Rev. Lewis H. Smith.
Earnest Pleas
■TO
Married and Single People:
by-
REV. L. H. SMITH,
▲ member of the macon avnttai, conference of the african
methodist episcopal church.
NARHVILJ.K, TENN.J
A. M. *. SUNDAY SCHOOL UNION PUBLISHING HOUSS.
1891.
CONTENTS.
pagkes.
Dedication 4
Preface by the Authob .. 6-6
Introduction by Bishop W.J.Gaines, D. D... 7-8
CHAPTER I.
Who Should Marry, When and Why?. 9-16
CHAPTER II.
Duty of the Husband Toward his Wife... 17-24
CHAPTER III.
Duty of the Wife Toward her Husband... 25-29
CHAPTER IV.
Duties of Parents Toward their Children... 30-42
CHAPTER Y.
Special Address—The Work of Training
Children 43-55
CHAPTER VI.
Duty of Children Toward their Parents... 56-64
DEDICATION t
To Mothers, Fathers, Daughters and Sons—Hus¬
bands and Wives—and to the memory of my dear
mother, Mrs. Ann Smith, who was born in or near
Richmond, Ya.; lived there a slave, and married at
twenty-one years of age; sold in Richmond, from
her husband and relatives when tier first born, a son,
was only a few months old; brought to Georgia
(Macon) by a slave speculator, in 1848; sold in
Macon to a Mr. Charles Smith, of Talbot County, Ga.,
who, as his property, held her until 1865. To
my mother who, in common with slave life, married
my father; they both knowing that, as slaves, her
former husband was dead to her. To my mother who,
during her life of slavery in Georgia, was blessed of
God to be the mother of four other sons, and three
daughters, and saw seven of her children marry at a
proper age in Georgia, and the eighth in Texas, a few
years prior to her death. To my mother who, thank
God, first taught me how to pray and to love Jesus.
To ~ny mother who departed this life triumphantly in
the Christian faith at Belden, Texas, December 24th,
ISStt. Yea, to my mother who is waiting to welcome
me and mine, and all of hers to the Home of the
King of Glory. Amen.
Author.
AUTHOR'S PREFACE.
Thirty-two years the author has been a lover and,
as best he could, a follower of the meek and lowly
Saviour—beginning at the age of six. He was for
seven years a Sunday-school teacher, superintendent of
Sunday-school, member of the board of stewards and
leader, exhorter and local preacher. Fourteen years
he was pastor of mission, circuits and stations, and for
two years presiding elder.
The above is not egotism, far from it, but historical
facts; and the author only refers to them that the
reader may know he has had time, cause and some op¬
portunity to think and study closely and prayerfully
the matter contained in the five chapters composing
this little book. He has not written to show that he is
learned—that would be a failure to begin with—but
he has written, because he has felt and seen the great
need of such a work—a wrork confined to five subjects
alone, and there are no better or more important
subjects known to the race of mankind on earth.
A work containing instruction, from a Bibical stand¬
point, under the five heads, are alike important to
6
author's preface.
every husband, mother, wife, father, daughter and
son. Read it, not on account of the author's apparent
good record or history of himself, or to measure the-
depth of his literary attainments, but read it for the
sake of its truth, simplicity and deep earnestness, all
of which will be seen by the patient and careful
reader of each subject treated in this book.
The author understands that "of making books-
there is no end,'1 and that his will add another to the-
already innumerable number. In the face of this
very fact, he sends his out on the wings of faith and
hope, believing it will do its careful readers a thou¬
sand times more good than the small sum they pay
for it will benefit him or his.
May each reader be divinely guided in the way of
peace, truth and life eternal is the earnest prayer of
the author.
L. H. Smith.
INTRODUCTION.
The great question before tjie world to-day is what
is generally known as the Negro problem. It is being
solved by the educated and aspiring men of our
race. Nothing will do so much to elevate any race as
the proper training of the families that make up that
race. This subject can not be discussed too fully by
teachers and preachers. And for this reason I wel¬
come the appearance of the volume, " Earnest Pleas
to Married and Single People," by Rev. Lewis H.
Smith, pastor of Cotton Avenue A M. E. Church,
Macon, Ga. In view of the exemplary life, studious
qualities and general advancement of the writer, I am
sure that he is fully competent for the work he has
undertaken. The five subjects that he has treated are
full of interest and will benefit the readers.
Knowledge of right living among married and
single people may be defined as the rules of the best
society. These rules have been the outgrowth of re¬
ligion and civilization. The principles of married
and single people's duties in life are most powerful
8
introduction.
agents for promoting peace and good will among
families. The good influence of the best families or
single people are of great importance lo the welfare of
the nation. May "Earnest Pleas to Married and
Single People" be more powerfully felt among the
nations of the earth, than Rev. Lewis H. Smith ean
imagine in his brightest hopes for the success of this
valuable work. I believe the book will help to make
the rules of social life more agreeable arid facilitate
Christian hospitalities, and all members of society will
hold them binding and faithfully.
Therefore, I commend this volume to the race as
one that is an answer to one of the greatest demands
of our people, hoping that all may receive it with an
interest that is commensurate with its high value.
With high regard for the author and great anxiety
for the highest social development of the race, I am
Fraternally Yours,
W. J. Gaines.
CHAPTER I.
WHO SHOULD MARRY, WHEN AND WHY?
Many unmarried persons have not a right concep¬
tion of the true force of this solemn declaration of God,
viz: li My thoughts are not your thoi^hts, neither aje
your ways my ways." " For as the heavens are
higher than.the earth, so are my ways higher than
your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts."
God wills the peace and happiness of all the peoples
or nations of this world. Hence, b}T careful study of
His word, we can fully understand, (a) who should
marry, (b) when persons should marry and, (c) why
they should marry.
The Bible is the most wonderfully instructive, in
those things or ways which are wholly right, of
all other books. It tells of a future eternal and heav¬
enly home which our blessed Lord has prepared for
us—especially for* those who love and keep his com¬
mandments ; it shows to us a plumbline—God's way
by which He would have all mankind go, act and
live during mortal life.
The wrong doings of peoples and nations have
10
EARNEST PLEAS.
caused many to wander from God's laws, and
they have established all kinds of customs for
themselves. In their darkness from the light of God's
law, they have judged their deeds and ways to be
right, when, in truth, they were wholly wrong.
Hence, they have added shame to their shame,
misery to their misery and death to their death. But
God's law, showing who should marry, when and
why they should marry, has not bten, neither can it
ever be, destroyed.
The Bible, as said above, is wonderfully instructive;
for, in addition to God's true and high way for us all
to go, act and live, it tells us plainly of our proneness
to wander therefrom ; it tells of the bad results which
follow and overtake us while going our own way; it
also tells of the many blessings which follow and
overtake all who walk, act and live in the ways which
are His. Therefore, the Lord baith to the disobedient
ones : " My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither
are your ways my ways," etc. God loveb us and wants
us to be happy while we live in this world, and eter¬
nally happy in His kingdom above. Therefore, the
threefold question : u Who should marry, when and
why?" is of too great importance to the children of
men, and is too near the very foundation of our
WHO SHOULD MARRY.
11
peace, joy and happiness for our Heavenly Father not
to give to us, in His revealed will and way, the neces¬
sary answers to it. The scripture which is referred
to in the remainder of this chapter will show that He
has answered quite plainly and fully.
Gen. 2:18.—"And the Lord God said: It is not
good that the man should be alone: I will make
him a helpmeet for him."
Note carefully the words "man" "not good to be
alone" and "an helpmeet for him," then you will per¬
ceive that God's way and rule is: He who attempts
to marry must himself (1) be a m-oi; (2) he must be
an unmarried man—so considered by the law of God and
the laws of his country; and (3) it is not good for such a
man to be alone. So God has provided ua helpmeet
for him, and he must find her by His aid.
