-> t-' «■. tglft » y\ v\JX sVVjL/WU/VlA>^ Jf ^ **s^c\ a^JK Ux A STRANGE CAREER L- a Strange Career LIFE AND ADVENTURES OF JOHN GLADWYN J EBB By HIS WIDOW WITH AN INTRODUCTION BY H. RIDER HAGGARD JUiaitl) portrait BOSTON ROBERTS BROTHERS 1895 §Hntbersttg $ress: John Wilson and Son, Cambridge, U.S.A. The compiler of this history wishes to state that its production has been materially aided by several sketches of the more striking among his adventures, which from time to time were set down by Mr Jebb himself. The story which he contributed to ' Blackwood's Magazine' for January 1872, entitled "The Haunted Enghenio," has been here reproduced in the slightly altered form in which it actually occurred. CONTENTS. PAGE Introduction . . - xv CHAPTER I. BOYHOOD, AND ENTRANCE INTO THE ARMY. Jack Jebb's parentage — Early life at Walton — Education at Bonn and at Chesterfield — Holidays at Firbeck — His daring and love of mischief — At school at Cheltenham — Favourite studies — An adventure at Leckhampton — Sent to an army coach — Enters Woolwich — Gazetted to the 88th Regiment — His mother's death — Has a premo- nition of the event — The last tie gone — Sails to join his regiment in India I CHAPTER II. INDIAN SERVICE. The route to India thirty years ago — Flirtation onboard ship — Jack Jebb's journey — A hypnotic experiment — Regimental duties — A midnight encounter with a native — Three years of hard work — Down with fever — An acrimonious native official — Indomitable British pluck — A night's imprisonment — A court scene — Recruiting strength on the hills 15 CHAPTER III. BUSINESS DISASTERS. Re-marriage of Rev. Mr. Jebb — Jack Jebb returns to Eng- land — Complicated business affairs — Resigns his com- mission — At Oxford University — Society, athletics, and reading — An odd apparition — Goes on a shooting tour viii Contents. to Skye — A comfortable income — Determines to specu- late — A partner in a Glasgow steel gun-barrel factory — An unfortunate strike — £23,000 lost in a year — Belated Government orders — Chafing under inaction — An expe- dition to Nicaragua — Experiences of a tropical climate — An adventure in Guatemala — Home again — Overend & Gurney's insolvency — Deprived of his remaining fortune — Employment a necessity — Learns sheep-farm- ing .... 29 CHAPTER IV. COFFEE-PLANTING IN BRAZIL. Farm-life in the Highlands — Amongst a silent folk — A haunted glen — Fresh enterprise — Assists in founding the White Star Line — Small gain from the undertaking — A business tour though the United States — Unconge- nial duties — Visit to Brazil — Manager on a coffee plan- tation — Supervision of negro labourers — Dark story of the fazenda — An instance of Jebb's unselfishness — Overwork and malaria — A moonlight ride through the forest — A vision of the night — Swamp fever — Peculiar receptive conditions of the mind 48 CHAPTER V. IN THE FAR WEST. Relapse of illness — Ordered to a colder climate — Getting used to his persistent ill-luck — Opportunely realises certain "expectations" — Sails for New York — Meets with an old frontiersman — After buffalo in the Far West — Some of the discomforts of camping out — Bob Harker's characteristic — Narrow escape from accidental shooting — A prairie murder — Conjectures as to the per- petrator — A long record of crime — A ghastly sign — Scare in regard to mountain travelling — The vigilantes fail to find a clue — Newspaper articles on the outrages — Personal danger 64 CHAPTER VI. AN ADVENTURE ON THE PLAINS. On the march — Precautions against Indians — " Sign " of buffalo — A bloody conspiracy on foot — A scout's loyalty Cotitents. ix — Further atrocities — Break-up of the hunting party — Jack Jebb joins in pursuit of the manslayer — The prob- able criminal and his rendezvous — Tracked — A descrip- tion of " Lost Park " — The scout's mode of attack — Retribution at last — A gruesome diary — The career of " Big Foot " — The long-cherished vengeance of a member of a Southern race 80 CHAPTER VII. SPORT IN COLORADO. Frontier law — Festivities at Alma — Renewed purpose of shooting big game — Setting out to the Rocky Mountains — Abundant sport, and episodes of a varied character — Bear-trapping in company of a partner — Another bear story — A close shave — Active hostility of the Utes — Work-ox versus steer-beef — Meets General Fremont, the discoverer of California — Resolves to see the "Golden State " — Effects of civilisation in the Western States — Denver and Leadville at the outset of their history — Impressions of San Francisco — Prospecting in Sacra- mento Valley — The gold-diggers and their ways — Suffer- ings from fever and ague — A desperate remedy — Perversity of his luck even with diseases — Back to Colo- rado 99 CHAPTER VIII. FURTHER PURSUIT OF GOLD. Purchase of the " Great Whale " mines at Denver — Jack Jebb's contribution of money to the scheme — Assumes chief management of the mines — His headquarters — Enjoys living in the Rocky Mountains — Boston friends on a neighbouring property — Dangers from Rapahoes — The bringing-in of provisions — The mails — Snow-shoe- ing the most convenient method of travel — Advantages of the Norwegian snow-shoe — An adventurous nocturnal journey — Meets with an accident — Tries a bold experi- ment — Strikes an old mining-camp — A false alarm — How "bear" tracks are made — Story of a grizzly hunt 117 Contents. CHAPTER IX.' THE ROCKY MOUNTAINS DURING WINTER. A mountain storm — A second night's camping out — Has a mishap in cooking with a powder labelled " Borwick's " — A toilsome journey — The very low temperature of the season — Discovers that he had taken strychnine — Fall in descending a mining-shaft — Another " near thing " — An exceptional winter — Plan of domestic management adopted by Jack Jebb and a companion — On short rations Reduced to the last extremity — An exception to a whole life's bad luck — A supper of elk — The snow lifts — His reflections on the events of the past months .... 133 CHAPTER X. AFFAIRS AT DENVER. Spring in a western mining-camp — Heavy outlay on the "Great Whale" mines — A consultation on the subject necessary — Starts for New York — Stay at Boston — American hospitality — The variety of religions in Boston Large spiritualistic element in its schools of thought — Anecdote of a seance — His interest in the Psychical Re- search Society — Sails for England — Family calls — Marriage and return to Denver — Methods of obtaining camp-supplies — A mysterious pedlar — Trapping bear — An amusing climax — The great eclipse in the Rockies — A magnificent spectacle — Effect of the phenomenon on a party of Utes — Jack Jebb and his neighbours — A re- markable feat 149 CHAPTER XI. LAST EFFORTS AS A PIONEER. The winter of 1S78 in Colorado — An extraordinary frost — A terrible journey through the storm — Fairly beaten by the weather — An avalanche sweeps away an entire camp — Jack Jebb leads a search party — Risk incurred by the searchers — Success of their efforts — The troubles at- tendant on mining — The concern at Denver turns out Contents. xi profitless — Back in New York — Becomes a partner in an omelette company — Awaiting developments — ('loses with a proposal to go out to Mexico as a manager of mines 169 CHAPTER XII. THE LAND OF MONTEZUMA. Different ways of getting to Mexico — Havana — Mexican ladies — Vera Cruz — Jack Jebb takes the railway route from New York — Events of the journey — The town of Mexico — His destination — Picturesque scenery — Is the first European in these