseases 56 Displacements, causes of 33 Backward, constipation caused by 34 Bladder, pressure on 35 Downward, side 37 Forward 3^ Hemorrhoids caused by 34 Menstruation, relation to 34 Treatment 35 Divorce "5 Black plagues as a factor 117 Sterility as a factor 118 Douche, for cleanliness, at close of period 21 In irritation of vagina 40 Drug habit, from patent medicines 69 In constipation 5 * Dry labor 86 Dysmenorrhcea 39 Education, lack of for girls 77 211 INDEX PAGE Egg, see Ovum. Embryo 82 Embryology 81 Epilepsy due to syphilis loi Excesses Cause of premature old age ^(> Causing congestion 38 During early married life 74 Exercise For business woman 205 For home woman 203 External generative organs, description 16 Care 20 Fake advice 65 Fallopian tubes, description, position 14 Effect of gonorrhoea on 57 Removal, effect of, sterility from removal .... 58 Tumors of 42 Father's duty to son 181 Fear, needless 106 Fertilization of ovum 74> 81 Flirtations and their results 157 Foetal movements 84 Foetus 82 Gonorrhoea Effect on female organs 57 Persistence of in later years 57 Prevalence of 5^ 212 INDEX PAGE Gonorrhoea — continued. Prevention ci in youth 63 Symptoms 61 Green sickness 4^ Happiness necessary 208 Headache, from constipation 48 From displacements 37 Powders 69 Heart valves of baby 87 Hemorrhage in cancer 43 Hemorrhoids 47 Bleeding, external, internal, pain from 49 From constipation 4° Retrod isplacements causing 34 Treatment 49 Herb remedies as drugs 69 Heredity, inherited tendency to disease 99 Tuberculosis, syphilis lOO Home-making a study 7o Homes, childless ^03 Girls not interested in parents' home I35 Hot flashes during menopause 30 Hymen ^ ** Not injured by douche 40 Opening in 4* Unruptured in pregnancy 154 Illegitimacy ' 5^ 213 INDEX PAGE Immorality, due to low wages, effects of 149 Among children, in country districts, in school . 123 Due to hooded clitoris 41 Indigestion 52 Inflammation causing dysmenorrhoea 39 Inherited syphilis 62 Intercourse 75 Insemination 74 Jealousy 196 Kiss conveying contagion 61 Knee chest position 37 For constipation and hemorrhoids 49 Labia majora and minora 17 Labor, dry, 86 Duration of 87 Pains, cause of 85 Premature 89 Lanugo 84 Law regarding prevention of pregnancy 109 Laxatives 5 ' Lcucorrha-a 38 In young girls 40 Life feeling 84 Love, misunderstood 132 Lumbago, backache in 67 Lungs of new-born child 87 214 INDEX PACK Maidenhead, see Hymen. Malignant tumor 43 Marriage, education necessary for 72 Fake marriages used to obtain white slaves i68 False promises leading to immorality 151 For convenience, natural 116 Laws not adequate 115 Relation 7^ Science of, successful and otherwise 71 Social reasons for 103 Massage, for constipation 5^ Mating 73 Meatus urinarius I7 Medical, fake advertisements 67 Medicine, doubtful results from 68 Patent 45 Membrane 86 Menstruation, absence of 40 Bathing during 27 Care during 26 Color, odor 29 Composition of flow 28 Deficiency of 4^ Description of 23 Duration of, frequency 23, 28 Lassitude during 27 Pain during 27, 39 Phenomena common to 27 Profuse flow 28 215 INDEX Menstruation — continued. Quantity, time between periods 29 Sign of approach of period 25 Source of flow 16 Menopause, age 29 Bowels in 21 Breasts after 31 Cancer at 43 Care during, symptoms of approach 30 Changes in body, nervous system 30 Duration, diet 31 End of child-bearing period 23 Hot flashes during, necessity for examination. . 30 Relaxation, rest, worry during 31 Miscarriage 89 Modesty, false 1 34 Motherhood, accidental, a science, preparation for . . 77 Fear regarding 106 Natural desire of all women 104 Mucous patches in syphilis 61 Nerve trouble, due to syphilis 62 Nervousness A lack of control I95 Due to lioodcd clitoris 41 Overcoming 197 Relation to intercourse 7^ Neuralgia, backache 67 Causing dysmenorrhoca 39 216 INDEX PAGB Ovary, description, function, position 14 Tumor, see Tumor. Oviduct, see Fallopian tube 14 Ovum 14 Relation to menstruation 29 Division into portions, grovi/th 81 Passage from ovary to uterus, impregnation... 