Gen. ii: 24.—" Therefore shall a man leave his
father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife:
and they shall be one flesh." This shows plainly that
it is not good for him to leave his father and mother
to be joined unto a wife before he is a man. Many
young men and maidens are apt to think that they
themselves know best as to when they should marry
and to whom they should be married, without duly
considering the advice of their parents, which is in ac-
12
EARNEST PLEAS.
■cordance with God's ways. Hence, there are thousands
who have learned, when it wras far too lat£, that their
troubles were, ten to one, more than they would have
heen, had not they persisted in ignoring God's way
and the instructions of mothers and fathers. It is
not good for persons to marry when their knowl¬
edge of the country in which they live—their knowl¬
edge of its laws and requirements—is very imperfect;
when their understandings relative to their duties to¬
ward each other as husband and wife are, by far,
more childish than otherwise. Such persons are chil¬
dren in more than one sense of the word, and, during
their subsequent life, will have to suffer many, many
regrets on the account of their childish and, perhaps,
presumptuous error, namely; the rushing of them¬
selves into the duties and responsibilities of man and
woman without due preparation.
1 Cor. vii: 2.—" Nevertheless, to avoid fornication,
let every man have his own wife, and let every woman
have her own husband.1' In these wrords we have the
two—the man and the woman—who should marry and,
as we have said, not the boy and the girl. The man and
the woman must marry, because as man and woman
they love each other, and understanding their duties
and responsibilities sufficiently, are fully prepared to
WHO SHOULD MARRY.
13:
enter into and spend life together as husband and
wife. The thought and ways of boys and girls, young
men and maidens should be pure and godly during
their years of preparation for the duties of manhood
and womanhood, so that they may not be forced to
marry sooner than they should, to "avoid" the great
sin: " fornication." This fact, however, will be better
understood by reading carefully the chapter: " Duties
of Mothers and Fathers." When the preparation for the
life of wife and husband is sufficiently made, then the
man should seek and find the woman who is to be his-
wife, and they, "for better and for worse," (if worse-
should come) should be legally united for life—noth¬
ing less than this.
Prov. xviii: 22.—" Whoso findeth a wife findeth a.
good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord." Prov.
xxxi: 12.—" She shall do him good and not evil all the-
days of her life." The tenth verse, of the same chap¬
ter, says : " Who can find a virtuous woman ? for
her price is far above rubies." God helps a virtuous
man to find a virtuous woman and they, sooner or later,
meet each other, love and agree, marry and are pros¬
perous and happy. See chapters on " Duties of Hut-
bands " and " Duties of Wives."
But when should persons marry ? (2 Cor. vi: 14)—
14
EARNEST PLEAS.
"Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers:
for what fellowship has righteousness with unright¬
eousness ? and what communion hath light with dark¬
ness ?" This is God's way—God's rule—and all who
ignore it will find, when more or less in the midst of
Borrow and suffering, that they have made a mistake
which can never with honor and safety be changed.
It is, indeed, no small affair to be a husband or to be a
wife. If doctors, lawyers, farmers, preachers,- teachers,
etc., cannot rightly perform the duties of their posi¬
tions in life without due preparation, then it is
equally true that the man and woman may enter into
marriage life and rightly perform the duties thereof,
after their due preparation for the same.
Jesus said: (Matt. vi:33)—"But seek ye first the
kingdom of God, and His righteousness ; and all these
things shall be added unto you." This teaches us that
it is of much greater importance for us to first make
sure of getting into the kingdom of God (the kingdom
of peace* life, light, wisdom and righteousness) than it
is to think and fret about finding a wife or a hus¬
band. True, God wills that the unmarried man and
the unmarried woman should marry and live in peace
and love together, but all such need His help to find
and know each other. Therefore, those who obey,
WHO SHOULD MARRY.
15
and walk and live in the ways of His kingdom will be
eufficiently aided by Him, even in deciding as to who
the wife or the husband shall be. Thousands have
married without properly considering these things,
and that is why there have been, and are now, so
many unhappy homes; so many thousands of sepa¬
rated husbands and wives; so many thousands of
divorce cases; thousands and thousands of uncared for
children (see chapter on "Duties of Parents to their
Children "), and also, thousands of crimes, such as
have often taken, or caused to be taken, the life of
wife, children and husband.
But why should the man and the woman marry?
(a) Because it is God's command that they shall be
one—husband and wife—one in joy, pleasure and
prosperity; one in trouble, pain and adversity or
abject poverty. The good and the bad, more or less,
will come to both, the man and the woman, and with
the two who are true to each other, if prosperity and
joy comes to their home through their worthy efforts
or by proper inheritance, it will be all the more pleas¬
ing and joyful, because both will share alike-
Should suffering, affliction or poverty come, they
can bear it the better, because of their love and
sympathy which is made one on the part of those
whom God hath joined together.
16
EARNEST PLEAS.
(b) From the home of the loving and industrials
husband and wife, the church, society, community and
state receive their truest members and officers.
(c) The proper cultivation of gardens of all kind,
or whatever is made all the better through proper
attention, labor and care of mankind, show plainly
why the man and the womm should marry—that
they may properly care for and help each other.
SOLEMN APPEAL TO UNMARRIED READERS :
"Would you avoid the trouble, shame or death
which has been brought on many others through
their hasty, unadvis *d and very indiscreet marriages ?
Take heed then to the word of God, and also the godly
advice of mothers and fathers. Live an upright life
before God and man. Then He will give thee all. year
more than is strictly necessary for thine own peace
and pleasure in this world, and in the world which is
to come, He will give thee eternal life, peace and j >y
forever. If a wife or a husband be necessary for
thee, He knows all about it; and if you continue to
trust Him with the whole heart, He will in due time
guide you in the right way to find her or him
Therefore trust lirmly in God and keep His ways to
the end.
CHAPTER II.
DUTY OF THE HUSBAND TOWARD THE WIFE.
" But if any provide not for his own, and specially
for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith,
and is worse than an infidel."—(1 Tim. v : 8.) The
words, " if any provide not for his own, and specially
for those of his own house, show clearly that the
man—the husband—has a duty devolving upon him
which he must rightlv perform," and which, if he fails
to do "he has denied" that "faith" that gives true
husbands their best support in doing well their part,
"and is," therefore, "worse than an infidel"—worse
than he Avho "disbelieves the inspiration of the Scrip¬
ture or the divine institution of Christianity."
As has been said, a husband is not a boy, but a man
of proper age, and possesses knowledge and wisdom
enough to choose for himself a wife, that is, if he has
given due heed to the ways of God and, also the
advice of true mother and father. I mean by "true
mother and father," such as do their duty well and
wisely towards the children entrusted to their care.
(But see chapter on "Duties of Parents.") Husband,
18
EARNEST PLEAS.
is a man who wisely considered the duties of a mar¬
ried man before he earnestly sought to gain the affec¬
tion, hand and heart of the lady whom he wished for
his life time helpmeet, Having found her he strove
most honorably to convince her that he was wholly
worthy of her love and life-long companionship; and,
that his sole object in paying his attention to her was,
that he might be allowed by her, by her parents, the
law of God, the law of her country and the best rules
of human society (not societies' unnecessary and most
costly rules) to take her to himself in holy wedlock
as his wife, helpmeet or lifetime companion. When
this is done and some properly authorized person has
declared that the union is complete, he is then, in the
truest sense of the word, a " husband." A husband to
begin, now, most fittingly, the duties which devolves
on him, and which he must continue to do while he or
his wife lives on earth.
But what are the duties of such a husband ?
Answer: (a) He must begin at once with his whole
mind, heart and soul to comply wholly with the com¬
mand of God:—" Live joyfully with the wife whom
thou lovest—for that is thy portion in this life.'*
(Ec. ix: 9.) It needs but little or no effort, the part
of the newly-made husband, to live joyfully with the
DUTY OF THE HUSBAND.
19
"wife he loves a few months, or, perhaps a few
years; and he can during such a short time easily
■content himself that she is wholly his portion in
this life. But he must keep in his mind the fact that
such a holy union is too Christ-like for Satan, who is
the enemy of all that is truly good, and that he will use
«very possible means to force confusion and disunion
into the heart and home of the husband and wife,
it matters not what their condition in life may be.
(b) Therefore, "Let the husband render unto the
wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto
the husband." (1 Cor. vii: 3.) This Scripture plainly
means that the husband should ever keep an eye
single to his marriage vows, and that the wife should
do likewise; and that both together must perform the
duties of their marriage vows to the end of life.
But it is of the duty of the husband I now
speak, and it is to him the divine order is given,
namely : " Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and
running waters out of thine own well." (Prov. v:15.)
That is, the pure water of womanly affection and love
must be drawn by him from the pure mind and heart
of his own wife. If we fail to give due attention
and care to our cisterns, wells, springs, etc,, the water
will greatly diminish or soon stagnate and be unfit for
20
EARNEST PLEAS.
use. So, you see, that he who neglects his own
well and cistern* will nitually refuse to drink the
waters thereof. You see, also, that such a man him¬
self, and not his cistern and well, is to be blamed for
the awful condition of the once pure and bountiful
supply of water. What is true in the case'of the neg¬
lected or uncared for cistern and well, is also true in
the case of a wife's mind and heart, whose husband has
failed to honor, protect and properly care for her. He,
having failed to comfort and cherish her, finds, ere
long, that her mind and heart is without pure and
bountiful affection and love for him.
His own mind and heart is famishing, as it were,
for the want of true affection, and love will force him
to seek it elsewhere * but his own conscience will ever
remind him of the fact that he, through improper
care and neglect, has damaged his wife's affections and
love so that, like the uncared for cistern and well,
they are unfit for his use.
(c) But the husband must not thus treat or neglect
his wife. He must, through the mercy and love of
God, love her more and more (and show his love by
what, he does for God, her and his home) until the
cords that bind them as one are completely severed
by the hand of death.
"Rejoice with the wife of thy youth." (Pro v. v.• 18.)
DUTY OF THE HUSBAND.
21
This scripture teaches that age and the changes wrought
on the wife by the toils and labors of life should not
by any means cause the husband to conclude that she
is unworthy of his continued love, protection and care-
The man who continues to love, care for, and protect his
wife, only demonstrates the fact that he continues to
love and care for himself: "So ought men to love their
wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife
loveth himself." (Eph. v : 28.) It was, or it should have
been, the power of this love that forced him to leave his
father and his mother and to be joined for life unto his
own choice. Therefore, this love for his wife, as he
should love himself, must continue to control him and
her during their natural lives.
" Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter
against them." (Col. iii: 19.) St. Paul understood both
the power of love and the power of bitterness—the great
good one does and the great harm the other is capable
of doing. The husband must love his wife ; if she is
not all he would have her be, from a social and intel¬
lectual standpoint, it is still his duty to love her
comfort and cherish her, anyhow, for she is his and
he can only be hers. "Likewise,-ye husbands, dwell
with them according to knowledge, giving honour
unto the wives as unto the weaker vessel and as
being heirs together of the grace of life." (1 Peter iii: 7.)
22 EARNEST PLEAS.
She is his wife, therefore, he must live with Tier
and that, too, according to knowledge and not accord_
ing to bitterness and passion. It may be that the hus¬
band is forced, at times, to say as did the " wise man/7"
Solomon : " It is bitter to dwell in the wilderness, than
with a contentious and an angry woman." (Prov. xxi:
19.) But should the husband, during the contentious
and angry moments of his wife, manage by the grace
of God, to control his own passion and deal with his
weak and angry wife according to knowledge and wis¬
dom, the storm in his home will never be fierce enough
to force him out of it into the wilderness of sin, where he-
can justly say, "My wife is so contentious and passion¬
ate that I am, for that reason, compelled to come to and
abide in this wilderness." A mong the very first duties
of the husband is, that he erect in his home, an altar for
prayer and praise to God, and he and his wife should
use it continuously. If, in the face of all these duties-
which the true husband is well and wisely doing, the-
wife is fairly proved to be guilty of the great and
awful sin—fornication—it is the duty of that
husband, according to the law of God, his coun¬
try and the rules of good society, to put her away. She-
is unworthy of his honor, respect, love and care
" Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for
DUTY OF THE HUSBAND.
23
.fornication, and shall marry another, committeth
adultery." (Matt, xix : 9.) While it is the duty of the
husband to put his wife away from him, on the
account of this great sin against God and all that is
pure and good, yet, there will not be, or average, one
wife of a thousand husbands, of any people, who will
thus be, or have need to be put away wh :n or where
the hiisband and the wife begin rightly and, in God's
way, continue to perform their duties as they should
do. (See chapter on "Duty of the Wife Toward her
Husband.") But to-the husband I must say, it is your
duty to be a man—a man of virtue, knowledge, pa¬
tience, kindness, temperance, charity and godliness
these will enable you to do well your duties while on
earth you live, and secure to you an eternal home of peace
and joy in our Father's Kingdom above. It is well and
most fittingly said by an able gospel preacher that
every husband should be wholly prepared when death
comes for him, to go and live in the most glorious
kingdom of God forever. But that there would be
much room for the world to doubt his entrance into
God's Kingdom above, while his poor wife and, per¬
haps, children, too, are forced soon after his death, to
take their abode in some poor-house, because he, when
he could have done the deed or thing which would
24
EARNEST PLEAS.
have wholly prevented it, wilfully or ignorantly
refused to do so.
The writer truly believes that while it is the duty
of the husband to secure a home for his family and to
do all within his power for the peace and comfort of
that home while he lives, he should, at the same
time, so invest a part of his daily and yearly
income, that those whom he is forced to leave at
death—his wife and children—should be duly aided
therefrom. Therefore, one among the many good
things which the husband should do while he is healthy
and strong is: He should insure his life in some good
life insurance society; not that he should forget his
duty toward God, his family and his neighbor while
he lives, but that his wife and his children may be
cared for, and bless his name even though he be dead.
CHAPTER III.
DUTY OF THE WIFE TOWARDS HER HUSBAND.
A wife is a woman legally united unto a man in
holy wedlock, and they are in the true sense, hus¬
band and wife.
But her position as Avife and the duties rightly
devolving upon her are so very important that much
more is said of her and her wifely duties by the
inspired writers of the Bible than is said of the hus¬
band. (See "Duty of the Husband Toward shis Wife.")
Yet, both are plainly defined and can be understood.
The first duty of the wife is that she must rightly
appreciate the fact that their marriage or nuptial tie
means that they are bound together until one. or the
other, or both are dead : " For the woman which hath
a husband is bound by the law to her husband so
long as he liveth." (Rom. vii: 2.) Her place and
duty in the home is not by any means the place and
duty of a slave: therefore, when it is said; " Likewise,
ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that,
if any obey not the word, they also may without the
word be won by the conversation of the wives; while
26
EARNEST PLEAS.
they," the husbands, " behold your chaste conversa¬
tion coupled with fear" (IPet. iii : 1, 2. J We are
to understand this to be one of the special duties
of the wife, or those wives who, being themselves
Christians, are unfortunate to have for their life-
companions, unconverted husbands. There are some
women who, like King Ahab's wife, think they sh< >ul(l
rule with unsurpassed authority, not only all the
affairs of home, but all, or whatever may be the business
affairs of her husband. It is right that she should
know the business affairs of her husband and he
should do nothing that he would be ashamed for her
to know ; but it is not her duty to say to him without
due reason : u this or that shall or shall not be done.1T
" For the husband is the head of the wife, even as
Christ is the head of the Church. Therefore, ab the
Church is subject unto Christ so let the wives be to
their own husbands in every thing." I Eph. v : 23, 24.)
