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 1 
 
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 3 
 
 4 
 
 S 
 
 6 
 
/.<,. :' 
 
 ^ |lcw axxb ®rt0tttal (Dpsva 
 
 IN TWO ACTS, 
 
 ENTITLED, 
 
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 THE YEOMEN i GUARD 
 
 OR, 
 
 THE HERRYMAN AND HIS MAID. 
 
 WRITTEN BY 
 
 W. S. GILBERT. 
 
 COMPOSED BY , ' 
 
 ARTHUR SULLIVAN. 
 
 LIBRETTO, 
 
 Frice, 25 Cents. 
 
 TORONTO: 
 
 Aoglo-Caoadian Mnsie Pablisliers' Association, Ld., 
 
 13 RICHMOND STREET WEST. 
 
 !;.:;;;'--.^ 
 
 All performing Rights in this Opera are reserved. Single detached numbers 
 may be sung at Oonoerts, nor muee than two at any one Concert, but they must 
 be given without Costume ov saflln. In no case must such performance be an- 
 nounced as " Selection " from the Opera. Application for the right of performing 
 the above Opera must be made to "Mr. D'OYLY CARTE, Savoy Theatre, 
 London." z' 
 
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 M 
 O 
 
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 J^ Item anh ®vi^incd ®p^Vii 
 
 /O B§ ENTITLED, 
 
 /iV TH'O ACTS, 
 
 ^^^^ ' s£^-c.0u>iv- 
 
 OR, 
 
 "S 
 
 3 
 
 THE MERRTMAN AND HIS MAID. 
 
 WRITTEN BY 
 
 W. S. GILBERT. 
 
 COMPOSED BY 
 
 ARTHUR SULLIVAN. 
 
 LIBKKTTO, 
 
 Priee, 25 Cents. 
 
 TOSONTOs 
 
 Anglo-Canadian Mnsie Publishers' Assoeiatlon, U^ 
 
 13 RICHMOND STREET WEST. 
 
 Enteml aooordiot to Aetof th« PwrlianiAnt oi OMMkda, In Mm 1^ 1888, by th« 
 Akolo-Cakadiah Mono Pvin<nBBM' AnooiAnoii, Qjd)., •! 
 
 \%tt 
 
Prodmeed at the Savoy Theatre^ London^ under the management of Mr, 
 
 D'Oyl^ Carter 9rd October, 1888, and at tJu Casino, Ne» York, 
 nth October, 1888, under the mamgement of Mr. Rudolph Aroneon, 
 
 OF m GDARD ; 
 
 OR. 
 
 m HERRYMIN AND HIS MAID. 
 
 Bramatis Persona. 
 
 Sib Riohabd Cholmondklet (Lieutenant 
 
 of the Tower) 
 
 CoLOiiEL Faibfax (umdertentenoe of death) 
 
 ^aMaith3in'ilLMXUt(of the Yeomen of the 
 
 Guard,) * 
 
 LstNTABD Mbbtll ( Hi» Son) 
 
 JaokPoimtM StroUing Jester)... 
 
 WiLTiBD Bbadbolt (Head Jailor of the 
 
 Tow^r and Aseietftnt Tormentor) 
 
 Tbb Hbapsman 
 
 FiBST Yeoman 
 
 Sboomo •• ...•..♦ 
 
 Tbibd •• 
 
 FOUBTH •* 
 
 FibstCitubn 
 
 Sbcovd '* « 
 
 ^isuMaxhabb {A StroUing Singer) 
 
 Ihsmho Mmbjll (Sfrgeant MergWe Daughter) 
 
 DJkMM OAiBUTHBBB {HoueeUeeper to the Tower.).,. 
 
 KjLTit{Herlfieoe)............ 
 
 Olionui of Yeomen of the Gaard, Oentlemen, Oitizeost fto. 
 
 8c«iie» Tower ISreeii, &OB4l9ib 
 
 Bniod, Sixtoentii Centmjr* 
 
Ifr. 
 
 w. 
 
 m mwA OF m gu&rd; 
 
 OB, 
 
 THE MERRYHAN AND HIS MAID. 
 
 '♦>» " 
 
 ACT I. 
 
 Scene — Tower Greem 
 
 Phcebe discovertii spinning, 
 
 SONG.— Phcebe. 
 
 When maiden loves, she siU and sighs, 
 
 She wanders to suid fro ; 
 
 Unbidden tear-drops fill her eyes, 
 And to all questions she replies, 
 With a sad height 1 
 Tis but a little word—'* Heigho I • , 
 So soft, 'tis scarcely heard—** Heigho I* 
 An idle breath, 
 Yet life and death 
 May hang upon a ma:id's **Hjeigho I * 
 
 When maiden loves, she mopes apart, 
 
 As owl mopes on a tree ; 
 Although she keenly feels the smart, 
 She cannot tell what ails her heart, 
 ^ With its sad** Ah me I » 
 Tis but a foolish sigh—** Ah »ne I * 
 Bom but to droop and die— ^'' Ah me !• 
 * Yet all the seme 
 
 Of eloquence 
 Lici hidden in a maid's " Ah me 1" 
 
 Bnkr Wilfr^. 
 WlL Mistress Mcryll t 
 
I'HCE. {looking Up). Eh! Oh! it's you, is it? You may gO 
 away, if you lik^. Because I don't want you, you know. 
 WiL. Haven't you anything to say to me ? 
 
 Phce. Oh, yes ! Are the birds all o^ed ? The wild beasts 
 all littered down ? All the locks, chains, bolts, and bars in good 
 order? Is the Little Ease sufficiently uncomfortable ? The 
 racks, pincers, and thumbscrews all ready for work ? Ugh ! 
 you brute 1 
 
 WiL. These allusions to my professional duties are in doubt- 
 ful taste. I didn't become a head-jailer because I like head* 
 jailing. I didn't become an assistant-tormenter because I like 
 assistant-tormenting. We can't a// be sorcerers, you know. 
 (Phcebe annoyed). Ah ! you brought that upon yourself. 
 
 Phce. Colonel Fairfax is not a sorcerer. He's a man of 
 science and an alchemist. 
 
 WiL. Well, whatever he is, he won't be one long, for he's to 
 be beheaded to<day for dealings with the devil His master 
 nearly had him last night, when the fire broke out in the 
 Beauchamp Tower. 
 
 Phce. Oh ! how I wished he had escaped in the confusion ! 
 But take care : there's still time for a reply to his petition for 
 mercy. ■ 
 
 WiL. Ahl I'm content to chance that. This evening at 
 half-past seven. 
 
 Phcb. You're a cruel monster to speak so unfeelingly of the 
 death of a young and handsome soldier. 
 
 WiL. Young and handsome! How do you know he's young 
 and handsome ? 
 
 Phce. Because Pve seen him every day for weeks past 
 taking his exercise on the Beauchamp Tower. (Wilfred uUers 
 a cry of agony). There, I believe you're jealous of him, now. 
 Jealous of a man I've never spoken to ! Jealous of |^poor soul 
 who's to die in an hour ! 
 
 WiL. I am I I'm jealous of everybody and everything. I'm 
 jealous of the very words 1 speak to you— because ihey reach 
 your ears— and I musn't go near 'em I 
 
 PK(£. How unjust you are I Jealous of the words you speak 
 
5 
 
 to me ) Why, you kt.ow as well as I do, that t don't even like 
 them. 
 
 WiL. You used to like 'em. 
 
 Phce. I used to pretend I liked them. It was mere polite- 
 ness to comparative strangers. {Exit Phcebe, with spinning 
 wheel), 
 
 WiL. I don't believe you know what jealousy is ! I don't 
 believe you know how it eats into a man's heart — and disorders 
 his digestion — and turns his interior into boiling lead. Oh, you 
 are a heartless jade to trifle with the delicate organization of the 
 human interior. 
 
 Enter crowd of Men and Women, followed by Yeomen of the 
 Guard, led by Sergeant Meryll. 
 
 CHORUS (as Yeomen march on). 
 
 Tower warders, . 
 
 Under orders, 
 Gallant pikemen, valiant sworders, 
 
 Brave in bearing, 
 
 Foeman scaring, 
 la their bygone days of daring. 
 
 Ne'er a stranger. 
 
 There to danger — 
 Each was o'er the world a ranger. 
 
 To the story 
 
 Of our glory 
 Each a bold contributory ! 
 
 CHORUS OF YEOMEN. 
 
 In the autumn of our life, 
 Here at rest in ample clover, 
 We rejoice in telling over 
 Our impetuous May and June. 
 In the evening of our day, 
 With the sun of life declining, 
 We recall without repining 
 All the heat of bygone noon, 
 
SOLO.— Meryll. 
 
 This the autumn of our life, 
 
 This the evening of our day : 
 Weary we of battle strife, 
 
 Weary we of mortal fray. 
 But our year is not so spent, 
 
 And our days are not so faded, 
 But that we with one consent. 
 
 Were our loved land invaded, 
 Still would face a foreign foe, 
 As in days of long ago. 
 
 People. 
 Tower warders, 
 Under orders, &c 
 
 Yeomen. 
 In the autumn time of life, &c 
 
 [Exeunt Crowd, Manent Warder; 
 
 J5f»^«r Dame Carruthbrs. 
 
 Dame. A good-day to you, Sergeant 
 
 Mbryll. Good-day, Dame Carruthers. Busy to-day ? 
 
 Dame. Busy, aye ! the fire in the Beauchamp last night has 
 given me work enough. A dozen poor prisoners— Richard 
 Colfax, Sir Martin Byfleet, Colonel Fairfax, Warren the preacher 
 poet, and half-a-score others — all packed into one small cell, 
 not six feet square. Poor Colonel Fairfax, who's to die to-day, 
 is to be removed to Na 14 in the Cold Harbour Tower, that 
 he may have his last hour alone with his confessor ; and I've 
 to see to that 
 
 Mer. Poor gentleman I He'll die bravely. I fought under 
 him two years sinc^ and he valued his . life as it were a 
 feather. 
 
 Ph(e. He's the bravest, the handsomest, and the best young 
 gentleman in England ! He twice saved my fother*s life ; and 
 if s a cruel thing, a wicked thing, and a barbarous thing that so 
 gallant a hero should lym his head — for it's the handsomest 
 head in England — 
 
 Damb. For dealings with the devil Aye 1 if all were be- 
 headed who dealt with him, there'd be busy doings on Tower 
 Green. 
 
 Puns. You knQw very well that Colonel Fairfea is i nodaiit 
 
T 
 
 of alchemy — nothing more, and nothmg less ; but this wicked 
 Tower, like a cruel giant in a fairy-tale, must be fed with blood, 
 and that blood must be the best and bravest in England, or it's 
 not good enough for the old blunderbore. Ugh i 
 
 Dame. Silence, you silly girl ; you know not what you say. 
 
 I was bom in the old keep, and I've grown grey in it, and, 
 
 please God, I shall die and be buried in it ; and there's not a 
 
 stone w its walls that is not as dear to me as my own right 
 
 hand. 
 
 SONG.— -Dame Carruthers. 
 
 When our gallant Norman foes 
 Made our merry land their own, 
 And the Saxons from the Conqueror were flying, 
 At his bidding it arose, 
 In its panoply of stone, 
 A sentinel unliving and undying. 
 Insensible, I trow. 
 As a sentinel should be, 
 Though a queen to save her head should come a-suing. 
 There's a legend on its brow 
 That is eloquent to me. 
 And it tells of duty done and duty doing. 
 
 The screw may twist and the rack may turn, 
 And men may bleed and men may bum. 
 On London town and all its hoard 
 I keep my solemn watch and ward I 
 
 ^ 
 
 Chorus. 
 
 The screw may twist, &c 
 
 Within its wall of rock 
 The flower of the brave 
 Have perished with a constancy unshaken. 
 From the dungeon to the block, 
 From the scaffold to the grave, 
 Is a journey many gallant hearts have taken. 
 And the wicked flames may hiss 
 Round the heroes who have fought 
 For conscience and for home in all its beauty ; 
 But the grim old Ibrtalice 
 Takes little heed of aught 
 Tbat coiMs not in tL: fneature of its duty. 
 
§ 
 
 The screw may twist and the rack may turn, 
 And men may bleed and men may burn, 
 On London town and all its hoard 
 It keeps its silent watch and ward ! 
 
 [Exeunt all but Phcebe and SERGEANT Mkryli. 
 
 Ph(E. Father ! No reprieve for the poor gentleman ? 
 
 Mer. No, my lass ; but there's one hope yet Thy 
 brother Leonard, who, as a reward for his valour in saving his 
 standard and cutting his way through fifty foes who would have 
 hanged him, has been appointed a Tower warder, will arrive 
 this morning ; and as he comes straight from Windsor, where 
 the Court is, it may be — it may be — that he will bring the ex- 
 pected reprieve with him. 
 
 Phce. Oh, that he may ! 
 
 Mer. Amen ! For the Colonel twice saved my life, and I'd 
 give the rest of my life to save his ! And will thou not be glad 
 to welcome thy bra '<" brother, with the fame of whose exploits 
 all England is a-ringing ? 
 
 Phce. Aye, truly, if he brings the reprieve. 
 
 And not otherwise ? 
 
 Well, he's a brave fellow indeed, and I love brave 
 
 Mer. 
 
 Ph(e. 
 men ! 
 
 Mer. 
 
 Phce. 
 
 AU brave men ? " 
 
 Most of them, I verily believe ! But I hope Leonard 
 will nof be too strict with me — they say he is a very dragon of 
 virtue and circumspection ! Now, my dear old father is kind' 
 ness itself, and — 
 
 Mer. And leaves thee pretty well to thine own ways, eh ? 
 Well, I've no fears for thee ; thou hast a feather-brain, but 
 thou'rt a good lass. 
 
 Phcr. Yes, that's all very true, but if Leonard is going to 
 tell me that I may not do this, and I may not do that, and I 
 must not talk to this one, or walk with that one, but go through 
 the world with my lips pursed up and my eyes cast down, like a 
 poor nun who has renounced mankind— why, as I have not re- 
 nounced mankind, and don't mean to renounce mankind, I won't 
 have it— there 1 
 
 Mbr. Nay, he'll not check thee more than is good for thee, 
 
Phoebe ! He's a brave feTTow, and bravest among brave fel- 
 lows ; and yet it seems but yesterday that he robbed the Lieu- 
 tenant's orchard. 
 
