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LAST REHEARSAL FOU T|M PAnaUfBIftlk TOUIt op THH ROSS MINSTRELS Positively the Last Appearance in Ontario of the Oraatett Asgregation of Talent ever Combined under One Management ADVAnCH AGBHT ALEXANDER SMITH iMSTait op eniaiioims GEORGE WASHINGTON ROSS Assisted by th« Gpsatsst Uivins ■ad P«n fleat on Bavtb JOHNNIE DRYDEN JIMMIE STRAHON SEE THE ARRAY OF TALENT ! 1 1 7 AXE CRINDER8 7 7 MACHINE HUCCBR8 7 7 JUGGLERS 7 7 LOO ROLLERS 7 7 BALLOT BURNERS 7 7 SURPLUS MELTER8 7 7 THIMBLE RIGGERS 7 40 ARTISTS 40 At each performance Professor Ross will perform his in imitable self-swallowing act, to slow Referendum Music by the Company THE ADVANCE AGENT •Y THB WHObB eOfflPJIIIY / THi; I'ATHIOT'S FAUKVVELL. 'I'lif.v re guiug now to plant us, No iiioro we'll spend the taxes; They say they lio not want us To grind our little axes. Of ofticc we're not weary; Hut yet we re getting leary. They're going now to plant us, And — w e must g o. We're going out o' bunnesa, We're going out o' buriness; We're going where the chilly winH bum to plant u«; Kiad people lio aot Unit ua, We're noiag when tt» ehilfar winds do btow. W« eu hMr th« biOloto MUn§— Th« other ehapa a ealliag Wall ao«a ba ng for? Pkok. Koss— \Vt' 'vf not 'to sing mmicthing new, Jimmie, or I greatly fear (•ur powi'r IN Kline. K.NU Man SrHAno.N— C'heer up, Profeaaor, our powar'a all right. I'ROF. Ross — Aye man, nuc iloot it is. |piit we cHniia' use your power. End Max Dryosn — How many horse-powt f have you got down at Peter- boro, Jimt Knd Man Strattok — ^You mean cow power out in Dakota, Johnnie. Psor. Boss— Nae personal aUuaiona, lada, steer clear o' that kind o' talk. (Applause from the Minatrela.) End Man Dryden — Say, Professor, kin you tell me why dc elcetora of Xorf Toronto are like old pagan Roman pcraecutoraf Psor. Ross— Na, Johnnie, I can aee nae reaemblame. Why ia itt End Man Dryden— Because they'll kill a Marter, aah! (Yah, yah, yah, from the minstrels.) End Man stua'ltun — Say, I'roffssor, kin you tell me, kin yout FBor. Bosti— Can 1 tell ye wbatt Kno Mak 8ti;m kin— Kin yo twU m* why dv *-lwti'r» ot P'M»f l>n»:iri., nt.^ H llox iif rod 111 rrin '? l'i!OK. lidss— I Kif ii iifi, .liiiiiiii''. Why? Km. Man Stua tI" l'.. . :ni-ii ^L. 're l>r>.|r'i . in' I. I.i.ii.l .i|.>>li.ii*- titim till' tllillHtrt ls SUM • . I J*iU)K. Koss- .N'f '. r i ili< ii l it jiikiH, .Icihiiiiif. ux ;i mi.^j .Mm. ^ TlIK FAUMIN' MAN. ! (mrv took .1 iri]. rroiii Dii-ta-ri-n Aii'l inuj.!.- ki.-k.i! liki — wrll "Pwas Iciv. f. v tl attle that iiuuIh me go To :i Ix t'ti r liiii l tlinii ()ii-ta-ri-o ; 'Twiis thns tliiit I slipjM il and fell. I'm !i f.Trnifv ^i.i..!, „.•< _.i>u all '\'< Kuip>.. And 1 think it little harm To feather mv ne»i nhih' my hrrds ili> jth'W In a bott«r hin.l than t)n-ta-ri o When winter driv.-'B tl'.f sturm. For the days will 1"' < "1'1 ''t tlir i n. I ..I May And i-liilly for rmri' tliiin mo: If SIratton'iio'i tl iiiks !u < :-u ' . I'l liis -way. .?