.^^ '^T^^^^ IMAGE EVALUATION TEST TARGET (MT-3) // ^/ C/j {/. 1.0 I.I 1.25 1.4 IIIIIM m M 1.6 V] O^ CIHM/ICMH Microfiche Series. CIHM/ICMH Collection de microfiches. M Canadian Institute for Historical Microreproductions Institut Canadian de microreproductions historiques 1980 Technical Notes / Notes techniques The Institute has attempted to obtain the best original copy available for filming. Physical features of this copy which may alter any of the images in the reproduction are checked below. D D Coloured covers/ Couvertures de couleur Coloured maps/ Cartes gdographiques en couleur L'Institut a microfilm^ le meilleur exemplaire qu'il lui a 6t6 possible de se procurer. Certains ddfauts susceptibles de nuire A la quality de la reproduction sont not6s ci-dessous. D D Coloured pages/ Pages de couleur Coloured plates/ Planches en couleur Th po of filr Th CO( or api Th( filr ins Pages discoloured, stained or foxed/ Pages dicolordes, tachetdes ou piqudes Tight binding (may cause shadows or distortion along interior margin)/ Reliure serrd (peut causer de I'ombre ou de la distortion le long de la marge intdrieure) D Show through/ Transparence Pages damaged/ Pages endommag^es IVIa in ( upi bol foil n Additional comments/ Commentaires suppldmentaires Bibliographic Notes / Notes bibliographiques D D Only edition available/ Seule Edition disponible Bound with other material/ Reli6 avec d'autres documents n Pagination incorrect/ Erreurs de pagination Pages missing/ Des pages manquent D Cover title missing/ Le titre de couverture manque D Maps missing/ Des cartes gdographiques manquent D Plates missing/ Des planches manquent D Additional comments/ Commeniaires suppl6mentaires The images appearing here are the best quality possible considering the condition and legibility of the origirfal copy and in keeping with the filming contract specifications. Les images suivantes ont 6t6 reproduites avec le plus grand soin, compte tenu de la condition et de la nettetd de I'exemplaire film6, et en conformity avec les conditions du contrat de filmage. The last recorded frame on each microfiche shall contain the symbol —►(meaning CONTINUED"), or the symbol V (meaning "END"), whichever applies. Un des symboles suivants apparaTtra sur la der- nidre image de cheque microfiche, selon le cas: le symbole — ► signifie "A SUIVRE", le symbole V signifie "FIN". The original copy was borrowed from, and filmed with, the kind consent of the following institution: National Library of Canada L'exemplaire filmd fut reproduit grdce & la g6n6rosit6 de l'6tablissement prdteur suivant : BibliothAque nationale du Canada Maps or plates too large to be entirely included in one exposure are filmed beginning in the upper iRft hand corner, left to right and top to bottom, as many frames as required. The following diagrams illustrate the method: Les cartes ou les planches trop grandes pour dtre reproduites en un seul clich6 sont filmdes d partir de I'angle supdrieure geiuche, de gauche it droite et de haut en bas, en prenant le nombre d'images ndcessaire. Le diagramme suivant illustre la mdthode : 1 2 3 1 a i 4 5 6 UN GR ■"■-•- ^i^ THE UNSPECIFIC SCANDAL An Original, Political, Critical and Grittical Extravaganza, PBRFORMED AT TUB GHKAT DOMINION THEATRE, OTTAWA, $.** ttje ^*u9 of gPuce, 18'^ri. .jr=:*ry3^:-_ OTTAWA: I'HfNTKU BY A. 8. WOODBURN, ELGIN STRKIT, 1874,. f-*»M(<^^- uiW^R h < , , , ' I . t -V Re()htered uccordimj to the Copyright Act of 1868. ■i M i\ \ • ' ' ■ I i ; I I ',•',■( if' II i TllK U.N SPECIFIC SCANDAL ACT J. ScKNK I. A newspaper office — In the middle a cauldron boilini^ — Thunder and Lightning — Enter three Etlitoi-8 as Wizards — They circle r in scraps of paper. ound the caiildr the constitutional question, And hold himself upon the first occasion iieady to give us a superb oration. To all the others I can only say Make yourselves useful in a general way And recollect in all your little schemes This maxim " The end justifies the means. " But wait a moment, I'll not keep you long, Before you go I'd like to sing a song Sinys- Grits Wha IIae." 1 Grits wha nao wi' George Brown bled, Grits wham ]]lake has afton lodj Welcome to the downy bod Of the Ministry. 6 2. IHow'h the day and now's the hour Sees the front o' battle lour, Sees the full of John A's. power And office sweet for in «". 