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32 X

EYE'S DAUGHTEES ;

OR,

COMMON SENSE

FOR

MAID, WIFE, AND MOTHER.

MARION HARLAND,

AUTHOR OP " OOMMOX SBNSB m THE HOCSBHO.B SKKIKS," BXC, ETC.

J<Lr?ha riSLKLt ;:^-:,^?l^^^^^^^ - the

TORONTO :

H3?

^ to <;^

TO MY SISTERS,

THE

WIVES, MOTHERS, AND DAUOHTERS OF AMERICA,

IS APFECTIONATELY AND EAENESTLY
DEIJICATEO.

wi-
Me
Clj
wo
hei

I
the
fro]
per
Bu^
ope
intc
sex,

thin
holi
ing
nev(
cent

INTRODUOTIOIS".

When, almost two years ago, I was importuned to
wiite a series of popular articles upon the "Physical and
Mental Education of Woman," I re-read carefully Dr
Clarke's « Sex in Education," and said in effect, if not in
words, "They have Moses and the prophets. Let them
hear them."

Still, the proposition had awakened my attention to
the real or imaginary need for such a work. It was one
from which my taste recoiled, nor had I— it was ea. fi
persuade myself— time or strength for the undertaking.
But, once admitted, the thought would not down. Once
opened, my eyes saw more and farther than ever before
into the needs, the failures, and the capabilities of my
sex.

I saw a mighty class of human beings ignorant of the
things pertaining to their physical peace ; accounting the
holiest mysteries of their natures an unclean thing ; hold-
ing carelessly the sublimest possibilities of their kind ;
never giving a thought to the awful truth that they
control the fate of the coming race.

Vlll

INTRODUCTION.

I saw Man,~owning Woman as his mate with but
one, and that the least noble side of his dual nature —
the conscious oppression of her by the coarse and sensual
the repression of her intellectual strivings by the arrogant
who brook not even the shadow of a partner on the
throne of Self. With pain and surprise I saw the uncon-
scious tyranny of the refined and chivalrous. The velvet
glove needs no iron hand within to keep Woman-the
flattered Angel of Home and Queen of Hearts-in her
place. To the boor, she is a kitchen pipkin, valued
accordmg to the amount of hard usage she will endure
the quantity of work to be gotten out of her. To the
boor's superior in sense and breeding, she is delicate
faience, to be treasured in a windowed cabinet very
precious, very expensive, and, for the practical business
of life, very useless.

I saw that the influence of traditions,— some mouldy
and unsavoury, others sweet as the breath from the Indian
jars our grandmothers kept filled with spiced rose-leaves,
—held all these wrongs to their work. Public sentiment
has decreed what shaU be whispered in secret and what
proclaimed from the market-tower. Old- wives* fables and
prejudices outrank with the majority of women the testi-
mony of enlightened physiologists. The girl walks blind-
folded between ploughshares, hotter and closer together
than Queen Emma's, and can hardly— unless by a mirac'e
of mercy— fail to sear her tender feet.

Yet, brave men and braver women had already spoken.
It was meet that these latter should be heard. Women

INTRODUCTION.

can say things to women which we would not bear from
men,— things which men do not know. There is with
us a Guild of Sentiment with which a stranger may not
intermeddle, as there is a Guild of Suffering known in
its fulness of bitterness only to the initiated. The
drawback to a woman's advocacy of any cause is that
her idealistic, sympathetic, maternal nature makes her a
partisan. Her subject becomes her bantling. She is
restive in argument. Her " can't you see it ? " anticipates
logical deduction. Woman is an instinctive diagnosian.
Man is patient and systematic in following the clue lead-
ing to the source of a malady, and in adopting the
successive stages that promise cure. He, in his turn, is
irritated by the inconsequence of readers of the other
sex ; tenacious of technicalities dear to the scientific soul,
loses strength of style when he) tries to simplify his
treatise to their comprehension.

I have not the vanity to believe that I can convince
the educated reason whi S Clarke and Greg, Napheysand
Mitchell. Frances Powe <;obbe and Mary Putnam Jacobi
have not moved.

And yet, my book is written ! After the firet page I
could not stay heart or pen. I send it forth to homes
where other " Familiar Talks " from the same source have
found, first indulgent, then loving auditors. I have
aimed to avoid abstruseness on one hand, and baldness
on the other. I hope there is not a sentence which
mother and daughter may not read together. I know

INTRODUCTION.

Sessional, yet i! „te ^U rr''"" '^ ""'" P™"
beingpe^itted to di.t.S e ,0^1 oT ^ TA"'
gamed to those who n,,v nnt I., '"^'"' """^

of aceesa to the store-hll "'°^''' '"^ ^""'^t-

Makion Hariand.

CONTENTS.

Introduction,

page

CHAPTER I.

Birth— Not Beoinnino,

CHAPTER II.
Infants' Food,

.. 13
21

CHAPTER III.
"Starting Even,"

CHAPTER IV.
Handicapped,

.. 36

.. 47

CHAPTER W
Reterence op Sex,

CHAPTER VI.
The First Starting-Point,

.. 61
.. 76

CHAPTER VII.
Girlhood,

CHAPTER VIII.
Brain- Work and Brain-Food,

.. 91

.. 104

CHAPTER IX.
What Shall .Our Girl Study?

.. 117

CHAPTER X.
Face to Face with Our Girl,

.. 131

CHAPTER XI.
How Shall Our Girl Study ?

.. 146

CHAPTER- XII.
The Rhythmic Check,

.. 161

■^" ' CONTENTS.

CHAPTER XIII. \ ' ^^°^

American Worry,

CHAPTER XIV.

What Thkn ? ... ,-^

• • • ■ . . 185

CHAPTER XV.
Called,

' .. .. 199

CHAPTER XVI.
What Shall Be Done With the Mothers ? . . .215

CHAPTER XVII.
Indian Summer, 224

CHAPTER XVIII.

Housekeeping and Home-Making, .. .. _ £35

CHAPTER XIX.
Dress,

' 250

CHAPTER XX.
Gossip,

' 267

CHAPTER XXI.

Prince Charming,

' 283

CHAPTER XXII.

Married,

' 296

CHAPTER XXIII.

Shall Baby Be ? . . , _..

CHAPTER XXIV.

^"^^^«' 317

iS?

> • • •

I CHAPTER I.

BIRTH— NOT Bt,.iNNING.
\^!¥°'^j^^ physically, as weU as metaphysically, a thin" of shreds and

_ The baby-girl is bom. There are yet homes where
the announcement of her sex excites discontent

"The father of ten sons is rich. The father of ten
laughters may as well engage rooms in the poor-house
tit once, says the old proverb.

5 Nor is this all for idle talk sake ; the prating of an ob-
isolete prejudice. I shall not soon forget the Sial repuo--
inance expressed in the face of the little girl whom I con-
■gratulated awhile ago upon the advent of the month-
old baby lying on the mother's knees. The mite of an
Blder sister, but two-and-half years of age, looked at the
new-comer as if it had been a toad or a snail

It s nuffin but a girl-baby ! It ought to be divoivnded ! "
phe uttered, slowly and disgustfully

.nf J!f ^f ^l ^f^""^-^' ^''' *" ""^y '^ ■ " interposed the
1 Wl ? t/."f°g her pale face, a sigh mingling

It an ti ^^ ; J- ^''^ ^" ^°"^^^^'^' ^'^' ^he child take! .
It all in earnest. It is natural, you know, for men to want

.ii"/f * ^^ ^^ *^® daughter who makes the home ' " was
ttll 1 dared say. ' " '^

BnThfJ'"-^''^^^"^i'^'n,^°^J"S^*«^ from the beginning
f u the passive voice ? To be supported, to be protected.

BIRTH — NOT BEQINNINO.

to be dowered— at the best to be loved. The coarse re-
alism of the Chinese father only accentuates the petulant
jest of the American and presumably Christian husband
into the finale—" To be drowned."

We— as the essential condition of the continuation of
our subject— will give our new-born daughter the advan-
tage at the outset of assuming that she is tolerated and
passably welcome in the home into whose warm snugness
she has fallen. Perhaps, by reason of a precession of
several living sons, her advent is hailed with pleasure,
bhe IS " a perfect child," too, and pronounced a " remark-
ably fine infant " by doctor and nurse.

The conscientious quiet that hedges about " a comfort-
able confinement " is peculiarly conducive to day dream-
ing. The painless rest would, of itself, be almost com-
pensation to the whilom busy woman for months of suf-
lering overpast, had the mother won nothing besides her
own life by the already forgotten anguish.

"Baby is a world of company to me," she says, when
condoled with upon enforced solitude and inaction. " The
time passes fast and delightfully. She knows and under-
stands me already."

She must indeed be hopelessly prosaic and inane who
does not bring out from the calm, white tent of that still
month a juster appreciation of the dignity of maternity ;
patience and resolve for the performance of Life's duties',
and a deeper thankfulness for home-loves and happiness!
Baby, meanwhile, has oflTered many practical suggestions
tor the consideration of her companion. It is not singu-
lar—muses the mother—that she should already display
certain tendencies, entirely selfish, which are usually re-
garded as insept able from human and animal nature.
But that she should, in the short space of four weeks,
have contracted habits, is a puzzle that has in it the ele-
noents of alarm. The monthly nurse whose dominion in
the household is adjudged by Civilization and so-called
iiuxury, to be altogether indispensable in the " circum-

BlRTlt— NOT BEGINNING.

stances -call her seton, blister, leech, or what you will
—has done her professional best to keep herself comfort-
able and spoil her helpless charge, during her brief auto-
cracy. She has walked and rocked her to sleep in her
arms secretly, if not allowed to do it openly ; fed her at
all sorts of irregular intervals; pinned the swaddlincr.
bands as tightly as her sinewy fingers could draw them •
administered catnip, Dewees' Mixture, Mrs. Winslow's
boothing Syrup and other invaluables that mother and
child (with no thought of the disinterested Gamp) might
have a good night's sleep,-until the tiny morsel that has
survived the gall-moon immediately succeeding birth is
hardly the same gift which was laid, in the first hour of
conscious existence, in the mother's arms

Gamp feeds Baby with the fussy assiduity of a child
ii ling the ever-wide month of a callow robin, and with
httlen,ore judgment. She pours down sweet oil thick
with sugar as a provisional purgative; toast-water like-
wise syrupy to prevent bowel-complaint ; « cambric tea "
—still SAveet;— barley-water, patent " Infants' Food,"—
all to keep the poor little dear from starving until Mam-

Zl'r^^rri'- 1 ^""'^'"'"^ "^ture in robin^and in Baby
revolts. Ihe bird generally dies. Baby's survival de
pendsupon the strength and activity of the diaphragm
' ^ t'ed twt ''' '"'''''' ^^"^^^^ - industriousfy at^JJ
It is hardly just reasons the natural guardian when
her property is really, as well as nominally made ov^ to
her, that her first official act must be to undo the effects
of mismanagement. But she goes valiantly to work

UP and down .r^™' "°' ^?M^'*^ ^" ^^« ^^«^' ^«^- «^rried
bLXiallvLn '^"''^ ""^'^ "^°"°" ^'^^ monotony act '

Sna Sh?- f"""'!!' ""^^'T^ ^y "^^°P« " a^d over-
teedmg. She is taught, after divci^s battles, to go to sleep
m a quiet cnb m a darkened room ; is put ti bed a stS

BIRTH — NOT BEQINNING,

hours, and given to understand that she is one under wise
authority.

" There is nothing like beginning aright ! " decides
Mamma, triumphant in tlie victory over Self even more
than over the recalcitrant subject of her severity.

" Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy
soul spare for his crying," is the stern counsel of the
Wise Man, whose Rehoboam was an unfortunate result,
if the father's pi-actice matched his preaching. Our
mother's soul has spared, has melted into weak tears
times without number whih the crying was like a knife
in her heart. It was the will, backed by sound sense,
that held fast to resolve and act. She is repaid by th(^
conviction that she has eradicated the rootlets of evil
set by Mrs. Gamp in virgin soil. Or she likens her dar-
ling's mind and disposition to waxen tablets that will
harden into marble with passing years. It has cost her
more trouble than her worst fears had anticipated, to
smooth out the impressions made by selfish ignorance.
She must see to it that the graving done henceforward is
of an order she would not wish to obliterate.

She grows very serious in pondering these things.
New light from her lately-lit lamp of experience falls
upon the old story of the peasant Mother's eager " laying
up in her heart" the hints dropped by inspired lips
touching the character and destiny of her Firstborn.
She begins — and her soul grows as she does this — to en-
ter into the meaning of the phrase, heard a thousand
times from older and wiser people, — as often in mincing
cant from parrot-brained women, drilled by much itera-
tion into what sounds sage, — " Resmnsihilities of Mo-
thers." ' ''

" There are people," remarks Dr. Holmes, " who think
that everything may be done if the doer, be he educa-
tor or pliysician, be only called ' in season.' No doubt,
— but in season would often be a hundred or two

■i

BIRTH — NOT BEGINNING.

is one under wise

aright ! " decides
r Self even more
: severity.
i, and let not tliy
n counsel of the
ifortunate result,
preaching. Our

into weak tears
; was like a knife

by sound sense,

is repaid by th(^
e rootlets of evil
e likens her dar-

tablets that will
It has cost her
d anticipated, to
selfish ignorance.
3 henceforward is
irate.

ing these things.
' experience falls
n-'s eager " laying

by inspired lips
•f her Firstborn,
does this — to en-
eard a thousand

often in mincing
i by much itera-
mhilities of Mo-

tnes, " who think
Der, be he educa-
ison.' No doubt,
hundred or two

years before the child was bom, and people never send so
early as that."

" 1 always scouted the doctrine of original sin until I
had children of my own to rear," ^aid a matron, at a
Mothers' Conference meeting. " Now, I am on the hi<rh-
way to a belief in total depravity." '^

That bulwark of orthodoxy—" The Assembly's Short-
er Catechism," cuts with a broad-axe the knotted cord at
which modern students of human nature and expounders
of theology pick with subtle pliers and dainty finger-
tii)s. There is the full-bodied essence of strong meat'^for
men in the annexed " answer."

" The sinfulness of that estate whereinto man fell con-
sists in the guilt of Adam's first sin : the want of original
righteousness and the corruption of his whole nature
which is commonly called Original Sin, together with all
actual transgressions which proceed from it."

This, then, is Baby's inheritance. From Adam down-
ward, the curious and most interesting law known to
scientists as " atavism" ~i\\Q ancestral bequest of phys-
ical, mental and spiritual traits to succeeding generations
—has been at work. Of direct inheritance from father
and mother it is net my design to speak at length just
here. It is easy of comprehension and readily received,
that the fathers have eaten sour grapes and the children's
teeth are set on edge. But the clear sense of the spiritual
chemists composing the Westminster Assembly, recoo-nis-
ing the existence of deadly elements in the purest strain
ot human blood, reckoned their way back, without waste
of words or time, to the First Sin for the oricrin of the
virus, and included the indefinite series of transmissions
of stain and infusion from line to line under one compre-
from'it " '^~" all actual transgressions which proceed

From this foul stream vomited from a foul fountain
arise the miasmatic vapours that blast the sweetest earthly

BIRTH —NOT BEGINNING.

" Lord ! who did sin — this man or his parents, that he
was born blind ? " queried the gainsayers, believers, all, in
the law of heredity, but forgetting the pregnant clause —
" Unto the third and fourth generation"

No other hypothesis solves the terrible enigma of the
deaths of apparently healthy infants, bom of parents
seemingly as sound, and who, in the management of their
children, obey intelligently wise hygienic rules. Rachael,
weeping for those who are not, cries out in reasonless re-
morse that this was done which cost her baby its life, or
that left undone which might have saved it. Who can
persuade her that the child was fatally injured before its
mother was born ?

" To spoak roundly," says Joseph Cook, " the great law
of hereditary descent is that like breeds like."

Again, a simple law, — so simple that it is axiomatic.
That we do not appreciate it in its extended and tremen-
dous bearing is our fault, or mistake. Baby looked
more like her grandmother than like her own mother
until she was a week old. Most infants come into the
world stamped with this significant seal to the truth of
the principle just stated. And Baby's grandmother prob-
ably looked as much like hers, and so on all the way
back until imagination loses itself in the dim windings of
the ages. Nature is an Ariadne who has never parted
with her clue. We — short of sight and of memory — al-
lude to the continuity as phenomenal, when, in such
families as have preserved the record of former genera-
tions, a remote scion of a progenitor renowned for learn-
ing or virtue, or of infamous repute, repeats history or
tradition and reminds the " magnificent constituency of
mediocrities of which the world is made up " — according
to Dr. Holmes — " the people without biographies, whose
live-, have made a clear solution in the fluid menstruum
of time," that others of their name once formed " a preci-
pitate in the opaque sediment of History."

BIRTH — NOT BEGINNING.

parents, that he
i, believers, all, in
regnant clause —

le enigma of the
bom of parents
lagement of their
1 rules. Rachael,
i in reasonless re-
r baby its life, or
^ed it. Who can
injured before its

k, " the great law
like."

; it is axiomatic,
ided and tremen-
e. Baby lool?ed
her own mother
ts come into the
1 to the truth of
randmother prob-

oa all the way
I dim windings of
has never parted

of memory — al-
l, when, in such
f former genera-
owned for learn-
epeats history or
b constituency of
5 up " — according
iographies, whose
fluid menstruum
formed " a prcci-

We tell, as a pleasant anecdote, of the Mendelssohn
who used to lament that in his youth he was known as
the son, and in his old age as the father of " The Great
Mendelssohn."

We read of Isaac, a minor at forty years of age, walk-
ing in the field to meditate in the eventide that divided
the period of his subjection to his hot-tempered mother
from uxorious thraldom to Laban's sister, — nor ask our-
selves why we drop liim, with Amram and Jesse, as loose
links in reckoning the princes of Israel — Abraham, Jacob,
Moses, and David. Might for good or for evil is not to
be put down even under the feet of Time and Death.
While obeying the reactionary law that holds it back for
a season (that may be a century), it reasserts its rights
once and again, following the channel known to our West-
minster polemics as " descent by ordinary generation."

Our young mother's heart may well be full and her
face grave as she watches Baby's development, and com-
putes, to the best of her poor ability, tlie known and un-
known quantities of the sum set for her to master ; the
pros and cons of death and life, of healthful luxuriance,
of stunted or distorted growth in the vine set in her
nursery.

That she may work rationally and with fair prospect
of success, it is requisite, if only as the means of higher
ends, to establish a healthy habit of all bodily functions.
By the blessed economy of nature that sends but one rain-
drop at a time, there can be no conflict of duties as to date,
space, or importance. If we are twitched a dozen different
ways at once, the fault is our own impotence or blind-
ness, in that we do not read aright the label on each
assigned task.

John Newton says quaintly enough that man's duties
are like a fagot, one stick of which GoD designs for each
day's burden. The weight of a single billet may easily be
borne, by the help of God's grace. The trouble is that
men will persist in adding to-morrow's and yesterday's

BIRTH— NOT BEGINNING.

and next week's sticks to to-day's, so that it is no marvel
when they sink beneath the accumulation.

I would if I could rivet that paragraph— a Silent Com-
forter — upon the heart and conscience of every mother. It
would be tonic, salve, and sedative combined,
f For the present, your rain-drop or billet, or whatever
prefigures the daily duty, is to secure your child's ph\'si-
cal health— a matter of double import, as she is a girl
I hope to make the emphasized section clearer as we eo
on. °

Hinging directly upon this desideratum, comes the
question of Diet.

vftUS

at it is no marvel

on.

h — a Silent Com-

every mother. It
bined.

illet, or whatever
our child's physi-
, as she is a girl.

clearer as we go

itum, comes the

CHAPTER II.

infants' food.

fed, 00 die. Of those brought iip inStut onV^i V V^ ^\^^^ ^artificially
can not yield the necessary food f r thefr ff! ?^;,^^ '^',^1: ^"* '^» bothers
underheH this incap.untv i« farmom m .ij! I' ""if 'V' the weakness which
of the little ones, however caref^nV eel ftfc"°"" '" *':!^"'^'"'"«d to most

"lature graves. '•--7^.;w<cc/^o^&/ui^K™' ' ^ '"^^^^^ i»t« P^e-

ineeting in December. He coufd not LI k "'''*' "^*'''^ Con-ress, at its
classified the causes und" four headsiin^"'"!' 1 "^""^ '>rgent"topic. He
flicted, and the aciuired. Under The fir.H « I'l'"''' J''^ '»?'^'dental the in-
of hereditary diseases ; under L second h.,r ^^'"'^T''^ *" the influence
ter, .and which occur fn.m expXrrto IS nl''T' "f-^^ epidemic charac-
poisons, were considered ; un er the th.VI K "I'l'?' "^ *^^ communicable
bad nursing exeeasive coinpet t" „ in eucat^on and'," '"'"""' f 'T^' ^'"^^
brought under notice ; and under the fo f h h. 'i .. >'".V"Per feeding were
resort to smoking, the use o? stimula t iJt; ho'"''^'''' "•''''«"' ^'''^'^'-ly
'^r5mH'''"''J«'''t'' °f comment. wK^^ , r,.!,]"'''-'''n'' "''•eKular meafs
sibitity of parents for the failur^ in health of Xdre,^"'"^ '"'^'^ *''« ''^^''^-

vanced schoo s of physioloZ ?pf itf ^ ™^'^ ^^-

INFANTS FOOD.

are the usual attendants upon the habit of nourishing her
child from her own bosom.

" Tt is alavery I " cries one, passionately ; " and a de-
grading bondage, a reduction of a refined, intellectual be-
ing to the rank of a mammal female."

Another said to the physician who congratulated her
upon the bountiful supply furnished by Nature for her
tirst-born :

" You can not expect me to injure my figure, ruin my
complexion, and spoil the fit of my dress, i by nursing my
baby as a common washerwoman might ! "

" Madam ! " he returned ; " the most beautiful sight
upon God's earth is that of a mother nourishing her
young from her own breast ! "

Apart from the facilities aftbrded by the fulfilment of
this duty for the study of your child's constitutional pecu-
liarities, the pleasure to the little one and to youi-self of
so many hours of affectionate intercourse, and the inevi-
table strengthening, through these means, of your mutual
attachment, there are substantial advantages in the habit
which are not to be lightly p^ussed over, or disregarded
entirely.

" Like breeds like." Mother and child are as homoge-
neous as trunk and twig. The sap — m Inch we charac-
terize in these circumstances lacteal fluid — is assimilated
naturally and nourishfuUy. The tender digestive organs
recognise it at once ; seldom, and that only under abnor-
mal influences, quarrel with it. The reflex influence upon
the mother comes in, also, as a matter of course.

Without heeding the preposterous notions of dieting
that obtain with the foolishly-superstitious, she will soon
learn that the best food for herself is also best for her
nursling; that what agrees with her stomach, being
readily and painlessly digested, suits Baby, and vice versa.
She discovers, furthermore, that the most useful milk-
producing ingredients are not slops, but juicy meats, good
broths, milk, really excellent ale, oatmeal porridge and

infants' food.

t nourishing her

beautiful sitjht

thiZ' Ihf T '''"^^' -^"^^ n^ '''''' "^ °^^^^r palatable
things that, after supplying Baby's w.-uits, leave in her

own system rich reserves for the replenishment of wasted
tissues and thinned blood. vvasucu

The intelligent woman will bear in mind that the
watery .erum distending the lacteal glands after she has
nnbibed countless bowls of tea and goblets of water to
quench a conslant thirst, while it will, in turn, fill and
unreasonably enlarge Baby's stomach and deposit adipose
matter between bones and skin, can do little else Phos-
phates for bone an.l brain, strong-meat essence for blood •
vegetable nervines that shall act directly upon spina
marrow ami nerve-centres- all these are chemically inter-
fased and adjusted for their appointed agencies in the
patient, faithful retort of the mother's bosom. In the
?,?nnK ^Preciation of this beautiful law of demand and
supply, the old women and " women's doctors " of our
foi-emofchers times physicked the nn^ther when the un-
^ weaned child writhed with colic, and needed pur^ives
■; or astnngents. Still groping after this truth,^S?r un-
I wutten nursery code prohibited her use of fish pickles

., her with caudle and posset ; stayed the craving stomach

'2Zr:^'K'f '^? ^^^^^"^ P^^^^^^ became Tn

XvTr' ^1 ^>:f ^"«^'' '»«r suckling pale and puffy

Water-gruel by- the quart and unlimited tea and coftee

Z7.\ZZ rTT'^' regimen, and the term of nursing

'mS}^,S ? ;^^ pi gnmage graveward. Babies pulled

mothers down to hollow-eyed skeletons, and the mother

^^crificed l^auty, health, and life to keep alive a bkX^

^yspeptic leech that fretted continually and ySS

inarticulate "Giv.! give! "by day and^ight ^

1 You, Mother of To-day have to undo a'nd to amend

ihaSlw!:"' "? ^''' *^^" *? ^^^1^- I^ ^o stress of ^

^n aWeness do y^„ anathematize the mistakes. and

pi es of your predecessors as "actual transgressions"

iBgamst you and yours. You do not modify your judg-

infants' food.

jnent ns there comes to you in some startliriff experience,
or by degrees of ol)s(>rvation, the conviction that the su-
preme fact of Heredity has to do with the higher part
of your chikl's being. U{)on thnt the graving tool of
" ordinary generation " has wrought as industrlou.sly mid
as deeply as upon her physical nature. The most obvious
manifestation of this truth and its practical enforcement
are in the circumstance that your moods and tenses affect
her comfort. Your distress, anxiety, and petulance are
retieeted in her iitful slumbers, convulsive twitchings,
" cross fits."

" The dear lamb's teeth ! " .says the nurse. " The mother's
temper" wouh) be nearer the truth.

While she lies at the breast rising and falling with the
throbbing heart, you have leisure, and we it,^ for the in-
dulgence of the passion or despondency of the hour.
There is pith in the old Scotch saying : " It is sair luck
to cry over a mucking bairn." The farmer flogs the boy
who " races the cows home," not only, he explains to him,
because it les.sens the flow of milk, but that fright and
irritation injure the quality of it. But when bal)y wails
by the hour, " for nothing " — being, so far as nurse and
parents can discern, perfectly well, and free from pin-
pricks — who blames Mamma on that account for the fret-
ful humour that has possessed her all day ? Who remem-
bers with any consciousness of the bearing of one incident
upon the other, that, when she '.iim' in., at noon, 'lot and
jaded from a, long walk, the full h'w'^ of milk pressing
hard upon muscles and vein , ; • ' ooukI not wait to get
her bonnet off before catching up the child and putting
its eager lips to the brimming fountain.

She laughed in mingled relief and amusement when the
hungry little thing choked and gurgled and coughed itself
purple under the rush dov/n its throat into the empty
stomach. Yet she knows that a bottle is best filled
slo^-ly, with judicious respect to the escape of air, if she

.'.*;
1

infants' food.

•25

dWnff experience,
tioti tliat the su-
tlio hi<,'hcr part
{i;raving tool of
tnliistriously iiiid
riie most ob\ ioUH
tical enforcement
i and tenses afi'eet
n'l petulance are
ilsive twitcliings,

se. " The mother's

d falling' with the
usie if, i'or the in-
ncy of the hour.
: "It is sair luck
mer tlojLijs the boy
le explains to him,
it that fright and
, when baby wails
) far as nurse and
nd free from pin-
count for the fret-
ay ? Who remem-
inir of one incident
I at noon, ^ot and
' '^f milk .)r(;.3inj4'
kI not wait to get
child and putting

msement when the
and coughed itself
lat into the empty
)ttle is best filled
scape of air, if she

.gives no thought to the probable effect of heat and weari-
ness upon the food a(lnunistered thus hastily.

I could cite a huii<lred well-authuntieatcd examples of
the evds of what most mothers Jiever think of classin-r
among indiscretions— what they would shudder to liear
described as sins. Let two suffice :

A celebrated New York physician, Dr. Sefniin in a

treatise upon "Idiocy," relates: " JVIrs. "came out

trom a ball-room, and gave the breast to her baby three
months ohl. Jie was taken with spasms, two hours' after,
and since is a confirmed idiot and epileptic."

The secon.l story is familiar to many. A German sol-
dier s wife, seeing her hu.sband attacked by a conu-ade,
fi-uslied in between them, wrested the sword from the
*rassailant, broke it in two, and in a frenzy of an<^<'r
stamped upon the fragments. While still tremblinrr and'
fipeechless in the reaction of the paroxysm, she to.,k her
healthy infant, six months old, from the cradle and put
him to ihe breast. In ten minutes he was a corpse

Boerhaave, philanthropist and physician, in an exhaus-
tive article upon epilepsy, sets down a case of this malady
induced by suckling while the nurse was in a furious ra.ro.
:, While it IS undoubtedly true that the failure of Ameri-
n women to nurse their offspring is largely due toindis-
»osition on their part to consider the act as a duty or to
lertorm it when' they are convinced against inclination

that It i.s obligatory upon the parent; while they acqui-
3ce all too readily in t. 3 dictum of the fashionable nurse
mt there is no manner of use in trying to force milk
%hen there is none there, or so little that it would do the
ehild no good ; it is also beyond question that the quan-
faty seci-eted in the bosoms of some mothers is very small
f he deficiency ma) be the result of disease-fever pul-
monary weakness, or general or constitutional debihtv.
he treatment of such ca.«.eH .should vary according to the
^aracter of the cause of the trouble. When the fever has
-ssed, every gentle means should be emplcj ' -such aa

^m:-:-!,j na i Kar veiiti3'Mi

INFANTS FOOD.

intelligent feeding, mild ale, exercise in the open air, and
frequent application of the child to the breast — to coax
back the milk to the dry ducts. Pulmonary disease —
confirmed and hereditary — should prohibit nursing, as it
ought marriage and child-birth. Where the milkless
fount is the consequence of general weakness, the plain
regimen is to build up the conr -' itution of the mother by
tonics, nourishing diet, and, above all, change of air,
meanwhile intermitting no appliance that might induce a
secretion of the lacteal fluid without drawing too heavily
upon the woman's forces.

The attempt to dry up, by artificial means, what is a
perfectly natural and healthful outgo, is, as might be
predicated withrespect to violent dealing with all nor-
mal bodily secretions, often followed by disastrous
etiects. Consumption, apoplexy, insanity — are among
the graver consequences of obedience to the decree of
indolence, expediency, or fashionable custom. The more
common are hysteria, early and excessive return of the
menstrual period, headache, and general good-for-noth-

ingness.

It is worth while, for the sake of your own health and
comfort, to sit, a patient and persevering learner, at Na-
ture's feet, during the seasons she defines by unmistaka-
ble indications. If, when you have done your best to
follow her promptings, the desired result is not gained,
you have freed your soul from the responsibility of the
failure to carry out her designs.

And, what then ? Clearly, in this case, to give Baby
the best substitute for its natural food that can be pro-
cured. Not until the limit of your " possible " is reached,
resort to wet-nurse, or cow's or goat's milk, still less to
the thousand-and-one variations of " Infants' Food " ad-
vertised as " Better than Mother's Milk." The Creator
never makes such gross mistakes as these poor imitators
would imply.

All that we have said of the influence of diet, temper,

infants' food.

he open air, and
breast — to coax
onary disease —
it nursing, as it
"e tlie milkless
,kness, the plain
F the mother by
change of air,
i might induce a
ring too heavily

cans, what is a
is, as might be
ig with all nor-

by disastrous
ty — are among
the decree of
iom. The more
e return of the

good-for-noth-

own health and
■ learner, at Na-
by unmistaka-
rie your best to
': is not gained,
)nsibility of the

3e, to give Baby
bat can be pro-
ible " is reached,
ilk, still less to
ints' Food " ad-
' The Creator
e poor imitators

of diet, temper.

i; etc., upon the reservoir in the maternal keeping, applies,
V with tenfold pertinence, to the hired nurse who serves

for wages, and not through the sweet compulsion of

Love.

Scrofula, a love of intoxicating liquors, and a coarse,
obese habit of body have, again and again, been posi-
tively traced back to the foster-mother. Cutaneous

^ eruptions, fever, and indigestion are more readily and
frequently transmitted. The occult influences by which
the very expression of countenance, even the mould of
feature, are given by the nurse, rather tlian by the par-
ents, form an interesting and curious subject to the phy-
siological student.

I have in my mind a striking illustration of the secret
and powerful effect of these in the history of a young
girl whom I knew, many years since. Her dissimilarity

• to the other members of a remarkably handsome family
was conspicuous, and, to herself, a source of deep mor-
tification. Her rough skin, corpulent frame, harsh voice,
and loud laugh were unconquerable peculiarities that were
yet a degree less distressing to her refined kins-people
than certain vulgar tastes, such as a liking for tobacco
and spirits, and a relish for broad wit and low company.
The origin of the evil— whispered in shuddering breaths
by her blood-kindred, talked of freely by her acquaint-
ances—was that she had, when an infant, been put to
nurse to a fat Irish woman. In consequence of a lono-

^ illness succeeding the child's birth, the mother's milk was
dried up. The baby was delicate; the woman was
healthy, willing, and close at hand. Under her nourish-

;^iug, the puny girl soon became a wonder of size and
strength. The foster-mother smoked habitually while
the little creature drew sustenance from her breast, and
although never really drunk, was most of the time,

_shghtly under the eficcts of whisky, without which, she
would declare, she "couldn't kape up her own stringth,

^ let alone the dear babby 's." Her boisterous good-humour

INFANTS FOOD,

ili

and coarse jokes, while oilclly at variance with the general
tone of the household, were overlooked as the " harmless
ways" of a privileged servant. Had a disagreeable
temper been one of her failings, it Avould probably have
been excused on accpunt of her devotion to her nursling.
She gave up sleep, recreation, all other companionship, to
be with and watch over her whom the Celtic heart had
accepted in the place of her own dead child. The baby
slept in her bed and arms by night, never quitted ^or
sight for an hour at a time diu'ing the day, for twenty
months. The mother regained strength but shnvly, iaid
there were other children to be looked after, " Baby was
safe, well, and happy with Margaret."

Margaret Maguire was as stalwart of will as of body, a
"character" in the neighbourhood, where, to tell the
truth, her reputation for modesty and sobriety was at a
discount. She stamped herself with such distinctness
upon the memories of those who knew her at this date,
that there was no difficulty, in after years, in recognising
her traits in the development of the girl whom she never
saw after the latter was two years old.

It is absurdly worse than useless to affect disbelief in,
or contempt of, the might of the mysterious tie uniting
a woman to the one for whose sustenance she has, for
months, drawn upon the hidden stores of her own life.
If the mental disorder of the nurse can blight a child
with idiocy, or smite with death, who shall pretend to
define the nature and extent of the moral and intellectual
bias imparted and acquired by this relation ? The nursling
l)ecomes blood of her blood, nerve of her nerve, life of her
life. Why not also, soul of her soul ?

Said an acquaintance in my hearing : " My little boy
has a new wet nurse, the third in six months. One
drank, the other discliarged herself from my service in
a fit of rage that was frightful to behold. She actually
threw a knife at the coachman. I have qow a healthy,
stolid German, whom I hope to keep. She is very stupid

infants' food.

v^ith the general
5 the " harmless
a disagreefible
I probably have
to her nursling,
mpanionship, to
Jcltic heart had
hild. The bo,by
ver quitted '.or
day, for twenty
but sh;vv'ly, and
ter. " Baby was

vill as of body, a
[ere, to tell the
ibriety was at a
lUch distinctness
ler at this date,
•s, in recognising
whom she never

Feet disbelief in,
■ious tie uniting
lice she has, for
of her own life.
1 blight a child
shall pretend to
I and intellectual
)n ? Thenurslinif
nerve, life of her

: " My little boy
i. months. One
)ra my service in
Id. bhe actually
e Qow a healthy,
she is very stupid

and good-tempered, and consumes a great deal of lager-
bier. I hesitated somewhat about engaging her when I
learned that she was not married. It seemed not quite
tlie thing, you know. But our family physician says, ' A
lig for her morality ! All thut you need care to know is
whether she is sound of body ! ' "

I leave mother, physician, and anecdote to point their
moral.

A wet-nurse who is an honest woman, clean in body
and in life, is beyond price when the calamity — I write it
deliberately — the calamity of ;lry breasts overtakes the
mother, or when, in the candia opinion of a doctor who
understands human nature and his business, and respects
both too truly to sink to the level of a " woman's medical
man," she would peril her own health and that of her off-
t spring, in fulfilling this most gracious of maternal tasks.
i But this substitute is alwaj's an expensive necessity, often
altogether beyond the reach of people of moderate means.
In some places and some times, such an one is not to be
had on any terms.

Man is an omnivorous animal. Most other mammals
are by nature either graminivorous, or carnivorous. Your
dog may be trained into toleration of bread and vegeta-
bles as a part of his diet, and if he is very docile or mean-
spirited, into a fondness for sweets. At heart, he prefers
meat, as did his. forest progenitors, and raw, to cooked
flesh. But no dog, however tamely domesticated, will
I eat grass, like the ox, in these ante-millermial days. Nor
[would the hungry or mad ox devour flesh as an article of
I food. Man — as we are opening our -yes to see — must
[eat meat to enrich his blood (" which i's the life "). He
ishould likewise temper blood-heats with fruits and other
lesculents ; strengthen brain-tissue and muscle with the
Iphosphates of fish and crude cereals. A cunning distilla-
^Htion of all these elements is the human mother's milk,
'le who created woman and knows what is in her, or-

INFANTS FOOD,

dained this for the nourishment and upbuilding of the
human infant.

But while the milk yielded by the graminivorous cow
can not furnish all the elements of growth which youi-
baby requires, a very fair imitation of her proper aliment
may be prepared by mixing fresh cow's milk with one-
thii'd the quantity of boiling water and sweetening it
slvjhthj. Thousands of children are leared yearly upon
this diet, and with results apparently so satisfoctory that
many mothers do not hesitate to express a preference for
this mode of treatment above that suggested by Naturt?
and Providence. Should Baby keep well, the defects of
the system may not be manifest to the casual observer.
That she may keep well, the " bottle-baby " must be
tended with especial care and intelligence. You, the de-
frauded mother, should make regular and frequent inspec-
tion of the contents of the tlask and the condition of the
elastic tube which poorly represent to your child the
warmth and refreshment, the " comfort " and the " cud-
dling" of her lawful resting-place and sustenance.

I shall never forget a peep I once had into the nursery
in the house of an opulent family where twin-babies lay
feet to feet in a double cradle under a pink mos(juito-net.
One was pulling vigorously, the other drowsily, at snake-
like tubes leading into two bottles 1} ing beside them.

" But," — ventured I, horror mastering politeness — " tin
milk is curdled ! See the clots ! "

The calm mother bent to make sure of the fact.
'■ Yes !" she drawled. "That often happens in this V(>iy
warm weather. I give them their bottles when I go tn
bed, at night, and usually hear no more of them until neai
morning. Tlien, I find that the little left in each bottle
is ' loppered ' into a firm curd. I sui)pose it must be whole-
some, for they seem to be none the worse for it."

Both babies had a stormy infancy. What with teeth-
ing, convulsions, cholera-infantum, and, in the case of oui
epileptic fitSj the poor mother lost sleep, patience andheuit

'.&.
1

INFANTS FOOD.

upbuilding of the

raminivoi'ous cow
rowth which your
!iei proper aliment
"^'s milk with one-
and sweetening it
eared yearly upon
satisfectory that
ss a preference for
fgested by Nature
veil, the defects of
e casual observei-.
ie-baby " must bo
nee. You, the de-
id frequent inspec-
le condition of tlie
to your child tho
rt " and the '' cud-
sustenance,
id into the nursery
ire twin-babies lay
pink mos(juito-net.
drowsily, at snake-
ig beside them.
g politeness — " the

of the fact,
appens in this v(My
ttles when T go to
J of them until neai
left in each bottle
m it must be wholo-
rse for it."

What with teetli-
[, in the case of one,
), patience and hearts

She " supposed that twins were

times without number,
always heard to reai-."

Perhaps their diet had nothing to do with these dis-
comforts and mishaps. Nature is a brave old mother, bet-
ter tlian any of us deserve,and the Father has compassion
lieyond bound or imagination for the multitude of help-
less ones who " cannot discern between their right hand
and their left hand."

As we have said, while Baby remains passably healthy,
continuing to enjoy and digest her milk without pain or
other unpleasant symptom that all is not right within, tlie
imitation article serves the desired purpose fairly well.
Lnt as mothers and nurses know, there are indications
tjiat the system of the " bottle-baby " rejects as innutri-
tious, and therefore worthless, a much larger proportion
of tlie food administered than does that of the nursling.
Also, by reason of the inordinate quantity of liquid it fs
compelled to swallow in order to secure a certain quan-
tum of nourishment, tho abdomen is gradually enlarged
in a disproportionate degree. TJiese are temporary incon-
veniences. The danger begins with the battle with the
disorders incident to the dreaded teething-period. When
the heattrom the swollen gums pervadeslhe whole body,
and the irritable stomach and relaxed bowels will endui'e
but little food of any description, it is of eminent im-
portance that the little .should be exactly adapted to the
needs of disturbed and over-taxed Nature. In such cir-
cumstiinces it happens so often as to be quoted as a rule,
tliat no substitute for the milk of mother or wet-nurse is
assimilated by the digestive organs.

Such statibtics of comparativ'e mortality among infants
ted Irom thu breast and those "brought up," like poor Pip

|"by hand," as we have collected from Dr. Kolb's report
on tins subject, settle the question— if tliere be any— be-

I yond tl-ie possibility nf doubt or cavil.

■ In the exigency of disordered Nature remedial Science

[ comes to her help— not so much to cure disease as to brace

INFANTS FOOD,

iU I

the constitution to repel it. Rice— boiled to a jelly in
plenty of water very lightly salted, strained through
coarse muslin and slightly sweetened ; arrowroot dissolved
in a little cold water, then cooked in milk to the smooth-
ness and consistency of stai'ch ; pure cream, scalded and
sweetened ; barley, boiled long and slowly, salted a little
and strained ; beef tea, freed from every float of fat, and
administered by the teaspoonful, to restore the lost tone
to the stomach ; — these are some of the accessories by
which life may be supported until the system recovers its
equilibrium. As soon as the need of them has passed, re-
turn to the staple — Milk — more or less diluted with boil-
ing water. In health, and especially in sickness, be wary
of experiments upon the tender stomach. The time for
variety of diet has not come yet. In Baby's clean flask,
each day scalded and aired, carefully rinsed with warm
water before each replenishment with sweet milk, lie
safety and satisfiiction.

Another cardinal principle in the feeding of your infant
is regularity as to time and quantity. Begin by giving
her the breast or bottle every hour, and gradually widen
the interval between her meals until at three months of
age, this settles into a fixed period of three hours. Before
this rule has been established a fortnight, you willooserve
that the delicate mechanism of appetite and digestion has
accepted the regulation of intelligent power, and adjusted
itself most amiably to the arrangement. The advantages
of the system are almost as signal to mother as to child.
She can absent herself from the nursery and house for
three hours — a quarter of the working-day — with great
comfort of mind and body. Baby will not grow hungry
while she is away, nor will the lacteal vess'^ls fill painfully
until the nursing season is at hand. The little one will
play contentedly in the parent's sight without teasing for
food in the many ways that try the temper and nerves of
both, and when out of her presence, the happy child for-
gets that she has a mother. The weak obstinacy of wo-

infants' food.

jiled to a jelly in
strained through
i-rowroot dissolved
ilk to the smooth-
ream, scalded and
vly, salted a little
y Hoat of fat, and
tore the lost tone
he accessories Ly
ystem recovers its
em has passed, rc-
diluted with boil-
. sickness, be wary
jh. The time for
iaby's clean flask,
■insed with warm
li sweet milk, lie

ing of your infant

Beyin by giving

I gradually widen

b three months of

I'ee hours. Before

t,you willooserve

! and digestion has

)wer, and adjusted

The advantages

Lother as to child.

^ry and house for

;'-day — with great

not grow hungry

ess'^ls till painfully

'he little one wi!I

i'ithout teasing for

fiper and nerves of

s happy child for-

obstinacy of wo-

.S3

men who make their boast of the soft hearts that will not
et them cleny the darlings anything, would be less repre-
hensible ]f It acted hurtfully only upon themselves They
tell you, with a sickly smile meant for motherly-sweetness
that they cannot Ml in with latter-day innovations upon
natural affection, that they nurse their babes (that style
o[ parent IS apt to say, "babe" and "lamb")-whenever
they ask to be fed, without regar.l to times and seasons.
J hey have not the knack of putting aside the claims of
their offlspringas is the manner of strong-minded women."
Iheir tolly is abundantly illustrated, one would think, by
the.r chalky cheeks and hollow chests, without requirin'-r
tlie outspoken denunciation of sensible observers

it would be a waste of our time and strength to en-
deavour to persuade these complacent martyrs that they
injure their children even more than themselves.

nr L. L. i age, m a treatise upon the management of

imklg;nT"''''^' '"''"''^^ '"""^ j"'^^^ "P^" '"^^ *^""'^

" The only wonder is that any infant lives sixty davs

rombirh Fed before birth but three times a day le

venTJ f '^'J '"^J*^"'"^, ^? '''' ^^- *^^"ty meals in^the

is '^ftU^^'^f " '? 'Y''^'^- r'^ ^" ^^''' connection. Baby
L f 1 "^^ ''"^^'^'^-'^''^^ "^ option of her own. When

• li^mayed. All healthy babies throw up their milk "

If It comes up curdled, it is accepted as a sign that she

got the nourishment out of it " before rejectin<. it If she

olc ^twtl'"^''^ Vr°^^' '' aflerward, she £:
from" thJ nr. 1 '''^'' ""i H'" surcharged stomach ache

": prbaSfr' ''^ '^"' '^-^ ^^^ ^^^^^^^ ^^-

diswTy'^thlT S'"' '^'"P •'"' ^'^ ^."^ '^^^' positively and
Sthv mnfW • ' n«rsmg-period of a moderately-
healthy mother, is no more a state of invalidism, per se

infants' food.

than is preo-nancy, or what is known as the " channe of
life." In all three conditions, certain simple laws slwuld
•.fovern your management of yourself. Irregular habits
then are moi-c than " shil'tle'ssness." They are a sin
against yourself, and those dependent for comfort and
happiness upon your health. In laying the soothing
unction to her vanity, that she is saci'iticing her own for
her child's good, she Avho, in becoming a mother, ceases to
be fmything else, shows herself to be as ignorant as slie
is silly. She serves her kind in keeping herself fi-esli
and sound. _ Every refresliing bath, every hour of whole-
some exercise in the open air, every season of deep,
healthful sleep,— all reasonable recreation and the con-
tinual feast of a merry heart, tell surely, if not visibly,
upon her baby.

The harvest for mother and offspring, — of which +his
is the seed-time — is in the coming years.

.'^jM

I i i
! ii

CHAPTER III.

-of which ^liis

S T A R T I N a E V E N .

^mJtV^^?* "^'i*'- m"? ^''■'' tl;« experipnce .,f Caspar Hauser. We 8ur.
^utd them from birth by conditionn that ho stunt their Jmvth that thlv
Brly cease to crave a freedom which their weak frimp^ w^>„ ,1 « i\ i ^

Ivity, Ro imbued with the clea of the unhecomint^m « ^f to physical pas-

One who has won for herself an honourable place in the
Mnerican world of letters, writes thus to me •—

" Thanks to my delicate constitution— (the local doc-
ars informed my pa.-ents that I was born without any)
-I was not confined so closely in the school-room dur-
ag niy childhood as were some of my companions I
arly developed a love for Avanderings a-tield and for
hodland sports that sorely puzzled and mortified my
oother. Sitting stfll with my best frock on, and a sash
Dund smoothly about my waist, brought on pain in the
Ide. Sewing on patchwork and knitting garters ^ave
e a sick headache. To the great scandal of the ?dm
isses who visited my elder sisters, 1 cared nothing foi-
be uohs they dressed for me, less than nothing foi pav-
Ig and receiving visits. To dress-as my contempo-
|nes remind me, to this day-I was indifferent! T-
|ded my clothes were whole, clean, and stout enough to
far the tugs of brieiy hedge and scrubby brake^ I
ftent my afternoon and Saturday holidays in > the outer

^l 11

i\ f

ill

STARTING EVEN.

air. If 1 must study, I took my books with me, and
conned my tasks, perched in the boughs of orchard or
forest, or lying prone and Imlf-buried in glass or clover.
I fished, climbed, wadecf, rode bare-backed horses, raced
and whooped with my young brothers, until, at the age
of twelve, I was the torn -boy of the neighbourhood, — sim-
burned, lithe of limb, well, and approvei' of by nobody
except " the boys," and (secretly) by my t:i ther. I have
since had reason to believe that it was my mothers dis-
covery of his flagitious conduct in teaching me how to
carry, load, and fire his fowling-piece, that led, at length,
to her energetic measure of ' taking me up from grass,'
buckling on bit and bridle, and putting me into the
break -waggon of a boarding-school.

'By this time, 1 was Willing — because fit to study.
In five years I was gradurt^d with distinction, by the
highly I'espectable instituticu to which I owe my scho-
lastic training. I was a pale, .slim girl, who turned to the I
country and to indolence with the instinct of an uncaged
animal. When other debutantes were plotting and busy-
ing with the season's conquests at watering-places tind-
sea-shore, I deliberately and invariably preferred rusti-
cation in a farm-house, where I could spend most of the
day out-of-doors ; could live upon fruit, vegetables, and
milk ; go to bed in the twilight and sleep ten hours even
night like a tired baby.

" I laughed when thrifty housewives called me ' lazy,
and they and their notable daughters thanked their rest-
less stars that their bodies and minds were cast in a diftei-
ent mould. I simply did not care a ru.sh for their stricture
or for their praise. It is the sickly or the morbidly-sen-
sitive Avho are hurt by idle gossip.

" At twenty, I stopped growing ; my figure rounded ;
colour came to my .sallow cheeks ; a great bound of phy-
sical and mental energy to my whole being. At twenty-
two, I published my first book. I had written it beeausi
I had something to say, and it found more readers than 1

STARTING EVEN.

)oks with me, and
ighs of orchard or
in grass or clovor,
eked horses, racoil
s, until, at the a;^^'
ghbourhood,-— suii-
vei^ of by nobody
nv t";ithor. I luivo
s my mother's di.s-
aching me how to
tliat led, at lengtli,
ne lip from grass,'
bting me into the

ause fit to study,
distinction, by the
;h 1 owe my scho-
, who turned to the
;inct of an uncagoi'
plotting and busy-
atering- places ami
)ly preferred rusti-
spend most of tin
lit, vegetables, ami
sep ten hour.s eveiv

3 called me ' lazy,
thanked their rest-
rQVQ cast in a difi'ei-
for their stricture>
• the morbidly-sen-

ly figure rounded:
reat bound of phy-
)eing. At twenty-
written it becausi
nore readers than I

had dared dream of addressing. I was twenty-four when
I married the man of my free and hajjpy choice. I have
borne five healthy children; been the mistress ©f a large
house, and, my husband's position requiring me to go
iimch into society at home and abroad, have enjoyed the
duties of hospitality and of .social in*^ercourse, with an
extensive circle of friends and acquaint uces. In all this
time I iiave been steadily engaged in literary pursuits.
My faithful pen has brushed aside many a teasing annoy-
ance, kept ennui at bay, and prevented the rust and mould
from settling upon my mental acquisitions.

" I am fifty years old to-day,— hale and plump, as
young ni feeling and as buoyant in hope as I was thirty
years ago. God willing, I shall, in the next decade, do
the best work of my life. My sisters are, one and all
'delicate' married women, meagre, sad-eyed, with faded
complexions and dragging step. They eye me curiously
and agree in the opinion that my zest in work and pleasure,
ray healthy appetite and unimpaired digestion, my stir-
rmg habits and ambitious schemes are ' phenomenal in a
a person of my age.' I attribute the difference between us
to the blind trustfulness with which I, without knowing
what I was doing, or why, committed myself in the grow-
ing season to the guidance of Nature. Drugs and tonics
were early decided to be valueless in the case of a consti-
tutionless girl. Had I been an only child, nursing and
l)amperiug would have sent me to an early grave. Being
one of eight, with three older and four younger than my-
self, I was allowed to run wild. A diseased child might
have died under what was to me a wholesome and saving
letting-alone. Happily it was exactly what I needed.
-I I'Ovidentially, I found the catholicon.'"'

I transcribe the letter as it comes to me, and at full
jength, because the narrative is instructive, and will, I
believe, interest others as it has interested me, even al-
though the writers name is, by request, withheld. Her

STARTIN(} EVEX.

opistle lias furnishod the text of more than one cliantcr
111 this W(jrlv.

Dr. Clai-ke, in discu.ssinjr tlio question of the " Itlenti-
oal (!o-o(hicati()ii of tlic S(!xes," has this passage :—

" To nuiko hoys lialf-.:n-ls ami i^iils lialf-hoys can nevoi-
he the k'n-itimato function (»f any coni'j,'e."

Without stayini; to (|uihh]o npon the'lk-claration as ap-
plied to the colh'i^natt! tniiniuu' of v„un;,' nuni and voun-
women, let ns, in the li^dit of the time story we have jiisl
i^iven, impure .seriously whether a process similar to thnt
dei)iycated hy our learned physician as unwise for adult
pMpds, may not he safe and Judicious treatnit>nt forc/iil-
aren.

For twelve years after your dau;,diter hei^dns to run
a one and to he conscious of her iiidivi<lu!il'ity, she is—
physically— untrammelled hy the accident of her sex. It
IS not true, as some rashly and others sentimentally
alhrm that the girls are, from the heirinniiiir, frailer than
their hrothers. If 1 may he pardoned for the personal
allusion, 1 will state that in my own home-hand, this rule
]^ emphatically reversed. My two hoys, althou-di healthy
iiiiants, were, from the hcginning of their lives, more sh^n-
der of figure and limh ; more nervous in t(wiiperament
and in stomach, more sensitive than Avere their rohust
sisters. They took cold oftener ami under less exposure
and the degree of fiitigue or excitement that made the'
giHs sleep soundly, cost them tossuig and feverish ni-dits

My surprise at the estahlishment of the idiosyncrasies
as facts made me to look keenly and far for like refuta-
tions of the theory of innate delicacy on the part of -drls
hy reason of their sex. The result of the investio-a'tion'
has confirmed me in the helief that, other things"heino-
equal, our ,sonfi and cUitu/hlers start cran. ^

Wet-footed Willie, ste'aling up the hack-stairs to the
nursery at the closing-in of an af f ernoou's play hvforhid-
iTidden pond or in the snow, is a^ liable to pay'thc penalty
ot disobedience by an attack of croup or pneumonia as

STARTING KVEN.

.•W

ifin one chnptor

of the " Itlenti-
)as,sage : —
-boys can never

clamtion as ap-
iiKMi and y()iinL,f
•y we have Just
siinilar to that
nwise for a(hjlt
Ltnient /b/'c/i!//-

bojLjln.s to run

uiility, she is —
of her sex. It
sentimentally
n<^, frailer tliaii
^r the personal
-band, this rule
thon-,di liealthy
ves, more slen-
1 temperament
re their robust
r less exposure,
that made the
feverish nights.
I iiliosyncrasies
for like refuta-
e part of <,nrls,
e investio-ation
r thin««s beinn-

ik-stairs to the
play by forbid-
ay the penalty
jjneumonia as

ildy-cheeked Mamie who has shared the fun and helps
III ti) kccj) thii seeret of thi'ir soaked shoes and stock-
for fear of a presc-nt scoldinj,' or ))enitential taie for
^)\)v.r. Gret^n apples disaj^jree as sui-ely with one as with
other, and the sanu! kind and amount of hard play
Is the like seipifnee of fatigue. Tli<! chanees arc; that,
|th her brother's conu'ades, the niei-ry, active, bravr-

utcd little i.nrl passes for a " better fellow " than Wil-

himsclf. I Jns))oiled l)y sentimental saws of the shrink-
fcflilcness of the we:iker vesscd, the boys do her
levers justice, acknoM'l'.;:.lgelier as their ecjual in prowess
d t.'ndui'an(;e.

J)r. Clarki; is exj)licit and admiiable here : —
'' No scalpel has disclosed any ditfeninco between a

n's and a woman's liver. No analysis or dynameter
.s discovt'i'ed or mrasurcil any chemical action or
rve-foi'ce that stamps either of these systi^ms " — (/. e.,
nutritive and neivous) — " as male or female. From

■se anatomical and jdiysiologieal data alone the infci-
,ce is legitimate that intellectual power, the correlation
(1 measure of cerebral structure and metamorphosi-' is
pable of equal development in both stfxes."
Jione, muscle and blood are of like and the same sub-

nce in both, and to this assertion Ave may add J)r.

rke's sequitur, as given above — "capable of ecjual
ivelopment."

^Having admitted as much, we are yet liardly prepared
a foot-note a few pages further on in our valuable

ex in Education."
"According to the authority of MM. Queletet and

its, the mortality of the .sexes is equal in childhood,

that of the male is greater." Not— so we learn from
Brtlier investigation of this interesting fact— because.
|e bold, adventurous spirit of the boy leads him iyto
" lis the girl escapes by her sheltered life, but that the

inary diseases of infancy bear more severely upon

1 than upon her. Without Ijeing superstitious or

STARTING EVEN.

fatalistic Ave who have lived to middle-age sometimes
confess to an uncomfortable impression, drawn from
observation that the only son in a family of daugC
Ls more likely to be stricken down than any one of the

of H^hnn^'T ?'''' l\'' *''"'' ^^'^ ^^^'^^ «^^^ and heart
of the household are taken away in the untimely death

cm^ntl?r'"°".' TlL^''^- ^"* *'^^ testimony of scientific
compilation of statistics goes to prove that the balance of
vital energy is less firm in the boy than in his sister up

fourteen' '^''''' ""^ '^'''~''' "^^'^ '^™^*^^«' "P ^'^

By such research and kindred conclusions a problem is
set^tairly and squarely before us :

Can the uncompromising common sense of the mother

stoiy-sofor fortify the constitution of her girl during
this golden period, M^hen the scale of strength and weak^
?avo,;v ^7"^/.^'l-^^«d. or, if it wavers, trembles in htr

unlowomeT?"''' ''"^^ ''''''' P^^^--^- appointed

"Boys will be boys!" we say, stroking Willie's

cropped hair, and kissing his bronzed or frefkled iace!

Jie IS laying up strength for the Battle of Life "
, Ihat he may do this to better advantage, we equip him
m corduroy or « drilling " breeches, blue-fiannel S and

virttn "'"i^ ^'fj^""' ^^^ ^'''^ <^«^«kin boots imp^x?
vious to mud and thorns, and turn him louse in his vaca-

l2r ll-71 "'°"*^^'' ^.^ J°^ *° ^"^^ «^at the future
votei,-legis]ator,-president-is as free from care and
full of fun as is the rough colt he seizes by the mane in
the pasture for " a oily ride." It is Mamie^ vacation t o
but she must practise at least two hours a day, and there
Lt^r7l -^^ ^ancy-work she has set her heart upon
finishing this summer. If mamma is one of the "dd
fashioned sort," she insists moreover, that her girl shall
know something about plain sewing and learn to dam

STAETING EVEN.

stockings, if not to knit them. Besides these hindrances
to her participation in Willie's sports there is — most for-
midable and paramount to all other considerations — that
due to complexion and clothes. Mamie is a brunette,
and tans. Jennie is a blonde, and freckles. And not to
be " dressed " in the afternoon would be a lapse into bar-
barism, at thought of which every decorous establishment
shudders in all its parts and members.

" We pass three months of every year in the country
— the real, out-of-door-and-window country, where there
are hills and woods and water and berry pastures," said
a mother, when congratulated upon the health of her
children. " During that time, ' full dress ' means to my
little girls, the exchange of a soiled calico or Holland
frock for a clean one. On cool, or rainy days, there is
always the invaluable blue flannel."

Her girls grew into young women with exquisite com-
plexions, clear white and softly-shaded rose-pink. They
had sound digestions, clear heads, 'light hearts and no
backs — to speak of.

It is well for mothers to know and teach their daugh-
ters the simple truth that one can be trimly and becom-
ingly arrayed in linen or gingham morning and walking-
gowns, and that on summer afternoons in the country,
a wash-lawn or cambric is more suitable, because more
comfortable, than silk and grenadine. A child puts on
self-consciousness — thut bane to human comfort and
grace — with clothes that must be thought of and cared
for at every turn.

I have naught to say against embroidery and plain
sewing. Of a fair practical knowledge of the lattei- 1 am
a stanch advocate. Girls in every station should be in-
structed in the use of the needle. Sewing-machines and
ready-made lingerie do not obviate the need of neat
mending — tlje setting, in the right place and way, the
timely stitch that saves nine. A knowledge of the rudi-

'f.

STARTING EVEN.

ments of needle-work sl.ouM be as much a matter of
course as to know the alphabet

mrti!.'f ?n /'' f^^u' ^T' "";^ '^''^^' ^^''^^J'-ol>os and ten-
pa tes. most of all, when play-house and l.anqtiet-hall
.. e in o-arden or grove. The bit of fancy-w. rk is to

scioU-.saw IS to hnn-recreation aud practice ill ,lextev-
ous man.pulat.on. Son.e n.en and a few women nev>r
earn to use their fingers. When any one of these pas-
times degenerates into a task, it ought not to be n -
pc^ed upon tl.e child in vacation. AtTthe mention of ^ .

nXf long ht;^ "''^'^^^^'^ "i^^-^^^^-"^^" - "-y -^1

thiI'l.'pnTr'^'lf''T^ 'Ti'"'' ^'■? '°"'^"" *'^ ^'"^^^ ««"«es on
lieve ttf •^I'^'^^'l^^'^ ««»'■? of '-ational thinkers to be-
iieve that in the next generation the grievous exercise of
strummmg automatically for one, twc^ or five hour ;;
irrr ; ^'f^^^^^f^-^^^ keyboard will be, at leas
our .W^ . W''^ ";^^"^^'' ""'' ""l^"own imposition. Jn

the custom ot teaching music indiscrinu.nitely. My pre-

one, two, three, four" is penance without a oleaiu of
mitigation or hope of compensation. ""

" 1 put my daughters, to the piano so soon as thev can
reach an octave," said the mother of five dauohte is w\t
virtuous soli.lity that left me nothino to ay ° ' iSch
them spends two hours a day at the instrunfent."

weVoffi'fr.l''f 'V^^'"'f ^y. ^-^^^^^tion. why, in sue!,
well-ofiicered families, there is but one '.'instrument '
J he suggestion of torture is natural and inevitable.

Alamie s fingers will be supple enough at twelve, or even
at tourteen, to accomplish runs and shakes, shoul I she b -
then d^cov«r a decided taste and love for tiie long-abus 1
art. Do not-in the absence of indicatiouK of the divln
thirst and longing for musical expression which is genius

STARTING EVEN.

uch a matter of | -sacrifice, diurnally, two liours of sunsluno and sweet

an- and sucli aftlii.iuco of iiiuoceiit (]eli^•ht m the more
fact ui" boinir a/h'e, as only cliildhood over knows this side
of the Land of Eternal Youth, to tlio igi.ohle ambition to
have your baby " accomplished." The Jiattle of Life yoii
anticipate for lier brother will be a holhlay skirmish in
comparison with the tedious stru-^crle that may so probably
be hers. Heaven help her and you !

Should she inherit from parents or from a more remote
ancestry, constitutional infirmity or liability—a score of
unijaid forfeits to injured Nature— be (piick to discern
and speedy tliese, and let your guard be the more wise
and vigilant. Study her peculiarities of <ligestion, motion,
speech, likings, and antipathies, and adapt your I'neasures
of precaution, correction, and guidance to her needs. Oive,
as the Iiou.se-mother and caterer, much attention to Die-
tetics, I am never more nearly in despair of the physical
retormation of my kind than wlien I witness the culpable
Ignorance of mothers and liousekeepers in this respect.
Lear with a few illustrations of my meaning from tlie
vast number that crowd upon iny memory.

Some years ago, while summering in the country I sa w
from my window^, one morning, while dressin'>-, a little
urchin, the .son of a fellow-boarder, standin.-- ankTe-deep in
the dewy grass of the orchard shaking down and devour-
ing unripe pears. Knowing that he had not been well for
several days, I took-the liberty, after breakfast, of men-
tioning tlie scene to his mother. I rarely interfere with
luy neighbours' family government, but 1 loved the boy
an<l knew the mother intimately. She looked up plea-
santly from her book.

" Ah, yes ! he spends much of his time there, T fancy
My experience with children convinces me that little 'is
gained by watching and prohibition, and no lastin«T harm
done by letting them eat and drink what they pleaJio All
ot mmo. have a hereditary predisposition to weakness of
tJie stomach and bowels, which I trust they will out<-Tow

?P;;i

ifi

STARTING EVEN.

in time. I never physic them unless to ease great pain.
An attack of cholera morbus usually sets all right again
if the indulgence is carried too far."

It was none of my business to regulate the family di-
gestion, and, accepting the fact, I let the matter drop.
Sadder thoughts visited me when, ten years thereafter,
her eldest son, a promising lad, died at boarding-school of
peritonitis induced by a midnight supper of crabs, Welsh
rare-bit, pickle.^,, and peanuts. Joe, the little pear-gatherer,
is a tall, slight young man, who will never be strong, hav-
ing, his wife 'aments, " a chronic trouble." Another boy's
college course has been broken up three times by serious
illnesses that have left him pallid and nervous. Two
pretty young daughters, fragile, even for American girls,
are already, at seventeen and nineteen, hopeless dys-
peptics.

" Actual transgression " did not cease with our grand-
fathers' eating of sour grapes. This mother loved, ana be-
lieved that she served her children faithfully. For all
that, she stands convicted at the bar of Common Sense, of
infant-slaughter.

In grateful relief to this story, let me cite that of two
brothers, whose constitutional peculiarities were utterly
unlike, the one to the other. One fair-haired, blue-eyed
boy was born with an inherited proclivity to weakness of
digestion and laxity of the bowels. The mother began,
when he was not two months old, her measures for coun-
t^iacting thtise tendencies. He took nothing except the
nourishment provided for him by Nature until his gradual
weaning, at nine months of age, began. The mother had
her naturally quick temper in excellent control, yet I re-
member seeing her indignant to wrath one day, when her
baby was brought home by the nurse from a visit to a
neighbour, his hands full of candy and cookies.

" How dared you let him have that poison ? You knew
better ! " cried the mistress, snatching the sweets from the
fingers that clutched them tightly and throwino- them
into the fire. °

STARTING EVEN.

"I said so, ma'am!" said the girl, eagerly, "tl told

1 .1 •^' r ^}^^^ ^^^ ^'^^^^' allowed him to eat such

things And she told me to say to you, ma'am, that
she had raised ten children of her own, and 'twasn't for
elderf " "^ *° ^""^ themselves up to be wiser nor their

The mother quieted down instantly
"This is wy child !" was all she said.
It was a_ recognition of responsibility from which no
advice nor impertinence could absolve her

In pursuance of her hygienic system, she alternated
Ihis nursmg-tiines with cautious administrations of fresh
Icows milk scalded slightly, and diluted with one-fourth
las much boiling water. Rice boiled soft, or rice-flour
Isometimes thickened it. When his carnivorous teeth
lappeared, he had beef -tea, rare beefsteak chopped fine
Itender chicken and lamb, also minced, and strengthening
Igroaseless broths Ice-water, unripe and stale fruits, calve!
■pastry, hot bread and griddle-cake.s, pork and veal in all
their varieties, were prohibited articles of food even when
he was a healthy lad, with no sign, to the general view
ot lurking disease.

k ^^^,?/o""ger son was dark of hair and skin,— a bold,
beautiful fellow, of a nervous-bilious temperament. As
ivith his brother, the evil that threatened him appeared
Mmoat on the threshold of his life. It was constipation
to stubborn, that love and determination, backed by an
Intelligent appreciation of the danger of neglect, rallied
Promptly to combat it. As diligently as the mother had
lought out wholesome astringents, she now us ^ laxative
lood. Indian and oatmeal gruels, baked and stewed and
raw apples, ripe peaches, grapes from which the seeds
H^ere rejected with the skins, milk warm from the cow,
^ glass of cold water drunk each night at bed-time, an
frange eaten daily by the youth as the first courae of his
pieaktast— (jrraham and corn- bread, hominy and wheaten
gilts —were some of the correctives applied to lessen

I i

fti

STARTING EVEN.

the infirmity. In both instances, her skill wrought sue- 1
cessfully to complete the cure. In neither did the sub-
jects of the regimen, as infants or lads, rebel against hei'
'will. " Mother thinks it is not good for me," answered |
every temptation. Her sons had learned through her in-
strumentality priceless lessons of self-control, faith and!
obedience, more useful, if that could be, than the hard- [
won blessing of health which was the mother's gift.

CHAPTER IV.

-^ll

HANDICAPPED.

" Three generations of wholesome life might suffice to eliminate the ances-

Constitutional weaknesses are not to be laid at the
tt oor of our common mother. Nature. Custom and imor-
Ince have been meddling so long with her legitimate Sper-
Itions.that she may well decline to recognise in the modern
broduct more than a pitiable burlesque of the model.
^ In the full comprehension of this truth, the sensible,
.OD-fearing mother sees cause for anxiety and care —
kever for despondency. To return to Dr. Holmes's witty
(bservation relative w the unavoidable tardiness attend-
ant upon the beginning to set human nature to rights—
lou, to whom this girl is committed, are building, not for
Ihis, or the next generation, but for the century-or two
-to come Nobody except a selfish fool echoes the ne'er-
lo-well who, on being reminded of his obligations to the
liture, blurted out : — •

"Hang Posterity ! I owe it nothing ! What will it ever
3 tor me, I should like to know ! "

The Mother is the true representative of Radical Reform,
^e doctor who " ought to have been called in a hun-
dred years or so, ago ! "

What was the need of such summons then, let Mrs.