 SONG.— Meryll. 
 
 , A laughing boy but yesterday, 
 
 A merry urchin, blithe and gay I 
 Whose joyous shout 
 Came ringing out, 
 Unchecked by care or sorrow — 
 To-day, a warrior, all sun-brown. 
 Whose deeds of soldierly renown 
 Are all the boast of London Town ; 
 A veteran, to-r.;orrowI 
 
 When at my Leonard's deeds sublime 
 A soldier's pulse beats double time, 
 And brave hearts thrill, 
 As brave hearts will. 
 At tales of martial glory ; 
 1 burn with flush of pride and joy, 
 A pride unbittered by alloy, 
 To find my boy— my darling boy—- 
 The theme of song and story I 
 
 Enter Leonak d Meryll. 
 
 Leon. Father I 
 
 Mer. Leonard ! my brave boy I I'm right glad to see thee, 
 and so is Phoebe ! 
 
 Phce. Aye — hast thou brought Colonel Fairfax's reprieve ? 
 
 LEON. Nay, I have here a despatch for the Lieutenant, but 
 no reprieve for the Colonel ! 
 
 Ph(E. Poor gentleman ! poor gentleman I 
 
 Leon. Aye, I would I had brought better new:,. I'd give 
 my right hand— nay, my body— my life, to save his 1 
 
 Mer. Dost thou speak m earnest, my lad ? 
 
 Leon. Aye, I'm no braggart. Did he not say my life ? and 
 am I not his foster-brother ? 
 
 JilER. Then hearken to me. Thou hast come to join the 
 Yeomen of the Guard. 
 
Lfioff. Well? 
 
 Mer. None has seen tl^ee iivii ourselves ? 
 
 Leon. And a sentry, who took but scant notice of me f 
 
 Mer. Now to prove thy words. Give me the despatch. 
 Get thee hence at once 1 Here is money, and I'll send thee 
 more. Lie hidden for a space, and let no one know. I'll con- 
 vey a suit of yeoman's uniform to the Colonel's cell — he shall 
 shave off his beard so that none shall know him, and I'll own 
 him as my son, the brave Leonard Meryll, who saved his flag 
 and cut his way through fifty foes who thirsted for his life. He 
 will be welcomed without question by my brother yeomen. 
 I'll warrant that Now, how to get access to his cell ? The 
 key is with thy sour-faced admirer, Wilfred Shadboldt {to 
 Phcebe). 
 
 Phce. (demurely), 1 think — I say, I think — I can get anything 
 I want from Wilfred. I think — I say, I think — you may leave 
 that to me. 
 
 Mer. Then get thee hence at once, lad — ^and bless thee for 
 this sacrifice. 
 
 Phce. And take my blessing too, dear, dear Leonard. 
 
 Leon. And thine, eh ? Humph 1 Thy love is new-born ; 
 wrap it up, lest it take cold and die. 
 
 TRIO.— Leonard, Phcebe, Mbryli* 
 
 Phce. Alas ! I waver to and fro — 
 
 Dark danger hangs upon the deed ! 
 All. Dark danger hangs upon the deed I 
 
 Leon. The scheme is rash and well may fail ; 
 But ours are not the hearts that quail — 
 The hands that shrink — the cheeks that pale 
 In hours of need ! 
 
 All. No, ours are not the hearts that quail — 
 
 The hands that shrink — ^the cheeks that pale 
 
 In hours of need ! 
 The air I breathe to him I owe : 
 My life is his — I count it naught 1 
 That life is his — so count it naught I 
 
 Leon. And shall I reckon risks J run 
 
 When services are to be done 
 
11 
 
 To save the life of sucli an one? 
 
 Unworthy thought I 
 
 All. And shall we reckon risks we run 
 
 To save the life of such an one ? 
 
 Unworthy thought ! 
 
 PH(E. We may succeed — who can foretell ? 
 May heaven help our hope — farewell! 
 
 ALU We may succeed— who can foretell ? 
 
 May heaven help our hope — farewell ! 
 
 Leonard embraces Meryll and Phosbe, and then exit. 
 
 Phcebe wseping, 
 
 Mer. Nay, lass, be of good cheer, wc may save him yet. 
 Phce. Oh I see, father— they bring the poor gentleman 
 from the Beauchamp. Oh, father ! his hour is not yet come ? 
 
 Mer. No, no, they lead him to the Cold Harbour Tower to 
 wait his end in solitude. But softly — the Lieutenant ap- 
 proaches ' He should not see thee weep. 
 
 [Hnter Fairfax, guarded. The Lieutenant enters^ meeting 
 
 him.] 
 
 Lieut. Halt I Colonel Fairfax, my old friend, we meet but 
 sadly. 
 
 Fair. Sir, I greet you with all good-will ; and I thank you 
 for the zealous care with which you have guarded me from the 
 pestilent rangers whith threaten human life outside. In this 
 happy little community, death, when he comes, doth so in 
 punctual and business-like fashion, and, like a courtly gentle- 
 man, giveth due notice of his advent, that one may not be 
 taken unawares. 
 
 Lieut. Sir, you bear this bravely, as a brave man should. 
 
 Fair. Why, sir, it is no light boon to die swiftly and surely 
 at a given hour and in a given fashion. Truth to tell, I would 
 gladly have my life ; but if that may not be, I have the next 
 best thing to it, which is death. Believe me, sir, my lot is not 
 so much amiss. 
 
 Phos {aside to Meryll.) Oh, father, father, I cannot bear 
 it ! 
 Mer. My poor lass ! 
 FAIK* Nay, pretty one, why wcepcst thou ? (^ome^ be cqv(\» 
 
12 
 
 
 forted. Such a life as riiine is not worth weeping for. (sees 
 Meryll.) Sergeant Meryll, is it uot ? (to LiEUT.) May I 
 greet my old friend ? (shakes Meryll's hand.) Why, man, 
 what's all this ? Thou and I have faced the grim old king a 
 dozen times, and never has his majesty come to me in such 
 goodly fashion. Keep a stout heart, good fellow — w^ are 
 soldiers, and we know how to die, thou said I. Take my word 
 for it, it is easier to die well than to live weh —for, in sooth, I 
 have tried both. 
 
 BALLAD. —Fairfax. 
 
 Is life a boon ? 
 
 If so, it must befal 
 
 That death when'er he call, 
 Must call too soon. 
 
 Though fourscore years he give. 
 
 Yet one would pray to live 
 Another moon ! ^ ' 
 
 What kind of plaint have I, 
 
 Who perish in July? 
 
 I might have had to die. 
 Perchance, in June ! 
 
 Is life a thorn ? 
 
 Then count it not a whit li 
 
 Man is well done with it , 
 Soon as he's born 
 
 He should all means essay 
 
 To put the plague away ; 
 And I, war-worn. 
 
 Poor captured fugi' ive. 
 
 My life most gladly give— 
 
 I might have had to live 
 Another mom t 
 
 [At the end, Phcebe is led off^ weepings by MERYLL. 
 
 Fair. And now. Sir Richard, I have a boon to beg. I am in 
 this strait for no better reason than because my kinsman, Sir Clar- 
 ence Poltwhistle, one of the Secretaries of State, has charged 
 me with scrcery, in order that he may succeed to my estate, 
 which devolves to him provided I die unmarried. 
 
 I^IEUT, As thou wilt most fur^ly ^o. 
 
18 
 
 Fair. Nay, as I will most sursly not do, by your worship's 
 grace I have a mind to thwart this good cousin of mine. 
 Lieut. How ? 
 
 Fair. By marrying forthwith, to be sure ! 
 Lieut. But heaven ha' mercy, whom wouldst thou marryi 
 
 Fair. Nay, I am indifferent on that score. Coming Death 
 hath made of me a true and chivalrous knight who holds all 
 womankind in such esteem that the oldest, and the meanest, 
 and the worst favored of them is good enough for him. So, 
 my good lieutenant if thou wouldst serve a poor soldier who 
 has but an hour to live, find me the first that comes ; my con- 
 fessor shall marry us, and her dower shall be my dishonoured 
 name and a hundred crowns to boot. No such poor dower for 
 an hour of matrimony I 
 
 Lieut. A strange request I doubt that I should be war- 
 ranted in granting it. 
 
 Fair. Tut tut I There never was a marriage fraught with 
 so little of evil to the contracting parties. In an hour she'll be 
 a widow, and I — a bachelor again for aught I know ! 
 
 Lieut. Well, I will see what can be done, for I hold thy 
 kinsman in abhorrence for the scurvy trick he has played 
 thee. 
 
 Fair. A thousand thanks, good sir ; we meet again on this 
 spot in an hour or so. I shall be a bridegroom then, and your 
 worship will wish me joy. Till then, farewell. {To guard)— I 
 am ready, good fellows. 
 
 {Exit with Guard into Cold Harbour Tower,) 
 
 Lieut. He is a brave fellow, and it is a pity that he should 
 die. Now to find him a bride at short notice. Well, the task 
 should be easy ! [Exit, 
 
 Enter JACK Point and Elsie Maynard, pursued by a crowd qf 
 men and women. Point and Elsie are much terrified \ 
 Point, however ^ assuming an appearance of 9elf-po§s^s§ion^ 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Here's a man of jollity, 
 
 Jibe, joke, jollify 1 
 Give us of your quality, 
 
 Com^ fool^ follify I 
 
u 
 
 ■ 1 If you vapour vapidly, 
 
 River runneth rapidly, 
 Into it we fling 
 Bird who doesn't sing. 
 
 Give us an experiment 
 In the art of merriment, 
 
 Into it we throw 
 
 Cock who doesn't crow. 
 
 Banish your timidity, 
 And with all rapidity 
 Give us quip and quiddity — 
 WiUy-nilly, 01 
 
 River none can mollify. 
 
 Into it we throw 
 Fool who doesn't foUify, 
 
 Cock who doesn't crow I 
 
 Point {alarmed.) My masters, I pray you bear with us, and 
 we will satisfy you, for we are merry folk who would make all 
 merry as ourselves. For, look you, there is humor in all things 
 and the truest philosophy is that which teaches us to find it and 
 to make the most of it. 
 
 Elsie (struggling with one of the crowd.) Hands off, I say, 
 unmannerly fellow I {pushing him away). 
 
 Point (to ist Ciiixen.) Ha I Didst thou hear her say, 
 ** Hands off?" 
 
 First Cit; Aye, I heard her say it, and I felt her do it 1 
 What then ? 
 
 Point. Thou dost not see the humor of that ? 
 
 First Cit. Nay, if I do, hang me ! 
 
 Point. Thou dost not ? Now observe. She said, ** Hands 
 off I" Whose hand5? Thine. Ofi what? Off Her, Why? 
 Because she is a woman. Now had she not been a woman, 
 thine hands had not been set upon her at all. So the reason 
 for the laying on of hands is the reason of the taking off of 
 hands, and herein is contradiction contradicted. It is the very 
 marriage of ^1*0 with con ; and no such lopsided union either, as 
 times go, for /*ro is not more unlike oon than man is unlike wo- 
 fpan— ^Ct m«n and women marry ever^ day with none to sa^. 
 
1» 
 
 ** oil, the pity of iV but I and fools like ifie f Now wlierewitfiaf 
 shall we please you ? We can rhyme you couplet, triolet, qua- 
 train, sonnet, rondolet, ballade, what you will. Or we can dance 
 you saraband, gondolet, carole, pimpernel or Jumping Joan. 
 
 Elsie. Let us give them the singing farce of the Merrymao 
 and his Maid — therein is song and dance too. 
 
 >\i L. ->ye, the Menyman and his Maid ! 
 
 DUET.— Point and Elsib. 
 
 Point. 
 Elsie. 
 Point. 
 
 1 have a song to sing, O ! 
 
 Sing me your song, O ! 
 
 It is sung to the moon 
 By a love-lorn loon. 
 Who fled from the mocking throng, O I 
 It's the song of a menyman, moping mum. 
 Whose soul was sad and whose glance was glum. 
 Who sipped no sup and who craved no crumb, ^ 
 As he sighed for the love of a ladye, 
 Heighdy ! heighdy I 
 Misery me, lackadaydy I 
 He sipped no sup, and he craved no crumb, 
 As he sighed for the love of a ladye 1 
 
 Elsie. I have a song to sing, O ! 
 
 Point. ^ Sing me your song, O ? 
 
 Elsie. It is sung with the ring 
 
 Of the songs maids sing 
 Who love with a love life-long, O ! 
 it's the song of a merrymaid, peerly proud, 
 Who loved a lord, and who laughed aloud 
 At the moan of the menyman, moping mum. 
 Whose soul was sore and whose glance was glum, 
 Who sipped no sup, and who craved no crumb. 
 As he sighed for the love of a ladye I 
 Heighdy I heighdy ! 
 Misery me, lackadaydy ! 
 
 He sipped no sup, &c 
 
 Point. i have a song to sing, O I 
 
 Elsie. Sing me your song, 01 
 
u 
 
 Poifii. It li sung to the knell 
 
 Of a churchyard bell, 
 And a doleful dirge, ding dong, O I 
 It's a song of a popinjay, bravely born. 
 Who turned up his noble nose with scorn 
 At the humble merrymaid, peerly proud, 
 Who loved that lord and who laughed aloud 
 At the moan of the merryman, moping mum, 
 Whose soul was sad, and whose glance was glum, 
 Who sipped no sup and who. craved no crumb, 
 As he sighed for the love of a ladye. 
 
 Both Heighdy ! heighdy ! 
 
 Misery me, lackadaydy I 
 
 He sipped no sup, &C. 
 
 Elsie. I have a song to sing, O I 
 
 Point. Sing me your song, O t 
 
 Elsie. It is sung with a sigh 
 
 And a tear in the eye, 
 For it tells of a righted wrong, O ! 
 It's a song of a merrymaid, once so gay. 
 Who turned on her heel and tripped away 
 From the peacock popinjay, bravely bom. 
 Who turned up his noble, nose with scorn 
 At the humble heart that he did not prize ; 
 She begged on her knees, with a downcast eyes, 
 For the love of the merryman moping mum. 
 Whose soul was sad, and whose glance was glum, 
 Who sipped no sup, and who craved no crumby 
 As he sighed for the love of a ladye 1 
 
 Both. Heighdy ! heighdy I 
 
 Misery me, lackadaydy I 
 His pains were o'er, and he sighed no more. 
 For he lived in the love of a ladye I 
 
 1ST CiT. Well sung and well danced I 
 
 2ND CiT. A kiss for that, pretty maid I 
 
 ALL; Aye, a kiss all round. 
 
