HOME ATTITUDES
^

v/oseph .

pQp youth
Joseph A.Sommer,SJ.

ONE OF FIVE

SOCIAL APOSTOLATE

PROGRAMS

DESIGNED TO CREATE

CORRECT ATTITUDES

FOR YOUTH

ISLJRE

order





HOME ATTITUDES

FOR YOUTH

by

Joseph A. Sommer, S. J.

THE QUEEN’S WORK
3115 South Grand Boulevard

St. Louis 18, Missouri



Imprimi potest:

Daniel H. Conway, S.
J.

Provincial, Missouri Province

Imprimatur:

•h Joseph E. Ritter

Archbishop of St. Louis

May 9, 1955

Any financial profit made by The Queen's Work ivill

he used for the promotion of Sodalities of Our Lady and

the cause of Catholic Action.

Copyright 1955

THE QUEEN’S WORK

OosMed



TABLE OF CONTENTS

FOREWORD 4

HOW TO USE THIS BOOKLET 5

I. GOD'S roEA OF MARRIAGE 10

n. GOD IN THE HOME 14

m. MARY, SAINTS, ANGELS IN THE HOME 17

IV. PARENTS IN THE HOME 19

V. BROTHERS AND SBTERS IN THE HOME 22

VI. HOME AND PARISH 24

Vn. HOME AND SCHOOL 27

Vin. HOME AND RECREATION 30

DC. HOME AS AN ORGANIZATION 33

X. HOME AND NEIGHBORHOOD 37

XI. HOME AND CIVIC SOCIETY 41

CHURCH DOCUMENTS 47



FOREWORD

This is the second in a series of five apostolate booklets

for teen-agers in parishes and high schools. The first con-

cerns the attitude toward school life. The last three will

deal with Church, recreation, and civic life.

This booklet gives practical aids and suggestions to help

teen-agers form in their young friends and acquaintances a

truly Catholic and Christlike attitude toward life in the

HOME.

Today's teen-agers will be tomorrow's parents. Success

in any marriage depends in great part on the pattern of life

the man and the woman have seen and lived up to in their

homes when they were young. Pope Pius XI points this out

clearly in his encyclical on Christian Marriage:

For it cannot be denied that the basis of a happy

wedlock, and the ruin of an unhappy one, is pre-

pared and set in the souls of boys and girls

durii^ the period of childhood and adolescence.

There is danger that those who before marriage

sought in all things what is theirs, who indulged

even their impure desires, will be in the mar-

ried state what they were before, that they will

reap that which they have sown.

4



How to Use This Booklet

For the sake of orderliness and convenience, this book-

let divides home life as follows: God's idea of marriage;

God, Mary, saints, angels, parents, brothers -sisters in

the home; home and parish, school, recreation; the home

as an organization; home and neighborhood; home and so-

ciety.

This booklet contains much more material than can be

covered in a year's apostolate. Hence a group has to de-

cide what items it will work on during the coming year.

Plan and execute each apostolic action according to a

linei^ used successfvdly by Communists and other action

groiQ)s: indoctrinate, observe, plan and carry out action,

report every week.

The following six-week schedule is suggested for each

apostolic action:

First Meeting . Before this meeting have your group

select a division of home life on which it will work during

the coming weeks. Each member then comes prepared for

discussion. Or at this first meeting the director may give

an instructior on the matter.

Toward the end of the meeting, the group looks over the

survey questions given in the booklet. The meeting ends

with a group resolution somewhat like the following: "During

the coming week each of us shall casually find out what two

or three of our teen-age friends think about this matter."

5



MAKING A SURVEY

Second Meeting. First, each member reports whether

or not he asked two or three of his friends about the matter.

The group then reports and discusses its findings. The

meeting ends with a resolution to continue the fact-finding

during the coming week.

Third Meeting . Members first report individually upon

whether or not they carried out the previous week's resolu-

tion. They then discuss their findings further. The meeting

ends with a resolution like the following: "During the coming

week each of us shallfurther study what Christ wants in this

matter and make a comparison between His ideas and how

our young friends act."

Fourth Meeting . Each individual makes a report on

whether or not he has carried out the previous week's reso-

lution. The mind of Christ, especially as expressed through

His Church, is discussed more and a comparison made be-

tween Christ's attitude and the attitude of the young people

in the Catholic environment.

The members of the group end with the resolution to get

an answer to each of the following four questions during the

coming week:

1. What modern man or woman is an outstanding example

of this phase of home life?

2. What modern man or woman is notorious for failure

in this phase of family life?

3. What words of Christ in the Gospel have some bearing

on this phase of home life?

6



4. What action of Christ in the Gospel displays some

virtue needed for this phase of home life?

PLANNING ACTION

Fifth Meeting . Each member first reports his answers

to the four questions. The group then discusses possible

action that can be taken to bring the attitude of their young

friends into closer conformity to that of Christ's. This

apostolate can be carried out by action or by word or by a

combination of both.

The following questions will help you plan ways of car-

rying on a campaign among young friends and acquaintances

to make them more conscious of Christ's attitude about the

particular phase of home life that you are working on and to

influence them to make Christ's attitude their own.
p

A. What shall the prayer elements of your campaign
consist of: daily Mass? daily Communion? daily Rosary?

daily mental prayer? What sacrifices will you make?