\ist liocau-o lii^ v'.:it. v r ■'•ill |>ay : Lot him -ti' U hi' 'li-"i -6- I ihow bow to dram and bntter to bring, And I We lold aome eggs for cash. I snap my fingers and swear, by jin^, That 1 'li join atrain with a Yankee ring, Though Ontario goes to ^ash. VwxHf. Boss— Xoo, Dryden, lad that'll no' dae. I'll admit that ye ha« the real leebral priuLiple.s, au' your patriotism's o' a real leebral kind, but ye should n:i' sjeak stic piaiis. Cr.r.i:ic 'r. the v. or J. Yc'll hae to cut that last verse out, for, hs the ^uid book buys (lhoii;:li the text is nae iu my version) ne must l>o wise as doves an' as harmless r- ponts till after the 29th. After that ye may sing onything ye like, but I misdoot some o' us will feel mair like sidiin' than singin'. Oibson, man, ye 're the held o' the morality department oMho MiBlatry, gie ua an edifyin' aaag aboot how we deal with viildatn. Smro BT Paw. OnaoK— Oh I'm a poUeemaB bold. Don't joa kaow. And I do aa I am told. bon 't 70a knew. If a Tory plug a vote, 1 will make of it a note And I '11 take him by the throaf Doa't yv ksow. If a Grit ahould "lead" his thumb, Don't you know. I H be deaf and also dumb, Don 't you know. If tbo party make a slip And the ballot box should tip. Then — my finger's on my lip, Don't you know. I'&or. Ross — That'll dae, Gibson. Its true leebral principle nae doot, but it's put raitber plain. Ye should he mair Tnet:iplH-esiciil. I'm sure yeH no •ay ye ever kent or beard tell o' any leebrals daein' ony "slipidn'." pKor. (X^soN Certainly not, iioiliiny of the kind ever came under my «oUco. 1 11 leave it to Smith. Eh, Smilli? AnvANCK Ar.F.NT Smihi— Xo, sir. You novir saw anything suspicious in West Klgin or elsewhere. Your back was tnrnr.l. 1 never saw anything' either. 1 never knew of a single ease. I never saw I'riteliett, nor Lewis, nor Bole, nor O'Ooraan, nor Vance, or nny of those fello\vs in my life. I don't believe ♦here are any such persons. I never spoke to Pritchett ; the last time he wanted —7— ^ money I told hue he ought to be ashamed of himself, and so be ought. Whea I pay a man I expect him to do his work and if he gets caught not to equeaJ and give us away. No, sir, I can say "cross my heart" and "hope 1 may die" if I ever knew of any crooked work (except what was justified by party BMessity). In fact I never kuew anything and don't now. PiiOK. Koss— There, there, that'll dae, Alec, uaebody wad accuse ye o' kennin onytbing, an' ye needua speak sae emphatic, man; ye 're no gcin evi- dence afore the West Elgin Commission, lint 1 see the Ulobe is represented here the night, can ye no gie us a sang, Kowellf C6me, tune up, moa, w' dinna be bashfuL Ye 're ne'er blate when ye 're askin' for things. SONO BT DiUCTOB BOWILL— THE POLITICAL ROBIN-SOJS. I 'm monarch of all I surrey, Oh law pleading where is the priia My right there is none to dispnta; Pettyfoggers have seen in the jobt On the iMipegon river and bay Better into good pulp to the tju, I am boM of tha atoff— it'a a bate. Than citing old eaasa, bagok Paor. Bosa— That's the true riag^ Bowaii, nam. Noo lak oa aiag « tt» gathar abont oor policy in geaeraL OBoaua ST fBB Onaun— ' MAKE HAT WHILE THE SUN SHINSa Let aa gather up the timber in the New Oatario. Lat na not fcngat tha pulp wood— that belon^^ to Orita^ 70a kaov. Lat OS t^ our ahara of comfort in the bleanngs that we get, Tttut tha day ia auidx coming when we'll sordy need them yat. Then gathar up the timber. Then gather up the timber. Then gather up the timber. For tha chilly by-aad-bya. Let ns collar all the pulp wood thai will sell for ready cash, Laaving just the rocks and brushwood for the dirty farmer trash. Let us — • PiiOF. Iloss — Let us stop, lads, stop. This is but a rehearsal, tae be sure, an' there's iiae harm wliere wo'r.i a' I'ripnds, but oot in the country a sang like that waudna' dae. Gin tlio