OPENING PRAYER 
Come, Holy Spirit, fill the hearts of the faithful 

and enkindle in them the fire of Your divine love. 
Send forth Your Spirit, and they shall be created. 
And You shall renew the face of the earth. 

Let us pray. 

O God, who by the light of the Holy Spirit in-
structs the hearts of the faithful, grant us by that 
same Holy Spirit ever to love and cherish what is 
right and just, and constantly to enjoy His con-
solations. Through Christ our Lord. Amen. 

This booklet is designed to introduce the Christian Family Movement. Use 
it as a guide for a jew bi-wee\ly meetings of five to seven interested couples. 
If after the fourth meeting you agree to continue, send for the regular begin-
ning boo\ called For Happier Families from which these meetings are ta\en, 
and join thousands of others who find in CFM a way to cultivate dialogue 
between husband and wife, parents and children, and families and the 
community. We must learn from one another and learn to love one another. 

Use the order blan\ on inside bac\ cover. 



THE ROLE OF THE LAYMAN 

"I have known lay apostolate groups which are closed sections, study 
groups, friendly gatherings, in which the participants split hairs four ways, 
carry on endless discussions on nothing, and drain their minds and hearts 
dry. They beat around the bush; they never go to the center of things. 
They admire each other and do nothing. They bore each other methodically. 
They fear the world of time, they are afraid they may slip into it. They 
have no spirit, they have no courage, they have no daring. Inevitably, 
people who are worth anything stay away from such groups. The lay 
apostolate will not attract worthwhile human beings unless it is engaged with 
the human, and therefore with the things of time. More than ever the cur-
rent of history is toward action, toward whole hearted action, and not 
toward talk—talk which is childish, niggling inanity alongside the profound 
transformation for which the world-is waiting. There are methods for train-
ing altar boys. These methods are not suited to lay apostles, because the 
aim of the lay apostolate is not to form altar boys. Its aim is to bend social 
pressure in the direction of life. 

"We have to drop double-talk . . . Matter exists. The body exists. Society 
exists. We can't get along without matter, without the body, nor without 
society. A disembodied lay apostle would be the practical negation of 
these realities in the midst of which we live and which are part of our-
selves—matter, the body, society. It would constitute the sin of angelism. 

"In taking flesh, the lay apostolate comes out of its dream and gets into 
reality, into the social, the material, the economic, and the temporal. It 
acts." 

Let the Lay Apostolate Take Flesh, 
Cardinal Saliege, Archbishop of Toulouse, France. 



m 

# 

% 
# 

/f j O é / q O 

N O H O L D I N G S IN I N D - F O R H O L D I N G S E N T E R d h D E P R E S 

O C L C ; 8 9 1 2 2 0 7 R e e e t a t ; n E n t r c h 8 2 1 1 0 1 
T y p e ; a B i b lvls m G o v t p u b ; L a n g ; 

E n e 1 v 1 ; I C o n f p u b : 0 C t r y 
0 M o d -r-e-c-: - - Fsst-schr i -0 -Con-t-
a Int. l v l s D a t e s : 1 9 6 0 , 1 9 6 9 

R e p r 
I-ndx 
D e s c 

1 
2 
3 

D I S P L A Y R E C D S E N D 
U s e d ; 8 2 1 1 0 1 

e n g S o u r c e ; d I l l u s ; 
i l u D a t t. p : q M / F / B ; 0 0 

í p w n I 

4 
5 
6 
7 
8 
9 

10 

0 1 0 
0 4 0 
0 9 0 
0 9 0 
0 4 9 
11 0 
2 4 5 
260 
3 0 0 
610 

I C G c I C C d m / c 
B X 2 3 4 7 . 8 . F 3 b L 6 
b 

I N D U 
2 0 C h r i s t i a n F a m i l y 
12 A l o o k a t C F M . 
0 C h i c a g o , 1 1 1 . , c 

2 0 p .
 ;

 c 2 2 c m . 
20 C h r i s t i a n F a m i l y 

M o v e m e n t , w e n 

El 9 6 ? 3 

M o v e m e n t . w c n 

Ji 



« 
% 
§ 
« 



INTRODUCTION 

What Is the Christian Family Movement? 

It is a married couples' movement. Couples come to meetings to-
gether; they do most of CFM's work together. 

It is concerned that people live fully human and Christian lives. 
The genius of CFM is that it offers us a way to show Christ-like love 
not only for our own family but also for other families and indeed 
all other people. So, we know from the start that the title, For Hap-
pier Families, means "for happier families and people everywhere." 