sierras — Secures a faithful bodyguard — Friendliness of the workmen — "Poverty Row" — A dynamite scare — Domstic difficulties and how met — An ingenious official — A primitive state of society — The splendid climate — The Padre and his salary — An encouragement to matrimony — Relics of the old Aztec worship 188 CHAPTER XIII. A BRUSH WITH BANDITTI. Treachery in camp — The ex-manager, Don Eduardo, and his scheme of revenge — The gathering of the enemy — A discontented peon — Sebastiano drunk and Sebastiano sober — The plot leaks out — Peculiar arrangements for defence — A smart capture — An instance of summary justice — Power of the district Cacique — A supporter of the Emperor Maximilian — An old battle-ground — The Cacique's description of the fight — Devotion of the tribesmen to their chief — The clannish feeling still exist- ent in Mexico 207 CHAPTER XIV. MEXICAN HISTORY AND LEGEND. The Emperor Maximilian and his fate — His false coun- sellors — His chivalrous courage — The siege of Quere- taro — President Juarez — General Diaz — A case of diamond cut diamond — The strange mixture of absolute freedom and military despotism in Mexico — Progress of xii Contents. affairs at the mines — A breakdown of machinery — Divi- dends still in the distance — Heroism of an Indian lad — A Mexican superstition — The legend of Don Isidoro de la Vega — His hatred of the Spaniards — Don Miguel Gomez — Don Isidoro's vengeance — Sent a prisoner to the mines — His punishment — A wild tragedy . . . 224 CHAPTER XV. THE CITY OF MEXICO. Character of the peons — Relaxations of the English settlers — Jack Jebb's love of the capital — Illustrations of Mexi- can manners — An attack on the gaol — How a mob was managed — An " electrical " state of the political atmos- phere — Popular demonstrations — A tiny match-seller — A skirmish in the streets between military and civilians — A ludicrous anti-climax — Misplaeed philanthropy — The rule of President Diaz — His private character — Love of sport — Strict measures with banditti . . . 243 CHAPTER XVI. THE " KNIGHTS OF THE ROAD." A good day's sport — Reminiscences of travelling adven- tures — A general robbed four times in one day — Gen- erous bandits — A gentlemanly captor — Bandits of an amateurish cut — The limit of endurance reached — Corroboration of the narrative — Another tale — The employment of disbanded troops — A war-interlude in the interests of justice — Robber chiefs and the church — Death of Jebb's remaining aunt — Meets his second wife — Marriage postponed for financial reasons — An origi- nal honeymoon 259 CHAPTER XVII. SEARCH FOR TREASURE. Reconstruction of the mining concern — Jebb's large circle of acquaintances — A variety of business proposals — The hidden treasure of Guatamoc — An old chief's secret — A further story of buried millions — A Padre's vigilance — The hiding-place of Montezuma's treasure — Vigorous Contents. xiii explorations — Interesting finds — The totem-mark of Guatamoc — An underground passage — Proceedings abruptly stopped — Lingering belief in the existence of Montezuma's treasure 277 CHAPTER XVIII. FRESH FIELDS. A new gold-mine — An untrustworthy adviser — Seized with serious illness — Tries the sulphur baths at Puebla — The manufacture of antiquities — The bandits of Malinche — A Yankee drummer's prowess — The pyramid at Cholula — Return to work — Negotiates a mining property in the state of Chiapas — An unpleasant journey — Insect pests — Wonderful relics of a bygone civilisation — A sacred snake — Distress of a British tourist — On the look-out for antiquities — The ingenious American tourist 294 CHAPTER XIX. THE SIERRAS ONCE MORE. Mexican bull-fights — Bull-sports — Reseeks the sierras — Sent for by the Cacique — A supposed mysterious murder — Makes a discovery — The pursuit — Not a case of murder, but of insanity — A fierce resistance — Gratitude of the accused criminal — Popularity among the peons — At " Poverty Row " — Enjoyment of the free unconven- tional life — Birth of a son — Acquisition of an Aztec idol — Its apparent unlucky influence — Its first night on a foreign soil — Continued malign effects 310 CHAPTER XX. CLOSING YEARS. Residence in Mexico — An ancient house — Out-door pleasures — A pic-nic party at Patzcuaro — A famous picture — Business prosperity seems well assured — Sets out on a visit to England — A misadventure by the way — Arrival at New York — Settles in London — His evil star — Mexico once again — Last illness — Home to London — Death — Jack Jebb's life hardly a failure . 331 INTRODUCTION. It is a matter of common experience that among the many acquaintances we make from year to year, we chance now and again to find one whose personality has for us a singular attraction. Such was the fortune of the writer of this preface in the instance of his late friend John Gladwyn Jebb. I think it was in the year 1889 that I was introduced to Mr Jebb, one night at a London dinner-party, and I remember being impressed at first sight by his powerful build, his kindly face, and the peculiar gentleness of his brown eyes. Before the evening was over I found in him a person different from the generality of men — a man rich in a rare quaintness and originality of mind, and withal one of the most agreeable and interesting companions whom I had met for many a day. At that time Mr Jebb was at home on. a visit from Mexico, where he was engaged in busi- ness affairs, and it was of Mexico that he talked — its history, its legends, and many strange adventures which had befallen him there. This meeting led to others, and resulted at length in an invitation, that I accepted, to visit Mr Jebb xvi Introduction. in Mexico, when we proposed to explore some of the ruined cities in the Palenque district, and also to make an attempt to recover Monte- zuma's, or rather Guatemoc's, treasure, where- of the story is told in these pages. To the hiding-place of this hoard he had a key — now, as I believe, lost for ever. Accordingly, at the beginning of the year 1 89 1 I journeyed to Mexico, where I was warmly welcomed by Mr Jebb, and from that time I date my intimate acquaintance with him. All the things which we were to have done together we did not do, seeing that we were stayed by a sudden and terrible domestic calamity, whereof it is needless to write. Therefore it was that the ruined cities for which we were about to start remained unvis- ited and Guatemoc's treasure unsought. Still, we made several expeditions together, and among them a month's trip into the inte- rior of the State of Chiapas — on the whole the roughest piece of journeying that has come within my experience in any part of the world. It was as a travelling companion that Mr. Jebb showed at his very best ; for not until discomfort and even danger had been endured in his company, was it possible to measure his complete, his collossal unselfishness. When the nerves are shattered by sorrow and anxiety, and the body is worn out with petty vexations and weariness ; when the stomach turns at the Introduction, xvii nastiness that in the wilder parts of Mexico passes for food, and every square inch of skin is smarting from the stings of insect pests, — then it is, perhaps unconsciously, that the most patient and considerate of us are apt to revert to the primitive principle of "every man for himself." Not so Mr Jebb, however. If there were not enough hammocks, or a lack of room to swing them in the shed, it was he who insisted upon sleeping outside