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Photographic

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'^]J^\/''^

^^^^^^^K1

■f.

AW]

MAE

'N A NARI
DURING I

A NOVICE, an;

THE HOTEL

WITH ADB

TO WHICH

SIX MONTHS'

BY Kt

''Come out of
takers of her sin

piagues."-.Rev.

W.
a6, Pate]

AND ALl

AWFUL DISCLOSURES

MARIA MONK,

A8 BXHIBITBD

IN A NARRATIVE OF HER SUFFERINGS

DURING A RBSIDBNCB OP PIVE YEARS AS

A NOVICE, AND TWO TEARS AS A BLACK NUN, IN

THE HOTEL DIEU NUNNERY AT MONTREAL.

WITH ADDITIONAL INFORMATION.

TO WHICH IS ADDED, THE NUN ; OR,

SIX MONTHS' RESIDENCE IN A CONVENT.

BY REBECCA THERESA REED,

' Come out of her my people, that ye be not par- '
takers of her sins, ana that ye receive not of her
plagues."—* Rev. xviii. 4.

LONDON :

W. WCHOLSON & SONS, Limited,

a6, Paternoster Square, E.C.,

AND ALBION WORKS, WAKEFIELD.

!l' '

oiiss

Iv !■ hoped thai
■oppoM thftt iti
thai I have delil
doahrad, that tb(
as a ToloDtaryl
whioh ara
nhieh aha haa a|
her paat azpeilaj
riorofthauotai
of the Roman
My faalinga i
raooUaetionofwl
day I have Uttta

Elaaaing laeollc
now not what i
what will ha the
among atrangera,!
the tnith, ao far i
they an general
that any fiMta whJ
worda whene?er t
the Hotel Dien li
ahle e^denee tha
floe, giTon in thia
them; forwhatei
ehangea whieh n<
toally eoneeal; a
in that Iiiatitatio]
There are litini

3 leak, without fei
blythefarteetimi
eonikrm myatatei
nddeetoaeaatlil
now? or will the]
SoperlorB have m
hi the eella have i
Bi^ haa been ail«
the haa time to a<

PR£FAC£.

Iv !■ hoped that th« reader of the enenlnfr namUTO will not
■appoie that it la a Action, or that the aeenea and peraoni
that I haTO delineated, had not a real exiatenoe. It la alao
deaired, that the author of thia Tolnme may he regarded not
as a tolnntttry nartioipator in the Tory goilty tranaactiona
whleh are deaenhed; bm leeeiTO sympathy for the triala
nhich she haa endured, and the pecoliar aitoation in whieh
her paat ezperienee, and eaeape from the power of the 8upe*
rior of the Hotel Diea Nnnneir, at Montreal, and the anai^
of the Roman Prieats in Canada, have left her.

My feelinga are freouently diatreaaed and agitated by the
recoueetion of what I haTO pasaed throngh, and by night and
day I have little peace of mind, and few perioda of calm and
pleasing recollection. Fntnrity also appeara meertain. I
know not what reception thia little work may meet with, and
what will be the effect of ita pnbiication here or in Oanada.
among atrangers, fHenda, or enemiea. I have given the world
the tmth, so far aa I haye gone, on anMecta of which I am told
they are generally ignorant; and I feel perfect eonfldenae^
that any fiusta which may vet be diaoovered, will confirm my
worda whenever they can be obtained. Whoever ahall explore
the Hotel Dien Nunnery at Montreal, will find mtqcestionf
able evidence that the descilptiona of Uie interior of ^b^^ edi-
fice, given in thia book, were ftoiished by one fiuBil&tft with
them; for whatever alterationa may be attempted, thei« are
changea which no maaon or carpenter can make and effee-
tnally conceal; and therefbre there must be plentiful evldeoea
in that Ihstitntion, of the tmth of my description.

There are living witnessea, alao, who ought to be made to

3 leak, withoQt fear of penancee, tortorea, and death, and pos-
bly thefar teatimony at aome fatnre tlmoi may be addeo, to
confirm my atatementa. There are witneesea I ahoald greatly
ngoice to iee at liberty; or rather there werv. Areth^lifing
nowt or will they bo permitted to live after the Frieata and
finperiota have teen thia book f Perhapa the wretched nima
in tha eella have already suffered fbr mv aake perhapa Jana
Bay has been aileneed for ever, or will ba mnrdered, befoia
•he haa time to add her moat hnportant teatiBMiiy to odKak

'.\H

Ti.

P&BFACn.

But tpttdj dtfttb hi ttlatloii only to tlili world, etn bt no
frMtodaml^tothoiowlioloodtMMIiofoBan. TImbmo
iMoUodon Off It tlwajt mokio mo nlitnblo. It woold dls-
tNii tho Nodtr, ■honld I fopoot tho dioanui with whioh I m
ofton tORlflod at nlgbt; tat I tomotlniei funaf myiolf pnr^
mod bj my wont onomMo: flroqntntly I Mom m If agaiii ibnt
vp In tho OonTont; ofton I Imoglno mytelf pmtnt ol tbo
Mpotttion of tho wont Monoo thot I bovo hfanod at or dti-
onbod. Sometlmot I itond by tho loorot plaoo of Intoimeut
In fho ooUar; lometlmoi I think I oan boor tho ibilokf of tho
bolploio femoloo In tbo bonds of atrodooo mon; and oome-
timoo olmoot loom oetnoUy to look ogain vpon tho oalm and
plaeid IJMtnrea of 8t Franeei, at abo appoarod whon 8ar>
roondod by her mnrderora.
I oannot banish tho sconos and eharaotor of this book from
jgH momory. To mo It oan noror appoar Uko an amnslng
'^nio, or loss Its Intorost and Importanoo. Tbo stonr li ono
whidi Is oontlnoally bofon mo, and most rotnm f^tu to my
mtakd, with palnlbl amotions, aa long aa I llvo. With time,
and Christian Instmotlon, and tho sympathT and oxaaiplet
^ of tho wise and good, I bono to learn snbmlsslTely to bear
whatoTor trials aro appointed mo, and to Improro nndor them
all.

Impressed aa I oontlnnally am with tho frigbtfbl reality of
tho palnftd eommonioations that I have made In thla volume,
I ean only offer to all penona who may doubt or dIoboUeve
my statements, these two things :

Permit mo to go throngb tho Hotel Blen Nnnneiy, al Mon>
treal, with some impartial ladioa and gontlomon, thatther may
eompare my aooonnt with the Interior parts of tho bnuding,
Into whioh no persons bat the Roman Biabop and Priests are
•veradmittod; andlffhoydonotflndmTdoseriptlontraothen
disesyrd me as an Impostor. Bring mo ooftnro a oonrt of jni*
tiee-*-theK I am willing to meet Xolsreire, Di^tnt, PAmm,
BMiin, and Rieharii. and their wioked eompanions, with tht
Btpeilor, and any of the nuns, bofon a thonssnd man.

HABIA MONK.

K^ York, Jmmutury 11, ISSC.

early Ut^]
— Kntranoo
OMy-Brlef
googregatlQ
Nonneiy— I
tlonsreeelTi

^7 parents
Msident in 1
marriage, wl
city I hare e
St. John'i, n
father waa an
•nd mj moth
«onnt ereiy s
Acoordinffl
tentivo to hlJ
passage from
in after life.
him; bntaftc
noeiyed anj
even brought i
tlthoagh nom
tentidii to her
well €l the
Jhnfiahee. Tc
home, and my
can traea my

■c^jilainno
Wnenabont

AWFUL DISOIiOSURES.

OHAPTER I.

. BAELT BVOOLLEOnOMI.

Bwly Iilf«— Religion Bdueatlon NtglMtad—llnl 8«lio«l
— Bntranot Into tli« ftohool of (ho OoafromtloBal Nmi^
neiy—Briof Aoooont of the NonnerlM In MoBtnol— Tht
CoDgregttional Nminoiy— Tho Black Nvnnoiy— Tbt Orof
Ntmnory— Pnblio Beopoet fat theM f nitltatloBO— Inolrao*
tloni NMlTod— TlM Gatoehliim— Tbo BIblo.

Mt pMrentB wm both from Seotland, but bad been
redaent in Lower Canada tome time before %|^^ ,.
marriage, whioh took plaee in Montreal, and in Wflf
citj I baye apent most of my life. I waa bom at
St. Jobn'a, where they liyed for a abort time. My
father waa an oiBeer nnder the Britiah Goremment,
and my mother baa enioyed a penaion on thai ae-
eouit OTexy ainoe bia death.

Aoeording to my earliest recoUeetlomi, be waa al-
tentiva to ma ftunily, and often repeated to na a
passage from the Bible, whieb often oeeiu«d to mo
m after life. I may probably baTO been taught by
him ; bnt after bia death I do hot reeolloot to ba^o
received any instmetion at home, and waa not
even brought np to read the Scriptnrea ; my mottier
althongh nominally a Protestant, did not pay ai-
tentiDa to her ehildren. She waa inelined to think
well of the Oatholiea, and often attended their
ehnrdbea. To my want of religiona inatroelfca al
home, and my ignorance of Qod and my dnty, I
can traoe my introdnetion to conTonta, and the
leenea I am now lo deaeribe.

When about aix or aeren years of age, I^ent la

.-wmg^mii^imf

8 MAMA MOMK.

■ehool to ft Mr. Worknuui, % Protestant, who tanffht
in Saorament street, and remained iOTeral months.
There I learnt to read and write, and arithmetio as
far as division. All the progress I e?er made in
those hranohes was in tiiat school, as I hare neyer
inproTed in m of them sinee.

A number of girls of mj aeqnaintanee went to
school to the nans of the Cfongregational Nunnery,
or Sisters of Chariij. The s<mods tanght by them
are perhaps morennmeroiis than my readers may
imagine. Nuns are sent out from the convent to
sumy of the towns and Tillages of Canada to teach
liiall schools ; and some of them as instructresses
in different psrts of the United States. When I was
ten years old, my mother asked me one day if I
shoold like to learn to read and write French, and
I began to think seriously of attending tha sdiool
in the Oongrecpitional Nunnery. I had already
some knowledge of that language, sufficient to speak
It • little, and my mother miew something of it.

I ha?e a distineft recollection of my entrance into
tte Nunn«ry ; the day was an important one in my
Ills, and en it commenced my acquaintance with a
«Mmnt. I wu conducted by some young friends
along NotN( Dame street, till we reached the gate.
Bnteifap we walked some distance along the side
of a budding towards a chapel, until we reached a
door, stoppM, and rung a belL II was opened,
«id entenng, we proceeded through a coTcred
passage till we took a ahorl turn to the left, and
leaehed tiie door of the school-room. On my en-
traaoe, the Superior met me, and told me ^t I
mwl dip my Ungers into the holy water at the
door, cross mysefi, and say a short prayer; and

MABU llt>19K.

Ihii iht Idld »• WM alwayi reqnirtd of Protoftant
•8 mU M Oatholie children.

Th«n won abont fifty girls in the lehool, and the
nnna profeaied to toaeh reading, writing, aritbm^tici
and geography. The methocb, howoTor, were Tory
impmeet, and little attention waa deroted to them,
the time being engrossed with lessons in needle-
wimAe* whieh waa performed with mnch skilL Tho
aims had no rery regular parts assigned them in tho
management of ue schools. They were rather un-
polished in their manners, often exclaiming, <* O'est
an menti,'' (that'a a lie,^ and ** mon Dien,*' (my
God,) on tho most teiTial oocasions. Their writing
I WIS poor, and fliey often put a capital letter in tho
nidcue of a word. The only book of geography
which we studied, waa a catechism ci geography,
from which wo learnt by heart a few questions and
lanswera. We were sometimea referred to a map,
|bat it waa only to point out Montreal or Quebec, or
WM other prominent name.
It may be necessary to mention, that there are
Omivents in Montreal, founded on diifereni
plans, and gOYemed 1^ different roles. Thefar
les are aa followa ; —

1. The Congregational Nunnery. 2. TheBlaek
fumeiy, or Convent of Sister Bourgeoise. . 8. Tho
' By Nunnery.

llie first of (hose professes to bo devoted entirely
» the edncation of ahrla. But with tho exception
fneedlo^work, haimy any thing ia tausht bntprayor
idcataeiiism; the instruotioii in reading, wlltmg,
., amo)Hptinf to Toy little and often to nothing,
lis OaJmsiiiM adjacent to the Osey Nunnonr iep-
itedliw|(lWonIybyawall. TheaoeondprqfuiSB

MiJUA MONK.

to bt a charitable liiatitation for the oare ol the siok,
and the supply of bread and medielnee to the poor ;
and ■omethmg is done in eharity, though bat littie
compared with thesiieof the buildings, and the nam<
ber of inmates.

The Grey Nnnnery, situated in a distant part of
the city, is » large edifice, containing departments
for the care of insane persons and foondlings. With
this I have less acquaintance than with the others.
I have often seen two of the Grey nuns, and know
their rules ; they do not confine them always within
their walls, like Uiose of the Black Nunnery. These
two Gonvents have their common names (Black and
Grey) from the colours ol the dresses worn by their
inmates.

' In these three Convents there are certain apart-
ments into which strangers can gain admittance, bat
others from which they are always excluded. InaU,
lar^ quantities of ornaments are made by the nuns,
which are exposed for sale in the Ornament Boonu^
and afford large pecuniary receipts every year, which
contribute much to their income. The nuns ofi
these Convents are devoted to the charitable object
apj^ropriated to each, the labour of making different
t^des known to be manufactured by tiiem, and
the religious observances, which occupy much of
their time. They are regarded with much respect
by the people at large; and when a novice takes I
the veil, she is supposed to retire from the tempt-
ations and troubles of this world into a state of holy]
seclusion, where, by prayer, self-mortification anil
good deeds, she j^repazes herself for heaven. SomC' j
times the Snpenor of a Convent obtains the eha^l
actor of working miracles: and when she diMj

lUKIA MOMK.

erowds Ourong the Convent, who think indnltteneee
ere to be dwiTed from bits of her elothee and other
thinffi ihe has possessed; and many have sent
artiefes to be tonehed by her bed or ohair, in which
yirtne is thought to remain. I osed to participate
in such ideas, and looked npon a nan as the hap-
piest of women, and a Convent as the most holy,
and delightful abode. Pains were taken to impress
snoh views npon me. Some of the prissts of tiie
Seminaiy oft^ visited the Congreptionsl Nnnnery ,
tnd catechised and talked on religion. The Super-
ior c^ the Black Nnnneiy also eame into the school,
and eidarged on the advantage we enjoyed in hav-
ing snch teachers, and dropped something now snd
then relating to her own convent, calculated to
make ns entertain the highest ideas of it, and
make us sometunes think of the possibility of get-
ting into it

Among die instructions given us by the priests,
•ome of the most pointed were directed against the
Protestant Bible. They often enlarged upon the
evil tendency of that book, and told us that but for
it many a soul condemned to hell, and su^Bring
eternal punishment might have been in happiness.
They could not say anything in its favour; fear
thit would be spealdng against religion and against
God. They wsmed us against its woe, &ud rep-
leiented it as a thing very dangerous to our souls.
In confirmation of tms, they would repeat some of
I the answers taught us at catechism ; a few of which
I will here give. We had litUe catechisms, (** Les
Petits Catediismes*') put into our hands to study;
bst the priests soon began to teach us a new set of
imwen,^ whioh were not to be found in our books

< A

lil

■*

1;^

MABIA MORK.

from fome of which I neeiTod new ideis, and got,
u I thought, important light on reUj^onsaabjects,
whioh eonfinned me more in my behef in the Bo-
man Catholic doctrinea* Thoae qneationa and an-
awera I can atill recall with tolerable accuracy, and
some of them I will add here. I noTcr have read
them aa we were tanght them only by word of month.

**QuetHon* PorqaoilebonDienn'apaafaittoni
leacommandemens?'* — "Eetporue. Faroe que 1*
homme n'eat paa ai toti qn'il pent garder tont sei
eommandemena.''

** Question. Why did not God make all the com-
mandments?*'— **^fUfoer. Becaoae man is not
atrong enough to keep them."

And another; ** Q. Porquoi lliomme ne lit pai
V Evangile ?" — ** 22. Parce que Peaprit de Thomme
est trop borne et trop f aible pour comprendre qu'est {
ce que Dieu a ecrit.*'

** Q, Why are men not to read the New Testa- 1
ment ?" — ** A. Because the mind of man ia too limi*
ted and weak to understand what God haa written."

These questions and answers are not to be found

in the conmion catechisms in use in Montreal and

. other places where I have been, but all the childreo

in the Congregational Nunnery were taught thein,|

and many more not found in Uiese books.

CHAPTER IL

OONCIBBOATIONAL NimKaBY.

8101]^ told bj ft F«Uow PapU againit a PriMt-Othal
StOflM— Pntiy Maiy— Oonnis to Father Riobardi-]lif|
nbaeqaont Oonfonioii— Initiuetions in the Gateohifla|

Thbbs waa a ghrl thirteen yean old whom
knew hi the School, who resided in the neighboi

MARIA MOHK.

hood of H7 mofhwy and witti whom I had boon
fUniliar. 8ho told mo ono daj at iohool, of tho
eondvei of a vrieai with hor aftoonfoiaion, at whidi
I waf aatoilahod. Itwaaofiooiiimnalaiidahamo-
fol a oaiiiMi I ooold hardly bolioTO it, and yet I
had 10 mnoh eonfidonoo that aho apoko tho troth,
that I ooold not diacfodit it

1^0 waa partly persnaded by tho piioat to bolioTO
ho eoold not ahi, boeaaso ho waa a pxioat, and that
any thing ho did to hor would aanetify hor ; and
I jet aha aoomed aomewhat donhtfol how aho ahonld
aet A nrieat, ahe had boon told by him, is aholy
man, and appointed to a holy oflKoo, and thoref oro
what wonld bo wiokod in other men, oonld not bo
go in bin. 8ho told mo aho had informed hor
mother of it, who expreasod no angor nor diaap-
piobation: bat only enjoined it npon her not to
ipeak of it; and remarked to her aa prieata were
not like men, bat holy and aent to mafroet and
[liTe ua, whateTor they did waa ri^t.

I afterwarda oonfeaaed to tho prieat that 1 had
Ihaazd tho atoiy and had a penanee to perform for
indnlging a ainfol ooiioaity in making inqnirieaii
ind £e girl had another for eonmianioatfaig it f
ifterwarda learned that other ohildren had liiii
treated in tho aame manner, andalaoof aimilar pro-
[ceedinga.

IndMd it waa not long before aneh langoage waa
lued to me, and I well remember how my ^wa of
light and wrong were ahaken by it Another giri
•t the aehool, nom a plaoo aboTo Montraid, oaUed
ttte Lae, told mo the following atory of whi^ had
loeeBifad reoently in that fieinity. A yoong aqaaw,
yied Iia Belle Marie, (pretty Maiy,) had been

'-^^^

MABIA MOMK.

■MB goiiig to eonfMiioii al the home of the wriest,
who lived ft little out of the Tillege. LeBeUeMarie
wai afterwaide miued, end her murdered bodj wm
found in the river* A knife wm also found bearing
the priMt'a name* Great indignation wm ezdtel
among the Indians, and the nnest immediately ab-
■oonded* and wm never heaia from. A note was
foond on hia table addresMd to him, telling him to
fly, if he wm goilty.

It WM aapposed that the priest wm fearful that his
eondnet might be betrayed by this young female i
and he ondertook to elear huHwlf by killing her.

TheM atoriea stniek me with aoiidse at first, but
I gradually beoan to f m1 diffnently, even supposing
them true, and to look upon the priests m men in-
eapable d afai ; beaidM. when I flrst went to con-
f easiMi, whieh I did to Father Bioharda in the old
Fkwneh ehuieh, sinM taken down, I heard nothing
improper; and it wm not untU I had been several
timM that the.priesta bMame more and more bold,
and were at length indeeent in their queationa, and
even in their eonduiA when I eonf eased to them in
the Saeristie. Thia aubjeet» I believe, ia not un-
dentood nor auapeeted among Protestanta ; and it
ia not ngr intention to apeak of it very particularly,
beeaoM it ia impoasible to do ao wimout Mying
tiiinga both ahameful and democaliaing.

I wOl only My here, that when quite a ehild, I
heard from the moutha of the priests at eonfeasion,
what I eannot repeat, with treatment eonrMpond-
ing; and aeveral femalM in Canada have aMured
me that they have repMtedly, and indaad regularly,
been lequiied to answer the same and other liki
fuMtloiia, many of whidi ptcipMnt to the mind deadi

'■f

MARU MONK.

whifih fh« nuMk iniqnitom and ooxrapt heart eoald
luurdly invent.

There was a freqaent ehange of teachers in the
Bchool of the Nonnery, and no regnlar qrstem was
pnnmed in onr inafanietion. There were muij
nuiB who came and went while I was there, being
[frequenfly called in and ont without any percepti-
reason. They anpply school teachers to many
|of Uie conntry towns, nsnally two to each of the
iwns with wldch I was acquainted, besides sending
listers of Charity to many parts of the TJniteS
Itates. Among those whom I saw most was Saint
atrick, an old woman for a nnn, that is about
lorty, Tciy ignorant and gross in her manners,
ith quite a beard on her fSse, and yeiy cross and
Me. She was sometimes onr teacher in
lewmgy and was appointed to keep order among ns.
e were allowed to enter only a few of the rooms
the Gongregational Nunnery, although it was
iOt considered one of the secluded Convents.
In the Black Nunnery, which is very near the
mgregational, is an hospital for sick people from
e city; and sometimes some of our boarders,
eb as were indisposed, were sent there to be
ued. I was once taken ill, and sent there for a
iw days.

There were beds enough for a number mora. A

attended it dauy, and a number of the

nuns of tliat Convent spend most of their

metlMUNi.

Thi^ wottld also sometimes read Inures and

pMjfiis to us.
After I had been in the Congregatiolial Nunnery
yearn, I left it, and attended several schools

MAMXJl mohol

ft ihorl timt. BailsoonbeeamediMttislUdthaT-
ing nuaxj ftrtre triali to andim «l horn*, whioh
m7 leeUnfli will not allow mo to doMiibo; and m
my Galhouo aoqnaintaneos had often apoken to me
In iwifoju of thttr fidth, I waa inoBned to belieTe
il although I knew little of any leligion. If I had
known anything of trae leHgion I Miere I ahonld
m&wK hiTO thought of becoming a nnn.

CHAPTER III.

BLACK MUmiBBT.

PMpantioiit to bteome a Nofie* in tho Black Nonnery-
Bntnae*— Ooeopatloiit of tho Nofiooi— 'The oportmonts to
whtah tbij had aeoooa— Fint Interriow with Jane Bay*
Bofomioo for tho Soporior— A wondorftil Nan— Uor Bell'
eoflo— Tho Holy Good Shophordt or Namoloaa Nun— Con*
ftiilonorNofiooo.

Ax length I detennined to beeome a Blaek Nnn,
and called npon one of the oldest prieata in thil
Seminary, to whom I made known my intention.

The old priest waa Father Bocqne. He la still I
alite. He waa at that time the oldeat priest in thi
Semlnaiy, and canned the Bon IMen, Good Ood,
as the SaeraniBntal wafer la called. When going
lo administer it^b any conntiy place, he used to
.ride with a man hefore him, who rang a bell as i
signaL When the Canadians heard it, whose hab*
itatioos he passed, they wooldmostrate themselvei
totheearth, worshippuigUasOod. Hewaaamu
of great age, and wore luge carls, so that he some'
what resembled his predecessor, Father Bone. Hi|
waa at thai time at the head of the Seminaiy.
This institntion is a large edifice, situated neartbdj

••"'•••.'•12S2£S'S

«A«Ult01IK.

M the ThiM Bi^«ri!riT*?"™*«7Mfcr down
hundred and lllSr^SS ^L*"'^ ^"w^t «m

|«giin in two w«S ?r^f3»^ my edUu

P» '••J* •» the ihoMe o?I wZfi."? "? •»»«• •

>!»»»•• dewSd ^i^* Tf*"*" «' «»»• hooie
Me S«p«ter ^^ ■"* 1«^ • %h wSS

Rffi; world'eSiinre ^**»^ *» S.

FpMi««eeiTOnS«S? "''••»««• lie
K where the norti^^"^'''**' "• latoahw.

Nation of gewfag.""^' •"* •"««««» in the

h"in^S£^«/t^«J-«.Vwer.,n ^

. s

MARIA MOMS.

dows: bnt in each group wiui one of the Teiled
nnni of Uie eonvent, wboM abode wm in tbe inte-
rior epartmente, to wbicb no noiiee was admitted.
Ab we entered, the Superior infoimed them that a
new noTiee had eome, and desired any present who
might haye known me in the world to signify it

Two Mils Fengnees, and a Miss Howard from
Vermont, who h^l been my feUow-pnpils in the
Congregational Nunnery, immediately reoognized
me. I was then placed in one of the groups at a
distance from them, uid furnished by a nun, ealled
Sainte Clotilde, with materials to make a puree,
sueh as priests use to carry the consecrated wafer
in, when they administer the sacrament to the sick. I
well remembermy feelings at that time, sitting among
a number of struigers, and expecting with pamf nl
anziiBty the arrival of the dinr tt .-hour. Then, ae I
knew» eeiemonies were to be performed, for which
I wai bnt ill prepared, as I had not yet heard the
rules by which I was to be governed, and knew
nothing of the forms to be repeated in tiie daily ex-
ereises,'«xcqpt the creed in Li^. This was during
the time of recreation, as it is called. The onlj
reereatioii there allowed, is that of the mind, and j
of this bat little. We were kept at work, acid pe^ i
mitted to speak with each other only in hearing of
the old nuns. We proceeded to diimer in couples, |
and ate in silence while a lecture was read.

The novices had access to only eight of the I
apartments ; and whatever else we wishra tp know,
we could only conjecture. The sleeping room wai
in the second story, at the end of the westen
wing* The beds were placed in rows, without 01I^
tains or anything else, to obstruct the view; and|

in 006 eonaer wmm a mw^^n

whwh WM the bed irfSr.S*?? l«««oiied oft ja

which rteeouMloS^S.^™*'^ *•*'••• ««»"«?

whieh ehowed e^rythfaff £ w j?*.*" <A«mber,
Aeh«l no light i7i^«^h«di«tii,ctl7; udee

JMw whether she wae ^^"^ "*?' "wJ* per-
ta«r that the tUiih^Ir^J^ "^V- As we

enother'. fealty „ ° i* ;«■ • mtae to betny one
Mtmyeelf niideirB«n«» .*• •*»*wi onr oil i

I Mm leuned the ^Si^^"^ ^ ""rtw^
' pw. wWeh went aanr^J^ Mwmonie. we hj to

Iwhidi had been began^«^ o» fine woMtedT
ITliii WM Bent as a BHi«e«rfi!«. S? ' *«» ttew.

lUmiA MONK.

ap a&d nokb to oi in • tone of liTelineM and klnd-
nesi, whioh seamed atxanga in a plaee where every
thing aroeared so eold andreserred. Some remarks
whidi she made were intended to cheer and en-
courage me, and made me think she felt some in-
terest in me. I do not recollect what she said, bnt
I remember it gave me pleasore. I also remember
that her manners struck me singularly. She was
rather old for a nun, nrobaUy thirty ; her iiffure
large, her face wrinkled, and her dress careless.
Sht seemed idso to be under less restraint than the
otiiiip, and this I afterwards found was the case.
Btei^imetimes even set the rules at defiance. She
i(i^mL speak aloud when silence was required, and
eiipftwes walk about when she ought to have kept
her plaee : she would even say and do things on
nurpoie to make us laugh, and, although often
Uamed lor her conduct, had her oflfences f^quenUy
passed over, when others would have been pimished
with penances.

I learnt that this woman had always been singa-
lar. She never would consent to take a saint's name
on receiving the veil, and had always been known
by her own, which was Jane Ray. Her irregular-
ities were found to be numerous, and penances were
of so little use in governing her, that she was pitied
l^ some, who thought her partially insane. She
was, commonly spoken of as mad Jane Bay ; and
when she committed a fault, it was often apologized
for by the Superior or other nuns, on the ground
that she did not know what she did.

The occupations of a novice in the Black Nun-
nery are not such as some may suppose. They trej
not employed in studying the higher branches of

education:
their m^dfl
not taught
much less a
knowledge,
in work and
year I stndj
work but ve

ersiuFienc
commit to m
tion of thedi
sdmitfted as a
Among the
ed in the Ooa

•'»«»yyoun
ed to me one
whioh I flnt ]
pnssion upon
The danght
J"^ passing tl
UV» on her ^
denly thrown (
•nd received a
M»d removed
>oon into the ]
termined to jd

bemg requirec
(which usually
•nd is abridgec
•ny exemplapv

«al» the veil iH
fo^ priest to b

»5«thisexpr
•ndahieiMly f^

MABU MOVK,

edneation: nor oflbred any adTantagaa lor ftoring
Ibeir minds, or polishing their mannors; Ihej an
not tanght tren reading, wiithig, or aiithmetie;
much less any of the more advanced branohea of
knowledge. My time was ehiefly employed, at first,
in work and prayers. It ia tme, dnrmg the last
year I stadied a oreat deal, and was required to
work bnt Tory little ; bat it wu the stady of vray-
ers in French and Latin, which I had merely to
commit to memory, to prepare for the eai^ repeti-
tion of them on my reception, and after I shoud he
sdmitted as a nnn.

Among the wonderf ol events which had happen-
ed in the Gonvent, that of the sadden conversion
of a gay yoong lady of the city into ft nan appear-
ed to me one of the most remarkable. The story
which I first heard while a novice, made a deep im-
piession npon my mind. It was nearly as follows :
The danghter of a wealthy citizen of Montreal
was passing the charoh of Bon Secoon one even-
ing, on her way to a ball, when ahe waa sad-
denly thrown down apon the steps or near the door,
ind received a severe shock. She was taken np,
and removed first, I think, into the charch, bol
soon into the Black Nannery, which ahe soon de-
tennined to Join as a nnn; instead, however, of
being required to pass through a long novitiate,
(which asaally occupies about two years and a half,
and is abridged only where the character is peculi-
arly exemplary and devout,) she was permitted to
tani the veil without delay, being declared by God
to a priest to be in a state of aanetity. The mean-
ing 01 this expression is, that she waa a real saint,
and already in a great measure raised above

^''

¥*'j

KABU M OHK.

world and its Inflneneeff and ineapaUt of ■famiBg ;
poiMMiiiff the power of intereesiioii, tad e proper
objeet to bo admsied in prayer. Thii lemarkaDle
iodiTidaal, I waa farther informed, waa atill in ttie
Convent, Uiongh I noTor waa allowed to aee her;
aho did not mingle wiih the other nnna, either at
work, worahip or meala; for ahe had no need of
food, and not only her aonl, bat her body, waa in
heaven a great piurt of her time, What added, if
poaaible, to the reyerenee and myaterioaa awe with
which I thoaght of her, waa the fact I learned,
that ahe had no name. The titlea need in apeaking
of her were, the holy aaint, reverend moUier, or
aaint bon paateor, (the holy good ahepherd.)

It ia wonderfal that we ooald have carried oar
reyerenee for the Superior ao far aa we did, althoagh
it waa the direct tendency of many instraotiona and
regnlationa, indeed of the whole aystem, to permit,
even to foater, a aaperatitioaa regurd for her. One
of oa waa oecaaionally oaUed into her r6om to out
her naila, or dreaa her hair ; and we woold often col-
lect the dippinga, and diatiibatoibem to each other,
or pi eaerv o them with the otmoat care. I once
picked np aU her atray haira I coold find after
combing ner head, boand them together, and kept
them nntil ahe told me I waa not worthy to poasess
thinga ao aaored. Jane M*Goy and I were once
sent to alter a dreaa for the Saperior. I gathered
np all the bita of thread, made a little bag, and pat
them ii^ it for aafe preaervation. Thia I wore a
long time ronnd my neck, ao long, that I wore cot
a nnmber of atringa, which I had replaced with new
onea. I bdieved it to possess the power of remov-
ing pain, and often prayed to it to core the tooth-

MABU MOmL n

•0b6, A«. Jan* Bay loiiittiiiiM pfofenad to outgo
Qg all In daTotion to tho Snpoior, and wovld piek
op the fetlhars altar maklaf h«r bad« Thaaa aho
would dlBtribnta among u, sajiog, **Whoii aha
dieii reliea will begin to grow aeareo, an^an had
better anpplj yoonelyaa in aeason." Tien aba
woald treat Uie whole matter in soma way to tnm
it into ridlonle. EqnallT eontradietofy , wai^d aha
appear, when oecaaionally abe woidd amdit Jaava
from her Superior to tell her dream. Witti n lariona
faee, whioh sometimes imposed npon alltof ns, and
made na half bdieye she waa in a perfeeiatalaof aaae-
tify, aba would naiiata In Frenon soma onaoaount-
able vision whiah she said she had enjoyed; then
tuning round, would say, *' There are aoma who
do not understand ma ; you all ought to bainfonn-
ed.*' And then she would say aomething totally
different in English, whioh put us to the greatest
agony lor fear of laughing, Somethnea aba would
say wa expaetad to m Superior herself one of those
days.

While I waa in the Congregational Nunnery, I
bad gone to the parish ohuroh, to confess, for al-
though the nuna had a private confession-room In
the building, the boardera were taken in partiea
through the streets, by some of the nuna, to con-
fess in the ehureh ; but in the Black Nunnery, aa
we had a chapd, and priests attending in tha con-
fessionala, we neyer left tha building,

Our confessions there as noTioes ware always
perfonned in one way. Thoae of us who ware to
eonfaia at a particular time, took our plaeea on our
knees near the confession-boz, and, after hayhig
repeated a number of prayers, &e., prescribed in our

MARIA MONK.

oook, eaine up jibe at a time and kneeled beside a
fine wooden ttttioe work, whieh entirely sepaiated
the eonfeeior from ne, yet permitted mi to place our
faces almost to his ear, and nearly eoneealed his
comitenance from onr view. I recollect how the
priests used to recline their heads on one side, and
often coyer their faces with their handkerchiefs,
while they heard me confess my sins, and put
questions to me, which were often of the most ui-
proper and reyolting natnre, naming crimes both
unttionght of and inhmnan. Still, strange as it
may seem, I was persaaded to believe that all this
was their dnty, or that it was done withoat sin.

Veiled nans wonld often appear in the chapel al
confession ; though, as I nnderstood, tbey ^ene^
ally confessed In private. Of the plan of ti^eir con-
fession-rooms I had no information; bat I sup*
posed the ceremony to be oondacted mach on the
same plan as in the chapel viz., with a lattice inte^
posed between the confessor and the confessins.

Punishments were sometimes resorted to while I
was a novice, thoagh bat seldom* The first time I
ever saw a gag, was one day when a yoong novice
had done something to offend the Sapexior. This
girl I always had compassion for, becaose she was
very yoong, and an orphan. The Superior sent for
a gag, and expressed her regret at bemg compelled,
by the bad conduct of the child, to proceed to such
a punishment; after which she put it into her
mouth, so far as to keep it open, and then let it re-
main some time before she took it out. There was
a leathern strap fastened to each end, and tackled
to the back part of the head.

MARIA MONK.

CHAPTER. IV.

iDltplMMd with the ^GonTent— Left It— Reeldenee tAt
Denis^Belios— Mutiage— Betorn to the Bleek Nunne^—
Objeotioni made by tome NoTieee.

After I had been a noyice foar or fiye years, from
le time I commenced school in the Convent, one
lay I was treated by one of the nuns in a manner
rbieh displeased me, and becaase I expressed some
ssentment, I was required to beg her pardon* Not
mg satisfied with this, although I complied with
le command, nor with the coldness with which the
Superior treated me, I determined to quit the Con-
rent at once, which I did without asking leave.

lere would have been no obstacle to my depar-

), novice as I then was, if I had asked permiss-

m ; but I was too much displeased to wait for

lat, and went home without speaking to any one.

I soon after visited the Town of St. Denis where

saw two young ladies with whom I had formerly
acquainted in Montreal, and one of them a
Dhool-mate at Mr. Workman's School. After some
DiiTersation with me, and leaminff that I had known
\ lady who kept a school in the ^ace, they advised
le to apply to her to be employed as her assistant
ler ; for she was then instructing the govem-
mi school in that place.

I fisited her, and found her willing, and I en-

jed at once as her assistant.

The government society paid her £20 a year :

^e was obliged to teach ten children gratuitously ;

jht liiive fifteen pence a month, for each ten

tolars more, and then she was at liberfy, accord-
: to the regulations, to demand as much as she

leMed for the other pupils. The course of

i
i

MARIA MONK.

instraetfon leqnired by the lodefy «iiilinoed onlj
rMding, ¥ncitmg, and what was called eiphering.
The booki used were a spelling book, V InstractioB i
de la JeiinesBe,the Catholie New Testament, and P
Histoire de Canada. When these had been read
through, in regular tneoession, the children wen
dismissed as having oompleted their edncation.
No difficulty is found in malong the common Frenobl
Canadians content with such an amount of instnu'l
tion as this ; on the contraiy, it is often found Yeiyf
hard indeed to prevail upon them to send tiiieir chilJ
dren at all, for tiiey say it taketf too much of thel
love of God from them to send them to schooll
The teacher strictly complied with the reqni8ii|
tion of the society, and the Roman Catholic oat»|
chism was regularly taught in the school, as mudl
from choice, as from submission to authority, u\
she was a strict Catholic. I had brought with nul
the little bag in which I had so long kept the cUn
pings of the thread left after making a dress for tJuj
Suj^or. Such was my regard for it, that I coo
tinned to wear it constantly round my neck, and I
feel the same reverence for it as before. I oce
sionally had the tooth-ache during my stay at
Denis, and then always relied on the influence
my little bag. On such occasions I would say-
** By the virtue of this bag may I be delivered f
the tooth-ache !" and I supposed that when it ci
it was owing to that cause.

While engaged in this manner I became acqt
ed with a man who soon proposed marriage ; an
young and ignorant of the world as I was, I he
his offers with favour, On consulting with
friend, she expressed a friendly interest for me,.

MARIA MONK.

isad me sgainst iakiiig saeh » step, and Mpedally
R I knew so litfle aliioat the mtn, except that 9 re-
port was eircnlated nnfayonrable to his ehaiaeter.
Jnfortiinately, I waa not wise enough to listen to
iet advice, and hastily married. In a few weeks I

occasion to repent of the step I had taken, as
le report proved tme which I thought justified,
ad indeed required, our separation. After I had
;eii in St Denis ahout three months, finding my*
}lf thus situated, and not knowing what else to do,
determined to return to the Convent, and pursue
ly former intention of becoming a Black Nun,
yM I gain admittance. Knowing the inquiries
16 Superior would make relative to me during my
sence, before leaving St. Denis I agreed with the
iy with whom I had been associated (when she
^ent to Montreal, which she did very frequency)
say to the Lady Superior I had been under her
)tection during my absence, which would stop

ler inquiry; as I was sensible,. should they
low I had been married I should not be admitted.
I soon returned to Montreal, and, on reaching
^6 dfy, I visited the Seminary, and in another in-

dew with the Superior conmmnicated my vrish,
id desired her to procure my re-admission aa a
»yice.

After leaving for a short time, she returned and
Id me that the Superior of the Convent had eon-
ited, and I was introduced to her. She blamed
le for leaving the nunnery, but told me Uiat I
ight to be ever grateful to my guardian angel for
' ' ig care of me, and bringing me in safety back.
jreqnested that I might be secured against the re-

shes and ridicule of all the novicas and nuns.

^ I

HARU M OMK.

which I thought some might oast upon me,
prohibited by the Superior; and this the proi
me. The money nBoally required for the adiL
eion of noTices had not been ezpeeted from me.
had been admitted the first time without any sue
requisition ; but now I choose to pay for my
admission. I Imew that she was able to dispei
with such a demand, and she knew that I was
In possession of any thing like the sum required.

But I was bent on paying to the Nunnery,
accustomed to receive the doctrine often repc
to me b^ore that time, that when the advantage!
the church was consulted, the steps taken we
Justifiable, tet them be what they would ; I the
fore resolved to obtain money on fdse pretene
confident that if all were known, I shomd be
from displeasing the Superior. I went to
brigade-major, and asked him to give me the moD
payable to my mother from her pension, wl
amounted to about thirty dollars, and witho
questioning my authority to receive it in her :
he gave it me.

From several of her friends I obtained
sums under the name of loans, so that altogether]
had soon raised a number of pounds, with which [
hastened to the Nunnery, and deposited a parti
the hands of the Superior. She received
money with evident satisfaction, though she ma
have known that I could not have obtained
honestly; and I was at once re-admitted ui
novice.

Much to my gratification, not a word fell
the lips of my M associates in relation to mj
eeremoidous departure, nor my voluntary rel

MABIA MONK.

he Superior's orden, I liad not ft doubt, had been
lioitiy laid down, and they certainly were care-
[y obeyed, for I never hem an alliudon made to
at subject daring my subsequent stay in the Con-
int, except that, when alone, the Superior would
metimes say a little about it.
There were numbers of young ladies who enter-
awhile as noyices, and became weary or disgnst-
with some things they observed, and remained
i a short time. One ef my cousins, who Hved at
aobine, named Reed, spent about a fortnight in
16 Convent with me. She however, conceived
leh an antipathy to the priests, that she used ex-
dons which offended the Superior.
The first day that she attended mass, whUe at
ler with us in full community, she said before
all, *' What a rascal that priest was, to preach

it his best friend t"
'All stared at such an unusual exclamation, and
l^me one enquired what she meant.
"I say*' she continued, ** he has been preaching
ist him who has given him his bread. Do you
ippose that if there were no devil, there would be
b; priests?'*

This bold young novice was immediately dismiss-
and in &e afternoon we had a long sermon
the Superior on the subject.
It happened that I one day got a leaf of an Eng-
i Bible which had been brought into the Convent,
kpped round some sewing silk, purchased at a
ore in the city. For some reason or other, I de-
frmined to commit to memory a chapter it contain-
1, which I soon did. It is the only chapter I ever
it in the Bible, and I can now rtpeat it It is

^**^

MABU MOMS

the Mcond of St. Matthew's gospel. **Now whflQ
JesuB WM bom at Bethlehem of Jndea," Sso, It hap.
pened that I was observed reading the paper, and
when the nature of it was discovered, I was condemn' I
ed to do nenance for my ofiTence.

6hreat dislike to the Bible was shown by those who
conversed with me about it, and several have re<
marked to me that if it were not for that book, Catho-
lies would never be led to renounce their own faitb,

I have heard passages read from the Evangile, n>
lating to the death of Christ; the conversion ol
Paul; a few chapters from St. Matthew, and pe^
haps a few others. The priests would also 8om6<
times take a verse or two, and preach from it. l|
have read St, Peter's life, bat only in the book call<
ed the ** Lives of the Saints.'' He, I understood,!
has the keys of heaven and hell, and has founded
onr church. As for Saint Paul, I remember, ss I
was taught to understand it, that he was once a great
persecutor of the Roman Catholieif until he becami
convicted, and confessed to one of the father e<»\
fetiorit I don*t know which. For who can exj
to be forgiven, who does not become a Catholic, andj
eoniessf

CHAPTER y.

lUotlvad Oonftrmatlon—Painflil Feelingi— Speoimtiii of Tb>|
ttraedons iMrtved on the 8iitt|eot.

Ths day on which I received Confirmation wasi
distressing one to me. I believed the doctrine d
the Roman Catholics, and according to them I wu
guflty of three mortal sins ; concealing something
aleonfesiion, sacrilege, in patting the body of Chiul|
in the itcrament under my feet, and by receivin

IIABIA MONK.

rhile not In * state of grace ! and now I had been
_ into all those sins in consequence of my mar-
[iage, which I never had acknowledged, as it wonld
isve cat me o£f from being admitted as a nnn.
On the day when I went to the church to be con-
led with a number of others, I suffered extremely
rom the reproaches of my conscience. I believed,
I had been told, that a person who had been
lointed with the holy oil of confirmation on the
»rehead, and dying in the state in which I was,
roold go down to hell, and, in the place where the
had been mbbed, the names of my sins would
Ee out of my forehead ; these would be a sign by
fhich the devUs would know me, and would torment
he the worse for them. I was thinking of all this,
fhile I was sitting in the pew, waiting to receive
le dL I felt however some consolation, when my
came to my mind: which I derived from ano-
iet docft^lie of the church, viz., that a bishop
vuld absolve me from all sins any minute before
ij death; and I intended to confess them all
More leaving the world. At length the moment
^r administering the ** sacrament" arrived, and a
was rung. Those who had come to be con-
led had brought tickets from their confessors,
Ihioh were thrown into a hat, and carried around
a priest, who in turn handed each to a bishop,
which he learned our names and applied a UtUe
[the oil to the foreheads. This wasimmediately rub-
off by a priest with a bit of cloth quite roughly.
1 1 went home with some qualms of conscience, and
ithought with dread of the following tale, which
vft heard told, to illustrate the sinfiUuess of con-
iiot like mine.

1^1 '

MARIA MONE.

A pritst WM once traveling, when he was pan.
Ing by a honse, hit hone fell on its knees, and
would not rise. His rider dismounted and went is
to leam the cause of so extraordinary an occurrence, j
He found there a woman near death, to whom ij
priest was trying to administer the sacrament, but
without success ; for every time she attempted to
swallow it, it was thrown back out of her moulh in*
to the chalice. He perceiyed it was owing to uncon*
fessed sin, and took away the holy wafer from heiij
on which his horse rose from its knees, and he piu>|
sued his journey.

I also had been told, that we shall have as manjl
devils biting us, if we go to hell, as we have uncon^f
fessed sins on our consciences.

I was required to devote myself for a year to thil
study of theprayers and practice the ceremomefl
necessary on the reception of a nun. This I fonnil
a vexy tedious duty ; but as I was released from thil
daily labours usually demanded of novicei, I felt littiij
disposition to eomplain.

CHAPTER VL

Taking Ui« Yeil^Intervitw afterwardt with the Superior— Si»|
priM Mid horror at th« DiielorareB— Besolntion to lubmill

I WAS introduced into the Superior's room on tbil
evening preceding the day on which I was to takil
the veu, to have an interriew with the bishop. Thil
Superior was present, and the interview lasted haUl
an hour. The bishop on this as on other occasionil
^pearedtobe habitually rough in his mauii6n|
His address was by no means prepossessing.

Before I took tiie veil, I was ornamented for tlii|
eeremony, and was clothed in a dress belonging

MABU MUNK.

le Convent, whieh was used on snoh occasions ;

id placed near the altar in the chapel, in the yiew

> a nnmher of spectators, who had assembled.

faking the veU is an affiiir which occnrs so fire-

aentiiy in Montreal, that it has long ceased to be

sgarded as a novelty ; and, although notice had

sen given in the French parish church as nsnal,

ily a small audience assembled.

Being well prepared with a long training, and

Ireqnent rehearsals, I stood waiting in my large

owing dress for the appearance of the bishop.

[e soon presented himself, entering by a door

Bhind the altar : I then threw myself at his feet,

id asked him to confer upon me the veiL He

[pressed his consent; and then turning to the

iperior, I tiirew myself prostrate at her feet,

oovdiDg to my instructions, repeating what I

ive before done at rehearsals, and made a move*

lent as if to kiss her feet. This she prevented,

appeared to prevent, catching me by a sudden
[otion of her hand, and granted my request I
)en kneeled before the Holy Sacrament, that is a

jre round wafer held by the Bishop between his

fore finger and thumb, and made my vows.
[This wafer I had been taught to regard with the

lost veneration as the real body of Jesus Christ,
le presence of which made the vows uttered before
Ibinding in the most solemn manner.
[After taking the vows, I proceeded to a small
lent behind the altar, accompanied by four

18, where there was a coffin prepared with my

1*8 name engraved upon it:

** Saint Eustaob.''

IMy companions lifted it by four handles attached

MABIA MOHK.

to it, while 1 threw off my dress, and pnt on that of
a nnn of Soenr Bonrgeoise ; and ttien we all returned
to the ehapel. I proceeded first, and was followed
by four nnns, the Bishop naming a number of world-
hr pleasures in rapid suocession, in reply to which
I as rapidly repeated, ** Je renounce, je renounce,
je renounce,"— I renounce, I renounce, I renounce.
i^ The cofSn was then placed in front of the altar |

V' and I advanced to place myself in it. This coffin j
was to be deposited, after the oeremony, in an oat* I
house, to be preserved until my death, when it wai
to receive my corpse. There were reflections whicb |
I naturally made at that time, but I stepped in, ex*
tended myself, and lay still. A pillow had been

S laced at the head of the coffin, to support my head!
I a comfortable position. A Uiick black cloth wai
then spread over me, and the chanting of Latio
hymns commenced. My thoughts were not m
most pleasing during the time I lay in that situation,
The pall, or Drap Mortel, as the <uoth is called, had
a strong smell of incense, which was always disa-
greeable to me, and then proved almost suffocating,
I recollected the story of the novice, who, in ta^dng
the veil, lay down in her coffin like me, and wail
covered in the same manner, but on the removal oi|
the covering was found dead.

When I was uncovered, I rose, stepped out of myl
coffin, and kneeled. Other ceremonies then follow'f
ed, of no interest ; after which the music commeD^|
ed, and here the whole was finished. I then m
turned to the Superior's room, followed by thi|
other nuns, who walked two by two, with the
hands folded on their breasts, and their eyes
down upon the floor. The nun who was to be m^

ex-

kollof'
WenO'

ky tiill

BCABU MOIIX.

eompanion in fatnra, then walked al tha and of iha
prooesBion. On reaching tha Saperior'a door they
all left me, and I entered alone, and fonnd her
with the Bishop and two Priesta.

The Saperior now informed me, that haying taken
the black yeil, it only remained that I ahonld awear
the three oatha cnstomary on becoming a nnn : and
that some explanation wonld be necessary from her.
I was now to have access to every part of the edi*
fice, even to the cellar, where two of the sisters were
imprisoned for caasea which she did not mention,
i mast be informed that one of my great dntiea waa
|(o obey the priests in all things; and this I soon
ieamt, to my aatonishment and horror, waa to live
the practice of criminal intercourse with them,
expressed some of the feelings which this annonnca-
ent excited in me, which came upon me like a flash
I lightning; but the only effect waa to set her ar-
ing with me, in favour of the crime, repreaenting
as a virtue acceptable to God, and honourable to
e. The priests, she said, were not aituated like
ither men, being forbidden to marry ; while they
Ted secluded, laborious, and self denying lives for
lor salvation. They might, indeed, be considered
saviours, as without their aervice we could not
tarn pardon of sin, and must go to hell. Now it
our solemn duty, on withdrawing from the
orld to consecrate our lives to religion, to practice
ery species of aelf-denial. We could not be too
ble, nor mortify our feelings too far ; thia waa
be done by oppoaing them, and acting contrary
them; and what ahe proposed waa, therefore,
in the eight of God. I now felt how fool-
I had been to place myself in their power.

•

MAKIA MOIIX.

From what the 8«id, I ooold draw no other eon-
olnsioiis bnt that I was required to act like the most
abandoned of beings, and that my fatnre assoeiatei
were habitually guilty of the most heinous and de-
testable crimes. When I repeated my expressioni
of surprise and horror, she told me that suoh feel-
ings were yery common at first, and that manj
other nuns had expressed themseWes as I did, who
had long since changed their minds. She eyen
said, on her entrance into the nunnery, she had
felt like me.

Doubts, she declared, were among our greatest
enemies. They would lead us to question everj
point of duty, and induce us to waver at eyery step.
They arose only from remaining imperfection, and
were always eyidences of sin. Our only way was to
dismiss them immediately, repent and confess them.
They were deadly sins, and would condemn us to
hell, if we should die without confessing them.
Priests, she insisted, could not sin. It was a thing {
impossible. Eyexy thing that they did, and wish*
ed was right. She hoped I would see the reason*
ableness and duty of the oaths I was then to take,]
and be faithful to them.

She gaye me other information, which excited]
feelings in me, scarcely less dreadful. Infanti|
were sometimes bom in ttie Conyent, but they weni
always baptised, and immediately strangled 1 Thiil
secured their eyerlasting happiness ; for the 1:
tism purifies them from all sinfulness, and beinjl
sent out of the world before they had time to do snj[
thing wrong, they were at once admitted into hei-l
▼en. How happy she exclaimed, are those whtj
■ecure immortal happiness to suoh little beiogil

MABIA MONK.

Their littt« souls would thank those who kill their
bodies, iif fliey had it in their power.

Into what a place, and among what society, had
I beoi admitted I How different did a Conyent now
appear from what I snpposed it to be I The holy
women I bad always fancied the nnns to be, the
venerable Lady Superior, what were they ? And
the priests of the Seminary adjoining (some of
whom, indeed, I had reason to think were base and
profligate men,) what were they allf I now learn-
ed that they were often admitted into the nnnnery,
and idlowed to indalge in the greatest crimes,
which they call Tirtnes.

After haying listened to the Superior alone^ •
number of the nuns were admitted, and took a free
part in the conversation. They concurred in eyeiy
thing which she told me, and repeated, without any
shame or compunction, things which criminated
themselyes. I must acknowledge the truth, that
all this had an effect u^uii :iay mind. I questioned
whether I might not be in the wrong, and felt as
if their reasoning might haye some just foundation.
I had been seyeral years under the tuition of
Catholics, and was ignorant of the Scriptures, and
snaocustomed to the society, example, and conyer-
lation of Protestants ; had not heard any appeal to
the Bible as authority, but had been taught, both
by precept and example, to receiye as trutii eyery*
thing said by the pnests. I had not heard thdr
tathority questioned, nor any thing said of any
other stancUurd of faith. I had long been familiar
with the corrupt and licentious expressions used
at confessions, and belieyed that other women were
also. I had no standard of duty to refer to, and

IIABIA MOMK.

no jadgment of mj own which I knew how (o nse.

All around me inEdsted ihat my doubts proved
oidy my own ignorance and sinf alness ; that they
knew by experience that they would soon give
place to tme knowledge, and an advance in religion ;
and I felt something like indecision.

Still there was so much that disgusted me in the
debased characters around me, that I would most
gladly have escaped from the nunnery, and never
returned. But tiiat was a thing not to be thought
of. I was in their power, and this I deeply felt,
while I thought that there was not one among the
whole number of nuns to whom I could look for
kindness. There was one, however, who began to
speak to me in a tone that gained my confidence,—
the nun whom I have mentioned as distinguished
by her oddity, Jane Bay, who made us so mUch
amusement when I was a novice. Although there
was nothing in her face, form, or manners, to give
me any pleasure, she addressed me with apparent
friend&ness ; and while she seemed to concur with
some things spoken by them, took an opportunity to
whisper a few words in my ear, unheard by then,
intimating that I had better comply with every thing
the Superior desired, if I would save my Itfe. I
was somewhat alarmed before, but I now became
much more so, and determined to make no further
resistance. The Superior then made me repeat the
three oaths ; and, when I had sworn them, I was
shown into the communify-roomsy and remained
gome time with the nuns, who were. released from
their employments, and enjoyed a recreation day,
on account of the ailmission of a new sister. My
feelings duhng the remainder of the day I shall not

IIABIA MONK*

desoiibe, but pass on to Iho eeremonies Chat took
place at dinner.

At eleven o'clock the bell rang for dinner, and
the ntms all took their places in a doable row, in
the same order as they left the chapel in the mom-
mgt except tiiat my companion and myself were
stationed at tiie head of the line. Standing thus
for a moment, with our hands placed one on the
other over the breast, and hidden in our large cn£Gi,
with our heads bent forward, and eyes fixed on the
floor; an old nnn, who stood at the door, clapped
her hands as a signal for ns to proceed ; and the
procession moved on, while we all commenced the
repetition of litanies. We walked on in thia order,
repeating all the way nntil we reached the dining-
room, where we were divided into two lines; those
on the right passing down one side of the long table,
and those on the IdEt the other ; and each topped
in her place* The plates were all arranged, each
with a knife, fork, and spoon, rolled np in a napkin,
end tied ronnd with a Imen band marked with the
owner's name. My own were prepared like the
rest; and on the band aronnd ttiem I fonnd my
new name written—** Saint Enstace."

There we stood till all had concluded the litany,
when the old nnn who had taken her place at the
head of the table, said the prayer before meat, be-
ginning, ** Benedicite," ana we sat down. I do not
remember of what oar dinner consisted, bat we
nsnally had soap, and some plain dish of meat;
the remains of which were served np al sapper as
fricasee. One of the nans, who had been appoint-
ed to read that day, rose, and began a leotare from
•book pat into her hands by th« Superior, whll«

MARIA MONK*

the rest of ns ate in perfect silence* The nun who
reads daring dinner, stays afterwards to dine. Ai
last as we miished onr meals, each rolled np her
knife, fork, and spoon, in her napkin, and hound
them together with the band, and sat with haadi
folded. The old nnn then said a short prayer,
arose, stepped a little aside, dapped her hands, and
we marched towards the door, bowing as we passed
before a little chapel, or glass box, containing a |
wax image of the infant Jesns.

Nothing important occurred till late in the afte^
noon, when, as I was sitting in the commnni^<
foom, Father Dnfresne called me out, saying, be I
wished to speak with me. I feared what was his
intention ; bat I dared not disobey. In a pxivate
apartment, he treated me in a bmtal manner ; and,
from two other priests, I afterwards received similar
usage that evening. Father Dnfresne af terwudi
appeared again ; and I was compelled to remain ii |
company with him nntil morning.

I am assured that the conduct of priests in our I
Convent had never been exposed, and it is not imi-
ffined by the people of the United States. Tim
mduces me to say what I do, notwithstanding the
strong reasons I have to let it remain unknown. Still I
I eannot force myself to speak on such aubjeoti
•xeept in the most brief manner.

CHAPTER VII.

DaOy C«nmoniM<- Jane Bay among the Num.

On Thursday morning, the bell rang at half-pul
(dx to waken us. The old nun who was acting ii
night-watch immediately spoka aloud;

MARIA MONR.

•< Voiei le Seignienr qui yieut." (Behold ih«
jord eometii.) The nanB all nsponded :
(• Allons-y peyant ltd." (Let ns go and meet him.)
We rose immediately, and dressed qnieldy, step-
ling into the passage-way, at the foot of onr bed, as
loon as were ready, and taking place each beside
ler opposite companion. Thus we were drawn np
n a doable row we length of the room, with our
lands folded across our breast, and concealed in
le broad eufb of oar sleeyes. Not a word was
ittered. When the signal was giyen, we all pro-
ceeded to the commonity-room, and took oar places
rows fkoing the entrance, near which the Supe-
liorwas seated in a yergiere. We fimt repeated
An nom da Pere, da F3s, et da Saint Esprit —
d soit iL" (In the name of the Father, the Son»
id the Holy Ghost, — ^Amen.) We then kneeled
id kissed the floor ; then, still kneeling, on oar
lees, we said a long prayer ** Diyin Jesas, saayear
^e mon ame," (Diyine Jesas, Sayioar of my seal.)
^hen the Lord's prayer, three Hail Marys, foar
), and fiye confessions, (oonfesse a Diea.) the
Bn commandments ; the acts of faith, and a prayer
the Virgin, in Latin, which I neyer nnderstood
I word of. Next we said litanies of the Holy Name
Jesas, in Latin, which were afterwards to be
Bpeated seyeral times in the day. Then came the
nyer for the beginning of the day ; then beudiag
9wa, we commenced the Orison Mental, (or Mental

m,) whioh lasted aboat an hoar and a half*

This exercise was considered yery solemn. We

[en told in the nnnnery that a eertain saint was

I^Ted by the use of it, as she neyer omitted it. It

of seyeral parts: First, the Saperior read

i i

KABIA MONK.

to VB ft chapter from ft book, whieh oeenjiied t^
minutes. Then profomid dlenoe ptevuled foi
fifteen minntes, daring which we were meditating
npon it Then she read another chapter of equal
length on a dififerent subject, and we meditated npoD
that another quarter of an hour; and after a third
readmg and meditation, we fiidshed the exercise
with a prayer of contrition, in which we asked fo^
giyeness for the sins committed during the Orisoa
During this hour and a half I became vezy weaiy,
having before been kneeling for some tmie, anjj
haring then to sit in another position more uncom*]
fortable, with my feet under me, and my handi
dacqped, and my body bent humbly forward, witk
my head bowed down.

When the Orison was oyer, we all rose to the d
right kneeling; posture, and repeated several prayer
and the litanies of the providences, ** providence
Dieu," d», then followed ft number of Latin prij
ers, which we repeated in the way to mass, for 1
the nunnery we had mass daily.

When mass was over, we proceeded in our nsi
order to breakfast, practising the same forms wl
I have described at dinner. Having made
meal in silence, we repeated the litanies of the ** hi
name of Jesus,'* as we proceeded to the comm
room ; and such as had not finished them on
arrivid, threw themselves upon their knees
they had gone through with them and then
the fioor, rose again. At nine o'clock comn)i
the lecture which was read by a nun appointed
perform that duty that day : all the rest of us in
room being engaged in work.

The nmis were distributed in different

lied

MABIA HOmC

Inni^ foomii at different kincUi of work, and each
listening to a leotnxe. This eontinned until
o*elook, when the recreation-bell rang. We
__ eontinaed our work, but the nuns oonyersed
snbjeots permitted by the roles, in the hearing
the old nuns, one of whom was seated in each
the groups. At half-past ten the silence bell
ig, and this oonyersation instantly ceased, and
) recitation of some Latin prayers continued half
hour.

[At eleven o'clock the dinner-bell rang, and we
)nt through the forms of the preceding day. We
needed two by two. The old nun clapped her
ids as the first couple reached the door, when we
bpped. The first two dipped their fingers into
B font, touched with the holy water the breast,
[ehead, and each side, thus forming a cross, said
, the name of the Father, Son^ and Holy Ghost,
len, and then walked to the dining-room repeat-
[ the litanies. The rest did the same. On reach-
the door the couples divided, and the two rows
fnims marching up, stopped, and faced the table
ist their plates. There we repeated the close
the litany aloud. The old nun pronounced
BnecUcte," and we sat down. One of us read
), during the whole meal : she stays to eat
the rest have retired. When we had dined,
of us folded up her napkin, and again folded
hands. The old nun then repeated a short
jer in French, and stepping from the head of
itdbile, let us pass out as we came in. Each of
' }wed in passing the little chapel near the door,
eh is a glass-case, containing a waxen figure of
I infant Jesna. When we reached the oommuni-

ill

MARIA MONK.

tj-room we took oar placet in rows, end
npon the floor, while a nnn read alond. ** Dolemj
de notre Sainte Marie,*' (the sorrows of onr htj
Mary.) At the end of each verse we respond
** Ave Maria." We then repeated the litany of i
providences and the ** Benissante."

Then we kissed the floor, and, rising, took
work, to converse on permitted snhjects — calledij
cr^atton— till one o'clock. We then repeated I
anies, one at a time in succession, still sewing, !
anhonr.

At two o'clock commenced the afternoon lect
which lasted till near three. At that hour ontl
the nnns stood np in the middle of the room,
asked each of as a question out of the catecl
and such as did not answer correctly had to
until that exercise was concluded, upon as
dry peas as there were verses in the chapter <
which they were questioned. I have somet
kneeled on peas until I suffered great inconvei
and pain. It soon makes one feel as if ne
were running through the skin. At four o'd
recreation commenced, when we were alloweil
speak to each other while at work. At hall-)
four we began to repeat prayers in Latin, whi]e|
worked till flve o'clock, when we repeated the "j
ers for the examination of conscience," the "[
after confession," the prayer before saciama
and the '* prayer after sacrament." At dark||
laid our work aside, and went over the same pn
which we had repeated in tiie morning ezee^
the orison mental : instead of that long exc
examined our consciences, to determine whel
had performed the resolution we had made IbI

MARIA MOMS.

_ jg, and mieh as had repeated an '* aete de
)/' or expresflion of gratitude ; siieh as had not,
an ** acte de eontrition."

ten the prayers were eonclnded, any nnn who
been disobedient in the day, knelt and asked
ion of the Superior and her companions *< for
I scandal she had caused them,'* and then request-
fa penance to perform. When all the penances
been imposed, we all proceeded to the eating-

[ to supper, repeating utanies on the way. The

Bmonies were the same as at dinner, except that

[lecture was read. We ate in silence, and went

bowing to the chapelle, and repeating litanies.

ling to the community-room, we had more
[yers to repeat, which are called La eovronne,
)wn,) which consists of the following parts :—
Four Paters. 2nd. Four Ave Marias. Srd.

Gloria patris. 4th. Benissez Santeys. At

dose we kissed the floor; then had recreation

ihfJf-past eight o'clock, conversing on permitted

jects, but closely watched, and not allowed to

lin tiie comers.

Lt half -past eight a bell was rung, and a chapter
read to us, in a book of meditations, to employ
minds upon during our waking hours at night.
iding near the door, we dipped our fingers in
holy water, crossed and blessed ourselves and
Deeded to the sleeping room two by two. When
[hid got into bed, we repeated a prayer begin-

witti,—

<*Mon Dien, je vous donne mon cceur/'— •

"My God I ^ve you my heart;"

Ifhen an old nun, bringing some holy water,

led it on our beds to drive away the devil,

■ !n

MABIA MOIIK.

wlifle we eroBsed onrselyei with it again. At nim]
o'oloek the bell rang, and all awake repeated a prayer, I
ealled tiie offirande ; those who were asleep wen|
eonsidered as excnsed.

After my admission among the nuns, I had nonl
opportoni^ to observe the conduct of mad Jaiu|
Bay. She behaved quite differently from the re
and with a degree of levity irrecon^eable withtlit|
roles. She was a large woman, with nothing beiit
tiful or attractive in her face, form, or mannen;|
careless in her dress, and of a restless dispositioii,!
which prevented her from applying herself to an;.!
thing for any length of time, and kept her roTio||
about, and idways talking to somebody or other. ~
was dressed in ttie plain garments of tihe nuns, bonnil
by the same vows, and accustomed to the samelifi||
resembling them in nothing else, and frequentlyiihl
terrupting all their employments. She was appvl
ently always studying, or pursuing some odd f anojl
now rising from sewing to walk up and down, i
straying in another apartment looking about, ti\
dressing some of ns, passing out again, or sajiii
somethuig to make us laugh. But what showed Bbjl
was no novelfy, was the little attention paid tohei;!
and the levity with which she was treated by
whole nuns ; even the Superior every day passeij
over irregularities which she would have punidie
with penances, in any other. I soon perceived fhil|
she betrayed two distinct traits of character ; a I
disposition towards such as she chose to prefer, iiii|
a pleasure in teasing those she disliked, or sochi
had offended her.

IIABU MONK.

CHAPTER VIII.

Bsoriptlon of Apartments in the Bltek Nunnery, in order:
lit Floor— 8nd Floor— Oerret— The Founder— Superior's
ifanagement with the Friends of Novioes— Beligious lies—
Criminality of Oonoealing Sins at Confession.

1 1 WILL now give from memoxy a general deserip-
)n of the interior of the Convent of Black Nans,
Bept the few apartments which I never saw. I
ly be inaccnrate in some things, as the apart-
mts and passages of that spacious building are
lerous and various ; but I am willing to risk my
Bdit for troth and sincerity on the general corres-
idence between my description and things as
By are. And this would, perhaps, be as good a
le an any by which to test the truth of my state-
fnts, were it possible to obtain access to the in-
ior. It is well known, that none but veiled nuns,
bishop and priests, are ever admitted ; and, of
IB that I cannot have seen what I profess to
ribe, if I have not been a black nun. The
Bsts who read this book will acknowledge to
iselves the truth of my description ; but will, of
96, deny it to the world, and probably exert
iselves to destroy my credit. I offer to every
ler the following description, knowing tiiat time
possibly throw open those secret recesses, and
m the entrance of those who can satisfy
Ives, of its truth. Some of my declarations
be thought deficient in evidence, which must
Necessity be in the present state of things. But
I is a Idnd of evidence on which I rely, as I see
unquestionable and satisfactory it must provoi
met it shall be obtained.
I the interior of the Black Nunnery, whenever

■i

'.;■

MABIA M OMK.

it shall be examined, is materially different from the
following description, then I shall elaim no oonfi.
denoe of my readers. If it resemble it, they will,
I presume, place confidence in some of those deelaiii
tions, on which I may never be c^orroborated by trot
and living witnesses.

I am sensible that great changes may be madi
in the fomitore of apartments ; &at new walls mij
be constracted, or old ones removed ; and I han
been informed, that masons have been employtj
in the Nunnery since I left it I well know, tiulj
entire changes cannot be made, and that enoi
must remain to substantiate my description, whei]
ever the truth shall be known.

The Fint Story.

%': Beginning at the extremity of the western nm
of the Convent, towards Notre Dame street, ontiii|
first story, there is-*

1. The Nuns* private ehapel, adjoining whid
is a passage to &. small projection of the build
extending from the upper story to the ground,
small windows. Into tiie passage we were reqiiu
to bring wood from the yard, and pile it for use.

2. A large community-room, with plain bene
fixed against the wall to sity and lower ones in
to place our feet upon. There is a fountain in i
passage near the chinmey at the further end,
washing the hands and ^e, with a green oi
sliding on a rod before it. This passage leadsl
the old nuns* sleeping-room on the right, and '
Superior's sleeping-room beyond it, as well astoj
stair-case which conducts to ttie nuns* sleeping-'^

MARIA MONK.

ibove. At the end of the passage is a door open-
iginto—

8. The dining-room; this is larger than the
^ommonitj-room, and has three long tables for eat-
bg, and a collection of little pictures, a crucifix,
pad an image of the infant Saviour in a glass case.
rhis apartment has four doors, by the first of which
je are supposed to have entered, while one opens
D a pantry, and the third and fourth to the two
^ext apartments.

4. A large community-room, with tables for sew-
ig, and a stair-case on the opposite left-hand corner.

5. A community-room, for prayer used by both
[tms and novices. In the farther right-hand corner

a smidl room, partitioned off, called the room for
le examination of conscience, which I had visited
^hile a novice by permission of the Superior, and
[here nuns and novices occasionally resorted to
pfleot cu their character, usually in preparation for
^e sacrament, or when they had transgressed some
the rules. This little room was hardly large
longh to contain half a dozen persons at a time.

6. Next, beyond, is a large community-room
|r Sundays. A door leads to Sie yard, and thence

a gate in the wall on the cross street.
i7. Adjoining this is a sitting room, fronting on
[e cross street, with two windows, and a store room

tiie side opposite them. There is but little fur-
Itnie, and that very plain.

18. From this room a door leads into what I call

wax-room, as it contains many figures in wax,

|t intended for sale. There we sometimes used

Ipray, or meditate on the Saviour's passion. This

Dm projects from the main building ; leaving it,

i^l

MABIA MONK.

yoa enter a long passage, with cnpboards on tht
right, in which are stored erookery-ware, kuivei
and forks, and other articles of table fomitare, to
replace those worn ont or broken ^all of the plaiuest
description ; also, shovels, tongs, &c. This passage
leads to—

9. A comer room, with a few benches, &c., and
» door leading to a gate in the street. Here some
of the medicines were kept, and persons were oftes
admitted on business, or to obtam medicines witli
HcketB from the.priests ; and waited till the Superior
or an old nun oould be sent for. Beyond this roon
we never were allowed to go ; and I cannot speik
from personal knowledge of what came next.

The Second Story.

Beginning, as before, at the western extremity ot
Ihe north wing, but on the second story, the farthest
apartment in lliat direction which I ever entenj
was,—

1. The nnns* sleepin^r-room, which Ihavedei'l
eribed. Here is an acces.^ to the projection mes-i
tioned in speaking of the first story. The staini
by which we came np to bed are at tiie farther enl
of the room ; and near them a crucifix and font d\
holy water. A door at the end of the rooms open
into a passage, with two small rooms, and clo8eii|
between them, containing bed-clothes. Next yotj
inter,— ^

2. A small community-room, beyond which ii
a passage with a nairow staircase, seldom u
wmeh leads into the fonrtti community-room,
Che fonrth stoxy. Following the passage j
mentioned, yon enter by a doori—

IIABIA MOWK.

8. A litUe sittmg-room f urniflbed in the follow-
i inf, manner: —with chain, a lofa on the north aide
ee?ered with a red-fignred coyer and fringe ; a ta-
ble in the middle, commonly bearing one or two
books, an inkstand, pen, Sbo. At one comer is a
litUe projection into the room, caused by a stair-
lease leading from above to the floor below, without
lany communication with the second story. This
)om has a door opening upon a staircase leading
the yard, on the opposite side is a gate opening
ito the cross street. By this way the physician
admitted, except when he comes later than
inal. When he comes in, he sits a little while,
itil a nun goes into the adjoining nuns' sick-
9m, to see if all is ready, and returns to admit
^im. After prescribing for the patients, he goes
farther, but returns by the way he enters ; and
ese are ilie only rooms into which he is admitted.
4. The nuns' sick-room adjoins the little sitting-
m on the east, and has four windows towards
6 north, with beds ranged in two rows from end
end, and a few more between them, near the op-
eite exiaremity. The door to the sitting-room
ings to the left, and behind it is a table, while
jlass case contains a wax figure of the infant
.yioor, with several sheep. Near the north-eastern
mer are two doors, one of which opens into a
,rrow passage, leading to the head of the great
lase that conducts to the cross street. By this
ge the physician sometimes finds his way to
sick room, when he comes late. He rings the
1 at the pate, which I was told had a concealed
'1, known only to him and the priests, proceeds
stturs and through the passage, rapping three

1 >!

h, K pi*;

•y W| W

imi

PHiS

I ■

MARIA MONK.

times at the door of the sick-room, which is opened
by a nan in attendance, after she has given one rap
in reply. He returns by the same way.

6. Next beyond the siok-room, is a large tlXlo^
cnpied apartment, half divided by two partitions,
which leave an open space in the middle. Here
some of the old nnns meet in the day time.

6. A door from this apartment opens into ano-
ther, not appropriated to any particular use, bnt
containing a table, where medicines are sometimes
prepared by an old nnn. Passing through this room, |
you enter a passage, with doors on its four sides;
that on the left, which is kept fastened on the in< I
side, leads to the staircase and gate ; and that k\
front to private sick-rooms.

7. That on the right leads to another, appro* I
priuted to nuns suffering with the most loathsonu
disease. There were usually a number of straw
matresses in that room, as I well know, haTingI
helped to carry them in, after the yard-man hadl
filled them. A door beyond enters into a store*!
room, which extends also beyond this apartment. Oil
the right, another door opens into another passage,!
erossing which, yon enter by a door,

8. A room with a bed and screen in one conier,|
on which nuns were laid to be examined,
their introduction into the sick-room last mentioneil
Another door, opposite opens into a passage, ii|
which is a staircase leading down.

9. Beyond this is a spare room, sometimes wi\
to store apples, boxes of different things, &c.

10. Ketuming now to the passage which o|
on one side upon the stairs to Uie gate, we enter!
only remaining door, which leads into an apartme

HARIA MONK.

afloally ooonpied by some of Uie old nooB, and fre-
quently by the Superior.

11. and 12. Beyond this are two more siok-
rooms, in one of which those nuns stay who are
waiting their acoonchment, and in the other those
who have passed it.

18. The next is a small sitting-room, where a
priest waits to baptize the infants previous to their
murder. A passage leads from this room on the
left, by the doors of two succeeding apartments
neither of which have I ever entered.

14. The first of them is the ** holy retreat," or
^room occupied by the priests, while suffering the
[penalty of their Ucentionsness.

16. The other is a sitting-room, to whieh they
have access. Beyond these, the passage leads to
[two rooms, containing closets for the storage of
I various articles ; and two others, where persons are
[received who come on business.

The public hospitals succeed, and extend a con-
Isiderable distance to the extremity of the building.

)y a public entrance in that part, priests often come

ito the Nunnery ; and I have often seen some of

lem thereabouts, who must have entered that way.

riests often get into the ** holy retreat," without
Bxposing themselves to the view of other parts ot

le Convent, and have been first known to be there,

|)y the yard-nuns being sent to the Seminary for

leir clothes.

