Pyrgomachia; vel potius, Pygomachia Or, in cleane English, The castle-combat. Performed; by Iames Fencer, and William Wrastler. At nine of the clock of the night of the ninth day of the ninth moneth of the ninth yeare of the reigne of our Soveraigne Lord King Charles. Recorded by the ninth of the nine Muses, in the ninth part of nine weekes: and devided into nine files. Gower, John, Master of Arts. 1635 Approx. 56 KB of XML-encoded text transcribed from 26 1-bit group-IV TIFF page images. Text Creation Partnership, Ann Arbor, MI ; Oxford (UK) : 2008-09 (EEBO-TCP Phase 1). A01996 STC 12141 ESTC S103358 99839114 99839114 3513 This keyboarded and encoded edition of the work described above is co-owned by the institutions providing financial support to the Early English Books Online Text Creation Partnership. This Phase I text is available for reuse, according to the terms of Creative Commons 0 1.0 Universal . The text can be copied, modified, distributed and performed, even for commercial purposes, all without asking permission. Early English books online. (EEBO-TCP ; phase 1, no. A01996) Transcribed from: (Early English Books Online ; image set 3513) Images scanned from microfilm: (Early English books, 1475-1640 ; 1205:02) Pyrgomachia; vel potius, Pygomachia Or, in cleane English, The castle-combat. Performed; by Iames Fencer, and William Wrastler. At nine of the clock of the night of the ninth day of the ninth moneth of the ninth yeare of the reigne of our Soveraigne Lord King Charles. Recorded by the ninth of the nine Muses, in the ninth part of nine weekes: and devided into nine files. Gower, John, Master of Arts. [48] p. Printed [by Augustine Mathewes] for Robert Milbourne, London : 1635. In verse. Signed on E4v: Iohannes Gower. The words "Iames .. Wrastler" are bracketed together on the title page. Printer's name from STC. Signatures: A-F⁴. Running title reads: The castle-combat. 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Keying and markup guidelines are available at the Text Creation Partnership web site . eng Great Britain -- Politics and government -- Charles I, 1625-1649. 2007-09 TCP Assigned for keying and markup 2007-11 Aptara Keyed and coded from ProQuest page images 2008-01 Elspeth Healey Sampled and proofread 2008-01 Elspeth Healey Text and markup reviewed and edited 2008-02 pfs Batch review (QC) and XML conversion PYRGOMACHIA ; Vel potius , PYGOMACHIA . OR , In cleane English , THE CASTLE-COMBAT . Performed ; by IAMES FENCER , and WILLIAM WRASTLER . At nine of the clock of the night of the ninth day of the ninth moneth of the ninth yeare of the reigne of our Soveraigne Lord King CHARLES . Recorded By the ninth of the mine Muses , in the ninth part of nine Weekes : and devided into nine Files . LONDON , Printed for ROBERT MILBOVRNE . 1635. The Combat is thus ranged into Files , or Orders . File 1. The Place , and Climate . 2. The Quarrell , and Vapour . 3. The Challenge , and Resolution . 4. The Field , and March. 5. The Search , and Sadnesse . 6. The Encounter , and Weapon . 7. The Parly , and Parting . 8. The Retreat , and Triumph . 9. The Reward , and Honour . THE CASTLE-COMBAT . PROLOGVS . MY Muse the fights of puling Gnats , The strifes of leather-winged Batts , The Duells twixt the Weazells and the Rats Rejecteth : Shee mounts on Pegasaean wings , And , streining up her vocall strings , To sing of Worthies , not of Chitter lings , Affecteth . With any slight Pygmaean Elfe , Or such poore base aejected pelfe Shee scornes below to creepe , and crawles , her selfe Bemudding ; But chaunts of Champions Grandiside , As tall , as bigg , as long , as wide , Whose stomacks are as piping hot , being tri'd , As Pudding . Assist yee Heliconian Traine , Powre out your liquors on my braine : That I may utter from a flowing veine Sad dangers . Helpe Phoebus . One's a friend of thine . For hee sells a Aganippine Wine , And hangs a soaring b Bird out for a Signe To strangers . FILE I. The Place , and Climate . IT much behoves ( as Sages tell ) To know where great , or wise men dwell , And where their Virtues , and exployts befell . Renowned . Among the c Saxons of the East , There hath been many a Nobles nest , And Roman Garrisons of yore did rest Entowned : Who there did fixe their foot so long , They left some spawne of courage strong : Which , being spread the Natives all among , Is fruitfull . Hence is it , that so many are Or fighters in the Forts of warr , Or with their Neighbours strive in Courts of jarr , Still suitfull . Within this Climate , on that ground , Where Hop-crop hopes are ( mostly ) sound , A village stands , which fresh-sprūg a Coln doth bound , And border . T was bravely govern'd , while by it Great b Oxford in his tow'r did sit . Alas ! now c Constable-Church warden wit Keeps order . It had of old a Market day , Untill the Charter crept away : Yet love by tale is daily sold ( they say ) By many . They follow busie legall strife : And yet Profession is their life , And in good works ( for sooth ) they are as rife , As any . For who , but they , could plot so well Foure superstitious d Bells to sell ? One left doth ring a solitary knell . I' th Steeple . The Chancell hath a School-house bin , Where boyes have shown their penall skin , The sniv'ling Clark doth line * by line begin To 'th people . The greater part are deft precise I' th nose , and lips , and eares , and eyes , And in conceit , & language wondrous wise : Yea truely . Some others , on the other hand , Are of the rash-swash-fellowes band , And may be well proclaim'd , if duely scan'd , Vnruly . Not that it is wild wanton wast Of wine , to take a short repast . A modest Muse sometime may sipp a tast Of Claret . But helter skelter drawing deepe Till reason winke , and play bo peepe , Till roaring rage rude revel-rout do keepe : O barr it . On both hands here ( & where , where not ? ) Are seene some faults . 