in the rain and on the ground; if there was a choice of places in the coach, it was he who sped to secure the worst one, and so forth. Indeed he carried this principle to extremes, as the following story will show. Among our baggage on the occasion of this journey into the depths of Chiapas was a mule- load of silver — some 3000 dollars of it, which we were conveying to the Santa Fe mine. One night we reached a certain inland town, and were hospitably entertained in one of the larg- est houses; still, as such a thing as robbery, highway and wholesale, has been heard of in the more remote districts of Mexico, Mr Jebb thought it safer to take to his bedroom the bullion which we were known to have in our charge. Now, as he learned afterwards from native sources, the possibility of possessing themselves of so much cash proved too much for the feeble honesty of sundry of the inhabi- xviii Introduction. tants of this town, who entered into an agree- ment to steal the dollars that night, and should we interfere in the matter, incidentally to cut our throats. About midnight these worthies began to attempt the execution of their plan. As it chanced, Mr Jebb and myself occupied differ- ent sleeping-places, separated by the length of a large eating-room. The house stood upon the edge of a very steep slope, at the foot of which ran a river, and immediately beneath the rickety and latchless French windows of Mr Jebb's room rose a supporting wall built of loose stones. In the middle of the night I was awakened two or three times by the furious barking of some curs belonging to the establishment as they rushed through the gardens on the slope; but the noise ceasing after a while, having ascertained that my revolver was at hand, I went to sleep again, thinking no more of the matter. In the morning Mr Jebb, who had risen early to make inquiry and investigations, asked me if I had been disturbed in the night. Then he told me this story. It seems' that he had some suspicion that an attempt would be made to steal the silver, and therefore he slept very lightly. In due course the barking of the dogs roused him, and he crept from his bed to the French windows, which it was impossible to Introduction. xix secure, and listened. Hearing the robbers whis- pering below at the foot of the wall, he retreated to the bed again and seated himself on the edge of it, holding a wax match in one hand and his long-barrelled Colt cocked in the other. This was his plan : to wait till he heard the thieves push open the French windows, then to strike the match (for the night was pitch-dark), and by its light to fire at them over it before they could attack him. For a long while he sat thus, and twice he heard the loose stones dropping as his assail- ants began to climb up the wall beneath the window; but on each occasion they were fright- ened by the clamour of the dogs, which at length grew so loud that, thinking our Indian servants, who slept at a distance from the house, would be aroused, the thieves took to flight without the dollars, leaving nothing but some footprints behind them. "And why did you not come and wake me? " I asked, when he had finished his tale. "Oh," he answered, "I nearly did so, but I knew that you were very tired ; also there was no use in both of us handing in our checks, for there were a dozen of those devils, and had they got into the room, for their own sakes they would have made a clean sweep of us. " I did not make any reply; but I remember thinking, and I still think, that this conduct showed great courage and great unselfishness xx Introduction. on the part of Mr Jebb. Most people would have retreated at the first alarm ; but this, with the utter fearlessness which was one of his characteristics, he did not do, since the dollars in his charge were too heavy to carry; and before men could be found to assist him, they would have been secured by the robbers, who knew well where to look for them. In the rare event, however, of the supply of personal pluck proving equal to such an occasion, how many of us, for the reasons given, having a well- armed white companion at hand, would have neglected to summon him to take his part in the fray ? A man must be very brave and very unselfish indeed to choose to face a band of Mexican cut-throats alone when a word would bring a comrade to his side. I have told the story of this particular little adventure at length, although it is trivial com- pared to many others which are to be read of in this book, because I happen to be personally acquainted with the details, which serve to il- lustrate one side of my late friend's character. Into Mr Jebb's history I do not propose to enter, for it is set out hereafter by his biogra- pher. Rarely if ever in this nineteenth cen- tury has a man lived so strange and varied an existence. "Adventures are to the adventur- ous/' the saying tells us, and certainly they were to Mr Jebb. From the time that he came to manhood he was a wanderer; and how it Introduction. xxi chanced that he survived the many perils of his daily life is nothing less than a mystery. In the end, however, they brought his fate upon him prematurely; for the diseases of which he died resulted from neglected illnesses and con- tinual exposure that would have sufficed again and again to kill any one of a less perfect constitution. When I returned to England in 1891 he came also, and for a while took up his abode in Lon- don. Soon, however, his old restlessness and his love of sunshine got the better of him, and he journeyed back to Mexico armed with an invention for extracting metals from refractory ores by a new process which, he was convinced, would bring in thousands. As might be ex- pected, it did nothing of the sort; indeed it broke down utterly when put to the proof, and Mr Jebb's health with it. For the last of many times, a mere wreck of his former self, he crossed the Atlantic homewards, to die in London, after much suffering most patiently endured, on the iSth March 1893. On next page is reproduced a fragment of a letter which he wrote to me, dated shortly before his death. I believe that these are the very last words he was able to pen, and it will be seen that his strength failed him before he could complete them. It only remains for me, if I may venture to do so, to say a few words as to Mr Jebb's char- xxii Introduction. acter, which in many ways strikes me as one of the most attractive that ever came under my observation. Of all friends he was the gentlest and truest; of all men the most trustful. Indeed it was this childlike guilelessness that ruined him, for throughout his life he was the prey of his own sanguine temperament. He worked hard for Introduction. xxiii many years, worked as few men work, and yet I believe I am right in saying that he never once got the best of a bargain, or had to do with an enterprise which proved successful — at any rate, so far as his own interests were concerned. It is not wonderful, therefore, beginning life as a rich man, that he ended it as a poor one. Yet so perfectly upright was his nature, that never did the slightest blame or suspicion attach to him among so many failures; and every time that he discovered afresh the imperfections of commercial humanity, it seemed to come upon him as a surprise. In the city of Mexico, where business men are — business men, he was respected univer- sally, and by the Indians he was adored. " He is a good man, Jebb, " said an honourable old Jewish