The congregational Nunnery was founded by a

|nm, called Sister Bourgeoise. She taught a school
Montreal, and left property for the foundation of

Convent. Her body is buried, and her heart is
under the Nnnneiy in an iron chest, which has

n 1

MABIA MONK.

been shown to me, with the assnranoe that it eon'
tinaes in perfect preservation, although she has been
dead more than one hundred and fifty years. In the
chapel is the following inscription: ** Soenr Boor-
geoise, Fpndatrice da conyent.** (Sister Boor-
geoise, Founder of the Convent.)

Nothing was more common than for the Superior I
to step hastily into our community-room, while!
numbers of us were assembled there, and hasti
communicate her wishes in words like these :—

**Here are the parents of such a novice; cornel
with me and bear me out in this story." She woqIj
then mention the outlines of a tissue of falsehoodi
she had just invented that we might be prepared
to fabricate circumstances, and throw in whatever!
else might favour the deception. This was jn:
and highly commended, by what we were instructed. I

It was « common remark at the initiation of i|
new nun into the Black nunnery to receive thel
black yeil, that the introduction of another noviei
into the Convent as a veiled nun, always caused tbel
introduction of a veiled nun into heaven as a sainU
which was on account of the disappearance of 8oiDe|
of the older nuns always at the entrance of nei]
ones.

To witness the scenes which often occurred be-l
tween us and strangers would have struck a penotl
most powerfully, if he had known how truth waseiil
at nought The Superior, with a serious and dig^|
nified air, and a pleasant voice and aspect, won
commence a recital of things most favourable to I
character of the absent novice, representiDg ha
equally fond of her situation, and beloved by
oUier inmates. The tale told by the Saperio

MARIA MONK.

owever nnheard before might haye been any of

er statements, was then attested by jib, who in

very way we conld think of, confinned her dedar-

tions beyond the reach of donbt.

Sometimes the Superior wonld intnurt the man-

gement of such a case to the nnns, tohabitaate

I to the practice in which she was so highly ac-

mpUshed, or to relieve herself of what wonld have

een a serious burden to most other persons, and

ascertain whether she could depend upon us.
Iten haye I seen her throw open a door, and say,
a hurried manner, ** Who can tell the best story r'
One point, on which we had receiyed particular
stractions was, the nature of falsehoods. I haye
eard many a speech, and many a sermon ; and I

« !ed to belieye that it was of great importance,
unt; H which it was a duty to be well informed, as
« to act. ** What I" exclaimed a priest one
y^<« what, a nun of your age, and not know the
fferenee between a wicked and a religious lie?**
e then went on, as had been done many times in
[J hearing, to show the essential difference be-
iween the two different kinds of falsehoods. A lie
lid merely for the injury of another, for our own
iterest alone, or for no object at all, he painted as
sin worthy of penance. — ^But a lie told for the
ood of the church or conyent, was meritorious,
id the telling of it a duty. And of this dass of
^es there are many yarieties and shades. This
ioctrine had been inculcated on me and my com-

ions, more times than I can enumerate. We
iftensaw the practice of it, and were frequently

de to take part in it. Wheneyer anything which
le Superior thought important, conld be most ooa-

il 1 '■*'■■' ^■

' 1' ' H 'I '

i 'I A

■,1! .' K' li

ill ,V c '

'ft- ''111

: il" villi 1

MARIA MONK.

Teniently accomplished by falsehood, she resorted
to it wittiont scrapie.

There was a class of cases, in which she more fre-
quently relied on deception than any other.

The friends of noyices frequently applied at the
Convent to see them, or to inquire after their wel
fare. It was common for them to be politely re<
fused an interview, on some account or other, a
mere pretext; and then the Superior sought to
make as f avourahle an impression as possible on
the visitors. Sometimes she would make up a stoiy
on the spot, and tell the strangers ; requiring some
of ns to confirm it in the most convincmg way. Ai
other tunes she would make over to us Uie task oi
deceiving, and we were commended in proportioBl
to our ingenuity and success.

Some nun usually showed her submission, by im*
mediately stepping forward. She would then add,
that the parents of such a novice, whom she named,!
were in waiting, and it was necessary that ihej
■honld be told such and such things. To perfom
to difficult a task well, was considered a difficult
duty, and it was one of the most certain ways to
gain the favour of the Superior. Whoever volnn*!
teered to make a story on the spot, was sent in*
mediately to tell it, and the other nuns present with I
her under strict injunctions to uphold her in evei;
tiling she might state. The Superior, on all such
occasions, when she did not herself appear, hasten*
ed to the apartment adjoining, there to listen
through the thin partition, to hear whether all pe^
formed their parts aright. It was not uncomm(n|
for her to go rather forther, when she wanted tol
give such explanations as she could have desired.1

MARIA HONK.

$he would then enter abraptly, ask, "Who can
3II a good story this morning?'* and hurry us o£f
rithont a moments dehiy, to do our best at a ven-
ire, without waiting for instructions. It would
)e curious, could a stranger from the " wicked
forld'' outside the Convent, witness such a a scene.
)ne of *he nuns who felt in a favourable humour
undertake the proposed task, would step forward,
id signify readmess in the usual way, by a know-
ig wink of one eye, and a slight toss of the head.
"Well, go and do the best yon can," the Supe-
^or would say : " and all the rest of you mind and
raar to it." The latter part of the order, was
Iways performed ; for in every case, all the nuns
isent appeared as unanimous witnesses of every
king tiiat was uttered by the spokeswoman.
We were constantly hearing it repeated, that we
lost never again look upon ourselves as our own;
it must remember, that we were solemnly and ir-
)verably devoted to God. I cannot speak to
Feiy particular with equal freedom : but I wish my
iers to understand the condition in which we
[ere placed, and tiie means used to reduce us to
[hat we had to submit to. Not only were we re-
ad to perform the several tasks imposed upon
at work, prayers and penances, under the idea
iat we were performing solemn duties to our
faker, but everything else which was required of
p, we were constantly told, was indispensable in
dght The priests, we admitted, were the ser-
its of God, especially appointed by his authority,
|teaeh us our duty, to absolve us from sini a^ii
' OB to heaven. Without their assistance, *Wi
allowed we could never enjoy the favoiii oi

MARIA MONK.

God ; unless they administered the sacrament to m,

ve coold not enjoy everlasting happiness. HarJ

ing acknowledged all this, we had no ohjection to

urge against admitting any other demand thai

might he made by them. If we thought an act

ever so criminal, the Superior would tell us thai

the priests acted under the direct sanction of God,

and could not sin. Of course, then, it could not

be wrong to comply with any of their requests, be-l

cause they could not demand any thing but whal

was right. On the contrary, to refuse to do anjl

thing Uiey asked would necessarily be sinful. Sm

doctrines admitted, and such practices performeil,!

it will not seem wonderful that we often felt scsi^l

thing of their preposterous character.

I Sometimes we took pleasure in ridiculing sonul

of the favourite themes of our teachers ; and ij

recollect one subject particularly, that afforded ml

merriment. It may seem irreverent in me to ginl

the account, but I do it to show how things ofil

solemn nature were sometimes treated by woittei|

bearing the title of saints. A Canadian novice, wlii|

spoke very broken English, one day remarked tlutl

she was performing some duty "for the Goif

This peculiar expression had something ridicnloo

to our ears : and it was soon repeated again

again, in application to various ceremonies whichi

had to perform. Mad Jane Bay seized upon!

with avidity, and with her aid it soon took the pli

of a by-word in conversation, so that we were

stantly reminding each other that we were doii

Ihis thing and that thing, ** for the God.'' Na

did we stop here ; when the Superior called

lit to bear witness to one of her religious lieB,ort

MARIA MONK.

ibrieate <he most spnrioiui one the time would ad-
lit* we were sure to he reminded, on onr way to
le 8tranger*8 room, that we were doing it ** for
le God,*' And so it was when other thmgs were
mentioned — every thing which belonged to our oon-
Ktion was spoken of in similar terms.
1 1 have hardly detained the reader long enongh t<w
live him a jnst impression of the stress laid on
}nfes8ion. It is one of the great points to which
jr attention was constantly directed. We were
^ected to keep a strict and constant watoh oyer

• thoaghts ; to have continnally before oar minds,
le roles of die Convent, to remember every devo-

)n, and toll all, even the smallest, at confession,
Ither to the Superior or to the priest. My mind was
^QB kept in a continnal state of activity which
poved very wearisome ; and it required the constant
Kertion of onr teachers, to keep ns up to the prae-

06 they inculcated.

Anotiier tale recurs to me, of those which were

Bqnently told us, to make us feel the importance

unreserved confession.

A nan of our Convent, who had hidden some sin

}m her confessor, died suddenly, and without any

16 to confess her. Her sisters assembled to pray
Lrthepeaceof her soul, when she appeared and
jid, Uiat it would be of no use, but rather trouhle-

16 to her, as her pardon was impossible. The
rine is, that prayers made for souls guilty of

toonfessed sin, do hut sink them deeper in hell;

id this is the reason for not praying for Protestante.

[The authority of the priest in every thing, and
enormifyof every act which opposes it, were
impressed upon our minds, by our toachen.

1 " FiUier*' told xm the following stoiy.

MARIA MOTOt.

■it^

A man once died who had failed to pay soim
money which the priest had asked of him ; heti
condemned to be bnmt in purgatory until he 8hoQ|j|
pay it, but had permission to come back to ibil
world, and take a human body to work in. Bi|
came again on earth, and hired himself to a riel|
man as a labourer. He worked all day, with tlvl

^ fire burning in him, unseen by other people;

'^ while he was in bed that night a girl perceiyingi

smell of brimstone, looked Uirongh a crack in i
waK^ind saw him ooYcred with flfunes. Sheinfoi
ed his master, who questioned him the next moi
and found that he was secretly suffering the pains j
. purgatory, for neglecting to pay a sum of monejl
the priest. He, Sierefore, furnished him with f
amount due; it was paid, and the servant wenti
immediately to heaven. The priest cannot foi
any debt due unto him, because it is the Lord's est
While at confession, I was urged to hide not
from ike priests, Uiey said that ttiey already
what was in my heart, but would not tell, becansel
was necessary for me to confess it. I believed I
the priesto were acquainted with my thoughts;
often stood in awe of them. They often told
fhey had the power to strike me dead at any moma

CHAPTER IX.

Nuns with similar Names— Squaw Nana— First visit to I
Oallar— Deaoription of it— Shocking Diaeovery tb
Saperior'a Inatmetiona—Private Signal of the Pile
Books need in the Nunnery— Opiniona ezpreaaed of I
Bible— Spedmens of what I know of the Seriptureft

I FOUND that I had ieveral namesakes amongf
nuns« two others who had already bome away i

MARIA MONK.

je, Saint Eustace. This was not a solitary case,
there were five Saint Marys, and three Saint
[onros, besides two novices of that name. Of my
_iesakes, I have little to say, for they resembled
jst nans; being so much ont off from intercoorse
^th me and other sisters, that I never saw any thing
them, nor learnt any Uiing worth mentioning.
Several of my new companions were sqnaws, who
id taken the veil at different times. They were
^m the Indian settlements in the oonntry, bat were
^t distingnishable by any striking habits of char-
ter from other nnns, and were not very different
their appearance when in their nsual dress, and
;agcd in their occupations. They were troated
h mnch kindness and lenity by the Superior and
old nnns; and this was done in order to render
Bm as contented and happy in their sitnation as
9sible : and I should have attributed the motives
Ihis partiality to their wishing, that they might
|t influence others to keep away, had I not known
By were, like ourselves, unable to exert such an
inence. And therefore I could not satisfy my
|nd why this difference was made. Many of the
iians were remarkably devoted to the priests, be-
ig every thing they were taught; and as it is
presented to be not only a high honour, but a real
irantage to a family, to have one of its members
Bome a nun, Indian parents pay large sums of
^ney for the admission of their daughters into a
ive&t. The father of one of the squaws, I was
i, paid to the Supedor nearly her weight in sil-
onher reception, althctigh he was obliged to
1 nearly all his property to do it. This he did
lontarily, because he thought himself overpaid by

MABIA MONK.

haying the advantage of her prayers, Belf-eaorifieei,
iio* , for himself and family. The sqnaws sometioui i
served to amuse ns; for when we were partiaiij
dispirited or gloomy, the Superior would send then
to dress themselves in their Indian garments, whief j
usually excited us to merriment.

Among the squaw nuns whom I remember, ^1
one of the Sainto Hypolites, not the one who M
ured in a dreadful scene, described in another puil
of this narrative, but a woman of a more mild aoji
humane character.

A few days after my reception, the Superior soil
me into the cellar for coals; and after she
given me directions, I proceeded down a staixcul
with a lamp. I soon foxmd myself on the
earth, in a spacious place, so dark that I conid
at (mce distinguish its form or size, but I obser
that it had vezy solid stone walls, and was archd
overhead, at no great elevation. Following
directions, I proceeded onwards from the footi
the stairs, where appeared to be one end of ihe(
lar. After walking about fifteen paces, I pa
three small doors on the right, fastened
large iron bolts on the outside, pushed into
of stone work, each having a small opening ai
covered with a fine grating, secured by a sma
bolt. On my left were three similar doors, res
bling these, and opposite them.

Beyond these, tilie space became broader;
doors evidently closed small compartments, p«
{acting from the outer wall of the cellar. I
stepped upon a wooden floor, on which were he
of wool, coarse linen, and other articles, depodii
there for occasional use. I erossed the floor,
found the bare e^rth again under my feet

MABIA MONK.

A little farther on, I fonnd the cellar eontraoted in
Be by a row of olosets, or smaller compartments,
ojecting on each side. These were closed by dif-
rent doors from the first, haying a simple fasten-
£, and no opening through them,
jjnst beyond, on the left side, I passed a stair-
le leading np, and then three doors, mnch resem-
ng those first described, standing opposite three
)re, on the other side of the cellar. Haying passed
»se, I fonnd the cellar again enlarged as before,
d here the earth appeared as if mixed with some
iitiBh snbstanoe» wluch attracted, my attention.
L8 1 proceeded, I fonnd the whiteness increase,
il the surface looked almost like snow, and I oh-
rad before me, a hole dng so deep into the earth
I conld perceiye no bottom. I stopped to ob-
re it— it was cironlar , twelve or fifteen feet across,
le middle of the cellar, and unprotected by any
|b, so that one might easily have walked into it
16 dark.

^he white snbstance was spread all over the sor-

aronnd it ; and lay in snch qnantities on all

^8,'tiiat it seemed as if a great deal mnst have

thrown into the hole. It occurred to me that

[white snbstance was lime, and that this was the

where the infants were bnried, after being

lered, as the Superior had informed me. I

tiiat lime is often used by Roman Catholics

jing places ; and this accounted for its being

[it the spot in snch quantities.

lis was a shocking thought to me ; but I can

py teU^how it affected me, as I had been pre-

' to expect dreadful things, and undergone

whieh preyented me from feeling as I should

ierly have 9one in sin^ilar circumstances.

MAKIA MONK.

Ipaisedtheipot, therefore, with dreadfol thongli^
about the little corpiei which might be in that »j
oret burying place, but with recollections also A
the declarations about the favour done their goQiil
in sending them direct to heayen, and the necessaijl
yirtue accompanying all the actions of the prieskf

There is a window or two on each side neai|l
against the hole, in at which are sometimes throml
articles brought to them from without, for the ui|
of the Convent Through the window on my rigb
which opens into the yard, towards the cross 8tr«
lime is received from carts; I then saw a
heap of it near the place.

Passing the hole, I came to a spot where
another projection on each side, with three cellsl
those I first described. Beyond them, in anofi
part of the cellar, were heaps of vegetab
other things ; and on the left, I found the chi
I was in search of. This was placed in a ha
against the wall, near a small high window, likef
rest, at which it is thrown in. Beyond this
at a short distance, the cellar terminated.

The top, quite to that point, is arched o^erha
though at different heights, for the earth on the I
tom is uneven, and in some places several
higher than in others. Not lilong to be alootl
so spacious and gloomy a part of Uie Convent, i
pecially after the discovery I had made, I '
to fill my basket and to return.

Here then I was in a place which I had coo
ered as the nearest imitation of heaven to befoi
on earth, amongst a society where deeds «
perpetrated, which I had believed to be crimu
and had now found the place, in which ha

MABIA MOMX. W

Jants w«ra nnfe^lingly thrown out of fight, after

sing nmrdered. And yet, sach it the power of in-

jnction end eiample, alUiongh not latisfied, an

jany aronnd me seemed to be, that this was all

^ghteona and proper, I sometimeB was inclined to

i^eye it, for uie priests oonld do no sin. Among

le first instmotions I receiyed from the Superior,

le was to admit priests into the nunnery, from the

_3et, at irregular hours. It is no secret that

riests enter and go out ; but if they were to be

itched by any person in St. Paul's stk act all day

}ng, no irregidarity might be snspecte;} ; and they

light be supposed to Tijut the Convent for the ner .

)nnance of religious ceremonies meroly^

But if a person were near the gate about mid-

ight, he might form a different opinion ; for when

{stray priest is shut out of the Seminary, oris put

the need of seeking a lodging, he is sure of hmkff

liiited into ttie Black Nunnery. Nobody bun the

^est can ring the bell at the sick-room door ; much

I can any but a priest gain admittance. The pull

flie b^ is entirisl^ concealed on the ontside of

kegate.

]He makes himself known as a priest by a hissing

id, made by the tongue against the teeth while

By are kept dosed and the lips open. The nun

|thin, who delays to opan the door until informed

to is there, immediately recognizes tit r; >^lgnal, and

plies with two inarticulate sounds, such as are often

instead of yes, with the mouUi dosed.

le Superior considered this ^mt of my instmc-

unportant, and taught me ^ka signds. I had

en occasion to use them ; I have been repeatedly

led to the door, in the night, while watching in

hi I

■ABIA MOmL

the liek-rooni ; and on reaching it, heavd the hii.
sing sound, then according to my orders, nnf astened
the door, admitted a priest, who was at liberty to go
where he pleased. I will name M. Bierze, from
8t. Denis.

The books nsed in the nnnnery, snoh as I recollect
of them, were the following. Most of these an
lecture books, snoh as are nsed by the daily readen,
while we were at work and meals. These were all
furnished by the Superior, out of her library, to whiok
we never had access. When we had done with tbi
book, it was exchanged for another, as she pleased
to select. La Miroir do Ghrdtien (Christian Wit-
ror,) History of Bome, History of the Church, Lift
of S<flnr Bourgeoise, (the founder of the Conyent,)
in two yolumes, L'AJnge Conducteur (the Guaidiu
AngeU L'Ange Chretien (the Christian Angd)
Les Viet des Saints (Liyes of the Saints,) it
several volumes. Dialogues, a volume condstiiij
of conversations between a Protestant Doctor, call>|
ed Dr. D. and a Catholic gentleman, on the aiticlii{
of faith, in which, after much ingenious reasonini^
the former was confuted ; one large book, the nani
I have forgotten, occupied us nine or ten monthiill
our lectures, night and mominff, L'Instmction
la Jeunesse fthe Instruction of xouth,) con
much about Convents, and the education of pei
in the world, with a great deal on confessions,
Examen de la Conscience (Examination of Com
ence,) is a book frequently used.

I never saw a Bible in the Convent from the
I entered as » novice, until that on which leffi
my escape. The Catholic New Testament, o
monly called the EvangUe, was read to us three

MARIA MOKX.

fonr times a jeir. The Superior directed the read-
ler whftt passageB to select; bnt we never had it in
our hancu to read when we pleased. I often heard
{the Protestant Bible spoken of, in bitter terms, as a
ImoBt dangerous book, and which never onght to bo
the hands of common people.

OHAPTER X.

[•nnfttotara of Bread and Wax candles, carried on In fha
Gonvent—SoperBtitionB—SoapalarieB— Virgin Mary's Pin-
eiuiUon— Her Hoase— *Tbe Bishop's Power orer fire— My
Initmotions to NeTiceS'-Jane Bay-VaoiUation of Feelings.

Large quantities of bread are made in the Black
fannery every week ; for besides what is ne-
BBsaiy to feed the nnns, many of the poor are snp-
Ued. When a priest wishes to give a loaf of bread
a poor person, he gives him an order, which is
«8ented at the Convent. The making of bread is
M most laborions employment in the institntion.
The mannf actore of wax candles was another im-
it brsnch of bnsiness in the nunnery. It was
ried on in a small room, on the first floor, called
[e dergerie, or wax room, oierge being the French
ord for wax. I was sometimes sent to read the
illy lecture and catechism, bat found it a very
Peasant task, as the smell rising from the melt-
iwai gave me a sickness at the stomach. The
^ployment was considered unhealthy, and those
assigned to it who had the strongest constitn-
The nnns who were more commonly em*
^yed in that room, were Saint Maria, Saint Cath-
ie, Saint Charlotte, Saint Frances, Saint Hya-
^e, Saint Hypolite, and others. Bnt with
as with others in the Convent, I was never

MARIA MONK.

allowed to speak, except nnder ciroiimstanceB be*
fore mentioned. I was sent to read and was not
aUowed to answer the most tiiTial question, if one
were asked. Should a nan say, ** What o'clock u
itf V I never dared to reply, but was required tore-
port her to the Superior.

Much stress was laid on the tainte teapulairefOt
holy scapulary. This is a small band of cloth or i
silk, formed in a particular manner, to be
around the neck, by two strings, fastened to
ends. I have made many of §iem ; having
set to make them in the Convent. On one side jii
worked a double cross (thus, + -f) &nd on the
otiior I. H. S. Such a band is called a scapulaij,
and many miracles are attributed to its power, i
Children on first receiving the communion are oftetj
presented with scapularies, which they are
to regard with great reverence. We were told ofl
the wonders e£fected by their means, in the addresi-l
es made to us, by priests, at catechism or lectara|
I will repeat one or two of the stories.

A Boman Catholic servant woman, whohadcon'l
cealed some of her sins at confession, acted so bjf
pocritical a part as to make her mistress belieyelui
a devotee, or strict observer of her duty. She m
imposed upon her confessor so that he gave heri
scapulary. After he had given it, however, one(
the saints in heaven informed him in a vision,!
the holy scapuluy must not remain on the neek i
so great a sinner, and that it must be restored I
the church. She lay down that night with
scapulary round her tiiroat ; but in the momingi
found dead, with her head cut o£P, and the scap
lary was discovered in the church. The belief i

that the d

thing one

to get it o

it was tied

divine po^

Another

taken pziso

teapulaire

the midst o

miracle, an(

by seeing it
I had bee:

MABIA MONK.

that the deyil eonld not endure to have so holy a
thing on one of hie serv ants, and had polled so hard
to get it off, as to dn.^ the dlken thread with which
it was tied, through her neck ; after which , by some
divine power, it was restored to the ohnrch.

Another story. A poor Roman Catholie was once
taken prisoner by the heretics. He had a Saint
teapulaire on his neck, when God, seeing him in
the midst of his foes, took it from the neck by a
miracle, and held it up in the air aboye the throng
of heretics ; one hundred of whom were conyerted,
by seeing it thus supematnrally suspended.

I had been informed that there was a subterrane-
ous passage, leading from the cellar of our Gonyent,
into the Congregational Nunnery ; but, though I
had so often yisited the cellar, I had neyer seen it.
One day, after I had been received three or four
months, I was sent to walk through it on my knees
with another nun, as a penance. This, and other
penances, were sometimes put upon us by the
priests, without any reason assigned. The eom-
mon way was to tell us of the sin for which a pen-
ance was imposed, but we were left many times to
conjecture. Now and then the priest would inform
08 at the subsequent confession, when he happened
to recollect something about it, as I thought, and
not because he reflected or cared much upon the
subject.

The nun who was with me led through the eellar,
passuig to the right of the secret burial-place, and
showed jne the door of the subterraneous passage,
wbjeli was towards the Congregational Nunneiy*
llie reasons why I had not notiMd it before, were,
ihat it was made to shut elose and eyen with tlM

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MABIA MOVK.

w«n ; and fhat part of the oellar was whitewashed.
The door opens with a latoh into a passage about
foor feet and a half high. We got upon our knees,
commenced saying the prayers required, and began
to move slowly along the dark and narrow passage.
It may be fifty or sixty feet in length. When we
reached the end, we opened the door, and found
onrselyes in the cellar of the Congregational Niin>
nery, at some distance from the outer wall. By the
side of the door, was placed a list of names of the
Black Nuns, with a sUde that might be drawn over
any of them. We covered oar names in this man*
ner, as endenoe of having perfonned the duty a8<
signed ns ; and then returned downwards on our
knees, by the way we had come. This penance I
repeatedly performed afterwards ; and by this way,
nuns from the Congregational Nunnery sometimei
entered our Convent for worse purposes.

We were frequently assured that miracles an
still performed ; and pains were taken to impress m
deeply on this subject. The Superior often spoln
to us of the Virgin Mary's pincushion, the remaini
of which are preserved in the Convent, though it
has crumbled quite to dust We regarded this relu
with such veneration, tl^at we were afraid even to
look at it, and we often lieard the following stoiy
related, when the subject was introduced.

A priest in Jerusalem had a vision, when he wu
informed that the house in which the Virgin had
lived, diould be removed from its foundations, and
transported to a distance. He did not think the
communication was horn God, and disregarded it;
but the house was soon after missed, which conyin-
eed him that the vision was true, and he told when

MABIA MONK,

the home might be found. A pietnre of the house
I is preserved m fhe Nuxmery, and wee ihown vs.
I There are also wax figures of Joseph sawing wood,
I and Jesus, as a child, picking op the chips. We
were tanght to sing a song relating to this, the
I eboros of which I remember :

«< Saint Joseph carpentier.
Petit Jesus ramassait les copeauz
Pour faire bouiUir la marmite V

(St Joseph was a carpenter, little Jesus collected
chips to make the pot boil I) I recollect a story
about a family in Italy saved from shipwreck by e
priest, who were in consequence converted, and had
two sons honoured with me priest's office.

I had heard, before I entered the Convent, about
a great fire which had destroyed a number of houses
i in fbe Quebec suburbs, and which some said the
Bishop extmgnished with holy water. I onee heard
i Catiiolie and a Protestant cUsputing on this sub-
i jeot, and when I went to the Congregational Nun-
nery, I sometimes heard the children, alluding to
the ssme story, say at an alarm of fire, ** Is it a Ca-
tholic fire f Then why does not the Bishop run?"

Among the topics on which the Bishop address-
ed the nuns in the Convent, this was one. He told
08 the story one day, that he could have sooner in-
{teifered and stopped the fiames, but that at last,
|findii\g they were about to destroy too many Ca«
Itbolio houses, he threw holy water on the fire, and
extinguished it. I believed this, and also thought
{that be was able to put out any fire.

The holy water which the Bishop has consecra-
Ited, was considered more effiacious than any bles-

MARIA MONK.

fed by a priest: and this it was which was used in
the ConTent in sprinkling onr beds. It has yirtna
in it, to keep off any ayil spirit.

Now that I was a nun, I was sent to read lec-
tures to the novices, as other nuns had been while
I was a novice. There were but few of us who
were thought capable of reading English well
enough, and, therefore, I was more frequently sent
than I might otherwise have been. The Superior
often said to me, as I was going: ** Try to conyert
them— save their souls — ^yon know yon will havei
higher place in heaven for eveiy one yon convert."

For whatever reason. Mad Jane Bay seemed to
take great delight in crossing and provoking the
Superior and old nuns : and often she would cause
an interruption when it was most displeasing to
ttiem. The preservation of silence was insisted
apon most rigidly, and penances of such a natnie
were imposed for breakmg it, that it was 8 constant
■onrcfr of uneasiness with me, to know that I might
infringe the rules in so many ways, and that iiiat>
tention might at any moment subject me to thea
During the periods of meditation, and those of le»
ture, work, and repose, I kept a strict guanl upon
myself, to escape penances, as well as to avoid sin:
tnd the silence of the others convinced me that ihej
were equally watchful from tiie same motives.

My feelings, however, varied at different timei,
and so did those of many of my eompanions, ex-
cepting the older ones, who took their turns in
watching us. We sometimes felt disposed for
gaiety, and threw of all idea that talking was sinfol,
even when required by the rules of the Convent. I
even, when I felt that I might perhaps be doio|

If ABIA MONK.

jng* reflected that eonfession, and penance, would
)on wipe off the goilt.

Bat I soon found out several things important to be

iown to a person Hving nnder such rules. First,

lat it was better to confess to a priest a sin commit-

sd against the rides, because he would not require

16 penance I most disliked, viz., those which ex-

raed me to the observation of the nuns, or which

Bniandedself-debasement before them, like begging

leir pardon, kissing the floor or the Superior's

et, &e., for, as a confessor he was bound to secrecy,

id eoiUd not inform the Superior against me. My

(nscience being as effectually unburdened by my

fession to the priest, I preferred not to teU my

IS to any one else : and this course was preferred

' ottiers for the same good reasons. To Jane Ray,

^wever, it appeared to be a matter of indifference

10 knew her violations of rule, and to what pen-

se she exposed herself.

[Otten while perfect silence prevailed among the

18, at meditation, or while nothing was heard

9pt tiie voioe of ttie reader for the day, no mat-

whose life or writings were presented for our

itemplation, Jane would break forth with some

rk or question, that would attract general at-

^tion, and often eause a long and total interrup-

Sometimes she would make some harmless

lark or inquiry aloud, as if through mere inad*

loy, and then her loud and well known voice,

Id arrest the attention of us all, and incline us

ingh. The Superior usually utterred a hasty

lonstranoe, or pronounce some penance upon her :

I Jane had ever some apology ready, or some

ky ealcufated to irritate more, or to prove thai no

lORIA MONK.

pnnithment would be effectual on lior. Sometiom
■he appeared to be aotaated by oppoiite feelings loj
motiYea; for though ahe delighted in dnwiuj
othera into difficulty, and haa thrown aeyere peoa.
eea upon her fayouritea, on other occaaionB she 1^1
regaraleea of oonaequencea heraelf, and prefemj
to take all the blame, to ahield othera. I have of. I
ten known her to break ailence in the eommnoii^j
aa if ahe had no object beyond that of causing d^
turbance, or exciting a andle, and aa aoon as itnj
noticed, exclaim^ *'Say iVa me, aay it's mfl
Sometimea ahe would expose herself to punishooil
in place of another who waa guilty; and fhuj
found it difficult to understand her. In some (
ahe aeemed out of her wits, aa the Superior i
prieata commonly represented her ; but genenUjlj
aaw in her what prevented me from accounting]
inaane.

Once ahe gaye me the name of the
English Reader," because I waa often appointeJi{
read the lecture to the English girls; and
times, aitting near me, under pretence of dc
would whimr it in my hearing, for ahe knet i
want of aeu-command when excited to Iti
Thua ahe often exposed me to penances for al
of decorum, and set me to bitmg my lips, to m
laughing outright in the midat of a solemn le
** Oh ! yon dcTout English reader t" ahe wonldi
with aomething ao ludicroua, that I had to exerti
aelf to the utmost to avoid observation.

Thia came ao often at one time, that I grewj
eaqr» and told her I must confess it, to unbi
my conscience. Sometimes she would pass 1
Hi as wa stood at dinner ready to sit dowa,i

UAEIA ICONK.

\y moTing hack onr chain, lew ni to fall down
)ii {he floor, and while we were langhing toge-
-ir she would spring forward, kneel to the Snper-
Pand beg her pardon and a penance.

CHAPTER XL

jiins Order from the Superior— Proceed to exeento It
Isoene in en upper Room— Sentence of Death, end Murder
klfy own diBtrese—Beportemade to Friends of St Franeea.

miut now come to a deed in which I had some
k, and which I look back npon with great horror
pahi. In it I was not the principal sufferer.
I not necessary to attempt to ezcnse myself in
or any other case. Those who Judge 'fairly,
make allowances for me, nnder the fear and
), the command and examples, before me. It
aboat fiye months after I took the yeU, the
iher was cool, perhaps in October. One day,
iaperior sent for me and scTeral other nmis, to
W her commands. We found the Bishop and
I priests with her ; and speaking in an unusual
I of fierceness and authority, she said, ** Go to
m for the Examination of Conscience, and
Si Frances up stairs." A command so un-
it irith her tone and manner, excited in me the
; gloomy anticipations. It did not strike me as
lelhat St. Frances should be in the room to
{he Superior directed us; an apartment to
we weie often said to prepare for ttie com-
and to which we Tolontarily went, when«
felt the compunctions which our ^oranoe
;, and the misinstructions wo reeeivedi in-
luto seek relief from seU-reproaoh. Ihadie«|

MABIA MONK.

her thwe a little before. What terrified me vu
first, the Saperior'e angry manner; eeoond, thei
pression she used, a French term, whose me
18 rather softened when translated into drag ;
the place to which we were directed to taJke thei
teresting young nun, and the persons assemliliil
there, as I supposed to condemn her. My m
were such, concerning the fate that awaited her,^!
my horror at the idea that she was in some wiyt
be sacrificed, that I would have given any tUog^
be allowed to stay where I was. Bat I feared I
effects of disobeying the Superior, and pre
with the rest towards the room for the ezami
of conscience.

The room was in the second story, and the]
of many a scene of a shameful nature. It is
eient to say, that things had there occurred wU
made me regard the place with the greatest (
Saint Frances had appeared melancholy for
time. I knew that she had cause, for she hadl
repeatedly subject to trials which I need not
—our common lot When we cached her :
entered the door, my companions standmg
me, as the place was so small as hardly to hoUlj
persons at a time. The young nun was st
alone, near the middle of the room ; she was]
ably about twenty, with light hair, blue eyes^i
very fair complexion. I spoke to her in ai
sionate voice, but with such a decided manner,!
she comprehended my full meaning. ** Saint]
oes, we are sent for you."

Several others spoke kindly to her, but tmj
dressed her very harshly. The poor ereaturet
round with a look of meekness, a&d without e^

IIABIA MONK.

gny nnwillingneM or fear, without eTonipeak-

It word, resigned herself to our hands. The tean

jie into my eyes. I had not a donbt that she con-

lered her fate as sealed, and was already beyond

i fear of death. She was condaoted to the stair-

le, and then seiied by her limbs and clothes,

i ahnost dragged np stairs. I laid my own hands

m her— I took hold of her, too, more gently in-

Bd than some of the rest ; yet I assisted them in

nng her. I oonld not avoid it. My refusal

Id not have saved her, nor prevented her being

ried np ; it wonld only have exposed me to some

rere punishment, as some of my companions

Id have complained of me. All the way up the

ie. Saint 1 ranees spoke not m word, nor

le the slightest resistance. When we entered

room to which she was ordered, my heart sank

me. The Bishop, the Lady Superior, and

I priests, vis.: Benin, Richards, Savage, and two

^ers, were assembled for trial, on some charge of

hnportance.

Mer Richards qnestioned her, and she made
iy, bnt cahn replies. I cannot give a connect-
icconnt of what ensued : my feelings were wrought
|to each a pitch, that I knew not what I did. I
I onder a terrible apprehension that, if I betray-
ly feelings I should fall under the displeasure
^e cold-Uopded persecutors of my poor inno-
; dster ; and this fear and the distress I felt for
|, rendered me almost frantic. As soon as I en-
Y the room, I stepped into a comer, on the left
^e entrance, where I might partiijly support

Blf by leaning against the wall. This support
vented me falling to the floor ; for the confusion of

MAXUL MOKK.

my thonghti wm io great, that only a few of m
words I heard made any lasting impression upon ^^
I felt ai if death would not haye heen more frightii
tome. I am inclined to think that Father RiohnI
wished to shield the poor prisoner from the seveniil
of her fate, hy drawing from her expressions thii
might hear a favonrahle eonstmotion. He askedhn;
among other things, if she was now sorry lor yim
■he had heen overheard to say, (she had heen betnjij|
in hy a nun,) and if she wonld not prefer eonfinenu^l
in the oells to the punishment threatened. Botll
Bishop soon interrupted him, and it was easytoptl
eeiye, that he was determined she should not e8cifi|
In reply to some of the questions she was silent; J
others I heard her reply that she did not repent tf
words she had uttered, though they had been »|
ported by some of the nuns who had heard the
that she had firmly resolyed to resist eyery at
to eompel her to the commission of crimes vb
■he detested. She added that she would ratherd
than eause the murder of harmless babes.
is enough, finish her I" said the Bishop.

Two nuns instantly fell upon her, and in
dienee to directions, giyen by the Superior,
^ared to execute her sentence. She still mainti
ed all ttie cidmness and submission of a lamb.
of those who took psrt in this transaction, 1 1
lieye, were as unwiUing as myself; hut othem
lighted in it. Their conduct exhibited a most bio
tlursty spirit. But aboye all human fiends 1 1
■aw, Saint Hypolite was the most diabolical ; shei
gaged in the hoonid task with all alacrity, andi
med from choice the most revolting parts to bef
formed* She aiezed a gag, forced it into ther~

! the poor nim, t&d when it wm fixed between her
mdadjewf, lo ae to keep them open at their
jiteit possible distanee, took hold of the strapa
itened at each end of the stick, erossed them bo-
ld the helpless head of the victim, and drew them
it through the loop prepared as a fastening,
[he bed which had always stood in one part of
room, still remained there ; though the mnslin
ten, which had been placed before it, with only
efiee fhrongh which a person behind might look
had been folded np on its hinges in the form
W., and placed in a comer. On the bed the
)ner was udd with her face upward, and then
id wifli cords so that she conld not move. In
istant, another bed was thrown npon her. On«
16 priests, named Benin, rorong like a fory first
it, with all his force. He was speedily fol-
by Ihe nans, until there were as many upon
[bed as could find room, and all did what they
]d, not only to smother, but to bruise her. Some
1 ap and jumped upon the poor girl with their
gome mil their knees : and others, in difibrent
seemed to seek how they might best beat the
i out of her body, and mangle it, without com-
direct contact with it, or seeing the efiiBcta
^eir Tiolence. During this time, my feelings
I tlmost too strong to be endured. I felt stu*
1, snd scarcely was conscious of what I did.
I fear for myself induced me to some exertion ;
.ittempt^d to talk to those who stood next»
that I might have an excuse for turning away
l&e dreadful scene.

the lapse of fifteen or twenty minutes, and
iikwispxesomed that the sufferer had been

•0

MABIA MOMK.

Bmothered and crashed to deaih, Father Bonininj
the nans ceased to trample upon her, and steppej
from the hed. All was motionless and silent h^\
neath it. They then began to laugh at snch inhiiil
man thoughts as occnired to some of them,
each other in the most unfeeling manner, andiid!!
fouling me for feelings which I in vain endeavonRjl
to conceal. They alluded to the resignation (i|
our murdered companion ; and one of them tam^f
ingly said, ** She would have made a ^ood GathQlii|
ma^yr.'* Then one of them asked if the coml
should be removed. The Superior said it had!
ter remain a litUe while. After waiting a si
time, the feather-bed was taken off, the cords
loosed, and the body taken by the nuns and draggi
down stairs into the cellar, and thrown intoi
hole which I have already described, covered
ft great quantity of lime ; and afterwards sprii
with a liquid, of the properties and name of vit
I am ignorant. This liquid I have seen ponredi
the hole from large bottles, after the necks v(
broken off; and Lave heard that it is used in Fr
to prevent the effluvia rising from cemeteries.

I did not soon recover from tiie shock caused
this scene ; it still recurs to me, with mostglo
impressions. The next day, there was a melancl
aspect over every thing, and recreation time[
in the dullest manner ; scarcely any thing wu^
above a whisper. I never heard much said
wards about Saint Frances.

I spoke with one of the nuns a few words, 0De||
but we were all cauticmed not to expose oi
very far, and could not place ranch reliance ine
other. The murdered nun had been broagbt tol

MARIA MONK.

Hhockmgend ihxongh the treachery of one of our
number in whom she confided. I never knew with
certainty who had reported her remarks to the Sa-
)erior, bnt snspicion fastened on one, and I never
ioald regard her bat with detestation. I was more
Inclined to blame her than some of those employed in
ae execution ; for there conld have been no neces-
lity for the betrayal of her feelings.
I was often sent by the Superior to overhear what
ras said by novices and nans, when they seemed to
inn her: she wonld say, ** Go and listen, they are
nealoDg English ;" and though I obeyed her, I
lever informed her against them. If I wished to
learmy conscience, I woald go to a priest and
jonfess, knowing that he dared not commanicate
^hat I said to any person, and that he woald not
^oose as heavy penances as the Superior.
h were allowed to choose another confessor when
fe had any sin to confess, which we were unwilling
tell one to whom we should otherwise hare done.
It long after this murder a young woman came to
[enmmery, and asked for permission to see St.
fl. It was my former friend, with whom I
been an assistant teacher. Miss Louisa Bous-
fet, of St. Denis. From this, I supposed the
iered nun might have come from that town, or
|ncinity. The only answer was, that St Frances
I dead. Afterwards some of St. Frances* friends
led to inquire after her, and they were told that
died a glorious death ; and had made some
Ivenly expressions, which were repeated in order
itisty her friends.

Iiffif

m\f\

fefrL

li'i,

MARIA MONK.

GHAPTEB XIL

Description of the Boom of the three States, and the PietiUM
in itwane Bay— ridionling Priests— their criminal Tren.!
ment of ns at Confession— Jane Bay's tricks with the Niui|l
Apronsy Handlcerehieft, and Night Gowns— Apples. '

The pictnres in the room of the three States wen
large, and painted by an artist who knew how li
ma£e horrible ones. They appeared to be stnch
the walls. The light is admitted from small
windows, curtained, so as to make every thing looji
gloomy. They iold ns that they were painted U
an artist, to whom God had given power to ri
sent things exactly as they are in heaven, heE
purgatory.

In heaven, the pictore of which hangs on oneoi
of the apartment, multitudes of nuns and priests
put in tiie highest places, with the Virgin Maiy
their head, St. Peter and other saints, far above
great numbers of good Catholics of other i
who are crowded in below.

In purgatory are multitudes of people ; and in
part, called '* The place of lamhst" are infants
died unbaptized. ** The place of darkness" is
part of purgatory in which adults are cell
there they are surrounded by flames, waiting to
delivered by the prayers of Uie living.

In the picture of hvsll the faces were the most
rible that can be imagined. Persons of M
descriptions were represented, with the most
iorted features, ghastly complexions, and
variety of dreadnil expression: some with
beasts gnawing at their heads, others faiii
biiiing the iron bars which kept them in, with
which could not fail tG make a spectator shai

i i

■"WA iroHK.

were not Knng, md the imSowS "" %"«•
U feelings wi. powflrfnTTZ^fSl*^ J^* "»

■wanung. It u the hottest Dhuse irrhTii f ' " •
Jiiin that to which ProtMfafnJf - .' '"'' "owe

Knse they «re no? ^^t ^ ^'^^^ ' ^•

jhich they are perverted. Wh«,«„T '•*!*' ''J'
H room, aa 1 was g8««i.**' I ""»*"«' to

'le,4mesde,fldetotoSsfe ' r^*"* '«'
kithfnl ones who hayeS K? ' •*''* *'"^' °'a»ois^
j.ye no whtions U^V^y'^^^T^'r' <^i
kag8 were of the most paLwde!l-n'?*°'- ^^

Ue Superior to harh«^"'d^".?™P«P<«^^
bed, "go and let ont thai j«^i V "<»> 8her».
L than aU the resl" j,^*^' fj" "?"*« •»» «»
•M ! and she gave iamea^ »?^ "°* *''^»w> «««
.HMs in the /iotuwr f^ "f^^.."' '''« worst
k » seat behinH ennb^J'*5''"«'»-'Jay8 she

U coold not see her. wfcL''r' .*''"• «>«
fc would make na Ungh. .. v^J^^ «»• mm.
We to your lesson J you JSIT .??* " »'"
h while we tried to sopp^M^n ,*?>'> would
P«ne would then hoM nn ♦? 2^' '^nghter.

• •» the fMss S " heU " ^tS" '?"'P'«^ with
^i harfly p«serve ow «^t'' '?»* *«» wa
J atmed the WMtch who ^ hm„ ' /^^embw
N, with • serpent Sni^£ «» tte bar.

BIARIA MONK.

would say — *' Does he not look like him, when he
comes in to catechism with his long solemn lace
and begins his speeches with, ** My children, nj \
hope is that yon have lived very devont lives?'"

The first time I went to confession after taldii^
the veil, I found abundant evidence that the piiesii I
did not treat even that ceremony, which is calledi
solemn sacrament, with respect enough to lay asidi
the shameless character they so often showed m
other occasions. The confessor sometimes satigl
the room for the examination of conscience, anil
sometimes in the Superior's room, and always i
except the nun who was confessing. He hadil
common chair placed in the middle of the floor, uil
instead of being placed behind a grate, or lattM^I
as in the chapel, had nothing before or aronndhial

A number of nuns usually confessed on thai
day, but only one could be admitted into the
at a time. They took their places just withoatf
door, on their knees, and went through the prep
ation prescribed by the rules of confession; rep
?ng certain prayers, which occupy a consider
time. When one was ready, idie rose from
knees, entered, and closed the door behind litj
and no one dared touch the latch until she
out

I shall not tell what was transacted at such i
under the pretence of confessing, and receivingj
solution from sin $ tar more sin was often ii
than pardon ; and crimes of a deep dye were
mitted, while trifling irregularities in childish (
monies, were treated as serious oflTences. Ii
persnade myself to speak plainly on such a so
as I ttust offend the virtuous ear. I can osljj

MARTA MONK.

thatsaspicion cannot do any injnstioe to the priests,
because their sins cannot he exaggerated.

Some idea maj he formed of the manner in which
even such women as many of my sister nnns, re-
Iffarded the fatiier confessors, when I state that
l^ere was often a contest among ns, to avoid enter-
ling the apartment as long as we could ; endeavonr-
ig to make each other go first, as that was what
lost of as dreaded.

Paring the long and tedious days which filled np
je time between Sie occurrences I have mentioned,
lotUng or little took place to keep up our spirits,
^e were fetigued in body with labouTt or witii sit-
ting, debilitated by the long continuance of our re-
ligioas exercises, and depressed in feelings by our
niserable and hopeless condition. Nothing but the
inmoiirs of mad Jane Bay could rouse us for a mo-
lent from our languor and melancholy.

To mention all her deyices, would require more

9m than is here allowed, and a memory of bX-
lost all her words and action for years. I had

rly become a favourite with her, and had oppor-

lity to learn more of her character than most of
le other nuns. As this may be learned from hear-
ig what she did. I will here recount a few of her
ricks, just as they happen to present themselves to
Aj memory, without regard to the order of time.

She one day, in an unaccountable humour sprink-
Bd the floor plentifully with holy water, which
brought upon her a severe lecture from the Supe-
|ior, as might have been expected. The Superior
lid it was a heinous offence : she had wasted holy
^ater enough to save many souls from purgatory :
&d what would they not give for it 1 She then or-

i'ti'l

5' .';.:''iHS!l%i|IU

ji i

MABIA MONK.

dered Jane to git in the middle of the floor, uj
when the priest came, he was infonned of her of<
fence. Instead, however, of imposing one of tiiose
penances to which she had been snbjected, bnt with
so little effect, he said to her, *' Go to your place,
Jane ; we f wgive jon this time.*'

I was once set to iron aprons with Jane ; aproni
and pocket handkerchiefs are the only articles of
dress which are ever ironed in the Convent. As soon
as we were alone, she remarked, ** Well we are free
from the rales, while we are at this work;" and, al-
though she knew she had no reason for saying so,
she began to sing, and I soon joined her, and thm
we spent the time, while we were at work, to the
neglect of the prayers we ought to have said.

We had no idea that we were in danger of being
overheard, but it happened that the Superior was
overhead all the time, with several nuns, who wen
preparing for confession : she came down and said
** How is this?'' Jane Bay coolly replied, that we
had employed our time in singing hymns, and re-
ferred to me. I was afraid to confirm so direct i
falsehood, in order to deceive the Superior, thongh
I had often told more injurious ones of her fabrica-
tion, or at her orders, and said very little in replj
to Jane*8 request.

The Superior plainly saw the trick that was at-
tempted, and ordered us both to the room for the
examination of conscience, where we remained till
night, without a mouthful to eat. The time wai
liot, however, unoccupied ; I received such a Ie&
tu>ce from Jane as I have very seldom heard, and
rho was so angry with me, that we did not 8]
to each other for f wo weeks.

HASU KONK.

Aft length she found lomeihiiig lo eomplain of

Jnflft me* had me subjected to a penanoe, which

to our begging each other's paidon, and we be-

le perfeotlj satisfied, reconciled, and as good

riends as ever.

One of the most disgusting penances we had ever
gabmit to, was that of drinking the water in
rhich the Smperior had washed her feet. Nobody
3dd ever langh at this penance except Jane Bay.
She would pretend to comfort ns, by saying she
Fas sore it was better than mere plain clear water.
Some of the tricks which I remember, were play-
by Jane with nans' clothes. It was a role that
^e oldest aprons in nse shoold go to the yonngest
eeeived, and that the old nnns were to wear all
lie new ones. On four different occasions, Jane
ole into fJie sleeping-room at night, and nnob-
Brved by (Jie watch, changed a great part of the
pions, placing them by the beds of nnns to whom
tiey did not belong. The consequence was, that
the morning they dressed themselves in such
Bte, as never to discover the mistake they made,
DtU they were all ranged at prayers ; and tiien the
Idicdons appearance which many of them cut,
pstnrbed the long devotions. I laugh so etaj that,
saeh occasions, I usually incurred » full share
[penances. I generally, however, got a new apron,
[hen Jane played this trick ; for it was part of her
l)jeot to give the best aprons to her favourites, and
it off the ragged ones on some of the old nuns
liom she most hated.

IJine once lost her pocket-handkerchief. The

^nanee for such an ofiSence is, to go without any

' Ave weeks. For this she had no relish, and re*

MARIA MONK.

qaested me to pick one from some of the nans on
tiie way np stain. I succeeded in getting two ; tbia
Jane said was one too many, and she thought it
dangeroas for either of ns to keep it, lest a search
should be made. Very soon the two nuns were
complaining that they had lost their handkerchiefs,
and wondering what could have become of them, u
fhey were sure they had been careful. Jane seized
an opportunity, and slipped one into a straw bed,
where it remained until the bed was emptied to be
filled with new straw.

As the winter was coming on, one year, she com'
plained to me that we were not as weU supplied with
warm night-clothes, as two of the nuns she named,
whom she said she ** abominated.'' She soon aftei
found means to get possesion of their fine wami
flannel night-gowns, one of which she gave to me,
while the other was put on at bedtime. She pte*
sumed the owners would have a secret search for
them; and in the morning hid them in the stoTtji
after the fire had gone out, which was kinged i
little before the hour of rising, and then suffered to |
bum down.

This she did evmy morning, taking them ont i\
night through the wmter. The poor nuns who owo<
ed the garments were afraid to complain of their
loss, lest Uiey should have some penance laid oil
them, and nothing was ever said about them. Whes
the weather began to grow warm in the spring, JaoiJ
returned tiie night-gowns to the beds of the noiii|
from whom she had borrowed them, and theywenj
probably as mueh surprised to find them again,
fhey had been before at losing them.

Jane once found an opportunity to fill her apr

MARIA MONK.

ith a qnantity of fine apples, ealled/am«tf Mt , whiob

Doe in her way, and hastening up to the sleeping

jm, hid them under my bed. Then ooming down,

le informed me, and we agreed to Apply for leave

make our eleyens, as it is called. The meaning

this is, to repeat a certain roond of prayers, for

je days in sncoession, to some saint we choose to

IdresB for assistance in becoming more charitable,

feotionate, or something else. We easily obtained

.. dssion, and hastened upstairs to begin onr nine

lys' feast on tiie apples; when, much to onr snr-

186, they had all been taken away, and there was

I way to avoid the disagreeable fate we had brought

ion ourselyes. Jane, therefore, began to search

[ebeds of the other nuns: but not finding any

Be of the apples, she became doubly vexed, and

lek pins in £ose that belonged to her enemies.

[When bedtime came, they were much scratched

[getting into bed, which made them break silence,

tiiat subjected them to penances.

CHAPTER XIIL

I Bi/i Trioks oontinved— The broomstlok Ghost—Sleep-
ilking— Salted Cider— Changing Beds— Objeots of some
[her tirieka— Feigned Humility— Alarm.

^NE night, Jane, who had been sweeping the

ping-xoom for a penance, dressed up the broom-

if when she had completed her work, with a

doth on the end, so tied as to resemble an

reman dressed in white, with long arms eyok-

li This she stuck through a broken pane of

and iplaced it so that it appeared to be looking

; the window, by the font of holy water. There

■I

IIABU MONK*

it lemained till ttie nmiB came up to b«d. The fini
who stopped at the font, to dip the finger in,
eanght a gUmmie of the singular object, and started
with terror. The next wafp equally terrifiedi as she
approached, and the next, 9.m the next.

We all believed in ghosts ; and it was not wot
derfal that such an object should cause alarm, es^
cially as it was but a short time after the death i j
one of the nuns. Thus they went on, each
a fright in turn, jet all afraid to speak. At length {
one more alarmed, or with less presence of
than the rest, exclaimed, **0h, mon Oieul jeui
me concherais pas 1" When the nighi watch caijti
out ** Who's thatf' she confessed she had brokeij
silence, but pointed at the cause ; and when all tin
nuns assembled at a distance from tho windorj
Jane offered to advance boldly, and ascertain tiii|
nature of the apparition, which they thought a noij
resolute intention. We all stood looking on, wli
she stepped to the window, drew in the broomsfa'd
and shawed ns the ridiculous puppet which
alazmed so many superstitlouB fears.

Some of her greatest feats she pexformed u\
sleep-walker. Whether she ever walked in
sleep or not, I am unable, with certainty, to
She, however, often imposed upon the Snpeii
and old nuns, by making them think so, whei
knew she did not; and yet I cannot positivelyi
tiiat she always did. I have remarked that ontj
tiie old nuns was always placed in our si
room at night, to watch us. Sometimes shei
be inattentive, and sometimes fall int.' a
Jane Bay often seized such times to rise from I
bed, and walk about, occasionally seizing oml

«^U MONK. ^

le nang in bed, In ordm* i^ jl; vx

r of n. fhguenay broke XS' id^ •'^•
won to the Snperior to lay n. ™j **''• «»*■

buiKl, while Jme neMn»^.l-^?" ""•»»?-
compMsion: "PoororB«tnr«rft expressions
U^e were in perfwt^lSe^*!.,'?'^'* »»» do
Id Jane displa/ed hM'™^m?l**'ij"»««>n-"

Miyed that the old Sm was m-^ T° " *•
V die would throw her mZ'^iJ: '^ *** «»>»«w

«>io«8 of what Bhe"wM dofarf^^S**" "»■
e^^fc^i^^Wen'

teSerXiSTerr -ej^o^-haTU
J. -ere once alloZl to ZK^ '«""«fy-
t«h WM quite an extrsSrS, fl ' " *^«.
fntt, on aeconnt of W „. i^ ''^°»»- J«ne.
I denied toepri^Zf ^j^^fr""* <? "U work

nevr drink, bot it was ««?.«' ** '*8«> to taste
k xWof „ whfiw'^.' """^"^ not «w«?

looked aronnd, till tha^i. " ^*"™ onr cups,

h««y, which thevaHsoon^?' '"/''• «" ««»•
bmme manne*. 8o!?°\*^> ""^ "ost of them

Wmg the salted cider7and S *'''S»»'*<>«
Hmtoss, would cry onuf " **''' n™.

I ta casses la silence » /-ah
i^^ -uence. (Ah I you've broken

P«tZ^nl?'*^f^g' '"•^'"'i on,
I '»■"«"• «»eew«tionflMrtdv,tte

A^'!

"■ ^

'4>,

IMAGE EVALUATION
TEST TARGET (MT-3)

1.0

M 12.5

u, m

111

1.1

= IIIIIM

L25 III U 1116

Photographic

Sciences

Corporation

23 WBT MAIN STRUT

WItSTIR.N.Y. MStO

(716) 172-4303

■ABU MONK.

lint gnestfon asked by many of ns was, '* How dij
yon uke your oiderf'

Jane Bay never had a fixed place to sleep in.
When the weather began to grow warm in the spring,
she nsnally poshed some bed oat of its place, neir
a window, and pnt her own beside it i and when tht
winter approached, she wonld choose a spot neir
-the stove, and occnpy it with her bed, in spite of lO i
remonstrance. We were all convinced that it is I
generally best to yield to her.

She was often set to work in different ways ; bnl;
whenever she was dissatisfied with doing any thio^
wonld devise some trick that would make the Si^
perior or old nuns drive her off ; and wheneveriif
suspicion was expressed of hei^ beinff in her rigii
mind, she wonld say that she did not know whatii
was doing ; and all the difficulty arose from her »
peating prayers too much, which wearied and §
tracted her mind.

I was once directed to assist Jane Bay in i
the beds of the nuns. When we came to thorn
some of the sisters whom she most disliked, shei
now we will pay them for some of the penaneei
have suffered on their account; and taking
thistles, she mixed them irith the straw. At i
the first of them that ffot into bed felt the
and eriusd out. The n^ht-watch exclaimed as i
** Ton are breaking silence there." And them
ther sereamed as she was aeiatehed by the thU
and another. The old nun then eaUed on ill i
had broken nlenoe to rise, and ordered them toi
onder their beds as a penance, which they
complied with* Jane and I afterwards ooofM

MABIA MOmL

when it wm all over, and took some trifling penance
which the prieit imposed.

Those nuns who fell most under the displeasure of
mad Jane Bay, as I have intimated before, were those
who had the reputation of being most ready to in-
f onn of the most trifling faults of others, and especi-
ally those who acted without any regard to honour,
I by diflclosing what they had pretended to listen to
{in confidence. Several of the worst-tempered
» saints'* she held in abhorrence ; and I haye heard
I her say, that such and such she abominated. Many
a trick did she play upon these, some of which were
painful to them in their consequences, and a good
nomber of them have neyer been traced to this day.
[Of all the nuns, howeyer, none other was regarded
by her with so much detestation as St Hypolite ; for
lihewasdwaysbelieyedtohaye betrayed St Frances,

id to haye caused her murder. She was looked
hpon by us as the yoluntary cause of her death, and
Id the crime whieli those of us committed, who un-
linglyi took part in her execution. We, on the

itruy, being under the worst of fears for our-

1t68, in case of refusing to obey our masters and
i, thought oursdyes chargeable with less

lilt, as unwillmg assistants in a scene which it was

ipoiisible for us to preyent or delay. Jane has of-
spoken with me of the suspected informer, and

Iways in terms of the greatest bitterness.

formad Jane Bay, but I neyer could tell whether she
ly belieyed her insane or not I was always in-

lined to think, that she was willing to put up with
le of her tricks, because they seryed to diyert our
idsfrom the painful and depressingeiioumstUMef

KABIA MONK.

in whieh we were placed. I knew the Snperioi'i
powers and habits of deception also, and that she
woold deceiye ns as willingly as any one else.

Sometimes she proposed to send Jane to St. Aime'i
a place near Qaebeo, celebrated for the pilgrim.
ages made to it by persons differently afflicted. Itii
supposed ttiat some peculiar Tirtue exists then,
which will restore health to the sick; and I ban
heard stories told in corroboration of the common
belief. Many lame and blind persons, with othen^
Tisit St. Anne's eyery year, some of whom may be
seen travelling on foot, and begging their food. TJii
Superior woidd sometimes say that it was apity tlut {
a woman like Jane Bay, capable of being so \
should be unable to do her duties, in conseqaeneti
of a malady which she thought might be cored \ij\
a Tisit to St, Anne's.

Yet to St. Anne's Jane was never sent, and tel
wild and yaiious tricks continued as before. Tkl
rules of silence, which the others were so scrapo
in observing, she set at nought every hour; audi
for other rues, she regarded them with as littlei
spect when they stood in her way. She would i
and then step out and stop the clock by whieh
exercises were regulated, and sometimes in thisi
ner lengthened out our recreation till near tve
At last the old nuns began to watch against
trick, and would occasionally go out to see if i
clock was going.

She once mMe a request that she might noti
with the other nuns, which was granted, as it se
to proceed from a spirit of genuine humility,
made her regard herself as unworthy of our i

It being most convenient, she was sent to thil

^'^i^ MONK.

Ijtter food ttCtt?Sf^,t""*55^«f«mg,S;,'J
<M «ttp«rted, at the bottom o?eT«^?K ""^ ^^ •*

lome employment. """ *» '»«m1> W with

She deelaied to m that she w„-m ,

lut tbe (tore by which th»- ' .'* '••PPened
""••d in the 4.teXd^L'r"'""V<>o« wS
k. floor of onr "leepSig cl±fir."^*^ """"Jrh
m . direotion oppSdg ffi, ';?''i*«'«» «««■
MrtoTewaeean&l It i^ »'"«'> ""Pipe of

N to oni beds, mHSe'^.tf^;.'? l"* •» w-'
kw,wewe»roddeSjM2IS* ^ *" "Uw*
^. whWi bunt W&fe 1^5."*^" "«•

-r wrbnndng. «d n^fc SL*^^*' ""^M-

^*«^tetheiUmMMZ?P- ''^••O'MilMat
"«•■»«.• «o» beneath. h«,?^;k*^-g^

MARIA MOMK.

wet powder on the end of her broom, thrast it m
ihron^h the hole in the ceiling into onr apartmenL
and with a lighted paper set it on fire.

The date of this alarm I most refer to a time soon
after that of the election riots ; for I recollect thit
the found means to get possession of some of tbi
powder which was prepared at that time for an ein»
gency to which some thought the Convent was ex.
posed.

She once asked for pen and paper, and then tin
Superior told her if she wrote to her friends abi
must see it. She replied that it was for no snek
puipose : she wanted to write her confession, d
thus make it once for all. She wrote it, handed i
to the priest, and he gave it to the Superior,
read it to us. It was full of offences wmoh die
neTcrcommitted, evidently written to throw
on confessions, and one of the most ludicrou
duetions I ever saw.

Our bedsteads were made with veiy narrow
laid across them, on which the beds were laid.
day, while we were in the bedchambers to|ei
she proposed that we should misplace these
This was done, so that at night nearly a dozen
fell down upon the floor on getting into bed. A
deal of coitfusion naturally ensued, but the ail
were not discovered. I was so conscience-si
however, that a week afterwards, while we weiti
vnining our consciences together, I told her I
confess the sin the next day. She replie^l, *' '
you like, but yon will be sony for it"

The next day, when we came before the Sai
I was Just going to kneel and confess, when
almost without giving me time to shut the

I o ••» una

F5*»«Ponthe
^f»* threatened
*^« was mii

. oveisJe
^ »• mote 8(

'ft»whether
L|!?*^«qne8ti<

r '^^«n it wi

'/name, as
to reply •

MAKU MONa.

L for tb. tin iWZ^^T^''^''*^'^ npon

There nw an old nan who™, m
Whom we used to oaU^La mI!? ^**"« *^e».
^ht J«,. Bay got ^ ^j S^i^"?*')- One

tat In the moiBinir ffi«L' ^* '"" •""ong the
adenehaeceiiegeldomoccnn!?^ geat confnsion,
toed by La Mew, havW^ j ^he wasaeverely
/ xno. of the nnna': ^fc if <«»«d -gainst

«»g«J.ttat«heattacSdttoiJdt!f*°"' *» ""»«'>
»k her by the throat iTm^!???' ""' *'«
Hi to come to her aaOabuLfT^/*"^ <» all Pre-

h Wnaiw,, to beat wae Kr^ "?»"»«<» »
fcte lererely, and afteinr.li ?•'.''<>"»* enemiea
m to kaf ^ome K^J^;?' .«»•* *• haH?
[For a tune JanT.^* ^f*"^' infomera.
I, that the SapeHn^J^a.1^ '" "">"* «» P»t.

btoileepttthemoriC: Wl^*!.** **l»rtu.
* "he was forbidden tol^t foSl" ^r*' '<>«««
|l«"ng it, and then she woS^'^il" ^S»i^ af-
h>My <m the floor. TWi.???"»<»«'«aiid
fcWthmtenedueif JL««?if*^''^ "■ «' •"•

^ tunes OFersleep henOp^^ 'i '"'• ''""Jd
h? he nore strict, aSdjl^^ ^' ?°P«^«' «>•-
hfcwhether JaiXjZSV^^l'r!^ » tte
P« the qnestion was^inl^ ''*' ?!«••

J^.awe. as, ""'essed to some non near

P?2SSr- ^'-—Kayin her placet" th«.

MARIA MOMS.

Of ill the Boenes that ooeiunrad during my itayia
the Oonvent, there was none which excited the da*
light of Jane moie than one which took place in thi
chapel one day at mass, though I never had mj
particular reason to suppose that she had brongbt
it about.

Some person unknown to me to this day, hadpgi
some substance or other, uf a most nauseous smeli,
into the hat of a little boy, who attended at the il'
tar, and he, without observing the trick, put it npoi
his head. In the midst of Ihe ceremonies he ipi
proached some of the nuns, who were almost snll
cated with the odour; and as he occasionally moTi
from place to place, some of them began to
to him to stand further o£P and to hold their noss,
with looks of disgust. The boy was quite nncoi-
iciouB of the cause of the dii&culty, and paid tbaj
no attention, but the confusion soon became so
through the distress of some, and the laughing
others, that the Superior noticed the ciroumsi
and beckoned the boy to withdraw.

All attempts, howevery to engage us in any^wi
prayer, or meditation, were found ineffectual.
ever the circumstances in the chapel came to
we would laugh out. We had got into such a
that we could not easily restrun ourselves.
Superior, yieldingto necessity, allowed us recrei
for the whole day.

The Superior used sometimes to send Janetoi
struct the novices in their English prayers.
would proceed to the task with all seriousness;
sometimes chose the most ridiculous, as welli
rent passages from thtf* songs, and other t1
which she had sometimes learned, which wonUi

oSf who lu

rhymes, In

"The I

Dponth

Jane for a I

light would X

'talkwithn

)tani again i

She would I

-idsoohassh

iogh so loud,

igwithbeggi

vne winter's

^•hehaddi
Mi**myfln«
•gain." *

The next daj
J»we it was i
B«ed with a fit
^ennpappaw,
«• She comp
>™ofthed^
" was denied
rf^ir nnder
pit from the t«
M «nd refieved
[One of the thin
'^•••disposfl
ledtobewin"
|e wonid never
"into some dii

^^nn^hersud
^Pwceshecoulf

Of, who ondentood her hn<.i.;.- ^

Ajam, IweoDeet, b«g2 H^^'' °»« •' hef

.Wkwittn.e.'wUohX&'iS^^*?»y '«^'
itam .gam with «,«! cantio? *'"'^'' "»*
She would teU me of the wl| .h. i. ^ .

Jdwd. «,hemedit«ted, JSwm^^!* pUyed.
mgh 10 loud, that I had mn-if * 5 . " ""ike me
ig with begring WdMM ^y^ to «o in the mom-

te Ae h«l doaSC'CjTi iL''*?* • ««» S bit

£r»^i^rmid^r^^*«i'r'

Mrf mtt a fit while mJ^T^^^J^ been

tempafpawntlyingenriMf .„j ""^ ** '••
A She complaied to^« i J^* ?9?wyed to her

Hongnndermy dwm I^ P«wnaded to pin
Boitftomthetabii. iS'g?ii"«*«"y P-t f^
fc ttd reKeved hw wante '*^*''^' '^"i^ to

ptobeSiwdS^«'»^'"a»«,ynnn who

Kwonld never rest naffl^Xdl^' 8»P«rio'-
Nto some difflonlty brought sneh •

&hS".:Sy'"n2S:'"P'- «dJ«e.when
f.W,h.eoJ?&!t^|«^.-^d^kettS

IW 14

ih^.^:

UNI

MABIA MOHK.

tnl feanh mad« for a large piece that wai missed ;
when, ioon after I had Men learehed, Jane Bij
passed me, and slipped it into my pocket ; she sooq
after was searched herself , and then secretiy oami
for it again.

While I recall these particnlars of our Noimeij,
and refer so often to the conduct and language of
one of the nnns, I cannot speak of some things which
I belieyed or suspected, on acconnt of my want of
sufficient knowledge. But it is a pity yon have not
Jane Ray for a witness ; she knew many things of
which I am ignorant. She mast be in possession d
facts that shonld be known. Her long residence in
the^Oonyent, her habits of roaming about it, and of
observing every thing, must have made her aoqnaist'
ed with tilings which would be heard with interest
I always felt as if she knew every thing. She would
often go and listen, or look through tiie cracks into
the Superior's room, while any of the priests wen
eloseted with her, and sometimes would come dl
tell me what she witnessed. I felt myself bod|
to confess on such occasions, and always did so.

She knew, however, that I only told it to tlsl
priest or to tiie Superior, and without mentioiiiii||
the name of my informant, which I was at
to withhold, so that she was not found out. Id
said to her, *' Don't tell me, Jane, for I most
fess if She would reply, ** It is better for yoit
confess it than for me." I thus became, even i
my will, informed of scenes supposed by thei
of them to be secret

Jane Bay once persuaded me to accompanj
into the Superior's room, to hide with her nnderl
sofa, and await the appearance of a visitor wboni

HARTA MOHK*

101

expeoied, that we might oTer-hear what puied be-
tween them. We had been long eonceiued, when
the Soperior eame in alone, and aat lor come time;
when, fearinff she might detect na in the atillneaa
which prevailed, we besan to repent of onr temerity,
At length, howeyer, uie anddenly withdrew, and
thus afforded ni a welcome opportunity to escape.
I was passing one day throngn a part of the ceUar,
where I had not often occasion to go, when the toe
I of my shoe hit something. I tripped and fell down,
I rose again, and holding my lamp to see what had
eanied my fall, I fonnd an iron ring, fastened to a
[imiill square trap-door. This I had the onriosity
Ito raise, and saw four or five steps down, but there
[was not light enongh to see more, and I feared to
be noticed by somebody and reported to the Snpe-
rior; so, dosing the door again, I left the spot. At
Irst I coiUd not imagine the nse of such a passage ;
^Qt it afterwards occurred to me that it might open
the subterranean passage to the Seminary ; for I
fteyer could before account for the appearance of
liny of the priests, who often appeared and disap-
Bd among us, particularly at night, when I knew
.. jates were closed. They could, as I now saw,
ome up to the door of the Snpeiior's room at any
mx\ tiien up the stairs into our sleeping-room, or
fheie tbey chose. And often they were in our beda
ifoieus.

, I afterwards aicertained that my conjectures were

^neet, and that a secret communication waa kept

I in this manner between these two institutions, at

end towards Notre Dame atreet, at a oonaider-

denth under ground. I often afterwards met

I in the cellar, when sent there for eoala aM

'^■11

ijhIIi

^IihV^^^^H J: /Mi

'MHL^B||| '■

Kh^Hw *%t

mfLVKm 1

■W

i^HKB K^K^H W

ViK^HhI'' n

,|M|i

lot

MABU UWK.

othtr artielM, ta they had to put up and down thi
oommon oollar stain on their way.

My wearisome daily prayers and labours, my piio
of body and depression of mind, whioh were so mneli
increased by penances I have soffered, and thou
which I constantly feared, and the feeling of sbai&i,
remorse, and horror, which sometimes aroN,
brought me to a state whioh I cannot describe.

In the first place, my frame was enfeebled by the
nneasy postures I was required to keep for so long
a time during prayers. This alone, I ttiought, wu
sufficient to undermine my health and destroy mj
life. An hour and a half every morning I had to
•it on the floor of the community-room, with mj
feet under me, my body bent forward, and my heid
hanging on one side, in a posture expressive of greit
humility, it is true, but very fatiguing to keep fix
JfAoh an unreasonable length of time. Often I found
jfimpossible to avoid faUing asleep in this postun
which I could do without detection, by bending i
little lower than usuaL The signal to rise, or tin
noise made by the rising of the other nuns, thn
woke me, and I got up with the restunobsened.

Before we took the posture just described wehiJ
to kneel for a long time without bending the bodj,
keeping quite erect, with the exception of thekni
only, witti the hands together before the bn
This I found the most distressing attitude for
and never assumed it without fading a sharp
^ my chest, which I often thought would soon
me to my grave — ^that is, to the great common
eeptacle for the dead under the chapel. And
npright kneeling posture we were obliged to resi
M soon as we rose from the half-sitting postore

108

maniionadf fo thtl I oi nally felt myMlf eihAQitod
lad ntar to fainting bef ora the oonolasion of the
momiog lervioee.

I found the meditationi extremely tedioni, and
often did I aink into aleep, while we were all aeated
in lilenee on the floor. When required to tell my
meditationi, aa it waa thought to be of no mat im-
portanee what we aaid, I aometimea found I had no-
thing to tell but a dream, and told thai, whioh paM-
ed off Teiy well.

I Jane Ray appeared to be troubled atill more than
myself with wandering thoughta ; and when blamed
for ttiem, would rei^ly, *' I begin very well ; but di-
netly I begin to think of aome old friend of mine,
ind my thoughta go a wandering from one eountiy
to anoiher.''

Sometimea I eonf eaaed my f allinff aaleep ; anfl
loften the prieata have talked to me about the T
tileeping in the time of meditation. At laa^
Itbem propoaed to me to prick myaelf wi^ ^
Iwhieh ia often done, and ao rouae Wg0t'

ItiiM. ':M:/

Myeloae eonflnement in the ConTeUt,' and the

•nt of opportunitiea to breathe the open air, might

iT» proved more injurioua to me than they m,

I not been employed a part of my tune in miOM

tive laboura than thoae of aewing, d^e., to whicdi

: was ehiefly confined. I took part occaaionallly in

le of the heavy work, aa waahing, &6,

The eventa which I am now to relate oceuiied

rat five montha after my admiaaion into the Ooitt-

itaaanun; butlcannotfix the time with preefc*

ion, aa I knew not of any thing that took place in

leworldaboutthe same period. Theeifonmatanets

i^n

.-ifi'-i

ip'-II

104

MARIA MONK.

I clearly remember ; bat as I have elsewhere remark*
ed, we were not accustomed to keep any aecoontof
time.

Information was given to na one day, that ano.
ther noTice was to be admitted among as ; and we
were reqnired to remember and mention her often
in onr prayers, that she might have faithfnhieBsio
ttie service of her holy spouse. No information wii
given us concerning her beyond this fact; noti
word about her age, name, or nation. On all sunilv
occasions the same course was pursued, and all that
the nuns ever learnt concerning one another wai
what they might discover by being together, and
which usually amounted to UtUe or nothing.

When the day of her admission arrived, though 1 1
did not witness the ceremony in the chapel, it wu
a gratification to us all on one account, because we
were always released from labour, and enjoyed i{
great recreation day.

Our new sister, when she was introduced to thd
** holy*' society of us '* saints," proved to be young,
of about the middle size, and very good lodongforl
a Canadian : for I soon ascertained that she was omI
of my own countrywomen. The Canadian f enulsl
tra generally not handsome. I never learnt herl
name nor any thing of her history. 8he had cho
St. Martui for her nun name. She was admitted!
tiie morning, andappearedmelancholy all day. Tli
I observed was always the case ; and the rei
made by others, led me to believe that they, andi
they had seen, had felt sad and miserabte foralo

ger or shorter time. Even the Superior, as it ]
e recollected, confessed to me that she experieno
the same feelings when she was neeived. Wbi

MABIA MONK.