Jelany the nurse and beloved prodigy of the court of

eorge III, tell us. In her " Life and Litters," we read of

HANDICAPPED.

sovereign specifics for whooping-cough and other infantilo
maladies compounded of saffron, rosemary and slugs.
Earthworms were highly esteemed as a medicament, also
wood-grubs, and wine in which vipers had been put while
alive, and left to steep, was drunk by consumptives. The
court-physicians bled fainting women to relieve " breath-
lessness," Skilled nurses did up babies as tightly as they
could be rolled, in yards of swaddling linen; fed royal
nurslings, a month old, on barley water with currants
boiled in it, and called subsequent — we would write
boldly, " consequent " — convulsions, the mysterious visi-
tation of the Almighty. It is well to sight such shore-
marks once in a while, that we may really credit the |
blessed fact of Human Progress. Since we have learned i
so much and practised so ably upon our knowledge smce |
the year of our Lord 1750, let us not fear to set our stand- j
ard well forward.

Some of the finest women, physically and mentally,
whom I have ever seen, were famous romps in their youth j
— the " half -boys " of Dr. Clarke's disquisition. All of '
them during the tom-boy stage lamented secretly or loudly i
that they were not their own brothers ; regrets which
were heartily seconded by much-enduring mothers andj
disappointed fathers.

1 have now before me the picture of myself at ten years I
of age, looking up from the back of my pony into my fa-
ther's face, as, in the course of the morning ride we daily!
enjoyed together, he was led by my questions into an ex-!
position of the policy of the old line Whig Party, so cleaii
and strong, that a duller-witted child could not havef
failed to comprehend it. My comments called up a smile|
and a sigh.

" Ah, my daughter ! if you had been born a boy yoi^
would be invaluable to me ! "

1 hung my head, mute and crushed by a calamity past|
jbuman remedy or prevention. There is a pain at mvi

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cl other infantile
ary and sluf^s,
ledicament, alsu
[ been put while
isumptives. The
[•elieve " breath-
! tightly as thi'}!
linen; fed roytil
r with currants
re would write
mysterious visi-
ight such shore-
eally credit the
we have learned
inowledge since
to set our stand-

and mentally,!

heart in the telling that renews the real grief of the mo-
ment.

Your girl wants to help her father and to be of use in
the world. Make her feel that a woman's life is worth
livmg, and that she has begun it. Do not brand her from
the cradle "Exempt from field duty on account of vhv
siecU disability." j i- a

Fifty years ago " legs " was almost a tabooed word in
pohte society, and, if Captain Marryatt's evidence is worth
anything, women in the United States did up the lower
limbs of their pianos in frilled mufflers.

Forty years ago, when I came wailing into the nursery
to show a knee rasped and bleeding from a fall on the
gravel walk I was hushed up with, « Fie ! what a word '
Little ladies haven t knees ; their feet are pinned to the
bottom of their pantalettes ! "

Thirty years ago young girls in describing the antics
• .V. • l\m'^ <^iPP'ng tables," told how "the thing actually lifted
C.S m their youth fcp its-toe-and tapped on the floor." ^ '

ecretlv or budl l" ^"1^. ^^^"^^ ^tf '^^'"' ^ "^'^^ «^ *^^ ^^^^^ standing.

. regiets whicli»iijiess and death, mentioned that, three days before her
klecease, "her hmh became very painful and began to
3well rapidly. ^

Your Mamie, more fortunate than these adherents to a
lock-modest fashion, is permitted the , ownership of as
teady a pair of legs as her brother can boast, unveiled
)y pantalettes ; her stockings gartered, the mother does
lot blush to say, above the knees, or held up by an ela«-
10 ribbon attached to the waistband. See to it that she
IS taught their use as early and as thoroughly as she ac-
nures the command of her arms and hands.

It IS strange tliat even fashionists and purists should
•veilook the importance of developing at this period the
auscles of a girls hips, thighs, and vertebrae, as the por-
lons ot her frame upon which coming seasons will lay
nost weight and strain. We have backboards, braces

[ig mothers and

self at ten years
lony into my fa-
3g ride we daily
iions into an ex-
g Party, so clear
could not have
jailed up a smile

born a boy you

a calamity past|
s a pain at ml

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dumb-bells, and calisthcnic drills for making shoulders
straight, arms strong, and chests deep. But it is esteemed
hoydenish to ran, not to speak of the danger of makinfj
the feet large. Tlie latter objection obtains to stout walk-
ing-shoes with broad toes and low heels, and preference
is given to the narrow French boot, the tajering heel of
which is far enough forward to leave a "lovely "small
track in nnul or dust. Jumping, racing, and climbing, if
not prohibited, are never encouraged, by those who are
bent upon the cultivation of a " graceful carriage " in their
young daughters.

If your ambition in this regard is subordinate to yoviv
desire that Mamie shall be healthy, and comely, with the
free graces of youthful vigour, insist that she shall walk,
winter and summer, and in all weathers, stepping out as
do Willie and Jack instead of mincing along, pigeon-
wise, or tottering above the fashionable fulcrum set be-
neath her instep. Let her hold her shoulders back and
her head up, and not feel obliged by decorum to cross or
join her hands on the pit of her stomach and keep them
there, skewered by Fashion as inexorably as the wings
of a trussed fowl to its plump sides.

How many scoj-es of times have you heard school-girls
— and older women — beg, " Give me something to hold.
I never know what to do with my hands in the street ! "

Parasol, fan, a green spray, a la Madame de Staiil, even
an empty envelope is a relief to the gaucherie of those
who never suspect the trouble to be, not with the hands,
but with what our mothers would have designated as the
" lower limbs." They can sit, stand, dance, but not one
in forty knows how to walk. The gliding step borrowed |
from the minuet, the tip-toe, the Grecian bend, are, as |
Beau Brummel's valet said of the crumpled cravats—
" some of our failures." Our streets are full of slouch-
ing women, tripping women, sliding and skipping women,
and — most frequent as most ungraceful among stout,
middle-aged matrons — with waddling women, these car-

HANDICAPPED.

ird school-ffirls

rying tlieir feot so near tof;ether that— to borrow a veter-
inary phrase— they " interfere " at every step. Ask your
liiisbanJ or brother what proportion of the hidies whom
he escorts on promenade and picnic fall naturally and
easily into step with him ; how many can accomplish a
sharp run for train or boat, or emulate swift Camilla in
scourir;g the plain in chase of tennis, or cro(iuet-l)all.

'I It doesn't hurt little girls to run up and down-
stair ,," says Grandma, at Mamie's twentieth expedition
to the second story. " They are so light upon their feet."

Grandma has grazed one edge of the truth. Mamie's
feet— and legs— were made for nmch and lively use, as
nobody know^-. better than their owner. Sitting still
makes her " fidgetty," at least, until she has become used
to the unnatural state of inaction. Blood, muscle, and
the ceaseJesn play of electric currents from vein to rierve
which we name " animal spirits," chafe and rebel into hot
mutiny. Mother, aunts and elder sisters " wonder if it is
a physical impossibility for that child to keep her feet
still." It is,— or ought to be. Kinder and wiser Nature
incites her continually to run off restlessness in road or
field, achieving, meantime, ends far higher than present
gratification. The boy's inability to keep still for one
moment, unless when sick or asleep, is an acknowledged,
well-nigh respected fact. Little girls are checked, re-
proved, tutored and trained until only the tenuous wire
of Damascus steel, familiarly known as feminuio will,
preserves them from utter loss of individuality.

Mamie has feet. Do not pinch them at "^the toe or
raise the heel too high. Continuing the subject, do not
impede circulation or paralyze muscle by tight buttonino-
at the ankle or too close ligatures above or below the
knee. The clothing about the hips should be loo.se and
light, the waist uncorseted until it takes on, of itself, the
curves of womanly shapeliness. And let her play with
her brothers, if .she has any. If not, with the bcst-man-
ncred little boys she knows.

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HANDK^APPED.

I am not inrnorant of tlio tlisr^racofiil truth that som(>
brotlieis are not tit playmates for thoir own, or " other
follows' " sisters. They have " u-ly ways," re^a-et mother
and nurso. That js, they have uns(>em!v trieks of lan-
gua^'o and action, such as no " little lady " should hear
and see, nnich less imitate. Tliey al.juro all forms of
courteous address ; are rude to brutality in their .'ames
and their speech is replete with slan^, profanity, and'
.filth. A lialf, or even quarter-likeness to this typo of
nascent manhood is, of all things, least desirable ibr oi r
girl-c nld. FA.r her sake, then, if for no other reason
would it not bo a shrewd measure to make our little lads'
—if not " half-girls "—yet enough like them in gentle-
ness of demeanour to one another, and in cleanliness of
tongue to become their sisters' companions in sport and
talk ? ^

The dissociation of the sexes, by the time school-life
begins, IS pregnant with hurtful inliuences to both "As
coarse and rough as a boy " is the girl's condemnation of
an over-lively mate, while the bov insults the school-
tellow less adventurous than himself by declaring him to
be "as hly-livere.i as a girl." T would have our bovs
pure and modest, our girls biave. If the early prac-
tical effect of the system of sisterly or neighbi urly inter-
course IS to make Willie ashraued of his dirty liands and
trowzleil hair, and Jack's freckled face to colour beet-red
when the oath or ribald word nearly escapes his ton<^ue
it is a promising experiment. To Mamie it will open a
new world of interest and delight. She is safer and
assuredly happier, paddling with bared feet in the
sun-warmed brook, or sitting on tlie bank catchincr min-
nows, or tramping the meadows in quest of partridoe-
nests, or building forts,— stone in summer, snow in wm-
ter,— or taking her part in the sham-fights before and
behind the redoubt, than when closeted with her bosom-
friend, to exchange thrilling confidenees abonf. f!n-+ii-"
ana gowns in esse and in posse : the last squabble with

HANDICAPPED.

the soul-sister's imniediato pn^decessor, and tlio "nice
fellows " who are reported to have pronounced the palpi-
tating pair to bo "just pe -fectly lovely."
^ We «m in allowing,' the fears, hopes and flutters of
nubility to obtrude, even ir» imagination, upon this most
susceptible stages of the formative period. There is vul-
gar violence in the excitation of cov tremors and cocjuet-
tish projects in the mind of one who is as yet incapable
of comprehending the meaning or tendency of tho novel
emotions. It is not merely shaking Lho dew from tho
rose-bud, but tearing the delioate involutions apart to let
in the sunshine upon the guarded, immature heart. Pre-
mature bloom is imperfection, too often deformity,
torced fruits lack the flavour of the sunnner's prime, tho
beauty and richness of seanonableiiesfi.

" I was merry, I was merry.
When my litU, j, .r came,
With a lib iieheny.
Or sou.,. I ttiw-in vented game."

So we, who were girls thirty years since, used to sing.

With such sinless offerings let our boys invite their
gnl-chums to frolic and fun, unalloyed by dreams of
growth or chanrv. No tone in Nature's music is sweeter
than a child's laugh,— the gush of a stream that gurgles
because it has no depths, no sullen pools, or foamin-r
rapids. It IS an offence to taste and feeling, Avhen, like
a dam built within the bed of the brook, our child b. gins
to long for a woman's name and triumphs. Grace and
naturalness take flight hand in hand. Frankness is ex-
changed tor slyness; the pure straightforwardness wf the
look for side-long glances ; the musical laugh for a sim-
per. The unripe peach begins to blush outwardly and to
toughen within. Our girl grows suddenly diplomatic ;
lays plans for varying her walk to school that she may,
accidentally, on purpose, meet the boys on their way to
tiie Aeadcnr, ; names apple-seeds, and tosses the rind
into fortuitous hieroglyphics; counts a hundred white

,, ^

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i-n

f 1 ..

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HANDICAPPED.

horses in the street, sticks "merry thoughts " above the
W^door.and puts bits of wfddingfcake under he'

" ^n°,F'"^ ^" '^'■«an"'? ™y *™« love to see,-

sur^esi ''""^^''^ ""'^'^ ^'^^^^°^ *^" desecration is the
" ^^/^do not give my children innocent cleasure^ pf
home, they will seek objectionable amusements abroad ''
said a sagacious parent whpn censured for allowin" danc-
ing and bilhard-playing in his own house. *=

, invite the boysfrankly to "come and play with mv littlp
girls,' and encourage such forms of diversLras Jhev r«n

cSs'SClikrT ''"^f^"^'' chrdetSing"
circles, and the hke pretty imitations of the amusements
of their elders, that shall mingle both sexes T^thnZT
ci ing sheepishness on one sid? or coquet'^orthe other"
As for the words, " courtship and marriage," " let them not
be so much as named among them "

Content is best taught to average human beings bv

TrrnTt^ Too " ^'^^^r ''r^ ^^ circumstan Tw^S
permit. Too many good people-even parents -consider
their duty done in this line when they have assured their
children several hundred times thof +h^ i.,^ • f
is tke^itHe children's) Nor^ttVea , X^^^^^^
ponsibihties, trials, losses, affliction,-a bllck cltaWue"
that uckily does not daunt the i^orant httlp 3?
into dread of the Future which th f aTstre mus be an
improvement upon their present c^ondlt on Contrary
rea oning is wi hout avail. It is better to rendei tS
daily hves and lot so pleasant that they will nofcare to
look forward eagerly to untried scenes, unproved duties
,J'l^'^^'^'^^^\^f^^oiding ennui now, anTa still more
valuable means of securing for your daughter comfort and

rhttmTi".r'7T 'r^'T' ^^^--^tTTeaJh W
mat time i. picciuus to herself and to others. Assign to

HANDICAPPED,

ition is the

her stated duties, and appoint certain hours for the per-
formance of these. The happy-go-lucky customs of many
households reputed to be well-regulated, have laid broad
the foundation of the proverbially unbusiness-like habits
of woman. Work, which may be done at any time, and
diligently or leisurely at will, is not apt to command a
respectable market-price.

A house-mother in easy circumstances complained to
me : —

" I never find time to read a book, or to make a visit.
1 am busy all day, and tired at night. Yet I never ac-
complish anything worth considering. A woman's is an
aimless, useless existence."

" You sew a great deal, probably ? " said I, sympathiz-

" I never take a needle in my hand. My seamstress
even darns the children's stockings and mine. "

" You give much personal attention to cookery, then ? "
I suggested as another solution of the puzzle.

" On the contrary, I have no taste for it ; and, after the
morning visits of inspection, I seldom enter the kitchen
during the twenty-four hours. Yet I am not idle, and
certainly allow myoelf no time for rest, as the country peo-
ple would say I just 'potter around."

Do not let Mamie learn to "potter " or dawdle. If her
morning task be nathing more arduous* than the dusting
of her bed-room furniture and the care of her wash-stand,
see that all this is done promptly and deftly. She should
dust each chair-round and door-panel, as if serious issues
depended upon the accomplishment of the business within
a given time. Of course, being a child, she will be tempted
to dally about her work ; to drop down into the chair to
chat, or to read, or to dream for "just one second." She
will think it of " no consequence " whether the towels
hang straight or crooked upon the rack, and four morn-
ings out of seven she will neglect to wash the soap-cup.
(If when on a visit you have a curiosity to know whether

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HANDICAPPED.

fi! ! I

Img IS prone to overlook it) ^ oest Jure-

f 13 nJ!r,T^ ^'^^"^ ^^^. ^''^^"^ ^^^ l^»«bancls and neiXboufs

f i under the pressure of " belittling cares • " si^h^ Vw

and executed as Business ^°''^^^ "P°"

Mrs. Garfield, the true and worthy wife of onp nf fT..

triumph. I ^»d Zefttog'liL S Z'^th" T° '".'^ 'P'"' »

It seemed Ute »n Mp'irSOT anTrt. .P?*",' b"?"' '•"n -i^ke!'
The very .,m.hi„, Zmedflo'wta^ d„Z th° ,"V''° «"". ""'s'""--

W. to Ve beeome fS,V":1„rS\^red^rbr&S;k^^

HANDICAPPED.

slave of toil, but its regal master, making whatever I do yield me its
best fruits. You have been king of your work so long that may be
you will laugh at me for having lived so long without my crown,
but I am too glad to have found it at all to be entirely disconcerted
even by your merriment. Now, I wonder if right here does not lie
the ' terrible wrong,' or at least some of it, of which the women
suffragists complain. The wrongly educated woman thinks her
duties a disgrace, and frets under them or shirks them if she can.
She sees man triumphantly pursuing his vocations, and thinks it is
the kind of work he does which makes him granc^ and regnant ;
whereas it is not the kind of work at all, but the way 'n which and
the spirit with which he does it ."

Mamio v ever quick-witted, is, at eight or ten years
ofage. ( : . . ble to enter into the spirit of this extract.
She may, also, take in something of the inspiration of the
idea that if she makes Work noble. Work will ennoble her.
To dignify the '| trivial round, the common task " is an
easier undertaking now than when woman's work was
hard and monotonous toil. Neatness and beauty, elegance
and economy are readily persuaded to dwell in cottage-
homes. Mamie must be encouraged to make her room
first clean, then pretty, as a natural following of plan and
improvement. Wild-flowers are no longer weeds ; birds'
nests, moss and gnarled boughs are nesthetic ornaments.
A few yards of cheap, sheer muslin, draping the frame of
her looking-glass, cushions covered with Turkey red on
chairs and floor, Christmas cards, clever wood-cuts from
illustrated weeklies and photographs, tacked on doors and
walls, with Mamie's own books on hanging shelves or
other neat case — make a possessed Paradise to the occu-
pant of the chamber, a goodly show to other eyes. Make
over the domain to her, to have and to hold, as completely
as the rest of the house belongs to you. So long as it is
clean and orderly, neither housemaid nor elder sister
should interfere with her sovereignty.

Am I dignifying above measure the commonplace de-
tails, the very plain prose of every-day housekeeping ?
It is my steadfast belief that if there is >any ground for
the popular opinion of woman's general incapacity for

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FANDICAPPED.

"business," including the control of her own and her

etfenv^S^ t T '"" 'l^ inexperience in own-
ersnip oi any kind whatsoever. From her birth fn h^r-

marmge-day an irresponsible, penniless pTt, Es likely
—with intentions that would Lnour an ancrT t!.},„!i^
?er perhaps to ruin, her husband ^^^^^^-to ham-

fire andTaw^h 1 1 '^f ^? ^indhn^-wood for the kitchen-
otherhbouir his lawful wages from Papa as would any
oonei laoouiei. Mamie comes down to breakfast a^ an^
as the morning, her hair bound with a blue ribbon tffi

First, she is glad that she is pretty, not only because it
lookf In l" -""i . ^\^^'y "^^^^"1 ^o Preserve her ^ood

sperjhriKfrreT^i^^xreirL^r

P&a tlo c»ten^ Hi;r,rr rv^i^^p^--

HANDICAPPED.

ihought to the dissimilarity of your girls' habits in this
particular ? Ever asking yourself or them why they
elect to carry their money in a pocket book or purse, and
seldom go out of the house without it ?

The whole system of the different education ox boys
and girls with respect to making, keeping, and spending
money is pernicious, yet fearfully consistent in all its sec-
tions, from the cradle to the tomb, of her whom the laws
of most of our States hold as a minor in perpetuity.

Set a reasonable value, then, on Mamie's work and let
her have what she earns. Pay her for picking berries,
hemming towels, shelling peas, and dozens of other small
tasks, stipulating that they must be done well and " on
time ; " as her ability and industry increase, advance her
wages. Give her practical lessons in the righteousness
of fair and honest transactions by your own equitable
dealing. Let her make out her bills, keep her own
accounts, and never impress her with the belief that she
is a dependent upon you for aught save love aT'd care.
There is no more effectual way of teaching her to play
the interested toady, to truckle to you or to her father,
in servile covetousness when she wants money.

Multitudes of women hold, with Becky Sharp — envious
of the prosperity of the Pitt Crawleys — that they could
be very good on five thousand pounds a year. The pro-
bability is that they would be more upright in thought
and conduct if their supply of pin-money were not con-
tingent upon the convenience, which often mears caprice,
of their legal masters. Every woman and every girl has
a right to be, in a certain sense and degree, independent ,
at any rate, to the extent of holding her little all in her
own name and hands.

The way to learn how to work is to work. In order to
understand how to manage funds one must have funds to
manage.

It is domestic bribery and corruption to recompense
your girl in money for being pretty or well-behaved or

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HANDICAPPED.

sweet-tempered. She should early be made to feel that
the price of spiritual graces i& not to be told in dollars
and cents, and to be modestly grateful to the Giver of all
good for what share of personal charms has fallen to her
lot. fehe begins to sink toward the level of the demi-
monde m learning to regard these last as a source of
selhsh gams, to calculate an '■ traffic upon her attractions
tohe can not be instructed too soon in the great truth
that care of her body-of its purity, health, and strength
—IS a duty she owes to herself, to her kind, and to God

^i««

• • S|

CHAPTER V.

REVERENCE OF SEX.
Bex.'-c!^'HSLAMB" ^' "^*" ^"^^* ^"«^° Winatanley, to reverence her

It is an uncommon event to meet a woman, who, if put
mto the confessional of conscience, would not own that at
some period of her life, she had wished she had been born
a boy. liut an immense majority of the best thinkers
and workers of our sex would aver more freely that thev
would not e::change places with their brothers.

bo far from being ashamed of their place in the world
tJiey are too sensible of the responsibility laid by it upon
them to crave another field of action which is, after all
really no wider or higher.

Still the healthy, frolicsome little girl, treated of in
our ast chapter, finds out, of and for herself, the force of
baylord Clarke s matter-of-fact man's reply tothestron^-
knowled e "'"^'' upon woman's right to ascend the tree of

clothls™"'^'^ '^ ^^^ climbers. Mostly on account of they

Mamie " hates " to wear gloves and wide-brimmed hats
and to be reminded continually that it is not "lady-like"
to swing on gates and ride horses to water, or to shout

S^i^u ""T T^^' ^^^ ^""^^ 0^ ra^i-bles and tops and
toot-ball, and when shamed and pulled out of ring and
piay-ground by her brothers, testifies to her femininity by
a passionate flood of tears and an outcry against the

• til

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REVEEENCE OF SEX.

i!!»ll

i! I'"'

tyranny of gender. To every mother, wise or simple, the
sight of this discontent, which is apt to ripen into open
rebellion, must suggest serious misgivings.

" If these things be dor- 3 in a green tree, what shall be
done in a dry ? "

The sooner and more thorougldy your child's mind is
disabused of the low-caste contempt of her womanhood,
the happier for her, the more promising for the next gener-
ation. Begin, by the time she can understand stories of
heroic and valorous deeds, to tell her what Woman has
done for humanity and Avhat .she inay do in the future.
Forecasting the inevitable night of tare-sowing and the
up-springing of the noxious weeds of evil fancies and
false shame, teach her, in a thousand ingenious ways, the
significance of the inspired words : " The Temple of the

Body.

I thanked God, and took courage when I saw that, in
the Revised Version of the New Testament, the term "vile
body" is rendered " body of our humiliation," the phrase
being antithetical to " the body of His glory."

It is a disgrace to our civilization that, whereas woman's
need of physiological knowledge is pre-eminent — (essen-
tial — the unprejudiced thinker and observer would de-
clare) — the practical study of Uv laws of anatomy and
hygiene has been, until recently, confined to medical
schools. Even now, as in generations past, the chief foes
to the acquisition of such information are women them-
selves. It will not be nice work, but, before going further,
let us scrape bare the roots of this rank offence against
ourselves and our race.

It begins very far down and back. Three-year-old
Mamie, dl of excited questionings as to " where baby-
brother came from," is told that the doctor brought him
in his pocket ; that he was dug up out of the parsley-
bed ; that a stork flew in at the window with him in his
mouth ; that he was picked up from the door-step, or a
dozen other lies that quiet natural curiosity for awhile.

* PL

REVERENCE OF SEX.

Two or three years later she detects her mother in the
furtive preparation of tiny frocks and embroidered flan-
nels, and asks, " for whom ? "

-, " F^F ^^^^ P^°^" ^fl-bies at the orphan asylum," answers
Christian Mamma, without a twinge, except regret at her
own carelessness that has so nearly betrayed the secret.

One morning Mamie is summoned to 'the nursery to
welcome a new occupant of the crib from which " little
brother " was transferred last week to a " real bed." The
plump, (lowny nestling is clad in a slip and double-gown
which his sister recognises directly. She raises rebuking,
innocent eyes :

" Mamma ! i/oii didn't tell me the truth ! "

The mother may laugh off the reproof, or offer other
ingenious falsehoods in extenuation of the first. Most
probably she says then what is sure to come, sooner or
later—" Little girls must not talk of such things. It is
not proper. Never let me hear of your doing it again ! "

At ten, Mamie persecutes parent and discreet nurse no
longer. At thirteen, she evades knowingly such shy
queries as the mother — whose hand set the first stone of
the division-wall between them, now more than breast
high— feels it her duty to put about Mamie's own aches
and odd feelings. Servants and school-mates have ini-
tiated her into the mysteries of her, as yet, undeveloped
being, and by their manner of doing it, made a foul secret
of that which is, in truth, her dower, bearing the seal of
the Divine Father. The mother has been recreant to her
trust, through false delicacy or cowardice. If she could
bear the consequences alone, our pity and reprobation
would be less deep. But instead of eliminating she has
planted evil ; has made her child's load heavier in place
of lifting it.

The like criminal reserve prevails on the subject of the
general functions of the body. The child ne\^er thinks of
reporting irregularities of the digestive and kindred or-
gans, or of attaching consequence to these in her own

i ill

iff

REVERENCE OF SEX.

l'\

mind. The chances are ten to one if she so much as
knows tliat she hfis kidneys and liver, — ten thousand
against one that she is ignorant of their position and
ofHces. " Stomach " is her generic name for the abdomi-
nal region in its depth and breadth ; " ba<k " for the
entire length of the spinal colunm. Heart, lungs and
bronchial tubes are interchangeable terms when she at-
tempts to define the position of any disorder in the cavity
above the diaphragm, and she does not know her hips
from her thighs. Still more misty are her ideas of the
cause of the divers bodily inconveniences she endures.
She is terrified by a sharp stitch in " the heart," which
proves to be an attack of colic; mistakes dumb nausea
lor a threatening swoon ; can not find the pulse in her
own wrist, and would resent as " perfectly horrid " the
intimation that the queer swimming in her brain, occa-
sioned, she imagines, by excessive study, bears the same
relation to constijmtion that the stagnation of waters at
the head of a sewer does to the obstruction at its mouth.
I have known girls, and matrons old enough to be
grandmothers, who pushed ignorant complacency to the
fatuity of boasting that the calls of Nature upon them
averaged but one or two demands per week. They found
it " a great convenience and sustained no real injury from
the infrequency of the habit."

Mamie's breath is bad. Mamma remarks, sometimes, and
sends the child to brush her teeth with charcoal paste and
wash her mouth thoroughly with myrrh-and-water, in-
stead of questioning narrowly with what stuff she has been
outraging her stomach, and whether in the matter of drain-
pipes the exquisitely-delicate machine is in perfect work-
ing order. Nature scorns the use of patent gas-traps ;
yet kindness blends with justice, in her exposure of wrong-
doing, the flagrant defiance of her governmental ordin-
ances.

T am amazed manj^ times a year, at the crass ignorance
of otherwise intelligent people, of the body, its operations,

UEVERENCE OF SEX.

G.')

i 1'

maladies and the methods of regulating these. One of my
children was once taken suddenly ill atacounfry hotel
where we were passing the summJr. It was late at night ;
we were far from town and the doctor, and my husband
was absent, I consulted the landlady, u "smart" mo-
therly body, who told m.' she had " doctorod " in her own
family for twenty years, and with success. The little one
was m a high fever ; his breath was quick and distress-
mgly broken by acute pain in the riglit lung—" like
knife," he sobbed, "right under the shoulder." ""il? had no
headache and no nausea. His sister reported that h.> had
sat down, that afternooon, on the grass, while heated with
play. There had been a mountain shower at mid-day and
the turf was wet.

"He's eaten something that's disagreed with him " pro-
nounced the worthy hostess. " That's generally wh'at ails
children. I'll just fetch up the fennel brandy. That'll
brmg him around all right."

While we discu.ssed the symptoms, an elderly gentle-
man, who had been all around the world and us*ed his
eyes and ears rationally, knocked at the door to offer a
bottle of cholera medicine, compounded accordincr to a
]irescription he had obtained in Bombay. The next visi-
tor to the sick-room was a pretty mother from the city
who " always gave paregoric whatever was the matter
with her three babies." A Bostonian had like faith in a
cloth wet with Pound's Extract of Witch Hazel, and bound
over the affected part. One and all looked doubtful
when I, persisting in the belief that the patient was
threatened with pleurisy, called for a hot foot-bath with
a handful of mustard stirred in, and applied an Indian-
meal-and-pepper poultice to the seat of the knife-like
pain.

^ A physician was sent for, but did not arrive until nine
clock next morning. Bv tliat time fever and Kuffcrin<T
had passed off in gentle perspiration, the child had slept
quietly for several hours and awakened convalescent.

- -I

REVEIIENCE OF SEX.

I-

"All the better for the iv;:rular practitioners," .said the
man of healing, when I quoted the dia<,'no.seH and advice
with which I had been favoured. " When mothers un-
derstand their children's ailments, and how to remove
them, three-fourths of our occupatitm will bo gone."

I honour the regular profe.ssion from the depths of a
grateful heart. All the .same I was tliiiikful for the very
little knowledge that held me back from heightening my
boy's fever by administering brandy and astringents anil
confounding the pleura with the abdomen.

The pseudo delicacy that drives the pure-hearted child
away from the one that .should be her contidante and
teacher, to the prurient whisperings of the scliool-fellow
who stays all night with her almost every week, or the
vulgar gossiping of servant girls, is no new idiosyncracy of
well-meaning mothers. Scruples and habits have come
down to them (again) " by ordinary generation." They
bear date of the artless .shepherdess and Laura-Matilda
age. My maternal grandmother (rest her sweet soul !) set
down her only daughter at fourteen to read aloud to her
the entrancing histories of Clarissa and Pamela, pages
sown thick with seduction and abduction, while the
listener composedly netted cobweb lace and tamboured
bed-hangings preserved unto this day as marvels of dainty
handiwork. Yet this true and loving gentlewoman never
lisped to the growing girl a word relative to the perils
incident to her sex and age, and when the crisis arrived,
alluded to it distantly, as " one of the things which, as
Holy Writ informs us, are not convenient to be spoken
of"

Hundreds of girls were killed every year by their frantic
resort to cold baths and cognate appliances, in the height
of their terror and mortification at the appearance of the
detested yet unknown enemy of their personal comfort.
Thousands lingered through lives which were " nothing
but a eontiriucd death," to transmit to their children tiio
infirmities fixed upon themselves by neglect and mistaken

REVERENCE OF SEX.

modesty. Those arc not exporioncos of which women
like to talk even to intimate friends of their own sex.
Yet 1 could verify each of tho assertions I have just
made, by storii's of agony, mov., . ■■ less heroically borne;
of bodius warped by tortun ; of s.> ttered intellects; of
blighted hopes; — a record t la'. ouglii 'o make men won-
der and women blush at th.- u wittin,' barbarity of ten-
der mothers, the pfrsecution virh sneer and scoff, of
shriaking, tender girls, shame., and baited by those of
their own sex.

The wrong was horrihle — monstrous! Those who arc
now middle-aged women reaped the reward of their pa-
rents' mistake hi a harvest of " peculiar" maladies that
terrified sufferers and observers into a spasm of common
sense. Tho llepresentative American woman of tho pe-
riod comprised between '4.') and '75, siiould be painted
with her hand on tho lumbar region, eyes hollowed and
complexion chlorotic. Frohtpsus uleri became almost as
common as toothache, and the fearfid disease was not
confined to married women. Science, aroused and un-
willing to aihuit itself at a loss to account for the pre-
vailing evil, assailed existing follies of dress, sedentary
habits, late hours, excessive dancing, as the cimmlative
cause of the mischief. The women of the day vero hold
responsilde for their own sufferings. It was assumed
that each had begun her existence with a flawless consti-
tution, and that patient, long-suffering and ever-recupev-
ative Nature had been outraged and alienated by the
diseased woman's individual iniquity. To point the
moral of feminine decadence, writers and speakers in-
voked the ghosts of our hale, busy grandmothers. These
being dead told no tales, and the wan-faced sisterhood
held on their painful pilgrimage, convicted, if not con-
vinced. As Eve's Daughters, multiplication of sorrow
was their heritage ; — thus ran the general reasoning. If
one escaped tlio doom, it was By accident.

I ^ i

Iff

-rriar'ir.

REVERENCE OF SEX.

Few were clear-eyed or cool enough to see and to de-
clare that the degeneration was not the work of one
or two cycles, or to lament, with our shrewd Autocrat,
that the right man was not sent for in the seventeenth
ceni/ury.

I, for one, am weary to disgust, of the prating of su-
perficial scientist and conceited ignoramus of the deeds
and ways of our sound grandmothers. The average of
woman's life is longer now than it was a century "ago.
Our girls would be more healthy than were their grand-
mothers or great-grandmothers of Mrs. Delaney's time,
were it not for the legacy of proclivities and well-devel-
oped maladies bequeathed by those worthies. Else the
march of medical science is a myth, the bustling array of
surgical instruments, the parade of preventives and cura-
tives^^ sadly familiar to us all, a mere show of " Quaker
guns" in the face of the enemy.

It is necessary, in your survey of Mamie's chances of
health and longevity, that you should review this dark
history. It may be— which, may Heaven forbid !— that
you, my sister, can read the story much more distinctly
than can I, because you scan it in the electric light of
experience. You may find in your own body the witness
that these things are true. If so, there is the more reason
why you should lose no time in correcting the marred
work which is but too l:"kely to show itself in your off-
spring.

One rule should be absolute in every home. The mother
should keep her daughter with, and near, her until the
turning-point between childhood and girlhood is safely
passed and regularity of habits is established. When
Mamie approaches you with the inevitable— and, I sub-
mit, perfectly natural and proper— questionings about the
Unknown Country peopled by unborn infants, tell h. i-
thi t God sends them to the earth in charge of His holy
angels ; that since babes must have fathers to work for
them abroad, and mothers to tend them at home, He writs

r 1

REVERENCE OF SEX.

until after marriage before He gives them. Say it so
simply and solemnly as to calm curiosity. As seriously
and frankly, take her into your confidence befo. a the
advent that occurs when she is six to ten years of age.

A modest, sensible woman once told me how she satis-
fied her little girl's inquiry, " How do you know that GoD
is going to give us another baby ? "

" I told her," said the wise mother, " that since the wee
darling must be fed with proper food so soon as it is born,
our Heavenly Father prepares in advance the bosom of
the mother to furnish it. She, becoming conscious of this
provision, knows of the blessing in store for her, and
makes ready the clothing that will be required."

A child who is accustomed to be treated as a rational
being will receive this truthful — if partial — statement in
good faith, and be the more ready to obey your oft-urged
injunction that she will come to you with all such ques-
tions and perplexities, instead of discussing them with
ignorant servants, who can not instruct her properly, or
with wicked school-children who will practise upon her
credulity and make her imagination as foul as are theirs.
Prepare the way, meanwhile, for further and fuller know-
ledge, by teaching her the sanctity and value of her own
body in all its parts. Give nursery lectures to extremely
select audiences, talking easily and plainly of the ofiices
of the various organs and secretions. Your daughters will
soon understand that to eat indigestible food is sinful for
other reasons than because you have forbidden the indul-
gence and that constipation is unclean ; that the bath is
a means of grace in keeping the pores from getting clogged
with impure exudations, which, if turned in upon the
system, breed ill-health and ill-temper ; that exercise in
the open air sets the blood in lively circulation, and
plenty of sleep renews the cellular tissues rapidly expend-
ed by growing children. Lead on thus in wisdom and
purity through the alphabet of physiology. Be tactful in
all that you impart, squeamish in nothing.

i '. '

wmm

KEVEEENCE OF SEX.

ii^'

j ■

^ In a word, tell her " why." As she gains in years and
intelligence, go further into the mystery of Life.' Get some
good familiar treatise upon Botany.-I know of none
better than Gray's " Iiow Plants Grow,"-and read with
her of the beautiful laws of fructification and reproduc-
tion. Her mmd thus prepared will adopt, without shock
to belief or modesty, the analogy between plant-growth
and human propagation, will recognise in the influence of
the tallen pollen, or prolific powder, upon the stigma of
the flower, resemblance to the effect wrought by such
aftectionate intimacy of the sexes, the living and lovin^
together in one home, the heart-garden, as is exhibited in
the continual companionship of husband and wife The
thoughtful student of vegetable life needs no elaborate
J^rench treatise— a tissue fine-drawn into fanciful tenuity
-upon the "Loves of Flowers," to teach him the beautiful
truth that they do thus woo, and love, and enjoy

As a successive step in your physiological and "botani-
cal analogies, and a firm platform for your feet, impress
upon your pupil the force of this one of Dr. Clarke's
axioms : —

"No organ or function in plant, animal, or human
kind, can be properly regarded as a disability or source
of weakness. Through ignorance or misdirection it may
mat or enfeeble the animal or being that misguides it •
but rightly guided and developed, it is either in itself a
source of power and grace to its pare-t stock, or a neces-
sary stage in the development of larger grace and power"
+ ? .i''^.^°"'' S^\^^^^ f'-^^t to this cardinal truth, say
to her that God in the beginning created man male and
temaie. If you can not easily obtain a few anatomical
plates showing the shape and relative position of the
principal organs of the woman's body, explain these as
clearly as you can in words. Tell her that on either side
ot a small sac, which is the womb, is an oval gland known
to anatomists as an " ovary." That each nf thc^e two
glands holds a certain number of minute vesicles which

REVERENCE OF SEX.

in the due and regular course of a healthy girl's life —
usually about the age of fourteen in temperate climates
— are matured and separated from the ovary, one every
four or five weeks. That the re At of this (always nat-
ural) ripening and separation is a periodical flow, called
the menses. Do not be afraid to say to her when ycu
have thus trained and prepai-ed her to receive the com-
munication, that these vesicles are ova, — eggs in the ani-
mal, seed in the plant, — and that from these, by some
mysterious law of the loving oneness of tlie married
state, are evolved ihe germs of living human beings.
That thus children become in a wedlock blessed and hon-
oured by God.

This is the plain truth — and all of it ;

What a thing of purity is it beside the trickeries of
ribald-mongers, the meretricious maunder! ngs of sensa-
tional fiction ; the phantoms created in the imaginations
of timid school-children by hints and douhle-entendre,
and midnight confabulation upon themes which any girl
who cherishes a spark of moral decency would blush to
speak of by daylight !

Bring your daughter face to face with the serious dig-
nity of the revelation, and you ncad not fear lest she will
ever make it the theme of unseemly jests. The know-
ledge thus imparted will become to her a sacred trust.

I quote, with pleasure, in this connection, a strong,
pertinent paragraph from one of our leading journals* :

" The regards with ' feelings akin to horror,'

the proposal made in Scrihner's Monthly that girls should
be taught physiology complete at schools, instead of be-
ing educated in ignorance of knowledge M-jcessary to the
health and well-being of every woman living in an arti-
ficial civilized society. Plainly, the fools are not all dead
yet.

" Knowledge never yet destroyed delicacy ; ignorance
does and much else — health, life, and character."

U li ■' I

Spriiiffficld Republkan, March 6th, 1881.

mmm

REVERENCE OF SEX.

t ;i

There IS .ne quintessence of a powerful moral and phv-
siological treatise in the two concluding lines MI

lZZ\7, """' '"''""^'^ ''"PP^^^^« ^ P^«t"^«^ commentary
dated thirty years agone-a time very close to the thresl^^

motlls '^ ^'^' '' °"^- ^^^^^"^ honest gran l-

n sohinU ^^'y^'^^^^Sy-even ^.^-complete-was a novelty
in schools then, anu an nuiovation at which most parents
■ and guardians looked askance. In one Young LadTes'
Seminary a teacher of advan. " .aws effected a bold de-
parture from ancient customs by the introduction of an
expurgated text-book on the irnportant topic That Tt
was very expurgated I gathered from glandng over the
volume wule waiting for an audience with the'teacher [n
ho lecrtation-room one morning, the class being in ses-
sion. There we-e ten young ladies in line of recitation
their ages varying from fiiteen to eighteen, Thev weie'
summoned as the " Senior Class in Physiology " iL ei
amination was prosy for a while, consisting " of pointed

llT. 'r%r'^";""^ ^^^ ^^P*^^'^- *^^««« belng^orrect, but

istless. Then o a girl of sixteen, sitting midway down

the row of pupils, came a test example. A chalk sketch

?advt: 'm. r^ "P°" '^^ hl.o}.hLa^ anfthi^ young
lady was told to designate and name the various parts of
the human frame. She stepped forward, a light sS fn
hand, and touching each part in naming it, b^'egan at the
cranium with " as fronfis," " os occiputr supplying eT-
ish and Latm terms fluently and intelligently.^ ' The
vnlf '"-'.wr'^ '°'"P^r ^*^^' ^"^^"••^Pti"^ her at inter!
vals with the request that she would mention the specific
rtsMpf'?;; thatorgan. As the pupil neared the lower

W intPlW ? '^^'r* ^^^ disagreeable smile on the
least intellectual countenance before me. The owner
nudged her neighbours at the right and left, and the

^,V' ' Tn' *^' ""conscious girl pronounced " the pel-
ms, B^UUev, suppreased only to explode in a laugh, drew
her attention to the scene behind her. Every one of heT

REVERENCE OF SEX.

.73

fellows was smiling or giggling, some under cover of books
opened to hide their blushes, some overtly in malicious
amusement. The teacher rapped on her desk and cried
" Order ! " The pupil essayed to proceed ; reiterated the
unlucky word, voice trembling, cheeks burning, and eyes
full of indignant tears. There was a second and more
offensive titter. She dropped the rod, threw both hands
before her face, and rushed from the room.

Within a decade I have had a report of a lecture deliv-
ered by the fifty-year-old spinster professor of Physiology
in a Woman's College, in which the members of the class
were informed that should any one of them wish to retire
before the discussion of the nex( subject in order, oppor-
tunity would be afforded in which she could make her
escape. The teacher regretted — sincerely deplored — the
necessity laid upon herself to allude, however distan!;ly,
to a topic fraught with peculiar delicacy. She could not
blame any young lady who might shun the lesson of the
hour. It was very, very disagreeable. The subject was
that treated of in this work under the title, " The Ryth-
mic Check."

Scruples and scenes such as these are the product of
the 5Wcw!i-modesty~which we, in our honest wrath, brand
as lewd squeamishness — of an era scourged by diseases
that were the direct outcome of " ignorance of knowledge
necessary to the health and well-being of every woman
living in an artificial civilized society." An age that held
the aummum feowum of woman's purity to be the compla-
cent contemplation of herself as an ultra-cherubic crea-
tion—all head, shoulders, arms, jiands, and feet, with a
sublimated indication of " figure " — was quite sure fo be-
queath to the generation following such forms oi what
the author of " Enigmas of Life " writes down " damnosa
hereditaa," as should keep daughters and grand-daughters
humble and mindful of every section of their^misfitted
frames.

-^■u'diirir/

mjmli

EEVERENCE OF SEX.

Seize the opportunity, while yoixv better in&tnicted
girl IS intent upon the study of this new huf in self
acquaintanceship, to awak^^n in her the >-emo of personal
accountabihty to her sex and to those wh<., &hall stand
ahve upon the earth in later days tha. yours or lev,.
WJm,;.. i upper, at the date when expurgated v/orks upon
Phya. :>i.ogy were a trifle strong for the taste of educated
young .adie-, advised Ooelebs, in his choice of a wife to
be mnmi.i oi ■ th^m whom the Lord shall ;.ive thee of
her, thcTc v/a^ a siiuddering shriek of deprecation from
decorous mothers and marriageable daughters at the
hornd indelicacy of the suggestion. If tho testimony
ot these 18 to be received, the faith of Abraham who
when he was called, went out. not knowing whither he
went, was a will-o -the-wisp by contrast with the bright
shming trust of the young girl who is led, by way of the
marriage altar, to " that new world which is the old"
In every instance this is childish farrago. In many cases
the husband hnds the unsophisticated angel, whose ima-
gination he believed to be unsmirched as new-fallen snow
as well-versed m the lore and phraseology of "inconve'
nient things " as is he who does not affect to deny the"
ownership of gamers bursting with harvested wild oats
bince your girl will and must ponder and lay up in her
heart what she has learned, direct her thoughts into the
right channel. Set before her a pure ambition instead of
leaving her to worse than idle dreams

Mrs. Lelia G. Bedell, of Chicago, an eminent physician
and writer upon the subtlest of physiological mysteries
has this striking passage in one of her letters to me • '
l^re-natal influences (or what are generally imolied by
this expression) are of vital importance, but " vastlv
surpassed by the value of proper influences of ^ anr^

environment all the way from the cradh- of i\ -. boy and
girl babies unt i ■ ey have ceased their f-acti^.s L pa-

REVERENCE OF SEX.

"The foetus in utero is not more susceptible to influ-
ences than the separate cells of which it is formed in the
separate generative glands of both parents throughout
their entire lives.

" Herein is True Heredity."

The imagination hesitates to grasp the full import of
this saying. Yet what does it teach us that we did not
know already— at least, in part ? That none of us liveth
unto himself and none of us dieth unto himself. That
your child, in the neglect of her commonest duty, risks
the comfort of others. That the invisible, but potential
moral and spiritual "sphere" of influence is not a mystic's
dream. That in moulding ourselves we are building for
Time and for Eternity. The inspired prophecy touSiing
the "idle word" takes an intenser meaning when read by
this lamp — as does the thought that projects the word. *

The destinies of the races who shall people the globe
in the year of Our Lord 1950 are held by the boys and
girls of To-Day— pre-eminently by the latter.

" I care not who makes the laws of a country if I may
write the songs," said one who had studied Natures and
Man to good purpose.

You, the mother of a living child, may take up the boast
in spirit, if not in word :

" I care not who may deposit the ballots at the polls if
I may but bear and rear the voters, may train the voters'
wives and mothers ! "

♦j!

V.L

! !'-

CHAPTER VI.

THE FIRST TUENING-POINT.

" Pepper helps a man on his horse, but a woman into her crrave."-
man Folk-Saijiwj.

-Oer-

All climaterics are attended with more or less peril.
The transition period in religion, government, or indi-
vidual, is one which calls for wisest care and vigilance.

If there are dormant seeds of disease in your daughter's
constitution, they will probably spring up under the con-
ditions that bring about the first budding of womanhood.
For some months prior to the positive appearance of signs
which indicate that she has reached the first t-uning-
point in her physical life, your watchful eye recognises
the heralds of the change. Nervous disorders, to which
she is a stranger, terrify her and make you uneasy. Her
grandmother's headaches— a tradition of dread in the
family— have leaped a generation to fall, an unexpected
curse, upon the descendant whose resemblance to that
honoured woman has, until now, been your pride. Mamie
ha^ morbid cravings of appetite, and suffers after eating
things that never disagreed with her before. She is hys-
terical upon insufficient provocation. Her father and bro-
thers are impatient with her babyish tears and attacks of
" temper-ache ; " laugh at her lackadaisical ways. The
boys protest loudly that she is " no fellow at all, since she
has taken to moaning and moping." If her tastes are
literar3|, she composes low-spirited verses on the back-
porch, in moonlight promenades or while roaming the

THE FIRST TURNING-POINT.

fields at sunset, and writes them out on tea-blistered pages,
when she ought to be in bed/ However sensible she may
be naturally, she inclines now to sentimentality and the
belief that she is not " appreciated." Or, she systemati-
cally depreciates herself— a more occult phase of vanity.
She was " put into the world to fill up a chink," she la-
ments to her dearest friend, and may be heard crooning to
herself at night-fall such stuff as

" Now when the stream of tears is wide,
My willowed harp to thiw is struiig,
Oh ! how I wish that I had died
When mind was pure and form was young."

If no sympathetic confidante is accessible she writes
out what she denominates her " cries of the heart," in the
journal kept secreted at the bottom of her bureau-drawer,
under an innocent-looking pile of underclothes. It is an
excellent safety-valve for these unwholesome gases for
her to keep such a diary. She will burn the blotted
book with shame and laughter, five years from this time,
but it hurts nobody now, and she feels better for havin(y
had her cry — and her say. '^

In the surgical phrase with which we have grown grief-
fully conversant since our national dies irm, July 2, 1881,
such expression is a pus-channel by which morbid and
gangrenous humours' may be drained away.

The girl's whole system is in a ferment under the
stealthy advance of tlie cons.ciousness of sex. To her in-
experience her physical inconvenience is not referable to
a common origin with her unsettled flurries of mood, her
spiritual malaise. It is for you, her mother, to hold
steady the poise of your own judgment, to bear and for-
bear with the " trying child." Time, with the ally of
your good sense *-ill clarify the wine of her life unless
there be at the b. ' om of the shaken cup the poison of a
constitutional m dady. For this you must be alert, ready
to meet symptom with palliative, and, if practicable, dis-
ease with remedy.

■ % I

fi i'

THE FinST TURNING-POINT.

The nicest discriminn^ ■ .-. ...lu^iu bo exercised in the
duty of being considerate with real suffering without
fostering whims into confirmed foibles. If sympathy
with fancied woes is injudicious, ridicule is cruel. Har-
ken lovingly always, even when you withhold approval.
Encourage by precept and example, cheerfulness and
active simplicity of daily habits. Keep the girl as much
in the open air as may be ; let her exercise regularly, but
not violently ; give especial attention to her diet and see
to it that she gets enough sleep. With these precautions
there is little reason to fear any abnormal conditions in
the primary indications thtt " the change " has actually
begun.

Dr. Napheys, who should know what he is saying,
affirms, — "More or less pain, more or less prostration
and general disturbance at these epochs ai-e universal and
inevitable." *

Admitting this, and granting to our girl the tender
regard which has beer> hers in every distress and p;.in
since her birthwail, do not let her pet her indisposition,
01- fall into the easily cont- acted habit of skulking be-
hind it as sufficieat exc e for fretfuluess or indolence.
She must c, made to undeistand that it is cowardly to
cringe or lament under her share of woman's appointed
lot, or to shirk V>Ar given lesson in the practice of woman-
ly fortitude. A.ud, after all, Intelligent management may
and will reduce the suffering to a leore inconvenience, the
discomfort to a minimum. T compass this, secn\e the
girl's co-operation, or th«^ difiii^ultics of your task v.ill be
multiplied a hundred-' ' l.stabiish in your mind the
truth that her childl t i virtually over. You can
drive her back into th mr.-^i . .- with, " Do this," and " i
forbid that," and enforce the old penalties of ( • obedience,
but you weaken your future influence by such ar''itrary
rule. It is an exercise of mental muscle that will avail

* NapLiys' " Physical Life of Woman," p. 25.

The first turning-point.

little when the subject's cluimctcr acquires strength equal
to yours.

I know a devoted motlier who attempts to carry out
with her four giils— all of whom are over fourteen — the es-
pionage and regimen of childish days. 'J'he most apparent
results of her tactics is to fill h own life with uneasiness,
that of her daughers with mortification, and the souls of
her friends with alternate pity and amusement. She will
cover her twenty -year-old young lady with chagrin and
confusion by persisting in feeling the soles of her shoes
on her return from aa evening stroll along dry pavements
in care of a trustworthy escort; forbid a sister of seven-
teen, in audible tones across the table, to touch the mince-
"•ie laid upon her plate by the hostess with whom thev
•e dining, and break off the youngest's fun at a school-
girl-party, exactly at half- past-eight— " the proper bed-
tin , for growing children," she announces, magisterially.
Promises and pledges pass with her for nothing. She
will see herself that her mandates are observed to the
letter. 1\, ontal responsibility i not to be evaded by any
quip of sophistry or twist of personal conscience. It
would be extraordinary were she invariably or frequently
obeyed cheerfully, and yet more remarkable if her charges
yielded her atfectionate respect.

We may as weirassume, without useless argument, ^ .lat
it is the nature ot crude growth to be unreasonable and of
youthful ignorance to be rash, and order our counsels di
plomatically .Remem' .f that the novel trammel fits upon
shoulders and back, and ease the galling whenever you
can. The very training that has carried Mamie safely
over the first stage of the divergent route, predisposes
her to restiveness under unusual restraints, and needless
precaution. Seek to establish perfect confidence between
yourself and your child, if y n have never done this until
novr . ijhe must trust you ;. .id you liiust omit no means
that you may prove W( rthy of this faith. Cement the
alliance by showing that you can help her in adjusting

THE FIRST TURNINQ-POINT.

,i .

minfl and body to tlio new oblij^'ation and (HHcipllno. Am
y<tu liave made life easy and light hcrotofurc, rundur it
cuuifortablc at thin juncture.

As wo shall see, some chapters further on, few frirl.s
need to deviate? from the ordinary routine of duty and
pleasure for a longer time than two days at most. Thus
early in the race, every peculiarity of the season must be
noted and remendjered. Severe cramps in the abdomen
and an intense aching in the small of the back are gene-
rally to be considered as indices of local weaknesH,
or as the effect of; cold or iuiprudence. Ginger tea,
as hot as it can be swallowed, should be administered
when the pain is great. The sufi'orer should be put to
bed and a bottle of hot water applied to her feet. Should
the cramping twinge continue, try strong gin and water,
very hot ; and lay warmed, dry flannel over the affected
region. For the aching back — should it be slow in recov-
ering its normal strength — an AUcock's porous plaster
is an excellent comforter, condjining the sensation of the
sustained pressure of a strong warm hand with certain
tonic qualities developed in the wearing. It should be
kept over the seat of the uneasiness for several days, —
in obstinate cases, for perhaps a fortnight, The prac-
tice of giving elixir of opium, laudanum, or paregoric to
lull the pain of the periodical indisposition, should never
be resorted to without the advice of a physician. Scores
of women have thus laid the foundation of habits that
wrecked health, happiness, and life.

As prevention is better than cure, build up your girl's
constitution to resist these stated assaults upon strength
and patience without permanent injury or more than
trifling discomfort. While hesitating to subscribe in full
to Dr. Napheys' declaration that " Nature is no tender
mother, but a stern step-mother, who punishes us for dis-
regarding her laws," we agree cordially in the sense of the
concluding words of the paragrapl*

THE FIRST TUUNINO-POINT.

" Soft couclu'H, indolent oa.se, hi^'hly-spiceJ food, warm
rooms, weak muscles— these are the infractions of her
rules which she revenges with rigorous, aye, mercilosa
Hcvority."

So soon as the periodical ordeal, or inconvenience
(whichever it may be, our girl votes it." a nuisance"), hiis
passed for the month, she should resume her active pur-
suits — thd diurnal plunge or sponge-bath ; her walks,
rides, and housework. Should the recent infliction have
been luiusually heavy, she must be especially conscientious
in keeping up gentle exercise in the fresli air, lengthening
her walks and drives as she regains vigour. The flaccid
muscles need keeping up — a process performed by stead}',
sustained effort, not severe exertion.

A young friend of mine came home in mid-session from
one of our women's colleges in a deplorable state of health.
The periodical f imctions of which we have been speaking
had been intermitted for five months ; .she was bloated in
figure, and in colour livid ; and excruciating headaches
forbade study or even reading. The family physician had
too much real business on hand to care to work up "a
case," and wasted neither technicalities nor medicine upon
her.

" Set her to doing housework," was his prescription.
'' Work, mitxl yoa ! — not play. Sweeping, dusting, mak-
ing beds, washing dishes, and all the running of errands
in-doors and out that you would demand of waitress or
chambermaid."

In less than six weeks, regularity, and with it health,
were restored.

This obligation to active employment is a cord that
works two pulleys at once. The best corrective to mor-
bidness of body, it also shakes dust and cobwebs and mil-
dew out of brain and heart ; stirring the blood into healthy
circulation ; giving tone to that marvellous reticulation of
sensitive gossamer which so involves and contains the
vitality of the American woman that she thinks it no

J it

THE FIRST TURNING-POINT.

shame to be called, and to know herself as "all nerve";
and, in fine, supplying that prime need of a human being
— something to do. •

I think it is a Turkish proverb which tells us —

" Dreaming goes afoot, but who can think on horseback?"

A house-worker, too, must have all her wits within

easy call, and the expediency of this begets the practice

of " minding what she is about," at all events, while her

hands are thus actively engaged. Longings for fulness

of intellectual sympathy ; heart-cries for appreciation and

reciprocation of nameless yearnings ; bemoanings over

"unkissed kisses" and the wasted shower upon broken

reeds — are deferred, perforce, until the more convenient

season that can not come until " things are set to rights."

A comprehensive term, this, the scope of which the *busy

maiden does not surmise then nor ever, perhaps, until as

a sensible matron she sets her romantic daughters in the

groove that " took the nonsense out" of herself.

Great attention must be paid, not only at this epoch,
but in directly ensuing years, to the care of the skin. I
do not mean of the complexion, although it will tell its
tale in time, of duty done, or of neglect. The growing
girl, whether her habit be full or spare, will, in the process
of maturing, throw off, in perspiration, sensible or invisi-
ble, gross and pestilent humours that would else result in
pysemia, or cutaneous eruptions.

The late Dr. W. W. Hall, the editor of HalVs Journal
of Health, and the pioneer of Common Sense in Medicine,
said aptly that it is time for the acknowledgment of the
truth that human beings are not aquatic fowls. He con-
demned "the continual and unseasonable dabbling and
dipping in vogue among intelligent people— particularly
hurtful when the immersion is in cold water." His re-
commendation, in lieu of this wholesale "dabbling," was a
daily sponge-bath quickly and lightly perform^ed, and
thorough ablution of the upper part of the body with soap
gud water, ever nominar.

'<; S;i

THE FIRST TURNING-POINT.

> n

I believe that the penitential plunge into 'the chilling
bath, untempered by so much as a teacupful of warm
water, executed by hundreds with more pious regularity
than are their devotions, sends many yearly to untimely
graves. It is undoubtedly injurious in all cases when the
reactionary glow does not ensue by the time the skin is
rubbed perfectly dry. As a method of cleansing the body,
it is, in every way, inferior to the work done with a sponge,
or coarse linen cloth and a quart of hot water. The pores
contract instantly under the dash of the cold liquid, shut-
ting in effete matter with dust gathered from without,
and do not expand until the friction, which is the saving
clause in the operation, brings the blood, with restored
warmth, to the surface. The puckering of the skin vul-
garly termed " gooseflesh," caused by a sudden chill and
which roughens the entire surface of the shivering bather,
is temporary congestion of the pores. They do no work
while this continues.

Dr. F. L. Oswald, in an interesting series of papers upon
" Physical Education," published in the Popular Science
Monthly, says of the bath : —

" A bucketful of tepid water will do for ordinary pur-
poses. Daily cold shower-baths in winter-time are as pre-
posterous as hot drinks in the dog-days, Ru jsian baths
and ice-water cures owe their repute to the same popular
delusion that ascribes miraculous virtues to nauseating
drugs, — the mistrust of our natural instincts, culminating
in the idea that all natural things must be injurious to
man, and that the efficacy of a remedy depends on the
degree of its repulsiveness "

Every girl and every woman should wash thoroughly,
down to the waist, at least once a day with soft water, —
in winter with tepid, — and plenty of soap, and sponge the
whole person, especially in warm weather. Should she
pers])ire freely, — and this rule should be absolute when
the exudations tinge her linen yellow — she must make
free use of hot water, with a few drops of ammonia added,

.-! >

.: f

THE FIRST TURNING-POINT.

sponging this off by copious dashes of cold water. This
practice must be followed by her in all seasons, and with
redoubled care in cases where after fatigue or excitement,
adisagreeableodouris emitted by the perspiring skin. The
unfortunate peculiarity just mentioned,— less uncommon
than we are willing to allow ourselves to remember, and
never hinted by tongues polite to those who are the' sub-
jects thereof,— is usually classified among incurable idio-
syncrasies,^ along with foetid l^reath and— more repugnant
still, to refined senses— ill-smelling feet. It is so offensive
to others, so humiliating to the one thus affected, so nau-
seating when blended with the perfumes to which the
victims often resort in the futile hope of overpowering the
efHuvia, that I may be excused for the bluntness of speech
prompted by a desire to supply a practical palliative of
the evil. Abatement of the plague, that is almost reme-
dial, IS found in the regimen 1 have described. The arm- •
pits, and all creases and folds of flesh and skin, ought, in
such instances, to be cleansed twice a day, — oftenc^r in
summer— with water as hot as can be borne, and with old
soap — Castile is best. Shun cologne-water and perfumed
essences. If you use volatile liquids in bathing, alcohol is
better than anything that professes to be fragrant. In the
second water, which must also be hot, mix ten drops of
aqua ammonia, and, lastly, sponge freely with cold water.
Freciuent changes of linen are also indispensable, and
night-dress and bed-clothes should be aired so soon as the
bed is left in the morning.

There are seasons when, as every old woman knows,
the cold bath must be omitted. These are also the times
when the warm or tepid should be most sedulously ap-
plied. The feet should never be plunged into \ery cold
water. Grpve evils have been known to follow such an
act.

The teeth ought to be brushed twice a day, the mouth

iftcr each meal, and a good

age.

dentist consulted twice a year at least. If' whe^ these

THE FIBST TUENING-POINT.

' l;i

these

rules are carefully observed the child's breath is foul the
trouble is with the stomach. A half-teaspoonful of pow-
dered willow -charcoal is a harmless and in most cases an
effectual corrective. Mixed with water, or taken into the
mouth dry, it is not unpleasant, and serves the desired
end much better than drastic medicines.

So much for what may be denominated surface- drain-
age. Of greater moment, because evil and cure are more
radical and permanent, is the sewerage of the body. This
subject was regarded by our fore-mothers as perhaps a
degree and a half less disgusting than the lunar periods.
With multitudes of the present generation it is safe to as-
sume that they never give irregularities of this kind a
minute's thought in a year, until forced into the contem-
plation of the miseries that ensue from habitual neglect.
Physicians have sometimes beguiled women into decent
regard of this matter by convincing them that their com-
plexions ai-e endangered by the suppression or excessive
flow of excretions. To confirmed bad habits of retention
and to choked pores, filled with dust or condensed per-
spiration, is referable the plentiful crop of pimples hand-
ing the school-girl's forehead. Unsuspicious of this fact,
she hides the unsightly clusters by " banging " her hair'
and covers the larger pustules with artful dots of black
court-plaster, supposed to enhance the whiteness of her
skin, or to redeem, by contrast, the muddied complexion
which is unclarifiable by cosmetics. To the same hidden
cause is due— should the dentist have been faithful to his
duty and dyspepsia be a stranger— the impure breath
which IS a secret to nobody but to her who exhales it.

I have already declared constipation to be an uncle'an-
ness. I may add that it is one that betrays itself sooner
and more surely than any other crime against physical
laws, unless it be gluttony of unwholesome food. The
putrescent refuse of 'the system, unnaturally detained in
tlie draught-vessels, infects blood, skin and respiration.
The shame is here — in the careless or wilful bearing

THE FIRST TURNING-POINT.

<!'

about with one, the body of this death and flaunting the
fact of the loathed presence in the faces of acquaintances
and friends — not in the modest observance of such regu-
lations as, rightly obeyed, would keep the breath sweet,
the brain and colour clear.

It is to be regretted t.iat when attention to the qual-
ity and quantity of your girl's diet is of such conse-
quence as at this formative period, she should be most

prone to vitiated

cravings

and finical likings. It is a

circumstance at once fortunate and notable, if she does
not take the notion into her pulpy brain that a healthy
appetite for good, substantial food is " not a bit nice,"
" quita too awfully vulgar, you know." She would be
disgraced in her own opinion and lose caste with her re-
fined mates, were she to " eat like a plough-boy," This
delicacy of taste is altogether compatible with a relish
for chalk, magnesia, slate-pencils, and sulphuric-acid
pickles.

In the number of The Spectator, issued on " Tuesday,
July 15, 1712," we have a letter from a young woman
who had passed through a varied experience of such de-
praved pointings of appetite, and nearly perished by
gratifying each and all of them. Upon her reformation,
she writes to the social censor of the day an account of
her follies, winding up with :

"Now, Mr. Spectator, I desire you would find out
some name for these craving damsels, whether dignified
under some or all of the following denominations (to
wit) : Trash-eaters, oatmeal-cheivers,2npe-champers,chaUc-
lickers,tvax-nibblers,coal-scranchers,waU-peelers, or grav-
el-diggers, and, good sir, do your utmost endeavour to pre-
vent, by exposing, this unaccountable folly, so prevailing
among the young ones of our sex."

This "^ unaccountable folly," still prevalent after the
expose of 170 years ago, consists to a* charm with a " per-
fp.ct pDHsioT! " for a!b.;! -terra confectionery.

THE FIRST TURNING-POINT.

When we were young, sister mine, it was safe to eat
candy— in moderation. We had lollypops and barley-
sticks, and clear lemon-bars and squares of faintly-flav-
oured rose, and melting lengths of " cream " candy, all
ot which we consumed fearlessly, parents and guardians
looking on in smiling envy of the simple e&stasy that
could never again be theirs. An ounce of these " o-ood-
les —to English children, " sweeties "—went further on
the road to gratification than does a pound of the per-
nicious adulteration, painted and perfumed, which is
the modern school-girl's delight. In the consideration
ot the morbid frenzy of desire for deleterious comestibles
conspicuous " among the young ones of our sex," who
can forbear a thought of " ordinary generation " and our
Great First Mother's hankering after the one prohibited
dainty of Eden ?

Convince Mamie that the lovely emerald of the pistache
drop IS arsenical ; that there is Prussian-blue in another
and softer shade of green, and red-lead in the rose-colour,
lalk of chemical analyses, and revolting revelations that
have come about by providential and retributive fires, of
hogsheads of alba-terra side by side with barrels of white
sugarin the vaults of candy makers. She shudders out
tha it IS "perfectly horrid," and keeps on munchintr.
Another touch of nearer heredity ! Do not we remem-
ber the delicious thrill of horror with which, on beino-
cautioned against eating loaf-sugar, " because it' was clarf-
fied with bullock's blood," we applied the test commended
and held a lump at the candle-flame until a brownish
bubble seethed out on the heated side— then, ate the sugar.

Crusades against candy and pickles avail little while
the stomach demands, with the avidity of youthful desire,
acids and sweets to assist the action of the gastric juice'
See if it will not accept fruit instead. I doubt if a well
person who likes apples and peaches— and what well per-
riun aoco not? — could eai enough of them to hurt her,
provided always that the fruits are sounU and ripe. Decay

THE FIRST TUllNING-POINT.

in any shape is unwholesome. Children fatten like pigs
— their skins grow smooth and clear in the peach-season.
The family that substitutes fruit, even when it is most
expensive, for deserts of pies, puddings, and preserves,
will find a pure money-gain at the end of the year, and
interest, generous and compound, in health and peace of
mind.

If Mamie has not a rational appetite, create a digestive
conscience that may serve her instead. Prescribe for her
as in any other sickness. Give her wholesome bread and
butter, juicy meats — boiled, broiled, roast — never fried ;
vegetables properly cooked ; cream, milk, and eggs.

Watch — as for her health and happiness — that she does
not fall into the, to a girl, easily besetting fault of stimula-
ting lagging desire by seasoning her food immoderately,
even with condiments esteemed as are salt and pepper.
Salt is a sovereign styptic, that, if taken in largo quantities,
dries up the blood and other natural juices of the body.
Black pepper is highly inllammatory — more heating than
cayenne, although it has not the constipative properties
of the latter — the capsicum of medicine. Cancers have
been formed in the coat of the stomach by lavish and con-
tiii'icd use of black pepper.

To quote again from Dr. Oswald : — " A slice of a pep-
pered and allspiced vinegar pickle will blister your skin
as quickly as a plaster of Spanish flies."

Yet our girl will blacken the contents of her' plate
with this blistering powder, and aver that she cannot
without it eat the "insipid stutf" offered for her con-
sumption and nutriment. She soon grows, or degenerates,
into a fondness for high seasoning of all kinds ; atfects
curries and peppery salads and spiced entremets. The
sour to please her must be very tart, the sweet very sweet.
Her brother at eighteen is more easily contented with >
plain fare, provided there is enough of it. If he indulges
then in his first cigar, it is because the " otlirr iViiuws do
it," and from mannish ambition rather than iu obedience

THE FIRST TURNING-POINT.

to the j)romptin^s of appetite. Mamie would drink
strong tea and coffee of her own accord, and thinks a glass
of old sherry would give her a relish for (lie dinner she
does not care to taste. Instead of frowning down her
confessions as " fast talk," add the desire they express to
the craving for slate-dust, lime and lemons, and include
all under symptomatic irregularities. Her physical and
mental composition is in a ferment, her ebullitions of
opinion and temper are but breaking bubbles. She will
not be quiet and cool of herself, and it is your duty to
keep her at as even a temperature as you can brino-
about. °

I assume that, as a child, she has not been allowed to
use tea and coffee as daily beverages. Resolutely with-
hold these now, except when the tea is given as medicine
for a headache, or in an illness where warm drinks are
professionally prescribed. AVhile T am a believer for my-
self in the " comforting " properties of a cup of good
mixed tea, and freely offer the same to persons of mature
age and fixed habits, I would not let girls under eighteen
drink it or coffee every day or even frecpiently. Apart
from the inconvenience attendant upon the habit of
using, therefore needing a tonic at stated intei-vals, and
the suffering entailed by occasional unavoidable privations
of the same, the present effect upon stomach and nerve is
detrimental to the tone of both. At best these drinks
can do no good. They may do much harm, — tea by
intensifying the strain of a nervous-sanguine tempera-
ment, coffee by augmenting the secretion of l)ile in a
system predisposed to the" bilious-lymphatic. Mamie's
nerves may be naturally weak and uncertain, but tea
will not strengthen them. Jennie's bilious sick-headache
may be lifted for a day by a cup of black coffee. The
next attack will come the sooner, and be the worse for
the accession of bile extracted from the delicious poison.
Poison it is to her, as would be wines, spirits of all kinds,
— spices, — whatever heats the turbid blood that will run

■■

I^^B

r\M

^^H

1 "

I^H

1 ■ •?'

1|^|

. 2

. 5

.^1

'
^

THE FIRST TURNma-POINT.

healthfully and evenly by and by, if we can but tide over
this crisis.

