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HONORIA AND MAMMON.  
Written by james Shirley Gent.  
SCENE METROPOLIS, OR NEW-TROY.  
Whereunto is added the Contention of Ajax and Ulysses, for the Armour of Achilles.  
As it was represented by young Gentlemen of quality at a private entertainment of some Persons of Honour.  
LONDON, Printed for john Crook, and are to be sold at his shop at the sign of the Ship in S. Paul's Church yard, 1659.   

TO THE CANDID READER.  
A Small part of this Subject, many years since had dropped from my pen: But looking at some opportunities upon the Argument, I thought some things more considerable might be deduced; and applying myself further, at times of recess, I felt it grow and multiply under my imagination: Nor left I it then (the matter being so pregnant in itself) till I formed it into such limbs and proportions as you now see it. Modesty after this, invited me to cover it, and to cut off many impertinences, and purge some humour, that sa●e, I confess, unhandsomely upon it.  
What is now presented, I hope will appear a genuine and unforced Moral, which though dressed in Drammatique Ornament, may not displease, in the reading, persons of ingenuity, such whose nature is not to create prejudice, where they intent a recreation. And in the confidence of that, I do not repent the superstructures I have made, my pains, nor expenses that have attended to bring it to this. It is now public to satisfy the importunity of friends, I will only add, it is like to be the last, for in my resolve, nothing of this nature shall after this, engage either my pen or invention.  
The reason why I make no particular Dedication to any Friend, is, because I aim my general respect to all, whose favours and civilities have obliged me. At this none will be offended, where none hath the precedence: And to conclude with the most serious truth, I know not any, that love me so little, whom the payment of my so mean addresses would satisfy, as to clear me upon the account of his friendship. Let this suffice at present from him, that is  
Your Servant, JAMES SHIRLEY▪   


Persons.  
Conquest a Colonel, Lovers of Lady Honoria. Alworth a Scholar, Alamode a Courtier,  
Fulbank a Citizen, Suitors to Lady Mammon. Maslin a Countryman,  
Travers a Lawyer, servant to Mammon and Honoria.  
Squanderbag.  
Phantasm, Gentleman-usher to La. Mam.  
Dash the Lawyers Clark.  
A Captain.  
A Sergeant.  
Soldiers.  
Countrymen.   

Honoria.  
Mammon.   Scene Metropolis:  

HONORIA AND MAMMON  

ACT. I.  Enter Alworth and Phantasm. Alw. 
'tIS not far off, I'll ask this Gentleman.  
Can you instruct me, sir, where the great  
Lady Aurelia Mammon lives?  Pha. 
Yes sir, I can.  Alw. 
Pray do me the civility.  Pha. 
Have you  
Affairs with her, my friend in black.  Alw. 
Have you  
Relation to the Lady, Sir?  Pha. 
She owns me  
A Gentleman-usher, with your pardon Sir,  
Are not you inclining to a Scholar?  Alw. 
I have spent time i'th' Academy.  Pha. 
The Academy?  
Another beggar,  
I did think so by your serious face, your habit  
Had almost cozened me, and your hair, they are  
Of the more Court edition, this is  
A beggar of the upper form of Learning,  
Your business with my Lady,  Alw. 
If you please  
To prepare my access—  Pha. 
'Tis to no purpose,  
My Lady keeps no Library, no food  
For booke-worms, I can assure you that,  
Learning is dangerous in our Family,  
She won't keep a Secretary for fear  
Of the infection.  Alw. 
Does she keep no fool?  Pha. 
Yes, yes, and knaves;  Alw. 
I thought so,  
In which class is your name, I beseech you?  Pha. 
We enjoy equal privileges, indeed the knave  
Makes somewhat more on's office, but my Lady  
Is not so nice, so we can bring Certificates  
That we are sound, and free from the infection  
Of book's, or can lay down our understandings,  
And part with that unnecessary stuffing  
I'th' head, (you know my meaning) or renounce  
The impious use of humane art and knowledge,  
We are in a capacity of employment;  
Perhaps you may, on these terms be admitted  
With your Philosophy, and things about you,  
To keep her horse, d'ye observe?  Alw. 
A fair preferment!  Pha. 
The fittest here for men of art, or if  
You can keep counsel and negotiate handsomely  
The amorous affair of flesh and blood;  
(There you may exercise your parts of Rhetoric.)  
How lies your learning that way? 'tis an office  
Many grave persons have submitted to,  
And found it a smooth path to court preferment,  
But she is here, I'll leave you to your fortune.  Enter Aurelia Mammon. Mam. 
With me, your business?  Alw. 
The Lady Honoria, Madam, by me humbly  
Presents her service, and this paper to  
Your Ladyship.  Mam. 
The Lady Honour? 'tis  
Some borrowing letter.  Alw. 
This is not civil.  Mam. 
I am so haunted with this mendicant  
Nobility at every ebb of fortune.  
I must be troubled with Epistles from 'em.  
What's here?— you are, a Scholar.  Alw. 
I have studied the arts,  Mam. 
Your Lady writes as much, and would commend you  
To my inployment, but I want no Chaplain.  Alw. 
If you did, I cannot flatte●, Madam.  Mam. 
I have known wiser men converted by Preferment.  Alw. 
They were things that had no Souls,  
Or use of that bright Entelecheia  
Which separates them from beasts.  Mam. 
I did expect  
Hard words, and do commend the pure discretion  
Of your most learned tribe, that think themselves  
Brave fellows, when they talk Greek to a Lady;  
Next to the Goth and Vandal, you shall carry  
The babble from Mankind, pray tell your Lady,  
Learning is out of fashion in my Family,  Alw. 
Why should you be an Enemy to Arts?  
The Lamps we wast, and watches, that consume  
Our strength in noble studies, are ill paid  
With this disdain, your smile would make us happy,  
And with your golden beam strike new day  
Through learning's universe.  Mam. 
You but lose your time,  
I know you are writing some prodigious volume  
In praise of hunger, and immortal beggary.  
This may in time advance you to a Pedant,  
To whip the Town-top's, or gelded Vicarage,  
Some forty Marks per annum, and a Chamber-naid  
Commended by your Patron.  Alw. 
You're not worth  
My anger, I should else—  Mam. 
What my sweet Satire?  Alw. 
Present your Ladyship with a glass, a true one.  
Should turn you wild to see your own deformity.  Mam. 
I pretheeraile, now for a storm—  Alw. 
I won't lose my temper on such a trifle.  Exit. Enter Fulbanke and Maslin. Mam. 
But here are two come timely, to disperse  
All cloudy thoughts, my diligent daily waiters.  Ful. 
Now Poetry be my speed! my noblest mistress.  Mam. 
What have you there, dear Mr. Fulbanke?  Ful. 
Lines, that are proved to express your beauty, Madam.  Mam. 
Bless me! turned Poet? I must tell you Servant,  
Nothing in nature is more killing to me.  Ful. 
Umh! I see my Lady Mammon is no wit.  
d'ye think I made 'em? I have an Estate, Madam.  Mam. 
I know you have fined for Alderman.  Ful. 
They were a foolish Scholars o'the Town,  
And I made my address to be confirmed  
In your opinion, they were wretched things,  
And like the starved composer. The nine Muses  
I have read, Madam, in a Learned Author,  
Were but a knot of travailing, tawny gipsies  
That lived by country canting, and old Songs,  
And picking worms out of fool's fingers, which  
Was palmistry forsooth, and for Apollo  
Whom they called Father, a poor silly Piper,  
That kept a thatched house upon Cuckold's Hill,  
Not far from Helicon, or old Bride-well,  
Where he sold switches, till his hut was burned  
One night by a tinker's nose, that lay in straw there;  
And he, for loss of this poor tenement,  
Ran mad, from whence came all the mighty stir,  
Of that, which we now call Poetic fury.  Mam. 
'Tis very likely.  Mas. 
Madam, be your leave,  
I am a countryman, what should a man lie for?  
I ken no College learning, but I have  
Been whipped for latin in my days, that have I;  
And have heard talk of the Philosopher's stone;  
Although I wear not velvet like his worship,  
My heart's embroidered with love and I  
Defy the man that thinks me insufficient  
To do, what's fitting to be done between  
You and I Madam, as the best what lack you  
Finical-fartical-citt within the walls.  Ful. 
Take heed how you provoke me.  Mas. 
I'll provoke any man living, in the way of Love.  Enter Phantasm. Mam. 
Did all the Ladies sleep well?  Pha. 
Yes and their Monkey's Madam, and have all  
Their several thanks, and services remembered  
To your Ladyship— but Madam—  Exit Mam. and Phant. Ful. 
She has left us.  
I'll find a time to make, you sensible—  Mas. 
Me sensible?  
I defy thee.  Ful. 
Be not rampant, and thank Heaven  
We are not armed.  Mas. 
I scorn it.  Ful. 
Dar'st thou meet me?  Mas. 
Yes, the next day after Simon and jude  
I dare, when all your liveries go a feasting  
By water with your galley foist and potguns,  
And Canvas Whales to Westminister▪ I am not  
Affeared of your green Robin-hoods, that fright  
With fiery club your pitiful Spectators  
That take pains to be stifled, and adore  
The Wolves and Camels of your company.  
Next whom the children ride, who innocent things,  
What with the Giants, and the Squibs and eating  
Too many sugar-plumms, take occasion to  
Perfume their Pageants, which your Senators  
Ride after in full scent.  Ful. 
Thou horrid Lump  
Of leather, course wool, ignorance and husbandry,  
Most pitifully compounded, thou that  
Hast lived so long a dunghill, till the weeds  
Had overgrown thee, and but ten yards off,  
Cozened a horse that come to graze upon thee,  
Thou miserable thing, that wert begot  
By the whole Town, thou dar'st call no man Father,  
Found in a hedge, but bred up in a stable,  
Wherewith the horse thou didst divide the bean's,  
Dung like the beast, and wert as often curried.  
Thus bred, at one and twenty thou were't able  
To write a legible Sheep's mark in t●rre,  
And read thy own capital letter, like a gallows  
In a Cow's buttock.  Mas. 
Suffer this?  Ful. 
And more:  
Fortune conspiring with thy own ill nature,  
That durst be damned for Money, made thee rich,  
And then the Country's curses fattened thee,  
Time, and thy sordid sins made thee at last  
High-Constable, and now thou hast the impudence—  Mas. 
Thou liest.  Mastin strikes Fulbank Enter Phantasm with two Swords. Pha. 
Fear not me Gentlemen, I am your friend,  
A friend to both your honours; here, be noble  
You have a just cause, and a gallant Mistress  
Persons of your quality, to fight thus  
For bloody noses, too't like Gentlemen,  
And draw blood handsomely, he that gets the victory  
Shall ha' my Lady, and a pardon, though  
It cost her half a Million, so I leave you.  
Here will I stay, and observe both their valours.  Ful. 
We are betrayed.  Obscures Mas. 
I do not like these tools.  Ful. 
It is not for my credit to be killed,  
If he have but the courage to advance,  
I am no Merchant-taylor of this World,  
And yet he looks less rampant. Sirrah Maslin—  Mas. 
I were best deliver up my cold iron, here.  Ful. 
He does approach.  Mas. 
And yet I won't. Fulbanke.  
I am of thy opinion, we are both  
Betrayed; for my own part, although I carry  
No flesh that fears a sword; yet I do not  
Affect to have devices put upon me.  Ful. 
'tis something thou hast said; this may be ● plot;  
Some third man has projected by our ruins  
To make his path smooth to my Lady Mammon;  
And thus her Squire promotes it.  Mas. 
A conspiracy!  
I read it in the rascals face, too't quotha  
Like Gentlemen● no, they sha'not laugh at me.  
And my Lady had a mind to ha' my throat cut,  
She shall excuse me.  Ful. 
To my wishes! but  
I am not satisfied,  
We can without some blood come off with honour,  
You know th'affront was mine, and though I would not  
Have my revenge writ in too deep a crimson,  
Yet something must be done, it will be public,  
And we may still be laughed at.  Mas. 
Thou sayest right,  
Things cannot well be cleared without some blood.  
I have considered, and you shall be satisfied,  Ful. 
So, I have made fine work, the Boar will fight now.  Mas. 
The credit of a wound will serve, thus then—  Ful. 
Stay, I have a device will bring us both off.  
Why may not we consent to give each other  
A careless wound in the leg, or arm, and so  
March off with honour?  Mas. 
This knack was in my very thoughts, 'tis Excellent.  Ful. 
But since I named it first, 'tis my invention,  
And I will strike the first blow,  Mas. 
hang't, I pass not,  
But gently then, a scratch i'th' arm, or hands  
Enough, a small thing does it, gently, oh!  
Thou hast cut of my Sword hand, this is fowl play,  
I cannot hold my tool now.  Ful. 
But stoop to reach it,  
I'll cut thy head off, Ith' field we must  
Use all advantages. This weapon's mine too.  
Farewell, and say I have used thee honourably.  Enter Phantasm. Pha. 
Ha. ha. ha. are you hurt Sir?  
I see the Alderman has outwitted you.  
Let me see, ha? a scratch, a very scratch;  
Bear up, there may be ways to your revenge,  
Leave not your applications to my Lady.  
He counsels this, that will assist you— but  
I ever thought your habit much beneath  
The person that should court so great a Lady.  
It smells too much o'th' team, I know you're rich.  
Aire, air your gold, and make your body clinkant,  
The rest commit to fate, and me, consult  
Your Tailor.  Mas. 
And my Chirurgeon; Sir I thank you.  Pha. 
You do not know, how I am contriving for you.  Mas. 
That very word has cured me. I'll about it.  Exit. Pha. 
So, when there's no other mischief to be done,  
Let them go on, and love my Lady Mammon;  
I'll assist one, in hope the tother may  
Go hang himself, and then it will be hard  
To judge, which of the two has the better fortune.  Exit. Enter Honoria between Alamode and Colonel. Ala. 
Bless me but with one smile, if you did know  
With what devotion my Soul looks on you,  
How next to my Religion I have placed,  
(If not above it,) your diviner beauty—  Hon. 
Your name is Alamode, a Courtier.  Aba. 
'Tis sweetened by Honoria's breath,  Col. 
I have  
No stock of pefumed words to court you, Madam,  
Can you affect a man? A soldier?  
When I have marched upto a breach, which looked  
Like Hell with all his sulphurous flames about it;  
My heart was fixed on honour, and I took  
From gaping wounds the fleeting Souls about me  
Into my own, and fought with all their spiritis;  
The mangled bodies that I trod upon,  
(For now the dead had buried all the Earth)  
Gave me addition to Heaven where, in,  
My strong imagination I saw  
Thee from thy Chariot dropping down a Garland.  Hon. 
You are a Colonel.  Col. 
I profess a soldier Madam.  Hon. 
It appears a bold one; art thou come Alworth.  Enter Alworth. 
What said the Lady Mammon?  Ala. 
One that has some relation to her person.  
They call him Alworth, and I have observed  
She looks on him with favour above a Servant,  
He has not the impudence to court his Lady  Hon. 
So peremptory? what a strange monster wealth is?  
I have but made a trial of her friendship,  
And had no meaning thou shouldst leave me Alworth,  
Depend upon my care, I know your parts;  
And shall not be forgetful of their merit.  
But thou art come most seasonable to relieve me.  Ala. 
I do not like their whispering.  Alw. 
If you please, Madam, to absent yourself,  
Leave me to the excuse.  Hon. 
Do so, dear Alworth.  Alw. 
I am happy when you command me service.  Hon. 
Be confident, I keep a silent register of all,  
And shall reward them.  Alw, 
Your own virtues guide you.  Exit Hon. Col. 
My Lady's gone.  Alw. 
But has commanded me to let you know  
Her resolution, she hath found you both  
Ambitious of honour, both deserving,  
And such an equal furniture of merit,  
She has no art to reconcile her thoughts  
Into one fortunate choice.  Ala. 
'Tis very strange.  Alw. 
The Gordian, which great Alexander could not  
By subtlety dissolve, his sword untwisted;  
I use her own words, Gentlemen, you may  
Infer, that you must either quit your courtship,  
Or by yourselves agree, who best deserves her,  
And dare do most to merit such a mistress.  Ala. 
How, best deserves her?  Col. 
And dare do most,  Alw. 
I should interpret this to fight for Honour.  
But you can best expound, and so I leave you.  Exit. Col. Col. 
What says my perfumed Alamode to this?  
Will not a sword quite spoil your satin Doublet,  
And let in too much air? your lips and language  
Bathed in the oil of Gessamine will not carry her,  
You have worn a sword thus long, to show the hint,  
Now let the blade appear.  Ala. 
It shall. I have yet  
No ague, I can look upon your buff,  
And punto beard, yet call for no strong-water,  
I am no Tavern gull, that want protection,  
Whom you with oaths do mortify and swear  
Into the payment of your ten pound surfeits;  
Upon whose credit you wear belt and feather,  
Top and Top-gallant. Go to your Landab—  
i'th' new Brothel, she's a handsome leverett,  
If she deny free quarter, tear her trinkets,  
Make Cu●●ice of the Matron, yet be friends  
Before the Constable come in, and run  
O'th' ticket for the dear disease.  Col. 
Go on sir.  
I will have patience three minutes longer,  
To hear thy scurrile wit, and then correct it.  Ala. 
Answer but one cool question, if Honoria  
Should possibly descend to think well of thee,  
And by some philter should be brought to love thee.  
What Jointure could we make, what's the per annum?  Col. 
Have you done yet?  Ala. 
'Tis not impossible,  
You may have a Catalogue of Town's and Leaguers  
The Names of Bridges broken down, your nose  
In time may keep them company in Landscape:  
You will tell of Bulwarks, Barricado, Fort's.  
Of outworks, half moons, spurs, and parapets  
Of turnepikes, flankers, Cats and Counter-scarves,  
These things will hardly pawn with Jew or Christian;  
But I'll come closer to you, you may have  
In ready wounds some twenty, I'll admit,  
And in diseases can assure her forty;  
This won't do, she cannot eat a knapsack,  
Or carry baggage, lie in your foul hutt,  
And roast the pullen, for whose precious theft,  
You and the gibbet fear to be acquainted.  
If you return into your wholesome Country,  
Upon your honourable wooden legs,  
The houses of Correction have but thinn  
Accommodations, nor the Hospitals.  Col. 
It does appear by all this impudence,  
And little wit pilfer'd, and put together,  
You do not know me.  Ala. 
Cry your mercy, Sir.  
You are a great Field-officer, are past  
These petty things, but if these times preserve  
Their smooth complexion, it won't be  
Ten hundred thousand pistols to a ●●iver,  
But you may run this gantlope once again.  Col. 
You imagine you have stung me now, and that  
I think myself concerned in this keen character?  
I tell thee (wretched thing,) thou dost not reach  
A Soldier, 'tis a name, three Heavens above  
Thy Soul to understand, and 'twere a sin  
Would lessen our own worth, to make thee know it.  
You are a Courtier.  Ala. 
Very good.  Col. 
Nay rather.  
A very impious one, you shall confess it,  
Or I will cut your throat, this is no canting.  Ala. 
Very fine.  Col. 
Nay we know you are a fine Gentleman,  
A Taffata-sattin-plush-embroydered-  
Lac'd-scarlet-tissue-cloath-a-bodkin devil;  
Pride is thy meat and drink, thy Library,  
And thy Religion, thy new clothes only  
Bring thee to Church, where thou dost muster, all  
The fashions, and the trinkets, to the last  
New button, upon which thy conscience sits,  
And as the devil guides it, dost condemn,  
Or save the people, that done, not the window's  
Escape thee, for thou wilt quarrel with the pictures,  
And find fault with the Apostles, for not having  
A better Tailor, these Sir are your virtues,  
Your high, and holiday devotions.  
What moral vices follow in the week,  
Is best known to the devil, your close friend,  
That keeps the Catalogue, yet one touch of them;  
Thy lust has no bounds, when thy blood's a fire,  
Thou leapest all like a Satire, without difference  
Of kindred, or acquaintance; and were those  
But summoned, whom thy body hath infected,  
They would stuff an Hospital, and outstink the Pest-house.  Ala. 
And yet I walk upon these poor supporters.  Col. 
How long the Chirurgeon knows.  Ala. 
These all my faults?  Col. 
No, those are but thy Peccadillioes,  
Thy malice is behind, thou wilt not take a bribe  
To undo a Nation, sell thy Country men  
To as many persecutions, as the devil  
Or Dutch men had invented at Amboyna;  
With all this stock of villainy, thou hast  
An impudence—  Ala. 
I'll hear no more,  Col. 
A little I'll entreat you, all is but  
A preface to your bearing, which must follow,  
Your tribe will bear it.  Ala. 
Then have at you Sir.  They make a Pass. Col. 
You're very nimble Courtier.  Ala. 
As you see.  Col. 
Good Mounsieur Quicksilver,  
You may be fixed.  Ala. 
And your arrear's be paid.  Another Pass, Alamode down and disarmed. Col. 
What think you now?  Ala. 
It is your fortune Sir.  Col. 
You're at my mercy, ask your life?  Ala. 
I scorn it.  Col. 
I'll kill you then.  Ala. 
A boy may do as much  
At this advantage.  Col. 
Will you not ask your life?  Ala. 
No 'tis not worth it.  Col. 
an't be not worth your ask, 'tis not Worth  
My taking at this posture, there's your weapon,  
Rise, use it again.  Ala. 
It shall be thus to render it.  
Though I was not so base to beg my life,  
Yet since you have given it me, I scorn to employ it  
Against one that was the master on't,  Col. 
This is gallantry.  Ala. 
You taught it first.  Col. 
In spite of all the Widows in the World  
We will be friends.  Ala. 
I meet it Colonel.  Col. 
And for the Lady Mammon—  Ala. 
we'll take our chance.  Col. 
A match, now let us to th' Tavern.  Exeunt.  

