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CONTAINIHa, AI£0, MANY INCIDENTS NEVER BEFORE PUBLISHED. ■♦►■ NEW YORK: DE WITT & DAVENPORT, PUBLISHERS, 160 A 162 NASSAU STREET. Entkukd neeoriliDg to Act of Congress, in the j'cnr ln55, by DE WITT & DAVENPORT. In tlio Clerk's Offlca of the U. S. District Court, for tho Southern District of New York. H. TINKOK, STBKBOTYl-BR. (iCOnOE B(J38ELL, PRINTER. G. W. ALEXANDER, BINDBB. PREFACE TO THE FIRST EDITION- This volume embraces not only my " Awful Disclosures/' but a continuation of my Narrative, giving an account of events after my escape from the Nunnery, and of my return to Montreal to procure a legal investigation of my charges. It also furnishes all the testimony that has been published against me, of every description, as well as that which has been given in confirmation of my story. At the close, will be ifound a Review of the whole Subject, furnished by a gVB0" tleman well qualified for the purpose ; and finally, a copious Appendix, giving further particulars interesting to th© public. I present this volume to the reader, with feelings which, I trust, will be in some degree appreciated when it has been read and reflected upon. A hasty perusal, and an imper- fect apprehension of its contents, can never produce such impressions as it has been my design to make by the state- ments I have laid before the world. I know that misap- prehensions exist in the minds of some virtuous people. I am not disposed to condemn their motives, for it does not seem wonderful that in a pure state of society, and in the midst of Christian families, there should be persons who regard the crimes I have mentioned as too monstrous to \fe \ ^ VI PREFACE TO THE FIRST EDITION ' belicvod. It certainly is creditable to American manners and character, that the people are inclined, at the first sight, to turn from my story with horror. There is also an excuse for those who, having received only a general impression concerning the nature of my Disclosures, question- the propriety of publishing such im- morality to the world. They fear that the minds of the young, at least, may be polluted. To such I have to say, that this objection was examined and set aside, long before they had an opportunity to make it. I solemnly believe it is necessary to inform parents, at least, that the ruin from which I have barely escaped, lies in the way of their child- ren, even if delicacy must be in some degree wounded by revealing the fact. I understand the case, alas ! from too bitter experience. Many an innocent girl may this year be exposed to the dangers of which I was ignorant. I am resolved, that so far as depends on me, not one more victim shall fall into the hands of those enemies in whose power I so lately have been. I know what it is to be under the dominion of Nuns and Priests ; and I maintain, that it is a far greater offence against virtue and decency to conceal than to proclaim their crimes. Ah I had a single warning voice even whispered to me a word of caution — had even a gentle note of alarm been sounded to me, it might have turned back my foot from the Convent when it was upon the threshold I If, therefore, there is any one now bending a step that way, whom I have not yet alarmed, I will cry beware ! But the virtuous reader need not fear, in the following pages, to meet with vice presented in any dress but her own deformity. No one can accuse me^of giving a single attraction to crime. On the contrary, I intend my book shall be a warning to those who may hereafter be tempted by vice j and with the confidence that such it will prove to PRETACE TO THE FIRST EDITION. Vll be, I commend it to the careful examination of yirtuous parents,. and am willing to abide by their unbiased opinion, with regard both to my truth, my motives, and the interest which the public have ia the developments it contains, «• I would now appeal to the world, and ask, whether I have not done all that could have been expected of me, and all that lay in my power, to bring to an investigation the charges I have brought against the priests and nuns of Canada. Although it was necessary to the cause of truth, that I should, in some degree, implicate myself, I have not hesitated to appear as a voluntary self-accuser before the world. Wliile there was a hope that the authorities in Canada might be prevailed upon to bring the subject to a legal investigation, I travelled to Montreal in a feeble state of health, and with an infant in my arms only three weeks old. In the face of many threats and dangers, I spent nearly a month in that city, in vain attempts to bring my cause to a trial. When all prospect of success in this undertaking had disappeared, and not till then, I deter- mined to make my accusations through the press ; and although misrepresentations and scandals, flattery and threats, have been resorted to, to nullify or to suppress my testimony, I have persevered, although, as many of my friends hSve thought, at the risk of ibduction or death. I have, I think, afforded every opportunity that could be reasonably expected, to judge of my credibility. I have appealed to the existence of things in the Hotel Dieu Nun- nery, as the great criterion of the truth of my story. I have described the apartments, and now, in this volume, have added many further particulars, with such a descrip- tion of them as my memory has enabled me to make. I have offered, in case I should be proved an impostor, to sub- mit to any punishment which may be proposed— even to a i I iS&- : • •• Vlll l^REFACE TO THE FIRST EDITION. re-dclivcry into the hands of my bitterest enemies, to safifer what they may please to inflict. Now, in these circumstances, I would ask the people of the United States, whether my duty has not been dis- jpharged ? Have I not done what I ought — to inform and to alarm them ? I would also solemnly appeal to the Government of Great Britain, under whose guardianship is the province oppressed by the gloomy institution from which I have escaped, and ask whether such atrocities ought to be tolerated, and even protected by an enlightened and Christian power ? I trust the hour is near, when the dens of the Hotel Dieu will be laid open — when the tyrants who have polluted it will be brought out, with the wretched victims of their oppression and crimes. »■'- - ^- CONTENTS •4th CHAPTER I. Early Life— Religious Education neglected— First Schoola— Entrance into the School of the Congregational Nunnery — Brief Account of the Nunneries in Montreal— The Congregational Nunnery— The Black Nunnery— The Grey Nunnery— Publio Respect for these Institutions — Instruction Received— The Catechism — The Bible 13 CHAPTER II. Story told by a fellow Pupil against a Priest— Other Stories— Pretty Mary— Confess to Father Richards — My subsequent Confessions — Left the Congregational Nun- nery 18 CHAPTER III. Preparations to become a Novice in the Biacic Nunnery— Entrance— Occupations of tlie Novices — ^The Apartments to which they had Access — First Interview with Jane Ray— Reverence for the Superior— Her Reliques— The Holy Good Shepherd, or nameless Nun — Confession of Novices •■••«.. 21 CHAPTER IV. Displeased with the Convent— Left it— Residence at St. Denis— Reliquea— Marriage —Return to the Black Nunnery— Objections made by some Novices— Ideas of the Bible *28 CHAPTER V. Received Confirmation— Painful Feelings— Specim«n of Instruction received en the Subject 88 CHAPTER VI. Taking the Veil— Interview afterward with the Superior— Surprise and horror at her Disdosares— Resolution to Submit 85 1* CONTENTb. CHAPTER VII. Dally Oeremontes— Jano Ray among tho Nuns CHAPTER VIII. 49 Description of Apartments In tho Black Nunnery, In order.— Ist Floor— 2(1 Floor— The Founder — Superior's Management with the Friends of Novices— Religious Liei — Criminulity of concealing Sius ut Confessioa 4S CHAPTER IX. Nuns with similar names — Squanr Nuns— First visit to the Cellar — Description of It —Shocking discovery there— Superior's Instructions— Private Signal of the Priests — Dooks used In the Nunnery — Opinions expressed of the Bible— Specimens of what I knoir of the Scriptures 59 CHAPTER X. Manufacture of Bread and Wax Candles carried on in the Convent— Superstitions — Scapularles — Virgin Mary's pincushion— Her House— The Bishop's power over fire— My Instructions to Novices— Jane Ray— Yacclllatioa of feelings . . 65 CHAPTER XI. Alarming Order from the Superior — Proceed to execute it— Scene in an upper Boom— Sentence of Death, and Murder— My own distress— Reports made to friends of St. Francis 72 CHAPTER XII. Description of the Room of the Three States, and the pictures in it— Jane Ray ridi* culing Priests— Their criminal Treatment of us at Confession— Jane Ray's Tricks with the Nuns' Aprons, Handkerchiefs, and Nightgowns— Apples . . 78 CHAPTER XIII. Jane Ray's Tricks continued — The Broomstick Ohost-Sleep-walking— Salted Cider — Changing Beds — Objects of some of her Tricks — Feigned Humility — Alarm — Treatment of a new Nun — A nun made by stratagem 84 • CHAPTER XV. Influencing Novices— Difficulty of convincing persons from the United States — Tale of the Bishop in the City— The Bishop in the Convent— The Prisoners In the Cells— Practice in Singing — Narratives— Jane Ray's Hymns— The Superior's best Trick 9S CHAPTER XVI. Frequency of the Priests' Visits to the Nunnery— Their Freedom and Crimes— Diffi- culty of learning their Names— Their Holy Retreat— Objections in oar minds- Means used to counteract Conscience— Ingenious Arguments ... 106 ^« ,** .CONTENTR. » C U A I' T K II X V I I . Treatment of young Infant* In the Coiivmu -Talltiiix In Sluep— Amusement!— Ceremoniei at the public interment uf decuaicd Nuiih— Su Ideu dlsiippcarance of the Old Superior— Introduction of the nowr one— Supiirstiiloii— Alarm of a Nun— DiiBculty of Oommuuication with other Nuns Ill CHAPTER XVIII. Disappearance of Nuns — St. Pierre— Oage— My temporary Confinement In a Cell — The Cholera Season — How to avoid it — Ocuupationii in the Convent durin;; the PeHtilence— Manufacture of Wax Candles — The Election Riots— Alarm among the Nuns- Preparations for defence — Peaancea 117 CHAPTER XIX. The Priests of the District of Montreal have free access to the Black Nunnery- Crimes committed and required by them— The Pope's command to comm't inde- cent Crimes— Characters of the Old and New Superiors— The timidity of the latter— I began to be employed in the Hospitals— Some account of them— Warning given me by a sick Nun— Penance by Hanging 12S if h CHAPTER XX. More visits to the imprisoned Nuns— Their fears — Others temporarily put into the Cells- Reliquea— The Agnus Dei— The Priests' private Hospital, or Holy Retreat- Secret Rooms in the Eastern Wing — Reports of Murders in the Convent — The Superior's private Records — Number of Nuns in the Convent — Desire of Eioape— Urgent reason for it— Plan- Delljeratioo — Attempt— Success . • . 184 CHAPTER XXI. At liberty— Doubtful what to do — Found refuge for the night— Disappointment— My first day out of the Convent— Solitude — Recollections, fears, and plans . 143 CHAPTER XXII. Start ft»r Quebec— Recognised— Disappointed again— Not permitted to land- Return to Montreal— Landed and passed through the city before day — Lachine Canal — Intended close of my life 145 CHAPTER XXIII. Awake among strangers— Dr. Robertson— Imprisoned as a vagrant— Introduction to my mother— Stay in her house— Removal from it to Mrs. McDonald's — Return to my mother's— Desire to get to New-York— Arrangements for going . . 149 CHAPTER XXIV. Singular concurrence of circumstances, which enabled me to get to the United States —Intentions in going there — Commence my journey — Fears of my companion- Stop at Whitehall— Injury received in a canal boat— Arrival at New- York— A ■oUUry retreat 165 «l zU CONTENTS . CHAPTER XXV. Befleotions and sorrow in solitude — Niglit— Fears— Exposure to rain— Discovered by strangers— Their unwelcome liindness— Talcen to ttie Bellevni: Almshouse . 159 CHAPTER XXVI. Reception at the Almshouse — Message from Mr. Conroy, a Roman priest in New- Yorlc — His invitations to a private interview— His claims, propositions, and threats— Mr. Kelly's message— Effects of reading the Bible .... 163 CHAPTER XXYII. Proposition to go to Montreal and testify against the priests — Commencement of my journey— Stop at Troy, Whitehall, Burlington, St. Alban's, Plattsburgh, and St. John's— Arrival at Montreal— Reflections on passing the Nunnery . . 169 CHAPTER XXVIII. Received into a hospitable family— Fluctuating feelings— Visits from several per ions— Father Phelan's declarrtions against me in his church— Interviews with a Journeyman Carpenter— Arguments with him 17T CHAPTER XXIX. A Milkman— An Irishwoman— Difficulty in having my Affidavit taken— Legal ol]||ec> tion to it when taken 181 CHAPTER XXX. Interview with the Attorney General of the Province — Attempt to abduct me — More interviews — A mob excited against me— Protected by two soldiers— Convinced that an investigation of my charges could not be obtained— Departure from Montreal —Closing reflections 184 The truth of the work demonstrated . . . 193 Amnsiz.— Reception of the work— Affidavits— Criticisms of the press, &c. . 229 PREFACE. -#► . I Here is the reprint of one of the most formidable books against Nunneries ever publislied. It has produced power- ful impressions abroad, as well as in the United States, and appears destined to have still greater results. It is the sim- ple narrative of an uneducated and unprotected female, who escaped from the old Black Nunnery of Montreal, or Hotel Dieu, and told her tale of suflferings and horrors, without exaggeration or embellishment. Though assailed by all the powers of the Romish priesthood, whom she accused, and by the united influence of the North American press, which, with very small exceptions, was then unenlightened by the discoveries of the present day, the book remains unim- peached, and still challenges the test of fair and open exa- mination. Many an American female, no doubt, is now living, who might justly acknowledge that she was saved from exposure to the suffering, or even the ruin, often the consequences of a Convent education, by the disinterested warning given in this book ; while its author, dishearlened at length by the A- If XIY PREFACE. H powerful combination of Protestants and Papists against her, led to distrust even the few who remained her friends, destitute of the means of living, and alternately persecuted and tempted by her ever watchful and insidious enemies, died some years since, under condemnation (whether just or unjust) for one of the slightest of the crimes which she had charged against them — thus falling at last their victim. American parents have here a book written for the salva- tion of their daughters ; American patriots, one designed to secure society against one of the most destructive but insidious institutions of popery ; American females, an appeal to them of the most solemn kind, to beware of Con- vents, and all who attempt to inveigle our unsuspecting daughters into them, by the secret apparatus of Jesuit schools. The author of this book was a small, slender, un- educated, and persecuted young woman, who sought refuge in our country without a protector ; but she showed the resolution and boldness of a heroine, in confronting her pow- erful enemies in their strong hold, and proved, by the sim- ple force of truth, victorious in the violent conflicts which were waged against her by the Romish hierarchy of Ame- rica and the popular press of the United States. The publishers have thought the present an opportune period to place this work again in the hands of American readers, with such information, in 'a preface, as is necessary to acquaint readers of the present day with the leading cir- cumstances attending and succeeding its original publica- tion. They have examined most of the evidence supporting the truth of the narrative, of which the public can judge as e PREFACE. XV well as themselves. The details would bo voluminous, even of those portions which have been collected since the heat of the controversy which the book long ago excited. Suf- fice it to say, that undesigned and collateral evidence iu corroboration of it has been increasing to the present day ; and that the following brief review of some of the early events will afford a fair specimen of the whole. In the year 1835, Maria Monk was found alone, and in a wretched and feeble condition, on the outskirts of New York city, by a humane man, who got her admitted into the hospital at Bellevue. She then first told the story in outline, which she afterwards and uniformly repeated in detail, and which was carefully written down and published in the following form : — she said she was a fugitive nun from the Hotel Dieu of Montreal, whence she had effected her escape, in consequence of cruelty which she had suffered, aad crimes which were there committed by the Romish priests, who had the control of the institution, and to which they had access, by private as well as public entrances. Having expressed a willingness to go to that city, make public accusations, and point out evidences of their truth in the convent itself, she was taken thither by a resolute man, who afterwards suffered for an act of great merit ; but she was unable to obtain a fair hearing, appa- rently through the secret ■ opposition of the priests. She returned to New York, where her story was thought worthy of publication ; and it was proposed to have it carefully written down from her lips, and published in a small pamphlet. Everything she communicated was, there- ii i i ' XVI PREFACE. fore, accurately written down, and, when copied out, read to her for correction. But the amount of important mate- rial in her possession, proved to be far greater than had been supposed, and many pages of notes were accumulated on numerous topics brought up to her attention in the course of conversation and inquiry. All those were sub- mitted to persons fully competent to decide as to the reliability of the evidence, and the strictest and most con- scientious care was taken to ascertain the truth. There were but very few Protestants in the United States acquainted with the condition or history of convents in diflferent countries, the characters of those who control and direct them, the motives they have for keeping them secret, the occupations often pursued within their walls, in short, the shameful practices and atrocious crimes of which they have been proved to be the theatres, in modern and ancient times, by Romish ecclesiastics and even popes themselves. The public were, therefore, quite unprepared to believe such accusations against men professing sanctity of life, and a divine commission to the world, although Miss Harrison and Miss Reed of Boston had published startling reports respecting the character of the priests and nuns in that vicinity. • The following were some of the considerations which were kept in view by those who proposed the publication of the narrative : — " If the story is false, it must have been forged by the narrator or some other party. There must have been a motive in either case ; and that may be either to obtain PREFACE. XVll 7 the en a )taia \^ notoriety or money, to injure the reputation of the priests accused, or ultimately to remove the unfavorable impres- sions thrown upon ihem by their former accusers, by first making charges of atrocious crimes, and then disproving them. On the other hand, the story may perhaps be true ; and if so, the world ought to know it. In the meantime, here is an unprotected, and evidently unfortunate young woman, of an interesting appearance, who asks to be allowed to make her complaint, voluntarily consenting to submit to punishment if she does not speak the truth. She must be allowed a hearing." It is but justice to say that the investigation was under- taken with strong suspicions of imposture somewhere, and with a fixed resolution to expose it if discovered. As the investigation proceeded, opinions at first fluctuated, some- times from day to day ; but it became evident, ere long, that if the story had been fabricated, it was not the work of the narrator, as she had not the capacity to invent one so complex and consistent with itself and with many histo- rical facts entirely beyond the limited scope of her know- ledge. It was also soon perceived that she could never have been taught it by others, as no part of it was systema- tically arranged in her mind, and she communicated it in the incidental manner common to uneducated persons, who recount past "scenes in successive conversations. As she declared from the first that she had been trained to habits of deception in the Convent, and accustomed to witness deceit and criminality, no confidence could be claimed for her mere unsupported declarations ; and there- \\W xvm PREFACE. fore a course of thorough cross-questioning was pursued, every effort being made to lead her to contradict herself, but without success. She told the same things over and over again in a natural and consistent manner, when brought back to the same point after intervals of weeks or months. In several instances it was thought that contra- dictions had been traced, but when called on to reconcile her statements, she cleared up all doubt by easy and satis- factory explanations. The course pursued by the priests of Canada and their advocates, was such as greatly to confirm the opinion that she spoke the truth, and that they were exceedingly afraid of it. The following were some of the contradictory grounds which they at different times assumed in their bitter attacks upon her, her friends, and her books : That she had never been in the nunnery. That she had been expelled from it. That she had fabricated everything that she published. That several pages from her book, published in the New York " Sun," were copied verbatim et literatim from a work published in Portugal above a hundred years before, entitled " The Gates of Hell Opened." That there never was a Subterranean passage from the seminary to the nunnery. « That there was such a passage in that direction, but that it led to the River St. Lawrence. That the drawings and descriptions of the nunnery, and especially of the veiled department, were wholly unlike the reality, but applied to the Magdalen Asylum of Montreal. PREFAC E. xix That several objects described by her were in the nun- nery, but not in those parts of it where she had placed thera. (This was said by a person who admitted that he had been lost amidst the numerous and extensive appart- ments when he made his observations.) That the book was fabricated by certain persons in New York who were named, they being gentlemen of the highest character. That the book was her own production, but written under the instigation of the devil. That the author was a layman, and ougkt to be hung on the first lamp-post. That the nunnery was a sacred place, and ought not to be profaned by the admission of enemies of the church. After a committee had been appointed to examine the nunnery and report, and their demand for admission had been published a year or more, the editor of I! Ami dw Pcu- ple, a Montreal newspaper, devoted to the priests' cause, offered to admit persons informally, and did admit several Americans, who had been strong partisans against the " Disclosures." Their letters on the subject, though very indefinite, contained several important, though undesigned admissions, strongly corroborating the book. One of the most common charges against the book was, that it had be/en written merely for the purpose of obtain- ing money. Of the falseness of this there is decisive evi- dence. It was intended to secure to the poor and perse- cuted young female, any profits which might arise from the publication ; bat most of the labor and time devoted to the XX PREFi C E. work were gratuitously bestowed. Besides this tliey de- voted much time to efforts necessary to guard against the numerous and insidious attempts made by friends of the priests, who by various arts endeavored to produce dissen- tion and delay, as well as to pervert public opinion. The book was published, and had an almost unprece- dented sale, impressing deep convictions, wherever it went, by its simple and consistent statements. In Canada, espe- cially, it was extensively received as true ; but as the American newspapers were soon enlisted against it, the country was tilled with misrepresentations, which it was impossible through those channels to follow with refutations. Her noble sacrifices for the good of others were misunder- stood, she withdrew from her few remaining friends, and at length died in poverty and prison, a victim of the priests of Rome. Various evidences in favor of its truth afterwards appeared, with which the public have never been generally made acquainted. Some of these were afforded during an interview held in New York, August 17th, 1836, with Messrs. Jones and Le Clerc, who had c©me from Montreal with a work in reply to " Awful Disclosures," which was afterwards published. They had offered to confront Maria Monk, and prove her an impostor, and make her confess it in the presence of her friends. She promptly appeared ; and the first exclamation of Mr. Jones proved that she was not the person he had supposed her to be : " This is not Fanny Johnson .'" said he ; and he afterwards said, " There must be two Maria Monks 1" Indeed, several persons were at different times represented to bear that name ; and much i^K^'' PREFACE. xxi confasion was caused in the testimony by that artifice. The interview continued about two hours, during which tho Canadians made a very sorry ligure, entirely failing to gain any advantage, and exposing their own weakness. At tho close, an Episcopal clergyman from Canada, one of tho company, said : " Miss Monk, if I had had any doubts of your truth before this interview, they would now have been entirely removed." The book of Mr. Jones was published, and consisted of affidavits, &c., obtained in Canada, including those which had previously been published, and which are contained in the Appendix to this volume. Many of them were signed by names unknown, or those of low persons of no credit, or devoted to the service of the priests. Evidence was after- wards obtained that Mr. Jones was paid by the Canadian ecclesiastics, of which there had been strong indications. What rendered bis defeat highly important was, that he was tho editor of UAmi du Peuple, the priests' newspa- per, in Montreal, and he was " the author of everything which had been written there against Maria Monk," and kad collected all "the affidavits and testimony." These were his own declarations. An accurate report of the inter- view was published, and had its proper effect, especially his exclamation — " This is not Fanny Johnson 1" The exciting controversy has long passed, but the authen- tic records of it are imperishable, and will ever be regarded as an instructive study. The corruptions and crimes of nunneries, and the hypocrisy and chicanery 6f those who control them, with the varied and powerful means at their ! I II , n ii-iJ ! xxu PREFACE. command, arc there displayed to an attentive reader, in p colors as dark and appalling as other features of the popish system are among us, by the recent exposures of the impu- dent arrogance of the murderer Bedini, and the ambitious and miserly spirit of his particular friend, the Romish Archbishop of New York. Among the recent corroborations of the " Awful Disclo- sures," may be particularly mentioned the two narratives entitled " Coralla," and " Confessions of a Sister of Char- ity," contained in the work issued this season by the pub- lishers of the present volume, viz. : " The Escaped Kun ; or. Disclosures of Convent Life," &c. Of the authenticity of those two narratives we can give the j)ublic the strongest assurance. After the city of Rome bad been taken by siege by the French army, in 1849, the priests claimed possession of a female orphan-asylum, which had something of the nature of a nunnery. The republican government had given liber- ty to all recluses, and opened all secret institutions. (When will Americans do the same ?) Subsequently, when the papists attempted to reinstate the old system, the females remonstrated, barred the^ doors, and armed themselves with knives and spits from the kitchen, but the French soldiers succeeded in , reducing them by force. During the contest the cry of the women was, " We will not be the wives of the priests !'' In one of the convents in that city, opened by the repub- licans, were found evidences of some of the worst crimes PREFACE. XXlll mentioned by Maria Monk ; uud in another were multitudes of bones, including those of children. A strong effort will probably be made again, by the par- tics exposed by this book, to avoid the condemnation which it throws upon convents — the strongholds of superstition, corruption, and foreign influence, in the United States. The llomish publications, although greatly reduced in number within a few years, will probably pour out much of their unexhausted virulence, as it is their vocation to misrepre- sent, deny, and vilify. They will be ready to pronounce a general anathema on all who dare to reprint, or even to read or believe, such strong accusations against the " holy retreats " of those whom they pretend are " devoted to lives of piety." But we will challenge them to do it again, by placing some of their iron bishops and even popes in the forefront. In the year 1489, in the reign of Henry YIL, Pope Innocent VIII. published a bull for the Reformation of Monasteries, entitled, in Latin, " De Reformaiione Monas- eeriorum,^' in which he says that, " members of monasteries and other religious places, both Clemian, Cistercian, and Prajmonstratensian, and various other orders in the King- dom of England " — " lead a lascivious and tffl^ dissolute life." And that the papist readei^may recei^this decla- ration with due revenpe, we copy the preceding words in Latin, as written by an infallible pope, the man whose wor- shippers address him as " Yicegerent of God on earth." Of course his words must convince them, if ours do not : " Vitam lascivam ducunt, et nunium dissolutam." " Swinf ? W 1 ^ Mj,|:, ! |i ! I . 1 1 I I II' t XX17 PREFACE. Priory," in 1303, had a Prioress named Josiana, whoso con- duct made the name of her house quite appropriate. In France, in the Council of Troyes, A. D. 999, the Arch- bishop said, " In convents of monks, canons, and nuns, wo have lay abbots residing with their wives, sous, daughters, soldiers and dogs ;" and ho charges the whole clergy with being in a depraved and sinful state. But the particulars now before us, of such shameful things in Germany, Italy, &c., for ages, would fill a larger volume than this. Now, let the defenders of nunneries repeat, if they dare, their hackneyed denunciations of those who deny their sanc- tity. Here stand some of their own bishops and popes be- fore us ; and the anathemas must fall first upon mitres and tiaras I Americans will know how much confidence to place in the pretended purity of institutions, whose iniquity and shame have been thus proclaimed, age after age, in a far more extensive manner than by this book. But \Ye can at any time shut their mouths by the mere mention of ** Den^s Theology," which they must not provoke us to refer to. jr 'I h AWFUL DISCLOSURES. •«► CHAPTER I. EABLr BEC0LLE0TI0N8. Early Life— Religious Education neglected— First Schools— Entrance Into the School of the Congregational Nunnery — Brief Account of the Nunneries in Montreal— The Congregational Nunnery — The Black Nunnery — The Grey Nunnery — Publio Respect for these Institutions— lostructiou Received— The Catechism- The Bible. M'Z parents were both from Scotland, but had been resident in Lower Canada some time before their marriage, which took plaee in Montreal ; and in that city I spent most of my life. I was born at St. John's, where they lived for a short time. My father was an oflScer under the British Government, and my mother has enjoyed a pension on that account ever since his death.* According to my earliest recollections, he was attentive to his family; and a particular passage from the Bible, which often occurred to my mind in after life, I may very probably have been taught by him, as after his death I do not recollect to have received any religious instruction at home ; and was not even brought up to read the scriptures : my mother, although nomi- nally a Protestant, not being accustomed to pay attention to her children in this respect. She was rather inclined to think well of the Catholics, and often attended their churches. To my want of religious instruction at home, and the ignorance of my m I lifl * See the affidavit of Tniliam Miller, in the Appendix. 1 I 111 .» 3i m « \ u AWFUL DISCLOSURES. Creator, and my duty, wliich was its natural effect, I think I can trace my introduction to Convents, and the scones which I am to describe in this narrative. When about six or seven years of nge, I went to school to a Mr. Workman, a Protestant, who taught in Sacrament street, and remained several months. There I learned to read and write, and arithmetic as far as division. All the progress I ever made in those branches was gained in that school, as I have never improved in any of them since. A number of girls of my acquaintance went to school to the nuns of the Congregational Nunnery, or Sisters of Charity, as they are sometimes called. The schools taught by them are perhaps more numerous than some of my readers may imagine. Kuns are sent out from that Convent to many of the towns and villages of Canada to teach small schools ; and some of them are established as instructresses in different parts of the United States. When I was about ten years old, my mother asked me one day if I should not like to learn to read and write French ; and I then began to think seriously of attending the school in the Congregational Nunnery. I had already some acquaintance with that language, sufficient to speak it a little, as I heard it every day, and my mother knew something of it. I have a distinct recollection of my first entrance into the Nunnery ; and the day was an important one in my life, as on it commenced my acquaintance with a Convent. I was conducted by some of my young friends along Notre Dame-street till we reached the gate. Entering that, we walked some distance along the side of a building towards the chapel, until we reached a door, stopped, and rung a bell. This was soon opened, and entering, we proceeded through a long covered passage till we took a short turn to the left, soon after which we reached the door of the school-room. On my entrance, the Superior met me, and told me first of all that I must always dip my fingers into the holy water at her door, cross myself, and say a siiort prayer ; and this she told me was always required of Protestant as well as Catholic children. There were about fifty girls in the school, and the nuns pro- fessed to teach something of reading, writing, arithmetic, and EARLY RECOLLECTIONS. 15 geography. Tho methods, however, were very imperfect, and little attention was devoted to them, the time being in a great degree engrossed with lessons in needle-work, which was per- formed with much skill. The nuns had no very regular parts asfijj'ned ihem in the management of the schools. They were rather rough and unpolished in their manners, often exclaiming, " c'est uu menti " (that's a lie), and " mon Dion " (my God), on the most trivial occasions. Tlieir writing was quite poor, and it was not uncommon for them to put a capital letter in the middle of a word. The only book on geography which we studied, was a catechism of geography, from wliich we learnt by heart a few questions and answers. We were sometimes referred to a map, but it was only to point out Montreal or Quebec, or some other prominent name, while wo had no instruction beyond. It may be necessary for the information of some of my readers, to mention that there are three distinct Convents in Montreal, all of dilTereut kinds ; that is, founded on diiferent plans, and governed by different rules. Their names are as follows : — 1st. The Congregational Nunnery. 2d. The Black Nunnery, or Convent of Sister Bourgeoise. 8d. The Grey Nunnery. The first of these professes to be devoted entirely to the education of girls. It would require however only a proper examination to prove that, with the exception of needle-work, hardly anything is taught excepting prayers and the catechism ; the instruction in reading, writing, &o., in fact, amounting to very little, and often to nothing. This Convent is adjacent to that next to be spoken of, being separated from it only by a wall. The second professes to be a charitable institution for the care of the sick, and the supply of bread and medicines for the poor; and something is done in these departments of charity, althoifgii but an insignificant amount, compared with the size of the buildings, and tiie number of the inmates. The Grey Nunnery, which is situated in a distant part of the city, is also a large edifice, containing departments for the oaro of insane persons and foundlings. With this, however, I have less personal acquaintance than with either of the others. 1 have often seen two of the Grey nun?, and know that their rules, . 11 ■■■ t h 1 16 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. as well as those of the Congregational Nunnery, do not confine them always within their walls, like those of the Black Nunnery. These two Convents have their common names (Black and Grey) from the colours of the dresses worn by their inmates. In all these three Convents, there are certain apartments into which strangers can gain admittance, but others from Avhicli they are always excluded. In all, large quantities of various ornaments are made by the nuns, which are exposed for sale ia the Ornament Rooms, and afford large pecuniary receipts every year, which contribute much to their incomes. In these rooms visitors often i)urcliase such things as please them from some of the old* and confidential nuns who have the charge of them. From all that appears to the public eye, the nuns of these Convents are devoted to the charitable objects appropriate to each, the labour of making different articles, known to be manu- factured by them, and the religious observances, which occupy a large portion of their time. They are regarded with much respect by the people at large ; and now and then when a novice takes the veil, she is supposed to retire from the temptations and troubles of this world into a state of holy seclusion, where, by prayer, self-mortification, and good deeds, she prepares her- self for heaven. Sometimes the Superior of a Convent obtains the character of working miracles ; and when such a one dies, it is published through the country, and crowds throng the Convent, who think indulgences are to be derived from bits of her clothes or other things she has possessed ; and many have sent articles to be touched to her bed or chair, in which a degree of virtue is thought to remain. I used to participate in such ideas and feelings, and began by degrees to look upon a nun as the happiest of women, and a Convent as the most peaceful, holy, and delightful place of abode. It il true, some pains were taken to impress such views upon me. Some of the priests of the Seminary often visited the Congregation Nunnery, and both catechised and talked with us on religion. The Superior of the Black Nunnery adjoining, also, occasionally came into the School, enlarged on the advantages we enjoyed in having such teachers, *The term *' old nuD," does not alvrays indicate superior age. \ EARLY RECOLLECTIONS. It and dropped something now and then relating to her own Con- vent, calculated to make us entertain the higiiest ideas of it, and to make us sometimes think of the possibility of getting into it. Among the instructions given us by the priests, some of the most pointed were those directed against the Protestant Bible. They often enlarged upon the evil tendency of that book, and told us that but for it many a soul now condemned to hell, and suffering eternal punishment, might have been in happiness. They could not say any thing in its favour : for that would be speaking against religion and against God. They warned us against it, and represented it as a thing very dangerous to our souls. In confirmation of this, they would repeat some of the answers taught us at catechism, a few of which I will here give. We had little catechisms (" Le Petit Catechism") put into our Lands to study ; but the priests soon began to teach us a now set of answers, which were not to be found in our books, and from some of which I received new ideas, and got, as I thought, important light on religious subjects, which confirmed me more and more in my belief in the Roman Catholic doctrines. These questions and answers I can still recall with tolerable accuracy, and some of them I will add here. I never have read them, as we were taught them only by word of month. Question. " Pourquoi le bon Bleu n'a pas fait tons les com- mandcmens ? Jiepome. "Parce que I'homme n'est pas si fort qn'il pent garder tons ses commandemens. Q. " Why did not God make all the commandments ? A. " Because man is not strong enough to keep them. And another. Q. " Pourquoi Thomme ne lit pas I'Evangile ? i?. " Parce que I'esprit de I'homme est trop born6 et trop faible pour comprendre qn'est ce que Dieu a 6crit. Q. " Why are men not to read the New Testament ? " A. "Because the mind of man is too limited and weak to understand what God has written." These questions and answers are not to be found in the com- mon catechisms in use in Montreal and other places where I have been, but all the children in the Congregational Nunnery were taught them, and many more not found in these books. i i m I! "^[^ 18 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. CHAPTER II. \\' COXaREGATIONAL NirNNERT. Story told by a fellow Pupil against a Priest— Other Stories— Pretty Mary— Confess to Father Richards — My subsequent Confessions— Left the Congregational Nun- nery. There was a girl thirteen years old -whom I knew in the School, who resided in tlie neighborhood of my mother, and with whom I liad been familiar. She told me one day at school of the con- duct of a priest with her at confession, at which I was astonished. It was of so criminal and shameful a nature, I could hardly believe it, and yet I had so much confidence that she spoke the truth, that I could not discredit it. She was partly persuaded by the priest to believe that he could not sin, because he was a priest, and that anything he did to her would sanctify her ; and yet she seemed doubtful liow she should act. A priest, she had been told by him, is a holy man, and appointed to a holy office, and therefore what would be wicked in other men, could not be so in him. She told me that she had informed her mother of it, who expressed no anger nor disap- probation, but only enjoined it upon her not to speak of it ; and remarked to her, that as priests were not like other men, but holy, and sent to instruct and save us, whatever they did was right. I afterward confessed to the priest that I had heard the story, and had a penance to perform for indulging a sinful curiosity in making inquiries ; and the girl had another for communicating it. I afterward learned that other children had been treated in the same manner, and also of similar proceedings in other places. Indeed, it was not long before such language was used to me, and I well remember how my views of right and wrong were sha- ken by it. Another girl at the School, from a place above Mon- CONGREGATIONAL NUNNERY. 19 treal, called the Lac, told mo the following story of what had oc- curred recently in that vicinity. A young squaw, called la Belle Marie,(pretty Mary,) iiad been seen going to confession at the house of the priest, who lived a little out of the village. La Belle Marie was afterwards missed, and her murdered body was found in the river. A knife was also found covered with blood, bearing the priest's name. Great indignation was excited among the Indians, and the priest immediately absconded, and was never heard from again. A note was found on his table addressed to him, telling him to fly if he was guilty. It was supposed that the priest was fearful that his conduct might be betrayed by this young female ; and he undertook to clear himself by killing her. These stories struck me with surprise at first, but I gradually began to feel differently, even supposing them true, and to look upon the priests as men incapable of sin ; besides, when I first •went to confession, which I did to Father Richards, in the old French church (since taken down), 1 heard nothing improper; fl.nd it was not until I had been several times, that the priests became more and more bold, and were at length indecent in their questions and even in their conduct when I confessed to them in the Sacristie. This subject I believe is not understood nor suspected among Protestants ; and it is not my intention to speak of it very particularly, because it is impossible to do so without saying things both shameful and demoralizing. I will only say here, that when quite a child, I had from the mouths of the priests at confession what I cannot repeat, with treatment corresponding; and several females in Canada have recently assured nie, that they have repeatedly, and indeed regularly, been required to answer the same and other like questions, many of which present to the mind deeds which the most iniquitous and corrupt heart could hardly invent. There was a frequent change of teachers in the School of the Kunnery ; and no regular system was pursued in our instruction. There were many nuns who came and went while I was there, being frequently called in and out without any perceptible reason. They supply school teachers to many of the country towns, usually two for each of the towns with which I was H' U ill- >» \ i 20 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. acquainted, besides sending Sisters of Charity to different parts of tlie United States. Among those wlioni I saw most, was Saint Patrick, an old woman for a mm (that is, about forty), very ignorant, and gross in her manners, witlj quite a beard on her face, and very cross and disagreeable. She was sometimes our teacher in .sewing, and was appointed to keep order among us. We were allowed to enter only a few of the rooms in the Congregational Nunnery, although it was not considered one of the secluded Convents. In tlie Black Nunnery, which is very near the Congregational, is an hospital for sick people from the city ; and sometimes somo of our boarders, such as are indisposed, were sent there to be cured. I was once taken ill myself and sent there, where I remained a few days. There were beds enough for a considerable number more. A physician attended it daily ; and there are a number of the veiled nuns of that Convent who spend most of their time there. These would also sometimes read lectures and repeat prayers to us. After I had been in the Congregational Nunnery about two years, I left it,* and attended several different schools for a short time ; but I soon became dissatisfied, having many and severe trials to endure at home, •which my feelings will not allow me to describe ; and as my Catholic acquaintances had often spoken to me in favour of their faith, I was inclined to believe it true, although, as I before said, I knew little of any religion. While out of the nunnery, I saw nothing of religion. If I had, I believe I should never have thought of becoming a nun. * See the 2d affidavit. BLACK NUNNERY. 21 CHAPTEPw III. BLACK NUNNERY. Prepaia.L J9 to become a Novice in the Blaclc Nunnery— Entrance— Occupations of the Novices— The Apartments to which they had Access— First Interview with Jane Ray— Reverence for the Superior— Her Reliques— The Holy Good Shepherd or nameless Nun — Confession of Novices. At length I determined to become a Black nun, and called upon one of the oldest priests in the Seminary, to whom I made known my intention. The old priest to whom I applied was Father Rocque. Ho is still alive. He was at that time the oldest priest in the Semi- nary, and carried the Bon Dieu, (Good God,) as the sacramental wafer is called. When going to administer it in any country place, he used to ride with a man before him, who rang a bell as a signal. When the Canadians heard it, whose habitations he passed, they would come and prostrate themselves to the earth, worshipping it as God. He was a man of great age, and wore large curls, so that he somewhat resembled his predecessor, Father Roue. He was at that time at the head of the Seminary. This institution is a large edifice, situated near the Congrega- tional and Black Nunneries, being on the east side of ISr6tre Dame street. It is the general rendezvous and centre of all the priests in the District of Montreal, and, I have been told, supplies all the country with priests as far down as Three Rivers, which place, I believe, is under the charge of the Seminary of Quebec. About one hundred and fifty priests are connected with tliat of Montreal, as every small place has one priest, and a number of larger ones have two. Father Rocque promised to converse with the Superior of the Convent, and proposed my calling again, at the end of two weeks, at which time I visited the Seminary again, and was intro* .! : li' m 1 m m •i; is'jp' I III biff j in * 22 AWFUL DISCLOSURES (luced by him to tlie Superior of the Black Knnnery. She told mo she must make some inquiries, before she could give me a decided answer ; and proposed to me to take up my abode a few days at the house of a French family in St. Lawrence suburbs, a distant part of the city. Here I remained about a fortnight; during which time I formed some acquaintance with the family, parti- cularly with the mistress of the house, who was a devoted Papist, and had a high respect for the Superior, with whom she stood on good terms. At length, on Saturday morning about ten o'clock, I called and was admitted into the Black Nunnery, as a novice, much to my satisfaction, for I had a high idea of a life in a Convent, seclud- ed, as I supposed the inmates to be, from the world and all its evil influences, and assured of everlasting happiness in heaven. The Superior received me, and conducted me into a large room, where the novices, [who are called in French Postulantes,) were assembled, and engaged in their customary occupation of sew- ing. Here were about forty of them, and they were collected in groups in difl'erent parts of the room, chiefly near the windows ; but in each group was found one of the veiled nuns of the Con- vent, whose abode was in the interior apartments, to which no novice was to be admitted. As we entered, the Superior in- formed the assembly that a new novice had come, and she desir- ed any present who might have known me in the world to signify it. Two Miss Fougn^es, and a Miss Howard, from Vermont, who had been my fellow-pupils in the Congregational Nunnery, immediately recognised me. I was then placed in one of the groups, at a distance from them, and furnished by a nun called Sainte Clotilde, with materials to make a kind of purse, such as the priests use to carry the consecrated wafer in, when they go to administer the sacrament to the sick. I well remember my feelings at that time, sitting among a number of strangers, and expecting with painful anxiety the arrival of the dinner hour. Then, as I knew, ceremonies were to be performed, for which I •was but ill prepared, as I had not yet heard the rules by which I was to be governed, and knew nothing of the forms to be BLACK NUNNERY. 23 repeated in the daily exercises, except the creed in Latin, and that imperfectly. This was during the time of recreation, as it is called. The only recreation there allowed, however, is that of the mind, and of this there is but little. "We were kept at work, and permitted to speak with each other only on such sub- jects OS related to the Conyerit, and all in the liearing of the old nuns who sat by us. We proceeded to dinner in couples, and ate in silence while a lecture was read. The novices had access to only eight of the apartments of the Convent ; and whatever else we wished to know, we could only conjecture. The sleeping room was in the second story, at the end of the western wing. The beds were placed in rows, with- out curtains or anything else to obstruct the view ; and in one corner was a small room partitioned off, in which was the bed of the night-watch, that is, the old nun that was appointed to oversee us for the night. In each side of the partition were two holes, through which she could look out upon us whenever she pleased. Her bed was a little raised above the level of the others. There was a lamp hung in the middle of our chamber which showed every thing to her distinctly ; and as she had no light in her little room, we never could perceive whether she was awake or asleep. As we knew that the slightest deviation from the rules would expose us to her observation, as well as to that of our companions, in whom it was a virtue to betray one another's faults, as well as to confess our own, I felt myself under a continual exposure to suffer what I disliked, and had iny mind occupied in thinking of what I was to do next, and what I must avoid. I soon learned the rules and ceremonies we had to regard, which were many ; and we had to be very particular in their observance. We were employed in different kinds of work while I was a novice. The most beautiful specimen of the nuns' manufacture which I saw was a rich carpet made of fine wor- sted, which had been begun before my acquaintance with the Convent, and was finished while I was there. This was sent as a present to the King of England, as an expression of gratitude for the money annually received from the government. It was about forty yards in length, and very handsome. Wo wero r.' . I a :it* \' ! I m A ill ■■ .' It 1; 1 m 24 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. ignorant of the amount of money thus received. The Convent of Grey Nuns has also received funds from the government, though on some account or other, had not for several years. I was sitting by a window at one time, with a girl named Jane M^Coy, when one of the old nuns came up and spoke to us in a tone of liveliness and kindness which seemed strange, in a place where everything seemed so cold and reserved. Some remark which she made was evidently intended to cheer and encourage me, and made me think that she felt some inte- rest in me. I do not recollect what she said, but I remember it gave me pleasure. I also remember that her manner struck me singularly. She was rather old for a nun, that is, probably thirty ; her figure large, her face wrinkled, and her dress care- less. She seemed also to be under less restraint than the others, and this, I afterward found, was the case. She sometimes even set the rules at defiance. She would speak aloud when silen^a was required, and sometimes walk about when she ought to have kept her place; she would even s*?y and do things on purpose to make us laugh ; and although often blamed for her conduct, had her offences frequently passed over, when others would have been punished with penances. I learnt that this woman had always been singular. She never would consent to take a saint's name on receiving the veil, and had always been known b}'^ her own, which was Jano Ray. Her irregularities were /ound to be numerous, and penances were of so little use in governing her, that she was pitied by some, who thought her partially insane. She was, therefore, commonly spoken of as mad Jane Ray ; and wheu she committed a fault, it was often apologized for by the Superior or other nuns, on the ground that she did not know what she did. The occupations of a novice in the Black Nunnery are not such as some of my readers may suppose. They are not employed in studying the higher branches of education; they are not offered any advantages for storing their mind, or polish- ing their manners; they are not taught even reading, writing, or arithmetic; nmch less any of the more advanced branches of knowledge. My time was chiefly employed, at first, in work tkl over, when BLACK KCK: EBT 25 and prayers. It is true, during the la ^t year I :udied a great deal, and was required to work but very little ; ^^ut it > * the study of prayers in French and Latin, which I liad mer Ay to commit to memory, to prepare for the easy repetition them on my reception, and after I should be admitted as a nun. Among the wonderful events which had happened in the Oon- vent, that of the sudden conversion of a gay young lady of the city into a nun, appeared to me one of the most remarkable. The fitory which I first heard, while a novice, made a deep impres- sion upon my mind. It was nearly as follows : The daughter of a wealthy citizen of Montreal was passing the church of Bon Secours, one evening, on her way to a ball, when she was suddenly thrown down upon the steps or near the door, and received a severe shock. She was taken up, and removed first, I think, into the church, but soon into the Black Nunnery, which she soon determined to join as a nun ; instead, however, of being required to pass through a long novitiate (which usually occupies about two years and a-hal^ and is abridged only where the character is peculiarly exemplary and devout), she was per- mitted to take the veil without delay ; being declared by God to a priest to be in a state of sanctity. The meaning of this expres- sion is, that she was a real saint, and already in a great measure raised above the world and its influences, and incapable of sin- ning, possessing the power of intercession, and being a proper object to bo addressed in prayer. This remarkable individual, I was further informed, was still in the Convent, though I never was allowed to see her; she did not mingle with the other nuns, either at work, worship, or meals; for she had no need of food, and not only her soul, but her body, was in heaven a great part of her time. What added, if possible, to the reverence and mys- terious awe with which I thought of her, was the fact I learned, that she had no name. The titles used in speaking of her were, the holy saint, reverend mother, or saint bon pasteur (the holy good shepherd). It is wonderful that we could have carried our reverence for the Superior as far as we did, although it was the direct ten- dency of many instructions and regulations, indeed of the whole system, to permit, even to foster a superstitious regard for her. i M ii| ■I •(■ <- I '.I i r ■ '■'1 i:! rf .