" I would rather strike matches all day on a powder-
cask than marry a woman with such a temper," remarked
a young man to me, in commenting upon a beautiful

virago

The boyish outburst recurs to me when I witness the
temerity with which mothers suffer to be carried amontr
the easily-disturbed forces of their daughter's health such
dangerous appliances as stimulating food and drinks,
sensational fiction and questionable associations. The
mischief done by these to a boy's harder nature nmy be
temporary— a superficial stain that may be removed by
tinie and friction. Just now your girl's whole system is,
as It were, composed of sensitive nerve-tips, as the sur-
face of the tongue is said to be. Impressions are taken
—transmitted— and incorporated with fearful facility,
made up into the transitional being which is soon to be
herself and a woman.

"Temperance and Patience" should be our motto at
this epoch, if never again in her life.

^^A^-"'

•"x*^ U^^^ ©"J^*^

CHAPTER VII.

GIRLHOOD.

" ?*?'"<'"'g with reluctant feet,
VVheie the brook and river meet
Womanhood and childhood fleet."

-LoNGFKLLOw, "Maidenhood."

f^J"fnl^''^^~^'''"^'*^'','^',"''"^^^-"^akes no mention of
the still waters on winch the shallop of girlhood may float;

f imp^« Tn 1 Tu!"'^^ ^^'"^ ^^^^^ ^^««»^e' i^ «"r rushing
oTl\ ^"^^V^^> ^'^""^^ narrower with each year and
cut up by much trespassmg.

.f,3l^'%'' P^S* ^"^ physiologists, no less than to the
student of psychology, that as a class, neither misses of

wmnpf' " Py^Mr ""^T^l f hool-girls of seventeen, are
women. 'Childhood fleet" has swept past our dau-hter,

nelZT^^^ ^^ '%^tK ?'' VrosLAfe and being are
new and untried. The ithe David must, whether he will
or not, bear armour which he has not proved, but he
moves awkwardly, and by constraint. The graceful child
becomes shy, because ill at ease, as her arms lengthen and
her feet get into one another's way. She is oddly-you

IZuT'T^ly"'''^^'^ *° «t«°P inwalkmg,andto
hitch her shoulders nervously, when'^spoken to unexpec-
tedly. Unaccountable angles have taken the place of
curves and jerky wires of pliable muscle. You love her
• none the less, but you are less proud of her than you

lubtsTAh" "'T-' *■''* ^T «o°^-i«^'-us soul with
doubts of the judiciousness of the traii---: that has pro-
duced this result. ^

aiRLHOOD.

If you are to be pitied, do not forget that there is a
greater sufferer than the girl's mother— even Mamie her-
self. She would be very angry were any one to suggest
a resemblance between her state and that of a pollvwo",
but very far down in her humbled consciousness she lias
thought of it herself, and wonders, rebelliously, just where
in the world or in the scale of humanity she belonc^s.
No one part of her seems to match the other, and in lier
agony of bashfulness she imagines that everybody is as
conscious of the misfit as is she who hardly recognises
her own individuality while the rubbing and grinding
and creaking of re-organization are going on. It is a
gravr ,i perilous era with her, the more interesting to the
iut<iUi</unt observer because it is not comely in its exter-
nal liiarufestations.

Wm leave so little margin, in this age, for girlhood, that
Mamie has scanty and slippery standing-room on the
delta made by the junction of the brook and river. She
would indignantly repudiate the assertion that she has
" grown-up notions," yet that this is true is the source of
a large jiroportion of her discomfort. To be a young lady
is a hope the realization of which appears to her excited
fancy almost within her grasp. To shake off"awkwardness,
rawness, — all that makes her miserable now ; to be ad-
mired, and not tutored ; courted, and not shunned, to be
a gauzy-winged moth and not a scaly beetle,— these are
some of the brilliant possibilities that feed reverie and
dream. Who can-marvel at or chide her ? The realm in
which Penelope, who is just " out," swims and soars and
shines, an adored Psyche, is to Mamie Fairy Land, and
the boundary-lines are delightfully undetermined. She
likes to hear how her own great-grandmother married at
fifteen, and cherishes the recollection of an old-fashioned
novel of very ephemeral character she read once in the
garret of a country-house, the heroine of which— Lady
Lucy Ounniughaui -was a " witching creature who had
not yet numbered sixteen summers of mortal existence,"

ing-

GIRLHOOD.

of the inasciiliTio gender

yet who (Irovo all beholders
crazy by her beauty and wit.

Mamie wishes that mamina was not so i. . asonably
obstinate in her objections to long dresses and crimped
hair, and girds ungratefully at the formula of introduc-
tion uttered by the gentle voice;— " This is my little
daughter." Nothing Hatters her more immensely than
to be mistaken for " nineteen, at least," a weakness which
every one who cares to minister to such small vanities
remembers when Indden " to guess her age." Penelope
is " presented " to new acquaintances who exchange
stately bows with the belle, but, after mamma's obnoxious
speech shake hands familiarly with poor " little " Mamie.
She eeho( s bitterly the Scriptural saying that a man's
foes (and deductively a woman's) are "of his own house-
hold. She knows that licv whole family is leagued in
the effort to relegate her to the ranks of doll-tending
misses. Papa offers his hand instead of his arm, — which
she could easily reach ! when ho takes her out walking !
her eldest brother says indignantly, "That Infant!"
when an old friend, who was the best man at her parents'
wedding, accosts her deferentially as, " Miss Mary." The
very servants pay no attention to her orders and laugh
insolently at the painfully -rehearsed disi)lays of dignity
she airs for their benefit. One and all, they conspire to
describe her age as fourteen when it sounds so much
better to emuhi.; her example of saying, "in my fifteenth
year." She is ready to believe that "they actually hate
her— they take such pains to thwart and mortify her at
every turn. In short, as she — our typical girl — surveys
it, the Debatable Ground is a highway of discontent
w] '^reupon no one abides who can get away.

Mamie is dear to my motherly, and to my authorly
soul, yet regard for her best interests conjoin with truth,
urging me to reiterate the asseveration that — her great-
grandmother and Lady Lucy Cunningham notwithstand-
ing—Mamie is not a woman yet, by several degrees of

' *%k

IMAGE EVALUATION
TEST TARGET (MT-3)

1.0

1.1

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1 2.5
2.2

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Sciences
Corporation

23 WEST MAIN STREET

WEBSTER, N.Y. 14580

(716) 872-4503

L1>^

^V^^ <^1

<,^^<t.

^''A^ ^

^° ..^^

GIRLHOOD.

Ill

Hi *.

growth and ripeness. She ought, as a sensible creature,
to be grateful for the interregnum of girlhood, but, as I
have intimated, we need not be surprised that she is not.
Sfie is " but a lassie yet, ' — a " green girl," — i.e., crude, not
of necessity acerb. If rightly viewed and enjoyed, the
estate of girlhood bears to Penelope's full-fledged young
ladyism the relation that the dawn, soft with tenderest
rose-graj', and sweet with dewy odours, does to the glare
of midsummer noon.

It is a jafe and sheltered season when nobody thinks
of demanding much from the immaturity of which she is
ashamed, or judges harshly the inexperience she disclaims.
All humane well-wishers — and she has no enemies — look
kindly upon the folded bud. This serenity she ruffles,
and shakes away the dew in the fierce attempt to blossom
before her time. The ridicule of broihers, and the petu-
lant expostulations of girls older than herself who are
intolerant of " the folly of the pert little minx," exaspe-
rate, but do not alter, her feelings or her behaviour. She
even salves the scratches inflicted upon self-conceit by the
conviction that the " mean things only want to keep her
back " because they dread a probable or certain rival.

As the value of implicit obedience in family govern-
ment is most clearly shown in exigencies, as when a sick,
hurt, or frightened child would but for previous training
be unmanageable and so destroy its only chance of safety
-vso now the mother who has never let go her daughter's
hand, never tempted her by indifierence, real or apparent,
to seek a more sympathizing counsellor, finds in the in-
fluence she has established over affection and will an in-
valuable power for good. Talk, as is your wont, lovingly
and patiently with the perturbed creature. Coax and
reason down (still patiently) the tumult of morbid vanity
and senseless aspirations that have changed the free care-
lessness of your child into unrest and pain. The girl is
at war with everything — most of all, and none the less
truly because she does not suspect it, with herself. She

11 1'

GIRLHOOD.

wants to be beautiful, accomplished, popular, and grown
all at once. Imagination, under the heat of the fermen-
tation described m our last chapter, outruns possibility
and exhorts her to be satisfied with nothing short of in-
stant truition. Her mirror and the aforementioned bro-
thers and elder friends set for the rising of tempers and
tailing ot pride m her beleaguered soul, oppose to this
vision ot perfection unformed features, a complexion too
red or too sallow, limbs of disproportionate length or
thickness, and a figure that drives her to despair, being,
as she complains, " worse than none at all." If she is
thin, it IS with a slab-like leanness that defies the dress-
makers arts. If plump, she berates herself as a criminal
against refinement and t^sthetic taste ; and prays, in crood
or bad earnest, for a spell of illness to pull her down

As a standpoint from which to conduct future opera-
tions try to persuade her that very few outside of her
own family ever trouble themselves to think of her looks
so long as she is neat and behaves with propriety The
smart to her vanity will be salutary, if severe. Next, set
before her the infinite value of the accumulative period
and congratu ate her upon the blessing of living within it.
Immaturity, let her observe, is not deformity, but a state
of growth with such advantages of superb development
as those who are her seniors by ten years have nof- fco
obtain which they would sacrifice all the privileges accru-
ing to them from mere superiority of a^e

And, while inculcating these whole^'some tniths. bind
them firmly about your own heart and hold them there

Weak mothers, fond mothers, ambitious mothers, do
much to lower the standard of womanhood, besides injur-
ing and dwarfing their offspring-body, soul, and intellect
—by abetting the ill-judged impatience of girls of this
age to assume the position for which they are utterly un-
^> ij^.^i.7?.^^^/ " Pr«tty-behaved " little maid in her
pimple fiuck seldom bie.se« our eyes nowadays in house,
church, or street. The alinust-young-lady meets us with

,; ♦

GIRLHOOD.

t •

a sitnper or a stare, and. if she thinks it worth her while
to talk with us alternately pains and provokes us by
shallow chattel-, herself leading the conversation as by
right. She has unlimited silk drosses per annum, selects
her own dressmaker, and takes the matter of apparel and
tashion s variations far more ait serieux than does Pene-
lope, whose belleship is an established verity. Already
she adores round dances, and votes it "slow "to waltz
with gu-ls. "They can't hold her up properly" (Ian

t:^X^^:^"''' ^ "^"^''^ thLs^kiilsare
Papa applauds her pertness as wit, as indiscriminately
as he kughed at her gambols before she could talk, and
as injudiciously aa he gave her a dollar for looking pretty,
lo the wisest fathers daughters are forever children with-
out responsibilities and futureless. Mamma likes to see
Mamie happy, and contrives diversions and delights with-
out end tor her. If exceptionally amiable. Mamie toler-
ates both parents ; and, while snubbing Mamma when it
must be done in the cause of Young American progress
in civilization and the fine-arts, apologi ^or her "an-
tiquated ideas."

Ah! Dame Partlet on the brink of the pool, who can
not help admiring the adventurous spirit of her duck-
lings, while frightened out of her dull wits for their fate
in tiie element that would be death to her, is no bad type
ot many a well-meaning and very human mother. We
do well to take ourselves to task, sift our own weaknesses

mucrforuf'""^ ^^^ ^""^' '''^'''^'■'' "^•'"^"^ *o ^^ too
I insert as altogether apropos to this section of our
subject two pregnant paragraphs from " Duties of Women"
by b ranees Power Cobbe.

rlnH^^^'%'^''";r 7^"". ^^^''^'' ^^^"^^^ q"^<^« equal to the
duties of motherhood almost betrays by that fact that
she has only the meanest notions of their nature and

GIRLHOOD,

Gon^nlV " '"^'^ 'f ^'^"'^ *^'''^*' ^° *'^« «'Wful love of

a?o„t\^fi;rt:Sr^

time, a severity which ^^&^':^ t^^^
needed to recall us from sin, or purify, oT saTctSy r?^'
If Mo,miehas not yet "been put into the XliZL
Class at school, her mother ought to have studied nS
laws with suftcient diligence to lead her to the comnre
hension of the progressive mechanism e,.close,l Tn^the"
taste^ful garments that take up so much of her W and

"I feel like an engineer who has set in motion work-«
he does not comprehend," lamented an honTZ^Ct

In the recollection of her and of thousands of ri.rht
iS'l^'Tt'; consunied by regrets and district"? by
aouDts, 1 ask you to be patient with me while vou ro-iil
the pages immediately ucceeding this, if what they con
tarn IS already known-it can ne'Ver b; trite^to vTu

I have used the term "cellular tissue" once or twice
In order to make clear the numerous references to thS
which wiU hereafter occur in this volume I take th- h
Sniil^^r^^ ^^- ""^'^ ^-^^ exp'Jat,*o'; t

" ^,^® "^sterious process which physiolocrists call 'meta
morphos,s' ot tissue or interstitial change, deseives Xn"
tion m connection with our subject

i. 2t 'f *'l "^^'T ^'^ "^^'^^^' ^^ <^he human system force
IS developed, and growth and decay rendered possible

"Growth health, and disease are cellular minifp^tn

inf^of a thniio-lif +K^ 4.1' -11 "':'^'''^"g OT a "Wurd, thecoin-
"lo or a thought, the thrill of an emotion, there is the

.r ?

; .it

- t 3

aiRLHOOD.

destruction of a certain number of cells. Their destrue-
tion evolves, or sets free, the force that we recormise as
movement, speech, thought, and emotion. The number of

S L 'i'T/^ I'P"'''^^ upon the intensity and duration
ot the effort that correlates their destruction

"From birth to adult age the cells of muscle, orcran
and brain that are spent in the activities of life such as
digesting, growing studying, playing, working, 'and the
nuSbe? l^y others of better quality and larger

"At least such is the case ivhere 'metamorphosis is Per-
mitted to go on normally." ^

(I use italics in the transcription of the last sentence to
themer^ "'^ homelier continuation of the interesting

To return to Dr. Clarke :

nl^i'li^'^^'i*' """'* ^^^^"^ f^^"^ ^^'' '■^P^^'' a^'^ rapid growth •
children for repair and moderate growth ; middle-aged
folk, for repair without growth, and old people only for
the minimum of repair. Girls, between the a^es of four-
teen and eighteen, must have sleep, not only for rena r
and growth, like boys, but for the additional tlsk of con-
W? r^' Tv> "''''' V^^V^^\y speaking, of developing and
an engtnf » "" ^ reproductive system-the engine within

That child, or young girl, who does not consider the
famiyrule of " early-to-bed » as reasonless tyranny is
usually one of the goody-goody school, or spiritless Ln
weak health. That our Mamie should rebel against it "s
not a sin or even a fault. a^ius^t ic is

" One has such good times after dark ! " she murmur.,
and with truth. The mei-ry chat and games a™ the
hre and amp in winter, when papa and the boys are at
home; the dropping in of agreeable acquaintances the
occasional lecture, or concert, or party, the walks and
talks m the summer twilight ; surely we have known too
well the charm of these in our youthful prime to be irH

..>i!|

GIRLHOOD.

tated because our daughter owns it in her turn.* Before
she can be quite amenable to a law curtailinrr these in!

SZn.^'tr "' ""'^T' apprehension oTthe "otiVe
better thfn^ command ; comprehend her "make-up "

renelope may— if ..he be a very stalwart Penelone-
dance until two or three o'clock three nights out of seven
and for two or more seasons sustain no'appreciab e dlm-
cLSutTon'ori' ''""^^'. ^^^"^^ blesreV^Uh a fine

ermnle of h- -^l-' •''"' T '^T'^^^^^y ^^^^^^e the
example ot her cassic namesake, and, for a term of years
pull out by night that which she wove by day" Pene
lope IS a made woman. Mamie is in making. In thfone
cells and tissues are defined and firm, muscles elastn'

f7c7 There? '^'f''"' ^^'^'^^t^^^' ^^ eaT^er:
dmLhf J « '"'' ''°?'' "r^ *^^ 'y^^^ the mysterious
diaught of "growing "-the leech -that saps enercry and
impoverishes the Wood; sends sickening arches Into le^s
and back, and stitches into side and chest. ^

A??f ^if/r^^^ r^"V' " f^^ ^i^eacres, carelessly.

As if the 'only made them the easier to bear ! The
act of growth, then, pulls' so heavily and incessantlv
crtury' "Xr r ^'''l ^T^-hiJstened withrou^
pnn!7T' i 1 f ,*'^^"®' — *h^* a quantum of sleen
equal to that which suffices to restore Penelope's roses

ca'r'lfTh?-''''^""'^"^.^^"^^'^ ^--« from^hisTne
cause. If she is growing fast— " running away from her

tered for the debility occasioned by her shootinc up a U

season 'Sl?nTp''' ^ -^^ ^^PP^^s, indigestible food at any
season, violent exercise, such as jumping the rope lone, at
a time, running until exhaustion ind" faintness enf ue

t'rrf fit ofi '"'^'" ?^"^; ^^^^^"-1 laugh tei S
mS«l 1- V*'""^"' ^""^ «P^««n-whatever bodily or
mental agication is succeeded by reactionary proltra-

I ti

' i-

100

GIRLHOOD.

tion— are direct enemies of health and what may, at
her age, appeal more forcibly to our girl's reason— to
personal comeliness. Each is a waste-tap upon the main
reservoir. Nature will do her best, pitying, faithful
worker that she is, but Nature can not work without
material. When her stores are exhausted, she can not
create.

This is a stubborn fact, an awful truth when we look
at the consequences attendant upon practical infidelity
in the principle. It is a trivial matter to us, in the dis-
cussion of it, whether living tissues are the result of
chemical combinations, or the direct production of the
Maker's hand. There is but partial consolation in the
reflection that therq are untold myriads of them formed
and embryotic. There is a limit— somewhere, and when
we know not— to their reproduction, none to their waste
until the store is exhausted. Call it by what name we
will— amorphous, bioplasmic, germiniU matter— it is the
Life, and beyond the supply lies Death.

The unformed girl may borrow from the reserves de-
signed to meet the wants of the woman, the woman at
twenty-five draw upon the Supplies she ought not to
touch until she is forty; each age may push on the evil
day or hour of bankruptcy, subsisting upon slender and
sti I more meagre supplies of daily bread, but come it
will, and if not by her own conscience, yet in a Hio-her
Record the spendthrift will be written down " Defaulter "
When shall we see Health as it is ?— a Duty ! and viola-
tion of physical laws as a Sin ?

I was cheered as by the finding of a treasure, the
other day, at overhearing a young girl say scornfully to
a school-fellow : "^

'^I should be ashamed to be sickly ! No ! I won't call
it ' delicate.' It is very m-delicate to my way of think-
ing. I say the word out plainly—' sickly.' It is as much
my duty to keep well as to keep clean. Of course, acci-

GIRLHOOD.

b may, at
eason — to
the main
:, faithful
: without
! can not

n we look
infidelity
1 the dis-
result of
3n of the
)n in the
n, formed
md when
eir waste
name we
-it is the

erves de-
I'oman at
t not to
L the evil
nder and
come it
I Higher
ifaulter."
id viola-

lure, the
ifully to

on't call
f think-
as much
se, acci-

101

nroud nn,n^PP'f u '?**" "f precautions, bit nobody is
P mT °^ saving fallen into the mud ' "

8marUv''ir?hf ''"f ^^'f '^ wonum-child laid her hatchet
smartly at the root of as rotten a stump as disgraces
pur civilization. Thousands of women, not deficienUn
mte hgence otherwise, base their claims to respect ilcon^
health "'"Cf^r'" •"^^^l^"^^^ "1-- theii <' dolicaL

stumblVd I/i L P^''"H °^" ^^'^y ^'^^^ tinned or
stumbled and brought upon them the chastening of pain

P averHf Ihe"''^ commend them to the compassion C
mZlf, • ll ""f' ^"^ ^y ^^^^ curious moral and
mentar twist they have come to look upon their position

■ s^mXTas'^ interesting,the recita/oftheir

symptoms as one of the decencies of polite society, is one
of the pitiable problems of our femininity. Each of my
readers has upon her visiting list one -she is more ?uckv
than the writer if she has not ten or twen^ylTho would
lenttlh ^^r"«-^"^-^«d."P?n the posseLon of^ce^
lent health. It is no provincial figure of speech when

badVealti '"?;?' T'' T'^'^'^y *^^^ " they enj^y
bad health They do as thoroughly as did Mrs Pullet

.^th^rt^r^ ^" '''^'^' '- '-^^^- -^^"-

"I should be poorly ofl^if he was to have a stroke f .t

stuff's PmTt"" "ir" ''^" ^'' '' *^ke my doctoV
stun— and I m taking three sovts now. . Pnllof

mnTcn w tV'^^^"-'*'^^^-™"'" «'^elves a'ready. I
srjs^hfn'n?^^' ""'^^^^ up the dozen of these^last
sizes Ihe piU-boxesarein the closet in my room but
there s nothing to show for the boluses, if ^t isS the

The range of thought with these professional valetudi-
narians IS among the tuneless, frayed strings of theh-
abused organizations. Their aches, irregularities and
failures arfi the sbsnlo r^nnV -»«-.. ^ ^y.^ 7>"''***"*''^ «-"<!
satinn Thl f'^^P^c (such pour stuff!; of their conver-
sation. Themselves being witnesses, such expenditure of

I; -.1 ;

»' '

102

GIRLHOOD.

time, labour and medical skill is required to keep the
w<5rks of their bodies in tolerable order that we read with
wicked satisfaction Mr.Darwin's snarl which once shocked
our finer sensibilities :

" We civilized men do our utmost to check the progress
of civilization ; we build asylums for the imbecile, the
maimed, and the sick ; we institute poor-laws ; and our
medical men exert their greatest skill to save the life of
every one to the last moment There is reason to believe
that vaccination has preserved thousands, who, from a
weak constitution, would formerly have succumbed to
small-pox. Thus the weak members of civilized societies
propagate their kind. , No one who has attended to the
breeding of domestic animals will doubt that this must
be highly injurious to the race."

Heaven and humanity forbid that we should deal rough-
ly, even in thought, with the feeble and stricken ones
who, from shattered earthly tabernacles oftentimes see
farther into the world that sets this right, and into the
counsels of its Ruler than do our fleshly eyes ! It would
be equally cruel and also ungrateful were we to overlook
the work done for the Master and His creatures by inva-
lids like Richard Baxter, John Calvin and Elizabeth Bar-
rett Browning. But we plead with you, mothers — with
society — and with our daughters themselves, that they
may not be handicapped for the course just begun.
Bodily health is never pertinently termed " rude." It is
not coarse to eat heartily, sleep well and to feel the life
throbbing joyously in heart and limb.

" I do not call myself at my best until I feel, on rising
in the morning, as if I could put my shoulder against the
world and turn it over," said a woman of forty, who had
borne six children, and done in every one of twenty j'ears
three hundred days' work, — and who, in her summing
up of daily mercies, never failed to begin, " We thank
Thee. Lord, for /ie«M."

niRLIIOOD.

103

If a sound mind in a sound body is a glorious thincr in
Man, it IS in Woman sublime. °

Our Mamie would be patient with her nonage, cease to
desjuse her youth, could she arrive now by your help at
a fair appreciation of the worth of the wealth she inav
amass during the years that are to be shod with lead,
lo teach her lionesty of purpose and praetice, call thiu'^s
by their nght names. Show no charity to the faded
trippery of sentiment that prates over romantic sickliness
Inculcate a fine scorn for the desire to exchan<'e her
present excellent health for the estate of the pale, droop-
ing human-lh)wer damsel; the taste that covets the
tascination of lingering consumption ; the " sensation "
ot early decease induced by the rupture of a blood-vessel
over a laced handkerchief held firmly to her lily mouth
by agonised parent or distracted lover. All this is bathos
and vulgarity, undeserving the dignity of rebuke, were it
not sintul to the verge of sacrilege, when the ruin thus
sentimentally anticipated is that of the temple of the
body— the holy building committed to your child's keep-
ing. Bid her leave such balderdash to the pretender to
ladyhood, the low-minded jmroe7iue, who, because foibles
are more readily imitated than virtues, and tricks than
graces, copies the mistakes of her superiors in breeding
and sense, and is persuad-d that she has learned " how to
do it.

V V

', »

131

il' - ie M^^^fli^ ^^^^^

CHAPTER VIII.

BRAIN-WORK AND BRAIN-FOOD.

" Much of our t'dncatinn buiMw an arc, and not the wliole ciri'uinforenpe
of culture. Only wholo wIu'i-Ih will roll. Wherever wo leave out an arc in
our culture, there Ih likely, an the wheel rolls, to be a halt Bonie day." —
JosKi'H Cook, " Heredity."

Dr. Holm ks, whose' professional astuteness rises to the
altitude of genius, has interwoven pearls of physiological
truth among the arabesques of weird fancy, that make
"Elsie Venner" a marvellous book. The strange, sad
story has its mission as truly as has " Nicholas Nick-
leby," but the lesson is of a finer strain ; scalpel and
probe move skilfully among more delicate and occult
agencies.

The physician, and not the novelist, speaks in such
passages as these :

" Silas Peckham was a thorough Yankee, born on a
windy part of the coast, and reared chiefly on saft fish.
Everybody knows the type of Yankee produced by this
climate and diet; — thin, as if he had been split and
dried ; with an ashen kind of complexion like the tint
of the food he is made of, and about as shai-p, tough,
juiceless, and biting to deal with as the other is to the
tas^.e.

" Mrs. Peckham was from the West, raised on Indian
corn and pork, which give a fuller outline and a more
humid temperament, but may perhaps be thought to ren-
der people a little coarse-fibred •

" All feeding-establishments have something odious
about them, — fi-om' the wretched county-houses where

miAIN-WOllK AND URAIN-FOOD.

105

panpors are farmt.l out to the lowest h'uldt

cominonH-tal.lo at collej'e.s, and

VV, U|) to tlu

evuii tlio fashionald

lo
war

boanlin;^r.h„u.so. A i)er.s(m's appetite should he at
with no other purse than his own, Youn;,' people, espe-
cially, who have a hone-factory at work in them, and
liave to feed the livinif looms of innumerahle growing
tissues, should he provided for, if possible, by those who
love them like then- own tlesh and hlood."

Here k the link that hinds these fragments into a
chain suitable for our present pur{)oso: —

" Silas Peckham kept a young ladies' school exactly
as he would have kept a hundred head of cattle,— for
the simple unadorned purpose of making just as much
money in just as few years as could be safely done."

It is easy to explain wh} the mother whose homo is
in the country, remote from all except the common dis-
trict-school, should, however reluctantly, yield to the
impetus of necessity aiad her own desire to give her
bright daughter "the advantages of a libei-al education."
and send her at twelve or fourteen years of aife to a city-
seminary, or celebrated institute located in a "salubrious
and beautiful country neighbourhood." Her ])ractical
common-sense may appreiiend the disadvantages of the
"fee«ling-establishment" for mind and body a.s'thorough-
ly as Dr. Holmes does ; but, acting upon the principle°of
tne next best thing, she takes the step, very much as she
provides her .family in winter with canned vegetables, as
better than none. ^

The city mother, with a dozen seminaries of excellent
repute within half an hour's walk of her door, is more
independent in thought and action than her neighbours,
if she does not consider it expedient to " finish off" her
girls at a collegiate institute a hundred miles away. She
and the girls are f(jrtimate if they are not sent from
home to school while still in short dresses. The usual
excu.sc for the last-named barbaritv is inteni'

'ly

ican; The child will not study at home, the parent avers

-y;

'\ ,1

lOG

BRAIN-WORK AND BRAIN-FOOD.

without a shade of mortification, and she will go out to
so many parties and " frolics " of divers sorts that regu-
lar habits are an impossibility. The mother has always
done her best to maintain discipline, but without success.
Her temper and her daughter's education are in like
danger of ruin. In fine, the child she has borne is, at
thirteen, beyond parental control, and must be subjected
to the impartial discipline of an establishment. Once
entered, with due form and paj'ments, as a fractional
part of a whole, she must come under the laws regu-
lating the patent machinery — be one cog of a wheet, a

section of a screw — or

The mother, who is convinced in her own mind that
she is too tender-hearted to restrain her darling's natu-
ral preference of amusement above work, to arouse
her from her indolence, and stimulate her noble desires,
would be startled were she to think out the significance
of that " or."

The disposition, to save herself pain and annoyance,
the wearing care of seeing rebellious looks and tears, of
rebuking disrespect and disobedience— is easily mistaken
for unselfish anxiety for her daughter's real good. She
does not, in the computation of pros and cons, set the
suflTerings of the home-sick child, her perils at the hands
of hasty or stern teachers and uncongenial mates, the
chances of nerve-strain and moral contamination, and
physical neglect, against the felt ills of home education,
and deliberately resolve to take the risks. It is not easy
to judge soberly and independently in her individual
case, with Fashion and friends on one side, the single aim
of real . nd lasting benefit, even to a beloved object, on
the other. In order that she may weigh evidence dis-
passionately and evenly, the mother must be able to
think, no less than to feel, and it is not, every respectable
married woman, model housekeeper, and devoted parent
who knows how to think. Educational " advantages "

BRAIN-WORK AND BRAIN-FOOD.

107

of a certain grade are required to drill one's mind in this
exercise.

^ There is no lack of warning-signals to those who are
inclined, for any or all of the reasons we have reviewed
or nnpelled by other and better ones, to place girls of
tender years in boarding-schools.

From Vassar, comes :

" Applicants for admission to the College must be at
least sixteen years of age, of good health," etc.

Wellesley sounds the sp--e note, and yet more de-
cidedly : "^

_ " Students of sixteen years of age are received, but it
^s better that none enter the Freshman Class until they
are seventeen or eighteen."

(The italics are. mine.)

And Smith :

" Candidates for admission must be, at least, sixteen
years of age."

Mount Holyokk— Mary Lyon's bequest to her grate-
ful countrywomen, the Nursing-Mother of missionaries'
wives— with the shrewd sense and wise economy that
characterize all its departments, is, perhaps, most explicit
iir^M^ principal women's colleges on this point :

" While candidates are admitted to the Junior (lowest)
Class at sixteen years of age, it is desirable that they
shou d be seventeen or eighteen years of age. None
should enter the Senior Class under twenty."

What is the plain meaning of all this, except that those
who have made the instruction of girls a study, and re-
duced to a science, which is their profession, the risks
possibilities, and certainties involved in the question of a
Higher Educfition for Women, will not— dare not assume
the responsibility which the mother manifests her willing-
ness to shirk ? ^

" We refuse "—so might the language of tho catalogues
be rendered—" to sanction the removal of would-be pupils
trom their homes until the constitutions jarred by the

i\ :1i

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108

BRAIN-WORK AND BRAIN-FOOD.

li!

I:it

transition from childhood to girlhood have settled into
normal health ; the regularity of the delicate functions of
the newly-indicated Third Part of the girl's physical being
been established and verified by, at least, twenty-four
months of time."

Abstract science is more sage and more humane than
the loving mother who, without a thought of revoking the
edict of exile, sheds furtive tears over the boarding-school
outfit of her fourteen-year-old girl, and wonders, with an
aching near akin to genuine heart-break, " how she can
ever live without the child ! "

We talked, in a former chapter, of the propriety of
creating a stomachic conscience that should choose the
food and eschew the evil in dietetics. That this is rarely
accomplished, even with healthy, hungry girls, at four-
teen or sixteen, let the unofficial and unwritten records of
b arding-school life reveal. The reproach of bread-and-
butter-missishness does not appertain to American girls,
whatever may be said of English. Those of us who have
sickened yearly at the made-to-order fare of summer
watering-places, who recall the pretentious tastelessness
of foreign hotels and pensions, may pardon her whose
" bone factory and living loom of innumerable growing
tissues" demand a change from the provisions bought at
a low figure by the product of " three or four generations
raised upon east winds, salt fish, and large, white-bellied,
pickled cucumbers," and cooked by his Hoosier wife.

" We had apple-sauce, sour ! ten times in one week, by
actual count ! " says a lively voice at my elbow. " And
awfully stale, sawdusty bread every day, except Satur-
days, when there were warm biscuits for tea. We were
allowed but two apiece — they were not bigger than my
watch ! Mademoiselle announced, hebdomadally, that no
young lady, hien-derk, would think of eating three. I
was hunirry for weeks at a time, having pledged my word
to mamma'that 1 would not buy cakes, nuts, and candy,
which would have taken off the edge of appetite. The

BRAIN-WORK AND BRAIN-POOD. 109

day scholars used to share their luncheons with us and

rule to keen 'ppfiT -'^^'"'^ *^' one-thousand-and-first
Sed of T£ ^^^^^}^\}^ our rooms, but we were deadly

fibrous bee? Zf^"^'''^ '°"^^/^ miscellaneous hash^
fZZvi ^"If'^Perannuated mutton. Evervthinff
tasted like everything else after the first month haS
been brewed by contract, and aU in the sarvat." °^
, u-i K . , ^ disagreeable sense upon her all tbp

mind 'out of b" ^t' "'""" '^ -'*-«" and
mmd, out of school hours as well as in. The beat of

dpfp nl ' f^^ ^Tf ^"^ ^^^""««' her case is yet worse In

Su^lv n?P\ ! •'^^"^^^''''PP^^^*^^' she partakes, consci-

" dLtend;f V ^^f '' 'l^ ^^^""'^ h«^' ^^ Nicholas Nickleby
distended his stomach with a bowl of porridge for mnoK

£-ei;ttMnT t°tl'' ' |,-rT-% h-gry when
1p«,q1v Li!;} lu^ • f . • -^^"^ e^^en hasti y and care-
lessly whie the mmd is absorbed by other and weiXfv
thoughts^ IS seldom perfectly assimilated. ^ ^

" MentafS- "^''Ti^'^^^' ^" ^ thoughtful essay upon
capacit ft nS ""^ r^^''^^^ ^'^^^^'" «»^«ertsthat^ "the

Man-able to think «nrtnlk ov;r M r ""''"/"^^^^^ ^^
^ heat in hislimbl Si;:ji:wi;g toS^^i^T "
bral hemispheres; to sustain, in complete unconscW

i 1'

. »

110

BBAIN-WOHK AND BRAIN-FOOD.

ness, innumerable delicate and complicated chemical
metamorphoses in all the tissues of his body, while con-
centrating every conscious efibrt of his mind upon equally
delicate processes of thought and will."

The accomplished physiologist would, nevertheless,
modify her declaration so far as to exclude from table-
thoughts and talk, subjects so exciting or abtruse as to
engage the full powers of the mind and to stimulate the
brain into liveliest activity.

She draws an eloquent comparison between the " diges-
tive torpor of the savage, analogous to that of ruminating
animals," and " the unconscious digestion of healthy
men of temperate habit and marked intellectual and phy-
sical activity, to whom all hours of the day are nearly
equally suitable for exertion."

.Again : " The process of digestion occupies, from three
to five iiours, but an hour's repose after is generally suffi-
cient to avert discomfort."

Our school girl — hungry or appetiteless — is a growing
animal, with whom, too, as with most of her sex, the ac-
tively-intellectual is likewise the actively-emotional.
With perhaps one exception, that part of her body most
despised by the eager-eyed aspirant for class-honours, is
her stomach. Every mother knows, and every teacher
ought to remember that, at her age, a thorough indiffer-
ence as to what and when she eats, is a symptom of
abnormal torpidity of the ganglionic nerves — those which
carry on the work of digestion, blood circulation and
respiration — of abnormal excitement of the cerebro-
spinal system. What Mamie does not taste consciously,
she will hardly digest unconsciously. Upon this truism
is based the protest of our most intelligent physicians
against the American early dinner for men of active busi-
ness habits. Fifteen minutes of the hour's " nooning " is
consumed by the rapid run homeward — half an hour at
moat to deglutition (mastication rankinof amon" the lost
arts) — and the laden stomach is heated into mutiny by

BRAIN-WORK AND BRAIN-FOOD.

interruption from the Te,^ of Z ir'*™' «"tance or
counting-house or office atmfl "'*■ "''"' ""-ought the
clothes his soul ii 7^ wSK "P '"^ ^'* ''"".and
»I>aU have more to'sa" b^fnd C'' °" ""» "-1 1

orp£ges-&^^^^^

^^.-^iti~rS^^^^

know people who cannorib de^'/T '"'l'^"'^"^- ^"^ I
odour is offensive Clearlv T>, ' *.'' "^^^"^ <^l^e very

phates from somethinreS'" ^^ """'^ ^^'^^ ^^h^i'' Phos^

sincer^lf:erol£ thirt, o,M ,ea.

table, and theirlol an" JlnE S^'^ ^^-^^ alined at
subjects of conversation Alex« J r!," » "^"^^ ^^e only
potatoes-and Andre^Wal^en " u ^'"^ "^^ ^^'^^ '"^^^^ed
Elm could live upo^ S^l_and "^m^^^^
much small beer-Ld Henrt 1 '^""u ^^<^*^ *°ok too
papa-and all these peculiaSes h«^' T'^ T^^ ^' ^^^
from s,^ or othL of S^nei^^r ^^^^^ *« them

^^^^e^T^'^^^^ Wlf over.

itZsu^lti^^^^^^^^^^^^

menu, she ne^ed 1 paS^per inTT'?'"* °^ *he family
While she inculcatesC^Sr;"^"^^ -'f 1^ ^"^^ ^him.^
Hbletoeat anything served h!? -r''^^^"*^ *'*" ^^'^S
- demand or^eSt ^:^i^:^t^^^

i ^jm^

112

BRAIN-WORK AND BRAIN-FOOD.

in the mouth shall become kindly chyle in the stomach.
When the girl comes in from school, heated or exhausted
by the labour of the forenoon, brain throbbing and pulse
high with feverish unrest, or languid to her finger-tips in
the reaction of spent forces, the watchful guardian gives
her cheerful quiet, and when these and a cool bath of
hands and face have reduced temperature and pulse, sets
before her for lunch some wholesome delicacy " that the
child likes."

" Do you always eat so little ? " aslj^ed I, once, of a
beautiful girl, who had been my vis-a-vis at a dinner-
party.

" Seldom more, I think ; I am fresh from boarding-
school, you know; Most girls get out of the habit of
eating at such places."

" You dined to-day, on three spoonfuls of soup, half a
cracker, an olive and a bunch of raisins," pursued I, sur-
veying the rounded cheeks and brilliant bloom. She
was very dear to me, and ] could not forbear the remon-
strance. " My child ! do you know that such fare will
injure the coat of your stomach ? "

" The stomach is what Carlyle calls it — a diabolical
machine," she returned lightly. "If I could lose mine
entirely, in addition to ruining it, I should be happy to
renounce it and all its works. It and its appurtenances
are a vile clog upon human happiness and human pro-
gress. A regular ' meal,' comprising soup, fish, meat,
vegetables and dessert — invariably gives me a headache
and flushes my face painfully. I am never hungry, and
thrive excellently well without eating."

At twenty-five, when she should be in the prime of
womanly beauty and vigour, she is a prey to chronic
neuralgia and frequent carbuncles — the sure indices of
povei'ty of blood. Her bloom has gone and her buoyant
spirits are depressed by the dread of permanent invalid-
ism. She is, also, a confirmed dyspeptic, — " a mysterious
dispensation," — she remarks with a ghostly show of her

BRAW-WOKK AND BIUIN-TOOD. Jjg

fo™orgayety.-.,to onewho never ate heart/ly i„ her

\ might multiply this iIlii«f..o+-

variations, by scores --a 1 „ ''r^'^"' ^^th unimportant

nutritive organs I am L "^°" *^' neglect of the

tion to this^matter bS^ause even'^^';;' ^" '''''^^ -««-

pists as Drs. Clarke andTcobi wrV ""''' Ph""lanthro-

jectof girls' education from J;^""''*'"^ "P«" the sub-

'^rguingably, both urging conc?;i;\"^^ both

reverence for the keen irT^S T"'^ ^^'^^ command our

have led them to convict on V-^^ ^ -'"'"' """'^''^ '^^^
upon a defect so serbus ' ^^'"^^ ^"<^ ^ P^'^^S word

and dying with delight oTthe^eiinT "".^^ ^ ^''«^«.
who, m exalting one'^divL^on of W^ l|Ps of her Over-
ture, leaves the other two Tn.° ^^",?» « Tripartite Na-
Mrs. Putnam- Jacobi'7 ^^P^'^^^^^ shadow.

that deserve^ntatto bS^^^^^^ ^t^^'l ^^-^^
" Unless the brain and sdSI^^ FI^T ^^^^-^cters.
exhausted, or on the point T^hnZr^'''^ ■^'"'^ «^^'««^y
^nstrjMil crisis, il^CZr./ ^IT^T ^'T^^'"' *<> the
haust them." ' ^^"^"^ he insufficient to ex-

-tt'nTf ^rfchat^?.^^^ r.r" --^-t^i ob.

normal conditions Is needed Vn '^'f ^^"" disturbance of
th.. to cause painful rutLn"""'^'' '^^^^^^^^ P-nful

ter, phosphates, nerve-force-even f ,^^°°^' ^^P^se mat-
nous " circumvolutions of VeTlH "P«^the«myste-
the cerebral hemispheres EJ^**"'' ?" *^« «»rf"ace of
to be avoided a« sediiSlv • ?f' ^°^ ^'^^^^ here are
from the pre-eminen , fe,^lt-^ which!

given It by illiterate as by learned

114

BRAIN-WORK AND BRAIN-FOOD.

men and women, is known by the generic term of " Irre-
gularity."

The fable of the " Belly and the Members " needs repe-
tition and enforcement in the hearing, not of Silas Peck-
ham, but of the parents who consign tender girls, with
unformed habits and wayward fancies, to such as he and
his "coarse-fibred" partner. Fable and physiological
application should be pressed home upon the conscielices
of the ardent students who think to deify Intellect by
" keeping the body under."

It is a duty to eat, and to eat nourishing food. To
effect his end let mothers, first — the keepers of feeding-
establishments, second, — study what is wholesome and
what innutritions, and order their tables by the know-
ledge thus gained.

For example, salt fish, corned and smoked meats are
less digestible and less juicy than fresh, and therefore less
healthful. Salted herrings, mackerel, and ham, as break-
fast-dishes, may stimulate appetite, but could not carry
the stomach comfortably over the gap that intervenes
before dinner or lunch unless by help of the liquid im-
bibed to quench the thirst they create. There is no
nourishment worth mentioning as such in water, and little
in tea and coffee beyond that found in the sugar and
cream mixed in the cup. By filling the stomach— dis-
tending it, after the manner of Dotheboys Hall porridge
— they do prevent or postpone the contraction of muscles
which produces the sensation of hunger and faintness.
This sop (slop ?) thrown to Cerberus contributes nothing
toward the general good. Nature is not mocked, in the
sense of deceived, by the trick, any more than she is pro-
pitiated by the blunting of a healthy appetite by sweets.
She will have— not her pound— but her many pounds of
flesh. She resents, if slowly, yet surely, the continual
borrowings of " tissues," the neglect of her appeals for
bone-and-blood material.

BHAIN-WORK AND BRAm-FoOD. ^g

Never, unless forced in if «„* .< i

ankle the deadly fain nL„r pit ' " 7""'"'"^ ™st or
nuWt ve macIiinB ;",,*' "' extreme hunMr. If til

ready for ^oTe food '''^'"'"■ly. " will le regularl

Mra. Gaslceli mves >i« tn . -
written to her #Si4 tme fr """, ^^"""'"^ Bronte,
waf ^siting her publisher ' "■" ^°'"^"». W"-™ she

stance., o^? exSZf bJtT™",?''" T"°^ '"'<' ""-eum-
-.nenta nain, I mean. It th, ™ *""'! P.?'" """-o'taes
presented Simself, I w^^ thnm^^M "'?*•"' *'"■• Thackeray
having eaten netting inee a vtl^ 'y't ^1°"' '"""i""-^
■t was then seven o'cloekin thf-^ ^^'" ^"-eakfast, and
and exhaustion made stva4 *rk''T"'*^\.^™'«™«»'

her q«tclrThtt,:'lr «'-'--■''>-"'■ an
enough of her bodily eoZositZt™' 'i'? /»' «n»'-ant
quences of inanition for °7en tr„,-° '^"'^'"' ">«' "nse-
for the greater Dart, nf ti, . P'"" —had " been ot,t

eheon-hfur at C friend's "w"'" tI.'- ■»--<! the lun-

ATanrwi^HrtV'^'f '" ''' "" "

Sn eSrrit^iiEjt."^^^^^^^^^

as they are unchristian Oh?iT T *■' "nwholeaom»
nutate well, and to" waltowfrowl? tT ^"^ ^*"o
adv,sablew,th her whose CnSlionJrMrbrnrJt

V< I'*

jf. I\

•'I II

1 1 1

116

BRAIN-WORK AND BRAtN-FOOD.

walk, instead of a run, and who passes less than one-third
Tf the time in the open air that her brothers do. That a
school 01 college-boy is " hollow down to the heels, is a
^tv^rb'tre Sth Ji which no mother w^ll gamsay. Nov
would she alter the fact thus expressed had she the power
Tdo it Even the Billickins of a college-town is dis-
auieted if herlodger has what she would call a " peaking
annetlte ■' She may have no other human interest m his
Sae than the natural desire that he may so far pros-
per in woiMly affairs as to be able to pay her weekly bill

Ct loss of rf^^^-:^^-^^^

r wLT Bia- reTtUt^ble o^f the " Young Ladies'
arute'^ is neither surprised nor -e^y^-^s she
hoarders " Dlav with, or reject, their food. JNor has sne
tr^re^umptlve right to insist that the scanty modicum
of p'roSs they do accept and condescend to swalW
shall not be raisins, pies, and pickles. T^o girl wtio
onenlv enioys bread-and-butter, milk, beefsteak and po-
£s and thrives thereby, is the ob ect oi many a cov-
^fsneer, or overt jest, e'ven in these sensible days and

^""fXti^n^l^e tone of her nerves by a cup of
coffee a^dsutafus tL organ of which she is ashamed by
rmo;se?of toast, lifted tl; listless lips by a dain y th^^mb
and forefinger, and barely nibbles a strip of boiled ham ;
who rSa bon-bon box in her pocket into the school-
room and has a private bottle of olives in her desk to
reDe feintness," is " interesting " in the eyes of her
Uttle court^a soulful creature who looks as it she fed on
'^r Whatever her elders may think, the f P»lay^^^^^^
mentofher congeners encourages her m the cultivation
S the fragility which is our national curse, and should
be her own and her parents' sorrow.

■i '

I !1

CHAPTER IX.

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

" The great duty of the Educator is to place his wheel bo that the stream
will fill its buckets ciw/i'.— Edna !>. Cheney.

Our girl, being " at least sixteen, and in good health,"
what shall she study ?

An arrow-flight of catalogues, a bombardment of pri-
vate letters answers the question.

FRESHMAN YEAR.

Greek. Merry's Horner's Odyssey. Tlcree hours a
week.

Latin. Lincoln's Livy. TJtree hours a week.

Mathematics. Loomis's Algebra. Three hours a
week.

Biblical Study. One hour a vjeek for the last six
weeks.

Lectures on "the Idea of a College. One hour a
week for first eight weeks.

Elocution, Lectures and Exercises. One hour a

week.

Electives.

punctuation and orthoepy.

English Literature. From Chaucer through the
Elizabethan Dramatists.

118

WHAT S^WAT-L OUR OIRL STUDY ?

I .

eXT' ^'"■^'' "°"''''" ^'^y^'^y- ^''^ ^hmcian
Latin. Selections from Livy.
Courses in Art and Music.

Or—

freshman year.

First Semester.

Setl'lette^l'"'''- ^' ^'^'^''^ ^^ ^' Senectuie, and
net^Xn'^t^y" ^^^^'^ ^^-rsity Algebra. Chauve-
D^l^"^ '"^ ^''''"'" Composition. Elements of
With Electives of German and Fjench.

Or — (again) .

freshman year.
Mathematics. Olney's Solid Geometry. Olnev's
Plane Tngononietry. Olney's University Algebra Pt^
l^RENCH. Litterature Franoaise Contempora'ne DicJ
tdes, Compositions et Exeicices Grammaticaux

I.ERMAN. Schiller Jungfrau von Orleans. Wilhelm
Tell. Di3 P.ccolomini. Schiller's Leben Essavl i^
German, and German Prose Composition ^

Chemistry, with Laboratory Practice
History. English Literature. Essa> Wjutinq
Drawing. Freehmvi, Mathematical ^ndr,r,pe^^^^ -
Or — (still again)
first year.
Cicero de Senectute.
Arnold's Latin Prose Composition.
Olney's Algebra.
Ancient Hi,story.
Dalton's Physiology.

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

119

Nichols' Introduction to History of the Bible.

Giay'.s Botany.

Hart's Rhetoric.

Bible : Genesis, Exodus, The Gospels.

English Compositions.

We have profound respect for Mary (Mamie no longer)
m transcribing the list. We are even conscious of an
elevation of self-respect when wo have written it. As
Dick Steele said of Lady Hastings that " to love her was
a liberal education," we seem, in some abstruse mode —
absorption through the mental pores, perhaps— to have
grown wiser in handling the materials and utensils by
which Mary is to be cultivated. By a ludicrous per-
versity of associated ideas to which women are subject
at the most inconvenient seasons, we recall in the re-
perusal of the page, the aptly-named Mr. Meek's thrill of
awe upon seeing the announcement in The Times ■
" Births— Mns. Meek, of a son."

" I had put it in myself, and paid for it, but it looked
so noble that it overpowered me. As soon as I could
compose ray feelings, I took the paper up to Mrs. Meek's
bedside.

" w*"^ '^^^^' ^^^^ ^''y°^ *^re now a public character !'
"We read the review of our child, several times, with
feelings of the strongest emotion."

Consf ance Gary Harrison, in " Woman's Handiwork in
Modern Homes," introduces a charmingly absurd dialogue
between a nothing-if -not-artistic pair over a "newly-
acquired six-mark tea-p , j."

" Is it not consummate," asks the masculine Postle-
thwaitian.

•' It is indeed ! Oh, Algernon ! do let us try to live up
to it ! •' r

As a mother, and as a familv, ■^'•ou feel the com'-alsion
upon your souls to live up to' the girl who" can inter a
college, the outermost court of which is guarded by such

120

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

!' 1

chevaux de frlse of " Examinations insisted upon in all
work, required or elective."

Mary's home preparation for her new sphere has been,
■we will take it for granted, judiciously conducted. You
have not needed the drily significant paragraph in the
Wellesley circular :

" Girls are often allowed to make the dangerous mis-
take of overworking in order to fit in a short time. This
is as injurious to scholarship as it is to 'lealth. All cram-
ming preparation is worthless."

There is no expediency— you say it thankfully— in
your dwelling doubtfully or sadly upon a sentence or two
on the next page of the circular catalogue :

" Students in delicate health will not be received. The
College will not be responsible for invalids. If the colle-
giate education of girls lie an experiment, it must not be
tried upon those who are broken down by violation of
the laws of Nature. Such a trial would be useless, and
failure inevitable."

^ Candid and sensible, if stern ! Wellesley is also Wel-
lingtonian in spirit and utterance.

Mary, then, is well, strong, and a passable scholar for
her years. Not— or it would be unfair to select her as a
type— remarkable for quickness of apprehension or close
application. She is as little of a prodigy as of an igno-
ramus. But she has a good mind and an earnest desire
to make the best of herself. Were she Humphrey Davy,
John Stuart Mill, or an archangel, she could have no
higher aim. To score another point in her favour (excuse
the technicality !) she is beginning to enjoy Work for
Work's sake. Difficulties are becoming a stimulus instead
of a discouragement. She revels in the grapple and
wrestle with a tough task, and is sanguine of victory.
In short, the healthy mind in a healthy, well-fed, and
well-kept body is growing symmetrically, "without hurry,
without worry." She is growing, moreover, in spiritual
insight, and in sagacious calculation of means and ends,

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

121

of expenditure and result. In a year — perhaps in less —
she will put questions to, and hold arguments with, you,
that you will do well to prepare yourself to meet. Just
now, her motto is that of youth : " Large profits and
quick returns." She likes to stand well in her class
because it is the business of the day and hour ; because
she has caught the excitement of competition from others
striving at her side and beyond her, and there is real,
positive pleasure in " knowing things." She runs well,
with no signs of distress or discontent.

But you, if you have never until now gone deeply into
the study of the problem of Woman's Education, are
tempted into gravity of meditation and profound specu-
lation which hold your eyes waking by night, plunge you
into day-reveries that leave a deepening stratum of soli-
citude. You are prudent and fat-sighted if you have
answered for yourself and to your satisfaction the query
with which your daughter at length approaches you, her
most trustworthy confidante.

She has had, we will assume further, if not class honours,
the sincere respect of preceptors and fellow-students. The
triumph of having passed the preliminary tests and being
a college student in very truth, the thrill and strain of
the race, even t^ ecstasy of excelling in this or that
contest, have Icou their novelty. If success does not pall
upon her, she is used to it, and can look beyond the
radiant area with eyes whose range is lengthened by
practice and which have become accustomed to the light.
The subsoil ploughing of her mind tells in her present state
of perplexity and longing. She has her studies so well
in hand as not to be daunted in the prospect of the for-
midable curriculum of the next semester. She believes,
she states, modestly, that she will be able to hold her own
throughout the course.

" That is, 1 o^n learn the lessons and pass the examina-
tions. But when I have been graduated 1 sliall be, at the
best, only well smattcred. Look for yourself, and judge

fe . ^IJ

J ( I

122

.WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

if in four years' time I can be anything more. There are
not enough days and hours in the forty working months
ot that tune (there are no more, leaving out the vacations)
in which to become proficient in German, French, Latin'
Greek, the higher Mathematics— think of Analytical
Geometry and the Differential Calculus, Chemistry As-
tronomy, Botany, all English Literature and the cream of
the literature of other tongues— and Music ! The utmost
I can hope for is a specious veneer— perhaps only a hi^h
overglaze of the surface. And I do want to be thorough!
" Or, if we look further, when I leave school it will not
be possible for me to keep up all these studies as I am
doing now. It follows that even the important know-
ledge I am gaining of some of them is only acquired for
the sake of losing it. Will not the dropped stitches show
in the finished web ? If not, where is the use of knitting
them in the first place ? A wise builder does not construct
tor the sake of pulling down. Assuming that it were
possible to devote ten hours a days for the rest of our ex-
istence to keeping what I have acquired— and the range
IS so wide that I could hardly do more— what then ?

" Don't call me absurd when I confess that 1 am haunted
continually by the comical dilemma of the gushing youno-
thing in Hood's 'Fudge Papers' who breaks of in her
irregular ode at

" ' Bring me from Hecla's iced abode
Young fire '

and complains to her Kitty —

'"I had got, dear, thus far in my Ode,

Intending to fill the whole page to the bottom,
But having invoked such a lot|of fine things.
Flowers, billows and thunderbolts, rainbows and wings

Uidn t know what to do with 'em when I had got 'em.' '

" Mamma !" laughing and blushing, while the eyes do
not lose their troubled look, " am 1 to be Miss Fudire
forever ? " ®

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

123

You do not deserve to be this young creature's natural
parent if you are inclined, for one moment, to (leal with
this honest, wholesome cui bono ? as with girlish farracro
Mental restlessness, when it takes this turn, is progress"
Your girl meets you now with level gaze ; proves her-
self, perhaps for the first time, to be your equal and
comrade. Her life is no longer an offshoot of yours It
has taken root for itself.

Disabuse her mind in the beginning of your reply of
the idea so easily conceived at her age, that hers is a
peculiar state of feeling and that her difficulties are ex-
ceptional. Commend her courage in looking them full
in the face, and explain of what J-er uneasiness is the symp-
tom. Then, talk with her, as ttachers seldom have time
to talk with their pupils of the specific effect of the study
of worthy subjects upon the intellect. If you do not say
as did a learned Piofessor in one of our Theological Semi-
naries, that a man can plough nearer to a stump without
grazing it for having had a collegiate education, you may
yet borrow one part of his figure, and show that all of
cultivation is not sowing seed which will yield a harvest
in kind. The ploughshare and hoe that open the soil to the
benehcence of air, sun, dew, and rain, expose vircrin
elements to be chemically changed by these into suste-
nance for what shall hereafter be cast 'into the mellowing
earth ; the fertilizers scattered liberally .upon the ground
and dug patiently into it— the raking and harrowing
even the burning out of weedy growth— what would agri-
culture be without a wise comprehension and application
of these methods ?§ Mary may not " keep up" her Latin
alter she leaves school, and her German may, from the
same date, become to her as truly a dead language. But
she will write and speak her mother .ongue the better
tor haying learned the one ; the breadth and grasp of her
mmd be unproved by the study of the other.

It is very possible— altogether probable— that in her
future experience she will have little use for any branch

» . := II

124.

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

of Mathematics higher than the Four Rules of Arith-
metic, with a semi -occasional need of Fractions, and a
demi-semi-occasional reference to the Rule of Three.
But she will bear the daily vexations, as well as the
great trials of life more bravely for the firm grain of
thought, the habit of patience, the impartial weighing
of evidence, the submission to the sustained verdict of
the quotient, without which there can be no success in
mathematical study. That the husbands and children
of educated women are ignorant of their obligations to
the Differential Calculus, is no more an argument against
a knowledge of it than the indifference of the epicure,
who enjoys his breakfast rolls without a thought of the
manifold labour wrought into their production, proves the
inutility of agricultural arts.

The discipline of the school is invaluable in a country
where the status of the Home is so often altered by the
changing tides of fortune, the fluctuations of Mamma s
health, and servants' humours and defections. If your
girl brings away nothing from her college after her grad-
uation, beyond what is usually ranked as a good common
school education, you have not paid too dearly for the
benefit to her of systematic lines of thought ti-aced over
and over again until they are grooves not easily choked
up, or worn away; for the familiarity with the best
works of master minds ; the breathing upon the heights,
unconsciously though it ' may be, of purer, more bracing
airs than ever Teach the lungs of the bustling herds upon
the plain.

This much, and all too little, for the indirect influences
of scholastic training.

While freely conceding that the graduate from any
one of the eminently respectable institutions from whose
catalogues I have quoted, is likely, we will say in eight
cases out of every ten, to be, as Mary puts it, " merely
well-smatteied," 1 submit that the popular objection to
the curriculum as unpractical, applies with equal perti-

WHA.T SHAtL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

s of Arith-
ions, and a
I of Three.
well as the
m grain of
il weighing
i verdict of
3 success in
ad children
ligations to
lent against
the epicure,
ight of the
., proves the

u a country
ered by the
f Mammas
s. If your
;r her grad-
lod common
irly for the
traced over
sily choked
;h the best
the heights,
ore bracing
herds upon

t influences

! from any
from whose
say in eight
it, " merely
)bjection to
3qual perti-

12.')

to Boys'

nence lo Doys Uolleges and Universities

I dare assert also that the majority of girls, whosi stan':

creditable w^r'^^P "' .^'"'^'u^^' ^«^^^^' «^ "^^'^^ ^^
Zth.rt' T'^^T ^^^ourabiy upon graduation-day

^ZrT' • • T ^%f^^^li^rity with text-books and the
general principles of what has been taught in the regular

li^TJ""A,y.^\ '? ^^'y'' ^^"^^^^ over the dro|ped
till ' f °'^ Jeremiads that women do not keep

up their acquaintanceship with languages and the exact
sciences after quitting school, I would inquire what p?S-
portion of college-bred men-unless led to do so bv the
current demands of their professions-continue their
classical and scientific studies, con amove, when Com-

"fTeTast Trr""»^ '7 ^!^^. «"^^ " E^ " -^ ^^^ngs
ot the past. The lawyer's Latinity is perverted by the

jargon of the courts; the physician is limited to a few

phrases m Materia Medica, Libbled on prescriptions foT

the n;y;t^fif tion of the patient and the^onv Sence of

the druggist, whose gallipots are similarly labelled; and

the clergyman s reading, in whatever tongue, is toi apt

to be confined to works that have a direct bearin<. upon

the practice of his calling. As for the graduate! who

embark upon he hurrying tide of American business

hfe, what remains at the end of ten years to show that

enfa'nam.! '^'V^ ^S^ "^''i ^^^^^"^ ^^«» --"s ex
nrlf V nf ™.- !'' Something-which is not altogether pro-
plnZ- • 'I' f^ ''°'" ''^'■^''' mtonations that betrav the
Iearn.r''V '^fi'^^"^' l'^ ^ ^^'""S for the society of the
part of thpin "'^' '^^ ^r^^'"^"^ appreciatio/on the
fnto whS ^'^i^'.r^ Something, as potent as indefinable,
Szed^ r/M''''^ constituents enter and are harmo^
nized ? Ridicuk and analyze " culture " (in Boston "cult-

ttfin^dr^lbTIl^^tnLT^^ ^:^^^^ ^-^^ '''' '' *

T^ '-_ic3i.il -)H,i>ie suouc predencu that is Uie soirit of thp
Free-Ma^on.c Order of Gentlehood the world iioind.

1. s

12G

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

1 111

' p

I ;

I li;

i 11::

:■ i

^11 i
1 i

IM i

;

Clouded by poverty, crushed by disgrace, dwelling in
forms that have little other likeness to the universal
brotherhood of Grace and Beauty, it yet manifests itself
to the answering spirit by evidence not to be gainsaid,
declares its rights and its powers unequivocally and
everywhere, having for seal and watchword the legend :
" The Kingdom of Heaven is withiit you."

This is not saying that a college course for man or
woman will secure fellowship in this privileged Order,
or that the lack of a generous education will be an abso-
lute disqualitication for membership. But in our country,
at least, a thorough, many-sided, intellectual training,
with the tastes it inspires and nourishes, and the asso-
ciations it secures during the term of acquisition, is the
" Open Sesame " to this and to so many other doors be-
hind which is treasure, as to justify the value attached
to Education, and dignify the sacrifices made to secure it
— or its semblance — by those who are incapable of es-
teeming it aright because of its intrinsic value. Of its
higher uses, the altogether-loveliness of the realm, to
which the delightsome labour of learning is the way and
gate, it is not now my business to write at length.
When, in the fast-coming years, laden with fruit, as now
with bud and flower, your girl shall have gauged the
depth of meaning in George Herbert's rapturous boast : —

" My mind to me a Kingdom is ! "

her " Cui bono t " of the Sophomore year will seem to
her thvi chatter of a witless child. For this you can af-
ford to wait with the calm patience of the husbandman
who, having committed precious seed to prepared soil,
expects the gracious latter rain that is to complete, upon
the swelling furrows the work begun Iqp' spring showers.
Music and Painting should always f^ classed among
the " Electives " of the school or college course. If Ma-
ry really loves music — (mere liking will not do ! ) has a
fine ear and, it may be, a good voice, do not hesitate to

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ? 127

cultivate the talent to the extent of your opportunities
and pecunmry ability. That she should g^?S at he

i hef[LfrP'"''^'v.^ T^''. ^"^ ^'^«^"««« ^« ^ natural
Terbs rfh. T/'^^^^^" slow complications of French
verbs or the arbitrary committal to memory of the Mul-
tiphcation-table. Take care that she is not flattered into

iknaol r'"^^'-'TP?"^ "^ y«"°g women who mistake
a knack for manipulation, and a happy "catch " of ear for
musical genius. Thanks to the besom of Common Sense

fhifXZT' '-^''^'^i ^'^'^ by critic and instruc" ,' "
this plague of singing locusts has measurably abated

TotaWv^in'^n"' — "^' ',"' '•' '' ^^^" ^^ active nuisance,
notably m provincial districts. It is not likelv that

WLT li 'T '^ "?^^ .'^^^ ^ f-^ parlour^erSer in'
iues? of th. T'' 'r'/^'i' ^ passion, with the con-

in^'lt^^^'V^^-'^"'^-"^^: ^^ '^^^ *^^ *he <^aste for draw-
ing and colounng-mtelligent appreciation of science
and execution is best learned by study of both The
practical amateur-I coin the phrase that I may have a
contradistinctiye to « prof essional " and to "diKnte"
—the practical amateur, in becoming the connoisseur
creates the popular sentiment with regard to arti^tTper:
formances, for the very simple reason that he knows

JicaZ of Ifrf '• ^ ^^T^'^^ance that cannot be prT
dicated of aU art-censors whose fulminations are received
as the combined sentiments of all the Graces and a
gentee majority of the Muses. A just and pure ?aste
Som?'?^'^'"^?'"'^"^^ ^''""'^S' -Architecture andt

profit t^o SLr^^L tth r^s "IT,'' f ^^'^^^^ r

cated up to this points fa^L^f aSfe^^^^^^

and execution will be raised into excellence far C

flf

:■ T' 7 t

i
; 111

128

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

scending the most sanguine anticipations of the votaries
of the Beautiful.

Without natural bias, or aptitude for any one of the
Fine Arts, she who is forced to spend a given number of
hours per diem in the study of it, is oppressed, and has
just grounds for protest against the tyranny of custom.
Without the inner sense of harmony, there is nothing
more refining to the learner in the metrical manipulation
of the key-board of a grand piano than in the purposeless
tapping of the same fingers on a tin pan. If your boy
longs to understand the theory and undertake the prac-
tice of music, he is defrauded should the opportunity be
withheld from him. The same male obtains with your
girl, with neither more nor less stringency. You can not
manufacture taste and talent to order for either. The
pencil and the brush also belong to him as much as to
her, whether as a serious pursuit or pleasing recreation.
This is very plain common sense and bare justice. The
active violation of the principle will turn out mechanical
art-students, as like genuine disciples as are the split and
flattened flowers and fruits of the conventional school to
the grace of outline and rich colouring of Nature.

The prominence given to " accomplishments " in the
education and thoughts of women is unquestionably one
of the reasons, if not the chief, why the attempt to make
them equal in intellectual culture to men, so often results
in meretricious veneer and glaze. So much time, so much
nerve-power, so many " cells," — all consumed in compass-
ing one end and that a trivial one, must draw proportion-
ably upon the amount requisite to gain other and far
more important results.

Mary E. Beedy. in a paper upon " Girls and Women in
England and America" makes a " telling " point of this.

" So long as girls require from one hour and a half to
three hours a day t<5 be, or to develop themselves into the
conventional girl, and boys require only about one-third
of that time to get themselves up into the conventional

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

129

pattern for a boy, girls must either be superior to boys to
begin with or they must economize their powe'r better if
they are able to do as much school- work in a year as boys.
Ihat IS, if girls must consume power in all the ways that
constitute the approved specialities of girls, they can not
do the whole work of boys without doing much more than
boys do.

• ^^ ^^^^^^ .P,^^*^ °^ *^® ^^^^ ^^^^y s^e gives a hint that
IS worth considering. She is assuming the operation of a
system of co-education.

^ "It would be well, too, to give more credit to the spe-
ciahties of girls in the schools. I can think of nothincr
else that would conduce so much to the thorough and
satisfactory study of music as to give it<in optional place
in our school-curriculums."

• ^ ^ j®°v' ^ ^^^^^ o^ vigorous intellect and marked
individuality, hands me a curious calculation apropos to
this matter of misdirected energy.

" For ten years I took— or there were given to me—
two music lessons a week, at an average cost of one
dollar per lesson. We will set down that, in round num-
bers, as one thousand dollars in all. For the same time
1 practised conscientiously, winter and summer, two
hours a day. Leaving out Sundays and almost a fort-
night per annum for sickness and other hindrances we
have six hundred hours of musical work for each year—
an aggi-egate of six thousand for the ten. That is two
hundred and fifty days of twenty-four hours each of solid
toil without mitigation or solace. I ground out exercises
and sonatas as a blind horse turns a treadmill, with
the added torture of feeling all the while that it was
uniadyhke and almost unchristian not to love music.
The varied harmonious numbers others profess to enjoy
were no more to me than the rattle of the grains in the
hopper, or the crunch of the clay under the wheel is to the
sightless brute,

130

WHAT SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

" When I became a free agent — i. e., when I married
a man who does not know one tune from another, and
is not ashamed to confess it, I turned my back forever
upon the piano-forte, which had been to me from my
ninth year, peine forte et dure. I wish I could have
brought my unmusical husband the thousand dollars
wasted upon my misery. I wish more earnestly that I
had something worthy to show for eight months ot bhe
hardest work I ever did in my life."

When the full head of the stream is directed into one
bucket, others must whirl emptily in the grand round,
and the balance of the wheel itself be dpstrcved.

I!
fi.

' i

s^i

CHAPTER X.

FACE TO FACE WITH OUR OlRL.

" Ab to direct physical care of themHelves, American girla between four-
teen and twentv-one are to be ruled only through their own oonviotionH on
the side of prudence, for they will not blindly obey what seem to them ar-
bitrary rules, as the girls of 8omu other nations can be easily made to do."—
Anna C, BKACKEir.

Miss Brackett is a successful teacher, and a woman of
wide culture. She observes carefully, thinks deeply, and
has the enviable talent of imparting the product of ob-
servation and thoughts to others. Accepting, as I do,
the above extract as true in all its sections, it behooves
me in continuing my familiar talk with my country-
women to address myself directly to the girls themselves.

This is a grateful necessity. My heart warms and my
eyes grow moist as in imagination I seat Mary in the
chair opposite mine, and while trying to set forth to her
that it is a sacred duty from which no quibble can ab-
solve her, to be merciful to herself, just to her sex, and
gracious to her generation, harken willingly to her rea-
soning and her excuses for objecting to such blind obedi-
ence as infants — or French demoiselles — may yield to
arbiti-ary rules. There is no more engaging creature on
the Father's earth than a young girl who loves purity
and seeks after truth. I doubt if there exists a finite
being who means better than do you, my child. Nor are
there many who so frequently disappoint themselves in
the practical results of their excellent intentions. The
woman's intuitive appreciation of a desirable end ; the

132

FACE TO FACE WITH OUR OIRL.

Sf.

womanly inipatienco of tho slow sequonco of logical
steps, by the use of which this will becoino a le<,ntiriiato
prize,— without which it will Ijo held upon sufferauco, if
indeed it ever becomes your implied poanossion,— these
are, in you, intensified by youthful ardour and inexperi-
ence. You would have loarnod to read without ac(iuiring
the alphabet, if you had had your way, and have a de-
spotic fashion of overleaping preliminaries of all kinds ;
of seeking out and pursuing royal roads to success!
Where the intellect and energies masculine may be con-
trolled by a snatHe-rein and perhaps require the whip,
you need a curb, and a firm, yet kindly hand upon the
ribbons. It is entirely consistent, quite unavoidable,
that this inconsequent impetuosity should prevail in the
conduct of your studies at a period when study is the
business of your life. It is not less natural that being a
woman— and a very young woman- you should be in-
tolerant of human imperfection, contemptuous of human
failures, disdainful, with an imperial scorn, of your own
weaknesses and shortcomings. Your hopes and expecta-
tions of Life may be likened to the sensations of the
dreanier, who finds the act of flying or floating through
the air a foot or two above the earth so easy and de-
lightful, that he wonders—still sleeping— why he has
ever walked, and that all his fellow-mortals do not float.

"All the secret is in making up one's mind to do it,"
be thinks. " Once determined and dared, it is done. In
future my feet shall rarely touch the ground."

Presently he awakes. So will you. Let us hope it
will be gradually.

To come back to Miss Brackett's remark, underlying
which we fancy that we may detect causticity or compli-
ment, as we may consider filial obedience or independent
thought the higher virtue. Your mother has fewer more
difficult tasks than to convince you of the real nature and
value of the kingdom over which you claim the right to
rule. If she holds fast to the sceptre, it is as if she lifted

FACE TO FACE WITH OUR QIRL.

133

a dangerous toy out of tho roach of your baby-hands as
too heavy or sharp for your management. Oneof th(. n'ad-
des Inevitab ;..s among the discoveries of our mi.hlle a.^o
8 the nnpracticabihty of making over to our daughtcMs
the advantages of our own experience, bought with what-
ever outhty of tears and heart's blood, of thrSes and patient

" If thou hadst known, even thou, tho thin<r.s that bo-
bnged to thy peace ! " the n>other apostrophizes W own
wayward youth, while her soul yekrns Jver the brS
repetition of that heyday, embodied in yourself.

It the bitterne^ss of the review of her errors and their
penalty tinges he. admonitions, gives asperity to her
warnings, be patient, and. at least, reasonably docile
The perfection of lung-health is never to feel that you
have lung.s If your incredulity on the subject of physS
Ills proceeds from like blessed immunity from infinn Uy
there IS Uio greateV propriety in making intelligent pro-'
servation ot corporeal sanity a tenet of practiool piety
As a girder to my hope of inducing you to ca.a ration^
ally, because prudently, for the earthen vessel which tho
dear Lord has not deemed unftt to be the receptacle and

helSw.l r' "".1 ""^ ^^"^'^^^^ with^me .ome
helpful words from another woman whose aims are pure
and who clothes thought nobly. ^ '

Frances Power Cobbe writes :

" A great living teacher once made to me the curious
observation that he had noticed that when a woman
was persuaded that anything was right or true she
genemlly tried to shape her conduct and creed accord!

«« 'T^1'^"^^^ ^^^^"^ ^'^^^ ''"™^'' despair), "when I have
as 1 think, entirely convinced a maii in the same way "
and expect to see some results of his conviction, behold !
iie goes on precisely as hfi did befor<- ind «« if -.-i J-^^ ,
had happened," ' ' ^ ^^ o^thiag

I.J

Bi|

t ■ 1 '

mi V

• .

134

FACE TO FACE WITH OUR GIRL.

If the latter clause is slanderous to our brothers, one of
their own sex is responsible for the statement and the
" comic despair."

What interests us more nearly is Miss Cobbe's sum-
ming-up :

" Now, will you not take heart of grace, and thus act
up woman-like to any convictions which I have been
happy enough to bring to you, and evermore, henceforth,
bear in mind that you are not, first, Women, and then,
perhaps, rational creatures, but, first of all, human beings,
and then, secondly, women — human beings of the Mother-
Sex?"

The battle of the books and the rostrum, the papers
and the pulpit, over the education of American girls,
identical co-education ; women's colleges and university-
annexes ; the mental equality of the sexes ; whether
women want the ballot, and if they do, whether they
ought to have it — has raged so hotly for a decade past,
that we have almost forgotten the existence of such ir-
relevant subjects as illiterate Americans, " of the mother-
sex." In collating the statistics of the comparative death-
rates of the Alumnse and Alumni of Oberlin ; counting
the sufferers from " amenorrhoea, menorrhagia, dysmenor-
rhcea, hysteria, anemia, chorea, and the like," among the
graduates of Vassar, Smith, and Wellesley, the coolest of
the contestants have practically overlooked the vast com-
monalty who were never graduated anywhere, or con-
sciously encouraged the growth of their minds. Is it
not fair to give them a hearing before we jump at the
conclusion that there is " No Sex in Education," or that,
such is the number of " permanently disabled graduates,"
that " if these causes should continue for the next half-
century, and increase in the same ratio as they have for
the last fifty years, it requires no prophet to foretell that
the wives who are to be mothers in our Republic must
be drawn froxn traus-atlantic homes ?

FACE TO FACE WITH OUR GIRL.

135

The sons of the New World," continues the eloquent
pessimist we are quoting, « will have to re-act on a maa.

Sabines"*^ ' ""^^ "^"""^ ""^ unwived Rome and &
It would be a sad slur upon our civilization, if, when
we leave out of the question under consideration, the
unfavourable effects of climate, national cookery, and the
tever-heat of our body-politic, commercial and social, it
should still appear that the health of the povertv-
stricken is superior to that of the well-to-do classes.
Ihat the unlearned are physically better men and better
women than those to whom sanitary laws, including
dietetics, are a living principle instead of an unknown
and, therefore, a dead letter. With all our respect for
Ur. (^larke, we, who are mothers and mistresses of fami-
lies, see much m a quarter-century of housekeeping of
city, district-visiting, and country-boarding, to make us
demur at his declaration that "Jane in the factory can
work more steadily with the loom than Jane in the col-
lege with the dictionary; the gii-1 who makes the beds
can safely work more steadily the whole year throucrh
than her little mistress of sixteen who goes to school "''

The farmers' wives of New England— the New Eng-
land, where, as Dr. Mitchell tells us.f « the wicked forcing-
system --educational—" is at its wicked worst for both
sexes —the farmers' wives of New England furnish from
their ranks more patients to the insane asylums than do
the fashionable " super-^sthetical " ladies of our gayest
cities. Instead of the ruddy, portly dames that rock and
swing up the aisles of the English parish church in the
wake of yeoman-husbands, what is the show of our coun-
try " meeting-houses ? "

"Your vimmin are all too vhite," said Frederica Bremer
m America. " Are none of them veil ? " '

__Wear G all too familiar with iho physiq ue of the repre-

* " Sex in Education," p. 63. '

+ " Wear *nd Tear," by S. Weir MitcheU, M,D., p. 36.

■'F'

136

FACE TO FACE WITH OUR GIRL.

sentative American rural housewife. On Sundays her
week-day haggardness is not relieved by so much as the
smoothing out of a crow's track, or the flushing of the
hollow cheek. The uniform tallowy tint of the com-
plexion, the sunken eyes, the bony frame, more gaunt in
the Sabbatical finery bought with butter-money, than in
her working dress of dark calico — who does not recog-
nise the delightless picture ? The rosy children, whose
vitality has not yet succumbed to pork and pies, empha-
size, and are a mournful satire upon her sallow angularity.
She is " tired to death " all the time, as subject to sick
and nervous headaches as if she had packed a four-years'
college course into every twelvemonth since her "marriage,
and a chronic dyspeptic. Moreover, she is as conversant
with " peculiar complaints " as are her city sisters, often
more cruelly tried by them, for much lifting of heavy
pots and tubs, and overmuch " standing on her feet " (so
she puts it), and the general inaneness of country life
when unrelieved by intellectual resources, add to strain
and weariness, depression of spirit and body, all working
out together the conditions of uterine and spinal diseases.
Whittier saw her in the transformed Maud Muller :

" She wedded a man, unlearned and poor,
And many childrsn played round her door.

" But care and sorrow, and childbirth pain
Left their traces on heart and brain."

You may behold her in as many stages of droop and
decadence by calling for a drink of water at a dozen
farm-house kitchens in the most prosperous districts of
our highly-favoured land. And, should you be sufficient-
ly zealous in the pursuit of truth to risk the imperti-
nence of spoken inquiry, the chances are that you will
find, if the sphere of search is New England, that
every third woman interrng.ated h not her husband's first
wife. As a provision of political and domestic economy,
it is well that there is an overplus of dying human

FACE TO FACE WITH OUR GIRL.

137

worms of the mother-sex in the Land of the Pilgrims,
while Death and Insanity are in close attendance to pick
up those who, from weakness, stagger out of the march-
ing column.

The same tale, in effect, is told of the corresponding
rank of mechanics' wives, and the daughters of these are
generally about as healthy as the average Maud Muller.
Both— 1 write it without hesitation— are pale and mea- '
gre, by comparison with the opulent citizen's daughter,
whose mother has sent her to bed early throughout her
childhood, fed her judiciously, and obliged her to take
regular exercise in the open air. She studies hard all
winter, wins a prize or two in the third week of June,
and goes off in July to the country for a vacation. She
takes flannel and linen dresses for morning and picnic
wear, and wash muslins for afternoons and Sundays,
wears thick boots, and sports what Maud Muller private-
ly condemns as " a horrid fright " of a broad-brimmed
hat. She lives out of-doors. gets the good of breezes and
sunshine, all the freshness and sweet, bounteous roomi-
ness of meadow and mountain-top.

" It is a wonder what she finds to amuse her, all day
long, in the woods and fields," comments Maud, who is
as feto^ with her monotonous existence as a belle of a do-
zen seasons with balls and receptions.

If %he could live in town, she would never care to see
the country. It is the goody tale of " Eyes and No
Eyes " modernized. ■ Maud sees one field overrun with
red sorrel and wild carrots ; in the next, stately corn-
rows nodding and gleaming under the August sunshine,
and never thinks of tracing the instructive analogy. In
her thoughts and speech " culture " is always prefixed by
" agri — ."

Unless I am greatly mistaken, a majority of my fel-
low-housekeeper.s will endorse my affirmation that the
I' girl who makes the beds " can no longer, at any rate,
in this our day, be accepted as an example of health and

illi

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138

FACE TO FACE WITH OUR GIRL.

strength. In reviewing my experience in regard to her
and her co-labourers, during a period of more than twen-
ty-five years of active housewifery, I am positively ap-
palled at the result of the investigation. In this time
my household force has consisted of never less than two
servants. Sometimes, and for several successive yeai-s,
four have been employed in the various departments of
domestic labour. Among all these, I recall but two who
deserved to be designated as really "healthy girls."
When this circumstance was forced upon my attention
some months since , I made a careful list of those who
had remained in my service long enough to afford me the
opportunity of judging of their general health. The
record lies before me now. There are twenty names in
all. Eight were Americans (five of these were coloured),
one Scotch, the rest Irish. Two of these were inmates
of my house for eight years, one for six, four for three.
But three whom I have registered lived with me for a
shorter period than twelve months. All were stead-^,
sober, and industrious to an uncommon degree — as Ame-
rican domestics go— keeping regular hours, and addicted
to no stronger beverage than unlimited tea.

Here let me say, and with gratitude, that I believe my
experience with servants has been, and is exceptionally
pleasant, if all I hear from others of insubordination,
dishonesty, and evil habits be true. I have tried always
to guard the health of the women employed by me, as I
have my own and that of my daughters, and it is no less
an flct of justice to a much-enduring class than an expres-
sion of personal good- will, to record my testimony to the
affectionate attention bestowed in return upon me and
mine when the hour of trial overtook us. I digress yet
further from our main topic to remark to the discouraged
or disgusted housekeeper that the acknowledged faults of
the class do not absolve us from the discharge of our
duties to them as their superiors in moral and mental
training.

FACE TO PACE WITH OtJIl GIRL.

139

It may help us in the examination of the causes of the
reported invalidism of educated women to look somewhat
minutely into a few of the cases of these comparatively
iUiterate ones. In humble, unprofessional imitation of
Dr. Clarke's " Part III., I have written down the details
that follow this. The reader will please accept in exte-
nuation of what may bore her the maxim borrowed from
the head of this division of our esteemed physician's
work :

" Facts given in evidence are premises from which a
conclusion is to be drawn. The first step in the exercise
of this duty is to acquire a belief of the truth of the
facts."

A , l3orn in the north of Ireland, came to Canada

at three years of age, married at nineteen, and had one

child. Her husband died before its birth, and A

went out to service as a wet-nurse. Her child was three
years old when the mother came to me to take care of an
infant and do light chamber-work. In less than four
months she fell violently ill. Symptoms, terrible pain
in the head, delirium, spasmodic twitchings of limbs.
The physician's visit revealed the fact that she had been
" irregular " for more than a year. Sometimes there had
been total suppression for several months. She recovered
after several weeks' illness so far as to resume her duties
in the household, but was never really well. Her head-
aches and fainting turns were a source of continual
uneasiness to me, and although she was a faithful, excel-
lent servant, I should not have felt it to be right to retain
her in my nursery, but for the knowledge that she could
not have earned her living elsewhere on account of her
ill-health. It was a great relief to me -hen, at the end
of the third year, she married again and \r'ent to a home
of her own. She had four children after this second
marriage, dying at the birth of the last. During each
pregnancy she was partially insane.

I ill

W.i

: I

140 FACE TO FACK WITH OUR GiRL.

B— I — , Irish by birth. She had been fifteen years in
America when I engaged her as cook and assistant laun-
dress. She was then twenty-five, a confirmed dyspeptic,
and subject every month to excessive " fiow." After each

Eeriod she was anemic and tremulous, and would have been
ysterical but for her strong will. A more honest, upright,
willing girl never carried a diseased frame about her
daily tasks. She would work uncomplainingly, when
nineteen out of twenty women would have been in bed.
She, too, married, in the fourth year of her residence with
me, and sought a home in the far West. In a little over
a year t heard of her death.

C , of Irish parentage, but bor in America. She

was short, stout, with blue eyes and light hair, and
' looked more like a German than an Irish girl. She
could read and write well, was quick of apprehension and
brisk in movement. At twenty-eight she came to me as
waitress and parlour-maid, remaining with me in this
capacity for a year. In this time she had three epileptic
fits—all at night, after days of unusual excitement or
fatigue. The nature of the first seizure she concealed
from me, but after the second, confessed that she had had
many such attacks since the first time she was " unwell,"
which happened in her fourteenth year. She had also
frequent sick headaches and turns of distressing nausea.
Finally she broke down utterly, and left service alto-
gether.

D was a smiling, red-cheeked Irish girl, " ten years

in the country," and twenty-one years old. She was
B — — 's immediate successor in my kitchen, and a thor-
ough contrast to her physically. She had strong black
hair, blue eyes, large limbs, and high colour ; was easy of
temper, obliging, and " not afraid of work," but careful
and troubled about nothing. Her merry laugh, if a trifle
louder than suited the taste of one used to a quiet kit-
chen, was yet irrepressibly contagious. She was with me
two and a half years prior to her marriage. In this time

FACE TO PACE WITH OUR GIRL. I41

m temper, lost colour and strenath and wnc J ^^"^
steadily declining into invalidTsnf if notln /h ""^ "^
consumption, whin she married 'in less ?han ! T ^' f
m.carned with twins In four yea?s sTe w^s d'eaT ^'^

ji,. ^ a brisk coloured sirl awd +l.,v^, i- „

blooded negress strongly a„d^wellSde."'^tlid w I
the work of waitress and parlour-mni-rl Wnf ''"P,^^'^,^©"
the cost of much suffering to hersTlfL^k.r^f*^**^
race, she took cold easily^eingTs suscep^^^^^

the lungs, but ~d^:h\tr:.^^^^^^

She suffered greatly every month from pab ^ncrels^L
into cramps now and then. I have seen h^r wk t at tS?
until she grew as m-ev as ashp<> an,! u 7 at table

ties that she would give up and J^toTd S th!*
oxysms had passed. Her back w£ always wtk tiZ
would, her room-mate told me " crv all V,i^7 i, , ?
not tell why, only .that she wis s? lolsririted .' wl"
the "seasons" were upon her. She could "^work'teL;!
the year through," but invariably staved^^ft ^J^ ^
three or four months when the tem ™ over L ! f^
st.„^gthl.ckbefo.returningtoher:^E,trk!;i'

„i„^^v'tV^S;'a"^n?.'' "" ^'8'" y*-"' fr»-»

She "could do an"thTg"":'d ITrSf Z" 7""^'t"'''
gaged her that she U "'nev:?1>er:^a"3^yTu fe/l it

142

F.' fi TO FACE WITH t)UU GIRL.

and came 'rom good old Irish stock." She had filled
the place to my satisfaction two years, when I gathered
from a talk with her that she was not " unwell " above
once in three months, and then slightly. But she was ■
" never a bit the worse for it. Most of her acquaintances
were onregular in one way or another. The whole mat-
ter was a turrible setback to working gurrls."

Dr. Clarke admits that " female operatives are as re-
gardless of any pressure upon them of a peculiar function
as are their fashionable sisters in the polite world. All
unite in pushing the hateful thing out of sight and out
of mind ; and all are punished by similar weakness, de-
generation, and disease."

Had this poor servant-girl, who could not write her own
name, been, instead^ a disciple of "the New Gospel of
female development,*' she could not have been more
scornful of the mechanism and functions peculiar to her
sex. She spoke of these with bashful reluctance, and
only in reply to my catechism as to the cause of the
headaches that began to trouble her. Two years after
her entrance upon her duties in my family, she was pros-
trated by uterine hemorrhage that threatened her life.
Then she grew dyspeptic, hysterical, uncertain in mood
and temper, a victim to what, in a fine lady, would be
dignified as " vapours " or " nervous depression." She
continued to be " onregular," and remained incredulous to
the physician's declaration that the root of the evil lay
there. Her flesh was no longer firm, nor her cheeks rosy,
and one winter she was disabled for a month by a tumour
on the knee that narrowly escaped development into the
everywhere-and-always-dreaded "white swelling." After
her marriage, and the birth of her first child, she col-
lapsed as completely as a prematurely-disabled graduate
could have done, and is now a peevish, sickly, prema-
turely-old woman, with six puny children pulling at her
slattenily skirts.

FACE TO PACE WITH OUR GIRL. I43

sav^frf „'''■ ""^^i^^^ S^ >'°""^ °^«« ^s always^ilin' i " she
say-i, in a cracked wh ne. " It's nnarp ih^ LTi 1 "
people have ' '' • -it a quaie the bad luck some

thp nr- J*'^ pnyilege and honour to be, for seven years

wonren wh"o^^^^^^^^ ^^"^'^ of practically benevS

women, whose chief business, as managers and members

pressed me more painfully than what Dr ri.,!;! j -u

he^h l!f '.h""' T t"°"' '=»"»«« foi- the failure in

a day the t Si^ ttt trnTretmeXt"!

should work out n Tff f f" mf''^^'^ ^^^6"' and
healthful :U^ut^t-^enr deZd— • t

144

FACE TO FACE WITH OUR OIRL.

higher powers of the intellct^t, approximate so nearly the
works and ways of our sainted, and wher in the flesh,
" hale grandmothers," that the spectacle of kitchen June's
affluent bodily sanity should tempt college Jane to for-
swear the Dictionary, her little Latin, and less Greek, and
take to scrubbing, cooking, and bed-making as the one
hope of physical salvation and restoration of the mysteri-
ous gray flakes that stand with us for mental health.
Whereas, when we come to the examination o.'^' our
"facts," the truth transpires that college Jane and select-
school Mary, cognizant of the jars and grating of house-
hold wheels, because Bridget, or Dinah, or Hannah "is not
well to-day," have studied Baconian induction to little
purpose if they do not settle for themselves the fact that
whatever may be tjhe prime cause of the general
invalidism of their sex, it is not undue mental application.

Being blessed — thanks to Education ! with ears as well
as eyes, — in hearkening to Mamma's talk with another
district-visitor of the health-status of sewing-girls and
the inhumanity of ernployers who coop them up in fetid
rooms for sixteen out of twenty-four hours, the sisters
reach another logical conclusion. We will adopt Mrs.
Putnam-Jacobi's wording of it :

" It is, in fact, a matter of common observation, that
hysterical and anemic women in whom disordered men-
struation is most frequently observed, are conspicuously
destitute of habits implying either cerebral or spinal
activity, — that ' is, they neither think much, nor take
much physical exercise."

I had written thus far when opening at random a new
book brought by the morning's mail, my eye was caught
by these happily-coincident words :

" This improvement in the physique of the Americans
of the most favoured classes during the last quarter of a
century is a fact more and more compelling the inspection
both of the physcian and the sociologist. ... It could
not, in fact, be different, for we have better homes, more

. !■: i

FACE TO FACE WITH OUR GIRL. 14,5

vaucty ot healthful activity than even tlio best sitnflfpJ

tl aThaHt'^'^ rr'""'' Soinovitabrwartl f^otlt

<< TiT J ^f "'^^-^^lon liad been suspended.
ihe hrst signs of ascension, as of declension in nn

nknir.^'r ^" r"^^'^- A^ the fol age Tde^^^^^^^^
plants first shows the early warmth of S^rin- and f h«

thfn ih«t nf '"'"'^r ^PPr?«'^t«« ^nd exhibits far sooner
ordeca^"*^ ""'" *^' manifestation of natural progress

. A deliverance like this from a candid writer whose tnn«

Telstkf rr™n^^ ^?^-!!-^ abiSristc": eT
ers Tf »n ^^t.f'"^^ ""f ^ church-bell to fog-lost marin-
Ses If fnn' *^^^«^^^"g l^nd and in what direction it

luiate you that you are not your own *randmnf hp,? T.

our Tos^e, in thT^^. t™'"''™- "''?"="" "'V ^ave been
our losses in the past, you are on the winning aiiip TK«

knowledge of this, the possibility and ?he Eone of ,ht
futare laid solemnly by God and man within^ur young

I ll

# <f

American Nervousness," by Geo. M. Beard, M.D.,

p. 335.

f|fi

Hill

its

CHAPTER XL

HOW SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY?

" There should be imposed no restraint which han not for its objoct some

food ftreater than the temjiorary evil of the restraint itself. "—Dr. Thomas
luowN, " Lectures on Ethicg."

To make a free translation of our motto into French
slang, — The game ought to be worth more than the candle.

In " cradling" or " panning " the ore of the last chapter,
we may add a few valuable contributions to our store of
knowledge.

First. — The prevalence of the same class of physical
disorders in so many women of varying antecedents and
habits argues a common origin of these maladies, whether
structural or functional.

Second. — This would appear, upon the face of the sta-
tistics as a collected Wliole, to be gross neglect of the
important Third Part of her being which is to Woman
distinctive and not-to-be-ignored Sex.

Third. — The disorder of this function is, if not dii fctly
induced, measurably aggravated ly disobedience to ge-
neral hygienic laws, — notably those" which prescribe fresh
air, sleep, regular but not excessive employment ; good
food, well-cooked ; judicious physical exercise, congenial
occupation for the intellect and due cultivation of the
same, with stated seasons of rest for mind and body, and
such wholesome diversion of both as may prepare them
for repose.

Fourth. — Work is a blessing and beneficial to mind,
body and estate. Labour is a curse of which variation

HOW HHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ? I47

and m woman With th^ i„** *;/."''. "'^^"^ "^ ""m
will for tl o .nV« !;/ u ^^*'^'"' *^"^ includes wliat we

wom.„, a. the worid'a hoje of redLltir ' "* "■""=""
We— you and I, ray listening giil—wil trv to -;.>

P=.uu„-Ment«, and blatant radicals, and survey the

'"^ij

1' !■ .

'4h

flow SHALL OUR QlRL STUDY ?

:eS't,^^!jr„t"^r " "PP-- from a common.
We begin with a bit of very direct talk Th^r^ ,*=

f^^Snult't'' i ^""''" foirn.o™'egJgi usly
inconsistent than the admixture of vanity and aversion

C^aThn '""K"^'" ««^if bodies. She: whom
wfn JV I '" "S"' d'sdainfnlly scouting the prosDeet ot

stetst: r:^r.r T"'''>''=°°"»"-'''"^^^^^

hidden wIlT * J P^ymue upon the exterior. The
bv af rriS /■ '* "■"? "'"S ™<* «■■« worn into uselessness
SttSivtT'^^'^l'iy *■"> o™^-- "ho should ako

thouLd%S',rr\t.^^^^

leamfnftwt -r'T^f """r.^ "^^^ for a fortnight to
f^rT ? J- ° ^^ *^^6 fantastic scallops of her fnrp
top. or to dispose her back-hair in a Graceful coil or knot"

mg dt least ten minutes each morning in cleaning f,^

r^nTelSfe '' '^^P ^*" ^ ^^-^^eroritenl:
like nifk ?pi\ it '"^ consequence of this attention are
he e£ront\'V"'^.'^ rose-petals; who studies
IZ !J!i "P^l".,^®^ style and complexion of coiffure cut

«n« ?S^ t trigonometry, can not, with any show of rea-
son affect contempt of her corporeal substance.

She does love her body-the outside of it-with idola-
truus affection that absorbs and dwarfs many worthier

a common-

How SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ? J 49

emotions. Her npcrlpp+ r.f ^.^
cases is as pueriiruf It wo„ W W^"'''^'"^^^^'^^^^ ^^ «»-

wind up. '^^^'^^ -'^^ never takes the pains to

jeif i?stcaurorrn^ again upon this branch of our sub-
ciation of it value isThr'^-''^"'' *^"* imperfect appre-
validism of our sex Th! T"" f T °^ *^^ national in-
far as extreme of he Jt Id cot ^' '° ^° ^^'^ ^* ^^ ««
and spring mire hinder ouldoor^^^^^^^^^^^ T^"^''

and daughters believpd in +1?. exercise. But if mothers
with one-half the eamt?„*^,r^/^ P^^'^^^^ e"^<^ure
intellectual improve^. ,W v^^^^ ^ '"^ *^' ""^^^'^ °^
formidableness^InCs th;n n^ ^'^^'^!- ^*^"^^ ^^^^ ^^^i^
I hold firrnl.. f fu ^^^ generation.

degenerattS wo^^^^^^^^ '' ^^^f-- that the rapid
in our countrf is owinall. F'-? ^^*'' ^ '^°^<^ ^e^^^eice
adoption of Jertara^^dthn^'/vf ?* ^^^ogether. to their
modes of life. ' ^^ *^°'^ ^^^ lea^t desirable, of our

upfnl':S"^tri^^^^ ^-" formed

by a handful ofpeat and 1 K.Ti.*' °^'f '^ "^^'n' ^^^med

die, soons learns^wfth tSe nfodfi,^ %^"''^^"^ ^"«^-«-«-
ism, to fill the ranc^e ud to H?f ^ *^^''^^.^r^"^l^^^venu-
coal at five dollar>a ton ^^ ^^'^^ -^ '^ ^^°^ ^^^^ ^'^^
the kitchen ga burner and « ^^Ti^l« ^ d'-op-light upon
in a situation where sh; had f. "l"^?^ t ^ ^^°^'« ^^^
to draw water or to fetch 1 V' P?, ^'' ^^°* °"* o' doors
Thin boots take the place of tb. ^ .T'^ ^""^ '^' ^''"
she used totramnfon^lfl •, '*''"*^ ^^o^^°« in which
in all weather Her wilt? '^'^'' *" ^^^'^^^^ ^'^^ ^h"rch
in her best clothes to cWh ^' q"T '°°^°^^ ^^ a stroll
of an « acquainSnop " «ff ""^ ^''^^^' ^"'^ *° ^^^^ house
washes in a^steazSn^hott' ?'^ ^^ week- days. She
ing her wet si w£ f i^rmdry, and without exchang-
h,.r.^ ZaZl'^F ^°'' rubbers, or donnin? shawl or

ill

4 . ii

m
I.

r.'-

5 1:

]50

HOW SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

to tell on her after a year or two of this sort of work —
and what wonder ? If these violent variations upon her
former self and existence are insufficient to break her
down, there are not wanting accessories to the unholy-
deed in her bedroom where the windows are never opened
in winter unless by her disgusted employer ; in the moun-
tainous feather-bed and half-dozen blankets without which
she is quick to declare that she " could not get a wink o'
slape at night ; havin' been used to kapin' warm all her
life." Add that she devoui's meat three times a day with
the rapacity of long repressed carnivorousness and keeps
the tea pot on the stove from morning until night ; that
she " could live upon sweets " of the most unwhole-
some and most expensive varieties, and abhors early break-
fasts — andwe wax charitable toward our maligned climate.
Dr. Beard says of " American women, even of direct
German and English descent " : " Subject a part of the
year to the tyranny of heat, and a part to the tyranny of
cold, they gi-ow unused to leaving the house ; to live in-
doors is the rule ; it is a rarity to go out, as with those
of Continental Europe it is to go in."

Bridget and Gretchen are overgrown children, gross
and undisciplined. If one of them bruises her head or
cuts her finger, she will wail or howl like a yearling baby.
Without work they can not have savoury victuals or fine
clothes ; hence they must labour so many hours per diem.
Thought and planning seldom go further, especially if the
settled purpose of catching husbands whose wages will
relieve them from the necessity of " living out " be ac-
cepted as an extension of their clumsy scheming.

Still, Bridget is an imitative animal, and develops with
civilization into a sort of aptness in this respect. She
apes " the quality," while affecting to consider herself as
good as anybody else. Before she can be reformed, her
mistress must regulate her own habits and those of her
daughters m accordance with the dictates of reason and a
knowledge of established hygienic laws. Our domestics —

HOW SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ? 151

Celtic Gaelic, Teutonic, American of African descent

Thp.fr^^ 1 ^''^'''f ^^® intonations of her mistress
r ofJt^! ? i ¥ 'S;no^ance to knowledge. When Mrf
of /e,:?se tt 0?!^" T^" P"^^ ^^^ -^ ^bunlnce

the^k. , .a eab.net will follow suit, Twl/ b"t7S

»ilVf ''i-'"'"' ^. '"■"■ """ " 'he sons of the New World "
t^n !f ^k' •"PP°'°*'=i '" ">e effect upon the neJt SI
bCfn J'"'- '"g-'fl'^™* experhnent," should theifS

health/ ZvevTt the . ^^PT^f i™. "ore of the
we i nersl ,o ^r ■ "^"^ *? P°P"'" '"te"''"'. for f

rii iV?h??S :^ gr&x^

HT ^^»'"* child dreads the fire. That a chid

Sfctritt'-Sotri^r^^^
ef w S h '*"""?' ''^P'^<='»«°n- Yet the aveSe'lfst^^'

-he:L'\nd^as'to rt^v'-'" 'r. ""'■'■ ^'-- *»

}ip «afl r«- • *"" l^nch-pins of his wao-ffon before

hLtlf 5 '''' nJ'"™f^' ^^ *^« ««nse to be angiy w'th
himself, as well as ashamed, when a -orn «„A- i •

.^•ap gives way in going down-hill^rthrsvWveir ""h^e"
now remembers ha. been cracked this great wMle,"

lo2

HOW SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

snaps asunder behind a skittish horse. The dullest house-
hold drudge shakes out and removes the ashes and ad-
justs the dampers before she makes up her morninff
fires. ®

We have spoken together, and more than once, of the
propriety of creating a stomachic or dietetic conscience.
It is every whit as important to cultivate conscientious-
ness in all respect^! toward the oft-defrauded, incessantly
Ill-used body. In your schedule of study and recreation,
leave blanks to be filled out generously by the fulfilment
of the duties you owe to thi» co-labourer with soul and
mind. Do not be startled when I enjoin that, should the
mental duty dash with the physical, it is the former that
ought, with a young, growing girl, to yield to the asser-
tion of the latter. It is folly in a sick girl to study— an
error which she Should perceive instinctively, however
unversed she may be in the details of physiology. In
you, who know why the blood pumped through artery
and vein thickens, or chins, or falters ; why your head-
aches and dumb nausea throw the cold sweat to the con-
gesting surface — it is Sin.

You have no more right to eat or drink what you
know will disagree with your digestion than you have
to drop a furtive pinch of arsenic, just enough to sicken
her slightly, into your school-fellow's cup of tea. It is
as truly your duty to eat regularly and enough of whole-
some, strength-giving food, wisely adapted to your needs,
as to pray, " Give us this day our daily bread." Faith
without sensible works does not bring about miracles in
our age. There is the same sin in kind, if not in degree,
in omitting your " constitutional " walk to study a hard
lesson you would like to mak(> sure of for to-morrow,
that there is in picking your neighbour's pocket, or
cheating her in a bargain. Both are dishonest actions,
and in the long but certain run of justice, both are sure
to be punished. Put youraelf in thought outside of
your body ; make an inventory of its capabilities and

HOW SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ? I53

ftTi */r- -^1 i' ^''".' '^^"''^ "^^^r««t neighbour. See to
It that the soul loves it as itself. '

If your teachers are sagacious and just in aoDorHrn
A. t^i f >'' ''."'° y-™"- It « «■« ignoramus

, I have in my mind now a gifted womon who told mo

W shTr' ".'"'^. "P°^ *^^ conservation of forcT
how she had read and made aa elaborate digest of «

cTcttt'tfr "'"^^ ^^^^ -- ^-'^ 'b^-o^t : th

temnl.? A , ^"'"^^e the anguished throbbing of her
temples, and her eyes could bear no more lij?ht th«n fhl

LmI shoulder directly upon the page.

tot^? .''^'^''i^"°^"''^^«^ th« same sex, dete-^ined
to lose no time m her musical education, was propped un

fever C""^ her convalescence from a'speliy?^;ioi§
frZ; A .\^«^«^««-h?ok was set up before her on a

hZ'CLtnT'''''^ I'l '^'^'y '-^-'^^' then an
nour bnally two hours each day, in dumb show unon «

key-board penciled on a pillow. She has bel in Zr

t:nMZfun:7^rr ''■''{ ?^^ f-n^werr^^ntt
ten pridetully of the heroic batt e with lanc^uor and nnin T

fever left her a mere wreck. With strength and health
^tCrid."'"''^"^. '^^'^^ — P^-^ed m^uchTn thetS
, T^^.|;eroine of headache and scientific tastPs .till lives
and still fights with bodily ills as with a visibTe Apo Ivon
She can not walk across the loom without assittance,To

!■.:■: ti

ills

154

HOW SHALL OUR GIllL STUDY ?

abject is the ruin of the nervous system ; and in everv
day she di^ a hundred deaths with tic douloureux an^

srDr.^B:s wtr '-'-' -''' ^ ^^^^^-^ ^pp"

"So inevitable was this result, that had it been other-
hrCs^ltS! -«P-^ ''^' ^'^ ^- of cau«ation

It IS then absurd, and as cruel as foolish, to lash on
tT. riT ;P f "^'T' "" ^^^^^^"^ ^^^^i^or to wh^m you owe

k th. U^ *M,'^"^^ ^^ ^^^- ^°^ '^^^i^^ ^"d short^sightld
IS the self-will you vaunt :et an abler pen than mine tell

you. and in formula instead of illustration. Dr Anstie

m a treatise upon " Neuralgia "-which 1 commend to the

perusal of all who are afflicted with that malady-thus

. " In the abnormal strain that is being put on the brain
m many cases by a forcing plan of eluLtion^ we -shaU
perceive a source, not merely of exhaustive expenditure
of nervous power, but of secondary irritation of centres
like the medulla oblongata, that Le probably already
somewhat lowered in power of vital resistance^and pio^
portionatoly irritable." ^

hJi'f^f'li""^ oblongata is, as your physiological books
have taught you, a marrowy, oblong body connectino- the

S Isl tn, '^^^'^ ^' '''^^ '''^ dStnf rte!
centre is to deplete the nervous tissues more rapidly than

fh^^r.^' 't^^''^- ^" °^ore direct terms, i^ i V sap
the citadel of Ren son and of Life. To irritate the me-
dulla oblongata is to risk brain-fever. Excessive mental
application without recuperation of mind aTdbodT loss
of sleep, stress of excited thought, particularly upon one
agitating theme, are both strain and irritation ^

You have a fixed income of physical energy. Your
"pluck" IS mental force. The two together accomplish
the finest results of which human kin§ is cLable^The
bodily powers are the treasure-house in whi^h Nature
has deposited your wealth, the dowry settled upon you

and in every
uloureux and
iff^rent appli-

it been other-
of causation

>h, to lasii on
horn you owe
short-sighted
han mine tell
Dr. Anstie,
mmend to the
aalady — thus

on the brain
on, we "shall

expenditure
on of centres
ably already
nee and pro-
logical books
nnecting the
licate nerve-
rapidly than
i, it h to sap
tate the me-
isive mental
id body, loss
•ly upon one
a.
3rgy. Your

accomplish
pable. The
iioh Nature
id upon you

WOH SHALL OUB GIHL STUDY ? is-

±00

witCu?;';r;ftt\s^nrst"^^r^-^' 'y ^--^^ «lone,
childhood. ^TheiT iudipi n """^ ^°"^' ^'^^^'"cy ^nd

the original deposit un "^^"^'"'"^ ^^' augmented

session of a hTudir i/'\^"^ ^'?"^'^"^^ "«^ ^^ Pos-
that will yield fair and ?Pf'"'^' '''^^'^''^ ^^ stocks
the win-power or mori^fiS' 'u*"™'" ^^« ^iJ^ call
the inve?teTsumr i 1 ' '^' "^^"'^ ^^^^ draw upon
ing intore^'is^red up b "yfu? d^lL^ !f^"l-^^---
you are none the poorer 3 f h7 ^^^^^ expenses

you live is the richeffor wh j ^ ^^J^mumty in which

circulation. From tLlyt wCh tu^"*^^^f ^^^
upon the princinal ihf. iL T^ ^ '^ "^^^^^ *» ^Iraw

not be gradually i„,pove^lhed " ' '' ^™ ™'"''

prize or dipir/^rU^entl?*" t„\SLt""' *>'
vested capital of strenrrfh tL*^ i"Vm""^ "P°" your

i.ave enou^gh and mSlan e^oUtt'^' *''* ^"''
easy terms whnf wiii v>^ „ j i ^; ' ^ borrow upon

this semTserperhlns ail th«^'^ *' 'nP"* ^^^ ^^^'^"gh "
Commencemen^t^DaTthat w^^ '^^"^^^ ""*'l' ^^^

This frank admissiL Is L W ^^ ^f f"' T"^^^'
entitled "Chiefly Clinical'' " ^""^^^ '^^^P^^^'

tolave ;[ uCea'd-\o'';'^^^^^^^^^^ - afford

me the case of Miss F ^2i. « ^ ?^' ^^^ ^^'"•^y with
education when^Ztrai\;rtf;et:i*S'=^»-'

-at r„?thet;:u^^^ ''"^' eata.ti;?jrlt second

(The Italics are mine), *=

con,pHshed in ^any"*?' ^^11 ^S^X tt

1 ■:! ■. I ;
1:1 -I

156

HOW SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

^^H^^K

■ ■

H|I»

collapse, a wreck so pitiable that I have not the heart to
transcriiae it.

Dr. Clarke thus accounts for the tragical close of her
school-life :

" While a student she wrought continuously, — just as
much during the catamenial week as at other times. As
a consequence, in her mo^amoiiphosis of tissue, repair did
little more than make up waste."

Sequel of this improvidence and extravagance, — to
carry out our figure — Insolvency.

As a woman who was once a hard-worked school-girl ;
as a mother of daughters and the mistress of women-
servants, I should, without discarding our physician's
theory in toto or even in part, look backward and nar-
rowly along the lihe of Miss F.'s life, for the causes of
her misfortune. I should inquire, first of all, into her
home-training as a child ; then, as to her diet, — whether
she ate enough and regularly, or too much and irregularly ;
how many hours she slept and how her dormitory was
ventilated ; if she had a bedfellow, and if so, who she
was ; how much time was given to exercise in the open
air in daylight and sunshine ; what was the tenor of her
reading as child and girl and the tone of her associates ;
finally, whether her inheritance of nervous sensitiveness
did not make her an anxious, no less than a faithful
student.

The continual attrition of what are commonly styled
" secondary causes," upon the thi cad of human vitality,
prepare it for the break we ascribe to the last and
heaviest weight hung upon it.

To apply our principles personally ; — if you have suffi-
cient prudence and resolution to intermit lessons entirely,
until the actual pain of the headache passes, I am thank-
ful with, and proud of, you. But do you ever note, as a
matter f any consequence, that your feet and hands
grow cold and colder as you become earnest in study ?
that you have fallen into the habit of often pressing your

aoW SHALL OUn GIRL STUDY ?

157

the heart to

close of her

ly, — just as

times. Aa

, repair did

agance, — to

school-girl ;
of women-
physician's
•d and nar-
B causes of
11, into her
, — whether
rregularly ;
mitory was
10, who she
n the open
enor of her
associates ;
msitiveness
a faithful

3nly styled
m vitality,
s last and

have suffi-
is entirely,
am thank-
• note, as a
and hands
in study ?
jssing your

hands to your face to warm icy fingers and to cool glow-
ing cheeks that your throat aches and there is'an fwtU
goneness m the pit of the stomach, when the fate of a
problem trembles in the balance ? Your feet remain
"blocks of ice" far into the night, while your headToX
off slowly with the stealing mitts of Dream-Land You
he awake for hours after home or school-rules drive you
to your pillow, and use this as an argument (how often I
hear it !) against the tyrannical dictum—" early to bed "
It IS worse than nonsensical, you contend, to Vo to bed
when one cannot sleep ; that the uneasy tossinls of in-
somnia tire you more than it would to sit up and read
yourself into drowsiness. Notwithstanding the cogent
allegations of a young woman who "knows" logic
mother and teacher and doctor will sustain the proL.:
sition that It 18 better for you to lie awake, undressed in
an unlighted room, than to sit up awake in your dav-
attire m the glare of lamp or gas-burner. If you do not
secure Sleep's best boon,— nerve-rest,— the tension of
muscles, eyes, and skin is relaxed, and all young things
grow most healthfully in the darkness. Perhaps you fall
asleep soon after going to bed, but to re-enact in dreams
with the superadded distresses of unreined imagination'
the events of the day You foot up endless Ihies and
blocks of figures upon black-boards that stretch out into
space as you cipher, and the sums-total must be written
withm a stated and horribly short time. Or recitation
hour IS upon you, and you have neither lesson, nor book
Or you stand publicly disgraced on Examination-Day
for failmg to recite that which you agonize in nightmare
to articulate, °

These symptoms, familiar to triteness to every in-
dustrious pupil, are so many signals of danger sliaht
as IS the attention bestowed upon them in clinical
chapters and by practical educators and learners WUh-
out darkening our common-sense talk with technical"
ities,— repelhng virtuously the temptation to air our

' I

158

HOW SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

knowledge of the cerebro-spinal system, vaso-motor
centres, and the menace of vaso-motor paralysis, — we
may refer the discomforts W3 have enumerated — if we
except the hysterical choking and faintness, — to a single
specific cause ; to wit, an abnormal tendency of blood to
the head. Intellectual excitement pumps the blood to
the brain ; sleep draws it gently away. When it deserts
the extremities, it has sought other and unlawful quar-
ters. Restore healthful circulation by rubbing your feet
with dry flannel ; " toasting " them as hot as you can
bear at an open fire, if you have access to that cheery
and wholesome appliance to a living-room. Better than
either of these is a brisk run in the outer air when the
weather will permit. If you can not conveniently take
this, you can walk up and down a hall or chamber until
you are in a glow. Five minutes " wasted " in this way
will send you back to your books easier in body, clearer
of thought. When the blood-vessels of throat and head
are turgid, there ensues a sensation of fulness and pres-
sure about the top of the cranium, the temples and the
eyes ; ringing and roaring in the ears ; sometimes, a dull
ache at the base of the skull ; frequently a low nausea,
mistaken for dyspepsia, which is sympathy with the op-
pressed centre of nerve and thought. These indicate
incipient sufuaion of the brain, — one of the deadliest
foes of mortal life. Usually they are relieved by a
natural rally along the line of the abused physical forces.
Sometimes the aid of remedial arts is required to restore
equilibrium to the disturbed system. Now and then,
Nature and Art fail singly, and in combination; the
blood congests on the surface and in the substance of
the brain, and the patient is a corpse in a few minutes.
You can not prepare the way to this end more effectually
than by the habitual disregard of the premonitions of
cerebral discomfort.

.a.

Never, if you can avoid it, go to bed very hungry,
single cracker, or a dry crust of bread, will stimulate the

t;l

»0W SHALL OUR OIRL STUDY ? 160

coat of that organ, and give it something better to do
than provoking ugly drean.s. The persistent recurrence
of these 18 an indication that you are drawing tooheav"lv
upon your capital; exhausting the cellular tissues Ser
than nature can repair them.^ When the in nd wS no
te/: T '^t ^! "^ <^f ^i"'«he needs looking aC A
the d"vl'.k't°^ r^ '''/" right without resoHin^
»^ f k 7:- ^ ""L^ prolonged vacation. Do not stud?
up to bed-time. Preface the hour of retiring by a walk
on the piazza a merry carpet-dance, a bri|ht skeTchy

PanlT" ^ ^T""'" ^^^^"^' ^ «^-P<^er of"^ pLkwtk
Papers, -any pleasant diversion tliat wil' lift the ma-

nnr'"\°/^' work-groovo and set it in eaJy motTon
Xeelrest " ''''^' '' ''"^^^^ '^' ^'^''^^ and l^t the

it may^eem'' P?.h ^'.^"J' chapter-motto, discursive as

Th^rnrb f h^; J^a'''!'^ °^ ^^^'^^ ^' ^ temporary evil.

Ihe curb that hinders the onward bound of a mind i.mt

awakemng to a sense of its own powers is i^sTm^inl

distressing. Youth is so full of brCnt poss^SlSs • the

young are so sublime in self-confidence ; s^o zealousTn^n^

belief in failure to reach the goal, that we smile and love

while we repress. Ambition to excel in a Toble pursuit'

to improve to the utmost the season and opportunities

granted for academic education is praiseworthy It I

when laudable ambition overleaps the pa°f of' safetv

Tf hTair"\"^"'i' ''''''''' ^^^"'g^d -' fh^cei'X r&
of health; when the incessant application of one two or
three semesters IS to be succeeded by as many yeTi^' of
SeTpl;r^^^^'^^^^^^--^-'valueof^^^^^^^^^

"Without haste, without rest," is a jotr-trot maxim mn

.idered, antithetical terms. Labour ™3 lite \"a
done m ha.te la apt to be sloveply, althoughXs eZ^

■I

160

HOW SHALL OUR GIRL STUDY ?

quence is not a necessity. Haste is also indiscreet because
it begets an unhealthy activity of mental and physical
forces. Rest is an invariable human need— a snored per-
sonal and religious duty. Evasion of this upon specious
pretexts is more than an indiscretion. It is one of the
gravest, as it is one of the most commpn of popular eiTora.

D-^

':^^^^^^^^^

I k

CHi^ ^tb:r All.

THE RH'i Ti!>aC CM SICK.

'' If there any other instance in wj.oh Nature Mvaim th« mn.f J».«««f

In no other physical habit do individual I'diosyncraaiea
assert themselves more strongly and vary more widely
than in the matter of that periodical function of the Third
Tart of Woman s nature, which we shall denominate
henceforward the Rhythmic Check upon her ordinary avo-
cations of mmd and body. In no other is the law of Here-
dity accentuated more distinctly.

We have already dwelt, somewhat at length, upon the
culpable neglect of this vital function on th'e part of our
hale grandmothers. _ In the recollection of their blunders
and tolhes, their rigorous treatment of then- -Ives and
their growing daughters, we read the accompanyinrr ex-
tract with bitterness of meaning, conceived by personal
pain and bornof an ever-rankling consciousness of having
carried weight m life from our trial-heat

"The steps are few and direct from frequent loss of
blood, impoverished bluod and abnormal brain and nerve
metamorphosis to loss of mental force and nerve disease
Ignorance or carelessness leads to anemic blood, and that
.0 an anemic mmd As the. blood, so the brain ; as the
brain, so the mind. *

f "

Sex in Education," p. 96.

162

THE RHYTHMIC CHECK.

Our feminine progenitors never vexed their selfish or
thrifty souls with such calculations of possible culmina-
tion of evils implanted by themselves. Dr. Thomas in-
forms us that they had irregularities many, with internal
tumours and cancers, and the rest of the sickening list of
" incidental " disorders we are prone to believe are indige-
nous to our land and coincident with this era only.
There was good stuff in the matrons of the sixteenth and
seventeenth centuries ; indomitable fortitude and pa-
tience. They rebelled as stoutly against the inconve-
niences of their sex as do our Amazonian reformers, -but
silently, for the most part, because hopelessly. If they
submitted in seeming to their manifest humiliation, as
weaker vessels, we know from traditional mutterings
that have descended to us — here a sigh, and there a curse
on the day that saw their birth in the form of woman —
that the iron they could not withdraw rusted into their
souls. In order to be tolerably resigned to their lot, they
slurred over the whole matter with the fewest possible
thoughts and words. Womanhood was a legacy of shame
and woe from the Mother of all the living, reasoned the
philosophical and pious, for once in concert. Since it
could not be cast aside, they endured, some sullenly, more
in humble hope of another and a sexless existence.

We show ourselves by so much the wiser than our fore-
mothers as we cheerfully accept the fact of our temporary
weakness — not as a disgrace — the Lord who made us
women forbid ! but as a wise and gracious means to an
important and beneficent end. There is nothing more
mortifying in a woman's need of taking one day's rest in
thirty than in a Christian community's rest from ordinary
occupations for one day in every seven.

Dr. Clarke's mention of the " catamenial week" has
raised such an uproar of opposition from the sex most
in^'^rested, that we have allowed our attention to be
diverted by the clamour from his modification of the
sentence.

ere a curse

THE RHYTHMIC CHECK.

163

"Some individuals "—this is his statemen<>—« require
atthat time a complete intermission from mental and
physical effort, for a single day ; others, for two or three
days ; others require only a remission, and can do half-
work safe y for two or three days, and their usiul work
alter that.

I confess my inability to understand why the most
captious stickler for her right, as an independent femi-
nine entity, to work herself to death as fast as she likes
can take exception to this very mild prohibitory clause
A simpleton must see that it is preposterois to assign
any limit to the period of prudent inaction or remission
when the degrees of pain and inconvenience endured
during the recurrent indisposition are so different in dif-
ferent women.

Generally, it is safe to say that a healthy girl subject
to no hereditary peculiarities suffers little, unless in con-
sequence of recent imprudence, such as taking cold or
getting her feet wet. Others have a few hours of sharp
pain, only relieved by lying down, keeping the feet warm
and perhaps drinking a cup of hot herb or ginger-tea'
VViih the passing of the acute paroxysms ends all actual
suffering. Others, again, and this is by far the largest
class, recognise the approach of the season in slight head-
ache, fulness about the brain and a disposition to nausea
with weakness and a sense of weight in the lower part
of the back. These symptoms last for a day— sometimes
for two. The eyes are affected, more or less, and the
mind, for the first twenty-four hours, works neither as
freely nor as strongly as usual. OccasionaUy the period is
preceded by general lowness of spirits, and accompanied
by a sort of weak imtablity, The girl is easily wrought
up to tears and temper, and becomes capricious in
appetite.

' am p.n happy as to count among my acquaintances
one teacher of a girls' school, who enjoins upon her board-
ers and prescribes for da^ scholars at le^t one day's cesi-

i'i

*t '

If,

164

?1 ^1

liii

THE RHYTHMIC CHECK.

sation of physical and intellectual labour at the beginning
of the catamenial period. If the girl suiTers from pain
she is put to bed or laid upon the lounge for that day.
If her only infirmity is general uncomfortableness and
peevish debility, she is compelled to remain quietly in the
house for the same time, and left to amuse herself, should
her eyes allow the indulgence, with light reading or a
trifle of fancy-work. The cases are rare in which the
pupil is not ready to resume her lessons on the second
day. So palpable are the excellent effects of this plan,
that those under this lady's care, if slightly restive at
first, fall quietly into the habits enjoined after two or
three trials oir the experiment, and gratefully acknow-
ledge themselves the debtors of her whose punctilios they
were once disposed to deride.

Avoid violent exercise through the whole period.
Dancing, long walks, horseback rides, gymnastics, jump-
ing from stile or stair, should be as imperatively excluded
from the programme of the day as if you were confined
to your bed with illness. Displacement of the uterus, or
spinal weakness, so often succeeds indulgence in any of
these, that the wonder is how mothers can suffer their
daughters to tempt the risk, and that daughters dare take
it. It matters not how "comfortable" you feel. An
hour of dancing school, two hours in the ball-room, are
almost sure to increase the flow that had nearly ceased,
and to bring on a slow morbid aching in the small of
the back. These declare, in an unmistakable language,
that harm has been done. You " always come right again
in a few hours or days," you aver carelessly. But to
every "always" of physical condition and being there
comes an end. You bring that bitter by-and-by nearer
with each inaprudent act. There is an entry on the debit
page of Life's ledger. A mark is scored against you that
will tell in the balancing of the reckoning. Nature is an
exact accountant, who, in posting her books, sets down
nothing to profit and loss, She is a law-giver who cata-

THE RHYTHMIC CHE(^K.

165

beginning

from pain

that day,

eness and

etly in the

elf, should

-ding or a

which the

.he second

this plan,

restive at

er two or

' acknow-

tilios they

le period,
ics, jump-
'■ excluded
3 confined
uterus, or
in any of
iffer their
dare take
feel. An
•room, are
ly ceased,

small of
language,
ght again
. But to
;ing there
oy nearer
the debit

you that
bure is an
ets down
kvho cata-

logues imprudence and lapses from the letter.and spirit
ot the commandment alike as " Transgression "—a ina<r-
istrate whose sentence upon the guilty is as inflexible ^
that ol a New Jersey Judge. In her system of jurispru-
dence there is no Court of Appeals, and, this side of
Heaven, no pardoning power. Of physical wrong it may
truly be written that "Every transgression and disobedi-
ence receives a just recompense of reward."

While the rhythmic check holds you, try to maintain
tranquillity of mind and spirit, no less thsvi'of body. One
prime cause of the serious disorders of function and struc-
ture to which girl-students are liable is, beyond cavil
that they join to the natural wear-and-tear of brain mat-
ter excitement of the nervous system, an amount of men-
tal agitation unknown to the average boy. You consume
enough cellular tissue in the preparation and recitation
ot a single lesson to last your brother through half a term.
It IS like using a steam pile-driver to stick a pin into a
bow of ribbon. When the task is over you are " weary of
your life." Tho idle phrase has a flavour of terrible signi-
ficance, which you are far from divining. A life so new
as yours should never be a burden.
^ We have come, step by step, to a subject so momentous
in nature and consequences, and so vast in its scope, that
we may well hesitate to do more than skirt the edge of
the tract Most works upon so-called " Nervousness," and
the ramifications of diseases gathered for consideration
under that head„treat the topic exhaust: • ely in more than
one sense. The fascinated reader becomes to his intros-
pective vision, by the time the book is finished, an ani-
mate reticulated organism, sensuous, palpitating, tortured
out of the power to form a just diagnosis of his own
malady, or to judge if he has one. Of my free will, I
would never read what is commonly known ;is a " doctor s
book, that is, a thesis upon specific difiea.se;? and their
treatment While I do commend to every woman the
study of physiological works that describe the body in all

I !'

M t I

106

THE EHYTHMIC CHECK,

^ ,i

'ill"

its park in a normal state, the position and office of
every organ and the right management of these, I would
not allow any one except a medical student free access to
a physician's library. Certainly, never an imaginative
girl or an invalid of either sex.

There are volumes, however, which have been carefully
prepared by medical men for popular reading, and which
that portion of the public that is set in families, can not,
ought not to dispense with. Dr. Beard's work, already
alluded to, is curious aad interesting reading, rich in sug-
gestions of the Future of our nation. A neat little volume
on my desk opens of itseli - passage against which I
pencilled emphatic approval, n:ionths ago. I can not help
copying it here entire, supplying italics, also, because I
can not help it. i

" Looking broadly at the question of the influence of
excessive and prolonged use of the brain upon the health
of the nervour system, we learn, first, that cases of cere-
bral exhaustion in peopie who live wisely are rare. Eat
regularly and exercise freely, and there is scarcely a limit
to the work you may get out of the thinking organs.

"But if. unto the life of a man, whose powers are fully
taxed, we hrinq the elements of great anxiety or worry, the
whole machinery begins at once to work, as it were, with a
dangerous arfwunt of friction. Add to this constant
fatigue of body, such as some forms of business bring
about, and you have all the means needed to ruin the
man's power of useful labour."*

"Boys! "says the novice in prayer-meeting exhortation
m "Cape Cod Folks." "And girls, too," he added, more
gently. " And girls, too. Certainly, / think so," he con-
tinued, "/think so!"

Change the sex of the " Wear and Tear" extract, and
we begin to see light through the great darkness that may
be felt. You— our girl— work at a disadvantage, because
you study in such deadly, such superfluous earnest. It is

» " Wew fvud Tear." p. X8,

' t

THE BHYTHMIC CHECK,

167

a weU-estabhshed physiological law that any active emo-
tion as of anger, anxiety, grief, or extreme joy, experi-
enced during the period of the catamenial flow, acts
swiltly ^nd powerfully upon the organs from which it
proceeds. Instances are very numerous where it is in-
duced prematurely by excessive agitation, and quite as
trequent where the discharge is suddenly arrested by like
causes. If you could train yourself to do "half-work " in
a rational manner, it would probably not injure you to
study on the crucial day of the rhythmic trial. If it were
in you to « take things coolly," as a rule ; to prepare your
tasks for the intervening three weeks with calm assiduity
ot attention ; to finish one thing before darting at ano-
ther ; to keep your work well in hand, with vour own
inclinations and impulses-in brief, to become acknow-
ledged mistress of yourself— you would accomplish more
than all the doctors in the land could effect in the estab-
lishment of pamless regularity in the recurrence of the
seasons The unsettled hurry, the looking away and
forward from the business in hand, the untimely specu-
lations as to to-morrow's probabilities, which are conspi-
cuous phases of American Worry, grow into a physical, as
well as a mental habit. A man borrows trouble upon lon^
credit J a woman gives bills payable at sight and lives in
daily dread of their presentation. Now while, all your
powers are in the formative state, set about learning how
to work methodically and temperately, and a more severe
task— by the day. instead of the job. When you find
your hand trembling and breath coming irregularly • when
your heart throbs audibly and something that beats like'
a clock in your temples answers, stroke for stroke— stop f
Let go thought and book entirely while you raise a window
and look into the street, or walk around the house once
or, if you must sit still, shut your eves and proj •< ; vour
fancy— we will say, into a stubble-fid d. Think ot some-
thing amusing— or insufferably stupid. Good Mr. Meat-
less counsel to ill-regulated Tattycoram. " Count fivt

' it

: '■ 1

i«,agiaf,'-

h« '

168

THE RHYTHMIC CHECK.

and-tweuty before you speak," is worth re!)Wiiab(vin'T.ind
adopting in the circumstances. If ^ou woui*.! count'' four
times five-and-twenty before thinking again, ;lie thought
would be better worth havin ; than the ibrced product of
a inmd at fever iitit. Y( ■;. may make rebe^ of your
bodily functions; you cannot enslave thira. Mana^e-l
intelligently and kindly, they tw"!! strve fou well all vour
days, and your days be longer in ihi land than v/ei-e
tho%e of your grandmothers.

^ " Whoso will observe [the wondei-ful providences of
i-'>>) shall havtr. wonderful providences to observe," re-
marks a pH hy old author. The same may be said of the
woDdcxi'ui niachinery inclosed in your uiortal frame. The
rhyttiniical response of nerve to fibre, and of tissue to
luaction, is harmonious in the normal perfection of God's
makmg. As you regulate each jarred section in conso-
nance with the design of the Creator, you will grow
into delighted appreciation of the fitness and beauty of
the structure it is the fashion to decry as a clog upon the
immortal soul.

The prophylactic, or health-preserving art, is a more
useful, as it is a more graceful study than that of the-
rapeutics—the Sisyphus-labour of health-restoration.

" Women make work so hard !" is a masculine form of
reproach, and better-founded than are most slurs upon
our works and ways fj-om that source.

We do work harder, faster, less patiently than men.
We marshal the afiections into the area of the intellect-
idealizing the real, and embodying the ideal into objects
to be appropriated and loved.

A boy likes his Latin. A girl "just loves it ! " He
works out a problem thoughtfully and deliberately, stay-
ing his hand to whistle a tune under his breath and still
meditatively, over an obdurate sticking point.

N-^- — There is a sticking-point in ev^r^.' worthy en-
terprise. When you do not happen upon c ' ook sharply

:*:i^

The llHYTttMlC CHECK.

count four

he thought

product of

;N of your

Managed
ell all your
tiian v^-^re

idences of
)serve," re-
said of the
rame. The
f tissue to
n of God's
L in conso-
will grow
beauty of
J upon the

is a more
it of the-
•ation.
le form of
slurs upon

ihan men.
ntellect —
bo objects

it!" He

'Oly, stay-
i and still

orthy en-
k sharply

169

down"hiii!'^'^^'' ^* ^ '''^'' '^'^ ^^^ ^^'^ ^^y ^^^«pt

. .1 J^^*^°^\P''^^^ '^ "°* accelerated one-half beat by the
difficulties he encounters. He is philosophical over a
failure that would " drive you fairly wild." In five

ot the^asco, or been applauded for writing out the solu-
tion, he has forgotten lesson-book and precentor on the
play-ground, The equilibrium of gra/ tToWht-flakes
and reg^arity of blood-tides are perf^ct^y lestofed He
IS as good as new-^and better.

If you can not emulate his equanimity, yet have the
feirness and candour to acknowledge tW gentle and
wholesome ministry of the Khythmic Check upon your
impetuosity; the Sabbatical calming of hot and Tgh^^fe-

ZTTh' ^^^breathing-space in th! shaded valle/before
agam attempting the heights.

i !l

III

CHAPTER Xni.

AMERICAN WORRY.
^■nA ^°Z'- ''®^°'^ ^® ^^^ ?°",® ^*''' ^e entered intaa very narrow pasaaiye
grm}^^ """^ ^^'^ chained, but he saw not the chains. )"-P»7yn»i'« Pro.

It is a popular fallacy, flattering to the objects of it.
tliat women are more patient than men.

Morally they are so much braver, and in the endurance of
pain exhibit so much more fortitude, it is not strange that
they should be accredited with the virtue which Wendell
Jr-hilJips calls " that passion of noble souls." It is as natural
m the beginning for a boy to untie a knot, as for you who
are a girl to tug at it, stamp your foot, and cry out for
apair of scissors. The bovine pertinacity with which your
brother digs away at the incomplete task you r-astered in
one-third of the time he has already spent upon it, irritates
you beyond control. You fillip bits of caustic irony at
him; allude to him as "His Snailship" and "Blunder-
bore, ' and thank Heaven audibly in his hearing that you
are made of different material from this hulking lad. You
criticise your father in terms more respectful, but in the
same spmt; wonder Mamma does not stir him up to do
this and that thing for which she and the daughters peti-
tion repeatedly, instead of promising "to see about it."
You know that such supineness and sluggishness would
kill you outright, and bite back by strenuous effort the
saucy comment upon the prosy ratiocination by which he
gams the conclusion you perceived with half an eye.

AMERICAN WORRY.

171

I read once an ingenious paper upon the " Nahirjil

M? alThr 1 '';• tf ^'" that^onta^ed some Xua
hits at the mutual intolerance of men and women bovs
and girls. In my judgment, quarrels betweenT£s
and sisters, lovers, husbands and wives, have for their
sharpest provocative the lack of charity arising from an
mabihty on the side of the man to comprehend^whT the
woman should be so quick, and on that of the woman how
even a man can be so slow. woman now

You can not " sit on a cushion and sew up a seam"
^i<^5^"*. «««'g^^ng to yourself a task-a "stent'' ZThe

time. There is no especial propriety in this allotment
VourtHo'LT^ comforUy without sett^Tg what
Tf h!r! ' ^ ^""^ ^°?^ y^" ^^« to be about it Nor

lesion L^^ T/ '^"TV^ y°"^ determination that the
lesson begun at four shall be finished at five, beyond vour

'3 orfb'' ^'''^'Ty-^VrohMj call it " tCld thing "

Tdrawin^ fb7^--n ^^ ^^"^ ^f^'^ ^^^'^ ^^« ^^^^and tired^of
a drawmg that will occupy all the time you can give to
your pencil for ten days, if you would do it iusticf You
njure the transparency of your colours by-'Sg in a
sh^de which should not be applied until the firTc^oat is

While you "love " your studies, you act nevertheless

red I'rSotr' rr^""^'^'^^^^^^^^

rea and personal, while you are engaged in it You

iW bnlX°"J ™ n^^*^>*^ ^^''^'' i^^tef d of quietly lav^
mg hold of It. Opposition to obstacles, the res2e to
master a given point call out, not a calm kUy of willand
massing of suitable forces, but a bustling prUs oT eve?v

" Tt n W^f '• '*, ^'""^^"^ ^^«--^« *^ ^oM the cam^
The physiological pnnciple of doing only onethin^

^owth"o/2r """^^^^ '' ^^"' ^°ld«-« truly of S?
gowth of the organization as- it does of the perform«no.
vi an^ VI its special functions/'

r V

.11

r'v

tk.

172

AMiiRlCAN WORRY.

li.i'i:

Dr. Clarke's truism has many facets, all reflecting light.
That restless brain of yours must bo steadied upon the
coiitomplation of " one thing " before you can do it well.
To your apprehension t))'^ i— practicable of Scripture
injunctions is, " Be u /loheretore anxiuus for to-morrow,"
or that other, " Be not anxious for your life."

It is so iimch to you — this precious, untried life of
j'ours — " all the life you can ever have in this world ! " —
you say, piteously. You touch and handle the unproved
armour with delight so intense as to trench upon pain.
We who have worn ours so long that spiritual muscles
and joints are inured to pressure and abrasion, preach
vainly of the wisdom of living but one day in twenty-
four hours. We tell you, — tenderly, for our hearts are
oiie long moved memory of our own Spring-time, — that
while the Father gives i.s some blessings as He bestows
the fruitage of th> vine in clusters. He pour out the
elixir of life drop by drop, minute by minute, taking
away each before the next is granted. It sounds to you
like the penurious prating of little souls — so full is your
cup, so radiant the glitter from untasted depths. The
myth of Cleopatra's dissolved pearl is apposite to your de-
sires, and, so far a^ you can fulfil them, to your pra' tice.

It is natural uo reach and commendable to upraise a
lofty Ideal. " He who imeth at the stars shall hit a
nobler ^ark than if l aimed no higher than a tree."
Your aiiu- wiU be the truer, your chance of success fairer
if your pulses are strong and even, your eyes steady.
Drill thon- ^*3 and nerves into pationt attention to the
work of one hour, resolutely waiviag off the encroach-
ing shadow of the next. Fill your heart ".v.d haads full
of To-day. To-morrow b V.,iigs to God. You iiave not
his permission to ov( "-draw your allowance of daily grace.
There is a lulling ^ 'ty 1i ke the ripple of a brook under
the moonlight, or t( h of a cool hand upon the

fevered eye-balls, r

- "-»!?-*- -rV TT O .

" To-morrow ! the mysterious, unknown gu.at,
Who cries to me ; ' Remember Barmecide,
And tremble to be happy with the rest.'

ing light,
upon the
o it well.
Scripture
morrow,"

d life of
orld ! "--
inproved
pon pain.

muscles
n, preach
. twenty-
earts are
ae, — that
! bestows

out the
3, taking
is to you
11 is your
IS. The
your de-
)ra'.tice.
ipraise a
all hit a

a tree."
ess fairer
3 steady.
>n to the
sncroach-
aads full
liave not
ily grace.
3k under
ipon the

AMEIUCAN WORRY.

And I make answer, ' I am satiHfied ;
I dare not asic ; I know not what is beat ;
Goi) hath already aaid what Hhall betide.' "

173

It is not Work, but impatient solicitude, the frettino-,
teasing thought and care for tlie next minute, the next
hour, the next day, to which we apply the homely tern<,
" Worry," — that breaks down our school-girl ; that, grow-
ing with her growth, and strengthening with her strength,
becomes the leading characteristic of the woman. °So
linked are our associations this (pality with our ac-
quaintanceship with earnest workers,— women of prac-
tical philanthropy; women of practical housewifery;
women of practical piety ; witii mothers whose children
shall rise up and call them blessed ; with Deborahs in
the Israel of literaiure to whom tiie people come up for
judgment, — tliat we have come to infer indolence and in-
capacity of her who is "easy-going" in philosophy aiid
action. Yet we all know exceptional women whose
luiet, well-directed energies achieve marvels in their
p "uliar line of work. They run not iis one who beateth
^^ air, but run with patience.

-Next ♦^o th« faculty of con( .'ntrating and guidinn-
though rank in value among -soul-powers the ability
to control he nerves, to equalizand rightly to distribute
the crude forces whose zeal is not according to know-
ledge, ind instruct them by rigid' discipline to obey Will
rather than Feeling. In more direct language, keep
Feeling out of work us much as possible. Make resolution
and industry to depend upon conscience. The abiL> , to
do this argues excellent mental training, and is not,
incompatible with a heart}- enjoyment of work for its
own sake. On the o lier hand, feeling, heart, —all that is

loosely generalized under the head of the emotions, is

too apt, if pressed into a service for which it is not fitted,
to lose munile, like other injudiciously-applied agen ies!
and to degenerate into morbid sentimentality. If you
would te^t tlie truth of this assertion, ask yourself how

174

AMERICAN WORRY.

