Integration One - Boylan Professor Wagner Moreau FYE 15 October 2021 The Life of Aidan: Pursuit of Happiness, For Me and For All Root Belief #1: I believe that I am searching for life-giving and fortifying relationships. In recent years, I’ve had some hit and miss friendships. I’d best describe those relationships as ones of moments. In the best moments, it was great to be together, laugh together, and enjoy each other. But in time apart from those moments, things are cold and sterile. I see how cold and manipulative they can be. How they can hurl insults at others in the name of causing chaos amongst other relationships. But the worst is when those insults and negative energy turned between us. At times, those relationships were my closest, therefore they knew a lot about me at both my highs and lows. So as they continue their cycle of spreading controversy, eventually, my stories found their way into their hate. As Chimamanda Adichie states in her Ted Talk: “To insist on only these negative stories is to flatten my experience and to overlook the many other stories that formed me. The single-story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. They make one story become the only story” ("The danger of a single story" by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie - Moreau FYE Week Seven). To hear my moments of vulnerability spread like some gossip was disheartening. The falsehoods that people are able to derive from this narrow point of view of my life caused me a lot of distress. But as I distanced myself and reflected, I noticed how that person operated. They only hoped to discuss negative things, talked about others behind their backs, and used others to get what they wanted, all signs of a toxic friendship according to Olivia T. Taylor ("5 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ Signs You’re in a Toxic Friendship" by Olivia T. Taylor - Moreau FYE Week Four). Therefore as I realized this, I also began to think about all I missed by being locked up in these toxic relationships. At the end of senior year, I had thankfully shifted my friend group and experienced some truly fulfilling friendships. However, we’re now separated by a thousand miles at our different universities. So now as I’m at my home for the next four years, I need to find new relationships which will help build me and others up. Notre Dame provides a unique opportunity. As Father Pete states: “All of us have come to this university community, a community that purposefully emphasizes educating heart and mind, living lives that zealously respond to the love of God that we find in the gospel and the life of Jesus Christ. A community that seeks on its best days to be a family and endure, with hope, the pain that we can at times cause one another” ("The Role of Faith in Our Story", by Father Peter M. McCormick - Moreau FYE Week Three). We all applied to this university knowing how special this community is. The support expressed between one another, even between people that don’t know each other, will always make Notre Dame feel like home. So it really seems that I couldn’t have picked a better place to go out and discover those life-giving and fortifying relationships I had missed for most of my high school career. Thankfully both experience and Moreau have taught me what relationships to avoid and the warning signs associated with such while seeking new, and hopefully fulfilling, friendships. Root Belief #2: I believe that I am made to innovate and help create a better future As an engineering major, I strive to create solutions to the problems I see in the world around me. I constantly think about how I can fix the minor occurrences I see in a day. I want to fix a fan’s wobble, make a phone battery that lasts all day, and make shoes that keep their grip https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcZMeqWWOIs longer. However, when reflecting on the impact of these minor inconveniences and comparing them to the scale of the problems we as a society face, I realize how I have to shift my problem-solving focus. As David Brooks related in his Ted Talk about growth, “Adam I is built by building on your strengths. Adam II is built by fighting your weaknesses.” ("Should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?" by David Brooks - Moreau FYE Week Two). While an Adam I position would see me trying to improve the first world goods and services I’m accustomed to, and Adam II focus would implement my knowledge and resources to help build up others in this world. I need to adopt an Adam II focus to help solve the harsh reality that some people have to endure. I can use my skills to help create distillation plants to provide clean water, wind turbines to provide energy in remote areas, or even determine how to mass manufacture new medicines and vaccines. In adopting this Adam II position, I would be fulfilling Father Sorin’s vision for the effect of the University of Notre Dame: “This college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country” ("Sorin Letter to Moreau" by Father Edward Sorin - Moreau FYE Week Five). I believe that with my engineering degree, I will have the assets and tools to become a means of doing good towards the betterment of this world and could help develop a better future for all. Core Belief #3: I believe that I grow by embracing my vulnerability and openness to new concepts and ideologies I’d say that I typically have a fairly closed-off personality. I’m never the one to start up a conversation, If I don’t know someone well I won’t open up to them, and I typically avoid interactions if I can. All signs point to me being a decently introverted person in most walks of life. Yet, when I actually engage with someone, I almost act like a sponge. I am always willing to read and or hear about another opinion or perspective on a subject or life. The issue is that https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlLWTeApqIM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlLWTeApqIM https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woQDq3QrRkziT8eYrvYly5CQaP2Vb/view although I am open to most concepts, my fear of social interaction holds me back from growth. To quote Brené Brown’s Ted Talk, The power of vulnerability, “The more afraid we are, the more vulnerable we are, the more afraid we are” (“The Power of Vulnerability” by Brené Brown - Moreau FYE Week One). When I’m afraid to put myself in the spotlight and make mistakes, I’m essentially rejecting growth. However, if I embrace that vulnerability and recognize that mistakes are only human, I can listen to and reflect upon those new concepts and ideologies that I enjoy hearing. But what I have to remember is, as George Ella Lyon states, “you are the expert on you. No one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on. You don't have to know where to begin. Just start. Let it flow. Trust the work to find its own form.” ("Where I'm From" by George Ella Lyon - Moreau FYE Week Six). So as I venture down this new life at a new school with new people, I just have to remember that I forge my own path. It’s up to me to reject my fears of being vulnerable. If I want to continue to grow as a person, I have to embrace my vulnerability in order to see and hear all the different perspectives and aspects of life that I want to hear. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4Qm9cGRub0&feature=youtu.be http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html