My Bright Horizon: How I Have & Will Continue to Respond to Changes in My Life

After almost an entire semester of college, I can definitively say that it was not what I was expecting. Granted, I didn’t come in with many expectations, but I think the most shocking difference between high school and college was the amount of new freedom. This freedom has definitely led to late nights of procrastination and forgetting to do simple tasks like laundry or going to dinner. However, I know that these past 3 months have helped me grow in different ways and allowed me to respond to change with a new perspective. Along the way, I have encountered different life issues, and the way in which I have responded to such has helped me better understand myself. 
Am I doing something that I truly want to be doing? This is a question that I knew the answer to in high school: no. Many of the activities and groups that I was involved in were simply resume-builders. I knew what my short-term goal was: get into a good college. And I did. Unfortunately, I am now not sure what direction to head in. With expectations from my parents, siblings, and friends back home, it is difficult to truly explore different areas of study. However, as Julia Hogan said, “Not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you. You can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. When you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” ("Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit" by Julia Hogan - Moreau FYE Week Nine). With this in mind, I was able to accept the fact that I had to drop out of a class and knew that my potential majors might be changing. At the beginning of the year, my Notre Dame Introduction sounded something like this: “Hi! I’m . I live in Johnson Family Hall, and I will be majoring in Finance and Political Science.” I was wrong! Upon finding Social Entrepreneurship & Innovation Minor, I knew that something was going to have to give. Social Entrepreneurship is the only avenue that I have found thus far that I seriously know would be viable and fulfilling as a career. I have been able to be honest with myself and realize not only that I don’t have to do two majors and a minor, but also that I don’t necessarily want to. As I have learned, balance and sleep are very important, something that I think there would be an acute lack of with two majors and a minor. Therefore, I have been able to manage both my parents' expectations for me to get a business degree and my own of not trying to overload myself. Currently, I plan on majoring in Business Analytics and minoring in Social Entrepreneurship & Innovation and possibly Sustainability. 
How have my personal relationships with others grown with my experience here at Notre Dame? In the last week before coming to school, I broke up with my long-term partner. Although I understand that it was something that was going to happen, it still very much emotionally impacted me in both the months leading up to it and the weeks after. As said by the Grotto Network, “I want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. And you get to put your heart back together.” (“Women Find Healing Through Kintsugi Workshop” by The Grotto Network - Moreau FYE Week Ten). With time, I have been able to heal from the experience. During high school, the relationship had negative impacts on my friendships with others, which was something that I was able to recognize but not do anything about. Here at Notre Dame, my perspective on friendships has very much shifted. Friendships with others should and will always come first, as I move forward with my life. Not only are they more fulfilling, but they are longer-lasting. I plan on using the rest of my time at Notre Dame to cultivate meaningful friendships, many of which I have already made. 
With such low diversity on campus, how have I done my part to educate myself on social issues? As explained by Professor Fuentes, “If we look at the way in which our society is structured, we see that racism and racial bias is implicit in the American experience” ("Diversity Matters!" by Prof. Agustin Fuentes - Moreau FYE Week Eleven). Like the American experience, I do believe it should be recognized that racism is also implicit in the Notre Dame experience. If the issue is ignored and swept under the rug, there will be no positive change. The lack of diversity on this campus is a big driver for most of this. I have observed that when people feel that they are in an environment that seems to have no consequences, they will say anything. It is very important to continue to raise awareness through the form of education of this issue and continue the conversation.   
How have I been able to find and demonstrate virtue on this campus without being Catholic? I do not believe that one has to be Catholic, or even religious, to live a virtuous life. Humanity has a special way of generally seeking the right way. In The Screwtape Letters, Lewis writes: “Our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our Enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of Him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys” (The Screwtape Letters, Chapter 8 by C.S. Lewis - Moreau FYE Week Twelve). I believe that this passage can be interpreted in an agnostic sense as well, for humans have a tendency to seek goodness and act in ways that create good effects, even when religion is not involved. I find that those who seek to do good without the promise of an eternal reward can also be seen as equally virtuous to those who are religious. 
I have already learned a great amount about myself and others during my short time here at Notre Dame. I hope that I will be able to continue to grow and change for the better in order to both have the best experience here and set myself up for success in the future.