tairnieis ilcacrt us what's our latef PiiOF. Davis — Well, Professor, wliat else is left to the farmer in New Ontario t , , , pi;oK. Ross— l{ij::ht, Davis, lad. Ye did yon job like a real new lecbral, but wo mustna' adver'izc it. Let us consider where we're at. Tac bo or no' tae be. That's the question. Or in ither words. Malice aye an' Mabee no. I'm thinkin' no', lie spoilt us. We'll hae tae mak' a big push to win, Tha contractors an' ithera we hae "built up" are wi us tae a man; sae are tha book publishinj; bodies, an' wi' good reason, we hae "uuilt" them up an' may fairly expcc' them tao come down handsomely. There's funds enough, bat I'm •a feelia' very eheerfu' for a' that. , ^MMP. Davib— Wltat mora do we want than mon^ and tha anppoit of tka aaipotatioaat — 8— PiicK. Ross— Man Eliliu, vp maun ha.- had the heid as weU U tke hid« tanned. want votes man, votes. Whether they're cast for «• or "M*^ eoonted tor us is no sac particular, bat votes we maun hae, an 'jpn the an' the workinmen bodies leave us we're lost, an' I wadna' gie th« «ineU o a burnt hallot lor our chances if ye sing san^s Uke that. What daoje think, Ma^er? We ave had a deal o' respec' for your opeen^n an' t^uik n«r o-t noo since ye've became, as it were, a brand tnatdied from the bnming'. Te muct aing ui a eang. BT MB. THE BONO OF THE NEWEST BECRUIT. The way I got my title's by a habit I have got Of getting cheaply in the game while others pay the shot I tried to work my party, to play my little game. But Whitney wouldn 't stand it, so to the (ints 1 came. I've made my peaoe with Gibson, ;\iid a little deal with Row, 80, Grits of North Toronto, in me behi.ld youf buss. I'U work the "temperance" raeket :i d the "independent iai% And if your machine's in order we'll make tbr Tones quake. Ground Floor Gnitter is my name. Ground Floor (iiMt. r is my name. Who's the man that turned bin coat, And has the gall to ask your vote! Ground Floor Grai'ter is hie name. t Pior. Boss— Wed done, Matter. The candor an' frankness is maist better ttea the nunc. Noo we'U hear fiae the eweet singer o' New OnUrio. Come, tnae upi, Coomee> am' pit Shake^eare tae riiame. SOMO BY JlMHIE CONMH THE TKIUMI'H OF SCRAP. Ob, the only song I siug whou my must- is on the winj; Is the one that makos us ready for the tray. Oh the trusts to ua belong for wo helpeJ them to be strong. And they'll help ua in return when comes the day. Scrap, scrap, scrap, asaesament's easy For the ganijs who see us through. If a town should want a phut They will quickly find they can't Till they buy the private corporation, too. (Wild cheers from the company.) Prof. Ross— Canny, lads, canny. Conmce ye 're a great poet an a great singer, but ye hae a ba.l habit o' buiu' ower eamlid. Ve speak the tnith, man, an' its a dangerous habit tae get intae for a man o' your age, an fatal tae your chances o' poleeticul promotion. 1 canna' help reflectin' what might hae been the consequence if I, myself, hadna' broken off ttie haWt in early life. I certainly never wad hae attained tae my presrat high potftioii. 