105

ad-time Arrived, she proceeded to the eharaber with
le rest of as* and was assigned a bed on the side
. the room opposite my own, and a little beyond.
[he nuns were all soon in bed, the nsnal silence en-
l, and I was making my customary mental pray-
r and composing myself to sleep, when I heard the
io8t pierdng and heart-rending shrieks proceed
m onr new comrade. Eyeiy nnn seemed to rise
J if by one impulse, for no one oould hear such
Dirnds, especially in such total silence, without be-
kg greatly excited. A general noise succeeded, for
ay voioes spoke together, uttering cries of sur-
se, compassion or fear. It was in yain for the
;h(-watch to expect silence; for once we for-
kroles and penances, and gave vent to our feelings,
she could do nothing but call for the Superior,
heard a man's voice mingled with the cries and
^eks of the nun. Father Quiblier, of the Semi-
j, I had felt confident, was in the Superior'a
^m at the time when we retired ; and several of
\ nima tdfterwards assured me that it was he. The
Brior soon made her appearance, and in a harsh
ler commanded silence. I heard her threaten
igher, and then say, ** Ton are no bettter than
[body else, and if yon do not obey, yon shall be
itothecellB.''

le young giri was taken into the Convent dnr-
ij abode there, under peculiar circumstances.
I acquainted with the whole afiiair, as I was em-
' to act a part in it.

long the novices was a youns lady« of about

tteen, the daughter of an old rioh Canadiaii.

1 been remarkable for nothin^f that I knoir ofi

the liveliness of her disposition. Tlif (N|-

<tVci

\i RIH

1 IH

1 Wm

1 III

1 IIBIIIII'iul

U^H^HI IH|fnllJ|Hll||H

1 H^^hI lwl!liirilllwBi
HHH III nfl IBHJBB ;

n^B^H llllllli'' IIH^H

Mill

HHHlll 11''' hH
: Mil 11

M|| H

i Ij^^HI l||l II I I^HI

106

MABIA HOMK.

perior onee expressed to ns a wish to haye her tiki
fhe veil, though the girl herself had neyer tny n^
intention that I know of* Why the Snperior wishej
to receive her I could only conjecture. One reason
might have been, that she expected to recei?ei
considerable smn f^om her father. She was, honk
ever, strongly desirous of having the girl in onr
commnnity, and one day said — **Let ns taJceherii
by a trick, and tell the old man she felt too hunlili
to take the veil in public."

Our plans then being laid, the unsuspecting
was induced by us, in sport, as we told her
made her believe, to put on such a splendid robe
I had worn on my admission, and to pass
some of the ceremonies of taking the veO.
this she was seriously informed, that she was
sidered as having entered the Convent in
and must henceforth buxy herself to the world,
she would never be allowed to leave it We
her on ft nun's dress, though she wept, and
and expressed the greatest repugnance. The
perior threatened and promised, and flattered
turns, until the poor girl had to submit ; bn
appearance long showed that she was a nnn
by compulsion.

In obedience to the directions of the Snpi
exerted ourselves to make her contented, es]
when she was first received, when we gotroi
and told her we had felt so for a time, bnt
since become acquainted with the happinan
nun's life, were perfectly content, and would
be willing to leave the Convent. An en
seemed to be made in her favour, in one v
for I believe no criminal attempt was made

MABU MONK.

107

ker, until she had been for some time an inmate of
16 Doimeiy.

Soon after her reception, or rather her forcible
jtiy into tiie Convent, her father called to make
iqniries aboat his daughter. The Superior first
noke with him herself, and then called ua to repeat
ler plausible story, which I did with accuracy. If
[bad wifdied to say any thing else, I never should
ire dared.

We told the foolish old man, that his daughter,
lom we ill affectionately loved, had long desired
I become a nun, but had been too humble to wish
appear before spectators, and had, at her own
iie, been favoured with a private admission into
eommunity .
[Tbebenefit conferred upon himself and his family,
ibis act of self-consecration, I reminded him,
be truly great and valuable ; as eveiy family
^0 famishes a priest, or a nun, is justly looked
on as receiving the peculiar favour of heaven on
aecount The old Canadian, firmly believing
word I was forced to tell him, took the event
i great blessing, and expressed the greatest readi-
to pay more than ttie customary fee to the
nyent. After the interview, he withdrew, pro«
ig soon to return, and pay a handsome sum to
[Convent, which he performed with all despatch
ibe greatest cheerfulness. The poor girl never
~ that her father had taken the trouble to call
[see her, much less did she know any thing of
limposition passed upon him. She remained in
[Ooiivent when I left it.

ii youngest girl who ever took the veil of our
rbood, was only fourteen years of age, and eon-

Ill

Ui!:i

108

MARIA MONK.

sidered Tery pious. She lived bat a short time, i
was told that she was ill-treated by the priests, uj
belieyed her death was in conseqnence*

CHAPTEB XIV.

Inflneneing NoTioes^Diffionlty of oonyindng persons from tki I
Uoitod States— Tale of the Bishop iu the City —The Biihojl
in the Gonvent— The Prisoners in the Cells— Praotieelf
Singing— Narratives— Jane Bay's Hymns— The Soperioi'il
best Trick.

It was considered a great duty to exert onnel?
to influence noTioes in f ayonr of tiie Roman Gatho
religion ; and different nuns were, at different tin
charged to do what they codM, by convemtio
to make favonrable impressions on the minds i
some, who were, particiUarly indicated tons by I
Superior. I often heard it remarked, that those wli
were influenced with the greatest difficnl^,
young ladies from the United States ; andoni
of those, great exertions were made.

Cases in which citizens of the States were siidl
haye been conyerted to the Roman Catholic
were sometimes spoken of, and always as if
were considered highly important.

The Bishop, as we were told, was in the
square, on the day of an execution, when, ashei
a stranger looked at him in some peculiar mi
which made him confidently belieye God int
to haye him conyerted by his means. Wbesj
went home he wrote a letter for him, and the
day he found him again in the same place, andf
him the letter, which led to his becoming a T
Catholic. This man, it was added, proved to I
eitisen of the States.

If ABIA M OHK.

109

The Bishopt m I haye T^marked, was not very
ignifled on aU ooeanona, and aometimes acted in
ach a manner as would not have appeared well in

onblio.
One day I saw bim preparing for mass ; and be-
tase he had some difficulty in getting on his robesi
lowed evident signs of anger. One of the nnns re-
rked: " The Bishop is going to perform a pas-
I mass." Some of the others exclaimed ; " Are
ron not ashamed to speak thus of my lord?'' And
be was rewarded with a penance.
But it might be hoped that the Bishop would be
I from the crimes of which I have declared so
ly priests to have been guilty. I am far from
ntertaining such charitable opinions of him ; and
fhad good reasons, after a time.
[I was often required to sleep on a sofk, in the
of ttie present Superior, as I may have already
itionedit

[One nigbt, not long after I was first introduced

for that purpose, and within the first twelve

aihs of my wearing the veil, haying retired as

1, at about half past nine, not long after we had

linto bed, the alarm-bell from without, which

igsover the Superior's bed was rung. She told me

who was there ; and going down, I heard the

given, which I have before mentioned, a

kind of hissing sound made through the

I answered with a low ** Hum — ^hum ;" and

opened the door. It was Bishop Lartique, the

it Bishop of Montreal. He said to me, ** Are

i i Novice or a Received f " meaning a Received

I answered, a ** Received."
le ttien requested me to conduct him to the Sn-

'iff

IBM

110

lUBIA MOKK

If*.

Mfiof '• room, wbieh I did. He went to the bed,
drew the enrtains behind him, end I lay downagiji
upon the sofa, until morning, when the Superior
called me, at an early hour, abont daylight, ud
directed me to show mm the door, to which I
ducted him, and he took his departure.

I continued to Tidt the cellar frequently, to cany i
np e^f or the fires, without anything more thtB
a geUMal impression that there were two nans 8001^
where impnsoned in it. One day, while there «
my usual errand, I saw a nun standing on the rigU
of the cellar, in front of one of the cell doors I y
before observed ) she was apparently engaged will
something withUi. This attracted my attentioi
The door appeared to dose in a small recess, dj
was fastened with a stout iron bolt on the
the end of which was secured by being let intoij
hole in the stonework which formed the posts, m
door, which was of wood, was sunk a few inches k\
yond the stonework, which rose and formed an 1
orerhead. AboTe the bolt was a small wind
supplied with a fine grating, which swung open,!
imiul bolt having been removed.from it, on the (
side. The nun I had observed seemed to be vli
pering with some person within, tiirough the
window: but I hastened to get my coal, and
the cellar, presuming that was the prison. Hifhsj
visited ttie place again, being alone, I ventured I
the spot, determined to learn the truth, presn '
that ttie imprisoned nuns, of whom the Superior)
toU me on my admission, were confined then j
•poke at the vnndow where I had seen the nnn i
ing, and heard a voice reply in a whisper. Th^i
tue was so small, and the phuse so dark, that I(

MABU MONK.

Ill

J nobody ; bnt I learnt thftt % poor wnteh wm «oii-
jed there • prisoner. I feared that I might be
iseoTered, and after a few words, which I thought
tnld do no haim, I withdrew.
My enriosity was now alive to learn eyerything I
)iild about so mysterious a subject. I made a few
iqniries of St. Xavier, who only inf onned me that
ley were punished for refusing to obey the ^npe-
lor, Bishop, and Priests. I afterwards foii^ that
le other nuns were acquainted with tbufiisl I had
diseovered. Allleonld learn, however, was
It the prisoner in the cell whom I had just spo-
with, and another in the cell just beyond, had
confined there several years without having
I taken out ; but their names, connexions, often-
and everything else relating to them, I could
rer leun, and' am still as ignorant of as ever.
le conjectured that they had refused to com-
with some of the rules of the Convent or re-
ions of the Superior; others, that they were
whose property was desired for the Con-
st, and who would not consent to sign deeds of
Some of the nuns informed me, that the seve-
i(A their sufferings arose from fear of supema-
J beings.

often spoke with one of them in passing near

> cells, when on errands in the cellfur, but never

to stop long, or to press my enquiries very

Besides, I found her reserved, and little

to converse freely, • thing I eould not

at when I considered her situation, and tho

of persons around her. She spoke like M

in feeble health, and of broken spirits. I

ly saw other nuns speaking to tboiif

Or I

• 'K-t',.:

•-',Vc

lis

MARIA MONK

partieiilarly ai meal timei, when thej were ngg.
larly farniehed with food, which was snch as wi
onneWes ate.

Their eells were oocasionally eleaned, and then
the doom were opened. I neyer looked into them,
but was informed that the ground was their oolf
floor. I prestimed that they were fnmighed with
straw to he npon, as I always saw a quantity of oU
straw scattered abont that part of the cellar, aftv
the cells had been cleaned. I once inquired of one
of them whether they conld conyerse together, uj
•he replied that they conld, through a smtdl op»
ing between their cells, which I could not see.

I once inquired of the one I spoke with in pi«>
ing, whether she wanted anything, and she replied
** Tell Jane Bay I want to see her a moment if liii
can slip away.*' When I went up I took an oppii>
tnniij to deliver my message to Jane, who coDeat>
ed with me a signal to be used in future, in eanij
similar request should be made through me. TUil
was a sly wink at her with one eye accompi
with a slight toss of the head. She then song
omiortnnity to visit the cellar, and was soon abb
hold an interview with the poor prisoners,
out being noticed by any one but myself. I
wards learnt that mad Jane Bay was not seioad
she could feel for those miserable beings, and
through measures for their comfort She would
ten yisit them with sympathizing words, andwl
necessary, conceal put of her f (^ while at
and secretly convey it into their dungeons,
tunes we would combine for such an object;
have repeatedly aided her in thus obtaining a
supply of food than they had been able to ol
from others.

MABIA MONK.

113

I freqaenfly thought of the two nmiB confined in
[the ceust *&« oeeMionaUy heard something said
Isboat thenii hnt TOiy little. Wheneyer I visited the
Bllar, snd thought it Safe, I went np to the first of
lem sad spoke • word or two, and nsoslly got
16 hiief reply, without ascertaining that any par-
_ rehange took place with either of them. The
le with whom alone I oyer conyersed, spoke English
feeilywell, and French I thought as well. I
ipposed she must haye been well edncatod, for I
}Qld not tell which was her natiye langnage. I
jembor that she frequently used these words
rhen I wished to say more to her, and which alone
lowed fliat she was constantly afraid of punish-
it,** Oh, there's somebody coming— do gp away !"
[hife been told that the odier prisoner a&o ooka^
Df^iih. ?■

I It was impossible for me to form any certain opin-
abont flie size or apj^earance of those two
lUe creatures, for their cells were perfectly
and I neyer caught the slightest glimpse eyen
I fhdr ftices. It is probable they were women not
the middle sice, and my reason for this pre-
iption is the following: I was sometimes ap-
M to lay out the clean clothes for all the nuns
it C^nyent on Saturday eyening, and was always
Bt6d%> lay by two suits for the prisoners. Par-
kr ciders were aiyen to select the largest siaed
le&ts for seyeru tall nuns ; but nothing of the
Iwis eVer said in relation to the clothes for those
to cells.

[hid not been long a yelled nun, before I re-
id of the Superior permission to confess to the
It Bon Pasteur,** (Holy Good Shepherd) that

,.^.r:^

MARIA MONE.

if, fhe mysteiiont tnd nameless nmi whom I bad
heard of while a noTiee. I knew of sevenl otbnt
who had eonf essed to her at different times, sod ^
aome who had sent tiieir clothes to be toaohed b;
her when they were dek ; and I felt a desire to qb.
bnrden my heart of certain things, which I wu
loath to acknowledge to the Snpenor, or any of tin
priests.

^ The Superior made me wait a little until sht
conld ascertain whethenibe ** Saint Bon Pasteur"
was ready to admit me ; and, after a time, retarned
and told me to enter the old nuns' room. Tbit
apartment has twelye beds vranged like theberthi
of a ship by threes ; and as each is broad enoagi
to receiTC two persons, twenty-f onr may be lodgti |
there* which was about the number of old nuns a i
the Convent during most of my stay in it. Nar
an opposite comer of the appartment was a liiffe
glass case, with no appearance of a door, or other
opening, in any part of it; and in that case stoodthil
venerable nun, m the dress of the commumty,!"'
her thick veil spread over her face, so as to cone
it entirely. She was standing, for the place didi
allow room for sitting, and moved a little, which i
the only sign of life, as she did not speak. I :
upon my knees before, her and began to conffl
some of my imperfections, which lay hea^ api
my mind, imploring her aid and intercession, thkj
might be delivered from them. She appearr"'
Hston to me with patience, but still never letu
ft word in reply. I became much affected as I «(i
on ; at length began to weep bitterly ; and, wba|
withdrew, was in tears. It seemed to me that i
heart was remarkably relieved after this exc

MAMA MOMS.

115

[•Bd aU iht nqiiMtt, I bad made, I fonnd, «■ I be-
i«vad, ftiieilj AilfiUed. I often, afterwards, Tiiited
old noni' voom fox the same purpose, and with

reiolts; so that my belief in the sanotityof

_. nameless nun, and my regard for her interoes-
ion, were uiboonded.

What is remarkable, thongh I repeatedly was sent
ito that room to dost it,^ or to pat it in order, I re-
larked, tiiat the glass oas9 was Tacant and no sigmi
rere to be foond, either of -tlpi nun, or of the wj^
U wMoh she had left it! so that a solemn eoneln-
ion rested npon mr oM* ttuit she had gone on one
her frequent Tints to >M(yeii,
Aprieat would sometimes oome in the day time to
BMh na to sing, and this Was done with some.parade
r stir, as if it were considered, or meant to be eon-
^dered, as a thing of importaae^n
The inatmciions, howoTor, were entirely repeti-
vo» of the wotds and tones, nothing being tanght
en of the first principles of the soienoe. It appear-
to me, that althonni hymns alone were song, the
penile was chiefly designed for our amnaement, to
ise oor apirits a Uttle, which were apt to become
^pressed. Mad Jane Ray certainly nsnally treated
I whole thing as a matter of sport, and often ex-
Ittioae of US who understood English, to a great
of mirth. She had a yery fine Toioe, ^ddeh
I M powerfal as generally to be heard above the
Sometimes she would be silent when the other
began ; and the Snperior would often call out,
fina Bay, you don't sing." She always had some
luig eieuse ready, and commonly appeared un-
" gtoioiAtherest.
Br being urged or commanded by the Superiori

116

HABIA MOMK.

sht would thin strike lome Engliih loiig, or no.
ixM parody, whieh wm nnderM ton timet monii.
dienlone by the ignoranoe of the lady Saperioraad
the majority of the nuns. I camiot help laaghing
now when I remember how the oaed to itand liS
perfect oomposure, and idng,

** I wish I was married and nothing to rae,
With plenty of money and nothing to do/'

* Jane Bay, yon don't aing right," the Stipoioi
wonld exclaim." ** Ob,'* abe wonld reply with ^
feet eoolneii, that ia the Engliah for

** Seignenr Dien de demence,
Recoia ce grand pechenr I "

and, as anna by her, « peraon ignorant of the Ian.
gnage wonla natorally be imposed npon. It wm
extremely difficult for me to conceal my laashtor.
I have always had greater exertion to make u n. |
pressing it tiian moat other persons ; and mad Jim |
Itay ofUn i^k adyantage of this.

Saturday eyening nsoally brought with it mock I
unpleasant work for some of us. We reeeiyed S»
crament eyery Sunday ; and in preparation for U
on Saturday eyening, we asked pardon of the Sop^l
rior, and of eaeh ottier, "for the scandal we yl
caused them since we last reeeiyed the Sacrament,']
and then asked the Superior's permission to reednil
on the following day. She enquired of each ni
who necessarily asked her penmssion, wheiheri
naming her aa Saint somebody, had concealed i
sin that should hinder her reedying it ; and if I
answer was in the negatiye, she granted her pe
don.

MAXUl If OMK.

117

On Sttiircbgri w« were eateebliad by Ajpriesi, b»-
iiur iiiembled 1b a eotiflnmity-sooni. ue eat on
th« right of the door, in « ohaur. He often told ua
ilories, and freqaentijr enlarged on the daty of en-
ttfling nofieei into the nunnery. ** Do yon not feel
hippy*" ^® wonld lay, ** now that yon are safely out
of the world, and iure of hearen f But remember
how many poor people are yet in the world. Every
I noriee you influence to take the Uack toU, will add
to yonr honour in heaTon. TeU them how happy

joa iie."

The Superior played one tiiek while I wai in the
Oonvent, which always passed for one of the most
ladmiraUe she ever carried into execution. We
Iwere pretty good judges in a case of this kind ; for,
I may be presumed, we were rendered familiar with
le trts of deception under so accomplished a
loher*

There was an ornament on hand in the Nunnery,

^f ID extraordinary kind, which was prised at ten

oubcIb; but it had been made and exposed to view

long, that it became damaged and quHa unsale-

le. We were one day visited by an old priest

m the countiy, who was evidently somewhatin-

xieated ; and as he withdrew to go to his lodgings

the Seminary, where the country priests often

17, the Superior conceived a plan for disposing

{he old ornament **Gome,*' said she, **we

send it to the old priest, and swear he has

i^tit''

[We all approved of the ingenious device, for it

idenlly might be classed among the pious frauds

I had so omn had recommended to us, boQi by

and example; and the ornament was seiil

' 1.

r ■ )

118

MABIA MOMK.

io him th« 110x1 morning, as bit propert j when pii j
for. He soon o«me into the Gonvent, and expressed
the greatest surprise that he had been charged with
purchasing snob a thing, for which he had no need
'^ and no desire.

The Saperior heard his declaration with patience,
bat politely insisted that it was a fair bargain ; and
we Ihen snrronnded the old priest, with the strongest
assertions that sach was the fact, and that nobodj
wonld baye thought of his purchasing it unless be
bad expressly engaged to take it. The poor old
man was entirely put down. He was certun of the
truth ; but what could he do to resist or cUsproyei
direct falsehood pronounced by the Superior of i
Convent, and sworn to by all her holy nuns? He
finally expressed his conviction that we wererij
and was compelled to pay his money.

CHAPTER XV.

Vteqjuntj of th« Prieits* Visits to the Nnnnny-Tbdrl
Flreedom and CrimM— DifBonlty of learning their Nimei-
Their Holy Betnat— OlgeotionB in our minds— Meani oiii |
to eounteract Gonscienee— Ingenions Argnmenti.

Some of the priests from the Seminary were hi
the Nunnery every day and night, and often sen-
ral at a time. I have seen nearly aU of them A
different times, though there are about one hnndieil
and iLf ty in the district of Montreal. There was t|
difference in their conduct ; though I believe m
one of them was guilty of licentiousness; while i
one did I ever see who maintained a charactering
way becoming the profession of a priest
were gross and degraded in a degree which lev i
my leaden can ever have imagined ; andl ' '

MABIA MONK.

119

be onwilliiig to offend the eye, and eornipt tlie bearl
of any one, by an aeeonnt of their words and ae*
tions. Few imaginations can conceive deeds so
abominable as they practised, and often reqnired
of some of the poor women, nuder the fear of se-
vere pnnishments, and eyen of death. I do not
hesitate to say with the strongest confidence, that
[altbongh some of the nnns became lost to every
! sentiment of virtae and honour, especially one
I of the Congregational Nunnery whom I have before
mentioned. Sunt Patrick, the greater part of them
loaQied tiie practices to which they were compelled
to submit, by their Snperior and priests, who kept
[them onder so dreadfu a bondage.

Some of the priests whom I saw I never knew by
[name, and tiie names of others I did not learn for a
time, and at last learnt only by accident.

They were always called '* Mon Pere," (my father)
bat sometimes when they had purchased sometl|^g
|m the ornament-room, they would give their reid
lameSfWithdirectionswhereitshouldbesent. Many
lames, thus learnt, and in other ways, were whis-
bered about from nun to nun, and became pretty gen-
nJly known. Several of the priestaiome of us had
Ben before we entered the Convent.
Many things of which I speak, from the nature of
^e ease, must necessarily rest chiefly upon my own
rord, until further evidence can be obtained; but
leie are some fkets for which I can appeal to the
lowledge of others. It is commonly known in
[ontied that some of the priests occasionally with-
raw from their customs]^ emjployments, and are
lot to be seen for some time ; it being understood
lit they have retired for religions stttdy, medita-

130

MABIA MONK

tion, and devotion, for the improTement o! their
hearUi. SometimeB they are thai withdrawn from
the world for weeks ; but there is no fixed period.

This was a fact I knew before I took the veil ; for
it is a frequent subject of remark, that snch or neb
a Father is on a ** holy retreat.'' This is a teno
which conveys the idea of a religions sedasion iroin
the world, for sacred purposes. On the re-appeir<
ance of a priest after such a period, in the chmeh
or the streets, it is natural to feel a peculiar impng.
sion of his devout eharaoter — an impression yeij
diflferent from that conveyed to the mind of one who
knows matters as they really are. Suspicions have
been indulged by some in Canada on this snbjeet,
and facts are known by at least a few. I am able to
speak from personal kaowledge ; for I have beeni
nun of SoBur Bourgeoise.

The priests are liable, by their dissolute habits,
to occasional attacks of diseiase, which render it nec-
essary, or al least prudent, to submit to medical
treatment.

In the Black Nunnery they find private acoommo-
dation, for they are free to enter one of the private
hospitals whenever they please ; which is a looo
set apart on purpose for the accommodation of thi
priests, and is called a retreat-room. But an ex-
cuse is necessary to blind the publio, .'^ind this thej
flind in the pretence they make of being in a " Holj
Betreat." Many such cases have I known; and!
can mention the names of priests who have been
confined in this Holy Betreat. They are very can-
fully attended by the Superior and old nuns, and
Uieir diet consists mostly of vegetable soups, Ae^
with but little meat, and that f^sh. I have sen

lUBIA MONK^

121

[iDinstrameiitol surgevy lying apon the table in
Uiat holy room, whidi is used omy for particiilar

Father Tombean, a Boman priest, was on one of
Ihis holy retreats about the time when I left the
iKnimery There are sometimes a number confined
lere at the same time. The victimB of these priests
«qiiently share the same fate.
I have often refleoted how greivonsly^ I had been
leeeived in my opinions of a nnn's condition f — ^AU
^e holiness of their lives, I now saw was merely
tended. The appearance of sanctity and heaven-
r-mindedness which they had shown among us no-
pees, I fouid was only a disguise to conceal snob
aetiees as wonld not be tolerated in any decent so-
etjm the world; and as for joy and peace like
it of hesTcn, wldeh I had expected to find among
^em, I learnt too well that they did not exist there.
The o^y way in which snch thoughts were conn-
ected, was by the constant instrnctions giyen ns
^e Superior and priests, to regard every donbt
I a mortal sin. Other faults we might have, as we
)told over and over again, which though worthy
ices, were far less sinful than these. For a
, to donbt that she was doing her duty in fulfil-
; her vows and oaths, was a heinous offence, and
I wae exhorted always to suppress our doubts, to
fees ihem without reserve, and cheerfully submit
eveire penances on account of them, as the only
of mortif^ying our evil dispositions, and re-
[ the temptations of the devu. Thus we leaml
1^ degree to resist our minds and con-
ned, when we felt the rising of a question about
jdnty of doing anything required of us*

■ I'i'

122

BIARU MOMK.

To enfoioe this npon us, thev employed Tarioui
meaiiB. Some of the most striking stories told u
at catechism by the priests, were designed for thia
end. One of these I will repeat '* One day/' as i
priest assured as, who was hearing as say the cat-
echism on Satunclay afternoon, ** as one Monsieur
*****, a well known citizen of Montreal, wai
walking near the cathedral, he saw Satan giving
orders to innamerable evil spirits who were assem-
bled aroand him. Being afraid of being seen, and yet
wishing to observe what was done, he hid himself
where he ooald observe all that passed. Satan des*
patched his devils to different parts of the city, with
directions to do their best for mm ; and they reton-
ed in a short time, bringing in reports of their sne*
cess in leading persons of different classes to
commission of various sins, which they thonj^
woald be agreeable to their master. Satan, howera I
expressed ms dissatisfaction, and ordered them ootj
again ; but just th^ a spirit from the Black
nery came, who had not been seen before, and stattjj
that he had been trying for seven years to persuadtl
one of the nuns to doubt, and had just succeeded.!
Satan received the intelligence with the hij
pleasure ; and turning to the spirits aroand
said : * Yoa have not half done your work,— he 1
done much more than all of you.' "

In spite, however, of our instructions and m
ings, our feigrs and penances, such doubts woaldi
trude ; and I have often indulged them for a
and at length, yielding to the belief that I was ^
in giving place to them, would confess them,
undergo with cheerfulness such new penances sj
was loaded with. Others too would occasion

MARIA MONK.

128

LntertaintndpiiTitoly express snoh doubts; though
we all bad been most solemnly warned by the emel
Unrder of Saint Frances. Oecasionally some of the
ions wonld go farther, and resist the restraints of
vanishments imposed upon them ; and it was not
^leommon to hear screams, sometimes of a most
tiercing and terrific kind, from nans saffering under
iscipline.

Some of my readers may feel disposed to exclaim

imst me, for believing things which will strike

jem as so monstrous and abominable. To such, I

ronld say, without pretending to justify myself ; —

^on know little of the position in which I was pla-

i; in the first place, ignorant of any other reli-

^008 doctrines, and in the second, met at every mo-

lent by some ingenious argument, and the exam-

le of a large community, who received all the in-

letions of the priests as of undoubted truth, and

Btised upon them. Of the variety and specious-

of the arguments used, you cannot have any

Bt idea. They were often so ready with replies,

pies, anecdotes, and authorities, to eiiorce

^eir doctrines, that it seemed to me as if they could

er have learnt it all from books, but must have

Bn taught by wicked spirits. Indeed, when I re*

etnpon their conversations, I am astonished at

Bir art and address, and find it difficult to account

their subtlety and success in influencing my

id, and persuading me to anything they pleased.

Iieems to me that hardly anybody would be safe

[their hands. If you were to go to confession

ee, I believe you would feel very different from

It yon do now. They have such a way of avoid-

I one thing and speaking of another, of affirming

'ill'

msmm

l^BMliiil

SB^^EKmWi

■wM^^^mSmmS

' iBH^^^Hl^K 1

llHi

liffi

wM ',;

194

■ABU Mom.

this, and donbtbig and disputing lliil, of (^lu^
Ruthoritiei, fnd speaking of wonders and mindgg
leoantlj p«tfonned, in oonfinnation of what ibn
teaeh, af familiarly known to persons whom they
eallbytiame, and whom they pretend to offers
witnesses, though they never givfryoaanopportai%
to speak with them, — ^these, and many other meani,
they nse in snoh a way, that they dways blinded
m^ mind, and, I shoidd think, would blind the
minds of others.

CHAPTER XVI.

Tnatment of yoimg taiiiuiti In the OonTent— Talking In 81m ;
— AmiiMmtnta— OenmoniM At the pnbllo Intemantcf
deoeaied Nmn^Sodden diiftppearuioe of the Old Soptikr
— IntrodaeUon of the new one— Sapentltion^AIuiBofil
nun— DUBeolty of Oommnnieation with other Nudi.

It will be recollected, that I was informed ima^j
diately after receiving the veil, that infants w6noi>|
easionally murdered in the Convent. I was one%j
in the nnns' private sick room, when I had an of^j
portonity unsought for, of witnessing deeds off
a nature. It was, perhaps, a month after the r
of St. Frances. Two little twin babes, the el
of St. Catherine, were brought to a priest, whoi
in tiie room, for baptism. I was present whilet
ceremony was performed, with the Superior andt
oral of the old nuns, whose names I never
they hmf called Ma tant (Aunt.)

The pnests took turns in attending to confe
and catechism in the Convent, usually three mo
at a time, though sometimes longer periods,
priest then on duty was Father Larkin. He iij
good-looking EutQ^^^mt and has a brother whoi

KABU MOirS.

professor in fhe College. H^lkf||at dl upon the
^eftdi of the infuite, as ie the M g awA before bep-
[gm. When he had baptised dmhildren, they
jeie taken, one after another, b^Rpne of the old
ions, in the presence of ns alL She pressed her
id apon the month and nose of the first so tight
^itcoold not breathe, and in a few minntes, when
It hind was removed, it was dead. She then took
ie other, and treated it in the same way. No sonnd
ras heard, and both the children were corpses.
e greatest indifference was shown by all present
luring this operation ; for all, as I well knew, were
ing aecnstomed to snch scenes. The little bodies
ere then taken into the cellar, thrown into the pit
ha? e mentioned, and covered with a qnantity of

me.

I afterwards saw a new-bom infant treated in the

le manner, in the same place ; bnt the actors in

acene I choose not to name, nor the cironm-

lees, as eyery thing connected with it is of a pe-

iarly trying and painfolnatnre tomy ownfeelings.

[These were the only instances of infanticide I

leased ; and it seemed to be merely owing to

ndent that I was then present . So far as I Imow

were no pains taken to preserve secrecy on

isabject ; that is, I saw no attempt made to keep

inmate of the Convent in ignorance of the

et the children. On tiie contrary, others

I told, as well as myself, on their first admission

' nims, that all infants bom in the place

I baptised and killed, without loss of time ! and

Ibeen called to witness the mnrder of the three

t mentioned, only becanse I happened to be in

licom at the time.

116

KABIA MOnX*

That othen were lolled in the same manner, dor.
ing my stay iu fhe numery, I am well assured.

How many there were I cannot tell, and hvm
taken no aceonnt of those I heard of, I cannot
speak with precision ; I helieve, however, thit i
learnt through nans, that at least eighteen or twenty
infants were smothered, and secreUy buried intbi
cellar, while I was a nun.

One of the effects of the weariness of our bodiei
and minds, was onr proneness to talk in cor sleep,
It was both Indicrons and painful to hear the mi
repeat their prayers in the coarse of the night, a
they freqaently did in their dreams. Beqnind ti
keep onr minds continaally on the stretch, both h
watching oar eondact, in remembering the nisi
and oar prayers, ander the fear of the consequents |
of any neglect, when we closed oar eyes in
we often went oyer again the scenes of the day;]
and it was no ancommon thing for me to hear anni
repeat one or two of her long exercises in tibe ddl
of the night. Sometimes by the time she had m
ished, another, in a different part of the nxaj
wonld happen to take a similar tarn, and comme
a similar recitation; and I have known oases i
which several sach anconscioas exercises were]
formed, all within an hoar or two.

We had now and then a recreation day,
were relieved from oar oastomary labonr, and!
all prayers except those for morning and even
and the short ones said at every striking o! the(
The greater part of oar time was then occupied m|
different games, particularly backganmionand^ '
and in sach conversation as did not relate toi
past lives, and the oatside of the Convent.

fUXUL MOMK.

Imei , however, oar sports would be intenivj^lsa on
noh days by the entrance of one of the pii<^ts,
fho would eome in and propose that his fete, the
iday of his patron saint, should be kept by ** the
lints/' We saints!

Several nuns died at different times while I was

the Convent; how many, I cannot say, bat there

a considerable nnmber. I might rather say

ly in proportion to the nnmber in the nnnnery*

le proportion of deaths I am sare was very large.

lere were always some in the nans' sick-room,

Id several interments took place in the chapel.

[when a Black Nan is dead, the corpse is dressed

[if living, and placed in the chapel in ft sitting

itore, within &e railing ronnd the altar, with a

ok in the hand as if reading. Persons are then

Biy admitted from the street, and some of them

land pray before it. No particular notoriety

pyen, I believe, to this exhibition ont of the

Bvent, bat snch a ease nsaally excites some at-

ion*

l!he living nans are required to say prayers for

[deliveiy of their deceased sister from purgatory,

informed, as in all other such cases, that if

[is not there, uid has no need of oar interces-

f, onr prayers are in no danger of being thrown

^, as &ey will be set down to the account of

of our deceased friends, or at least to that

^e souls which have no acquaintances to pray

lem.

I was customary for us occasionally to kneel be-

|a dead nun thus seated in the chapel, and I

often performed that task. It was always

1, for the ghastly countenance being seen

mm It

118

MASU MOinL

wh6n«Ter I nised my ayei, and the feeling thiltbi
poeitioii and dreu were entirelj opposed to 6?m
idea of propriety ^ >v^ * Mie, uways ouuU m
melaneholy.

The Superior sometimes left the Convent, inj
was absent for an honr, or several honrs at • tine,
bat we nerer knew of it nntil she had returned, ud
were not informed where she had been. I one dij
had reason to presume that she had reeenUy ndd
• visit to ihe priests* farm, though I hadDotdinei
evidence that such was the fact. The priests'lui
is a fine tract of land belonging to the Seminiij,i
little distance from the dfy, near the Lachinentj,
with a large old-fashioned edifice upon it I ]ub>
pened to m in the Superior's room on the dayi
laded to, when she made some remark on the p]aii>
nesi and poverty of her furniture. I replied tU
•he was not proud, and could not be dissatisfledfli
that account : she answered,-—** No : but if I wm^j
how much superior is the furniture |t the prii
farm ; tiie poorest room there, , is li&miihea
than the htt'6 of mine." 4f *

I was one day mending the fire in the Sv
loom, when a priest was conversing with her
Bcaieiiiy of money ; and I heard hm say tint
little money was received by the priests for pn]
but that the principal part came with penancei
absolutions.

One of the most remarkable and unieooonl
things tiiat happened in the Convent, was ihe
appearance of tiie old Superior. She hadpeif
ed her customary part during the day, ud
acted and appeared fust as usuid. She had shomi
symptoms of ill health, met with no partieolir '

lUBIA MOITK.

129

fioolty in eondnoting badnem, and no agitation,
laiixiety* or gloom hMbeon notioed in her oondnot.
[we had no reason to snppoao that during that day
be had expected anythmg partionlar to oocor, any
loie than the reat of ns. After the close of our
itomaiy laboura and evening lectures, she dis-
led ns to retire to bed, exactly in her usual
ler. The next morning the bell rang, we
.Jig from our beds, hurried on our clothes as
iBul, and proceeded to the eommunity-room in
'}abl6line, to commence the morning exercises,
jere, to our surprise, we found Bishop Lartique ;
(at the Superior was no where to be seen. The
bishop soon addressed ns, instead of her, and in-
srmea us, that a lady near him, whom he present-
, to ns, was now the Superior of the Convent, and
Djoined upon ns the same respect and obedience
fbieh we paid to her predecessor.
The lady he introduced to us was one of our old-
kinnns. Saint Pu***, a very large, fleshy woman,
lib swelled limbs, which rendered her very slow
I walking, and often gave her great distress. Not
[wovd was dropped from which we could conjec-
ibe cause of this change, nor of the fate of the
Superior. I took the first opportunity to enquire
lone of the nuns, whom I dared to talk to, what
[become of her; but I found them as ignorant
myself, though suspicious that she had been
lered by order of the Bishop. Never did I
any light on her mysterious disappearance,
confident, however, ti^at if the Bishop wished
it lid of her privately, and by foul means, he
i mple opportunities and power at his command.
^9 Ray^ as usual, could not allow such an oocurr-

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180

MABIA MONK.

enoe to pais by withont intimating her own bus.
pioions more plainly than any other of the muu
would have dared to do. She spoke out one day in
the oommnnity-room, and said, **rm going to hive
a hnntin the cellar for my old Superior."

** Hash, Jane Bay !" exclaimed some of the oqiu
•• you'll be punished." '

**My mother used to tell me,'* replied Jane,
«« never to be afraid of the face of man."

It cannot be thought strange that we were 8npe^
•titious. Some were more easily terrified thiui
others by unaccountable sights and sounds ; but ill
of us beueyed in the power and occasional appev-
ance of spirits, and were ready to leok for tliem it
almost any time. I have seen several instauces ol
alarm caused by such superstition, and have exper<
ienced it myself more than once* I was one dij
sitting mending aprons, beside one 1 1 the old dqiu,
in the community-room, while the litanies weren*
posting : •■ I was very easy to laugh. Saint Ignau
or Agnes, came in, walked up to her with modf
agitation, and began to whisper in her ear. She nsntl'
ly talked but little, and that made me more carionitii
Imow what was the matter. I overheard
the old nun, in much alarm, that in the cellar froij
which she had just returned, she had heard
most dreadful groans that ever came from onyh
being. This was enough to give me nneasines
I could not account for the appearance of an ei
spirit in any part of the Convent, for I had
assured that Uie only one ever known there was
of the nun who had died with an uncoufessedfiBi
and that others were kept at a distance by
water that was rather profusely used in diffi

MABIA MONK.

131

parts of the nunnery. Still, I presanied that the
loaiidf heard hj Saint Iffnaee moit have proceeded
Ifrom some deTil* and I felt great dread at the thought
L| yisitlDg the cellar again. I determined to seek
irther information of the terrified nan, bat when
jjressed her on the aabject, at recreation- time,
the first opportanity I ooald find, she replied, that
was always trying to make her break silence, and
ralked ofiP to another group in the room, so that I
)ald obtain no satisfaction.
It is remarkable that in oar nunnery, we were
most entirely cut off from the means of knowing
ly thing even of each other. There were many
^nswhom I know nothing of to this day, after
lyinff been in the same rooms with then eyeiy day
id lugbt for four years. There was a nan, whom
apposed to be in the Convent) and whom I was
doas to loam something about from the time of
ky entrance as a novice ; but I never was able to
am any tiling concerning her, not even whether
[ewas in the nunnery or not, whether alive or dead.
tie was the daughter of a rich family, residing at
Dint anx Trembles, of whom I had heard my
other speak before I entered the Convent. The
le of her family I thiuk was Lafayette, and she
I thought to be from Europe. She was known ta
^?e taken the Black Veil, but as I was not acquaint-
1 with the Saint she had assumed, and I could not
ibe her in **the world,'* all my enquiries and
Tations proved entirely in vain.
', bad heard before my entrance into the Convent,
;one of the nuns had made her escape from it
ffing the last war, and once inquired about her
\i Saperior. She admitted that laoh was the

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182

MARIA MONK.

fact ; but I WAS never able to learn any particulan
concerning her name, origin, or manner of escape.

CHAPTER XVII.

Disappearanct of Nuns— SU Pierre— Gags— My temponn
Coufloement in a Cell— The Oholera Season— How to avoid
it— Oocnpations in Uio Convent during tlie Pestilenoe-
Ifanufacture of Wax Candles— The Election Riots-
Alarm among the Nuns— Preparation! for Defeuoe -^Fen*
aneei.

I am nnable to say how many nnns
whUe I was in the Convent. There were several.
One was a young lady called St. Pierre, I think,
but am not certain of her name. There were two
nuns by this name. I had known her as a novice
with me. She had been a novice about two yean
and a half before I became one. She was rather
large without being tall, and had rather dark hair
and eyes. She disappeared unaccountably, and no-
thing was said of her except what I heard in whii*
pers from a few of the nuns, as we found momenli
when we could speak unobserved.

Some told me they thought she must have left the
Convent; and I might have supposed so, hadlnoi
some time afterwards found some of her things Ij*
ing about, which she would, in such a case^ donJ)(>
less have taken with her. I had never known anj
thing more of her than what I could observe or cod*
jecture. I had always, however, the idea that heti
parents or friends were wealthy, for she sometiiiMJ
received clothes and other things which were
rich.

Another nun named St. Paul, died suddenly,
as in other oases, we knew so little, or rather were
entirely ignorant of the cause and circumBl

BIAKTA MOKK.

188

that we could oplj conjecture ; and being forbidden
tospeakfreelynpontbat or any other subject, thoiight
little about it. I bave mentioned that a number of
veiled nans thus mysteriously disappeared during
my residence among them. I cannot perhaps recaU
them all, but I am confident there were as many as
five, and I think more. All that we knew in such
lease's was, that one of our number who appeared as
usual when last observed, was no where to be seen,
and never was again. — ^Mad Jane Bay, on several
such occasions, would indulge in her bold, and, as
Iwe thought, dangerous remarks. She had intimated
Ithat some of those, who had been for some time in
^6 Convent, were by some means removed to make
Dm for new ones : and it was generally the fact,
iat the disappearance of one and the introduction
(f another into our community, were nearly at the
le time. I have repeatedly heard Jane Bay say,
rith one of her significant looks, ** Whenyou appear,
omebody else disappears 1"
It is unpleasant enough to distress or torture one*8
elf ; but there is sometimes worse in being torment-
[by others, especially where they resort to force,
nd show a pleasure in compelling you, ai^d leave
m no hope to escape, or opportunity to resist. I
ad seen tiie gags repeatedly in use^ and sometimes
Implied with a roughness which seemed rather in-
lan ; but it is one thing to see and another thing
I feel. They were ready to recommend a resort to
npulsory measures, and ever ready to run for the
These were kept in one of the oommunity-
I, in a drawer between two closets ; and there
of about fifty of them were always kept in
Sometimes a number of nuns would prove

184

MABIA HONK.

refraetoiy at » time : and I have seen battles eom.
menced in which several appeared on both sides.
The disobedient were, however, soon overpowered:
and to prevent their screams from being heard be-
yond the walls, gagging commenced immediately.
I have seen half a dozen lying gagged and bound
at once.

I have been subjected to the same state of invo-
Inntary silence more than once ; for sometimes I be-
came excited to a state of desperation by the mea-
snres nsed against me, and then conducted myself in
a manner perhaps not less violent than some otben.
My hands have been tied behind me, and a gag pot
into my mouth, sometimes with such force and rade-
ness as to separate my lips, and cause the blood to
flow freely.

Treatment of this kind is apt to teach submission;
and many times I have acquiesced under orders le-
ceived, or wishes expressed, with a fear of a recQ^
rence to some severe measures.

One day I had incurred the anger of the Sn
in a greater degree than usual, and it was ordered i
that I should ^ taken to one of the cells. I wu|
taken by some of the nuns, bound and gagged, car-
ried down the stairs into the cellar, and laid opoDJ
the floor. Not long afterwards I induced one of tbe
nuns to request the Superior to come down and smI
me : and on making some acknowledgment, I wsl
released. I will, however, relate this story ratli(r|
more in detail.

On that day I had been engaged with Jane Bifij
in carrying into effect a plan of revenge nponi
ther person, when I fell under the vindictive spii
of some of the old nuns, and suffered severely. Tb

MARIA MONK.

135

Saperior ordered me to the cells, and a scene of ?io-
lence commenced which I will not attempt to de-
scribe, nor the precise circnmstances which led to it
Soffiee it to say, that after I had ezhansted idl my
strength, by resisting as long as I eonld, against se-
veral nans, I had my hands drawn behind my back,
a leathern band passed first ronnd my thumbs, then
round my hands, and then ronnd my wairt and fas-
tened. This was drawn so tight that it cut through
the flesh of iby thnmbs, making wonnds, the scars
of which still remain. A gag was then forced into
my month, not indeed so violently as it sometimes
I was, bat ronghly enough f after which I was taken
by main force, and carried down into the cellar, a-
eross it ahnost to the opposite extremity and brought
to the last of the second range of cells on the left
hand. The door was opened, and I was thrown in
with violence, and left alone, the door being imme-
tdiately dosed, and bolted on the outside. The bare
Igionnd was under me, cold and hard as if it had been
[beaten eyen. I lay still in the position in which I
^ad fallen, as it would have been difficult for me to

Aove, confined as I was, and exhausted by my ex-
ertions ; and the shock of my fall, and my wretched

titeof desperation and fear disinclined me from any
ler attempt I was in almost total darkness,

bere being nothing perceptible «xcept a slight

glimmer of light which came in through the little
idow for above me.

How long I remained in that condition I can on-
eonjectore. It seeemed to me a long time, and

mi have been two or three hours. I did not move,
Bting to die there, and in a state of distress

^Ideh I cannot describe, from the tight bondage

186

M ABIA M05K.

abont my hands, and the gag holding my jaws apart
at their greatest extension. I am confident I mmt
have died before morning, if, as I then expected I
had been left there all night. By-and-bye, however
the bolt was drawn, the door opened, and Jane Bay
spoke to me in a tone of kindness.

She had taken an opportunity to slip into the cel-
lar unnoticed, on purpose to see me. She nnbonnd
the gag, took it out of my mouth, and told me she
would do any thing to get me out of that dangeoo,
If she had had the bringing of me down she would
not hare thurst me in so brutally, and she wonldbe
resented on those who had. She offered to throw
herself upon her knees before the Superior, and beg
her forgiveness. To this I would not consent ; but
told her to ask the Superior to come to me, as I wish*
ed to speak to her. This I had no idea she would
condescend to do ; but Jane had not been gone long
before the Superior came, and asked if I rep( '
in the sight of Ood for what I had done. I re]
intheafSrmatiTe; and after a lecture of some
on the pain I had given the Virgin Maiy by injj
conduct, she asked whether I was willing to ask pa^j
don of all the nuns for the scandal I had caused
them by my behaviour. To this I made no obji
tion ; and I was then released from my prison
my bonds, went up to the community-room,
kneeling before all the sisters in succession, bej
the forgiveness and prayers of each.

Among the marks which I still bear of the woi
received from penances and violence, are the
left by the belt with which I repeatedly toi
myself, for tiie mortification of my spirit Thi
are most distinct on my side; for although

MABIA MONK.

187

I band, whieh was four to five inches iL breadth, and
I extended round the wust, was stnek fall of idiarp
jon points in all parts, it was sometimes crowded
Lost against my side, by resting in my chair, and
Ithen the wounds were usually deeper there than
ly where else.

My thumbs were several times cut severely by the
tight drawing of the band used to confine my arms ;
ud scars are still visible upon them.
The rough gagging which I several times endured
rounded my ups very much ; for it was common,
that operation, to thrust the gag hard against the
efh, and catch one or both the lips, which were
ometimes cruelly cut. The object was to stop the
Breams made by the o£fender, as soon as possible;
id some of ^e old nuns delighted in tormenting
A gag was once forced into my mouth, which
a large splinter upon it ; and this cut through
ty under lip, in front, leaving to this day a scar
rat half an inch long. The same lip was several
les wounded as well as the other; but one day
one than ever, when a narrow piece was cut off
om the left side of it, by being pinched be-
^een the gag and the under fore-teeih ; and this
I left an inequality in it which is still very ob-
roble.

[One of the most shocking stories I heard of
mts that occurred in the nunnery before my ao-
lintanee with it, was the following, which was
line by Jane Bay. What is uncommon, I can
I when I heard it. It was on New Tear's Day,
L The ceremonies, customaiy in the early
I of that day, had been performed; after mass,
h» morning, the Superior had shaken hands

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138

MARIA MONK.

with all the nans, and given na her blessing, for
she was said to have received power from heayeu
to do so once a year, and then on the first daj of
the year. Besides this, cakes, raisins, &c., are dis-
tributed to the nnns on that day.

While in the eommnnity-room, I had takenaseit
just within the cupboard door, where I often fonoii
a partial shelter from observation with Jane,
a conversation incidentally began between ns. Our I
practice often was, to take plMes there beside ou
of the old nnns, awaiting the time when she wonld
go away for a little wh&e, and leave ns partialln
screened from the observation of others. On thill
occasion, Jane and I were left for a time
when, after some discourse on suicide, sheremaitl
ed that three nuns once killed themselves in tbej
Convent. This happened, she said, not long after!
her reception, and I knew, therefore, that it wi
several years before, for she had been received i
eonsiderable time before I became a novice,
young ladies, she informed me, took the veil
ther, or very near the same time, I am not ce
which. I know they have four robes in the
vent, to be worn during the ceremony of taldngi
veil : but I never have seen more than one of M
used at a time.

Two of the new nuns were sisters, and the oil
their cousin. They had been received bat i i
days, when information was given one mor
that they had been found dead in their beds,
a prcxfusion of blood. Jane Ray said she saw!
eorpses, and that they appeared to have killed I'
selves, by opening veins in their arms with a 1
they had obtained, and all had bled togetl

MARIA MOmC.

189

Whit WW extraordinary, Jane Ray added, that she
[heard no noise, and she belioTed nobody had ana-
Ipeoted that any thing was wrong daring the night.
tlT HypoUte, however, had stated, that she had
toond them in the morning, after the other
inns had gone to prayers, lying lifeless in their

ids.

For some reason or other, their death was not

Dade pnblio ; bnt their bodies, instead of being ex-

ibited in full dress, in the ohapel, and afterwards

iterred with solemnity beneath it, were taken nn-

Bremonionsly into the cellar, and thrown into the

^ole I have so often mentioned.

There were a few instances, and only a few, in

rbich we knew anything that was happening in the

rorld ; and even then oar knowledge did not extend

it o! the city. I can recall bat three occasions of

kind. Two of them were when the cholera pre-

liled in Montreal : and the other was the election

The appearence of the cholera, in both

Bona of its ravages, gave as abundance of ocou-

ion. Indeed, we were more borne down by hard

)ar at those times, than ever before or afterwards

ring my stay. The Pope had given early notice

kit £e burning of wax candles could a£fo^l pro-

etion from the disease, because, so lor ^ as any

Bon continued to bum one, the Virgin Mary

odd intercede for him. No sooner, therefore,

the alarming disease made its appearance in

fo&treal, than a long wax candle was lighted in the

ayent, for each of the inmates, so that all parts

it in use were artificially iUuminated day and

^t Thus a great many candletjrere constantly

ling, which were to be replaced froin those

140

HARIA MOHK

maotifaotQred by the nmii. Bat this was t trifle.
The Pope's message having been promulgated io
the Grey Nunnery, and to Catholics at large through
the pulpits, an extraordinaiy demand was oreated
for wax oandles, to supply which we were princi.
pally depended upon. All who conld be employ*
ed in making them were therefore set to work, and
I, among the rest, assisted in different departmentB,
and witnessed all.

Numbers of the nuns had been long familianritb
the business; for a very considerable amoantof
wax had been annually manufactured in the Coo.
▼ent ; but now the works were much extended, and
other occupations in a great degree laid aside.
Large quantities of wax were received into the
building, which was said to have been imported
from England: kettles were placed in some of the
working-rooms, in which it was clarified by heet
over coal fires, and when prepared, the process i
dipping commenced. The wicks, which were
long, were placed, hanging upon a reel, taken op
and dipped in succession, nntU after many C
revolutions of the reel, the oandles were of
proper size. They were then taken to a partdj
the room where tables were prepared for rolL
them smooth. This is done by passing a roller o<
them, until they became even and polished;
which they are laid by for sale. These p;
caused a constant bustle in some of the rooms:
the melancholy reports from without, of the rs^
ges of the cholera, with the uncertainty of
might be the result with us, notwithstimdiog
promised intercession of the l^gin, and bm
tights constantly burning in such numbers aroi

MARIA MONK.

141

IB impressed the scenes I nsed to witness yery

Beply on my mind. X had yezy little donbt of the

.jict troth of the story we haye heard of the se-

Bority conferred npon Uiose who bnmt oandles, and

ret Bometimes serions fears arose in my mind.

these thoughts I did my utmost to regard as great

dns, and evidences of my want of fail£.

It was during that period that I formed a partial

eqaaintance with seyeral Grey Nans, who used to

Dme frequently for supplies of candles for their

Convent. I had no opportunity to conyerse with

lem, except so far as &e purchase and sale of the

rtieles they required. I became familiar with

^dr countenances and appearances, but was unable

I judge of their characters or feelings. Concern-

[ the rdes and habits preyailing in Sie Grey Nun-

ft I therefore remained as ignorant as if I had

I a thousand miles off: and they had no better

irtanity to leam any thing of us, beyond what

[ey could see around Uiem in the room where the

todies were sold.

iWe supplied the Congregational Nnnnery also
|ih wax candles, as I before remarked ; and in
these institutions, it was nnderstood, a con-
at illumination was kept up. Citizens were al-
[frequently running in to buy candles in great
' flinall quantities, so that the business of store-
ping was far more laborious than common.
le were confirmed in our faitii in tiie interces-
i of the Virgin, when we found that we remain-
jisfe from cholera; and it is a remarkable fact,
not one case of that disease existed in the
ft daring either of the seasons in which it
10 fatal in the city.

u ~:i' ,.)

:sr!^-^i'l'

m"M-^ r!

iHHffi!

hHH

Ifl

142

lusu Moiac.

When the election rioti pnTsiled it Moutreil,
the city was thrown into general alarm ; we heuj
■ome reports from ^y to day, which made q8 tax.
ioua for onrselyes. Nothing, howeyer, gave me
any aerions thonghts, until I saw nncommonmoyei
menta in some parts of the Nunnery, and a8cerUin<
ed, to my own satisfaction, thai there was a luge
quantity of gunpowder stored in some secret pliei
within the walls, and that some of it was remoTed,
or prepared for use, under the direction of the Sii<
perior.

Penanee$. — I have mentioned seyeral penancNig
different parts of this narration, which we gono'
times had to perform. There are a great yarietjol
them ; and, while some, though tri£ng in appes^ !
anee became very painful, by long endurance orH
quent repetition, others are severe in their naton,
and never would be submitted to, unless, throngl
fear of something worse, or a real belief in thii?{
efficacy to remove guilt. I will mention here nth j
as I lirecollect, which can be named withoat
mg a virtuous ear: for some there were, which ill
though £ have been compelled to submit to,
by a miskd conscience, or the fear of severe pn
ishment, now that I am better able to judge ofi
duties, and at liberty to act, I would not me
or describe.

Kissing the floor is a very common
kneeling and kissing the feet of the other niuiii|
anothes; as are kneeling on hard peas, and'
with them in the shoes. We had repeatedly to \
on our knees through the subterranean pa
lead^g to the Congregational Nunnery ; and i
times to eat our meals with a rope round ooroe

MARU MONK.

148

^metimes we were fed only with snoh things as we
lost disliked. Garlie was giyen to me on this ao-
)Qnt, because I had a strong antipathy against it.
Eels were repeatedly given some of ns, because
I felt an onoonqnerable repugnance to them, on
Boant of reports we heard of Uieir feeding on dead
joases in the river of St. Lawrence. It was no
icommon thing for ns to be required to drink the
Iter in which the Superior had washed her feet,
bmetimes we were required to brand ourselves
[tb a hot iron, so as to leave soars ; at other times,
I whip our naked flesh with several small rods, be*
B a private altar, until we drew blood. 1 can as*
k, witi^ the perfeot knowledge of the fact, that
ay of the nuns bear the soars of these wounds.
)iie of the penances was to stand for a length of
ie with our arms extended, in imitation of the
^oar on the Gross. The Chemin de la croix^ or
^d to the Cross, is, in fact, a penance, though it
Bists of a variety of prostrations, with the repeti-
of many prayers, oceupying two or three hours.
B we had to perform frequently going in ohapel,
I lalUng before each ehapelle in succession, at
1 time commemorating some particular act or
unstance reported of Uie Saviour's progress to
place of his crucifixion. Sometimes we were
Bd to sleep on the floor in the winter, with no-
; oyer ns but a single sheet ; and sometimes to
a piece of window glass to a flne powder, in
bresence of the Superior.
I had sometimes to wear a leathern belt stuck
kt sharp metallio points, round our waists and
[pper part of our arms, bound on so tight that
penetrated the flesh, and drew blood.

144

MABIA MONK*

Some of the penaneei were lo e^Tere, ihai tht?
•eemed too rnnoh to be endured ; and when they
were imposed, the nims who were to suffer then
showed the most yiolent repugnance. They woald
often resist, and still oftener express their oppoaiiioo
by exclamations and screamSo

Neyer, however, was any noise heard from then
for a long time, for there was a remedy always retd;
to be applied in cases of the kind. The gag whien
was put into the month of the nnfortimate Saiot
Frances, had been brought from a place where then
were forty or fifty others of different shapes ini
sizes. These I have seen in their depository, whidi |
is a drawer between two closets, in one of tiiecom*
monity-rooms. WhencTer any loud noise was madij I
one of these instmments was demanded, and gi^
ging commenced at once. I have known many iDsttiH
ees, and sometimes five or six nuns gagged at ooeil
Sometimes, they wonld become so much excited be-J
fore they isonld be bound and gagged, that con8id6^|
able force 7as necessary to be exerted; and IhiK
seen the blood flowing from mouths into which I
gag had been thrust ?dth Tiolence.

Indeed I ought to know something of this def
ment of nunnery discipline ; I have had it
npon myself, and can bear witness that it is not(
most humiliating and oppressive, but often eztic
ly painful. The mouth is kept forced open, sndt
straining of the jaws at their utmost stxetch, for|
considerable time, is very distressing.

One of the worst punishments which I ever i
inflicted, was that with the cap ; and yet sodm]
the old nuns were permitted to inflict it at '
pleasure. I have repeatedly known them to gol

MABIA MONK.

145

ft oiPt when one of onr number had trtneppressed a
rale, sometimea thongh il wera a Taiy onimportant
These capa wara kept in a enpboard in the old

one

HODS* room, whence they were hronght when wanted.
They were small, made of a reddish looking lea-
er, fitted elosely to the head, and fastened nnder
e ehin with a land of bnckle. It was the com-
ion practice to tie the nan*a handa behind, and
gg her before the cap was pat on, to prevent noise
jid resistance. I never saw it worn by any one
[or i moment, without throwing them into severe
'erings. U permitted, they wonld scream in the
i08t shocking manner, and alwaya writhed as mi^ch
tiieir confinement wonld allow. I can apeak
m personal knowledge of this punishment, aa I
ITS endured it more ihan onca ; and yet I have no
et of the cause of the pain. I never examined
e of the caps, nor saw the inside, for they are
[ways brought and taken away quickly ; but al*
iOQgh the first sensation was that of eoolnesa it
hardly put on my head before a violent and in-
ribable sensation began, like that of a blister,
\j much more insupportable : and thia oonthiued
itil it was removed. It would produce auch an
lie pain as tothrown8intocoovuliBion8,andIthink
human being could endure it for an hour. After
punishment, we felt, its effects through the sya-
for many days. Having once known what it
by experience, I held tiie cap in dread, and
aeyer I was eondemned to suffer the punislunent
in, felt ready to do any thing to avoid ii^ But
m tied and gagged, with the cap on my head ^
m,Ieonld only sink upon the floor, and roll
it in anguish until it was taken off.

146

MARIA MONK.

This WM uoally done in about ten minntes, some-
times less, lip the pain always contiiiiied in my
head for several days. I thought that it might
tsJiie away a person's reason if kept on a much longer
time. If I had not been gagged, I am sore I
should have uttered awful screams. I have felt the
efTects for a week. Sometimes fresh cabbage leaves
were applied to my head to remove it. Having had
no opportunity to examine my head, I eamiot
say more*

CHAPTER XVIII.

The plinlsh]|i«nt of the Gap— The Priests of the District ol I
Montreal hftTe free aeeesB to the Blaek Nannery-Crinw
oommittad and required by them— The Pope's conuDindj
to oommit indeoent Crimei^Charactera of the Old iDil
New Sapcvion— The timidity of the latter— I began to li|
employed In the Heapitala— Some aeeomit of them-l
Warning ghren me by a aiek Nnn— Penance of Hanging.

This punishment was occasionally resorted to fa
very trifling offences, such as washing the ha
without permission ; and it was generallv applie
on the spot, and before the other nuns in the co
mnnity-room,

I baye mentioned before, that the eonnti7,8ofij
down as Three Bivers, is furnished with priests I
the Seminazy of Montreal ; and that these himd
and fifty men are liable to be occasionally tranafe
from one station to another. Numbers of them i
often to be seen in the streets of Montreal, as ^
may find a home in the Seminary.
» They are considered as bating an eqaal rightj
enter the Black Nunnery wheneyer tiiey pi
and, then, according to our oaths, they ha?ecoiDpl(

MARIA MONK.

147

control over iho nuns. To name all the works of
ihimeof which they are guilty in th&t retreat, would
leqniie much time and apace, neither would it be
neeessaiy to the accomplishment of my object,
whieh is, the publication of but some of their crimi-
nilitj to the world, and the deyelopement in general
[ teims, of scenes thus far carried on in secret within
the walls of that Conyent where I was so long
[in inmate.

Seeore against detection by the world, they never
IbeUeved that an eye-witness would ever escape to
[tell of their crimes, and declare some of their names
[before the world ; but the time has come, and some
[ iheir deeds of darkness must come to the day. I
iTO seen in the Nunnery, the priests from more,
[piesome, than a'hundred country places, admitted
r shameful and criminal purposes; from St.
Iitrles, St. Denis, St. Mark's, St. Antoine, Gham-
l7,6ertier, St. John's, &e.
How unexpected to them will be the disclosures
[make! Shut up in a place from which there has
i fho^ht to be but one way of egress, and that
kepMsage to the graye, they considered themselyes
fe in perpetrating onmes in our presence, and in
ling us share in their criminality as often as they
^OM, and conducted more shamelessly than even
ibrotes.

Ilhese debiuch6es would come in without cere-
ay, eoncealing tiieir names, both by night and
;. Being within the walls of that prison-house
[Ml, where the cries and pains of ,the injured
nee of their yictims would neyer reach tha
for relief or redress for thair wrongs^ with-
inmorse or Bhaoiey they would glory, not onlj

148

MABIAMOmL

in Mtbg their bnital passions, bat eyen in tortorug
in the most barbarous manneri the feelings of tbose
nnder their power; telling us at the same time, that
this mortifying the flesh was religion, and pleasing
to God. The more they conld torture ns, or make
us violate our own feelings, the more pleasure they
took in their nnclean revelling; and all their brotal
obscenity they called mexitorions before God.

We were sometimes invited to put oursehes to
voluntary sufferings in a variety of ways, not for a
penance, but to show our devotion to God. A priest
would sometimes say to us—

'* Now, which of yon have love enough for Jesni
Christ to stick a pin through your cheeks V*

Some of us would signify our readiness, and im-
mediately thrust one through up to the hea<1< Some-
times he would propose that we should I'er ^ fVel
operation sevend times on the spot ! and 11'
of a number of the nuns would be bloody.

There were other acts occasionally proposed andj
consented to, which I cannot name in i^ book.!
Such the Superior would sometimes command
to perform ; many of them, things not onlynsele
and unheard of, but loathsome and indecent in tb^
highest possible degree. How they ever eoo
have been invented, I never could concei?
Things were done worse than the entire expos
of the person, though thla was occasionally reqoir
of several at once m the presence of priests.

The Superior of the Seminary would sometiii
come and inform us, that she had received or'
from the Pope, to request that those^mns whof
sessed the greatest devotion and faith, shonld I
le^aested to perform some particular deeds, wli

^,iif"*- "•

MARIA MONK.

149

ilj0 .named or described in our preseneo, bat of
whioh no deeent or moral person eonld ever endnre
to speak. I cannot speak what wonld injure any
ear, not debased to the lowest possible degree. I
am bound by a regard to tmth, however, to confess,
that deluded women were found among us, who
woold comply with their requests.

There was a great difference between the charao-
ters of our old and new Superiors, which soon be-
came obrious. The former used to say she liked
to walk, because it would prevent her from becom-
ing corpulent. She was, ttierefore very active, and
eonstantly going about from one part of the Nun-
nexy to another overseeing us at our various em-
Iployments. I never saw in her any appearance of
timidify; she seemed, on the contrary, bold and
mascnline, and sometimes much more than that,
emel and cold-blooded, in scenes calculated to over-
[eome any common person. Such a character she
Ibid particularly ezhLbited at the murder of St.
innces.
The new Superior, on the other hand, was so
keavy and lame, that she walked with much diffi-
/, and consequently exercised a less vigilant
rerdght of the nuns. She was also of a timid
)8ition, or else had been overcome by some
ftt fright in her past life ; for she was apt to be-
ome ahtfmed in the night, and never liked to be
le in the dark. She had long performed the
of an old nun, whioh is that of a spy upon the
ones, and was well known to us in that
Bter, under the name of St. Margarite. Soon
bar promotion to the station of Superior, she
dinted me to sleep in her apartment^ and assign-

, ■ >

160

IIABU MONK.

ed me a eofa to lie npon. One night, while I wis
uleep, she snddenlj threw hereell upon me, anj
exclaimed in great alarm, " Oh I mon Diea 1 mon
Dieu! qa'estqne ca?" (Oh! my God! my God I
what is that?*') I jumped up and looked about the
room, but saw nottiing, and endeavoured to con*
yince her that there was nothing extraordinan
there. But she insisted that a ghost had come and
held her bed-curtain, so that she could not draw it.
I examined it, and found that the curtain had been
caught by a pin in the valence, which had held it
back : but it was impossible to tranquilize her for
some time. She insisted on my sleeping with her
the rest of the night, and I stretched myself across
the foot of her bed, and slept there till mombg.
During the last part of my stay in the Convent,
I was ofton employed in attending in the hospitals.
There are, as I have before mentioned, seyerai
apartments devoted to the sick, and there is aphy-
sioian of Montreal, who attends as physician to the I
Convent. It must not be supposed, however, that
he knows anything concerning the private hospitals. |
It is a faet of great importance to be distinctly nn*
derstood, and constanUy borne in mind, that he iii
never, nnder any circumstances, admitted into thej
private hospital-rooms. Of those he sees
more than any stranger whatever. He is limited]
to the care of those patients who are admitted froml
the oify into the publio hospital, and one of thai
nuns' hospitals, and these he visits every dayJ
Sick poor are received for charity by the institoj
lion, attended by some of the nuns, and often
jcway with the highest ideas of our charitable ch
aeters and holy lives. The physician hi^

MARIA MONK.

161

might, perhaps, in some eases share in the delnsion.
I frequently followed Dr. Nelson through the
pablio hoBpiti^, at the direction of the Superior,
with pui, i^f and paper, in my hands, and wrote
down the prescriptions which he ordered for the dif-
ferent patients. These were afterwards prepared
and administered hy the attendants. Ahont a year
before I left the Convent, I was first appointed to
attend the private^ sick-rooms^ and was frequently
employed in that duty up to the day of my de-
pgrtnre. Of course I had opportunities to obserre
the number and classes of patients treated there ;
and in what I am to say on the subject, I appeal,
I with perfect confidence, to any true and competent
witness to confirm my words, whenever such a wit-

I ness may appear.

It would be in vain for kdj body who has merely
visited the Convent from curiosity , or resided in it
as a novice, to question my declarations. Such a
person must necessarily be ignorant of even the ex-
kenee of the private rooms, unless informed by
[tome one else. Such rooms, however, there are,
and I eonld relate many things which have passed
Ithere during the hours I was employ ed in them, as

II haye stated.
One night I was called to sit up with an old nun,

led St. Clare, who, in going down stairs, had dis-
Bd a limb, and lay in a sick-room adjoining the
hospital. She seemed to be a little out of her head
I pert of the time, but appeared to be quite in pos-
ition of her reason most of the night, It was easy
I pietend that she was delirious : but I considered
ker M speaking the truth, though I felt reluctant to
what I heard her say, and excused myself

fej'

Bfi

162

MARIA MONK.

from mentioiimgiieven at oonfession, on the groood
that the Superior ihoaght her deranged.

What led her to some of the most remarkable parts
of her conTeraation was, a motion I made, in the
course of the night, io take the light out of her Ut.
tie room into the adjoining apartment, to look once
more at the siek persons there. ^ She hegged me not
to leave her a moment in the daric, for she eonldnot
bear it. " I have witnessed so many horrid scenes,"
said she, "in this Conyent, that I want somebody
near me eonstantl j, and must always have a light
bnming in my room. I cannot tell yon," she added,
" what things I remember, for they wonld frighten
yon to mnch. What yon haye seen are nothing to
them. Many a mnrder haye I witnessed; many
a nice yonng creature has been killed in this Knov
nery. I advise yon to be very cautions — keep eveiy j
thing to yourself — there are many here ready to be*
tray yon.'*

What it was that induced the old nun to expien
so much kindness to me I could not tell, mileBSBha
was frightened at the recoUeotion of her own Crimea,
and ttiose of others, and felt grateful for the cue I
took of her. She had been one of the night watehei,|
and never before showed me any particular kmdnegg.]
She did not indeed go into detail concerning tiie
transactions to which she alluded, but toldmefhi
some nuns had been murdered under great aggnT
tions of cruelty, by being gagged, and left to star
in the cells, or having their flesh burned o£f the
bones with red hot irons.

It was unconmion to find compunction expi
by any of the nuns. Habit renders us insensi
the sufferings of others, and careless about our 01

{round

leputs
in the
ber lit*
(okonce
1 me not
(onldiiot
scenes,"
omebody
e a light
tie added,
llrigbteQ
iofhmgto
sd; minj
thislSim-
keepeveiji
BadytoW]

toexpien

MARIA MONK.

163

lataggtv
jflto .
id off ihei

exp
iseni
)nioaitf

i{og. I had beeome so hardened myself, that I find
it diffienlt to rid myself of many of my f onner false
prinoiples and yiews of right and wrong.

I was one day set to wash some empty bottles
from the cellar, whieh had contained the liqnid that
wag poured into the cemetery there. A nnmber of
these bad been bro^jight from the comer where so
Diny of them were always to be seen, and placed at
the head of the eellar stairs, and there we were re-
loired to take them and wash them ont. We ponr-
Icdin water and rinsed them ; a few drops which got
ipon oiir clothes soon made holes in them. I think
'le liquid was called yitriol, or some sneh name,
id I heard some persons say that it would soon
)j the flesh and even the bones of the dead.
mother time, we were famished with a little of
le liquid, which was mixed with a quantity of wa-
r, and used in dyeing some cloth black, which was
[ted at fonerals in the chapels. Our hands were
led Toiy black by being dipped in it, but a few
I of some other liqnid were mixed with fresh
\ and given ns to wash in, which left onr skin
I bright red.

The bottles of which I spoke were made of yery

^ck dark-coloured glass, krge at the bottom, and,

lould say, held something less than a gallon.

was once much shocked, on entering Sie room

the examination of conscience, at seeing a nun

iging by a cord from a ring in the ceiling, with

head downward. Her dothes had been tied

id with a leathern strap, to keep them in their

k and then she had been fastened in that situa-

with her head some distance from the floor.

face had<a vexy unpleasant ftppearance, being

■m

154

MARIA MONK.

dark eoloared, and swollen by the rushing in of the
blood ; her hands were tied, and her month stopped
with a large gag. This nnn proved to be no other
than Jane Ray, who for some fanlt had been con-
demned to this pnnishment.

This was not, however, a solitary case ; I heard of]
numbers who were ** hnng," as it was called, at dif.j
ferent times i and I saw St Hypolite and St. Lakel
undergoing it. This was considered a most distresj
sing pnnishment; and it was the only one whicli
Jane Bay oonld not endnre, of all she had tried.

Some of the nnns wonld allude to it in her pr
senoe, but it usually made her angry. It was pnl
ably practised in the same place while I was a ni^
vice, but I never heard or tiiought of such a
in those days. Whenever we wished to enter
room for the examination of conscience, we hid I
ask leave, and, after in>me delay, were permifi
to go, but always under a strict charge to bend
head forward, and keep the eyes &ed npon
floor.

CHAPTER XIX.

Mora visit! to the impriioned Nans— Their Fetn-^d
temporarily pot into the eelle— Belios— The Agnns r
The PrieiU' private Hospital, or Holy BetreaM
rooms in the Eastern Wing— Beports of Murden ioj
Convent— The Superior's private Becords-Nnmb
Nuns in the Convent— Denra of Escape— Urgent
for it— Plan— Deliberation— AUempt—bneoeBB.

lovTBH seized an opportunity, when Isafeljc
to speak a cheering or friendly word to one of
poor prisoners, in passing their cells, on myer
in the cellars. For a time I supposed them

MARIA MOTTK.

155

liiten; but I afterward! diaeoverad that thia waa
I not the ease. I found that they were alwaya under
the fear of Buffering aome punishment, in ease they
[iboald be found taUdng with a person not oommis-
liioned to attend them. They would often ask, ** Is
Doi somebody eoming V*

I eoald easily believe what I heard affirmed by

ben, that fear waa the severest of their sufferings.

onfined in the dark, in so gloomy a place, with the

arched cellar stretching off tiiis way and that,

Bd only now and then by a solitary nun, with

bom they were afraid to speak their feelings, and

* only the miserable society of each other ; how

ly thus to spend day after, day, months, and

years, without any prospect of liberation, and

ble tt any moment to another fate to which, the

bop or Superior might condemn them ! But these

leieatnres maat have known something of the

perpetrated in other parts of the building,

i eoold not have been k^orant of the hole in the

r, which waa not far nrom the cells, and the use

ifhieh it was devoted. One of them told me, in

Idence, she wished they could get out. They

|utal80 have been often distuxlied in their sleep,

\vj ever did sleep, by the numerous priests who

' through the trap-door at no great distance.

{be sabject to auch trials for a single day would

' ~ ; but these nuns had them to endure

[years.

[often felt much compassion for them, and wished

I them released; but at other times yielding

I doetrine perpetually taught us in the Convent,

jonr fntnre happineas would be proportioned to

liafferingB we had to undergo in ibis world, I

166

KABIA MONK.

would reft ntiifled that their imprisonmeut wis ai
real blessing to them.

Others, I presume, participated with me in Boehl
feelings. One Sonday afternoon, after we had ml
formed all onr ceremonies, and were engaged uj
usual, at that time, with backgammon and otberl
amusements, one of the young nuns exoIaimedJ
«• Oh ! how headstrong are those wretches in the
cells, they are aa bad as the day they were
put in !"

This exclamation was made, as I supposed, in eonj
sequence of some recent conversation with them,
I Imew her to be particularly acquainted with thj
older one.

Some of the vacant cells were occasionally
for temporary imprisonment Three nnns wc
confined in them, to my knowledge, for disobedie
to the Superior, as she called it. They did not jo
the rest in singing in the evening, being exhao
in the various exertions of the day. The
ordered them to sing : and, as Hiey did noteonip
after the command had been twioa repeated, i
dered them away to the cells.

They were immediately taken down into tbei
lar, placed in separate dungeoos, and the doori
and burred uj^on them. There they rei
through that night, the following day and Be
night, but were released in time to attend man {
the second morning.

The Superiorused occasionally to showsometl
in a glass box, which we were required to
with the highest degree of reverence. It was i
of wax, and called an Agnus, Dei. She need toj
hibit it to us when we were in a state of graoe:

MARIA MOVE.

