!
H teller

(

TV\eves<^

^ *v\ » l M ( / Ag. . . ~
c a An u. <b_620

FAMILY LIFE





$15WL

POPULAR LITURGICAL LIBRARY

Series IV NO. 6

FAMILY LIFE IN CHRIST

by

Therese Mueller

THE LITURGICAL PRESS
COLLEGEVILLE, MINNESOTA



NIHIL OBSTAT

Basilius Stegmann, O.S.B.

Censor Librorum

IMPRIMATUR

Hh Jos. F. Busch

Episcopus S , Clodoaldi

Die 19 maii 1941

Copyright, 1941

THE ORDER OF ST. BENEDICT, INC.

COLLEGEVILLE, MINN.



FAMILY LIFE IN CHRIST

It has been my good fortune to have experienced

and actively shared in the attempts to revive the liturgy

in both parochial and family life in Germany. I was

in close touch with numerous groups of young Catholic

fathers and mothers who worked hard to found their

families on a thoroughly liturgical basis. In the follow-

ing pages I shall attempt to describe these efforts and to

discuss the possibilities of bringing home our religion,

that is, of living the liturgy in the family circle.

* * * *

“It depends upon the family whether the Church

is to be saved in a country or destroyed. 1 he Church

as a whole has, it is true, the promise that she will

never succumb till the end of time. But this promise

is not made to every province of the Church. Whether

in a given land the Church is to abide depends not on

external things, not even on whether church buildings

and convents are destroyed, nor even in the last resort

on the ecclesiastical hierarchy, but upon this, that the

men and women who have administered to one another

the sacrament of matrimony, from the grace of this

sacrament transform their families into little churches.

That—no more, no less—is in this hour the one thing
needful.”

1

’Schlueter-Hermkes, The Family, p. 18.

3



Thus we understand the urgent call of our time

for holy fathers and mothers, for holy families, who

will build anew the Christian foundations of a social

life that has evidently lost its Christian features. Thus

we understand St. Paul's strong emphasis on the
'

'great sacrament" of matrimony, which makes of two

natural persons one new supernatural unity incorpo-

rated in the mystical body of Christ.

Baptismal Consciousness

Our Lord instituted two sacraments in order that

the Church might grow both in the natural and in the

supernatural sphere: matrimony and holy orders. Matri-

mony and natural procreation are the presupposition of

rebirth in baptism. Moreover, in the sacramental union,

the Christian father and mother are representatives of

God in rearing and training new members of Christ in

the spirit of their baptism, and therefore we must admit

that for a Christian the day of baptism is far more

important than his birthday. Why should we not cre-
ate a new tradition in a young family—following the
example of many saints—of celebrating the baptismal
days, especially those of our children, instead of or in

addition to the birthdays? This will enable us to remind

them year after year in a solemn family gathering of

what happened on the day of their rebirth as children

of God. The godparents or others who attended the

baptism of the child should be present. If the godpar-

ents cannot attend, they should at least send a letter.

How important were such letters from godparents in

the lives of our grandparents and great-grandparents !
2

2
Cf. Orate Fratres, Vol. XII (1938), pp. 289-293: "Letters

of a Godmother," by Therese Mueller.

4



From this it also follows that it is essential to choose

as godparents for our children persons in whom we

have absolute confidence that they understand and will-

ingly undertake the full responsibility involved in this

spiritual fatherhood and motherhood.

When the children are small, we may tell them of

their baptism day in story form. In the case of older

children, we should read and explain the actions, sym-

bols and ceremonies of the official baptismal rite. Then

together we renew the baptismal vows. The solemn oc-

casion can be brought to a fitting close with the Te

Dcutn or some other appropriate song of thanksgiving.

As the Church in her liturgical ceremonies makes

the reality she is enacting more impressive and under-

standable by using visible and palpable things—water,
candle, salt, oil, baptismal robe—so we also ought to
give the child things that will help remind and impress

him. Suitable gifts might, for instance, take the form

of a Bible, a small holy water stoup for his room, a

book about or by his patron saint. Again, when he is

old enough to appreciate such things, he may on the

anniversary day be given one of the small garments he

wore at baptism, or the letters written for that day.

According to the rite, appropriate gifts for baptism are

the candle, which the priest hands to the child to repre-

sent the light of Christ who comes to live in the bap-

tized, and the white baptismal robe spread over him as a

symbol of the innocence and sanctifying grace with

which baptism clothes the soul. These should be accom-

panied by a card containing the prayers recited by the

priest in conferring these gifts:
4

'Receive this white gar-

ment, which mayest thou wear without stain before the

judgment seat of our Lord Jesus Christ, that thou may-

5



est have life everlasting. Amen, Receive this burning

light, and safeguard thy baptism by a blameless life;

keep the commandments of God, that when our Lord

shall come to claim His own, thou mayest be worthy

to greet Him with all the saints in the heavenly court,

and live forever and ever. Amen/'

What a splendid tradition, full of profound and

ever new meaning, could be started if parents and god-

parents were to offer such gifts instead of the customary

silver spoons, saving account book, or baby clothes!

All these things should be reverently saved and

should be shown to the child on each baptismal anni-

versary, on the day of first holy Communion, and on

the occasion of the solemn renewal of baptismal vows

in the parish. The candle should, of course, be actually

used again on these days. Later, when as grown-up

sons and daughters the children leave the house to take

their place in society or establish their own family, these

gifts should be given to them permanently.