trader of that city to me, — "a man among a thousand, whom I would trust anywhere. See, I will prove it to you, Amigo ; he has lived in this town doing business for years, yet, with all his opportunities, he leaves it poorer tJian lie came here. Did you ever hear 'the like of that, Amigo?" And so it came about that John Gladwvn Jebb left both Mexico and this land, where we have "no abiding city," almost as naked of the world's goods as when he entered it. He was not suited to the life that fell to his lot, at least not to the commercial side of it, for an adven- xxiv Introduction. turer — using the term in its best sense — he must always have been. He was too sanguine, too romantic, too easily deluded by others, and too mystical — a curious vein of mysticism was one of his most striking characteristics — for this nineteenth century. As a crusader, or as a knight-errant, doubtless he would have been a brilliant success, but as a manager of compa- nies and a director of business matters it must be confessed that he was a failure. Would that there existed more of such noble failures — the ignoble are sufficiently abundant — for then the world might be cleaner than it is. It matters little now: his day is done, and he has journeyed to that wonderful Hereafter of which during life he had so clear a vision, and that was so often the subject of his delight- ful and suggestive talk. But his record remains, the record of a brave and generous man who, as I firmly believe, never did, never even contem- plated, a mean or a doubtful act. To those who knew him and have lost sight of him there remain also a bright and chival- rous example and the memory of a most perfect gentleman. H. RIDER HAGGARD. DlTCHlNGHAM, 21 st August, 1894. A STRANGE CAREER. CHAPTER I. BOYHOOD, AND ENTRANCE INTO THE ARMY. JACK JEBB'S PARENTAGE EARLY LIFE AT WALTON — EDUCA- TION AT BONN AND AT CHESTERFIELD — HOLIDAYS AT FIR- BECK — HIS DARING AND LOVE OF MISCHIEF — AT SCHOOL AT CHELTENHAM — FAVOURITE STUDIES — AN ADVENTURE AT LECKHAMPTON — SENT TO AN ARMY COACH — ENTERS WOOLWICH — GAZETTED TO THE 88TH REGIMENT HIS MOTHER'S DEATH — HAS A PREMONITION OF THE EVENT THE LAST TIE GONE SAILS TO JOIN HIS REGIMENT IN INDIA. In telling the life story of a real or a fictitious personage, it is usual to start at the beginning and plod on more or less steadily, until at the last " Finis " can be added to the adventures or the days of the hero. But there are times when the chronicler feels that it would be easier to begin at the end — when the character has at- tained to all that it ever will of good and of evil, and when we can see by what strange chances and weary paths it came to its maturity. i 2 Boyhood, and Entrance into the Army. As this book is intended, however, to be a sketch of many adventures in distant lands rather than of the manly and loyal nature of him who underwent them, it shall follow the orthodox course. There are many disadvantages about being an only child ; and if there are any corresponding benefits to be derived from that fact, the subject of this memoir, John Beveridge Gladwyn Jebb, never profited by them. Born in 1841, when both his parents had passed their first youth, he was naturally regarded by them as a sort of Koh- i-noor, a roc's egg, or something equally rare and priceless. They agreed in doing their best to spoil him; but unfortunately they held di- ametrically opposite views as to the best way of performing the operation. There is no need to go further back in the annals of the Jebb family history than to the time of John's grandfather, himself an only son, who at one time possessed considerable property both in England and in the West Indies, but who, through various mischances, died a com- paratively poor man. The small estate of Wal- ton, Derbyshire, was entailed on his eldest son, Sir Joshua Jebb, K.C.B., Director-General of Prisons, who, not wishing to live there, sold it to Family " Jars." 3 his third brother, the Rev. John Beveridge Jebb, who, since his marriage in 1839 with Charlotte, eldest daughter of Mr Richard Dann of Water- mouth, Devon, had lived at Walton with his father until the death of the latter in 1845. The Rev. J. B. Jebb, who held the living of Walton together with that of Brampton, Chester- field, was a person decidedly above the average in ability. The same may be said of his wife. Moreover, the couple had this in common, that they both held strong and settled opinions on life, religion, and other leading questions. For the first few years of marriage they were strongly attached to each other, though there arose between them the usual- amount of oc- casional "jars"; but unfortunately the "jars" multiplied and the affection diminished as time went by. It was a case of misunderstanding; for there was no deep root of bitterness in either. The fortune was chiefly on the side of Mrs Jebb, who had given her husband absolute power over it, and he was not sufficiently mind- ful of the generosity she had shown. This cir- cumstance is only touched upon because of its effect upon the training and character of the son. The one thing in which there was perfect accord between husband and wife was their 4 Boyhood, and Entrance into the Army. intense love for the lad, who very early showed signs of a strong and original character. Cousins much older than himself, who remember " Jack " (as from boyhood he insisted on being called) in the arms of his tall, gaunt, faithful nurse, talk of his dark eyes, even then intent and searching. At that early age they say his powers of observation were remarkable, and that he would ask questions and make remarks with an intelligence beyond his years. They tell a story of his escaping from the faithful one into the farmyard, when he was two years old, and being shortly discovered holding on with both hands to the throat of a half-strangled gander which had flown at him. As he had no com- panions, it was fortunate for him that he was not at all a gregarious child : indeed, from the time he could run alone, his chief joy was to get away from every one, and hiding in the woods, to play at being a solitary Red Indian by his camp fire. In 1 850, at the early age of nine, he was sent to a private school at Bonn, where he picked up the German language and the noble art of fisticuffs at one and the same time. He had the misfortune to be the youngest pupil in the school, and there- fore never got a boy of his own size to fight; but School Experiences. 