Erōtopolis, the present state of Betty-land
         Cotton, Charles, 1630-1687.
      
       
         
           1684
        
      
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             Erōtopolis, the present state of Betty-land
             Cotton, Charles, 1630-1687.
          
           181 p.
           
             Printed for Tho. Fox ...,
             London :
             1684.
          
           
             Attributed to Cotton by NUC pre-1956 imprints.
             Reproduction of original in the Huntington Library.
          
        
      
    
     
       
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         eng
      
       
         
           Sex -- Anecdotes
        
      
    
     
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           ΕΡΩΤΟΠΟΛΙΣ
           .
        
         
           THE
           
             Present
             State
          
           OF
           BETTY-LAND
           .
        
         
           LONDON
           ,
           Printed
           for
           
             Tho.
             Fox
          
           ,
           at
           the
           White-Hart
           ,
           over
           against
           St.
           
           Dunstans-Church
           in
           Fleet-Street
           ;
           and
           at
           the
           Angel
           in
           Westminster-Hall
           ,
           1684.
           
        
      
    
     
       
         
         
         
           THE
           Present
           State
           of
           BETTY-LAND
           .
        
         
           THE
           Country
           of
           Betty-Land
           is
           a
           Continent
           adjoyning
           to
           the
           Isle
           of
           Man
           ,
           having
           the
           Island
           of
           Man
           wholly
           under
           its
           Jurisdiction
           ,
           it
           is
           of
           so
           large
           an
           Ext●nt
           ,
           that
           it
           spreads
           its
           self
           through
           all
           degrees
           whatsoever
           ,
           but
           the
           chiefest
           degrees
           whi●●
           are
           known
           to
           those
           that
           travel
           are
           from
           16
           to
           45
           both
           of
           Southern
           and
           Northern
           Latitude
           ,
           they
           that
           st●er
           by
           the
           Rules
           of
           Compass
           shall
           never
           know
           the
           Dominions
           of
           it
           .
           The
           Planet
           which
           rules
           it
           is
           Venus
           ,
           tho
           some
           
           aver
           that
           it
           lies
           all
           within
           the
           Tropick
           of
           Capricorn
           ,
           but
           for
           that
           Constellation
           which
           is
           called
           Virgo
           ,
           there
           are
           very
           few
           of
           the
           Inhabitants
           of
           this
           Country
           can
           endure
           to
           hear
           it
           named
           :
           they
           wonder
           what
           that
           lusty
           Planet
           the
           Sun
           can
           have
           to
           do
           with
           it
           .
        
         
           In
           this
           vast
           Empire
           of
           Betty-land
           there
           are
           several
           very
           large
           Provinces
           ,
           as
           the
           Province
           of
           Rutland
           ,
           wherein
           stands
           the
           Metropolis
           of
           the
           whole
           Empire
           called
           Pego
           ,
           the
           great
           Province
           of
           Bedford
           ,
           the
           wide
           Province
           of
           Will-shire
           ,
           the
           Province
           of
           Guelderland
           very
           little
           inhabited
           ,
           the
           Province
           of
           Slavonia
           ,
           the
           Province
           of
           Curland
           ,
           the
           Province
           of
           Maldavia
           ,
           famous
           for
           the
           great
           City
           of
           Lipsick
           ,
           the
           vast
           Territory
           of
           Croatia
           ,
           with
           the
           Province
           of
           Holland
           ,
           a
           migh●ty
           Tract
           of
           land
           under
           the
           Command
           of
           Count
           Horne
           ,
           with
           many
           others
           too
           long
           ,
           to
           repeat
           .
           
           There
           was
           formerly
           a
           certain
           Promontory
           or
           neck
           of
           land
           lying
           in
           this
           Country
           ,
           called
           the
           Cape
           of
           
             Good
             Hope
          
           ,
           but
           time
           has
           so
           utterly
           defac't
           it
           that
           there
           is
           hardly
           any
           sign
           thereof
           now
           remaining
           :
           The
           Temperature
           of
           the
           Soyl
           is
           as
           various
           as
           you
           may
           imagine
           any
           Climate
           to
           be
           that
           lies
           under
           so
           many
           far
           distant
           Meridians
           ,
           sometimes
           so
           cold
           (
           especially
           when
           it
           feels
           the
           refreshing
           influences
           of
           Wealth
           and
           Youth
           decay
           ,
           that
           Winter
           is
           more
           kind
           ,
           nay
           the
           very
           hearts
           of
           the
           people
           will
           be
           frozen
           ,
           and
           a
           Cart
           loaden
           with
           whole
           Canon
           may
           go
           over
           the
           streams
           of
           their
           former
           affection
           ,
           nothing
           but
           Ice
           of
           Disdain
           ,
           hailstones
           of
           Malice
           ,
           and
           most
           bitter
           storms
           of
           Reproach
           :
           sometimes
           so
           hot
           again
           ,
           that
           a
           man
           had
           better
           be
           let
           down
           in
           a
           basket
           in
           at
           the
           great
           hole
           of
           Mount
           Aetna
           ,
           than
           travel
           in
           some
           parts
           of
           the
           
           Country
           ,
           but
           touch
           it
           sometimes
           and
           you
           shall
           lose
           a
           Member
           ;
           it
           is
           worse
           than
           the
           Church-yard
           in
           Paris
           ,
           which
           consumes
           dead
           Carcases
           in
           four
           and
           twenty
           hours
           ,
           for
           if
           a
           man
           make
           a
           hole
           in
           some
           part
           of
           the
           mould
           ,
           and
           put
           but
           an
           inch
           of
           his
           flesh
           in
           ,
           it
           will
           raise
           such
           a
           flame
           in
           his
           body
           ,
           as
           would
           make
           him
           think
           Hell
           to
           be
           upon
           Earth
           :
           to
           say
           truth
           ,
           the
           nature
           of
           the
           Soyl
           is
           very
           strange
           ,
           so
           that
           if
           a
           man
           do
           but
           take
           a
           piece
           of
           it
           in
           his
           hand
           ,
           't
           will
           cause
           (
           as
           it
           were
           )
           an
           immediate
           Delirium
           ,
           and
           make
           a
           man
           fall
           flat
           upon
           his
           face
           upon
           the
           ground
           ,
           where
           if
           he
           have
           not
           a
           care
           ,
           he
           may
           chance
           to
           lose
           a
           limb
           ,
           swallowed
           up
           in
           a
           whirl-pit
           ,
           not
           without
           the
           Effusion
           of
           the
           choycest
           part
           of
           the
           blood
           :
           But
           for
           Tillage
           the
           Soyl
           is
           so
           proper
           ,
           and
           so
           delightful
           it
           is
           to
           manure
           ,
           that
           be
           it
           fruitful
           ,
           or
           be
           it
           barren
           ,
           men
           take
           the
           greatest
           
           pleasure
           in
           the
           world
           to
           plow
           it
           and
           sow
           it
           ,
           nay
           there
           are
           some
           men
           that
           take
           it
           for
           so
           great
           a
           pastime
           ,
           that
           they
           will
           give
           some
           a
           ●housand
           some
           two
           thousand
           pound
           a
           year
           for
           a
           little
           spot
           in
           that
           Country
           ,
           not
           so
           big
           as
           the
           palm
           of
           your
           hand
           :
           Herein
           it
           is
           of
           a
           different
           nature
           from
           all
           other
           Soyls
           ,
           for
           tho
           it
           be
           fertile
           enough
           ,
           yet
           after
           you
           have
           sufficiently
           plowed
           it
           and
           sown
           it
           ,
           it
           requires
           neither
           showres
           nor
           the
           dew
           of
           Heaven
           ,
           nor
           puts
           the
           husbandman
           to
           the
           troublesome
           Prayers
           for
           the
           alteration
           of
           weather
           ;
           yet
           if
           the
           husbandman
           be
           not
           very
           careful
           to
           tend
           it
           and
           water
           it
           himself
           every
           night
           ,
           once
           or
           twice
           a
           ●ight
           ,
           as
           they
           do
           Marjoram
           after
           Sun-set
           ,
           he
           will
           find
           a
           great
           deal
           of
           trouble
           all
           the
           year
           long
           ,
           tho
           there
           be
           a
           sort
           of
           Philosophers
           that
           understand
           the
           nature
           of
           the
           Soyl
           very
           well
           ,
           who
           
           say
           that
           that
           kind
           of
           Husbandry
           is
           very
           unnatural
           and
           very
           inconvenient
           for
           the
           Soyl
           ,
           and
           that
           it
           were
           far
           better
           for
           a
           provident
           Husbandman
           to
           have
           3
           or
           4
           or
           half
           a
           dozen
           farms
           one
           under
           another
           than
           to
           spend
           so
           much
           time
           ,
           toyl
           and
           labour
           altogether
           in
           vain
           ,
           for
           thereby
           many
           times
           the
           Crop
           comes
           to
           nothing
           ,
           and
           tho
           it
           may
           be
           very
           well
           got
           off
           the
           ground
           and
           seem
           fair
           for
           the
           time
           ,
           yet
           when
           you
           think
           to
           have
           the
           benefit
           of
           it
           ,
           you
           shall
           see
           it
           afterwards
           come
           to
           nothing
           ,
           and
           moulder
           away
           like
           a
           rotting
           Orange
           :
           If
           the
           Soyl
           be
           barren
           ,
           all
           the
           dung
           in
           the
           world
           will
           never
           do
           it
           any
           good
           ,
           yet
           the
           more
           barren
           it
           is
           ,
           the
           more
           will
           the
           Soyl
           cleave
           and
           gape
           for
           moisture
           ,
           the
           sands
           of
           Arabia
           are
           not
           so
           thirsty
           ,
           and
           yet
           as
           if
           there
           were
           a
           kind
           of
           witchcraft
           in
           the
           Soyl
           ,
           there
           are
           thousands
           of
           Husbandmen
           so
           strangely
           besotted
           ,
           that
           
           when
           they
           have
           hap'ned
           upon
           such
           a
           barren
           spot
           as
           this
           ,
           yet
           they
           will
           not
           stick
           to
           lay
           out
           their
           whole
           stock
           upon
           it
           ,
           tho
           they
           know
           it
           to
           be
           all
           to
           no
           purpose
           ,
           whereby
           many
           Husbandmen
           come
           to
           ruine
           ,
           not
           being
           able
           to
           pay
           their
           Landlords
           ;
           if
           the
           Soyl
           prove
           ●fruitful
           ,
           then
           they
           are
           as
           mad
           again
           on
           the
           other
           side
           ,
           then
           they
           so
           overstock
           it
           with
           variety
           of
           Flowers
           and
           Colours
           ,
           so
           tyre
           out
           Art
           with
           Inventions
           to
           beautifie
           nature
           ,
           that
           when
           winter
           comes
           there
           is
           hardly
           a
           leaf
           left
           to
           cover
           the
           ground
           ;
           as
           to
           the
           colour
           of
           the
           Soyl
           you
           shall
           have
           it
           very
           much
           vary
           ,
           for
           in
           some
           places
           you
           shall
           meet
           with
           a
           sandy
           mould
           which
           is
           generally
           very
           rank
           and
           very
           hot
           in
           its
           temperature
           ,
           so
           that
           it
           requires
           the
           greatest
           labour
           of
           all
           to
           manure
           it
           ,
           sometimes
           you
           shall
           light
           upon
           a
           kind
           of
           a
           white
           Chalk
           or
           ma●ly
           kind
           of
           a
           Soyl
           not
           so
           difficult
           to
           
           manure
           ,
           and
           besides
           the
           heart
           of
           the
           ground
           will
           be
           soon
           eaten
           out
           ;
           sometimes
           you
           meet
           with
           a
           brown
           mould
           which
           is
           of
           two
           sorts
           ,
           either
           light
           brown
           ,
           or
           dark
           brown
           .
           Husbandmen
           generally
           take
           great
           delight
           in
           manuring
           either
           of
           these
           ,
           for
           the
           Air
           is
           there
           generally
           wholsome
           ,
           and
           not
           so
           much
           annoyed
           with
           morning
           and
           evening
           Fogs
           and
           Vapours
           as
           the
           former
           ,
           besides
           that
           ,
           the
           husbandman
           shall
           be
           sure
           to
           have
           his
           penny-worth
           out
           of
           them
           ,
           for
           they
           will
           seldom
           lye
           fallow
           ;
           take
           which
           you
           will
           ,
           but
           if
           you
           meet
           with
           a
           black
           Soyl
           ,
           be
           sure
           you
           take
           short
           Leases
           ,
           and
           sit
           at
           an
           easie
           Rent
           ,
           lest
           your
           back
           pay
           for
           the
           Tillage
           ,
           for
           you
           must
           labour
           there
           night
           and
           day
           and
           all
           little
           enough
           :
           To
           tell
           you
           the
           truth
           ,
           choose
           which
           of
           them
           you
           will
           ,
           't
           is
           a
           cursed
           expensive
           thing
           to
           manure
           any
           of
           them
           all
           according
           as
           the
           Soyl
           requires
           ,
           especially
           in
           
           the
           Northern
           parts
           of
           the
           Country
           ,
           where
           the
           generality
           of
           the
           Husbandmen
           seem
           to
           have
           forfeited
           their
           discretion
           in
           this
           particular
           ,
           as
           if
           the
           very
           Air
           of
           the
           Soyl
           in
           those
           parts
           had
           a
           kind
           of
           bewitching
           Charm
           to
           deprive
           'em
           of
           their
           sences
           .
           These
           Soyls
           if
           they
           prove
           very
           fruitful
           indeed
           ,
           shall
           sometimes
           bring
           you
           3
           Crops
           at
           a
           time
           ,
           sometimes
           2
           ,
           but
           generally
           1
           ,
           a
           strange
           sort
           of
           Harvest
           ,
           for
           it
           consists
           chiefly
           in
           Mandrakes
           ,
           they
           bring
           forth
           both
           Male
           and
           Female
           ,
           which
           are
           very
           tender
           when
           they
           appear
           first
           above
           ground
           ,
           and
           must
           be
           tended
           more
           diligently
           than
           Musk-Melons
           in
           cold
           weather
           ,
           but
           if
           they
           overcome
           their
           first
           tenderness
           ,
           they
           grow
           as
           hardy
           as
           Bur
           Docks
           ,
           and
           will
           over-run
           a
           Country
           like
           
           Ierusalem-Artichoaks
           .
           These
           Mandrakes
           are
           very
           much
           esteemed
           by
           the
           generality
           of
           husbandmen
           ,
           who
           do
           very
           much
           lament
           the
           loss
           of
           their
           
           Crop
           ,
           which
           many
           times
           miscarries
           after
           it
           is
           come
           out
           of
           the
           Earth
           ,
           for
           it
           is
           very
           often
           blasted
           and
           sometimes
           (
           through
           the
           carelesness
           of
           idle
           huswifes
           their
           maid
           Servants
           )
           swept
           out
           of
           doors
           ,
           and
           thrown
           into
           houses
           of
           Office
           ,
           where
           (
           though
           Man's
           dung
           be
           counted
           the
           best
           of
           all
           dungs
           )
           these
           Plants
           will
           never
           thrive
           afterwards
           ;
           these
           Husbandmen
           that
           delight
           in
           Gardens
           ,
           find
           many
           Flowers
           there
           growing
           very
           agreeable
           to
           the
           nature
           of
           every
           one
           of
           the
           foregoing
           Soyls
           ;
           among
           the
           rest
           ,
           they
           bear
           
             Batchelors
             Buttons
          
           very
           familiarly
           ,
           there
           is
           also
           great
           store
           of
           
             Love
             lies
             a
             bleeding
          
           ,
           but
           above
           all
           
             sweet
             Williams
          
           ,
           and
           
             Tickle
             me
             quickly
          
           are
           to
           be
           found
           there
           in
           great
           abundance
           ,
           sometimes
           (
           tho
           very
           rarely
           here
           and
           there
           )
           you
           may
           find
           some
           few
           slips
           of
           Patience
           ,
           flower
           Gentle
           ,
           and
           Harts-ease
           ,
           but
           Rue
           grows
           up
           and
           down
           as
           
           thick
           as
           Grass
           in
           Ireland
           ;
           there
           are
           also
           great
           quantities
           of
           Time
           ,
           but
           the
           people
           of
           the
           Country
           slightly
           esteem
           it
           and
           make
           very
           little
           use
           of
           it
           .
           Fowl
           th●y
           have
           in
           great
           plenty
           ,
           but
           above
           all
           ,
           the
           most
           infinite
           flights
           of
           Wagtailes
           that
           ever
           were
           seen
           in
           any
           Country
           in
           the
           world
           .
           Beasts
           they
           have
           none
           but
           what
           are
           horned
           ,
           except
           the
           Hare
           and
           Coney
           ,
           but
           these
           are
           enough
           to
           stock
           the
           Country
           as
           large
           as
           it
           is
           ,
           were
           it
           as
           large
           again
           .
        
         
           There
           is
           but
           one
           great
           River
           to
           water
           the
           whole
           land
           ,
           besides
           two
           standing
           Pools
           which
           they
           can
           upon
           any
           occasion
           ,
           let
           out
           and
           drown
           all
           the
           Country
           ,
           which
           is
           the
           reason
           they
           have
           very
           little
           Fish
           ,
           only
           some
           few
           Maids
           ,
           but
           infinite
           numbers
           of
           Crabs
           ,
           as
           for
           their
           Carps
           they
           are
           grown
           so
           common
           ,
           they
           are
           hardly
           worth
           taking
           notice
           of
           ,
           and
           indeed
           there
           
           is
           little
           need
           of
           ●ish
           ,
           for
           the
           husbandmen
           being
           given
           to
           labour
           ,
           have
           good
           stomachs
           and
           are
           altogether
           for
           Flesh.
           the
           great
           River
           is
           over-look't
           by
           a
           great
           Mountain
           which
           (
           strange
           to
           tell
           at
           some
           seasons
           of
           the
           year
           )
           will
           swell
           at
           such
           a
           rate
           that
           it
           is
           admirable
           to
           behold
           it
           ,
           the
           swelling
           continues
           near
           ¾
           of
           a
           year
           ,
           and
           then
           upon
           a
           sudden
           it
           falls
           as
           strangely
           again
           ;
           the
           Husbandmen
           accompt
           the
           swelling
           of
           this
           Mountain
           very
           ominous
           ,
           for
           it
           generally
           portends
           a
           very
           dear
           year
           :
           they
           that
           have
           not
           taken
           a
           Lease
           of
           their
           Farms
           ,
           when
           they
           see
           this
           Mountain
           begin
           to
           swell
           ,
           will
           run
           quite
           away
           for
           fear
           the
           law
           should
           make
           them
           stand
           to
           their
           Bargain●
           :
           the
           whole
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           shews
           you
           a
           very
           fair
           prospect
           ,
           which
           is
           yet
           the
           more
           delightful
           the
           more
           naked
           it
           lies
           ;
           it
           makes
           the
           finest
           Landskips
           in
           the
           world
           ,
           if
           they
           be
           taken
           at
           
           the
           full
           Extent
           ;
           and
           many
           of
           your
           rich
           husbandmen
           will
           never
           be
           without
           them
           hanging
           at
           their
           bed
           sides
           ,
           especially
           they
           that
           have
           no
           Farms
           of
           their
           own
           ,
           meerly
           that
           they
           may
           seem
           to
           enjoy
           what
           they
           have
           not
           :
           some
           there
           are
           that
           so
           really
           believe
           they
           possess
           the
           substance
           by
           the
           sight
           of
           the
           shadow
           ,
           that
           they
           fall
           to
           till
           and
           manure
           the
           very
           Picture
           with
           that
           strength
           of
           Imagination
           ,
           that
           it
           is
           a
           hundred
           pounds
           to
           a
           penny
           they
           do
           not
           spoil
           it
           with
           their
           Instruments
           of
           Agriculture
           :
           others
           never
           so
           lazy
           or
           never
           so
           tyr'd
           before
           ,
           upon
           the
           sight
           of
           one
           of
           these
           Landskips
           ,
           shall
           revive
           again
           and
           go
           as
           fresh
           and
           lusty
           to
           their
           labour
           as
           if
           they
           never
           had
           been
           weary
           :
           I
           could
           wish
           these
           Customs
           were
           left
           off
           of
           hanging
           ,
           these
           Landskips
           by
           the
           husbandmen's
           bed
           sides
           ,
           for
           the
           consequences
           thereof
           are
           very
           mischivous
           ,
           seeing
           that
           it
           causes
           them
           
           to
           desire
           and
           covet
           one
           anothers
           Farms
           with
           that
           eagerness
           ,
           as
           if
           they
           were
           in
           open
           Hostility
           with
           the
           Tenth
           Commandment
           ,
           so
           that
           where
           they
           cannot
           get
           the
           prospect
           it self
           ,
           they
           will
           have
           a
           Land
           skip
           and
           occupy
           one
           anothers
           Estate
           in
           conceit
           :
           In
           a
           word
           ,
           the
           prospect
           of
           Betty-land
           is
           so
           grateful
           ,
           so
           pleasing
           to
           the
           Eye
           ,
           that
           the
           Country
           would
           be
           over-run
           with
           Inhabitants
           ,
           had
           not
           wise
           Nature
           put
           a
           stop
           to
           that
           extravagancy
           which
           she
           foresaw
           in
           Man
           by
           the
           badness
           of
           the
           Air
           ,
           which
           is
           universally
           not
           so
           dilicious
           in
           any
           Region
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           as
           it
           is
           in
           
             Arabia
             Faelix
          
           ;
           for
           neither
           in
           spring-time
           ,
           which
           is
           the
           time
           whereof
           we
           now
           discourse
           ,
           nor
           in
           summer
           time
           can
           the
           Air
           be
           very
           much
           commended
           ,
           especially
           if
           the
           wind
           be
           any
           thing
           high
           ,
           which
           has
           made
           many
           Men
           admire
           why
           the
           Poets
           should
           be
           such
           Lyers
           and
           Sycophants
           
           to
           talk
           as
           they
           do
           ;
           for
           some
           have
           not
           stuck
           to
           affirm
           that
           the
           Persumes
           of
           Betty-land
           are
           beyond
           all
           the
           Odors
           of
           the
           East
           ,
           which
           how
           true
           it
           is
           ,
           I
           will
           appeal
           to
           the
           very
           Noses
           of
           the
           Poets
           themselves
           ,
           who
           I
           know
           are
           as
           well
           skilled
           in
           the
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           as
           any
           Husbandmen
           in
           the
           world
           ;
           nor
           can
           any
           body
           have
           the
           confidence
           to
           contradict
           what
           I
           say
           ,
           that
           shall
           stay
           but
           a
           quarter
           of
           an
           hour
           in
           any
           place
           where
           the
           Thrashers
           have
           been
           lately
           at
           work
           .
           This
           was
           the
           reason
           that
           the
           Poets
           would
           never
           let
           the
           Gods
           (
           who
           were
           as
           great
           Farmers
           as
           ever
           liv'd
           in
           Betty-land
           )
           lie
           upon
           any
           other
           beds
           than
           beds
           of
           Roses
           ,
           and
           always
           persum'd
           the
           Air
           as
           they
           went
           with
           the
           richest
           Odors
           they
           could
           think
           of
           ,
           but
           in
           the
           Winter
           and
           Autumn
           seasons
           there
           is
           no
           enduring
           the
           Country
           :
           The
           Prospect
           is
           not
           worth
           one
           farthing
           ,
           the
           ways
           grow
           
           deep
           and
           rugged
           ,
           the
           land
           grows
           barren
           ;
           there
           is
           little
           or
           no
           pleasure
           in
           tilling
           the
           ground
           ,
           and
           the
           unwholsomness
           of
           the
           Air
           encreases
           ,
           which
           is
           very
           bad
           for
           those
           that
           hold
           their
           Farms
           by
           long
           leases
           ,
           yet
           so
           severely
           are
           some
           Husbandmen
           tyed
           by
           their
           Leases
           ,
           especially
           in
           the
           Northern
           parts
           of
           this
           Country
           ,
           that
           there
           is
           no
           avoiding
           them
           ,
           yet
           some
           there
           are
           that
           will
           for
           all
           that
           ,
           privately
           hire
           a
           new
           Farm
           ,
           perhaps
           such
           a
           one
           where
           neither
           Spade
           or
           Dibble
           entered
           before
           ,
           and
           then
           they
           let
           the
           old
           only
           lye
           fallow
           ,
           wherein
           if
           they
           act
           cautiously
           ,
           they
           may
           do
           well
           enough
           ;
           but
           if
           the
           Landlord
           of
           the
           old
           Farm
           come
           to
           know
           of
           it
           ,
           and
           sue
           upon
           the
           Covenant
           of
           the
           old
           Lease
           ,
           Heavens
           bless
           us
           !
           you
           would
           think
           Heaven
           an●
           Earth
           were
           going
           together
           ,
           you
           would
           swear
           all
           the
           Lapland
           Witches
           were
           excercising
           their
           Sorce●ies
           
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           such
           Storms
           ,
           such
           Tempests
           ,
           such
           Thunder
           ,
           such
           Lightning
           ,
           such
           Apparitions
           ,
           enough
           to
           scare
           the
           poor
           plow-jogger
           out
           of
           his
           wits
           :
           by
           and
           by
           the
           Landlady
           enters
           upon
           the
           new
           Farm
           in
           the
           Devils
           name
           ,
           tears
           down
           all
           before
           her
           ,
           makes
           such
           a
           disfigurement
           of
           the
           Prospect
           ,
           and
           digs
           up
           the
           very
           surface
           of
           the
           Soyl
           it self
           with
           so
           much
           indignation
           ,
           havock
           and
           destruction
           ,
           that
           you
           would
           think
           her
           to
           be
           quite
           raving
           mad
           ,
           yet
           there
           shall
           be
           no
           impeachment
           of
           wast
           against
           her
           ,
           so
           strictly
           is
           the
           husbandman
           bound
           by
           the
           Covenants
           of
           his
           Lease
           and
           nonsensical
           Custom
           of
           the
           Country
           ,
           at
           which
           time
           if
           ye
           chance
           to
           tell
           any
           of
           these
           Landladies
           of
           the
           Civil
           Law
           ,
           they
           'l
           presently
           spit
           in
           your
           face
           .
        
         
           Having
           thi●
           fair
           occasion
           it
           will
           not
           be
           amiss
           to
           take
           notice
           by
           what
           Tenures
           the
           husbandmen
           
           hold
           their
           Farms
           most
           usually
           in
           this
           Country
           ,
           some
           therefore
           you
           must
           know
           hold
           in
           Tail
           special
           ;
           true
           it
           is
           ,
           that
           there
           are
           v●ry
           few
           that
           hold
           by
           this
           Tenure
           ,
           yet
           thos●
           few
           that
           do
           ,
           a●e
           soon
           weary
           of
           it
           ,
           for
           it
           puts
           them
           to
           very
           hard
           duty
           ,
           and
           however
           they
           have
           taken
           a
           Lease
           hand
           over
           head
           or
           for
           covetousness
           of
           a
           good
           Bargain
           ,
           yet
           it
           many
           times
           falls
           out
           that
           they
           meet
           with
           many
           Incumbrances
           which
           they
           never
           thought
           of
           ,
           several
           concealed
           common
           sewers
           ,
           and
           filthy
           nusances
           which
           they
           never
           expected
           ,
           so
           that
           the
           Landlords
           (
           as
           they
           do
           many
           times
           allow
           the
           husbandmen
           considerable
           summs
           of
           mony
           to
           enter
           upon
           the
           Premises
           and
           to
           begin
           the
           world
           withal
           )
           had
           better
           have
           given
           the
           sam●
           mony
           for
           a
           meaner
           Soyl
           ;
           and
           〈◊〉
           for
           all
           this
           ,
           the
           conditions
           of
           the
           Lease
           are
           so
           hard
           ,
           that
           the
           husbandman
           is
           obliged
           to
           hold
           it
           during
           
           life
           ,
           which
           makes
           many
           of
           them
           turn
           ill
           husbands
           :
           and
           tho
           they
           cannot
           throw
           up
           their
           Leases
           ,
           yet
           they
           neglect
           their
           Calling
           and
           let
           their
           Farms
           lie
           fallow
           :
           whereby
           all
           possibility
           of
           Issue
           or
           the
           hopes
           of
           any
           Fruit
           of
           his
           labour
           becomes
           Extinct
           .
           Thus
           a
           Tail
           special
           is
           not
           always
           the
           most
           special
           Tail
           ,
           and
           to
           cut
           it
           off
           would
           hazard
           the
           destruction
           of
           the
           whole
           Title
           ,
           besides
           that
           there
           lies
           such
           an
           Impeachment
           of
           wast
           against
           the
           Husbandman
           that
           should
           do
           it
           ,
           that
           it
           would
           undo
           him
           for
           ever
           ;
           and
           therefore
           it
           is
           the
           Opinion
           of
           many
           ,
           that
           a
           Tail
           General
           may
           be
           as
           good
           as
           a
           Tail
           Special
           ,
           which
           tho
           it
           be
           the
           first
           Tenure
           in
           order
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           yet
           some
           there
           are
           that
           p●efer
           a
           Tail
           General
           before
           it
           .
           All
           men
           must
           confess
           that
           a
           strict
           property
           in
           a
           Tail
           Special
           is
           a
           very
           good
           thing
           ,
           but
           considering
           the
           Inconveniences
           that
           do
           
           attend
           it
           ,
           a
           general
           Tail
           may
           be
           esteemed
           the
           better
           Tenure
           ,
           as
           being
           accompanied
           with
           greater
           Advantages
           ,
           for
           it
           requires
           not
           half
           the
           fealty
           and
           homage
           which
           the
           other
           does
           ,
           neither
           if
           the
           Husbandman
           will
           have
           a
           private
           Farm
           to
           himself
           for
           his
           divertisement
           i●
           there
           half
           so
           much
           notice
           taken
           of
           it
           ,
           and
           therefore
           they
           that
           can
           brook
           the
           freedom
           of
           a
           Tail
           General
           live
           very
           happily
           ,
           and
           many
           times
           acquire
           large
           fortunes
           .
        
         
           Others
           there
           are
           that
           holds
           by
           Knights
           Service
           in
           the
           Courtesy
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           these
           are
           notable
           Farmers
           indeed
           ,
           jolly
           ,
           brisk
           fellows
           that
           will
           spend
           with
           ever
           a
           Gentleman
           in
           the
           Country
           of
           a
           thousand
           pound
           a
           year
           ,
           and
           make
           them
           pawn
           their
           Credit
           and
           their
           Substance
           to
           boot
           to
           bear
           up
           with
           them
           :
           these
           men
           as
           they
           have
           the
           greatest
           pleasure
           in
           the
           world
           to
           manure
           their
           Grounds
           ,
           so
           they
           
           reap
           a
           world
           of
           profit
           by
           their
           labour
           ;
           nay
           tho
           the
           Soyl
           be
           never
           so
           long
           worn
           and
           out
           of
           heart
           ,
           yet
           they
           will
           make
           something
           on
           't
           ,
           for
           they
           seldom
           lose
           their
           pains
           .
           There
           are
           a
           fort
           of
           nice
           people
           that
           would
           fain
           disallow
           these
           Tenures
           ,
           but
           seeing
           that
           they
           plead
           the
           common
           practice
           and
           plead
           prescription
           time
           out
           of
           mind
           ,
           I
           know
           no
           reason
           why
           they
           may
           not
           pass
           for
           currant
           :
           others
           there
           are
           ●hat
           hold
           in
           Fee
           simple
           ,
           a
           miserable
           sort
           of
           Swains
           ,
           that
           are
           always
           weeping
           to
           their
           neighbors
           ,
           and
           ●elling
           sto●ies
           o●
           their
           hard
           Barga●ns
           ▪
           〈…〉
           ,
           they
           are
           ty'd
           to
           〈…〉
           ,
           besides
           that
           ,
           〈…〉
           which
           they
           enjoy
           have
           not●●ng
           of
           prospect
           ,
           nor
           are
           kind
           for
           ●illage
           ,
           the
           mould
           being
           gene●●●ly
           〈◊〉
           and
           rough
           ,
           and
           〈…〉
           
           there
           is
           no
           pleasure
           in
           the
           Tillage
           :
           but
           such
           hu●bandmen
           as
           those
           a●e
           no
           ways
           to
           be
           pitied
           ,
           because
           they
           submit
           to
           their
           Calamity
           :
           others
           there
           are
           which
           are
           always
           dealing
           in
           Reversions
           and
           Remainders
           ,
           a
           very
           necessary
           sort
           of
           husbandmen
           indeed
           ,
           for
           they
           support
           the
           Reputation
           of
           many
           a
           Farm
           prejudiced
           by
           being
           over-occupied
           ,
           which
           else
           would
           lie
           upon
           the
           Landlords
           hands
           ;
           true
           it
           is
           ,
           they
           run
           a
           very
           great
           hazard
           ,
           but
           they
           are
           generally
           very
           poor
           men
           ,
           and
           therefore
           seeing
           there
           is
           mony
           to
           be
           got
           e'n
           let
           them
           get
           it
           :
           they
           are
           no
           way
           to
           be
           discouraged
           ▪
           for
           they
           help
           many
           a
           labo●ious
           husbandman
           at
           a
           dead
           lift
           ,
           and
           quit
           them
           of
           a
           great
           deal
           of
           trouble
           which
           might
           otherwise
           befal
           them
           .
        