1(11

many of your mates are doprcsserl into misery l)y the
anticipfited loss of a place in class, and ciy f)ver' discour-
agiiij,' lessons ; how many older women break down over
a vexatious piece of work, or the disarrangement caused
by an accident, and weep as for tlie loss of father or
brother. It sounds well to say that "she throws her
•whole heart into wliatever she undertakes, be it a great
or small matter." In etiect, it is senseless triHing with a
delicate and precious thing. Except when Royalty goes
through the pretty farce of laying the corner-stone of
public buildings, silver trowels are not used for spreading
mortar. It is as proper to take up ashes with a gold
spoon as to excite feeling to hysterical vehemence in
conning a lesson in trigonometry. If you would prove
your brain to be sexless, divorce it from the heart. In
this respect, at any rate, require it to do a man's work in
a man's way. And do not fear that the process will
make of your womanly self an " intellectual abstraction."
The body is the handmaid of the mind. Never forget
that ; nor that the mistress toils at a fearful disadvantage
who is constantly obliged to make allowances for the
weakness, or to supplement the incompetency of her
servant. Also, that in a well-balanced household, mis-
tress and maid have, each, her separate task, and that the
most obliging subordinate will weary and turn surly if
called off too often from her appointed business to "lend
a hand " to what her employer has undertaken to per-
form. She " didn't hire for that kind of work," she in-
forms you. Your nervous system tells you the same
thing, and as positively, many times a day, but since the
protest is not coupled with a month's or week's notice to
quit, you pay no heed to the warning voice.

I have just been re-reading Mrs. Putnam Jacobi's
erudite essay upon " Mental Action and Physical Health,"
and proudly sul)join her evidence to the tiuthfulness of
what I have here written of my owh views on this
subject : —

I m

AMERICAN vvonnr.

175

nJirii" •?^ip^''''''i'''*'"''«'^ '^fter excessive emotion es-
Cd^ V t ' ^^^f, ^•^«P••«««i''g character, and accom
the Wl.y 1 ', ^""iK^'''. ""f''>^ vaso-motor paralysis ,n
thelHchryn,al glands). ,s generalized all ovlrthr/odv

ZVl' 1 '"^T'^"'' ''*'•'>' '""«h more often followe bv
headache, or by symptoms of cerebral congestion or anS^

Stei;otd;^^ '' '''-^'-' except?nper.onsrr-
cunt amhitiom, or harassing anxieties "

the highest of all .StZC:.tX7nr^- ^'■'""■™^'' "
And ou the preceding page we have :

go..M growth, exlLpt if bt 1^, i, rw^falth!

tion^ IS normal physiological, and healthful " * ^

Without making this chapter " chieflv cHnip«l " i.*

cite a story or twJtak.nfrom life ^ '^^' ^^^ "'^
I know a pretty li^tle woman who h- noithp" ^1,^1

f!^J!!!j^!!!!!^^ tm

•* American Nervousness," pp. 201, 202,

111

' 4i

iiii

176

AMERICAN WORllY.

the care of her health. She is bright, popular, fashiona-
ble and without having been graduated at any Woman's
College, or Annex, is physically wrecked. She has no
organic disease, say her physicians; also, that her sick
headaches are constitutional and hereditary. She is rich
and has no money -anxieties. Her husband adores her'
and she is free from jealousies and the pangs of unre-
ctuited affection. She is kind-hearted and charitable in
judgment, as m act ; wishes well to everybody, and is
theretore, not poisoned by spleen or envy. But her ner-
vous system is in armed revolt; has overrun her, body
and soul. Nobody is ^^urprised. Everybody prophesied
years ago, that her nerves would master her strength if
not her reason. As a child, she lost appetite, and went
into tearful ecstasies at the gift of a new doll As a
shna school-girl, she refused food, and could not sleep at
night, it the morrow thi-eatened a difficult recitation
As a young woman in fashionable society, she became as
much excited over the choice of a new bonnet, the manu-
tacture ot a pin-cushion, or the pronii.se of an evening*
party as at the nearing prospect of her marriage to the
man she loved.

It was a curious, and then a diverting spectacle to
watch the tossing, gurgling waves of her everyday exist-
ence. Iler best friends lauglied, and loved her the better
for her impulsive, whole-souled ways. Strangers stared
and new acqamtances criticised her " want of repose of
manner.' Her friends love her dearly still, but admit,
reluctantly that she tries tlieir nerves by her restlessness
and that she is never altogether rt her ease in any cir-
cumstances. Impartial critics pronounce her " eccentric "
When she sews, the silk whips hissingly through the
stuff, the needle heats in her fingers. Her air in the
street and in the large assemblies is that of a startled
bird making ready for flight. The pose of her head is
alert, her eyes are eager, her hands never still. Intensely
a.ivo to external impressions, fiutteriug at every word,

AMEEICAN WORRY.

177

she conveys to the beholder the idea that Jier brain- sur-

Plal" Lrt^T^r^'^^'^'y- «--^-« Photogr^^hc
plate. She is, all the while, taking " ne^ratiVes "Instead
of receiving, as do others, momentllrv imp eSons-ldfs^

anZt!:;rh^i:Str'°^'°^'^^=''^^«^--^«^

As a girl, her>wift darting from one subject to an-
other, her wa3^ of flashing abruptly into a quiet, hum-
drum conversation, with some naively-earnest qu^ry or
comment, were p.quantes, and likened by her admLrs
to the motions of a hutnming-bird. She^ plunges in-
stead of flitting. now~and hard-bruising herself often
and sometimes, and most unintentionally^ other people'
She has lost tone." Such is her half-mirthfuf ha ?:
sad report of the verdict of five eminent physiciank To
restore tone, she has travelled by land and sea; been
screwed up by quas.sia, gentian.^iuinine, an.l ported
She drinks milk and beef-tea. and has relinquished tea
and coffee as " rank poison." Five other doctor of eqS
eminence recommend sedative measures, because \er
nerves are too ensely strained. To lower them to con-
cert-p.tch, she has swallowed "quarts," she assures you
of valerian and hyoscyamos; walked herself into ex-
haustion; gone to bed early every night and regularly
laid awake until daybreak. When, by srme happ'y S
dent she sleeps four hours a night, she is so eEd ac-
cording her showing, that she" is tempted to send the
news to the Associated Press as « An Item of Singular
and Interesting Information." She is not cross • she is
00 sweet and sound at heart for that, but she i " wo !

ried to an extent that no language or ficrure of sneo -h
can desfir hft. " Sho n.r, /i.. ^.^xP- , ^ , "t,uit; oi speo^n

can describe. "She can do nothing by halve,
aflectionate apologists. '

It is sadly true. Not even suicide.

say her

178

AMERICAN WORRY.

in^F ^ri^'"''"^.-^'" '^ ^'^''^ ^'^^ ^^y over this passage
m Elise Venner/-a passacre we marvel at as we read
and recollect that it was written by a man •

bhe has so many varieties of headaches.-sometimes
asif Jael were driving the nail that killed Sisera i^to
her teinples.-sometimes letting her work with S her
brain, whiie the other half throbs as if it C d L to
pieces,-sometimes tightening around the brows as if her
cap-band were a ring of iron,-and then her neurahrhs
and her back-aches, and her fits of depression" nXh
she thinks she is nothing and less thin noth n.-and
those paroxysms of which men speak slightingly as hvs-
terical.-convulsions, that is all, only not^commo^nlTfalal
ones,-so many trials which belong to her fine and
mobile structure,-that she is always entitled to pTtv

"Tf T^^""^ ;^ "^^-7?",;" «obb'ed the poor rich woman

life Ish.ir' /''':f""^-''^T^^ ^°°^ «f <^J»« ^retclS
lite 1 shall end my days in a lunatic asylum "

It is not headache that makes her nervous but nerv-

but Wir'^^'/w".^^^ ^'"^''''''- This is'notwJa;
but Waste, and Waste at its wicked worst For siie
has nothing to show for the ruinous expenditure of vitS
force, excepting the burnt-out ashes of a life t^at ml ,ht
have been rarely blessed. An amount of eneiytt
might have wrought the redemption of a PaXfconti-
nent has been squandered on the commonest triviamies
of a commonplace career. She is impoverished and no
one else the. richer. With a heart a4ing with Win.

mis^able " '^™ ' '^^ ^'^"'^^^ those^ dearest to^he?
As a pendant to this portrait, let me give a sketch of
of one who was the valued associate of m°v early Hfe a
woman of strong will, shrewd intelligence, and remal-k
!?J,!^l^!f ? ability. , Her husband was a succSuI
C-j ^..,^h^ni, an amiable gentleman and a fair financier,

AMERICAN WORRY.

179

but one whose talents were particularly adapted to the
straight, beaten track of business transactio'ns. With-
out bung dull-witted, he was not ready of expedient :
needed timely notice when a change of course was neces-
sary. 1 may add, to his credit, that he was never slow
m awarding to his wife due praise for the assistance she
had given hiin from their marriage-day in the conduct of
ms attairs. It was a habit of long standing with him to
bring home to her eveiy evening a full report of the
days operations, to consult her before embarkincr in a
new enterprise, and trust to her advice when his" own
judgment was at fanlt.

^J^%y,}'f:'^^^''^^^^^r''('^^'^erityyetivs when the panic of

if tell ike a black frost upon the country. Up to this

date the difference in temperament and method of work

between husband and wife had not told obviously upon

either. He was easy-tempered, hopeful, quick to rebound

trom pressure, with a frank laugh and merry word when

the day was at the darkest. The wife's was probably the

stronger nature of the two, since in all these years the

double burden of his mercantile cares and her own duties

as housekeeper and mother had not sufficed to wear her

out. Her hair had grown quite gray; thfre were pain

lines between her brows ; her lips were thinner and smiled

less readily than of old; but her alert carriage and sen-

tentious, incisive speech were utterly oppose.! to the

generally received ideal of a broken-down woman. She

rallied vyith prompt energy to meet the exigencies of the

hard times. In her home her economies were in^reni-

ously contrived not to lessen family comfort, yet bore

severely upon herself She cut and made her own and

her children s dresses, besides doing all thoir plain sewing •

dismissed the laundress and undertook the fine ironin.^

herselt. And while she wrought with her hands he?

mmd was incessantly intent upon the growing complica-

\^' '' •••'"'ti.-i-.i.::, anitiis; iUT Hivonuon racked to

devise ways and means of averting threatened ruin.

■'

180

AMERICAN WORRY.

w«4 of tL\^::Li^^ re7a?r<r-the?^T<^''»

of the morrow was fimMiPri +v,^ i f"^ , ^"^ liabilities
»lept like an i ™pSk htUr„XTr 'r?'' "/

hand n'ever trembt? a^L h! ^ T ^^^ '"!'• '^"''- ^^"^

disaster, and he bronabf n\,f l^ ^"^ , '*" ^™ escaped
health of body and sten'tt of ^-^f ' *^" ^^^^'^ ^^^^^^^
worsted by thj trial. ?fn.^-..i."'"'^' ^""^ «« «^ightly
of his friends His l ?. .1 ^^^dering admirttion

colour thet obS^ed-w^^ ""^i"^' ^f ^-^
sharp of eye too and of speech Peonl. h ?^', ''^^'*

her caustic criticisms and ^eTartee and to o«!f h '" ^''^^
comfortable woman to deal wit b V ^ ^'''' ^° "»'

her a "drivino- mistrp^T- " T \^f '^'■''^''*' ^^"^^^'^'•e^
were "as synrpaSLT^s p'na ''« 'H^^f^f '^^* «^^
not make ich^a seriouf b'sinr of mt ''''' '''' " ™^^

as a higLnSe7^3te'rii:i7;f '' '!^.^ T^'^^^'y ^^ ^-^
shock To all when he drf nldH "' ^^^^ '^ ^'"^ ^ ^^'^^^^^^

her husband took the 'ZdtdiHd 7 "T"? ^"^^ ^«
the accustomed after-br&:frotf ''"" '"^ ^"^^ ^«^'

Non^^ToToht^ftlen^tjhe^lo ^'^ ^^^^^-^-f burial.
For all tha^ she wZ sSicSe "" ^" ''"^'"^'^^ ^^°"«d-

1 i!»

AMERICAN WORRY. ^Sl

kind ? ° itJivvam ot impatient woman-

voltr'Ti,^''^' «<^J^-««'^troI-Iearned most easilv in

- theapJointed'tX^ft^lTc^fttty'^Tr "• 'r.''
s.ngleness of mind, the pleasures beSin. to e{;h\^'^'
and season (h^hiva^■c. a^ e "%'y"oi"g to each hour

shadows Do no de.t- . £ , 'f*' '■'^*''^ *an for
in longing for t^^'tnt:^-^^'"' of spring-time
al.ve and modeiatolv comfmtS 11" J • "* ^"^ ■"•"
of sufficient grace foi^ thltx tr hS isYh:X"JTr'
morrow of yesterday. Make th,. /.Lf "j';^ ¥'"'' *"■
The poet hids you « Enjoy if I is tWn» ■- *t! ^J?'"'-
Jill never retin to b^^rjghte^ 'o^' "be de Xd t'

trellLtral:" ■*™''' ''^ '=°">'^'^»' "^ --' "P the

Nobody doubts who got the fruit
borne men do borrow trouble habituallv >f^
IS discontinued with ffrpaf^t w-ffi u ^t! . Practice
been formed. But k ft • •?^^*^,'^^?^ '^ ^«« <^nce
plods the mtry ^.^ll^^^^^^^^ ^'?

and is too muV-h in fPRvn^iLv ^^V °"^'' ^^ Despond,
perceive thTir chls Women 7^1 '' "^^^^^^^^^ ^o

ments negotiate for tro«S eomptnf LtL^^^^^^
maioritv nav bnfh the bonr' ^^™Pound interest, and a
Hesh. ' ' ' ^ond-munuy ana Uxe pound of

(--3

182

AMERICAN WORRY,

The cathohcon of mortal ills, the specific beyond all
other offered remedies for mental excitation, for the
chafang and worrying and fearincr that are a deadlier
clram upon the nerve-centres than any deg.'ee of ititellec-
tual application, is a calm trust in the wisdom and ten-
derness of our Heavenly Father,

^ One last extract from Dr. Beard. He supports by sta-
tistical evidence these propositions :

"Ist. That the brain-working classes— clergymen
awyers, physicians, merchants, scientists, and men of
ietters—iive much longer than muscle-working classes.

-nd. Ihat those who followed occupations that called
both muscle and brain into exercise were loncrer-lived
m^nu 1 °^^ who lived in occupations that were purely

"3rd That the greatest and hardest brain-workers of
history have lived longer, on the average, than brain-
workers of ordinary ability and industry

"4th. That clergymen are longer-lived than any
other great class of brain-workers."
_ This last remarkable fact he explains after this fash-

'1. Their calling admits of a wide variety of toil,
.. i- ^^fmparative freedom from financial anxietv.
^.3. 1 heir superior mental endowments.
'nt' '^^^^^' ^"P^^^o^ temperance and morality "
Ihese reasons for the longevity of a class of the busi-
est men in our country he supports with more or less
pertinence Without staying to question any or all of
these hypotheses, I would suggest an explanation of the
tact, drawn from a somewhat extensive and verv inti-
mate acquaintanceship with the profession, at least in
what IS styled "the groat Presbyterian family," embnic^
ing the Presbyterian, Reformed Dutch, and Congrega-
tional denominations. ^ *

Asa rule (the exceptions of which I do not deny)
these men trust themselves and the interest, dearest to

AMERICAN WORRY.

183

p u„ui?t ix.it 'its l7v^ -■='"«
•■St- ^-ci S «^^^^^^

am with thee," brinr^s strength o„, ^' -^earnot! I
with bahn for present iils° ^^ '""'^^^ ^^ ^^^^^^

<^^to1l£:'''^^^^'^ ^^/>^>? definite and
hold for you b^ asrurod Zf . "Z"^- ^^'^'^«'* '^ ^^Y
His purposes' W d y' u tu t'fr?'^;? ''^"'"« ' ^^^^
His iwn nature be all W «n i' ^ ^^^ ^necessities of

yet h^ef.1. u..^^::^!;^:;, h^ ^?r^'

knott'To trdX'^'Thr^^'^Y ^-^ ^hlj'lhou
have become dearer 'M; » •'°'''^ ^"^>^ ^"^ ^h'eady

^ If " The'^itoTJheYor^d^rXnT-'^: iS^^T ^°^--
for young hearts to frame and Sh J L'to u'.t''^^"^
yet easier for you than for your e ders ?n Lf ' '' '!
say : " On Thee do I wait all the d« v t ' v '^""^ ^""^
to the care and maidance of .nn. ^^ .7°" ^'^ '^ ""^^^
is the natural a^^ud^V y^T Wt ' Yo^'^''^^"
with your whole weight upon the Alm^.l^f a '^^. ^"'^^
cannot resign or remft Hi? if... Alniighty Arm, if you
treasure. ^ "'" ^°P'' ^^^^'^ ^re your earthly

of fefc:"^^^^^^^^^ ^i; ^f« -s' "P- '^^ God

need not fe A" r. ?,' ^ :r4t w^t^"'^' ^^^ ^-
hand-and your head-finrUo do ^ whatsoever your

an4awo.dtSTalS^Sr=^;^

■»

184

AMERICAN WORRY,

happiness and usefulness. It is to her the only key to
the mysteries of her nature; the only explanation of the
fact that she is at all. Her capacity for love and for
sorrow ; the myriad ills contingent upon possible irregu-
iaritie.s m her complex physique; the dreary seclusion of
domestic life ; the helplessness and hopelessness of unfor-
tunate marnages-all these demand, for the mere present
endurance ot their weight, something more tender than
philosophy, stronger than stoicism. It was not in com-
parative speech that the Master said of Mary— gentle and
ovmg, yet with a thirst for the highest and best know-
edge-the ''real things "of life present and life eternal!
that made her obhvious of temporal cares •—

"But one iking is needful. She hath chosen the nood
part which shall not he taken away from her "

» ?

CHAPTER XIV.

WHAT THEN?

felr?Vllurtivel?'"oifS "^^ Education,' naid the Pro-

„.H^ *\^ 'u"^°^ catalogues which we have examined to-

^frZ'2 ^^^^^^' '"^ '^^'''" ^™""g *^^^ «t^dies appointed
tor each year, or semester, a list of " Electives." You can
take up one or more of these, or leave all alone, as inclin-
ation or convenience may prompt. Your action in either
case IS regulated by your sense of the expediency of
understanding something of this or that branch, as you
may foresee the needs of the ordinary life of ^irl and
woman, or by your desire to use it in making lor your-
self a career somewhat different from that of your fellows
There IS nothing in the letter or spirit of the preceding
chapter that condemns the healthy ambition to rxcel t f
special oranch, or to win the prize for general excellence

taineS h"'^^P'. '"^^"t "'^ "'^^^ «^^^«^^' '' not surely at!
tamed by steady, systematic application to the specific

tTm? °^<^h\*^°"r-:i^-V«> by doing well one thing at a

field, fixes his eye upon a definite point, and makes for
It with hand and foot. Giving to our metaphor a larger
meaning, we niay add that she who shapes all the sturdy
ot her scholastic course m accordance with a defin'4
purpose, will achieve something better and stronger than
she who lays stones idly, or who alters her plans from

%■

186

WHAT THEN ?

f'|!^

day to day One reason of tlie A^-u.>t of thorou-^lmess in
women s education is, unquestionaMy. the purioseloss
way in which it i.s conduct Jd. The best aim of t^e be't
scholar IS usually to .stand well in classed a^d in the
fulness of tune to be graduated with distinction. About
own slk^Jr" '!^I^P^^"P°" 0"« who loves study for its
renin. «il^; \" T'' '^ ^f emulation and faithful in

clas? " ifnl f ! ^T ^""T'^- ^^' '^""^ ^"'' «Je of the
class don t mind study. In fact they rather like it and

out not''^ ^T' ^"" " ^^ ^ ^^«^^- ^" t when hone t and
outspoken under pressure, they would avow that in heart,
^f not m voice, they echo Christopher Slys praise of the

W) ai :; en ?

"ther and his college-mates tell you that their
.s luirdly begun with the receipt of diploma and
ste°n i-. , • ;^^";7«n^e»^ent-pay with them signifies the first
step la tue real career-the unclosing and flingincr wide
the gate revealing the highway of Life. Thev have Ic-
tue^wf/'f^J^'^r'^ '"^^''"^^ -^ ^he haSs, ge ting
SoSs f}!r ''^«^"^\'^ "^ ''' suppleness and st?ength^
feo tar as the confirmed habit and manner of s^udv thp
conscience for prescribed tasks and continued aiqufsit on

falTo'Sd to^-rn^ *^" '^^^^^^"^^^ of yoranntur:
taKe It ott and toss it into a corner of the lumber-room to
gather dust and verdigris for the rest of your lie u its

sume1rTh:"Tt.^' ^^^'""^ '^'^^"^^ W you to !
suHie It. The mental discipline of home is so lax bv com

parison with that of school, that you scarcely feel it Zl
tor the excitement of receiving and paving 0111.! in ^•
parties concerts, operas, and other ^iKt k^^^^^^^^^^
the multitudinous and nmltifarious^ engagemenrrnown
in their collective form as " Society/' yo^u wS be S

Yoi
worli. i
degTf t\

WHAT THEN ?

187

otighness in
purposeless
of the best
and in the
on. About
tudy for its
faithful in
1 file of the
like it, and
honest and
at in heart,
•aise of the

camination

that their
ploma and
es the first
iging wide
r have ac-
ss, getting
i strength,
itudy; the
cquisition
ir armour,
3r-room to
life unless
vou to re-
t by corn-
el it. But
attending
ainments,
ts known
be bored

to extremest emmui by a surplusage of unemployed time.
*or a year or two your now pursuits will not ..all upon
even an intellectual palate. After perhaps tluee seasons
you wil begin to see things as they are, and yourself with'

%^-l t! »" ^*""" ''^"'''' '^^^^^ the i)roblem, " W at to Do
Witn It { staring you in the eyes.

U is pitiable and histructive to busy people, o see the
varieties ut behaviour in women who recognise the reality
of this situation and seek to overcome its irksomeness.
Iheumana3uvresare oddly like the whistle of the boy
passing oyer a lonely common in the dusk of evening who
IS not certain of his bearings, yet dare not waste tune in
retracing his steps. Our maturing maidens will not look
behind them ior iear of trooping phantoms of dead hopes
and joys that perished with the possession. Before lies
a misty land ot shadows. They are not frightened by
the pale gn.yness of the time; only cMlled at heart and
anxious to disprove to themselves that they are forlorn
and astray. "^

The majority and the most respectable of them bcffin
to dabble industriously in something, it matters little
what it IS, so ong as time and thoughts are engaged. A
catalogue of the hundreds of species of what is'kncwn aa
lancy- work to which this century alone has given birth
would show better than fifty formal treatises, the preva-
lence of this dabbling, and the commercial ingenuity with
which the desire has been fed. Crocheting, tatting, wax
work, paper flowers, mono-chromatics, decaicomanie, panel
and plaque painting in oil, mineral and water-colours, on
silk, china and board, Kensington and outline embroi.lery
-time and memny would fail me, and patience desert
my readers, wei'. 1 to prolong the inventory. Such and
a thousand other inventions of play which is work, and
work which IS play, are put forward in a f.ist succession
ot cheats to answer our question—" What then ? "

i„=f n "P^T^^"'"'!'''- =-'''' - •'''^-^"g -""= ^^7 winter,
just as we did when we were girls ? " says the heroine
to Coy m Miss Phelps's " Story of Avis."

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(716) 873-4503

188

WHAT TUEX ?

" Just the same," said Coy, " as we did when you
were at home six years ago. You know how it is with
people ; some take to zoology, and some take to religion.
That's the way it is with places. It may be the Lancers
and it may be prayer-meetings. Once I went to see my
grandmother in the country, and everybody had a candy-
pull. There were twenty-five candy-pulls and tatfy-
bakes in that town that winter. John Rose said in the
Connecticut Valley where he came from, it was mission-
ary barrels ; and I heard of a place where it was cold
coffee. In Harmouth. it's improving your mind.

"The amount I've read these last four years ! It
positively makes my head swim to think of the titles of
the books. ;

" And so we have the clubs. Sometimes, it's old poets
served hot, and sometimes it's plain history cut cold,
and it may be a hash of the fine arts, or even a ragodt of
well-spiced science. One winter, it was political econ-
omy. I had my first gray hairs that winter. But the
season we took the positive philosophy, they thought I
was going into a decline."

We laugh at the witty summary, but there is more
than one nerve ajar while we do it. It is all so aimless
and pitiful ! For — let it be noted — women do not use
their literary and scientific and fine-art clubs as men do
theirs, as an evening's relaxation from severe work, but
as a means of emplojdng minds that are rusting, and time
that is an incubuj upon the spirits. Nor do they all
really enjoy the farce. Coy tells the truth when she
confesses sighingly : —

" It comes hard on me ! Improving your mind is as
bad as old poetry."

(This in reference to the Chaucer and Spenser Clubs.)

Desultory reading and study — even a diet of well-
spiced science —will, at the best, only wet the appetite
for regular meals of more substantial food. It is far
more likely to solace the intellectual conscience of the

did when you
how it is with
;ake to religion,
be the Lancers
went to see my
ly had a candy-
ulls and tatfy-
lose said in the
it was mission-
ere it was cold
' mind.

our years ! It
: of the titles of

is, it's old poets
utory cut cold,
k^en a ragoAt of
political econ-
inter. But the
they thought I

there is more
is all so aimless
len do not use
lubs as men do
vere work, but
Jsting, and time
or do they all
ruth when she

'our mind is as

Spenser Clubs.)
I, diet of well-
it the appetite
00(1. It is far
Qscienee of the

WHAT THEN ?

189

many who care little for such pabulum, but covet the

tT«lnr/- "T^^i^° .^^^ ^^^'^•" It is neither na!
tural nor desirable for a whole community of women to
have tastes precisely similar. I know an accomplished
scientist who never read a dozen pages of Longfellow or
Whittier. and a true poet whose mathematical love wou?d
disgrace a public-school lad of twelve. The most sagadous
instructors and parents are liable to overrate the Impor-
tance ot" keeping up " certain branches of technical edu-
cat on Much of the curriculum of the college answers ex-
actly the same purpose with the mind that the use of salt
and alunri does in the manufacture of green pickles Brine
and astringert harden and colour the texture of the eher-
km or citron-nnd steeped in an infusion of these sub-
stances for a certain time. When firmness and the pro-
per degree of greenness are gained, the housewife sets
about soaking out all ta^te of the salts, that she may im
part to the prepared article its specific and agreeable
flavour by the means of sugar, vinegar and spices^

This homely illustration expresses the diflference be-
tween the action of general education in moulding the
mind and interpenetrating it with an aptitude for there-

XTthlr^'Z i'' ^f-^^' .P^°^^"^^ °f *h^t specialty •
which the Creator has designed for individual appropria-
tion At least one-half of the learning of the schod
ought to be soaked out and thrown away, yet a^pelim
niary and formative, it can not be dispensed with

Lite IS no more earnest nor the meaning of vour own ner-
sonal existence .nore clear on the morning s"ucceedin/the
chib-meetmg than before. Except for the occupation of
the evening and a faint sense of satisfaction at havin-.
been profatably (?) employed, you might as well have gone
to bed a eigh o'clock, or danced until midnight wi?h
the same everlasting set " of partners. Nor do the crlit-
tering generalities of benevolence and the development cf
the L>ivmity of Humanity content the practical woman
who wants work and a sphere. We have in days gone by

m :(!

190

WHAT THEN ?

cast much ridicule upon that last word, and the cravinr.
which prompts its use in the mouths of many in the hiH^
den thoughts of more, women who should b^^ honour d"
not despised. In this we cruelly and coarsely misintei

istic ot a commonplace soul.

The women who ask for some specific employment and

whT/^'^^'i^'" P^^'^^"* ^«^^^i°" ^^« usua% those
who are fitted by nature and education for somethincr hn
measurably better than taffy-bakes and a bash TheZe
arts Centuries of superficial trainincj have done their
work upon the masses of our sex. Thousands find tl e
gratification of every reasonable-I do not say rational-
desire in a couple of seasons of belleship and a suitable

SX .^^T' f """^ "^"^'y '' '^^'^^ individu lity
main y by zrrational caprices and the obstinacy which is
the stronghold of fools. "^

r.IilT-'^. ^1- ^^«^i^^"^. clergyman who, without the re-

and lowest of his hearers, has a habit of describing the
acn e of weakness in argument or absurdity of belief by
declaring from a n.etropolitan pulpit that the contemned
proof or tenet is " only fit for w^omen and child TMs

with his wife who is not a simpleton, gazing i: th ad-
miring eyes from the pastor's pew. ^

He may not voice the sentiment of his Guild • no-
were this the case, need we be over-ready to resent a
dassification our sex has so long and so far authored
Do we not prove ourselves to be children when weTeam'
l3ssons set by others, without reflection as to the end to
^e subserved by study ? When we catch our clpLln
o thought and opinion upon philosophy, reli.non-even
morals-from the man we love, or in default of his exist^
ence, from our nearest masculine neighbour ? When our
tempeijare abraded by petty rivalries, our energies ex-
hausted upon puerile pursuits ? When the standard of

WHAT THEN ?

191

that we can not smile, while we feebly protest ?

-way of makmg people better i, by u.aki^rthem h™
pier If you can elevate the tone of vnn ' litVlt ■ f

spent which you have given to cheerful conveise or ;„
the amusements you ought to have at yourZ '' "' '"

abseSoT'hor r r^j:Lt^tr ^\ "-

time. Therefore, be as happy as you can."

losetSstracrtTaskTnrr '"'° » t-'^.'^at it
become when ft is the*grand°ob^"ctT daVwe' ' Thi

^raiia'trA^i^^esTU^i^^^^^^^^

'^Tnrt:tf"i?f'^"-*»"^'°™^^^^
bitsirng^gS xr&nW "^-" "-"^"

sober judges oi Euinall^u'/eTnd^tn' '^^^fomnr^-
head that no pure-hearted gir! has any dcSd^f::;

m i

I f

{If

' ! Li:
.Ii

192

WHAT THEN ?

of conquest in her coquettish wiles. She simply wants
to " have a good time," and enjoys it as artlessly as do
butteitlies a waltz in the sunshine. It is not until the
sun has dried the freshness in the morning air, and she is
weary of the monotony of frivolity, that she begins to
hearken to the talk of match-making dowagers and un-
charitable gossips as to the propriety of settling down
before she gets to be an old story. She has had her fling,
say her seniors. Roses wilt fast in ball-rooms, and she
has been " out " five seasons, she is reminded in a friendly
way. If she does not leave Society, Society will leave
her. No woman can be Somebody in the world's eye for
half a dozen years. And the only honourable extinguish-
er of belleship is Wedlock.

By and by, my brig)it-eyed girl, I shall, GoD willing,
tell you what are my views of the Real Marriage. For
the present, suffice it to say that it is not to crouch so
meekly in the shadow of a husband that even the out-
Imes of your separate personality are swallowed up —
obliterated by his magnificent penumbra. Remember
the warning quoted a while ago :

" Bear in mind that you are, first of all, human beings,
and then, secondly, women."

To follow Miss Cobbe a step further :
"Laugh at the doctrine that you are a sort of moon,
with no ralson d'eire but to go circling round and round
a very earthy planet, or a kind of ])arasite, ivy or
honey-suckle in the forest. You may be, you probably
are, less strong, less clever, less rich, and less well edu-
cated than most of the men around you ; but you are a
rational free agent, a child of God, destined to grow
nearer to Him and more like Him through the ages of
your immortality."

Do you ask me at this point, with the unconquered
impatience of our sex : " What is the lesson of To-day
drawn from the foregoing Talk ? "

WHAT THEN ?

193

to a you^nr:it^et^^^^^^^^ would have meant

the pr ncipal of a school" nL llT" ^ T''""''' «^
*y ^nd include? If we wrid T ,!"^^ '^ ""^ «'>i-
^Hanged, and we with them Ti ^"^"^ ^^^ ^""es h'ave
tl^e fallen and diSntec^ratSJ f "' f "'^^^ ^"^^ ^ ''moment
years agone, were sonln^LT'^^'y-'''^^^' ^^^^' ^ovty
resisting the incursion o^f T^^ """^ '""^'''^ Quebecs ii
deeded "by Nature Pro v^lr^^'T T^ ^^' ^^''ritory
Opinion (thus were' we tauiT; ^^^.' ^^ «"' ^^d Public
the stronger part of mankind ^' ? ^ ^'^' ^" perpetuity to
g'rl had to defy the ^ensur. ^'n ' '-v ^^^^^"'ber when a
fellows and the as certain dL^^ "'."^ <'"!" "^ ^^^' ««hool-
she were bent uponTtuTyi-^^^l^^ EadT ^^T"'" ^^
as likely to give a maspnlin-? f ^" .^"C"^ was banned
twenty-five years ?h.u ^"f'' ^^ *^« """d. Within
Divinity say'^tha he hid n'''^ a celebrated Doctor of
"se wo.ienhad for sense an r: ^''" "^^^. ^'^ ^«« ^^^^
listeners convulsed wfth 1 " • '? ''' ?°™^"* <^f ^^Hned
a visit he had paid to tl^ T""'''*^;'^ ^'' description of
where he was " fb Irfcaf d J ?' n 1 \"^^'"^^^ ''^^^^^
syllogism crosswisr^ his thll *^' ^7' "^ ^^"^"^ *
logarithm with his soun W K ' °'' f swallowing a
pies were." he conLseT''n^?^''\!^"?^"^^ and Gr^eek
to his digestion." ' ""^^ ^° ^^« ^aste, nor adapted

^h^wJte Sion of ponuf.?" •'*^- '^"P"*^^? P^^J^^'^^.
im bruted ignoramus nowTwn T'"'^"" ^^^^^^^^ ^ut an
women to "round even Tlovtl^ !™!?"°°' the right of
as of the ^freotU.:r^\Z^T^^^^^^^^
door, and no man can shut if wl ,f •^'"^ ^^ "P^n
or not rests with yourself '*^'' ^°" ^^" enter

194.

WHAT THEN ?

Whatever may be the stability of the provision made
for daughters, single and married, in other countries, the
terrible fluctuation of American fortunes is a continuous
object-lesson, enforcing the need of preparedness in the
women themselves to meet reverses and override poverty.
If the washerwoman's daughter of to-day will ride next
week in her carriage, diamonds on the fingers hardly dry
from the suds — the millionaire's child, satin-wadded from
her birth to avert the contact of everything common and
unclean, may, by one twist of the wheel, be driven to earn
her bread by the penny's-worth before she is thirty years
of age. The vicissitudes of the happier middle-chiss, if
not as violent, are well-nigh as frequent as the changes
that befall those in the higher and lower walks of life.
When the small merchant, or farmer, or mechanic is ovei-
taken by the storm of adversity, his boys, as a rule, land
on their feet. They have been educated in the expecta-
tion of earning their livelihootl, and the means — be it
brain-culture or manual skill — by which to achieve this
have been given to them. The (laughters, as a yet more
general rule, are, to put it strongly, half-t lught to do
nothing. They have had a cenain number of years'
schooling ; can strum a few pieces on the pi.mo, wi'ite a
fair hand, maybe " do " a little in crayons or oils, and dote
upon fancy-work. Besides these they hiive no capabili-
ties beyond those of a common housemaid.

In pursuance of our plan of drawing arguments from
facts, and our illustrations from real life, let me give a
specimen sketch of the class I have depicted.

A young girl came to me during the term of my
managership in a Board of Employment for Women, in
search of a situation. She was nineteen ; comely,
healthy, and talked with modest propriety of language
and demeanour. Her story was a sad, but by no means
an uncommon one. Her mother had married a second
husband when this girl was six years old. The step-
father would not be bothered with the child, and she was

WHAT THEN ?

195

iments from

this else r„°tl,e woild S ''"' '"^'^ '"'■ " better than any-
<neA\ZZ^tl tlTtaL' ""^ I-- godfather had

must not expect to eat the bS of chari tv lit'' "".*
of a fortn.ght ahe must go out into the worid " ""'

a..wHh jshow^^ itS:^i?e;:^-iJLrj^

sheUd„S'"?.l'"would'"^h''"^°' ^"•""^ »-k."
pendent/' ' *"" """='' "^''^"^ than be de-

;; What can you do V I inquired

am tZA'"T^^F " "'",' ■''='>°°' ■" ^'i the reply " r
Hm'Tu'rel fo'uVd'trhV'' a'""? nicely wiZ them'
too far adranced In,^ 1 T' l'°""^f "'"J' "'»"■<= not
up to fmction" •• ""'''''^^"d arithmetic quite well,

thiip™/? :airdouat"?Tndirrti;'°"'^ '-

taught by women who have lid SlrTonce in Itl *"

Siantr^e^rt^irr^^-^"^^^

wen, you tell me. Can you also cut and

196

WHAT THEN f

fit ? Do you know anything about dressmaking ? A
good dressmaker can always get plenty of work."

" No, ma'am. My aunt used to cut out everything,
even my underclothes, for me, and we had a dressmaker
in the house every spring and fall."

" I might get you a place as saleswoman in a store,"
I mused, " if you were quick at figures ; or, as appren-
tice to a milliner or dressmaker; but you would receive
nothing for, perhaps, three months, or so small a sum
that it would not pay your board. A factory life is
hardly what I should choose for you," glancing at the
delicate features and the slight figure so lady -like in its
cheap mourning, " and would bring you in ver}' little
until you became expert at the work, Then, too, the
associations are rough and disagreeable."

" Yes, ma'am ! I know," said the girl, meekly.
She was drooping like a cut house-plant in the incle-
ment atmosphere into which she had been thrown. The
sleet rattled against the windows in the intervals of our
dialogue. My heart bled for her, so young — and the
world was so wide and bleak ! A happy thought struck
me. I offered my ultimatum in a livelier tone :

" You cannot do better than to take a place in a fam-
ily," I proposed. " I know of one where just such a per-
son is needed. The husband is a mechanic, earning
excellent wages, and living comfortably in a small house
on the outskirts of the city. The young wife applied at
our Bureau yesterday for some one who would be willing
to assist her in general housework and look after a year-
old baby. Her " help " would be treated quite as an
equal, and have it in her power to make valuable friends
and secure a permanent home. You would be very safe
there, and I hope, satisfied."
The child burst into tears.

" Oh, madam ! don't ask me to do anything menial !
I was brought up so differently that the mortification
would bre.ak my heart."

I'*

WHAT THEN ?

1.07

Starvation was the

Vet Mho was fit for notl.in- else
alternative of hon.sohol.I servfce

In more direct tmn^^ J ^ '^''"'? ^"^^'" ''"«in««'* ?
own resources how ',] r" """'! ^^''^^^ "P«» ^^''^
necessity for c .'.inHhis "o 2^ ^'* ^""'' ^'^•"^' ^ '^"'^^
foreseeing, it afar'off ton -^ T"""' ^^° 8^-a<lually that,
your forces and dc^lol ,,'"'" ^^^ ^^1"^ ^" gather up
financial disasters ^Tur^ !"' ^'^'"" ^" *^^« ««'«'•
volcanic ori.nn br L^h.^' r""^7 ^';' earthquakes of
the graduafse'ttU^fof "pHeaval with overthrow ; not
the advance of rS U „\";^,^"I\foundations in which
sinking floors sicnth^t 2T 'fu ^^ •''^'^^*' ^^"« ^"'1
doomed dwe iinl^ So 1 ^\' T' *" «^« ^''^"^ ^he

you would not beash^medfo Tor^Tt ''^""*^^ ^''''
know what to do anrTnl i. . ' ^"*^ ^^^ ""^^ fii-st

prentices are not ellsupZiT t' ''-' ''''''' '': ^P"
easy when the hahif nf i^^ • ^' ",P^ ^'^ apprenticeship
The"^ busy can alwu s t^T^- ^'"' ^^"^" into desuetude^
independU of oSl.f^^'^'"««^to He who is

depend upon him U .^''^"'tance will find that others

els? is so rcetXl asVu^c^ss" S S^^ ''f "°^^^"^
impotent than impotencv Tb. «h .•''^ ^''^ ^" "^'°^«
with the Jack of cotioif'tbrnn •'^'^'^? P^^'^ ''^i'«
There is a naturartravuktion o? '"^P^^^L"^^^^ ^^^^'■•
into strong and a6^/hands ' "'' ''^'''^ ^^ P°^''«^

" lelrl'g^ hX^ti^^^^ !^^, ^^^"-^--' f- the

Four decades must elan o^.l'"-^^'^'^ '"."-'^^^^ ^^"g"i»e.
fear of that wTch k & T ^T ^'^^^'^'^ y^^'^'^^^ «f
and difficulty a spur Yon .''"'' ^'f^' '' temptation
brother who comXtes his In'" "^"t«"^Pt"0"« of the
upon a profession ask nfnl "T, ^T' ^''^'^'^^ ^^^^ding
tools to select and hot f !?*^^ ^^^ ^^^ '^^"^^ what

in what walk of lifeTif "fb '^^j^^.P^^^j ^^ i« certain
his pursuit To vour l.^i . "^ ' ^^' '"^ ^^'^^^^ will be
i^ it- lo your ardent imagmatiou that word

198

WHAT TIIEK ?

"pursuit" IS expressive. His "wnlk" would bo with
you, a run — if you were pressed or distanced, a race.
You suspect indolence or a want of balance in one who
" has not thought very much about the matter," and
opines, ten days before the commencement, that " there
is no especial need for haste in making up a fellow's
mind."

Your career is mapped out for you by Sex and Cir-
cumstance, you su{)pose, when yo'i take your future into
thoughtful consideration. For two, maybe three, pos-
sibly four years — you do hope it will not be five or six !
you will live at home, and be happy all day long, with
Mamma as matron, chaperone and confidante, and Papa
as banker. Then — Prince Charming will settle the re-
maining twenty or forty years of your temporal existence
as suits his royal will. Trusting him in advance, you
doubt not that he will combine the best dispositions and
deeds of father and mother. You will love him very
dearly, and he will suffer you to want for nothing. If
Common Sense hints that even princes and predestined
husbands have died and left widows weighted by help
less orphans ; and suggesting this seriously reminds you
that putting oflT the answer to my " What Then ? " ten or
a dozen years does not get the query out of the way, the
gay confidence of your age comes to your aid. All the
" other girls " liv9 as you are doing. If you and they
are laying up nothing available against a rainy day, your
improvidence is sanctioned by custom and truest friends.
You will pull through in some way. You have always
managed to get along.
That is, others have managed you, and for you.

'v5

CHAPTER XV.

CALLED.

" God bcndfl from out the deep, and savs

' r gave t,hee the preat gift of Life •^'
Wast thou not called in many ways '

Are not my earth and heaven at strife'
I Kaye thee of my seed to how, '

lirum'est thou me my hundredfold » '
t/an 1 look up with face aglow

And answer, ' Father, here is gold ? ' "

-tTames RussEi L Lowell.

m all the ages past, or will create in the cycles vtt Zt

».on.anaby the very' circumstance of ymf Ir^roT^J^l.
among the hvmg, have given bonds for trLtWul £-

200

CALLED.

W^+'},r!/''' duties assigned you. In this march in ^
treason ""^ ^ substitutes, and desertion is liigh

It is a favourite among other flippant sayino-s of those

HHtv Zr'"'" ^'''; '^"^^^^" in intelle/tual respoS
bihty, that we can not as a sex. grasp cardinal principles.
That our food-mental and spiritual-must be divided
into bits convenient for us and laid, trimmed and seasoned
upon our pla es. That we have a habit in discuW a
broad general topic, uf descending to personalities." That

?naf/2vT?^'''/^"''"'T' and assume deductions
ma style highly confusing and exasperating to the manly
mmd It is hardly consistent with belief In these femi-

Tki-nrfS"™?-'! ^^^^ ^"". ^'^^^^y ^^^^'^"g f«r work of
^ip« .r^'^^''''^^^ apportioned to our tastes and ener-
Dointsin'fbpT? ^' something better than decimal
H«Tl 1^ t r^"""" '""^ ^"^ ^^ ^^«<^ "P ^* the done of our
day should be diagnosticated as a fever-whim, and treated
with the sedative powders of general utility maxims.

for nl^T ^""^ ^""'^ '^\" .^^ ^^PP^'" i« a draught ready
:hJuu^^''VT1' ^°^ ^^ ^'1 «*^tes of the System, it
should be well, shaken and taken three times a day.

" 5?;PP'';'"' l»aPPier far than thou.
With the laurel on thy brow,
She that makes the humblest hearth
iiovely to but one on earth,"

Ind nlpfwi'')^ ^°' 'Pl'"'^^^i affections, mental anemia,
and plethora, lowness ot spirits consequent upon persona
insignificance and for unwholesome ambitions^ No famX
should be without it. ictimiy

Mrs. Hemans wrote "Corinne at the Capitol"— un-

tei'^'"'"^''- ^^*\' "^"'^ *™« when she was drawing
from the exercise of her poetic talent solace for outraged
affection, and substantial support in pounds, shillinc^s

CALLED.

this march in -

201

and mind of eveiV CfonoW'^ "^""^^ '^"«fy the heart
"ant truth of theVace of S -""T'^"- ^^«« the X
ed by all who enter upon tfoffi "^^^? ^« ^-^'Preh^enf.
come mto her Kingdom and tL^-'''i^^"^^^ ^"^ have
nigh, even at our dSors T^i t ^^"gdom of Heaven be
must also be his 'rate." Itroi^in '"^'^"f'^ "^^^P'" ^^e
thy. fit to work with him and for h" ""''^ ^' ^« ^^mpa-
hi« despondency and sal vp ?1 h '"" ^' ' • *^s to cheer
cherishes, she m^^? le:d ■' m st'bTh "^.""''t ^^^ ™«th"
the copyist she directs. To efftct th. '^^. ^H "^^^^^ ^^^
the perfection of physical, intdleeuafr.^' «he requires
Therefore-and I beg vourTtS- ?^ "^'^"^^ «^nity.
-she who is best qualifiprM. 7^f tion to this sequence
5?r kind, in whomThoS and '' '^'"^^ *« herse^lf and
disciplined, energies Stl! Sl T"^? ^^" healthfully
exercise, will fill the SoS^^^^ ^^l^ strengthened by
better than she whose spCsSirm ""^^'''^ ""^ "^«the?
the gyrations of a dra-on fll >. ^^ ^^ symbolised by

cIamation-point,and a'l she^a^'don^^rr^^'^ ^y^^ «-
happier her race, by a cipher Thp ^ ^t""^^^ ^' ^"^ke
of character, but is the Sodimenf' f""^" ^"^"'^ ^^^ce
degenerate into insipidity rrharnen . ""f ^"^^^^^^^ty, will
ishness with time. The best f}i«r "l^" ^^"^S^ry-peev-
niaterial is that it may ripen witt "^\^' f P^cted of the
saccharine flatness as-^maCs The T "''^"'^ ^"^^ «"«h
esculent. The most desSle ,nn\ ^''T'K ^" unpopular
woman is also the bes fo « e swTe ?" ^'' '^'' ^"^^"^^
ot a generous temper with markefe" *". ^^'' ^^'^ ""^^^
heart and thoro,,gK conscientfotne^^^ ^ ^'^^-^

^y^^^:^^::;^''^''- ^- ^^--rsei,

you are to attain th,?nn1 -i, ''"'«'™"ie by what path
l-Bcovered it, to waik ther^i.! «"'"' "^ ""^iand haJ^Tng

202

CALLED.

There are more reasons for the press of women who are
obliged to earn their livelihood, into the profefion of
teaching than the one usually assigned and accepted -
namely.that it is an eminently respectable occupatK)n

and involves little physical drudgery I .^^^^'^^f ^^"^^^er
a being of the mother-sex to gather together and into her
care, tl brood over and to instruct creature, younger a^^
feebler than herself. The n^^^^ satisfactory subsUtute for a
family of her very own, is a school where this instinct can
be Wght intoplrtialplay. Shelikes the crowding <^^^^^^^
her knees of childish forms, the ^uch and c Ingmg ot
little hands ; the echo of her sayings in the thr^ll^^S f j]^
of voung voices. It is a comfort to the lonely-heai ted to
know that she is looked up to and believed in, and a pure
joy to be asked for thdt which she has to give^ In leading
the lambs of the flock, she is herself led by Holy Mother
Nature. Furthermore, by virtue of her gentler «/ nP^f^^s
she remembers as men seldom do, the pamfulness and
exact succession of the steps by which she gamed such
knowledge as she can boast, and is merciful to the small
feet now treading them. She is assiduous in removing
stumbling-stones, lenient as to slips and stumbles

Admitting these almost universal qualihcations, ot sex
for the teacher's work, it yet remains true that a genume
talent for imparting instruction is far more rare than we
are disposed to imagine. It is one thing to comprehend a
principle or a subject in its entirety; another, to be able
to put either or both into intelligent practice,— a third
and far more arduous undertaking to convey knowledge
and the right use of it to the mind of another person, parti-
cularly if that mind is comparatively or wholly untrained.
Unless you have this gift,-for a gift it is, and invaluable
in its way,— do not select teaching as your calhng. Your
business must be a vocation, or you will be a pretender,
most probably a failure, however resolutely you may per-
si.st in it. wh«n evervbodv else has discovered your blunder.
It is always true to some extent that we are likely to

CALLED.

203

jmen who are
profession of
i accepted, —
.e occupation,

tlie nature of
r and into her
■-, younger and
ubstitute for a
is instinct can
rowding about
id clinging of
ihrilling treble
ely-hearted to
in, and a pure
ve. In leading
r Holy Mother
er sympathies,
sinfulness and
le gained such
111 to the small
s in removing
imbles.

ications of sex
that a genuine
e rare than we

comprehend a
her, to be able
ctice, — a third
vey knowledge
;r person, parti-
lolly untrained,
and invaluable
•calling. Your
36 a pretender,
y you may per-
id your blunder.
re are likely to

do well that which we like to do, and vice versa. When
you can yoke and drive Duty and Desire together there is
great gain in speed and in ease of progress.

But the field is vast, and the policy of cutting up large
plantations into small farms is rapidly growing into favour
in other sections and departments of civilization than the
bouth. With the increase in the number of colleges and
of those seeking a share in the advantages of a^liberal
education, comes the natural division into " specialties."
_ "The electoral system which"— laments the Professor
in "Avis," —"is in danger of becoming so threatening to
our Universities."
Even he recognises in it '■' an element of Justice."
Women are no longer merely teachers,, or governesses.
Ihey are ehgible to "chairs" in Institutes and Collecres
and have the right,— one which, by the way, they seld'om'
exercise— of writing themselves down, "Professors."
This modification of ancient landmarks heightens the
expediency of shaping your electoral course of preparation
in the schools in accordance with the original bent of
your mind and tastes.

We will assume, for the sake of illustration, that you
burrow among the roots of dead languages with the zest
of a truffle-dog. That test of the true linguist— born,
not made— the disposition to think in the tongue he is
studying, the incorporation into the structure of his own
mind of its spirit and genius,— all this is to you a matter
ot course German is a delight, French a pastime, Italian
a bagatelle. Yet in arithmetic, like my homeless half-
orphan, you could hardly teach up to fractions. To your
room-mate, the friend of your adoption, who has had a
part ot your every thought for two years, chalk, black-
board, and problem are what the sight of the sword was
to the disguised Achilles spinning among the maidens
Music is the vital air of one school-fellow, and mephitic
vapour to another who covers the fly-leaves and mam-ins

V i\

204

CALLED.

1 1

• 1

of her text-books with caricatures and vignettes; to whom
every face is a "study" and curve and colour are a living
joy. There is one girl in every large class who would
willingly v/rite compositions for all the rest ; another who
is the referee upon whatever pertains to literature, clas-
sical or current ; and still another, who devours historical
tomes until you fancy that she must be sutfocated by the
dust of the ages.

These varieties and indications of taste are tokens of
her "calling" to each of you, to be noted heedfuUy and
consulted before your decision is made. So with the apti-
tude in knotting ribbons and making up and over bonnets
and gowns, the " French touch " that have constituted
you the family milliner and dressmaker ; the sure and
ready ear that would be invaluable in a telegraph oper-
ator; the lightning speed of finger-play joined to quick
apprehension requisite in the practice of stenography;
the correct eye and the "knack" for household arrange-
ment and decoration which might, if cultivated, bring
you into fashion and fortune as an architect.

I have enumerated but a few of the avenues by which
women can reach the vantage-ground of self-support.
With advancing and deepening civilization the number
is a':<;mented. The fostering: of artistic tastes creates a
demand for products of ingenuity and skill which were
unheard of a quarter-century ago. Models for adver-
tising and holiday- cards, and the more dignified etchings
for illustrated books and periodicals; patterns for wail-
paper, friezes, dados, and carpets, — the catalogue is limit-
less until the bound of human caprice is reached, the
fertility of fashion exhausted.

You may never need to practise any trade or profession
for the purpose of earning daily bread for yourself and
those dependent upon your exertions. It may — I pray
that it will — be the lot of every girl who reads these lines
to dwell in a sheltered home, maintained and protected
by those who love her and esteem the care of her a privi-

CALLED.

205

ettes; to whom
ur aro a living
ss who would
; another who
iterature, clas-
ours historical
located by tlie

are tokens of
heedt'uUy and

with the apti-
d over bonnets
ve constituted

the sure and
elegraph oper-
ined to quick

stenography ;
ihold arrange-
itivated, bring
t.

lues by which
self-support.

I the number
Lstes creates a

II which were
ils for adver-
lified etchings
ierns for wall-
iogue is limit-
reached, the

i or profession
yourself and
may — -I pray
ids these lines
md protected
of her a privi-

lege. Nevertheless, father and husband will sleep fllore
soundly by night, and think the more calmly of the last
deep sleep for the knowledge that daughter and wife will
not be pauperized by the death of the one bread-winner
of the family.

With all that I have said, I have merely touched upon
the externalities of this subject in enlarging upon the
prudential measurie of preparing for the worst while hop-
ing for the best, and designating some of the means to
this end. The subtler, more pervasive, and, in an immense
majority of cases, the paramount advantage of selectino-
and mastering a profession, consist in the effect upon the
woman herself.

Paradoxical as it may seem, popular sentiment has do-
creed from time immemorial that it is at once our business
as frail, dependent segments of mankind, to settle our-
selves in marriage, and our reproach that we seek, to the
utmost of our ability, to compass this purpose of our crea-
tion.

" Anxious and aimless," wrote the humane Governor of
the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, in recommendino-
Californian emigration to the superfluous seventy thou*
sand women within the bounds of the State.

" Anxious because aimless," would have been nearer the
mark. The liberated school-girl is exceptionally stupid
or facile of adaptation to extraneous influences if, after
the novelty of her long vacation has subsided, she does
not miss the beneficent discipline that has regulated her
thought and action for seven, eight, oftentimes ten years
past. Accustomed to systematic employment, she be-
comes discontented and at length pettish and blasee with-
out it. The stronger she is in mind and character, the
loftier in her range of ideas, the sorer is the ennuL
Society, the casual resort and diversion of the men she
secretly despises as her intellectual inferiors, is adjudged
all-sufficient for her, — not entertainment, but mental ali-
ment. She has a good home ; a father who gives her all
M

'':n

W 'J

^06

CALLED.

the new gowns she asks for, and a liberal allowance of
pocket-money ; a mother who never grumbles at a house-
ful of lively young people ; brothers who escort her with
phenomenal courtesy (in brothers) to rout and fSte ; and
a wisely-weeded visiting-list of acquaintances. She is
popular,— so long as she carefully masks the truth that
she IS not the conventional " young lady," nor quite satis-
faed with her manner of life. What more can she desire
when to these present goods provided by the gods is
joined the prospect of marrying well in due season ?

At the peril of being considered "eccentric" and the
loss of the favour of " the men," on whose sultanic grace
her promotion depends, let her asseverate that she re-
gards the caterpillar nestling in a secluded corner to spin
itself out of sight in yards upon yards of golden floss a
more worthy creature than the butterfly, that cuts the
silk into useless lengths that she may flutter her half-day
on painted wings on rose-scented sunshine. Jt is idle to try
to dupe ourselves and others into the conviction that, in the
change of times and beliefs, the fashion in this particular
has varied from that which obtained of yore. The man
about town, the typical degant, who is as inevitably a
standing adornment of ball and party as are the ices and
bouquets, admiressensiblewomen— assuch— nomore than
did the Lovelaces and Clement Willoughbys of Richard-
son's and Fanny Burney's day. The best-dressed girls,
the graceful and indefatigable waltzers, the proficients in
'persiiiage; the "cool hands" in flirtation, attract the
densest swarm of light- winged and light-brained Society
moths, I have heard veteran coquettes acknowledge that
the game, when won, was not worth the candle. But
*W burn it, all the same, dov/n to the lowest snuflf.

With all our modern improvements upon popular pre-
judices, some very sensible people likewise bse patience
with a girl who dares think and utter such heresies as I
hiive quoted, or be otherwise than content to do her duty
r-cut out by Mrs. Grundy, and basted by Custom— in the

CALLED.

207

happy IsTe^aJi^lot'^'P'^^^'^-"^^ -*^-=-. ^^t be

the experiment wiThZr7nH *^ '' T"" ^''''' ^"^ ^^P^^ts

old maid to induiror tot; h^^ becomes too confirmed an
the. latter cZeXZllvhr^^^ In

wounded,herheartsZ,mreainra t'fJki?^^^ '^'^^
struck suitor of Mollv Ro J« u ^^^^^; -L-ike the moon-

meat foA"erthoX^/hands''%tlT '*^ '""""^;

Sifjl

208

CALLED.

of this Horfc, bo the work nothing highor than designing
patterns for wall-paper, or painting china to order, or
even making up dresses and cloaks Ifor the modiste's
family connection at prices that enable her to deposit a
goodly sum every year toward a fund for foreign travel,
or other coveted luxury.

In the delightful "Autobiography and Correspondence
of Mrs. Delany," we find her, at the age of fifty-nine,
makmg cornices of shells for the Deanery at Delville •
for her " bow-closet, festoons of shell-flowers in their
natural colours." " And," continues she, " I have just fin-
ished running Tvith mosaic ground, in crimson silk, chintz
covers for the couches and stools." In the same year she
wrote " a moral romance for her own amusement," illus-
trating it with " drawings tinted in sepia." At the age
of seventy-five she invented the art of making paper
naosaic flowers, and completed in eight years one thousand
plants.

" Sir Joseph Banks used to say of these that they were
the only imitations of nature he had ever seen from
which he could venture to describe botanically any plant
without the least fear of committing an error."

Dr. Darwin also praises them as " wonderful in effect
and their accuracy less liable to fallacy than drawings."

Busy, contented, happy, and honoured to the last day
of her eighty-eight years, she has left us a precious com-
mentary upon the beneficial effects of a life filled to the
full with various useful and ennobling pursuits. She
who fears to work beyond her strength and thus abridge
the term of her mortal existence can not consult a more
■pleasing and suggestive memoir of one who dreaded
neither labour nor death.

If, for women modestly endowed with intellectual
gifts and unambitious, there are so many spheres of occu-
pation and possibilities of usefulness, what shall be said
of tho.se who might be eloquent with tongue or pen ;
whose trained touch as nurses would solace the suflferino-,

CALLED.

209

who, as educated physicians, could bring quiet into Sick-
rooms where the very appearance of a medical man must

InTafarm"? '' ^^''"''^ ""^ ™"^^y' ^^^^^^ ^°^»«^^«

1 ^5^u*^ w"^ Carlyle-while he was in his way sincere-

Ll^fv,'^ *f *^' ^^^' .^S°^^ ^*^°'^*^y «f him^kept her
above the depressing influence of what was virtual

bondage from their marriage-moi-ning until his stout
heart was riven at her grave-was assuredly the re vei^e
of optimistic m his views of woman's talents and destiny.
He held with the pugnacity of a British bull-dog born
beyond the Tweed, to St. Paul's unceremonious formula
of advice to the Church under the conduct of the young
JBishop of Ephesus : ^ j/uuug

" I desire, therefore, that the younger women "— rthp
New Version has" mrfot.s-or women") " marry b ar
children, rule the household, give none occasion to the

afterSn^' ^^^^^'"^'' "" ^^''^^^ '"^^ ""'' ^"^"^^ ^^^^e

But in response to direct interrogation on the subiect

of women physicians, the honest Scot "sends all he has

to^say^as a friend for the' use of friends," and to th^s

"It seems furthermore indubitable that if a woman
miss this destiny " (marriage) "or have renounced i^she
has every right, before God and man, to take up whatever
honest employment she can find open to her in the
world. Probably there are several, or many employments
now delusively in the hands of men, for^whichTomen

stg',x:r ^^^^ ''~''''''''^^- '^'-^-^' --^i;

"That medicine is intrinsically not unfit for them is
proved from the fact that in much more sound and
earnest ages than oui-s, before the medical profession ;ose
into being, they were virtually the physicians ^d
Hin-goons as well a« sick-nurses-all that the world Cd
Their form of mtollect, their sympathy, their wondeX

210

CALLED,

acuteness of observation, etc.. seem to indicate in fli«m
pecuhar qualities for dealing with diseaseTanc \videStly
have n'^r departments (that of female 'diseased) they
have quite peculiar opportunities of being useful » ^

nSt women /"' ^''^'^''^ admission his conclusion,
that women-any woman who deliberately so deter-
mines-have a nght to study medicine ; and that t
might be prohtable and serviceable to have facilities o
at least possibilities offered them for so doinj" ' '

I sh^ldTike''"to Sr' ""^T".' '^ extended a narrative.
ilTai 1 H^ ^"" '^''^* «ome missionary women

who are at once physicians and religious teacherTh^ve

anrinT^dfS^' nW T" °' ^'^^"^^ '^ distanUanX.
anaintnedaik places of our own continent When T

read and hear the stories of their work and their success
how the vision of the mystical leaves of healing for the'
nations has been almost literally fulfilled in the m n Ltra
tions to afflicted bodies and mi.4hapen souls on tie part
of the sisterhood whose long despised sex is one wUh
that of her who bore the Lord of Life mv h-art thmht
high with thankfulness. Solemn o d Wd^ sound
through my soul;-the pa,an« of those who afterlonf
conflict, see the turn of the battle in their favou "- ^

" ^Md, the lord hath proclaimed tmto the end of Up

Not that you, my child, without vocation for medical

tudy or the so-cal ed missionary field, are toTSe

these heroic women m aught save .steadfast purposTand

Tr ^ou " Bu? i: P-«^«-^-«,-f whatever litiJLkls set

lor you. But ju.st in proportion as the phv.sician can

abour more effectively than the m£,.ss of m ssfon trcher^

by reason of her mastery, of a profes.sion, you can act you,-

f'ALLED. 2H

Finn f^f^^^?'' '^^'^^r"' "^^y ^^ y°"^ t'^l^nts andposi.
tion for the clear un,l,„-stan.Iing of what you c*vn do best
and the determination to excel in vour callincr '

lie just to your mind in bestowmir upon iTthe nronor
nutriment. Be .nerciful to it in givtng'it enould oTth s
to sustain its powers. I wish that I could make you un!
derstand now before you make the experiment on your
own account, how the frivolities of the stereotyped S
life the hours appropriated to dress and the shims
of etiquette; the froth of the chit-chat that passerf^r
conversation ; the so much worse than froth of Lsin
about one's neighbours and friends,-in brief tho rSd

an7bettrr' ^^^^tIo-- mental and morlftone
and belittle the whole being. Avoid this latter evil --
belittling and narrowing - almost as sedulously as
you would impurity. Stand firmly upon the higher
plane won by familiar intercourse with^naster-minds
Know and maintain for yourself that Life has noble;
aims than the fascinatioi,, for vanity's sake of so manv
gallants per season. Reject the temptation oterJnate
the unworthy triflings; to curb*^ the waywardness
of your fancy ; o gratify your prudent well-wishers and
essay the nove ties of an untried estate by entering upon
a marriage which, however eligible in the eyes of otWs
IS not as you own in your secret soul, what you would
have chosen of your unbiat3d will ^

So far from the election and study of professions bv
women acting unfavourably upon domestic life. I believe

m^ ^^nf' ^ 'f''^\ '^^°"»^ examination of a gu!
ment and examples on both sides of the question, that the

thfse ^t ^7''' 'T'''' '^ '^' H°«^^ -^« promoted by
these. She who need not marry unless won to the adop-
tion of the state of wife by pure love for him who seeks
her, IS hkely to make a more deliberate and a wfser
choice of a husband than she who has done little Zee

she put off lono- clothes but drs^arr »n-l l ^"i-^c aiuce

her other half." '^"^ """^ ^""^ ^°*^ ^^^^'^^ ^^''

SIS

CAlttS.D.

.4-wmtii.nr for a part-a-ner ! " sings tho chubby jjirl
of hvo in tho old- asfnoned ^nrno of " Oats, Peas, BeSns
and Barley-o ! At fifteen, .she chants it, joyousi; with

nitT" ? f.'r,*«''ri'i'it«- At five-and-twenty. the thin-
ning band still raise the refrain, but with a rmaver of un-
ejismess m tho.r voices. Women who have " made their
market smile pityingly; obdurate men derisively, and
gibe a. the unwoood maiden's anxiety to avert a posthu-
mous calamity the anticipation of which freezes tho
marrow in the bones of the girl of the period.

Sav^ what you will of the independence of single
women, said a girl of twenty to me. " I wouldn't be-
levo one upon oath who told me that she didn't dread
the obloquy of old-maidism. For my part, I hope to
marry. I m not ashamed to acknowledge that I intend
to take the first good offer I have. Thfnk of the S-
grace of having one's maiden name inscribed upon her
tomb-stone ! 1 am sure I should never survive the dia-

a/? l^®^^^^^"«''^*^"ess she was unconscious of the bull
At forty-five she is single still. Let us hope charitably
that her righteousness sustains her. That is to say that
she expresses some ooze of emollient from the conscious-
ness that if celibate, it is not her fault. The knowledge
of duty faithfully performed should be as Mr. Richard
Swiveller .said of an umbrella— "somethino-"

To return to a pleasantcr topic :-The discipline of
systematic work, with a fixed purpose, induces a patient
habit of mmd that tells to immense advantage in the dis-
charge of the duties of wife, mr.,her. and house-k^epir
bhe who, to secure time for her " specialty," has L .,.-'■?
to divide and apportion her time judiciously, and to econ-
omize, what wa,s once called in my hearing, the "between-
itie.. will not be dnven into peevishness and despair by "
the n ,3haps of days when "everything goes wrong," and
a j:o, , .vould be deafened by the clalh of seeminelv
antct;^o ., bJi/piioas. He who has built up his fbf-

CALLED.

chubby girl
Peas, Boans
yoiisly, witli
ty, tho thin-
mver of un-
' made their
isively, and
rt a posthu-
frcezes tho

e of single
'ouldn't be-
idn't dread

I hope to
at I intend
)f the dis-

upon her
ve the dis-

' the bull,
charitably
y say, that
conscious-
cnowledge
'. Richard

cipline of

a patient

n the dis-

3e-keeper,

S 1( '-nr-l

1 to econ-
between-
espair by
mg" and
eemingly
' his tbr-

2in

">^' which she can not espy nick un nnrl 1„,. f n ^'

otherandnSsa^vduti^^ 1"'°.""'' ''»»'=«'> the mL,of

*(?rS »;f„^:t"'"'^"' """"""y -- '"is one of
"The muscles and tho bmin ««„ ^„i r ,.

Dr,

^eIo4"ir„^„CaTa",i^^i;™:t*it:irB'%

■I

i 4i

214

CALLED.

\r f

I like the quaint epithet for the long, straight seams of
muslin and linen, the hemming and backstitching, and
running and felling, that enter into " family-sewing." The
textual principles of art can be learned as well over a
mending-basket as in the school-room. The course of
reading recommended in connection with any branch of
science and literature is likely to be better digested if the
student takes it in slowly, reviewing each paragraph in
substance in the " betweenities " of threading her needle,
fastening ends and setting another dozen stitches.

Mary Blake, whose " Twenty-six Hours in a Day " is a
capital Mother's Manual, furnishes us with an epigram-
matic text here : —

" You have all the tim.e there is. Your mental and
moral status is determined by the use you make of it."

Eugene Scribe, in one of his comedies, shows up a bas-
bleu, who, blind to the intrigue her married daughter is
carrying on under her mother's very eyes, with her elderly
husband's handsome nephew, harangues the company in
her salon upon the effect of Mathematical studies in con-
trolling the Passions. As we read the moral, however, it
does not appear that the lecturer is not in herself an ex-
emplification of the benefits of her vaunted pursuit, but
that she has been remiss in the practical application of
the principle in her daughter's case.

One of the gems of available truth scattered among the
dreary sands of Rasselas, is Imlac's remark that " Many
persons fancy themselves in love, when in reality they
ai'e only idle."

CHAPTER XVI.

WHAT SHALL WE TO WITH THE MOTHERS ?

^^^n^ot:^?t!^:S'S :iin^ fi-t of «„ l^^^s upon the
COBBE, " Duties of Wonieny ^'" '" '^'^ Soodr'-FRANCFsPowEii

The girls were coming home ' ThpJr Qr.].^^i a
ended ; their home-lifp t^ \rr. ' i i^ school-days were

to be refurnished ih^hhlJt i:.l ^^^ parlours were
where aS wL wL ^ ?'^ ^*^'^"P ^ ^ music-room,
who was not eiVeXLTw ' "^^^'^^P^^^^^ise, while Eva
on the other side of re hall Ch ' /"..'^^ .^PartmentJ
in one sphere-thf dXL";.,,^^'^ ?[ *^" ^^^^ graduates
own bed-room 4noe th • ^"°<^^«^-must have her

floor, a lifftomelornpr 1 'T^'K'''''''' °" ^'^^ ^^^o^d
mamma'sVoTwanven un r I'^'^'^'i' ^«^°*«^1 *«

fact :ST.tcrrr, *s "- '^ ™"« p^-'=^ -. «.

11,

216 WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH THE MOTHERS ?

of the house. I shall be cozily comfortable there in the
evenings, and during the day it is a manifest convenience
to be upon the same floor with the kitchen. It was my
plan throughout" — hastening to check the demur she saw
hovering on my lips. " The prime object now is the girls'
comfort and happiness."