81 Size 82 Passion or sex sense 73 Parents' duty to daughters 167 To sons '71 Patent medicine 45 Of doubtful benefit 68 Pelvis " Deformed in abortions 9^ Peritoneum i" Peritonitis 16 From displacement and inflammation of womb 37 From gonorrhoea 58 From appendicitis 59 Perineum 18 Tearing during labor 19. 87 PhysioIog>' of female organs 1 1 Piles, see Hemorrhoids. Placenta 83 Position of foetus in utero 85 Pregnancy, absence of menstruation 40 Among unmarried girls 15^ 217 INDEX PAGE Pregnancy — continued. Fertilization before 74 Prevention of 109 Premature birth, labor 89 Prostitution, result of I55 Puberty 23 Change in nervous system 24 Hygiene during, school work during 24 Premonitory symptoms, signs of approach .... 24 Preparatory information, necessity for 24 Public cup 61 Pus tubes, see Fallopian tubes. Race improvement 1 1 1 Race suicide, education in relation to 104 Not increased by knowledge of means of pre- vention '13 Rectum, position in relation to womb II In retrodisplacement 34 Regulation of number of children ill Relaxation I99 Rest 200 Rheumatism, backache 67 Dysmenorrhoea due to 39 Sac 85 Sanitary pads 26 Self-abuse 137 Hooded clitoris as a cause 139 218 INDEX PACK Self-abuse — continued. Mental 139 Nervous system injured 138 Treatment 139 Self-confidence 145 Self-control 206 Semen 74 Sex, education needed regarding 72, 12 1 Fundamental end of, over-indulgence 74 Instinct 73 Instruction for children 183 Organs formed fourth month 83 Skin disease due to syphilis lOi Sleep, sleeplessness, treatment 200 Spermatozoon 74 Death due to disease 107 Union with ovum 81 Size 82 Sterility After one birth 108 Due to abortions 95 Due to gonorrhoea 5^ Due to indiscretions, in male 107 Stomach trouble due to syphilis 62 Syphilis 61 Causing abortions 90 Causing epilepsy, brain and skin lesions lOi Contracted from wet nurse 62 Conveyed by kiss, by public ciip 61 219 INDEX PACE Syphilis — continued. Inherited 62, 100 Late symDtoms 62 Prevention in youth, treatment 63 Tears of perineum 19 Necessity for repair 30 Relation to cancer 43 Teas, laxative 51 Tomboys I33 Toxines from constipation 48 Tubes, see Fallopian tubes. Tumor, abdominal, caused by black plagues 42 Absorption of, removal 42 Causing dysmenorrhoca 39 Hemorrhoidal 34 Malignant 43 Phantom 43 Symptoms of, hemorrhage, pain in 42 Ulcers in syphilis 62 Umbilical cord 83 Urethra i? Urination, frequent, caused by displacement 35 Uterus, see Womb. Vagina, description of 13 Discharge from 38 220 INDEX PAGE Vagina — continued. Infection from use of public towels 6o Irritation of 40 Orifice of 17 Vein of cord 83 Vernix caseosa 85 Venereal diseases 56 Vibrator for constipation 51 Wet nurse in syphilis 62 Womb, attachment 13 Cancer of 43 Congestion from tight clothing 37 Contraction of mouth 39 Inflammation from displacements 37 Position, size, structure, shape 1 1 Over work causing congestion 38 Wild oats, sown by girls 150 White slavery 163 Women in business 189 Worry , an abuse I43 Your t, obtainable 203 221 By E. B. Lowry, M.D. HIMSELF TALKS WITH MEN CONCERNING THEMSELVES This is regarded by all authorities as the best book or. sexual hygiene for men. No man knowing its contents would be without this important book. It tells plainly- all of the facts about sex and leads to health, happiness and success. A book that points the way to strong vitality and healthy manhood. Every man ought to read this excellent, reliable book. — Philadelphia Telegraph. The best book on sexual hygiene for men and we highly commend it. — Lialtimore American. The more widely this splendid book is read the better it will be for men and women. — Boston Globe. Every youth and man who can read the English lan- guage should study this book. — Portland Oregoninn. A rare book that treats its subject in a common-sense