B. What group action will you take? Can two or more

members band together and influence other teen-age groups

in the parish or school to discuss and take action on this

particular phase of home life? Can Christas viewpoint on

the matter be brought up again and again casually in con-

versations? What can be done in your classes, school

assemblies, and extracurricular activities to promote

Christ’s attitude in this matter? Can you put articles or

notices in church or school paper, on the bulletin board?

C. What can be done by you as an individual to influence

your young friends and acquaintances in this matter? The

following are some helps on how to proceed on your own.

7



1.

Be friendly with the person. Do him a favor, if pos-

sible. Be interested in what he is interested in. Pay him

a sincere compliment about something good in him. Make

some casual remarks about the subject you wish to discuss.

N.B. Keep in mind that the above are not sham actions

but sincere efforts to help your friend come to know and

love more the greatest Friend that both of you can have,

Jesus Christ. You are not really better than your yoimg

friend, but for some reason Our Lord and Our Lady have

asked you to help your friend come to know them better.

2. Discuss the subject with him alone, and not with others

present. Do so during leisure time, not before an ^am
or some other important event.

a) Be friendly and patient. Do not try to force his free

will. Discuss the subject and let him think it over.

b) Be on eq\ial terms. Mention you have trouble with

the same point. Tell him how some idea in a sermon or in

reading struck you.

c) Ask him for a little favor. That procedure puts you

\mder obligation to him and puts him at ease.

3. Continue your prayer and sacrifices. Be patient.
Give the person a chance to think things over.

D. What are various ways of explaining Christ' s attitude

on this particular phase of home life? How would you ex-

press your ideas in an article for the parish or school paper?

How would you do so in parish meetings, class discussions,

in school assemblies? How could you introduce the matter

in a casual conversation withyour friends and acquaintances ?

8



E. What objections will your young friends bring up?

How will you answer them? What are good ways of pre-
senting these answers? Will your friends try to change the

topic of conversation or shrug the matter off as of little
importance?

Resolution; After your group covers the foregoing ques-

tions, decide on a definite action that you will carry out as

a group or as individuals during the coming week, ^t your
decision in the form of a resolution.

Sixth Meeting . Each member reports on his success or

failure in performing the apostolic action decided on at the

previous meeting. All describe the various ways in which

they have introduced the matter in discussions and conver-

sations, have explained the matter to others, have answered

their objections, have persuaded them to action. All these

contributions made at the meeting will give all of you a better

grasp of the matter and help you acquire valuable apostolic

techniques.

The meeting will end with a repetition of the same reso-

lution on this same phase of family life.

During the coming week the group will decide on what

new phase of family life they will begin at the next meeting.

9



I. God's Idea of Marriage

STEP ONE: Mind of the Chiirch.

At the very beginning of his encyclical on Christian mar-

riage, Pope Pius XI points out that Christ not only made

marriage the beginning and foundation of a family but also

raised Christian marriage to the rank of a true and great

sacrament of the New Law.

St. John Chrysostom called the home a little chiirch.

The sacrament of Matrimony is the only sacrament a priest

cannot administer. Husband and wife confer this sacrament

and its grace on each other. Henceforth both are responsi-

ble for each other. This sacrament binds a family together.

The weakness and failings of one are repaired by the efforts

of the other members of the family. One member imited to
Christ is enough to save a whole family.

The wedding day is the beginning of a new religious life.

Here especially do Christ's words apply, "Where two or

three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the
midst of them."

Thereafter, husband and wife at the Offertory of every

Mass offer their marriage and their family to the heavenly

Father as a holy, well-pleasing offering. At the Consecra-

tion Christ presents Himself as the model of sacrifice in

their married life. In Holy Communion they get strength to

live out their offertory and consecration according to that

model.

10



Love is the dominant theme of the father who takes care

of the souls entrusted to him by God. He takes Christ's

place in the family. By being really a father, by continual-

ly giving himself to his family, by caring for and protectii^

his children, he teaches them to love God as a Father.

St. Paul compared the role of the mother to that of the

Church. The mother is ready to look death in the face in

order to give life. She shelters the treasure of faith in the

family. Along with the natural life, she nourishes in the

child the supernatural life given in Baptism.

The father is the shepherd of the family, and the mother

is the teacher.

Parents are not merely to bring infants into the world.

Their job is not finished until the children become adults

and can provide for themselves in the world. In fact, the

parents' work is not entirely completed until their children

are safe in heaven.

(Many of the foregoing ideas were adaptedfrom the pam-

phlet, "The Family," by Dr. Maria Schlueter-Hermkes,

America Press.)

STEP TWO: Make a Survey.

During the coming week find out the attitude of several

of your young friends toward marriage and the family.

Do they know that the terms of the marriage contract are

drawn up by God Himself?

Do they know that the sacrament of Matrimony is identi-

cal with the marriage contract between two Christians?

11



Do they know that the bridegroom and bride administer

the sacrament of Matrimony to each other?

Do they think of marriage as God's plan for peopling
heaven by having children brought safely into this world and

truly educated?

Do your young friends consider marriage a vocation, a

calling by Christ, to help Him increase the membership of

His Mystical Bocty?

Do your yoong friends know that in their family life now

they are preparing to build their own successful or unsuc-

cessful families in the future?

Do your young friends intend in the future to follow the

Church's ruling on mixed marriages?—"Everywhere and
with the greatest strictness the Church forbids marriages

between baptized persons, one of whom is a Catholic and
the other a member of a schismatical or heretical sect; and

if there is, added to this, the danger of the falling away of

the Catholic party andthe perversion of the children, such a

marriage is forbidden also by the Divine Law" (Canon Law,

Canon 1060).

