bmander Walk XDUIS N. PARKER SAMUEL FRENCH, 25 West 45th St, New York POMANDER WALK A Comedy in Three Act* BY LOUIS N. PARKER COPYRIGHT, 1915, BT LOUIS N. PARKEP All Rights Reserved CAUTION: Professionals and amateurs are hereby warned that "POMANDER WALK" being fully protected under the copyright laws of the United States of America, the British Empire, including the Dominion of Canada, and the other countries of the Copyright Union, is subject to a royalty, and anyone, presenting the play with- out the consent of the author or his authorized agents will be liable to the penalties by law provided. Do not make any arrangement for the presentation of this play without first securing permission and terms in writing from Samuel French, at 25 West 45th Street, New York City, or at 811 West 7th Street, Los Angeles, Calif. NEW YORK SAMUEL FRENCH PUBLISHER 25 WEST 4STH STREET Los ANGELES, CALIF. SAMUEL FRENCH FINE ARTS BLDG. 811 WEST 7TH STREET WALK All Rights Reserved Especial notice should be taken that the possession of this book without a valid contract for production first having been obtained from the publisher, confers no right or license to professionals or drhMrurs to .pfotiuCe: the play publicly or in private for gain or'tHapty. .* I 1*1 ; I In its present fo/rn thi^ % pjay %< is. defeated % to the reading public only, an^np iQ^^rnftatic^' jepresfHtatibn, production, recitation, or pi/Hip 7e?djnjg,;oXJt-adjo'b/-pB^oa5ting may be given except by special arrangement with Samuel French, at 25 West 45th Street, New York, N. Y., or at 811 West 7th Street, Los Angeles, Calif. This play may be presented by amateurs upon payment of a royalty of twenty-five dollars for each performance payable to Samuel French at 25 West 45th Street, New York or at 811 West 7th Street, Los Angeles, Calif., one week before the date when the play is given. Whenever the play is produced the following notice must appear on all programs, printing and advertising for the play : "Produced by special arrangement with Samuel French." Attention is called to the penalty provided by law for any infringement of the author's rights, as follows: "SECTION 4966: Any person publicly performing or repre- senting any dramatic or musical composition for which copy- right has been obtained, without the consent of the proprie- tor of said dramatic or musical composition, or his heirs and assigns, shall be liable for damages thereof, such damages, in all cases to be assessed at such sum, not less than one hundred dollars for the first and fifty dollars for every sub- sequent performance, as to the court shall appear to be just. If the unlawful performance and representation be wilful and for profit, such person or persons shall be guilty of a misdemeanor, and upon conviction shall be imprisoned for a period not exceeding one year."-rU. S. Revised Statutes: Title 60, Chap. 3. TO DOROTHY M90779 POMANDER WALK. First performed at Montreal, Dec. 12, 1910, Then at Wallack's Theatre, New York, Dec. 20, 1910. PERSONS. JOHN SAYLE, IOTH BARON OXFORD. Yorke Stephens LIEUT. THE HON. JOHN SAYLE, R. N. Edgar Kent ADMIRAL SIR PETER ANTROBUS. . ..George Giddens JEROME BROOKE-HOSKYN, ESQ Lennox Pawle THE REV. JACOB STERNROYD, D. D., F. S. A T. Wigney Percyval MR. BASIL PRINGLE Reginald Dance JIM Stanley Lathbury THE MUFFIN-MAN S. N. Price THE LAMPLIGHTER Charles Clugston THE EYESORE Leslie M. Hunt MADAME LUCIE LACHESNAIS Sybil Carlisle MLLE. MARJOLAINE LACHESNAIS. .Dorothy Parker MRS. PAMELA POSKETT Cicely Richards Miss RUTH PENNYMINT Helen Ley ton Miss BARBARA PENNYMINT Winifred Fraser THE HON. CAROLINE THRING Marie Burke NANETTE Harriet Davis JANE Margaret Phillips ACT I. Saturday afternoon, 25th May, 1805. ACT II. Saturday morning', 1st June, 1805. ACT III. Monday evening, 3rd June, 1805. For costumes and the general atmosphere of the play consult the illustrated novel published under the same title by the John Lane Co., New York, and by John Lane, The Bodley Road, Vigo Street. London, W. POMANDER WALK PROPERTIES FOR ACT I. Quoits down stage between Gazebo and tree. Brass cannon R. of walk near river wall. Birdcage hanging outside top window of No. & Extra pipe in corner of gateway of No. 2. KITCHEN TABLE AT BACK OF No. i, AND ON IT Muffins on tray Brass candlestick and candle Kettle (Act 3) ANOTHER KITCHEN TABLE BACK OF STAGE, AND ON if Book Parcels (Act 3) Basket and vegetables Tea-things and tray (Act 3) Baby for nurse No. i HOUSE. I chair upstairs 1 chair down (Downstairs) tray with 2 clay pipes filled Tobacco jar 2 pewters 2 extra pewters on floor Plate and eoin No. 2 HOUSE. 1 chair upstairs 2 down 8 POMANDER WALK. (Downstairs) plate and coin on it Cat (Stuffed) No. 3 HOUSE. I chair upstairs I chair and table down (Downstairs) student's lamp Plate and coin Books Punch-bowl and ladle (Act 3) Coloured wineglass Milkjug * " T M M Lemon No. 4 HOUSE. 1 chair upstairs 2 chairs down Violin upstairs (Downstairs) 2 plates and coins Glass of water 5 bunches of roses placed lightly on, rose bush in garden, so that they can be gathered, and 3 loose bunches of white flowers outside top window (Act 3) No. 5 HOUSE. I chair upstairs Special chair and table down (Downstairs) tray with claret and 3 slices of cake (not stale) plate and coin POMANDER WALK. LIGHTING FOR ACT L (As much light as possible.) All whites, borders and foots full R. 4 amber spots (2 on bridge) R. 2 white olivettes. L. 2 amber spots. Back I white olivette. (No change of light during art.} - o D I POMANDER WALK. (Music starts. After 20 bars cease, and MARJO LAINE enters in front of drop as) PROLOGUE '{Curtsey} Kind friends, to-night we lead you far away From all the turmoil of the busy day, Into a quiet nook where thrushes sing: Into the days when George the Third was King. Five little houses, by the waterside ; '(Indicates L.) Five little gardens, only eight feet wide ; (Indicates LJ Two little oil-lamps, giving little light, And only kindled on a moonless nighi Here the cool shadow of a sheltering tree, (Indicates c.) And here the river, singing to the sea, (Indicates R.) Upon whose bosom, drifting to and fro, The lazy barges slowly come and go. Here the gazebo stands (R.) What's that ? you ask A kind of summer house, arranged to mask ^ Strange goings-on, strange plottings and contrivings, Quarrels, conciliations, wooings, wivings. It is the summer, and the month is June, When roses blossom, birds are ull tune ; Morning and midday, sunset and a moon! (Finger up) II 12 POMANDER WALK. In these curroiin dings placid and genteel, Place ordinary -$olk ^rk6 think and feel, Let them live out their lives, and do and say Just what they like: and there you have our play. (Bows) Where is Pomander Walk? Why, close at hand Out Chiswick way halfway to Fairyland. (Curtsey) (Exit MARJOLAINE. Music resumes, and after 10 bars curtain rises.) POMANDER WALK. ACT I. (Saturday afternoon, May 25th, 1805.) SCENE: Pomander Walk is a retired crescent of five very small, old-fashioned houses near Chis- wick, on the river-bank. On the left of the actor are the houses. They are exactly alike: miniature copies of Queen Anne mansions. Each has a little strip of garden in front of it, separated from the road by an ornamental rail- ing with a still more ornamental gate. Each has its link extinguisher. Three steps lead up to each little door and each door has a beauti- ful brass knocker. Each little house has a little projecting bow window with square panes, on the ground floor, and two windows above. A brick pavement runs in front of the garden rail- ings; then there is a gravelled space; then a lawn, which extends to the river's edge, where it is bounded by a chain hanging from white posts. In the centre of the lawn is a splendid elm, with a seat round its trunk. At the back, Pomander Lane turns off to the left, along Pomander Creek, in which a barge is lying with its brown sail hoisted to dry. On the right, a? the back, are Pomander Steps, leading to the river. Just below the steps is a low shrub. On the right, in front, is a summer-house. The houses are numbered from the upper end, and I 4 POMANDER WALK. opposite numbers one and five are public oil- lamps on wooden posts. In the garden of Number One is a miniature mast, properly rigged, with the Union Jack floating from it. A wicker cage, with a thrush in it hangs outside the upper window. The woodwork of all the houses except Number Five, is painted green; that of Number Five is white, and it is also distinguished by a lovely display of flowers on all the window-sills. At the rise of the curtain SIR PETER ANTRO BUS, a genial but plethoric old ADMIRAL with a patch over one eye, and MR. BROOKE-HOSKYN, a ponderous, slow-moving person, with a rumbl- ing bass voice, both in their shirt-sleeves, have just finished a game of quoits. BASIL PRINGLE, slightly hunch-backed, pale-faced, with soulful eyes, is seated at an open window of Number Four, (upstairs), practising a passage in the slow movement of the KREUTZER SONATA on the violin, and repeating it over and over again, shaking his head with evident dissatisfaction. Miss RUTH PENNYMINT, thin and forty, is seated at the open downstair window of the same house. THE EYESORE, a nondescript creature, clad in a long garment with bulging pockets, somewhat resembling a smock frock t and in a terrible old rough-haired top hat, is fishing from the upper end of the Walk. Presently MRS. POSKETT, forty and buxom, comes out of Number Two, carrying a large and lovely sandy-haired cat in her arms, which she puts down in her front garden, out of sight. Then she bvsies herself in her little garden. SIR PETER. (Up R. c. to BROOK-HOSKYN down R. Whose quoit has fallen over the pin) A ringer! (He looks at all the quoits) One maiden to you, POMANDER WALK. 15 Brooke! Game all! Peeled, by Jehoshaphat! (He whistles with Bos'n's whistle towards No. i. JIM, an old sailor with a stiff leg, appears at the up- stairs window) JIM. Ay, ay, Admiral ! SIR PETER. The usual here, under the elm. And look lively. JIM. Ay, ay, sir ! (He disappears) SIR PETER. (To BROOKE-HOSKYN, alluding to the game) We must play it off. BROOKE. Another time, Sir Peter. It is very warm ; and my eye is out. SIR PETER. (Laughing) So's mine, but I see straight, what? BROOKE. (Alluding to MRS. POSKETT and RUTH) Should we not resume our habiliments? The fair are observing us. SIR PETER. (Shocked) Gobblessmysoul ! (He and BROOKE-HOSKYN hastily help each other on with their coats, which were lying on the bench under the elm. JIM brings a tray with two pewters ', two long clay pipes, a jar of tobacco, and a lighted candle in a brass candlestick. He puts tray centre of seat under tree, helps SIR PETER on with his coat and picks up quoits and pin, which he carries into No, i. Alluding to BASIL) Wish he'd stop his infernal scraping! BROOKE. (Condescendingly) Poor fellow! What a way of earning his living ! SIR PETER. (Calling to BASIL) Mr. Pringle! Mr. Pringle! Ahoy! (Stop violin off.) BASIL. (Stops on a dreadful wrong note) I beg your pardon, Admiral! I was engrossed! SIR PETER. ^ Join us under the elm what? BASIL. With pleasure. I'll just put away my Strad. (Disappears) 16 POMANDER WALK. SIR PETER. (Pewter in hand, just about to drink) His what ? BROOKE. (With great superiority) His Stradi- varius: his violin. SIR PETER. Oh ! His fiddle ! Why couldn't he say so? (Calls) Jim! JIM. (Just going into No. i) Ay, ay, sir! SIR PETER. (Pointing to the pewters) Another. (JiM exit. Raising the pewter) Well! the King! (Standing) BROOKE. (Solemnly) His most gracious Majesty King George God bless him ! (Standing) (Both drink.) SIR PETER. Why, you do that as well as if you was a toastmaster. BROOKE. (Flustered) Nothing of the sort, sir. SIR PETER. ( With a sigh of satisfaction) Ah ! Now! a pipe of tobacco with you, Mr. Brooke- Hoskyn ? BROOKE. Delighted. SIR PETER. (Pointing to jar) St. Vincent. Prime stuff ! and in your ear ! (Sits) smuggled ! BROOKE. No ! reely ? (They light their pipes simultaneously at the candle, talking meanwhile. Both seated.) SIR PETER. Was you at a banquet again last night, Brooke ? BROOKE. (Indifferently) Yes yes. The Guild- hall. All the haut ton! SIR PETER. Lucky (Lighting his pipe) Lucky dog ! Turtle, eh ? BROOKE. (Wearily) As usual. Believe me, personally I should prefer seclusion and medita- tion; but my friends are good enough to insist. Only last night, Fox (With immense importance, POMANDER WALK. 17 and with his eye on SIR PETER) my good friend, the Right Honourable Charles James Fox said, " Brooke, my boy " just like that " Brooke, my boy, what would our banquets be without you ? " SIR PETER. (Impressed) Gobblessmysoul ! What's your average? BROOKE. I am sorry to say, I usually have to wrench myself away four nights a week. (Enter JANE with baby from No. 3.) SIR PETER. Think o' that, now! By the way, how's your wife ? BROOKE. Cheerful, sir. Selina is faint but pur- suing. We have been in the holy state of matrimony five years, and never a word of complaint has fallen from the dear soul's lips. SIR PETER. Re-markable! And all that time Pomander Walk has seen scarcely anything of her. (MRS. POSKETT begins to come down. JANE goes to L. of BROOKE.) BROOKE. She has been much occupied much occupied. SIR PETER. Four olive-branches in five years. BROOKE. Of the female sex Number four. (Pointing to baby) (JANE goes to MRS. POSKETT.) SIR PETER. And another coming! That's right, Brooke ! Do your duty, and damn the consequences ! But let's have a boy next time make a sailor of him, what? (MRS. POSKETT has come down with some em- broidery. JANE goes out R. u. E. with the baby.) 18 POMANDER WALK. MRS. POSKETT. Good afternoon, gentlemen. (They rise.) SIR PETER. (Starting) Gobblessmysoul ! Sei> yant, Mrs. Poskett. (Business with pipes.) MRS. POSKETT. Oh ! Don't put your pipes away please! I have been well trained. Alderman Poskett smoked, even indoors. (JiM enters. She sits) Can I sit down ? (BROOKE moves tray to back of tree) Now, go on talking. Just as though I wasn't here. (MRS. POSKETT sits c. SIR PETER R.) SIR PETER. Hah hum! (An awkward pause. JIM brings the third pewter) MRS. POSKETT. (Promptly seising it) Forme? How thoughtful of you ! (She drains it off in one long, ecstatic drink) (SiR PETER and BROOKE-HOSKYN can only stare at each other.) SIR PETER. Jim another! MRS. POSKETT. (Bashfully) Oh, no! I couldn't Reely and positively, I couldn't ! SIR PETER. (Severely) We was expecting Mr. Pringle, ma'am. (JiM retires.) MRS. POSKETT. Ah, poor Mr. Pringle! Poor fellow. I was rather alarmed when he came a month ago. A musician, you know! One never knows what their morals may be. SIR PETER Well, he's quiet enough except when he's making a noise! hahal POMANDER WALK. 19 (BROOKE ostentatiously ignores the joke.) BROOKE. He is some sort of a cousin to the Misses Pennymint, I am told. MRS. POSKETT. (Mysteriously) Yes we are told. But who knows ? I fear I fear, he is sh ! a lodger ! BROOKE. (Shocked) You don't say so! A lodger ! Heavens ! SIR PETER. Why, dash it, you yourself ! BROOKE. (Sternly) The Rev. Dr. Sternroyd, who inhabits the lower portion of my house is my guest, sir ! SIR PETER. Oh ! Ah ! Hum ! BROOKE. If from time to time he chooses to offer my wife a small token of his appreciation, that is not a matter of public concern. (Retires up stage, indignant) \ SIR PETER. (Showing symptoms of discomfort 'at the tone the conversation is taking) Where's 'that cat of yours, ma'am ? MRS. POSKETT. Sempronius ? The dear thing is 'so happy! He's in the front garden, listening to 'your dear thrush. SIR PETER. (Half rising) By Jehoshaphat ! MRS. POSKETT. Oh, don't be alarmed! Sem- pronius adores him. He wouldn't touch a hair of your thrush's head ! SIR PETER. (Sitting again) I warn you, ma'am ! If he does, I'll wing him ! '(BASIL PRINGLE comes out of No. 4 and towards the elm. Comes L.) MRS. POSKETT. You playful creature! (Enter JIM with fourth pewter comes down ) Why, you've a heart like butter. SIR PETER. (Indignant) Me, ma'am! Me! 20 POMANDER WALK. (Sees BASIL) Ah, Mr. Pringle! (Pointing to JIM) Here's your pewter. BASIL. Good afternoon, Mrs. Poskett Gentle- men Thank you, Admiral, but you'll excuse me, I'm sure. I have a long night's work. A- he gets near contents to the (JiM takes pewter back to No. i. the house he drinks off the EYESORE'S disgust.) SIR PETER. Fiddling at Vauxhall? BASIL. As usual, Sir Peter. It is a gala night: Fireworks. MRS. POSKETT. Fireworks! Oh! Ravishing! BASIL. And Mrs. Poole is to sing and Incledon - SIR PETER. (Jumping tip) Incledon? Then, by gum, I must be there ! He was. a sailor, y'know. I remember him in '83. On the Raisonable ! Lord Hervey, and Pigot and Hughes they'd have him up to sing glees together ! Lord ! Did ye ever hear him sing: (Sings very jovially) A health tottie Cap-teinand of-fkers too, and all who be-longtotlw j jo-vial crew on board of the A-ne thu-sa!' BASIL. To-night he sings Tom Bowling. SIR PETER. Ah! (Sings with tear-compelling sentiment) Here a sheer hulk lies- poor TomBow-ling! POMANDER WALK. 21 JIM. (From upper window of No. I, howls) * Here a sheer hulk " SIR PETER. (Turning and shaking his fist at him) Ah, you noisy swab ! (JiM shuts window and disappears.) MRS. POSKETT. (In tears) Oh, don't, Sir Peter! Alderman Poskett used to sing just like that. You could hear him a mile off, but you could never tell what tune it was. SIR PETER. Gobblessysoul ! I beg your pardon ! BROOKE. (To BASIL) Are we not to see the Misses Pennymint to-day? BASIL. They are very busy. MRS. POSKETT. (Demurely) I saw Miss Ruth sewing at a ball-dress. (Slily malicious) Which of them's going to a ball ? BASIL. (Mysteriously) Ah ! MRS. POSKETT. I've seen them making wedding- dresses, and even (With pretty confusion) hehe ! christening robes! BROOKE. (Loftily) I trust you do not insinuate Pomander Walk harbours mantua-makers ? BASIL. (Quietly) It harbours a poor, hunch- back fiddler! SIR PETER. (Quickly) The Misses Pennymint are estimable ladies, and we are all, I am happy to say, like one family. What, Brooke? BROOKE. Um precisely. With poor relations. MRS. POSKETT. (To SIR PETER) Do you in- clude the French people at Number five? SIR PETER. Certainly. They are not French, ma'am; and if they were, they couldn't help it. MRS. POSKETT. (Giggling, and pointing to the EYESORE) Do you include the Eyesore ? SIR PETER. (Indignant) No, I do not! He doesn't live here. If England were under a proper government, he would t>e hanged for trespassing. 