The yearly commemoration of the mystery of

baptism within the family circle will never fail to

impress all participants. The anniversary could also be

made an effective reminder by attending a baptism or by

visiting the church where the child was reborn in Christ,

On one such trip to the baptismal chapel of our chil-

dren, it happened that we unexpectedly witnessed the

baptism of nine infants. Not only were our own chil-

3
In earlier times, however, the silver spoon (or silver mug)

had a beautiful Christian significance. Used in the administration

of baptism and a gift of the godparent, it was meant to be a

lasting remembrance of baptism, and had the figure of the patron

saint (or of some apostle, hence “apostle spoon”)—Mickey and
Minnie Mouse had not yet entered the scene!—engraved on the
handle.

6



dren, though very small, deeply impressed and incited

to numerous questions for many days to come, but even

we adults felt we had received a special grace from God

by this rare experience.

In large sections of the old country, where Catho-

lic tradition reaches back to medieval times, the name-

day, the feast of the patron saint to whose care the

child was committed at baptism, is celebrated as the

anniversary of the baptismal day. Thus, besides serving

as a reminder of his baptismal privileges and duties, the

celebration impresses on the child the life and work,

the struggle and the holiness of the saint whose name

he bears, and teaches him to consider how he may fol-

low the example of his patron in his own state and

calling. Moreover, also in this country we find people

who, faithful to a beautiful tradition brought from east-

ern Europe, celebrate the feast of the patron saint by

means of a voluntary vigil with strict fast, confession

and holy Communion, followed by a family feast.

Would it not be worth-while to go back a few genera-

tions to renew and rediscover religious traditions, which

still have—perhaps now more than ever—something
vital and beautiful to say to our own times?

Bringing Home the Sacraments

We have already discussed the role of baptism in
the Christian family life. Let us now briefly consider

the remaining sacraments. Of these holy Eucharist is

first.

Even a small child should feel at home at the

eucharistic Sacrifice and should be encouraged to imitate

father and mother in going there daily or weekly. Assist-

ing at Mass for the first time—on a holyday or family
7



feast—should be an impressive event for the little one.
The privilege aspect of Mass attendance should be

stressed, so that going to church becomes a sublime and

memorable experience, something ardently to be desired,

as if it were a gift or reward. We should always do

whatever we can to maintain this attitude towards the

holy Sacrifice.

Then Sunday after Sunday we prepare the child for

holy Mass, reminding him of the mystery of the re-

newal of the death on the cross, the redemption of

mankind. We shall always try to find new ways of

explaining the parts of the Mass in words adapted to

his understanding. We must instil in him a longing to

share in the sacrifice, to offer himself, body and soul, in

joy and sorrow, life and death, with Christ. We must

teach him to become consciously a part of Christ and

of His Sacrifice, to be transformed with the bread and

wine into Him who is going to offer us with Himself

to the Father, and who gives us His flesh and blood,

His love and grace in holy Communion.

Soon we can begin to explain the Sunday gospel;

for the younger children this can take the form of a

“holy story.” Later we may add thoughts and instruc-

tions from the epistles. In this manner we grow with

our children in liturgical understanding until we begin

a new tradition, a family practice: on Saturday eve-

nings, when everything is in readiness for the Sunday,

when the Church has already begun the Lord's Day

with the celebration of First Vespers, we shall spend

an hour of quiet and recollection together, disposing

our hearts and our minds for Sunday. We may read the

text of the next day's Mass, thinking it over and dis-

cussing it. If we have at hand an article or a book treat-

8



ing of the Sunday's liturgy, we may read from it and

explain the Church's mind, giving also the little ones

an opportunity to ask questions or to say things in their

own way. Thus we shall awaken an interest in the life

of the Church not only in the children, but the family

as a whole will learn to breathe in rhythm with the

Christians all over the world.

Later on other ways of attaining the same end will

perhaps be found more suitable. For we must be ever

ready to accommodate our family life to the specific spir-

itual needs of our children. I read lately of a mother

who every Saturday night put the open missal on the

home altar beside the burning vigil light, thus inviting

the adult members of her family to prepare themselves

spiritually for Sunday.

Of primary importance in the life of the family

is the day of our children's first holy Communion . From

the liturgical standpoint, this is the day when, for the

first time, the child may take a complete part in the

Mass, which is incomplete for the individual who does

not receive holy Communion. The younger the child,

the more it is the duty of the parents, especially of the

mother, to prepare him for the great event. She is best

able and fitted to find the right words to help him

realize the magnitude of the gift he is to receive. Mothers

should not easily relinquish such a holy and sublime

privilege

!

In this country priests and nuns in Catholic schools

often assume parental rights in the matter of religious

education. Parents are glad that they do not need to

bother with instructions which these competent persons

can provide. And sometimes even priests fail to see that

in this way Christian parents become more and more

9



confirmed in an attitude of indifference and never learn

to do their duty.

The experience of Christian parents in some Euro-

pean countries speaks in eloquent language on this mat-

ter. For decades they, too, relinquished to the Catholic

school as many as possible of their parental rights and

duties. They discontinued family morning prayer: for

did not the children pray in school? They no longer

discussed or talked of religious problems at home: what

was the need, since the priest or sisters were teaching in

school whatever the children had to know? They did

not attend Mass on Sunday as a family: there were

school and sodality Masses with different members of

the family in different pews and places.