1 wad im- prees upon ye a' that while a man may admire trutii in the abatract, as 1 -; Koss and Uareourt and Boss. Who eun conjure an asset oat of a debt? Why, Koss and Uareourt and Boss. Who is it that makes the crops to grow? Why, Koss ;iud Dryuen and Kosa. Who was it discovered On-ta-ri-o 1 Why, Koss and Davis and Koss. Who is it that makes the hens to layt Why, Ivoss and Drydeu aud Koss. Who tells the sun the time o ' day ! Why, Boh and Latchf ord and Bom Who planted the forests of spruce and,piiiwt Why, Koss and Davis aud Koss. Who placed the metals down in the mineat Why, Koss and Davis and Koss. Who was it that put the machine at playt Why, Ross and Gibson and Ross. Who helped the pluggors to get away* Why, BoH and Uibaon and Bom. Who have fed the eleeton on buncombe aad tnMkt Why, Bom and hia outit and Bom. Who is it the people are eager to rauwht Why, Boss, his machine and Boas. PBOf. Bosa— Weel done Willison, ye dae us but simple justice in the main; kot do ye BO' think that some deU's buckie o' a Tory got haud o' jmu muM n th« lirtf 111 call, noo, on Maister Mowat, Prctid«Bt of the Tonmto Leebral , for a sang. 8nio vt President Mowat — THEY WON 'T DO A THING TO ONTABIO. The grafter's foot is on thy shore, On-ta-re-o, On ta-re-o. The ballot switcher's at thy door, On-ta-re-o, On-ta-re-o. Conmee and Kowell and forty more, Gibson and Bmlii'r, thi\v nisli to the fore— An army of heelors to plunder thy store Of pulp wood and timber limits galore, On-tu-re-o, On-ta re-o. gma n PBXSioKira MowA<^— TBUE LIBERALISM. (New l onetjf.) Oh, there's Conmee and there's Mart«r, And there's Stratton— he 's a Ana other clever fdlowa in the deaL How they grab the land and timber / •While their conseiencea, bo limber ^ ^ , Always say they "develop" when they Steal. Oh, it's pulp, pulp, pulp, And it's deal, deal, deal.. And to Bum it all up, It's a steal, steal, steal. PRO* BOB»-Man, man, Mowat, that's awfu'. Can ye no' "n«'"'7«ou oi s ea ^^^^^ tke franchiae. of the people, ot » J'''?"^;;!"^ poUtieal lexicon it coraos to deaUng with I'" l^^"" "^^^^ LI fa e. iSnaintain that the r«;:^^ra1o^:*?;-dX/' and\\m ^rejared to sta.e my poUtieal Ufe upon that iasue. dM ye^BO think je might favor u« wi' » political sangt SkMio vt Mb. Mawib^ ON-TA-W-O, ON TA BI^. The fell uiurper grips thy throat, On-ta-re o, On ta-re-o. He tampen with thy sacred Tote, ne vuuv' 0n-ta-re-o, On-ta-re-o. lie parcels off thy fair domain His power and prestige to retain A»d iMwe thee in his coils again, On-ta-re-o, On-ta-re-o. Oh thou, of provinces the queen, ' On-ta-re-o, Ou ta-re-o. Shake off the bonds of the machine, On-ta-re-o, On ta-re-o. *' Arouse thee from its luring spell; • Beware its dark dssigns and fell, Its coils are as the grip of heU, Oa-ta-re-o, On-ta-re-o. Shake off tto ihMklw of the "bMM" Oi^t»-reH>, Oa-ta-ie^ Aad, to tUi end, "Baswrnbtr Bom," On-U-re-o, iJn-U-fe-o. For sure 'ta ptain as any pike That Grit and Tory, both alike, For boneat goremment should stnke On-ta-re-o, On-ta-re-o. Ontario— old as well as now— Ou-t;i-r(' o, On-ta-re-o. Ontari llou^■^^t. bold and true, On ta-ri' o, On-ta-re-o. Break up the douionizinj; band That, .junketinn, riiles o'er the land; Now thy redemption is at hand, On-ta-re-o, On-ta-re-o. A ttOTernraei»* maintained by fraud, • ' On-ta-re-o, On-ta-re-o. Write o'er its portals ' ' lohabod, ' ' On-ta-re o, On-ta-re-o. What can a people 's wrongH eondone, With justice, truth and honor gone! Ob my Ontario! Och hone! On-ta-re-o, On-ta-re-o. Who ia thia man, G. W. Bo«^ On-ta-re-o, On-ta-re-o. Who aeakk thy deatiny to boss, i On-ta-re-o, On-U-re-o. By balafal trickery and "skiU'' To force thee 'gainst thy sacred will Asd h