5 probably that was good training, for before he left he could " lick " half the school. Everything had to be fought for, and the weakest, as usual, went to the wall ; so for the first few months poor little Jack Jebb had a very rough time. All letters were read by the master before being sent, so he could not complain to those at home of the insufficient food and bed-clothing, which the tenderly-cared-for boy suffered from greatly. The school had been highly recommended to his parents, who believed they were doing the best thing possible for their son, while they travelled about the Continent for the benefit of his father's health, which was never good. However, in spite of occasional hunger and con- tinuous black eyes, Jack fought his way to the top of the school and to the mature age of eleven, when he was taken home and delivered over to a clergyman at Chesterfield — a clever man and a very good fellow — for the continuance of his education. He was glad enough of the change, for in time fighting will pall even upon a boy if he only gets enough of it, and that had been the one thing of which there was a plentiful supply at the German school. Moreover, he now spent a good part of his holi- days with his aunt, Mrs Miles, a wealthy widow, 6 Boyhood, and Entrance into the Army. then living at Clifton, but who shortly afterwards bought a lovely old place in Yorkshire, where the harum-scarum boy was allowed to run as wild as he liked. Usually there were a dozen or more young cousins all stopping there together. Their ages ranged from twelve to eighteen, and they were ripe for any sort of mischief into which Jack — generally the ruling spirit — would lead them. Those who were not admitted to late dinner used to hang about the dining-room door, coaxing the old butler out of such dishes as looked tempting and he could be induced to give to them. They also coaxed him out of a good deal of "language" once. It happened this way. A large dinner-party was to take place — a typi- cal county solemnity — and the old butler, of course, felt himself to be the pivot on which everything turned ; so until about five minutes before the first arrival was expected, he fussed and fidgeted, ordered and reproved, in the din- ing-room, and then betook himself to his bed- room for a last review of his own irreproachable appearance. No sooner was he inside the room than the key was turned in the lock by his natural enemies, the "young gentlemen," who adjured him (through the keyhole) to keep calm ! But when he heard the first carriage drive up the strength At Firbcck. 7 of his feelings became too much for his respect- ability, and his language was " frequent and pain- ful and free." They kept him there until he began to show signs of being about to break down the door, with some of the family plate as a battering-ram, when they hastily unlocked it and fled. He had not time to settle matters with his persecutors then, but he got even eventually by means of some peculiarly cheap and nasty sherry, which he ever afterwards declared was the only wine he was allowed to give them ! Another delight in Jack's frequent visits to Firbeck was the capital hunting to be got with Lord Galway's pack ; and probably some of the happiest mo- ments of his life were when, " well up " on his little brown mare, there was a good scent, and he could follow the hounds over fences and ditches through some of the loveliest country to be found in England. When at home at Walton his life was much quieter and duller, which may account for the fact that, with all his hardihood and sense of humour, there was throughout his career an under-current of melancholy and fatalism. At about fourteen he was thought to be ready for a public school, and after a few months on the Continent with his father and tutor, he was sent to Cheltenham. His own desire, like that of most 8 Boyhood, and Entrance into the Army. boys at some period of their lives, was to go to sea. With Jack Jebb the wish was no light o' love,' but the passion of his life; and long years afterwards, whether lying on a moonlit deck half the night listening to the swish of the waves and watching the tropical stars, or helping to throw cargo overboard to lighten a labouring ship in an angry sea, he had the misery of feeling that here was his vocation and he had missed it ! At Chel- tenham he distinguished himself chiefly by his drawing and painting, which were so much above the average that it was said of him later by an authority on the subject, that if he did not make his fortune on the operatic stage by means of his beautiful voice, he ought to make it as an artist. I regret to say that while at Cheltenham he was also distinguished for being the head and front of any mischief that might be on foot, as when once he went off to Leckhampton with a couple more boys, for the purpose of pistol-practice, well knowing that the owner of Leckhampton Hill strongly objected to his lands being made the happy hunting-ground of a lot of schoolboys, and that he had ordered his workmen to capture and consign to the authorities any college youth who might be found upon them. Of course this gave a charm to the proceedings, and the Firing the Gorse. 9 lads shot gaily all one afternoon, smoking the while — they didn't like it, but thought it the thing to do — and never noticed that they were being " stalked " by a party of workmen, who had divided themselves into groups and were surrounding the boys on three sides of the hill, the fourth being occupied by a stone quarry, almost impassable, and therefore considered safe. When the boys first caught sight of the men, they were not more than 200 yards off, and there was very little time left for reflection. " I have it," said Jack. "Let us divide and fire the gorse in a line. The wind is blowing away from the quarry and towards the men. They won't be able to follow us through the smoke, and we must scramble down the quarry somehow." This brilliant idea was acted upon, and they got out of the quarry in safety, dodging a gamekeeper by the way, and lighting a fire along the foot of the hill, which effectually kept the pursuers in check for an hour — long enough for the incendiaries to walk calmly home, glowing with the consciousness of a well-spent afternoon. Tricks of this sort at school, and similar pro- ceedings at home, soon gave Jack the reputation of being about as reckless and unmanageable as even a schoolboy could be. Therefore, when on io Boyhood, and Entrance into the Army. his sixteenth birthday his father invited a party of friends and relations, and semi-publicly pre- sented him with a gun, saying in the course of his speech that his son had never caused him a moment's anxiety in his life, a subdued titter ran through the audience, who knew well that there were very few moments of the reverend speaker's existence which were ?/;ztroubled by anxiety as to what his young scapegrace might be doing next ! However, when Jack left Chel- tenham, he did so with the assurance of his house-master that he was a " noble and truthful boy " ; and well knowing that to be the fact, his parents could afford to forgive him a few " mistakes of youth." After leaving Cheltenham he was sent to an army coach at Putney, to be crammed for Wool- wich, in spite of his decided preference for the sister service. As may be imagined, a healthy active boy, with a hatred of town life and no love for his future profession, did not take very kindly to the coach and his methods, especially as the latter were very autocratic. But a little in- cident soon occurred which had the effect of caus- ing the tutor to relax his rules considerably. At that time Cremorne was in full swing, and Leotard was drawing crowds nightly. Of course the half- Inside Crcmornc. 