Each group in CFM is made up of five or six couples, usually 
from the same parish, who meet in one another's home: 

• to know Christ more deeply through what he said and did; 

• to learn about Christ's action in the liturgy and to discover how 
to be more fully a part of the worshipping people of God; 

• and to work out how to join this worship to daily life. 
The method CFM groups use to carry out this plan, especially the 

last part, is the Inquiry. In an Inquiry a group discusses a situation 
on the basis of facts they have gathered between meetings, makes a 
judgment on it, and decides to act. 

What Is a CFM Meeting? 

I CHRIST THE WORD - The SCRIPTURE part of the meeting 
(about 15 minutes) enables couples to share their reactions to Scrip-
ture passages. Couples are usually pleased to discover how much 
more meaning they find when they talk about Christ—sometimes 
for the first time in their adult lives—that they meet Christ as a 
person—hear him speak to them intimately as he did to the apostles 
—in the gospel. 

A few simple questions are printed to help get discussion going. 

II CHRIST THE LIFE - The LITURGY part of the meeting (also 
about 15 minutes) is a time to look at the Church as the people of 
God. In this introductory book we talk over how and why we wor-
ship as a people. We come to see how the sacraments bring us close 
to God. And we explore the idea of the people as the Church. 

Again, a few questions are raised—not student-teacher questions 
but discussion-starters. 

III CHRIST ACTING THROUGH THE PEOPLE - I n the S O C I A L I N -
QUIRY, the most important part of the meeting—about 45 minutes 
—the couples look at the world around them and ask themselves, 
"Would Christ feel that all measures up to his human and divine 



standards in our families, in our neighbors, in our parish, at our 
work, in our community, in our political life, in the affairs of 
nations, in our cultural life?" 

In order to do this "looking around" is an orderly way, CFM uses 
a method proven by other groups in the lay apostolate and singled 
out for high praise by Pope John XXIII (in his encyclical, Christian-
ity and Social Progress), called 

OBSERVE 

JUDGE 

ACT 

a. The members of the group OBSERVE the life around them (a 
quick glance at the index on pages 4 and 5 will give you an idea of 
some of the topics). 

b. They JUDGE what they see in the light of the Church's teaching 
or, in other words, Christ's teaching, notably his teaching through 
the Popes and the Council; in the light of what is fully human, 
fully Christian. 

c. They agree to ACT, as they think necessary—a simple action that 
will make a situation or condition of life more pleasing to Christ. 

Some Things That CFM Is Not 

. . . CFM is not a social club. Couples get to know and accept each 
other on a different basis than in the usual social gatherings. And 
they do find friendships more enduring and more solidly grounded. 

.. . CFM is not intended solely for "personal spiritual development." 
Of course, every organization of the Church has this as its goal, 
because every Christian has this as his goal. And members of CFM 
state as their most common reaction to CFM that it has, in fact, been 
of great help in developing a deeper spiritual life within them. 

Still, the main effort of CFM is to direct the concerns and the 
efforts of its members outward 

—toward that neighbor whom we must love, because he is Christ, 

—toward that world which Christ so loved that he died to redeem it, 

—toward that world of lay life in which we, as laymen, can especially 

help t o complete his redemption. 

.. . It is not confined to improving one's own family, or even to those 
concerns that we readily agree are family concerns. As one cardinal 
put it, "It is wrong to contain the apostolate of the family within 
the walls of the family. The apostolate of the family is as wide as 
the apostolate of the Church." 



How Can We Start CFM? 

Talk with your parish priest. Explain to him that you would like to 
start CFM and ask him about a chaplain. 

Often the priest may suggest other couples who might be inter-
ested. Before starting, you should find out if there are other CFM 
groups in your diocese. They may be able to help you start. (The 
CFM office at 1655 Jackson Boulevard, Chicago, Illinois 60612, has 
a list of groups.) 

If yours is the first CFM group in your parish, a common plan is to 
rotate the leading of the meeting until every couple has led once, and 
then to choose a leader. Often the chaplain names the leader. Some-
times one couple emerges as the natural choice of the group: they 
have the time, the ability, the interest. Your group will be the 
section: the basic CFM group. 

If there is already a section in your parish, a couple from the sec-
tion will be leading your group, which is called an action group. 
But leadership is a part of every CFM couple's future; so some 
groups rotate the leading of the Scripture and Liturgy portions of 
the meeting in order to give everyone experience. 

Outline of a CFM Meeting 

OPENING PRAYER (Inside front cover) 

Sometimes groups sing a hymn which expresses the feelings of the 
group. Some groups find that spontaneous prayers reflect the con-
cerns of the group. Anyone should feel free to offer such a prayer 
at the beginning or end of the meeting. 

SCRIPTURE 

LITURGY 

CHAPLAIN'S REMARKS 

These should be brief. The accent should be on saying what en-
courages. The chaplain can highlight good insights of the members, 
suggest unifying threads in a scattered discussion, add ideas at times. 