 Elsie {drawing dagger). Best beware I I am armed t 
 
 Point. Back, sirs-^back I This is going too far. 
 
17 
 
 2ND CiT. Thou ' dost not see the humour of it, eh ! Yet 
 there is humour in all things — even in this. (Trying to kis9 
 her.) 
 
 Elsie. Help! Help I 
 
 Enter Lieutenant wilh guard. Crowd falls bach. 
 
 Lieut. What is this pother ? 
 
 Elsie. Sir, I sang to these folk, and they would have repaid 
 me with gross courtesy, but for your honour's coming. 
 
 Lieut, (to Mob). Away with yel Clear the rabble. (Guards 
 push crowd offf and gj off with them,) Now, my girl, who are 
 you, and what do you here ? 
 
 Elsie! May it please you, sir, we are two strolling players, 
 Jack Point and I, Elsie Maynard, at your worship's service. We 
 go from fair to fair, singing and dancing, and playing biief in- 
 terludes ; and so we make a poor living. 
 
 Lieut. You two, eh ? Are ye man and wife ? 
 
 Point. No, sir, for though I'm a fool, there is a limit to my 
 folly. Her mother, old Bridget Maynard, travels with us (for 
 Elsie is a good girl), but the old woman is a-bed with fever, and 
 we have come here to pick up some silver, to buy an electuary 
 forh^r. ' ' 
 
 Lieut. Hark ye, my girl ! Your mother is ill ? 
 
 Elsie. Sorely ill, sir. 
 
 Lieut. And needs good food, and many things that thou 
 canst not buy ? 
 
 Elsie. Alas ! sir, it is too true. 
 
 Lieut. Wouldst thou earn a hundred crowns ? 
 
 Elsie. An hundred crowns I They might save her life I 
 
 Lieut. Then listen. A worthy, but unhappy gentleman is to 
 be beheaded in an hour on this very spot For sufficient rea- 
 sons, he desires to marry before he dies, and he hath asked me 
 to find him a wife. Wilt thou be that wife ? 
 
 Elsie. The wife of a man I have never seen ! 
 
 Point. Why sir, look you, I am concerned in this ; for 
 though I am not yet wedded to Elsie Maynard, Time works 
 wonders, and there's no knowing what may be in store for us. 
 Have we your worship's word for it that this gentleman will die 
 to-day ? 
 
18 
 
 Lieut. Nothing is more certain, I grieve to say. 
 Point. And the maiden will be allowed to depart the very 
 instant the ceremony is at an end ? 
 
 Lieut. The very instant. I pledge my honour that it shall 
 be so. 
 
 Point. An hundred crowns? 
 
 Lieut. An hundred crowns f 
 
 Point. For my part, I consent. It is for Elsie to speak. 
 
 TRIO.— Elsie, Point, and Lieut. 
 
 Lieut. How say you, maiden, will you wed 
 A man about to lose his head ? 
 No harm to you can thence arise, 
 In half an hour, poor soul, he dies. ^ . 
 
 For half an hour 
 
 You'll be a wife, 
 And then the dower 
 Is yours for life. 
 This tempting o.Ter why refuse ? 
 
 If truth the poets tell, 
 Most men, before they mari-y, lose 
 Both head and heart as well! 
 
 All. ' Temptation, oh temptation. 
 
 Were we in truth intended 
 To shun . whate'er our station. 
 Your fascinations splendid ; 
 Or fall whene'er we view you. 
 Head over heels into you I 
 
 Elsie. A strange proposal you reveal. 
 It almost makes my senses reel, 
 Alas I I'm very poor indeed. 
 And such a sum I sorely need. 
 Unfortunately, 
 
 Life and death 
 Have hung till lately 
 On a breath. 
 My mother, ^r, is like to die, 
 This money life may bring, 
 Bear this in mind, I pray, if I 
 Consent to do this thing i ^ 
 
10 
 
 rery 
 hall 
 
 All. Temptation, oh temptation, Ac 
 
 Point. Though as a general rule of life 
 I don't allow my promised wife, 
 My lovely bride that is to be, 
 To marry anyone but me, 
 The circumstances 
 
 Of this case 
 May set such fancies 
 Out of place. 
 So if the fee is duly paid. 
 And he, in well earned grave, 
 Within the hour is duly laid, 
 Objection I will waive I 
 
 All. Temptation, oh, temptatioii, Ac 
 
 During thiSf the LIEUTENANT has whispered to WILFRED Cwko 
 hastntered,) Wilfred hinds Elsie's eyeg with a kerehiej 
 and leads her into the Cold Harbour Tower, 
 
 Lieut. And so, good fellow, you are a jester ? 
 
 Point. Aye, sir, and, like so/ne of my jests, out of place. 
 
 . Lieut. I have a vacancy for such an one. Tell me, what 
 are your qualifications for such a post ? 
 
 Point. Marry, sir, I have a pretty wit I can, iliyme yno 
 extempore ; I can convulse you with quip and conundrum ; 1 
 have the lighter philosophies at my tongue's tip ; I can be 
 merry, wise, quaint, grim, and sardonic, one by one, or all at 
 once ; I have a pretty turn for anecdote ; I know all the jests — 
 ancient and modern — past, present, and to come ; I can riddle 
 you from dawn of day to set of sun, and, if that content you not, 
 well on to midnight and the small houni. Oh, sir, a pretty wit, 
 I warrant you — a pretty, pretty wit ! 
 
 REGIT. AND SONG.- POINT. 
 
 I've jest and joke 
 
 And quip and crank, 
 For lowly folk . 
 
 And men of rank. 
 I ply my craft 
 
 And know no fear, 
 I aim my shaft 
 
 At prince or peer. 
 
 
At peer or prince — at prince or peer, 
 1 aim my shaft and know no fear ! 
 
 Pve wisdom from the East and from the West, 
 
 That's subject to no academic rule, 
 You may find it in the jeering of a jest, 
 > Or distil it from the folly of a fooL 
 
 I can teach you with a quip if I've a mind — 
 ^" I can trick you into learning with a laugh, 
 
 Oh winnow all my folly and you'll find 
 A grain or two of truth among the chaff 1 
 
 I can set a braggart quailing with a quip, 
 The upstart I can wither with a whim, 
 He may. wear a merry laugh upon his lip ; 
 ^ But hi3 laughter has an echo that is grim, 
 
 When they're offered to the world in merry guise^ .^^ 
 Unpleasant truths are swallowed with a will — ^> 
 For he who'd make his fellow creatures wise 
 
 Should always gild the philosophic pill ! 
 
 ■ • -1 . . 
 
 Lieut. And how came you to leave your last employ ? 
 
 Point. Why sir, it was in this wise. My Lord was th« 
 Archbishop of Canterbury and it was considered that one of 
 my jokes was unsuited to his Grace's family circle. In truth I 
 ventured to ask a poor riddle, sir — Wherein lay the diflference 
 between his Grace and poor Jack Point ? His Grace was 
 pleased to give it up, sir. . And thereupon I told him that 
 whereas his Grace was paid ;£io,ooo a year for being good, 
 poor Jack Point was good for nothing. 'Twas but a harmless 
 jest, bat it offended his Grace^ who whipped me and set me in 
 the stocks for a scurril rogue, and so we parted. I had as lief 
 not take post again with the dignified clergy. 
 
 Lieut. But I trust you are very careful not to give oflfence. 
 I have daughters. 
 
 Point. Sir, my jests are most carefully selected, and any- 
 thing objectionable is expunged. If your honour pleases, I 
 will try them first on your honour's chaplain. 
 
 Lieut. Can you give me an example. Say that I had sat 
 me down hurriedly on something sharp ? 
 
 Point. Sir, t ihoold say that you had sat down cnt ttietpur 
 of the .i^oment 
 
 be 
 t' 
 
 h\ 
 a 
 
 S( 
 
 y 
 
 k 
 
^i 
 
 
 of 
 
 I 
 
 tee 
 as 
 lat 
 Hi, 
 
 SSf 
 
 in 
 ief 
 
 It 
 
 IT 
 
 Lieut. Humph. I don't think much of that. Is that the 
 best you can do ? 
 
 Point. It has always been much admired, sir, but we will 
 iry again. 
 
 Lieut. Well then, I am at dinner, and the joint of meat is 
 but half cooked. 
 
 Point. Why then, sir, I should say — that what is underdone 
 cannot be helped. 
 
 Lieut. I see. I think that manner of thing would be 
 somewhat irritating. 
 
 Point. At first, sir, perhaps ; but use is everything, and 
 you would come in time to like it 
 
 Lieut. We will suppose that I caught you kbsing the 
 kitchen wench under my very nose. 
 
 Point. Under hsr very nose, good sir— not under yours I 
 That is where I would kiss her. Do you take me ? Oh, sir, a 
 pretty wit — a pretty, pretty wit I 
 
 Lieut. The maiden comes. Follow me, friend, and we will 
 discuss this matter at length in my library. 
 
 Point. I am your worship's servant. That is to say, I trust 
 I soon shall be. But,/ before proceeding to a more serious 
 topic, can you tell me, sir, why is a cook's brain-pan like an 
 overwound clock ? 
 
 Lieut. A truce to this fooling — follow me. 
 
 Point. Just my luck ; my best conundrum wasted 1 
 
 Exeunt* 
 
 Enter Elsie /row Tower, followed by Wilfred, who removes ths 
 
 bandage from her eyes, 
 
 RECITATIVE AND BALLAD.— Elsib. 
 
 Tis done I I am a bride! Oh, little ring, 
 That bearest in thy circlet all the gladness 
 
 That lovers hope for, and that poets sing, 
 What bringest thou to me but gold and sadness ? 
 
 A bridegroom all unknown, save in this wise, 
 
 l^o^y lie dies I To-day, alas, he dies I . . 
 
 Though tear and long-drawn sigh ' 
 
 . - 111 fit a bride, 
 
 No sadder wife than I 
 
22 
 
 The whole world wide I 
 Ah me t Ah me I 
 Yet maids there be 
 Who would consent toi lose 
 The very rose of youth, 
 
 The flower of life, 
 To be, in hor^ast truth, 
 A wedded wife, 
 
 No matter whose I 
 
 Ere half an hour has rung, 
 
 A widow II 
 As heaven, he is too young, 
 loo brave to die I 
 Ahmet Ah me I 
 Yet wives there be 
 So wcaiy worn, I trow. 
 
 That they would scarce complain, 
 
 So that they could 
 In half an hour attain 
 To widowhood. 
 
 No matter how I 
 
 .^ . [Exit Elsie at Wilfred oomst down, 
 
 lUll. (loohing qfter Elsie.) 'Tis an odd freak, for a dying 
 man and his confessor to be closetted alone with a strange 
 singing girl I would fain have espi-id them, but they stopped 
 up the keyhole. My keyhole. 
 
 Enter Phcebe with Meryll, who earriet a hmdU, Meryll 
 remains in the backgroundt unobserved by WILFRED. 
 Ph(b. (aside.) Wilfred — and alone 1 Now to get the keys 
 from him. (Akmd.) Wilfred — ^has no reprieve arrived 7 
 
 WiL. None. Thine adored Fairfax is to die. 
 
 Phce. Nay, thou knowst that I have naught but pity for the 
 poor condemned gentleman. 
 
 WiL. 1 know that he who is about to die is more to thee than 
 I, who am alive and weU. 
 
 Ph(b. Why, that were out of reason, dear WilfiAed. .DQjthey 
 not say that a live ass is better than a dead lion ? No^ I don*t 
 mean that 
 
 WiL. They say that, do they ? 
 
2» 
 
 [fK 
 
 n, 
 
 id 
 
 ^s 
 
 - Ph(E. It's unpardonably rude of them, but I believe they put 
 it in that way. Not that it applies to thee, who art clever be- 
 yond all telling. 
 
 WiL. Oh, yes ; as an assistant-tormentor. 
 
 Phce. As a wit, as a humorist, as a most philosophic com- 
 mentator on the vanity of human resolution. 
 
 (Phcebe tlyly takes a buneh of keys from Wilfred's waistband^ 
 aud hands them to Meryll, who enters the Tower imnoticed 
 by Wilfred.) 
 
 WiL. Truly, I have seen great resolution give way under 
 my persuasive methods {working a small thumbscrew). In the 
 nice regulation of a screw, in the hundredth part of a single 
 revolution lieth all the difference between stony reticence and a 
 torrent of impulsive unbosoming that the pen can scarcely 
 follow. Ha I ha t I am a mad wag. 
 
 Phce. (with a grimace.) Thou art "a most light-hearted and 
 delightful companion. Master Wilfred. Thine anecdotes of the 
 torture-chamber are the prettiest hearing. 
 
 WiL. I'm a pleasant fellow an I choose. I believe I am 
 the merriest dog that barks. Ah, we might be passing happy 
 together. 
 . Phce. Perhaps. I do not know. 
 
 ! WiL. For thou wouldst make a most tender and loving 
 wife. 
 
 Ph(E. Aye, to one whom I really loved. For there is a 
 "wealth «of love within this little heart — saving up for — I 
 wonder whom ? Now, of all the world of men, I wonder 
 whom ? To think that he whom I am to wed is now alive 
 and somewhere I Perhaps far away, perhaps close at hand. 
 And I know him not I It seemeth that I am wasting time in 
 not knowing hinu • 
 
 WiL. Now say that it is I — nay ! suppose it for the nonce* 
 Say that we are wed — suppose it only — say that thou art my 
 very bride, and I thy cheery, joyous, bright, frolicsome husband 
 ■—and that the day's work being done, and the prisoners stored 
 away for the night, thou and I are alone together — with a long, 
 long evening before us. 
 ' Phol (with a grimace,) It is a pretty picture — (mt I scarcely 
 
I ! 
 
 24 
 
 know. It cometh so unexpectedly — and yet — and yet — were 1 
 thy bride — 
 
 WiL. Aye — wert thou my bride ? — 
 
 Puce. Oh, how I would love thee ! 
 
 ^ BALLAD.— Phcebe. 
 
 Were I thy bride, 
 Then the whole world beside 
 Were not too wide 
 
 To hold my wealth of love — 
 Were I thy bride. 
 
 Upon thy breast 
 My loving head would* rest, 
 As on her nest 
 
 The tender turtle dove — 
 Were I thy bride. 
 
 • This head of mine 
 
 •I 
 
 Would be one head with thine, 
 And in that shrine 
 
 Our happiness would dwell — 
 Were I thy bride. 
 
 And all day long 
 Our lives should be a song. 
 No grief, no wrong 
 
 Should make my heart rebel- 
 Were I thy bride. 
 
 The silvery flute 
 The melancholy lute, 
 i Were night owls hoot 
 
 To my love-whispered coo- 
 Were I thy bride. 
 
 The skylark's trill 
 , Were but discordance shrill 
 
 To the soft thrill 
 t Of wooing as I'd woo— 
 
 Were I thy bride. 
 
5 I 
 
 y ■-■ 
 
 «6 
 
 MeryLL re-enters; gives keys to Pk(EBE, who replteee thtm «< 
 Wilfred's girdU unnoticed by him. 
 
 The rose's sigh 
 Were as a carrion's cry 
 To lullaby 
 
 Such as I'd sing to thee^ 
 Were I thy bride. 
 A feather's press 
 
 Were leaden heaviness 
 To my caress. 
 
 But then of course you see 
 I'm not thy bride 1 
 
 [ExitVKKEBE. 
 
 Will. No, thou'rt not— not yett But, Lord, how she 
 woo'd ! I should be no mean judge of wooing, seeing that I 
 have been more hotly woo'd than most men. I have been woo'd 
 by maid, widow, and wife. I have been woo'd boldly, timidly, 
 tearfully, shyly — by direct assault, by suggestion, by implica- 
 tion, by inference, and by innuendo. But this wooing is not 
 of the common order : it is the wooing of one who must needs 
 wOo me, if she die for it I 
 
 [Exit WiLFRBD. 
 
 Enter Meryll, eautiou9ly,from Tower, 
 
 Mbr. {looking after tJbm.) The deed is, so far, safely ac- 
 complished. The sly boots, how she wheedled him ! What a 
 helpless ninny is a love-sick man ? He is but as a lute in a woman's 
 hands— she plays upon him whatever tune she will. But the 
 Colonel comes. P faith he's just in time, for the yeomen parade 
 here for his execution in two minutes 1 
 
 Enttr Fairfax, without beard and moustache, and dressed tn 
 
 Yeoman's uniform. 
 
 Fair. My good and kind friend, thou runnest a grave risk 
 for me. 
 
 Mbr. Tut, sir, no risk. Ill warrant none here will recog- 
 nise you. You make a brave Yeoman, sir ! So— this ruff is 
 too high, so — and the sword should hang thus. Here is your 
 halbert, sir ; carry it thus. The yeomen come. Now, remem-. 
 ber vou are my brave son, Leonard Meryll. 
 
26 
 
 Fair. If I may not bear mine own name, there is none 
 other I would bear so readily. 
 
 Mer. Now, sir, put a bold face on it ; for they come. 
 
 Enter Yeomen of the Ouard. 
 
 RECITATIVE.— Sergeant Meryll. 
 
 Ye Tower yeomen, nursed in war's alarms. 
 
 Suckled on gunpowder, and weaned on glory, 
 Behold my son, whose all-subduing arms 
 Have formed the theme of many a song and story I 
 Forgive his aged father's pride ; nor jeer 
 His aged father's sympathetic tear ! 
 
 {pretending to weq^.) 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Leonard Meryll I 
 
 Leonard Meryll ! 
 Dauntless he in time of peril ! 
 
 Man of power. 
 
 Knighthood's flower. 
 Welcome to the grim old Tower : 
 To the Tower, welcome thou I 
 
 RECITATIVE.— Fairfax. 
 
 Forbear, my friends, and spare me this ovation ; 
 I have small claim to such consideration : 
 The tales that of my prowess are narrated 
 Have been prodigiously exaggerated. 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Tis ever thus ! 
 ! Wherever valour true is found. 
 
 True modesty will there abound. 
 
 'Tis ever thus ! 
 Wherever valour true is found. 
 True modesty will therie abound. 
 
 COUPLETS. 
 
 i\ 
 
 I8T Yeoman. 
 
 Didst thou not, oh, Leonard Meryll ! 
 
 Standard lost in last campaign, 
 Rescue it at deadly peril — 
 
 Bear it bravely back again ? 
 
ne 
 
 'i7 
 
 p.) 
 
 ^ 
 
 
 Chorus. Leonard Meryl!, at his peril, 
 Bore it bravely back again 1 
 
 2ND Yeoman. Didst thou not, when prisoner taken, 
 
 And debarred from all escape, 
 Face, with gallant heart unshaken, 
 Death in most appalling shape ? 
 
 Chorus. Leonard Meryll faced his peril, 
 Death in most appalling shape I 
 
 Fair. Truly I was to be pitied. 
 
 Having but an hour to live, 
 I reluctantly submitted, 
 
 I had no alternative ! 
 Oh ! the facts that have been stated 
 
 Of my deeds of derring do, 
 Have been much exaggerated, 
 Very much exaggerated. 
 Monstrously exaggerated ! 
 
 Scarce a word of them is true 1 
 
 3Rb Yeoman. You, when brought to execution. 
 
 Like a demigod of yore, 
 With heroic resolution 
 
 Snatched a sword and killed a score I 
 
 Chorus. Leonard Meryll, Leonard Meryll 
 
 Snatched a sword and killed a score ! 
 
 4TH Yeoman. Then escaping from the ioemen, 
 
 Boltered with the blood you shed, 
 You, defiant, fearing no men, 
 
 Saved your honour and your head I 
 
 Chorus. Leonard Meryll, Leonard Meryll 
 Saved his honour and his head I 
 
 Fair. True, my course with judgment shaping, 
 Favoured, too, by lucky star, 
 I succeeded in escaping 
 
 Prison bolt and prison bar I 
 Oh I the tales that have been stated 
 
 , Of my deeds of derring do, 
 H^ve been much exaggerated, &Ct 
 
 V 
 
28 » 
 Chorus. They are not exaggerated, &c. 
 Enter Phcebe. She rushes to FAIRFAX and embraces him. 
 
 REGIT. 
 
 Phce. Leonard I 
 
 Fair, (puzzled.) I beg your pardon ? 
 
 Ph(E. Don't you know me ? 
 
 I'm little Phoebe ! 
 
 Fair, {etill puzzled.) Phoebe? Is this Phoebe ? 
 
 My little Phoebe ? (Aside.) Who the deuce may she 
 be ? It can't be Phoebe, surely ? 
 
 WiL. Yes, 'tis Phoebe— 
 
 Thy sister Phoebe ! 
 
 All. Aye, he speaks the truth ; 
 
 'Tis Phoebe ' 
 
 Fair, (pretending to recognize her.) Sister Phoebe ! 
 
 Phoe. Oh, my brother ! (Embrace.) 
 
 Fair. Why, how you've grown 1 I did not recognize you ! 
 
 Phce. So many years 1 Oh, brother ! (Embrace.) 
 
 Fair. Oh, my sister ! 
 
 WiL. Aye, hug him, girl ! There are three thou mayst 
 
 [hug— 
 Thy father and thy brother and— myself : 
 
 Fair. Thyself, forsooth ? And who art thou thyself? 
 
 WiL. Good sir, we are betrothed. (Fairfax turns enquir. 
 ingly to Phcebe.) 
 
 Phce. , Or more or less — 
 
 But rather less than more. 
 
 WiL. • To thy fond care 
 
 I do commend thy sister. Be to her 
 An ever- watchful guardian — eagle-eyed I 
 And when she feels (as sometimes she does feel) 
 Disposed to indiscriminate caress. 
 Be thou at hand to take those favours from her. 
 
 AtL Yes, yes, 
 
 Be thov at hand to take those favours from her. 
 
20 
 
 ie 
 
 u! 
 
 
 Phce. (in Fairfax's armt.) Yes, yes, 
 
 Be thou at hand to take those favours from ine. 
 
 TRIO.— Wilfred, Fairfax and Phcebe, 
 
 WiL. To thy fraternal care 
 
 Thy sister I commend : 
 From every lurking snar 
 
 Thy lovely charge defend ; 
 
 And to achieve this end, 
 Oh ! grant, I pray, this boon-~ 
 
 She shall not quit thy sight 
 From mom to afternoon — 
 
 From afternoon to night 
 From seven o'clock to two— 
 
 From two to eventide. 
 From dim twilight to 'leven at night 
 
 She shall not quit thy side i 
 
 All. Oh ! grant, I pray, this boon, &c. 
 
 Phce. So amiable I have grown, 
 
 So innocent as well, 
 That if Pm left alone 
 
 The consequences fell 
 
 No mortal can foretell. 
 So grant, I pray, this boon— 
 
 I shall not quit thy sight 
 From mom to afternoon — 
 
 From aftemoon to night 
 From seven o'clock till twa 
 
 From two till day is done, 
 From dim twilight to '!even at night 
 
 All kinds of risk I run. 
 
 All. So grant, I pray, this boon, &c. 
 
 Fair. With brotherly readiness, , 
 
 For my fair sister's sake, 
 At once I answer " Yes " — 
 That task I undertake— 
 My word I never break. 
 - I freely grant that boon. 
 And PU repeat my plight 
 
so 
 
 All. 
 
 From morn to afternoon — (kisa) 
 
 From afternoon to night, (kin) 
 
 From seven o'clock to two. (/tiss) 
 
 From two to evening meal, (kiss) 
 
 From dim twilight to 'leven at night, 
 
 That compact I will seal. {kis9 
 
 He ft'eely gran cs that boon, &c. 
 
 (The BeUofSt, Peter*9begiu8 to toll. The crowd entere; the 
 block i$ brought on to the itage, and the headsman takes hit place. 
 The Yeoman of the Cfuard form up, Fairfax and two others 
 entering the Cold Harbour Tower ^ to bring th(t prisoner to exe- 
 cution. The Lieutenant entert and takes his place, and teUs 
 <^Fairfax and two others to bring the prisoner to execution, 
 
 CHORUS — (to toUing accompaniment. J 
 
 The prisoner comes to meet his doom ; 
 The block, the beadsman, and the tomb. 
 The ftmeral bell begins to toll ; 
 May heaven have mercy on his soull 
 
 SOLO.— Elsie. 
 
 Oh, Mercy, Thou whose smile' has shone 
 So many a captive on ; 
 Of all immured within these walls, 
 The very worthiest falls. 
 
 REPRISE OF CHORUS. 
 
 The prisoner comes to meet his doom— 
 The block, the headsman, and the tomb. 
 The funeral bell begins to toll — 
 May Heaven have mercy on his soul ! 
 
 (Enter FAIRFAX and two other Yeomen from lower in great 
 
 excitement.) 
 
 9 
 
 Fair. My lord ! my lord ! I know not how to tell 
 
 The news I bear ! 
 I and my comrades sought the prisoner's cell — 
 He is not there ! 
 
 All. He is not there I 
 
 " They sought the prisoner's cell— he is not there 1 
 
8] 
 
 
 
 the 
 4U>e, 
 hert 
 exe- 
 telU 
 ion. 
 
 , ^ 
 
 TRIO.— Fairfax and two Yeomen, 
 
 As escort for the prisoner 
 
 We sought his cell in duty bound : 
 
 The double gratings open were, 
 No prisoner at all we found 1 
 
 We hunted high, we hunted low, 
 
 We hunted here, we hunted there— 
 
 The man we sought, a? truth will show, 
 ' Had vanished into empty air ! 
 
 All. Had vanished into empty air ! 
 
 The man they sought with anxious care 
 Had vanished into empty air ! . 
 
 Girls. Now, by our troth, the news is fair, 
 The man hath vanished into air. 
 
 All. As escort for the prisoner 
 
 They sought his cell in duty bound, ftc 
 
 LiEur. Astounding news ! The prisonar fled. 
 tTo Wilfred.) Thy life shall forfeit be instead I 
 
 . (Wilfred is arretted.) 
 
 Wilfred. My lord, I did not set him free, 
 I hate the man— my rival he ' 
 
 (Wilfred it taken a way J) 
 
 Meryll. The prisoner gone — I am all agape 1 
 
 Who could have helped him to escape f 
 
 PHfEBE. Indeed, I can't imagine who! 
 I've no idea at all — have you ? 
 
 Dame. Of his escape no traces lurk 
 
 Enchantment must have been at work ! 
 
 Elsib! Caside to Point.) What have I done ! Oh, woe is me 
 
 I am his wife, and he is free 1 
 
 Point. Oh, woe is you ? Your anguish sink ! 
 
 Oh, woe is we, I rather think 1 
 Oh, woe is w^, I rather think ! 
 Yes, woe is me^ 1 rather think I 
 
 Whate'er betide 
 
 You are his bride, 
 
 And I am left 
 
 Alone. — bereft ! 
 
8fl 
 
 Yes, woe is me, I rather think I 
 Yes, woe is m«, I rather think I 
 
 LfEUTBNANT. 
 All frenzied with de- 
 spair I rave, 
 The grave is cheat- 
 ed of its due. 
 Who is the misbe- 
 gotten knave < 
 Who hath contrived 
 this deed to.do ? 
 Let search be made 
 throughout the 
 land. 
 
 Or my vindictive 
 
 aiiger dread — 
 
 A thousand marks 
 
 to him I hand 
 
 Who brings him 
 
 here, alive or dead. 
 
 ENSEMBLE. 
 
 Elsib. 
 All frenzied with de- 
 spair I rave, 
 My angdtish rends 
 my heart in two. 
 Unloved, to him my 
 hand I gave ; 
 To him, unloved, 
 bound to be true f 
 Unloved, unknown, 
 < unseen, the brand 
 Of infamy upon his 
 
 head ; 
 A bride that's hus- 
 bandless, I stand 
 To all mankind for 
 ever dead I 
 
 Point. 
 All frenzied with de- 
 spair I rave, 
 My anguish rends 
 my heart in twa 
 Your hand to him 
 you freely gave. 
 It's woe to nUf not 
 
 woe to you I 
 My laugh is dead, 
 my heart unmanned, 
 A jester with a soul 
 
 of lead ! 
 A lover, loverless, I 
 stand. 
 To womankind 
 for ever dead I 
 
 The othensittg the Lieutenant's verse with altered pronouns. 
 At the endt Elsie faints in Fairfax's arms ; aU the 
 Yeomen andpopulaee rush off the stage in different diree* 
 tions, to hunt for thefugitioe^ having only the Headsman 
 mi the stage, unth Fairfax, and Elsie insensible im his 
 airmst 
 
 ACT DROP. 
 