*' 26 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. One of us was occasionally called into her room, to cut her nails or dress lier hair; and wo would often collect the clipping;*, and distribute them to each other, or preserve them with the utmost care. I once picked up uU the stray hairs I could find, after combing her head, bound them together, and kept tiiem fur some time, until she told me I was not worthy to possess things so sacred. Jane M'Coy and I were once sent to alter a dress for the Superior. I gathered up all the bits of thread, made a little bag, and put them iuto it for safe preservation. This I wore a long time around my neck, so long, indeed, that I wore out a number of strings, which, I remember, I rejdaced with new ones. I believed it to possess the power of removing pain, and often prayed to it to cure the tooth-ache, &c. Jane Kay sometimes professed to outgo us all in devotion to the Superior, and would pick up the feathers after making her bed. These she would dis- tribute among us, saying, " When the Superior dies, reliques will begin to grow scarce, and you had better supply yourselves iii season." Then she would treat the whole matter in some way to turn it into ridicule. Equally contradictory would she appear, when occasionally she would obtain leave from the Superior to tell her dreams. With a serious face, which sometimes imposed upon all of us, and made us half believe she was in a perfect state of sanctity, she would narrate in French some unaccount- able vision which she said she had enjoyed. Then turning round, would say, " There are some who do not understand me ; you all ought to be informed." And then she would say something totally different in English, which put us to the greatest agony for fear of laughing. Sometimes she would say that she ex- pected to be Superior herself, one of these days, and other things which I have not room to repeat. While I was in the Congregational Nunnery, I had gone to the parish church whenever I was to confess ; for although the nuns had a private confession-room in the building, the boarders were taken in parties through the streets on different days by some of the nuns, to confess in the church ; but in the Black Kunnery, as we had a chapel and priests attending in the con- fessionals, we never left the building. Oar confessions there as novices, were always performed in* # » BLACK NUNNKUY 27 one way, 8« that it may bo sufficient to describe a bingle case. Those of us wlio were to confess at a purlicuhir time, took our places on our knees near the confessional -box, and after having repeated a number of prayers, &c., prescribed in our booivs, came up one at a time and kneeled beside a tine wooden lattice- work, which entirely separated the confessor from us, yet per- mitted us to place our faces almost to his ear, and nearly con- cealed his countenance from view, even when so near. I recol- lect how the priests used to recline their heads on one side, and often covered their faces with their handkerchiefs, while they lieard me confess my sins, and put questions to me, whicii were often of the most improper and even revolting nature, naming crimes both unthought of and inhuman. Still, strange as it may seem, I was persuaded to believe that all this was their duty, or at least that it was done without sin. Veiled nuns would often appear in the chapel at confession ; though, &i I understood, they generally confessed in private. Of the plan of their confession-rooms I had no information ; but I supposed the ceremony to be conducted much on the same plan as in the chapel and in the church, viz. with a lattice interposed between the confessor and the confessing. Punishments were sometimes resorted to, whiVj I was a novice, though but seldom. The first time I ever saw a gag, was one day when a young novice had done something to offend the Superior. This girl I always had compassion for ; because she was very young, and an orphan. The Superior sent for a gag, and expressed her regret at being compelled, by the bad conduct of the child, to proceed to such a punishment ; after which she put it into her mouth, so far as to keep it open, and then let it remain some time before she took it out. There was a leathern strap fastened to each end, and buckled to the back part of the head. « ^ ST I I 1^ I , I 4,v Ef .1 ;tl M M'f ml I' 'a' ) ■ , i* i t. . •» *r Ml! i.ii 28 AWFUL DISCLOSURES CHAPTER IV. % Displeased with tlie Oonrent— Left it — Residence at St. Denis — Rellques — Marriage — Return to the Blacic Nunnery — Objections made by some Novices— Ideas of the Bible. After I had been in the nunneries four or live years, from the time I commenced school at the Congregational Convent, one day I was treated by one of the nuns in a manner which dis- pleased me, and because I expressed some resentment, was required to beg her pardon. Not being satisfied with this, although I complied with the command, nor with the coolness witli whi6h the Superior treated me, I determined to quit the Convent «it once, which I did without asking leave. There would have been no obstacle to my departure, I presume, novice as I then was, if I had asked permission ; but I was too much displeased to wait for that, and went home without speaking to any one on the subject. I soon after visited the town of St. Denis, where I saw two young ladies with whom I had formerly been acquainted in Montreal, and one of them a former schoolmate at Mr. Workman's school. After some conversation with me, and learning that I had known a lady who kept school in the place, they advised me to apply to her to be employed as her assistant teacher ; for she was then Instructing the government school in that place. I visited her, and found her willing, and I engaged at once as her assistant. The government society paid her 201. a-year : she was obliged to teach ten children gratuitously ; might receive fifteen pence a month (about a quarter of a dollar), for each of ten scholars more; and then she was at liberty, accori^ng to ^he regulations, to clemand as much as she plef^d for tlie other ^P|>ils. The course of instraotion, as required b|.the sociely, embraced only >• BLACK NUNNERY. 29 readin^, "writing, and what was called ciphering, though I tliink improperly. The only books used were a spelling-book, I'lnstruc- tion de la Jeunesse, the Catholic New Testament, and I'Hiistoire de Canada. Wlien these had been read through, in regular suc- cession, the children were dismissed as liaving completed their education. Ko difficulty is found in making the common French Canadians content with such aa amount of instruc- tion as this; on the contrary, it is often very hard indeed to prevail upon them to send their children at all, for they say it takes too much of the love of God from them to sent them to school. The teacher strictly complied with the requisitions of the society in whose employment she was, and the Eoman Catholic catechism was regularly taught in the school, as much from choice as from submission to authority, as she was a strict Catholic. I had brought with me the little bag I have before mentioned, in which I had so long kept the clippings of the thread left after making a dress for the Superior. Such was my regard for it, that I continued to wear it constantly round my neck, and to feel the same reverence for its supposed virtues as before. I occasionally had the toothache during my stay at St. Denis, and then always relied on the influence of my little bag. On such occasions I would say — "By the virtue of this bag, may I be delivered from the toothache ;'' and I supposed that when it ceased, it was owing to that cause. While engaged in this manner, I became acquainted with a man who soon proposed marriage ; and young and ignorant of the world as I was, I heard his offers with favour. On consult- ing with my friend, she expressed an interest for me, advised me against taking such a step, and especially as I knew little about the man, except that a report was circulated unfavorable to his character. Unfortunately, I was not wise enough to listen to her advice, and hastily married. In a few weeks, I had occa- sion to repent of the step I had t»>^ken, as the report proved true — a report which I thought justified, and indeed required, our fn to mention the ceremonies which touk place at din- ner. This description may give an idea of the manner in which we always took our meals, although there were some points in which the breakfast and supper were diflferent. At 11 o'clock the bell rung for dinner, and the nuns all took their places in a double row, in the same order as that in which they left the chapel in the morning, except that my companion 8nd myself were stationed at the end of the line. Standing thus for a moment, with our hands placed one on the other over the breast, and hidden in our large cuffs, with our heads bent for- ward, and eyes fixed on the floor ; an old nun who stood at the door, clapped her hands as a signal for us to proceed, and the procession moved on, while we all commenced the repetition of litanies. We walked on in this order, repeating all the way, until we reached the door of the dining-room, where we were divided into two lines ; those on the right passing down one side of the long table, and those on the left the other, till all were in, and each stopped in her place. The plates were all ranged, each with a knife, fork, and spoon, rolled up in a napkin, and tied round with a linen band marked with the owner's name. My own plate, knife, fork, &c., were prepared like the rest, and on the band around them I found my new name written : — "Saint Eustace." There we stood till all had concluded the litany ; when the old nun who had taken her place at the head of the table next the door, said the prayer before meat, beginning " Benedicite," and we sat down. I do not remember of what our dinner con- sisted, but we usually had soup and some plain dish of meat, the remains of which were occasionally served up at supper as a fricassee. One of the nuns who had been appointed to read that day, rose and began to lecture from a book put into her hands by the Superior, while tho rest of us ate in perfect silence. The BLACK NUNNERY 41 nnn who reads ^luring dinner stays afterward to dine. As fast OS we finished, our meals, each rolled up her knife, fork, nnd spoon in lier napkin, and bound them togetlier with the band, and set with hands folded. The old nun then said a short prayer, rose, stepped a little aside, clapped her hands, and we mnrelied towards the door, bowing as Ave passed before a little chapel or glass box, containing a wax image of the infant Jesus. Nothing important occurred until late in the afternoon, Avlien, as I was sitting in tlie community-room, Father Dufr^sne called me out, saying he wished to speak with me. I feared what was liis intention ; but I dared not disobey. In a private apartment, he treated me in a brutal manner ; and from two other priests I afterward received similar usage that evening. Father Du- fr^sne afterward appeared again ; and I was compelled to re- main in company with him until morning. I am assured that the conduct of the priests in our Convent has never been exposed, and is not imagined by the people of the United States. This induces me to say what I do, notwith- standing the strong reasons I have to let it remain unknown. Still, I cannot force mvself to speak on such subjects except in the most brief manner. ' ..11 ill' 'f 1- ' > MS i 1 lis 1 ( m'j m 42 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. CHAPTER VII. Daily Geremonief— Jane Bay among the Nuns. On Thursday morning, the bell rung at lialf-past six to awaken us. The old nuu who was acting as night-watch immediately spoke aloud : "Voici le Seigneur qui vient." (Behold the Lord cometh.) The nuns all responded : ^^ Allons-y devant lui." (Let us go and meet him.) We then rose immediately, and dressed as expeditiously as possible, stepping into the passuge-way at the foot of our beds as soon as we were ready, and taking places each beside her opposite companion. Thus we were soon drawn up in a double row the wholejength of the room, with our hands folded across our breasts, and concealed in the broad cuffs of our sleeves. Not a word was uttered. When the signal was given, we all pro- ceeded to the community-room, which is spacious^, and took our places in rows facing the entrance, near which the Superior was seated in a vergiere, or large chair. We first repeated, "Au nom du Pere, du Fils, et du Saint Esprit — Air.si soit il." (In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost — Amen.) We then kneeled and kissed the floor; then, still on onr knees, we said a very long prayer, begining: Divin Jesiis, Saiiveur de mon Ame, (Divine Jesus, Saviour of my soul). Then came the Lord's prayer, three Hail Marys, four creeds, and five confes- sions (coi fesse t\ Dieu). Next we repeated the ten commandments. Then we repeated the Acts of Faith, and a prayer to the Virgin in Latin, (which, like every thing else in Latin, I never understood a word of.) Next we said the litanies of the holy name of Jesus, in Latin, BLACK NUNNERY. 48 which was afterward to be repeated several times in the course of the day. Then cune the prayer for the beginning of the day ; then bending down, we commenced the Orison Mental (or Mental Orison), wliicii lasted about an hour and a half. Tliis exorcise was considered peculiarly solemn. We were told in the nunnery that a certain saint was saved by the use of it, as ho never omitted it. It consists of several parts: First, the Superior read to us a chapter from a book, which occupied five miinites. Then profound silence prevailed for fifteen min- utes, 'during wliich we were meditating upon it. Then she read another chapter of equal length, on a different subject, and we meditated upon that another quarter of an hour; and after a third reading and meditation, we finished the exercise with a prayer, called an act of contrition, in which we asked forgive- ness for the sins committed during the Orison. During this hour and a half I became very weary, having before been kneeling for some time, and having then to sit ia another position more uncomfortable, with my feet under me, my hands clasped, and my body bent humbly forward, with my head bowed down. When the Orison was over, we all rose to the upright kneel- ing posture, and repeated several prayers, and the litanies of the providences, " providence de Dieu," &c. ; then followed a number of Latin prayers, which we repeated on the way to mass, for in the nunnery we had mass daily. When mass was over we proceeded in our usual order to the eating-room to breakfast, practising the same forms which I liavo described at dinner. Having made our meal in silence, we repeated the litanies of tlie "holy name of Jesus" as we pro- ceeded to the community-room; and such as had not finished them on their arrival, threw themselves upon their knees, and remained there until they had gone through with them, and then kissing the floor, rose again. At nine o'clock comnienced the lecture, which was read by a nun appointed to perform that duty that day ; all the rest of us in tiie room being engaged in work. The nuns were at this time distributed in different community- rooms, at different kinds of work, and in each were listening to 1 m y^. i 'i t%- \ ! \ i , , 1! 1'. II it i ' !i^ ' h , i ■ i^H'l 44 AWFUL DISCLOSURES a lecture. Tliis exercise continned until ten o'clock, when the recreaiion-bell rang. "We still continued our work, but the nuns began to converse "with each other, on subjects permitted by the rules in the hearing of the old nuns, one of whom was seated in each of the groups. At half-past ten the silence bell rang, and then conversation instantly ceased, and the recitation of some Latin prayers com- menced, which continued half an hour. At eleven o'clock the dinner-bell rang, and then we proceeded to the dining-room, and went through the forms and ceremonies of the preceding day. We proceeded two by two. The old nun who had the command of us, clapped her hands as the first cou- ple reached the door, when we stopped. The first two dipped their fingers into the font, touched the holy water to the breast, forehead, and each side, thus forming a cross, said, " In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Gliost, Amen," and then walked on to the dining-room, repeating the litanies. The rest followed their example. On reaching the door the couples divided, and the two rows of nuns marching up, stopped and faced the table against their plates. There we stood, repeating the close of the litany aloud. The old nun then pronounced " Benedioite," and we sat down. One of our number began to read a lecture, which continned during the wliole meal : she stays to eat after the rest have retired. "When we had dined, each of us folded up her napkin, and again folded her hands. The old nun then repeated a short prayer in French, and stepping aside from the head of the table, let us pass out as we came in. Each of us bowed in passing the little chapel near the door, which is a glass case, containing a waxen figure of the infant Jesus. "When we reached the community-room we took our places in rows, and kneeled upon the floor, while a nun read aloud, " Douleurs de notre Sainte Mariq," (the sorrows of our holy Mary.) At the end of each verse we responded "Ave Maria." "We then re- peated again the litanies of the Providences, and the "Bbnis,"&o. *■'.■• ■ 1. w'i * BLACK NUNNERY. 45 1," and then m^i Then -we kissed the floor, and rising, took onr work, with leave to converse on permitted subjects ; that is what is called reereU' Hon till one o'clock. We then began to repeat litanies, one at a time in succession, still engaged at sewing, for an hour. At two o'clock commenced the afternoon lectures, which lasted till near three. At that hour on- The Founder— Superior's Management witli the Friends of Novices— Religious Lies — Criminality of concealing Sins at Confession. I WILL now give from memory, a general description of the interior of the Convent of Black nuns, except the few apartments which I never saw. I may be inaccurate in some things, as the apartments and passages of that spacious building are numerous and various ; but I am willing to risk my credit for truth and sincerity on the general correspondence between my description and things as they are. And this would, perhaps be as good a case as any by which to test the truth of my statements, were it possible to obtain access to the interior. It is well known, that none but veiled nuns, the bishop, and priests, are ever ad- mitted ; and, of course, that I cannot have seen what I profess to describe, if I have not been a Black nun.* The priests who read this book, will acknowledge to themselves the truth of my description ; but will, of course deny it to the world, and proba- bly exert themselves to destroi|^l||pdit. I offer to every reader the following description, kn^^Hlhat time may possibly throw open those secret recesses, anMRlow the entrance of those who can satisfy themselves, with their own eyes, of its truth. Some of my declarations may be thought deficient in evidence ; and this they must of necessity be in the present state of things. But here is a kind of evidence on which I rely, as I see how un- questionable and satisfactory it must prove, whenever it shall be obtained. If the interior of the Black Kunnery, whenever it shall be ex- amined, is materially different from the following description, * I ought to hare made an exception here, which I may enlarge upon In futurOi Otrtain other persona are someUmes admitted. ~t* ,* upon In fatur«i BLACK NUNNERY. 49 then I cau claim no confidence of ray readers. If it resembles it, they will, I presume, place confidence in some of those declara- tious, on whicli I may never be corroborated by true and living witnesses. I am sensible that great changes may be made in the furniture of apartments ; that new walls may bo constructed, or old ones removed ; and I have been credibly informed, that masons have been employed in the nunnery since I left it. I well know, how- ever, that entire changes cannot be made; and that enough must remain as it was to substantiate my description, whenever the truth shall be known. Tlie First Story. Beginning at the extremity of the right wing of the Convent, towards Notre Dame-street, on the first story, there is — 1st. The nuns' private chapel, adjoining which is a passage to a small projection of the building, extending from the upper story to the ground, with very small windows. Into the pas- sage we were sometimes required to bring wood from the yard and pile it up for use. 2d. A large community-room, with plain benches fixed against the wall to sit, and lower ones in front to place our feet upon. There is a fountain in the passage near the chimney at the farther end, for washing the hands and face, with a green cur- tain sliding on a rod before it. This passage leads to tke old nuns' sleeping-room on the right, ano^he Superior's sleeping- room, just beyond it, as well as to a staircasewhich conducts to the nuns' sleeping-room, or dortoir, above. ^LTtlie end of the passage is a door opening into— 8d. The dining-room ; this is larger than the community-room, and has three long tables for eating, and a chapelle, or collection of little pictures, a crucifix, and a small image of the infant Saviour in a glass case. This apartment has four doors, by the first of which we are supposed to have entered, while one opens to a pantry, and the third and fourth to the two next apartments. 4th. A large community-room, with tables for sewing, and a staircase on the opposite left-hand corner. 6th- A community-room for prayer, used by both nuns and 8 * tl. . ' w I li 1 •ii I !;: 4 I 50 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. novices. In the farther riglit-hand corner is a small room par- titioned off, called the room for the examination of conscience, which I had vi.-ited while a novice by permission of the Superior, and where nuns and novices occasionally resorted to reflect on their character, usually in preparation for the sacrament, or when they had transgressed some of the rules. This little room was hardly large enough to contain half a dozen persons at a time. 6th. Next beyond is a large community-room for Sundays. A door leads to the yard, and thence to a gate in the wall on the cross street. 7th. Adjoining this is a sitting-room, fronting on the cross street, with two windows, and a store-room on the side opposite them. There is but little furniture, and that very plain. 8th. From this room a door leads into what I may call the wax-room, as it contains many tigures in wax, not intended for sale. There we sometimes used to pray, or meditate on the Saviour's passion. This room projects from the main building ; leaving it, you enter a long passage, with cupboards on the right, in which are stored crockery-ware, knives and forks, and other articles of table furniture, to replace those worn out or broken — all of the plainest description ; also, shovels, tongs, &c. This passage leads to — ^ 9th. A corner room, with a few benches, &c., and a door leading to a gate on.^tthiliitree'^^. Here some of the medicines were kept, and persons^ere often admitted on business, or to obtain medicineaJwHii tickets from the priests ; and waited till the Superi^ff^ old nun could be sent for. Beyond this room we were i^^r allowed to go ; and I cannot speak from personal knowledge of what came next. * The Second Story. Beginning, as before, at the western extremity of the same wing, but on the second story, the farthest apartment in that direction which I ever entered was — 1st. The nuns' sleeping-room, or dormitory, which I have already described. Here is an access to the projection mentioned in speaking of the first story. The stairs by which we came up BLACK NUNNERY. 51 to bed aro at tlio fartlier end of the room ; and near tliom a cru- ciiix and font of holy water. A door at tlio end of tlio room opens into a passage, with two small rooms, and closets between them, containing bedclothes. Next yon enter — 2d. A small community-room, beyond which is a passage with a narrow staircase, seldom used, which leads into xho fourth community-room, in the first story. Following the passage just mentioned, you enter by a door — 3d. A little sitting-room, furnislied in the following manner : with chairs, a sofa, on the north side, covered with a red-figured cover and fringe, a table in the middle, commonly bearing one or two book?, an inkstand, pens, &c. At one corner is a liitlo projection into the room, caused by a staircase leading from above to the floor below, without any communication with the second story. This room has a door opening upon a staircase leading down to the yard, on the opposite side of which is a gate opening into the cross street. By this way the physician is admitted, except when he comes later than usual. "When he comes in, he usually sits a little while, until a nun goes into the adjoining nuns' sick-room, to see if all is ready, and returns to admit hira. After prescribing for the patients he goes no farther, but returns by the way he enters ; and these two arc the only rooms into which he is ever admitted, except the public hospital. 4th. The nuns' sick-room adjoins the little sitting-room on the east, and has, I think, four windows towards the north, with beds ranged in two rows from end to end, and a few more be- tween them, near the opposite extremity. The door from the sitting-room swings to the left, and behind it is a table, while a glass case, to the right, contains a wax figure of the infan^ Saviour, with several sheep. Near the northeastern corner ou this room are two doors, one of which opens into a long and narrow passage leading to the head^of the great staircase that conducts to the cross street. By this passage the physician sometimes finds his way to the sick-room, when he comes Inter than usual. lie rings tlie bell at the gate, wliich I was told had a concealed pull, known only to him and the prl-ests, proceeds up-stairs and through the passage, rapping three times at tho li! I " St i" f 4 ■;il! 62 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. '\l i door of the sick-room, whicli is opened by a nun in attendance, after slie has given one rap in rej)!}'. "When he has visited hia patients, and prescribed for tlieni, he returns by the same way. 5th, Next beyond this sick-room, is a large unoccupied apart- ment, lialf divided by two partial partitions, whicli leave an open space in the middle. Hero some of the old nuns commonly sit in the day-time. Gth. A door from this apartment opens into anot'her not appropriated to any particular use, but containing a table, where medicines are sometimes prepared by an old nun, who is usually found there. Passing through this room, you enter a passage with doors on its four sides : that on the left, which is kept fastened on the inside, leads to the staircase and gate ; that in front, to private !^ick-rooms soon to be described. 7th. That on the right leads to another, appropriated to nuns suffering with the most loathsome disease. There were usually a number of straw mattresses, in that room, as I well knew, * having helped to carry them in after the yard-man had filled them. A door beyond enters into a store-room, which extends also beyond this apartment. On the right, another door opens into another passage, crossing which, you enter by a door — 8th. A room with a bed and screen in one corner, on which nuns were laid to be examined before their introduction into the sick-room last mentioned. Another door, opposite the former, opens into a passage, in which is a staircase leading down. 9th. Beyond this is a spare-room, sometimes used to store apples, boxes of different things, &c. 10th. Returning now to the passage which opens on one side upon the stairs to the gate, we enter the only remaining door, ■which leads into an apartment usually occupied by some of the old nuns, and frequently by the Superior. 11th, aad 12th. Beypnd this are two more sick-rooms, in one of which those nuns stky ^^ho are waiting their accouchraent, and in the other, those "V^ho have passed it. 13th. The next is a small sitting-room, where a priest waits to baptize the infants previoui^o their murder. A passage leads from this room, on the left, by the doors of two succeeding apart- ments, neither of which have I ever entered. BLACK N U X X E U Y 53 14th. The first of them is the " lioly retreat," or room occu- pied hy the priests, while sutteriug .tlio penalty of their licen- tiousness. 15ih. The otlier is a sitting-room, to which thoy have access. IJeyoud these the passage leads to two rooms, containing closots for tlie storage of various articles, and two others where persons arc received who come on business. The public hospitals succeed, and extend a considerable dis- tance, I believe, to the extremity of the building. By a public entrance in that part, priests often come into the nunnery ; and I have often seen some of them thereabouts, wlio must liave entered by that way. Indeed, priests often get into the " holy retreat" without exposing themselves to the view of persons in other parts of the Convent, and have been first known to be there, by the yard-man being sent to the Seminary for their clothes. Tlie Congregational Nunnery was founded by a nun called Sis- ter Bourgeoise. She taught a school in Montreal, and left property for the foundatior of a Convent. Her body is buried, and her heart is kept, under the nunnery, in an iron chest, which has been shown to me, with the assurance that it continues in per- fect preservation, although she has been dead more than one hundred and fifty years. In the chapel is the following inscrip- tion : " Soeur Bourgeoise, Fondatrice du Convent" — Sister Bour- geoise, Founder of the Convent. Nothing was more common than for the Superior to step has- tily into our community-rooms, while numbers of us were assem- bled there, and hastily communicate her wishes in words like these : — " Here are the parents of such a novice : come with me, and bear me out in this story," She would then mention the out- lines of a tissue of falsehoods, she had just invented, that we might be prepared to fabricate circumstances, and throw in what- ever else might favor the deception. This was justified, and indeed most highly commended, by the system of faith in which we were instructed. It was a common remark made at the initiation of a new nun into the Bhick nun department, that is, to receive the black veil, ^ i . m 1 1 M' 'I lli^ ! i •i: 1 1 : If 'I hi < ■< 64 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. that tho introduction of ftnotlier novice into the Convent as n veiled nun, caused tho introduction of a veiled nun into lieiiven as a saint, Avliich was ou account of tlio sin.!j,ul;ir disappeuranco of Bonjo of the older nuns at tho entrance of new ones 1 To witness tho scenes which often occurred between us and strangers, would have struck a person very powerfully, if ho had known how truth was set at naught. The Superior, with a .'^crious and dignified air, and a pleasant voice and asi>ecr, would coninienco a recital of tiling;* most favorable to the character of the absent novice, and representing her as equally fond of her situation, and beloved by the other inmates. The tale told by the Superior, whatever it was, however unheard before, might hare been any of her statements, was then attested by us, wlio, in everyway we could think of, endeavored to confirm her decla- rations, beyond the reach of doubt. Sometimes the Superior would intrust the management of such a case to some of the nuns, whether to habituate us to the prac- tice in which she was so highly accomplished, or to relieve her- self of what would have been a serious burden to most other persons, or to ascertain whetljer she could depend upon us, or all together, I cannot tell. Often, however, have I seen her throw open a door, and say, in a hurried manner, ''Who can tell the best story ?" One point, on which we received frequent and particular instructions was, the nature of falsehoods. On tiiis subject I have heard many a speech, I had almost said many a sermon ; and I was led to believe that it was one of great importance, one on which it was a duty to be well informed, as well as to act. "What!" exclaimed a priest one day — " what, a nun of your age, and not know the difference between a wicked and a religious lie 1" He then went on, as had been done many times previously in my hearing, to ?how the essential difference between the two different kinds of falsehoods. A lie told merely for the injury of another, for our own interest alone, or for no object at all, he painted as a sin V;^orthy of penance. But a lie told for the good of tho church or Convent, was meritorious, and of course the telling of it a duty. And of this class of lies ther^ were many BLACK NUNNERY. 55 varieties and shades. This doctrine lias been inculcated on me and my companions in the nunnery, more times than 1 can enu- nicrate : and to say that it was generally received, would bo to tell a part of the truth. We otten saw the practice of it, and were Irc'iuently made to take part in it. Whenever anything which the Superior thought important, could be most conve- niently ftcconiplished by falsehood, she resorted to it without scruple. Tiiere was a class of cases ia which she more frequently relied on deception than any other. The friends of the novices frequently applied at the Convent to see them, or at least to inquire after their welfare. It was common for tiiem to be polit< 'y refused an 1 .terview, on some account or other, generally a niere i-ietex . ; and then the Supe- rior usually sought to make as favouiable m impression as possi- ble on the visitors. Sometimes ohe won' I make v • a sLi ry on the spot, and tell the strangers; requiring- some of : to confirm it, in the most convincing way we could. At other times she would prefer to ::i "i.e over to n. 'he task of deceiving, aud we were couiraem ed ij proportioa to o\!r ingenuity and success. Some nun usually showed her submission, by immediately stepping forward. She would then add, perhaps, that the pa- rents of such a novice, whom she nai.td, were in waiting, and it was necessary that they should be told such, and such, and such things. To perform so diftcult a task well, was consid- ered a difticult duty, and it was one of the most certain ways to gain the favour of the Superior. Whoever volunteered to make a story on the spot, was sen. 1' ^mediately to tell it, and the other nuns present were hurried Cil with her under strict injunctions to uphold her in every thing she might state. The Superior, as there was every reason lo believe, on all such occasions, when she did not herself avpoar, hastened to the apartment adjoining that in which the nuns were going, there to listen through the thin partith;n, to hear whether all performed their parts aright. It was not uncommon for her to go rather further, when she wanted time to give such explanations as she could have desired. She would then enter abruptly, ask, " Who can tell a good story 11 i, r 1 ■ t 1 1 1 i i\ 1 !i ;l! 'i fl'i ' r ' ii5 I) iU n 66 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. this morning?" and linrry us off -without a moment's delay, to do our best at a venture, without waiting for instructions. It would bo curious, could a stranger from " the wicked world" outside the Convent witness such a scene. One of the nuns, who felt in a favourable humour to undertake the proposed task, ivould step promptly forward, and signify her readiness in the usual way : by a knowing wink of one eye, and slight toss of the head. " Well go and do the best you can," the superior would say ; *' and all the rest of you must mind and swear to it." The latter part of the order, at least, was always performed ; for in every such case, all the nuns present appeared as unanimous witnesses of everything that was uttered by the spokesman of the day. "We were constantly hearing it repeated, that we must never again look upon ourselves as our own ; but must remember, that we were solemnly and irrevocably devoted to God. Whatever was required of us, we were called upon to yield under the most solemn considerations. I cannot speak on every particular with with equal freedom : but I wish my readers clearly to understand the condition in which we were placed, and the means used to reduce us to what we had to submit to. Not only were we re- quired to perform the several tasks imposed upon us at work, prayers, and penances, under the idea that we were performing solemn duties to our Maker, but every thing else which was re- quired of us, we were constantly told, was something indispensa- ble in his sight. The priests, we admitted were the servants of God, specially appointed by bis authority, to teach us our duty, to absolve us from sin, and to lead us to heaven. Without their assistance, we had allowed we could never enjoy the favour of God ; unless they administered the sacraments to us, wo could not enjoy everlasting happiness. Having consented to acknow- ledge all this, we had no other objection to urge against admit- ting any other demand that might be made for or by them. If we thought an act ever so criminal, the Superior would tell us that the priests acted under the direct sanction of God, and eould not sin. Of course, then, it could not be wrong to comply with any of their requests, because they could not demand any thing but what was right. On the contrary, to refuse to do any BLACK NUNNERY 51 thing they asked, would necessarily be sinful. Such doctrines admitted, and such practices performed, it will not seem won- derful when I mentiori thflf we often felt sometiiing of their preposterous character. Sometimes we took a pleasure in ridiculing some of the favour- ite themes of our teachers ; and I recollect one subject particu- larly, Avhich at one period atibrded us repeated merriment. It may seem irreverent in me to give the account, but I do it to show how things of a solemn nature were sometimes treated in the Convent, by women bearing the title of saints. A Canadian Novice, who spoke very broken English, one day remarked that she was performing some duty " for the God." This peculiar expression nad something ridiculous to the ears of some of us ; and it was soon repeated again and again, in application to va- rious ceremonies which we bad to perform. Mad Jane Ray seized upon it with avidity, and with her aid. it soon took the place of a by-word in conversation, so that we were constantly reminding each other, that we were doing this and that thing, how trifling and unmeaning soever, " for the God." Nor did we stop here : when the superior called upon us to bear witness to one of her religious lies, or to fabricate the most spurious one the time would admit ; to save her the trouble, we were sure to be reminded, on our way to the strangers' room, that we were doing it " for the God." And so it was when other things were mentioned — every thing which belonged to our condition, was spoken of in similar terms. I have hardly detained the reader long enough on the subject, to give him a just impression of the stress laid on confession. It is one of the great points to which our attention was constantly directed. We were directed to keep a strict and constant watch over our thoughts ; to have continually before our minds the ru- les of the Convent, to compare the one with the other, remem- ber every devotion, and tell all, even the smallest, at confession, either to the Superior or to the priest. My mind Avas thus kept in a continual state of activity, which proved very wearisome ; and it required the constant exertion of our teachers, to keep ns up to the practice they inculcated. Another tale recurs to me, of those which were frequently 8* ll ! fill I I ; !' ' f i i) i i ;! 11 h lit I ml it 68 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. told US to make us feel the importance of imreserveJ confession. A nun of our Oonvenr, who liad liidden some sin from her confessor, died suddenly, and wiffll)ut any one to confess lier. Her sisters asseiiihlod to pray for the pence of her soul, wiien she appeared, and informed them, that it would be of no use, but rather troublesome to her, as her pardon was impossible.* The doctrine i.-, that prayers made for souls guilty of uuconfessed sin, do but sink tljem deeper in hell ; and this is the reason I have heard given fctr nt)t praying for Protestants. Tlie authority of the prit^sts in everything, and the enormity of every act which opposes it, were also impressed upon (?hr Diinds, in various ways, by our teachers. A " Father " told us the following story one day at catechism. A man once died who had failed to pay some money which the priest had asked of him ; he was condemned to be burnt in purgatory until he should pay it, but had permission to corao back to this world, and take a human body to work in. He made his appearance therefore again on earth, and liired himself to a rich man as a labourer. Ho worked all day with the fire burning in him, unseen by other people ; but while he was in bed that night, a girl in an adjoining room, perceiving the smell of brimstone, looked through a crack in the wall, and saw him covered with flames. She informed his master, who questioned him the next morning, and found that his hired man was secret- ly suifering the pains of purgatory, for neglecting to pay a certain sum of money to the priest. He, tlierefore furnished him the amount due ; it was paid, and the servant went oft* immediately to heaven. Tlie priest cannot forgive any debt due unto him, because it is the Lord's estate. "While at confession, I was urged to hide notliing from the priest, and have been told by them, that they already knew what was in my heart, but would not tell, because it was necessary for iiic to confess it. I really believed that the priests were acquainted with my thouij;hts ; and often stood in great awe of them. They often told mo they had power to strike nie dead at any moment. * since the first edition, I have found this tale related in a Romish book, as one of very ancient date. It was told to us as having taken place in our Convent. BLACK NUNNERY 59 CHAPTER IX. • Kuns with sioillar names— Sqaw Nuns — First visit to the Cellar — Description of it -Shoclcing discovery there— Superior's Instructions — Private Signal of the Priests — Books Qsed in the Nunnery — Opinions expressed of the Bible — Specimens of what I Icnow of the Scriptures. I FOUND that I had several namesakes among the nuns, for tliere were two others who ah'eady bore my new name, Saint Eustace. This was not a soUtary case, for there wei-e five Saint Marys, and three Saint Monros, besides two novices of that name. Of my namesakes I have little to say, for they resembled most of the nuns; being so much cut off from intercourse with mf and the other sisters, that I never saw anything in them, nor learnt any thing about them, worth mentioning. Several of my new companions were squaws, who had taken the veil at different times. Tliey were from some of the Indiaa settlements in the country, but were not distinguishable by any sti-iking habits of character from other nuns, and were generally not very different in their appearance when in their usual dress, and engaged in their customary occupations. It was evident, that they were treated with much kindness and lenity by the Superior and the old nuns; and this I discovered was done in order to render them as well contented and happy in their situa- tion as possible. I should have attributed the motives for this partiality to their wishing that they might not influence others to keep away, had I not known they were, like ourselves, unable to exert such an influence. And therefore, I could not satisfy my own mind why this difference was made. Many of the Inilians were remarkably devoted to the priests, believing every thing they were taught ; and as it is represented to be not only a high honor, but a real advantage to a family, to have one of its members become a nun, Indian parents will often pay large sums of money for the admission of their daughters into a cou- ! j^ itl •IK 'Iii I '\ \> Iii ll I: ■ I". •Hi' I t! .-1 4-1 i -A m m p It! I r !:, 'I. '.Mllilt I If' 60 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. vent. The father of one of the squaws, I was told, paid to the Superior nearly her weight in silver on her reception, although ho was obliged to sell nearly all his property to raise the money. This ho did voluntarily, because he thought himself overpaid by having the advantage of her prayers, self-sacrifices, &c. for him- self and the remainder of his family. The squaws sometimes served to amuse us ; for when we were partially dispirited or gloomy, the Superior would occasionally send them to dress themselves in their Indian garments, which usually excited us to merriment. Among the squaw nuns whom I particularly remember, was one of the Sainte Uypolites, not the one who figured in a dreadful scene, described in another part of this narrative, but a woman of a far more mild and humane character. Three or four days after my reception, the Superior sent me into the cellar for coal ; and after she had given me directions, I proceeded down a staircase, with a lamp in my hand. I soon found myself ^i on the bare earth, in a spacious place, so dark, that I could not at once distinguish its form, or size, but I observed that it had very solid stone walls, and was arched overhead, at no great elevation. Following my directions, I proceeded onward from the foot of the stairs, where appeared to be one end of the cellar. After walking about fifteen paces, I passed three small doors, on the right, fastened with large iron bolts on the outside, pushed into posts of stone-work, and each having a small opening above, covered with a fine grating, secured by a smaller bolt. On my left, were three similar doors, resembling these, and placed opposite them. Beyond these, the space became broader ; the doors evidently closed small compartments, projecting from the outer wall of the cellar. I soon stepped upon a wooden floor, on which were heaps of wool, coarse linen, and other articles, apparently deposited there for occasional use. I soon crossed the floor, and found the bare earth again under my feet. A little farther on, I found the cellar again contracted in size, by a row of closets, or smaller compartments projecting on each side. These were closed by doors of a difierent description from the first, having a simple fastening, and no opening through them. BLACK NUNNERY. 61 Just beyond, on the left side, I passed a staircase leading np, and then three doors, much resembling those first described, standing opposite three more, on the other side of the cellar. Having passed these, I found the cellar enlarged as before, and here the earth appeared as if mixed with some whitish substance, which attracted iny attention. As I proceeded, I found the whiteness increase, until the sur- face looked almost like snow, and in a short time I observed before me, a hole dug so deep into the earth that I could perceive no bottom. I stopped to observe it. — It was circular, perhaps twelve or fifteen feet across; in the middle of the cellar, and unprotected by any kind of curb, so that one might easily have walked into it, m the dark. The white substance which I had observed, was spread all over the surface around it ; and lay in such quantities on all sides, that it seemed as if a great deal of it must have been thrown into the hole- It immediately occurred to me that the white substance was lime, and that this must be the place where the infants were buried, after being murdered, as the Superior had informed me. I knew that lime is often used by Roman Catho- lics in burying-places ; and in this way I accounted for its being scattered about the spot in such quantities. This was a shocking thought to me ; but I can hardly tell how it affected me, as I had already been prepared to expect dreadful things in the Convent, and had undergone trials which prevented me from feeling as I should formerly have done in similar circumstances. I passed the spot, therefore, with distressing thoughts, it is true, about the little corpses, which might be in that secret bury- ing-place, but with recollections also of the declarations which I had heard, about the favor done their souls by sending them straight to heaven, and the necessary virtue accompanying all the actions of the priests. "Whether I noticed them or not, at the time, there is a window or two on each, nearly against the hole, in at which are some- times thrown articles brought to them from without, for the use of the Convent. Through the windows on my right, which opens into the yard, towards the cross street, lime is received ■■\ m ■u i % I ^1 ,1 62 AWFUL DISCLOSURES I , III I' from cai't3 ; and I then saw a large heap of it near tbo place. Passing the hole, I came to a spot where was another projec- tion on each side, with three cells like those I first described. — Beyond them, in another broad part of tlie cellar, were heaps of vegetables, and other things, on tiie right ; and on the left I found the charcoal I was in search of. This was placed in a heap against the wall, as I might then have observed, near a small high window, like the rest, at which it is thrown in. Beyond this spot, at a short distance, the cellar terminated. The top quite to that point, is arched overhead, though at different heights, for the earth on the bottom is uneven, and in some places several feet higher than in others. Not liking to be alone in so spacious and gloomy a part of the Convent, especially after the discovery I had made, I hastened to fill my basket with coal, and to return.' Here then I was, in a place which I had considered as the nearest imitation of heaven to be found on earth, among a soci- ety where deeds were con:,tantly perpetrated, which I had believed to be most criminal, and I had now found the place in which harmless infants were unfeelingly thrown out of sight, after being murdered. And yet, such is the power of instruction and example, although not satisfied, as many around me seemed to be, that all was * righteous and proper, I sometimes was half inclined to believe it, for the priests could do no sin, and this was done by priests. • Among the first instructions I received from the Superior, were such as prepared me to admit priests into the nunnery from the street at irregular hours. It is no secret, that priests enter and go out ; but if they were to be watched by any per- son in St. Paul's street all day long, no irregularity might bo suspected ; and they might be supposed to visit the Convent for the performance of religious ceremonies merely. But if a person was near the gate at midnight, he might some- times form a difterent opinion ; for when a stray priest is shut out of the Seminary, or is otherwise put to the need of seeking a lodging, he is always -ure of being admitted to the black nun- nery. Nobody but a priest or the physician can ring the bell at BLACK NUNNERY 63 the sick-room door ; much less can any others gain admittance. Tlie i>ull of the bell is entirely concealed, somewhere on the out- side of the gate, I have been told. He makes himself known a;s a priest by a peculiar kind of hissing sound, made by tlie tongue against the teeth, wliile they are kept closed, and the lips open. The nun within, wiio delays to open the door, until informed what kind of an applicant is there, immediately recognizes the signal, and replies with two inarticulate sounds, such as are often used instead of yes, with the mouth closed. The Superior seemed to consider this part of my instructions quite important, and taught me the signals. I had often occasion to use them ; I have been repeatedly called to the door, in the nigh*, while watching in a sick room, and on reaching it, heard the short hissing sound I have mentioned ; then, according to my standing orders, unfastened the door, admitted the priest, who was at liberty to go where he pleased. I will name Mr. Bierze, from St. Denis. The books used in the nunnery, at least such as I recollect of them, were the following. Most of these are lecture books, or such as are used by the daily readers, while we were at work, and meals. These were all furnished by the Superior, out of her library, to which we never had access. She was informed when we had done with one book, and then exchanged it for such another as she pleased to select. Le Miroir du Chretien (Christian Mirror), History of Rome, History of the Church, Life of Soeur Bourgeoise, (the founder of the Convent), in two volumes, L'Ange Conducteur (the Guardian Angel), L'Ange Ciir^tien (the Christian Angel), Les Vies des Saints (Lives of Saints), in several volumes. Dialogues, a volume consisting of conversations between a Protestant Doctor, called Dr. D. and a Catholic gentleman, on the articles of faith, in which, after much ingenious reasoning, the former was confuted. One large book, the name of which I have forgotten, occupied us nine or ten months at our lectures, night and morning. L'Instruclion de la Jeunesse (the Instruction of Youth), contain- ing much about Convents, and the education of persons in the world, with a great deal on confessions, &c. Examen de la Oon- H'l ¥' ' vas from God, and tlierc- foro disregarded it ; but tLo bouse was soon after nussed, wbieli convinced him that the vision was true, and bo told where the house might be found. A picture of the house is preserved in tlio Nunnery, and was Boraetimes shown us. There are also wax figures of Joseph sawing wood, and Jesus as a child, picking up tiie chips. We were taught to sing a little song relating to tliis, the chorus of which I remember. ** Saint Joseph charpentler, Petit Jesua ramassait les copeaux Pour fair bouilllr la marmlte." St. Joseph was a carpenter, little Jesus collected chips to make the pot boil. I began to speak of miracles, and I recollect a story of one, about a family in Italy saved from shipwreck by a priest, who were in consequence converted and had two sons honoured with the priest's office. I had heard before I entered the Convent, about a great fire which destroyed a number of houses in the Quebec suburbs, and wliich some said the Bishop extinguished with holy water. I once heard a Catholic and a Protestant disputing on this subject, and when I went to the Congregational Nunnery, I sometimes heard the children, alluding to the same story, say at an alarm of tire, " Is it a Catholic fire ? Then why does not the Bishop ■• Among the topics on which the bishop addressed the nuns in the Convent this was one. lie told us the story cne day, and said he could have sooner interfered and stopped the flames, but that at last, finding they were about to destroy too many Catli- olic houses, he threw holy water on the fire, and extinguished it. I believed this, and also thought that he was able to put out any fire, but that he never did it, except when inspired. The holy water which the Bishop had consecrated, was con- sidered much more efiicacious, than any blessed by a common BLACK NUNNERY. priest ; and thii) it was which was used in the Convent in spriuk- liujjf our beds. It hftd virtue in it, to keep ofVany evil spirits. Now that I was a nun, I was occasionally sent to read lectures to tlio novices, as other nuns had been while I was a novice. Tliero were but few of us, wlio were thought capable of reading Eiif,'lish well enough, and therefore, I was more fre()uently sent than I might otherwise have been. The Superior often said to me, as I was going among the novices : "" Try to convert them — save their souls — you know you will have a higher place in heaven for every one you convert." For Avhatever reason, Mad Jane Ray seemed to take great delight in crossing and provoking the Superior and old nuns ; and oflen she would cause an interruption when it was most inconvenient and displeasing to them. The preservation of silence was insisted upon most rigidly, and penances of such n nature were imposed for breaking it, that it was a constant source of uneasiness with me, to know that I might infringe the rules in so many ways, and that inattention might at any moment subject me to something very unpleasant. During the periods of meditation, therefore, and those of lecture, work, and repose, I kept a strict guard upon myself, to escape penances, as well as to avoid sin ; and the silence of the other nuns, con- vinced rao that they were equally watchful, and from the same motives. My feelings, however, varied at different times, and so did those of many, if not all my companions, excepting the older ones, who took their turns in watching us. We sometimes felt disposed for gaiety, and threw off all ideas that talking was sinful, even when forbidden by the rules of the Convent. And even when I felt that I might perhaps be doing wrong, I reflected that confession, and certainly penance, would soon wipe off the guilt. I may remark here, that I ere long found out several things, important to be known, to a person living under such rules. One of these was, that it was much better to confess to a priest, a sin committed against the rules, because he w^ould not require one of the penances I most disliked, viz. : those which exposed me to the observation of the nuns, or which demanded sclf- \^ 1 • fi' ill .ii; \iV i! i ■i !!!nt' m w wW h" ;: ii;t; i p II ' '''liiiili m mm 70 AWFUL D 1 S C L O S U U E S debasement before them, like begging their pardon, kissing the floor, or the Superior's feet, &c., and, besides, he as a confessor was said to be bound to secrecy, and could not inform tho Supe- rior against me. My conscience being as effectually unburthened by my confession to the priest, as I had been taught to believe, I therefore preferred not to tell my sins to any one else; and this course I found was preferred by others for the same good reasons. To Jane Ray, however, it sometimes appeared to be a matter of perfect indifference, who knew her violations of rule, or to what penances she exposed herself. Often and often, while perfect silence prevailed among tho nuns, at meditation, or while nothing was to bo heard except tho voice of tho reader appointed for the day, no matter whoso life or writings were presented for our contemplations, Jane would break forth with some remark or question, that would attract general attention, and often cause a long and total inter- ruption. Sometimes she would make some harmless remark or inquiry aloud, as if through mere 'inadvertency, and then her well-known voice, so strongly associated with every thing singular and ridiculous, would arrest tho attention of us all, and generally incline us to smile, and even force us to laugh. Tho Superior would then usually utter some hasty remonstrance, and many a time have I lieard her pronounce some penance upon her; but Jane had ever some apcdogy reauy, or some reply calculated to irritate still ftirther, or to prove to 'every one, that no punishment would be effectual on her. Sometitnes this singular woman would appear to be actuated. by opposite feel- ings and motives; for although she usually delighted in drawing others into difficulty, and has thrown many a severe penance ovoQ upon her greatest favourites; on other occasions she appeared totally regardless of consequences herself, and pre- ferred to take all the blame, anxious only to shield others. I have repeatedly known her to break silence in the com- munity, as if she had no object, or none oeyond that of causing disturbance, or exciting a smile, and as soon as it was noticed, exclaim : " Say it's mo, say it's rue I" Sometimes she would even expose herself to punishments in C O N G K E U A T 1 U N A L N U N N !•; i: V 11 place oC anotJior who was guilty; and thus I foutid ii difUcult fully to imderstiind her. In sonio cases she sceined decidedly out of her wit?