This, by no means however, implies that her
submission shall be that of a servant or slave to
him, but rather the submission of the loving and
trustful helpmeet or wife. It is her duty not to be
what is callt d a bad wife so that it can be truly said
of her: "It is better to dwell in a corner of the house¬
top, than with" (her) ua brawling woman in a wide
house," or " It is better to dwell in the wilderness
DUTY OF THE WIFE.
27
than with" (her) "a contenious and angry woman."
(Prov. xxi: 9, 19; or Prov. xxvii : 15.) A continual
dropping on a very rainy day and a contentious wo¬
man are alike." It is her duty to be good and true,
and not bad and untrue to him: "A virtuous woman
ie a crown to her husband; but she that maketh
ashamed is rottenness in his bones." (Prov. xii : 4) It
is her duty to help her husband in every way pos¬
sible to build up and make their home pleasant
and prosperous, and not to destroy faster than he
can possibly accumulate. In other words it is her
duty to be wise and not foolish : "Every wise woman
buildeth her house ; but a foolish plucketh it down
with her hands." (Prov. xiv: 1.) It is her duty to
show by her good works that she is indeed, a good
wife ; "She stretches out her hand to the poor ; yea,
she reaches forth her hand to the needy." "She
openeth her mouth with wisdom; and her tongue is
the law of kindness." "She looketh well to the ways
of her husband, and eateth not the bread of idleness "
(Prov, xxxi: 20, 26, 27.) While it is plainly the
duty of the wife to clo these things well and wisely,
yet, it is the duty of the husband to faithfully do his
part, and also to praise his wife for having done
hers so well. But should her husband fail to praise
28 EARNEST PLEAS.
her good and faithful deeds, it is still her duty to do
well and timely those things for the doing of which,
the angels in glory will vie with each other in prais¬
ing ner: A woman that feareth the Lord, she shall
he praised." (Prov. xxxi : 30.)
The fruit of her hands will be given to her and her
own works will greatly praise her. (See Prov. xxxi: 31.)
If the wife finds that she has made a mistake in
selecting a husband so that she now perceives, to her
sorrow, that she failed to obey the heavenly or divine
order: "Be ye not unevenly yoked together with
unbelievers" (2 Cor. vi: 14), it will still be her duty to
do good and trust but the firmer in God, from whom
her help cometh; for she, having made the mistake
in her hasty and, perhaps, unadvised selection, must,
very calmly, submit to the fact that uthe woman
which hath a husband is bound by the law to her hus¬
band as long as he liveth." Many such husbands
have been convinced and brought to the light and
knowledge of God's love through the chaste con¬
versations and otherwise heavenly conduct of the
wife who said in humble submission to her fate, uit
may be, after all that God has allowed our nuptial .tie
to he, that I might be an instrument, in His hand,
to save the soul of my husband.'" All such wives
tshuuld thus see their duty and by the grace of God
DUTY OF THE WIFE.
29
work to that end. A husband thus converted will
love and honor his wife a thousand times more after
than before such a conversion took place.
The wife, however, has the same rights that the-
husband has, and can depart from him for the same
reason that he can depart from her; bufy as long as
such a reason does not fairly appear—"Let not the
wife depart from her husband." (1 Cor. vii: 10.)
But to the wife, the writer would say, your duty
is such from beginning to end, that you cannot per¬
form it as you should without the friendship and aid
of Jesus—that strong friend who standeth closer by
to aid you than any other friend possibly can do—the
bestof husbands not excepted. It is jrour duty to see
to it tliat the heavenly fire continues to. burn upon the
altar of prayer and praise to God in your home ; ,'nxl
should your husband have faults, don't whisper them
to your neighbor, who will only rejoice and tell it
her next door neighbor, but take them to Jesus in
j>rayer, and with the tongue of love and kindness
tell your husband just what you perceive his faults to
be, when none but he, you and God can hear. More
might be said here, but I must now refer to whut is
said onuDuties of Mothers and Fathers Towards Their
Children," in the next chapter.
CHAPTER IV.
DUTIES OF PAKENTS TOWAKD CHILDREN.
The fathers and mothers, of whom this chapter spe¬
cially treats, are those husbands and wives who, having
rightly complied with the laws of God and the laws of
their country, are legitimately husbands and wives,
whose homes are blessed of God with one or more
children
It is, indeed, a great sin before heaven, against God
and against all that is right and good when persons vio¬
late the laws of God, the laws of their country or
the advice of parents and teachers, and thereby force
themselves into the position and relation of mother
and father in a way wholly illegitimate and hence
destructive to pure and virtuous life. But such can
never legitimately claim the sweet title ofu mother11 or
u father,'1 yet, they should not by any means add sin to
ein by neglecting their children or not doing a father's
and mother's part toward such helpess and innocent
ones —the great crime not being theirs, but their sinful
parents. But to illegitimate parents it is said that
very often as an exposure of their sin and guilt, chil-
DUTIES OF PARENTS.
81
dren are given, and the greater will be the punishment
of those (the illegitimate parents) who fail to do, as best
they can, their duty towards such children. To the true
or legitimate mother and father, their children, given in
the bonds of holy wedlock, can be nothing less than a
blessing from God: " And he lifted up his eyes, and saw
the women and the children, and said, Who are those
with thee ? And he said, The children which God hath
graciously given thy servant.'1 (Gen. xxxiii: 5.) " Lo !'
said David " Children are a heritage of the Lord.'" (Ps.
cxxvii:3.) " Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the
side of thine house; and thy children like olive plants
round about thy table." "Behold, thus shall the man
be blessed that feareth the Lord.11 (Ps. cxxviii: l>,4.)
Now, then, God has not only given the children to
their mothers and fathers, but He has also given them
rightful or parental authority over their children.
^ For I know him, that he will command his children
and his household after him. and they shall keep the
way of the Lord, to do justice and judgmeut; that the
Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he has
ypoken of him.11 ((-Jen. xviiitKK) In their parental
authority their duty toward their children is plainly
understood: u And that thou mayest tell in the ears of
thy son, and of thy son's son, what things I have done
32
EARNEST PLEAS.
—among them; that ye may know that I am the
Lord." (Ex. x: 2.) It is their duty to teach their chil¬
dren concerning their Heavenly Father, and the
things of this life which they (their children)
should or should not do; u And ye shall teach
them your children, speaking of them when thou
sittest in thine house, and when thou walketh by
the way, when thou lieth down, and when thou
riseth up." (Deut. xi: 19.) They must thus instruct
their children in order that their pure minds may be
early filled with the pure wavs an I thoughts of God.
" That they might set their hope in God, and not for¬
get the works of God, but keep his commandments.1*
(Ps. lxxviii : 7.) Hence, mothers and fathers are com¬
manded to "Train up a child their children in the
way he (they) should go and, it is truly baid | they)
" he will not depart from it." I Pr< >v. xxii: <j.) [On the
work of training children, see the following chapter}
It matters not what else mothers and fathers may do
for the good of their children, if there is not an altar
of prayer and praise to God the Father, Son, and Holy
Spirit erected in their home and properly used by
both mother and father, there will be a failure in their
attempt to train their children in the way they should
go. Fathers and mothers should correct their chil-
DUTIES OF PAKENTS.
3a
dren timely, and in tlie spirit of parental authorit}1-
and love.
(For further Scriptural information on parental duty
of correcting children, see author's special address in
the following chapter, which wras delivered before
the Sumner Literary Society at Augusta, Georgia,.