157

ii, liter oonf eision and bef on storamani Sha aaid
it'hid been Uauad in the very dUh in which our
idviottf had eaten, 1% waa Dronght from Roma.
ISfeiy tima wa kiised it, or avan lookad at it, wa
were told it gaya a hnndrad day'a ralaasa from pnr-
gitoiy to onrBelvas, or if wa did not nead it, to our
next of Idn in ^pnrgatory, il not a Protestant. If wa
bid no BQch kmsman, tha baneflt waa to go to tha
losis in pnrgatoiy not prayad for.
I Jine lUy wonld sometimaa lay to ma, *' Let'a kisa
lit-iome of onr friends will thank na for it*'
I hire bean repeatedly amployad in carrying
utieeof different kinda into tha little private room
[hiTe mentioned, next beyond tha Snperior'a ait-
Dg-room, in tha second atory, wbicb tha priests
ie their ** Holy BetreatJ* That room I never
I illowed to enter. I conld only go to the door
\ I waiter of refreshments, set it down npon a
stand near it, giya three raps on tha door, and
km retire to a distance to await orders. Wben any
Bg was to be taken away, it waa placed on tha
nd by tha Snperior, who then gaya three rapa for
I, md closed Uie door.

The Bishop I saw at least once, wben ha appear-

1 worse for wine, or aomathing of tha kind. After

dng of refreshments in tha Conyent, be sent

r ill the nnns, and on onr appearance, gaya na bia

ig, and pnt a piece of pound cake on tha

Wer of each of ns, in a manner wbich appeared

Igular and foolish.

[There are three rooms in the Black Nmmaiy,

nsh Ineyer entered. I had enjoyed mncb liberty,

Ihtd seen, aa I snpposed, all parte of tha bnild-

KiWhen one day I obseryed an old nun go to a

;R!

m-ym n #

:1HM ;^ .'»'

168

MABIA MONK.

eorner of in apartment near the northern end of the
weetem wing, puih the end of her icisson bto •
erack in the panelled wall, and pall ont a door. I
was mneh snrprised, because I never had conjectured
that any door was there ; and it appeared, when I
afterwards examined the place, that no iodicatioo
of it conld be discoyered on the closest scmtiny. I
stepped forward to see what was within, and saw
three rooms opening into each other: but the nun
refused to admit me within the door, which she laid
led to rooms kept as depositories.

She herself entered and closed the door, bo thai I
conld not satisfy my curiosity ; and no occasion
presented itself. I always had a strong desire to]
know the use of these apartments ; for I am snnj
they mnst have been designed for some purpose i
which I was intentionally kept ignorant, oUierwlNJ
they never would have remained unknown to me nI
long. Besides, the oldnun evidently had someitrongl
reason for denying me admission, though Bheen-f
deavoured to quiet my curiosity.

The Superior, after my admission into the Con']
Tent, had told me I had access to every room in I
building ; and I had seen places which bore witne
to the cruelties and the crimes committed under ha
commands or sanction ; but here was a saccesda
of rooms which bad been concealed from me,
so constructed as if designed to be unknown to
but a few. I am sure that ssiy person, who miglj
be able to mMm tM wli^ln that place, woo'
pronounce that seeiet door a surprising piece i
work. I never saw anything of the kind which i
peared to me so ingenious and skilfully made.
told Jane Bay what I had seen, and she said at on

■'^U MONK.

169

"Oh 7«i : and theta »«» -.
Nww.novice, whom von h^ J mnrdered while

N* I was told nothSi o?«^' "''J*"! *"»» •!■

W N«D praotised. SSmSy t^Hf*""' ''"«>»
I went into the Siib»{»J' "^ """aieiinaf.

^ « hooJc with nn^^^/ "•/?* *^»'«». 1'"' i^ng

[l«wl..titwJ^bS1Ki!'^'«««t- iad?
k Old hid it byima^l^^^ *«»>• t! fling an.
H « two bZ^^'l^e to 1« t m* take"

kit -yon enter thedw^^dr^i"'"' »» *•
M. window M.d the^rt ?//«>«• •«'<«it«,
kWue-bookB and ofte^^^S f 5*™*»"'»n«^e
M Nemed to be filled isr"*!? '*''«»«•. the

^ I lave been dnating ttelSS,? ""* ^^<>»ats
K'.bwved lettereTtack „i?^'S!*' '»''''«>'"•-
m I never looked into o«^^ ^v** «•»» ; «1-
U« were nnder at^toT <»«l'onghtof doimt

n « the same book w?.7 • '•"•• *« «wange
H.''Com.ietKk*2fti^??7»»'«'«««e!

;,;U

160

MASIA MOHK.

consented, and we opened it, and tamed over mv.
▼eral leaves. It was abont a loot and a hall long,
as nearly as I can remember, a loot wide, and aboat
two inches thick, though I cannot speak with pu^
ticnlar precision, as Jane Irightened me almoet
as soon as I touched it, by exclaiming, ** There, yon
have looked into it, and il you tell ol me, I will of
you."

The thought ol being subjected to a severe pea-
ance, which I had reason to apprehend, flattered me
▼ery much : and, although I tried to coyer my fean, j
I did not succeed very well. I reflected, howeyer, ;
that the sin was ahready committed, and that itj
would not be increased il I examined the book.

I therelore looked a little at scTeral pages, thongh j
I still lelt a good deal ol agitation. I saw at cQeel
that the Tolume was a record ol the entrance ofl
nuns and noTices into the Convent, and ol tiie birtbil
that had taken place in the Convent. Entries i
the last description were made in a brief manoerJ
on the loUowing plan : I do not give the nime
or dates as real» bat only to show the form of ent
ing them.

Saint Mary, delivered ol a son, March 16, U
Saint Cliuiee „ daughter, April 2.
Saint Matilda „ daughter, April, 80

No mention was made in the book of thede8tb(
the children, thongh I well knew not one of thfl
eould be living at £at time.

Now I presume that the period the book embn
ed was about two years, as several names near I
beginning I knew : but I can lorm only a iob
eonjeeture ol the number ol inlants bom, indn^

IfABIA MONK.

161

dired, <d eoorse, records of which it contained. I
goppoie the. book contained at least one hundred
pageii and one fourth were written upon, and that
1^ page contained fifteen distinct records. Sev-
enl pages were dcToted to the list of births. On
fluB lappoaition there mnst haye been a large nnm-
[ber, which I can easily believe to have been bom
im in the conrse of two years.
What were the contents of the other books be-
iging to the same case with that which I look-
into, I have no idea, having never dared to tonch
16 of them ; I believe, however, that Jane Ray
I well acquainted with them, knowing, as I do,
^0r intelligence and prying disposition. If she
Dold be brought to give her testimony, she would
DobUess unfold many carious particulars now un-
sown.

I un able. In consequence of a circumstance

|hich appeared accidental, to state with confidence

)a exact number of persons in the Convent one

^j of the week in which I left it. This may be a

pint of some interest, as several deaths have oe-

Bd since my taking the veil, and many burials

1 been openly made in the chapel.

|I was appointed, at the time mentioned, to lay

ithe covers for all the inmates of the Convent,

J the nuns in the cells. These covers, as

ive said before, were linen bands, to be bound

id the knives, forks, spoons, and napkins, for

These were for all the nuns and novices,

iimoiutedto two hundred and ten. As the

iber o! novices was then about thirty, I know

itkeie must have been at that time about one

Bd and eighty veiled nnns.

i!;

162

KABIA HONX.

I was occasionally troubled wiih a desire of es-
caping from the Nunnery, and was much distressed
whenever I felt so evil an imagination rise in my
mind. I believed that it was a sin, a great sin, and
did not fail to confess, at every opportunity, that I
felt discontent. My confessors informed me that I
was beset with evil spirits, and nrged me to praj
mgainst it. StiU, however, every now and ^en, I
wonld think, <* Oh, if I conld get out."

At len^ one of the priests to whom I had con-
fessed this sin, informed me, for my comfort, that
ha had begnn to pray to Saint Anthony, and ^
his intercession woidd, by-and-by, drive away the]
evil spirit. My desire of escape was partly excited
by the fear of bringing an infant to the miirdeioiu|
hands of my companions, or of taking a
whose violent effects I too well knew.

One evening, however, If onnd myself more fill-l
ed with a desire of escape than ever : and whatexj
ertions I made to dismiss the thought proved eD<|
tirely unavailing* During evening prayers, \}
eame quite occupied with it ; and when the timet
meditraon arrived, instead of falling into a doze,i
I often did, though I was a good deal
found no difficulty in keeping awake. When
exercise was over, and the otiier nuns were
to retire to the sleeping room, my station bei
the private sick-room for the night, I withdrew^
my post, wttoh was the little sitting-room adjo^
ingit

Here, then, I threw myself upon the sofa,
being alone, refleoted a few moments on the i
of eseMing whieh bad oeenrred to me. The
iisian bad arrived a little before, at half-

MABIA MONK*

16S

ind I bad row ':o accompany him as nsnal from bed
to bed, with pen, ink, and paper, to write down his
prescriptions for the direction of the old nnn, who
was to see them administered.

What I wrote on that evening, I cannot now re-
eoUect, as my mind was uncommonly agitated; bnt
my onstomary way was to note down briefly his or«
ders, in this manner—

1 d. salts, St. Matilde,
1 blister, St. Genevieve, ^c.
I remember that I wrote three orders that evAn-
ing, and then, having finished the rounds, I retnm-
I ed for a few moments to the sitting-room.

There were two ways of access to the street from
lihose rooms ; first, the more direct, from the pas-
liago adjoining the sick-room down stairs, through
{a door, into tiie Nunnery-yard, and through a
ricker gate: that is the way by which the physi-
nsaally enters at night, and he is provided
rith a key for that purpose.
J<iWonld have been unsafe, however, for me to
out that way, because a man is kept eontinu-
jlly in the yard, near the gate, who sleeps at night
a small hut near the door, to escape whose ob-
ition would be impossible. My only hope,
^eiefore, was that I might gain my passage
ragh the other way, to do which I must pass
DQgh the sick-room, then through « passage, or
Irobm usually occupied by an ola nun; ano-
passage and staircase leading down to the
i, and a large gate opening into Sie cross street*
' no liberty to go beyond the sick-room, and
iw that several of the doors might be fastened;
''I determined to try; although I have often

ftrf

•■I

164

MABIA MONK.

■inee been astoniehed tt my boldness in nndertak*
ing wbat would expose me to so many hazards of
faUore, and to severe punishment if fonnd out.

It seemed as if I acted under some extraordinary
impulse, which encouraged me to what I shoald
hardly at any other moment have thought of un-
dertaking. I had sat but a short time upon the
sofa, however, before I rose with a desperate deter-
mination to make the experiment. I therefore walk-
ed hastily across the sick room, passed into the
nun*8 room, walked by in a great hurry, and almost
without giving her time to bpeakor think, said, "A
message 1'' and in an instant was through the door,
and in the next passage. I think there was another
nun with her at the moment; and it is probable
that my hurried manner, and prompt intimation
that I was sent on a pressing mission to the Supe-
rior, prevented them from entertaining anysuspicion
of my intention. Besides, I had the written orden
of the pbysioian in my hand, which may bare
tended to mislead them ; and it was well Imown to {
some of the nuns, that I had twice left the Convent, i
and returned from choice, so that I was probabljj
more likely to be trusted to remain than mmj
the others.

The passage which I had now reached had Ber*
end doors, with all which I was acquainted; tbitj
on the opposite side opened into a community-iooni,|
where I should probably have found some of th
old nuns at that hour, and they would certainly bar
stopped me. On the left, however, was a
door, both locked and barred : but I gave the do
a sudden swing, that it might creak as littloaspc
aible, being of iron. Down the stairs I bunrii

MARIA MONK.

166

ind making my way through the door into the yard,
stepped across it, unbarred the great gate, and was

It liberty!

CONCLUSION.

The following circnmstances comprise all that is
deemed necessary now to subjoin to the preceding
narratiye.

After my arrival in New York, I was introduced
to the ahns-honse, where I was attended with kind-
ness and care, and, as I hoped, was entirely un-
known. Bat when I had been some time in that
institution, I found that it was reported that I was
a fagitive nun ; and not long after, an Irish woman,
belonging to the house, brought me a secret mes-
sage, which caused me some agitation,

I was sitting in the room of Mrs. Johnson, the
matron, engaged in sewing, when that Irish woman,
employed in the institution, came in and told me
that Mr. Conroy was below, and had sent to see me.
I was informed that he was a Roman Priest, who
often visited the house, and he had a particular
[widi to see me at that time ; having come, as I be-
lieve, expressly for that purpose. I showed un-
willingness to comply with such an invitation, and
[did not go.
The woman told me, further, that he sent me word

bat I need not think to avoid him, for it would be
ible for me to do so. I might conceal my-

eU 18 well as I could, but I should be found and

\ea» No matter where I went, or what hiding

I might choose, I should bo known ; ' and I

better come at once. He knew who I was;

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166

MARIA MONK.

and he wm authorized to take me to the Sisters of
Charitj, if I should prefer to Join them. He wojild
promise that I might sta^ with them if I choose, and
be permitted to remain in New York. He sent me
word further that he had received fall power and
authority over me from the Superior of the Hotel
Dien Nunnery at Montreal, and was able to do all
that ahe could do ; as her right to dispose of me at
her will had been imparted to him by a regular
writing received from Canada. This was alarming
information for me, in the weakness in which I ini
at that time. The woman added, that the authority
had been given to all the priests ; so that go where
I might I should meet men informed aboat me and
my escape, and fully empowered to seize me when-
ever they could, and convey me back to the Con'
vent from which I had escaped.

Under these circumstances, it seemed to me that
the offer to place me among the Sisters of Charity,
with permission to remain in New York, was mild
and favourable. However, I had resolution enongh
to refuse to see priest Conroy.

Not long afterwards I was informed, by thesame
messenger, that the priest was again in the bnildlDg,
and repeated his request I desired one of the
tlemeo ^Mmected with the institution, that a
mighi be put to such messages, as I wished to re-
eeive no more of them. A short time after, boW'f
ever, the woman told me that Mr. Conroy wished ttj
enquire of me, whether my name was not Sll
Eustace while a nun, and if I had not confessed t(|
Priest Kelly in MontreaL I answered, that it «
all true ; for I had oonfessed to him a short ^'"
while in the Nuimery. I was then told again

HABU MONK.

167

ihe priest wanted to tee me, tncl I sent baok word
thit I would see him in the presence of Mr. T — or
Mr. S— ; which, however, wm not agreed to ; and
I was afterwards informed, that Mr. Oonroy, the
Roman priest, spent an honr in the room and a pas-
sage where I had frequently been ; bat, through the
mercy of God, I was employed at another place at
that tiine, and had no occasion to go where I should
have met him. I afterwards repeatedly heard, that
Mr. Gonroy continued to visit the house, and to
ask for me ; but I never saw him. I once had de-
termmed to leave the institution, and go to the
Sisters of Gharify; but eircumstanees occurred
which gave me time for further reflection : and I was
saved from the destruction to which I should have
been exposed.

As the period of my accouchment approaehed,
\ I sometimes thought that I should not surviva it;
I and then the recollection of the dreadful crimes I
had witnessed in the Nunnery would come wfjon
me ?ery powerfully, and I would fhink it a solemn
doty to disclose tiiem before I died. To have a
knowledge of those things, and leave the world
Iwiflioat making them known, appeared to me like
la great sin, whenever I could divest myself of the
[impression made upon me by the dechurations and
iments of the Superior, nuns, and priests, of
[ihe duty of submitting to every thing, and the
necessary holiness of whatever they did or le-
goired.
The evening bi^t one before the period whieh I
ntieipated with so much anxiety, I was sitting
lone, and began to indulge in reflections of this
It seemed to me that I must be near the elosa

!i i

Sll'l

168

MARIA MONK

of my life, and I determined to make a dlsolorare at
onee. I apoke to Mrs. Ford, a woman whose ehar*
acter I respected, a none in the hospital, number
twenty-three. I informed her that I had no expeo*
tation of living long, and had some things on mj
mind whieh I wished to oommonicate before it
ahoold be teo late. I added, that I should prefer
telling them to Mr. T— — , the chaplain ! of which
she approved, aa she considered it a duty to do bo,
under those droomstancea. I had no opportimity,
however, to converse with Mr. T. at that time, and,
probably, my purpose of disclosing the facts already
given in this book, woold never have been ezeonted,
bat for what sabse^uently took place.

It was alarm which led me to form such a dete^
mination ; and when the period of triid had been
safely passed, and I had a prospect of recovery, any
thing appeared to me more unlikely than tiiat I
shoud make this exposure.

I was then a Soman Catholic, at least a great put
of my time ; and my conduct, in a great measiue,
was according to the faith and motives of a Roman
Catholic. Notwithstanding what I knew of theeon-
duct of so many of the priests and nuns, I thought
that it had no ^ect on the sanctity of the Ghonh,
or tiie authority or effects of the acts performed by
the former at the mass, confession, Sbo. I had soch
a regard for my vows as a nun, tiiat I considend
my hand as wdl as my heart irrevocably given to
Jesus Christ, and could never have aUowed any
person to take it Indeed to this day, I feel an
instinctive aversion of offering my hand, or taldiig
the hand of another person, even as an ezpressioi
of friendship.

'*f-

MARIA MONK.

109

I alio fboagbt thtt I might loon retnm to the
Citholieii ■Ithongh fear and disgust held me back.
I bid now tiii^ infant to think for, whose life I had
liippQj layed by my timely escape from the Nnn-
neiy ; what its fate might be, in case it should ever
f^ into the power of tiie priests, I conld not tell.
I bad, howeyer^ reason for alarm. Would a
ohild, destined to destruction, like the infants I
had seen baptized and smothered, be allowed to go
fbroQgh the world unmolested, a living memorial
of the troth of crimes long practised m security,
I because ncTcr exposed? What pledges could I get
to satisfy me, that 1, on whom her dependence must
be, would be spared by those who, I had reason to
think, were wishing then to sacrifice me ? How
|€oold I trust the belpless infant in hands whicb had
[hutenedthe baptism of many such, in order to
Inmy fliem into the secret pit in the cellar? Could
^soppose that Father Phelan, Priest of the Parish
mh ofMontredlt would see his own child grow-
up in the world, and feel willing to run the
m hsTing the truth exposed ? What could I ex-
especially from him, but the utmost rancour,
the most determined enmity, against the inno-
nt ehild and its abused and defenceless mother ?
Tet,mymind would sometimes still incline in
ke opposite direction, and indulge the thought, that
rhaps the only way to secure heayen to as both
IB to throw ourselyes back into the hands of the
lnu»h, to be treated as she pleased.— -When, there-
B, the fear of immediate death was remoyed, I
Bed all thoughts of oommunioating the sub-
of the facts of this yolume. It happened,
oweTer, that my danger was not passed. I was

f:i|

h.\

170

MARIA MONK.

•oonieised with Tery alarming a^ptomi; that
my deaire to diaolose my atoxy reyiyed.

I had before had an opportimity to speak in prj.
yate with the chaplain ; but, as it was at a time
when I supposed myself oat of danger, I had de-
ferred for three days my proposed commonication,
thinking that I might yet avoid it altogether. When
my symptoms, however, became more alarming, I
was anzions for Saturday to arrive, the day which I
had appointed; and when I had not ^e oppor-
tonity, on that day, whioh I desired, I thought
it might be too late. I did not see him till Monda?
when my prospects of snrnving were very gloomj,
and I then informed him that I wished to commiuu-
cate to him a few secrets, which were likely othe^
wise to die with me. I then told him, that while
a nun, in the Convent of Montreal, I had witnessed
the murder of a nun, called Saint Frances, and of
al least one of the infants which I have spoken of
in this book. I added some few oiroumstanoes, ani
I believe disclosed, in general terms, some o! thi
crimes I knew of in that ^^unnexy.

My anticipations of death proved to be anfonnd
•d ; for my health afterwards improved, and hid I
not made ti^e confessions on that occasion, it is veiy
possible I never might have made them. I, how
ever, afterwards, felt more willing to listen to in<
atruction, and experienced friendfy attentions froi
some of the benevolent persons around me, wlii
taldng an interest in me on account of my darkem
nnderstanding, furnished me with the Bible, ani
were ever ready to counsel me when I desired it

I soon began to believe thai Ood might hayei
tended that his creatures i^ould learn his will '

MABU MONK.

ig hif word, and taUng apcm iham the fne ts-

of their reMon, and acting under responsi-
_ to him.

li'li diffionlt for one who has never given way to
j^ irgamenti and influences as those to which
hid been exposed, to realize how hard it is to
link iiight, after thinking wrong. The Scriptures
iwiyi effBot me powerfully when I read them ; but
fMi that I hare but just begun to learn the great
iihi,in which I ought to have been early and
jioQghly instruoted. I realize, in some degree,
jwitis, that the Scriptures render the people of
i United States so strongly opposed to such doo-
_M u are taught in the Black and Congrega-
inil Nunneries of Montreal. The priests and

Qied often to declare that of all heretics, the

Idien from the United States were the most diffi-

It to be converted; and it was thought a great

iomph when one of them was brouffht over to ** the

ne iaitti.'* The first passage of Scripture that

any serious impression upon my mind, was
ke text on which the ohaplain preached on the Sab-

•fter my introduction to &e house, — " Search

8criptares."

EXTRACTS FROM PUBLIC JOURNALS,

BSLATXVB TO TBB TBUTB OF

MABU MONK'S DISCLOSURES.

I following eertifieaU appeared in the Proteotant
FtMUcatof , in March, 1836.

[i, the Subscribers, have an acquaintance with

Miria Monk, and having considered the evi-

(A diibrent kinds which has been eoUeoted in

172

MARIA MONK.

reltiion to her Mse, have no hesitatioii in deeL
our belief in the tnith of the Statements she mi
in her book, recently published in New York an]
tiUed • Awfol Dimsloanrea/ dee. ' ^

*' We at the lame time deolare that the assertio.
originally made in the Roman Catholio Newspapeil,
of Boston, that the book was copied from a worl
entitled * The Gates of Hell Opened,' is wholly de.
titnte of foondation; it being entirely new, and do
eopied from anything whatsoever.

'* And we further deoliure, that no evidenee _
been prodnoed which discredits the statements
Miss ifKHk; while, on the contrary, her stoty _.
yet reeeiyedy and continues to receive, confirmatio
from various sources.

^During the last week, two important witnes

mtaneously appeared, and offered to give
testimony in her favour. From them the foUon
delineations have been received. The first is i
affidavit given by Mr. William Miller, now a
dent of tus city. The second is a statement reeeii
ed from a young married woman, who, with U
husband, also resides here. In the clear and
peated statements made by these two witnesses,^
place entire reliance ; who are ready to famish i
isfaction to anv persons making reasonable
ries on the subject

** W. 0. Bbownbbe, ** AMOS Bbldbn, ** Johr
Slooum, *' David Wesson, <<Andbew Bbuo
'* Thoicas Hooan.'' •* D* Fanshaw.

From the American Protestant Vindieatof,

** It was expected that, after Maria Monk's i
•ures, an artful attempt would be made to w

— 7fc-

MARIA MONK.

178

jherieBtimonj — which wu done geentlj aft«r

eietpe from the Hotel Dien Nannery, by bo

ering the appearanoe of that iiiititation by piank-

l ind briekmg, and atoning, aa to deoeiTe Col.

16, who waa then requested to examine it for

lelfandthe world. The Col. misrepresented

iha iaW| he waa deceived regarding those altera-

j by the inmatea, who dragged him, aa it were,

loree through the building during hia ezamina-

I, which waa performed in the amazing abort

ice of a few hours. But time ia the grand unray-

er of mysteries. On the appearanoe of the book

! Miss Monk, the hoodwinked people of Montreal

80 surprised and stupified at finding that the

Bidate purity of the Hotel Dieu hM been so

^ raffed, that they /or^ot to think seriously on

ke'in^eot— but, understanding that the atory had

lined idmost general belief abroad, they, at last,

[m led to conjecture that perhapa it waa partiality

i pnTcnted them from belieying it at home.

send attention, therefore, in Montreal, waa di«

towards that edifice — and those residing in

immediate vicinity east a retrospective glance

ffwhat they had aeen tranaacted &ere, between

|etlme at which the * Disdosurea' were pnbliahed,

] the visit of Col. Stone. The result of this in-

tion has been lately given on the apot to the

r.'Jas. P. Miller, of New York, who visited that

for the purpose of hearing that the truth was

loilly coming to Hght The neighbours in-

oed Mr. Miller that about the time it was ru-

Dnnd that she bad exposed the institution, a mys-

rioos pile of planks, twenty-five feet in height,

been placed mysteriously in the yard, which

■•^

174

MABIA MONK.

weitt wonderfully and gradually need in progressuui
■ome improyements in the building — ^for they wen
neither employed outside nor hauled away.

WhatoTor may be the fact with regard to Maiii
Monk's alleged disclosures, those of our people who
have read your papers, are satisfied in one pobt:|
that Mr. Stone's cradibilify as a witness has beea
successfully impeached ; that his examination of
the Nunnery, was a mere sham ; tiliat he was either I
the dupe of Jesuitical imposture, or that he himself I
is a fond impostor ; that he has been unwiUuiglyorl
ignorantly befooled ; and unless he has had atangiJ
ble reward, that he has * got his labour for his paiiu.4

** Whateyer may be the facts in relation to tho
' disclosures,' we needed not your paper to satis
either that Jesuits must be as holy as the * Bles
Virgin Mother* herself, or those conventicles
unprotected females are scenes of ttie most damniog
character. — ^A Protestant."

IProm the Long Island Start of Feb, 29tli.

'* Since the publication of our last paper, webai
received a communication from Messrs. Howe an
Bates, of New York, the publishers of Miss Mook'j
* Awful Disclosures.' It appears that some inila]
ence has been at work in that city, adverse to thj
free examination of the case between her and U
priests of Canada ; for thus far the newspapers hiT
been most entirely closed against everything in h«
defence, whilst most of them have published fi'
charges against the book, some of a preposteroas i
ture, the contradiction of which is plain andpalpsU^

«• Returning to New Tork, she then first resolf
to publish her story, which she has recently do

MABIA MONK.

175

lifterflefind^nteUigent disinterested persons had sai-
led ihemselTes hj mnoh examination thatit is tme.
^enit became known in Canada that this was
liirifitention, six affidavits were published in some
J ihe newspapem, intended to destroy confidence in
Itereharacter; but these were found very contra-
in severalimportant points, and in others
I aff(ffd undesigned confirmation of statements be-
jmadebyher*

ti On the publication of her book, the New Tork

bolieDiuy* the Truth-teller, the Green Banner,

id oiher papers, made viruleni attacks upon it,

nd one of them proposed that the publishers

jjoald be ' lynched.* An anonymous handbill was

I eiioTilated in New York, declaring the work a

it Ubel, got up by Protestant clergymen,

idpxoinisingan ample refutation of it in a few

liyi. This was re-published in the Catholic Diary,

Hihfhe old Montreal affidaTits, which were dis-

bnted through New Tork and Brooklyn; and on

^e latiiority of these, several Protestant news-

ipen denounced the work as false and malicious.

I "Another charge, quite inconsistent with the rest,

I made, by the leading Roman Catholic papers

iofhers via., that it was a mere copy of an old

opean work. This had been promptly denied

ihe publishers with the offer of 100 dollars re-

1 for any book at all resembling it.

l"Tet inch is the resolution of some, and the un-

Ijief of others, that it is impossible for the pub-

ito obtain insertions for the replies in the New

ipers generally, and they have been ausuc-

in an attempt at Philadelphia.

'Thu is the ground on which the following arti-

■'il

■lib

176

MARIA HOICK.

ele hM baen offered to us, for pnbliofttion in the
Star. It was offered to Mr. Schneller, a Roman
Priest, and Editor of the Catholic Diary, for inser-
tion in his paper of Saturday before last, but refm-
ed, althongh written ezpressljr as an answer to the
affidayits and charges his preyions nmnber had con-
tained. This article has been refused insertion in
a Philadelphia paper, after it had been satisfactorily
ascertained that there was no hope of gaining id*
mission for it into any of the New York papers.

** It shonld be stated in addition, that the anther-
ess of the book, Maria Monk, is in New Tork, and
■tands ready to answer any qnestions, and snbmii
to any oiqniries put in a proper manner, and desires
nothing so strongly as an opporti»nity to prove be-
fore a conrt the trnth of her story. She has alreidf
fonnd persons of respectability who have confirm '
tome of the facts, important and likely to be ai
ed by concurrent evidence ; and much farther
timony in her fayonr may be soon expected.

** With these facts lefore them, intelligent read<
ers will judge for themsolves. She asks for inri
gation, while her opponents deny her every op[
tunity to meet the charges made against her. Mri
Schneller, after expressing a wish to see her, tothi
publishers, refused to meet her anywhere, nnlessi
his own house ; while Mr. Quarter, another liorr^
Catholic priest, called to aee her, at ten o'clock o
night, accompanied by another man, without giyii
their names, and under the false pretence of bei
bearers of a letter from her brother in Montreal.

THE END.

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION.

CHAPTER I.

JAtliberty— Doubtful what to do— Found refuge for the
night— Disappointment—My first day out of the Ck)n-
Tent-Solitude— Becollections, fears, and plans.

11 HAVE but a confased idea of the manner in which
through some of the doors ; several of them,
: UD confident, were fastened, and one or two I
stened behind me.* But I was now in the street,
id what was to be done next f I had got my
liberty ; but where should I go? It was dark, I
ras in great danger, go which way I would ; and
|or a moment, I tbought I had been unwise to
ftve the conyent. If I could return unobserved,
bonld it not be better? But summoning resolu-
poD, I tamed to the left, and ran some distance
the street; then reflecting that I had better
^e the opposite direction, I returned under the
le convent walls, and ran as fast down to St.
I's street, then turning up towards the north,
^erted all my strength, and fled for my life. It
a cold evening, but I stopped for notiiing, hav-
^g recollected the house where I had been put i^o
' for a short time, by the priest Boqne, when

'Before leaving the nunnery grounds, I ran round the
1 of the building, stood a moment in hesitation whether
1 not better letum, then hastening back to the other
B, ran to the gate, opened it and went out.

178

MARIA MONK.

prepared to enter the convent as a novice, and re-
flolved to seek a lodging there for the night.
Thither I went. It seemed as if I flew rather tiian
ran. It was by that time so dark, that I was able
to see distinctly throagh the low windows, by the
light within ; and had the pleasure to find that she
was alone with her children. I therefore went
boldly to the door, was received with readiness
and entered to take up my lodgings there once
more.

Here I changed my nun's dress for one less
likely to excite observation ; and having received
a few dolkurs in addition to make up the diferenrv
I retired to rest» determined to rise early and take
the mormng steamboat for Quebec. I knew that
my hostess was a friend of the Superior, as I
mentioned before, and presumed that it would noti
be long before she would give information against
me. I knew, however, that she could not gain
admittance to the convent very early, and felt safe]
in remaining in the house through the night.

But after I had retired I found it impossible
sleep, and the night appeared very long. In t
morning early, I requested that the son of tii(
woman might accompany me to the boat, which h(
did. At an early hour, therefore, I walked to the
steamboat, but learnt, to my regret, that it wAi
not go before night. Fearing that I might M
to the hands of the priests, and be carried back
the nunnery, and not knowing where to go, I ti
ed away, and determined to seek some retired £
immediately. I walked through a part of the cit)
and some distance on the Lachine mad, whon fii
ing a solitary phice, I seated myself in much

MABIA MONK.

179

tresBof mind, both fearfal and anxious, beyond my
poT^er of desoription. I coald not think mynelf
wie anywhere in the neighbonrhood of Montreal ;
for the priests were numerous, and almost all the
people were entirely devoted to them. They would
be very desirous of finding me, and, as I beli<:<yed,
wonld make great exertions to get me again in
(heir bands.

It was a pleasant spot where I now found my-
lelf, and as the weather was not uncomfortable in
(he day time, I had nothing to trouble me except
ij recollections and fears. As for the want of
<)d, that gave me not the slightest uneasiness, as
felt no inclination whatever to eat. The uncer-
inty and doubts I continually felt, kept me in a
;te of irresolution the whole day. What should I
? Where should I go? I had not a friend in
e world to whom I could go with confidence ;
hilemy enemies were numerous, and, it seem-
to me, all around me, and ready to seize me.
(bought of zay uncle, who lived at the dis-
co of five miles ; and sometimes I almost deter-
to set off immediately for his house. I-
m visited it often when a child, and have beeu
liyed with the utmost kindness. I remembered
i I had been a great favourite of his ; but some
idcrations would arise which discouraged me
im looking for safety in that direction. The
lamboat was to depart in a few hours. I could
Dtore to pass through the city once more by twi-
[ht; and if once arrived at Quebec, I should be
a great distance from the nunnery, m a large
r, and among a larger proportion of Protestant
abitants. Among them I might find frieudsi

■ I ■'" ii

'■'"'jliifl

180

MARIA MONBL.

or, at least, some sort of protection ; and I had no
doubt that I eonld support myself by labour.

Then I thonght again of tiie place I had leff
the kindness and sympathy, small though ti^ey
were, which I had found in some of my late com-
panions in the conyent ; the awful mortal sin I had
committed in breaking my yows ; and the terrible
punishments I should receive if taken as a fngitive
and carried back. If I should return voluntarilj,
and ask to be admitted again : what would the
Superior say, how would she treat me ? Should I
be condemned to any very severe penance? Might
I not, at least, escape death ? But then there was
one consideration that would now and then occnr
to me, which excited the strongest determination
never to return. I was to become a mother, and
the thought of witnessing the murder of my own
child was more than I could bear.

Purgatory was doubtless my portion ; and pe>
haps hell for ever — such a purgatory and hell aaj
are painted in the convent : but there was onej
hope for me yet.

I might confess all my deadly sins sometimi
before I died, and a Bishop could pardon the worsi
of them.

This was good Catholic doctrine, and I
upon it with so much hope, that I ^ as not qnil
driven to despair.

In reflections like these, I spent the whole da
afraid to stray from the secluded spot to which
had retreated, though at different times fonuioj
momentary plans to leave it, and go in various
rectians. I ate not a morsel of food, and yet fi
UO hunger. Had I been well provided, I coi

IfABIA HONK.

181

have tasted nothing in such a state of mind. The
afterooon wasted away, the sun set, and darkness
began to come on : I rose and set off again for the
city. I passed along the streets unmolested by any
one; and reached it a short time before the boat
was ready to start.

CHAPTER IL

_ forQuebec—Becognlzed— Disappointed again— Not
permitted to land— Return to Montreal— Landed and

Eassed tlirough the City before day—Lachine Canal—
itended dose of my life.

Soon after we left the shore, the captain, whom I
bad previously seen, appeared to recognize me.

He came np and inquired if I was not the daugh-
ter of my mother, mentioning her name. I had
long been taught and accustomed to deceive ; and
[it may be supposed that in such a case, I did not
iiesitate to deny the truth, hoping that I might
lavoid being known, and fearing to be defeated in
ay object. He however persisted that he knew
Qe, and said that he must insist on my returning
rith him to Montreal, adding that I must not leave
Ids boat to land at Quebec. I said but little to him,
bat intended to go on shore if possible, at the end
pf oar journey — a thing I had no doubt I might

Bfect

When we reached Quebec, however, I found, to
ny chagiin, that the ladies' maid carefully locked
lie oabin-door while I was in, after the ladies had
^ftit, who were six or eight in number.

I said little, and made no attempts to resist the

Btriction put upon me; but secretly eherished

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182

11A1;1A MONK.

(he hope o! being able, by watching an opportanity
to slip on shore at tea-time, and lose myself amonv
the streets of the city. Although a total stranger
to Quebec, I longed to be at liberty there, as I
thought I could soon place myself among persons
who would secure me from the Catholics, each of
whom I now looked upon as an enemy.

But I soon found that my last hopes were
blighted; the maid, having received, as I pre.
sumed, strict orders from :he captain, kept me
closely confined, so thatescape was impossible. I
was distressed, it is truB^ to find myself in this con-
dition ; but I had already become accustomed to
disappointments, and therefore perhaps sunk less
under this new one, than I might otherwise have
done. When the hour for departure arrived, I was
therefore still confined in the steamboat, and it was
not until we had left the shore that I was allowed
to leave the cabin. The captain and others treat-
ed me with kindness in every respect, except that
of permitting me to do what I most desired. I
have sometimes suspected, that he had received
notice of my escape &om some of the priests, with
a request to stop my flight, if I should go onboard
his boat. His wife is a Catholic, and this is the
only way in which I can account for his condact:
still I have not sufficient knowledge of his motives
and intentions to speak with entire confidence on
ihe subject.

My time passed heavily on board of the steam-
boat, particularly on my passage up the river to-
wards Montreal. My mind was too much agitated
to allow me to sleep, for I was continually medita*
ting on the scenes I had witnessed in the convent,

MARTA MONK.

188

ind anticipating with dread such as I had reason
to think I might soon be called to pass through, I
bought for a trifle while on board, 1 hardlj know
why, a small medallion with a head upon it, and
the name of Robertson, which I hung upon my
neck. As I sat by day with nothing to do, I occa-
sionally sunk into a doze for a few minutes, when
I nsnally waked with a stLrt from some frightful
dream. Sometimes I thought I was ronning away
from the priests, and closely pursued, and some-
times had no hope of esc|pe. But the most dis-
tressing of my feelings were those I suffered in the
coarse of the night. We stopped some time a'
Berihier, where a number of prisoners were tak '
on board, to be carried up the river; and tpis
caused much confusion, and added to my pain
reflections.

My mind became much agitated, worse than it
had been before ; and what between waking fears,
and Bleeping visions, I spent a most wretched
night Sometimes I thought the priests and nuns
had me shut up in a dungeon : iometimos they
were about to make away with me in a most crud
manner. Once I dreamed that I was in apknjb
house, and a coach came up to the door, into wlnSeii
I was to be put by force ; and the man who seis^
me, and was putting me in, had no head.

When we reached Montreal on Saturday mom-
I ing, it was not daylight ; and the captain, landing,
I Eet off, as I understood, to give my mother inform-
l&tion tiiat I was in his boat. He was gone a long
time, which led to conjecture that he might have
found difficulty in speaking with her; but the de-
lay proved very favourable to me, for perceiving

184

IIARTA MONK.

that I was neitber locked up nor watched, I has*
tened on shore, and pursued my way into the city.
I felt happy at my escape : bat what was I then
to do ? Whithci' could I go ? Not to my mother:
I was certain I oonld not remain long with er
without being known to the priests. '

My friendlessness and ntter helplessness, with
the dread of being murdered in the convent, added
to the thoughts of the shame that must await me
if I lived a few months, made me take a desperate
resolution, and I hurried to put it into effect.

My object was to reach iud head of the Lachine
canal, which is near ths St Lawrence, beyond the
extremity of the southern suburbs. I wallcedhas*
tily along St Paur8-street,and found all thehouseg
still shut; then turning to the old Recollet
Church, I reached Notre-Dame-street, which Ifol<
lowed in the direction I wished to go.

The morning was chilly, as the season was some-
what advanced ; but that was of no importance to
me. Day had appeared, and I desired to accom-
plish the object on which I was now bent, before
the light idiould much increase. I walked on
therefore, but the morning had broken bright be-
fore I arrived at the canal ; and then I found to
my disappointment, that two Canadians \vere at
work on ^e bank, getting water, or doing soffl6<
thing else.

I was by the great basin where the boats stait^
and near the large canal storehouse. I had not
said what was my design: it \^ as to drown mj*
leU.

Fearing the men would rescue me, I hesitati
lor some time, hoping they would retire: bntfind*!

"ARIA SfONK.

185

tog Uitt they would not. I «ei» »!»-..• » ,
looking on Uio water; it*^JT '??.''"'»*• I»tood

with tie banks, which ehdvXi^.l'^T'"' * '«"«!
wi». for lome diatanoe Z«?^•'''•««^^I>e'•
aitob the wrfaoe. The* wl ""i"" '^^ ««
right wbtoh seemed friihtfnl ^f °°*?"!8f » 'he
J.., Hooked npoa iVSTe meaw ° /Tk*'''^^? *»
death, «n<? longed to be bnri^r? ^ *^^ easiest

fu-dtogthatthSmea w:re""of ifiTtef' ^S^
pliee, I sprung ft»ni the bant Inl^ ^ .'**'* «»•
•tut in the cold water/ Thl '«^"'u'"«' *» m in-
item. I felt a sharp fr ,„„! *'"'?.' "»» ^eiy se-
K which almost immedwfit *'5°" "«» tl"«>agh
&».• and the KW± '""'f'"'' a* inwn-
[»Mrinkinginthem^d^i^/^"f»«f«t was, that

'i«e, which wet my oIothM Zt^' ''°"*" «» «°W
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186

MARIA MOini.

canse of bringing me for a few moments \o my
senses, I presume was caused by fidling, after I was
rescued, upon the stones, which lay thickly (scat-
tered near the water. I remember that the per-
sons around me continued to press me with ques-
tions, and that I still remained silent. Some of
them having observed the little medallion on my
neck, and being able to read, declared that I was
probably a daughter of Dr. Bobertson, as it bore
the name ; but to this, I also gave no answer, and
sunk again into a state of unconsciousness. '

When my senses once more retnmed, I foondj
myself lying in a bed covered up warm, in a :
and heard several persons talldng of the mass,fron
which they had just returned. I conld not imJ
agine where I was, for my thoughts were not eaa<j
ly collected, and every thing seemed strange mmi
me. Some of them, on account of the name on I
little medallion, had sent to Dr. Kobertson, to io
form him that a young woman had been prevent
from drowning herself in the basin, .who hada[
trait on her neck, with his family name stamp
upon it ; and he had sent word, that although sli
could be no relation of his, they had better '
her to his house, as he possibly might be al
learn who she was. Preparations were therefo
made to conduct me thither ; and I was soon in!
house. This was about midday, or a little later.]

The doctor endeavoured to draw from me soi
confession of my family: but I refnsed; myf«
ings would not permit me to give h\M any satu^
tion. He offered to send me to my home if I wo
tell him where I lived ; but at length, thmkiiigi

MARIA MONK.

187

its V^iaiy
after l^u
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it the per-
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Ifrom me soi

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fa a»y ^^

uioineifl^<

Uii,thiBW

unreasonable and obstinate, began to threaten to
lend me to jail*

In a short time I fonnd that the latter measnre
was determined on, and I was soon pnt into the
hands of the jailer, Captain Holland, and placed in
a priTate room in his house.

I had formerly been acquainted with his chil-
dren, but had snoh strong reasons for remaining
onknown that I hoped they would not recognize
me ; and, as we had not met for several years, I
flattered myself that such would be the case. It
was, at first, as I had hoped ; they saw me in the
iTening, but did not appear to suspect who I was.
lie ne:^ morning, however, one of them asked me
Iwerenotsister of my brother, mentioning his
e; and though I denied it, they all insisted
I mnst be, for the likeness, they said, was
rismgly strong. I irfill would not admit the
idi; but requested they would send for the Rev.
. Essoh, a Presbyterian clergyman in Montreal,
lying I had something to say to him. He soon
]e bis appearance, and I gave him some account
myself, and requested him to procure my release
m confinement, as I thought there was no rea-
why I should be deprived of my liberty.
Contrary to my wishes, however, he went and
formed my mother. An unhappy difiference hiid
sted between us for many years, concerning
ieh I would not speak, were it not necessary to
ide to it, to render some things intelligible
'eh are important to my narrative. I am will-
to bear nraeh of the blame; for my drawing
of the pension had justly irritated her. I
not attempt to justify oi' eixplain my own

188

MARIA MONK.

feelings with respect to my mother, whom I still
regard, at least in some degree, as I ought. I will
merely say, that I thought she indulged in partial'
ities and antipathies in her family during my child.
hood, and that I attribute my entrance into tlie
tannery, and the misfortunes I have suffered, to
my early estrangement from home, and my separa-
tion from the family. I had neither seen her nor
heard ftom her for several years; and knew not I
whether she had even known of my entrance into]
the oonvent, although I now learnt that she stil
resided where she formerly did.

It was therefore with regret that I heard that]
my mother had been informed of my condition ;|
and that I saw an Irishwoman, an acquaintance
hers, come to take me to the house. I hi
doubt that she would think that I had disg
her, by being imprisoned, as well as by my attemp
to drown myself ; and what would be her
towards me, I could only conjecture.

I accompanied the woman to my mother's, anj
found nearly such a reception as I had expects
Notwithstanding onr mutual feelings were mnchi
they had been, she wished me to stay with her,i
kept me in one of her rooms for several weeks, i
with the utmost privacy, fearing that my appe
ance would lead to questions, and that my impiij
onment would become known. I soon sat
myself that she knew little of what I had pa
through, within the few past years ; and did
think it prudent to inform her, for that would |
ly have increflSted the risk of my being discoTfl
by the priests. We were surrounded by thorn
went f^quently to confession, and would

MARIA MONK.

189

fhonght me a monster of wiokednessi gnilty of
breaking the most solemn tows, and a fugitive
from a retreat which is generally regarded there as
I place of great sanctitj, and almost like a gate to
heaven. I well knew tiie ignorance and prejndices
of the poor Canadians, and understood how such a
person as myself must appear in their eyes. They
felt as I formerly had, and would think it a service
, to religion and to God to hetray the place of my
eoDceahnent, if hy chance they should find, or even

I suspect it As I had become in the eyes of Catho-
lUcs, "a spouse of Jesus Christ,'* by taking l^e
iyeU, my leaving the convent must appear to them

I I forsaking of tiie Saviour.
As things were, however, I remained for some

[time nndisturbed. My brother, though he lived in
le house, did not know of my being there for a
fortnight.
When he learnt it, and came to see me he ex-
pressed much kindness towards me : but I had not
him for several years, and had seen so much
ril, that I knew not what secret motives he might
iTe, and thought it prudent to be reserved. I«
More, communicated to him nothing of my his-
017 or intentions, and rather repulsed his advan*
The truth is, I had been so long among nuns
id priests, that I thought there was no sincerity
ivirtne on earth.

What were my mother's wishes or intentions to*

Is me, I was not informed : but I found after-

1, that she must have made arrangements to

^ve me removed from her house, for one day a

lan came to the door with a oarriage, and on

king admitted to see me, expressed herself in a

■

* , .*.

190

MARIA MONK.

friendly manner, spoke of the necessity of air an j
exercise for my health, and invited me to take i
ride. I consented, supposing we should soon re-
tarn ; but when we reached St Antoine suburbs
she drove np to a honse which I had formerly
heard to be some kind of refnge, stopped, and re-

Guested me to alight. My first thought was, that
should be exposed to certain detection, bj some
of the priests whom I presumed officiated there;
as they had all known me in the nunnery. I coald
not avoid entering : but I resolved to feign sick-
ness, hoping thus to be placed out of sight of the
priests.

The result was according to my wishes : for I
was taken to an upper room, which was used as an
infirmary, and there permitted to remain. There
were a large number of women in the house ; and
a Mrs. M'Donald, who has the management of it,
had her daughters in the Ursuline Nnnneiy at
Quebec, and her son in th» College. The natnn
of the establishment I could not fully understand:
but it seemed to me designed to become a Nanneiyj
at some future time. .

I felt pretty safe in the house, as long as I wm|
certain of remaining in Uie infirmary; for
was nobody there who had ever seen me before. |
But I resolved to avoid, if possible, ever ma
my appearance below, for I felt that I could not*
so without hazard of discovery.

Among other appendages of a Convent, which)
observed in that place, was a confessional withio
the building, and I soon learnt, to my dismay, tbi
Father Benin, one of the murderers of Saint FrtB-j
eis, was in the habit of constant attendance

MARIA MONK.

191

and eonfesBor. The reeoUeotions which I
often indulged in of scenes in the Hotel Dien, gave
me oneasineBB and distress : hnt not knowing
where to go to seek greater seclnsion, I remained
I in the infirmary week after week, still a£fecting ill-
ness in the best manner I could. At len^h I
jfoand that I was suspected of playing off a decep-
Ition with regard to the state of my health ; and at
le close of a few weeks, I became satisfied that I
)ald not remain longer without making my ap-
^earanee below stairs. I at length complied with
le wishes I heard Expressed, that I would go into
le community-room, where those in health were
iecQBtomed to resemble at work, and then some of
le women began to talk of my going to confession.
merely expressed unwillingness at first: but
lien tiiey pressed the point, and began to insist,
ly fear of detection overcame every other feeling,
id I plainly declared that I would not go. This
d to an altercation, when the mistress of the
rase pronounced me incorrigible, and said she
)idd not keep me for a hundred pounds a year.
ie, in fact, became so weary of having me there,

she sent to my mother to take me away.

[Hy mother, in consequence, sent a carriage for

S,and took me again into her house ; but I be-

le 80 vnhappy in a place where I was secluded

deatitate of all agreeable society, that I eam-

ly requested her to allow me to leave Canada. I

pe she felt ready to have me removed to a d^s-

:e, that she might not be in danger of having

attempt at self-destruction, and my confinement

rison made public.

lere was a fact which I had not disclosed, and

t' iij

192

MABIA MONK.

of which all were ignorant: vis., that which bad
80 mnoh inflnenoe in exciting me to leave the cod-
yent, and to reject every idea of retoming to it

When conversing with my mother about leaving
Canada, I proposed to go to New York. She in.
quired why I wished to go there. I made no an-
swer to that question ; for though I had never
been there, and knew scarcely any thing ahont fl]e
place, I presumed that I should find protection from
my enemies, as I knew it was in a Protestant]
country. I had not thought of going to the United {
States before, because I had no one to go with me,
nor money enough to pay my expenses; but then
a plan presented itself to my mind, by which ij
thought I might proceed to New York in safety.

There was a man who I presumed would wishtoj
have me leave Canada, on his own acconnt; and
that was the man I had so precipitately married
while residing at St. Denis. He must have M
motiveSy as I thought, foir wishing me at a
tanee.* I proposed, therefore, that he should
informed that I was in Montreal^ and anxious to gi^
to the States, and such a message was sent to hm
by a woman whom my mother knew. She bad
little stand for the sale of some articles, and hadi
husband who carried on some similar kind of bns^
ness at the Scotch mountain. Through her h
band, as I suppose, she had my message oonreje
and soon informed me that arrangements we
made for my commencing my journey, under '
care of the person to whom it had been sent

* Re was liable to be prosecuted for bigamy wbilstf
remained in Canada.— Ed.

MABIA MOniL.

CHAPTEB IV.

198

fSMcUtt oonennnioe of droomstances, which enabled me
(0 get to the 1i nlted Statea— Intentions in going there
.Oommep6e my journey— Fears of my companion^
8(op at Whitehall— Iqjury received in a canal boat-»
inlTea at New York— A solitary retreat.

It is remarkable that I was able to stay so long in
tiie iddst of Catholics without diflooverj, and at
Uit obtain the M of some of them in effecting my
flight There is probably not a person in Montreu,
I who would sooner have betrayed me into the
power of the priests than that woman, if she had
I known my history.

She was a frequent yisitor at the Conyent and
Seminary, and had a ticket which entitled her
leieiy Monday to the gift of a loaf of bread from
[tiiefoimer. She had an unbounded respect for
bie Superior and the priests, and seized erery op-
ortomiy to please them. Now the fact that she
I willing to take measures to facilitate my de-
from Montreal, afforded sufficient evidence
me of her entire ignorance of myself, in all re-
in which I could wish her to be ignorant ;
id leonfided in her, because I i^roeiwed that she
lit no stronger motive, than a dij^posiftion to oblige
ny mother.

^onld any thing occur to let her into the se-
1 of my being a fugitive from the Black Nun-
f , I knew that I could not trust to her kindness
in instant The discovery of that fact would
her into a bitter and deadly enemy. She
^oold at once regard me as guilty of mortal sin,
apostate, and a proper object of persecution.

MARIA MONK.

And this wm a nfleotion I had often reason to
make, when thinking of the nommiia Oatholics
around me. How important, then, the keeping of
my secret, and my escape before the tmth ihoold
become known, even to a single person near me.

I could realize, from the dimgers through which
I was brought by the hand of God, how difficult
it must be, in most eases, for a fngitiye from i
nunnery to obtain her final freedom from the power
of her enemies. Eyen if escaped from a convent
so long as she remains among Catholics, she is io
constant exposure to be informed against ; espe*
cially if the news of her escape is made public,
which fortunately was not the fact in my case.

If a Catholic comes to the knowledge of any fact
calculated to expose such a person, he will think
it his dufy to disclose it at confession ; and then
the whole fraternity will be in motion to seize her.

How happy for. me that not a suspicion was en-
tertained concerning me, and that not a whisper
against me was breathed into the ear of a single
priest at confession I

Notwithstanding my frequent appearance in the
streets, my removals from place to place, and thai
yarious exposures I had to discovery, contrary to
my fears, which haunted me even in my dreams,!
was preserved ; and as I have often thonght, for
the purpose of making the disclosures contained in
this volume. No power but that of God, as I hare
frequently thought, could ever have led me in safe- 1
ty through so many dangers.

I would not have my readers imagine, however, |
that I had at that period any thought of maki
known my history to the world. I wished te|

MABIA MONK.

196

niongt into the deepest possible obscurity; end
next to Uie Iter of faUing again into the hands of
the priests and Superior, I shrank most from the
ides (rf hating others aoqnainted with the soenes
I had passed through. Such a thought as pub-
lishing never entered my mind till months after
thai time. My desire was, that I might meet with
a ipeedy deaUi in obscurity, and that my name
and my shame might perish on earth togeti^er. As
for my future doom, I still looked forward to it
with gloomy apprehensions : for I considered my-
self as aknost, if not quite, removed beyond the
reach of mercy. During all the time which had
elapsed since I left the convent, I had received no
religious instruction, nor even read a word in the
scriptures; and, therefore, it is not wonderful
that! should stiU have remaiiied under the delu-
sions in which I had been educated. ^

The plan arranged for the commencement of my
journey was this ; I was to cross the St Lawrence^
to Longueil, to meet the man who was to accom-
pany me. The woman who had sent my message
into the country, went with me to the ferry, and
eiossed tiie river, where, according to appointment,
we found my companion. He willmgly undertook
I toacoompany me to the place of my destination, and
It his own expense ; but declared, that he was ap-
prehensive we should be pursued. To avoid the
priests who, he supposed would follow us, he took
tin indirect route, and daring about twelve days, or
inearly that, which we spent on the way, passed over
[a mneh greater distanoe than was necessaiy. It
roold be needless, if ii were possible, to meiiHiqn
" the plaees we visited. We crossed Carpent0ii||

UH'

■\f'.

196

MARU MONX.

ienj, and were at Sootoh-monntain and St. Albani*
arriTed at Champlain by land, and there took thi
•teamboat, leayinff it again at Burlington.

Ai we were ridmg towards Oharlotte, my com*
panion entertained fears, which, to me, appeared
ridicalons : bnt it was impossible for me to reason
him ont of them, or to hasten onr journey. Gjr.
onmstances which appeared to me of no momeot
whatever, would often influence, and sometimes
make him ohange his whole plan and direction.
As we were one day approaching Charlotte, for in-
stance, on inquiring ox a person on the way, whe-
ther Uiere were any Canadians there, and being in-
formed that there were not a few, and that there was
a Roman Gatholio Priest residing there, he immedi-
ately determined to ayoid the place, and turnback,
although we were then only about nine miles dis-
tant from it

During soTeral of the first nights after leaving
Montreal, he suffered greatly from fear; and on
meeting me in the morning, repeatedly said : '*Well,
thank God, we are safe so far I" When we airived
at Whitehadl, he had an idea that we should mn a
risk of meeting priests, who, he thought, were in
search of us, if we went immediately on ; and in-
sisted that we had better stay there a little, until
they should have passed. In spite of my anxietj
to proceed, we accordingly remained there abonts
week, when we entered a canal-boat to proceed to
Troy.

An unfortunate accident happened to me while
on our way. I was in the cabin, when a goD,
which had been placed near me» was started fron
it8 place by the motion of the boat, caused by i

MARTA MONK.

197

inoiher boit miming againtt it, and itrlldng me on
my 1^ aide, threw me to tome diitanee. The
gboek wu Tiolent, and I thonght myielf injnred,
but hoped the effecte wonld eoon pseii of. I was
iftMTwaid taken with Tomiting blood; and this
ilarming aymptom several times returned ; bnt I
was aUe to keep np.

We osme, without any unnecessary delay, from
Troy to New York, where we arrived in the mom-
iBg, either on Thursday or Friday, as I beUeve :
but my companion tnere disappeared without in-
fonning me where he was going, and I saw him no
more. Being now, as I presumed, Ibeyond the
reteh of my enemies, I felt relief from the fear of
being carried back to tiiie nunnexy, and sentenced
to deafli or the cells i but I was in a large city
where I had not a friend. Feeling overwhelmed
with my miserable condition, I longed for death ;
tnd yet I felt no desire to make another attempt to
destroy myself.

On the contrary, I determined to seek some sol-
itary retreat, and await Qod's time to remove me
from a world in which I had found so much trou-
ble, hoping and believing that it would not be long.

Not knowing which way to go to find solitude, I
ipoke to a little boy whom I saw on the wharf, and
told him I would give him some money if he would
lead me into the '* 5im^." (This is the common
word by which, in Canada, we speak of the woods
or forests.) When he understood what I meant,
he told me that there was no hu*h about New York ;
bat eonsented to lead me to the most lonely place
that he knew of. He accordingly set ol^ and I
followed him, on a long walk to the npper part d

uW-

nUH'

198

MABIA MONK.

the dtjt and beyond, until we reached the ontsh'rts
of it Tuning off from the road, we gained a Ut*
tie hollow, where were a few trees and busheB, a
considerable distance from any hoose ; and there
he told me, was the loneliest place with which he
was acquainted. I paid him for his troable out of
the small stock of money I had in my possession,
and let him go home, desiring him to come the
next day, and bring me something to eat, with a
few pennies which I gave him.

CHAPTER V.

Beflection and sorrows in solitude— Night— Fean-Ez-
posure to rain— Discovered by Strangers— Their unwel*
come kindness— Taken to the Bellevue Ahnshouse.

Theib I found myself once more alone, and truly
it was a great relief to sit down and feel that I was
out of the reach of the priests and nuns, and in a
spot where I could patiently wait for death, when
God might please to send it, instead of bemg aba*
ted and tormented according to &e caprices and
passions of my persecutors.

But then again returned most bitter anticipations
of the future. Life had no attractions for me, for
it must be connected with shame ; but death, nn*
der any eurcumstances, could not be divested of
horrors, so long as I believed in the doctrines re-
lating to it which had been inculcated upon me.

The place where I had taken up, as I sapposed,
my last earthly abode, was pleasant in clear and
mild weather ; and I spent most of my tune in as
much peace as the state of my mind would pemui

MABIA MONK.

199

1 8»w houBes, bnt no hnmaa beingSy except on the
side of i little hill near by, where were some men
it work, making sounds like those made in ham-
mering stone. The shade around me was so thick
that I felt assured of being sufficiently protected
from observation if I kept still ; and a cluster of
bushes offered me a shelter for the night As
eremng approached, I was somewhat alarmed by
the sound of voices near me, and found that a num-
ber of labourers were passing that way from their
work. I went in a fnght to the thickest of the
boflhes, and lay down, until all was again still,
and Uien ventured out to take my seat again on the

tuxf.

Darkness now came gradually on ; and with it,
fears of another description. The Uionght struck
me tiiat there.might be wild beasts in Uiat neigh-
bourhood, ignorant as I then was of the countey ;
and the more I thought of it, the more I became
akrmed. I heard no alarming sound, it is true ;
bnt I knew not how soon some prowling ferocious
beast might come upon me in my defenceless con-
dition, and tear me in pieces. I retired to my
bashes, and stretched myself under them upon the
ground: but I found it impossible to sleep ; and
my mind was continually agitated by thoughts on
the fatore or the past

In the morning the little boy made his appear-
ance again, and brought me a few cakes which he
I had purchased for me. He showed much interest
in me, inquired why I did not live in a house ; and
itwiswiui difficulty that I eould satisfy him to
let me remain in my aolitaiy and exposed condi*
tion. Understanding that I wisl^ed to continue nn-

200

MARIA MONK.

known, he assnred me that he had not told eyen
his mother ahont me ; and I had reason to believe
that he faithfully kept my secret to the last.
Though he lived a considerahle distance from my
hiding-place, and, as I supposed, far down in the
city, he visited me almost every day, even when I
had not desired him to bring me any thing. Sev-
eral times I received from him some small supplies
of food for the money I had given him. I once
gave him a half-dollar to get changed; and he
brought me back every penny of it, at his next
visit.

As I had got my drink from a brook or pool,
which was at no great distance, he brought me a
little cup one day to drink out of ; but this I was
not allowed to keep long, for he soon after told me
that his mother wanted it, and he must retam it
He several times arrived quite out of breath, and
when I inquired the reason, calling him as I nsn-
ally did, *' Little Tommy," he said it was neces-
sary for him to run, and to stay but a short time,
that he might be at school in good season. Thos
he continued to serve me, and keep my secret, at
great inconvenience to himself, up to the last day
of my stay in that retreat ; and I believe he would
have done so for three months if I had remained
there. I should like to see him again, and hear
his broken English.

I had now abundance of time to reflect on my
lost condition ; and many a bitter thought passed
through my mind, as I sat on the ground, or stroll-
ed about by day, and lay under the bashes at
night

Sooietimes I reflected on the doctrines I

MARIA MONK.

201

strines I bad ^m days,

heard at (lie snnnery, odnoeming sins and penan-
^^^Porgatory and Hell; and sometimes on my
]gte oompauions, and the crimes I had witnessed in

{be eoDTeni

Sometimes I wonld sit and seriously consider
bow I might best destroy my life ; and sometimes
would sing a few of the hymns with which I was
fiiniliar; but I never felt willing or disposed to
pray, as I supposed there was no hope of mercy for

me.
One of the first nights I spent in that houseless
jdition was stormy ; and though I crept under
je (iiickest of the bushes, and had more proteo-
ion against the rain than one might have expected,
wtt ahnost entirely wet before moAiing ; and, it
ij be supposed, passed a mere uncomfortable
ight than usual. The next day I was happy to
d the weather dear, and was able to dry my
ents by taking off one at a time, and spread*
ig them on the bushes. A night or two after,
iweTer, I was again exposed to a heavy rain, and
the same process afterward to go through
ith: but what is remarkable, I took no cold on
eroeoasion; nor did I suffer any lasting in-
from all the exposures I underwent in that
. The inconveniences I had to encounter,
, appeared to me of little importance, not being
dent to draw off my mind m>m its own trou-
; and I had no intention of seeking a mora
mfortable abode, still looking forward 6nly to
ing as soon as God would permit, alone and in
it spot

e day, however, when I had been there about
, I was alarmed at seeing four men ap*

202

MARIA MONK.

protehing me. All of them had gom, as if ont on
a shooting ezonrsion. They expressed muoh sar-
prise and pity on finding me there, and pressed me
with qnestions* I wonld not give them any satis-
factory acooont of myself, my wants, or intentions
heing only anziona iSitA they might withdraw, fl
fonnd them, however, too mnch interested to ren-
der me some serrice to he easily sent away ; and
after some time, thinking there wonld be no other
way, I pretended to go away not to return. Aft^
going some distance, and remaining some tine I
thinking they had left the place, I returned; ball
to my mortification fonnd they had concealed them-l
selves to see whether I wonld come back. Iheyj
now, more urgently than before, insisted on mA
removing to some other place, where I might bel
comfortable. They continued to question me;|
bnt I became distressed in a degree I cannot de
scribe, hardly knowing what I did. At last I oali
ed the oldest gentleman aside, and told him some*]
thing of my history. He expressed great intei
for me, ofibred to take me any where I wonld
him, and at last insisted that I should go with]
to his own house. All these offers I refused;
which one proposed to take me to the Almshon
and even to carry me by force if I would not go will]
ingly.

To this I at length consented ; bnt some
took place, and I became unwilling, so that
reluctance I was taken to that institution, whid
was about half a mile distant*

* SeejUie affldaidt of Mr. HUIiker, W^VT, "Coo

tion of Maria Monk's DisdoBures."-

If ARIA MONK.

CHAPTER VI.

nn aft the Almshoiue— Message from Mr. Conroy,
'TSmui priest in New York— His invitation to a pri-
vate inteiriew— His claims, propositions, and threats
-Mr. Kell/s message— Effects of reading the Bible.

I fig now at once made oomfortabley and attended
liib kindness and oare. It is not to be expected
iineh a plaee, where so many poor and snifering
mle lie collected, and dnties of a difficiUtnatnre
I to be daily performed by those engaged in the
I of fhe institution, that petty yezations thoold
Dtoeenr to indiyidnals of ul descriptions.
[ Bat in spite of all» I received kinwess and sym-
^y from several persons around me, to whom I
iibinkfaL

|l WIS standing one day at tha window of the

number twenty-six, which is at the end

ihe hospital bnildiing, when I saw a spot I

Tinted in a litUe walk I took from my

-place. My feelings were different now in

lespeets, from what they had been; for,

I suffered mnoh from my fears of my fa-

pmiishment, for the sin of breaking con-

Dt TOWS, I had given np the intention of dea-

png my life.

I had been some time in the institution, I
adit was reported by some about me, that I
a fogitlve nun ; and it was not long after, that
friih woman, belonging to the institution,
jht me a secret message, which caused me
M agitation.

I WIS sitting in the room of Mrs. Johnson, the
^ engaged in sewing, when that Irish wo-

ft r! V

204

MARIA MONK.

man, employed in the insiitation, oame inandtoU
me tiiat Air. Gonroj was below, and bad sent
■ee me. I waa informed that he was a Bonn,
priest, who often visited (he house, and he had
particular wish to aee me at that time; hiTiii
come, aa I believe, expressly for ^at purpose.
showed nnwillingnesa to comply with such an jnl
vitation, and did not go. The woman told nu
further, that he sent me word that I need not thiol
to avoid him, for it wonld be impossible for me
do sa I might conceal myself aa well as I coiu
but I should be found and taken. No matb
where I went, or what hiding-place I might chc
I should be known; and I had better come
once. He knew who I waa ; and he was aaiho
ized to take me to the Sisters of Charity, if
should prefer to join them. He would proo
that I might stay with them if I choose, tai
permitted to remain in New York. He sent
word further, that he had received full power
authority over me from the Superior of the Hob
Dieu Nunnery of Montreal, and was able to do
that she could do : as her right to dispose of
at her will had been imparted to him by a regnli
writing received from Canada. This was alamii
information for me in the weak state which I was j
at the time. The woman added, that the
authority had been given to all the priests ; soi
go where I might, I ahonld meet men infer
about me and my escape, and fully empow
seize me wherever they could, and convey me 1
to the convent from which I had escaped.

Under these circumstances, it seemed tomei
the offer to place me among the Sisters of Chi

MABIA MOMS.

205

ifh penDisnon to remain in New York, was mild
adfitTonrable. However, I had seaolution enough
Dt to see fhe priest Conroy.
Not long alterward, I was informed hj the same
teneDger, that the priest was again in the bnild-
M and repeated his request I desired one of
^ genilemen connected with the institution that
iitop might be put to such messages, as I wished
iieeeiTe no more of them. A short time after,
Dteyer, the woman told me that Mr. Conroj
bed to inquire of me, whether my name was
; St Enstace while a nun, and if I had not con-
jed (o Priest Kelly in Montreal. I answered,
it it was idl true ; for I had confessed to him a
(oit time while in the nunnery. I was then told
lin that tibe priest wanted to see me, and I sent
k word that I would see him in the presence of
Re?. Mr. Tappin, or Mr. Stephens; which,
raver, was not agreed to ; and I was afterwards
fined, that Mr* Conroy, the Roman priest,
it an honr in a room and a passage where I had
laently been ; but through the mercy of God,
m employed in another place lX that time, and
ino occasion to go where I should haye met
I. I ftfterwards repeatedly heard that Mr. Con-
continned to visit the house, and to ask for me ;
1 1 never saw him. I once had determined to
re the institution, and go to the Sisters of
Brity ; bnt drcumstances occurred which gave
{time for farther reflection; and I w€U saved
the degtruction to which I should have been
td,

Li the period of my accouchement approached, I
Btimea thought that I should not survive it ;

206

MARIA MONK.

and then the recollection of the dreadful orimei ll
had witneaaed in the nunnery wonld comeapomnj
yery powerfully, and I wonld think it a solem
dn^ to diadoae them before I died. To hare
knowledge of theae thinga, and leave the worli
without making them known, appeared to me lik
a great sin : whenever I eonld divest mjaelf of^
impression made npon me, by the declarations and
arguments of the Saperior, nnna, and priests, of i
daty of anbmitting to everything, and the ne
aaiy holiness of whatever the latter did or leqn

The evening but one before the period which
anticipated with ao much anxiety, I was dttiii
alonoy and began to indnlge in reflections of
kind. It seemed to me that I must be near
close of my life, and I determined to make a
dosnre at once. I spoke to Mrs. Ford, a woi
whose character I respected, a nurse in the ho
tal, in number twenty-three. I informed her I
I had no expectation of living long, and had boo
things on my mind which I wished to comoni
cate before it should be too late. I added, that {
should prefer to tell them to the Bev. Mr.Tapra
the ehaplain, of which she approved, as she <
sidered it a duty to do ao under these droiuna
ces. I had no opportunity, however, to eonve
with Mr. T. at that time, and prohal,
purpose of disclosing the facts already given
thia book, would never have been execntedbotf
what aubsequently took place.

It waa alarm which had led me to form
determinations and when the period of trial
been safely passed, and I had a prospect of

MARIA MOinC.

iiT, ID? thing appeared to me more likely
that I would make this expoenre.

207
than

IwMfben a Boman Cafholie, at least a great

of my time ; and m j eondnot, in a great mea-

I, W88 according to the faith and motiyes of a

jiD CaUioUo. Notwithstanding what I knew

. {he condaot of so many of the priests and nons,

{honght that it had no effect on the sanctity of

16 Ghnioh, or flie authority or effects of the acts

[onned by the former at the mass, eonfession,

I had such a regard for my tows as a nnn,

at I considered my hand as well as my heart ir-

oeably given to Jesns Christ, and conld never

iTe aUowed any person to take it. Indeed, to

is day, I feel an instinctiye aversion to offering

lyhand, or taking the hand of another person,

en as an expression of friendship. I also thought

it I might soon return to the Catholics, although

r and disgust held me back. I had now that in-

ittotiunkfor, whose life I had happily saved

my timely escape from the nunnery ; and what

fate might be m ease it should ever fall into

power of the priests, I could not telL

I had, however, reason for alarm. Would a

Id destined to destruction, like the infants I had

in baptized and smothered, be allowed to go

lugh the world, unmolested, a living memorial

lihe troth of crimes long practised in security,

iose never exposed t What pledges could I get

satisfy me, that I, on whom her dependence

be, would be spared by those who I had rea-

to think were tiien vnshing to saorifice me ?

eoold I trust the helpless infant in hands

had hastened the baptism of many such in

f08

HABIA MONK.

carder to hiiny them to the secret pit in fheeellv?
Conld I suppose that Father Phelan, Priett oftu
Pariih Chureh of Montreal, woald see hU ovn
child growing up in the world, and feel wiUiosj
to ron the risk of having the tmih exposed?
What eonld I expect, especuilly from him, but the
utmost rancour, and the most determined enmitr
•gainst the innocent child and its abnsed and de*|
iuiceless mother. i

Yet my mind wonld sometimes still iocline in
the opposite direction, and indulge the thooghtj
that perhaps the only way to secure heaven to ml
both, was to throw onrseWes back into tiie handil
of the Chnreh, to be treated as she pleased.
therefore, the fear of immediate death was remoy^
•d, I renounced all thoughts of communicating ii^
substance of the facts in this Yolnme. It '
•d, however, that my danger was not
was soon seized with very alarming i
then my desire to disclose my story re?iyed*

I had before had an opportunity to speak in prij
Tate with the chaplain ; but, as it was at a tiiD(
when I supposed myself out of danger, I had de
ferred for three days my proposed commnnicatioii
thinking that I might yet avoid it altogethe
When my symptoms, however, became more alamj
ing, I was anxious for Saturday to arrive, the dt|
which I had appointed; and when I had not
opportunity on that day which I desired, Ithonglj
it might be too late, I did not see him till Mo-^
day, when my prospects of surviving were ts
gloomy ; and I then informed him that I M
to communicate to him a few secrets, which w
likely otherwise to die with me. 1 then toldl

MABIA MONK.

209

thit while A nun, in the Convent of Montreal, I
hid witnessed the mnrder of » nnn ealled Saint
I^ds, and of at least one of the infants
whieh I have spoken of in this book. I added
lomefew circumstances, and I believe disclosed,
in general teima, some of the other crimes I knew
ofmtbatnmmery.^

My anticipations of death proved to be nnfonnd-
ed; for my health afterward improved, and had I
not made the confessions on that occasion, it is
teiy possible I never might have made them. I
however, afterward, felt more willing to listen to
instraction, and experienced friendly attentions
from some of the benevolent persona aronnd me
who, taking an interest in me on acconnt of my
darkened understanding, famished me with the
I Bible, and were ever ready to counsel me when I
1 desired it*

I loon began to believe that God might have in-
[tended that his creatures should leam his will by
reading his word, and taking upon them the free
lexeroise of their reason* and acting under respon-
[nbiU^tohim.

It is difficult for one who has never given way

snch arguments and influences as those to which

! had been exposed, to realize how hard it is to

aright after thinking wrong. The Scrip-

always affect me powerfully when I read

hut I feel that I have but just begun to

the great truths, in which I ought to have

early and thoroughly instructed. I realize,

gome degree, how it is, that the Scriptures reii-

*See Mr. rs itatement, page 101, " €k>nflrmatiou of
' la Monk'a Awful Di8cl08ure8."^£lK

! I

210

MARIA MONK.

d«r the people of the United Statei to stronely
opposed to laeh dootrinet m are taught in tiie
Blaok and the Congregational Nnnneries of Mon*
treal. The prlesta and nnns used often to declare*
that of all heretioa, the children from the United
States were the most 'di£9onlt to he eonyerted;
and it was thought a great triumph when one of
them was brought oyer to '* the true faitii.'* The
first passage of Scripture that made any gerioas
expression upon my mind, was the text on which
the ohaplain preached on the Sabbath ajfter my is.
troduction into the house — ^'^ Search tiie Sorio.
tures." ^

I made some hasty notes of the thoughts to
which it gave rise in my mind, and often recnned
to the subject Yet I sometimes questioned the
Justice of the views I began to entertab, and waa
ready to condemn myself for giving my mind an;
liberty to seek for information concerning the
foundation of my former faith.

CHAPTER Vn.

Proposition to go to Montreal and testify against the
Frtests— €k>mmencement of my Journey— Stop at Troy,
'Whitehall, Burlington, St Alban's, Plattsbuigb, and
8t John's— Anival at Montreal— Beflections on pan-
Ing the Nunneiy, fto.

About a fortnight after I had made thedisolosnrail
mentioned in the last chapter, Mr. Hoyt called atj
the Hospital to make inquiries about me. I wai
introduced to him by Mr. Tappin. After boom
conversationi he asked me if I would consent to

,-A

MARIA MONK.

211

liiil MoiiirMl» and gi?* 1117 •▼idenee Against th«
nriaitf and nnna before a eonrt I immediately
«prMMd mj willingnesa to do bo, on condition
that I fhonld be protected. It immediately oc-
eorred to me* that I might enter the Nnnnery a»
sight, and bfiog out the nnna in the oella, and
possibly Jane Ray, and that they would confirm
niy testimony, la a short time arrangements
were made for our journey. I was famished with
elothei; and although my strength waa aa yet but
ptrtiall/ restored, I set off in pretty good spirits.

Oar joomey was delayed for a little time, by
Mr. Hoyt's waiting to get a companion. He had
engaged a clergyman to accompany us, aa I under-
stood, who was prevented firom goinff by unex-
Keted buriness. We went to Troy m a steam-
it; ind, while there, I had scTeral interviews
with some gentlemen who were informed of my
history, and wished to see me. They appeared to
he deeply impressed with the importance of my
testimony; and on their recommendation it waa
detemdned that we should go to St Alban'a on
cor way to Montreal, to get a gentleman to accom-
pany ns, whose advice and assistance, as an ex-
perieneed lawyer, were thought to be desirable to
ins in prosecuting the plan we had in view : viz,
"he exposure of Sie crimes with which I was ac-
loainted.