22 POMANDER WALK. I have tried to remove him, but ha! it appears he has as much right here as any of us ! BASIL. After all, he never moves from one spot. MRS. POSKETT. He never speaks to anybody. (MADAME LACHESNAIS, a very beautiful woman, no longer in her first youth, appears at the door of No. 5 followed by her daughter, MARJOLAINE, a girl of 17, and by NANETTE, a French Bonne, in a Breton costume. NANETTE carries a basket.) SIR PETER. He'd better not, ma'am ! BROOKE. And I will do him the justice to say, he never catches a fish! BASIL. (Seeing them, and drawing the attention of the others to them) Madame ! (BROOKE-HOSKYN is down L. NANETTE goes along the pavement to corner of garden of No. i (R.) MARJOLAINE with her. All the men rise. SIR PETER whistles. JIM comes across from No. i. SIR PETER indicates the pewters, pipes f etc., which JIM takes back to the house.) MADAME. (Seeing the group under the tree) Ah! Good afternoon! I am going marketing in Chiswick with Nanette. (SiR PETER and MRS. POSKETT R.) She cannot speak a word of English, you know. (Comes c.) Marjolaine, you may take your book under the tree, if our friends will have you. MARJOLAINE. (Very slight French accent) It is nearly time for my singing lesson, Maman. MADAME. Ah, yes Mr. Basil, I fear you find her very backward. BASIL. Oh, no, Madame I assure you. MADAME. (To MARJOLAINE) Ask Miss Barbara to chaperon you, as I have to go out. POMANDER WALK. 23 MARJOLAINE. Bien, Maman. MADAME. (Smiling) You are to speak English, dear. MARJOLAINE. Bien, Maman Oh ! I mean, yes, mother! (Goes up stage) (BROOKE is about to offer his arm to MADAME. SIR PETER brushes past him.) SIR PETER. May I not offer you my escort ? (MRS. POSKETT snorts.) MADAME. (Laughing) No, no ! I have Nanette. Nothing can happen to me while I have Nanette. (Crosses and goes up R.) MRS. POSKETT. (R.) As if anything ever could happen in Chiswick! (SiR PETER follows MADAME up. BASIL goes R. of tree and sits.) MADAME. (To MARJOLAINE) I shall not be gone half an hour. (She goes out with NANETTE, round the corner) BROOKE. (To MARJOLAINE) Won't you come and sit down? (MRS. POSKETT goes up and round to L.) MARJOLAINE. In a moment. (At RUTH'S window) Miss Ruth is Barbara busy? RUTH. She's closetted with Doctor Johnson. MARJOLAINE. Will you ask her to come out when she's done? (She comes to the elm) BASIL. (Rising) Mademoiselle MARJOLAINE. Pray don't move. Barbara will be here in a moment. (Simply) She is with Doctor Johnson. '24 POMANDER WALK. (RuxH and BARBARA appear at the door of their house. From the moment BARBARA appears BASIL'S eyes follow her with rapt attention.) BASIL. (Gravely) Ah, yes! Dr. Johnson I Surely it is very pathetic ! BROOKE. Dr. Johnson ! I thought the old thing was dead. SIR PETER. Oh, she means the parrot. (Sitting c.) Come and sit down Missie ; come and sit down. (MRS. POSKETT promptly comes and sits L. of SIR PETER; he turns; sees her; rises, and goes R. to MARJOLAINE.) MARJOLAINE. (Sitting beside him) I used to be so afraid of you, Sir Peter ! SIR PETER. Gobblessmysoul ! Why? MARJOLAINE. You were so angry with us for painting our house white ! (RUTH and BARBARA come out of No. 4. BARBARA is of that age which is never entered on the census paper; but is still extemely pretty and fresh. Both are obviously very poor, and ob viously ladies.) SIR PETER. (Clumsily) Oh hum the others were green, d'ye see. But it's an admirable con* trast. (MRS. POSKETT snorts. BASIL rises.) BARBARA. (She sees MARJOLAINE and runs to her) Oh, Marjolaine, dearest. Doctor Johnson has been most extraordinarily eloquent. (MARJOLAINE runs forward and kisses her, and both walk about with their arms round each POMAITUER WALK. 25 other's waists. SIR PETER goes up and wanders round to L.) RUTH. (Coming f. c Jer the elm) Good afternoon Direst Bar' ra ! she has just had her hcu: with Dr Johnson Her memories of Lieutenant Ui?,rreb are at their liveliest. (Sits c.) MRS. POSKETT. (L if tree) V :ry unwholesome, 7 think. RUTH. (To BASIL) Lieutenant Charles was in His Majesty's Navy, you know, and dearest Barbara was affianced to him. (BROOKE-HOSKYN is seated L.) BASIL. (C Idly) So hav- heard. RUTH. Unhappily he was abruptly removed from this earthly sphere. BASIL. I presume he fell in battle? RUTH. Say, rather, in single combat. SIR PETER. (L. to BROOKE-HOSKYN) As a mat- ter of fact he was knocked on the head outside a tavern. (He wanders R.) RUTH. But he had bestowed a token of his affection on dearest Barbara in the shape of the re- markable bird you may have seen BASIL. The parrot who occupies the back ground- floor parlour ? RUTH. The grey parrot with the red tail Doctor Johnson. Named after the great Lexicog- rapher in consideration of his astonishing fluency of speech. Doctor Johnson is Barbara's only con- solation. BAI> ,ARA. (Tn gazebo with MARJOLATNE. She ."~ come up with MARJOLAINE, and hears this, to MVRJOLAINE very se.itimentc r ly) Yes, dear. He ^peaks with Charles's voice, (BASIL rises and turns ip stage) and says the things Charles used to say. 26 POMANDER WALK. MARJOLAINE. How lovely ! I wish I could hear him. BARBARA. Ah, no. Not even you may share that melancholy joy. (Rises, but goes back to seat) SIR PETER. (Up R. to BASIL) I tell you, that bird's language would silence Billingsgate. The atmosphere of that room must be solid, sir ! ( To MARJOLAINE) Well, Missie, (MRS. POSKETT rises) We all hope you've grown to like the Walk? (BASIL sits R. of tree.) MARJOLAINE. I love it! And so doesAfaman/ SIR PETER. It is a sheltered haven. (He looks around) Pomander Walk ! Look at it! A haven of content ! What says the poet ? " The world for- getting, by the world forgot." ALL. (Sigh) Ah! (All stand in a line across the front of stage with their backs to the audience. After general sigh of content all move, break up the line, and form groups.) BARBARA. When the sunlight falls on it so, how lovely it is! BASIL. It reminds me of the music I am at work on. MARJOLAINE. (L. of BASIL) What is that? It pounds beautiful through the wall. BASIL. It is by a new German composer. A man called Beethoven. My old violin-master, Kreutzer, sent it to me. (THE EYESORE rises and takes tlw stump of a villainous clay pipe from his pocket, and during the next few speeches indicates that he finds it blocked up, and is unable to make it draw) Ah! these new Germans! They are so complicated ! So difficult. I am old-fashioned, you know. I had the honour of playing under Mr. POMANDER WALK. 27 Haydn at the Salomon concerts. Yes! and in the very first performance of his immortal Oratorio, The Creation at Worcester. MARJOLAINE. Oh ! BASIL. So I'm prejudiced. SIR PETER. I don't know anything about your new-fangled fiddle-faddles; but, by Jehoshaphat, Prhigle, play a hornpipe, and I'll dance till your arms drop off ! MARJOLAINE. (Clapping her hands) Oh! you must teach me! SIR PHBTER. That I will, Missie ! MRS. POSKETT. (To BROOKE-HOSKYN) No fool like an old fool! BARBARA. (Pointing at the EYESORE, who is sucking at, and trying to blow through his pipe) Oh! The Eyesore's going to smoke ! RUTH. His poisonous tobacco! Can you not speak to him, Admiral? SIR PETER. I can, Madam ; but he'll swear back. (The EYESORE is now trying to ram a straw through the stem.) MRS. POSKETT. (To SIR PETER; laughing) And then, of course, you're helpless ! SIR PETER. Not at all, ma'am. I hope I can swear with any man; but the ladies ! BROOKE. Thank heaven! His pipe won't draw! (EYESORE throws away his pipe on stage.) RUTH. He throws it away. We are saved ! (ENTER THE REVEREND JACOB STERNROYD, round the corner. He is a shrivelled-up old gentle- man in a rusty black suit, and a rusty brown wig;. He wears large horn spectacles. He is carrying a quantity of books.) 28 POMANDER WALK. BASIL. Ah! Here is our good Doctor Stern- royd, BROOKE. With his books, as usual. What a brain 1 SIR PETER. Old dryasdust ! BASIL. (Startled) Look! (STERNROYD stops short; picks up the EYESORE'S pipe; raises it close to his spectacles, and shows symptoms of frantic joy.) MRS. POSKETT. Bless the man ! He's picked up the Eyesore's filthy pipe! BROOKE. But why the step-dance? SIR PETER. (Shouting) Doctor Sternroyd, ahoy! STERNROYD. (Becoming aware of the group) Dear me! Tut, tut! I had not observed you! Ah, my friends! (Comes down c.) Congratulate me! SIR PETER. What about, Doctor? (ALL gather round DOCTOR STERNROYD.) STERNROYD. (Exhibiting the pipe) This. A beautiful specimen of an early Elizabethan tobacco- BROOKE. (Just R. of DR. STERNROYD) That, sir? Why, that's (SiR PETER lays his hand on BROOKE'S arm and puts his finger to his lips.) STERNROYD. I do not wonder at your surprise. Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, they are sometimes found in the alluv ; ~l deposit of the Thames. BROOKE. Well, I'm 1 POMANDER WALK. 29 (Again SIR PETER silences him.) STERNROYD. But even my friend, the Arch- bishop of Canterbury, who collects them, does not possecs so perfect a specimen ! MRS. POSKETTT. But Doctor ! (SiR PETER motions the whole group to silence.) STERNROYD. Ah, you don't understand the value of these things. Out of this fragment it is possible to reconstruct an entire epoch. Yes, yes! (crosses L.) I shall read a paper on it. Ah, if only my dear wife, my belovea Araminta, were here to see it ! (He shuffles off into No. 3) (JANE re-enters R. u. E. with the baby. Comes slowly along the pavement.) BROOKE. Amazing! (To SIR PETER) Why wouldn't you let me tell him ! SIR PETER. Ah, Brooke! We all live on our illusion.,. The more we believe, the happier we are ! RUTH. How true! (Enter CAROLINE THRING followed by a footman.) JIM. (Shouting) Admiral! Pirate in the off- ing 1 (All turn.) SIR PETER. Ah? Who's this, now? CAROLINE. (To EYESORE) Fellow i is this Pomander Lane? (EYESORE doesn't answer) Ex- traordinary! (To JIM) Fellow ! is this Pomander Lane? JIM. You've lost your bearin's, mam! CAROLINE. What savages! (To BROOKE- HOSKYN) You! Is this Pomander Lane ? 30 POMANDER WALK. BROOKE. This, mam, is Pomander Walk! CAROLINE. Oh, well, same thing! (Coming L. c.) SIR PETER. (Indignant) Excuse me, mam ! CAROLINE. (Addressing everybody) My good people, I have been appointed District Visitor foi this part of your Parish. District Visitor, to giv* advice and distribute alms. (General disgust. She turns to RUTH ) Where are your children ? RUTH. I am a spinster ! CAROLINE. Are there no children? (Sees JANE with the baby) Ah, yes. (To SIR PETER and MRS. POSKETT) Father and mother, I suppose. SIR PETER. Gobblessmysoul ! (And MRS. POSKETT is speechless with indignation.) BROOKE. This, mam, is my youngest the youngest of three. JANE. Four, master. BROOKE. Four I haven't counted them lately. CAROLINE. I will give your wife instructions about their management. (Crosses to R. c.) BROOKE. You'll Ha, ha! She'll teach Selina! Ho ho! CAROLINE. (To MARJOLAINE) What do I see? Curls? At your age? Your hair is to be quitft straight when I return ! MARJOLAINE. Don't hurry me then, give me lots and lots of time. MRS. POSKETT. (Boiling) Now, Sir Peter! SIR PETER. (To CAROLINE) Madam Hum we give alms, and we do not take advice. You're on the wrong tack. (Pointing to R. u. E.) That is your course for Pomander Lane! RUTH. ] MRS. POSKETT. V (Pointing) That! BROOKE. POMANDER WALK. 31 SIR PETER. Jim, pilot the lady out. JIM. Ay, ay, Admiral. CAROLINE. Very well. I see I shall have diffi- culty here; but I shall come again. I am not so easily beaten. I shall come again! I shall come again I (Exit, JIM leading the way. ALL laugh.) SIR PETER. I gave her her sailing orders ; what ? MRS. POSKETT. What a wonderful man you are! BASIL. Miss Marjory, it is time for our lesson. MARJOLAINE. Yes. (To BARBARA) Maman told me to ask yot; tc come with me. RUTH. (To BARBARA) Shall I take your place, dear? (BASIL starts.) BARBARA. (Eagerly and with her eye on BASIL) No, no ! I love to hear her ! (MARJOLAINE, BARBARA and BASIL go up and stand talking together at the gate of No. 4.) RUTH. (Coming down, to MRS. POSKETT) Will you come in and have a dish of tea ? MRS. POSKETT. (To RUTH and MARJOLAINE) No, thank you. Sh! I'm going you'll never guess! (Giggling) I'm going to comb my wig! (RUTH goes up L.) SIR PETER. (To BROOKE) You won't play any more? BROOKE. I think not, Sir Peter. (Waving his hand to the upstair window of No. 3) Selina will be expecting me. 32 POMANDER WALK. MRS. POSKETT. I wonder you can bear to leave her so much. (RuTH comes down.) BROOKE. It tears my heartstrings, ma'am; but she will have it so. " Brooke," she says, " your place is in the fashionable world." So I sacrifice my inclinations to her pleasure. RUTH. How unselfish! BROOKE. And she has many innocent pastimes. At the present moment the dear soul is joyously darning my socks. (RuTH goes to door of her house. Two bearers have brought a sedan to No. i. LORD OXFORD, a very distinguished-looking man of forty- five, steps out cf it. The bearers retire to the corner and watch the EYESORE fishing, to his disgust. If there is no room for the sedan, LORD OXFORD walks in.) MRS. POSKEXX. Company, Sir Peter! SIR PEXER. Eh ? Gobblessmysoul ! Is it possi- ble? My old friend, Lord Otford! (He hurries up, shouting) Otford! Otford! BROOKE. (Has started violently) Lord Otford by all that's unlucky ! (He makes for No. 3) MRS. POSKEXX. What's the matter? BROOKE. Nothing, ma'am. (With great dig- nity) We differ in politics. There might be bloodshed! (He hurries into No. 3) MRS. POSKETT. Well, I never! (She moves up to No. 2. RUXH, BARBARA, MAR- JOLAINE and BASIL are just going into Na> OXFORD. Ah, you're looking well, Peter! POMANDER WALK. 33 SIR PETER. (Shaking him by both hands) My dear Jack ! My dear old Jack ! Come in ! (RUTH exit into house followed by BARBARA and BASIL.) OXFORD. Looks pleasant under the elm. SIR PETER. Why, come along, then ! (They come down.) OTFORD. (Alluding to MRS. POSKETT, whom they have just passed) I say, Peter! In clover, you rascal! SIR PETER. Dam fine woman what? OTFORD. (Alluding to MARJOLAINE, who is in the doorway of No. 4) Ay, and pretty girl on doorstep! (Arrested) By Jove! SIR PETER. Dainty little thing, eh? (Exit MARJOLAINE.) OTFORD. (Lost in thought) Yes reminds me vaguely (Change) Well! You're hale and hearty ! SIR PETER. Nothing amiss with you, neither. I am glad to see you! Thought you was in Russia. OTFORD. Got home a month ago. Not married yet? SIR PETER. Peter Antrobus married? No, my lad. All women, yes. One woman no ! OTFORD. Sure nobody can hear us? (They come to sent under tree.) SIR PETER. No, no. OTFORD. Peter, I want your advipe and help. SIR PETER. Woman? 54 POMANDER WALK. OXFORD. Yes. Not my woman, though, this time. It's about my boy Jack. SIR PETER. Aha! Chip of the old block what? OXFORD. No, no. Marriage. SIR PETER. Gobblessmysoul ! How old is he? OTFORD. Twenty-three. SIR PETER. Good Lord ! OTFORD. I want to see Jack settled. There's the succession to think of. SIR PETER. (Laughing) You talk as though you was a King! OTFORD. (Laughing) Sc I am, in a small way. Think of the estate ! I want Jack to take the reins. SIR PETER. How can he, when he's on the sea? OTFORD. He's to retire as soon as he gets his captaincy. SIR PETER. (Jumping up) Retire! now? with Bony ready to gobble us up! OTFORD. Don't you see? With all this battle and bloodshed, now's the time for Jack to give me a grandson. Why, hang it, man! If he was to die without issue, the title and the estate would go to that Whig scoundrel, James Sayle. SIR PETER. That won't do. OTFORD. Of course it won't. Now there's old Wendover's gel Caroline Thring. SIR PETER. What! Caroline Thring! I've heard of her eccentric party. And didn't I hear there was an affair with young Beauchamp? OTFORD. That's fallen through. She's an esti- mable person goes about doing good distributing alms District visiting SIR PETER. (Starts) District visiting! (With a glance at R. u. E.) Well, well, but OTFORD. (Impatiently) Let me finish. Wend- over's willing, and there's nothing in the way. The estates join. She's sole heiress. Gad, sir! That POMANDER WALK. 35 alliance would make Jack the biggest man in the three kingdoms ! SIR PETER. Is Jack fond of her? OXFORD. Doesn't object to her. Hesitates. Says he don't want to marry at all. Says he hasn't had his fling. SIR PETER. Well what's it all got to do with me? OTFORD. Ever since Jack's been home on leave, he's done nothing but talk about you. SIR PETER. Good lad ! I loved him when he was a middy with me on the Termagent. OTFORD. He loves you. Coming to look you up. When he comes, refer to Caroline; carelessly. Say what a fine gel she is. SIR PETER. But I've never set eyes on her ! OTFORD. Doesn't matter. Don't say a word about the estate. Refer to young Beauchamp, Say, in your time young fellers didn't let other young fellers cut 'em out. See? SIR PETER. You're a wily fox, Jack. But, heark'ee ! Sure he's not in love with anybody else ? OTFORD. He says he isn't. Oh, there may be a Spanish Senorita! Gad, I should be almost ashamed of him, if there wasn't! But there's no SIR PETER. (Meaningly) No Lucy Pry or, what? OTFORD. (Wincing) No. (Sadly) No Lucy Pryor. SIR PETER. (Contritely) I beg your pardon, Jack; I'm sorry. OTFORD. It still hurts, Peter. Like an old bullet. Well, you'll do what you can, eh? I don't want you to over-do it. Just edge him in the right direc- tion. SIR PETER. Keep his eye in the wind, what ? OTFORD. That's it. (Rises and crosses L.) Well ? Any newcomers in the Walk ? ^ SIR PETER. (Laughing) Yes, two oil-lamps. 36 POMANDER WALK. They wanted to give us their new-fangled, stink- ing gas, but the whole Walk mutinied. OTFORD. Very fine, but SIR PETER. Only used when there's no moon. OTFORD. But I meant people. SIR PETER. People? Yes. A French widow and her daughter. OTFORD. French, eh? (Pointing to No. 4) What, the little gel I saw going in ? SIR PETER. Yes. ( Takes OTFORD down R., away from houses) They're not French; but the mother's the widow of a Frenchman. Madame Lachesnais.* OTFORD. Pleasant ? SIR PETER. De-lightful. The Walk was shy of 'em at first. So was I. Thought they were Foreigners.. All very well for you and me, Jack, but think of Mrs. Poskett! Think of the Misses Pennymint ! Think of the Brooke-Hoskyns ! OTFORD. Eh? Who's that? SIR PETER. Sh! Number three. Very distin- guished man. OTFORD. Man of family? SIR PETER. Gobblessmysoul, yes. Four little gels ; eldest four years old; there'll be another directly. Moves in the highest circles. Hote tonn, Jack. Dines in town regularly four times a week. Never met him ? TFORD. I seem to remember a man called Hoskyn. SIR PETER. This is Brooke hum Hoskyn: with a hyphen. OTFORD. Well go on about the French widow. (SiR PETER sits under tree.) SrR PETER. Well, one morning their chaise was *L-sher-ney, 'fidcPe yllable very short. POMANDER WALK. 37 signalled from the back of the Misses Pennymint Chaises can't get beyond the corner of (Points to it) Pomander Lane; so I had time to put on my uniform, and my medals, and my cocked hat. OXFORD. You meant to show 'em you were Ad- miral on your own f uarter-deck, eh ? SIR PETER. ^Sits beside him) That's it. And th;n well, then Madame c me round the corner, and then M; 'ermersell. They didn't walk, Jack; they floated. And what did I do? I just sneaked back into harbour, and struck my colours. Yes ! She was the most gracious creature I had ever seen. And the gel well, you saw her. They brought something new into the Walk. OXFORD. What d'you mean ? SIR PEXER. (With a touch of pathos) We're rather an elderly lot, y'know. Beyond our spring- time, Jack, and that's the truth. When we sit and think, we think of the past, and try not to think of the future. And suddenly, here was this Grace and Beauty and Youth in the midst of us. It gave the Walk P shock, I can tell ye. All the women lay- to in repairing-dock for days. Mrs. Poskett never showed her nose till she had got a. new wig from town; Pringle tells me he caught poor Barbara Pennymint looking at hersel " in the glass, and cry- ing; and Brooke-Hoskyn says his wife, who was watching 'em come, sobbed her heart out, and made him swear he loved her. OXFORD. By Jove! You make me want to see these paragons. SIR PEXER. Madame's gone shopping. (Rises) She'll be back directly. Wait, and I'll present you. OXFORD. (Moving up. The Sedan-bearers get ready) Not to-day. I'm on my way to old Wend- over. SIR PEXER. (Accompanying him) Ah, that marriage ? J8 POMANDER WALK. OTFORD. Yes, to clinch it. When Jack coms, Peter, you'll do what I ask ? SIR PETER. Yes, yes. Well, I hope I shall see Jack soon. OTFORD. (Shaking hands, and getting into the sedan) You'll do what you can? SIR PETER. (Walking with the sedan till it turns the comer) I will. I will. God bless you. (He turns and sees MARJOLAINE coming out of No. 4) There now, Missie! A moment earlier, and I'd have presented you to a very great man. MARJOLAINE. Oh ? SIR PETER. (Confidentially) I say! We'll have a go at that hornpipe by-and-by what? (He goes into No. i, humming the hornpipe and sketching its step) (MARJOLAINE crosses to the elm* Sits down R. c. opens her book, and reads. Much to the amazement of the EYESORE, a small boat pulls up at POMANDER STEPS. JACK SAYLE, a breezy lad of 23, makes it fast and lands. He is in the uniform of a naval lieutenant, but carries his coat on his arm, and puts it on as he examines the houses. He comes down the Walk, exam- ining all the houses. Presently he is below MARJOLAINE and sees her. He stands quite unconsciously staring with frank admiration. MARJOLAINE sees him out of the corner of her eye; fidgets with her book; tries to read; can't; shuts the book with a bang, and gets up, indig- nant.) JACK. (Involuntarily) I beg your pardon. MARJOLAINE. (On her dignity, very haughty, trying to look sir feet tall) Why? ^ JACK.