A. D. 1KS7.)
While it is plainly the duty of parents to»
provide for and to protect their children in every
right and honorable wTay, yet they do themselves, as
as wrell their children, a most dangerous wrong
wdien they indulge and protect them in what is
contrary to law and order. Here is an example:
Eli, the high priest of God, excepting his over¬
indulgence to his children, was one of the best
and purest of the rulers in Israel: This good old man,,
no doubt his wife too, allowed his children to do-
many little things which they should not have done
while they were boys. So they grew up writh the false-
and most dangerous idea fixed in their minds and
wicked hearts that it was highly right for them to do
whatever they pleased and in whatever way they
might choose.
Win n they grew up to manhood they disregarded
the rightful authority of their father; they disregarded
34
EARNEST PLEAS.
the laws of God, and the rights of the people whom
their father had faithfully served for many years;
and now in his very aged and feeble days he was com¬
pelled to rely upon their aid in doing service in the
Temple of the God of Israel for the highest good of the
people. Great were their crimes before God and in the
persence of the people; and there was none to correct
or reprove them of their wicked ways but their
father, Eli. He had allowed them to do as they had
chosen from their boyhood life, and now they,
being men, would pay no attention to his fatherly
and saintly advice. But the Lord himself took
the matter in hand to punish (a; Eli, their
father, for indulging and not correcting his chil¬
dren while there was hope for them, and I b | to punibh
his sons for doing those things which were bo highly
wrong and sinful.
I give here the Bible account of the dear old father
and his sons, in support of what I have said of them.
"Now the sons of Eli were sons of Belial; they
knew not the Lord." u And the priest's custom with
the people was, that, when any man offered sacrifice,
the priest's servant came, while the flesh was in seeth¬
ing, with a flesh-hook of three teeth in his hand:1'
" And he stuck it into the pan, or kettle, or caldron, or
DUTIES OF PARENTS.
35
pot; all that the flesh-hook brought up the priest took
for himself. So they did in Shiloh unto all the Israel¬
ites that came thither." " Also, before they burnt the
fat, the priest's servants came, and said to the man
that sacrificed, Give flesh to roast for the priest, for
he will not have sodden flesh of thee, but raw.'' " And
if any man said unto him, Let them not fail to burn
the fat presently, and then take as much as thy soul
desireth; then he would answer him, Nay; but thou
shalt give it me now : and if not, I will take it by force."
" Wherefore the sin of the young men was very great
before the Lord: for men abhorred the offering of the
Lord."
"Now Eli was very old, and heard all that his sons
did unto all Israel; And he said unto them, Why do
ye such things ? for I hear of your evil dealings by all
this people." " Nay, my sons; for it is no good report
that I hear. Ye make the Lord's people to transgress."
" If one man sin against another, the judge shall judge
him : but if a man sin against the Lord, who shall
entreat for him ? Notwithstanding they hearkened
not unto the voice of their father, because the Lord
would slay them." That is to say, their sins were so
great, and they were so determined to continue in
their own ways of wickedness that none but God
36
EARNEST PLEAS.
could convince them of their great wrongs, or measure-
out due punishment to them for their many crimes.
" And," to continue the Bible account of them, "there
caint* a man of God to Eli, and said unto him, Thus
saith the Lord, Did I plainly appear unto the house
of thy father, when they were in Egypt in Pharaoh's
house ? and did I choose him out of all the tribes of"
Israel to be my priest, to offer upon mine altar, to burn
incense, to wear an ephod before me? and did I give
unto the house of thy father all of the offerings made
by fire of the children of Israel ?'1 " Wherefore kick ye
at my sacrifice and at mine offering, which I have
commanded in my habitation; and honourest thy sons
above me, to make yourselves fat with the chiefest of
all the offerings of Israel my people ?" " Wherefore the
Lord G< >d of Israel saith, I said indeed that thy house*,
and the house of thy father, should walk before me for¬
ever : but now the Lord saith, Be it far from me ; for
them that honour me I will honour, and they that
despise me shall be lightly esteemed." "■ Behold, the
days come, that I will cut off thine arm, and the arm
of thy father's house, that there shall not be an old mart
in thine house.1' " And the man of thine, wrhom T
shall not cut off from mine altar, shall be to consume
thine eyes, and to grieve thine heart: and all the-
DUTIES OF PARENTS.
37
increase of thine house shall die in the flower of their
.age." "And this shall be a sign unto thee, that shall
come upon thy two sons, on Hophni and Phinehas;
in one day they shall die both of them."
Such is the sad, sad message which Eli, the over-
indulg.uit father received from the Lord. Tongue can-
mot express the great grief which was so heavy upon
"the mind and heart of this aged father; and yet, the
t>oys disregarded it all, and went on in their sin and
•evil doing. So God sends another messenger to Eli—
this time Samuel, a little child, who bears a much sadder
message to Eli, whose heart is already filled to over¬
flowing with sorrow unspeakable on account of the evil
■deeds of his sons. " And the Lord said to Samuel,
Behold, I will do a thing in Israel, at which both the ears
of every one that heareth it shall tingle." " In that day
I will perform against Eli all things which I have
.spoken concerning his house : when I begin I will also
make an end." " For I have told him that I will
judge his house forever for the iniquity which he
knoweth; because his sons made themselves vile, and
.he restrained them not."
As has been said, Eli, the father of the thoughtless,
wicked and over-indulged sons, was already over bur¬
dened with grief on their account, so he humbly sub-
38
EARNEST PLEAS.
mitted, and said to Samuel, " It is the Lord: let
him do what seemeth him good." His son's crimes-
were so great before God" that their father in sorrow
knew that there remained no forgiveness of God for
them—they had sinned away their day of grace. SO'
Eli waited with patience to receive of the Lord an over-
indulgent father's punishment, and also to know how
and what would be the great and inevitable punish¬
ment the Lord would measure out justly to his sons.
Consider, reader, and look well at this most sad and
astonishing picture : Here is Eli a father of sons, the-
high priest of God and the judge or ruler in Israel.
The sons are given to him of God that he might train,
them for the service of God, their own highest good,,
and the good of the people generally. See these two-
boys at home mostly now with an indulgent
mother. She gives or lets them have many things they
should not have, just to please them, and to hush
their crying; their indulgent mother imagines-
that they are too young or too " sweet" to be rightly
corrected, and their father comes in from his priestly
duties, and he thinks so, too. The two boys continue-
to have their own way and choice about matters
at home and wherever they go. They grow to man¬
hood and their deeds are so bad that their mother's-
DUTIES OF PARENTS.
89
heart is broken and she dies with grief and remorse.
These sons disregarded the lamentable fate of their
mother and continued to do as they pleased, commit¬
ting sin of every kind. Their father is now too old to
do the service alone as judge and high priest; he must
be aide ]. There are none to do so now but these two
sons, who are not fitted for the solemn duties, because
they have always had their own way, and their way
was by no means God's way. So they knew not the
God of Israel, although they entered the priestly office
to do His holy service. .See them now in the priestly
office doing as they choose; changing the long estab¬
lished rules of God, and committing every imaginable
sin in His Temple, Their father, Eli, is very
sorry that his boys are so bad, but his day of properly
correcting them has long since passed. So he can
only look his boys in their faces and say, " Sons, your
ways and deeds are too bad. Never mind; the Lord
will punish you for your crimes." But they had been
allowed by him and their mother to do as they desired
from childhood; hence, they could not see why they
should not have their own way even in the service of
God and in His holy Temple. God has an eye toward
them from their childhood days, and knows the cause
of these son's wickedness, as well as the effect of it.
40
EARNEST PLEA.S.