Two or three generations later this irresponsible

attitude suddenly found itself facing an abyss—there
was no longer any Catholic school education. An awak-

ening followed, and with it a remarkable rebirth of

Catholic family life, a renewal of "the Church at home."

Can we not learn from this example instead of waiting

for a similar experience?

The less parents have to do in the important mat-

ter of religious education, as for instance in the spiritual

preparation for the first Communion day, the more

will they be concerned with such unimportant details

as dress, meals, gifts and amusements. Often enough

they help secularize the most important, the most sol-

emn day of a child’s life by making it a kind of show

for the family and the neighborhood, a day of much

excitement and external festivities. Study of the liturgy

will show the way to the right kind of family feast

for first Communion.

10



The climax of the day is, of course, the Commun-

ion Mass. But the entire family rejoices as it accompa-

nies one of its members who, for the first time, brings

home Christ Himself in his heart. That is the real rea-

son for the family feast. We decorate the house that

he may in later years and throughout life be reminded

of this holy and happy day. Nor will that purpose be

served by giving the children money or trinkets from

the “five and ten,” worthless or childish things that

soon are lost or thrown away. One single worthy gift,

perhaps a cross or statue for the home altar, paid for

with the help of the whole family circle, means much

more for the first Communion feast as well as for later

life than all the things we are now accustomed to give

or frequently find offered commercially for such occa-

sions.

We shall have to spend hours to work out a new

and suitable kind of celebration: solemn, reverential,

and joyful, considering the child and not the grownups

as the central point. It should, however, include a family

thanksgiving with perhaps a “Glory Be to God on

High” or a “Holy God We Praise Thy Name” imme-
diately after coming from church, and another reunion

of the family at the home altar at night.

There are two other sacraments that should hold

a similar place in the memory of the Christian: first

confession and confirmation . It is regrettable that these

are not properly celebrated and sufficiently remembered,

since both inaugurate a new period of religious or grace

life. Every effort should be made by the family to make

these days “holy days” in the true meaning of the word,

introducing the child to the significance of the ceremo-

nies, the prayers, and the character of the sacraments.

11



That is only possible if we parents prepare for these

days ourselves by study and prayer. Can we do too

much to enable our children to become earnest and

steadfast Christians? Such efforts will moreover give

parents a much deeper understanding of their religion

and will draw them into more intimate relations with

their children.

Confirmation especially, as the sacrament of holy

ordination for the laity, ought to receive far more atten-

tion than it does. Since it signifies a spiritual coming

of age, the family should in some manner take cogni-

zance of that fact. Perhaps the child on that day can

be given his own room, or desk, or the care of the home

altar; or the articles used at his baptism, such as the

candle or garment, might be presented him permanently.

Or it may be the time to present a much prized watch,

reminding him that from now on he is responsible for

the use or abuse of his time, that he has to learn punc-

tuality and trustworthiness as the most important vir-

tues of a soldier of Christ.

Wedding anniversaries in a Catholic home are also

primarily religious feasts and are most fittingly observed

by family attendance at Mass and family reception of

holy Communion. They offer a good opportunity also

to talk to the children about the liturgy and character

of matrimony, about the wedding Mass and the nuptial

blessing. And if our adolescents learn that the Church

has prepared a rite even for the engagement to mar-

riage, thereby elevating this extremely secularized event

into the sacred sphere of liturgical blessing, it may guard

them against some of the dangers that ordinarily threat-

en. If year after year we repeat for them the beautiful

prayers of the blessing of the wedding ring, there will

12



grow in them a clear understanding of the fact that

the importance of the ring has nothing to do with the

price or size of the diamond. If, moreover, the young

woman is familiar with the profound meaning of the

nuptial blessing, she will not easily forget the reverent

attitude of the Church towards the high dignity of the

bride and her vocation to Christian motherhood. Nor

will the young man fail to respect deeply this dignity

in the girl since he knows how highly it is esteemed by

the Church. Can we hear too often that matrimony was

enriched with a blessing “which neither the punishment

of original sin nor the curse of the deluge availed to

abolish”? The mother with her hard burden will never

feel deserted by Mother Church; and even the aged cou-

ple, repeating the liturgical prayers of their wedding day

on its anniversaries, will experience anew the holy mys-

tery of their being two in one “in Christ and in the

Church.”

Thus prepared and filled with the spirit and con-

cept of the holy mystery of matrimony, we shall not

be tempted—whenever a wedding occurs in our family
—to cover up and hide the marvelous spiritual signifi-
cance of this day behind the screen of secular etiquette

or “society ceremonial,” so dictatorial, so compulsory,

so absurdly punctilious with regard to accidentals that

no time remains to concentrate on the essential. The

more pomp and “show,” the less opportunity there is

for the sacramental dignity to manifest itself at the wed-

ding feast.

The sacrament of Holy Orders. We have already
indicated the close connection between the sacraments

of matrimony and Holy Orders, both of which are

social sacraments. Therefore there is a relation between

13



the Christian family and the priesthood. We find that

too many who regard themselves as good Catholics are

not conscious of this relation; they seem to think that

Holy Orders have meaning only for priests and priests-

to-be, Let us consider what would happen if there were

no priests with the apostolic power to bind and loose,

to offer sacrifice, to consecrate, to bless—and then let
us thank and praise God for this great gift!