^ (Laughing) Oh! I'm so glad you said POMANDER WALK. 39 MARJOLAINE. (Genuinely puzzled, and a little off her guard) Why ? JACK. (Good naturedly) Well, if you'd said " There's no occasion ; " or if you hadn't said any- thing, our conversation would have been finished, you know. MARJOLAINE. (Matter-of-fact) It is finished. (She moves to go) JACK. (Holding up his hand) No. It's my turn to ask you a question. MARJOLAINE. Eh? ("hein?") JACK. I'm Jack Sayle, at your service. I'm a lieutenant in the Navy; and I've just rowed down from Richmond three miles. I'm home on leave ; and I'm looking for an old friend. MARJOLAINE. All that is very interesting, but it isn't a question. JACK. (Rather injured) I thought it was polite to tell you who I was. It's uncommon hot, and when I saw this terrace, I said there'd be sure to be one here. Is there ? MARJOLAINE. (Impatient) What? JACK. An inn. MARJOLAINE. Certainly not. (Crosses towards No. 5) JACK. Can't you tell me where there is one ? MARJOLAINE. I do not frequent them. JACK. No? Sorry. I am dry. You see, I've rowed all the way from Richmond five miles. MARJOLAINE. (Resisting a desire to laugh) I'm afraid you'll have to row all the way back again. Good afternoon. (She moves towards house) JACK. (Pensively) Curious, how different everything is ! MARJOLAINE. (Arrested at gate) Different what is? JACK. Why, if I'd met an old gentleman outside his house in Spain, and he'd seen how I was suffer- 40 POMANDER WALK. ing, he'd have said his house was mine. (Silt under tree) MARJOLAINE. (Indignant) I am not an old gentleman ; I haven't any house in Spain, and it's a shame to say I'm inhospitable. JACK. I didn't. I only said it was different. MARJOLAINE. (Hesitating) Are you really suffering ? JACK. (Grinning) Intolerably. (Groaning) Look at my face ! MARJOLAINE. I can't ask you in, because Maman and Nanette are out. JACK. (R. c.) It's of no consequence. (With the air of a martyr) I must row back. Seven miles. Against the tide. Ah, well ! MARJOLAINE. I'm sure Maman would ask you in, if she was here. JACK. I'm quite sure of that. MARJOLATNE. And I think she would not like me to be, as you say. inhospitable. JACK. I didn't say it; but I'm quite sure she wouldn't. MARJOLAINE. I might I might bring you out something JACK. (With assumed indifference) Oh, don't trouble. MARJOLAINE. But what would the neighbours say, if they saw me feeding an entire stranger? JACK. But I'm not. (Jumps up) I've told you my name. That's as much as anybody ever knows about anybody. MARJOLAINE. (Examining the Walk) Number One's asleep; Number two's combing her wig; Number three's nursing his wife; Dr. Sternroyd doesn't matter; and the Eyesore's got his back turned. I'll risk it. (Turns to go in, then comes back) What would you like? JACK. Oh, my dear young lady! It's not for me to sav. Anything you offer me anything! POMANDER WALK. 41 MARJOLAINE. (Ticking them off on her fingers) We have elderberry wine cowslip wine red-cur- rant wine and gooseberry wine (JACK'S face has grown longer and longer. She sees it) Oh, you do look ill ! Which do you say ? JACK. I've been brought up very simply. I should never think of saying any of those. Haven't you any beer? MARJOLAINE. Beer ! How low ! JACK. I know ; but MARJOLAINE. (Contemptuously) We have no beer. JACK. And this is England ! 1 mean MARJOLAINE. I know ! There's Maman's claret. She takes it for her health. (Triumphantly) What do you say to that? JACK. (In despair) Oh, it's better than (Ew- thusiastically) than beer. MARJOLAINE. Ah! Now, will you wait a min- ute (Pointing to bench) Here? (MRS. POSKETT looks out of her window.) JACK. I'll wait hours, anywhere. MARJOLAINE. (Seeing MRS. POSKETT) No! Better! Go into the gazebo. JACK. Into the what? MARJOLAINE. (Motioning him to the summer- house) There : the summer-house. (He goes in) And keep quite still. (She lays her book on the bench in the summer-house) JACK. I say ! You will come back ? You're not going to leave me here to perish of thirst? MARJOLAINE. That would be a good joke! JACK. I'll carve your name while you're gone. MARJOLAINE. No, you won't ! JACK. Why not ? MARJOLAINE. Because you don't know it! Voila! (She trips laughing into No. 5) 42 POMANDER WALK. JACK. (Watching her; pensively, to himself) By George ! By George ! By George ! (He picks up the book. Looks at the fly-leaf) Aha ! " Lucy Pryor " ! Lucy Pryor ! (He gets his knife out and begins carving an L. BROOKE-HOSKYN opens his upstair window; he is in his shirtsleeves and is smoking a pipe. He speaks to someone in the room) BROOKE. What a pity, my dearest Selina, you are temporarily deprived of the use of your limbs. The Walk is at its best. The river is flowing by. What ? It always does ? Why check my musings ? Not a living thing is in sight, (The EYESORE scratches his back) except the Eyesore; and he enhances the beauty of his surroundings by con- trast. My smoke does not incommode you, my own? you can bear it? Dear soul, who am I, to deprive you of an innocent pleasure? (At this moment MARJOLAINE comes out of No. 5 with a bottle, a tumbler, and a cake on a plate. BROOKE- HOSKYN is much interested. To himself) Hulloa ! (To MARJOLAINE) Why, Miss Marjory ! MARJOLAINE. (Nearly letting everything drop and coming to a dead stop) Oh! (JACK is excited. He and MARJOLAINE exchange signals.) BROOKE. Is your mother in the arbour? MARJOLAINE. Yes no ! BROOKE. Indeed? Then why this genteel reflec- tion? (Speaking off) Yes, my own ; I am speaking to Miss Marjory. MARJOLAINE. (As bold as you please) I always take a little refreshment at this hour. BROOKE. How singularly unobservant I am! I have never noticed it. Wait one moment. I'll come and help you. (JACK expresses his determination to kill BROOKE.) POMANDER WALK, 43 MARJOLAINE. (Hastily) No, thank you. I am sure your wife wants you. (Viperishly) She sees so little of you. (She hurries into the summer- house, motioning JACK to keep still) BROOKE. (Leaning out of the window, and try- ing to see into the summer-house) Curious. Very curious. MARJOLAINE. (In a tragic whisper) Did you hear him ? JACK. (Similarly) If he comes here, I'll punch his head. MARJOLAINE. Be quiet ! (They both stand listening.) BROOKE. (Speaking off) No, my dear, of course I didn't mean to go! Do you think her an ugly little thing? Matter of taste. Oh, come! Not jealous! Hold your hand? (Viciously) Cer- tainly, if you wish it. (As he knocks out his pipe and closes the window) Damn ! MARJOLAINE. (Hearing the window close) Thank goodness. (To JACK) Now you see what you've done! JACK. Ton my honour, I've done nothing. Just waited hours ! MARJOLAINE. (Arranging the wine, etc., on the bench) Hours ! JACK. It seemed hours, Miss (With emphasis) Lucy Pryor! MARJOLAINE. Lucy Pryor? Oh, you got that out of the book ! That was Mamaris name before she married. My name's Lachesnais. JACK. (Not understanding) Beg pardon ? MARJOLAINE. (Very distinctly) La-ches-nais. Marjolaine Lachesnais. JACK. Are you French? (He moves tray to his right) MARJOLAINE. My father was. (She has filled 44 POMANDER WALK. a tumbler with claret, which she offers him) Never mind about that. Make haste. JACK. (Holding the tumbler) Marjolaine that means Marjoram, doesn't it? (Rises to drink) MARJOLAINE. (Interested) Do you know French? JACK. (Inadvisedly taking a gulp of claret, which nearly kills him) Brrr! I beg pardon! O Lord! know French? Very little. Marjoram Sweet Marjoram how appropriate ! MARJOLAINE. You are not drinking. It is Maman's claret. JACK. Does she does she take this for her health? MARJOLAINE. Yes. You said you were thirsty. JACK. It's a wonderful wine. Quenches your thirst at once. MARJOLAINE. Take some cake. JACK. (Breaks a piece off) I say! You must eat, too, or I shall fee! greedy. (He breaks his piece in two and gives half to her. They sit munching like children, with their feet dangling^. JACK, with his mouth full) I shall call you Marjory. MARJOLAINE. (Similarly) They all do. JACK. (Jealous) Do they? Who? MARJOLAINE. (Carelessly) Oh the neighbours. (Indicating the Walk with the cake) JACK. Impudence. (He recovers) I say ! Isn't this delightful ! MARJOLAINE. It's very strange. Do you know, you are the first young man I've ever spoken to in all my life ? JACK. No! That's first-rate! MARJOLAINE. (Astonished) Why? JACK. Oh I don't know. I hate young men. MARJOLAINE. But you are young ! JACK. (Rather hurt) Me? No! I'm twenty- three. POMANDER WALK. 45 MARJOLAINE. I'm much younger. Only seven- teen. Here, everybody is Oh ! so old ! JACK. Poor little girl! MARJOLAINE. (Astonished) Why ? JACK. Must be so lonely. MARJOLAINE. (She has got rid of the cake by this time) Oh, no ! One cannot feel lonely where there's a river. (Dreamily) Twice every day it brings news: down from the meadows, where the flowers are, and the cattle, standing knee-deep in its margin, and the demoiselles how do you say? dragonflies and the willows dipping their branches in it; and then it comes back from the great town, and sings of the ships and the crowded bridges, and the King and Queen taking their pleasure in great, golden barges. And it even sings of the sea, so far away! JACK. (Eagerly) Do you love the sea? MARJOLAINE. What do I know of it? I have only crossed from Dunkerque. (Enthusiastically) But that was lovely ! It was very rough, and I stood against the mast, and my hair blew all about, and I shouted for joy ! Oh ! I should love to be a pirate ! JACK. (Catching her mood) Fine! Tell you what! We'll charter a ship, and sweep the seas, and bang the enemy. MARJOLAINE. We ! Why, you're going away in a minute, and I shall never see you again. JACK. (Suddenly brought to earth) Marjory do you mean that ? MARJOLAINE. Why should you come again ? JACK. (Quietly) Think a moment. Let us both think. We are very young, and I know I'm hasty. Let us sit quite still, and think hard, whether we'd like to meet again. Let us sit and look at each other, and not speak. (They do so. Presently her head sinks) Well ? MARJOLAINE. (Shyly) I do not see why you should not come again. ^6 POMANDER WALK. JACK. (Earnesly) I see why I should! I must! But it shall be differently. M ARJOLAINE. Differently ? JACK. I mustn't come on the sly. I'll get an introduction. MARJOLAINE. But nobody knows you ! Nobody in all Pomander Walk. JACK. (Jumping up) Is this Pomander Walk? (MARJOLAINE nods) Why, that's what I've been looking for all the afternoon! That's where my friend lives : the Admiral. MARJOLAINE. (Rising) Not Sir Peter Antro- bus? JACK. Yes ! Do you know him ? MARJOLAINE. Why, he's the King of the Walk! He lives at Number One. If you're quite quiet, you can hear him snoring. JACK. Why, there we are, then ! I'm introduced ! I'm on a proper footing! The whole thing's ship- shape. O Marjory, what a relief ! MARJOLAINE. But I don't understand JACK. Sir Peter's my father's oldest friend. I served under him as a middy on the Termagant. I'm very fond of him. I'll come and see him to- morrow. MARJOLAINE. (Clapping her hands) And then he can introduce you to Maman. JACK. Don't you see ? It's grand ! I'll come and see him often ; every day ; twice a day. If he's out, I can sit under the elm and wait for him with you. Oh ! Aren't you glad ? MARJOLAINE. (Demurely) I am very glad you have found your old friend. JACK. What's to-day? MARJOLAINE. (Without thinking) Quintidi. Fifth Prairial. Year thirteen JACK. What are you talking about? MARJOLAINE. Oh, I forgot I was in England! Saturday. POMANDER WALK. 47 JACK. (Crestfallen) Then to-morrow's Sunday. Hang ! Well, I'll come on Monday. Shall you be here? MARJOLAINE. I am always here. JACK. Be under the elm. (Insidiously) Shall you tell your mother about to-day ? MARJOLAINE. (After a slight hesitation) On Monday, when you've been introduced. JACK. That's it I'll be off now. (Taking both her hands in his) Good-bye. Oh, but it's good to be alive ! It's good to be young ! The river is good, that brought me here ! The sun is good, that made me thirsty ! MARJOLAINE. And the claret was good? JACK. The claret? Nectar! MARJOLAINE. Finish it then. JACK. Oh, no, thank you! (Sees her look of surprise) Oh, yes. (Drinks it off with silent heroism) Good-bye, little Marjory: till Monday! MARJOLAINE. (Wistfully) You think you will come? JACK. Think ! (Muffin-bell heard off.) MARJOLAINE. Slip to your boat quickly ! (She gives a cry of alarm. For the MUFFIN-MAN has come round the corner with his tray on his head, ringing his bell. As if by magic the whole Walk comes to life. Heads are at all the windows. JIM comes out of No. i, with SIR PETER behind him. MRS. POSKETT appears at her door; RUTH at hers; JANE comes out of No. 3, with the baby in her arms; and BROOKE-HOSKYN opens the upstair window. Even DOCTOR STERNROYD shuffles out, plate in hand. All buy muffins) JACK. Dash it! What's that? MARJOLAINE. Keep still! It's the muffin-man! JACK. I'm off! 48 POMANDER WALK. MARJOLAINE. Wait! (She peeps through the bushes. With horror) Jack ! JACK. (Delighted at being called by his name) Ah ! ( Then anxiously ) What ? MARJOLAINE. The whole Walk's awake! Look! JACK. (With his head close to hers) I can't see. Your hair's in the way. Don't move! By Jove ! There's old Antrobus ! MARJOLAINE. (In distress) All of them! All of them! JACK. They're all buying muffins ! Greedy pigs ! They won't see me ! MARJOLAINE. Yes, they will. Let me go first. I'll set them talking; then you can slip away. (Suddenly she gives a scream) Oh! Oh! (MADAME and NANETTE come round the corner. BROOKE-HOSKYN comes out of No. 3.) JACK. What? MARJOLINE. Maman and Nanette! They must not come here ! I can't explain you before the whole Walk! Is my hair straight? (Going) JACK. Lovely ! Monday ? MARJOLAINE. I'm frightened! JACK. (Insisting) Monday? MARJOLAINE. Yes! Yes! (She dashes out of the summer-house f almost into BROOKE-HOSKYN'S arms) BROOKE. A\ Miss Marjory! I'll fetch the things for you. MARJOLAINE. (In agony) No, no! MADAME. (Calling) Marjolaine! MAFJOLAINE. (Throwing up her hands in des- pair) Me voila, Maman cherie! (She runs up to her mother, and becomes feverishly active in keep- ing the inhabitants of the Walk together. BROOKE- HOSKYN comes solemnly up to the summer-house,. andsees JACK, who is peering through the hedge) BROOKE. (Slapping him on the back) So so! JACK. (Turns suddenly) What the devil ? POMANDER WALK. 49 (With amazement) Hoskyn! By all that's amaz- ing ! Old Hoskyn ! BROOKE. ( With the utmost surprise and discom- fort) You, sir! You! JACK. Hoskyn! What the devil are you doing here? BROOKE. (Like a well-trained servant) Beg pardon, sir. (Tries to go) JACK. (Stopping him) No, no, Hoskyn; you don't get off so easily. What are you doing here? BROOKE. (Doggedly) I'm living here, sir. JACK. The doose you are! Well, you're in the nick of* time. Be a good fellow and fetch my hat out of the boat, without letting all those people see you. BROOKE. (Firmly, but respectfully) I'm very sorry, Master Jack ; 1 can't do that. JACK. Why not? BROOKE. I'm looked up to here, sir. I should lose prestige. JACK. I say, Hoskyn, what's your little game ? BROOKE. (Fiercely) What is yours, sir? JACK. What the devil do you mean ? BROOKE. (Pointing to the wine and cake) I mean this ? JACK. What of it ? What do you insinuate ? BROOKE. It ain't right, sir. I won't help you. I'll be damned if I do ! JACK. Do you mean I'm doing something under- hand? BROOKE. Well ain't you, sir? JACK. I'll devilish soon show you! BROOKE. (Trying to stop him; terrified) Don't betray me, sir ! Don't sir ! JACK. (Thrusting him aside) Out of my way! BROOKE. Good Lord! He'll tell the whole Walk ! (He stands and watches. Meanwhile most people have bought their muffins and are retiring. RUTH detains MADAME. The MUFFIN-MAN has got as far 50 POMANDER WALK. as No. 3 where DOCTOR STERNROYD is choosing his muffins with particular care. BARBARA sees JACK approaching) BARBARA. A stranger ! RUTH. (Calls to the ADMIRAL, who is just going into his house) Sir Peter! (She points to the intruder) SIR PETER. (Very important) Now, sir May I ask ? (I'e 'recognises JACK) G bblessmysoul! What a coincidence! (Shaking hands violently) I'm delighted t j see you, my lad ! (MADAME comes slowly down) De-lighted. (To MADAME) Madame Lachesnais! Let me make you acquainted! My gallant young friend, the Honourable Jack Sayle, son of my old friend, Lord (JiM appears in upper window.) MADAME. . (With a cry) Marjolaine ! (^!RS. POSKETT goes to MADAME. MARJCLAINE runs to her mother. MADAME sinks into MARJOLAINE'S and MRS. POSKETT'S arms. Stupor.) MRS. POSKETT. Salts! Quick! (BARBARA runs into house for a glass of water. The women crowd round MADAME.) SIR PETER. (Hurriedly) Get away, Jack! JACK. (Nonplussed) But ! SIR PETER. Away with you ! Discretion ! They'll have to unhook her! CURTAIN. (Picture. MADAME is placed on seat c , the women round her. BARBARA comes with glass of water which she hands to MARJOLAINE is kneel- ing by her mother. The ADMIRAL, with his back to the group, is waving, in the direction of the river, to JACK, who has disappeared.) POMANDER WALK. 51 ACT II. LIGHTING ACT II. All whites bonders and foots full up R. 2 Amber spots R. White olivettes L. None Back i White olivette CUES. Page 81. Jack I am the one girl in the world you can never marry. (Begin to blind spots and olivettes slowly, one after the other.) Page 83. Do you know any bishops? (Spots, etc., are blinded now) Page 85. We want to get married and you've got to get us a licence. (Shower over now and all lights come on gradually.) PROPERTIES FOR ACT II. OFF STAGE R. Drowned cat in net and three fishes Rug hanging on railings of No. 5 Stick to beat rug by railings Cat on stage almost hidden from the audience by the gazebo. 