Therefore he Bends his messenger to tell Eli all
about it; to tell him that the (lay of great punishment
shall come on him on the account of his indulgence
toward his rebellious sons, and they (his sons) shall be
most severlv punished for their wickedness. See now
their predicted punishment as it comes now upon the
two sons, and then most heavily upon their father,
who is now ninety-eight years old", and with a heart
almost as sad as death. A war is declared against
Israel by their enemy, the Philistines; a battle is
fought and Israel is partially defeated. The two wicked
sons of Eli, having their own way about it, carry the
Ark of God out to the field of battle, whether it pleased
God or not. The great battle is fought and among the
dead on Israel's side, the two sons of Eli are found;
and the Ark of Gbd, Israel's strongest fort, when God
is with thein in battle, is taken away by their enemy,
the Philistines. See Eli, the aged man and nearly blind
"high priest and judge of Israel, sitting on a high seat
by the way, watching as best he can for tidings of the
battle; while there, trembling with fear for Israel, his
sons, and the Ark of God, a messenger, from the field
•of battle, runs into the city, tells the news of Israel's
•defeat, and the people are crying aloud with
great grief. Eli hears and asks the messenger:
DUTIES OF PARENTS.
41
" What is there done, my son ?" " And the messenger
answered and said, Israel is fled before the Philistines,
and there hath been also a great slaughter among the
people, and thy two sons also, Hophni and Phinehas,
are dead, and the Ark of God is taken." "And it
came to pass, when he made mention of the Ark of
God, that he (Eli) fell from off the seat backward by
the side of the gate, and his neck brake, and he died :
for he was an old man, and heavy."
This is, indeed, a most, sad truth, but, as the reader'
■can plainly see, it was all brought about on the
account of the mother and father who had failed to do
rightly their duty toward their children. There are
now, no doubt, thousands of fathers and mothers, as
well as children, brought to grief and death, similar to
that of Eli and his sons, because they failed, when
there was hope for their children, to train them well
and wisely in the way they should have gone. The
motherly, but senseless and very, very dangerous habit
of telling their children about " sweet-hearts," before
their children can say " mama" or " papa," or even
know who mama and papa are, has often been the evil
seed, sown by her, from which tree, having fully
grown, she, her husband, and many others, have been
forced through great sorrow to eat the most bitter fruit
42 EARNEST PLEAS.
until relieved by death. (But see Special Address
no Training Children in the Way They Should Go.">
CHAPTER V.
the work of training children.
To treat this subject properly, we would have to
consider when, where, how and by whom this work of
training is to be done.
When—The proper time to begin the work of train¬
ing them.
Where—The place or places to begin and carry on
the work.
Whom—The proper persons to begin and carry the
work on to needed completion.
How—The way and the means to do the work.
(a) The time to begin the work of training children
is when we first perceive that they can understand a
right act or thing from a wrong one, however young or
small the child may be.
(b) The home, the school house, and the churcf),
are the places where this most important work must
begin and be carried on to final completion.
(c) Mothers, fathers, guardians, school teachers and
ministers of the Gospel, are the persons to begin, carry
on and finish the work of training children in the
way they should go.
44
EARNEST PLEAS.
These, combined, and singular, should spare no
pains necessary to do well this important work. But,
they should know when to train, how and the way to
train children—so that children may never have the
slightest cause, through their imperfect training or
bad example, to mistake the true way they should go.
(d) The means used for their instruction or train¬
ing should be right and righteous : yea, they should be
rightly and righteously used. But we would consider
is quite an instrusion, if not an imposition, upon
your kindness and patience if we, in this paper, were
to attempt to show the true work of the ministers
of the Gospel and school teacher as it is, and should be,
connected with the work of parent and guardian in
training onr children in the way they should go.
The Bible declaration above referred to is true and
holy, and wherever properly carried out or complied
with by parents, guardians, school teachers and min¬
isters of the Gospel, the truth of it is most clearly and
happily seen.
There have been, and, perhaps, are now lamentable
failures on our part in this respect—failures on the
part of some parent and guardian ; failures on the
part of some teacher in the day and Sunday-school,
and failure on the part of some preacher or pastor.
SPECIAL ADDRESS.
45
The failures have caused many of the young, or chil¬
dren, to choose their own way, which has not failed to-
briug upon us much grief, sorrow and pain; andr
upon them shame, disgrace, ruin and death,
And, because this has been the fate of manv
7 r
high in the affairs of this world as well as upon
the lowly and more unfortumate, many have yielded
to the satanic suasion and said, in heart if not openly
" This declaration is surely one among the mistakes-
founr] in the Bible."
Be it distinctly remembered that is is not said in
the Bible "train the child in the way you desire or
would have him go "—But it says " train him (them)
in the way they should go." This language of
holy writ, implies that a good, true and holy way has
been plainly marked out by one who knew how and
also the way wherein our1 children should walk, act
and live.
Our children for their highest good, while young
and when they are old, must know and walk in the
way that an all-wise and merciful Father has plainly
and strictly directed and lined for them.
They must be properly taught and trained in this
way, and, this training and teaching must be done by
those who have the highest right as well as duty to do¬
it.
46
EAENEST PLEAS.
Those having that right, as I have said, are parents,
guardians, teachers, and pastors of the church oi
our Lord and Saviour. The work and duty oJ
parents and guardians comes first and continues
with the others to the end or final completion
of the work. But, as we cannot in this paper
speak of the work as it is or should be done
by these parties combined, we will, therefore, consider
or speak of the work and duties of parents and
guardians:
(1) When they should begin, and (2) how they
should carry on the work of training children—in the
way they should go.
We will show also some things we parents and
guardians should not do.
(a) It is the duty of parents and guardians, first of
all, to know and keep in their hearts and memory
the fact that the smallest child has in its mortal body
a soul that shall live forever in heaven or in mibery—
that soul will, soon or late, enable the child, unlike
the little beast, to understand right and wrong—right
from wrong.
Therefore, we parents and guardians should adhere
strictly to the following commands given ut> of God in
the holy Bible, namely:
SPECIAL ADDRESS,
47
"Train up a child in the way he should go, and
when he is old he will not depart from it." " For God
established a law in Jacob, and appointed a law in
Israel, which he commanded our fathers that they
should make them known to their children."
" And ye shall teach them, your children; speaking
of them, when thou sittest in thine house, and when
thou walkest by the way, when thou lieth down, and
when thou risest up."
Here He furnishes the reason why we should so
teach and train them, viz:
" That generations to come might know them, even
the children which should be born; who should arise
and declare them to their children:
"That they might set their hope in God, and not
forget the works of God, but keep His commandments
—and, might not be as their fathers, a stubborn and
rebellious generation ; a generation that set not their
heart aright, and whose spirit was not steadfast in
God."
Whatever else we parents and guardians may have
d'>ne that was right for the good of our children from
their earliest knowledge of good and bad. It is never¬
theless true that many of us are almost total failures
in performing the righteous duties at our homes as
48
EAKNEST PLEAS.
the Lord demands, and, as the present and future
good, peace and prosperity of children so much need.
(b) It is, indeed, the highest duty of fathers,
mothers and guardians to work, hope and look for the
time when their children, regardless of age and size,
will gladly receive the all-important truth—"Jesus
suffered, died, ro=e again and ascended to heaven for
me: therefore, I love Him far better than anything on
earth—I will follow and obey Him to the end of life—
on earth, and then go up to live with Him in
Heaven."
When these truths are thus clear in the heart and
mind of our children, their little souls are not dead in
them, neither are they sleeping over their best in¬
terest. But, they are awake and alive in the Lord
Jesus.
(c) Then they should be instructed by parents and
guardians to present themselves before the pastor and
members of the Lord's visible church for membership
—the church or flock of their (the parents) choice,
of course, unless the child through meekness and
the wisdom that comes from God, can convince us
that he is led by the Spirit of God, to unite, as a mem¬
ber and laborer writh some other church or flock of
Christ.
SPECIAL ADDRESS.
49
We will not have a great deal of trouble about
our children's choice of a church for membership, if we
are the ones that lead them to our dear Saviour,
through our own consistent Christian life and
character at home and at the church.