REPORTS 

SOCIAL INQUIRY 

Social Inquiries are introduced at the end of one meeting and dealt 
with at the next. The members preview the up-coming meeting by 
reading the Observes and making assignments as needed, to be sure 
that a good set of facts will be available. More on this below. 



CHAPLAIN'S REMARKS 

The chaplain should be present at the meetings of the nuclear group 
in each parish, called the section. But except on rare occasions he 
should not take part in the discussions. If he were to talk during the 
meeting, even to answer questions, everyone would defer to him as 
an expert and this might discourage members from thinking for 
themselves, from speaking their thoughts and feelings. He speaks 
briefly twice at each meeting—after the liturgy discussion and at the 
end of the meeting. 

The handbook, CFM and the Priest, can help a chaplain to under-
stand this new style of guidance and its meaning in forming lay 
apostles. His remarks should not just be on the "pious side." He can 
reassure the members that concern with problems of lay life really is 
a big part of their human concern and of a genuine spiritual growth. 
He may reinforce their will to take actions, even when they are 
difficult. And he will tell them again and again, in words and man-
ner, that he believes in them, has confidence that they will grow in 
goodness and competence. 

PLAN YOUR NEXT MEETING 

CLOSING PRAYER (inside back cover) 

(REFRESHMENTS) 

This has been placed in parentheses because it is and it isn't part of 
the meeting. A short social with simple refreshments such as rolls 
and coffee helps members to know and understand one another bet-
ter. It should not become more important than the meeting proper. 

More about the Social Inquiry 

Married couples have many roles to fill. Carrying out their duties as 
parish member, employer or employee, and citizens of their nation 
and of the world is their role as lay people in the Church and in 
the world. All of us agree that it is important to do as well as possible 
in each of these roles. T h e problem is: How can we figure out what, 
concretely, we ought to do—right now. 

The inquiry method of OBSERVE, JUDGE, ACT is accepted 
today as an effective way to give ourselves on-the-job training in 
how to live out these many roles. 

Group discussion of actual happenings is the kind of adult educa-
tion that can produce practical results and can change the adult 
in the process. It gives persons who have had experience and are 
willing to learrt more a chance to evaluate a situation. 

In the meeting, members learn-by-doing and from each other to 
think through ways to improve daily life—both their own everyday 
performance and the actual conditions of life around them. They 



weigh this reality against what is humanly right, against what 
Christ teaches. 

Between meetings, members learn-by-doing, too. They collect facts 
in conversation with friends, neighbors, those at work, and people 
one meets casually, in reading, by going to meetings of groups. 
Having considered the facts, weighed them against what is right, and 
sorted out the do-able from the impractical, they act. 

Leading That First Meeting 

In outline, the first meeting is no different from any other. But in 
that first meeting you are "saying" many things to those who have 
come, by the way you work as a leader. You want to create an easy, 
open climate in which people will say, freely and truly, what they 
think and feel. It's not like a meeting run with Robert's Rules of 
Order. 

Experts tell us that some very simple guidelines can help to set a 
new group off on the path to effective thought and work in this new 
format. Here are a few of their pointers, adapted to CFM's meeting 
plan: 

• Meet, from the very beginning, in homes. It helps to keep 
things casual, friendly, informal. 

• Take timé for couples to introduce themselves, with some 
brief personal detail. Try to get to know the first names of 
all present. 

• The husband of the leader couple actually leads the meeting. 
The wife can help indirectly to keep the meeting moving 
along. 

• Offer a BRIEF simple explanation of CFM. 

• Invite someone to read the scripture passage, identifying this 
as one of the three key parts of the meeting. 

• Wait. Give people time to think, to re-read. Choose your 
opening sentence for the discussion carefully. Be sure it 
doesn't invite a "yes" or "no" answer. Make it very open. 
One might simply ask: "What does this passage mean to 
you" or "What particularly struck you in this passage?" 
Then wait—patiently—for someone to venture an answer. 

• Listen. Don't interrupt or correct people. You are not a 
teacher. Don't aim to cover all the ideas in your mind. Your 
job is to draw ideas from others and to keep the group dis-
cussing. Discussion about the Scripture passage should be 
limited to 15 minutes. 

• Try to sense when enough has been said and move on. 
• Invite someone else (another family, a different sex) to read 



the Liturgy selection. Again, keep your first question open. 
Remember, no matter how tempted, don't call on someone 
to answer. Wait. 

• Again, listen. During lulls, help the group to see where they 
agree; where they are vague. Don't decide. End the discus-
sion before it loses momentum. 

• Try to keep the discussion of the Scripture and Liturgy sec-
tions of the meeting short. Sometimes these parts of the 
meeting take up time that ought to be given to the Social 
Inquiry. 

• Ask the chaplain for his brief comments on the Scripture 
and Liturgy discussions. 