fashion. — Pittsburgh Post. This Is a storehouse of knowledge that should be in the hands of every man. — United States Medical Journal. It is utterly free from hysteria and sticks straight to tht unadulterated truth. A valuable addition to any man'* library. — Spokane Chronicle. It is as good a book as a physician could recommend. — Northwest Medicine. Clear, accurate, easily understood. — Chicago Journal. Illustrated. Cloth, l2mo. Price, $1.25 net; by mail, $L35 For sale by all booksellers and the publishers FORBES & CO., 443 S. Dearborn St., CHICAGO By E. B. Lowry, M.D. CONFIDENCES TALKS WITH A YOUNG GIRL CONCERNING HERSELF A book explaining the origin and development of life in lan- guage intelligible to young girls. The author, who is a phy- sician of wide experience and a pleasing writer, has very deli- cately and adequately treated this important subject Carefully written and should be given to every young girl. — American Motherhood. Every physician should read and circulate this book. — Journal of Therapeutics. Neatly bound in cloth. 16mo. Price, 60 cents net; by mail, 65 cents TRUTHS TALKS WITH A BOY CONCERNING HIMSELF A book containing the simple truths of life development and sex which should be given to every boy approaching manhood. His future welfare demands it. This is the first book to ade- quately and delicately present these truths in language intelli- gible to boys from ten to fourteen years of age. The first satisfactory book on the subject — Health Culture Magazine. Many a mother will be glad that such a book is within the reach of her child—Seattle Post Intelligenc/'r. Atlracti'vely hound in cloth. 16mo, *Price, 60 cents net; by mail, 65 cents FALSE MODESTY THAT PROTECTS VICE BY IGNORANCE The most thorough and convincing appeal ever made for the proper education of the young in matters pertaining to sexual hygiene by the foremost writer on the subject Dr. Lowry's books combine medical knowledge, simplicity, and purity in an unprecedented way. They are chaste and void of offense to the most delicate natures. — The Journal of Edu- cation, Boston. Cloth. 16mo. Price, 60 cents net; by mail, 65 cents For sale by all booksellers and the publishers, FORBES & CO., 443 S. Dearborn Street. CHICAGO By E. B. Lowry, M.D. YOUR BABY A GUIDE FOR MOTHERS This book contains the latest and best approved methods for the care of the mother and baby. It is a strong plea for better babies and every doctor will welcome the cir- culation of this great help to mothers. "This book can be safely and heartily recommended to every- prospective mother." — The Chicago Medical Recorder. "The directions are clear and the advice is sensible." — Nevj York Sun. "This helpful book is in keeping with Dr. Lowry's previously published meritorious works." — The Southern Clinic. "A safe, sane and interesting book which it would be well for every young woman to read. It deserves a wide circula- tjon." — The IVisconsin Medical Journal. Cloth bound. 256 Pages. Price, $1.25; by mail, $1.35 THE HOME NURSE This very useful book gives helpful directions for the care of the sick in the home and tells how to co-operate with the physician in providing for the comfort and cure of invalids. "A sensible look, and it should be in everj' home book-shelf." — Northwest Medicine, Seattle. "Uniting praitical common sense with the best medical knowl- edge, it forms a safe guide." — American Journal of Nursing, Baltimore. "It serves a ver\' useful purpose and is readily understood. Physicians will welcome the circulation of this excellent book." — Medical Sentinel, Portland, Ore. Illustrated. Cloth, 12mo. -^ Price, $1.25 net; by mail, $1.35 For sale by all booksellers and the publishers, FORBES k CO., 443 S. Dearborn Street, CHICAGO o ii I ■. L § ll o *llSS3MNn 3H4 \ THE LIBRARY IMV ERSITY OF C AI IFORNIA Santa Barbara THIS BOOK IS DIE ON THE EAST DATE STAMPED BEI OV\. or CAtlFORNIA 'iien 3ni