Do they understand why Pope Pius XI in his encyclical

on Christian Marriage says, "They, therefore, who rashly

and heedlessly contract mixed marriages, from which the

maternal love and providence of the Church persuades her

children for very sound reasons, fail conspicuously in this

respect (that is, to have Catholic marriage approach as near

as possible to the union of Cluist and the Church), some-

times with danger to their eteimal salvation" ?

What item in a recent daily newspaper, movie, or TV

program showed the evil of divorce? Was there any recent

item that glorified divorce,?

12



STEP THREE: Plan Action.

(First read the e}^)lanation of this step on page 7).

What can you and your fellow members do to promote

the Catholic concept of marriage among your teen-age
friends in the parish and school?

What kind of propaganda campaign can you wage to help

Mary develop in your young friends the Christian concept of

marriage?

13



II. God in the Home

STEP ONE: Mind of the Church.

Marriage is the contract between God and a man and a

woman to form a permanent group into which children may
come and grow up according to God's will.

Since the chief obstacle to this. . . is the power

of unbridled lust. . . and since man cannot hold

in check his passions, unless he first subject

himself to God. . . it is above all and before all

necessary that those who are joined in the bond

of sacred wedlock should be wholly imbued with

a profound and genuine sense of duty toward

God, which will shape their whole lives, and fill

their minds and wills with a very deep reverence

for the majesty of God.

—PIUS XI, Christian Marriage

In their November 1950 statement, "Citizen of Two

Worlds," the bishops of the United States said:

The child. . . will find his completion only in life

with God; and that life. . . must begin in the home

through simple and prayerful practices. Morn-

ing and evening prayers, grace before and after

meals, the family rosary, the sayii^ of a short

prayer each time the striking clock marks the

passage of another hour nearer eternity, the
reverential making of the Sign of the Cross, the

14



inculcation of respect for the crucifix and other

religious objects- -all these are practices which

shovild be encouraged in the religious formation

of the child.

The child must know God. There is a vast dif-

ference between 'knowing about God' and 'know-

ing God.' . . . God must become as real to him as

his own father or mother. God must not remain

an abstraction. If He does, He will not be loved;

and if He is not loved, thenaU the child's knowl-

edge about Him will be sterile. Where love is,

there too is service. ' If you love me, keep my
Commandments.' That is Christ's test and it

must be applied to the child. He should be

brought to see God's Commandments and pre-

cepts as guideposts which give an unerring di-

rection to his steps."

The bishops go on to exhort parents to teach their chil-

dren the life of Christ. They are to encourage their sons

and daughters to imitate Christ, especially in His obedience,

patience, thoughtfulness of others, and His spirit of unsel-

fish giving.

STEP TWO: Make a Survey .

During the coming week, check your own home and find

out from two or three of your friends which of the following

religious practices and articles are in their homes: meal

prayers. . . evening prayers together. .
.
picture or statue of

Sacred Heart. . . crucifix. . . holy water. . . sick-call outfit. .

.

family Communion. . . celebration of baptismal days. . . Cath-

olic calendar. . . Catholic books. . . Catholic papers. . . Cath-

olic magazines. . . family spiritual celebration of Christmas

. . . of Easter. . . of Corpus Christi. . . of Pentecost.

15



Which of the above religious practices and articles do

your friends consider important?

Do they think that any of the above religious articles and

practices are out of place in the modern family?

How often do the members of your friends' families talk
about God at the dinner table?

If there is lack of interest about the above spiritual ar-

ticles and practices and conversation in their homes, which

of the following are the reasons that influence your young

friends: human respect? lack of interest in the supernatural?

complete absorption in sports or radio or television and

material things in this world? the constant seeking of rec-

reation away from home? lack of knowledge about the sv5>er-

natural? lack of ability to introduce such topics in the family

conversation? any other reason?

How many of their families prepare for Sunday Mass by

going through the missal together on Saturday night?

Do your young friends understand why the Church plac^

much emphasis on the liturgical cycle and the connection of

the liturgy and Mass with family life?

How many of your young friends have read at least a part

of Pope Plus Xir s encyclical on the liturgy, Mediator Dei?

STEP THREE: Plan Action.

(First read the explanation of this step on page 7.)

What type of propaganda campaign can you sponsor to

help Mary make God and Christ the center of the homes of

your young friends? How can you help make religious prac-

tices and articles practical in their modem homes?

16



III. Mary, Saints, Angels in the Home

STEP ONE: Mind of the Church.

Mary, the Mother of God, is extremely important in the

home. Through her intercession each member of the family

obtains the life of grace, which is a terrific share in God's

own life. The natural mother of a home is the mother of

the human life only. Mary is the mother of the supernatural

life in the home. Hence, your Queen Mother Mary has a

right to be in the center of your home.

St. Joseph, Mary's partner in the family that sheltered

Christ, is also Mary's partner in protecting your family,

which is the tiniest socialunit of the Mystical Body of Christ.

Pope Pius DC placed the entire Catholic Church in the keep-

ing of St. Joseph when on December 8, 1870, he declared

him Patron of the Universal Church. As such, St. Joseph

also has the duty of watching over your family.

Each member of your family has a guardian angel. A
guardian angel has only one job in this world, and that is to

watch over the person put under his care. Angels have
tremendous power. For example, one angel could easily

in a few moments wipe out an entire Communist army. This

power he puts at the service of the human person he is
watching over. You and your family then should daily call

on the service of the powerful angels commissioned by God

to be at your service.