2 POMANDER WALK. ACT II. (Saturday morning, June 1st, 1805.) SCENE : It is about midday; a showery and breezy morning. The shadows shift as the clouds are swept along. The EYESORE is fishing as usual. BROOKE-HOSKYN, in his shirt sleeves, is brush- ing his hair in his upstairs room. The window is open. NANETTE, as curtain rises, is beating a rug which is hanging on railings of No 5. JANE comes out hurriedly and remonstrates, and then JIM rushes out, also scolding her. BROOKE. Jane, Jane. (JiM, JANE and NANETTB immediately scuttle off into their respective houses. BROOKE speaks into the room) But, my own Selina, what was I to dor Be reasonable. I only wrote and told his lordship th bo;' was carrying on a clandestine love affair. I did not even sign the letter. None of my business ? Now, Selina ! If I hadn't wrote, he'd have come again, and all would have been disclosed. We shoul 1 hav? been obleeged to leave the Walk ! Drat the W*lk ?O fie ! That is not how my ring-dove customarily ccos. Soft words butter no parsnips! O Selina! Does my Selina think she's in her kitchen? No I am not a brute. Yes, I know I have made Miss Marjory very unhappy, but we must make people unhappy, if we're to be happy ourselves. I'm sorry for her. Very sorry. She's a sweet creature. (Noise of broken crockery) There you go again ! You scold me for making her unhappy, ^.nd you scold me for being sorry. There's no pleasing you! (MAR- JOLAINE has come out of No. 5. She is pale and POMANDER WALK. 53 miserable. BROOKE-HOSKYN sees her) Ah, Miss Marjory? (Speaking off) I must speak to her; it's only polite. Don't snivel. (To MARJOLAINE) You are looking a little pale. MARJOLAINE. (With a toss) I never felt better in my life. BROOKE. But more like the lily than the rose. (Off) No; I am not talking nonsense! MARJOLAINE. How is Mrs. Brooke-Hoskyn this morning ? BROOKE. In the highest spirits. Her gaiety is infectious. (Oj^) Don't snivel: she'll hear you! (In despair) O Lord! (To MARJOLAINE) Ex- cuse me; Selina wants to tell me a joke High spirits you know high spirits. (Off; impatiently) You really are! (Slams the window and disap- pears) (MARJOLAINE looks desolately up and down the river. Almost makes up her mind to speak to the EYESORE, but he scratches his back at that moment, and her pride revolts. She comes half way across the lawn, towards the elm R. c. SIR PETER appears at his upstair window, hang- ing out the thrush.) SIR PETER. Missie, ahoy ! MARJOLAINE. (Turning) Oh, Sir Peter! You made me jump! SIR PETER. Sent a shot across your bows what ? MARJOLAINE. How's the thrush? SIR PETER. Peaky peaky and nervous. That confounded cat next door's been watching him. Where is he now ? MARJOLAINE. (Pointing to the shrub near the EYESORE) Quite safe. There. SIR PETER. (Leaning out) Where? MARJOLAINE. (Crossing to bush) Oh, I can't shout it! (Points again) 54 POMANDER WALK. SIR PETER. Oh, there? MARJOLAINE. (Nodding) 'M. Are you very busy? Could you spare time for a little chat? SIR PETER. With you? Hours. (Disappears. MARJOLAINE comes to the elm. SIR PETER comes out. Looks under the shrub. Shakes his fist at it. Comes to MARJOLAINE) He's sitting under the bush, watching the Eyesore like a tiger. Shows cats have no sense. Tears to think the Eyesore's going to catch a fish! (Coming down) Ha! Never caught a fish in his born days ! Now, Missie, what can I do for you? MARJOLAINE. Talk to me. SIR PETER. (Flattered) Ah 1 Tell ye what! If we had a fiddler here, we might practise the hornpipe ! ( Takes her hands and does a few steps; she is quiet and despondent) MARJOLAINE. (Anxiously) No! No! Not to- day! SIR PETER. (Looking at her with surprise) Oh ? In the doldrums? MARJOLAINE. (Impulsively) Sir Peter, \vas you ever broken-hearted? SIR PETER. Lord bless your pretty eyes, yes; every time I left port ! MARJOLAINE. Oh, but did the world seem like an empty husk, and did you want to sit down and cry your eyes out? SIR PETER. Well, ye see, I could only have crfed one eye out, anyhow. MARJOLAINE. And what did you do? How did you cure yourelf ? SIR PETER. With a jorum of rum to be sure ! MARJOLAINE. Qh ! I can't do that ! SIR PETER. What? Are you broken-hearted? MARJOLAINE. I? Certainly not! Only, some- body somebody's broken their word. That's all. SIR PETER. Look at that, now! But I'll cure you! I'll tell vou a story. (Sits) Something POMANDER WALK. 55 funny ? How I lost my eye, what ? Ye see, it was on board the Termagant M ARJOLAINE. When you was with Nelson ? SIR PETER. Ay; at Copenhagen, year Eighteen- one. MARJOLAINE. I suppose yvu had many officers under you ? SIR PETER. Hundreds ! Well, when I say hun- dreds Ha! I was somebody then! but this in- fernal government MARJOLAINE. (Soothingly) Dear Sir Peter! and I suppose some of^ them were quite young officers ? SIR PETER. Middies? Lord love you, I took no notice of them! Passel o' powder-monkeys. Not but what Jack Sayle MARJOLAINE. (Indifferently) Jack what? SIR PETER. You know. Young feller I presented to your mother a week ago. Time she swooned. MARJOLAINE. O yes ! SIR PETER. Gobblessmysoul ! I was quite startled. MARJOLAINE. Was he on your ship? SIR PETER. Ay, was he ; and a fine young feller, too! Of course, you was much too agitated to notice him last Saturday. Gad ! I wonder he hasn't been to see me all this week. Promised he would. MARJOLAINE. (Eagerly) Did he? SIR PETER. He did. There, he's only on leave, and he has heavy social duties. Son of Lord Otf ord, y'know, MARJOLAINE. (Amazed) Lord Otf ord ? SIR PETER. (Rising) Ay, ay my old friend. Otf ord's selfish about him. Ye see, the boy'll come into a great estate ; and the old man's anxious about his marriage. MARJOLAINE. (Breathlessly) Whose? SIR PETER. Jack's, to be sure. Lord! They marry 'em now before they're out o' their swaddling 56 POMANDER WALK. clothes. Ot ford's in a hurry to secure the succes- sion (This not being a subject to discuss with a young girl, he pulls himself up) H'm Honourable Caroline Thring. MARJOLAINE. (Repeats) Caroline Thring. (Under her breath) SIR PETER. Daughter and sole heiress of Lord Wendover. Theie's a match. Goes about doing good like the party iast Saturday but the two estates'll cover the county. MARJOLAINE. (Who can't stand much more of it rises and goes L.) I chink I ;hink I saw Sempronius stirring. SIR PETER. (Going up a few steps) Damn that cat! (Exit EYESORE) Beg pardon! I'll! No, he's quiet. (Comes b^ck) Gobblessmysoul ! I've been boring you r>bout a jOung feller you don't know. (MAI^OLAINE turns her face from him. Taking her Z the sh~ Iders and turning her. With surprise) DC yvu? (.Vith suspicion) Do you? Here, I say, young woman ! Look rii in the eye this eye. MARJOLAINE. I I I have seen him once. SIR PETER. Have you, begad! So that's what ^e was up to, eh? (Indignantly) But I'll teach him! MARJOLAINE. Sir Peter ! If you breathe it, I'll never speak to you again I SIR PETER. D'ye chink I'll have him coming here ! MARJOLAINE. But he's not ! Don't you see he's not ? Swear you won't oreathe it to a soul ! Swear ! Swear i SIR PETER. Damme I must tnink that over! And as for you, I'll talk to you like a Dutch uncle (MRS. POSKETT opens her window.) MARJOLAINE. Sir Peter! Sempronius is going. to jump! POMANDER WALK. 57 SIR PETER. (Hurrying up) What! (MRS. POSKETT thrusts her head OK& of her. window.) MRS. POSKETT. Good morning, Sir Peter. (MARJOLAINE sits R. c.) SIR PETER. (Gruffly) 'Morning, ma'am. Your cat MRS. POSKETT. Sh! Dear Sempronius! Don't disturb him ! He's so happy ! SIR PETER. But ! MRS. POSKETT. I'm sure it's going to rain. (Enter MADAME from No. 5) He always sits there ^when he feels rain coming ; because the fish rise, and he loves watching them. SIR PETER. Confounded nonsense ! (He is com- ing back to the elm, but sees MADAME come out of No. 5 and cross to MARJOLAINE) O, hang! (He \goes into No. i) . (Meanwhile MARJOLAINE, seated under the tree, has bent her head lower and lower over her book. MADAME nods pleasantly to SIR PETER and MRS. POSKETT, SIR PETER and MRS. POSKETT disappear.) MADAME. (Crosses towards river, turns, and 'sees MARJOLAINE, comes quietly up to her, very gently) Marjolaine! (Gets L. of her) MARJOLAINE. (With a sudden gasping sob, hides her face in her mother's dress) O Maman! MADAME. (Sitting beside her L., and folding her in her arms) Cheriemy darling! What is the matter ? MARJOLAINE. (Rises, struggling with her emo- tion) Nothing, Mother. I shall be better directly. 58 POMANDER WALK. MADAME. Cry, Marjolaine Do you think I have not been watching you all this week? (Sits c.) Cry, my darling, and tell me. (MARJOLAINE sits R. c.) MARJOLAINE. There is nothing to tell, Mother. I was waiting to tell you a great secret ! But the secret no longer exists. (Buries her face again) MADAME. Ah, chtrie, you see? The secret exists ; it is breaking your heart. It will hurt you and hurt you. Till you tell me. MARJOLAINE. (Hushed) I can't, Mother. MADAME. Shall I help you, Marjolaine? MARJOLAINE. I cannot begin alone : I don't know how. MADAME. (Very gently) Let us say : you were Sitting here ; and that stranger that young man MARJOLAINE. (Rising and moving a little R. suddenly let loose) He stood over there in the sun ; and he looked at me; and I looked at him and (awed) Mother! What happened to me? I felt as if he and I had always known each other, and as if we were alone in the world. No ; as if he were alone in the world, and I were a part of him. And we spoke. Nothings ; things that did not matter ; silly things; about his being thirsty, and what I could give him. But it was only our voices speaking. I know it was only my voice. It was not I. I was thinking of sunshine and music and flowers. (Point- ing to the arbour) And we went in there, and the foolish talk went on ; and all the time my heart was singing! He told me his name, and my heart took it and wove music all around it and sang it, and sang it! And (Hushed) Mother! I seemed to step out of childhood suddenly, into into what, Mother ? What was it ? MADAME. Alas ! MARJOLAINE. When he went, I felt as if he had POMANDER WALK. 59 taken rhe with him ; my heart and my mind. He said he was coming again; but he never came, and every day I have wandered about, looking for what he had taken: looking for my life. He will never come again ! He will never bring back what he has carried away! O Mother! What is it? (Kneels by her mother R., and quietly cries) MADAME. My darling! Is it so serious as that? God help us, poor, blind things! While my child was going through the fire, I was matching silks for my embroidery ! MARJOLAINE. But it would have been the same if you had been here! MADAME. I suppose so. There is no barrier against it! (Puts her arms round MARJOLAINE) Not even a mother's arms. MARJOLAINE. What is it then, Mother? MADAME. (After thinking i moment) No, I will not tell you. If i told you, it would grow stronger ; and it must not. It shall not. You must win yourself back as I did. Oh, but sooner, and more completely. MARJOLAINE. (Astonished) As you did ? MADAME. My dearest dear, the young never realise they are not beginning the world. Your story is mine. MARJOLAINE. O Mother! MADAME. Yes : but mine was longer. We lived in our dream a whole year, so my love (MAR- JOLAINE starts at the word) had time to grow. Its roots were twined round my heart; and when ha left me, and tore the roots out of me, I thought he had torn my heart out with them ! (Rises and goes L.) MARJOLAINE. Like me ! MADAME. (Looking earnestly at MARJOLAINE) Would you like to know his name? MARJOLAINE. (Hushed; very tenderly) Yes what was it? (Rises) 60 POMANDER WALK. MADAME. Jack Sayle. (Slight pause.) MARJOLAINE. (Recoiling in amazement) Mother ! I don't understand ! MADAME. The father of the boy you have seen ! MARJOLAINE. How wonderful! MADAME. Much more wonderful things happen every day. It is much more wonderful that I can tell you this now : that I ever grew out of my love. For I loved him ! Ah, how deeply ! MARJOLAINE. (Putting her hand on her own heart) Mother, dear MADAME. What, my dearie ? MARJOLAINE. Is this is what I feel lovef MADAME. (Sadly crosses a little to R.) Ah! I have betrayed myself! I am afraid it was going to be love. MARJOLAINE. Going to be ! But it is! or else this ache? What is it? MADAME. (Earnestly, sits R. of MARJOLAINE) Crush it now! Fiercely! Ruthlessly! And it will be nothing. You have only r ,een him once MARJOLAINE, Does that make any difference? MADAME. (Avoiding a direct answer) You must be very brave: very determined; and put the thought of him away. MARJOLAINE. (Looking straight at her mother) Mother (Slight pause) did you love my father as much as you had loved Jack? MADAME. (Avoiding MARJOLAINE'S eyes) Yes. Differently. He was a brave, true man. I was very proud of your father; very happy and contented. And I am very happy and contented now ; or I shall be, when I see you have won the victory. MARJOLAINE. (Full of her own thoughts) And what became of Jack? MADAME. (Rises and moves a little to R. with a. POMANDER WALK. 61 slight tinge of bitterness) Oh! he married some great lady. MARJOLAINE. (With a catch of her breath, to herself) The Hon. Caroline Thring! MADAME. And then I went to France, and (Obviously not speaking the truth) I forgot him. MARJOLAINE. (Looking keenly at her mother) But Mother if you had forgotten him, why did you swoon when you heard his name? MADAME. (With a sad smile) Ah! My little girl is become a woman! (Lifts MARJOLAINE'S face and looks into it) The innocence of the dove, and the guile of the serpent! Come now, cherie, you promise to fight? (People begin to appear at the doors and windows of their houses.) MARJOLAINE. Yes. MADAME. You promise to conquer? MARJOLAINE. (Rising) I promise to try. MADAME. You see there can be nothing between Lord Otford's son and my daughter? MARJOLAINE. (Very doubtfully) Yes. (RUTH enters.) MADAME. Try to lighten someone else's sorrow ; then you will forget your own, and the roses will bloom in your cheeks again. (RuTH comes briskly out of No. 4 with her needle- work. She is evidently in a bad temper. She puts up her hand to see whether it is raining.) MADAME. Ah ! Coming into the fresh air, Miss Ruth ? RUTH. Of course it's going to rain! (Sits under tree L.) MADAME. Oh not yet! 62 POMANDER WALK. RUTH. Do you mind if I sew here? It's so lonesome when Barbara's locked up with her precious bird. MADAME. That is so touching. (RUTH snorts.) RUTH. (Calling) Marjory! (MADAME kisses MARJOLAINE and goes up R. and round into No. 5-) RUTH. (Calling again) Marjory! (Then searchingly) You haven't had a singing lesson this week. MARJOLAINE. (R., confused) I haven't been quite myself. RUTH. So I saw. Anything the matter? MARJOLAINE. (Hastily) Oh, nothing. Noth- ing to speak of. RUTH. H'm. Barbara was quite upset. MARJOLAINE. How sweet of her ! RUTH. Oh! Not so much about you. But she looks forward to sitting with you and Mr. Pringle when you are singing. MARJOLAINE. Is she so fond of music? RUTH. ' Bless your dear heart, no ! How could she sit .with you if she were? Doesn't know one tune from another! No; it isn't that. MARJOLAINE. What is it, then? RUTH. (Blowing whatever it is, away) Pfft ! (Suddenly) O ! grant me patience ! MARJOLAINE. (Amazed) Ruth! RUTH. Well! It seems to me the whole house is bewitched that ever I should say such a thing! MARJOLAINE. (Shocked) Oh! I thought you were so happy ! RUTH. I'm happy enough. Because I'm not a POMANDER WALK. 63 fool. But what with that feller upstairs, and Barbara down, a body has no peace of her life. MARJOLAINE. (Interested) Tell me! RUTH. Ha 'n't you noticed anything? No. I s'pose y^r're too young. Don't know what sheeps- eyes a e, when you see 'em. MARJOLAINE. Sheepseyes ? RUTF 'TL^'t for me to say anything; but with him .mining abo the h se ->igh*rg like like I don't know wha f ; and her mopLig like a hen with the pip, it's enough, r.s my dear mother used to say, to give a body the fantoddles. MARJOLAINE. (Who has been gazing towards gazebo, and remembering, eagerly) Are they are they fond of each other? RUTH. 7 c'jn't know! Yes, of course they ire! MARJOLAINE. (Simply) Then why don't they say so? RUTH. That's what I want to know ? MARJOLAINE. You should speak to Mr. Basil. RUTH. Me! Bless your dear neart, ne'd up and run away. He's <*ot it into nis silly aead le ain't good enough. He's as sny as i aon'* xnow what. MARJOLAINE. Perhaps if Barbara showed him she likes him ? Why don't you speak ;o her? Kindly, sympathetically. RUTH. So I did, just now. Told ner she was an idiot. She burst out crying, and went and shut herself up with that bird. MARJOLAINE. Ah! the old love! (Looking toward gazebo) RUTH. Old frying-pan! Oh, that bird! Marjory, there are times when I'd ^ive anybody a four-pr y D to wring that bird's n^ck! MARJOLAINE. (With a sudden idea. Excitedly) Ruth! RUTH. Well, I don't care. I mean it. If it wasn't for that bird 04 POMANDER WALK. MARJOLAINE. I wasn't thinking of the bird! Yes! I was thinking of the bird, but I wasnt !* hiking what / u thought I was thinking! Oh what nonsense you mJce me talki (Crossing to (RUTH rises and moves R.) RUTH. Whatever's got into the child's head! (SiR PETER c:mes out j/ No. i. Looks at his sweet peas, and expresses fury.) MARJOLAINE. (Trying to pull RUTH towards No 4) Jome ! Quick ! Come, and tell Barbara I want ner I RUTH. What do you want her for? MARJOLAINE. I mustn't tell you yet. She may refuse. (Enter EYESORE, who resumes his fishing.) RUTH. Bless and save us! Now your cheeks are glowing again ! MA JOLAINE. Maman said they would! Come along! RUTH. W~.it wait! My mouth's full of pins! (As thtj go up f SIR PETER meets them.) SIR PETER. Going in, just as I'm coming out? MARJOL\INE. (Laughing) Like ;"-e little peo- ple in the cottage: yon c~^e out *c~ rain; and I go in for sunshine, df.es to d^or) RUTH. II - - w & s _~t peas nming on? SIR PETER. (S leu:) Kow the doose can they come on, when that everlasting cat roots ''em up every night? POMANDER WALK. 65 (RuxH and MARJOLAINE go into No. 4.) SIR PETER. (Shaking his fist at the bush) Ohhh! (LORD OXFORD turns the corner.) OTFORD. Shaking your fist at me, Peter? SIR PETER. Otford? OTFORD. (Coming down and shaking hands) How are you ? Have you a moment to spare ? SIR PETER. All day, thanks to this confounded government. (At the elm) What is it? OTFORD. I'm in great trouble. SIR PETER. Damme! You're in trouble once a week ! Come into the gazebo. ( Cross R. ) OTFORD. The Gazebo? (Angrily) Ha! very appropriate. (They sit in the summer-house.) SIR PETER. Eh? Why? (He sits R.) OTFORD. (Producing a letter) Read this. SIR PETER. Can't. Haven't my spy-glass on me. OTFORD. Well, listen. (Reads) " My lord It is my painful duty to inform your lordship that your son, the Honourable John Sayle, is carrying on a clandestine love-affair with Mademoiselle Mar- jolaine Lachesnais of Pomander Walk " SIR PETER. Belay, there ! OTFORD. Wait a bit (Goes on reading) "Yes- terday they were together for nearly an hour in the gazebo " SIR PETER. (Angrily) When did you get that, and who wrote it? OTFORD. It's signed " Your true friend and well- wisher " and I had it on Sunday. SIR PETER. Do you mean to say that damned, 66 POMANDER WALK. anonymous, Sabbath-breaking rag came from mander Walk ? OTFORD. I presume so. SIR PETER. (Rises and crosses to L.) Who sent it? Show me the white-livered scoundrel, and by Jehoshaphat, I'll wring his neck! Is it a man's writing, or a woman's? OXFORD. It's vague. Might be anybody's. SIR PETER. Can't be Sternroyd Brooke-Hoskyn Pringle We're none of us anonymous slanderers. (Suddenly in a hoarse whisper) Was it the Eye- sore ? OTFORD. The Eyesore ? SIR PETER. That scarescrow, fishing. But what of it, Jack? You're not worried by that rubbish? Why it's a pack of lies! (Aside) Lord forgive me! (OTFORD tries to speak) Don't interrupt! I'm here all the time. Nothing happens in Po- mander Walk that I don't know. (OTFORD moves) Don't interrupt! I was here when Jack came last Saturday. He went back in his boat before you Could say " Jack Robinson," because Madame swooned. (Aside) Lord forgive me ! OTFORD. (Hotly) Now perhaps you'll let me say it's all true ! SIR PETER. (Raising his voice) Do you take this blackguard's word rather than mine ? OTFORD. You confounded old porcupine, Jack's owned up to the whole thing ! SIR PETER. (Shouting) What! Don't shout like that! d'ye want the whole Walk to hear? Sit down. Tell me again, quietly. (They sit in the ganebo. OTFORD L. SIR PETER R.) OTFORD. I taxed him with it, and he owned up. He came here last Saturday : met the damned little French gel SIR PETER. (Flaring up) Jack! POMANDER WALK. 67 OXFORD. I'll withdraw damned. Sat an hour in this infernal what-d'ye-call-it, and thinks he's in love with her. (SiR PETER tries to speak) Don't in- terrupt! You know the Sayles when their blood's up. You can imagine the scene we had. He's as pig-headed and obstinate as SIR PETER. As his father ! OTFORD. Don't interrupt! He's thrown Caro- line Thring over won't hear of her. The utmost I could get out of him was that he'd wait a week to make sure of what he calls his mind. Mind! Puppy! All the week he's gone about like a bear with a sore head. Had the impudence to refuse to speak to me. This morning he had the impudence to speak. And what d'ye think he said? SIR PETER. Serves ye right, whatever it was. OTFORD. He said, " The week's up, and I'm going to Pomander Walk." SIR PETER. (Delighted) He did? Ah, ha! Good lad! OTFORD. What? you're mad. (Rises and moves L.) Think of what's at stake! Ninety- thousand acres! For the daughter of a French- woman from God knows where! Who was the girl's father? Or, rather, who wasn't? SIR PETER. (Rising furious) Jack ! OTFORD. I withdraw! But think of it! An Otford, taking his wife from (Indicating the Walk in general) these these Almhouses ! SIR PETER. (Livid and speechless) Almhouses ! Pomander Walk ! Almhouses ! OTFORD. There, there! I withdraw Alms- houses. SIR PETER. Withdraw more, sir ! How dare you come here, abusing the sweetest, brightest, most winsome OTFORD. I believe you're in love with her your- self. SIR PETER. And. damme, why not? (Crosses 68 POMANDER WALK. to L.) Take care how you talk about innocent ladies you've never set eyes on! OXFORD. That's it. That's why I'm here. You are to present me to this Madame whatever her confounded name is. SIR PETER. In your present temper? I'll walk the plank first. (Pointing) There's her house white paint Go and pay your respects. Your res- pects, Jack ! Damme, you'll find you have to. OXFORD. I can't go to the house alone, and you know it. SIR PEXER. Then stay away. (Goes up) OXFORD. I'll stay here. (Sits in gazebo) And if Jack shows his nose ! SIR PEXER. (Putting his head round the side of gazebo) I shall be watching sir, and if you dare create a disturbance in Pomander Walk, I'll damme ! I'll set the Eyesore at you ! (He stumps off in a rage towards his house) OXFORD. Ha! (Sits down and folds his arms in silent fury) (Just as SIR PEXER is near his door, JACK enters R. u. E. At the same