Be it remembered that our children when they thus
become Christians and members are not perfect—
neither are grown persons in all things perfect
when first admitted to the church—all must be helped
and trained in many things.
Therefore, our children, even though they be little
Christians, must still be taught, trained, and reproved
in the way they should go. It is said that a little girl
who was converted—made alive in the Lord Jesus—at
Mr. Talmage's church in Brooklyn, New York, asked
her mother, who was a member, to let her join the
same church. The mother objected, saying: 'lYnu
are too young and cannot keep the rules of the
church." The child insisted and by the aid of Dr.
Talmage, the mother agreed and the child was formally
admitted. The mother, howevef, holding still to her
own opinion—the child is too young for membership
—did not continue to teach and train the child as hhe
should have done, but she set herself to watch the
50
EARNEST PLEAS.
child's first wrong or sin, so as to have the child's
name taken from the church roll.
The poor child did well, for it was a whole month
before that mother found what she supposed to be
a good cause for which the child's name should be
taken off. That wrong and sin on the child's part,
was that she was tempted one day to tell a falsehood.
The mother, it is true, wras not glad that her child had
thus committed a sin, but she did feel that her asser¬
tion, that the child was too young to keep the
rules, was now sufficiently clear to go to Dr. Talmage
and demand that the child's name be quietly taken
from the book.
So the mother went to the pastor—leaving the child
a»t home, and told him all about it. " Well," said the
pastor, " Sister, your daughter has told afalshood and
for that, the first offence, you want her name taken off,
do you ?" " I do." said the mother.
" Sister," said the pastor, u how long have you been
a member of the church?"
" Seventeen years," said the mother. " How many
lies have you told in that time telling people you were
glad to see them when you were not; that you were
not at home when you were, and such like things ?"
The mother saw her mistake plain enough and
SPECIAL ADDRESS.
51
the child's name was not taken off. Yes, it is our
highest duty as parents and guardians to teach and
train our children to accept, love and follow the Lord
Jesus. Let them enter and live in Christ's church on
earth, for such have the right to enter and live forever
in His kingdom above. Have you ever thought how
much harm we can do our children by talking in their
presence and many times to them, about what we and
they suppose to be the faults and wrongs of our neigh¬
bors, their teachers and our preachers and pastors.
Children take in such things, to their everlasting
hurt, a thousand times faster than many of us sup¬
pose, and, while we in ten minutes, after having,
before our children, denounced and perhaps, belied our
innocent neighbors, teachers and preachers—can meet
them, take their hand and say, "I am so glad to
see you." Our children, not knowing how to act
the hypocrite, will disregard and refuse that help
which we so much need of them (our neighbor) in the
work of training our children in the way they should
go.
Many of us never call our children together around
a family altar, and there talk to them about u Our
Father who art in heaven 1,1—what He has done for
them and why he has done it. Also what He now
52
EARNEST PLEAS.
requires of them, and what He pays them now for
working, walking and living in the way they should
go. Also that He will reward us and them when life
ends with us here.
Many parents and guardians seldom, or perhaps,
never bow at home, in prayer and thanksgiving to
God, with their children. Having, in a conversa¬
tional way, impressed them that praying and turning
thanks to God is an essential and indispensable duty
in which they find great and inexpressible pleasure.
If we parents and guardians do our wThole duty at
home, our children will know good from evil, at home
and abroad. And they will turn from the evil or bad
as you or I will turn from what wTe know to be deadly
poison.
The father, mother or guardians who is ashamed or
neglects to talk to the little ones at home, about Je-sus
and Hi3 love for them, commits the sin of omission,
and the poor children are greatly damaged—for, when
the pastor or Sunday-school teacher tries at church to
impress such unfortunate ones, that the best thing for
them now and forever is to love and serve the
Lord Jesus; that they will love and serve mamma
and papa better if they love and serve Jesus as
they ought, they think, if they don't say it: " If
SPECIAL ADDRESS.
53
-this teaching was true, mamma and papa would say
more to us about it, and they would pray with and
for us more than they do."
But here are more, very important and necessary
■commands, given to us of God for the good and well
bring of our children, viz :
"Correct thy son while there is hope, and let not
thy soul spare for his crying." " Foolishness is bound
in the heart of the child; but the rod of correction
will drive it far from him."
" The rod and reproof give wisdom ; but a child left
to himself bringeth his mother to shame. "
''Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he
shall give delight unto thy soul. And ye fathers pro¬
voke not your children to wrath; but bring them up
in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.1'
"Fathers provoke not your children to anger,
lest they be discouraged.1'
Those of us who threaten and promise to use the
Tod in correcting and reproving our children and fail
to do so, or do it contrary to the rules given above,
lea\e open a broad way, and our children will make
choice of it, and bring upon themselves shame, ruin
and death; and upon parents that sorrow and pain
which shortly ends their own existence in this world.
54
EARNEST PLEAS.
To illustrate the carelessness and slackness of parents-
in this respect, it is said that two little boys were once
playing in the street before their mothers door. One
of the boy's name was Johnnie. Johnnie's mother
came to her door and said, "Come here Johnnie." He
paid no attention, while the other insisted that
Johnnie should go and know wThat his mother wanted.
Johnnie's mother called again and said, 41 Never
mind, Johnnie I will nettle you when you
come." Johnnie's play-mate was then very much
alarmed, because his mother never failed to la^h him
when she promised to so. So the little fellow said ta
Johnnie, " I will be sorry for you when your mother
gets hold of you." "0 play on,'' said Johnnie ushe
won't lash me, for she has been telling lies like that a
long time."
Such is the case with many of our children now—
they know how slack-twisted we are with them ; there¬
fore, they feel themselves righted or justified in attach¬
ing but little or, perhaps, no importance to our
parental authority.
Can we in view of the facts above referred to, come,
justly and righteously to any other conclusion than
this, viz :
The Bible declaration—" Train up a child in the
SPECIAL ADDRESS. 55
ft
way he should go, and when he is old he will not de¬
part from it"—is true and holy. And whatever
beems or appears to the contrary are, indeed, lamenta¬
ble failures on the part of those—one or the other—
whose duty it was to train, instruct, direct, reprove
and correct children in the way the Lord has directed
aiid would have them go.
Let parents and guardians, join at the proper time
and places with teacherb and preachers, and perform
rightly and righteously the work and duties justly de¬
volving upon them for the present and future well be¬
ing of our children. Then this Divine truth—"They
(he) will not depart from it1'—will no more appear as
a mistake in the Bible, but as one among the brightest
and most necessary parages of scripture to be found
in the Holy Bible.
CHAPTER VI.
DUTIES OF CHILDREN TOWARD THEIR PARENTS.
" There is a generation that curseth tlieir father
and doth not bless their mother.11 Prov. xxx: 11.
It may be that the sons and daughters who now
read this concluding chapter, have read carefully the
five preceding ones, especially that part which
points to the mistakes of mothers and fathers;
and, therefore, they may have concluded that
mothers and fathers are more to be blamed than chil¬
dren ; for the existence of the generation, at any time,
that curseth their fathers and dues not bless their
mothers But children must remember that while
such conclusion is very true in the primary sense of
the case (for which all parents who are guilty will
be severely purnished in this or the wt >rld which is to
come, as was Eli and the rich glutton referred to in
the Bible), yet they, if truly a part of those who
curseth their fathers and doth not bless their mothers,
can not hope, by any means, to escape the punish¬
ment and untimely death of the two bons of Eli, Hoph-
ni and Phinehas. Every son and daughter of this
DUTIES OF CHILDREN. 57
world should treasure up in his or her heart and mind
the truth from the mouth of God : " The soul that sin-
lieth,. it shall die. The son shall not bear the iniquity
-of the father, neither shall the father bear the iniquity
of the son: the righteousness of the righteous shall
be upon him, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be
upon him." (Ez. xviii: 20.) The question for sons
•and daughters to understand and properly answer
is not as much as (a) "what have your parents done
right or wrong; and what are they doing to-day that
is right or wrong?" as it is (b) ''what have we (I)
done right or wrong; and are we now (myself) doing
toward my mother and father as God has commanded
me to do? A proper answer to'the latter question
should be given by every son and daughter of the
human race, and especially us for whom God has
■done so much within the past thirty years. But let's
see from the Bible standpoint, what the duties of
children towards their parents are, as God would have
them do.