1 1 dozen lads engaged in cramming at Putney were wild to see him, though they had little hope of obtaining leave to do so. However, there was no harm in trying; so one day, with young Jebb as spokesman, they went in a body to their master and begged for the embargo to be taken off Cre- morne, if only for one night. They were met by a stern refusal, and the assurance that the master himself would not dream of visiting such a sink of iniquity. Having been refused leave, naturally their next idea was how to get there without it ; and they adopted the simple and obvious plan, to a boy, of climbing out of a bedroom window, sliding down the drain-pipe, and trusting to a rope and each other's shoulders for getting back again. This was all very well as far as it went ; but a contre- temps they had not counted on was that, just in- side the gates of Cremorne, they almost ran into the arms of their tutor himself! But Providence was kind to them even at that awful moment, for before they could begin to stammer out ex- cuses the coach said hurriedly, " You had better not mention to my wife that we met here, as she does not approve of Cremorne, and I only came to see Leotard." " That's all we came for, sir," replied the boys, 12 Boyhood, and Entrance into the Army. departing promptly before their master recovered sufficient presence of mind to send them home. Whether the memory of his previous diatribe or the fear of his better-half lay heaviest on his soul I don't know, but the boys never heard another word of their adventure. They loyally held their peace to the lady, and her lord made their yoke a little lighter. After about a year of fortifications, mathe- matics, and similar joys at Putney, Jack went to Woolwich. When the examinations came off, he passed well in most subjects, but was plucked for mixed mathematics, and had gone home to perfect himself in this science, when he received a notice from the War Office informing him that, as he was proficient in the other branches, and had only failed in one, he might be gazetted at once for service in India, if he chose. At that time so many officers had been killed and wounded in the terrible retribution which followed the Mutiny, that the War Office de- cided on sending out all cadets who had gained a certain number of marks. Jack Jebb caught eagerly at the chance. With his adventurous roving spirit, the one thing which could content him with the profession he had been obliged to adopt was the hope of active service. He was Death of Mrs Jebb. 13 gazetted to the 88th Regiment, then under or- ders to sail almost immediately; and but for the anxiety which his mother's health was causing, he would have been very glad to start. Mrs Jebb had been ailing for some time, and had been moved to London in order to be with- in reach of the best advice. The natures of father and son were too diametrically opposed for them to find much in common with each other as the lad grew to manhood, but between his mother and himself there always existed the strongest sympathy and devotion, so that they both felt that when the parting came it would be very bitter. But it was not to be as they expected. Shortly before sailing Jack was dining with some cousins, when in the middle of dinner he started up suddenly from the table with a white face, saying, " My mother is dying! " Of course his cousins tried to persuade him that if his mother were worse he would certainly have heard of it; but he persisted that he was right, and with a heavy heart started home immediately, only to be met on the threshold with the news of Mrs Jebb's death. She had been seized quite sud- denly, and had died with her eyes fixed in a long last look on that portrait of her only son, which stood always by her bedside. In what strange 14 Boyhood, and Entrance into the Army. fashion her latest thought and yearning had communicated itself to him, who shall say ? If it be true that a man's last thought and cry, when his life is going out, is for her who cared for his earliest years, how much more likely is it that the supreme enduring mother-love should be able to conquer space and circumstance that it may take farewell of its beloved ! Jack's grief was silent and deep. He felt that now he had little to regret in leaving the empty home ; and when the time came for him to sail to join his regiment, he probably left fewer living memories behind than most of those with whom he voyaged to distant lands. CHAPTER II. INDIAN SERVICE. THE ROUTE TO INDIA THIRTY YEARS AGO — FLIRTATION ON BOARD SHIP — JACK JEBB'S JOURNEY — A HYPNOTIC EX- PERIMENT REGIMENTAL DUTIES A MIDNIGHT ENCOUN- TER WITH A NATIVE — THREE YEARS OF HARD WORK DOWN WITH FEVER AN ACRIMONIOUS NATIVE OFFICIAL INDOMITABLE BRITISH PLUCK A NIGHT'S IMPRISON- MENT A COURT SCENE RECRUITING STRENGTH ON THE HILLS. In those days a voyage was a voyage, and took time. Thirty years ago people were not so much given to " running across " a few thousand miles of land and ocean on the smallest possible ex- cuse. They did their travelling slowly and with much forethought, and if any of them suffered from the restlessness of this generation, they usually concealed it in a shamefaced way, as they might have hidden a tendency to shirk afternoon church in the dog-days. There is no need to describe the journey to India, because most people have taken it, and know all about the heat and the gossip, the cliques and the flir- 1 6 Indian Service. tations, on every P. and 0. that sails the seas. Sometimes those same flirtations end in love and a cottage for two, but more often the result is unpleasantness for somebody. There was once a girl who was going out to be married, and who confided to about ten people (by moonlight) that she adored the man she was engaged to. Unfortunately for him, her adoration was unable to stand the test of a shadowy deck-corner in the tropics, and the in- sidious advances of the ship's doctor, who ap- peared to consider that the most important of his duties was to make love to the prettiest girl aboard, and who had a nice little wife at home who understood his weaknesses and did not mind them in the least. Well, this particular girl, not understanding the rules of the game, took it all in dead earnest, and when land and her fiance" appeared, his entreaties and arguments notwith- standing, she refused to quit the ship without the doctor, who meanwhile had fled to his cabin, from which sanctuary he refused to emerge until his would-be abductress had gone. Eventually the girl was taken below and matters were ex- plained to her by several matrons (assisted by a damp towel), so that she finally consented to be led away by the unhappy being who was to Incident on Board Ship. \y have charge of her affections for the rest of his life. One wonders how they settled it, and whether in their matrimonial bickerings the mention of that voyage ever failed to reduce her to a pulpy silence ! On the ship which was bearing Jack Jebb to his new duties only one incident occurred to break the monotony of the voyage. There was a pretty but rather " loud " looking woman on board, who gave herself out to be the wife of a high official " up country." Several passengers knew of the man, but had never heard that he had a wife ; and this fact, together with her manner and appearance, surrounded her with a slight air of mystery, though, as she was decidedly amusing, no one hesitated about making acquaintance with her, until a curious event brought about a change. Late one evening conversation in the reading- room turned on mesmerism, and Mrs B. re- marked that she made a capital subject, although she had no power over other people. Whereupon Jack, knowing a little of the art, and being greatly interested in it, offered to try to send her into a trance. The lady was quite willing to be experi- mented upon, and a group of spectators gathered round to watch the "passes," which soon had the effect of sending her into a deep sleep. 