^, as the Superior and priests commonly i)referreJ to represent her ; but generally I saw in her what prevented mo from accounting her insane. ^\raong her most common tricks were such as these: Sho gave me the name of the " Devout English Header," because I was often appointed to make the lecture to the English girls ; and sometimes, after taking a seat near me, under pretence of deafness, would whisper it in my hearing, because she knew my want of self-command when excited to laughter. Thus sho often exposed rae to penances for a breach of decorum, and set mo to biting my lips, to avoid laughing outright in the midst of a solemn lecture. "Oh! you devout English Reader!"' would sometimes come upon me suddenly from her lips, with some- thing in it so ludicrous that I had to exert myself to the utmost to avoid observation. This came so often at one time, that I grew uneasy, and told her I must confess it, to unburden my conscience ; I had not done so before, because sho would complain of mo, for giving way to temptation. Sometimes she would pass behind us as vre stood at dinner ready to sit down, and softly moving back our chairs, leave us to fall down upon the floor. This she repeatedly has done ; and while we were laughing together, she would spring forward, kneel to the Superior, and beg her pardon and a penance. ; i ti I 1 f 'ill , r ! M I 1 i i i ■: I u ' - ir I / I !i,illi. ill 12 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. I,IIIU|I I! i i ;'' I !!! CHAPTER XI. Alarming Order from the Superior— Proceed to execute it— Scene In an upper Room— Sentence of Death, and Murder— Sly own distress— Reports made to friends of St. Francis. But I must now come to one deed, in which I had sorao part, and which I look back upon with greater horror and pain, than any occurrences in the Convent, in which I was not the princi- pal sufferer. It is not necessary for me to attempt to excuse myself in this or any other case. Those who have any disposi- tion to judge fairly, will exercise their own judgment in making allowances for me, under the fear and force, the commands and examples, around me I, therefore, shall confine myself, as usual, to the simple narrative of facts. The time was about fivo months after I took the veil ; the weather was cool, perhaps iu September or October. One day, the Superior sent for me and several other nuns, to receive her commands at a particular room. We found the Bishop and some priests with her ; and speaking in an unusual tone of fierceness and authority, she said, " Go to the room for the Examination of Conscience, and drag Saint Francis up-stairs." Nothing more was necessary than tliis unusual command, with the tone and manner which accompanied it, to excite in me most gloomy anticipations. It did not strike nie as strange, that St. Francis should bo in the room to which tho Superior directed us. It was an apartment to which we were often sent to prepare for the communion, r.nd to which we \o]- untarily went, whenever we felt the compunctions which our ignorance of duty, aad the misinstructions we received, inclined us to seek relief from self-reproach. Indeed, I had seen her there a little before. "What terrified me was, fi -st, the Superior's an^^Ty manner ; second, the expression she used, being a French term, whoso peculiar use I had learnt in tho Convent, and whoso BLACK NUNNERY 13 uieaiiiu^ is rutlier solteiied when translated into drag; tliird, llio \A-\CQ to ■\vliich wo were directed to take tho interesting young nun, Jiud the persona assembled there as I supposed to condemn her. My tears were such, concerning the fate that awaited her, and my horror at the idea that she was in some way to be sacrificed, that I would liave given any thing to bo MJiowed to stay where I was. But 1 feared the conseciuenco of disobeying the Superior, and proceeded with the rest towards the room for the examination of couscieucc. T!ie room to which wo were to proceed from that, was in tho second story, and tho place of many a t^ene of a shameful nature. It is sufficient for mo to say, after what i li.?>ve said in other parts of tliis book, that things had there occurred which made nie regard the place with the greatest disgust Saint Francis had appeared melancholy for some time. I well knew that she liad cause, for she had been repeatedly subject to trials which I need not name — our common lot. When we reached the room wiiere wo had been bidden to seek her, I entered tho door, my comiianions standing behind me, as tho place was so small as liardly to hold five persons at a time. The young nun was standing alone near the middle of tho room ; she was probably ixhowt twenty, with light hair, blue eyes^ and a very fair com- plexion. I spoke to her in a compassionate voice, but at tho same time with such a decided manner, that she comprehended my full meaning — " Saint Francis, we are sent for you." Several others spoke kindly to her, but two addressed her very harshly. The poor creature turned round with a look of meek- ness, and without expressing any unwillingness or fear, without even speaking a word, resigned herself to our hands. Tho tears came into my eyes. I had not a moment's doubt that she considered her fate as sealed, and was already beyond the fear of death. She was conducted, or rather hurried to the staircase, which was near by, and then seized by her limbs and clothes, and in fact almost dragged up-stairs, in the sens© tho Superior had intended. I laid my own hands upon her — I took hold of her too,— moro gentle indeed than some of the rost; yet I encouraged and assisted them in carrying her. I % il W ( t ii' 1 s il :ii ilHli II ! i'l ii u AWFUL DISCLOSURES could not avoid it. My refusal would not have saved her, nor prevented her beirg carried up; it would only have exposed mo to some severe punishment, as I believed some of my compan- ions would have seized the first opportunity to complain of me. All the way up the staircase. Saint Francis spoke not a word, nor made the slightest resistance. When wo entered with her the room to which she was ordered, my heart sank witliin me. The Bishop, the Lady Superior, and five priests, viz. JJonin, Ilichards, Savage, and two others, I now ascertained, were assem- bled for her trial, on some charge of great importance. When we had brought our prisoner before them, Father Rich- ards began to question her, and she made ready but calm rej)lies. I cannot pretend to give a connected account of what ensued ; my feelings were wrought up to such a pitch, that I knew not what I did, nor what to do. I was under a terrible apprehension that, if I betrayed my feelings which almost overcame me, I should fall under the displeasure of the cold-blooded persecutors of my poor innocent sister; and this fear on the one hand, with the distress I felt for her on the other, rendered me almost fran- tic. As soon as I entered the room, I had stepped into a corner, on the left of the entrance, where I might partially support myself, by leaning against the wall, between the door and w .n- dow. This support was all that prevented me from falling to the floor, for the confusion of my thoughts was so great, that only a few of the words I heard spoken on either side made any lasting impression upon me. I felt as if struck with some insup- portable blow ; and death would not have been more frightful to me. I am inclined to the belief, that Father Richards wislied to shield the i)oor prisoner from tl»o severity of her fate, by drawing from her expressions that might bear a favorable con- struction, lie asked her, among other thingt', if nho v/as not sorry for what she had been overheard to say, (for she had been betrayed by one of the nuns,) and if she would not prefer confinement in the cells, to the punishment which was threat- ened her. But the Bishop soon irterrupted him, and it was easy to perceive, that he considered her fate as sealed, and w.is determined she sliould not escape. In reply to some of the ques- tions put to iior, she was silent ; to others I heard her voice reply ULAf.ii N U N N E B Y . t6 that she did not repent of words slio had uttered, thongh they had been reported by some of tlie nuns who had heard theui ; that she still wished to escape from the Convent ; and that she had firmly resolved to resist every attempt to compel her to the connuission of crimes which she detested. She added, that sho would rather die than cause the murder of harmless babes. ''That is enough, linish her!" said the Bishop. Two nuns instantly fell upon the young woman, and in obedi- ence to directions, given by the Superior, prepared to execute her sentence. Sho still maintained all the calmness and submission of a lamb. Some of those who took part in this transaction, I believe, were as unwilling as myself; but of others 1 can safely say, that I believG they delighted in it. Their conduct certainly exhibited a most blood-thirsty spirit. But, above all others present, and above all human fiends I ever saw, I think Sainte Uypolite w the most diabolical. Sho engaged in the horrid task with all alacrity, and assumed from choice the most revolting parts to bo performed. Sho seized a gag, forced it into the mtrnth of the poor nun, and when it was lixed between her extended jaws, so as to keep them open at their greatest possible distance, took hold of the straps fastened at each end of the stick, crossed them behind the helpless head of the victim, and drew them tight through the loop prepared as a fastening. The bed which had always stood in one part of the room, still remained there ; though the screen, which had Ur,ually been placed before it, and was made of thick muslin, with only a crevice through which a person behind miglit look out, had been folded up on its Jiinges in the form of a W, and placed in a corner. On the bed the prisoner was laid with her face upward, and then bound with cords, so that sho could not move . In an instant another bed was thrown upon her. One of the priests, named Bonin, sprung like a fury first upon it, and stamped upon it, with all his force, llo was speedily followed by the nuns, until there were as many upon the bed as could find room, and all did wluit they could, not only to smother, but to bruise her. Some stood up and jumped upon the poor girl with their feet, some with their kiUH.H, and others in difierent ways seemed to seek > !- T* : ■; ! ! ^•i ; i 1 i 1 1 !•• ']' ■ii: .11 m ) ) ■li i* liiii mr ^:.'^ M' ^'\v''\um: m m 16 A W K U li DISCLOSURES how tliey iuij,'lit best beat the breath out of lier body, and mauglo it, without cominj,' in direct contact with it, or seeing tho ctFects of their violence. During tiiis time, uiy feelings were almost too strong to been dured. 1 fjlt stupetied, and wass carcely conscious of what 1 did. Still, fear for myself remained in a sutlicient degree to induce mo to some exertion, and I attempted to talk to those who stood next, jjarll}' that I might have an excuse for turning away from tho dreadful scene. After the lapse of fifteen or twenty minutes, and when it Avas presumed that the sufferer had been smothered, and crushed to death, Father IJonin and tho nuns ceased to trample upon her, and stepped from tho bed. All was motionless and silent beneath it. They then began to laugh at such inhuman thoughts as occur- red to some of them, rallying each other in the most unfeeling anner, and ridiculing me for the feelings Wbich I in vain endeavoured to conceal. They alluded to the resignation of our murdered companion, and one of them tauntingly said, " She would have made a good Catholic martyr." After spending some moments in such conversation, one of them asked if the corpse should be removed. The Superior said it had better remain a little while. After waiting a short time longer, the feather-bed was taken off, the cords unloosed, and the body taken by the nuns and dragged down stairs. I was informed that it was taken into the cellar, and thrown unceremoniously into tlie hole which I have already described, covered with a great quantity of lime, and afterwards sprinkled with a liquid, of the i)roperties and name of which I am ignorant. This liquia I have scon poured into tho hole from largo bottles, after tho necks were broken off, and havo heard that it is used in Franco to prevent tlie effluvia rising from cemeteries. I did not soon recover from the shock caused by this scene ; indeeil it still recurs to me, with most gloomy impressions. The next driy there was a melancholy aspect over everything, and recreation time passed in the dullest manner; scarcely anything was said above a whisper. I never heard much said afterward about Saint Francis-. I spoke with one of the nuns, a few words, one day, but avc BLACK NUNNERY. 71 were all cautioned not to expose ourselves very fur, aud could not place mucli reliance iu eacli other. Tlio murdered nun had been brought to her shocking end tlirough the treachery of one of our number, iu wliom she coutided. 1 never knew witli certainty who had reported lier remarks to the Superior, but suspicion fastened on one, aud 1 never could regard her but with detestation. I was more inclined to blame her than some of those employ- ed in the execution; for there could have been no necessity for the betrayal of her feelings. We all knew how to avoid expos- ing each other. 1 was often sent by the Superior to overhear what was said by novices and nuns : when they seemed to shun her, she would say, " Go and listen, they are speaking English ;" and tliough 1 obeyed her, I nayer informed her against them. If 1 wished to clear my consolfPro, I would go to a priest, and confess, knowing that he dared not communicate what I said to any person, and that he would not impose as heavy penances as the {Superior. We were always at liberty to choose another confessor when wo had any sin to confess, which we were unwilling to tell one to Avliom we should otherwise have gone. Not long after the murder just related, a young woman came to the nunnery, and asked for permission to see Saint Francis. It was my former friend, with whom I had been an assistant teacher. Miss Louise Bousquet, of St. Denis. From this, I sup- posed the murdered nun might have come from tliat town, or its vicinity. The only answer returned to the inijuiry was, that Saint Francis was dead. Some time afterward, some of St. Francis' friends called to inquire after her, and they were told that she had died a glorious death ; and further told, that she made some heavenly expres- sions, which were repeated in order to satisfy her friends. f I ; • t '■ r Ml! I i M:*i^ i IS AWFUL DISCLOSURES. CUAPTEK XII. Description of the Room of the Three States, and the pictures in it— Jane Ray ridi- culing I'riests — Their criminiU Treatment of ua at Confession— Jane Ray's Triclcs with tlie NuPH* Apronii, Uandlicrchiefs, and Niglitgowus— Apples. The pictures in the room of the Three States were large, and I)ainted by some artist who understood how to make horrible ones. They a])peared to bo stuck to the walls. The light is ad- mitted from small and high windows, which an curtained, and is rather faint, so as to make every thing look g)^W^« The story told us was, that they were painted by an artfif to whom God had given power to represent things exactly as they are in hea- ven, hell, and purgatory. In heaven, ihe picture of which hangs on one side of the apart- ment, multitudes o( nuns and priestiL- are put in the liighest places, with the Virgin Mary at the head, St. Peter and other saints far above the great numbers of good Catholics of other classes, who were crowded in below. In purgatory are multitudes of people ; and in one part, called " Thej^ldce of ?a??iAs," are infants who died unbaptized. " The place of darhicsSy'^ is that part of purgatory in which adults are collected ; and there they are surrounded with Hames, waiting to bo delivered by the prayers of the living. In hell, the picture of which, and tliut of purgatory, were on the wall opi)osite tliat of heaven, the human faces were the most horrible that can be imagined. Persons of different descriptions were represented, with the most distorted features, ghastly com- plexions, and every variety of dreadful expression ; some with wild beasts gnawing at their heads, others furiously biting the iron bai*3 which kept them in, with looks which could not fail to make a sp^ectator shudder. I could hardly persuade mysolf Hint the figures were not living, HI, ACK NUNNERY. 19 and tlio iinprefsion they nmdo on my feelings was powerful. I was often shown the phico whero nuns go who break their vowb, as a warning. It is the liottest place in hell, and worse, in every point of view, even than that to which Protestants are assigned; because they are not so much to bo blamed, as we were sonio- tinies assured, aslliuir ministers and the Bible, by which they are perverted. Whenever I was shut in that room, as I was several times, T prayed for " les ames dcs fidelea trepasses :" the souls of thoso faithful ones who liave long been in purgatory, and have no re- lations living to pray for them. My feelings were often of the most painful description, while I remained alone with thoso frightful pictures. Jane Kay was onco put in, and uttered the most dreadful shrieks. Some of the old nuns proposed to the Superior to have her gagged : **lj^" she replied ; "go and let out that devil, she maki3s mo sin nfli than all the rest." Jano could not eadure the place ; and she afterward gave names to many of the worst figures in the pictures. On cate- chisni-days she would take a seat behind a cupboard-door, where the priest could not see her, while she faced the nuns, and would make us laugh. '* You are not so attentive to your lesson as you used to be," ho would begin to say, while we were endeavouring to suppress our laughter. Jane would then hold up the first letter of some priest's name, whom she had before compared with one of tho faces in "hell," and look so that wo could hardly preserve our gravity. I re- incniher she named tho wretoli who was biting at tho bars of lioil, with a serpent gnawing his head, with chains and padlocks on, Father Dufresne ; and she would say — " Does not he look like him, when he comes in to Catechism with his long solemn face, and begins his speeches with, 'My children, my liope is, you have lived very devout lives V " The first time I went to confession after taking the veil, I found abundant evidence that the priests did not treat even that ceremony, which is called a solemn sacrament, with respect enough to lay aside tho detestable and shameless character they 80 often showed on other occasions. Tho confessor sometimes I i i I i \l i"* \V^ iil ) 11^ !■' .' «! I ' m r. f i ' \ nil: 1 1 1. Hill i ■ i li! i m m 80 A W F 1- L DISCLOSURES. sat in the room ofexamirmlion of ronscience, nutl somctiriics in the Superior's room, and always nlonc, oxcept the nun who was confessing. ITo had a common cli.iir placed in the middle of the floor, and instead of b'.'iriL' placed behind a grate, or lattice, as in the chapel, had nothing .jcforo or around him. There were no spectators to observe him, and of courrfo any kucIj thing would have been unnecessary. A number of nuns usually confessed on the .«amo day, bnt only one could be admitted into the room at the time. They took their places just without the door, on their knees, and went througli the preparation prescribed by the mk -; of confes- sion; repeating certain prayers, which always occupy a consid- erable time. When one was ready, she rose 1' lu lier ; riees, entered, and closed the door behind her; and no other one even dared touch the latch until she came out. I shall not tell what was transacted at suck|iimes, undc the pretence of confessing, and receiving absoluiion tr;».'n sin: far more guilt was often 'incurred than pardoned ; and crimes of a deep die were committed, while trifling irregularities, in childish ceremonies, were treated as serious oflPences. I cannot persuade myself to speak plainly on such a subject, as I must offend tho virtuous ear. I can only say, that suspicion cannot do any injustice to the priests, because their sins cannot bo exaggerated. ^ome idea may be formed of the manner in which even such women as many of my sister nuns were regarded tho confessors, when I state, that there was often a contest among us, to avoid entering the apartment as long as we could, endeavouring to make each other go first, as that was what most of u dreaded. During the long and tedious days, which fried up the time between the occurrences I have mentioned, nothing, or little took place to keep up our spirits. We were fatigued in body with labour, or with fitting, debilitated by the long continu' ice of our religious exercises, and depressed in feelings by our miserable and hopeless condition. Nothing but the humors of mad Jane Ray, could rouse ns for a moment from our languor and melancholy. To mention all her devices, would require more room than is hero allowed, and a memory of almost all her T^rds and actions n I, A c ic N c N N r: R Y . 81 for yenrs. I liad c.'irly bocotiio a favourite wltii her, anl had oiiportunity to learn moro of her character thiin most of tlio otlier ninis. As this may bo host learnt from hearim? what sho (lid, 1 Avill here recount u few ot her trick-, just ns tlicy iiappeu to present tlieniBelvos to my memory, without regard to the (irdcr of time. Slio one day, in an unaccountahlo liuinour, sprinkled the fl()t)r plentifidly wiili holy water, which brou;;ht upon h- r a severe lecttu'o from the Supeiior, as mi^rht liavo been expected. The Superi »r siid it was a heinous otl'enco ; she iiad wasted holy water enough to save many soids from pnrjjatory ; and what woidd they not give for it! She tlien ordered Jane to ah in iho middle of tlie lloor, and ^ hen the priest came, ho was informed of her ottence. Instc Jiowover, of imposing one of tiioso penances to which she had often been subjected, hut with so little etrect, ho said to her, " Go to your i)Iace, Jane; wo forgivo you for this time.'* I was once se; to iron aprons with Jane ; aprons and pocket- handkerchiefs a-e the only articles of dress which are ever ironed in the Convent. As soon as wo were alone, ^ho remarked, •' Well, we ai-o free from tho rules, whilo wo arc at this work ;" and idthouirh she knew she had no reason for saying so, she began to sing, and I soon joined her, and thus we spent tho time, whilo we were at work, to the neglect of the prayers wo ought to have said. Wo liad no idea that wo were in danger of being overheard, but it happened that the Superior was overhead all tho time, with several nuns, who wore preparing for confession : she canio down and said, " How is this ?" Jane Kay coolly replied, that wo had employed our timo in singing hymns, and referred to mo. I was afraid to confirm so direct a falsehood, in order to deceive tho Superior, though I had ofren told more injurious ones of her fabrication, or at her orders, and said very little in reply to Jane's request. The Superior plainly saw tho trick that was attempte'- and ordered us both to tho room for tho examination of conscience, where we remained till night, -without a mouthful to eat. Tho time was not, however, nnoccupiod ; I received such a lecture 4* } II i ' t .J 1 ■i s^. IMAGE EVALUATION TEST TARGET (MT-3) // ^/ ,<» .«* ^%% ^^S' 1.0 1.1 1^121 12.5 "IB |M £ la 12.0 HiotogieiJiic .Sciences Carporation 23 WBT MAIN STRIIT lMnSTIR,N.Y. 14SM (7l6)t7a-4S03 ? .?' .**% ■"Tt; 8i^ AWFUL DISCLOSURES. from Jane, as I have very seldom beard, and she was so angry with me that we did not speak to each other for two weelcs. At length she found something to complain of against me, had me subjected to a penance, which led to our begging each other's pardon, and we became perfectly satisfied, reconciled, and as good friends as ever. One of the most disgusting penances we ever had to submit to, "was that of drinking the water in which the Superior had washed her feet. Nobody could ever laugh at this penance except Jane Ray. She would pretend to comfort us, by saying, she was sure it was better than mere plain, clear water. Some of the tricks which I remember, were played by Jane with nuns' clothes. It was a rule thac the oldest aprons in use should go to the youngest received, and the old nuns were to wear all the new ones. On four different occasions, Jane stole into the sleeping-room at night, and unobserved by the watch, changed a great part of the aprons, placing them by the beds of nuns to whom they did not belong. The consequence was, that in the morning they dressed themselves in such haste, as never to discover the mistakes they made, until they were all ranged at prayers ; and then the ridiculous appearance which many of them cut, disturbed the long devotions. I laugh so easily, that on such occasions, I usually incurred a full share of penances, I generally, however, got a new apron, when Jane played this trick ; for it was part of her object, to give the best aprons to her favourites, and put off the ragged ones on some of the old nuns whom she most hated. Jane once lost her pocket-handkerchief. The penance for Bucli an offence is, to go without any for five weeks. For this she had no relish, and requested me to pick one from some of the nuns on the way up-stairs. I succeeded in getting two : this Jane said was one too many, and she thought it dangerous for either of us to keep it, lest a search should be made. Very soon the two nuns were complaining that they had lost their hand- kerchiefs, and wondering what could have become of them, as they were sure that they had been careful. Jane seized an opportunity, and slipped one into a straw bed, where it remained until the bed was emptied to be filled with new straw. BLACK NUN NERT. 83 As the winter was coming on, one year, she complained to me that we were not as well supplied with warm night-clothes as two of the nuns she named, whom she said she " abominated." Slie soon after found means to get possession of their fine warm flannel nightgowns, one of which she gave to me, while the other she put on at bed time. She presumed the owners would have a secret search for them ; and in the morning hid them in the stove, after the fire had gone out, which was kindled a little before the hour of rising, and then suffered to burn down. This she did every morning, taking them out at night, through the winter. The poor nuns who owned the garments were afraid to complain of their loss, lest they should have some penance laid on them, and nothing was ever said about them. When the weather began to grow warm in the spring Jane returned the nightgowns to the beds of the nuns, from whom she had borrowed them, and they were probably as much surprised to find them again, as they had before been at losing them. Jane once found an opportunity to fill her apron with a quan- tity of fine apples, caWad fameusea^ which came in her way, and, hastening up to the sleeping-room, hid them under my bed. Then, coming down, she informed me, and we agreed to apply for leave to make our elevens, as it is called. The meaning of this is, to repeat a certain round of prayers, for nine days in suc- cession, to some saint we choose to address for assistance, in be- coming mpre charitable, affectionate or something else. We easily obtained permission, and hastened up-stairs to begin our nine days' feast on the apples ; when, much to our surprise, they had all been taken away, and there was no way to avoid the disagreeable fate we' had brought upon ourselves. Jane there- fore began to search tlie beds of the other nuns ; but not find- ing any trace of the apples, she became doubly vexed and stuck pins in those which belonged to her enemies. When bedtime came, they were much scratched in getting in bed, which made them break silence, and that subjected them to penances. 84 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. CHAPTER XIII. Jane Ray's Tricks continued— The Broomstick Ghost— Bleep-walking— Salted Cider —Changing Beds— Objects of some of her Trick»— Peigned Humility— Alarm— Treatment of a new Nun- A nun made by stratagem. One night, Jane, who had been sweeping the sleeping-room, for a penance, dreseed up the broom-stick, when she had com- pleted her work, with a white cloth on the end, so. tied as to resemble an old woman dressed in white, with long arms stick- ing out. This she stuck through a broken pane of glass, and placed it so that it appeared to be looking in at the window, by the font of holy water. There it remained nntil the nuns came up to bed. The first who stopped at the font, to dtp her finger in, caught a glimpse of the singular object, and started with ter- ror. The next was equally terrified, as she approached, and the next and the next. We all believed in ghosts ; and it was not wonderful that such an object should cause alarm, especially as it was but a short time after the death of one of the nuns. Thus the^went on, each getting a fright in turn, yet all afraid to speak. fA.t length, one more alarmed, or with less presence of mind than the rest, exclaimed, ** Oh, mon Dieu ! Je ne me couoherais pas 1" When the night-watch called out, " Who's that?" 'She confessed she had broken silence, but pointed at the cause ; and then, all the nuns assembling at a distance from the window, Jane offered to advance boldly, and ascertain the nature of the apparition, which they thought a most resolute intention. We all stood looking on, when she stepped to the window, drew in the broomstick, and showed us the ridiculous puppet, which had alarmed so many superstitious fears. 0ome of her greatest feats she performed as a sleep walker. Whether she ever walked in her sleep or not, I am unable with BLACK NUNNERY. 85 »•■*; certainty, to say. She however often imposed upon the Supe- rior and old nuns, by making them think so, when I knew she did not ; and yet, I cannot positively say that she always did. I have remarked, that one of the old nuns was always placed in our sleeping-room at night, to watch us. Sometimes she would be inattentive, and sometimes fall into a doze. Jane Bay often seized such times to rise from her bed, and walk about, occasion- ally seizing one of the nuns in bed, in order to frighten her. This she generally affected ; and many times we have all been awakened, by screams of terror. In our alarm, some of us fre- quently broke silence, and gave occasion to the Superior to lay us under penances. Many times, however, we escaped with a mere reprimand, while. Jane usually received expressions of compas- sion : — " Poor creatnre ! she would not do so if she were in per- fect possession of her reason." And Jane displayed her custom- ary artfulness, in keeping up the false impression. As soon as she perceived that the old nun was likely to observe her, she would throw her arms about, or appear unconscious of what she was doing, falling upon a bed, or standing stock-still, until exer- tions had been made to rouse her from her supposed lethargy. We were once allowed to drink cider at dinner, which was quite an extraordinary favour. Jane, however, on account of her negligence of all work, was denied the privilege, which she much resented. The next day when dinner arrived, we began to taste oxff new drink, but it was so salt we could not swallow it. Those of us who at first discovered it, were, as usual, afraid to speak ; but we set down our cups, and looked round, till the others made the same discovery, which they all soon did, and most of them in the same manner. Some, however, at length, taken by surprise, uttered some ludicrous exclamation, on tasting the salted cider, and then an old nun, looking cross, would cry out : — " Ah! tu oasses la silence 1" (Ah ! you've broken silence.) And thus we soon got a-laughing, beyond our power of sup- pressing it. At recreation, that day, the first question asked hy many of us, was, " How did you like your cider ?" Jane Bay never had a fixed place to sleep in. When the weather began to grow warm in the spring, she usually pushed some bed out of its plaoe, near a window, and put her own t 5f If J ' 86 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. beside it ; and when the winter approached, she would choose a spot near the stove, and occnpy it with her bed, in spite of all remonstrance. We were all convinced that it was generally best to yield to her. She was often set to work, in different ways ; but, whenever she was dissatisfied with doing any thing, would devise some trick that would make the Superior, or old nuns, drive her off ; and whenever any suspicion was expressed, of her being in her right mind, she would say, that she did not know what she was doing ; that all the difficulty arose from her repeating pn;yers too much, which wearied and distracted her mind. I was once directed to assist Jane Ray, in shifting the beds of the iiuns. When we came to those of some of the sisters, whom she most disliked, she said, now we will pay them for some of the penances we have suffered on their account ; and taking some thistles, she mixed them with the straw. At night, the first of them who got into bed, felt the thistles, and cried out. The night-watch exclaimed, as usual, '^ You are breaking silence there." And then another screamed, as she was scratched by the thistles, and another. The old nun then called on all who had broken silence to rise, and ordered them to sleep under their beds, as a penance, which they silently complied with. Jane and I afterward confessed, when it was all over, and took some trifling penance which the priest imposed. Those nuns who fell most under the displeasure of mad Jane Bay, as I have intimated before, were those who had the repu- tation of being most ready to inform of the trifling faults of others and especially those who acted without any regard to honour, by disclosing what they had pretended to listen to in confidence. Several of the worst«^tempered " saints" she held in abhorrence ; and I have heard her say, that such and such, she abomniated. Many a trick did she play upon these, some of which were pain- ful to them in their consequences, and a good number of them have never been traced to this day. Of all the nuns, however, none other was regarded by her with so much detestation as Saint Hypolite ; for she was always believed to have betrayed Saint Francis, and to have caused her murder. She was looked upon by us as the voluntary cause of her death, and of the crime which BLACK NUNNERY. 8t those of us committed, who, unwillingly, took part in her exe- cution. We, on the contrary, being under the worst of fears for ourselves, in case of refusing to obey our masters and mis- tress, thouglit ourselves chargeable with less guilt, as unwilling assistants in a scene, which it was impossible for us to prevent or delay. Jane has often spoken to me of t'/e suspected informer, and always in terms of the greatest bitterness. The Superior sometimes expressed commiseration for mad Jane Ray, but I never could tell whether she really believed her insane or not. I was alw ays inclined to think that she was will- ing to T)ut up with some of her tricks, because they served to divert ? *r minds from the painful and depressing circumstances in which we were placed. I knew the Superior's powers and habits of deception also, and that she would deceive us as will- ingly as any one else. Sometimes she proposed to send Jane to St. Anne^s, a place near Quebec, celebrated for the pilgrimages made to it by per- sons differently afflicted. It is supposed that some peculiar vir- tue exists there, which will restore health to the sick ; and I have heard stories told in corroboration of the common belief. Many lame and blind persons, -with others, visit St. Anne's every year, some of whom may be seen travelling on foot, and begging their food. The Superior would sometimes say that it was a pity that a woman like Jane Bay, capable of being so useful, should be unable to do her duties in consequence of a malady which she thought might be cured by a visit to St. Anne's. Yet to St. Aime's Jane never was sent, and her wild and vari- ous tricks continued as before. The rules of silence, which the others were so scrupulous in observing, she set at naught every hour ; and as for other rules, she regarded them with as little respect when they stood in her way. She would now and then step oat and stop the clock by which onr exercises were regular* ted, and sometimes, in this manner, lengthened out our recrea- tions till near twelve. At last the old nuns began to watch against such a trick, and would occasionally go out to see if the clock was going. She once made a request uiat she might not eat with the other nuns, which was granted, as it seamed to proceed from a spirit ' I t1 I .^' 88 AWPUIi DISCLOSURES of genuine hnmility, which made her regard herself as unworthy of our society. It being most convenient, she was sent to the Superior's table to make her meals after her ; and it did not at first occur to the Superior, that Jane, in this manner, profited by the change, by getting much better food than the rest of us. Thus there seemed to be always something deeper than anybody at first suspected, at the bottom of everything she did. She was once directed to sweep a community-room, under the sleeping-chamber. This oflSce had before been assigned to the other nuns, as a penance; but the Superior, considering tliat Jane Bay did little or nothing, determined thus to furnish her with some employment. She declared to us that she would not sweep it long, as we might soon be assured. It happened that the stove by which that community-room was warmed in the winter, had its pipe carried through the floor of our sleeping-chamber, and thence across it, in a direction opposite that in which the pipe of our stove was carried. It being then warm weather, the first-men- tioned pipe had been taken down, and the hole left unstopped. After we had all retired to our beds, and while engaged in our silent prayers, we were suddenly alarmed by a bright blaze of fire, which burst from the hole in the floor, and threw sparks all around us. We thought the building was burning, and uttered cries of terror regardless of the penances, the fear of which generally kept us silent. The utmost confusion prevailed ; for although we had solemnly vowed never to flee from the Convent even if it was on fire, we were extremely alarmed, and could not repress our feelings. We soon learnt the cause, for the flames ceased in a moment or two, and it was found that mad Jane Ray, after sweeping a little in the room beneath, had stuck a quantity of wet powder on the end of her broom, thrust it up through the hole in the ceiling into our apartment, and with a lighted paper set it on fire. The date of this ^arm I must refej| to a time soon after that of the election riotsf^ for T recollect that she found means to get possession of some cff the powder which was prepared at thdt .#'- m BLACK NUNNERT. S9 time, for An emergency to which some thought the Convent was exposed. She once asked for pen and paper, and when the Superior told her that if she wrote to her friends she must see it, she replied, that it was for no such purpose ; she wanted to write her con- fession, and thus make it once for all. She wrote it, handed it to the priest, and he gave it to the Superior, who read it to us. It was full of offences which she had never committed, evidently written to throw ridicule on confessions, and one of the most ludicrous productions I ever saw. Our bedsteads were made with narrow boards laid across them, on which the beds were laid. One day, while we were in the bedchamber together, she proposed that we should misplace these boards. This was done, so that at night nearly a dozen nuns fell down upon the floor on getting into bed. A good deal of confusion naturally ensued, but the authors were not dis- covered. I was so conscience-stricken, however, that a week afterward, while we examined our consciences together, I told her I must confess the sin the next day. She replied, " Do as you like, but you will be sorry for it." The next day, when we came before the Superior, I was just going to kneel and confess, when Jane, almost without giving me time to shut the door, threw herself at the Superior's feet, and confessed the trick, and a penance was immediate ly laid on me for the sin I had concealed. There was an old nun, who was a famous talker, whom we used to call La M6re, (Mother). One night, Jane Ray r?i up, and secretly changed the caps of several of the nuns, anu jers among the rest. In the morning there was great confusion, and such a scene as seldom occurred. She was severely blamed by La Mere, having been informed against by some of the nuns ; and at last became so much enraged, that she attacked the old woman, and even took her by the throat. La M^re called on all present to come to her assistance, and several nuns interfered. Jane seized the opportunity afforded in the confusion to beat some of her worst enemies quite severely, and afterwards said, that she had intended to kill some of the rascally informers. For a time Janu made us laugh so much at prayers, that the 90 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. Snporior forbade lier going down with us to morning prayers, and she took the opportunity to sleep in the morning. Whei\ this was found out, 8he was forbidden to get into her bed again after leaving it, and then she would creep under it and take a nap on the floor. This she told us of one day, but threatened us if we ever betrayed her. At length, she was missed at break- fast, as slie would sometimes oversleep herself, and the Superior began to bo more strict, and always inquired, in the mornin g whether Jane Bay was in her place. When the question was general, none of us answered ; but when it was addressed to some nun near her by name, as, ^^ Saint Eustace, is Jane Bay in her place?" then we had to reply. Of all the scenes that occurred during my stay in the Convent, there was none which excited the delight of 'Jane more than one which took place in the chapel one day at moss, though I never hbd any particular reason to suppose that she had brought it abont. Some person, unknown to me to this day, had put some sub- stance or other, of a most nauseous smell, into the hat of a little boy, who attended at the altar, and he, without observing the trick, put it upon his head. In the midst of the ceremonies he approached some of the nuns, who were almost suffocated with the odour ; and as he occasionally moved from place to place some of them began to beckon to him to stand farther off, and to hold their noses, with looks of disgust. The boy was quite unconscious of the cause of the difficulty, and paid them no attention ; but the confusion soon became so great, through the distress of some, and the laughing of others, that the Superior noticed the circumstance, and beckoned to the boy to withdraw. All attempts, however, to engage ns in any work, prayer, or meditation, were found ineffectual. Whenever the circumstances in the chapel came to mind, we would laugh out. We had got into such a state, that we could not easily restrain ourselves. The Superior, yielding to necessity, allowed us recreation for the whole day. The Superior used sometimes to send Jane to instruct the novices in their English prayers. She would proceed to her task we bad to BLACK .GUNNERY. M with all seriousness ; but sometimes cbose tbe most ridicnions, as well as irreverent passages, from songs, and otber things, which she had brforo somewhere learnt, which would set us, who uadorstoud her, laughing. One of her rhymes, I recollect, began with : "The Lord of love, look from abovei Upon this turki^ hen." Jane for a time slept opposite me, and often in the night would rise, unobserved, and slip into ray bed, to talk with me, which she did in a low whisper, and return again with equal caution. Blie would tell me of the tricks she had played, and such as she meditated, and sometimes make me laugb so loud, that I had nnich to do in the morning with begging pardons, and doing peuances. One winter's day, she was sent to light a j5re ; but after she had done so, remarked privately to some of us : " My fingers were too cold — you'll see if I do it again." The next day, there was a great stir in the house, because it was said that mad Jane Bay had been seized with a fit while making a fire, and she was taken up apparently Insensible, and conveyed to her bed. She complained to me, who visited her in the course of the day, that she was likely to starve, as food was denied her ; and I was persuaded to pin a stocking under my dress, and secretly put food into it from the table. This I afterward carried to her and relieved her wants. One of the things which I blamed Jane most for, was a dis- position to quarrel with any nun who seemed to bo winning the favour of the Superior. She would never rest until she had hronght such a one into some di£Soulty. We were allowed but little soap ; and Jane, when sho found her supply nearly gone, would take the first piece she could find. One day there was a general search made for a large piece thai was missed ; when, soon after I had been searched, Jane Eay passed me and slipped it into my pocket ; she was soon after searched herself, and then secretly came for it again. While I recall these particulars of our nunnery, and refer so often to the conduct and language of one of the nuns, I cannot !; I' ii: Si I i ';!::) ^ ■m I I :f.: Ml'! I 92 A W F I- L DISCLOSURES. spcnk of 801110 things which I believed or suspected, on acconnt of my want of Hutllcieiit knowledge. But it is a pity you have not Jano Kay for a witness; alio knows many things of which I am ignorant. She must bo in possession of facts that should be known. Her long residence in the Convent, her habits of roam- ing about it, and of observing every thing, must have made her acquainted with things which would be lieard with interest. I always felt as if ehe knew everything. She would often go and listen, or look through the cracks into the Superior's room, while any of the priests were closeted with her, and sometimes would come and tell me what she witnessed. I felt myself bound to confess in such cases, and always did so. She knew, however, that I only told it to the priest or to the Superior, and without mentioning the name of my informant, which I was at liberty to withhold, so that she was not found out. I often said to her, *^ Don't tell me, Jane, for I must confess it." She would reply : " It is better for you to confess it than for me." I thus be- came, even against my will, informed of scenes, supposed by the actors of them to be secret. Jane Hay once persuaded me to accompany her into the Supe- rior's room, to hide with her under the sofa, and await the ap- pearance of a visitor whom she expected, that we might over- hear what passed between them. We had been long concealed, when the Superior came in alone and sat for some time, when fearing she might detect us in the stillness which prevailed, we began to repent of our temerity. At length however, she sud- denly withdrew, and thus afforded us a welcome opportunity to escape. I was passing one day through a part of the cellar, where I had not often occasion to go, when the toe of my shoe hit some- thing. I tripped and fell down. I rose again, and holding my lamp to see what had caused my fall, I found an iron ring, fasten- ed to a small square trapdoor. This I had the curiosity to raise, and saw four or five steps leading down, but there was not light enough to see more, and I feared to be noticed by somebody and reported to the Superior ; so dosing the door again, I left the epot At first, I could not imagine the use for such a pas- v^' BLACK NUNNERY. 98 sago ; but it afterward occurred to roe, that this might open to Ihe bubterrauean passage to tiio Seminary, for I never before cuuld account for the appearance of many of tlie priests, who oi'tou ai)peared and disappeared among us, particularly at night, wiien I know tlie gates were closed. They could, as I now saw, come up to the door of the Superior's room at any hour, then up the Htairs into our sleeping-room, or where they chose. And often they were in our beds before us. I alkrward ascertained that my conjectures were correct, and that a secret communication was kept up, in this manner, between the two institutions, at the end towards Notre Dame-street, at a considerable depth under ground. I often afterward, met priests in the cellar, when sent there for coal and other articles, as they had to pass up and dowu the common cellar stairs on their way. My wearisome daily prayers and labours, my pain of body, and depression of mind which were so much increased by penances I had suffered, and those which I constantly feared, and the feel- ings of shame, remorse, and horror, which sometimes arose, brought me into a state which I cannot describe. In the first place, my frame was enfeebled by the uneasy postures I was required to keep for so long a time during prayers. This alone I thought was sufficient to undermine my health and destroy my life. An hoar and a half every morning I had to sit on the floor of the community-room, with my feet under me, my body bent forward, and my head lionging on one side— in a posture expressive of great humility, it is true, but very fatiguing to keep for such an unreasonable length of time. Often I found it impossible to avoid falling asleep in this posture, which I could do without detection, by bending a little lower than usually. The signal to rise, or the noise made by the rising of the other nuns, then woke me, and I got up with the rest unobserved. Before we took the posture just described, we had to kneel for a long time without bending the body, keeping quite erect, with the exception of the knees only, with the hands together before the breast. This I found the most distressing attitude for me, and never assumed it without feeling a sharp pain in ray chest, whioh I often thought would soon lead me to my grave — 1l'.|^ ;!: r :-;.!l I - > I I'' ;fj ' H 94 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. that is, to the great common reoeplacle for the dead, under the chapel. And this upright kneeling posture we were obliged to resume as soon as we rose from the half-sitting posture first mentioned ; so that I usually felt myself exhausted and near to fainting before the conclusion of morning services. I found the meditations extremely tedious, and often did I sink into sleep while we Were all seated in silence on the floor. When required to tell my meditations, as it was thought to be of no great importance what we said, I sometimiBs found I had •nothing to tell but a dream, and told that, which passed off very well. Jane Bay appeared to be troubled still more than myself with wandering thoughts ; and when blamed for them, would reply, " I begin very well ; but directly I begin to think of some old friend of mine, and my thoughts go a-wandering from ouo country to another." Sometimes I confessed my falling asleep ; and often the priests have talked to me about the sin of sleeping in time of medita- tion. At last, one of them proposed to me to prick myself with a pin, which I have often done, and so roused myself for a time. My close confinement in the Convent, and the want of oppor- tunities to breathe the open air, might have proved more injurious to me than they did, had I not employed a part of my tlmo in more active labours than those of sewing, &c., to which I was chiefly confined. I took part occasionally in some of tho heav}'^ work, as washing, &o. The events which I am now to relate, occurred about five months after ray admission into the Oonvent as a nun ; but I cannot fix the time with precision, as I know not of any thi;ig which took place in the world about the same period. The circumstance I clearly remember; but, as I liave elsewhere remarked, we were not accustomed to keep any account of time. Information was given to us one day, that another novice waa to be admitted among us ; and we were required to remember and mention her often in our prayers, that she might have faith- fulness in the service of her holy spouse. No information was given us concerning her beyond this fact : not a word about h^r BLACK NUNNKRY 95 age, name, or nation. On all siinilar occasions the same course was pursned, and all that the nuns ever learnt concerning one another was what they might discover by being together, aid which usually amounted to little or nothing. When ihe day of her admission arrived, though I did not witness the ceremony in the chapel, it was a gratification to us all on one account, because we were all released from labour, and enjoyed a great recreation-day. Our new sister, when she was introduced to the "holy" pociety of us " saints," proved to be young, of about the middle size, and very good-looking for a Canadian ; for I soon ascer- tained that she was one of my own countrywomen. The Ca:ia- dian females are generally not handsome. I never learnt her name, nor any thing of her history. She had chosen Saint Martin for her nun name. She was admitted in the morning, and appeared melancholy all day. This I observed was always the case ; and the remarks made by others, led mo to believe that they, and all they had seen, had felt sad and miserable for a longer or shorter time. Even the Superior, as it may bo recollected, confessed to me that she had experienced the same feelings when she was received. When bedtinie arrived, she proceeded to the chamber with the rest of ns, and was assigned a bed on the side of the room opposite my own, and a little beyond. The nuns were all soon in bed, the usual silence ensued, and I was making my customary mental prayer and composing myself to sleep, when I heard the most piercing and heart-rending shrieks proceed from our new comrade. Every nnn seemed to rise as if by one impulse, for no one could hear each sounds, especially in such total silence, without being greatly excited. A general noise succeeded, for many voices •ipoke together, uttering cries of surprise, compassion, or fear. It was in vain for the night-watch to expect silence : for once we forgot rules and penances, and gave vent to our feelings, and she could do nothing but call for the Superior. Strange as it may seem, mad Jane Ray, who found an opportunity to make herself heard for an instant, uttered an exclamation in English, which so far from expressing any sympathy for the sufferer, seemed to b6tray feelings hardened to the last degree against oonscienoe and 96 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. sLarae. This caused a laugh among poine of those who under- stood her, and had become hardened to their own trials, and of course in a great measure to those of others. I heard a man's voice mingled with the cries and shrieks of the nun. Father Quiblier, of the Seminary, I had felt confident, was in the Superior's room at the time when we retired ; and several .of the nuns afterward assured me that it was he. The Superior soon made her appearance, and in a harsh manner commanded silence. I heard her threaten gagging her, and thou say, " You are no better than anybody else, and if you do not. obey, you shall be sent to the cells." One young girl was,- taken, into the Convent during my abode there, under peculiar circumstances. I was acquainted with the whole affair, as I was employed to act a part in it. Among the novices, was a young lady of about seventeen, the daughter of an old rich Oanadian. She had been remarkable for nothing that I know of, except the liveliness of her disposi- tion. The Superior once expressed to us a wish to have her take the veil, though the girl herself had never had any such intention, that I knew of. Why the Superior wished to receive her, I could only conjecture. One reason might have been, that she expected to receive a considerable sum from her father. She was, however, strongly desirous of Having the girl in our com- munity, and one day said : " Let us take her in by a trick, and tell the old man she felt too humble to take the veil in public." Our plans then being laid, the unsuspecting girl was induced by us, in sport, as we told her, and made her believe, to put on such a splendid robe as I had worn on my admission, and to pass through some of the ceremonies of taking the veil. After this, she was seriously inrormed, that she was considered as having entered the Gonvent in earnest, and must henceforth bury her- self to the world, as she would never be allowed to leave it. TVo put on her a nun's dress, though she wept, and refused, aud expressed the greatest repugnance. The Superior threatened, and promised, and flattered, by turns, until the poor girl had to submit ; but her appearance long showed that she was a nun only bj compulsion. In obedience to the directions of the Superior, we exerted who under- rials, and of d shrieks of elt confident, retired; and jv^as he. The larsh manner her, and thou if you do not ing iny ahode nted with the seventeen, the an remarkable of her disposi- 3hto have her ■ had any such ihed to receive lave been, that )r father. She ,rl in our corn- by a trick, and reil in public." •Iwas induced teve, to put on Lob, and to pass )il. After this, jred as having forth buryher- lo leave it. We id refused, and tor threatened, >oor girl had to she -was a nun lor, we BLACK NUNNERY, m ourselves to make her contented, especially when she was first received, when we got round her, and told her we had felt so for a time, but having since become acquainted with the happi- ness of a nun's life, were perfectly content and would never bo willing to leave the Convent. An exception seemed to be made in her favor, in one respect : for *I believe no criminal attempt was made upon her, until she had been some time an inmate of the nunnery. Soon after her receptioa, or rather her forcible entry into the Oonvent, her fatlier called to make inquiry about his daughter. The Superior first spoke with him herself, and then called us to repeat her plausible story, which I did with accuracy. If I had wished to say any thing else, I never should have dared. We told the foolish old man, that his daughter, whom we all loved, had long desired to become a Nun, but had been too humble to wish to appear before spectators, and had, at her own desire, been favored with a private admission into the commu- nity. The benefit conferred upon himself and hb family, by this act of self-consecration, I reminded him, must be truly great and valuable ; as every family which furnishes a priest, or a nnn, is justly looked upon as receiving the pecnliiyr favor of heaven on thfit account. The old Canadian firmly believed every word I was f<»ced to tell him, took the event as a great blessing, and eicpressed the greatest readiness to pay more than the customary fee to the Oonvent, After the interview, he withdrew, promis- ing soon to return and pay a handsome sum to the convent, which he performed with all despatch, and the greatest cheerfhlness. The poor girl never heard that her father I^d tidcen the trouble to call to see her, much less did she know any thing of the imposition passed upon him. She remained in the Convent when I left it. The youngest girl who ever took the veil of onr sisterhood, was only fourteen years of age, and oonsidered very pious. She lived bat a short time. I was told that she waa ill-treated by the priestBi and believe her death was in oonseqnenoe. %", ff :.■"■' ,: I *1 ■1 I >r| m. •Mr) ■ I' I i ■ H^ M '1 I 1*1 1-4:1 m r. !■ '!■■ i:;!