moment MADAME comes out of No. 5. She faces towards the elm, and calls.) MADAME. Marjolaine ! Marjolaine ! OXFORD. (In the summer-house) Aha! The mother ! (He sits up, attentive) SIR PEXER. (Seeing JACK ; in a hoarse whisper) Gobblessmysoul ! Jack! (Seises him) Getaway! MADAME. (Facing her house, calls) Nanette! JACK. (To SIR PEXER) Why? NANEXXE. (Throwing open the upstair window of No. 5) Quoi, Madame? SIR PEXER. (To JACK, pointing frantically to the summer-house) Your father! There! POMANDER WALK. 69 MADAME. (To NANETTE) Oe est-donc Made- moiselle? NANETTE. Je ne sais pas, Madame. (MADAME looks into her ground-floor window.) JACK. (To SIR PETER) I don't care: I won't go. SIR PETER. (Pointing to his own house) Come inside, then. JACK. No, better idea! (Whispers to SIR PETER, indicating the EYESORE) MADAME. (To NANETTE) Vite, alles voir si son chapeau est dans sa chambre. (NANETTE disappears. MADAME stands waiting, looking up at the house.) SIR PETER. ( With horror; to JACK) I wash my hands of it! (He dashes into his house. JACK goes to the EYE- SORE and speaks to him. The EYESORE drops his tackle with alacrity, and both vanish round the corner.) NANETTE. (Reappearing above, with a hat) Oui, Madame, voila le chapeau de Mademoiselle. Mademoiselle doit etre au pavilion. MADAME. Non; je viens de I'apeller. (With sudden suspicion) Serait-il possible ? (She comes down quickly to the summer-house. NANETTE closes the window and disappears.) MADAME. (Discovers LORD OTFORD. Starts slightly; but is quite self-possessed) Oh! OTFORD. (Condescendingly) I am the tres- 70 POMANDER WALK. passer. (Rises. MADAME moves to go) May I detain you one moment? MADAME. ( Very stiffly) I am at a loss OXFORD. I heard you calling your daughter. I presume you are Madame (He consults the let- ter) a h Lachesnais. (MADAME slightly inclines her head, but makes no reply) I am Lord Otford (He expects this to have an effect, but MADAME only brushes it aside with a movement of her hand, as a matter of no importance. This nonplusses him slightly. Pointing to the seat under the elm) Ah pray be seated. MADAME. (Declining to sit) What you have to say can be of so little importance OXFORD. (Flushing) I beg your pardon ! What I have to say is of the utmost consequence ! MADAME. I shall be surprised. And I am wait- ing. OXFORD. You make it somewhat difficult, ma'am. MADAME. Then why give yourself the trouble? (Moves) OXFORD. (Hastily) Pray wait! The fact is my foolish son MADAME. (Holding up her hand) Ah! I can spare you any further discomfort. Your son forced his acquaintance on my child in my absence a week ago. Be assured we, are willing to overlook his lack of manners. The circumstance need not be further alluded to. OXFORD. But it must! I must explain! MADAME. No explanation or apology is re- quired, since under no circumstances shall we allow the acquaintance to continue. OXFORD. But my son has pledged his word to come again, and MADAME. Make yourself easy on that score. He hr s broken ! is word. OXFC...O. That was my doing ! I persuaded him POMANDER WALK. 71 to wait a week. I regret to say he means to come to-day. MADAME. Well, Pomander Walk is public, and we cannot prevent him. OXFORD. But he'll see you daughter ! MADAME. I think not. Unless he breaks into the house. OTFORD. Upon my soul, I believe he'll go that length ! That is where I ask for your cooperation. MADAME. Pardon me. Not cooperation. (Haughtily) But I shall defend my own. OTFORD. (Amazed) Defend? What do you mean? MADAME. (With dignity) I mean, that no member of your family is likely to cross my thresh- old. OTFORD. (Still more amazed) You speak as though you nursed a grudge against my family! MADAME. (With a tinge of scorn) Oh, no grudge whatever! But I remember OTFORD. Remember what ? MADAME. (Facing him) Am I so changed Jack Sayle ? OTFORD. Indeed, ma'am (Starting) Good God! MADAME. Are you still puzzled? OTFORD. Lucy ! MADAME. Lucy Pryor. (She bows and moves L. as if to go in) OTFORD. (Deeply moved) No! No! Stop! This alters the case entirely! MADAME. (With raised eyebrows) How? OTFORD. (At a loss) I I don't know I am stunned! After all these years! MADAME. (Lightly) Why, what does it amount to? After all these years, Lord Otford meets Madame Lachesnais. These are not the Jack Sayle and Lucy Pryor who loved years ago. He does not meet a broken-hearted' woman, pining for her lost 72 POMANDER WALK. girlhood, but one who has been a happy wife, and a happy Another and a mother who will defend her daughter's happiness. (With sligh mockery) So there is no cause for such a tragic countenance, my lord! OTFORD. (Nonplussed, angry with himself) Madam * I am well rebuked. I wish you a very good day ! ( With a profound bow he goes up. JACK returns in the EYESORE'S coat and hat with the collar up, and the hat crushed down. LORD OXFORD nearly runs up against him. To JACK re- lieving his feelings) Damn you, sir! (Exit) (The EYESORE (JACK) calmly picks up his rod. He finds a fish on the hook. MADAME leans a moment against one of the pillars of the sum- mer-house. MRS. POSKETT opens her upper window. SIR PETER appears at his. MAR- JOLAINE and BARBARA come out of No. 4 ) MRS. POSKETT. (Calling) Sempronius! Puss! Puss! Puss! (THE EYESORE unhooks the fish, and throws it on the grass beside him. MADAME crosses slowly in front of tree to L.) SIR PETER. It's no use calling him, ma'am ; he's got his eye on the fish. MRS. POSKETT. (Indicating the EYESORE) You don't say the Eyesore's caught one ! SIR PETER. (Chuckling) Ay, ay! He's won- derfully patient and persistent, ma'am! MRS. POSKETT. Astonishing what patience and persistence'll do, Admiral. (Closes her window) SIR PETER. What's she mean? (He leans out and whistles towards the EYESORE, but sees * Not - Madame." POMANDER WALK. 73 MADAME coming) Gobbiessmysoul ! Here's Madame! (Closes window and disappears hur- riedly) (Meanwhile MARJOLAINE and BARBARA have come out of No 4.) MADAME. I was a little alarmed about you, Mar- jolaine. Did you not hear me call? MARJOLAINE. No, Maman cherie. MADAME. (To BARBARA) Don't let her stay out if it rains. (She goes into No. 5) BARBARA. The Eyesore looks more revolting than ever. (Goes R. of tree) (At this moment the EYESORE catches another fish, which he lays with the first.) MARJOLAINE. (With a little shudder) Dread- ful ! Oh ! he's caught a fish ! BARBARA. Wonderful! (Whispered) What is he doing, now ? MARJOLAINE. Don't look! (In a tragic whis- per) He's putting on a worm! (They come down) It was impossible to talk in Ruth's pres- ence, with Doctor Johnson screaming in the next room. (JiM, JANE and NANETTE are seen through the upper windows moving about the rooms. MADAME is seen at lower window. BARBARA and MARJOLAINE walk to a. and back to R. c. with their arms round each other's waists.) BARBARA. (Rapidly) Dearest, shall I confess that sometimes that bird But no! It were dis- loyal ! Only, if Charles had given me a lock of his hair, perhaps it would not have made so much 74 POMANDER WALK. noise. Yet that is a selfish wish, for he had been scalped. MARJOLAINE. How dreadful! Barbara, were you very much in love? BARBARA. Dearest, is that quite a delicate ques- tion? MARJOLAINE. Well I mean, are you still a* much in love as ever ? BARBARA. Dearest! do you think love can change ? And do I not hear the sound of my darl- ing's voice every time Doctor Johnson yells? Oh! if only that innocent fowl had been present when Charles used different language! MARJOLAINE. (Innocently) But did he? BARBARA. (Pensively) I sometimes wonder. MARJOLAINE. Perhaps the loss of his hair BARBARA. Yes, but he concealed the honourable scar under a lovely wig. And (Looking at the house) O, dearest! Can any physical infirmity affect true love? MARJOLAINE. (Watching her closely) I sup- pose not. BARBARA. (Enthusiastically) I am quite sure it cannot. MARJOLAINE. (Taking both her hands. Search- ingly) Barbara why are you quite sure? BARBARA. (Confused) Dearest! How search- ing you are ! MARJOLAINE. (More pressing) Tell me ! Why are you quite sure? BARBARA. (Evading the question) Did your mother match those lovely silks? MARJOLAINE. (Meaningly) Mr. Basil plays the violen beautifully. BARBARA. (In a flutter) Oh, dearest ! Oh, you wicked dearest! You have guessed my secret. (Kisses MARJOLAINE) MARJOLAINE. I was sure before I guessed ! BARBARA. Promise you will never tell a living POMANDER WALK. 75 soul ! Look ! The Eyesore has caught another fish ! Poor darling ! MARJOLAINE. (Severely) You are not in love with the Eyesore as well ? BARBARA. I mean the fish ! To be drawn out of the watery element ! MARJOLAINE. That comes of liking worms. BARBARA. (Very sentimentally) That's what I shall do. (Sits R. c.) I shall let the worm i' the bud feed on my damaged cheek (MARJOLAINE sits L. c. JACK EYESORE moves down a little.) MARJOLAINE. Barbara, suppose Mr. Basil's cheek is being fed on, too ! BARBARA. Dearest, that is impossible. MARJOLAINE. Suppose I know it is? BARBARA. You wonderful child! (Sharply) Then why doesn't he say so? MARJOLAINE. Suppose he's too shy? BARBARA. Oh, aren't men silly? (Tragically) Then we must look and long. MARJOLAINE. But suppose a third person spoke ! (JACK EYESORE moves down a little further.) BARBARA. You ! MARJOLAINE. No. (Sees the EYESORE still ap- proaching) Hush! the Eyesore (Rises and rings BARBARA down L.) BARBARA. You don't mean he's to be Cupid's messenger ! MARJOLAINE. (Laughing) No, no! Listen! and try not to scream! Doctor Johnson talks, doesn't he? BARBARA. (Bewildered) Doctor John ? MARJOLAINE. And he learns easily ? BARBARA. Learns what ? 76 POMANDER WALK. MARJOLAINE. Let Basil hear it from him. BARBARA. Hear what? MARJOLAINE. (Laughing) Oh, you little goose! Teach the parrot to say " Barbara loves you ! " BARBARA. (With a scream) Marjory! MARJOLAINE. (Silencing her) Sh! BARBARA. (Suddenly grave) Charles's only gift turned to such uses ! (Shocked) O Marjory ! (Moves away R.) MARJOLAINE. Wouldn't Charles be pleased to know his gift had been the means of making you happy ? BARBARA. From what I can remember of him, I should say, decidedly not! (JACK EYESORE moves still further down.) MARJOLAINE. (Alluding to the EYESORE) The Eyesore's quite close ! BARBARA. Oh! (Very excited) I can't bother about him. Oh, it's such' a splendid idea ! Oh, my goodness, what shall I do ! (Runs L.) MARJOLAINE. (Alluding to the EYESORE) 111 flpeak to him ! I'll save him from Sir Peter's wrath ! BARBARA. No ! No ! MARJOLAINE. Stand by me! Hold my hand! (BARBARA runs to MARJOLAINE again and then back to house.) BARBARA. I daren't I'm frightened! And I want to begin teaching the bird! (She runs into No. 4) MARJOLAINE. Treacherous Barbara! (She summons up all her courage, and approaches the EYESORE. At last she speaks, very timidly) S. Sir ! (The EYESORE throws his wrap-rascal and hat into the gazebo, and stands revealed as JACK. With an involuntary cry of joy) Jack I POMANDER WALK. 77 JACK. Quick! Into the arbour! MARJOLAINE. (Remembering her indignation) I will not! JACK. (Seising her, and dragging her off) Yes, you will ! (He has dragged her into the summer- house. Sits left of her and at once says) Marjory, I love you ! MARJOLAINE. (Sinking on his breast, over- whelmed) Oh! Oh! JACK. (Folding her close to him, and speaking passionately) I love you, love you, little Marjory. I loved you the first moment I saw you under the elm. MARJOLAINE. (Breaking away from him) How dare you 1 Oh, how dare you ! I didn't know what I was doing! You swept me off my feet! Go away! You broke your word! You never came! JACK. I come now! MARJOLAINE. In a horrible disguise! And too late! (Sobbing) I have promised not to love you! JACK. Whom have you promised ? MARJOLAINE. My dear, dear Mother ! JACK. Don't you love me? MARJOLAINE. If I did, I've promised not to. JACK. What's the use of that, if you do? MARJOLAINE. / keep my word. JACK. So do I. MARJOLAINE. Oh ! JACK. Differently. I told my father; and I promised I'd stay away a week and make sure. I've made sure, and I've come. Isn't that keeping my word? MARJOLAINE. (Hesitating) It seems so, when you tell it but JACK. Do they want you to marry somebody else? MARJOLAINE. No. 78 POMANDER WALK. JACK. They want me to. (With conscious virtue) But I refused. MARJOLAINE. That's it! You're a great man; by-and-by you'll live in marble halls ; and you never said a word about it ! JACK. Hang it all ! I told you my name ! I can't go about shouting I'm a lord's son ! MARJOLAINE. And you're going to marry a great lady! (Sobbing) The Hon honourable Caroline Thring ! Oh, doesn't it sound horrid ! JACK. (Violently) I'm not going to marry her! And she doesn't want to marry me; and there's only one girl in the world for me, and that's you you you. (Shower of rain threatened. Lights begin to go down very gradually.) MARJOLAINE. (Holding him off, and speaking very earnestly) Jack I*m the one girl in the world you can never marry. JACK. (Awed) You speak as if you meant it! MARJOLAINE. (Rising) I do. We are fated to part. JACK. Why on earth ? MARJOLAINE. It is a terrible secret. (Sits) Sit close. Oh, closer! Listen. (Melodramatically) Your father loved my mother, when they were both very young JACK. No ! MARJOLAINE. 'M. And he went on loving her for years and years and years ; and then he left her, just as you left me last Saturday; and went and married the Honourable Caroline Thring ! JACK. (Bewildered) What? MARJOLAINE. Oh, well same thing some other great lady. JACK. (Gives a low whistle) Phew! POMANDER WALK. 79 MARJOLAINE. And Maman's never forgotten it. Just as I shouldn't. And that's why she fainted when she heard your name. JACK. (Whistles again) Phew! That accounts for my father's temper just now ! MARJOLAINE. (Puzzled) Just now ? JACK. When I landed he was here with your mother. MARJOLAINE. (Astonished and frightened) Oh! JACK. Sir Peter told me. It was a close shave. I had just time to borrow that fellow's coat. When my father came out he was perfectly furious. He swore at me horribly. MARJOLAINE. You see! Maman had just told him what she thinks about him, and we must part for ever. (Tragically) It's what they call a Blood- Feud. (Rises and crosses to L, of JACK) JACK. (Rising) Then we must marry, to wipe it out ! Marjory, we must fly \ MARJOLAINE. Fly ? JACK. Fly ! Run away I Elope I MARJOLAINE. Leave Maman I (Matter vj 1 fact) I couldn't do it ! JACK. You'd have to, if we were married. MARJOLAINE. Afterwards, perhaps but not be- fore. JACK. We'll be married at once. Then it'll be afterwards. MARJOLAINE. No, no, no. It's no use. (Appeal- ingly, but meaning the opposite) Don't ask me, will you? Besides, we can't be married at once. In your stupid England, the parson has to ask the congregation three times whether they have any objection ! As if it was their business ! JACK, Banns! Hang! (Thinks) 1 know! Licence ! MARJOLAINE. Don't ask me, You won't ask me, will you? (Eagerly) What is a licence? JACK You go to a Bishop, and he gives you a 8o POMANDER WALK. document, and then you go to the nearest Church- and there you are ! MARJOLAINE. I don't believe you're there at all. Oh, it's no use ! (Pause, then very tenderly) Do you know any Bishops? JACK. (Crestfallen) No. Don't you? 'MARJOLAINE. (Miserably) Not one. JACK. It's discouraging. (Both sit. DOCTOR STERNROYD comes out of his house, laden with books. He puts his hand out; finds it is raining; opens his umbrella; and with difficulty gets through the gate.) MARJOLAINE. (Hearing him) Sh! JACK. Why? MARJOLAINE. The Reverend Doctor Sternroyd coming out of hishouse. JACK. A parson? MARJOLAINE. Yes. JACK. (Jumping up) By George! MARJOLAINE. What are you going to do? (JACK comes to the edge of the summer-house, and calls.) JACK. Doctor Sternroyd! MARJOLAINE. (Alarmed) Oh ! STERNROYD. (Startled; lets all his books fall) Dear me! Tut, tut! (He gets hopelessly mixed up with his umbrella and his books) JACK. (Helping him) I beg your pardon, Doctor. (Edges him into the summer-house) Come in, it's going to rain. (JACK leads DR. STERNROYD to seat in gazebo: they put books on the ground in front of c. of seat) (Enter the EYESORE; looks for his coat and hat, POMANDER WALK Act II Page POMANDER WALK. 81 then expresses joy at the fish, and resumes fish- ing.} MRS. POSKETT. (Opening her window) Sem- pronius ! Sempronius ! Come in, you bad cat ! You'll get wet through ! (She disappears) (MARJOLAINE takes DR. STERNROYD'S umbrella and shuts it.) JACK. Sit down, Doctor; here, between us. STERNROYD. (Bewildered) But, my dear young friends ! (Takes umbrella from MARJOLAINE) JACK. You'd get wet and catch cold. (He takes umbrella) My name's Jack Sayle. (DR. STERNROYD takes umbrella from JACK.) MARJOLAINE. His name is the Honourable John Sayle, and he is the only son of Lord Otford. STERNROYD. (Promptly and glibly) Otford: Or, on a fess azure between in chief, a sinister arm embowed and couped at the shoulder fesswise vested of the second, holding in the hand proper a martel gules, and in base a cerf regardant passant vert, three martlets of the first. Crest : out of a crest coronet a blasted oak MARJOLAINE. Oh ! STERNROYD. Motto : Sayle and Return. JACK. ( Who has been impatiently trying to inter- rupt him) Doctor ! (The two lean across the utterly bewildered DOCTOR and talk volubly without giving him a chance of getting a word in. Their speeches overlap) When you've quite done, we want to get married, and you've got to get a licence (Shower over. Lights begin to go gradually up again.) 82 POMANDER WALK MARJOLAINE. Because we're in a dreadful hurry and Maman won't hear of it. (Down on one knee) JACK. And my father wants me to marry Caroline Thring which is wicked MARJOLAINE. And of course 1*11 never do it, and it's no use asking me, and JACK. We're going to be married anyhow, and if you don't help, we shall run away MARJOLAINE. And you wouldn't like to be the cause of our doing that, would you (She kneels) JACK. And we love each other (He kneels) MARJOLAINE. (Leaning forward) Very, very, dearly! (Their lips meet, across DR. STERNROYD'S knees to the horror of the almost stupe fid antiquary.) STERN RO YD. (Trying tD rise) I am deeply shocked! (Rising between them) Profoundly surprised! I shall ^ake r point of informing Madame Lachesnais and his lordship (MARJOLAINE and JACK rise.) JACK. Oh, I say ! You can't, you know, because we took you into our confidence ! STERNROYD. (As nearly angry as he can be) I did not ask for your confidence ! JACK. Well you've got it! MARJOLAINE. (Insinuatingly) And Doctor dear think of when you were young! STERNROYD. (Arrested) Eh? Dear me! How did you know? (Sits) If I did run away with my blessed Araminta JACK. Ah ! there you see ! STERNROYD. I had every excuse. She was deeply interested in prehistoric remains. POMANDER WALK. 83 MARJOLAINE. (To STERNROYD) And I'm sure you were very happy. STERNROYD. (Sadly) Ah, my child, she has been married the same day? STERNROYD. Ho, no! The day after, perhaps. MARJOLAINE. (Ticking the days off on her fingers) Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday oh, dear! JACK. But what am I to do till then ? I daren't go home. My father's quite capable of having me kidnapped and sent to my ship ! MARJOLAINE. (Distressed) O Jack! JACK. (With decision) Doctor you must put me up. (Rises) 84 POMANDER WALK. STERNROYD. Put you ? JACK. Up. Give me a bed. STERNROYD. And incur your noble father's dis- pleasure ? JACK. On the contrary. He'd be deeply grateful to you for showing me hospitality. (Lights full.) STERNROYD. But Mr. Brooke-Hoskyn ! JACK. He shan't see me and if he does, his mouth's shut. Shut! STERNROYD. You'll find me poor company, young gentleman. JACK. It's only for two days. And every even- ing (To MARJOLAINE) we'll meet under the elm. (DR. STERNROYD picks up one of the books) I'll whistle so (Does it) and you'll come out. STERNROYD. Ah, well! (Sits between them) Now you must give me full particulars. Your names; ages; professions, if any MARJOLAINE. How horrid! STERNROYD. (Opening one of his books, reads the title with great enjoyment) " Epicteti quae supersunt Dissertationes " . A pencil. Now, Mr. Sayle (The three put their heads together. The DOCTOR questions them and writes their answers on /** fly-leaf. The EYESORE in his corner has been showing symptoms of increasing anxiety and discomfort about Sempronius. He has " shoo'd " him and shaken his fist at him to no purpose. BROOKE-HOSKYN comes out of No. 3 in gorgeous array. As he comes down the steps, he is arrested, presumably by a voice from the room above. He stops, with an impatient exclamation, turns, and addresses the upstair window somewhat peevishly.) POMANDER WALK. 85 BROOKE. Eh? What ? Late ? Yes ; I told you I should be. But I have the key. What? Yes; I did ; I found the key-hole easily enough, but the key was twisted What? Sober ? (Indignant) Reely, Selina ! (Meanwhile RUTH PENNY- MINT comes out of No. 4. MRS. POSKETT is at her open window. SIR PETER comes to his door. BASIL opens his window, and plays the fiddle. MADAME comes into her garden. BARBARA is at the ground floor window of No 4. JIM comes out of No. i and trains the sweet peas. The EYESORE grows more and more violent towards the cat. Continuing without interruption) Dammit, ma'am, they'll hear you howling all down the Walk. RUTH. Off to the whirl of fashion so early? BROOKE. (Nervously edging away from the house) H'm it is a long way to the City My friends the Goldsmiths' Company a banquet to the Chinese Ambassador my shay is waiting round the corner. RUTH. I'll go and sit with your poor wife. BROOKE. How kind of you. But ah not just now. I left the dear soul asleep and dreaming of the angels. RUTH. Oh ! Look at the Eyesore ! BROOKE. Haha ! Sempronius is about to snatch his fish, and he cannot leave his line! Reely most amusing ! STERNROYD. (In the summer-house, closing his book) There! I think that's all. MARJOLAINE. (Peeping out to the right of the summer-house) Oh ! Oh ! (For at this moment, the EYESORE, losing patience, flings down his rod, leaps at the cat, seises it, and hurls it, yelling horribly, into the river. Then, picking up the fish and his tackle, he bolts.) 