2 1 8 Indian Service. Directly she became unconscious she began to talk, and it was soon evident that she was em- barking on a narrative of her past history, which seemed to have been varied, to say the least of it ! " We must wake her before she goes any further," said Jack; but this was not easy, for nothing that any of them could do had the slightest effect upon her, and her even, monoto- nous voice went on ceaselessly. And the tale that she told was such, that first the chaperons sent their young people off to bed, and next they themselves fled before that terrible truthful voice, until only a few men were left in the room. They also got tired of it at last, as hour after hour went past and there seemed to be no chance of Mrs B.'s awaking, and one by one they dropped off, until only Jack and another man were left. Towards 2 A. M. the latter showed signs of departure also, but Jack put his back against the door and said, "No; you have got to stop with me in this room until she wakes, in order to see fair-play, and we must each give our word of honour never to repeat what this woman is unconsciously revealing." The man, a young civilian, agreed, and they both sat down again, while that changeless voice continued its tale. It told them some things Effect of Hypnotism. 19 which they knew and many which they did not. It also made them acquainted with a little plot against the peace (and purse) of the high official whose wife the sleeping lady was supposed to be. It went on until about 3 a.m., when she moved, yawned, and remarked, " I declare, I must have had a doze ! everybody seems to be gone to bed. What time is it, gentlemen? " Then the two men lied, as they were bound to do, and she went off to her cabin quite happy, never to the end of the voyage having the least glimmering as to why the dowagers picked up their skirts and fled before her as from a plague ! She pro- bably attributed it to jealousy. How her plot against the high official fared no one ever dis- covered ; but Mrs B. would certainly not have been mesmerised again had she known the effect of hypnotism on a tongue which perhaps never spoke the truth, and the whole truth, on any other occasion. The rest of the voyage was uneventful enough. Immediately on landing Jack went up country to join his regiment at a small town with an unpro- nounceable name, which was suspected of being a hotbed of mutiny, and was therefore closely watched and guarded. Of course by this time, 1 861, the mutiny proper was over and the tcr- 20 Indian Service. rible punishment had been meted out. But so many officers had been killed, or sent home broken down in body and mind by the awful suffering they had witnessed and endured, that those who were left had to perform double duty. Guard and " sentry go " were incessant, and for months at a time the officers of the 88th thought themselves lucky if they got three clear hours in the twenty-four for necessary rest. Actual fight- ing would have been bliss compared with the long dark nights spent in creeping stealthily round from sentry to sentry, with the idea strongly developed in the mind that unseen eyes were watching, and that treacherous hands might be waiting to do murder at any moment! Now Jack Jebb was a broad-shouldered active youth who had never known fear in his life (though once afterwards he made acquaintance with it when out driving with a talkative friend in the Rocky Mountains, who would gesticulate wildly with the reins in her hands, while the hind wheel of the dog-cart was half over the precipice !). Still, a few months of sleeplessness, overwork, and anxiety in a hot climate reduced his nerves to such a state of irritability and irresponsibility that he always rather doubted whether he had not committed a murder during that time — or at least, justifiable homicide. The Eighth Commandment. 21 Going quietly into his tent one evening, he caught a native in the act of stealing a pistol. Of course the man should have been handed over to the authorities for punishment; but Jack preferred to settle the matter himself, and de- voted the whole of his Hindustanee, together with his very powerful fists, to instilling a knowledge of the eighth commandment into the thief. When he considered that he had accom- plished this, he gave the man a parting kick and sent him off. He then turned into bed, to medi- tate on the regulation which says, " On no ac- count shall an officer strike a native." After a wakeful hour or so, he was just drop- ping off to sleep, when he was roused in an instant by the uncanny sensation which most of us have experienced, of some unseen presence being in the room. He had sufficient self-control to open his eyes without moving in bed, and to his hor- ror he saw something long and black and shiny within half a yard of his face. He immediately jumped to the conclusion that the disturber of his slumbers must be a snake, and that his only chance lay in being able to draw the pistol from under his pillow, and fire, before the creature was upon him. He held his breath in the dead silence of the night, and groped noiselessly for his weapon, the stealthy movements mean- 22 Indian Service. while coming ever nearer. Directly his hand touched the pistol, he raised himself on his elbow and fired simultaneously. The shot was followed by a heavy groan, which certainly never issued from the throat of a snake ; and realising instantly that the object he' had seen must have been the long black arm of a native, Jack sprang up, pushed his feet into slippers, and was soon outside. The shot had roused a few weary sleepers, who were readily satisfied with the assurance that it was a false alarm, — for, to Jack's surprise, instead of a defunct na- tive, there was absolutely no sign of his mid- night visitor, though, to judge from his groans, the man must have been severely wounded. A further inspection, however, showed a large pool of blood just outside the tent, which testified to the fact that something had been there recently. Jack now felt pretty certain that his assailant was the native who had first tried to rob him, and who had now made a futile attempt to revenge himself for the pommelling he had received. Another moment's drowsiness, and in all probability this history would never have been written. As soon as he caught sight of the blood, Jack began to follow the trail, anxious both to make Mysterious Disappearance. 23 sure of the identity of his enemy and to discover if he was seriously hurt. The track was easily followed to the edge of the jungle, about half a mile distant; but to try to explore a jungle in the darkness of an Indian night, while lightly and tastefully clad in pyjamas and slippers, was a task to which even the depths of his anxiety did not seriously incline him. So he went back to his tent, feeling rather chilly, and narrowly escaping a bullet, from a sentry unaccustomed to see his officers taking constitutionals in the dead of night in that sort of attire. Of course next day Jack made inquiries about the suspected native, who turned out to be well known as a petty thief; but no one had seen him since the preceding afternoon. And strange to say, no one ever did see him ! Whether he was exhausted by loss of blood and exertion in running so fast and far, and crawled into the jungle to die; whether in his wounded condition he was set upon by wild beasts and killed ; or whether, thinking the camp an unhealthy place, he simply decided not to return to it, — are things which no man knows. And his family said it was a pity; but of course he was a bad man, and would the sahib give them rupees? which, naturally, the sahib did. 24 Indian Service. There is little that is interesting to