Schmitt 1 Prof. Lassen Moreau Final Integration December 2nd, 2021 A Brave New World If anything, my first semester in college has shown me how much I do not know. From general chemistry to international politics to philosophy, I cannot fathom how much there is to learn about the world. I am humbled to think that there is a lot I will never know. Even in this short time, I have encountered wildly different perspectives and ideals that I was never exposed to before. At times, I am unsure of how to respond. Coming out of high school, the world seemed less nuanced. Now, I realize it is almost impossible to understand the extent of one problem, let alone fix a world full of problems. I have begun to focus on what I can control and the one thing I can surely change, myself. “Moreau believed that life was essentially a personal, daily struggle for union with God … While none of us can be so perfect, the aim for the Christian was twofold: to reach one’s fullest potential in this world while remaining focused upon the ultimate goal of fullness in the life to come” (“Holy Cross and Christian Education” by Rev. James B King – Moreau FYE Week 12). Encountering so much that is different than what I have known has challenged my ability to figure out the dynamics of my life. In the pursuit of personal growth, I have greater respect for the unknown. While I am tempted to give an easy answer to discovering true goodness in the world, I must accept that there is not a beautiful, one size fits all answer I can give that would begin to satisfy the complexity of the problems we face. I can, however, take concrete steps towards making myself a force for good in the world. Like everyone here, I have a unique personal journey in which I worked hard to gain acceptance to an elite university. I had grand expectations entering Notre Dame. In the end, I had Schmitt 2 two academically elite choices. I chose a college for its Catholic identity. When I got to Notre Dame I was confused at the lack of Catholic identity as I knew it on campus. I attended my dorm's mass, the first-year mass, and other events. I could not figure out if I had not found it or if it was nonexistent. I understood and appreciated the diversity of opinion and background but was not finding the overarching Catholic morals I have become accustomed to. This led to a lot of doubt over the first month of school and has persisted to a lesser extent until now. I have been able to attribute some of the prior expectations to the college experience, but I have had difficulty with the expectations that uniquely characterize Notre Dame. I have been disappointed by the disparity between my expectations and reality. I began to wonder if I made the wrong decision. Despite this, I was determined to make the best of Notre Dame. I learned to “Trust yourself. Don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. Look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to” (“Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit” by Julia Hogan - Moreau FYE Week 9). I was out on my own and unsure of what to do. The best plan I could make was to trust myself. While I had to understand how much I do not know, trusting myself has helped me begin to make well- considered decisions for myself. I have begun to figure out where I belong and make Notre Dame my home. One of the biggest expectations I had was that I would find a unified student body working together for the good of the world. While I did find a student body working for the good, the good was not a unified vision. I had entered Notre Dame expecting to find a Catholic identity similar to the one I had in high school. Although there were a couple of Catholic events, I was caught off guard by the freedom college offered. I was used to attending required events, but now in college, it is up to me to pursue Catholic obligations. In a short time on campus, I Schmitt 3 encountered a significant student population that was not Catholic or even Christian. In addition, the Christians I knew came from wildly different backgrounds. I quickly found cultural and fundamental differences between us. I was able to find common ground and have still made a lot of friends, but I still find it difficult to accept or know how to respond to the differences. I still find myself thinking that Notre Dame would be a much stronger force for good if we were united in a specific mission, but this mission begins with me. “Long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as a capacity for connectedness” (“Thirteen Ways of Looking at Community” by Parker Palmer – Moreau FYE Week 11). Before looking to unite others, you must begin by connecting and understanding them. Without the information gained from truly being present and attentive, everyone will have their imperfect expectations of what the community is. One of the biggest eye-openers at Notre Dame was the explicit pursuit of solving contemporary problems such as racial discrimination and the political clash over the Covid-19 Pandemic. “Two hundred and twenty-five years later, we are like actors following the script for creating factions: Develop strong convictions. Group up with like-minded people. Shun the others. Play the victim. Blame the enemy. Stoke grievance. Never compromise” (“Wesley Theological Seminary Commencement” by Fr. John Jenkins – Moreau FYE Week 10). It was frustrating to watch without having any power over the situation. I began to consider why God would let these things happen. I began to focus on God’s role in the problems of the world. I thought that if God could only reveal himself then all of humanity would be unified under him. I have wondered why God cannot come down and reveal himself to man and show us concretely that he is real, and his promises exist. The writings of C.S. Lewis, specifically The Screwtape Letters, have helped me Schmitt 4 think through this issue. C.S. Lewis points out that God will never override human will and that is the ultimate reason for God’s inaction. “But you know see that the Irresistible and the Indisputable are the two weapons which the very nature of His scheme forbids Him to use” (“Screwtape Letters” by C.S. Lewis – Moreau FYE Week 12). God will not force anyone to follow his laws. Humanity was not created for this. Humanity was created to love God for his initiatives and to one day be reunited with God in perfection. It is easy to believe that God is absent in the worst of times, and the temptation for certainty in God destroys the mystery and much of the meaning in the existence of God. Without understanding the reasoning behind the existence of God, the arguments will truly be led by blind faith. It is in God's nature not to force humanity to love him, for that cannot be real love. Instead, we are called to love God of our free will. The consequence of this free will is disunity and suffering. When the world is seemingly full of problems and what you don't know feels bigger than what you do, it is natural to contemplate one's role in the world and the existence of God. You come to realize the importance of acting as if God truly exists versus living as if he did not. This brings me back to my early realizations of college life. I must control what I can control and work to better myself for the betterment of our community and the world. In our differences, we were all created in God’s likeness, and he designed us to one day be reunited with Him in perfection. It is in struggling through the hardship, doubt, and big life questions that God instills virtue in us and brings us closer to Him and His purpose for our lives. In the words of Father Jenkins, “Go now — become worthy sons and daughters of your seminary. Inspired by its example, go preach love, stand fast against the momentum of your times, and renew the face of the earth” (“Wesley Theological Seminary Commencement” by Fr. John Jenkins – Moreau FYE Week 10). Schmitt 5 Works Cited Julia Hogan, LCPC. “Why Letting Go of Expectations Is a Freeing Habit.” Grotto Network, 29 Jan. 2020, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of- expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. Jenkins, John. Marketing Communications: Web | University of Notre Dame. “Wesley Theological Seminary Commencement.” Office of the President, https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary- commencement/. King, James B. Holy Cross and Christian Education. Campus Ministry at the University of Notre Dame, 2 Dec. 2021. Lewis, C.S. The Screwtape Letters. Provided by the University of Notre Dame, 2021. Palmer, Parker J. “Thirteen Ways of Looking at Community • Center for Courage & Renewal.” Center for Courage & Renewal, 25 Feb. 2017, http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/