3. Wha do loaves and fishes crave ? Wlia snu^ sinecures would have ? And don't object to be a slave Let him follow me. 4. Wha will turn and twist the law Anyhow, sao it will draw Us to power and make them fa' Let him on wi' me. 5. Thou/;;h the tools Ave use arc vile, And their touch must needs defile, At such scruj)les we but smile So to power come we. 6. La}' the false usurpers low, Never mind how foul the blow, When we're in then wo will show ' llow to make it pay. C horns of Grits — NYe're off by the morning train ' Our own sweet homes to gain. And trust It won't bo very long Before we're back again. For wo are so fond of travel when the country has to pay When the country has to pay When the country has to pay And wo love to draw ten cents a mile, and dollars ton per (Imv. (^Exeunt in various directions.) Scene IIL The Premier's Office in Ottawa. ■folui A. (soliloquiziny), Tnis is enough a fellow's heart to break ! A pretty state of things and no mistake. TIjoi'c'h tliat Committee which wo so much trufstcil Would turn out trumps, has been and ^one and futntml : And all those tele<^ramM and letters too Which 1 was fool enough to write Sir Hugh, — I little thought when 1 so much imperilled, They would be prigged and published in the I/ernfd,— It is a n»ost disgusting sort of go, r never dreamed Sir I/nyh would use mo so And how from this scrape I'm to get out clear I'm sure I've not the most remote idea. J can't deny it, that would bo too cheeky, Besides there's no mistake / had (he specie, And that's ii fact which enemies y^tr-nitious Will make a handle for attacks most vicious. Of course Sir Hugh had no corrupt intention, His loans were just a delicate attention ; He felt 'twas for the good cT the Dominion We should remain in power, and this opinion Was shared by me, so I saw no objections To take his funds to carry our elections. t know this seems a rathei* slender fiction Considering the amount of his subscription ; ihit anyhow we'll have to make it do. And perhaps by luck we'll manage to pull through Meanwhile upon mature consideration T think we'd best go in for prorogation ! SuiHj hy the Premier — " PROROQATrON.*' Tune — " I want money." Prorogation, Prorogation, That's the dodge for the situation ; , , It will cause the Grits vexation And save ourselves gi-eat botheration. When in the house I take mv station I know I shall meet much objurgation ; Blake will make a fierce oration And hold mo up to detestation. I rather dread an appeal to the nation In its present state of fermentation So I think upon consideration I'd better go in for prorogation. Prorogation, Prorogation, &c. ACT II. ScKNK I. lIouHo of Commons — Tlio Sj)oalvor in tlio CImir. Aiioniidir risos and addrenHos tlio house in a Htalo of ^iv!(t indignation. TIk! nioanost thin;;' in hi.story, this I call, Tliat slippery I'l-cmior h ^oin^j," to soil us all. lloi'tVs Blake and 1 burstin/^ with indignation And we've checknialod 'ly tlds pioro^ation j \Vc don't intend to stand it. that's a fact, And on this motion call on you to act. 1 stand hero representing a constituency And beg to «ay — Sf/i.aker — A message from his KxceUency. Alexander — No messenger shall interrupt me here — This is a breach of privilege 'tis cleai' — I stand here representing the opinion Of IX large number throughout this Dominiou ; To express my sentiments is my intent My injured feelings must and will have vent, 1 say that this projected prorogation Is of our privilege an usurpation, And I demand that here upon this floor We call upon — Snri/eau t-al-A rms — The Black Hod's at tho door Alexander — Black' E(«l be blowed ! I solemnly declare I'll not— (Speaker and Ministers leave the Chamber.) Hallo ! the Speaker's left tho Chair, My friends, I'm in a state of such disgust With indignation I feel fit to bust. As things have takcm this unpleasant turn To the Committee room we'd best adjotirn, And there discnss the proper mode of action To meet this very scandalous transaction. Choi'us of Oppositionists — Prorogation, prorogation Has caused us all great consternation ; 'Tis of our rights an ursupation And fills us all with indignation. 9 Wc will send a dopiitntion To prcHont our protestation And malvc a 8tron>,. (Log.)