be told of the rest of Jack Jebb's life in India. He spent three years there — dreary years, when fever and overwork alternated with each other, and the only scraps of enjoyment to be got out of existence were occasional shooting-parties, where he first tasted the delight of bagging " big game." He had shot ever since he knew which was the kill- ing end of a gun, so he was not far behind even the old hands, and secured several good heads and skins in the course of these expeditions. But eventually these delights were put a stop to by repeated attacks of fever developing what is eu- phoniously called " hobnailed liver," whereby he was so pulled down that the doctor insisted on his going to the hills at once. Leave for him meant extra work for the others, so for some time he refused to apply for it; but when it became evident that he could no longer fulfil his duty if he stayed, he at last consented to go. It happened that at the station from which he was to start there ruled a native station-master, who, though never actively engaged in the mutiny, was strongly suspected of having done a good deal in a quiet way towards keeping it going in his locality. Nothing definite could be proved against him. Still it was quite certain that this A Recalcitrant Invalid. 25 official loathed the English and never missed an opportunity of covertly insulting any sick officer leaving from his depot for the hills ; while, in view of the tremendous " race " feeling engendered by the mutiny, the regulations most stringently forbade any Englishman, no matter what the pro- vocation, to take the law into his own hands in the chastisement of a native. Jack, of course, knew the man's reputation, and consequently was prepared to stand some " cheek" from him. By clinging to his post long after he was unfit to do his work, the invalid was so reduced that he had to be carried to the station in a litter, and doubtless he looked so ill that this native bully thought him a perfectly safe victim. Accordingly he began to make unpleasant remarks about the sick officer to his subordinates, speaking in a voice intended to reach the ear of the sufferer as he lay in his litter waiting for the train to be sig- nalled. Jack set his teeth hard and besought his gods to lend him patience. As he made no sign, the station-master felt quite secure, and ventured a little further than he had ever gone before — just a shade too far for his own health ; for rage giving him back his lost strength, Jack sprang from the litter and "went for" the surprised native in a thoroughly practical, scientific manner. Every blow was followed by a corresponding 26 Indian Service. bulge on the station-master's fat body, as he doubled up on all-fours and abjectly entreated the sahib not to kill him ! The sahib graciously consented not to do so, especially as he felt on the verge of fainting him- self. So he gave the man leave to get up, and crawled back to his litter more dead than alive, but with the joy of a virtuous action animating his soul. The station-master began to collect his own remains, wondering meanwhile how to be revenged. He soon thought of a plan, and going over to the litter, informed his enemy that he would not be allowed to proceed by the train then due, but would be sent to the station-house, there to await his trial next day for assaulting a native. Now Jack was anxious to get off to the hills, and felt, moreover, that the native had had the worst of it so far ; so he offered him Rs. 20 as a salve for his bruises, if he would say no more about the matter, and keep a civil tongue in his head for the future. " I will take Rs. 200 and not an anna less," said the man. " Then you may go and be hanged," replied Jack, " for you won't get it from me." Well, the police arrived, and, sure enough, he was marched off to durance vile. Now it may be imagined that a night in a close, hot cell, /// Court. 27 with no sort of refreshment for his body, and a cheerful prospect of being " broke " occupying his mind, had anything but a good effect on the health and appearance of a man already down with fever. So it came about that when he was carried into court next morning, the presiding magis- trate smiled visibly on being told that it was the emaciated invalid in the litter who had over- night produced the awful wreck of humanity to be seen in the witness-box. For in order to produce a better effect, the station-master had allowed the blood to dry on his cheeks, and with one eye closed and dirty scraps of sticking- plaster artistically arranged over the other, he looked a very ill-used native indeed. He said, and had twenty witnesses to prove, that the sahib had flown at him like a tiger while he was simply doing his duty and trying to make his passengers comfortable, and that, not content with nearly shaking the breath out of his body, he had deprived him of his eyesight, as my lord, the judge, could see. The judge listened to this moving tale, and he also listened to the witnesses. Then he heard what Jack had to say for himself, and also some details added by several Europeans who knew. 28 Indian Service. Then he said, " You can pay this native Rs. 5 for a doctor's bill, also you can pay costs, and then I should recommend you to take the next train for the hills." Jack fully expected to have to pay about Rs. 500 and get cashiered into the bargain, so his joy on hearing these words of wisdom may be imagined. As for the station- master ! He had refused Rs. 20 down in the hope of getting 200, and now he was to have Rs. 5 and his enemy was to go free ! He went home, washed off his war-paint, and made him- self look like a human being again, the while he talked to himself softly and fluently. He ceased to talk aloud, though, from that day forth, and never again insulted an invalid officer. It didn't seem so safe as he had thought ! Jack Jebb got to the hills at last, picked up health and strength rapidly, and was soon ready for duty again. But the oddest part of the story is, that years afterwards in Honduras he met a stray Englishman, who in the course of conver- sation began to tell him the foregoing story, but stopped abruptly when he saw his companion shaking with laughter. "Why, have you heard it before? " he asked. " I am the man ! " was the reply. CHAPTER III. BUSINESS DISASTERS. RE-MARRIAGE OF REV. MR JEBB — JACK JEBB RETURNS TO ENGLAND — COMPLICATED BUSINESS AFFAIRS — RESIGNS HIS COMMISSION — AT OXFORD UNIVERSITY — SOCIETY, ATHLETICS, AND READING — AN ODD APPARITION — GOES ON A SHOOTING TOUR TO SKYE — A COMFORTABLE IN- COME DETERMINES TO SPECULATE A PARTNER IN A GLASGOW STEEL GUN-BARREL FACTORY — AN UNFORTU- NATE STRIKE — £23,000 LOST IN A YEAR — BELATED GOV- ERNMENT ORDERS — CHAFING UNDER INACTION AN EXPEDITION TO NICARAGUA — EXPERIENCES OF A TROPI- CAL CLIMATE AN ADVENTURE IN GUATEMALA — HOME AGAIN OVEREND & GURNEY's INSOLVENCY — DEPRIVED OF HIS REMAINING FORTUNE — EMPLOYMENT A NECESSITY — LEARNS SHEEP-FARMING. To return from Honduras to India, nothing in- teresting enough to write about occurred to Mr Jcbb for some time after his return convalescent from the hills. But something of great impor- tance to him was taking place at home — namely, his father's re-marriage. It was a suitable mar- riage enough, and nothing was more likely than that a man in the Rev. Mr Jebb's position — virtually bereft of wife and son, and in bad health — would contract a second marriage, if only for the sake of mitigating his loneliness. 3