17



In heaven you will enjoy the companionship of many
friends. Among these you already have some special friends.
Why not let statues and pictures of these angels and saints
about the home remind you frequently of them?

STEP TWO; Make a Survey.

During the coming week, check your own home and find

out from two or three of your friend about their homes to

see in which of the following ways Mary and the saints and

angels of heaven are remembered and honored: family Ro-

sary. . . consecration to Immaculate Heart. .
.
picture of

Blessed Virgin Mary. . . of St. Joseph. . . of Guardian Angel

...or statue of Mary. ..of St. Joseph. .. home shrine of

Blessed Virgin Mary. .. celebration of feast days of mem-
bers of family. . . celebration of baptismal days. .

.

Which of the above religious practices and articles do

your friends consider important?

Do they think that any of the above religious practices

and articles are out of place in the modern family? If so,

why?

STEP THREE: Plan Action.

(First read the explanation of this step on page 7.)

^^^lat can you do to see that Mary and the saints and an-

gels have their rightful place in the home of your young

friends ?

What kind of propaganda campaign can you conduct?

18



IV. Parents in the Home

STEP ONE: Mind of the Church.

A home without parental authority is like a chicken with
its head cut off. The parents are the head of the family

organization and have the authority and responsibility to

lead. The children are rank-and-file members of the family

and have the responsibility to follow.

On October 26, 1941, Pope Pius xn clearly described
parental leadership:

The mind of the child as it comes forth from its

mother' s womb is a page upon which nothing is
written. From hour to hour as it passes on its

way from the cradle to the tomb its eyes and

other senses. .. will write upon that page the

images and ideas of the things among which it

lives. . .

.

Train the minds of your children. Do not give

them wrong ideas or wrong reasons for things.

Whatever their questions may be, do not answer

them with evasions or untrue statements which

their minds rarely accept. . .

.

Train the character of your children. Correct

their faults, encourago and cultivate their good

qualities and coordinate them with that stability

which will make for resolution in after-life.
Your children. . . will learn in time to see. . . the

19



interpreter of another and higher will, the will

of God. . .

.

Train their hearts. .. .What deep and rich po-

tentialities for love, goodness, and devotion lie

dormant in the heart of a child! You. . . must

awaken them, foster them, direct them, raise

them up. . . to Jesus, and to Mary, their heaven-

ly Mother. . .

.

In their 1950 statement "The Child: Citizen of Two
Worlds," the bishops of the United States stress the obliga-

tion of parents to supervise the recreation of their children.

Many luisanitary influences are at work in mod-

em society which must not be allowed free play
upon the personality of a growing child. Parents

should carefully regulate the company and the

hours which their child keeps. They should not

treat him as an adult. He needs to be warned

against, even forbidden, certain associations.

Particidarly during adolescence, this is ex-

tremely important. A vigilant watch is to be
kept over the type of entertainment in which he

indulges, the motion pictures he attends, the

books he reads, the radio and television pro-

grams to which he is exposed in the home.

God gives parents a share in His authority. Therefore,

whatever commands they give within the range of their au-

thority are the command of God.

STEP TWO: Make a Survey .

Do your young friends have Christ' s attitude toward the

authority of parents?

20



Do they obey because by so doing they obey God?

Do your young friends argue with their parents about the

followii^: their allowance. .. their working part-time...
family car. . . not bringing their friends home. . . making

noise and disrupting home when friends come. . . clothes. .

.

smoking. . . homework. . . extracurriculars. . . school grades

. . . work about the home. . . spending recreation time with
family. . .using telephone. . . radio or television programs?

If there are arguments, what is the reason for them?

Do your young friends have confidence in their parents?

Do they consult their parents and respect their opinions
about (1) DATES, that is, frequency, companions, places,

curfew, etc.; (2) SCHOOL, that is, informing parents about

homework, school activities, getting along with teachers,

extracurriculars, etc.; (3) READING, that is, novels, mag-

azines, comic books, other readii^ material?

If your young friends lack confidence in their parents,

what are the reasons ?

STEP THREE: Plan Action.

(First read the explanation of this step on page 7.)

How can you influence your teen-age companions to ac-
quire greater respect for parental authority?

How can you help them develop more confidence in their
parents? How can you encourage them to have frank dis-

cussions with their parents when special problems arise?

What will be the nature of your propaganda campaign to

promote the above ideas ?

21



V. Brothers and Sisters in the Home

STEP ONE: Mind of the Church.

Christ's words, "Amen I say to you, as long as you did

it for one of these, the least of my brethren, you did it for
me" (Matt. 25:40), certainly applies to the way your yoimg

friends treat their brothers and sisters.

To help strangers and speak kindly to them is not diffi-

cult. But to overlook slighting wor<fe and actions on the

part of those with whom you live day after day requires the
courage and strength and nobility of the Heart of Christ.

Charity really begins at home. The approval and condem-

nation that Christ gives in the Last Judgment scene will ap-

ply strongly to the way that members of a family act toward

each other.

Brothers and sisters, especially as adults, allow matters

of difference about money and other material trifles to tear

apart the close relationship into which God has put them.

To these Christ says (Matt. 5:23-24):

Therefore, if thou art offering thy gift at the al-

tar and there reniemberest that thy brother has

anything against thee, leave thy gift before the

altar and go first to be reconciled to thy brother,

and then come and offer thy gift.