ACT. II.  Enter Fulbanke and Phantasm. Pha. 
I Think I have brought your business we about, Sir.  Ful. 
Thou hast obliged me everlastingly:  
Nay nay, be covered, thou art my best friend.  Pha. 
It was but Justice to advance your merit  
With all the Rhetoric I had, for where  
In prudence, could my Lady Mammon place  
Herself with more advantage to her fame?  
A widow of a thousand pound per annum Jointu●  
With some few present bags of musty Gold,  
Old Plate, and hungry householdstuff would serve  
The Country well enough.  Ful. 
Excellent Phantasm  Pha. 
Where the report of building a Free-school  
And now and then an almehouse for old women,  
With five teeth and a half among sixteen,  
Would make a mighty noise, and the poor hinds  
Wonder, there's so much money left in nature.  
The City is her only sphere of glory.  Ful. 
Right, very right.  Pha. 
Here My Lady Mammon.  
(Yours now as things are ordered)  Ful. 
Good.  Pha. 
May have high and noble ways to employ her treasures.  
Do things above the vulgar admiration,  
Surround the City with a wall of Silver,  
Transmute dull Leaden-hall to Gold, rebuild  
The great Cathedral of St. Paul's with Porphyry  
And clap so bright a spire upon't, shall make  
The Seaman afar off wonder what new  
And never setting star, Heaven hath created  
To make the day eternal in this Island.  Ful. 
My own Phantasm.  Pha. 
There is no end, Sir, of herwealth, if you  
Have but the patience to spend, you may  
Outdo the Roman Luxuries.  Ful. 
I'll give thee my Gold-chain.  Pha. 
O'h no, it may do you better service, Sir,  
'Bout your own neck hereafter; for all this  
Infinite Treasure that she brings you, Sir,  
What Jointure do you make her?  
You are mortal.  Ful. 
I ha' thought of that,  
I will secure my whole Estate upon her?  
Beside her own, I have no kindred, that  
I care for, they are poor, and as my pride,  
While I am living, will not look upon 'em,  
At death, it will be wisdom to forget them.  Pha. 
It would endear my Lady much, if you  
Surprise her with this act, before she think on't.  
I would have you do things gallantly—  Ful. 
You shall  
Give the direction to my Counsel;  Pha. 
His name.  Ful. 
A very honest able eminent person,  
One Mr. Traverse, see it done yourself.  Phan. 
My Lady will take it well, without all do bt, Sir.  Ful. 
But shall I engage your trouble—  Pha. 
'Tis an honour;  
I'll give him order to dispatch all presently.  
He is a very honest man you say.  Ful. 
He's right, I know him intus & in Cute.  Pha. 
My Lady, Sir, leave things to me.  Enter Mammon. Ful. 
My most divine Aurelea!  Mam. 
Dear Mr. Fulbanke,  
I have no happiness but in your presence,  
When shall the work be perfect?  Ful. 
I was considering,  
It would become the glory of my Bride,  
To have some state, and triumph at our marriage,  
I know the City will expect we should  
Accept some entertainment, perhaps Pageants,  
And speeches to congratulate our Nuptial.  Mam. 
'Twill please me much.  Pha. 
There may be prejudice in these delaye's,  Ful. 
Oh Sir, the state is all; what thinks your Ladyship?  
We will have tilting too, and feats of Chivalry  
At Court where I'll defend my Aurelia Princess,  
In the guilt armour that I mustered in,  
And the rich saddle of my own perfuming,  
I'll have my squires, my plumes, and my devices,  
And with my lance encounter the whole mirror  
Of Knighthood, and compel the foreign Princes  
To hang up all the Tables of their Mistresses  
As Trophies to my most victorious Mammon.  Pha. 
Without some cure he will be mad immediately.  Enter Alamode, reading a Letter, a Servant waits. Ala. 
Present my humblest service to Honoria,  
Say I am all obedience to her commands,  
Were I in Heaven, this invitation  
Would have the power to draw me thence, I kiss  
Her fairest hand, this for your favour,  gives him money. 
Mr. Fulbanke,  Ful. 
Please you to know my Lady Sir?  Ala. 
If I mistake not the Lady Aurelia;  
Widow to the late high Treasurer, Sir  
Omnipotent Mammon.  Salutes her? 
But are you Master of this rich Peru?  Ful. 
She will please to own me, ha?  Mam. 
It is but Justice.  Ala. 
A thousand streams of joy flow in your bosoms,  
I'll take some fortunate hour to visit you,  
And with an humble lip print my devotions  
On your white hand.  Mam. 
You'll do me an honour sir.  Ala. 
Some high affairs compel this rude departure,  
But you have mercy to excuse your servant.  Exit. Ful. 
What heaps of words some men have got together  
To signify nothing?  Pha. 
How do you like this Gentleman?  Ful. 
These Courtiers are another sort of flesh-flies,  
That haunt our City dames, but we must wink,  
Or lose our Chatter?  Pha. 
Bless the Body Politic.  Enter Maslin in rich clothes, but Antic. Mas. 
By your leave Gentlemen.  Ful. 
What Pageant's this?  Mas. 
Where d'ye think I have been, Madam?  Mas. 
At the Brokers.  Mas. 
At the Exchange by these silk-stockings,  
Mr. Usher— a word to the wise,  
If they will fit your rolling pin, they're paid for;  
Perhaps the wages you receive in your  
Relation to my Lady, won't find you  
Convenient vanities. Now I'm for you Madam.  Mam. 
In good time.  Mas. 
I wanted but your hand,  
I could ha' fitted you with gloves, but here are  
Some trifles for the finger, you must wear  
This Diamond, and this Ruby,  Mam. 
d'ye understand  
What you do sir?  Mas. 
And here's a casting Net of Pearl.  Mam. 
A Carcanet? these will deserve—  Mas. 
Tell not me of desert, I hate it perfectly,  
Hang toys and yellow rubbish that paid for 'em,  
How d'ye like my clothes?  Ful. 
Sir I am concerned to thank you for these favours.  Mas. 
You? prithee away, I ha' nothing to say to thee?  Ful. 
We have no other gratitude sweetheart,  
But to invite him to our wedding.  Mas. 
Wedding? Phantasm.  Pha. 
And you had come but half an hour sooner,  
This very shape had done't.  Mas. 
Do not, do not make me mad too soon.  Ful. 
You have been very bountiful, and we pray  
Your noble presence at our Festival,  
Which we have deferred to be attended with  
Some Triumph, such as may become the City,  
And my dear Lady's honour, is't not so,  
My America? look how the oyster gapes.  
Leave him to chew his Country cud, come Madam.  Exeunt. Pha. 
Sir I confess.—  Mas. 
And be hanged, I am undone, and I could cry now.  Pha. 
Sir,  
You have been at a great charge to go without her,  
Such rings, and Carcanet, beside the cost  
Of this fine habit? for your bounty, Sir,  
Bestowed on me, the unworthiest of your Servants,  
I have a gratitude, if you please to accept it.  Mas. 
What is't? a halter or a knife to cute me,  
Or a comfortable poison?  Pha. 
'Tis the first  
You named, a most convenient, neatly twisted  
Halter, for I do see your inclinations,  
And shall commend your fortidude, beside  
'Twill show a brave contempt upon their scorns.  
And who knows, how the example, Sir, may spread  
To cure some other mad men that love widows.  
You have my judgement and the cord for nothing,  
Lose not the nick of the next beam you come at,  
No way like this to be High-Constable.  Mas. 
Here, take my clothes; I will be mad, and hang  
Myself immediately;— and yet I will consider,  
Till the air be a little warmer; when I have  
Cut Fulbanks throat, 'tis but a hanging afterwards.  
'Tis good to be malicious, and wise;  
Some notable revenge would be worth all  
My cost, and then a sico for the Devil.  Exit. Enter Alworth and Alamode, Alw. 
Please you to have a little patience  
I shall acquaint my Lady that you're come, Sir.  Ala. 
Before you go, dear Sir, I know your prudence  
And near employment with my Lady, has  
Endeared you to part ache some of her Counsels;  
You shall oblige a very humble Servant,  
To let me know how she affects, you reach  
My meaning, by what motive am I sent for?  Alw. 
My Lady keeps the key of her own Cabinet,  
But if you'll have my Judgement on the scheme,  
I think my Lady will this day determine  
Her choice, I incline the rather to this Judgement,  
Because the Colonel is sent for too.  
My attendance is expected, Sir, your pardon.  Ala. 
Ha music.  A song within praise of a Courtier. 
I like this well  Enter Colonel and Alworth. Alw. 
My Lady will appear presently,  
I'll give her knowledge, if you please.  Col. 
Your favour, Sir,  
You are learned beyond books, what's your opinion  
Of my Lady, in relation to things at present?  
What do you think of me?  Alw. 
My thoughts are much  
Too narrow to conclude your worth, which left  
An object for Divine Honoria's wisdom,  
Must only take from her, a worthy character  
And just reward.  A song in praise of a Soldier. Col. 
I like this preface.  Ala. 
My noble Colonel, thy Servant.  Enter Honoria attended, a Table set forth, with a Cabinet upon it. Hon. 
Excuse the trouble that I give you Gentlemen,  
You're welcome, and thus knit into a friendship,  
Your persons have more grace, and shine upon 'em.  
Some chairs, pray sit. I see you both preserve  
Your fair respects to honour, and I have  
After some pause, and serious dispute  
Within myself, collected now at last,  
Upon whose person to repose myself,  
My fortune, and my same, and since but one  
(Where many may deserve) can wear the Garland  
The loser must content himself with his fate,  
And wait a kinder providence.  Col. 
'Tis but Justice.  She takes a wreath of Bays from the Cabinet. Hon. 
This wreath of bays, emblem of victory,  
Must crown his head to whom I fall a Conquest,  
Forgive the Ceremony.  Col. 
Oh 'tis very pleasing,  Ala. 
I like it well, Madam, and commend your fancy.  Hon. 
You, Sir, were bred up in the School of honour,  
The Court, this may not unbecome your Temples,  
Wise Courtiers are the Jewels of a Crown,  
The Columns and the ornaments of state,  
Fitted with parts; and piety to act:  
They serve the Power for Justice, not themselves;  
Their Faith the Cabinet, in which is laid  
The Prince's safety, and the Nations peace,  
The Oracles, and the mysteries of Empire;  
Men borne above the fordid guilt of avarice,  
Free as the mountain air, and calm as mercy.  
Born without Eyes, when the poor man complains  
Against the great oppressor, without hands,  
To take the bloody price of man's undoing,  
But keeping at each sense a Court of Guard,  
Draws fear from Love, and teaches good by example.  She puts the Wreath upon the Colonel. Ala. 
Divine Honoria.  Hon. 
You must give me leave,  
To try, how it becomes his brow; me thinks  
With the same grace, in dwells upon his head,  
Does he not look like mighty julius now,  
When he returned triumphant from the Gauls,  
Or bringing home the wealthy spoils of Egypt,  
Pontus, and Africa▪ allow him but  
The same commands, and men to fight, why may not  
His Valour equal what is famed in story,  
Achieved by the great souls of Rome, and Carthage?  
A soldier merits first to be called man,  
By whom not only Courts but Kingdoms flourish,  
Unto whose several offices, the World  
Owes all the great and glorious names of honour.  
How would the age grow rumly, and the soul  
Of Commonwealth's corrupt with ease, and surfeits,  
Should not the sword call 'em to exercise,  
And sweat out their unmanly Luxuries,  
By acting things worth envy, even of Princes.  
The honour of the Gown without his sword,  
Will run itself into contempt, and Laws  
Are not good made, but while the sword secures 'em.  
The Court must wear no silk, nor the proud City  
Make the Sea groan with burden of her wealth,  
Did not the active soldier, with expense  
Of his dear blood, expose himself abroad,  
Their convoy, and security at home.  Col. 
I am transported.  Hon. 
Give me the same favour  
To let me look a little on this Chaplet,  
To which I have annexed myself a Label.  
Me thinks the Trifle looks, as it had lost  
Some Verdure since I took it from your heads,  
The Courtier, and the Soldier both inviting  
In such a high degree of merit, hinders  
The progress I should make, but pardon me,  
I shall soon quit the Labarynth.  Col. 
What's the meaning?  Hon. 
I would you were not two, or that one had  
Less of desert, when you are both in balance,  
Have you no art, Gentlemen, to contract  
Yourselves into one person?  Ala. 
'Tis not possible.  Hon. 
Think you so? it is worth the experiment,  
Come hither Alworth.  Alw. 
Madam.  Hon. 
Nay come nearer,  
This is a Scholar, Gentlemen, and the cloud  
He wears, removed, for he's no more a Servant,  
May bring him into a civil competition:  
Me thinks it fits him, your opinion?  Col. 
We are in a fair way to be ridiculous, what think you?  
Chiaused by a Scholar?  Ala. 
Are you in earnest Madam?  Hon. 
I repent not  
The placing of it there, in him do meet  
The Courtier and the Soldier, at lest  
He's not without the best capacity  
Of both your worths, when they have brightest lustre.  Ala. 
There is no remedy.  
Would I had Mammon.  Hon. 
Gentlemen stay, & hear the Scholars character.  Col. 
No thank you Madam, we have heard too much,  
Fortune has given you Laurel, and us willow.  
May your wreath flourish, Sir?  Exeunt. Ala. 
Soul of my muse! what active unknown fire  
Already doth thy Delphic wreath inspire?  
O'th' sudden how my faculties swell high,  
And I am all a powerful Prophecy.  
Sleep ye dull Caesars, Rome will boast in vain  
Your glorious Triumphs, one is in my brain  
Great, as all theirs, and circled with thy bays,  
My thoughts take Empire o'er all Land, and Seas.  
Proof against all the Planets, and the stroke  
Of Thunder, I rise up Augustus' Oak,  
Within my guard of Laurel, and made free  
From age, look fresh still, as my Daphnean tree:  
My fancy's narrow yet, till I create  
For thee another World, and in a state  
As free as innocence, shame all Poet's wit,  
To climb no higher than Elysium yet;  
Where the pale Lovers meet, and teach the groves  
To sigh, and sing bold legends of their Loves.  
We will have other flights, and taste such things  
Are only fit for sainted Queens and Kings.  
All that was Earth falls of, my spirits free,  
I have nothing left now, but my Soul and thee.  Honoria takes off the Wreath. Hon. 
What means this Ecstasy? this was not meant,  
Unless you use my favours with less insolence,  
I can repent, and frown 'em back to nothing.  
Have you forgot your distance? can a smile  
And this green trifle forfeit your discretion,  
Or make me less, than when you were my Servant  
I look you should be humble still,  Alw. 
Good Heaven!  
What unexpected, most prodigious cloud,  
With his black wings, hath in a minute veiled  
The brightest day, that ever smiled upon me?  
Did not you place it here?  Hon. 
It is confessed,  
As an encouragement to your virtue, Sir,  
No Conquest of Honoria, yet you triumph,  
And make me blush as I had courted you.  Al. 
O do not charge my thoughts with such a stain,  
This might deserve your anger, and vouchsafe me  
The boldness to say Madam, if you punish  
My hasty application of your favours,  
You gave me the encouragement to be guilty.  
It is a tyranny to cherish Servants,  
And punish their obedience.  Hon. 
But when flattered by  
Pride, which darks the soul, you challenge  
And measure the reward by your own fancy,  
You lose the noblest recompense of service,  
And merit but the hire of common duties;  
'Tis possible, that Gold may satisfy  
My debt to your employment.  Alw. 
Till this minute  
I was not lost, but having heard this, Madam,  
You must do something like a miracle  
To save me now;— I dare contemn your Gold,  
And am compelled to ask your Justice, what  
Action since I had reference to honour,  
Looked with a mercenary stain upon it?  
Gold is a pay for souls of dark complexion.  
I served you for yourself, and since I'm thought  
Beneath the merit of your smile, I'll make  
Myself above the price of sordid contracts,  
For I can with as much ease despise your wealth,  
As I can shift the air, I take my leave,  
And can pray for you in a Wilderness.  Ho. 
Come back, this minute every cloud is vanished  
That did present displeasing forms: I find  
Thy soul is pure, forgive this Trial, thou hast  
Deserved me best.  Alw. 
I dare not understand you now.  Hon. 
The language is not hard.  Alw. 
I want a name, to call this blessing by,  
Then I may kiss your hand, and may I not,  
Madam approach your lip, and be forgiven?  
Now I begin to doubt.  Hon. 
My Faith?  Alw. 
That I am not awake, or if I be  
That I am short-lived, and must soon dissolve  
Under this storm of happiness; ha? 'tis come  
And I have lost my courage o' the sudden.  faints. 
Your pardon Madam, something gathers here  
That would surprise my heart. I am ashamed on't.  Enter Ser. Hon. 
Who waits, contribute your best help to his  
Support, convey him gently to his chamber,  
Run for Physicians, thy good genius guard thee.  Alw. 
I am not Worth your fears.  Hon. 
And worth my love?  Alw. 
That very word should cure me,  Hon. 
I have been  
Too much, I fear unkind, to both our dangers.  Exeunt.  