• Move on to the Social Inquiry. Make clear that this is the 
main part of the meeting. Begin by saying something like 
this: "The Social Inquiry of the first meeting is about some-
thing near and dear to CFM—neighbors. Let's talk over 
what we mean by our neighborhood. . . . Who'd like to get 
us started?" 

• When five minutes remain, ask the chaplain for his remarks. 
When he concludes, lead the closing prayer, and ask the 
chaplain for his blessing. 

• Arrange for the next meeting. ("Who would like to have the 
meeting at their house?") People usually want addresses and 
phone numbers. 

Quotations from the documents of Vatican Council II are from the 
following collection: 

The Documents of Vatican II, an Angelus Book, The America Press, 
New York, 1966, $.95. 

Scriptural quotations are from the Jerusalem Bible. 



MEETING 1 

PRAYER (see inside front cover) 

SCRIPTURE [15 minutes) 
Ask for a volunteer to read this passage from the Scripture. 

Doing God 's Wi l l 

Meanwhile, the disciples were urging him, 'Rabbi, do have something to 
eat;' • but he said, 'I have food to eat that you do not know about.' • So the 
disciples asked one another, • 'Has someone been bringing him food?' • But 
Jesus said: 

'My food 
is to do the will of the one who sent me, 
and to complete his work.' 

JOHN 4, 31-34 

DISCUSSION 
—What do you think Christ meant by his answer to the disciples? 
—Discuss "food" as Christ uses the word here. 
— H o w do we go about doing the will of God each day? 

I l l ' 
Many couples have found it helpful to take an individual 
action based on the scripture discussion. 

The leader should use questions to encourage people to 
discuss ideas and express feelings freely. He should' not call on 
anyone by name to answer. If there is a long pause, he should 
not worry or ask another question. His waiting shows every-
one in the group that in CFM the members arc responsible 
for the discussion. 

Anyone should feel free to start the discussion or to take 
pari in it at any point. This first discussion should be shorter 
than in future meetings, to allow time for questions the group 
might have about CFM. 

Be sure to read the hints and suggestions scattered through 
the book. They are printed on gray backgrounds to make 
them stand out from the meeting proper. 

LITURGY [15 minutes) 
THE OTHER 

When we recognize someone, we normally speak to him or her— 
people we pass at work, people in the elevator, the mail man, a 
neighbor, the person who waits on us at the store, and a number 
more. Why do we speak to others? Why do human beings relate to 
each other? At times it may be easier not to go out of yourself to 



speak to another. Is there something human and natural about 
presenting ourselves to another through words? 

CHAPLAIN'S REMARKS 

The chaplain comments briefly on the Scripture and Liturgy parts 
of the meeting. 

SOCIAL INQUIRY (45 minutes) 

Families Make Neighborhoods 

In this meeting you are talking about your neighborhood, what it 
is and how you relate to the people of this neighborhood. Families 
make neighborhoods. They may be families in the usual sense of 
the word, or they may be couples whose families have grown and 
left; widows, widowers, broken families or lonely people who live 
together as a unit—a family. Families make neighborhoods and 
Christian families have a mission to this neighborhood: to go out, 
go forth to the families of their neighborhood. They have to learn 
to know their neighbor so that they can love their neighbor by 
meeting their needs. 

For this meeting you will base your Observes on past exper-
ience. After this time, you will bring to the meeting the 
Observes yoa have made between meetings. Remember, Ob-
serves are the reporting of facts. Oftentimes the "facts?' are 
the opinions of others. But the opinions of the group about 
the facts and discussion of the facts should be voiced during 
the Judge section of the meeting. 

1. How big is your neighborhood? 
2. How well do you know your neighbors? Children's names? 

Whether someone in a household is ill? Be specific. 
3. Give examples of how families have helped their neighborhoods. 

You can be very specific without giving names. 

J u d g e 

—Christ is in your neighborhood today. Is he happy with what he 
sees? 

—Probably, when you reported the Observes, everyone told about 
neighborhoods of different sizes. What did the size seem to de-
pend on? 

—What makes some families able to be a good influence? 
—What role should you as active Christians play in your neighbor-

Observe 

hood? 



Act 

After all the talk, the group decides on an action. It is this which 
makes CFM different from a discussion group. T h e action should 
be simple. It should be practical. It should grow out of the Judge. 
It should be one agreed on from among several suggestions. Now 
and then the book will offer some ideas for action. As a rule, though 
it is best for a group to work out its plan to do something to put 
the judgment into practice. After you have chosen an action, check: 
is it for others? 

Write down the Action the group agrees to do. 
As an extra action, ask all couples, if they have not already done 

so, to read carefully the introduction to this book. 

The best actions come when everyone makes a suggestion. 