God has put parents and brothers and sisters in the same

family unit becauseHe wants them to be of continual help to

each other. Their first responsibility is to each other.

22



STEP TWO: Make a Survey .

During the coming week check the attitude of several of

your young friends toward their brothers and sisters.

Do your young friends look upon their families as cells

in the Mystical Body of Christ?

Are they convincedthat whatever they do to their brothers

and sisters they do to Christ Himself?

Do they show genuine interest and help their brothers

and sisters with the following: their hobbies. . . their com-

panions. . . their schoolwork. . . their extracurriculars. . .

their future vocations. . . their dealings with their parents. .

.

their dates?

Do they argue with their brothers and sisters about using

the telephone. .. using the car. ..their taste in music...

clothes. . . TV or radio programs. . . sports? K so, why?

Have they hurt Christ in their brothers*and sisters by

being stubborn and loud in expressing their opinions? by

taking offense qui^'kly over petty things? byrefusing to speak

to them for a long time? by slashing their brothers and

sisters with clever, biting words? by threatening to report

them to dad or mother? by prying into the personal affairs

of their brothers and sisters? by reading letters not ad-

dressed to them?

STEP THREE: Plan Action.

(First read the explanation of this step on page 7.)

How can you help youryoungfriends treat their brothers
and sisters as they would Christ Himself?

What kind of propaganda campaign will you conduct?
Remember that this campaign is composed of prayer and

sacrifice and actions as well as words.

23



VI. Home and Parish

STEP ONE: Mind of the Church.

In a talk to women of Italian Catholic Action, October

26, 1941, Pope Pius Xn described the relation of home to
parish in the following words:

. . . bi this great work of the Christian education

of your sons and daughters you will understand

the training in the home, however wise, however

thorough, is not enough. It needs to be supple-

mented and perfected by the powerful aid of
religion. From the moment of Baptism the
priest possesses the authority of a spiritual fa-

ther and a pastor over your children. You must

cooperate with him in teaching them those first

rudiments of catechism and piety which are the

only bases of a solid educationand of which you,

the earliest teachers of your children, ought to

have a sufficient and sure knowledge. You can-

not teach whatyou do notknowyourselves. Teach

them to love God, to love Christ, to love our

Mother, the Church, and the pastors of the
Church who are your guides. Love the catechism

and teach your children to love it; it is the great

handbook of the love and fear of God, of Chris-

tian wisdom and of eternal life.

Pius XI, in his encyclical on the Christian Education of

Youth, states that God intends the harmony between the
Church and the Christian family to be so great "that the

24



Church and the family may be said to constitute together

one and the same temple of Christian education."

STEP TWO: Make a Survey .

During the coming week check the home life of several

of your young friends with regard to the following points.

How many know whether or not their families are regis-

tered at the parish rectory?

How many have never spoken to their pastors ? If not,

why not?

How many know whether or not their homes have been
blessed by the priest?

Do your young friends know what organizations and ac-

tivities in their parishes help their families ? If not, why

not?

How many of them take part in these organizations and

activities?

Do they know that important activities regarding family

life are going on in the diocese?

Do they know what charitable activities the diocese is

sponsoring?

How many read the diocesan paper regularly?

STEP THREE: Plan Action .

(First read the e;q)lanation of this step on page 7.)

25



How can you helpyour friends see more clearly the need
of cooperation between home and parish?

How can you help them want to participate in parish ac-

tivities with their families ?

What kind of propaganda campaign will you wage to help

Mary promote such cooperation?

26



Vil. Home and School

STEP ONE: Mind of the Church.

In his encyclical on the Christian Education of Youth,

Pope Pius XI stated:

Since however the younger generations must be

trained in the arts and sciences for the advan-

tage and prosperity of civil society, and since

the family of itself is unequal to this task, it was

necessary to create that social institution, the

school. . . . The school is by its very nature and

institution subsidiary and complementary to the

family and to the Church. It follows logically

and necessarily that it must not be in opposition

to, but in positive accord with, those other two

elements, and form with them a perfect moral

union, constituting one sanctuary of education,

as it were, with the family and the Church.

The bishops of the United States in their 1950 statement

stress the need of cooperation between the family and the

school.

A close association between home and school
should be maintained by parents and school au-

thorities so as to facilitate an exchange of views

and confidences regarding the child. In this

way, home and school-life can be better inte-

grated and there will be a reduction of those

27



conflicts which often are at work in his life, and

which do not receive the understanding and at-

tention they deserve.

The schools help the family. Authority in the school is

an extension of that of the parents. Your parents therefore

have the right to your confidence. They also have the ob-

ligation to cooperate with school authorities, and the right

to receive cooperation from the same authorities.

STEP TWO: Make a Survey.

During the coming week find out from several of yoxm

young friends whether they know they have an obligation of

discussing school affairs with their parents?

Do they confide in their parents about school discipline,

homework, extracurriculars, class affairs, other school

activities ?

Do they encom*age their parents to take part in parents-

teachers association?

What activities for parents does your school sponsor?

Do all students try to interest their parents in these ac-

tivities? If not, why not?

Do they show an interest in the studies of their younger

brothers and sisters?

Do they help them see the justice of disciplinary meas-

ures at school?

28



STEP THREE: Plan Action.

(First read the explanation of this step on page 7.)

How can you get your young friends to want to confide in

their parents about school affairs?

Can parents be invited to school activities ?