 I 
 I 
 
 H-; 
 
 Ufi 
 
88 
 
 r 
 
 Us'-: 
 
 ACT II. 
 bCBNE. — Tower Oreen by MoonltghU 
 Women and Warders Discovered, 
 CHORUS OF W0M£N. 
 
 Night has spread her pall once more, 
 And the prisoner still is free : 
 
 Open is his dungeon door, 
 Useless now his dungeon key I 
 
 He has shaken oflF his yoke- 
 How, no mortal man can tell ! 
 
 Shame on loutish jailor-folk — 
 Shame on sleepy sentinel I 
 j^^^L. He has shaken off his yoke, &c, 
 
 SOLO.— Dame Carruthers. 
 
 Warders are ye ? 
 
 Whom do ye ward ? 
 Bolt, bar, and key. 
 
 Shackle and cord. 
 Fetter and chain, 
 
 Dungeon of stone. 
 All are in vain — 
 
 Prisoner's flown I 
 Spite of ye all, he is free— he is free ! 
 Whom do ye ward ? Pretty warders are yei ' 
 
 CHORUS OF WARDERS. 
 
 Up and down, and in and out, 
 Here and there and round about ; 
 Every chamber, every house, 
 Every chink that holds a mouse : 
 Every crevice in the keep, 
 Where a beetle black could creep ; 
 Every outlook, every drain, 
 Have we searched, but all in vain I 
 
84 
 
 WARDERS. 
 
 WOMEN AND CIVILIANS. 
 
 
 Warders are we. 
 
 Whom do we ward ? 
 Bolt, bar, and key, 
 
 Shackle and cord, 
 Fetter and chain, 
 
 Dungeon of stone, 
 All are in vain. 
 
 Prisoner's flown t 
 Spite of us all, he is free ! 
 
 he is free I 
 Whom do we ward ? Pretty 
 warders are we I 
 
 Warders, are ye ? 
 
 Whom do ye ward ? 
 Bolt, bar, and key ; 
 
 Shackle and cord. 
 Fetter and chain. 
 
 Dungeon of stone. 
 All are in vain. 
 
 Prisoner's flown I 
 Spite of ye all, he is free 
 
 he is free 1 
 Whom do ye ward ? Pretty 
 warders are ye I 
 
 Exeunt aU, 
 BnUr Jack Point, in low gpiriUy reading from a huge volume. 
 
 Point {reade). ** The Merrie Jestes of Hugh Ambrose. No. 
 7863. The Poor Wit and the Rich Councillor. A certayne 
 poor wit, being an hungered, did meet a well-fed councillor. 
 ' Marry, fool,' quoth the councillor, * whither away ?* * In truth,' 
 saidthe poor wag, ' in that I have eaten naught these two dayes, 
 I do wither away, and that right rapidly.' The councillor 
 laughed hugely, and gave him a sausage." Humph! The 
 councillor was easier to please than my new master, the Lieu- 
 tenant I would like to take post under that councillor. Ah ! 
 'tis but melancholy mumming when poor, heart-broken jilted 
 Jack Point must needs turn to Hugh Ambrose for original light 
 humour 1 
 
 Enter Wilfred, <deo in low epirite, 
 
 WiL. (jtigUng), Ah, Master Point 1 
 
 Point {ehanging hie manner). Ha 1 friend jailor— jailor that 
 wast — jailor that never shalt be more ! Jailor that jailed not, 
 or that jailed, if jail he did, so unjailorly that 'twas but jerry- 
 jailing, or jailing in joke— though no joke to him who, by un- 
 jailorlike jailing, did so jeopardize his jailorship. Come, 
 take heart, smile, laugh, wink, twinkle, thou tormentor that 
 tormentest none — thou racker that rackest not — thou pincher 
 out of place — come, take heart, and be merry, as I am ! — {aeid(\ 
 dolefully) — as I ami 
 
Thou hast a good 
 
 06 
 
 WiL. Aye, it's well for thee to laugh, 
 post, and hast cause to be merry. 
 
 Point, {bitterly.) Cause ? Have we not all cause ? Is not 
 the world a big butt of humor, into which all who will may 
 drive a gimlet ? See, I am a salaried wit ; and is th^re aught 
 in nature more ridiculous ? A poor, dull, heart-broken man, 
 who must needs be merry, or he will be whipped ; who must 
 rejoice lest he starve ; who must jest you, jibe you, quib you, 
 crank you, wrack you, riddle you, from hour to hour, from day 
 to day, from year to year, lest he dwindle, perish, starve, pine, 
 and die I Why, when there's naught else to laugh at, I laugh 
 at myself till I ache for it ! 
 
 WiL. Yet I have often thought that a jester's calling would 
 suit me to a hair. 
 
 Point. Thee? Would suit thee, thou death's head and 
 cross-bones ! 
 
 WiL. Aye, I have a pretty wit — a light, airy, joysome wit, 
 spiced with anecdotes of prison cells and the torture chamber. 
 Oh, a very delicate wit I I have tried it on many a prisoner, 
 and there have been some who smiled. Now it is not easy to 
 make a prisoner smile. And it should not be difficult to be a 
 good jester, seeing that thou art one. 
 
 Point. Difficult? Nothing easier. Nothing easier. At- 
 tend and I will prove it to thee ! 
 
 SONG.— Point. 
 
 Oh ! a private buffoon is a light-hearted loon. 
 
 If you listen to popular rumour ; 
 From morning to night he's so joyous and bright. 
 
 And he bubbles with wit and good humour ! 
 He's so quaint and so terse, both in prose and in verse ; 
 
 Yet though people forgive his transgression, 
 There are one or two rules that all family fools 
 Must observe if they love their profession t 
 There are one or two rules, 
 
 Half a dozen, may be^ 
 That all family fools, 
 Of whatever degree. 
 Must observe, if they love their profession. 
 
8G 
 
 If you w»c.ii to succeed as a jester you'll need 
 
 To consider each person's auricular ; 
 What is all right for B would quite scandalize G 
 
 (For C is so very particular) ; 
 And D may be dull, and £'s very thick skull 
 
 Is as empty of brains as a ladle ; 
 While F is F sharp, and will cry with a carp, 
 That he's known your best joke from his cradle 1 
 When your humour they flout, 
 
 You can't let yourself go ; 
 And it does put you out 
 When a person says " Oh, 
 I have known that old joke from my cradle P* 
 
 If yo<'.r master is surly, from getting up early 
 
 (And tempers are short in the morning), 
 An inopportune joke is enough to provoke 
 
 Him, to give you, at once, a month's warning. 
 Then if you refrain, he is at you again. 
 
 For he likes to get value for money. 
 He'll ask then and there, with an insolent stare, 
 " If you know that you're paid to be funny ?" 
 It adds to the task 
 
 Of a merryman's place, 
 When your principal asks. 
 With a scowl on his face. 
 If you know that you're paid to be funny ? 
 
 Comes a Bishop, maybe, or a solemn D.D. — 
 
 Oh, beware of his anger provoking I 
 Better not pull his hair — don't stick pins in his chair : 
 
 He don't understand practical joking. 
 If the jests that you crack have an orthodox smack. 
 
 You may get a bland smile from these sages ; 
 But should it, by chance, be imported from France, 
 Half-a-crown is. stopped out of your wages. 
 It's a general rule. 
 
 Though your zeal it may quencli, 
 If the family fool 
 Tells a joke that's too French, 
 H^f-a-crown is stoppc4 out of bis wages I 
 
 M 
 
 ha 
 
 ai 
 ai 
 
 F 
 
 n 
 tl 
 / 
 s 
 
 < > 
 
87 
 
 Though your head it may rack with a bilious attack. 
 
 And your senses with toothache you*re losing, 
 Don't be mopy and flat — ^they don't fine you for that, 
 
 If you're properly quaint and amusing. 
 Though your wife ran away with a soldier that day, 
 
 And took with her your trifle of money ; 
 Bless your heart, they don't mind, they're exceedingly kind — 
 They don't blame you — as long as you're funny. 
 It's a comfort to feel 
 
 If your partner should flit, 
 Though you sufter a deal. 
 They don't mind it a bit — 
 They don't blame you — so long as you're funny. 
 
 Point. And so thou wouldst be a jester, eh ? Now, listen ! 
 My sweetheart, Elsie Maynard, was secretly wed to this Fairfax 
 half an hour ere he escaped. i 
 
 Wiu She did well 
 
 Point. She did nothing of the kind, so hold thy peace and 
 perpend. Now^ while he liveth she is dead to me and I to her, 
 and so, my jibes and jokes notwithstanding, I am the saddest 
 and the sorriest dog in England. 
 
 Wll* Thou art a very dull dog indeed. 
 
 Point. Now, if thou wilt swear that thou didst shoot this 
 Fairfax while he was trying to swim across the river — it 
 needs but the discharge of an arquebus on a dark night — and 
 that he sank and was seen no more, I'll make thee the very 
 Archbishop of jesters, and that in two days' time 1 Now, what 
 sayestthou? 
 
 WiL. I am to li^ ? 
 
 Point. Heartily. But thy lie must be a lie of circum- 
 stance which we will support with the testimony of eyes, ea rs, 
 and tongue. 
 
 WiL. And thou wilt qualify me as a jester ? 
 
 Point. As a jester among jesters. I will teach thee all my 
 original songs, my self-constructed riddles, my own ingenious 
 paradoxes ; nay, ipore, I will reveal to thee the source whence I 
 get them. Now, what sayest thou ? 
 
 WiL. Why, if it be but a lie thou wantest of me, I hold it 
 Obeap enou((h| and I say yes, it is a bargain. 
 
88 
 
 -l^l'o 
 
 call 
 
 ENSEMBLE.— Point a»rf Wilfred. 
 Both. Hereupon we're both agreed,. 
 
 And all that we two 
 Do agree to 
 We'll secure by solemn deed, 
 To prevent all 
 Error mental. 
 
 \ ^ ion ElsicI*™ 
 } you J } are 
 
 With a story 
 
 Grim and gory; 
 
 How this Fairfax died, and all 
 
 lyouH^^^"« t° 
 
 jyj,^"*} to swear tol 
 
 > Tell a tale of cock and bull, 
 
 Of convincing detail full I , 
 Tale tremendous. 
 Heaven defend us 1 
 What a tale of cock and bull I 
 
 In return for J ^"'f own part 
 
 Undertaking, 
 To instruct I "^^ I in the art 
 
 (Art amazing, 
 Wonder raising) 
 Of a jester, jesting free. 
 Proud positicm — 
 High ambition 1 
 
 And a lively onejy^'^iyjbe 
 
 Wag-a-wagging, 
 Never flagging ! 
 
 Tell a tale of cock and bulh, %c 
 [Exeunt togttheti]' . 
 
 Bntsr Fairfax. 
 Fair. A day and a half gone, and no hews of poor Fairfax. 
 The dolts i They seek him everywhere save withma dottn^i^rcto 
 
 s 
 
89 
 
 fax. 
 
 of his dungeon. So I am free ! Free, but for the curbed haste 
 with which I hurried headlong into the bonds of matrimony with 
 — heaven knows whom. As far as I remember, she should have 
 been young ; but even had not her face been concealed by her 
 kerchief, I doubt whether, in my then plight,! should have taken 
 much note of her. Free I Bah ! The Tower bonds were but 
 a thread of silk compared with these conjugal fetters which I, 
 fool that I was, placed upon mine own hands. From the one I 
 broke readily enough — how to break the other I 
 
 SONG.— Fairfax. 
 
 Free from his fetters grim — 
 
 Free to depart ; 
 Free both in life and limb — j 
 
 In all but heart ! 
 Bound to an unknown bride 
 
 For good and ill ; 
 Ah, is not one so tied 
 
 A prisoner still? 
 
 Free, yet in fetters held 
 
 Till his last hour, 
 Gyves that no smith can weld, 
 
 No rust devour I 
 Although a monarch's hand 
 
 Had set him free. 
 Of all the captive band 
 
 The saddest he I 
 
 Enter Meryll. 
 
 Fair. Well, Sergt. Meryll, and how fares thy pretty charge, 
 Elsie Maynard? 
 
 Mer. Well enough, sir. She is quite strong again and 
 leaves us to-night. 
 I Fair. Thanks to Dame CarrUthers* kind nursing, eh ? 
 
 Mer. Aye, deuce take the old witch I Ah, 'twas but a sorry 
 trick you played me, sir, to bring the fainting girl to me. It 
 gave the old lady an excuse for taking up her quarters in my 
 house, and for the last two years I've shunned her like the 
 plague. Another day of it and she would have married met 
 Good Lord, here she is again I I'll e'en go— (jfoing). 
 
 Enter Dame Carruthbrs and Kate, her neice. 
 
/ 
 
 Nay, 
 
 40 
 
 Dame. Nay, Sergt. Meryll, don't go, I have somctfting of 
 grave import to say to thee. 
 
 Mer. (aside). It's coming. 
 
 Fair, (laughing). V faith, I think I'm not wanted here. 
 (Going). 
 
 Dame. Nay, Master Leonard, I've naught to say to thy 
 father that his son may not hear. 
 
 Fair, (aside). True. I'm one of the family ; I had forgotten. 
 
 Dame. 'Tis about this Elsie Maynnrd. A pretty girl. Mas- 
 ter Leonard. 
 
 Fair. Ay, fair as a peach blossom — what then ? 
 
 Dame. She hath a liking for thee, or I mistake not 
 
 Fair. With all my heart. She's as dainty a little maid as 
 you'll find in a midsummer day's march. 
 
 Dame. Then be warned in time, and give not thy heart to 
 her. Oh, I know what it is to give my heart to one who will 
 have none of it. 
 
 Mer. (aside). Ay, «^ knows all about that. (Aloud) And 
 why is my boy to take heed of her. She's a good girl, Dame 
 Carruthers. 
 
 Dame. Good enough, for aught I know. But she's no girl. 
 She's a married woman. 
 
 Mer. a married woman. Tush, old lady — she's promised 
 to Jack Point, the Lieutenant's new jester. 
 