'T is humane lot . My pens black sope in scouring thē may blot A little . The Towne is view'd . You aske the name I call it onely Heningam . For now what needs prefixing to the same The title ? FILE II. The Quarrell and Vapour . HEere valiant Iames with Billy met : At juice of Bacchus both were set , Till Jocky's pot-sows't braine was soking wet With liquor . With more good fellows in that throng , They quafft , & troul'd the wine bowls strōg , When Ioviall Jockey grew in wit and tongue The quicker . He gan to vaunt , and trumpet out , And blaze his Martiall acts so stout , And famous Combats , he had bravely fought With Mighties ; And said , his manifold renownes Were witnest by all hills and downes , And all the faires , and greatest market towns , And cities . As big , as hee , did Billy look , ( As good a man ) and could not brook His mountain-termes , but him to task betook , And girded ; Thou Braggadocio ; thou ( quoth hee ) Dar'st thou doe any thing with mee ? Th' art nothing but tongue-courage , now I see , To word it : You brag , and boast , and make such cracks To us , of your exployts , and acts , As if wee did not know of your great facts At weapon . T' is but thy trick thus in a house All-man ; to let thy tongue run loose : But in the field , thou dar'st not face a Goose , Or Capon . At these tearmes Elephantine James , With his two armes ( like Polyphemes ) Pot-fashion by his side , ( frō 's nostrill streames A vapour ) Sets his Officiall * Cap upright ; Stands like a Steeple tip-toe-height ; At Billy puffs , as hee had been as light , As paper . Thou fight with me ? thou Campingball ? By this * Cathedrall beard , I shall Slice thee to shreds , and chippifie thee small , As Chaff old : I tell you , Sauce , I scorne to flout , But thou shal't find mee true , and stout ; Before K. James , I James his name-sake fought o th' Scaffold ; For when the great Mogul came o're , And challeng'd all on England's shore , My Country's Credit had for evermore Bin undone ; Had I not entertayn'd him there , At sharp , before both Prince , and Peere , And sent him home-ward with a flea in 's eare From London . When I did serve great Buckingham , A lozell rascall at mee came , With his long forke , & layd on with the same Devoutly ; But I , that never knew dismay , Drew my short blade , and spoil'd his play , Struck up his heeles , and took his tooles away Most stoutly ; The Dukes acquaintance then I grew , Who ever since that time me knew . You cannot chuse but know this to be true : 'T is voyc't so A great reward to mee hee gave , For this exploit perform'd so brave : But from his office turn'd away the knave Deboyc't so . When thou art challeng'd to a place , Thou dar'st not looke a foe i' th face , But hang'st an erse ; and like a Coward base Do'st linger : But see the wounds , the scars , and blowes , This Corps hath had , by devilish foes ; See one , for many ; and with that he shewes c No-finger ; When halfe a score at least , I weene , Fell on me , with their Falchions keene , With Roman resolution I have beene The first on 't ; And laid about me stroaks so smart , That gall'd the Rascals to the heart , And gave them all e're they and I did part The worst on 't : Know Sr ; that for my courage bold , I did the place of Martiall hold ; To a worthy Knight , my name stands there enroll'd , No Peasant ; And when to Scotland Charles our King , On progresse went , but for one thing , I 'de gone the voyage with that roy all ring Most pleasant ; St Edmond's Bury never failes , To give Iames honour , since with Hailes , I plaid that prize ( t is knowne these are no tales I tell yee ) For while the Varlet made much chat , That he could doe , I know not what , I made his heeles to mount ; and laid him flat On 's Belly ; Yet fairely then I let him rise , To feast Spectators , with a prize Of Iames-es playing . At me hot he flies , But shuffel'd Then I , for all his pelting rage , Did quickly turne him off the Stage ; Iames ha's the day , cry'd all the equipage o th' Scaffold ; Hundreds came in mee to embrace : And happy hee could have the grace To get a look from conquering Jame-es face , To talk on : And as I went along the street , The boyes were ready mee to meet , And strow greene rushes underneath my feet To walk on . Gaites , * at New-market Court did dare To strike brave James a box o' th eare : But I soone put him in a Panick feare For 's errour ; Like Hercules that Gyant fell , When he drew Cerb'rus out of Hell , I drag'd him roaring from his lurking cell , In terrour ; For downe the stayres I straight did pull , Spite of his nose , the sawcy Gull , The while he cry'd , and bellow'd like a Bull , For pardon . Toth ' Presence-Chamber then the slave I brought : There pitty he to crave Fell downe on 's knees ; while I stood like a grave Church-warden ; And whilst my breast w th wrath was fill'd ; For halfe an how'r , and more he kneel'd To me ; beseeching I would please to yield Some mercy : My Lords , for him did interceed ; That I would pardon his