How can your young friends help their younger brothers

and sisters ^th their school work?

What type of propaganda campaign will your Sodality
group wage to make Christ's ideas dominate?

29



VIII. Home and Recreation

STEP ONE: Mind of the Church.

Friends are frequently made more quickly during the

time of recreation than in any other way. Hence, recrea-

tion in the home is needed tokeep up companionship between

parents and brothers and sisters. The family that plays

and prays together, is the family that stays together.

Good recreation and work together in the home is un-

doubtedly also the most effective way of learning how to use

your leisure wisely when you become adults.

Recreating together develops a sense of wanting to be

together. And wanting to be together is a must for your

little cell in the Mystical Body of Christ.

Regarding television, for example. Pope Pius Xn in a
letter to the bishops of Italy (January 1, 1954) points out

that television can destroy the air of purity and reserve

which should pervade the home. Clergy and laity must act

to make television not only morally irreproachable but also

an instrument of Christian education.

However, despite the dangers of television, our Holy

Father praises it for bringing recreation back into the fam-

ily circle.

In recent times the cinema, sports, not to men-

tion the dire necessities of daily work, have in-

creasingly tended tokeep members of the family

30



away from home, and thiis the natural blossom-

ing of domestic life has been upset. We must
be glad, then, that television contributes effica-

ciously to reestablish the balance, by providing

the whole family with an opportunity for honest

diversion together, away from the dangers of

bad company and places.

The praise that His Holiness gives wholesome television

applies also to any form of reasonable work and recreation

in the home that unites father, mother, brothers, and sisters

in the family circle.

STEP TWO: Make a Survey.

During the coming week check with several of your young

friends to learn which of thefollowing recreational activities

take place in their homes.

Does the family watch television together?

Do they play such games as scrabble, cards. Twenty

Questions?

Do they have family discussions about current topics ?

Do they have family projects, such as Christmas tree

trimmings or improvements about the house, helping to

paint the storm windows, putting them up?

Are they xisually at home for the entire family meal?

Do they have family picnics in their backyard or in the

park?

31



Do they have a family night, that is a night once a week

or once a month set aside when the family is together all

evening?

Do they have parties for their young friends at their

homes ?

In giving such parties, do they show consideration in

preparing and cleaning up?

As guests, do they show consideration for the parents

and talk to them and treat them with respect and leave the

place in order and always remember a "thank you"?

STEP THREE: Plan Action.

(First read the explanation of this step on page 7.)

What can you do to develop inyouryoung friends a desire

for recreation in the home?

What will make up your propaganda campaign to help
Mary pull families together by means of family work and

recreation?

32



IX. Home as an Organization

STEP ONE: Mind of the Church .

A family is not a haphazard grouping of pec^le. God
designs the family as a living unity. For example, your

parents did not select you. God Himself chose your parents

and your brothers and sisters and you. He forms the mem-
bers of your family into an organism, in which all of you are

so coimected that whatever one does affects all the others.

Every family is an organization with (a) a common aim

and purpose, (b) common leadership, (c) a common program.

a) God planned the family as an organism in which chil-

dren come into the world and are to grow up to adulthood in

natural life and in the life of sanctifying grace.

b) God appointed parents to lead this organization.

c) The common program for families is explained in de-

tail in the various sections of this booklet. This part will

stress the important element of cooperation and work in
family life.

In their 1950 statement, the bishops of the United States

stress the fact that work in the family is a means of grow-

ing in the life of grace.

It is the duty of parents to see to it that their

child develops the deepest sense of responsibil-

ity; leamii^ at the earliest possible peiiod that

33



he is accountable to God for his thoughts, his

words and his actions. He should be held in

strict account for the performance of chores and

tasks which are given to him by his parents. He

must be made to see that each member of the
family has a part to play in the service of God

by carrying out an assigned role.

A non-Catholic authority on family life, Paul Popenoe,
in an address at Santa Clara University, incHcated how work

at home is needed to develop natural abilities.

Young people need to be provided with more
skills for marriage and family life. In earlier

generations they learned these skills by growing

up in a farm family. . . . Removal of the family

from the farm to the city has deprived it very

largely of its educational function in this respect

as in others.... It is not easy in a city home

or in an apartment house to find chores which

will make the children feel that they are a part

of the family enterprise and which will train

them to establish and maintain their own family

successfully when the time comes. . .

.

Not only should children be given as many jobs

as possible, even though they may do them less

efficiently than the parents themselves could,

but they should take a large part in the economic

activities of the family. Appropriate allowances

from the time that they can count should lead to

buying for the family, keeping the family ac-

counts, and planning family expenditures through

a family council or otherwise. Children should

be encouraged to study tax bills and rental con-

tracts, to read insurance policies (including the

fine print) and reconcile bank statements. . .

.

34



Girls and boys alike need better training in do-

mestic skills in the school as well as in the

home. . . . Boys get almost no practice in deal-

ing with the simple mechanical adjustments and

problems of upkeep which are a part of the nor-

mal home life.

Cooperation and work at home are a must for the close

union that makes the family what it is, the smallest social

organism in that larger organism, the Mystical Body of

Christ.

STEP TWO: Make a Survey .

During the coming week check with several of your young

friends to see in what ways they cooperate in work and rec-

reation about the home?

In which ways do they not cooperate?

Do they argue with their parents about giving up recrea-

tion outside of the home in order to help about the house?

Do they want to take orders from their parents ?

Do they want to confide in their parents about their per-

sonal affairs?