86 POMANDER WALK. MRS. POSKETT. Sempronius! Save him! RUTH. (To BROOKE) Save him! BROOKE. In these clothes! MADAME. (Calls) Marjolaine! MARJOLAINE. (Running out of the summer- house) Voila, Maman! (But in the nick of time SIR PETER, flinging off his coat, hurries down the water-steps.) BARBARA. Oh, Sir Peter ! Take care ! BASIL. He will be drowned ! r (SiR PETER emerges, holding the drenched and struggling cat by the scruff of his neck. He brings it with heroic dignity to MRS. POSKETT, who is leaning half fainting against her ro& ings.) SIR PETER. Your cat, ma'am I (MRS. POSKETT takes the cat, and, to the amazement , of the Walk, throws it over the railings of her garden; then, to the Walk's further stupefac- tion, she flings her arms round SIR PETER'S neck, and cries:) MRS. POSKETT. My hero ! My preserver ! (She to him) SIR PETER. Gobblessmysoul ! MADAME. Marjolaine ! RUTH. (Simultaneously) How beautiful! BROOKE. She's got himi BARBARA. Happy pair ! BASIL. (Plays "See, the Conquering Hero Comes") Belay there! POMANDER WALK. 8? (Enter CAROLINE THRING.) JIM. 'Ware pirate Here's the Dragon (All the women rush to the doors and windows of their houses and watch.) CAROLINE. What horrible people. (To SIR PETER) You dreadful old man! (Coming R. c.) SIR PETER. Eh! You, again! Don't speak to me! I'm dangerous! CAROLINE. You don't know whom you arc addressing ! SIR PETER. I don't ; and I don't want to ! CAROLINE. I am Caroline Thring! SIR PETER. Caroline! Gobblessmysoul ! (Col- lapses) JACK. (In the summer house) Caroline! Oh! my stars ! (Puts on the EYESORE'S coat and hat) MARJOLAINE. Caroline ! (Helps JACK) CAROLINE. (Walking round to L. c. looking at houses) Where Is the girl with the curls? SIP PETER. ". I I don't know ! CAROLINE. In the summer house, no doubt. JACK. She's coming. Doctor, lie lie till you're black in the face ! SIR PETER. (c. stopping CAROLINE) You mustn't go there ! You can't go there ! You shan't go there ! CAROLINE. Stand aside intoxicated person. SIR PETER. Intoxicated! Me!! (Goes up a little) CAROLINE. (Seeing DR. STERNROYD) A clergy- man! STERNROYD. Humble servant, m'am. CAROLINE. (Indicating JACK) But this ? MARJOLAINE. A poor man, your ladyship: I'm teaching him his letters, your ladyship : and this kind 88 POMANDER WALK. clergyman is going to give him soup, your ladyship. Come, good man, lean on me. CAROLINE. I'm glad mv first visit bore such good fruit. (To JACK) Give me your other arm. BASIL. (Who is wetfahmv ff>* upstairs window, shouts) But the Eyewor rnawayl Who's ? SIR PETER. Hold your tongue. (CAROLINE, MARJOLAINE and JACK cross to L. and JACK goes into house.) BASIL. (Shouting louder) Well, but, Dr. Stern- royd ! STERNROYD. Hold your silly tongue, sir. CAROLINE. (To MARJOLAINE) You're a good little girl here's a four-penny oit for you. MARJOLAINE. (Demurely) Thank you my lady. '(CAROLINE THRING is down L. she walks rapidly round past each house; as she does so each door is vigourously slammed as she passes it. Exit R, U. E.) CURTAIN. '{When the curtain is taken up all except MARJO- LAINE and SIR PETER who are at seat c., are at their doors and windows. JACK has taken off the EYESORE'S hat and thrown back the coat, and is at the lower window of STERNROYD'S house laughing. All burst into shouts of laughter.) POMANDER WALK. 89 ACT III. PROPERTIES FOR ACT III. Tea things on table and chair (both from No. 5) (between tree and No. 5) Stone by Gazebo for Eyesore Ladder and Torch (off stage) Pie and bread Parcels LIGHTING ACT III. Red and white foots and borders full up. R. 2 Rose spots (later on replaced by blue when moon rises) Arm at back of panorama R. pinks up blues not up yet. L. (Blue spot to come on later when moon rises) In top room of No. 5. Baby lense (amber) to come on when 2nd lamp post is lighted by lamp lighter. CUES. Page 107. And I shall call the book " Pearls be- fore Swine " (begin very gradually to take white out of borders) Page in. Now I want you to knock at that door (Begin to put blues into borders, and very gradually take off I rose~ spot off R. bridge) Lower whites off foots a little and put blues in gradually. 90 POMANDER WALK. Page 1 1 6. That will tell the Walk, (take 2nd rose spot off very slowly put blues intc arm behind panorama and let rose lights gradually die out). Page 118. Hoskyn by all that's wonderful. (All reds are out only white and blue in foots). Page 122. As lamplighter lights the 2nd lamp The baby lense is lighted top window of No. 5 focussed on Madame and Lord Otford by the tree. Page 129. Let me pass let me pass. Five years I've been a sailor. (The moon rises slowly over top of church and rippie gradually comes on the water. As moon appears the blue spots are slowly un- blinded R. and L. and flood the stagre). As lamplighter puts out 2nd lamp Baby lense in No. 5 is blinded. On no account must foots be raised or lighting of stage be altered for calls at end of play. (Author's directions.) POMANDER WALK. 91 ACT III. (Monday evening, June 3rd, 1805.) SCENE: All the inhabitants of Pomander Walk, excepting BARBARA PENNYMINT and the REV. JACOB STERNROYD, are assembled round the elm, where MADAME is L. c. presiding at the after- dinner tea-table. NANETTE goes to and fro with a large kettle of boiling water from which she replenishes the tea-pot. JIM tries to help her, but gets his fingers slapped for his pains. It is very near sunset, and a perfectly ideal June evening. The level sun, shining through the leaves of the elm, turns them to gold, and sets some of the windows of the Walk aflame. Yet there is an air of subdued gloom over most of our friends. MRS. POSKETT sits under the tree, and drinks her tea with the resignation of a martyr. BASIL, is lost in sentimental musings, and his eyes wander to No. 4 from which he hopes BARBARA will soon issue. RUTH is in a bad temper. MADAME is puzzled by MARJO- LAINE, who is the only person in genuinely high spirits. SIR PETER makes a heroic pretence to seem at his ease but casts anxious looks at MRS. POSKETT. BROOKE-HOSKYN eyes SIR PETER with a disappearing and glassy stare, but is affable to the rest of the party. From time to time JACK SAYLE is seen peering hungrily from behind the curtain of the down" stair window of No. 3 or moving about like a caged tiger. One great feature of the Walk is wissing: the EYESORE is not at his post. BROOKE. (R. Booming) Ah, ladies, thera is 92 POMANDER WALK. nothing like a dish of tea after dinner. It is so soothing ! MRS. POSKETT. (Tearfully) Nothing can soothe the broken heart. (On R. c. of seat under tree) (RUTH L. of seat. MARJOLAINE up R. with BASIL. SIR PETER down L. JIM R. of tea-table. MARJOLAINE takes cup from BASIL, and takes it to the tea-table.) SIR PETER. (Asserting himself; with forced cheerfulness) Hah! I've always said Pomander Walk was a Haven of Content. Look at it! (No one pays the slightest attention) I say, look at it! (BROOKE glares. MRS. POSKETT and RUTH turn their backs on him. BASIL sighs.) MARJOLAINE. (Running to SIR PETER, coming to the rescue) There's something the matter with the Walk to-night, Sir Peter; I'm the only merry one among you ! MADAME. (To MARJOLAINE, with quiet re- monstrance) Marjolaine ! (SiR PETER wanders up and round to R.) MARJOLAINE. Oh, let me laugh, Maman! (Whispers) They are so droll ! Sir Peter is afraid of Mrs. Poskett; Mrs. Poskett is almost in tears; Mr. Basil is gloomy ; Ruth is in a bad temper ; and Mr. Brooke-Hoskyn hasn't got over Saturday's banquet ! MADAME. (With grave reproof) But you, Marjolame MARJOLAINE. (Laughing) You told me to fight it, Maman! POMANDER WALK. 93 (MADAME shakes her head, and sits at the tea- table.) SIR PETER. (R. of BROOKE-HOSKYN. Heartily) Didn't see you in Church yesterday, Brooke. Too much turtle on Saturday what BROOKE. Nothing of the sort, sir! I was hold- ing my dear Selina's hand ! (H e turns on his heel) SIR PETER. Um. MRS. POSKETT. How is that dear, innocent lamb ? BROOKE. Gambolling, ma'am. Figuratively speaking, Selina is gamboling. MRS. POSKETT. How wonderful! BASIL. (Down L.) Miss Marjory, won't you cheer us with a song? MADAME. (Hastily) I am sure she would prefer not to sing to-night. MARJOLAINE. Oh, yes, Maman, with pleasure, if they would like it! MADAME. Brave chik SIR PETER. (R.) Sing that pretty little thing (Roars) " Oh, dear, what can the matter be." BROOKE. (With a snort) Ha! SIR PETER. (Turning on him furiously) Well, sir? BROOKE. (With arched eye-brows) What, sir? (Goes up) MADAME. (Amiably) Sir Peter Mrs. Poskett's cup is empty. ( BROOKE-HOSKYN goes into gazebo and sits.) SIR PETER. Is it ? O hang ! (To MRS. POSKETT, gruffly) Your cup, ma'am! MRS. POSKETT. (Looking up at him tenderly) How kind you are! (SiR PETER takes cup to tea-table.) 94 POMANDER WALK. BASIL. (To quiet them for MARJOLAINE'S song) Hush, hush ! (JiM listens to song from window of No. I.) MARJOLAINE. (Sings) Oh, dear, what can the matter be ? Dear, dear, what can the matter be? Oh, dear, what can the matter be? Johnnie's sc 1 ng at the fair! He promised he'd buy me a fairing would please me, And then for a kiss, oh, he said he would tease me; He promised to buy me a bunch of blue ribbon, To set off my bbnnie brown hair. BROOKE. (In his grandest manner, applauding with the tips of his fingers) Brava ! Brava ! (MRS. POSKETT beckons to MARJOLAINE who runs to R. of her.) SIR PETER. Brava be hanged! Capital! (To RUTH) Where's little Miss Barbara? RUTH. (Fiercely) Sh! SIR PETER. Well, I'm ! MARJOLAINE. (Sings) He promised to buy me a basket of posies, A garland of lilies, a garland of roses, A little straw hat to set off the blue ribbon To tie up my bonnie brown hair For it's (Chorus OMNES.) Oh, dear, what can the matter be, etc. POMANDER WALK. 95 (Half way through the 2nd verse SIR PETER joins in JIM at lower window also joins in chorus and is stopped by SIR PETER. General applause. "Thank you"! " Very sweet" ! etc. NANETTE comes up to MARJOLAINE.) NANETTE. Mon Dleu, que c'est joli! SIR PETER. (Roaring) " Oh, dear, what can the natterbe." MRS. POSKETT. (Breaking down) O don't! I can't bear it. RUTH. (To SIR PETER) Brute! BROOKE. Mong doo, mong doo ! Silence for the Admiral's song. SIR PETER. By Jehoshaphat! MADAME. Sir Peter (Indicating MRS. POSKETT) Take her another dish of tea. SIR PETER. Me, ma'am ! (But he takes it 'round in front) It's a confounded conspiracy! (To MRS. POSKETT) Your tea, ma'am. MRS. POSKETT. (Sobbing) How sweet of you! SIR PETER. Dash it and hang it, ma'am, you're crying into it! (SiR PETER and BROOKE-HOSKYN glare at each other. SIR PETER goes up) MARJOLAINE. (To RUTH) Where is Barbara? (Cross to RUTH and down R.) RUTH. (Rising, taking her apart) It's enough to make a saint swear ! She's been locked in with Doctor Johnson since Saturday. Only comes out for meals. ( BROOKE-HOSKYN goes to R. of MADAME at tea- table.) SIR PETER. (To BASIL) Pr ingle, can you tell me what's come over the Walk? (JiM comes out of No. i.) 96 POMANDER WALK. BASIL. (Cold and stiff) The Walk has lofty ideals, sir; perhaps you have fallen short of them! (He turns away) SIR PETER. (Speechless) By Jehoshaphat! (Up L.) BROOKE. (Booming) Yes, ma'am; Sherry was in fine condition on Saturday. SIR PETER. (Trying again) And port, too, eh, Brookie, my boy? BROOKE. (Sternly) My name is Brooke- Hoskyn, sir, and I was referring to my Right Honourable friend, Richard Brinsley Sheridan! SIR PETER. (Grumbles) Why couldn't you say so! BROOKE. (To the assembly) As I was about to say, (With glare at SIR PETER) when I was inter- rupted What wit ! What brilliance ! RUTH. Oh, do tell us ! BROOKE. In order to appreciate the point, you must remember the weather was sultry on Satur- day SIR PETER. Gave you a headache, what? BROOKE. (Glares, but proceeds) " Brooke," says he, " Brooke, my boy " (Pats MRS. POSKETT heavily on the shoulder, she breaks down, and sobs) just like that " it's a very warm night ! " (He looks round for applause, and ultimately gets it) SIR PETER. H'm. Don't see much in that. BROOKE. Nobody ever suspected you of a sense of humour, sir! (To the others) Ah and my friend, H. R. H. the P. of W. ALL. (Except SIR PETER, with awe) Oh h! SIR PETER. Who? BROOKE. (Crushingly) His Royal Highness, the Prince of Wales, sir ! MRS. POSKETT. (Eagerly) What did he say? BROOKE. It was not so much what he said, as his manner of saying it. Just : " Ah, Brooke, lend me POMANDER WALK. 97 a guinea ! " but oh, the elegance ! Oh, the con- descension ! SIR PETER. Well! of all the ! MADAME. Do you ever make speeches, Mr. Brooke-Hoskyn ? BROOKE. (Awkwardly) Short ones, ma'am. Frequent, but short. I have proposed the health of many gentlemen of distinction. RUTH. How clever you must be! BROOKE. (With exquisite modesty) Oh ! , (Sits L. of MRS. POSKETT) MADAME. How strangely empty the Walk looks without our fisherman! BASIL. (Who has gone up L. c.) I was wonder- ing what I missed. Of course! The Eyesore! RUTH. He leaves a blank. MARJOLAINE. He was a sort of statue, MRS. POSKETT. The Walk is not the Walk with- out him. SIR PETER. Why, he tried to drown your cat, ma'am ! MADAME. Oh, Sir Peter ! Have you driven him away? ALL. For shame, Sir Peter ! SIR PETER. (L.) B.ut, dash it and hang it I I haven't ! (Nobody believes him. All shake their heads gloomily. BARBARA rushes in great excitement out of No. 4.) BARBARA. (Skips across to M^RJCLAIITE R.) Marjory! Marjory! (Sh? stops alubed on see- ing the others) Oh I uidn't know (RuTH down R.) MADAME. A dish of tea, Miss Barbara? BARBARA. (Curtly) No! (Apologetically? Qg POMANDER WALK. Oh, no, thank you I Marjory, can I speak to you? SIR PETER. (L. of BARBARA, intervening with clumsy playfulness) Ah, Miss Barbara, I didn't see you in Church yesterday. BARBARA. (Confused) Wasn't I there ? I don't remember. SIR PETER. Come now, come now! What was the text? BARBARA. Oh, I know ! "If any of you know of any cause or just impediment " RUTH. (Shocked) Barbara ! MARJOLAINE. (Coming to the rescue) Come away, Babs. Don't worry her, Sir Peter. SIR PETER. (In despair) Even Missie! (Sits by MRS. POSKETT, gets up again immediately) RUTH. Try to put some sense in her, Miss Marjory. SIR PETER. (With a last effort) Well, ladies! To-morrow is the fourth of June. BROOKE. As this is the third, you might safely have left us to infer that, sir. (The two men face each other and speak across MRS. POSKETT.) SIR PETER. But it seems necessary to remind the bosom friend of H. R. H. the P. of W. that it is the birthday of His Most Gracious Majesty King George the Third! T(MRS. POSKETT holds cup near SIR PETER who unconsciously takes it) Ladies, I warn you not to be alarmed when you hear me fire the salute as usual. BROOKE. As usual! Ha! That brass popgun of yours SIR PETER. (Furious) Popgun ! (SiR PETER gives cup^ back to MRS. POSKETT) BROOKE. I said popgun, sir ! has never gone off yet! POMANDER WALK. 99 (MRS. POSKETT turns towards BROOKE-HOSKYN and unconsciously puts cup into his hand.) SIR PETER. Because some infernal scoundrel has always tampered with the charge ! But to-night 1*11 load it myself! ( BROOKE-HOSKYN gives cup back to MRS. POSKETT who drinks the remains of her tea) and, damme ! I'll take it to bed with me ! (He stumps off in a rage into No. i. On the way he runs first into BASIL, then into JIM) RUTH. (To MRS. POSKETT who is finishing her tea) We shall break him down, dear. (NANETTE and JIM clear away tea things and table, into No. 5. MADAME turns up stage. MRS. POSKETT, RUTH and BROOKE-HOSKYN also go np. MARJOLAINE and BARABARA down R.) BARBARA. (In deep conversation with MARJO- LAINE excitedly) Yes! He does surround it with flowers of speech, but he says it quite clearly. MARJOLAINE. Dear Doctor Johnson ! BARBARA. But I cannot bear the bird's eye on me. It is like Charles's. O Marjory, he looked at me so coldly all the time I was teaching him ! MARJOLAINE. Never mind how he 'ooked, if he'll only talk ! BARBARA. How can I ever thank you? MARJOLAINE. (Impulsively). Barbara, you may be able to help me! I'll tell you a great secret I am to be married to-morrow ! (Exit JIM into No. i.) BARBARA. (Screams) Oh! Oh! RUTH. (Turning) Is anything the matter? MARJOLAINE. No, no! (To BARBARA) Yes! married to-morrow ! Swear you will never tell any- body, if you live to be ninety ! ioo POMANDER WALK. BARBARA. Yes, oh, yes ! I mean, no, oh, no ! MARJOLAINE. And you must be my bridesmaid. BARBARA. Marjory! Who is it? MARJOLAINE. Sh! (Points to No. 3) There! BARBARA. (Speechless) Not Doctor Sternroyd! MARJOLAINE. No, no! There, at the window! (JACK is momentarily visible.) BARBARA. O how lovely. MARJOLAINE. Isn't he! (They sit c.) We're going to be married by licence. BARBARA. What's that? MARJOLAINE. I don't know. Doctor Sternroyd's getting it. It lets you be married anywhere, when- ever you like. BARBARA. Heavenly! If Doctor Johnson teaches Basil what I've taught Doctor Johnson, I'll have a licence too. (RUTH and BASIL are walking slowly from R. to L. at back.) MARJOLAINE. (Calling) Mr. Basil! BASIL. (Coming to them) Yes, Miss Marjory. MARJOLAINE. Barbara's not feeling very well BARBARA. (Drooping) No BASIL. Heavens ! Shall I play to her ? MARJOLAINE. (Innocently) No ; it's not so bad as that. But it's her evening hour with Doctor Johnson, and she is not quite equal to it RUTH. Why, bless my heart ! She's been sitting with that bird all day ! BARBARA. Unkind Ruth! The lonely bird! MARJOLAINE. So she wondered whether you would take her place for once BASIL. (Eagerly) Why, of course! With all the pleasure in life! POMANDER WALK; 101 'BARBARA. (Demurely) .*Q.h;! ,bat ;yp ; don't know what you are letting yourself in for ! ' RUTH. Yes. He swears horribly. (Joins MADAME and BROOKE-HOSKYN and MRS. POSKETT) BASIL. I'll be Orpheus with his lute. I'll play the Kreutzer Sonata to him. (Going towards house) MARJOLAINE. (Anxiously) No, no! Just let him talk ! Just let him talk ! (Rises) (BASIL dashes into No. 4.) BROOKE. (To RUTH, MRS. POSKETT and MADAME) Indeed, yes; (ADMIRAL appears at upper window and puts groundsel in thrush's cage) I am making a collection of my anecdotes. I shall call the book (BROOKE catches sight of ADMIRAL) " Pearls before Swine " Did I tell you my friend Sherry's bonn mott about the weather ? ALL. (With alacrity) Yes! Yes! (They turn and go up stage.) BROOKE. (Hurt) Pardon me. (Eagerly) Ah! but Miss Barbara was not here! (He buttonholes her, so to speak, takes her L. c. and booms) Im- agine, then, that you are standing just where you are standing, and I am Sheridan. You remember how we perspired on Saturday evening. (Suiting the action to the words) I come up to you so. I place my hand familiarly on your shoulder so (BARBARA winces) You understand: you are Sheridan no: I am Sheridan, and you are me. (JANE rushes out of No. 3. She ties white glove on door knocker and then comes down to BROOKE- HOSKYN) And I that is, Sheridan say to you I mean me Brooke, my boy JANE. (In a horrible whisper) Master ! Master ! 