-).! UH s i m 11 fit -'• if |i It m k m .It ill J ill I ii' 98 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. CHAPTER XV. Lv W?! Influencing Novices— Difficulty of convincing persona from the United States- Tale of the Bishop in the City— The Bishop in the Convent- The Prisoners in the Cells— Practice in Singing— Narratives— Jane Ray's Hymns— The Superior's best Trick. It was considered a great duty to exert ourselves to influence novices in favor of the Eoman Catholic religion ; and different nuns, were, at different times, charged to do what they could, by conversation, to make favourable impressions on the minds of some, who were particularly indicated to us by the Superior. I often heard it remarked, that those who were influenced with the greatest diflSculty, were young ladies from the United States ; and on some of those, great exertions were made. Cases in which citizens of the States were said to have been converted to the Eoman Catholic faith, were sometimes spoken of, and always as if they were considered highly important. The Bishop, as we were told, was on the public square, on the day of an execution, when, as be said, a stranger looked at him in some peculiar manner, which made him confidently believe God intended to have him converted by his means. When he went home, he wrote a letter for him, and the next day found him again in the same place, and gave him the letter, which led to his becoming a Boman Catholic. This man, it was added, proved to be a citizen of the States. The Bishop, as I have remarked, was not very dignified on all occasions, and sometimes acted in such a manner as would not have appeared well in public. One day I saw him preparing for mass ; and because he had some difficulty in getting on his robe, showed evident signs of anger. One of the nuns remarked : " The Bishop is going to perform a passionate mass." Some of the others exclaimed: BLACK NUNNERY 99 m "Are you uot ashamed to speak so of my lord!" And she was rewarded with a penance. But it might be hoped that the Bishop would be free from the crimes of which I have declared so many priests to have been guilty. I am far from entertaining such charitable opinions of Lira ; and I had good reasons, after a time. I was often required to sleep on a sofa, in the room of the present Superior, as I may have already mentioned. One night, not Jong after I was first introduced there, for that purpose, and within the first twelve months of my weai'ing the veil, having retired as usual, at about half-past nine, not long after we had got into bed, the alarm-bell from without, which hangs over the Superior's bed, was rung. She told me to see who was there; and going down, I heard the signal given, which I have before mentioned, a peculiar kind of hissing sound made through the teeth. I answered with a low, "Hum — hum ;" and then opened the door. It was Bishop Lartique, the present Bishop of Montreal. He said to me, " Are you a N'ovice or a Received?" meaning a Received nun. I answered a "Received." He then requested me to conduct him to the Superior's room, which I did. He went to the bed, drew the curtains behind him, and I lay down again upon the sofa, until morning, when the Superior called me, at an early hour, about daylight, and directed me to show him the door, to which I conducted him, and he took his departure. I continued to visit the cellar frequently, to carry up coal for the fires, without anything more than a general impression that there were two nuns, somewhere imprisoned in it. One day while there on my usual errand, I saw a nun standing on the right of the cellar, in front of one of the cell doors I had before observed; she was apparently engaged with something within. This attracted my attention. The door appeared to close in a small recess, and was fastened with a stout iron bolt on the out- side, the end of which was secured by being let into a hole in the stone-work which formed the posts. The door, which was of wood, was sunk a few inches beyond the stone-work, which rose and formed an arch overhead. Above the bolt was a small wM mi 100 AWFUL DISOLOSURES. window sapplied with a fine grating, which swung open, a small bolt having been removed from it, on the outside. The nun I had observed seemed to be whispering with some person within, through the little window : but I hastened to get my coal, and left the cellar, presuming that was the prison. "When I visited the place again, being alone, I ventured to the spot, determined to learn the truth, presuming that the imprisoned nuns, of whom the Superior had told me on my admission, were confined there. I spoke at the window where I had seen the nun standing, and heard a voice reply in a whisper. The aperture was so small, and the place so dark, that I could see nobody ; but I learnt that a poor wretch was confined there a prisoner. I feared that I might be discovered, and after a few words, which I thought could do no harm, I withdrew. My curiosity was now alive, to learn every thing I could about so mysterious a subject. I made a few inquiries of Saint Xavier, who only informed me that they were punished for refusing to obey the Superior, Bishop, and Priests. I afterward found that the other nuns were acquainted with the fact I had just discovered. All I could learn, however, was, that the prisoner in the cell whom I had spoken with, and another in the cell just beyond, had been confined there several years without having been taken out ; but their names, connexions, offences, and everything else relating to them, I could never lewn, and am still as ignorant of as ever. Some conjectured that they had refused to comply with some of the rules of the Convent or requisitions of the Superior; others, that they were heiresses whose property was desired for the convent, and who would not consent to sign deeds of it. Some of the nuns informed me, that the severest of their sufferings arose from fear of superna- tural beings. I often spoke with one of them in passing near their cells, when on errands in the cellar, but never ventured to stop long, or to press my inquiries very far. Besides, I found her reserved, and little disposed to converse freely, a thing I could not wonder at when I considered her situation, and the characters of persons around her. She spoke like a woman in feeble health, and of 'i\ ' BLACK NUNN ERY 101 broken spirits. I occasionally saw other nuns speaking to tliem^ particularly at meal-times, when they were regularly furnished with food, which was such as we ourselves ate. Their cells were occasionally cleaned and then the doors were opened. I never looked into them, but was informed that the ground was their only floor. I presumed that they were furnish- ed with straw to lie upon, as I always saw a quantity of old straw scattered about that part of the cellar, after the cells had been cleansed. I once inquired of one of them, whether they could converse together, and she replied that they could, through a small opening between their cells, which I could not see. I once inquired of the one I spoke with in passing, whether she wanted anything, and she replied, " Tell Jane Bay I want to see her a moment if she can slip away." When I went up I took an opportunity to deliver my message to Jane, who con- certed with me a signal to be used in future, in case a similar request should be made through me. This was a sly wink at her with one eye, accompanied with a slight toss of my head. She then sought an opportunity to visit the cellar, and was soon able to hold an interview with the poor prisoners, without being noticed by any one but myself. I afterward learnt that mad Jane Ray was not so mad, but she could feel for those miserable beings, and carry through measures for their comfort. She wouldwOften visit them with sympathizing words, and, when necessary, conceal part of her food while at table, and secretly convey it into their dungeons. Sometimes we would combine for such an object ; and I have repeatedly aided her in thus obtaining a larger supply of food than they had been able to obtain from othei's. I frequently thought of the two nuns confined in the cells, and occasionally heard something said about them, but very little. Whenever I visited the cellar and thought it safe, I went up to the first of them and spoke a word or two, and usually got some brief reply, without ascertaining that any particular change took place with either of them. The one with whom I ever conver- sed, spoke English perfectly well, and French I thought as well. I supposed she must have been well educated, for I could not tell which was her native language. I remember that she fr©- ^":'] ;rt it* wm I tin* 'ft'i:! 102 AWFUL DISCLOSURES quently used these words when I wished to say more to her, and which alone showed that she was constantly afraid of pun- ishment : " Oh, there's somebody coming — do go away 1" I have been told that the other prisoner also spoke Euglish. It was impossible for me to form any certain opinion about the size or appearance of those two miserable creatures, for their cells were perfectly dark, and I never caught the Slightest glimpse even of their faces. It is probable they were women not above the middle size, and my reason for this presumption is the fol- lowing: I was sometimes appointed to lay out the clean clothes for all the nuns in the Convent on Saturday evening, and was al- ways directed to lay by two suits for the prisoners. Particular orders were given to select the largest sized garments for seve- ral tall nuns ; but nothing of the kind was ever said in relation to the clothes for those in the cells. I had not been long a veiled nun, before I requested of the Sti- perior permission to confess to the " Saint Bon Pasteur," (Holy;, Good Shepherd,) that is, the mysterious and nameless nun whom I had heard of while a novice. I knew of several others who had confessed to her at different times, and of some who had sent their clothes to be touched by her when they were sick; and I felt a desire to unburden my heart of certain things, which I was loath to acknowledge to the Superior, or any of the priests. The Superior made me wait a little, until she could lu^rtain whether the "Saint Bon Pasteur" was ready to admit jae; and after a time returned, and told me to enter the old nfins* room. That apartment has twelve beds, arranged like the berths of a ship by threes ; and as each is broad enough to receive two per- sons, twenty-four may be lodged there, which was about the number of old nuns in the Convent during the most of my stay in it. Near an opposite corner of the apartment was a large glass case, with no appearance of a door, or other opening, la any part of it : and in that case stood the venerable nun, in the dress of the community, with her thick veil spread over her face, so as to conceal it entirely. She was standing, for the place did not allow room for sitting, and moved a little, which was the only sign of life, as she did not speak. I fell upon my knees be- fore her, and began to confess some of my imperfections, which :N':i BLACK NUNN ERY. 103 : k lay heavy upon my mind, imploring her aid and iatercession, that I uiiijht be delivered from them. She appeared to listen to me with patience, but still never returned a word in reply. I became much afiected as I went on, and at length began to weep bitterly ; and Avhen I withdrew, was in tears. It seemed to ma that my heart was remarkably relieved after this exercise, and all the requests I had made, I found, as I believed, strictly ful- filled. I often, afterward, visited the old nuns' room for the same purpose, and with similar results, so that my belief in the sanctity of the nameless nun, and my regard for her intercession were unbounded. What is remarkable, though I repeatedly was sent into that room to dust it, or to put it in order, I remarked that the glass case was vacant, and no signs were to be found either of the nun or of the way by which she had left it ; so that a solemn con- clusion rested upon my mind, that she had gone on one of her frequent visits to heaven. A priest would sometimes come in the daytime to teach ns to sing, and this was done with some parade or stir, as if it were i^4considered,or meant to be considered as a thing of importance. The instructions, however, were entirely repetitions of the words and tunes, nothing being taught even of the first principles of the science. It appeared to me, that although hymns alone weMsung, the exercise was chiefly designed for our amusement, • to rmb oui^* spirits a little, which were apt to become depressed. Mad Jlme Bay certainly usually treated the whole thing as a matter of sport, and often excited those of us who understood English to a great degree of mirth. She had a very fine voice, J which was so powerful as generallj'^ to be heard above the rest. Sometimes she would be silent when the other nuns began; and the Superior would often call out, " Jane Ray, you don*t ^ sing." She always had some trifling excuse ready, and common- ly appeared unwilling to join the rest. After being urged or commanded by the Superior, she would then strike up some English song, or profane parody, which was rendered ten times more ridiculous by the ignorance of the Lady Superior and the nugority of the nuns. I cannot help M I' !l 4'; il m 104 AWFUL DISOLOSURIB. laughing now when I remember how she used to stand with perfect composnre and sing, " I wish I was married and nothing to rue. With plenty of money and nothing to do.*' " Jane Ray, yon don't sing right," the Superior would exclaim. " Oh," she would reply, with perfect coolness, " that is the English for, * Seigneur Dieu de clemenee, Ref ois ce grand p6cbeur ;" * and, as sung by her, a person ignorant of the language would naturally be imposed upon. It was extremely difficult for me to conceal my laughter. I have always had greater exertion to make in repressing it than most other persons ; and mad Jane Bay often took advantage of this. Saturday evening usually brought with it much unpleasant work for some of us. We received the Sacrament every Sun- day ; and in preparation for it, on Saturday evening we asked pardon of the Superior and of each other ^^ for the scandal we had caused since we last received the Sacrament," and then asked the Superior's permission to receive it on the following day. She inquired of each nun who necessarily asked her permission, whether she, naming her as Saint somebody, had conceak^any sin that should hinder her from receiving it ; and if thyf^wer was in the negative, she granted her permission. ^ On Saturdays we were catechised by a priest, being assembled in a community-room. He sat on the right of the door in a choir. He often told us stories, and frequently enlarged on the duty of enticing novices into the nunnery. " Do you not feel happy," he would say, " now that you are safely out of the world, and sure of heaven ? But remember how many poor people are yet ^ in the world. Every novice you influence to the black veil, will add to your honour in heaven. Tell them how happy you are." The Superior played one trick while I was in the Convent, which always passed for one of the most admirable she ever carried into execution. We were pretty good judges in a case of this kind, for, as may be presumed, we were rendered BliAOK NUNNERY ia5 familiar witli the arts of deception under so accomplished a teacher. Tliero was an ornament on hand in the nnnuery, of an extra- ordinary kind, which was prized at ten ponnds ; but it had been made and exposed to view so bng, tliat it became damaged and quite unsaleable. We were one day visited by an old priest from the country, who was evidently somewhat intoxicated; and as he withdrew to go to his lodgings, in the Seminary, where tlie country priests often stay, the Superior conceived a plan for disposing of the old ornament, " Come," said she, " we will send it to the old priest, and swear he has bought it !^' We all approved of the ingenious device, for it evidently might be classed among the pious frauds wo had so often had recom- mended to US both by precept and example ; and the ornament was sent to him the next morning, as his property when paid for. He soon oame to the Convent, and expressed the greatest sur- prise that he had been charged with purchasing such a thing, for which he had no need and no desire. The Superior heard this declaration with patience, but politely insisted that it was a fair bargain ; and we then surrounded the old priest, with the strongest assertions that such was the fact, and that nobody would ever have thought of his purchasing it unless he had expressly engaged to take it. The poor old man was enti|i||f put down. He was certain of the truth : but what colild ■he ido^resist or disprove a direct falsehood pronounced by the Superior of a Convent, and sworn to by all her holy nuns ? He finally expressed his conviction that we were right : he was compelled to pay his money. i','!. -J^ \i il m 6* 100 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. CHAPTER XVI. Fruqdency of (ho Priests' Visits to the Nunnery— Their Freedom and Grimes — DifS- culty of learning their Names — Their Holy Retreat — Objections in our minds- Means used to counteract Conscience — Ingenious Arguments. Some of the priests from the Seminary were in the nunnery every day and night, and often several at a time. I Lave seen nearly all of them at different times, though there are about one hundred and fifty in the district of Montreal. There was a dif- ference in their conduct ; though I believe every one of them was guilty of licentiousness ; while not one did I ever see who maintained a character any way becoming the profession of a priest. Some were gross and degraded in a degree which few of my readers can ever have imagined ; and I should be unwill- ing to offend the eye, and corrupt the heart of any one, by an account of their words and actions. Few imaginations can con- ceive deeds so abominable as they practised, and often required of some of the poor women, under the fear of severe punish- ments, and even of death. I do not hesitate to say wyJi the strongest confidence, that although some of the nuns beoaine lost to every sentiment of virtue and honour, especially ^e from the Goi}gregational Nunnery whom I have before mentioned. Saint Patrick, the greater part of them loathed the practices to which they were compelled to submit by the Superior and priests, who kept them under so dreadful a bondage. Some of the priests whom I saw I never knew by name, and ^ the names of others I did not leurn for a time, and at last learntlr/ only by accident. They were always called " Mon pere," my father ; but some- times, when they had purchased something in the ornament- room, they would give their real names, with directions where it should be sent. Many names, thus learnt, and in other ways, were whispered about from nun to nun, and became prdtty BLACK KUNNERY. lot H generally known. Several of the priests, some of us bad seen before we entered the Couvt iit. Many tbings of wbicli I speak, from the nature of tbe case, must necessarily rest cliiefly upon my (m a word, until further evidence can be obtaiii'^tl: but thero are souio facts for wliicb I can appeal to the knowled^'O of others. It i« commonly known in Montreal tbat some of the priests occasionally withdraw from their customary employments, and are not to be seen for Home time, it being understood that they have retired for religious study, meditation and devotion, for the improveuiont of their hearts. Sometimes they are thus withdrawn from the world fur weeks : but there is no fixed period. This was a fact I knew before I took the veil; for it is a frequent subject of remark, that such or such a Father is on a "holy retreat." This is a terra which conveys the idea of a religious seclusion from the world for satred purposes. On the re-appearance of the priest after such a period, in the church or the streets, it is natural to feel a peculiar impres! '' 114 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. that such was the fact. The priests' farm is a fine tract of land helonging to the Seminary, a little distance from the city, near the Lachine road, with a large old-fashioned edifice upon it. I happened to he in the Superior's room on the day alluded to, when she made some remark on the plainness and poverty of her furniture. I replied, that she was not proud, and could not be dissatisfied on that account; she answered — " No ; but if I was, how much superior is the furniture at tho priests' farm I the poorest room there is furnished better than the best of mine." I was one day mending the fire in the Superior's room, when a priest was conversing with her on the scarcity of money ; and I heard him say, that very little money was received by the priests for prayers, but that the principal part came with pen- ances and absolutions. One of the most remarkable and unaccountable things that happened in the Convent, was the disappearance of the old Superior. She had performed her customary part during the day, and had acted and appeared just as usual. She had shown no symptoms of lU health, met with no particular difficulty in conducting business, and no agitation, anxiety or gloom, had been noticed in her conduct. We had no reason to suppose that during that day she had expected anything particular to occur, any more than the rest of us. After the close of our customary labours, and evening lecture, she dismissed us to retire to bed, exactly in her usual manner. The next morning the bell rung we sprang from our bed, hurried on our clothes as usual, and proceeded to the community-room in double line, to commence the morning exercises. There, to our surprise, we found Bishop Lartigue; but the Superior was nowhere to be seen. The Bishop soon addressed us, instead of her, and informed us, that a lady near him, whom he presented to us, was now the Superior of the Convent, and enjoined upon us the same respect and obedi- ence which we had paid to her predecessor. The lady he introduced to^us was one of our oldest nuns, Saint Du * * * *, a very large, fleshy woman, with swelled limbs, which rendered her very slow in walking, and often gn"o her great distress. Not a word was dropped from which ,.\^ could BLACK NUNNERT. 115 conjecture the cause of this change, nor of the fate of the old Superior. I took tlie first opportunity to inquire of one of tlie nuns, whom I dared talk to, what had hecome of her ; but I found thera as ignorant as mysell', though suspicious that she had been murdered by the orders of the Bisliop. Kever did I obtain any light on her mysterious disappearance. I am con- fident, however, that if the Bishop wished to get rid of her pri- vately and by foul means, he had ample opportunities and power at his command. Jane Ray, as usual, could not allow such an occurrence to pass by without intimating her own suspicions more plainly than any other of the nuns would have dared to do. She spoke out one day, in the community-room, and said, " I'm going to have a hunt in the cellar for my old Superior." "Hush, Jane Ray 1" exclaimed some of the nuns, "you'll be punished." " My mother used to tell me," replied Jane, " never to be afraid of the face of a man." It caqnot be thought strange that we were superstitious. Some were more easily terrified than others, by unaccountable sights and sounds ; but all of us believed in the power and occa- sional appearance of spirits, and were ready to look for them at almost any time. I have seen several instances of alarm caused by such superstition, and have experienced it myself more than once. I was one day sitting mending aprons, beside one of the old nuns, in a community-room, while the litanies were repeat- ing ; as I was very easy to laugh. Saint Ignace or Agnes, came in, walked up to her with much agitation, and began to whisper in her ear. She usually talked but little, and that made mo more curious to know what was the matter with her. I over- heard her say to the old nun, in much alarm, that in the cellar from which she had just returned, she had heard the most dreadful groans that ever came from any being. This was enough to give me uneasiness. I could not account for the appearance of an evil spirit in any part of the Convent, for I had been assured that the only one ever known there, was that of the nun who had died with an unconfessed sin, and that others were kept at a distance by the holy water that was rather pro- fusely used in dififerent parts of the nunnery. Still, I presumed » 4m 1 '•1 Jlifii f I 1 yr. 'i I M m^n ? !)■ I '••as ;,. ^^^^Hm ' i III I^Blm i i i 1 r! iiillllll a ! ij'ii 116 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. that the sounds heard by Saint Ignace must have proceeded from some devil, and I felt great dread at the thought of visiting the cellar again. I determined to seek further information of the terrified nun ; but when I addressed her on the subject, at recreation-time, the first opportunity I could find, she replied, that I was always trying to make her break silence, and walked off to another group in the room, so that I could obtain no satisfaction. It is remarkable that in our nunnery, we were almost entirely cut off from the means of knowing anything, even of each other. There were many nuns whom I know nothing of to this day, after having been in the same rooms with them every day and and night for many months. There was a nun, whom I suppos- ed to be in the Convent, and' whom I was anxious to learn some- thing about from the time of my entrance as a novice ; but I never was able to loam anything concerning her, not even whether she was in the nunnery or not, whether alive or dead. She was the daughter of a rich family, residing at Point auz Trembles, of whom I had heard my mother speak before I enter- ed the Oonvent. The name of her family I think was Lafayette, and she was thought to be from Europe. She was known to have taken the black veil; but as I was not acquainted with the name of the Saint she had assumed, and I could not describe her in " the world," all my inquiries and observations proved entire- ly in vain. I had heard before my entrance into the Oonvent, that one of the nuns had made her escape from it during the last war, and once inquired about her of the Superior. She admitted that such was the fact ; but I was never able to learn any particulars concerning her name, origin, or manner of escape. WW, BLACK NUN NERT. in CHAPTER XVIII. Disappearance of Nuns— St. Pierre— Oags— My temporary Confinement In a Cell —The Cholera Season — How to avoid it— Occupations in the Convent during the Pestilence- Manufacture of Wax Candles — The Election, Riots— Alarm among the Nuns— Preparations for defence — Penances. I AM unable to say how many nuns disappeared while I was in the Convent. There were several. One was a young lady cal- led St. Pierre, I think, but am not certain of her name. There were two nuns by this name. I had known her as a novice with me. She had been a novice about two years and a half before I became one. She was rather large without being tall, and had rather dark hair and eyes. She disappeared unac- countably, and nothing was said of her except what I heard in whispers from a few of the nuns, as we found moments when we could speak unobserved. Some told me they thought she must have left the Convent ; and I might have supposed so, had I not some time afterward found some of her things lying about, which she would, in such a case, doubtless have taken with her. I never had known any thing more of her than what I could observe or conjecture. I had always, however, the idea that her parents or friends were wealthy, for she sometimes received clothes and other things, which were very rich. Another nun, named Saint Paul, died suddenly; but as in other cases, we knew so little, or rather were so entirely ignor- ant of the cause and circumstances, that we could only conject> ure ; and being foi bidden to converse freely on that or any other subject, thought but little about it. I have mentioned that a number of veiled nuns thus mysteriously disappeared during my residence among them. I cannot, perhaps, recall them all, but lam confident there were as many as five, and I think more. All that m .1 : (./• .. I 1 I i I. I i. ■ :,:.: I I 1 1 1 I'i 1 1' 1^ B (|jf\iq m Niijlii Willi 118 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. we knew in such cases was, that one of dnv number who had ap- peared as iMual when last observed, was nowhere to be seen, and never was again. Mad Jane Ray, on several such occasions, would indulge in her bold, and, as we thought, dangerous re- marks. She had intimated that some of those, who had been for a time in the Convent, were by some means removed to make way for new ones ; and it was generally the fact, that the disappearance of one and tiie introduction of another into our community, were nearly at the same time. I have repeatedly heard Jane Ray say, with one of her significant looks, " When you appear, somebody else disappears !" It is unpleasant enough to distress or torture one*s selt ; but there is something worse in being tormented by others, especially where they resort to force, and show a pleasure in compelling you, and leave you no hope of escape, or opportunity to resist. I had seen the gags repeatedly in use, and sometimes ap;)Ued with a roughness which seemed rather inhuman ; but it 'm one thing to see and another thing to feel. There were some of the old nuns who seemed to take pleasure in oppressing those who fell under their displeasure. They were ready to recommend or resort to compulsory measures, and ever ready to run for the gags. These were kept in one of the community-rooms, in a drawer between two closets ; and there a stock of about fifty of them was always in deposite. Sometimes a aumber of nuns would prove refractory at a time ; and I have seen battles com- menced in which several appeared on both sides. The disobe- dient were, however, soon overpowered : and to prevent their screams from being heard beyond the walls, gagging commenced immediately. I have seen half a dozen lying gagged and bound at once. I have been subjected to the same state of involuntary silence more than once ; for sometimes I became excited to a state of desperation by the measures used against me, and then conducted in a manner perhaps not less violent than some others. My hands had been tied behind me, and a gag put into my mouth, some- times with such force and rudeness as to lacerate my lips and cause the blood to flow freely. Treatment of this kind is apt to teach submission, and many BLACK NUNNERY. 119 u times I have acquiesced under orders received, or wishes ex- pressed, Avith a fear of a recurrence to some severe measures. One day I had incurred tlie anger of the Superior in a greater degree than usual, and it was ordered that I should be taken to one of the cells. I was taken by some of the nuns, bound and gagged, carried down the stairs in the cellar, and laid upon the flcor. Kot long afterward I induced one of the nuns to request the Superior to come down and see me ; and on making some acknowledgment I was released. I will, however, relate this story rather more in detail. On that day I had been engaged with Jane Bay, in carrying into effect a plan of revenge upon another person, when I fell under the vindictive spirit of some of the old nuns, and su£fered severely. The Superior ordered me to the cells, and a scene of violence commenced which I will not attempt to describe, nor the precise circumstances which led to it. Suffice it to say, that after exhausting my strength, by resisting as long as I could against several nuns, I had my bands drawn behind my back, a leathern band passed first round my thumbs, then round my hands, and then round my waist, and fastened. This was drawn so tight that it cut through the flesh of my thumbs, making wounds, the scars of which still remain. A gag was then forced into my mouth, not indeed so violently as it sometimes was, but roughly enough ; after which I was taken by main force, and carried down into the cellar, across it almost to the opposite extremity, and brought to the last of the second range of cells on the left hand. The door was opened, and I was thrown in with violence, and left alone, the door being immediately closed and bolted on the outside. The bare ground was under me, cold and hard ap*if it had been beaten down even. I lay still, in the position In which I had fallen, as it would have been difficult for me to move, confined as I was, and exhausted by my exertions ; an(]/ the shock of my fall, and my wretched state of desperation ai^d fear, disinclined me from any further attempt. I was in jilmost total darkness, there being nothing perceptible except a /slight glimmer of light which came in through the little window i / far above me. / How long I remained in that condition I can only conjecture. 1/ m Wi,fW7i,/'u n,! I '•!. 120 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. It seemed to me a long time, and must have been two or three Lours. I did not move, expecting to die there, and in a state of distress which I cannot describe, from the tight bandage about 'my hands, and the gag holding my jaws apart at their greatest extension. I am confident I must have died before morning, if, as I then expected, I had been left there all night. By-aud-by, however, the bolt was drawn, the door opened, and Jane Kay spoke to me in a tone of kindness. She had taken an opportu- nity to slip into the cellar unnoticed on purpose to see me. Sho unbound the gag, and took it out of my mouth, and told mo she would do any thing to get me out of my dungeon. If she had had the bringing of me down, she would not have thrust mo su brutally, and she would be revenged on those who had. SLo offered to throw herself upon her knees before the Superior aud beg her forgiveness. To this I would not consent ; but told her to ask the Superior to come to me, as I wished to speak to her. This I had no idea she would condescend to do ; but Jane had not been gone long before the Superior came, and asked if I had repented in the sight of God for what I had done. I replied in the affirmative ; and after a lecture of some length on the pain I had given the Virgin Mary by my conduct, she asked whether I was willing to ask pardon of all the nuns for the scandal I had caused them by my behaviour. To this I made no objection; and I was then released from my prison and m j bonds, went up to the community-room, and kneeling before all the sbters in succession begged the forgiveness and prayers of each. Among the marks which I still bear of the woundi. received from penances and violence, are the scars left by the belt with which I repeatedly tortured myself, for the mortification of my spirit. These are most distinct on my sidd ; for a^oagh the band, which was four or five inches in breadth, and extended round the waist, was stuck full of sharp iron points in all parts, it was sometimes crowded most against my side, by restiDg in my chair, and the wounds were nsually deeper there than any- where else. My thumbs were several times cut severely by the tigjii draw- ing of the band used to confine my arms, and the scars ara ftiU visible npon them. \i DLAOK NUNNERY The rough gngging which I several times endured wounded iny lips very much ; for it was common, in that operation, to thruHt the gag hard against the teeth, and catch one or both tlio lips, whicli were sometimes cut. The object was to stop the screams made by the offender as soon as possible ; and some of the old nuns delighted in tormenting us. A gag was once forced into my iMOUth which had a large splinter upon it, and this cut through my under lip, inrront, leaving to this day a scar about half an inch long. The same lip was several times wounded, as well as the other ; but one day worse than ever, when a narrow piece was cut off from the left side of it, by being pinched between the gag and the under fore-teeth ; and this has left an inequality in it which is still very observable. One of the most shocking stories I heard of events that had occurred in the nunnery before my aqnalntance with it, was the following, which was told me by Jane. What is uncommon, I can fix the date when I heard it. It was on New-Tear's day, 1834. The ceremonies, customary in the early part of that day, had been performed ; after mass, in the morning, the Superior had shaken hands with all the nuns, and given us her blessing, for she was said to have received power from heaven to do so only once a year, and then on the first day of the year. Besides this, cakes, raisins, &o. are distributed to the nuns on that day. While in the community-room, T had taken a seat just withia the cupboard-door, where I often found a partial shelter from observation with Jane, when a conversation incidentally began between us. Our practice often was, to take places there beside one of the old nans, awaiting the time when she would go away for a little while, and leave ns partially screened from the observa- tion of others. On that occasion, Jane and I were left for a time alone ; when after some discourse on sidcide, she remarked, that three nuns once killed themselves in the Convent. This happened, she said, not long after her reception, and I knew, therefore, that it was several years before, for she had been received a considerable time before I had become a novice. Three young ladies, she informed me, took the veil together, or very near the same time, I am not certain which. I know they have four robes in the Oonvent, to be worn during the ceremony 6 ' \i III , ■) MlTjq.|! ■'I n-i'ii »y,j \W\mA : I ml ill iimn ii! 122 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. of taking the yeil ; but I have never seen more than one of them used at a time. Two of tlie new nuns were sisters, and the other their cousin. They hud been received but a few days, when information was given one morning that they had been found dead in their beds, amid a profusion of blood. Jane Ray said, she saw their corpses, and tljat they appeared to have killed themselves, by opening veins in their anna with a kflfe they had obtained, and all had bled to death together. "What was extraordinary, Jane Ray added, that she had heard no noise, and that she believed no- body had suspected that any thing was wrong during the niglit. Saint Hypolite, however, had stated, that she found them in the morning, after the other nuns had gone to prayers, lying lifeless in their beds. For some reason or other, their death was not made public ; but their bodies, instead of being exhibited in full dress in the chapel, and afterward interred with solemnity beneath it, were taken unceremoniously into the cellar, and thrown into the hole I have so often mentioned. There were a few instances, and only a few, in which we knew any tiling that was happening in the world ; and even then our knowledge did not extend out of the city. I can recall but three occasions of this kind. Two of them were when the cholera prevailed in Montreal; and the other was the election riots. The appearance of the cholera, in both seasons of its ravages, gave us abundance of occupation. Indeed, we were more borne down by hard labor at those times, than ever before or afterward during my stay. The Pope had given early notice that the burn- ing of wax candles would aflFord protection from the disease, be- cause so long as any person continued to burn one, the Virgin Mary would interce cholera ; iisease ex- . which it , city was )m day to ^ however, aovements own satis- stored in of it was »n of the Irts of this is a great tpearance, •epetition ; submitted il belief in IS I recol- ^s ear ; for tpelled to of severe my duties, beling and Ineeling on BLACK NUNNERY. 125 hard peos, and walking with them in the shoes. We had repeatedly to walk on our knees through the subterranean passsage, leading to the Congregational Nunnery ; and sometimes to eat our meals with a rope round our necks. Sometimes wo were fed only with such things as we most disliked. Garlic was given to me on this account, because I had a strong antipathy against it. Eels were repeatedly given to some of us, because we felt an unconquerable repugnance to them, on account of reports we had heard of their feeding on dead carcasses, in the river St. Lawrence. It was no uncommon thing for us to be required to drink the water in which the Superior had washed her feet. Sometimes we were required to brand ourselves with a hot iron, so as to leave scars ; at other times to whip our naked flesh with several small rods, before a private altar, until we drew blood. I can assert, with the perfect knowledge of the fact, that many of the nuns bear the scars of these wounds. One of onr penances was to stand for a length of time, with our arms extended, in imitation of the Saviour on the cross. The Chemin de la Croix^ or Eoad to the Cross, is, in fact, a penance, though it consists of a variety of prostrations, with the repeti- tion of many prayers, occupying two or three hours. This we had to perform frequently, going into the chapel, and falling before each chapelle in succession, at each time commemorating some particular act or circumstance reported of the Saviour's progress to the place of his crucifixion. Sometimes wo were obliged to sleep on the floor in the winter, with nothing over us but a single sheet ; and sometimes to chew a piece of window- glass to a fine powder, in the presence of the Snperior. We had sometimes to wear leathern belts stuck full of sharp metallic points round our waists, and the upper part of our arms, bound on ho tight that they penetrated the flesh, and drew blood. Some of the penances was so severe, that thej^seemod too much to be endured; and when they wore imposed, the nuns who were to suffer them, sometimes showed the most violent repug- nance. They would often resist, and still oftener express their opposition by exclamations and screams. Never, however, was any noise heard from them, for a long time, for there was a remedy always ready to be applied to cases '.'I' \\ i:-->f r1. . ^il y L a; ' w\ 126 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. I' ! ''■ Ml 11 i of the kind. The gag which was put into the month of the unfortunate Saint F;'ancis, liad heen brought from a place where there were forty or fifty others, of diflferent shapes and sizes* These I have seen in their depository, which is a drawer between two closets, in one of the community-rooms. "Whenever any loud noise was made, one of these instruments was demanded, and gagging commenced at once. I have known many, many instances, and sometimes five or six nuns gagged at once. Some- times they would become so much excited before they could be bound and gagged, that considerable furce was necessary to be exerted ; and I have seen the blood flowing from mouths into which the gag had been thrust with violence. Indeed I ought to know something on this department of nunnery discipline : I have had it tried upon myself, and I can bear witness that it is not only most humiliating and oppressive, but often extremely painful. The mouth is kept forced open, and the straining of the jaws at their utmost stretch, for a con- siderable time, is very distressing. One of the worst punishments which I ever saw inflicted, was that with a cap ; and yet some of the old nuns were permitted to inflict it at their pleasure. I have repeatedly known them to ^o for a cap, when one of our number had transgressed a rule, sometimes though it were a very unimportant one. These caps were kept in a cupboard in the old nuns' room, whence they were brought when wanted. They were small, made of a reddish looking leather, fitted closely to the head, and fastened under the chin with a kind of buckle. It was the common practice to tie the nun's hands behind and gag her before the cap was put on, to prevent noise and resistance. I never saw it worn by any for one moment, with- out throwing them into severe sufferings. If permitted, they would scream ia a most shocking manner; and they always writhed as much as their confinement would allow. I can speak from personal knowledge of this punishment, as I have endured it more than once ; and yet I have no idea of the cause of the pain. I never examined one of the caps, nor saw the inside, for they are always brought and taken away quickly ; but although the first sensation was that of coolness, it was hardly put On my BLACK NUNNERY. 12t head before a violent and indescribable sensation began, like that of a blister, only much more insupportable; and this continued until it was removed. It would produce such an acute pain as to throw us into convulsions, and I think no human being could endure it for an hour. After this punishment we felt its effects through the system for many days. Having once known what it was by experience, I held the cap in dread, and wlien- ever I was condemned to suffer the punishment again, felt ready to do any thing to avoid it. But when tied and gngged, with the cap on my head again, I could only sink upon the floor, and roll about in anguish until it was taken off. This was usually done in about ten minutes, sometimes less, but the pain always continued in my head for several days. I thought that it might take away a person's reason if kept on a much longer time. If I had not been gagged, I am sure I should have uttered awful screams. I have felt the effects for a week. Sometimes fresh cabbage leaves were applied to my head to remove it. Having had no oijportunity to examine my head, I cannot say more. This punishment was occasionally resorted to for very trifling offences, such as washing the hands without permission ; and it was generally applied on the spot, and before the other nuns in the community -room. ^ m^ M 128 ▲ WTUL SIBOLOSVBSi. 1 i I i I i I CHAPTER XIX. The Priests of the District of Montreal have free access to the Blaok Nunnery- Crimes committed and required by them— The Pope's command to commit inde- cent Crimes— Characters of the Old and New Superiors — The timidity of the latter— I began to be employed in the Hospitals — Some accountof them— Warning given me by a sick Nun— Penance by Hanging. I HAYK mentioned before, that the country, as far down as Three Kivers, is furnished with priests by the Seminary of Mon- treal; and that these hundred and fifty men are liable to be occasionally transferred from one station to another. Numbers 6f them are often to be seen in the streets of Montreal, as they may find a home in the Seminary. They are considered as having an equal right to enter the Black Nunnery whenever they please ; and then, according to oar oaths, they have complete control over the nuns. To name all the works of shame of which they are guilty in that retreat, would require much time and space, neither would it be neces- sary to the accomplishment of my object, which is, the publica- tion of but some of their criminality to the world, and the development, in general terms, of scenes thus far carried on in secret within the walls of that Convent, where I was so long an inmate. Secure against detection by the world, they never believed that an eyewitness would ever escape to tell of their crimes, and declare some of their names before the world ; but the time has come, and some of their deeds of darkness must come to the day. I have seen in the nunnery, the priests from more, I presume, than a hundred country places. Admitted for shameful and criminal purposes : from St. Charles, St. Denis, St. Mark's St. Antoine, Chambly, Bertier, St. John's, &c. &c. How unexpected to them will be the discclosures I make' BLACK NUNNERY. 129 Shut up in a place from which there has been tlionght to be but one way of egress, and that the passage to the grave, they con- sidered themselves safe in perpetrating crimes in our presence, and in making us share in their criminality as often as they chose, and conducted more shamelessly than even the brutes. These debauchees would come in witliout ceremony, concealing their naraes, both by night and by day, where the cries and pains of the injured innocence of their victims could never reach the world, for relief or redress for their wrongs ; without remorse or shame, they would glory in torturing, in the most barbarous manner, the feelings of those under their power ; telling us, at the same time, that this mortifying of the flesh was religion, and pleasing to God. We were sometimes invited to put ourselves to voluntary suflferings in a variety of ways, not for a penance, but to show our devotion to God. A priest would sometimes say to us — "Now, which of you have love enough for Jesus Christ to stick a pin through your^ cheeks?" Some of us would signify our readiness, and immediately thrust one through up to the head. Sometimes he would propose that we should repeat the operation several times on the spot ; and the cheeks of a number of nuns would be bloody. There were other acts occasionally proposed and consented to, which I cannot name in a book. Such the Superior would some- times command us to perform ; many of them things not only useless, and unheard of, but loathsome and indecent in the high- est possible degree. How they could ever have been invented I never could conceive. Things were done worse than the ei ti" , exposure of the person, though this was occasionally required of •sevei'al at once, in the presence of priests. The Superior of the Seminary would sometimes come and inform us, that he had received orders from the Pope, to request that those nuns who possessed the greatest devotion and faith, should be requested to perform some particular deeds, which he named or described in our presence, but of which no decent or moral person could ever endure to spekk. I cannot repeat what would injure any ear, not debased to the lowest possible degree. I am bound by a regard to truth, however, to confess, 6* I m ■jf] ■■ 80 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. that deluded women were found among us, who would comply with those requests. There was a great difference between the characters of our old and new Superior, which soon became obvious. The former used to say she liked to walk, because it would prevent her from becoming corpulent. She was, therefore, very active, and con- stantly going about from one part of the nunnery to another, overseeing us at our various employments. I never saw in her any appearance of timidity : she seemed, on the contrary, bold and masculine, and sometimes much more than that, cruel and cold-blooded, in scenes calculated to overcome any common per- son. Such a character she had exhibited at the nmrder of Saint Francis. The new Superior, on the other hand, was so heavy and lame, that she walked with much diflSculty, and consequently exercised a less vigilant oversight of the nuns. She was also of a timid disposition, or else had been overcome by some great fright in her past life ; for she was apt to become alarmed in the night, and never liked to be alone in the dark. She had long per- formed the part of an old nun, which is that of a spy upon the younger ones, and was well known to us in that character, under the name of Ste. Margarite. Soon after her promotion to the station of Superior, she appointed me to sleep in her apartment, and assigned me a sofa to lie upon. One night while, I was asleep, she suddenly threw herself upon me, and exclaimed in great alarm, " Oh ! mon Dieu I mon Dieu I Qu'est que ca ?" Oh, my God I my God 1 What is that ? I jumped up and look- ed about the room, but saw nothing, and endeavoured to con- vince her that there was nothing extraordinary there. But she insisted that a ghost had come and held her bed-curtain, so that' she could not draw it. I examined it, and found that the cur- tain had been caught by a pin in the valance, which had held it back ; but it was impossible to tranquillize her for some time. She insisted on my sleeping with her the rest of the night, and I stretcheil myself across the foot of her bed, and slept there till morning. * During the last part of my stay in the Convent, I was often employed in attending in the hospitals. There are, as I have BLACK NUNNERY 131 before mentioned, several apartments devoted to the sick, and there is a physician of Montreal, who attends as physician to the Convent. It must not be supposed, however, that he knows anything concerning the private hospitals. It is a foct of great importance to be distinctly understood, and constantly borne in mind, that he is never, under any circumstances, admitted into the private hospital-rooms. Of those he sees nothing more than any stranger whatever. He is limited to the care of those patients who are admitted from the city into the public hospital, and one of the nuns' hospitals, and these he visits every day. Sick poor are received for charity by the institution, attended by some of the nuns, and often go away with the highest ideas of their charitable characters and holy lives. The physician himself might perhaps in some cases share in the delusion. I frequently followed Dr. Nelson through the public hospital, at the direction of the Superior, with pen, ink, and paper in my hands, and wrote down tlie prescriptions wliich he ordered for the ditferent patients. These were afterwards prepared and administered by the attendants. About a year*before I left the Convent, I was first appointed to attend the private sick-rooms, and was frequently employed in that duty up to the day of my departure. Of course, I had opportunities to observe the number and classes of patients treated there ; and in what I am to say on the subject, I appeal with perfect confidence to any true and competent witness to confirm my words, whenever such a witness may appear. It would be vain for any body who has merely visited the Con- vent from curiosity, or resided in it as a novice, to question my declarations. Such a person must necessarily be ignorant of even the existence of the private rooms, unless informed by some one else. Such rooms however, there are, and I could relate many things which have passed there during the hours I was employed in them, as I have stated. One night I was called to sit up with an old nun, named Saint Clare, who, in going down-stairs, had dislocated a limb, and lay in a sick-room adjoining an hospital. She seemed to be a little out of her head a part of the time, but appeared to be quite in possession of her reason most of the night. It was easy to pre- I. |i: 182 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. j^ tend that she was delirious ; but I considered her as speaking tLe truth, though I fult reluctant to repeat what I heard her say, and excused myself from mentioning it even at confession, on the ground that the Superior thought her deranged. What led her to some of the most remarkable parts of her conversation, was a motion I made, in the course of the night, to take the light out of her little room into the adjoih^ng apart- ment, to look once more at the sick persons there. Shb ^)egged me not to leave her a moment in the dark, for she could not bear it. " I have witnessed so many horrid scenes," said she, ^^ in this Convent, that I want somebody near me constantly, and must always have a light burning in my room. I cannot tell you," she added, " what things I remember, for they would frighten you too much. "What you have seen are nothing to them. Many a murder have I witnessed ; many a nice young creature has been killed in this nunnery. I advise you to be very cautious — keep everything to yourself— there are many here ready to betray you." What it was that induced the old nun to express so much kindness to me I could not tell, unless she was frightened at the recollection of her own crimes, and those of others, and felt grateful for the care I took of her. She had been one of the night'Watches, and never before showed roe any particular kindness. She did not indeed go mto detail concerning the transactions to which she alluded, but told me that some nuns had been murdered under great aggravations of cruelty, by being gagged, and left to starve in the cells, or having their flesh burnt olT their bones with red-hot iron.3. It was uncommon to find compunction ozpressed by any of the nuns. Habit renders us insensible to the bnfferings of others, and careless about our own sins. I had become so hardened myself, that I find it diflBcult to rid myself of many of my former false principles and views of right and wrong. I was one day set to wash some of the empty bottles from the cellar, which had contained the liquid that was poured into the cemetery there. A number of these had been brought from the corner where so many of them were always to be •seen, and placed at the head of the cellar stairs, and there we were required to BLACK NDNNKRY. 133 take them and wash them out. We poured in water and rinsed them; a few drops, which got upon our clothes, soon mape holes in them. I think the liquid was called vitriol, or some such name ; and I heard some persons say, that it would soon destroy the flesh, and even the bones of the dead. At another time, we were furnished with a little of the liquid, which was mixed with a quantity of water, and used in dying some cloth black, which was wanted at funerals in the chapels. Our hands were turned very black by being dipped in it, but a few drops of some'other liquid were mixed with fresh water and given us to wash in, which left our skin of a bright red. The bottles of which I spoke were made of very thick, dark- coloured glass, large at the bottom, and, from recollection, I should say held something less than a gallon. I was once much shocked, on entering the room for the exanu- nation of conscience, at seeing a nun hanging by a cord from a ring ia the ceiling, with her head downward. Her clothes had been tied round with a leathern strap, to keep them in their place, and then she had been fastened in that situation, with her head at some distance from the floor. Her face had a very unpleasant appearance, being dark-coloured and swollen by the rushing in of the blool ; her hands were tied and her mouth stopped with a large gag. This nun proved to be no other than Jane Ray, who for some fault had been condemned to this punishment. This was not, however, a solitary case ; I heard of numbers who were " hung," as it was called, at different times ; and I saw Saint Hypolite and Saint Luke undergoing it. This was considered a most distressing punishment ; and it was the only oce which Jane Kay could not endure, of all she had tried. Some of the nuns would allude to it in her presence, but it usually made her angry. It was probably practised in the same place while I was a novice ; but I never heard or thought of such a thing in those days. Whenever we wished to enter the room for examination of conscience, we had to ask leave ; and after some delay were permitted to go, but always under a strict charge to bend the head forward, and keep the eyef fixed upon the floor. % I I, ■: t f-'r--i' f: fi i: ; 184 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. / CHAPTER XX. More TisiU to th« Imprisoned Nuni— Their fears — Others temporarily put Into the Cells'— Reliques— The Agnus Del— The Priests' private Hospital, or Holy Retreat- Secret Rooms in the Eastern Wlug— Reports of Murders in the Convent— The Superior's private Records — Number of Nuns in the Convent — Desire of Escape- Urgent reason for it— Plan— Deliberation— Attempt— Success. ■I ^^ I OFTEir seized an opportunity, when I safely could, to speak a cheering or friendly word to one of the poor prisoners, in pas- sing their cells, on my errands in the cellars. For a time I sup- posed them to be sisters ; but I afterward discovered that this was not the case. I found that they were always under the fear of suffering some punishment, in case they should "be found talk- ing with a person not commissioned to attend them. They would often ask, " Is not somebody coming ?" I could easily believe what I heard aflSrmed by others, that fear was the severest of their sufferings. Confined in the dark, in so gloomy a place, with the long and spacious arched cellar stretch- ing off this way and that, visited now and then b^ a solitary nun, with whom they were afraid to speak their feelings, and with only the miserable society of each other ; how gloomy thus to spend day after day, months, and even years, without any prospect of liberation, and liable every moment to any other fate to which the Bishop or Superior might condemn them I But these poor creatures must have known something of the horrors perpetrated in other parts of the building, and could not have been ignorant of the hole in the cellar, which was not far from their cells, and the use to which it was devoted. One of them told me, in confidence, she wished they could get out. They must also have been often disturbed in their sleep, if they ever did sleep, by the numerous priests who passed through the trapdoor at no great distance. To be subject to such trials for a single 'S-i.; » -m 4wi J put Into the ly Retreat- invent— The of Escape- to Speak irs, in pas- ime I snp- 1 that this er the fear found tallc- am. They s, that fear lark, in so lar stretch- [litary nun, and with lomy thus ithout any other fate lera 1 But fhe horrors Id not have ,tfar from te of them •ut. They jy ever did le trapdoor [or a single BLACK NUNNERY. 186 day would be dreadful ; but these uuns had them to endnro for years. I ouen felt much compassion for them, and wished to see thorn released ; but at other times, yielding to the doctrine perpetually taught us in the Ounvent, that our future happiness would be proportioned to the sufferings wo had to undergo in this world, I would rest satisfied that their imprisonment was a real blessing to them. Others, I presume, participated with me in such feel- ings. One Sunday afternoon, after we hati performed all our ceremonies, and were engaged as usual, at that time, with back- gammon and other amusements, one of the young nuns exclaimed, "Oh, how lieadstrong are those wretches in the cells — they are as bad as the day they were first put in 1" This exclamation was made, as I supposed, in consequence of some recent conversation with them, as I knew her to be par- ticularly acquainted with the older one. Some of the vacant cells were occasionally used for temporary imprisonment. Three nuns were confined in them, to my know- ledge, for disobedience to the Superior, as she called it. They did not join the rest in singing in the evening, being exhausted by the various exertions of the day. The Superior ordered them to sing, and as they did not comply, after her command had been twice repeated, she ordered them away to the cells. They were immediately taken down into the cellar, placed in separate dungeons, and the doors shut and barred upon them. There they remained through that night, the following day, and second night, but were released in time to attend mass on the second morning. The Superior used occasionally to show something in a glass box, which we were required to regard with the highest degree of reverence. It was made of wax, and called an Agnus Dei. She used to exhibit it to us when we were in a state of grace ; that is, after confession and before sacrament. She said it had been blessed in the very dish in, which our Saviour had eaten. It was brought from Rome. E^^/ery time we kissed it, or even looked at it, we were told it gave a hundred days release from purgatory to ourselves, or if we did not need it, to our n|^ pf kin in purgatory, if not a Protestant. If we had no suph kins- I ;!■. ' 136 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. l!l man, the benefit was to go to the soula in purgatory not prayed for. Jane Ray would sometimes say to me, '^ Let's kiss it — ^some of our friends will thank us for it. I liave been repeatedly employed in carrying dainties of dif- ferent kinds to the little private room I have mentioned, next beyond the Superior's sitting-room, in the second story, which the priests made their " Boly^Retreaty " That room I never was allowed to enter. I could only go to the door with a waiter of refreshments, set It down upon a little stand near it, give three raps on the door, and then retire to a distance to await orders. When any thing was to be taken away, it was placed on the stand by the Superior, who then gave three raps for me, and closed the door. The Bishop I saw at least once when he appeared worse for wine, or something of the kind. After partaking of some refreshments in the Convent, he sent for all the nuns, and, on our appearance, gave us his blessing, and put a piece of pound- cake on the shoulder of each of us, in a manner which appeared singular and foolish. There are three rooms in the Black Nunnery which I never entered^! I had enjoyed much liberty, and had seen, as I sup- posed, all paO'ts of the building, when one day I observed an old nun go to a corner of an apartment near the northern end of the western wing, push the end of her scissors into a crack in the panelled wall, and pull out a door. I was much surprised, because I had never conjectured that any door was there ; and it appeared, when I afterward examined the place, that no indi- cation of it could be discovered on the closest scrutiny. I step- ped forward to see what was within, and saw three rooms opening into each other; but the nun refused to admit me within the door, which she said led to rooms kept as deposi- tories. She herself entered and closed the door, so that I could not satisfy my curiosity ; and no occasion presented itself. I always had a strong desire to know the use of these apartments : for I am sure they must have been designed for some purpose of which I was intentionally kept ignorant, otherwise they would never m ■,fc * BLACK NUNNEBT. 13t have remained unknown to me so long. Besides, the old nnn evidently had some strong reasons for denying me admission, though she endeavoured to quiet my curiosity. The Superior, after my admission into the Convent, had told me that I had access to every room in the building ; and I had seen places which bore witness to the cruelties and the crimes committed under l^er commands or sanction ; but here was a succession of rooms which had been concealed from me, and so constructed as if designed to be unknown to all but a few. I am sure that any person, who might bo able to examine the wall in that place, would pronounce that secret door a sunpris- iog piece of work. I never saw any thing of the kind which appeared to me so ingenious and skilfully made. I told Jane Bay what I had seen, and she said, at once, ," We will get in and see what is in there." But I suppose she never found an oppor- tunity. I naturally felt a good deal of curiosity to learn whether such scenes, as I had witnessed in the death of Saint Francis, were common or rare, and took an opportunity to inquire of Jane Ray. Her reply was — " Oh, yes ; and there were many murdered while you was a novice, whom you heard nothing about." This was all I ever learnt on the subject ; but although I was told nothing of the manner in which they were killed, I sup- posed it to be the same which I had seen practised, viz. by smothering. I went into the Superior's parlour one day for something, and found Jane Bay there alone, looking into a book with an appear- ance of interest. I asked her what it was, but she made some trifling answer, and laid it by, as if unwilling to let me take it. There are two bookcases In the room ; one on tlie right as you enter the door, and the other opposite, near the window and sofa. The former contains the lecture-books and other printed volumes, the latter seemed to be filled with note and account books. I have often seen the keys in the bookcases while I have been dusting the furniture, and sometimes observed letters stuck up in the room ; although I never looked into one, or thought of doing 80, as we were under strict orders not to touch any of mi'M. 'ii:.!i ■■ '■. 188 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. V^. them, and the idea of sins and penance? was always present with rae. Some time after the occasion mentioned, I was sent into the Superior's room, with Jane, to arrange it ; and as the same book was lying out of the case, she said " Oome, let us look into it." I immediately consented, and we opened it, and turned over several leaves. It was about a foot and a half long, as nearly as I can remember, a foot wide, and about two inches thick, though I cannot speak with particular precision, as Jane fright- ened me almost as soon as I touched it, by exclaiming, "There you have looked into it, and if you tell of me, I will of you." The thought of being subjected to a severe penance, which I had reason to apprehend, fluttered me very much ; and although I tried to overcome my fears, I did not succeed very well. I reflected, however, that the sin was already committed, and that \t would not be increased if I examined the book. I, therefore, looked a little at several pages, though I still felt a good deal of agitation. I saw, at once, that the volume was the record of the entrance of nuns and novices into the Convent, and of the births that had taken place in the Convent. Entries of the last descrip- tion were made in a brief manner, on the following plan : I do not give the names or dates as real, but only to show the form of entering them. Saint Mary delivered of a ion, March 16, 1834. Saint Clarice •> daughter, April 2, ** Saint UaUlda '• daughter, AprU, 80, » No mention was made in the book of the death of the children, though I well knew not one of them could be living at that time. Kow I presume that the period the book embraced, was about two years, as several names near the beginning I knew ; but I can form only a rough conjecture of the nfij^ber of infants born, and murdered of course, records of which it contained. I suppose the book contained at least one hundred pages, that one fourth were written upon, and that each page contained fifteen distinct records. Several pages were devoted to the list of births. On this supposition tliere must have been a large BLACK NUNNERY 139 number, which I can easily believe to have been born there in the course of two years. What were the contents of the other books belonging to the same case with that which I looked into, I have no idea, having never dared to touch one of them; I believe, however, that Jane Ray was well acquainted with them, knowing, as I do, her intelli- gence and pi'ying disposition. If she could be brought to give her testimony, she would doubtless unfold many curious particu- lars now unknown, I am able, in consequence of a circumstance which appeared accidental, to state with confidence the exact number of persons in the Convent one day of the week in which I left it. This may be a point of soma interest, as several secret deaths had occurred since my taking the veil, and many burials had been openly made in the chapel. I was appointed, at the time mentioned, to lay out the covers for all the inmates of the Convent, including the nuns in the cells. These covers, as I have said before, were linen bands, to be bonnd around the knives, forks, spoon«i, and napkins, for eatinj. "'.rse were for all the nuns and novices, and amounted to twu i u.red and ten. As the number of novices was then about iuii'ty, I know that tliere must have been at that time about one hundred and eighty veiled nuns. I was occasionally troubled with a desire of escaping from the nunnery, and was much distressed whenever I felt so evil an imagination rise in my mind. I believed that it was a sin, and did not fail to confess at every opportunity, that I felt discon- tent. My confessors informed me that I was beset by an evil spirit, and urged me to pray against it. Still, however, every now and then, I would think, "Oh, if I could get out!" At length one of the priests, to whom I had confessed this sia, informed me, for my comfort, that he had begun to pray to Saint Anthony, and hoped his intercession would, by-and-by, drive away the evil spirit. My desire of escape was partly excited by the fear of bringing an infant to the murderous hands of my companions, or of taking a potion whose violent effects I too well knew. One evening, however, I found myself more filled with the iill'V ■' 1^ :' ill'-;; J |! ^ '■! B'l'.i ) J. 140 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. desire of escape than ever ; and what exertions I made to dismiss the thought, proved entirely unavailing. During evening prayers, I became quite occupied witii it ; and when the time for medita- tion arrived, instead of falling into a doze as I often did, although I was a good deal fatigued, I found no difficulty in keeping awake. When this exercise was over, and the other nuns were about to retire to the sleeping-room, my station being in the private sick- room for the night, I withdrew to my post, which was the httle sitting-room adjoining it. Here, then, I threw myself npon the sofa, and, being alone, reflected a few moments on the manner of escaping which had occurred to me. The physician had arrived a little before, at half-past eight ; and I had now to accompany him, as usual, from bed to bed, with pen, ink, and paper, to write down his prescrip- tions for the direction of the old nun, who was to see them administered. What I wrote that evening, I cannot now recol- lect, as my mind was uncommonly agitated ; but my customary way was to note down briefly his orders ija. this manner : 1 d salts, St. Matilde. 1 blister, St. Genevieve, io. Ac. I remember that I wrote three such orders that evening, and then, having finished the rounds, I returned for a few minutes to the sitting-room. There were two ways of access to the street from those rooms: first, the more direct, from the passage adjoining the sick-room, down stairs, through a door, into the nunnery-yard, and through a wicket-gate ; that is the way by which the physi- cian usually enters at night, and he is provided with a key for that purpose. , It would have been unsafe, however, for me to pass out that way, because a man is kept continually in the yard, near the gate, who sleeps at night in a small hut near the door, to escape whose observation would be impossible. My only hope, there- fore, was, that I might gain my passage through the other way, to do which I must pass through the sick-room, then through a passage, or small room, usually occupied by an old nun ; another passage and stmrcase leading down to the yard, and a large gate I to dismiss ng prayers, for niedi ta- il, although )iDg awake, re about to irivate sick- ras the little jeing alone, ; -which had le before, at i usual, from his prescrip- to see them t now recol- ly customary mer: [evening, and minutes to from those Ldjoining the |unnery-yard, sh the physi- ^ith a key for lass out that Lrd, near the |or, to escape hope, there- |e other way, ^n through a uin ; anotlier a large gate BLACK NUNN ERY. Ul opening into the cross street. T had no liberty ever to go beyond the sick-room, and knew that several of the doors might be fastened. Still, I determined to try; although I have often since been astonished at my boldness in undertaking what would expose me to so many hazards of failure, and to severe punish- ment if found out. It seemed as if I acted under some extraordinary impulse, which encouraged me to do Avhat I should hardly at any other moment have thought of undertaking. I had sat but a short tiaio upon ' e sofa, however, before I rose, with a desperate determination to make the experiment. I therefore walked fcastily across the sick-room, passed into the nun's room, walked by ber in a great hurry, and almost without giving her time to speak or think, said — "A message!" and in an instant was tlirough the door, and in the next passage. I think there was another nun with her at the moment ; and it is probable that my hurried manner, and prompt intimation that I was sent on a pressing mission to the Superior, prevented them from enter- taining any suspi6ion of my intention. Besides, I had the written orders of the physician in my hand, which may have tended to mislead them ; and it was w^ell known to some of the nuns, that I had twice left the Convent and returned from choice; so that I was probably more likely to bo trusted to remain than many of the others. The passage which I had now reached had several doors, with all which I was acquainted ; that on the opposite side opened into a community-room, where I should probably have found some of the old nuns at that hour, and they would certainly have stopped me. On the left, however, w^as a large door, both locked and barred ; but I gave the door a sudden swing, that it might creak as little as possible, being of iron. Down the stairs I hurried, and making my way through the door into the yard, stepped across it unbarred the great gate, and was at liberty 1 'l,f ! J' • in : ci. 1 .'I ' 1 ■ ■' ;> '■ . !' . i 142 AWFUL DISCLOSURIS. ' ■ CHAPTER XXI. At liberty— Doubtful what to do— Found refuge for the night— Disappointment— My first day opt of the Convent— Solitude— BecoUectlons, fears, and plans. I nkra but a confused idea of the manner in which I got through some of the doors ; several of them, I am confident, were fastened, and one or two I fastened behind me.* But I was now in the street, and what was to be done next? I had get my liberty; but where should I go? It was dark, I was in great .danger, go which way I would : and for a moment, I thought I had been unwise to leave the Convent. If I could return unobserved, would it not be better? But summoning resolution, I turned to the left, and ran some distance up the street; then reflecting that I had better take the opposite direc- tion, I returned under the same Convent walls, and ran as fast down to '^t. Paul's street, and turning up towards the north, exerted all my strength, and fled for my life. It was a cold evening, but I stopped for nothing, having recollected the house where I had been put to board for a short time, by the priest Roque, when prepared to enter the Convent as a novice, and resolved to seek a lodging there for the night. Thither I went. It seemed as if I flew rather than ran. It was by that time so dark, that I was able to see distinctly through the low windows by the light within ; and had the pleasure to find that she was alone with her children. I therefore went boldly to the door, was received with readiness, and entered to take up my lodging there once more. Here I changed my nun's dress for one less likely to excite ♦ Before leaving the nunnery grounds, I ran round the end of tho building, stood a moment in hesitation whether I had not better return, then hastening bacic to the other side, ra» to the gate, opened it, and went out. AT LIBERTY. 143 ippolntment— bad plans. 'hich I got ^ 1 confident, ne * Bnt I ext? I tad trk, I was in X moment, I If I could ; summoning ance np tlie )po8ite direc- d ran as fast ,3 the north, It was a cold ied the house ,y the priest novice, and lither I went, that time so low windows Ithat she was to the door, my lodging pely to excite (10 building, stood Mtenlng back to observation ; and having received a few dollars in addition to make up the diflference, I retired to rest, determined to rise early and take the morning steamboat for Quebec. I knew that my hostess was a friend of the Superior, as I have mentioned before, and presumed that it would not be long before she would give information against me. I knew, however, that she could not gain admittance to the Convent very early, and felt safe in remaining in the house through the night. But after I had retired I found it impossible to sleep, and tho night appeared very long. In the morning early, I requested that a son of the woman might accompany me to the steam- boat, but learnt to my regret that it would not go before night. Fearing that I might fall into the hands of the priests, and be carried back to the nunnery, and not knowing where to go, I turned away, and determined to seek some retired spot imme- diately. I walked through a part of the city, and some distance an the Lachine road, when finding a solitary place, I seated Tny- self in much distress of mind, fearful and anxious, beyond my power, of description. I could not think myself safe anywhere in the neighbourhood of Montreal ; for the priests were numer- ous, and almost all the people were entirely devoted to them. They would be very desirous of finding me, and, as I believed, would make great exertions to get me again in their hands. It was a pleasant spot where I now found myself; and as the weather was not uncomfortable in the daytime, I had nothing to trouble me except my recollections and fears. As for the want of food, that gave me not the slightest uneasiness, as I jfelt no inclination whatever to eat. The uncertainty and doubts I continually felt, kept me in a state of irresolution the whole day. What should I do ? Where should I go ? I had not ft friend in the world to whom I could go with confidence; while my enemies were numerous, and, it seemed to me, all around me, and ready to seize me. I thought of my uncle, who lived at the distance of five miles; and sometimes I almost determined to set off immediately for his house. I had visited it often when a child, and had been received with the utmost kindness. I re- membered that I had been a great favourite of his ; but some considerations would arise which discouraged me from looking I ' kI I. 't: i ■ !| Mi i! i!! 144 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. for safety in that direction. The steamboat was to depart in a few houra. I could venture to pass through the city once more by twilight; and if once arrived at Quebec, I should be at a great distance from the nunnery, in a large city, and among a larger proportion of Protestant inhabitants. Among them I might find friends, or, at least, some sort of protection ; and I had no doubt that I could support myself by labor. Then I thought again of the place I had left; the kindness and sympathy, small though they were, which I had found in some of my late companions in the Convent; the awful mortal sin I had committed in breaking my vows ; and the terrible punishment I should receive if taken as a fugitive and carried back. If I should return voluntarily, and ask to be admitted again : what would the Superior say, how would she treat rae ? Should I be condemned to any very severe penance ? Might I not, at least, escape death ? But then there was one considera- tion that would now and then occur to me, which excited the strongest determination never to return. I was to become a mother, and the thought of witnessing the murder of my own child was more than I could bear. Purgatory was doubtless my portion ; and perhaps hell for ever — such a purgatory and hell as are painted in the Convent: but i;here was one hope for me yet. I might confess all my deadly sins sometime before I died, and a Bishop could pardon the worst of them. This was good Catholic doctrine, and I rested upon it with so much hope, that I was not quite driven to despair. In reflections like these, I spent the whole day, afraid to stray from the secluded spot to which I had retreated, though at dif- ferent times forming momentary plans to leave it, and go in various directions. I ate not a morsel of food, and yet felt no hunger. Had I been well provided, I could have tasted nothing in such a state of mind. The afternoon wasted away, the sun set, and darkness began to come on : I rose and set off again for the city. I passed along the streets unmolested by any one; and reached it a short time before the boat was ready to start. ' ,i''ii'"'"' S PERSECUTIONS 145 jpart in a snco more (1 be at a 1 among a ng them I ion; and I le kindness ad found in wful mortal tlie terrible and carried be admitted le treat me? e? Migbtl le considera- L excited the to become a r of my 0^^^ CHAPTER XXn. start for Quebec— Recognised— Disappointed again— Not permitted to land- Return to Montreal— Landed and passed through the city before day— 'Lachine Canal- Intended close of my life. Soon after we left the shore, the captain, whom I had pre- viously seen, appeared to recognise me. He came up and Inquired if I was not the daughter of my mother, mentioning her name. I had long been taught and accustomed to deceive ; and it may be supposed that in such a case I did not hesitate to deny the truth, hoping that I might avoid being known, and fearing to be defeated in my object. He however persisted that he knew me, and said he must insist on my returning with him to Montreal, adding that I must not leave his boat to land at Quebec. I said but little to him, but intended to get on shore if possible, at the end of our journey --a thing I had no doubt I might effect. When we reached Quebec, however I found, to my chagrin, that the ladies' maid carefully locked the cabin-door while I was in, after the ladies had left it, who were six or eight in number. I said little, and made no attempts to resist the restrictioa put upon me ; but secretly cherished the hope of being able, by watching an opportunity, to slip on shore at tea-time, and lose myself among the streets of the city. Although a total stranger to Quebec, I longed to be at liberty there, as I thought I could soon place myself among persons who would secure me from the Oatholios, each of whom I now looked upon as an enemy. But I soon found that my last hopes were blighted : the maid, having received, as I presumed, strict orders from the captain, kept me dosely confined, so that escape was impossible. I was I Tr (. ill 1 h I 146 AWFUL DISCLOSURES distressed, it is true, to tind myself in tliis condition; but I lind already becoino accustomed to disappointments, and tliereloro perhaps sunk l»^^'s under tliis new one, llian I might otherwise liave dtMie. When the hour for departure arrived, I was there- fore still coiiUned in the steamboat, and it was not until we had left the thore that I was allowed to leave the cabin. The cap- tain and others treated me with kindness in every respect, except that of permitting me to do what I most desired. I liave sometimes suspected, that he had received notice of my escape from some of the priests, with a request to stop my flight, if I should goon board his boat. Ilis wife is a Catholic, and this is the only way in which I can account for his conduct : still I liave not sufficient knowledge of his motives and inten- tions to speak with entire confidence on the subject. My time passed heavily on board of the steamboat, particu- Idrly on my passage up the river towards Montreal. My mind was too much agitated to allow me to sleep, for I was continually meditating on the scenes I liad witnessed in the Convent, and anticipating with dread such as I had reason to think I might soon be called to pass through. I bought for a trifle while on board, I hardly know why, a small medallion with a head upon it, and the name of Robertson, which I hung on my neck. As I sat by day with nothing to do, I occasionally sunk into a doze for a few minutes, when I usually waked with a start from some frightful dream. Sometimes I thought I was running away from the priests, and closely pursued, and sometimes had no liope of escape. But tlie most distressing of my feelings were those I suflfered in the course of the night. We stopped some time at Berthier, where a number of prisoners were taken on board, to be carried up the river ; and this caused much confu- sion, and added to my painful reflections. My mind became much agitated, worse tlian it had been before ; and what between waking fears, and sleeping visions, I spent a most wretched night. Sometimes I thought the priests and nuns had me shut up in a dungeon ; sometimes they were about to make away with me in a most cruel manner. Once I, dreamed that I was in some house, and a coach oame up to i||0 PERSECUTIONS. 147 ipi^ it I l»fti^ hereturo therwiso vs there- , we liad Ihe cap- respect, asjred. 1 ce of my my fl»gl»t, ,\»o\ic, aud conduct : and iiiten- at, particu- My win^ continually invent, and nk I miglit le while on i head upon r neck. As iuto a doze from some kning away jnes h&(i no jelings were [opped some [re taken on luch confvi- lit bad been log visions, I It the priests ts they were aer. Once I door, into which I was to be put by force ; and the man who seized me, and was putting me in, had no head. When we reached Montreal on Saturday morning, it was not daylight ; and tlio captain, landing, set ofl', as I understood, to give my mother information that I was in his boat. lie was gune a long time, which led me to conjecture that he might have found difficulty in speaking with her ; but the delay proved very favourable to me, for perceiving that I was neither lucked up nor watched, I hastened on shore, and pursued my way into the city. I felt happy at my escape : but what was I then to do ? "Whither could I go ? Not to my mother : I was certain I could not remain long with her, without being known to the priests. My friendlessness and utter helplessness, with the dread of being murdered in the Convent, added to thoughts of the shame which must await me if I lived a few months, made me take a desperate resolution, and I hurried to put it into effect. My object was to reach the head of the Lachine Canal, which is near the St. Lawrence, beyond the extremity of the southern suburbs. I walked hastily along St. P^uPs street, and found all the houses still shut ; then turning to the old Recollet Church, I readied N6tre-Dame street, which I followed in the direction I wished to go. The morning was chilly, as the season was somewhat advan- ced : but that was of no importance to me. Day had appeared, and I desired to accomplish the object on which I was now bent, before the light should much increase. I walked on, therefore, bat the morning had broken bright before I arrived at the Canal; and then I found to my disappointment that two Canadians were at work on the bank, getting water, or doing something else. I was by the great basin where the boats ^tart, and near the large canal storehouse. I have not said what was my design ; it was to drown myself. Fearing the men would rescue me, I hesitated for some time, hoping they would retire : but finding that they did not, I grew impatient. I stood looking on the water ; it was nearly on a level with the banks, which shelved away, as I could perceive, I I. 148 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. for some distance, there being no vfm(i to disturb the snrface. Thwre was nothing in tlio sight which seemed frightful or even forbidding to me ; I looked upon it as the means of the easiest death, and longed to be buried below. At length finding that the men were not likely to leave the plaoe, I sprung from the bank, and was in an instant in the cold water. The shock was very severe. I felt a sharp freezing sensation ran through me, which almost immediately rendered me insensible ; and the last ■thing I can recollect was, that I was sinking in the midst of water almost as cold as ice, which wet my clothes, and covered me all over. PERSEOUi'IONS. 149 le fiurface. ul or oven the easiest inding tliat ; from the shock was irougli me, ind the last e midst of ind covered CHAPTER XXIII. Awake amonf itraiigert— Dr. Robertson— Iroprlioned u a Tagrant— Introduction to my mother — Stay in her house — Removal from it to Mrs. McDonald's — Return to my mother's— Desire to get to Mew- York— Arrangeioents for going. How long I remained in the canal I knew not ; but in about tliree minutes, as I conjectured, I felt a severe bio v on my right side; and opening my eyes I saw myself surroTi dod by men, who talked a great deal, and expressed much anxiety and curiosity about me. They enquired of me my name, ^vhere I lived, and why I had thrown myself into the water: b:^.. I would not answer a word. The blow which I had fell, and which was probably the cause of bringing me for a few moments to my senses, I presume was caused by my falling, after J iv j rescued, upon the stones, which lay thickly scattered net ? tL%.> water. I remembei* that the persons around me continued to press me with questions, and that I still remained silent. Some of them having observed the little medallion on my neck, and being able to read, declared I was probably the daughter of Dr. Robertson, as it bore the name ; but to this, I also gave no ans- wer, and sunk again into a state of unconsciousness. When my senses once more returned, I found myself lying in a bed covered up warm, in a house, and heard several persons talking of the mass, from which they had just returned. I oonld not imagine where I was, for my thoughts wer*7 hot easily col- lected, and every thing seemed strange around me. Some of tliem, on account of the name on the little medallion, liad sent to Dr. Robertson, to inform him that a yotu\^ ^;oman had been prevented from drowning herself in the b '^in, who had a portrait on her neck, with his family name stamped upon it ; and he had sent word, that although she could be no relation of his, they had better bring her to his house, as he possibly might be able to I, I 1^^ lit! 1 •■ 1 ,i|,-;;i| 150 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. leara who she was. Preparations were therefore made to con- duct me thither ; and I was soon in his house. This was about midday, or a little later. The doctor endeavored to draw from me some confession of my family : but I refused ; my feelings would not permit me to give him any satisfaction. He olfered to send me to my home if I would tell him where I lived; but at length, thinking me un- reasonable and obstinate, began to threaten to send me to jail. In a shore time I found that the latter measure was determined on, and I was soon put into the hands of the jailer, Captain Hol- land, and placed in a private room in his house. I had formerly been acquainted with his children, but had such strong reasons for remaining unknown, that I hoped they would not recognise me ; and, as we had not met for several years I flattered myself that such would be the case. It was, at first, as I had hoped; they saw me in the evening, but did not appear to suspect who I was. The next morning, however, one of them asked me if I were not sister of my brother, mentioning his name ; and though I denied it, they all insisted that I must be, for the likeness, they said, was surprisingly strong. I still would not admit the truth ; but requested they would send for the Rev. Mr. Esson, a Presbyterian clergyman in Montreal, saying I had something to say to him. He soon made his appearance and 1 gave him some account of myself, and requested him to procure uiy release from confinement, as I thought there was no reason "Why I should be deprived of my liberty. Contrary to my wishes, however, he went and informed my mother. An unhappy difference had existed between us for many years concerning which I would not speak, were it not necessary to allude to it to render some things intelligible which are important to my narrative. I am willing to bear much of the blame: for my drawing part of her pension had justly irri- tated her. I shall not attempt to justify or explain my own feel- ings with respect to my motlier, whom I still regard at least iu some degree as I ought. I will merely say, that I thought slio indulged in partialities and antipathies in her family during my childhood ; and that I attribute my entrance into the nunnery, and the misfortunes I have suffered, to my early estrangement PERSECUTIONS. 151 •Mlf' i from home, and my separation from the family. I had neither seen her nor heard from her in several years; and I knew not wliether she had even known of my entrance into the Convent, although I now learnt, that she still resided where she formerly did. It was therefore with regret that I heard that my mother had been informed of my condition ; and that I saw an Irishwoman, an acquaintance of hers, come to take me to the house. I had no doubt tliat she would think I had disgraced her, by being impris- oned, as well as by my attempt to drown myself; and what would be her feelings towards me, I could only conjecture. I accompanied the woman to my mother^ and found nearly such A reception as I had expected. Notwithstanding our mu- tual feelings were much as they had been, she wished me to stay with her, and kept me in one of her rooms for several weeks, and with the utmost privacy, fearing that my appearance would lead to questions, and that my imprisonment would become known. I soon satisfied myself that she knew little of what I had passed through, within the few past years; and did not think it prudent to inform her, for that would greatly have increased the risk of my being discovered by the priests. We were sur- rounded by those who went frequently to confession, and would have thought me a monster of wickedness, guilty of breaking ihe most solenm vows, and a fugitive from a retreat which is gene- rally regarded there as a place of great sanctity, and almo'st like a gate to heaven. I well knew the ignorance and prejudices of the poor Canadians, and understood how such a person as myself must appear in their eyes. They felt as I formerly had, and would think it a service to religion, and to God, to betray the place of my concealment if by chance they should find, or even suspect it. As I had become in the eyes of Catholics, '' a spouse of Jesus Christ," by taking the veil, rny leaving the Convent must appear to them a forsaking of the Saviour. As things were, however, I remained for some time undis- turbed. My brother, though he lived iu the house, did not know of my being there for a fortnight. When he learnt it, and came to see me, he expressed mnch kindness towards me : but I had not seen him for several years, ,1 ,11 r at the Convent and the Seminary, and had a ticket which entitled her every Monday to the gift of a loaf of bread from the former. She had an unbounded respect for the Superior and the priests, and seized every oppor- tunity to please them. Now the fact that she was willing to take measures to facilitate my departure from Montreal, afforded sufficient evidence to me of her entire ignorance of myself, in all respects in which I could wish her to be ignorant; and I confided in her, because I perceived that she felt no stronger motive, th«n a disposition to oblige my mother. Should any thing occur to let her into the secret of my being a fugitive from the Black Nunnery, I knew that I could not trust to her kindness for an instant. Tlie discovery of that fact would transform her into a bitter and deadly enemy. She would at once regard me &s guilty of mortal sin, an apostate, and a proper object of persecution. And this was a reflection I had often reason to make, when thinking of the numerous Catholics around me. How important, then, the keeping of my seci'et, and my escape before the truth should become known, even to a single person near me. I could realize, from the dangers through which I was brought by the Land of God, how difficult it most be, in most cases, for I Sfrc "^^1^ 156 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. /' a fugitive from a nunnery to obtain her final freedom from the power of her enemies. !Even if escaped from a Convent, so long a3 she remains among Catholics, she is in constant exposure to be informed against; especially if the news of her escape ia made public, which fortunately was not the fact in my case. If a Catholic comes to the knowledge of any fact calculated to expose such a person, he will think it his duty to disclose it at confession ; and then the whole fraternity will be in motion to seize her. How happy for me that not a suspicion was entertained con- cerning me, and that not a whisper against me was breathed into the ear of a single priest at confession ! Notwithstanding my frequent appearance in the street, my removals from place to place, and the various exposures I had to discovery, contrary to my fears, wliich haunted me even in my dreams, I was preserved ; and as I have often thought, for the purpose of making the disclosures which I have made in this volume. No power but that of God, as I have frequently thought, could ever have led me in safety through so many dangers. I would not have my readers imagine, however, that I had at that period any thought of making known my history to the world. I wished to plunge into the deepest possible obscurity ; and next to tlie fear of falling again into the hands of the priests and Superior, I shrunk most from the idea of having others acquainted with the scenes I had passed through. Such a thought as publishing never entered my mind till months after that time. My desire was, that I might meet a speedy death in obscurity, and that my name and my shame might perish on earth together. As for my future doom, I still looked forward to it with gloomy apprehensions : for I conside*red myself as almost, if not quite, removed beyond the reach of mercy. During all the time which had elapsed since I left the Convent, I had received no religious instruction, nor even read a word in the scriptures ; and, therefore, it is not wonderful that I should still have remained under the delusions in which I had been educated. The plan arranged for the commencement of ray journey was this: I was to cross the St. Lawrence to Longueil, to meet the DESIRE TO ViaiT THE UNITED STATES. 157 mthe o long ure to sape is 36. julated slose it motion }d con- reatlied jet, tny [ had to a in my for the in this jquently JO many man who was to accompany me. The woman who had sent my message into the country, went with me to the ferry, and crossed the river, where, according to the appointment, we found my companion. lie willingly untertook to accompany me to the place of my destination, aud at his own expense ; but declared, that he Avas appreliensive we should bo pursued. To avoid tlio priests, who he supposed would follow us, he took an indirect route, and during about twelve days, or nearly that, which wo spent on the way, passed over a much greater distance than was necessary. It would be needless, if it were possible, to mention all the places we visited. 'We crossed Carpenter's ferry, and were at Scotch-mountain and St. Alban's; arrived at Champlain by land, and there took the steamboat, leaving it again at Burlington. As we were riding towards Charlotte, my companion enter- tained fears, which, to me, appeared ridiculous ; but it was impossible for me to reason him out of them, or to hasten our journey. Circumstances which appeared to me of no moment whatever, would influence, and sometimes would make him change his whole plan and direction. As we were one day approach- ing Charlotte, for instance, on inquiring of a person on the way, whether there were any Canadians there, and being informed there were not a few, and that there was a Roman Catholic priest residing there, he immediately determined to avoid the place, and turned back, although we were then only nine miles distant from it. During several of the first nights after leaving Montreal, he suffered greatly from fear ; and on meeting me in the morning, repeatedly said : " "Well, thank God, we are sate so far !" When we arrived at Whitehall, he had an idea we shonld run a risk of meeting priests, who he thought, were in search of us, if we went immediately on ; and insisted that we had better stay there a little time, until they should have passed. In spite of my anxiety to proceed, we accordingly remained there about a week ; when we entered a canal-boat to proceed to Troy. An unfortunate accident ha]Spejied to me while on our way. 1 was in the cabin, when a gun, which had been placed near me, was started from its place by the motion of the boat, I «Q8 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. oansed by another boat running against it, and striking me on my left side, threw me some distance. The shock was violent, and I thought myself injured, but hoped the effects would soon pass off. I was afterwards taken with vomiting blood ; and this alarming symptom several times returned ; but I was able to keep up. We came without any unnecessary delay from Troy to New York, where we arrived in the morning, either on Thursday or Friday, as I believe : but my companion there disappeared with- out informing me where he was going, and I saw him no more. Being now, as I presumed, beyond the reach of my enemies, I felt relief from the fear of being carried back to the nunnery, and sentenced to death or the cells: but I was in a large city where I had not a friend. Feeling overwhelmed with my mis- erable condition, I longed for death ; and yel I felt no desire to make another attempt to destroy myself. On the contrary, I determined to seek some solitary retreat, and await God's time to remove me from a world in which I had found so much trouble, hoping and believing that it would not be long. Not knowing which way to go to find solitude, I spoke to a little boy, whom I saw on the wharf, and told him I would give him some money if he would lead me into the " Imh.^'' (This is the common word by which, in Canada, we speak of the woods or forests.) When he understood what I meant, he told me that there was no hwh about New York ; but consented to lead me to the most lonely place he knew of. He accordingly set off, and I followed him, on a long walk to the upper part of the city, and beyond, until we reached the outskirts of it. Turn- ing off from the road, we gained a little hollow, where were a few trees and bushes, a considerable distance from any house; and there, he told me, was the loneliest place with which he was acquunted. I paid him for his trouble out of the small stock of money I had in my possession, and let him go home, desiring him to come the next day, and bring me something to eat, with a few pennies which I gave him. DESPONDENCT. 159 g md on i) violent, )uld soon )0(1; and wa8 able y to Kew lursday or ared with- L no more, enemies^, I e nunnery, i large city th my mis- QO desire to tary retreat, in which I aat it would CHAPTER XXV. Reflections and sorrow in solitude— Night— Fears— Exposure to rain— Discovered by stranger*— Their unwelcome kindness — Tulten to the Bellevue Almshouse. TnEBE I found myself once more alone, and truly it was a great relief to sit down and feel that I was out of the reach of priests and nuns, and in a spot where I could patiently wait for death, when God might please to send it, instead of being abused and tormented accgrding to the caprices and passions of my persecutors. But then again returned most bitter anticipations of the future. Life had no attractions fur me, for it must be connected with shame ; but death under any circumstances, could not be divested of horrors, so long as I believed in the doctrines relat- ing to it which had been inculcated upon me. The place where I had taken up, as I supposed, my last earthly abode, was pleasant in clear and mild weather ; and I spent most of my time in as much peace as the state of my mind would permit. I saw houses, but no human beings, except on the side of a little hill near by, where were some men at work, making sounds like those made in hammering stone. Tbe shade around me was so thick that I felt assured of being sufficiently protected from observation if I kept still ; and a cluster of bushes offeired me shelter for the night. As evening approached, I was somewhat alarmed by the sound of voices near me, and I found that a number of labourers were passing that way from their work. I went in a fright to the thickest of the bushes, and lay down, until all again was still, and then ventured out to take my seat again on the turf. Darkness now came gradually on ; and with it feara of ano- ther description. The thought struck me that there might be wild beasts in that neighborhood, ignorant as I then was of I f. 160 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. . - the country ; and the more I thought of it, the more I became alarmed. I lieard no olanuing sound, it is true ; but I knew not how soon some prowling and ferocious beast might come upon mo in my defenceless condition, and tear me in pieces. I retired to my bushes, and stretched myself under them upon the ground: but 1 found it impossible to sleep ; and my mind was almost con- tinually agitated by thoughts on the future or the past. In the morning the little boy made his appearance again, and brought me a few cakes which he had purchased for me. lie sliowed liiuch interest in me, inquired why I did not live in a house ; and it was with difficulty that I could satisfy him to let me remain in my solitary and exposed condition. Understanding that I wished to continue unknown, he assured me that he had not told even his mother about me ; and I had reason to believe that he faithfully kept my secret to the last. Though he lived a considerable distance from my hiding-place, and, us I supposed, far down in the city, he visited me almost every day, even when I had not desired him to bring me any thing. Several times I received from him some small supplies of food for the money I had given him. I once gave him a half-dollar to get changed ; and he brought me Lack every penny of it, at his next visit. As I had got my drink from a brook or pool, which was at no great distance, he brought me a little cup one day to drink out of; but this I was not allowed to keep long, for he soon after told me that his mother wanted it, and he must return it. He several times arrived quite out of breath, and when I inquired the reason, calling him as I usually did, "Little Tommy" he said it was necessary for him to run, and to stay but a short time, that he might be at school in good season. Thus he continued to serve me, and keep my secret, at great inconvenience to him- Belf, up to the last day of my stay in that retreat; and I believe he would have done so for tliree months if I had remained there. I should like to see him again and hear his broken English. I had now abundance of time to reflect on my lost condition ; and many a bitter thought passed through my mind, as I sat on the ground, or strolled about by day, and lay under the bashes at night. DESPONDENOT. 161 I 1' II became cncw not ine upon I I'C'lired ! ground: nost con- tain, and me. lie live in a bim to let Bvstanding lat he had to believe he lived a [ supposed, even when ral times I jie money I |t changed ; t visit. lich vras at ly to di'ink |e soon after irn it. He I inquired ly" he said short time, continued [nee to him- id I believe d remained his broken condition ; as I sat on the bushea Sometimes I reflected on the doctrines I had heard at the nun- nery, concerning sins and penances, Purgatory and Hell ; and sometimes on my late companions, and the crimes I liad Mvit- nessed in the Convent. Sometimes I would sit and 8oriously consider how I might best dcritroy my life; and sometimes would sing a few of the Iiyiuns \^'ith wliich I was familiar; but I never felt willing or disposed to pray, as I supposed there was no hope of mercy fur me. One of the first nights I spent in that houseless condition was stormy ; and though I crept under the thickest of the buslics, and had more protection against the rain than one might have expected, I was almost entirely wet before morning; and, it may he supposed, passed a more nncomfortable night than usual. The next day I was happy to find the weather clear, and was able to dry my garments by taking off one at a time, and spreading them on the bushes. A night or two after, however, I was again exposed to a heavy rain, and had the same process afterward to go through with : but what is remarkable, I took no cold on either occasion ; nor did I suffer any lasting injury from all the exposures I underwent in that place. The inconveniences I had to encounter, also, appeared to me of little importance, not being sufficient to draw off my mind from its own troubles ; and I had no intention of seeking a more comfortable abode, still looking forward only to dying as soon as God would permit, alone and in that spot. One day, however, when I had been there about ten days, I was alarmed at seeing four men aproaching me. All of them had guns, as if out on a shooting excursion. They expressed much surprise and pity on finding me there, and pressed me with questions. I would not give them any satisfactory account of myself, my wants, or intentions, being only anxious that they might withdraw. I found them, however, too much interested to render me some service to be easily sent away ; and after some time, thinking there would be no other way, I pretended to go away not to return. After going some distance, and remaining some time, thinking they had probably left the place, I returned ; but to my mortification found they had concealed themselves to see whether I would come back. They now, more urgently than I li 162 AWrUL DISCLOSURES. before, insisted on my removing to sotno other place, wliere I might bti comt'tirtable. They continued to question mu ; but I became distressed in a degree I cannot describe, hardly !;nowing vrliat I did. At last I called the oldest gentleman aside, and told him something of my history. He ezi>ressed great interest for mc, offered to take me anywhere I would tell him, and nt last insisted that I should go with him to his own house. All thcvso offers I refused ; on which one proposed to take me to the Alms- house, and even to carry mo by force if I would not go willingly. To this I at length consented ; but some delay took place, and I became unwilling, so that with reluctance I was taken to tha^ institution, which was about half a mile distant.* * See the alB(l«vlt of Mr. HiUlker, In Appendix. The letter to which he refori I had forgotten to mention. It contain! a short account of the crimes I had witnessed in the uiumery, and was written on paper which *' little Tommj " had bought for me. KNTER THE ALMSHOUSE. 168 CHAPTER XXVr. Reception at the Atmiliouae— Menage from Mr. Conroy, a Roman prieit in New< York — Ills Invitationi to a private Interview — Ills claims, propoiiUons, and threats— Mr. Kelly's message— Uffeots of reading the Bible. I i I WAS now at once made comfortable, and attended with kind- ness and care. It is not to bo expected in such a place, where so many poor and suffering people are collected and duties of a difficult nature are to bo daily performed by those engaged in the care of the institution, that petty vexations should not occur to indivi;luals of all descriptions. But in spite of all, I received kindness and sympathy from several persons around me, to whom I feel thankful. I was standing one day at the window of the room number twenty-six, which is at the end of the hospital building, when I saw a spot I once visited in a little walk I took from my hiding- place. My feelings were diffei'ent now in some respects, from what they had been ; for, though I suffered much from my fears of future punishment, for the sin of breaking my Convent vows, I had given up the intention of destroying my life. After I had been some time in the Institution, I found it was reported by some! about me, that I was a fugitive nun ; and it was not long after, that an Irish woman, belonging to the Institution, brought me a secret message, which caused me some agitation. I was sitting in the room of Mrs. Johnson, the matron, engaged in sewing, when that Irish woman, employed in the Institution, came in and told me that Mr. Conroy was below, and had sent to see me. I was informed that he was a Roman priest, who often visited the house, and he had a particular wish to see me at that time ; having come, as I believe, expressly for that purpose. I showed unwillingness to comply with such an invitation, and did not go. The woman told me further, that he 164 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. I § seut me word that I need not think to avoid him, for it would be impossible for me to do so. I miglit conceal myself as well as I could, but I should be found and taken. No matter w}iere I went, or what hiding-place I might choose, I should be known ; and I had better come at once. He knew who I was ; and he was authorized to take me to the Sisters of Charity, if I should prefer to join them. He would promise that I might stay with tliem if I chose, and be permitted to remain in New- York. lie sent me word further, that he had received full power and authority over me from the Superior of the Hotel Dieu Nunnery of Montreal, and was able to do all that she could do ; as her right to dispose of me at her will had been imparted to him by a regular writing received from Canada. This was alarming information for me, in the weakness in which I was at that time. The woman added, that the same authority had been given to all the priests ; so ihat^ go where I might, I should meet men informed about me and my escape, and fully empowered to seize me wherever they could, and convey me back to the Convent, from which I had escaped. Under these circumstances, it seemed to me that the offer to place me among the Sisters of Charity, with permission to remain in New- York, was mild and favourable. However, I had resolution enough to refuse to see the priest Conroy. Not long afterward, I was informed by the same messenger, that the priest was again in the building, and repeated his request. I desired one of the gentlemen connected with the Institution, that a stop might be put to such messages, as I wished to receive no more of them. A short time after, how- ever, the woman told me that Mr. Conroy wished to inquire of me whether my name was not St. Eustace while a nun, and if I had not confessed to Priest Kelly in Montreal. I answered, that it was all true; for I had confessed to him a short time while in the nunnery. I was then told again that the priest wanted to see me, and I sent back word that I would see him in the presence of Mr. Tappan, or Mr. Stevens ; which, however, was not agreed to ; and I was afterwards informed, that Mr. Conroy, the Roman priest, spent an hour in a room and a passage where I had frequently been; but through the mercy of iiod, I was ^ ^ ENTER THE ALMSHOUSE. 165 employed in another place at that tim3, and had no occasion to go wlitre T should have met him. I afterwards repeatedly heard, that Mr. Gonroy continued to visit the house, and to ask for me ; but I never saw him. I once had determined to leave the Insti- tution, and go to the Sisters of Charity; hut circumstances occurred which gave me time for further reflection ; and I was saved from the destruction to which I should have been exposed. As the period of my accouchment approached, I sometimes thought that I should not survive it ; and then the recollection of the dreadful crimes I had vritnessed in the nunnery would come upon *rae very powerfully, and I would think it a solemn duty to disclose them before I died. To have a knowledge of those things, and leave the world without making them known, appeared to me like a great sin : whenever I could divest inyself of the impression made upon me, by th« declarations and argu- ments of the Superior, nuns, and priests, of the duty of submit- ting to every thing, and the necessary holiness of whatever the latter did or required. The evening but one before the period which I anticipated with so much anxiety, I was sitting alone, and began to indulge in reflections of this kind. It seemed to me that I must be near the close of my life, and I determined to make a disclosure at once. I spoke to Mrs. Ford, a woman whose character I respected, a nurse in the hospital, in number twenty-three. I informed her that I had no expectation of living Ion ;, and had some things on my mind which I wished to communic ate before it should be too late. I added, that I should prefer tc tell them to Mr. Tappan, the chaplain, of wnich she approved, at she con- sidered it a duty to do so under those circumstances. I had no opportunity, however, to converse with Mr. T. at that time, and probably my purpose, of disclosing the facts already given in this book, would never have been executed but for what subsequently took place. It was alarm which had led me to form such a determination; and when the period of trial had been safely passed, and I had a prospect of recovery, anything appeared to me more likely than that I should make this exposure. I was then a Roman Oatholio, at least a great part of my I. 166 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. time ; and my conduct, in a great measure, was according to the faitli and motives of a Roman Catholic. Notwithstanding what I knew of the conduct of so many of tlie priesta and nuns, I thou^'ht that it had no elfect on the sanctity of the Church, or the authority or effects of the acts performed by tlie former at tlie mass, confession, &c. I had such a regard fur my vows as a nun, tliat I considered my liand as well as my heart irrevo- cably given to Jesus Christ, and could never liave allowed any person to take it. Indeed, to this day, I feel an instinctive aversion to offering my hand, or taking the hand of another person, even as an expression of friendship. I also thought that I iniglit soon return to the Catholics, although fear and disgust held me back. I had now that infant to think for, whose life I had happily saved by my timely escape from the nunnery ; and what its fate might be, in case it should ever fall into the power of the priests I could not tell. I had, however, reason for alarm. Would a child destined to destruction, like the infants I had seen baptized and smothered, be allowed to go through the world unmolested, a living memo- rial of the truth of crimes long practised in security, because never exposed? What pledges could I get to satisfy me, that I, on whom her dependence must be, would be spared by those who I had reason to think were then wishing to sacrifice me? How could I trust the helpless infant in hands which had hastened the baptism of many such, in order to hurry them to the secret pit in the cellar ? Could I suppose that Father Phelan^ Priest of the Pariah Church of Montreal, would see his own child growing up in the world, and feel willing to run the risk of Laving the truth exposed? What could I expect, especially from him, but the utmost rancor, and the most determined enmity against the innocent child and its abused and defenceless mother? Yet, my mind would sometimes still incline in the opposite direction, and indulge the thought, that perhaps the only way to secure heaven .0 us both, was to throw ourselves back into the hauvls of the Church, to be treated as she pleased. When, therefore, the fear of inunedinte death was removed, I retiounc- ed all thoughts of communieating the substance of the facti? in ENTERS THE ALMSHOUSE. 