         
           Reversions
           and
           Remainders
           are
           very
           frequent
           in
           this
           Country
           ,
           especially
           where
           the
           husbandmen
           being
           Yeomen
           of
           the
           best
           rank
           hold
           
           either
           in
           Capite
           or
           in
           Frank-Marriage
           or
           else
           are
           Tenants
           at
           Will
           :
           These
           are
           the
           bravest
           f●llows
           in
           the
           wo●ld
           ,
           but
           if
           the
           Marke●s
           run
           low
           ,
           then
           th●
           Crop
           lies
           upon
           〈◊〉
           hands
           ,
           which
           makes
           them
           willi●g
           to
           part
           with
           their
           Rever●●ons
           upon
           any
           rate
           :
           They
           make
           no
           more
           of
           the
           Lord
           of
           the
           Manner
           than
           of
           a
           Jack-a-Lent
           ,
           and
           if
           they
           be
           summoned
           to
           Court
           ,
           they
           bid
           the
           Bayliff
           kiss
           their
           back-sides
           ,
           yet
           are
           they
           as
           industrious
           as
           any
           when
           they
           meet
           with
           a
           Farm
           to
           their
           liking
           ;
           but
           the
           truth
           on
           't
           is
           ,
           they
           are
           great
           spenders
           ,
           even
           as
           fast
           as
           they
           get
           it
           ;
           happy
           are
           those
           Farms
           which
           they
           manure
           ,
           for
           they
           'l
           spare
           for
           no
           cost
           to
           increase
           their
           own
           content
           :
           The
           mischief
           on
           't
           is
           ,
           they
           must
           have
           great
           stocks
           or
           else
           they
           can
           never
           go
           through
           with
           what
           they
           undertake
           ,
           nor
           must
           they
           
           have
           only
           good
           Magazines
           to
           spend
           high
           ,
           but
           good
           store
           of
           discretion
           to
           boot
           ,
           or
           else
           they
           may
           chance
           to
           bring
           an
           old
           house
           over
           their
           heads
           for
           all
           their
           great
           substance
           ,
           for
           the
           world
           is
           full
           of
           Eyes
           and
           Ears
           ,
           full
           of
           prying
           busie-bodies
           and
           observers
           in
           every
           Corner
           ;
           so
           that
           a
           husbandman
           let
           him
           hold
           by
           what
           Tenure
           he
           pleases
           ,
           cannot
           be
           too
           wary
           or
           too
           cautious
           .
           Two
           Philosophers
           meeting
           upon
           the
           Road
           fell
           into
           a
           Discourse
           about
           these
           three
           last
           sorts
           of
           Tenures
           ,
           says
           one
           of
           them
           who
           was
           a
           perfect
           Cynick
           ,
           I
           approve
           none
           of
           the
           three
           last
           sort
           of
           Tenures
           ;
           You
           are
           a
           fool
           ,
           reply'd
           the
           other
           ,
           and
           understand
           the
           nature
           of
           Betty-land
           no
           more
           then
           a
           horse
           ,
           the
           people
           in
           that
           Country
           are
           naturally
           given
           to
           love
           freedom
           and
           liberty
           ,
           naturally
           prone
           to
           change
           and
           variety
           ,
           and
           therefore
           as
           long
           
           as
           you
           may
           find
           these
           Tenures
           in
           Littleton
           ,
           as
           I
           am
           sure
           you
           may
           ,
           they
           cannot
           be
           bad
           ;
           can
           you
           change
           the
           nature
           of
           the
           Soyl
           ?
           no
           more
           can
           you
           change
           the
           nature
           of
           the
           Husbandmen
           ,
           for
           tho
           you
           thrust
           Nature
           back
           with
           a
           fork
           she
           will
           push
           forwards
           again
           :
           if
           they
           manure
           their
           Farms
           well
           ,
           and
           you
           see
           the
           fields
           full
           and
           fair
           and
           swelling
           with
           Grain
           ,
           if
           they
           make
           them
           bear
           their
           Crops
           in
           season
           ,
           what
           is
           it
           to
           you
           how
           many
           Farms
           they
           have
           ,
           how
           long
           or
           how
           little
           they
           hold
           them
           ,
           especially
           when
           there
           are
           so
           many
           gaping
           after
           Reversions
           ;
           were
           it
           in
           a
           Country
           where
           there
           are
           more
           Farmers
           then
           Farms
           ,
           I
           grant
           you
           there
           were
           some
           reason
           for
           what
           you
           say
           ,
           but
           every
           man
           of
           reading
           knows
           that
           Betty-land
           is
           a
           Country
           where
           there
           are
           ten
           Farms
           for
           one
           Farmer
           and
           it
           is
           great
           pity
           that
           any
           Farm
           should
           lye
           fallow
           for
           want
           of
           manu●ing
           .
           
           Now
           when
           one
           Farmer
           takes
           one
           Farm
           for
           pleasure
           ,
           another
           for
           profit
           ,
           that
           Farmer
           takes
           two
           ;
           when
           another
           Farmer
           takes
           one
           farm
           for
           profit
           ,
           another
           for
           pleasure
           ,
           and
           another
           upon
           good
           liking
           ,
           he
           takes
           three
           ,
           and
           so
           all
           the
           Farms
           come
           to
           be
           occupied
           :
           As
           for
           being
           Tenants
           at
           Will
           ,
           and
           so
           leaving
           their
           Farms
           when
           they
           will
           ,
           't
           is
           not
           a
           farthing
           matter
           ,
           for
           let
           one
           husbandman
           have
           a
           Fa●m
           to
           day
           ,
           another
           will
           take
           it
           tomorrow
           ;
           on
           the
           other
           side
           ,
           you
           must
           consider
           ,
           that
           tho
           a
           husbandman
           have
           one
           ,
           two
           or
           three
           Farms
           to
           himself
           ,
           yet
           there
           is
           no
           Farmer
           in
           Betty-land
           can
           enclose
           his
           own
           ground
           all
           the
           year
           long
           by
           the
           custom
           of
           the
           Country
           ,
           but
           that
           from
           Lammas
           to
           St.
           
           Pauls-tide
           ,
           it
           must
           lie
           common
           for
           the
           benefit
           of
           his
           neighbors
           ,
           which
           is
           allowed
           in
           Law
           ,
           and
           is
           called
           common
           because
           of
           neighborhood
           :
           nay
           
           more
           then
           that
           ,
           there
           is
           hardly
           a
           Farm
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           where
           there
           is
           not
           some
           ground
           that
           lies
           common
           all
           the
           year
           long
           ;
           so
           that
           if
           the
           poor
           husbandman
           had
           not
           some
           private
           Enclosures
           to
           relie
           to
           ,
           his
           case
           were
           the
           worst
           case
           of
           all
           the
           cases
           in
           the
           world
           :
           to
           say
           truth
           ,
           there
           is
           such
           a
           world
           of
           Common
           in
           Bettyland
           ,
           that
           a
           husbandman
           is
           not
           to
           be
           blamed
           to
           get
           as
           much
           Enclosure
           as
           he
           can
           :
           and
           more
           than
           this
           ,
           when
           the
           ground
           begins
           once
           to
           lie
           common
           ,
           it
           receives
           all
           the
           Beasts
           in
           nature
           ,
           not
           excepting
           Swine
           ,
           Geese
           and
           Goats
           ,
           which
           all
           other
           Commons
           admit
           not
           of
           .
        
         
           The
           whole
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           lies
           very
           low
           ,
           which
           is
           the
           r●●son
           th●t
           there
           is
           ha●dly
           a
           Farm
           in
           〈…〉
           of
           it
           without
           a
           Decoy
           ,
           nor
           〈…〉
           cunning
           of
           the
           Decoyd●●ks
           l●ss
           notorious
           ,
           for
           they
           〈◊〉
           all
           other
           Decoy-ducks
           that
           
           are
           in
           the
           world
           in
           wi●es
           and
           subtilty
           .
           There
           is
           not
           a
           Widgeon
           in
           in
           all
           the
           Country
           ,
           but
           has
           a
           Decoy-duck
           to
           wait
           upon
           him
           ,
           and
           they
           lay
           their
           Trains
           so
           cunningly
           ,
           that
           it
           is
           impossible
           to
           escape
           them
           ,
           and
           as
           they
           are
           very
           cunning
           ,
           so
           they
           are
           very
           cruel
           ,
           for
           they
           never
           get
           a
           Gull
           into
           their
           Decoy
           ,
           but
           they
           shall
           pull
           off
           all
           his
           feathers
           :
           these
           D●coys
           are
           some
           Natural
           ,
           some
           Artificial
           ;
           there
           is
           not
           a
           pin
           to
           choose
           betwixt
           them
           ,
           for
           they
           are
           both
           plaguy
           devouring
           things
           ,
           and
           clear
           all
           the
           Country
           before
           them
           ,
           of
           whatever
           game
           they
           seek
           after
           .
           Orpheus
           in
           his
           Argonautiques
           ,
           speaking
           of
           a
           great
           Decoy-duck
           in
           his
           time
           (
           which
           the
           people
           of
           Betty-land
           called
           by
           the
           name
           of
           Circe
           )
           says
           that
           she
           was
           so
           curiously
           set
           out
           
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
             .
          
           That
           all
           men
           admir'd
           her
           that
           beheld
           her
           ,
           and
           were
           so
           stupisied
           with
           the
           sight
           of
           her
           g●iety
           
           that
           they
           could
           make
           no
           resistance
           against
           her
           ,
           sor
           saith
           the
           same
           Author
           ,
           
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
             —
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
          
           ,
           her
           golden
           feathers
           shone
           like
           the
           Sun-beams
           ,
           nor
           do
           they
           cry
           like
           other
           Ducks
           :
           for
           they
           have
           most
           delicate
           voices
           ,
           and
           can
           sing
           far
           beyond
           any
           Nightingales
           .
        
         
           There
           is
           no
           Country
           in
           the
           world
           that
           has
           Decoy-ducks
           like
           Betty-land
           ,
           being
           a
           rarity
           no
           where
           else
           to
           be
           ●ound
           ,
           were
           there
           not
           so
           many
           of
           them
           ,
           you
           would
           verily
           take
           them
           to
           be
           Phenixes
           :
           for
           they
           are
           many
           times
           burnt
           in
           their
           own
           Nests
           .
           This
           Decoy-duck
           called
           Circe
           ,
           had
           like
           to
           have
           spoiled
           us
           two
           of
           the
           best
           Stories
           we
           have
           extant
           :
           
             Homers
             Vlysses
          
           ,
           and
           
             Virgils
             Aeneids
          
           ,
           for
           this
           very
           Duck
           had
           like
           to
           have
           drawn
           the
           two
           great
           Hero's
           of
           the
           world
           ,
           Vlysses
           and
           Aeneas
           into
           the
           Decoys
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           to
           the
           ruine
           of
           all
           the
           
           projects
           of
           the
           very
           Gods
           themselves
           .
        
         
           There
           was
           another
           Decoy-duck
           no
           less
           famous
           than
           the
           former
           ,
           which
           was
           called
           Medea
           ,
           a
           damn'd
           mischievous
           Bird
           ,
           tho
           for
           the
           beaury
           of
           her
           wings
           said
           to
           be
           the
           Suns
           .
           Grand-child
           :
           for
           what
           ever
           game
           she
           gets
           into
           her
           Decoy
           ,
           she
           utterly
           ruines
           ,
           and
           therefore
           Nicander
           a
           great
           Farmer
           in
           Betty-land
           and
           the
           high-Constables
           fellow
           for
           knowledge
           of
           the
           Country
           ,
           gives
           his
           fellow-husbandmen
           very
           good
           caution
           ,
           for
           saith
           he
           —
           
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
             —
          
           If
           a
           poor
           husbandman
           come
           to
           be
           decoy'd
           into
           one
           of
           her
           Decoys
           .
           
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
             —
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
             —
          
           the
           poor
           Widgon
           had
           better
           a
           thousand
           times
           have
           fallen
           into
           the
           Poulterers
           hands
           .
        
         
         
           From
           these
           two
           famous
           Decoy-ducks
           ,
           have
           all
           the
           Decoy-ducks
           in
           Betty-land
           learnt
           all
           their
           wiles
           and
           cunning
           Tricks
           ,
           and
           if
           any
           thing
           of
           nature
           be
           wanting
           ,
           they
           hav●
           all
           their
           kinck-knacks
           ,
           all
           their
           postures
           ,
           gestures
           ,
           trickings
           and
           tri●●ings
           imaginable
           to
           help
           nature
           ;
           for
           they
           know
           as
           well
           as
           can
           be
           ,
           how
           weakly
           those
           Avenues
           to
           the
           understanding
           (
           the
           Eyes
           and
           Ears
           )
           are
           gua●●●●d
           ,
           and
           th●r●fore
           they
           chiefly
           lay
           their
           Trains
           there
           :
           if
           they
           see
           a
           Widgeon
           or
           a
           Gull
           pass
           by
           ,
           they
           will
           spread
           their
           Tailes
           like
           so
           many
           Peacocks
           ,
           and
           set
           the
           poor
           silly
           birds
           a
           staring
           like
           so
           many
           Country
           Bumpkins
           at
           a
           Coronation
           .
           By
           and
           by
           comes
           a
           slight
           of
           Dotte●●ls
           ,
           and
           then
           they
           set
           up
           their
           throats
           and
           sing
           ,
           and
           sing
           and
           ●ly
           ,
           and
           ●ly
           and
           sing
           ;
           so
           that
           the
           foolish
           Fowl
           bewitcht
           with
           their
           Quail-pipes
           ,
           follow
           their
           birdcalls
           
           to
           whatever
           inconveniences
           they
           are
           minded
           to
           carry
           them
           into
           .
           Some
           are
           of
           that
           opinion
           ,
           that
           it
           is
           an
           easie
           thing
           to
           avoid
           these
           Decoys
           :
           but
           how
           can
           that
           be
           ,
           when
           we
           find
           that
           both
           Vlysses
           and
           Aeneas
           were
           forced
           to
           have
           some
           God
           or
           other
           always
           tyed
           to
           their
           tails
           to
           keep
           them
           out
           of
           harms
           way
           ?
           Some
           there
           are
           indeed
           ,
           that
           by
           dint
           of
           main
           Prudence
           escape
           the
           danger
           ,
           but
           for
           one
           of
           those
           there
           are
           a
           thousand
           others
           that
           have
           nothing
           but
           their
           dear-bought
           Experience
           to
           preserve
           them
           :
           And
           for
           one
           of
           those
           ten
           thousand
           more
           that
           will
           suffer
           themselves
           to
           be
           decoy'd
           six
           or
           seven
           and
           twenty
           times
           over
           ,
           till
           they
           have
           not
           one
           feather
           to
           cover
           their
           tails
           :
           for
           the
           nature
           of
           these
           Decoys
           is
           such
           ,
           that
           tho
           they
           feed
           a
           simple
           husbandman
           (
           that
           all
           the
           while
           neglects
           the
           manuring
           of
           his
           own
           Farm
           )
           with
           
           such
           pleasure
           and
           co●tent
           ,
           yet
           they
           consume
           and
           wast
           both
           body
           and
           purse
           most
           desperately
           and
           insensibly
           :
           desperately
           ,
           because
           inj●rably
           ;
           insensibly
           ,
           because
           the
           s●lly
           husbandman
           wallowing
           in
           present
           delight
           ,
           neither
           consults
           or
           minds
           approaching
           misfortune
           ,
           yet
           if
           a
           Gull
           or
           a
           Dotterel
           or
           a
           Widgeon
           have
           a
           mind
           to
           be
           reveng'd
           upon
           a
           Decoy-duck
           that
           has
           been
           too
           cunning
           for
           him
           ,
           there
           is
           a
           way
           to
           do
           it
           ,
           by
           setting
           another
           Decoy-duck
           upon
           her
           .
        
         
           Thus
           when
           the
           Decoy-duck
           Medea
           would
           have
           decoy'd
           the
           greatest
           Farmer
           in
           all
           Betty-land
           (
           even
           Iupiter
           himself
           )
           Iuno
           who
           was
           Iupiters
           Decoy-duck
           took
           her
           and
           wrung
           off
           her
           neck
           ,
           and
           surely
           Iuno
           serv'd
           her
           well
           enough
           for
           a
           proud
           Quinstrel
           as
           she
           was
           ,
           that
           spent
           all
           the
           morning
           in
           laying
           her
           Nets
           ,
           if
           we
           may
           believe
           
             Apollonius
             Rhodius
          
           ,
           another
           
           great
           Farmer
           in
           Betty-land
           who
           describes
           her
           .
        
         
           
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
          
           .
           Trimming
           and
           pruning
           her
           Feathers
           by
           the
           Sea-side
           ,
           that
           is
           to
           say
           ,
           sitting
           before
           a
           great
           looking-Glass
           in
           her
           Smock-sleeves
           ,
           with
           her
           Hair
           dishevell'd
           ,
           and
           her
           Neck
           and
           Breasts
           bare
           ,
           expecting
           the
           coming
           of
           the
           great
           Farmer
           Iupiter
           ,
           but
           Iuno
           prevented
           them
           both
           ,
           as
           you
           have
           heard
           :
           and
           so
           much
           for
           the
           Decoys
           in
           Betty-land
           .
        
         
           For
           the
           Antiquity
           of
           the
           Country
           we
           need
           not
           go
           far
           to
           search
           it
           out
           :
           no
           sooner
           was
           there
           any
           light
           delivered
           to
           the
           world
           by
           Letters
           ,
           but
           the
           first
           discovery
           that
           was
           made
           ,
           was
           the
           discovery
           of
           Betty-land
           :
           what
           it
           was
           before
           may
           be
           easily
           conjectured
           ,
           but
           in
           the
           time
           of
           the
           Greek
           and
           Roman
           Poets
           ,
           it
           was
           a
           flourishing
           Kingdom
           even
           in
           Heav'n
           it self
           :
           containing
           
           all
           that
           large
           Tract
           which
           was
           in
           Greek
           called
           
             〈◊〉
             〈◊〉
             〈◊〉
             〈◊〉
             〈◊〉
          
           :
           nay
           ,
           ev●n
           Caelum
           it self
           f●om
           whom
           Heaven
           was
           called
           Caelum
           ,
           was
           a
           Farmer
           in
           that
           Country
           ,
           and
           so
           great
           a
           husband
           man
           ,
           so
           great
           and
           so
           industrious
           a
           Manurer
           of
           his
           Farms
           ,
           that
           Orpheus
           calls
           him
           
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
          
           :
           And
           by
           the
           Latine
           Poet
           he
           is
           said
           ,
           
             
               —
               Faecundis
               Imbribus
            
             
               Conjugis
               in
               Gremium
               laetae
               discendere
               .
            
          
           And
           how
           he
           stockt
           the
           world
           with
           Mandrakes
           ,
           you
           may
           easily
           read
           in
           Hesiod
           ,
           who
           in
           his
           Theogony
           wrote
           of
           the
           Celestial
           Agriculture
           ,
           as
           Markham
           among
           us
           wrote
           of
           Terrestrial
           Husbandry
           .
        
         
           Saturn
           also
           was
           a
           great
           Husbandman
           in
           the
           Celestial
           part
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           and
           because
           he
           liv'd
           upon
           his
           Means
           ,
           was
           therefore
           said
           to
           eat
           his
           own
           Children
           :
           But
           for
           Iupiter
           ,
           he
           was
           certainly
           the
           greatest
           Husband-man
           that
           ●ver
           was
           in
           
           the
           whole
           World
           ,
           for
           he
           had
           Farms
           in
           both
           Betty-lands
           ,
           and
           was
           so
           industrious
           and
           so
           infatigable
           in
           manuring
           and
           tilling
           them
           ,
           that
           he
           left
           no
           stone
           unturn'd
           of
           which
           he
           could
           make
           any
           Advantage
           :
           And
           therefore
           Aratus
           who
           was
           a
           kind
           of
           an
           Almanack-maker
           to
           the
           Celestial
           Farmers
           says
           of
           him
           with
           a
           great
           deal
           of
           slattery
           ,
           
             
               —
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
            
             
               —
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
               ,
            
          
           so
           that
           there
           was
           not
           a
           publique
           high-way
           ,
           not
           a
           market-place
           in
           all
           the
           Country
           which
           he
           left
           unplow'd
           :
           nay
           the
           very
           Sea
           ,
           the
           very
           Rivers
           and
           Lakes
           were
           full
           of
           his
           Husbandry
           ;
           by
           that
           you
           may
           guess
           that
           he
           l●ft
           a
           great
           stock
           behind
           him
           .
           The
           same
           Poet
           seems
           also
           to
           intimate
           t●●t
           he
           was
           the
           first
           Foun●●●
           (
           as
           〈◊〉
           as
           we
           say
           Iupiter
           was
           the
           〈…〉
           in
           the
           world
           )
           of
           
             〈◊〉
             -
             land
          
           ,
           as
           Nimrod
           
           was
           the
           first
           founder
           of
           the
           Babilonish
           Empire
           ;
           for
           saith
           he
           in
           the
           beginning
           of
           his
           Poem
           ,
           
             a
             Ioveprincipium
             ,
             Apollonius
             Rhodius
          
           gives
           us
           a
           notable
           Character
           of
           him
           .
           
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
            
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
               .
            
          
           He
           was
           so
           great
           a
           husbandman
           that
           there
           was
           never
           a
           Farm
           either
           in
           the
           Terrestrial
           or
           Celestial
           Betty-land
           ,
           but
           he
           would
           be
           thrusting
           his
           Spade
           into
           it
           ;
           to
           tell
           the
           truth
           ,
           all
           the
           Poets
           Fables
           concur
           to
           show
           you
           the
           Original
           ,
           Encrease
           and
           vast
           Extent
           of
           the
           Country
           of
           Bettyland
           ;
           such
           as
           are
           the
           Stories
           of
           
             Caelum
             ,
             Iupiter
             ,
             Saturn
             ,
             Venus
             ,
             Priapus
             ,
             Adonis
             ,
             Bacchus
             ,
             Aristius
             ,
          
           (
           and
           the
           rest
           too
           long
           to
           repeat
           )
           all
           great
           Husbandmen
           that
           kept
           their
           plows
           going
           day
           and
           night
           .
           As
           t●
           the
           Terrestrial
           Bettyland
           ,
           what
           think
           you
           of
           that
           most
           applanded
           Farmer
           Hercules
           ?
           that
           so
           many
           Ages
           ago
           plow'd
           and
           sow'd
           50
           
           large
           Farms
           in
           one
           night
           :
           what
           havock
           ,
           what
           killing
           and
           slaying
           of
           the
           poor
           Grecians
           ,
           what
           a
           destruction
           of
           unhappy
           Troy
           ,
           and
           all
           for
           one
           unhappy
           Farm
           belonging
           to
           that
           City
           which
           Menelaus
           laid
           claim
           to
           :
           what
           think
           ye
           of
           Demosthenes
           that
           so
           many
           years
           since
           gave
           for
           the
           possession
           of
           a
           small
           Farm
           lying
           ab●ut
           Athens
           only
           for
           one
           night
           312
           l.
           ?
           for
           so
           Gellius
           records
           .
        
         
           In
           what
           a
           flourishing
           condition
           was
           the
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           in
           the
           time
           of
           
             Menander
             ,
             Aristophanes
             ,
             Anaereon
             ,
             Plautus
             ,
             Terence
             ,
             Tribullus
             ,
             Ovid
             ,
             Martial
          
           and
           Petronius
           ,
           who
           all
           wrote
           of
           the
           Husbandry
           and
           Tillage
           of
           their
           times
           ?
           In
           the
           Infancy
           of
           the
           world
           ,
           Priapus
           had
           so
           engross'd
           all
           the
           Farms
           in
           the
           Country
           Lampsacus
           ,
           a
           fair
           Territory
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           by
           reason
           of
           the
           unusual
           Activity
           ,
           largeness
           and
           strength
           of
           his
           Plow
           ,
           that
           
           the
           Countrymen
           conspired
           against
           him
           for
           monopolizing
           their
           Livings
           :
           I
           might
           insist
           longer
           upon
           the
           Antiquity
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           but
           that
           I
           am
           apt
           to
           believe
           there
           is
           no
           man
           so
           simple
           to
           question
           it
           .
           They
           may
           as
           well
           deny
           the
           Sun
           ,
           who
           was
           no
           sooner
           made
           ,
           but
           he
           fell
           to
           tilling
           and
           cultivating
           the
           vast
           and
           most
           immense
           Fields
           of
           nature
           ,
           for
           the
           whole
           Region
           of
           Betty-land
           holds
           of
           nature
           as
           her
           chief
           Sovereign
           and
           Empress
           ,
           and
           the
           Sun
           as
           her
           sole
           Steward
           to
           gather
           her
           Quit-Rents
           ,
           provide
           Tenants
           and
           let
           Livings
           ;
           aud
           therefore
           if
           you
           come
           to
           any
           Farmer
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           and
           ask
           him
           how
           he
           came
           to
           take
           such
           affection
           to
           the
           husbandry
           of
           that
           Country
           ,
           he
           will
           make
           answer
           pr●s●ntly
           ,
           't
           is
           natural
           to
           him
           :
           And
           for
           any
           Soyl
           to
           bear
           that
           S●●d
           which
           is
           proper
           for
           it
           ,
           that
           all
           the
           world
           knows
           to
           be
           natural
           .
           Now
           〈…〉
           
           the
           force
           of
           natures
           Impulse
           ,
           I
           shall
           say
           more
           when
           I
           come
           to
           the
           Religion
           of
           the
           Country
           ;
           seeing
           then
           it
           is
           the
           Impulse
           of
           Nature
           that
           moves
           the
           Husbandmen
           of
           Betty-land
           to
           take
           upon
           them
           that
           Toyl
           and
           Labor
           which
           they
           undergo
           night
           and
           day
           :
           should
           they
           be
           blam'd
           for
           what
           they
           cannot
           avoid
           ?
           for
           who
           can
           blame
           a
           Jack
           for
           turning
           the
           spit
           when
           the
           weight
           is
           on
           ,
           or
           a
           wheel
           for
           turning
           round
           when
           a
           Dog
           walks
           in
           it
           ?
           rather
           there
           ought
           a
           way
           to
           be
           found
           out
           for
           the
           Incouragement
           of
           
             these
          
           Moylers
           and
           Toylers
           ;
           for
           tho
           all
           men
           are
           prone
           to
           be
           drudges
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           yet
           the
           husbandry
           of
           the
           Country
           is
           quite
           out
           of
           order
           ;
           there
           is
           no
           method
           at
           all
           observed
           amongst
           them
           ,
           a
           most
           wonderful
           thing
           that
           in
           so
           vast
           a
           Country
           and
           so
           long
           continuance
           ,
           there
           never
           yet
           was
           found
           any
           Region
           wherein
           the
           Husbandry
           of
           Betty-land
           
           was
           so
           exactly
           ordered
           ,
           as
           in
           that
           small
           part
           of
           it
           as
           was
           once
           called
           〈◊〉
           ,
           for
           it
           is
           observed
           in
           that
           part
           of
           Bettyland
           ,
           the
           Price
           of
           Farms
           ran
           always
           very
           low
           ;
           the
           only
           way
           to
           restore
           the
           decay
           of
           Betty-land
           husbandry
           ;
           therefore
           we
           ●ead
           of
           one
           very
           ●ich
           Farmer
           there
           ,
           who
           bought
           a
           very
           fair
           Farm
           in
           that
           Count●y
           for
           thi●ty
           change
           of
           Rayments
           ,
           and
           of
           another
           g●eat
           Fa●mer
           that
           bought
           a
           Royal
           Farm
           in
           the
           same
           place
           ,
           for
           one
           hundred
           fore●●●●●
           :
           a
           very
           inconsiderable
           price
           ,
           considering
           what
           poor
           Farmers
           are
           forc't
           to
           give
           now
           a-days
           .
           The
           Druids
           in
           the
           Island
           of
           Britannia
           a
           very
           large
           part
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           aim'd
           at
           this
           very
           thing
           when
           they
           Entail'd
           their
           Lands
           upon
           their
           Male-Mandrakes
           ,
           had
           they
           Entayl'd
           their
           Substance
           in
           Mony
           as
           well
           as
           in
           Land
           ,
           they
           had
           hit
           the
           Mark
           :
           It
           is
           to
           be
           
           wondred
           that
           in
           a
           Country
           of
           so
           much
           freedom
           as
           Betty-land
           is
           ,
           and
           Govern'd
           by
           constitutions
           so
           far
           different
           from
           other
           Countries
           ,
           Landlords
           should
           be
           so
           egregiously
           led
           astray
           to
           give
           such
           vast
           Summs
           of
           Mony
           to
           put
           off
           their
           Farms
           ,
           tho
           never
           so
           f●uitful
           ,
           never
           so
           flourishing
           :
           For
           the
           Muck
           of
           Po●tions
           tho
           it
           be
           spread
           never
           so
           thick
           upon
           a
           Betty-land
           Farm
           ,
           avails
           nothing
           to
           the
           fertility
           thereof
           ,
           rather
           it
           is
           the
           greatest
           Inconvenience
           in
           the
           world
           to
           a
           Betty-land
           Farmer
           ,
           for
           he
           understanding
           that
           there
           lies
           a
           Silver
           or
           a
           Gold
           Mine
           in
           such
           a
           Farm
           ,
           or
           such
           an
           Hesperian
           Orchard
           is
           laden
           ▪
           with
           golden
           Apples
           ,
           will
           have
           at
           them
           by
           hook
           or
           by
           〈…〉
           
           way
           to
           lay
           those
           She●
           Arguses
           asleep
           ,
           and
           when
           all
           comes
           to
           all
           ,
           n●ither
           Orchard
           nor
           Farm
           are
           agreeable
           to
           his
           mind
           ,
           or
           sit
           for
           Tillage
           :
           nay
           many
           times
           the
           ground
           proves
           barre●
           ,
           marshy
           ,
           unwholsom
           ,
           ran●
           ,
           and
           mou●tainous
           ;
           so
           that
           there
           is
           no
           profit
           nor
           〈◊〉
           in
           manu●i●g
           or
           dressing
           it
           :
           wh●r●as
           if
           th●se
           Alluremen●s
           lay
           not
           before
           the
           Eyes
           of
           the
           Husbandman
           ,
           he
           would
           choose
           the
           most
           delightful
           Prospects
           ,
           the
           most
           f●uitful
           Soyls
           :
           and
           the
           sub●stance
           of
           the
           Country
           being
           contracted
           into
           the
           hands
           of
           the
           husbandmen
           only
           ,
           would
           make
           the
           Farmers
           more
           able
           to
           maintain
           their
           husbandry
           :
           then
           you
           should
           hear
           none
           of
           those
           common
           complaints
           of
           Landlords
           ,
           by
           ●eason
           of
           their
           Farms
           lying
           upon
           their
           hands
           ;
           nay
           you
           should
           not
           see
           an
           indifferent
           Farm
           in
           all
           the
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           lye
           
           wast
           and
           ruinous
           for
           want
           of
           Tillage
           :
           whereas
           now
           how
           many
           fair
           delicate
           fruitful
           Soyls
           lie
           fallow
           ?
           how
           many
           beautiful
           Orchards
           lie
           undrest
           ?
           because
           they
           either
           want
           Silver
           Mines
           ,
           or
           are
           not
           laden
           with
           golden
           Apples
           :
           Another
           great
           discouragement
           to
           the
           Husbandry
           of
           Betty-land
           is
           this
           ,
           that
           the
           extreme
           folly
           of
           the
           husbandmen
           themselves
           is
           not
           some
           way
           restrain'd
           ;
           for
           they
           having
           obtain'd
           a
           rich
           Farm
           ,
           doat
           upon
           it
           with
           so
           much
           vanity
           ,
           that
           they
           spend
           more
           labour
           and
           cost
           upon
           one
           Farm
           ,
           then
           would
           serve
           to
           maintain
           forty
           good
           Farms
           in
           full
           heart
           ,
           so
           that
           divide
           a
           Farmers
           whole
           substance
           in
           six
           pa●ts
           ,
           he
           shall
           wast
           and
           consume
           five
           parts
           and
           an
           half
           upon
           one
           singl●
           Farm
           ,
           which
           is
           a
           great
           cause
           of
           the
           general
           Impoverishment
           of
           th●
           Betty-land
           Husbandmen
           .
           Then
           comes
           a
           third
           ,
           and
           as
           grievous
           a
           discouragement
           
           as
           any
           ;
           for
           these
           Rich
           Soyls
           by
           reason
           of
           their
           Richness
           grow
           ●ank
           and
           proud
           ,
           and
           the●
           the
           poor
           husbandman
           is
           so
           plagued
           with
           Weeds
           ,
           N●ttles
           ,
           and
           wild-Ar●ichoaks
           ,
           that
           none
           can
           imagine
           it
           ,
           but
           they
           that
           feel
           the
           trouble
           :
           you
           shall
           see
           nothing
           but
           the
           gay
           Poppies
           that
           kill
           and
           burn
           up
           his
           profitable
           Harvest
           ,
           and
           which
           is
           worst
           of
           all
           ,
           the
           poor
           Farmer
           is
           left
           without
           Remedy
           .
           For
           in
           the
           Northern
           parts
           of
           Betty-land
           there
           is
           no
           help
           :
           pull
           them
           by
           the
           roots
           he
           cannot
           ,
           they
           are
           got
           so
           deep
           in
           the
           Earth
           ;
           let
           him
           take
           a
           wee●ing-hook
           in
           his
           hand
           ,
           and
           the
           whole
           Country
           cries
           out
           upon
           him
           ,
           and
           besides
           all
           this
           ,
           Petronius
           —
           
             Lex
             armata
             sedes
             circum
             fera
             li
             —
             mina
             Nuptae
             .
          
        
         
           The
           Stream
           ●of
           the
           Law
           runs
           quite
           against
           the
           Farmers
           for
           the
           Law
           is
           so
           careful
           to
           prevent
           wast
           
           and
           destruction
           that
           it
           will
           not
           admit
           of
           gentle
           pruning
           ,
           for
           fear
           some
           o●
           the
           more
           impatient
           so●t
           should
           thence
           take
           an
           occasion
           not
           only
           to
           injure
           ,
           but
           confound
           their
           Farms
           .
        
         
           Having
           thus
           given
           you
           a
           description
           of
           the
           〈◊〉
           ,
           it
           m●y
           not
           be
           amiss
           to
           shew
           you
           som●thing
           of
           the
           nature
           of
           the
           Inhabitants
           .
           They
           are
           generally
           very
           Amorous
           ,
           or
           rather
           universally
           given
           to
           Love
           ;
           which
           according
           to
           the
           interpretation
           of
           some
           of
           the
           Sages
           ,
           is
           as
           much
           as
           to
           say
           Libidinous
           :
           for
           the
           Temper
           of
           Mandrakes
           both
           Male
           and
           Female
           is
           for
           the
           most
           part
           both
           hot
           and
           moist
           ,
           which
           are
           the
           Principles
           of
           Generation
           ;
           which
           is
           the
           Principal
           foundation
           of
           all
           Love
           ,
           that
           is
           to
           say
           ,
           of
           that
           which
           is
           generally
           reputed
           to
           be
           Love
           ,
           which
           by
           another
           name
           is
           call'd
           Desire
           ,
           according
           to
           that
           of
           the
           Poet.
           