102 POMANDER WALK. . What >s,ijt? What the devil is it? Go away ! (tie goes to her) JANE. Master! (She whispers, pointing fran- tically at No. 3) BROOKE. (Violently disturbed) Eh? What? There, now! So like Selina! Spoilt the point of my story! (To everybody) Excuse me! (He and JANE go into No. 3. BARBARA goes to MAR- JOLAINE) MADAME. I think I shall go in. Marjolaine - ? MARJOLAINE. Oh, Maman I have so much to say to Barbara! MADAME. You are so feverish so unlike your- self ! You are not going to be indisposed - ? MARJOLAINE. I am so well So well! I never was so well ! (MADAME expresses uneasiness, and goes slowly into No. 5. NANETTE, who has already re- moved the tea-things, now carries in the table.) RUTH. (Talking with MRS. POSKETT, coming L. c.) Well that's what / should do. Bring him to his knees. MRS. POSKETT. I brought Poskett to his: why shouldn't I bring Peter ? RUTH. Strike while the iron's hot. He knows we're angry with him. Come along in. Put on your prettiest cap. I'll help you. (They go towards No. 2. DOCTOR STERNROYD comes round the corner. He is a carrying a number of grocer's parcels.) RUTH. Dear me, Doctor ! How you are loaded ! STERNROYD. (Confused) Good evening, ladies! Pray excuse me if I cannot remove my hat. MRS. POSKETT, And not books, this time? POMANDER WALK. 103 (MARJOLAINE and BARBARA cross to L.) STERNROYD. No, no, no. Parcels. Just parcels. Simple necessaries, I assure you. (RUTH and MRS. POSKETT go into No. 2. STERN- ROYD shuffles towards No. 3 and comes face to face with MARJOLAINE and BARBARA.) BARBARA. Doctor STERNROYD. More women! Simple necessaries, I do assure you. BARBARA. (Eagerly, alluding to the parcels) Doctor, which is the licence? STERNROYD. ( Taken aback ) Eh ? dear, dear, dear! Miss Marjory, you told her? MARJOLAINE. Of course. STERNROYD. Tut, tut! Dear, dear! What says the poet ? " Who was't betrayed the Capitol ? A woman ! " JACK. ( Who has cautiously to pened the window; in a hoarse whisper) Doctor! For heaven's sake look sharp with the victuals ! STERNROYD. (Flustered) There! There! The cuckoo in the nest! (He shuffles into No. 3. At the same moment BASIL, wildly excited, dashes out of No. 4) BASIL. (Breathless) Miss Barbara > BARBARA. (Leaning for support on MARJO- LAINE) Oh! He's coming! BASIL. Oh, Miss Barbara! MARJOLAINE. Did Dr. Johnson speak? (Crosses to R. of BARBARA) BASIL. Speak ! Ah, the gifted creature ! JACK. (From the window, in a whisper) Mar- jory! MARJOLAINE. (Turning to him) Oh take care! (She moves towards him} 104 POMANDER WALK. BARBARA. (Innocently) What did he say, Mr. Basil? JACK. (To MARJOLAINE) Come closer. (MARJOLAINE goes inside the gate.) BASIL. (To BARBARA) Shall I tell you? Dare I tell you? BARBARA. (In a flutter) You know best. BASIL. He said It was all in one breath He said : O-burn-your-lungs-and-liver-tell-Barbara you-love-her ! BARBARA. (Rapturously) Oh, Mr. Basil! (She sinks into his arms) BASIL. (Enthusiastically) But it's true! It's true ! Come ! Let me tell you my own way ! (He takes her into the summer-house) JACK. (To MARJOLAINE, who is now under the window) It's perfectly monstrous! The old fossil's brought two eggs, a red herring, and a pot of current jelly! (THE EYESORE comes to his post, and begins to fish.) MARJOLAINE. Poor Jack ! JACK. Is that rations for a grown man? Says he'll make an omelette. Two eggs ! An omelette ! Ho! BASIL. (In the summer-house) My own ! (He makes the word " own " sound like a lovely long- drawn organ note) BARBARA. My Basil! (Rapture. Embrace) JACK. Can't you send. (Pointing to the EYE- SORE) that object for food? MARJOLAINE. I daren't speak to him: he al- ways turns out to be somebody else. Jack, if you'll be good, I'll get it myself! JACK. Angel! Make haste! I'm starving! MANDER WALK Act Ifl Page 107 POMANDER WALK. 103 MARJOLAINE. If you hear me singing, look out of the window. (She runs into No. 5) BASIL. And now, what's the next thing to do ? BARBARA. We must tell Ruth. (Rises) BASIL, Yes ! At once ! (Rises) Oh ! I'll buy Doctor Johnson a golden chain ! (Slowly crossing L., embracing BARBARA all the way) BARBARA. And I'll wear it for him. The dear bird! BASIL and BARBARA. ( Together) The dear, dear bird! (MRS. POSKETT and RUTH come out of No. 2. MRS. POSKETT is magnificent.) BARBARA. Dear Ruth! Come in quickly. We have such news for you ! RUTH. Very well. (To MRS. POSKETT) Cour- age Lady Antrobus! (Goes into her house) (RUTH, BARBARA and BASIL go into No. 4. MRS. POSKETT reconnoitres. She sees the EYESORE. She goes to him.) MRS. POSKETT. (Looking carefully round) My good man Mister Sir You threw Sem- pronius into the river on Saturday (Offering him a coin) Here's a crown for you. (THE EYESORE bites it, spits on it, and pockets it.) MRS. POSKETT. I want you to knock at that door. (She points to No. i. Without moving from his place, the EYESORE picks up a stone and hurls it at the door. MRS. POSKETT utters a startled " Oh ! " THE EYESORE goes out, leaving his tackle. MRS. POSKETT goes to tree. JIM opens the door) JIM. (Looking round suspiciously) Cuss them 106 POMANDER WALK. boys ! (He turns to go in again, but comes down a little when MRS. POSKETT speaks) MRS. POSKETT. (Amiably) Good evening, Mr. Jim! JIM. (Touching his forelock) Bosun of the Admiral's gig, mum. MRS. POSKETT. What lovely peas ! JIM. Ah. Takes a uncommon lot o' moistenin', though. MRS. POSKETT. It is thirsty weather. (Moving down stage c.) JIM. And a truer word you never spoke. MRS. POSKETT. Mr. Bosun, I want to see the Admiral. JIM. Ah, 'tis dirty weather wi' him, mum, sure 'nough. HeVe a-locked himself in by himself, and he's a-swearin' somethin' 'orrible for to 'ear. MRS. POSKETT. Mr Bosun, would five shillings quench your thirst? JIM. Well, mum, I can't say but 'twould take the edge off it. MRS. POSKETT. But I must see Sir Peter. JIM. Sheer off a cable's length, then. (She does so L. He shouts) Admiral ahoy ! SIR PETER. (Opening his upstairs window) D'ye want to wake the dead? JIM. Axing your pardon, Admiral : sunset. SIR PETER. What of it, you lubber? JIM. Shall 7 haul the flag down, Admiral? SIR PETER. On your life! I've hoisted it and hauled it down with my own hands, morning and night, any time these five years. D'ye think I'll let a son of a sea-cook like you, do it now ? You wait till I come down. (Disappears) JIM. (To MRS. POSKETT) Got him, mum. (Coming down) MRS. POSKETT. (Giving him money) Here; and thank you. (Moves L.) JIM. Thank you, mum. POMANDER WALK. 107 SIR PETER. (Appears at Jus door. He sees MBS. POSKETT and stops) Jim I JIM. Ay, ay, sir. SIR. PETER. Haul it down yourself. (Going) JIM. No, Admiral. Not after what passed your lips. SIR PETER. Damme ! I can't leave it hoisted all night ! JIM. That's as mebbe. Even the son of a sea- cook 'as 'is feelin's, same as them what's 'igher placed. (Exit round corner) SIR PETER. (Shaking his fist after him) You mutinous scoundrel ! (He looks at MRS. POSKETT, then at the flag. Braces himself for the effort) Cheer up, my hearty ! (Hums) " Oh dear what can the matter be." MRS. POSKETT slowly sidles round by the railings towards SIR PETER. He hauls down the MRS. POSKETT. (When he is mixed up in the lines) Admiral - SIR PETER. Ma'am. MRS. POSKETT. Why do you force me to ad- dress you ? SIR PETER. Me! Force you ! Gobblessmy- soul! MRS. POSKETT. For your own good. Oh, Sir Peter, you was King of the Walk on Friday ; now Mr. Brooke-Hoskyn will usurp that title. (Sweeps down to R. c.) SIR PETER. (Furiously, comes out of his gar- den] Will he so, ma'am ! MRS. POSKETT. The Walk says you have low- ered the prestige of His Majesty's Navy. (Move* towards the elm) SIR PETER. (Following her) Dash it and hang it, ma'am, what do vou mean? io8 POMANDER WALK. MRS. POSKETT. Well you know what I mean. The entire Walk saw you press me to your heart. SIR PETER. I didn't did I ? MRS. POSKETT. The entire Walk witnessed the outrage. And the entire Walk is indignant that nothing has come of it. SIR PETER. Gobblessmysoul ! MRS. POSKETT. Oh, how unsailorlike ! That is what the Walk says : How unsailorlike ! SIR PETER. It doesn't say that ! MRS. POSKETT. It says that. I am only a lone widow. If Alderman Poskett were alive, he'd see you did the right thing by his wife. But I ! I must leave my once happy home! SIR PETER. But dash it and hang it ! MRS. POSKETT. Can I bear the sneers of a Pennymint? The arched eyebrows of a Brooke- Hoskyn? I must let my house. (With a glance at him) My freehold house. Let it to an undesirable tenant : a person with a mangle. SIR PETER. (Horrified) Gobblessmysoul! MRS. POSKETT. To be sure, the expense of mov- ing is nothing when one has four hundred a year in the Funds. (Again he is impressed) But, oh, my lovely furniture will be chipped ! And oh ! how shall I part from my friends? SIR PETER. But it's not so bad as that? MRS. POSKETT. It's worse! And that innocent cat, Sempronius ! What will he say ? He took a chill on Saturday. The change will kill him. (Sits c.) SIR PETER. (R.) Dash it and hang it, don't cry, ma'am ! MRS. POSKETT. It isn't as if I was older. I could be much older! But I'm young enough to have a tender heart. But never mind! I will be brave! You shall not see me weep! (Weeps bit- terly) SIR PETER. (In great mental distress) But POMANDER WALK. 109 Gobblessmysoul ! What am I to do with Jim, and the flag-staff, and the thrush, and the sweet peas? What am I to do with Number One? MRS. POSKETT. Knock a door through and make one house of them. O these paltry details! Keep everything as it is. Sweet peas! What more ap- propriate! Ain't I Pamela? Ain't you Peter? Don't they both begin with a sweet pea ? SIR PETER. Damme, you're right! You've swept me fore and aft! You've blown me out of the sea ! By George, ma'am, I'll marry you if you'll have me ! MRS. POSKETT. (Sinking on his breast) I'll have you, Peter ! I've got you ! SIR PETER. I'll haul the brass gun out and fire it to-night. (Enter OTFORD) That'll tell the Walk! MBS. POSKETT. I'll tell the Walk! (LORD OTFORD has turned the corner and come to the elm L.) OTFORD. {Scandalised) Peter! SIR PETER. (Starting) Gobblessmysoul! Ot- ford! MRS. POSKETT. Present me, Peter and tell him! (She clings to SIR PETER L. of him) SIR PETER. (To OTFORD) Um my neighbour ^-Mrs. Poskett MRS. POSKETT. Widow of Alderman Poskett. SIR PETER. Um Lord Otford I am she is we are No, hang it ! You tell him ! MRS. POSKETT. (Crossing towards OTFORD) Happy to meet any friend of my future husband. OTFORD. (Courteously, but preoccupied) Am I to understand ? SIR PETER. (Wiping his brozv) Yes, Jack. u nderstand. Understand, without further palaver. I io POMANDER WALK. OXFORD. My felicitations. Madam, can you spare him a little while? MRS. POSKETT. (Bridling) I'm sure no real friend of Sir Peter's would wish to tell him any- thing his future wife may not hear. OXFORD. I assure you, ma'am, the matter is strictly personal to myself. MRS. POSKETT. Naughty Lord Otford! Well, Peter, I'll wait at the gate. (She moves up) SIR PETER. (Dazed) That's right. Wait at the gate wait at the gate ! OTFORD. Peter Jack's disappeared! SIR PETER. Serves you right! OTFORD. Hang it ! (Pointing to MRS. POSKETT) Did I say, serves you right, just now ? Peter : he's run away with that gel! SIR PETER. That he hasn't. The gel's here. OTFORD. Fact ? SIR PETER. Solemn. OTFORD. Peter, do you know who her mother is? SIR PETER. (Getting angry) You're not going to begin that again. OTFORD. She's Lucy Pryor! SIR PETER. (Puzzled) Lucy Pryor l(With an exclamation) Not Lucy Pryor! OTFORD. Lucy Pryor! Ha! I was telling her how impossible the marriage was SIR PETER. (Slapping his knee with delight) And she turned out to be Lucy Pryor! Jack, my boy, you must have felt like six pennorth of ha'- pence, what? OTFORD. I did. But now I I want to see her again. SIR PETER. (Chuckling) Never know when you've had enough, eh? OTFORD. But she'll never allow me inside her house. She was magnificent. Patuit dea^ Peter! She came the goddess ! POMANDER WALK. in SIR PETER. (Delighted) Ha ! What did I tell ye? OXFORD. Can't you coax her out here? SIR PETER. Me ! No ! I've told you : I'll have nothing to do with it. (MRS. POSKETT has come down L.) MRS. POSKETT. (Playfully) Now, you two! I'm sure you've gossipped enough. OTFORD. (Quickly) Madam will you do me a great favour? Will you persuade Madame Lachesnais to come and taste the evening air not telling her I am here ? SIR PETER. Don't do anything of the sort, Pamela ! MRS. POSKETT. Peter, I'm ashamed of you. (Cross to SIR PETER. To LORD OTFORD playfully) With great pleasure my lord. Me and Peter's that happy : (Knowingly) we want to see everybody ditto. (She goes to No. 5., knocks, and is admitted. BROOKE-HOSKYN opens his upstair window. He is in his shirtsleeves. He ij distressed. He wipes his forehead with an an enormous bandana) SIR PETER. (Alluding to MRS. POSKETT'S re- mark) Gobblessmysoul ! Jack, is that it? Here, come in, and have a glass of port wine. ( They turn up) (They see BROOKE at his window, but they are on the right of the elm, so that BROOKE does not notice them.) OTFORD. (Stopping) Hoskyn, by all that's wonderful ! SIR PETER. Brooke-Hoskyn. I said you must know him. OTFORD. Know my old butler! I should think 112 POMANDER WALK. so. He married my cook, Mrs. Brooke ! And now he's City Toastmaster SIR PETER. By Jehoshaphat! Is that it? (Delighted) When the Walk knows that ! OXFORD. (Laughing) That's your man of fash- ion. Peter ! SIR PETER. (Having thought it over) No! Damme, no! He's a good fellow, and I'm not a blackguard! Jack, follow my lead. (Coming down to front of tree a little L. Cheerily to BROOKE) Hulloa, Brooke, my boy! Here's your old friend, Otf ord ! OTFORD. Glad to see you, Hoskyn BROOKE. (In real distress) O don't! O, my lord ! Not at this moment I ain't equal to it, your lordship I reely ain't. OTFORD. Sorry you're ill Too much to eat and too little to do. What you want is a family to keep you lively. BROOKE. (In despair) A family! O my Lord! (Disappears abrutly) '(OTFORD and SIR PETER go up into No. i. JACK cautiously opens his window and whistles "Pop goes the Weasel" BARBARA and BASIL appear at the ground floor window of No. 4. JACK whistles again.) BARBARA. (As if she were JULIET) Hark, Basil ! The nightingale ! (JACK whistles once more, more forcibly.) BASIL. (As if he were ROMEO) Do you think it is the nightingale, dearest ? (JACK whistles louder still.) BARBARA, At least let us make believe it is. POMANDER WALK. 113 (JACK whistles louder still.) BASIL. My own one ! ( They coo together in the window) (MRS. POSKETT and MADAME come out of No. 5.) MRS. POSKETT. The air is so balmy. (JACK disappears.) MADAME. We were just coming out. Marjo- laine is strangely restless. (MADAME sees BARBARA and BASIL in their ultra-sentimental attitude) Ah? __Why! Really? BARBARA. (Joyfully) Yes! We are to be married at once! We are going to ask Doctor Sternroyd to get us a licence! BASIL. (As before) My own! MADAME. Oh I am so very glad ! BASIL. (To BARBARA) Come in, my own, " lest the winds of heaven visit your face too roughly." (MARJOLAINE enters cautiously from the house carrying a pigeon-pie and a loaf of bread; care- fully concealing them as much as possible from the characters on the stage. She places them just inside the railings of the house where JACK is.) BARBARA. Ah, what a poet Dr. Johnson was! (BARBARA and BASIL close the window, each closes the side of the window opposite to them their arms crossing as the windows come together their lips meet. They then disappear inside.) MRS. POSKETT. (Alluding to them) Well I never! (To MADAME, as they come towards the ii4 POMANDER WALK. elm) I wanted you to be the first to know of my betrothal. MADAME. I hope he will make you very happy. (MRS. POSKETT and MADAME sit under the tree.) MRS. POSKETT. I'll see to that. MARJOLAINE. (Joi Ing them) Isn't it wonder- ful, Maman! An angel's wing has brushed over Pomander Walk, and everybody is going to be married. MADAME. Yes, my poor child. MARJOLAINE. (Sings) " In Scarlet town - " MADAME. Surely you are not going to sing? MRS. POSKETT. Let her, ma'am. 'Twill keep her quiet. (MRS. POSKETT and MADAME sit under the (MARJOLAINE stands between the elm and No. 5. She half turns towards them, and sings:) In Scarlet Town, where I was born, There was a fair maid dwellin' MADAME. (To MRS. POSKETT) Ah! these pathetic old ballads I (MARJOLAINE half -turning to No. 3 where JACK appears, peeping behind the curtain, sings rapidly:) A pigeon pie and a loaf of bread Are just inside thr railin'! (Enter LAMPLIGHTER. JACK excitedly looks out, brt cannot see the pc"c*l. Meanwhile the LAMPLIGHTER has come with h'.* I* ladder > and h^s lighted the upper lamp, swarming up the ladder to do so.) POMANDER WALK. 115 MADAME. The Lamplighter ! Is there no moon to night? MRS. POSKETT. Oh, he'll put the lamps out when the moon rises. MARJOLAINE. (Turning to them) All in the merry month of May When green buds they were swelling MADAME. I should like to congratule the Ad- miral. MRS. POSKETT. I'll send him out to you. (She rises, and goes towards No. i, turning to the right of the tree. MADAME accompanies her a little way. MRS. POSKETT goes into No. i) MARJOLAINE. (Turning towards JACK, singing rapidly, and pointing with violent gestures) You'll find the parcel where I say By lookin' or by smellin' !- (She runs across into gazebo.) '(JACK sees the parcel, and with a "Ha!" leaves the window. Now the LAMPLIGHTER is on his ladder at the second lamp, and from that emi- nence also sees the parcel. He comes down hur- riedly. MADAME turns.) MADAME. (Calling) Marjolame! MARJOLAINE. Me voila, Mamanf (Runs up to her t to .he right of the tree) (MADAME sits a little to the right of the trunk of the tree. MARJOLAINE crouches beside her, on the right, so that her mother has to turn away from the houses to speak to her. MARJOLAINE keeps a watchful eye on No. 3. THE LAMP- LIGHTEX, bent on capturing the parcel, is at th* ti6 POMANDER WALK. foot of his ladder. JACK appears at the door. They both stalk the parcel.) MADAME. (Gravely) Marjolaine, you are put- ting on this gaiety to please me. MARJOLAINE. No, Maman (She sees the LAMP- LIGHTER'S manoeuvre and exclaims) Oh! MADAME. Why do you cry out like that? MARJOLAINE. (Volubly, with a tremendous de- sire to laugh) Nothing, Maman. You are not to be anxious about me. I am quite happy. (She watches the race for the pie) MADAME. I saw Lord Otford on Saturday MARJOLAINE. (Inattentive) You saw (THE LAMPLIGHTER is gaining on JACK) Oh, Oh ! MADAME. (Indignant) Marjolaine! You are laughing ! MARJOLAINE. (Stifling) No! No! It was surprise ! MADAME. He was very stern very indignant but I told him you (THE LAMPLIGHTER snatches the parcel and bolts. JACK, -furious, wants to bolt after him, but sees LORD OTFORD, who has come out of No. i, and retires crestfallen into No. 3. MARJO- LAINE is seized with an uncontrollable fit of hysterical laughter and dashes into No. 5. LORD OTFORD comes down on the left of the tree, so that, when MADAME rises, amazed at MARJOLAINE'S behaviour, and turns to follow her, she finds herself face to face with him.) MADAME. Lord Otford OTFORD. Forgive me. MADAME. Pray allow me to pass. I am very anxious about my child. OTFORD. If I am any judge, that young lady is in the best of health and spirits. POMANDER WALK. 117 MADAME. You are mistaken. She is (Correct- ing herself) Yes, of course. She is quite happy. OXFORD. Then, will you favour me with a few moments ? MADAME. I can see no use renewing our painful OXFORD. (Interrupting her deprecatingly) I am in a grave perplexity. My son has disappeared MADAME. (Indignant) And you suspect us of harbouring him ! OXFORD. No, no ! On my honour, no ! MADAME. Then ? OXFORD. Ah do be patient! I am here on an errand of concifiation ! MADAME. (With a touch of scorn) Concilia- tion ! OXFORD. Jack is very dear to me. MADAME. Marjolaine is very dear to me! OXFORD. Precisely. 