We travelled from Troy to Whitehall in a canal
sket, because the easy motion was best adapted
my state of health. We met, on board, the
IT. Mr. Sprague, of New York, with whom Mr.
eyt WIS acquainted, and whom he tried to per-
to aeeompanyuB to Montreal From White*

212

MARIA MONK.

r ■

hall to Barlington we proceeded in a steamboat*
and there I was so mnoh indisposed, that it was
necessary to call a physician. After a little rest,
we set off in the stage for St. Alban's ; and on ar-
riving, found that Judge Turner was out of town.
We had to remain a day or two before he retarn-
ed ; and then he said it would be impossible for
him to accompany us. After some deliberation, it
was decided tiiat Mn Hunt should go to Montreal
with us> and that Judge Turner should follow and
join us there as soon as his health and business
would permit.*

We therefore crossed the lake by the ferry to
Plattsburg, where, after some delay, we embarked
in a steamboat, which took us to St John's. Mr.
Hunt, who had not reached the ferry early enough
to cross with us, had proceeded on to • * * and
there got on board ,the steamboat in the night
We went on to Laprairie with little delay, bat
finding that no boat was to cross the St Lawrence
at that place during the day, we had to take an-
other private carriage to Longueil, whence we
were rowed across to Montreal by three men, in i
small boat

I had felt quite bold and resolute when I first
consented to go to Montreal, and also daring m;
journey : but when I stepped on shore in the City,
I thought of the different scenes I had witnessed j
there, and of the risks I might run before Ishonldj
leave it. We got into a ctdeche, and rode
towards the hotel where we were to stop. WeJ

* ilr. Hunt was recommended as a highly respectabltj
lawyer ; to whose kindness, m well as to tliflt of ' '
Turner, I feel myself under obligations.

dasi

eami

reco]

wind

some

wond

werei

Iwer*

in the

hapsb

Iremf

thewb

iaken ]

doot of

Those j

m all I

again it

And<

upsrate
less nan

J Jhadiop

1 propose

i tAat even

I Journey t(

i in fnllA^ J

thoi

jeed. iti
Dot that

MARIA MONK.

213

teambo&t;
bat it ^aa
little test,
andonai-
it of \xim»
he xetam-
iot

iberatioii,it
to Montreal
4 follow and
md bnsinesa

the ferry to

V7e embarked

JoWs. Mr.

early enongh

* t.

in the nig
tie delay, but
St Lawrence
td to take an*
,, Tvhence^ft
;Yee men, in a

L whenlfiwt'

l80 during mj \
ore in the City,

I had vitn«88eM
before labouli
ind rode along
to stop. «•!

ngiayres.
ItoiUfltof

passed np St Paul's street; and, althongh it was
dnsk, I recognised every thing I had known. We
came at length to the nnnnery ; and then many
recollections crowded npon me. First I saw a
window from which I had sometimes looked at
gome of the distant houses in that street ; and I
wondered whether some of my old acquaintances
were employed as formerly. Bat I thought that if
I were once within those walls, I shonld soon be
in the cells for the remainder of my life, or per-
haps be condemned to something still more severe.
I remembered the murder of Saint Francis, and
the whole scene returned to me as if it had just
taken place; the appearance, language and con-
dnct of the persons most active in her destruction.
Those persons were now all near me, and would
use idl exertions they safely might, to get me
again into their power.

And certainly they had greater reason to be ex-
asperated against me, than against that poor help-
less nnn who had only expressed a wish to escape.*

* My gloomy feelings, however, did not always prevail.
I had hopes of obtaining evidence to prove my charges.
I proposed to my companions to be allowed to proceed
that evening to execute the plan I had formed when a
I Jonmey to Montreal had first been mentioned. This was,
to follow the physician into the nunnery, conceal myself
1 under the red calico sofa in the sitting-room, find my way
[into the cellar after all was still, release the nuns from
[their cells, and bring them out to confirm my testimony.
[I was aware that there were hazards of my not succeed-
ing, and that I must forfeit my life if detected— but I was
iesperate ; and feeling as if I could not long live in Mon-
'^. thought I might as well die one way as another.
ad that I had better die in the performance of a good
need. I thought of attempting to bring out Jane Ray-
bat that seemed quite out of the question, as an old nun

i!P"'!"

214

MABIA MONK.

When I found myself safely In Goodenongh'a
hotel, in a retired room, and began to think alone
the most gloomy apprehensions filled my mind. I
could not eat, I had no appetite, and I did not
sleep all night. Every painful scene I had ever
passed through, seemed to return to my mind; and
such was my agitation, I could fix my thonghts
upon nothing particular. I had left New York
when the state of my health was far from beinc
established ; and my strength, as may be pr&
sumed, was now much reduced by the fatigae of
travelling. I shall be able to give but a faint Mea
of the feelings with which I passed that night, but
must leave it to the imagination of my readers.
Now once more in the neighbourhood of the con-
vent, and surrounded by the nuns and priests,
of whose conduct I had made the first disclosnres
ever known, surrounded by thousands of persons de-
voted to them, and ready to proceed to any outrage,
as I feared, whenever their interference might be de-
sired, there was abundant reason for my nneasi-
nes8.

is commonly engaged in cleaning a oommunlty.room
through which I should have to pass ; andhow couldl hope
to get into and out of the sleeping-room unobserved? I
could not even determine that the imprisoned mm
would follow me out— for they might be afraid to trust
me. However I determined to try, and, presuming my
companions had all along understood and approved my
plan, told them I was ready to go at once. I was cha-
grined and mortified more than 1 can express, when they
objected, and almost refused to permit me. I hisisted,
and urged the importance of the step— but they repre-
sented its extreme rashness. This conduct of theirs, for
a time, diminished my confidence in them,
every body else has approved of it.

MABIA MONK.

215

I now began to realise that I had some attach-
ment to life remaining. When I consented to
Tisit the city, and famish the evidence necessary
(o lay open the iniquity of the convent, I had felt,
inameasare, indifferent to life; bat now, when
torture and death seemed at hand, I shrank from
it For myself, life conld not be said to be of
mnch ?alne. How oonld I be happy with sach
things to reflect apon as I had passed throngh f
gnd how coold I enter society with gratification?
Bat my infant I coald not abandon, for who woald
care for it if its mother died ?

I was left idonein the morning by the gentlemen
who had accompanied me, as they went to take
immediate measares to open the intended investi-
gation. Being alone, I tiioaght of my own posi-
tion m every point of view, until I became moro
agitated than ever. I tried to think what persons
I might safely apply to as friends; and, though
still nndecided what to do, I arose, thinking it
would be unsafe to remain any longer exposed, as

I imagined myself, to be known and seized by my
enemies.

I went from the hotel*, hurried along, feeling
18 if I were on my way to some asylum, and think-
ing I would first go to the house where I had sev-

*It occnrred to me. that I might have heen seen
[byBomepersonon landing, who might recognize me if

I I appeared in the streets in the same dress ; and I xe-
qaestedoneof the female servants to lend me some of
ben. I obtained a hat and shawl fM>m her, with which
Heft the house. When I found myself in Notre Dame
[itnet. I felt the utmost indecision what to do, and the
Ithougbt of my friendless condition almost overpowered

•(•iiiJ

rnr^

216

MARIA MONK.

eral Urnes previously found a temporary refuge. T
did not stop to reflect that the woman was a de-
voted Catholic and friend to the Superior; bat
thought only of her kindness to me on former oe.
casions, and hastened along Notre Dame street. Bat
I was approaching the Seminary ; and a resohtion
was suddenly formed to go and ask the pardon and
intercession of the Superior. Then the character
of Bishop Lartique seemed to present an impossi.
ble obstacle ; and the disagreeable aspect and harsh
voice of the man, as I recalled him, struck me with
horror. I recollected him as I had known him
when engaged in scenes concealed fro*n the eye of
the world. The thought of him made me decide
not to enter the Seminary. I hurried, therefore
by the door ; and the great church being at handl
my next thought was to enter there. I reached
the steps, walked in, dipped my finger into the
holy water, crossed myself, turned to the first
image I saw, which was that of Saint Magdalen,
threw myself upon my knees, and began to repeat
pfayers with the utmost fervour. I am certain
that I never felt a greater desire to find relief from
any of the Saints ; but my agitation hardly seem-
ed to subside during my exercise, which continued,
perhaps, a quarter of an hour or more. I tl
rose from my knees, and placed myself under
protection of St. Magdalen and St. Peter by
words: "J* me met$ sous voire protection "-(I
place myself under your protection) ; and added,
** Saints Marie, mere du hon pasteur, prie pm
ffioi'*— (Holy Mary, mother of tiie good shepheid,
pray for me.)
I then resolved to call once more at the boose

IIAKIA MONK.

217

where I bad found a retreat after my escape from
the Donneryy and proceeded along the streets iu
that direction. On my way, I had to pass a shop
kept by a woman* I formerly had an acquaintance
with. She happened to see me passing, and im-
mediately said, ** Maria, is that yon 7 Come in."

I entered, and she soon proposed to me to let
her go and tell my mother that I had returned to
theeity. To this I objected. I went with her,
however, to the house of one of her acquaintances
seftr by, where I remained some time, during which
she went to my mother's and came with a request
from ber, tiiat I would have an interview with her,
proposing to come up and see me, and saying that
ghe had something very particular to say to me.
What this was, I could not with any certainty con-
jeotare. I bad my suspicions that it might be
lomething from tiie priests, designed to get me
[hack into their pow^r, or, at least, to suppress my
istimony.

I felt an extreme repugnance to seeing mymo-

er, and in the distressing state of apprehension

id oneertainty in which I was, could determine

I noting, except to avoid her. I therefore soon

ifttiie bouse, and walked on without any particu-

ohjeot The weather was then very unplea-

it, and it was raining incessantly. To this I

as very indifferent, and walked on till I had got

irongh the suburbs, and found myself beyond the

indndllB. Then I returned, and passed back

roogh the city, still not recognized by anybody.

I once saw one of my brothers, unless I was

ich mistaken, and thought he knew me. If it

* This was Mrs. Tarbert

, ■iii'

■ i I

>*f

ttCfti

ill

■M

218

MARIA MONK.

was he, I am eonfident he avoided me, end thik
was my belief at the time, as he went into the yaid
with the appearance of much agitation. I oofitina.
ed to walk np and down most of the day, fearfol
of stopping anywhere, lest I should be recognized
by my enemies, or betrayed into their power. I
felt all the distress of a feeble, terrified womui, k
need of protection, and, as I thoaght, withoat i
friend in whom I could safely confide. It distress-
ed me extremely to think of my poor babe; and I
had now been so long absent from it, as necessari*
ly to suffer much inconyenience.

I recollected to have been told, in the New York I
Hospital, that laudanum would relieve distress I
both bodily^ and mental, by a woman who
me to make* trial of it In my despair, I re{
to make an experiment with it, and entering an]
apothecary's sho^, asked for some. The apothe-j
caxy refused to give me any ; but an old man whol
was there told me to come in, inquired when ll
bad been, and what was the matter wi& me, see*]
ing that I was quite wet through. I let him knowj
that I had an infant, and on his urging me to tell
more, I told him where my mother lived. Hd
went out, and soon after returned, accompanied b|
my mother, who told me she had my child
home, and pressed me to go to her house and
it, saying she would not insist on my enteri
but would bring it out to me.

I consented to accompany her ; but on reachiii
the door, she began to urge me to go in, sayi
should not be known to the rest of the family, ba
might stay there in perfect privacy. I was nd
wed not to eow^ly with this request, and resistedi

MABU MONK.

219

hir tntreaties, though she oontinned to urge me for
I long time, perhaps half an hoar. At length she
wantmi end I walked away, in a state no less des-

led ihe parade-ground, unnoticed, I believe, by any-
bodTi exeept one man, who asked where I was go-
[iDg, bat to whom I gave no answer. I had told
jiDTmoUier, before she left me, that she might find
jme in the parade-ground. There I stopped, in a
irt of the open ^und where there was no pro-
ibilify of my bemg observed, and stood thinking
( fhe many distrossing things which harassed
lie; snffBring, indeed, from exposure |o wet and
oldybatindmerent to them as evils of mere tri-
Qg importance, and expecting that death would
on ease me of my present sufferings. I had
koped that my mother would bring my babe to me
Sere; bat as it was growing late, I gave np all
speotatioxiB of seeing her.

At length she came, accompanied by Mr. Hoyt,

^ho, as I afterwards learnt, had called on her

er my leaving the hotel, and at her request, had

ntrosted my child to her care. Calling again

r I had left her house, she had informed him

she now knew where I was, and consented to

i him to the spot I was hardly able to speak

f to walk, in consequence of the hardships I had

}eigone ; but being taken to a small inn, and put

ler fhe care of several women, I was made oom-

ble with a change of clothes and a warm bed.

■^1

220

MABIA UOVK.

CHAPTER VIIL

Aeceiyed into a hospitable family— nuctQatlngfeelinm.
Visits from severa) persons— Father Phelan's declaJr

tions against me in his church— Interviews with a i
Journeyman Carpenter— Arguments with him.

In the morning I received an invitation to go to
the honse of a respectable Protestant, an old in.
habitant of the city, who had been informed of my
situation ; and alUiongh I felt hardly able to mo?e
I proceeded thither in a carriage, and was received
with a degree of kindness, and treated with sncli
care, that I mast ever retain a lively gratitude to-
wards the family.

On Saturday I had a visit from Doctor Bobert*
son, to whose honse I had been taken soon after m;
rescue from drowning. He pat a few
me, and soon withdrew.

On Monday, after the close of mass, a Cani
man came in, and entered into conversation wii
the master of the house in an adjoining room. Hi
was, as I understood, a journeyman carpenter, am
a Catholic, and having beard that a fugitive ni
was somewhere in the city, began to speak on tbi
subject in French. I was soon informed
Fattier Fhelan had just addressed his congregatii
witti much apparent excitement about myself;
thus the carpenter had received his informatio]
Father Phelan's words, according to what I hi
said by numerous witnesses, at different timi
must have been much like the following:—

** There is a certain nun now in this city, wl
has left our faith, and joined the Protestants.
has a child, of which she is ready to swear I

MARIA MONK.

221

fbe father. She would be glad in this way to take
iway my 8^^° ^^ ^^' ^ ^ knew where to find
tier I would pnt her in prison. I mention this to
Mtfd yoa against being deceived by what she may
uy. The devil has snch a hold npon peoj^le now-
a-dsyit that there is danger that some might be-
lieye her story."

Before he conclnded his speech, as was declared,

I he burst into tears, and appeared to be quite over-

eome. When the congregation had been dismis-

I led, i nomber of them came round him, and he told

Lome of them that I was Antichrist ; I was not a

[human being, as he was convinced, but an evil

spirit, who had got among the Catholics, and be-

[ing admitted into the nunnery, where I had learnt

the rales so that I could repeat them. My appear-

iDce, he declared, was a fulfilment of prophecy, as

Antichrist is foretold to be coming, in order to

Itreak down, if possible, the Catholic religion.

The journeyman carpenter had entered the

onse where I lodged under these impressions,

d had conversed some time on the subject, with<f

it any suspicion that I was near. After he had

iled ^((ainst me with such violence, as I after-

aids learned, the master of the house informed

that he knew something of the nun, and men*

ioned that she charged the priests of the Semin-

with crimes of an awftd character; in reply

which the carpenter expressed the greatest dis-

liet ,

**Ton can satisfy yourself,*' said the master of
16 house, *'if you will take the trouble to step up

, for she lives in my family.'*
'I see her 1" he exclaimed*-*' No, I would not

222

MABIA MONK.

see the wretched ereatare for any thing. I wonder
yon are not afraid to have her in your house «.
She will bewitch yon alL— The evil spirit V*

After some persnasion, however, he came into
the room where I was sitting, bat looked at me
with every appearance of dread and curiosity: ui)
his exclamations, and subsequent conversation in
Canadian French, were very ludicrous.

••Eh bin,** he began on first seeing me, '^o'est
ici la malheureuse V* (Well, is this the poor crea-
ture ?^ But he stood at a distance, and looked at
me with curiosity and evident fear. I asked him
to sit down, and tried to make him feel at his ease
by speaking in a mild and pleasant tone. Heeoon
became so far master of himself, as to enter into
conversation.

** I understood," said be, ** that she has said veiy
hard things against the priests. How can that be
true f *' '* I can easily convince you," said I, " that j
they do what they ought not, and commit crimes i
of the kind I complfon of. You are married, I
■uppo&£»iP" He assented. **Tou confessed, I
presume, on the morning of your wedding-day?"
He acknowledged that he did. ** Then did not the |
priest tell yon at confession, that he had had m*
tercourse with your intended bride, but that it wail
for her sanctification, and that you must never le-j
proach her with it?"

This question instantly excited him, bat he i
not hesitate a moment to answer it. ** Tes," i8<j
plied he, *' and that looks black enough." I hadl
put the question to him, because I knew the piae*!
tice to wnioh I alluded had prevailed at St. Denitj
while I was there, and believed it to be univergil,{

MARIA MONK.

223

or it least tery common in all the Catholic pariaL«c
of Canada. I thought I had reason to presv^^ne
that eTory Catholic, married in Canada, had had
such ezpericnoe, and that an allasion to the con-
dnot of the priest, in this particular, must compel
in? of them to admit that my declarations were far
from being incredible. This was the effect on the
Imind of the simple mechanic, and from that mo-
ment he made no more serions questions concern-
ing my tnilh and sincerity during that interview.
I Farther conversation ensued, in the course of
lihioh I expressed the willingness which I have
Dften declared, to go into the convent and point
Dut things which would confirm, to any doubting
erson, the trnUi of my heaviest accusations against
^e priests and nuns. At length he withdrew, and
[terwitfd entered, saying, that he had been to the
onyent to make inquiries concerning me. He as-
ms that he had been told that, although I
onoe belonged to the nunnery, I was called
Jacques, and not St. Eustace; and that now
^ey wonld not own or recognize me. Then he
Bgan to cnrse me, but yet sat down, as if disposed
or further conversation. It seemed as if he was
Footed by the most contrary feelings, and in rapid
leeeBsion. One of the things he said, was to per-
me to leave Montreal. '* I advise you," said
\, "to go away to-morrow." I replied, that I
I in no baste, and might stay a month longer.
Chen he fell to cursing me once more ; but the
it moment broke out against the prieata, calling
all the names he could think of. Etia pas-
i became so high against them, that he soon
to mb himself , as the low Canadians, who

;i''i

224

MARIA MONK.

are apt to be Tery passionate, sometttnes do to
oalm their feelings, when they are excited to a
painfal degree. Alter thia explosion he again be-
came quite tranqoil, and taming to me, in a !mk
and fnendly manner, said, ** I will help yon jq
your measures against the priests ; bnt tell me
first— y on are going to print a book, are yon not f"
'* No," said I, *' I haye no thoughts of that'*

Then he left the house again, and soon retnrn-
ed, saying, be had been at the Seminary, and seen
a person who had known me in the nunnery, and
aaid I had been only a noyioe, and that he wonld
not acknowledge me now. I sent back word b?
him, that I would show one spot in the nnnneij
that would proTC I spoke the truth. Thus he con.
tinned to go and return several times, sayiog
something of the kind every time, until I beca
tired of lum. He was so much enraged once
twice during some of the interviews, that I fell
somewhat alarmed ; and some of the family h
him swearing as he went down stairs : ** Ah,8aci
—that is too black I"

He came at last, dressed up like a gentle
and told me he was ready to wait on me to
nunnery. I expressed my surprise that he
expect me to go with him alone, and told him I hi
never thought of going without some protectoi
still assuring him, that, with any person to seen
my return, I would cheerfully go all over the nni
nery, and show sufficient evidence of the tratb
what I alleged.

My feelings continued to vary : I was sometin
fearful, and sometimes so courageous as to tbii
seriously of going into the Recolet church di

MABU MONK.

225

man with my ehild In my arms, and calling npon
^hepriMtto own it And this I am confident I
ihonld have done, bat for the persnasiona need to
prevent me.*

CHAPTER IX.

i milkman— An Irishwoman— Difficulty of having my
j^davit taken— Legal ohjeotion to it when taken.

AvoTHBB person who expressed a desire to see
me was an Irish milkman. He had heard, what
had seemed to be pretty generally reported, that I
blamed none but the Irish priests. He pnt the
on, whether it was a fact that I accused no-
1^7 bat Father Phelon. I told him it was not
so, and this pleased him bo well, that he told me,
U I would stay in Montreal, I should have milk
for myself and child as long as I lived. It is weU
[known that strong antipathies have long existed
[between jc reuch and Irish Catholics in that city.
The next day the poor Irishman retnrned, bat
a very different state of mind. He was present at
Bhueh in the morning, he said, when Father
Chelan told the congregation that the nnn of
rhom he had spoken before, had gone to oonrt
id accused him ; and that he, by 5ie power he
possessed, had strnck her powerless as she stood
lefore the jndge, so that she snnk helpless on the
|oor. He expressed, by the motion of his hands,

^* I did not make up my mind (so far as I remember),
ablidy to proclaim who was the father of my child, un-
nnquired to do so, until I learned that Father Phelan

Id denied it.

226

MARIA MONK.

the nnresisting manner in which she had gnnk
under the mysterions influence, and declared that
she would have died on fhe spot, but that he had
chosen to keep her alive that she might retract her
false accusation. This, he said she did, most
humbly, before the court, acknowledging that she
bad been paid a hundred pounds as a bribe.

The first words of the poor milkman, on revisit-
ing me, therefore, were like these: *< That's to
show you what power the priest has ! Didn't he
give it you in the court 7 It is to be hoped yoa
will leave the city now.*' He then stated what he
had heard Father Fhelan say, and expressed his
entire conviction of its truth, and the extreme joy
he felt on discovering, as he supposed he had,
that his own priest was innocent, and had '
such a triumph over me.

A talkative Irishwoman also made her
ance, among those who called at the house,' and
urged for permission to see me. Said she, "I
have heard dreadful things are told by a nnn yon
have here, against the priests ; and I have come
to convince myself of the truth. I want to see the
nun you have got in your house." When inform-
ed that I was unwell, and not inclined at present
to see any more strangers, she still showed much
disposition to obtain an interview. ** Well, aint it
too bad,'* she asked, ** that there should be any
reason for people to say such things against the
priests?" At length she obtained admittance to
the room where I was, entered with eagerness, and
approached me.

*<Arrah,'* she exclaimed, '*God bleis yon-ii
this you? Now sit down, and let me see the

MARIA MONK.

227

child. And it is Father Fhelan's, God bless
you f Bat they say yon tell about murders ; and
I want to Imow if they are all committed by the
Irish prieBts." " Oh no," replied I, «« by no
meanB?' " Then God bless you," said she. " If
Toa will live in Montreal, you shall never want. I
mil see that neither yon nor your child ever want,
for patting part of tiie blame upon the French
priests. I am going to Father Phelan, and I shall
tell him about it. But they say you are an eyil
spirit I want to know whether it is so or not"
<» Come here," said I, ** feel me, and satisfy your-
self. Besides, did yon ever hear of an evU spirit
having a child."

I heard from those about me, that there was
great difficulty in finding a magistrate willing to
take my affidavit. I am perfectly satisfied that
[this was owing to the influence of the priests to
pieyentmy accusations against them from being
[macle public. One eyening, a lawyer who had
[been employed for the purpose, accompanied me
a French justice witii an affidavit ready pre-
led in English for his signature, and informed
^im that he wished him to administer to me the
)ath. Without any apparent suspicion of me, the
le said, *' Have yon heard of the nun who ran
i^way from the convent, and has come back to the
{[ity, to bear witness against the priests ?*' ** No
latter about that now," replied the lawyer hastily i
* I have no time to talk with you— will yon take
luB person's oath now or not ?" He could not
Md a word of the document, because it was not in
fo own language, and soon placed his signature
ithe bottom. It proved however, that we had

"ft

:'J

828

Wlbia. monk.

gamed nothing by this step, for the lawyer after*
ward informed us, that the laws required the affi*
davit of a nnn and a minor to be taken before a
superior magistrate,

CHAPTER X.

Interview wlth*the Attorney General of the Province*
Attempt to abduct me— More interviews— A mob ex.
cited against me— Protected by two soldiers— Convinced
that an investigation of my charges could not be ob-
tained—Departure firom MontreaL— dosing reflections.

Thosb who had advised to the course to be pnr-
snedy had agreed to lay the subject before the
highest authorities. They soon came to the con-
viction that it would be in vain to look for anjf:-
your from the Governor, and resolved to lay it be*
fore the Attorney General as soon as he sbenid
return from Quebec. After waiting for some time
he returned ; and I was informed, in a few days
that he had appointed an interview on the follow- 1
ing morning. I went at the time with a gentle- j
man of the city, to the house of Mr. Grant, a
tinguished lawyer. In a short time a servant in-j
vited us to walk upstairs, and we went; but after J
I had entered * mmII room at the end of a parlonr,]
the door was shut behind me by Mr. Ogden,
Attorney GenexaL A chair wad given me, wbidil
was placed with the back towards a bookcase, at{
which a man was standing, apparently looking i
the books : and besides the two persons I
mentioned, there was but one more in the room/
Mr. Grant, the master of the house. Of the k
* Unless another was concealed— as I suspected.

MABIA MONK.

229

part of the interview I shall notpartienlarlj speak.
The two legal gentlemen at length began a mock
examination of me, in which they seemed to me to
be actuated more by a cariosity no way commend-
able, than a sincere desire to discover the truth,
writing down a few of my answers. In this, how-
ever, the person behind me took no active part.
One of the questions pat to me was, '* What are
the colours of the carpet in the Superior's room V*
I told what they were, when they tamed to him,
and inquired whether I had told the trath. He
answered only by a short grunt of assent, as if
afraid to speak, or even to utter a natural tone ;
and at the same time by his hastiness, showed that
he was displeased that my answer was correct I
was asked to describe a particular man I had seen
in the nunnery, and did so. My examiner turned
partly round with some remark or question which
was answered in a similar spirit. I turned and
looked at the stranger, who was evidently skulk-
ing to avoid my seeing him, and yet listening to
every word that was said. I saw enough in his
appearance to become pretty well satisfied that I
had seen him before ; and something in his form
or attitude reminded me strongly of the person
whose name had been mentioned. I was then re-
qaested to repeat some of the prayers ased in the
niumery, and repeated part of the office of the
Virgin, and some others. -^'

At length, after I had been in the little room, as
eoold judge, nearly an hour, I was informed tiiat
6 examination had been satisfactory, and that I
igktgo.
I then returned home i but no further step w»s

■}

IjllllrJ

230

MARIA MONK.

taken by the Attorney General, and he refused as
I nnderstood, to retnm my affidavit, which had
been left in his hands to act npon.

Besides the persons I have mentioned, I had in.
terviews with nnmbers of others. I learnt from
some, that Father Phelan addressed his congrega-
tion a second time concerning me, and expressly
forbade them to speak to me if they should have an
opportunity, on pain of excommunication. It was
also said, that he prayed for the family I lived
with, that they might be converted.

I repeated to several different persons my will.
ingness to go into the nunnery, and point out mi-
ble evidences of the truth of my statements; and
when I was told by one man, who said he had been
to the priests, that I had better leave the city, or
I would be clapped into prison, I made up my mind
that I should like to be imprisoned a little while,
because then, I thought, I could not be refused a
public examination.

Some Canadians were present one day, when the
mistress of the house repeated, in my presence,
(half I was ready to go into the nunnery if protect-
edy fuid, if I did not convince others of the troth of
my assertions, that I would consent to be horned.

'* O yes, I dare say,'* replied one of the men-
<« the devil would take her off,— she knows he
would. He would take care of her— we should
never be able to get her — the evil spirit."

A woman present said—*' I could light the fin
to bum yon, mysell"

A woman of Montreal, who has a nieoe in the
nunnery, on hearing of what I declared ahont it,

MABIA HONK.

231

said that if it was trne she would help to tear it

down.

Among those who came to see me» nnmberB
were at first as violent as any I have mentioned,
but after a little conversation, became mild and
calm. I have heard persons declare, that it wonld
be no barm to kill me, as I had an evil spirit.

One woman told me, that she had seen Father
Phelan in the street, talking with a man, to whom
he said, that the people were coming to tear down
the bonse in which I stayed, intending afterward
to set fire to it in the cellar. This story gave me
no serions alarm, for Ithonght I could see through
it evidence of an intention to frighten me, and
make me leave the city.*

I was mider great apprehensions, however, one
day, in conseqnence of an accidental discovery of
a pl%n bdd to take me off by force. I had stepped
into the cellar to get an ironholder, when I heard
the voices of persons in the street above, and re-
cognised those of my mother and the Irishwoman
her friend. There was another woman with them.

''Ton go in and lay hold of her," said one voice.

** No, yon are her mother— yon go in and bring
her out--we will help yon."

I was almost overcome with dread of falling in*
to their hands, believing that they wonld delivei

* I felt very confident, from some clroomBtanoes, that
this woman nad been sent to bring such a atoiy by Fa-
ther Phelan ; and such evidence of his timidity rather
emboldened me. I was in another room when sne came,
and heard her talking en and abusing me ; then comina
out, I said, " How dare you say I do not speak the truthT
"God bleai you," said she, "sit down and tell me aU. *

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MARIA MONK.

mo up to the Superior. Hastening into a room I
got behind a bed, told the lady of the house the
cause of my fear, and calling to a little girl to bring
me my child, I stood in the state of violent agita-
tion. Expecting them in the house every iustant
and fearing my infant might cry, and lead them to
the place A my concealment, I put my hand upon
its mouth to keep it quiet.

It was thought desirable to get the testimony
of the mistress of the house where I spent the
night, after my escape from the nunnery, as one
means of substantiating my story. I had been
there the day before my visit to the house of Mr.
Grant, accompanied by a friend, and on my first
inquiring of her about my nunnery dress, she said
she had carried it to the Superior ; speaking with
haste, as if she apprehended I had some object
Tory different from what I actually had. It now
being thought best to summon her as a witness be-
fore a magistrate, and not knowing her whole
name, we set off again towards her house to make
inquiry.

On our way we had to pass behind the parado. I
suddenly heard an outcry from a little gidlery in
the rear of a house which fronts anotiier way,
which drew my attention. ** There's the nnn,
there's the nun r* exclaimed a female, after twice
dapping her hands smartly together, " There's tiie
nun, there's the nun."

I looked np, and whom should I see but the
Irishwoman, who had taken so active a part, on
several oecasions, in my affairs, on account of her
friendship for my mother — the same who had ac*
companied me to Longeuil in a boat, when I set

MARIA MONK.

238

oat for New Tork, after making arrangements for
my journey. She now behaved as if exasperated
againBt me to the utmost; having, as I had no
donbt, learnt the object of my ]onmey to Montreal
since I had last spoken with her, and having all
her Catholio prejudices excited. She screamed
oat: <' There's the nnn that's come to swear
our dear Father Fhelan. Arrah, lay hold,

lay hold upon her ! Catch her, kill her, pull her
to pieces."

And so saying she hurried down to the street,
while a number of women, children, and some men,
came ronning out, and pursued after me. I imme-
diately took to flight, for I did not know what they
might do; and she, with the rest, pursued us, un-
til we reached two soldiers, whom we called up-
on to protect us. They showed a readiness to do
80 ; and when tiiey learnt that we were merely go-
ing to a house beyond, and intended to return
I peaceably, consented to accompany us. The crowd,
[which might rather be called a mob, thought pro-
I per not to offer us any violence in the presence of
the soldiers, and after following us a litUe distance,
[began to drop off, until all had disappeared. One
of the soldiers, however, soon after remarked, that
[he observed a man following us, wh .m he had seen
[in the crowd, and proposed that instead of both of
km going before us, one should walk behind, to
lard against any design he might have. This
m done ; and we proceeded to a house near the
le where I had found a refuge, and after obtain-
ig the information we sought, returned, still

led by the soldiers.
All oar labour in this case, however, pteved un-

I ill

•l

111

il!

234

MARIA MONK.

ayailing ; for we were unable to get the woman to
appear in oonrt

At length it was fonnd imjpossible to induce the
magistrateB to do any thing in the case ; and ar-
rangements were made for my return to New York;
While in the ferry-boat crossing from Montreal to
Laprairie, I happened to be standing near two lit*
tie girls, when I overheard the following conversa*
tion.

** Why do yon leave Montreal so soon 7**

** I had gone to spend a week or two; bat I
heard that Antichrist was in the city, and was
afraid to be there. So I am going right home. I
would not be in Montreal while Antichrist is there.
He has oome to destroy the Catholio religion.''

I felt qnite happy when I fonnd myself once
more safe in New York ; and it has only been since
my return from Montreal, and the conviction I had
there formed, that it was in vain for me to attempt
to get a fair investigation into the Hotel Diea
Nunnery, that I seriously thought of publishing i
book.

CHAPTER XL

Recollection of several things which happened at diffeN
ent periods— BecoFds made by me of my " disclosures"
—My first opinion of Miss Aeed's book—Intention to {
confess while in the Bellevue Asylum— Interviev witb
a New York lady about to become a nun.

Since the publication of my first edition, I haye
had different things brought to my memory, which
I had forgotten while reviewing in it tiie past]
scenes of my life. Some of these have

MABIA MONK.

285

tbemseWes to me while meditating alone, by day
Qjlj night; and others have been bronght to
mind by conversing with others. I have seen a
number of my former acquaintances, and in my
interviews with them, my memory has often been
refreshed on one subject or another. During a
eoDTersation i had in March last, with Mr. John
Hilliker of New York, who by so kindly persisting
in taking me from my exposed retreat, saved my
life as I believe, and introduced me to the Alms-
hoase, he recalled to my mind a paper which I
held in my hand when he found me in a field. I
did not mention that paper in my Sequel, because
I did not think of it. He mentions, in his affida-
ntytbat I refused to let him see it, and tore it in
pieces, when I found he was resolved to remove
me. I had made up my mind that I was soon to
die. Indeed, although I have felt unwilling to
dedare it heretofore, my intention had been to die
by starvation, in the lonely place where I had
taken my abode. Sometimes this resolution fail-
ed me for a time, and I would eat, and even send
the littie boy who visited me, to buy a few cakes.
Sometimes, also, I thought of destroying my life
by otilier means; but still thinking it would have
some merit in the sight of God, to disclose the
worstoftiie crimes I had witnessed in the Nun-
[nery, I determined to leave behind me a record
iwUeh might be picked up after my death, when-
ever and however that event might come upon me.
[I therefore one day sent Tommy to buy me some pa-
[Mr; and, understanding I wanted to write, he
[noni^t me an inkstand and pen, as I believe from
'mother's house. I wrote a brief statement of

236

MARIA MONK.

facts apon the paper, and folded it, I belieye {q
the form of a letter, after signiug it, as I Uiiij]^
with my Christian name only, ** Maria.*' %]^
was the paper which Mr. Hilliker endeavoured to
ohtain, and wh2f)h I tore, to prevent it from beine
seen, when I tho/%ght death was not so near as r
had supposed. ^

The Sunday before the birth of my child I
again wrote, with similar feelings, and in a sirni.
Ifur st^le, and hid the jpaper. But I afterwaidi
took it again and burnt it.

While I was in the Asylum, a gentleman who
had Miss Beed's book, (** Six Months in a Con-
Tent,") read some passages in my presence, which
irritated me so much that I spoke to him with pas-
sion, and I fear almost insulted him. I had never
heard of such a person or such a book before, hot
I believed every thing I heard, because it corre-
sponded with my own experience, so far as it went;
but I thought, at that moment, that it waia wrong
to make known such things to the world, as it wu
calculated to injure the Church : in such an un-
settled state did my mind continue to be foracon-
sideitible time. It was perfectly evident to me,
however, that the institution where she was, most
be materially different from the Black Nnnneiy,
as it was far from being so close, or governed by
such strict rules. She also had been in it too
short a time to learn all ; and besides, being only:
a novice, it was Lnpossible that she should be foll/j
acquainted with m.any things which are eommnni<
cated only to nuns.

While I was in the Asylum, I had once a
up my mind to confess to Mr. Conroy, after receir*

MARIA MONK.

287

inff his invitationB and threatening messages, being
itroDgly urged by some of the Catholic women
iboat me. It happened, most fortunately for me,
{bat I was befriended and advised by an excellent
woman, Mrs. Neil, who took great pains to instruct
gnd influence me aright. When I had decided on
obeying the summons of the priest, Mrs. Neil
ciune in, and having ascertained my intention,
urged me to reflect, and iocpressed it upon my
mind, that I was responsible to God, and not to
man, for my conduct, and that his power and
aatbority over me were only pretended. I believe
I had then sometimes more confidence in priests
than in God Almighty. She assured me that I
had rights, and had friends there who would pro-
tect me. I then determined not to go to coi^es-

idon.
I have generally found it easier to convince

Catholics than Protestants of the truth of my story,

if they come to me with doubts or eyen unbelief.

Since the first appearance of my booir, I have re-
visits from a great number of persons in

eoQseqaence of what they had seen or heard of its
ntents; and among these have been a consider-
ile nomher of Catholics. While I am able to say
at I have had the satisfaction of removing all
labts from tiie minds of some Protestants whom
have seen, I must confess that in general I have
eived the greatest satisfaction from interviews
iih intelligent Catholics. The reason of this is,
at I know better how to treat the latter in argu-
enl Having been one myself, I know where
eie difficulties lie, how to appeed to their own
inds, and how to lead them to correct condu-

288

MABIA MONK.

■ions. Perhaps I ean best oonvey my meanintf to
my readers, by giving a brief aocount of some of
the interviews auaded to.

There is an interesting little girl whom I hare
repeatedly conversed wiu, (the daughter of an ig.
norant Catholic woman,) who has enjoyed some of
the advantages of insfaniction in the soriptorei,
and submits with extreme relnctance to the ceremo-
nies which her mother reqnires her to perfom, in
compliance with the requisitions of her priest
She believes my book, and she has reason for it
She has acknowledged to me, though with sbame
and relnctance, tha^ when compelled by her mo-
iher to confess to Father ****, in his priyite
room, he has sat with his arms around her, and
often kissed her, refusing money for the osual fee,
on the plea that he never requires pay for confess-
ing pretty girls. He told her the Virgin Maiy
would leave her if she told of it. His qnestioiu
are much the same as I have heard. All this I can
believe, and do believe. I need not say that I
tremble for her fate.

During the first week in March, 1886, 1 re-
ceived a visit at my lodgings in New York, from a
young woman, of a Protestant family in this city,
who had received a Bomau Catholio education.
She called, as I understood, at the urgent fqai
of her mother, who was exceedingly distressed at |
her daughter's intention to enter a Canadian nan- j
nery.

Part of our interview was in private ; for sbei
requested me to retire with her a little time, when
we might be alone ; and I found her intention was,
by certain queries, to satisfy herself whether liud

IliJIIA MONK.

889

ererbaen • Boman Catholio. She inqnired if I

eoold tell any of the qaestioiui eommonly asked of

women hi the eonfesdon box ; and on my answer-

{og in the affinnative, she desired me to repeat

lome, whioh I did. This satisfied her on that

I point; and I soon became so far acquainted with

me state of her mind, as to perceive that she was

Iprepared to avoid the influence of every argument

mtX I conld use against the system to which she

[had become attached.

She oonfessed to me, that she had given five

^nndred dollars to the Cathedral, and a consider-

ble som to St Joseph's Church, and that she had

lecided on entering a nunnery in Canada. I in-

lured why she did not enter one in the United

States. To this she replied, that she had only one

kbjeetion; her Confessor, Father Pies, having

^d her that he would by no means recommend

lie latter, and greatly preferred the former, be-

iQse the priests had entire control over the Cana-

numeries, which they had not of those in the

ties. This, and some other parts of ourconver-

tion took place in the presence of other persons ;

ad on hearing this declaration of the pnest, the

kotive of which was to us so palpable, a lady pre-

pt langhed outright.

[While we were fJone, on her expressing a doubt

I the crimes I have charged upon the priests, I

|id,bnt you admit that they have said and done

eh and such things, (which I do not like to re-

») She signified assent Then, said I, how

1 joa pretend that any thing is too bad for them

iol I also said, you admit thai they have

ked jfoa iu the Confession box, whether ytm

mm.

240

IIARU. MONK.

•Ter wished to commit bestiality. She replied.
** Tea ; bat if we have not evil thoughts, theie^
no harm.*' ** Yon admit that they have treated
yon with great familiarity at confession V* She
replied, that she confessed to her priest while he
sat in a chair, and that he had ; ** but,*' said she
** yon know a priest is a holy man, and cannot sin.'*
And when I pressed her with another qaestion,
i^e.confessed that her priest had told her sheconid
not B(i^ sanctified without haying performed an act
CjO^anionly called criminal, and replied in a similar
moiBClier^

Sk^ was ashamed or afraid to assert her fall
faith in some of the doctrines she had been taught,
when I loudly and emphatically demanded of her,
whether she did indeed credit them. This wasj
the case with her in regard to the pardon of sinij
by priests, the ezistonce of purgatory, or a mid
place, Sbo. She spoke of these and other sabje
as if she believed in them : but when I said, «
you belieye it really and truly ?"— yon do?" i
invariably faltered and denied it.

She spoke of my *' Disclosures " as nntrne ; &ni
I got it out of her, that she had conversed wil
her priest about me at Confession, who assured In
that I was not myself, not Maria Monk, hut an evi
spirit, in short, the devil in the form of a womi
After considerable conversation, she admitted
my book was undoubtedly true ; but still she
fused to do, as I told her she ought after sayii
what she had, come out and be a Protestant.

She informed me that her confessor had a
desire to see me, and inqpred if 1 wonid consi
to an interview. I replied, that I would "'^

MAHIA KONK.

241

igtee to M6 him, in ihe presence of Dr. Brownlee, .
ISt not alone ; and she went away withont leaving
me any reason to hope that she had heen released
from the power of superstition^ or had any inten-
tion of gratifying her mother, who was so deeply
diitMssed at the prospect of her daughter's rain.

CHAPTER Xn.

jteconections of my Noviciate in the Hotel Dieu Nun-
nery—Miss Duranceau.

Whilb I was a novice, there was a young ladjr of
onr number from the Tannery,* named Angehqne
Dnnneean, with whom I was somewhat acquaint-
ed, ind of whom I had a favourable opinion. She
WIS about eighteen, and at the time of her entrance
^hidereiy appearance of good health. After she
jhid been there a considerable time, it might be
[iboiit seven months, (as I know she was not near
ihe period when she eonld make her general con«
lenion, that is, at the end of the first year,) I saw
[iier under droumstances which made a strong im-
non on my mind.
I had received a summons from the Superior to
id in the Novices' sick-room, with several
^er novices. When I entered, I found Fathers
mge and Benin reading a paper, and Miss Dur*
Dcean on a bed, with a look so peculiar as quite
ighock me. Her complexion was dark, and ot
iiumatiinl colour, her look strange, and she oc-
nonally started and conducted very singularly

* A. village a few miles flrom Montreal.

242

MARIA MONK.

indeed, fhongh she neyer spoke. Her whole ap-
pearanoe was each as to make me think she had
lost her reason, and almost terrified me. The
Superior informed us that she wanted as as wit.
nesses ; and the priests then eoming forward, pre-
sented the paper to Miss Dnrancean, and asked
her if she was willing to give all her property to
the ehnroh. She replied with a feeble motion of
the head and hody, and then, having a pen put i&.
to her hands, wrote her name to it without read^
ing it, and relapsed into apparent nnconscionsness. i
We were then requested to &dd onr signatures j
whieh being done, we withdrew, as we entered, I
believe, without the sick novice having had ml
knowledge of onr presence, or of her own actions.

A few hoors afterwards I was called to assist in
laying oat her corpse, which was the first intima^j
tion I had of her being dead. The uperior, my-
■elf, and one or two other novice?; . 1 iie T^holel
of this melancholy task to perform, Icuig the onlyl
persons admitted into the apartment where the
body lay. It was swelled very much. We pi
it in a coffin, and screwed on the cover alone.
account of the rapid change taking place in th^
corpse, it was buried about twenty-four hoa
after death.

Not long after tohe burial, two brothers of Mis
Doranceau came to the Convent, and were (
distressed when told that she was dead. The
complained of not being informed of her sickness]
but the Superior assured them that it was at tiij
urgent request of their sister, who was possesse
of so much humility, that she thought herself no
worthy of attracting the regard of any one,audod

MARIA MONK.

243

£t to be lamented even by her nearest friends.
oWhatwasshe/* she bad said, according to the
(ieelmtions made by the Saperior, ** what was she
{hit 8he shonld oanse pain to her family ?"

This was not the oidy occasion on which I was
mweai at the laying ont of the dead. I assisted
^ three other cases. Two of the snbjects died of
eonsnmption, or some similar disease; one of
whom was an old-country girl, and the other a
Mnaw.— 'The latter seemed to fall away from the
time when she came into the nunnery, nntil she
was reduced almost to a shadow. She left to the
Conyent a large amount of money.
Several stories were told us at different times, of
mms who had gone into a state of sanctity in the
ConTeni One, who had excited much attention
lod wonder by prophesying, was at length found
to be in such a condition, and was immediately re-
kued from the duty of observing the common
nleiof the Convent, as the Superior considered
her tntiiority over her as having in a manner
ceased.

It was affirmed that many priests had been taken
to heaven, body and soul, after death.
The following story I was told by some of the
nnns and tiie Superior while I was a novice, and it
made a considerable impression upon my mind.— >
oatechism one day, a dove appeared in the
im while the nuns were kneeling and engaged in
lyer. It addressed one of the nuns and the Su-
ior, not only in an audible Toice, but in a string
Freneh rhymea, which were repeated to me so
that I learnt them almost all by heart, and
itain several to this day.

244

MABIA MONK.

" Un grand honneur Je voiis confeie,
*' AuMi a vova, la Superieare."

These were the first two lines. In the

the dove informed the audience that in eight days
the spirit of the nnn should be raised to heaven to
Join its own, and that of other sonls in that blessed
place ; and spoke of the honour thus to be con-
ferred upon the nun, and on the Superior too, who
had had the training of one to such a i ude of
holiness.

When the day thus designated arrived, a nnm-
ber of priests assembled, with the Superior, to
witness her expected translation ; and while they
were all standing around her, she disappeared, her
body and soul being taken off together to heaven.
The windows had been previously fastened, yet
these offered no obstacle, and she was seen rising
upward like a column moving through the air.
The sweetest music, as I was assured, accompanied
her exit, and continued to sound the remainder of
the day, with such charming and irresistible effect.
that the usual occupations of the nuns were inter-
rupted, and all joined in and sang in concert

CHAPTER Xm

of Ann, the Scotch Novice— Letters of her lovep-
Tfie Superior's deception— Miss Fames— Ann's deter-
mination to leave the Ck>nvent— Means taken to per-
suade her to stay.

Tbbbs was a young girl, named Ann, who was
very stout and rather homely, but not of _'
mannerly though of a good disposition, BeventeeDJ
or eighteen years of age, to whom I took a '"

MARIA MONK.

245

_ was a novice with me, and the time of which
I am to speak, was not long after I returned from
St. Denis. The Superior also displayed a par-
tiidity for her, and I foond she was much in fa-
tovr of having her received as a nnn, if it could he
iccomplished. She was very handy at different
kmds of work | and, what I believe chiefly induced
me to legard her with kindness, she was a father-
less and motherless child. She had a beau in
town, who one day called to see her at the nun-
nery, when she was going to confession.

I was with the Superior at the time, who, on be-
ing infonned that the young man was there, and
of his errand, requested me to go into the parlour
with her, to meet him. He put into the Superior's
hands a parcel and three letters, requesting her to
giye them to Ann. She took them, with an ez-
piession of assent, and he withdrew. Just as he
had gone, Aon came hurrying into the parlour,
saying that some one had told her that the Supe-
rior had sent for her. The Superior rebuked her
sharply, and sent her back, without, however,
showmg her what she had promised to give her.
Ann said, that she had understood a young man
(mentioning her visitor^ had called to see her.
This the Superior domed, telling her never to
eome iHl she was wanted.

When Ann had gone, the Superior told me to go
with her to her room, which I did. She there
first made me promise never to tell of what she
was going to do, and then produced the letters and
package, and began to open them. One of the let-
ters, I remember, was folded in a smgnlar manner,
ind fastened with three seabu In the parcel was

246

MARIA MONK.

fonnd A miniature of the yonng man, a pair of ear
rings, a breast pin, and something else, what I
have now forgotten. The letters were addressed
to her by her lover, who advised her by all means
to leave the Convent He informed her that a
consin of hers, a tailor, had arrived from Scotland
who was in want of a housekeeper ; and urged her
to live with him, and never renoance the Protes-
tant religion in wluoh she had been bronght up.

I was surprised that the Superior should do
what I felt to be very wrong and despicable ; but
she represented it as perfectly justifiable on ac-
count of the good which she had in view.

I considered myself as bound to be particularly
obedient to the Superior, in order that I might
make my conduct correspond with the character
given of me to her, by Miss Bousquier, who, as I
have mentioned in the sequel of my first volume,
had shown me an evidence of her friendship by
recommending me to her, and becoming, in some
sense, responsible for my good conduct to induce
her to receive me back into the nunnery. This
was a strong reason for my complying with the
Superior's wish in the case of which I am speaking.

Since I have alluded here to the period of my
return to the convent, I may remark that the Sn- 1
perior took some pains to ascertain, by her own
inquiries, whether there was substantial reasoB
for reliance on the favourable opinion expressed to
her of me by Miss Bousquier. I recollect parties-
larly her inquiring of me whom I had conversed
with, while at St. Denity to persuade them to en-
ter the Black Nnnnef|riytotejdiss Bonsqueir.I
nndentoddy had ^^'''pjHp ^^ ^ ^ ^^^^^

"*,■•'-;.'■ .-■■m'^'^"

MARU MONK.

247

ny ittuhmont to Uie AM Dien, by making fa-
Tonrable representationB of it while with her en-
gaged in keeping school. To the Superior's inqni-
nes I replied, that I had urged little Gneroutte to
become a non. She was the daughter of Jean
Biehardt as he was familiarly called, to distinguish
him from a number of other men of nearly the
same name; for he had eztensiTO family eon-
nexions in tiiat place. He lived opposite Miss
Bonsquier, so tiiat I had had frequent opportuni-
ties to conyerse with his daughter.

Bat not to detain my readers longer on this di-
grefudon, I will return to my story and poor Ann,
the Scotch girl. Having received particular in-
itnictions from Uie Superior, I promised to endea-
Tonr to get into her confidence, for the purpose of
influencing her to take the veil, and to proceed in
lecordaDce witii the directions given me. The Su-
perior told me by no means to make any approaches
to her at once, nor indeed for some tuyift, lest she
diodd suspect our design; but to wait awhile,
nntil she could have no reason to think my move-
ments might have grown out of the circumstances
above mentioned : for Ann appeared to be unoom-.
monly penetrating, as the Superior remarked ; and
of course much caution was necessary in dealing
I with her. Some time subsequently, therefore, I
eumot tell exactly how long, i engaged in conver-
sation with her one day in Sie course of which she
nmarked that Miss Fams, a confidential friend of
hers, who had spent a short time in the nunnery
Isome time before, was soon coming back.

This Miss Fams had come in on trial, while I
i in the Convent, and I had often heard the Su-

248

MARIA MONK

Serlor say, that she must be separated from Ann
ecause they were so much together, and so often
breaking the rules. Ann now told me in oonfi.
dence, that her friend was coming back, not with
any real intention of staying, bnt only for the pQ^
pose of givins her some information f avonrable to
nerself, whi<m she had obtained. This she wished
to become fally possessed of before she would de-
cide whether to leave the Convent or not.

All this I oommanicated to the Superior, who
then began to look for Miss Fams* return, with a
determination to treat her with every appearance
of kindness. She often in the mean time, gave
me little delicaoies, with directions to share them
with Ann. Miss Fams soon presented herself for
Te-admission, and was admitted without any diffi.
oulty, not bemgreqnired even to change her dress.
Thisocoarred, as nearly as I oan recollect, aboat
aiz weeks after the afifair of intercepting Ann's
letters, mentioned a few pages back, and some-
where about the close of summer, or the
befloiming of autumn.

Being Slowed to do pretty much as they chose,
Ann and her friend were much together, and gen-
erallv en^^aged in deep conversation : so that, as I
the Superior deolare<( it was evident tiiey were
forming some plan for secret operations I tried
sevml times to get near and overhear what %
were talking about : but I could not learn any!
tfaiuff. The next day Miss Farns departed, 8ay*|
ing die never intended to return ; which offend-j
ed the Superior so much, that she said she wooldl
have the doom ihnt if die ever came again.

Tbe same evening Ann requested me to tellj

MARIA MONK.

249

Superior, that she wished to get
.iiA micht leave the Convent. I

her clothes, that
die might leave the ijonvent. 1 went to the Sn-
trior's room, where I found Father Benin sitting
OB the sofa talking with her. When they were in-
fonned of Ann's message, the Superior said, she
would let the girl go at once back to tho world,
and be given up to the devil. Benin argned a
good deal against this. The Superior replied,
^at she had set the old nuns at work, but without
gneeess } they had not been able to influence Ann
IB she desired ; and it was a shame to keep such a
oeitare within holy walls, to make the flock dis-
contented. At length she decided on the course
to pursue; and turning to me, said: take her up
stairs, give her her doUies, yet argue with her in
hYOor of remaining in the Convent, but at the
Bime time tell her, that I am indifierent about it,
ind care not whether she goes or stays.

I lecordingly returned to Ann, and telling her
ihit she might follow me up stairs and get her
led Sie way, and delivered them to her.
b obedience to my orders, I lost no time in repre-
lenting her intentions to depart from our holy resi-
lenoe as an insinuation of the devil ; and told her
at he was trying his best to draw her out into
e world, that he might secure her for himself. I
d her that he had a strong hold upon her, and
ought to use the greater exertions to resist his
ptations ; that the Superior thought it might
better on the whole if she departed, because
iorinflaence might be very injurious to others if she
yet Siat I felt a deep interest in her, and
ttot bear to have her perform her intention,
le I well knew that her throwii\g off the hQljr

250

MARIA MONK.

dresB that she ttien wore, to take her fonner out
would he the first step towards damnatioii. '

** Yea need not talk so to me," replied Ann
** yon have done the same yoorself." I told her
that if I had, I had lived to regret it, and was glad
to get back to the Convent again. After a while
an old nnn came up, called me aside, and said the
Superior wished me to continue talking with Ann*
and, in case I should prevail with her to remain to
make her go down and beg pardon for the scandal
she had caased by her conduct, and ask to betaken
back again into the flock of the good shepherd u
the Superior was often called.

Poor Ann at length began to listen to me ; and
I got her to repeat to me all that Miss Fame had
said to her during her late short visit to the non-
nery. The amount of it was, that if Ann would
come out at dusk, and go to a particular hooae,
would find her relations waiting for her, who
arrived from Scotland — they were, if I
not, her brother and cousin. Having prevailed
upon her to break her engagement to meet them,
I soon persuaded her to go down stairs as a peni*
tent, and there she humbly kneeled, and in the
usual manner kissed the feet of the Superior, and
all the novices, and begged and obtained a pen-
ance, which was to serve as an atonement for her
offence. This was, to fast three mornings, ask
forgiveness of all her companions on the sama
days, and perform acts of contrition.

That evening the Superior called me to tea is
her own room, when I told her aU that I hidj
learnt from the confession of Ann, who I knatj
was fasting at the time. When the Superior m

MARIA MONK.

251

derfltood the plan proposed by Miss Fams, she
spoke of her in rery seyere terms, end then eom«
iQMided me, saying that I ought to rejoice at hav-

ing fared a soul from hell, but ought to guard
igaiBBt pride, as I had accomplished what 1 had
ofidertakeu only by the help of the Virgin Mary.

Ijoi continued to behave as she had promised,
ind we heard nothing more of any attempt by her
friends to get her out of the nunnery. Not long
liter, however, she was taken sick, and I ascer-
tained, from observation and inquiry, that the cause
of it was her discontentment, as she complained
of loneliness. I felt compassion for her, and told
the Soperior that I thought she ought to be treat-
ed with more leniency. She said she would get
lome of the old nuns to talk with her a little more.

Ann was received, in due time, as a nun. I was
not present at the ceremony, but I afterwards met
with her, va(\ several times had a little conversa-
tion with her*

CHAPTER XIV.

Mi88 Bobs— Our early acquaintance— Her request.

ITbebe was a girl whom I knew from a child, a
lisB Boss, the recollection of whom gives me
leeppain: for I know too well that I have been

l&e oanse of great misfortunes to her. I remem-
er being wiUi her at di£ferent times in my early
ays. After our family removed to Montreal, and
cor residence in the Government House, we
^ften had calls from persons of our acquaintimoe,

259

MABIA MONK.

as many were fond of walking in the garden or
green, as we commonly called it. '

Such of my readers as hsTC yisited that oitv
will be. likely to remember the place of ora mi
dence : for tiie Government House, of which m?
mother is still the keeper, is of very large size: (I
have sometimes heard it spoken off as the molt
ancient in America.) It was said that the founda-
tion stones of that and the old French ohorohwere
laid on the same day, as recorded. The gateway
is of stone, and it is famished in a manner becom.
ing the residence of the Governor of the ^vinee.
The garden and green are of great extent, and pre'
sent fine walks and flowers ; and as the fonnei
overlooks the esplanade, to which it is adjoining,
it was a favonrite resort on Sunday afternoons
when the troops are on parade. '

Miss Ross, I recollect, one evening in partiea-
lar, paid me a visit with a Miss Rohinson; and we
amnsed ourselves together in the green. Her mo-
ther lived a little out of the city, near the Lachine
road. She was a Scotch lady, and possessed ai
large property. When Miss Ross grew ap, she be>{
came attached to a yonng man of my acqaaintanee,
and indeed a relation of my mother ; bat when ii
became known, she found her mother very mndil
opposed to her wishes.

While I was a novice in the Hotel Dien,
'Boss came in as one ; and we had frequent inl
"views together, as our acquaintance still continai
rand indeed we had always been friends. She
came informed of my design of taking the blaci
"veil— I presume I must have told her of it m;
and one.digr Ak» told me, that she had somel

MARIA MONE.

25^

the garden, or I ^^^^^

_ jght of beooming a nim, but still felt bat little
jiielinttion that way ; yet she reqaested me to do
htfthe f^Tonr to injform her how I was pleased
with that mode of life, after I should have been in
long enough to form an opinion. If I thought she
would be happy as a nnn, she desired I wonld
fnnUy infonn her ; and if not— as I was acquaint-
ed with her disposiUon^-that I would warn her
igtinst it We often eonversed on the subject
afterwards; and it was repeated, and plainly un-
deritood between us, that I was to tell her the ex«
lot troth, as she would probably be i;^uided entirely
by my opinion in the Ci'urse she wo id adopt.

I went through many pr^par^lory steps before
my admission, as I have mentioned in my first
Tolnme, took the veil, and passed thron^h a^yme of
the scenes which I have before spokei of, before I
ever particularly reverted to the ro 'j^iest of Miss
Row, 80 far as I now can rev<?Tr.ber. One *:hingt
however, I here stop to mention, which I omitted
to say hi my first volume, and which I might for
get hereafter, viz : — that soon after my a£ni8sion
IS a '* Beoeived,*' the Superior gave me the charge
of her room, that of the old nuns, and the adjoin*
oommmiity-room ; and thus kept me for about
monUis in a degree more separate from the
iher nuns, than I should otherwise have been,
brought me more into intercourse with the
laperior, and in the same proportion made some
ither nuns regard m^^ < ith jealousy : for some of
lem occasionally, in some way or other, would
dislike towards me. Perhaps this state

press

[things the mor^ iiisposed me to confide in the
pvpeiior.

254

MARIA MONK.

After I had been a nun lor some weeira, I cannot
tell exactly how long, I recollect that as I lay
nwake one night, I began to think of Miss Ross
and to recall the conyersations we had held to-'
geiher in the noyioes' apartment All at once it
occurred to me that I might probably do a great
benefit to myself, an honour to the nunnery and to
true religion, as well as save her, by inducing her
to take the black yell, especially as she had so
much property to add to the funds. At the same
time the tiiought presented itself to my mind that
by 80 doing I should gain a yery exalted place in
heayen for myself : for I had already heard a great
deal said, and had repeatedly read the same in our
book, thiU to bring a person into a Convent, was
one of the highest kinds of merit. I soon made
up my mind to communicate to the Superior all I
knew ; for although I questioned at once whether
it would not be shameful and sinful to betray the ;
eonfidence of my friend, this was easily got oyer,
by the thought of the vast benefits to result fron{
ii^ especially to hersell i

The next day I told one of the old nuns that I
wished to apeak to the Superior ; for as this was
eommdnly required, and nuns could not go into her
room without leave, I conformed to custom. I was
goon admitted, when I told her all Miss Boss had
said to me, and added, that I wished to get her to]
take the yeil. I apologized for my private con*
yersations. She said they were perfectly jastifii-i
ble. — I think I never saw the Superior expresi
more aatisfkction than she did on the receipt dl
thii intelligence. She appeared overjoyed; iii>|
tened to all I had to say with ifrmi attention, ndl

MARIA MONK

255

]jlg]ily appioyed of my proposition. When I in-
fonned h«t of Miss Boss's attachment to yonng
/ -^^ she replied that that might explain the
itate of her mind ; for the old nuns had for some
time gpoken of her depressed appearance, and she
had mentioned at confession that something lay
Twy heavy on her mind.

The Superior appeared from that moment to de-
Tote her whole attention to the consideration of the
Bnbject. She seemed for a time almost lost in
thought; and remarked to me, '* We must consider
ibis matter; we must consider the best way to
bring her into the nnnnery : for some persons are
balder to get ont of the devil's power ttian others.
After a little time she told me I should be sent to
lead the lectnre to the novices, and she wonld tell
tbe old nuns to allow me to converse with Miss
I Boss, which they would not let me do, as I well
knew, without her express orders, as it was con-
traiy to the roles. She then told me many things
[to sa; to Miss Boss, and some of her instructions
[she repeated to me, so that I might not be at a loss
[wben I should converse with her, no matter what
Dbjeetions she might raise.

Among other tilings which I most distinctly
ollect, she told me to assure her, that as to tiie

appiness of a Convent, no person could possibly

I more happy than nuns; for there we were as*
Bd of the favour of God, and of heavenly enjoy-

Bents after death ; that while in the world, other
women would draw us off from our duty,

nd ocenpy our minds with thoughts that would do
barm : there we were exposed to no such dan-

m. The sinfulness of vain thoughts might ap-

iji

:'.v

iI|h|

' ^BIiiu^I^hVi'

^Hn

:256

MARIA MOmt.

Tpear to ns yerj trifling, but it was yery differentia i
^6 sight of God; and how could we hope to resist
ithe temptations surrounding us in Buoh a manner
in the world ? If she made any allnsion to her at-
tachment to the young man before mentioned the I
iSnperior told me to declaim against it, as an W
mination to think of such a thing in the nunnery
ihai I could not converse with her if she spoke of
it «gain, as not a proper person. If she appealed!
to hesitate at my proposition, I was to tell herl
solenmly, that my offer was a direct invitation froml
Jesus Christ to become his spouse, which eoaldl
not be rejected without great guilt [

The Superior told me that I should be richly r»*j
warded if I succeeded. She thought I would soon
be made an old (or confidential! nun : and shi
would give me a most precious reuc, witii a piec
of the heart of Mary Magdalen, and intercede fo
me with the Virgin.

After I had listened attentively to all these in^
strnctions received from a woman to whom I look]
ed with unbounded respect and veoeration, I lefi
her, prepared to put them into practice to the I
of my ability, much excited with the hope of
complishing what I thought a truly great andmeiij
torious act, and one that would ensure the brIt
tion of my friend.

The reader may perhaps here recall the diseii
flures I have heretofore made, of the crimes 1 1
witnessed, and the sufferings I had undergone
fore this period of my convent life, and wond
how I could possibly have been so far deluded,
really to believe what I was thus prepared to u
4Sueh, however, is indeed the trath ; eicept tb

MABIA MONK.

257

ImiutaUoWy that my conscience repeatedly dis-
turbed me, and serioasly too, with the snggesdoii
that I flhonld be guilty of direct deception, if I said,
either tb<(t I was happy in the Convent, or that I
had a. all ^imes nnshaken faith in any of the de-
elaratioDB I was abont to make. More than once,
too I was shocked at the idea of deceiving, my
confiding yonng friend. Bat as I believed what
I had been so often tanght, about the virtue of de- , '
eeption, in certain circumstances, I did my best to '
i smother my scruples.

The promised arrangemants were made by the

ISaperior ; the old nuns were instructed not to in-

teirapt any conversation they might witness be*

keen Miss Boss and myself, and I was directed,

[at ihe appointed hour, to read the lecture. I thus

rily found the opportunity I sought, and was

on with Miss Boss, while the old nuns appeared

rery busy in another part of the room, and unob-

ffving. Though under a repeated promise to re-

Bidtoher the state of my mind, now that I had

loDg familiar with the secrets of the nunnery,

most cautiously guarded myself, and assumed

rhat did not belong to me— the appearance of one

[eTotedly fond of ti^e institution.

I told her that I had now been long enough a

fBeoeived ** to be able to express an opinion ; and

must inform her that we lived a most happy life

jithm the institution ; that I would urge her, as a

send, to take the veil, and withdraw from that

pd which was so full of temptations. To this

|«lentt very serious ear ; and I saw that my

ids produced a solemn and saddening effeet np<

her feelings. She replied that she felt quite

258

MARIA MONK.

undecided what to do. She seemed solicitong to
he still farther assnred of the happiness I bad
spoken of as enjoyed by the nuns.

When she touched that subject, I addressed her
exactly after the manner directed by the Superior
and speaking rather harshly, inquired of her, **])o
yon condemn the life of a nnn then ?" She Id.
stanUy answered, ** No \** and she easily admitted
all I said about the attention paid to the comfort of
those in the^ Convent *' But," said she, my mo-
ther is Tory much opposed to my taking the veil*
she is a widow, and yon know we are boimd to
honour and obey our parents — nature teaches ns
thaf The Superior had furnished me, in French
with an answer to this objection; and as we were
accustomed to converse in Engliish, I had only to
translate her words, which were,

*< Les droits de nos parens ne sent pas devant
les droits de notre religion."

** The claims of our parents are not before those
of onr religion.*'

** I shan't be a nun !*' said she, with determina-
tion. I talked with her, however, some time, and
she began again to listen patiently.

I then added, that CSirist had commanded ns to
'^forsake father and mother" to be his desciples,
and that we must have trials and tribulations be-
fore we could enter the kingdom of heaven. She
told me that she felt then less inclined to tiie world
than she had when we had last conversed together;

but at length she alluded to Mr. . "Ney

mention,"! exclaimed, **8uch abominations! It
is sin, it is defilement to speak of such a thjng in
so holy a place as a convent" This I said very

MARIA MONK.

J69

not before those

mnoh in the manner and tone which the Superior
had used in dictating it to me. I then added,
•<Now this is the omj obstacle which the devil
puts in the way of yonr salyation— and see how he
ms more to prevent yon, the nearer you are get-
ting to it All that yon have to do, then, is to re«
sist the more.*'

And the repetition of these expressions, has
brought to my mind many others which I often
heard, not only about that time, but frequently be-
fore and afterwurds. One brings up another ; and
to speak of objections that might be made to any of
our numexy doctrines, or to hear a question asked
about our way of life, naturally calls to my mem-
oiy tiie replies which were made to them.

"Are you at liberty to buy a farm, and sell it
when you please ? No— Then how can you give
yourself to a young man when you please V*

**Ma8t we not obey our parente? — Quand les
droits de la religion sent eonceme, les droits de la
nature cessent'*

['*When the rights or claims of religion are
eoneemed, the rights (or claims) of nature cease."]
When the question is put to an old nun-^^* What
made you become a nun ?'* the regular, fixed an-
swer always is, with a peculiar drawl— -** Divine
love." But such things as these, although they
come up very strongly to my mind, may perhaps
appear to be not wortii mentioning.

The conversation I held with poor Miss Ross
was much longer than I can undertake to give a
full account of; but after I had over and over
again ptbted the happiness of a nun's life in the
brightest manner I was able, and assured her that

260

KABIA MONK.

I had never known blessednesB before I had enter.
ed upon it, I told her that I had had Bome inspira.
tions from heayen, each as I had never enjoyed
b'^fore, and that she would have the same. I also
told her with solemnity, that she had nowreoeiv^
through me, an invitation from Jesas Christ, to be-
come his bride ; and that if she rejected it, it
wonld be a sin of deep ingratitude, and he wonid
reject her from the kingdom of heaven : that it
was her dnty to enter the Convent as a veiled nnn
without regarding the feelings of her mother, or
any other obstacle ; and that she was hound to
obtain all the property she could, and put it into
the treasury of the institution.

CHAPTER XV.

Story of Miss Ross continued— Flan to get her into the
Kunneiy for life— Arrangements— Execution of our
design.

It was very easy for me to see that what I said had
a great effect on Miss Ross. I found it impoBsible
however, to make her promise me to take the TeU.
She persisted that she must see her mother first. I
then left her, and went to the Superior's loom,
where I informed her of all that had passed. She
appeared very much delighted, and treated me with
great eondescension and kindness. She said,
however, that we should yet have to do much ; for
it was plain to her that the novice had very strong
scruples to overcome— and she added, tiiat the
devil's influence was very powerful over some per*
sons. We must therefore pursue a plan which

MARIA MONK*

261

wonM require great oaation an|d skill on our part,
bat which, she had no doabt, would pro^e sncoess-
fal This she communicated to me in a few words.
Xhat evening the Superior told the nuns that she
had been warned in a dream that some one was in
great temptations, and desired them to say a Pater
and an Ave for her.

We were to disguise ourselves, and appear to
Miss Boss, I as Satan, and she as the Holj Mo-
ther. Miss Boss must be brought alone, and with
Bolemnity, to some place where we could carry
through the deception without interruption, and
with the best effect The whole of her plan she
communicated to me ; bnt as we had several re-
hearsals to go through in preparation, instead of
repeating her instructions, I had better relate what
was done in conformity with them.

When we were prepared to go through with our
parts, in order that we might become familiar with
them, she gave me an old robe, which she made
me wrap around me, and the devil's cap, head, and
horns, which is kept to scare the nuns, few of
whom know of it. Thus I was concealed, every
thing except my eyes, and then approached a spot
where we unagined the novice to be lying. I ad-
dressed her in a feigned yoice, and invited her to
become my servant, promising her a happy and
easy life. In an instant, at a moment when we
sapposed her to be making a sign of the cross, I
stopped speaking, and hastily withdrew. After a
short Ume, I returned, and made other propositions
to her : and then, after flying again from the cross
again eame back, and promised her, in case she
would comply, to ensure her marriage with the

262

MARIA MONK

man she loved. I then fetired onee more ; after
whieh, the Superior approached, and with as sweet
and winning a Toioe as she eonld assame, said that
she had listened to what had passed, and had come
to assure her of her protection.

After I had become familiar with my part in thig
sad farce, and acted it to the satisfaction of the
Superior, she took measures to have it performed
for the last time. In this also I had a principal
part to perform: for I was directed to hold ano-
ther conversation with my deceived friend; and
in obedience to instructions, on Saturday eyenine
took her into the Examination of Conscience room
and informed her, that I had been inspired by the
Virgin Mary to tell her, that if she would go into
the nuns' private chapel, the Holy Mother would
speak with her. I informed her, however, that it
would not be at all surprising if the devil shonld
appear to her, and endeavour to prevent her from
holding so happy an interview ; and that if she
should be tempted, she must cross herself, and
Satan would instantiy leave her, because he conld
not withstand the power of the sign. Then teUiog
her that she must keep a strict fast on Sunday
evening, I informed her, that on Monday morning
I would be with her again.

In the mean time, the Superior, with the help of
one of the old nuns. Saint Margarite, and myself,
had darkened the private chapel as much as we
could, by means of black curtains, and placed only
a single light in it, and that a taper, burning bjr
the side of the altar. We also took down the cross,
and laid it on the floor, with the head turned towards
the door, and the foot towards the altar. When all

MARIA MONK.

263

fuprepared, I went to Miss Ross, and eondnetedher
into the ohapel. Itoldher to lie down upon thecross,
fiib her arms extended, in the attitade of the cm-
eiged Saviour, which she did ; and then bound
her eyes tight with a bandage, all jnst as the Sa-
perior had ordered, telling her she might otherwise
gee a horrid sight. I then retired by the door,
jQst oatside of which, the Superior was standing;
and there I was covered with the old iK>be ; for u-
ihongh it was so dark, the eyes of the poor girl
were blinded, and her head purposely so placed,
that she could hardly have seen us under any cir-
enmstances, yet the Superior said, perhaps she
might peep a little and see us. If this plan failed,
she said, she must resort to some other.

We were botii completely disguised ; and I had
not only the dress on, and devil^s cap, but a slice
eat from a potato, and slit in different ways so as
to resemble great teeth, which was crowded into
my month. The front part of my cap had been
tamed np inside, and I painted my cheeks with some
red pamt the Superior gave me ; and she afterwards
put on more paint, thinking I had not enough.

Alter 1 bad left Miss Boss in the chapel about a
qaarter of an hour, the Superior signified that it
was time to return, and begin my temptation. I
therefore approached her, and standing a little dis-
tance from her head, repeated some of the words I
had been taught; and the circumstances are still
most distinctly before me, so that I remember the
words as if I had uttered them only yesterday.
Perhaps one reason of it is, that every few minutes
daring the whole time, my conscience stung me se-
; Terely, so that I could scarcely go on with my pari

264

MARIA MONK.

" Are you a fool," said I, •< to be lying there in
■aoh a poatare, for that God of yours ? Had you
not better serve me ?*' She raised her hand with-
out speaking, and made the sign of the cross, say^
ing, " Jesa, Maria, Joseph, ayez pide de moi ''
(Jesus, Mary, Joseph, have pity on me !) I ^^il.
ed no longer, but immediately retired softly, as if
I had vanished. After standing a few minutes be.
side the Superior, just outside of the door, withont
either of us speaking, she touched me, and I ap.
proached the poor novice again.

*' Would yon not like to come out of this place,"
I asked her, ** and serve me? You shaJl have no<
thing but balls and pleasure of all kinds.*' Miss
Boss made the sign of the cross again, and I van.
ished as quickly and silently as before. In a short
time I entered again, and told her, if yon will only
leave this nunnery, I will do any thing for yon yea
wish — ^I will get you married to the young man
you love so much."

Still the poor unsuspecting girl, though doabt-
less terrified, made the sign of the cross again and
again; and at length I left her saying '^Jesn,
Maria, Joseph, ayez pitie de moL" I then took off

succeed, I will try force.' She then went in andj
addressed her, in French, in this manner:

'* I am your Holy Mother, (which means the
Virgin Mary,) I have been listening to your faith-
fulness, and will adopt you as one of my children.]
Are yon willing to become one of my daughters?
If yon are, you must join the sisters this weekisnd

If ARIA MONK.

266

0ik0 your towi before another Sabbath passes
oTer your head; for I am afraid the devil is
jQiidng great plans to get yoo. Bat if you have
roar TOWS made, I think yon will be safe."

Sbe then asked her if she was willing to give
up all she had to the Holy Choroh, and told her,
{bat unless die woald part with all, she conld not
Kjcept her. She then promised her her protec-
tion, if she was willing, and retired saying, ** Peace
be with yon."

In the afternoon I was sent to request her to go
into the Superior's room, as she wished to speak
with her. On entering it, we fonnd the Snperior
of the Convent and the Superior of the Seminary
both there. The former addressed her, telling her
ihat she had had a vision, in which she was told
that the youig novice who was doing penance in
ibeehapel, was acceptable in the sight of Qod. At
this, Buss Boss appeared qnite overjoyed, bat
aoanely able to speak.

