Integration 2


More Than Capable

In my time here at Notre Dame, I have encountered many different things. Some of
those things being good and some bad with the majority of it being good. In week 9 we
talked about encountering dissonance. Particularly, this dissonance for me came in a
form of Imposter Syndrome and the internal battle that takes place in our minds. The
first time I remember encountering Imposter Syndrome relative to Notre Dame was
when I was applying to get into the University. It gave me negative thoughts like “Am I
smart enough to go here” or “Theirs no way I even get accepted”. With that being said
obviously, I was accepted but that’s when the real Imposter Syndrome came. In week 9
Elizabeth Cox in her video “ What is Imposter Syndrome” said something that was
unbelievably relatable to me. She said, “ Some thought that their acceptance was an
admission error”. I actually laughed at this quote when I first heard it because this was
me. When I found out that I was accepted into such a prestigious university I
immediately thought that this had to have been some sort of error on the university.
Relative to my time here, a couple of weeks ago I turned in an essay for my western
civilizations class and got a 90 as a grade. My academic counselor was very happy
about this but unfortunately, my Imposter syndrome kicked in and said that “it was
probably a mistake” followed by “I got lucky”. Through this course, I have learned that I
am not the only one that battles these thoughts. I saw this clearly when other people
were raising their hands and talking about their own experiences. A strategy I will
implement in the next semester will be immediately fighting the syndrome with positive
self talk a skill I learned from some of the older guys that helped them get through their
times here at Notre Dame. There were all kinds of different ideas for self-talk but the
one that stuck out to me using a rubberband I have on my rest snapping it and then
saying something positive about myself and or something positive about my ability and I
have found this to be very helpful. I believe if I continue doing that, there will be no room
left for Imposter syndrome.

In week 10 when we discussed encountering brokenness. For me personally, I
encountered this 2 different times and they both were equally as bad. The first being the
2 weeks that I was in quarantine. The worst time of my life. It was bad because not only
was I sick, I was alone and the thing that hurt most was I had to watch the team play 2
full games and I didn’t get to be a part of it at all not even.. Not even on the sideline. The
second time was when I was in my dorm room and the realization that I was going to be
553 miles away from the people I love. That feeling that suddenly hit me broke my heart
and crushed my spirits. Looking back on that it’s interesting because college was
something I used to dream about. I knew before that there was a way to recover from
this and now being out of that isolation I know that the way I recovered is key and could
benefit others as well and not only myself. In the video, Kirsten Hegelson mentions that
she experienced healing by repairing broken pottery. She also says “That they learn that



the things they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly — it has made them this
beautiful, dynamic, interesting person they are today.” For me personally, I experience
that same healing from God. Through this course, I've learned hat reading the Bible or
watching Steven Furtick or Micahel Tood's YouTube videos can help me respond to and
recover from brokenness. When I think back on the times I did and didn't do those
things, I realize that they allowed me to experience healing in a far more deep way
when I did.

In week 11 we discuss ecountering community. I have encountered a sense of
community through 3 new friends I made who are on the football team. They are now
some of my closest friends. I have also made some friends in this community who aren’t
on the sports team that have been really nice and helpful to me. For example my
roommate has been really thoughtful and also given me some ways to improve my
essay. “Change is difficult but more possible when we see and hear multiple voices.” I
thinks this quote is great and it makes me realize why I enjoy being around those four
guys. Their names are Kahanu, Barret, and Davis. We are all from all over the country
and kahuna is from hawaii. This allows all kinds of different opinions, lifestyles, and
conversations to take place which results in us growing deeper bonds and connections.
Reflecting on this, next semester my goal is to try and open myself up more in the
community and try to connect with new people and hopefully becomes friends.

In week 12 we talk about encountering hope. I encountered hope many times this
year and it’s through God. Knowing and believing that I am never alone and that he is
always by my side. For example when I was in quarantine It was a time when I
encounter hope because although I wasn’t able to plays those 2 games. I knew that
because of God things were going to better in the end. I am a firm believer in everything
happening for a reason. I know it happened for a reason and something great is going
to come from it.  “ Our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer
desiring, but still intending, to do our Enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from
which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken,
and still obeys”. This quote proves my point because even though things aren’t going
my way all the time. I still have hope in Gods plans for me. I have learned through this
class that being hopeful is something that I need to continue to do to keep my spirts and
in the future I plan to focus on being full of hope everyday.

Video: "What is Imposter Syndrome?" (Elizabeth Cox, TED-Ed) Moreau FYE Week 9 )

Video :“Women Find Healing Through Kintsugi Workshop” ( Grotto) Moreau FYE Week
10)

"Diversity Matters
(Links to an external site.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQUxL4Jm1Lo
https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436
https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436


!" (Prof. Agustin Fuentes) - Moreau FYE Week 11)

( "The Screwtape Letters" Chapter 8
Download "The Screwtape Letters" Chapter 8
(C.S. Lewis) -  Moreau FYE Week 12 )

https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826?wrap=1
https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826/download?download_frd=1
https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826/download?download_frd=1