1 have been considering Are we justified in keeping these two young people apart ? MADAME. You say that? OXFORD. I do. I have made up my mind not to act my own father over again. If Jack loves your daughter, he is to marry her MADAME. That is no longer the question. My daughter refuses to marry your son. OXFORD. Why ? Because she does not love him ? (MADAME is silent; she sits.) OXFORD. (Sits beside her, L.) No! But only because you tell her to. She simply obeys out of habit. Ah! Why punish these children because I behaved like a fool years ago, when I knew no bet- ter? MADAME. But ! OXFORD. (Earnestly) And why punish me now Ii8 POMANDER WALK. *o late ? Is it not possible for me to atone Lucy ? MADAME. (Rising) Lord Otford ! OXFORD. Don't stop me now! Don't go away! Ah! We are puor creatures, at best! We go blindly pot our liappiness! Let us hark back, Lucy, and try to Ind the trail we missed ! MADAME. W ! OXFORD. I. MADAME. (Defiantly) I have been quite happy. OXFORD. I know it. And I am glad tc know it. MADAME. But I purchased my happiness dearly. (She turns to him) You have never realised the suffering you inflicted on me. OTFORD, I can imagine it. MADAME, No, you cannot. Only those who have gone through it, can imagine it. (Lost in her memories} Nature is very strong, and very merci- ful. I had never forgotten! Never, for one moment! But li-'e covered the memory. {Pause) Then Pierre came anc! ofihred me his companion- ship. I gave him all I could. Oh, the good, true, generous man! OXFORD. (With deep feeling) I honour him! MADAME. And I honour !:is memory. (Pause) OXFORD. We ure quite frank, Lucy: you loved your husband ; I oved my wife. MADAME. And there is no more to be said. (She rises) OXFORD. (He rises} Ah, but there is! Face your own soul, Lucy, ar d ' A\ me : did the thought of the old Vicarage ^cen ac Otford never haunt you? M/.DAME. Never with any suggestion of dis- loyal, to Pkire. OXFORJ). Of that I am sure. But it came. I know. (Quieter; with intensity) Lucy, Lucy, it was rtways tlicre f It ? er " -ft you, as it never left me. 1: ^as the fr?jrant refuge, into which we crept in our solitary moments. Never with dis- POMANDER WALK, 119 loyalty, on your side or mine; but for consolation; for rest. Is that true? MADAME. It was merely the echo of an old song OXFORD. But how sweet ! How tender I MADAME. And how sad! (She sits; with an effort) No, no! I banished it! OXFORD. (With strength; leaning over her) You could not ! No one can ! Think of these two children: Marjolaine and Jack. Suppose we part them now: suppose they go their different ways: do you think either of them will forget the flowing river, the sheltering elm, or the words they have whispered under it? Never! Lucy, Lucy, though we go astray from first love, though we misvalue it, yes ! though we desecrate it, it never dies ! On revient ton jours a ses premiers amours f MADAME. But we cannot retrace our steps; we cannot undo suffering; we cannot win back inno- cence. OXFORD. We can ! We started from the garden } we have been on a l^g journey, with its adven- tures, and now we ar- at the garden gate a^ain : the flowers we loved a*-e beckoning to us ; the t *.'ds we loved are calling us ! MADAME. We cannot recall the sunrise OXFORD. But the s^aset can be as beautiful! MADAME. We are old OXFORD. I d>n i' ! Bo I fee! old? Do you look old ? I can't vmlt fivr-harreci gate, but 1 ca;. open it, and gc the ouiei sico just as Quickly I MADVME. (Smiling) Bu* there arc other things OXFORL. There is, above all, happiness! If we have no chilcL ~ of our own, Lucy, w shall h^ve our granr 1 -chiidier ' MALA::E. N (R ; s) I have been too pe-- suasive. Mar,ola : -e's 1^ has bee,: nipped in the bud and Jack has run awcy f/om her. 120 POMANDER WALK. OXFORD. Not he, if I know the rascal ! You tell me Marjolaine is well and happy? MADAME. Yes, but hysterical. You saw for yourself. OXFORD. Is she a flighty coquette? MADAME. Certainly not ! OXFORD. Then I'll bet you a new hat No! a diamond tiara ! she knows where, Jack is ; and there's an understanding between 'em. Lucy ! both couples shall be married on the same day ! (She is in his arms) MADAME. (With horror) Jack! we shall have to tell them ! OXFORD. (With dismay) O Lord! MADAME. I can't face Marjolaine. OXFORD. Jack'll roast me properly! MADAME. How they'll laugh at us ! OXFORD. Let 'em! By Gad, it shall be happy laughter ! (SXERNROYD comes out of No. 3 with a very small white milk jug. At the same time the EYESORE and JIM come back arm in arm. They em- brace very affectionately.) MADAME. Sh! (To SXERNROYD) Why, Doc- tor, are you fetching milk so late? I can give you some. SXERNROYD. (With suppressed rage) No, Ma'am ! I am not seeking the lacteal fluid. As you see me, I, the Reverend Jacob Sternroyd, Doctor of Divinity, and Fellow of the Society of Antiquaries, am on my way to procure beer ! MADAME. (With a tinge of disgust) Oh? This is Lord Otford. SXERNROYD. (Drops the jug) Good heavens! OXFORD. (Picking up the pieces and handing them back) Allow me your jug, I think. By the POMANDER WALK. 121 way, Doctor, can you tell me anything about a Marriage licence? STERNROYD. (In guilty despair) I said so! I knew it would come out! (To MADAME) Miss Barbara told you ! MADAME. (Astonished) Yes! but STERNROYD. 1 wash ay hands of it ! Two whole days, one of which was the blessed Sabbath, I have been up to my neck in cabals and intrigues! I have done! My lord, it was very kind of you to approach the subject so considerately, but (He produces a document) here is what you ask for. His Grace was very reluctant, but the pipe, which I now fear was not genuine, did it. Hah ! My con- science is white again. I will tell the young fire- brand! (He calls) Jack! (He goes back into No. 3 )__ j ac k! OTFORD. But what is this? ? (He reads it by the light of the lamp) What do you say now, Lucy? "John Sayle, of Pomander Walk, in the Parish of Chiswick, bachelor, and Marjolaine Lachesnais, also of Pomander Walk, spinster ! MADAME. Under our very noses ! OXFORD. Old Dryasdust has gone to tell Jack. Let's see what desperate thing they'll do next Come ! (They go into the summer-house. The door of No. 3 is flung open, and JA ,K and STERNROYD a/>- pear struggling in the passage.) STERNROYD. But, my young friend ! (JiM meanders deviously from R. u. E. into No. I. THE EYES: RE r sumes his fishing.) JACK. (Furious) Let me pass I Five years I've 122 POMANDER WALK. been a sailor, but I can't think of the words I want i (He dashes down the steps) STERNROYD. Dear, dear! Tut, tut! (He re- tires, shuts the door, and comes into the sitting room on the ground floor, where he lights a shadrit lamp, and brews himself a jorum of punch) JACK. The old fool ! O my stars ! the silly old fool! (He knocks furiously at No. 5. NANETTE appears) Tell Miss Marjory, that NANETTE. (Impassive) Plait-il? JACK. O hang! Er Deet ah Madermerzell MARJOLAINE. (Appearing, with a cry) Jack-! Oh! what is it? JACK. Come out! Come out! (He brings her down to the front) NANETTE. (Alarmed) Ah, mais! Ou est-donc Madame? (She retires, leaving the door open) (JACK and MARJOLAINE come c.) JACK. (Breathlessly) Sternroyd! He had the licence! Had it we were to be married to-mor- row j an( l he's gone and given it to whom d'you think? To my father! MARJOLAINE. Oh ! Then all is over ! JACK. No! All's to begin again! Take me to your mother. Then I'll take you to my father. (OTFORD and MADAME have come out of the gasebo.) OTFORD. That's what you should have done at first, sir! JACK. Father ! MARJOLAINE. Maman! (She throws herself into her mother's arms) JACK. (Hotly) It's no use, sir! You can cut me off with a shilling, but I mean to marry Mar- jory. (Fumes) POMANDER WALK. 123 MARJOLAINE. Maman! he came back and I'm going to marry him ! OXFORD. Madame what do you say? MADAME. I say, God bless them. MARJOLAINE. (Amased) Maman! OXFORD. And I say, ditto! JACK. (Overjoyed) Marjory! (MARJOLAINE rushes to his arms. They meet be* tween MADAME and OTFORD.) OXFORD. (Drily) H'm. I believe this is a public thoroughfare. JACK. (Confuted) O, sir! Please give me back that document. OXFORD. Why, no, Jack, / want that. (He and MADAME look at each other guiltily) JACK. (Protesting) But, sir! OXFORD. (Shyly) Um it may come in useful er I, too, am John Sayle and urn I, too, am going to get married. JACK. (Gravely) Marjory, my father's trying to be funny. MARJOLAINE. (Watching her mother, who is in pretty confusion) Maman! I believe! I be- lieve ! (Enter LAMPLIGHXER with extinguisher on a pole.) OXFORD. (Coming between MARJOLAINE and JACK) Believe, my child, believe. (Kisses MAR- JOLAINE on forehead) Here's the document, Jack ; and ah there is a pleasant seat under the elm (MARJOLAINE and JACK go to tree and sit c.) and agreeable retirement in the ah gazebo. (He and MADAME go into the arbour) JACK. (Leading MARJOLAINE to the elm, where they sit) Marjory how wonderful! 124 POMANDER WALK. (SiR PETER and JIM are seen hauling a small brass canon out of No. i, followed by MRS. POSKETT. THE LAMPLIGHTER puts out the upper lamp. BARBARA and BASIL appear in the garden of No. 4. BASIL has his fiddle, and plays the KREUTZER SONATA (slow movement) very softly.) SIR PETER. Haul her out ! (JiM brings gun out of garden of No. I.) MRS. POSKETT. Oh, Peter! I'm frightened! JIM. (Hoarsely) It's all right, mum! I've emptied her. (They bring the gun nearly to the footlights. Tnfe LAMPLIGHTER puts out the lower lamp.) JACK. (To him) What are you doing? LAMPLIGHTER. (Pointing with his thumb over his shoulder) Moon! (Be goes up and off. SIR PETER ts just applying a piece of burning tow to the gun, when BROOKE-HOSKYN hurriedly throws open his upstair window and shouts in a horrible whisper) BROOKE. Sir Peter! Sir Peter! For heaven's sake, don't fire that gun ! SIR PETER. Why the devil not, sir? BROOKE, Sh! (More hoarsely still and with tremendous emphasis) It's a boy ! SIR PETER. Gobblessmysoul ! I'll be godfather ! (RuTH appears at her upstair window, leans out, plucks jasmine, and throws the blossoms on BARBARA and BASIL. NANETTE sta.ids in the doorway of No. 5. A glorious full moon leaps up at the back, fooding the whole stage with e warm yellow light. SIR PETER and MRS. POMANDER WALK. 123 POSKETT try to go into the gazebo, but are con- fronted by MADAME and OXFORD; they turn to the elm, which is occupied by JACK and MAR- JOLAINE, so they have to be content to remain standing R. c. THE EYESORE catches a fish. STERNROYD in his room, with a glass of punch in one hand, and a miniature in the other, solemnly drinks, saying:) STERNROYD. Araminta ! OXFORD. (In the arbour) Lucy! BARBARA and BASIL. (Together) My own! MARJOLAINE. (With a happy sigh) O Jack! RUXH. (In her window) Ah, well! I'm sure we all hope they'll live happy ever after ! SLOW CURTAIN. {On no account alter the lighting for the tableau.) HOTEL UNIVERSE Play without intermission by Philip Barry. Produced originally by the Theatre Guild at the Martin Beck The- atre, New York. 5 males, 4 females, i exterior scene. Mod- ern costumes. One of the most striking and original plays ever written by an American, and on the occasion of its production in New York it aroused heated controversy. It is the most ambitious and brilliant play Mr. Barry has ever attempted, and is concerned with the baffling problems which every adult human being is at some time forced to face. The characters seem hardly to exist at all in relation to other people, which is surely the reason why Mr. Barry discovered (some- what as Chekov discovered) that to invent a plot for them would be to deprive them of the kind of reality he was after. These people are essentially introspective, centripetal, literally self-seeking. And what are they after? Just an answer to the question that every thinking human being must ask himself and vainly: What is life? What if death? Where are we going, and why? What is the meaning of past, present and future? Published only in bound form. "A glittering play of unreality and magic to quicken the pulses and stir the minds . . ." Richard Lockridge, N. Y. Sun. (Royalty on application.) PRICE $2,00 per copy (in cloth). THE FARMER'S WIFE Comedy in 3 acts. By Eden Phillpotts. Produced origi- nally by Charles Coburn in New York City. 9 males, 13 females. 2 interiors. Modern costumes. This delightful comedy of English people was one of the long run successes in London before coming to New York. The story is concerned with Samuel Sweetland, a Devonshire farmer and a widower, who de- cides to marry again. Aided and abetted by his housekeeper, Araminta, he makes out a list of the various eligible women in the county and pro- poses to them in turn. But they all refuse him, and in the end he finds at home, in Araminta, the one woman. (Royalty on application.) PRICE 75 CENTS. BERKELEY SQUARE Play in 3 acts. By John L. Balderston. Produced origi- nally by Gilbert Miller and Leslie Howard at the Lyceum Theatre, New York. 7 males, 8 females, i interior. Modern and Eighteenth century costumes. Plays a full evening. Peter Standish, a young American architect, has inherited, so it seems, an old English house in which one of his ancestors had played an important role. Taking up his residence there, he discovers that he can walk back and forth through time, that he can step into the shoes of his ancestor and live the life that man lived in the Eighteenth cen- tury. He accepts the challenge of the adventure and finds himself en- tering the old drawing-room dressed in the costume of the time but still essentially himself, and he plays the game as well as he can. Much charms, but much also shocks him. His knowledge cf the future some- times trips him up, but the platitudes of the Nineteenth and the Twentieth centuries are brilliant epigrams to those about him. But despite his success he is not really at home. "Berkeley Square" is the finest play of the season a play that casts a spell." J. Brooks Atkinson, New York Times. "Unusual in flavor and right in entertainment deserves the atten- tion of every playgoer who wants to buy an evening of complete be- guilement." John Anderson, N. Y. Evening Journal. (Royalty will be quoted on application for cities and towns where it may be presented by amateurs.) PRICE 75 CENTS. HOLIDAY Comedy in 3 acts. By Philip Barry. Produced originally by Arthur Hopkins at the Plymouth Theatre, New York. 7 males, 5 females. 2 interiors. Modern costumes. Plays a full evening. Holiday, with Hope Williams, was one of the outstanding successes of the New York theatre, and later done in motion pictures with Ann Harding. It is the story of a young man who is engaged to a girl of great wealth and social standing. But he refuses to "make good" with her father, preferring to enjoy life as a holiday and an independ- ent venture in happiness. Because of this the two separate, but at the end the girl's sister realizing that the young man is right and her fam- ily wrong, confesses that she is in love with him and agrees to go away and marry him. A delightful and brilliant comedy. "One could ask for nothing better (except that it is dangerous to laugh so hard) than a stageful of Philip Barry characters indulging in his special brand of happy-go-lucky nonsense." Robert Littell; N. Y. Post. "It is continuously gay and amusing, blissfully mad, and stunningly sane, all at the same time. . . ." John Anderson, N. Y. Journal. (Royalty, fifty dollars.) PRICE $2.00 per copy (in cloth). REBOUND Comedy in 3 acts. By Donald Ogden Stewart. Produced originally by Arthur Hopkins at the Plymouth Theatre, New York. 7 males, 5 females. Modern costumes. Sara Jaffrey is twenty-eight, pretty, charming but unmarried when we first meet her in the home of her sister, Mrs. Crawford. Bill Trues- dale is much in love with Evie Lawrence, but she throws him over for the rich Lyman Patterson. Sara and Bill immediately become engaged and are married shortly after. We next find them on their honeymoon in Paris, where Bill is be- ginning to show early symptoms of being a neglectful husband even failing to show up to meet Sara's father. It appears that Evie and Lyman have turned up in Paris on their wedding tour and Bill has been spending the truant time with his old love. This devotion to Evie grows into alarming proportions despite Sara's pleading with Bill until she realizes love is not a thing to be begged for but a thing to com- mand. She switches her methods and Bill rebounds back to her arms with every indication of being a devoted husband. "The best light comedy written by anybody hereabouts in ten or twenty years." Heywood Broun, N. Y. Telegram. (Royalty, fifty dollars.) PRICE 7$ CENTS. THE ROYAL FAMILY Comedy in 3 acts. By George S. Kaufman and Edna Ferber. Produced originally by Jed Harris at the Selwyn Theatre, New York, n males, 6 females, i interior. Modern costumes. A tremendously interesting and fascinating story of a great family of the American stage. The Cavendishes, with which "The Royal Family" concerns itself, comprises three generations. First, there is Fanny Cavendish, wife of the deceased Aubrey Cavendish, "the first actor of his day," who at seventy is planning her tour for the coming season. There is her brother, Herbert Dean, a pompous player now in his decline; Julie, her daughter, is at the crest of her career as a Broadway star, Tony, her son, having forsaken the stage for Holly- wood, rushes home only to flee to Europe to escape the attention of a Polish picture actress. Soon he is back again in New York seeking refuge from a lovesick Balkan princess. A granddaughter, Gwen, just building into important ingenue roles, jolts the family by marrying a non-professional and forsaking the stage, but only temporarily. Through it all, Fanny Cavendish rules the household with her courage and a sharp tongue. Though her children are idols to the public, they are defenseless under the withering fire of the old lady's sarcasm. (Royalty on application.) PRICE 75 CENTS. FRENCH'S Standard Library Edition Includes Philip Barry Sidney Howard George Kaufman Harley Granville-Barker The Capeks Phil Dunning George Abbott Dorothy Parker Ferenc Molnar Hatcher Hughes A very Hop wood Ring Lardner Tom Gushing Elmer Rice Maxwell Ander50O The Quinteros Lynn Riggs Susan Glaspetl Rose Pranken John van Dniten Benn W. Levy Martha Stanley John Golden Don Marquis Beulah Marie Dlz Zona Gale Alfred Kreymborg P. G. Wodehouse Noel Coward Ian Hay J. B. Priestly Mary Roberts RindUUt Ashley Dukes George M. Cohan Augustus Thomas. Wlnchell Smith William Gillette Frank Craven Owen Davis Austin Strong A. A. Milne Harriet Ford Paul Green James Montgomery Edward Childs Carpeatcr Arthur Richman George Middleton Channing Pollock George Kaufman Martin Flavin Victor Mapes Kate Douglas Wlggia Rol Cooper Megrue Jean Webster George Broadhurst Madeline Lucette Ry ley Plays by Fred Ballard Percy MacKaye Willard Mack Jerome K. Jerome Mark Swan Rachel Crothcrs W. W. Jacobs Ernest Denny Kenyon Nicholson Edgar Selwyn Laurence Housman Israel Zangwill Walter Hackett A. E. Thomas Edna Ferber Justin Huntley McCarthy Frederick Lonsdale Rex Beach Paul Armstrong George Kelly Booth Tarkington George Ade J. C. and Elliott Nugent Barry Conners Edith Ellis Harold Brighouse Harvey J. O'Higgina Clare Kummer James Forbes William C. DeMille Louis N. Parker Lewis Beach Guy Bolton Edward E. Rose Marc Connelly Lynn Starling Josephine Preston Peabody Catherine Chisholm Cushing Clyde Fitch Earl Derr Biggers Thomas Broadhurst Charles Klein Bayard Veiller C. Haddon Chambers Richard Harding Davis Robert Housum Salisbury Field Leo Dietrlchtstein Eden Phillpotts Sir Arthur Conan Doyle Brandon Tynan Clayton Hamilton Edward Sheldon Edward Paulton Adelaide Matthews William Cary Duncan Send for our latest complete Catalogue SAMUEL FRENCH Oldest Play Publisher in the World 25 West 45th Street, 811 West 7th Street, New York, N. Y. Los Angeles, Calif. Gaylatnount pamph let Binder rA Bros-. !* D THE UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA LIBRARY