PLAN YOUR NEXT MEETING 

—Decide which couple will take the next turn as host couple. 
—Agree on the time of meeting. 
—Have someone read aloud right now the beginning of the Social 

Inquiry of Meeting 2, through the Observes. Does anyone have 
ideas about other observations that would make this a good in-
quiry? 

—Do this at every meeting. Allow time for it. 
—Get a list of addresses and phone numbers of the group. Ask 

someone to make a copy for each couple. 

CHAPLAIN'S REMARKS 

Before the closing prayer the chaplain is invited to make some 
remarks on what has been said to help members see better how to 
show their love of Christ by how they care about others. 

PRAYER (see inside back cover) 

After the prayer the leader asks the chaplain to give the couples 
his blessing. 

Simple refreshments help the members to get better acquainted. Serve no 
more than coffee or soft drinks and cookies, or the like. 



MEETING 2 PRAYER (see inside front cover) 

The group should choose a secretary to make brief notes of 
the actions decided on by the group and of the place and date 
of the next meeting. However, each couple should xurite down 
in their own book the meeting place, date and action. 

SCRIPTURE (15 minutes) 
Y o u Did It to Me 

'When the Son of Man comes in his glory, escorted by all the angels, then 
he will take his seat on his throne of glory. • All the nations will be as-
sembled before him and he will separate men one from another as the 
shepherd separates sheep from goats. He will place the sheep on his right 
hand and the goats on his left. Then the king will say to those on his right 
hand, "Come, you whom my Father has blessed, take for your heritage the 
kingdom prepared for you since the foundation of the world. For I was 
hungry and you gave me food; I was thirsty and you gave me drink; I was 
a stranger and you made me welcome; naked and you clothed me, sick and 
you visited me, in prison and you came to see me." Then the virtuous will 
say to him in reply, "Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you; or 
thirsty and give you drink? When did we see you a stranger and make you 
welcome; naked and clothe you; sick or in prison and go to see you?" And 
the king will answer, " I tell you solemnly, in so far as you did this to one 
of the least of these brothers of mine, you did it to me." Next he will say 
to those on his left hand, "Go away from me, with your curse upon you, to 
the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and 
you never gave me food; I was thirsty and you never gave me anything to 
drink; I was a stranger and you never made me welcome, naked and you 
never clothed me, sick and in prison and you never visited me." Then it 
will be their turn to ask, "Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty, a 
stranger or naked, sick or in prison, and did not come to your help?" Then 
he will answer, " i tell you solemnly, in so far as you neglected to do this to 
one of the least of these, you neglected to do it to me." And they will go 
away to eternal punishment, and the virtuous to eternal life.' 

MATTHEW 25:31-46 
DISCUSSION 

— W h o are the least of our brothers today? 

— H o w do we help the least of our brothers today? 

— I n whom do we find Christ when we help people in need today? How 

much is this a part of our day-to-day thinking? 

The couples should read the Scripture passage between meet-
ings. They should think about it themselves and talk it over 
with each other. They will come to experience Christ through 
their own reflections. They ivill come to know him better by 
telling their thoughts to their spouses and to others. They will 
experience Christ more deeply by having the reflections of 
others added to their own, because each one will see different 
parts of the same story as helpful and important. 



LITURGY (15 minutes) 

SACRED WORD 

People of faith present themselves to the person, God, in words. 
Our own experience tells us that most of our prayer has been set 
patterns of words, repeated no matter what the occasion. Our non-
Catholic friends who pray out of other traditions often do not 
repeat prayer but speak their own words to God. 
—How do you account for differences in approach to prayer? 
—What value do you see in each approach? 

CHAPLAIN'S REMARKS 

REPORTS 

The leader asks the secretary to read the Action agreed on at the 
last meeting. Then he should let each member report on whether or 
not he has done the action and describe it briefly. This is the one 
part of a CFM meeting in which everyone is expected to speak in 
turn. 

SOCIAL INQUIRY (45 minutes) 

Communications in Marriage 
Friendship has a tremendous role to play in the growth of self-
knowledge and self acceptance. . . . A couple who take their friend-
ship for granted, who are too busy for each other, can become 
strangers even while living in the same house. The lack of com-
munication gives way to the haunting suspicion that he doesn't 
understand or she doesn't care. . . . 

One truly great vista of marriage is to see it as a lifetime of friend-
ship. As they (a couple) grow, they will experience more and share 
more deeply. . . . The mystery of the (whole) person is never ex-
hausted where there is reverence. 

Life without plan becomes haphazard living. Their days can 
become a series of struggles as they wobble on from crisis to crisis, 
unless they plan together. Communication is not merely a comfort; 
it is essential to common achievement. 

Together they need to discuss their economic state, their social 
and physical needs, their spiritual needs, the needs of others. 