167 the fttcts in this volume. It happened, however, that my danger was not pnsst'd. I was soon seized with very alarming symptoms ; then my desire to disclose my story revived. I liad before had an opportunity to speak in private with the chiiplnin ; but, as it was at a time when I supposed myself out of danger, I had deferred for three days my proposed communi- cation, thinking that I might yet avoid it altogetlier. When my symptoms, however, became more alarming, I was anxious for Saturday to arrive, the day which I had appointed ; and when I had not the opportunity on that day, which I desired, I thougljt it might be too late. I did not see him till Monday, when my prospects of surviving were very gloomy ; and T then informed him that I wished to communicate to him a few eecrotSj which were likely otherwise to die with me. I then told hiin_, that wlrile a nun, in the convent of Montreal, I had witnessed the murder of a nun, called Saint Francis, and of at least one of the infants which I have spoken of in this book. I added some few circumstances, and I believe disclosed, in general terms, faonie of the otl^er crimes I knew of in that nunnery. My anticipations of death proved to bo unfounded ; for my Leallli afterward improved, and had I not made the confessions on that occasion, it is vei*y possible I never might have made them. I, however, afterward, felt more willing to listen to in- struction, and experienced friendly attentions from some of the benevolent persons around me, who, taking an interest in me on account of my darkened understanding, furnished me with the Bible, and were ever ready to counsel me when I desired it. I soon began to believe that God might have intended that his creatures should learn his will by reading his word, and taking upon them tlie free exercise of their reason, and acting under responsibility to him. It is difficult for one who has never given way to such argu- ments and influences as those to whicli I had been exposed, to realize ho\v hard it is to think aright .*fter thinking wrong. The Scriptures always atfect me powerfully when I read them ; but I feel that I have but just begun to learn the great truths, in which I ought to have been ea'-ly and thoroughly instructed. I reali2e, in some degree, how it is, that the Scriptures render the I \> 168 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. 1 lf|j " *. ' ■ « , i if if people of the United States so strongly opposed to sncli doctrines as are tauglit in the Black and the Congregational Nunneries of Montreal. The priests and nuns used often to declare, that of all heretics, the children from the United States were the most diffiuult to be converted ; and it was thought a great triumph when one of them woa brought over to " the true faith." The first passage of Scripture that made any serious impression upon my mind, was the text on which the chaplain preached on the Sabbath after my introduction into the house — *^ Search the Scriptures." I made some hasty notes of the thoughts to which it gave rise in my mind, and often recurred to the subject. Yet I sometimes questioned the justice of the views I began to entertain, and was ready to condemn myself for giving my mind any liberty to seek for information concerning the foundations of my former faith. RETURN TO MONTREAL 169 ill doctrines inneries of ire, that of re the most at triuinpU aitb." The essioa upon lied on iho 'Search tho X it gave rise , I sometimes tain, and was berty to seek ormer faith. CHAPTER XXVn. Proposition to go to Montreal and testify against the priests— Oommencement of mj Journey— Stop at Troy, Whitehall, Burlington, St. Alban'a, Plattsburgh, and St. John's— Arriral at Montreal— Reflections on passing the Nunnery. Ae. Aboft a fortnight after I had made the disclosures mentioned in the last chapter, Mr. Hoyt called at the Ilospital to make inquiries about me. I was introduced to him by Mr. Tappan. After some conversation, he asked me if I would consent to visit Montreal, and give my evidence against the priests and nuns before a court. I immediately expressed my willingness to do so, on condition that I should be protected. It immediately occurred to me, that I might enter the nunnery at night, and bring out the nuns in the colls, and possibly Jane Bay, and that they would confirm my testimony. In a short time, arrange- ments were made for our journey, I was furnished with clothes ; and although my strength was but partially restored, I set off in pretty good spirits. Our journey was delayed for a little while, by Mr. Hoyt's waiting to get a companion. He had engaged a clergyman to accompany us, as I understood, who was prevented from going by unexpected business. We went to Troy in a steamboat; and, while there, I had sever&l interviews with some gentlemen who were informed of ray history, and wished to see me. They appeared to be deeply impressed with the importance of my testimony ; and on their recommendation it was determined that we should go to St. Alban's, on our way to Montreal, to get a gentleman to accompany us, whose advice and assistance, as an experienced lawyer, were thought to be desirable to us in prosecuting the plan we had ,in view : viz, the exposure of the crimes with which 1 was acquainted. We travelled frcm Troy to Whitehall in a canal packet, because 8 I i. ^ i,3 110 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. the eftsy motion was best adapted to ray state of health. We met oil board the Kev. Mr. Spragiic of New York, with whom Mr. Hoyt was acquainted, and wlioiu he tried to persuade to accompany us to Montreal. From AVliitehall to Burlington wo proceeded in a steamboat ; and there I wr.s so nmch indisposed, that is was necessary to call a phyfioian. After a little rest, wo set otf in the stago for St. Alban's ; and on arriving, found that Judge Turner was out of town. AVe had to remain a day or two before he returned ; and then he said it would be impossible for liim to accompany us. After some deliberation, it w^as decided tliac Mr. liunt should go to Montreal with us, and that Judge Turner should follow and join us there as soon as his healtli and business would permit.* Wc tlierefore crossed the lake by the ferry to Plattsburgh, where, afier some delay, we embarked in a steamboat, which took us to St. John's. Mr. Hunt, who had not reached the ferry early enough to cross with us, had proceeded on to * * *, and there got on board the steamboat in the night. We went on to Laprairie with little delay, but finding that no boat was to cross .:^ St. Lawrence at that place during the day, wo had to take anotlier private carriage to Longeuil, whence we rowed across to Monf d by tiiree men, in a small boat. 1 had felt quite bold and resolute when I first consented to go to Montreal, and also during my journey : but when I 8tepi)ed on shore in the city, I thought of the ditferent scenes 1 liad witnessed there, and of the ri!*ks I might run before I should leave it. We got into a caleche, and rode along towards tlio hotel where we were to stop. We passed up St. Paul's street; and, altliough it was dusk, I recognised every thing 1 had known. We came at lengtii to the nunnery ; and then many recolleiaions crowded upon me. First, I saw a window from whicli I had sojnetiiiie> looked at some of the distant houses in tliat street; ane'-ly. liut I thought if 1 were once within thv)se walls*, 1 sho lid bo in the coll.? for the remainder of my i * Mr. Hunt was recomniended as a highly respectable lawyer ; to whoau klndifO^Si as well M that o. Judge Vuiner, I feel myself uuder obligations. RETURN TO MONTREAL. ni r.,i^tt^.„- th. We h whom oiade to igtuu wo disposod, rest, wo und that a day or lupossiblo 1, it was and that un as his attsburgh, )at, which d the ferry * * *, and went on to ran to cross ad to take ved across jnted to go 1 stepped jenes 1 had e 1 should awards tlio nVs street ; lad known. icoUeciions inch I hud .hat street ; lances were incc witliin Inder of my rhosokindi)C8*i life, or perhaps be condemned to something still more severe. I remembered the murder of St. Francis, and the Aviiole scene returned to mo as if it had just taken place ; the appearance, language, and conduct of the persons most active in her destruc- tion. Those persons were now all near me, and would use all exertions they safely might, to get me again into their power. And certainly they had greater reason to bo exasperated against me, than against that poor helpless nun, who had only expressed a wish to escape.* When I found myself safely in Goodenough's hotel, in a retired room, and began to tiiink alone, the most gloomy apprehensions filled my mind. I could not eat, I had no appetite, and I did not sleep all night. Every painful scene that I ever passed tlirough, seemed to return to my mind ; and such was my agita- tion, I could fix my thoughts upon nothing in particular. I had left New York when the state of my health was far from being established; and my strength, as may be presumed, was now much reduced by the fatigue of travelling. I shall be able to give but a faint idea of the feelings with which I passed that night, but must leave it to the imagination of my readers. Now once more in the neighborhood of the Convent, and surrounded * My gloomy feelings however did not, always prevail. I had hope of obtaining evidence to prove my cliarges. I proposed to my companions to be allowed to pro- ceed that evening to execute tlie plan I had formed when a journey to Montrciil had first been mentioned. This was to follow the physician into the nunnery, conceal myair under the red calico sofa in the sitting-room, find my way into the collar after all was still, release the nuns from tiieir cells, and bring them out to confirm my testimony. I was aware that there were husards of my not succeeding, and that I must forfeit my life if detected- -but I was desperate ; and feeling as if I could not long live in Montreal, thought I might as well die one wuy as another, and that I liad better die in the performance of a good deed. I thought of attempting to bt'-^out Jane Ray — but that seemed (|uite out of the question, ati an old nun is commonly engaged in cleaning a community-room, through which I should have to pass ; and how could I hope to get into, and out of the sleeping- room unobserved f I could not even determine that the iinpriboned nuii& would follow mo out — for tlicy might be afraid to trust me. However, I determined to try, and prc!iu>ning my companions had all along understood and approved my plan, told them I was ready to gc at once. I was chagrined and mortified more than I can express, when tlity objected, and almost refused to permit rac. 1 insisted and urged the importance of the step — but they represented xn extreme ruslitiess. This conduct of theirs, for a time diminished my confidence in them, a)*bough everybody ebe has appro- ved of it. I IN 112 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. by the nuns and priests, of whose conduct I had made the first disclusures ever made, surrounded by thousands of persons devo- ted to them, ond ready to proceed to any outroge, as I feared, wlienever their interference might be desired, there was abun- dant reason for my uneasiness. I now began to realize that I liad some attachment to life re- maining. When I consented to visit the city, and furnish tlio evidence necessary to lay open the iniquity of the Convent, I had felt, in a measure, indifferent to hfe ; but now, when torture and death seemed at hand, I shrunk from it. Por myself, lit'o could not be said to be of much value. Uow could I be happy with such things to reflect upon as I had passed through ? and liow could I enter society with gratification ? But my infant I could not abandon, for who would care for it if its mother died. I was left alone in the morning by the gentlemen who had ac- companied me, as they went to take immediate measures to opca the intended investigation. Being alone I thought of my own position in every point of view, until I became more agitated than ever. I tried to think what persons I might safely apply to as friends ; and though still undecided what to do, I arose, thinking it might be unsafe to remain any longer exposed, as I imagined myself, to be known and seized by my enemies. I went from the hotel,* hurried along, feeling as if I were on my way to some asylum, and thinking I would first go to tlio house where I had several times previously found a temporary refuge. I did not stop to reflect that the woman was a devoted Catholic and a friend to the Superior ; but thought only of her kindness to me on former occasions, and hastened along Notre Bame street. But I was approaching the Seminary ; and a resolu- tion was suddenly formed to go and ask the pardon and intercession of the Superior. Then the character of Bishop Lartique seemed to present an impassable obstacle ; and the disagreeable aspect * It occurred to me, that I might have been seen by some person on landing, who might recognise me If I appeared in the streets in the same dress ; aid I requested one of the female servants to lend me some of hers. I obtained a hat and shawl from her with which I left the house. When I found myself in Ndtre Dame Btr et, the utmost indccisioD what to do, and the thought of my friendless condition almost overpowered me. RETURN TO MONTREAL. 173 10 tbo first rsons devo- ,3 I feared, was abun- t to life re- furnish tlio nvent, 1 bad hen torturo myself, life 1 1 be happy irougb? and ; my infant I mother died. 1 who had ac- isures to opeu it of my own nore agitated t safely apply ) do, I arose, exposed, as I leniies. if I were on irst go to tlio 1 a temporary was a devoted it only of ber I along N6tre ; and a rcsolu- ad intercession irtiqtie seemed reeable aspect )n on landing, ^^o , ; aid I requested I a hat and shi"* pS6tre Dame Btr et, fas condlUon almost and harsh voice of tho man ns I recalled him, struck me with hurrur. I recollected him as I had known him wbeii engaged in scenes concealed from tbe eye of the world. The tlioiigbt of bitn made me decide not to enter the Seminary. I hurried, therefore, by the door ; and the great church being at hand, my next thought was to enter there. I reached the steps, walked in, dipped my finger into the holy water, crossed myself, turned to tlio first image I saw, which was that of Saint Magdalen, threw myself upon my knees, and began to repeat prayers witli the ut- most fervour. I am certain that I never felt a greater desire to find relief from any of the Saints ; but my agitation liardly seemed to subside during my exercise, which continued, perhaps, a quar- ter of an hour or more. I then rose from my knees, and placed myself under the protection of St. Magdalen and St. Peter by these words : " Je me meta sous v6tre protection'^ — (I place myself under your protection ;) and added, ^^ Sainte Marie, mhrc du bonpasteur, prie pour woi" — (Holy Mary, mother of the tood shepherd, pray for me.) I then resolved to call once more at the house where I had found a retreat after my escape from the nunnery, and proceed- ed along the streets in that direction. On my way, I had to pass a shop kept by a woman'" I formerly had an acquaintance witli. Siie happened to see me passing, and immediately said, ^' Maria is that you ? Come in." I entered, and she soon proposed to me to lot her go and tell my mother that I had returned to the city. To this I objected. I went with her, however, to the house of one of her acquaintan- ces near by where I remained some time, during which she went to my mother's and came with a request from her, that I would have an interview with her, proposing to come up and see me, saying that she had something very particular to say to me. What this was, I could not with any certainty conjecture. I had my suspicions that it might be something from the priests, de- signed to get me back into their power, or, at least, to suppress my testimony. I felt an extreme repugnance to seeing my mother, and in tho * This waa Mrs. Tarbert. m I m AWFUL DISCLOSURES, (]i«trc8*liit; stale of appreliengion and uncertninty in "wlnch I WHS, could (lituniiiiio oti ut»tliing, except to iivoiil her. I there- fore soon left tlie Ijoiise, and walked on wilho.it .my |mrticiilur object. Tlie wiaiher was then very uiipleiisant, and it wiw raining in(!e.ssantly. To this I was very iuditferent, and walked on till I liad got to the suburbs, and found myself beyond the windmills. Then I returned, and passed back thruugi: the city, still not recognised by anybody. I onco saw one of my brothers, unkss I was much mistaken, and thought he knew me. If it was he, I aui confident he avoided me, and that was my belief at the time, ns he went into a yard with the appearance of nmch agitation. I continued to walk up and down most of the day, fearful of 8toppinj< any- where, lest I should be recognised by my enemies, or betrayed into their power. 1 felt all the distress of a feeble, territied woman, in need of protection, and, as I thought, without a friend in whom 1 could safely confide. It distressed uiu extremely to think of my poor babe ; and I had now been so long absent iVom it, as necessarily to suffer much inconvenience. I recollected to liave been told, in the New York Hospital, that laudanum would relieve distress both bodily and mental, by a woman who had urged mo to make a trial of it. In my despair, I resolved to make an experiment with it, and entering an apothecary^s shop asked for some. The apothecary refused to give me any ; but an old man who was there, told me to conio in, and inqiiir; d where I had been, and what was the matter with me, seeing that I was quite wet through. I let him know that I had an infant, and on his urging me to tell more, I told liim whero my mother lived, lie went out, and soon after returned accompanied by iny mother, who told me she had my child at home, and pressed me to go to her house and 8^*it, -ray- ing she would not insist on my entering, but would bring it out to mo. I consented to accompany lier; but on reaching the door, she began to urge me to go in, saying I should not be known to the rest of the family, but ndght stay there in perfect privacy. I was resolved not to comply with this request, and resisted all her entreaties, though she continued to urge me for a long time, RKTURX TOMONTREAL. 115 peHinps lialf an liour. At length slie went in, and I wnlked awiiy, in a Mtafc no lei's ikspcrato lian before. Indeed, nij?lit \V)\H now n|>|>ruucliiM}jr, tlio rain continued, and I liad no prospect of f'lod, rest, or even slnlter. I wont on till 1 reached the parade-jrndind, nnnotit'ed, I believe, by anybody, except one man, who a^*ked wiiero I was goinj;, hut to whom I gave no answer. I had told my motlier, before she had left me, that »ho mifriti Ind mo in the parade-ground. Tliero I stopped in a part of the open ground where there waa no probal»iIity of my being observed, aiii" my present eutferings. I had hoped that my motlier would 1 ring my babe to mo there ; but us it was growing lat gfivo up all expecta- tion of Heeiiig her. At length she came, acconipanied by Mr. TToyt, who, as I afterward learnt, bad called on her after my leaving the hotel, and, at her request, had intrust* d my fldld to her care. Calling again after I had left her house, she had informed him that she now knew where I was, and con-;ented to lead him to the spot. I wttij hard y able to sjjoak or t<» walk, in coiise([uenco of the hard8hip^ T had undergone; but being taken to a small inn, and put under the care of several women, I was mado comfortable with a change of clothes and a warm bed.* • I afterward learnt, that the two gentlemen who accompanied me from tlie Statt'S, liud been geckiiig nie wUli great anxiety all day. I perxLited in not going to my mother's, and that was the reason wliy we applied to strangers for a lodging. Fur some tine It appeared doubtful whether I ithouid And any refuge fur the night, as several Innall Innrt in the neighbourhood proved to be full. At length, however, lodging^^e obtained for me in one, and I experienced kindness from the renmles of the hoirte, who put me into a wurm bed, and by careful treatment soon n-ndered me more comfortable. I thought I heard tlie voice of a woman, in the course of tl)e evening, whom I had seen about the nunnery, and ascertained tlial I was not mitttaken. I forgot to menUon, that, while preparing to leave Uiis house the next day, Mrs. Tarbert came in and spoke with me. She said, that she hud Just come fi i the government-house, and asked, " What are all those men at your modier's for? what is going on there ?" I told her I could not tell. She said, " Your mother wants to "I <'}''' I I i! t M IMAGE EVALUATION TEST TARGET (MT-3} 1.0 jtt ^ 12.2 ^ LS. 12.0 us; I" m^ W m FholDgFEI{to Sciences Corporation 23 WBT MAIN STRHT WltSTn,N.Y. 14SM (716)173-4903 i • ! k ne AWFUL DISCLOSURES. •peak with yoa reiy mneh." I told her I would not go to her home, for X fetred there wm lome plan to get me into the hands of the priest*. The Inn In which I was, is one near the goTernment-house, In a block owned bj ihe Baroness de Montenac, or the Baroness de Longeuil, her daughter. I think it must be a respectable house, in spite of what Mrs. Tarbert says in her affidavit. Mrs. Tarbert is the woman spoken of several times in the " Sequel," without being named ; as I did not know how to spell her name till her affidavit came out. RETURN TO MONTREAL. in CHAPTER XXYIII. Received into a hospitable family— Fluctuating feelings— Visits from several per- sons — Father Phelan's declarations against me in his church— Interviews with a Journeyman Carpenter— Arguments with him. In" the morning I received an invitation to go to the house of a respectable Protestant, an old inhabitant of the city, who had been informed of my situation ; and although I felt hardly able to move, I proceeded thither in a cariole, and was received with a degree of kindness, and treated with such care, that I must ever retain a lively gratitude towards the family. On Saturday I had a visit from Dr. Robertson, to whose house I had been taken soon after my rescue from drowning. He put a few questions to me, and soon withdrew. On Monday, after the close of mass, a Canadian man came in, and entered into conversation with the master of the house in an adjoining room. He was, as I understood, a journeyman carpenter, and a Catholic, and having heard that a fugitive nun was somewhere in the city, began to speak on the subject in French. I was soon informed that Father Phelan had just addressed his congregation with much apparent excitement about myself; and thus the carpenter had received his informa- tion. Father Phelan^s words, according to what I heard said by numerous witnesses at different times, must have been much like the following: — " Th($i*e is a certain nun now in this city, who has left our faith, iind joined the Protestants. She has a child, of which she is ready to swear I am the father. She would be glad in this way to take away my gown from me. If I knew where to find her, I would put her in prison. I mention this to guard you against being deceived by what she may say. The devil has such a hold npon people now-a-days, that there is danger that some might believe her story." 8* m n ^ ill i'l '•M ; ' ii i» 1 I 1 f Sit 178 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. Before he cuiicluded bis speech, as was declared, he burst iqto tears, and appeared to be quite overcome. When the congrega- tion had been dismissed, a number of them came round him, and he told some of them, that I was Antichrist ; I was not a human being, as he was convinced, but an evil spirit, who had got among the Catholics, and been admitted into the nunnery, where I had learnt the rules so that I could repeat them. My appearance, he declared, was a fulfilment of prophecy, as Anti- christ is foretold to be coming, in order to break down, if possi- ble, the Catholic religion. The journeyman carpenter had entered the house where I lodged under these impressions, and had conversed some time on the subject, without any suspicion that I was near. After he had railed against me with much violence, as I afterwards learned, the master of the house informed him that he knew something of the nun, and mentioned that she charged the priests of the Seminary with crimes of an awful character; in reply to which the carpenter expressed the greatest disbelief. " You can satisfy yourself," said the master of the house, " if you will take the trouble to step up stairs : for she lives in my family." "I see her I" he esolaimed — "No, I would not see the wretched creature for any thing. I wonder you are not afraid to have her in your house — she will bewitch you all — the evil spirit!" After some persuasion, however, he came into the room where I was sitting, but looked at me with every appearance of dread and curiosity ; and his exclamations, and subsequent con- versation, in Canadian French, were very ludicrous. " Eh bin," he began on first seeing me, " c'est ici la inalheu- reuse?" [Well, is this the poor creature?] But he stood at a distance, and looked at me with curiosity and evident ftar. I asked him to sit down, and tried to make him feel at his ease, by speaking in a mild and pleasant tone. He soon became so far master of himself, as to enter into conversation. " I understood," said he, " that she has said very hard things against the priests. How oan that be true?" "I can easily convince you," said I, " that they do what they ought not, and RETURN TO MONTREAL 119 ''ll'lJi'UE'. ■ commit crimes of the kind I complain of. You are married, I suppose? He assented. "You confessed, I presume, on tlie morning of your wedding-day ?" He acknowledged that he did. " Tlien (lid not the priest tell you at confession, that he had had intercourse witli your intended bride, but that it was for her sanctific.'ition, and that you must never reproach her with it?" This question instantly excited him, but he did not hesitate a moment to answer it. "Yes," replied he; and tliat looks black enough." I had put the question to him, because I knew the practice to which I alluded had prevailed at St. Denis while I was there, and believed it to be universal, or at least very com- mon in all the Catholic parishes of Canada. I thought I had reason to presume, that every Catholic, married ia Canada, had had such experience, and that an allusion to the conduct of the priest in this particular, must compel any of them to admit that my declarations were far from being incredible. This was the effect on the mind of the simple mechanic; and from that moment he made no more serious questions concerning my truth and sincerity, during that interview. Further conversation ensued, in the course of which I expressed the willingness which I have often declared, to go into the Con- vent and point out things which would confirm, to any doubting person, the truth of my heaviest accusations against the priests and nuns. At length he withdrew, and afterwards entered, saying that he had been to the Convent to make inquiries con- cerning me. He assured me that he had been told that although I had once belonged to the nunnery, I was called St. Jacques, and not St. Eustace; and that now they would not own or recognize me. Then he began to curse me, but yet sat down, as if disposed for further conversation. It seemed fCd if he was affected by the most contrary feelings, and in rapid succession. One of the things he said, was to persuade me to leave Montreal. ' " I advise you," said he, " to go away to-morrow." I replied that I was in no haste, and might stay a month longer. Then he fell to cursing me once more : but the next moment broke out against the priests, calling them all the names he could think of. His passion became so high against them, that he soon began to rub himself, as the low Canadians, who are apt to be :l;i'; !i>l :' i ■ M ' <■ n r i\ Irl \% 180 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. very passionate, sometimes do, to calm their feelings, when they are excited to a painful degree. After this explosion he again became quite tranquil, and turning to me in a frank and friendly manner, said : " I will help you in your measures against the priests : but tell me, first — ^you are going to print a book, are you not ?" " No," said I, " I have no thoughts of that." Then he left the house again, and soon returned, saying he had been in the Seminary, and seen a person who had known me in the nunnery, and said I had been only a novice, and that he would not acknowledge me now. I sent back word by him, that I would show one spot in the nunnery that would prove I spoke the truth. Thus he continued to go and return several times, saying something of the kind every time, until I became tired of him. He was so much enraged once or twice during some of the interviews, that I felt somewhat alarmed; and some of the family heard him swearing as he went down stairs : "Ah, sacre — that is too black 1" He came at last, dressed np like a gentleman, and told me be was ready to wait on me to the nunnery. I expressed my surprise that he should expect me to go with him alone, and told him I had never thought of going without some protector, still assuring, that with any person ta. secure my return, I would cheerfully go all over the nunnery, and show sufficient evidence of the truth of what I alleged. My feelings continued to vary : I was sometimes fearful, and sometimes so courageous as to think seriooi^ of going into the Becolet church during mass, with my child in my arms, and calling upon the priest to own it. And this I am confident I should have done, but for the persuasions used to prevent me.* * I did not make up my mind (so far as I remember), pubiicly to proclaim who was tlie father of my child, unless required to do so, until I learnt that Father Phelan bad denied it. . t ,-rVi » 0: RETURN TO MONTREAL. 181 CHAPTER XXIX. A Blllkman— An Irishwoman— Difficulty in having my Affidavit talcen— Legal objee- tion to it when taicen. I m Anothkr person who express "* a strong wish to see me, was an Irish milkman. He had heaid, what seemed to have heen pretty generally reported, that I blamed none but the Irish priests. He put the question, wl^ther it was a fact that I accus- ed nobody but Father Phelan. I told him that it was not so ; and this pleased him so well, that he told me if I would stay in Montreal, I should have milk for myself and my child as long as I lived. It is well known that strong antipathies have long existed between the French and Irish Oatholics in the city. The next day the poor Irishman returned, but in a very differtot state of mind. He was present at church in the morn- ing, he said, when Father Phelan told the congregation that the nun of whom he had spoken before, had gone to court and accused him ; and that he, by the power he possessed, had struck her powerless as she stood before the judge, so that she sunk helpless op the floor. He expressed, by the motion of his hands, the unresisting manner in which she had sunk under the myste- rious influence, and declared that she would have died on the spot, but that he had chosen to keep her alive that she might retract her false accusion. This, he said, she did, most humbly, before the court, acknowledging that she had been paid a hundred pounds as a bribe. The first words of the poor milkman, on revisiting me, therefore, were like these : " That*s to show you what power the priest has! Didn't hie give it to you in the court ? It is to be hoped yon will leave the city now.'' He then stated what he had heard Father Phelan say^ and expressed his entire conviction of its > H|ii ^ ilfe'- tl 182 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. truth, and tbe extreme joy he felt on discovering, as he supposed he had, that his own priest was innocent, and bad gained such a triumph over me. A talkative Irish woman also made her appearance, among those who called at the house, and urged for permission to see me. Said she, " I have heard dreadful things are told by a nun you have here, against tbe priests ; and I have to convince my- self of tbe truth. I want to see the nun you have got in your bouse." When informed that I was unwell, and not inclined at present to see any more strangers, she still showed much disposi- tion to obtain an interview. "Well, ain't it too bad," she asked, " that there should be any reason fcr people to say such things against the priestst** At length she obtained admittance to the room where I was, entered with eagerness, and approached me. " Arrab," she exclaimed, " God bless you — is this you ? Now sit down, and let me see the child. And is it Father Phelan's, God bless you ? But they say you tell about murders ; and 1 want to know if they are all committed by the Irish priests." "Oh no," replied I, "by no means." Then God bless you," said she. "If you will live in Montreal, you shall never want. I will see that neither you nor your child ever want, for putting part of the blame upon the French priests. I am going to Father Fhelan, and I shall tell him about it. But they say you are an evil spirit. I want to know whether it is so or not." " Oome here," said I, " feel me, and satisfy yourself. Besides, did you ever bear of an evil spirit having a child ?" I heard from those about me, that there was great difiSonlty in finding a magistrate willing to take my affidavit. I anf^erfectly satisfied that this was owing to the influence of tbe priests to prevent my accusations against them from been made public. One evening a lawyer, who bad been employed for the purpose, accompanied me to a French justice with an afi[ldavit ready prepared in English, for his signature, and informed him that he wished him to administer to me the oath. Without any appar- ent suspicion of me, the justice said, " Have you heard of the nun who ran away from the Oonvent, and has oome back to the oity, to bear witness against the priests ?" " No matter about that now," replied the lawyer hastily; "I have no time to talk RETURN TO MONTREAL. 188 lupposed aed such J, among )tt to see by a nun ince my- t in your aclined at 2b disposi- she asked, acU things .nee to the ached me. on? Now r Phelan's, leva; and I ih pviests." bless you," aever want. br putting ig to Father you are an " Oome les, did you . » difficulty in kriPperfectly le priests to nade public, the purpose, idavit ready him that he any appar- leard of the back to the latter about time to talk with you — ^you will take this person's oath now or not?" He could not read a word of the document, because it was not in his own language, and soon placed his signature to the bottom. It proved, however, that we had gained nothing by this step, for the lawyer afterward informed us, that the laws required the affidavit of a nun or minor to be taken before a superior iuagis> trate. I liiii, ii- i • if ) I ! d': m 11';: lil^ 184 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. CHAPTER XXX. ***'|»»I,^^ Interview with the Attorney General of the Province— Attempt to abduct me— More interviews— A mob excited against me— Protected by two soldiers— Convinced that an investigation of my charges couid not be obtained— Departure from Montreal —Closing reflections. Those who had advised to the course to be pursued, liad agreed to lay the subject before the highest authorities. They soon came to the conviction that it would be in vain to look fur **^ any favour from the Governor, and resolved to lay it before the Attorney General as soon as he should return from Quebec. After waiting for some time, he returned ; and I was informed, in a few days, that he had appointed an interview on the follow- ing morning. I went at the time with a gentleman of the city, to the house of Mr. Grant, a distinguished lawyer. In a short time a servant invited us to walk up stairs, and we went ; but after I had entered a small room at the end of the parlour, the door was shut behind me by Mr Ogden, the Attorney General. A chair was given me, which was placed with the back towards a bookcase, at which a man was standing, apparently looking at the books ; and besides the two persons I have mentioned, there was but one more in the room,* Mr. Grant, the master of the house. Of the first part of the interview I shall not particularly speak. The two legal gentlemen at length began a mock examination of me, in which they seemed to me to be actuated more by a curiosity no way commendable, than a sincere desire to discover the truth, writing down a few of my answers. In this, however, the person behind me took no active part. One of the questions put to me was, "What are the colours of the carpet in the Superior's room ?" j^ * Unleaa another WM concealed— as I loipected. PrRSEOUTION S. 185 I me— liloro ivlnced that n Montreal jued, l>ail es. They o look for before the n Quebec, informed, the foUow- f the city, In a short •went; but )arlour, the .y General, [ck towards looking at |oned, there ister of the larticularly Examination more by ft to discover (g, however, 18 questions [rpet in the I told what they were, when they tnrned -o him, and in- qnired whether I had told the truth. He answered only by a short grunt of assent, as if afraid to speak, or even to utter a natural tone; and at the same time, by liis Iiastiness, sliowed that he was displeased that my answer was correct. I was asked to describe a particular man I had seen in the nunnery, and did so. My examiner partly tnrned round with some remark or question which was answered in a similar spirit. I turned and looked at the stranger, who was evidently skulking to avoid my seeing him, and yet listening to every word that was said. I saw enongh in his appearance to become pretty well satisfied that I had seen him before ; and something in his form or atti- tude reminded me strongly of the person whose name had been mentioned. I was then requested to repeat some of the prayers used in the nunnery, and repeated part of the office of the Virgin, and some others. At length, after I had been in the little room, as I should judge, nearly an hour, I was informed that the examination had been satisfactory, and that I might go. I then returned home ; but no further step was taken by the Attorney General, and he refused, as I understood, to return my affidavit, which had been left in his hands to act upon. Besides the persons I have mentioned, I had interviews with numbers of others. I learnt from some, that Father Fhelan addressed his congregation a second time concerning me, and expressly forbade them to speak to me if they should have an opportunity, on pain of excommunication. It was also said, that he prayed for the family I lived with, that they might be converted. ' I repeated to several different persons my willingness to go into the nunnery, and point out visible evidences of the truth of my statements ; and when I was told by one man, who said he had been to the priests, that I had better leave the city, or I would be clapped into prison, I made up my mind that I should like to be imprisoned a little while, because then, I thought I could not be refused a public examination. Some Oanadians were present one day, when the mistress of the house repeated, in my presence, that I was ready to go into k j J .^*' 18G AWFUL DISCLOSURES. tlie nunnery if protected, and, if I did not convince others of the trutit of my ftssertions, that I would consent to be burned. " O yes, I dare say," replied one of the men — " the devil would take her oft*— she knows he would. He would take car© of lier — we whould never be able to get her — the evil spirit 1" A woman present tsaid — " I ouuld light the fire to burn you, myself." A woman of Montreal, who has a niece in the nunnery, on hearing of what I declared about it, said that if it was true she would help tear it down. Among those who came to see me, nnmbers were at first na violent as any I have mentioned, but after a little conversation, became mild and calm. I have heard persons declare, that it would be no harm to kill me, as I had an evil spirit. One woman told me, that she had seen Father Phelan in the street, talking with a man, to whom he said, that the people were coming to tear down thehouse in which I stayed, intending afterward to set fire to it in the cellar. This story gave me no serious alarm, for I thought I could see through it evidence of an intention to frighten me, and make me leave the city.* I was under great apprehensions, however, one day, in con- sequence of an accidental discovery of a plan laid to take me off by force. I had stepped into the cellar to get an iron-holder, when I beard the voices of persons in the street above, and recognised those of my mother and the Irish woman her friend. There was another woman with them. " You go in and lay hold of her," said one voice. " No, you are her mother — you go in and bring her out — wo will help you." I was almost overcome with dread of falling into their hands, believing that they would deliver me up to the Superior. Hastening into a room, I got behind a bed, told the lady of the house the cause of my fear, and calliug to a little girl to bring * I felt very confident, from some oiroumstsnees, that this woman had been sent to bring such a story by Father Pheian; and such evidence of his timidity rather emboldened me. I was in another room when she came, and heard her talking on and abusing me ; then coming out, I said, " How dare you say I do not speak the truth?" " God bless you," said she, " sit down and tell me all.*' PERSECUTIONS. 187 8 of the d. 10 devil ike caro rit !" irii you, nery, on true she t first ns rersation, e, that it an in the he people intending ive me no ridence of ty.* ly, in con- o take me •on-holder, ibove, and her friend. >r cut — we leir hands, Superior. |lady of the rl to bring I had been sent kmldlty rather |her talking on do not speak me my chiUI, I stood m a state of violent agitation. Expecting then) in the Imuso evtM'y instant, and fearing my infant niiglit cry, nnd so lead them to the phiuu of my conceahuent, I put n)y liund upon itH mouth to Iceep it quiet. It Nvus thought desirahle to get tlie testimony of the mistrci^s of the house wliere I spent the niglit after my escape from the nunnery, as one means of substantiating my story. I Iiad been there the day before my visit to tlie house of Mr. Grant, accom- panied by a friend, and on my first inquiring of her about my nunnery dresg, she said she liad carried it to the Superior; spealiing with haste, as it' she apprehended I had some object very different from what I actually liad. It now being thouglit best to summon her as a witness before a magistrate, and not knowing her whole name, we set off again towards her house to make inquiry. On our way we had to pass behind the parade. I suddenly heard an outcry from a little gallery in the rear of a house which fronts anotlier way, which drew my attention. ^^ There's the nun !V exclaimed a female, after twice clapping her hands smart- ly together, " There's the nun, there's the nun !" I looked up, and whom sliould I see but the Irishwoman^ who had taken so active a part, on several occasions in my affairs, on account of her friendship for my mother — the same who liad ac- companied me to Longeuil in a boat, when I set out for New- York, after making arrangements for my journey. She now be- haved OS if exasperated against me to the utmost ; having, as I liad no doubt, learnt the object of jny journey to Montreal since I had last spoken with her, and having all her Catholic prejudi- ces excited. She screamed out : *^ There's the nun that's come to swear against our dear Father Phelan. Arrah, lay hold, lay hold upon her! Catch her, kill her, pull her to pieces." And so Faying she hurried down to the street, while a number of women, children, and some men, came running out, and pur. sued after me. I immediately took to flight, for I did not know what they might do ; and she, with the rest,"pur8tied us, until we reached two soldiers, whom we called upon to protect us. They showed a readiness to do so ; and when they learnt that I n iilnfhl 188 AWFUL DISGLOSUBES we were merely going to a house beyond, and intended to return peaceably, consented to accompany us. The crowd, which might rather be called a mob, thought proper not to offer us any vio- lence in the presence of the soldiers, and after following us a little distance, began to drop off, until all hud disappeared. One of the soldiers, however, soon after remarked, that he observed a man following us, whom he had seen in the crowd, and proposed that instead of both of them going before us, one should walk be- hind, to guard against any design he might have. This was done ; and we proceeded to a house near the one where I had foynd a refuge, and after obtaining the information we sought, returned, still guarded by the soldiers. All our labour in this, however, proved unavailing ; for we were unable to get the woman to appear in court. At length it was found impossible to induce the magistrates to do any thing in the case ; and arrangements were made for my return to New York. While in the ferry-boat, crossing from Montreal to Laprairie, I happened to be standing near two little girls, when I overheard, the following conversation. " Why do you leave Montreal so soon ?" " I had gone to spend a week or two ; but I heard that Anti- christ was in the city, and was afraid to be there. So I am going right home. I would not be in Montreal while Antichrist is there. He has come to destroy the Oatholic religion.** I felt quite happy when I found myself once more safe in New- York ; and it has only been since my return from Montreal, and the conviction I had there formed, that it was in vain for me to attempt to get a fair investigation into the Hotel Dieu Nunnery, that I seriously thought of publishing a book. Under some dis- advantages this volume has been prepared, and unfortunately its publication has been delayed to a season when it will be difScult to transmit it promptly to all parts of the country. I am sure, however, that in spite of all, no material errors will be found in it uncorrected, though many, very many, facts and circumstances might have been added which WQuld have proved interesting. Indeed I am persuaded, from the experience I have already had, that past scenes, before forgotten, will continue to retnm to my PERSECUTIONS. 189 to return icli might any vio- U8 a little One of bserved a 1 proposed 1 walk be- Tbis was lere I bad nre sought, ig; for we igictrates to lade for my ossing from ar two little memory, the longer I dwell upon my convent life, and that many of these will tend to confirm, explain, or illustrate some of the statements now before the public. Bat before I close this volume, I must be indulged in saying a word of myself. The narrative through which the reader has now passed, he must not close and lay aside as if it were a fiction ; neither would I wish him to forget the subject of it as one wor- thy only to excite surprise and wonder for a moment. N:-'':;1 F :^-i: :m\ Ikl^pl i-h'- I that Anti- 1 am going iLntichrist is tt." safe in New- [ontreal, and tin for me to leu Nunnery, ler some dis- »rtunately its 111 be difficult I am sure, be found in arcumstances . interesting. already had, :etnm to my m ... i I ivi. m 190 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. CONCLUSION. It is desired that the author of this volume may be regarded, not as a voluntary participator in the very guilty transactions which are described ; but receive sympathy fo» the trials which she has endured, and the peculiar situation in which her past experience, and escape from the power of the Superior of the Hotel Dieu Nunnery, at Montreal, and the snares of the Boman priests in Canada, have left her. My feelings are frequently distressed, and agitated, by the recollection of what I have passed through ; and by night, and by day, I have little peace of mind, and few periods of calm and pleasant reflection. Futurity also appears uncertain. I know not what reception this little work may meet with ; and what will be the effect of its publication here, or in Canada, among strangers, friends, or enemies. I have given the world the truth, so far as I have gone, on subjects of which I am told they are generally ignorant ; and I feel perfect confidence, that any facts which may yet be discovered, will confirm my words, whenever they can be obtained. Whoever shall explore the Hotel Dieu Nunnery, at Montreal, will find unquestionable evi- dence that the descriptions of the interior of that edifice, given in this book, were furnished by one familiar with them ; for whatever alterations may be attempted, there are changes which no mason or carpenter can make and effectually conceal ; and therefore, there mu>t be plentiful evidence in that institution of the truth of my description. There are living witnesses, also, who ought to be made to speak, without fear of penances, tortures, and death ; and pos- sibly their te^mony, at some future time, may be added to con- C ONCLUSION. 191 jgarded, isactions lis -which her past )r of the e Boman I, by the light, and Is of calm rtwn. I vith; and Canada, he world am told ence, that ny words, plore the naWe evi- fice, given them; for iges which oeal; and titution of e made to and poa- led to con- firm my statements. There are witnesses I should greatly rejoice to see at liberty ; or rather there were. Are they living now ? or will they be permitted to live after the Priests and Superior have seen this book ? Perhaps the wretched nuns in the cells have already suffered for my sake — perhaps Jane Kay Las been silenced for ever, or will be murdered, before she has an opportunity to add her most important testimony to mine. But speedy death, in respect only to this world, can be no great calamity to those who lead the life of a nun. Tlie mere recollection of it always makes me miserable. It would distress the reader, should I repeat the dreams with which I am often terrified at night ; for I sometimes fancy myself pursued by my worst enemies ; frequently I seem as if shut up again in the Convent ; often I imagine myself present at the repetition of the worst scenes that I have hinted at or described. Sometimes I stand by the secret place of interment in the cellar ; sometimes I think I can hear the shrieks of helpless females in the hands of atrocious men ; and sometimes almost seem actually to look again upon the calm and placid countenance of Saint Francis, as she appeared when surrounded by her murderers. I cannot banish the scenes and characters of this book from my memory. To me it can never appear like an amusing fable, or lose its interest and importance. The story is one which is continually before me, and must return fresh to my mind, with painfnl emotions, as long as I live. With time, and Cliristian instruction, and the sympathy and example of the wi«e and good, I hope to learn submissively to bear whatever trials are appointed for me, and to improve under them all. Impressed as I continually am with the frightful reality of the painful oommunioations that I have made in this volume, I can only offer to all persons who may doubt or disbelieve my state- mentH, these two things : — Permit me to go through the Hotel Dieu Kunnery, at Mon- treal, with some impartial ladies and gentlemen, that they may compare my account with the interior parts of that building, into which no persons but the Eoman Bishop and the priests,* » * I ihoald have added, and tttchper$on» at they iiOroduee. :'v,'*:. t ii 192 AWFUL DISCLOSURES. are ever admitted ; and if they do not find my description tme, then discard me as an impostor. Bring me before a court of justice — there I am willing to meet Lartigue^ Dufreme^ Phelan^ JBonin^ and RiehardSy and their wicked companions, with the Saperior, and any of the nuns, before ten thousand* men. Mabia Monk. Neva- Torkt 11th January, 1886. mm ' THE TRUTH OF THB ^■. " AWFUL DISCLOSURES BY MARLA. MONK " DEMONSTRATED. 1. Early means used to discredit the hooJc. Different elasse$ of objectors. — It was anticipated that persons who know little or nothing of the changeless spirit and uniform practices of the Papal ecclesiastics, would doubt or deny the statements which Maria Monk has given of the Hotel Dieu Nunnery at Montreal. The delineations, if true, are so loathsome and revolting, that they exhibit the principles of the Roman priesthood, and the corruption of the monastic system, as combining a social curse, which must be extinguished for the welfare of mankind. From the period when the intimations were first published in the Protestant Vindicator, that a Nun had escaped from one of the Convents in Canada, and that a narrative of the secrets of that prison-house for females was preparing for the press ; at- tempts have occasionally been made to prejudice the publio judgment, by fulsome eulogies of the Roman Priests and Nuns, as paragons of Immaculate perfection ; and also by infuriated denunciations and calumnies of ^ all persons, who seriously be- lieve that every human institution which directly violates the constitution of nature, and the express commands of God, must necessarily be immoral. The system of seclusion and celibacy adopted in Convents is altogether unnatural, and subverts all the appointments of Je- hovah in reference to the duties and usefulness of man ; while the impenetrable secrecy, which is the oement of the gloomy sapentraotore, not only extirpates every incentive to active vir- ml 1, ■• ! # • Hi I;, I m '. *'-\ 194 REVIEW OF TUE WHOLE SUBJECT. tne, but nnavoiJably opens the flood-gates of wickedness, with- out restraint or reint»rse, bfc ipse it secures entire impunity. Since the publication of tlie "Awful Disclosures," much so- licitude lias been felt for the result of the exiiibitions whicli they present us: but it is most remarkable, that the incredulity is confined almost exclusively to Protestants, or at least, to those who pretend not to be Papists. The Roman Priests are too crafty to engage directly in any controversy respecting the credi- bility of Maria Monk's jprrative. As long as they can induce the Koman Catholics privately to deny the statements, and to vilify Christians as the inventors of falsehoods concerning " the Holy Clmrch anc^he Holy Priests!" so long will they laugh at the censures of the Protestants ; and as long as they can in- fluence the Editors of political papers vociferously to deny evangelical truth, and to decry every attempt to discover the secrets of the Romish priestcraft as false and uncharitable, so long will the Jesuits ridicule and despise that incredulity which is at once so blinding, deceitful, and dangerous. The volume entitled " Awful Disclosures by Maria Monk," has been assailed by two classes of Objectors. Some persons affirm that they cannot, and that they will not believe her nar- rative, because it is so improbable. "Who is to judge of the standard of improbabilities ? Assuredly not they who are ig- norant of the whole subject to which those improbabilities ad- vert. Now it is certain, that persons who are acquainted with Poperv, are generally convinced, and readily agree, that Maria Monk's narrative is very much assimilated to the abstract view which a sound judgment, enlightened by the Holy Scriptures, would form of that antichristian system, as predicted by the prophet Daniel, and the apostles, Peter, Paul, and John. 2. The question of Probability. — But the question of pro- babilities may be tested by another fact ; and that is the full, un- shaken conviction, and the serious declaration of many persons who have lived in Canada, that Maria Monk's allegations against the Roman Priests and Nuns in that province, are pre- cisely the counterpart of their ordinary character, spirit, and practice. There are many persons now residing in the city of New York, who long dwelt in Montreal and Quebec ; and who with- ch so- li they iVay 13 > Uiose are too B credi- induce and to ig "the laugli at can in- to deny 3ver the table, so ,y whicli Monk," ) persons . her nar- ;e of the 10 are ig- ilities ad- ited with lat Maria vact view ^criptures, ed by the n of pro- , iefull,un- ny persons allegations le, are pre- spjrit, and the city of and who REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. 