Four times in the course of the liturgical year, at

the very beginning of each season of the natural year,

Mother Church invites all her children to be present

—

at least spiritually—at the holy Sacrifice during which
ordinations are conferred, that is, on the Ember Satur-

days. On these days the father should talk to his family

about the sacramental dignity and holiness of the epis-

copate and priesthood, the spiritual fatherhood, the

mystery of the ordained representative of Christ. In our

family prayers we ought to remember the bishop of

our diocese, the priests of our parish and of all the par-

ishes we ever belonged to, the priests who taught us and

who teach our children, the priests of the entire Church,

and last but certainly not least, all those who are called

to become priests and who are preparing for that high

calling, that the Holy Ghost may live and work in

them and with them for the sake of the coming king-

dom of Christ and that He may lead them to an eternal

reward in heaven.

If we should have the opportunity of witnessing

an ordination service in the cathedral church, we ought

to bring any sacrifice to give ourselves and our children

this great liturgical experience; it cannot help influencing

our whole attitude toward the representative of Christ.

14



Finally, the sacrament of extreme unction ought

also to be known by the family. On All Souls day or on

the anniversary of a death in our family we may prepare

a table for administering the last anointing, pray and

explain the rite of extreme unction, and say the prayers

for the dying, offering them for a person dying without

the priest or for any member of the family who may

die a sudden death.

When thus instructing our children about the “last

things of man,” we might also tell them about our own

last wishes, about our most beloved psalms or hymns

which we would like to have prayed at our deathbed,

about the place where we keep the blessed candles, and

about the cloth we have prepared for covering our hands

at the last Communion and our face when all is over.

It is to be understood that on all our family holy-

days the entire family begin festivities with holy Mass.

The children should see their parents kneeling and pray-

ing together, going to Communion together. They

should have a vivid recollection of father and mother

praying at home. I shall never forget my own father

attending holy Mass on Sundays, though he died years

ago. And I always have in mind the devotion and con-

templation of my mother kneeling in church or praying

at home. We, too, owe such memories to our children

so that they will not forget our example. Nowadays

it is almost exceptional that the family comes as a group

to the holy Sacrifice. That is regrettable. It is not the

best practice for children to be always in the school-

pews in church and for fathers and mothers to be in

special benches. Family worship strengthens family ties,

and frequent family days in our parishes would help to

achieve this end.

15



The Liturgical Year in the Home

Another and very important sphere of liturgical

life for the family is the cycle of the ecclesiastical year*

It makes present to us the mysteries of our election,

redemption and sanctification and makes us more fully

understand, love and live them* So it is essential that

not only each member of the family but the family as a

unit, as "the Church in miniature," follow the Church

in the way she suggests for a richer living of the litur-

gical life*

Advent . This holy season symbolizes for the

Christian the time during which the chosen people

waited for their Redeemer. Think of them suffering in

darkness, conscious of their sins and longing intensely

for salvation! And even as they prayed and prepared

themselves for the Advent in flesh, so we should look

forward to the Advent in glory, to the appearance of

Christ as judge and king on the last day. We must

prepare both our souls and our surroundings so as to

hold ourselves in holy readiness even for the "abomina-

tion of desolation" which must be endured before we

can "look up and lift up our heads, because our redemp-

tion is at hand."

At home in the living room we hang the evergreen

wreath, symbol of eternity, to which we attach four

candles, symbols of the time that, week by week, is

taking us nearer to the fulfilment of our salvation—in
the anniversary of His incarnation two thousand years

ago, and in the actuality of His future appearance "on

the clouds of heaven with power and majesty." As we

sing the wonderful songs of Advent, above all the deep-

ly moving Rotate coeli

,

we become filled with the under-

16



standing and the spirit of this important liturgical sea-

son.

Christmas . On this blessed day Jesus Christ, Son

of God, came into our earthly life, came down from

heaven in obedience and charity. In spite of a horrible,

secularized, commercialized Santa Claus, more and more

shameful each year, an unworthy parody of one of the

great saints of the early Church, in spite of belittling

sentimentality in songs, poems and pictures, in spite of

business and advertising, we must direct our family's

attention to the most holy mystery of the Incarnation,

to the appearance of God Himself, and to His last com-

ing at the end of the world. We shall never be tempted

to overlook the heroic and redemptive character of this

time if we celebrate feast after feast with the Church,

beginning with that of St. Stephen, the first martyr, and

continuing with those of the Holy Innocents, the Holy

Name, and the Holy Family, on to the culmination in

Epiphany when Christ's divinity is manifested in the

three mysteries: the adoration of the Wise Men, or the

calling of the gentiles; the first miracle in Cana; and the

baptism in the Jordan by St. John.

This does not mean that we should not have a

crib in the home. On the contrary, we should help the

children relive this holy history, from the vain search

for an inn to the flight into Egypt, by representing all

phases of the Christmas story with the statues of the

crib.