Observe 

1. In conversation with three couples learn if they "are too busy 
for each other." 

Do they do things together, or share in mutual interests? 
Do they plan together? 
Do they really communicate, and if so, how do they accomplish 

this? 



Judge 

—Christ has shown us the value of the whole person. Why is it im-
portant that couples know one another, not be too busy for each 
other? 

—Why is it important that couples do things together? 
- D o you think that husbands and wives can rely on ordinary ways 

of communicating and planning, or are there special skills which 
they have to learn and work on? 

—How can our group help couples grow in friendship through bet-
ter communications in marriage? 

During the meeting the leader should occasionally sum, up 
what has been said. Sometimes he can ask for a volunteer to 
do this summarizing. Summing up tends to show the progress 
being made and helps to keep the discussion moving towards 
the pra< tical conclusion. 

Act 

Some ideas: 
—Invite another couple to the next meeting of your CFM group. 
—Share a cultural experience: read the same book or magazine 

article, go to a good movie or play together. 
- P i c k out a television program which revolves around a family, 

examine the roles and characteristics of husband and wife which 
the program depicts. 

If you have had a lively meeting, you should come up with an action 
independent of these hints. 

Write the ACTION agreed to at the meeting in this space: 

PLAN YOUR NEXT MEETING 

Read the first part of the Social Inquiry of Meeting 3. Are the 
Observes clear? Are they enough? Too much? 

CHAPLAIN'S REMARKS 

T h e chaplain might find it helpful to keep notes on the discussion. 

PRAYER (see inside back cover) 

BLESSING 

The leader should ask the chaplain to give his blessing to the group. 

Note: Keep your refreshments simple. 



MEETING 3 

PRAYER (see inside front cover) 

SCRIPTURE (15 minutes) 

Fol low M e 

And he was walking along by the Sea of Galilee he saw Simon and his 
brother Andrew casting a net in the lake—for they were fishermen. And 
Jesus said to them, 'Follow me and I will make you fishers of men.' And at 
once they left their nets and followed him. 

Going on a little further, he saw James son of Zebedee and his brother 
John; they too were in their boat, mending their nets. He called them at 
once and, leaving their father Zebedee in the boat with the men he employed, 
they went after him. 

MARK 1:16-20 

DISCUSSION 

—What kind of people did Christ call? 

— T h e y left their nets at once. Why so suddenly? 

— H o w does Christ call all of us? 

—Listen, so you can add to what is said. 
—Try to see what Christ's teachings and actions really mean. 
—It is seldom a good idea to spend time on the learned back-

ground of the Bible or to quote from books written on the 
Scriptures. 

LITURGY (15 minutes) 
THE PEOPLE'S WORK 

When Christians gather to worship as a community of faith-people, 
this is a liturgical event. The very word liturgy means the people's 
work: the work of the people in doing worship. People come to-
gether to do their work in recognizing their God. They do it as a 
people. They recognize each other as the other people of faith in 
the community. 
—Do people in your parish realize that the liturgy is the worship 

event which should involve them as a whole community? 
—Do people in your parish feel that the liturgy of the Eucharist is 

their joint work? 

CHAPLAIN S REMARKS 

REPORTS 

Be exact in reporting. "This is what I did" . . . "I will get my chance 
to finish this action in the next couple of weeks" . . . "I took no 
action." 



SOCIAL INQUIRY (45 minutes) 

Parents and Children Grow in Love 

The bishops in Council talked about the love between parents and 
children. "As living members of the family, children contribute in 
their own way to making their parents holy. For they will respond 
to the kindness of their parents with sentiments of gratitude, with 
love and trust." 

(The Church in the Modern World, article 48) 

They talked also about the value of each person. They spoke about 
the fact that we must not only have children but also see to their 
education, to their development as persons. These are part of re-
sponsible love. 

Observe 

1. Give concrete examples of how parents show love for their 
children: 

—How do they display affection? 
—How do they show respect for the "special-ness" of each of their 

children? 
—How do they look to the full development of each one's God-given 

gifts, each one's pow^r to become a whole person? 
—Do any express their feelings on these points? 
2. Give examples of how children show love and respect for their 

parents; for their brothers and sisters. 
3. Give examples of how children show respect for other adults; 

for other children. 

Judge 

—How does having children enable parents to love more—each 
other, their children, other people? 

—How do children learn to love in the home—their brothers and 
sisters; their parents; other people? 

—What factors seem to affect parents' ability to help their children 
grow and develop? 

Act 

—Use daily experiences to develop attitudes of sympathy and under-
standing in your children. 

—Take some action having to do with the relationship between 
children and people in authority. 

—Is there something that your group can do to help communicate 
your ideas to others? 

PLAN YOUR NEXT MEETING 

By now you will have a pattern of meeting-dates and hosts. Follow 



this pattern, marking the dates and noting at whose home the 
meeting will be held. 

Read the first part of the next meeting. Need to make assignments? 

CHAPLAIN'S REMARKS 

PRAYER 

BLESSING 

Note: T h e social par t of the meeting is important to help members 
become better acquainted. 

m m -r - » jsy 
RESPONSIBLE PARENTHOOD - - J 

"This Council realizes that certain modern conditions often keep 
couples from arranging their married lives harmoniously, and that 
they find themselves in circumstances where at least temporarily the 
size of their families should not be increased. As a result, the faithful 3 
exercise of love and the full Intimacy of their lives are hard to main-
tain. But where the intimacy of married life is broken off, it is not 
rare for its faithfulness to be imperiled and its quality of fruitfutness 
ruined. For then the upbringing of the children and the courage to 
accept new ones are both endangered." (ibid. The Church in the 
Modern World, Article 51.) 

"Parents should regard as their proper mission the task of trans-
mitting human life and educating those to whom it has been trans-
mitted. They should realize that they are thereby cooperators with 
the love of God the Creator, and are, so to speak, the interpreters 
of that love. Thus they will fulfill their task with human and Christian 
responsibility. With docile reverence toward God, they will come to 
the right decision by common counsel and effort. 

- , "They will thoughtfully take into account both their own welfare 
and that of their children, those already born and those which may 
be foreseen. For this accounting they will consult the interests of the 
family group, of temporal society, and of the Church herself. 

"The parents themselves shoufd ultimately make this judgment, 
in the sight of God. But in their manner of acting, spouses should 
be aware that they cannot proceed arbitrarily. They must always be 
governed according to a conscience dutifully conformed to the divine 
law itself, and should be submissive toward the Church's teaching 
office, which authentically interprets that law in the light of the 
gospel. That divine law reveals and protects the integral meaning of 8 
conjugal love, and impels it toward a truly human fulfillment." (The 
Church in the Modern World, Article 50.) 



MEETING 4 
PRAYER 

Are you starting on time? If not, find out if the hour is con-
venient for all. Do your meetings last more than an hour and 
a half? If they do, what is the biggest problem in sticking to a 
schedule? 

SCRIPTURE (15 minutes) 

Do This and Life Is Yours 

There was a lawyer who, to disconcert him, stood up and said to him, 
'Master, what must I do to inherit eternal life?' He said to him, 'What is 
written in the Law? What do you read there?' He replied, 'You must love 
the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your 
strength, and with all your mind, and your neighbour as yourself.' 'You have 
answered right,' said Jesus 'do this and life is yours.' 

LUKE 10:25-28 
DISCUSSION: 
— H o w do we love God? 

—What does it mean to love another as much as you love yourself? 

LITURGY (15 minutes) DOING JUSTICE 
Christian people worship weekly on the day of the Lord. We cele-
brate the paschal mystery and share in the death, burial, resurrec-
tion, and ascension of Christ in order to reaffirm in our own lives 
the presence of the Christ, the risen Lord. We celebrate the work of 
God in the life of man, working to make him just; we celebrate the 
work of man in God's kingdom, working to be just, to do justice, to 
bring justice into the world. 

T o say it another way—we may call it the Good News (the 
Gospel) being done again and again by God in our life, and the 
good news of justice being done again and again by man on earth. 

We come to celebrate all of God's justice being done here and 
now. This gives us reason to celebrate the continued presence of our 
Lord and Savior working here and now—in our lives and through 
us in the lives of others. 

—Do you see God's justice being done in the world today? 

—Who are doing the work of God's justice? 

—Is our own worship-community involved in working out God's jus-
tice? Do we have reason to celebrate? 

CHAPLAIN'S REMARKS REPORTS 



SOCIAL INQUIRY (45 minutes) 

Responsible Parents 
Vatican Council II talked about the need for couples, "by common 
counsel and effort," to come to right decisions about family size. 
Such phrases as "their own welfare and that of their children," "the 
parents themselves should ultimately make this judgment," "they 
cannot proceed arbitrarily," "consult the interests of the family 
group, of temporal society, and of the Church herself," "conjugal 
love . . . human fulfillment" tell us that we need to know what the 
teaching church is saying and what families around us are saying 
and doing about making responsible decisions on family size. 

Observe 

1. Read Articles 49, 50 and 51 of the Constitution on the Church 
in the Modern World, for a fuller view of what the Council 
said about marriage and parenthood. Someone should be as-
signed to get and circulate these paragraphs. 

2. Prior to the next meeting each couple should discuss together: 
• their ideas about the need for every person to grow and to 

develop fully 

• the personal dignity of husband and wife 
• the qualities of married love 
• and the moral values which they think should guide it. 