bold deed ; ( Sure his long kneeling on his joynts did breed The farcy ) Yet I a Challenge him did write , If hee with mee could dare to fight , To meet mee at the * Devill 's ditch ; but try 't He would not . For knowne it was , the Court about , I had fou'r mighty Duels fought ; That with a whole skin come off safe ; hee thought He could not . This Wife I have , and the other too , When they my valour once did know , Were taken with me , cause I slash't it so Profoundly ; And should Iugg dye ; before the Spring , I yet could have a dainty thing ; That mee a hundred pound a yeare would bring ; And roundly . Let Iames but ride through any towne , In all this Kingdome ; Iames is knowne , By all good Fellowes , living up and downe The County . To welcome me , f one pawnes his Mare ; Another doth a Goose prepare ; Another his best Sack doth pierce , and share , With bounty . When thou in London walk'st , forlorne , The Car-men thee to greete doe scorne ; Vncouth thou goest to evening from the morn With sorrow ; The great Lord Mayor , if he see My noted person , speakes to me ; Come James , and welcome , dine with us he saith To morrow ; There 's ne're a Lord about the Court , But I to him have free resort , And boldly speak in earnest , or in sport My pleasure ; Let any Lawyer see but me , Though he be taking of a fee ; My sight will make him instantly to be At leisure : Most of the Gentry in the Land , Whom I with feats of Armes have man'd , Still call me Master , lead me by the hand To dinner . I tell thee ( Boy ) my conquering sword , Hath made me generally ador'd , More then befits ( now I speake this proud word A sinner . This man doth talke , as he were wild , ( Quoth Will ) we know you are no child ; Were not you he , that once * a royster foild In Pigscote ? In my conceit ( nor doe I faine ) Had you but met him , you had slaine , In Duell that victorious Knight of Spaine Don Quixot . Were I a Fencer though , like thee , To let one baste , and cudgell me , And then arrest him for a Batterie , Would shame mee : Hee cry'd you mercy for the harme , But who was it his hands did charme ? The arme of Iustice , not the vengefull arme Of Iamy . The fame , and fume of you is blowne , ( I know 't ) all over Bury towne , That dainty tricke of tayle-strong Iames is knowne To all men : An hasty pudding once you lay'd In your Friend's shirt ; and then affray'd Tooke to your heels ; in that you cleanly play'd The tall man ; Beside you play'd the man , and ha'fe , When * Harry with a walking staff Did bast your buff-skin ; then did you come off With credit : Or then , when * Iohn ( you wel know wher ) Struck up your heels , and laid you there Disarmed ; then you did the deed , if e're You did it . FILE III. The Challenge ; and Resolution . IAmes to the bottome stirr'd , a score Of teeth doth grate at him , and more ; And with a Demi-cannon oath doth roare Like thunder ; Flyes at him like a Tyget fierce , His very visage , sharp , did pierce Like vinegar ; the rest could keep them scarce Asunder ; Tell'st thou me ( Dogs-nose ) in this wise , That I was baffel'd once , or twice By Hal , and Jack ? Thou whorson Cockatrice , Thou Camell ; This foot of vengeance here shall kick Thy guts out ; send thy soule down quick To hell ; or make thee fawne upon me , like A Spanniell . Will , not so wordy was ; but needs He would with James have bin at deeds ; Strike slave ( qd . he ) I le beat thee smal , as weeds To porridge . Meet mee ( quoth Jocky ) if thou dare ; ( Quoth Billy ) I will , any where , To morrow morning : I doe scorne to feare Thy courage . To morrow ? If thou dar'st to night : For thou shalt never see day-light ; Besides , in day time , my swords glittering sight Will fright thee : Had I a weapon here , c as thou , Since th' art so hot on 't ; I would goe , ( Quoth Will ) to night , and make thee darely know I slight thee . Is that thy way to shift ? ( quoth he ) I 'le lend thee d one , to fight with me : Thou , & such friends shall have that courtesie And favour ; With that he fetch 't two Bilbo blades Hand-broad ; they would have digg'd like spades , And served Pioners in their earthen trades To labour . Was it your fortune e're to eye , The tooles of Bevis , or Sr. Guy ? Such were these blades , w th which stern Iames would try The Duell . Nor could the company perswade , With all intreats ; and reasons ayd , Iames , fierce , and furious , resolute , unstayd , And cruell ; Sirrah ( he roares ) mark what Iames saith , Ask me forgiveness while th' hast breath ; Or else I 'le make thee with a dolefull death To rue it . First , I will Cullendrize with holes , Thy Bull-thick hide , so good for soles ; Then slice thee thin , as rashers on the coales , Or sewet : Thy head I 'le from thy shoulders take , And of thy Scull a piss-pot make : And that same tongue , that now so much doth crake , I 'le smoak it ; Which I for start-up heeles will weare : Thy braines , I 'le pickle in dead beere , Or sowrest hog-wash ; Mark my words , and feare , I 've spoke it ; Then will I souse thy cheeks and eares , Provant for hungry Customers , When they come here , to wash away their e teares With Flagons : Thy Flesh I 'le slice in serverall parts , And have it try'd by Kitchin arts For greazing-stuffe , to liquor wheeles of carts , And wagons . Thy thred , poore Billy , now is spun : For e're that I with thee have done , I 'le hew thee small , as Atomes in the Sun , Or powder ; Or make thee run away most