As far as Christmas gifts are concerned, let us em-

phasize their true meaning, now so generally forgotten:

overpowered by God's generosity in giving His only-

begotten Son as the Redeemer of mankind, Christians

feel urged to imitate in a limited manner God's great

17



love and liberality by spreading happiness among rela-

tives and friends through gifts. Only if our gifts—small
though they be—are borne along on a wave of true
charity will they be worthy to lie beside the crib, which

represents the real Gift, the Gift of all gifts, without

which we should still be sitting in darkness and in the

slavery of sin.
4

Epiphany . Liturgically, this feast has always

ranked higher than Christmas. Beautiful and ancient

customs are related to this day, as the blessing of homes

and of food. In certain parts of Europe, the children

still bring food (bread and eggs) , salt, incense and chalk

to church to be blessed. The bread and eggs are then

eaten at home, and all rooms are incensed. With the

blessed chalk the father writes the initials of the three

Magi (19 C + M + B + 42) on each door to remind
us that we too are called to adore Christ the King, and

that all our comings and goings be but an unswerving

answer to that call.

Candlemas . Carrying a candle for each member of

the family, we accompany our Blessed Mother on her

way to the temple. This candle is blessed so that the

blessing may be with us on all feast days of the coming

year, on all days of sorrow, in storms and sickness too.

4Thus we can easily get rid of the ‘‘white lies” about ‘‘Santa”

or the Angels entering the home at night with the presents. It is

the Chcistchild who presents our family with the abundance of
grace and happiness and peace; it is His love which urges us to find

means to represent in visible and tangible form His great gift of

Himself to us, so that we may to some extent understand the

great mystery of the Incarnation. Certainly, let us do all in our

power to surround this entire season with the mystery proper to

Christmastide, but let us abstain from telling our children so-

called pious lies. Too often they undermine the children’s confidence

in the words of their parents and they can never do justice to the

great mystery to which we are trying to introduce them.

18



And if we expect a new member in the family or intend

to become a godparent, we will have blessed a large

and, if possible, a genuine beeswax candle to be the

baptismal, communion, bridal and death candle of the

expected child. Two other candles are also provided in

case one of the family should fall sick and have to

receive Holy Viaticum at home.

If there should be no candle procession in church

or if we are unable to attend, we may have one at home,

going through the house with our blessed candles, sing-

ing the praises of God and His Blessed Mother and re-

peating the prayers of the candle-blessing. This way of

celebrating religious feasts never bores the children; in

fact, they can never get enough of it.

Lent. Every season of the natural year has its par-

ticular tasks, especially for the husbandman; the same

holds true of the Christian life with regard to the dif-

ferent seasons of the liturgical year. Spring occupies a

very important place in the life of the tiller of the soil;

as far as man is concerned, spring decides what the crop

will be. Similarly in the life of grace, Lent holds an al-

most decisive position (Lent is but another word for

spring) . The more carefully we put away the deeds of

winter, the “dead” deeds, the deeper we plow in order

that the new seed may find a well-prepared soil enriched

with the good deeds of fasting and prayer, the more

shall we enjoy the vigorous plants that will spring up

and the abundance of the harvest. The picture of the

farmer and the gardener is very useful and impressive

for the children; it becomes the source of numerous

explanations and examples, and besides is a perfect para-

ble for the mystery of the cooperation of God and man

toward one and the same end.

19



Just as Nature renews herself every spring, so dur-

ing the Church's spring we are encouraged to begin

anew with the catechumens. We prepare for the renewal
of our baptism, we suffer with Christ for our sins, we

are buried with Him so that we may also arise with

Him to a new life of grace and glory.

It is as human as it is Catholic to celebrate the

three days before Ash Wednesday as gaily as possible,

to fill them with good cheer and childlike fun; this pre-

lenten celebration helps so much toward a serious lenten

observance. The Sundays of Lent, too, are intended by

Mother Church as a kind of pause in order to relax on

the way, in order to gather new strength for the follow-

ing week. Laetare Sunday is distinguished by its entire

liturgy: as the rose-colored dawn announces the coming

day, so the joy of this Sunday—with its gay vestments,
its music, its flowers—foretells the tenfold joy of Eas-
ter. For the sake of a really holy Lent let us follow the

wise psychology of the Church!

On Ash Wednesday or on the preceding Sunday

let us study the liturgy of the lenten season and try to

make the children understand the symbolism of the

blessed ashes. Let us decide together how we shall cele-

brate Lent in our family, how each one may do his

share according to his capacity.

Ash Wednesday should be a quiet and earnest day

in our home. In a silent procession we may gather up

the palms of the preceding year and carefully burn them.

This burning of the old palm we may interpret as the

"burning" of one of our faults which we will try to

overcome as a special personal lenten sacrifice. The little

ceremony will impress the children very deeply and

help them to keep their resolutions.

20



As we enter Lent and prepare for the renewal of

our souls and of our religious life under the guidance

of the Church, our daily prayer should broaden and

deepen through contact with the day’s liturgy. We must

try hard to keep the fast and to practice self-denial and

mortification. Our example will foster in the children

the right or wrong idea of this lenten practice.

Step by step we progress to Passiontide, which

urges us to follow Christ on the way of His cross, and

to Palm Sunday, the high point before Holy Week

—

that period of deepest mourning. We devoutly take

home the blessed palm and again have a "procession”

through the house while we decorate every room with

this sign of Christ’s victory, the while singing His

praises with psalms and hymns. But, then, confessing

that we too were among those who shouted CruciRge!

after the triumphant Hosanna

,

we break some of the

palms, bind the pieces into little crosses and wear them

through Holy Week as daily reminders that we must

patiently bear the cross with Christ if we wish to share

in His glorious resurrection.