The Snperior then told her, that she onght to
listen to any advice I might give her, for she had
entire eonfidence in me, and she onght to be guid-
ed by my counsel. She requested her to return to
the novices' department, retire into a comer, and
determine what she woidd do. She then whisper-
ed to me, and desired me to remain with her until
the Snperior of the Seminary went away, which I
did. She then told me to go to Miss Boss again,
and eoax her to be received almost immediately.

I went accordingly, and endeavoured to get a
pmise from her to tiiat effect, bnt I was unable.
She persbted that she must see her mother before
she eonld take the veil. I inquired of her the rea-

266

■OB.

MARTA MONK.

She npliedy thai she wished to give to the
noxmenr all tne property her mother oonld spare
her. This I oommiinicated to the Superior, who
told me to eay that her mother should be sent for
the next day. Her mother came, and had an in.
terview with her, in which she learnt her dangh*
ter*s intention to become a nun. This she opposed
to her utmost; but all the arguments and entree
ties she used, were utterly Tain— she could make
no impression. Her daughter had wished to see
her only to tell her that such was her resolution
and to request her to deliver her that afternoon, ali
the money she intended ever to give her. The
widow retired— the money was sent— Miss Boss
took the veil on the Wednesday morning following
and brought a large contribution. I was not pre<'
sent at her reception; and I do not think it neces*
sary to say any thing further on a subject, which
is, and ever must be, all my life, one of the most
painful with which I have had any connexion. 1
will only add, that although I often saw Saint
Mary, (as she was called, after her supposed pa-
troness J I never spoke with her after her recep*
tion. Opportunities, it is true, were not veiyfre*
quent ; but, when they were offered, she repeatedly
seemed disposed to speak to me. I saw, at length,
that she was becoming a favourite with Jane Bay,
which pleased me, knowing that she would be of
some service to her, and befriend her. Manyi
time she would fix her eyes upon me, and it seemed
as if they would pierce through my soul.

MARIA MONK.

CHAPTER XVL

267

foierecolleotloiiiof Jane Bay— Her eonfesBlons of her

biitoiy.

of the nniiB was from St Mark's, and bore the
ie of St Mark. Her father Tieitea the Snpe-
ior one day, and requested her to have the nuns
ly for him daily for a short time, leaving with
[erteoDsiderable sum of money to pay for their
intereesflioD. Saoh things were oooasionally done
kj different persons. He also sent about forty
lollan to hu daughter, with a desire that they
jight be distributed among the nuns, to purchase
ibatever they might wish for. The Superior in-
Conned as that it was quite inconsistent with the
Jes of the nuns to receive such presents, but that,
onsidering the devout character of the giver, she
loold not entirely forbid the execution of his re-
lest She Uierefore furnished us with some mo-
BseB to made into candy, and allowed us an un-
Boal degree of liberty during a part of a day. A
dderable quantity of molasses was made into
ndy by some of the most skilled in the process :
bngh by no means as much as forty dollars*
rorth. The Superior, however, had a trick play-
on her in consequence of the indulgence: for
ome of OS attributed it to a desire of pleasing the
eontributor, and not to any kindness towards
bItos.

When the time for evening prayers had almost
rived, Jane Ray proposed to drop a little warm
idy in the chairs of the Superior and two old
This was soon done i and in a few min-

rli

I> i

'^n

li*

1.1

268

MARIA MONK.

iites those seats, as well as the others in the corn!
miinity room, were occupied, and the prayers eo
ing on. At the close the Snperior attempted
rise, but fell back again into her chair • and
the same moment the two old nuns did the same.
After a few nnsnccessfol attempts, their sitaatiol
became evident to all the assembly; and there wa
a great embarrassment at once among us all, aria
ing from a disposition to speak and to langh, op,
posed by the endeavour to suppress both. Th]
scene was a very ludicrous one, and Jane enjoye
much amusement before the Superior and the oli
nuns could be set at liberty.

Jane Kay would sometimes seem to be overcomj
and lose courage, when detected and exposed fo
some of her tricks, even though not condemned i
any severe penance. I have seen her cry,
even roar, after committing some breach of mlesl
and then retire to a comer, and after composinj
herself, begin to meditate a new trick. This sh]
would commonly carry into effect with snccessl
and then laughing aloud, declare that she was sat^
fied and happy again.

Sometimes she would submit to penances witl
perfect indifference, though they made her tbj
constant object of observation. To punish herfoT
her habitual negligence in dress, she was once oJ
dered to wear an old nightcap until it fell to pieeeg]
but still she was seen again as usual, with b^
apron half on and half off, and with stockings
different colours.

She would occasionally slip into the
room, steal pass tickets, and get into the
with them ; and this she did so boldly, that

MARIA MONK.

269

the occasion of the tickets being disused.
J^etimes she voald bring a Roman Catholic
lewspaper ont of the Superior's room, and give it
the nuns to read; and sometimes repeat to ns
rbatshe had overheard said in private.
Sometimes scenes of great agitation woald occnr,
id things wonld be carried to such a state, that
le and another of the nans would become desper-
je and resist with violence. For it is to be re-
Bembered, that unspeakable practices were some-
resorted to, at the will of the priests or
Buops, conntenanoed by the Superior; and
imetimes, as I have stated in my first volume,
Qoired on the authority of the Pope.
Jane Bay sometimes appeared as a loud and
ilent opposer of what were considered the estab-
tied roles of the Convent. She would break out
dennndations of the priests, and berate them in
which it would be difficult to imitate, if it
worth whUe. Other nuns would sometimes
, <*Are you not ashamed to show so little
it for the holy fathers?" ** Why are they
it ashamed,*' she would reply, ** to show no re-
it for the holy sisters 7**

Some of the best opportunities I ever had for

Teising with Jane, were at night ; for during a

iderable time she had her bed opposite mine,

by watching for a moment, when she could do

withont being seen by the night watch, she

d slip over to me, and get into my bed. Thus

haYe often spent hours together, and she found

occasions very convenient for communicating

lesQch plans an she devised for amusement or

I sometimes lent an ear to her propo-

S70

MARIA MONK.

sals, qnlie against my will ; for I commonly com
eladed with a solemn confession of the wickedness I
as I supposed it, in which she thus indnced andl
sometimes almost compelled me to engage. IndeedJ
it often happened that I had nothing to do in the
morning, as it were, but to beg pardon ; and when
I was asked why I had so much of that bnsinessta
do, I commonly laid it to Jane Ray. She, howl
ever, appeared to take much pleasure in the stolen
interyiews we thns had; and when we were obliged
to lie at a distance from each other, she told ma
that it caused her to weep more than she had eve
done in her life.

Z naturally felt much curiosity to learn some
thing of the history of Jane Bay, and repeatedli
asked her questions intended to lead her to telloi
something of her family, her former residence,
life. But, although so communicative on mo,
other subjects, on this she evidently did not likj
to speak. Bepeatedly have I known her to mii]
my inauiries, and many times, also, when I spok
Tery plainly, she would become silent, and refas
to speak a word. All this unwillingness, onlj
served to increase my desire to know the truth, bo
I never was able to draw from her any thmg mon
than a very brief and general accoant of herself j
for never, except on a single occasion, did shj
comply with my wishes so far as even to speak
the subject.

One night, when she had secretly left her
and entered mine, she happened to be in a ver
communicative mood, though she appeared moij
depressed and deeply sunk in melancholy than
had ever known her before. She then infome

KABIA MONK.

271

ne that she had become attached to an officer of

the British army in Quebec, in whom she confided

ioberrnin, believing that he intended to marry her.

She left her parents, and after a time proceeded

inib him to Montreal. There he invited her to visit

ihe Hotel Dien Nunnery, as a curiosity ; but to

ler gorprise, she suddenly found herself deserted

IT him, and the doors closed upon her. From

'hat she observed or heard, she soon learnt that

was done in consequence of. an arrangement

ide between the officer and the Superiors of the

iminaiy and Convent, the first having paid a

e sum of money to have her shut up from the

orld.

I understood her to say that fhs officer was an

Id-de-oamp of the former governor of Canada, Sir

'eregrine Maitland. The priests, she believed,

ew her story, but few of the nuns, she fhought^

any knowledge of it except myself.

Hiiii

i!!l

'i-;^

CHAPTER XVIL

ly fear of the priests— Arguments used to keep us in
isiibjection— Old nuns.

m kept in great fear of the priests, by pretences
ey made to various kinds of power. I was once
ifeasing to Father Bedar, who is now dead, and
|dhim I had something on my conscience which
lid not like to communicate. He said to me, *< I
76 power to strike you dead this minute, but I

. not I will spare yon. Go and examine yonr
Dsoiesce, and see if you cannot come back and

Itell me what it is that you now conceal.

"i'l

272

ICABIi. Kons.

I was mnoh frightened ; for I believed what he
■aid, and sapposea he comd have taken away mv
life on the spot by only wishing it. I therefore
intmediately went to the examination of my con-
science with fear and trembling.

I have remarked in my first volume, more than
onccj that we were told it was a duty to submit to
the hcentious wishes of the priests, liiis we were
urged to on various considerations. We were told
for instance, that being consecrated to Gk)d we
were not our own, and even our persons were not i
to be regarded as at our disposal. Out of consider- j
ations of gratitude, too, we were told, it was our
duty to suppress the doubts and misgivings which
would sometimes arise in our minds, when we al-
lowed our consciences to present the nature of oori
life in its own proper light. If there were no
priests, we were reminded we could never get tol
heaven ; and it would be ungrateful in the eztremeJ
after being insured of eternal life by their kindl
offices, if we should deny them any wish what-|
ever.

In spite, however, of all that was said, our ..
ings often revolted, and arg'iments were renew.
Not only so, but now and then, as I have hefo.
remarked, penances of different kinds were oftei
resorted to, to suppress them.

One of the tales told us by the priests, was
— intended to prove the power they exercise U
means of sacraments which none bcit they can ad|
minister. I recollect that it wus recounted to
one day at catechism, by one of the fathers.

*' I was once travelling," said he, '^in a desobij
region, when I saw something flying like a wiutj
dove. Believing it to be the Holy Spirit, 1 folloi

lievcd what be
(aken away my
it. I theieloie
tion of my con-

Lume, more than
uty to suumit to
I, This we were
s. We were told,
ated to God, ^e
persons were not
, Out oi considei-
e told, it was oui
misgivings which
Lnds, when we al-l
; the nature of our
If there were nol
could never get tol
eful in the extreme,!
life by their kindl
n any wish what-l

MARIA MONK.

273

[dlie,**intt<ie8°H
flying Uke a wbij

ad it, and it led me to a house, over the door of
which it stopped. I went in, and found an old
laanon his death-bed, who had never been bap-
tized, nor ever heard of any religion, I baptized
]um { and he went ofiF straight to heaven.*'*

• Among my early lecollections, are many anecdotes
uinstrating the peculiar ODinions and ceiN^monies of the
Canadian Catholics in and about Montreal. My grand-
mother, Mrs. Mills, was a Scotch woman, and a firm Pro-
tegtani She had a handsome estate about four miles
distant from the city, on the Lachine road, where I re-
peatedly visited her. She was required, like everybody
else in the parish who was able, to fiimish, in her turn,
what is called " holy bread," which is given out in church
by tiie priest before sacrament, but eaten afterwards.
The preparation of it was attended with much trouble
ind Bome expense ; for there were to be eleven loaves
made, of different dzes, though they were all of consider-
; ible weight. They were made with a good su]^ly of eggs
and butter, and took about a bag of flour. They were
ornamented on the top with Feter^s cock crowing, hav>
ling on bis head a tinsel crown, and were starred over, in
[a particular manner, which required great painstaking,
(and often cost many trials before they would be done
right. My grandmother used to say that it always cost
ber tc:» or twelve dollars to prepare the holy bread ; and
ke sacriflce of her feelings appeared to be stul more reluc-
QUy aubmitted to ; for she called it» In her broad
otcn dialect, a service to the Deevil,
She was a regular devout attendant on public worship ;
otwitbstanding her advanced og» (above eighty) and
lie distance from her church, in Montreal, she seldom or
ever failed to attend, although in consequence of cer-
nonhappy circumstances in her family. She could not
rsome vears command the services of the horse;j in the
m, and always had to walk. I have lately conversed
ith a F?otestant clergyman residing in Canada, who
Dice in bigh terms of my grandmother, and said he had
ten overtaken her on the road home from church in the
fow, and taken her up in his sleigh,
jifterberdeath, the Roman Catholics dwelling in her

274

MAKIA MONK.

Ode reason why I did not Hire to approach the
cells occupied by the imprisoned nuns, was this :
the Supenor had told me that they were pogsessed
by evil spirits, and that I must idways maks the
sign of th« erosa on going into the ceUar.

neighbourhood held her memory in great dislike and
were not allowed to pass over any part of her fanu unless
they had holy water about them, for fear of being beset
byevllipirits.

A man I knew, whose name it is not necessary to men-
tion, the son of a Protestant mother, wished to marry a
Catholic woman, but knew he would be disinherited if
he did so before slie disposed of her property. The priest
allowed them to live together as man and wife, with the
intention to be married at a future time. When the
neighbours began to talk about them, the priest gave the
woman permission to turn Protestant for a time, and to
be married by a Protestant Glernrman, which was done
by Mr. Black. After the death of her mother-hi-Iaw, she
threw off all disguise and avowed her Catholic sentimenti
again.

As this worthjr couple lived in the house of the parent,
in accordance with custom, they had to have the house!
blessed bv a prie8t,before it was thought to be proper orsafe
to inhabit it. Accordingly the ceremony was performed,
of driving out the devils ; and a considerable sum of mo'
uey was paid to the priest, I believe about a dollar for
each window in the house. The man (who appeared to I
have no real principle) had a priest on his farm as manyl
as seven or eight times to my knowledge, to bless hiil
ground, and to secure his crops firom msects ; for some)
of his neighbours had persuaded him that it had beenl
cursed in particular spots where a Protestant mhiisterl
had trodden, when he visited it during the life of his]
mother, so that it was unfit to produce the priest's ble
ed grain.

The ceremony of blessing ground and seeds is one ^
commonly practised in those places in Canada, when
have been. Before a farmer plants, he takes a band
of seed to his |>rie8t, who blesses it, before it is fit tij
grow ; and receives a sum of money for it, coumooiy,

e to approacli the
& nuna, was this :
bey ^evo poBBeBBed
t always make the
the oeUar.

> In great dislike, and
part of her farm unless
[or (ear of being beset

gnotneceBsarytomen-
,er wished to mam a
olid be dlBlnkerited it
aVproperty. The priest

ttture time. When the
ihem,tbeprleBt gave the
B8tanttorattoe,andto
Sman, which WW done
Sf^ermother-ln-law.she
d^rCathoUcaentlmeDU

> the house of the patent J,
V had to have the houM

Lu^httobeproperotsafe

^onsldeiablesumofm^

here a Pwtestant minyMJ

MARIA MONK.

975

There are seTen sine, as we were tanght, whioh
priests eannot forgive, viz : that of refusing to pay
tythes to the chnreh, injuring dumb animids, set-
ting a honse on fire, hearing a Protestant preach,
reading Protestant books, and one more which I
do not remember. These, however, can be for-
given by the Bishop or the Grand Vicar.

From what I heard and observed at different
times, I had reason to believe that a serions mis-
understanding existed between the Bishop and
father Richards. I heard it hinted, in some way,
that the former would probably have had his resi-
dence in the nunnery but for Uie latter. But this
I state only as what I have been told.

The term '* old nun," I did not particularly ex-
plain in my first edition. It did not refer entirely
to age. None of the nuns, indeed, were old wo-
men. For some reason or other, none of them ap-
pealed to me to be above forty years of age and few
more than thirty. I never knew what made the
d^erence between them and the common veiled
iDoni, like myself. It was easy to see that they
itood on a different footing from the rest of us, but
[ibat that footing was I never could thoroughly
I understand. They had a separate sleeping room,

[believe, as manv shillings as there are grains. These are

)be mixed with the rest of the seed before sowing, and

lien yen are sure of a good crop.— At sowing time the

priests have often a good deal to do in this way, and re-

eive much money. The fiurmers often pay them in grain

Astead of money, which is commonly the best that is to

! had. I know that an uncle of mine commonly bought

I seed wheat at the Seminary, because it was the best

oould obtahi. The priests have in this way a good

1 of trade and barter to carry on, as is well known in

Id about Afontreal

■i ,!;»

! I

¥'m

276

HABU MOWK.

» *u^ und ezeroised much aaiho-
wtaieh I h$.y» f *^*']r^ing and directing opew
rity, notmerely « "'•fTo^oeB' departoento. bnt

nnSr*e''8?J^or«'d BometimeB didpuni,.

-tjs:^ra^ed^f'-;^-se:^:^

lomal tottodnctoon to the «P»^^^^^j^ ^^^^

«n Old Nnn, M»d *»•»'?? ^^ occurred to me as
that of the " Keo* V -t I faew oJ the difference
qniteposriWe, (*«««?^tned nnns.) that "Old
between ?<>^„*^en some peculiar oaths, and
Nuns " might ll«;'*J''°pecial nature. All this,
gubmitted to 'J''®' " ",_ ^om their conduct, and
howeye*. I »*«"f.«^2nding which they appear-
the concert and «»*«»*J°?^d Uie Superior. No
ed to have with each ^^^'^^^^^ .^eef, and I
tother light w?!* I °°^k as ever, although tt.
aa 8tin aa «'««'''" ^'e much encouragement t.
Superior once fj'* ^' « " Old Nun."

lome of th»* *'»**J:^*^*aeed a number of them
bom being clA, «^^»X' -«o*e ^
were below w»>»jy/^ real names, faimhes, ot
judgment., Aa *«' ^*„ Jl uttleol themaeothen.
lMirS>nal history, }J^^^ ^; Mere (my mother
^e called thom, tanib^y. »» ^^^ J^y .j,,^

"«; no d«.bt. «^^»t.;j^tde.rr^S|
by Which " Old Nnna «« ^^^^ ^ ^^^ , ^
eleyation of •."^"Sf* „ ia consequence ef my
mpariot cunning. « wa» m » |

MARIA MONK.

277

ittccess at Imposiare, that the Superior told me
the hoped I might become one ; and the old nans
whom I best knew, were among the greatest adepts
it duplicity I ever saw.

CHAPTER XVIII.

Shaving the hair in the Nunnenr— Disputes about money
A Nun admitted for money— influence of Jealousy.

Among the practices in the nunnery, is that of
shaving the hair of the nnns on their admission —
Tliis is done to most, hat not all ; as the hair of
gome is more easily disposed in a manner thought
necessaiy to the proper arrangement of the head-
band and veiL My hair was shaved on my recep-
tion, and frequently afterwards. At the time of
my escape from the convent, it was very short;
since when it has been growing, and it is now
about six inches long. We used sometimes to
shave each other's heads, and I have done it for
other nuns.

It is a rule, that no novice shall be received who
is not in sound health. Miss Louisa Bouequier,
of St. Denis, owed her escape from the life of a
nun to an affection of the head, on account of
which she was discharged from her noviciate when
within about three months of the period when she
would have taken the veiL

Sometimes the priest would come to the Supe-
rior to borrow money of her, when she would show
liberality towards some, but others I have heard
her blame for not paying what they already owed

278

MARIA MONK.

her. In several instanoes 1 knew dlfficultieB to
arise from money affairs.

One day I heard a conversation between the
Bishop and the Superior of the Seminary abont a
quantity of plete which an old lady, on her decease
had bequeath ;id to the church* The Superior
wished to appropriate it to the expens s of the
Seminary, bat the Bishop claimed it as his own.
He said he wanted a set of plate and would have
it sent to his house for his own use. The Sui «^.
rior replied, that he could do that as soon ay ue
had paid the price which he could get for it at the
silversmith's. The B hop asked him if he knetr
whom he was talking to; and things seemed
likely to rise to some height, when I left the room.

I heard a conversation, soon after my admission
as a nun, between the Bi<r)hop and the Superior of
the nunnery, in her room. The Bishop was com-
plaining that he could not get his proper dues from
the priests ; for, as I understood, each p> iest is
required to pay two English shillings ont of every
dollar he receives, for his support in the Seminary;
while the whole of the profits of every high mass
for the dead, is considered the property of the Sem-
inary. The Superior of the nunnery replied, that
the priests would be bettor able to pay all their
debts if they did not gamble so much ; and the
state of the country at that time was nnfayourable,
and little money was to be had. The Bishop said
he must preach a sermon to the people, to make
them more liberal in their contributions.

I saw a nun one day ^hose appearanoe strock
me in ^ singular manner. She was oondacting a
priest through the sewing room, and had a large

MARIA IfONK,

279

banob of keys, like an old nnn. I oonld hardly
tell what to think when I looked on her. It seemed
18 if I must have seen her before, and yet I oonld
not remember when or where ; and I had an im-
pressioD that she conld not be a nnn. For some
reason or other which I oonld not understand, I
'e\i a great anxiety to know something about her,
and inquired of Jane Ray, but she oould tell me
bat little or nothing. I then asked leave of the
Superior to speak with Saiute Thomas,— for that I
understood was her name. — She consented, on con-
dition that we should converse in her presence. I
accordingly addressed her ; but, much to my mor-
tification and p ^rise, she replied very coldly, and
fihowed at fiibi. ao disposition to interchange more
than a salutation with me. She soon, however,
took an opportunity to write something on a bit of
paper ^^itii a pencil, and to slip it into my hand,
which I eagerly read as soon as I could safely do so ;
and there I found an explanation of her conduct She
intimated that she was unwilling to confide in the
Superior, but wished to see me alone the first
opportunity.

We soon after had a secret interview, for one
night she stole into my bed, and we lay and talked
together. She then appeared quite unreserved,
and perfectly cordial, and repeated that she be-
lieved the Superior was only a spy over us. We
soon found that we had been acquaintances in
former years, and had been in the Congregational
Nunnery together, but after her leaving it, I had
met her twice in the street, and heard of her from
some one ; her family being so wealthy, we had no
interoourse in society. She was from a place be-

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(71«)I72-4S03

•SS

280

MAMA MONK.

hind the mountain, where her father, I believe, was
a grocer, and a man of wealth. She had an mole
MoDohald.

I learnt from her the cironmstanoea under which
she entered the nunnery ; and they were peculiar.
She had not passed a noviciate, bnt had pnrehased
her admission without such preparation, by the
paying of a large sum of money, as she had pecn-
liar reasons for wishing for it

My restless anxiety was thus in a degree reliev-
ed, for I found that my impressions were right,
and ihi|t St Thomas was not a nun in the common
meaning of the word ; but on the other hand, I
found I had been deceived in believing ^at all ad-
mitted into the Convent, had to pass throngh the
same long trial and training to which I had been
subject

The state of things in the nunnery cannot be
fully understood, without a knowledge of the fact,
that much jealousy always exists between some of
the nuns, on account of their preferences for par-
ticular priests. And yet a priest once told me,
that there was more wrangling done in the Semin-
nary about nuns, than any thing else.

Saint Qotilde died while I was there, of a nata-
ral death ; and I heard one of the other nuns say
she was glad of it, because she had drawn off the
infections of a priest from her. The priests often
bring in litUe delicacies into the nunnery for their
favourites, such as fruit, confectionary, &o,, and
give them without the Superior's knowledge ; and
sometimes make them much more valuable pre-
sents.

There was a nnn who enteirtained a very bitter

MABU. MONK.

281

ipiiit towards me. This was Salnte Jane ; and a
eraM, disagreeable ereatore she was as I ever saw.
She would sometimes c[et dose by me on purpose,
while employed in ironing, or some other kind of
woik whioh required ns to be np, and in time of
lilaiee stand upon my feet, in order to make me
gpeik and get a penance. She onoe complained to
i the Superior, lliat she saw me looking from a place
in the nmmery which she mentioned, and heard
hheToioeof some person speaking with me. Al-
IfhoQgh this was utterly fdse, the Superior thought
tl might have some intention of escaping, and sen-
Itencedme to the most severe penance I ever endured
-yis: to live' on bread and water for three weeks,
diet appeared to reduce my strength ; and I
feied more severely than usual from the kneel-
jpostnre at prayers, which was always peculiar-
distressing to me, and made me almost desper-
B, 80 Uiat I would sometimes almost as readily
isllYe.

CHAPTER XIX.

lumen of the Canadian Friests— Confessions of crimes
llqriomeof the Priests— Story told by Aunt Susan, of
her tiflit to a Quebec Nunnery— Nuns in Friesta' dresses
l-Siiter Turcot.

priests who are natives of Canada, are gene-

^7 T6iy downish in their manners, and often

bratish in their vices. The nuns would

Detimes laugh at seeing a Canadian priest from

M eoontry parish, coming in with a large piece

llneid in nis hand, eating it as he walked. A

282

MABIA MONK.

large proportion of the prieete are foreigners ; _
a constant interoonrse appears to be kept up ^^
France, as we often heard of snoh and saoh a fathe.
jnst arrived from that coontry. These are deciJ
dedlj the worst class. Most of the wickedness oj
which I have any knowledge, I consider as theii
work. If I shoidd repeat one half of the stone
of wickedness I have heard from the months
some of the priests,! am afraid they would hardly!
belicTed ; and yet I feel bonnd, since I have nnde
taken to make disclosures, not to omit them alt
gether.

It is not uncommon for priests to reconnt ane.
dotes of what they have seen and done; and sevq
ral stories which I have heard from some of the
I will briefly repeat.

A country priest said one day, that he knew
priest in a parish better off than those of the
inary, for he had seven nnns all to hhnsell

A priest said to me one day, that he had i
daughters in Montreal, grown up. Their moti
was a married woman. One of the <^anghteiB,
added, now occasionally confessed to hun, igne
ant, however, of any relationship.

Another said he was once applied to by a
for advice, in consequence of suspicions he bad
his wife, and quieted his suspicions by telling I
a falsehood, when he knew the husband was
jealous without cause, he himself having been
seducer.

; It may, it must offend the ear of the modest]
hear such exposures as these, even if made in
most brief and guarded language that can be oi
But I am compelled to declare, that this is not |

MARIA MONK.

288

[ihin stop here, bnt lest my readers should infer
it it if beoanee there is nothing more that coald
iH^ I mnet first make the solemn deolaration,
_it then are crime$ committed in the Hotel Dieu
^miery too abominable to mention,
Iiemember a variety of stories relating to con-
lioD, which I have heard told in the nunnery
priests; who sometimes become very comma-
MtiTe when intoxicated. One of their favourite
pies is Confession. One of them showed a
I, one day, which he said was worth a hundred
ollirs. He had received it at confession, from a
low who had stolen it, telling him that he must
I it safely restored to the owner, while his inten-
was to get it into his possession to keep, which
I did, and boasted of what he had done.
I have known priests to sit and talk about what
eyhad done in the Confessional, for three or four
at a time; and I have heard one give ano-
instractions how he might proceed, and what
might do. One priest, I know, paid another
dollars, to tell him what was confessed to him
fiyonng woman for whom he had a partiality,
[what he called love. Sometimes one will re-
st another to send a particular lady to confess
[hiOj either on acconnt of her beauty or her pro-
/, for considerable sums are in such cases ob-
led from the rich.

I the eonntry the common practice is, so far as

i»w, to fix the price of confession for the year,

me particular rate : as two bushels of wheat

IsftwelYe; or if the person is not a farmer, a

;

Iffl^^HlH'iHii''

ffl

'■a^^KKkii

Hk*

•>•

Knln

pnesl one day said to another in my hearing.

284

MARIA MONK.

You oonfesB snoh a yoang lady, mentioninff bt
uame. She does not like yon, I understand ht
cause you kiss her. She is rich, and yoa hai
more rich persons to confess than I think is yon
share. ^ ^

I knew a oonntry priest, on a wager, drink
shoe-foU of wine. X was once near the pries
parlour, (as I have called it,) when I heard two
them in an altercation, about the speed of two i
sects ; which led to a wager, on the question wL
ther that insect would move quicker over ah]
brick or a cold one. They told me to put a brid
in the cold, while they heated one on the stov]
and when both were prepared, they actually tri(
the experiment. This scene caused great ezciti
ment and loud talking. I have mentioned it I
give an idea of the manner in which much
passes in the nunnery.

One day when I was employed in the hoq
Aunt Susan came in, one of the old nuns, who]
been absent for seyeral days, and just ret
The circumstances which I am about to
were brought to my mind the other day, by
ing in Rosamond's book about the priests in
ta&ig her into a monastery in disguise.

Aunt Susan was something like Aunt Mar^
in haying something the matter with her feet wb
made her rather lame. I noticed something st
in her appearance when she came into the ho
tal, and found that she was unable to apply the(
in cupping a patient for whom that reme'
been prescribed, although she had been n
bly wlf ul before, and now appeared to try I
best I thought she must have taken too mi

ICARU MONK.

285

line, ind undertook to perfonn the openUon at
kir request, which pleased her so well, ttiat she sat
own and beoame very talkatiye, in a manner little
itent fdl^ the roles and practices of the insti-

iitioD*

^e told me that she had ]ast returned from
)oebec, whither she had ^one some days before
rom our GonTent, on a yisit to the Hotel Diea
losnexy of that city. She had gone in the dress
1 1 priest, in company with some father, and had
opportuuty to witness the arrangements and
Idts of that institation. She went on to make re-
on different subjects which had come nnder
observation, while I was employed in opera-
j on the patient. She represented the roles in
^e'ntumery which she had visited as less strict, or
strictly regarded, than oor own; and said
WIS moch less order, peace, and qoietness,
we enjoy. The Soperior, she said, had less
land over the none, and they were less order-
I and not so well contented. She had a coosin
», as she informed me, a Miss Doraoceao, who
Tory stnbbom, and onmanageable. If she
Superior, she declared she woold half mor-
her for her rebellioos condoct.
that I knew aboot the story told by Aont
1, was what she told me. I dSd not see her in
idnssof apriest, hot I had reason to believe
thennns often left the convent in soch a dis-
and that this part of her tale was by no
incredible. Indeed, during my stay in the
Bien, I personally knew more tiian one case
be kind,
bare was an old non, notorioos in Montreal,

i:,P"

286

M ABIA MOmC.

known by the nuno of Sister Turcot, her familyl
name. I wai one day employed in the hospitil I
when I Mw her enltf dressed Uke a priest, in eom'l
pany with one or two fathers. She speat t fei'
minntes there, during which she went up to onei
the patients' beds, and performed prayen insteka
of one, and with such address that I shonld nere^
have suspected any thing irregular, I think, i! i
had not known her appearance as well as I did. l]
was with the greatest difficnlty that I refhdne
from laughing at a sight so Indiorons. She wl
at the time on her way out of the nunnery, in coml
pany with the priests, and after a short delay lefl
the hospital, and went, as I supposed, into ^4
street.

But I had still stronger evidence than this,
the departure of nuns in open daylight, m the dres^
of priests ; for I was repeatedly called in to help
them to put on their disguise. I have i
the nun Sainte Feliz, three or four times; and
hateful creature the was, in consequence of ha
jealous disposition. She was always thinldi^
some one else a greater fkyonrite than herself; wiU
some priest.

The place where the change of dress was m\
ally made was the Superior's room ; and in thj
closet in the adjoining passage, at the end nea
the door, were always kept a number of piie
dresses, nearly a dielf full ; as well as serer
black-hooded cloaks, like those worn by the T
of Ohaiiij.

A priest once told me, that he had threenniul
take out of the Convent that day, and wastronUe
to know how to do it He had often taken cot on

KABIA MONK.

287

tt» iiiD^> tnd had sometimeB thonght be might
lote thtm if thej were disposed to ran away. He
eommonly directed them to limp aa they passed
iloog the streets ;— " for/* said he, *< many of the
niiests do so, and they might pass yery well for
yping priests ; and in onr dress, how can yon
tell s man from a woman ? Bnt," he added, **now
I hftfe got three ; and if I should undertake to
id them all out together, the deyils of women
ight start off three different ways at the first oor-
t we eome to, and how conld I catoh them ?'*
The change made in the dress, when a nun dis-
Ni herself as a priest, is complete. All the
eg of ^e latter are assnmed. They past
mgh the public rooms in going out of the nun*
) and aie often absent for seyeral weeks.

"^<^^-sa^

UM.iM^

11!'

UKi

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SIXMOS

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

'*r-j=:z

NUNS KISSING THE FLOOR.

THE NUN;

on.

SIX MONTHS' RESIDENCE

IN A

CONVENT.

BY REBECCA THERESA REED,

Kll INMATE OF THE URSULINE CONVENT, MOUNT
BKNBDICT, CHARLESTOWN, MASSACHUSETTS.

^^^'^0k^r-

[E FLOOR.

LONDON:
I NICHOLSON & SONS, Limited,

26, PATERNOSTER SQUARE, E.G.
AND ALBION WORKS, WAKEFIELD.

Two or three I

itandingofthe

view by the rea

ipre&oetothi

jeotofit, Miss

United States, i

tion as would ai

pear. The ma

copious notes w!

of this there oai

whether she w

sent it to the pr

I ber of her friend

Boadons to over

in print; parti;

I that her escape:

I conversations an

[were bringing u]

|ict the prevail]

SiTour of a con^

rhich, among of

DpaIsetofhea(

I world.

In little more
&po> the com
omesouipopi

.aa

PBEFACE.

Two or three facts, of importaace to a clear under-
itanding of the followinfc narrative, ahonld be kept in
^w by the reader, and are therefore stated briefly in
I pre&oe to this e^tion of the work. The chief sub-
ject of it, Miss Rebecca Beed, now of Boston in the
United States, is not so responsible for the publica-
tion as would at first on the fMse of the narrative ap-
pear. The manuscript was prepared by her, from
oopioQB notes which she took as she had opportunity :
of this there can be no doubt. But it may be doubted
whether she would at her own instance ever have
wnt it to the press. It was first published by a num-
I ber of her friends in that city, who united their per-
{ niasions to overcome her reluctance to its appearing
imprint; partly to shield her from the reproaches
that her escape from the convent, and her subsequent
leonyenations and correspondence about its discipline^
I were bringing upon her ; but principally to counter-
|iot the prevailing passion among Protestants in
tyonr of a convent education for their daughters,
vhich, among other things, appeared to be giving an
raise to the advances of Fopeiy in that quarter of
I world.

b little more than two years after Miss Reed's
ape, the convent was destroyed by fire. It had
omeso uipopular and unsightly an object, that a

ob at length assembled and burnt it to the ground.

•lyvj

PREFAOB.

It was to be expected that its proprietors and advo-
cates would charge this outrage oa the efforts of Miss
Reed and her fHends to bring the institution into
uontempt. Henoe the Superior, in her answer to
Miss Beed*8 narratiTe, represents her as saying that
her brother-in-law and another friend declared that
the eonpent ehouid eome down. As no saying of this
kind occurs in the narrative itself, and as Miss Reed
protests against having ever uttered any thing like
it, the calumny has been imputed to the Superior's
desire to confirm suspicion against her brother-in-law
who was then under indictment on a charge of abet-
ting the incendiarism.

The fact is, whatever influence the narratiye had I
upon the public judgment and feeling against the
convent, no unbiassed person could imagine any thing
like s conspiracy in the family, or among the friends]
of this young lady to destroy the property of the es-j
tablishment and hazard the lives of its inmates. The
outrage was owing to a more extended and less recenlj
prejudice against such institutions generally, and
that more particularly. Their reported and acknov^
ledged abuses— their inconsistency with the spiri||
and letter of American laws— their tendency to :
political and moral corruption, and to shelter criming
als while they produced crime— were sufficient to i
count for violence, which yet every friend to go
order must deplore.

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

U the immmer of 1826, while passing the Nnn-
nexy on Monnt Benedict, Charlestown, Massacbu-
letts, in company with my Bohoohnascer, the ques-
tion was asked by a yonng lady, who I think* was
I Roman Catholic, how we sbonld like to become
Nans. I leplied, after hearing her explanation of
tLair motives for retirement, £c. ** I should like
it well;" and gave as my principal reason, their
ippaient holy Sfe, my love of seclusion, Sso, Thd
eonvenation which passed at that time made but
litUe impression npon my mind. But soon after,
the ** Seligieuses '*• came from Boston to take
possession of Monnt Benedict as their new situa-
tion. We were in school, but had permission to
look at them as they passed. One of the scholars
lemarked, that they were Boman Catholics, and
that oar parents disapproved of their tenets. The
yonng lady who before asked the question, how we
ihonld like to become nuns, and whose name I
[have forgotten, was affected even to tears inconse-
quence of what passed, and begged them to desist,
[laying, ** They were saints, God*8 people, and the
chosen few ;** that they " secluded tibemselves, that
fhey might foUow the Scrptures more perfectly,
pray for the conversion of sinners, and instruct the
[ignoniitt ^ ^^ principles of religion.*' This

* By the term "ReligimiMS,*' I mean Uioae who oon-
[itltuted the Ursuline Community.
t By the word igmrant, is meant what they term

erotics.

UX MONTHS IN ▲ CONTENT.

eoiiTersation, with the solemn appearance of the
nnns, affected me very eeneibly, owing probably to
the peenliar state of my feelings. The impression
thns made remained on my mind several months *
and at the age of thirteen years and fonr months I
asked my parents if they were willing I shonldbe.
eome an inmate of the oonveni This proposition
my parents were inclined to treat as visionaiy; bat
they soon discovered themselves to be in an error.
Nothing of oonse^nenee was said on the subject •
bat soon after, owmg to the delicacy of my health'
and other reasons, it was deemed expedient forme
to visit my friends in New Hampshire ; and being
fond of retirement, this arrangement accorded yeiy
well with my feelings.

While in New Hampshire, I spent many plea-
sant honrs, which I think of with delight. Mem-
ory oft brings to view, and faithfully delineatesthose
honrs of retirement and happiness which I im-
agined I ahonld spend, were I an inhabitant of i j
cloister.

While writing this narrative, I often lament my J
little knowledge of history ; for, had I been more
acquainted with it, I do not think I ever shonld
have united myself to an institation of this nature.
But to proceed ; I never eonld prevail on my pi^
rents to say mnch on this subject I kept silenceJ
resolving in my own mind to become acquainted
with some one who would introduce me to the Sa-
perior of the Ursuline Community, but did not isk
any one till after the death of my mother. FnTi*
ous to that events I had become acquainted vithj
Miss M. H., ft domestic in Mr. H. J. K's '
Bear my father*! housOi in Gharlestown.

eiX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

After my mother*i deeease, while residing with
my father, my eistera being absent, Miss H. came
to our honse, and begged me to keep her as a do-
mettle a litfle while, as she had no place. She had
walked a great waj for the purpose of seeing Mr.
K., who had moTed away. This was in the fall of
1830. After consulting with my father, I conclu-
ded to let her stay. She f onnd me in great trouble
and grief, in consequence of the absence of my two
Toonger sisters, whom I yery dearly loved, and who
bid gone to reside with my sisters in Boston. Af •
terfomily prayers were over, and I about retiring,
I stepped from my room to see if Miss H. had ex-
tingmshed her lamp, when, to my surprise, I found
her kneeling, and holding a string of beads. I
lAed her what she was doing. She did not speak
for some time. When she £d, she said she was
laymg her '' Hail Marys.''* I asked her what the
** Hail Marys" were, at the same time taking hold
beads. She Uien said, ** I say my prayers
n {hese to the Blessed Virgin. My friends will,
if eoone, excuse my curiosity at this time, for I
lad never before learned their manner of praying
samts and angels. Before I left her, she show-
me an Agnus DeU which she wore to preserve
enelffrom the temptations of Satan. I cannot
lember aU the conversation which passed the
tday on the subject; but I learned that she

* CaiMie vtayer, tranaUUedfrom the Latln,'^" Hail.

'irjl ftiU or grace ; our Lord is with thee : Bleased art

on imong women, and blesaed is the fhiit of thy womb,

~n I Holy Maiy, mother of God, praj for us sinners,

and at the hour of our death. Amen."

[tlambof God^-a small piece of wax sewed up in silk
Ubifonnofaheart.

[fi:

BIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

htd been Aegnainted with the nnne in Boston and
was also aoqnainted with the Superior.

The first pleasant day, I asked her to accompany
me to the Superior, which she did, and appeared
by her questions, to know my motive. She intro-
duced me to the Superior in the following manner*
— We were invited by a lay sister* to sit, who af^
ter retiring, in a few moments made her appear-
ance, requesting Miss H. to see her in another
room. Soon after, the Superior came in, and em-
braced me with much seeming affection, and put
the following questions to me : — How long since
the death of my mother f Whether I ever attend-
ed the Catholie Charoh, or knew any thing of the
principles of their religion? What I had heard
respecting them— of their order— my views of it?
What progress I had made in my studies? Whether
I had attended much to history— knew any thing
of embroidery, drawing, or painting, or any other
ornamental work ? Whether I had ever assisted in
domestic affairs ? After which questions, taking my j
hand, she said, ** O, it feels more like a pancake,
than any thing else."f She inquired in what ca-
pacity I desired to enter the institution?— whether
as a recluse or a scholar ? Whether I had done
attending school, &c. ? I replied, that I did not]
consider my education complete—that I wished to]
go into the school attached to the nunnery, on thej

* Those nuns who are occupied In domestic afifairs. I
t This may appear laughable ; but as I intend to pnb-j
lish all which will be for the benefit of the reader, I can-f
not refirain from mentioning this, in order to show the
course of flattery, ftc, made use of by the Superior and
those connectecf with the establishment, to draw the in<j
experienced into their power, and mak^ them ocnver
to the religion of the Pope.

•IS MOVTHB IM A OOITVENT.

nme tennt ts other popili, until I had made anffl-
eient progresa to take ue Tail, and become a re-
^lQg0^fhat my father waa ayerse to my becoming
I Attn; bat 1 waa of opinion, that he would con-
ear with my episcopiu frienda, in not objecting
(0 my becoming a pupil. In the conrae of the in-
terview, the Safierior conyersed mnch apon the
SoripfcUMt and mtimated, that I ought to make
my sacrifice, if neceasary, to adopt the religion of
the CroBB^repeating the worda of our Saviour,
» Ha that loveth father or mother more than me,
iinot worthy of me, &c.*|

At a Bobseqaent interview, the Superior desired
me to Bee the Bishop or Clergy, remarking, she be-
lieyed I bad a vocation for a reUgioua life, and the
I Bishop would tell me whether I had or not She
alio asked if I was acquainted with a Catholic
friend who would introduce me to the Bishop, and
mentioned a Mr. R. who would introduce me to
him. I was unacquainted with Mr. B., but had
IBeen him at my sister'a house in Boston. She said
thit the Bishop or Mr. R. would also discuss the
imitter with my father, and reconcile him to Catho-
Ifidty. After consulting some frienda who were
|in foyonr of the Catholic religion, I consented to

eelfr. B.; who, being requested, called at my
(atiier's, gave me some Scripture proofs of the in-
^Ulibility of the Romish church ; as, ** Thou art

, and upon this rock I build my church, and

e gates of hell shall not prevail against it ;" and

WhoBC sins ye retain tiiey are retained, and

hose sins ye remit they are remitted.'^ " He

will not hear the church, let him be to thee aa

heatlien man and a publican/' He (Mr. R.) de-

SIX MONTHS IN A OONYEMT

sired I would ssorete the paper upon which the
texts were quoted. He then took his leave, sav.
ing he would oall to see me in town soon at th«
Misses S.» when he would introduce me to the
Bishop.

I will here remark, that proTious to my joininel
the community, I heard of many miracles wrouffht
by Catholic priests. Mrs. G. brought a lady one
day in a chaise, to show me her eyes, which were
restored by means of a priest, Dr. 0*F. She, as
Mrs. G. stated, was totally blind ; but having faith
in miracles, she knelt to her confessor, requesting
him to heal her. After touching her eyes with
spittle and holy oil, she immediately ** received
her sight*'

Before the next interview with the Superior I
Tisited my Protestant friends, the Misses S., when!
Mr. B. cfJled and proposed to introduce me to thel
Bishop. He accordingly accompanied me to thel
Bishop's, and introduced me as the young lady whol
wished to become acquainted with the tenets of]
the Church, and recommended to him hy the hon*|
oured Mother the Superior, with directions forhisl
ascertaining my vocation as a fit subject for a re*!
duse. The Bishop asked me if I knew the mean*]
ing of the word " Nun ;*' how long I had thooght
of becoming a nun; my opinion, and the opuioaj
of my friends in regard to Gatholioity; and asmj
feelings were easily wrought upon, more partica-j
larly at this time, questions were put to me, whicli
more mature deliberation leads me to think we
put under the impression that I was very ignorant,
and which were very unpleasant for me to answer.]
He even went so far as to judge my secret thought

SIX MONTHS » A OONTBVT.

njiBg he knew what was Chen pMNdng in my
BT iSnd. I then took mj leaTe, nndeoiaed what
«oano to pnrsae, and very Utile edified by the con*
lenation of the Bt. Bey. Bishop. The Bishop
mye direelions to Mr. B. to purchase a catechism
of the Cafholio Church in the diocese of Boston,

SiUished with the approbation of the Bt Bey.
ishop Fenwick, which I ref ased to accept
Abont a week afterwards, I called npon the Sn-
perior, and made her acquainted with my conversa-
tion with the Bishop, likewise with my refusal of the
dteeldsm. On learning that my desire was still
itrong to become an inmate of the convent, she
ndlingly said, that for one so young as I was to
wiih to seclude myself from the world, and live
the life of a religieutet was impossible. I remark-
ed, I did not like the Bishop so well as I expected.
She exclaimed, *' Oh ! he is one of the servants of
[God; he did so to tiy your vocation ;" and said
ihat I should like him the better the next time I
liawhim.* After recommending me to pray for
grace, die caused me to kneel and receive her
[blesdng; after which she embraced me, and I te-
Itamed to my father's house. I shortly after visit-
led the Misses H. in Gharlestown, and was intro-
[dnced to Mrs. G., who was acquainted with the
lets of the Catholic Church, and also with Mr.
). the Catholic Priest After a short acquaint-
nce with her, I was requested to converse with
ir. B., the priest, which I did, and liked him very

* I did like him the next time that I called upon him,
ttrheooiiTeTBedin the most solemn manner, and after
uning my name» said, **I8 it possihle thAt you have
i Hint's name I" and gave me St. Teresa as my namesake,
Ibtftutifttl wax flgore habited as an Uiiuline nun.

SIX MONTHS ni ▲ OOlTfBNT.

mneh. He tlso fnpplM mo with books, from
which I leamod that I ooght to Tonerate tnd n-
ceiTO tho religion of the Oatholie Camroh m the
only ofM and true religion.

On Good Friday evening, I heard the most affect-
ing Catholio sermon* I ever listened to, upon the
Passion of onr Divine Redeemer. I soon after
visited at Mrs. G's, where I saw a fine drawing, ex.
hibitinff the peaoefnl and flonrishing condition of
the Holy and Apostolio Chnroh, ontil the time of
the Reformation, nnder Martin Lather. Mrs. 6.
reoonnted the saflTerings of the Catholic Chorch in
eonseqnenoe of this '* pretended reformation.'' My
friends will understand, that by this time I had
beeome a constant visitor at the convent On b^
ing sent for at one time by the Superior, I met the
Bishop at the eonvent, who was playing with the
dogs ; at the same time, the Snperior, hastily ap-
proaching, embraced me in the most affectionate
manner ; as she did ever afterwards, when I yisit.
ed her at the convent. She introduced me to the
Bishop again, who did not appear to recognize
me, and said that I was sister to the lady who
visited him in Boston. At this time Itiionghtthe
Superior and Bishop the most angeUc persons
living, and, in one instance, gave way to auger in
conseqnenee of hearing a few words spoken against
them. On being told that my mind remained still
the same, the Bishop remarked, ** I will pray for
yoQ ;** and recommended to me the advantage of
continning under the instruction of the priest, and
said he should like to see my father or sister.

* I had before attended the lectures in Boston, at the I
time of the controveraary between Dr. Beecber and (bej
t'athoUoi.

UX MONTHS Ilf A GONVBMT.

After the interTiew with the Bishop, I return to
BT faUier*8, who was mnoh displeased with the
iteps I had taken, and bade me renounce all oon-
Ineuon with the Catholics, or leave my friends.
(This he said in a moment of ezoitemeni) But
[beingiomach attracted bj the apparent holiness
of the inmates of the convent, and viewing this as
the only tme chnroh, I wished to become a mem-

Iberofii

Perhaps it will be proper to state some of Mrs.
Iq'i eonTersation. After hearing from her a plea-
[ling scoonnt of tiie life of a non, d?o., I mentioned
shoold like to become one, and would, if I could
Bvail on my father and friends to consent ; but
less I oonld, I must despair, as they would not
I willing to advance the money which would be
leeded to go there. She replied, ** It is not money
iiatwUl ever induce them to take you ; it must all
the work of God." She asked me what my
^ueh friends* said upon the subject On my
piling her that they were reconciled to my enter-
^ the institution, particularly as a scholar ; that
liey liked the seclusion of the convent, d^c, Mrs.
). stated that she could not see the least objection
I my following my own inclination. I then took
^y leave, promisiDg to see her at my fnend Mrs.
i'l. The next time I saw her, she advised me to
ive my father's house and all, for the sake of
She said she ^ould procure me omamen-
work, which would support me, independent
my relatives. Sue., which she did. I thanked
most heartily, and told her I thoujgrht I should

I* Mf fHends of the Epiacopal Church thought I could
pe the piivilege of writing when I desired to see thenn.

UX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

U happy if I w«» certain of goinc; to • dobtej
She i(tLi9 ma har. word that I ahonld. I then took
ap with har adyica» and left my friends, I thonsh
for life, as I had no donbt but that I ihonld loor
antar the Conyent, rasol?ing to leave all for th
love of Qad and to conieorate the remainder of m
daya to his servioe. I believed Mrs G. to be m
linoere friend, and an Epiecopalian, as she had if
waya told ma aha was, and placed myself under hei
protection. After visiting some Protestant friends
I found means to procure my clothing, &o., m
went immediately to reside opposite the Caiboli
chnrch. I employed myself while there in doini
ornamental work, for my Catholic friends, andalsl
in working lace for the Bishop, tiie altar, Ac.
About thia time I waa offered compensation, bui
refused it, and received a present of ten dollan,
crucifix, a pearl cross, and two books, with m
name stamped upon them in gold letters, vhiej
presents I received as tokens of Jrindness ini
friendship.* And wishing to deny myself of in
thing worldly, I gave up what jewellery I had, tell
ing Uiem I luiew of no greater sacrifice I ooold
that time make, than to give up all the treasi
my dear mother had left me. I also gaye my glol
and ffold-fish, which were a present to me. i
that tmie I thought I was holy, and conld hardl;

* I wish to have it understood, that the lettering i
these books was my new name, " Maiy Affnes Tereuii
My baptismal name, it will be recollected, is Rebecd
Theresa. The books were glyen me by Mrs. 0.. whoMi^
they were firom the Bishop ; and he afterwaros, in (b
convent, confirmed the statement. Baying, he knew i
that time of my vocation, and for that reason le&t me i
reiigioua name, which was a saint's name.

•IX MONTHS III A GOKYBNT.

)d. tbat the lettering
, ** Mary AsmeB Teresa.]
i recoUected, is lUibecc'
imebyMr8.G..w»w8S
nd ho afterwards, la tt
aent. Baying, he knew i
tor that reason lent me
it's name.

ipeak to ft Proteitant. I had nad muiT Ofttholio
ijooto. My time wai wholly employed in working
for the CAtholicf, ezoept my hdnn for meditation
md praven.

The 6fdinanee of baptiam* was admlniatered to
Bi by Mr. B., himseu and a Mrs. P. atandbg
iponion for me — ^my former baptism being eon-
£ered by the OatboUoi invalid, while in Charles-
towii» I stood sponsor for Mrs. G's danghter, of
whom I ibaU speak in the eonrse of this narrati?e.
I would here remark, had I taken np with the ad-
fiee given me by many of mw friends, I should not
DOW hsTS the nnpleasaat auty of relating these
fiots. But so it was : I had imbibed a refish for
whit I supposed to be *' real pleasnres," bnt which,
ilttl I bawe foond, by sad experience, to be like
I the " waters of Marah." At an interview with the
iperior, I was introdneed to two of the ** ehoten
iBeugiense, the mother assistant and Mrs. Mary
Benedict. The first qnestion asked was, what woid
llbionght from my fnends. On my hesitating to
[giTe an answer, die insisted upon knowing what
[fhey laid; on whioh I told her all they had said,
roid for word, as nearly as I could recollect ; also
16 idyiee I received from a Mr. E., which appear-
, to difq^lease her mnch ; and although she strove
roppress her feelings, it was evident she was
raoh displeased.

After some qnestions respecting Mr. E., the Svl"
rior remarked, he was none other than the man

* At the time of my baptism I was anointed with oil ;

[ttlece of salt was put in my mouth, the priest breathing
B times upon it, and touchinff my eyes, ears, and nose
I little, speaking Latin all the while. They profess

I take these ceremonies flrom the Scriptures.

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

whQ piail^^i^tldren's books. She also questioned
me "^jfj^np^vd to a conversation which took place
betweisn m^ brother and myself on Charlestown
bridge (which was published in the ** Jesuit "*
highly exaggerated), and appeared greatly pleased
with the langnage of my mother, saying, with pe-
cnliar emphasis, ** O, yon will die a martyr to the
canse of tenth, should yon die under perseoation."
I took my leave of her, promising to call again
when she should desire.

After this, she wrote a letter to my father, of the
contents of which I was then ignorant, but have
since learned it contained offers of two or three
quarters' schooling, free of expense. My father
says he treated it with contempt ; and his answer
by the bearer was briefly this — ** He wished me to
have nothing to do with that institution ; that my
friends wonld prefer my going to a Protestant
seminary.'' At my next interview with the Supe-
rior, she however told me, my father had become
reconciled to my remaining with them two or three
quarters, after which time, he would inform them
whether he could consent to have me stay there
longer as a teacher of music.*'f She previonsly

* I afterward asked priest B. to explain what it meant:
he said Dr. O^F. made a mistake in writing it for the
press ; and he promised it should be corrected.

1 1 attended music because the Superior desired it; and
she assured me there was no need of assistance from my
friends, even if my father had consented, for I could with i
my needle be of sui&cient use to the community to sup-
port myself without their assistance. She also told me I
should study when I chose, and might have the privilega
of coming into the Religieuse Ck)mmunity to recite to]
her.

A» J

VENT.

BIX MONTHS IN ▲ CONTENT.

I also questioned
which took place
[ on Charlestown
the "Jesuit,"*
)d greatly pleased
, Baying, with pe-
le a maxtyr to the
ader peisecntion"
ing to call again

to my father, of the

Ignorant, but have

rs of two or three

tpense. My lather

)t ; and his answer

L« He wished me to

astitution; that my

ing to a Protestant

new with the Snpe-

father had become

,th them two or three

would inform them

have me stay there

,»»+ She previously

■ explain what It meant:
8 to writing it for tlie
1 be collected.
, Superior desiredlt; and I
d of assistance from my
a8ented,forIcoiildw^lh
me community to Bupj
tt?e. She also toldmel
Slight have the privUW
Community to recite to

presented me with some slate pongee, which was
ihe uniform dress worn by the scholars in the pub-
lic apartments, telling me at the same time to pre-
pare myself, and haying my things ready by snch
A day. She asked me, if I should come without
the consent of my Boston friends, if I supposed
they would insert any thing in the public papers,
or make any disturbance, or come tihere for me ?
to which I replied, I thought not. After preparing
myself for a public reception, I visited ttie Supe-
rior, when she said, if I would place myself under
her care from this tame, she would protect me for
ever, and particularly from the persecution of the
« heterodox," and she looked to heaven above for
her reward.* She then stated that the Bishop had
concluded to receive me, not as a member of the
public department, but as a *< Novitiate,** which
would screen me from the questions of the Protes-
tant scholars. She also added, that I should be
received as the other sisters were, and that we
were to support ourselves by our talents and indus-
try. The names of the sisters were, Mrs. Mary
Ursda,t Miss Mary Magdalene, Miss Mary Joseph,

* I wish it to be understood, that being influenced by
the Superior and Mn. G's advice, after hearing Bomish
preacmng and reading their books, I went to board at
Mrs. ffs., opposite the Catholic church, where I employ-
id my time in ornamental work, visited the Convent
often, and informed myself as much as possible of a re-
duse's life ; lived as retired as the ** Charity Sisters," ex-
cept visiting some of my relatives three times, twice ao-
eompanied with Romish friends.

t Ifrs. If aiy Ursula came from New Hampshire, and
was received as Choir Beliffieuae. She was the eldest in
the community : this I learned firom the Superior, who of-
ten reprimanded her for saying many words in an uncoutU

H m

»?i

SIX MONTHS IN ▲ OOmTBNT.

and Miss Mury Anstin. The latter was both
teacher and pupil. I answered that I should like
those oondiaons best She then desired me to
kneel down and take the following obligation:—
" I do, with the grace and assistance of Almighty
God, renounce the world for eyer, and place myself
under your protection, from this day, to consecrate
myself to his honour and glory, in the house of
God, and to do whateyer obedience prescribes, and
tell no one of this obligation but Mr. B., in con-
fession.*' After this, 3ie Superior snmmoned two
of the *' Ghoir Beligieuse," who conducted me to
the garden, where they left me to amuse myseU.
Presently the Superior joined me, wishing to know
how I liked the garden, the flowers, &o. Observing
a pocket album in my hand, she asked what I had
hoarded up there— some worldly goods? She
took it, and examining it desired to biow if I wish-
ed to keep some money I had in it (fifteen dollars.)
I replied no ; as I was going to join them, I wodd
intrust it to her care. She also requested me to
sing one tune; I complied, and sung "There's
no£ing true but heayen.'' Her observation was,
she should wish me to commence immediately with
music. I then left the conyent, and attended the
sacraments of Confession and Communion; and
on Sabbath morning, August 7th, 1831, I was at-

rustic manner, (such as daoun for down, &e.) telling her
of her ignorance, Ao, She neyer reftised complying with
the rules, but, when reprimanded, would kneel at once,
and kiss the floor. I often wished to ask if she was hap-
py, hut dared not speak (without permission) to her.
Their proceedings appeared so strange, that I was in con*
Unual fear. The noVIcei fteqnently trembled when ap*
proaching " the Mother," particularly at confession.

!IT.

bter was both
I should like
desired me to

obligation:—
e of Almigbty
ad place myself
y, to consecrate
a the bouse of
I prescribes, and
Mr. B., in con-
r summoned two
onducted me to
[> amuse myself,
wishing to know
B,&o. Observing
Aked what I had
y goods? Sbe
to know if I wish-
it (fifteen dollars.)
oin them, I would

requested me to
I sung "There's
. observation was,
3 immediately with

and attended the
Communion; and
b, 1831, I ^w at-

^ &c.) telltag^J
Sse4 complying with

would kneel at once,

' r^rmiBBlon) to her.
nle thatlwaaincon.

f trembled wHen »p.
•ly at confession.

SIX MONTHS IN A CX)NyENT.

tended to the gate of the Conyent by my friend
Mrs. 0, I was shown into the public parlour by the
lay sister, and was requested to kneel and continue
my devotion until the Superior made h^r appearance.
She soon came, and made a sign for me to follow her.
She led the way into a long room, darkened, at one
end of which stood a large crucifix, made of bone,
which I was afterwards informed was made of the
bones of the saints. The Superior told me, in a whis-
per, it was the time of silence. Bat after arrang-
ing my dress, she took from her toilet a religious
garb, which she placed upon my head, and bade
me kiss it, saying it had been blessed by the
Bishop. She then pronounced a short Latin
prayer, while I was kneeling, at the same time
giving me her blessing. After this, she conducted
me into another apartment, where was a stranger
whom she called a Postulant,* and giving me per-
mission to speak, she left the room. A lay sister
then entered the room with refreshment, after par-
taking which, we had permission to walk in one
particular path in the garden. This stranger pick-
ed up a pear and began to eat it, and invited me to
do the same, which I declined, being acquainted^
with the rules of the convent, which were very
strict, as will be learned in the course of the nar-
rative. She did not regard the rules so strictly as
the Superior required, who, being made acquaint-
ed with her conversation by separately questioning
ns, sent her away, as she said, to another order ;t
bat I now know that this was not the case.

* Candidate for a recluse.

1 1 believed she had gone to another order; and after

8IX MONTHS IN ▲ CN}NTBNT.

To retnm to oar walk in the garden. The bell
rang, when we were immediately oondnoted to the
Beligiense Choir; and here the Superior cansed
me to kneel three times, before I eoiQd suit her.
After the performances were over, which consisted
of the office of adoration to the Blessed Virgin, and
prayers to the saints, repeated in the Latin tongue
of whioh I knew nothing, we proceeded to the re-
fectory, where we partook of our ** portions." After
saying Latin, we kneeled and kissed the floor, at a
signal given by the Superior on her snuff-box.
Before eating, one of the Beligieuses said, *<Iq
nomine Domini nostri Jesu Christi,"§ all making
ttie sign of the cross, and responding, ** Amen."
Aftor receiying our portions we performed several
deyotions, such as kissing the floor and repeating
Latin, while the ** Angelus " was ringing. We

returning to my sisters, told them so (together with my
pastor J that she was with the Sisters of Charity; when,
to my surprise, she called upon me, said she had never
thought of going to another order, and that the Superior
had not done by her as she agreed.

I In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. When oppor-
tunity offered, I asked the Superior to explain the mean-
ing. She said, in a very solenm manner, ' ' You must not,
my dear sister, give way to ewrioaity. Do you not recol-
lect it is against the ruUa for a Beligiense to do sot" I
answered, "Tes, MamereT and complied at once (by
kissing the floor,) when she ohserved : " A Eeligieuse
should never have a will of her own ; as she grew in per-
fection in the order, she would understand what these
words mean ; it will be revealed to you when you are de-
serving.'* She taught me to believe that the " Office of
the Blessed Virgm,** (which was in Latin, and which we
all repeated, without understandmg it,) was none other
^an that chanted in heaven by the saints around the
throne of the Almighty, and called the sweet communion
of "All Saints."

BIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

than went Immediately to the ^ Community.*' On
entering this room, the '* novices *' kneel and re-
peat the *' Ave Maria,"t ^^b the floor, and seat
themselTeB for recreation, according to the rales
given hy the Superior, entitled, ** Rules by the
Beyerend Mother." The following are the rules
whieh were enclosed in a gilt frame, and suspended
in the community; and it is the duty of every
novioe to read them at least once a week: —

1. To rise on the appearance of the Superior.

2. When reprimanded, to kneel at once and kiss
the floor, until the signal be given to rise.

3. When speaking of the Superior, to say onr
Mother; when speaking to her, and to the profess-
ed Choir Beligieuse, Mamere ; to say Sister, when
speaking to the Novices ; of them, Miss ; and of
the professed Choir, Mrs. ; to say ow or our%^ in
instead ^imy or mine,

4. To say '' Ave Maria " every time we enter the
eommnnity.

5. Before entering any room, to give tJvrtt knocks
on the door, accompanied by some religious ejacu-
lation, and wait until they are answered by three
from within.

6. Not to lift our eyes while walking in the
passage ways; also, never to iouoh each other's
hands.

7. To stand while spoken to by the Bishop or
Superior, and kneel while speaking to them; to
speak in a particular tone.

8. If necessary to speak to the Superior during
a time of silence, to approach her kneeling, and
apeak in whispers.

tHailMaiy.

\f..

.jfi^x

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

9. Never to leaye a room without permission
giving At the same time our reason.

10. To rise and say the ** Honr "$ eveiy time
the olock strikes, except when the Bishop is pre.
sent, who, if he wishes makes the signal

The following are the written *< Rules and Pen-
aneei ef our Holy Father, Saint Augustine^" to-
geUier with those of Saint Ursula, as near as I can
recollect. They are read at the refectory table
every week :—

1. To kneel in the presence of the Bishop, until
his signal to rise.

2. Never to gratify our appetites, except idih
his holiness the Bishop's or a Father Confessor'g
permission.

8. Never to approach or look out of the window
of the Monastery.

4. To sprinlde our couches every night with
ho^ water.

5. Not to make a noise in walking over tlie
Monastery.

6. To wear sandals and haircloth; to inflict

I *' The Hour.^0 sacred heart of Jesus I always united
to the will of thy Father, grant that ours may be sweeflj
united In thine. Heart of Mary I an asylum in the land
of our captivity, procure for us the happy liberty of the
children of Jesus. May the souls of the faithM depart-
ed, through the merits of Christ and mercies of God, mt
In peace. Amen."

The ahove Is what Is called an Hour ; there is a diffe^
ent, though similar one, for each of the twenty-four houn
in the day. They are written, and placed in two gilt
frames over the mantel-piece ; twelve over the heart of
MJury in one, and twelve over the heart of Jesus in the
othf'v. Every time the clock strikes, the one whose turn
it i% ii* lecture rises and says one of them.

SIX MONTHS IN ▲ CONTBNT.

iraysmiited
be sweetlj
n tbe land
erty ot the
Lful depart-
ofGk)d,iest

ei8adiffe^
y-fouihoon
in two gUt
lie beart of
esus in tbo
wbose ton

punishment upon onnelyeB vrith our gifdles, in
imitation of a Saint.

7. To Bleep on a hard mattress or coach, with
OM coverlet

8. To walk with pehhles^ in onr shoes, or walk
kneeling nntil a wound is produced. Never to
meh any thing without permission.

9. Never to gratify our curiosity, or exercise our
thoughts on any subject, without our spiritual di-
rector's knowledge and advice. Never to desire
1 food or water between portions.

10. Every time, on leaving the community, to
[take holy water from the altar of the Blessed Vir-
[gin, and make the sign of the cross.

11. If a Beligieuse priest in disobeying the Su-
dor, she is to be brought before the Bishop of

^e diocese, and punished as he shall think proper.
(e?er to smile except at recreation, nor even
^en contrary to religious decorum.

12. Should tbA honoured Mother, the Superior,
ttud %Reiigietue whose mind is occupied vdtibi
rorldly thoughts, or who is negligent in observing
lie roles of &e Monastery, which are requisite and

eessaiy to her perseverance and perfection in a

Hions life, she should inunediately cause her to

to her cell, where she could enter into a re-

, I shall now continue my narrative of the remain-
' of the first day. At recreation, the Postulant

jid I had permission to embrace in a new form,

ReUgieuse, After that, they congratulated me

my snccesB, saying they had ever prayed forme

they had heard of my yocation. The even-

; bell for the Latm office now rang, and we as-

SIX MOMTHB IN A CONTENT.

■embled at the ohoir, where we performed saeh
ceremonies as I before named, nntil the time of n-
tiring. As we were strangers, Che Saperior con-i
dnoted ns to the inflrmaiy, where other Novices j
were preparing to retire, and before leaving it bade
ns not to rise nntil we had orders. Next morninff
being holy-day morning, the bell rang at three, i^ I
stead of four, as it nsnnlly does, for meditation in]
the choir. While the Angeliu* was ringing at]
five A. x. we were called to attend Complin and
Prime, nntil half- past six; then Litany to the
Saints. Alter Litany, the bell rang for diet in tht
refectory, every morning, except Friday; o|i
which day we assembled for confession to the Sa-|
perior.

The manner of confession to the Saperior is
foUowr^:— The room is first darkened, apd oni
lighted wax taper placed npon tiie Superior*]
tlurone ; and she is considered as filling the pla
or station of the Blessed Virgin. After taki
their places in the greatest order and silence, th]
Beligienses respond. Then the lectoress reai
from a book, called Bnles from the UrsnlmeOide
by Saint Ursula, abont complaining of the eol^
onr clothing, food, &e., &c. They sit on tiie
feet daring tilie reading, a posture extremely pai\
fuL The reading finished, the Saperior whi
to the sisters to approach her separately, wB
they do ; each one in her turn approaches, and

{>eats the following : *' Onr Mother, we
ege that we have been gnilty of

* The Angelas is the bell rang while
three salutations and three Hail Marys.

fix MONTHS IN ▲ GONYBNT.

litilM of our Holy Ordift by lifting our ejes while
Uniting in <h« pMsage-wayi; in neglecting to
tike holy water on entering tiie community and
kbob; failing in respect to our Superior, and Tcn-
lention to oar Father ; failing in religions deco-
Iron, ind in respect to onr vows— poverty and
obedience ; for which we most humbly ask pardon
of God, penance and forgiveness of yon, our Holy
Mother.'' As each one finishes, the '* Holy Mo-
tier** gives her advice and penances, and her
lemg; they then kiss her feet and sometimes
. ke (he cross with their tongues on the floor ;
^en making their inclination, they retire to the
iovt to perform the penances.
After they are all assembled in the choir, the
teperior says, Kyrie eleison, and they all answer,
tfrU eUUon ; Ihe Superior says, ChrUU eleiion,
W Qiey answer, Chriite eleUon, &c., A». She
^en says Litany to the Saints in Latin beginning
ith <<Sancta Maria,'' and they respond, '*Ora
nobis," See. &o. This ceremony is very solemn.
I is performed until eight o'clock, a. m., when we
ei?e onr portion sitting on the floor. The bell
tt half -past eight for young ladies' recreation,
lien we attend to stndyunnlaquarter before eleven;
1 private lecture until eleven ; then bell rings for
examination of conscience till a quarter past
«n ; then for diet.* l^he services at diet are i&ter
eating Latin : — ^first, they seat themselves in or-
' upon a bench, flrst crossing themselves in their

{Ovdiet ooDBlated of the plainest kind of food, prln-
HVfeKetablea and vegetable soups, Indian puddmgs,
I Yeiy seldom meat. Our tea was made of herbs,
•tinss or the bitterest kind. We partook of this diet

SIX MONTHS m A GONVBNT.

appointad plaeei, on one side of a long narroi
table ; before eacb one lies a small linen napkin
servet, rolled round another smiUl cloth, oontaii,
ing a knife and fork; beside each semtii
plate containing the ** portion ;" then the Saperiol
enters and passes along to her table, at the hi
of the room, the nuns making their inclinatioQsi
she passes. She then makes a signal on hersnn
box, and the ** Religiense," whose turn it is
speak, says, ** Benedicite ;** the Superior anawei
*' Benedicite;** and so it continues, in a Bimil
manner, from one to the other, the " Efficient 'f
repeating a Latin prayer. The Superior th^
makes the signal for the lectnress to read from t
lives of the Saints and martyrs, while the otbe
are eating. When the signal is given, each oi
rolls np &e knife and fork in the napkin, and li)

in imitation of the Holy Fathers of the deiert to mortll
our appetites. Pumpkins, stewed with molasaes and i
ter. semd ns sometimes as a dessert. Occasionally \
had mouldy bread to eat. A very insigniflcant pieoel
butter was sometimes placed on our plates. The 8ui
riofs diet was far better than ours; sometimes it
sumptuous, wine not excepted. I ascertained this, i
occasionally, in turn, went round to gather the fragme
She sent me, on two occasions, some apple-paringsl
eat, as a part of my portion. Sometimes the Seligieof
deny themselves any diet ; prostrate, kiss the feet]
those who remain at table, performing various Undi
penance, while the others are eating and listening to j
reading. Iliose who have permission to deny thenu '
in the morning, take their work-baskets as they pa
the refectory, where thev sew by candle-light, as tbel
turess is reaiung. This has a solemn and impressiw {
pearance.

* The Efficient is one who repeats prayen, and
ates during the office, and serves at Mass.

BIZ HONTHB III A (K ?fVBMT.

ide of a long narroj
8maU Unen napkin
small cloth, oontaii
dde eacli lenetii
i ;** then the Saperio
iet table, at the hei
,g their inclinationB i
IS a signal on her snii
*' whose tarn it is
the Superior anawei
lontinues, in a «inul
ther, the "Efficient']
The Superior the
itnress to read from tf
rtyrs, while the otiie
mal ia given, each oj
|inthenap1dn,andlij

irs of the desert to morti
jwedwlthmolasaeaandi
Ldesaert. Occarionafly ,
very inslgniflcant plwej

on OUT plates. T^e,?<
an 01118 ; wmettaieslt
A I ascertainett tniB, i
and to gather the fragme
Sqb, some applejattopj
sometimes the mM
prostrate, kiss thejwtl
Srfonning various ktoM

rS^dlisteniiW
>„ni88iontodenytMmw

ork-basketBastlieypj
SemnandimpreBslwi

repeats prayei's.wi'
jrves at Mass.

Ill the found it— (ihay also op«n it si a aigai^i;)

tdihe one whoso torn it it to do io, ^fter kiiNiDg

floor, as a token of humility, takM frona the

.iwer a white apron and a basket aontaining a

ipkin, and after putting on the apron, bmshea

ke fragments from the tables into the basket, and

kM the servets, making her inclination to each

She then takes the articles off the Snperior'a

la, one by one, in a napkin, in a solemn man-

i. If any eatable fall on the floor, they mast

I taken np in a napkin, and not by any means

ih the bare hands.

lAfter this, the Superior makes a signal, and the

and before-mentioned religieute kneel in

of the floor and kiss it, and immediate-

and Join tiie otiiers in repeating the Latin

fen $ after which the lecturess rings the An-

Dniing this ringing, they all kneel and

1 it, then assemble in Sie community for ** re-

Dnring this they are permitted to con-

I with one another, but in a particular and low

I and only on such subjects as the Superior

giyethem. If she be absent, the conyersa-

I is oioally on the subject last read at the table ;

[ihey work daring the time.

recreation, pablic* lectures take place, and

DC o'clock the bell rings for ** visitation ** to

Itar, which, with the Vespers, occupy us a hour

[a haU. Then the Bosazy ia said. On hearing

ell again, we all assemble in the community,

I there is a ** point of prayer " read. Then

M occupy us until flve; meditation and re-

ublio Lecture means a subject read aloud by the

nX MONTHS nr A OONVBNT.

fleetion halt an hour longer; then the bell rinn
again for diet, where we go through the obserru-l
eea he! ore named ; then recreation f orty-fi?e ndn-
ntes ; then the MUtrwe^ during which the bel]
rings; then pohlio prayen in the ohoir; then the
Benedietui rings, and tiie lay sisters* oome up inn
to the ohoir. Matins, lauds, and prayers eontinQt
from seyen nntil nine o'clock, when we retire whili
the bell is ringing, except those who attend lesson]
and penances. This concludes a day and iti
▼ices. The same course was pursued every day]
except Fridays and Sundays, when there wassomf
variation.

I had become in about a week, apparently
great a faTourite of the Superior, tiiat althongh i
miss in duties, it was in a measure overlooked. Sli
would even reprimand the reli^euses for my ei
ample and my faults, one instance of which I \
give. Failing to arrange the Superior's toilet, i
seat, and cricset, it being my turn, one of ^be
ligieuses was reprimanded in my stead, and im
diately knelt and kissed the floor. After this I \
sent for to the Bishop's room, where the voa
ladies asemble on mass morning, and after m
ing, &c., the Superior asked me how things api
ed ; if they appeared as I thought they woald; {
I liked my food, d?c. Feeling a repugnance to i
swer her, she said ** Recollect yourself/' I
her I liked all pretty well, except my conoh.
left, telling me to beg the intercession of St. Ter

* One lay sister remains kneeling in the entrynntilj
get to the psalm called Te Deum, when she rings wlf
we are saying it. The Reljgieuses bow or kneel, Ac, \
do not Join in saying the omoe.

nX MONTHS ni A OONTBIIT.

tlieii the bell ringi
rongb the ob8enui-|
iUon forty-liTe min
^ring vhlch the bel
theehoir; thenUi<
eiete rs* come up in

Knd prayers conta
,vbeii we retire whUi
)Be who attend lesBoni

iea a day and iU "
s pursued every
, when there was somi

» week, apparentiy
erior. that altboTigh
easTire overlooked. SI
religienses lor my «
Btance ol wbiob 1

,e Superior^* tj^*^;
ay turn, one o! ♦^^^

ii my stead, and
leflooi. AJtertiiiil
:oom, where ttie 50
.ming, and after b
d me how things appei
thought they wouAd;
,liBg a repugnance toi

except myconcb.
iterce88iono!St.i«'

;i;^torintbee^^!
SSnwhen she rin»^

ah?workneel,&c.,
Loe.