— For very near an hour you've kept mo waiting. While in the other chamber you've been prating; And even now 1 much regret to find The opposition has remained behind. To keep me here from such suspense a sutlerin' — As though I were a duffer, not a Dufferin — is a proceeding wliich lias caused mo pain, And 1 expect 'twill not occur again. Now you are liero I haven't much to say Kxcept to mention in a casual way That certain charges of a nature grave Against my chief advisers have been made ; And as the Committee you yourselves appointed Has your anticipations dls appointed, r have judged best, considering the position, To give instructions for a lloyal Commission. If this don't suit I see no other plan Than let you fight it out as best you can, Trusting your diiferencc after due debate Like the Kilkenny cats may terminate, The well remembered issue of whoso quarrel Left scarce tu (i) le to point the moral. Soinj ■' Cock a doodle doo," by his Excellency. Cock a Doodle Doo. A few remarks I'd like to make Before I leave you now. And just express ray sentiments About this precious row. The house is in an uproar And you make a grout a do ; But after all it's nothing more Than Cock a doodle doo ! i'knrns of Senators — Cock a doodle, cock a iloodle, cock a doodle doo. You say this prorogation is Of privilege a breach, 10 And very kindly undertake My duties me to teach. Well, talk away, it don't hurt rao And doubtless pleases you ; But I'm quite aware it's nothing more Than Cock a doodle doo. C'/iorua — Co(;k a doodle, cock a doodle, cook u doodle doo. My Ministers have me assured The charges are not true. That they've the country's benefit At heart, in all they do. Sir John the matter has explained And very glibly too ; But 1 fancy much of what he says Is Cock a doodle doo. Chorus — Cock a doodle, cock a doodle, cock a doodle doo. But anyhow pray rest assured • However things turn out, That I shall kec]) myself aloof From party strife and rout. ' I'll not myself identify With either him or j'ou. But listen calmly to your cries Of Cock a doodle doo. Chorus — Cock u doodle, cock a doodle, cock a doodle doo. (A prolonged croto from Black Rod.) Vi ' ACT HI. Scene I. Ottawa — The day befbre the Session— A meeting of Grits — Alexander in the chair. Song and chorus. Air. — " Siap Bang." Alexander (sings) — Since last we met, have strange ovonts Occurred, as you're aware, On which 'tis my intention to Address 3'^ou from this chair. Our prospects now look brighter than They ever did before, 11 Jlo doo. die doo. And there's no doubt wo soon slmll ehan.i>x* Our places on the floor. And I feel so very jolly oh ! So jolly oh, so jolly oh ! I feel so very jolly oh, With thoughts of coming power. Chomjs — Slaj) bang, hero we are again. Here we are again, hero we are again, Slap bang ! here we are again, Such jolly Grits are we. .ilfxoHilfn- — We've managed by our little schemes To raise a mighty fuss, And 1 fancy that the Ministers Are in a precious muss. 'Tis true the charge which first we made Has rather proved a sell, But matters which have leaked out since Will suit us quite as well. And we ought to feel quite jolly oh ! Quite jolly oh ! quite jolly oh ! We ought to feel quite jolly oh, At having such good luck. Cha I'flS- here we are again, )dlc doo. /!/. t'MIIK ■ler A mectinir Slap bang Here we are again, here we are again, Slap bang ! heie we are again, Such downy Grits are we. {loq.) — My friends. The proposition I shall make to-might, Will probably surprise on all excite ; But though of itiquette it no doubt a breach 'Twill save us listening to prosy speeches. So I propose that each of this great tliron* His views and sentiments express in song And first, with your approval, I shall call Upon the member for West Montreal. (Cries of hear, hear.) Song — The Jolly Flour Inspector. .1?V— " The Young Man From the Country." I'm a jolly Flour Inspector, To Montreal I came, The twenty-foot channel for to find. And win myself great fame. IS \ I 12 I'm a public boiief'actor, toa, As you may plainly seo. .S'/ii)/ie>i — And all the ^rcat improvements during ihc |)as( twenty yeans, which have made Montreal what it is to-day, why They've all been tlone by mc. I'm a jolly Flour Inspector And they've all been done by mc. Xow there's Victoria's famous bridge, Which spans our stream so fair, Why if it hadn't been for mo It never would have been there. I didn't exactly build it myself, But I made the suggestion, you sec- SpukcH. — And therefore I maintain that I am entitled l(* quite as niuch credit as the man who designed it- or the poopli- who paid for it. In fact, I may fairly say that It's all been done b}' me. I'm a jolly Flour Inspector, And it's all been done by mc. When first to Montreal I came The city was quite small, And as for manufactures There was next to none at alL I felt we were designed by fate An emporium grand to bo, ,ij>o/^en — And I said as much to many of my friends a/id acquaintances, and surely on the strength of that I may fairly claim that It's all been done by mo. I'm a jolly Flour Inspector, And it's all been done by me. In fact, there's scarcely anything, So far as I can see. That, if the matter's sifted close, Has not been done b}^ me. And I've