Holy Week holds a very important place in the

liturgy. The more we prepare for it by thinking it over

at home—and this is true of all feasts and sacraments

—

the more intelligently and fruitfully shall we participate

in it. It is regrettable that we no longer take home the

Easter fire. As for the Easter water, whose consecration

we witness, the family should take it home and regard

it as a precious symbol of their renewal in Christ.

There should be another family "procession” on the

evening of Holy Saturday, when the rooms and the

members of the household are blessed with the new

water which may then be placed on the home altar. In

21



memory of our submersion in sin and emergence from it

through the grace of Christ's death, we then renew our

baptismal vows.

Easter . The joy of resurrection, the exultation of

the Alleluia must fill our home, now decorated with the

first green growths of renewed nature. It should be a

solemn religious act of the father to bless with Easter

water the various foods of which we have denied our-

selves during Lent, reminding his family of the good-

ness and providence of God. This blessing used to be

given in church after Easter service; but as long as pas-

tors do not renew the usage, the father as the "priest"

of the family is surely entitled to perform it. The

Roman Ritual has a special blessing for the Easter lamb,

Easter eggs ,
5

bread and new fruits. In some rural dis-

tricts this blessing is still given by the pastor.

Pentecost . In contrast to medieval times, the Holy

Ghost has today become an "unknown God." Even

many Catholics regard Pentecost as they do any other

Sunday and do not know what it means. From the

liturgical viewpoint Pentecost is the second culmination

of Eastertide. It is the birthday of the Church, when

the Holy Spirit, "without whom nothing good can be

done on earth" and whose coming was promised by

Christ, filled the whole world and all living beings with

His grace and activity. Reason enough to praise God in

His Trinity, to invite the Holy Spirit to abide with

our family, and to go out into the reborn fields to find

BWe must again consider the Easter egg in its true light—as
the symbol of life, the symbol of the resurrected Christ victoriously

breaking the shell of death. And for that reason let us return to
the venerable custom of decorating the Easter eggs with Christian

and Easter symbols instead of with the childish and nonsensical

pictures now so commonly found.

22



His footprints! This means that our outing on Pente-

cost should be different from our ordinary family out-

ings. Pentecost is also the proper day for the renewal

of our confirmation, by which we were anointed for the

universal priesthood and filled with the Holy Ghost.

And it is the proper day to celebrate the birth of the

Church of Christ, founded on the rock of Peter, to give

thanks for being called unto her, to pray for her, and

to renew our promise of fidelity and obedience to her.

Here rightly should follow a consideration of the

bright and colorful wreath of the other liturgical feasts:

of the Blessed Trinity and Christ the King, of our

Blessed Mother and of all the saints. But it would take

too long. Since the Church counts her days according to

her feasts, we too should learn to do so again. Our great-

grandparents did not know a better calendar, even for

sowing and harvesting! Let us therefore join liturgically

in her motherly remembrance of all her children who

"fought the good fight/' who "finished the course,"

who "kept the faith," in a life which essentially was

not at all different from ours. Let us take on the calm,

the love and the joy with which she venerates the mem-

ory of her saints. Ernest Hello says: "The mountains

may fall to pieces one day; but if on this day there

should occur the feast of a little shepherdess, for in-

stance, of St. Germana, the Church will celebrate the

feast of the little shepherdess with the unbroken calm

that is her gift from eternity. Let the noise of peo-

ples and kings around her grow as wild as it may: she

never forgets one of her poor, one of her beggars, one of

her martyrs. Storms or centuries do not change her

course. Despite the storms she retraces with calm steps

the course of centuries to celebrate the glory of a girl,

23



unknown in her own life and now dead for a thousand

years/'

We should know and study the lives and virtues

of at least our family patron saints, of those whose

names we bear and who were called to lead us through-

out life to salvation. At least their feasts ought to be-

come family feasts. We should know their biographies,

their books, letters, and the documents of their canoni-

zation. We should find out why our parents chose these

names and these saints, because we do not get them by

accident but through divine Providence .
6

Perhaps this

name of ours corresponds closely to that name where-

with God called us unto life and wherewith He will call

us to judgment, the "name which no one knows."

Once in a while on days of importance to the fam-

ily we may say a family litany, calling on all the fam-

ily's patron saints whose names we have received in

baptism and confirmation, to make us conscious that

they are ready, and ever will be, to guide us and help us

in all the difficulties of our life.

Daily Growth

There still remains the smallest liturgical cycle,

the day and its worship. It should be the fruit and

result of liturgical family life that we pray even the

daily prayers with the Church, Lauds and Prime in the

0How unbecoming, and yet, alas! how common (with shame
we must confess it) for Catholics to follow the custom of their
pagan neighbors in choosing names for their children. Those regen-

erated in baptism as sons of God in Christ and called to His service
ought proudly to bear the names of those elect members of the

mystical body, the Saints in heaven; their example will incite to a

holier life, their intercession will afford protection. Hence very fit-

tingly the Roman Ritual forbids the imposition in baptism of lewd,
mythical and foolish names, or those of impious and godless men.