3. Each couple in the group talk to several other couples. T o get a 
variety of responses, perhaps you will want to make assignments, 
so that some talk to engaged couples and newly-weds; others, to 
couples with growing families; others, to older couples with 
completed families. 
a. Ask them what factors they believe should enter into a 

couple's decisions on family size. 
b. The Council document lists the welfare of the children al-

ready born as a factor to be considered. How could their well-
being be threatened? How could it be enhanced by additional 
children in the family? Ask couples for comments. 

c. Do they consider that all this discussion of family size may 
seriously lead to a lack of trust in the providence of God? 

Should you really do nil of these Observes? More? Others? 
The list of Observes is not a magic formula. Think hard, 
ahead of time, about the meeting as a whole—the way the prob* 
lem is stated, how the meeting relates to others in the book, to 
the general goals of the program, to the abilities of your own 



Judge 

—Would you say truly Christian principles were considered by the 
couples interviewed in discussing the joys and burdens of raising 
a family? 

—Did you think they sufficiently appreciated the value of children 
to their marriage and to their own personality growth? 

—Assess their views about the welfare of children as a factor in 
determining the size of a family. 

Act 

—Would a couples' workshop on "Christian Approach to Respon-
sible Parenthood" be a helpful service? 

—Promote a Cana Conference in the parish or get another couple 
to attend one with you. 

A Cana Day is a day of recollection for married couples. Many 
couples who attend Cana Days are eager to work to improve 
family life. If you do not have a Cana center in your diocese, 
you can obtain further information fromiZ. The Cana Con-
ference, 720 Worth Rush Street, Chicago, Illinois 60611, or 
from the Family Life Bureau, 1312 Massachusetts Avenue, 
N.W., Washington, D.C. ' tr g 

M l m ^ ^ ^ ^ s ^ ^ s S l ^ M ^ m ^ M ^ m S ^ m ^ ^ ^ ^ S S M m 

LOOK AHEAD. ARE YOU LOOKING FAR ENOUGH AHEAD? 

CHAPLAIN'S REMARKS 

BLESSING 
The leader should ask the Chaplain to give his blessing to the group. 

PRAYER 



CLOSING PRAYER 
Almighty and eternal God, may Your grace en-

kindle in all men love for the many unfortunate 
people whom poverty and misery reduce to a 
condition of life unworthy of human beings. 

Arouse in the hearts of those who call You 
Father, a hunger and thirst for social justice and 
for fraternal charity in deeds and in truth. Grant, 
O Lord, peace in our days, peace to souls, peace 
to families, peace to our country, peace among 
nations. Amen. 

Christian Family Movement 
1655 West Jackson Blvd. 
Chicago, Illinois 60612 

Dear Friends: 

Please enroll us as members of the Christian Family Movement. 
We enclose $3.00 for our yearly dues and $2.00 for a copy of 
"FOR HAPPIER FAMILIES—An Introduction to CFM." 

Name ; 
(Print or type) 

Add ress 

City 

Diocese. 

State or Prov 

Zip Code. 



Since its very beginning 
the CFM has dedicated itself 

through its annual programs 
to objectives which can 

be summarized in these 
words of Vatican II: 

1954 
COMMUNITY 

1955 
THE LAYMAN'S ROLE 

IN THE CHURCH 
1956 

SOCIAL HARMONY: 
RESPECTING MINORITIES 

1957 
PARISH LIFE AND EDUCATION 

1958 
FAMILY LIFE AND ECONOMICS 

1959 
POLITICAL AND 

CHRISTIAN LIFE 
1960 

INTERNATIONAL LIFE 
1961 

THE FAMILY, CENTER 
OF SOCIAL REBIRTH 

1962 
CHRISTIANITY AND 
SOCIAL PROGRESS 

1963 
THE PARISH, LEAVEN 

IN THE COMMUNITY 
1964 

ENCOUNTER IN POLITICS 
AND RACE 

1965 
INTERNATIONAL LIFE 

AND CULTURE 
1966 

FAMILIES IN A TIME 
OF CHANGE 

" . . . O f the 
many s u b j e ^ ^ f l 

arousing universal 
concern today, 

it may to helpful 
to concentrate on 

these: iftarriage and 
the family, human 

culture J life in its 
economic, social, and 

polit ical dimensions, 
the bonds between t h e ^ ^ 
family bf nations, and 
peace. O n f l i c h of tiiese 
may there shine t h » radiant 
ideals i^^c la imed by 
Chr ist . ^By these ideals 
may Chr is t ia r^ be led, and 
all mankind enlightened; 
as they seanbh for answers 
to questions of such 
c o m p l e x i w . " 

T H B C H U R C H IN T H E 
M O D E R N WORLD, 
A R T I C L E 46