 Dame. Tush in thy teeth, old man 1 As my niece Kate sat 
 by her bedside to-day, this Elsie slept, and as she slept she 
 moaned and groaned, and turned this way and that way — and, 
 " How shall I marry one I have never seen ?" quoth she—then, 
 " a hundred crowns I" quoth she — then, " Is it certain he will 
 die in an hour ?" quoth she — then, " I love him not, and yet I 
 am his wife t" quoth she. Is it not so, Kate ? 
 
 Kajb. Aye, mother, 'tis even so. 
 
 Fair. Art thou sure of all this ? 
 
 Kate. Aye, sir, for I wrote it all down on my tablets. 
 
 Dame. Now, mark my words : it was of this Fairfax she 
 spake, and he is her husband, or I'll swallow my kirtle t 
 
 Mbryll (aside,) Is this true, sir ? 
 
 Fair. True ? Why, the girl was raving I Why should she 
 marry a man who had but an hour to live? 
 
 Qi 
 
 E 
 bi 
 c< 
 w 
 
41 , 
 
 Dame. Marry ? There be those who would marry but for 
 a nJnute, rather than die old maids 1 
 
 Meryll (uiide.) Aye, I know one of them ! 
 
 QUARTETTE.— Kate, Fairfax, Dame Carruthers and 
 
 . Merylu 
 
 Strange adventure I Maiden wedded 
 To a groom she's never seen I 
 Never, never, never seen I 
 Groom about to be beheaded, 
 In an hour on Tower Green ! 
 
 Tower, Tower, Tower Green 1 
 
 Groom in dreary dungeon lying — ** 
 
 Groom as good as dead, or dying, 
 For a pretty maiden sighing — 
 Pretty maid of seventeen I 
 
 Seven — seven — seventeen I 
 
 Strange adventure that we're trolling : 
 Modest maid and gallant groom — 
 Gallant, gallant, gallant groom I— 
 ■^ While the funeral bell is tolling. 
 
 Tolling, tolling, Bim-a-boom 1 
 Bim-a, Bim-a, Bim-a-boom I 
 
 Modest maiden will not tarry ; 
 Though but sixteen year shts carry,- 
 She must marry, she must marry — 
 Though the altar be a tomb — 
 Tower — Tower — Tower tomb! 
 
 [Exeunt Dame Carruthers, Meryll, and Katb. 
 
 Fair. So my mysterious bride is no other than this winsome 
 Elsie I By my hand, 'tis no such ill plunge in fortune's lucky 
 bag ! I might have fared worse with my eyes open I But she 
 comesft Now to test her principles. 'Tis not every husband 
 who has a chance of wooing his own wife 1 
 
 Enter Elsib. 
 
 Fair. Mistress Elsie I 
 Elsie. Master Leonard 
 
 ...• ' 
 
42 
 
 Fair. So thou leavest us to-night ? 
 
 Elsie. Yes, Master Leonard. I have been kindly tended, 
 and I almost fear I am loth to go t 
 Fair. And this Fairfax. Wast thou glad when he escaped ? 
 
 Elsie. Why, truly Master Leonard, it is a sad thing that a 
 young and gallant gentleman should die in the very fulness of 
 his life. 
 
 Fair. Then, when thou didst faint in my arms, it was for 
 joy at his safety? 
 
 Elsie. It may be so. I was highly wrought, Master Leo- 
 nard, and I am but a girl, and so, when I am highly wrought, I 
 faint 
 
 Fair. Now, dost thou know? I am consumed with a 
 parlous jealousy ? 
 
 Elsie. Thou ? And of whom ? 
 Fair. Why, of this Fairfax, surely 1 
 
 Elsie. Of Colonel Fairfax? 
 
 Fair. Aye. Shall I be frank with thee? Elsie — I love 
 thee, ardently, passionately I (Elsie alarmed and surprised.) 
 Elsie, I have loved thee these two days — which is a long time 
 — and I would fain join my life to thine I 
 
 Elsie. Master Leonard t Thou art jesting 1 
 
 Fair. Jesting? May I shrivel up into raisins if I jest ! I 
 love thee with a love that is a fever — with a love that is a frenzy 
 — with a love that eateth up my heart ! What sayest thou ? 
 Thou wilt not let my heart be eaten up ? 
 
 Elsie, (atids.) Oh, mercy ! What am I to say ? 
 
 Fair. Dost thou love me, or hast thou been insensible these 
 two days ?" 
 
 Elsie. I Icve all brave men. 
 
 Fair. Nay, there is love in excess. I thank heaven there 
 are many brave men in England ; but if thou lovest them all, I 
 withdraw with my thanks. 
 
 Elsie. I love the bravest best But, sir, 1 maiy not listen— 
 I am not free — I — I am a wife I 
 
 Fair. Thou a wife ? Whose? His name ? His hours are 
 numbered— nay, his grave is dug, and his epitaph set up I 
 Come, his name? 
 
48 
 
 ElsiK. Oh, sir ! keep my secret — it is the only barrier that 
 Fate could set up between us. My husband is none other than 
 Colonel Fairfax. 
 
 Fair. The greatest villain unhung I The most ill-begotten, 
 ill-favoured, ill-mannered, ill-natured, ill-omened, ill-tempered 
 dog in Christendom. 
 
 Elsie. It is very like. He is naught to me — ^for I nevet saw 
 him. I was blindfolded, and he was to have died within the 
 hour ; and he did not die — ^and I am wedded to him, and my 
 heart is broken ! 
 
 I Fair. He was to have died, and he did not die ? The scoun- 
 drel 1 The perjured, traitorous villain ! Thou shouldst have 
 insisted on his dying first, to make sure. 'Tis the only way with 
 these Fairfaxes. 
 
 Elsii. I now wish I had. 
 
 Fair. {Atid*) Bloodthirsty little maiden I (Aloud.) A fig for 
 this Fairfex ! Be mine — he will never know — ^he dares not show 
 himself; and if he dare^ what art thou to him ? Fly with me, 
 Elsie— we will be married to-morrow, and thou shalt be the 
 happiest wife in England I 
 
 Elsib. Master Leonard I I am amazed ! Is it thus that 
 brave soldiers speak to poor girls ? Oh ! for shame, for shame 1 
 I am wed — not the less because I love not my husband. I am a 
 wife, sir, and I have a duty, and — oh, sir 1 thy words terrify roe 
 — ^they are not honest — th^ are wicked words, and unworthy 
 thy great and brave heart ! Oh, shame upon thee 1 shame upon 
 thee I 
 
 Fair. Nay, Elsie, I did but jest I spake but to try 
 
 {sho$ heard,) Bnter Merryll hustily. 
 
 MER.(l?«^t) Hark I What was that, sir ? 
 
 Fair. Why, an arquebos— 
 
 Fired froni the wharf, unless I much mistake. 
 
 Mkr. Strange — and at such an hour I What can it mean ? 
 
 . [/i» the nuantimt ihs Chorus have mUred, 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 ffdw wbnt can that have been— > 
 ^ ihot so late at night. 
 
1 1 
 
 I 
 
 44 
 
 Enough to cause affright ! 
 What can the portent mean ? 
 
 Are foemen in the land ? 
 
 Is London to be wrecked ? 
 
 What are we to expect ? 
 What danger is at hand ? 
 
 Yes, let us understand 
 
 What danger is at hand ! 
 
 Lieutenant enters, also Point and Wilfred. 
 
 Lieut. Who fired that shot ? At once the truth declare ! 
 WiL. My lord, 'twas I — to rashly judge forbear I 
 Point. My lord, 'twas he — to rashly judge forbear ! 
 
 DUET AND CHORUS.-~WiLFRED and Point. 
 
 WiL. Like a ghost his vigil keeping— 
 
 Point. • Or a spectre all-apalling— 
 
 WiL. I beheld a figure creeping— 
 
 Point. I should rather call it crawling— 
 
 WiL. He was jcreeping — 
 
 Point. He was crawling — 
 
 WiL. He was creeping, creeping— 
 
 Point. Crawling— 
 
 WiL. Not a.monient's hesitation — 
 
 I myself upon him flung, 
 With a hurried exclamation 
 To his draperies I hung. 
 Then we closed with one another 
 In a rough and tumble smother ; 
 Cokmd Fairfax and no other 
 Was the man to whom I clung 1 
 
 Fair. Colonel Fairfax and no other 
 
 Was the man to ivhom he dun t I 
 
 All. Colonel Fairfax and tio other 
 
 Was the man tp whom he clunj ! 
 Yfs— they c'osed v^ltV out another 
 
46 
 
 re! 
 
 Will 
 Point. 
 
 WiL. 
 
 Point. 
 
 WiL. 
 
 Point. 
 
 WiL. 
 
 Point. 
 
 WiL. 
 
 Point. 
 Wiu 
 
 All. 
 
 1) 
 
 WiL. 
 
 Point. 
 
 WiL. 
 
 All. 
 
 WiL. 
 
 Point. 
 
 WlL. 
 
 Point. 
 WiL. 
 
 ALU 
 
 In a rough and tumble smother ; 
 Colonel Fairfax and no other 
 
 Was the man to whom he clung I 
 
 After mighty tug and tussle — 
 
 It resembled more a struggle — 
 He, by dint of stronger muscle — 
 
 Or by some infernal juggle — 
 From my clutches quickly sliding— 
 
 I should rather calllt slipping — 
 With a view, no doubt, of hiding — 
 
 Or escaping to the shipping — 
 With a gasp, and with a quiver— 
 
 Pd describe it as a shiver — 
 
 He plunged headlong iti the river 
 And, alas, I cannot swim t 
 
 Ifs enough to mak^ one shiver, 
 With a gasp and with a quiver, 
 He plunged headlong in the river, 
 It was very brave of him ! 
 
 ♦ 
 
 Ingenuity is catching ; 
 
 With the view my king of pleasing, 
 Arquebus from sentry snatching — 
 
 I should rather call it seizing—- 
 
 With an ounce or two of lead 
 
 I despatched him through the head — 
 
 He despatched him through the head 
 
 I discharged it without winking, 
 Little time he lost in thinking. 
 Like 9. stone I saw him sinking-* 
 
 I should say a lump of lead. 
 Like a stone, my boy, I said- 
 Like a heavy lump of lead. 
 Atiyhoiv the man is dead. 
 
 Whether stone or lump of lead, 
 Arquc but from scmty scizingi 
 
46 
 
 With the view iiis king dI pleasing, 
 VVilfiod shct him through the head, 
 And he's very, very dead. 
 And it matters very little whether stone or lump of lead 
 It is very, very certain that he's very, very dead ! 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Hail ! the valiant fellow who 
 * Did this deed of derring do ; 
 
 Honours wait on such an one ; 
 By my head, 'twas bravely done I 
 
 REGIT.— Lieutenant. 
 
 The river must be dragged — nojime be lost ; 
 
 The body must be found at any cost. 
 
 To this attend without undue delay ; 
 
 . So set to work with what despatch ye may. 
 
 [Exit. 
 All. Yes, yes, 
 
 We'll set to work with what despatch we may 1 
 Four men raiie WilfIied, and carry him off on thdr shoulders, 
 
 CHORUS. 
 
 Hail the valiant fellow who i 
 
 Did this deed of derring do , 
 H<mours wait on such an one ; 
 - By my head, 'twas bravely done I 
 
 [Exeunt ail but ELSIE, Point, Fairfax, and Phcebe. 
 
 Point (to Elsie, who is weeping). Nay, sweetheart, be com- 
 forted. This Fairfax was but a pestilent fellow, and, as he had 
 to die, he might as well die tfaius as any other way. 'Twas a 
 good death. , 
 
 Elsie. Still he was my husband, and had he not been, he 
 was nevertheless a living man, and now he is dead ; and soj by 
 your leave, my tears may flow unchidden. Master Point 
 
 Fair. And thou didst see all this? 
 
 Point. Aye, with both eyes at once— this and that. The 
 testimony of one eye is naught— he may lie. But when it 
 is corroborated by the other, it is good evidence that none 
 
47 
 
 may gainsay. Here are both present in court, ready to swear 
 to him ! 
 
 Phce. But art thou sure it was Colonel Fairfax ? Saw you 
 his face ? 
 
 Point. Aye, and a plaguey ill-favoured face too. A very 
 hang-dog face — a felon face — a face to fright the he.idsm.in 
 himself, and make him strike awry. Oh, a plaguey bad face, 
 take my word for*!. (Fhcebe and Fairfax laugh.) How they 
 laugh ! 'Tis ever thus with simple folk — an accepted wit has 
 but to say, " Pass the mustard," and they roar their ribs out I 
 
 Fair, (aside.) If ever I come to life again thou ^halt pay for 
 this, Master Point 
 
 Point. Now, Elsie, thou art free to choose a^^am, so be- 
 hold me ; I am young and well-favoured. I have a pretty wit. 
 I can jest you, jibe you, quip you, crank you, wrack you, riddle 
 you — 
 
 Fair. Tush, man, thou knowest not how to woo. 'Tis not 
 to be done with time-worn je3ts and thread-bare -sophistries ; 
 with quips, conundrums, rhymes, and paradoxes. 'Tis an 
 art in itself, and must be studied gravely and conscien- 
 tiously. • . 
 TRIO.— Fairfax, Elsie, ani Phcebe. 
 
 Fair. A man who would woo a fair maid, 
 "" Should 'prentice himself to the trade. 
 And study all day, 
 ' " In methodical way, 
 
 How to flatter, cajole and persuade, 
 He should 'prentice himself at fourteen, 
 • ' And practice from morn to e'en ; 
 And when he's of age, 
 If he will, I'll engage. 
 He may capture the heart of a queen I 
 
 All. It is purely a matter of skill, 
 
 Which all may attain if they wilL 
 But every Jack, 
 He must study the knack 
 If he wants to make sure of his JilL .; 
 
 Elsie, if he's made the best use of his time, 
 
 His twig he'll so carefully line, ' '"" ^ 
 
48 
 
 ALU 
 
 Phoe. 
 
 That every bird 
 
 Will come down at his worr]. 
 Whatever its plumage and clime. 
 He must learn that the thrill of a touch 
 May mean little, or nothing, or much ; 
 
 It's an instrument rare, 
 
 To be handled with care. 
 And ought to be treated as such. 
 