24



morning, Vespers and Compline in the evening, as well

as the meal-prayers of the Church. Of course we shall

rarely do so well as that. There are too many obstacles,

external ones at least. But by ever keeping this ideal in

mind as the ultimate goal, we can prepare for it. A

psalm or a hymn added to the children’s prayers, vary-

ing with the liturgical seasons, makes the family prayer

more interesting and beloved. Once in a while on fam-

ily feasts or holydays, whenever we have more solemn

prayer, we may say Vespers or Compline. Unfamiliar

words and phrases may be explained to the children so

that they can readily follow and understand. Thus

they gradually grow into the daily rhythm of the litur-

gy till they are ready to pray and even sing parts of

the Office with father and mother, at least on Sundays.

Even if we never should succeed in having a family

practice such as this, how beautiful, how consoling it is

to know that the Church, in her servants, is praying

all day long for us and in our stead, while we do the

earthly things which duty demands for the praise and

honor of God.

Home Altar. Very important for the “home

church” is the home altar. Every family should have

a place to kneel and pray. A picture on the wall or a
statue, two candles—what is Sunday night prayer with-
out candles!—a small cross on a chest, and a cloth
which may be made or stitched by our children—these
can make up the family altar. We reflect the life of the
Church by changing pictures, texts and prayers accord-

ing to the liturgical time, the feasts and the saints of the

day. In magazines and calendars we find good religious

pictures which may be put in simple frames or pasted

on cardboard. Or we may cut out in different liturgical

25



colors the symbols of the festal season; or better still,

we may help the children to do so. We should realize
that the simplest things carefully made by ourselves,

with love and understanding, are far more worth-while

than all the trinkets out of a dime store or even more

expensive articles which can never, in all their sweetness

and unreality, reflect the true liturgical spirit.

Daily Prayer Life . Let us not neglect to instruct

our children, and ourselves too, about the meaning of

the signs we use in our prayers. Since we are composed

of soul and body, both must join in the worship we

give to God, one helping the other to bring about the

right spirit and attitude for prayer.

The sign of the cross should be the thoughtful

and respectful remembrance of that indelible seal which

was impressed on our souls in the solemn rite of bap-

tism: "Accipe signum crucis tarn in fronte quam in corde

—Receive the sign of the cross upon the forehead and
upon the heart. . . .” It is the sign of Christ's bitter death

that redeemed us from being eternally lost, the sign given

us as a weapon and never-failing protection against the

temptations and onslaughts of Satan, a sacred sign that

dedicates our head, mouth, heart, right and left arms

with all their potentialities and powers to the service

of Christ.

The folding of the hands should be the expression

of the undivided concentration and contemplation we

give to the words we speak to God, an expression of

the cessation of all distracting activity, of our being vol-

untarily bound for Christ—Christ's prisoners. We may
explain this better by recalling the impressive ceremony

in the ordination of a priest. After the anointing of his

hands, the bishop binds the folded hands together,

26



making him Christ’s prisoner now and forever. Again,

in folding our hands we may recall that the right and

left are woven together forming a unity; and ceasing

from all labor and every diversion they express our

union with Christ. Turning from all earthly things, we

look now to spiritual things with all the strength of our

mind and will. How eloquent the prayers of our hands

can be even though voice and lips be silent!

The kneeling posture should be the outward sign

of the need we have to profess our human smallness

before the majesty of God. Thus we men, being made

out of dust, bow down to the dust in humility, calling

out of the depths unto God in the highest. It is the posi-

tion of the servant, the sinner, the beggar, and the

needy.

By standing we express our readiness to listen to

God's word, and our willingness to labor wherever and

whenever God wishes. We stand to receive His final
directions and His last blessing before leaving for work

or for the fight in His cause. “Here I am,” we say,

“ready to hear and ready to obey.” It is the position of

the knight and soldier of Christ.

Family Sacramentals. In speaking of the liturgy

and the family we must not omit the rather unknown

and neglected subject of the sacramentals intended for

the family. It would be real Catholic Action to make

known again to everyone the blessing of the house

and the home, the blessing of an expectant mother and

of the mother after childbirth, the blessings of the

children in the home, in church, and especially in times

of sickness. We find it hard now to understand that
once the liturgy was so close and so near to the natural

events in family life that, for instance, it accompanied

27



the newly-married couple to their home, prayed over

their house and blessed their chamber:

Bless, O Lord, God almighty, this place, that

they may abide here in health, purity, victory,

strength, humility, goodness and meekness, the

fulfilment of the law, and thanksgiving to God

the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit; and

may this blessing remain over this place and on all

those who dwell here now and forever. Amen.

In blessing the bed chamber, the priest says:

Bless, O Lord, this bed chamber. Let all who
dwell in it stand firm in Thy peace and may they

persevere in obedience to Thy will; may they see

many years and a numerous posterity and finally

attain to the kingdom of heaven. Amen.

And when faith and love have borne their fruit,

Mother Church comes again to visit the home and prays

with the young mother "that by the firmness of her

faith she may be protected from every evil."

The liturgy blesses the mother and the growing

life within her. It also blesses the home, praying that

the angels may dwell therein and watch over mother

and child. There is hardly another time in a mother's

life when she will appreciate such a blessing more than

during the period of pregnancy, when she is filled with

hope and also with fear, with joy as well as sorrow,

deprived as she often is during these days of the consola-

tion that comes from frequent participation in the holy

Sacrifice. It would indeed be difficult to forsake a Church

that follows her children and stays with them in their

28



most difficult hours and watches over them with such

maternal care.