The next day my oonoh was exchanged for a bet-
tor, sod the image of Si Teresa pat near it for my

vie*

Soon after I became an inmate of the oonyent,

ibe Bishop came into the community and said,
>*How does that little nnn ? And what have yon
done with sister Stimson ?" The Superior answer-
ed, that she was not fit for the order, and she had
lent her to the Sisters of Charity. (See note on
pigel60 He then addressing me, asked how I
luked Monnt Benedict. I said, ** Very well, my
fd/' He then said, ** 0, but you will have to
ive with the temptations between the good and
spirits;" and be tiien explained all the horrors
if Satan, and asked me where St. Teresa my name-
ike was, and if I bad read her life ; and told me
say, as she did, these words : — ** Now come, all
yon; I, being a true servant of God, will see
fhat you can de against me," by way of challenge
tiie evil ones, and beg her intercession. He
id me my sister bad been to see if I bad taken
i6TeU, or had any thought of taking it; and be
I might rest contented, as my friends would
inble me no more.* He then told me the differ-
between a holy life and a worldly life ; said,
deril would assail me as be did St. Teresa, and
e me think I ought to go back to the ivorld,
make me offers of worldly pleasures, and pro-
me happiness. In order to prevent this I
watch and pray all the time, and banish on-
ly worldly thoughts from my mind, and throw

11 have lince learned It was my sister and another
1. They say he told them I had not taken the veil,
hoped I soon would do it.

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

holy water at the evil spirits, and challenge them
to eome if they dare. Perceiving the unpleasant
effect this had on my feelings, he poartrayed in
lively colonrs the happiness which would flow from
my resisting the evil spirits, and what a crown of
glory would be placed upon my head by the
angels.

According to my confessor's orders, I took upon
myself many austere penances, &e, ; but the Sa-
perior noticing my exhaustion from this cause, re-
leased me from my austerities for a time, saying,!
was a favoured one ; and she gave me permission I
to rest while the others rose to say midnight ma-l
tins* and to hear mass. On the exaltation of the
holy cross, the Bishop gave us his blessing, we allj
kneeling in the community. In conversation witbf
the sisters, he remarked one had not a very plea-
sant countenance ; and he asked me how I wa
pleased with my teacher, saying, he hoped shepntj
a more pleasant countenance on while instmctinjj
me.

Once, while walking with the Bishop and
fior, we met a stranger, upon which the Sapeno
required us to turn our backs while she eonverse^
with him. After he left the garden, the Blsboj
and Superior held soma oonversation together apa
from us, of which I overheard the following vof
of the Bishop :— *' I fear he did not come here
cidentally, as he stated, but for some partici
purpose. ** Immediately the Mother-assistant ca
to me, saying, that gentleman looked very mne

* Midnight mass and midnight matins are said atui
during Lent, and midnight mass always on Christmi
This is a time of special humiliation and prayer.

IVBST.

1 ohaUenge them
ig the nnpleasant
lie poTirtrayed in
eh wottld flow from
I what a crown ol
my heftd ^y ^®

orders, I took upon
&c. ; laiit the Su-
itom this canse, re-
lor a time, saying,!
gave me permission
say midnigU ma- 1
the exaltation o! ihel
L8 bis blessing, we fttt
In conversation witt
had not a very pW
asked me bow I wm
ing, be hoped she pnti
on wbUe insttuctan^

the Bisbop and Supe
B vbicb the Supena
8 whUe she conveweq

Tgatden, the Bi^
.ersation together aH

%d the following WOP

aid not cotne hewj
,^t lor some paibc.
M:otber.as8i8tantca

lanlookedjery^

SIX MONTHS IN A OONYBMT.

like me, and asked me if he was not my brother ;
and having permission to look, I answered, ** No,
he is not** We then retired within the convent.
The Bishop observed to me, jnst before we went
in, that that gentleman looked no more like me
than one of tiie dogs of the convent.

I was particularly bnrt in witnessing the ansteri-
ties pnt on a religiense, named sister Mary Mag-
dalene, who came from Ireland. Once, while re-
eiting the offices, she, by accident, or losing
breath, spoke in a lower key than she should. At
a signal from the Superior, she fell prostrate before
her desk, and remained so for one hour, until the
office was finished, when she had permission to
rise. This was the first time I thought the Supe-
, nor had done wrong.* Soon after this, in private
[confession to the Superior, she appeared determin-
ed to know my thoughts, and put many questions
Ito me that were hard to answer. I would here re-
|mark, that this is the practice at auricular confes-
sion. She told me to beg the intercession of my
atron saint, of the Blessed Virgin, and Saint
Jisnla. I complained to her of my strength's faO-
ig, uid of my diet not being such as I was used
le replied, that a religieuse should have no
^hokti and that I should have left my feelings in
lie world; and she immediately imposed the fol-
Dwing penances : — to make the sign of the cross
the floor with my tongue, and to eat a criLSt of
[read in the morning of my portion. The first of

i* The Superior often made mistakes Sn repeating the
Hce, by endeavouring to repeat it without the book.
Bd I learned afterwards from Mary S^anoia. that the
'~erior did not understand it.

.'•^?

8IZ MONTHS IN A GONVUNT.

these penances I did not fnlfil to the letter, making
the sign of the cross with my hand instead of my
tongue.*

After this, ft daughter of my friend Mrs. G.
eame to the oonTent, and was permitted to spend
some time with me in private. I also had soue
trifles given me as presents from this little girl
and leave to send what word I wished to my friends!
This girl told me at tl^e time, she was coming there
to sc^hool soon ; I therefore sent by her my love to
my friends, informing them that I liked the con
▼ent very well, and should be very happy to see them,
if they would not speak against my religion.}

Soon preparations were made for my taking the
vow$ of a Beligieuse, a Novena (nine days' devo-
tion) being said for me, and for my perfection in a I
religious fife, and ijrayers for the conversion of my
friends. About this time my sponsor, the priest,!
visited the convent, and talked, as I then thonghtJ
like a godlike person. My reception was to take]
place privately f because we wished to keep my fa-J
ther ignorant of the manner in which I had
received, and because he might hear cf it, shoalij
it take place publicly ; as he before said, I was noli
eighteen, and he could prevent my going therej
They said he could not prevent me, as I was non
of age. I was perfectly happy at this time, and
presented the Superior with some lines of poetrf)

* I would state to the reader, that those things ven
received on my part with great repugnance ; but the So
perlor said they were to prove my vocation, and I sob
mitted without a murmur.

t This message my fhends never received, as I biii
since learned. I was deceived in regard to the frien(Iilii|
of Mrs. 0.

the lettei, making
nd instead ol my

f Iriend Mrs. G.
lennitted to spend
X t^BO bad some
.om this litUe girl,
isbedtoinylriends.
be was coming iheie
atbybermylo^eto

lat 1 Uked tbe con
>ry happy to seetiiem,

at my w^g^^'i't ^,
ie lor my taJang fee

nft (nine days' dwo-
lotmyperfccUon^ia

Itiie conversion ol my
V sponsor, tbepneB,

t^tion was to tajje
wished to keep my H
Tr^bicb I bad bd

'thtbearoiit,8liou^
before said, 1 J«b.^

KSv atNbis time, «n^

8IX MONTHS in A CONYENT.

which gave her proof ol my sincerity and oontent-

BieBt*

She appeared very mnen pleased with the verses,
embraced me very affectionately, and expressed her
hearty approbation of my perseverance in perform-
ing the duties of the order, and said the request
for her entreaties that I might persevere in a re-
ligions life should be granted, and she would show
the Imes to the Bishop. She accordingly did so,
when he was present one day, and he said he must
write my conversion, for it was so much like St.
Teresa's, my namesake. After this, she gave or-,
ders to have all my worldly dresses, being ten in
number, and other articles of wearing apparel, al-
tered for those young ladies whom she clothed and
edueated ; and for me she ordered a long habit to
be prepared, which was to be blessed by the
lishop ; also a veil which they said denoted pu-
ity and innocence.

One time I failed in rising at the Angelns,*

hich was not noticed by the Superior. The next

ioming a Religieuse did not rise until the ring-

gofthe Angelns, and when she came into the

[eetory we were at diet. She brought her pillow,

d kneeling, kissed it, and said as follows : — ** I

;?e neglected to obey the commands of the Supe-

ior, and have not risen until the Angelns, which

am most heartily sorry for ; and I humbly ask

of God, and penances of you, our holy

itber.'* The Superior said no one who disobey-

her commands should be permitted to remain in

*Vy time was to rise at Angelus, which was rung at
Mhilethe Religiuses rose at four, except on holy-day
^'~~, when they rose at three.

lluaiji

iff

Ml B I

■

SIX MONTHS IN A GONYBNT.

this monastery. Her penance was to kiss the
floor, and remain kneeUng until lecture and diet
were over.

The Bishop, abont this time, came to examine
our work, &c. After hearing ns sing, he compli-
mented ns ; said he should hardly have thought
that I could have learned of heretics to sing tud
work so well ; and desired me to learn him to work
lace, as he feared I should not finish his robe for
Christmas. After being presented, as nsnal, with
wine, he retired. The Bishop's wine is presented
in a golden cup. The religieuse who presents it
remains kneeling until he has drank it.

As was usual on Saturday evening, after signify-
ing our obedience to the Superior, by prostrating!
and kissing the floor, we received permission to
visit the ** sanctum sanctorum " on Sabbath mon-J
ing, to receive the Eucharist, all of ns except my]
teacher (the one who the Bishop said did not lookf
pleasant, and whom I saw in tears on Sondav
morning.) The Superior made a signal for me
follow her into the Bishop's room, when, first in<|
quiring into my feelings, as she usually did, sh^
asked me what I thought of my teacher; if 8li4
^ad put any questions to me while at my lessoi
and how long before I thought I shonld be able
pronounce my vows, and take charge of a chus i
IHisic. She asked me, at another time, what
thought was the reason of my teacher's crying-
Cher name was Miss Mary Francis). I replied,
I did not know. She said it was the operation
the Holy Spirit, and her devotional feelings we
very deep.

The next day, while we were at onr recreatioii

SIX MONTHS IN A CONTENT.

Miss Mary Francis atipeared in great distress from
Bome caase, and in tears. She soon after pencil-
led a few Unes, and approached the Snperior kneel-
ing, &c, and presenting the paper. She appeared
confused and very angry, and bade her take a seat.
After this, the Superior thought it necessary for
me to retire to the infirmary and take an emetic,
which I did tiie next day. The day after this I
had orders to take medicine, which I was averse
to; and on my declining, the infirmarian* made
the sign of the cross a number of times, and told
me it was the Superior's orders, and I could not
tToid taking a part of it. I remained in the infirm-
mary two days without a fire, and the weather was
Terj cold. I had then permission to go to the
eboir, where I immediately fainted, at which the
Superior was angry, and said in a whisper, she had
[told me I ought not to have any feelingt.
For a while, sister Mary Francis was not pre-
lent at the office and recreations as usual, and the
loperior gave as a reason for her absence, that she
ras ill But it will be necessary for me to leave
[or a moment Miss Mary Francis, and speak of
188 Mary Magdalene. The latter was put over
6 as a teacher, in the room of Mary Francis,
hom I then supposed to be sick ; but I afterwards
ed that she was confined, that she might have
better opportunity to clear herself of the temp-
itioiis of Satan. Sister Mary Magdalene told me
e was about to leave this world, and wished to
TO me some advice. She said she thought it

[*The Inflnnarian is one who tends upon the sick.
I M well aa usual when I took the emetic

tv-

sn MONTHS W * COir^NT.

.. Ml t^ taVe het to Wm«eU. Alter w-
WM Goa'8 *in I? *•" °egt due to the Snperiot.Md
fflinding »f. »* *"• ?!*°"t IdBring the floor in the
oi my »^«««»fi "tog tip whSe ^«mag in th,
choir, wd of «y »^^» 5 BiBter Mary Francis;
^J"**^ »h^%oKon be able to give leeeons u
Bhe said Bhe *?"'", 4. imow which of the nomra
fcetore ; but J>**tert rS^ttou for ardigioueliJ.,
I thought had *^« »«»; ^^st Ukely to return to
and whidi one ^°^* ^, i wpUed, " Sister M»j
the world. To *>»« l»tt« * f ^4 .,,, 354 ^ot .p.
FrwiciB.'' She Mked why. ^i.b ^_^ ^^^^ ^^^^

pear to ol>w'^% »v jTiranid be any inducementte
Ihe aeked «• rf ^'^ ""^^ TuJ She .ppeued
»»•• ^ '??^!:'bdk bitnotwithBtandingherweA
quite unable *» '«*'.''^j£ gVie Bewed «U the time.
State and tl*"'''^^^ to see her diet«»8 het-
I told berit ^'« "iCempbaBis ^e said, "Si^
-« -^US^/rCdt . U affecting .-«

„ade the sign »* *" ^^^e day. in the hon» dl

Vrhae at my ^f^'^ *a Mother-aBeiBtant m,\

Bllenee. the ^^V^^^^IZ» MisB Mary M

^iahlBg «« t» *f .^*nor«*n her. They lehtta

yiu. l'*J?^*l„ wKseMaryFrandBentewa,!.

«»«• ^ ^««rioifoUowId.ai'«l«>^8''"H
tears. '«\« S'?!S'iolenily. threatening to pmj
the arm, *ook her vioien^^ wished she had i«^
S^herfordiBobe&enc^and'^ ^^ ^^

austere f«S?'Li vou'disedily'MissMatjij
- S^.r sK^ Sd herno/tojei^

IB the name of lome oww—*^
^as my luvme*

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

ftgain, bat to show by her appetite her iUness.
After the penance of kissing the floor, &e„ she
gave her a number of prayers to copy for the Pro-
testant scholars. And from that time we were
watched with the strictest scmtiny. The next day
the Saperior gave me permission to write to my
father. She said Miss Mary Francis was crazy,
and she should not keep her in the convent more
than a month longer, if she did not reform. Mary
Francis' grief will be well recollected by those in
the public apartments. The next day I wrote to
my father. The letter* was corrected by Miss
Mary Francis, who was not crazed, as stated by
the Saperior. I then whispared to her (it being
the time of silence,) and asked the cause of her
grief. She wrote on a slate, **she could not"
Areligieuse was in the room, watching ns very
narrowly, and to mislead the religieuse, she re-
minded me of making false syntax. We next
met in the community for recreation. The Su-
perior gave the Mo&er-assistant permission to
speak (Miss Mary Francis was absent.) She be*
gan by asking how she did. The Superior an-
swered, *' She goes on in her old way ;*' and oh-
ir?ed that she was unfit for the order. The Mo-
er-assistant said, '* O, Mamere, let me pray, at
least, a month longer for ^er \** and turning to the
oyices, asked them s ^oin with her. The Supe-
ior granted her permission, but handed her a let-
ir to read. The Mother-assistant turning to us,
id, " Sisters, pay attention. This letter is from
Mary Francis' aunt, Miss I, of New York."

* Thii letter was never received by my father.

SIX MONTHS IN A OONVBNT.

The substance of it was, that she had received her
(the Superior's) letter, and was sorry to have re-
commended to her that person, bntshe thought she
had reformed, and would be a suitable member for
a monastery; and she begged pardon forintro-
dueing one to her who had disturbed the peace of her
little community, and hoped, if it were possible
she would not long be troubled witii her, &c. The
Superior said, after the dose of the letter,** Sisters
you may still continue to pray for her, and I will
see about this thing, as it may be a temptation of
the adversary." Two or three days after this, I
met Miss Mary Francis at my lessons in the com-
munity, and again asked her to tell me her distress
by writing on the slate, or I would tell the Sape-
nor I oomd not learn of her. She begged I would
not, and told me she was under a solemn obliga-
tion not to make known the cause of her griet
She asked me il I was happy ; I told her I was
not, to see her unhappy, and again entreated her
to tell me the cause of her tears. She said I most
not tempt her to break her promise, for if we were
detected in conyersation, she would be made still
more unhappy. I then asked, if shehadrecoyered
from her illness, why she did not go to her class,
Sto, She said the Superior had forbidden her, bat
the could not answer any other questions. I had
formed a strong attachment for this lady, and it
gave me pain to see her so distressed.

At next recreation, the Superior sent ns word to
meet the Bishop in the meditation garden. Sister
Maiy Magdalene being too exhausted to walk u |
fast as we did, the Bishop asked who that was;
and being told, he burst into a laugh, and

JONVENT.

8IZ MONTHS ni ▲ CONVENT.

'< Sister ^^^^^^^^'^^^^ are yon going to heaven f
Shi replied, in a Toice scarcely andible, <* I have
DO will of my own, my lord ; whenever it shall
pleue God to take me."* She thought she should
not live to see Christmas. We then assembled in
{he community, and when all were seated, the
Bishop inquired, ** Where is that sober-faced nun ?'*
Being told by tiie Mother-assistant that she was
dying lessons to Miss F., he took the letter before
spoken of, and looking it over, handed it to the
Mother-assistant, saying, *' Why do you keep her,
and why does she not go to her class ?" The Su-
perior said tiie young ladies were not pleased with
her as a teacher. He asked if all disliked her.
Miss Mary Benedict replied, <* No, my lord ; some
in the French class appear to like her. On which
he said, ** show them tiiat letter."

At my next lesson, I told Mary Francis, if she
did not explain to me the cause of her grief, I
should tell the Superior ; for I could receive no
benefit from her instructions while she was so con-
fosed, and the Superior had reprimanded me Ifor
not leaming my lessons; and I promised, if she
would tell me, I would not inform the Superior.
She replied that she could not answer me then, but
would think of it, and give me an answer in the
iftunoon. Accordingly, in the afternoon, a reli-
gieoise being present, watching us, she communi-
cated what I desired to know by writing on a slate,!

* It Is here to be understood, that sister Mary Magda^
[Ime was in a consumptioii. ana had entered the convent
Inine months before in perfect health. She was worn out
with austerities.

t We were at the piano ; she pretended to write notes.

iill

11: T ipf

||||

III;

illi ilii !

tilinilil ^

ill m

BiSH't'Ss I'll' 'Imn

MnBi<tlf iiW HI: 'KRfr

mm 'Uliil IwB

Wm jiffilliHB'

'llHu''ijikiKl4iHSfl

lH|nn^mj

Wan '|i| H^HS

BIX MONTHS IN A OONYBNT.

and deaired to know if I was happy. I answered
I did not like tho Superior bo well as formerly. She
then wrote, that whilo at prayer and meditation
she oonolnded it was her duty, particularly as I wag
disj^atisfied, to give me some advice, and consider-
ed hc^ promise before made as not binding ; and
reoeiviikg for me a promise of secrecy, she proceed-
ed to say that she hoped she should be pardoned if
any thing wrong was said by her, as my wholehap-
piness depended on the words she should comma-
nioate. *' I am," says she, " kept here by the Sa-
perior, through selfish motives, as a teacher, under
a slavish fear and against my will I have written
several letters to my father, and have received no
satisfactory answer ; and I have for a long time
felt dissatisfied with my situation. The Superior
has failed in fulfilling her promise, not complying
with the conditions on which I was received*
which were, that as she was in need of a teacher|
particularly in French and mnsic, I might take tibe
white veil, and leave whenever I choose ; and my
taking the veil, * as it was only a custom,* should
not compel me : and that my obligations shonldnoi
be binding. My father thinks I can leave at any
time, for I do not believe he has received my let-
ters ; and that letter you have heard read as Miss
Vb, is a forged one." We were here interrapted
by the entrance of the Superior, who made a sign
for me to follow her into the Bishop*s room. After
askisig me how I progressed in my lessons, and
hearing me read in the ** Novices' Directory/'* she

* Tliis is a book which is used only In convents. Itdl-
lects UB to respect the Bishop as a represeutaiive of tiia

ONVENT.

glX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

observed that I looked meUnoholy, and command-
ed me to tell her the reason. I replied that I did
not feel well, that my longs were sore since taking
the emetic,* &o. She said that was only a notion,
ind bade me tell the true reason without any more
MiuTOcation. My words were, I did not loye hor
so well then as formerly. She exclaimed, *< my
ehild, I admire you for yoor simplicity ;" and ask-
ed me my reason for not loving her, which I de«
fliined giving. She commanded *' obedience '* with
leeming mildness, and I told her that I thought
she did hot pay that attention to me she had pro-
mised, and that she was not so kind to me as for-
merly. She then said, a religieuse should have no
will of her own; thi^t their Superior put many
things upon them, in order to try their vocation.
She then recounted the sufferings of a certain
taint, and bade me pray to that saint for protec-
tion ; and i^owed me a phial, which she said con-
tained some of Saint Teresa's tears ; and said, if I
woold save my tears while in devotion, she could
tell by them whether I should ever arrive to the
perfection of a saint She then gave me her bless-
mg, and reminded me of my reception, which was
soon to take place.

Snon of ChriBt. and in confession as Christ himself; and
e Superior as nilfllling the office of Mother of God.
* My lungs were also very sore in consequence of re-
peating the offices, so much so, that when present at re<
creation, when I had permission to speak, it gave me pain
lather than pleasure. I have, since leaving the convent,
consulted several physicians, who have expressed it as
their opinion, that the cause of my bleeding at the lungs,
which frequently ooours, was originally the repeating the
office and other services, in one long drawling tone, which
any one can know, by trying to be very difficult.

a SIX MONTHS IN A OONTRNT.

At my lesion in the aftenoon, I agsin oonvened
with Mary Francis oonceming; the letter, and re-
qnested her to inform me how my happiness was
concerned. She said still that the letter read to
the commnnify was a forged one ; that Mrs. I. wag
her aunt and sincere friend ; and did her father
know her sufferings, and the treatment she receiv-
ed from the Superior, he would prosecute her*
that she feared me Superior as she did a serpent!
She then advised me not to bind myself after my
three months' ** test'' or trial* to that order, by
complying with the rules of ** reception,'' any 'far-
ther than would leaye me at liberty to go to ano-
ther if I ehose ; and I must not think, becaase
they were wicked, that the inmates of all convents,
were so. I assured her, that although I had
thought that there was none good but Catholics, I
now believed there were good and bad among all
sects. She then requested me not to betray her,
and told me the Superior intended to keep me
there for life, and she thought it her duty to warn
me of the snares laid for me. She disliked that
order,} and wished me to inform her why, and in

* When penoDM first enter the convent, they take an
obUgation that thev will spend the remainder of their
days as a recluse, but they are put on a three months'
" test," or trial, to see if they hav3 a *' vocation " for that
particular order ; if not, they are generally placed in an-
other.

} Miss Mary Vrands was educated, I believe, in the
convent of Saint Joseph, Emmetsburg; also known ai
the order of the " Bisters of Charity." She possessed an
amiable disposition and superior talents, and was uni-
versally admired by the inmates of the school ; and w
far as my acquaintance went, she was deserviog the ei-
of ever? one.

SIX MONTHS m A CONTENT.

whit maimer I had eome there. I related to her
th0n, iBd dnriog the next afternoon, all the partien-
lin. She appeared yery mnoh anrprised to learn
that my friends had heen opposed to my coming,
18 tiie Superior had told her that they had put me
there for life. She said she had been taken from
the public aparbnent, becanse she had been seen
weeping by the vonng ladies ; that should the Sa-
perior refuse to let her go, she should, if possible,
make her escape ; and named a religiense (Miss
Maiy Angela) who had made her escape before.
She desired me, if she should be so fortunate as to
make her escape, to ask, in private confession, per-
mission to see my friends, and consult them about
going to the ** Sisters of Charity ;'* and if they
were wiUing that I should go, she would procure
me a situation, and by letter inform me of it. She
was in great distress on account of that letter,
whioh plainly unfolded the motives of the Supe-
rior. She said she should appear as calm as pos-
sible, as it was the only way to blind the eyes of
the Superior, and enable her to escape; and re-
quested me to give her all the information respect-
ing the Superior's intention that I could learn, and
to listen to her and to the Mother-assistant's con-
versation in recreation hours.

At recreation, the Superior observed that Miss
Mary Francis had a vocation for a religious life,
as she had refused to attend the offices and prayers.
At our next interview, I inquired of Mary Francis
if she had refused to attend prayers. She replied,
no ; that the Superior had discovered her inten-
tion to escape, and had forbidden her attending
oIBms, eonununion, and confession, for exposing

'•a':i:!

(I '

. II..'

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

her feelings before the religiense ; and that the
Superior had imposed penanoe upon her, forbiddisff
her to walk in the garden dnring recreation; and
that the presents given her by the young ladies
had been, with tiie Superior's permission, taken by
some one from her desk. She remarked, that we
were exhorted to love and pray for those who spite-
fully nse QS, bnt she could not love the oommnnity
generally, they exercised so much cruelty towards
her ; that the treatment she received was for no
other reason than because she had given way to tears
which were a great relief to her. She was happy,'
she said, to find one who sympathized with her,'
and who would not treat her with contempt, as the
others did. She said also, that the Superior had
done wrong respecting her apparel.

I have now eome to that part of my narrative in
which I must again speak of the sufferings of sis-
ter Magdalene. One day she came from the refec-
tory, and being so much exhausted as to be hardly
ahle to ascend the stairs, I offered to assist her, and
the Superior reprimanded me for it, saybg, her
weakness was feigned, and that my pity was false
pity. She then said to sister Magdalene, after we
were seated, in a tone of displeasure, if she did not
make herself of use to the ** community " she woold
send her back to Ireland. On which sister Maiy
Magdalene rose and said, '* Mamere, I wonld like
— "* The Superior cut short what she was going
to say by stamping upon the floor ; and demanding
who gave her permission to spet^k, impoBed on her
the penan c e of kissing the floor. The Snperiof,

* This, and other half-uttered expressions, conyineil
me that the wished to return to her friends.

gCC MONTHS IN ▲ CONVENT

ifterthii» impost hardships which she was hard-
ly able to snstaiii, frequently reminding her that
ihe had hnt a short time to work out her sal-
iTatioii, and that she must do better if she did
not wish to serve in purgatory. The Superior
qaestioned me about my feelings— wished to know
why I looked so solemn. I told her I was ill from
want of exercise, that I was not accustomed to their
liDode of living, &e. She said I must mention it to
|my eonf essor, which I did.
I The next time the Bishop visited us, he was in
lunuaally high spirits, and very sociable ; and he
lated seTeral stories, which are not worthy of
notice in this place. He again asked sister Mag-
lene when she thought of going to that happy
place, to reoeiye her crown of glory. She replied
Before the celebration of our divine Redeemer*!
|)irth, my lord.'* He said she ought to be very
^tnkful that she was called so soon.
I will here relate a conversation of the Bishop
rith the Superior at recreation hour, respecting
^8 Pope, &c. After talking a while in French, he
ud he had received a long letter from the Pope,
which his holiness congratulated him on his
lecess in establishing the true religion in the
^nited States, and made him offers of money to
Ivance the interest of the Catholic Church, and
^ore firaily establish it in America, &o. The
)p then spoke of the orthodox in Boston, and
id Dv. B. had got himself in a " hornet's nest,'*
om which he could not extricate himself. The
iperior named a sermon delivered in the North
mrch by an Episcopalian, and said they must
9k oat, or they would get themselvea into m *< hor-

'"II

8IX MONTHS nr A OOMTBHT.

net's nest" The Bishop mentioned a vidt of Dr
0*F. at Dr. B's., and said Dr. O'F. had searceljl

an opportnnitj to say a word, on aeoonnt of
the noise and orying of the children which were in
the room, and with which Dr. B. was playing;
said he appeared more engaged with the children
than with the snhjects of religion, &c., &e» Miss
Mary John, the Mother-assistant, exclaimed '<Is
it possible, my Lord, that a man of God is treated
in snch a way by heretics?*' ''Yes," said the
Bishop ; *' none bat he that is nnmarried carethl
for the things that belong to the Lordyhowhemayl
please the Lord ; bat he that is married carethforl
the things that are of the world, how he mayl
please his wife.'* The Saperior said Dr. B. pos-j
sessed very litUe sense, and had a weak mind. The
Bishop said that the a^ <tor, by the course he ha
taken, had made mt^ ^myerts to Catholicism;!
** and perhaps," said ^ e Saperior, *< he isawieke
instroment in the hands of Gh)d to bring abonij
good.*'

At another time, while walking on the conmi
gronnds, a cannon ball was picked up by one o^
the religieases, and the Bishop taking it obserre
as he gave it to the Saperior, ** Here is a Biitis
ball, that has killed many a Yankee ;** and he '
made seyeral other similar observations. At ano
ther time, tiie Saperior told the Bishop that twj
liiuies met iiear the convent; the words she o
were, " One Yankee met another, and said, ">
guesM yon are a going to independence,** " Ij
I be," said the other. Then they laughed h6artil]{
abont it, and gave as permission to hold oor i
creation apon it The Bishop remarked the Yi

SIX MOUTHS IN A OONTBNT.

keeieelebntecl independenee-day in honour of ffien,
lad appointid days of thanksgiTing, instead of
edebrating iht bir^day of ihe Redeemer, in hon-
onr of God, fte.^

^en I was again snmmoned to the Superior,
ihe inqmred, as nsoal, into the state of my feel-
ings ; and when I said I desired to see my friends,
ihe replied, ** Why, my dear Agnes, do you wish
to see worldly friends? Who do yon eall yonr
iriendsT Am not I yonr friend? Is not the Bishop
your friend ? If yonr worldly friends wished to
see J01I, wonld they not eome and see yon ?" I
lepUed <* Yes.*' A few days after this I was taken
very ill, and went to the infirmary. Miss Maxy
Fiimeis, hearing of my illness, made an errand to
I eome to ^e inmmary for some thread to mend her
[ipparel, and pretending not to find it, asked me
where tiie religiense pnt it, and desired to know if
I had any good news for her. I told her I had
not : but as we had permission to assemble for re-
lereation in the afternoon, I wonld, if I heard any,
[then inform her. At that instant a noyice opened

le door, and Miss Mary Franois exensed herself
pretending that irtie was looking for the basket

* We an had permission at one time to walk with the

taperior in the meditation garden. The Superior heard

^noiie behind the fence, and sent her servants tc learn

*^iesQ8e; they returned, informing her that two men

e lookine through the fence. The Superior remarked,

I Bishop had said there was great danger to be appre-

ddflramsuoh persons ; that if Protestants were to

any violence to them, the judgments of heaven

a all upon the wicked ; and uod had founded them

i anck so firm that it could not fall. The Superior

re radeis to the porters not to allow strangers to walk

"^ the grounds without her or the Bishop's pemUsslon.

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

of thread. We were not so strictly watched for a
few days as we had heen ; hat when Miss Mary
Francis exposed her feelings one day before Miss
Mary Magdalene and myself, we were again closely
watched. I then asked the Superior's pemission
to write to niy friends, and desire them to come and
see me, which she granted ; and also told me to
write whatever I jjleased. T prepared a letter ao-
eordingly to my sister, staiing that I did not wish
to retnm to the world, bat was anxious for a yisit
from them, ^c.

I began now to be much dissatisfied with this
convent My views of retirement, however, were
the same as ever, and I thought I would go to the
order of the Sisters of Charity, where Miss Man
Francis was educated, as she had promised to io-
trodnce me there. She told me, that shoald I
called to the public apartments, as an assistant ini
ornamental work, if possible, to slip a billet inb
Miss Ts. hand (a scholar from New York,) wh
would convey it to her ; and I must not open m
mind to my confessor until I was sure she had '
the community. I asked her if she would
letter for me into the world ; she replied, she
not, as the Superior would examine her, and sol
permit any thing to be carried from the oonri
into the world. We then laid the following
to mislead the Superior in regard to our intentioi
Miss Mary Fnmcis was to complain to the Sapeni
that I would not give proper attention when atm;
l€ssons, and I was to tell her that I could not
ccdve any benefit from Miss Mary Francis, oo
count of her grief and absence of mind. This
fulfilled to the letter. We also agreed on a sij

glX MONTHS IN A CONTENT.

bj which I shonld know whether she was going
with or wifhont permission. If she went without
pemkission, she was to tie a string ronnd an old
book, as if to keep the leaves together, and lay it
upon the writing desk ; if with permission, she
WIS to make the sign of the cross &ree times npon
berlipi. I had intimated my desire to go with
ber ; hat she said it wonld be more pmdent for me
(0 endeavour to obtain the Superior's permission to
lee some of my friends, and I could then consult
with them, and arrange matters to suit me. After
oor eonversation, she knelt at the altar of the
Blessed Virgin, and begged Gk>d to forgive ns if we
acted wrong in this matter ; and said to me, *< May
we not hope for pardon in this matter, if the Supe-
rior ean be so wicked as to approach the holy of
boUes and yet receive absolution ?** She then se«
keted from a book the letters forming her real
Dime, that I might write to her, should I not get
I ID opportunity to give a letter to Miss I. A re-
ligieose entered, and whispered her to come away,
liod I nevtt saw her afterwards.

When the Bishop next visited the ** community,*'
[be laid he understood that they were rid of ti^at
lenon who had cansed them so much trouble.
They all then rejoiced because Miss Mary Francis
gone. The Bishop asked whither they had
ent her. They answered, *< to her friends." No-
more at that time was said about it
Not long after this, at private confession, I was
koestioned very particularly in regard to my views
" lemaining there for life. I told my confessor
it I was convinced that the order was too austere
K me, and then I burst into tears. He 6ndea«

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

Tonred to comfort me, by saying I was not bound
to that order for life ; I ooald go to another oxiet.
I asked him if I might see my friends. He an-
swered, *' Tes." After receiving a promise from
him that I should go to any other order I chose, I
consented to take the vows. He gave me to under-
stand, that I need take no other vows than I should
at the convent of the Sisters of Charity. Mj re-*
ception took place the next day. I refased the
white veil, becanse the Sisters of Charity did not
wear it, and it was omitted. The choir was first
darkened, and then lighted with wax tapers. The
ceremony commenced with chants, prayers, respon-
ses, Sbo. a book was placed in my hands, which
contained the vows I was to take. As near as I
can recollect, the following is the sabstance of
them;—

''O, Almighty and Everlasting Qod, permit me,
a worm of the dnst, to consecrate myself more
strictly to thee this dav- in presence of the most
Holy Mother and Saini CJfrsidia, and all of tiiy saints
and martyrs, by living two years a recluse^ and by
instructing young ladies after the manner of Saint
Ursula, and by taking upon myself her most holy
vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience, whicb,{
with thy grace and assistance, I will fulfil.'^

They all responded '*Amen,'' and repeated i|
long office in Latin. I still continned to wear
black garb,* which the Bishop blessed ; alsoal
habit and a string of Rosary beads, which were also]
blessed by the Bishop. He wished to know
day, how Miss Mary Agnes did, after taking the |

* The apparel of a religieuse is always kisaed bytli^
wearer, every time of putting on and taking oft.

SIX MONTHS IN A OONYBNT.

vUti TOWS ; to which the Superior replied, " Very
well" He then oonvened ahoat the estahliBhment
in Boston, and said that some Sisters of Charity
were coming to constitute a convent either there
or at Monnt Benedict lower establishment.*

Meanwhile, sister Mary Magdalene was employ-
ed hi the refectory. According to the Bishop, she
was a saint, and he said there was a saint's body in
{he tomb (one of the late sisters) which remained
andecayed. I heard the Superior, about this time,
tell liiss Mary Magdalene tJ bum all her trea8iire,t
she would suffer in purgatory for her self love, and
she was afraid she &d not suffer patiently, for she
appeared romantic. Mary MagdiJene fell prostrate
it the Superior's feet, and said she would fulfil any
command that should be laid upon her. The Su-
perior gave her a penance, to kiss the feet of all
the religieuses, and asked them to say an Ave and a
Pater for her ; after which, she lay prostrate in
the refectory until the Angelus rung. One com-
mni^on morning, as I rose and was dressing, I
took some water as usual to rince my mouth, and
dl at once Mary Magdalene appeared greatly agi-
tated, and even in agony ; made signs and crosses
to signify that I should commit a sacrilege were I^
then to approach the communion ; and I then re-
eolleoted Ihat nothing must be taken into the mouth
on the morning before this sacrament I relate
I this to show the state of her mind. The Superior

*The Bishop, in confession, told me I could, If I pre-
[femd it, become one of these sisters.
1 t The treasures consisted of written prayers, books,

Rpen, a lock of her mother^s hair, Ac, which she brouidit
»m Ireland, and kept in her desk.

SIX MONTHS IN ▲ CONTENT.

one day veqaested the Mother-usifltant to get the
keys of the tomb, and to have a good place pre-
pared for Mary Magdalene, who forced a smile
saying, she should prefer her*8 near the undecayed
saint's bed.

As time passed on, the Superior became more
severe in her treatment, because I objected to par-
sue my music. My mind had been in such an nu-
happy state, that I for a long time found it impos-
sible to study : and further, I did not wish to re-
ceive instruction, for I had determined not to stay
there. I therefore succeeded in obtaining the Su-
perior's permission to occupy my time chiefly with
the needle, and assured her ttiat I would again
study when I felt better.

On one of the holy-days the Bishop came in, and
after playing upon his flute, addressed the Supe-
rior, styling her Mademoiselle, and wished to know
if Mary Magdalene wanted to go to her long home.
The Superior beckoned to her to come to them, and
she approached on her knees. The Bishop asked
her if she felt prepared to die. She replied, ** Yes,
my Lord ; but, with the permission of oar Mother,
I have one request to make." They told her to
say on. She said she wished to be anointed before
death, if his lordship thought ber worthy of so
great a favour. He said, ** Before I grant yonr
request, I have one to make, that is, that yon will
implore flie Almighty to send down from heaven a
bushel of geld, for the purpose of estahlisbing a
college for young men on Bunker Hill." He said
he had bought the land for that use, and that all
the sisters who had died had promised to present
his request, bat had not fulfilled their obligations;

8IX MONTHS m A CONVENT.

u md,** says he, ** yon mutt ihake lumdB in heaven
wifh all the datera who have gone, and be sore and
ggk ibem why they have not folfilled their pro-
mige, for I have waited long enough $ and con-
tinne to chant yonr office with ns while here on
eartbi which is the sweet eonimnnion of saints/'
After she had giyen her pledge, and hiised hii
feeU he told the several members of the eommn*
nity to think of what they should like best I was
fint called to make my request. I had never seen
iny thing of this kind before, and my feelings were
snob 18 1 cannot describe ; and continning silent,
the Snperior bade me name it I then said I lack-
ed hnmility, and should wish for that virtue, ^e
reUgienses then made their requests : one asked
for grace to fulfil the vow of poverty ; another, for
obedience ; a third, more fervent love for the Mo-
to of God ; a fourth, more devotion to a patron
saint; a fifth, more devotion in approaohing the
altar and host; and so on. The Superior ended
it by making the same request as the Bishop, add-
mg, the purpose intended was that the Gospel of
onr Lord and Saviour might be more extensively
propagated, and all dissenters mighj^^^ made to
torn to the true Church, and believe. The eon-
yersatien then turned upon the Pope, and the
Bidhop said the Pope would, perhaps, before long,
Tiiit tiiis country ; and when things were more
improved, and his new ohurch fijiished, he should
write to the Pope, &c. He went into a relation of
some parts of ecclesiastioal history ; spoke of the
Pope V being the vicegerent of Christ on earth ;
ana that although the wicked one prevailed now,
it wag designed for good, and the time would come

SIX MONTHS IM A CONTENT.

when all would look to the Pope as their Bpiritnal
director on earth. He thought that America
rightfully belonged to the Pope, and that his Holi.
ness would take up his residence here at some
future day.

Not long after this, Mary Magdalene was anobt-
ed for death, and took her tows for life, but she
continued to wear the white TciL I thonght it
singular that Mary Magdalene should at that time
take her hlaek vowit as they called them, because
as I learned in the community, she had not been
there a year; and her wearing the to^it« vet'/ after
taking them, appeared still more singular.

I mil endeavour to give some idea of tiie man-
ner in which she took her yows, and of the anoint-
ing. After she had retired to her conch,* the re-
ligieuses walked to the room in procession. Sister
St Clair had a wax taper blazing at her feet, and
Hie Superior knelt at her head with the vows,
which were copied on a half sheet of paper. The
Bishop then came in with both sacraments, all of
us prostrating as he passed. After putting the
tabernacle upon the little altar, which had been
placed there for the purpose, he read from a book
a great many prayers, all of us responding. He
asked her a number of questions about renooncing
the world, which she answered. The Superior
gave her the vows, and after pronouncmg them,
She was anointed ; sister Clfor laying bare her
neck and feet, which the Bishop crossed with holy

f X learned that the usual custom was to place \
a bllKik coi&n, covered with a black pall when they ven
to take the olodk vowb; but in this instance it wa

omitted.

SIX MONTHS IN A OONTBNT.

tom was to place them In
ack pall when they were
in tnlB instance it m

gj, it the same time repeating Latin. He then
I gave her the viatieumf and ended the ceremony as
be eommenoed, with saying mass, and passed out,
we all prostrating.

She lived rather longer than was expected, bnt
ber penanees were not remitted. She wonld fre-
Iqvently kneel and prostrate all night long in the
jeold infirmary, saying her rosary and other pen-
Imces, one or two of which I will mention. She
If ore next her heart a metallic plate, in imitation of
Iterown of thorns, from which I was given to nn-
UentaDd she suffered a sort of martyrdom. This
i often saw her Idss, and lay on the altar of tibe
neifis as she retied. AnoUier penance was, the
elining upon a mattress more like a table than a

M»

A day or two after this, the Superior, Motuer-

'stant, and Mary Benedict, ridicnled the appear-

of Mary Magdalene, because of the dropsy,

ihich prevented her appearing graceful, and be-

inse &e was disappointed in not going to heaven

loner. The Superior gave her some linen capes

I make, and said, ''Do you think you shall stay

^th us long enough to do these, sister V* She

okihem, and said, <* Tes, Mamere, I thank you ?"^

fetwiihstanding the Superior's severity, she some-

les appeared affectionate. One day I failed in

{img tiie observances at the usual time. I met

jerior, and fearing she would punish me, I

; into tears. She embraced me very affection-

*She wonld often ask permission to take a little watei^
I she was very thirsty ; the Superior always reftised It ;
^ itill the obeaient Magdalene replied, «Mamer^ I

ll"l. !

' ill

''Hi

nX MONTHS IN ▲ CONVENT.

ttely, and wiped my iaoe with a htudkerohief ma
■aid I Bbonld not h% pimished that time. ' Sh«
onee told me I might sit at meditation honr in
Btead of kneeling, aa it waa very tiresome. *She
frequently called me her holy innocent, because
ahe aaid I kept the nilea of the order, and was per- 1
aevering in my Tooation aa a reeluse. She said j
ahonld aee my friend Mrs. G. before long; bot I
did not aee her while I waa there.

While in the oonyent, I asked once or twice for
a Bible, bat never received any, and never saw one
while there. The Bishop often said that the laitr
were not qaalified to ezpoond the scriptnres, gndl
that the tueettion of the aposUea alone were n>|
thorized to interpret them, &o.

The Bishop, in one of his visits, spoke partieaJ
larly of the <uiolera. He told ns we must watebl
and pray more fervently or ** the old Scratch won
snatch na off with the cholera." It was recreatio
hour, bat Mary Magdalene waa at work in ^e
feetory. When she came to the commonity,
appeinped like a person in spasms $ she tried toL
'* Ave Maria," and immediately fainted. We we
all very mach alarmed. At that moment the
called aa to the choir for visitation and vesper
When I retired, I felt mach hart to see Uuy}k
dalene in the cold infirmary, bat did not dare
express my feelings. Next day, at reoreation,
Saperior, Mother-assistant, and Mrs. Mary Bene
diet, made a abort visit to Mary Magdalene, and (
retaming they told aa ahe was better, and io i
spiritaid sense well; for ahe had refused
her portion, or any thing eatable, as she i
wish to noarish her body, becaase the will of ^

GONTBKT.

SIX MONTHS IH A COMTBNT.

kifl bMO made known to her in a vision. We all
hid the promise of eonTersing with her, bnt we
v«n 10 constantly employed in oar varions offices,
tbit we bad no leisure.

The next dav, it being my torn to see that all
IthifMBelB which eontained holy water were filled,
I had an opportonity of looking at Maiy
^Jilene. Her eyes were partly open, and her
cewuparple; she lay pretty stilt I did not
into ipeak to her, supposing she wonld think it
I duty to tell of it, as it wonld be an infraction of
be roles. The next nif ht I lay thinking of her,
iben I wk :« snddenly. et?jrtled, hearing % rattling
oiN, as 1 1 iionght, ix* her throat Very soon sis-
Ifortha (the sick Ifij nun) arose, and coming to
said, ** Jesos I Mary 1 Jo'^eph ! receive her
ool!" and rang lihe bfU three* times. The
urit of the gentle Mag^n! tM had departed. The
[aperior oame, bringing a lighte ! wax taper, which
lie placed in Uie Loe^I of the decuised. She closed
^e eyes, and pkc«)d & cmcifix on the Vrefist Sis*
llartha had whispered ns to rise, and the Snpe-
r, obserring my a^tation, said, ** Be calm, and
with as in prayer: t fte is a happy sonl." I
elt aceordingly, repeating the litany, nntil the
ek itmek two, when we all assembled in the
Dir, in which was a fire and wax taper homing,
meditation, matins, lands, and prayers, and a
pyena (a particolar supplication,) that onr requests
';htk granted, we assembled for diet, and for
fint ume we had some toasted bread. We also

'The bell was struck three times to call the Superior,
14' e to call the Moihei^aaaistant. and once to ciul Mrs.
^•^"f Benedict.

!!iJ

iil

•IX KONTHS IN A CONVENT.

had reoreation granted in the time of silenoe. The i
Superior sent for ob, and instructed ns how to ap-
pear at the burial of onr sister Mary Magdalene
and aecompanied na to yiew her corpse. She was I
laid out in the habit of a professed nun, in a black
veil ; her hands were tied together, and her tows
placed in them. The Superior remarked that this
was done by the Bishop's request. At the eveniog
recreation the Bishop appeared in high spirits, and
rejoiced thjat so happy a soul had at last arrived io
heaven ; and commenced the << Diet illa,*^ on the
piano-forte, accompanied by the Toices of thel
others. He told me I should have Miss Miiyl
Magdalene for my intercessor, for she was to bel
canonized. The Mother Superior permitted me to
embrace the sisters, and gave me the Motherassis-I
tant for my Mother. She then presented ns withl
the relics of saints, that by their means we mightl
gain indulgences. She mentioned a ** retreat " u|
being necessary for our perseverance in a;
life.

The second day after this, the coffin was
in the choir, and the funeral services were
formed in the following manner : Dr. O'Flagbeirt
sang ti^e office, while tiie Bishop chanted it. h
ther Taylor officiated at the altar. Four or five i
the altar boys were present, and dressed in
robes, &e. ; two of them held wax tapers, a
holy water, a fourth a crucifix. Oneswangino
in tiie censor over the corpse, and another, at
same time, sprinkled holy water upon it Wei
formed onr part by saying the *' Dies illsB."
coffin* was then carried to the tomb by two '

• Hy feelingi were much hurt tiB^intneutnenuDw

■» >■

SIX MONTHS ni A OOMYBNT.

I USD. The Bishop, priests, and others followed,
nnging, snd oanying lighted tapers and a large

I eracifiz. The corpse was also followed by some
of the yonng ladies from the pablio schools,

{while the religieases remained in the convent.
After depositing tiie coffin in the tomb, the

I fllergy retired to dinner. We were permitted, at
recreation, to hear the clergy converse on varions
sabjeots. The Superior told ns that the customary

[libera and prayers for faithful souls departed might

Ibe omitted, as the Bishop said Magdalene's soul

[had gone immediately to heaven. The novices
lere permitted to relate visions of guardian angels.

At the next evening recreation, the Bishop again
ririted us, and appeared in very good spirits, play-
on his flute, and sung. He soon went away,
id the Superior said he only came to cheer up our
^irits.

Having onljr a few minutes to stay at confession,
had until this time kept the secret of my friend
Francis ; but the Bishop perceiving that I
rew discontented, endeavoured to comfort me, by
lying I was not hound to tJuit order; but he
led to know more particularly my reasons for
dng it, and began to threaten me with judg-
ments ; and observing my agitation, said he mwt
low what lay so heavily on my mind. He ask-
' me if it was any thing connected with the sick-
and death of Mary Magdalene. I told him,
' No, not that in particular; I do not like the Su-

bich the lid of the coffin was forced down to its place.
^e corpse had iwoUen much, and become too large for

"tcottu.

SIX MONTHS IM A CONVENT.

perior.** He said I miMt tell him instantly all fh«
wieked thonghte that had disturbed my mind and
asked me Tarioas improper qnestions, the meaninff
of whieh I did not then understand, and which I
decline mentioning. I was so confused, that I in.
advertently spoke Mary Francis's name» and bee-
ged his purdon for listening to her ; and he imme-
diately exolaimedy *' Ah ! I know all ; confess to
me what she told yon, and do not dare to deceive
me ; yon eannot deceive God." I told him neark
all fliat had passed between Mary Francis and my-
self. He said that Mary Francis was not a fit sub-
ject for any order, and they were obliged to send
her away ; that she was deranged, and I had done
vray wrong in listening to an insane person. He
said I oonld not go to the order she mentioned, and
that I wonld be more happy with the Sisters of
Charity, who were coming to reside there. He
said that worldlings hated me for the good put I
had chosen, and wonld ridicule me shonld I go
back to ihe world,, and then repeated some scrip-
tiue texts. I still persisted in saying it wu
my determination not to remain in that order,
and told him I disliked the Superior; and he
gave me » penance to perform. I was desirous it
ttiat time to have them think me obedient, or I
should not have condescended to such humiliation.
My motive was prudence^ not want of courage, for
by this time I had become disgusted with the lift
I led, and their manner of proceeding.

The next time the Bishop was with ns, he re-
quested me to sing any favourite tune I chose. I
sang the " Ode on Science," which every one
knows, is highly patriotio. At the close of thi

nx MONTHS IN A CONVBNT.

first stanzA, be spoke a few words in French to
the Saperior, who made a signal for me to stop ;
bnf not nnderstanding her I continned nntil she
had iiiade several signals, when I perceived she
was evidenllj displeased with my singing, and
{hen recalled* the words which I supposed were

One day the Superior asked me what it was that
lay 80 heavUy on my mind, as the Mother-assist-
ant had previously f onnd me in tears while at oar
examination of conscience. I excused myself by
leplying, I was thinking of my dear mother, (which,
1 ihongh true, was not the cause of my grief.) She then
kit me, but not without distrust, &e oyes of the
community being upon me. The next time we met
at recreation, one of them remarked, she hoped
iiheie was not another Judtis among them. I en-
IdeaTOured to betray no emotion, but they still mis-
Itrasted I had other views ; for, while sitting at my
[diet in the refectory, I observed my food was of a
that I had never seen before. It oonsisted of
rend balls of a darkish colour, about the size of
nutmeg, of a bitter astringent taste ; what tiiey
rerel never knew. I ate them as I ^d my other
liet, tnd strove to exhibit no fearful sensations.

A few days after the death of Mary Magdalene,
er trunk was brought forward, that the Superior
Digbt examine it, and distribute its contents to
liose she considered the most worthy. She gave
» each one some little relic, and to Miss Mary
[oaeph, sister to Magdalene, some letters which
lie had eomposed to be read, as the Superior said,
Iter her death. They were quite affecting, and

SIX MONTHS ni A CONTENT.

caused Mazy Joseph to weep much, for which thi
Superior reprimanded her.

Some day after this, the Superior sent forme to
practise musie, and then made a signal for me to
follow her into the Bishop's room. This room ig
separated from the others by shutters, withcnrtuns
drawing on the chapel side. When I had kissed
her feet, she desired to know why I cried at my
practice in the choir. I rather imprndently an*
swered, ** I eonld not tell ; I did not cxy mueb."
(It then stmck me, she conld not haye seen me as
I was alone,) I said I was very cold,* particnlarlv
my feet ; and I had been practising *« Blue-eyed
Mary," and was affected by the words. She said
that what I asserted was fidse, and commanded me
to tell her the tme cause, in a moment ; and poll.
ing the handkerchief from my hand, she hade ma
kneel and tell her at once, or I should be punished.
I was so frightened by the threats and manner of
the Superior, that I sobbed aloud, and blood gash-
ed from my nose and mouth. She then seized and
shook me by the arm, and seated me, saying,
'' Hush 1 be ctdm, or the young ladies may hear
you as they pass Uie door to go to their practice."
She asked me again and again to tell her why I
shed tears in the choir, and why I felt sach a re*
pugnance to communicate my thoughts. I replied,
becaase I had made a 'promise not to tell, and I
could not break it. The Superior tamed pale, but
suppressing her feelings, bade me break that pro-
mise direcSy, and asked to whom I had made it
I replied I could not tell anyone but my confessor.

* The rooms were seldom comfortably wanned, and it |
times I suffered mucn fh>m the cold.

*. '

SIX MONTHS IN ▲ CONTENT.

gays she, embracing me, " What t my dear sister,

not obey yovr Superior ?— tell me, my dear^ and I

will stand mpfmiihU for yon before the judgment-

leai To whom did yon make the promise f — to

Mary Magdalene or Mary Eraucis V* She also

asked me if I had related all the cansss of my dis-

content in confession. I replied, *< Not all," and

began to weep again. She endeayonred to console

me, saying, she conld not heal my wonnds unless

I opened my whole feelings to her ; and comparing

her words to tiiose of our divine Redeemer, took

me by the hand, and with seeming affection, told

me to nnfold all my feelings to her, as to an own

motlker ; and said she should think it her duty to

stay by me until I should relate the cause of my

grief, that she might pour into my heart a heavenly

ludm, fte. I told her I had not seen or heard from

my Mends, to whom I had written. She said that

was nothing to the point ; she was my friend ; and

asked me if I called persons who insulted the house

of Qod my Mends. I replied, <' No." She then

said one person had been there w^o called herself

my sister, and who threw pebbles at the convent

She also mentioned another person, who came with

my sister, and whom she said she would not take to

mp€ her feet on**^ After making this observa-

* I learnt flrom my sister, that whfle^t was in the con-
[?ent she and another young lady went there to invite me
to mv sister M's. wedding. She asked the portress if I
eonldbeseen at that hour, who replied die would see,
land asked her to walk in, inquired her nameL dso., went
lout, and soon returned with the answer that thesohol^
[wen not permitted to oome to the parlour that day. my
[lister told her it was important that she should see me.
^na she could not oome away without. The portress left

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

tion, she left me for » few moments to compose
myself. Retnming, she asked if I knew where I
was, and if I had conelnded to obey her, or break
my vows of obedience, and be severely punished.
I answered, ** No, Mamere, 1 will tell all I oan re-
member ;*' for I judged from her threats and looks
that I should be confined in a cellar, or have some-
thing more severe than asnal inflicted npon me*
the rales of the order also led me to think so. But
notwithstanding my fears of the Superior, I still
kept secret the real name of Miss Mary Francis,
and her promise of writing to Mrs. G. or my friends

the room, returned, dosed the shutters, retired, and pre.
lently the Superior entered, walking between two ser
vants, and made signs for my sister to approach, inquir-
ing her and the other lady's names, and their business
On being InformecL she mentioned that I could not be
seen, but she would deliver any message my sister de.
sired ; that the young ladies never violated the rules for
the sake of seeing company, and that I did not wish to
see any worldly mends, or have any communication with
them ; that my mind was wholly occupied with heavenlj
things; tliat t was perfectly happy, and "grmoing oi
fat €U butter;^' that I was fast improving in my stndiei^
learning mnuio, and drawing, (untrue.) In consequence
of my suter's weeping, and desiring her to name a time
when I could be seen, the Superior said she would go
and inquire whether I desired to see her. The Superior
soon returned, and told my sister that I did not wish to
see her, or any worldly relative ; but the Superior told
her that if I chose I could come to the wedding. Thej
both left the Convent with the impression that I vai a
public scholar, and could leave when I chose; and
thought it passing strange that I should revise to see
them, as I had, before going to the Convent, requested
them to visit me. My sister imagined that I had become
so infatuated with the Catholic religion as to lose all sis*
terly afllsction for those who were averse to it, and vest
away weeping.

SIX MONTHB m A CX>NTEMT.

respecting my sitiiation. SLe then dismissed me
for • while. But my thonghts soon whispered me
that onr **Oho8tltf Father" (as our Directory
tanght QB to call hun) had made the Superior ao«
qnalBted with what passed in secret confession, he-
eanse wi&ont such knowledse she never could
have used such threatening language, and never
eonld have heen displeased, as she was, at words
which I used in secret confession alone with the
Bishop. She asked me how I dared to converse
with Mazy Francis on the slate. Now, she never
could have known this, only from the Bishop. I
was never fully aware of their arts, in getting
secrets hy confession, until they became too visible
to be misunderstood. I then became more reserv-
ed, and the Superior remarked that I did not show
so much frankness or manner as formerly; the
reason of which the reader will understand to be,
that every eye was on me. A different course I
eonld not adopt, having lost confidence in my con-
fessor. I did not follow his advice, but resolved to
follow, as nearly as I could conscientiously, the ad-
vice of Mary Francis, being confident she was my
friend.

I felt a repagnance at the idea of returning to
[the world, supposing that many would beUeve me
a person romantic and visionary, and inexperienced
tin the ways of the world, and therefore unfit for
[loeiety. And I was also particularly averse to
ikug this step, because of the solemn promise of
Insion which I had taken. Nevertheless, I re-
ived to leave that convent, and to write Miss
iary Francis from my friend Mrs. G's., but was
idstermined whether I should return to the world.

SIX MONTHS IN A CONYBNT.

I had reason to think that my letters were never
sent to my friends, and determined to eonvey one
privately. I stole a few moments, and hastily
wrote some lines with my pencil, and hid them be-
hind the altar ; hnt the hiUet was discoyered, and
I never heard from it.

It was my torn that week to read as ** lectnress."
A hook was placed before me in the refectoir,
oalled ** Roles of St Angnstine/' and the place
marked to read was concerning a religiense receiv-
ing letters clandestinely. I could not control my
feelings, for what I read was very effecting. At
this lime we were directed to remain in the refec-
tory, instead of assembling in the commonitj, and
told to repeat '* Hail Mary " before a picture. The
Superior and Mother-assistant consented to har;
me practise mnsic no more daring the cold wea-
ther. They also permitted me to wear wanner
clothing.

One day, as I was sitting alone in the refectory
in the time of silence, the Snperior came in, and
after kneeling and extending her arms in the fonn
of a cross, she kissed the floor, and rising, walked
towards the door ; retnming she seated herself on
the bench beside me. I asked her if I sbonld
bring a chair ; she agywered, '* No," and inquired
how I felt, and whj^rchanged colour while at the
table. I replied that my month was very sore, and
it hurt me to read. She wished to know what
made my mouth sore. I told her I thonght it was
something I had eaten. She said, laughingUi, it
was the canker, and asked if it was not sent as a
judgment for some sin. I replied that I did not
know ; I bad not felt very well for some days, aofl

MX MONTHS IN A GONTBNT.

thought it was partly owing to want of exercise.
She then sent sister Martha to oondnct me into a
room at the farther part of the convent, for the first
time, ciuied a ** mangle room,'* There were some
sisters there kneeling in devotion, and one taming
i machine nsed for pressing clothes, instead of
ironing them, called a mangle. She presented me
with some altar laces, and told me to have them
prepared for tibe altar the next day at the ringing
of the bell. While there I was watched very nar-
rowly; but as I had gathered from the Snperior's
eonyersation, at different times, that the gates were
watched by ilie porters and dogs, which were of
great valne to the convent, I did not dare, then, to
make my escape, bat appeared as eheerf ol as pos-
sible. The sisters appeared very happy, it being a
day of recreation in the oommnnity, and the cele-
bration of some great saint. The Saperior, as she
passed her portrait, remarked, that she never look-
ed at it bat that it reminded her of smiling. She
appeared in onasaally good spirits, and gave xm
permission to wish each other happy feasts, not of
Inznry and feasting, in the common acceptation of
the terms, bat of prayers to the saints to free ns
from pargatory. In the coarse of the Saperior'f
conversation, she said she had read in the newspa-
pers of a new law which had been passed that no
person who was ander the age of twenty-eigM or
thirfy years shoald be allowed to keep any schooL
The Mother-assistant approved of tiiis law, and
laid it was good, as it womd remove tihe diificalty
which overseers had with yoang teachers who were
unfit to take charge of a school, particalarly tha
discipline.

SIX MONTHS IN A CONTENT.

I would here eonfeas my fault (if a fault it wu)
of not acknowledging all my obligations in secret
confession, and of pretending to think Mary Fran-
cis deranged ; and also of aoqaiescing in the So-
perior's commands in her presence with feigned
humility. I did this, that my design should not
be suspected.

A letter was read to the community, that was
addressed to the Superior, from Bishop P. of Em.
metsburgh. In it he rejoiced to learn that the
« community" was set free of that person who im
deranged, and whose disposition he had known to
his sorrow from her youth. He lamented the de*
parture of Magdalene, who no doubt was a saint
reigning in glory, after what she had beeu willing
to suff(Mr to gain Salvation.* I was sent for to at-
tend to the Superior in the Bishop's room,
mass. She was folding his cassoo and robe.
I entered, she bade me do as my directory tanght,
and said I had let trifles make an impression upon
me, and weak minds only allowed trifles to afifect
them. Giving Jie the letter, she bade me tell her
what I thought of it I read it, and said, I could
not believe what Mary Francis had told me, if she
were deranged, but yet I had rather go to the con-
vent where she was educated than stay at that oo
Mount Benedict She asked me if I thought of
going without protection. I begged of her to let
me see some of my friends there, or permit me to
return to the world. After saying she had sent

* Since leaving the convent, I have written to Mil
Maiy Francis for information in regard to this letter, but
have received no satisfactory answer. I liave, howeni^
received item her three sisters.

SIX MONTBl IN A CONVENT.

my letten* to my friendt, who, if thej wislied,
could oome there and see me, ehe told me not to
tronble m vsell, for the Bishop wonld soon be there,
and I oonld talk with him about it|

One Sabbath after mass, while we were in the
ohoir repeating the examination of eonsoienoe or
monthly review, I was oalled in a whisper into the
oommnnity with the rest of the sisters, but pre-
tended not to hear. The others went in while I
remained. I heard the Bishop speak to them as
they went in ; bnt I had absented myself from
confession and communion that day, and did not
wish to see the Bishop on account of his previous
hmguage. After the doors had been opened sev-
erai^imes, one of the religieuses (sister Martha) |
camv in and knelt with me. The bell then rang,
and I went into the refectory, waiting as usual for
the Mother-assistant's instructions in the Latin
office. Sister Martha soon entered, and asked me
if I knew where the Mother-assistant was, and
whether I had been in the conununity since mass.

* My friends never received any letter from me.

1 1 cannot remember all that passed in confession, for
I was at this time much oonAised ; however, the Bishop
a£ked me how I should like to go to a convent In Canada,
which I objected to.

1 1 will not presume to say much about sister Martha,
as I never conversed with her, and therefore was not so
able to Judge of her sulflBilngs, ^. She was a professed
lav religieuse, and I believe an American. She was call-
ed the portress, and one of those, I learned, who chose
rather to be a door-keeper than to dwell among the
wicked. She, together with three of the choir religieuse,
lodged in the infirmary with me. While she slept there,
she, as did Magdalene, coughed at Intervals during the
night. Sister Martha often approached the Superior
kneeling and weeping.

¥'i

BIX MONTHS IN A CONTENT.

I replied, No, bat wm waitinff for the Mother*
ftesietant After saying office, I went down to the
refectory to string some rosary beads, and after-
wards returned to the choir, where the noYicei
were telling their beads. The Superior came into
Join in devotion, and remained nntil diet As we
were proceeding to diet, I accidentally teuehed the
Snpenor ; she looked at me, and appeared much
displeased. At recreation the religieuses were very
deslrons to learn the state of my mind. I stroye
to appear unembarrassed, and answered their qnes-
tions with seeming ignorance. I was not censured
lor my transgression of the roles, nor was any re<
mark made upon it

In the eyenin^ we were permitted to sit in the
eommnnity, which had been warmed. After re*
peating the offices, and during the time of dlenee,
a dog barked in front of the community, and we
heail a noise like some one thumping upon the
doors. The religieuses fell down before the altar
and appeared much frightened. I kept my seat,
bnt at that moment heard the window raised, and
the Superior ask who was there. No answer wy
made to her inquiry. I then felt somewhat alarm-
ed, bnt endeavoured to betray as little fear as pes*
tible. What this noise was, or for what reason it
was made, I never could learn, bnt I have supposed
it was done to see if I was easily alarmed. The
like had several times occurred.

About this time the martyrologies of some saints
were read at table ; also the history of saints who
had been tompted by Satan. Perhaps it may be
well to relate one or two. A certain saint, who
was strongly tompted bv Satan, retired to a deiertt

0IX MONTHS IM A CONVENT.

ind eonllned himsell to a eell learoely large enough
for him to lie at ease. He retired here for pioua
porposeB. After mortifjing hii body for a long
lime, he prayed for raiu that he might quench his
thirsty whioh was granted: for a hird came and
brought him food, which renewed his strength,
ind he returned to his monastery and was ne?er
more troubled with the temptations of Satan.

Some noblemen ones invited a poor wandering
monk, who was begging for the monastery, to dine
with them on Friday. They helped him to meat ;
he made the sign of the cross, refusing to eat it.
They aeked the reason ; and drawing their swords,
threatened his life unless he did eat it. He told
them if they would allow him a few minutes that he
might pray, and give him a pewter plate to cover
the meat, he would eat it. After praying a few
minutes tiiat the meat might become fish, he took
off the plate, and behold it was fish ; and he then
Bat down and ate, and they believed him an in-
I ipired man.

Many aoeounts of those who had beeomo sainte
[were so disagreeable and even revolting, that I will
I not attempt to relate or describe them.

As several of my friends desire to learn some-
llhing coDcendng the scholars, I will relate what
|littie I know. I never had permission to enter any
Df the rooms in the recluse apartmente, except
'hose before named, and never to the publio apart-
lents, except on examination days, when the Sa-
erior and Bishop were present During one va-
ation, the proung ladies who remained were per-
ntted to visit the eommnni^ to give iha members

II '• ,

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

presents.* I never spoke to them but to thank
them for a present. Thej were sometimes at ya-
cation permitted to enter the community and em-
brace the religienses.

Complaints were often brought to the Superior
while at recreation, and sometimes repeated aloud.
They were generally violations of the rule$^ which
were very strict They were sometimes punished
for refusing to say prayers to the saints, which
they said their parents disapproved of : also for
refosing to read Boman Catholic history. A Miss
T., of C., was brought to the Superior, and repri-
manded for writing her discontents to her friends.
The Superior destroying one half the letter, and
gave me the blank leaf to write a prayer on. An-
other was reprimanded severely because she had
said to the other young misses, she should be gUd
when the time came for her to leave the convent,
&e. The Superior, shaking her severely, ohUgi
her to kneel and perform an act of contrition by
kissing the floor, and saying that she was yeiy
sorry that she had offended her teachers, and beg-
ged the forgiveness of all.

Some of the young ladies were apparently great
favourites of the Superior and Bishop. They
sometimes sent for them to bestow presents aad
caress them. One young lady, of whom the Bishop
was guardian, was treated very ill. I often saw her
in tears, and once heard the teacher tell the Sope*
riior that it waa because she had no dress suitable
to wear when she went into the world to see her

* Although we received presents, we were not allowed
to keep them.

A CONVENT.

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

lentai, we were not allowtd

Mends, Sha was designed, as I learned, to be a
tflioher in a convent in Canada.

A number of the yonng ladies were nnhappj,
whose names I have forgotten. I learned that
they disliked the discipline.

After this, the Superior was sick of the influenza,
I ind I did not see her for two or three days. I at-
I tended to my offices as nsnal, snch as preparing
the wine and the water, the chalice, host, holj wa-
ter, and vestments, Sso. One day, however, I had
forgotten to attend to this duty at the appointed
honr, bnt recollecting it, and fearing lest I should
oiSeaid the Superior by reason of negligence, I ask-
ed permission to leave the room, telling a novice
fliat our Mother had given me permission to attend
to it; she answered, **0 yes, sister, yon can go
then.** I went immediately to the chapel, and was
amnging things for mass, which was to take place
[the next day. Whilcp busily employed, I heard the
idjoining door open, and the Bishop's voice dis*
jtinetly. Being conscions that I was there at the
[wrong hour, I kept as still as possible, lest I should
the discovered. . While in this room, I overheard
[the following conversation between the Bishop and
[Saperior:— The Bishop, after taking 8nu£f in his
[maal manner, began by saying—" Well, well, whaf
loes Agnes say ? how does she appear?" I heard
iUHnetly from the Superior in reply, that ** Ac*
Bording to all appearances, she is either possessed
Bf ifueruihility or great self-command." The
Bishop walked about the room, seeming much dis-
pleased with the Superior, and cast many severe
ind improper reflections upon Mary Francis, who,
it was known, had influenced me; all which his

BIX MONTHS IN A OONVBNT.

lordship will well remember, He then told the
Superior that the establiBhment was in its infancy
and that it would not do to have such reports so
abroad as these persons would carry ; that Agnes
must be taken care of ; that they had better send
her to Canada, and that a carriage could cross tbe^
line in two or three days. He added, by way oil
repetition, that it wonld not do for the Protestants
to get hold of those things and make another
** fnss.** He then gave the Superior instrQctions
how to entice me into the carriage, and they soon
both left the room, and I heard no more.

The reader may judge of my feelings at this mo-
ment : a young and inexperienced female, shut
out from the world, and entirely beyond the reach
of friends : threatened with speedy transportation
to another country, and inyoluntary confinement
for life, with no power to resist the immediate fnl-
filment of the sturtling conspiracy I bad overheard.
It was with much difficulty that I controlled mj
feelings ; but aware of the importance of not be-
traying any knowledge of what had taken place, I
succeeded in returning to the refectory nnsnspect-
ed. I now became firmly impressed, that unless I
could contrive to break away from the convent
soon, it would be for ever too late ; and that eveiy
day I remained rendered my escape more difficoli

The next day I went to auricular confession, not
without trembling and fear lest I should betnj
myself; but having committed my case to God, I
went somewhat relieved in my feelings. Ati

grevious confession I had refused to go to Canadi;
nt at this time, in reply to the Bishop's inqniiy, I
answered that I would consider the snbJMt ; ' '

SIX MONTHS IN A CONTENT.

Ihonght it wrong to evinoe any wmt of fortitude,
especially when I had so much need of it. I did
i not alter my course of condnct, fearing that if I
appeared perfectly contented, I ahonld be saspect-
ed of an intention to escape.

It was my tarn daring that week to officiate in
I fhe offices. While reading I felt something rise
I in my throat, which two or three times I tried to
I swallow, bat it still remained. I felt alarmed, it
[being what I had never before experienced.* At
'recreation I was asked what ailed me, and replied
that I coald not tell ; bat I described my feelings,
land was told I was vapoarish.

They were very desirous that week to know if
I my feelings were changed. I said they were, and
endeavoared to make it appear to them that Satan
had left me ; bat in reality I feared I shonld never
escape from them, though I had determined to do
I so the first opportunity.

I was in the habit of talking in my sleep, and
[had oftit awoke and found the religienses kneel-
liog aroond my couch, and was told ttiat they were
[praying for me. Fearing lest I should let fall
some word or words which would betray me, I tied
|a handkerchief around my face, determining, if ob-
lerred, to give the appearance of having the tooth-
she, and so avoid detection. For some days I was
lot well, and my mind, as may be naturally sup-
posed, sympathized with my body, and many
things occurred that were to me unpleasant, which
' shpll ^ass unnoticed.
Bat what I have now to relate is of importance.

• I have since named the circumstaiicea to a phyelcian.
vuo says it was /ear aloua.

SIX MONTHS IN ▲ CONVENT.

A few days after, while at my needle in the refeo*
tory, I heard a carriage drive to the door of the
convent, and heard a person step into the Sope*
rior's room. Immediately the Superior passed
lightly along the passage which led to the back I
entry, where the menservants or porters were em-
ployed, and reprimanded them in a lond tone for
somiething they were doing. She then opened the
door of the refectory, and seemed indifferent aboat
entering, bnt at length seated herself beside me,
and began conversation, by saying, "Well, my dear
girl,what do yon think of going to see your friends?"
I said, '* What ifriends, Mamere ?" Said she, '< yon
would like to see yonr friends Mrs. G-. and Father I
B., and talk with them respecting your call to an- j
other order." Before I had time to answer, she
commenced taking off my garb, telling me she was |
in haste, and that a carriage was in waiting to eon- i
vey me to my friends. I answered, with as chc
fnl a countenance as I could assume, "0, Mam(
I am sorry to give you so much trouble; I hadj
rather see them here first." While we were con-j
versing, I heard a little bell ring several times.
The Superior said, << Well, my dear, make npyooij
mind; the bell calls me to the parlour.'' Slii|
soon returned, and asked if I had made op my |
mind to go. I answered, **No, Mamere/' S
then said I had failed in obedience to her, and u \
I had so often talked of going to another order with i
such a person as Mary Francis, I had better go j
immediately; ond again she said, raising k
voice, ** Yon have failed in respect to yonr Sop^
rior; you must recollect that I am a ladjofj
quality, brought up in opulence, and accastondi

BIX MONTHS IN A GONYENT.

io all the Inxnries of life." I told her that I was
yery sorry to have listened to any thing wrong
[igaiDst her dignity. She commanded me to kneel,
Iwhioh I did ; and if ever tears were a relief to me,
libey were then. She stamped npon the floor vio-
lentlyi and asked, if I was innocent why I did not
ffo to the commanion. I told her I felt unworthy
|to go to the commnnion at that time.* The hell
igain rang, and she left the room, and in a few
moments retaming, desired me to tell her immedi-
itely what I thought of doing, for as she had pro-
mised to protect me for ever, she mast know my
lind. She then mentioned that the carriage was
^till in waiting. I still declined going, for I was
(onyinoed their object was not to cany me to Mrs.
\. and priest B., to consult about another order,
but directly to Canada. I told her I had condu-
|od to ask my confessor's advice, and meditate on
some time longer. She rather emphatically
ud, ** Ton can mediate on it if you please, and do
I yon like about going to see your friends.'' She
lid that my sister had been there, and did not
^h to see me. Our conversation was here inter-
ipted by the entrance of a novice. The Superior
ken gave me my choice, either to remain ot.
tonnt Benedict, or go to some other order, and
the next week to make up my mind, as it re-
ined with me to decide. She then gave me a

I* My eyes were opened : I found myself in an error,
a bad been too enthusiastic in my first views of a con-
ttt life. I was discontented with my situation, and
I lulng some deception towards the Superior and the
mmi in order to efiiect an escape ; therefore I did
"^ feel worthy to attend communion.

SIX MONTHS IN A GONT£NT.

lb'- '-

(V ^

heavy penanee to perform, which was, instead of

goisg to the ehoir as nanaly at the ringing of the
ell, to go to the mangle room and repeat "Ave
Marias ** while turning the mangle. While per-
forming my penance, sister Martha left the room'
and soon returning, said she had orders to release
me from m^ penance, and to direct me to finish
my meditation on the picture of a saint, which she
gave me. Bnt instead of saying the prayers that I
was hidden, I fervently prayed to be deliyered from
their wieked hands.

They appeared mneh pleased with my snpposed
leformation, and I think they believed me sincere.
The superior, as a tost of my humility, kept me read-
ing ; that is, made no signal for me to stop, until the
diet was over, when a plate of apple parings, the
remnant of her dessert, was brought from the Sa-
perior*s table, and the signal given for me to laj
down my book and eat them.* I ate a few of them
onlyt hoping they might think my abstaining from
the remainder self-denial in me, and not suspect
me of discontent or disobedience. I performed
all my penanees with apparent cheerfulness.