" I doubt if they will agree with you. They would
rather think, as I do, that the coziest, softest, prettiest
place of honour should be for her who, for all these years,
has spent and been spent in their service. From their
birth giving has been your part. It has been all outgo.
When will be the income, if not now that they are able
to go alone, are able to appreciate sacrifice and endeavour,
and to reward these aright and openly ? "

" I ask no reward excepit the knowledge that they are
happy," responded the true mother, softly.

The troubled smile returned. We have been friends
from girlhood, and she spoke nut what was in her heart.
" My day is over ! As you say, they are able to go
alone. Were I to drop out of their lives to-morrow, it
would make no difference to them or to their brother,
after the first shock was over. It is the natural lot of
mothers in our day. I should be content."
She put her hand on mine impulsively.
" Don't think it blasphemous, but I know how John the
Baptist felt when he said, ' He must increase, but I must
decrease.' Yet he loved the Lord better than he did his
own life. Mine are dear, affectionate children. I am
thankful that I have been permitted to rear such— very
glad and grateful ! I used to pray hourly, after my early
widowhood, while they were little things about my knees,
that God would spare my life until they were grown up.'
It came to me with a strange thrill, this morning, that I
might leave that petition out now ! "

" How old are you ? " I asked abruptly, for my heart
was swelling.

" Forty-seven. I was married at twenty-tiircf."

WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH THE MOTHERS ? 217

t was silent, because indignant and imnotont ' T»-;«

Knew ner, miased and mourned most bv the sons and
danghters who.se pride sho WM. I recalled her acUve

StSns'iThf st° vt t;? ■• '? ^■■'™

te.&a„.f^hSyhe^:frr'^V^jS^^^^^^
Shlil'T r"''»yi»g her pathetic « My day t ter "

thi tie^rr^aLd ttr^ ^A T^X

inscrS^thf J/T'^'-'',"''"™ "y work-stand a card
inscribed with a bit of wisdom evoked from Leslie Gold-

of seemingly cqaaVurgeKutrs °r„sS:7me''Z

^I ^j u y eye fell upon the silent mentor when I
returned home, still revolving the problem sot tor ^fhv
the morning call In the wSrld a't k^" in the hhLr?
offamil.es as in the individual life, somtthil musTrive
way in the warfare of ■■ Must-haves" with • llay-wa^ »

^ft m„ tlv „"""• "V"""' ' '"'<' j"^' heaXl:een?
01 tne multiplying similar instances of "children to th^

h^SVeen t£ Wb S' iirwheell ri^d''^"''" "'''"
por^t ^.lace upon the cir™mfoet!t ' 1*° t^eS

mother ,s authority, conscience. Bible. He dweUs
and develops under her shadow until such time as cus
govertr "•"' '' " "" -=»<-edt;Tutoirand

\jnien my youngest bom, at Ave yeai-s old came radi.
antly m ftom a walk with papa, aLyed foi The fit

'4..

»;! i'Y

"1 ;!

218 WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH THE MOTHERS ?

time in jacket and breeclies, the faithful woman who had
nursed him from his birth electrified us and drew from
nim a howl of anguish and mortification, by falling upon
her knees, clasping him in her arms and sobbing bftterlv
1 have lost my baby ! I have no baby now ! "
Ihe son setting out blithely upon his joui-noy to col-
lege warehouse or office, where he is to learn how to earn
Ills bread, the daughter, whose tears drop fast into the
trunk packed by "mamma's own hands" for the board-

3'f. "; *» f i'' *^" ^""''^ " '''^'' ^"^y «^y as sadly and
more truly, " I have lost iny mother ! " ^

vi Jrrfr, ^""'l comforter, boy and girl, may find at each
visit to the old home " mother "-as infancy and child-
hood know her-infallible and well-nigh omnipotent-
never, never more '. ^

Meanwhile, what of her who has learned from Nature
and through years of practice to be " mother," and that
alone ? The brood that went out from her, callow
chirping piteously for her care and nourishing, return
m such bravery ot fledging as half frightens while it fills
her with pride Their note is changed too. She listens

ot- r^i "? n "" "^^ f ^^^ ?^ ^^^ ^"'^ «^ the period and that
otthe fellow who " keeps abreast of the times." The
vital necessity of accomplishments unheard of in her day
ot pupilage, the cant of modern science, literature art
and progress in general are foreign to her ears, indigest-
ible by her comprehension. If she be very humble she
may comfort, even congratulate herself that she has
reared a race of demi-deities ; may survey their brilliance
m a tremor of delight from the obscure corner into which
she has crept, as a bat may peer from a rock crevice or
hollow tree upon the flight of eaglets in the sunshine.
But, human nature being what it is, the chances are in
tavx)ur of the supposition that the lowliest- minded will
teel aggrieved at her dethronement, albeit in favour of
her natural heirs. Eegarding this pang as disloyal, and
ft weakness, she will try to hide it, and so successfully

W/iAT SHALL WE DO WITH THK MOTHERS ? 210

such wounded sensrtivenp.?n ^f!" *^' V^^^^^^^on of

callyCored Vevin V' ^^S'^'"^^}^ claims systemati-

neither scruples nor romnrl T !t 'i*''''^"' ^^^ ^^^^
or thereafter^ kr-a„Twe tVflf .^^^^^^ficacion then

un'iel' U^bfrer 'ski? "| T'J^ ?°t""g "* her own
plainly elate in the Lftt J 1 ' '^^ ""'"'<' ^-"'d, so
wear Lr clolho, »t ,?. """y '"^"' °" enough to

does not occur to the mT™^', *""= ^'^-booteiy! It

parent preferred ?o t ^KTo thlT" «^ '^^ "'"' ''<''
upon her bv everv HoJl JiS ? }t° conviction pressed

nS longer id^eS,ttrt"Lte'?h"-'"'"^''^^^^^^
clothing is of different fsvtnT J Jt?"' """"y "■"'«-
She is satisfied with frlfk !.""'' f"*''"'' fr<"° hers.

weartwofbuttlrdsartwentvL^'^'^f ^^'^ r"'"*
l>«t. for their proiest. Z\T.^T':\tZTintirtr

' ^^^®® "naes as much as hers, and

Their

220

WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH THE MOTHEUS

are worn over stockings many degrees finei-, with certain
prettmesses of "clocking" and embroidery she never thinks
ot assuming, even when " dressed." This same "dressing "
IS with them a continual feast— with her a hebdomadal
luxury, bhe cannot bear to deny them " what other girls
nave, and thsir careless, happy eyes fail to trace any
connection between the "We will try to manage it,
aear, which answers their petitions, and her growing old-
tashionedness. They do not analyze her motive in offer-
ing to make over for herself the black silk of which Mary
IS tired to death," and to give the girl a robe of the la-
test and dullest tint dictated by artistic taste. Jenny's
last years street costume is frayed and shabby. More-
over, everybody knows the old thing." Mamma, " who
goes out so little" (naturally) proposes to take it off her
nands, giving a new one in exchange. A series of such
exchanges is not favourable to the development of "style"
in the elaer woman's attire, but lends freshness to that of
tne younger.

Mary and Jenny are bright, clever girls, ready with
wit and needle. They "go out" a great deal and must
look well. The house if not refurnished at their deb ut, is
gradually transformed by their agency until the only un-
sight y piece of furniture in it is the nominal mistress,
bhe looks out of place— is growing "poky," complain
tne juniors. As time passes she is apt to become less
lively in speech and expression, and they to wonder
petulantly at her backwardness in learning new customs.
Ihe very table is set differently from " her way " The
late dinner d la Russe, ladies' lunches, kettle-drums and
nigh teas are a surprise and a strain to her faculties. The
daughters, au }mi to every improvement upon obsolete
usages are intolerant of what they consider her obstin-
^% T-^^ . ® hesitates to adopt them. Facile youth
with difficulty receives the idea that novelty is oftenest
pain to age. ^ The sun, with the young, shines upon the
landscape beiore them. For her who gave them birth it

E MOTHERS ?

WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH THE MOTHERS ? 221

skies make common things sacred to her"^ °

i m not cross ! I'm diseoKruged ! " piped the little fel
low who had been whipped fo/persist^n'^^^fretti„r

of consequence. The nrocess nf rrr;«.r •= j ' F
somebodil into nobodie^°cS welSoTJe'rd'Z

creature, she too frequently evinces little^akrto aS-

schoolingthatembittrt^rt'^ttSstT^^^^^^
to be consulted, and she does not like to hp n«trn^^ a
especially by the children whose tS she^^tshedll
whose untidy tncks she chided-it seems but yesterday^
She IS already sufficiently conscious of her defi
ciencies. her ignorance of really valuable things without
being tormented by animadversions, implied ^; uttered

S'of'; fr'^'fT- '.^."P^ ''''^S to learn at "u;
leet of a thousand trivialities, momentotis to you but

flint-dust in weight and in irritating proDertieM fn^f,!

already used to the wider horizon of ^^0 h«, l ^

preciabie dividing line from eternX ^^ ^' ^^ ^P"

" O ye poor, have charity toward th^ nVK < "

Parson Dale in " My Novel." ' ^""^^^

t ; I

w
m

222 WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH THE MOTHERS ?

We mothers, enriched by the experience of vears

for"Xr' r' T' *^^^°"^^ the^lisci;Hne ofour
noii^rf % w"""^ y^'^ *° ^^ charitable to our slow-

us alone 'fn7 ^''r ""^ P°'^"^'^« ^"'^ P^^es. "Let

lost of rno T-"""" ^'P' '''^•^ ^""^^ •'" i« th« silent pro-
test of many a loving parent, set to lesson-learning when
she thinks school-days should be over ^

Ihen murmur Mary and Jenny in concert « if tho
case of the daughter be thus with the mother we are to
walk forever m the old worn-out path ?hat tils us as

rtt'hett%"elT "" Tu""''-. ^'^^' *^-' b-"-" o
our .esthetic zeal, our skill m domestic ai't decoration
the house beautiful of our dreams ^ " ^ecoration-

iht^''''i^\?^^^i^]' ^ '^^" ^*^^e somewhat to say upon
this head. Now I lay down but one. and what^seeC

now sUdsTas H^P^" ^°"f -""'"^"-l'^ '^-V-^
now stands, has been your mother's kingdom for more

years than you have lived in this changing world That
le^rSer thrift ^'^ and comfortable-^tha^t it"i .t J't
try n anot n InT *^^^/^'!^>"g ^^^r husband's indus-
hl r weZl InS r, ""^ ^'^'^"- "^^^ furnishment of
wal the wfv ?n 1 • ]"% ''' ^ ^'''^^"^ «^ ^«^- life- I'l^at

tTmes" /Yew l7^''' ^'"''•' ^'^^ ^^^^'^ "P in "old
Sf^f ■ f \ bedroom carpet was an excitino- inci-

dent ; fresh papering and painting an event • refSrnfsh

Sf-tL?'t"r" ?."'^^ ^^''^^ fe" twi^e in one
me time lo accomplish any one of these reauired lnn<r

nX"' tpTthe^'- ^f.fi^-^^^ that temTwatd'Z
mofhei- ^ individuality and history of the house-

whOe teXSTh^' ^'"' "«^'^'f ""*^^'' >^«"^' f^^^^er's roof,
wniie She lives they are secondary to hers.

bhould she choose to assert as much, legal and moral

stetu es would bear her out in it. She is* norilkcTto

'JrlielZ ^"'^ ^"-f lously at the suggestion, ^h^

rt i^ei lies m 3 oui aeliiyluiess or usurpation, not in her

MOTHERS ?

WHAT SHALL WE DO WITH THE MOTHERS ? 223

want of magnanimity ; in your forgetfulness of the truth
wi\^^'^^°.? "^^^ ^' crown-princesses, she ifoueen
da ms Wht^' r' ^"^r" "^''''^^'^ «f your hereS ;
LeSelv^floo' >^;eJ^^%*« y°"r petitions or dictaS
if vour own ^ sL ^n Y^^^ ^'" T" ^^'"^ ^"^0 reahns
earth ''''" ^^^' "^ ^^"g^^°™ but this on

One word of compassion, not of riirht " Mnmr^o » •

wm°;i„l°r''' «"■* p'*y'' f'"'' *''^''- t'-y if tws thought

Thlito^ fr.Sr'' ^"'y homelines. into secmiiness f„d
shinmg, jf, setting over against each lack of hers that
jtue or accomplishment or physical perfect"™ of v*u«
of which this lack is the price, you may not 'rowin

Lr t;r^ss; mSc?:-'"' ""■™" ^^y^

•ft

If:

CHAPTER XVII.

:■ i:

INDIAN SUMMER.

" ?>r""f^ nothin),' can bring back the liour
Of splendour in the gi-ass, of glory in the flower ;
We will grieve not ; rather Hnd '

htrenifth in what remains behind.
\ln-Z pri'nal nympathy
Which having been, must ever be •
In the soothing thoughts that spring
Out of human suffering.

In the faith that looks through death .
in years that bring the philosophic mind "

-Wordsworth, "Intimations 0/ ImmoriaHtyr

" The Love tliat Lived ! "

baok'nffi.i'^'^^i^T^T^ '^^' elsewhere than on the
back of the novel offered me over the counter as " some-
thing new and striking."

Close beside me sat a white-haired woman, whose hands
trembled slightly and continually in turning Xer a S

rerri^htlnf l! ^" i^b-T bi-^'Jg- Herh^usbandwasat
,rfr^^/i 1^ '?^'' ^^^"ghter-a fine, intelligent-looking
^\\ » » {^""^^P^^ twenty-fi ve-a little in the riar. " Pres?

af th Wk'^' "^''''V I^-iPh-^d, by further glauces,
as the back of one volume, then of another, came into

ViCvV,

i.„"k* '1'^\^ ^^ j"''^ ""^ mamma thinks !" pronounced the
husband clearly and slowly, stooping slightly that his

'^Tf .L ' nT"^"?^^^* ^^^^ ^^ intonation with words
If she would hketo have the set, and in this binding, we
will^rder them without looking further." ^

" ^y all means r responded the daughter cheerfully.

f iMmorlalitjf"

INDIAN SUMMER. 225

' It is!" I, said, with all, ny heart.

with me. TL.VhtT^^:T;^^^^^^ ^''^ry

hands yet held the sceptre. '^Mam ma ' at it " ''""^'"?
ten, was still sovereiom "/,, r,'*!^'"^"^, at threescore and

Ihis as It should be'"

on tt"'h?Jhry otaS^^^ ™^ "^ ^^- ^-Pd-^t

how to rei|n wielv S welf^ Tf ' ^"''" '^'^^"^^ «*"^b'
thers would prote t a "ainTf L r '''' •^' ^^'^^^ '^"^ ^o-
our day and lanT to"S , 'l^'^T^'^^ ^^^* obtains in
with gfeen timber we r^u f 7 ^^ll'^'^^^ovk of society
soned wood. Trdz^n netlr'^'^P'^^^'^^^^' °f «^^-
influ 3nce over our chXr^'n «?n ?' 1 T ^^"^^ ^«<^^"^ the
and adolescencrwe must stTrl ''"''^"» ^'^^'^ "^^^^^7
th.n the bald a:ssT tir of Tur nataTr'^'''^^^^^"^
lights in and over them ru^ ^f^al (and accidental)

elbrt after inteZttrgrolthTt th^I^ ^"

baby, must not comnlaintWi; ^ ^'''^^ ^^ her first
have outstripped heT 4^sdom^^ iT^uP ^""^ ^^^ ^^'^^
cally in the prime of l!?e' ""^"^^ ''^' ^^ «^^" P^si-

her sacrifices for their wllfarp H,. ^ ^^' \^' P^*^"^^« ^"^^
principle of frrflHf,,!^! weltare, tliey are bound by every

M d?ty atlXtlon^t^'r" '^'^ ^^°" her I'^specZ
her commands Nor sbt/ her wishes and obey

their own decadence ii^S ""'"^r ^'^ "°* ^^'^P^^^

'■m

Ih'

226

INDIAN SUMMER.

parent's obvious failure to adapt horsolf to tlio tone and
tenets of the fast-risin*,' gei.eration. 1 have said before
tliat it is liard to set one's self anew to con tasks when the
habit of stutly has l)een Ion<,' lost. I admit fully and freely
that it is not only toil but pain to attempt the resump-
tion. My heart has bled at the sight of such experiments
when tJie motlier, spurred to etlbrt by the desire to retain
her children's companionship, or to escape their contempt,
lias tried, at forty, at forty-five, at fifty years of age, to
make henself over ; to remould demeanour, speech, opinion,
even con.science, in conformity with the model set up by
them. Sometimes a decent counterfeit is the result. Wit-
ness Mrs. Holgate in Mrs. Whitney's rare series of charac-
ter-studies, "Hitherto."

" A woman who had begun a-sthetics rather late in life.
They sat, somehow, curiously on the substratum of homely
habit and unintrospective conanon -sense. She had 'settled
down.' Very much so, indeed. The settling had taken
place a long while ago, and could not easily be disturbed.
You could hardly expect new modes of thought or action
from her, or a new expression in her face, any more than
new ways of doing up her hair."

Yet we do not sympathize with Aunt Ildy's summing
up : " Jane Holgate is a good soul, but she is a hypo-
crite!"

We are mortified with the good soul when she never
can remember to say " article " instead of " piece," and
sincerely sorry, with no touch of contempt, that she makes
" ineffectual movements among her guests " at the conver-
sazione, and insists anxiously upon hearing what Grandon
Cope is saying when she catches the word, "jeons." As a
metaphysician she is a palpable failure ; as a transcenden-
talist, ridiculous. As a mother who clings, as for life and
happiness, to the relaxing fingers that have until now
been content to fasten upon her hand for support and
guidance, who shapes language and thought and belief
with as single an eye to their approval as she compounds

INDIAN SUMMER.

227

cake'-^fltV.""'";'- r' ^1^' "'-'ItingricluioHs of the lo.non-
thetic! '"" '"^'''-^'"^^"^•" tea, sho is heroic and pu-

a.s aTvnn ^^'tI^'T "^^r^ration hut I want Mrs. Hol^^ato

'^s a type. ho trouble with her, as with a much more

uinerous and e.ss-to-be-a.huired class, lies a j^reat 4ay

nffT -J'u'^x '"^ ?'' ^"^''"'^^ ".settlinjr down'- A man
at hfty. ,f he be tolerably robust in bo.ly, an.l if he lave
neither overwrought nor wasted his nervous forces, is in'
the full glory ot his maturity. His words carry weight
his decisions are pregnant with thought and experience'
He grows now as he coulJ not at thi.ty. evenly broadfv
steadily, needing forcing as little as lopping. His wffe-
theavei-age matron— acknowledges, sadlv nerhans hiif
without shame, that she is " too^l:l to le^arfi '' Thea
such an one, the other <lay, refuse to say " 2>.r-einptory ''

wfe "^V^'l^^^^l t'l^t the pronunciation was sui)ported
oy tne best lexicographers.

"1 can't worry my brains over new notions, my chiiU "
she averred plaintively. " I have said pe-rm/tory all
my life, and shall say it until I die "

Another, for the like excellent reason, will say "neu-

cause will drink tea from her saucer, disdains the use of
hand rt 'f^'t''^} " butter-plate set at her righ
hand at her daughter's table, and sickens family and
guests by putting her knife in her mouth ^

a.v ^CI''''^^''''^^}'''^^'''^ graver instances of the obstin-
acy these exemplify as worse than childish folly, as abso-

othe^s ""'w i ^^^^^S^'ll of the comfort and feelings of
i°n5 V ^ ' ^.r^ r "S^^ to " settle down " into selfish
induratedness that shall offend or hurt those we love

rhere are mothers-I wish I did not know so many of
whom this IS true !-who declare that they have no time
for reading much less for systematic study. One recur^
to mv mind wifh T^oinf.,1 j:~^i --* "^ ^ci^ura

— la •• — 1 painiai diaauctiiess : a woman who as
a girl, was a zealous belles-lettres student, a pleasing

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228

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INDIAN SUMMER.

musician, and eminent among her associates for her clear,
sound sense. She had been for twenty -five years the wife
of a clergyman. Their position and income are good ; her
health with that of her three children, is exceptionally
fine ; she is not overburdened with charitable and social
duties. Yet I have it from her own lips that she " does
not read one book a year."

Married women, who are mothers and housekeepers
have no leisure for literary pursuits," she laments.

She believes that she speaks the truth. I tell her of a
woman who bore eight children, and reared seven to
man s and woman's estate ; who, before sewing-machines
were invented, did the bulk of the family sewing with
her own hands— such exquisite needlework that the
daughters preserve their christening robes as treasures of
delicate stitching; who put up pickles, preserves, and
potted meats with zeal and skill Mrs. Rundle might have
envied ; a woman whom nobody ever called " blue-stock-
ing" or strong-minded, yet who for sixty years read
everything she could lay her hands upon, from her own
excellent library of Early English Classics down to " Mid-
dlemarch" and Matthew Arnold. History, biography
theology, fiction— all took their turn. A book lay ever
ready within her mending-basket. I have seen her darn
swiftly and beautifully while her eyes rested alternately
upon needle and open page. Knitting was a favourite
occupation, for she could read almost uninterruptedly.
But her best hours for study were while her babies fed
at, and fell asleep on, her bosom, " until," she would say
laughingly, " they became wise enough to pull the book
out of my hand."

My clergyman's wife listens in polite incredulity.
"She must have been an exceptional woman,"
comments calmly.

I am wearied to the extreme of impatient disgust at
hearing of " exceptional women " who " keep up their
mugic," and nctually find time to draw, read and think.

she

INDIAN SUMMER,

^29

What one woman does— unless she be a lusus ndturoi
and no generation can have hvo uniques— a thousand
others can do. If we would elevate our young people's
minds and aims, we must begin by raising our own The
help that comes fropi the down-stretched hand is better
sustained and safer than the " push " from below It is
our duty to read, to study, to observe, that the onward
rush ot thought and events may not sweep our children
away from us as we lie stranded, like the proverbial
weed upon Lethe's wharf. All our prating of the " good
old times," our tears over modern perversions, will not
restore the one nor alter the channel of the other And
while nurseries have windows, "mamma," though tied to
baby s cradle, need not be ignorant that the world moves.
1 he crying sin of American society is that it is " too
young, therefore crude. Conversation parties are huge
games of flirtation, or else stupid to boredom. Our .nrls
can flirt with more grace and safety, dance more airily
dress better, and look prettier than any other youncr'
women on this planet. As a rule they cannot tall
Ihey lack ballast and tone. Even the intelligent daugh-
ter, whose eager mind craves food, and whose stored
knowledge would be the riper and sweeter for such turn-
ing and tossing and winnowing as come from contact
with more steady judgments and calmer spirits, gets so
little ot this at home that she matures unevenly You
as her mother, wrong her more than you dream of now
—perhaps more than you will ever suspect— by sendino- her
to others for sympathy in the aspirations, the enthusi-
asms, the despairs, that belong to her sex and youth
lou sustained a real and personal loss in the moment
when she first discovered that her thought was beyond
your plane ; that her refinement of sensibility and hei^^ht
of aim were things you could not or did not care to ap-
preciate. ^

Our daughters ! It is a mystery beyond my under-
standing how we, as women, knowing for and of our-

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230

INDIAN SUMMER.

selves the unutterable secrets of longing, anguish, and
blessedness that enter into the least eventful life of the
least sentimental of us all, can err— I had almost written
" sin " — in habitually underestimating the vital import-
ance of mutual confidence between mother and girl. It
is not enough that we encourage our children to talk
freely to us, to confide to our safe and tender keeping
feelings and hopes they would blush to divulge to an-
other. We must prove ourselves worthy and able to give
counsel no less than sympathy ; must not have " settled
down " below the level of their requirements. We may
preach and write until tongue and pen fail us of " mo-
ther's " superior qualifications as a confidante over the
bosom friend of to-day, who may be the bosom serpent of
to-morrow. But while the girl on whose full soul is laid
the strong necessity of confession can add to the recital
poured into the greedy ear of her chosen intimate, " Mam-
ma can not enter into these emotions, you know, dear.
She is so much older than I that she has forgotten how
young people feel. Her range of ideas is naturally dif-
ferent from ours," the misplaced confidence will go on.

I need but touch upon this point for my penlio probe
many an old but unhealed sore. Who were the friends
of our girlhood ? To how many of these yet alive upon
the earth would we entrust the least weighty of our pre-
sent trials with assurance of comfort or sound advice ?
Of how many of the " secrets " made known to them by
tongue or letter can we think now without burning cheeks
and mortification of spirit ? It is a pity if our delicate-
minded, loving darlings may not profit in part by the ex-
perience we earned so dearly. It is not enough that we
sacrifice our self-esteem by recounting our early blunders
and reveal how shamefully we came to grief. The story
will neither seal your girl's lips to her '" dearest friend "
nor open her heart to you, unless, with far-reaching pre-
vision, you have kept the probability of this crisis in mind
and prepared her and yourself for it.

INDIAN SUMMER.

231

I fear wc arc making the same mistake in our'home
lite that some good Christian men and women are prone
to commit, and which some pastors of youthful flocks in-
culcate by precept and example. Our babies and infant-
schoo bands are trained to sing and say, "I am Jesus'
little lamb, " Jesus loves me, this I know," and " He bore
the cross for me," until a certain or rather a variable
period, known in formularies as the " accountable acre."
Then the wind that blew softly from " Beulah Land " and
lieautitul Zion veers to an alarming quarter, even to
the Mount that burned, and the children of wrath are ad-
monished to flee for their lives from the mouth of the pit
unmasked beneath their feet.

The truth being— in sad sincerity and reverence be it
spoken !— that it is the shepherds' fault if the Iambs are
allowed to wander from the Master's fold. They should
have been instructed to draw the nearer to Him, to lav
hold more confidently of His strength as years and dan-
gers multiply, and they grow into the sense of His worthi-
ness and their need.

Thus we mothers, who should never cease to be teach-
ers, and can never demit our office of guardians— we to
whose love the dear Father of us all condescends to liken
His own— should study with pious craftiness to prevent
the straying of our nurslings as they advance in age and
knowledge. If they learn more rapidly than we, as is but
natural, we have a reserve of garnered wisdom upon
which to draw, provided always that we have not become
like unto our babes in mental powers while tending them
We can apply to the novel theories and dazzling para^
doxea that fascinate them the test of judgment kept
strong and clear by continual exercise; can become and
remain the balance-wheels to their impetuosity. I pity crirls
who lose their mother by the time they are fairly grown
although there remains in her accustomed place one who'
wearing her sliape and name, is yet but the affectionate
nurse and housekeeper who, like Sir Joseph Porter, " means

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232

INDIAN SUMMER.

well, but don t know." In justice to "ouv daurmters,"
let me add that where I have known one mother sue
m vain for her rightful position as her child's nearest
and dearest friend, I have seen fifty girls cliiUed and re-
pelled by a want of congeniality of feeling and thought
utt-.r paucitj of sympathy with what most interests and
moves them.

For their sakes, if not for our own, to aver from them
virtual orphanhood and such life-wreck as may come by
gradual but sure sequence, from this bereavement, let us
add to our daily prayers p. titions for freshness of heart
and vigour of intellect, for immunity from formality of
belief and moral obstinacy.

One practical hint at this part of our talk, which may
be useful to the girl and consolatory to the mother.

Jietore the golden calm of Indian Summer, come the
long, wearying autumnal rains that beat the latest-bloom-
mg chrysanthemums into the earth and despoil the trees
ot their liveries of russet and purple. A like change of
li/eMh upon the woman, one that renews the memory
of the unrest, the mental pertubation and physical pains
ot the transition from childhood to girlhood. With some
the season is like the passage of the Valley of the Shadow
of JJeath The smouldering embers of hereditary fires,
kept under by the overling crust of a manufactured
constitution, break forth now, if ever. The pulmonary
weakness "cured by a Southern winter or sea voyage the
year after the first baby was born, slides a cold haSd up
to the lung tl a.t was "touched " then. The painless lump
in the breast-that, after the last child came, revived au
uneasy reco lection of a story that a forgotten grand-
mother died of the cancer-stirs into life and agony
Ihere is a predisposition to insanity in some branches of
tfie family the woman who has reached the second turn-
ing point remembers, try, though she does, to banish the
imagmation when she succumbs, against will and rpason
to causeless depression, and shivers^at nameless dreads '

INDIAN SUMMER.

Ill- daughters,"
ne mother sue
?.hild's nearest
cliilled and re-
j and thought,
: interests and

v^er from them
may come, by
vement, let us
hnoss of heart
I formality of

k, which may
mother,
oer, come the
latest-bloom-
ipoil the trees
ike change of
i the memory
)hysical pains
With some
f the Shadow
reditary fires,
nanufactured
e pulmonary
id voyage the
iold hand up
)ainless lump
e, revived an
)tten grand-
and agony,
) branches of
second tum-
o banish the
[ and rfia-<'<^n
iss dreads.

233

Especially do the forgotten physical iniquities of her
youth and middle-age, not recognised then as misde-
meanours, accumulate at this epoch into a mountain of
transgressions, darkening and chilling her existence. She
naa no time to take care of her physique while at school,
and indeed, would not have " molly-coddled " nerself it-
she had known how to guard against the risks of fleshly
aihnents. While the childrenweresmall,she never thought
ol her own health-what mother does ? Even after her
confinements she prided herself upon the "smartness"
that set her upon her feet and about her household tasks
Detore the month was up.

She is likely to have abundance of leisure for the reca-
pitulation of these and other fool-hardy feats. It is the
day of reckoning in the which every overdrawn account
every deficit m payment, every cunning attempt to gloze
over these by false entries or bold denial of the debt will
be dragged pitilessly to the light. Wheresoever has been
hidden the cai-cass of slain duty, there will the eagles of
discovery be gathered together. Even to her who has
Jaooured temperately and dealt justly with her natural
torces, the period is fraught with discomfort. The blood
surges to the head at the slightest provocation, making
the eyes dim, and the ears to ring and roar. Without any
provocation whatever, swift waves of heat flash and throb
trom feet to crown, and one lives for a gasping minute in
a turnace heated seven times hotter than an August noon
Ihe brain is not always to be depended upon for clear-
ness, nor the memory for fidelity ; constitutional head-
aches redouble m frequency and violence, and— crucial
trial of all—" Mother" cannot work as steadily a she is
accustomed to do without paying the penalty in a lav's
or week s illness. She who never had dyspepsia before
in her lite must now learn to regulate the quality of food
according to the dictates of a disturbed stomach and she
who has always "set such store by her sound sleep"
watches for the morning with strained eyes and tortured
nerves.

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234

INDIAN SUMMER,

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1 i

If ever you, her daughter, would repay, in some mea-
sure, the fostering care that has beerf yours from your
birth-cry, now is your opportunity. Watch over her ten-
derly, wait upon her patiently, and wait for her hopefully.
For — and here comes my promised gleam of consolation
— her real self will return when the climacteric has passed.
With some, and this often occurs with those who have
apprehended the approach of the " change" with dread
unspeakable, the passage is gentle and gradual, reminding
one of what Greatheart says of Mr. Fearing's experience
in the terrible Valley, in which " he was ready to die of
fear."

" But this I took very great notice of, that this valley
was as quiet when we went through it as ever I knew it
before or since. I suppose those enemies here had now
a special check from our Lord, and a command not to
meddle until Mr. Fearing had passed over it."

Once traversed in safety, it is beheld no more. The
pitfall and hobgoblins and lions coming after the pilgrim
" with a great padding pace," are left behind forever, and
the woman may be said to take out a new lease of exist-
ence.

Said a physician to me the other day : " When I want
good work done, I look about me for a woman over forty-
live years of age."

There begins, here, for " Mother " another and, in some
respects, a rounder and stronger life than she has yet
known. The renewal of the lease is upon advantageous
terms. She ought to be worth more to her family and to
the world than at any past date, bringing, as she may and
ought to do, the sheaves of Autumn in place of the perish-
able fruits of Summer.

My honest, homely plea is ended. Again, I pray you,
daughters, be charitable to us, mothers ! And may God
grant to each of us, my sisters, though eyes dim and
hair svhiten, the tioul-fountain of perpetual youthfuiness
that shall attract and refresh all tender, growing things,
shall feed, as well as beautify the lives we love !

CHAPTER XVIII.

HOUSEKEEPING AND HOME-MAKING.

-I'St^wKmanTanrkVI^^^^^^^^^ ^"^ '-"-^ble right

W than a drone can n^^'t^^-^^^l^ T^.rTcZZr' '''£,''.

brelksTnto '^n^lT'^ ^"'p'""^ '^' ^'''' «^ *he country
woman's worr«n?' ""^'^^'^ ^" *^" "«^«^ ^^^^^Jon of

w f\? 1 '''' 'T^ ^'"'^ between those who repre-
sent the employers, and the larger party who uphold the
rights of the employed; a multftude of foolish and some
good things being said on both sides ;-then mutters "

Nobody IS convinced and nobody hurt exceDtinnw
novices among workwomen who have Aot yet lefrned
that detonation is not reform, nor, of necessity, germane

Among things worthy' of record that grew out of such
a sham-hght about fourteen years since was a hr^pf
s rong reply penned by MadaL Demorest the celeb a '
ted modiste and fashionist of New York to ihl fr!T-
why so few women attain to compJ^L^V^ster; TZ^

"Because," wrote Madame (I quote from memorv)

not one in ten thousand experts to mnl-eThi-Tn-

trade the business of her life.^ It is ^oSin' wUth

she hopes to earn bread and clothes until she^Jts mar-

t'>

I r^

236

HOUS" :fiPING AND HOME-MAKING.

I f

ried. Being perpetually on the outlook for the fortunate
chance that is to relieve her from the necessity of paid
labour, she is content to learn just as little as will suffice
to keep her in her situation. The man, who knows that
he is fitting himself for a calling he will relinquish only
with existence, makes it a part of himself, and himself a
part of it."

Everybody professed to be satisfied with this solution,
which was indubitably true and altogether pertinent,
viewing the problem from Madame's standpoint. We
understood, or thought we did, why those of our young
women who are forced to maintain themselves are con-
tent with mediocrity in vocations that are but make-
shifts at the best, and why those of us for whom they
condescend to work while they are on their promotion
consent to accept the results of "journey " labour.

Madame Demorest ha,s, perhaps, accounted for the fact
that there are so few artistes in the United States. Who
will explain the fact, yet more patent, of the growing neo--
lect of practical housewifery on the part of young women
whose hopes and expectations are to possess and take care

of houses of their own at some — perchance very early

day ? That they are thus indifferent is no haphazard as-
sertion.

I do not forget that cookery is taking its place as a fine
art in our land, and is, therefore, patronised by our " best
circles." I have seen the artistically business-like blank
books open upon silken laps and rich fur muffs, diamond-
ed fingers flying over them in the eager effort to preserve
the directions of Signor Blot and Miss Parloa, during their
" fascinating " illustrated lectures. I enjoy— nobody
more — the fun of salad-clubs and cooking-circles, espe-
cially the "high teas" to which the intimate friends of
the fair cuisinieres are bidden to partake of dishes pre-
pared " exclusively " by themselves.

I recall one which was conducted upon strictly con-
scientious principles, that began with raw oysters and
wound up with confectioner's ices.

KING.

of the fortunate
ecessity of paid
e as will suffice
kvho knows that
relinquish only
, and himself a

th this solution,
ither pertinent,
andpoint. We
3 of our young
aselves are con-
are but make-
for whom they
heir promotion
' labour,
ted for the fact
d States. Who
le growing neg-
f young women
s and take care
;e very early —
haphazard as-

3 place as a fine
i by our " best
3 ess-like blank
luffs, diamond-
brt to preserve
la, during their
snjoy — nobody
^-circles, espe-
ate friends of
of dishes pre-

1 -strictly con-
w ovstei-s and

HOUSEKEEPING AND HOME-MAKING. . 237

did' ml w 1:: SiiS :r'fr^ '''^ ■ " ^^'-^ - -"-

i« «fn ' ,r ^ , "'^^ "Pon tJie incons stencv "Thnf

cooking is less hurtfurthan thf « Q Im '^f/ ^7'"^' ^'
citing than the whist-tablp tL "^™'^"' ^nd less ex-

bliud the watchful student of ^^^^^^ ^'"<' ^"''^''

to "our rrirls'" crpnprnlT tricks and mauuers "

I believe, fully and sorrowfullv fliof ir, +i.' •
petency lies part of the secrerof tL l. h , \^'^ '"'°""-
validism of so many of oufvoun^ -^ ^^"^'^^ ^""^ ^^■
mothers did their own housewoil n^f ^'"^f '.• ^"' ^•■^"^-
ironing. spinning, a^dwea^rn J w" ''^ "^\"^' f"^^""^'
livec^ and died in crenerllTJn^^^o ° l/l'^''^'','^"^'^"^^

and orthography. ^^TTnSrew?^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

try the craze of " womaji'i hi„\,Z „ ^ I" ""^ "<""»-

forte makers and ph ",Sa„t f w I r Th; ""'' P'T"
were girls thirty years a^o ln» J Ir ,?' ™"'™ ^^o

hold n^anageme^t'wrn fhey rre'^tS"""';,"' \°"^
as a whole seen to it fhnf fi -J "^^i^'ied. fhey have,

two instances from widely-setered ^^/""'TT' '""^^
action, and social positio7 'P'"™ "' *'">''Sht,

wealthy, and mul of tl Zon hmt ort/™" "°^
house and children devolved upoT,t""I;LtvS at
back upun my burdened girlhood althoiio-h T ^^^
n apprec.ate the injustice done ?o me MfdaJh
tiniot be prematurely careworn if I canTelp ?t*"

not
ters

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238

HOUSEKEEPING AND HOME-MAKINO.

In pursuance of this humane policy, she has fitted them
to become the accomplished wives of men not less afflu-
ent than their father, provided they can always secure the
services of housekeepers and an able corps of servants
to assist them in bearing the responsibility.

The second mother to whom I shall refer is as loving
and ruthful for her offspring as the rich man's wife, t.\-
though only the helpmeet of a small New England
farmer. She has two daughters — buxom damsels — fif-
teen and seventeen years old ; yet chancing to have busi-
ness at the farm a few summers since, I found her pale
and tremulous from a spell of fever, churning several
gallons of milk, pausing every few minutes to recover
breath and strength.

" Surely you are unfit for that ! " said I, compassion-
ately. " Can not your girls do it ? "

" I don't think such hard labour is good for growing
girls," she answered, the poor wan face softening as she
went on. " I have had to work so hard all my days that
I can't bear to set them at it."

" But if they marry," I suggested.

She sighed. '• Ah ! then they will be obleeged to come
to it. There's all the more reason, you see, ma'am, why
I should spare them while I can."

In the half day I spent with her I saw her knead the
bread and get the dinner ready, thanking, with gratitude
pitiable to behold, one daughter who picked up and
brought in a basket of chips, and the other who ungra-
graciously laid by a hat she was trimming for herself, to
set the table.

"I'm obleeged to call on the poor children to do so
many things that it's a wonder they don't get clean out of

gatience and run away from home," she observed in their
earing. " My sickness has been an awful cross to
them."

The girls' faces said that she had not overstated the
case.
The elder spoke out pertly ;

overstated the

HOUSEKEEPING AND SOME-MAKING. JSfl

ovl?a montf \''S ^^^\*°. ¥'^ ^° ^ «"«k of wood for
over a month. Indeed, she's been ailing pretty much all
the^tjme smce she had the fever firs^a yL'^gotl!

nC ^- *'" I *"!^ered, " she has done all the cookinxr
ctZ'"^' ^r^ ^"? ^^"^^ ^^ki«g. the family sew3'

thTs bv?iljn '-"P f^' "'^^'^^'^ °^ ^^^^"'•^ l«f<' from all

tms by taking in plain sewing and knitting I do noV

think a healtSy woman could lo more." ^* ""^
Ihe girl bridled at my tone.

£S:3^s:st^^-»--

accL\rnt^:t^rys'^^^^^^^ "^^^^^ - -- -^-^

mg to help mamma in every conceiva We way. I demote

^re of'mTn"^ ^'^ *" ^""1^^ the parlours W takTng
care of my own room, and often make cake and ie Iv
besides arranging the flowers and fruit whenever we

whrttSTh^i. ^V/'^'i' *^^°^ mother appreciate
What their children do for them. I know mine takes all

looSvinfn^'jt -""T ''^ discontent. Our daughters fit
tw! i= f ^''' I^T' '° ^'^^ ^o°^e«- What they do
du/'recomlZ'o? ?h ^T''- ""^ *^^^ ^^« defrauded i?
" helofn^^ntT » w^""^' '' ''^^ ^^^^ded to them for
order onh?n^ f • ^'^ °.°*^ ^^^^^^ *« ^^^^1 at this

f!.rJA^' °."'"' ^^'°g g^^d and willing service The

Ze^tothlfl?^^^^^}'^^''^''^ a share of domestic
cares to them as the work they must undertake for th^^r
a«//. Mice, bhuds us to their real good. —^^' ^«-^

240

HOUSEKEEPING AND HOME-MAKINO.

Where is the mother wlio has the moral courage to say
to the emancipated school-girl — " You begin now another
and important novitiate. Under my tu^telage you must
study housekeeping in all departments and details. In
one year's time you .should be competent to take ray
place if necessary. I expect and shall demand of you
a practical knowledge of baking, roasting, boiling, fry-
ing, broiling, as well as of mixing. It is not enough for
you to understand the art of preparing ' fancy ' sweets.
You must be versed in the mysteries of soups, gravies
and enMea. Moreover you must learn how to market
wisely, and to accommodate expenditures to means. All
this and much more of the st me sort of housewifery will
be imperatively needed should you marry. If you re-
main single it will be of incalculable service to you and
a wholesome exercise of mind and body."

Yet this is plain common sense, and the sagacity of
pure, disinterested affection. We are cowardly, false to
ourselves that we do not put it in practice, — false to
our trust, and cruel to our darlings in hardening our
hands and toughening our muscles in order to keep theirs
soft and flaccid.

It is almost inevitable that our young married women
should break down under the sudden weight of care and
and hearts are wrung to anguish. The overtaxed spirit
labour. Tempers are frayed at tie edges, spines ache
joins in the protest <^f the feeble flesh against the strain
and the torture.

At whose door lies the fault ?

In many instances, mother and daughter may justly
divide it. One errs after serious and unselfish calculation
of the weight of two evils. She can force her child into
a delightless routine of labour ; be stung and stabbed by
the sight of her reluctant performance of detested imposi-
tions and the hearing of her mutinous murmurs over the
squandering of hp.r precious tiir-p on what servants are
bound to perform. Or, she can let her bonny nestling

HOUSEKEEPING AND HOME-MAKINO. 241

thing. Else, the afSd t ' l7' ""''"S eost no-
menf and higher Sli" a faiSf ""' " P~' '''™'-

wif/„terbe\rj.'J.'^,;' ii; --SYo^r^^

dency of another horn.- than hi^ an .ft^K'f- 1 ">": ?"■"''■
tiorw have much womlVf tT tor,— his representa-

To descenJ to particulars : German h^JJ^o j u

houS.oixsxr :c;" k: t „*ntS

242

HOUSEKEEPING AND HOME-MAKING.

joy in the knowledge that she is helping, if only so much
as by the lifting of a finger, to ease the weight her mother
has carried, unaided, all these years.

The saddest story written in this country and century
is in a book from which I have already drawn one or two
extracts. " The Story of Avis " leaves the reader with an
uncured, — perhaps an incurable heart-ache. It appears
ungracious to handle professionally.as befits a housewifely
matron, heart-fibres so tense and sore as are those of the
woman-artist who is the heroine. It seems inhuman, too,
after the author's plea : — ^

" Women upon whom domestic details sit with a natu-
ral, or even an acquired grace, will need to cultivate their
sympathies with this young recoilicg creature."

In spite of our sober judgment and disapproval of the
fallacies of " Avis's " reasoning, our sympathies with her
grow fast and warm without cultivation, when we read
her life-long protest against these — to her — abhorrent
" details."

"I hate to make my bed; and I hate, hate to sew
chemises ; and I hate, hate, hate to go cooking around
the kitchen. It makes a crawling down my back to sew.
But the crawling comes from hating ; the more I hate,
tl 8 more I crawl. And mamma never cooked about the
kitchen. I think that is a servant's work. I'm very
ugly to Aunt Chloe sometimes, Papa. On the whole,
Papa," added the child gravely, " I have so many sorrows
in this world that I don't care to live ! "

Almost twenty yaars later, won, as we are made to
comprehend, against her will and conscience, since she is
wedded to Art, we see the betrothed Avis : —

" Across her picture or her poem, looking up a little
blindly, she had listened to the household chatter of
women with a kind of gentle indifference, such as one
feels about the habits of the Feejeeans. Unbleached
cotton, like X in the algebra, represented an unknown
quantity of oppressive, but extremely distant facts. How

HOUSEKEEPINa AND HOME-MAKINQ.

243

an unknown
t facts. How

had she brought herself into a world where the fringe
opiSonsr "^"^^ ^""''"'^ "" ^^^J^*'*^ ^eq^i^ing fixld
Th^ author of « The Silent Partner," and « Hedged In "
could not, consistently with the depths of true, helpful
womanliness in her own nature, and her appreciation of
the dignity and worth of common things and common
lives do otherwise than paint Avis as an abnormal
creation,-a stray bird that had lost herself in a foreign
and uncongenial clime. As a child she is to be pitild
more than loved. Only the mother who died while she
was an infant in years, understood her, even then. The
pretty mother who was "a thin sweet vision, like a
fading sketch to the young girl's heart." when "she re-
<^o .1?^ 1?''''^''^ distinctness" that she had been
snatched, kissed and cried over with a gush of inco-
uesSon — ^""^ scalding tears," after putting the

" J?id you never want to run away after you had
married Papa ? Did you never care about the theatre

The wife (she « had beyond doubt, the histrionic gift "
-so 6aid her grave husband) sobbed over the baby who
had but this "glimpse into her mother's heart"— "Oh
little woman! Mother's little woman, little woman f'
Avis s unrest and her genius were inherited

As a girl, we wonder at Coy's fondness for one whose
affections, with heart and ambitions, are boui^d up in her

art A wife she ought never to have been at all, and
maternal devotion is bom slowly out of throes of as
deadly anguish as those that brought her children into a
home where they were not wanted. Her natural incli-
nation and her subsequent growth are all on one side,
bhe suffers from this excrescent development as from any
other deformity. It is not more fair to accept her as a
representative woman than to take as the typical Amer-
ican student, a young collegian of whom I have lately

244

HOUSEKEEPING AND HOME-MAKING.

heard ;— a semi-idiot upon most subjects and utterlv de-
ficient in common sense. He can not do an example in
simple Addition or Subtraction ; in History he is a dunce
and m Geography would bepuzzled if asked to define the
ditterence between a continent and an isthmus. But he
a-^quires languages as by intuition, and is the lingual
prodigy of his university, writing and speaking Latin
Greek, German and Spanish with equal facility

Still another man is a walking Encyclop£edia of his-
torical and political lore. He can give the date and sub-
stance of not only every notable debate in the American
Congress since the establishment of our independent
government but of every Parliamentary battle that has
interested the English people for the last hundred years.
Burke, Chatham, i<ox, North and Canning are as real in
their personality to hini as Bright and Gladstone. But
this phenomenal memory takes hold of nothing beyond
historical and parliamentary detail. For all he knows of
general literature, and of the practical concerns of life he
might be an animated copy of the Congressional Qlohe
bound m whole calf.

Few men aie great, even in one direction,— and fewer
wonaen. This small number of both sexes may plan the
work of the world. It is carried into successful opera-

°?^''''ui^«? ^"^ '•^^ ^y P^^P^^ ^^ evenly-balanced minds
and healthful energies. Your one-ideaed man is as truly
diseased in perception and in judgment as is the woman
vho rides her hobby of art, literature, social, religious, or
political reform rough-shod over the wreck of domestic
comfort and happiness. She who neglects to comb her
hair and darn her children's socks while she is painting
for posienty, or accepts an invitation to address a Wo-
man s Suffrage Convention that calls her a hundred miles
away from home when her baby lies ill with croup, would
be as selfish in devotion to her specialty had her choice
liglited on Kensington embroidery or preserves. I was
so unfortunate as to talk with a distressed mother who

HOUSEKEEPING AND BOME-MAKING. 245

could not see her way clear to go to her eldest son a^nnrr

" Whl ^°^ !t^' ^'^?°^ ^^*^ ^'« last coherent word

Being of a strictly domesfetumfshe Ltd thrrP'"-
t,o„^sl,e^.erited by .inglene. oflevXnt 'AV^t

Let us be fair 'r '.^dgment and in verdiVf Wh;^^

rrcVnSs' /^^-r.^rtrstr:'^^^^^^^

get the measure of obloquy due to him who fotel iffl"

children, and his own physical needs in wareKe offio"'

or ateher. His neglect of assumed and slcred S,S

e.s upon the surface of home and sociej th^ wou^^^^^^^^

The perfect intellect in either sex is many-sided round

our home circle with such rlplir^^+Ji • x } ^ ^^^^ ^^

The author is Charles Darwin, LLD FRS

«.» the hon^ely ceremonies of cooker^-obTecisto Ihe

246

HOUSEKEEPING AND HOME-MAKING.

f ; f

troublesome details which are soon comprehended and
put into practice by the half-witted Colt or the Scandi-
navian who can not speak a word of the language of her
adopted land. The intellect that recoils from the acqui-
sition of the simple principles of mixing, baking and
boiling, because they disturb the calm balance of thought,
must rest upon a very slender pivot. The apprenticeship
to unfam liar and not agreeable work that makes college
Jane " crawl," does not rub into her nerves more roughly
than the alphabet galls the dull-mind^^d scullion thumb-
ing her " First Reader " every night at the kitchen-table.
She has been twitted, with her ignorance — " a gurrl grown
and not able to read an' spell ! " Literature and all per-
taining to letters are quite out of her line. She will
probably not read one book a year after preparing herself
for the work; but spurred by a single incentive, she
drudges on stubbornly,

A servant of my own once tagged me to " tache her
to write." Her betrothed had told her, with the refined
gallantry of his class, that he was " fair ashamed of her
because she couldn't so much as read a love-letter, but
must tp,ke it to tho misthress to know what was in it."
She had never been to school since her tenth year, and
could hardly make out the sense of a printed page, but
in three months' time she penned, without my assistance,
a note to her absent lover :

" Dear Mike,— This is to tel you I am wel and hopin
you are enjyin the same blesin thank god. I have lerned
how to Wright an also how to reade wrighting. now
send on yure leters.

" no moore at present from yure lovin

" Mary O'Reilly."

She taught me many and more valuable lessons thjto
she had from me as she sat each night under the shaded
nursery lamp, her coarse stiff fingers cramped upon the

HOUSEKEEPING AND EOME-MAKINQ.

247

2- O'Reilly."

nped upon the

pen-bairel, and made straight lines, pot-hooks, and hang-
ers, until the perspiration broke through the nores of her
red forehead,

"D'ye think I'll ever be m author, ma'am ?" she would
ask anxiously sometimes, in submitting the exercise to
my inspection.

" Yes, Mary," I always answered, with no disposition
to amusement at her blunder.

Referring once more to " Avis," we read :—
The usual little feminine bustle of sewing he (Ostran-
der) missed without regi jt. Women fretted him with
their eternal nervous stitch, stitching, and fathomless
researches into the nature of tatting and crochet. He
rather admired his wife for sharing so fully his objection
to them. Avis was that rare woman who had never em-
broidered a tidy."

Again, " It was not much perhaps to set herself now to
conquer this little occasion ; not much to descend frX)m
the sphinx to the drain-pipe ai one fell swoop ; not much
to watch the potatoes while Julja went to market ; to
answer the door-bell whi^e the jelly was straining ; to
dress for dinner after her guests were in the parlour; to
resolve to engage a table-girl to-morrow because Julia
tripped with the gravy ; to sit woiidering how the iron-
ing was to get done, while her husband talked of Greek
sculpture— to bring creation out of chaos, law out of dis-
order, and a clear head out of wasted nerves. Life is
composed of such little Strains ; and the artistic tem-
perament is only more sensitive but can never hope, to
escape them. It was not much ; but let us not forget
that it IS under the friction of such atoms that women
far simpler, and so for that yoke far stronger than Avis,
have yielded their lives as a burden too heavy to bo
borne."

The summary is painfully realistic. Each of us who
has kept houiie for a single year subscribes groanir^'ly to
the a<}curacy of the sketch. The question raised by my

*-•"

Jj3 - J

! !

248

HOUSEKEEPING AND HOME-MAKING.

t hi

IhTL^^ supported by experience is. whether even to
the artistic temperament brier-scratches are evei £tal
injuries. Annoyances they are these atnmin TfLf i
and points that bury then/elves in tender ^^^^
the smart is new the sufferer is prone to crv oi,? f h«f i.
senses are deserting her ; but whL?he prickles a e wit"
drawn, brave spirits rise superior to temporan^ ir^Lt on'

hurdrTdIvs "in ^"''•"^' '^^ "^"^°^' - t^p" dlwo
f^Tl^ * ^ '"^ copying a carrot that hangs twentv

Jhe mft" ^7.«°i^tf gingerly will feel the peZZt
f^AJlZ^^:^2:'-"^ °' the stou/boot that
You may pass a long, useful, and contented life with
out learning how to embroider a tidy. IT iSerican
homes now are-and there is faint prospect of recon
struction of our domestic system-no A^riLn woman
however exalted or assured her social rtnkoZZZZ
may be her accomplishments, can afford to remlin Z
rant of practical housewiferv This i^ « l,Z '!S I
exception. Disregard of it^s un^ el5 setsr' A?

H^aTbri^n'iLdfT ^^ -P-fron.how:verwor%
u may be m itself, becomes a fault when it ignores '^e
claims of others upon time and consideration^ It Ts Jt
3tads1o^tr ""^ "'^ '^^^ ^^"^ ^^^ "'-^l' Th
oXts Cgth ' " '^^^ ' '''"^^'' °^"^^^ '^i*^^ ^l^rough-

is tortdve' * Tht1°'T^^ ^' ^"""^^^^^' *° ^^°^-^" ^^is
18 ro receiw. Ihis is Happiness. To give of what vm,

have and are-of j^o^r.^f-that othefs may iTe beS
and happier— this is Blessedness. ^

By a beautiful provision of Nature, self-denial and

work offered in +his sni^t -iti-I '.-t-^v- "^^ «^«"Jai ana

-±- -U.S s^!,.ii; ana lor thia purpose ennobje

E-MAKINQ.

is, whether even to
iches are ever fatal
ise atomic particles
3nder skins. While
to cry out that her
e prickles are with-
emporary irritation,
agness to spend two
that hangs twenty
ought to have been

i, but so has every

bation. They who

feel the pebbles in

the stout boot that

)ntented life with-
ly. As American
prospect of recon-

> American woman
rank, or whatever
•d to remain igno-
is a rule without

> and selfish. Ab-
n, however worthy
len it ignores '^e
^ration. It is not
ends noble. The
3s the broad bene-
Idy ditch through-

to grow— all this
»ive of what you
rs may be better

B, self-denial and
purpose ennoble

HOUSEKEEPINO AND HOME-MAKING. 249

ihis'nl^L^f — ^'^'f ^°? ^°*'^^''*- The antithesis 6i
this proposition is no less true ; to wit, that the pursuit

all besides, especially when the thing is c?veted because

tj^ZT""" '^'^^'^^ *^°'^*,"^'^^'' *° <^"r «^ enjoyment
chamcC ^^'' eventually harden and narrow the

IpJfr a- ^"^ Tfi^^""* housekeeper k in itself one of the

ThllTT, ""V'^^ *^i^ ZT^"" ^^ ^""^^^'^ ^"d refinement.
^rlZ7 V^, ^«^^^md by means of an intelligent com-
fi?" ? of It, and just personal attention to "domestic
details, should be a study and a purpose.

^iil

««<d

^1^

f r

l^/;t

^^.msassi*

CHAPrER XIX.

DRESS.

^ "Katherine. I'll hare no bigger ! This doth fit the time,
And gentlewomen wear such caps as these.
V ■ ; • • • .

1 never saw a better-fashioned gown,

More quaint, more pleasing, more commendable,

— " Taming of the Shrew. "

A STATISTICIAN, curious in such matters, has laid be-
fore me a computation to the effect that one-third of the
time of the working-force of the average American house-
hold IS employed in making clean the clothes soiled during
the other two-thirds. Furthermore, that at least one-third
ot the quantity remaining after this subtraction, is con-
sumed in buying, making, and remodelling the garments
designed to cover these perishable frames of ours.

"Gallantry forbids me to hint," comments my philo-
sophical friend, " how many immortal beings are, by this
order of affairs, converted into galvanized dummies for
the display of ' clothes.' Much less would I dare coniec-
ture how many women become, through such agencies as
Ihave descnbed, variegated husks, gilded swathes enclos-
ing shrivelled kernels and dusty hollowness."

All this catches the fancy of cynic and philosopher (I
do not use the terms in this connection as interchange-
able). Men are so used to declaiming against feminme
methods of doi g work, and feminine fancies, that they
recognise the familiar jareron. accept it nnd t>rss it on
unchallenged and unchanged. ^ '

DRESS.

251

Shaking our judgment free from plausible platitudes
let us consider one or two self-evident propositions.

We must— being in a state of "artificial civilization'
—wear clothes. Clothes must be clean, whole, decent,
and suited in quality and make to the wearer. In the
last clause we descry Prince Ahmed's pavilion. The
millet-seed, when cracked, reveals the countless involu-
tions of a canopy which unfurls to cover a miffhtv
army. ® ^

What is "suitable?"

While the question seems to be clogged with peculiar
complications in our democratic country, those who have
travelled afar can testify that neither the peasant's garb,
usually so picturesque, often so uncomfortable and sense-
less, nor conventual robes, rid the women who wear them
from the pleasing anxieties that roll up into a burden of
care with those who exalt "Wherewithal shall we be
cloUied ? "into the dignity of a Profession. The Quaker
maiden, with face modest and fresh as an English daisy
bestows as much thought upon the texture and shade of
the dove-coloured gown and close bonnet as does Miss
McFhmsey upon the gorgeous costume to be ruined in
one night's whirl at a " crush " ball. In fact, I doubt if
careful examination into the circumstances and mental
exercises of the two women would not reveal that she
who clothes herself and family neatly, but with pains-
taking economy, making "auld claithes gar amaist as
well as new," expends more time and pains upon ways,
means, and effects in dress than does she whose " varie-
gated husk " is putative evidence of " dusty hollowness."
Frown as the utilitarian and ascetic may upon the
pretty trifling, the truth can not be set aside that dress
has been a fine-art throughout the ages that have
groaned themselves away into Eternity Past, since Eve
crouched among the bushes of Eden, hurriedly sewed up
the seams of her fig-leaf apron.

262

DRESS.

; , . if

\h.\

rJ;i

*!,"• .-^^'v ^^^ *^^ ^^"""^ ^^" *a^^e away the bravery of
their tinkling ornaments about their feet, and their cauls
and their round tires like tli. moon; the chains, and the
bracelets and the mufoers, the bonnets, and the orna-
ments of the legs, and the head-bands, and the tablets,
and the earrings, the rings, and the nose-jewels, the
changeable suits of apparel, and the mantles, and the

n^nS" '/I'u u^ f ^"Ping-pins. the glasses, and the fine
linen, and the hoods and the vails "

«,3! w T""^^ ^y *^^ ^"^ catalogue to a shrewd sur-
mise that the seer may have copied it from the adver-
tising column of the "Jerusalem JoiLvnal dea Modes," or
interviewed a court milliner.

r,Z^l'^'''•^'^ J^^ '^°°'^'' ^'^ ^^**^^^ ^nd »nore sensible
now than m the generation when the fisherman Apostle
—himself a married man, with a mother-in-law resident
under his roof-recommends the ornament of a meek and
quiet spirit to wives, as preferable to "plaiting the hair
and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel "

An unprejudiced child, in reading a passage that has
been quoted mto shreds, must perceive that Peter does
not prescribe this spiritual adornment as the bodily
covering or prohibit the " putting on of apparel." We
have outgrown the idea that sin per se lurks in furs
Jaces, velvets, or even diamonds. The Wesleyan siste^
who, being in conscience bound to draw the line of de-
marcation between church and world somewhere, drew
It at feathers, wearing flowers instead in her Sunday
bonnet, would be laughed at now in her own denomina-
tion. Every such distinction is arbitrary, and the con-
deuination of recusants which is based upon it is un-
chnstian and irrational. It is such fierce elevation of
non-essentials mto test-questions of inward graces that
has broiight scandal upon the professon^ and teachers of
a i^aith which is holy, harmless, and undefiled.

DRESS.

1.^3

ist the wanton

Fi^ Arf T fl in cultivating .. just taste for this
Fine Art A study of bocomingness, of harmony of
!nH"f^' ^\d.,<rOlours-a knowledge of the prevailing modes
and the ability to adapt tho.e to the wishes and mea^
of wearers-are as reasonable, in their way, as the endea^
vour to be so far acquainted with the general prindples
of music and painting as to be competent to diXn
between the good and bad of each art. Because a worthy
thing IS abused there is no need of casting wholesale
opprobrium upon it Because a long-haired cockney has
nursed his natural liking for music fnto a tumorous out!
^ff ""i/w ^.b^o^bs every other intellectual sense and
offends the taste of his nei^^hbours, am I to eschew Men
delssohn and shudder at Wagner ? If my acquaintance
over the way, in her ambition to become the first woman!
artist m America, lets her house go unswept, her youngest
born tumble about the front yard clad in a si/4 brief
garment and his predecessors in age roam thelown as

tTi n?'. " f"S '^f ^ ?°^ '""^^^y "P°^ ^^Phael and doub
the piety of Fra Angelico ?

It would be fatuous to dispute the statement that
thousands of women in Christian lands yearly sacrifice
virtue and their hopes of heaven to a mad pas bn for
dress and ornament ; or that tens of thousands starve
their minds by ultra-devotion to that which treats of
the seemly covering of the corporeal part. For such
devotees sane people have the same measure of contemo-

ThT. ^llV^^' '\7 ^''^ ^'' S^^^^°°« ^^d drunkards.
The all things richly to enjoy " of Divine gift and per-

mission have been perverted into licentiousness. There
IS a lust for dress which falls short of downright best^!
ahty only by bemg in itself trivial and mean. It is the
infatuation of small minds, and is, almost unexception!
ally, the external sign of excessive vanity and a limited
range of ideas The capital /that symbolizes personal-
ity, and should, in width, hardly eAc^M a filament "
gossamer, is stretched into a cloak for the envelopment of

254

DRESS.

tho whole bcingr. Over the upper edge the wearer sees
the outer world by plinipses.

-What /shall wear' is, in the cireumstances, a con-
Hideration of gigantic interest. That so few others care
what the result of the lucubrations may be, or note the
ettect that has drawn off the shallow ])ool of thought
to the muddy ooze of the bottom, is so seldom suspected
by the egotheist that she hardly needs our pity.

This is one extreme of the aie described by ti. • pendu-
lum, as the other is personal neglect and slo\ . nliness.
ISO woman—or man either, for that matter— can afford to
be absolutely inditterent to dress. The obligation laid
upon our sex to make home by seeing to it that food is
weil-cooked and attractively served, and rooms clean,
comtortuble and pretty, extends to neatness of person and
such attention to attire as shall not only avoid oflendin--
the eye, but please it and gratify just taste. "

This may be denominated the /Esthetic Morality of
JJress. 1 earnestly commend the consideration of 'it to
those wives and daughters who imagine— if we are to
judge by their practice— that working-clothes must
needs be slatternly ; the women who make a market for
the cheap calico wrappers trimmed with tawdry strips of
more gayly-coloured chintz, that liap against the door-
posts ot low-priced stores. They are the class who sit
down CO larless to breakfast, their hair in crimping-pins,
their feet in ragged gaiters, or slippers down at the heel.
\iru n r"" ^ '^'''°^" *° ^^«P^ct herself in such a garb.
Whether she suspects it or not it is yet more difficult
tor her husband or father to respect her. However busy
a man he may be, he would rather wait ten minutes
longer tor his morning meal when his wife or daughter
IS the cook, in order that she may slip on a decent dress,
witha hne of white at the throat— that indispensable
jnsignia of ladyhood.

" The absence of a collar will impart a cast of vulf^nr-
ity to the finest face," wrote Miss Leslie in the &st
quarter oi this century.

DBESS.

the wearer sees

istances, a con-
few others care
be, or note the
)ool of tliought
Idem suspected

hy til" pendu-
id slo\<;nlines.s.
r — can afibrd to
obligation laid
it that food is
1 rooms clean,
s of person and
avoid offending
e.

ic Morality of
^ration of it to
—if we are to
[-clothes must
;e a market for
iwdry strips of
linst the door-
class who sit
crimping-pins,
vn at the heel,
in such a garb,
more difficult
However busy
it ten minutes
Fe or daughter
a decent dress,
i indispensable

cast of vul^ar-
ie in the first

265

It is a rule that holds good in this, the last.

Ihero IS a mixture of parsimony and ostentation in

lent courtesy, even religion'^whert t m 7w; 1 show fn"

the state couch in the guestSb'e'tift flrLt""!:
the^r^^ht to 300 .0. of T^^^J^ ^J^J^

It is not practicable to lay down any general dir^P
tions. much less specific rules, for the guTdS of ihZ
who would dress tastefully "if thev onlv w! v ^

uneLTl ^-^r-P^t^« -VaYuiSe\^^l^-
June a snare to such as have not the root of the m^lt

• r tTrec^orfftCf at^e^oTtZ' ?7 F 4^ '-
struetK. and action whifh rSstit sl^^^f ^hVut

i.^I^'^T ^""i ^^""^ "^^^^^^ ^^ abundance and irrefraaablA
taste, do not essay strikinf? costum^^ a T ^f

" leonine " yellow, crossed b^a hly-whTte Dlum. T'^"'

wSL%^:So-tT:^i-?5{S^:

256

DBESS.

or sober colours, and shun the, to some people, easily be-
setting sin of gaudy trimmings. Wear what you will in
the way of light and fanciful raiment in-doors for after-
noons and evenings, if a florid taste craves expression. In
public places they are a solecism.

_ Study consistency of attire everywhere and always. A
silk cloak and a common stuff dress are, in Mr. Weller's
phrase, " unekal." When you air your second-best suit
abroad, let the second-best bonnet keep it in countenance.
A dress hat and a cheap gown remind one versed in the
etiquette of apparel of a cactus in full bloom above the
ungainly stem and abortive leafage.

Hygienic reformers themselves being judges, there has
never been a costume — national, provincial, or individual
— which met the requisitions of health and good sense.
Eve's fig-leaves had the merit of simplicity, economy, and
comfort in the climate of Paradise. Her daughters have
seldom compassed so much with one hundred times the
labour. The practical mind has little pleasure in fighting
unreformable abuses. It is, moreover, possible that this
question of mdiiern apparelling is a red rag which has
sent the blood in blinding surges to the assailants' heads.
There is a tremendous weight of evidence in support of
the assertion that women dress more comfortably and
more in conformity to the laws of decency and heialth
now than did their mothers, grandmothers, and very -far
back-indeed ancestresses. We have Isaiah and ancient
sculpture in corroborative evidence of this audacious as-
sertion.

We wear flannel next the skin ; plenty of loose, warm
undergarments in winter, thick shoes and fur coats, few
skirts, and those short enough to allow us to walk with
ease, and educated women no longer lace tightly.

Dr. Thomas, in his elaborate work " On the Diseases of
Women," wites : —

" Chapter upon chapter has been written against tight
lacing in so vehement a style that the reader, if she did

DRESS.

257

not reflect, might suppose that "to this abuse couLd be
traced the whole catalogue of feminine ills. If perchance
however, she inspected the unyielding stays which once
compressed the sturdy form of Alice Bradford, knd which
are now preserved in Pilgrim Hall in Plymouth, she would
at once see that the mdictment was not a valid one • and
similar objections might be raised against all the other
causes which I have advanced, viewed as isolated in-
stances.

^ Tight-lacing makes one intensely uncomfortable to be-
gin with, and long persistence in the foolish practice red-
dens the nose irremediably, and as certainly as tight shoes
produce- sick headache. Volumes of physiological argu-
ment would not abolish the fashion of wasp-like waists
as speedilv and effectually as the announcement made
above. The outraged blood, forced out of its legitimate
channel, retreats vengefuUy to a point where its settle-
ment must ever remain a source of keenest mortification.
1 have heard of a woman who would have been beautiful

r.l!?^i *^ T''^' ^?^' i" desperation, applied leeches
repeatedly to the inside of the nostrils to abate the nui-

S\ ^^®/^Pf."«i6n<^ was unsuccessful ; the sullen red
held the fort obstinately. Nor h&ve I ever known a case
where lungg and heart were subjected to long-continued
compression, in which in due time the violence done to
the vitals was not proclaimed by a "crimson-tipped"
nose a^ fiery as a dram-drinker's-that is, unless the au-
thor of ^ the deed died of <;onsumption, apoplexy, or angina
pec^ons before the height of bfoom wis perfected.

Ihe fact of the desuetude of the suicidal custom,— to the
unborn offspring of the offenders often a murderous one

"^^P^'Tu'^-^^^-"''"''',^^^*^^^ «^g"«- Where fifty women
padded their buste thirty years ago, perhaps on^ excep-
tionally flat-breasted one does now. Most of our ffirls
need no such appliance, being broad of shoulder and deep
ot chest, and our elderly matrons show a growing propen-
sity to copy their English sisters in a gain of plumpness

m
hi

''I: J

258

DRES3.

With advancing years. To be thin is no longer the acme
01 teminme desire, especially when a kindly coating of
flesh 18 needed to fill out sinking cheeks and defacin.^
wrinkles. *

The young girl should be fitted with some one of the
numerous excellent bodices or corsets now in vogue by
the time she is thirteen or fourteen. These, we may re-
mark, are totally unlike Alice Bradford's "unyieldincr
stays or those with which our own mothers girt them
abort,— machines as straight and well-nigh as stiff as tree-
boxes. They were drawn as tightly about the soft upper
parts of the abdomen as silken and hempen strings could
pull them. Many had not the strength to lace their cor-
sets properly. I have a vivid recollection of standing
by, an open-eyed and copamiserating witness of the mys-
teries of the dressing-room, when as a child I was per-
mitted to see grown-up young lady visitors prepare for
dinner or dance. Each, in turn, commanded the services
ot a stout servmg-maid who corded her with a power of
muscle that would have insured a Saratoga trunk a^^ainst
the most energetic baggage-smasher. Upon ordinary oc-
casions the lady, if she were of an independent turn, laced
Herselt up, tussling valiently to insure her bonda^re A
common custom was to cast a loop of the laco about the
bedpost as a convenient belaying-pin, and strain upon
this With the whole weight of body and muscle until the
creaking construction of buckram and bone closely banded
the waist as in a vise. The breasts were forced up to the
collar-bone; the ribs gradually compressed until they
overlapped one another. Women fainted in c ^owded as-
semblies then, for want of breath, which would neiver
have had room to i e-enter the collapsed lungs had not the
instant expedient in all cases been to cut the corset-
strings. Bo arding-school girls often slept without loosen-
ing the lacings that would require half-an-hour's work in
the morning to make fast again. We of this creneration
are paying, m life-blood and tearjj, for this unholy work

DRESS.

259

Our girl's corset is pliable and carefully-adjusfci^d to
the figure. _ It is the mother's fault if the child pur-
chases a "nineteen inch," when she should wear nothing
smaller than « twenty-two." Unless this blunder il
made^ it is not possible for such a corset as, for example

tiame. The bips are protected, ?s is the abdomen, by
their covering, the spine gently braced and kept straicrht
and the swell of the breast encouraged by the amplitude
ot the curves enclosing it. One recommendation of such
a bodice is that it will not continue to fit if tightly laced
IvCJ'T ^j^^^^^of « ^«nd viciously-then break, and
puck the sides of the transgressor. The finely tempered
steel fronts guarding chest and stomach snap and the
garment must be thrown aside, ruined threugh ill-usage
Another time the foolish wearer will know better thtn
maket^""^ ^^ ''''^ ^"""^ ^'^'^ Rational Corset-

I make a place gratefully here for part of an article
on Dress Eetorm," which I clip from the xYewark (^ J)
Daily Advertiser. It is a " leader," from the pen of the
scholarly and practical editor, Dr. S. B Hunt

I have an object in drawing freely from prominent
journals pertinent comments upon the subject of this

the duft of the best minds, the conclusions reached by
the most acute perceptions in a profession that Holds in
its working ranks some of the ablest men of our limes
Ihe ijress IS not an instructor alone nor yet the minute
recorder of passing events, nor again onl> the Physician
that counts pu se, respiration, degrees of temperature in
the system of the mighty Public it has in ward. It is
the Seer of the Century, chronicling the coming of wind
and storm and pestilence and the majesty of fair
weather, when air and sky are to the common observer
without presage. "►^ocivei

260

DRESS.

I insert extr is from periodicals and from books,— as
well-written and as much to the point under consideara-
tionas Dr. Hunt's,— in the body of our volume, in pre-
terence to using them as foot-notes, for two reasons.

I would avail myself to the full of the apt quotation,
borrowing for my opinions all the aid the endorsement
can give. And, secondly, I would insure for the extract
a, reading more careful than the casual glance that scarcely
lingers longer on the starred foot-note than while the
page IS somewhat leisurely turned.

The testimony of so intelligent a professional man and
writer upon physiology and hygicL . uot to be carelesslv
dismissed even by the radical unused to seeing over or
around, his hobby. * '

"Mcu are supposed to dress with simple reference to
comfort Women, for some inscrutable reason, are equally
supposed to torture themselves for the sake of shape, and
there has been no enJ of fooli.-h talk on the subject of
tigM lacing and small waists, all resulting in absurd and
inartistic exaggerations of the female form. The hum-
bugs in ladies' dress are plain enough, and any observer
even the most charitable, detects the padding of the too
voluminous form, interrupted by a closely girded and
slender waist How many volumes have been written on
the subject of tight lacing can never be told. It has been
howled about from platforms and in all the virtuous
magazmes. But the fact is that a woman who affects
loose garments is lazy and violates the laws of her forma-
tion The present style of dress, close-fitting and clinging
« qfu""-' ^^ "^^^'^y* ^"* ^* ^^ very womanly.
" I T^®^' anatomists and physiologists say that a
man breathes with his abdomen. There is a regular in-
crease m the expansion of his chest down to the line of
the midnff or diaphragm. The lower ribs are freely
movable, widen out with every inspiration, and crawl in
with every expiration, while the muscles of the abdominal
walls supply the exhaust and the expulsive force of the

DRESS.

261

lungs above. That constitutes the manly form. It is a

oXrwf ^'r^'^H^- ^"*^*^^ nol womanly and
only a lazy or, to use a phrase as descriptive as it is coarse
a'sozzhng' woman will habitually wear a loose ^own
^o^ n'//r'/^1 P>i«l«gi«t« rega^rd as tLe proper sup^
fife in wJl/'""^^' •"'.? ^^^^ engaged in the industries ?f
8en;p of 1 ^"^ °' '? *^' "P"^^* P°«^^i°°- The universal

i!Zh!ZlTV ^M-f' ''^^r^' ^^«°"^™ i^ appearance.
IS to be well set-up/ l,ke a soldier going on guard-mount

who IS expected to be clean throughout^closf ly-buttoS
and steadily erect, When we speak of a m^an who is
'soldierly,; we mean a fellow with high shoXeTs fu
wi.?SP-''T' ""^'S' ^"^ *^^^ fi^^l^^' ^ith rather ight

West hTlHh nf ^ ^^Vressed mean the highest and no-
Sit^on, f ,^^^^/-^e mean precisely the opposite
mTn ' »^T"' •.wl°'! ^o^^Jead is an excellent thing in wo-
man, and with that go the drooping shoulder, the dimin-
ishing waist, and the full lower form which it is a dis^ace
for any man to carry around. The Greek sculptorsTad
'Thrp/^'''^'*^' ^^^, 'H^ charmingly expressed in the
'i^TheSTf '' f.^ork which is a^ pure as it is beautiful
in. J ^"1^*^^^ PT* ^" *h^« ^hicl^ ^e do not think

Z?ow!r? other indelicacy than such a^ pertains to aU
anatomica f^cts When a woman breathes, or it may be

h^^uLT r'^r^J^^T''^-^^ girl, she breathes with
her upper nbs and lifts her collar bones. No healthv

S^nuL^'^'v' ^" that direction. When we see I
man puffing up his upper chest the immediate suggestion
^ that consumption is his doom. With a woman the

ri%rwV'"rr^^°i^ ^^ «^^^<^ ^^^ glorious

Health. The bottom fact is, that the nearer a woman

cZr^Thf; "'""i^?.^ 'r ^ "^-^ "°--d she be"
comes. The reason o* the female form, the scanty waist
the strong but nairow diaphragm, are a part of thi Zfo-

Sowinl W^'^^V r'^'^.i!'' resistance of our occasional
growing force, which, with a man's natural form, would

...Mi.,

262

DRESS.

obstruct the action of the heart and impe.le the respira-
tion. J he anatomista, who have seen thousan-ls of
skeJetons of savage or civilized training, find alwa>s the
diminishing waist in women, and lb* y know why
*i,"/-[w ^^^ the lecturing on tiglu racing, the truth is
that JNature demands by her most imperative Ir v/s that
women should have small waists, and that the misery and
harm undoubtedly inflicted by the over-use of coisets is
only a olirid and ignorant obedience to ania,^tiiK:t,whi.-h
properly (directed, is graceful and natural. Stiil, there
are com; v;n.'nt ;:-ontlemeu who think that their wives and
daughters i.houid Irave the same form of chest as them-
selves, and tJ.ere aro doctrinarians who reason that in-
stead of bieav,hing with the thorax, as women always do
they sriou.d breathe wi^h the abdomen, as men always do'
Ood ordered otherwise,"

We may further congratulate our sex uppn thr. aboli-
tion of the terrible custom of wearing upon hips and
stomach such an immoderate number of skirts as were
essential to the peace of mind of the fashionist who
flourished m our mothers' time, or in our school-days
•11 ^f^ J^^^ ^^ exaggeration when the satiric cartoons of
Illustrated weeklies portrayed the full-dressed belle
wedged in a door of regulation width, or filling the
Vhol^ interior of a coach, her escort riding upon the
roof. Over the wide dispread cage of wire or crinoline
that gave the balloon-shape to the outer casings, she
sported twelve or fifteen petticoats, most of them heavv
with starch and tuckings. On the top of all floated a
gown-skirt ten yards in circumference, and often flounced
at the bottom.

I well recollect the horrified expression of a physician
who, on being aroused at midnight by the sudden illness
ot his daughter, picked up from a chair her clothincr
minus the dress proper, as she had cast it aside ei .retir-
ing, and bore it off to the store-room to be ' hed
Ihere were twenty poimd^ of it. Just at thf/. . of

DRESS.

e.Ifl the rc-jpira-
1 thousands of
find alwaj s the
low why;
ag, the truth is
rat ive Irr/s that
tiie misery and
se of eoisets is
.in,4ii!ct,whxv'h,
i\. Still, there
their wives and
chest as them-
reason that in-
men always do,
men always do.

upQn the aboli-
upon hips and

skirts as were
fashionist who
iir school-days,
iric cartoons of
l-dressed belle
, or filling the
ding upon the
ire or crinoline
3r casings, she
3f them heavy
>f all floated a

often flounced

of a physician

sudden illness

? her clothing,

aside e.i *'etir-

3 be - - Hod.

at fchf, .. of

263

I^ ashion's history, corsets were entirely " out." This, mrl

m^Z'T" r^ rr^^^^ «^ '^' ''^^^'^' had carS
frl tW ' ^°"°\ ^y *^P^«' ^^^""^ ^ ^aist defended

Tnt^fl^sr^^- '''' ''- stringsUc^Lt^Sif

'dn^rnf^r ^''- ?o'^^°^ ^^""^ ^^««^ibes the court-dress
jdate of January 23, 1738) of Lady Huntingdon-Whit!
fields Lady Huntingdon-the warn advocate ten years
its.- '^" P"^'^P^'' "^ *^« "Calvinistic mS

chime- ^ft*''°ff ™ 1^^^'^ velvet, embroidered with
'Sowers tEff''' ^^"T '^"°" '"^^ fi"«d with ramp-
npffS / .t ^'^^^^ ^^'"^^^ <^ver a breadth of tfie
petticoat from the bottom to the top. Between each vase
of flowers wa^ a pattern of gold sheik, and foWe
enibossed and most heavily rich.^ The gown was whIb
satm, embroidered also with chenille, mTxt ™h .old

trTaif^It was""" ^°. ^K^^^^^^' ^"^ *"« "«^--n
tne tan. It was a most laboured piece of finerv th^

appardo?r'l T^'^'^ ''' a stucco^taircl S 1^
every step that she took under the load."

In 1760 she commends a " negligS " for her ffrand-nipna

sTou^d\ : oTtf ^^ "^'^ *°-?? °''" - - notTdrar^^^^^^
sens^blyT-! ^'"'"'"^ ^'^ ^"'^^^^^' ^^^^ subjoins most

J7J^A t* 'J^^y/^d impertinence of dress is always to be
«Zf ^'.^^ ^ ^'''^^' compliance with the fashion is less
affected than any remarkable negligence of it"

It IS refreshing to reflect that we no longer endanrr^r
our lives by walking through slush »^^..JT^
pavements in thin supers, ort af s^U andXphrS
with external applications of "vanity" and vexation^S

loot High of putt and powder, or short waists that bring

if-

i'-i

K^J

264

DBESS.

the stricture of skirt-bindings and gown-belts directly
upon the tender breasts and most vulnerable portion of
the lungs. Our costume has still enough uncured follies
encrusting it, but they are not enormities.

Now for the homelier, but not less important details of
the toilette. And if the intelligent reader is amused and
provoked at the circumstantiality with which simple
directions are given, — "the things which everybody
knows ! " — I beg her to believe the assertion that every-
body does not obey in these respects what seem to her
the dictates of common decency and such knowledge
of health laws as the poorest and meanest Christian in
this country should possess. Everybody does not know
— or, knowing, does not live up to her belief— that exha-
lations from the body are dirt, and that dirt of all kinds,
if we except dry earth, is malodorous.

The night dress should be warm in winter, cool in sum-
mer, and always loose in every part, that the blood may
recede naturally from the brain, and tiie slackened play
of heart and lungs go on evenly and healthfully. What-
ever has been worn in the day must be shaken hard when
taken off, and each piece hung or laid out separately
upon a nail or chair. The like precaution ought to be ob-
served in removing the night-gown in the morning. The
clinging humours thrown off by the pores, sleeping and
waking, may be dislodged in part while still warm. If
suffered to soak in cooling into the fabric, they become
offensive to sight and smell, and the fruitful source of
disease. In plain language, they may be described as
effete animal matter that decomposes rapidly, and with
putrefaction, emits a sickening odour.

Immediately upon rising, the bed-coverings should be
removed, shaken and spread out over foot-board or chairs,
and the mattress be left exposed to the air admitted
from open windows. The practice of making up a bed
while still warm from the heat of the human body is im-
clean, and, like most uncleaness, unwholesome. The body

!•

DBESS.

265

belts directly
)le portion of
acured follies

mt details of
amused and
^hich simple
I everybody
1 that every-
seem to her
I knowledge
Christian in
3s not know
—that exha-
of all kinds,

cool in sum-
e blood may
ckened play
illy. What-
n hard when
t separately
ht to be ob-
rning. The
deeping and
1 warm. If
;hey become
'ul source of
[escribed as
fT, and with

s should be
rd or chairs,
ir admitted
g up a bed
Dody is un-
The body

actually loses weight during the hours of sleep, as has
been demonstrated by repeated experiments. The escap-
ing effluvia (the term is just, however impolite) hang, a
viewless vapour in the air, steep linen, and reek in blan-
kets. You can smell them on re-entering your closed
bed-room after you have been in the outer air for a few
minutes. If they were never so faintly coloured, the day
would break dimly upon your waking eyes. Were it
possible to eliminate them from the air and condense
them, you would behold a pound of corrupt matter from
which you would shrink with loathing unutterable. Yet
you swallow and inhale this with every word and baeath
while you remain in an unventilated sleeping-chamber.

Much of this liberated vapour is carbonic-acid gas, and
deadly to all animal matter. The bad taste in your
mouth before you brush your teeth, the " tight " feeling
about your head, the slight giddiness and nausea that
pass away in the bath— all are symptoms of one disorder.
You are poisoned. Your bedroom, however elegant in its
appointments, has been all night a grotto del cane. Un-
aired and undeodorized clothes upon bed or body are as
truly empoisoned as was the shirt of Nessus ; albeit usually
slow in operation. Pile on clean blankets, shaken and
and cooled every morning, if you " sleep cold," and set a
screen between you and direct draughts ; but secure, by
means of lowered or raised sashes, a bounteous cunent of
pure air to replenish the lung-supply and to sweep out
noisome exudations.

It is often objected, when frequent changes of body-
linen are recommended and positively enjoined in warm
weather, that the family-wash is thereby made too heavy.
Without staying to inquire what may be the truer econ-
omy in such cases, to pay laundress or druggist, I would
suggest that the difficulty may be obviated in some mea-
sure by judicious management on the part of each wearer.
Two chauges per week will generally suffice, even in
summer, provided t\'..>y under-gannent is shaken and

ill

M.j

'III

'?/t^'

266

DBESS.

aired thoroughly — when practicable, sunned — before it is
resumed. Thup the linen worn in the forenoon may be
removed when one dresses for j' . :rnoon, and hung
where the air can blow freely over it until next morning.
The set for afternoon has in turn the same opportunity
for disinfectment. A garment assumed while still damp
with perspiration is sure to become offensive. This rule
premises that aired raiment shall be put upon newly-
wanhed bodies. The bath-room is the best preventive of
excessive labour in the laundry. Body linen that has
been yellowed in the wearing has to be rubbed so hard
tiiat it soon wears out.

" Why ? " asks Corinna BLolgate in her study of Grecian
Myths, preparatory to a " Higb Culture tea — " why was
Venus fabled to have arisen fr ^m the foam of the sea ? "

Aunt Ildy " shot back ihe answer, quick as a flash. \>i
irony of common sense, out of a swift, frowning cloud of
contempt " : —

" Because vou must be clean before you can be beauti-
ful!"

n^>

5d — before it is
renoon may be
oon, and hung
next morning,
le opportunity
hile still damp
Lve. This rule
t upon newly-
t preventive of
linen that has
ubbed so hard

udy of Grecian
ica — " why was
1 of the sea ? "
c as a flash, u
svning cloud of

can be beauti-

CHAPTER XX.

GOSSIP.

" But the man did neither look up, nor regard, but raked U< himself tha
straws, the small sticks, and dust of the tLooT:'—Bunyan'» Pilgrim: a Pro^

" People will talk. ' Ciamin lo dice' Is a tune that is played oftener
than „he national air of this country, or any other."— O/ivcr Wmdel

1, "}X "™^er that Abbie Ann once put out her washing, and this fact
kept the ,vhole social element of Cedar Swamp on the qui vive for a num.
Dtir ot dv^ys/' -Cape Codlolks. « um

Dr. 1 .uLLANP has told us that " the cure for ffossio
is culture." ^ ^

The prescript, n is excellent— as far as it goes. But
weeds spring faster and flourish more rankly in a plough-
ed and enrich(>d field than in the hard soil of a common.
It was into the swept and garnished house that the seven
unclean spirits followed their host.

To the culture— intellectual— that sharpens percep-
tive faculties and disposes the whole mind to activity,
must be added worthy and regular occupation, and just
moral sense, integrity of pu -pose and speech, and Chris-
tian chanty in construction of others' actions and mo-
tives, if we wcnld save our educated young women from
the favourite pastime of their inferiors— gossiping.

Among the woful perversions of terms in our lan-
guage, th. inside-out twist which the good old Saxon
word " gossip " has sustained may .-laim a bad eminence.

' U i i ,

i f

2G8

Gossir.

" Godsibl)— a viiation by a religious obligation. From
God, and sib, an alliance."

Thus Webster — and in close connection — " One who
runs from house to house, telling news; an idle tattler."

A pretty word, little used, is " gossipry." It has a
quaint crispness about it to which tongue and ear take
kindly. It signifies " idle talk, gossip, or — anomalous
association ! — " Spiritual relationship or affinity."

It is evident to the non-philological reader, as to the
verbalist, that we sorely need substantive and verb to
express what we all have reason to know so well ; that
which, with many women, fills up the gaps left in
thoughts and lives by the absence of a specific object.
One that would so absorb into itself the wandering
energies, so possess the liiind that everything small —
using the word as a synonym of unworthy — would be
crowded out. Without this, the runners that should be
trained into use and fruitfulncss, trail wildly hither and
yon, and like the muck-rake, take up straws, and sticks,
and dust. How intricate and unsightly is the mat thus
formed, let the history of every neighbourhood, the un-
written stories of blasted reputations, thwarted lives,
and broken hearts testify.

Where is the first false step ? A.t what juncture of the
girl's experience does it begin to become pleasanter to
believe the tale which casts a shadow than that which
illumines ; easier to credit disparagement of an acquaint-
ance than to receive gladly a narrative which is honour-
able to the subject and to human nature ? When — fol-
lowing the deflected line — do even the amiable and
refined acquire a positive relish for tainted meats — in
culinary parlance, fiigh game ? Is there a biting spice
of truth in the pessimistic jeu d'esprit — " There is some-
thing pleasant to us in the misfortunes of even our best
friends?"

^ Am / uncharitable? hasty to judge and to condemn
thoughtless speech ? May it not be that righteous in-

GOSSIP.

fation. From

269

dimanon at the unchecked prowth of n popular' evil
takes on the vision and expression of personal rancour ?
Iheexperu^nco and observation that lead an individual
teacher to a certain conclusion may bo unfortunate and
exceptional.

Test my declaration for yourself, my clean-hearted
Mary, glowing with the novelty of the home-coming •
eager to ply in the field which is the worhl, the craft
learned m the garden-plot of the school. Relate to a
lively circle of your compeers in social station and edu-
cation, a story of human heroism, of virtue that was proof
agamst temptation, of self-denial and sorrow borne meekly
that others might not suffer, of patient toil for noble
ends. Use all the eloquence of feeling and forcible diction
to send the lesson Korae to each heart. You are heard
with attention, because the tale is cleverly wrought up
All combine to pronounce it " interesting," perhaps " beau-
tiful and touching." One optimist boldly affirms that it
IS "gratifying to the finest feelings of the heart." Here
and there an eye kindles and softens under a mist of un-
shed tears. But people, as a mass, are coy in the display
of their "finest feelings." There is danger, where some
are concerned, of mistaking the casket where these trea-
sures are stored for a lumber-chest. The main current of
talk bears swiftly away from the topic introduced by you.
The optimist may roll the sweet morsel under his tongue,
but he does it alter the manner of ruminating animals, in
silence. There is little to provoke discussion in what you
have related. It is too round and smooth, by half for
enterprising wits. To all it is commonplace. To some it
IS vapid.

Do not you supply an antipodal theme that the experi-
ment may be fairly tried. The prolmbility is that you
will not have to wait long before a r /nical slur upon
truth, goodness, faith— something that comes under the
heau Oi Paul's - whatsoever things are honourable, just,
pure, lovely, of good report "—excites general mirth, tem-
Q

f: \\

270

GOSSIP.

f ^ ;t|

pered by weak disclaim. Or an adventurous spirit, am-
bitious of repute as a judge of character, a " knowing "
critic, tells his tale of adroit hypocrisy or bare-faced ini-
quity. What I have long ago named in my own mind,
" the blue-bottle-fly instinct," awakens at the dexterous
touch, the scent of decay. The story is caught up;
tossed from an earnest listener to a laughing questioner,
pulled to pieces, that the juices and marrow may be
sucked and even the revellers fatten upon the extracted
richness. Even the few who do not share in the feast
are less disgusted than they think or would admit to
others. They retain what .t;hey have not relished. The
limed twig does not hold them, but they carry away be-
fouled feet.

The gamin who would not harken to a story of a good
little boy, unless he might afterward be treated to one
about two bad little boys — "uncommon rum uns, you
know "—was honest in the expression of this instinct.
At heart he was a nascent vulture, and in his simplicity,
revealed the hankering after carrion.

The deduction from these and kindred examples is
humiliating, as tending to prove that the taste for " high "
game is inborn, and that we possess it in common with
vermin and the lower orders of birds of prey. It lurks,
embryonic, in that recess of unimaginable horrors, the
human heart, awaiting the process which is to warm it
into active life, or cast it forth a wretched abortion.
When allowed to survive, it grows very fast, as do all
larvfe bred in corruption, and feeding upon the same.
The tittle-tattle of idle moments becomes the tattle of
hours that ought to be busy, and tattle, when it has con-
ceived, brings forth scandal. Witness against a neighbour,
however light its import, passes almost inevitably, by in-
sensible gradations, into false witness. -

The girl retails with mischievous glee her cleverness
in discovering the truth that a schoolmate's winter hat,

GOSSIP.

271

•ous spirit, am-
, a " knowing "
bare-faced ini-
my own mind,
i the dexterous
is caught up ;
ing questioner,
arrow may be
. the extracted
re in the feast
'^ould admit to
relished. The
carry away be-

story of a good
treated to one
rum uns, you
f this instinct.
I his simplicity,

3d examples is
aste for " high "
1 common with
)rey. It lurks,
ble horrors, the
L is to warm it
tched abortion.
' fast, as do all
ipon the same,
es the tattle of
^hen it has con-
Qst a neighbour,
evitably, by in-

} her cleverness
.te's winter hat,

which all the girls think " awfully'stylish," was nyide by
the wearer's eldest sister.

" Queer— isn't it ? when their father is so rich ? It
must be sheer stinginess that leads them to do such
things. Indeed the family have the reputation of beino-
parsimonious. Or, it may be that they are not so well
off as the world says. Their handsome carriage and
horses, fine furniture, and lofty ways generally, may be
but a hollow show. It is surprising— unaccountable—
wicked in people to strain and struggle as some do to
keep up appearances. Why can't they be honest, through
and thj'ough ? "

" Haven't I heard something about the low origin of
the family 1 " ventures an auditor, musingly, her ambi- .
tion and imagination aroused by the narrative and
tempting conjectures. " For aught we know, the mother
may have been a milliner, and the taste foi- dabbling in
bonnet-making may be hereditary. Such things do hap-
pen, you know, in what is called our best society."

" I c|in believe anything now ! " The author of the
gossip is always the first to believe in its authenticity.
" I can never trust Carry Smith again as I did before I
fou?id out that about her hat. Why, she let us praise it,
over and over, without once intimating that it did not
colv.' from a milliner's. Straws show which way the
Vviac! dIows."

_ By now the hum>nd sting of the'," maybes " from the
hive on which she began tapping "for fun," have angered
her. Mirth has given place to wrath.

" If there is one trait which I hate above all others, it
is deception ! I can not endure anything in the least
underhanded ! " ^ & .

From this time henceforward she and" her clique will
watch Carry Smith ; 'keep her ' at the focused-point of a
moral microscope. By such easy descent is gained the
plane of the slanderer. Without bein^ conscM)uslv mali-
cious, the bias of her belief is in the direction of detraction.

i : ':

I ill

'%l

272

GOSSIP.

It is safe — so runs her knowing reckoning — to parody
the dreary old hymn and

" Suspect Bome danger near
Where others see delight."

The gossip prides herself, by and by — and alamiingly
soon — upon not being hoodwinked by devices of amiable
seeming that impose upon the ordinary observer. No
action is motiveless, and when the motive appears upon
the surface, it is presumably a specious pretence. The
professional detective dives below it for sinister designs ;
turns the bull's eye of Diogenes' lantern into the compli-
cations of moral machinery for indications of dishonest
purpose, the wheel within a wheel. In her natural phil-
osophy there is no such thing as a simple mechanical
power. It must come to pass that she will invent motive
and inner wheel rather than be disappointed in her quest.

A woman who may be twenty -five years of age, but
who, in face and manner, might be nineteen, a limpid-
eyed, velvet-voiced ingenue, laughed in my face last week
when I firmly declined to believe that a man whom she
professed to like, and whom I had thought good and hon-
ourable, was a masked roae,

" My dear madam," said the soft voice, "you always
amuse me excessively. You are so refreshingly unsophis-
ticated ! My theory is that it is best to doubt whatever
looks fair. Men are all alike, you know — and women,
for that matter ! " with a ripple of sweet laughter. " Only
we dissemble more gracefully ! "

I, who am old enough to be the married belle's mother,
eyed her in dumb admiration as a perfect specimen of her
kind. The sheen of her draperies, the brilliant eyes, the
dreamy legato of her speech, the deliberate delight of her
regalement upon the thing she had tainted indicated be-
yond the shadow of misgiving the carrion fly {Muaca
CcBsar).*

— »■. ».i—i. ■ ■ ■■■■I, I . . , I iM„ „ . ^,, , „„ — .^MW..— . M i.i a m I ^-^tr^^t^t m mtmm,

*An aiiled species is the Muaca Vomitoria.

ig — to parody

nd alarmingly
ces of amiable
observer. No
appears upon
>retence. The
ister designs ;
to the compli-
s of dishonest
f natural phil-
le mechanical
invent motive
d in her quest.
irs of age, but
een, a limpid-
face last week
an whom she
good and hon-

"you always
igly unsophis-
ubt whatever
—and women,
fhter. " Only

belle's mother,
jeeimen of her
iant eyes, the
delight of her
indicated be-
)n fly {Muaca

GOSSIP.

273

Yet she is not a misanthrope in the usual acceptation
of the word. She enjoys life, its bustle, variety, and
chatter, and dearly loves her work. She gloats over a
temptmgly-foul morsel of scandal with the tantalizing
vivacity of the big blue abomination that buzzes patience
and senses out of you on "muggy " August afternoons,
and awakens within you fresh access of compassion for
the much-bevapoured Mariana in whose tortured ear,

" The blue fly sang i' the pane."

Nine chances out of ten our Musca Gcesar establishes
to her own satisfaction some claims to the title of wit.
The showiest fun at the lowest rates is to be had by turn-
ing the peculiarities and foibles of acquaintances into
ridicule. A mimicking grimace that would damage the
self-respect of a dissolute monkey brings the performer
into the admiring notice of a whole company when the
tide of entertainment is at the ebb. He has raised a
laugh and " showed up " a fellow-creature. Therefore the
party is grateful, -and repays the eflfort in applause as
cheap as the wit that elicits it.

"Pshaw!" cries Lady Sneerwell in the "School for
bcandal, — " there's no possibility of being witty without
a little ill-nature. The malice of a good thing is tho barb
that makes it stick."

How easily the accomplishment of mimicry is acquired
and Its popularity, we see illustrated in the early success
of Lady Teazle with Sir Benjamin Backbite's clique.
1 he country-girl lately wedded by Sir Peter, thus des-
cribes to her husband the "curious life" she led as " the
daughter of a plain country squire " :

" My daily occupation was to inspect the dairy, super-
intend the poultry, make extracts from the family receipt-
book, and comb my Aunt Deborah's lap-dog. And then

J^^^^S^^^fL^^r"/"^ amusements! To draw patterns'
xor ru^es nhich I had not materials to make up, to play
Pope Joan with the curate ; to read a sermon to my aunt,

ill I

274

GOSSIP.

or to be stuck down to <an old spinet to strum my father
to sleep after a fox-chase."

Into the emptiness of this life fall a rich husband and
a career as beauty and wit, Lady Sneerwell's set supply-
ing the latter.

" When I say an ill-natured thing, 'tis out of pure good
humour," she protests.

Here is a sample of this sort of good humour :

" When she is neither spe-./ving nor laughing (which
very seldom happens), she never absolutely shuts her
mouth, but leaves it always on ajar, as it were — thus :
(Shows her teeth).

" I allow even that's better than the pains Mrs. Prim
takes to conceal her losses in front. She draws her mouth
till it positively resembles the aperture of a poor's-box,
and all her words appear to slide out edgewise, as it were
— thus : ' How do you do, madam ? Yes, madam ! ' "
(Mimics).

This iii coarse, but so is all scandal. From the very
character of the entertainment refinement can not be a
constituent element. It costs less and goes further than
any other social diversion, but it is a caviare to which
" the general " — viz., the majority — decidedly incline.

Gossipry — to employ the term we like — is not, per se,
scandal, nor is scandal necessarily slander.' These sustain
the same relation to false-witness-bearing that regular
moderate-drinking does to confirmed inebriety. The most
innocent " tippling " is a dangerous indulgence in an age
when the taste for stimulants develops with terrible fa-
cility into passion.

I should stultify myself and insult your good sense
were I to intimate that unfavourable criticism of acquaint-
ances and comment upon conduct is always unfriendly
and ill-bred. There is a radical dissimilarity between
fair adverse judgment temperately stated and abuse zest-
fully utterod. It is occasionallv r dutv tn .s'^e.'i.lc o'^p.nl^''
of faults that mar some characters we would fain admire.

Hi- ii-

aossip.

276

m my father

husband and
's set supply-

ofpuve good

our:

rhing (which

ly shuts her

were — thus :

s Mrs. Prim
vs her mouth
a poor's-box,
ise, as it were
. madatn ! ' "

om the very
can not be a
further than
are to which
y incline.
s not, per se,
rhese sustain
that regular
y. The most
Qce in an age
h terrible fa-

r good sense
1 of acquaint-
s imfriendly
•ity between
d abuse zesc-

fam adraire.

If you are constrained by your knowledge of these to
withhold esteem, or shun associations approved by others,
it may not be only proper, but in certain circumstances
obligatory upon you, to state why you act thus. It is a
duty to shield yourself from the imputation of causeless
prejudice and to protect others from the risk of misplaced
confidence. This, however — do not forget ! — is duty and
disagreeable; not pastime or pleasant. When you are
conscious of a thrill of excitement that is not dread nerv-
ing you to the performance of the obligation, pause for
severe examination of motives and spirit. CharitaHe
Christians do not bring to such an expose elation or even
cheerful resignation.

So well understood is this principle, that the profes-
sional scandal-monger lards her piquant dishes with pro-
testations of reluctance. Even those who listen and credit,
smile slyly in recognising preamble and peroration. She
would not be unfair for a hemisphere nor unkind for the
world. She calls heaven to witness to the purity of her
intentions, angels and men to " overhaul " her heart and
" make a note " of the unfeigned grief with which she in-
dustriously sows dragons' teeth in her neighbour's grounds.
She would not act as unlicensed victualler of the region,
hawking " high " meats from door to door, if the duty
were not laid upon her by fate and strapped upon her
groaning shoulders by conscience. The sight of such an
one becomes microscopic with the practice of her profes-
sion. If furnished with a telescope she would instinct-
ively reverse it to look through the bigger end. Her
specialty and craze are for belittling and demeaning, not
for broadening, never for elevating.

The cure of this plague of tongues in individuals and
in communities begins, as do most efiectual cures, at home.
No better municipal regulation for cleansing thorough-
fares has yet been enforced than the law requiring every

his own door.

Qiisuu the stroot in frOiit o£

276

GOSSIP.

\fM tm.

'U4 4

Set before you steadily a few leading facts and the de-
ductions drawn from these and frame your conduct upon
them, let your neighbours do as they will. First, that
four-fifths of the fault-finding and would-be-setting-to-
rights done in this life of ours is altogether gratuitous —
in inception and execution a work of supererogation.
" Nobody's _ business " is best left undone when Every-
body has his hands more than full of his own — or ought
to have.

Next, that your time and powers are too costly to be
wasted in the consideration of what your neighbours eat,
drink, wear, say and do. In this sense, assuredly, you
are not your brother's or sister's keeper. He who can
build wisely and well, desecrates his talents and squanders
his strength when he sets about pulling down walls and
sorting rubbish.

_ Thirdly, that all the intermeddling of the busiest gos-
sips in town and country will not do the work you, in
your proper and single personality, were sent into the
world to perform, or release you from the responsibilities
of that position. Your account is to be rendered to the
Master, not to man.

" There are gods many, and lords many ; yet to us there
is but One God, the Father, of whom are all things and
we unto Him."

It helps the soul perplexed by a multitude of officious
counsels to look away from friend and foe, to this one in-
fallible Refuge and Strength. Do your best as unto God,
and leave the result to Him. This is the opo invariable
rule of life. Naught can absolve you from the sin of
neglecting it. The peace that ensues upon obedience to
it bears the spirit on eagles' wings into the sunshine that
abides continually above the clouds which press earth-
ward

Lastly, that, according to your view of time's value and
brevity, the average term of human existence is not long
enough in whioh to execute that which you ought, by

its and the de-
conduct upon
I. First, that
-be-setting-to-
r gratuitous —
upererogation.
when Every-
wu — or ought

•o costly to be
eigh hours eat,
assuredly, you
He who can
and squanders
)wn walls and

le busiest gos-
work you, in
sent into the
Bsponsibilities
adered to the

et to us there
<11 things and

le of officious
bo this one in-
; as unto God,
PG invariable
tn the sin of
obedience to
sunshine that
. press earth-

le's value and
36 is not long
ou ought, by

GOSSIP,

277

now, to have made up your mind to do. It is a divine
impatience that makes you intolerant of the loss of hours
and breath in the discussion of " They-says "—the filina
of the fine gold under careless or wanton hands. You do
well to be angry at such prodigality of another's
wealth.

To change the figure ; if the gossip must make mince-
meat—seasoned with the malice without which it would
be insipid — of her neighbours' characters, teach her by
firm but polite measures that you will lend neither tray,
chopping-knife, nor condiments. You can not repress
her zeal in the prosecution of her trade. You can pre-
vent her from using your clean rooms as shambles or
kitchen.

Where varieties of the Musca Ccesar, or her cousin, the
Musca Vomitoria, do much abound, prudent housekeepers
will put up " fly-doors," and keep their meats out of the
way.

Judged by such reasoning and examples, tattling in its
least harmful form sinks to its right place — that of a
vulgar vice. For the truth of this statement I appeal
confidently to your knowledge of the sense of self-degra-
dation with which you recall, in the solitude of your
chamber, the talk of an evening, during which the foibles
and private histories of people, and not " the real things,"
have kept tongues busily at work and been the food of
thought. You are disgusted at your own folly, vexed
with those who have led you into" dirty lanes and across
bogs, instead of over sunny spaces and up to breezy
heights. It is a yet graver question how often this ex-
perience may be repeated without blunting your moral
and intellectual tastes ; how soon toleration will be fol-
lowed by perversion. Regard as a wholesome symptom
the shame that impels you to avoid looking in the de-
tractor's face as the story of another's blemishes is re-
hearsed. Bashfulnfisa iti t.hp. honrin"' i° xnViim . <,T.ri,,r.^2-j
ness m replying is grace.

' S*"

ifi

; 1 1

] m

■M

' 1

=11

III

li m

ill

WW ft

..^*.,

278

GOSSIP.

J'"
I' '

lis FT

t a

'Tis safest

• " • \V\ '" ™a<^""iO"y to begin with a little aver-
sion is a Malapropish bull. In gossipry it is safe and
sensible to begin with a great deal for the subject, and

scfndaT^ °" ^°"'" ^^""'^ ^^^'''^^ ^^^ '■®^'^^'' °^ *^«

The harpies tainted in touching' their food The
slanderer who loves her craft has abundant internal
evidence of her descent from a renowned and ancient, if
somewhat disreputable, line. Being carnivorous and
insatiable, you may not hope to escape her talons when

flSf . "'■'ir"'^'- I* '■' "^* «"'^"Sh that you are con-
hdent in the sense of stainless rectitude. Fair and un-
polluted flesh becomes a loathsome mass when she has
had the handlmg of it, and the M. Cjesar brood bloat
upon Iier leavings.

,u^l ly ^^taphors offend nice taste, please remember
that the theme is one not suited to the employment of
dehcate epithets. The despicable filthiness of the thincr
can not be exaggerated in the telling of it. I would li
1 could, make the commerce in characters, mildly called

backbiting, as odious as that plied by the vilest of
women ; would organize our girls into crusading leagues
— total-abstmence bands for the suppression of this
scourge of social circles and Christian churches. And
why not ? Whose hand wrote " Thou shall not hear false
witnessagamst thy neighbour " upon the same tablet and
in direct proximity with —

" Thou Shalt not kill,

" Thou shalt not commit adultery and

" Thou shalt not steal ! "

Do I strain the truth in declaring that the slanderer is
thiet, panderer and assassin all in one— an accursed trinity
of death and woe ? It is time that decent Christians and
philanthropists awoke to the real nature of this sin The
weight of public opinion, if not churchly discipline, should
crush the traffickers in rumours that orow into lies with
the passage trom one lip to another.

GOSSIP.

279

a little aver-
tt is safe and
3 subject, and
•etailer of the

r food. The
dant internal
md ancient, if
oivorous and
r talons when
you are con-
Fair and un-
vhen she has
r brood bloat

ise remember
nployment of
I of the thinsr
I would, if
mildly called
the vilest of
iding leagues
si on of this
irches. And
not hear false
me tablet and

e slanderer is
jursed trinity
hristians and
;his sin. The
ipline, should
into lies with

Repeat nothing that

. . _ „ I flo not yourself believe," ,

principle the practice of which would put an embargo
upon three-fourths of the infamous business. Should
more stringent means be needed—" Give with the tale
the name of the responsible author." The enforcement
of this brace of decrees would, in a month's time, cause a
precipitate and a settlement in the foul river that would
leave the current clear.

I forewarn you that your avoidance of the disposition
and habit you are so ready to contemn will be a thorny
undertaking. Your talk of books and what they teach
will be stigmatized as pedantic ; the discussion of Nature
and of Art as arrant affectation. Strangest of all, your
defence of the assailed will be resented by the benevolent
disciple of the Backbite school, who would not knowitigly
do injustice to her worst enemy—if she had one. Heaven
knows that slie hates nobody ! You may be sure that
your attempt at vindication of the slandered person, your
civil endeavour to correct a " misunderstanding, natural
perhaps, but deplorable," will be ascribed to the least
commendable motive her invention is capable of supply-
ing. More could hardly be said for the ingenuity of ma-
lignity pure et simple. I have but to append that you
must take your choice of the two evils.

No ! _ " Culture " of the mind and taste is not a cure
for gossip in its milder features, or even for coarser and
downright scandal. If it were, this chapter would never
have been penned. Nor is it true that one who has clean
hands and a pure heart can defy the Sneerwells and
Snakes of the politest society in the most refined city of
the most virtuous commonwealth of ou^ Union.

I pass several times a week through a fashionable
quarter of a handsome town, and by an elegant house,
the residence of an amiable and opulent gentleman. At
a certain window of this mansion Mrs. Arachne Webb
sits behind a cleverly-adjusted blind for hours of the
daylight and the darkness. She is not old, nor yet silly

r I i j

280

GOSSIP.

In her youth she was a belle, and still "makes up " well
m the evening. She has all that wealth and social
standing and an indulgent husband can give her The
world has treated her well from her cradle. What niove.s
•her to watch, in her lace-draped corner, for the passajje
ot possible victims of fang and line ? Heaven has been
propitious to her, and even bitter fruits sweeten with
sunshine. Yet she is ready to cry out in a racre of
disappointment, of days in which flv-trapping has°been
dull, and of evening watches when no senseless moths
have been abroad :

"Let that day be darkness, neither let the lights shine
upon It. As for that night, let darkness seize upon it."
Diligence m business has wrought as a soquel fervour
of spmt. This is the rational answer to the oft-repeated
y^^^yj-^ ^^y ^^°"^^ So-and-So care to rend the reputa-
tion ot Sv- ; >an-One who has done her no harm ? No act
IS moti\.:;c^;'.:'

Neit' f «ra our gossip's daily works and ways. By
degrees m^i .'}a8 learned the love of work for work's sake
bpying, tatthng, and detraction are the object of her life
bhe hunts her preserves with the keen nose and ardent
temper of your pointer when you take him a-field. Scent-
less stubble is her aversion.

Covert as is her watch ; and her presence betrayed to
the passer-by only in the accidental stir of a curtain, or
the flash of the diamonds on the finger inserted to widen
the peep-hole between the blinds, Mrs. Arachne Webb's
post and occupation are as much a matter of general
understanding as was the existent fact of the garment
allusion to whicH made Mrs. Wilfer blush for pert Lavvy'
and elicited Mr. George Sampson's agreeable smile, and—
After all, ma'am, we know it's there ! "

«.f^®^y^°o^ ^" *°^^ ^"°^« *hat Mrs. Arachne is
there. Saucy youths, in passing her door, hum, 8otto
voce :

'*' *' Will you walk into my parlour ? '
Said the spider to the fly."

OOSBIP.

281

nakes up " well

1th and social

?ive her. The

What moves

'or the passage

saven has been

sweeten with

in a rage of

Dping has been

snseless moths

he lights shine
3eize upon it."
sequel fervour
le oft-repeated
nd the reputa-
liarm ? No act

ad ways. By
•r work's sake,
ect of her life.
)se and ardent
a-field. Scent-

!e betrayed to
f a curtain, or
srted to widen
ichne Webb's
er of general
the garment,
>r pert Lavvy,
3 smile, and —

I. Arachne is
or, hum, sotto

Filmy threads of her spinning tangle in our eye-lashes,
tickle our noses ; even trip up the unwary and ' the
weak.

" She is a dangerous woman ! " wo say, wamingly, to
our young deople. " B( careful what you say to her."

Yet we all smile upon her in society, and call upor
at decorous intervals. Not quite certain whether sii. m
more dangerous as foe or as friend, we feel intuitively
that it is safer not to offend her. She is in delicate
health — so she gives out— suffering excruciatingly at
times from enlargement of the spleen. Whereat nobody
marvels and some smile bitterly in their sleeves. In
company, she affects sofa-comers, and shadowy, cozy
nooks, "not being strong" — say those who know no
better. Those who do, shun the gleaming eyes of the
still figure, and give the be- webbed retreat a wide berth.
For she spins most cunningly in such circumstances.
Butterflies on diaphanous wings float before her by the
dozen, giddy grasshoppers and droning bees, and she
selects her prey at her leisure.

" But," reason the incredulous, "a scandal-monger so
notorious can do no harm. Who, among sensible people,
will believe her tales ? "

Sensible Christians, by the score, do receive them in
full faith. Some, for the mere love of sensation, omit
this precaution. The scandal that comes smartly to the
jaded palate of the epicure in gossipry is generally ac-
cepted without demur. .

" I don't believe it, you know," thus the accomplice
drugs conscience. " But it is such a rich tit-bit that I
can not keep it to mysolf."

The next repetition will be without the qualifying
clause.

There is at once virile and conceptive power in scandal.
Nothing but the expulsive force of will and conscience
can rid th ^ mind of it.

The Psalmist prescribed heroic treatment in his day : —

■ i

,9l

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TEST TARGET (MT-3)

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■Sim 12.5

|io ■^" ■!■■
Ii£ Uii 12.2

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riiuiiuglajjniC

Sciences
Corporation

33 WEST MAIN STREET

WEBSTER, N.Y. 14580

(716)872-4S03

^J^

lEjU"^ <i^»

282

GOSSJP.

"Whoso privily slandereth his neighbour will I cut
off !

" What shall be given unto thee ? or what shall be done
unto thee, thou false tongue ?

"Sharp arrows of the mighty, with coals and juniper !"
That is : — excision and the moxa.

It I

!I !

i i ■

1-
1:

ibour will I cut
rhat shall be done
als and juniper!"

CHAPTER XXI.

PRINCE CHARMING. »

" My Beloved spake and said unto me—' Riae up, my love, my fair one

flnL^rT' *'^''^* &' ^"-i^" ^'^*^'^ •« P»»*' t^« ™'» is over anTgone : th^
flowers appear on the earth ; the time of the singing of birds is come.''

^Jn "^w^l: ^ ^orth Wind, and come, thou South ! Blow upon my gar-
den, that the spices thereof may flow out. Let my Beloved come into Ws
garden and eat his pleasant fruits. "-Son^ of Solomon.

It is only in fairy tales that Prince Charming has to
awaken a Sleeping Beauty. Far oftener the unmated
maiden climbs, with Sister Anne, to the watch-tower and
gazes horizonward for signs of the Coming Man— not for
love ot Fatiraa, but on her own extremely individual
account. Sometimes the cloud of sun-gilt dust is all that
rewards her eye from daydawn to twilight. Sometimes
It is a flock of scary sheep which she has mistaken for a
throng of wooers. Usually, however, if she is not over
nice m the choice of him who is to deliver her from the
tears of eternal spinsterhood, somebody appears, readv
to attempt the emprise. ^ rr- . j

This watch, and the varieties in the manner thereof
have been the theme of more satires and diatribes than
any other human failing, even among feminine foibles,
since the evening when " weak-eyed " Leah connived at
the paternal manoeu vers that gave her sister's intended
husband to her, as the eldest daughter. Poets have
idealized it tenderly ; cynics sneered viciouslv. nnd utili-
tarians baldly dissected it as a wise provision of Nature.

284

PRINCE CHARMING.

'if,

" Marriage is an incident to Man ; to Woman an Event "
IS graven, an irrefutable verity among the world's max-
ims. It is one of the decreasing store of apophthec^ms
that prove the unity of the human race. If the definite
article were sustituted for the indefinite before the last
word of the axiom, the universal belief on this topic
would be more fitly expressed.

It is not my purpose to depart so far from the ingenu-
ous tone I have preserved throughout this volume'as to
deny the justice of the world's verdict. The purest,
sweetest happiness which women can know this side of
Heaven, flows from a harmonious marriage. I have, not
admitted, but freely averred elsewhere in theso pa»es,
that husband, home, and children oflfer a sphere with
which the most ambitious of our sex may well be thank-
fully content.

With this preamble, I make way for a man's thoughts
on this head. Among the many extracts gratefully com-
piled for my use and the reader's profit, I insert few
more apposite and trenchant than an editorial that ap-
peared in the Springfield Republican, August 28, 1881
under the caption — " Uses for Women." '

The best use to which a woman can f ^t is to be
made the honest wife of some good man u, the judi-
cious mother of healthy children. All the art and learn-
ing that she can compass are not of so much value to
the world as the example of a life passed quietly in the
exercise of domestic duties and social righteousness, in
the gift to the country of children who shall carry' on
the national tradition of courage and generosity, of un-
selfishness and virtue.' — London Truth.

" This excellent suggestion is not new, but does it
never occur to the London Truth that if married life is
to be held up to woman as her true profession, man
ought to give her the social right of proposing marriacre
to the other sex? We submit that nothing can be
meaner in man than to assure woman kindly, calmly

PRINCE OHARMINO.

285

nan an Event,"
le world's max-
)f apophthegms
If the definite
^ before the last
' on this topic

om the ingenu-
lis volume as to
;. The purest,
ow this side of
e. I have, not
n theso pages,
a sphere with
well be thank-
man's thoughts
gratefully cora-
b, I insert few
iorial that ap-
igust 28, 1881,

■- it is to be
cv .,:. the judi-
art and learn-
much value to
quietly in the
jhteousness, in
shall carry on
erosity, of un-

r, but does it
married life is
•ofession, man
)sing marriage
thing can be
kindly, calmly,

and profoundly that her true place ia to be a wifeuand
then coolly, but tirmly, bid her yait for that opportunity
till some man condescends to ask her. Suppose nobody
ever asks her. Suppose a cruel fate has denied her per-
sonal charms or a dowry. Suppose, instead of ' some
good man ' presenting himself, she has a succession of
offers from men who, each and all, have such defects of
character that even no man would care to enter into
partnership with them. Must she take the risk— now
with a protiigate, now with a brute, or a selfish pig, now
with a spendthrift, now with an incapable who cannot
earn a living for one, much less for two, now with an old
man blas^ and invalid ? Truth's article, which begins
with the above-quoted sentences, has for its title ' man-
traps ; ' how about the ' woman-traps ? ' Who takes the
greatest risk in marriage and is most likely to appear as
a complainant in the divorce court ? Or suppose that
the London Truth's ' good man ' should turn up, and the
woman did not, would not and could not love him, or
finally, that on some general principle of feminine obsti-
nacy she didn't want to marry at all ? There are men
who do not choose to marry — cannot women also hon-
ourably choose not to marry ?

"And in any of these contingencies, some of them highly
probable, what is woman to do but earn her living in the
world by industries to which God has fitted her just as
peculiarly as He has man, and from which nothing ex-
cludes her but the mean prejudice and contemptible
patronizing philosophy of those who would shut women
up to domestic life with men not worthy of them ?

" Of course, abstractly what the London Truth says
about the ' best use ' of women is true, but it is no truer
of her than it is of man. The best use to which a man
can be put is being a good husband and raising good
children. To raise a perfect generation is the whole end
of civilization. But the Truth would not accept the same
sauce for goose and gander. Its vieWs of mamaMe is that
B

286

PRINCE CHARMING.

Uf.

it constitutes the profession of one sex, but not of the
other. This is degrading to both. It raises monstrosities
of complacent selfishness among men who regard that
woman as deficient in womanliness who does not look
upon a life-long partnership with ' some good man ' as a
sweet boon and the end of her being. The class is larger
in England than here who regard woman as made for
man, but not man for woman, and who feel that the only
way to insure the superiority of one sex to the other is to
distrust equality of opportunities and of educational ad-
vantages. This is the eflfect upon men; upon women, it
is diiasrent. It impresses giils with the idea that mar-
riage is necessary, and they fall into a foolish panic lest
they should ' get left.' These are the ones who get so
indecent in their struggle for matrimony that they set the
traps of which Truth complains. The prevailing no-
tion of society, which is that of the London Truth,
puts girls at a certain age in a pitiful fraAie of mind, which
is shared by their mothers. It is less so now than for-
merly, and girls now spend in educating themselves for
self-support some of the years which were formerly spent
in angling for husbands and worrying for fear they should
not get a bite. But many ill-starred marriages are con-
tracted now, in the face of great risks in the character of
the man, which would be saved if the young woman
were assured of independent position and was free to
reject or accept. Nothing has done so much to cultivate
domestic happiness in America as the elevation of woman
to an equality with man in educational advantages and
attainments and her consequent advantage as a contract-
ing party in matrimony. It elevates equally the single
woman whose social position was once deemed inferior to
her married sister's. It raises the standard of the home,
because it teaches that the perfect home is no less the
concern of man than of woman, and helps to correct the
conceit that man has outside of it any purpose in life
nobler or more important."

PRINCE CHARMINO.

287

the character of

I congratulate my reader and myself upon the perusal
of an article which adds another to the many prooft that
wise thoughtful men-,men y^ith hearts and\mins-^are
not our natural enemies. This sentence is not an absurd^
ity in view of the publication in one of ourtnost popular
inism of 1h? t"^'^^' "^"^ "P«" " TheNaTu^ffig!
refe^ed It hp^h?' "I? ^^^'^ '° "^^^^ ^ ^*^« ^efofe
fndo^pd W /r '" ektensively copied, and as generally
indorsed by the press, besides being largely quoted in
public and private speech, **'g«iy quotea in

According to this theory the Great Brotherhood of
Humanity would exclude the sisters. From oiJr child-

ITA7" r '^ " ^'T '^^y ^'^ '^' ^^Ives. During the
age of 'Pamela and " Amanda Fitz-AUan" the le|end

Eternal vigilance is the price of purity " should have
been inscribed upon the baby-girl's pap-Lp and botd
S Vr '^'"' '^' forehead%5id List of The
damse . In a very curious relic of that time much
conned by our grandmothers-" A Father's LeiaTy to
his Daughters; By Dr. Gregory "-we hapneTunon
numerous mdices of this peculfar Lte of sociZthics^
It you love him (i. e., the suitor), let me advise vou
never to discover to him the extent of your love no not
although you marry him. ... ' '^

" This is an unpleasant truth, but it is my duty to let
you know It-violent love can not subsisTat least cin
not be expressed for any time together, oA both sid^s
Nature, m this case, has laid the reserve on you "

The good Father, with " Allah-il-Allah » resignation

'"^f^'^lP'^'^^^i^T^^ *^« ^^il «t-ted be?or-- '
• ?^ ft® 5®"'''^ °^ l^^^i^g school until her mar-

S:fk sielf "'"T^^" generally little more thla
blank. She leaves school with expanded faculties hi^h
hopes, beating expectations, and a?dour of applicaS
but not a suitable object upon which to LS them'
Thus she wa^stes lofty thoughts and briilianrpurpose^*
and surprising powers on the dull earth or theS aS'

ill

288

PRINCE CHARMINO.

She seems like some glorious temple, beautiful in archi-
tecture, costly in ornaments, rich in splendour, and radiant
in light, but wanting a shrine upon which to burn in-
cense, and a God to adore."

Dr. Gregory and the London Truth man would frater-
nize lovingly, had the birth of the former been delayed a
hundred and fifty years. But Jeremiah or Calvin might
laugh at the imagination of the flidactic doctors devout
horror were Francis Power Cobbe to enunciate to his face
her proposition, " First, human beings, then women " ; or
the audacious writer in the Republican to oSqv his query,
" If marriage is to be held up to woman as her true pro-
fession, ought not man to give her tlie social i ight of pro-
posing marriage ? "

Note, please ! that ouf authors of To-day do not call us
"females." Also, that Dr. Gregory habitually, and
altogether innocently, does. This dissimilarity in the use
of terms tells the story of a century of progress. Men are
our brothers, and of our kind: not enemies or even
aliens.

" Indisputably ," says Charlotte Brontd's finest woman,
" Shirly," " a great, good, handsome man is the first of
created things."

Higher education for Woman does not unsex her, pro-
vided the cultivation of heart keeps pace with that of
mind. The habit of, and capacity for fine analysis of in-
stict and emotion, her insight of psychological and phy-
siological laws, ought to instruct in juster appreciation of
the meaning of Sex, the true and noble relations of Man
and Woman. She should comprehend that, in proportion
to the development of the best characteristics of each,
it become the couutex^art of the other, the accordant
Whole as God made it, "Man— in the image of God
created He him. Male and female created He them."

It is the figure of the broken coin, treasured by parted
lovers. If it be sacredly kept and carefully handled, the
severed edges unite without gap or ridged line after years
of separation.

PRINCE CHARMING.

289

iiful in archi-
ir, and radiant
1 to bum in-

would frater-
)een delayed a
Calvin might
lectors devout
iatetohis face
women " ; or
ffer his query,
her true pro-
1 light of pro-
do not call us
bitually, and
rity in the use
ess. Men are
mies or even

finest woman,
is the first of

insex her, pro-
with that of
analysis of in-
jioal and phy-
ppreciation of
iations of Man
in proportion
sties of each,
the accordant
mage of God
He them."
ired by parted
^ handled, the
ne after years

I would have you the more thorough in your m)man-
Imess for having been true to yourself. The firm, stately
poise of your character need not detract from the tender-
ness of your heart, the liveliness of your sympathies. It
IS right, also, that in these later years the silent side of
your being should be growing and perfecting. You will
cultivate the gentler graces of patience and unselfishness
the more assiduously for the thought that you are form-
ing and keeping yourself for another. I would never
tear from the girl's dreams and the woman's hopes the
Ideal Prince. Instead, I would encourage her to bring
herself up to the level of his excellence ; would have her
keep herself for him in all sanctity and entirety. I have
called this consecration of the Innermost your, "silent
side." Guard it from rude and heedless intrusion. The
badinage of mixed companies on this theme, the bandyintr
of jest and equivoque based upon Love, Courtship, and
Marriage, are sacrilegious handling of holy vessels not far
removed from the impiety of Belshazzar's Feast.

Have a jealous care of the purity of your Ideal
lest you , should be too ready to identify it with a
very commonplace Reality. Impatience, which we have
confessed is an essentially femenine trait ; imagination
and the longing for aflfection that, oftener than any
other feeling, absorbs every emotion into itself, press
the giri on to this catastrophy. With the zeal and in-
genuity of the fossil-hunter, who constructs in a me-
gatherium or Elephas primigenus from a single ver-
tegral joint, she, upon the discovery in the acquaintance
of a day of one characteristic of the Prince, hastens to in-
vest him with all loveliness and virtues pertaining to the
"bright particular" of her dreams. In a tremour of
ecstacy she arranges drapery and mask so adroitly as to
deceive herself— never anybody else— and falls down to
worship the image she has made. The annals ctfhuman
error may be challenged to produce a like number of cases
of equal and humiliating infatuation with those of this
kind that we witness about us daily.

ff fi

290

PRINCE CHABMINa

,1 ' I

Wh&t posamed her to marry that fellow ? " is a sin-
gularly expressive form of the familiar inquiry.

been through the roseate haze of an undeciplined fancy
the weaver ,s princely. " a sweet-faced man. a proper man
as one shall see m a summer's day. a most lovely, gen-
tlemanhke man." In the white light of the high moon of
Marriage Bottom's snout and ears loom up to a height

death '"^^^ ^""^^ *^'''' the blackness of

As a prime measure for averting this irremediable evil
I strongly commend the frank and courteous association'
at home and m general society, of young men and young
women. It is the girl who has known but few men
and received scanty attention from those few, who jumps
at her first offer. The , old, old story, however clumsily
told, is, in the novices ears, what Bottom's semi-human
bray was to Titania in her awakening after the iuice of

eyelids ^''^'''' ^''^"'" ^^^ t)een^squeezed upon her

" W hat angel wakes me from my flowery bed ? "

sighs the elfin queen.

Our girl mistakes the tumult of gratified vanity for a
worthier emotion. The delusion passes almost as swiftly
as did Titanias, but the disenchantment io life-lonj
sorrow. °

Miss Phelps has this exquisite touch of natural and most
femimne feeling in Avis's reverie, while other girls, with
J^^y^expectant faces," talked in her presence of love and

" It was pleaaant to remember that she was not un-
lovely or unlovable. Sometimes, when she sat before her
ea^el forecasting her fair future, she felt suddenly glad
with a downright womanish thrill, that she was so sure
ot the beauty and patience of her purpose ; that she was
not to live a solitary life because no other had been open
to her. Perhaps the ivoman does mt live for wlrnn tlie

PRINCE CHARMING.

291

^« 18 a sm-
uiry.

ciplined fancy,
, a proper man
it lovely, gen-
I high moon of
up to a height
9 blackness of

jmediable evil,
Js association,
en and young
but few men,
fv, who jumps
i^ever clumsily
s semi-human
3r the juice of
Bzed upon her

id?"

i vanity for a
ost as swiftly
b io life-long

ural and most
»er girls, with
36 of love and

was not un-
lat before her
iddenly glad,

was so sure
that she was
id been open
for wluym the

kingdoms of earth and the glory of them could blunt the
tooth of that one little poisoned thought."

It is the man. who has held aloof from manoeuvering
mammas and over-willing daughters, priding himself
upon his sagacity and invulnerability, that, in an un-
guarded hour, falls a dupe to the cheapest and coarscot
scheming.

Scorn — with disdain bom of genuine self-respect and
modesty — to look upon that man as a possible husband
whose attentions to you have never passed the limit of
common courtesy. Should he manifest a decided prefer-
ence for your companionship, keep heart whole and head
steady by the reflection that it is altogether possible that
he may like and admire as a friend a woman he has never
thought of marrying. I wish I could impress you with a
just idea of the comfort and profit such a friendship
would bring to you ; what a help and delight you might
be to the man who, not having been born your brother,
yet feels for you as for a sister. It is not derogatory to
you in any respect that he does not love you with that
utterly different sentiment which he should 'have for the
woman he woos for wifehood. You attract and hold one
set of his affections, she another. The fact does not argue
inferiority in either of you.

I am often asked — " Do you believe in the impossibility
of the existence of pure, disinterested friendship between
p. young man and a young w'u: an, neither of whom is
married or betrothed to anothei person ? "

As in my own existence ! I believe, likewise, that this
is oftener unmixed by alloy such as the clashing interests
of two women are apt to introduce into their intimacy
than wp, as women, are willing to acknowledge. There
is, on the part of the man, an element of protecting gal-
lantry ; on the girl's, of physical dependence, which har-
monize delightfully, giving to their association the charm
of romance without its dangers. One of the parties to
the compact is mellowed and refined in character and de-

I. ;
i It

Il4

S9S

PRINCE CHARMINO.

portment by the association, the other made stroutrerand
usually wiser,

" How, then, shall I know the Prince? " I hear in various
accents of perplexity.

Leave the watch-tower and set about the duties alreadv
appi)inted for head, heart, and hands. Banish dreaming
by doing until, in the fulness of time, the Prince knocks
of his own free will, at your door, and announces himself
m his proper character. Do not force Love's fruitage into
insipid niaturity. Still less suffer every chance comer to
handle the ripening peach to see if it will suit his royal
fancy, until the down is all gone before the rightful
claimant appears. So far as in you lies, meet all men
who deserve your courtesy upon the same plane of trra-
ciOMS civility. Keep yourseff heart-free long enough to
weigh well the recommendations of competing suitors
and— a harder task— keep yourself fancy-free until calm
reason assures you that he who asks for your best trea-
sure merits it upon other grounds than the accident of
his discoverjr of your superiurity to the rest of your sex
It M no sign that you ought to marry a man that he
wants to marry you.

He pays you a compliment by the application, and this
you should recognise gently and gravely, if you decline
the otter. Make him comprehend that it gives you pain
to reject an honest love, and, having definitely dismissed
the suit, keep hw secret. It is never yours unless he first
reveals it to others. Many women retain as faithful
fnends those who once sought them vainly in marriage

It IS vulgar and shameful that hosts of people, even in
refined society, are utterly incapable of imagining that a
woman can smile brightly and fearlessly in the face of a
man she likes heartily as a friend, but whom she has
never dreamed of as a possible suitor,— whom she would
never marry under the strongest importunity. The plums
that fall when the branches are slightly jarred are not
the soundest ones. New Jersey Iruit-growers spread

PRINCE CHAKMINO.

S98

cloths on the grass to catch these, and gathering them un

arvT '^tL""' *^- ^ '^ destroy. the^curculioVg^'^and
Jarvre Tl o nne. rich, swoet fruit with the bloom on is
picked by hani and gingerly, not to mar beauty and

Better, dear girls— oh, how much better— to keen the
unclaimed heart sound and true, rounded and frosTened

st.l«'l?f"^1/:^rr f/ ^'^"'^ ^"^ ^"'"^"ity. making of ^^^^^
single life all that God means it to be, when He m infin
ite wisdom withholds that which y^u fancy would If

hands A^'r^u!"' ^^'f ^"^° >^°"^ «^" presumiS
hands. A pitiable creature is she who lets youth and its
opportunities for good and for gladness glideTway wh e
she leans a strained ear against the door, hearkenir to
footsteps that pass her threshhold without halting Most
pitiable is^she who does violence to common serse^nature
purity, virtue-bv marrying one she would neve? have

?or the t fh«r;t ""f? '?■ 'H ^'^^ of v-omanhood but
ne^er marr^"' '' ^'^ ''' ^^'P ^^^^ " ^^-«« " ^^^ rrligU

. "Chance!" How I loathe the accepted phrase ' Ther«
18 no chance m the Universe ruled by God^ If the woTd
sigmhes room, time, occasion for work for Him and His
children, your hands may be worthily fil'ed whhout ou
raging your womanhood by selling yourself inlhrsham:

Choose as the partner of your heart, your home vour
hfe a good, sound, clean-hearted man, who loves youCd
wins your love by the development of tastes conaen?al
with yours; a man whom, as a"^ friend, you could efteem
and adniire were he the husband of aLther J'C 13"^
test that would shake a mere fancy into thin a r. B^slow
to believe yourself "in love." The realitv is « hp«.!*% Y

z'nZ::!:''t'- ''^^ p^ttingVitiL^^u'r^ou;

Zce-'-^T^l^. "^Tf' ?7? *^ °^' y«" ^°^« deeplv and
.mcei«y, IS tha nsk of aU that time can give you of bli'ss,

294

PBINCE CHARMING.

maybe of heaven's hopes as well, upon the utterance of a
dozen sentences — a speech not two minutes in length.

There are men and women who, without fault of their
own, are morally inhibited from matrimony. A transpar-
ent American affectation finds expression in the remark
of mothers and friends : —

" Of course, girls and young men in marrying think of
nothing beyond the happiness of the present. It never
occurs to them that there may be a generation following
this," etc., etc.

If this squeamish fiction had been less popular a century
ago, we of this generation would have a better " chance"
of long and useful lives. Girls and the men who woo them
are silly and selfish if they do not think of the possibi-
lities of inconvenience and discomfort in the household
consequent upon the ill-health of wife or husband ; the
prospect of early bereavement to one or the other ; the
more serious probability of transmitting disease to children
yet unborn.

Almost forty years since I hearkened while playing with
my doll to a conversation between several ladies who had
attended a wedding the previous evening. The bride was
beautiful and amiable, the groom a fine young fellow and
very much in love. The alliance was highly eligible, the
" occasion" gratifying.

" I am afraid she is very delicate," ventured one voice.
" Her father and mother both died of consumption, you
know."

The observation was like a chip tossed upon the current
of general approbation. The waves sucked it under and
out of sight the next second. Last week, walking in a city
cemetery I found it again — a fulfilled prophecy, empha-
sized by eight tomb-stones like glaring exclamation -points.
The nine children born to the happy couple, seven slept
with the mother under the daisies. She lived to see her
forty-sixth year. All of the seven daughters grew to wo-

PRIXCE CHARMING,

295

e utterance of a
)S in length.
lit fault of their
ay. A transpar-
L in the remark

irrying think of
3sent. It never
ration following

opular a century-
better " chance"
n who woo them
: of the possibi-
1 the household
r husband ; the
the other; the
jease to children

lile playing with
ladies who had
. The bride was
3ung fellow and
hly eligible, the

tured one voice,
fnsumption, you

ipon the current
;ed it under and
'alking in a city
'ophecy, empha-
laraation -points,
pie, seven slept
lived to see her
Lers grew to wo-

manVestate. Six died between the ages of twenty and
twenty-five of consumption.

The progeny of consumptives, or scrofulous or cancer-
ous parents, of a -succession of intermarriages of first
cousins, of insane persons when lunacy has been already
transmitted from more than a single generation or branch
ot the same family, have no right to make wretched other
and innocent lives. Let the curse die out in their un-
wedded persons.

In the firm resolve that this shall be so; in the pray-
erful desire to eliminate so far as in them lies that much
ot evil from the creation already groi .g and travailing
together in pam ; in the cheerful obedience through lone-
ly years to the Divine beckonings to duty and toil unso-
laced by the dearest of human loves,— herein is heroism
"^ T. • JIu ':^g,^*«o"s Judge of all will not fail to reward.
It is Ghristhkeness ; a true following of the Homeless
One who " pleased not Himself."

^^M^)

%f^

, ty

f !l

CHAPTER XXII.

MARRIED.

,t"J 5?7®'" ^° *° * bridal party that it does not almost break my heart."—
N. P. WiLUS.

" To repress a harsh answer ; to confess a fault ; to stop, right or wrong
m the midst of self-defense in gentle submission, sometimes requires u
struggle like life and death, but these three efiforts are the golden threads
with which domestic happiness is woven."— Caroline Gilman.

The old-fashioned novel always ended with marriage.
So strong is the influence of habit upon us that we satir-
ize now the sensational fiction that begins with the wed-
ding-day and enters, at the door-sill of Love-in-a-Cottage,
upon a series of misunderstandings, jealousies, and de-
spairs.

The pessimist philosopher affects to see grave signifi-
cance in this change of literary fashions. The Woman
Question, he broadly affirms, has wrought upon the femi-
nine mind until the wife is no longer content to merge
her individuality in that of her lord. She looks upon
marriage as one of a flight of steps by which she is to
aggrandize herself ; as a stage in evolution, not the per-
fected condition. In the grandly-simple old times, she
was the weak left hand — thus proceeds the illustration-
delicate in shape and colour, by reason of comparative
disuse, glorified by the wedding-ring that typified its
nearness to the heart. Shielded by the strong, sinewy
right hand that did life's work and dealt life's blows, the
feebler member was something to be loved and cherished.

■ ii

1 i

MARRIED.

297

lost break my Leart."-

A beneiicen\, Creator never intended that the Whole
Man, formed by the union of complementary parts,
should be ambidextrous. In this degenerating epoch,
Woman — to alter the figure — having struggled to her
feet, fights, like an unruly child, against him who would
bear her in his arms.

With a brief and, I hope, pertinent suggestion that He
who made hands and feet perhaps knew their uses better
' than do His interpretei-s, we will settle ourselves to a lit-
tle practical talk about your new state, its trials, its re-
sponsibilities, and its helplessness in lifting you to a
higher plane of thought and feeling.

Allow me to assume, if you please, that you love yoxir
husband with affection which, from the moment you laid
your hand in his at the altar, shut out the possibility of
ever feeling the same, while he lives, for any other man.
A loveless marriage is an unchaste union. This is a hard
saying in some ears, but it is as true as there walk on our
streets thousands of women who live by the illegal viola-
tion of the seventh commandment. She who shrinks in
positive physical repugnance from the lover's kiss ; who
feels no drawing towards him beyond the cordial liking
she experiences for several others ; who sickens at the
imagination of the constant companionship of wedded life
— may remain, while single, his warm, aftectionate friend.
If she marries him in defiance of maidenly instinct, she
becomes mistress not wife. No considerations of wordly
policy, no amount of parental influence, not all the bless-
ings of stoldd priest and the applause of those who com-
mend the " excellent match," can change the character of
the sin. The connection is unnatural, impure, and unsafe.
The chained heart, the outraged instincts are ever liable
to break into open rebellion. These are the wives who
have platonic adorers and devoted cicisbei. Into the
secret of their loathings and their loves pray that your
soul may never enter.

298

MASRIED.

• Before marriage," we read it in the Spectator, " we
can not be too inquisitive and discerning in the faults of
the person beloved, nor after it, too dim-sighted and super-

The usually witty-wise essayist might apply the con-
cluding brace of adjectives to his own adage. People
with sound eyes must, of necessity, discover faults upon
near inspection which had been hidden up to that time
more by the comely usages of etiquette than through a
deliberate desire to deceive. The husband may, with the
incurable Tzawe^e of his sex, be the first to indicate that
he IS disenchanted. The wife, if reasonably quick-witted
feels it first, however well she may conceal her suspicions
and then her conviction. If very youthful, very passion-
ate, or very silly, she resents, secretly or outwardly
the intermission of the worship that has throughout the
courtship idealized her into forgetfulnes » of her identity
with the girl she was before love became her life.

It is a shock to her— to you, my lately-wedded audi-
tor- to see your bridegroom put on his every-day coat
on the mormng after your return from the bridal tour
and whistle himself down-stairs to breakfast " justas if he
were not a married man ! " It is an affront that he buries
himself for as much as ten minutes behind the newspaper
although he may preface the deed by an apology and
"only wants to glance at the telegraphic column, or the
stock-list, or the something else that is sure to be there
a grmnmg imp of discord that defies you from the damp
sheet. He will never know— he never ought to guess
how many tears you shed in the first quarter of the first
year during which you bear his name. You wonder if he
really loves you— if he ever loved you, when he can take
such lively mterest in a world that is all changed to you
You dread lest you are losing your hold on his affections
when he unluckily forgets the commission entrusted to
him with the "Good-bye "kiss at the morning ieave-
takmg. And when at a party to which you couid not

MARRIED,

299

accompany him— say, a club-supper-he overstays the
hour set for his return, because he " fell into talk of old
times— or politics— with some of the fellows, and really
never suspected how time was passing," vou walk the
floor m an agony of desolation and compose your own
epitaph in bitterness of spirit, dwelling especially upon
the clause—" First Wife of John—" *" ^

Men make very merry over these episodes of early
married life I can not-any more than I can amuse

^^1^ r^^.^^®''''''^ ^"*^ baseless terrors of a weeping
child. Marriage is such a momentous affair, such a por-
tentous A 1 to us that we tremble at the remotest menace
ot peril which may wreck hope and heart. The folly of
your fears consists in exaggeration of their caus^. The
wme ot your husband's happiness settles sooner upon its
lees than does yours. Accustomed to contemplate the
actualities of Life, with critical note of their value: to
Keep the emotional part of his nature out of the sight of
the associate.-? of business hours,— in adjusting the machin-
ery of the day into the old running order, he fashions his
demeanour accordingly, with never a dream that you
object to the resumption of his former routine If he
does not spend hours in swearing how dearly he loves
you and how willingly he would die for vou, he proves

A i,T/J'v*^ "^'S^^y "'^^®^* «i^e" of his nature by
redoubled diligence in the calling that is to bring comfort
and beauty into your sheltered nest,— to make that shel-
tersure. Do not be guilty of the frightful mistake of
being jealous of his devotion to business; the business
tor which you care so little, but which stands with him
tor respectability, honour, wealth,— the happiness of wife
and children. Regard it, indeed, as the " chance " the
father has given him to do a man's work in the world

c. ?P ?^°^ *° ^^ ^^ *° *^® "^'"O'^^ of your ability.
bt;.idy hiH profession or craft in general principle and
aetail, until you can converse intelligently with him of

;

300

MARRIED.

the schemes that engage his brain and hands. Encourage
him to " talk out " his cares and worries before you try-
to soothe them. Extract the splinter before applying the
salve. W^hen the heart of your husband can safely trust
in you m this sense no less than in the keeping of his
honour, you have bound him to you by ties that will out-
last beauty and sprightliness. Better lose his affection
than his respect.

I want you to re-read that sentence and study its mean-
ing. If more wives acted upon the pregnant lesson it
conveys we should have fewer careless husbands — care-
less in talk of women and in the practice of domestic
virtues.

As you are your husband's standard of wifely fidelity,
be also his criterion of purity of language and thought.
Elevate, not commonize, his estimate of womanhood.
Show, by silent gravity, that whatever approximates
ribald talk distresses you. In becoming your mate in the
nearest and tenderest relation of the human species, he
should be more, not less, the gentleman than when as a
gallant, he was the pink of courtesy. From the day your
Lares and Penares are installed, let the gospel of conven-
tionalities be established likewise as the rule of your
household. Dress, talk and keep the house for him as
carefully and tactfully as for a stranger. Do not make
him boorish or awkward by reserving the gentler forms of
address, the fine linnen and best china for visitors. Un-
less he is exceptionally au fait to traditional by-laws of
social usage, you are better informed on such subjects
than he. Initiate him into these minor graces of polite
society gradually and ingenuously, with no appearance of
schooling or dictation. This is an undertaking requiring
much wisdom, or rather finesse. If John has not been
reared in the house with his mother and sisters, he will
be rough in seeming to your finer perceptions. He will
probably have " ways."

I knew of an else irreproachable spouse who, having

MARRIED,

301

dg. Encourage
before you try
re applying the
an safely trust
keeping of his
s that will out-
e his affection

study its mean-
jnant lesson it
usbands — care-
ce of domestic

wifely fidelity,
e and thought.
I womanhood.

approximates
our mate in the
aan species, he
,han when as a
n the day your
jpel of conven-

rule of your
ise for him as

Do not make
entler forms of
visitors, Un-
nal by-laws of

such subjects
graces of polite
I appearance of
king requiring
I has not been
sisters, he will
ions. He will

e who, having

been born and reared up to the date of his entering col-
lege, upon a farm, would, after he became a successful
lawyer and a city householder, insist upon washing his
hands at the kitchen sink when he came home to lunch
each noon. Servants stared and tossed contemptuous
heads ; his wife kindly expostulated and good humour-
edly ridiculed the practice. He " liked to be free-and-
easy in his own house," and each day marched straight
from the front door through the handsome hall, into the
back entry, and so into the kitchen. There he washed
face and head under the cold water faucet, scrubbed his
hands with yellow soap, wiped them on the roller towel,
consulted the thermometer in the rear hall, and presented
a smiling, satisfied countenance in the dining-room. The
wife writhed in secret and pondered long. A woman's
house is her kingdom, its decencies and proprieties as
precious in her sight as national integiity to an upright
ruler. The behaviour of the master was a palpable mis-
demeanour, yet he would neither acknoWiedge nor abate
the nuisance.

Finally, during his absence from town, she had a sta-
tionary wash-stand, with hot and cold water pipes, set up
under the window in the back entry ; a roller-towel rack
screwed upon the wall at one side, and hung a new large
combination of barometer and thermometer on the other.
The arrangement was " a great convenience for the child-
ren when they came in from school " she showed her lord
on his return. It was called, "the children's wash-stand,"
bu*^^ in less than a month their father, uninvited, halted
there habitually to " look at the thermometer," and in an
absent-minded way, washed his hands in the convenient
bowl.

Nevertheless, do not " manage " your husband when
fair and open means will serve your end. The sweetest-
tempered man will revolt at the suspicion of wheedling
and strategy. He may admire your cleverness, but he
will not love and trust you the more when he detects

302

MARRIED.

your wiles. Above all, never play upon his tenderness
for you in order to accomplish a given purpose. State
your wishes frankly and pleasantly ; urge them by a show
of your reasons for expressing them, and, if denied, bear
the disappointment bravely.

Never nag ! The inability of women to let sleeping
dogs lie is only surpassed by the teasing tenacity with
which they will twit a man with some trifling sin of
omission, and bore him by begging for a coveted good he
can not supply if he would, would not if he could, and
should not grant if he would and could.

The solemn dignity of Holy Writ is never degraded by
sarcastic comment from those who held the pen. Yet we
wonder how — being men of like passions with our hus-
bands, they refrained from marginal annotations against
such passages as these : —

" And she wept before him the seven days while tlie
feast lasted, and it came to pass on the seventh day, that
he told her, because she lay sore upon him."
And again, in the same narrative :
" And it came to pass when she pressed him daily with
her words and urged him so that his soul was vexed unto
death, that he told her all his heart."

Poor, soft-hearted, big-limbed giant ! How could he
help it ?

Be too proud and too honourable to owe to tedious
rasping with a file that which you cannot get at with
honest keys. When you cannot win your husband's
acquiescence in your schemes by a fair exposition of your
views, yield gracefully and let him alone.

I speak here of affairs that do not inyolve moral or
religious principle. No human being has the right— no
human law can endue him with the authority to legis-
late for another's conscience, when in opposition to his
decree, that other can plead—" Thus said the Lord ! "
You may not sin in word or deed, or temporize with
sacred duties, even at your husband's behest. You be-

MARRIED.

303

his tenderness
irpose. State
bem by a show
f denied, bear

to let sleeping

tenacity with

trifling sin of

veted good he

he could, and

r degraded by
pen. Yet we
with our hus-
lations against

ays while tlie
enth day, that

■im daily with
las vexed unto

[ow could he

we to tedious
t get at with
)ur husband's
sition of your

:olve moral or
the right — no
ority to legis-
)osition to his
I the Lord!"
imporize with
est. You be-

longed to God before you belonged to him. Our refer-
ence is to the numerous subjects of discussion brought to
the surface by the ordinary course of family life ; — the
ordering of household machinery, personal expenses,
social obligations and the like. Define your desires on
these points, and if these are combated, calmly and cour-
teously explain what you consider are your rights. After
this, — I repeat — if one or the other mmt give up, let it
be yourself.

The masculine idea of mutual concession is aptly
given in the anecdote of the man who, in urging the
wisdom of conciliatory measures in the married state,
told of his first and only open quarrel with his wife.

" When we were furnishing our house she wanted
crimson furniture, and I blue. We wrangled pretty
hotly for a while, butjat last, we compromised on the
hlu€. Since then, we have gotten along swimmingly
together."

The rule I have reiterated is a safe one. I do not say
there is justice in it, but to suflTer wrong meekly is pre-
ferable to continual bickerings and heart-festers. Mag-
nanimity becomes a noble soul better than selfish triumph.
When inclined to be severely critical of your spouse's de-
fects, let me — speaking out of the depths of personal ex-
perience — recommend as palliative, if not cure of your
uncharitableness, a judicious course of introspection.
Examine yourself for an hour with his eyes,— judge your
foibles by a man's tests — and forgive him !

All these are petty troubles; at their worst but
wi'inklesin the lining of the shoes so lately fitted to your
feet. You will get used to them, or time will wear them
flat and smooth if you will be patient. You will ignore
them when you reflect upon what are the actual sorrows
of wedded life. Perhaps it would be more strictly cor-
rect to drop the plural here.

True, some husbands are drunken and dishonest and
brutal. But so are some fathers, and t^eir daughters suf-

4 ■ I

304

MARRIED.

I s

f ' 1

fer as keenly in and for them as wives do on account of
their partner's disgrace and cruelty. The law interferes
in the extremity of either case. Marital infidelity is a
sin and a woe, sui generis. The anguish of the woman
who is conscious that she has been thus sinned against
may well appeal in the exceeding sorrowfulness of the
cry:—

" Is it nothing to you, all ye that pass by ? Behold and
see if there he any sorrow like unto my sorrow which is
done unto me ? "

Women live through it, and their most intimate friends
hear nothing of it ? Yes ! because they must ! It has
driven more to madness, to suicide, to desperate destruc-
tion of their own souls than all other goads combined. I
wish I could assure you with truth, loving young wife,
that the crime is rare. I would exchange years of my own
life, if I could, to regain the faith in the general practice
of the virtues of constancy and continence which was
mine at your age. Having been reared in a quiet GoD-
fearing community where married flirts were not con-
sidered respectable, and known violations of marriage-
vows were banned as criminal, I have sustained a long
series of disagreeable shocks at the sight of the growing
tolerance, or apathy with respect to these that has almost
reduced transgressions to peccadilloes.

Two truths are incontrovertible. The undivided alle-
giance of your affections and life is due to him to whom
your nuptial-vow was plighted, " until Death do you part."
And if ever a rule should work both ways, this ought. It
is the ordinance of God and your heart adds, " Amen ! "

Do not be easily or hastily persuaded that your hus-
band is untrue to you, however appearances may assert
this. The felt need of recreation is more manifest in man
than in woman, probably because his studies are severer,
his seasons of consecutive labour more arduous. Our work,
if " never done," has little breaks here and there. We can
slip in half an hour's chat, an hour's walk, dip for five

on account of
law interferes
infidelity is a
)f the woman
inned against
ulness of the

? Behold and
rrow which is

iimate friends
lust ! It has
?rate destruc-
combined. I
young wife,
irs of my own
[leral practice
e which was
a quiet GoD-
'■ere not con-
of marriage-
;ained a long
■ the growing
lat has almost

divided alle-
iiim to whom
do you part."
his ought. It
, " Amen ! "
it your hus-
s may assert
nifest in man
3 are aeverer,
s. Our work,
lere. We can
, dip for live

MARRIED.

305

minutes into a restful book, and catch ten minutes' doze
in the " betweenities." When office and warehouse are
shut at evening, the workman and his employer are mas-
ters of their time until next morning. The weight is
lifted entirely, and the rebound of a healthy nature is
strong. The released toiler wants amusement, and of a
more decided flavour than the mild refreshment which
satisfies you. So in the vacations, of which you know
experimentally little after your graduation. You may not
comprehend the relish for boating, fishing, hunting bil-
hards, travelling, or whatever other form his hobby' may
assume. If you are a sensible woman, you will tolerate
It to the full. If a loving wife, you should simulate the
sympathy you do not feel— not only because John is the
happier for the harmless diversion, but because he will
work better and live longer for it. I have seen many a
man soured into moroseness, many a good fellow spoiled
mto a machine for money-making, because the presiding
genius of his home derided his sporting fancies, frowned
on his post-prandial cigar, criticised and snubbed the
friends of his bachelorhood, and put her foot down— me-
taphorically, at least— upon riding-horse and pointer
"Love me, love my dog," is undoubtedly a masculine
dictum.

Have charity, moreover, for John's enjoyment in the
company of a bright jirl. That he jests with her, seeks
her m public assemblies, discusses books and current
events with her in a serious corner, that he wants you
to become the friend of "one of the most charming
women he has met in an age "—so far from being prima
pcie evidence of his disaflfection to you, is almust pos-
itive proof that the whole afTair is as innocuous as a glass
of iced soda-water. He might know and meet her
weekly for fifty years without endangering your place
in his affections. He mav boldlv protest that h« is
" very fond of her," and mean all he says, and love
you the more truly for liking one who ministers to his

1 ?i

306

MARRIED.'

innocent pleasure. Illicit love does not assume'this guise
so often as to be recognised by such signs as I have de-
scribed.

Should you unhappily discover that your husband visits
clandestinely and frequently one whom he seldom names
to you, and then carelessly or slightingly ; that letters pass
regularly between the two which are kept out of your
sight ; that the stolen glances and shy avoidance of the
semblance of intimacy in public are like the manoeuvres
of a pair of secretly-betrothed lovers— you have the right
to know what it means. As the best friend of the indis-
creet or erring man, it is your duty to speak openly of
your fears and warn him of the danger to your happiness
and his reputation arising from his imprudence. * That
you may perform this duty aright, summon the aid of
philosophy, good sense, and religion to support you in
the ordeal. Restrain so f:»r as you can the exhibition of
violent jealousy. Plead earnestly and lovingly, not an-
grily. In losing command of your temper you put your-
self in the wrong forthwith,*and lose by so much the
weight of a just cause. Should your remonstrance be
ineffectual, take up the heavy cross appointed for you to
carry, and ask of the tender pity of the Father daily
grace to live. Do not descend to espionage and adroit
snares for the detection of the guilty parties. As I have
said, better lose love than respect. Moreover, a wife thus
situated can do nothing to arrest the evil. The utmost
she can accomplish is to teach her sinning lord superior
cunning in the prosecution of his liaison, wii'L' Tvidening
the gulf between her and himself, or precip'fctit '.. -lay
of discovery in the which her name as liuked \/itu his
will be tarnished.

Some of the grandest women I have ever seen have

grown in depth of feeling and mind into heroines — in

Christian graces into stantliness, under thi& crucial dis-

.7>l'-.3. It briiigs out the best as the worst of a wife. It

ii <: *ecf i ed article of belief with roiies that she who

MARRIED.

307

iime'this guise
as I have de-

liusband visits
seldom names
lat letters pass

out of your
idance of the
le manoeuvres
lave the right
1 of the indis-
!ak openly of
our happiness
[lence. That
tn the aid of
pport you in
exhibition of
ngly, not an-
^ou put your-
80 much the
lonstrance be
3d for you to
Father daily
fe and adroit
i. As I have
r, a wife thus

The utmost
lord superior
iile T^idPTiing
ktitt ".. ''ay
ied v/itii his

er seen have
heroines — in
I crucial dis-
)f a wife. It
hat she who

doubts her husband's faithfulness to her, is already half
won ly another. The women of whom this may hh pre-
dicted .i; e vastly outnumbered by the noble army of mar-
tv'S wlt'> tor the sake of their children and of society,
ohrough the might of a love that can not be wholly with-
dr.vv n from the unworthy object, live in their husbands'
homes loyal wives and dumb victims, and, by the subli-
mity of their devotion, silence scandal itself — almost
redsem the names they boar from the disgrace of others'
misdeeds.

Of whom the world is not worthy ! My spirit bows in
unspoken homage in the presence of a wronged wife who
yet makes no open sign of her desolation.

I said as much the other day to a good man, a gallant
Christian, who loves and honours the wife of his choice.
I added, furthermore : —

" I hold fast to the old-fashioned belief in the one-ness.
the absoluteness of the marriage-tie — the love and fide-
lity of one man toward one woman, and that woman his
wife."

He shook his head doubtfully :

" Ah ! that is because you are a woman !"

So be it !

CHAPTER XXIII.

M- !

:•!

ill

SHALL BABY BE ?

^wlJ^""® ^^ *mu®*!'y *'^®?^ ^^ *" °^^ civilization on the fertility of the
abler classes. The improvident and unambitious are those who chiefly keep
up the breed. So the race gradually degenerates, becoming with each sue?
cessive generation less fittea for a high civilization, although it retains th^
external appearance of one. "-Francis Dalton, " Bereditafy GerZs."

Al!ZI**!.^*fA''¥'^'*^f u""*^ between the America of Washington and the
America of Andrew Johnson, may be greatly traced to the immigration of
old days consisting of Cavaliers and Pilgrim Fathers, and the recent immi:
gratjon being made up of Irish cottiers and German boors, and loose or Mi-
minal tugitives from everywhere."- W. K. Greg, " Enigmas of I^fl"

If the American nation— as such— is to maintain a
continued and vigorous existence, it is by and through
the birth of American infants. These must be borne by
American women. Upon the bodily, moral, and intellec-
tual health of the parents of this generation, depends the
quality of that which is to follow it in close succession.
^ These are the principles of political economy formulated
in varying terms by prominent sociologists and physiolo-
gists of our times, but generally commended by them to
the consideration of the sterner sex,— perhaps upon the
supposition that every good citizen is master in his own
house. This course may have had a reasonable excuse at
a date when women, particularly wives and mothers
declared their indifference to politics and were vain of
their ignorance of the difference between " polity " and
"policy," and the leading questions of the most exciting
Presidential canvass. Now, when the cr;jr for women's

SHALL BABY BE ?

309

suffrage is waxing loud and yet more loud.-when the
gentlest belle has " opinions," and thrifty housewives de^
claim against taxation without representation, it is absurd
for us to feign irresponsibility. ««*usura

Sweeping aside dust and cobwebs with one stroke of
our Common Sense besom.-ridding the vexed question
of sophistry, special pleading and thl vituperation wh ch

bolX wwT''""^1 ^^^'t ^'' argument Jet us take up
boldly what slang calls " a bottom fact " ^

Is it not that women want to vote, but are not willing
to make vo ers ? That with an impatience that shor ens
sight and dizzies judgment they account a seat on the

Sr tlT. ''' *^'\T ^^ '.^^^ ^^^ ^'^'^ «^°r« honourable
than the power behind it ? That policy is not nnlv

short-sighted, but ignoble which sacrFficesVe great and
prospective good of the many to the present agfrandize-
" T 1 ^/^tr^ i^' individual man or woman.
1 snail be able to have my own way during mv life-
time," says Louis XV.. vicious and imbecile. " BuU pUv
my grandson ! ' , uu x yiiy

The painted harridan at his side was ready with thp
bon mot that has won infamous notoriety ^

" Apres notes le deluge I"

The "strong-minded" woman accepting the social
vantage-grounds of wif^ ood, but proLting positTvX
against the mcumbran . of a family that woSld clog hlr
efforts m behalf of the emancipatioi of her sisters and the
elevation of humanity, echoes with all the mute force of
example the sentiment of La Pompadour She and her
guild are toiling in the blocked-u^p door-way'o? Jhe
Augean stables with reformatory spade and rake and

theT' 'Vtf '^^""^ '^^'^ best^to conduct agains?

that wnnM ^l ^ f''^"^ i ^'^''' '^'^'^Ser humanity
that would make clean work of the premises in a sin0^«

generation. When in every AmericanVousehold 1:^0^!

heit^ n '" -^1 ""^ ^T' "'y'' ^^'^"^^ "^ body and clean of
heart,-of girls as brave, as sensible and as sound, get-

■ ■

810

SHALL BABY BE?

ting ready to take their places in the land soon to be
vacated by those whose faces are already turned toward
the sun-setting, — we may hear, without a fearsome thrill,
thetale that through oneport alone, there is debouched daily
upon our land a flood of fifteen hundred foreigners. This
incoming tide is composed, according to our English wri-
ter : " of Irish cottiers, German boors, and loose or cri-
minal fugitives from everywhere."

The same Great Heart says elsewhere : — " I am not pre-
pared to give up this life as a ' bad job ' and to look for
reward, compensation, virtue and happiness solely to
another. I distinctly refuse to believe in inevitable
evils. I recognise in the rectification of existing wrong
and the remedy of prevailing wretchedness the work
which is given us to do. For this we are to toil and not
to toil in vain."

Our grandmothers bore many children. Not — fairness
obliges me to say — in obedience to the lofty sense of duty
I would inculcate as the lesson of this chapter, but be-
cause they CQuld not help themselves, and had an impres-
sion, based upon some unwritten moral law, that it would
not be right to prevent it if they could. The pains and pen-
alties of fertility were no lighter for them than their
granddaughters. In fact, they were far heavier. The
advance of medical science in the branch of obste-
trics has been vast during the past century. The " sacred
primal curse " of theirsex was reckoned a very curse, and
endured with shame and loathing. But — " Wives, sub-
mit yourselves unto your own husbands," stood out in
threatening relief upon the Statute Book, and as rendered
by them was not to be evaded. " Another ! " groaned
gossips in concert, when a tenth or eleventh olive-shoot
was added to a neighbour's responsibilities. And — " She
ought to be thankful, poor thing ! " when an infant came,
still-born, into the world where it was not wanted.

But the little ones continued to make their appearance
upon a mundane stage, too fast in many homes for their

SHALL BABY BE ?

311

i^ery curse, and

own good and the mother's strength, and by a merciful
law of Divine husbandry, the weaker plants were often
transplanted to a Nursery where neglect and mistakes are
impossible. These were mourned in all sincerity. It
was a saying then as now that the " little things bring
their love with them." Mothers reared the survivors
wisely— according to their lights ; enjoyed their youth
and in their own old age were comforted by their dutiful
offices. With the march of other rsforms, "Women's
Rights " fell into line.

" We are men's equals and will be owned by them as
such,' was the first platform.

When this was granted— with a T.^w reasonable limita-
tions— by the major part of masculine humanity, came,
" In all things save cultivated brute force we are your
superiors. We claim your homage."

The easy-tempered among those whom we— not they—
assume are our opponents, shrug their shoulders, and let
the case go by default.

" Give them their own way, and they will live the
longer, is their motto. And they make light of it, going
thevr ways, one to his farm, another to his merchandise
The pugnacious make a stand, harking back to St Paul
and even to Abraham and Sarah—" Whose daughters ye
are so long as ye do well and are not afraid with any
amazement." ^

(The New Version has it, " not put in fear bv anv
terror. ) J J

Weak men who can not hold their own with their
proper sex, and unballasted radicals train with the band
of seditious women ; accept offices in their societies add
bass voices to the shrill clamour for " uncontrolled en-
tranchisement."

This hubbub is folly and beneath the dignity of genu-
ine womanhood We .are not rebellious serfs, and it may
be safely affirmed that whenever we have proved our-

I 't

I ;i|

312

SHALL BABY BE?

selves capable of filling any position with honour to it and
to us, there have not been wanting true, magnanimous
. men, ready with their meed of praise to encourage us in
the venture. It is when the feet of clay appear beneath
sacerdotal or queenly vestments that they sneer — as they
should. We do not usurp the functions of men when we
develop and employ to the best advantage the intellectual
faculties we enjoy in common with them. We do at-
tempt this asinine feat by feigning ourselves to be sexless
beings fitted by their deformity for the work appointed
to the entire race, and eager to undertake it. "Always
excepting that part of it which men can not perform, to
wit, the bearing, the nursing, and the rearing of those who
are to carry on the work of the species in years to come.
Is this bald — unwomanly — is it non-progessive talk ?
To what other delusion shall we then attribute the rapid
and steady decline in the number of children born of
American parents, and the equally notorious fact that this
is most marked in what are known as our "better
classes " ? Are we, after all our boast of superior physi-
cal culture, feebler and more cowardly than those who
gave birth to our parents, or than our parents themselves ?
Are we Malthusian converts who fear to swell the popu-
lation of our half -peopled continent beyond the capacity
of the land to furnish subsistence for the teeming multi-
tudes ? Or, are we so intensely and secretly conscious of
our mental and moral defects that we dare not perpetuate
them in our offspring ?

Bear with me while we come to closer quarters in this
disquisition.

Briefly and directly, we may refer the objections of
young njarried couples to the birth of children to them-
selves to certain causes : —

First (and most respectable of all) the dread of trans-
mitting organic diseases to the next generation. The like
scruple should have kept the afflicted person single. He
or she has no right to write another " childless " ; to force

SHALL BABY BE ?

313

iionour to it and
i, magnanimous
encourage us in
appear beneath
sneer — as they
f men when we
the intellectual
m. We do at-
es to be sexless
vork appointed
ie it. Always
not perform, to
ng of those who
years to come,
'ogessive talk ?
ibute the rapid
ildren born of
is fact that this
s our "better
superior physi-
han those who
ts themselves ?
well the popu-
id the capacity
teeming multi-
ly conscious of
not perpetuate

uarters in this

! objections of
Idren to them-

Iread of trans-
ion. The like
n single. He
3SS " : to force

upon that one an unmerited burden. If, however this

Z17 tI f ^r^' *^.^ '""°^^ ^^°"g ^ill not make it
right. The further evil of diseased progeny should be
avoided by periodical continence ^ ^

Second Doubt as to the ability of the parents to main-

LTeeTat ilaT" ^'''"" *'^" '''' ^^^^^^^ ^-^' ^

rhj?ri^'%if-^"^'''^''l^,P^°''^^^ P^^^' who had thirteen
children of his own is indignant with the faithless father
who can not trust the Lord for the board and clothes of
those He sends. He is nearer the truth than the verv-
far-seeing ones who rival « Clever Alice " of German folk-
lore m their prevision of possible calamity. It is to be

l^tZ ^^ *^lf '"'' ^^>^" ''^^^^'' h^d not included
«?• t !i .u '?",^ *^^ contingents of matrimony, and
shirked the risk. It is a greater pity that, peering into
the dim recesses of the far future, they had not espild the
miseries of a desolate old age in the which the riches they
have pawned their soul to obtain will mock their loneli-
ness and be a tempting lure to swarms of greedv time-
servers, impatient for their decease and the accruing lega-

fl, JJ'll^'''"''^ ^' *^? ''*'''^'' ^°" ^^^^^ »°d "leaner scruples
than the apprenension of want or privation on the part of
the dear litt e improbables. Childless people get rich

Ltftwfr'. ^"^"'^^'r^^^" '^^'^ /ho have more
mouths to feed, more backs to clothe, It is customary

with these long-headed philanthropists to limit their con-
tributions to the world's population to one. or, at most
two specimens of their kind, who usually carry out the

r^rnl. r^ ^^^ ^y ^u^^^"^ "P ^"^° ««Jfi«h ^"d narrow
men and women. There is no better educator of the
attections and generous graces than a large family He
Jn^ulZt ™ "^^^ ^f?^tance so fonuly that he can not
endure the prospec. of lessening his hoard bv dividin<r it
with his babes, IS not likely to beget a large-souled h"eir
or to rear hini in the practice of the nobler virtues

314

SHALL BABY BE ?

■.I

;

1 1 <- '

Third. People "hate to be troubled with children,"
The husband of this class would " hate " the annoyance
of an ailing wife. The wife would account an invalid
husband a nuisance, and is not ashamed to avow that her
weak nature recoils with horror inconceivable from the
inconveniences of pregnancy and child-birth pain. Each
is essentially selfish — a lover of fleshly ease, and so in-
capable of appreciating the privilege of paternity, the
sweet dignity of motherhood, that I'emonstrance would be
ineffectual even did we not recognise the beautiful fitness
of letting theirs remain, in the blunt phrase of England's
virago queen, " a barren stock."

A sketch in an illustrated paper — Harper's Weekly, I
think — showed up a wife of this kind most graphically a
while ago. She sat, bare-armed and bare-necked, in
her opera box, toying with a lorgnette, while a mus-
tached exquisite whispered in her ear. In the back-
ground hovered an angel offering an infant to the wed-
ded pair. The husband's gesture besought the wife's
notice and her acceptance of the proffered blessing.
Her unoccupied hand waved it away disgustfully. Un-
demeath was written-, " Suffer not little children to come
unto Me ! "

There is something awry in the sensibilities, or off the
balance in the brain of the wedded woman who, although
moderately healthy and not actually poor, deliberately
elects never to be a mother. So firm is my conviction of
this, so deep my abhorrence of the " preventives " com-
monly resorted to in order to escape the menaced danger,
that I would fain ascribe the sins of young wives in this
regard to ignorance, to thoughtlessness, or to the influence
of bad counsels. They have not been educated up to the
appreciation either of their duty or the exceeding great
reward that will attend the performance of it. They do
.not know (how should they, never having been taught ?)
that the husband will be the dearer, home the richer, the
world wider and more full ; their own souls be renewed

I !

SHALL BABY BE?

316

fulfil this one of the

^S ^°T^^ V their consent to
i^ather's appointments.
The word " consent " is used advisedly.

.,•0 •■ *rt7^ *^V' ""'^^^ *^« remark of "a genial physi-
cian in the Massachusetts Medical Society " •- ^ ^

PPrfoL^ '^°'''^^ 'T ^ "^^^ *° ^^«^^« on any question, it
certainly IS as to how many children she shJll bear"

J^c^Ti,-^"'?*^?^ P^^® °^*^® «a°^e chapter, Dr. Napheys
issues this significant caution :— ""-pxieys

a<.l'in,t Tt^T "'' ^t '"'^'"".^ ^'J *^" "^°«^ ^™P^^«c manner
nS • I ^"^Ployment of the secret methods which
quacks m the newspapers are constantly offering. Such
means are the almost certain causes of painful uterine
diseases and of shortened life. They are productive of
more misery by far than over-production.

ih^niTf ^^^-^^ ""^T^y expedients is more frequent
than the use of injections ; none is more hurtful. It is
almost certain to bring on inflammation and ulceration "
nnn/^.T P^^Pa?.'^ *o assert," says the editor of an ably

wT, ^??;'^''^^J*'"'".^^ '"^ ^^^ ^'^«<^' "<^hat fully threl
fourihs of the cases we have met of the various forms and
effects of inflammation of the uterus and its appendages
m marned women are directly traceable to this method
ot preventing pregnancy."

..^^^,^^'J^''^^^''^ ^"".^ "^'^^ '^^"^'i ^e agreed upon any
subject. It IS upon this. The veriest tyro in the lawl

governing reyroduction now understands that the propi-
tious period of fecundity is the fortnight immediately
S'^'^'fi'^^f? we have denominated " The Rhythmic
t!^.A -i^!?, t^ft the opinion of the wisest physiologists
leans decidedly to the belief that should conception take

Sin>,^fT^*^•^^'.'.^'^^^^^^ this time the product will
probably be a girl ; if later, a boy.

These are not prurient details, but useful facts, with

iTrl,;«k r--— ^^ v^cua.io, uuo useiui lacts,

wh ch every married pair should be acquainted.
( Prurient ' and "prude » I interject, en passant,

I i

have

i^l

316

SHALL BABY BE?

other points of resemblance and more striking than in
the sound of the first syllable.)

The purest joys of wedlock are those of mutual affec-
tion, consonance of tastes, oneness in heart, mind and
purpose. The " walk together " should be in perfect step
and time. The divinest possibilities of our race are in
the hands of our best men and best women thus joined.
To approximate these, the production of offspring should
be by consent, and not a matter of chance or unmanly
persecution.

We leave this vitally important subject with a last and
strong quotation from Greg's " Enigma of Life." In the
paper entitled " Malthus Notwithstanding," we have this
optimistic prediction (conditional) :

" In addition to the positive and preventive checks to
over-population notified by him (Malthus), there exist
physiological checJcs which escaped his search, and which
will prove adequate for the ^vork they have to do. If we
were wise and virtuous, the positive check would entirely
disappear (with the exception of death, in the fulness of
time), and the prudential check be only called upon to
operate to that degree which is needed to elevate and
purify and regulate the animal instinct, and which is quite
reconcilable with, and conducive to virtue, happiness, and
health ; — in fine, Providence will be vindicated from our
premature misgivings when we discover that there exist
natural laws, whose operation is to modify and diminish
huvfian fecundity in proportion as mankind advances
in real civilization, in moral and intellectual develop-
ment ; and that these laws will (unless we thwart them)
have ample time and space wherein to produce their
effect long before that ultimate crisis shall arrive which
the Malthusian theory taught us so to dread."

riking than in

f mutual afFec-
lart, mind and
in perfect step
our race are in
en thus joined,
ffspring should
je or unmanly

with a last and
Life." In the
" we have this

itive checks to
is), there exist
<'ch, and which
3 to do. If we

would entirely
I the fulness of
called upon to
to elevate and
1 which is quite
, happiness, and
cated from our
ihat there exist
I and diminish
kind advances
ictual develop-
B thwart them)

produce their
,11 arrive which
ad."

,>^

CHAPTER XXIV.

COMING.

" ^u® P}''*^ ^"* caught its tiny stroke,
mi?*' ,., "" ''*' crimson hue from mine,
1 he life which I have dared invoke.
Henceforth is parallel with Think. "

-Emily C. Jcdson.

"From the moment of conception a n«"v life commences a new in<1ivir1«al
exists, another child is added to the family The mnJhp'rt,^^ livjK ^ i
sets about to destroy this life, either by Snt of cirror b'y UkiS^^tt

^l^^X^^^r^:^'^"^ ''- ^-^- againrth7"wir-^

This is the fearless deliverance of "one who knows"
Henry Ward Eeecher said in a lecture on the « Burdens
otbociety, delivered in ante helium times, that if, " everv
letter of the word" Slaveuy " were a Mount Sinai it
could not express too strongly his sense of the enorm'ity
of the iniquity. Now that the " Institution " he obiur-
gated, m season and outof season, has become a question
ot the Past, we may borrow the wholesale denunciation
tor application to the crime against which the above
sentence is launched. The stress upon the italicised
words is laid by the medical judge, not by me

Ignorant women are apt to believe that the child does
not live until the life is felt by the mother ; that all at-
tempts to destroy and dislodge the loathed intruder prior
to thati time are sinless— indeed, quite justifiable. Every

318

COMING.

physician in fair (or unfair) practice will testify to the
universality of this opinion among the unlearned ; the
frequency with which he is consulted by women of high
social standing and intellectual accomplishments upon
the safest means of effecting the same purpose.

A clergyman's wife thus inveighed against the family
doctor upon his refusal to lend himself to the project of
destroying a three months' fa'tus :

"And you, who call yourself a humane man, sworn to
do your utmost to alleviate the miseries of the human
race, condemn me to months of suffering, to the perils of
accouchement and subsequent loss of valuable time
rather than crush a contemptible animalcule ? "

Another woman, a prominent " Higher Life " exhorter,
entreated, even with tears, a physician of her own sex to
relieve her of " an incubus that would prevent her from
saving souls." Her pious work must go on.if the murder
of her unseen but living child were necessary to clear the
way !

Sharp and severe measures are imperatively indicated
for consciences thus diseased and twisted.

These were administered by an eminent surgeon to
whom the wife of a wealthy citizen applied in similar
circumstances :

" I can not — xvill not have this child, doctor ! " she
stated. " I am going abroad with my family the coming
summer to be absent for a year. The discovery of my
condition threatens to upset all my plans. 1 am willing
to pay any sum for your assistance at this juncture."

" Madam !" replied the upright Galen, "you are just
the woman for whom I have been looking for many
months. It is time that this sin of infanticide should be
checked by a notable example. I shall keep my eye on
you, and if you do not have this child — a living child —
at the proper season, I shall demand an investigation of
the case in the name of the law. I mean what I say, and
I shall keep my word." •

COMING.

819

nll^i^^ if "^IP 7 *^^'^ ^^'^'' «^ ^«^*'cam, from exam-

the heart to chronicle, or you to read them. The evil is
deadly, and the feeling that prompts to the commiss on
of the crime, widespread. ""»»iuu

Again -as concerning the use of the filthy and iniuri-
ous " preventives • referred to in our preceding chapter
I am constrained, m sickness of soul to take up Peter's
soothing word.s to those who had «k. led the Prince of
Life, and say I wot that through ignorance ye did it "
The germ of the misdeed is the failure to value arirrht our
mission as the mother-sex. ^

nn3u! *["'• *^ consigned to us by Him " who formed us Tri-
partite beings-His commission to us as Women who
through the loves He has also ordained, have Kme
wives-can not be misread without peril and sin. Next
to Him-in reverence I write it-we stand recognised as
he makers, as moulders of the race. One man i^ a mi^

mothlT'' fv' l™''^'' ^'' generation. The humblest
mother-' thinking God's thoughts after Him "-may

fZl ^^r^T' ?l *^''' "P^^ l^^^^g epi«*^les that are to
transmit them to the eternities.

The next mistake is the non-appreciation of the physi-
ological truth plainly set forth in the quotation from Dr
Napheys at the head of this chapter; 1 misapprehension

would t^"T% '^-^^^ "'* ^y ^^''^' ^^' t^'-rified woman
would ward oft pain, inconvenience and danger

Acquitting you, nay patient, and now my^dear reader
of all disposition to shirk the sacred obligations implied
by the yery words " Wife " and " Hu.sband," I pas^ wUh
pleasure to a matter that does concern, and very nearly
you and your embryonic treasure. As you have kent
yourself sound And clean in body and in spirit from yoS
L°l If ^««f f/fnity/nd purity are Christian duties
be doub y watchful of health and serenity in behalf of
the helpless creature lying so close to your heart. You
will discover now, if never before, the advantages of hold-

320

COMINQ.

ing imagination within bounds and impulse in check.
Discipline tells upon your own comfort, tenfold more
upon the formation of the growing Thing you would
have perfect in life and in limb, vigorous in mind, and
free from degrading tendencies. You should be at your
best when the latent germ receives that which develops
it into life and growth. The stock -raiser who could not
spell the word " propagation " and would stare stupidly
at talk of the " survival of the fittest," yet comprehends
the law I have hinted at. The arboriculturist takes his
buds from thrifty boughs and engrafts them upon stocks
as healthy. A weak, vicious breed ought not to be kept

Quietly and delicately adopt that regimen which will for-
ward all the ends you would gain. Beyond your husband
and your mother — or should she not be near you, some
discreet matron friend — let not the knowledge of your
sweet secret extend for a few months at least. As with
the dawn of Love's Young Dream, be J jealous of sharing
the happy news with those who, by coarse jest or unwise
pity, or officious counsels, would offend or alarm you.
God has given you something to expect and to live for ;
has laid a tiny shoot of immortality in the hollow of
your hand, and bidden you nurse it into healthful growth
and beauty. Thank Him hourly for the gift ; pray with-
out ceasing that you may be worthy of the trust.

If the manner of your outward life has been judicious
as respects exercise and occupation, do not alter it now.
A safe rule is when the new burden can be borne safely
and in even tolerable comfort, to act as much as possible
as if you were unconscious of it. Walk regularly, out-of-
doors, and as far as has been your habit heretofore, unless
the promenade is succeeded by.unpleasant symptoms such
as your friend and^physician warn you call for*especial
caution. Fresh air and cheerful exercise, the panacea for so
many fleshly ills, are never more truly a catholicon than
to you, as now situated. Walking, evenly and comfort-

COMING

I in check,
ifold more
yon would

mind, and
bo at your
!h develops
> could not
re stupidly
imprehends
b takes hia
ipon stocks

to bo kept

ich will for-
ur husband

you, some
ge of your
,. As with
of sharing
t or unwise
ilarm you.
bo live for ;

hollow of
iful growth
pray with-

'USt.

n judicious
Iter it now.
lome safely
as possible
rly, out-of-
fore, unless
ptoms such
for*especial
[lacea for so
olicon than
id comfort-

321

hal^e molTtirrM' ^''^' ^J".' ^'^ P^'^"<^' "^"^«1«« ^hat
nave more to bear than ever before, which will bo inxt^A

yet more heavily in the fulness of time If you lllow

these to become flaccid or strengthless by dfsuse thT

rt ZunXr' '^'^ "'" ^^'" ^-« or^tiZeVom
Clay to day until the pressure upon the lower abdomen and
the underlying region will be cruelly painful In walk-
ing. hold your shoulders in their normS pot on neither
stoonmgnor yet throwing back your boSy ingr^cefuHy
If all goes on naturally, you will be able to keen m

r/e ""of r^^'' ""'^ '^' ?P'^^^^°" «f ^^« tedious <C^
"comfor?Iwl ''"^"''*'''''' "^ \y''''- ^^ '« «««ential to a

comfortable ac-«c/^mmUhat you should do this.
fnWo. "^ f^ •" ^"« position is disagreeable and hurt-
f ul ; far more trying and dangerous than walking because
the weight settles hard upon one set of muscles fnddrZ
upon the spine. Reaching up both arms to amnge han|!
mgs pictures etc.. should be especially avoided wUMFt
ing heavy weights, jumping frL a stair or st^T or car-

rnXse'r:s":cr"^^"^^^^^ ^^^'^^ ^"^"^ ^-- --^---

Be merciful to yourselves in the matter of rest and leis-
ureful recreation. Liedown for half an hour whJn viu
come m from your "constitutional," and havL nleZnt
book within reach of your hand ^hen weary or "blue "

as'^ft^ar w?Si'\'^ dispirited and depressed without
as oiten as with known reason, s more than Hkelv
Some exceptionally happy women "never feel so well at
any other time," never so light-hearted, s^rfady^or work
as when 'capying "their children. Blessed areThev
among their sisters ! It is a common exclamation with
those less favoured that thes. exceptions "ought to W
babies for the whole community of womaJ There is

teg Zo^f ^'" "f ^..^^^^ ^ ^^^^ immunity from
sutiering. Should you not, there remains the console f 5..,

pay for it, let the price be what it may. Stay your

322

COMING.

!iA

I,! ■ i'

lii

heart upon the knowledge of this, however you may
feel. Do not allow your imagination to wander off into
dreary forebodings of disaster and death. The proba-
bilities that you will pass safely through the crisis, bear-
ing your infant in the arms of the love the Gracious
Father likens to His own, as far outnumber the possibili-
ties that you will not, as the sunny days outnumber the
stormy; as smiles are more abundant than tears. By a
cheerful, active habit of life, by looking resolutely away
from the gloomy to the bright side of the future, by
bringing to the endurance of bodily discomfort resolution,
hope, and faith, you can further a happy consummation
of present trials more ably than could the combined
medical skill of a continent.

Without depreciating this same medical skill, let me
counsel you against the too common weakness of con-
sulting even your family physician upon every new dis-
comfort incident to your condition. Without seconding
Miss Cobbe's declaration that " the old dangers implied
in the words ' priests, women, and families,' were less
than the perils of the newer triad — ' doctors, women, and
families ' " — I have as little patience as this celibate
Protestant Englishwoman with the class known as
" women's doctors."

" They," she says, " have much to answer for in the
way of demoralizing weak and impressionable women, —
in some cases, by ordering them stimulants in excessive
quantities, and in others, by leading them to a deadly
concentration of their thoughts upon disorders and weak-
nesses of their frames, of which the less any one thinks,
the better for soul and body."

The disorders, many and .annoying, which are synip-
tomatic of your state, are more easily controlled by diet
and care than by drugs or stimulants. Not one woman
in ten thousand thinks of submitting herself to an
" examination " to verify the fact of pregnancy, or when
this is admitted, to account for her "odd sensations."

COMING.

323

Not one in fifty thousand-I might say with truth not

this, or for consulting a professional physician at all ^
We give drugs to amuse the patient while Nature
Pej;f«™« the cure," said caustic Abemethy

intPnf.f r^K^T?'*^^?"" '"^'^ ^''^^''' ^i<^h compassionate
interest to the tale of your extraordinary affections and

tSS Th'af "ff ' 'r "^' '' '^ '^ ^^- candif even in
thought, that there has no strange thin^ happened

un o you He has no apprehension as to the^esTlt Tnd

less anxiety on the score of your " alarming" symptor^s

however well he may dissemble his sentiments underThe

assurance that you have done well in sending for him •

that there are indications which ought not to he neglected

such r/ n t^ ' '^f ^''^^' ^'^^"^^^ ^«"°^ inattention to
such and such symptoms, etc., etc., etc., et cetera.

Instead of swelling his bills, and boring or amusing
him by weekly consultations, give heed to a few pZS
motherly and nursely observations that may asSyou
in the conduct of your own case. ^

Pregnancy is no more a disease than'is the ripening of
a peach, the " running to seed " of a lily. It is SL^tly
natural process, for the perfection of which the^Creator

eas'lH^'n^ 1 f .'' ''T'' ^''''''' ^^ structure and
easily deranged, but in all respects exactly adapted for

the work appointed unto them. "^ All that 3'our will and
c^ld':ff.^r"^?f' ^^' knowledge of "the faculty "
could effect, would, be to remove whatever obstructs the

??rm1 r%''^:i'""- '^ ^^^'^ ^^ nomalformatbn(de!
formity, which does not appear once in a million cases).

roubrT'^ t''^'^ of pregnancy" are a transient
trouble. Every day is one less, when time is journeying

borTl\^^'1.^"'''/^^ r'^y P^"^ «^ inconvenS
borne strikes off one from the number to be suffered

^entT^i - ' "^'T^'"'' r? ^""* *° ^^^ period we will
wnmlf • '.r "• '^^ '^?^^ frequent-those common to aU
Xin^re t ---^-es,-for which you need not

324

COMING.

Morning sickness manifests itself generally, about the
time when the interrupted menses would, but for the ex-
isting state of affairs, have made their appearance — or
about four weeks after conception. As soon as the head
is lifted from the pillow after awaking, the diaphragm
rises iu dumb revolt. Dumb, because there is nothing to
throw off from the disturbed surface. Have upon a table
at your bedside a bit of crust or toasted bread — the drier
the better, — and munch it quietly before you offer to rise.
After swallowing the last crumb lie still for five minutes,
and then get up gently and slowly, not to irritate the
sensitive organ. Should the nausea return, provoke it
deliberately and with malice prepense, to the rejection of
the slight contents of the stomach ; lie down for a minute ;
bathe your face and wrists in cold water or cold water
and vinegar, — arise resolutely and go down at once to
breakfast, or have a slice of dry toast and cup of hot tea
brought to your bedroom. Force yourself to eat whether
you want the food or loathe the sight of it. Force your-
self, moreover, to think of something besides your qualms.
The meal disposed of safely, sit in the fresh air for ten
minutes or more, should the weather allow this. If the
day is cold, wrap up warmly and stand at an open window,
or saunter very gently on a sunny piazza.

After a few weeks' faithful observance of this regimen,
the system will probably adapt itself to your will. Should
the sickness recur during the day, take ten drops of Hors-
ford's Acid Phosphate in a tablespoonful of cold water,
and repeat this twice at intervals of half an hour. This
simple prescription is often singularly efficacious. An
excellent rule is never to let yourself get hungry during
the three months beyond which morning nausea seldom
continues. Emptiness of stomach is the provoking cause
of this affection. Eat lightly — dry bread or biscuit, Gra-
ham crackers — anything that is easy of digestion, and not
sweet, — but eat often. Lemon-juice is, with some, a spe-
cific for this affection. Acid fruits of all kinds are craved,

COMING-

325

[y, abouii the
it for the ex-
pearance — or
I as the head
3 diaphragm
is nothing to
upon a table
id — the drier
I offer to rise,
five minutes,

irritate the
1, provoke it
3 rejection of
for a minute ;
ir cold water
tt at once to
up of hot tea
) eat whether

Force your-
your qualms,
h air for ten
his. If the
)pen window,

this regimen,
will. Should
:ops of Hors-
f cold water,

1 hour. This
;acious. An
ingry during
ausea seldom
voking cause
biscuit, Gra-
stion, and not
. some, a spe-
is are craved,

and usually highly beneficial in quelling the uprising of
the stomach. In time, by the aid of any or all of these
appliances, and your own good sense, you will get the
seditious organ in hand, and the distressing affection
gradually cease to annoy you. Inani tion and exhaustion
sudden Inght or anxiety, are, nevertheless, apt to induce
It in any stage of gestation. It is wise to prevent these
mishaps by all available means.

Heartburn is not confined to any special period of the
nine months pilgrimage. It proceeds fi-om acidity of the
stomach, and is best removed by a teaspoonful of citrate
of kah stirred into a glass of clear water, a tumbler of
what the druggists sell as "plain soda," or a bit of block
magnesia dissolved in the mouth and swallowed slowly
A lady told me once that she ate a few sweet almonds
chewed very fine when thus troubled, and always found
relief in the use of the pleasant corrective. Should the
burning become constant and intense, abjure pastries
gravies and sweets, as tending to generate acid and bile'
and subsist upon brown bread (stale), rare beefsteak and
roast beef, juicy mutton, poultry, fresh fruits and vegeta-
bles until you are better. °

Constipation is a more serious ailment than any of the
two I have already mentioned. Sick headache, bilious-
ness, and— when it is very stubborn and prolonged— con-
vulsions^ fo low in its train. Correct it, if possible, by
diet Cracked wheat, corn bread, Indian meal gruel
mush and milk, apples (stewed, baked, and raw), Graham'
bread, and fruit in abundance-particularly peaches,
oranges and lemons, are more agreeable curatives and al-
ternatives than blue mass, rhubarb, and seidlitz powders.
A glass of Hathorn or Vichy water drunk before breakfast
IS otten eftectual, or an orange eaten at bed-time. Simple
enemata are useful in obstinate cases, but they should not
be resorted to except as a final measure for removing that
which other means have failed to cure. One ^on becomes
entirely dependent upon them.

326

COMING.

('<

Torpidity of the bowels is not infrequently succeeded
by the reverse of troublesome laxity. Unless this is ex-
cessive to the obvious weakening of the system, it. is not
alarming, particularly if the gestation be far advanced. It
is Nature's method of clearing the system of whatever
would militate against her design of a birth that shall
imperil neither mother nor child. The strength must be
kept up by suitable food, drives may be substituted for
long walks, and — most salutary of all expedients — change
of place, air, and diet for a few days or weeks be tried for
the cure or mitigation of the disorder.

Rice, boiled milk (ice-c jld or as hot as it can be safely
swallowed), arrow-root jelly and gruel, boiled mutton and
chicken, corn-starch, hasty pudding, thickened milk, well-
cooked dry toast unbuttered, ai'e among the articles suit-
able for your food while the diarrhoea continues.

Cramps — generally in the calves of the legs — are a
common annoyance, increasing in severity during the
eighth and ninth months. To check the paroxysm which
usually comes on while you are in bed, stretch your foot
straight out, bringing the heel into exact perpendicular
with the ball, and hold it in this position for some seconds.
The relief will be almost immediate and entire.

For jMin in the hack wear an Allcock's porous plaster
continuously, renewing as it wears off. This is an invalu-
able support when the weight on the small of the back
becomes heavy and the aching incessant.

To prepare the breasts for their novel office, wear a bit
of very coarse flannel next them for two months, and
bathe the nipples with a solution of alum and brandy. A
homoeopathic medicine — calendula — diluted with water,
is excellent for this purpose, used as a fomentation twice
a day.

For such graver affections as bloating of the whole body
and varicose veins, consult without delay an experienced
physician. If you have maintained your active habits
and the functional regularity of the digestive organs, you

COMING.

327

y succeeded
3 this is ex-
siD, it. is not
dvanced. It
)f whatever
b that shall
;th must be
stituted for
its — change
be tried for

in be safely
mutton and
I milk, well-
.rticles suit-
iies.

legs — are a
during the
scysm which
ih your foot
irpendicular
ime seconds,
e.

rous plaster
3 an invalu-
of the back

, wear a bit
nonths, and
brandy. A
with water,
,ation twice

wliole body
experienced
?,tive habits
organs, you

will not be likely to bloat, and the vein-swelling will pro-
bably be comparatively slight - ^
Whatever measure of pain and languor may be your

Fnf^nr' ^^ """' '^'•^P°'^^- ^^' ^"^ ^^'^'' «f <^^e unseen
mfant when you-give way to hysterical emotion is a token
of the close sympathy existing between its life and yours.
Put from you philosophically and firmly, not onlv dis^
tressful anticipations, but melancholy reveries on any
subject. Distrust moods, and, when these are capricious
question the conclusions formed while they are in posl
session. If tormented by persistent and unhealthy fan-
cies seek merry companies, social amusements, bits of en-
grossing fancy-work, "funny" books. Overwork is as
penlous as sadness-perhaps more hurtfui to the health
of the mother and the physical formation of the child.
h.L?r 1 1 ^T' ^}^^' P^*^®^"^ «*^o^'ies of the wholesale

LnLl- "^ ^' ^T ^y ^"^ E"g^^^^^ housewives of the
generations closely preceding this. They reared larc^e
tamihes, but the two or three leaves devoted to "Births"
:!'^^?^^:^^}y ^'^^^ ^^'\<^^owded with entries ^-nd the
Mv .tiff «ol"mns usually showed at least half as many.
My great-grandmother bore twelve children, six of whom
did not live two months. A death-drain like this needed
a patriarchal supply,

Madame du CMtelet-the most accomplished pupil of
Maupertius, the intimate companion for fifteen yeL of
Voltaire— writes thus, May 20 1749 •_ ^ » ^'■

of flSV'' J'T'^ ^^^^^^ ^ ^^'^^ ^«d «i^ce the departure
A,^^ I ^ '"'I® ^'^ ^1^6' sometimes at eight. I work

toui. _ At ten I stop to eat a morsel alone. I talk until
mr^^J'^^f""^''^ M de Voltaire, who comes ^o sup^th
fiv; ?n flf. ""dnigh I go to work again and . .ep on till
nve m the morning. ^

Her biographer takes up the temble tale —
bhe attempted tc do for Newton s ' Principia ' what
Mrs. Somerville afterward accomplished for tlie Astrono-

328

COMINO.

'5 1

. ,.u

my of Laplace. She translated the Latin into French,
and amplitied the demonstrations so as to bring the
work within the grasp of advanced French students of
Mathematics."

Elsewhere he says : —

" Nature will not be cheated in a matter of supreme
importance. She bore much from this ill-regulated Du
Chatelet, but turned upon her at last to wreak a sudden
and horrible vengeance." *

Her child was born September 4, 1749. In four days
she and it were dead.

The misogynist, Frederick of Prussia, who hated her
for the influence she exerted upon Voltaire, made himself
merry over the fatal occurrence in an epi aph : —

"Here lies one whp lost her life from the double
accouchement of a ' Treatise of Philosophy ' and of an
unfortunate infant."

Occupation is not necessarily toil, nor are seasons of
restfulness, indolence. A wise alternation of the two is
your present need.

I^efore, and above all else, hold fast to your belief in
the tender mercy and loving-kindness of Him whose

" Greatness
Flows around our incompleteness,"

the Infinite Fatherhood that has called you to the holy
estate of prospective maternity. Read and apply to your
case what blessed old Bunyan writes of the Valley of
Humiliation when you are tempted to murmur at your
long journey amid the shadows of the encompassing
heights : —

" It is the best and most fruitful piece of ground in
all these parts. Behold how green this valley is ; also,
how beautiful with lilies. Some also have wished that
the next way to their Father's house were here, that they
might be troubled no more with either hills or mountains
to go over.

" But the way is the way, and there is an end ! "

* Parton's " life of Voltaire," p. 647.

I into French,
to bring the
I students of

' of supreme
regulated Du
eak a sudden

In four days

ho hated her

made himself

h:—

I the double

'■ ' and of an

re seasons of
of the two is

our belief in
im whose

u to the holy
ipply to your
the Valley of
L'mur at your
encompassing

3f ground in
lUey is ; also,
! wished that
ere, that they
or mountains

a end ! "

I]^DEX.

Chapteb I.— Birth, not Bbgiitning.

Tian.

Mother's milk-Milk-producing food-Old wives

iif^l °U''.^_."'°*^«'« J»oods and habits upon the nursing

The baby-girl-Conjugated in the passive voice-Mrs. Gamp-
The mother's discovery-Original sin and actual trans-
gressions-Law of heredity-The burden of to-day .... 13

Chapter II.-— Infants' Food.

' fables— Ef.

^^ Bo«l«'^r'*'''"T *"i»^l-Substttute for mother's
iSg 7 . . . ^ ^**^ ^P"""*^"® °^ '^^Sular hours in feed-

Chaptbr IIL—Stabting Even.
Story of a child of Nature-Our sons and daughters start even
-Twelve years of boyhood for each sex-Mortalitv of

door hfe-Dietetics better than drugs-Illustrations from

Chapter IV.— Handicapped.

rnf^lf^T""'^^® ^^"^ constitutional weaknesses-The
moherthet-ue representative of radical reform-Fash-
Srls h*rA P""«^«-Why few women can walk-Half-

deseiratfo?X7rf T""

'« Pot?i.?n„~^ ^^^^^^ habits in the girl-

Pottering round "--Mrs. Garfield's broad-making-Dig-
nity of commonplace life— From birth to *he marri-'.f^ ^—
an irresponsible penniless pet-Why boys hav^stvini''
banks and girls do not-Domestic briber/ and corrupt^

330

INDEX.

Jhapter v.— Reverbnce of Sex.

PAGE.

The temple of the body— Practical study of anatomy and hy-
giene—Childish questionings and maternal lies—False del-
icacy, criminal reserve— Popular ignorance and pseudo
modesty — Sins of our grandmothers — Consequences to
this generation — Frank and serious confidence between
mother and girl-child- Tell her " Why ? "—How to begin
— The plain truth, and all of it—" Knowledge never yet
destroyed delicacy "—The study of physiology in schools—
Illustrations— What are " inconvenient things " ?— True
heredity — The mother builds for time and eternity 61

Chapter VI.— Thf First Turnino-point.

Perils of climacterics— Stealthy advance of the consciousness
of sex— Cure for morbid uneasiness— A fidgetty mother-
Crude growth unreasonable— How to meet peculiarities of
turning-point— Active ■ employment for mind and body —
Care of the skin— Sponge and plunge baths merely sur-
face drainage— Proper sewerage of the body— Morbid and
diseased appetites — Creation of a digestive conscience —
Evils of spiced food and stimulants—" Temperance and
Patience" >jq

Chapter VII.— Girlhood.

Girls not women— Longings for young ladyhood— A safe and

sheltered season — The value of the accumulative period

Immaturity not deformity— The mother's duty at this
juncture— Dr. Clarke on metamorphosis of tissue- The
made-woman and the woman-in-making— Nature can
supply, not create—" Enjoying bad health "—Health is a
duty—" Romantic sickliness is bathos and vulgarity ". . . . 91

Chapter ^VIII.— Brain- WORK and Brain-food,

Silas Peckham and salty fish— Mrs. Peckham, Indian corn, and
pork- Feeding-establishments and boarding-schools— Why
girls are sent from home to school — Age at which the girl
should enter college— Warning-signals from Vassar, Wel-

lesley. Smith, and Mount Holyoke— Fed by contract

Mrs. Putnam-Jacobi on mental action and physical health
— Indifference to food ominous— Illustrations— The stu-
dent's body must be built up, not kept under — What to
. eat, when and how to eat — Charlotte Bronte — A college
boys' appetite and that of a college girl 104

INDEX.

PAOB.

my and hy-
-False del-
nd pseudo
:iueiice8 to
3e between
)w to begin
never yet
n schools —
J " ?— True
nity

[NT.

iBciousness
mother —
iliarities of
ind body —
nerely sur-
lorbid and
nscience —
irance and

i safe and
e period —
ty at this
S9ue — The
ature can
lealth is a
irity "....

•FOOD ,

1 corn, and
)ol8 — Why
sh the girl
ssar, Wel-
contract —
icai health
-The Btu-
-What to
-A college

Chapter IX.-What Shall Oue Gikl Study?

331

College catalogues— Our eirl's new «n^oro Tt,„

CHiTTBR X—FiCB TO FlCli WIIH OoK GlM

j»rie„o,_Ph„ic.l ail,ne„jr„"d SrL of" -ten' ft."
Chapter XL-How Shall Our Girl Study?

vagance-Studying Xh hl?aS. Tnd^dd^^Lr-^^^^^^^^

PAGE.

iir

131

146

104

332

INDEX.

Chaptbu XIT.— Tna Rhythmic Cheik.

FAOE.

Heredity accentuated in the Third Part of woman's nature—
Aneemic blood leads to an aneBmic raind — What our grand-
mothers thought of the Rhythmic Check— A wise and
gracious means to an important and beneficent end — Dr.
Clarke's mild prohibitory clause— One day's rest in thirty
—A few safe and easy regulations— How girls study and
. think, and how boys— Dr. Mitchell on " Wear and Tear"
What is " a dangerous amount of friction " !— Workii. ■• in
deadly, superfluous earnest— EfJ'ect of mental agitation
upon the periodical function — How to become mistress of
yourself— Stop !— Working v ith, not against, Nature-
Equilibrium of thought-flakes and regularity of blood-tides
—The Sabbatical calm Id

Chapter XIII.— Ameeican Worry.

Women braver, but not more patient, than men— Doing only
one thing at a time— It is not work, but worry, that kills
— Will, not feeling, should rule— Taking up ashes with a
gold spoon — To prove tho brain sexless, divorce it from
the heart— Comparison between excessive emotion and
excessive study — Inherent and esslhtial healthfulness of
brain-work per ae— Degradation of work into worry- Illus-
trations- The specific for mental excitation— Longevity of
clergymen— Woman's need of something more tender
than philosophy, stronger than stoicism— The Better ^
Part ' 1*"

Chapter XIV.— What Then.

Graduated— Home-life, and "What to do with it "—Fancy-
work, candy-pulls, missionary-barrels and clubs— Desul-
tory reading »nd study— College curriculum and green
pickles— Specific employment a need— The society girl-
Open doors for the woman of To-day— Half-taught to do
nothing— Illustration— Youth the time for the "learning
how "—A look ahead '^°°

Chapter XV.— Called.

The King's commisBion- Patent prescriptions for feminine as-
pirations—Woman's kingdom— How to make the best of
one's self— Why women become ttachers- Diversity of
gifts— An anchor to windward— Efl"ect of a vocation upon
the woman herself — Anxious because aimless- Why the

Cu]

lOK.

FADE.

INDEX.

n's nature —
it our grand-
K. wise and
nt end — Dr.
est in thirty
3 study and
r and Tear "
-Workii.j' in
;al agitation
i mistress of
t, Nature —
i blood-tides

333

PAGE.

161

-Doing only
ry, that kills
aehes with a
rorce it from
amotion and
blthfulness of
vorry — Illus-
Longevity of
nore tender
-The Better

170

average woman " falls in lov« "—Mr- n«i . '.. '

of employment and industrvloTrlS!' ""^ ' y««"»t"'ty
study medicine-MiSS^^® ",P women's right to

Emily BronteV oTrtLa^j';'„r&.^a^^^^^^

work and poetic fancies-The " be?weeSt' es '?~^'"""'«^- 199

'^'SSgro^Tlur^tr^"'* ^* °^°*^«^ ^« "owded out ?-
considered SSSeit' S^dtZ ^"V^^ Wtchen-Un-
nobody-1 S p^cSfth^ZJ'"" "T^^^'^y **>
kingdom-' OnlymoS^ °"'"' ""^^ «"*"y

215

Chaptbb XVII.-Indian Sitmmbk.

it "— Fancy-
lubs — Desul-
n and green
society girl —
-taught to do
le " learning

Chapter XVIIL-Housekkkpiko Aia> Homk-makino."

224

185

r feminine as-
le the best of
—Diversity of
vocation upon
BBS- Why the

IlluatrationVlwLT* taught practical house-wiferv—

CBiPiBB XIX,— Dress.

more wnsible now thm iiV'piX."""™, '*""' ""*
this Fino Art ~rL . iSA for 'Z!!^ ViStT'''" 'iff^ *?
dre.. - PrsotioJ .^S- S^^rZ?!!'!,;!

334

INDEX.

PAOI.

Thomas on the dress of the PUgrim mothers-Our grand-
mothers' tight-lacing-What we have paid for it-Our
girl's corset- Dr. S. B. Hunt on dress-reform-Modern
improvements upon ancient usages in dress— Ladv Hunt-
iniTdon's court-costume— Night-dress and bed clothes-
Carbonic acid gas and effete animal matter— Aunt lldy
on cleanliness and beauty ^^0

Chaptbe XX.— Gossip.

Is culture a cure for gossip 1-A biting spice of tr"th-The be-
ginning of the end-IUustration-The blue-bottle fly in-
stinct— The SneerweU school— From gossipry to slander
—Where the cure must begin— Three cardinal rules— 1 he
Musca Cfflsar and fly doors- Which is the chief command-
ment ?— " Culture '^ «v/« a cure for gossip— Mrs. Arachne
Webb— Heroic treatment ''"'

Chapter XXI.— Prince Oharmino.

Sister Anne and the watch-tower-The abundant sphere-
Spnng/ield Betyublican and London Truth on 'Uses for
Women— Men not our natural enemies— Dr. Gregory s
" Legacy to his Daughters "—The accordant Whole— Ihe
silent side— IdeaUsm of woman's love— Titania and Bot-
tom— An exquisite touch of nature-^Fnendship between
young men and young women-How to identify the Prince
—No chance in the Universe— Marriage tlui risk of all
that time can jive— A squeamish fiction-People who
should not marry ' " ' *

Chapter XXII — Maehied.

The old-fashiouod novel and the moderti— Loveless marriage
an unchaste union— Coming down to every-day life-
Wifely jealousy of business— '« Management" of a hus-
band— lllustration-Sarason's first wife— Essentials and
non-essentials— Masculine compromise— A sm and a woe
sui genesis-Two incontrovertible truths— "Toleration of
foibles and fancies— What is innocent and what hurtful-
Better lose love than respect— Wifely heroism— Absolute-
ness of the marriage-tie ^''^

n.,.~>-» YYTTT __" Sh*lt- Baby BeI "

What must buUd up the Am-rican nation, as such ?— Voting
or making voters — The Augean Stables -Our grand-

283

INDEX.

835

PAOK.

308

mothers' many children- What are " Women's Ri7 «ts .
Suffer noMitte chiWren to come unto me"--Dr Na-

jjsL^stTpSior^^

Chapter XXIV.— Comiko.
•olemn warning-A too common crime-Sin and naril of

fovZlf p' KTr.*^ ^'^r-Z^ '^'^ '^^ rules-MeJ^ to
kd-lC^f ."nn * ^'"«"«-D«orders incident to this per-

§f, pkaV I ?~?«*'^ ?'"'"" *"^ patriarchal supply— Mme
du Chdtelet- ' How beautiful with Ulies ! "-''He wSl
the Way and there ia an End " inewayw