(1) HONOR THY FATHER AND THY MOTHER.
The very first duty of every child, which it should
perpetually perform while life to them is given, is,
namely : "Honor thy father and thy mother, that thy
days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy
58
earnest pleas.
God giveth thee." Or, put it in other Bible words:
"Honour thy father and thy mother as the Lord thy
God has commanded thee; that thy days may be
prolonged, and that it may go well with thee, in the
land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.11 (Deut, v:
16) It is the duty of children to honor their parents
in word, action, and deed, If their mothers and
fathers are not all they should be, children should
honor them : and if the parents are what they should
be, they should receive the honor due them. The
greatest benefits derived through the obeying of this
law of God are given to children. Therefore, they
should honor them every way, and in every place they
can, that their own days may be prolonged, and that
it may be well with them wherever they may be.
When that young man called on Jesus and asked
him what he should do to be saved, the Lord said to
him: " Thou knoweth the commandments, Do not
commit adultery : Do not kill: Do not steal: Do not
bear false witness : Honor thy father and thy mother."
Our Saviour intended to teach the children of every
race and generation, through the answer he gave that
young man, that the children or generation who were
guilty of adultery, killing, stealing or bearing false
witness, dishonored their parents, and for bo doing.
DUTIES OF CHILDREN.
59
their days to live on the earth would not be lonir
but very short. St. Paul showed the importance of
honoring parents when he wrote to the Ephesians
these words: " Honour thy father and thy mother:
which is the first commandment with promise; that
it may be well with thee, and thou mayeth live long
on the earth." (Eph. vi: 2, 3.) This commandment,
as St. Paul says, promises well doing and long life to
the children who continue to obey it while they live
on earth. Jesus, our Saviour assures us of its perpetual
or everlasting firmness when he said, "It is easier for
heaven and earth to pass, than one tittle of the law to
fail." (Luke xvi : 17.)
But children cannot honor their parents if they
will not hear and obey them: uMy son, hear the
instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of
thy m< )ther: for they shall be an ornament of grace unto
thy head, and chains about thy neck." (Prov. i: Sand
9.) Note well here, what follows the hearing of a
father's instruction and not forsaking the law of a
mother—the crown of great^ success for the child's
head and the chain of peace, love, knowedge, wisdom
and mercy for his neck, hands and feet. But think of
those children who will not hear nor obey their
parents. Instead of the shining, and the glorious
60
EARNEST PLEAS.
crowns of success in life for their heads, and peace,
love, knowledge, wisdom and mercy for their neeks,
hands, and feet, they have a black cap on the gallows,
and a death rope around their necks, or a shaven head
in prison and chains of iron around their hands and
feet—whose perpetual answer to their cries for mercy
is, " We know no mercy."
The blessings which are promised to obedient
children are further viewed from a Bible standpoint:
" When thou goeth, thy steps shall not be straitened ;
and when thou runneth, thou shall not stumble/'
(Prov. iv: 12.) It is often said of some boys and
girls, and some young men and maids, that they are
not worthy of trust, because they are what is called
" too fast" for their own good or to be trusted by
others in things or ways of any importance. But the
expression is never used in connection with the
children who properly honor their parents.
It is a duty which children owe their parents, that
they hear and take fast hold of instruction or good
advice. It matters not who oifers it to them : u Take
fast hold of instruction : let her (it) not go, keep her
(it), for she (instruction) is thy life.11 (Prov.iv: 13.)
There are children who think their mothers and
fathers are incapable of telling them anything that is
DUTIES OF CHILDREN.
61
worth hearing or knowing: but their parents see their
haughty and shameful mistakes a thousand times
better than such children can possibly see for them¬
selves.
Loving them as they do, not withstanding their
proud spirit toward them, as parents, they con¬
tinue to cry to them from the depth of their heart and
soul: " My son, attend to my words; incline thine
ear unto my -sayings." " Let them not depart from
thine eyes; keep them in the midst of thine heart."
" For they are life unto those that find them, and
health to all their flesh." (Prov. iv : 20, 21, 22.)
But hear the sweet and beseeching voice of a loving
mother to her son who cares but little for the wishes
and commands of his father—hear her: ''My son,,
keep thy father's commandment, and forsake not the
law of thy mother: bind them continually upon thine
heart, and tie them about thy neck." "When thou
goest, it shall lead thee; when thou sleepest, it shall
keep thee; and when thou awakest, it shall talk with
thee." (Prov. vi: 20, 21, 22.)
It is the duty of every son and daughter not
only to hear their parents instruction, but to hide, as
be^-t they can, their faults, not speaking of punishable
crimes, with their filial cloak of charity. It is truly
62
EARNEST PLEAS.
said that, " A wise son heareth his father's instruc¬
tion" and that, u A fool detspiseth his father's instruc¬
tion. " (Prov. xiii : 1; xv: 5.) Do not dishonor them.
Children cannot afford to dishonor their mothers and
fathers. Their punishment as seen from a Bible stand¬
point, is too great: u If a man have a stubborn and a
rebellious son, which will not obey the voice of his
father, or the voice of his mother, and that, when they
have chastened him, will not hearken unto them: then
shall his father and his mother lay hold on him and
bring him out unto the elders11 i the rulers I u of hib city,
and unto the gate of his place; And they bhall say
unto the elders of his city, this our son is stubborn
and rebellious, he will not obey our voice; he is a glut¬
ton, and a drunkard. And all the men of his city
shall stone him with stones, that he die.11 ^I)eut xxi :
18-21.) True, this was a law given to the Israelites;
but the same God who gave it to them lives to-day
and will see to it that children who do such things
in our day shall be duly punibhed for so d< ring,
DO NOT OFFEND MOTHER AND FATHER.
Children should ever keep in their minds the law
of God which forbids their giving or being the cause
of any oifence being given their parents by others.
Hear what God says about it: "He that smiteth his
DUTIES OF CHILDREN. 63
+
father, or his mother, shall surely be put to death."
u He that curseth his father or his mother shall
surely be putto death." (Ex. xxi: 15,17.) "Whoso
curseth his father, or his mother, his lamp shall be put
out in obscure darkness." (Prov. xx:20.)
This law of God needs no, or but little, comment.
It is plain and positive. And, if the punishment does
not come to children now who commit such crimes
against their parents as it did then, it will surely
come sooner or later in one form or another. For,
when children do such things against their parents,
they have gone far beyond the awful danger line, and
will not be permitted to recross it except through the
punishment due for their crime.
A QUESTION TO SONS AND DAUGHTERS.
What have you done, or what are you now doing
to assure your parents as well as those who know
you and 3'-our mother and father best, that your acts
toward them have been and ever shall be in accord¬
ance with the word of God which shows the duty of
children toward parents ? Remember that you can
not do your duty towards your parents as you should,
without the love of our Heavenly Father so freely
given to you through his Son, and, also, the aid of
His Holy Spirit, which he gives to those who love
and follow Jesus.
64
EAKNEST PLEAS.
Let every act toward your parents prove that if you
live in the midst of children who eurseth their father
and doth not bless their mother, you are, by no-
means, one of them. Therefore, trust firmly in God,
help and honor your parents in the way God
would have you do—then you will be prosperous and
happy in this world and eternally happy in heaven,
above.
THE END.