base , Or yeeld thy weapon in the place , And say th' hast bin before thy betters face Too proud here . Dost thou so well provide for me ? Mark how I have dispos'd of thee , ( Quoth Will ) and tremble : for of certaintie I le do it ; When I have hack't , and hewed thy Tun-carkass , and thy Ghost let fly Out of that Carrion-dungeon , thus will I Bestow it ; I 'le cut thy head off by the neck , And make thy scull a Standard peck ; ( For 't is a large one ; ) and a chaine shall deck The vessell . Those black locks from that pate I le teare , And have them woven for a haire To dry my * Hops ; thy armes & legs shal reare A tressell . That Nose of thine I 'le give some Smith , To serve him for a horn , where with To give Iades med'cines , through their halter'd teeth , And drenches ; That Face I on a Crotch will rayse A gastly Vizard ; Pyes and Iayes To scare from plumtrees ; or to fright young boyes And wenches : Then from thy flesh I 'le draw thy hide , And have it throughly tann'd , and dry'd Whit-lether-like ; thy trunck will I devide To parcells ; And with thy flesh I 'le cram my a dogs , Thy panch , and guts I 'le give my b hogs , which they shal draw , about the moores & c bogs In morsells ; Thy bones at scales the Boyes shall teare , Or ( cause they full of d shaking are ) I 'le have them cut out , into dice six-square , To play with ; That tongue of thine will I confer , Upon some Alminack-maker ; Some bragging Souldiar , or some Traveller , e To lye with . Thus blustring in confronting tearmes , Sworne to each other's deadly harmes , To hack , and hew , hands , legs , heads , sides , and armes , And hanches ; With just as much of wit , as sight , They through the darkness of the night , Went out , with their high stomacks fill'd up quite , And panches . FILE IV. The Field ; and March. A Field there is ; wherein doth stand A Castle , now lack-daw'd ; not man'd ; And soothly never by a humane hand Erected ; For old King Coël ( tales do tell ) When first he built that Warlike Cell , Consulted with the smoaky Pow'rs of Hell Collected : This King was tall ; * Gygantick vast , His foot was of the largest last ; 'T is everlasting ; I have summ'd , and cast The measure ; A Yard in Longitude , no more , Twelve Inches broad : Upon the Tow'r , O'th'Leads you still may see the shape at your Owne pleasure ; His Leg was correspondent . Some Affirme , his Boots did hold a Coome : This King in such a deale of Leathern roome Did trample . 'T is said , some broken Cobbling wretch , To set up's trade , them home did fetch , Nor did the Leather to his Conscience stretch So ample ; A many rumors old , and new , And , I think , more believ'd , than true , Are blaz'd abroad of this great King. Did you Ne're heare it ? Like Hawk , or Buzzard at his game , This King could fly in th' ayre ( sayes fame ) James will not only justifie the same , * But sweare it ; Whither hee flew in th' ayre , or no , I 'm sure he dived very low Into the earth , how deep no man doth know ; T's'admired ; Yet this may be concluded , by His fabrigs deep ground-work ; if fly He could not ; yet at least he very high Aspired : Besides by Black-art , like a Mole , He under ground did work a f hole : Wherese're his corps is , I think yet his soule Doth haunt it ; By which he had a ready way To play the Cater ; and convey For all his Souldiers food enough , e're they Did want it ; For when the Danes had over-run The Land , this Fort they set upon , Resolv'd to slay , or ever they had done , Or sterve them ; But through this vault there was such store Of g victuals brought , that they threw ore Food to the Foe ; and , if they needed more , They 'd serve them : Long long hath stood this strōg built Tower , And ( as the Fates have told Iohn Gower ) Vn-undone shall it stand yet many an hower , Though tatter'd ; The Walls , with open mouths , do speak Against the mattocks , that still seek The ruine of it , and long since did break And batter't ; So that in stead of Majesty , Now onely Seniority It justly claimes , yet still it looks as a high As ever ; Whiles all the hammer's spitefull strokes , And fierce malicious fangs of hooks , Do what they can , pul down these stately looks Shall never ; The Tow'r is girded with a Wall ; In fashion of a Varthingale Upon a hill , begotten of a vale Below it ; This Hill by b figure doth declare , The Tow'r hath stood long out of square ; The pye ' ball'd prospect of the walls so bare Can shew it . Here , what the Danes could never do , The Dawes have done , and wrought into The walls and chambers of it ; And now who But they there ? The house fee-simple is their owne , For them ; their heires ; there they alone Can build , can gossip , strut it up , and downe , And play there . Here many tall Ghost's walk : 't is thought King Coël wanders still about , Sometimes within the vault , sometimes without , At 's pleasures ; And here , in dull Night's sullen shade , ( Because the Circle's ready made ) The light-foot Fayries , dance the rounds , and tread The measures ; And in the Moon-light nights have beene Hobgoblins Robin goodfellowes seene , With lights : and noyses have bin heard o' th' green Of talking ; And other visions strike with feare Folk going by : yea sure there were That night , Goodfellowes , when those two were there Awalking : These Champions hither march't forthright , To scare the Devill in the night , And Fayries from their round-abouts affright With horrour . Now may you