M^ Thise honor to consenre and save, Uu-ta-rc o, Un-t*-l<»« He's true and manly tu tbe cure; Ue comes with amplitude ot lore Tby varied interests to ex^'lore, Oa>ta-ro-o, Oa-t«-f»«. With moral turpitude and fraud, Ou ta-re-o, On-ta-ro-o. Tby iranchise they have rudely clawed, On-ta-re-o, On-ta re-o. Uhl province mine, cans't thou iorget, The blooming, baiiot burniug set* Ohl we'U "Kemember Boss, " you boti On-ta-re-o, Oa-ta-r«-o. i'BO*'. Roaa— Noo, Marter, just stop there. 1 can stand nae mair o' that. That's, nae doot, ane of the Midiauitish melotUes yo used to sing afore ye cam Ue ui: and whUe ye were yet in the gall u' Toryism and bunds o' pobtual in- iauity. If ye mm' tae share wi' Strattoa, an' Howell, an' Conmee, an the Uhen in the prSu o' developiu' an' buildin' up, ye maun lewn ithor tunes an' itf" gti Lad% ye might gie us a guid inspirin' sang a'tbegiUMT, iUu^iiiiVtbendf geniue o ' Leebralint as ye understand it ane that'U gOm ST TU COUfAKr— 80HO or THE BUILDEB& Brild up, bttUd up ttc PHrty We call On-ta-n-o. WtH ■bare tbe stuff quite hear^ Ai far aa it will go. Build up with pulp and timber, With water-power ai ' ore. Use np* the New Ontar. Then seek fresh fields for more. Build up the corporations, Tbe Railway Magnates, too. Build up the school book riagster^ There's a dice for me and yoa. Pro*' Ross— Xa', na', lads, that'U no dae. Ye'U no' build up the pairty wi' that "kind o' a saut;. Stratton, man, bottle that bazoo o' yours and try toe cet yerself ' into a pious an' sober frame o' mind. It's fair poleetical Wa^ phe^y uThtot that we get our campaign siller oot o' the price of the weaaa' books. -15- BWD Mam STRATTOK-Ok, mts! Why the very crow« in the tree* the woodchucks in the flel.ls know that w get the stuff from t»'«,'Khool-^ crowd. You may bunco Brother Dcwart. and Brother Spencer, *ad other auy SXWith your^elVrouaum gulT. Thoy're easy and wdbng to ^"J^ forty rod whiskey is water from the well, if you g".?^ necewitiM require it, but it's ditlVrent with the average yot"- Jj« *■ * ™ thnn beUeve that our nmchine is one of tbein "»>" H««n»« o«roil, or that our "Cap" Sullivan, 'f^' Why. CTcrybody knows tne riuKs and grafteri divy ^,«?--"^* for b^og a government of good level-headed buiineee men ib MnMoaeM*. PBOF. Ross— I wasna' refcrrin' tae the fact, Jimmie, but tae the inad- Tieability o' proclaimin' it sac louaiy. Man it .vaJ dam us mair-^f 1 may be idlow^ thi expression-tae tell aboot our denes ^^. the school-book fowft tharif were tae make a clean breast o' a' our dealings wi the grocer. M 1 1 BTi' a' the ither<4 Fowlks >! nna care that mucklo if We let S fS iSe BoweU noo ^rLb a few hunner miles o' timber that they new Li S^kSiSlg ab^fbut they'll no .tan' robbin' the «hool wean., fox thatV takln' the bawbew oot o' their iiin pockata. Bat I'm •OMi* Rumpiinn couM mmto U ptats ttet thwi'i MM robb«7 •bool it Wh ye, HHfoourt, l*dt BiciTATioK >T PBor. B. BupnoiT Hasooow— PHILANTHBOPY TJP-TaDATB. Cheer up my friesdi, we won't get loft, I'll prove the books sell less than cost. The author should always get a third. Because of the labor his brain has stirred; And then the people who books retail Twenty-five per cent., or they 're sure to fail. Then there's the people who job them out. Should have thirty per eent. or thereabout. And there is US, who slave ami toil ' To keep the machine supplio"! with oil; It's understood we should get a touch, And f ortj p«r eentnm is not too mueb. —17- Then ioT papt-r, aud i>riiitiDg, iiud Ijiiidinft too, Nut U'H» than liNC \>vt