ACT III.  Enter Traverse and his Clerk. Tra. 
Wait at the door, my Clients are so numerous  
And pressing with their suits, they almost stifle me.  
Let me enjoy the air of my own Chamber;  
I think I have lost some lungs in the last cause.  
Let me indulge a little to repair 'em,  
A glass of the Greek wine, Th' Italian Merchant  
Presented me, and let the Term go on,  
I'll drive the Law at leisure, and o'er take it.  Clarke fills Wine into the glass. 
So so, this looks sprightly,  
Be careful of this Treasure, 'tis my blood,  
Waste not one drop, upon thy life I charge thee.  Dash drinks from the bottle. Das. 
Waste quothe?  
You shall not prove a waist, I'll warrant you.  Tra. 
So, so, remove.  Das. 
Sir your Idolaters, the Writs are come.  Enter Writs. Tra. 
The weather's hot, let no more spirits enter,  
Now like the sovereign Bee, methinks I sit  
●n my prodigious hive, surveying all  
by winged, industrious people, bringing honey,  
and making wax more precious than▪ a trade  
to both the Indies. My good Emissaries,  
and faithful spirits of the Law, descend  
to your infernal shades, until I call you,  Exeunt Writs. Enter Dash. Das. 
A Gentleman desires to speak with you Sir,  
From the Lady Mammon.  Tra. 
Admit him.  Enter Phantasm. Das. 
What a fine thing this Term is?  
and what an ungodly time, the long Vacation?  Pha. 
Sir, I'll not hold you long, I know you have business,  
there have passed some overtures of love and marriage,  
between your City Client, Mr. Fulbank,  
and the Mistress that I serve, the Lady Mammon.  
and you should draw a Deed to settle on her  
his whole Estate, if she survive, as Jointure—  Tra. 
I understand you Sir.  Pha. 
I am glad you do, this Sir is his desire,  
and to have all dispatched with expedition.  Tra. 
Very well.  Pha. 
But the reason of my coming is  
To desire you sir, to let all this  
Alone, there is another thing, that will  
Concern you more materially.  Tra. 
Your meaning?  Pha. 
You are not married.  Tra. 
I enjoy a freedom.  Pha. 
My Lady Mammon has a vast Estate,  
And is a widow, you do understand?  Tra. 
Her name is precicus to the World.  Pha. 
The World's an ass, you look like wiseman,  
You have a good face, and a handsome person  
Under a Gown, you have a good Estate too;  
I am a Servant, that have credit with her,  
By my relation; and I have no mind,  
The City Mule, your Client, should break  
His back with burden of his gold; in short,  
I wish you well, and if you have the confidence  
To make a motion for yourself, this high  
And mighty widow, may be yours; I'm plain.  Tra. 
Say you so?  Pha. 
I'll bring her to you, and prepare her too,  
Have I been tedious sir,  Tra. 
My better Angel!  Pha. 
Legions attend my Lady, trouble not  
Your head why all this kindness from a stranger.  
I had a revelation to do thus;  
Have a strong faith, and think upon't, your Servant.  
If within half an hour she visit you,  
Think it no dream, and thank me afterwards,  
Now leave your wonder, and be wise.  Tra. 
Can this be true? 'tis not impossible.  
This is a pretty vision would I had her.  
If she appear I may believe, and prosper.  Enter Maslin. Das. 
The tide is coming in,  
Mr. Maslin the High-Constable, a good man  
And full of causes.  Tra. 
What intrusion's this?  Mas. 
I have given a sop to Cerberus your doorkeeper.  Tra. 
O' Mr. Maslin you are become a stranger.  Mass, 
'Tis not for want of love to be at Law.  
Your worship knows, I am apt to trouble you,  
And the whole County where I live.  Tra. 
Your business?  Mas. 
Sir, it is extraordinary, and I desire  
Beside your learned worship's fees, to pay  
For expedition.  Tra. 
You speak reason.  Mas. 
I do abound in reason, look you Sir  Shows Gold 
'Tis all of this complexion; here's a piece  
For every day till the next Term begin,  
And two for every day it lasts.  Tra. 
Have a care of your health, good Sir;  Mass, 
And you of your spectacles.  Tar. 
What must I do for this?  Mas. 
Do? you must undo  
A friend of mine.  Tra. 
A Friend?  Mas. 
We are all friends in Law, Sir,  
Never did man suffer so fast an injury,  
And therefore take him to your legal malice▪  Tra. 
Has he killed your Father?  Mas. 
Worse, worse:  Tra. 
Made a whore of your sister?  Mas. 
Worse than that:  Tra. 
Ravished your wife?  Mas. 
Worse than all that, and yet this comes the nearest,  
Has cheated me of my wench; a widow Sir  
That has more money than all your profession  
Has got, since the dissolution of the Abbeys.  
In short, this is the Case, Fulbanke, the City  
Gulf has swallowed my Lady Aurelia Mammon.  Tra. 
O Cannibal!  Mas. 
Devoured my widow, wife  
That should ha' been, this man I hate, this man  
Must be undone, and there's part of the money.  Tra. 
The Lady Aurelia Mammon?  Mas. 
That very Polecat; but I must tell you Sir,  
They are not married yet, if you have now  
A dainty Devil to forbid the banes—  Tra. 
Although this be a case, more pertinent  
To the Court Ecclesiastical, yet,  
Let me consult my Lawgiver.  Turns his Books. Mas. 
Sir, so I may  
Be revenged, I stand not much upon't,  
Who has this Mammon, let the Devil take her,  
Or your worship take her, 'tis all one to me.  Tra. 
Hum! I shall stretch a point of Law for you.  
You shall have your desire, I do expect  
Her presence instantly,  Mas. 
Is that a conjuring book, expect her instantly?  
Now I'll pronounce you master of your wishes,  
For you shall have—  Mas. 
The widow?  Tra. 
What is sweeter than the widow,  
You Sir, shall have revenge, and Mr. Maslin  
To vex him more, d'ye observe I will have the widow, Myself.  Mas. 
You will, and what shall I have?  Tra. 
Sir, you shall have revenge, revenge, the joy  
Of flesh and blood, life and delight of nature,  
The poor man's Luxury, and the rich man's bath,  
Above all wealth or widows Sir. Mr. Maslin,  
I'll tame his blood, and his Estate by Law,  
While you shall crack your spleen with mirth and  
laughter,  
And wonder at my subtle arts to vex him.  Mas. 
All this is reason.  Tra. 
This shall be done by Law for the High-Constable.  Enter Mammon and Phantasm. Mas. 
The Lady's come; this Gentleman  
Has studied the black art.  Tra. 
Do you withdraw, and leave me opportunity  
To wind the widow up.  Mas. 
Behind the Hangings;  He obscures. Phantasm Exit. Tra. 
Vouchsafe your Servant touch your hand, your lip  
Is an ambition more becoming Princes:  Mam. 
I am not proud, where fair salutes invite me.  
I come to give you a little trouble, Sir.  Tra. 
Madam command me, to the extent of all  
My faculties.  Mas. 
His faculties? that will carry her,  
She is a glittering fairye, but he'll conjure her.  
Stay if he takes this prize, what shall have  
For all my expenses! that's considerable;  
Oh, I shall have revenge he says; the widow  
Were much the better▪ but we must be ruled  
By our learned Counsel.  Mam. 
You have order from  
A Gentleman of the City, Mr. Fulbank,  
To draw up writings, sir—  Tra. 
A Jointure Madam.  
But I received a Countermand.  Mam. 
From whom?  Tra. 
From providence that would not suffer such  
An excellent Lady to be lost, and thrown  
Among the City rubbish.  Mam, 
Do you know Mr. Fulbanke Sir?  Tra. 
As much, as I do wonder at his impudence,  
And saucy ambition with his mean deserts  
To look at such a blessing; your fortunes  
Are worth your preservation, and a man  
Whose art, and serious knowledge in the World  
May fence it in from a rapine, and that greater  
Enemy to an Estate, profusion.  
Excuse my plainess Madam.  Mam. 
'Tis a Truth.  Tra. 
Can you vouchsafe your smile upon a Servant,  
To whose faith and care you safely may commit  
A Treasure of more value than the World,  
Yourself; in me behold him Madam, one  
That would devote his soul a Sacrifice  
To be for ever burning in those beams,  
There is no Law, but in your breast, your lips,  
Preserve the Nations Oracle.  Mam. 
This Language  
Doth taste too much of Poetry, take heed, Sir.  Tra. 
If this dislike you Madam, I can court you  
In a more legal way, and in the name  
Of Love and Law arrest you, thus  Embraces her. Mam. 
Arrest me?  Tra. 
And hold you fast imprisoned in my arms,  
Without or bail or mainprize.  Mam. 
This does well.  Tra. 
I can do better yet, and put in such  
A declaration, Madam, as shall startle  
Your merriest blood  Mam. 
I may put in my answer.  Tra. 
Then comes my replication, to which  
You may rejoin, Currat Lex. shall we?  
Join issue presently?  Mam. 
He'll have her se defendend●.  Enter Phantasm and Fulbanke. Pha. 
What do you think of this, Sir?  Full▪ 
They are very familiar.  Mas. 
'Tis he, the very he, come as my heart  
Could wish to his vexation.  Pha. 
Is this the honest Gentleman  
You trusted, Sir;  Tra. 
Who attends?  Enter the Writs. Ful. 
My passion stifles me.  Mas. 
Are you come  
My delicates Devils cut in way? let him not  
Approach too near, he can take measure  
Of his forehead at this distance.  Pha. 
These were my fears, marriage had made sure work,  
I was against your stay for tilts, and triumphs.  Mam. 
'Tis Mr. Fulbanke.  Ful. 
Would any strumpet vex an honest man thus?  Mam. 
Strumpet; you shall have suell to this jealousy.  Mas. 
Excellent Pigeons! admirable Spiders! ha, ha, ha.  Ful. 
I'll be revenged.  Tra. 
Currat Lex.  Pha. 
Excuse me, Sir, I must follow the Law,  Exeunt. The Writs enclose Fulbanke. Mas. 
Joy Mr. Fulbanke, and a whole bundle of babbies▪ ha', ha, ha.  
Your wedding day was notably deferred  
To be attended with more Ceremony,  
And such an antimasque of sucking Devils.  
He looks like the pied Piper in Germany,  
That undertook to cure the Town of Rats,  
And now the fry of Vermin dance about him.  
I am left to chew my Country cud, an ass,  
A ridden-empty-pated-sordid Coxcomb:  
You do command in chief o'er Cuckold's sconce  
Or Haven, to which all the Tups strike sail,  
And bow in homage to your Sovereign Antlers.  
Most high and mighty half moon, Prince of Becos.  
And so I kiss your hoof.  Exeunt Maslin and Writs. Ful. 
Well; if there be money and malice in the City,  
Expect a black revenge upon ye all.  Exit. Enter Phantasm. Pha. 
My nimble Lawyer thinks he has got my Lady,  
And hugs his happiness, my next work shall be  
To spoil his practice, mischief is my office.  Enter Alamode. 
Most noble Alamode,  Ala, 
My old acquaintance?  Pha. 
I am proud that you will own me, Sir, your Creature.  Ala. 
When is this day of Triumph in the City.  
For high and mighty Fulbanke, and your Ladies  
So much expected marriage?  Pha. 
At the Greek Calends;  
My Lady's has left the Alderman already.  
He may now change his Heraldry, and give  
In's coat an armed beast at the new bull-ring  
In a field dirt.  Ala. 
whether is she gone prithee?  Pha. 
To Travers sir, who has yet no Term for life.  
Your hopes thrive I guess in the fair Honoria.  Ala. 
She's a haggard too.  Pha. 
Possible?  Ala. 
She has gulled us learnedly,  
And took the Scholar, in few months you'll hear  
Her brought to bed of Philosophy, she's gone,  
And I may as soon hope to retrieve thy Lady,  Pha. 
My Lady? with your pardon, gentle sir,  
Can you find in yourself any warm thought,  
Or meaning to my Lady?  Ala. 
Could I wish  
To live, and look at happiness?  Pha. 
You have been a noble Patron to me.  Ala. 
What canst thou do?  Pha. 
Do, I can do the office of a Gentleman,  
And you shall go your part, and perhaps owner.  Ala. 
Make me so happy.  Pha. 
I'll conduct you,  
You come i'th' opportunity.  Exeunt. Enter Travers. Tra. 
My stars conspire to make me a full happiness,  
Since, fame spread my intended marriage  
With Lady Mammon, methinks the people  
Look on me with another face of fear,  
And admiration, in my thoughts I see  
Myself already in the Throne of Law,  
In which the petty purples wait, dispersing  
As I incline to frown, or smile, the fate  
Of trembling mortals,  Enter Phantasm. Pha. 
He is returned.  Tra. 
Where is thy Lady, thou art (I observe) her favourite.  
And must be mine;  Pha. 
She's in her Chamber sir.  Tra. 
Come I will have it so, thou art too humble,  Pha. 
'Tis a becoming Duty, My ambition  
Will be to observe the wonder of your happiness,  
And how you'll rise to greatness, and to glory,  
By matching with my Lady,  Tra. 
You are not  
A stranger to her closet, it will be  
An engagement to acquaint me with her temper.  Pha. 
She is a woman, Sir, but you are wise.  Tra. 
Nay, nay, I must know her nature.  Pha. 
'Tis very gentle, she is angel Gold,  
And you may bend her as you please, she is  
A teeming Lady too.  Tra. 
What Children?  Pha. 
All provided for, they'll not trouble you,  
She has a thousand friends.  Tra. 
Thou art kind, proceed—  Pha. 
You are a Gentleman,  
Whose wisdom I may trust, I should not use  
This freedom else.  Tra. 
Thou mayst tell me any thing.  Pha. 
She loves to be abroad, and to disperse  
Her shine upon some persons that adore her,  
That's all her fault, she won't be confined, Sir;  
And how the softness of your nature will  
Consent, to keep her under lock and key—  Tra. 
Umh! if she be so volatile, I must  
Hang weight upon her, 'twill be necessary.  Enter a Doctor. 
Retain thy wisdom and observe my Lady,  Pha. 
It is my duty, Sir.  Tra. 
My noble Client.  Doc. 
I ha' not leisure to ask how go causes.  Tra. 
Yours will be heard, the first day of the Term.  Doc. 
I build upon your care.  Tra. 
You may be confident,  
Neglect my Doctor, to whose care, and art  
I owe my lungs, and life?  Doc. 
Oh you are pleasant,  
But I am now engaged, and shall desire  
I may be excused, you know my Lady Honoria▪  Tra. 
She is not sick.  Doc. 
No, but a Gentleman  
Whom she declares most precious to her, is,  
(I'th' height of expectation, and fair hopes  
To have been her husband,) desperately fall'n Sick,  
And now I think on't, 'tis my wonder, you  
Made no addresses timely to that Lady.  
Men that are eminent in Law, are wont  
To be ambitious of Honour.  Tra. 
Oh Sir  
It is a maxim in our politics,  
A Judge destroys a mighty practiser.  
When they grow rich, and lazy, they are ripe  
For honour.  Doc. 
You have Sir a swelling fortune.  Tra. 
I have Mammon, I think, and for my own part  
Can easily consent to accept of Lordship.  Doc. 
If this man take the toy, and die, she's worth  
Your thoughts, my learned in the Laws, I wish  
Sir I could serve you.  Tra. 
Nay, nay prithee Doctor.  Doc. 
The Gentleman may suffer,  Tra. 
If he die,  
You and I shall be friends, I'll not engage you  
To poison him.  Doc. 
You have more justice.  Tra. 
Yet I should not break my heart, if he were dead,  
And the fair Lady mine, I know not, but  
This very mention of her, at this nick  
Of time, when her delight is taking leave,  
Hath a strange operation in my fancy:  
You know my constitution, I may want  
Your ayed, but honourably.  Doc. 
You shall command it.  Tra. 
Then I'll to her instantly, and bear you company.  Doc. 
You can pretend no visit, being a stranger.  Tra. 
No, I will go under the notion of  
Your friend, and fellow Doctor, one o'th' College.  Doc, 
You may do so.  Tra. 
I need not shift my habit.  Doc. 
And what then?  Tra. 
Observe, and see the Motions of my Lady,  
Who knows but I may feel her'pulse? I prophesy  
Something will follow fortunate. If I thrive  
Thou shalt be King of Cos, my learned Hippocrates  
And I will be thy Servant.  Doc. 
'Tis too early to court her.  Tra. 
'Tis a fault of modesty  
In men to think so. Women are no fools,  
And howsoe'er they bridle it, 'tis providence  
'T entertain new comforts, I have heard  
A modest Gentleman say, that made his love  
Known to a Lady ere her husband's flesh  
Was cold i'th' crust, I mean new cofind up,  
But he had a repulse, the answer was  
He came too late, the widow had been promised  
The day before.  Doc. 
If you be so resolved,  
I'll wait upon you, Sir:  Tra. 
The rest to my kind stars, come we'll take Coach.  Exit. Enter Mammon Alamode and Phantasm. Mam. 
Presume to lock me up? thou hast my Jewels.  
I'll leave him instantly.  Ala. 
He fears his tenure,  
And would secure your Ladyship from starting,  
But this doth very well become your prudence,  
To quit the house ere he improve his interest,  
By some new quirk in Law.  Pha. 
A noble Gentleman!  
And one that honours you religiously.  Mam. 
You much oblige me sir, and I look on, you  
Designed by providence my preserver; we'll  
Into t'h Country instantly.  Ala. 
Any whether, excellent Phantasm!  
I am your Servant Madam, to wait on you  
Through the World.  Pha. 
I was borne to make you—  
A fool, or I am mistaken.  Enter Dash. 
This is his Clerk, and spy upon your person.  Ala. 
How the rascal squints upon us?  Mam. 
Tell Mr. Travers,  
The Bird is flown, commend me to his nightcap,  
I sha'not see him till the next vacation,  
So farewell penny a sheet.  Ala. 
And dost hear? bid him  
Provide new locks and keys, and bars and bolts,  
And cap the Chimney, lest my Lady fly  
Out at the Lover hole, so commend us to  
The precious owl your Master.  They kick Dash. Pha. 
One token from me.  Exeunt. Das. 
You have trusted me with tokens of remembrance,  
I would my Master had received them in  
His propria persona, to have thanked you.  
Their toes are somewhat harder than my haunches;  
But this is nothing to the general damage,  
If our great Lady Mammon be run from us;  
Which I believe, as sure, as I am waking,  
And have been kicked, the most convincing argument.  
All our hopes come to this? our mighty hopes  
Huge as a Mountain, shrunk into a wart?  
We are undone, and may go hang ourselves.  Exit. Enter Honoria. Hon. 
I was too blame, my curiosity  
Now suffers for the Trial of his virtue;  
And he too apprehensive, when I chid  
The Ambition of his love, made himself past  
The cure of my affection.  Enter Doctor and Travers. 
Sir, you are welcome:  Doc. 
Madam, I presumed  
To bring another able Doctor with me  
For his consult, in case there may be danger.  Hon. 
You have very much obliged me.  Tra. 
She is a very gallant Lady!  
in spight of all the clouds that dwell upon her.  Hon. 
Who waits there? show these Doctor's Mr. Alworth's  
Chamber, there is another Gentleman within  
Of your profession; your cares shall find  
〈◊〉 gratitude becoming both myself,  
and your own worth, and I may tell you Doctor,  
●f it may give the least addition to  
Your Cheerfulness, in his you will preserve my life.  Doct. 
Madam, retain but your own virtues, and be confident.  Hon. 
Poor Alworth, there is left no other way  
To pay my satisfaction to thy merits,  
But with my sorrow for thy sufferings,  
And what will be thought pious to thy memory,  
of Fate translate thee hence: ha, he is returned.  Enter Traverse. 
What think you Sir?  Tra. 
I wish he could sleep Madam, I am for his sleep,  
it would be a benefit, truth is, I much fear him▪  
But 'tis not prudence (give me boldness Madam)  
To let this Sorrow play too much a Tyrant  
On your fair cheek: This shows him precious to you,  
If the Srars envying his converse on Earth,  
Court him to their bright Dwellings, you must be  
Armed with a noble Fortitude, and consent  
To let him rise a Constellation there,  
And not impair yourself, who were not meant  
To be snatched hence, by overhasty sorrow,  
But live the world's best Ornament.  Hon. 
Did you say  
That sleep would much advantage him? What thinks you  
Of some soft murmurs of the Lute, or Voice?  
I have heard the purl of a spring will make  
Our senses glide into a dream I have a Page did use  
To please him much.  Ex. Hon. Enter Doctor. Doct. 
What think you on her?  Tra. 
I think? I cannot think too much upon her.  
But I'll not leave her thus, her very presence  
Is able to recover him.  Doct. 
Let me tell you Sir,  
I find no Danger in him, be then counselled  
Not to betray yourself, you find his temper  
Not apt for your design, Expect a time—  Tra. 
I love her infinitely. Mammon is a Blouze,  
A deformed Gipsy, didst ere see her Doctor?  
She paints abominably, eyed like a Tumbler,  
Her Nose has all the colours of the Rainbow,  
Her Lips are blue, and her teeth straddle, you  
May pick'em with a bedstaff.  Doct. 
You describe  
An Elegant person.  Tra. 
But Honoria  
Has all perfections. Stay, what fees d'ye think  
I have had of you since our acquaintance, there's  
A purse of gold— no ceremony, I am still  
In thy arrears for bringing me to see  
This wonder of her sex.  Doct. 
You are not wild.  Tra. 
Your cause shall cost you nothing too, that ended,  
Quarrel with all the Country, your Law's paid for.  
Serve me but now, I'll be thy slave for ever.  Exit. Doct. 
I now suspect the Lawyer is short lived,  
Men of his Robe are seldom guilty of  
These restitutions, but who can help it?  
If I knew any handsome way to serve him,  
He has obliged me.  Exit. Music, a Song. Enter Doctor. Doct. 
He'll shame us all,  
He's zealously persuading the poor Gentleman  
To die with all speed, and tells him stories  
Of Heaven, what a fine place it is, and what  
Excellent company the Angels are;  
What a base Prison to a noble Soul  
The world is, nothing right under the Moon,  
Or worth a manly thought; and presently  
He courts my Lady, and falls into such raptures  
In her commendation. The Gentleman  
(Whose Crisis is not desperate, if I  
Have any Judgement) smiles at his folly.  
They're both here.  Enter Traverse and Honoria. Tra. 
He's a Gentleman, whose condition,  
And as he has relation to your favours,  
May invite some passion: But you are wiset  
Then to condemn yourself to solitude,  
And for his absence to despise mankind;  
Be just for your own sake, and Madam, look  
Beyond his Hearse, with pity on the living,  
Amongst which, you cannot want, as just admirers,  
And some that may be worth your second thoughts.  Hon. 
What mean you Sir?  Tra. 
I mean your second choice.  Hon. 
This language makes your Charity suspected.  Doct. 
You are too violent, leave us a while.  Ex. Tr. Hon. 
Your friend is full of counsel.  Doct. 
You have goodness,  
To place an innocent sense upon his language,  
I know he has much honour to your person,  
And 'tis sometimes as necessary, to  
Advise the living to preserve their health,  
Which their immoderate sorrows would consume,  
As cure the languishing patient.  Enter Travers hastily. Tra. 
Now Madam,  
Your grief is useless to him, he is dead.  Hon. 
Dead?  Doct. 
She Faints.  Tra. 
A blessed Opportunity!  
There is a Coach at door will hold us all,  
My dearest Esculapian, help, and find  
A bounty will deserve it.  They carry in Honoria.  

ACT IU.  Enter Traverse. Tra. 
I Have secured the person of Honoria,  
At my Manor in the Country, who believes  
Her Alworth dead, and must be allowed some time  
For that digestion. I have made known  
Myself, and the affection which engaged me.  
But though my Lady Mammon have a place  
Beneath her in my thoughts; on better counsel,  
I think it wisdom to preserve my interest  
In her, already mine by her consent,  
And the great plea of Law, Possession.  
If I can make the Lady Honoria sure,  
She shall be my wife, and that my Concubine,  
Rare, Excellent!  Enter Dash. Dash. 
Oh Sir, you're welcome home.  Tra. 
Thou look'st with a warped face.  Dash. 
You can resolve me,  
Is there no case, wherein a man, without  
Impeachment to his Credit or his Conscience,  
May be allowed to hang himself?  Tra. 
What's the matter?  
Thou art not desperate?  Dash. 
I know not, but  
I find some inclinations to Hemp.  
You are my Master, I may be concerned  
To follow a good example.  Tra. 
Leave your fooling,  
How does my Lady Mammon?  Da. 
There's the business.  
My Lady Mammon is Sir—  Tra. 
What, what is she?  Das. 
She is my Lady Mammon, yet I lie,  
She is not mine, I would she were your Worships,  
I know you will be mad, but it must out,  
My Ladies gone.  Tra. 
Ha?  Das. 
Run quite away Sir,  
With a glib Gentleman came to visit her,  
And the young spirit that did wait upon her.  
Without much ceremony, she would have your Worship  
Provide more locks, and keys, and bars, and bolts.  
I tell you Sir, Verbatim, for a need  
I have it all in pedescript.  Tra. 
Mammon gone?  Das. 
What think you Sir, of a ne Exeat Regnum?  Tra. 
Gone? my vexation? no pursuit will reach her,  
Give her the start, and she'll outstrip the Devil.  
These things will turn me wild, but that's no cure,  
I must be a man again, and tame this passion,  
Her loss may have recompense, if Honoria  
Can yet be gained, my hopes are full of blossom,  
I'll return instantly, come you along Sir▪  Enter Men carrying burdens of Money. 
What are these? ha? 'tis money, whence I pray  
Comes all this Treasure?  1. 
From the City Sir.  Tra. 
But whether goes it?  1. 
Do you not observe  
Us march in rank and file, this money goes  
To maintain many honest Gentlemen  
That want it, that will fight, and do fine things  
For all our goods; you are a fool I see,  
And do not know the Law.  Tha 
What Law?  1. 
Club Law.  Tra. 
How's that?  1. 
The Cannon Law, do I speak loud enough?  
The Gentlemen behind will tell you more.  Enter Fulbank and Citizens, other men waiting with Bags of money. Tra. 
I like not this: let us to horse immediately.  Exit. Ful. 
'Tis high time, that we tame the insolence,  
Of this long Robe, these Princes of the Law  
Will invade all our Liberties and Fortunes.  1. Cit 
Presume to take our Lady Mammon from us?  Ful. 
And as I hear, she's closely hurried  
To a Castle in the Country, made a Prisoner.  2. Cit 
I should consent the City be still great,  
And our names spread, like our ambitions,  
But we not prudently consider, whom  
We trust with our revenge—  Ful. 
Our Mercenaries,  
Who finds 'em buff, and iron, and when they  
Come lame and halting home, who shall provide 'em  
Good Hospitals, and old shirts to make lint on?  
When we please, we can scatter all the Regiments▪  
If we but rein our purses.  1. Cit 
I am clear  
There is no other way to carry on  
The work, the sword strikes Terror, and who knows,  
The body of the Law being vast, and powerful,  
Might (if not timely thus prevented) raise  
Considerable strength and opposition.  
But thus we stifle all, and having once  
Recovered Mammon, we are Princes.  
Omnes, Princes!  Enter Colonel, and Captain Squanderbag: Squ. 
Where shall we dine Colonel? I ha' lost  
My credit at the Ordinary, this Town  
I think is only situate to starve in.  
What are these?  Col. 
They have City faces.  Squa. 
And are a thought too handsome to be Sergeants,  
They have serious eyes upon us, and move to us.  Col. 
Would you with me Gentlemen?  Ful. 
Yes Sir, with you.  2 Cit 
May I take boldness Sir, to ask your name?  Squa. 
My name?  2 Cit 
For no harm Sir, you are a Soldier,  
And I presume have had commands.  Squa. 
What then Sir, keep off.  2 Cit 
I come in friendship, and mean all  
Civilities to your person: d'ye want money?  Squ. 
Would you have your pate broke?  
For such a foolish question to a Gentleman?  
I do want money Sir, you won't furnish me.  2 Cit 
Do not mistake yourself, come hither sirrah,  
Will this do you much harm?  Squ, 
Harm! pray be covered. Miracles! d'ye know  
What you have done?  2 Cit 
An act of Justice,  
To call it Charity, would slain your honour,  
I look for no security.  Squa. 
Not a note under my hand never to pay you,  
What must I do for all this Sir? whose throat  
Would you have cut now? these fine Devils  
Must do something.  2 Cit 
Buy you new clothes, a better sword▪  
The Leather of your boots are of two families,  
You may want linen too, get fresh, and part  
With bosom friends.  Squa. 
I have more stowage.  2 Cit 
And I'll employ it, at your service Sir,  He giveth him another bag. Squa. 
What will become of me?  2 Cit 
Nay Sir, I must tell you,  
You're like to have more of this.  Squa. 
Has he no cloven foot?  
This is the rarest Citizen!  Enter Colonel, Fulbank. 2 Cit 
d'ye hear Sir?  
We are making of our Will, and in the humour  
That now predominates, that Gentleman  
May be the City's heir.  Squa. 
Were it not pity this should be a dream now?  Ful. 
You have commission, and full instructions,  
Be sure you do not pinch to spare our purses,  
Our Money grows, we are fain to weed the silver,  
Our men are rank, and rot upon the stalk  
For want of cutting, every drum-stick is  
A Lime-twig, they are mad for innovations,  
Pray know my brother Sir.  Salute Col. 
I am his faithful servant.  2 Cit 
One of the Birds, that keep the Capitol,  
Our feathers are all at your service Gentlemen,  
When you have plucked and picked us well, you may  
Give order for our roasting, we are tame Sir.  Squa. 
Beshrew me an understanding fellow.  Ful. 
We have no more to say, 'tis the Public cause,  
Bring Mammon home, and we will rout the Laws.  1 Cit 
And so we'll pray for you.  Col. 
For yourselves Gentlemen, I do conceive  
We shall do well enough.  Exeunt F. & Ci. 
Captain Squanderbag,  
What think you of this change? silver comes in  
Upon us like a Sea.  Squa. 
An ebb must be expected, I hate naturally  
This metal of the Moon, ●●is a pale flood,  
Would I were in Pactolus' streams, or Tagus,  
There were a lasting Element.  Col. 
What do you  
Think of these Golden Images?  Squa. 
I honour the bright sons of Sol.  Col. 
Pity these Gentlemen should want Civil War,  
They take such pains, and pay so heartily,  
We have much to do o'th' sudden.  Squa. 
This long peace  
Hath made us tame i'th' world, let 'em now pay ' fort.  Col. 
We are emergent from our shades, let's rise.  
With subtle motion, treasure makes men wise.  Exeunt. Enter Phantasm, Maslin, Contreymen. Phan. 
She has gulled the Lawyer too.  Mas. 
Most excellent,  
I do adore her wit, and will she visit  
The country, ha? come nearer,  Phan. 
I have repent Sir, my past neglect?  
And made this satisfaction by my Counsel,  
Which has prevailed, and now she comes to you Sir,  
With pure affection to yourself, the Lady  
Mammon is only yours.  Mas. 
Did you hear that?  
The Empress of the world is coming hither  
To me, with pure affection to my person,  
We are her Vassals.  Phan. 
'Cause the times are dangerous  
Sir, she comes private, but one Gentleman  
That knows not her design, I ever thought  
You were born to be a great man.  Mas. 
We'll go forth to meet her.  Phan. 
By no means Sir, 'twas her desire,  
You should be only thus prepared, I'll tell her.  Exit. Phan. Mas. 
'Tis my happiness,  
Shall I be at last a Dominus fac totum?  
There's Latin for you Neighbours, I am inspired  
With Languages, with all things, and you shall,  
The poorest Copiholder of my Tenants  
Be allowed a Concubine.  1. 
Whaw! then we shall  
Be Turk's Sir.  Mas. 
Turk's? the Turks a Civil Gentleman.  2. 
But no Christiam.  Mas. 
Ye'e are a fool, we  
Must all come to't if the times hold, and my  
Deer Mammon stay with us.  1. 
Bless me a Turk!  4. 
Is that such a matter; why you, and I,  
And the best on us, are but Turks, if you  
Take us one way.  1. 
I grant, as we are brethren, and  
Turks, another way, and worse—  Mas. 
Let me see, how shall I consume my wealth?  1. 
What think you of building Sir a Church?  Mas. 
A Church? and give it my own name to save  
A Consecration, No, no, I must do  
Something to shame the Chronicles— silence,  
I'll build another Town in every County,  
In midst of that, a most magnificent College,  
To entertain men of most eminent wit,  
To invent new Religions.  1. 
That were excellent, we want Religion extremely.  Mas. 
Can none of you invent? I think I must  
Keep men in pension to project me ways  
To spend my gold.  2. 
Pave all the highway with't,  
'Twould be excellent for Travellers.  Mas. 
I'll pave a street, that shall run cross the Island,  
From Sea to Sea, with Pearl build a bridge  
From Dover Cliff to Calais.  1. 
A Draw-bridge?  4. 
This may be done, but I am of opinion  
We sha'not live to see't.  Mas. 
'Twon't be want of money, but of time,  
Mere time, to finish it; my Lady Mammon,  
Believe it, can do all things; for your parts,  
But think what you would have, I say no more:  
If she smile but upon you, you are made,  
And may go sleep, and when you wake, run mad  
With telling of your money— ha? 'tis she.  Enter Mammon, Alamode and Phantasm. 
I Charge you kneel, and kiss her hand,  
My Lady Mammon!  Ala. 
How's this?  Mas. 
Welcome to my heart, Madam.  Al. 
Is my Lady in earnest?  Mam. 
You have done me Sir a favour, I'm at home,  
And disengage your further service; I  
Wish you a fair retreat.  Ala. 
Do you hear Madam?  
You will not thus reward me, after all  
My travel and attendance?  Mam. 
'Tis my meaning,  
Nor will it Sir, be safe to lose much time,  
These have a natural antipathy  
To men of your fine making.  Phan. 
'Tis Alamode the Courtier,  
Whom my Lady has only made her property,  
To be part of her convoy.  Ala. 
You won't marry him?  Mam. 
I think I sha'll not,  
I must not be confined, while there is air,  
And men to change.  Mas. 
How Master Courtier?  Phan. 
They'll toss him in a blanket.  Mas. 
As long as you please Madam, he's welcome,  
And he shall eat, if you frown, he must vanish,  
Or I have Cannibals that will devour him;  
With his sword, boots treble tanned and spurs upon 'em.  Ala. 
Sure I dream, but Madam  
You won't play the Cockatrice thus wi'me.  Mam. 
If you will stay, upon your good behaviour;  
I may dispense some private favour—  Ala. 
Good, excellent Whore, I'll stay to observe her humour.  Mas. 
I'll be your guide Madam,  
On, go before, and bid'm ring the bells,  
For bonfires, 'twill be time enough at night  
To burn up all the Villages about us.  Ala. 
Indeed it shall be yours: Sir, you are too civil.  Exeunt. Enter Travers, and Dash the Clark. Tra. 
Entreat my Lady hither, and attend her,  
I did embrace too much, Mammon is lost,  
If my stars prosper my ambition  
To Honoria, I forgive their future influence.  A Discovery of Treasures and jewels. 
Here is a blaze to melt a frozen soul.  Enter Honoria. Hon. 
What is my Jailor's pleasure with his Prisoner?  Tra. 
That character doth wound your servant, Madam,  
● am your Prisoner, by the fate of Love,  
Condemned to everlasting chains, my heart  
Consumes at every frown, and I beg now  
Not to be happy owner of that beauty,  
since you decree my Exile, but to die,  
Collect up so much terror in a look,  
and from that Throne of Majesty, your eyes,  
●art forth a flame of wrath so high, it may  
turn me to ashes, I'll submit your Sacrifice.  Hon. 
I have no thoughts so impious, to destroy  
〈◊〉 life that may be happy, if you be not  
Your own Tormenter.  Tra. 
Those words have a sound of mercy, Madam.  Hon. 
Cruelty and honour  
are inconsistent.  Tra. 
I taste Heaven,  
Already, a warm stream descends upon  
My timorous heart; Oh pause, let me consider  
How much I am behind in worth, to know  
What change hath blessed it.  Hon. 
Change?  Tra. 
Let me but touch  
your white hand, were my breath the Treasure  
of all the East, no other Altar should  
Have Incense, I am lost to find the sweetness.  Salutes her. 
For every smile I drop a Pearl, these Diamonds  
Are pale, and beg a lustre from your Eyes,  
Wear them, and be their ornament: I'll rifle  
My Indies for more wealth, and when I have,  
With giving up my soul, purchased a kiss  
Of bright Honoria, from my dust at one,  
One pitying look upon me, I ascend  
A new Creation from your Eye.  Hon. 
What means  
This rapture? what would all this passionate noise?  
Expound, I am still Honoria.  Tra. 
Oh say but mine.  Hon. 
Sir, shut up your shop,  
Your gay temptations won't take.  Tra. 
Is't possible?  
Not all this treasure buy one kiss?  Hon. 
A thousand,  
From those that have a subtle art to sell them:  
Why do you trifle with your soul? Intents  
That carry honour, need not bribe with wealth  
To purchase nothing.  Tra. 
I can love you virtuously.  Hon. 
By that love be commanded then, to tell me  
How have you disposed of Alworth's dust, why was I  
Surprised dishonourably, and transported  
Against my own thoughts and consent, to this  
Unhappy place? and immuted up like  
Some guilty person, not allowed the freedom  
Of air, nor to see heaven at all, but from  
The narrow limits of a Casement? can you  
Interpret this affection? 'tis tyranny,  
That must without a penitence, draw from heaven  
A justice, and from me (by you made miserable)  
A just contempt of all your flatteries.  Tra. 
There are some men i'th' world, that would not think  
You handsome in that look, and make you tremble.  Hon. 
You dare not be so impious.  Tra. 
When my love,  
That courts you honourably is scorned, I can  
Be angry, had I wanton thoughts about me,  
As some may mix with flesh and blood, you are  
Within my power.  Hon. 
That power is circumscribed,  
You have confined already this poor weight  
Of Dust I carry, but if blacker thoughts  
Tempt you to force my honour, I can call  
Rescue from heaven.  Tra. 
What needs this bravery? you see I use  
No violence, I court you to a Bride.  Hon. 
My vows once gave me up a pledge to Alworth,  
And my heart cut out for his Epitaph,  
Will not contain one Character beside.  Tra. 
I play myself to death in flames unpitied,  
Resolve, nor look for tedious consider;  
If I may honourably succeed your Alworth,  
His soul had not a purer faith to serve you,  
If this be slighted—  Enter Dash the Clark. Das. 
Help, help, we are all undone, O Sir, where is  
Your two handed sword?  Tra. 
Thou Messenger of Horror, what's the matter?  Das. 
The Castle is besieged, and the Beacons burns blue Sir.  
The Devil's up in Arms, and comes against us  
With the whole posse Comitatus! they  
Will pull the house down they have broke into  
The base Court, Heaven protect my Pia mater.  
I did but peep out of the Garret, and  
One Soldier swore a huge Granado at me.  
They cry down with the Laws, and if they have not  
Honoria sound of wind and limb, they'll cut us,  
Sir, into Labels. Would I had compounded  
For any leg▪ or my left arm; but now,  
Now farewell comely Court-hand, and long Dashes,  
Do you not hear the Mandrakes? what do you do Sir?  
I'll into the Cellar strait, and bar the door,  
And if there be no remedy, ere they reach me,  
I'll drink, and die a Martyr.  Tra. 
I am blasted! stay,  
There is a close contrivement in this Chamber,  
Madam, will you retreat, and save your person?  
This way sirrah.  Exeunt. Dash. 
d'ye think they will not smell us out? I fear  
My constitution won't hold.  Soldiers within. 
Down with the Laws & custos Rotulorum,  
Fico for Writs and Mousetraps.  Enter Officers, General, and Fulbank. Off. 
Make a guard Soldiers.  Ful. 
I am come Sir, to see fashions.  Col. 
You find us drudging Sir, in your affairs,  
Captain, I leave him to your entertainment,  
That face deserves a reverence.  Hon. 
'Tis the Colonel,  
But he looks more composed, and carries state.  Col. 
Madam.  Ful. 
And how go things, my Military friends?  
My gallant men 〈◊〉 action? you are now  
In sprightly postures, and become yourselves,  
What pity 'tis, mwn of your noble soul  
Should want employment.  Squa. 
We must all acknowledge  
Your care of us.  Ful. 
I honoured your profession,  
Since I first handled Arms.  Squa. 
What service, with your favour▪ have you seen?  Ful. 
Hot service, I was knocked down thrice, and lost  
My beard at taking of a Fort in Finsbury,  
And when I had my Marshal trinkets on,  
I thought myself as brave a Macedonian  
As the best on 'em. But where's the Lady Mammon?  Col. 
Surprised? and ever since a Prisoner?  
He is not worth my passion, this room  
Has in your presence a protection.  
I take your word, you won't quit the place  
Without your servants knowledge, Madam, but  
If the sly Enemy of your honour, think  
By obscuring his base head, to fly our Justice,  
When you are safe, I'll fire the house upon him.  Das. 
Here, here we are, fire, fire.  Tra. 
Be silent Villain.  Das. 
Yes, and be burnt alive, I cannot find the door.  Col. 
From whence that voice?  Das. 
'Tis here, 'tis here, I hate burning, as  
I do the Devil, and a dry Proverb, help.  Squa. 
The Lawyers here.  Tra. 
Gentlemen use no violence, I'll come forth  
And meet your fury.  Cap. 
What are you sirrah?  Das. 
A poor Court-hand practiser.  Cap. 
The choice is given, whether thou wilt be hanged  
At the next tree, or have your ears cut off?  Das. 
My ears, my ears by any means Gentlemen▪  
Hanging will make a villainous long Dash.  
Once cropped, and twice a Traitor, sweet Gentlemen,  
Delicate Commanders.  Tra. 
Time has brought  
Your turn about, by your respects to●honour,  
I see your soul is noble; though I cannot  
Die at my own choice, I can make a will,  
And dispose some Legacies, rich Jewels, Sir,  
Plate, Gold, and Silver.  Ful. 
All this I lay claim to,  
They were the Lady Mammon's, in whose right  
I challenge all, I take those to my custody.  Col. 
How? How? Marshal take him to yours.  Ful. 
Me to the Marshal? that were pretty, me?  Mar. 
Come Sir—  Ful. 
How? I beseech one word, have you forgot me Sir?  Col. 
Your name is Fulbank.  Ful. 
Plain Fulbank? it was I,  
Did in those days bring in the good advance.  Col. 
You did, your duty Martial—  Ful. 
I ha' done Sir,  Col. 
So have not I, secure his person too,  
Safe, as your life will answer it.  Enter one with a Letter. 
Letters, whence? ha?  
From Alamode?  He reads. Alworth Discovers himself to Honoria, Squanderbag observes them. 
He writes where a party of horse may handsomely  
Secure the Lady Mammon, give him a reward,  
Make it your province Captain, you will find  
Directions in that paper.  Whispers. Squa. 
Sir, I have observed  
That Gentleman with the black-patch uncase  
His eye once to my Lady, there's some mystery,  
I do not like it.  Col. 
Some spy: when I walk off, command him to the  
Guard till further order.  
Madam, I call it my first happiness,  
That I am in a capacity to serve you,  
And you shall order your own justice.  Hon. 
What will they do with that young Gentleman?  Col. 
She minds not me.  Hon. 
Your pardon.  Col. 
Give me favour to attend you,  
With whom my soul desires to be renewed,  
Your faithful honourer, march on.  Ex. Co. etc. Alw. 
I obey you.  Squa. 
You will know the cause hereafter, and us better,  
When both your eyes are open.  Pulls of the Patch. Cap. 
Thou hast cured him: d'ye know us Sir?  Alw. 
I know ye all.  Squa. 
What are we?  Alw. 
You're all close fires, in want of air kept tame,  
But know no bounds, let loose into a flame.  Squa. 
We'll teach you better Morals Sir, Come on.  Exeunt omnes.  

ACT. V.  Enter Squanderbag and a Captain. Cap. 
HIs thoughts are all now taken up with Courtship  
To Honoria.  Squa. 
You may see Captain,  
A handsome piece of flesh and blood may do much,  
When there's no other enemy i'th' the field.  Cap. 
What will be done with the Gentleman was carried  
To the guard?  Squa. 
The stranger with a black Eye?  
He's fast enough, and will have opportunity  
Of place and time, to cool his hot devotions,  
If our Commander in chief march on thus.  Enter Serjeant and Soldiers. Ser. 
Are not these pretty hand Granado's, Gentlemen?  1 Sol. 
Fire to the fuze, and toss some health about.  2 So. 
Come away, tomy Colonel, honest Squanderbag.  Squa. 
Ha? these are my Scythians, mark those fellows Captain,  
Cut'em in pieces like so many Adders,  
They'll join again, i'ch compass of an acre,  
Their limbs will creep together, and march on  
To the next Rendezvouz without a halt.  2 Ser. 
This is Spanish.  Ler. 
Draw home your arrow to the head, my Centaur.  1. So. 
Mine is French Wine.  5 So. 
You must take your chance,  
The Yeoman of the wine-cellar did not  
Provide'em for our palate.  2 So. 
Supernaculum!  
See, there lies Spain already, now would I fight—  Ser. 
Drink thou meanest.  2 Sol. 
With any King in Europe.  
Do not spill your Ammunition; ah Sergeant,  
This was excellent Drink.  1 So. 
Who wants my Colonel?  2. So. 
I want it, tope, give me't.  Ser. 
He'll have't again?  2 So. 
The tother charge, and then we'll overrun  
Christendom, Sa, sa:  
When you've done with Christendom, what shall  
Become o'th' Heathen Princes?  2 So. 
We'll put the Heathen Princes in a bag.  Ser. 
A bottle thou meanest, he's all for drink.  2 So▪ 
And after, roast the Great Turk with his Bashaws,  
Like a pudding in's belly.  Squa. 
Thou Boy!  Ser. 
There he is for eating.  Ser. 
Dost know what thou hast said now? but  
What shall be done with the Jews?  2 Sol. 
They are included,  
And go upon the score of Modern Christians,  
There sha'not a Nation scape us.  Squa. 
These are the men,  
The tools, that cut our Triumph out o'th' quarry.  Cap. 
They will deserve their pay.  Squa. 
Oh pay is necessary, use it now and then,  
Like Physic, it keeps the Soldier in health  
And expectation, they must fight for honour  
Sometimes.  1 So. 
Tobacco, hay?  Ser. 
Here boys, a Magazine, with pipes attending,  
White as my Lady's tooth, and shining more  
Than forehead of Dulcinea de Toboso.  4 So. 
A Soldiers a brave life.  3 So. 
'Tis cheap, all these things come to us by nature.  Ser. 
Our Colonel.  Squa. 
I'll cashier him that rises, keep your postures,  
We are all Soldiers, and can sit and drink wi'ye,  
To your Arms Gentlemen again, ha? this is wine.  Ser, 
We have the modest gift of drinking, Sir,  
Without inquiry of the Grape or Vintage,  
Or from what Merchant.  Squa. 
Is not this better than a tedious Prenticeship,  
Bound by Indentures to a shop and drudgery,  
Watching the Rats, and Customers by Owl light?  
Tied to perpetual language of, What lack ye?  
Which you pronounce, as ye had been taught like  
Starlings.  
If any Gudgeon bite to damn your souls  
For less than sixpence in the pound. Oh base!  
Your glittering shoes, long graces, and short meals,  
Expecting but the comfortable hour  
Of eight a clock, and the hot Pippin-pies,  
To make your mouth up? all the day not suffered  
To air yourselves, unless your minikin Mistress  
Command you to attend her to a Christening,  
To bring home plums, for which they may relieve  
Your teeth that water, with her next suppository.  
You have some Festivals, I confess, but when  
They happen, you run wild to the next Village,  
Conspire a knot, and club your groats apiece  
For Cream and Prunes, not daring to be drunk,  
Nothing of honour done, now you're Gentlemen,  
And in a capacity to be all Commanders, if you dare fight,  2 S. 
Fight? you know we dare, Sir,  
And with the Devil.  2 Squa. 
In hope you won't give him quarter,  
There's money, do not purchase Earth, nor Heaven with it.  
I must away, remember the two things.  1 So. 
The two Dees.  Squa. 
Drink, and your Duty, so,  
Now as you were—  2 So. 
Noble Colonel,  Exit. 
Let me kiss thy hand, I am thine body and soul.  3 So. 
But will you fight with the Devil?  2 So. 
Why not?  3 So. 
So will not I.  2 So. 
Won't you fight with the Devil, and one of  
Our Regiment?  3 So. 
Not I?  1 So. 
Perhaps the Devil is his friend.  3 So. 
And yet in a good cause—  2 So. 
He won't fight with you then, base, I say,  
To take advantage of the cause, or person:  
Fight upon any cause with any person.  
Hark you Sergeant, you do know our Duties  
Better than we ourselves, what do we fight for!  
Silence the first word of Command, let us  
Be serious, what, what do we fight for?  Ser. 
For pay, for pay, my Bull-rooks.  2 So. 
La'ye now,  
Can any Christian Officer say more?  Ser. 
Hang these Intergatories,  
And give us to'her charge toth' man i'th' Moon.  2 So. 
All, all give fire together, Oh for a noise  
Of Trumpets.  Drum's beaten. 1 So. 
Here are Drums.  Ser. 
The General is coming this way, to your Arms  
Skud ye Metropolites.  Enter Colonel, Squanderbag, Captain and Alamode. Ala. 
Sir, I congratulate your honourable  
Employment.  Col. 
And I your noble presence here.  Ala. 
I could not with my Rhetoric invite  
My Lady hither?  Col. 
I sent you a party—  Ala. 
Yes Sir,  
Your men of rank and file do carry still  
The strong persuasions, they prevailed with her.  
I left her to the Guard.  A shout▪ Col. 
The reason of that Clamour?  Cap. 
The Soldiers, Sir, express their joy thus loud,  
That Lady Mammon is brought in, the Guard  
Hardly secure her person.  Col. 
Give her fair access,  
On pain of death, be none uncivil to her,  
This service will deserve a memory,  
And public thanks, all our design did reach  
But to gain her.  Ala. 
The work will be to keep her,  
The Gipsy has more windings than a Serpent▪  
The Moon is not more changing.  Enter Mammon, Phantasm, Guard. Col. 
Is this she?  Phan. 
Madam, I'll take my leave.  Mam. 
Forsake me in this  
Condition?  Phan. 
If I could expect a worse  
Would fall upon you, Madam, I'd not part yet.  Mam. 
How?  Phan. 
For I can tell you, what will follow instantly,  
And it does please my wickedness extremely,  
The next payday you will be torn in pieces,  
Oh'twill be excellent sport, ha, ha, ha.  Mam. 
And canst thou laugh Villain? Secure him Soldiers.  Phan. 
They will have work enough about your Ladyship.  
I am going as nimbly as a spirit, Madam,  
And to your greater comfort, know I am one.  Mam. 
The Devil thou art.  Phan. 
Called by another name,  
Your evil Genius, to assure you that  
You have been all this while cozened, my dear Mistress,  
And that these colours are fantastic, see,  
I vansh into air.  Guard. 
Presto, was this your Devil, Madam?  Mam. 
Oh my misfortune!  Col. 
Madam, your person is most welcome hither.  Mam. 
I fear your Soldiers, Sir,  Col. 
You may be confident  
Of safety from them, Madam, that fight for you,  
We are your guard, all wait upon my Lady,  
And let your applications be with reverence,  
And see her entertainments high, and such  
As may become my honour, and her person.  Exit. 
What is there left addition to my happiness?  
Mammon and Honoria both within my power?  
Ambition write non ultra, fix, fix here,  
The two great darlings of mankind are mine,  
Both Excellent, and yet but one Divine.  
Wealth is the nerves of War and Wi●, without which  
We are dull, and useless engines, Mammon leads  
To Conquest, and rewards out blood and watches▪  
But honour is the lustre of all Triumph,  
The Glories that we wear are dim without her,  
Till she come in, the Lamp, our glorious flame,  
We grope our way i'th' dark, and walk on crutches.  
Riches may shine, and Starlike grace the night,  
But Honour is the radiant soul of light.  Exit. Alworth in Prison. Alw. 
I almost could be angry with my fate,  
And call that care of my Physician  
unkind, that did remove my first distempers;  
I should have dropped into the shades, and lost  
Her memory, that flatters me to ruin▪  
what's all this murmur? are these thoughts my own?  
Or is there some black spirit crept into  
My melancholy blood, that would corrupt  
That spring, by which my innocence should live?  
Hence, I command thee hence, thou dire Enchantment,  
And let the virtues of Honoria  
Resume their throne within my soul, and strike  
Religious tremble through every thought,  
Lest I repine at Providence? She is here.  Enter Honoria, and Marshal. Mar. 
This warrant must admit you.  Hon. 
There's for your Office, you may withdraw yourself.  Mar. 
Your servant.  Exit. Hon. 
Oh my Alworth?  Alw. 
This humility  
Transcends my hope and merit, I am now  
No more a Prisoner, since my better part  
(Enlarged by this your charitable visit)  
Hath freedom to behold my greatest happiness,  
Yourself.  Hon. 
I am so full of joy  
To see thee alive, I cannot ask thee, how  
Thou wert preserved.  Alw. 
Heaven was not willing 〈◊〉  
Should die, till I had given you better proof  
How much I would deserve your smile upon me.  Enter Colonel and Marshal. Mar. 
Here you may, undiscovered, Sir, observe 'em.  Col. 
You may be gone, and wait at some fit distance.  Alw. 
My cure was hastened by your thoughts upon me,  
And my desires had wings to reach your person,  
(For I was soon acquainted how you were  
Conveyed) and next my thoughts to kiss your hands,  
I brought my resolutions of revenge  
Upon that Traitor's head, that ravished ye  
So rudely from my eyes.  Hon. 
Prithee no more,  
But let our hearts renew, and seal a contract  
In spite of present storms; and I am not  
Without some hopes to change thy sad condition,  
For he, to whose commands thou owest this misery▪  
Is pleased to say he loves me, and I can  
Employ his kindness to no better use  
Then thy Enlargement; if this prove unfortunate,  
It shall at least diminish thy affliction,  
That I can bear a part, and suffer with thee.  Alw. 
Better I sink by many deaths, than you  
Engage yourself to any unkind Fate  
For me; I have crept newly from my dust,  
And can alone walk cheerfully to silence  
And the dark grave: But do you believe, Madam,  
This man looks on you with a noble flame?  
He's now a great man.  Hon. 
His affection  
Has all the shows of honour, and such high  
Civilities flow from him.  Alw. 
Pause a little,  
And give me leave to tell you, as these seeds  
Of War grow up, I cannot think a person  
(Though many may be honourable) can  
Better Deserve—  Hon. 
What?  Alw. 
To be made Lord of this  
Fair Empire.  Hon. 
Did this language come from Alworth?  
That said he loved me?  Alw. 
Yes, with noblest fervour,  
My love commands it Madam, and I can  
In my true service to Honoria,  
Advise her to call home her noble beams,  
Thar shine to the discredit of her light  
On me, that would upon a worthier object  
Draw up more admiration to her brightness,  
And at the same time, by their influence show  
The beauties of her better choice.  Hon. 
This language  
I understand not yet; can Alworth then  
Find in his heart any consent, to give up  
His interest in Honoria to another?  Alw. 
Yes, when Honoria is concerned to meet  
A greater happiness than Alworth, I  
Can make myself an Exile, which is but  
The justice of my love to her great merit.  
I am a trifle Madam, a thing meant  
Beneath your smile, a very walking shadow,  
And time will come, when you have showed me all  
The bounties of your grace, nay sealed them mine,  
By the most holy character of marriage,  
Yet than I must forsake you, when my nerves  
Shrink up, when the weak flow of my blood  
Cool in their channel, and tame Nature leaves me  
A spoil to death—  Hon. 
Why do you talk of death,  
So far off?  Alw. 
Though we do not hear him tread,  
Yet every minute he approaches, Madam;  
And give me leave to tell you, without flattering  
Myself, I am in danger; first a Prisoner,  
A spy they may pretend, but this will vanish.  
It is the title of your servant, Madam,  
Is both my hononr, and my crime, nor can I  
Wave my relation to your favours: this  
Known to the man, under whose power we stand,  
His angry breath may doom me to the scaffold,  
And I must then resign, nor will the act  
Be mine, but a constraint, and I then lose  
The glory that may now be mine, to engage  
Him in your smiles, you in his love.  Hon. 
When will this dream be over?  Alw. 
As for me,  
It shall be enough at distance to look on you  
With thoughts as innocent as your own, and if  
For the convenience of both our persons,  
One Earth must not contain us, do not think  
That I can wander, where I shall forget  
To tell the stranger world your story, Madam;  
And when I have made all mankind, where I come,  
Bow to your name, and taught 'em to repeat it  
In all their dangers, and their frights, to cure them,  
I will seek out some air, that is infectious,  
Where no birds dare inhabit, or man build.  
A cottage to repose his wearied head,  
And there I prophesy, by the virtuous charm.  
Of your blessed name, to purge it, and as soon  
As the great miracle is spread, to invite  
The best of every Nation to live there,  
And own you Tutelar Angel.  Hon. 
Fie, no more,  
Alworth now dreams indeed, but he more vainly  
Persuades me to forget my vows to him:  
Is this a fear to die, or something like it?  
For I would give it fain some other name.  Alw. 
A fear to die, that arrow strikes too deep,  
If you but think so, and wounds more▪ than all  
The horror my destruction can appear in.  
If I can entertain the thoughts of life  
Without you, how much easier must it be  
To die for your concernment? I ha' not lived  
After the rate to fear another world.  
We come from nothing into life, a time  
We measure with a short breath, and that often  
Made tedious too, with our own cares that fill it,  
Which like so many Atoms in a Sunbeam,  
But crowd and justle one another. All,  
From the adored Purple to the Haircloth,  
Must centre in a shade, and they that have  
Their virtues to wait on'm, bravely mock  
The rugged storms, that so much fright 'em here,  
When their souls launch by death into a sea  
That's ever calm.  Hon. 
This deserves my attention,  
And you in this small lecture Alworth, have  
Made me in love with death, who for thy sake  
Can with my innocence about me, take  
More satisfaction to bleed away  
My life, than keep it, with the smallest stain  
Upon my honour. This I speak, not to  
Court up your drooping thoughts to me, if I  
Be fallen, or have lost my first esteem—  Alw. 
Oh pardon, t'other syllable of this destroys me;  
What is there, can but make me worthy of  
Your faith? I am all, ever thine? The Colonel.  Enter Colonel. Col. 
Expect a cloud to darken all your triumphs▪  Exit. Hon. 
His threats move me as little, as his love,  
Yet for thy sake I can be sad.  Alw. 
And I  
But only mourn for you.  Enter Colonel with a Pistol, and Travers. 
He is returned,  
And with him the first poisoner of our peace;  
What horror next?  Col. 
Your happiness is now  
Within your reach, kill but that fellow, and  
Possess her by my gift, the act once done  
By my command secures thee.  Hon. 
He shall make  
His passage to thee through my heart.  Tra. 
I thank you  
For your great promise and employment, Sir,  
But take your tool again,  Col. 
Did you not love her?  Tra. 
Yes infinitely, but scorn your Hangman's Office:  
I have done too much already; but if Madam,  
The memory of my base surprise have not  
Vveiged me down past all fathom of your mercy,  
I can ask you forgiveness in my heart,  
And suffer all his Tyranny, to expiate  
My black offence to you, and to that Gentleman.  Col. 
Are you so resolute?  Tra. 
Were I assured  
There were no punishment to attend this murde●  
Here, nor hereafter, could she pardon this  
Bloody assassination, and Alworth  
Forgive me, when his soul is gliding through  
The purple stream, and mounting up to fill  
Some happy star, would she herself consent  
To be the great reward of the black deed,  
I should abhor the Parricide.  Col. 
Is't so? expect my next return.  Exit: Alw. 
Sir, you have shown a penitence would strike  
A marble through, and this return to piety,  
Hath changed our anger into Admiration.  Hon. 
Sir, we have now no thoughts, but what are filled,  
With a desire you call us to your friendship;  
Live happy, and adorn by your example  
Of justice, the most honoured robe you wear.  Enter Colonel, Alamode, Fulbank, Squanderbag and Mammon. Col. 
Nay ye shall witness all my resolution;  
Your hand, dear Madam, Alworth take from me  
Thy own Honoria, it were impious  
To keep you a minute longer in your fears,  
Your loves deserve my admiration, not  
My anger, and I cheerfully resign  
All my ambitions, live you happy both▪  
As I am in this conquest of myself:  
I loved Honoria well, but justice better.  
But Madam, though you must be Alworth's Bride,  
Yet give me leave to call you Mistress, I  
Can be your servant still, and by your influence  
Upon me, steer my actions, and keep  
My passions in as much obedience,  
As any Soldier I command, and Alworth  
Be you so just, to tell the world that takes  
Delight to snarl, and catch at every error  
In our profession: I am no enemy  
To Arts, but can take pleasure to reward  
Learning, with all due honour, be yourself  
The example.  Alw. 
You are perfect  
In all that's noble, and it were a sin  
Not to proclaim it.  Tra. 
Sir, This act will crown  
Your name for ever.  Col. 
Make your peace with Honoria,  
'tis done, and we owe all we can call happy  
To your justice, Sir.  to Mammon. Col. 
Madam, you look upon us through some cloud,  
None should be worn this day, and here are some  
Did wear the title of your servant. Fulbank—  Ful. 
Oh you are truly noble, I ever honoured my Lady.  Col. 
Travers, Alamode,  Squa. 
Please you to name me in the list, I can  
Be as much a servant to this Lady, as  
The best of these.  Col. 
Stand forth, and plead your merits.  Mam. 
I excuse them,  
Your pardon Sir, I think the best in all the  
File unworthy of me.  Col. 
Plain truth, Gentlemen.  Mam. 
I could give reasons, but I have no humour  
To spoil some reputations in public.  Ala. 
I told you what a Gipsy ' 'twas.  Mam. 
Some may  
Traduce my fame, and charge me with a levity  
And frequent change, but I have been less constant,  
Because I found no man had wit enough  
To manage me, or worth enough to invite  
The stay of my affections. I acknowledge  
The Citizen doth promise fair, but breaks:  
Lawyers are cunning, but I love not snares:  
The Courtier has no care of his own body;  
The Countryman had no wit but in his acres:  
And for you, Sir, your name is Squanderbag,  
What would you do with Mammon, cannot keep her?  
Beside, these men had the bad luck to court me  
When I was swayed by an evil genius,  
Which now has left me. I see already  
A nobler path, and till I find a man  
Knows how to love, and govern me with temperance,  
I lay myself an humble servant at  
Honoria's feet; your pardon to my past  
Neglects, will make me cheerful to attend you.  Col. 
Nay, since you're come to be my fellow-servant,  
If you please, Madam, we may approach nearer;  
What think you of me, shall I present myself  
A servant to your favour?  Mam. 
Sir, you are pleasant.  Col. 
I shall be so, if you accept my service;  
Though I am a Soldier, I can love, and do  
All duties may become your worth and honour.  Mam. 
I blush to say how much I am unworthy,  
But I shall meet you honourably.  Col. 
A match, seal it.  Salute. Ful. 
He has done't it compendiously; But Sir, you know—  Col. 
Yes, I know very well what you would say,  
But this fair Lady's mine, and I'll deserve her:  
Wealth has already made you mad, we have been  
Out of the Sun a great while, I invite  
You all my guests to day, and Lady Mammon's,  
Do me that honour.  Ful. 
There is no remedy.  Enter Maslin stripped. Ala. 
'Tis well you scaped with loss of Mammon.  Col. 
What anti-Masquers this?  Mam. 
'Tis Mr. Maslin.  Cap. 
This fellow would not bend, and so they broke him.  Mas. 
You look like the Commander in chief  
Of this Militia.  Col. 
What then?  Mas. 
I have a suit to you.  Col. 
A suit? methinks you're naked.  Mas. 
I know not, but on my knees I beg their pardon  
That made me so, they plundered me so quaintly,  
They are the nimblest Hocus Pocus'  
That e'er threw dice for hemp.  Col. 
I am glad they fitted you.  Mas. 
No Sir, it was the Tailor fitted me.  Col. 
So, and they unfit you.  Mas. 
But with what art, how most compendiously  
They made me an Adamite, Sir—  Col. 
Let's hear your wonder.  Mas. 
One ill looked fellow did but swear an oath,  
And my hat flew up with the very wind of it,  
And fell upon a head, that stood bare for it  
Full three yards off:  
Another did but squint upon my legs,  
And my boots vanished with the spurs upon'em;  
Cloak, doublet, jerkin, all convenient broad cloth,  
Three pile of wool, went from me at one motion;  
No bars nor buttons could prevail a minute,  
They broke into my body with that nimble  
Burglary; I was undone ere I could wink:  
But when my narrow shirt came o'er my shoulders,  
I thoughted had been my skin, at every twitch  
I roared, and gave myself gone for a Rabbit  
For the next Officers supper.  Col. 
In good time.  Mas. 
But truth appeared when I was stripped, their charity  
Left me my breeches, but the good old gold  
Could not have leave to bear 'em company,  
That was defaulked miraculously by a Myrmidon  
That had lost both his hands—  Ala. 
Lost both his hands,  
How could he take your money?  Mas. 
With his stumps, Sir,  
He routed both my pockets with his stumps;  
Oh the knack some men have to fetch out money.  Col. 
He is pleasant, see his wardrobe be restored.  Mas. 
Shall I be warm again, Oh Madam—  Squa. 
Be not too saucy, she is now exalted  
Above your sphere.  Ful. 
Oh Mr. Maslin, we are all undone.  Mas. 
So am I, they have not left me a shirt.  Col. 
All faults, where we have power this day, are pardoned.  Ala. 
Happiness crown your loves!  Col. 
Now to the Priest,  
Whose work is only wanting to confirm us:  
Alworth, lead on your fairest Bride, remember  
We are both servants to Honoria.  Alw. 
To show I can obey you Sir, come Madam.  
The Birth of Heaven, and the Earth's Morningstar,  Col. 
Our life of Peace, and the true soul of  
War.  Exeunt. 
FINIS.    

THE CONTENTION OF AJAX and ULYSSES, FOR THE ARMOUR Of ACHILLES'.  
AS It was nobly represented by young Gentlemen of quality, at a private Entertainment of some persons of Honour.  
WRITTEN By JAMES SHIRLEY.  
LONDON, Printed for john Crook, at the sign of the ship in S. Paul's Churchyard.   


The Speakers.  
Ajax Telamonius.  
Ulysses.  
Agamemnon.  
Diomedes.  
Menelaus.  
Nestor.  
Calchas.  
Thersander.  
Polybrontes, a small Soldier.  
Lysippus Pages. Didimus  
Soldiers.  
Attendants.    

THE CONTENTION OF AJAX and ULYSSES FOR The ARMOUR Of ACHILLES'.  Didimus, Ulysses his Page, Lysippus, Ajax his Page. Di. 
WHy how now Insolence?  Lysippus justles Didimus. Ly. 
You know me Sir?  Di. 
For one that wants good manners; yes, I know  
Your name, and best relation, you attend  
A Page on Ajax Telamonius.  Ly. 
And you  
In such an office wait upon Ulysses,  
But with this 〈◊〉, that I am your better,  
In reference to my Lord, as he exceeds  
Your Master both in Fortitude and Honour:  
Therefore I take this boldness to instruct  
Your diminutive Worship in convenient duties,  
And that hereafter when you see me pass,  
You may descend, and vail, and know fit distance.  Dy. 
To you descend, and veil? to you? poor Rat!  
Is he not poisoned, that he swells so strangely:  
I would bestow this admonition, that  
You talk within your limits, I may find  
A pity for your folly, while you make  
Comparisons with me, but let your tongue  
Preserve a modesty, and not dare to name  
My Lord, without a reverence, and not  
In the same week your Master is in mention,  
Lest I chastise you.  Ly. 
Ha, ha, prodigy!  
The Monkey grin●, the Pigmy would be Rampant:  
Sirrah, 'tis I pronounce, if you have  
A mind to lose one of your lug●, or quit  
Some teeth that stick impertinent in your gums,  
Orrun the hazard of an eye, or have  
Your han hes ki kt into a gentle ●ullice,  
Or tell your Master in whose cause you have  
Deserved a cudgeling, and merited  
A crutch to carry home your broken body;  
Talk on, and when it is too late, you may  
R●pen● your impudence.  Di. 
Mighty man of 〈◊〉!  
Is not your name Lysippus? what mad Dog  
Has bid thee; thou art wild, hast lost thy senses?  Ly. 
You'll find, I have not.  Di. 
Is all this in earnest?  
And hast thou so much ignorance, to think  
That lump of flesh, thy Master (a thing meant  
By nature for a flail, and bang the sheaves)  
Is fit to be in competition  
With the wise Prince of Ithaca? whose name  
Shines like a Constellation throughout Greece,  
And is looked at with admiration  
By friends and enemies? for shame retract  
Thy gross opinion, it is possible  
Thou mayst retrieve thy lost wits,  Ly. 
Very well  
Then, you do think my little spawn of Policy,  
That your sly Master, the oyl-tongued Ulysses,  
Will win the prize to day, Achilles' Armour;  
And that the Kingly Judges, and grave Counsel  
Will give it against Ajax.  Di. 
In true wisdom,  
As to the best deserver.  They fight. Ly. 
Dandiprat.  Enter Calchas. Cal. 
Remove yourselves, and petty differences,  
This place is meant the scene for a contention  
Between the valiant Ajax Telamonius,  
And the far famed Ulysses, who shall best  
Me it to wear the great Achilles' Arms:  
Methinks I see Heavens mighty windows open,  
And those great souls, whom noble actions here  
Translated to take place among the Stars:  
Look down, and listen with much expectation  
Of this day's glory. The rough winds (lest they  
Should interrupt the plea of these Competitors)  
Stand close committed in their horrid caves,  
And habus dressed in all his brightest beams,  
Curbs in his Steeds to stay, to wait upon  
The great Decision.  
Silence, no noise profane this place, and may  
The soul of wisdom be at this great Council.  Enter Officers one after another, bearing the Pieces of Achilles' Armour, after them in state, Agamemnon, Nestor, Menelaus, Diomedes, Thersander, etc. Aga. 
I need not, Grecian Princes, spend much time  
Or Language, in discousing the occasion  
Why this great Council hath been called; Achilles,  
Whose very name will be enough to fill  
The breath of fame, is here again concerned,  
Nor can his honoured ashes be without  
Contention in his sacred Urn, until  
The difference between these great Competitors  
Be reconciled.  Cap. 
They both, great Agamemnon, are prepared,  
And cheerful, as when Honour called them forth  
To fight, impatient of delay, or danger.  Ag. 
Attend them hither,  Dio. 
Let the Officers  
Take care the Soldiers press not past their limit.  Enter before Ajax, his Page, bearing his Target. Ajax. 
appears, with lightning in his eyes,  
His big heart seems to boil with rage.  My. 
He was ever passionate:  
Here comes Ulysses.  Enter Ulysses, with his Page, as before, he makes obeisance, and sets down in a Chair. 
A man of other temper, and as far  
From being transported with unhandsome anger,  
He seems to smile.  Ag. 
They have both deserved  
For their great service in this expedition,  
We should with calm, and most impartial souls  
Hear and determine; therefore, if you please,  
Because the hours are precious, I shall  
Desire them lose no time.  Dio. 
We all submit, and shall obey your prudence.  Ag. 
You honour much:  
Your Agamemnon— Princes then to you,  
I hope you have brought hither, with your persons,  
Nothing but what your honours may consent too;  
Speak yourselves freely then, these are your Judges▪  
Who are not only great in birth and titles,  
And therefore bring no thoughts to slain their honour,  
But bound by obligation of one Country,  
Will love, and do your name and valour's justice.  
There lies your great reward, Achilles' Arms,  
Forged by the subtle art of him, that framed  
Ioves Thunderbolts, pride of Cyclopian labours,  
He that is meant by his kind stars, to have  
The happy wearing of them next, may write  
Himself a Champion for the Gods, and Heaven,  
Against a race of Giants that would scale it:  
I have said, and we with silence now as deep  
As that doth wait on midnight, and as fixed  
As marble Images, expect your pleasure.  Ajax riseth and looks about him. Ajax. 
Great jove, immure my heart, or gift it with  
Some ribs of steel, lest it break through this flesh,  
And with a flame contracted from just fury,  
Set fire on all the world: How am I fall?  
How shrunk to nothing? my fame ravished from me?  
That this sly talking Prince is made my Rival  
In great Achilles' Armour: Is it day?  
And can a Cloud darker than night, so muffle  
Your eyes, they cannot reach the Promontory,  
Beneath which now the Grecian fleet rides safe,  
Which I so late rescued from Trojan flames,  
When Hector frightful, like a Globe of fire,  
By his example taught the enraged youth  
To brandish lightning; but I cannot talk,  
Nor knows he how to fight, unless i'th' dark  
With shadows. I confess, his eloquence  
And tongue are mighty, but Pelides sword  
And armour were not made things to be talked on,  
But worn and used, and when you shall determine  
My juster claim, it will be fame enough  
For him, to boast, he strove with Ajax Telamonius.  
And lost the prize, due only to my merit.  Ly. 
Now Didimus, how goes Ulysses pulse?  
Run to his Tent, and fetch him some strong waters.  Did. 
This storm shakes not a leaf, it had been more  
Honour for Ajax Telamonius to have hired  
A Trumpeter, than make this noise himself.  Ag. 
Silence.  
The Duke proceeds.  Aja. 
I am ashamed  
And blush, that I can plead so vast a marit:  
Why am I not less honourable? a cheaper  
Portion of worth, weighed in the balance, with  
This Rival, would so crowd, and fill my scale,  
His virtues, like a thin and trembling vapour,  
Would lose themselves i'th' air, or stick a Comet  
Upon Heaven's face, from whence the matter spent,  
It would fall down, the sport▪ and scorn of Children,  
Allow me then less valiant, pinch all  
The Laurels from my brow, that else would grow there,  
The honour of my birth and blood must lift me  
Above the Competition with Ulysses;  
My Father was Duke Telamonius, a name  
Fatal to Troy, companion to Alcides,  
Whom in the expedition to Colchos,  
Argo was proud to bear: his father Aeacus,  
Who for his exemplary justice here,  
Was by Eternal Patent from the Gods,  
Made Judge of souls; him jupiter begot  
On fair Egina, from whose womb, I write  
Myself a third from jove: But let not this  
Entitle me to great Achilles' arms,  
Without my interest in his blood: Our fathers  
Grew from one royal stem, I am his Kinsman,  
And I demand in this, but just inheritance.  
In what relation of blood can then  
Ulysses. of a strange and forfeit race,  
Equal in fraud to his Progenitor,  
Condemned to labour at the restless stone,  
Lay claim to Achilles' Arms?  Cal. 
What, asleep Thersander?  Ther. 
No, no, I observe every word, Ulysses has  
Said very well, he was ever a good Orator.  Cal. 
You are mistaken, Sir, 'tis Ajax pleads,  
Ulysses has not spoke one word.  Th. 
Wast Ajax?  
I cry you mercy, it was very handsome,  
And to the purpose in my opinion,  
Who ever said it.  Ag. 
I entreat your silence.  The. 
With all my heart.  Aja. 
It is wonder Princes,  
That this Dulichyan King dare bring his face  
Before a Sunbeam, and expose that brand  
Of infamy, the name of Coward, writ  
In Leprous Characters upon his brow,  
To the world's eye.  Ul. 
How Telamonius?  Aja. 
Ulysses,  
'Tis I, that said it, and these Kings may all  
Remember, when most wretchedly, to save  
Those tender limbs of yours, and that warped face,  
When Greece rise up, one man to punish Troy,  
Thou cowardly didst counterfeit a madness,  
Till Palamedes pulled that vizor off.  
Was Ajax Telamonius at that sordid posture?  
Nay, was not I the first in field, and eager  
To engage my person in these Wars of Troy?  
(Witness thou sacred Genius of our Country)  
As a curled youth could fly to meet a Mistress,  
And print his fervour on her amorous lip:  
But for his valour since, let Nestor speak;  
That good old man made not his age excuse,  
Nor his white hairs, that like a Grove of snow,  
Showed what a Winter dwelled upon his head,  
But flung himself on War, when in the heat  
Of Battel, overcharged with multitudes,  
And his horse wounded, he espied Ulysses,  
To whom in this distress, he called for succour,  
When he (unworthy of his name and honours)  
Left the old man to struggle with his dangers,  
To whom the Gods sent aid. But here's the justice,  
He that dishonourably forsook his friend,  
Met with an enemy, that made him call  
As loud for his relief; I heard that clamour,  
And with my sword cut out my passage to thee,  
When thou wert quaking at the enemy's feet,  
And ready to exhale thy panting soul,  
I interposed, bestrid thy coward body,  
And took thy many deaths upon my Target:  
I Ajax brought thee off (my least of honours)  
And saved thy wretched life.  Dio. 
This Ajax did,  
But being done, the honour's over paid,  
When he that did the act is Commentator.  Aja. 
If thou couldst call again that time crosses,  
The wounds upon thee, and thy fears of death,  
When thou didst skulk behind my shield, and tremble  
At every lightning of a sword, thy soul  
Would have a less ambition to contest  
For great Pelides Arms.  Me. 
Ajax will carry it.  Aga. 
It will  
Become our prudence to expect, what may  
Be said in answer to this accusation;  
I have heard an Orator, with that subtle method  
Of art and language, state his Client's cause,  
And with such captivating arguments  
Prevailed on every ear, it was concluded,  
All law must be in favour of that interest,  
But when the adverse part was heard, that which  
Appeared so sacred in the first relation,  
Vanished, and 'twas the wonder of all men,  
By what strange magic they were so deceived:  
I speak not this in prejudice of him  
That pleads, whom we all know a man made up  
Of every masculine virtue, but to stay  
(Where two of so much honour are concerned)  
Precipitate, and partial votes of merit:  
Ajax Has more to say.  Aja. 
I know not how, with safety of mine own,  
I should direct your judgements to consider,  
That after all this story of myself,  
I do not seek these arms, nor court the glory  
To wear 'em, for 'tis justice to pronounce  
They seek me, Ajax, and should prompt you to  
Believe, I only worthily can wear 'em.  
What hath Ulysses done, he should be named  
With Telamonius; we have his Chronicle,  
He surprised Rhesus in his Tent, a great  
And goodly act, nay, had the heart to kill him;  
He snatched a spy up, Dolon, and dispatched him  
To the other world, a most heroic service!  
And had the confidence to filch from Troy,  
The dead Palladium, memorable actions:  
Fought he with Hector? did he stand immoved  
As I, when I received upon my cask,  
A mighty Javelin that he darted at me?  
When you, pale with the wonder of my strength,  
Forsook your prayers, and gave me from the Gods  
Into my own protection, and at last  
I was not overcome, but in the face  
Of both the Armies, sent this mighty Champion  
Staggering home to Troy.  Nes. 
'Twas a fierce battle,  
And Aax lost no honour.  Aja. 
Had I done  
But this alone, it might be argument  
To prefer Ajax lelamon before  
Ulysses to that armour; which I'●n thinking  
How he'll become, or how he dare sustain 'em,  
Their very weight will crack his chine, that Burgonet  
Will bring his neck in danger of a cramp,  
In pity of his fears, discharge his hope  
Of so much steel, he has the art of running,  
'Twill much reta d his motion: Are you yet  
Considering as doubtful to distinguish us?  
Some God convey those arms up ●n the wings  
Of a swift wind into he enemy's camp,  
Guard'em with all the strength and soul of Troy,  
Let every sword mount death upon the point,  
And leave us to our single fate, who soon  
Should fetch 'em off: Then you should tell yourselves,  
How much this Carpet Prince came short of Ajax,  
I had rather fight than talk: Now hear him tattle.  Soul. 
a Ajax, a Ajax  Ulys. 
If my prayers, with your own, renowned Kings,  
Could have prevailed with Heaven, there had been no  
Contention for these arms, he might have lived  
To have enjoyed them still, and we Achilles.  
But since by the unkindeness of our fate,  
We are decreed to want him (pardon me  
If at that word, unmanly tears break forth)  
Who can with greater merit claim the armour,  
Than he whose piety to Greece and you,  
Engaged alone his valour to these Wars,  
And made him yours. Nor let it be a sin  
Ere I proceed, to pray this justice from you,  
That since my adversary hath been pleased  
To make a virtue my reproach, and slain  
The name of Eloquence, which in me, is not worth  
Your envy, or his rage (since he declares  
His incapacity for more than fight)  
You will not judge his dulness an advantage,  
Or that which he calls eloquence in me,  
A blemish to my cause, who have employed  
All that the Gods made mine, to serve my Country.  Dio. 
Thersander,  
Are you not ashamed to sleep?  Ther. 
Ha? no, I sleep?  
I have not scaped a syllable by my honour,  
I thought not Ajax half so good an Orator.  Dio. 
Ajax? it was Ulysses that spoke last.  Ther. 
Ulysses? ay, I meant Ulysses; did I say Ajax?  
Between you and I be it spoken Diomedes,  
Ajax is a blockhead.  Dio. 
Yet he spoke to purpose.  Ther. 
I grant you that; nay, nay, let him alone.  Aga. 
Silence.  Ulys. 
The lustre of our birth by Ajax boasted,  
Which we derive not from our act or virtue,  
We vainly call our own, nature contributes  
A common gloss to all our blood, the honours  
And swelling titles, pinned upon our name,  
Chance often stamps upon a Fool or Coward:  
But if provoked by Ajax, I must yield  
Him magnified by blood; that title which  
He takes from jove, makes me his Grandchild too,  
Lacrtes was my father; his Arcesius,  
Whom jupiter begot, no difference here,  
But that our Family contained no Uncle  
Banished for murder, as in Telamon's.  
Besides, my mother but remembered, makes  
My derivation on both sides Divine,  
Which lifts me above Ajax, if I were  
No King of Ithaca: but he hath pleaded  
A nearer privilege by being Kinsman,  
And calls these arms his just inheritance,  
Your wisdom could not choose but smile to he●● him,  
〈◊〉 his son is yet alive, and Peleus,  
Achilles' father, Teucer his next Cousin; ●  
And Ajax to be heir, is worth your wonder;  
But you know how to wave impertinence  
〈…〉  
I need to pray your justice, that we both  
May only charge the balance with our merits.  Dio. 
This is not ranting, he is Master of A worthy temper.  Ag. 
Give him your permissions.  Ulys. 
Ajax hath read, not without mighty lungs,  
His own bold History, when I shall tell  
But my first act for Troy, if it be less  
Than all that Ajax yet hath done, or boasted,  
And with his own consent too, I quit all:  
I have raised your expectations up to wonder,  
And there I'll fix it, when I name Achilles,  
Whose actions for your service, scorning all  
Equality, are owing to Ulysses;  
And I may call them mine, that made him yours,  
By his sword fell the great Priamides  
Hoctor, whose single arm carried the strength  
And fate of Ilium: The death alone  
Of Hector, is an act, if well considered,  
Doth easily exceed, what hath been done  
In all your Grecian Commentaries: I armed  
Achilles first to do these mighty things,  
And for those may deserve Achilles' armour,  Dio. 
We must acknowledge all the benefits  
Of great Achilles' valour are a debt  
We owe to Ulysses, who discovered him  
Under a Female habit, 'twas Ulysses  
That made him man again, and our great Champion.  Me. 
All this is granted, yet I think Ulysses  
Lost little blood in any of these services;  
What do you think Thersander?  Ther. 
I think as the General thinks, he's wise enough.  Ulys, 
But give me leave to offer to your memory  
Another service, and reduce your thoughts  
To Aulis, when our Army shipped, and big  
With our desires for Troy, for want of wind  
Were locked in the Eubean Bay at Anchor.  
When the Oracle consulted, gave no hope  
Of the least breath of Heaven, or gentle gale  
To be expected, till Diana's anger  
Were first appeased by Iphigenias' blood;  
I melt with the remembrance, and I could  
Accuse my faith, but that the public interest  
And all your honours, armed me to persuade  
Nature, against the stream of her own happiness,  
There stands the tear— drowned father Agamemnon,  
Ask his vexed soul (and let me beg his pardon)  
How I did work upon his murmuring heart,  
Divided 'twixt a Father and his Country,  
To give his child up to the bleeding altar?  
Whose drops (too precious to enrich the earth,  
The Goddess hid within a cloud) drank up,  
And snatched her soul; whose brighter substance made  
One of the fairest Stars that deck yond Canopy.  
Had Ajax been employed to have wrought Atrides  
When he was angry with the Gods, to have given  
His only pledge, his loved Iphigenia  
Up to the Fatal knife, our Grecian fleet,  
Had by this time been rotten in the Bay,  
And we by a dishonourable return,  
Been wounded in our fames to after ages.  Ag. 
This truth is urged too home.  Ul. 
The Deity appeased with Virgin Sacrifice,  
The winds put on fresh wings, and we arrived  
Swi●● 〈◊〉 wishes to affrighted Troy;  
〈◊〉 after their first battle, they no more  
Drawn forth their Army, which engaged us to  
Nine horrid Winter's expectation:  
It would be tedious to relate, how active  
My counsels were, during this nine years' siege,  
When Ajax (only good at knocks and wrestling)  
Was of no use, the bold designs I carried,  
My care of our defences and approaches,  
Encouraging the Soldier, wearied  
And worn away with empty expectations,  
How I did apt provisions, arms, and hearts  
To fight withal, I shall not here enforce,  
When you whose just commands I still obeyed,  
Are conscious of my pious undertake.  Aja. 
He'll talk eternally.  Ul. 
These actions have deserved no brand of Coward,  
How it may slain his forehead that accused me,  
Judge you, by the short following story, Princes  
There was a time, when Agamemnon was  
Deluded by a dream, and bid to leave  
The siege, which coming to the Soldier's ear,  
(Whose fears were helped by superstition)  
How did they run toth' ships from every quarter:  
Where was the torrent of great Ajax valour  
So talked of, that did bear all things before it?  
Why, it was here, that torrent carried him too:  
I see and blushed at Ajax preparation  
To be aboard, (I will not call it running)  
How 〈◊〉 I, careless of all danger, throw  
Myself among the Mutineers, and court  
The Fugitives to face about again,  
And build themselves a name, and wealth in Troy,  
Given over by the Gods to be their captive?  
What acted Telamonius, but unworthy fears,  
And rather coward them by his retreat,  
Than teach them honour by his own example.  Aja. 
Can jove hear this? ha!  Ag. 
Look to Ajax.  Nes. 
Contain yourself.  Aja. 
Let me fight him here,  
Or you are all confederates in my infamy.  Nes. 
For my sake.  Aja. 
I am patient—  Ul. 
Nor am I without wounds, and crimson characters,  
Which as her ornament, my bosom carries,  
Greater than Telamonius can boast, although  
He fought with Hector, which was but his Fortune,  
And might have been the lot of Agamemnon,  
Of Menelaus, Diomedes, myself,  
And others, who had equally engaged,  
And only chance preferred him to the combat:  
But let me not be thought to take from Ajax  
His just reward of fortitude, I grant  
He did repress the fury of the Trojans,  
When they came armed in fires against our Navy,  
But 'twas nor single valour, that repulsed  
The numerous enemy. Patroclus' had  
The armour of Achilles on that day,  
Which struck a terror in the Phrygian courages,  
And many Prince's swords contributed,  
Mine was not idle, and I merit some  
Proportion of fame for that days victory;  
But if it come with murmuring, defer it,  
And make it up in your accounts of honour  
Due, for the great Palladium, which I fetched  
(Assisted by the valiant Diomedes)  
Out of the heart of Troy, spite of the Groves  
Of Spears, that grew a bright defence about it,  
And Swords, whose every motion darted lightning  
To guard the fatal Image; in this act  
I gave you Troy, till this was ravished from 'em,  
It was not in your fate to make a conquest,  
Ajax and all the Army might have fought  
Against the Moon, with as much hope of Victory.  Dio. 
This must be granted him a signal Service,  
I can attest the danger of this action.  Ul. 
I blush, I am compelled to mention these,  
But where my honour is traduced, 'tis just  
To make my fairest vindication:  
The wealth of Greece should not have bribed me to  
This Contestation; but Achilles' armour  
Would strike ambitious thoughts into a Hermit,  
Nor will my limbs much tremble to sustains 'em  
I had the honour at his death, to carry  
His body with all that weight of arms upon it,  
And placed him in his Tent, although I want  
Some bulk of Ajax, I can walk, and fight,  
And tell him where he fails, and mark him out  
A truer path to Glory, than his strength  
Is able to pursue, with no more brains  
To guide him, than his empty pannier carries:  
Wisemen join policy with force, the Lion  
Thus with the Fox, makes up the Soldier's emblem.  
And now I look on Ajax Telamonius,  
I may compare him to some specious building,  
His body holds vast rooms of entertainment,  
And lower parts maintain the Offices,  
Only the Garret, his exalted head,  
Useless for wise receipt, is filled with lumber,  
A Mastiff dares attempt to combat Lions,  
And I'll find men among your Mercenaries  
Shall fly on Hydra's, if you name that valour:  
But he, that we call valiant indeed,  
Knows how, and when to fight, as well as bleed.  A great shout within. Sol. 
Ulysses, Ulysses.  Ag. 
Please you withdraw your persons for some minutes,  Aja. 
Is't come to this.  Ul. 
I obey.  Aja. 
I scorn to court  
Such staggering opinions, and repent  
That I once thought you fit to be my Judges.  Ex. Ther. 
For my part, with pardon of the General,  
My voice shall be to please them both.  Ag. 
Impossible.  Ther. 
Divide the armour, and compose the difference;  
Or give Ulysses, 'cause he has the better  
Head-piece, Achilles' Helmet; and to Ajax,  
Those parts that guard the body.  Dio. 
I am for  
Ulysses.  Ne. 
He shall have my vote.  Me. 
And mine.  Ag. 
Your judgements meet with Agamem●nons,  
Entreat the Prince of Ithaca return.  Enter Ulysses. Aga. 
Sir I congratulate your fate, you have  
With the concurrence of our votes, deserved  
To be the second owner of these arms;  
Which as the first reward of all your service,  
I in their names present: Nor are these Trophies  
More than an earnest, and a glimpse, of those  
Eternal Monuments shall Crown your Wisdom;  
where's Ajax Telomon?  Off. 
Transported hence with fury.  Ulyss. 
You have honoured your Ulysses, and I now  
Must call these things my blessing, and your bounty.  Aga. 
Bear them in Triumph to his Tent, and say,  
Wisdom, not downright Valour wins the day;  
Better is wise Ulysses in the field,  
Than the great Master of the sevensold Shield.  Exeunt. Didimus, Lysippus. Did. 
I think Lysippus, we may now be friends,  
For though you had a mind to quarrel when  
The victory was doubtful, I am not  
The more exalted for my Master's triumph,  
His wit is none of mine; I honour Ajax  
In his own arms; for I have seen him do  
Brave things.  Ly. 
Thy hand, I love thee Didimus,  
And I will love Ulysses for thy sake too.  Did. 
But how does thy Lord Ajax take the business?  Ly. 
He's mad, and rails at heaven and earth, I dare not  
Come near him— Whos's this, Poiybrontes?  Enter Polybrontes. 
Let us forget all differences, and make  
Some sport with him— Polybrontes,  
I am proud to see your military face.  Did. 
My Magazine of Valour, I do honour you,  
From that exalted trust upon your Sconce,  
To the cold iron Star upon your heel, how is't?  Ly. 
How is't my Low, and Mighty Polybrontes?  Pol. 
Tired out with killing of the Creature,  
Wild Beasts, and Men, will come into my way;  
Some, I look dead, others I take the pains  
To cut or quarter, as they move my fury,  
The hate of juno is entailed upon  
Our generation I think.  Did. 
How, juno? I pray what kin are you to Hercules?  Pol. 
I am his son, son to the Theban Hercules  
That did the mighty Labours; we number twelve,  
I have been told too, I am very like him;  
There were fifty of us in one night begotten.  Did. 
You are not, Sir, so big boned as Hercules altogether.  Pol. 
Hang bones, and flesh, and blood,  
It is the soul that's tall, a Giant's spirit.  Ly. 
Not in that body,  
A soul can hardly stand upright in't.  Pol. 
'Tis the more dangerous, being confined, and must  
Break out like lightning.  Did. 
What's that upon your hat?  Pol. 
My case of Toothpicks.  Ly. 
How, 'tis a Lion's paw.  Pol. 
A Legacy my father left me, part  
Of that Nemean Lion, that he killed,  
Whose skin he used to wear, which since these Wars  
I turned into a Knapsack, and it carries  
A charm against all venomous Beasts, come near it,  Did. 
Vermine he means:  
What kind of belt is this?  Pol. 
This was a Serpent, which at Aulis was  
Obse●●d to climb up to the Sparrows nest,  
Where having swallowed nine, Calchas presaged,  
We should be nine years at the siege of Troy,  
And in the tenth be Conqueros, this I killed  
With a Flint stone, as it came hissing toward me,  
It had ten row of iron teeth.  Did. 
Where are they?  Pol. 
All beaten out with that stone I threw at her.  Did. 
Nothing escapes you then:  
But good Sir favour us, to let us know  
How many men have fallen by your sword  
During our siege, I know you keep a Catalogue.  Pol. 
Not of all,  
I only register within my Diary,  
The men of honour that I kill, the rest  
I leave to the common bills of Mortality.  Ly. 
The men of honour, I pray, Sir.  Pol. 
They rise to—  
too in my roll.  Did. 
With your own hand?  Pol. 
Ten Princes, beside two of Priam's sons,  
Parish and Hector,  Ly. 
Paris is alive.  Pol. 
Not that Paris I killed upon my honour.  Did. 
And all the Army knows, Achilles with  
His Myrmidons slew Hector.  Pol. 
From me tell Achilles  
'Tis false.  Ly. 
He's dead too.  Pol. 
'Tis well he is so, he that steals my fame,  
Must not be long i'th' number of the living.  Did. 
You are  
The little wonder of the world, you had  
Done yourself right, to have put in with Ulysses  
And Ajax, for the armour.  Ly. 
Had he stood,  
There had been no Competitor, Ulysses  
Had this day missed his triumph.  Pol. 
Had Ulysses  
The armour then?  Enter Ajax. Ly. 
Given by all Judges.  Pol. 
I believe  
The man is so modest, ●at mention  
Of me, would have recanted his ambition;  
Do not I know Ulysses? yes, and Ajax.  Ana. 
Ha!  Pol. 
And all the swelling flies that blow the Army,  
I'll tell that Ajax, when I see him next,  
That I dare fight?  Aja. 
With whom Sir, dare you fight?  Pol. 
With any man that shall affront you, Sir,  
Renowned Ajax, my soul falls to crumbs  
That day, I do not honour your remembrance.  
Ulysses is a Juggler, I do wonder  
At's impudence, to stand in competition  
With him, that is the man of men, brave Telamonius:  
Shall I carry him a challenge; prithee let me,  
I long to thunder him.  Aja. 
Stay Wesel!  Pol. 
Or to Agamemnon, or the best of them,  
Would I were in my knapsack nibbling cheese now.  Aja. 
I say the word, be dead.  Ajax strikes him. Pol. 
My brains, my brains!  
Ah my own sweet brains; who wants any brains?  Aja, 
Art thou not dead?  Pol. 
Oh yes Sir, I am dead,  
Give my Ghost leave to walk a little.  Aja. 
Come back, your name?  Pol. 
Ah, when I was alive, the Soldiers called me—  Aja. 
Agamemnon.  Pol. 
I shall be brained in earnest!  Aja. 
When thou hast passed the Stygian Lake, commend me  
To Aeacus, one of the Infernal Judges.  Pol. 
I will Sir, I am acquainted with his Clark.  Aja. 
And when I have made my revenge perfect,  
I'll visit him myself.  Pol. 
I'll bring you an answer too.  Aja. 
Do so.  Pol. 
I were best to make haste, Sir, Charon stays for me,  
And I shall lose my tide.  Aja. 
Then vanish.  Pol. 
Presto.  Exit. Aja. 
There's one dispatched, he's company for Ghosts,  
I know whose fate is next, and then I leap  
To immortality: what cloud is that  
Descends so big with prodigy, my steel  
Shall give the Monster birth, ha' 'tis Ulysses,  
Come to affront me in Achilles' armour:  Enter Calchas. 
A thousand serpents creep within my skull:  
I'll find the Coward's soul through all this darkness,  
Have at thee Politician, dost thou bleed?  
Now I have met wi'ye, thanks to my good sword,  
I kiss thy cold lips, for this brave revenge,  
Thou art my own, without competitor,  
And must be my last refuge and companion.  Cal. 
Alas poor Telamonius!  Aja. 
Who calls Telamonius?  Cal. 
One you have known and loved; can you forget  
Calchas so soon?  Aja. 
Our Grecian Prophet, you are very welcome,  
What news from the upper World? do they agree  
In heaven? we are all to pieces.  Cal. 
I am trusted  
With a direction to you, the sacred powers  
You serve—  Aja, 
Speak on, but let me tell you as a friend,  
They have not used me kindly, but no matter,  
I'll be my own revenger.  Cal. 
Sir, take heed.  
How you provoke their anger, or contemn  
Their Precepts, for the partial acts of men,  
They know, and pity that a man so valiant,  
Should for a trifle lose his manly temper:  
You are not, Sir, forgotten by the Gods  
And I am sent, their Prophet to acquaint you,  
That what you lost alive by humane Judges,  
Their divine Justice shall restore with honour  
To your calm dust; for know, those very arms  
In which Ulysses triumphs now, shall be  
Snatched from him by a tempest, and shall land  
A floating treasure upon Ajax Tomb,  
And by their stay convince the future age,  
Who best deserved 'em; be not then unmanned,  
And thus deface the beauties of your reason.  Aja. 
I thank 'em, they are pleased, when I am dead  
To make a restitution to my fame,  
And send me home the armour, this is something,  
I'll make myself in a capacity  
By death to be an object of their justice,  
I'll die immediately, I can do't myself.  Cal. 
Your Piety avert so black a deed!  
This is a way to make the world suspect  
The worth of all your former actions,  
And that they were not births Legitimate,  
Born from true honour, but the spurious issue  
Of an ung ided heat, or chance: How shall  
We think, that man is truly valiant,  
And fit to be engaged in things of fright  
And danger, that wants courage to sustain  
An injury? it shows a fear of others,  
To be revenged upon ourselves, and he  
Is not so much a Coward that flies death,  
As he that suffers, and doth fear to live:  
Besides, this will enlarge your enemy's triumph,  
And in the world opinions, be granted  
A tame concession to his worth; nay men,  
And with much face of reason, may affirm,  
Ulysses did not only win the arms,  
〈…〉 Ajax.  〈◊〉 
Therefore I will die  
With 〈◊〉 own hand, and save that infamy;  
I am resolved, all fate shall not prevent it:  
Leave me:  Col. 
I must not.  Ana. 
I am not confined  
To place, thy office yet is thy protection,  
Do not presume to follow, left my rage  
Make me forget your person, and by sad  
Mistake, I turn the Priest into a Sacrifice:  
Go tell the world I am dead, and make it known,  
That Ajax fell by no hand but his own.  Cal. 
This will turn all our Triumph into mourning,  Exeunt.  
Calchas before the body of Ajax, supported by six Princes, Agamemnon, Diomedes, Menelaus, Thersander, Nestor, Ulysses, following the Hearse, as going to the Temple. Ca, 

The glories of our blood and state,  
are shadows, not substantial things,  
There is no armour against fate,  
Death lays his icy hand on Kings,  
Sceptre and Crown,  
Must tumble down,  
And in the dust be equal made,  
With the poor crooked scythe and spade,   

Some men with swords may reap the field,  
and plant fresh laurels where they kill,  
But their strong nerves at last must yield,  
They tame but one another still;  
Early or late,  
They stoop to fate,  
And must give up their murmuring hreath,  
When they pale Captives creep to death.   

The Garlands wither on your brow,  
Then boast no more your mighty deeds,  
Upon Death's purple Altar now,  
See where the Victor-victim bleeds,  
Your beads must come,  
To the cold Tomb,  
Only the actions of the just  
Smell sweet, and blossom in their dust.   [This was afterwards sung in parts, the Music excellently composed by Mr. Ed. Coleman.] Ag. 
Set forward to the Temple, this was once  
A day of Triumph, but the death of Ajax  
Will make it dark within our Calendar;  
Joys are abortive, or not born to last,  
And our bright days are quickly overcast.  Exeunt. 
FINIS.