And as soon as the newborn child has been reborn

by water and the Holy Ghost, as soon as the mother

is able to give thanks personally for the gift of life,

both natural and supernatural, by means of a solemn

visit to the church, Mother Church joins her in joy and

thanksgiving. She sends her priest, vested in surplice and

stole, to greet the mother with psalms at the church

door, to bless her with holy water and to lead her rev-

erently with the stole to the altar where together they

praise the goodness of God and offer prayers for the

mother and the child.

Let us pray. Almighty everlasting God, who,

through the delivery of the blessed Virgin Mary,

hast turned the pains of the faithful at childbirth

into joy, look mercifully upon this Thine hand-

maid, coming in gladness to Thy temple to offer

up her thanks: and grant that, after this life, by

the merits and intercession of the same blessed

Mary, she may merit to attain, together with her

offspring, to the joys of everlasting happiness.

Through Christ our Lord. Amen.

What has become of this wonderful rite? What

remains of this feast day not only of the family but of

the whole community as it was observed centuries ago,

and as it is still observed in a few rural communities?

Accompanied in a joyful procession by her neighbors

and friends, attired in holiday clothes, the young mother

brought her child to church to give thanks to God.

Little remains, unfortunately, of this observance of the

mother’s first visit to the church after childbirth. The

respectful reception by the priest at the entrance of the

29



church, an honor which is shown only to the bishop

visiting the church officially, is now confused with the

rites before baptism, when the unbaptized person is not

allowed to enter the church before answering the ques-

tions and receiving the exorcisms. The lighted candle

in the mother's hands symbolizes the new life that was

enkindled in baptism from Christ's divine life, and thus

the candle represents the child itself (nowadays, unfor-

tunately, the child, because of its weakness or because

of danger of exposure, is not brought along to church)

.

The blessing with holy water, too, what else is it but

another mark of respect for the mother? But all this

has been misinterpreted, and the rite has come to be

considered a ceremony of purification which, needless to

say, is entirely at variance with the Christian concept

of matrimony. If we read and study this rite we will

quickly be convinced that the Church never intended it

to be the painfully embarrassing act that is so distasteful

to most mothers. Let us in kindness to our friends

tell them about this rite and its significance; we might

also accompany them to their "churching," thus help-

ing to dispel any thought of its being some sort of

public penance. Of course, it is not necessary to receive

this blessing, but if it is received in the right spirit and

with understanding it becomes another source of joy

and grace extended to us by Mother Church, after many

weeks of sorrow and suffering.

Time goes on. The child grows. Should it have no

further contact with the liturgy for the next seven or

more years? That would indeed seem to involve a curi-

ous reflection on "Mother" Church. Actually, during

this time we have the blessing for children who are

brought to church, often administered on Christmas, or

30



on the feast of the Holy Innocents, in a special service

for children. There is also a blessigg for children given

when the priest visits the home. Could there be parents

who would not be grateful to the priest for praying

over their children? A third blessing is provided for
the sick child.

f<

Is someone sick among you? Let him

bring in the priests of the Church/ ' But does this not

include the infant and the child? The liturgy answers

the question by giving us the blessing for the sick child.

It would be a work of real charity and pastoral care for

souls if the priest were to make a habit of visiting not

only the sick adults of his flock but the sick children as

well, and of praying over them. For the visitation of

sick children the ritual gives three beautiful prayers:

O God, to whom all things grow, and by whom
they are strengthened when grown, stretch forth

Thy hand upon Thy servant who is sick at a ten-

der age: that recovering the vigor of health, he

may arrive at the fulness of years, and always give

unto Thee a faithful and grateful service all the

days of his life. Through our Lord. . . .

O Father of mercies and God of all consolation,
who providing in manifold tenderness for the good

of Thy creatures grantest the grace of healing not
only to the soul but also to the body, deign to raise

this sick child from his bed of suffering, and to

restore him safe and sound to Thy holy Church
and to his parents; so that all the days of his pro-

longed life he may increase in grace and wisdom

before Thee and men, serve Thee in justice and

holiness, and give due thanks to Thy mercy.
Through Christ ....

31



O God, who in a wonderful order appointest
the ministries of angels and of men, grant in Thy

mercy that they who ever stand ministering to

Thee in heaven may also guard the life of this

child upon earth. Through Christ . .

Placing his right hand on the forehead of the

child : May Jesus, the Son of Mary, the salvation

and Lord of the world, through the merits and

intercession of His apostles Peter and Paul and of

all His saints be merciful to you and full of ten-

derness. Amen,

Although the child may not be able to appreciate

this touching rite, the sorrowing parents assuredly will.

And if God should nevertheless ask of them the life

of their child, this blessing and prayer may obtain for

them the strength to make the sacrifice in full confor-

mity to the divine will.

As can be seen from the wording of the prayers,

they may also be recited by the father and mother when

the visit of the priest cannot be arranged, or in fact

whenever circumstances suggest the use of these beauti-

ful prayers of the Church's liturgy.

Though we close here, we are quite aware that

much more can be said on the subject—and done. We
pray that the Holy Ghost will complete the incomplete,

He
‘

'without whom nothing good can be done on

earth."

32