yet one more accomplishment, Which had bettor mentioned be, I'm a (hib at fitidwg letters, too, Which don't belong to me. I'm a jolly Flour Inspector, And John A's. boon done by me. 13 Ahumnder. — VVo'ro much obliged, and jLcrntiticd i'lii j^urc. McmlnM- for Sheftbrd next will take the floor. Song. — Annexation. Air. — " Yankee Doodle." Annexation, people say, A sentiment of mine is, And though my body's here, my heart The other side the line is. Well I'm quite prepared to say, Though it cause vexation, That I. think our destiny i Must be Annexation. Oh ! Yankee doodle doo, Yankee doodle dandy, Canada you're bound to take, For it lies so handy. Independence is a flam Won't "T examination, We've not material to make An independent nation. 80 why not let us join at once The great American nation, And perhaps I may be President When we got Annexation. Oh ! Yankee doodle doo, Yankee doodle dandy. Walk in quick and chaw us up, For we He so handy. Ale.>'(i/t/.s ) If 3'ou'll only listen to me. I've got my points all cut and dried when this debate comes on, And it's all arranged that I shall follow close upon Sir John ; And after he has said his say, and Teddy Blake gets up. Just bet your boots you'll see Sir John completely gobbled up. For Logical Teddy is my name, &c. Akxaiider. — Although I've known our brilliant friend so Ion I never thought he sang so good a song ; At all he undertakes ho seems a bright un'. In fact he's quite an '' Admirable Crichton ;" But as it's getting late, I'll call upon Our mutual frienis, Holton and Dorion. Duet. — Messrs. IIolton and Dorion. Air. — "Write me a letter from home." Holton. — Two jolly members are wo — I'm Holton and he Dorion, And we're waiting John Young to advise Eespecting this note from Sir John. Dorion. — Publish the letter of course, Not to do 80 would surely be wrong, 'Twould be sinful to lose such a chance, So we'll publish your letter, Sir John. t-^i 15 he (xi'its, icr fits ; uits, boots. boyn, (bis) ro I)ark. prepared, ..is scared. boys, (hiW) e comes on, ir John ; obhled u}.). nd so lon^, It un'. :;hton ;" an. ISO 3, Ilnlton. — 'Tis true it is not meant for us, And to read private lottei's is wron^ ; But perhaps Pope has sent it himself. So we'll publish your letter, Sir John. DorUm. — The letter is sent by " a friend," And discloses a groat public wrong ; So no one can say it's not right To publish your letter, Sir John, C'honis.— Publish the letter of course, Why should we hesitate long ; Such a chance we shall ne'er get again, So we'll publish your letter, Sir John. Alexander, enthusiasticalli/. — Of harmony like this I never tire, And scarcely know whether I most admire The sentiment or music ; but I think, Considering that wo pay for our own drink. And that it's getting late, that it wore best To break up now and seek our natural rest. Tou know that those to bed who early go. Healthier, wealthier, and wiser daily grow ; Wisdom, of course, we none of us require. But health and wealth I think we all desire. Therefore, with this becoming end in view, To all of you I now will say adieu. (Exeunt all, singing " There's a good time coming."') Scene EI. A Chamber in the Parliament Buildings — Time. Middle of the Session — The Premier, in a very discon- solate attitude, seated in a chair with his head on his hand. Melancholy music — He sings dolefully. Song.— Air, "Sara Hall." My name it is John A., Premi(?er, Premie«r, My name it is John A., Premiesr. My name it is John A., and mournfully I say, That 1 do not see my way Out of this, Mackenzie he will come, He will come, he will come ; 16 Miukenzie he will come, BIcHs (?) his eyes ! And Blake ho will come too, and all tho ctissed And I don't know what to do, [crew, i^Tt'oiiibone accony)a7iiment.) Bless (?) their eyes ! (^Weej)s iwisi/i/.) (Enter a number of Ministers who console their chief.) Sir Francis. — Cheer up respected chief, don't pipe your eye : I know it's very hard, but pray don't cry. See all your faithful followers muster thick Around you, quite prepared by you to sticlc. Though you are licked you did the heat you con !< I And over your misfortune should not brood. Just look at me, a j)olitician old After so many years out in the cold. Yet sec how stiff an upper lip 7 keep ; You never hear vie whine, or see me weep. Losses we must exjiect as well as winnings. And you have had a pretty lengthy innings ; And even now e'er many months ela2)sc Our party may be in again perhaps. ( Sir John shakes his head doubtitigly.) Pooh ! Pooh ! I thought you made of tougher stuff ! See here, I'll sing a song to cheer you up. i