Do they prefer to recreate at home rather than outside

of the home?

How much time do they spend generally at home?

How much time do they generally spend in recreation

outside of the home?

Which is more? Why?

35



STEP THREE: Plan Action.

(First read the explanation of this step on page 7.)

What can you do to help your friends want to spend more

time with their families, cooperate about the home?

What kind of propaganda campaign will you sponsor to

help Mary make their families excellent organizations?

36



X. Home and Neighborhood

STEP ONE: Mind of the Church.

A neighborhood is made up of many homes. Unless you
and your family take up residence on a desert isle (some-

thing that God evidently does not want), your home must

necessarily be surrounded by many other homes. God wants

families to depend on each other.

Take a look at your neighborhood. You may think that

the families just happen to live near each other and have no

responsibility toward each other. Such is not the case.
At the present time, God wills that you have your present

neighbors. He wants your family to participate in the life

of the neighborhood and to contribute to its social and spir-

itual development.

Pope Pius XI, in his encyclical on Reconstructing the

Social Order, stresses the above facts.

Then only will true cooperation be possible for

a single common good when the constituent parts

of society deeply feel themselves members of

one great family and children of the same Heav-

enly Father; nay, that they are one body in

Christ but severally members one of another

(Rom. 12:5) so that H one member suffers any-
thing, all the members suffer with it (I Cor.

12:26).

37



Above all, friendship and service are to be outstanding

in the dealings of your family vdtk others in your neighbor-

hood. Christian charity is to be the neighborhood theme

song.

In a radio address to the United States in 1947, Pope

Pius Xn e}q)lained what this Christian charity is.

Charity is different from any other human love

because it is the replica of Christ's love for

man. 'A new commandment I give you, that you

love one another; that as I have loved you, you

also love one another.* That is charity. . .

.

And what did Christ love in man, except God?

Not in the sense that He found God already in

every man, but in the sense that He hoped
through love to restore God to every man. . .

.

Charity means thatyou love each other thus with

a view to bringing God more and more into the

lives of each other so that, linked together as so

many members by the spirit of Divine Love, you

may cooperate in forming a body not unworthy

of the Divine Head.

Families in a neighborhood have the God-given obliga-

tion to coc^erate together in Christian charity so that, linked

together by the spirit of Divine Love, they will make their

section of theMysticalBody worthy of its head, Jesus Christ.

STEP TWO: Make a Survey.

During the coming week check with a few of your young

friends to see how interested they are iri their neighbor-

hoods.

38



Do your young friends think that their families may ig-

nore some of the families in their neighborhoods? K so,

why?

Do they know all of their immediate neighbors ? If not,

why not?

Do they make an effort to welcome new families into
their neighborhood?

Do they quarrel with any of the families in their neigh-

borhood? If so, why?

Are there any families in their neighborhoods that do not

speak to each other?

If possible, do they take care of the children in the neigh-

borhood by reading to them, by helping with simple hobbies,

by taking them to the neighborhood playground, in other

ways?

Do they know how many of their neighbors are Catholic

and non-Catholic?

Do they know how many of the homes in their neighbor-

hood have been consecrated to the Sacred Heart and Im-

maculate Heart?

How many neighborhoods have the block Rosary?

How many Catholic magazines and pamphlets are in the

various homes in the neighborhood?

Is there any discrimination against minority groups in

the neighborhoods? If so, why?

39



STEP THREE: Plan Action.

(First read the explanation of this step on page 7.)

What can you do to help your young friends take a deeper

interest in the families in their neighborhoods?

How can you help them make their neighborhood a truly

representative section of the Mystical Body of Christ?

What kind of propaganda campaign will you conduct to

help Mary make neighborhoods truly Christlike?

40



XI. Home and Civic Society

STEP ONE: Mind of the Church.

Whether you like it or not, God created you in such a

way that you cannot live here or reach the ne:rt life without

the help of your fellow men.

God further ordained that in this life you and your fellow

men must live in groups. The basic social unit is the fam-

ily. This depends much on two others: a supernatural-life

organism (the Church) and a natural-life organization (civic

society).

The family has its own native rights which no civil power

can take away or unduly limit.

The state and civic society has the obligation to provide

whatds necessary for good family life. The bishops of the

United States in their 1949 statement, "The Christian Fam-

ily," describe these necessities with striking clearness.

To exist in full effectiveness, family life must

have permanence . This permanence depends
chiefly upon the permanence of. . . the marriage

of one man with one woman in divorceless union

that is broken only by the death of one of the

spouses. . .

.

Any marriage which looks to dissolution or di-

vorce, even as a possibility, cannot give to
children the security they need; cannot surround

41



children with the enduring atmosphere of home;

cannot breathe into children the true spirit of

family life.

Further, family life must have freedom . . . . The

State must not therefore fail to provide oppor-

tunities for the adequate housing of families, for

the requisite schooling of children, for the vise

of common benefits supplied through the taxing
of citizens.

The family needs a just measure of economic

security. When, in a wealthy and prospering

nation, diligent and willing parents are forced

to live in grinding poverty; when parents have

no opportunity of owning their own home; when

the aid of government is extended to those who

raise crops or build machines but not to those

who rear children, there exists a condition of

inequity and even of injustice.

Social legislation and social action must concur

to improve man's economic opportunity, to en-

able him to marry early, to free him from the

peril of unnaturally limiting his family, and to

afford him some certainty of sufficiently gainful

employment and some assurance that death or

accident will not reduce his dependents to the

status of public charges.