by this time suppose These two are at it very close , With dashing , clashing , banging , bumming , blows Of terrour ; For having strip't themselves , their skin Each th' other shew'd , so far as seene By night they could be , and at distance , then , Fell to it ; And layd on load with might , and maine , Let who 's would take it off againe , What there was don , would ask no little pain T' undo it . FILE V. The Search , and Sadnes . BUt ( oh ) conceive what griefes , what kind Of woes , possest us all behind ; For these two whetted spirits . Words , & wind Exprest it ; We sigh 't , we groan'd , as hart would burst , Care in our cups made us a thirst : That season , and their tameless fury , worst Molested ; For ( note ye ) when such stomacks grew , At variance , and to weapons flew , There must perforce of consequence ensue A slaughter . O dismall night , like that of Troy : O lamentable-following day , That must the fate of both , or one bewray Hereafter . Brave Caesars , and great Pompeyes might ; Fierce Hector , and Achilles fight , Must come behind this , that befalls this night Thus sadly ; For by transparent beames of Day , Those could observe each others play ; But these run desperate , to a blindfold fray Most madly : Thus forth we wander , where we guess Them hurry'd by their furiousness , To stop , or spy them , as eye-witnesses , Thus falling ; But ( oh ) the fate of Darknes ! Night Our Optick sense had seal'd up quite ; That now , more sad we walk along , the fight Bewayling . Our eyes can do no good ( we say ) If all our senses in the way Do fayle us too , then must the light of day Discover : Still rambled we the fields a round In grievous plight , and nothing found ; No hope was offer'd , but in vain much ground Past over . FILE VI. The Encounter , and Weapon . AT last behold here how one sence Supplies his friend's deficience , ( Were it by any happy providence , Or fortune ) As to the Castle neere we grew , Where these two forth their tackling drew , Vnhop't for objects did our sence anew Importune . For presently a fresh we met A fume , that did our noses fret , And piercing to our hearts did them beset With dull feare . Oh! foh ! ( sayes one ) my nostrils find We have Gunpowder in the wind : Thus fumes Salt-peeter when it is calcin'd With sulpher . Another cryes : O heavie lot ! Sure they have guns , or Pistols got , And mutually let fly their deadly shot , Which vapours . But straight we found it , that the smell , Though but ill-favour'd , favour'd well For them . With thē worse had by guns befell , Or Rapiers ; For we ( concluding to have seen Or both , or one upon the green Ly dead , or maim'd by Gun , or Falchion keen With fighting ) So far as eye a sight could gaine , See them with backsides might and main , Like darting Porcupines , ( to tell you plain ) Ash — Lo in this wise , these Champions twaine Together did their utmost straine . Much ther was shed : but neither of them slain , No truly . Sure much was shed all o're the grass . For all , which by next day did pass , By signes did see what dreery fight there was But newly : We puft and snuft , and peer'd about : Stil , still these Fencers flash't it out , And buckling too 't like strong-tayl'd Lions fought , Hard striking . In each was op't a postern wound : Of bouncing Eccho did rebound , The strokes they dung against the suff'ring ground , All reaking . FILE VII . The Parley , and Parting . AT this discovery , joy'd ; * Sirs ; yet Le ts not , while they are in the heat , Come in the dint ; lest some soure mark we get Not pleasing . At length we clos'd with them , and felt , ( Yet warily ) these whom we smelt . Come worthy Champions you have bravely dealt : Be ceasing : This is a new-found Martiall trick , To fight at tayle , whiles others strike At head , at throat , at brest , at belly , like Mad wretches . With night , and rage , they are o'regone , And so they be mistook ( sayes * Iohn ) And for their doublets , thus have they undone Their b breeches . Who ere comes here , to judge the close , Without th' imployment of a Nose , Must passe no verdit of the strongest blowes I' th' Duell : Well , Sirs I think you 'l be content , Now you have given your Stomacks vent ; The fire of ire will vanish , now y'have spent The Fuell ; Put up , then ; let 's have no foule play : Let all this geere be wip't away ; I hope there is no hurt done in the fray To neither . Or if you be so fierce and fell , That with your Blades , you yet will deal , Then cut this vapour-thickned ayre , and smell Together . FILE VIII . The Retreat , and Triumph . IAmes shuffling up his pipes ( quoth hee ) Will , at this game 's too hard for mee ; I 'le be for this , till I make even with thee , Thy debter . But Will with Iames would yet have fought ; Not now ( quoth Iames ) my anger 's out ; And heat quite over : let 's go drink about ; That 's better . Give me thy hand ( if it be cleane : ) Both are by this the better men ; I 'le ne're fall out with thee ( Brave boy ) agen Hereafter . But whensoe're thou dost desire , I 'le stand by thee a friend intire , And venture this same head , through sword , & fire , And water . Why should we two , we two old friends Bring one another to our ends ? Death soone enough without a sword will send 's To ashes . Say we are hurt , say we are kill'd : Had we not better thus to yield , Than lie here dead , or wounded in the field With slashes ? Say fighting Credit to us gave : Can Credit cure a cutt ? can't save A leg ? shall we ( if lam'd ) by Credit have Our keeping ? I 'ue thirtie yeares a Fencer been , A thousand fights have fought , or seen , I ne're could find but in a whole sound skin Best sleeping : Since I discretion had , 't hath stood My resolution , 't is not good , To be thus prodigall of guiltlesse blood With fooling : And they that have such sp'rits high flowne , And are so hot , and bloudy growne , One day may come unto their cutting downe , And cooling : Will , Will , consider ; wee have soules , Wee have not lives like Cats , or Owles : We sans remorse have bāgd the burning bowls A long space ; O woe ! 'T is dangerous fighting now ; For if we should be slaine , I trow , Our ghosts i' th dark may miss their mark , and go To th'wrong place . Thus James agreed it : and ( 't is said ) Though most enraged , and unstaid , Hee first the other wholsome motion made Of stinking . Well , friends they were , & came down right All to the Taverne , where they quite Washt all away with wine , & soakt the night With drinking : For rending ope the Sellar a dore , A good Sack b Tierce they turned o're , For joy so sweetly they had scap't so c sore A battle : Healths thick and three fold to the wounds , That ne're were made , they drunk in roūds ; The old bang'd quart pots ( never past their d bounds Did rattle . FILE IX . The Reward , and Honour . IVdge Reader , how this place became So stout a Blade , as brave Sir Jame . Ought not this fight to be enrold by Fame , To last here ? Hee is a man of mightie heart , And practiz'd well , to play his part With greatest skill , Professor in his art , And Master . Sure when old Coel there did raigne , His Tower never did maintaine So brave a Lad , in all his martiall Traine For valour ; Nor was so hot a fight by Danes , Whiles they encamped on those plaines ; Nor so deep charge w th such tēpestuous strains Of cholor : What man soe're with Jockie fights , When he into that humour lights , Had need be watchful , expert , quick in slights , Not slothfull : For , if hee lookes not better too 't , And keep his chaps most surely shut , He may not only have his hands full , but His mouth full . O were the Castle in repaire , My Jockie should some Office beare , Of Master-Gunner , or at leastwise there Of Porter : Then if a Cannon's bellowing blast The wall had bored through , or rac't , He soon might daub the breach up with a cast Of morter . And then all foes I would advise , To keepe away ( if they be wise ) From Jockie's Bum-shot , lest with losse of eyes They rue it . All a you that spie there in your way The Monument of that sad fray , By adding b stuffe , to keepe it from decay , Renue it . No charge , great ease will you befall , The paines of portage is but small . Unload your native dung-cart : that is all , In sadness . This field may prove ( manur'd so well ) An Hop-yard : big those Hops will swell , And beare away at * Sturbridge faire the Bell For fatness . If any reading this my Newes , Shall think that I with lies abuse My Champion Jockie , and my jocund Muse To faigne them ; Out of your way ride but a mile , And call , and talk with James awhile ; And he himself , will in an ample stile Maintaine them . What if you lose a mile , or twaine ? As wise , to see a sight as plaine , Have stepp'd aside , nor of their pains , as vaine , Repented . Here you not onely shall behold Sights , signes , but heare strange wonders told , And many a score of more Adventures bold Out-vented ; And Wine , and Welcome still your fill ; And jests , and newes too , what you will : For hee 's more full , than is my dropping quill , Of Storie : You 'l ne're repent of any cost , Or time , to see so brave an Host , Of sight of whom you may for ever boast , And glorie . Epilogus . HOld Muse : the Combat finisht is ; The Foes are Friends againe , I wis : It may be I shall dearly pay for this Thy laughter . And Reader , list awhile and heare : John Gower is * su'd , and must appeare : If this suit hold , the Progresse hee 'l declare Hereafter . His Proctour entertain'd in May , To answer what the foe shall say , A prosp'rous Gale ( I hope ) will find faire way In sayling . What Defamation here can lie Against a Poet's industrie , Who faineth not , but writes true Historie Sans rayling ? Yet Jockie doth at him so vex , That hee in rage cries , Currat Lex ; Resolv'd by cunning of his Lawish tricks To shrieve him : But sure this Case ( so all men think ) The more it stirs , the worse 't will stink : Astraea , Phoebus , lest your Gower shrink , Relieve him . Johannes Gower . To the High-spirited , heroick-hearted , Stout-stomackt , bold-brested , cruel-couraged : Hypseloglotticall , Rhetorologicall , Archinoeticall ; Invincible , Victorious , worthy , noble , generous , Sr Iames , Grand-possessor , and Professor , as well Oenopoliall of the rarest , fairest , dearest , Pomperkin , Hullock , Mellogodoone , Frantiniack , Canary , Musquedine Wines , as Gymnasiarchicall , of the Martiall Science of Defence ; Monomachounticall , and Polymachounticall Greeting , not Grating . THe mightie Acts of your Olympick arme , Whose pow'r Pancratiastick all doth charme , Put downe great Hercules , and stride before All his vast Labours , had they been twelve score . What you enroll in lines both high and strong . O' th Velom of your owne Stentorian tongue . I doe omit , nor make my Muse's Theame , To add more water to a swelling streame ; But this fierce fight , devoyd of sight , and light , Encourtainiz'd in Stygian shade of Night , I have displayed to the rayes of Fame : For that desires , and you deserve the same ; For which my Muse heere prostrite , you doth woo To bee , as Subject , so Protector too ; Erave Pentathletick Royster ; daigne to take This into favour for your honour's sake ; It is your Art , and part now to desend This Case , your fighting selfe , your writing friend . It is a Nosegay therefore sweet enough ; Call'd from your Garden ; take it not in snuffe . A Dish first drest by you , now sawc't and grac't To please your Palate : doe not it distast . A Stage erected by our Mose to shew Your Master-piece to all Beholders view : More Amphitheatrall then piles of wood ; O doe not fire it in your angry mood . Behold the verse , though number'd odd , and rough , Yet , measur'd even , smoothly apt for you : The feet your fingers fit , and may be scann'd With Bidexteritie of either hand . Two Tetradactyles mournfull numbers fit That hand , whose finger by the Beares was bit . The Pentaedactyle for your left , more high To sing your deedes , doth mount Heroickly . The short dwrafe-verse to scan if 't be thy pleasure , Then thump upon thy Stump , and there 's the measure . Sir , if that favour shall with you be found , To you our Muse shall with her Booke be bound . Your's at a cast , vnto his last : Idem quidem , qui pridem , IO : GOVVER . WOrthy Poeticall Client , I have viewed the Information you sent me : which will sufficiently direct me in framing your answer . By reading it I am suddenly trans-formed , and become a Rythmicall Proctor . Whereof I give you a Proofe : which , when I plead your Apology , shall serve for a Preface ; in manner and forme following , Iohn Gower's Proctor's Allegation To Iockie's plea of Defamation : Advis'd , devis'd , revis'd with consultation . VVHat rays'd Achilles acts of might ? Not that he did with Hector fight : But that he did on Homer's trumpet light To tell them . Nor had these fuming feates of Fame , Blowne up so high stout Iockie's name , Had Gower's Lime-hound nose not beene in frame To smell them . The fivefold fights , which chanted came Through Pindar's quill , to this are lame : All Greece of such a brave Olympick game Ne're craked . Here Mars and Bacchus so combine : No Bush shall need to vent thy wine : Two Parthians shooting backward be thy signe Halfe naked . Then Travellers through thick , and thin , Will flocke to this new-named Inn : Where all in rich Canary will begin To Iocky . And Will must not be wrastled out , Who did so well maintaine the Bout. This Combat's fume made all our Hops ( I doubt ) So crocky . Colonus Felis. Expound this Latine into Greek : My name you need not further seek . A Congratulatory verse , to the bravely resolved IAMES , the horrid Babby of bloody-handed Bellona Arch-Duke of Canary , and great Commander of the omnipotent forces of Bacchus , in the infernall Region of his well-bung'd , and wellbang'd Barrells . MArs-daunting Martialist , a silent tongue Of thy great acts do's thy great self great wrong ; Too little stages thy Pancratick rage Have grac't , th' art now brought on the world's great stage ; Loe , here the trumpet of thy wandering fame , The Herauld-blazer of thy dreadfull name : Thou hast an Atlas whose unshrinking shoulders Of thee , against sharp Censure , are upholders . Illustrious Iames , thou hence forth shalt inherit Achilles * name , as thou dost his brave spirit ; What 's said of him is but a pleasant fiction , And seemes of thee to be a true prediction : Thy mother did thee ( young ) by th' Finger take , And drench't thy body in the Stygian Lake , Made it impenetrable ; for no wound Was yet in all thy Broyles e're made , or found , Save in that fatall Finger . ( Poets tript In saying 't was the Heele , their finger slipt . ) Canary is thy Achyllaean Speare , That hurts , and heales , and strikes , more joy , than feare : Thy valiant * Myrmidons with thee ( brave Boy ) Are able to subdue another Troy. E. A. To my good Schoole-Master , Mr. Iohn Gower , and to my good acquaintance , his Book . THe Printer writes , our Masters Booke will sell : And I must write our Master writeth well . Yet meanes he not to make a Schoole-booke of it : For that would turne to our , and his small profit . Our Dames of Heningham would chide , and say That boyes are sent to study not to play . And so wee doe . For dayly all the weeke He teacheth us true Latine , trusty Greeke ; But yet on Holydayes , and playing howres , He gives us leave to reade of English Towres , Which have of old in siedge the Danes withstood ; Or beene besmeer'd with English cloder'd blood : And of stout Champions who at every stroake , Have made the walles of warlike Castles smoake . Alumnus tuus IOSEPHVS HARRINGTON . OVr Master Iohn Gower Hath writ of a Tower , Which lookes much batter'd and broken . Not farre from those walles , I have oft play'd at Scales . And is not that a good token ? Of Iames he hath written A story no fitten , ( I know well that Gyant of valour ) A deadly sore fight i th' dead of the night , O! he is more stout then a Taylour . I had rather runne hence , Then meet him at Fence , Vnlesse I might give him Schoole-butter : What though he be bare ? Yet strike I scarce dare , Lest he begin first to utter . WILL : BRAMSTON , Discipulus . Vpon the Castle-Combat . THy Worke is sweet , but comes from matter sower : So rankest dung brings forth the fayrest flower . Thus I salute my gentle Master Gower . DRVOO TINDALE , Qui tibi Discipulus nunc sum , cupioque doceri . THe Printer dreames this Booke will sell the better ; If Castle-Schoole doe send to him a letter . I am therein a Schollar , young and tender : And yet am bold to be a poore commender . Thus I my hearty Commendations send , Print well ; Farewell , my unknowne London Friend . EDMUND BRAMSTON . Discipulus Gowerianus . A Quaere with a Quare concerning Iohn Quis. VVHat Iohn ? What Gower ? Iohn Gower , Chaucers friend ? He liv'd ; & * wrote renow'd in times of yore : And now belike , according to the lore Of great Pythagoras , himselfe doth lend . Thus , by Soule-shifting , Virgil's ghost did wend To Spencer's lodge . Who Ovid was before ; Is Drayton since . Thus Lucan Fates restore In May. Thus Orpheus soule doth Quarl's attend . Let Heralds thee engower when thou wilt brave it : Thy Muse for name ; and fame makes Affidavit . EDM : IOHNSON . For the Castle Combat . I Speake it boldly ( for I need not shuffle ) This fight encounters with the Counter-Scuffle . Those Eggs , the Loaves , the Lobstars , Plase ; and Ling , The Pippin-pyes ; and all , that they did fling , Concocted were but artificially In Culinary fires by Cookery : But here the weapons are of nobler temper , Refin'd in Natures Kitchin. Constat semper , That Nature added unto Art doth make A better worke , than Art can undertake . A custard back'd is not so strong a bullet , As when for after batch it past the gullet . The Oven , Caldron , Spits , are all but Sluts Compar'd with humane stomacke ; Liver , Guts . And therefore 't is more honour to be beaten With tooles of meat already chew'd and eaten . O brave heroick shott ! O field well wun ! Where cumbatants have made their Corps their Gun. I say againe , Mars did more richly ruffle In Castle-Combat , than in Counter-Scuffle . IOHANNES de ATOCHA . FINIS . Notes, typically marginal, from the original text Notes for div A01996-e200 a His wine for the most part is thunder-stricken . b The Falcon still flying hard by the Castle , and preying upon many a peasant . c Essex , id est , East Saxons . a A river risi●… not above fo●… miles from th●… town , on the North side . b The Earle of Oxford . c A strong compound of two easie simples . d These Bells doe roare to th● day at St. Edmunds Bury , i● lamentation of their exile from their native soyle . * 〈◊〉 singing the 〈◊〉 * A black lea●…r generous 〈◊〉 which hee ●…ares , because ●…e will march ●●der the colour an Officer . * He gives th●… surname to his Beard , when h● stroakes it with an oath most gravely . c In a cowardly ●…uffle the mid●e finger of his ●●ght hand ( vul●●rly called the ●…les finger ) was 〈◊〉 off ; which often shew●●h for an ho●●…urable Cha●●cter of va●●r , and vowes 〈◊〉 this tricke he ●●ll never keepe ●…ares againe ; 〈◊〉 they ( as hee ●●es ) bit off 〈◊〉 fatall fin●● . * One of the Guard ; as Iames reporteth . * A long dry trench on New-market heath . f This welcome ●as bestow'd ●…n Iames in ●●…dleigh in ●uffolke by one ●escended from be line of Mars . * This was Granger Sewster of Ashwel in Herford-shire , accounted a notable Duellist , whom Iames in a combat so fiercely pursu'd , that he ran into a Hogs-coat . * Harry Smith * Iohn Sewell of Halsted . c 〈◊〉 Iames●rovided ●rovided , ●●rell be●… his house . d ●●mes , who ●●nd is still , ●●ockt with ●…ons in his ●●e . e When t●●… are Maudi●… drunke . * Which are 〈◊〉 plentifull that towne ; 〈◊〉 William a ●●…pmaster . a Of which Cattell William keeps many . b Which are appurteinances to William's house , being a Farmer ; c Of which , many border upon that Towne . d For Iames-es terrestriall body by this time was in Motu trepidationis . e In which trade Iames is a great dealer . * At Colchester in the High street hee is set forth in a small volume , or Epitome , to save excessive expence of tymber ; or because dwarf Coēl is strong enough to guard a Pump . * Furthermore he will tell you of a man in this Towne of 105 yeares old , who heard King Coël cry Dad Dad in his mothers belly . f Rumor runneth , that this vault runneth under ground from thence to Colchester . g Which they brought underground from Colchester . a Two of t●● Turrets still r●maine in the first top-galla●… height , thou●… other parts b● defaced . b Which Circular . * This Councell was not Cowardly , but Cleanly . * Iohannes de Atocha , a Scholler then in the company . b 'T was ( doubtles ) lest they should wrong them through the approaching fight . a For Iug in 〈◊〉 fussian fume , o● fustie feare ha●● lockt up dore , & conver'd her se●… and her keyes t●… their nights rest b By Iames hi● owne epotativ●… words , halfe a Hogshead c Potius sowr●… d Of measure . a The neighbouring Inhabitants of Castle-Heningham . b Viz. dissolving your ligaments ; and imitating these Combetants . * Surely then will sell for ●igher price under the name of The gilded Hops of He●ingham . * William●●ke ●●ke a Wrastler , took him by the Collar with a Processe in Aprill last past . Notes for div A01996-e13320 An Apostrophe to Iames. Ever since this ●ight the Hops ●hereabout haue ●in blasted and ●…ooty Notes for div A01996-e13870 * Achilles , 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 , à solvendo dolorem , for hee makes his guests merry with tales and jeasts . * Busie pott●… of Wine , a●… pots of Beere . Notes for div A01996-e15080 * See his Monnument in Sai●● Mary Overie Church neere London .