        
         
           
           
             Nil
             amor
             est
             aliud
             Veneris
             quam
             parca
             voluptas
             ,
          
           
             Quae
             simul
             expleta
             est
             infinita
             ora
             Rubor
             .
          
        
         
           For
           you
           must
           know
           there
           is
           no
           true
           and
           real
           Love
           in
           the
           whole
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           and
           therefore
           there
           was
           never
           any
           Shepherd
           in
           Betty-land
           that
           lov'd
           a
           Shepherdess
           with
           that
           height
           and
           true
           Affection
           as
           Shepherds
           have
           lov'd
           Shepherds
           ;
           never
           had
           husbandman
           so
           much
           kindness
           for
           the
           richest
           Farm
           ,
           the
           most
           beautiful
           Prospect
           ,
           the
           most
           fruitful
           and
           most
           agreeable
           Soyl
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           as
           Damon
           had
           for
           
             Pythias
             ,
             Theseus
          
           never
           had
           that
           Affection
           for
           Ariadne
           ,
           as
           he
           had
           for
           Pirithous
           :
           nor
           shall
           the
           Story
           of
           Orpheus
           stand
           in
           my
           way
           ,
           tho
           he
           sued
           Pluto
           for
           a
           Farm
           that
           Persephon●
           had
           taken
           from
           him
           .
           For
           if
           Euridice
           was
           his
           Soul
           ,
           I
           cannot
           blame
           
           him
           that
           he
           followed
           the
           croud
           of
           his
           brother
           Harpers
           to
           Hell
           when
           that
           was
           departed
           :
           but
           take
           him
           how
           you
           please
           ,
           one
           Swallow
           makes
           no
           Summer
           ,
           and
           the
           Reason
           is
           plain
           .
           For
           the
           Inhabitants
           of
           Betty-land
           love
           one
           another
           ,
           not
           out
           of
           any
           true
           Affection
           ,
           but
           for
           the
           hopes
           of
           Reward
           and
           self-Satisfaction
           :
           which
           Reward
           or
           Satisfaction
           decaying
           through
           Age
           or
           Infirmities
           ,
           the
           great
           Love
           that
           was
           just
           now
           ,
           cools
           in
           a
           moment
           like
           the
           〈◊〉
           of
           Venison
           :
           And
           therefore
           Betty-land
           .
           Love
           is
           but
           a
           hot
           degree
           and
           eager
           pursuit
           after
           pleasure
           ,
           which
           encreases
           sometimes
           to
           that
           height
           ,
           that
           both
           Shepherds
           and
           Shepherdesses
           seem
           to
           be
           mad
           ;
           which
           was
           the
           reason
           that
           when
           Iupiter
           took
           away
           the
           fair
           Shepherdess
           ,
           call'd
           Europa
           ,
           out
           of
           Terrestrial
           Betty-land
           ,
           the
           Poets
           ●eign'd
           him
           to
           be
           turn'd
           into
           a
           Bull
           ,
           a
           beast
           most
           
           ●as●ivious
           and
           impetuous
           in
           the
           〈◊〉
           of
           his
           Amours
           .
           No
           less
           did
           this
           fury
           appear
           formerly
           in
           the
           female
           Inhabitants
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           while
           Semiramis
           rages
           for
           the
           Embraces
           of
           her
           Son
           ,
           and
           〈◊〉
           roars
           for
           the
           Pizzle
           of
           a
           Bull
           ;
           and
           no
           question
           but
           the
           Temper
           of
           that
           little
           spot
           of
           Ground
           belonging
           to
           the
           Shepherdess
           Massalina
           ,
           still
           continues
           ●●aried
           tho
           not
           ●●tiated
           tho
           it
           (
           
             quinto
             &
             vig●simo
             Concubitu
          
           )
           had
           been
           plowed
           and
           harrowed
           twenty
           five
           times
           in
           a
           day
           and
           a
           night
           :
           Could
           the
           numberless
           number
           of
           consum'd
           and
           wasted●
           C●lves
           of
           the
           poor
           husbandmen
           speak
           ?
           Could
           you
           ●ut
           hea●
           the
           Bannings
           and
           Cur●ings
           in
           
             Quevedo's
             Hell
             of
             untimely
             〈◊〉
          
           ,
           exhausted
           and
           drain'd
           with
           continual
           Labor
           ;
           Could
           you
           but
           behold
           the
           many
           Sacrifices
           of
           Lust
           ,
           the
           many
           Martyrdoms
           of
           female
           pastime
           ?
           would
           but
           your
           
           reserv'd
           Nurses
           ,
           Chamber-maids
           ,
           and
           Apothecaries
           but
           vouchsafe
           to
           open
           the
           Cabinets
           of
           their
           Breasts
           ▪
           how
           many
           regal
           Pasts
           ,
           incarnating
           Electuaries
           ,
           restoring
           Potions
           they
           give
           in
           a
           year
           ;
           you
           would
           〈◊〉
           soon
           be
           acquainted
           with
           the
           Nature
           of
           
           Betty-land-Love
           ,
           which
           is
           so
           far
           from
           being
           true
           Love
           ,
           that
           it
           is
           only
           a
           continual
           practice
           of
           Surprize
           .
           The
           flames
           of
           Desire
           like
           a
           Candle
           discovering
           the
           ●●cret
           Paths
           and
           Labyrinths
           which
           the
           Shepherds
           and
           shepherdesses
           of
           all
           Sexes
           ,
           Ages
           ,
           Degrees
           ,
           and
           Humors
           choose
           in
           pursuit
           of
           their
           Amorous
           Designs
           .
        
         
           Thus
           we
           find
           the
           Love
           of
           the
           Shepherds
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           to
           be
           more
           fierce
           ,
           of
           the
           Shepherde●●●●
           to
           be
           more
           constant
           ;
           how
           Youth
           loves
           wantonly
           ,
           old
           Age
           〈◊〉
           :
           They
           that
           are
           poor
           strive
           〈◊〉
           please
           by
           Officiousness
           &
           continual
           Duty
           ,
           the
           Rich
           oblige
           by
           Gifts
           ,
           the
           
           middle
           sort
           puts
           their
           Confidence
           in
           Invitations
           ,
           Fish-Dinners
           ,
           and
           S●ring-Garden-Collations
           ;
           the
           Nobler
           sort
           of
           Arcadians
           in
           Masques
           and
           Enterludes
           .
           In
           some
           parts
           o●
           Betty-land
           you
           shall
           find
           the
           ingenious
           Lover
           as
           full
           of
           dissimulation
           as
           an
           Egg
           full
           of
           meat
           ,
           using
           a
           kind
           of
           elaborate
           Courtship
           ;
           praising
           the
           Object
           of
           his
           Affection
           in
           high
           streins
           of
           Madrigals
           and
           Eclogues
           ,
           and
           preferring
           her
           for
           the
           fairest
           in
           the
           World
           ,
           when
           he
           thinks
           nothing
           less
           :
           if
           he
           grow
           jealous
           ,
           he
           observes
           her
           as
           a
           Cat
           watcheth
           a
           Mouse
           ,
           if
           he
           miss
           her
           ,
           then
           he
           curses
           her
           to
           the
           pit
           of
           Hell
           :
           others
           impatient
           ,
           mad
           ,
           and
           restless
           in
           their
           Desires
           ;
           bewail
           their
           Flames
           at
           the
           fe●t
           of
           their
           Goddess
           ,
           and
           invoak
           her
           Pity
           ;
           if
           he
           enjoys
           her
           ,
           he
           either
           grows
           jealous
           of
           her
           ,
           and
           kills
           her
           ,
           or
           being
           thoroughly
           s●tiated
           ,
           prostitutes
           her
           :
           but
           if
           he
           despair
           of
           
           Enjoyment
           ,
           then
           no
           man
           more
           crucifies
           himself
           ,
           no
           man
           seemingly
           desires
           to
           die
           with
           more
           willingness
           ;
           as
           if
           his
           Peace
           were
           absolutely
           made
           in
           Heav'n
           .
           The
           wanton
           Lover
           is
           all
           for
           obs●quious
           Admiration
           ,
           for
           Songs
           ,
           Jests
           ,
           and
           Tales
           ;
           Jealousie
           makes
           him
           as
           melancholy
           as
           an
           old
           Cat
           ,
           Despair
           hurries
           him
           to
           Revenge
           ,
           to
           Scandal
           and
           Reproach
           ,
           and
           many
           times
           to
           attempt
           Violence
           :
           Enjoyment
           makes
           him
           despise
           her
           easie
           fondness
           ,
           and
           as
           much
           desire
           another
           .
           Others
           are
           a
           long
           time
           before
           they
           grow
           warm
           ,
           but
           being
           once
           enflam'd
           ,
           they
           spare
           for
           no
           Cost
           :
           Jealousie
           makes
           him
           clutch
           his
           Fists
           ,
           where
           he
           misses
           his
           Aim
           he
           returns
           Contempt
           :
           Enjoyment
           causes
           him
           to
           grow
           cold
           .
           Some
           pretend
           a
           world
           of
           Kindness
           ,
           others
           dissemble
           and
           conceal
           their
           Flames
           to
           be
           more
           belov'd
           then
           they
           are
           :
           and
           some
           can
           love
           without
           being
           
           jealous
           :
           some
           are
           for
           a
           jo●und
           Humor
           ,
           not
           regarding
           Beauty
           ;
           others
           love
           a
           mild
           ,
           others
           a
           Confident
           Behaviour
           .
           Some
           by
           spending
           their
           time
           altogether
           in
           the
           sport
           of
           Love
           ;
           others
           tho
           late
           ,
           and
           when
           they
           have
           spent
           their
           whole
           Estates
           ,
           come
           to
           their
           Senses
           again
           .
           With
           such
           variety
           of
           Passions
           does
           
           Bettyland-Love
           transport
           the
           Minds
           of
           her
           Inhabitants
           .
        
         
           The
           Shepherds
           and
           Shepherdesses
           are
           also
           very
           great
           Lyers
           generally
           throughout
           the
           whole
           Territory
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           for
           they
           make
           no
           more
           of
           an
           Oath
           ,
           a
           Vow
           ,
           or
           a
           Protestation
           ,
           than
           a
           
           Sussex
           ●umpkin
           does
           of
           a
           pudding-Cake
           in
           a
           morning
           for
           his
           Breakfast
           .
           They
           are
           used
           in
           the
           Sieges
           of
           Betty-land
           Love
           to
           blow
           up
           the
           fortresses
           of
           Chastity
           ,
           like
           barrels
           of
           Powder
           in
           Mines
           :
           if
           the
           Female
           have
           the
           handling
           of
           them
           ,
           you
           shall
           ●ee
           a
           
           foolish
           Husbandmans
           Guinneys
           fly
           in
           the
           Air
           like
           Opdam
           and
           his
           ships-Company
           .
        
         
           As
           for
           Matrimony
           ,
           the
           true
           Natives
           of
           Betty-land
           neither
           Male
           nor
           Female
           do
           admire
           it
           ;
           for
           the
           old
           Sages
           of
           the
           Country
           say
           ,
           
             
               Vxorem
               —
               Rosa
               Cinamomum
               veretur
               ,
            
             
               Quicquid
               quaeritur
               optimum
               videtur
               .
            
          
        
         
           And
           indeed
           the
           Fetters
           of
           Ceremony
           are
           utterly
           disagreeable
           to
           the
           frank
           humor
           of
           the
           Inhabitants
           of
           this
           Country
           ,
           for
           they
           being
           a
           less
           sort
           of
           People
           ,
           reject
           all
           Laws
           of
           Convenience
           ,
           when
           they
           are
           repugnant
           to
           their
           own
           Appetites
           ;
           and
           falsly
           mistaking
           the
           instinct
           of
           Nature
           ,
           for
           the
           Law
           of
           Nature
           ,
           as
           idly
           cry
           out
           ,
           that
           the
           Law
           of
           Convenience
           must
           submit
           to
           the
           Law
           of
           Nature
           :
           taking
           the
           instinct
           or
           impulse
           of
           Nature
           ,
           which
           is
           effrene
           and
           ranging
           ,
           
           for
           the
           Law
           of
           Nature
           ,
           which
           is
           curbing
           and
           restraining
           ;
           which
           makes
           use
           of
           Laws
           of
           Convenience
           ,
           to
           put
           a
           
             Nil
             ultra
          
           to
           Exorbitance
           ;
           but
           like
           Phleggus
           in
           Virgil
           preaching
           in
           Hell
           with
           his
           
             dis●●
             Iusti●iam
             moniti
          
           ,
           —
           what
           does
           this
           grave
           Cosmographer
           do
           here
           talking
           to
           a
           company
           of
           hair-brain'd
           Mad-caps
           ?
           Epicures
           ,
           with
           Gadb●●s
           in
           their
           Tails
           ?
           who
           following
           the
           Examples
           of
           the
           greatest
           Husbandmen
           and
           Huswi●es
           in
           the
           world
           ,
           as
           of
           Hannibal
           at
           
             Capua
             ,
             Achilles
          
           and
           
             Briseis
             ,
             Caesar
          
           and
           
             Cleopatra
             ,
             Hercules
             &
             Iole
             ,
             Ladislaus
          
           of
           
             Poland
             ,
             Charles
          
           the
           VIII
           .
           &
           thousands
           more
           ,
           will
           be
           never
           induc'd
           to
           believe
           that
           so
           famous
           and
           so
           many
           Husbandmen
           could
           err
           ,
           nor
           ever
           be
           perswaded
           to
           swerve
           from
           manifold
           Examples
           ,
           epecially
           
             Magnis
             cum
             subeant
             animos
             autoribus
             .
          
        
         
           And
           therefore
           a
           great
           Author
           
           speaking
           of
           the
           chiefest
           Husbandmen
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           casts
           a
           Sardonish
           Smile
           upon
           all
           those
           that
           should
           endeavour
           to
           work
           a
           Reformation
           in
           that
           Country
           ,
           accompting
           it
           as
           ridiculous
           a
           Labor
           ,
           as
           for
           Quakers
           to
           attempt
           to
           Convert
           the
           Pope
           ,
           for
           saith
           he
           —
           
             Tam
             levia
             habentur
             a
             Pudeos
             matrimonii
             jura
             ,
             ut
             prae
             libito
             veras
             uxores
             repudiant
             ,
             mutent
             atque
             permutent
             ,
             filias
             filiasque
             tot
             Nuptiis
             copulant
             &
             recopulant
             ,
             ut
             nescire
             rogamur
             ubi
             verum
             cohaereat
             illorum
             Matrimonium
             .
          
        
         
           However
           they
           want
           not
           a
           good
           Excuse
           ,
           and
           say
           that
           where
           Nature
           is
           lac'd
           too
           strait
           with
           the
           Bodise
           of
           Convenience
           ,
           she
           ought
           not
           to
           be
           put
           into
           ●its
           ,
           for
           want
           of
           a
           little
           Liberty
           .
           And
           that
           many
           times
           occasion
           requires
           that
           the
           
           Law
           should
           be
           cut
           ,
           rather
           than
           leisurely
           undone
           .
           That
           the
           strictness
           of
           the
           Law
           of
           Convenience
           begets
           a
           haughty
           Usurpation
           of
           the
           meaner
           Sex
           over
           their
           Superiors
           ,
           which
           is
           more
           repugnant
           than
           any
           Convenience
           can
           be
           agreeable
           to
           the
           Law
           of
           Nature
           :
           That
           there
           is
           no
           better
           way
           for
           the
           husbandmen
           of
           Betty-land
           to
           curb
           that
           Usurpation
           ,
           then
           to
           show
           their
           Usurpers
           how
           far
           they
           can
           expand
           their
           Favors
           .
           As
           for
           that
           thing
           call'd
           Equality
           ,
           the
           Husbandmen
           of
           
             Betty
             land
          
           spurn
           it
           under
           their
           feet
           ,
           and
           call
           him
           
             Boc●a
             de
             porco
          
           ,
           that
           first
           made
           mention
           of
           it
           :
           for
           say
           they
           ,
           if
           you
           weigh
           in
           a
           just
           Ballance
           ▪
           the
           Majesty
           of
           Masculine
           Form
           ,
           the
           Latitude
           of
           his
           Understanding
           ,
           the
           Preheminence
           of
           his
           Original
           ,
           the
           Power
           of
           his
           Actual
           Protection
           ,
           with
           the
           Chiefest
           Perfections
           of
           the
           Female
           Sex
           ;
           what
           will
           
           become
           of
           that
           hen-peckt
           En●omium
           of
           Equality
           ?
           They
           add
           farther
           ,
           That
           Agrippa
           for
           his
           Treatise
           
             de
             praecellentia
             foeminei
             sexus
          
           ought
           to
           have
           made
           as
           publick
           a
           Recantation
           ,
           as
           he
           does
           for
           his
           Books
           of
           Occult
           Philosophy
           .
           If
           their
           Admirers
           object
           the
           incomparable
           Fabricature
           of
           that
           particular
           part
           where
           human
           Off-spring
           is
           concern'd
           ,
           't
           is
           no
           more
           then
           if
           you
           should
           ●dmire
           that
           most
           curious
           piece
           of
           Natures
           workmanship
           ,
           the
           head
           of
           a
           Fly
           ,
           which
           is
           all
           the
           while
           but
           the
           head
           of
           a
           Fly.
           
        
         
           Thus
           you
           see
           Opinions
           were
           always
           at
           war
           one
           with
           another
           ,
           and
           it
           is
           only
           the
           Clue
           of
           understanding
           ,
           that
           must
           lead
           you
           through
           the
           vast
           Labyrinths
           of
           national
           Customs
           .
           The
           native
           Shepherdesses
           of
           Betty-land
           desire
           vehemently
           ,
           Love
           but
           indifferently
           and
           very
           unconstantly
           :
           yet
           whether
           they
           Love
           ,
           or
           whether
           they
           
           hate
           ,
           they
           will
           dissemble
           with
           the
           most
           politick
           Shepherd
           that
           ever
           was
           known
           in
           all
           Arcadia
           .
           But
           where
           they
           do
           Love
           out
           of
           Affection
           (
           which
           is
           very
           seldome
           )
           they
           will
           venture
           through
           fire
           and
           water
           :
           I
           have
           known
           ,
           said
           Eumolphus
           ,
           when
           a
           Shepherd
           has
           been
           cast
           into
           Prison
           for
           a
           Crime
           that
           deserved
           Death
           ;
           his
           Partner
           Shepherdess
           has
           workt
           his
           Escape
           ,
           and
           been
           condemn'd
           in
           his
           stead
           ,
           as
           the
           Law
           in
           some
           part
           of
           Betty-land
           requires
           .
           Their
           Tongues
           are
           the
           most
           certain
           Evidence
           of
           perpetual
           motion
           ,
           if
           a
           thing
           may
           be
           said
           to
           move
           that
           never
           lies
           still
           :
           and
           the
           subjects
           of
           their
           Discourse
           ,
           the
           highest
           Secrets
           in
           nature
           .
           Such
           are
           the
           Mysteries
           of
           combing
           and
           shading
           Hair
           ,
           of
           Washes
           for
           their
           Faces
           ,
           large
           Comments
           upon
           new
           Gowns
           ;
           Censures
           upon
           one
           anothers
           Dressing
           and
           Behaviour
           :
           Punctilio's
           of
           Ceremonies
           when
           
           to
           give
           the
           Lip
           ,
           when
           the
           Cheek
           ,
           descants
           upon
           the
           warmth
           or
           coldness
           of
           their
           Shepherds
           Affections
           :
           when
           they
           grow
           old
           ,
           then
           they
           'l
           spend
           their
           time
           in
           telling
           how
           handsome
           they
           were
           when
           they
           were
           young
           .
           How
           many
           Amintases
           courted
           them
           ,
           and
           how
           many
           poor
           Shepherds
           broke
           their
           Hearts
           for
           them
           :
           but
           if
           a
           Shepherd
           displease
           them
           ,
           they
           will
           sing
           him
           such
           Cromatique
           descant
           ,
           will
           make
           his
           Ears
           tingle
           ;
           they
           will
           ring
           him
           such
           peals
           that
           he
           had
           better
           sit
           in
           a
           Steeple
           with
           the
           noise
           of
           six
           Bells
           about
           his
           Ears
           :
           but
           on
           the
           other
           side
           ,
           they
           are
           very
           good
           natur'd
           ,
           for
           if
           you
           do
           but
           now
           and
           then
           ,
           that
           is
           ,
           once
           in
           a
           month
           ▪
           or
           so
           give
           them
           a
           fine
           Gown
           ,
           a
           rich
           Petticoat
           ,
           a
           rich
           Looking-Glass
           ,
           a
           rich
           set
           of
           Chairs
           ,
           or
           any
           such
           Bauble
           ▪
           you
           shall
           win
           their
           very
           Hearts
           :
           give
           them
           but
           a
           Neck-Lace
           of
           Pearl
           ,
           and
           look
           how
           
           many
           Pearls
           there
           be
           upon
           the
           string
           ,
           they
           shall
           give
           you
           so
           many
           kisses
           for
           them
           ;
           which
           is
           a
           great
           sign
           of
           a
           tender
           Disposition
           .
           They
           have
           an
           excellent
           Art
           of
           making
           of
           Horns
           ,
           at
           which
           they
           are
           very
           industrious
           ,
           so
           that
           many
           of
           them
           get
           very
           good
           Livings
           by
           it
           ;
           And
           as
           for
           Astrology
           ,
           there
           's
           none
           of
           your
           Bookers
           ,
           or
           Lillies
           could
           ever
           come
           near
           them
           ;
           for
           they
           'l
           tell
           a
           Shepherd
           his
           fortune
           to
           ●
           hairs
           breadth
           :
           to
           which
           purpose
           they
           will
           lye
           an
           hour
           together
           sometimes
           upon
           their
           backs
           ,
           considering
           the
           motions
           of
           the
           Stars
           .
           Many
           of
           your
           Betty-land
           Shepherdesses
           are
           deeply
           Learn'd
           ,
           for
           having
           nothing
           else
           to
           do
           as
           they
           sit
           upon
           the
           Plains
           ,
           they
           are
           always
           reading
           
             Cassandra
             ,
             Ibrahim
             Bassa
             ,
             Grand
             Cyrus
             ,
             Amadis
             de
             Gaule
             ,
             Hero
             and
             Leander
             ,
             the
             School
             of
             Venu●
             ,
          
           and
           the
           rest
           of
           these
           classick
           Authors
           ;
           by
           which
           they
           are
           
           mightily
           improv'd
           both
           in
           Practice
           and
           Discourse
           .
           Put
           them
           to
           their
           shifts
           and
           they
           are
           the
           be●t
           in
           the
           world
           at
           an
           Intreague
           or
           stratagem
           .
           Ah!
           says
           the
           poor
           Soldier
           in
           Petronius
           that
           had
           neglected
           his
           Duty
           ,
           to
           comfort
           a
           poor
           Shepherdess
           that
           had
           been
           bewailing
           the
           death
           of
           her
           dear
           Melibeus
           for
           three
           weeks
           together
           :
           Here
           while
           I
           have
           been
           spending
           my
           time
           to
           comfort
           thee
           the
           most
           distressed
           Shepherdess
           in
           the
           world
           ,
           they
           have
           stole
           the
           Criminal
           from
           the
           Cross
           whom
           I
           was
           set
           to
           watch
           ,
           and
           now
           must
           I
           be
           Crucified
           for
           him
           :
           But
           she
           reliev'd
           him
           presently
           .
           Rather
           than
           so
           ,
           quoth
           she
           with
           tears
           in
           her
           Eyes
           ,
           here
           take
           my
           poor
           beloved
           Shepherd
           and
           hang
           him
           up
           in
           the
           others
           place
           ,
           death
           makes
           no
           distinction
           of
           faces
           .
           No
           less
           witty
           was
           the
           Shepherdess
           in
           Boccace
           ,
           who
           loving
           a
           Shepherd
           ,
           yet
           knowing
           not
           how
           to
           let
           him
           understand
           it
           ,
           went
           to
           
           one
           of
           the
           Priests
           of
           Pan
           ,
           telling
           him
           it
           was
           his
           Duty
           to
           rebuke
           such
           Shepherds
           as
           should
           attempt
           the
           Chastity
           of
           any
           Shepherdesses
           in
           Arcadia
           ,
           Look
           here
           ,
           quoth
           she
           ,
           such
           a
           Shepherd
           sent
           me
           this
           Purse
           of
           Gold
           ,
           but
           I
           defie
           him
           and
           his
           Gold
           ;
           call
           him
           Father
           and
           school
           him
           severely
           .
           The
           poor
           Priest
           did
           so
           ,
           the
           cunning
           Shepherd
           smeling
           the
           Rat
           smiled
           to
           himself
           ,
           but
           outwardly
           promis'd
           to
           d●sist
           ,
           when
           the
           Shepherdess
           next
           day
           comes
           again
           and
           tells
           the
           Paiest
           ,
           She
           wondred
           he
           would
           be
           so
           neglectful
           in
           his
           Duty
           :
           Why
           ,
           quoth
           the
           Priest
           ,
           I
           call'd
           him
           ,
           chid
           him
           ,
           and
           he
           promised
           never
           more
           to
           Molest
           your
           quiet
           .
           Alas
           ,
           quoth
           she
           ,
           but
           the
           last
           night
           ,
           he
           got
           in
           o're
           the
           Garden
           ,
           climbes
           a
           Fig
           Tree
           that
           grows
           under
           my
           Window
           ,
           and
           had
           got
           into
           my
           Chamber
           had
           I
           not
           happily
           espy'd
           him
           and
           shut
           the
           Casement
           .
           The
           Shepherd
           was
           call'd
           again
           ,
           rebuk't
           
           and
           chid
           ,
           but
           you
           may
           easily
           guess
           at
           the
           end
           of
           his
           sorrow
           :
           but
           you
           must
           not
           think
           I
           have
           a
           Lords
           Estate
           to
           buy
           paper
           enough
           to
           set
           down
           all
           the
           Stratagems
           ,
           Devices
           and
           Wiles
           of
           the
           S●epherdesses
           in
           Betty-land
           :
           And
           therefore
           you
           must
           apply
           your self
           to
           the
           Learning
           of
           that
           Country
           ,
           and
           when
           you
           have
           read
           nothing
           else
           for
           5
           years
           together
           ,
           then
           if
           demanded
           you
           may
           perhaps
           be
           able
           to
           give
           an
           Account
           thereof
           .
        
         
           The
           young
           Shepherdesses
           of
           Betty-land
           are
           very
           studious
           in
           Net-work
           ,
           Vulcan's
           Net
           was
           a
           piece
           of
           Bot●hery
           to
           their
           Art
           ▪
           They
           are
           made
           of
           Glances
           ,
           Smiles
           ,
           and
           the
           curling
           Hair
           of
           their
           own
           Locks
           so
           delicately
           twisted
           together
           ,
           that
           all
           the
           Skill
           of
           Ar●ch●e
           cannot
           compare
           with
           them
           :
           Of
           these
           Net-makers
           the
           Farmer
           Homer
           makes
           mention
           in
           his
           Book
           of
           
           Betty-land
           Agriculture
           call'd
           the
           Iliads
           .
        
         
           
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
            
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
            
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
               .
            
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
               .
            
          
           
             
               Then
               from
               her
               Breast
               her
               Mantle
               she
               unloos'd
               ,
            
             
               And
               from
               her
               Bosom
               Charming
               Arts
               diffus'd
               :
            
             
               Alluring
               Glances
               ,
               Mirth
               deluding
               Smiles
               ,
            
             
               And
               flattering
               Speech
               that
               Wisdom
               oft
               beguiles
               .
            
          
        
         
           The
           first
           Net-makers
           in
           the
           world
           were
           Venus
           among
           the
           Gods
           ,
           and
           Pandora
           upon
           Earth
           ,
           who
           tho
           they
           were
           no
           Nuns
           ▪
           yet
           their
           
           workmanship
           for
           Curiosity
           and
           Fineness
           was
           far
           beyond
           any
           thi●g
           that
           ever
           was
           made
           in
           any
           Nunnery
           through
           the
           whole
           Empire
           of
           Betty-land
           .
           That
           Box
           of
           hers
           had
           such
           a
           confounded
           company
           of
           Trinkets
           in
           it
           ,
           that
           the
           wo●ld
           had
           better
           have
           wanted
           fire
           ,
           and
           never
           tasted
           Rostmeat
           ,
           then
           to
           be
           so
           punisht
           as
           it
           has
           been
           ,
           for
           Prometheus
           stealing
           only
           a
           few
           lighted
           Charcoal
           out
           of
           Iove's
           Kitchin
           (
           shame
           for
           his
           weak
           stomach
           that
           could
           not
           eat
           raw
           Victuals
           .
           )
           For
           the
           poor
           Farmers
           in
           Betty-land
           have
           rued
           the
           price
           of
           hot
           Ca●dles
           ever
           since
           .
           But
           there
           are
           a
           sort
           of
           elderly
           Shepherdess●s
           in
           this
           Country
           ,
           which
           in
           the
           Spanish
           part
           of
           Bettyland
           are
           called
           Maquerela's
           ,
           that
           with
           a
           force
           irresistible
           carry
           all
           before
           them
           .
           Their
           proceedings
           are
           Militant
           ,
           for
           they
           Besiege
           ,
           Assault
           ,
           Batter
           ,
           Mine
           ,
           and
           Countermine
           ,
           and
           as
           
           if
           Victory
           were
           Entail'd
           upon
           them
           ,
           they
           never
           fail
           of
           Success
           :
           Insomuch
           that
           their
           continual
           Conquests
           gave
           occasion
           to
           the
           Husbandmen
           of
           Greek
           Bettyland
           to
           ●ffirm
           that
           Cupid
           had
           rob'd
           all
           the
           Gods
           of
           their
           Arms.
           
        
         
           
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
               ▪
            
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
               .
            
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
               .
            
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
               .
            
          
           
             
               Behold
               poor
               Gods
               how
               they
               unarmed
               stand
               !
            
             
               Spoil'd
               of
               their
               Arms
               by
               Love
               of
               Betty-land
               :
            
             
               Phaebus
               his
               Quiver
               ,
               Jove
               his
               Thunder
               misses
               ;
            
             
               His
               Corslet
               Mars
               and
               Helmet
               pawns
               for
               Kisses
               ;
            
             
             
               
               Jove's
               Son
               lays
               down
               his
               Club
               for
               Nanny-Cock
               ,
            
             
               And
               Neptunes
               Trident
               yields
               to
               Holland
               Smock
               :
            
             
               Bacchus
               will
               give
               his
               Thyrsis
               for
               a
               Slut
               ,
            
             
               And
               Hermes
               Heels
               a
               Wench
               his
               wings
               shall
               Cut
               ;
            
             
               The
               Chast
               Diana
               will
               not
               go
               a
               Hunting
            
             
               At
               th'
               hour
               appointed
               when
               to
               meet
               her
               Bunting
               :
            
             
               If
               thus
               the
               Gods
               to
               Cupid
               yield
               their
               Arms
               ,
            
             
               How
               can
               weak
               Mortals
               think
               ye
               scape
               his
               Charms
               ?
            
          
        
         
           The
           most
           Renowned
           of
           these
           Elderly
           Shepherdesses
           was
           
             Y●leped
             Hecate
          
           ,
           who
           after
           the
           Mode
           of
           later
           times
           (
           for
           Fashions
           like
           the
           Spheres
           have
           their
           Circular
           Motions
           )
           had
           always
           a
           kennel
           of
           lap-Dogs
           at
           her
           Tail
           —
           
             
             
               —
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
            
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
               .
            
             
               —
               And
               a●
               her
               Table
               fed
               ,
            
             
               A
               Cry
               of
               yelping
               Shocks
               eat
               poor
               folks
               bread
               .
            
          
           Such
           is
           the
           Efficacy
           of
           their
           Charms
           ,
           so
           much
           Courage
           in
           one
           of
           their
           Pos●e●s
           ,
           so
           much
           warmth
           in
           one
           of
           their
           Jellies
           ;
           such
           the
           force
           of
           their
           Perswasion
           ,
           that
           had
           Vlysses
           met
           with
           one
           of
           these
           Betty-land
           Shepherdesses
           of
           the
           right
           stamp
           ,
           his
           poor
           Shepherdess
           Penelope
           might
           have
           spun
           more
           sheets
           in
           Expectation
           of
           him
           ,
           than
           ever
           she
           was
           like
           to
           make
           use
           of
           .
           Thus
           therefore
           that
           subtle
           Man
           Ovid
           describes
           them
           ,
           
             
               
                 Nec
                 mora
                 miseri
                 
                   tosti
                
                 jubet
                 hordea
                 Grani
                 ,
              
               
                 Mellaque
                 vinique
                 meri
                 cum
                 lacte
                 coagulo
                 passo
                 ;
              
               
               
                 Quique
                 sub
                 hac
                 lateant
                 furtim
                 dulcedine
                 succos
              
               
                 Adjicit
                 ,
                 accipimus
                 sacra
                 data
                 Pocula
                 dextra
                 .
              
            
             
               
                 Without
                 delay
                 so
                 many
                 Grains
                 of
                 Pearl
                 ,
              
               
                 With
                 Rubies
                 mixt
                 she
                 strait
                 presents
                 the
                 Girl
                 ;
              
               
                 She
                 showrs
                 sweet
                 Hony
                 and
                 the
                 strongest
                 Wine
                 ,
              
               
                 Words
                 may
                 prevail
                 ,
                 but
                 if
                 she
                 drinks
                 she's
                 thine
                 .
              
               
                 Lady's
                 must
                 drink
                 no
                 Wine
                 ,
                 no
                 Wine
                 cry
                 they
                 ;
              
               
                 Yet
                 Lady's
                 sure
                 may
                 drink
                 a
                 draught
                 of
                 Whey
                 .
              
               
                 Has
                 Whey
                 such
                 force
                 ?
                 no
                 ,
                 something
                 she
                 steals
                 in
                 ,
              
               
                 For
                 soon
                 as
                 drank
                 it
                 tickles
                 all
                 the
                 Skin
                 .
              