oont. will .U. If Mju Kiuut lliioo uj' it will »lu>w }«u, buw, Thirtj ihrif |>tr icnt. u thi- whool buoki lo«». Or lu ..tlifr words, and to make it philn, Thirty thruu i>er cent, ii the children gain. ^ow these are the facte ae you ail may eeo, liv case it ie proven, and q e d. We muet juggle the flguree, or 1 tell you We'll have to vacatt, and that p «i q. I'Ror. Kos^i-Man, Uicherd, that's grand; Its real metai.heesica;. V* "nay a' tak pattern from Diek. 11 ye'U gle me a day ttgunn' m the /roajtury I U ^ie ye my picture, Dick. I'm waaUn' to prove that we bae siK>nt n thu -ur- f, UB for the benefit o' tho ratopaym; that we ba. s,Knt it ower uk.i.u buildin ^vlui^ an^ the like: that we tao epeit it a third tm.e by d.stnbuun .i a.n»n« 1ti ^J^T>mh^eL-M^lAt notwlthstaudin- the report o' the Cou.m.ssioa we LlL Bouf^^e »• W»i in tL treasury still, un.l lour or hve nulUou ..uur f"bf. Ye*d i«t too the nfan to prove thu., Dick. Man but ye'ro a ,ra,. n c aLofe o- the real practical nature o' our educational hvb em, esp.M.ulU lUe SUrtieal y«t o't, an' the olussical part, ta.., tor tbac Kttern j. „.e Btau fS- l!Sfrm thinWa'. Noo, let us hae i .horu^ thai 'U n.ak. .he I'orK,, qnuk,.. Swi£!tod. tii the base an" mind the time. Steady Stratton, u>au, ». b^- li^taan tSt noise toL' jut eaaetly the same thing a. m»«e. Nm,, a'the- gither. CfORUa BY TUB OOMPA»'T — THEKE'S A L >. There's a land where we'll all make ..ur pile Up where Ottawa starts l(pr the sea. There the boys get their pulp by the imle QiTing pledgee to help you and me. In this pulp-ulp-ulp, b> and l.ye. We will gulp all this i-ulj. by and bye. Let us t,nilp ulp-ulp all this |.ulp ulp-ulp. For it may be our last ehanee to try. PB. 1 -Ye 're daein" real well. Noo try unither sang. Oie the •Tosioa St .j«ag that 'll mak their lugs dirl. 8080 BT TBK COMPANI— THE TBOUtLtSOME OPPOSITION. There's a lot of pesky fellows who always want to know Why we spend the public money as w.' .Id ; They keep poking in their noscf. and askiu;; us to show What we've .bmo with the suri.lii- that w<; blew. men to save m.me friend. Iron, fvuble, who had labore-l for the cause, We did— a little soinetliiiiK, in our turn. It was hard to have Ma. U... mid keep po:,.tu:ii out the rtu>« la our tale of how the ballots chanced to burn. — 18— WkM w fbt » gntm wder to a friend at doable prlM To get for the MmUbo a UtUe oil, W« Md it iat pleMaat, and it't verr far ffOB bIm^ Ve be ireeiied tke fMilietfBfla ef Hojrta When we give a friend a contract u hell mk* ft Uttia yito And be able for to Iielp ui in liis turn, It'a bard to *ee Carscailen try the littlo game to ipoAl, ▲ad all the whya and whereforoa nsk to learn. Wbea with the eorporatlons wo have flied a little deal, And tbui lecured a rake-off for the boys, W« are reir much diaeouraged, and aad it makea ua f aal f b> qmHwail >y thaVMteaya aad tta PBOr. Boss — That 'b real fine an ' appropriate, but ye might hae said some- thing about MiBcampbcll, an ' Mathcson, an ' I'yne. They're just aa bad ae th« lave o' them. Noo, Rowell, man, ye might gie us sometiiing. Yo« aOMeirioa ought to inspire you tae sing aangs in praise o ' leebnilism. Sato n K. W. BowiLL— PATBIOTIC BEXTIMENTa Palsic'l the hand tliiit forges jokee At our fat rimtraits siiiiiiitiiig; And withered be the nose that pokea Into the school book I'liiitiug. Piior. Ttoss— Stop, ma", stop. Your sentiments are sound enough, and I cordially :i,;rcc -a-i* tin:::, bal thi^ dinn;! duo tor p-Hiir- rirpri-ssion. Yfi'rc nwM eandid man. Ilarcourt, ye maun tak the lad in band an' gie him lessons ia mntapiiwiitfn Noo for a dumga, let na hae something deratiag ac' inpiiiag. — 19 — W«'U riac oor ma' old battle bTina. Nm, Btnttoa, y Beedu Uugh. M' rmSm% teNttt* I'M mm^'. ■bm Mr tn OMiMinr— HOLD TBI POU. B^my comndM, lee th« tlgMd Waving in the dgr; "PhuKOib iwitAan^ aov are needed IRordeetiMi'snigh." "Bold to office for we want it," Boia be aignals still. Wave the anawer, • ' Tap the barf 'I Then,b3r jlnkB,wewiU." See tli<^ Torj- Lost advancing; Whitney leading on; Miglity public issuer culling, Tiirber almost goiw. "Stick to tcm|uT!iiK>' iiiid to toddy," Kdsa, ho sijiiials i-lill. ■Wave the nnsutr. "Tup the barrl, \\itli the stulV we will." Hear the niiybty Stiatt' U rumble With 1 On our leaikr's wnnis we'll gaiublc, Whellier lalt^r "r true. "I'.uiiil us up. fur V f 're-Ontario, " Ross he signals etilL Wave the answer, "t*en gives not his whole time to me Will find himself short of a part of his fee." "Herd Laddie! Isn't your duty the samef" "Not by a jug full, it's part of the game. No man bv di'pnlv uii hicth a spade. With UB it's diliVn'iit - belongs to the trade." "Herd Laddie: What of a ranch over heref" "No sort of place for to fatten a steer." "Cow Puncher! What of a cabinet there!" "And leave our dear Province to other folk's care J 1 love niy dear country so hmg as I see Some thousands and piekings a coming to me." I'KOF. Ross— Tliat "s verv clifyin'. Stratton, man, as I intimate and down tlie whole north country, Hungry we roam, Still looking for a new location— Soniethii'g to carry home. All the country's well culled over, Kvervwhcre we roam. Oh brothers don't you wish 'twas bigger, More stuff to carry home. 'Way over all the whole north country. What is left to-day t What for the coming settler 's comfort, But brushwood, rocks and clayt All the country's well culled over, Everywhere we roam. Oh! brothers don't you wish 'twas bigger- More swag to carry home. Koss— Weel, lads, that'll dae for this time. We haena' spoken o^ a' the beauties an' virtues o' leeberalisni, tae bo sure; neither hae we said a that mght be said o' the alsominations o' Toryism, for on baith these topics 'vhnle volumes might be written an "said. If we had the time I 've nae .loot we might be able to mak it plain tae the meanest comprehension that it wasna us but the Tories that did the personatin' an' pluggin', an' switch.n , an snnilin' n' ballots in Elgin an' Waterloo an' ither places, an that it was a Tory emissary that burned the ballots up in the park. But ^ve 've done very weei; though I maun again caution you against the danger an' inadvisability o- h^in' ower candid an* outspoken. Tf .my o' ye are every tempted to mak allusi.ms tae deals an' grafts in whi.di ithers ye are inter..ste,l. my advice fs tae "let that flee stick tae the wa'." \u' if onybo.ly taunts ye w, be.n intae ony o' thae things .just ".jouk an' let the .law gang by as the ol.l wjd^' his it. Ye're a' in glass houses an' its far bettor bo' tae get iiitae the («i;i,ie lliiiiwiu' Imliit. I«il< litiiril, my Mian. ,vi>"vc Ixh'II awCii' quii't, whn h iniia ' \er ordinary, for though ye sclihuu nay (inythiiiir. ye AVKU. Tlie party feareil defeat and held consultation As to the best method of fortification. (^uoth Harcourt. the learned, the scboid liook ling Will l>ack us »{> in any idd thing. Says Ciihson. .