Finally, the family needs religion. . . . The home

must again become a shrine of fidelity, a place

where God is the unseen host.

The family in its turn must help civic society.

The first obligation of the family to society is to make

42

I



itself the family it should be. Our bishops in their 1949

statement stressed the fact that "No nation can be greater

than its families."

The family is also to take an active part, as far as it

reasonably can, in civic life.

In his Christmas Message of 1948, Pope Pius Xn em-
phasized that Catholics are to contribute their share to the

good nmning of civic society:

A convinced Christian cannot confine himself
within an easy and egotistical isolationism when

he witnesses the needs and miseries of his
brothers

;
when pleas for help come to him from

those in economic distress; when he knows the

aspirations of the working classes for more
normal and j\ist conditions of life; when he is

aware of the abuses of the economic system
which puts money above social obligations

;
when

he is not ignorant of the mistakes of a stubborn

nationalism which denies or spurns the common

bonds linking the separate nations together, and

imposing on each one of them many and varied

duties toward the great family of nations.

Families have the same obligation as individuals of par-

ticipating in the economic and political life of civic society.

STEP TWO: Make a Survey .

N.B. This section really contains two elements that

should not be taken at the same time. The first one deals

with the obligations of the state and civic society toward the

family. The second treats of the duties of the family to so-

ciety. Spend several weeks for survey and action on each

of these.

43



A. IXities of State and Society to Family Life.

In their 1949 statement, the bishops of the United States

state that "the world by countless acts and agencies moves

steadily to disrupt family life and destroy the home."

They then list a number of these acts and agencies, which

are given below. During the coming week bring each of

these up in conversation with several of your young friends

to learn how much they agree or disagree with these evils.

Moreover, find one example of each in a daily newspaper,

TV program, or movie.

1. The world approves and facilitates divorce

as a cure for domestic ills.

2. It accepts mviltiple marriages which usually

mean a hopeless entanglement of the infelic-

ities of a plurality of broken homes.

3. It sponsors planned parenthood by use of
unnatural and morally degrading means, thus

infusing poison into the heart of family life

by destroying in husband and wife the self-

respect and mutual reverence on which alone

is built enduring love and patient fidelity.

4. It is xmconcemed, for the most part, about

its manifest duty of removing the great dif-

ficulties that lie in the way of those who wish

to marry and establish homes.

5. Its social legislation in point of suitable

housing, decent material facilities, security

in income and prospects, is slow, fumbling,

and inadequate.

44



B. Duties of Family to Civic Society .

During the coining week check with several of your young

friends to see whether or not their families have contributed

their share to the good of civic society.

Before the last national election, in how many families

did the adults intelligently discuss the merits of &e various
candidates?

Before the last state elections, how many of the adult

members prepared intelligently for voting?

How many of your young friends know their national Sen-
ators and Congressional Representatives?

How many know their State senator and representative?
H they do not know them, why not?

How many of their families have contact with labor unions

(as members or otherwise)?

Are theirviews of unions favorable or unfavorable? Why?

In their families is there any discrimination against mi-

nority groups such as Negroes, Jews, others?
i

The Christian reconstruction of society demands a rec-

ognition of the dignity of work. This dignity must be learned

in the home. How many of your yoimg friends work about

the home willingly? How many of them consider such work

as a means of becoming more like Christ?

Do your young friends and their families know local or-

dinances such as local speed laws, parking rules, buildii^

codes?

45



Do they want to observe these civic regulations?

If they make light of these, why do they do so?

STEP THREE: Plan Action.

(See the note at the beginning of STEP TWO on page 43.)

A. (First read the explanation of this step on page 7.)

What can you do to make your young friends aware of

the duties of the state and civic society to help family life?

What kind of propaganda campaign will you conduct?

B. (First read the explanation of this step on page 7.)

What can you do to help your young friends make their

families more conscious of their serious obligation to par-

ticipate in civic life?

In what shall your propaganda campaign consist?

46



Church Documents

Pope Pius XI:

Encyclical, Divini niius Magistri, Christian Education of

Youth (1929).

Encyclical, Cast! Connubii
,
Christian Marriage (1930).

Encyclical, Quadragesimo Anno, Reconstruction of the So-

cial Order (1931).

Pope Pius XII;

Allocution to Women of Catholic Action (October 26, 1941);
printed under title, "Guiding Christ’s Little Ones,"
Family Life Bureau, N.C.W.C., 1942; also in Clergy

Review
, 22 (March 1942), 132-38.

Radio Address to National Conference of Catholic Charities

on "Christian Charity’ (October 1947); Catholic Mind,

December 1947, pp. 705-707.

Letter to Bishops of Italy on "Television: Its Public and
Private Effects" (January 1, 1954); The Pope Speaks,

First Quarter 1954, pp. 5-10.

Bishops of the United States :

1949 Statement of the Bishops of the United States, "The

Christian Family"; N.C.W.C., Washington, D.C.

47



1950 Statement of the Bishops of the United States, "The

Child: Citizen of Two Worlds"; N.C.W.C., Washington,
D.C.

N.B. Simplified editions of the above three encyclicals of

Pope Pius XI can be obtained from the Paulist Press. The

encyclical on the Mystical Body of Christ, by Pope Pius

Xn, and several other encyclicals are also available in sim-

plified form.

48
LITHO IN U.S. A.



I'

L

i

1

r

>

r

\

i