            
          
        
         
           They
           appear
           in
           all
           Colours
           like
           Cameleons
           ,
           in
           all
           shapes
           like
           she
           -
           
           Proteus's
           ;
           not
           that
           you
           are
           to
           
           think
           that
           these
           are
           of
           that
           sort
           of
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           which
           the
           Hu●bandman
           Homer
           calls
           Syrens
           ,
           but
           of
           a
           far
           more
           queint
           and
           curious
           Ingenuity
           :
           for
           those
           Syrens
           seem
           〈◊〉
           be
           a
           poor
           kind
           of
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           like
           those
           that
           were
           wont
           to
           haunt
           the
           Plains
           of
           
           Lutiners-Lane
           and
           Cole
           -
           Yard
           ,
           by
           their
           ordinary
           language
           and
           impudent
           beckning
           to
           Vlysses
           as
           he
           passed
           by
           their
           doors
           ,
           who
           can
           otherwise
           expound
           the
           place
           ?
        
         
           
             
               
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
                 〈◊〉
              
               .
               &c.
               
            
          
           
             
               Here
               ,
               Chuck
               Vlysses
               ,
               here
               come
               in
               and
               see
               ;
            
             
               What
               Pots
               of
               jet
               ,
               what
               nut-brown
               Ale
               have
               we
               :
            
             
               For
               never
               Mariner
               return'd
               on
               shore
               ,
            
             
               But
               he
               came
               here
               to
               look
               him
               out
               a
               Whore.
            
             
             
               Come
               in
               then
               Ioy
               ,
               and
               spend
               thy
               Pot
               with
               us
               ,
            
             
               We
               'l
               sometimes
               sing
               a
               Song
               ,
               and
               sometimes
               buss
               .
            
          
        
         
           As
           these
           words
           were
           translated
           ,
           in
           comes
           Eumolpus
           ,
           views
           them
           ,
           and
           swears
           there
           could
           be
           no
           other
           Interpretation
           of
           the
           words
           .
           To
           make
           it
           out
           ,
           I
           will
           give
           you
           a
           description
           of
           these
           Syre●s
           and
           their
           Habitations
           ,
           which
           exceed
           the
           number
           of
           all
           others
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           by
           the
           progress
           and
           experience
           of
           my
           own
           Travels
           :
           when
           I
           was
           ve●y
           young
           ,
           quoth
           Eumolpus
           ,
           I
           fell
           into
           the
           acquaintance
           of
           Eucolpius
           ,
           and
           Trimaley
           ,
           Husbandmen
           of
           la●ge
           Experience
           ,
           and
           who
           had
           been
           great
           Travellers
           in
           the
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           g●owing
           familiar
           as
           one
           that
           had
           received
           —
           
             Istum
             telis
             Veneris
          
           .
        
         
           It
           was
           not
           long
           e're
           I
           discovered
           to
           them
           the
           great
           desire
           I
           had
           to
           
           know
           the
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           of
           which
           I
           had
           heard
           and
           read
           so
           much
           .
           They
           asked
           me
           what
           substance
           my
           friends
           had
           left
           me
           to
           bear
           Expences
           ,
           for
           the
           Journey
           would
           be
           tedious
           and
           chargeable
           .
           I
           bid
           them
           take
           no
           care
           for
           that
           ,
           for
           I
           had
           Lands
           to
           ●ell
           ,
           and
           as
           long
           as
           that
           lasted
           there
           would
           be
           no
           want
           ;
           telling
           them
           withal
           ,
           that
           Knowledge
           is
           better
           than
           fine
           Gold.
           Then
           ,
           replyed
           Eucolpius
           ,
           the
           place
           where
           we
           now
           are
           ,
           is
           one
           of
           the
           most
           remarkable
           Cities
           in
           all
           Betty-land
           ,
           and
           therefore
           dear
           Eumolpus
           ,
           rest
           thy self
           assured
           of
           the
           best
           Assistance
           I
           can
           befriend
           thee
           with
           :
           so
           in
           the
           depth
           of
           the
           Winter-quarter
           within
           an
           hour
           after
           day-light
           shut
           in
           we
           set
           forward
           .
           To
           remember
           the
           several
           by-ways
           and
           turnings
           through
           which
           we
           went
           ,
           it
           is
           as
           impossible
           as
           for
           a
           man
           to
           remember
           thing●
           done
           before
           he
           was
           born
           ,
           at
           length
           
           we
           came
           to
           a
           good
           large
           Habitation
           ,
           which
           seemed
           like
           an
           enchanted
           Castle
           :
           for
           tho
           we
           understood
           that
           there
           were
           many
           of
           the
           Inhabitants
           of
           Betty-land
           in
           the
           house
           ,
           yet
           there
           was
           as
           a
           deep
           silence
           as
           in
           a
           Temple
           .
           We
           were
           no
           sooner
           entred
           (
           for
           the
           doors
           of
           these
           houses
           are
           seldom
           shut
           ,
           as
           being
           haunted
           with
           a
           continual
           sort
           of
           Strangers
           )
           but
           there
           appeared
           to
           us
           a
           young
           Syren
           ,
           which
           put
           us
           in
           mind
           of
           that
           Verse
           in
           
             Ovid
             ,
             Monstra
             maris
             Syrenes
             erant
             .
          
           The
           Syrens
           were
           strange
           Monsters
           bred
           out
           of
           the
           froth
           of
           the
           Sea
           ,
           or
           rather
           Monste●s
           of
           the
           Sea
           ,
           
             
               Seeing
               that
               there
               are
               none
               of
               all
            
             
               That
               walk
               on
               Land
               which
               they
               can
               Father
               call
               .
            
          
        
         
           She
           was
           as
           black
           as
           a
           Lobster
           before
           't
           is
           boil'd
           ,
           and
           instead
           of
           hands
           had
           much
           such
           kind
           of
           Claws
           ,
           and
           her
           head
           lookt
           like
           a
           Gorgons
           Per●iwig
           with
           Snakes
           ,
           she
           lookt
           as
           
           if
           she
           had
           been
           eaten
           and
           spew'd
           up
           again
           ,
           or
           as
           if
           she
           had
           been
           one
           of
           those
           upon
           whom
           the
           Venifices
           of
           Betty-land
           were
           wont
           to
           try
           their
           Potions
           ;
           and
           yet
           she
           had
           the
           confidence
           to
           invite
           us
           to
           drink
           of
           her
           Cups
           .
           Eumolpus
           did
           not
           much
           mind
           her
           Courtesie
           ,
           but
           askt
           Eucolpius
           whether
           that
           were
           not
           the
           Cumaean
           Witch
           that
           accompanied
           Aeneas
           through
           Hell
           :
           How
           ,
           reply'd
           Eucolpius
           ,
           does
           she
           look
           old
           enough
           to
           be
           a
           Sybil
           ?
           yet
           there
           are
           some
           of
           the
           poor
           labouring
           Mechanick
           Inhabitants
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           will
           be
           glad
           of
           ●
           worse
           than
           that
           Syren
           .
           With
           that
           calling
           her
           by
           her
           name
           ,
           Quartilla
           ,
           said
           he
           ,
           where
           is
           Thelxinoe
           ?
           for
           so
           was
           the
           old
           Syren
           called
           .
           She
           knew
           his
           Voice
           ,
           and
           streit
           appears
           the
           Great
           —
           
             Bellua
             Leinae
             —
             Horrendum
             stridens
          
           .
        
         
           A
           ruinous
           piece
           of
           Antiquity
           with
           a
           Voice
           as
           hoarse
           as
           if
           her
           throat
           
           had
           been
           lin'd
           with
           Seal
           Skins
           :
           she
           had
           as
           much
           flesh
           below
           her
           Chin
           ,
           as
           would
           have
           serv'd
           to
           have
           made
           another
           Face
           :
           she
           was
           pufft
           up
           like
           a
           shoulder
           of
           Veal
           blown
           up
           with
           a
           Tobacco-Pipe
           ,
           yet
           was
           her
           Language
           as
           soft
           as
           Lambs-Wool
           to
           Eucolpius
           ,
           who
           enquir'd
           of
           her
           ,
           where
           such
           and
           such
           Syrens
           were
           ,
           and
           how
           they
           did
           :
           shall
           I
           send
           for
           such
           a
           one
           ,
           quoth
           she
           ?
           do
           ,
           cries
           Eucolpius
           ,
           Fly
           ,
           then
           cry'd
           Thelxinoe
           ,
           to
           the
           deform'd
           Syren
           that
           first
           admitted
           us
           ,
           and
           bid
           Sylvagia
           appear
           ,
           hast
           her
           hither
           .
           All
           this
           while
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           we
           were
           in
           the
           common-Room
           ,
           which
           put
           him
           in
           mind
           of
           that
           description
           of
           the
           Syrens
           habitation
           in
           Virgil
           ,
           
             
               Iamque
               adeo
               scopulos
               Syrenum
               advecta
               subibat
               ,
            
             
               Difficiles
               quondam
               multorumque
               o●ssibus
               albos
               .
            
             
             
               Most
               dangerous
               Rocks
               which
               mortals
               never
               baulk
               ,
            
             
               Till
               all
               the
               walls
               grow
               white
               with
               score
               and
               Chalk
               .
            
          
        
         
           But
           when
           the
           little
           Syren
           ,
           said
           he
           (
           continuing
           his
           relation
           )
           was
           gone
           forth
           ,
           Thelxinoe
           carried
           us
           into
           her
           own
           Apartment
           ,
           a
           place
           not
           very
           illustriously
           accoutred
           ,
           nor
           yet
           over
           meanly
           set
           forth
           .
           There
           hung
           against
           the
           wall
           a
           good
           fair
           Looking-Glass
           ,
           and
           in
           the
           window
           were
           to
           be
           seen
           two
           dirty
           Combs
           ▪
           the
           most
           peculiar
           Utensils
           belonging
           to
           a
           Syren
           .
           The
           Bed
           (
           which
           was
           the
           best
           thing
           in
           the
           Room
           ,
           as
           being
           a
           piece
           of
           Furniture
           of
           which
           they
           make
           the
           greatest
           use
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           )
           lay
           as
           if
           it
           had
           b●●n
           but
           lately
           tumbled
           ,
           which
           Eucolpius
           perceiving
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           smiling
           upon
           Thelxinoe
           ,
           who
           was
           here
           last
           ?
           There
           ,
           quoth
           she
           ,
           who
           dost
           think
           ,
           but
           my
           Vlysses
           and
           I
           ?
           your
           
           Vlysses
           quoth
           he
           ,
           who
           's
           that
           ?
           for
           Eucolpius
           knew
           that
           she
           had
           had
           no
           Husbandman
           to
           manure
           her
           ground
           for
           many
           years
           together
           ,
           only
           day-Labourers
           that
           wrought
           at
           so
           much
           an
           hour
           .
           But
           she
           to
           stop
           
           Eucolpius's
           mouth
           ,
           in
           a
           great
           rage
           demanded
           of
           him
           what
           sort
           of
           Liquor
           he
           would
           have
           ,
           and
           immediately
           fetcht
           in
           half
           a
           dozen
           Bottles
           of
           Stepony
           ,
           a
           most
           bewitching
           Juice
           ,
           which
           as
           soon
           as
           the
           Bottles
           were
           loose
           ,
           flew
           up
           with
           so
           much
           violence
           against
           the
           Ceeling
           ,
           as
           if
           they
           had
           bid
           defiance
           to
           the
           Clouds
           ,
           such
           a
           shower
           of
           spirited
           water
           rain'd
           upward
           against
           the
           course
           of
           nature
           :
           so
           that
           a
           whole
           Bottle
           scarce
           yielded
           enough
           to
           wet
           the
           bottom
           of
           a
           Glass
           ,
           yet
           would
           the
           Syren
           not
           ba●e
           a
           farthing
           of
           her
           price
           ,
           which
           was
           a
           round
           shilling
           for
           every
           Bottle
           .
           After
           that
           she
           brought
           in
           six
           more
           Bottles
           ,
           which
           behav'd
           themselves
           
           after
           the
           same
           rude
           manner
           ▪
           Eucolpius
           who
           well
           knew
           the
           Effects
           of
           the
           Syrens
           Charms
           ,
           call'd
           for
           the
           tamer
           Juice
           of
           Barley
           ,
           over
           which
           ,
           said
           Eucolpius
           ,
           after
           we
           had
           continued
           till
           it
           was
           very
           late
           ,
           enchanted
           with
           the
           pleasant
           Discourses
           of
           the
           Syrens
           ,
           on
           a
           sudden
           we
           heard
           a
           great
           noise
           in
           the
           room
           over
           head
           as
           if
           the
           Sky
           had
           been
           falling
           .
           Two
           Shepherds
           of
           Betty-land
           belike
           had
           been
           there
           for
           several
           hours
           together
           ,
           with
           each
           two
           Syrens
           in
           the●●
           Company
           ,
           where
           they
           had
           drank
           so
           long
           of
           the
           Syrens
           bewitching
           Liquor
           ,
           that
           they
           were
           ev'n
           almost
           〈◊〉
           into
           swine
           .
           Then
           ,
           said
           Eumolpius
           ,
           I
           began
           to
           call
           to
           mind
           those
           other
           Lines
           of
           Virgil.
           
        
         
           
             Hinc
             exaudiri
             Gemitus
             
               iraque
            
             leonum
             ,
          
           
             Vinola
             recusantum
             ,
             at
             sera
             sub
             nocte
             rudentum
             ,
          
           
           
             Setegerique
             sues
             atque
             in
             presepibus
             ursi
          
           
             Se
             vice
             —
          
           
             Then
             shrieks
             of
             Bum-kickt
             Iades
             were
             loudly
             heard
             ,
          
           
             And
             late
             at
             night
             the
             damning
             Hectors
             roar
             ,
          
           
             To
             see
             the
             Constables
             with
             Chains
             prepar'd
             ,
          
           
             Now
             worse
             than
             Swine
             that
             were
             but
             Beasts
             before
             .
          
        
         
           For
           like
           to
           this
           ,
           cry'd
           Eucolpius
           ,
           was
           the
           noise
           which
           we
           heard
           above
           stairs
           :
           the
           Syrens
           squeak'd
           and
           cry'd
           out
           murder
           ,
           and
           help
           ,
           and
           help
           ,
           and
           murder
           .
           The
           Shepherds
           ranted
           and
           tore
           ,
           seeing
           that
           they
           had
           lost
           their
           Mony
           ,
           and
           that
           the
           Syrens
           had
           bewitched
           it
           out
           of
           their
           Pockets
           .
           In
           this
           hurly
           burly
           ●p
           runs
           Thelxinoe
           with
           all
           her
           Spells
           ,
           when
           we
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           seeing
           so
           fair
           an
           opportunity
           ,
           and
           considering
           the
           charge
           of
           our
           stay
           ,
           
           took
           an
           occasion
           to
           march
           out
           of
           doors
           ,
           and
           quit
           our selves
           of
           our
           extravagant
           Expence
           :
           but
           Eumolpus
           whose
           blood
           was
           up
           ,
           not
           being
           willing
           to
           give
           over
           the
           Chase
           of
           what
           he
           〈◊〉
           out
           with
           so
           much
           eagerness
           to
           hunt
           for
           ,
           desir'd
           Eucolpius
           to
           bear
           him
           Company
           ,
           in
           the
           search
           of
           some
           other
           Adventure
           .
           It
           was
           now
           late
           ,
           cold
           and
           a
           hard
           Frost
           ,
           but
           these
           hardships
           were
           easily
           over
           come
           by
           the
           brightness
           of
           
           Cynthia's
           Beams
           ,
           that
           made
           the
           night
           almost
           as
           clear
           as
           day
           .
           Being
           thus
           therefore
           got
           safe
           from
           Thelxinoe's
           Habitation
           ,
           Eucolpius
           thought
           it
           convenient
           to
           steer
           his
           Course
           a
           quite
           contrary
           way
           :
           nor
           had
           we
           gone
           far
           ,
           when
           in
           the
           midst
           of
           the
           street
           cry'd
           Eucolpius
           ,
           look
           yo●der
           ,
           where
           that
           Silvadgia
           whom
           we
           sent
           for
           so
           long
           since
           comes
           now
           to
           m●et
           us
           :
           have
           at
           her
           by
           guess
           ,
           quoth
           Eumolpus
           ,
           and
           so
           accosting
           her
           ,
           Whither
           so
           fast
           ,
           quoth
           
           he
           ,
           fair
           Nymph
           ?
           there
           needed
           not
           many
           Complements
           ,
           Eumolpus
           takes
           her
           by
           one
           Hand
           ,
           and
           Eucolpius
           by
           the
           other
           ,
           and
           so
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           we
           march'd
           hand
           in
           hand
           in
           a
           full
           rank
           for
           a
           while
           uninterrupted
           .
           But
           Oh
           the
           fickle
           state
           of
           fortune
           sbeing
           come
           to
           the
           corner
           of
           one
           street
           ,
           who
           should
           pop
           upon
           us
           undiscover'd
           from
           the
           corner
           of
           the
           next
           turning
           ,
           but
           one
           of
           the
           Princes
           of
           that
           night
           with
           all
           his
           Bilboe's
           ?
           It
           was
           time
           to
           let
           go
           the
           hold
           of
           prohibited
           goods
           ,
           so
           near
           a
           strict
           Examination
           .
           Silvadgia
           that
           like
           a
           Mouse
           knew
           every
           hole
           and
           cranny
           thereabouts
           ,
           so
           suddenly
           got
           out
           of
           sight
           ,
           that
           she
           seem'd
           rather
           to
           vanish
           than
           fly
           ,
           but
           said
           
             Eumolpus
             ,
             Eucolpius
          
           and
           I
           were
           forc'd
           to
           stand
           the
           brunt
           .
           The
           Nocturnal
           Prince
           had
           he
           been
           Pluto
           himself
           ,
           could
           not
           have
           pretended
           more
           Majesty
           
             
               —
               Plurima
               mento
            
             
             
               Canities
               inculta
               jacent
               ,
               stant
               lumina
               flamma
               ,
            
             
               Sordidus
               ex
               humeris
               nodo
               dependet
               Amiclus
               .
            
             
               Like
               Bristles
               of
               a
               Hog
               his
               grisled
               Beard
               ,
            
             
               O're-ran
               his
               face
               with
               roapy-Ale
               besmear'd
               :
            
             
               Full
               grim
               he
               lookt
               and
               for
               a
               farther
               note
               ,
            
             
               About
               his
               shoulders
               an
               old
               rusty
               Coat
               .
            
          
           We
           finding
           our selves
           in
           the
           clutches
           of
           such
           a
           Cerberus
           ,
           who
           was
           still
           threatning
           ●o
           shew
           us
           the
           full
           Extent
           of
           his
           Power
           ▪
           and
           to
           send
           us
           to
           the
           house
           of
           Radamanthus
           ,
           of
           which
           houses
           there
           are
           many
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           or
           else
           there
           would
           be
           no
           living
           .
        
         
           Gnosius
           hic
           Radamanthus
           habet
           durissima
           regna
           ,
        
         
           Castigatque
           ,
           audetque
           ,
           dolet
           ,
           subigitque
           fateri
           ,
        
         
         
           Quae
           quis
           apud
           superos
           furta
           letatus
           inani
           ,
        
         
           Distulit
           in
           seram
           commissa
           pericula
           mortem
           .
        
         
           Here
           City
           Marshal
           shows
           his
           cruel
           Power
        
         
           On
           piteous
           Vagabands
           and
           wanting
           Whore
           ,
        
         
           For
           bellies-Crime
           ,
           and
           what
           the
           pocket
           lacks
           ,
        
         
           His
           bloody
           whip-cord
           claws
           their
           Crimson
           backs
           :
        
         
           He
           scourges
           first
           ,
           examins
           next
           ,
           for
           Law
        
         
           They
           none
           deserve
           whom
           Law
           could
           never
           awe
           :
        
         
           And
           hearing
           various
           Crimes
           at
           last
           confest
           ,
        
         
           Becomes
           himself
           the
           subtler
           Knave
           at
           last
           .
        
         
           Upon
           these
           Considerations
           it
           was
           thought
           fit
           to
           use
           gentle
           means
           and
           Sugar-Sops
           ,
           for
           Eumolpus
           had
           learnt
           that
           there
           was
           nothing
           so
           
           frequently
           us'd
           as
           sweet
           Wine
           in
           the
           Sacrifices
           accustomed
           to
           the
           Furies
           ,
           according
           to
           that
           of
           Callimachus
           .
        
         
           
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
          
           
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
             .
          
           
             All
             hours
             they
             loyter
             safe
             ;
             and
             never
             fail
             ,
          
           
             Who
             Watchmen
             twelve
             pence
             give
             to
             buy
             sweet
             Ale.
             
          
        
         
           By
           the
           practice
           of
           which
           Instruction
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           we
           that
           were
           just
           going
           to
           the
           Pound
           ▪
           were
           at
           the
           intercession
           of
           those
           dulcified
           Sons
           of
           Horror
           (
           one
           of
           whom
           swore
           to
           the
           deep
           pit
           of
           Darkness
           that
           he
           knew
           Eucolpius
           ,
           and
           knew
           him
           to
           be
           a
           very
           Civil
           Gentleman
           ,
           when
           tho
           he
           had
           never
           seen
           him
           in
           his
           life
           )
           with
           an
           Extortion
           of
           much
           Acknowledgment
           for
           so
           great
           a
           favor
           ,
           let
           at
           liberty
           .
           This
           storm
           was
           no
           sooner
           
           over
           ,
           but
           the
           hazard
           was
           forgot
           ,
           and
           a
           new
           Ramble
           concluded
           on
           ;
           at
           length
           under
           the
           Conduct
           of
           Eucolpius
           we
           came
           both
           into
           a
           by-Street
           ,
           but
           there
           was
           such
           a
           general
           silence
           in
           the
           Habitations
           of
           the
           Syrens
           ,
           as
           if
           all
           the
           lower
           world
           had
           been
           listning
           after
           news
           in
           the
           upper
           .
           O
           quoth
           Eucolpius
           !
           the
           Inhabitants
           of
           these
           parts
           are
           as
           laborious
           Husbandmen
           as
           any
           be
           in
           Betty-land
           :
           They
           work
           day
           and
           night
           ,
           and
           therefore
           no
           wonder
           they
           sleep
           so
           fast
           now
           they
           are
           at
           it
           .
           At
           length
           coming
           to
           a
           certain
           Habitation
           ,
           where
           the
           staple
           of
           the
           door
           was
           not
           driven
           close
           to
           the
           wall
           ,
           Eumolpus
           made
           a
           shift
           to
           get
           in
           his
           hand
           and
           put
           back
           the
           Lock
           ,
           we
           were
           no
           sooner
           entred
           and
           began
           to
           extol
           the
           kindness
           of
           Fortune
           ,
           but
           the
           very
           same
           way-Wood
           of
           the
           night
           that
           had
           prosecuted
           us
           before
           ,
           follow'd
           us
           close
           at
           the
           heels
           ,
           and
           
           seeing
           us
           lawful
           prize
           ,
           began
           to
           give
           order
           for
           a
           second
           seizure
           :
           But
           Eucolpius
           knowing
           the
           danger
           of
           a
           second
           Attachment
           ,
           bidding
           Eumolpus
           follow
           his
           example
           with
           his
           Sword
           in
           his
           hand
           ,
           being
           well
           seconded
           by
           Eumolpus
           ,
           soon
           forced
           a
           way
           through
           the
           slender
           Opposition
           of
           those
           decrepit
           Mirmydons
           ,
           and
           being
           got
           without
           the
           reach
           of
           their
           rusty
           Weapons
           they
           never
           slackned
           their
           paces
           ,
           which
           was
           a
           good
           swift
           Career
           ,
           till
           they
           were
           got
           out
           of
           the
           Dominions
           of
           that
           nocturnal
           Bugbear
           .
           By
           and
           by
           making
           a
           halt
           to
           take
           both
           breath
           and
           advise
           together
           ,
           now
           ,
           said
           Eucolpius
           ,
           let
           us
           return
           to
           the
           sam●
           place
           from
           whence
           we
           last
           came
           :
           for
           this
           Lord
           of
           Mis-rule
           having
           now
           gone
           his
           Rounds
           ,
           ●nd
           made
           his
           visits
           of
           Enquiry
           ,
           will
           be
           sure
           to
           come
           no
           more
           there
           .
           For
           a
           right
           bred
           Syren
           has
           a
           way
           of
           Charming
           these
           Officers
           of
           Justice
           
           and
           keeping
           them
           from
           wandering
           at
           all
           hours
           ,
           and
           to
           say
           truth
           ,
           there
           are
           few
           of
           these
           nocturnal
           
           Cerberus's
           that
           will
           bark
           at
           a
           Syrens
           Habitation
           ,
           unless
           he
           be
           very
           hungry
           indeed
           ,
           and
           have
           not
           been
           fed
           for
           a
           great
           while
           .
           With
           this
           Resolution
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           we
           tackt
           about
           ,
           and
           ski●ting
           through
           a
           little
           spot
           of
           Betty-land
           called
           
             Lincolns
             -
             Inn-fields
          
           ,
           we
           observed
           almost
           at
           every
           Gate
           of
           those
           wealthy
           Husbandmens
           Habitations
           ,
           a
           poor
           labouring
           man
           ,
           and
           a
           servant
           Shepherdess
           talking
           together
           .
           They
           were
           generally
           very
           serious
           and
           private
           in
           their
           Discourse
           ,
           tho
           it
           were
           now
           near
           two
           of
           the
           Clock
           in
           the
           morning
           ,
           but
           by
           what
           we
           over-heard
           ,
           Betty-land
           -
           Love
           was
           the
           main
           thing
           they
           drove
           at
           ,
           for
           sometimes
           we
           could
           hear
           the
           Shepherdess
           cry
           Sunday
           in
           the
           afternoon
           ;
           by
           and
           by
           the
           poor
           labourer
           protested
           the
           reality
           of
           his
           Affection
           :
           
           another
           was
           telling
           a
           long
           story
           of
           the
           Transactions
           in
           that
           habitation
           ;
           another
           was
           complaining
           that
           her
           Farm
           had
           been
           Tilled
           and
           Manured
           ;
           that
           Harvest
           was
           at
           hand
           ,
           and
           therefore
           desired
           the
           poor
           labourer
           to
           take
           some
           care
           where
           to
           inn
           the
           Crop.
           And
           another
           was
           delivering
           to
           her
           friends
           Candles
           ,
           cold
           Meat
           ,
           and
           other
           bundles
           of
           stuff
           ,
           which
           she
           had
           purloyned
           and
           made
           up
           ,
           in
           as
           little
           room
           as
           might
           be
           ;
           bidding
           her
           friend
           be
           sure
           to
           return
           by
           such
           a
           night
           again
           :
           certainly
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           to
           Eucolpius
           ,
           these
           husbandmen
           live
           here
           in
           very
           great
           security
           ,
           that
           they
           let
           their
           Gates
           stand
           open
           in
           such
           a
           desert
           place
           as
           this
           :
           O
           reply'd
           Eucolpius
           !
           these
           Husbandmen
           tho
           they
           be
           rich
           ,
           yet
           they
           have
           so
           many
           thieves
           within
           doors
           ,
           that
           they
           never
           fear
           those
           without
           :
           for
           they
           within
           doors
           will
           preserve
           their
           Masters
           substance
           
           from
           those
           without
           ,
           that
           it
           may
           fall
           into
           their
           own
           hands
           .
           Having
           observ'd
           these
           passages
           we
           jog'd
           on
           ,
           meeting
           none
           upon
           the
           Road
           ,
           but
           now
           and
           then
           one
           ,
           now
           and
           then
           a
           couple
           of
           rude
           labouring
           fellows
           with
           stout
           Cudgels
           in
           their
           hands
           ,
           looking
           as
           if
           they
           would
           eat
           us
           .
           These
           were
           the
           very
           dregs
           of
           all
           
           Betty-land
           ●hat
           take
           the
           greatest
           pains
           ,
           and
           run
           through
           the
           greatest
           hazards
           in
           the
           world
           to
           maintain
           themselves
           in
           Idleness
           .
           Coming
           to
           the
           Syrens
           Habitation
           we
           unlockt
           the
           Gate
           as
           we
           had
           done
           before
           ,
           and
           then
           barring
           it
           again
           ,
           went
           directly
           into
           a
           Room
           where
           there
           was
           a
           small
           fire
           ,
           but
           no
           other
           light
           ,
           nor
           any
           sound
           of
           any
           thing
           living
           in
           all
           the
           Habitation
           :
           down
           sate
           Eucolpius
           ,
           down
           sate
           Eumolpus
           ,
           right
           against
           the
           door
           of
           the
           room
           expecting
           what
           would
           happen
           ,
           when
           on
           a
           sudden
           we
           heard
           3
           or
           4
           
           Syrens
           laughing
           and
           toying
           together
           to
           make
           toward
           the
           back-door
           of
           the
           Habitation
           .
           The
           foremost
           poping
           into
           the
           Room
           ,
           and
           seeing
           the
           glittering
           of
           
           Eumolpus's
           Coat
           (
           which
           was
           richly
           lac't
           )
           by
           the
           re●lection
           of
           the
           fire
           ,
           flew
           back
           again
           ready
           to
           break
           her
           Neck
           ,
           crying
           out
           ,
           the
           Devil
           ,
           the
           Devil
           ,
           but
           Eumolpus
           compassionately
           following
           her
           ,
           and
           gently
           bespeaking
           her
           soon
           rid
           her
           of
           fears
           ,
           leading
           her
           by
           the
           hand
           into
           the
           room
           ,
           whom
           the
           rest
           of
           the
           Syrens
           followed
           .
           We
           call'd
           for
           more
           fire
           and
           Lamps
           that
           we
           might
           see
           one
           another
           ,
           and
           after
           that
           for
           such
           Liquors
           as
           the
           Habitation
           would
           afford
           :
           As
           for
           the
           Syrens
           themselves
           ,
           they
           were
           not
           the
           most
           Amiable
           that
           ever
           were
           seen
           ,
           which
           made
           us
           mind
           our
           Liquor
           rather
           than
           any
           other
           of
           their
           Temptations
           .
           Their
           Voices
           were
           none
           of
           the
           sweetest
           ,
           yet
           for
           a
           forc't
           put
           
           they
           might
           have
           serv'd
           ,
           had
           we
           not
           been
           kept
           waking
           by
           another
           Accident
           .
           For
           in
           the
           height
           of
           our
           mirth
           in
           comes
           an
           ordinary
           Betty-land
           Farmer
           ,
           who
           by
           his
           Familiarity
           seem'd
           to
           claim
           a
           kind
           of
           propriety
           in
           the
           whole
           Habitation
           :
           we
           saw
           he
           would
           be
           one
           of
           the
           Company
           ,
           and
           therefore
           we
           invited
           him
           .
           He
           had
           taken
           a
           large
           doze
           of
           the
           Syrens
           Charms
           ,
           which
           made
           his
           Tongue
           as
           nimble
           as
           a
           new
           oyl'd
           Jack
           :
           Between
           Eucolpius
           and
           him
           past
           many
           Discourses
           ,
           among
           the
           rest
           ,
           there
           was
           one
           Question
           stated
           by
           the
           Farmer
           ,
           Whether
           if
           one
           Farmer
           should
           rob
           another
           ,
           it
           were
           better
           to
           bind
           him
           ,
           or
           kill
           him
           to
           prevent
           discovery
           ?
           Heaven
           protect
           us
           !
           cry'd
           Eumolpus
           to
           himself
           ,
           if
           this
           be
           the
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           surely
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           the
           people
           thereof
           are
           meer
           Salvages
           ,
           however
           the
           Argument
           went
           on
           .
           Eucolpius
           who
           when
           he
           began
           to
           
           be
           intoxicated
           with
           the
           Syrens
           Liquor
           was
           very
           devout
           ,
           being
           for
           Mercy
           ,
           the
           Farmer
           all
           for
           Murder
           ,
           this
           made
           Eumolpus
           stand
           upon
           his
           Guard
           and
           to
           have
           a
           vigilant
           Eye
           upon
           the
           Syrens
           ,
           and
           to
           hasten
           the
           complete
           Charming
           of
           the
           Farmer
           ,
           which
           was
           at
           length
           so
           effectually
           perform'd
           by
           Eucolpius
           and
           Eumolpus
           together
           ,
           that
           he
           fell
           into
           a
           profound
           sleep
           :
           in
           which
           condition
           after
           he
           had
           lain
           a
           while
           ,
           he
           was
           at
           length
           rouz'd
           by
           the
           Syrens
           and
           hurried
           to
           his
           Sty
           like
           a
           Swine
           :
           After
           his
           departure
           the
           Syrens
           vanished
           ,
           and
           Eumolpus
           and
           Eucolpius
           remain'd
           alone
           ,
           who
           early
           in
           the
           morning
           leaving
           the
           Gates
           of
           the
           Habitation
           open
           ,
           and
           the
           Syrens
           fast
           asleep
           ,
           went
           their
           ways
           to
           seek
           out
           more
           secure
           ●efreshments
           .
           Thus
           you
           see
           the
           meaner
           sort
           of
           the
           Inhabitants
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           are
           a
           very
           wicked
           sort
           of
           people
           ,
           
           being
           no
           great
           admirers
           of
           Law
           or
           Government
           :
           for
           all
           Pleasure
           is
           expensive
           ,
           and
           they
           wanting
           the
           support
           of
           Extravagance
           ,
           will
           oftentimes
           in
           their
           necessity
           take
           it
           by
           violence
           from
           one
           another
           ,
           sometimes
           in
           the
           street
           ,
           sometimes
           in
           the
           high-way
           ;
           nay
           ,
           sometimes
           they
           will
           enter
           one
           anothers
           Castles
           by
           main
           force
           ,
           and
           rifle
           ,
           and
           what
           they
           get
           they
           spend
           all
           upon
           their
           Syrens
           with
           whom
           they
           live
           in
           a
           kind
           of
           Community
           .
           I
           remember
           ,
           said
           Eucolpius
           ,
           a
           Husbandman
           in
           Betty-land
           that
           had
           his
           Castle
           entred
           ,
           and
           much
           of
           his
           substance
           taken
           away
           ;
           who
           thereupon
           resolving
           to
           go
           in
           pursuit
           of
           the
           Labourer
           that
           had
           so
           spoiled
           him
           ●f
           his
           goods
           ,
           sent
           for
           me
           to
           assist
           him
           :
           we
           for
           our
           better
           security
           took
           with
           us
           one
           of
           the
           great
           Rulers
           of
           the
           night
           ,
           and
           with
           him
           a
           certain
           day-Labourer
           ,
           who
           pretends
           to
           know
           
           all
           the
           habitations
           of
           the
           Syrens
           .
           The
           more
           to
           be
           wondred
           at
           ,
           as
           being
           in
           one
           of
           the
           greatest
           Cities
           in
           all
           Betty-land
           ,
           and
           thus
           accompanied
           we
           began
           our
           progress
           one
           night
           in
           the
           most
           dead
           time
           of
           all
           ;
           I
           dare
           say
           ,
           said
           Eucolpius
           ,
           we
           entred
           above
           a
           hundred
           several
           Habitations
           of
           a
           hundred
           several
           Syrens
           ,
           taking
           a
           view
           of
           every
           room
           in
           every
           one
           of
           them
           ,
           where
           it
           was
           not
           a
           little
           pleasant
           to
           see
           what
           feat
           kind
           of
           Enormities
           night
           conceals
           .
           We
           found
           the
           Husbandmen
           and
           the
           Syrens
           generally
           in
           bed
           and
           asleep
           together
           ,
           for
           the
           hardness
           of
           their
           Labour
           made
           them
           sleep
           without
           Opiates
           :
           In
           some
           Beds
           3
           Syrens
           and
           one
           Husbandman
           ,
           in
           another
           place
           3
           Husbandmen
           and
           one
           Syren
           ;
           at
           another
           Habitation
           one
           Husbandman
           and
           2
           Syrens
           ,
           in
           another
           2
           Husbandmen
           and
           one
           Syren
           ,
           in
           another
           two
           Husbandmen
           and
           
           two
           Syrens
           all
           together
           :
           in
           another
           3
           Syrens
           and
           two
           Husbandmen
           ,
           in
           another
           3
           Husbandmen
           and
           two
           Syrens
           .
           Eucolpius
           that
           had
           never
           seen
           so
           strange
           a
           mixture
           of
           Familiarity
           before
           ,
           began
           to
           doubt
           whether
           this
           were
           not
           some
           Art
           of
           