195 are thoroughly acquainted witli the situation of affairs among the Canadian Papists — and such of them as are known, with scarcely a dissenting voice, proclaim the same facts which every traveller, who has any discernment or curiosity, learns when he makes the northern summer tour. It is also indubi- table, that intelligent persons in Canada generally, especially residents in Montreal and Quebec, who have no inducement either to falsify or to conceal the truth, uniformly testify, that the nunneries in those cities are notoriolB places of resort for the Roman Priests for habitual and unrestrained licentiousness ; that, upon the payment of the stipulated price to the Chaplain, other persons, in the disguise of Priests, are re^arly admitted within the Convents for the same infamous purpose ; and that many Infants and Nuns, in proportion to the aggregate amount of the whole body of females, are annually murdered and buried within their precincts. All this turpitude is as assuredly believ- ed by the vast majority of the enlightened Protestants, as well as by multitudes of even the Papists in Montreal and Quebec, as their own existence ; and judging from their declarations, they have no more doubt of the fact, than they have of the summer's sunshine, and the winter's frost and snow. Of what value, therefore, is the cavil of ignorance respecting improbabilities ? But it is also objected, that the British government would not tolerate such a system of enormous wickedness. To which it is replied, that the inordinate licentiousness of the Bomau Priests and Nuns in Canada, is demonstrated to be of long standing by the archives of that Province, as may be seen in Smith's History of Canada; year 1733, Chapter 5, p. 194. The author of that work is Secretary of the Province ; and his narrative was compiled immediately from the public docu- ments, which are under his official guardianship and control. He thus writes : — " The irregularities and improper conduct of the Nuns of the General Hospital had been the subject of much regret and anxiety. .Contrary to every principle of their insti- tution, they frequently accepted of invitations to dinners and suppers, and mixed in society, without considering the vows which restricted them to their Convent. The king of France directed a letter, Maurepas' letter of April 9, 1733, to be writtefi J ili i!!; If Ik ill lii m] ■?ii;^ > 1. m 196 REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT to the Coadjutor of Quebec, by the minister having the depart- ment of the Marine ; importing that the king was much dis- pleased with tlie Nuns — tiiat regularity and order might be re- Btored by reducing the nuns to tiie number of twelve, according to their original establishment — and that, as the management and superintendence of tlie community had been granted to the Governor, Prelate, and Intendant, the Coadjutor should take the necessary measures to prevent them from repeating conduct so indecent and improper." The entire affair seems to have been this; that the Nuns of Quebec at that period preferred the gallant military officers, and their bewitching festivities, to the coarser and less diversified indulgences of the Jesuits; upon which the latter murmured, and resolved to hinder the soldiers from intruding into their fold, and among the cloistered females, to visit whom they clniined as their own peculiar privilege, inseparably attached to tlieir . priestly character and ecclesiastical functions. It is infallibly certain that after a lapse of 100 years, neither the Jesuits nor the Nuns in Canada, are in the smallest particle reformed. The British government, by the treaty made upon the surren- der of that province to them, guarantied to the Papal Ecclesi- astics, both male and female, their prior exemptions and special immunities. Many of the officers of the Government in Canada, who have long resided there, are anxious to see the nunneries and their adjuncts totally extirpated ; and it may be safely assert- ed, that they know the character given of those institutions by Maria Monk is a graphical picture of their continuous doings. The British government, for the purpose of retaining their supremacy over the province, have not only connived at those irregularities, but have always enjoined that the public sanction should be given to their puerile shows, and their pageant, pom- pous processions by the attendance of the civil and military officere upon them, and by desecrating the Lord's day with martial music, &o. In this particular affair, the executive offi- cers of the Provincial Government are fully apprised of all the Bubstantiul facts in the case; for an affidavit of the principal circumstances was presented to Mr. Ogden, the Attorney Gene- ral of Canada, and to >,fr. Grant, another of the King's 6oup«el- REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT." 19t lors : and afterward Maria Monk did undergo an examination by ihcse gentlemen, in the liouse of Mr. Grant, at Montreal, in the presence of Mr. Oomte, one of the superior order of priests of that city ; and of another Priest, believed to be either Phelan or Dufresne, who was concealed behind tiie sofa. It is also incontrovertible, that the nominal Papists iu Canada, who, in reality, are often infidels, notwithstanding their jococe sneers, and affected contempt, do generally believe every title of Maria Monk's narrative. This is the style in which they talk of it. They first, accordji^ig to custom, loudly ^coMa the authors ; for to find a Papist infidel who does not br^lWlie third com- mandment, is as diflScult as to point out a moral Roman Priest or a chaste Nun. They first swear at the author, and then, with a hearty laugh, add the following illustration : — " Everybody knows that the Priests are a jolly set of fellows, who live well, and must have license, or they would be contrary to nature. They have the privilege of going into the nunneries, and they woiild be great fools if they did not use and enjoy it 1" Such is the exact language which is adopted among the Canadians; and such are the precise words which have been used by Canadian gentlemen in New York, when criticising Maria Monk's volume. It affords stronger proof than a direct attestation. %<4^ The other class of persons who verily believe the "^^ful Disclosures," are the religious community in Canada. "Wo think that scarcely a well-informed person can be discovered in Mon- treal or Quebec, who does not feel assured, that the interior of the Hotel Dieu Nunnery is most faithfully depicted by Maria Monk. Many persons are now inhabitants of New- York who formerly resided in Montreal, some of whom have been upon terras of familiar intimacy for years with those Roman Priests, who are specified as the principal actors in the scenes depicted in that book; and they most solemnly declare, that they have no doubt of the truth of Maria Monk's narrative. Mr. Samuel B. Smith, who has been not only a Roman Priest, but has had several cages of nuns under his sole management, questioned Maria Monk expressly respecting those affairs, cus- toms and ceremonies, which appertain only to nunneries, because they cannot be practiced by any other females but those who are i 'I wm i 1" . ~ ti ?: ! :i f-*'' i M m 1. 198 REVIEW OP THE WHOLE SUBJECT. \ shut up in tlio<)o dungeons; and, after having minutely examined her, he plainly averred that it was manifest she could not huve known tlio things wliich she communicated to him unless tviih Maria Monlv^s delineations are the undoubted belief of eacli class of persons, and of every variety of condition, and in all places which they visited in Lower Canada. Mr. (t feenjield^ the fatiier of the gentleman who owns tho two steamboats on tho river St. Lawrence, called the Lady of the Lake, and the Canadian Eagle, who is a citizen of New- York, ftvows his unqualified assent to all Maria Monk's state- ments, and most emphatically adds — '•^ Maria Monk has not dis- closed one tenth part of the truth respecting the Roman Priest* and Kuns in Canada. Fifty other persons from that province, now residing in New- York, likewise attest the truth of the " Disclosures." At Sorel, Berthier, and Three Rivers, the usual stopping-places for the steamboats on the River St. Lawrence, the Priests, if they have any cause to be at the wharf, may be see^accom- imnied by one oi" more children, their " Nephews^^'' as the Priests facetiously ([^nounnaiQ their offspring; and if any person on tho steamboat should be heard expatiating upon the piety, the tem- perance, the honesty, or the purity of Roman Priests and Nuns, he would be laughed at outright, either as a natural or an ironi- cal jester; while the priest himself would join in the merriment, as being a " capital joke." "We are assured by the most indisputable authority in Mont- real, that the strictly religious people in that city do generally credit Maria Monk's statements without hesitation ; and the decisive impression of her veracity can never be removed. If it were possible at once to reform the nunneries, and to transform them from castles of ignorance, uncleanness, and murder, where all their arts are concealed in impervious secrecy, into abodes of wisdom, chastity, and benevolence, to every recess of which all persons, at every hour, might have, unrestricted admission — that would not change the past; it would leave them indelibly branded with the emphatical title applied to the nunnery at Charlestown, " Filthy, murderous dkns." W- m I '. i •,ii vm .♦ 200 REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. 8. Who are those who deny the truth of the loohf Caeeoj Father Conroy. Father Conrmfe deception. In addition to the objections from improbability, another series of opposition consists of flat, broad denials of the truth of Maria Monk's "Awful Disclosures." Tliis mode of vanquishing direct charges is oven more invalid than the former futile cavilling. It is hIso remarkable, wlien we remember who are the persons that deny the statements made by Maria Monk. Are they the Roman Priests implicated ? Not at all. They are too crafty. Tlie only persons who attempt to hint even a suspicion of the truth of the secrets divulged in the "Awful Disclosures," are editors of Newspapers: some of whom are over found on the side of infidelity and vice; men always reproaching religion; and directly calumniatiDg, or scornfully ridiculing the best Chris- tians in the land; and profoundly ignorant of Popery and Jesuitism, and the monastic system. It is true that Priest Conroy of New- York, has contradicted in general terms the truth of the statement respecting himself, and his attempt to abduct Maria Monk from the Almshouse. But wj^t does he deny ? He is plainly charged, in the " Awful Disclosures," witli a protracted endeavor, by fraud or hy force to remove Maria Monk from that institution. Now that charge Involves a flagrant misdemeanor, or it is a wicked and gross libel. Let him answer the following questions : Did he not frequently visit the house, and lurk about at vari- ous times, for longer and shorter periods, expressly to have an interview with Maria Monk ? Did he not state that ho was acquainted with her by the name she bore in the nunnery, Sainte Eustace. Did he not declare that he was commissioned by Lartigue, Fhelan, Dufresne, Kelly, and the Abbess of the Hotel Dieu Nunnery at Montreal, to obtain a possession of her, that she might be sent back to the abode of the Furies ! Did ho not offer her any thing she pleased to demand, pro- vided she would reside with the Ursulines of this city ? Did be not also declare that he would have her at all risks, and that she could not escape him ? Did he not persevere in this course of action, until he was REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. 201 po>itivi'ly ftssurt'd tliftt she would not see liim, and that tho Priest Cunroy sh.mld not have access to Maria Monk? Was not tiio priest Kelly, from Canada, in Now- York at that period, prompting Com-uy ; and did not that same Kelly come on hero expressly u> ohtain p(»ssession of Maria Mon ., that he niight carry her back to the Hotel Dieu Nunnery, ihoro to mnrder lier, as his accomplicos have smothered, poisoned, and l/lcd tu de./th Other victims of their beastly liccntiousnes-, .' All these questions are implied in Maria Monk's Htatement, and they involve the highest degree of crime against the liberty, rights, and life of Maria Monk, and the laws of New-York, and tho charge is either true or false. Why does not the Priest Oouroy try it? "Why does he not demonstrate that ho is calum- niated, by confronting the Authoress and Publisliers of tho book before an impartial jury. We are assured that the Executive connnittee of the New- York Protestant Asssociatioa will give ten dollars to any Lawyer, whom Mr. Conroy will authorize to Institute a civil suit for libel, payable at the termination of the process. Will he subject the question to that scrutiny? Never. He would rather follow the example of his fellow priests, and depart from New-York. Many of the Maynooth JesuidJ after having fled from Ireland for their crimes, to this country, to avoid the punishments due to them for the repetition of them in the United States, and to elude discovery, have assumed false names and gone to France; or in disguise have joined their dissolute companions in Canada. It is also a fact, that the Priest, named Quarter, with one of his minions, did visit the house where Maria Monk resides, on the 13th day of February, 1836 ; and did endeavor to see her alone, nnder the false pretext of delivering to her a packet from her brother in Montreal ; and as an argument for having an inter- view with her without company, one of the two impostors did protest that he had a parcel from John Monk ; which " he had sworn not to deliver except into the hands of his sister in per- son." Now what object had ^r. Quarter in view ; and what was his design in going to her residence between nine and ten o^clock at night, nnder a lying pretence ? Mr. Quarter comes from Oanada. He knows all the Priests of Montreal. For 9* I ill -\ \fp . , '>'} 202 REVIEW OP TllK WHOLE SUBJECT. ^' what purpose did ho assume n fictitious character, and utter base and wilful falsehoods, that he might have access to her, with another man, when Maria Monk, as they hoped, would bo without a protector? For what ignoble design did he put an old Truth Teller into a i)arcel, and make his priest-ridden minion declare that it was a very valuable packet of letters from John Monk ? That strungo contrivance requires explanation. Did Priest Quarter believe that Maria Monk was in Montreal ? Did he doubt lior personal identity ? Does not that tact alone verify that all the Roman Priests are confederated ? Does it not prove that her delineations are correct? Does it not evince that the Papal Eccle.»iastic8 dread the disclosures? 4. The great ultimate test which the nature of this case demands. _ Challenge of the New York Protestant Association. — It is read- ily admitted, that the lieinous charges which are made by Maria Monk against the Roman priests cannot easily be rebutted in the usual form of disproving criminal allegations. The denial of those Priests is good for nothing, and they cannot show an alibi. But there is one mode of destroying Maria Monk's testimony, equallyprowjjoi and decisive^ and no other way is either feasible, jusl, or can be efficient. That method is the plan proposed by the New- York Protestant Association. The Hotel Dieu Nunnery is in Montreal. Here is Maria Monk's description of its interior apartments and passages. Slw offers to go to Montreal under the protection of a committee of four members of the New-York Protestant Association, and in company with four gentlemen of Montreal, to explore the Nun- nery ; and she also voluntarily proposes that if her descriptions of the interior of the Hotel Dieu Nunnery are not found to be true, she will surrender herself to Lartigue and his confederates to torture her in what way they may please, or will bear the punishment of the civil laws as a base and wilful slanderer of the Canadian Jesuit Eoclesiatics. When Lartigue, Bonin, Dufresne, Phelan, Richards, and their fellows, accede to this proposition, we shall hesitate respecting Maria Monk's veracity ; until then, by all impartial and intelli- gent judges, and by enlightened Protestants and Christians, the ^^ Awful Disolosures" will be prouonnoed nndeniable faots. REVIEW OP THE WHOLE SUBJECT. 203 The scrutiny, however, respectinj; Mar'm Monk's credibility com- prises two general (mesti<»ns, to which wo shall succinctly reply. 1. Was ]Jnria Monk a Nun in the Hotel iJieu Convent at Montreal? — In ordinary cnses, to dispute respecting a circum- stance of that kind would be deemed a most strango absurdity ; and almost similar to an inquiry into a nmn'a personal identity wlien his living form is before your eyes. Maria Monk saya slio was a nun, presents you a book dei?criptive of the Convent in wliich she resided, and leaves tlie fact of her abode there to be verified by the minute accuracy of her delineations of arcana, with which only the visiting Roman Priests and the imprisoned nuns are acquainted. That test, neither Lartigue nor the Priests will permit to be applied; and therefore, so far, Maria Monk's testimony cannot directly be corroborated. It is however not a little remarkable, that no one of all the persons so boldly im- peached by her of the most atrocious crimes, has even whi>pered a hint that she was not a nun ; while the priest Conroy has confirmed that fact far more certainly than if ho had openly as- serted its truth. 6. The TeUimony ofMn. MonTc considered. — The only evidence against that fact is her mother. Now it is undeniable, that her mother is a totally incompetent witness. She is known in Mon- treal to be a woman of but little principle ; and her oath in . her daughter's favour would be injurious to her; for she is so habi- tually intemperate, that it is questionable whether she is ever truly competent to explain any matters which come under her notice. Truth re(piire8 this declaration, although Maria, with commendable filial feelings, did not hint at the fact. Besides, during a number of years past, she has exhibited a most unnatural aversion, or rather animosity, to her daughter ; so that to her bar- barous usage of Maria when a ciiiid, may bo imputed the subse- quent scenes through wiiich she has passed. When appealed to res[>ectiiig her daughter, her uniform language was such as this — *' I do not care what i)ecomes of her, or who takes her, or wliere she goes, or what is done to her, provided she keeps a>vay from me. » It is also testified by the most unexceptionable witnesses in Montreal, that when Maria Monk went to that city in August, '^l I l i m i.;i }\ 204 REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. 1835, and first made known her case, that Mrs. Monk repeatedly declared, that her daughter had been a Kun ; and that she had been in the Nunneries at Montreal a large portion of her life. She also avowed, that the offer of bribery that had been made unto her, had been made, not by Protestants, to testify that her daughter Maria had been an inmate of the Hotel Dieu Nunnery ; but by the Roman Priests, who had promised her one hundred dollars, if she would make an affidavit that Maria had not been in that nunnery at all ; and would also swear to any other mat- ters which they dictated. Now there is little room for doubt, that the affidavit tq the truth of which she finally swore was thus obtained ; for she has not capacity to compose such a narrative, nor has she been in a state of mind, for a number of years past, to understand the details which have thus craftily been imposed upon the public in her name. When she had no known induce- ment to falsify the fact in August, 1885, before the Priests be- came alarmed, then she constantly affirmed that her daughter had been a Nun ; but after Lartigue and his companions were assured that her daughter's narrative would appear, then the mother was probably bribed, formally to swear to a wilful falsehood ; for it is most probable, that she either did not see, or from intoxication could not comprehend, the contents of the paper to which her signature is affixed. Her habitual intempe- rance, her coarse impiety, her long-indulged hatred and cruelty towards her daughter, and her flat self-contradictions, with her repeated and public declarations, that she had been offisred a large sum of money by the Montreal Priests, thus to depreciate her daughter's allegations, and to attest upon oath precisely the contrary to that which she had previously declared, to persons whose sole object was to ascertain the truth — ^all those things demonstrate that Mrs. Monk's evidence is of no worth ; and yet that is all the opposite evidence which can be adduced. 6. Testimony in fa/cmir of the look. — ^Mr. Miller the son of Adam Miller, a well known teacher at St. John's, who has known Maria Monk from her childhood, and who is now a resident of New York, solemnly attests, that in the month of August, 1888, he made inquiries of Mrs. Monk respecting her daughter Mai'ia, and that Mrs. Monk informed him that Maria was then a Nun I REVIEW 1-' THE WHOLE SUBJECT. 205 that she had taken the yeil previous to that conversation, and that she had been in the nunnery for a number of years. Mr. Miller voluntarily attests to that fact. He was totally ignorant of Maria Monk's being out of the Nunnery at Montreal, until he saw her book, and finally by searching out her place of abode, renewed the acquaintance with her which had existed between them from the period when she attended his father's school in her childhood. See the affidavit of William Miller. When Maria Monk made her escape, as she states, from the Hotel Dieu Nunnery, she took refuge in the house of a woman named Lavalliere in Elizabeth street, Montreal, the second or third door from the corner of what is commonly called " the Bishop's Church." Madame Lavalliere afterward admitted, that Maria Monk did arrive at her house at the time specified, in tlie usual habiliments of a Nun, and made herself known as an eloped Nun ; that sjie provided her with other clothing ; and that she afterward carried the Nun's garments to the Hotel I)ieu Nun- nery. After her escape, Maria Monk narrates that she went on board a steamboat for Quebec, intending thereby to avoid being seized and again transferred to the Nunnery, that she was recognised by the Captain, was kept under close watch during the whole period of the stay of that boat at Quebec, and merely by accident escaped the hands of the Priests, by watching for an unexpected opportunity to gain the shore during the absence of the Captain, and the momentary negligence of the female attendant in the cabin. The woman was called Margaret , the other name is forgotten. The name of the Master of the steamboat is prob- ably known and he has never pretended to deny that statement, that he did thus detain Maria Monk, would not permit her to gc> on shore at Quebec, and that he also conducted her back to Mon- treal ; having suspected or ascertained that she was a Nun who had clandestinely escaped from a Convent. 7. Corroborative evidence unintentionally furnished hy the op- ponents of the iook. — After her flight from the steamboat, she was found early in the morning, in a very perilous situation, either on the banks, or partly in Lachine Canal, and was com- mitted to the public prison by Dr. Robertson, whence she was I r '..i:l ',1 ,1 I 206 REVIEW OP THE WHOLE SUBJECT. Speedily released through the intervention of Mr. Esson, one of the Presbyterian ministers of Montreal. Upon this topic, her statement coincides exactly with that of Dr. liubertson. But he also states — "Although incredulous as to the truth of Maria Monk's story, I thought it incumbent upon me to make some inquiry concerning it, and have ascertained where she has been residing a great part of the time she states having been an inmate of the Nunnery. During the summer of 1832, she was at, service at William Blenry ; the winters of 1832-3, she passed in this neighborhood at St. Ours and St. Denis," That is most remarkable testimony, because, although Papists may justly be admitted to know nothing of times and dates, unless by their Carnivals, their Festivals, their Lent, or their Penance — ^}'et Protestant Magistrates might be more precise. Especially, as it is a certain fact, that no person at Sorel can be discovered, who is at all acquainted with such a young woman in service in the summer of 1832. It is true, she did reside at St. Denis or St. Ours, as the Roman Priests can testify ; but not at the period specified by Dr. Robertson. For the testimony of a decisive witness in favour of Maria Monk, see the statement of an old schoolmate in Appendix. 8. Summai'y view ojr the evidence. — ^Let us sum up this con- tradictory evidence respecting the simple fact, whether Maria Monk was a resident of the Hotel Dieu Nunnery or not? Her mother says — " I denied that my daughter had ever been in a Nunnery. " Dr. Robertson informed us — " I have ascertain- ed where she has been residing a great part of the time she states having been an inmate of the Nunnery." That is all which can be adduced to Qontradict Maria Monk's statement. This is a most extraordinary afi^air, that a young woman's place of abode cannot be accurately discovered during several years, when all the controversy depends upon the fact of that residence. Why did not Dr. Robertson specify minutely with whom Maria Monk lived at service at William Henry, in the summer of 1832 ? — Why did not Dr. Robertson exactly designate where, and with whom, she resided at St. Denis and St. Ours, in the winters of 1832 and 1833 ? The only answer to these ques- tions is this — Dr. Robertson runnot. He obtained his contradictor REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. 207 m ry information most probably from her mother, or from the Priest Kelly, and then embodied it in liis affidavit to regain that favour and popularity with t!ie Montreal Papists wliich he has so long lost. We are convinced that neither the evidence of Mrs. Monk, nor Dr. Robertson, would be of a featlier's weight in a court of justice against the other witnesses, Mrs. , and Mr. William Miller. Maria Monk asserts, that she was a resident of the Hotel Dieu Nunnery during the period designated by Dr. Robertson, wliich is familiarly denominated the Cholera summer. In her narrative she develops a variety of minute and characteristic details of proceedings in that Institution, connected with things which all persons in Montreal know to have actually occurred, and of events which it is equally certain did happen, and which did not transpire anywhere else; and ■which is impossible could have taken place at S«)rel or William Henry ; because there is no Nunnery there ; and consequently her descriptions would be purely fabricated and ficticious. But the things asserted are not inventions of imagination. No person could thus delineate scenes which he bad not beheld ; and therefore Maria Monk witnessed them; consequently, she was a member of that family community ; for the circumstances which she narrates nowhere else occurred. At all events, it seems more reasonable to suppose that an individual can more certainly tell what had been his own course of life, than persons who, by their own admission, know nothing of the subject ; and especially when her statements are confirmed by such unexcep- tionable witnesses. There are, however, two collateral points of evidence which strongly confirm Maria Monk's direct statements. One is derived from the very character of the acknowledgments which she made, and the period when they were first disclosed. "A death-bed," says the Poet, " is a detecter of the heart." Now it is certain, tliat the appalling facts which she states, were not primarily made in a season of hilarity, or with any design to " make money " by them, or with any expectation that they would be known to any other person than Mr. Hilliker, Mr. Tappan, anns and insecure; if th^y liave any s-olieitude for their con fi derates, they will intrepidly defy research, and dauntlessly accept tlie otler of tlie New York Prote.-«tant Association : that a joint committee of di-interested, etdi<.ditened and honorable judjres, should tnlly investigate, and equi'.ably decide upon the trnih or falsehood of Mariu Monk's avtMMuents. Their ominous silence, their ati'ected contempt, and their audacious refusal, are cacul.ited only to convince every impartial ])erson, of even the sniallest discernment, tif the real state of things in that edifiio ; that the chambers of pol- lutlofj are above, and tlmt the dungeon of tt)rture and death are below; and that they dread the exposure of the theatre on which their liorrible tragedies are performed. It is also a fact publicly avoAved by certain Montreal Papists themselves, and extensively told in taunt and triumpfh, that they liave been employed as masons and carpenters by the Ronuin Priefits, since Maria Monk's visit to Montreal in August, 1835, expressly to alter various parts of the Hotel Dieu Convent, and to close up some of the subterraneous passages and cells in that nunnery. This circumstance is not pretended even to be disputed or doubted ; for when the dungeons under ground are spoken of before the Papists, their remark is this : Eh bien ! niais vous ne les trouverez pas, b. present; on les a cach^ hors de vue. Very w€ 11, you will not lind them there now; they are closed up, and out of sight." Why was the manoeu- vre completed ? Manifestly, that in urgent extremity, a casual explorer nnght be deceived, by the apparent proof tliat the ave- nues, and places of imprisonment and torture which Maria Monk describes are not discoverable. Now vJmt circumstance might not even been suspected, if the Papist workmen them- selves had not openly boasted of the chicanery by which the Priests, who employed them, expected to blind and deceive the Protestants. For in reference to the Romanists, a Popish Priest well knows that nothing more is necessary than for him to assert any absurdity, however gross or impossible, and attest it by tiiefive cro^ses on his vestments, and his own superstitit)U8 vassal believes it with more assurance than bis own personal identity. But the tilling up and the concealment of tlie old apertures in the nunnery, by the order of the Roman Priests are scarcely less powerful corroborative proof of Maria Monk's delineations, than ocular and palpable demonstration. 2. Some of the circumstances attending Maria Monk's visit to Montreal, in August, 1835, add great weight in favour of f mm M 212 REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. the truth, wliich no cavils, skepticism, scorn, nor menaces, can cui;ntorl)ulurice. Wo will however state one very recent occurrence, because it seems to us, tliut it alone is uliiiust decisive of the controversy. A counsellor ot Quebec — his name is omitted merely I'rom dtli- r,.,cy mid j)rudeniial con^ideratiolls — has been in Now Yorlc since the publication of the "Awful Di8clo8ure^." His mind was so mucli indiienced by the perusal of that volume, that he souglit out the Authoress, and most closely searched into the credibility <»! htv statements. Before the termination of the interview, that gentleman became so convinced of the truth of the picture \x iiich Maria Monk drew of the interior of the Canadian Nun- leries, that he expressed himself to the following etiect: — "My (hiugliter, about 15 years of age, is in the Ursuline Convent at Quebec. I will return home immediately; and if I cannot re- move her any other way, 1 will drag her out by the hair of her head, and raise a noise about their ears that shall not soon be quieted." That gentleman did* so return to Quebec, since which he has again visited New York ; and he stated, that upon his arrival in Quebec, he went to the Convent, and instantly removed his daughter from the Ursuline Nunnery; from whom he ascertain- ed, as far as she had been initiated into the mysteries, that Maria Monk's descriptions of Canadian Nunneries, are most minutely and undeniably accurate. We have already remarked, that Mrs. ****, Mr. Lloyd, Mr. Hogun, and Mr. Smith, who was a Pai)ist Priest, with scores of oilier persons who formerly resided in Montreal, all express their unqualified belief of the statements made by Maria Monk. Mr. Ogden's acquaintance with the facts, as Attorney General, and that of other officers of the Provincial Government, have also been noticed. The ensuing additional circumstances are of pri- mary importance to a correct estimate of the value which should be attached to the crafty silence of the Boman Priests and the impudent denials of iutidel. profligates. Mr. Boutiiillier, one of the Montreal Magistrates, called at Mr. Johnson's house where Maria Monk stayed, in the month of August, 1835, when visiting Montreal. He addressed her and said: — " Tijere is some mystery about Novices — What is it? and asked how long a woman must be a novice before she can take the veil?" Having been answered, Mr. Bouthillier tiien desired Maria Monk to describe the Supe- rior of the Hotel Hieu Nunnery. As soon as it was done, he became enraged , and said — " Vous dites un mensonge, vous en savez. You lie, you know you do?" — ^Mr. Bouthillier next in- quired — " Was Mr. Tabeau in the Holy Retreat when you left the Convent ?" She answered " Yes." To which he repUiad in REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. 213 French — " Anybody might have answered that question." Sotiielhii)^' having boon tmid about the Hutcl Dieu Nuns being oontined io tiieir convent, Mr. Bouthillier dechired, that they were ulluwed to go almut the streets. He was told that could not be the case, for it wus a direct violation ot" the rules for Nuns to depart from the Uotel Dieu Nunnery. He replied — *' Ce n'est i)as vrai. Tliat is not true," Mr. Boutliillier then becajne very angry, and ap[)lied to Maria Monk some very abu- sive epithets, tor which a gentleman in the room reproved him. it wus evident, that he lost his temper because he had lost his argument, and his hopes of controverting her statements. On tlio Lord's day after Maria Monk's arrival in Montreal, and when the matter had become well known and much talked about, Phelan, ihe Priest, at the end of mass, addresssed the Pa- pists, who were assembled to hear mass, to this effect: "There is a certain nun in this city who has left our faith, and joined the Proiestants. She has a child of which she is ready to swear I am the father. She wishes in this way to take my gown from me. If 1 kiiew where to tind her, I would put lier in prison. I mention this to guard you against being deceived by what she may say. The Devil now has such hold upon people that there U danger lest some might believe her story." Ho then pretend- ed to weep, and appeared to be overcome with feeling. A number of the people gathered around him, and he said : " That nun is Antichrist. She is not a human being, but an evil spirit, who got among the Catholics and was admitted into ihe nun- nery^ whore she learned the rules." He also stated, that " in that nun, the prophecy respecting the coming of Antichrist is fullilled, to break down the Catholic religion." Such was Phe- lau's address to the people. He declared that Maria Monk had been a Dun. Now he knew her, for he saw her in Montreal, where she cou'.d not know him. It would have saved all further inquiry and research, if, instead of denouncing her after mass, he had merely assented to Maria Monk's proposition, to be con- fronted with those Roman Priests and nuns before impartial witnesses in the Hotel Dieu Convent. One of the most impressively characteristic circumstances wliich occurred during Maria Monk's visit to Montreal in Aug. 1835, was an interview at Mr. Johnson's house with a carpenter who liad heard Phelan's denunciation of Maria Muuk after mass. Refer to page 177. The heinous destruction of all domestic confidence and of all female purity, is known io be the constant and general practice, not only in Canada, but in all other Popish countries, and among Papists in every part of the world. Tor in truth it is only fultilling the authentic dogmas of their own system. The follow- ing authoritative principles are divulged in the Corpus Juris Can- » !,■ 'il J' 214 REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. onjci, wliioh oontnins tlie Docretnls, Cnnons, &c. of the Popes and Cnuiu'ils; and otiier ixirticiptints of the pretended Papal iiitidlil*iiity. ^^If tlie Pope fall into homicide or adultery, ho cannot be accused, but is excused by the murders of 8atiiHon, and tlie adultery of I>avid." llujfo, Glnssn, distinc. 40 Cliapter, Non vos. — "Likewise if any Priest is found embracing a woman, it h ust be f)resuppo8ed and expounded that he doth it to blnss her!" — Gh)S8a, (Jans. 12. Quest. 8. Chapter Absis. According to the Pope's bull he who does not believe those doctrines is accursed. As that carpenter was completely overcome by tlie recollec- tion of the Priest's information and caution about his marriapro, he desisted from any further questions; but upon Maria Monk's declaration, that i*he was desirous to go into the convent, and prove all her accusations against the Priests and Nuns, he with- drew. Soon after he returned, and f'tated, that he had been to the Convent, to inquire respecting her; and that he had been informed, that she had once belonged to the Nunnery; but that they would not any longer own or recognise her. Afterwards lie exhibited the most contradictory emotions, and tirst cursed Maria Monk; then reviled the Priests, a]>plying to them all tlie loathsome epithets in the Canadian vocabulary. Subsequently, he went to make inquiries at the Seminary ; and after his return to Mr. Johnson's house he declared, that the persons there had informed him, that Maria Monk had lived in the Nunnery, but not as a Nun ; then he offered to assist her in her endeavours to expose the Priests ; and finally disappeared, swearing aloud as he was retiring from the house; and apparently thinking over the conduct of the Priest to his wife before their marriage. " Oh, saore!" — he repeated to himself — " c'est trop mechant I" Similar facts to the above occurred frequently during the time of Maria Monk's visit to Montreal — in wliich strangers who called upon her, cursed and reviled her; then believed her state- ments and assented to them — and displayed all the natural ex- citement which was necessarily comprised in the working of their own belief and convictions of the iniquity of the Priests, and the dread resulting from their own superatitious vassalage, and the certainty of a heavy penance. But in connexion with the preceding collateral evidence is another remarkable circumstance, whicii is this: the extensive knowledge which Maria Monk has obtained of the Canadian Jesuits. Those with whom she has been acquainted, she atiHrms that-»lie could instantly identify. For that object, fhe has given a catalogue of those Priests whose names and persons are in some degree familiarly known to her. As the Priests are often changing their abodes, and many of them resident.3 in Montreal until a vacancy occurs for them in the country parishes, in those R E V I E W O F T H K W HO I. K SUBJECT. 215 pftrticuliir.s tliero iimy l)o a trlflinpf mistnko; but Mnrift Monk solfiiiiily iivcru, tliat ilio IMisis, wlullier (U-nd or livin^f, wliouro caiiiiu't'ated ill tliu suhHcqiietit catalogue, either have ilsveltordo yel reside in the )>hices hpecilied. When unexpectedly and clo>el}' examined in rot'erencu to the PriestH of the »aine name, 8he piirticidurly distingt)i>lied them, and pointed outtheditVereru^ lietween them in their persons, gait, &C. ; tiius precluding all objection from tlio fact of there being more than one I'ricst with a similar aopelUitivo. This circumstuneo ])nrtictdarly is illustra- ted by the Priests named Marcoux, o' whom she says there aro three brothers or first cousins — two called Dufresne, &c. : each of whom she graphically depicts, li is also certain, because she has done it in a great variety of instances, and in the presence of many different perf-on.% all of whom are well acquainted with then), that she describe.^ Lartigue ; Dufresne ; liichard ; Phelan; Botnn; Comte; Bourget; McMahon ; Kelly; Demers; Iloux; Roque ; Sauvage; Tabeau ; Marccux ; Morin; Durocher; and all the Roman Priests around Montreal, with the utmost minuteness of accuracy; while the Chaplain of the Ur^ullno Nunnery at Quebec, Father Daul6, is as exactly depicted by her, AS if her whole life bad been passed under his surveillance. Borne of the appellatives in the ensuing catalogue may not be correctly spelt. Scarcely any thing is more difficult than to acquite proper names inaforeign language; and especially where the pronunciation itself is provincial, as is the case with Cana- dian French ; and when also those titles have to be transcribed from the nxmth of a person who knows no more of orthoepy and orthography than a Canadian Nun. However, Maria Monk attests, that the Priests to whom she refers did reside at those places which she has de^ignated, and that she has seen them all in the Hotel Dieu Nunnery — some of them very often, and others on a variety of occasi«ms. Nothing is more improbable, if not impossible, than that any Papist girl should have such an extensive acquaintance among Roman Priests. In Canada especially, where the large majority of females liave little more correct knowledge of that which occurs out of their own district than of HerscheVs astronomical discoveries, young women cannot be personally familiar with any Priests, in ordinary cases, except those who may have been " Cur6s " of the parish in which they reside, or of the immedi- ate vicinity, or an occasional visitor durinc the absence, or sick- ness, or death of the resident Curate or Missionary. Notwith- Bbmding, Maria Monk delineates to the life, the prominent fea- tures, the exact figure, and the obvious characteristic exterior habits and personal appearance of more than one hundred and fifty of those Priests, scattered about in all parts of Canada. Among others she particularly specifies the following men : but Bome of whom she notes as dead. Others she has named, bat I ;l.l (li. 216 REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. as her recollections of them are less distinct, they are not euumerated. Jean Jacques Lnrtigiie, Bishop of Tehnese, Montreal. Tiio Irish Priest McMaiiou, who has resided both in Montreal and Quebec. M. Dufreene, St. Nicholas. L. Cadieux, Vicar General, Three R'vers. F. F. Marcoux, Maskinonge. S. K Dumoulin, Yamaciiiche. A. Leclerc, Yomaska. V. Fournier, Bale du Febre. J. Demers, St. Gregoire. 0. B. Oourtain, Gentilly. T. Pepin, St. Jean. Ignace Bourget, Montreal. The Priest Moor, Missionary. J. 0. Prince, Montreal. J. M. Sauvage, Montreal. J. Comte, Montreal. J. H. A. Koux, Vicar General, Montreal. J. Roque, Montreal. A. Malard, Montreal. A. L. Hubart, Montreal. A, Satin, Montreal. J. B. Roupe, Montreal. Nic. Dufresne, Montreal. J. Richard, Montreal. 0. Fay, Mon- treal. J. B. St. Piene, Montreal. F. Bonin, P.. Phelan, Mon- treal. T. B. M'Mahon, Perce. J. Marcoux, Oa'ghnawaga. 0. De Bellefeuille, Lake of two Mountains. Claude Leonard, Montreal. F. Durocher, Lake of two Mountains. G. Belmont, St. Francis. F. Demers, Vicar General, St. Denis. J. O. Giroux, St. Bei^>it. J. B. St. Germain, St. Laurent. J. D. Delisle, St. Cesaire. J. M. Lefebvre, St. Genevieve. F. Pigeon, St. Philippe. A. Duransau, Lachine. O. Olievrefils, St. Constant. Joseph Quiblier, Montreal. Francis Humbert, Montreal. J. Arraud, Montreal. O. Archambault, Montreal. J. Larkin, Montreal. F. Sery, Montreal. R. Larre, Montreal. A. Macdonald, Mon- treal. F. Larkin, Montreal. J. Beauregard, Montreal. R. Rob- ert, Montreal. J. Fitz Patrick, Montreal. J. Toupin, Montreal. W. Baun, Montreal. T. Filiatreault, Montreal. J. Brady, Mon- treal. P. Trudel, St. Hyacinth. John Grant, St. Hyacinth. J. Delaire, Chambly. J. Desautels, Charably. P. D. Ricard, St. Joachim. Jan. Leclaire, Tsle Jesus. F. M. Turcot, St. Rose. C. Larocque, Berthier, T. Brassard, St. Elizabeth. J. B. Keller, St. Elizabeth. J. Ravienne, Lanorate. J. T. Gagno, Valtrie. Gasford Guinguer, St. Melanie. L. Nicholas Jacques, St. Sulpice. J. Renucalde, St. Jaques. T. Can, St. Esprit. 0. J. Ducharme, St. Therese. J. Valli6e, St. Scholastique. J. J. Vinet, Argan- teuil. M. Power, Beauharnois. J. B. Labelle, Chateauguay. is. Bietz, St. Constant. P. Bedard, St. Rem!. 0. Aubry, St. Athanase. L. Vinet, Noyon. J. Roque, Noyon. J. Zeph, Carren. F. Berauld, St. Valentia. A. Maresseau, Longneuil. P. Brunet, . J. Odelin, Rounilli. J. B. Dupnis, . L. Nan, Rouville. A. O. Giroux, St. Marc. G. Marchesseau, . J. B. Belanger, St. Ours. H. Marcotte, Isle du Pads. E. Crevier, Yamaska. G. Arsonault, . Eusebe Durocher, D. Deals, St. Rosalie. F. X. Brunet, St. Dainase. J. A. Boisond, St. Pie. M. Quintal, St. Damase. L. Aubry, Points Oalire. P. Tetro, Beauharnois. B. Ricard, St. Constant. M. REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. 217 liii 1 irorli), M.'iskouclie. J. Crevier, Blairfindie. P. Orenier, Clm- teauguay. A. Diii-oclior, Pointe aux Trembles. P. Murcure, La Presentation. It. Gaulin, Dorcliester. II. L. Gironard, St. Ilya- cinthe. J, Paqnin, Blairfinde. E. Brassard, St. Polycarpe. J. Boii^sonnanlt, Riviere dos Prairies. F. N. Blanclict, Soiilanges. E. Lavoio, Blairiindie. J. B. Kelly, Sorel. E. Morriset, St. Cyprian. II. Hudon, Argenteuil. M. Brudet, St. ?tlartin. P. P. Arcliambault, Vaudreuil. J. B. Bouclier, La Prairie. J. Qiie- villlon, St. Ours. A. Chaboillez, Longueuil. P. J. Delaniothe, St. Scliolastiqne. T. Lagard, St. Vincent. J. Durocher, St. Benoit. Antoine Tabeau, Vicar General, Montreal. J. F. Hebard, St. Ours. F. A. Trudean, Montreal. M. J. Felix, St. Benoit. L. Lamothe, Bethier. J. Moirier, St. Anne. F. J. Dcgnisc, Vicar General, Varennes. J. B. Bedard, St. Denis. R, O. Brunsau, Vercheres. F. Portier, Terrebonne. P. D. Ivicard, Bertijier. L. Gagne, Lacheuaie. Joseph Belanger, Ohainbly. M. Blanchet, St. Charles. P. M. Mignanit, Chara- bly. F. Labelle, L'Assumption. F. Marcoux, St. Barthelemi. N. L. Amiot, Repentigny. J. B. Boucher, Chambly. P. Lafranc, St. Jean Baptiste. P. Robitaille, Monnie. F. De Bel- lefeuille, St. Vincent. M. Brassard, St. Elizabeth. P. Oousigny, St. Mathias. J. D. Daule, Quebec. It is readily admitted, that any person could take one of tho Eclesiastical Registers of Lower Canada, and at his option mark any number of the Roman Priests in the catalogue, and impute to them anj' crime which he pleased. But if the accu- ser were closely examined, and among such a multitude of Priests, who in all their clothing are dressed alike, were called upon minutely to delineate them, it is morally impossible, that he could depict more than a. hundred Priests dispersed from the borders of Upper Canada to Quebec, in as many diflferent parishes, with the most perfect aciferacy, unless he was per- sonally and well acquainted with them. Maria Monk, however, does most accurately describe all the Priests in ffte preceding catalogiife, and repeats them at the expiration of weeks and months ; and the question is this : how is it possible that she could have become acquainted with so many of that body, and by what means can she so precisely depict their external appearance ? — The startling, but the only plausible answer which can be given to that question is this ; — that she has seen them in the Nunnery, whither, as she main- tains,, most of them constantly resorted for licentious inter- course with the Nuns. One other connected fact may here be introduced. Maria Monk well knows the Lady Superior of the Charlestown Nun- nery. That acquaintance could not have been made in the United Statea, because Saint Mary St. George as she called hep- 10 if i?:!.;-' I 1' 1 1 ;1^ 218 REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT self, or Sarali Bnrronglis, dangliter of the notorious Stephen Biirnnigbs, as is her real name, removed to Canada at tlie latter end of aMuy, 1835; nor couhl it iiave been prior to the estahli.«-li- nient of the Cliarlestown Nunnery, for at that i)eriod Maria Monk was u cliihl, and was not in any Convent except merely as a schohir; and Mary St. George was at Quebec, llow then did she become so familiar with that far-famed lady as to be able to \lescribe her so exactly? The only answer is, that she derived her knowledge of the Cliarlestown Convent and of its Superior, from the intimatioris given, and from intercourse with that Nun in the Hotel Dieu Nunnery. Young females often have been sent to the Nunneries in Canada under the fallacious hope of obtaining for tiiem a supe- rior education ; and very frequently, they are suddenly removed after being there but a short period; because the persons to whose partial j^aardianship they are committed perceive that they are in danger of being ensnared by the Chaplain and his female Syrens. But there are two otlier particulars in American Nunneries, the toleration of which almost surpasses credibility. In reference to girls, they are permitted to visit their friends, even when they reside in the vicinity of the Convent, only for an hour or two monthly — if their relatives are at a distance, they see them only during the annual vacation, and often remain in the Nunnery during that term. No correspondence is per- mitted between the mother, the guardian, the sister, or the frieids of the young female in the Nunnery School, on either side, without the inspection of the argus-eyed agent of the Institution. Parental advice, filial complaints, and confidential communications are equally arrested ; and only furnish to the Superiors of the establishment, artifices to thwart the Seniors, to entangle the Juniors, tf d effectually to cajole both parties. Consequently, it generally happens, that from one term to another, little or no intercourse exists between the youth and her relatives ; and it is indubitable, that where ttky letters do nominally pass between them, they are forgeries j the real letters being surreptitiously detained. Those felonious regulations fur- nish ample scope for the initiation of girls just entering upon ■womanhood, into all the wickedness of the Nunnery ; while the girls thetnselves are unconscious of the design, and the Nuns, those nefarious artificers of the iniquity, in subserviency to the Priests, in case of necessity, can Exculpate themselves apparently from all participation in tlie treachery and crimes. In the nunneries and conventual schools in the United States there is a sort of fairy land, talked about by the nuns to the elder girls. It is called the "Nuns' Island." That country is always described as an earthly paradise ; and to girls who are ainnenes, REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT, 219 ninnifestly fascinated by the witclieries of the nuns, and in •whom moral sensibility has become blunted by the unmeaning superstitions wliich the}' witness, and Avhich they mechanically perform, a visit to the "Nuns' Island," is always proposed as the greatest iirivilege, and the most costly reward, which can be given for constant obsequiousness to the nuns, and unre- served compliance with tJjeir requirements. The term " Nuns- Island," is thus used to express the nunneries in Canada, and probably some similar institutions in the United States, where they are not too dltficult of access. At all events, girls just entering upon the character of women, after proper training, are finally gratified with a visit to the " Nuns' Island." They are taken to Montreal, and in the nunneries there are at onco taught "the mystery of iniquity;" in all the living reality which Maria Monk describes. Those girls from the United States, who are represented as novices; in Maria Monk's "Awful Disclosures," were young ladies from the United States, who had been decoyed to visit the " Nuns' Island," and who, not being Papists, often were found very intractable ; but pos- terior circumstances enforce the belief, that having found resis- tance vain, they liad not returned to their school %re they were duly qualified to continue the course into which they had been coerced, so as fully to elude all possibility of discovery and exposure. That mother who intrusts her daughter to a nun- nery school, is chargeable with the high crime of openly con- ducting her into the chambers of pollution, and the path to irre- ligion, and the bottomless pit. These combined circumstances satisfactorily prove that the narrative of Maria Monk should be believed by all impartial per- sons ; at least, until other evidence can be adduced, and the ofifer of exploring the Hotel Dieu Nunnery, by tiie New York Pro- testant Association, has been acceptA and decided. 3. Additional evidence of the truth of Maria Monk's narrative is deduced from the exact conformity of the facts which she states concerning 4le Hotel Dieu NunnS^^ when compared with the authoritative principles of the Jesuit Priesthood as recorded in their own duly sanctioned volumes. It is essential to remark, that of those books she knows nothing; that she has never seen one of them, and if she could grasp them, that they would impart no illumination to her mind, being in Latin ; and yet in many momentous particulars, neither Lartigue nor any one of the Jesuit Priests now in Montreal, who was educated in France, could more minutely and accurately furnish an expo- sition or practical illustratiim of the atrocious themes, than Maria Monk has unconsciously done. Maria Mt)nk'8 " Awful Disclosures," are reducible to three classes: intolerable sensuality; diversified murder; and most « i! m ■r I -I « '1, -M ;i!;:'!i ' i M". i.i i' Mm f.M It 5i t 220 REVIEW I' T II K WHOLE SUBJECT scandalous inc ndaeify ; ooinprelicndiiig flagrant, and obdurate, and nncea^iiig vj(»]ati()ns of tljo sixth, isevunth, and ninth coin- mandiiicnts. llie ninth commKidment : Falsehood. Of this baseness, five specimens only nliall siifKoe. Sanchez^ a very renowned author, in Ins work on " Morality and tiie Precepts of the Decalogue," part 2, book 3, chap. 6, no. 13, thus decides: "A person may take an oath that he has not done any certain thing, though in fact he has. This is extremely convenient, and is also very just, when necessary to your hcaltii, honour, and prosperity!" Charli, in his Propositions, no. 6, affirms that, " He who is not bound to state the truth before swearing, is not bound by his oath." Taberna in his vol. 2, part 2, tract 2, chap. 31, p. 288, asks: "Is a -witness bound to declare the truth before a lawlul judge ?" To which he replies : " No, if his deposition will injure himself or his posterity." Lay- mann^ in his works, book 4, tract 2, chop. 2, p. 73, proclaims : '• It is not sufficient for an oath, that we use the formal words, if we had not the intention and will to swear, and do not sin- cerely ifivoke God as a witness." All those principles are sanc- tioned by Stiarez in his " Precepts of Law," book 3, chap. 9, assertion 2, p. 473, where he says, " If any one has promised or contracted without intention to promise, and is called upon oath to answer, may simply answer, no ; and may swear to that denial." Tiie idea of obtaining truth, therefore, from a thorough-going Papist, upon any subject in which his " AowoMr," is concerned — and every Papist's honour is indissolubly conjoined with '' the Church" — is an absurdity so great, that it cannot be listened to with patience, while the above decisions are the authorised dog- mas which the Roman Priests inculcate among their followers. How well the nuns of Mcmtreal have imbibed those Jesuitical instructions, Maria Monk's " Awful Disclosures" amply reveal. The Sixth Commandment: Murder. The following mis- cellaneous decisions are extracted from the work^f the regu- larly sanctioned Roman authors, of the very highest character and rank in that community. In his famous volume called " Aphorisms," p. 178, Emman- uel Sa writes — " You may kill any person who may be able to put you to death — judge and witnesses — because it is self-de- fence." Henriquez, in his " Sum of Moral Theology," vol. 1, book 14, chap. 10, p, 859, decides that " a Priest is not criminal, if he kill the husband of a woman with whom he is caught in adultery." Airault published a number of propositions. One of them says, that " a person may secretly kill another who attempts to destroy his reputation, although the facts are true Avhich he pub- REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT 221 lished." The following must he cited in Lntin. " An licitnm sit mulieri ])rocnrare al)ortum ? Posset ilium exciitere, no lio- noreni suuni amittat, qui illi multo pretiosior est ipsa vita." "An liceat mulieri conjugatCB sumero pharnuicum sterilitutis? Ita satius est ut hoc faciat, quam ut marito debituni conjiigalo recuset." Censures 319, 322, 327. In his Moral Theology, vol. 4, book 32, sec. 2, problem 5, Eicohar determines, that " it is lawful to kill an accuser Avhose testimony may jeopard your life and honour." Guimeniua promulged 'his seventh Proposition in these words: " You may charge your opponent with false crimes to destroy his credit; and you may also kill him." Marin wrote a book called '' Speculative and Moral Tlie- ology.' In vol. 3, tract 23, disputation 8, sec. 6, no. 63, p. 448, are found the fallowing sentences : " Licet procurare abortum, ne puella infametur." That doctrine is admitted, " to evade personal disgrace, and to conceal the infamy of Monks and Ifuns.'^ No. 67, p. 429. In no. 75, p. 430, of the same work, Marin writes: " Navarrus, Arragon, Bannez, Henriquez, Sii, Sanchez, Palao, and others, all say, that a woman may use not only missione sanguinis, sed aliis medicamentis, etsi inde pereat foetus." With that doctrine also agrees Bgidiua, in his "ExpUcation of the Decalogue," vol. 5, book 5, chap. 1, doubt 4 ; and Diana in his work upon Morality, part 6, tract 8, resolu- tion 27, fully ratifies his sanction. Goiatus published a work which he entitled, "Morality," and in vol. 2, part 2, tract 5, chap. 9, sec. 8, p. 318, is the following edifying specimen of Popish morals : " Persons may inno- cently desire to be drunk, if any great good will arise from it. A son wlio inherits wealth by his father's death, mny rejoice that when he is intoxicated, he murdered his father." According to which combined propositions, a man may make himself drunk expressly to kill his parent, and yet be guiltless. Busenhaum wrote a work denominated " Moral Theology." which was enlarged and explained by Lacroix. In vol. 1, p. 295, is the following position : " Jn all the cases whero a man has a right to kill any person, another may do it ioY him." But we have already heard by Escobar that any Roman Priest has a right to kill Maria Monk ; and therefore any Papist may nmr- der her for them. Alagona, in his " Compend of the Sum of Theology," by Thomas Aquinas, question 94, p. 230, " Sums" up all the Romish system in this comprehensively blasphemous oracular adage. " By the command of God, it is laufxil to murder the innocent, to rob, and to commit lewdness ; and thus to fulfil hia mandate, is our duty^ 27ie seventh commandment. — In his Aphorisms, p. 80, and' m 4 ^1 lililipHi ^1l!! il i I ii I 1^: ' t; i H! vm 222 REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. p. 259, triict them, by asking the most tihliy questions. I was confiiK'd to my bed three days from my lirst confession ; and thougiit I would never go again, being so abashed l)y the abom- inations be liad put in my liead. I would just as soon recom- mend scahling water to cure Antliony's-fire, or a wet besures ;" contirmed by the Canadian car- penter in Mr. Jolmson's house at Montreal ; and ratified by Pope Gregory XIII. in tlie Decretals and Canons, in the Corpus Juris Canonici. Secrets of Nunneries disclosed by Scipio de Ricci. p. 217. The Nunneries in Italy during the present generation are of the same description. Maria Catharine Barni, Maria Magdalen Sicini, and Vicioire Benedetti, of the Nunnery called. Santa Croce; all acknowledged, that they had been seduced at confes- sion, and that they had habitually maintained criminal inter- course with a Priest called Pacchiani, who absolved his guilty companions after the commission of their crimes. Secrets of Nunneries disclosed by Scipio de Ricci. pp. 60, 01. Six Nuns of the Convent of Catharine at Pistoia declared that the Priests who visited the Convent committed a " thousand in- decorous actSi They utter the worst expressions, saying that we should look upon it as a great happiness, that we have the power of satisfying our appetites without the annoyance of children ; and that we should not hesitate to take our pleasures. Men, who have contrived to get the keys, come into the Con- vent during the night, which they have spent in the most dissi- pated manner." That is the precise delineation of the Canadian Nunneries; into which other men besides Priests are admitted, if the parties are willing to pay the entrance bribe to the Chap-- lain. — Secrets of Nunneries, by Scipio de Ricci. pp. 80, 81. Flavia Perraccini, Prioress of the Nunnery of Catharine of Pistoia, revealed what she knew of that and other Nunneries. All the Priests "are of the same character. They all have the same maxims and the same conduct. They are on more intimate terms with the nuns than if they were married to them. It is the same at Lucia, at Pisa, at Prato, and at Perugia. The Supe- riors do not know even the smallest part of the enormous wick- edness that goes ou between the Monks and the Nuns." — Secrets of Nunneries, by* Scipio de Ricci. p. 93. That statement is so exactly conformed to Maria Monk's " Awful Disclosures," that were it not a fact that she had never seen Scipio de Ricci's work it might almost be supposed that some part of her narrative had been transcribed from it. Foggini of Rome, also wrote to Scipio de Ricci and informed him — " I know a monastery in which a Jesuit used to make the Nuns lift np their clothes, assuring them that they thereby per- formed an act of virtne, because they overcame a natural repng- -Secreta of Nunneries, p. 101. That is a very extraor- 10* nance. )» III'!' ^liijii 11 if h fc m i\ lii I ) i'l 226 REVIEW OP THE WHOLE SUBJECT. dinnry illnstrntlon of tlie turpitude of the Roman Priesthood; because that doctrine is a principle which they constantly incul- cate; and such is the invariablo practice in the Hotel Dieu Nun- nery, that the Nuns were obli;?ed to fulfil, for the beastly graii- lication of the Roman Priests who visitetl that house, which is '' the way to hell, going down to the chambers of death." Pro- verbs 7 : 27. It is superfluous to multiply similar extracts. Scipio de Ilicci was a Popish prelate, regularly commissioned by the Grand Duke of Tuscany to explore the Nunneries ; and in consequence of his authentic developments, the Jesuits and Dominicans, and the dignifled Papal ecclesiastics, with the two Popes, Pius VI. and Pius VII. all opposed, reviled, condemned and worried him almost to death. One quotation more shall close this survey. Pope Paul III. maintained at Rome, forty-five thousand courtesans. Pope Sixtns IV. ordered a number of edifices to be erected expressly for the accomodation of the semi-Nuns of Rome, from whose Impurity he derived a large annual revenue, under the form of a license; besides which, the prices of absolution for the diflerent violations of the seventh commandment are as regularly fixed as the value of beads, soul-masses, blessed water, and every other article of Popish manufacture. Paolo, Ilist. Council de Trent. Book I. Anno 1537. The preceding observations, it is believed, will remove the doubts from the mind of every impartial inquirer, respecting the credibility of Maria Monk's narrative : neverihelcGs, a few ad- liitional remarks may not be irrelevant : especially as there ib a marvellous skepticism in reference to the admission of valid tes- timony concerning the Roman priesthood, their system and practice. Wo are deafened with clamour for proof to substan- tiate Maria Monk's history : but that demand is tantamount to the declaration — " I will not believe." In anticipcition of speedy death, and an immediate appearance at the dread tribunal of Jehovah, Maria Monk communicated to Mr. Tappan, the Chaplain at Bellevue, one of the benevolent in- stitutions belonging to the city of New York, the principal facts in her " Awful Disclosures." After her unexpected recovery, she personally appeared at Montreal, expressly and openly, to promulge her allegations of atrocious crimes against the chief Roman Ecclesiastics in that city, who were armed with power, and having nearly all the population her infuriated enemies. There she remained almost four weeks, constantly daring the Roman Priests and Nuns in vain. It is true. Dr. Robertson in his affidavit says, that he was willing " to take the necessary steps for a full investigation, if a direct charge were made against any particular individual of a criminal nature." Now REVIEW OF THE WUOLE SUBJECT. 227 if Afftria Monk's chftrges are not direct, op a crimixal nature, niul jiguinst rARTiciii.An individuals — wlmt charges cuii bo so cliaiactei-ized ? TIjo fact is this : — Dr. Robertson would no more daro to issue a warrant for tlio apprehonsion of Laitiguo, or any of the inferior Kon;aii Priests in Montreal, than ho \v«>uld daro publicly to Btriko the Coniniander of the Garrison, or the Governor of Caiuida upon military parade. If any Papist had stated to him the same facts concernin«j a Protestant, or Protes- tant Miiiister, and otFered to confirm them by his worthless oaih, lie would liave issued his process at once ; but Dr. Kobert>on knows, that in the present state of Canadian society, lionjau Priests can do what they please; and no man dares to reprove, mucii less to " take any necessary steps for a full investigation " of their crimes. If the Jesuits and Nuns at Montreal are anxious for a full and impartial scrutiny of the Hotel Dieu Convent, Maria Monk is ready to oblige them with some facilities for that object ; provided she may carry them out to all their extent and application. Mr. Ogden has one affidavit, and knows the whole matter; as can incontestably be proved by Mr. A. P. Hart, an Attornev of Montreal ; and we recommend Dr. Robertson to ifsue his warrant for the apprehension of Lartigue, Bonin, Du- fresne, and Richards, they are enough to begin with ; and if Mr. Ogden will carry the facts with wich he is acquainted to the Grand Jury, one witness in New York is ready to ap[)ear; and Dr. Robertson will find his hands full of employment, if he will only " take the necesj?ary steps " to procure two or three persons who shall be pointed out *o him in the Hotel Dieu Nunnery. Therefore, until Dr. Robertson commences ecme incipient measures as a Magistrate towards " the necessary steps for a full investigation," as lie says, we shall be forced to believe, that the printer made a mistake in his affidavit, and put willing for un- willing. The cavilling call, however, for additional evidence to be ad- duced by Maria Monk, is manifestly futile. That testimony is within the jurisdiction of the Priests alone who are critninated. Maria Monk reiterates her charge against the Romish Ecclesias- tics of Canada and their Nuns; and she has solemnly sworn that they are true. What more can she do? Nothing, but to search the pi'emise.'i, to see whether the statements which she has made are correct. A Committee of the New-York Protestant As^o- ciation are willing to accompany her to Montreal; to walk 'through the Hotel Dieu Nunnery in company with any Gentle- men of Montreal, and investigate the truth without lavmir or partiality, Maria Monk is willing to submit the whole att'air to that sliort, and easy, and sensible test ; in which there is no possibility of deception. It does not depend upon credibility of witnesses, confficting evidence, personal friendship, or religious i I'' f t l-f 228 REVIEW OF THE WHOLE SUBJECT. prejudice!) ; it is reduced at once to that unerring criterion ; tht tight and the touch ! But, it is retorted, that will not bo granted ; then we re- peat anutlier proposal : let the Priest Conroy come forth girdvd in nil the panoply of the Roman court, and appear as the cham- pion of the Canadian Jesuits ; let him institute an action, civil or ci'iniinal, or both, against the publishers of such atrocious crimes, which, as they pretend, are falsely alleged against the lioman Priests. If Lartigue and his Montreal inferior priests are implicated in the most nefarious felonies, Maria Monk has ])ublished him as a virtuous acooraplice. Why does he not put her truth to the test, by subjecting her to a criminal process ? Why does he not commence a suit against the Booksellers who published her " Awful Disclosures ?" — Ah 1 if Lartigue, Bonin, Dufresne, and liichards, with their brethren, Conroy, Plielan, Kelly and Quarter, were coerced to keep Lent, and live only upon soup-maigre, until that day arrives, they would not mucli longer portray in their exterior, that they live upon the fat of the land ; but they would vociferously whine out — " Mea culpa I O mea grandis culpa ! O mea grandissima culpa ! Peooava t Pecoavi t Peocavi 1" W APPENDIX. RECEPTION OF THE FIRST EDITIONS. '\ I UATE now reached the close of what appeared in my firdt editions. Some of my readers may feel a wish to know what has been said of me and my book, by those whose characters or connexions it exposes. Different persons have expressed to me their fears that I should be kidnapped, 8tabl)ed or poisoned ; but of this I have had but little ap- prehension. Others may suppose that the priests of Montreal, and some of those in New York, against whom I have made different charges, may have appeared against me in ways of which they are ignorant, and have published facts, or used arguments of serious im- port, if not of decided force. For the information of my readers, I have determined, though at some inconvenience, to lay before them a fair view of what they have done. I was well convinced before the publication of my first book, that the priests would do or say very little against me or my work ; and several persons can testify, that I made declarations of this kind, with distinctness, in their presence. The reasons I gave for this opinion were these,— that they feared an investigation, and that they feared further disclosures. They must desire to keep the public mind calm, and diverted with other matters ; and to avoid increasing my will. There were individuals, I was well aware, both in and out of the nunnery, and Seminary, who, Lum the first notice of the appearance of my book, would be extremely disquieted, until they had ascertain- ed the extent to which my developements reached. When they had read for themselves, I well knew, they would enjoy a temporary re- lief, finding that my '' Disclosures" were not the most '' awful" which they had reason to expect. I also felt, that they would apprehend something further from me ; and that a dread of this would probably keep them quiet, or confine them to general denials of my story. And this has been the case, even to so great a degree, that the remark has been often repeated — 230 APPENDIX. how feeble is their defence I Why did they not rather remain si- lent than do so little— that which is for thorn worse than nothing? The causes of this I could assign. Tlic world does not understand them all. Three principal grounds of opposition have been taken against me by ray enemies — Ist, That I had never been in the Hotel Dieu Nunnery : 2d, That my character entitled me to no confldence ; 3d, That my book was copied, " word for word, and letter for letter," from an old European work, called " The Gates of Ilell opened." Besides these grounds, several others have been attempted, but less seriously sup- ported — such es that I was deranged, or subject to occasional aliena- tion of mind ; and that I was not Maria Monk, but a counterfeit of a person by that name, still in Canada, and, as some said, in tbo Black Nunnery. With regard to the first of these grounds, I will here simply say, that it has been, beyond controversy, the principal one, but has re- cently been abandoned. The great object of the six afiBdavits, pub- lished in Montreal in November, 1835, and republished here soon after the publication of my book, was to prove that I had never been a nun — not even a novice. The reader may judge for himself, for those affidavits are published in full in this volume, and they are the only ones which have been published against me. The reader will also see in an extract from the New York Catholic Diary of March last that that fact is admitted ; and by a later extract from it, that a Canadian priest who takes the trouble to write from Sherbrooke, has no new testimony to refer to. As to my character, I never claimed the confidence of the American people, (as the Roman priests do,) on a pretence of a peculiar holiness of life. That would have been unreasonable in a stranger, and espe- cially one who had been in a nunnery. My first editions, as well as the present, bear witness that I appealed to the evidence of facts which no one could controvert if once produced — an examination of the interior of my late prison. Not a lisp has yet been heard of as- sent to my proposition. The Protestant Association have published a challenge, for several weeks, which is on another page among the extracts — but no one has accepted it, and I will venture to say, no one .will. My publishers, on seeing the assertion made by the editor of the Boston (Roman Catholic) Pilot, that my book was a mere copy from an old European work, called " The Gates of Hell opened," published an offer of $100 for any book so resembling it — without Buccess. If hM RECEPTION OF THE WORK. 231 there be any volume on earth which contains the developments of any fugitive nun, whose case resembled my own, I should expect to merit such a title as the above ; and I should know how to excuse the author for using so strong an expression, after struggling, as I have had to do, ingiviugmy own narrative, with those feelings which are so apt to arise in my heart at the recollection of scenes I have passed through. The opening of the Gates of Hell, whether in a Eu- ropean or a Canadian Convent, may probably disclose scenes very like to each other ; but if there be any resemblance between my book and any other in the world, I solemnly declare that it can be owing only to a resemblance between the things described in both, as not a sentence has been copied from any book whatever, and I defy the editor ol the Boston Pilot — (not to perjure himself, as he gratuitously proposed — but to do what would be at once much more difficult and satisfactory) — produce his book, or a single page of it. I have been charged with occasional alienation of mind — a very strong evidence, I should think, of my being a nun ; for what eloped nun ever escaped that charge? Like converted Roman CatholicSy run-away nuns are commonly pronounced to be out of their wits, or under the influence of evil spirits, of course, on the ground that it is proved by the fact itself. As to my being the real Maria Monk or not, I presume the test! mony of some of my old school-mates, now in New- York, will pass. To these, however, it cannot be necessary to resort, otherwise the Montreal affidavits will be good for nothing. I will now proceed to give the whole of the testimony which has been brought out against me. A few remarks, necessary to acquaint the reader with the progress of things, will be given in their place. Next to these will appear the testimony of several persons, who havo voluntarily presented themselves, since the publication of my first edition, claimed acquaintance with me, and volunteered their testi- mony. I need not say how gratifying I have found sucli spontaneous marks of kindness, from friends, whose reedy and unsolicited appear- ance is a real favour to me, although chiefly due, as they declare, to their love of truth and justice. Almost immediately after the nppoara.^ce of my '• Awful Disclo- sures," the following anonymous handbill waa distributed through the city of New- York. It was also published in the Catholic Diary, and other papers, with violent denunciations. ill \i I f 232 APPENDIX " Maria Monk ! Villany Exposed. " VAmidu Peuple, a Montreal paper, gives us the denouement of the tale of scandal which the Protestant Vindicator, Christian Herald, et id genus omne, put forward a few months since, and which the Protestant Editors of three political journals in Montreal, at once indignantly repelled without knowing its origin. Instead of an eloped Nun, recounting the horrors of the Convent, the heroine of the tale is a Protestant young girl, who has been for four years past under protection of a Mr. Hoyte, once styled a Reveren* Metho- dist Preacher, and connected with Canadian Sunday Schools. The paper quoted above, gives, at full length, the affidavits of the mother of the girl, who is also a Protestant, and of several other individuals, who had no motive to favour Catholic Institutions. The disconsolate mother testifies on oath that she had been solicited by the seducer of her child to swear that she was a Nun, and that the father of the infant was a Catholic Clergyman — that a promise had been made her of a comfortable provision for herself, and for her unfortunate child and offspring — if she would only do that. The poor woman had virtue enough to reject the base proposal ; and thus, the Rev. Mr. Hoyte, who had returned from New- York for this purpose, accom- panied, it is stated, by the Rev. Mr. Brewster and Judge Turner, failed in the object of his visit. ';ht prc< vent some mischief that was ^oing on. Then I related to him partly what I have al>ove said. When he was going, two other gentlemen came. I refused to give them any information at first, expecting that they were of the party that had so much agitated me for a few days ; but being informed by Mr. Doucet, that he knew one of them, particularly Mr. Perkins, for a respectable citizen fur a long time in Montreal, and the other Mr. Curry, two ministers from the United States, that if they came to obtain some information about the dis- trcssing events she related to have occurred in her family, he thought it would do no harm, and I related it to them : they appeared to be afflicted with such a circumstance ; I have not seen them any more. I asked Mr. Doucet if the man lioyte could not be put in jail ; he re< plied that he thought not, for what he knew of the business. Then 1 asked if the Priests were informed of what was going on | he replied, yes, but they never take up these things ; they allow their character to defend itself. A few days after, I heard that my daughter was at one Mr. Johnson's, a joiner, at Griffintown, with Mr Hoyte ; that he passed her for a nun that had escaped from the Hotel Dieu Nunnery. I went there two days successively with Mrs. Tarbert ; the first day, Mrs. Johnson denied her, and said that she was gone to New Vork with Mr. Hoyte. As I was returning, I met Mr. Hoyte on the wharf, and I reproached him for his conduct. I told him that my daughter had been denied me at Johnson's, but that I would have a search-war- rant to have her ; when I returned, he had really gone with my un- fortunate daughter ; and I received from Mr. Johnson, his wife and a number of persons in their house, the grossest abuse, mixed with texts of the Gospel, Mr. Johnson bringing a Bible for me to swear on. I retired more deeply afflicted than ever, and further sayeth not. " Sworn before me, this 24th of October, 1835." if !.! (AFFIDAVIT OF NANCY M'OAN.) " Province of Lower Canada, } District of Montreal. J " Before me, William Robertson, one of His Majesty's Justices of the Peace, for the District of Montreal, came and appeared Nancy M'Gan, of Montreal, wife of James Tarbert, who has requested me to receive this affidavit, and declared that she had been intimately acquainted with Mrs. (widow) Monk, of Montreal, a Protestant woman. I know the said Maria Monk ; last spring she told me that the father of the child she then was carrying, was burned in Mr. Owsten's house. She often went away in the country, and at the request of her mother I accompanied her across the river. Last summer she came back to my lodgings, and told me that she had made out the father of the child ; and that very night left me and went away. The next morning I found that she was in a house of bad fame, where I went for ber, and told the womaa keeping that 240 APPENDIX, house, that i>l)c ought not to allow that girl to remain there, for eho wa8 a girl of good and honest family. Maria Monk then told me that {ihe would not go to him (alluding, as I understood, to the failior of the chihl), (or that he wanted her to swear an oath that would lodc her soul for over, but jestingly said, should make her a lady for ever. I then told her (Maria), do not lose your soul lor money. She told me she had swapped her silk gowa in the house where I had found her, for a calico one, and got some money to boot ; having previously told me if she had some money she would go away, and would not go near him any more, Soon after, Mr. lloyte and another gentleman came. Mr. Uoyte asked mo where she had slept the night previous, and that he would go for the silk gown ; the woman sliowed the gown, and told him that if he would pay three dollars he should have the gown ; he went away, and came back with Maria Monk, i)aid the three dollars and got the gown ; I was then present. '^ Being at Mrs. Monk's, I saw a child which she mentioned to be her daughter Maria's child. Some time after, Mrs. Monk requested me to accompany her to Griffintown, to look for her daughter. We went to Mr. Johnson's house, a joiner in that suburb ; we met Mr. Hoy to and he spoke to Mrs. Monk ; when at Mr. Johnson's, Mrs, Manly asked for her daughter ; Mrs. Johnson said she was not there. I saw Mr. Hoyte at Mrs. Monk's; he was in company with three other persons, apparently Americans, earnestly engaged in conversation, but so much confused I could not make out what was said ; and further sayeth not." her " Nancy + M'Gan. mark. '* Sworn before me, on this 24th October, 1835. " W. ROBERTSOxV, J. p.'' (AFFIDATIT OF ASA QOODEXOUGH.) «» Prof>ines of Lower Canada, ) IHMrict of Montreal. ) " Before me, William Eobertson, one of his Majesty's Justices of the Peace, for the District of Montreal, appeared Asa Goodenough, of Montreal, holder of the Exchange Coffee House, who, after having ' made oath upon the Holy Evangelists, declareth and sayeth, that on or about the nineteenth of August last, two gentlemen and a young female with a child, put up at the Exchange Coffee House, of which I am the owner ; they were entered in the book, one under the name of Judge Turner, the other as Mr. Hoyte, a Methodist preacher, and agent or superintendent for the establishment of Sunday-schools, &c. " Being informed by Catherine Conners, a confidential servant, that something mysterious was passing amongst the Above-named, which led me to call on them for an explanation, they answered in a very unsatisfactory manner. I afterward learned that the name of the young woman was Maria Monk, that her mother lived in town, that die was not married to Mr. Hoyte, and they came to Montreal K RECEPTION OF THE WO UK 241 with the viow, as Mr. Iloyto paid, to disclose tliu infamy of the J'riefls, whilst sho was at the Nunnery. 1 thoujjht it priulont to give inlurnuition of titis to u magistratu. Seeing Mv. Doucet'H natiie oa tlie list, I wont to him, and requested him to give information to the mother of the young woman, of the circumstances in which her daughter was. He did so, and the disclosure of the design of Mr. lli)yt(! was Uic coasequence. '•Montreal. "Asa Goodenougu." " The following affidavits have been translated from the L'Ami da Peuple, Montreal, Nov. 7, 1835." (AFFIDAVIT OF CATHARIXE COXXEES.) ** Province of Lower Canada, Ditftrict of JUotUrecU. f "Before me, W. Robertson, one of Ilia Majesty's Justices of the Peace for the District of Montreal, appeared Catherine Conners of Montreal, a servant in the hotel of Mr. Goodenougb, in the city of ^[ontrcal ; she having made oath on the Holy Evangelists, to say the truth and nothing Imt the truth, 'declared and said what follows : " Towards the 19th of August last, two men and a woman came to the Exchange Coffee House ; their names were written in the book, one by the name of Judge Turner, and the other as Mr. Hoyte ; the name of the woman was not written in the book, in which the names of travellers are written, because I was informed that they were taking a single room with two beds. Some time after a other room was given to them for their accommodation ; the woman passed for the wife of Mr. Hoyte. ■• "The day following, when I was making the bed, I found the woman in tears ; having made the remark to her that her child was a very young traveller, she replied that she had not the power to dis- pense with the journey, for they travelled on business of importance ; she also said that she had never had a day of happiness since she had lell Montreal, which was four years, with Mr. Hoyte ; she expressed a wish to go and see her father. She entreated me to try and procure secretly clothes for her, for Mr. Hoyte wished to dine with her in his own room, in which be was then taking care of the child. I gave her my shawl and bonnet, and conducted her secretly out by the street St. Pierre : she never returned, and left the child in the hands of Mr. Hoyte. She said that her husband was a Methodist preacher, and agent of the Sunday School for Montreal, in which he had resided four months last winter ; but she had not then been with him. When I returned to the room, Mr. Hoyte was still taking care of the child ; he asked me if I had seen his lady ; I said no. Upon this question he told me 'that the father of his lady was dead, that her mother yet lived in the suburbs of Quebec, and he a.sked me for all the clothes which I had given to wash for him, his lady and child ; clothes the iculy had taken from the only portmanteau which they had. Beyond that, I perceived nothing remarkable, except that Mr. Hoyte wished to conceal this woman, and to prevent her from going out I heard 11 .A J '. M 242 APPENDIX the judge say to him, ' now she is yours/ Sworn before mo the 2d November, 1835. (Signed) " W. Robbrtsox. ** Mary M'Caffrey, also a chambermaid in the hotel of Mr. Good- enough, corroborates the preceding deposition. (Signed) " W. Robektson." (APPIDATrr OF HENRT MCDONALD.) ** Province of Lowtr Canada, ) J>Utrict iff Montreal. f " Before me, W. Robertson, one of His Majesty's Justices of the Peace, for the District of Montreal, appeared Henry M'Donald, pby- sician, who, after talcing an oath on the Holy Evangelists to say the truth, declared, that in the month of August last, at seven o'clock in the evening, a young woman called at his house with all the symptoms of an extraordinary agitation, and in great distress. She asked his professional advice, complaining of great pains in the breast. On questioning her, he learned that she had a young child, which she said was ut Mr. Goodenough's, and that this child was taken away from her. She said that the father of the child was a Methodist Min- ister, and general agent of the Sunday-Schools. She told me his name, but I cannot recollect it. She told me that now and t^en her intellectual faculties were weakened in such a manner that she could not support herself. She told me that she would be under great obligation to me, if I would go to her mother's house, and get her child, and procure lodgings for her ; that she was without means, and did not know where to go. She could not remain with her mother, because she felt that her conduct had disgraced her family. I went in quest of Mrs. Monk, her mother ; she had just come in quest of her daughter, and they went away together from my house. (Signed) «Henrt M'Donald. " Sworn before me the 2d November, 1835. (Signed) ♦• W. Robertsox.'' (AFFIDAVIT OP MATTHEW BICHET.) 7b ih0^Uor of th4 Montreal Morning Courier. Sir, — Among the affidavits published in yonr paper of to-day, relating to Mr. Hoyte and Maria Monk, I observe a deposition by Mr. Goodenough, that when Mr. Hoyte, in the month of August last, put up at the Exchange Coffee-house, he was entered on the book as a Methodist Preacher, and .Sgent or Superintendant of Sunday Schools, &c. It has, however, been ascertained, from an examination of the book referred too, tiiat no official designation is appended in it to Mr. Hoyte's name. This discrepancy, Mr. Goodenough states, took place entirely through mistake, and he did not knrw that Mr. Hoyte was thus characterized in his affidavit till he saw it in print. JBut as a similar mistake has found its way into several of the depo- idtions which have been elicited by this unhappy affair, I deem it incumbent upo i me, as a regularly appointed Methodist Minister pf RECEPTION OF THE WORK. 243 » this olty, to declare that Mr. Iloyto has never bad any connexion with the Muthodittt Society, cither as a preacher or as an agent fur Sunday SchoolH ; and I would, at the Hamc time, exprens my hurpriHO and regret, that the JVew-York Protestant Vindicator chould have taken up, and industriously circulated, charges of ho grave a nature against the Priests and Nuns of this city, derived from so polluted a source. From such a species of vindication, no causo can receive either honour or credit. By giving this publicity, you will confer a favour on yours, rcfpectfully, " Matthew Uiciiet, "Montreal, Nov. 16, 1835. Wesleyan Minister." " AUhough we could produce several other affidavits, of an equally unimpeachable character as the above, yet wc deem the evidence advanced more than enough to show the entire falsehood and extra- vagance of the fabrications in the Protestant Vindicator." to-day, by Mr. Ast, put lok as a ^tinday ^inatioa ^ded in states, Ihat Mr. print. Le depo- beem it Uster of Here closes all the testimony that has been published or brought against me. It requires the suppression of my feelings to repeat v ) the world charges against myself and my companions, so unfoundet ., and paiqful to every virtuous reader. But I tnwt to the truth to sub- stantiate my narrative, and prefer that everj uiing should bo fairly laid before the world. That my opponents had nothing further to produce against me at that time, is proved by the following remark by the £ditor of the New York Catholic Diary, to be found in the Ttry paper in which he published the preceding affidavits :-- "Here, then, is the whole!" , In a N. Y. Catholic Diary of March last, is a letter from Father McMahon, a Missionary, dated at Sherbrooke, in Canada, in which, as will be seen by the extracts given beyond, he does not even allude to any other testimony than this. Of course my readers will allow that I have reason to say — " Here, then, is the whole I" The following extracts are given for several reasons. 1st. To prove, by the admission of my adversaries themselves, that no new testimony has been produced since the publication of the Mc-:/- iX affidavits. 2d. That no disposition is shown to bring the trnth to the only fair test — the opening of the Nunnery. 3d. That they are inconsistent in several respects, as, while they pretend to lea e the, oharacters of the priests and nuns to defend themselns. they labour with great zeal and acrimony to quiet public suspicion, and to dis- credit my testimony. 4th. Another object in giving these extracts is, to show a specimen of the style of most of the Roman Catholic ! ! 1 244 APPENDIX writers against me. In respect to argument, temper, and scarcity of facts. Father McMabon is on a level with the editors of the Diary and Green Banner, judging from such of their papers as I have seen. From FaVier McMalunCi Letter to the editor of the If. Y. Catholic Diary of March, 1836. "The silence by which you indulge the latent springs of a mal-pro- pense, so far from being an argument for culpability, is bused upon the charitableness of a conscious innocence, and is, therefore, highly commendable. I say it is highly commendable, inaf^much as these worthy and respectable characters do not deign to answer falsehood, or turn their attention from the^** sacred avocations by ettectually repelling allegations which all men, women, and children, able to articulate a syllable, in the city of Montreal, have repeatedly pro- nounced to be utterly false, detestably false, and abominably scan- dalous. ***** "iMay I now call upon you, honest Americans, who, though you may differ from me la doctrinal points of religion, have, I trust, tlie due regard for truth and charity towards all mankind ; and into whose hand that inftn^ent of Satan's emissaries may fall, before ^ou believe one sylla|mit oontains, attentively to peruse the follow- ing facts, which are l^fWrn tO all men of learning, of every persua- sion, and in every cotintry, and which you will find, by mature investigation, to serve as a sufficient key to discover the wicked falsehoods, circulated by the enemies of truth, in the work called, ' The Disclosures of Maria Monk,' but which, in consequence of the total absence of truth, from the things therein contained, I have termed (and I think jlbstiy on that account), the devil's prayer-book. I beseech you to give my statements a fair, but impartial trial, weigh correctly the arguments opposed to tliem, according to your judgment -«^do not allow yourselves tu be gulled by the empty or unmeaning phraseology of some of your bloated, though temperate, preachers. All I ank for the test of the following statement, is simply and solely the exercise of your common sense, without equivocation. '' 1st. I distinctly and unequivocally state, that the impugners of the Catholic religion and its doctrines, never dared to meet us in the fair field of argument. Never yet have they entered the lists in an erislical encounter, but to their cost. Why so? because we have reason, religion, and the impenetrable shield of true syllogistic argumentation in our favour. Witness, in support of the assertion, the stupid and besotted crew (pardon me for this expression, and And a proper term yourselves, for the politico-Theological Charlatans of England), who, not daring to encounter the Catholic Hierarchy of Ireland, in an honorable religious disputation, are forced to drag to their assistance those very apostates from Catholicity who were con- sidered by their superiors unworthy of the situation they attempted to hold in that Church ; for the purpose of propping up the stagger- ing and delmuched harlot, whose grave they are now preparing. Only rei:2Hrk how they are obliged to have recourse to tha exploded scholastic opiuions of Peter Dens, by way of showing tlie intolerance of the Catliolics, who repudiate the doctrine of religious intolerance. RECEPTION OF THE WORK 245 Uruiicc praacc. Maryland, Bavaria, and the Canton? of Switzerland, prove the con< trary by their universal religious toleration. Now I could mention, if 1 thouglit I had space enough on this sheet, nuraiwrs of ProtL'stnnt divines, who, in their writings, have strongly inculcated the absurd doctrines of ruling our consciences by the authority of the Civil Magistrates. See then, how strange it is, that they seek to condemn us for doctrines which we abhor, and which they practice, even to this day. Mark that for an argument against our doctrines. " 2dly. I assert, that notwithstanding all the persecutions, all the falsehood and defamation daily exercised against the Catholics and their religion, they are at this moment the only people on the face of the earth, who maintain amongst them the unity of the true faith, and the regular succession in the Ministry, from Christ and his Apostles. 3dly. I assert, that the late scandalous production against the Catholic Clergy of Montreal and the Catholic institutions there, is a tissue of false, fou), designing, and scandalous misrepresentation. 1st. Because upon strict examination into all its bearings, it has been so proved upon the solemn oaths of a magistrate and others concerned. 2dly. Because it is no way consonant to reason or common sense to sajr ^^^ those Uving at a considerable distance, and avowedly hostile t^ the Qlitiiolics and their reli- gion, should feel so interested ia Hfeh tt IMltter as the Catholics themselves, who are vitally concerned, an4 who had every facility of discovering any impropriety ; who are zeiTous of the purity of their religion and its Ministers. 3dly. Because the loud cry of all the inhabitants of every denomination, from the well-known integrity, the extraordinary piety, the singular charity and devoted ncss of the Catholic Clergy, came in peals of just wrath and well-merited indig- nation on the heads of the degenerate monsters who busely, but ineffectually, attempted to murder the unsullied fame of those whom they deservedly held, and will hold, in the highest estimation. • T. B. McMauon, Missionary.^^ Now this letter alludes to testimony legally given, as substantiating the charges against me. What testitnony is intended? Any new testimony? If so, where, and what is it ? I never heard of any, of any description, except what I have inserted on the preceding pages, unless I except the violent, unsupported, and inconsistent asscrtionH in newspapers, before alluded to. Has any testimony, legally given, been produced, which neither the Catholic Diary, nor any other Catho- lic paper, has either inserted or alluded to? No. The Missionary, McMahon, must refer to the Montreal affidavits; and since he has expressed his opinion in relation to their credibility and weight, I request my readers to form their own opinions, as 1 have put the means in their power. It may, perhaps, appear to some, an act displaying uncommon "concern" in my affairs, or those of the Convent, for Father i H 246 APPENDIX. McMahon to take the pains to write on the subject from Canada. I knovf more of hitn and his concerns than the public do; and I am glad that my book has reached him. Happy would it have been for him, if he could prove that he did not leave Sherbrookc from the day when I took the Black veil, until the day when I cast it off. There arc many able to bear witness against him in that institution (if they have not been removed), and one out of it, who could easily silence him, by disclosures that be has too much reason to apprehend. But to return — I assure my readers, then, that this book contains all the testimony that has been brought against me. so fur as I can ascertain. The extensive publication of the Montreal affidavits (for they appeared in the Roman Catholic papers, and were circulated, it is believed, very generally through New- York), for a time, almost entirely closed the newspapers against me. My publishers addressed the following letter to the editor of the N. Y. Catholic Diary, and waited on him with a third person, to request its publication in his next paper, but he dedllned. ^e expressed doubts of my being in the city, and intimated a wish to see me ; but when they acceded, ho refused to ^eet me anywhere but at hia own residence ! The same letter was then offered to other editors in New- York, and even sent to Philadelphia for publication, but refkised. It appeared on the 29th of February, in the Brooklyn Star, thus introduced :— 1« Extracts from the Long Island Star of Feb. 2Sth. » " Since the publication of our last paper, we have received a com- munication from Messrs. Howe and Bates, of New York, the publish- era of Miss Monk's < Awful Disclosures.' It appears that some influ- ences have been at work in that city, adverse to the free examination of the case between her and the priests of Canada ; for thus far the news papers have been almost entirely closed against every thing in her defence, while most of them have published false charges against the book, some of a preposterous nature, the contradiction of which is plain and palpable. • • » " Returning to New York, she then first resolved to publish her story, which she has recently done, after several intelligoiit and dis- interested persons had satislied themselves by much examination that it was true. •' When it became known in Canada that this was her intention, six affidavits were publinhed in some of the newspapers, intended to destroy confidence in her character ; but these were found very con- tradictory in several important points, and others to afi'ord under- signed confirmation of statements before made by her. " On the publication of her book, the New York Catholic Diary, the Truth Teller, the Green Banner, and other papers, made virulent RECEPTION OF THE WORK 24t attacks upon it, and one of them proposed that the publishers should be ' Lynched.' An anonymous handbill was also circulated in New York, declaring the work a malignant libel, got up by Protestant clergymen, and promising an ample refutation of it in a few days. This was re-publi^hed in the Catholic Diary, &c. with the old Montreal affidavits, which latter were also distributed thr'>.jgh New York and Brooklyn ; and on the authority of these, se- eral Protestant news- pupers denounced the work as false and malicious. *• Another charge, quite inconsistent with the rest, was also made, not only by the leading Uoman Catholic papers, but by several others at second hand — viz. that it was a mere copy of an old European work- This has been promptly denied by the publishei's, with the oiler of $100 reward for any book at all resembling it. " Yet, such is the resolution of some and the unbelief of others, that it is impossible for the publishers to obtain insertion for their re- plies in the New York papers generally, and they have been unsuc- cessful in an attempt iu Philadelphia. '* This is the ground on which the following article has been offered to us for publication in the Star. It was offered to Mr. Scbneller, a Roman priest, and editor of the Catholic Diary, for insertioa in his paper of Saturday before last, but refused, although written expressly as an answer to the affidavits and charges his previous number had contained. This article has also been refused insertion in a Philadel- phia daily paper, after it had been satisfactorily ascertained that there was no hope of gaining admission for it into any of the New York papers. " It should be stated, in addition, that the authoress of the book, Maria Monk, is iu New York, and stands ready to answer any ques- tions, and submit to any inquiries, put in a proper manner, and d&- eires nothing so strongly as an opportunity to prove before a court the truth of her story. She has already found several persons of respect- ability who have confirmed some of the facts, important and likely to be attested by concurrent evidence ; and much testimony in her favour may be soon expected by the public *' With these facts before them, intelligent readers will judge for themselves. She asks for investigation, while her opponents deny her every opportunity to meet the charges made against her. Mr. Schnel- ler, after expressing a wish to see her, to the pi'blishers, refused ta to meet her anywhere, wn/eM in his own house; while Mr. Quarter, another Homan Catholic priest, called to see her, at ten o'clock, one night, accompanied oy another man, without giving their names', and under the false pretence of being bearers of a letter from her brother in Montreal." r Reply to the Montreal Affidavits, rejmed puhlicationhy the Cat/iotic Diary Ac. *' To the Editor of the CuthoUc Diary. ^' Sir — In your paper of last Saturday, you published six affidavits from Montreal, which are calculated, so far as they are believed, to discredit the truth of the ' Awful Disclosures' of Maria Monk, a book of which we are the publishers. We address the following remarks to 248 APPENDIX you, with a request that you will publish them in the ' Catholic Diary,' that your readers may have the means of judging for themselves. If the case be so plain u one as you seem to suppui^e, tiiey will doubtleHS perceive more plainly the bearing and force of the evidence you present, when they see it brought into collision with that which it I3 designed to overthrow. ''First, We have to remark, that the affidavits which you publish might have becu furnished you in this city, without the trouble or delay oi sending to Montreal. They have been here two or three months, and were carefully examined about that period by persons who are acquainted with Maria Monk's story, and were desirous of ui-certalning the truth. After obtaining further evidence from Canada these aflidavits were decided to contain strong contirmatlon of various poluts in her story, then already written dowu, only part of which ius yet been published. -' Second. It is remarkable that of these six aiBdavits, the fu'st is that of Dr. Robinson, and all the rest are signed by him as Justice of the Peace | and a Justice, too, who had previously refused to take the affidavit of Maria Monk. Yet, unknown to himself, this same Dr. K., by incidents of his own stating, corroborates some very impor- tant parts of Miss Monk's statements. He says, indeed, that he has ascertained where she was part of the time when she professed to Lave been in the Nunnery. But his evidence on this point is merely hearsay, and he does not even favour us with that. " Tliird, One of the affidavits is that of Miss Monk's mother, who claims to be a Protestant, and yet declares, that she proposed . « ^end her infant grandchild to a Nunnery I She says her daughter has long been subject to fits of insanity, (of which, however, we can say no traces are discoverable in New York,) and has never been in a Nun- nery since she was at school in one, while quite a child. She however does not mention where her daughter has spent any part of the most important years of her life. A large part of her affidavit, as well as several others, is taken up with matter relating to one of the persons who accompanied Miss M. to Montreal last summer, and has no claim to be regarded as direct evidence for or against the authenticity of her book. •' Fourth, The affidavit of Nancy ^IcGan is signed with a cross, as by one iguoraut of writing ; and she states that she visited a houso of ill fame, (to all appearance alone,) although, as she asserts, to bring away Miss M. Her testimony, therefore, does not present the strong- est claims to our couQdencc. Besides, it is known that she has shown great hostility, to Miss Monk, in the streets of Montreal : and she would not, it is believed, have had much intlucnce on an intelligent court or jury, against Miss M., in that city, if the latter had been for- tunate enough to obtain the legal Investigation into hor charges, which as Dr. 11. mentions, she declared to be the express object of her visit to that city. In the last summer, and iu which she failed, after nearly a month's exertion. '• Fifth, The affidavit of Mr. Goodonough is contradicted in one point by the letter of Mr. Kichey, a Wesieyan minister, which you in- sert, and contains little else of any importance to this or any other cose. * • • • RECEPTION OF THE WORK 249 " Sixth, You copied in a conspicuous mauner, from a Catholic paper in Boston, a charge ap;ainst the book, the groufKMti'iinc'ss of which has been exposed iu t>oine of the Nt-w York p::pcr8. viz. that largo parts of it were, ' word for word and letter for letter,' (names only altered,) copied from a book published some years ago in Kuropc, under the title of ' The Gates of Hell opened.' We have not seen in your paper any correction of this ae^perhion, although the asi posed to befriend her. " She then told uie that her name was Maria, that she had been a nun in a nunnery in Montreal, from which she had made her escape, on account of the treatment she had received from priests in that institution, whose licentious conduct she strongly intimated to me. She mentioned some particulars concerning the Convent and her escape. She spoke particularly of a small room where she used to attend, until the physician entered to see the sick, when she accom- panied him to write down his prescriptions; and said that she escaped through a door which he sometimes entered. She added, that she exchanged her dress after leaving the nunnery, and that she came to New York in company with a man, who left her as soon as the steam- boat arrived. She further stated, that she expected soon to give birth to a child, having become pregnant in the Convent ; that she had no friend, and knew not where to find one ; that she thought of destroying her life ; and wished me to leave her — saying, that if I RECEPTION OF THE WORK 255 should hear of » woman being found drowned in the East River, she earnestly desired me never to npeak of her. *' I anked her if she had hud any food that day, to which she answered, no ; and I gave her money to j?et houio al tlio gr«)cery of Mr. Cox, in tiie neighbourhood, tilie left me, but I afterwurdrt saw her in the tields, going towurds the river ; and after much urgeury, prevailed upon her to go to a house where I tbouKht she niigiit Im) ucconiiuoduted, ottering to pay her expenses. Kiiiling in thisatlempt, I persuaded her, with much difficulty, to go the Almshouse ; and tbere we got her received, after I bad promised to call and see her, as she said she hud something of great consequence which she wished to conimuuicute to me, and wi»bed me to write a letter to Montreal. ''She had every appearance of telling the truth ; so much so, that I have never for a moment doubted the truth of her story, but told it to many persons of ray acquaintance, with entire contidence in its truth. She seemed overwhelmed with grief, and in a very desperate state of mind. I saw her weep for two hours or more without ceas- ing ; and appeared tery feeble when attempting to walk, so that two of us supported her by the arms. We observed also, that she always folded her hands under her apron when she walked, as she has described the nuns as doing in her ' Awful Disclosures.' " 1 called at the Almshouse gate several times and inquired for her ; but having forgotten half her name, I could not mukc it under- stood whom I wished to see, and did not see her until the last week. When I saw some of the first extracts from her book in a newspaper, I wasconlident that they were parts of her story, and when 1 read the conclusion of the work, I had not a doubt of it. Indeed, many things in the course of the book I was prepared for from what she had told me. *' When I saw h'r, I recognised her immediately, although she did not know me at first, being in a very ditterent dresa. As soon as she was informed where she had seen me, she recognised me. I have not found in the book any thing incotisistent with what she had stated lo me when I tirst saw her. " When I tirst found her in May, 1835, she had evidently sought concealment. She had a letter in her hand, which she refused to let me see ; and when sbe found I was determined to remove her, she tore it in small pieces, and threw them down. Several days after I visited the spot again and picked them up, to learn something of the contents but could find nothing intelligible, except the first part of the Signature, * Maria.' " Of the truth of her story I have not the slightest doubt, and I think I never can until the Nunnery is opened and examined. " JOUN UlLLIKER. " Sworn before mc, this 14th of March, 1835. "Peter Jenkins, «' Commissioner of Deeds." 256 ATPENDI X Tbo foUo\iing challenge was pabllsbcd in the N. Y. Protestant Vimlicatur fur six or ec'ven wcuks, iu Miirch and April, without a reply. " CiiAixKNUK— The Ilonmn Prclute and Priests of Montreal— Messrs. Conroy, (quarter, and" Scliucllvr, of New York— Metwrf. Fenwick and I{yrae of Bustou — Mr. Hughes of I'hiladelphia — the Arch-Prelate of iJaitiiuore. and his subordinate Priests — and Cardinal England of Charlehton, with all other Uoman Priests, and every Nun from Uuffln's bay to the Gulf of Mexico, are hereby challenged to meet an investi- gation of the truth of Maria Monk's ' Awful Disclosures,' before an impartial assembly, over which shall preside seven gentletnen ; three to be selected by the Uoman Priests, three by the Executive Commit- tee of the New York Protestant Association, and the Seventh as Chairman, to be chosen by the six. " An eligible place in New York shall bo appointed and the regu- lations fur the decorum and order of the meetings, with all the other arrangements, shall be made by the above gentlemen. ^'^S" All communications upon this subject from any of the Roman Priests or Nuns, either individually, or as delegates for their superiors, addressed to the Corresponding Secretary of the JVew York Protestant Association, No. 14^ Nassau-street, ISew York, will be promptly answered." From the N. Y. Protestant Vindicator qf April 6, 1836. *' The CiiALLEXGK. — We have been waiting with no small degree of impatience to hear from some of the Roman priests. But neither they, nor their sisters, the nuns, nor one of their nephews or nieces, have yet ventured to come out. Our longings meet only with disap- pointment. Did ever any person hear of similar conduct on the part of men accused of the liighest crimes, in their deepest dye ? Here is a number of Roman priests, as actors, or accessories, openly denoun- ced before the world as guilty of the most outrageous sins against the sixth and seventh commandments. They are charged before the world with adultery, fornication, and murder ! The allegations are distinctly made, the place is mentioned, the parties are named, and the time is designated ; for it is lasting as the annual revolutions of the seasons. And what is most extraordinary, — the highest official atithorities in Canada know that all those statements are true, and they sanction and connive at the iniquity! — The priests and nuns have been otfered, for several months past, the most easy and certain mode to disprove the felonies imputed to them, and they are still as the dungeons of the Inquisition, silent as the death-like quiet- ude of the convent cell ; and as retired as if they were in the subter- raneous passages between the Nunnery and Lartique's habitation. Now, we contend, that scarcly a similar Instance of disregard for the opinions of mankind, can be found since the Reformation, at least, in a Protestant country. Whatever disregard for the judgment of others, the Romish priests may have felt, where the Inquisition was 1 H RECEPTION OF THE WORK 257 at their commHnd, nnd llio civil power woa their Jacknl nml their Hycnn : tlwy have beeii oljlii^cd lo \n\y home little reyanl to the opinion ol prule.xtiiiitj*. uml to the tlreatl of exposure. We iheii lore repeat the >olemii iiiiluliitaltlc tiiilh — that" Ihf laet.s which are ht.Ui »l hy .Maria N'oiik, res-pectiiig the Hotel iJieu Nuiiiitry at Montreal, are true as Ih-. existence ul' the prii^tH und nuns, — that the eharacier, principles, nnil pructicos of the Jesuits and Nuuh iu Canuda, are ino»t accurately delineated — that popish priestH, und sisters uf charity iu the United States, are their faithful und exact counterparts — thut luuny fennilc schools In the United States, kept by the papist teachers, arc nothing more than placcH of decoy through which young women, ui the most delicate age, are enunared into the power of the Uowaa priests — an \ RECEPTION OF THE WORK 259 I were there 9» and cnter- luT to oppor- ii(i she I was for a iround I mind oposcd should Igc lor to hear women oduccd reeling, heart a 88 with ' dared, woman, |y, very >ed her i)d com- impa- room, in, and almost Maria ivoured ' ought re they institu- :1c, both lU was ird, and imcs he Maria : r before •it. Ug SUd- did not the fact, she had ing, ♦ 0> if I could tell you ! You think you have had trouble, but I have had more thiin ev»!r you did.' " Her di(ru ; and said, she would never again have made her appearance. I inquired whether there was any place wiiere she could have been confined. She replied, in a reserved, but signiiicant man- ner, ' There is ut least one cell there for her.' "New York, March 23d, 1836." ^ " It would be a natural question, if my readers should auk, " What Baid the Roman Catholics to such testimonials? Thoy laid great stress on affidavits sent for to Montreal ; what do they tliink of affi- davits spontaneously given in New York ?"' So far as 1 know, they have republished but one, and that is Mr. Hiller's. 260 APPENDIX. The New York Catholic Diary of March 19th, said— " Wo take the following overwhelming testimony from the Brook- lyn American Citizen of the 11th inslaiit : " The foUo\vin<^ aflidavits, «tc., are copied from the last No. of the 'Protestant V'indiciitor/ and prove, it seems to us, taken with other corroborating circumstances, the falsehood and irrelevancy of the testimony agaiubt Misa Mouk, aud therefore establish the truth of her narrative :" (Here it inserted Mr. Miller's affidavit, and then added :) "What is the weight of the affidavit? Of ponderous import? I inquired where Maria was, and she told mc she was in the Nunnery ? Therefore she is an eloped Nun. Marvellous logical affidavit ! We may say, that when an inquiry is made after the editor of this paper, and the answer is, that h^. was in a Protestant Chiurch, therefore he is a Protestant minister." The Rev. Mr. Schueller, (for a Catholic priest is the editor of that paper,) thus tries to slide over the important testimony of Mr. Mil- ler, aud in doing it, admits that I was in the Hotel Dieu Nunnery in the Kummer of 1832. Of course, he admits then, that Br. Robertson'a testimony to the contrary is false, and gives up the great point which the Montreal affidavits were intended to settle, viz. that I had not beeu in any Nunnery — at least, not since I was a child. But another thing is worthy of remark. The Diary says, " We take the following overwhelming testimony from the Brooklyn Ameri- can Citizen," yet he really leaves out the greater part of the testi- mony which that pap*^!' contained, viz. the certilicate beginning on page 251. Let any one turn to that, and ask whetiier the editor had not some reason to wish to keep it from his readers? Did he not get rid of it very ingeniously, when he inserted the following remarks instead of it ? "Tho following statement has been furnished by the female wit- ness alios e niWtloned ; the name being reserved only from delicacy to tt lady's feelings." '* Exc'dleut ! 'delicacy to a lady's feelings!!' we are absorbed in a!i exclamation of wonder ; the delicate name, in a matter of such vast inipurtance as that which atl'ects the truth of the slanderous talc, cannot be mentioned ! •' Therefore, ' we, the subscribers,' * Brownlee, Slocum, Bruce. Fan- tliaw, Belden, Wesson, and Hogan,' rest the weight of their authcrity upon the * delicacy' of a nameless ' lady's feelings.' ' Now here Mr. Sheilaer preti'iids that the witness was not accessible, and leaves it ia doubt, whether the subscribers, ^mcn oi known char- RECEPTION OP THE WORK. 261 rook- .f the other if the .t Ucr rt? I inery ? ! We paper, ore he of that r. Mil- nery in ertsori'* t which had not '8. "We Am Gri- lle testi- [ning on itor had he not :emiuks lale wit- lelicacy Drbed in lot" such luderoua Ice. Fan- luthcrity nctcr and unimppacliablo voracity.) knew any thing of her. Yet it was cxpri'KSily stutod by them tliat nho was known, and that any rcaa- oniilile iiiquiiics wonhl ho readily answered. (See p. 24f).) I have no intciilinn of atli'tnptins: to enforce tlie evidence present- ed in the testimonials just given, it^hall leave every reader to tbrni his own conclusions independently and dispassionately. 1 could easily say things likely to excite the feelings of every one who peruses tlase pages — but 1 prefer to persist in the course I have thus far pur- sued, and abstain from all exciting expres-sions. The things 1 declai'o are sober realities, and nothing is necessary to have them so received, but that the evidence be calmly laid before the public. I will make one or two suggestions here, for the purpose of direct- ing attention to points of importance, though one or two of them hove been already touched upon. 1st. One of the six allidavits was given by Dr. Ilobertsonj and the remaining live were sworn to before him. 2d. The witnesses speak of interviews with me, on two of the most distressing days of my life. Now let the reader refer to those allidavits and then say, whether any expressions w hich they may have misunderstood, or any which may have been fabricated for 2ne, (as I strongly suspect must have been the fact with some,) ought to destroy my character for credibility ; especially when 1 appeal to evidence so incontestiblc as an inspection of the nunnery, and my opponents shrink IVom it. Let the reader observe also, that in the interviews spoken of in the allidavits, no third person is commonly i^poken of as present ; while those who are named are most of them inimical to me. 3d. All the testimony in the aflldavlts is aimed to destroy my character, and to prevent me from receiving any credit as a witness. Kot a bit of it meets the charges 1 make against the priests and nuns. If they had proved that I never was in the uunne^ that, indeed^ would set aside my testimony : but failing to do jlliftt, the attempt goes far to set their own aside Having now fairly shown my readers what reception my flrst edition met with, both from enemies and friends, I proceed to the " Sequel'' of my narrative. tccssible, m cUttT- T U E END A HOOK Tilt: JESVITS ("AN NOT SUPPItESS ! THE ESCAPED NUN; OR, DISCLOSURES OF CONVENT LIFE. Oifinff ft more 3Iiniit« Denorlptlon and n Bohffr lievflatton of th^ Myntfrtftt and Sft'fetit of NunncrifH, than hav« ever before been submitted to the American public. Eleynnily hound in doth, \^mo. Price, C-. The pnl)lic are aware that we hare lately been involved in a course of lUi^Atlon retpectinr? a Book on Convent Life, and the result Is also known. There It a great diver- Bity of opinion respecting; the Injunction and its attending; circumsiances ; but there is but one opinion as regards the merits of the book we have now the pleasure of presenting, and wlilch contains a fuller and more detailed account of tlie inner life of Convents or Nunneries, than we could have presented In any other form. In order to render this volume as full an exposition as possible of the abuses of which It treats, and to give pub- licity to facts which admit of almost immediate verification, In addition to the principal narrative, the Conkessioss or a "?!ST:iH oi' Ch\mtc. Murder of an American Nun at Sea. Excursions from the Convent dressed as a Sister of Charity, as a Priest, &c. Strange men in the Convent. — Prisons again Convert of the Sacred . Midnight A X« ■emlnate the pure principks of our party throughout the land. Carrying its lessons of patriotism into the honfb of the farmer, the workshop of the mechanic, the store of the merchant, and the ofl|#-i>f tba profeMlonal man, it may truly b« osUed the missionary tr&otof ttegMdOMuer _»____«_-«____«__. W. & Ttaoa, PriHinr sad Stsnetyper, M BMknHa Stn«tb K. T. RKS. «■! yti«ri< * and nericath this popular eavor to sup- ects, and thli of llvlug Wlt- SAL. k, which abouf of Boolety, who ler Btateraent*. •uth, and much ig out of print, iQce thta repuD- IBOOU fflN," Me ,6y Ubiihop. It l9 well printed lAnd It U well to 3atholica having lost unanaw«tft- I copy. . 9re exciting and [AC, 1S56. loopy. I published to dl^ log Us l*8»onB of " the store of the L the missionary