\ttc)rney. thcrc'.s ui hides in his sun. The Tories may grumble but I '11 not prosecute. What, iiro.secute men who have kept us in place.' See them Maiikcd first. :in.l then I'll do nothing .so base, Says Dakota .bdm Diy.i.ii we'll not gi> on the rockn, Tliere's my ranch to i'all b;i( k on, you just bet vour sockt. I '11 .sell my spring calves, cows. Iiiiy crop anri roots, .\nd we'll work up some S(dienu> on thes<' Tory galuutii. l'|> sjioke (ieorgie Ross, the Ontario Premier, .\s long as 1 'm boss, there's nothing to fear. There's big lumber tips; there's Ontario New. .\nd to tickle the public I've invented the Soo. There are railway rebates from approporiationg ; And then a few "dollars from my favored relations. The trusts and combines will come into line, For they can't get away from this string; of mine. Says W. T. R. Preston, who stood in the lobby. Don't forget my good friends, there's my box-stuflSng hobby. There's heaps of new schemes you'll all have to learn, And, don't you forget, there'll be ballots to burn. If the peojde do find in your doings a flaw, Possession's nine points in the eyes of the law. That's the ticket, quoth Ross, we'll pull evcy string And, fair play or foul play, we'll sweep everything. For to carry the day we'll all have to .juggle. Though our bubbles are bursting we'll give tliem a struggle. If things do look muddy and start scandal to rise. We'll look, oh, 80 innocent, and all shut our eyes. We want a full pocket to live at our ease; If a dust is kicked up. don't anyone sneeze. So hug the machine with vigor and zest. If we hold to our seats we can brazen the rest; Swear the treasury's full; swear we've money lent out; Swear any old thing to save us from rout. We've had thirty years, but that's not enough. We'll need thirty more for to bank all the stuff. Though scandals "come out and frauds round us fly, While we've ballots to burn we'll never say die. So hail to Dakota and Uail to the Soo; Hail to any old thing that will help us get through. Curtain. CopiM of this Pamphlet may NOT be had from Alexander Smitii, Secretary Ontario Liberal Association READ THE FOT,T,<)\VINn TKRTIMOM AT.S CIVEN UNSOLICITED BV EMINENT MKN OV ALL CLASSES, Oflto* of the W— •tm— n— •t— r. "'OKONTo, April 1st, I can chpcrfully bear testimony to the high i>u«l eJifying character of the eDtartainiueiitH of the Kow Miiutrels. The seli' siwailowiDg act of Prot'eaator Kuaa 1 rugar< i really eilueational in ita character and entirely in aceord with the etenutl li.^cM ol' things. . J. A. MOD— N— L— D„ Toronto, April Ist, 1902. To raise the moral tone of our BaloouH, to mid to their attractiveness and increuse their patronage, 1 know nothing more ell'ective than a performance by the Koss Miuittreli*. Tlieir rcuditiun uf the screaming iteferendum farce is unrivalled us a thirst provoker. _ _ ^, ^ F. a. 8P— N— CE. ' ' Colborne Street, ToKomo, April let, 1902. I eordially eommond the performances of the Ross Minstrels to the enter- tainment committees of Temperance Societies. Even one rendering of the Bef- (frenduni comedy will cause the mm fiend to quake and flee. Years in faith, hope and charity. ^ J 8 H— V— EB— S— N. Globe Office. Toronto, April 1st, 1902. Xotliing Ix'ttiT lias been (ift'ered to tlmse of imr citizens who delight to ("onibino aimisemeiit with itistructicni than llie eiiteituini. 'nts of the Koss MiustreK which have had a c