           Solon's
           Common-Wealth
           ,
           for
           ,
           said
           he
           ,
           there
           was
           as
           much
           Athenian
           Liberty
           as
           ever
           that
           great
           Law-giver
           could
           possibly
           allow
           .
           The
           day-Labourer
           who
           was
           with
           us
           ,
           whether
           he
           knew
           them
           all
           or
           no
           ,
           I
           cannot
           tell
           ,
           said
           Eucolpius
           ,
           but
           he
           pretended
           to
           do
           so
           ,
           and
           pulling
           aside
           the
           head-Geer
           of
           one
           ,
           and
           the
           hair
           of
           another
           :
           quoth
           he
           ,
           this
           is
           Dol
           such
           a
           one
           ,
           and
           this
           is
           Kate
           such
           a
           one
           ,
           and
           this
           is
           Nan
           such
           a
           one
           :
           as
           if
           he
           had
           been
           showing
           us
           the
           Tombs
           at
           Westminster
           with
           a
           white
           staff
           in
           his
           hand
           .
           And
           I
           believe
           had
           the
           night
           been
           a
           week
           lo●g
           ,
           we
           had
           had
           variety
           of
           these
           O●j●cts
           .
           Eucolpius
           when
           he
           came
           
           home
           told
           Eumolpus
           of
           his
           Adventure
           ,
           who
           lamented
           nothing
           more
           than
           his
           misfortune
           of
           missing
           
           Eucolpius's
           Company
           ;
           that
           night
           however
           it
           made
           him
           restless
           for
           new
           discoveries
           ,
           which
           they
           resolved
           to
           prosecute
           the
           night
           following
           .
           The
           Sun
           had
           now
           withdrawn
           himself
           and
           it
           was
           within
           an
           hour
           of
           night
           when
           Eucolpius
           and
           I
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           entring
           into
           one
           of
           the
           Gaming-Houses
           of
           the
           Syrens
           ,
           went
           up
           into
           a
           private
           Apartment
           ,
           calling
           to
           the
           chief
           Syren
           to
           bring
           us
           a
           Bowl
           of
           her
           most
           charming
           Liquor
           ;
           she
           that
           brought
           it
           was
           no
           sooner
           sate
           down
           by
           us
           ,
           but
           she
           began
           to
           talk
           of
           these
           Persons
           who
           were
           the
           Chiefest
           Husbandmen
           in
           Betty-land
           in
           their
           time
           ,
           at
           so
           familiar
           rate
           that
           we
           wondred
           how
           she
           came
           by
           so
           great
           an
           Acquaintance
           among
           the
           Nobler
           sort
           of
           Husbandmen
           ,
           being
           such
           an
           ordinary
           Syren
           her
           
           self
           :
           for
           she
           can
           divison
           upon
           their
           Descents
           and
           Pedigrees
           ,
           as
           if
           she
           had
           been
           bred
           in
           the
           College
           of
           Heralds
           .
           While
           we
           were
           thus
           taken
           up
           with
           Enchantments
           of
           her
           Discourse
           ,
           a
           strange
           lumbring
           noise
           invaded
           our
           Ears
           f●om
           the
           stairs
           which
           led
           into
           our
           Apartment
           :
           The
           Syren
           when
           she
           heard
           it
           ,
           flew
           out
           of
           the
           Room
           with
           the
           swiftness
           of
           a
           shooting-Star
           ,
           clapping
           the
           door
           fast
           after
           her
           :
           But
           we
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           big
           with
           Curiosity
           had
           a
           longing
           desire
           to
           know
           the
           reason
           of
           so
           much
           Clutter
           .
           By
           and
           by
           ,
           peeping
           through
           the
           door
           ,
           we
           perceived
           an
           old
           Farmer
           of
           Betty-land
           coming
           up
           upon
           four
           Legs
           two
           Natural
           and
           two
           Artificial
           (
           a
           pair
           of
           wooden
           Crutches
           )
           with
           which
           he
           did
           so
           knock
           and
           bepestle
           the
           Boards
           ,
           that
           a
           Horse
           with
           4
           Iron
           shooes
           would
           have
           been
           thought
           to
           have
           walkt
           upon
           Velvet
           after
           him
           ,
           so
           weak
           and
           
           so
           decrepit
           ,
           so
           old
           ,
           so
           worn
           out
           with
           the
           Labor
           of
           ●hat
           Country
           ,
           that
           no
           greater
           pain
           could
           be
           imagined
           ,
           than
           the
           pain
           which
           he
           seemed
           to
           endure
           in
           his
           Engine-like●
           motion
           :
           with
           much
           ado
           at
           length
           he
           got
           to
           the
           inside
           of
           a
           Table
           ,
           and
           sate
           him
           down
           with
           his
           back
           against
           the
           Wainscot
           ,
           opposite
           to
           the
           Chimny
           :
           Surely
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           were
           the
           seven
           Wise
           Men
           of
           Greece
           now
           alive
           ,
           it
           would
           puzzle
           their
           Understanding
           to
           know
           the
           strange
           and
           hidden
           de●ire
           of
           this
           old
           Farmer
           .
           I
           warrant
           ,
           quoth
           Eucolpius
           ,
           this
           old
           Farmer
           had
           been
           an
           industrious
           workman
           in
           his
           time
           ,
           and
           now
           to
           see
           a
           fertil
           spot
           of
           ground
           ,
           to
           behold
           a
           pleasing
           Prospect
           ,
           is
           as
           delightful
           to
           him
           as
           the
           Tillage
           it self
           was
           formerly
           .
           Age
           unfit
           for
           Action
           will
           delight
           it self
           in
           the
           Memory
           of
           what
           in
           Youth
           it
           has
           pe●form'd
           ,
           whether
           we
           were
           addicted
           to
           Acts
           
           of
           Honesty
           or
           of
           Villany
           ,
           Repetition
           sooths
           the
           Fancy
           ,
           and
           dandles
           it
           with
           the
           remembrance
           of
           what
           a
           drooping
           performer
           has
           done
           :
           so
           setling
           to
           our
           peeping
           Crannies
           ,
           we
           observed
           a
           young
           Syren
           come
           into
           the
           Room
           with
           two
           sable
           Pots
           of
           Enchanting
           Liquor
           in
           her
           hands
           ,
           which
           she
           set
           down
           before
           him
           .
           The
           old
           Farmer
           drank
           not
           so
           lamely
           as
           he
           went
           ,
           but
           freely
           ;
           and
           made
           the
           Syren
           quaff
           her
           own
           Liquor
           as
           freely
           as
           himself
           :
           she
           had
           a
           Brow
           as
           black
           as
           a
           new
           Beaver
           ,
           and
           her
           Cheeks
           were
           as
           ruddy
           as
           the
           Vermilion●
           Edges
           of
           a
           new
           Book
           .
           In
           a
           short
           while
           betaking
           her self
           to
           the
           Chimny
           ,
           she
           stood
           bolt
           upright
           ,
           and
           having
           the
           Signal
           given
           ,
           (
           as
           they
           draw
           the
           Curtain
           up
           from
           before
           the
           Scenes
           of
           a
           Theater
           )
           she
           drew
           the
           Curtain
           gently
           up
           that
           was
           before
           it
           ,
           and
           showed
           the
           Prospect
           of
           a
           very
           fair
           
           Garden-plot
           of
           Maiden-hair
           ,
           not
           green
           as
           in
           other
           Countries
           ,
           but
           growing
           like
           a
           kind
           of
           black
           Fern
           ,
           or
           rather
           a
           spot
           of
           Ground
           looking
           like
           a
           sieve
           of
           black
           Cherries
           ,
           ●overed
           over
           with
           the
           tops
           of
           russet
           Fennel
           .
           The
           Fields
           about
           were
           imbroidered
           over
           with
           white
           Dasies
           and
           yellow
           Pissabeds
           :
           but
           the
           old
           Farmer
           who
           neither
           cared
           for
           Innocency
           ,
           and
           had
           been
           sufficiently
           plagued
           with
           Jealousie
           ,
           and
           consequently
           could
           endure
           neither
           of
           those
           Colours
           ,
           caused
           her
           to
           d●ub
           her
           hands
           with
           the
           Soot
           of
           the
           Chimny
           ,
           to
           dissigure
           the
           whole
           prospect
           of
           those
           more
           pleasant
           Colours
           ,
           not
           permitting
           her
           to
           leave
           any
           thing
           but
           what
           was
           black
           within
           the
           Horizon
           of
           his
           View
           .
           Then
           he
           pleased
           his
           aged
           Eyes
           with
           beholding
           the
           whole
           ,
           commending
           what
           he
           thought
           fit
           to
           be
           commended
           ,
           and
           reading
           a
           Lecture
           of
           Betty-land
           Husbandry
           ,
           over
           every
           
           part
           ,
           till
           satiated
           with
           the
           Prospect
           and
           his
           Discourse
           ,
           the
           Curtain
           again
           was
           let
           down
           ,
           and
           the
           Syren
           sent
           away
           for
           more
           Enchanting
           Liquor
           to
           requite
           her
           kindness
           ▪
           certainly
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           the
           Fancy
           of
           this
           Farmer
           was
           the
           most
           Ext●avagant
           that
           was
           ever
           known
           .
           There
           is
           some
           Reason
           for
           it
           ,
           said
           Eucolpius
           ,
           for
           Betty-land
           Love
           as
           it
           ent●ed
           first
           into
           the
           Eye
           ,
           so
           at
           last
           goes
           out
           of
           the
           Eye
           .
           The
           Eye
           is
           the
           Charriot
           wherein
           the
           Fancy
           Rides
           ,
           surveying
           past
           contents
           ,
           and
           if
           that
           be
           strong
           and
           juvenile
           ,
           it
           will
           imploy
           the
           Body
           in
           something
           of
           its
           former
           concerns
           ,
           how
           impotent
           ,
           how
           unwieldly
           soever
           :
           for
           Reason
           ,
           you
           must
           know
           ,
           is
           not
           at
           all
           permitted
           to
           be
           so
           much
           as
           named
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           where
           it
           is
           Death
           to
           make
           use
           of
           it
           :
           And
           where
           the
           Husbandmen
           and
           Huswifes
           are
           guided
           only
           by
           
           Passion
           ,
           and
           follow
           only
           the
           perswasions
           of
           Appetite
           .
        
         
           Again
           ,
           as
           there
           is
           no
           Reason
           ,
           so
           there
           is
           no
           Wisdom
           in
           Betty-land
           :
           they
           seldom
           hear
           of
           it
           from
           one
           end
           of
           the
           Country
           to
           the
           other●
           or
           if
           they
           chance
           to
           hear
           the
           least
           sound
           of
           it
           ,
           they
           count
           it
           as
           fatal
           as
           the
           Romans
           did
           to
           hear
           ▪
           the
           Ravens
           croak
           upon
           the
           left
           hand
           :
           like
           the
           young
           People
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           that
           when
           the
           Bells
           ring
           to
           the
           Temple
           ,
           run
           to
           the
           Syrens
           Habitations
           at
           Islington
           ,
           believing
           that
           the
           Bells
           are
           hung
           in
           the
           City
           to
           ring
           them
           into
           the
           Country
           .
           Should
           this
           Farmer
           have
           been
           so
           impotent
           again
           ,
           he
           would
           not
           have
           been
           a
           Rush
           the
           wiser
           ,
           and
           therefore
           't
           is
           no
           wonder
           his
           predominating
           Superiors
           direct
           and
           govern
           him
           as
           they
           please
           themselves
           .
           Eucolpius
           having
           thus
           said
           ,
           Eumolpus
           and
           he
           took
           their
           way
           towards
           a
           small
           part
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           
           near
           the
           Temple
           of
           St.
           Buttolphs-Aldgate
           ,
           where
           upon
           the
           first
           call
           ,
           he
           was
           let
           into
           a
           f●ir
           Habitation
           belonging
           to
           one
           of
           those
           Elderly
           Syrens
           called
           Maquerelas
           .
           The
           Apartments
           were
           fair
           and
           well
           adorn'd
           ,
           through
           one
           of
           which
           ,
           as
           we
           passed
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           we
           saw
           a
           Table
           spread
           and
           furnished
           as
           if
           it
           had
           been
           for
           the
           Supper
           of
           Trimalcio
           in
           Petronius
           :
           being
           come
           into
           our
           own
           Retirement
           ,
           we
           askt
           the
           Syren
           ,
           what
           Vlysses
           was
           to
           be
           Entertain'd
           there
           that
           night
           ?
           she
           answered
           with
           a
           Smile
           ,
           but
           told
           Eucolpius
           more
           familiarly
           ,
           that
           we
           should
           have
           a
           sight
           of
           the
           pastime
           in
           due
           season
           ,
           ●eeing
           there
           was
           none
           but
           himself
           and
           one
           whom
           she
           saw
           to
           be
           his
           peculiar
           Friend
           ;
           tho
           with
           a
           most
           ●olemn
           Proviso
           of
           Secrecy
           enjoyn'd
           .
           In
           the
           mean
           time
           ,
           we
           call'd
           for
           a
           Syren
           or
           two
           ,
           which
           were
           immediately
           call'd
           up
           ,
           Charming
           enough
           ;
           we
           had
           no
           
           sooner
           drank
           a
           Cup
           or
           two
           of
           the
           Syrens
           Liquo●s
           ,
           but
           one
           of
           them
           began
           to
           fall
           into
           the
           rehearsal
           of
           her
           Misfortunes
           ,
           that
           she
           was
           the
           Daughter
           of
           one
           of
           the
           Priests
           of
           Pan
           (
           for
           the
           most
           common
           Huswives
           of
           
           Betty-land
           ●eign
           themselves
           to
           be
           either
           the
           Daughters
           ,
           Sisters
           ,
           or
           Huswifes
           of
           the
           Priests
           of
           Pan
           ,
           thereby
           to
           gain
           the
           greater
           pity
           of
           their
           Sufferings
           :
           )
           that
           she
           had
           been
           driven
           out
           of
           doors
           by
           the
           Shepherd
           ,
           whom
           of
           all
           others
           in
           the
           Country
           she
           lov'd
           most
           intirely
           .
           The
           other
           cursed
           a
           noble
           Husbandman
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           for
           being
           untrue
           to
           her
           ;
           or
           else
           —
           for
           a
           deep
           Sigh
           sti●led
           the
           rest
           ,
           but
           both
           of
           them
           concluded
           in
           ,
           What
           would
           you
           give
           them
           ?
           That
           they
           were
           no
           common
           Syrens
           ,
           but
           seeing
           us
           Civil
           Shepherds
           ,
           if
           we
           pleased
           to
           come
           to
           their
           Habitations
           ,
           we
           should
           not
           find
           them
           to
           be
           Mercenary
           .
           But
           offe●
           
           offer
           to
           lay
           your
           Lips
           to
           theirs
           ,
           they
           were
           presently
           according
           to
           the
           Fashion
           of
           the
           Country
           ,
           begging
           either
           for
           Scarfs
           ,
           or
           Gloves
           ,
           though
           at
           the
           same
           time
           they
           bragged
           of
           Wardrobes
           richer
           than
           those
           of
           Lucullus
           :
           We
           that
           believ'd
           not
           a
           word
           they
           said
           ,
           easily
           condol'd
           with
           them
           ,
           and
           promised
           Mountains
           ;
           for
           there
           is
           nothing
           more
           practicable
           in
           Betty-land
           than
           lying
           and
           dissembling
           ,
           Two
           gifts
           that
           a
           Husbandman
           of
           that
           Country
           can
           no
           more
           be
           without
           ,
           than
           without
           his
           Plow
           .
           In
           fine
           ,
           these
           two
           Syrens
           were
           ●orced
           to
           leave
           us
           ,
           being
           called
           away
           by
           the
           Syren
           Government
           ,
           for
           it
           appear'd
           that
           the
           Shepherd
           was
           entred
           ,
           at
           whose
           Devotion
           the
           Habitation
           and
           all
           within
           it
           were
           ,
           being
           at
           all
           the
           Expence
           for
           his
           peculiar
           Fancy
           ;
           by
           and
           by
           ,
           the
           Alarm
           of
           an
           uncouth
           noise
           ,
           called
           us
           to
           our
           peeping-holes
           of
           Observation
           ;
           from
           
           whence
           we
           discovered
           in
           the
           great
           corner
           Room
           ,
           where
           we
           saw
           the
           Table
           spread
           as
           we
           first
           came
           along
           ,
           a
           very
           fair
           Collation
           of
           Costly
           Viands
           ,
           the
           most
           part
           Fowl.
           About
           the
           Table
           sate
           some
           half
           a
           dozen
           Brisk
           Syrens
           ,
           sitting
           almost
           as
           they
           were
           pictured
           (
           saving
           that
           they
           had
           other
           Instruments
           to
           use
           than
           Combs
           and
           Looking-Glasses
           )
           for
           their
           lower
           parts
           were
           hid
           by
           the
           Table
           ,
           as
           they
           had
           been
           under
           water
           ;
           but
           from
           the
           Wast
           upward
           ,
           they
           were
           to
           be
           seen
           quite
           naked
           ,
           as
           in
           vulgar
           Signs
           .
           All
           this
           while
           we
           missed
           the
           Shepherd
           ,
           and
           wondred
           he
           should
           neglect
           the
           sight
           of
           such
           fair
           Prospects
           as
           these
           were
           ,
           but
           by
           and
           by
           we
           discovered
           him
           by
           the
           noise
           he
           made
           under
           the
           Table
           upon
           all
           four
           ,
           picking
           up
           the
           Bones
           which
           the
           Syrens
           threw
           down
           ,
           yelping
           and
           snarling
           like
           an
           Izeland
           Cur
           ,
           and
           biting
           at
           the
           Legs
           and
           Shins
           of
           that
           Syren
           which
           
           threw
           him
           down
           his
           desired
           Food
           .
           This
           violent
           humor
           continued
           all
           along
           the
           time
           of
           Supper
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           to
           his
           Astonishment
           ,
           which
           made
           him
           think
           the
           Mysteries
           of
           Isis
           to
           be
           a
           Bauble
           ,
           and
           the
           carrying
           
             Betty-land
             Ploughs
          
           in
           publick
           Procession
           upon
           sticks
           by
           the
           Female
           Bacchides
           ,
           to
           be
           a
           
           May-Game
           :
           and
           yet
           they
           appear'd
           to
           be
           altogether
           ,
           but
           a
           kind
           of
           family
           Betty-land
           -
           Love
           ,
           (
           and
           there
           are
           few
           Families
           without
           a
           Cur
           )
           for
           there
           was
           no
           more
           harm
           done
           ,
           but
           after
           Supper
           every
           Syren
           seem'd
           to
           vanish
           as
           they
           pleased
           themselves
           :
           Look
           ye
           ,
           said
           Eucolpius
           ,
           now
           you
           have
           beheld
           something
           more
           strange
           than
           what
           you
           saw
           before
           .
           Certainly
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           the
           Gods
           that
           only
           smil'd
           to
           see
           Mars
           and
           Venus
           so
           entangled
           as
           they
           did
           ,
           would
           have
           laugh'd
           themselves
           out
           of
           their
           Immortality
           ,
           to
           have
           seen
           this
           Extravagant
           Divertisement
           .
           
           Think
           you
           ,
           said
           Eucolpius
           ,
           this
           Shepherd
           can
           give
           any
           Reason
           for
           this
           ?
           Surely
           no
           other
           ,
           reply'd
           Eumolpus
           ,
           than
           that
           of
           the
           Poet
           :
           
             
               
                 Quid
                 non
                 constricta
                 spectatis
                 fronte
                 Cutanes
                 ,
              
               
                 Damnatisque
                 novae
                 simplicitatis
                 opus
                 ?
              
               
                 Ipse
                 pater
                 veri
                 doctus
                 Epicurus
                 in
                 Arte
              
               
                 Iussit
                 ,
                 &
                 hanc
                 vitam
                 dixit
                 habere
                 tales
                 .
              
            
             
               
                 What
                 ail
                 ye
                 ,
                 froward
                 Cinicks
                 ,
                 thus
                 to
                 stare
                 ,
              
               
                 Condemning
                 what
                 I
                 act
                 ,
                 because
                 't
                 is
                 rare
                 :
              
               
                 Wise
                 Epicure
                 thus
                 taught
                 ,
                 lose
                 no
                 Delight
                 ,
              
               
                 For
                 time
                 has
                 heels
                 and
                 nimbly
                 takes
                 his
                 Flight
                 :
              
               
                 Dear
                 Life
                 whose
                 shooes
                 are
                 made
                 of
                 running
                 Leather
                 ,
              
               
               
                 Shall
                 I
                 not
                 use
                 thee
                 ?
                 wherefore
                 came
                 I
                 hither
                 ?
              
            
          
        
         
           From
           thence
           at
           a
           later
           hour
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           we
           passed
           to
           see
           the
           Publick
           Academies
           and
           Shools
           of
           the
           Country
           ,
           where
           we
           found
           them
           altogether
           for
           Justing
           ,
           and
           Turnaments
           ,
           and
           Running
           of
           the
           Ring
           :
           but
           in
           this
           particular
           ,
           as
           captious
           one
           among
           another
           ,
           as
           Church-Wardens-Wives
           ;
           for
           it
           not
           being
           the
           Custom
           of
           the
           Country
           ,
           for
           Shepherds
           to
           Just
           one
           with
           another
           ,
           but
           only
           Shepherds
           with
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           and
           Shepherdesses
           with
           Shepherds
           :
           the
           Shepherds
           will
           never
           Just
           unless
           the
           Shepherdesses
           will
           provide
           Rings
           ,
           nor
           the
           Shepherdesses
           can
           ever
           be
           brought
           to
           run
           a-Tilt
           ,
           unless
           the
           Shepherds
           provide
           Launces
           .
           However
           if
           the
           Parties
           stand
           upon
           it
           ,
           there
           seldom
           happens
           any
           great
           Quarrel
           about
           that
           Punctilio
           .
           
           These
           Academies
           stand
           open
           all
           night
           long
           ,
           and
           there
           are
           some
           so
           accustomed
           to
           these
           Exercises
           ,
           that
           they
           will
           hit
           the
           Ma●k
           as
           well
           by
           night
           as
           by
           day
           .
           They
           had
           in
           these
           Academies
           other
           so●ts
           of
           Games
           ,
           at
           which
           they
           play'd
           long
           ,
           as
           In
           and
           In
           ,
           amd
           
             All
             Fours
          
           ,
           but
           one
           thing
           we
           never
           perceiv'd
           before
           ,
           that
           when
           they
           went
           to
           play
           at
           Ruff
           ,
           they
           put
           out
           all
           the
           Honors
           .
        
         
           The
           Noble
           sort
           of
           Syrens
           are
           of
           a
           Disposition
           very
           various
           f●om
           these
           ,
           for
           they
           being
           better
           stockt
           with
           Wealth
           ,
           carry
           on
           higher
           Designs
           ,
           which
           they
           will
           bring
           about
           what
           ever
           it
           cost
           them
           ,
           or
           perish
           in
           the
           Enterprise
           :
           They
           are
           very
           subtle
           ,
           and
           not
           only
           make
           use
           of
           all
           sorts
           of
           Deceits
           and
           Stratagems
           already
           discovered
           ,
           but
           add
           daily
           of
           their
           own
           .
           They
           are
           very
           much
           addicted
           to
           Enchantments
           ,
           and
           very
           skilful
           in
           making
           Amorous
           Medicaments
           .
           They
           that
           would
           
           understand
           the
           Nature
           of
           these
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           may
           read
           the
           Stories
           of
           Messaline
           ,
           whom
           there
           was
           none
           that
           exceeded
           in
           all
           the
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           ;
           of
           Lunia
           and
           Lucilla
           ,
           who
           both
           Enchanted
           their
           own
           Shepherds
           to
           death
           ▪
           for
           the
           desire
           of
           others
           whom
           they
           lov'd
           better
           :
           Semiramis
           out
           of
           a
           desire
           of
           Empire
           ,
           and
           for
           the
           Love
           of
           her
           own
           Son
           ,
           caus'd
           her
           Husbandman
           to
           be
           slain
           :
           How
           dear
           the
           mistake
           of
           Guc●ovir
           (
           when
           her
           Husband
           tickled
           her
           in
           the
           Neck
           with
           his
           Riding-Rod
           )
           cost
           the
           poor
           King
           for
           his
           accidental
           Discovery
           ,
           is
           not
           unknown
           to
           them
           that
           have
           been
           conversant
           in
           the
           Saxon
           parts
           of
           Betty-land
           .
           The
           Cruelty
           of
           Ione
           of
           Naples
           ,
           the
           cunning
           Stratagems
           of
           
             Don
             Olympia
          
           ,
           and
           the
           Intreagues
           of
           
             Don
             Christiana
          
           ,
           are
           still
           fresh
           in
           Memory
           .
           Nor
           had
           the
           
             Druyd
             Reynall
          
           found
           such
           copious
           matter
           to
           compile
           
           his
           Book
           of
           
             Celestial
             Revenge
          
           ,
           had
           it
           not
           been
           for
           the
           Effects
           of
           
           Betty-land-Love
           .
           The
           Nature
           of
           which
           is
           so
           strange
           ,
           that
           it
           shall
           in
           the
           view
           of
           the
           same
           Horizon
           on
           this
           side
           the
           Hedge
           shower
           down
           nothing
           but
           Malice
           ,
           Hatred
           ,
           and
           dismal
           Contrivances
           :
           while
           on
           the
           other
           side
           the
           Hedge
           ,
           at
           the
           same
           time
           you
           shall
           perceive
           nothing
           but
           the
           Sun-shine
           of
           Sweetness
           and
           Caresses
           .
        
         
           The
           Country
           of
           Betty-land
           has
           had
           formerly
           good
           Benefactors
           ,
           who
           did
           very
           much
           add
           to
           the
           Glory
           and
           Increase
           of
           its
           Fame
           .
           The
           first
           of
           those
           was
           Solon
           ,
           the
           great
           
             Athenian
             Law-giver
          
           ,
           and
           by
           the
           Oracle
           of
           Apollo
           accompted
           one
           of
           the
           Seven
           Wise-men
           of
           Greece
           ,
           who
           was
           the
           first
           that
           made
           it
           his
           publick
           Care
           to
           provide
           Syrens
           for
           the
           Shepherds
           of
           that
           Country
           .
           The
           first
           that
           dedicated
           a
           Temple
           to
           Venus
           ,
           the
           Universal
           
           Goddess
           of
           Betty-land
           out
           of
           the
           Games
           of
           prostituted
           Syrens
           ,
           and
           so
           great
           an
           Esteem
           the
           Grecian
           part
           of
           Betty-land
           had
           for
           those
           Syrens
           ,
           that
           when
           Xerxes
           invaded
           Greece
           ,
           the
           Corinthian
           being
           the
           most
           polite
           of
           all
           the
           Country
           ,
           were
           ordered
           to
           make
           publick
           Supplication
           for
           the
           safety
           of
           Greece
           ;
           so
           honor'd
           and
           so
           Rich
           grew
           the
           Syrens
           among
           the
           Ephesians
           ,
           that
           they
           built
           several
           Temples
           in
           that
           City
           .
           The
           Corinthians
           also
           gave
           them
           that
           Respect
           ,
           that
           when
           t●ey
           were
           to
           supplicate
           Venus
           in
           any
           m●tter
           of
           Importance
           ,
           the
           peculiar
           charge
           of
           their
           Prayers
           was
           committed
           to
           their
           Syrens
           .
           Aristotle
           also
           thought
           them
           worthy
           of
           Divine
           Honors
           ,
           when
           he
           made
           the
           same
           Offering
           ,
           and
           us'd
           the
           same
           Ceremonies
           to
           the
           Cyren
           Hernia
           ,
           as
           were
           usually
           observ'd
           to
           Ceres
           of
           
             Eleasine
             .
             Venus
          
           
           being
           the
           first
           Syren
           ,
           was
           therefore
           counted
           a
           Goddess
           ,
           from
           whose
           Example
           it
           grew
           in
           Custom
           among
           the
           Cyprians
           ,
           that
           the
           young
           Shepherdesses
           did
           always
           (
           before
           they
           stuck
           close
           to
           any
           Shepherd
           )
           prostitute
           themselves
           on
           the
           Se●-shore
           ,
           thereby
           to
           pick
           up
           a
           Dowry
           acceptable
           to
           their
           peculiar
           Sh●pherds
           .
           And
           the
           Babyloni●ns
           by
           the
           Report
           of
           Herodo●us
           when
           they
           had
           consumed
           their
           Farms
           ,
           were
           wont
           to
           compel
           their
           Daughters
           to
           turn
           Syrens
           for
           the
           future
           Maintenance
           of
           them
           and
           themselves
           .
           Aspacia
           was
           a
           great
           Benefactor
           to
           Betty-land
           ,
           for
           she
           filled
           all
           Greece
           with
           Syrens
           ,
           and
           for
           the
           Love
           of
           her
           ,
           and
           for
           the
           Injury
           which
           the
           Megareans
           did
           〈◊〉
           in
           taking
           some
           of
           her
           young
           Syrens
           from
           her
           ,
           Pericles
           began
           that
           fatal
           and
           lasting
           Peloponnesian
           War.
           Heliogabulus
           was
           a
           very
           great
           Benefactor
           ,
           for
           he
           had
           all
           
           Conveniences
           belonging
           to
           
           Betty-land-Love
           in
           his
           own
           House
           :
           He
           gave
           to
           all
           the
           Roman
           Matrons
           that
           would
           turn
           Syrens
           ,
           not
           only
           Immunity
           ,
           but
           Impunity
           .
           Caesar
           was
           so
           great
           a
           Benefactor
           ,
           that
           he
           was
           called
           the
           Male
           for
           all
           Females
           :
           Rhodope
           also
           the
           great
           Friend
           and
           Companion
           of
           Aesop
           ,
           that
           made
           the
           Fables
           ,
           got
           so
           much
           Wealth
           by
           the
           occupation
           of
           a
           Syren
           ,
           that
           she
           built
           a
           Pyramid
           accounted
           the
           third
           wonder
           of
           the
           World
           :
           And
           Flora
           left
           the
           Empire
           of
           Rome
           her
           Heir
           .
           Of
           later
           times
           Pope
           Sixtus
           was
           a
           very
           great
           Benefactor
           to
           Betty-land
           ,
           who
           built
           a
           most
           Noble
           Habitation
           for
           Syrens
           at
           Rome
           ;
           nor
           are
           his
           Successors
           less
           kind
           ,
           by
           whom
           they
           are
           still
           indulged
           ,
           only
           paying
           a
           Iulio
           a
           week
           to
           the
           Church
           ,
           and
           it
           is
           a
           good
           Subsistence
           to
           the
           Priests
           of
           Pan
           in
           that
           Country
           ,
           to
           have
           an
           Allotment
           out
           of
           the
           Bordelli
           ,
           to
           make
           up
           
           the
           defects
           of
           other
           Endowments
           .
           As
           for
           Example
           ,
           A
           Curate-ship
           worth
           twenty
           Crowns
           .
           A
           Priory
           worth
           40
           Ducats
           ,
           and
           3
           Syrens
           in
           the
           Bordelli
           at
           20
           
           Iulio's
           a
           week
           .
           Nor
           are
           the
           Venetians
           less
           munificent
           Benefactors
           ,
           from
           whom
           they
           have
           all
           Immunity
           desirable
           ,
           nor
           are
           the
           Syrens
           less
           grateful
           in
           returning
           considerable
           Incomes
           to
           the
           Commonwealth
           ,
           for
           they
           being
           the
           Bulworks
           of
           Christendom
           are
           allowed
           all
           ways
           imaginable
           to
           support
           their
           urgent
           and
           unavoidable
           Necessities
           .
           Plato
           was
           also
           a
           great
           Benefactor
           to
           Betty-land
           ,
           for
           his
           Laws
           were
           for
           a
           Community
           of
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           among
           whose
           followers
           we
           may
           reckon
           the
           Nicolaitan
           Hereticks
           ,
           who
           to
           avoid
           the
           St●ipes
           of
           that
           Fury
           ,
           Jealousie
           ,
           thought
           it
           more
           Convenient
           that
           the
           Huswifes
           of
           their
           Country
           should
           be
           prostituted
           .
           Thus
           we
           see
           how
           
           Betty-land-Love
           has
           bewitched
           
           and
           charm'd
           the
           wisest
           Husbandman
           in
           all
           Ages
           .
           There
           is
           a
           strange
           Venom
           in
           it
           ,
           and
           it
           follows
           Success
           and
           Plenty
           with
           a
           strange
           Rage
           ,
           of
           both
           which
           ,
           he
           that
           is
           the
           absolute
           Master
           shall
           have
           much
           ado
           to
           keep
           out
           of
           the
           Tanpits
           of
           
           Betty-land-Love
           ,
           a
           very
           great
           Mischief
           ,
           no
           question
           ,
           in
           regard
           tha●
           the
           Chiefest
           Venuses
           will
           not
           permit
           their
           dearest
           
           Aeneas's
           to
           fall
           into
           ,
           if
           by
           all
           the
           Guards
           of
           Neptune
           &
           his
           blew
           Ey'd
           Host
           they
           can
           protect
           them
           both
           .
           The
           Vermine
           which
           most
           annoy
           the
           Agriculture
           most
           us'd
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           are
           your
           Sr.
           Rogers
           ,
           or
           Hypocritical
           Devotists
           ,
           and
           those
           other
           p●stilent
           Animals
           called
           
             Nurses
             ,
             Mother
             Midnights
          
           ,
           and
           Empericks
           ,
           with
           Skins
           as
           smooth
           as
           Beaver
           ,
           but
           black
           ,
           as
           that
           Markham
           of
           Betty-land
           (
           call'd
           
             Cornelius
             Agrippa
          
           )
           notably
           observes
           ,
           there
           are
           few
           Traps
           or
           Gins
           that
           can
           ensnare
           
           them
           ,
           your
           Sr.
           Rogers
           are
           so
           like
           Civet-Cats
           ,
           that
           the
           Husbandmen
           of
           Betty-land
           cannot
           distinguish
           one
           from
           another
           ,
           so
           that
           the
           Husbandmen
           let
           them
           come
           upon
           their
           Land
           ,
           thinking
           to
           retrieve
           the
           benefit
           of
           their
           Odoriferous
           and
           Precious
           Excrements
           ,
           but
           these
           Sr.
           Rogers
           being
           the
           more
           subtle
           Animals
           ,
           and
           great
           lovers
           of
           sweet
           Herbs
           ,
           do
           more
           often
           come
           upon
           their
           Land
           and
           defile
           it
           :
           To
           say
           truth
           ,
           where
           these
           Sr.
           Rogers
           have
           a
           design
           of
           Mischief
           ,
           there
           are
           no
           Pales
           ,
           no
           Fences
           ,
           no
           Hedges
           ,
           no
           Ditches
           that
           can
           keep
           them
           out
           ,
           no
           Locks
           ,
           no
           Bolts
           are
           strong
           enough
           to
           barricado
           a
           door
           against
           them
           .
           Nay
           the
           very
           Casements
           of
           the
           Shepherdesses
           hearts
           will
           fly
           open
           ,
           if
           they
           do
           but
           give
           the
           least
           wink
           ,
           they
           Charm
           the
           very
           Souls
           of
           the
           Betty-land
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           pretending
           to
           have
           
           Radamanthus's
           Whip
           in
           their
           pockets
           ,
           
           for
           the
           disobedient
           ,
           and
           such
           a
           mess
           of
           Celestial
           Suckets
           in
           a
           Lawn
           Handcherchief
           for
           them
           that
           consent
           ;
           so
           that
           the
           poor
           Creatures
           are
           forc't
           to
           yield
           themselves
           up
           wholly
           to
           their
           disposul
           ,
           besides
           the
           Reverence
           of
           their
           Exnmples
           ,
           a
           violent
           Argument
           to
           batter
           the
           weak
           Fort
           of
           Female
           Reason
           ,
           for
           most
           Females
           believe
           that
           the
           Priests
           of
           Pan
           are
           so
           Holy
           ,
           that
           they
           cannot
           err
           :
           And
           therefore
           in
           the
           Papistical
           .
           Parts
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           how
           many
           windfalls
           has
           the
           Hurricane
           of
           Confession
           blown
           down
           ?
           you
           may
           sometimes
           s●e
           the
           whole
           Country
           almost
           strew'd
           over
           with
           them
           ,
           such
           is
           the
           heat
           of
           a
           well
           grounded
           Opinion
           ,
           that
           it
           melts
           a
           Betty-land
           Female
           like
           Wax
           ,
           and
           then
           comes
           the
           Sr.
           Roger
           ,
           and
           claps
           his
           Impr●ssion
           upon
           her
           ,
           what
           Shephe●d
           can
           deny
           his
           Shepherdess
           when
           he
           asks
           her
           ,
           and
           she
           replies
           ,
           she
           is
           
           going
           to
           a
           Lecture
           ?
           What
           Shepherd
           can
           deny
           40
           or
           50
           l.
           at
           a
           time
           ,
           when
           she
           cries
           't
           is
           to
           pay
           her
           Sr.
           Roger
           ?
           This
           brings
           your
           Sr.
           Rogers
           to
           their
           white
           Caps
           and
           their
           Neck-Handkerchiefs
           ,
           but
           who
           can
           avoid
           it
           ?
           for
           there
           is
           no
           prevailing
           against
           the
           force
           of
           Betty-land
           -
           Love
           ,
           your
           Mother-Midnights
           are
           like
           those
           little
           Vermine
           called
           Millepedes
           ,
           or
           Hog-lice
           ,
           for
           they
           will
           crawl
           from
           one
           place
           to
           another
           ,
           so
           unweariedly
           and
           so
           swiftly
           upon
           all
           Occasions
           ,
           that
           you
           would
           swear
           they
           had
           a
           thousand
           Legs
           apiece
           .
           They
           have
           such
           an
           Awe
           on
           the
           Spirits
           of
           the
           poor
           Shepherdesses
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           that
           whatever
           they
           say
           ,
           the
           others
           believe
           with
           more
           Reverence
           than
           the
           Legend
           of
           the
           Sybils
           .
           There
           is
           such
           a
           familiar
           and
           inward
           Commerce
           of
           Secrecy
           between
           these
           Mother-Midnights
           and
           Betty-land
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           that
           the
           
           latter
           are
           easily
           drawn
           to
           give
           their
           Appetite
           a
           Diversion
           where
           they
           can
           trust
           with
           so
           much
           Confidence
           ,
           not
           to
           yield
           were
           to
           mistrust
           ,
           and
           to
           mistrust
           were
           to
           break
           off
           the
           Communion
           of
           Secrecy
           .
           And
           they
           Conjecture
           not
           amiss
           ,
           that
           believe
           that
           many
           a
           Mother-Midnight
           is
           the
           more
           cheerfully
           obey'd
           by
           the
           Shepherdesses
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           for
           the
           supply
           of
           secret
           Communication
           ,
           there
           being
           as
           much
           pleasure
           to
           sit
           privately
           over
           a
           Makeroon
           and
           a
           Taster
           of
           Sack
           ,
           repeating
           past
           delights
           with
           the
           Accidents
           and
           Appurtenances
           ,
           as
           in
           the
           Enjoyment
           it self
           ;
           for
           what
           can
           be
           nearer
           to
           Enjoyment
           ,
           than
           to
           tell
           the
           very
           Actions
           ,
           Passions
           ,
           and
           Expressions
           of
           the
           Shepherd
           in
           the
           very
           Extacy
           of
           Fruition
           so
           frequently
           dore
           ,
           that
           unless
           it
           be
           done
           ,
           there
           is
           not
           that
           Love
           and
           Kindness
           thought
           to
           be
           between
           each
           
           other
           ?
           These
           Arcanums
           and
           Mysteries
           of
           Discourse
           ,
           being
           the
           Seals
           and
           Testimonies
           of
           their
           Friendship
           .
        
         
           Your
           Empericks
           ,
           tho
           they
           have
           smooth
           Skins
           like
           Beavers
           ,
           yet
           they
           have
           cursed
           sharp
           Claws
           ,
           if
           they
           cannot
           get
           over
           ,
           they
           will
           dig
           under
           the
           Pales
           :
           and
           when
           once
           they
           are
           got
           in
           ,
           they
           will
           Earth
           themselves
           like
           Foxes
           ,
           so
           that
           there
           is
           no
           getting
           them
           out
           again
           .
           The
           Shepherdesses
           of
           Betty-land
           are
           many
           times
           forced
           to
           trust
           them
           with
           very
           great
           secrets
           ,
           which
           when
           they
           come
           to
           the
           knowledge
           of
           ,
           they
           take
           the
           boldness
           to
           do
           what
           they
           list
           :
           These
           are
           the
           Caterpillers
           that
           destroy
           the
           Verdure
           and
           Beauty
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           these
           are
           the
           Moss
           and
           Canker
           that
           hinder
           the
           Orchards
           of
           Betty-land
           from
           bearing
           .
           And
           being
           admitted
           into
           the
           society
           of
           Secresie
           ,
           destroy
           the
           Fe●tili●y
           of
           
           Betty-land
           ,
           by
           teaching
           the
           Shepherdesses
           how
           to
           shun
           the
           pains
           of
           Harvest
           ,
           and
           yet
           enjoy
           all
           the
           full
           content
           of
           the
           Pleasure
           of
           Tillage
           ,
           the
           Truth
           whereof
           is
           confirm'd
           by
           that
           wise
           Husbandman
           Lucretius
           ,
           
             
               Idque
               sui
               causa
               consuerunt
               schorta
               moveri
               ,
            
             
               Ne
               complerentur
               crebro
               gravidaeque
               jacerent
               ,
            
             
               Et
               simul
               ipsa
               vires
               Venus
               &
               concinnior
               esset
               .
            
          
        
         
           How
           did
           that
           Noble
           Shepherdess
           Livia
           handle
           her
           poor
           Shepherd
           Drusus
           ,
           by
           that
           villanous
           cunning
           of
           the
           Emperick
           Eademus
           ?
           How
           did
           Messalina
           lie
           in
           Common
           ,
           and
           bring
           poor
           
           Claudius's
           Farm
           to
           Ruin
           ,
           by
           the
           private
           help
           of
           
             Vestius
             Valentius
          
           ,
           a
           most
           snbtle
           Caterpiller
           of
           an
           Emperick
           ?
           But
           as
           for
           Nurses
           and
           Chamber-Maids
           ,
           
           they
           like
           busie
           Emmets
           or
           Pismires
           ,
           make
           their
           Nests
           in
           all
           parts
           of
           the
           Country
           .
           They
           are
           like
           the
           Pigeons
           bred
           up
           in
           the
           Eastern
           parts
           of
           the
           World
           ,
           to
           convey
           Intelligence
           to
           Towns
           besieg'd
           and
           forreign
           Countries
           ,
           for
           do
           but
           give
           them
           an
           Amorous
           Pullet
           in
           Charge
           ,
           and
           they
           shall
           convey
           it
           through
           all
           the
           Ambushments
           ,
           Snares
           ,
           Traps
           ,
           Gins
           ,
           and
           Co●trivances
           laid
           to
           catch
           them
           ,
           as
           if
           they
           were
           invisible
           :
           whose
           t●ue
           Use
           ,
           Nature
           and
           Property
           ,
           you
           may
           better
           see
           in
           
             Don
             Pedro
             de
             Lopez
          
           ,
           an
           Inhabitant
           in
           that
           part
           of
           
             Betty
             land
          
           called
           Portugal
           ,
           having
           with
           a
           curious
           Eye
           observed
           such
           Persons
           as
           he
           judged
           fitting
           to
           enjoy
           his
           Person
           ,
           at
           length
           plac'd
           his
           Affection
           upon
           a
           Shepherdess
           in
           that
           Country
           named
           Cleandra
           ,
           who
           was
           easily
           perswaded
           by
           his
           Wealth
           to
           yield
           her self
           wholly
           to
           his
           disposal
           :
           
           Among
           the
           rest
           of
           this
           Shepherds
           Acquaintance
           ,
           was
           one
           Lysarchus
           ,
           whom
           Cleandra
           no
           sooner
           saw
           ,
           but
           she
           judg'd
           him
           worth
           to
           bear
           a
           part
           in
           that
           Kindness
           which
           she
           shewed
           her
           own
           Shepherd
           .
           Lysarchus
           percieving
           how
           things
           stood
           ,
           resolv'd
           with
           all
           Secrecy
           to
           manage
           his
           Affairs
           .
           
             De
             Lopez
          
           with
           jealous
           Eyes
           beheld
           the
           more
           than
           usual
           Familiarity
           between
           Lysarchus
           and
           Cleandra
           ,
           and
           resolves
           to
           find
           out
           the
           truth
           :
           whereupon
           he
           feign'd
           a
           Journy
           to
           some
           other
           part
           of
           the
           Country
           ,
           pretending
           Occasions
           that
           would
           stay
           himfor
           some
           time
           ,
           but
           returning
           privately
           the
           same
           night
           ,
           found
           Lysarchus
           and
           Cleandra
           together
           ,
           in
           the
           most
           forbidden
           place
           by
           Friendship
           in
           the
           whole
           World
           ;
           such
           was
           the
           injur'd
           Shepherds
           Amazement
           then
           ,
           that
           he
           would
           have
           slain
           them
           both
           presently
           ,
           but
           upon
           the
           retreat
           of
           his
           Passion
           ,
           minding
           to
           
           give
           them
           both
           some
           time
           of
           preparation
           ,
           wished
           for
           his
           Boy
           to
           fetch
           him
           one
           of
           the
           Priests
           of
           Pan
           ,
           intending
           after
           he
           had
           fitted
           them
           to
           Sacrifice
           them
           both
           to
           that
           Deity
           ,
           being
           the
           only
           horned
           God
           which
           the
           Poets
           mention
           .
        
         
           But
           to
           the
           Application
           of
           the
           Story
           ,
           this
           Shepherd
           had
           an
           old
           Nurse
           ,
           who
           had
           been
           a
           notable
           Syren
           in
           her
           time
           :
           who
           hearing
           the
           Passion
           of
           
             De
             Lopez
          
           ,
           and
           the
           Charge
           which
           he
           gave
           the
           Boy
           :
           Gets
           up
           ,
           follows
           the
           Boy
           over
           the
           Plains
           ,
           bids
           him
           go
           privately
           home
           to
           sleep
           ,
           for
           she
           would
           fetch
           the
           Priest
           of
           Pan
           her self
           ,
           which
           the
           Boy
           tyred
           with
           keeping
           his
           Masters
           Sheep
           ,
           readily
           obey'd
           ;
           so
           coming
           to
           a
           Priest
           ,
           she
           borrows
           the
           Habits
           of
           his
           Profession
           ,
           returning
           she
           put
           them
           on
           ,
           and
           coming
           back
           to
           the
           Shepherds
           Cottage
           ,
           she
           found
           the
           Shepherd
           with
           the
           Instruments
           of
           Death
           in
           his
           
           hand
           ,
           walking
           in
           a
           furious
           manner
           in
           the
           next
           Apartment
           where
           Lysarchus
           and
           Cleandra
           lay
           asleep
           .
           The
           Shepherd
           perceiving
           her
           enter
           ,
           mistaking
           her
           in
           Disguise
           for
           the
           Priest
           ,
           bid
           her
           go
           in
           ,
           awake
           them
           both
           ,
           and
           prepare
           them
           for
           Sacrifice
           .
           The
           Nurse
           answered
           him
           ,
           That
           she
           would
           not
           dispute
           the
           Justice
           of
           his
           Revenge
           ,
           only
           entreated
           him
           not
           to
           disturb
           them
           till
           her
           Return
           ,
           so
           entring
           into
           the
           Chamber
           ,
           she
           found
           the
           two
           Inhabitants
           of
           Betty-land
           Embracing
           one
           another
           after
           the
           Fashion
           of
           the
           Country
           :
           she
           awaked
           them
           ,
           and
           acquainted
           them
           of
           the
           Shepherds
           Return
           ,
           what
           he
           had
           seen
           ,
           his
           Fury
           and
           Intention
           :
           which
           so
           surpriz'd
           them
           ,
           that
           it
           almost
           deprived
           them
           of
           their
           Sences
           .
           But
           ,
           quoth
           the
           Nurse
           ,
           hear
           the
           way
           that
           I
           propose
           both
           to
           deceive
           and
           satisfie
           the
           Shepherd
           .
           Here
           ,
           quoth
           she
           ,
           to
           Lysarchus
           ,
           take
           this
           Habit
           ,
           
           and
           put
           it
           on
           ,
           and
           then
           you
           may
           adventure
           out
           ,
           for
           the
           shepherd
           will
           mistake
           you
           for
           the
           Priest
           ,
           which
           I
           Counterfeit
           .
           Up
           gets
           Lysarchus
           ,
           while
           the
           Nurse
           laid
           her self
           in
           the
           same
           place
           ;
           as
           he
           went
           forth
           the
           Shepherd
           met
           him
           ,
           and
           only
           asked
           him
           if
           he
           had
           done
           what
           he
           was
           sent
           for
           ?
           who
           reply'd
           ,
           he
           had
           perform'd
           his
           Pleasure
           :
           the
           Shepherd
           then
           entring
           into
           
           Cleandra's
           Apartment
           ,
           False
           Shepherdess
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           behold
           him
           here
           whom
           you
           have
           wronged
           ,
           I
           hope
           you
           are
           sufficiently
           prepar'd
           for
           Sacrifice
           .
           To
           which
           ,
           she
           faintly
           answer'd
           ,
           Alas
           !
           dear
           shepherd
           ,
           first
           let
           me
           know
           my
           Crime
           ,
           before
           I
           receive
           my
           Punishment
           .
           Can
           you
           be
           Innocent
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           and
           yet
           admit
           strange
           Cattle
           into
           my
           Enclosure
           ?
           Oh
           dire
           mistake
           ,
           quoth
           she
           !
           and
           then
           uncovering
           the
           Nurses
           Face
           ,
           see
           here
           the
           strange
           Heiser
           that
           Grazes
           in
           your
           Meadow
           ,
           
           in
           your
           Absence
           I
           only
           took
           my
           Nurse
           a-field
           with
           me
           to
           bear
           me
           Company
           .
           At
           these
           words
           the
           Shepherd
           stood
           amaz'd
           with
           Joy
           and
           Grief
           ;
           with
           Grief
           ,
           to
           have
           unjustly
           suspected
           her
           ;
           with
           Joy
           ,
           to
           find
           himself
           mistaken
           :
           which
           immediately
           caus'd
           him
           to
           Embrace
           her
           ,
           &
           to
           promise
           her
           for
           the
           future
           ,
           never
           to
           harbor
           an
           ill
           Thought
           of
           her
           .
           So
           subtle
           are
           these
           Betty-land
           Nurses
           in
           promoting
           and
           concealing
           Bettyland
           -
           Love
           ,
           and
           deceiving
           the
           poor
           Shepherds
           ;
           for
           as
           they
           are
           generally
           very
           great
           Thieves
           themselves
           ,
           so
           they
           never
           value
           the
           robbing
           their
           Masters
           Fruit
           ,
           the
           breaking
           of
           his
           Hedges
           ,
           and
           what
           strange
           Cattle
           seed
           upon
           his
           Tillage
           :
           The
           people
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           especially
           the
           better
           sort
           ,
           spend
           much
           of
           their
           time
           in
           the
           Fields
           and
           Gardens
           ,
           which
           by
           some
           of
           the
           meaner
           Sheph●rds
           ,
           are
           kept
           beautifi'd
           
           and
           trim'd
           ,
           for
           the
           publick
           Receipt
           and
           Entertainment
           of
           all
           comers
           .
           There
           also
           you
           may
           have
           Collations
           of
           all
           sorts
           ,
           and
           several
           Varieties
           of
           delightful
           Liquors
           ,
           but
           so
           excessively
           dear
           ,
           as
           if
           Betty-land
           -
           Love
           and
           Expence
           were
           both
           born
           Twins
           .
           And
           it
           is
           most
           certainly
           averred
           ,
           that
           the
           Son
           of
           Neptune
           and
           Father
           of
           Orion
           ,
           Entertained
           three
           of
           the
           greatest
           Gods
           then
           in
           being
           ,
           at
           less
           Charge
           than
           a
           Shepherd
           can
           entertain
           3
           Shepherdesses
           in
           one
           of
           these
           Gardens
           .
           For
           such
           is
           the
           potent
           Virtue
           of
           Rhenish-Wine
           and
           Sugar
           for
           Commotion
           ,
           that
           tho
           the
           Shepherdesses
           rose
           but
           2
           hours
           before
           from
           a
           plentiful
           Meal
           ,
           yet
           you
           shall
           see
           them
           fall
           upon
           the
           Junkets
           of
           these
           places
           with
           so
           much
           fresh
           Fury
           ,
           and
           devour
           with
           so
           much
           Greediness
           ,
           as
           if
           they
           had
           never
           eaten
           before
           ,
           or
           that
           they
           were
           not
           to
           feed
           again
           in
           half
           a
           year
           after
           :
           To
           ask
           the
           price
           of
           
           anything
           herein
           this
           place
           ,
           or
           to
           question
           the
           Bill
           when
           it
           is
           brought
           up
           ,
           is
           a
           Crime
           as
           inexpiable
           as
           the
           Gods
           to
           swear
           by
           Stix
           ,
           and
           to
           be
           perjur'd
           ;
           for
           Betty-land
           is
           at
           a
           perfect
           Antipathy
           with
           all
           manner
           of
           Frugality
           ,
           and
           the
           Shepherdesses
           (
           like
           the
           Husbandmen
           of
           Aegypt
           that
           guess
           at
           the
           Fertility
           of
           the
           Year
           by
           the
           overflowing
           of
           Nile
           )
           make
           their
           chief
           Conject●res
           what
           manner
           of
           Lives
           they
           shall
           lead
           ,
           when
           marryed
           to
           their
           Shepherds
           ,
           by
           the
           overslowing
           Prodigality
           of
           the
           Shepherds
           Pockets
           in
           these
           places
           ,
           so
           that
           unless
           a
           Shepherd
           comes
           very
           well
           provided
           into
           one
           of
           these
           Gardens
           ,
           he
           shall
           find
           himself
           so
           intreagu'd
           in
           a
           Reckoning
           ,
           that
           instead
           of
           an
           Hesperian
           Garden
           ,
           or
           the
           Thessalonian
           Tempe
           ,
           he
           finds
           himself
           in
           one
           of
           the
           Labyrinths
           of
           Minos
           ,
           out
           of
           which
           he
           shall
           not
           be
           able
           to
           find
           the
           way
           ,
           till
           he
           has
           pawn'd
           
           to
           the
           owner
           his
           Faith
           and
           Honor
           to
           make
           amends
           to
           morrow
           .
           This
           ,
           if
           it
           be
           discovered
           among
           the
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           into
           what
           a
           F●yer
           it
           puts
           the
           poor
           Shepherd
           ,
           what
           Shifts
           ,
           what
           Excuses
           ,
           he
           is
           forced
           to
           pump
           for
           and
           borrow
           from
           his
           wrackt
           Invention
           .
           But
           the
           Shepherdesses
           laugh
           and
           whisper
           ,
           and
           are
           glad
           of
           the
           Occasion
           ,
           for
           they
           are
           sure
           now
           he
           must
           make
           them
           3
           or
           4
           Treatments
           more
           to
           secure
           his
           Credit
           :
           Eumolpus
           coming
           one
           day
           into
           one
           of
           these
           Gardens
           ,
           observ'd
           a
           melancholly
           Shepherd
           walking
           by
           himself
           ,
           with
           so
           flow
           a
           pace
           ,
           as
           if
           it
           had
           been
           his
           business
           to
           measure
           the
           ground
           ,
           or
           that
           he
           had
           been
           studying
           for
           Sonnets
           :
           his
           Physiognomy
           shewed
           much
           of
           self-Conceit
           ,
           and
           ●uch
           of
           Discontent
           ,
           as
           a
           place
           where
           all
           others
           display'd
           a
           geneneral
           Jollity
           of
           Humor
           in
           their
           Faces
           ,
           his
           Singularity
           made
           Eumolpus
           
           resolv'd
           to
           attaque
           him
           ,
           who
           made
           several
           turns
           Cheek
           by
           Jole
           with
           him
           ,
           expecting
           the
           time
           when
           he
           would
           unlock
           the
           Cabinet
           of
           his
           Lips
           :
           but
           finding
           him
           very
           frugal
           of
           his
           words
           ,
           Sir
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           I
           have
           seldom
           come
           into
           a
           pleasanter
           Garden
           ,
           nor
           in
           pleasanter
           Weather
           ,
           at
           which
           words
           the
           sad
           Shepherd
           taking
           his
           Right
           Elbow
           in
           his
           left
           Palm
           ,
           and
           picking
           his
           Nose
           with
           his
           Thumb
           ,
           Yes
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           the
           place
           is
           pleasant
           enough
           to
           such
           young
           Gallants
           as
           you
           ,
           that
           have
           Mony
           enough
           .
           Is
           Mony
           then
           the
           Cause
           ,
           said
           Eumolpus
           ,
           that
           the
           Leaves
           look
           so
           green
           ?
           that
           the
           Birds
           are
           so
           merry
           ?
           or
           that
           the
           Sun
           shines
           so
           bright
           ?
           No
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           but
           't
           is
           the
           Mony
           in
           the
           Shepherd's
           Pockets
           that
           make
           the
           Shepherdess●s
           look
           so
           wantonly
           ,
           Pluto
           and
           Cerberus
           take
           them
           all
           for
           me
           ,
           and
           the
           Eumenides
           claw
           their
           Buttocks
           ,
           as
           some
           of
           them
           
           have
           claw'd
           my
           Pockets
           .
           I
           have
           been
           as
           great
           a
           haunter
           of
           these
           Gardens
           ,
           as
           the
           best
           of
           them
           all
           ,
           and
           when
           all
           was
           a
           going
           ,
           I
           cry'd
           ,
           
             Sera
             est
             in
             fundo
             Parsimonia
          
           ,
           and
           that
           cursed
           Proverb
           hath
           left
           me
           n●ver
           a
           Groat
           in
           my
           Purse
           .
           But
           I
           am
           come
           here
           to
           Imprint
           the
           Disdain
           of
           my
           Folly
           the
           deeper
           into
           my
           Breast
           by
           the
           sight
           of
           those
           places
           where
           my
           Folly
           bewitcht
           me
           :
           Nothing
           vexes
           me
           ,
           but
           that
           I
           have
           spent
           my
           Fortune
           upon
           Petticoats
           ,
           and
           in
           adoring
           such
           a
           sort
           of
           Goddesses
           ,
           that
           are
           the
           most
           peccant
           in
           the
           World
           ,
           especially
           as
           to
           that
           abominable
           Sin
           of
           Ingratitude
           .
           Ask
           them
           but
           only
           to
           let
           you
           have
           a
           Child
           ,
           as
           the
           Gods
           gave
           Hiaereus
           for
           his
           loving
           Entertainment
           ,
           and
           they
           plead
           so
           many
           Inconveniences
           ,
           as
           if
           there
           were
           no
           Mandrakes
           or
           Savine
           in
           the
           Country
           ,
           for
           they
           generally
           reserve
           those
           Favors
           ,
           for
           those
           that
           
           are
           less
           bountiful
           ,
           in
           that
           only
           kind
           that
           they
           believe
           it
           too
           severe
           that
           a
           poor
           Shepherd
           should
           empty
           two
           Purses
           at
           one
           time
           .
           Eumolpus
           to
           gain
           a
           further
           discovery
           from
           his
           inward
           Dissatisfaction
           ,
           invited
           the
           sad
           Shepherd
           to
           drink
           a
           Bottle
           of
           Wine
           in
           an
           adjoyning
           A●bor
           ,
           where
           the
           distance
           of
           the
           ●eaves
           afforded
           Casements
           sufficient
           to
           take
           a
           view
           of
           all
           that
           passed
           by
           .
           Fi●st
           came
           along
           a
           brisk
           young
           Shepherd
           ,
           so
           gay
           and
           so
           be-ribon'd
           ,
           that
           he
           seem'd
           to
           have
           a
           Nose-Gay
           (
           of
           all
           the
           Flowers
           then
           flourishing
           )
           upon
           his
           Cod-piece
           ,
           his
           Breeches
           lookt
           as
           if
           they
           had
           been
           beset
           with
           Tulips
           ,
           as
           if
           what
           they
           cover'd
           conceal'd
           the
           same
           Spring
           and
           lively
           Vigor
           as
           the
           Earth
           that
           produc'd
           the
           natural
           Colours
           :
           he
           spoke
           in
           Raptures
           ,
           for
           he
           disdained
           the
           very
           Sun
           that
           gliss'ned
           upon
           his
           Carnations
           in
           comparison
           of
           those
           Suns
           which
           
           were
           by
           and
           by
           to
           devour
           his
           Tarts
           .
           If
           a
           Nightingale
           chanc'd
           to
           Warble
           ,
           O
           Madam
           !
           quoth
           he
           ,
           this
           is
           Incomparable
           ,
           but
           nothing
           to
           the
           divine
           Melody
           of
           your
           Charming
           Voice
           ;
           his
           officious
           hand
           carryed
           the
           Shepherdesses
           Fan
           ,
           and
           sometimes
           he
           cool'd
           himself
           ,
           &
           sometimes
           her
           ,
           and
           when
           he
           took
           it
           from
           her
           Lips
           ,
           he
           breath'd
           out
           nothing
           but
           Sighs
           ,
           that
           
             Arabia
             Faelix
          
           had
           lost
           all
           her
           Odors
           :
           The
           Shepherdesses
           that
           Grac't
           his
           Company
           were
           like
           so
           many
           
           Iris's
           ,
           full
           as
           Gay
           ,
           and
           altogether
           as
           full
           of
           Tongue
           ,
           laughing
           and
           smiling
           they
           threw
           their
           heads
           about
           ,
           as
           if
           they
           had
           been
           willing
           they
           should
           have
           fallen
           from
           their
           Shoulders
           ,
           to
           have
           been
           taken
           up
           like
           their
           Gloves
           ;
           so
           merry
           and
           so
           wanton
           ,
           as
           if
           they
           had
           never
           known
           a
           melancholly
           Thought
           ;
           so
           far
           from
           s●eming
           to
           have
           never
           been
           in
           Love
           ,
           that
           they
           seem'd
           to
           be
           the
           
           Controllers
           of
           Love
           himself
           .
           The
           sad
           Shepherd
           ,
           at
           their
           approach
           made
           them
           a
           most
           Reverend
           Obeysance
           ,
           which
           they
           as
           mildly
           return'd
           ,
           calling
           him
           by
           his
           name
           ,
           but
           they
           were
           no
           sooner
           past
           ,
           but
           he
           laid
           violent
           hands
           upon
           his
           own
           Hair
           ,
           with
           such
           a
           passion
           ,
           as
           if
           he
           would
           have
           pulled
           off
           as
           much
           as
           would
           have
           made
           a
           Scourge
           to
           have
           driven
           them
           out
           of
           the
           Alley
           .
           These
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           I
           know
           very
           well
           ,
           and
           they
           know
           me
           ,
           and
           good
           Reason
           they
           have
           ;
           for
           ,
           quoth
           he
           —
           casting
           a
           grim
           look
           after
           them
           —
           but
           let
           that
           pass
           .
           These
           are
           they
           that
           are
           called
           by
           the
           names
           of
           
             Precious
             Ones
          
           ,
           because
           of
           their
           Youth
           and
           Beauty
           ,
           and
           their
           civil
           Easiness
           to
           receive
           the
           Caress
           of
           a
           Treatment
           .
           They
           go
           for
           great
           Fortunes
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           but
           if
           the
           Shepherds
           their
           Fathers
           could
           put
           them
           off
           with
           those
           Clothes
           ,
           the
           Devil
           of
           a
           Rag
           more
           
           would
           they
           give
           them
           .
           Could
           there
           be
           but
           one
           found
           among
           them
           that
           had
           but
           a
           Portion
           really
           half
           as
           large
           as
           her
           Swallow
           ,
           I
           fear
           I
           should
           go
           to
           my
           old
           trade
           again
           ,
           and
           strive
           to
           undo
           one
           Taylor
           more
           than
           I
           have
           done
           :
           By
           and
           by
           came
           another
           Shepherd
           with
           a
           gang
           of
           another
           so●t
           of
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           they
           were
           as
           glorious
           as
           the
           former
           ,
           but
           not
           so
           young
           as
           they
           ,
           nor
           altogether
           so
           Handsom
           ,
           they
           seem'd
           to
           move
           in
           a
           dancing
           posture
           ,
           and
           now
           and
           then
           they
           would
           sing
           half
           a
           dozen
           Notes
           of
           a
           new
           Air
           :
           in
           their
           Discourse
           they
           seem'd
           to
           hold
           Arguments
           ,
           and
           to
           talk
           upon
           Themes
           of
           Love
           ;
           whatever
           they
           said
           ,
           it
           was
           not
           for
           the
           Shepherd
           to
           reply
           ,
           but
           only
           to
           listen
           ,
           bow
           ,
           and
           smile
           ,
           and
           make
           a
           nod
           upon
           me
           of
           those
           that
           said
           nothing
           .
           However
           the
           sad
           Shepherd
           struck
           to
           them
           as
           they
           pass'd
           along
           ,
           but
           when
           they
           were
           gone
           ,
           these
           are
           they
           ,
           
           quoth
           he
           ,
           that
           are
           called
           the
           
             Ravishing
             Ones
          
           .
           They
           are
           Witty
           ,
           but
           seldom
           Rich
           ,
           which
           makes
           them
           the
           more
           easie
           of
           Access
           :
           They
           look
           High
           ,
           and
           their
           chief
           Expectation
           is
           ,
           when
           a
           wealthy
           Shepherd
           will
           fall
           into
           the
           Trap
           of
           their
           Admiration
           ,
           they
           gull
           ,
           and
           are
           gull'd
           ,
           for
           the
           Shepherds
           that
           obtain
           them
           ,
           never
           think
           of
           marrying
           till
           they
           are
           upon
           their
           last
           Legs
           .
           In
           short
           ,
           as
           it
           is
           their
           chiefest
           Aim
           ,
           so
           they
           make
           more
           Rapes
           upon
           the
           Purse
           ,
           than
           upon
           the
           Heart
           .
           By
           and
           by
           another
           Shepherd
           ,
           with
           a
           little
           small
           Shepher●●
           his
           hand
           ,
           no
           taller
           than
           the
           wastband
           of
           his
           Breeches
           ,
           so
           that
           he
           lookt
           like
           the
           Fellow
           with
           his
           Brother
           growing
           out
           of
           his
           side
           ,
           you
           would
           not
           think
           how
           she
           prinkt
           it
           and
           prankt
           it
           ,
           and
           peer'd
           up
           in
           the
           Shepherd's
           Face
           ,
           she
           was
           always
           for
           looking
           back
           upon
           those
           that
           passed
           by
           her
           taller
           
           than
           her self
           .
           The
           main
           of
           her
           Discourse
           was
           ,
           no
           I
           'le
           sweat
           ,
           no
           I
           vow
           ,
           no
           —
           Pish
           —
           The
           sad
           Sh●pherd
           put
           off
           his
           Hat
           to
           her
           ,
           as
           well
           as
           to
           the
           rest
           ,
           for
           which
           he
           receiv'd
           a
           Courtesie
           with
           her
           Chin
           in
           her
           Neck
           .
           There
           's
           one
           of
           the
           
             Mi●cing
             Mi●i●●
          
           quoth
           he
           ,
           she
           's
           Rich
           ,
           but
           her
           Wit
           and
           her
           Wast
           are
           both
           of
           a
           size
           .
           The
           next
           that
           followed
           ,
           were
           3
           strapping
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           Elderly
           in
           years
           ,
           they
           sang
           and
           giggled
           ;
           and
           shew'd
           a
           large
           sto●k
           of
           Con●idence
           ,
           they
           had
           no
           Shepherd
           to
           attend
           them
           ,
           yet
           they
           were
           s●luted
           by
           many
           ,
           with
           your
           humble
           Servant
           Lady's
           .
           The
           sad
           Shepherd
           little
           regarded
           them
           ,
           for
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           these
           are
           the
           
             Evaporated
             Ones
          
           ,
           they
           are
           almost
           out
           of
           date
           ,
           yet
           sing
           prick-Song
           without
           Book
           ,
           and
           discourse
           upon
           all
           Subjects
           without
           fear
           or
           wit
           ,
           tho
           they
           bear
           no
           ●alice
           to
           any
           person
           ,
           if
           you
           will
           be
           so
           credulous
           as
           to
           believe
           
           what
           they
           say
           .
           Toward
           the
           Evening
           ,
           and
           just
           upon
           Sun-set
           ,
           we
           heard
           a
           couple
           of
           Chariots
           stop
           at
           the
           Garden-Gate
           ,
           and
           strait
           in
           marcht
           a
           Crew
           of
           Shepherds
           and
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           the
           Shepherds
           huffing
           and
           dinging
           ,
           the
           Shepherdesses
           flanting
           and
           ranting
           ;
           
           Iuno's
           with
           Ganimedes
           bearing
           their
           Trains
           ,
           they
           did
           so
           lowt
           and
           stare
           ,
           that
           they
           clear'd
           all
           before
           them
           ,
           their
           Talk
           was
           lowd
           ,
           and
           presently
           the
           Husbandman
           that
           owned
           the
           Garden
           was
           called
           for
           ,
           who
           came
           creeping
           and
           cringing
           to
           receive
           their
           Commands
           .
           These
           presently
           enquired
           what
           Rarities
           he
           had
           ready
           ,
           who
           presently
           returned
           them
           a
           Banquet
           of
           hard
           Names
           ,
           that
           would
           have
           puzzled
           the
           Master
           of
           
           Paul's
           School
           ,
           or
           the
           Art
           of
           Memory
           it self
           .
           Have
           you
           any
           Champignions
           ,
           crys
           one
           of
           the
           Shepherds
           ?
           yes
           and
           it
           please
           you
           ,
           cry's
           the
           Husbandman
           ,
           drest
           
             a-la-mode
             
             de
             France
          
           cry'd
           the
           Shepherd
           ?
           Yes
           ,
           and
           it
           like
           your
           Honor
           ,
           quoth
           the
           Husbandman
           ,
           for
           I
           hate
           the
           damn'd
           English
           way
           of
           dressing
           Champignions
           ,
           for
           the
           
             Devil
             Damme
          
           ,
           Madam
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           if
           they
           don't
           make
           me
           sick
           .
           The
           sad
           Shepherd
           made
           his
           Obeysance
           to
           them
           ,
           as
           they
           passed
           along
           ,
           but
           they
           little
           regarded
           him
           .
           These
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           are
           the
           most
           ingrateful
           Shepherdesses
           of
           all
           living
           ,
           for
           when
           you
           have
           spent
           all
           your
           Estate
           and
           all
           your
           Marrow
           to
           boot
           on
           them
           ,
           they
           think
           they
           have
           received
           nothing
           but
           their
           due
           .
           The
           Reason
           why
           they
           appear
           in
           the
           Dark
           is
           ,
           because
           they
           fly
           the
           Sun
           ,
           as
           the
           other
           avoid
           the
           Rain
           ,
           the
           Sun
           annoys
           their
           Faces
           ,
           more
           than
           Rain
           the
           others
           habits
           .
           For
           these
           are
           they
           who
           are
           called
           
             Besmeared
             Ones
             ,
             Varnish-Daubers
          
           ,
           to
           whom
           Phaebus
           is
           a
           great
           Enemy
           ,
           whilst
           Plaisterers
           
           and
           Red-Painters
           ,
           with
           whom
           when
           a
           Man
           converses
           ,
           he
           talks
           to
           that
           which
           is
           not
           .
           He
           believes
           that
           such
           a
           one
           speaks
           to
           him
           ,
           when
           there
           is
           no
           such
           thing
           ,
           no
           wonder
           no
           Painter
           can
           draw
           them
           right
           ,
           when
           they
           draw
           themselves
           so
           wrong
           ,
           nor
           is
           it
           a
           wonder
           they
           should
           so
           much
           forget
           thems●lves
           ,
           that
           in
           a
           short
           time
           are
           not
           able
           to
           know
           their
           own
           Faces
           when
           they
           meet
           them
           in
           their
           Looking-Glasses
           .
           The
           poor
           Shepherds
           seem
           to
           be
           accompanied
           only
           with
           the
           beloved
           Statues
           of
           their
           own
           making
           ,
           enlivened
           by
           the
           kindness
           of
           the
           Gods
           and
           their
           own
           importunate
           Prayers
           .
           Time
           ploughs
           up
           their
           Faces
           ,
           but
           they
           fill
           up
           the
           Furrows
           so
           thick
           ,
           that
           when
           they
           are
           dead
           ,
           they
           look
           like
           meer
           pieces
           of
           Plaister
           of
           Paris
           .
           They
           retir'd
           to
           their
           Collation
           ,
           and
           we
           stayed
           
           their
           return
           ,
           when
           they
           were
           gone
           we
           thought
           it
           time
           to
           go
           too
           ,
           ●o
           marching
           out
           we
           met
           the
           husbandman
           of
           the
           house
           coming
           from
           the
           Gate
           muttering
           and
           swearing
           to
           himself
           .
           What
           cause
           of
           so
           much
           wrath
           ,
           quoth
           the
           sad
           Shepherd
           ;
           to
           whom
           the
           husbandmam
           cha●ing
           and
           fretting
           return'd
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           These
           Gay
           Shepherdesses
           ye
           saw
           last
           ,
           have
           devoured
           above
           three
           Pounds
           ,
           and
           the
           hu●●ing
           Shepherd
           that
           Treated
           them
           had
           no
           Mony
           ,
           but
           hath
           sent
           me
           with
           a
           Note
           to
           his
           Grocer
           to
           take
           it
           out
           in
           Tobacco
           .
           This
           is
           my
           Comfort
           ,
           that
           if
           the
           Grocer
           be
           wise
           we
           may
           chance
           to
           make
           the
           Fool
           pay
           six
           for
           his
           three
           :
           There
           's
           no
           trusting
           without
           Pro●it
           ,
           Nature
           will
           have
           it
           so
           ,
           we
           were
           born
           to
           get
           ,
           and
           they
           to
           spend
           .
           They
           say
           ,
           quoth
           the
           sad
           Shepherd
           ,
           the
           Garden
           of
           Eden
           is
           no
           where
           to
           be
           found
           ,
           
           what
           if
           it
           be
           not
           ,
           were
           I
           an
           Antiquary
           ,
           trust
           me
           ,
           if
           I
           would
           wast
           one
           quarter
           of
           a
           sheet
           about
           in
           ,
           for
           here
           is
           a
           Garden
           as
           like
           it
           as
           can
           be
           imagined
           ,
           here
           is
           the
           knowledge
           of
           Good
           and
           Evil
           ,
           here
           is
           the
           Forbidden-Fruit
           ,
           here
           is
           the
           Tempter
           and
           the
           Tempted
           .
           There
           is
           only
           the
           difference
           that
           in
           the
           first
           Eden
           the
           Serpent
           was
           too
           Cunning
           for
           the
           Woman
           ,
           here
           the
           Women
           are
           too
           Cunning
           for
           the
           
             Serpents
             .
             Iupiter
          
           defend
           me
           !
           how
           these
           empty
           -
           skull'd
           Shepherds
           will
           boast
           to
           morrow
           at
           their
           Ordinary
           ,
           of
           the
           Honor
           they
           had
           to
           keep
           Company
           with
           these
           painted
           Images
           ,
           all
           the
           Table
           shall
           ring
           of
           the
           Favor
           she
           did
           him
           to
           let
           him
           kiss
           her
           Hand
           ,
           to
           tell
           him
           this
           or
           t'other
           Story
           :
           Nor
           is
           this
           Career
           to
           be
           stopt
           till
           some
           Cynical
           Shepherd
           stands
           up
           and
           swears
           he
           had
           rather
           keep
           company
           with
           a
           Kitchen-Wench
           ,
           than
           
           a
           painted
           Shepherdess
           :
           upon
           this
           they
           go
           together
           by
           the
           Ears
           ,
           and
           it
           looks
           like
           the
           Contest
           between
           the
           Greek
           and
           Roman
           Church
           ,
           whether
           Images
           or
           no
           Images
           ,
           so
           long
           as
           there
           is
           no
           other
           harm
           done
           ,
           't
           is
           not
           unpleasant
           to
           see
           one
           carry
           his
           Arm
           in
           a
           Scarf
           ,
           another
           with
           a
           black
           piece
           of
           Sarcenet
           upon
           his
           Knuckles
           .
           Paris
           had
           never
           more
           Right
           to
           Helena
           ,
           nor
           Perseus
           to
           Andromeda
           ,
           than
           they
           believe
           themselves
           to
           have
           right
           to
           the
           vindicated
           Shepherdess
           .
           If
           they
           prick
           one
           another
           upon
           Putney
           -
           Heath
           ,
           or
           in
           Barn-Elm
           -
           Fields
           ,
           't
           is
           not
           half
           a
           penny
           matter
           ,
           it
           does
           but
           wast
           the
           unruly
           Red
           ,
           that
           would
           turn
           to
           unruly
           white
           ,
           so
           long
           as
           no
           person
           falls
           a
           Sacrifice
           to
           the
           fucus'd
           Diety
           .
        
         
           Could
           Man
           but
           view
           from
           some
           remoter
           Sphere
           ,
        
         
         
           The
           idle
           businesses
           of
           Man-kind
           here
           ;
        
         
           With
           how
           much
           Industry
           some
           Men
           contrive
           ;
        
         
           Scarce
           to
           keep
           any
           but
           themselves
           alive
           :
        
         
           With
           how
           much
           Pains
           and
           Sweat
           some
           Men
           design
           ,
        
         
           To
           wast
           their
           Fathers
           Care
           in
           Dice
           and
           Wine
           .
        
         
           Whilst
           others
           on
           a
           Nose
           or
           Eye
           shall
           spend
           .
        
         
           A
           whole
           years
           Thri●t
           before
           an
           hour
           can
           end
           ;
        
         
           They'd
           swear
           that
           time
           were
           now
           grown
           prodigal
           ,
        
         
           Of
           his
           own
           hours
           ,
           and
           Fate
           more
           lavish
           call
           :
        
         
           To
           give
           so
           long
           a
           Life
           to
           foolish
           Men
           ,
        
         
           To
           spend
           in
           ore
           and
           ore
           the
           same
           agen
           .
        
         
           And
           would
           not
           Bartholin
           now
           laugh
           to
           hear
           ,
        
         
         
           Ye
           say
           such
           Souls
           as
           these
           Immortal
           were
           !
        
         
           Souls
           that
           no
           better
           seek
           nor
           better
           know
           ,
        
         
           But
           are
           content
           with
           Pleasures
           only
           show
           .
        
         
           Immortal
           Souls
           know
           more
           ,
           if
           we
           guess
           right
           ,
        
         
           And
           Body's
           must
           be
           chang'd
           to
           clear
           the
           sight
           :
        
         
           But
           tho
           the
           Body
           's
           chang'd
           there
           's
           none
           that
           say
        
         
           The
           Soul
           shall
           e're
           be
           chang'd
           at
           any
           day
           :
        
         
           Then
           only
           earthly
           Mixtures
           must
           Compose
           ,
        
         
           Such
           Frames
           where
           such
           mean
           Satisfaction
           grows
           .
        
         
           The
           Education
           of
           the
           Shepherdesses
           and
           Huswifes
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           is
           most
           preposterous
           and
           contrary
           to
           the
           Politick
           Rules
           of
           all
           other
           Governments
           .
           The
           better
           sort
           are
           
           generally
           bred
           up
           in
           the
           Imagina●y
           Castles
           and
           Towers
           of
           Acrisius
           ,
           called
           Boarding-Schools
           ,
           kept
           by
           a
           certain
           sort
           of
           she-Creatures
           that
           will
           pretend
           to
           be
           whatever
           you
           will
           have
           them
           to
           be
           :
           say
           they
           shall
           be
           she-Draggons
           ,
           and
           they
           shall
           be
           such
           ,
           if
           you
           would
           have
           them
           to
           be
           the
           Arguses
           ,
           they
           shall
           perswade
           ye
           that
           they
           are
           such
           ,
           and
           rather
           than
           excuse
           themselves
           for
           not
           having
           so
           many
           Eyes
           as
           he
           had
           ,
           they
           shall
           allow
           you
           sixscore
           to
           the
           hundred
           .
           And
           withal
           to
           magnifie
           the
           security
           of
           their
           Vigilancy
           ,
           that
           the
           very
           Sun
           it self
           shall
           not
           dare
           to
           peep
           through
           the
           Glass
           whilst
           they
           are
           in
           the
           Room
           .
           If
           you
           will
           have
           them
           to
           be
           she
           -
           Centaurs
           ,
           she
           -
           Centaurs
           they
           shall
           be
           ,
           of
           which
           there
           appears
           not
           a
           little
           probability
           ,
           for
           in
           these
           places
           it
           is
           ,
           that
           the
           young
           Shepherdesses
           first
           learn
           the
           Art
           of
           Horsemanship
           
           and
           Horse-play
           ,
           first
           riding
           o●e
           another
           ,
           and
           then
           in
           a
           short
           time
           after
           ,
           riding
           quite
           away
           with
           some
           Shepherds
           or
           other
           ,
           to
           the
           great
           Consolation
           of
           their
           Parents
           .
           For
           you
           must
           know
           ,
           that
           Iupiter
           is
           Lord
           of
           the
           Ascendent
           in
           all
           these
           Houses
           ,
           and
           his
           golden
           Showers
           will
           go
           through
           the
           very
           pores
           of
           the
           Tiles
           .
           There
           are
           Appurtenances
           belonging
           to
           those
           Houses
           of
           Female
           Instruction
           .
           Imprimis
           ,
           Dancing-Masters
           ,
           a
           certain
           sort
           of
           Cattle
           ,
           to
           which
           the
           young
           Shepherdesses
           give
           more
           Adoration
           ,
           than
           the
           Aegyptian
           to
           their
           Cow
           Isis.
           Meer
           Apes
           ,
           and
           the
           worst
           of
           Apes
           ,
           as
           being
           French
           Apes
           ,
           herein
           unfortunate
           that
           there
           never
           was
           any
           foolery
           invented
           yet
           ,
           so
           impertinent
           and
           unnecessary
           in
           the
           world
           as
           the
           foolery
           of
           Dancing
           ,
           herein
           fortunate
           ,
           that
           the
           Age
           is
           so
           unfortunate
           to
           
           be
           their
           Apes
           .
           Yet
           the
           young
           Shepherdesses
           endeavour
           to
           imitate
           them
           ,
           and
           the
           old
           ones
           are
           so
           mad
           as
           to
           let
           them
           ,
           but
           then
           they
           rue
           it
           ,
           when
           they
           find
           the
           young
           Huswifes
           have
           been
           dancing
           so
           long
           that
           they
           can
           hardly
           go
           ,
           for
           the
           weight
           of
           their
           Bellies
           .
           This
           is
           the
           Art
           that
           first
           witches
           them
           to
           kick
           up
           their
           heels
           by
           the
           powerful
           Charms
           of
           gesticular
           and
           obscene
           Motion
           ,
           by
           the
           Opportunities
           of
           palming
           ,
           kissing
           ,
           and
           treading
           upon
           the
           Toe
           ,
           and
           striking
           while
           the
           Iron
           is
           hot
           ,
           which
           is
           the
           Reason
           that
           the
           good
           natur'd
           Souls
           cannot
           refuse
           to
           dance
           a
           Coranto
           with
           the
           Dancing-Master
           himself
           .
           I
           know
           said
           Eumolpus
           in
           one
           small
           place
           of
           Education
           ,
           two
           Families
           of
           3
           Sisters
           apiece
           totally
           laid
           common
           ,
           by
           the
           Ins●nuations
           of
           this
           Art
           ,
           and
           one
           more
           of
           another
           Family
           ,
           which
           me
           thought
           was
           
           pity
           ,
           for
           't
           was
           all
           the
           old
           Shepherd●ss
           had
           .
           Not
           unlikely
           ,
           said
           Eucolpius
           ,
           but
           more
           than
           that
           ,
           how
           many
           Antick
           Dancers
           whose
           Clothes
           have
           been
           made
           streight
           to
           their
           Limbs
           ,
           have
           been
           sent
           far
           off
           the
           Stage
           by
           great
           Shepherdesses
           to
           allay
           the
           strength
           of
           Imagination
           .
           They
           have
           a
           Musician
           too
           ,
           of
           whom
           they
           learn
           half
           a
           dozen
           Lessons
           on
           Virginals
           ,
           and
           3
           or
           4
           sing-Songs
           by
           Rote
           .
           A
           little
           Musick
           goes
           a
           great
           way
           with
           them
           ,
           only
           to
           make
           a
           Caterwauling
           noise
           ,
           when
           their
           Parents
           come
           to
           see
           them
           ,
           and
           to
           show
           they
           do
           not
           give
           their
           Mony
           for
           nothing
           .
           Besides
           all
           this
           ,
           they
           learn
           very
           dextrously
           to
           play
           the
           little
           Thieves
           for
           their
           Bellies
           ,
           to
           Junket
           in
           corners
           ,
           which
           they
           practise
           afterwards
           to
           the
           no
           small
           Expence
           of
           their
           Espousers
           ,
           but
           for
           any
           Documents
           of
           Modesty
           ,
           Chastity
           ,
           good
           Huswifery
           ,
           or
           well
           
           ordering
           of
           a
           Family
           ,
           't
           is
           not
           required
           by
           their
           Parents
           ,
           that
           they
           should
           be
           much
           (
           if
           any
           thing
           at
           all
           )
           instructed
           therein
           ,
           which
           is
           the
           reason
           that
           as
           soon
           as
           they
           come
           out
           of
           these
           places
           ,
           they
           presently
           travel
           into
           Betty-land
           ,
           and
           never
           more
           return
           into
           their
           own
           Country
           .
        
         
           The
           people
           of
           Betty-land
           are
           subject
           to
           several
           Diseases
           ,
           both
           of
           Mind
           and
           Body
           ,
           perticularly
           among
           the
           Females
           ,
           there
           is
           one
           Disease
           that
           universally
           Rages
           ,
           call'd
           
             Furor
             Vterinus
          
           ,
           the
           Stories
           of
           Io
           and
           Pasiphae
           very
           plainly
           demonstrate
           the
           Rage
           of
           this
           Distemper
           .
           The
           first
           of
           which
           was
           in
           such
           a
           Condition
           ,
           that
           she
           run
           lowing
           up
           and
           down
           like
           a
           Cow
           for
           Cure
           ,
           and
           the
           latter
           for
           the
           remedy
           of
           her
           Malady
           ,
           was
           forc't
           to
           make
           use
           of
           a
           Bull.
           Two
           odd
           
           kinds
           of
           Receipts
           you
           'l
           say
           ,
           but
           you
           know
           the
           Rule
           in
           Physick
           ,
           a
           desperate
           Disease
           must
           have
           a
           desperate
           Cure.
           To
           say
           there
           is
           any
           absolute
           Cure
           for
           this
           Disease
           is
           a
           folly
           ,
           for
           there
           is
           nothing
           cures
           it
           but
           death
           ,
           yet
           the
           heat
           and
           present
           fury
           of
           the
           Distemper
           is
           often
           allay'd
           by
           the
           Application
           of
           proper
           Pessaries
           ,
           of
           which
           there
           must
           be
           prepar'd
           Variety
           still
           at
           hand
           ,
           and
           those
           hourly
           made
           use
           of
           ,
           or
           else
           they
           signifie
           nothing
           ,
           of
           this
           Di●temper
           Virgil
           thus
           speaks
           ;
           
             
               
                 Hic
                 Aredelis
                 amor
                 tauri
                 suppostaque
                 furto
                 ,
              
               
                 Pasiphae
                 mistumque
                 genus
                 prolesque
                 deformis
                 ,
              
               
                 Minotaurus
                 inest
                 Veneris
                 monumenta
                 nefandae
                 .
              
            
             
               
                 The
                 Bull
                 thus
                 low'd
                 ,
                 and
                 for
                 the
                 sport
                 full
                 fed
              
               
               
                 Into
                 the
                 Straw
                 Pasiphae
                 creeps
                 to
                 Bed
                 ,
              
               
                 Thence'a
                 mixt
                 Off
                 spring
                 ,
                 strange
                 prodigious
                 Fools
                 ,
              
               
                 Men
                 ,
                 Men
                 in
                 all
                 parts
                 ,
                 else
                 〈◊〉
                 foreheads
                 Bulls
                 :
              
               
                 For
                 Minotaurs
                 and
                 Cuckolds
                 are
                 the
                 same
                 ,
              
               
                 Witness
                 both
                 the
                 Conception
                 and
                 the
                 Name
                 .
              
               
                 Fie
                 ,
                 Lipsius
                 ,
                 Fie
                 ,
                 to
                 read
                 all
                 Virgil
                 o're
                 ,
              
               
                 And
                 not
                 perceive
                 whence
                 Cuckolds
                 came
                 before
                 .
              
            
          
        
         
           There
           is
           a
           Distemper
           among
           the
           Shepherds
           call'd
           Priapismus
           ,
           which
           if
           it
           meet
           with
           this
           
             Furor
             Vterinus
          
           ,
           will
           hold
           it
           pretty
           tack
           .
           It
           is
           a
           kind
           of
           Giant-like
           Distemper
           ,
           that
           lifts
           its
           head
           most
           stiffly
           against
           
             Furor
             Vterinus
          
           ,
           as
           having
           a
           perfect
           Animosity
           against
           it
           :
           If
           they
           happen
           to
           run-counter
           ,
           the
           Combat
           
           is
           fierce
           and
           endures
           long
           ,
           many
           times
           as
           long
           as
           either
           Shepherd
           or
           Shepherdess
           can
           crawl
           or
           breath
           ,
           but
           without
           any
           satisfaction
           of
           thei●
           Revenge
           .
           And
           therefore
           the
           best
           way
           is
           for
           them
           to
           let
           one
           another
           alone
           ;
           this
           
             Furor
             Vterinus
          
           is
           that
           which
           make
           the
           Poet
           Euripides
           cry
           out
           ,
           
             
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
               〈◊〉
            
             .
             
               Heavens
               bless
               us
               !
               how
               are
               Mortals
               
               Tennis-ball'd
               ,
            
             
               With
               this
               grand
               Mischief
               
                 Amorous
                 Fury
              
               call'd
               .
            
          
           This
           is
           that
           which
           distracts
           the
           whole
           Region
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           the
           
             Boule
             feau
          
           of
           domestick
           Discord
           and
           publick
           Havock
           .
           This
           is
           that
           which
           bankrupts
           the
           Gentry
           ,
           and
           hurries
           the
           poor
           Merchant
           and
           Tradesmen
           headlong
           into
           the
           Sanctuary
           of
           the
           Fleet
           and
           
           King
           's
           -
           Bench.
           
           The
           profusion
           of
           Habit
           ,
           the
           Prodigality
           of
           Diet
           ,
           the
           wast
           of
           Visits
           ,
           the
           Consumption
           of
           Entertainments
           .
           Thence
           Hippolitus
           in
           Euripides
           falls
           into
           such
           a
           high
           Passion
           that
           he
           Exclaims
           ,
           
             
               
                 
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                
                 ,
                 &c.
                 
              
            
             
               
                 O
                 Jupiter
                 !
                 what
                 cause
                 of
                 thy
                 so
                 cruel
                 Hate
                 ,
              
               
                 That
                 thou
                 didst
                 Women
                 thus
                 for
                 Man
                 create
                 ?
              
               
                 If
                 't
                 were
                 thy
                 Aim
                 to
                 propagate
                 Mankind
                 ,
              
               
                 The
                 Female
                 way
                 ought
                 not
                 t'
                 have
                 been
                 design'd
                 .
              
               
                 But
                 men
                 into
                 thy
                 Temples
                 should
                 have
                 brought
                 ,
              
               
                 Or
                 Brass
                 ,
                 or
                 Steel
                 ,
                 or
                 Gold
                 more
                 purely
                 wrought
                 ,
              
               
                 That
                 couldst
                 not
                 thou
                 have
                 chang'd
                 ,
                 and
                 then
                 might
                 we
              
               
               
                 Have
                 liv'd
                 in
                 Peace
                 from
                 Female
                 Fury
                 fr●e
                 .
              
            
          
        
         
           Some
           of
           the
           Effects
           of
           this
           
             Furor
             Vterinus
          
           happens
           to
           be
           as
           Comical
           as
           the
           other
           is
           Tragical
           ,
           while
           some
           poor
           Shepherds
           are
           found
           lock'd
           up
           in
           Trunks
           ,
           others
           whelmed
           under
           kneading-Troughs
           ,
           and
           there
           kept
           till
           their
           own
           Shepherdesses
           are
           sent
           for
           ,
           to
           receive
           the
           same
           kindnesses
           over
           their
           Backs
           ,
           which
           they
           had
           done
           to
           their
           Neighbours
           .
        
         
           There
           are
           also
           several
           Frenzies
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           the
           chiefest
           whereof
           is
           known
           by
           the
           name
           of
           
             being
             in
             Love
          
           ,
           so
           that
           you
           shall
           hardly
           read
           a
           Romance
           wherein
           the
           Prime
           Hero
           of
           all
           does
           not
           wast
           himself
           to
           Skin
           and
           Bones
           for
           the
           Love
           of
           some
           fair
           Shepherdess
           o●
           other
           ,
           what
           a
           deal
           of
           white
           Paper
           has
           
           been
           wasted
           ,
           to
           tell
           you
           in
           what
           sad
           Condition
           Demetrius
           was
           in
           ,
           how
           his
           Cheeks
           grew
           pale
           ,
           his
           Eyes
           grew
           hollow
           ,
           how
           he
           fell
           from
           his
           meat
           like
           a
           Hen
           troubled
           with
           the
           Pip
           ,
           what
           a
           Fever
           he
           had
           ,
           how
           he
           reviv'd
           at
           the
           sight
           of
           her
           ,
           and
           all
           for
           the
           Love
           of
           his
           Mother-in-Law
           :
           Nay
           ,
           and
           the
           old
           doting
           Shepherd
           his
           Father
           was
           forced
           to
           quit
           the
           pleasure
           of
           his
           old
           Age
           to
           save
           the
           young
           Fop
           his
           Son
           ,
           O
           most
           unparallel'd
           Success
           of
           a
           
           Betty-land-Frenzy
           !
           They
           that
           put
           Teresius
           upon
           Interrogatories
           whether
           he
           enjoy'd
           most
           satisfaction
           as
           a
           Man
           or
           a
           Woman
           ,
           might
           as
           well
           have
           put
           the
           question
           to
           this
           young
           Shepherdess
           ,
           which
           she
           lik't
           best
           ,
           the
           Father
           or
           the
           Son.
           Worse
           luck
           had
           Phaedra
           ,
           who
           was
           so
           mad
           as
           to
           hang
           herself
           for
           the
           Love
           of
           her
           Son-inLaw
           Hippolitus
           .
           Worse
           luck
           had
           Dido
           ,
           who
           was
           so
           mad
           as
           to
           
           burn
           herself
           .
           Worse
           luck
           had
           Eccho
           ,
           to
           kill
           her self
           ▪
           for
           the
           Love
           of
           Narcissus
           ,
           but
           a
           more
           conceited
           Fool
           was
           Narcissus
           to
           kill
           himself
           for
           Love
           of
           his
           own
           shadow
           .
        
         
           The
           same
           Frenzy
           possessed
           
             Thisbe
             ,
             Hero
          
           and
           Parthenia
           ,
           for
           the
           Loss
           of
           
             Pyramus
             ,
             Leander
          
           and
           Argalus
           ,
           there
           is
           scarce
           a
           Book
           in
           all
           Betty-land
           ,
           where
           some
           or
           other
           have
           not
           been
           forc't
           to
           quench
           the
           heat
           of
           their
           Frenzies
           ,
           even
           to
           the
           extinction
           of
           Life
           it self
           .
           If
           you
           ask
           the
           Cure
           ,
           I
           can
           tell
           you
           none
           ,
           bu●
           the
           Remedies
           already
           mentioned
           ,
           that
           is
           to
           say
           ,
           Ropes
           ,
           Rivers
           ,
           Fires
           and
           Precipices
           .
        
         
           Sterility
           and
           Frigidity
           are
           two
           great
           Distempers
           in
           Betty-land
           ,
           but
           they
           do
           more
           pester
           and
           trouble
           the
           Country
           than
           annoy
           it
           .
           Sterility
           
           causes
           great
           Murmuring
           ,
           and
           Frigidity
           causes
           great
           Heart-burning
           .
           And
           the
           sport
           is
           to
           hear
           them
           lay
           the
           fault
           one
           upon
           another
           ,
           there
           being
           few
           or
           none
           that
           are
           willing
           to
           confess
           where
           the
           fault
           lies
           .
           Away
           goes
           the
           Shepherdess
           to
           her
           Neighbors
           for
           Information
           ,
           you
           ,
           quoth
           she
           ,
           have
           all
           of
           ye
           such
           pretty
           little
           young
           Shepherds
           and
           Shepherdesses
           ,
           and
           I
           can
           have
           none
           ,
           which
           is
           the
           great●st
           Torment
           to
           me
           in
           the
           world
           ;
           upon
           this
           complaint
           ,
           many
           deep
           questions
           are
           put
           ,
           so
           freely
           answered
           ▪
           that
           there
           is
           not
           a
           Secret
           in
           Nature
           conceal'd
           .
           Many
           times
           there
           is
           a
           Writ
           of
           Enquiry
           in
           the
           case
           ,
           and
           all
           things
           are
           concluded
           to
           be
           safe
           and
           well
           :
           Then
           is
           the
           poor
           Shepherds
           Back
           agreed
           to
           be
           the
           weaker
           ,
           and
           yet
           the
           whole
           burthen
           and
           weight
           of
           miscarriage
           is
           laid
           upon
           it
           .
           It
           would
           tire
           Hercules
           
           himself
           to
           undergo
           the
           labor
           ,
           which
           he
           is
           now
           put
           upon
           ,
           however
           the
           better
           ▪
           to
           enable
           the
           poor
           Shepherd
           to
           dig
           and
           sow
           in
           his
           Parsly-Bed
           ,
           Physitians
           of
           all
           Sorts
           ,
           Ages
           and
           Sexes
           are
           consulted
           with
           ,
           certainly
           the
           most
           gainful
           and
           delightful
           part
           of
           their
           Practise
           ;
           to
           sit
           with
           an
           allow'd
           Familiarity
           by
           a
           Fair
           Shepherdess
           half
           unready
           in
           a
           morning
           ,
           passing
           away
           the
           time
           so
           pleasantly
           ,
           at
           the
           p●etty
           sport
           of
           Questions
           and
           Answers
           ,
           ●●moving
           ,
           so
           tickling
           ,
           that
           they
           would
           kindle
           a
           fire
           in
           the
           frozen
           Breast
           of
           a
           Hermite
           .
           They
           prescribe
           the
           Time
           ,
           the
           Preparation
           ,
           the
           Post●re
           ,
           Manner
           and
           Order
           of
           Action
           ,
           and
           must
           have
           an
           Account
           ,
           question
           by
           question
           ,
           whether
           every
           Lesson
           were
           punctually
           obs●rved
           .
           Then
           having
           received
           a
           large
           Reward
           ,
           you
           cannot
           imagin
           with
           what
           a
           solemn
           Countenance
           
           and
           merry
           Heart
           they
           take
           their
           leave
           ,
           for
           which
           they
           so
           cram
           ye
           with
           Electuaries
           of
           Diasatyrion
           and
           Diacorum
           ,
           so
           benoynt
           ye
           with
           Oyl
           of
           Euphorb
           .
           so
           feast
           you
           with
           candied
           Eringoes
           ,
           Pisstacho's
           ,
           pickled
           
             Periwinkles
             ,
             Cock-Iellies
          
           and
           sweet
           Wine
           ,
           that
           were
           not
           the
           poor
           Shepherds
           forced
           to
           empty
           as
           well
           as
           fill
           ,
           Heaven
           only
           knows
           to
           what
           a
           Strength
           and
           Fatness
           they
           would
           arrive
           .
           And
           truly
           they
           work
           strange
           Cures
           sometimes
           .
           Others
           there
           are
           ,
           that
           from
           Gun-Smiths
           ,
           Farryers
           and
           Coblers
           ,
           having
           got
           a
           few
           idle
           Receipts
           against
           Barrenness
           and
           Sterility
           ,
           get
           such
           a
           Fame
           in
           Betty-land
           presently
           ,
           that
           their
           Halls
           are
           crowded
           all
           the
           morning
           long
           with
           Nurses
           coming
           for
           half
           Crown-Glasses
           ,
           and
           for
           this
           they
           have
           a
           Poundage
           according
           to
           the
           Custom
           that
           they
           bring
           .
           Ask
           some
           of
           these
           great
           
           
           Paracelsus's
           why
           they
           add
           the
           Virtues
           of
           curing
           Sterility
           and
           Frigidity
           to
           a
           simple
           Pill
           which
           they
           know
           has
           no
           such
           Efficacy
           :
           O
           they
           cry
           !
           that
           's
           the
           Cummin-Loaf
           that
           takes
           with
           the
           Female
           Pidgeons
           ,
           but
           when
           all
           is
           done
           ,
           he
           gives
           the
           most
           pleasing
           Physick
           that
           whispers
           in
           a
           Shepherdesses
           Ears
           ,
           
             Change
             Vostre
             Vit
             Madam
          
           ,
           and
           who
           can
           dispute
           the
           Licence
           which
           a
           
             Delphian
             Oracle
          
           gives
           .
           But
           the
           grand
           Senior
           Disease
           of
           all
           that
           domineers
           and
           rages
           in
           every
           corner
           of
           Betty-land
           ,
           is
           a
           Distemper
           that
           has
           as
           many
           Names
           and
           Titles
           ,
           as
           the
           Great
           Turk
           himself
           ,
           his
           
             Praenomen
             is
             morbus
          
           ,
           his
           Cognomen's
           are
           like
           the
           Train
           of
           a
           Pleni-Potentiary
           Embassadors
           Coach
           ,
           
             Neapolitanus
             ,
             Hispanicus
             ,
             Gallicus
             ,
             Americanus
             ,
             Mexicanus
             ,
             Venereus
             ,
             Lues
             Venerea
             ,
             Gonorrhea
             simplex
             ,
             Gonorrhea
             Faetida
             ,
          
           in
           English
           the
           Pox.
           These
           3
           Capital
           
           Letters
           wast
           more
           Printers-Ink
           ,
           than
           all
           the
           whole
           Alphabet
           besides
           ;
           a
           man
           cannot
           draw
           to
           make
           water
           ,
           but
           they
           are
           always
           in
           his
           Eye
           bragging
           and
           vapouring
           what
           they
           can
           do
           if
           he
           have
           occasion
           .
           This
           Monsieur
           Pox
           ,
           and
           the
           Devil
           ,
           like
           your
           Serjeant
           and
           Yeomen
           ,
           upon
           the
           least
           Choler
           and
           Indignation
           are
           at
           every
           turn
           (
           by
           the
           Shepherds
           of
           Betty-land
           )
           bid
           to
           go
           take
           and
           apprehend
           whoever
           they
           be
           that
           offend
           them
           ,
           and
           they
           are
           two
           such
           nimble
           Pursivants
           ,
           that
           't
           is
           the
           general
           opinion
           that
           few
           or
           none
           escape
           one
           or
           t'
           other
           .
        
         
           Most
           faithful
           Shepherds
           ,
           't
           is
           not
           to
           be
           believ'd
           ,
           that
           this
           Distemper
           is
           of
           so
           modern
           an
           Extraction
           ,
           such
           an
           upstart
           destroyer
           of
           Mankind
           as
           it
           is
           generally
           taken
           to
           be
           ,
           for
           in
           the
           first
           place
           we
           read
           of
           
           
           Dejanira's
           Shirt
           ,
           which
           as
           the
           Fable
           tells
           ye
           she
           sent
           to
           Hercules
           ,
           which
           being
           set
           on
           fire
           by
           the
           heat
           of
           his
           Body
           ,
           burnt
           him
           to
           death
           .
           All
           which
           in
           verity
           was
           nothing
           but
           a
           most
           virulent
           Clap
           ,
           which
           that
           Confounded
           Whore
           gave
           the
           greatest
           Hero
           in
           the
           World
           in
           his
           old
           Age
           ,
           better
           had
           it
           been
           for
           Betty-land
           that
           that
           Strumpet
           had
           been
           burnt
           a
           hundred
           years
           before
           ,
           for
           the
           Example
           of
           that
           great
           Hero
           has
           so
           bewitcht
           the
           Hectors
           of
           our
           Age
           ,
           that
           they
           never
           think
           themselves
           like
           Hercules
           ,
           till
           they
           have
           been
           calcined
           in
           
           Dejanira's
           Smock
           .
           Aged
           Aeson
           was
           so
           improvident
           ,
           as
           to
           get
           a
           Clap
           in
           his
           old
           Age
           ,
           but
           his
           Daughter
           Medea
           so
           well
           sweat
           him
           in
           her
           
           Cornelius's
           Tub
           ,
           that
           she
           recovered
           him
           ,
           which
           gave
           an
           occasion
           to
           the
           Poets
           to
           feign
           ,
           that
           she
           boyl'd
           him
           so
           long
           till
           she
           renewed
           hi
           
           Age.
           And
           
             Valerius
             Maximus
          
           tells
           you
           a
           Story
           of
           young
           
             Clodius
             Pulcher
          
           ,
           who
           being
           a
           dissolute
           young
           Shepherd
           ,
           and
           wholly
           dedicating
           himself
           to
           the
           Embraces
           of
           a
           Common
           and
           Infamous
           Syren
           :
           
             Erubescendo
             mortis
             genere
             Consumptus
             fuit
          
           ,
           dy'd
           a
           Death
           which
           was
           a
           shame
           to
           rehearse
           ,
           for
           saith
           he
           ,
           
             Abdomine
             avide
             devorato
             saede
             &
             sordide
             Intemperantiae
             spiritum
             reddidit
             .
          
           The
           lower
           parts
           of
           his
           Belly
           being
           all
           eaten
           away
           ,
           he
           yielded
           his
           Life
           to
           the
           conquest
           of
           most
           nasty
           and
           sordid
           Intemperance
           .
        
         
           The
           fury
           of
           t●is
           Distemper
           is
           antiently
           set
           forth
           by
           the
           Greek
           Poet
           Nicander
           in
           his
           Alexiphar●aca
           ,
           w●o
           lived
           in
           the
           time
           of
           
           Attalus
           the
           last
           King
           of
           Pergamus
           ,
           
             
               
                 
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                
                 ,
              
               
                 
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                
              
               
                 
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                   〈◊〉
                
                 .
              
            
             
               
                 For
                 if
                 the
                 vigour
                 of
                 Meclean
                 Fury
                 but
                 once
              
               
                 Begins
                 to
                 parch
                 the
                 Marrow
                 of
                 the
                 Bones
                 ,
              
               
                 Wo
                 worth
                 the
                 Man
                 that
                 finds
                 not
                 Surgeon
                 out
              
               
                 And
                 if
                 he
                 scapes
                 the
                 first
                 ,
                 takes
                 to'ther
                 bout
                 ,
              
               
                 When
                 wasted
                 with
                 inexorable
                 Pains
                 ,
              
               
               
                 He
                 moans
                 the
                 Anguish
                 spread
                 through
                 all
                 his
                 Veins
                 :
              
               
                 Oh
                 cruel
                 Pleasure
                 that
                 we
                 buy
                 so
                 dear
                 ,
              
               
                 For
                 one
                 hours
                 sport
                 to
                 plague
                 a
                 Man
                 a
                 year
                 .
              
            
          
        
         
           Surely
           ,
           said
           Eucolpius
           ,
           to
           pass
           through
           the
           several
           Hospitals
           ,
           where
           the
           Cures
           of
           this
           Distemper
           are
           perform'd
           ,
           is
           a
           Journey
           more
           pleasant
           than
           that
           of
           Aeneas
           into
           Hell
           ,
           to
           see
           a
           poor
           Shepherd
           with
           his
           Head
           and
           Chops
           mu●●led
           up
           like
           Bevis
           of
           Southampton
           in
           his
           Helmet
           ,
           lay'd
           all
           along
           upon
           the
           side
           of
           his
           Couch
           ,
           like
           the
           Statue
           of
           Thamesis
           pouring
           out
           a
           River
           from
           the
           Urn
           of
           his
           Mouth
           .
           To
           hear
           the
           strange
           Noises
           and
           hollow
           Sounds
           ,
           that
           others
           make
           having
           
           lost
           the
           O●gans
           of
           Speech
           ,
           how
           they
           curse
           and
           ban
           the
           Artist
           for
           not
           having
           made
           their
           new
           Noses
           according
           to
           Directions
           ,
           for
           having
           made
           a
           new
           Pallat
           more
           like
           the
           Roof
           of
           an
           Oven
           than
           to
           be
           put
           into
           the
           Mouth
           of
           a
           Gentleman
           .
           Go
           a
           little
           further
           and
           you
           shall
           hear
           another
           ●uming
           against
           the
           cause
           of
           his
           Misfortune
           ,
           a
           plague
           of
           all
           Religious
           Syrens
           —
           had
           she
           not
           told
           me
           ,
           she
           had
           been
           one
           of
           
           Baxter's
           H●arers
           ,
           she
           should
           have
           been
           damn'd
           ere
           I
           wou'd
           have
           medled
           with
           her
           .
           How
           I
           came
           by
           this
           sad
           Accident
           ,
           cry's
           another
           ,
           Heav'n
           knows
           !
           for
           I
           have
           not
           laid
           with
           any
           but
           my
           own
           Sh●pherdess
           this
           half
           year
           ,
           but
           he
           is
           soon
           taken
           up
           short
           by
           his
           fellow
           in
           Affliction
           —
           Hell
           take
           your
           Shepherdess
           for
           me
           ,
           for
           I
           had
           to
           do
           with
           her
           
           but
           a
           week
           since
           and
           she
           gave
           me
           this
           .
           A
           huge
           mountainous
           Shepherd
           ,
           Grave
           and
           Elderly
           ,
           had
           been
           claw'd
           off
           by
           a
           little
           diminutive
           Pigmy
           ,
           and
           he
           sate
           in
           his
           Indian-Gown
           ,
           with
           a
           blew
           Satin-Cap
           ,
           Laced
           and
           Bordered
           with
           a
           Rich
           Point
           ,
           comforting
           himself
           up
           with
           
           Hall's
           
             Meditations
             ,
             Shakespear
          
           ,
           and
           
           Foxe's
           
             Book
             of
             Martyrs
          
           ,
           and
           giving
           wholsom
           Advice
           to
           all
           that
           came
           to
           s●e
           him
           .
           O
           my
           dear
           Friends
           and
           Companions
           !
           quoth
           he
           ,
           have
           a
           care
           of
           Syrens
           ,
           little
           approaching
           to
           a
           door
           fast
           lockt
           ye
           might
           discover
           through
           the
           Key-hole
           ,
           a
           poor
           Shepherdess
           disconsolately
           creeping
           about
           the
           Room
           ,
           lamenting
           and
           sighing
           to
           her self
           ,
           and
           at
           length
           he●ving
           a
           Glass
           of
           Liquor
           to
           her
           Mouth
           ,
           which
           went
           down
           with
           so
           many
           sour
           Faces
           and
           with
           so
           much
           
           reluctancy
           ,
           that
           it
           seem'd
           to
           be
           neither
           Hippocras
           nor
           burnt-Claret
           .
           Are
           these
           the
           sweets
           of
           Love
           ,
           quoth
           she
           ?
           The
           Pleasures
           of
           my
           Youth
           have
           sowr
           Sawce
           ,
           for
           I
           am
           undone
           and
           never
           shall
           be
           my
           own
           Woman
           again
           .
           But
           the
           old
           Nurse
           that
           was
           with
           her
           ,
           cry'd
           ,
           Have
           patience
           and
           all
           will
           be
           well
           in
           due
           time
           ,
           '
           ●was
           his
           Ignorance
           ,
           and
           you
           must
           pardon
           one
           another
           .
           Pardon
           me
           ,
           quoth
           the
           other
           ,
           what
           am
           I
           guilty
           of
           ?
           Alas
           !
           I
           beg'd
           as
           for
           an
           Alms
           to
           tell
           me
           the
           truth
           ,
           and
           he
           still
           cry'd
           ,
           it
           was
           a
           Strein
           ,
           that
           he
           got
           it
           at
           playing
           at
           Leap-frog
           ,
           I
           pityed
           him
           ,
           I
           nursed
           him
           ,
           and
           plaistered
           him
           ,
           till
           it
           was
           come
           to
           that
           I
           could
           almost
           look
           in
           at
           his
           Mouth
           quite
           through
           the
           nape
           of
           his
           Neck
           ,
           then
           too
           late
           I
           discovered
           my
           Error
           and
           his
           Untruth
           .
           The
           
           Distemper
           is
           so
           general
           ,
           that
           a
           Man
           cannot
           shrink
           up
           his
           Nose
           in
           any
           Company
           ,
           for
           the
           shooting
           of
           a
           Corn
           against
           wet
           weather
           ,
           but
           they
           ask
           ye
           —
           what
           h●
           ,
           you
           have
           got
           '
           em
           .
           Now
           as
           there
           are
           many
           Philosophers
           that
           have
           largely
           treated
           of
           Valour
           and
           Fortitude
           ,
           many
           that
           have
           made
           Essays
           upon
           Patience
           ,
           but
           none
           of
           these
           make
           any
           mention
           of
           those
           that
           so
           boldly
           and
           magnanimously
           Adventure
           Life
           and
           Limbs
           in
           the
           Combates
           of
           Venus
           .
           He
           that
           looses
           a
           Limb
           in
           Battle
           reaps
           Honor
           ,
           and
           Scars
           beget
           ▪
           Renown
           .
           But
           let
           a
           Venerial
           Furioso
           with
           a
           Colly-Flower
           upon
           his
           Forehead
           Encounter
           Bacchus
           himself
           never
           so
           briskly
           ,
           his
           Nose
           which
           by
           this
           means
           he
           is
           for●'t
           to
           purchase
           of
           pure
           Gold
           is
           not
           so
           much
           esteemed
           as
           the
           others
           
           wooden
           Leg
           ,
           no
           man
           calls
           them
           
           Hero's
           but
           Fools
           .
           And
           therefore
           Heroules
           is
           not
           brought
           in
           mad
           by
           the
           Poets
           ▪
           for
           having
           the
           Disease
           ,
           but
           because
           he
           was
           such
           a●
           Fool
           to
           get
           it
           ,
           't
           was
           a
           swinger
           ,
           and
           he
           dy'd
           on
           't
           .
           But
           b●cause
           Hercules
           the
           Hector
           of
           the
           World
           dy'd
           on
           't
           ,
           that
           's
           no
           Argument
           that
           the
           Hectors
           of
           Bet●y-land
           should
           run
           such
           terrible
           R●●qu●s
           for
           the
           fag
           end
           of
           Hercules
           his
           Fame
           .
           Therefore
           Nessus
           the
           Centaur
           ,
           who
           gave
           Dejanira
           her
           Doze
           ,
           gave
           the
           better
           Advice
           ,
           who
           being
           sl●in
           by
           Hercules
           for
           vitiating
           his
           Mistress
           upon
           his
           death-bed
           left
           Dejanira
           this
           Legacy
           .
           Give
           ,
           quoth
           he
           ,
           the
           same
           Clap
           to
           Hercules
           that
           I
           have
           given
           you
           ,
           and
           I
           'le
           secure
           you
           ,
           he
           shall
           never
           love
           Syrens
           more
           .
           The
           effect
           of
           which
           Counsel
           was
           good
           ,
           and
           
           doubtless
           to
           be
           followed
           rather
           than
           the
           Example
           of
           Hercules
           ,
           most
           fit
           for
           those
           that
           accidentally
           commit
           an
           Error
           to
           take
           warning
           by
           in
           time
           .
           But
           they
           that
           try
           the
           Experiments
           for
           the
           Experiments
           sake
           ,
           deserves
           no
           better
           end
           than
           Hercules
           had
           ;
           but
           what
           Remedies
           ?
           Remedies
           !
           more
           than
           there
           are
           Atoms
           playing
           in
           the
           Summer-Sun-Beams
           .
        
         
           A
           Distemper
           that
           opposes
           the
           Generation
           of
           Man
           ,
           to
           set
           up
           and
           advance
           its
           own
           generative
           faculty
           .
        
         
           For
           it
           has
           produc't
           and
           daily
           procreates
           such
           multitudes
           of
           Vermine
           and
           strange
           Monsters
           ,
           that
           the
           sultry
           Bogs
           of
           Africa
           never
           produc'd
           the
           like
           .
           
             French
             Quacks
             ,
             Italian
             Mountebanks
             ,
             German
             Operators
             ,
             English
             Empericks
             ,
             Experienc't
             Hunters
             ,
             Vniversal
             Pillmakers
             ,
             Paracelsians
             ,
             Chimists
             ,
             
             Hermetical
             Astrologers
             ,
             Compounders
             ,
             Confounders
             ,
             Projectors
             ,
             Dissectors
             ,
             Injectors
             .
          
           These
           made
           such
           an
           Alarm
           in
           the
           world
           ,
           that
           the
           
             Curats
             ,
             Parish-Clerks
          
           ,
           and
           Sextons
           ,
           nay
           the
           whole
           
             Prerogative
             Office
          
           was
           in
           an
           up-roar
           ,
           and
           all
           joyning
           together
           ,
           drew
           up
           a
           Remonstrance
           ,
           which
           they
           presented
           to
           Death
           .
           One
           of
           the
           Curates
           in
           a
           formal
           set-Speech
           ,
           inform'd
           his
           meagre
           Majesty
           of
           the
           danger
           he
           was
           in
           ,
           how
           many
           new
           Pills
           ,
           Potions
           ,
           Waters
           ,
           Elixirs
           ,
           Spirits
           of
           Salt
           ,
           Lozinges
           ,
           and
           Chimical
           Extractions
           these
           Enemies
           of
           his
           had
           invented
           to
           his
           Destruction
           .
           To
           commiserate
           the
           Ruin
           of
           so
           many
           Families
           that
           liv'd
           by
           Dust
           to
           Dust
           ,
           Grave-digging
           ,
           Bell-tolling
           ,
           Chancel-ground
           ,
           middle-Isle-ground
           ,
           and
           Belfry-ground
           .
           To
           pitty
           the
           decay
           of
           
           the
           Civil-Law
           ,
           should
           they
           lose
           the
           Probat
           of
           Wills
           :
           On
           the
           other
           side
           ,
           the
           people
           of
           Betty-land
           finding
           that
           they
           were
           now
           to
           be
           immortal
           ,
           fell
           to
           all
           manner
           of
           Debauchery
           ,
           Gluttonizing
           ,
           Drinking
           ,
           Whoring
           ,
           to
           the
           height
           of
           all
           Excess
           ,
           laying
           all
           care
           of
           Health
           aside
           ,
           as
           altogether
           needless
           and
           frivolous
           ,
           encountring
           Claps
           and
           Pox
           with
           that
           boldness
           ,
           as
           if
           they
           had
           done
           it
           in
           defiance
           of
           Death
           ,
           making
           Lampoons
           against
           that
           poor
           .
           Miscreant
           ,
           as
           if
           he
           had
           not
           been
           worthy
           to
           wipe
           their
           Shooes
           .
           As
           for
           Old
           Time
           with
           his
           Scyth
           ,
           they
           bid
           him
           go
           to
           Harvest-work
           ,
           and
           labor
           hard
           in
           the
           Summer
           ,
           lest
           he
           is
           starved
           in
           the
           Winter
           ;
           some
           ask●
           him
           why
           he
           did
           not
           make
           friends
           to
           get
           into
           the
           Charterhouse
           .
        
         
           Death
           and
           Time
           too
           were
           
           not
           a
           little
           troubled
           to
           hear
           these
           things
           ,
           and
           therefore
           to
           understand
           the
           truth
           of
           their
           Practices
           ,
           they
           resolved
           to
           take
           a
           turn
           or
           two
           about
           the
           Town
           .
           The
           main
           Obstacle
           was
           to
           get
           into
           Moorfields
           ,
           where
           the
           chief
           heads
           of
           the
           Rebellion
           liv'd
           ,
           for
           fear
           of
           the
           Prentices
           .
           But
           time
           being
           the
           master
           of
           Opportunity
           ,
           bid
           him
           leave
           that
           to
           his
           Care
           :
           so
           coming
           into
           the
           Street
           ,
           they
           beheld
           to
           their
           no
           small
           Astonishment
           ,
           all
           the
           Posts
           ,
           all
           the
           dead
           Walls
           ,
           all
           the
           Posterns
           ,
           all
           the
           Arches
           so
           be-plaistered
           ,
           so
           be-smear'd
           with
           Bills
           and
           
           printed
           Papers
           bidding
           open
           defiance
           against
           them
           ,
           as
           if
           the
           Bricks
           and
           Stone
           would
           sink
           under
           their
           several
           burthens
           with
           the
           Support
           and
           Enablement
           of
           these
           potent
           Sear-Cloths
           .
           By
           and
           by
           comes
           a
           Fellow
           with
           a
           Brush
           and
           pot
           of
           Past
           ,
           and
           his
           Arms
           full
           of
           Quarto's
           ,
           and
           giving
           Death
           such
           a
           shoulder
           ,
           as
           had
           almost
           thrown
           him
           into
           the
           Kennel
           ,
           claps
           up
           another
           brisk
           Challenge
           i'
           th
           very
           teeth
           of
           him
           ;
           Death
           let
           him
           go
           as
           he
           came
           ,
           for
           he
           did
           not
           like
           his
           Company
           ,
           and
           when
           he
           was
           gone
           fell
           to
           Reading
           .
           In
           the
           first
           
           place
           ,
           No
           Cure
           no
           Mony
           ,
           Cheek
           by
           Jowl
           by
           that
           stood
           ,
           At
           the
           Gun
           in
           Moorfields
           liveth
           one
           that
           never
           fails
           .
           Much
           ado
           had
           Time
           to
           keep
           Death
           from
           striking
           his
           Dart
           into
           his
           own
           Breast
           ,
           at
           the
           sight
           of
           th●se
           two
           confident
           pi●ces
           of
           Mortality
           .
           But
           when
           he
           lift
           up
           his
           Eyes
           ,
           and
           spy'd
           the
           
             Three
             Infallible
             Cures
             .
             Dii
          
           and
           Pluto
           guard
           me
           ,
           quoth
           
             Death
             ,
             Three
             Infallible
             Cures
          
           ,
           Then
           wo
           is
           me
           poor
           Death
           !
           I
           never
           knew
           my self
           till
           now
           ,
           a
           whole
           Crown
           for
           one
           quarter
           of
           Brandy
           ,
           for
           these
           bold
           Mortals
           have
           almost
           broke
           my
           Heart
           .
           But
           
           time
           the
           subtler
           of
           the
           two
           ,
           gave
           him
           kind
           words
           of
           Comfort
           ,
           assuring
           him
           that
           he
           doubted
           not
           but
           in
           a
           short
           time
           to
           let
           these
           Boasters
           find
           how
           vainly
           they
           contested
           with
           so
           great
           a
           Prince
           as
           he
           was
           .
           But
           as
           publick
           as
           they
           are
           abroad
           ,
           they
           pr●t●nd
           the
           greatest
           Secrecy
           imagi●able
           at
           their
           own
           Habitations
           .
           For
           the
           People
           of
           Betty-land
           whatever
           Revel-Rout
           they
           make
           when
           they
           get
           this
           Distemper
           ,
           yet
           when
           they
           find
           themselves
           tainted
           ,
           are
           the
           most
           cautious
           that
           can
           be
           to
           let
           thei●
           Friends
           ,
           Relations
           ,
           or
           Acquaintance
           know
           it
           .
           
           They
           sneak
           into
           the
           Habitations
           of
           the
           Syrens
           with
           their
           Cloaks
           over
           their
           No●es
           ,
           pop
           out
           again
           when
           t●ey
           see
           t●e
           Street
           clear
           ,
           but
           within
           doors
           are
           ashamed
           of
           no
           Extravagance
           ,
           for
           pleasure
           is
           a
           kind
           of
           drunkenness
           that
           makes
           men
           mad
           ,
           puts
           all
           the
           Senses
           and
           Pastions
           upon
           the
           stretch
           of
           duty
           ,
           and
           when
           the
           heat
           is
           over
           ,
           lays
           them
           tyr'd
           and
           ●anguid
           to
           sleep
           ,
           leaving
           none
           but
           the
           usual
           Centinels
           upon
           the
           Guard
           ,
           Suspicion
           ,
           Fear
           ,
           and
           Repentance
           .
        
         
           FINIS
           .
        
      
    
     
       
         
         
           Books
           Printed
           for
           and
           Sold
           by
           Thomas
           Fox
           at
           the
           White-Hart
           ●ver
           against
           St.
           Dunstans-Church
           in
           Fleet-Street
           ,
           and
           at
           the
           Angel
           in
           Westminster-Hall
           .
        
         
           THe
           History
           of
           the
           
             Grecian
             War
          
           ,
           by
           Th●y●dides
           ,
           and
           Englisht
           by
           Mr.
           Hobbs
           of
           
             Malmsbury
             ,
             Folio
          
           .
        
         
           The
           History
           of
           the
           
             Life
             ,
             Reign
          
           and
           Death
           of
           
             Edward
             2d
          
           .
           King
           of
           England
           ,
           &
           Lord
           of
           Ireland
           with
           therise
           and
           fall
           of
           his
           great
           Favorits
           Gaveston
           and
           the
           
             Spencers
             ,
             Fol.
          
           
        
         
           
             Cowels
             Interpreter
          
           a
           new
           Law
           Dictionary
           ,
           fol.
           
        
         
           Daltons
           
             Office
             of
             Sheri●●s
          
           ,
           fol.
           
        
         
           Daltons
           
             Country
             Justice
          
           ,
           Folio
           .
        
         
           Boccaces
           Tales
           ,
           folio
           .
        
         
           The
           Tryal
           and
           Condemnation
           of
           
             Stephen
             College
          
           at
           Oxford
           for
           High-Treason
           ,
           with
           his
           last
           Speech
           at
           the
           place
           of
           Execution
           
             f●
             sti●●ht
          
           .
        
         
         
           The
           Papers
           and
           Speeches
           of
           the
           late
           Lord
           Russel
           ,
           Cap.
           
             Walcot
             ,
             Iohn
             Rowse
          
           and
           
             Will.
             Hone
          
           at
           the
           place
           of
           Execution
           ,
           
             fol.
             stitcht
          
           .
        
         
           An
           Examination
           of
           the
           state
           of
           the
           Case
           of
           the
           Earl
           of
           
             Danby
             ,
             ●
          
           .
        
         
           An
           Account
           of
           the
           state
           of
           his
           Majesties
           Revenue
           ,
           as
           it
           was
           left
           by
           the
           Earl
           of
           Danby
           at
           Lady-day
           ,
           1679.
           in
           a
           Letter
           to
           a
           friend
           occasion'd
           by
           his
           Lordships
           answer
           to
           an
           Examination
           of
           the
           state
           of
           the
           Case
           of
           the
           Earl
           of
           Danby
           ,
           by
           the
           Honourable
           Sr.
           
             Robert
             Howard
             ,
             ●ol
             .
             stitcht
             .
          
        
         
           The
           Examination
           of
           
             Edward
             Fits-harris
          
           Esq
           taken
           before
           Sr.
           
             Robert
             Cla●ton
          
           ,
           and
           Sr.
           
             Geo.
             Treby
          
           ,
           publish'd
           by
           the
           order
           of
           the
           House
           of
           Commons
           ,
           
             fol.
             stitcht
          
           .
        
         
           A
           true
           Account
           of
           the
           whole
           proceedings
           betwixt
           his
           Grace
           the
           Duke
           of
           Ormond
           and
           the
           Right
           Honourable
           Arthur
           Earl
           of
           Anglesey
           late
           Lord
           Privy-Seal
           ,
           before
           
           the
           King
           and
           Councel
           ,
           and
           the
           said
           Earls
           Letter
           of
           the
           2d
           .
           of
           August
           to
           his
           Majesty
           on
           that
           occasion
           .
           With
           a
           Letter
           of
           the
           now
           Lord
           Bishop
           of
           Winchester
           to
           the
           said
           Earl
           of
           the
           means
           to
           keep
           out
           Popery
           ,
           and
           the
           only
           effectual
           expedient
           to
           hinder
           the
           growth
           thereof
           ,
           and
           to
           secure
           both
           the
           Church
           of
           England
           ,
           and
           the
           Presbyterian
           Party
           ,
           
             f.
             st
          
           .
        
         
           A
           seasonable
           Address
           to
           both
           Hous●s
           of
           Parliament
           concerning
           the
           Succession
           ,
           the
           fears
           of
           Popery
           and
           Arbitrary
           Government
           ,
           by
           a
           true
           Protestant
           and
           hearty
           lover
           of
           his
           Country
           ,
           
             quar
             .
             stitcht
          
           .
        
         
           The
           Bishop
           of
           Herefords
           Legacy
           to
           his
           Diocess
           ,
           being
           Sermons
           against
           Popery
           and
           a
           Treatise
           on
           the
           Sacrament
           ;
           quart
           .
        
         
           Mr
           Whitehals
           Answer
           to
           Mr.
           
           Hobbs's
           Civil
           Wars
           of
           
             England
             ,
             Octavo
          
           .
        
         
           
             Cottoni
             Posthuma
          
           ,
           or
           divers
           choice
           pieces
           of
           that
           Renowned
           Antiquary
           ▪
           
           Sr.
           
             Robert
             Cotton
          
           Bar.
           Oct.
           
        
         
           Romes
           Tradition
           ,
           the
           Law
           and
           Gospels
           Destruction
           ,
           being
           a
           sober
           defence
           of
           the
           Church
           of
           England
           from
           the
           Faction
           of
           the
           Romanists
           :
           with
           short
           historical
           Observations
           on
           the
           Actions
           and
           Policies
           of
           the
           Popes
           of
           Rome
           in
           2
           parts
           ,
           by
           
             Geo.
             Topham
          
           Rector
           of
           Baston
           and
           Prebendary
           of
           
             Lincoln
             ,
             Oct.
          
           
        
         
           Grammatical
           Drollery
           by
           Captain
           
             Hicks
             ,
             Octav.
          
           
        
         
           
           Hobbs's
           Tripos
           in
           3
           Discourses
           .
           The
           first
           ,
           Human
           Nature
           ,
           or
           the
           fundamental
           Elements
           of
           Policy
           .
           The
           second
           
             de
             Corpore
             politico
          
           ,
           or
           the
           Elements
           of
           Law
           moral
           and
           politick
           :
           as
           of
           the
           Law
           of
           Nature
           ,
           Oaths
           ,
           Covenants
           ,
           several
           kinds
           of
           Go-vernment
           with
           the
           changes
           and
           Revolu●ions
           of
           them
           .
           The
           third
           of
           Liberty
           and
           Necessity
           ,
           wherein
           all
           Controversie
           concerning
           
           Predestination
           ,
           Election
           ,
           Free-Will
           ,
           Grace
           ,
           Merits
           ,
           Reprobation
           is
           fully
           decided
           and
           clear'd
           the
           3
           Edition
           ,
           by
           
             Tho.
             Hobbs
          
           of
           
             Malmsbury
             ,
             Octavo
          
           .
        
         
           Mr.
           Hunts
           Argument
           for
           the
           Bishops
           Right
           of
           judging
           in
           capital
           Cases
           in
           Parliament
           ,
           Oct.
           
        
         
           The
           Lord
           
           Hollis's
           Remains
           ,
           being
           a
           second
           Letter
           to
           a
           friend
           concerning
           the
           Judicature
           of
           the
           Bishops
           in
           Parliament
           in
           Vindication
           of
           what
           he
           wrote
           in
           his
           first
           ,
           and
           in
           answer
           to
           a
           Book
           Entituled
           
             The
             Rights
             of
             the
             Bishops
             to
             judge
             in
             Capital
             Cases
             of
             Parliament
             clear'd
             ,
          
           and
           also
           to
           the
           Grand
           Question
           ,
           &c.
           
           To
           which
           is
           added
           Considerations
           in
           answer
           to
           the
           learned
           Author
           of
           the
           Grand
           Question
           ,
           &c.
           by
           another
           hand
           :
           and
           reflections
           upon
           some
           passages
           in
           Mr.
           Hunts
           Argument
           upon
           that
           Subject
           ,
           by
           a
           third
           ,
           Oct.
           
        
         
         
           An
           answer
           to
           
             Dolman
             alias
             Parsons
          
           upon
           the
           Succession
           ,
           written
           by
           S.
           
             Iohn
             Hayward
          
           Knight
           ,
           and
           Dr.
           of
           Laws
           ,
           Octav.
           
        
         
           The
           Ramble
           ,
           an
           Anti-Heroick
           Poem
           ,
           together
           with
           some
           Terrestrial
           Hymns
           and
           carnal
           Ejaculations
           by
           
             Alexander
             Ratcliff
          
           of
           Grayes-Inn
           Esq.
           Octav.
           
        
         
           Europe
           a
           slave
           ,
           unless
           England
           break
           her
           Chains
           ,
           discovering
           the
           grand
           Designs
           of
           the
           French
           popish
           Party
           in
           England
           for
           several
           years
           .
           The
           2d
           .
           Edition
           ,
           Twelves
           .
        
         
           The
           
             Roman
             Historian
          
           ;
           or
           compendious
           History
           of
           the
           Lives
           ,
           signal
           Enterprizes
           and
           Deaths
           of
           all
           the
           Roman
           Emperors
           from
           
             Iulius
             Caesar
          
           to
           Leopold
           the
           first
           now
           Reigning
           ,
           together
           with
           an
           exact
           Succession
           of
           all
           the
           Popes
           to
           this
           present
           time
           ,
           Illustrated
           with
           the
           Sculptures
           of
           the
           Caesars
           in
           Copper-Plates
           ,
           and
           Englisht
           from
           the
           Original
           Italian
           ,
           
           by
           a
           Person
           of
           Quality
           in
           Twelves
           .
        
         
           
             French
             Intreagues
          
           ,
           or
           the
           History
           of
           their
           delusory
           Promises
           since
           the
           Pirenaean
           Treaty
           ,
           written
           in
           French
           at
           Cologne
           ,
           and
           now
           made
           English
           ,
           Twelves
           .
        
         
           Sr.
           Walter
           Rawley's
           Remains
           ,
           Twel
           .