The Bishop yisited the convent on the next holy
day, and on tiieir remarking that he had been iIh
sent some time, he made many excnses, one of
which was, he had been engaged in collect
money to estoblish the order of the *' Sisters of
Charity *' where the *' Community ** once lived ;
and he spoke of the happiness of the life of a" Re-
ligieuse " of this order. After he played on the
piano, *'Away with Melancholy,** the Snperior

* This was the second time I had been presented witk
apple parings by the Superior.

A CONVENT.

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

isked me to play, and fhe Bishop said, ** By all
means." I complied, bnt my voice faltered throngh
fear, when Miss Mary Benedict apologized for me,
by laying I had not practised much lately, on ao-
eonnt of the Mother- assistant's engagements, and
ihe yonng ladies occupying all the instruments.
She showed the Bishop a robe which I had been
busy in working for him. He said I must not o^
toy acconnt neglect my mnsic. After telling one
of his stories about a monk, who had disobeyed
the mles of his order until Satan took possession
of him, he left us, saying he hoped ** Old Scratch *'
would not tdce possession of our hearts as he did
fhat monk's, and hoped that we should never have
mother Judas in the community.

Some days after the conversation which I heard
between the Bishop and the Superior while behind
the dtar, I was in the refectory, at my work, and
; heard flie noise of the porters, who were employed
I Mwing wood, and I conjectured the gate might be
I open for them. I thought it a good opportunity to
! escape, which I contemplated doing ia this man-
ner, viz. to ask permission to leave the room, and
[18 1 passed the entry, to secrete about my habit a
tbood which hnng there, that would help to conceal
[part of my garb from particular observation ; then
[to feign an errand to the infinnarian from the Sn-
Brior, as I imagined I could escape by the door of
le infirmary. This plan formed, and just as I
ras going, I heard a baud of music playing, as it
Beemed, in front of the convent. I heard the
ponng ladies assembling in the parlour, and the
porters left their work, as I supposed, for the saw-
)g ceased. I felt quite revived, and felt more

nZ MONTHS IM A OONVBNT.

•onfldent I should be able to escape witliont detec-
tion, eTcn should it be neoessaiy to get over the
fence. I feigned an errand and asked permission
of Miss Mary Austin to leave the room,* which
she granted. I succeeded in secreting the hood,
and the book in which Miss Mary Francis had left
her address, and then knocked three times at the
door which led to the lay apartments. A person
eame to the door, who appeared in great distress.!
I asked her where sister Bennet and Sister Ber-
nard were ; she left me te find them. I gave the
infirmarian to understand that the Superior wished
to see her, and I desired her to go immediately to
her room. These gone^ I unlocked and passed out
by the back door, and as the gate appeared shut, I
climbed upon the $laU which confined the grape
Tines to the fence ; but they gave way, and falling
to the ground, I sprained my wrist. I then thought
I would try the gate, which I found unfastened,
and as there was no one near it, I ran through, and
hurried to the nearest house. In getting over the

* Sister Martha (the sick religieuse) was scouring the
floor at this time, which I saw was quite too hard for
her. Not long after I left, I inquired after her, and
learned she was no more.

t This was Sarah S. (a domestic,) who appeared very
unhappy while I was In the convent. I often saw her in
tears, and learned flrom the Superior that she was sighing
for the veil. When I saw my brother, I informed him of
this circumstance, and he soou /ound who she was, and
ascertained that some ladies in Cambridge bad been to
see the Superior, who used to them pretty much thesama
language die d<d to my sister. I have since seen her.
She is stUl under the influence of the Boman Church,
but assures me that she did not refuse to see the ladies,
as the Superior had represented to them, and »be wept
because of ill health, £c

one answe

SIX MONTHS IN A OONTBNT.

fences between the eonvent and this honse, I fell
and hart myself badly. On reaching the hoaie, I
fell exhausted npon tiie door step ; bnt rising as
loon as possible, I opened the door, and was allow-
ed to enter. I inqmred if Catholios lived there ;
one answered '* No." For some time I ooald an-
swer none of their questions, being so mnoh ex-
hausted.

As soon as they understood that I requested pro-
tection, they afforded me every assistance in their
power. I had been only a few moments there,
when I heard the alarm bell ringing at the convent.
On looking out at the window, we saw two of the
porters searching in the canal witb long poles.
ilfter searching some time, they returned to the
convent, and I saw their dogs scenting my course.

While at that house, I looked in a glass, and was
inrprised, nay, frightened, at my own figure, it was
iopale and emaciated.*

Notwithstanding my wrist being sprained, I
wrote a few lines to Mrs. G., whom I still supposed
my fiiend, begging her to come to my relief, for I
did not wish my father and sisters to see me in my
present condition. I thanked God that he had in-
clined his ear unto me, and delivered me out of
the hands of the wicked. But here was not an
end of my afflictions. Mrs. G. came in the evening
to convey me to her house. She would not allow
me to say any thing about my escape at Mr. K's.,
and wished me to return to the convent that night*
I resolved not to go. After whispering a long
time to me about the importance of secrecy^ sh e

* It will be perceived that this does not correspond
with what the Superior told my sister.

■ ,i

BIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

left Mr. K'Sm m we supposed, for home ; bat ilie
soon retnmed, saying she at first intended to leave
me at Mr. K*s., hot had conolnded to take me
home with her, as she desired some further con-
versation. Her manners appeared very strange,
yet I did not distrast her friendship. Before
leaving Mr. K's, she requested me to obtain for
them a promise not to say any thing about my ei*
eape, which I did.

After I arrived at Mrs. G's., I showed her my
wounds, and my feet, which had been frozen, and
told her I did not fiud the convent what I had ex-
pected. She seemed to sympathize with me, and
to do all in her power for my recovery. She did
not then urge me to say much, as I was qnite weak.

The next morning the convent boy on horse-
back oame galloping up to the house, and delivered
to Mrs. G. a letter from the Superior, and was
very particular, as he said he had ordors not to
give it to any one except to her. She refosed to
teU me its contents, and sent directly for a chaise
to go to the convent. She took with her the re-
ligious garb I had worn on my head, and the book
containing Miss Mary Francis* name.* Mean-
while I endeavoured to compose myself, and wrote
to Miss Mary Francis, agreeable to my promise,
informing her of my afflictions, and of my relnc-
tance to return to the bustle of the world. I pro-
posed to her some questions, and requested her ad-
vice. I wrote that I could not think otherwise than

• Ihis book I brought away, hecause Mary Francis had
pricked here and her father's real name out in it, and I
wished to refer to it, in order to write her. I took 11
from my writing desk and slipped it into my pocket

SIX MONTHS IN A CONYEMT.

that the Superior and Bishop were very wicked. I
did not write muob, thinking her oonfessor might
idrise her not to answer it, as it was probable that
the Superior would write to him ; and I was anz*
iousto convince Mrs. G. that Mary Francis thought
18 1 did, for Mrs. G. would not permit me to say
one word against the Superior or Bishop ; and I
was resolved to ascertain if Mary Francis was liy-
ing and happy. When Mrs. G. returned from the
convent, she said the Superior had too exalted an
opinion of * to think I would say any thing
against the institution, and she had sent me a pre'
tentf as she still considered me one of her flock ;
and if I had gone astray, she should do every thing
she ooald for me, in a temporal as well as in a
spiritnal sense, if I would repent. My words were
JQBt these :**I cannot receive any present from the
Saperior ; she is a wicked woman, and I do not
beUeve her friendship pure." At this moment
Priest B. drove to the door, and desired to see me.
I did not think myself in danger, and eonversed
with him ; but I soon fonnd that he had seen the
Superior and Bishop. He said, that as he was my
sponsor, he considered' it his duty to advise me,
and hoped I was not going to break my vows to
God, and expose myself to the world; because, H
I did, I should be ridiculed and laughed at. He
said he had before conveyed a novice to the ** Sis-
ters of Charity," and would convey me to them, or
to some other retired place which I might choose,
^and that he was deeply concerned for my welfare.
J told him I could not think of going any where
then, as my health would not allow any exposure
|to the cold, and that Mrs. G. thought it best I

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8IZ MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

ihonld remain wiih her antil I waa better, when I
•hoald Tiait my father. He then exclaimed, " what
letter ia thia f *' taking np and reading the one I
had written to Mary Franeia. After reading it,
he appeared anrpriaed, and deaired to know how I
oame in poaaeaaion of her name. He said he shonld
have Been me at the eonvent had he known I was
diacontented ; and that if the Superior bad done
wrong, it waa no reaaon I ahonld do so, by speak-
ing againat the convent or those connected with it
He then ahook handa with me, and said he would
oonverse with me again when I waa more composed,
and left the house.

I soon began to suspect, by Mrs. 6's. manner,
that ahe was not my friend, and that if she had an
opportunity she would deliver me into the hands of
the CathoHcs ; for I learned from her little daugh-
ter, that her mother had given her to the Catholie
church, because the Superior had offered to edo-
cake her free of expense, and that her mother was
acquainted with the Superior before I went to the
convent Now, thia I did not know before, and
I began to be more guarded, and to fear that all be-
longing to the Romiah church were alike.
i gave Mrs. G. the letter to send to the post-
She asked if I waa afraid ahe would break it
and at another time afterwarda, she told me I was
afraid she would poison me, because I refused to
take medicine, which I thought I did not need.
Such thoughts did not occur to my mind.

In a dayoriwo. Priest B. again came, and after
mueh peitna^on from Mra. G., I consented to sie
him. At firat he appeared very pleasant, said hi
bad come to render me aasistance, and begged m

SIX MONTHS IN A CONTENT.

as I valaed my rdigion and xeputafeiDn, to take his
advice. I toldhimtlubt I wished noneof hisassistanoe
or adTice ; that I shonld go to mj brother's, at East
Cambridge, as soon as possible ; that as respeeted
my religion, I did not belieye in one which fnstifi-
ed its followers in doing wrong ; and that I was
not at idl apprehensive that my reputation would be
injured on that aeconnt by retnming to the world.
He affected considerable contempt for my aged pa-
rent, and ridiculed many things which he said he
bad heard of my father, and he said,^ <* Is it pos-
sible that a yonng lady wishes to have her name
made pnblic T" I answered, ** Yon yery well know
I should sludnk from snch a thing, bnt I should
rather return to the world and expose myself to its
seem, than remain subject to the commands of a
fyranf '* Then,*' said he, *' if you are determin-
ed to return to the world, you may go to ruin there
for all I can do ; and rely upon it, you will shed
tears of blood in consequence of the step you h|»re
taken, if you do not repent and confess ul al the
secret tribunal of Qod.'' I told him I should con-
fess to none but God, and that my conscience
prompted me to do as I had done. He asked me
if I would go with him to the Superior, as she
wanted to see me. I replied, " No, I will not, for
I believe you or any other Catholio would (if di-
rected) Uke my life, were it in your power, as truly
as I believe I am living, and I will not trust my-
self in your dutches again." At these words he
tnmed pale, and asked me what I had seen or heard
at the convent that made me think so. I refused

* He informed me I ahoold be anathematiaed pabUdj.
UI did not repent r -#i

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

to say more, and retired at his exolamation that it
wotdd be death to me. Mrs. Q. endeavonied to
console me with the assurance that he meant right
and that it would, they Reared, be death to my boq]!

Mrs. G. afterwards accused me of endeavoiumg
at the time of my escape, to induce sister Benard
to leaye the eonvent. llie Superior sent me some
articles of wearing apparel, which for a time I was
obliged to accept. My sister called ; she had been
at Sie convent, and was informed that I was at
Mrs. 0's. She was overjoyed to see me, but madi
grieved because (as she thought) I had refused to
see her at the convent. I endeavoured to ealm
her, and {nromised to explain all another time, as-
suring her my affection was not diminished and that
I should soon visit her. I did not then explain to
her the manner of my leaving the convent. It be-
ing late in the evening, she soon returned home,
The Misses K. also cidled, and by tiieir conTeisa-
tion I feared they would inform my father of my
situation before I should be well and prepared to
see him ; and I did not wish to grieve him with a
Imowledge of what had taken place. Mm. G. said
i^e expected my father would rave at her for
having advised me as she had done, if he ihonid
find me at her house.

A Catholio ladj, who had stood my sponsor, and
who brought a letter from Mary Francis,* called,
and conveyed me to her house in Gharlestown,
where my father and brother soon found me, and
desired I would return to my fkiends, which I did
in the evening. Before leaving, however, I ealled
on Priest B., and told him that I could neverthink
1^5 Tills letter had been broken open.

SIX MONTHS IN A OONYENT.

of again attending the Bomish Chnioh, giving my
niionii and adding that I had heen deceiyed in
their religion, and m ihoae who helieved it } that
I wiahed to take my leaye of him, with the hope
that he would not think I indulged any wrong
feelingi towards them, or that I desired to injure
the Bomish Ghureh, hut sineerely hoped tiiey
would reform. I told him this while he sat in the
eonfeasionaL He remained nnmoyed, and would
not allow that I had heen treated ill. He said that
I eould not hut Imow that the step I had taken
would be a great injury to the oonvent. I assured
him that it was not to he charged to me, hut to the
Superior and Bishop, who hy their conduct had
eompelled me to take that step. I also told him
that I believed it had heen his intention to deliver
I me again into their hands, but I had broken the
ehains which bound me, and felt free ; and that I
should always be thankful that I had delivered my-
[seU from tiie bondage of what I should consider to
a Romith yoltn, rather than the true cross of

After I had returned to my brother's, Mrs. 0.

mt to me by her little daughter some money,

vhieh ahe said I had given tO the Superior. Five

oUars of this sum, and some wearing apparel, I

msidered as not my own, and sent them hack with

I note to Madam St Gkorge, stating that I declined

Wfing any thing fh>m them as presMtt, hut if

^ey would return what wearing apparel, &c.

timged to me, it would be properly acknowUndgedt

I And now I have endeavoured, to the exwt of

f ability, to give a true and faithful aceonnt loi

bat fell under my observation during my iojamn

SUPPLEMENT TO

among fhe Catholies, tnd espeoially during my
leddenoe at the monastery on Mount Benedid
And I leare it with the reader to judge of my mo-
fives for beeoming a member of the Ursuline Com-
mnnity, and for renonncing it

If in eonseqaence of my having for a time itny-
ed from the true reUgUm^ I am enabled to become
an humble instmment in the hands of God in
warning others of the errors of Romanism, and
preventing even one from falling into its trnm^
and from being shrouded in its delnsions, I shall
feel richly rewarded.

SUPPLEMENT

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

OOi

SuOB is the interestbg and affecting narratlTe of
Miss Reed, and, affltiming its truth, ezceptiog
those few parts of it which she acknowledges ia
her notes to have been hastily and inaccnntdjn-
eorded, it must be considered, in its cUus, u one
of the most powerful appeals to the Ftoteetutj
world against the absurdities and blasphemiei of I
Popery that ever appeared in print It has been
generally objected m America, and will no doalil
be so in England ; that the artifice whieh the
writer in her noviciate frequently practised, aceoi^ J

SIX MONTHS IN A CONVENT.

ingto her own eonfession, on her Snpeiior, the
Bishop, and oilien, especially as her snffexings in-
exeased and her doohts of the good of the system
moltiplied, argaes against the credit due to the
iumrati?e. That reader, however, must have little
lympaUiy with • yonng sufferer, conscions of
having heen hetrayed into a ednrsa of suffering by
ihose, who pretended to be her best friends, and
who even assnmed to be the agents of heaven for
her good ; who can hastily impeach her general
Teracity npon this slight ground, and suppose that
because tibe persecuted chfld now and then attempt-
ed to relieve her pains by misrepresentation, Uie
free and independent woman can deliberately ma-
tore snch incipient deceit into a volume of falsehood.
Bat more of this hereafter. Whether the book
[now pat into the hands of English readers is one
leqaued by the state of the times— is one rendered
necessary by any increase in the monastic system
[and spirit-^forms a question of much greater im-
}rtance. Convents once were seats of superior
ling, if not scenes of superior devotion : ja^
leremaybe individuals within their walls now,
rho caltivate the heart as well as mind with more
idastiy and to better effect than could have been
Kpected in any other mode of life. This argu-
lent, however, has lost its force in the altered
Dndition of society, especially in England and
jnerica. The freedom of the press, and the un-
Bttered state of literature at large, forbid the
bought that from the cells of a monastery any
fort of mind can proceed that shall rival or ap-
roaehthe production of modem letters. Then,
ith regard to religion— who does not fereiBiTe

1 3

SUPPLEMKNT TO

thtt the present tge differs m widely from the m
of prosperous convents as any two periods of hu-
toiy on this subject can do. We are apt to forget
that divine Providence materially diversifiei the
direction and operation of religioas principle at
different periods. At one time the passive and at
another the active graces of the Christian are
called forth. At one season private ezerciseg of
godliness, and^at another its public effects are ex*
cited and required. Winter leads the sap down to
the roots, while Summer calls it up into the
branches, and displays it in the blossoms and the
fruit ; and it is now Summer in the religioiu and
the literary world, at all events in the two distin*
guished nations of the earth in which this book ii
making its wonderful way.

Admitting, as we perhaps must admit, that the
more private and retired influence of religion io
convents of their best days was superior to the de*
Totion of the generality of modem Christiang, we
still avow with confidence, that modem ChristiBni
mel in public spirit and active zeal and charity.
u it be said that these are qualities put forUi ij
the Catholic advocates of convents, as well as tlie
Protestant opponents of them, we answer thit
while the zeal and charity of the former are ezelo'
sive even to bitterness, ttiese qualities in the kt*
ter are as expansive as tiie wants of mankind, n
diffusive as the limits of the inhabited worli
When the river spreads wide, or flows in mm
fertilizing currents, it cannot be expected to nU
so deep. Among even Protestants of a ceotioj j
and half ago, and farther back, we discover a itrou
propensity to exclusion, almost to the degieea

SIX MONTHS IN ▲ OONTBNT.

the Caiholio world; and if the Catholiof had anj
of the glory of trae deTotion shining around them,
it became excelled hy the greater glory which en-
eiieled the headi of the reolnse Pnritans. At the
same time, how little do we find even in them of
the aotiTe and wide spreading henevolence exem-
plified by the hett men of modem times I Their
own fonls— flieir own families^their own partica-
lir ohnrches— these drew forth their concern,
while it too much narrowed and restricted it Bat
the present day eidiibits a remarkably altered
8eene; and firom a thousand pnblie assemblies,
eonyened for the Tery purpose, and eyincing their
I lineerity and fervency by their sacrifices and efforts,
we hear the exclamation—** Let the whole earth
[be filled with his glory/'

These reflections are perfectly in accordance

[with flie object which Miss Beed, strives, by the

)Dable publication of her striking little work,

aeeomplish. Did the Catholics of America and

Sogland, to say nothing of those of other countries,

in completely with this altered state of society,

id Btrive by open and public efforts alone to dif-

tbeir system and multiply their proselytes, all

Id be well. Bat in addition to such etTorts

bey trc ahning to perpetuate, or rather to ravive,

M very worst parts of a system which they are

strained to acknowledge has for ages, if not

itories, been declining in public favour. In ad-

kion to public efforts, as zealous as any that are

le by Protestants, though much more Sectarian,

ij are privately endeavouring to fill the convents

|ih inmates, after striving wiSi too much success

multiply the number of thojse worse than doubt*.

Tf'*'

•UPPLKMBNT TO

ful institotibnf. All the priests of America and
EngUnd eonld not have effected one quarter of the
adyanttga which the Papal mtem has reoeutlj
gained in these countries, had it not been for this
simaltaneons moyement of priyate and public zeal.
A recent writer informs us wat whereas in America
somewhat more than forty years ago, there wh
only one Romish church ; there are now twelre
CaUiolio sees; and a Catholic population of six
hundred thousand, worshipping in about foarban*
dred churches I Could this vast increase, so far
beyond the ratio advance of inhabitants in tin
United States, have taken place without the exok
cise of an influence much more powerful than u
open and candid appeal to the judgment of h
people by public discourses and printed argnmestif
This success will the less surprise every reader
who considers the great influence of females, »
pecially religious females, in society, and who re-
members that this is the sex for which the inatitih
tions now denounced and deplored are very cli
established. For one individual of the other so j
induced to spend his days in the seclusion of 1 1
monastery, one hundred females may be foioj
willing or constrained to enter the precmcts ofi
convent. When we call to mind the power wlikk
mothers have over their children, in conneetiii
with the depth and strength of tihe impressiiMJ
made upon them at that early and tender age, itiij
impossible not to look with fearful appreheofisj
on any material increase of establishments tendof I
to remove fhe rising race of females from mtjA
and aecustom them to habits utterly nnfittiogi'
domestie Ufa. This must even be felt to refeNMi|

nx MONTHS m A OOMYBNT.

rica and
AX ot tba
reoeuttj
i !oi this
iblio zeal.
QAmeriei
there wu
ow twehe
lon of nx
b f oat ban*
ase, 80 in
nta in tlM
X the ei»
Enl than la
[neQt of the
argomeotst

)very w«to
lemaleSfO'
Lnd who «•
1 the institB'
> very chielj
he other ill
Bcbaionoli
fty be fomi
,recinct8jl»|
powet
connecfin!
impresai*]
ider age, it'll

mentstenfl]
from Bocajii

jlt tnielfl"*

k> laoh as may be expected, after a oonTeutaal
eonne, to forfeit their xash and early tows, and en-
ter the state for whieh God and nature designed
them. With referenee to the rest, who either spend
thehr lives in secliudony or emerge with a determin-
ation to adopt as few <rf the maxims and manners
of general sooietj, even of a Christian character,
as possiUe, we entertain a different set of feelings ;
at the same tfane feelings inyolving even greater
regret, tibat the fairest portions of God's image on
earth should he marred and rendered almost totally
nselesB by mistaken notions of his own will.

To return to Miss Beed*B publication, and the
[eredit to whieh that lady is entitled. Gatholics of
Iformer ages, and in countries which so far as re-
ligion is concerned they almost claim as their own,
rere seldom anxious to refute or to answer any one
rho might happen to ixnpugn their proceediugs.
kt m such countries as England and the United
itea this sileneiB is neither politio nor safe ; and
work like Miss Beed^i left unanswered to make
way in society, would be a dangerous foe to the
lolio system, especially to that mysterious de-
ment of it which she has witnessed and de-
^uiced. It is not often, that, when answers are
ibliahed to attacks like this, the^ are put forth by
^ individuals personally and mimediately con-
rned in the aiffairs in question: some other
ibe, well instructed in the mysteries of tiie sys-
is generally employed, who discovers deep arid
"owfal indignation that those whom he holds in
reverence for their superior wisdom and piety
Id be the objects of wanton assault But in
present ease, from its nature and peenliarities.

•UPPLBMBlfT TO

it WM necessary that the person most eomplained
of —the Saperior of ihe oonyeni— should appear in
her own defence, and step for once from her rigid
seclasion into the arena of eontroyersj.

This she has done ; and at some futnre time we
may possibly giye to the pnblio an edition of her
little work. Bnt at present we mast confine our
attention to Miss Reed, and while we examine her
general claims to public confidence, must take some
notice of what she adyances in defence of her bold
and approyed assault It must be manifest to eveiy
one that much was said by the Superior and the
Bishop, when Miss Beed first entered tiie convent,
tending apparently to leaye her at perfect libertj
to make her own deliberate choice. In some por-
tions of Iho narratiye those great and graye per-
sonages eyen seem to throw early disconragementi
ki her way, and ahnost to dissuade her from be-
coming a recluse. How far this was done to pie-
pare for such a contingency as her eeoape, and for
the defenca of a system against an attack like ben
eyery reader must judge. On a comparison of bar
early indulgence and ttie candour of her first treit-
ment, with the gradual harshness she met wiQi,
and tiie seyerities she soon found practiced on snA
as had been some time in the conyent, we are eoo*
strained to infer that the Bishop and Saperior bid
long been oonyinced of the necessity of sneh art to
constrain young females of the present day to nb-
mit themselyes to their control

Feeble instruments, as they appear, have
been the occasion of great and important ohi
in society. Miss Reed, should she prosper, us i<h«|
has to some extent already, in diminishing tbe io- <

IIZ MONTHS nr ▲ OOMTBNT.

flaenee of flit ^jitem ih* d«iioiiiieei, ii not the fini
female of obMore origin and slender retonrees and
uJents, whose efforts to overthrow tyranny and nn-
mtfk bigotry and hypocrisy, hare been orowned
with dgnal saeeess. ist there is nothing in the
faee of the narrati?a which wonld imply her ex-
pectation of any great and important resnlt She
is eharged with an attempt to destroy the Benedic-
tine oonvent, and it is qnite poisible that her book
may lead to its ultimate dissolution i bnt nothing
like a design or a hope of this sort appears in the
book itsdf ; and in a statement since published in
defenoe of the work she expressly disclaims all such
motives in publishing ii

Suppoaing the namtiTa respecting Miss Mary
Magdalene to be correct, what mnst be said of the
eold and heajrtiess cmelty with which that meek
oreatnre was treated ! Unless the Saperior is pre-
pared with Bomething mora direct and cironmstsn-
tial than a fierce and flat denial of the whole affitir,
to repel this part of Miss Bead's accnaation, no
donbt can be entertained of this alone going Tery
, far towards bringing down the pnUie indignation
Upon the system generally aa well as the instita-
[tion in partionlar.

In a snpplement to Miss Beed*s NarratiTC there

[is a passage, in which she is represented as ao-

»nnting in a very rational manner for her first dis-

osition to enter the convent, and in which, also,

ihe candidly disclaims all intention to injure that

'istitntion, except as a plain statement of facts ex-

erienced and witnessed by herself may have that

endeney. ** I have never wished to conceal that I

ras no doubt mistaken in thinking a lomafttic

BUPPLBIIXIIT to

spirit, tnd the grief and afliiotton which foUowed
the death of my mother, were a reUgions seal
for aecliuion from the world. My feeUngs have
from infanoy been easily affected, and in goine
into the convent as I did, every one must see
that I was inflaenced more by imagination than by
Judgment I now wish others, who may be in-
flaenced as I was by false views of things, to un-
derstand the real natnre of convents. I am sore I
have only told what took place there, and haye in
no case exaggerated it. fi what takes place in a
eonvent onght to be approved, and indnoe Protes-
tants to send their ehildren there, then I have done
nothing thai eonld injure it, but wonld help it with
the pnbliA. I wonld merely ask wheti^er, i! what
I saw and heard was wrong, and yet was concealed
from ^e pnblio by the Community, I have done
wrong in telling it in the manner I have, and in
allowug it to be published, after my name was
brought before the public in order to condemn me.
This refleetion relieves my mind from the pain I
should otherwise feel at the reproaches of the Sn-
perior in her answer. I do not feel that I have
deserved them. While I was at the convent at
first, my imagination was wrought up to the high-
est ; and believing the Roman Catholic to be the
mily true religion, I was zealous to persuade all
others to embrace it ; but I never wished to take a
cross, and go thrpugh the streets of Boston, makiiig
known the true faiSi, as the Superior represeoti.
1 believe my friends will admit that I never, ob
any occasion, eondueted, or wished to oondoctD;-
self, id that maimer."
It appears that one great inducement to Mis

r •

SIX MONTHS IN A OONTBNT.

Beed'i early detevminatioii to enter a convent, wm
her a«eidentel interoonrso with a Frehbh gentle-
man, of the name of Bodique, who boarded at the
honae of a married aiater whom she was in the
habit of fiaiting at Boaton. She candidly conf eaaea
that ** he had much inflnence on her mind in in-
dneing her to join the Gatholica." He aeema to
have met her in another Catholic family she was
acGoatomed to viait— to have resorted to her father's,
to give her instruction in the principles of the
Catholic faith and diacipline— to have adopted
some qneationable methods to preserre her atten-
tion fixed on what he deemed an important object
—and to have done all this in the face of a know-
ledge that her fother and family were adT^rse to
iny change in her religion. It is scarcely to be
wondered that a naturally romantic and snsce|ptiUe
mmd dkoold, under such tuition, and immediately
on the death of her mother, have turned her affec-
tiona towarda a convent— especially as her dying
parant appears to have left this as her last request,
that if ahe could discover any other church more
holy than the Protestant, she would unite herself
to it." She thought the Papal church more holy,
and acted accordingly.

The offioioua interference of M. Rodique is a
sample of the minute, individual, incessant seal,
exerted by Catholics of all classes and countries, to
berease, if but one inaignificant individual, prose-
lyteatotheur community. Very aeldom would it
be found that a Protestant gentleman of any de-
I nomination, accidentally lodging at a citizen's
|honie, would take mueh pains, or any pains at all
to convert a young, and Inexperienced relation of

100

SUPPLBMBNT TO

his hostetni to the peeuliaiitieB of his own faith.
Bat here we haye a Catholio genUeman, ayailinj
himsell of the first iiitimation that a yonng protes.
taut girl might he induced to hecome a convert to
Popery, if not, indtetriously endeavonring to ex-
eite the first disposition towards snch a change in
her immature mind I '

This condnot was )^ more reprehensible as well
is remarkable on iccoont of the studied secresy
with which it proceeded to its purpose. The fa-
ttier of Miss Reed, it is incidentidly admitted, hew
of hi^ visits to his daughter, and disapproved of
i^em I while he either feared or felt himself nnable
to prevent them. M. Bodique was a lodger, and
we believe a boarder, at the house of his married
daughter, and he might hesitate to do any ihin^
that should offend him. At all events, though he
once threatened to forbid him the house, if not
turn him out of it, he never appears to have adopt-
ed either the milder expedient or the more formid-
able extremity. But even these visits were un-
known to the sister of Miss Reed, at whose house the
ofilcious emissary dwelt; and though in his con-
versation with her and her husband, the subjects
of Catholicism and Convents often arose, he was
cautiously silent about them in reference to their
young and romantic sister.

Now what would be said, even by such an one,
of a Protestant gentleman thus searching out the
retreats of a young girl, and keeping his move*
ments as secret as possible from those who were
likely to prevent them ? No imputation bejond a
reli^ous motive ever seems to have been ente^
tained against tiiis Catholic zealot ; and yet sncb

■I

SIX H0NTH8 IN A OONYBHT.

101

conduct, had he been a Protestant, wonld scarcely
have fidled to bring down upon him the reproach,
the execration, dne to a purposed seducer —even
though he had pleaded zeal for the conversion of
the object of his pursuit to the important peculi-
arities of his creed, and observances of his rclifg^ous
worship. Another ingenious device em^lojMl by
the Bishop (Fenwick, we believe, was his name),
to proselyte this young female, must not be passed
over. It should be observed^at she had an elder
sister ahready with the Catholics, named, either in
her first Protestant dk her second Popish baptism,
Theresa, after the patroness saint of the order to
which she belonged ; and this circumstance must
have greatly encouraged both the Bishop and his
agent M. Bodique to hojM thai another of the
family might yield to their sway. In this hope
the Bishop obtained— likely through his lay friend's
inflaence with the family— an interview with Be-
becca. Then he addressed her in terms of solemn
admonition, which she acknowledges very deeply
impressed her cons cienee and heart, and in piurt*
ing with her, said— *< We shall make ft good
Catholic of you,"— lending her two volumes con-
taining a Talet with which the Catholic peculiari-
ties of faith and worship were artfully blended.
These volumes were almost immedii^y taken
back to the Bishop by Mr. Pond, her ristef^a hus-
band— a circumstance that goes far to pnivs thsit
the Novel they contained was not deemed quiti
proper for a young girl to read. Very reluctantly
did she consent to l£eir being returned.

Even these devices, however, skilM •» tilAf
were, wonld in all pxobabililj have idled, but for

109

iUPPLBMBMT TO

an etalj and avowed predispoaiiion to Popery aad
to a oonvent life in Bebecoa'a mind. On the other
hand, we cannot wonder, that, having heard of
this disposition and the Ihuik and pnblio avowal
of it, the Bishop should make the nsnal effort of
his fraternity to gather this feeble nnsnspectiDg
lamb into the Catholio fold. Bat who ean over-
look the oharaoter stamped on the system of pro-
selytism, by the almost infancy of the age, amidst
which even a Bishop and an elderly lay gentleman
deem it their duty to beat np for recruits. Did we
find them labouring in their vocation ezclusivelj,
or chiefly, among &ose whose years enable Uiem
to judge for themselves, and to embrace witii calm
deliberation, if they embrace at all, the mysterions
discipline of the Romish Church, little of animad-
version would be leftfor a critic of their proceedings
to publish. These grave personagesi however,
in despair of success among adults, are seen east-
ing their baits among mere children ; and by craft,
when they cannot do it by force, removing them
from parental control, shutting them up in a prison,
and interposing their assumed authority between
&em and all their natural protectors, and their most
faiti^ful and affectionate friends. All efforts to
render others religious and moral are best made at
an early age.

" Cbiidren like tender osien take the bow,
And as they flnt are foshion'd always growf '

But the efforts before us are made to change the '

religion of children, and that at the expense of at

least one branch of moral obligation— to the bxeieh

at least of one precept of the' moral law— the one

ittading at the bead of the second table, and whit

SIX MONTHS III A OOMYENT.

103

ii emphatioally called the Jlrtt eomfnandmeni with
promise'^** Honour thy fatbor wnd mother.'^ Saoh
efforts shonld, in all oandoar and eonscienee, be
roserred for an age in whioh parental authority is
about to cease, and the individnals assailed are be-
eoming masters of their own jadgmenl as well as
persons.

In the narratiye of Miss Beed's sednsion, men-
tion is frequently made of Maiy Francis, thus
named after die entered the convent ; bnt before
known as Miss Kennedy, and spoken of in an early
part of the Tolume as having moyed from Boston,
on the arrival of a domestic at the honse of Be-
becea's fi^er in search of her. We have read
certain letters of this young lady addressed to Miss
Bead, never intended for publication, but which
the latter has been constrained to publish in her
own defence against the reproaches of the lady St
George, the Superior of the convent. There is
not only an apparent breach of confidence here on
the part of Miss Beed, but she becomes by this act
the matmment— a reluctant one she confesses— of
exposing her young fkiend to the Superior's ven-
geance -if such an evil emotion can find place in
Uie devout bosom of a lady Abbess.

** TantMBc animis oMlestibus li»r

We are not anxious either whollv to justify, or
severely to censure this pari of Imss Beed's con-
dnct The sufforings of Mary Frauds in the eon*
vent, like her own, had already been great, and
coold scarcely be increased by any further inflic-
tion of the Superior's anger or nudiee. But this
anger and mahce alfrays appear to have been com-
pletely under the control of a mind of singular

104

BUPPLBIIBNT TO

potency and policy. The Saperior conld behave to.
ward* her pupils, wheneyer she pleased, and it
would better answer her chief pnrpose, with well
dissembled tdndness and great condescension of
manners ; and the probabmty is, that this more
gentle and winning character became assumed to-
wards Miss Kennedy, the better to sustain the
trembling reputation of the convent amidst the
storm which Miss Beed was evidently able to raise
agahist it Th^re is reason to believe that Miss
Kennedy, on the appearance of her letters, was re-
moved to another convent, if not afterwards to a
third. Her name, too, was changed from Maiy
FraneU to Mary PauZtna— for what motive the
reader mnst Judge, and with what success may he
inferred when it iis known that her parents were
Catholics, and therefore not only disposed to ap-
prove of her treatment, but also to acquiesce in
these pious artifices to deceive the public respect-
ing her.

Miss Kennedy writes like a good Catholic as well
as a friend to Wmb Beed. Her admission of what
was wrong in the convent is au admission of ahnse
of what in itself she considers perfectly right
«Do not"— she says— "let any thing you haye
seen disgust you witii our holy religion.'* ** Has
not our Lord said that scandals must come ? can
ought but a good thing be abused, or a holy thing
profaned f** ** Forgive me for presuming to
preach ; I am so anxious for you to make the hest f j
use of your suflferings.'* '* May they make yon
more pleasing to the divine Saviour of mankind.''
** Ton have, my dear Agnes, unfastened the golden
IkdE whiah rivets, more dosely than any other,

glX X0NTR8 IN A CONVENT.

105

•onl to soul tnd heart to hetrt ; but jov are aiiU
loved and interesting to me. Oh, dear one, what
has during these few months made snoh sad raTa-
ges in your heart Reileot on yonr observation to
me. ' I am eonvinced that the Catholio religion
is tiie only tme one.' Can yon bnry in oblivion
ibis yonr own fervent protestation f and also the
happy moments passed before that religion's hal-
lowed altars f Ha^e yon abandoned it beeanse yon
fotmd erime and deceit in some of its professors
and in some of its ministers ? Was not one of the
ehosen apostles of onr divine Bedeemer a traitor ?
lid not* oar Lord say 'scandals mnst eomef
/ome, where ? In the ehnrch, nndonbtedly.''

A, remark or two on these extracts. The letters
h^jUdch tiiey are made are deemed by Miss
Tnrotestant friends remarkably eonfirmatory
of all her charges of seTority against the Superior,
and of abuses and emelties in the eonTenl We
confess we see no snch confirmation in them. We
shoidd have believed Miss Reed's charges to the
fall without them, and perhaps onr faith in her
plain statement would even have been mora impH-
di We do not mean that they weaken our confi-
dence in her special accuracy any more than in her
general integrity ; but they put so sacred ft eon-
stmetion on her sufferings— ttiey throw such an air
of mystery and even sublimi^ over the scene <^
Jier trials— they evincif so profound an attechment

the institution amidst aU its abuses— they show
so clearly what one young person may revile as in
itself evil, another may advocate as only sustaining
occasional evil abuse,— that we are inclined to
think that Miss Beed's friends, and that young

106

BUPPLEMBNT TO

ladj herself, WQuld have done ner eanse qidte m
mnoh good by wiihholdiiic[ as by publishing them.

It is also nezf to impossible for us to look over
these letters and not ask— Is not the hand of Joab
in all thii t May not OTon the Superior's influ.
ence, if not the Bishop's aid, be detected in most
of what Miss Franois writes f The fine tarns of
expression which the letters eontain— the clever
appeals they make to Miss Beed's Judgment and
eonsdenoe as well as heart— the yagne indefinite
language in whieh some abuses are admitted^the
opening left for a stranger to infer that tiiese aba-
ses regarded the system of Popery generally rather
than eonyents in particular— &e insinuations that
while the CSathoUo religion admits abuse, m th
pwreit system on the face of the earth, its conyen-
tual holy places f undsh a retreat from the danger,
and inyolye no other suffering than what is ealea-
lated to obyiate the far worse eyil of sinning,-
these go far towards eonyincing us that whateyer
apprehensions the chiefs of the conyent entertain
from Miss Beed*s statement, they cherish not i
moment's f^ from the letters of her more Catholit
and consistent friend.

This yiew of her letters, howeyer, enhances the
indignation with which we contemplate the discip-
line of these nurseries of superstition. They an
not conducted and controlled by ignorant zealoti
who know not what they do ; but by shrewd an^j
discerning politicians, who are capable of tuning
almost eyery incident into an occasion of defence.
Theur motto is— The end justifies the means ; ind
haying giyen their end the most exalted charaeter-
haying settled the point, at least with themselTM,

gIZ MONTHS IN A COimBllT.

10?

that ttieir ^jstem !• infalliblt tad divine— they
itop it no eipedient however eraftj, they withhold
DO effort howoTor hmniliating and oenanrable, to
•clTflBoe a eanie paramount to every other npon
earth. Their settled dnbr to God ia, the farther-
inee of the Gatholie religion ; and to man is, his
conTersion to this religion and this f nrtherance of
it; and to these two branehes of what they deem
dlTine and faifallible legislation, all human eonneo-
tioni and eonrtesy, propriety and feeling, give
way, and they boast of an honourable victory in
triumphing over and trampling upon them.

Another resort for sustaining the integrity of
Miss Beed, and the fidelity of her evidence against
the convent, has been made by her friends. Some-
time before she entered it, she had been at a
school in Boston, under the care of two sisters
whose names do not appear farther than in their

hdtiils— the Misses S There can be no

doubt of their respectability as superintendents of
an accredited and talented seminary, and also as
members of the episcopal church in Boston, of
which the Bev. Dr. Crosswell is the esteemed pas-
tor. It is to be regretted that the histrnction of
Miss Beed in this school was reetrtcted to em-
broidery and needle-work, for whi^ (ihe had « su-
perior taste, and in which she becamie an acknow-
[ledged proficient. A little volume is now before
I whidi says that ** ahe was pitticularly expert
maUng lace, then much in fa||^on £j>nt while
[imder the care of the Misses. ••;, tfM^ok no
[lessons except in needle-work.*' ^ P^^
This, we repeat, is to be regretted, lili ae-
lowledged thai *< she was far from bi^f ignor*

108

•UFPLBMBNT TO

ant; appeared as intelligent aa most yoang ladiei
of her age, and alwaya oonfened with correctnesi
and propriety. ** Her mind " — the Tolume goei
on to •fty--" appeared very capable of improve-
ment/' Why then, we naturally ask, was not her
mind improved in tiiia Protestant school, and by
teachera ao capable of e£fecting the desirable and
easy work? why waa it left in its imperfect indpi.
ent atate to receiTe its improvement, if saoh it
might be called, in a Catholic Seminary, and
through the discipline of a convent? 'Why was
this toider sapling removed from a garden o! free
air, in which it already grew and flourished, to be
transplanted to a foreign forcing house amidst all
manner of stunted, and crooked, and useless exo-
tics 7 ** She often expressed a wish,*' we are told,
" to enter the convent that she might eompUU hir
education,** Now, without putting any bar npon
her .entering a convent, when she came of an age
ybform an enlightened and deliberate judgment,
leina ask why £d not her numerous and zealooi
friends aomehow contrive to let her education k
eomplettd before her entrance, and thus give her
the chance, at least, of choosing not to enter at all f
The testimony of ttiese Protestant sisters, whose
tuition of Miss Reed was so strangely limited to
manual ingenuity to the neglect of intelleetml
studies, and so far as it appears even of religion
lessons, expressly confirms all that has been vA
of the influence of M. Bodique over her mindii
favour of Catholicism. This gentleman, they le-
knowledge, ** met her at their house at the tb
aha waa talking of going into the convent, vA
proposed to introduce her to the Bishop 1" Kiji

SIX MOMTBB IH ▲ OOlfVEIIT.

109

ha appean to hw% tok«n bar from their honM to
the Bishop*! retidenoe 1 1

We should not laj the strest wo do on theio oir-
enmstanoeSy were not the ladiei Tolnnteem among
those who rejoice in her esoape from ihe conTOnt,
who testify in favour of her eharges aaainat it, and
who thus far appear on the stage as adrersaries of
the institation. We applaud tibeir zeal in all this ;
bat wh J did tiieir seal lidamber so much and so
long at an earlier period, when they onsht to have
been awake and actiye in pweventing thew months
mffering that Miss Beed underwent, (i9tt^ no-
thing of the Catholie reproach that will no^M|^w
her to the grave, and perchance somewhat ha^|||
her arrival there. They pleaded, indeed, for kil
being allowed to take her Bible and prayer book
with her into the convent : but when told that her
prayer book must not accompany her, and that she
mnst have no other than the CathoHc version of
the Bible, they discover no emotion, they make
neither opposition nor protest. Nay, they seem
wantonly or wilfully to neglect an opportnni^ pe-
enliarly favourable for changing her mind and
arresting her progress. Her first intercourse with
the Bishop was not satisfactory to hersell * She
was not pleased with his conversation ;" and ** she
ippeared less disposed to go to the convent after
that interview than she hsl done before." What
a favourable juncture this for a strong and united
remonstrancefromher Protestant friends? What
i tide in her sllairs which- they might have taken
lit the flood f where was Dr. Orosswell at this time,
hrhen M. Rodique and the Bishop were so near at
^and and ready for action f

110

•UPPLUIBMT to

W« Mk theie qoMiioiis more in tonow thtn in
tnger, and with ui« pnrpoM of waning other pa-
mta and taaebaniy othar patroni and friends of
yonng femalaa who ara axposad to the insidiooi
anarea of Popei7» either from the reetleis Tigilanee
of ita emiaaarieay or tha fomantie diapoBition o!
their own minda. Tha entire affidr befoie m
ahowa, what mnat often haya appeared on other
avidenee before onr readera, that Catholic ceremo-
niea and aentimenta hare a remarkable tendency to
impraaa in their layonr, minda of thia east In
Proteatant oonntriea we daily witnesa tiie effect of
religiooa diaplay and parade on anoh persons, and
how much more powMfnl ia their at&action than
that of tha aimple and aolemn perfonnance of
Ghriatian worahip I In Proteatant and enlightened
England, what mnltitadea are attracted bj pnblio
meetinga and platform axhibitiona, and how de-
lighted they are with those parte of the oheqaeied
a&ir in which the ridienlona forma the nearest
possible coalition with tha anblime I Urge them
mora freqnentiy to attend the nsoal week-nigbt
aerfiaea of their aeyeral ministers, and they will
plead their want of time ; but let some more novel
and aiciting scene be adyertisedy at another and
distant plaM of worship, and time can easily be
fonnd for attepjdance an hour earlier, and two boon
later 1 Moreoyer, money can be spared for the
collection, and eyery kind of sacrifice can be en-
dared for the sake of witnessing the show and lis-
tening to tha speeches of anch an occasion, by
mnltitadea who haya no aympathy with their own
dewr deserted minister, and no taste for his pUin
week-night sermona and prayera I

ftx MOKTBs ni ▲ oomrmv.

Ill

Ii the laeeaM of OilhoUe Mtlt than, a matter of
wonder in the preeenl ter in Eagland any more
than in Ameriea— is XiOnaiMi mj more than in Bos-
ton and CSiarlestown f Gan we be enrpriaed at tha
rapid inereaae and effort of that leal, unidit a peo-

Sle so wdl prepared for its meretriciona embrace
y the weak inventions of Protestant folljf Are
W6 astonished to hear that so many, trained for the
nataral transit at a gay and noisy I^otestant chapel,
not a hundred miles from Finsbuy, should so
eagerly pass oyer to the still more pompons and
enchanting temple that modem Popery has famish-
ed, to reeeive and welcome such bntterfly saints ?
▲ most remarkable instance of this rkotestant
Popery, if we may thna associate terms of sworn
opposition, took place in a city distingnished by
its enlightened inatitntions and inhabitants, a few
years ago. It is not mentioned here with any
other motiTO than to confirm the troth of what has
been advanced, and illostrate tha yiews which are
taken of the tendehcy of mnch that takes place in
Protestant assemblies to farther the Catholic caose.
An impostor of singalar attractions in person,
eostome, and speech, gained access to several re-
gpeotable famihea as the*heir of a noble title and
estate; which have since, by the death of the then
possessor, descended to their rightful expectant.
His pablio addresses, first from the balcony of his
hotel, and afterwards in almost every pnblic room
of the oity in which he had taken np his temporary
abode, created such an interest in his favour, that
a large portion of the constituency hailed with rap-
tpre his announcement at tha ova of a general elec-
tion, to become a candidate for the representationi

112

8UPFLEMEKT TO

in opposition to two excellent members, who ez-
peeted to be retnrned for the third time without
opposition. While his popular talents and speeches,
with a large share of assumed philanthropy and
teeming condescension of manner, gained him sev-
eral thoasand followers among Uie lower orders,
no small number of religions and respectable per-
sons of all denominations, were delighted with his
warm avowals of attachment to religion ; and some
were evoi willing to make any sacrifice in their
power for his advancement to the very head of the
political and religions institutions of the place.

Among his admirers was a lady who conducted
a respectable boarding school, and who had deemed
it an honour to receive a poor child under her pro-
tection, which he had just before, for some reason
of his own, thought fit to receive as his own pro-
tege. The little girl was placed among her scholars,
and the patron was always a welcome visitor at the
schooL In fact, he became the idol of the inbtita-
tion, and the venerated friend of its respectable con-
ductress. Special and extraordinary visits were at
length arranged, and one took place marked with
peculiar importance, not only by its religions
character, but by the solemn preparations that pre*
ceded, and the novel scenes and ceremonies that
attended it. A ceutial seat was elevated anil
adorned for the distinguished guest: and report
Bays that a splendid canopy was placed over it
On either side, but on a level with &e floor, were
chairs tastefully arranged for the governess and
her mother, on the left and right hand of the pre*
aiding genius of the evening ; and for their inferior
visitors and the teachers of the sohool, on therij '

SIX MONTHS IN ▲ GONVBNT.

113

who ex-
I withont
Bpeecbes,
ropy and

L him 867-
Br orders,
table pet-
i witb his
and some
;e in theii
lead o! the
) place.
I conducted
bad deemed
der her pro-
ome reason
[g own yro-
,er scliolais,
iBitorattbe
the inbtita-
lectablecon*
isits^ereat
narked v?ith
M religions
onB that pie*
^monies that
elevated and
and report
aced over it
^ floor, vfere
ovemesB and
d of the pre*
their inferior
l,ontlieri|

tnd left of fhem. The other parts of the room
were oeonpied in most admired order by the seve-
ral soholfurs and their yonng friends; while the
yonng protege, beantifnlly dressed, was placed on
an ottoman at the feet of her illnstrions benefactor
and adopted father, who was sainted by his assum-
ed title of Sir William, and congratnlated as an ex-
pectant earl I Before him was a handsome table,
an elegant cushion, and a snperb Bible ; and after
the refreshments of tea and coffee, he delivered ad-
dresses and offered prayers, which were listened to
with more profound attention and fervent applause,
than any one of the forty clergymen of the city
ever received. What ceremonies or amusements
followed, beyond a little sacred and profane sing-
ing, we are not with certainty informed. Rumour
spoke, at the time, of a dance, but we mention it
as a rumour, and not as a reajify.

And why have we described the scene at all ?
Not certainly to dwell upon, still less to rejoice
over the fate of the individual thus exalted and
honoured. The assumed Sir William was soon
after convicted of swindling and perjury, and es«
caped transportation by a successful plea of insan-
ity ; which has, however, given him a place in a
hnatic asylum, at l^ast for the period of his intend-
ed transportation, and perchance for life. But the
scene is described for the purpose of admonition
and remonstrance. Where there is a disposition
among Protestants, and Protestants of education
and respectability, to make on any occasion this
,Q8e of their religion^this parade of a system
[Whose motto is that the kingdom of ChrUi U not
i tUt world — are not all the young people, espe-

114

BUPFLEMSNT TO

cially the yonn^ females, who witness such scenes,
and behold their parents and teachers, and even
pastors^ delighted with them, more than prepared
at the first opportunity, if not to enter a convent,
to become members of the so called holy and m-
f allible community of Bome f

To retnm, perhaps for the last time, to our first
subject Miss Beed's narrative is said to have ac-
quired a vast and increasing oironlation in America,
and it will no doubt be very generally read in
this country. Let it be so-^not merely or chiefly
to remunerate a spirited publisher, or the pnb-
Ushers of any other edition, for their cost and care ;
but, above every other consideration, to render the
fair authoress as general a benefit as she can be-
come to the rising age of the Protestant world.
Her primary object appears to have been the jasti-
fioation of her conduct in clandestinely escaping
from the convent ; and the purpose of her friends,
in the support they have come forward to give her
testimony and character, is chiefiy the refutation
of what they deem the selfish and slanderous an*
swer which her narrative provoked from the Supe-
rior. But let our principal purpose, in giving a
British circulation to these interesting facts, and
by which we are aiming to illustrate them, he the
benefit of those churches, and families, and kdi*
vidnals, to whom we are united by a common bond
of Protestant sentioient and feeling. Far, very
far, let our thoughts be removed fromi the least in-
tention to inflame the publio mind— already, per-
haps, tf^o much heated — against Uie Superiors or
•ubordinates, the priests or the people, of Catholio
diurohes. But this evil may be shunned witboat

proci

Ihed

weab

ramp

their

nndcj

tate, 1

let it

theB

munit

mere<

hneai

sacred

Poperj

power

the me

of thoi

name-|

thepei

deed to

their ]

tribntii

idolatrj

seem t(

the ohf

the gosl

ihey cl(

for hi

of, thel

death,

such itA

in soripl

must'

0H- V

nX M09THS IN A €X>Ny£NT.

116

proceeding to the other extreme of indifference to
the danger of Protestant -youth, especially of the
weaker sex, from the restless ambition of a once
rampant, bat now fallen heirarehy, to substitute in
their warm affections the traditions of men for the
nndefiled gospel of ** the blessed and only Poten-
tate, the Kmg of kings, and Lord of lords." For
let it never be lost sight of, that the contest between
the Romish church and the yarious OTangelical com-
munities which protest against it, is not one of
mere circumstance and ceremony^ of mere discip-
line and authority— but of religious principle, of
sacred and essential truth. The foundation of
Popery and the faith of Papists stand, not in the
power of God, but in the wisdom of men— not in
the merits of Christ, but in the works and yirtues
of those who borrow in order to blaspheme his
name— not in the blood of the Covenant, but in
the penances and prayers of those, who profess in
deed to be his disciples, but deny him the^'glory of
tiieir purification and redemption. Without at-
tributing to Catholics the absurd and besotted
idolatry which the objects they bow before would
seem to deserve for them, it is sufficient to support
the charge of their departure from the true failh of
the gospel, and the spiritual worship of God, Uiat
they claim in any sense and in any degree a merit
for human doings, superadded to, or independent
of, the merit of Christ^*' His obedience unto
death, even the death of the cross." There is no
raeh thing in existence. The thought is exploded
in scripture, and the assumption in whatever form
must be abhorrent to all right Christian feeling.
Spedons advooatea for convents have pleaded

^•'

♦"»

116

SUPPLEMENT TO

thus— << The works perfonned in those retreats o!
piefyt at all events, bear no resemblance to the
I^arisaie works oensnred by onr«Lord, which were
wrought ostentationsly to be ieen of men," Still
they may partake, and we fear do partake, of the
fullest essence of a self-righteous character, being
done for a jpnrpose, if possible, more adverse to
Christian principles, and therefore more displeas-
ing to God, than ostentation and display— to pro-
pitiate divine favotbr and purchase heavenly bless-
edness. Those whose religion ostentatiously invites
the public gaze, and whose chief object is human
approbation and applause, excite pity for their
weakness and vanity, and are finely satirised and
dismissed by the only encouragement that divme
liberality can bestow upon them—** Verily, I say
unto you, ye have your reward." But those take
more presumptuous ground, and are guilty of
greater impiety, who conclude that, by an ingeni-
ous system of penance and seclusion, they can
either e£fect that for themselves which the death
of Christ alone accomplishes, or can add by their
own sacrifices to the Value and virtue of his aton-
ing death I

Such efforts to expfate human guilt, and mortify
the passions of a corrupt nature, supposing them to
be approved or tolerated by God— >which is impos-
sible—have no utility, and consequently uo moral
worth, as public examples tending to the general
good. The ostentatious self-righteous man may, in
many respects, be an useful one in society. While
the principles of his conduct are concealed and do
no injury, his actions may do considerable good-
often more good from the forward zeal with which

they I
publu
clusio
areof
qnalitj
ety^ oi
design
while i
tureai
in proi
govemi
dncing

christia
tanceai
woald X
This
the last I
of her c
more or
whomi]
control i
the evil
too hea^

pears in I

secret si]
hope anc
the mela,
&gcoQ8a]
other evil
experien?
^issBed
tte bondl

feats ol
to the
oh were
» Still
, of the
r, being
yerse to
displeas-
•to pro-
ly bless-
ily invites
is human
lor their
irised and
dat divine

ily, I aay
those take

guilty oi
an ingeni-
they can
the death
d by their
I his aton-

md mortify
ingthemto
h is impos'
J uo moral
the general
nan may, in
ety. Witte
aled and do
able gooa-
mih wbicb

BIX MONTHS nV ▲ OONYBNT.

117

fhey are mnlfciplied and forced as it were on the
public attention. * Bnt the system of monastic se-
olnsion, while its presumption and self-confidence
are offensive to God, has none of the subordinate
qualities of utility among men. Nay, it robs soci-
ety of the benefit which all personal religion is
designed, and adapted, and required to render;
while its only relative effect is, from its very na-
ture and necessary operation, painfully injurious,
in promoting some of the worst feelings in both the
governing and governed towards each other — in-
ducing the one to a severity at variance with both
christian and natural feeling, and the other to resis-
tance and reluctant compliance whenever resistunce
would not prevail or dare not appear.

This is remarkably manifested from the first to
the last of Miss Beed's narrative. The six months
of her conventual life was one continued contest,
more or less in action, between her and those to
whom in an evil moment she had yielded up the
control of her conscience and conduct Nor was
the evil confined to ^r^who soon felt the yoke
too heavy for her to bear, and resolved on an early
escape from the intolerable thraldom; but it ap-
pears in a more affecting form in the private com-
plaints of her less resisting companions — ^in their
secret sighings and murmurings, who had not the
hope and dared not cherish the wish to escape from
the mehmcholy prison house. In these less cour-
ageous and more submissive disciples, we see an-
o&er evil tendency of the system, not elicited and
experienced, at least for any length of time, by
Miss Reed. She early bvoke the yoke and burst
the bonds asunder, and now appeals openly to tiie

SUPPLBiailT TO

world for the JnBtifloatioii of her oondnot ; bnt thej
priirately complain of hardehipe and onielties whicn
they have not the courage to aiirinoimt and scarce-
It the conecience to disapprove. Without charging
them with direct h^rpocnsy, in professing to submit
with Christian patience to what their heart and soul
must sometimes think strange, if not evil, it is enough
to show that they are restless and nnhappy—that,
however they may be striving to " learn of Him who
was meek and lowly in heart," they are far from feel-
ing the yoke they wear as Sia to be eaat/y or the bur'
dm they are told S$ imposes npon them to be light.

We look on these, and other fMral evils that wider
space would enable us to record, as some of the worst
tendendesof thesystem which we cordially unite with
Miss Reed hi denouncing. At the same time, it is
im^ssible to be silent on the pernicious influence
which the education of Protestant children in Catho-
lic schools must have on their present and future re-
ligioui character. The writer of these pages has wit-
nessed, in ditferent parts of Europe, what the Amer-
ican friends of Miss Keed apprehended is widely dif-
fusing its baneftd consequences in that countnr. He
has seen, in France and Flanders especially, the mo-
dem raffe^ as it may be called, of Protestant parents
for the education of their sons in the colleges and
their daughters in the convents of the Romish church.
At Surges, Ghent, and St. Homer especially, he
found large numbers of Protestant English children
availing uiemselves, under their parents' sanction, of
these opportunities, and thus, for the sake of a good
French education, resigning at once all their native
patriotic and Protestant feelings. To attend th«
routine of such schools, and not imbibe daily and
hourly the very spirit of the religion they are estab-
lished to propagate, is impossible. Either, therefore,
our Protestant oountiymen and oountgrwomen are

SIX MONTHS IN A COIIVBMT.

119

indifferent to what religions ehanoter their ohildreii
aognire^ or they oalomate too confidently on their
ability to connteraot, in after lifei joutmul prepoe-
sessions in favour of Popery.

Can it be expected that the Superiors of these es-
tablishments will forego their fJEtyonrite ceremonies P
or that they will allow exemptions and innovations
at variance with the assumed pre-eminence of their
•vBtem i* or that they will negteot the opportunities
thrown in their way Inr thoughtless Protestants, who
have not the same zeai for their peculiarities, and of-
ten no seal at all, of adding to their converts f What
(hen is tiie consequence P The children thus trans-
ferred become re^ilar attendants on the singular fro*
quenoy of Cathouo worsMp, and thus early converto
to the system ; or, alter six days attendance on week-
ly ceremonieSf they spend the sabbath with their pa-
rents, eiUier in the total neglect of all religious wor-
ship, at which they are taught to shudder, or being
allowed one reluctant attendance on a Protestant
service, always cold enough in England, and on the
continent proverbial for its heartless formality and its
worldly indifference I

Here the reader is conducted most unwittingly to
a prolific spring of the evil now deplored. If human
ingenuity had tasked itself to devise a plan for ex-
hibiting ProteBtantism in an unpopular light, it could
not have succeeded better than our counlxymen, both
lay and clerical, have done in their ecclesiastical ar-
rangements. More dull uninteresting services of a
relidpus nature never were witnessed, than those of
the English in the several continental towns in which
they congregate. It has been matter of some sur-

Srise that French vivadtv could ever tolerate the
nil music of Catholic worship—that a people so vol-
atile, and fond of the liveliest airs and movements in
all other places, can listen for hours together to the

il^

120

8CPFLB1IBNT TO

•

droning monotonouB tonea ol the best cathedral
dboirs. But jn the English churches there is no
music at all ; neither instrument nor voice is heard
in the praise of Ood ; nor is there any thing else
adapted to Irindle in the bosom a single spark of ap-
propriate oheerftil deyotion.

Contrasted with these lifeless senrioes, Catholic
ehurcthes all around present scenes of stirring attrac-
tion to the eye if not to the ear, and young persons
especially, are not backward in acknowledging the
difference, nor anxious to forego seasons of cheap and
welcome excitement, for the mere sake of perpetua-
ting a formal respect for the religion of their own
country. Through this cause alone, not a few Eng-
lish young ladies residing on the continent annually
become decided and acknowledged converts to ti^e
Romish church ; and many more renounce Protes-
tant services altogether, and, if they observe public
worship at all, observe it in a Catholic temple.

Awara of this continued chance of winning our
children « to the obedience of ^A#ir fidth," Catholic
priests, in towns to which English fiunilies resort,
are ever on the watch. Without Imputing to them
improper motives, every one on the spot must observe
tiiem evincing a j^liteness of behaviour, joined with
official zeal and vigilance, which iProtestant ministei s
would do well in a better cause to imitate. The
writer of these pages resided in a large French city
about twelve months, for the improvement of his two
daughters in the language, ana he had occasion to
notice the watchful temper of the priesthood in this
respect. His younger daughter, a mere child, heard
much from her Fr^ioh teacher of the excellence of a
certain young priest, who, in fact, was universally
esteemed by Jrrotestants as well as Catholics. The
teacher also had spoken to him of what she was
pleased te call her favourite pupil. A respectful

SIX H0NTH8 IN A COmTENT.

121

eathedral
ere is no
I is heard
thing else
irk of ap-

, Catholio
Qg attrao-
ig persons
edging the
^ cheap and
* perpetua-
meir own
I few Eng-
Lt annually
rerts to the
[ice Frotes-
erye publio
nple.

tinning onr
,," Catholio
lilies resort,
ng to them
Quat observe
joined with
At ministers
litate. The
French city
nt of his two
occasion to
hood in this
child, heard
cellence of a
I universally
hoUcs. The
lat she was
A respectful

meseage was one day delivered by the teacher firom
the pnest, requesting that on her n^t visit to his
house her little scholar might he allowed to accom-
pany her. The child herself was anxious to go, and
was highly delighted with his addresses itiid presents.
She has now been sometime in England, hut con-
tinues to speak with rapture of her reception at the

house of Monsieur M . Nor can ner parents

forego this opportunity of bearing their testimony in
his uvour. . They are persuaded that he never would
have sanetidbed the severity of which Miss Reed
oomplains, and would have been the first to lift up
his voice against the cruelties inflicted on |diss Mary
Magdalene.

Here, some will plead, there is the greater dangper ;
and that iSunilieB are more safe firom innovation amidst
evils like those which Miss Reed has exposed in
America, than fW>m the more plausible and pleasant
way chosen bv the French to effect the same purpose.
Supposing this to be admitted, the duty of Protestant
famflies m defBating that purpose is, to imitate the
amenity of our European nei^bours, rather than re-
taliate on the harshness and mhumanity of the Ca-
tholics of the new world. While caution and restraint,
to promote our childrens* fidelity to the Protestant
faith, are conducted with a temper like that which
marked Monsieur M««««'s efforts to conciliate them
in favour of Popery— while they are unallied with
the bitterness and unstained by the vice, which are
bad enough in Catholics, but worse in Protestant
zealots— such caution and restraint cannot be exer-
cised with too much vigilance and wisdom, too much
decision and perseverance.

In tills light Miss Reed's interesting narrative
will bear the strictest investigation. It is not a
recompensing evil for evil. It is not measuring to
the Catholics the measure which they have too often

i: i\

I ;

12^

8UPPLBMBNT TO

been ready to mete to the Protestanti. Her candid
•dmiBBion of all the sood treatment Bhe reoeiyed,
and her equally canoid admiBaion of the respect
and even reverenoe, with which thoee young in-
matea of the oonvei^t who Buffered much more than
heraelf, returned to those who bo cruelly treated
them, ahowa a temper in thia young writer vastly
auperior to that with which Catholic vicee and crimes
are too often recorded, eapeoially by those who have
Buffered under them. The very worat thing we have
heard apoken of Misa Reed— alwaya excepting the
vindictive and vituperative anawer of her Superior—
waa a remark to thia effect *^ Perhapa this young
lady waa averae to remaining In an institution v^hich
would compel her to continue in Bin.de blessedness.
Perhapa ahe had ''examined well mr blood," and
discovered that she could not long '^ endure Ihe livery
of a nun;"

" For aye to be In a shady doister mew'd,

To live a barren sister all her life.

Chanting fUnt hymna to the cold firuitlesB moon.**

PerhapB she had identified herself with Milton's lady,
and heard the fine and fEuscinating address of Comus—

"List, Bister, be not coy, and be not cozen'd
With that same vaunted name virginity.
Beauty ia nature^B coin, must not be hoarded,
But must be current, and the good thereof
Ck>nsi8tB in mutual and partaken bliss,
Unsavoury in th' enjoyment of itself :
If you let slip time, like a neglected rose
It withers on the stalk with languish'd head.*

Should this surmise of our heroine's motives be
lust, we will not censure her^we dare not cast either
the first or the last stone upon her. To violate a vow
—supposing her to have taken i^ which is itself a
violation ox nature and religion— ia a virtue to be ei-

•IX MONTHS m A OONTSNT.

138

toned rather than a Tioe to be reproached and con-
demned. To aisert the enprenuu^ of the divine yrffL
^-clearly intimated in creation— forming an eeeentJal
part of the maohineiy of divine Providence— and
ianct^ed aa well aa sanctioned by every dictate and
deaign of Chriitianity : — to aaaert the enpremaoy of
the divhie will, thus commended, over every edict of
human anthority, is acting a noble Christian part,
which, however it may have a direct aspect on onr
own comfort, ouffht not to be laughed or frowned to
sUenoe, as though the selfish feature of it robbed it
of all its goodness and beauty, and reduced it to a
mere paltiy subterfdge for individual private interest.
Should Miss Reed require support under such an
insinuation, greater than this argument or argument
of any Und can ftimish, she may appeal to no less an
example than the wife of Martin Luther— nay, to that
of the great reformer himself. The young lady that
he mamed— Catherine Boren— had been a nun, and
had escaped from a Saxon convent : and Luther him-
self; by his maniageu especially with such a lady,
gave pointedness and force to all his previous argu-
ments against the Catholic law of monastic celibacy,
which md then reached the consummation of its im-
moral abusea, aa well aa of ita lofty pretensions to
religious authority.

This accidental allusion suggests a few remarks on
another feature of the expose of Miss Reed. The
most fertile source of moral evil is indolence, espe-
cially when it becomes systematic and secluded. It
is on this account that great examples of vice as well
as virtue are not so proauctive of imitation as might
at first be expected. The &ct ia, there are hundreds
that want ener^^, for one that wants ambition, and
sloth has in this respect prevented vice in some minds
as well as virtue in others. Idleness is the grand
|)adfioocsan of life, andin that stagnant abyss the most

134

SUPPLSmilT TO

Mdnttrj ihlngi often produce no good, and the most
ttozioiie no evil. Abetract vloe, howerer, may be and
often ii, engendered in idleness ; thongh the moment
it beoomei eiBoient it must auit its oradle and cease to
be idle. In monasteriea ana oonyents, therefore, all
who admit onr nature to be radically oorrupt will ez-
peet to find the seeds and roots of evil to abound^to
be feeble in their strei^^ owing to a restricted mode
of lifb, and the want ox spaoe for expansion and ex-
ercise— still to abound in luxurianoe and variety.

Amidst this evil of monastic seclusion, there is no
substantial good to compensate or counteract it. Ad-
mitting it to have some salutary influence on those
who submit to it, *'not b^ constraint but willingly,
not for Ulthy Inore, but with a ready mind," that in-
fluence reaches not beyond a verv narrow circle.
There are undoubtedly some to be found in all ages
and in most countries, who have experienced all the
calm delight and satisfiEtction they expected and pro-
fessed—whose feelings have been raised and sept
above the world by perseverance in strict and solemn
devotion— who have ** sat in heavenly places/' and
have partaken of emotions and eigoyments beyond
the power of language to describe. All this is possi-
ble, and by no means improbable.

But how narrow has been its widest range, and
bow insignificant its greatest influence on society!
Private and sednded devotion is of infinite value as
the main spring, the moving cause, of an active piety
and a wide spreading beneficence : but such piety us
this — never coming forth into public action, and
scarcely known by the mass of mankind to exist— is
as restricted in its social infiuence, as it is productive
of personal superstition, and surrounded and sustain-
ed 17 local corruption. Were this piety in itself as
nndefiled as its names and pretensions would imply-
were it always the vestal inviolable devotion which it

SIX MONTHS IN ▲ CONTENT.

126

tMnmes to be— were it holy m the fires of heaTen.
whence alone it professes to be inspired and inflamed
—its limited and oonoealed oharaoter would not be
nicely weighed against it: but its evil aooompani-
mento, so generally attending it as to prove almost
essenuid to its existenoe, will always prevent its being
held in venr high repntation, and render an immense
majorihr of the wise and good as averse to encourage
it m omers as to adopt it themselves. As in agriom-
ture, he Uiat can prodnoe the greatest crop for him-
self is not the best fiirmer, but he that can render his
crop the best at the least expense ; so in the Christian
churdh, they are not the most valuable members who
can acquire for themselves the greatest good, but
those wno can accomplish this with the least admix-
ture of concomitant ill. For let none presume to
think that they can devise any i>lan of produoing good
nnalloyed and unadulterated with evil. This Is the
prerogative of God alone.

Apart Arom the m'^^i «vils, more or less corruptlBg
the best religion of convents, there are ridiculous cus-
toms and ceremonies which, to say the least, debase
that religion, and tend, in the view of young converts
to the system, to make it appear a jieneot caricature
of that subl^e realibr which the scriptures render it.
One of the pupils ox the Boston convent thus des-
cribee its discipline in which Miss Reed's previous
account is perfectly borne out. *< The usual punish-
ments of the school were making a young lady sit on
the top of a high pyramid, or flight of steps, in a con-
spicuous place; putting their feet in the stocks, and
kissing the floor. All these punishments I have seen
in the sohooL The kissing the floor I particularly
remember seeing in three cases. One case was my
little sister, whose fault, I believe was mukinij^ up a
face to a young lady. She was ordered to kiss the
floor, and complied. Another was a nieoe of one ol

126

•UPPLBMBNT TO

the teaoheni, ft Catholic; and the third a little Pro-
teatant girl about six years old. These pimi^hments
were iimicted in the presence of all the school.
Kissing the floor was considered to be one of the
punishments to mortiiy those who had broken the
rules."

One or two remarks on this quotation. It is ac-
knowledged that such was the discipline of thb con-
yent iCMoU. It is, however, manirost that, so far as
was practicable, it was the discipline of the entire
conyent. Its early exercise on the youngest scholars,
Protestant as well as Catholic, was evidently intend-
ed to preiMtre them, in the event of their re-entering
or remaining in the convent as religi$U8$a, for sub-
mission either to the same rules, or to rules still
more ridiculous and severe. A second remark sug-
gested by the quotation regards the powerftil hdd
which, with all its known evils, the system most
have held of the good opinion of surrounding parents.
Tlds young lady acknowledges that she " went there
with nluotanoe, because her elder sister, who had been
a pupil fto a long time, had left it several times, and
came home much dissatisfied ; but her friends persua-
ded her to return !" Yet, amidst this dissatisjE&ction
and these escapes of an elder daughter, and the con-
sequent and natural reluctance of a second daughter
to enter the forbidding place, not only did the latter
enter and continue there tmfee months longer than
Miss Reed, but a younger sister also was sent to kiss
the floor, in token of her subjection to a scholastic
plan, as absurdly retdundant in punishments, as it
was glaringly deficient in imparting sound tuition in
letters, monds, or piety. Such was the in&tuation
of parents in favour of the convent that their chil-
dren were thus successively foroBd mto it, and com-
pelled to remain, notwithstanding they themselves
were forbidden to witness the manner in which they

pareni

letter

of the

their

reachcl

"itwl

not

that

and

perso^

with

shoull

nX MONTHS IN A OONYENT.

127

ittle Pro-
li^hments
e icliool.
ne of the
Token the

It is ac-
f th6 con-
;, 80 fieir as
the entire
st scholars,
kly intend-
re-entering
9, for suh-
I rules still
»mark sag-
Rrerful hold
rstem must
ing parents.
' went there
ho had been

times, and
mdspersua-
Bsatis&ction
nd the con-
id daughter
d the latter
longer than
I sent to kiss
a scholastic
ments, as it
id tuition in
) infEituation
kt their chil-
it, and com-
y themselves
I which they

are treateil. Thus stands the record of the same
young lady. t^

" The whole time I was in the convent I never
saw my friends any where except in the visiting par-
lour, which was separate from, the school-room and
from the community of nuns. No visitors on any
occasion were allowed to go into the school-room.
My sister and another lady once called expressly to
see the school-room, bnt they were refused. The
only persons I ever saw in the school-room, except
the pupils, were the Superior and nuns, the Bishop
frequently, two priests, Dr. OTlaherty and Mr.
Tyler, and I think our other priest whose name I do
not recollect. The school-room was sufficiently large
to accommodate a number of visitors. The ^oung
ladies all knew that they could not invite their pa-
rents into the school-room on any occasion. I never
knew any of the parents to visit either the sleeping-
rooms or the dining^hall."

Nor is this all. There can be little doubt, not only
that letters from their parents sometimes never reach-
ed the pupilS) but that letters from the pupils were in
greater numbers withheld ftY>m the parents. It was
a rule of the convent for every pupil to write to her
parents in the middle of every month ; but as each
letter thus written was placed unsealed in the hands
of the Superior, much uncertainty prevailed about
their being despatched, and no small number never
reached their destination. This young lady remarks,
" it was against the rule to receive a lettter which did
not come through the Superior. It was understood
that all letters addressed to the pupils were opened
and read by the Superior, before they reached the
persons to whom they were addressed. It rested
with the superior whether any letters we had written
should reaon our fHends or not"

We find it time to bring these desultory, yet we

128

nz UONTHS in ▲ OONVBNT.

hope appropriate and aeaionable reflections to a close.
Their object has been to preserve the reader, espeoi'
ally the young reader, from those errors of the d^y
wmoh are most likely to " corrupt them from the
simplicity that is in Cbrist." If those alone who, by
connteniuicing and scattering these corruptions, **8ow
to the wind, reaped the whirlwind," our resret wouIg
not be so great, nor our anxiety for the rismg youth
of the hmd so int^ise. But toe mischief is, that the
blindness of bigotry seeks its victims chiefly amidsi
the innocent and unoffending. The cottage is sure
to suffer for every error of the church, when cor-
ruption occupies the seat of authority, whether eccle-
siastical or poUti^l, and proceeds from sources to
which the voung are taught in their earliest lessons
to look with respect, it may be compared to that tor-
rent which origmates in the mountain, but commits
its devastations in tho vale. One importuit rule
should perpetually govern us— to bring every thing,
antiquity as well as novelty, to the light of reveal^
truth. Idystery m^a^ifies danger; as the fog does
the sun. The hand that unnerved Belehazzar derived
its most horrifvin^ influence firom the want of a body ;
and death fmu is not so formidable in what we know
of it as in what we know not Had Miss Beed un-
derstood these things in early life^ she had never en-
tered the XJrsuline Convent.

•>.<%

45 "^<iji^^^^i?^
X

to a close-
3r, espeoi'
)f the d^y
i from the
ne who, by
ions, "sow

)^tW01llG

sing youtb
LB, that the
efly amidsi
Age is sure
when cor-
elher eccle-
I BouTces to
iest lessons
to that tor-
tut commits
)ortant rule
jvery thing,
, of revealed
Oie fog does
izzar derived
nt of a body;
hat we know
8B Beed un-
ad never en-

■ \: