Integration 3- Professor Harrington Integration 3: Eulogy 3/3/22 ’ Eulogy: Faith, Work, and Friendship Wow. I have already completed 3/4th of my freshman year at Notre Dame. This past half semester has flown by, faster than any half semester in my entire academic career. The old, and often overused, adage rings true, “time flies, when you’re having fun”. Although this half semester has been filled with triumphs and jubilation, Moreau has reminded me of my end fate. For instance, in Week 3 Moreau, we read Ruth Graham’s article that discusses Sister Aletheia, a nun obsessed with death. One of Sister Aletheia's admirers, Christy Wilkins states, “She’s so young and vibrant and joyful and is also reminding us all we’re going to die” (“Meet The Nun Who Wants You to Remember You Will Die” by Ruth Graham - Moreau FYE Week 3). Even though I have recently been filled with such elation, this article helped ground my senses. Sister Alethia herself also embodies this youthful energy, but simultaneously asks us to understand our impending deaths. With this in mind, I hope to write a heartfelt eulogy of my life, surrounding some of my core beliefs, or at least things I hope become my core beliefs. Andrew was a man who balanced his faith and his career. He never let his busy work life interfere with his faithfulness or the precious time he spent with his children. Every Sunday he attended Church with his family, no matter the circumstances. This message is best reiterated in Pico Iyer’s article which states, “This is what the principle of the Sabbath enshrines. It is, as Abraham Joshua Heschel, the great Jewish theologian of the last century, had it, ‘a cathedral in time rather than in space’; the one day a week we take off becomes a vast empty space through which we can wander, without agenda, as through the light-filled passageways of Notre Dame. Of course, for a religious person, it’s also very much about community and ritual and refreshing one’s relationship with God and ages past” (“Why we need to slow down our lives” by Pico Iyer - Moreau FYE Week 1). Andrew approached Sundays with an uncluttered and open mind. He allowed each Sunday to refresh not only his relationship with the Lord, but also with his family. He would cook his wife and children a big brunch every Sunday. While Andrew always made such an effort to keep the Lord’s day holy, he also always balanced his career and his faith. In his college days, Andrew questioned whether his career could have true meaning. He was a computer science major, who intended to work in business one day. But, computer science is not anywhere near a moral profession, right? You just plug in numbers into a computer all day. Also, why was his economics 101 class teaching him to be financially shrewd, but his philosophy course teaching him to be economically selfless? These conflicting ideas plagued his undergraduate studies. But, after watching a documentary on Father Hesburgh, his entire perspective changed. Father Hesburgh once noted that “In the wake of Vatican II, Catholic universities faced a critical question: Was it possible to be both a great university and Catholic? I believed it was. As long as there was balance… I was entirely devoted to the Church, but I wouldn’t let it stand in the way of education” (“Hesburgh'' by Jerry Barca and Christine O’Malley - Moreau FYE Week 2). Andrew embodied the message of Father Hesburgh, that one could truly discover a balance between the Church and education. In fact, he soon found a club at school called CS4 Good, a club dedicated to using computer science to solve social problems. He finally understood that his career could have significant social impact, and thus realized computer science was not morally obsolete. He died knowing that his career had true meaning, which very few people can say about their careers. Andrew also taught us how to actively search for a career that you truly love. Although computer science is a high paying field, Andrew did not choose his career based on money. In fact, Andrew knew what it meant to fail, over and over again. His career journey was anything but a straightforward process. As stated by the Notre Dame CCD, “Much as we present it with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order. It’s a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime and you’ll move between stages as you learn and grow” (“Navigating Your Career Journey - Moreau First Year Experience Course” by Meruelo Family CCD - Moreau FYE Week 4 ). Through all his different jobs and business (even the ones that failed) Andrew knew what it meant to be persistent. He understood that one’s career is filled with constant changes, but with each new change comes newfound growth. This is why his coworkers say he is such a nice person to work with. When I talk with his co-workers, the first thing they mention is his kindness, before they ever mention the high quality of his work. And this is what I believe it means to be a great person. Overall, Andrew had a perfect connection between his work and faith life. Andrew was a man of many friends and relationships, his network extended infinitely. He was always so open to discourse with his friends. For instance, his freshman year of college, he had a serious discussion with one of his closest friends, Shane. Although Shane commented on Andrew’s work ethic, Shane also noted that at times Andrew was too serious or too ambitious (Conversation with Shane - Moreau FYE Week 5). Yet, these flaws are not the center of this eulogy. The real message is that Andrew was open. He made himself so vulnerable, and this is what allowed him to form so many meaningful relationships. People valued how open he was, emotionally and psychologically. But, one of the most undervalued characteristics of Andrew’s life was his ability to self-reflect. He continually was shaping and sculpting his beliefs, always in search of a greater truth. He was always developing his skills, his values, and his relationships. As Dr. Eurich describes, “Asking why can sometimes cause our brains to mislead us. Let’s say I ask you to list all the reasons why your relationship is going the way it is. And let’s say that last night, your spouse stayed out at the office happy hour later than planned, leaving you alone to cook dinner for your visiting, rather dull in-laws. Because of something called the ‘recency effect,’ this could be your most salient thought about your relationship, so in reply to my question, your brain may misdirect you to the first available explanation” ( “The right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by Tasha Eurich - Moreau FYE Week 6). Andrew understood the true meaning of this excerpt. He did not let smaller, recent effects contribute to his overall well-being. Instead, Andrew would reflect on the bigger picture, aware that the human brain often over-emphasizes recent events. As many of us know, later in his life he became very involved with meditation and mindfulness. Such self-reflection allowed for a continual refinement of his character. Moreover, his movement to convert corporate America towards meditation reflects his dedication to such concepts. Still, Andrew knew that true happiness could not be found by a few minutes of meditation or deep breathing. He knew true happiness relied on your connection with others. Pope Francis once noted that “Many of us, nowadays, seem to believe that a happy future is something impossible to achieve… Happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (“Why the only future worth building includes everyone” by Pope Francis - Moreau FYE Week 7). While Andrew was heavily influenced by self-reflection, his ultimate path towards happiness lied in his friendships. As Pope Francis describes, happiness requires a harmony between all our different components, our friends, within our lives. We are only as strong as our weakest link. Andrew had relationships in the basketball world, relationships with special needs individuals (as https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serial_position_effect#Recency_effect https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serial_position_effect#Recency_effect he worked with Best Buddies), relationships with coworkers, but most importantly he had the most pure relationship with his family. The plethora of relationships is what made Andrew such a happy individual. Overall, three major things defined Andrew’s life: his work, his faith, and his friendships. And yet, he never sacrificed one for another. He will be missed dearly by his wife and 3 kids. I will end on Andrew’s favorite quote by Forrest Gump: “Mama always said life is like a box of chocolates: You never know what you’re gonna get”. Article Links: Week 1: https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ Week 2: https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-858 1-ab9500c9ecd9 Week 3: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html Week 4 :https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ Week 5: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1O35ZwlPhLKTu9ewqg_ae2-V9j8S3MNwb6ZeezBShJA8/ edit Week 6: (Week 7 on next page) https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1O35ZwlPhLKTu9ewqg_ae2-V9j8S3MNwb6ZeezBShJA8/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1O35ZwlPhLKTu9ewqg_ae2-V9j8S3MNwb6ZeezBShJA8/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ Week 7: https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_inc ludes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript