Integration 1




Be Vulnerable to Sharing Your Authentic Self

Everyone has a set of core values and beliefs that guide them through life. These may

change over time as we gain knowledge and have new experiences. Looking back at my life,

there are 3 root beliefs that I have developed and that have shaped me. I believe that you must be

open to vulnerability in order to grow, I believe that everyone should have a place where they are

free to voice their opinions, and finally, I believe you should live life for yourself and not for

anyone else.

My first root belief is that I believe you must be vulnerable to grow. Coming to college is

a big change for everyone and it is the time of many firsts. It is also the time you meet many

people and make connections with different types of people and build a sense of community. As

Father Pete says, “the growth that you’ve had at Notre Dame was not by accident, nor was it a

solo event” (“The Role of Faith in Our Story” by Fr. Pete McCormick - Moreau FYE Week

Three). Personal growth often heavily depends on the people around you and your relationships

with them. In order to make the most of these relationships and the community, you must be

willing to open yourself up and be vulnerable with others. This way you can share both the

positive and negative moments in a meaningful way, as well as be someone the other person

feels comfortable sharing with. This is important not only for my root belief of growth stemming

from vulnerability, but also cultivates my second root belief of creating a safe space for someone

to be able to voice their view and ideas freely.



Brene Brown also touches on the importance of vulnerability. She mentions that allowing

yourself to be vulnerable is what leads to joy and love by allowing us really feel our emotions to

connect and share them with others (“The Power of Vulnerability” by Brene Brown - Moreau

FYE Week One). Being able to be vulnerable enough to recognize, feel, and share our emotions

with others is a big part of emotional growth. In the past I have often tried to avoid feeling

emotions, or been bad at recognizing them. However, I have learned through others sharing their

emotions with me that it is okay to be vulnerable and feel emotions, whether they are good or

bad, and am trying to be more honest about them to both myself and others.

The second root belief I have is that everyone should have a place where they are free to

voice their opinions. Everyone has their own story to tell, and everyone has had different

experiences and perspectives growing up. The wide range of perspectives is what makes a

community such as Notre Dame, or a city such as New York City, such a rich environment and

one that fosters growth. Growing up in New York City, I have had the privilege of hearing and

learning from people of many different racial, cultural, and socioeconomic backgrounds. While

writing my “where I’m from” poem, I realized how impactful certain things like my culture were

on shaping my worldview, and how some peoples have vastly different things that have formed

their perspectives (“Where I’m From” by George Ella Lyon - Moreau FYE Week Six). Since

people have such different things to bring to the table, I believe everyone should be able to share

their opinions and perspectives freely. Sadly, this is often not the case due to predujices and

internal biases. Even though we may not even realize it, we often have internal biases present,

which may make people uncomfortable sharing their opinions on certain things.

Much of the time we are only predisposed to one perspective. An example used by

Adichie in her Tedtalk is about Mexicans being framed as “abject immigrants” by the media



(“Danger of a Single Story” by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie -  Moreau FYE Week Seven). This

leads to many people seeing them this was without truly looking at the other side or getting the

Mexican perspective of things. When people do this, it only feeds into internal biases. Instead, I

believe we should strive to seek out multiple perspectives. This emphasizes the importance of

my belief about creating a safe space for people to share their perspectives so that we can all

work to eliminate internal biases, and create a better and more open community where everyone

can be comfortable sharing their views.

The final root belief I have is that I believe you should only live life for yourself and no

one else. In today’s society, especially with social media, there is often the pressure to live a

“perfect” life and be like the people we see online. This especially impacts teenagers, and

frequently, people fall into the trap of living to be like someone else rather than their “authentic

selves.” This is also often related to wanting to fit in. I myself had fallen into this trap in high

school, specifically as a freshman. I had been focused on trying to fit in finding a group of

friends, I didn’t realize I had been losing myself while doing so. I had been changing who I was

in order to fit in rather than fining the group where I felt like I belonged. This mentality could

also be dangerous as it can lead you into toxic friendships. If someone senses that you will do

anything to try and fit in with the group, they can take advantage of this and use you to get what

they want. This is one of the red flags that your in a toxic friendship (“5 Signs You’re in a Toxic

Friendship” by Olivia T. Taylor, Grotto - Moreau FYE Week Four). By having a mentality of

doing what you want rather than what someone else wants you to do, you could avoid these types

of situations, and form healthy friendships. When we discussed this idea of fitting in versus

belonging in class, it made me realize it is important to be fully myself in college. I did not want



to be like my highschool self and change to fit it, I wanted to be myself and live life they way I

want to.

The idea of being your authentic self is also mentioned by Carla Harris in her speech. She

says “there is only one you, your authenticity is your distinct competitive advantage” (“2021

Laetare Medalist Address” by Carla Harris - Moreau FYE Week Five). Our individuality is one

of our strengths, and our differences are what build a diverse and enriching community, therefore

I believe it is important that people embrace follow their own paths and do what makes them

happy as it is beneficial to themselves and the people around them. Societal pressures do not

only affect teenagers, but also persist through adulthood. The pressure to be successful in life is

often instilled in us as kids. However, successful is often synonymous with wealth or power in

the case of occupation. As a result some people go into careers they believe will make them

successful rather than happy. David Brooks has a similar argument with his ideas of Adam I and

Adam II. He states “we happen to live in a society that favors Adam I, and often neglects Adam

II” (“Should you live for your Resume or Your Eulogy?” by David Brooks - Moreau FYE Week

Two). In other words, society mainly recognizes for people for their accomplishments rather than

their character. For this reason, many people choose to follow the path of success rather than

what they want. They are living for society rather than themselves. However, I believe this

doesn’t lead to a happiness. I believe it is better to live for yourself and the way you want and be

satisfied and happy in life, than to be successful in other peoples eyes yet be unhappy and just

wallowing through life.