 It is purely a matter of skill, &c 
 
 Then a glance may be timid or free, 
 It will vary in mighty degree, 
 
 From an impudent stare 
 
 To a look of despair 
 That no maid without pity can see ; 
 And a glance of despair is no guides- 
 It may have its ridiculous side : 
 
 It may draw you a tear 
 Or a box on the ear ; 
 You can never be sure till you've tried I 
 All. It is purely a matter of skill, &c. 
 
 Fair {asids to Point). Now, listen to me — ^"tis done thus — 
 (aloud) — Mistress Elsie, there is one here who, as thou knowest, 
 loves thee right well 1 
 
 Point, (ands.) That he does-bright well t 
 
 Fair. He is but a man .of poor estate, but he hath a loving, 
 honest heart He will be a true and trusty husband to thee, 
 and if thou wilt be his wife, thou shalt lie curled up in his heart, 
 like a little squirrel in its nest 
 
 Point {aside.) 'Tis a pretty figure. A maggot in a nut lies 
 closer, but a squirrel will da 
 
 Fair. He knoweth that thou wast a wife — an unloved and 
 unloving wife, and his poor heart was near to breaking. But 
 now that thine unloving husband is dead, and thou art free, he 
 would fain pray that thou wouldst hearken unto him, and give 
 him hope that thou wouldst be his t 
 
 Ph<e. {alarmed). He presses her hands — and he whispers in 
 her ear I Odds boddikins, what does it mean ? 
 
 Fair. Now, sweetheart, tell me— wilt thou be this poor 
 good fdloVs wife ? 
 
4d 
 
 Elsie. If the good, brave man— is he a brave man ? 
 
 Fair. So men say. 
 
 Point (nride). That's not true, but let it pass this once. 
 
 Elsie. If this brave man will be conte'nt with a poor penni- 
 less untaught maid — 
 
 Point (aside). Widow— but let that pass. 
 
 Elsie. I will be his true and loving wife, and that with ray 
 heart of hearts I 
 
 Fair. My own dear love ! {Embracing her.) i 
 
 Phce. {in great agitation.) Why, what's all this ? Brother — 
 brother — it is not seemly ! 
 
 Point (a/so alarmed.) (Aside.) Oh, I can't let that pass ! 
 (Aloud.) Hold, enough. Master Leonard I An advocate should 
 have his feei but methinks thou art overpaying thyself I 
 
 Fair. Nay, that is for Elsie to say. I promised thee 1 
 would show thee how to woo, and herein is the proof of the 
 virtue of my teaching. Go thou, and apply it elsewhere. 
 (Phcebe bursts into tears.) 
 
 QUARTETTE.— Elsie, Fairfax, Phcebe, and Point. 
 
 Elsie and Fair. 
 
 All. 
 
 When a wooer 
 
 Goes a-wooing. 
 Naught is truer 
 
 Than his joy. 
 Maiden hushing, 
 
 All his suing — 
 Boldly blushing — 
 
 Bravely coy I 
 
 Oh, the happy days of doing ! 
 Oh, the sighing and the suing! 
 When a wooer goes a-wooing, 
 Oh, the sweets that never cloy I 
 
 PH(E. (weeping.) 
 
 When a brother 
 Leaves his sister 
 
 For another, 
 Sibter weeps. 
 
M 
 
 Tears that trickl^ 
 
 Tears that blister— 
 'Tis but mickle / 
 
 Sister reaps ! 
 
 All. Oh, the doing and undoing, 
 
 Ol^ the sighing and the suing, 
 When a brother gx)es a wooing, 
 And a sobbing sister weeps ! 
 
 Point. When a jester 
 
 Is out-witted. 
 Feelings fester 
 
 Heart is lead ! 
 Food for fishes 
 
 Only fitted, 
 Jester wishes 
 
 He was dead 1 
 
 All. Oh, the doing and undoing,] 
 
 Oh, the sighing and the suing. 
 When a jester goes a-wooing, 
 And he wishes he was dead I 
 
 [Exsunt all but Phcebb, who renuiim weeping. 
 
 Phcb. And I helped that man to escape, and I've kept his 
 secret, and pretended that I was his dearly loving sister, and 
 done everything I could think of to make folk believe I was his 
 loving sister, and this is his gratitude I Before I pretend to be 
 sister to anybody again, I'll turn nun, and be sister to every> 
 body — one as much as another. 
 
 BnUr Wilfred. 
 
 WiL. In tears, ch ? What a plague art thou grizzling for 
 now? 
 
 Phce. Why am I grizzling? Thou hast often wept for 
 jealousy— »weU 'tis for jealousy I weep now. Aye, yeljow, bil- 
 ious, jaundiced jealousy. So make the most of that^ Master 
 Wilfred, 
 
61 
 
 
 ng, 
 
 : his 
 and 
 9 his 
 :o be 
 ►'ery- 
 
 for 
 
 for 
 
 bil- 
 
 ister 
 
 WiL. But I have never given thee cause for jealousy. The 
 Lieutenant's cook-maid and I are but the merest gossips. 
 
 Phce. Jealous of thee t Bah I I'm jealous of no craven 
 cock-on-a-hill, who crows about what he'd do an' he dared. I 
 am jealous of another and a better man than thou — set that 
 down, Master Wilfred. And he is to marry Elsie Maynard, 
 the little pale fool, set that down, Master Wilfred, and my heart 
 is well nigh broken ! There, thou hast it all ! Make the most 
 of it! 
 
 WiL. The man thou lovest is to. marry Elsie Maynard ? 
 Why, that is no other than thy brother, Leonard Meryil I 
 
 Phce. {aside) Oh, mercy, what have I said ? 
 
 WiL. Why, what manner of brother is this, thou lyin.qf little 
 jade. Speak! Whom is this man whom thou hist called 
 brother, and fondled, and coddled, and kissed — with my con- 
 nivance, too ! Oh ! Lord, with my connivance ! Ah ! should 
 it be this Fairfax ! (Phcebe siarU.) It is ! It is this accurslhd 
 Fairfax ! It's Fairfax! Fairfax, wha— 
 
 Phcebe. Whom thou hast just shot through the head, and 
 who lies at the bottom of the river I 
 
 WiL. A — I — I may have been mistaken. We are but falli- 
 ble mortals, the best of us. But I'll make sure — I'll make sure 
 
 Phce. Stay— one word. I think it cannot be Fairfax — mind 
 I say I think — because thou hast just slain Fairfax. But 
 whether he be Fairfax or no Fairfax, he is to marry Elsie — and 
 — as thou hast shot him through the head, and he is dead, be 
 content with that, and I will be thy wife ! 
 
 Wil* Is that sure ? 
 
 Phce. Aye, sure enough, for there's no help for it ? Thou 
 art a very brute — but even brutei must marry I suppose. 
 
 Wil« My beloved I (embraoes her.) 
 
 Phce. (aside.) Ugh 1 
 
 Enter Leonard, hastily, 
 
 Leon. Phcebe, rejoice, for I bring glad tidings. Colonel 
 Fairfax's reprieve wa<« signed two days since, but it was foully 
 |i)4 maliciously kept back by Sectary Pol^whis^e, who 49- 
 
52 
 
 signed that it should arrive after the Colonel's death. It hath 
 just come to hand and it is now in the Lieutenant's possession. 
 
 Phce. Then the Colonel is free ? Oh kiss ma, kiss me, my 
 dear. ' Kiss me, again, and again I 
 
 WiL. (dancing with fury). Ods, bobs, death o' my life t Art 
 thou ntad ! Am / mad ? Are we all mad ? 
 
 Phce. Oh my dear — m.y dear, I am well nigh crazed with 
 joy. (kissing Leonard). 
 
 WiL. Come away from him, thou hussy — thou jade — thou 
 kissing, clinging cockatrice ! And as for thee, sir, I'll rip thee 
 like a herring for this I I'll skin thoe for it I I'll cleave thee 
 to the chine ! I'll— Oh ! Phoebe ! Phoebe ! Phoebe ! Who is 
 this man ? 
 
 Ph(E. Peace, fool, he is my brother I n 
 
 WiL. Another brother! Are there any more of them? 
 Pfoduce them all at once, and let me know the worst ! 
 
 PH(£. This is the real Leonard, dplt ; the other was but 
 his substitute. The real Leonard, I say — my father's own 
 son ! 
 
 WiL. How do I know this? Has he "brother" writ large 
 on his brow ? I misttiist thy brothers ! Thou art but a false 
 jade I 
 
 Exit Leonard. 
 
 Phce. Now, Wilfred, be just. Truly I did deceive thee be- 
 fore — but it was to save a precious life — and to save it, not for 
 me, but for another. They are to be wed this very day. Is not 
 this enough for thee ? Come — I am thy Phoebe~thy very own 
 — and we will be wed in a year — or two — or three, at the most, 
 Is not that enough for thee ? 
 
 Enter MSRYLL, excitedly^ followed by Dame Carruthers 
 (who listens unobserved.) 
 
 Mbr. Phoebe, hast heard the brave news ? 
 
 Phce. (still in Wilfred's arm*.) Aye, father. 
 
 Mer. I'm nigh mad with joy I (seeing Wilfred.). Why, 
 whnt's all this ? 
 
 PtidS.. Oh, father, he discovered our secret through my follv^ 
 §n(} the price of silence j?— r • 
 
 be 
 
 foU^ 
 
 Da^ 
 
^ 
 
 WiL. Phoebe's heart 
 
 Phce. Oh, dear no — Peoebe's hand. 
 
 WiL. It's the same thing ! 
 
 Ph(E. Is it ? 
 
 [Exeunt Wilfred and Phcebe. 
 
 Mer. (looking after them.) 'T is pily, but the olonel had to 
 be saved at any cost, and as thy folly revealed our secret, thy 
 folly must e'en suffer for it ! (Dame Carruthers comes down.) 
 Dame Carruthers ! 
 
 Dame. So this is a plot to shield this arch-fiend, and I have 
 detected it. A word from me, and three heads besides his 
 would roll from their shoulders. . 
 
 Mer. Nay, Colonel Fairfax is reprieved. (Aside.) Yet if 
 my complicity in his escape were known ! Plague on the old 
 meddler! There's nothing for it! — (alud — Hush, pretty ore! 
 Such bloodthirsty words ill-become those cherry lips I (4 side.) 
 Ugh! 
 
 Dame, (bashfully.) Sergeant Meryll t 
 
 Mer. Why look ye, chuck, for many a month I've — I've 
 thought to myself — " There's snug love savmg up in that 
 middle-aged bosom for someone, and why not for thee— that's 
 me — so take heart and tell her— that's thee — that thou — that's 
 me — lovest her — thee — and— and — well, I'm a miserable old 
 man, and I've done it — and that's me I" But not a word about 
 Fairfax ! The price of thy silence is— 
 
 Dame, Meryll's heart ? 
 
 Mer. No, Meryll's hand. 
 
 Damb. It's the same thing. 
 Mer. /fit? 
 
 DUET— Meryll and Dame Carruthers. 
 
 Damb. Rapture, rapture ! 
 
 When love's votary 
 Flushed with capture, 
 Seeks the notary, 
 Joy and jollity 
 Then is polity ; 
 Reigns frivolity t 
 Hapture, rapture I 
 
64 
 
 Mer. Doleful, doleful I 
 
 When humanity, 
 With its soul full 
 Of satanity, 
 
 Courting privity, 
 Down declivity 
 Seeks captivity 1 
 Doleful, doleful 1 
 
 Dame. Joyful, joyful! 
 
 When virginity 
 Seeks, all coyful, 
 Man's affinity ; 
 
 Fate all flowery. 
 Bright and bowery 
 Is her dowery I 
 Joyful, joyful I 
 
 Mer. Ghastly, ghastly ! 
 
 When man, sorrowful. 
 Firstly, lastly. 
 
 Of to-morrow full. 
 After tarrying. 
 Yields to harrying— 
 Goes a-marrying. 
 Ghastly, ghastly! 
 
 FINALE. 
 
 Enter Beefeaters^ Women and Elsie a» Bride, 
 
 CHORUS OF WOMEN. 
 
 (Elegiacs.) 
 
 Comes the pretty young bride, a-blushing, timidly shrinking — 
 Set all thy fears aside — cheerily, pretty young bride ! 
 
 Brave is the youth to whom thy lot thou art willingly linking I 
 Flower of valour is he — ^loving as loving can be ! 
 
 Brightly thy summer is shining. 
 Fair is the dawn of the day ) 
 Take him, be true to him— 
 Tender his due to him — 
 (ionour Mna, Iqyc 1^4 obey ( 
 
$$ 
 
 TRIO.— Phcebe, Elsie, t^nd Dame Carrvther& 
 
 'Tis said that joy in full perfection 
 Comes only once to womankind — 
 
 That, other times, on close inspection, 
 Some lurking bitter we shall find. 
 
 If this be so, and men say truly. 
 
 My day of joy has broken duly. 
 With happiness my soul is cloyed — 
 This is my joy-day unalloyed 1 
 
 All. Yes, yes. 
 
 This is her joy-day unalloyed 1 
 
 Flourish^-enter Lieutenant. 
 
 Lieut. Hold, pretty one I T bring to thee 
 
 News — ^good or ill, it is for thee to say. 
 Thy husband lives — and he is free. 
 And comes to claim his bride this very day ! 
 
 Elsie. No I no ! recall those words — ^it cannot be ! 
 Leonard, my Leonard, come, oh, come to me ! 
 Leonard, my own — my loved one — where art thou? 
 I knew not how I loved thine heart till now I 
 
 Evumand PHOon. 
 
 Oh, day of terror 1 daj of 
 
 teai-s I 
 What f«artul tidings greet 
 
 mine cars? 
 Oh, Leonard, dome thou 
 
 to my side, 
 And oloim me as thy 
 
 loving bride. 
 
 ENSEMBLE. 
 
 Choriw and Othibs. 
 
 Oh, day of terror ! day of 
 
 tearsi 
 What words are these 
 
 that greetxmr ears ? 
 Who is the man who, in 
 
 his pride. 
 So boldly claims thee as 
 
 his bride? 
 
 LnniT. and Tom, 
 
 Ck>me, dry these unbe» 
 
 ooming tears, 
 Most Joyful tidings greet 
 
 thine ears, 
 nie man to whom thou 
 
 artalUed 
 Appears to claim thee t» 
 
 his bride. 
 
 Floui'ith, Enter COLONEL Fairfax, handsomely dressed^ and 
 attended by other Gentlemen. 
 
 Fair, {slemly.) All thought of Leonard Meryll set aside. 
 Thou art mine own I I claim thee as my 
 bride. 
 
 Elsie. 
 
 A suppliant at thy feet I fall, 
 
 Thine heart will yield to pity's call 1 
 
B6 
 
 Fair. Mine is a heart of massive rock, 
 
 Unmoved by sentimental shock. 
 
 All. Thy husband he ! 
 
 Elsie. Leonard, ny loved one — come to me 
 
 They bear me hence away ! 
 But though they take me far from thee, 
 My heart is thine for aye ! 
 My bruised heart, 
 My broken heart, 
 Is thine, my own, for aye I 
 
 {To Fairfax.) Sir, I obey, 
 
 I am thy bride ; 
 But ere the fatal hour 
 
 I said the say 
 That placed me in thy ppwer, 
 
 Would I had died 1 
 Sir, I obey! 
 
 I am thy bride ' 
 
 (Looks up and recognizes Fairfax.) Leonard I 
 
 Fair. My own ! 
 
 Elsie. Ah I (embrace J 
 
 Elsie & ( With happiness my soul is cloyed, 
 Fair. I This is my joy-day unalloyed ! 
 
 All. Yes, yes. 
 
 With happines's their souls are cloyed. 
 This is their joy-day unalloyed ! 
 
 Point. Oh thoughtless crew I 
 
 Ye know not what ye do ! 
 Attend to me, and shed a tear or two— 
 For I have a song to sing, 1 
 
 All. Sing me your song, 1 &c. 
 
 Point. It is sung to the moon 
 
 By a love-lorn loon, 
 Who fled from the mocking throng, O I 
 
67 • 
 
 It's the song of a merryman moping mum, 
 Whose soul was sad and whose glance was glum, 
 Who sipped no sup and who craved no crumb, 
 As he sighed for the love of a ladye ! 
 
 All. Heighdy ! heighdy I 
 
 Misery me, lackadaydy I 
 He sipped no sup and he craved no crumb, 
 As he sighed for the love of a ladye I 
 
 Elsie^ I have a song to sing, 1 
 
 All. Sing me your song, 01, 
 
 Elsie. It is sung with the ring 
 
 Of the songs maids sing 
 Who love with a love life long, O I 
 It's the song of a merrymaid, peerly proud. 
 Who loved a lord and who laughed aloud 
 At the moan of a merryman moping mum, 
 Whose soul was sad and whose glance was glum. 
 Who sipped no sup and who craved no crumb. 
 As he sighed for the love of a ladye ! 
 
 ALL. Heighdy 1 heighdy I 
 
 Misery me, lackadaydy ! 
 He sipped, no sup and he craved no crumb. 
 As he sighed for the love of a ladye I 
 
 Curtain, 
 
 ■■■■•/■ 
 
 ■ -•- ' ■■s^. 
 
SELECTED LIST 
 
 OF 
 
 New and Popular Songs 
 
 FOB SEASON 1888-9. 
 
 The Old Wherry. A.H.Behrend 40 
 
 A great anooegfi. Suitable for medium Toloe. 
 
 In Sweet September Hope Temple 40 
 
 A charming love ballad. 
 
 The Snowy-breasted Pearl .- Joseph Bobinson 40 
 
 An old Irish air. In keys to snit all voices. 
 
 Heaven and Earth O, Pintuti 50 
 
 A sacrod song for baritone or meiso-soprano. 
 
 Emmanuel (God with ns) ,-. Paul Rodney 40 
 
 By the composer of " CaWsry." 
 
 Serenade O, Jenun 50 
 
 A splendid tonor song. Bare to be popular. 
 
 The Goodwin Sands Stephen Adanu 60 
 
 A st!ri ins sea'song for baritone. 
 
 Beauty's Eyes (with violin obligate) F. P, Toeti 50 
 
 The latest song by (this suocessf nl composer. 
 
 We'll Keep the Old Grey Mare, John J. L, Mottoy 40 
 
 Suitable for contralto voice. 
 
 April (Chanson d'Avril) A» Goring Thomas 60 
 
 With both English and French words. For soprano or tenor. 
 
 Lightly, Lightly (boat song and chorus) .....^. Ohassaigne 40 
 
 From the new opera Nadgy. 
 
 We are the Deities Dramatic F, Ohassaigne 40 
 
 From ibenew opera Na<igy. 
 
 Anglo-Canadian Hasle Publtoliers* A8s*n, L'd, 
 
 13 RIOHCMOND ST. WB8T, TORONTO. 
 
 OoK new 68-page catalogue, comprising music for every instrument 
 
 mailed free on application. 
 
gfiLECTEH UgT Of 
 
 Nevv^ Popular Dance Music 
 
 FOR SEASON 1888-9. 
 
 Maijorie Walta P. Buenlossi CO 
 
 By he oump ser of "Nii,ht und orn" an 1 "Mod Amuar" Wal les. 
 
 The Dream Waltz May OntUre 60 
 
 Hy the composer of "K»ti iua Walts" and "Buffalo Bill Polka." 
 
 Elaine Waits Caroline Lowthian 60 
 
 By <h« coiupoeer of "Bitter Bweetf and *' Vecetia" Wal ces. 
 
 The Doye Waltz Fahian Rose 60 
 
 By the compoier of celebrated "Ivy Wa'ti." 
 
 Whisper Low Waltz A, G. Growe 60 
 
 By the composer of "3<.e Saw "and "Fairie YoioeB" Wultzes. 
 
 Sweet Vows Waltz Otto Boeder 60 
 
 By the composer of "Love's Dreamland" and "Gon lolier" Waltna. 
 
 Daddy Waltz (on Behrend's Song) K Bucaheri 60 
 
 By thecompa er ot :he enormously gacoeisfal "La Qitaua Walla.'* 
 
 The Gatden of Sleep Waltz P. Bucalotsi 60 
 
 On iKidore de Lara's mo t saco. ssful •;jng. 
 
 Dorothy Lancers (on the oelebrated opera) B, CorleU 40 
 
 Specially arranged for Bombuy or ifaratogn Lanoers. 
 
 They all Love Jack Lancers LiddeU 40 
 
 Specially arranged for i ' ombay or Saratoga LanCi ra. 
 
 Ring o' Bells Polka Caroline Lowthian 40 
 
 By Uie composer of «hH celebrated " Black and Tan Polka." 
 
 The Saints Pelka March Otto Boeder 40 
 
 By the composer of the "Che' sea China Polka. '^ 
 
 Anglo Canadian Music Publishers Assoon, Id. 
 
 13 BIOHMOND ST. WBST, TORONTO. 
 
 Cor new 68*paRe Catalogue, comprising the most popolar Masio of 
 |he dtt^, mailed free on application. 
 
IMMENSE SUCCESS! 
 
 GONDOLIER WALTZ, 
 
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 THE DOVE WALTZ, 
 
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 (BUCALOSSI.) 
 
 Played with immense success at all the 
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 Or of the 
 
 Anglo Canadian Music Publishers Assoc'n, Ld. 
 
 13 RIOHMOND ST. WB3T, TORONTO. 
 
POPUUB BARITONE S0II6S. 
 
 A Song of a Soldier Michael Watson 50 
 
 Ask Nothing More Theo. MarziaU 40 
 
 OkadeDaval. J. L. MoUoy 50 
 
 Krst in the Field Theo, Bonheur 40 
 
 Heaven and Barth G. Pinsuti 50 
 
 Jackets o' Blae.~. J. A. Macmeikan 40 
 
 Never Despair J. L. Molloy 60 
 
 On the AoUing Wave ..........Godfrey Murka 50 
 
 OntontheDeep F.N. L&hr 50 
 
 Simon Sly i * .....,.:.J. L, MoUoy 60 
 
 The Boys in Bine.. H. TroUr$ 60 
 
 The Qoodwin Sands Stephen A ehms 50 
 
 The Pedlar : F. N, L&hr 40 
 
 Tha Skipper W, H, Jude 40 
 
 The Snowy Breasted Pearl Joseph Bobinson 40 
 
 Time and Tide Paul Rodney 40 
 
 Vanderdecken Stt^hen Adams 60 
 
 MAT BB OBTAINED OF ALL MUSIO OBALEBS OB OF TBS 
 
 Anglo-Canadian Hosle Pnblisliers* iss'n, Id. 
 
 
 li mCJHMOND ST. WEST, TORONTO. 
 
THE SULTAN OF MOCHA,' 
 
 OOMIO OPERA, 
 
 BT AIiFBBD OBXjIjIQR. 
 
 Vooal Soore II 00 | Piano Score 75 
 
 SONGS. 
 
 Oloie Thoa Oentle Sleep (Slamber BOiig)i £^ Jk F 40 
 
 The Letter Soog, £6 40 
 
 I Beally am so Sleepy, G k B6 40 
 
 'Twaa Sad when I and Dolly Parted, F 40 
 
 Unxeqnited Love, G k B6 40 
 
 I LoTO the Ocean, F 40 
 
 Woman's Bights. 40 
 
 Throogh Storm and through Tempests (Drinking SoDg) ... 40 
 
 The Pensioner's Ghoms, D 40 
 
 INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC. 
 
 WaltB 60 Qnadrille 60 
 
 Lancers 60 Fantasia 60 
 
 Galop 50 da. Daet 60 
 
 XBT 
 
 WOBDS BT 
 
 H. B. FARNIE. 
 
 OPBBA OOMIQTJB. 
 
 MUSlt BT 
 
 AUDBAN. 
 
 Vooal Soobb k........... |1 50 
 
 LoTo IfWi Goide (Walts Song) , 
 
 Jasper's Jacket (Rustic Diity) 
 
 Watch Always at Thy Lattice (Gan/iOnet). 
 
 When Logs on the Ingle (Mill Song) 
 
 Sonny Sonth 
 
 The Plain Potato Fable (Comic) 
 
 60 
 50 
 40 
 50 
 40 
 50 
 
 Walts 60 Polka 50 Lancers. 
 
 50 
 
 Aiigki-CaMillaii Ha^ic Pabllshers' Am*ii, Ld. 
 
 13 BJQHMOND STBBBT WB3T, TORONTO. 
 
THE NEW AND SUCCESSFUL COMIC OPERA, 
 
 V ■ 
 
 "ERMINIE" 
 
 Writen by Harry Paulton and Claxson Bellamy. 
 Music by ED. J A KOBO WSKL 
 
 VOCAL SCORE %l 25 
 
 PIANO SCORE 76 
 
 LIBRETTO 16 
 
 VOCAL MUSIC. 
 
 A Soldier's Song 40 
 
 At Midnight on My Pillow... 40 
 
 Darkest the Hour 40 
 
 Lullaby 40 
 
 The Sighing Swain 40 
 
 What the Dicky Birds Say 40 
 
 When LoTe is Yoan^t < 40 
 
 Downy Jail Birds (Poet) 40 
 
 INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC. 
 
 Gavotte ......E. Jakobowtki 40 
 
 Lancers..... E, Jakobowtki 60 
 
 March E. Jakobowtki 40 
 
 Polka (Illustrated) E. Jakobowtki 60 
 
 Qnadrille (lUnstrated) O. Coote 60 
 
 Waltz E. Jakobowtki 60 
 
 Selection W, WinUrbotUm 76 
 
 Fantasia for Violin and Piano H. Fartner I 00 
 
 Ai%kh€iiiadlanllttdcPiibltehers*AMictetl«ii^ 
 
 IS KICWMOND ST. WBST. TOBONTO. 
 
5:^- 
 
 THE MmABO; 
 
 OB 
 
 THE TOWN OP TITIPU. 
 
 i 
 
 WORDS BT MU8I0 BT 
 
 W. 8. GILBERT. ARTHUR SULLIVAN. 
 
 VOCAL SCORE #1 00 
 
 do. (boards) '. 1 26 
 
 PIANOFORTE SCORE 75 
 
 LIBRETTO 26 
 
 VOCAL MUSIC. 
 
 The Snn Whose Rays 60 
 
 They Never Woald be Missed : „ 60 
 
 Brightly Dawns Oor Wedding Day (&Iadrigal for four 
 
 yoioes). 25 
 
 Three Little Maids from School (Trio) 26 
 
 The Mikado's Song 60 
 
 Hearts do not Break 60 
 
 WiUow, TitWiUow 40 
 
 PIANOFORTE ARRANGEMENTS. 
 
 Winterbottom's Selection, as played by all the Military 
 
 Bands ^ 76 
 
 Kobe's Pantalgia 76 
 
 do. do. Duet 1 00 
 
 Boytou Smith's Fantasia , 76 
 
 Smallwood's Fantasia 76 
 
 DANCE MUSIC— Arbanoeo by P. Bugalossi. 
 
 Qaadrille. Solo50o. Daet 75c. Waltz. Solo OOo. Duet 76 
 Lancers. Solo 60o. Daet 90o. Polka. Solo 50o. 
 
 VIOLIN. 
 
 Selection 60 
 
 VIOLIN AND PIANO. 
 Farmer's Mikitdo 1 00 
 
 ABjpaGaaaffiaQ Music Poblisbers' As«N}iidii% 
 
 la itIQHMONP STBBBT WB8T, TOBONTO. 
 
 
 
 
50 
 60 
 
 25 
 26 
 50 
 50 
 40 
 
 ; J.'. 
 
 ymp^^ 
 
 ^■■'it-f 
 
 i^W&B0» 
 
 AKTii^^^Wt^^ 
 
 76 
 76 
 1 00 
 76 
 75 
 
 76 
 
 60 
 1 00 
 
 1% 
 
TheTeomenoftheGnard, 
 
 OR 
 
 THE MERRYMAN AND HIS MAID. 
 
 WRITTEN BY COMPOSED BT 
 
 W.S. GILBERT. ARTHUR SULLIVAN. 
 
 • ■ ■/' ■ ■ 
 
 VOCAL SCORE %1 00 
 
 PIANO SCORE., 76 
 
 LIBRETTO.... 26 
 
 BANCS IIVSIC. 
 
 WALTZ, by Bucaloss:............. 60 
 
 LANCERS, do 60 
 
 QUADRILLE, do 60 
 
 « mm I 
 
 ■ ■ ■ I , 
 
 Tbe Anglo-Canadian Music Pnblisliers' Ass'n, Ld. 
 
 13 BIOHMOND ST. W]i^|||TOBONTa 
 
 ■ ■ ■ ,' ' ■'))?'